#sure we used to smoke sometimes at home at the window but we cant do that anymore because theres a literal baby here

[littlemissmiller]

𝑆𝑢𝑚𝑚𝑒𝑟 𝐻𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑠

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟑: 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞 𝐁𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫

Pairing: drug dealer!coriolanus snow x fem!reader

Summary: (au) with your graduation party around the corner, coriolanus is nervous to see you again. and with summer flying by, it’s doubtful he’ll get to have you as his own before college. after your party, your boyfriend throws a house party and you decide not to go. meanwhile, coriolanus sees something that involves your boyfriend and knows it might just be the end of your relationship…

Warning: 21+ (drinking, use of drugs, smoking) underage drinking, eventual smut, fluff, mentions of smut, boob groping (not done to MC), slight obsession, possession, toxic relationship, slight stalking

Word count: 4.1k

A/N: hi…… (•_____•) ok it’s finally here. i was trying to get this out sooner but now that billy is done (which ugh cant wait for the next season already 😩) i’ll have more time to delicate to this series. also i was getting a request done and still have another coming up. so chapter three…not much to say other than oh boy the plot is getting juicy and im so happy with this one! ok that’s it ummm sorry for the time length on these but i will be writing it all summer so enjoy ❣︎

Series Masterlist | Playlist

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

A few weeks had gone by and Coriolanus’s high hopes of having you to himself was dwindling. It’s not like he saw much of you anymore, and had no idea how to hang out with you alone without your boyfriend stirring up shit. He received your graduation party invitation and was mentally preparing to see you again. Each time he went to Sejanus’s house, he would check to see if you were home, and sometimes you’d be outside. He would awkwardly wave and you’d smile back. Something he noticed however, was the fact that he seems to see less and less of Devon’s car. Coriolanus would try not to get ahead of himself, but he could help but think maybe you and Devon were closer to breaking up. Still, that gave him little hope since he wasn’t sure what to do about it.

As he sits with Sejanus in his room, he slowly blows out the smoke from his joint, through his window. Sejanus coughs and turns his head.

“You know you could use this from time to time. You might be less anxious.”

“Maybe…”

The high flows through him, his mind going numb, his body feeling light and calm. He takes another hit before knocking off the ashes and settling it on his ashtray. Another euphoric wave washes over him again and he leans back in his chair and sighs. He takes a swig from his Red Bull and picks up his controller.

“Wanna do teams this time, kinda wanna get some online stats up.”

“Yeah”

As the two boys continue their game, Coriolanus is glad to not feel as pent up and angry. He finally feels like his mind isn’t obsessing over you for the first time all day. It has become a daily, if not hourly occurrence. His mind racing with thoughts. Thoughts of you, naked before him, your beautiful mouth agape and ready and you begging to suck him off. He would also imagine you on all fours, your perfect ass stuck up in the air, pussy on full display. What he would give to rub his face in it, bury his tongue deep inside you until you came.

Coriolanus shifts in his seat, his thoughts now fully back on you. Just as he thought he was doing better with his fantasies of you He takes another hit to drown out his feelings.

“Aw man these guys are good.” Sejanus exclaims

“We can beat them…”

The two boys finish the round, beating the other team. They play a few more rounds, then Tigris knocks on the door.

“Oh god, how can it still smell with the windows open.” She asks, face scrunching up

“I lit a candle” Coriolanus quips

“Still, anyways, I got you an outfit for tomorrow.”

“Oh you’re going too?” Sejanus questions

“Why wouldn’t I?” Coriolanus shrugs

“Because of Devon.”

Tigris leaves momentarily and comes back with a nice white button up, decorated with small red roses. Even with the design, it’s still masculine enough for Coriolanus liking. They were small enough to look like scattered polka dots and honestly it’s very sophisticated and sexy.

“It should fit. I borrowed your graduation shirt for measurements and I think that nice pair of your dad’s of black khakis will look perfect.”

“You made this?” He asks

Tigris nods with a big smile.

“Well I thought that she’d like it. Leave Devon for you. You’re far more handsome anyways.”

She, referring to you. Of course Tigris knows without him saying anything. He doesn’t mind. Coriolanus' heart skips and he smiles back at his cousin, appreciating the kind gesture.

“I appreciate it, Ty.” Of course

Tigris waits as he tries it on. He takes his shirt off and buttons up the new one. Coriolanus looks in the mirror. It fits him just right and he likes how it cuts into his figure.

“Yeah. It’s perfect.” He moves his arms around making sure it wasn’t too tight in any places.

Tigris smiles and leaves the room. Coriolanus hangs up the shirt and sits back down on the bed, putting his old, worn white shirt back on. The two boys continue playing their game.

“It looks nice.” Sejanus remarks

“Thanks man.”

“Oh guess what!” Sejanus perks up as he hits a combo attack

“What?”

“I uh think Devon and them might be done soon. “

“Why?” Coriolanus inquires

“I hardly see him anymore. And last night he stormed off big time. I could hear them yelling from my window. I think it might have been about you, but I wasn’t too sure.”

“Really. Like what?” The blonde leans in closer

“He was mad that someone was coming to the party tomorrow, and shouted at her that she needs to do something about him…”

Coriolanus’s mind fires up again. Through the fog of his high, he refocuses, and he feels sharp with this new found knowledge. He smirks to himself, satisfied that Devon feels pissed off by the very idea that Coriolanus Snow will be in attendance at his graduation party. He likes this feeling. The power he holds from afar and the fact that he seemingly lives rent free in Devon’s head. And maybe even in yours. Coriolanus would selfishly love to see you two break up. He would do anything to have you.

He smashes one of the other players off the map, winning the round. Feeling victorious, and not just from the video games, Coriolanus lights up his joint again. He places it in his mouth, inhales, and blows it out the window. He falls back into a dream-like state. He takes another hit, inhaling deeper this time.

“Fuck dude.” Coriolanus whispers, the smoke escaping his lips as he talks

“What?”

“You think I have a chance with her?”

“Maybe.” Sejanus shrugs

The next day comes fast and Coriolanus once again drives to pick up Sejanus. You are already gone, setting up for the party. Coriolanus feels confident, cocky even as he rolls past your house. He drums his fingers on the steering wheel. His favorite Cage the Elephant song, Back Against the Wall, was playing and he couldn’t be happier. With his new shirt and the new cologne Tigris got him for graduation, he felt irresistible.

“Hey man! Looking good!” Sejanus exclaims as he hops into Coriolanus’s truck.

The two boys ride off to the country club. Money, Power and Glory by Lana del Ray starts to play as they roll up and Coriolanus hums along. As they are parking, a man in a black polo waves them down and Coriolanus assumes he’s a valet. He rolls down his window.

“Hey! Are you maintenance? You gotta go around back there should be some signs…”

“I’m here for the graduation party!” Coriolanus quips sharply

The man looks stunned and gives an apologetic expression.

“I’m so sorry! You can park down that way umm the valet should be…” he looks around frantically

“Thanks!”

Coriolanus drives past him and huffs in frustration.

“That was rude.” Sejanus remarks and Coriolanus simply rolls his eyes. They park a little further from the rest of the cars and walk up the entrance. As they walk up Coriolanus notices Sejanus is carrying two little gift bags.

“Ma got them $200 for Bed Bath and Beyond…”

“Well I didn’t bring anything.” Coriolanus mumbles as they walk in.

The country club is huge. Wide windows looking out onto the golf course, with nearly polished mahogany wood floors, and the main entrance leading into several areas to sit and eat drinks. The furniture is equally as grand, with red chesterfield chairs and couches and sitting on top of Persian rugs. The walls were a crème white and the whole place smells of old money. Various waiters and waitresses are walking around with flutes of champagne and hors d’oeuvres.

“I’m surprised that guy outside didn’t recognize me. I’m sure he knows we are members here…”

“It’s hard to believe that people like you would run around with anyone like the likes of me and my family anymore.”

“What do you mean? Your dad used to come here too?”

“Used to…”

Coriolanus didn’t talk much about his dad and it wasn’t a subject Sejanus would bring up often. It was true, before both his parents died, they had been wealthy, but his dad had worked with Mr. Plinth as Vice President of marketing, but tragically both his parents had died in a plane crash on vacation with Tigris’s parents, leaving them both orphans and in the care of the grandparents. However, Coriolanus would learn growing up that his father had blown most of his money away on gambling, leaving the Snow family name in debt and broke.

Sejanus quiets down and takes a caramelized onion, cream cheese tart from a waiter. He takes water as well and nervously sips it.

“Sorry I don’t mean to mention him.”

“It’s fine man.”

Then you flow into the room. You’re wearing a delicate, pink, strapless dress that flows as you walk. Your hair is slightly curled, bouncy, and has a pink satin bow to match. You’re absolutely precious, his eyes practically undressing you. You turn and smile at him. Coriolanus waves and you come greet him and Sejanus.

“Hey boys, glad you could come!” You beam

“Hey, where can I put these?” Sejanus pipes up

“Oh there’s a table by the entrance.” You point

Sejanus smiles, leaving you alone with Coriolanus. He tempers his breath and you step closer to him.

“You look nice.” He nods

“Thanks. You do too. Did Tigris make that?”

“She did” he beams back at her

“That girl is gonna work for Gucci one day…you uh smell nice again too.”

“Thanks. This is a good color on you.” He states, rubbing the fabric between his forefinger and thumb. You giggle and look at his hand. He immediately pulls back, a rush of embarrassment washing over him. Coriolanus feels his face getting red and he runs his fingers through his blonde buzz cut. But you still just smile at him, finding it charming that he’s slightly embarrassed.

“So where is my graduation gift from you?” You perk up, teasing him

“Oh I feel stupid saying this but I didn’t bring one I guess…”

“It’s fine. I have enough things anyways.” You joke

“Well this is nice of you to invite the whole grade. This place is lovely.”

“Yeah it’s nice to be able to rent the space. And it was cheaper to do it with Devon, so I guess it worked out nice.”

“I guess so.” He chuckles

You and him stand in silence for a moment until Sejanus returns. The three of you make conversation, Sejanus informing you that his mom got you a gift card and you thank him. Coriolanus starts to ask what you are looking forward to the most about college and you light up. You start talking about how amazing the medical science program is and how you simply can’t wait for the biology labs. Coriolanus couldn’t understand how anyone would be truly interested in what you’re talking about, but he loves how much it interests you. He loves how passionate and smart you are on the subject, and clings to every word. You brush your hair to the side and Coriolanus can’t help but let his eyes trail your shoulders and collar bone. He would love to kiss the bare skin in front of him. Just in the divot of your bone and then, all the way up to your neck. Would you whine for him? Moan at his lips on you, as he shows you how beautiful you are. How much he loves you. He’s so lost in his thoughts he doesn’t even notice Devon making his way towards the group

Sejanus nudges Coriolanus who looks at him, then sees Devon. He calls to you and you spin around. You smile, but Coriolanus knows it’s a facade.

“Hey! Mom wants pictures so I’m stealing you away.”

Devon rubs your arm and pulls you to him. You start to trot away and follow him.

“Ok. Well I’ll see you boys around.” You call out

Devon glares at Coriolanus, before leaning down to whisper something in your ear.

“Prick…” Coriolanus mumbles

As the party continues, Coriolanus and Sejanus make their way around, catching up with a few classmates. The country club has a nice, spacious outdoor patio and a big lawn for yard games. Eventually the two boys find their way to a Bags game and play against each other. You see him and find one of you girls to join you and Sejanus.

“Need some more players?” You ask

“Of course!” Coriolanus smiles.

You opt to stand on the same side as Coriolanus, while your teammate stands next to Sejanus. Coriolanus looks around for Devon.

“Where’s Devon?” He asks, trying to sound casual

“I think his dad said him and his buddies are going to do a few holes on the golf course.”

“At his own graduation party?” Coriolanus jokes

You shrug your shoulders.

“I’m just happy to be able to talk to you without him being a vulture.”

“Yeah he can be a bit much”

“Besides, I like being able to actually talk to you.”

Coriolanus feels his face get hot again, and bites his lip. Fuck. His breath hitches as he tries to casually toss a bean bag across the lawn. It lands on the board with a fat smack.

“Nice!” Sejanus calls out

“So are you going to Devon’s house party tonight?” You ask

“He’s having another party tonight?”

“Yeah I guess his parents are going out of town like immediately after this so he wanted to throw a banger” she sighs, putting the last few words in air quotes, mocking him.

Coriolanus snickers as you toss a bag over. It hits the board and slides off. You frown.

“I was trying to knock you off!” You giggle

“Gonna have to try harder.” Coriolanus remarks then pauses “ But umm…I’m not sure about the party.”

“I’m not either, but I might go. I know I’ll be kinda tired after today.”

Coriolanus ponders the offer for a moment. The possibility of hanging out with you longer is tempting, but not guaranteed. He sighs as he tosses his last bag, making it in.

“Man you’re good!” You exclaim.

The game continues and the two boys win by a far margin. After, Coriolanus chats it up with you, feeling comfortable and relaxed knowing Devon is off playing golf. You and him walk around and he wishes he could hold your hand, kiss your forehead and tell you how stunning you look. Touching your dress would be the closest thing he thought he would ever get to touching you in that intimate way. And here he is, talking to you about something besides physics or biology. You’re currently telling him about your Pinterest board for your dorm decor, a conversation he would normally find mundane, but coming from you, he’s utterly captivated. Eventually you and him find yourself alone inside, mostly isolated from the other guests. You stand there and he can’t help but want to steal a kiss from you, but he knew you’d never cheat. And he wouldn’t try anything of course, but your face, your beautiful plump lips, they look so soft. You are like a siren to him and he feels mesmerized.

Around 4 o’clock, Sejanus and Coriolanus say their goodbyes and head out. In the car on the way back to Sejanus’s house, the two discuss if they should go to the party. As they pull up to the driveway, Coriolanus’s phone dings. It’s one of his classmates, texting him about the party.

Hey, you selling tonight

Wasn’t planning on going

Ah ok then

He stares at the text, contemplating the offer.

“Hey you know what, let’s go tonight…”

“You sure.”

“Someone wants to buy. You think you can steal a couple of Valiums from your ma?”

The evening rolls around, and Coriolanus has changed into a pair of jeans and a black shirt. He puts on one of his Cuban link chains and some more cologne, just in case you’re there. As he rolls back into Sejanus’s neighborhood, he checks his pockets. He’s got a few ounces of weed on him, a few pills of ecstasy, and some acid tablets. Hopefully, Sejanus got the Valium. Coriolanus rolls back up to the Plinth house and turns down his music. Sejanus comes out, hands stuffed into his pockets. By the way he is glancing over his shoulder and awkwardly moving, he got the pills.

“You got them?”

Sejanus looks around and hands Coriolanus a small bag with six blue pills.

“Oh nice! Good work Sejay.” He takes the bag from his hands, stuffing in next to his weed.

“Thanks I guess.”

“You could use one of these. Probably more than a nice solid hit of flower.” Coriolanus suggests

“You’d feel bad too if it was your grandma or something.”

“Yeah, but c’mon your mom needs to get off these anyways. They aren’t doing her much good.”

“I guess so.”

The two pull up to Devon’s house and the music from the basement is booming. He looks around for your car, but it’s nowhere to be found. A few girls head in and Coriolanus watches them. It’s a group of your friends, but you’re not with him. He hangs his head and sighs. You’re probably not coming, he concludes. He curses at the steering wheel, hitting it. A part of him feels like he’s wasting his time, but he would like to make a little extra cash. Fuck it. Sejanus looks at him with concern, but exits the car. They enter through the front door, and find the stairs to the basement. The music blares loudly and the main lighting is replaced with LED strips glowing all along the walls. It’s packed and smells like indica and beer. Coriolanus searches around for a solo cup and a bottle of Captain Morgan. He finds both next to the beer pong table and pours himself a drink. He takes a swig, loving how it warms his body.

“Are you gonna need me to drive home?” Sejanus inquires tentatively

“I’ll be fine. Here.” Coriolanus shoves a cup into Sejanus’s hands and pours him some rum. He takes a small sip and scrunches up his face. He lets out a heavy cough, causing Coriolanus to roll his eyes. He looks around and you're still nowhere to be found. He takes another drink. After a few more sips, he feels woozy and eventually a classmate of his approaches wanting some weed. He sells him an eighth of an ounce for $35 and then a few more people approach. He sells a few tabs of acid for $65 each and a Valium for $40.

“Fuck dude, you really know how to make money.”

“It’s a simple job if you’re not too uptight.” He eyes Sejanus.

They walk around, a few more people buy from Coriolanus and about an hour later, he had about $430 dollars. Eventually, one of your friends ask for a Valium.

“Here.” He hands it to her, taking the $40

“You drive a high price. Can't you give me a little discount?”

“Why.”

“Cause you like my friend.” She bats her eyes

“Yeah and if you were her, then maybe. Are you buying for her?”

“If I said yes would I get a discount?”

He shakes his head. She rolls her eyes and walks away. Coriolanus wasn’t sure if you had done a drug stronger than Tylenol. He wasn’t aware of any surgeries or injuries you had, so it was doubtful you had even taken morphine for pain. He imagined it though. Your little pink tongue sticking out, a tab of acid hanging from the end. How sexy would you look in nothing but your underwear like that too. Or maybe you’d be more sophisticated, and he thought of you naked in your bath, joint hanging loosely in between your fingers. He’d love to see you like that. All naked, clean and high.

He walks around to find Sejanus, who is trying his best to drunkenly flirt with one of his classmates. He walks past a back room in the basement, glances in for a moment and instead finds Devon. At first he stands back, hides, and scoffs quietly to himself. Then he hears a giggle, followed by a moan. He peeks his head in slightly and finds Devon making out with some girl. And it’s definitely not you. He’s slowly teasing the girl’s shirt down her body, and he reaches down to grope her breast harshly, kissing her neck.

“Fuck…” he whispers into her

Coriolanus is stunned, can he really believe his eyes. He’s not surprised given Devon’s reputation, but still. He thinks for a moment and then, silently pulls out his phone. He opens it and pulls up his camera. He hits record. Coriolanus angles it to hide the camera, but makes sure that he can still see the girl on top of Devon and his face. She moves on him, moaning his name and whispering about how “Miss perfect” couldn’t please him like this. Coriolanus’s blood boils at that remark. He slowly backs away and then when he finds a secluded corner and reviews the video on his phone. Coriolanus turns the volume down just enough so he can hear and leans in. He rewatches the video and can clearly see Devon’s face and can clearly hear the other girls voice. It’s perfect. But how to use it.

Coriolanus makes sure the video is saved on his phone, before rushing off to find Sejanus again. Coriolanus walks around, pushing past people, until he finds him awkwardly chatting it up with some girl.

“Hey” Coriolanus announces himself

“Hey Snow…” the girl says

“Dude c’mere! I gotta show you this” he demands, dragging Sejanus away.

“What! What’s up?”

Coriolanus whips out his phone and pulls up the video. Sejanus leans in, confused at first, but then, realizes. Eyes wide, he tilts his head in to hear the audio. He looks at Coriolanus in shock, mouth agape.

“Is that?”

“That’s Devon yeah…”

“Holy shit dude!” Sejanus laughs, stumbling into Coriolanus slightly

“Yeah. Hey are you ok?” You wanna get outta here?”

Sejanus shakes his head drunkenly and Coriolanus takes his arm.

“Come on dude, let’s go.”

“But I was talking to someone…” he slurs

“Yeah, she seems busy.” Coriolanus nudges

The girl Sejanus was talking to is now preoccupied with another man’s mouth, aggressively making out with the other guy. He frowns and walks to the stairs, Coriolanus dragging him along. When the two boys get into the car, Coriolanus doesn’t feel drunk and honestly feels fine to drive. Truthfully, seeing Devon cheating sobered him up and he was still thinking of what he was going to do with the video. He turns the key, starts up his truck, and rides back to Sejanus’s neighborhood. On the way back, he thinks about the best way to get it out without having his name tied to it. He drums his fingers on the steering wheel, looking over at a passed out Sejanus, he gets an idea. He’s not sure who will see it or if it will work but he’s sure it will be anonymous. A popular app used at school to spread gossip anonymously, Yik Yak, Coriolanus thought it might just work to post it there. They finally reach Sejanus’s neighborhood, and Coriolanus glances at your house, a plan now in mind. As he pulls into the Plinth’s driveway, he wakes Sejanus up.

“Hey…we're home”

“Oh that was fast.” Sejanus mumbles, yawing

“For you. I’ll walk you in if you need it.”

“Nah man, I’ll be good.” He opens the door, waves and heads inside.

Coriolanus takes a deep breath and pauses for a moment. He whips out his phone and pulls the video up again. The lewd sounds of Devon’s moans start up again and Coriolanus cringes. Then, the thing that really pissed him off.

“I bet Miss Perfect couldn’t please you like this.” The girl moans

Coriolanus glances at the mirror, gazing at your house. He spots your car parked in the driveway as expected and realizes your most likely sound asleep. Sound asleep as your good for nothing boyfriend is sticking it in another girl. Fuck it. He pulls the app up and impatiently waits for it to load. Coriolanus pulls up his school’s group. And He taps the green plus sign, watching the cursor as it blinks. He then hits the video button and pulls up the video. It uploads and then he waits, looks back at your house again and frowns. He knew you didn’t deserve him and you needed to know that Devon was an absolute ass. You deserve better. He hits the post button and it sends.

꧁🝮❤︎︎🝮꧂

[literaila]

we used to

“the middle” 

spencer reid x reader 

summary: spencer cant remember the reader. she wont let him forget her. 

this is actually part two! part one here 

warnings: mentions of blood, mentions of pain, memories? angst. theres slashes though words (for example) but theyre meant to represent numbness

also! i wrote some of this while some teenage kids were watching me sit against a tree. i just thought that was important to add. enjoy! 

“Where did we meet?” 

“A little park. I was laying down enjoying the sunshine, and you came over, worried, and started checking my pulse. You said you wanted to make sure I wasn't dead.” 

She laughed. 

But she didn't tell him about the way his eyes had gotten bigger when she looked up at him. She didn't tell him how he swallowed, his face suddenly nervous. He didn't tell her how she had started laughing at him, and he blushed embarrassed. 

“After that, I asked if I could play chess with you. You let me win.”

She didn't tell him about the years she’d spent teasing him for that. She didn't tell him about the number she’d managed to slip into his bag when he’d been distracted. The number he didn't use for weeks. She didn't tell him how rejected she felt every day that went by, didn't tell him that she went to the same park almost every day just to see him. She didn't tell him about the disappointment that coursed through her veins every time she checked her phone. 

“Where was our first date?” 

“You took me to the museum. You were really nervous. I was almost worried you would run out of things to tell me.” 

She didn't tell him that it was one of the first things she’d noticed about him. That she’d loved that he had so much to say from the very beginning. 

They’d spent three days together. 

Spencer had to stay two weeks after he’d woken up. The first week was spent testing his memory, making sure everything was still in order. He spent day after day, meeting doctors, in machines. People were visiting him right and left, but he was almost always gone. 

She didn't see him much that week. 

The next week his doctors were sure that everything was fine. Besides the amnesia, there were no other effects on his brain. His broken leg was healing nicely, and he would be fine in a couple of weeks. 

But, they said, they wanted to keep him there just one more week, to make sure that they hadn't missed anything. 

So he stayed. 

And Y/N started going to see him that week. 

She’d been hesitant, worried that he wouldn't actually want to see her, that he had changed his mind, but as soon as she knocked on the door he seemed to be bright and awake. She took that as a good sign. 

Since then, three days have passed. They’d spent the majority of those days together. Spencer was full of questions, full of things that he couldn't remember he’d already told her, his brain never seemed to stop turning, to stop thinking. 

She was used to it. 

Most of the time, she was doing all of the talking. She was telling him about their relationship, about herself, she was telling him about all the things he’d learned about her in the course of five years, she was cramming it all into short sentences, giving up on giving any important details. 

It was exhausting. 

Sometimes, she started to say something, was about to mention something that they'd done together, but she always paused mid-sentence, reminded of the life Spencer had lost, of all of their days together that were lost. 

And other times, Spencer was telling her something, was talking so that she didn't have to, and he mentioned something that she already knew. He mentioned things about his childhood, about the way Derek teased him, the way Penelope was good at making him feel flustered, and she always felt herself wince. Because she already knew all of those things. She knew more things about him than he did, she knew almost everything. And he didn't. 

It was like two strangers talking. 

Except the only stranger in the room was her. 

She wasn't acting like herself. 

She was trying to avoid scaring Spencer, rushing into things, scaring him away from her forever. 

So she didn't act like herself. 

She hid the little details, the tiniest things that she didn't want him to know, she kept them locked away, didn't add them into the stories that he was always asking for. She did it constantly. And to some extent, it felt like lying, it felt like taking something important away from him. But, she also knew how easily overwhelmed her Spencer could get, she knew about all of the things that would scare him. So she didn't feel as bad hiding things from him. 

Derek and Penelope came almost every day. Some days the best they could manage was a call. Cases were taking over, the world not stopping for Spencer, and a couple of times they couldn't get to Spencer quick enough. 

So they called. And every time, Spencer seemed almost uncomfortable. He always asked if Y/N wanted to talk to them, always hesitant, because he didn't know how close all of them were, he didn't know if Y/N would feel pressured by his friends if she even liked them. 

All Spencer knew was there was a pretty girl, a girl he’d once known, sitting in his room. 

Today was like all the other days, Spencer asking questions, this time about their history together. 

Y/N had been looking out the window, daydreaming of a time where she didn't feel like a stranger to her own body. 

Spencer cleared his throat trying to get her attention. 

She looked over to him, her eyes wide and empty, she made a noise of acknowledgment, a sign that he could go on. She watched as he gathered his thoughts, already familiar with the look in his eyes.

 “What did I like about you?”

She paused. Looked away from him. What did he like about her? 

They’d talked about it many times. He’d told her thousands of times how much he loved her. She’d heard it over and over again, felt it pounding in her heart, racing around her head, every day for five years.

It didn’t seem long enough.

She thought about the things he used to compliment. 

“Your eyes. They’re so beautiful. They look like they hold all the secrets of the world.” 

She remembered him running his hands through her hair, moving it so he could see more of her face. She remembered his eyes. She remembered how comfortable they felt. 

“I hope you’ll tell me one day.” he’d said, after minutes of just looking at each other. 

“Tell you what?” she whispered, ducking her head down into his chest. 

He hadn’t answered. They both fell asleep. 

She thought of the time he told her she would look beautiful in anything. 

“It doesn’t matter to me what you wear. You’re perfect to me, always.” 

After that, he never stopped telling her that. 

“You’re perfect to me.”

“You’re perfect for me.”

“You’re perfect with me.”

“Always.”

For a moment, she wished she could hear it again. 

She removed that thought from her head almost as soon as it entered. She forced it away, locking it into her cage, somewhere deep in her body, where it wouldn’t be found again. 

She shouldn’t be thinking about things like that. 

“I think you liked that I was so open to learning new things. There wasn’t anything I wouldn’t listen to you say.” 

Spencer contemplated that. He thought of all the people that asked him to stop talking, told him that it was too much, too far. 

She was probably right. 

But that seemed like a silly reason for him to love her. 

He finally nodded, accepting her answer. 

And then the nurse came in. 

And she had to leave 

 ***

Later that week, it was time for Spencer to go home.

It was time for both of them to go home since Y/N had refused to leave without him, even when he’d woken up. 

She was nervous.

She didn’t want him to know she was nervous.

They’d been living together for almost two years, together they had picked out an apartment, one that both of them had loved. They’d spent every day they had together, when they were both home, in their tiny apartment. She didn’t know what Spencer now would think about it. He’d lost all memories of it, lost all of their shared moments at home together, and when he’d asked about his apartment, the one he’d had five years ago, Y/N didn’t know what to say. 

He’d given up that apartment for her. 

He didn’t have any place to live beside their apartment. 

She smiled at him when he asked and told him about apartment searching, about how he was sure to get the safest apartment they could find. 

“We need it Y/N.” he’d whined when she refused to get the one apartment he deemed safest- because it came with a double lock and no balcony -she’d only smiled at him, kissing his nose and walking away. 

Eventually, she’d caved in. Spencer didn’t seem to like any other apartments after that one. 

After she was done sharing the story, done trying to remind him who he was supposed to be, he smiled nervously at her. 

She knew he was uncomfortable. She knew that he didn’t want to live in a brand new place, with a strange girl who he was supposed to be in love with. 

In his mind, they’d only known each other for two days, in his mind, she wasn’t anything special. In his mind, it was weird to live with someone you’d only just met.

Y/N didn’t know how to make him feel more comfortable. 

She tried to remind herself that it would take time, that it had taken time when they’d first moved in, that it would take time again. 

She didn’t want time. 

She wanted Spencer. 

She ignored that. Instead, she spent her time making sure she had all the proper medical equipment at their apartment. She spent the moments she wasn’t with Spencer online, looking for different things that could make a broken leg, a forgotten five years, easier. 

She also looked for things to prevent the pain she felt every time she moved. She didn’t want to breathe out smoke every time she tried to speak, tried to breathe. 

So far she hadn’t found anything. Her doctor recommended pain medication, told her about all the drugs that could help her. 

She refused to listen. 

She didn’t even know why. 

And now it had been more than a month since the accident, and they were finally going home. 

Together. 

She helped Spencer sign all his release papers, reminding him where he lived, what his phone number was, who they could call in case of emergency. 

She helped him and then it was time to go. It was time to go. 

They walked side by side out of the hospital, Spencer enjoyed the air outside, enjoyed something that didn’t feel like the stale walls of the hospital he’d been locked up in. Y/N looked back at the hospital. Almost longingly. Almost as if she wanted to go back. She wouldn’t feel as nervous as she did if they were still in the hospital. 

She brought him to her car. Helped him get in. They both smiled at each other awkwardly. 

The ride home was silent. Neither of them spoke a word. Spencer spent the time looking out the window, observing the drive he couldn’t remember, watching the world pass him by. Y/N avoided looking at him. She avoided looking at anything. She drove and she tried to remind herself that everything was fine. They were both going to be fine. 

By the time they got there, to the tiny apartment, both of them had only managed to rack up more nerves. 

“This is it.” Y/N said, getting out of the car, trying to keep her face calm, her body comfortable, to go help Spencer get out of the car. 

She showed him the way to the elevator. Listed out all of their neighbors that lived on the first floor. 

“This is Mrs. Hankel’s apartment. She loves you. She hates me.” she said as she passed by a door. 

It was the first laugh they shared all day. 

As they walked Spencer looked back at the door longingly. 

When they finally arrived at the door Spencer looked down at the welcome mat, laughing a little.

The mat, brown and boring, with a barely notice scrip at the bottom reading 

“shoes off, fuckers” 

Spencer looked back up at Y/N to see her laughing with him. They were getting closer, the invisible wall keeping them apart seemed to disappear for a moment. 

“Why do we-?” he asked, chuckling as he watched her smile. 

He could see the way she lit up, the life that had joined her eyes, he could see the immediate difference in her body just by looking at the mat. 

“You kept pestering me about a welcome mat,” she laughed, shaking her head and looking up at Spencer. “But Y/N '' she imitated him, “Studies have shown that most toxic chemicals that end up inside a person's home are tracked in by their shoes. A doormat would stop that-'' she giggled, her words fading. “You just wouldn’t give it up. Eventually, we had to compromise.” she ended, pointing her hand at the mat and smiling at him. 

It was her first real smile. 

Spencer felt dazed. 

But, almost as quick as it was there, it disappeared, fading off her face, her eyes becoming stone again. 

The wall was back up. 

She reminded herself not to overwhelm him, not to do anything that would be too much. She never wanted to be too much for him. He needed help, not her emotions. 

She was still reminding herself of that as they walked in the doors. 

Spencer looked around and he saw some things that he didn't really understand, like the art hanging up on the wall, the candles that seemed to rest on every empty space, the delicate paintings on the walls. But as he looked around he saw things that he did understand. He saw the textbooks, the bookshelves that occupied all the walls, and when Y/N told him that he was free to walk around, to look around, he saw all of his books placed on the bookshelves littering the apartment. He walked around and noticed all the tattered old copies that he had bought at second-hand bookstores, he saw the first edition books everyone always seemed to give, he looked around and he remembered all the books. He also saw new books, ones that he couldn't imagine reading without some persuasion. He saw old romance, new romance, he saw young adults and dystopian, he saw cookbooks, self-help books, and he laughed a little at the thought of reading any of them. 

Those were so obviously Y/N’s. 

“We have a lot of books.” he heard her say behind him, and he turned to see her standing watching him, observing him looking around. He wondered why he hadn't noticed her before. 

He smiled at her, hoping that she wasn't bothered by him snooping around. 

“Did I bring some of my books here?” he asked, turning back to look at all the books he remembered. 

“Yes. Not all of them, I needed a little bit of room. But most of them are yours.” she smiled, her face still tense, still frozen solid. 

She turned to go, wanting Spencer to look around without her hovering over him. 

She walked into the kitchen to make them something for lunch, feeling the pain circle her lungs. She thought of the medication she could be taking right now, thought of the relief her body would feel, she thought about the pain, the writhing pain that lived inside her. 

The pain on her lungs was nothing. 

The pain on her lungs, on her ribs, in her chest, felt like pain medication. 

It felt like nothing compared to- 

She paused. She let her thoughts drift off, let her body become aware again, let herself turn to stone, let everything drain out of her. 

This pain was nothing. 

She was strong enough to deal with a little pain. 

She continued to make lunch, continued to not think of anything, to only think of essential things, such as where she would sleep. How she would show Spencer their bedroom, show him where he kept all stuff. 

She thought about showing him which shampoos were his, why he enjoyed them so much. He thought about showing him the clothes she’d been buying him for years, the clothes he used to tell her he felt at home in. She thought about showing him the photo album they had made together, Spencer mostly watching, as a present for their third anniversary. She thought about showing him how to lock the door, how to make sure their security system wouldn't start blaring when they left the house. 

She had so much to teach him. 

There were so many lost memories. 

And finally, when she was about to let it go, about to forget about all the things she needed to do, Spencer walked in. 

The pain she felt just looking at him- 

Breathe in. 

“Hey. See everything?” she asked, a perfect, practiced smile on her face. 

Spencer smiled back, politely. “Yeah. Did you decorate?” 

She laughed, the feeling burning her lungs. “You helped me choose the colors,” she said reassuringly as if she was worried he was going to be upset as if she knew how this stranger would react as if she knew him-

Spencer nodded, looking solemnly at the floor. 

“So I was thinking-” Y/N started, only to be interrupted by Spencer. 

‘When can I-” he started, looking up at her sheepishly. “Sorry,” he muttered smiling at her. She nodded, her face cold as ice, nodding for him to continue. “I was wondering when I could get my stuff?” he continued, softer this time. 

She paused, her hands frozen, her face still poised, but her heart racing at his words. 

“Get your stuff?” she asked softly, trying not to let her voice shake. 

“Yeah,” he responded easily. “I asked JJ and she said I could stay at her house. At least until I can get a new apartment-” 

Y/N had stopped listening. 

She wasn't listening. 

Spencer wasn't staying. 

He wasn't.

He was. 

He was leaving. 

She felt her insides freeze, ice hitting every inch of her body, keeping her stuck, stuck in her head, stuck to the floor, stuck with the pain building, building up inside her. 

She nodded, robotically. 

Spencer said something else, something about her showing him where his clothes were. 

She wasn't listening, she refused to listen, she wasn't listening. 

Her body responded though. 

She led Spencer through their living room, showed him where the bathroom was just in case, she led them into their bedroom, her eyes avoiding his, her heart avoiding beating. 

She watched as he looked around their room, examined the bed, the small desk hiding in the corner, the dresser on the opposite side of the room. She pointed to the closet. Pointed and left the room.

She wasn't listening. 

She sat down on the couch, staring ahead of her, not listening, not feeling, nothing. She sat there, sat there, and listened. She wasn't listening. She felt close to falling asleep. 

She waited for him to come back. 

Leaving. 

Come back. 

Always. 

He walked back into the room, holding a bag, holding one of their bags. He smiled at her as he zipped it up, as he locked all his clothes up, as he got ready to leave. 

“Thank you,” he said, clueless to the feeling burying itself into her chest. “Thank you for driving me here. JJ’s coming to pick me up soon.” 

Her ears perked up at that. Confused when JJ had known to come over when Spencer had gotten a hold of her. 

He must’ve seen the question in her eyes because he answered “Garcia showed me how to use my phone.” 

She nodded. Her lips pursed, her eyes cloudy, her face void of anything, void of emotion, void of color. 

Spencer looked at her and tilted his head, he thought he noticed something different, thought that if he was trying to be a good boyfriend, the boyfriend she’d had a month ago, he would’ve asked, he would’ve done something. 

Spencer didn't know her. 

He stood there, staring at her, her eyes void, not acknowledging his staring, and they both waited, just waited until there was a knock on the door. 

They both looked over. 

Spencer looked back at Y/N. He smiled, his hands awkwardly placed in front of himself. He smiled at her, and she smiled back. 

He started walking to the door, looked back to her, said 

“Thank you. I see you soon.” 

And then he was gone. 

He was gone. 

He was gone. 

Come back. Come back come back come back come back come back. 

Her head was chanting at her, telling her what to do, telling her what she shouldn't do, telling her too many things at once. Her head was chanting at her. Over and over, chanting chanting. 

She looked up at the ceiling. 

Always. 

Always. 

Always wasn't real. 

Always was a lie. 

Always. 

She looked back down, felt the pain fill her fingertips, felt the pain cloud her head, a storm forming above her. She felt it invade her heart, invade her bones, her muscles, felt the pain swimming in her veins, swimming everywhere in her body, she felt the pain the pain the pain. 

Her face was nothing, her face was empty, it was empty 

Her body wasn't. 

She sobbed. 

She sobbed for the pain, for the pain that was everywhere, for the medication she wished she’d taken, for the life that she didn't have, for the life, for her life, for her memory, for everything. She sobbed, and she sobbed. 

She fell to the floor. 

She let herself fall apart. 

She sobbed. 

Always. 

It was just a little pain.

***

They saw each other twice a week after that. 

Spencer went back to work. 

Y/N stayed home. She worked from there.

She let the loneliness cloud her brain. 

She let herself dream of the words that weren't there. 

She never told Spencer. 

***

“Where do you work?” 

“I teach second grade. Earlier this year I decided to take a year off. We were going to do some traveling and I didn't want to be gone for too long. I’m an artist at heart though.” She teased. 

Her face was stone. Her voice was warm. 

Spencer smiled. 

***

“Did you ask me to be your boyfriend?”

“It was more of a mutual thing. I was spending the night at your apartment, right after we had gotten back from one of those old movies you like, and you asked if I was your girlfriend, if I wanted to meet your family. I just agreed, told you I’d already told my Mom you were my boyfriend. You laughed.”

She smiled at him. Sipped her coffee. 

Spencer nodded along. 

***

“What's your family like?” 

“Well, my parents love you. So does my sister. My brother likes to pretend you don't exist. You used to be okay with that. I’m in the middle. But I’m the favorite.” 

She bragged. 

She sat there. She watched him. 

He looked off behind her. 

***

“Did we have a favorite place?” 

“We used to spend a lot of time at the park. We loved the park. You always beat me at chess, cause I told you to stop letting me win. You didn't like that very much. But mostly we just sat and talked at the park. You always liked going there after a hard case.” 

Spencer didn't say a word. 

The park. 

***

“When did you meet the team?” 

“A year after. You didn't want to rush anything. You wanted your secrets. But I loved them before I knew them. You’d praised them so much I don't know how I couldn't have liked them. Penelope and I clicked. She became my best friend. We bonded over always staying home. You loved that we were so close. Sometimes you forced me out of the house to spend time with her.” 

Nothing. 

***

“When did I first tell you I loved you?” 

She paused. 

She didn't want to answer that question. 

She didn't want the reminder, the constant, consistent reminder of how much Spencer used to love her. He used to love her. 

He used to. 

“It was four months into our relationship. You blurted it out while I was sitting on your lap, watching you read. We were close then. You apologized after. I never had a doubt, I said it right back. ��I love you.’” 

And she said it so he knew. She said it so she could rebuild the memory. 

She said it to help him remember. 

She said it because it was easy. 

She loved him. 

He used to. 

***

It was Wednesday. 

It was a Wednesday, almost a month since they’d gotten home. 

Since she’d been home. 

Since Spencer had moved out. 

It had been almost a month. 

They’d been getting to know each other for almost a month now. 

Spencer was coming over. 

It was the first time Spencer had asked to come over. Since he’d first gotten his stuff, the first day he left the hospital, since then he had moved out completely, had taken most of his stuff, the things he wanted. He’d been inviting Y/N to coffee, they spent at least one day a week together if he was home. 

She was talking to Penelope more. Checking up on him through her instead of directly asking him. She didn't want to be too overwhelming. 

It had been a month of being with him from afar. 

She was doing fine. 

Her wounds had completely healed. She’d gotten a good report from her doctor, and she was doing fine. 

She was doing fine. 

Spencer was coming over. 

He was coming over for the first real-time. And this time he had asked if he could come over, said he wanted to talk to her. 

She let her heart bubble for a moment. Let herself imagine Spencer living in her house again. 

She stopped herself before it got too far. 

She would do nothing to ruin the progress they had made. 

She waited at home, she waited and got herself ready. She prepared herself for talking to him, for not saying too much, for saying just the right amount. She prepared herself to see him again. To be in love with him while he watched. 

She waited for him. 

She turned herself to stone when he knocked on the door. 

She opened it, smiling at him and letting him in. 

He walked in, his body was tense, his eyebrows were furrowed, and his eyes were scrunched in concentration. Y/N tried not to stare at him, to stare at the familiarity in the face. He looked like her Spencer for a moment. 

She kept the smile on her face. 

“Did you need to talk about something?” she asked, she asked and she got him a bottle of water, needing to preoccupy her hands with something, with anything, just to keep the smile on her face. 

She didn't want him to see through the cracks in her foundation. 

She needed to be perfect for him. 

For him. 

You’re perfect to me. 

Always. 

She waited for him to speak. 

“I think… I think I’ve been doing something wrong,” he said after a moment, looking down at the floor, guilty like he had just made a huge confession. 

“Something wrong?” she asked, her face almost moving, almost breaking. 

Not quite. 

Spencer looked up at her. Looked into her eyes. Really looked. He looked for a girl, a girl he might’ve known, a girl that he would remember. He looked, he looked, and he couldn't see anything. She was still just the girl he had first seen, still just a person, someone he didn't know. He looked once more. 

Nothing. 

“I think I was wrong.” 

She looked back at him, looked into her eyes, the eyes that she actually knew. 

They looked so sad. 

“W-wrong?” She stuttered out, her eyes moving in concern, breaking. Spencer was never wrong. 

“Do you know who I am?” Spencer asked. His face was unmoving like he already knew the answer. 

“You’re Spencer. You're my-” she swallowed, climbing over the words. “You’re my friend.” 

Spencer looked at her. He shook his head, ignoring the panic in her eyes. “No. Do you know who I am?” 

“I-”

“Because I don't know who you are.” 

Y/N closed her mouth. She looked in his eyes, scared by the harsh tone, scared by the words. She looked at him and she didn't see her look. He wasn't looking at her like he loved her. He hadn't looked at her like that in mon- 

“I don't know who you are Y/N. I thought I might-” he paused, baffled at his past self. “I thought I might remember you. But I don't. To me, you are just a girl I met three months ago.” 

She stared at him. 

Just a girl just a girl just a girl- 

This pain was a memory that would never go away- 

“I don't think I’ll remember you. I think this was a mistake.” He said. Final. Unmoving. 

She felt stuck to the ground. 

Stuck in place, stuck to the pain clinging to her. 

“M-mistake?” she said, the words forced out of her mouth. Her body was shaking like she was freezing, she couldn't imagine not feeling pain, she couldn't imagine not knowing Spencer, she knew Spencer she knew him she knew him. 

“I think we were only fooling each other by hoping.”  

Hope. 

Hope wasn't a word in her vocabulary. Hope didn't exist in a world where Spencer didn't love her. Hope wasn't a thing, hope wasn't available. Hope. Didn't. Exist. 

Hope. 

What was hope? 

“I think we need to stop. I don't want to hurt you.” Spencer said. His voice wasn't familiar. His face wasn't familiar. 

Did she know him? 

“I don't think we should do this anymore.” 

Anymore. 

Not anymore. 

Always. 

Not always. 

Pain glued her eyes glued her mouth shut. 

“I’m sorry Y/N.” 

She watched him, frozen in place as he walked out the door. 

She didn't know what he was thinking. She didn't know that Spencer did care, that Spencer had seen her once, that she came in glimpses. She didn't know that Spencer could see how much he was hurting her, how much spending time with him was destroying him. 

She didn't see that he was trying to give her a clean break. 

One that would hurt less. 

She didn't know any of that. She only watched him pull her heart out of her chest, grab it, take it away from her, she watched as he threw it around. 

She watched as he crumbled it. 

He had said always. 

***

There was a cloud in his head. 

A cloud hanging over him, a cloud proving his world to be dark, to be covered in nothing but the dark clouds that surrounded him. 

There was a cloud hung over his head. 

The sun had disappeared. 

Oh. 

The clouds swirled around him. 

He got dizzy with realization. 

The sun. 

His world titled.

Oh 

***

my masterlist here

yes yes! its not over yet. but i hope you enjoyed. and understood. and i hope i didnt ruin your day with my writing.

final part here

[shy-poet-marvel]

Mind and Heartache

Peter Parker X Male reader

Author’s Note : Hey guys, haven't post a story in a while so here you go. 

Summary : Someone attacked Peter. You, his boyfriend with telepathic/telekinetic powers must found out who

Warning : Male!reader, angst, reader focused, mention of blood and some broken bone

Word Count : 2887

Inspired by @bigfan-fanfic​​

Gif by : @sincerelysaraahh​

*Want to request something? Just ask!*

*Constructive criticism are welcome*

One of Peter’s hand is clutching the side of his stomach while the other one is prompted against a wall, both are covered in blood. ‘How many ribs did I break?’ Peter wondered, ‘three, four, or maybe even six?’, it feels all the same to him, his whole body hurt. He limped across the dark alleyway, ‘what matter is he already send his distress signal, they will come soon’, Peter’s thought was interrupted by that cold and ruthless sound. “Itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout, down came the rain and washed the spider out”

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Y/N)’s body was backed up against the wall in front of the bed, which Peter’s body lies lifeless in. Machinery surrounds him and tubes are coming out of his mouth, the morning sun still makes him look ethereal, but now is not the kind that you admire. His brain activity was low, too low. Wanda managed to intervene and stabilize his mind, but it almost like he’s gone, like a faint whisper just out of your earshot while loud noises enveloped his soft cries.

“He got jumped on by someone, someones, the crime scene was very contaminated by other variables that aren’t important, so combing through it will take a long time. Unfortunately, all of the Avengers were on a mission, so the ones that were able to respond were standard S.H.I.E.L.D agents”, normally when Tony Stark is addressing you, you should pay close attention, but now, all you cared about is who did this to your Peter.

“No use, it’s all blurry and disoriented, I’m guessing he had a lot to process when it happened. Trust me (Y/N), I’ve tried”, Wanda said out loud before you even try reading through his mind and the thought of Wanda poking through Peter’s mind makes you sick to your stomach, but if she can’t do it, in your condition right now, you cant do it too. “We’re doing our best to keep him alive, we’ll keep you updated, now go home (Y/N). You need to rest”

“All right”, you said reluctantly. The door to Peter’s room, your mind is made up.

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Can I have latte and that chocolate brownies?”

“Do you want to have the brownies re-heated?”

“Yes, please”, you then gave your card to pay for your order.

You sat across the window, looking at the stream of human going about their day. One are excited for their first date, while another are scared because they broke their new phone. Still not the one you’re looking for.

“Here’s your order”, the waitress sat down a vanilla latte with a love drawn on it and a warm chocolate brownies.

“Thank you”, you smiled at her and then continue searching.

This is another café you have visited in the last couple of hours. You aren't used to this amount of caffeine even though you usually like coffee. Another latte you order to drink on the go. It was a nice day out actually. The setting sun lay a golden hue to the city as you walked along its block, sipping on your coffee occasionally while walking back to Peter’s apartment. Aunt May was kind enough to let you stay at Peter’s room when he’s still in the hospital and unable to be visited. To show your gratitude for her you are the one who did all the cleaning and the chores.

After arriving at the apartment you started doing the laundry, with May’s shift and Peter at the ward no one is there to do it. While waiting for the laundry you decided to cook something, with the groceries you bought at a nearby deli. You prepped all the ingredients that you need, thinking about what you should make and decided on meatballs, macaroni, and cheese with cuts of smoked beef, a soup, and some fried rice. When all is done you eat the leftover pizza that’s on the fridge accompanied by some of the meatballs you cooked. You put all that’s left in containers and put a note on the table that states May’s dinner, breakfast, and lunch are all in the fridge and only needed to be re-heated. You spent sometime after dinner ironing and folding the clothes that are out of the dryer before you went to bed, with your nose buried in his sweater.

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I need to tell the Avenger about this", Peter muttered under his breath while climbing down the side of the building he is on. He only managed a few feet of swinging before he fell. He was shot at the right side of his abdomen. His back slam against the concert of the silent part of town.

 One of Peter’s hand is clutching the side of his stomach while the other one is prompted against a wall, both are covered in blood. ‘How many ribs did I break?’ Peter wondered, ‘three, four, or maybe even six?’, it feels all the same to him, his whole body hurt. He limped across the dark alleyway, ‘what matter is he already send his distress signal, they will come soon’, Peter’s thought was interrupted by that cold and ruthless sound. “Itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout, down came the rain and washed the spider out”

"You can break my bone, hurt me, beat me up, even kill me, but for the love of God and all things good, do not hurt him", Peter said as intimidating as he could.

The man stood in silence before continuing the rhyme, "out came the sun, and dried up all the rain, and the itsy-bitsy spider founded dead. The end"

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning when you woke up you have a massive headache, like every brain cell that you have is on fire and just ready to explode ‘maybe this is the side effect of over-exerting your power’, you thought, you never really use your power to this much capacity over the last few days. You barely get into the kitchen without falling, when you hear a knock on the door. Trying your best to read who it is, but failed, like someone is blocking you or because when you did it your whole body hurts. With the last bit of your power, you took one of the kitchen knives and dragged yourself to the door. Your vision was hazy so you didn’t know who it was through the peephole.

“Who is it?”, you mustered up every ounce of power that you had to sounded normal.

“It’s us”, you opened the door to Wanda and Natasha.

You let them in and you guys talked about Peter’s condition, he’s getting better, slowly but surely, his physical condition is getting stable by the day, but still can’t be visited. You sigh in relief, it was the best news you heard all week.

“You know that we are doing our best to investigate who did this to Peter”, Natasha spoked softly.

Shocked because you know that she sounded like she knew what you’ve been doing before you ready to blame Wanda on reading your mind Natasha spoked. “I was a spy for most of my life, it’s not hard to read what you’ve been doing with just a few glance”.

So you talked more about how the investigation has been going, you also told them what you already find. Before they leave Natasha spoke, “I’ve been there you know, wanting revenge, it was never the answer, never will. I’m not your mom, so I can't tell you what to do or not to do, what I can tell you is be careful and you're not in this alone”, she gave you a button and then leave.

Your grumbling stomach requests your attention before anything else, so you head to the kitchen once again. May left a thank you note on the fridge, opening it you see that May finished the soup, some of the fried rice, and brought the meatballs for her lunch. You eat what’s left of the fried rice in silence, wondering what to do. You decided on taking a shower before doing anything else. After getting out of the shower you went into Peter’s room to put on some clothes. With a black Nasa sweatshirt that you have and black sweatpants, you went out. The first couple of hours wasn’t productive because your powers were still acting up, your head still feels like it was going to explode, but not as bad as it was in the morning. Without you realized it was noon already. With some sandwiches and bottled water, you take your lunch in the near park bench. Eating alone again while watching people go about their day. After you threw away the trash in the garbage can nearby, you walked around the small park. Seeing a tree you decided to sit on it. Without realizing you drifted off.

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was supposed to be just a normal patrol, maybe catch some muggers, web some burglars, and maybe, just maybe prevent a heist. But this, this is above his power, how much Peter doesn’t want it to be.

“The plans are going smoothly, I presumed”, a man in black tuxedo spoke.

“Yes, we’ve already found out his patterns, his associates, people that are close to him, and most importantly, his ties to our friendly, neighborhood spider”, a man in a hooded robe answer.

Peter was shocked, who could this group of people are. Targeting him, or the people around him. They noticed Peter was eavesdropping on the conversation.

“There he is our little spider, gracing us with his presence”, the man in the black tuxedo announced. Peter can feel guns pointing at him.

“If you do anything to me, the Avengers will know about it”, Peter shouted while pushing his distress signal.

“ The world doesn’t just revolve around you or your little Avenger friend”, the man in the black tuxedo smiled coldly.

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You got woken up by the rough wind. Unlike the other day, today seemed to be a gloomy one. The clouds are rolling in heavily, it’s going to rain, hard. You were only a couple of blocks away before it rained like cats and dogs. Entering Peter’s apartment, you were soaked to the bone. To your surprise, May was home, in the middle of the day.

“Oh my god (y/n) go dry up and change into some other clothes, I’ll make some tea”, she pushed you into Peter’s room. Wearing his sweater and some short, you put the wet clothes on the dryer before you sat down in the living room, next to May.

She offered you some hot tea to warm you up. “The hospitals let me leave early, Meg cover the rest of my shift for today, fortunately, I got home before it was raining”, she looked to you while you sipping on the comforting tea.

“Before I got home I visited Peter in the hospital, maybe you were there. I was planning on taking you to an ice cream shop or something, thanking you for doing so many chores for these past few days”, sadness sipped out of her every word.

“But when I arrived at Peter’s room I didn’t find you anywhere. He’s still can’t be visited but I was hoping you were waiting outside. I was ready on looking for you in the hospital. That’s when Natasha came to me and said that you never visited Peter since the day he was admitted”, she looked at you, stared at you with tears pooling in her eyes.

“What have you been doing these past few days (y/n)?”, May asked a question you don’t dare answer.

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You were ecstatic, you finally find a lead on who attacked Peter. You told Natasha and here you are on an impromptu Avengers meeting.

“I didn’t get much since it was outside of my range. All I got was the named Jack O’ Riley, something about Project Liberation, and the code name ‘Sound’, you spoke to the one present, which is Tony, Wanda, Natasha, Clint, and Bruce.

“Jack O’ Riley, somehow that named seemed familiar”, Bruce spoke.

“Because it is, he worked with HYDRA before, we come across his name couple of times, we didn’t what role he play, until now”, Natasha spoked.

“Where were you when you find this out (y/)?”, Tony asked.

“I was just on the outside of Queens, maybe they’re in Brooklyn?”, you answered.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y you know what to do, let’s get to work guys, double time”, announced Tony.

“We will find those who did this to him and we will bring them to justice”, Wanda reassured you.

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You sneak around the abandoned warehouse, using your power to hide your presence, but you still need to walk quietly. You stepped into the abandoned warehouse through the broken window on the top and slowly glide down to the behind a container.

You wanted to sneak around but someone announced your presence, “Finally, we’ve been waiting for you”.

Knowing your cover is blown you stopped hiding your presence and got out of the backside of the container, “you must be a telepath, being able to sense my presence like that, I know I should've concealed my presence more”.

You saw a man with a black tuxedo standing there, the darkness behind him. He stood with the support of a walking cane.

“Why did you target Spiderman?”, you shouted, knowing this man right here was the one that’s behind Peter’s attack.

“Peter was never our goal”, he smiled before snapping his fingers, and you were bombarded by a barrage of bullets from all sides.

You didn’t have time to wonder how you didn’t sense any man or machine inside the warehouse expect the one in front of you right now. You created a force field with your telekinetic powers. Minutes went by and they didn’t show any sign of stopping, you mustered up some power to produce a shock wave, stopping the rain of bullets.

“Marvelous, marvelous, you’re better than we expected”, the man in the black tuxedo clapped his hands.

You were astounded, with that blast he should've been sent flying, but he’s still standing with nothing on him. A hooded figure shows up next to him, but since when you should've felt them but you got nothing like it was dead.

“Where are my manners, my name is Jack O’ Riley and this is my sweet Nathan”, you were flown back to the stack of old crates as soon as he finished talking, thanks to your telekinesis you were able to soften the blow.

You saw him leaping to you, so you throw some of the broken crates to him before you doges his attack. You rested you back to a container before you can react he already got you pinned.

“You see, Nathan here is a telepath, but his power was weak. Until we figure out a way to take the telepathic and telekinetic ability of another just like him, the price is the person that we take their ability from died. Peter was a setup, we did want to kidnap him before that damned agents storm the place, but I guess by breaking a few of his bone did well enough to bring you here”, Jack said that as he walked to you.

“The sound of his bone when it cracked, the way he practically begged to spare you life, he was pathetic. You should've seen his face”, Nathan dumped images of Peter on the ground, the pain he felt, the fear that consumed him, the readiness to die to save you.

It makes you mad, enrage, furious. All of that anger you channeled into your power, it manifests by creating a big shock wave, big enough to destroy the warehouse. You can still see Nathan and Jack still breathing, badly wounded but still breathing, maybe Nathan tried to shield them both but it was only enough to let them on the brink of death. No matter what, more fun for you.

You lifted them up and then smashed them on the ground, “Did you feel that that’s what my Peter feel when you shot him down”.

You started to break their bones, “Do you like it when it’s you bones that are being broken?”, one by one, starting from their arms you break them.

“(Y/N)! Stop this! Please, I’m begging you”, you heard his voice. A voice soft as the sunrise but now is filled with pain and hurt. ‘Who dare hurt his Peter?’ you thought before you realize that most of the Avengers are around with Peter. You saw him there, standing, healthy, safe and sound, and afraid of you. You dropped down slowly, with two of you victims that are quickly being taken care of by the medic team.

You walked slowly to Peter, your Peter, that’s here, not in a hospital bed, with machinery around him. You only manage a few steps before falling, but not to the cold, hard, ground. The soft, warm, arms of your boyfriend are the one that breaks it.

“There, there, (y/n) everything is going to be all right, no need to cry”, Peter said to your eyes, whipping away the tears you didn’t know you have. He places a comforting kiss inside of his warm hug. You felt it was only you two in this world.

[illfoandillfie]

5 Simple Rules For A Successful Fake Relationship: The Perfect Date

5 SIMPLE RULES MASTERLIST

Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader

Summery: There's trouble in paradise for you and Ben but will the distance bring about some revelations? And what does it mean for your romantic reunion?

Warnings: The usual fairly innocent stuff, some swearing and drinking and mentions of smoking, but with the additions of PDAs out the wazoo, public make out, private make out.

Words: 8093

A/N: Things get a lil spicy in this one! Small disclaimer that I don’t drink so I have no idea what wine does to someone, or two someones who split a bottle. Also just another reminder that this was in no way inspired by rumours regarding Ben’s rl relationship with Olivia Cooke. I believe they’re legit, and I will not engage with anyone about that topic. 

Taglist:  @laedymoon  @dtfrogertaylor  @vee-ndetta @atomic-watermelon @kellypenac @labessieisallama @deakyclicks @jennyggggrrr @drowseoftaylor  @hannafuckingsucks  @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming @queenmylovely @supersonicfreddie @tenement-funstah

@coni-martina @johndeaconshands @hardforbenhardy @cubedtriangle​ @vicouscirce​ @arianabrashierstuff​

You headed straight to the bathroom and threw up. Ben had called twice on your way home, but you’d let it go to voicemail, not ready to hear him admonish you for eavesdropping on him or to be asked if you felt the same. You supposed it was adrenaline or something that was making you feel nauseous. Of course, you’d have to talk to him eventually, at least to apologise for going so off book, but it could wait until you weren’t feeling so miserable. With teary eyes, you made your way to the kitchen, grabbed a drink to help settle your stomach, and then flopped onto the couch to flick through TV channels until you found something distracting enough. Your phone rang again but when you glanced at the screen it wasn’t Ben’s name you saw. “Mary?” If she heard any evidence of your distress in your voice she didn’t mention it, “Brilliant performance Y/N. The video was tweeted out about ten minutes after you left the restaurant and it’s already been shared more than you’d believe.” “Oh, that’s good.” “Better than good. People are eating it up. There’ll be articles tomorrow predicting your breakup and not just the ones we’ve organised. We’re going to ask that you and Ben refrain from seeing each other in public for the next two weeks or so, make it look like you’re taking some time apart. That’ll give the video plenty of time to circulate and allow us to get out a few variations of the trouble in paradise story. Of course, you’re free to visit each other and speak over the phone but be wary in case other paparazzi start following you in addition to the one’s we’ve hired. Chances are more people will be looking to scoop the official breakup story if all goes as well as these early numbers indicate it will. Then we’ll hit them with the romantic makeup dinner at Boucher. And after that it’s back to playing the happy couple. Of course there’ll be the press junket and premiere in a couple of months’ time and then we can break you up for good.” She kept talking about plans for he press tour, something about flights and hotels, but you stopped paying attention, already getting twitter open and searching for the video. It didn’t take long to find it, the caption proclaiming he who’d caught the footage had noticed you and Ben arrive and had pulled out his camera as soon as he realised things weren’t particularly happy. “Sorry, Mary, I’m gonna have to call you back.” “Everything alright?” “Yeah, just a small mishap with the washing machine. I’ll talk to you later.” As soon as she was gone you pressed play on the video. Filmed from a table to the left of yours and slightly behind your shoulder, the phone tipped at an angle so it wouldn’t be spotted. Your heart pounded as you watched. It was all there, the tension thick enough to cut with a knife as Ben tried to draw you into conversation. You heard the bite in your tone, the confusion in his. And you saw what you’d not noticed in the moment. The way his face fell when you said it was too much. The way his nails dug into his palm as he clutched his fork so tightly. The hurt on his face when you called him clingy and needy. He stood up as you walked away but he didn’t follow, just dragged his hand through his hair and then sat down heavily, worrying at his thumbnail with his teeth. The waiter came over, presumably with the bill but the video cut out before anything more was said. They’d got what they wanted. They didn’t need the aftermath.

The next day there was an unexpected knock on your door. You put down your phone where you were watching the video again and peeked out the window, worried that it was Ben come to confront you. Instead you saw Felicity raise her fist and knock again. “I saw the video,” was the first thing she said when you let her in, “are you okay?” “I wish people would stop asking me that. I’m fine.” “You had a straight up cat fight in the middle of a restaurant, and there are paparazzi practically camping in your front yard, you’re not fine.” “Okay, maybe not fine fine. But it’s whatever. How many are out there?” “Three. But what happened? Last week you told me you weren’t going to break up.” “We haven’t broken up.” “Well then what was that?” “I don’t know. It’s been building for a bit I guess. He’s just more serious about it all than I am.” “So I heard. Are you sure you aren’t just panicking?” “Panicking about what?” “Well, y’know, you’ve been in the tabloids a bit lately. That must put a strain on things. Maybe you just got a little freaked out by it and pushed Ben away rather than let yourself be vulnerable,” “What are you my shrink?” “Hey, I’m just trying to help.” “Yeah well, you’re wrong. The paps are kind of annoying but they aren’t the problem. The problem…” you took a breath as you considered what was safe to say, “the problem is that Ben has been on a different page to me for a while now. I think we both just need some space.” “Okay, if that’s what you want to go with,” she clearly didn’t believe you, “Have you talked to him about it?” “Not yet. Figured I’d call back sometime today when my head was clearer.” She nodded, “Well, I’m here for you. Whatever you need. Moral support when you call him or someone to bitch to afterwards or just somebody to get drunk with.” She pulled you into a hug, squeezing you tight and for a moment you felt like you might cry. All you could think about was Ben’s expression when you walked out, how wounded he looked.

Felicity stayed with you for the rest of the day which was good because her presence stopped you from doing nothing but watching the video over and over again. As it was you found it hard to keep yourself from looking at the comments people left on it. A lot of people took Ben’s side, calling you a bitch or worse, sometimes even direct messaging you their opinions. But there were also those lampooning Ben for smothering you, some going so far as to claim they were early signs of manipulative and controlling tendencies and that he deserved the public humiliation of it all. Those were the comments that made you feel worst. Being called a cunt you could deal with. Being told Ben deserved better you could easily deal with. But seeing such horrible suggestions of Ben being thrown about made your heart ache. He wasn’t mean or manipulative. He’d been nothing but kind to everyone on set and especially to you. Any lingering annoyance that hadn’t left you along with the little you’d eaten seemed to melt away, leaving you feeling cold at the thought of what you’d said. Yes he’d been stupid and selfish to agree to pretend to date you when he actually had a crush on you. But not once had he tried to wheedle a confession of love from you, not once had he pushed himself onto you. He’d always been respectful of your boundaries, warned you before he kissed you, asked if you wanted to share a blanket rather than just assume you did. Even your rules he’d mostly stuck to. The one exception being the cutesy nickname, but you’d never put up much of a fight with that. You only knew that he felt something for you because you’d listened in to a private conversation. And really, could you blame him for developing feelings? You’d literally been cast as lovers because you had good chemistry and then you’d spent weeks getting even closer, made all the more necessary by your fake romance. He was hardly the first person in history to have his on-screen feelings transfer to real life. And surely, if he’d decided to tell his friend everything, even after signing contractual documents about keeping it secret, then he must be serious about you, about how much he liked you. Maybe you had it wrong. Maybe there was something there you hadn’t consi-. “Stop wallowing,” Felicities voice cut through your thoughts, “Put the phone down and stop thinking about Ben for five minutes.” You shook your head to clear it, “I’m not wallowing.” “Are you on twitter right now?” “Maybe,” “You’re wallowing. C’mon, give me the phone.” She held out her hand, giving you had no choice but to hand it over. “Has anyone ever told you you’d make a good teacher,” “Once or twice. You can have this,” she brandished your phone at you and then shoved it into her bag, “back when you’re ready to call Ben. Until then we are getting out of the house.” “Out of the house where?” you asked, letting her pull you from your seat. “Just out. You need some fresh air. Go on, get your shoes.” “Alright, alright, I’m going,” you said, with the first genuine chuckle you’d had in days.

You ended up at the park a street over, sitting on a bench overlooking the duckpond. One or two of the photographers followed you, but they were easy to ignore. As soon as you stopped moving your mind was back on the previous night, but Felicity must have sensed as much for she quickly blurted out a fun fact about ducks to distract you. For the rest of the time you were there she kept your mind on other things. She gave you an extended rundown on all the gossip from her workplace. It didn’t matter that you didn’t know who Derick was, you soon heard all about his tryst with the copy boy, and when you asked if the Susie M who was mentioned was the same Susie M that made out with the boss at last year’s Christmas party you heard all about the fallout from her drunk misstep. Felicity led you on a stroll around the pond as you laughed at her stories and filled her in on what you were hoping your next role would be. “I’ve been sent a couple of interesting scripts. There’s one for a sci fi time travel thing which I’m hoping to get a call back for. And there was one for a comedy about a coven of witches causing mayhem with their potions. I’m only about halfway through the script but I’d happily play any of the three lead witches, so I think I’ll have a crack at it.” “They both sound really good. Different to your last role.” “Yeah. Different’s good though.” Eventually you wound your way towards a small coffee shop opposite the far side of the park. The slice of apple tea cake you ordered was the first food you’d eaten since the few bites at dinner and Felicity didn’t let you leave until you’d finished it, though she was subtle in her insistence. When you put your fork down with food still left on the plate she ordered a second coffee for each of you which gave you little to do but keep eating. You thanked her after but she pretended not to know what you were talking about. It wasn’t until you got home again that she returned your phone. “You should call Ben,” “Do I have to?” “Stop pouting and do it. You’re cute together and you obviously love him. Just suck it up and talk to him.” You let out a heavy sigh and then took the phone back, refraining from rolling your eyes at how wrong she was about your feelings.

You headed out onto the back patio and, with some slight trepidation, called Ben. The call rang out. With a frown you headed back inside only to be greeted by Felicity making chicken noises. “I didn’t chicken out, he just didn’t pick up. He must be busy.” “Or he’s upset. Call back. You can come in after he’s not picked up three times or you’ve had a chat.” “Okay, I’ll try again, jeez,” you went back outside and shut the door behind you. Your second attempt was as unsuccessful as your first and you were just about to hang up on the third try when he picked up. “Hello?” “Hi Ben,” “Y/N,” there was none of the joy in his voice that usually accompanied your name. “Can we talk, is now a good time?” “Yeah,” “Okay, I just, uh, I wasn’t sure since you didn’t pick up straight away.” “Well I wouldn’t want to come across as more needy than I already do.” “I shouldn’t have said that,” you leaned against the wall of the house in the same spot you’d seen Ben lean countless times after you’d told him he couldn’t smoke inside, “I’m so so sorry about everything I said.” “It’s not what you said, Y/N. I get it, we had to fight and you let loose. From an acting perspective I’m actually really fucking impressed. I, uh, I might have watched the video when I got home, just once, and it looks legit. Like, that line about pretending to love me as much as I do you.” You held your breath, waiting for him to ask how you knew. “I mean, that’s exactly what we were going for anyway, just without the details of not having met each other’s families. Everyone still heard us argue about moving at different paces and it was some really great improvisation.” “You think so?” “Yeah absolutely. I don’t think I could have come up with a line like that on the fly. Seriously, if we were allowed to tell people it was fake, that would have fit well on your audition reel.” “So you’re not upset with me?” There was a pause as Ben thought about his next words. “Not upset exactly. Like I said, I get that it was a scene. But the way you sounded when you called me clingy….it was pretty clear there were some real feelings in there too and I,” Ben sighed, “I just wish you’d talk to me about how you were feeling beforehand.” “I didn’t really know how.” “But if I’d known that I was making you uncomfortable or coming across as clingy I would have pulled back. I could have texted less or crashed at your place less often. Not insisted on buying you books on our fake dates.” You scuffed your foot against the ground, not sure whether to come clean about overhearing him. You’d expected Ben to have realised by now that you knew, not to take what you’d said as some incredible performance. “I know I got kinda caught up in it all though,” he said before you could summon the courage to admit anything, “I, um, I really like…” You could feel your heart racing, convinced he was about to confess his feelings for you, completely unsure how to react. “…being someone’s boyfriend.” “Oh,” Why was he so determined to surprise you? Why did you feel disappointed? “It suits me. I like having someone to dote on and take care of and talk to and I guess it’s been a while since I properly, seriously dated anyone. I feel like I’ve got all this boyfriend energy stored up and nowhere for it to go. It comes in handy when we’re pretending to be on a date or whatever but sometimes it slips out when we’re just hanging out as friends, without the cameras and all that. Which isn’t an excuse or anything, I’m not trying to undermine any discomfort you felt.” “No, I get it.” “You do?” “Yeah. I mean, we said it was a weird situation right back when it was first pitched to us. That hasn’t really changed, has it?” “No,” he said with a small, soft chuckle, “still weird.” “Exactly. And sometimes I think it can be kind of confusing.” “Confusing?” You had a sudden mental image of a dog with pricked up ears, “Confusing’s maybe the wrong word. Hard to keep up with is I guess what I’m trying to say. It’s different to acting in love with someone on a movie because on a movie there’s a definite time span. The director calls cut and you can stop pretending. But we don’t get that cut. Even when there’s no cameras we’re still faking it for the people we know and anyone who might see us,” you glanced inside to make sure Felicity wasn’t listening in. “Do you think that’s why you didn’t know how to talk to me? Because there’s no clear line between Y/N and Ben as friends and Y/N and Ben as a couple.” “Maybe,” you shrugged, “I don’t think it helps.” “Yeah. It’s like, obviously there are times when we have to be all coupley and I guess it gets hard to say when something is uncomfortable because then it’s like what about next time we’re out and we have to do that thing anyway. And there are things I’m happy to do with my friends that I don’t think twice about but might carry extra meaning in our situation.” “Exactly. I don’t want to say I don’t like something and make you feel bad when we then have to do it because people are watching.” “So what are you suggesting then?” “Well, we aren’t allowed to see each other in public for a couple of weeks now, right? So maybe this could be a chance for us to take a break. Not in a completely cut off way, I still wanna talk to you and stuff. But if we give ourselves some space, y’know. Try and shake….excess feelings a-and work out our boundaries better.” “Sure, yeah, I can see how that would help.” “It’s just a couple of weeks and like we can still text or call or whatever we just wouldn’t hang out together and it wouldn’t be every day.” “Y/N, I get it. It’s a good idea.” You took a deep breath, “Okay. Cool. Um, so we’re good?” “Of course we are. I-” Ben seemed to stop himself from saying something, instead sighing, “We’re good,” “Good.” There was nothing else to stay but you didn’t want to hang up. Neither did Ben, it seemed, both of you just standing in silence. You could hear faint music playing on his end, like it was coming from another room. Maybe he was in his kitchen, leaning against the bench, the radio on in the next room over. Or maybe he was sitting on his couch, the TV down low so the repetitive game music wouldn’t disturb your conversation. You could see him so clearly, sitting in his usual seat, controller abandoned beside him. You wondered if he could tell where you were. “I guess I should go then,” He said softly, “I’ll talk to you soon.” “Bye Ben,” “Bye cud- Y/N.”

“How’d it go?” Felicity asked when you came back inside. “Alright. We’re gonna take a break from seeing each other so much and sort out how we feel and stuff.” “That sounds good,” “Yeah,” you felt relieved at having had the conversation but it was mixed with a weird sadness you couldn’t put your finger on, making you feel vaguely like you wanted to be sick again. “Why don’t you go lie down for a bit. I’ll hang out and then tonight we can order pizza and watch cat videos or vine compilations or something dumb like that.” “You don’t have to stay, I’m fine.” “Hun, I’m staying. Maybe I’ll take a run to the shop, pick up some ice cream and booze and face masks. Sound fun?” “Definitely,” “Alrighty then, it’s a plan.” You felt slightly cheered by the thought as you made your way to your room and fell onto the bed, not bothering to change or move the covers, but it didn’t stop room from blurring with tears as soon as you were alone.

Keeping the distance between you and Ben was a mixed bag. On one hand not seeing each other meant there was no lingering pressure of another date or photo opportunity weighing on you. But on the other it also meant a queue of TV shows you felt unable to watch since you’d started them together. You didn’t have to worry that Ben would suddenly call you or rock up on your doorstep, unable to keep his affections to himself any longer. But you also missed out on random messages asking if you could remember that song (“you know the one it was from the early 2000s. Went something like…,”) or the way he’d chuck popcorn at you from the other side of the couch until you managed to catch some in your mouth. It gave you a chance to relax without worrying you were leading him on, or that you’d say the wrong thing, or that the rules you’d come up with would be broken. But that was because you barely spoke to him. Your communication was kept to text messages whenever something big happened and not much more. Ben sent you a message when he got a call back for one of the movies he’d auditioned for. You texted him when your neighbour’s dog had puppies, partly because they’d asked if you knew anyone who could adopt one when it was a little bigger, but partly because the second you saw the babies you thought of how much he’d love them. And yes, you were sleeping better without so much pressure and anxiety, but it hadn’t stopped Ben from appearing in your dreams and even daydreams, explicitly so more often than you were willing to admit. Then of course there was the bombardment of emails from family and friends checking in on you after they’d seen the video. It got so out of hand you’d had to make a rare post on your private Facebook account letting them know things were fine, just to get them to stop harassing you. But you couldn’t stop the harassment you were getting from strangers on all your other social media pages. You got into the bad habit of checking all the big gossip mag websites for  stories about you, following them with as much fervour as any fan might. Ben must have had some paparazzi taking up residence on his street too because you saw countless pictures of Ben going about his day – out with friends, walking to Tesco, smoking outside a pub. And every time there was some story attached either about how heartbroken he was or about how he was sneaking off to meet you in private. You coped the same treatment, though sometimes with the added twist of announcing you were pregnant. All it did was make you wish you could have a hug from Ben and talk about it with him. You came very close to buying a pack of cigarettes one day, just so you could burn one and have its scent linger around your house like Ben had brought it in with him. Felicity was brilliant. She found amusement in the unfamiliar photographers, especially when an article appeared with photos of you and her hugging on your doorstep, speculating you’d moved on from Ben already. It wasn’t so surprising that she’d snuck her way into the magazines she so loved to read considering she checked in on you a lot in the first few days. But, as much as you loved her, and as much as she made you laugh, she had her own job and partner to think about and she couldn’t quite grasp what was happening the same way Ben could have. You missed him more than you thought you would, even with all the baggage from his unrequited crush. So much so that the realisation your makeup date was approaching had you grinning as you made your morning coffee, humming the song from his mug.

It was a surprise, though not an unpleasant one, to hear your phone ringing at close to nine the night before the date. You were sitting in bed playing solitaire on your laptop when your ringtone interrupted. Ben was apologetic as he greeted you, repeatedly saying sorry for calling at all. “It’s okay Ben, I really don’t mind.” You said, putting the laptop aside and relaxing back against the pillows. “Are you sure? I should have just emailed you.” “Ben, stop. I’m glad you called. I’ve missed hearing your voice.” “You have?” “Of course I have. I spent two and a bit months doing nothing but listen to you blab, you really think I’d just forget you?” You could hear his smile when he continued, “I’ve missed talking to you too. I figured this would be a good excuse.” “This being?” “Tomorrow night. Peter said he’d send you the info.” “Of course, yeah I got his email. Tomorrow night, meeting at Boucher at seven.” “Yup, that’s the info.” “I was told to dress up and be prepared to smooch.” “Did he say smooch?” “No,” you laughed, “His phrasing sounded a lot stuffier and careful not to create a lawsuit, but I figured that’s what he meant.” “Yeah, um, you’re okay with that?” “Absolutely. It’s a makeup dinner and we’re going to be together for another couple of months so we should play up the romance and the um, physicality and all that.” You tried to ignore the sudden warmth in your cheeks and the memory of your last dream. “Okay, good because I was specifically told about what happens when we leave the restaurant.” “Hmmm I think I remember something about that but again, stuffy non-lawsuit language. Kinda hard to follow at times.” “Basically they want us to make out while we wait for an Uber. Like, proper make out.” “Oh,” “I told them neither of us are public make out people but they’re insisting they need it. Something about it being an obvious indication of getting back together or whatever. And technically we agreed to it when we signed up for this whole thing.” “Thanks for the heads up.” “No worries. Glad I called now, wouldn’t have wanted to just spring that on you. But um, that’s it really, I’ll let you get back to your last night of peace.” “Wait,” you blurted without having anything else to say. “Yeah?” “Ummm, oh! Did you hear anything more about that movie?” “Not yet but Peter said they’re still in talks. Hopefully soon.” “What’s it about?” “It’s an actiony thriller thing. This guy, the role I auditioned for, witnesses a murder and then gets dragged into this revenge mission. I’d get to shoot some big guns and drive a cool car and y’know save the girl, all that stuff.” “Sounds fun,” “Yeah, what about you, any auditions?” “One or two but nothing’s come of them. I sent my reel in for this supernatural comedy about a coven of witches. Too soon to know anything though.” “Well I hope you get it,” “Yeah, likewise.” “Thanks.” You were forcefully reminded of your last conversation when you both lapsed into silence again, neither of you making any move to hang up. You wanted to keep talking but part of you was worried that if you used up all your conversation topics now, you’d have nothing to talk about over dinner tomorrow, and if that happened you were bound to blurt out something you shouldn’t. Instead you just savoured the sound of Ben’s breaths and the odd rustle of clothing as he shifted around. Once again he was the one to break the silence. “Well, as lovely as it has been to chat, I should go. Gotta get a good night sleep so I’m ready to woo you tomorrow.” “You’re not going to bed yet are you? It’s so early,” “I was gonna read or something for a bit actually.” “Have you finished that show we started?” “Which one?” “Any of them? “No. Figured they could wait.” “You wanna watch one now?” “What, over the phone?” “Yeah, we can try to time it so it plays at the same time.” “Uh, sure, why not,” You quickly grabbed your laptop and, after some discussion of which show you were more in the mood for, found the right episode. There was laughter on both ends of the line as you attempted to hit play at the same time, counting down from three between giggles. It took you a few tries but you eventually got them to sync up, more or less. It felt nice to hear Ben’s laughter again, his voice when he sang along with the soundtrack, his comments about the nitty gritty of the production side – odd line deliveries and angles of shots. He was easy to talk to. Though with everything that had happened, everything you knew, just the act of talking to him set off butterflies in your stomach.

It took you well over an hour to get ready for the date. You’d been told to go all out so that’s exactly what you did. With a little help from Felicity so you could get away with a calming pre dinner drink. She gave you a hand choosing an outfit – a dress, short but not too short, classy but eye catching. It had started life as a dress for a movie premiere but after a few years the top didn’t fit quite right so you’d had it altered, the skirt was taken up, cut off and attached to a new top that more suited your current style, leaving you with a slightly shorter and much more you outfit. Glass of Prosecco close to hand, Felicity worked on your hair and offered advice on your makeup. When you were finished and could reveal the full look to her, she squealed. “You’re absolutely going to get laid.” “Shut up. I look alright though? Lipstick’s not too dark?” “Honey, you look gorgeous. I swear, you’re gonna get dicked down in the bathroom of that fancy as fuck restaurant because he’s not gonna be able to keep his hands off you.” You burst out laughing, “Good to know. Not exactly the plan for the evening but at least I’m prepared now.” “What is your plan?” “I don’t really have one, which is not helping me stay calm. I guess just find out if he’s still interested in me. And then work out where we go from there. We talked last night and that was good but I just need to know if he’s, you know, still into me.” “He’s head over heels for you, that won’t have changed. The question is, do you love him?” You wanted to say no but obviously couldn’t so you settled for a soft, “I’ve have missed him.” She hummed with an annoyingly knowing look. “I should be going, the Uber’ll be here soon.” Felicity pulled you into a hug, “Knock him dead, Y/N,” and then, as an afterthought added, “don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” “You first hooked up with your girlfriend because some drunk guy told you he’d buy you both drinks if you made out. There’s nothing you wouldn’t do.” Felicity laughed, “That was just a free drink, imagine what I’d do if there was a fancy French dinner involved.”

You arrived before Ben did. A quick glance up and down the street told you he wasn’t approaching just yet, so you opened your clutch to give yourself something to think about other than the sound of snapping cameras. Phone, lipstick, tissues, compact mirror, three condoms. You laughed to yourself when you saw them and made a mental note to lie about how useful they were when you next saw Felicity. Quick footsteps caught your attention and you looked up in time to see Ben running towards you. “Sorry, I’m late,” he said between breaths, pressing a kiss to your cheek as soon as he was within reach, “My Uber got caught in traffic and I had to make a stop,” He held out a small bouquet of flowers in a variety of pinks, purples and yellows. “For me?” “No for the other girl I’m seeing, of course for you. You like them?” “They’re beautiful,” you took the bouquet and breathed in its sweet scent. “I saw it in the shop and, um yeah, I don’t know, they seemed nice, a-and I know you, um, like nice things, so,” he stopped babbling with a pained expression on his face, for once more visibly nervous than you. “It’s very sweet of you, thank you,” “I’m glad you think so because right now it feels kinda cliché and cheesy. Now you have to carry them around all night, what was I thinking? And god can I just shut up. Sorry.” You couldn’t help but laugh as he scrunched his nose up and ran his hand through his hair, unintentionally endearing, “Calm down, Ben, we’ve done this before.” “I know,” “Let’s just go inside, further away from these cameras, and have a drink, sound good? “God yes,” he nodded and let you lead him through the door up to the hostess stand, managing to pull himself together enough to give her the name of the booking. As expected, she told you to wait in the bar until a table was ready.

Ben downed his first drink in one hit. It made you wonder how hard he was finding it to be around you. Had the space helped him quiet his feeling for you? Or had it just made him want you more? Was that why he seemed so out of sorts, stumbling over his words in a way that was so unlike him. You desperately wanted to find out where he stood but it was impossible without giving yourself away. What you needed was for him to make another phone call you could overhear but the likelihood of that happening was slim. You’d just have to put it from your mind for now. “Better?” You asked Ben as he caught the barman’s attention and ordered a second drink. “Getting there,” He took the new glass and drank, just a sip this time, “You look stunning by the way. I should have said it earlier,” “Thank you, you look very handsome,” He glanced down at the suit he was wearing, “Thanks.” A somewhat awkward silence followed. “So,” you said, louder than necessary, desperate to get him talking like he normally did lest you start to freak out too, “You been here before?” “No. Never even heard of it before Mary and Peter mentioned it. You?” “Same.” You looked around the room, searching for something else to talk about, “Nice though.” “Yeah, yeah, really swanky.” “Bit different from the painting thing,” “Yeah, very. Look I need to tell you someth-” “Mr Hardy? Your table is ready,” You smiled at the hostess, as he thanked her, and followed her towards a table for two, setting your bouquet down to the side. Ben smiled at you from across the table. “You were saying?” you asked, apprehensive and curious. “Oh, um, nothing, doesn’t matter. We’ve got a date to focus on.” “Wouldn’t want all these prying eyes to miss anything,” “Exactly. Cuddle bunny,” You smiled at the nickname despite its ridiculousness and leaned forward in your seat slightly, letting your fingers gently rest against the back of his hand. If he wanted to focus on the date and putting on a good show for the public then that was something you could do, “Babe.” The flush you’d seen creep onto Ben’s face before appeared again and he reached for his glass once more. “So, how have you been?” you asked, pulling your hand back towards you. He looked at its retreat and then back at your eyes, “Good. Got to hang out with the boys a few times last week which was really good.” “Beat them at any more video games?” “They won’t let me anywhere near FIFA at the moment,” “Discrimination,” “That’s what I tried to tell them!” he laughed, seeming to relax a little more, “bunch of babies.” “What about that trip thing you were organising, have you sorted that out?” “Not entirely. It’s with my friend Joe who lives in the States. He was going to come out here but we decided it wasn’t worth it since I’ll be over there soon anyway.” “You will?” “Well both of us will be. Part of the press stuff for The Perfect Match.” “Oh, right, of course,” you giggled and tucked your hair behind your ear. “He’s looking forward to meeting you though.” “I bet he is,” you said automatically. Of course he’d be keen to meet the woman his friend was infatuated with, you would be too. Ben gave you a questioning look but you covered well enough, “I mean, he’d obviously know about us dating so I assume he’d be curious to meet your girlfriend. Especially if we’re having public spats and stuff.” “Right, yeah, definitely. What about you? What’s been happening?”

From there you fell into your usual style of conversation, both of you relaxing more as the night wore on and the bottle of wine you ordered grew emptier. The only difference from normal was the romance of it all, played up as much as possible. Brushing hands as you both reached for the salt, soft smiles and laughs. You even went so far as to twirl a strand of hair around your finger like some love struck teenybopper in a soap opera. When your food arrived you let Ben feed you a bite off his fork. You offered a taste of your meal in return and he held your wrist as he leaned in. A gesture that left you breathless, blinking at him as he slowly withdrew his hand. The wine’s fault probably. You’d polished off the bottle by the time dessert arrived, on top of the drinks you’d had before you sat down. It made you feel looser and you assumed the same of Ben, judging by how different his demeanour was to the nervous, stuttering one he’d had when he showed up. Perhaps that was why, with a spoonful of chocolate mousse halfway to his mouth and no regard for the conversation you were having, he suddenly said, “Can I ask about these last couple of weeks?” “Uh, yeah, what d’you want to know?” “Was it good? The space, did you get what you wanted from it?” You thought for a moment, putting down your own spoon, “Yes. I’m not going to lie and say it wasn’t helpful because it really was. Just, having that break from everything. I think I really needed it. But I really really missed you too.” He smiled at that, looking down at his dessert like he was trying to hide it, “I’m glad. It was hard not seeing you but yeah, helped me figure some stuff out too. Confirmed some other stuff.” “Like what? If you don’t mind me asking.” “Like…um, the thing I said on the phone about enjoying playing the boyfriend. I like having someone special to share things with,” He sighed, “But that’s…not relevant right now. Do you want to get out of here?” You were a little taken aback by the suddenness of the suggestion but agreed, reapplying your lipstick for the cameras while the waiter collected your bill.

Ben wrapped his arm around your waist once you were outside, pulling you close. With the pretext on planting a kiss on your temple he quietly asked if you were ready for the next part. “Lay it on me,” you giggled, feeling warm and light. A second later his hand was sliding down your side towards your bum which set off another wave of giggles. He kept you close as you walked down the street, oblivious to the flash of cameras. Ben kept his arm around you, using the other to open the app and order a car. You stopped when you reached a quiet bus stop, Ben letting you go to sit down, tapping the spot beside him. But his hand wasn’t gone for long, instead moving to cup your cheek as he pulled you into a kiss. “I missed doing that,” he muttered but you were more focused on making it happen again, shifting yourself closer, laying your hand against him, fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt. His heart was pounding under your palm, but it matched the beat against your own chest. You’d forgotten how good he was at kissing but it came flooding back as you opened your lips for him, felt his tongue against yours. His hand was firm on your back, pulling you in but still not close enough. You whined, let him pull you onto his lap, pressed yourself against him, one hand in his hair so he wouldn’t stop kissing you. His hands were everywhere, on your arms and back and squeezing your arse, holding you in place as you arched your back slightly and kissed him harder. A car horn right beside you made you pull away, startled. “Ben?” The older man asked, looking down at their phone, “I’m here to pick you up.” “Shit,” Ben said softly, and then to the driver, “Sorry, yes, that’s us.” You let your head fall forward onto his shoulder for a second, smothering your laughter. “C’mon cuddle bunny,” he said softly, “they’ve had enough of a show.” Your legs felt unsteady as you stood and smoothed your skirt down. Ben opened the back door for you and followed you inside. “So sorry about that,” he said again to the driver. He just laughed, “It’s alright. I remember being your age and completely smitten. You’re that couple I’ve seen online, right?” “Uh, yes, that’d be us, I think” “Well if you wanna keep making out I won’t stop you. Might have to tweet about it though.” Ben laughed, “Thanks but I think we can hold off for a bit.” You looked over at Ben and had to cover your mouth to keep from laughing too loud when you saw the lipstick smudged over Ben’s face. “What is it?” Still laughing you handed ben your compact mirror and the pack of tissues from your clutch. “Christ,” he said softly, “The internet’s going to fucking love this.”

The Uber driver left you at the end of Ben’s driveway with a wink and a have fun. There were paparazzi waiting for you so you grabbed Ben’s hand and pressed a kiss to his shoulder. He led you inside, refusing to let go of your hand even while trying to dig his keys from the opposite pocket. Once you were inside, you placed your slightly bruised bouquet on the hall stand, leaned against the closed door and began taking your shoes off. Normally, after being out together and winding up at Ben’s place, you’d head straight to the bathroom to take off your makeup. He’d go and fetch two glasses of water if you’d been drinking or maybe something warm if the night was cool. You’d change into the pyjamas you kept at his place and then join him in the lounge room, sometimes tucking yourselves under the same blanket, to watch TV until you were yawning and struggling to stay awake. And then you’d wish each other good night and head to your separate rooms. But this time something felt different. You kicked your shoes to the side of the hallway and stayed against the door, watching as Ben pulled his wallet from his pocket, dropping it and his keys next to your flowers. He slowly turned towards you, taking a step closer. And you knew you should move, should dodge around him, make a joke about not needing to take off your makeup since he’d already done it for you but you found yourself stepping towards him too. There was a beat as you both realised how close you were. You heard Ben swallow, watched his eyes move to your lips unashamedly. Later, when you were lying in the dark wondering what the fuck had happened, you’d tell yourself it was the wine. A brief impairment of judgement exacerbated by months of celibacy and an easily suggestable brain. Whether you believed it was another question.

You closed the gap but he was only a second behind, hand back on your waist as his other found your jaw. You wrapped your arms around his neck, let him slowly walk you through the house towards the living room you where you’d spent so many nights joking around. He didn’t stop kissing you while you stumbled through the house, not unless he had to and even then he never went far, his breath hot against your lips. You pushed him down onto the couch and straddled his lap, continuing what had been interrupted, his hands falling back to your arse, pushing up your skirt, squeezing, as you tugged on his hair, making him groan. A single rational thought was trapped in the back of your mind, trying to breakthrough but it was hard to think when Ben was holding you like that, kissing you like that, especially after so long without being touched at all. He broke away to mouth at your throat and it was only then that you had enough time to think clearly. “Wait,” you said softly and then again more insistently. “What is it?” “What are we doing? We can’t,” “Why not?” You shook your head, and pushed yourself off of him, taking a couple of steps back, “It’s rule one Ben,” “We wouldn’t even have to break rule one though, we can just stay here on the couch. No harm in making out if we’ve already done it.” A whine caught in your throat and you took an extra half step back to keep from rushing into his arms again, more rational thoughts pushing through the broken wall and joining the first. You shouldn’t, not if there was any chance Ben still had a crush on you. It wouldn’t be fair. “I’d be good to you Y/N, you know I would,” You shook your head, “You know this isn’t real, right Ben?” “Of course I know that,” “Really? Because sometimes I think you forget I’m not actually in love with you.” What’s that supposed to mean?” You bit your lip to try and stop yourself from saying what you were about to say but it was no use, the words were already half out, “I heard you talking to Joe the night you left your keys at the bar. I know you have a crush on me.” “You heard that?” His eyes were wide, horrified. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to overhear I just needed a drink an-.” “Oh my god,” He sat up straighter and ran a hand through his hair again and you wished it was your fingers mussing it up, “Maybe you should go.” “Wait, Ben, let’s just talk about it.” “Is that why you were upset before the argument? Is that why you didn’t want to see me for the last two weeks?” “I thought some space might help you stop feeling that way.” He laughed at that, “I’m – I’ve been trying to stop feeling like this for months now, since we were filming together, but I can’t, I can’t shake you. I love you. And it won’t go away.” “You love me?” Ben nodded, looking up at you from the couch but you couldn’t meet his eye. “You don’t have to say you don’t feel the same, I know.” You didn’t know what to say, just stood there, frozen in place. “That’s what I thought,” He stood up, chewing on his lip and when he spoke he had to clear his voice to make it loud enough for you to hear, “I, um, I know I just said you should leave but you can’t go yet. There are still paparazzi out there and we’re meant to look like we’ve made up. I’m going to go to bed though and you can stay until they leave or, if you can still stand to look at me, then you’re welcome to stay the night and I’ll drop you home in the morning. I’m really sorry.” You watched him walk towards the hallway, still frozen in place.

[its-sixxers]

OC Interview Meme - Eleanora/Charmer

Tagged by @falloutglow​ thank u sm

Tagging: I think everyone I know has done this, but if you’ve got another OC you’d like to do it for or haven’t go nuts and blame me! :D

“Piper’s got exclusive rights for any of the Institute nonsense, so if anything has to do with that, I’m going to cut you off right there. She’s already going to kill me for this, but best we don’t make it a painful death.”

name ➔ “Oh, I have a few.” She laughs. “If you want my Christian name-” Her eyes sparkle playfully. “- Eleanora Starling.”

are you single ➔ “There’s this guy I’ve been trying to shake, but he just won’t go away.” The way she beams suggests otherwise, but she doesn’t elaborate.

are you happy ➔ “I’ve got a lot of reasons to be happy.” Eleanora clasps her hands together neatly in her lap. “So - yes.”

are you angry ➔ A dark chuckle. “Oh, you’ve no idea.”  Her smile seems oddly unsettling.

are your parents still married ➔ “They had their forty year anniversary, before...”  She clears her throat and her casual demeanor returns. The air seems to relax with her.

NINE FACTS

birthplace ➔ “Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Most alcohol consumption per capita, you know. I don’t know if it even exists anymore, and honestly I think I’d prefer not to know. Ignorance is bliss, and all that.”

hair color ➔ “Brown, and greying more than I’d like. Not as if there’s box dye lying around, though - so I’m trying to age gracefully.” She seems to think of herself as older than she appears to be.

eye color ➔ “Green. Dad always said I was half ginger. I sunburn like one.”

birthday ➔ “March 5, 2053. Which makes me thirty-five, minus a couple centuries unconscious.”

mood ➔ A short intake of breath. “Content. We’ll go with that.”

summer or winter ➔ “Summer.” Her answer comes too quickly, and the intensity of her gaze suggests follow up questions are a bad idea.

morning or afternoon ➔ This question is given more thought. “Mornings, if it’s quiet. Only bit of peace I seem to get these days. If I ever get a chance for a lazy afternoon, though...”

EIGHT THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE

are you in love ➔ Eleanora’s grin turns cheshire. “Aren’t we all?” It’s as good as a yes, and she makes a point of winking.

do you believe in love at first sight ➔ “Depends on the circumstance. In times of war? Absolutely. War tends to...” She makes a vague gesture with her hands. “... expedite things. Makes you focus on what matters. Sometimes love hits you like a bat to the face.”

who ended your last relationship ➔ The question catches her off guard, and there’s a momentary flash of pain on her features before she schools them back to something casual and aloof. “A man with a gun. The same story as too many people out here.”

have you ever broken someone’s heart ➔ She leans back in her chair, canting her head to the side. “When I was younger, probably. Used to be a looker, you know. Hard to believe with all of this -” A gesture to the burns on the right side of her face. “- but I did alright.”

are you afraid of commitments ➔ “If you want the actual answer, you’re better off asking someone who knows your subject instead of the subject themselves.” Her smile’s cheeky. “Lucky for you, they’d tell you the same thing I’ll tell you. No.”

have you hugged someone within the last week? ➔ “I’d be a shit mother if I hadn’t, wouldn’t I? Yes, of course.”

have you ever had a secret admirer ➔ The question causes her to burst out laughing. She composes herself after a few moments, wiping tears from her eyes. “I think so, yes.”

have you ever broken your own heart? ➔ “Thought I did. It worked out in the end.” A thoughtful hum. “Should give that a little more weight, honestly. Maybe my luck’s not so terrible.”

SIX CHOICES

love or lust ➔ “This a puff piece?” She quirks a brow. “Love. I’d say lust if you asked me ten years ago, but time makes fools of us all.”

lemonade or iced tea ➔ “Oh, god. You used to be able to get fresh lemons at the grocery store - none of the packets of powder you’re used to. You’d get the fresh juice from them, add some sugar...” A long sigh. “At least you can still make some good iced tea. Leaf water never changes, I guess. If you haven’t already interviewed General Garvey, I recommend you get him to brew you a pitcher. The man has a gift.”

cats or dogs ➔ “I’m biased thanks to a very good dog.”

a few best friends or many regular friends ➔ “I’m lucky enough to have both.” She grins. “Life is bearable as long as you have one person you can rely on, so we’ll go with the first one.”

wild night out or romantic night in ➔ “You know, I thought I was too old for wild nights out. Actually, I didn’t even know if it was really possible to capture the spirit of them with the... state of things, but I’ve been proven wrong on both counts. Wild night out.” She beams from ear to ear.

day or night ➔ “Night. Everything’s quiet, the darkness covers up the parts of the world you don’t want to see. Not to mention the stars. You could never see so many stars, before.”

FIVE HAVE YOU EVERS

been caught sneaking out ➔ “Yes, but it wasn’t my fault. My friend ran her car into our mailbox just as I was climbing out of my window, and let me tell you, she’d been smoking something. Grounded for the rest of the summer.” She chuckles. “Suppose I’ll be worrying about Shaun pulling the same stunts soon enough.”

fallen down/up the stairs ➔ She glances around, as if trying to ascertain if anyone else is listening. “Never.”

wanted something/someone so badly it hurt? ➔ This time she looks a mix of impressed and annoyed. “It’s a good technique, switching between the fluffy questions and the serious ones. It’s worked well for you, hasn’t it?” A huff. “Yeah. A lot of things. Think we’ve all been there.”

wanted to disappear ➔ “Think we’ve all been there, too. Can we get back to the fluffy stuff?”

FOUR PREFERENCES

smile or eyes ➔ The change of pace is welcome. “I’ve learned to fall in love with a smile. That one.”

shorter or taller ➔ “Couldn’t care less.”

intelligence or attraction ➔ “Brain first. Beauty fades.”

hook-up or relationship ➔ “Too old for hook-ups.”

FAMILY

do you and your family get along ➔ “We did.” A thoughtful pause. “Do.”

would you say you have a “messed up life” ➔ She barks a bitter laugh. “You’ve heard the stories. My life’s a joke even by the Commonwealth’s standards. The Publick has an NDA on that, so I won’t elaborate.”

have you ever ran away from home ➔ “Course not. I had things pretty good, and knew it.”

have you ever gotten kicked out ➔ “I was a good kid. Mostly. Mailboxes getting run over and sneaking out aside. Never got kicked out.”

FRIENDS

do you secretly hate one of your friends ➔ “Hah! Piper drives me batty sometimes, but she’s got a good heart. We just have... different definitions of ‘need to know’. Make sure you write that down. Maybe she’ll listen if it’s in someone else’s paper.”

do you consider all of your friends good friends ➔ “Remember that need to know thing? Not everyone needs to know everything. So - not everyone’s a ‘good’ friend, by the definition most people use.”

who is your best friend ➔ “There was a song about how diamonds are a girl’s best friend-” One of the floorboards creak, and she breaks into the widest smile yet.

who knows everything about you ➔ She points in the direction the creaking floorboards came from - the next room, close to the door. “That’d be him.”

[voidselfshipp]

Future Days (Of You And Me)

Tw: injury mention,blood mention, food mention

Jerico x Joel

Ok to rb

Heavy steps make their way to a cabin,the snow its drowning any sort of noise,the clouds are grey, darkening as the sun sets further into the horizon,the wind blew mercilessly, the pine trees shook at mother nature Will.

Jerico dragged herself to an old cabin,the big windowpanes are shadowed and covered by the mist And the residual smoke.

A chimney, just snuffed out, heavy, heavy boots left ashen marks on the old oak floorboards.

Still, whoever that was they were gone, with the resting embers in the chimney, a Fire came to life,jeri rubbed her hands togheter trying to warm herself, as the Fire slowly came more and more to life.

Its dark outside, at this hour her mind gets the best of her, if it wasnt because of her pets.

Missy growls, the Manchester terrier stands up, pointing at the basement.

Jer tries to dismiss her but the dog insists running to the door,she grabbed her rifle and Ran behind her dog.

She found her licking the face of a Man, heavily wounded.

Jerico looked for any scratches,bitemarks,anything that could point to an infection.

Nothing.

The Man,whoever he was, was breathing heavily, his lungs werent working, and the injure on the left side of his temples was bad, very bad.

She carried him upstairs, leaving him near the Fire.

His life force was slipping through her fingers, she could feel it,Like water down a stream.

She got to work quickly, cleaning and tending the wound as much as she could.

The person that left probably had unfinished bussines with this Man.

She did the best with what she had, and so she scavenged for supplies.

Her hand couldnt help but wonder to the Mans face,brushing a strand of hair away from his face, she smiled softly and warmly, oh he was very handsome.

His pulse was very weak, his breaths heavy and shortened.

The chances of him surviving were Slim to none.

Yet she grabbed a can of food and cooked it, sitting him up and trying to hand feed him.

He could chew at least.

When he had eaten enough, she let him sleep on her sleeping bag.

She then Ate what was left with missy, and sat besides him, with her rifle in hand patrolling the área.

The night went on with false alarms, so when the smoky clouds cleared she packed up shop and carried the Man on her sled Back to her home.

A small cottage hidden in a Valley between two big mountains.

Yet a green garden grew, food, fruits and even a bit of livestock grew and lived in there.

She left him rest on her salvaged couch, changing the bandages.

Feeding the cows she then sat on the porch, missy curled up besides her.

From there you could see all the forest, the climb there was too much for an infected to climb up to, so it was her little piece of heaven, its early morning, the sun still rising over the mantle saying goodbye to the night and stars.

The wind started to pick up from a slight breeze to a strong wind.

She entered the house, starting a Fire in the chimney.

She sat besides the Man, guitar in her hand, the dog at her feet.

--If I ever were to lose you--she sang--

I'd surely lose myself

Everything I have found dear

I've not found by myself

Try and sometimes you'll succeed

To make this man of me

All my stolen missing parts

I've no need for anymore

I believe

And I believe 'cause I can see

Our future days

Days of you and me....--jerico had to stop as the Man reacted to that song, sluggishly trashing around.

That song seemed to mean something to him.

So she sat there lost in her own thoughts, until lunchtime arrived,unbeknownst to her as her mind wandered off into dreamland.

She made food then, a warm stew for that windy windy day.

She served three plates.

One for the misterious handsome Man, anotherone for her,and of course one for missy.

She again tried to feed him, and I say tried because the Man kept on moving away like a child, maybe he was getting some of his consciousness back.

When she was going to drop the towel an idea popped in her mind, you could almost see the lightbulb turning on in her brain.

--Back when I was feeling broken

I focused on a prayer

You came deep as any ocean

Did something out there hear?

All the complexities and games

No one wins, but somehow, they're still played

All the missing crooked hearts

They may die, but in us they live on

I believe

And I believe 'cause I can see

Our future days

Days of you and me...--And as she sang the Man seemed to be more calm as he ate, or well, munched.

She let him rest as she Walked upstairs to her room,or well art room.

Salvaged pencils,errasers and brushes, some of her best artworks were hanged all around her.

Her day ended doing the thing she liked the most.

Creating.

Eventually,jerico started using the Man as a model,it gave her a challenge, try and draw him as close as himself as she could.

Shed keep a Journal, were she kept track of his progress.

The Man eventually came to his senses,it took some weeks until he introduced himself.

He couldnt walk, or move from that couch,he could still bathe( with the help of jeri to at least take him to the bathroom)eat,and sleep.

But that was about it.

One particular morning jeri was eating breakfast on her porch admiring the sunrise, the dark mantle of the night, turning wine red as the Oranges and yellows announced and aclaimed the arriving of the sun.

Her pet curled up by her side.

Though a particular tune seems to distract her, a man,singing.

--All the promises at sundown

I've meant them like the rest

All the demons used to come 'round

I'm grateful now they've left

So persistent in my ways

Hey angel, I am here to stay

No resistance, no alarms

Please, this is just too good to be gone

I believe

And I believe 'cause I can see

Our future days

Days of you and me

You and me

Days of you and me--by the time he was done singing jer had Walked back into the livingroom

-- thought you couldnt get up?--She sat besides him.

--well-- the Man said leaving the guitar besides him-- I couldnt help myself but to play, I missed the sound of it

A warm smile appeared on jericos face as she looked away -- howd you slept?

--havent had a goodnights sleep in a while..-- he answered.

--hm..--she grunted in agreement--i should...I should go and pick up some of the veggies on the garden...you can still play my guitar though...I dont mind

She stood up,as the Man stummed the chords.

--Joel

--what?--jeri who has walking to The door turned on her heel.

--My names Joel-- he said.

--nice to meet you Joel-- better late than never,she guessed.

After picking up the best of the vegetables she Walked in back to the kitchen, she could see that Joel was still playing, entretained by the guitar.

She tapped her foot along the way as she started to prepare lunch.

The Man however took his chances and explored the house.

Stairs were still tricky, but somehow he found his way into her art room.

--What.. the hell?--he asked to himself picking up one of the portraits she had done of him, and her Journal right Next to it.

One of the last entries had been written maybe a couple of days ago.

"The misterious Man is still reluctant to introduce himself, I do get it, in this world trusting is hard.

Yet I cant shake off this feeling whenever our gazes meet.

Hes pretty funny in his own Way,when he isnt resting I find him quite charming.

This is the last drawing I made of him, I wish I could find the courage to show it to him"

Joels factions soften chuckling at the fact that the woman that saved him was a huge softie.

--Joel!foods ready!

He put the drawing down and went downstairs to eat.

They sat across from eachother, he was kind enough to help her set the table.

They quietly chatter, Jerico asked him about exterior things of himself, she knew not to poke around in things she shouldnt,and Joel didnt say more than what he should.

Yet the conversation had a warm undertone that left the both of them with a smile on their faces.

Joel took a nap,and she locked herself up in her art room to try and organize her running thoughts and feelings.

He didnt trust anyone easily, nor did he let anyone became close, emotionally or physically.

But that same night the rattle of the Windows were too much,he knew he was safe and yet he couldnt help but Grab his blanket and go up jericos room to slip into bed with her.

--Hey.. jerico...can I.. can I stay the night here?

He felt like a kid again, but a happy feeling overcame Jim when she said Yes.

His back was against hers, he snuggled closer to himself.

Yet, the panicked sensation wouldnt go away.

So he did the best Next thing and hugged jeri.

--Watcha doing Joel?--Her tone was playfull, but he looked away nonetheless, and yet she snuggled closer--relax Man, just joking

He chuckled looking away-- the last time I trusted someone this much I...uh..

He heard her sigh--the scar?

--yeah the scar

--If you dont mind me asking.. what happened?

Joel sighed heavily, pulling her closer.

--i saved a chick,and ran with her to safety, turns out she had some unfinished bussiness with me...and so here we are ...

Jer Turned around hesitantly cupping her cheek,he leans in her touch hugging her waist--im sorry you had to go through that...

--on the bright side I wouldnt have met you..

Jeri chuckled and he kissed her.

Kissing back she caressed his hair, they spent the night cuddling away,singing togheter the song that brought them closer.

[caracalfeather]

WARNING- Cats and Birds is a mob AU fanfiction of the Arcana game, and is not meant for young audiences and is not meant to offend anyone. Some writing choices were made so characters are out of their canon way of acting and thinking. Please do not be offended by character choices made by the authors and content creators, this story was made for fun and in the way we wanted it to be. The story was not hijacked by any of the authors to make any ships or characters overshadow any other. All content contained in this story has been agreed upon and accepted by all parties in it’s creation.

TW- Cats and Birds contains scenes that may not be suitable with some readers, including themes of violence, smoking/drug use, sex, cursing and various other strong themes. Special warnings for scenes will be posted with chapters. Proceed with caution and Reader��s discretion is advised.

9

The next morning, Rose shivered against ilya, waking up to a cold room. She wrapped herself in the blanket.

Julian stirred awake, he just laid there and didn’t bother to move, the barking had stopped sometime in the night so Julian wasn’t completely sleepless.

Morning darling.” Rose purred and kissed his neck, smiling “You were rough last night.”

“Hmmmm….you think?” He sighed, caressing her face.

“It was good. But that nickname wasnt your best idea. It was cute though.” She sighed

Julian blushed and hid underneath his pillow. Damn her. “Why can’t you just leave me alone?!??” He groaned into his mattress, her haunting was becoming increasingly annoying as long as that goddamned photo wasn’t burned to ash.

“D-did i do something again?” she looked at him, her smile dropping from her face.

Julian sat up in a hurry and cupped Rose’s face. “No! No darling! It’s not you! God it could never be you.” He sighed, “I think I’m being haunted is all.”

“.......” She looked at him, skeptical and stood up “Im...going to shower…” She picked up her clothes and mumbled.

With rage boiling in his blood Julian dug through the waste basket and tore the photo up. “Good riddance to you, you're ruining everything!” He shouted, the pieces fluttering to the floor. He tore the photo in a few big chunks but Julian was more disappointed in himself more than anyone.

As Rose showered, Plume was downstairs making plans for Rose's next trip heist. It would be a little longer than her last.

Julian was on torture that morning, he slipped on his black gloves, and faced the cell. His mind was not in the right place but a job had to be done.

“Alright. Our queen is heading out for a month or two to chicago. She’s going on a supply run and needs a companion.” Plume set down the map of the route as a few guys volunteered. Meanwhile, Rose was toweling off and packing her bags, mumbling to herself and trying to think if she’d done something to upset ilya. She hurt on the inside and wished she could just disappear into her bed.

He opened the cell and was met by two brown eyes. The woman who was handcuffed was big and she looked….really familiar.

The woman looked up, “look….if you’re here to torture me I already told the big fella that it was all a misunderstanding-“ her eyes flashed and she laughed. “Noooooo…..yes? It can’t be???”

Julian looked into the eyes of...Bèatrice.

“Bèa….what the hell are you doing here?” Julian growled.

Bea spat blood into the concrete. “I could say the same to you, you son of a bitch. We all thought you DIED.”

Julian could not handle this today, he rubbed his temples, “but that’s not why you're here.”

“Right…..I’m here because I was looking for Madeve your dog.” She explained, “he’s been getting out a lot recently and I’ve been helping get him home.”

He nodded and Bèa continued.

“What would she say if she knew you were here? Would she ever forgive you-“

Her words were cut short by a bullet to the head. Julian held the gun with shaking hands and stepped out from the cell. He was probably going to get a scolding from Plume, but it was worth not having to deal with this matter anymore.

Plume looked up from the map at the sound and growled “Damn it. Alright everyone, prep the queen and get ilya.”

Like clockwork Ilya was dragged to Plume. Julian with a blood splattered face was so done with everything and everyone.

“Who the fuck did you kill now you usesless dog?” Plume hissed, tossing the map into a bag and glaring at him.

“A trespasser.” Julian hissed crossing his arms over his chest.

“Whatever. Rose is leaving for a few months.” He pushed Julian into a chair “We’re getting her things ready.”

“I take it, I'm going with her.” He sighed, “I am pretty sure I’m the last person she wants to see currently.”

“It's up to you. She’s getting her clothes from your room right now.” He mumbled. Upstairs, rose was bending down to grab her shirt, pausing as she noticed torn pieces of paper on the floor. Carefully she looked at them, her heart sinking slightly as she saw a beautiful face she’d only seen in magazines. Her mind began to wander as she put the paper in her pocket. What was he doing with her torn picture? Was it an infatuation? Maybe it was just remnants of an old magazine…

Julian found Rose in his room. He smiled, wiping some stray blood from his cheek. “Well, I took care of the trespasser.”

“Huh? Oh...thanks.” Rose put her jacket on and fixed her hair, unimpressed.

“Did I piss you off again?” Julian frowned, “Rose, this is becoming a pattern and I would like for it not too.”

“No, I'm just busy and sore...sorry.” She sighed, going to the door, the ripped pieces in her pocket.

Julian sighed and began packing himself, meeting Rose out in the garage when he was done. “So we’re going all the way across the country. For supplies. “

“We? You're coming with me?” She put her bags in the back as plume nodded “Yes. and You two are fetching more artillery from our Chicago pride since we can't ship them anymore.”

“Perfect.” He smiled, tossing his bag in along with Rose’s. “Are we going in disguise this time?” His smile widened into a mischievous grin.

“Yep. Once you're in the city rose will be dressed as Mistress thorne and you” Plume tossed lingerie looking close at him “Will be her collared sub Thomas.” Plume laughed “No one questions the mistress.” It was a joke, but he didn't doubt ilya would play the part anyway.

Julian laughed, “ha! Good thing it’s a long drive it will give me plenty of time to get into character.”

“You'll keep your mouth shut.” Rose mumbled and got into the driver's seat.

“As my Mistress commands.” Julian bowed dramatically and got into the car.

Blasting music, rose took off to the highway, opening the window as they began the trip.

“The city seems strangely quiet today.” Julian sighed staring out the window, “we haven’t gone on a long trip together in a very long time.”

“Yeah… almost a year now.” she mumbled and glanced at him “New york last time.”

Julian chuckled, “That’s Right! That mission was an absolute disaster….but it was fun. And you had fun fucking me into oblivion.”

“Mhm. next time i'll gag and peg you with a strap.” She weaved her way through the streets, listening to an old rock song.

He unbuttoned his shirt slightly, his charismatic smirk on full display. “Just hearing you say that makes me hungry and excited.” He traced a gentle line from her cheek down her neck.

She slapped his hand away and huffed “I'm not touching you until we get to chicago.” Her voice growled “Then I'm going to make sure you submit and learn your place.”

Julian held up his hands in full surrender, shutting up. He instead brought his attention to the passing streets.

The ride was a long 10 hours until they finally stopped at an inn. It was pitch black outside as they got a room, Rose spent another hour nursing a blunt on the balcony. Her mind was full of memories of old lovers. Each had ended up leaving her for Hollywood models and performers, saying they were better than her. They had called her an alley cat, a mangy stray. And after finding that picture, rose was sure ilya was fantasizing about being with a performer. Someone prettier and more talented. She finished smoking and dropped her head, looking at old scars on her arms.

Julian wrapped his arms around her and hummed into her neck. “Someone is in the pits of despair” he chuckled, “ I thought I was going to get punished once we arrived.”

“In chicago. You have 15 more hours.” She looked at him “Cant a girl smoke in the night in peace?” She looked at the dark night.

He let her go, “alright I get it. You're upset I’ll leave you be.” He retreated back into the room. Mulling over what he did this time. Each answer leading to the one thing he had been fighting these past 2 weeks.

“It doesn't feel good, does it?” She whispered and looked at the moon “Gods, my papi would kill me for being this petty.”

Julian heavily sighed, “you think I haven’t been suffering? Your suffering makes me suffer! And aside from that, I’m still just suffering.”

Rose went into the bathroom to shower, sitting on the tiles as warm water hit her back. She got lost in thought, a few tears mixing with the water.

Julian flopped back on the bed. Rubbing his eyes in frustration. He wished that bullet had killed him, it would spare a lot of feelings and memories that were now causing issues.

Rose came back to the bed, laying down with her back to ilya, browsing her phone quietly and yawning.

He looked over at her, “I’m sorry.” He muttered.

“For what?” She mumbled, setting down her phone on the nightstand.

“For everything.” He sighed, “I’m sorry I stumbled upon your branch in Spain, I’m sorry you had to save me while I was bleeding out. I’m sorry I have made life so much worse for you. Rose I love you, but there are things that….haunt me. They have come back and it has affected our relationship, and I’m sorry!!! So so sorry!!”

“....Believe it or not… You're the best thing that's happened to me ilya.” She mumbled, looking at the wall “And i know there's shit that both of us deal with…. But i don't regret saving you. Or falling in love.”

Julian shook his head, “what if I regret being saved?”

“NO.” she sat up and glared at him “You shut the fuck up right now ilya. Don't ever say that.”

“...I CAN’T HELP IT ROSE!” He shouted sitting up. “I have been suppressing so much pain!”

“THEN WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LET IT OUT?! IF NOT TO ME THEN TO SOMEONE OR SOMETHING ELSE?!” She got out of bed, her eyes stinging as she went and locked herself in the bathroom.

Julian punched the wall and fell back into the bed. Rubbing his eyes, he tore his eye patch off and rubbed his bad eye. Trying to prevent everything from coming out.

[mountain-of-divine-fire]

Crystal spirits, and how i work with them

Disclaimer. this is all my personal experience and beliefs. though this post is educational, take from it only what you believe. my word isnt the authority and neither is any other blog post. 

In my experience with crystals throughout the years, ive learned many things about them. i hope this post will help yall out there, who are maybe beginners, or just curious on how some things work, or how others like to do things. 

This post does not list crystal correspondences.

This will be a bit rambly, but i hope you get what i mean~

Obtaining your friends

Couple of options for this, i would suggest going rock hounding in a local area. Bring your companions, water, and your tools.

Maybe youre in a place with slim pickings,like me. you can just buy some online or in person

Crystal shopping online seems more convenient since you can look everywhere for whatever you want, and get to compare prices.But physical crystal shops are great because you can tell by feel who wants to come home with you. 

honestly, i believe nothing happens to a crystal that it doesnt want to happen. and if it does, it will end up fixing it itself. If you get a crystal that doesnt feel right, you will know who to give it to.

Im in the crystal shop. Now what? Well, just take a look around! see what catches your eye.I like to have a very loose suggestion of a shopping list, but it usually gets thrown out the window. If you feel like you need to touch something, do it. (unless the shop says no touchy ofc). Some things will practically jump out at you and scream “TAKE ME WITH YOU”. If you dont find something that really yells at you, and you still want to bring something home, just find something pretty. 

 How crystal spirits work

This is mostly based on what ive experienced. this doesnt come from any specific belief , but it does align with how some people practice animism. 

(much like in steven universe,if i had to give an example,) Crystals pop out of the ground, knowing who they are and what they do.They may grow and change with their experiences, but mostly, they know what theyre about. They are given energy and life by the earth, and they do their job. 

Each crystal group, species, and individual type seem to have overarching personality traits and a group spirit. i think some folk call these “crystal devas” but im not entirely sure where that comes from and what that entails. also each vein, and individual piece, has their own spirit and personality, say, beryl and quartz are completely different. An amethyst and a rose quartz are both quartz, and therefore have a similar type of personality, but are different. Each amethyst also has its specific differences. A chevron would be different from a grape jelly. Two individuals broken off from the same cluster would be different but similar, and so would each half of a broken slab.

sometimes individuals have names, and sometimes they can be named by you. some like to work with each other, and some prefer to work alone. 

Each crystal has correspondences , but sometimes those general guidelines can be deviated from, simple because the individual just doesnt do that kind of thing. 

My crystal broke! what happens then? Well, now you have two friends to work with. Some folk like to keep one half and give the other to a friend, some keep both halves and glue them back together with super glue (i do this with show pieces), and some folk like to bury them and return them back to the earth. You dont have to get rid of your broken pieces if you dont feel like its time. The crystal will let you know

How crystal spirits communicate

Most of the time, unless youre just really closed off, you will just feel it. They usually speak in feelings. if one wants to come with you for the day, you will know. If one wants anything , youre gonna know it. Dont second guess yourself, and just do it on impulse, pretty much.

These spirits are from nature, and are usually not relatable to humans (theres exceptions to this, like lab made crystals, and carved skulls, more on that later.).  they can and will communicate in ways youre not familiar to, if you dont do spirit work.If a crystal tells you its name, like its TRUE name, you might not even be able to comprehend the words its throwing at you. dont try to decipher it, just let it be. also , try to keep true names secret unless they tell you otherwise. 

If you cant really feel what they try to communicate, you could also meditate. If they want to say anything at least. just get cozy and meditate as you usually would, once you get good and calm just hold a rock and sit with it for a bit. Usually this type of communication is more in detail, maybe fully formed thoughts and sentences, maybe images. Once i even got one that liked to speak through song lyrics!

If you cant do these, use a pendulum! Ask the pendulum where its yes is, and where its no is. (for me usually, non human or complex spirits like to go left and right for yes, and forward and back for no. for animal spirits and servitors, ive found usually they nod yes and shake no. not sure how plants respond just yet.)

Ask it some troubleshooting questions first like “are you an amethyst, are my eyes blue, do i live at XYZ” ect... 

A problem with pendulums is, if you try and use a crystal pendulum when working with any other spirit, the crystal itself may respond. Always ask if youre talking to the right entity.

What might a crystal communicate to me? It could be something as simple as “my name is  ⌷ ⌷ ⌷ ⌷ ⌷ ⌷ “ or   “you like to smoke cleanse usually, but i would specifically like sunlight ”, or it could be advice about a situation that you need help with. 

Can these spirits be malevolent?  personally, no. i dont think so. though it can be a grey area. most nature spirits want nothing but the greater good for themselves, nature, and maybe even you, if youre a good person in its eyes. 

there are instances where a crystal could be “angry”, maybe because the way it was obtained, or that it holds some kind of curse/hex/negative energy (maybe just even being around something awful that happened). Usually cleansing a stone will help with this. And if it doesnt? Try and see if you can do anything for it. 

Be careful about crystal runes, as you can piss them off. ive made a few mistakes in my time working with them(and by a few i mean a LOT, its not fun), in general just dont be a dick, and dont ask for things youre not ready to know the answer to. always thank them for cooperating, and cleanse them after use. 

What are the effects of this? for me, it was like a terrible panic attack, i was suffocating, my heart was going nuts, it was so hot, and i was so dry mouthed. i have never had panic attacks that bad. Tried to use some quartz crystals to ground myself, since i knew it was an attack, and they broke in half in the middle. This is completely my fault. I got scared and locked my runes away because it told me something i wasnt ready for, the next time i busted them out (and i hadnt thanked or cleansed them since,) is when they decided to teach me that lesson.. i was new at magic and stupid. and im glad my first big mistake was with something this forgiving. You probably wont ever have to deal with something like this if youre generally respectful. please learn from my mistakes. 

As with any divination and spirit work, you need to take protective measures. when youre speaking to a crystal spirit, you may actually be talking with something else. and it could be negative. use your best judgement please. 

Whats up with cleansing/charging/ect..?

 a lot of folk like to fight over whether or not you need to charge, cleanse, and bless or whatever else you need to do to crystals. Personally,i do like to cleanse crystals after heavy use, spellwork, or when i first get them from a shop. just to get rid of residual negativity. 

Crystals can hold information, but as far as charging them, im not so convinced. crystals arent a sigil, or something you made yourself. it has its own energy from the earth and its spirit, and will work perfectly fine without any of that.  Only do what you feel is necessary 

If its fine without charging, then why cleanse?  other than getting rid of stored negative energy, its just a nice thing to do every once and a while. It sort of works like an offering. showing that you respect the entity and want to work together in a mutual relationship. if you keep up your end as a guardian, then it will help you. 

How do i use crystals in spellwork and every day life? 

well heres some ideas! 

carry some around in your pockets/bag/bra/whatever according to whoever wants to come with you , and crystal associations

Gridwork. make a crystal grid

In spell jars/bottles/satchets 

As a decoration in your house to give the space a certain mood, feeling, or help. 

In meditation, to give advice perhaps, but also to help you according to its correspondences 

In divination, as help. 

As vessels for spells, enchantments, servitors, and whatever else (always ask it first!!! im using a large quartz as an astral tether, and a smaller one to house a servitor) 

As a friend. ever heard of pet rocks? well this is just an aesthetic step up from that. 

in your plant pots, to help them grow and thrive (be careful about water solubility) 

Pain relief and healing (only do this in congruence with actual medical care! keep around a fluorite for sinus issues, but definitely take your cold medicine) 

Important notes~

 As with any spirit, treat your crystals with respect. especially since theyre gifts from the earth. Dont act like you own a crystal. Like a piece of the earth, we really dont own land either. You arent its master and it doesnt have to do what you say. when you buy a crystal, youre pretty much signing up to be its guardian, and adding it to your team. be good to the earth, and to your friends, and a crystal will be good to you. 

if you have suggestions on other ways to work with crystals, comment! I hope this post was informational and not a complete rambling mess. have fun working with your rocks, yall~. Post about crystal skulls coming soon.  

Admin Fifa~

[ofcloudsandstars]

Day 2

I feel like this was the most intense day because it was the day we went to explore the town center and I really cant describe every shop we went into.

The main street is lined with like older stone buildings, some painted vibrant colors and some just old stone. Something about the aesthetic of the town is very fairy-like and full of art everywhere. There were alleyways with murals of forests, the goddess, planets, mandalas, animals, mushrooms etc. Everywhere you looked there was art painted on to something and statues of gnomes, mushrooms, fairies and the goddess. If it wasn't colorful, then it was old stone and medieval-ish. Its a really small town so there was just one street of lots of shops but it was nothing but back to back magical stores some with specialty focus like a magic book store, a magic herb and aromatherapy store, a magic tool emporium store, a magic crystal store, a robe and cloak shop etc.

There was this BEAUTIFUL crystal shop with BIG fairy energy I went into. The shop owner was very fairy-like herself. Actually a lot of people in the town either had strong crone shamanic vibes or fairy vibes. There were so many magical old ladies in shawls, cloaks and sweaters of different vibrant colors with sparkling hair tinsel laced between their silver locks that would be tinted different pastel colors cause they no longer needed to bleach their hair. A lot of people wore hair tinsel actually and had lots of sparkly piercings and crystal jewelry. There were a lot of shoulder-cats, pentagrams, wooden STAFFS some with crystals on the top. It was the first magical town I've been to where people were just unapologetic about being a witch or pagan. I mostly loved all of the older women there who had such intense energy and were just free to be themselves.

Anyway back to the crystal shop (Named Elestial by the way) which I am sure throughout the week I dumped an embarrassing amount of money on, they color coordinated their crystal collection in a beautiful way that my libra self couldn't handle. I got so much stuff and some crystal planchette for my ouija board since my friend that's a medium suggested it could help use it since usual planchettes can be hard for the spirit to move. I got a smokey quartz one since it's protective but further in the week I got a cotton amethyst one that looks beautifully ghostly from another store. There was this gorgeous herb, candle and aromatherapy shop we went to called Starchild. You can smell it down the street and I took pictures I will post cause describing it won't do justice. They played the most FIRE sound tracks you'd imagine hearing if you went to a forest rave. They had oils for every sabbat, zodiac sign, druid tree, plant you could imagine. Their stuff smelled incredible. They had massage oils for every purpose even sexy ones that were like called things like Exctasy (that had st. johns wort in it) or Love Potion No. 9 which had herbs in it that I never heard of, except like Damiana of course lol. They had these INCREDIBLE hand made candles that literally looks like something out of a fanatasy movie. I bought many. They had candles for zodiac signs and planets too. Just imagine candles of many shapes, sizes, textures (I got frothy candles that look like some goblin shit lol) colors. They had a huge library wall of jars filled with herbs you could buy by the ounce. Also a wall of books on herbs and green magic as well. I'd highly recommend that shop!

(Not much more to read but I’d thought to add a read more out of consideration for people scrolling)

We went through this goddess corridor which has a walk way with crystals embedded into the walls of the corridor. There was a goddess temple which is free to go in and you can ask the priestess to smoke cleanse the hell out of you in her dark chamber. There was a MASSIVE tapestry dedicated to the goddess of Avalon which is the local goddess they honor as she is the personification of the land which Glastonbury resides on. In that courtyard there is a huge statue of a dragon outside of the library of avalon which I wasn't able to visit unfortunately.

We went to the Green Man shop which was owned by a really sweet pagan woman who told me all about her house she lives nearby where she can watch the barn owls swoop over the fields in the summer and family of deers in the winter that come to her window 😭 I got so much stuff in that shop. First of all its so cute inside like everything is green with ivy garland hanging from the ceiling so you feel like you're inside a bigass bush. And its very earth-witchy like I got a pentagram with a stag on it, a black notebook with a silver pentagram on it, tons of cards with beautiful pagan art like one with golden leaf with a crowned owl (probably stolas lol) and a few yule cards. They also sold lots of cauldrons and incense. Everything was SO CHEAP. Also every shop had an insane amount of rainbow-color coordinated walls of incense sticks. I never ran out of insense sticks.

Other shops that were note worthy that I visited throughout the week was this beautiful home store that sold indian furniture that was SO CHEAP and of INCREDIBLE quality. The nature of the community was so supportive of one another and not greedy that they don't see the point of upselling their stuff though they have incredible things to give out. The town and community is so small we kept seeing the same people over and over so I guess its also wise to not fuck people over lol. Anyway this store is beautiful when you pass it at night all the lanterns are lit up and it adds to the beauty of the main street.

There was also this CAMPY fucking witch shop called the wonky broomstick in this old building towards the end of the street that sold like spooky bar soups, had a huge smoke machine cauldron in it and sold silly incense like Pixies Dance (I bought it) Dragons Breath (I also bought it) Mermaid's Blessing (you already know..) and tons of other campy things like colorful grimoire journals and candies inside of cauldron pots. It was perpetual halloween in there and also had some harry potter merchandise. I think the English economy really benefitted from the harry potter years lol but you can tell though some tourist shops were still trying to market with it, its starting to die out. There's also this really great bookstore thats next to the haunted tavern which sold really great books on magic and spirituality for super cheap. I got a book about healing yourself when no one else can lol. 😢

After the shops we walked up to the Tor which was SO BEAUTIFUL like I was ASTOUNDED by the walk itself and how beautiful the countryside is. I felt like I was on some hobbit adventure as we walked through open fields with cows grazing around us or horses nearby (thankfully behind a fence cause they can sometimes have no chill) coming up for a pat, and the hills curved in a way that you can see forests rolling around you and the tor high up in the distance. I felt like I needed a cloak. There was a man nearby hiking with his puppy near us that spooked the cows around us so he had to carry his naughty puppy lol.

While climbing the hill I got this insane realization that I have been dreaming about the Tor and glastonbury for years. Its one of the towns along with London that I've been having dreams about since I was 15. Glastonbury came about later though like I was having dreams about it when I was probably 20?? I remember thinking of it as a sweet and peaceful escape and I remember the town my dream world cooked up being really small and in a way underdeveloped from the cities I was used to. I think if I were to live there I would be happy but be a bit isolated cause that’s what my dreams showed me. I have so many dreams of me climbing up on the steep hill of the tor and looking at the patchwork quilts of towns around me. When I was up there it was like something CLICKED like a place I kept visiting and didn't know what it meant, finally meant something. There's a town nearby in my dreams thats still very spiritual and earthy but a bit more down to earth and Expensive and snooty that I remember I was trying to find a way to move into. It has a lot of big houses and beautiful alleyways and cobbled streets so maybe I need to look at the towns around there and figure it out. I have a feeling its not Bristol though I feel like I need to check that place out too. (Actually it could be Bristol?) I just know now that the dreams I had are about real places I need to see and I thought those dreams were just fantastical since they were beautiful towns with magical people and castles But those beautiful towns with castles and magical people actually exist in real life.

The tor itself was beautiful. We took a lot of pictures and stared at the scenery. I felt like I was in my element cause I love air. There were birds all around us. We watched the sun set burn behind the clouds as we walked down the steeper way.

[ideclaremarvel]

Open Mic

Steve Harrington x Reader

Introduction: Hello!!!! Is ya girl i haven't made a story in so long and i am just in love with Steve and billy from stranger things because who wouldn't ? and just everyone so i might make new stories of those characters. Olala but i'm not taking in any request! ): im sorry just have a busy life and I want to focus on one character at a time. Bare with me i'm rough it's been so long!!

Not sure how long the series will be put i want it to be long and cool haha. Everyone is alive bc i cant wait til season 4 !!! idk how i feel about it but here ya go this probably sucks sorry

warnings: drinking and drugs nothing too bad 

Chapter 1: 

Summary:  After the events at Starcourt Mall, destroying the flayer monster and everyone still managed to come out alive, everyone who was everyone decided to go their own ways. The Byers family moved away along with El & Hopper. As a gift Hop fixed up his cabin for you to stay since it was somewhat destroyed by the Flyer monster. You work at a small bookstore in Starcourt Mall along with Nancy. town there's a small bar that you occasionally read your poetry to the drunken people, it was only for the weekend random people from the bar or around the neighborhood would read their poetry/stories, no one you knew went here. 

“Hey Nac, is it alright with you if I head out now?” 

looking down your watch it read 7:30 it was Friday and the mall closed at 9, you just want to get home have a shower possibly change clothes before heading down to Dragons Corner Bar. you found this bar when you were tripping on shrooms walking through some woods, thought you were walking in wonderland in the middle of October here a Hawkins. What's odd about the bar was it was hidden, the driveway is long and the parking was big enough to fit probably 100 cars but there's always people walking here. People who are not from your town. Every time you went you felt like you've entered dark ages of dragons, princesses, kings and queens, the entire bar was shaped as a castle. 

“Yeah that's fine Y/N, go enjoy your night!” she said with a smile, she usually takes closing on Fridays and you'd take Saturday, as a win win, both satisfied.

As you were leaving the store looking around starcourt so many families laughing, kids running around at their playstation, mothers sitting all together chatting who knows what. A Lot of people from Hawkins high are always here but luckily for you, an exit next to your store. It was a blessing. Avoiding big crowds and possible interactions with people from school isn't what you want. You hated it. Weirdly enough your friends with Nancy who used to be popular, both of you guys are opposite personalities, you will like the odd one out considering you love rock/punk bands and wearing dark clothes, but you always made it look cute making some popular girls angry. You found it amusing. 

Walking to your car wasn't much of a walk since they have a section for employees to park, another blessing this Mall has to offer. As you were unlocking your car, you heard the door the mall opened. You wiped  your head around, only to find your favorite crush wearing his cute sailor uniform, ‘thank god i don't have a dress code’ you thought.

 “Steve! Ahoy mate!!” 

giving your best pirate voice and mimicking dancing around in excitement to seeing him, Steve on the other hand that it was bad and laughed. 

You loved the way he laughed it was gentle and soft, not enough to roll your eyes but enough to keep making him laugh forever  “Y/N enjoyed the attempt but that was bad!” Steve laughed clutching his stomach like he couldn't breathe

He was wiping away tears that went down from all the laughter” i must say cute little dance you did, ya missed me that much?” Steve said sending you a wink.  

“are you done now? I tried okay don't give me your bs” you rolled your eyes trying to be sassy.

 “Hey now i said it was cute” Steve said while taking off his shirt in front of you, not caring if anyone saw. You couldn't help but stare a little bit, he was fit, nice arms, toned, abs looked so nice you'd want to lick them. Snapping out of your trance of the boy, you went into your car, open the glove compartment to get a small bag containing rolled joints. picked one out throwing the bag onto your passenger seat, fumbling in your purse for a lighter. Groaning not having one on you. 

“Need a light?” Steve said holding out his lighter already having the flame dancing for you

Leaning over to light the joint perfectly placed between your lips, inhaling and exhaling before handed it off to Steve, you always loved smoking with him. hell, he's the one that got you into it in the first place. 

“Did you roll this?” Steve asked admiring the perfectly rolled joint like he's never seen one nicely rolled, twirling it around if with his fingers. 

“Yeah, I usually like to roll a couple at a time and light one whenever” taking the joint from Steve, you briefly touch his hand, that alone gave you small butterflies, sending you shivers all throughout your body.

“How was work? It was pretty busy up at Scoops, god little kids are a bit annoying not knowing what flavor they want” 

Steve said frustrated touching the back of his head “robin took care of most of them trying to get them to leave already” he said taking the joint from you inhaling, exhaling the smoke trying to make a ring. Failed but he tried. 

“Work was okay, had a few customers come in to buy books, rearrange a small area in the back with Nancy. Were thinking about getting a rescue dog or cat to keep around the bookstore, so were making a little hang out area for people to read their books and have a nice time with animal” 

you smiled at the thought of it coming together, you were more excited to adopting a kitty. Steve was looking at you smiling, admiring just how beautiful you are and sometimes he wonders if he should ask you out, he always had this crush on you but from all the rejections he's gotten asking you made him nervous.

 He found it sexy just watching you hitting the joint, sometimes he wants to take your face in his hands and kiss you till your lips fall off but he couldn't he was too scared. He really wants to.

“Should get both? Don't you live at the cabin all alone? Get a cat for the bookstore since they are low maintenance and they can take care of themselves”  

“I actually haven't thought of that, being alone in the cabin doesn't get lonely, im used to it, peaceful. Besides i asked Nancy to move in since she wants to be away from her house” you took a couple more hits off of the joint before burning it out. Looking towards the sky above trying to look at the stars but it was cloudy so nothing was out. 

“I can take you to a shelter and help you pick a cat or dog, whichever you'd want” Steve said giving you a small grin like a little small boy, ugh you thought to yourself, sometimes you think he likes you but you're sure he flirts with every girl. 

“Yes i would love that, maybe get food after? My treat” you said singly leaning over to him giving him the biggest smile ever

“Yeah we can eat burgers and milkshakes, how does that sound? I know a place we can go” Steve said while getting down off of your car hood, stretching showing a little of his abs. ‘Fuck’ you thought to yourself. ‘Why am I like this’ thinking this made you groan in annoyance hat Steve picked up

“ whats up Y/N ? watcha got going on tonight? Steve asking while fixing and trying to style his fluffy hair that you oh so loved.

“Gonna go home, refresh myself and then read a book, easy night for a long day” you lied to him, you didn't want no one knowing where your little secret bar was, you didn't want anyone to hear about your poetry. 

Especially Steve, sometimes you write about your feelings about him but still you'd rather hide it and not have anyone know about it except well for Nancy she’d know about the crush you have for Steve for awhile now, she says it shows all over my face whenever he's around. Never got what she meant but never cared.

“Sounds relaxing to me, i'm going to meet Dustin and everyone for a drive a Quarry, ill see you around princess” Steve said while getting into his car, rolling down his window flashing you the prettiest smile “i hope you enjoy your night Y/N” waving to you while driving off. 

“I wish you'd kiss me” you said out loud but no one but you heard that. Getting into your car you drove off.

Entering dragons corner everyone knew you, pretty much you will come here to escape being alone at home and nights when your thoughts got too much and a drink is what you need. 

“Hey Y/N welcome back!” 

Tom yelled from behind the corner waving at you. 

“Hey Tom! Hows Betta?”

 you smiled and waved taking a seat next to Lewis the other bar owner. Betta is tom's wife for over 40 years! You wish you find your soulmate and be together long, sounded cheesy but it's something you've always wanted. “Whats up girl” Lewis said going in for a fist bump. 

“Betta doing good, she's been out of town visiting her mother and sisters” he said while mixing up your usual drink, dirty pina colada. not one for beer because of the taste and itll reminded you too much of your stupid father. “You miss her? Whens shes coming back?” you asked wondering when she’ll be back, she treated you like her own daughter after some poetry sessions you'd cry so badly in the bathroom, since you became a regular and pretty cool, they gave you a key for the back office that's so quiet and away from all the noise.

 “She should be coming tomorrow, she's been gone for 3 weeks! Not having her around the bar have been so quiet” he said coming around the bar, taking a seat next to you. 

“Here made your favorite, added a lil too much of alcohol but it should be okay” tom said giving you the drink with 3 cherries on top because he knows how much cherries are your favorite.

Taking a gulp from the drink you can slightly tell the more alcohol in this, burned your throat a bit but the chillness of the drink helped.

“The drink is wonderful and much needed” enjoying the drink while looking around its a full house, lots of people. Just thinking about being on the stage made you sick but thats why having one dirty pina colada was enough

 “Open mic is gonna be starting soon, i think Lewis is getting the mic set up” he said standing up from his chair stretching and sighing 

“It's been awhile since we got this much people, betta would be happy” 

You had your journal with you with all of your notes of places, people you meet, drugs you've tried, and all the poetry you wrote. It's something you don't want to ever lose. 

“Can I go first this time?” I asked nicely, giving him my biggest pout.

“Yeah i gotchu, want another drink? Virgin?” asked before wanting to add anything, he knew you drove here, doesn't want you to be impaired while driving, he cares about you too. 

“Yeah, thanks I appreciate it” accepting the drink while Lewis stands on stage getting everyone's attention.

“Welcome welcome our insomniac and alcoholics…..

Earning a chuckled from the crowd. 

Welcome to Dragons Corner, tonight we are hoisting our open mic and everyone who is everyone is able to come up here, thank you all for coming and enjoy your evening!!!’’ earning a loud cheer from everyone and having the small fainted of jazz music played, they like to keep it quiet when people are talking but not having any dead silence could get boring and make the readers nervous too. 

“We'd like to start off with our favorite writers Y/N!!” Lewis said clapping towards my direction to motion me on the stage having everyone cheering for me made all my jumping nervous calm again.

“Hello everyone, im Y/N and i will be reading some sort of love poem for someone that i wish would notice me, alright here we go…

When i think of you i think of all the good things life has to offer

like coffee on an early morning 

the first sight of the sunset or sunrise

Or when someone falls in love for the first time

The way you smile 

The way you laugh

The way your hair is poofy and curly

Sharing smokes, secrets, food, love

I wonder what's it like to kiss you

To touch you

To feel you touch my skin

I wonder what's it like making love to you 

My lips ache for yours 

Please notice me

Notice me how birds notice a worm on the pavement 

Notice me

I want to give you the world in this cold lonely world

Notice me………”

You finished and stepped off the staged, everyone snapping their fingers no one clapped during open mic it was just more quieter and better. “Who is this lover boy?hmmm” Lewis said walking down the bar and meeting your gaze

“This kid named Steve, i went to school with him. He was this big king of Hawkins high before Billy came into town and took that title. Steves sweet and nice. He's always looking out for me” 

you said smiling just thinking of him made your stomach want to do flips, just something about im made you feel so alive, he’d always make sure you were okay. 

“Does he feel the same?” asked while cleaning around being busy but still talking to you 

“I'm not sure, well i don't know, i wish i knew..” just the thought of him liking someone else made you sick and sad. You just wanted to be his.

“You're too wonderful Y/N, i bet he does feel the same” giving you a pat on the shoulder and giving you a warm smile the one that says ‘you got this’ 

You let out the biggest sigh and decided to head out. “Alright Lewis, Tom i'll see you guys tomorrow night!” waving at both of them as you were leaving the magical castle. Stepping outside was a little more chiller than before but luckily you dressed warm. Turning on your car playing fleetwood mac.

Returning to your cabin, you've decorated it with tiny lights so when you've come home in the middle of the night you can see where you're going and not fall and hit yourself like last time before buying the lights, recalling the memory and the pain you just glad it wasn't anything major. Although the figure waiting on your porch was something you didn't expect. 

“Steve?” you questioned the figure it was dark you couldn't tell who it was

“Hey Y/N..” he replied with a little sadness in his voice something you notice right away 

“Lets go inside, got something on your mind?” asked curiosity hoping it wasn't anything but bad but just wanted a friend

“I thought you were here like you said earlier but no one answered so I waited, it was only an hour, i dropped Dustin off and i wanted to see you again..” he smiled towards your direction while being distracted with your living room and how nice it looks.

“It's so cozy here” he said eyes wandering around can't seem to be fixed on something

“I try to make it as cozy as possible since it's just me, i need my home relaxing environment. It helps alot” you said while disappearing into your room to change into pjs, you hadn't realized you forgot to put on pants because your tipsy mind forgot about Steve

“Cute butt” Steve said while checking out your ass, couldn't help himself but also want to embarrass you. Realizing this you ran to your room to grab a pair of shorts 

“My bad, had small drink” your face redder than a tomato at this point. Steve on the other hand found it adorable you blushed really dark red 

“Soo steve why are you here and no home?” completely forgot about why he was waiting for you

“Well i wanted to see a movie but not alone and so i thought of you, i have movies we could watch” steve taking out 2 movies from his jacket and handing it to you 

“Halloween 2 and Alien, hmmm horror type? Lets watch alien i love Ripley” popped the movie in and went over to the couch where Steve started to get comfy

“Would you want to stay? It's late and I wouldn't want you to drive” you asked hopefully it'll be a yes since you could possibly ask to cuddle later on. You looked over to Steve lost in thought but snapped back to reality quickly when you asked him to stay  

“If you don't mind, we can make pancakes tomorrow” he said with a soft smile 

“Yeah i'd love that” 

[dont-follow-me-im-scared]

My worst goodbye

Per my therapist request im "journaling" breakup I guess. I mean its been a long time coming but this time it was real and needed to this might be long but here goes:

The force,

I dont even know where to start so I'll start from the begining. The night I met you, when I walked into that bar I had no intention of meeting my soul mate. Yes soul mate. I never believed in them until I met you. But after 9 long years ive learned sometimes we meet our soul mate and we dont get to keep them. I had quite a bit to drink, see you didnt know this but I was 19 I just looked old enough to be there and I had gotten divorced a few months before my world would be forever rocked and changed. The night carried on the christmas air was no match for the drink and the long sleeve I had on. I removed layers the more I drank and I stayed close to the bar. This tall man with the bluest eyes id ever seen was taking care of my drink needs but young me saw a mountain I wanted to climb. I was informed you were married when the regulars realized my attention wasnt going anywhere but you. I flashed the bar (dumb kid is probably what you thought) but everyone in there knew it was for you. Hell I said I wouldnt do it unless you were there. The night carried on, my friends were restless trying to protect whatever modesty they felt I had that night. I wanted to go to the after party I was told youd be attending. They refused and wanted to get me home. Closing time was coming. I wrote my number on a napkin and waited. You went back towards the bathrooms and I knew somehow in my awe struck drunken stuper that was my chance. I walked back caught you right at the end of the hall. Do you remember what I said? I can. The words and moment is forever burned into my brain. "I can keep a secret". Slipped my number into your front pocket smooth as fuck. Which isnt me. But you know that right? Because after that night you saw sides of me no one was ever allowed to see. You saw me grow as a person and into a woman. That was the begining of the end. That singular moment with rumple on my breathe as I stood on my tip toes to lean as close to your ear as I could when I spoke those words. I took in how you smelled. I had no idea soon that smell would be my favorite and put my spirit at ease.

I woke up the next morning with a text from an unknown number. Then the conversation started. You filled in the parts of the night that wasnt clear. You made me nervous. A sensation that would never die down. Tuesday. She'll be at work. Dinner and hang out at the house? Sure. I bet you thought you were getting lucky that night. Not as lucky as I was going to be I guess. Because see even though this is a goodbye, and one thats tearing me apart I was so lucky to feel this. Not everyone gets to experience this with anyone in their entire life. You had a young child. Maybe 3 months I think. Timing in the universe is shitty like that. We sat on the couch. Me almost shaking with nerves but trying to keep my calm because I refused to look a fool in front of you. Do you remember what we watched? Big bang theory. And from then on anytime I saw an episode (I never watched it myself) my thoughts would gravitate back to that couch with you. Do you know how hard thats going to be on me now because that shows everywhere. I guess thats not your problem though. We didnt have sex. I was too nervous and I mean I felt like I was going to puke you made me so nervous. But there was a warmth. This tiny spark of a fire that was felt by me at least. We made out alot. But everytime you reached for my belt my gut screamed "No! Not yet" and ive never been one to ignore my gut. I left. I parked my car a few houses down. The late December air felt so cold against my face because my cheeks were burning like id be in the gym. This couldnt be real. I texted you when I got to the end of the street. "Im sorry I couldn't have sex with you I was so nervous if you dont want to meet up again i get it." I expected you to blow me off. I mean you are older and a bartender. I knew in my head what you were use to with women. I had only been with two people my whole life but you. You reeked experience. Then my phone did something that felt magical in the moment. It lit up with that text. That text reassuring me you wanted to see me again. The text that made me float the whole way home.

The visits became more frequent. Sex with you was amazing. You engulfed my body in what seemed like worship. Not one inch of me ignored. Hands and mouth just exploring the new territory. I was more adventurous. I wanted to make you happy in every way possible. Theres a need inside me to make sure youre happy. There's this new feeling like in a woman and not just some highschooler whos date is trying to get lucky. Theres a chemistry unmatched and indescribable in all honesty. It happened on the couch. The 2nd time I saw you. You carried my straddling body to your room all that was on was my unbutton jeans and your jeans. Your arms lifted me with such ease I gasped. I remember. See how much I remember. Your bedroom smelt like soap and the sheets smelled clean. The only light in the room was the green from the clock by your bed. Then before I knew it your mouth was where no other mans had been. You gave me a new experience I had been deprived of before. Then you were inside of me when I felt like my body was going to stop. Laying there after wards, your hands playing with my spine while we had small conversations in between sighs I considered if this could be forever. I knew right then you were different. I knew we were different. I knew there was something in my way but never desired to remove it. Your kiss at the front door when I was leaving had a longing. Like you didnt want to send me away. It was dark. The neighbors didnt know but as bright as I felt like I was shinning I wondered if they were peering out of the windows to see the source. Was any of this real for you? I dont think I want the answer because it was so real for me. This all sounds crazy. You're married and I knew but here I was.

It got to where id barley make it through your unlocked door without you scoping me up like youd waited all week to get your hands on me. The text in between visits didnt seem like enough any more. So I started doing what any logical in love person would do. I started getting hotel rooms and going to the bar on the weekends. I had to see you more. Hear your voice. See you smile at me from across that bar knowing I was picturing having you under me on every surface there. It made it fun right? Like we had a huge secret right in front of everyone. Including your sister in law who bartended with you some nights. It was a rush right? Knowing I was going to be in that weed infused hotel room half drunk mostly stoned in the see through black robe you love(d) so much. Knowing there was nothing between me and you but this thin fabric. Do you think people could see it on our faces? Your friends became mine because I was at the bar so often but none of them knew. Our conversations grew and we became friends who just happen to explode with this chemistry. It was more than what it had been but that was the most itd ever be. Remember the Halloween you dressed at a 20s gangster. Remeber the red dress i rushed into the bar in on new years eve so I could kiss you by midnight. Do you remember taking me in your arms around my waist and kissing me in front of everyone? I'll never forget because that was a moment where I thought this is how it could be. I met you for lunches. I met you at quicktrips for a five minute visit. Boyfriends came and went but you never left. I kept you around. Remember the apartments down the street I moved into so I could be closer. You whistling while I was waiting at my open front door. That smile. You nuzzling me after on the balcony while i smoked. I hated you had to leave me every time. You lingered in my door hesitant to walk away. The good thing about me living so close is you got to spend more time with me.

I stated you were my soul mate. I mean it. I have forever missed my chance with the one person I truly believe was made for me. All because a year of timing. You told me so many times had it not been for your baby youd leave. I believed you. I love my husband and my daughter but no one will ever light the fire you did inside me and still do. Which is why I need to walk away. Youre a source of confusion in my life. I cant allow myself to question if my relationships right because I dont have the feeling I did with you. Does that make me bad? I dont think so. I love him and dont want to hurt him which is why I have to do this. Cutting an imprint with you is one of the hardest things ive had to do but hurting him would be harder. I'll never forget a million things about you. Memories with you. I honestly hope you'll never forget me. I wish I could tell my daughter about you one day and how she never needs to settle unless someone makes her feel like you made me feel.

Love always

Youre biggest fan.

[arthurflecksgirl]

Nothing but clowns /Arthurs POV

My version of the scene when Arthur watches the news on tv

Making food for mum is always a bit complicated. Much to think of, because there are always two questions: Should I put some sleeping pills in her oath meal or not? And if yes how many? I check and notice that I am running out of meds. Shit.

The plan for today is:

Visiting Dr Kane, going to the pharmacy afterwards and then go to Pogos.

Today`s not a usual visit at the comedy club. Today will be my day! I will tell my own jokes up on stage. I`m no longer the lonely man sitting alone on his table with a glass of water in the middle of the room. I will be the star up there and people will have a good laugh. Even Sophie. And I just know she will be there to see me. I hope she will get my humor- I`m sure she does because she was digging it in the elevator- and maybe she`ll like me even more afterwards. I would love to leave Pogos together, take her out on a date, have a coffee or something. Talking about how I write my jokes and what inspires me to write them. How it feels like when funny thoughts cross my mind and how much of it is hard work and how much just comes to me. Maybe she`ll be interested in that after watching my performance. Interested in me. I`ve heard that humor is important in a relationship and that woman prefer men with a good sense of humor. So maybe I will have a chance after all.

I dont hesitate to take the last two sleeping pills and crash them to mix it in my mother`s bowl. No way I would give her the chance to ruin my afternoon. Everything is planned out and I know she would freak or do something unexpected as soon as she watches me leaving the house all dressed up. She would make a big scene as soon as I`m coming home after a long night out. And I just don`t have the nerves to deal with her shit. Besides that, it`s not good for her health to get all excited or angry about something. So a little sleep will help us both.She`ll be all save and sleepy when I come home, not a worry on her mind about where her son might have been.

"Happy look, Thomas Wayn`s on TV" My mothers voice echoes through the living room. her voice always feels like an echo to me. Because its always the same words filling the room, over and over again. Crashing against the heavy walls  without a sound but her thin voice .

"Happy Happy Happy. Thomas Wayne. " Two words that make my ears bleed in one sentence. How does she do that? It`s getting worse. Her voice just makes me feel bad sometimes. I really do care about mum a lot but some days I feel triggered by her talking and I don`t know why. Its like she says something and I immediately feel like I should eighter crawl under a blanked and hide or punsh a fucking wall.

"Yes mother!" I try not to sound annyoed. Not that she would ever notice if I was. Or hurt. She never does. Mum would have made a common therapist. Just sitting there, repeating the same three sentences for years while looking right through you.

Mum as a therapist would be like:

"Thomas Wayne will be major soon. How does that make you feel? Thomas Wayne does have some enemies lately. Does that change your own opinion on him? Did you noticed how skinny you are? Thomas Wayne gained some weight instead of losing it . How do you feel about that?  Are you sad today, Happy? "

And of course all my answers would also echo through the room. Unheard and without making a sound while crashing through the windows. Breaking glass. And I would cut myself on that glass. Over and over again. And Penny would call the doctors,telling them I tried to hurt myself again. Not realizing that she was the one hurting me.

My answer to her questions would be "Happy was always sad. Every minute of his life. How does that make you feel?"

I get the bowl and crush the rest of the pills. My wet hair is sticking to my neck. I`m freezing a little bit while wearing my PJ  pants only . It`s always cold in here. This apartment represents peoples hearts.

"They`re asking him about those horrible subway murders" she says.

What? Oh my god. This caughts my attention. Now I notice that I wasnt paying attention to the news for the whole time. Somehow it didnt cross my mind that there will be something about me on the news anytime soon. I was wrong!

They thank Wayne for being here, in these difficult times. Difficult for who? For him?  As if he would care about what happened or about anyone who isn`t like him. As if some dead guys on the subway would effect him personally. Does he know what it means to have a difficult life at all? I`m aware of the fact that money doesnt solve all problems. I dont even think about money. I think about so many other things Thomas does have and he is nothing but an arrogant prick about, Looking down on others.

I leave the kitchen and make my way to the couch "Why him?" I ask, placing her bowl of food on the table.

Why is Thomas the one talking about the three dead guys anyway?

"Look like he gained weight" .

I knew she would ignore my question and care about his looks instead. Seriously, sometimes I get the feeling like she has a crush on him or something. There must be a reason for her fixation on this man.

"Yes all three worked for Wayne investments. Good, decent, educated."

So thats why he is talking about them.  All about the money, Wayne huh? I run my fingers through my hair, getting nervous.

"Although I didnt know any of them personally, like all Wayne employees, past and present. They`re family."

There he said it. He didnt even knew them. He`s just using them to make it seem like he cares.

The tv screen shows three photos. Each one of them a face of the subway guys. It feels strange to see them now after I killed them. My memory of their faces slightly differ but I remember what they did and how it felt.  My mind is racing, all over the place. Memories of their evil laughter. Flashbacks of the pain they caused me. Physically and emotionally. Their photos might look innocent but I know what kinda guys they were. I experienced and wittnessed it. But what does Wayne know? Or the tv guy? Nothing. No one was watching them while they almost kicked me to death. I was alone. I`m always alone.

"Did you hear that I told you we`re family" my mum says.

"Shhhh shhh shhh!" I want her to shut up. I just cant stand her voice right now. Especially not now. She really does think Thomas thinks of us as family because she worked for him decades ago. I can`t listen to this. Its getting all too much. The only voice I have to listen to right now is the guy on tv. I take a deep drag of my cigarette. It feels like breathing is getting harder. Something is going on. Not just inside of me but in this city. In the world. And it started with me. Am I the center of something? The beginning or the end? Am I everything at once? Does someone notice its me?

"There now seems to b a groundsweel of ani rich sentiment of the city. Its almost as if the less fortunate resitends are talking the side of the killer".

Thomas talks about how much of a shame this is and that this is one of the reasons why he is running for major. Gotham lost its way.

Oh you notice now? Where have you been all these years?

Its hard. So hard to watch peoples ignorance and how they use things to make themself stand in a better light. A light of lies.

They now ask him whats up with the eye wittness report of the suspect being a man in a clown mask.

Now the walls are closing in on me. I`m terrified but at the same time I am not. Unsure of how I feel I smoke my cig, not being able to blink while starring at the tv screen. This moment feels so much more like a daydream than so many dreams did. Is this truly happening? Are they really taling about a murder a did on the news? Is this my first time ever being on tv? Well, I gotta be honest here I always thought my first time on tv would be a lot different. But here I am.

So seems like there was someone wittnessing it. I should be worried now. I should freak and I know that. But what is bugging me much more is the fact that Thomas Wayne says "It makes total sense to me, because what kind of coward would do something that cold blooded? Someone who hides behind a mask. Someone who is envious of tose more fortunate than themselves. That the`re too scared to show they`re own face."

Thats it. Thats when I lose it. I`m trying not to let it show because of mum sitting in the same room with me but it`s hard. I`m good at hiding my feelings in front of her or in front of anyone in general but this is too much. The news are making a total different  story out of this, As if I was hiding behind a mask to go out an kill people. It was self defense for gods sake. I was wearing that damn clown make up because I was on my way home from work. Some shitty bullies started to attack a man in a clwon costume and now they are making him the bad guy? This is sick.

I never cared about money. I just wanted to have enough to take care of mum and be able to pay rent. Even my dreams about being famous were never about being rich. It was about being seen and loved.  But what do they know?

I thought I was living an illusion but they are living their very own illusions.

I feel my body tensing up. Every muscle. Every inch. My skin is getting tight. I lean back on the couch. I dont know what to do. I wanna get out of myself. Being me is getting unbearable again.

Another time being missunderstood.

They dont even know it was me and they still don`t get it right,

"And until those kind of people change for the better,those of us who made something of our lifes, will always look at those who havent as nothing but clowns". Wayne adds.

My legs start trembling. There is no way to hold them still. Bad sign. Very bad sign. I laugh to myself as I stare at the ceiling. What a joke. Great punshline with the clowns. I bet you are proud of yourself, Wayne. I bet you are. Always glad to be able to help to tell a joke.

They thank him once again while my mum tells me that this isnt funny.

I wanna say something but I better don`t. It`s not a good idea to ruin someone else`s punchline.

I`m going to explode, explode, explode.

Until I feel nothing.

I inhale the smoke, the only thing that proofs that I am still breathing.

Because I cant feel it. The only thing I feel is rage and my left hand grabbing my right wrist.

And this god damn candle that looks like a ginger cat staring at me.

@impulsiveclown @will-you-be-there @jokerownsmysoul @missjoker96 @arthurskitten @lynnesm @nonnymousse @gwynplaine89 @ajokeformur-ray@damnrightobsessedwithim @sgtsavoytruffle  @duhliriouss  @flowerglitterwoman @thirstforfleck @spookyhome @iartsometimes  @you-cant-cry-in-here @bustafatclownnut @jokerismyhubbie  @check-out-this-joker @darknessisafriend  @arthurhappyclown    @neon-umbrella-for-stella   @call-me-harley-quinn  @arthurjokersgirl  @raven-romanoff @ajokeformur-ray​ @ivedescoveredheathsjoker​

@aarthurfleckk @mylovelycrazyworld @clownalog @ajokerfangirl  @the-one-who-is-chaos @sabrinaeileensnape

[kz-i-co]

Easy Money: Part II

» Summary: You continue to be a troubled teen and your parents are sick of it.

» Pairing: Jeon Jeong-guk (Jungkook) / Reader (troubled teen)

» Genre: Smut

» Words: 4.8k

» Warning: This is a very high school cliche so be advised for, fowl language, drug use, mentions of sex, drinking, etc. May be offensive for some readers. Also its very important to realize the bad peer pressure in this story. If someone makes you uncomfortable, even if they are a friend, you need to walk away. And say No to drugs because even if it seems cool its really not.

» Part 1 ╫ Part 3 | Part 4

» m.list ╫ bts masterlist

-

"(Y/N)!" Some one shook you in your sleep. "(Y/N)! Wake up."

Your eyes fluttered open to see your little sister giving you an annoyed glare.

"What time is it?" You leaned over for your phone.

"It's 12:45 you bum."

"Ouch." You got up and you noticed another girl in the door way. It was Mina the girl you babysat last night. You almost forgot that your sister was friends with her.

"Mom said you have to drive us to our soccer practice."

"Okay what time?"

"I have to be there by 1 o'clock." She looked more annoyed.

"Okay, I'll be ready in no time." You laid back down as they left your room.

"Lets just get my brother to drive us, he's home." You couldn't make out the mumbles from the other side of the door.

Your eyes drifted off again and before you knew it you sat up alerted forgetting what time it was. You grabbed your phone and saw it was now 2:15.

"Fuck...I only closed my eyes for a second." You got up and got dressed in a simple lose tank and ripped skinny jeans. You just threw on some flip flops and threw your messy hair in a cute bun.

You ran downstairs and figured out the house was completely empty. You fucked up once again. You had a habit of disappointing every one. You went outside as you lit a cigarette since your mom wasn't home.

Your phone rang startling you, coughing out smoke. You picked up the phone seeing it was your best friend.

"Yes." You answered.

"You home? You should come to the park, there's these hot guys playing basketball. Woo." She said excited.

You laughed. "Sure, I'll be on my way."

You quickly grabbed your bag and started walking down the street.

You scrolled through your phone as you walked on through. You didn't even notice the boys watching your every move.

"That's her?" Taehyung asked.

"Yeah."

"Wow, your babysitter is hot." Yugyeom said.

"She's not my babysitter, she's my siblings babysitter."

"What's her name?" Yugyeom asked.

"(Y/N)." Jungkook answered.

"Hey (Y/N)!" Yugyeom shouted to get your attention and it did.

"What the fuck guys." Jungkook hid his face while you looked over confused.

You stopped and unlit your cigarette and kicked it in the street. Jungkook made his way over awkwardly.

"Hey." You smiled.

"You smoke?" He asked.

"Just a little." You brushed it off. "Is my sister over your house?"

"No, I drove them to their soccer practice."

"I'm sorry, I was suppose to but-"

"I know, your sister gave me an ear full." He laughed.

"Thank you." You smiled. "My sister hates me."

"Yeah, I can tell."

You laughed from his surprising remark. "Well I'll see you later maybe."

"Okay." He smiled. He seemed to be showing his shy side probably from his friends making rude gestures behind him.

"Tell your friends to stop jerking off." You arched your eyebrows.

He turned around and they hid their hands behind their back quickly. "Sorry about them." He flipped them off but you were already on the move again.

"I hate you guys."

"We didn't do anything." Taehyung said.

....

"There you are finally." Cas said and you sat next to her and Jen, with Jae on your left. "Look at those hotties."

"They are college guys, I cant wait." Jen said.

"Are you going to the party tonight?" Jae asked.

"I cant I have to babysit."

"Till what time? You can go after right?" She continued.

"11."

"That's when the parties get wild." Jen said.

"Okay, I'll have to sneak out as embarrassing as that sounds." You said. "My mom treats me like a fucking baby."

"Sucks to be you, we only have a week left of spring break."

"I know." You pouted, but that quickly ended as one of the guys playing basketball lifted up his shirt from being too sweaty.

"Take it off." Cas yelled making the guys laugh.

"Cas we are in a children's park." You and Jae covered your faces embarrassed.

"I don't care, he can take me right here if he wanted and I don't care whose watching."

"Oh my god." You said.

"Pretty sure that would be illegal." Jae said.

"Whatever." Cas didn't care.

"Hey do you guys know any underclassmen?" You asked.

"I'm in the yearbook committee, so I might." Jen said.

"His name is Jeon Jungkook."

"I know of him, only from the yearbook but I don't know much, why?"

"Don't tell me you have a thing for a freshman?" Cas said.

"He's not a freshman, he's a junior." Jen clarified for you.

"Same difference."

"First of all you don't know what I was gonna say and second of all he is 18 so whats the difference?" You snapped.

"I thought you wanted to hook up with Ryan." Cas said.

"I did hook up with Ryan and he's a douche." You said. "But anyway, I was just asking if you knew him."

"And college guys aren't as cool as they seem." You continued feeling pissed off.

"I'm sorry, what were you going to say?" Cas looked at you as the rest of the girls.

"Nothing, just that he's my sister's best friends older brother." You shrugged panicking.

"That's it?"

"I think he has a crush on me, it's so cute." You lied. Your friends drove you crazy and you hated trying to keep up with them.

"Aw, maybe you should boost his confidence." Jen winked.

"What do you mean by that?" You asked standing up, taking out another cigarette.

"I'm sure he will be at the party, I think more juniors show up then seniors." Cas said stealing it from you.

"What you want me to do?" You asked annoyed.

"Just give him a big smooch." Jen smirked. Already did that.

"I'm not doing that." You laughed.

"Unless we dare you?" Cas said.

"Really?" You raised your eyebrows annoyed.

"You chicken? Or do you really have some kind of boner for this guy." It was getting to the point where you were almost annoyed of everything that left Cas's mouth.

"I'll do it, I just don't want to lead the poor guy on." You said. You didn't want him involved with your click in any sorts. They can be cruel, especially towards younger classmen.

"Who cares." Cas lit your stolen cigarette.

"You really don't care?" You asked getting an idea.

"No." She laughed.

You smirked and walked over to the guys playing basketball. "What are you doing?"

She yelled after you.

"Hey guys." You got their attention. You can sense your friends getting closer. "My friend wants to suck your dick."

You felt a quick tug and rowdiness from the guys as your friends dragged you away.

"Great, every mother in this place probably wants us dead." Jen said as you walked away.

"I'll see you later." Jen and Cas went a different direction.

"Hey, what's wrong with you?" Jae asked.

She was the 'goody two shoes' in your friends group. Never drank or smoked, never messed around with guys at any of the college parties you snuck into. She was against all of it but you still had been friends with all of you since before that happened and you all still had a close bond.

"Nothing, I'm just sick of Cas's attitude sometimes." You sighed.

"You mean about Jungkook?" She asked.

"Yeah, I actually hung out with him a little bit last night and he's pretty cool."

"Then don't pay attention to her." She said.

"I wish it was that simple." You pursed your lips.

"Well, If she does something that upsets you, then you have to tell her how you feel." Jae shrugged. It was simple as that. If Cas was gonna make you feel like this, then it's not worth to be her friend. You'll just see how things go.

You like how you could be honest with Jae She would never judge you about anything you cared about and that was important to you.

-

You went back home to find a pissed off Ara and disappointed mother.

"I'm sorry?"

"When are you gonna get your life together?" Your mother folded her arms.

"Just because I didn't wake up to drive her to her stupid soccer practice, I'm getting a lecture?" You complained.

"It doesn't matter....I ask you to do something you do it."

"Okay." You said with slight attitude. "It won't happen again."

"You're grounded."

"You're grounding me? But it's spring break."

"It doesn't matter? You need to understand the consequences."

"What consequences? I got a stupid job for you, I came home on time." You snapped.

"The attitude (Y/N). That's the biggest consequence."

"I cant wait to move out." You ran upstairs.

You slammed the door and locked it and went straight to opening the window. You pulled out another cigarette and lit it up. You were never a heavy smoker or anything, but the stress was really getting to you and it was the only way to relax.

Halfway through your smoke, the door handle jiggled and a simple knock. "(Y/N) Please open up." Your father called. Your father wasn't as strict as your mother.

You huffed out your last breath of smoke and quickly put out your cigarette and slid the tray under the bed. You shut the window and just sprayed a little bit of perfume to hide the evidence.

You unlocked the door and opened it revealing your father. He came inside and sat on your bed sniffing the air from your fresh perfume.

"Are you smoking?" He asked with an intense glare.

"No, I don't smoke." You tried to hide your panic.

He didn't believe you. "We will talk about this later."

You sighed and sat down next to him.

"Why are you fighting with your mother so much lately?"

"I'm sorry. Mom just stresses me out." You combed your fingers through your hair.

"I know, she can be harsh, but I talked her down on only giving you a warning."

"Wait, so I'm not grounded?" You perked up.

"You're not grounded, but your curfew is still 11:00 and we understand that's when Mrs. Jeon gets home so be home no later then 11:10 Okay?" You nodded. "And you can't be sleeping in so late anymore, you will be going back to school soon."

"Okay okay. I promise."

"Okay good." He looked at his watch. "Looks like you need to be heading over there soon." He got up and you realized the time.

"Thanks dad."

"Love you sweetie." Then he left.

....

"Thank you so much dear, you're really the best sitter we've had." Mrs. Jeon said.

"Can I get that in writing?" She looked at you confused. "I'm sorry, my parents just don't believe that I'm responsible."

She laughed thank God. "I will be sure to tell them dear." She kissed her child goodbye. "Jungkook is out, so you probably won't see him again tonight."

"Okay."

"I'll see you later, I love you." She kissed her other daughter. "Thank you dear." She was in a rush out the door.

"So Mina, you want to play a game?" You asked.

"No thanks." She said with no emotion and ran upstairs. "I guess it's just me and you."

"Trolls." She jumped down from the couch.

"Again? Aren't you sick of it?" She just shook her head.

You leaned down putting the movie in. You sat down on the couch and before you knew it, you were dozing off.

Once you woke up you noticed that Yuna was past out on the couch and it was 10:52. You picked her up putting her over your shoulder and carried her to her room and tucked her in. You opened Mina's room and saw her in bed as well.

You were lucky these kids were so well behaved. You saw no sign of Jungkook, maybe he was at that party.

When you could finally leave, you want straight home like you were suppose to.

"How'd it go?" Your father asked as soon as you entered your home.

"Good. The kids actually listen to me." You smiled and headed up stairs.

You waited until it was almost 11:30 to fool your parents and once you left your room you caught your parents on the stairs.

"Mom I just wanted to apologize for earlier and I really want to try harder, especially at waking up pretty early." You smiled. "So I just wanted to let you know I'm going to bed."

"Thank you sweetie, are you good to drive your sister for real this time?"

"Yes, I promise."

"Okay, goodnight." Both your parents said.

You went back to your room and ditched your sweats into a killer party outfit. You climbed out your window as quietly as possible and made your way down safely. You ran down the street as far away as possible and Jae was waiting for you at the end of the block.

....

"What the fuck took you so long?" Cas asked for the second time today.

"Is this Hoseok's house?" You looked around. "The last party was here right?"

"Yeah." She said handing you a drink.

"Didn't you used to date Hoseok?" Jen asked.

"No, I dated his best friend Namjoon."

"What happened?" Jae asked not even knowing this happened.

"He was too smart for me." She shrugged.

"(Y/N) look there's Jungkook." Jen pointed.

You looked over and saw him talking with a few guys in the corner of the room.

"That's Jungkook?" Cas asked. "Shit he's hot."

"He doesn't look like a junior." Jae said.

"I believe you have a bet to complete." Cas leaned forward and spoke into your ear.

"Can't I at least get another drink?" You asked already getting annoyed.

"Nope." She pushed you forward.

You turned back hesitant. "What's wrong (Y/N) you scared?" Cas arched her eyebrows.

"No." You snipped and walked over towards Jungkook with confidence.

Him and his friends glanced as you approached closer. "Hey (Y/N)." He smiled.

You didn't even speak before smashing your lips towards his. You felt so lost, that you didn't even hear the whistled coming from around you. You could feel the kiss getting deeper by the second, so as soon as Jungkook grabbed your hips bringing you closer, you had to pull away.

"Um." You blushed. "I'll see you later." You walked away nervously with a smile never leaving your face.

Jungkook just looked at you amused. He was speechless as his friends grabbed onto his shirt shaking him from his trance he had on you.

"You are such a slut." Cas said playfully.

You looked around the kitchen for a stronger drink. You grabbed a bottle of jack from under the sink and poured it into your cup.

"Is it just me guys or did (Y/N) enjoy that kiss too much?" Jen smirked.

"I bet not as much as him." You lied.

"Come on, you like it, look how red your face is." Jen continued.

"Do we have to tell Ryan?" Cas teased.

"I'm not even dating Ryan." You remarked.

"So he's just a causal fuck then?" Cas arched her eyebrows.

"Pretty much."

The thing with Ryan was he was some college guy you met some time ago and he seemed pretty cool at first, but the problem was he didn't treat you like you were his girl. He treated you like another guy friend, until he wanted you to satisfy his needs. You were pretty much done with him months ago, only if you were feeling desperate.

"So you want to date a junior?" Cas asked.

"I don't want to date anyone. We'll be out of this school anyway in three months, maybe it's time to focus on the last bit of fun we have." You ended with a smile.

"Woah, you scared me for a second there girl, acting all serious." Cas laughed and you chugged your drink.

You hated how chicken you were around your friends. You really did want to date Jungkook, that was clear. But the timing was too off, you will be leaving soon, hopefully to some decent school and he will still be here completing his senior year. They say long distance relationships never work and you felt like you don't even want to risk it.

"You guys are assholes." You rolled your eyes playfully.

Jae stared at you confused. She knew you were lying which really bugged her. You acted different around her then you did with the other girls. Like you were trying too hard to fit in.

....

The party was slowly dying which was cool since it was too crowded when you got there. "Hey ladies, you want a hit."

You were already pretty buzzed by the drinks but your right mind couldn't interfere. Cas smoked the first hit until it passed around to you. You passed to Jae once you were finished and she just passed it along, wanting nothing to do with it.

You stumbled over to the living room, almost tripping in your path. "Hey Kookie." You smirked grabbing his collar to pin you to the wall.

"Are you high?" He asked confused.

"Why would you say that?"

"Because I can smell it on you." He looked at you disappointed.

"Maybe you should take her home." Taehyung said concerned.

"Hey Kookie, remember when I gave you that hand job? We never finished." You pouted. His friends were taken back by your words.

"She's joking."

You grabbed his belt buckle and tried to undo it quickly. "Okay, I need to take you home." He grabbed your hands and put his jacket around your shoulders walking you out.

He gave you a bottle of water to at least get most of the alcohol out of your system.

He put you in his car and buckled you in and quickly went to the other side. You felt tired but not sleepy as you rested your head back on the seat.

He drove you home in pretty much silence except the dim sound of the radio playing. You were a lot different then he expected which was a little horrifying, but he still couldn't help but like you.

"I'm sorry." You spoke. "I shouldn't have even smoked that, I didn't know what it was."

"Haven't your parents always taught you to say no to drugs."

"Yeah, but it's not like it was my first time, but you would think I would learn from the first time from how horrible it was." You mumbled out.

"Well maybe you will learn from this time." He spoke.

"Don't hit that bear." You pointed.

"What bear?" He looked out the window.

"The one right there." You kept pointing. "Nevermind it flew away."

Jungkook laughed, but he felt guilty about it. "Please don't smoke anymore."

"I won't." You leaned your head on his shoulder.

"Not just that, I mean cigarettes to, that's not good for you."

Your hand slid down his chest until it collapsed in his lap. Luckily the drive was pretty short and the car stopped at his location. He was tempted to just bring you into his house since he knew he would have better luck sneaking you in.

You got out of the car and walked over to him as he checked to see if your door was unlocked. The drugs were wearing off but you still felt a little adventurous.

"Is this my house?"

"Yes." He answered. "Do you have a key?"

"Yeah." You shrugged.

"Where?"

"Inside." He rubbed his temple in distraught.

"My window is opened." You smiled.

He looked up. "Okay you stay here, and I'll climb up and unlock the front door."

"Stay here." He said again and he climbed up the tree that made it easy for you to sneak out of your room with.

You waved your hand in front of your face feeling extra warm. You tugged your dress down taking it off, so you could enjoy the breeze.

"Okay (Y/N) it's unl-" His eyes widen seeing you only in your underwear. "What are you doing?" He asked.

"I got hot."

He looked at you with a concerned but amused smiled. "This is nuts." He whispered as he carried you inside.

You laughed cutely as he carried you upstairs. "Shhh." He tried to keep you quiet.

"I cant help it, you are so cute." You snuggled into his neck.

Once he reached your room, he locked the door and gently placed you on your bed. He glanced at your alarm clock and noticed it was already 3 in the morning.

He was about to leave the room until you stopped him. "Please stay with me?"

Jungkook arched his eyebrows in confusion. "You will probably be confused if you see me in your bed in the morning."

"Being high doesn't make you lose your memory." You giggled. "I don't want to be alone."

Jungkook figure to give you want you want and sneak out later. He assumed you would probably fall sleep quickly anyway. "Okay."

Jungkook kicked off his shoes and turned around to place his phone on your dresser. Once he turned back around again he lost his breath seeing you completely naked.

He looked down avoiding it, almost feeling guilty. "Aren't you coming?" You asked.

"Do you own pajamas?" He asked still avoiding you.

"I do, but I feel so hot." Your tone was almost back to normal.

He looked around your room to find an over sized t-shirt. Once he found one he handed it over still covering his eyes.

"You're so cute....I'll wear this just for you."

He finally looked up to see you covered. He walked closer to your bed as you lay there. "You can't come in my bed wearing jeans."

"Why not?" He asked.

"Because, we were just at a sweaty party and they are probably covered in different types of dirt."

"Are you still high?" He asked.

"I don't think so." You honestly felt okay. The longest it last for is about 3 hours.

He took off his pants and crawled into the other side of your bed. He figured as soon as you fell asleep he would leave. "Is that iron man boxers I saw?"

He blushed and ignored your question. You moved your hand down feeling up his loose boxers. You started stroking him on the outside causing him to flinch and grab your hand.

"Go to sleep." He whispered.

"I'm sorry you had to take care of me. I promise that was probably my last party." You smiled. "If my mom finds out about this, I will probably be disowned." You said to his surprise quite sad.

"All I do is disappoint my parents and my little sister." You continued.

"I'm sure that's not true." He said closing his eyes.

"It is, I cant get up early to drive my sister to her practice, I always go out and party, that's the reason I have a 11 o'clock curfew. I will be lucky if I get into a community college with my grades, I'm always drinking or smoking-"

"You just need to show them that you care and that you're responsible."

"How do I do that?" You asked.

"For starters get to sleep so you can drive your sister."

You smiled gently and agreed. "Goodnight."

-

Jungkook woke up first and was surprised to see he was still in your room. He must of fallen asleep by accident. He saw you were still sound asleep. He pulled down the covers and blushed from your shirt riding up and how that was the only thing you were wearing. He covered you once again trying to get the dirty image out of his mind as well as the memory of last night.

He saw that is was only 10 o'clock. "(Y/N)?"

Your mother shouted and Jungkook froze. "What?" You shouted back but you were still asleep.

"Please wake up soon, I'm counting on you today." Was all she said and left you alone.

"(Y/N)?" He tried to tap you. "Psst."

"Huh?" You mumbled with your eyes still closed. You moved your hands and they found it's way to Jungkooks chest. You had no control from you still being out as a light.

You pulled him down to his surprise and he gently tried to loosen your hand to let go. You fluttered your eye open and saw him right above you looking down at your hand. You smiled remembering last night. You were happy he decided to stay with you all night.

He looked up for a second and you leaned up meeting him in the middle to crash your lips with his. He was taken back from the sudden action and smiled knowing that this was you and not under the influence.

He moved his hand up your thigh until it reached your hip.

He pulled away suddenly but you continued kissing down his neck. "Do you remember anything from last night?"

"Of course I do, being high doesn't make you lose your memory." You repeated your words from last night.

He leaned down kissing every inch of your neck. He moved his hand back up towards your hip but instead moved it further up your exposed body that rested under your loose tee.

You reached for his boxers once again but this time he didn't stop you. You palmed him outside of his boxers, feeling him get hard against your hand.

He went back to kissing you as you finally pulled him out quickly pumping him. You thought about the first night you were this close but now you didn't have an unexpected distraction.

He stopped for a second as his breathing picked up from you pleasuring him.

He pulled your shirt up to expose your moist clit as he gently rubbed his thumb through your folds causing yourself to squirm.

You started to gyrate against his thumb causing you to feel tingles throughout your body. You picked up the pace with your hand causing him to softly moan. He leaned down bringing his lips towards yours again sweetly.

You could tell he was close as his breathing became more unsteady. You pulled him down towards your clit as he reached his high. You rubbed his member against you as you let him release on top of you. You didn't want to risk a mess on your bed so you figure this was better.

You bit your lip from how sexy he looked, being so weak against your touch. He looked at you with lust in his eyes and you brought your hand up to your mouth licking it clean. He looked more weak as he watched you.

"I need to shower." You looked down at the mess that sat apon your stomach.

He was a blushing mess as you got up and you threw him his pants. You left your room and as soon as you reached the bathroom door you saw your sister brushing her teeth. She looked at you surprised that you were even awake before 11.

"How are you awake?" She asked.

"I went to bed early." You lied pushing your loose shirt to your stomach as you felt dripping. "I need to shower."

"Okay." She left and you had your quick shower. You went back to your room with Jungkook surprisingly still there. He was just sitting on your bed fully dressed with his phone in his hands.

"I'm gonna get going." He said blushing as you were only in a towel. "I have plans with my friends."

"Okay." You were about to lose your towel but Jungkook stopped you.

You giggled from his shyness. "Maybe I'll see you later? You're babysitting right?"

You grabbed his hand that kept your towel connected. "Yup. Your mom isn't off until tomorrow."

"Okay." He went to your window and climbed out.

You felt like you had never ending butterflies around him. You were about to get dressed until you heard a soft knock at your door.

You opened it revealing your little sister. "Why was Mina's brother here?" She asked.

"How do you know about that?" You asked in a panic.

"My room is right next to yours." She said like it was obvious.

"He was just making sure I got up because he didn't want to have to drive your annoying ass again." You quickly came up with.

"Why didn't he use the front door? Or just call?"

"Because it was locked and he doesn't have my number, can I get dressed?" You complained.

She walked away with a glare like she didn't believe you. Great not only is your mother on your case about everything and your friends on your case of who you like but now you got your little sister all suspicious.

Can't the world be in your favor? For just once.

But on the positive side, you couldn't wait to babysit tonight.

A/N: P.S if you don’t like the reader, no worries. I wanted to show that she was a trouble maker teen and I want the story to continue as Jungkook changing her a bit for the better. lol :)

[jinxthequeergirl]

The New Hero on The Block (pt.2/?)

Peter Parker x reader (Mentor! Strange x student! Reader)

Summary:after looking through the book And learning more you head to The source for more information

Warning: death of a side character.

pt.1 / pt. 2

~~~~~

"Helllooo!?" you pownded on the front door of the building from where the book came.

You spent two weeks reading the book front to back twice and even more time attempting to do what it said. All you got was a few sparks sometimes a quick glance into the kitchen. And you had to know more about it.

You where a curious person and always had to learn more. Books where the only thing you had growing up. You got a lot of them from your dad he would stay up and read to you and take you to book stores. Before he got to busy.

You held the book close to your chest as you continued to knock on the door. "Is anyone home!? I came to talk about a book I stole a few weeks ago!!"

Before your knucles could meet the wood of the door again it swung open and you punched the man who stood in the door way.

"Yes!?" He snapped looking extreamily irritated. He was tall, neat hair with a single white stripe on each side of his head and a neatly trimed beard.

"I...i uh wanted to ask you about this book!" you unzipped your coat and pulled the book free showing it to him.

"How did you get this!? He looked at you in awe and grabbed the book walking inside disregarding your exsistance.

"I..." you cleared your throat stepping inside after him and shut the door. "I stole...stole it a few weeks back. Along with this ring!...witch to be honest I thought was a pair of brass knuckles but after reading the book-"

He turned to you half way up the stairs.

"You stole this book and a sling ring! And on top of that you read it!? How did you even manage to get in here!?"

You pointed to the window on the top floor you came through that night. "The window..." He looked at the book while offering an open hand. "The ring please."

"Actually...I was hopeing you could could teach me what's in that book! I mean I've almost got that sling ring thing down or whatever-"

"Why because you think it's some cool trick you want to impress all your friends with some magic!?" you scoffed and followed him up the stairs. "Well what do you use it for!?"

"I use it to protect people like you! From threats you can't see!"

"So what your like a superhero!?" judging by his strange blue kimono like outfit it was either that or he couldn't afford anything else. "Something of the sort."

You looked inside one of the glass containers. One you swore had something in it a week ago. "Cool!" He looked at you over his shoulder as he placed the book on the shelf. "So maybe you could teach me how to be a superhero too!"

"How old are you!?"

"Old enough!"

"Listen I'm not going to teach some child everything I know because they think being a 'super hero' is cool! Know give me the ring and leave!" You squinted your eyes and him and pursed your lip.you never believed in superheros if they exsisted why not hadle the people after your mom? Why not save her? If they exsisted and really where the good guys where where they when someone was really in danger. You slid the ring on your finger in your pocket and smirked. "Listen I may be young and may not have all the facts or a proper motive-"

"Your a criminal! Now the ring! Please!"

You smirked pulling your hand from your pocket and thought long and hard about being at home while making a side circle with your hand. "What do you think your doing!?"

You grinned when a large hole appered showing the street outside your apartments. "Leaving like you asked! And your right I'm not a hero stupid of me to think that!"

"Wait no-" you jumped through the portal and landed on the ground rolling. The portal shut behind you. "Son of a-" you hissed as you pushed yourself up realizing you landed on your writst.

"(y/n)!?" you looked up and sat your dad making his way to you. "Dad?" he was a meidium hight man with a very thin body and round glasses that framed his face making him look like a cartoon character. "What are you doing here you are never home this earily."

"Yes well..." his scentence trailed off into an awful cough. "My boss was consented for my health." you smiled and walked with him inside. "Why dont we have a good family dinner? Catch me up on what's happening!"

"Ok! We can order out or-" he stopped in the hall looking at your apartment door and stepped in front of you blocking your veiw. "Why dont you run to the market...here pick out a dinner we can cook together!" He handed you money and sent you back down the hall. "Uh ok.." she hurried down to the market in search of dinner.

~

You sat in front of the store before going in pulling some goze from your bag. You wrapped up your wrist and hand and headed inside.

You took no less than ten moments to pick out a few good things to make before heading back. Being stopped by a fire truck heading in the same direction. You looked up following the truck to see fire of course rising from your building.

"Dad!" you raced after the truck pushing past the the crowed of people. "Dad!?" you looked around holding he had gotten out in time but saw no sight of him. "God damn it!" you grabbing your mask and ran to the front door of the building. "Hey! Hey miss!" you shoved the fireman out of the way and dove into the building.

"Dad!?" the building was at the same time brightly light by the orange flames but deeply dark do to the thick smoke that took over the air. You coughed as you pulled your mask on a long with your hood pulling the stings so it was tightly on and ran up the stairs. "Dad! Where are you!?"

"Help! Help me!" you perked up and turned to a door that no longer sat properly on it's hinges and slid across it. "Hello?"

"Over here!" you turned to a girl few years younger than you and her little brother huddled under a dinning table barrely standing. You ran over to them and flipped it off the top of them.

"C'mon!" you grabbed the little boy and the girls hand. And ran over to the window.

"Ok wait right here hold your brother! And cover yourselves!" she took him and ducked away from you. You kicked the window shattering it and pulled your grappling hook from your bag. And sat it in the window.

And dumped out the rest of the contents of your bag. "Here!" one of the rooms finally collapsed from beside you and the two scrame. "Hey get it's ok!" her brother was small enough to fit in your bag considering it was a large bag. You put him in it making sure he was succure. Another part collapesed and you jumped. "Here take your brother and climbe down the rope!"

"What!?"

"Go!" she slowly but surely grabbed hold of the rope and climbed out the window looking at you worried. "I promise you I'll stay right here and hold it in place."

She nodded and slowly let herself fall down the rope. "Look!" someone from the crowd yelled and pointed up at the three of you. She wiggled down it slowly slipping slightly here and there. You realized the fiermen had pulled out something for them to land on and the amount of rope was wearing thin. "Jump!"

"No!" you groaned and looked back down at her. "You need to drop your brother then jump!" she furrowed her brows. "Now!" something crashed from within the building. You watched as she shrugged your bag off her shoulders sending her brother down screaming.he landed with a soft poof. The rope was slowly wearing down.

"Jump now!" she shook her head. You pulled your sleeve over your hand and grabbed a shard of glass and slashed the rope. "I'm sorry!"

"No!" she too landed safely down below and you ran out of that apartment and into the hall dashing straight to your apartment kicking the door open with easie. "Dad!? Daddy are you in here!?"

She looked around stepping on something. You stooped down to pick it up and placed it in your coat pocket. There was sudden movement from within the house. "Dad?" the person ran fast across your vision you grabbed a part of a chair and flung it at him stunting him momentarily. "Who-" the roof collapes on the right side of your apartment you jumped back. "Who are you!?"you took note of there clean suite and has mask, they said nothing and ran at you with a knife. "Shi-" He tackeled you knocking you good and mask off. As if it knew the smoke emidently filled your lungs causing you to wheeze as you attempted to push the man off. the window shattered and the man was was sent flying into the flames across the room.

"Are you ok?" you looked up to see none other than New York's very own spiderman. "Uh yea its just my dad I can't-" the door way collapesed. "You shouldn't be in here we need to go!"

"Not with out my-" he grabbed you and ran to the window throwing you out and jumping out after you before catching you in his web And pulling you up into his arms. You looked over his shoulder and watched the top of the building burst and collapse completely. The two of you landed on the ground near an ambulance and you continued to state into the buildings flames as a paramedic lead you away from spider-man. "Take care of her doc.." you sat staring blankly. You didnt save him...you didn't find him at all. Instead you wasted time helping some kids you didn't know.

"Excuse me miss?" you looked up slowly and found the girl and little boy standing in front of you. The girl smiled and said nothing but wrapped you up in a tight hug. "Thank you!" it took you a moment to realize what was happening and slowly hugged her back sighing lightly into her hair. "Any time kid..."

"How are you holding up?" you looked up at spiderman as the siblings left. He sat next to you in the back of the ambulance. "Hey what you did was...was increadible...even if you couldn't save-"

You tuned him out realising something. Those kids where alive because you choice to save them instead of looking for your father first. "Hey yea...I get it you cant save everyone..." you looked up at the kids as there mother enguolfed them in a hug sobbing.

"Even of you really want to...things don't work out that way."

~~~~

Tagging:

@cutie1365

@roryshitposts

[richneds-blog]

a little reddie for u all

-when they were about 16 richie and eddie had both decided they wanted to move out of derry, together… they just hadn’t talked to each other about it.

-they had been best friends for fucking ages. eddie sort of fell for Richie when he was 14, and richie did the same.

-days turned into months, which turned into years of Richie tease-flirting with eddie, and the two of them being overly affectionate with each other, not thinking of them being anything more than ‘best friends’

-it wasn’t until bev said anything to Richie that he realised he’d fallen head over heels in love with his best friend.

-they were having a smoke together when she nonchalantly asked ‘so have you kissed him yet?’

-‘sorry, who is it that i’m kissing marsh?’

-‘um, eddie?’

-Richie’s breath hitched mid drag, causing him to start coughing on his cigarette

-‘what the fuck’ *cough* ‘huh?’

-after that Richie paid extra attention to eddie,

-he can’t believe he hadn’t noticed he liked eddie sooner himself. if everyone else had figured it out then maybe eddie had too

-when they were 16, Richie decided that he had enough. he was gonna tell eddie how he felt

-so he had it all planned out. he knew exactly what he was gonna say and how. organised&confident!richie

-you know on one of those nights, (obviously… it cant be reddie w/o Richie climbing thru eddie’s window at one in the morning) Richie carefully climbed through the unlocked window to eddie’s room, trying to be quiet to not wake mrs kaspbrak down the hall

-which of course involved Richie awkwardly pulling himself over the window-sill, tripping over his own feet and making a clatter before carefully pushing himself back up off the floor and sweeping his long curls off his face

-eddie was sitting on his bed shirtless reading a book, his beside lamp turned on, illuminating his face in the most flattering ways

-cue panicking&nervous!richie

-he took one look at eddie and everything he had planned went straight out the window he came in

-rich didn’t even give eddie time to say hello before he just

-“eddie i think im fucking in love with you”

-and eddie was shocked

-obviously not shocked at what he said but at the pure abruptness of it all

-well he was a little bit shocked because jesus Christ Richie likes me back wtfffff wtf wtf WTF

-so he did what any normal human being would do in the middle of an awkward situation

-he just started quietly, kinda psychotically, chuckling to himself

-like quick laughs in between really short breaths

-tbh Richie thought eddie was having an asthma attack

-“ohhhh shit oh shit okay fuck um its okay you don’t need to say anything i knew you wouldn’t feel the same i knew you couldn’t me back its fine, just can we please pretend this never happened ohhhhh fuck why did i do this, it was a bad idea from the beginning, fuck you marsh oh my g”

-eddie was just staring at Richie now, this huge blabbering mess like… what the fuck is going on.

-but Richie wouldn’t stop talking so eddie made his way over and off the bed, walked over to Richie and just put his hand over his mouth so he’d stop talking

-“jesus chee, shut the fuck up would you?”

-and Richie just mumbles an almost incoherent ‘okay’ from underneath eddie’s hand

-“calm down, its fine because i… love you as well”

-and Richie shoulders just un tense x1000 and hes like oh fuck i just embarrassed myself but its okay because eDDIE LIKES ME BACK FUCK YES MOTHERFUCKERS THANK YOU MARSH

-*still mumbling against eddie’s hand* “you do?”

-“yeah, I love you Richie”

-“cool… can i kiss you”

-“sorry what? I couldn’t hear that”

-“can I kiss you?”

-“sorry, hold on” (and just takes his hand off richie’s mouth)

-and as he does Richie just fuckin grabs eddies waist and pulls him into him and just, kisses him.

-and its sweet and its passionate and its everything they both hoped it would be

-and they just melted into each other

-and were both so fucking happy

-when they started dating none of the losers were even surprised, and they all knew every detail of what happened because eddie wouldn’t stop talking about it for the first MONTH

-“and he just went so fucking red and he looked so embarrassed but it was okay because he didn’t know what i knew which was that”

-“you loved him back, yeah we fucking get it eddie. tbh NONE of us are surprised. its been a fucking month now”

-but now fast forward to them STILL dating and they’re just about leaving school, and they both know they wanna get the fuck out of derry

-and when they talk to each other about it they decide they want to move to New York

-they got this cute little apartment in the city  

-and it’s absolutely gorgeous

-the night of moving day, they’re just sitting on a bunch of pillows arranged in the living room, Richie has his arm around eddie’s shoulders and they’re just sitting on the floor. just looking around at all the unpacked boxes around them

-there isn’t any furniture because Richie fucked up the dates they were moving with the moving guys

-“rich are you sure you want to organise the movers for us?”

-“yes eds, i’m sure i can do that. don’t you trust me?”

-there’s this big ass window in their living room/kitchen that looks over the city streets and all the lights from outside are flashing and they’re just cuddling on the floor feeling so content

-and they pull out heaps of pillows and blankets and just create a makeshift bed on the floor, and fall asleep in each others arms, feeling so fucking happy

-over the next few days, they finish unpacking, they have the furniture set up and they begin to decorate here and there

-and everything just feels so… right

-like they’re so happy to have moved out of the hellhole they lived in and just are feeling pure bliss because they can barely believe they managed to end up here living together

-Richie wants to get a ping pong table and put it in the kitchen

-but eddie doesn’t agree with that

-“look eds there’s SOOO much space”

-“Richie we aren’t having a ping pong table in our fucking kitchen”

-one morning when eddie wakes up, he realises that Richie isn’t in bed with him

-he sits up, feeling very confused, until he pulls himself out of bed

-he smells something really delicious and hes just like

-????????

-and walks out to the kitchen to see Richie shirtless, cooking breakfast, softly singing along to a song that’s playing over the radio

-and eddie just smiles to himself because look at my boyfriend, he’s gorgeous

-they’re build pillow forts in the living room and curl up watching movies when it’s raining outside

-“you can never be too old for a pillow fort babe”

-and sometimes Richie falls asleep on eddie’s lap while eddie plays with his hair

-Richie still plays guitar

-sometimes when eddie comes home from uni or work, Richie is already home and he’s sitting in the living room playing and singing

-sometimes he writes songs about eddie which makes eddie absolutely melt

-and when either of them has a bad day, they do whatever they can to make the other relaxed

-like cooking a nice dinner, running them a bath

-when eddie’s stressed or angry, Richie knows he doesn’t want to talk so he’ll give eddie gentle hugs and forehead kisses

-and he’ll play his guitar

-and when richie’s upset or having a bad day, eddie will sit down with him and talk. just talk. about nothing and everything all at once

-and eddie will play with richie’s hair which they both love

-also expect SPONTANIOUS ROMANTIC DINNERS

-like cute candle lit dinners with homemade food

-and even though they’ve been best friends since they were 13, and they know absolutely everything there is to know about each other, they still stay up all night talking about things

-they talk about themselves, or whats happening, how they’re feeling, they talk about deep shit like their fears and what they want for breakfast tomorrow morning

-and sometimes they’ll climb up the fire escape and sit on the roof

-they still see the losers regularly, switching between their place and bill & stan’s

-(YEAH I KNOW IM A SUCKER FOR STENBROUGH)

-bev ended up with ben and they decided they wanted to live in Europe, because its gorgeous there. plus bev has never been to paris,

-mike got a football scholarship at college and is living on campus

-so they don’t see them as much as they see bill and stan

-but all the losers get together in the holidays for thanksgiving, Christmas and new years and it’s just a big fucking party

-because u know what they say,,,,, friends who have shared trauma, stay together!!11!!!1!!

-reddie always orders a shit tonne of take out food because sometimes they’re too tired to cook

-“Richie we can’t have thai for the third night in a row, if i even smell it i reckon i’ll throw up, and i’ll throw up all over your new shirt”

-they have a joint closet in their room and eddie always steals richie’s sweaters because he likes how they’re too big for him, plus they smell of Richie

-and overall they’re just largely in love and they’re happy

-and fuck off IT never returns, stan never takes a bath, eddie never dies and RICHIE AND BILL ARE THE BEST MANS AT EACH OTHER’S WEDDING AND THEY LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER

[classic-rock-roller]

1. You come home one day to hear excited whispering through the door. You open it and see Kevin and Randy sitting on the couch, looking suspiciously unbusy. Before you even ask what’s going on, a German Shepherd puppy jumps over the back of the couch and runs up to you. You glance up at them and Kevin bursts out excitedly “We got a puppy!” How do you respond?

“Aww, he’s so cute! What’s his name? Although the two of you are potty training him and footing the bill from the landlord for keeping the dog.”

2. You are attempting to make dinner for Nikki, Tommy and Kevin, your roommates. Something along the way went horribly wrong, and you managed to set off the smoke alarms. They all rush into the kitchen to see what happened, only to see you looking sheepish and confused in the middle of it. What happens next?

They most likely help me turn off the smoke alarms and then help me with dinner because I’m a pretty good cook I just sometimes don’t get recipes right entirely. 

3. You and Crue are assigned an interesting project for film class. Somehow, Tommy got put in charge of writing the script, and the characters are Gordon Ramsay, Dean Winchester, Santa Claus, and Ozzy Osbourne. Who films and who plays who?

Tommy would play Gordon Ramsay because I think he’d like to yell a lot. I can see Mick playing Ozzy don't ask me why. I can see Vince play dean and Nikki playing Santa Clause. (Was Tommy high when he came up with those characters or something?)

4. You get home to see Kevin, Nikki, and Duff making dinner. You don’t think anything of it, until after about fifteen minutes. You hear Duff scream in pain, “AUGH, YOU BASTARD.” You rush back to the kitchen to find that he’s got a steak knife in his arm. What do you do?

“What the fuck happened? Why does Duff have a steak knife in his arm? Did one of the two of you stab him with it?” I’d then pile the three of them into my car to take Duff to the hospital all while lecturing about the importance of kitchen safety. 

5. You and GNR go out to buy a Christmas tree. Who tries to climb every single one, who is dissatisfied with them all, who is already complaining about needles in the carpet, who jokingly pretends the tree is a lady only to get a mouthful of pine needles, and who sighs and picks one up to drag it to the checkout area?

Steven tries to climb every one, Axl is dissatisfied with every one, slash complains about the needles, Duff gets a mouth full of pine needs, and Izzy just sighs and drags one to the checkout area.  

6. Crue and OG Quiet Riot as high school stereotypes?

Tommy, Nikki, and Kevin--the jocks 

Vince--in with the popular girls 

Randy and Mick--book smart kids 

Drew and Rudy--band kids 

7. You and Crue are out to dinner. Who orders for the group, who changes their order last minute, who can’t decide (and always ends up getting the same thing anyway so the debate is always moot), who orders a sundae as an appetizer, and who always gets stuck footing the bill?

Tommy always orders for the group. 

I always change my order last minute 

Vince cant decide (*me to Vince* ”Oh my god Vince just fucking pick something.” “I will this is a very important decision.” “Vince, it’s fucking food. just fucking pick something.” Fine! I’ll get the chicken.” *under my breath* “He gets that every fucking time. I don’t  know why we have to go through this.”)

Nikki orders the sundae as an appetizer 

and Mick usually ends up footing the bill but sometimes I do too.    

8. You’re walking around your neighborhood one sunny day when you pass by Kevin, mowing his lawn. You glance at him, see he is absorbed in what he's doing. A moment later you hear him scream, “Son of a BITCH”. You turn back to see he’s fallen and is spewing profanities like a fire hydrant. What do you do?

I run over to him to make sure he’s ok. If he’s hurt and it’s not too serious I’d say “Hold on I have a first aid kit back at my house.” If it’s serious, I’d drive him to the ER and wait for him to be taken care of so that I can drive him back home. 

9. You and Nikki meet Tommy and Vince for lunch one day. As you sit down, Nikki says “Man, my legs are so sore.” Vince casually asks “Why?” Nikki looks at you to tell the story, and you flush out of embarrassment. Without missing a beat, Tommy shouts “OH MY GOD DID YOU GUYS FUCK OH MY GOD VINCE THEY TOTALLY DID.” You don’t have the courage to tell them that Nikki’s legs are sore because you two went to JumpStreet for 4 hours. How do you two proceed?

I’d flush and stutter even more and then go no...we didn’t do that. We just went to JumpStreet for four hours... to which both Tommy and Vince would look at us and go “Uh-huh” I’d just let them go if they don’t want to know the truth so be it.  

10. You get on a plane to head out to see some extended family. You are seated next to Tommy, who looks like he’s been awake for a week. As soon as you’re in the air, he passes out on your shoulder. Do you move him or leave him be?

I’d leave him be. He seemed really tired and if he can get any sleep that’s important I wouldn’t want to risk waking him. 

11. You get home to see Nikki sitting on the couch with his arms outstretched. “What are you doing?” You ask him. “Cuddle me, you weirdo.” He says. How do you proceed?

I’d go cuddle him. Why wouldn’t I do that?

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1. You are roommates with Stephen Pearcy and because of his long hair, it constantly clogs the sink. Every time he complains about cleaning it you usually respond with, “We live together. You can’t blame this on anyone else.” One time when you say this, he leaves the bathroom and locks you in. What do you do?

2. After getting your little puppy with Randy, he is ecstatic and constantly is carrying the dog or the dog is yipping and following him around. One day while you’re making dinner, he comes up behind you and wraps his arms around you. After a minute or two he starts kissing your neck, so you turn around and look at him. “What’s all this about?” he says, “Think about it. The little patter of children in our home.” How do you respond?   

3. You and Warren live together in an apartment. It’s the middle of summer and it’s extremely hot and you’re in a drought. Both you and Warren are pretty much melting on the couch even though all of the windows are open. All of a sudden Warren gets up. “Where are you going?” “I want to take a shower so you should probably join me. It’ll save water.” How do you respond?   

4. You came home early from work to find a note from Randy telling you that he was out and he’d be back later. Ok, not a problem, you wait up for him until about ten o’clock. But you have to get up at about six in the morning, so you go to bed. At about midnight you feel the bed dip beside you and roll over, “It's midnight! Where the hell were you? You had me fucking worried!” Where was he? 

5. You’re walking down the stairs with Randy when all of sudden you trip. Randy catches you and asks if you’re ok to which you respond that you are, but you wait until you think he is out of earshot before muttering, “Except for my dignity.” Randy turns around and says, “That’s ok, I like that I caught you and not someone else.” How do you respond?

6. You’re getting ready for bed without Randy because he’s going to be out late with Kevin. All of a sudden you feel arms wrap around your waist and instinctively you hit the person which causes them to fall onto the bed. When you turn around you see it’s Randy and he’s holding his nose. What do you do?

7. Randy’s been really sick lately and stuck up in bed. Whenever he gets chills or gets uncomfortable with sour muscles you either cuddle with him or give him a massage and every time he says, “But you’re going to get sick. I don’t want to make you sick.” How do you respond?   

8. You have headphones in your ears and are dancing around the kitchen and singing, making dinner to one of your favorite songs. Randy opens the door and calls you and after not hearing you he goes to investigate. He finds you in the kitchen and decided to learn up against the doorway. It’s another two or three minutes before you realize he’s there and when you pull your earbuds out he says, “I like when you dance. You’re good.”  How do you respond?

9. Kevin is over at your’s and Randy's house for dinner, Randy says something that makes you blush and Kevin says, “Aww, you’re so sweet and cute and precious.” “I AM NOT SWEET. I AM DARK AND MYSTERIOUS AND DANGEROUS.” Then you do a tiny kitten sneeze. And Randy wraps his arm around you. “Awww, how cute.” How do you respond to Kevin?

10. While over at Kevin and Randy’s house you have your sketchbook out and are drawing Randy. Kevin comes over and asks what you’re drawing. You instinctively hide it which makes him want to see it more. He grabs it from you, “Oh this looks nice. I’m going to go show Randy.” He starts to head out the door. What do you do?

11.  Randy wants to wake up extra early to do something but he’s having trouble getting you out of bed. “Just get up. It’s not that hard!” You pull the covers off you. “No, I’m hibernating.” and then go back under. “Well, it’s not that cold out and you’re not even an animal.” Again you pull back the cover. “I can be what I want to be.” “Just get out of bed.” “NO.” “That’s it.” and Randy picks you up. What do you do?

@osbournebemydaddy, your move.