#tOoK kArKaT's GeNeTiC mAtErIaL

[snowtimeisbesttime]

Thoughts and questions (remix) on Friendsim Volume 6.

Kuprum & Folykl:

>mfw another james roach track // Link removed just in case; it led to the panel in Homestuck page 7205.

-We now have extra confirmation that psionic energy is produced in the eyeballs. What we don’t know is if loss of both eyes (as in, in an accident or an “accident”) can cause voidrot (Cirava lost their psionics (?) when they gouged out their eye, while Sollux could use his after losing his eyes- voidrot probably wasn’t A Thing back then though).

-Kuprum is sort of a spiritual successor to Mituna; not only does he have the 4chan shtick like him, he wants to become pretty much the next Psiioniic and therefore his literal successor.

-When push comes to shove we see Kuprum chooses Folykl (the obvious and best choice) rather than the Empire. Now let’s hope these two never ever find themselves in a situation like that again please.

-Like seriously, Folykl is more cullable to a drone than a fucking alien. Does Kuprum seriously think that Trizza “bombed a fucking town for a selfie bg*” Tethis or whoever owned his theoretical ship would let her stick around? Would he even be able to give her energy if he had an entire spaceship draining his powers? Can we get these two to Earth C ASAP?? // on foly being canonically more cullable than MSPAR: in Karkat's PQ route they Do ping drones' Murder Sensors, by way of having too high a body temperature. Seeing as Joey *seems* to be doing just fine with the troll disguise we've seen in Act 2 screenshots so far, which doesn't even have a way to disguise her human skintone, leads me to believe that SHE'S going to be the last straw that would eventually lead to the “all these fuckers around 37ish ºC Must Die Horribly” status quo in Alterniabound's time.

-Joey's disguise not involving gray paint of some sort also kinda sticks out, because the one color her skin canonically can't be is troll gray... guess we'll see how that plays out in Act 2 proper. There's also the possible implications of her wearing Dammek's sign (those implications being identity theft, unless it doesn't matter because he's bronze and Alternia sucks ass, as well as the fact that at least some of the troll call guys ought to know Dammek, and trolls having the same sign is sort of a Big Fucking Deal that we've only seen with ancestor – descendant pairs so far...)

*is it ever explicitly mentioned if Trizza knew that Dammek, Xefros and perhaps more rebels lived in Outglut? I’m pretty sure she knew, but she’s petty enough to bomb a random town

-What were they going to do to the Random Bluebloods?

-Folykl's Troll Call bulletpoints were basically reworded and little else, while Kuprum's weren't changed.

Elwurd:

-Elwurd is gr8.

-“There must be some cultural context that makes them turn to a fake relationship for security”, such as “get into a relationship and provide genetic material or die”

-So what happened between Elwurd and Bronya? If we ever find out it’ll have to be in Hiveswap Act 2 (or in another spinoff)… Neither of them seem to be quite over it, though it never came up in any of Bronya’s routes. (i feel it probably has to do with what Elwurd said, “nice trolls never change”) // Bronya likely didn't tell Elwurd she was a cloistered jade, at the very least.

-Apparently jadebloods also get sent off to space?? On the one hand I get why because the Sufferer’s entire rebellion was only possible thanks to the Dolorosa, but in the other hand I’m pretty sure it was mentioned in Homestuck that almost all adult trolls leave Alternia? However, Doc Scratch said that the Condesce sent everyone but the children to space after the Summoner’s rebellion, so rest in pieces headcanon that jadebloods stay in the caverns their whole life (201?-2018). You will be used in AUs.

-Does the Condesce have the jade kids just do cavern stuff until they get conscripted then?? Is that what jade school is?? // only a select few jade kids, apparently.

-As far as I can tell, Elwurd’s poster with the two (?) jadebloods says Make Out, while the CD says Kayroa. The last poster was too far away for me.

-If slam poetry is rap, then excessive bodily force poetry is…?

-Elwurd's new Troll Call bulletpoints completely replace her older ones (as in they're totally different) and reinforce her Friendsim characterization, particularly her use of many aliases and her dealing drugs. The last bulletpoint references MSPAR's crush on her in her route, but might kinda imply something regarding Joey? Like, we know she likes girls and is probably going to realize and come to terms with it in Alternia...

*special mention to her not being stated to have her shit together anymore, nor knowing your mom, which many of us took to mean she somehow met A. Claire through Snek Portal Shenanigans on the latter's part. If being a Vriska as in character concept refers to being sort of a real fucking jerkass with a tragic backstory and/or reason for being such a dick that involves being forced to do horrible stuff since a very young age by an external influence (read: vaska herself and ardata) then... elwurd seems to still not be a vriska?? wait does that make trizza a vriska or. Is there trizzacourse in alternia

-also going by the other aliases as seen in the new troll call thingy it seems like she's the embodiment of “be gay do crime”

[fantroll-purgatory]

@itoshiki​

hello! im submitting my sort-of-trollsona-but-not-really. I made him I guess more Alternian and he’s highly personal 2 me but that shouldn’t discourage you! I’m stuck at some parts because I just recently got back into homestuck and I’d like advice from someone who knows their stuff. IT’S SO LONG IM SO SORRY… Thank you so much if you do review it tho!

Hey no worries. Thanks for your patience!

Hell yeah hell yeah ceruleanbloods with Eye Stuff.

World: Alternia, maybe an AU? I’m unsure. But he’s Alternian.

Name: Sancti Serpus

“Sancti” comes from “Saint” and his belief that he can do no wrong, as well as how he believes that his experiments benefit troll society. “Serpus” comes from “Serpent” and his personality being sly and manipulative, could be described as a snake by others in the way he is first nice to his friends but backstabs them later, as well as his lusus being a two-headed Titanoboa (prehistoric Boa).

I understand the reasoning behind the first name! If you want something that plays a little more into the archetypal Mad Scientist “I will become a GOD AHAHAHAHA” vibe then I suggest Apoteu from the Greek apotheoun, meaning “to make a god of.” Still fits his beliefs about himself and how he benefits society…but there is such a thing a vengeful, malevolent god.

I like the serpent theme, especially given the Rod of Asclepius/Caduceus confusion, given that the former is about medicine and the latter about commerce. Plus snake oil salesman as duplicitous people claiming they have a cure when they’re really just selling you whatever they could dig up. Serpus is a little too obvious as a snake troll though, so maybe we abstract that a bit. A slightly silly one would be Davdav, since the longest-living two-headed snake is named Double Dave after its discoverer.

Apoteu Davdav. It has the opposite of a nice ring to it, but I like it because it sounds kind of mad sciencey.

Age: 7.5 Sweeps (16 Human Years)

Theme/Story: His theme is sort of Mad Scientist vibes. He dabbles in forensic pathology, chemistry (even though he often explodes things), troll biology/genes and psychology. Those are his main 5 branches because he’s not very good at math so his knowledge of physics is limited.

fugidghiuuaehiu Bad At Math Science Gang RISE UP

He was hatched and went through The Brooding Caverns. He decided to settle on a Hive in the outskirts of a city, in a suburban area with only a few highblooded neighbors. However, his lusus was very, very hard to feed for the two heads would often argue with and attack each other. His lusus would feed on anyone who visited or came too close, by asphyxiating them. It also neglected him and didn’t pay attention to him for it was too busy fighting with itself. He eventually learned to sedate his lusus through aromatherapy, with chemicals he himself created in his lab. He lives on a huge castle-like hive near a forest where he gets the material for his experiments and corpses to analyze. He has a bunch of body parts in flasks and bottles.

He is a very strange troll, but he doesn’t want to be. Due to his upbringing and his lusus eating whoever came over. He often saw culling, death and destruction near him, which caused him to have a morbid fixation on death and a desire to better troll society through science, influenced by his ancestor Discordi Discipla (he’s a WIP). However, he has fallen victim to his own mental deterioration and apathy as he spent more time around the dead (and undead). This mental deterioration was exacerbated when a presumed dead corpse came to life in his lab and attacked him, causing him blindness in his right eye. He’s somewhat afraid of being culled for his blindness, but knows that it’s not likely, due to his highblood status.

This is pretty good and comprehensive!

Due to his childhood where he didn’t have control over what his lusus did, he now wants to have control over everything in his life. This makes him a very controlling and manipulative person, bent on doing anything to get his way even if it means experimenting on his lowblooded friends. He doesn’t necessarily like hurting others and doesn’t mean to, Alternian society and his own visions of violence has just made him apathetic. This apathy as well as his low self-worth stemming from his neglect has made him have tons of unhealthy relationships, as well as has made him a perfectionist and narcissist. Despite his supposed belief that the end justifies the means and he’s going to make troll society better, he doubts himself and has an inferiority complex.

His mental deterioration has made him a very unstable troll to be around. He’s still a good troll at heart, however the odds are in disfavor due to his blood color causing him to look down on others lower on the hemospectrum and his own childhood. He does things mainly on impulse and suffers from strange hallucinations and visions of the future ever since he was blinded on his right eye. He’s learned to cope with them and they don’t necessarily harm him, but they do cause him significant distress.

He also has a lot of scars from laboratory incidents, and his neighbors hate him.

fjiodshfuo yeah if my neighbor kept making ungodly noises and murdering people with abandon I may also have a beef with them.

Review Goals: General Overview please! Strife Specibus:

Chemicalkind. He carries around various noxious chemicals to use as he pleases, but sometimes they irritate his eyes when he uses them. He can handle it almost all of the time though. He throws them in bottles and that’s how he fights.

I know I *just* suggested this for my most recent review but bottlekind fits here too because if he runs out of chemicals he can just break a bottle off on a nearby surface and stab someone with the broken glass it’s fun it’s easy it’s free.

Fetch Modus:  I kind of took the idea from a mspa fetch modus entry, since I’m bad at coming up with fetch moduses. It’s unoriginal I know, but I genuinely couldn’t think of anything.

Periodic Table Modus.

It requires Sancti to remember his elements, as he needs to remember them for when he’s working and therefore it helps him but also inconveniences him as he can forget them.

This is how it works:

When an item is captchalogued, a quick calculation is checked to see the size of that item. If it is lower than 190x190, the size of the item is totalled and placed on a slot on the fetch modus that corresponds to the periodic table number. 

For example, an item that is 4 in by 2 in would total to 6, and be in the position of Carbon on the table.

Sancti would then have to open the periodic table modus, which would open as an actual metaphysical table, and retrieve the item.

It is blank, with 118 spaces.

This fetch modus is a little confusing to me as well, and your poor math challenged troll likely also finds it difficult.

…but I think I have an idea that keeps with the spirit *and* the confusion while generating some good old Modus Shenanigans. What about an ORBITAL MODUS, with items filling in in each new category as an electron shell would? All items in the outermost shell would be immediately accessible, with deeply nested items remaining inaccessible until the outer shells were emptied.

Like this. Which is perfect for your chemist troll.

Blood Color: Ceruleanblood/Cobaltblood.

Lunar Sway: Derse, because he is dissatisfied with himself.

Derse and Prospit assignations don’t necessarily have to do with how one feelings about *themselves!* Karkat is Prospit and Nepeta is Derse, which reflects the fact that Karkat has accepted the hemospectrum as the way things have to be despite the horrors it inflicts on him, while Nepeta is extremely happy to be herself, but constantly snipes Equius for kowtowing to the hemospectrum. Even Equius is a Dersite, since he doesn’t agree with the hemospectrum so much as develop a really disturbing fixation over the following and subversion of it.

Given that your troll actively uses the hemospectrum to his advantage and delights in doing so, I’d argue he’s a Prospitan!  Title: I’m unsure if I want to make them a sylph of light or a sylph of space, I’m actually not sure at all what they should be.

Between forensic pathology and genetics and chemistry and being attacked by a zombie and feeling he knows best he’s actually coming off VERY much as a Life player to me. Since you’re bouncing between two Sylph classpects I’m happy to keep that title as long as we acknowledge he’s not currently very good at it :P.

Symbol and Meaning: The symbol for purification by burning. He’s my first troll in the session I want to make. It kind of has the meaning of spiritual cleansing or purifying something that is not pure. In this case I think it relates to Sancti’s personal growth that will happen through the session, reflecting how he has to better himself through painful events.

If we go by the EZ, his sign would be Scorsci, Sign of the Fixer. Which is certainly what he sees himself as! I’ll see if I can play with the symbol you gave him and incorporate the Scorpio M into it.

Handle: gravesideAnopsia

Anopsia is a defect in the visual field or blindness, and graveside refers to how he got his blindness.

We definitely see trolls with retroactively foreshadowy trolltags, but I can’t think of a reason for him to have picked Anopsia before his blinding. What about gravesideConjunct, since he sees himself as the connective tissue between the dead and the living? Which can become retroactively ironic when his eye putrifies after it comes into contact with necrotic tissue, which is basically an extreme version of conjunctivitis.

Quirk: ~~( he types…. zzz….. taking… his time…. with words… and….types in caps when he…..wants to zzz…. ASSERT HIS POINT….)~~

Love this quirk he’s a sleeby boy.

He either keysmashes to laugh as “eoeoeoe” “sksksks” or simply laughs like “haha” or “hehe”. He also uses the following emoji    :)-< and (－‸ლ)

Special Abilities: None, unless you count his visions of the future. But he wasn’t born with psychic abilities.

Idk that he even needs visions of the future tbh. Injury does not always confer abilities in troll society.

Lusus/Guardian: A 2-headed Titanoboa (think of a huuuuuge prehistoric Boa, even bigger than an Anaconda). He considers himself to have two dads as the two heads have separate brains. He calls them “my snake dads”. Him and his lusus have a better relationship now that his lusus is sedated, and he often cuddles with his lusus in between their two heads and feeds them the corpses after he’s done analyzing them. However, their relationship used to be negative and neglectful, as explained above.

Omg yes I love his dads.

Interests: Apart from the sciences listed on his theme, he also enjoys the arts and painting with blood of the corpses he studies, as well as making artistic murals outside to the annoyance of his neighbors. He likes cosmic horror books, doomsday devices and machinery, bodily modification, philosophers, and in his spare game he will play puzzle and roleplaying games (but not FLARPing, he’s bad at it). He thinks about hunting the undead sometimes, and likes horror movies, making friends regardless of their dead or alive status, scaring his neighbors, horror movies, and mindless antics.

Appearance: His hair is very straight, but it tends to get messy. Also the string on one of his horns is a string that got stuck on his horn and it’s hard to remove now.

usghiuserg good. I’m gonna see what I can do to his sprite to convey the “straight but messy” vibe more.

Personality: 

He’s VERY creative, more than analytical, which is an oddity for a scientist, others may think of him as a “creative genius” but he rejects the title of being a mad scientist. He wants to be positively known. He also always tries to finish things and has a general curious personality. He’s always seeking knowledge, and often tires himself out from working too much on his experiments, which causes him to enter a cycle of all nighters vs heavy sleeping. He’s a very heavy sleeper, often taking naps throughout the day. He procrastinates on mundane tasks that don’t relate to his interests or experiments. However, he drinks a lot of caffeinated beverages when he needs to work in order to keep himself awake essentially starting an all nighter cycle.

Depending on the circumstances, he can be very friendly and charming, or quite the opposite. It all depends. He likes to crack morbid jokes that make nobody laugh, and is quite disorganized as well as silly. He cares for his moirail (wip) and matesprit (wip) the most, and even though he sometimes snaps at them, he never wants to lose them.

Land: Land of Dreams and Angels, but depending on the classpect you assign him I will change it.

*Hopes and Dreams plays in the background*

What if he’s Land of Regrowth and Thaw, with the grass being fed by the remains of former consorts and the rest slowly unfreezing from ice as his journey continues? Works with his work with dead bodies and also gives us the vegetation associated with Life.

I also have his introduction written out but idk if I should include it. Here it is:

Your name is SANCTI SERPUS and you’d rather be sleeping, or dead.

You love everything relating to THE SCIENCES, but you are not very good at MATH, or keeping organized. However, you are still considered a “CREATIVE GENIUS”. You love anything that STIMULATES YOUR GRUBBY BRAIN -  such as PSYCHOLOGY, FORENSICS and TROLL BIOLOGY. You do many EXPERIMENTS, most of which involve using troll parts in jars, to create true ABOMINATIONS; and one which sadly took your right eye’s vision and has had you in fear of being CULLED. However, you reject the idea of being a “MAD SCIENTIST”.

In a weird fashion, you also highly enjoy THE ARTS, and paint the walls of your GINORMOUS HIVE and other places with objectively “pretty good” PICTURES made from the BLOOD of the corpses you work with, to the annoyance of your neighbors. You also have a slight interest in BODILY MODIFICATION, in an effort to withdraw attention from your accident, as well as an interest in COSMIC HORROR BOOKS, as any good scientist should have. Another interest of yours is VIDEO GAMES, especially ROLE PLAYING and PUZZLE games, and when you’re not working, you spend your time playing them. You’ve even attempted to CODE your own game, and FAILED.  However, you are not a very good FLARPER.

Despite this, all your work leaves you tired, which means you are a HEAVY SLEEPER and tend to procrastinate even the most MUNDANE TASKS that are not related to your interests. On the days that you are energized from drinking CAFFEINATED BEVERAGES, you like to go outside at night and collect all sorts of RANDOM KNICK-KNACKS, which may include CORPSES and FOSSILS to analyze. This has attracted the attention of your neighbors and BEST FRIENDS, who call you an UNHINGED TOTAL MANIAC. You don’t understand why, until you take off your lab coat to reveal an alarming amount of new scars from LABORATORY INCIDENTS. You really are kind of an ODDBALL. 

This is such a frickin MOOD. Let’s go to the redesign, though I don’t have much!

Horns - you said he got string tangled in his horns but those horns are shaped in a way that makes it pretty easy to untangle stuff! I gave him horns that are Klein-bottle inspired, though it’s obviously impossible for horns to actually grow into a Klein bottle shape. Now THAT’S a mess I wouldn’t wanna tangle with!

Hair - I absolutely ripped a fan-troll template to shreds and put it back together again for this hair, but I think this conveys “basically straight but mussed up” with a little more shape than the original.

Face - I adjusted the proportions and replaced the eyebrows with just the piercings because it was looking a little busy.

Shirt - Again it looked a little busy with the jacket with symbols on both flaps and the pendant in the middle, so I gave him a mad scientist jacket edited from John’s.

Symbol - I tried to find a happy medium between the radial symmetry of the original symbol and the Scorsci M with the arrows.

That’s pretty much it! Hope this helped!

-TR

[imhereformysciencefriends]

Day 7: New Life

@gamzeeweek

They set the mug down delicately upon the doily, and leaned back while crossing their legs.

“Again,” they ordered calmly.

“Again, honored one? What do you mean?”

“I mean start it all over. There were some salvageable moments, some decent parts, but honestly? Just scrap the whole thing. Do it all over, from the top.”

“From the—the beginning, honored one? All the way?”

“All the way.”

“But, honored one, that—”

“I know what I’m doing,” they said calmly, taking another sip of their tea. “Now. One more time, with feeling.”

—

You are a wriggler, and you are so, so, so full of love. This screechy ass troll as is ten times your size is your favorite person, ever, in the whole world, and you are going to Climb On Him. He is your best friend, the best ever, you love him so much—

And then it is time for you to go through the portal onto the meteor which crash lands down onto Alternia, and while you don’t know it because you are just a wriggler, the meteor is made of hyper-cushioning materials that prevented you from what would surely otherwise be a disastrous demise. You are at the fringes of the brooding caverns, far from the mouth where wrigglers as went through The Trials emerge to find loving custodians. You are found by a seagoat, who didn’t really want a wriggler, but had to go near-ish the caverns anyway, because of biology. You, of course, do not know this. You just know that this is your lusus, and you love him more than anything else in the entirety of everything ever.

“No, no, that’s no good. Move the meteor so it lands there.”

“Honored one, the adult jadebloods…”

“I know, but we need to take a calculated risk here. Have the meteor land there.”

You go through the portal onto the meteor which crash lands down onto Alternia, and while you don’t know it because you are just a wriggler, the meteor is made of hyper-cushioning materials that prevented you from what would surely otherwise be a disastrous demise. You are just outside the mouth of the brooding caverns, the impact of your landing shaking the caves below. But you do not care, because you are a wriggler. You squeal happily when a tidegoat mouths at the tuft of hair growing between your horns. You chirr happily up at him, and crawl onto his back. You are happy, because you know that this is your lusus, and you love him more than anything else in the entirety of everything ever.

What you do not know, because you are still very new you see, is that a tidegoat is similar to a seagoat in the same way that rabbits are similar to hares. While, outwardly, they look very much alike, with only a difference in size, a seagoat, like a hare, is actually far more terrifying and emotionally unavailable than its smaller counterpart. They are also genetically incompatible. Who knew? Not you. You’re just a little baby.

Tidegoatdad takes very good care of you, showing you how to wade in the tidepools and how to hold a sea urchin without hurting yourself or it, showing you the good places to look for shells and making sure you’re always inside by sunrise. He feeds you seaweed and fish and occasional squirrel, and makes you do your schoolfeeds while he sleeps curled up round your back like Alternia’s most comfortable couch. Sometimes he’ll let you bodypaint on that pretty white fur and flubber of his, even though it always washes off when you two go play in the brine and waves later.

You make a friend with this neat sea-sis, a bright eyed, sharp toothed sister as can’t go much farther than your shore. Her lusus don’t like it none when she strays too far, and you understand. Tidegoatdad can breathe down your neck a little too. But that’s okay, because he’s your lusus, and you know he only does it because he loves you so very motherfucking much. You and fishsis all up and get your friendship on, and she drags her moirail out to meet you too.

That brother is a motherfucking piece of work. Even with the two of you at him, he is still so reluctant to make strides towards being a nicer person. You can’t even imagine what he’d turn out without the both of you, there to keep him in check and in friendship. You do not know that you ain’t supposed to like them. That clowns and fish don’t get along. You are a clown and they are your friends, and you keep ‘em close to your pusher always.

You meet a sweet boy online as does steal your heart, and then break it also. You keep friendship, though, after. His friendship means more to you than his heart ever could, and the two of you spit fire and rhythm as is good and right. You meet a harsh boy as does rankle his hackles at every motherfucking thing, and although you ain’t subtle for shit, he don’t ever seem to notice how you drip diamonds whenever you speak to him.

You’re awful excited to meet them in person. A wicked smart brother and sister of yours are making this game that is supposed to let you meet them and you are all kinds of holy motherfucking gleeful.

—

“See, isn’t this better?”

“It is, honored one. It really, really is. But, I worry, honored one; the plot…”

“Will sort itself out. Keep watching.”

—

The game is more fun than you thought it’d be. It’s definitely upsetting when your lusus dies, that one you didn’t stop crying on until Karkat did come to the Land of Tents and Mirth and talk you down from it. But other than that, it’s fun. You’re on a different team from Feferi and Eridan, except it turns out not really, you were all teammates all along! You think that is a very nice prank for the universe to pull on you. You are on a team with Karkat and Tavros, right from the start, and that is very fun and excellent.

You guess it’s also kind of a bummer that the world ended. But, eh, nothing’s permanent.

Now you’re chilling on this wicked ass motherfucking meteor with all your good friends (and some friends as aren’t too good, just yet, but you look forward to being better friends (and that one chica as scares you something terrible)). A pink-skinned motherfucker as your sniffsis has been up and motherfucking obsessed with lately sends you a link to some motherfuckin’ music video, and as near as you can tell, he’s making mockery of your religion?

You ain’t got super close ties to the mirthful churchful. Especially now, since the world ended. Still, it makes you kinda pissed off that this brother would send you something with sole intention of upsetting you. It worked; you are upset. So you take a walk to clear your head, even though your best bro did tell everyone to stay where he could keep eyes on them. He’s busy trolling… someone, though, and it ain’t like you’re going to get into trouble.

You meander, opening chests here or there as you pass. One has this fugly ass puppet in it. Maybe if you were actually upset, instead of just a lil pissy, you would take this motherfucking comfort item and hold it, and look in its eyes because you want the plush, cottony comfort of something vaguely trolloid, but you aren’t, so you don’t. You just chuck it in your sylladex and forget about it on a colorful capcha card you ain’t ever going to open again. Staring at the pretty colors does calm you down some. You’re thinking clear, again, and meander with a lil kick in your step.

—

“See, honored one? He’s deviating from the plot.”

“Yes,” they said, delightedly pulling a rice cracker from the sleeve. “And thus, creating a new one.”

—

You lose the kick in your step when you encounter upon a collection of cliffs in the meteor. Where you are stands tall above some other pathway, where your sweet motherfuckin’ Tavbro and that bitch as scares you so badly are. She’s mocking him with his severed legs. The legs she did paralyze in the first place. They’re going to fight.

You—

“Give him a little nudge. Just a little one. Gamzee tends to lock up in high adrenaline situations, I don’t want him to be inactive for this.”

“Yes, honored one.”

—move. Your body going seeming without your brain’s consent, at first, but once the first step is made forward, the rest follow natural as blood flowing in your veins.

You drop down from the height, one club grasped in two fronds, and you

take

her

head

clear

off.

She would’ve killed him. She’d had his lance in her hand poised and aimed at his chest. Half a second, less, and she would’ve pierced the bloodpump as you hold as precious and dear as you do. She would’ve killed him.

It don’t make what you did any better.

The tears come immediate, panic following.

You killed her.

You killed her.

You took your club and laid it in the head of a sister whose name you knew! You killed her!

You grasp and tear at your hair, shrieking, wailing. You didn’t mean to, you—god, oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god!

The guilt wells up alongside the panic and you are blind to all else, seeing only blue, blue, blue, and your own bile. You killed her! How could you do that! Her blood is on your hands, on your club, in your hair, soaking into the knees of your pants where you kneel and keen high and distressed through your gurgling tears. You do not know where you are going when Tavros lifts you to your feet with his strong and gentle hands, you do not know where he leads you. Your pan is full of only guilty panic, and the color blue. You follow where he leads.

He leads you to Karkat, back in the common room, who you rush to in the need of a diamond returned. You are sobbing and aching and panicked and vulnerable, and you need him, you need him, you need him to be gentle with you, to gentle you down, you have never needed him more in your life.

It will strike you, later, that that is exactly the kind of romantic bullshit that Karkat motherfucking thrives on.

Eridan, Sollux, and Feferi stop whatever conversation it is that they are having to stare in painful awkwardness at you, which you do not make no notice of, and Kanaya ushers them all to the warp pad out the common room, which you also don’t notice but thank her later for doing. Karkat sits you down in the chair he’d been ignoring for favor of standing to rant on his keyboard, and sits backwards in a chair of his own, right in front of you. He’s got his palms on your cheeks and a crooning shoosh on his lips and he’s got you, he’s got you, you’re going to be okay. He shushes you down and gets the story out of you in sobbing parts. How you hadn’t wanted to. How you’d just acted, angry and protective and somehow all rolled up numb, and how you hadn’t been thinking at all until after the deed itself. He asks if it’s kind of like what you did with the Black King, and you guess, kind of. You hadn’t wanted to kill anybody. Hell, you don’t never want to hurt anybody, much less kill. Karkat knows. He knows, and tells you that this ain’t your fault. Vriska was the one trying to kill Tavros, you were just acting in kind. It’s okay.

Terezi interrupts you, one point. On the trail of something or other, she has that look about her when she’s playing investigator-detective and is on the hunt. Don’t say nothing, though, just takes a picture of you and Karkat, hands on teary cheeks, and leaves with a bright cackle.

You stay with Karkat some while after, and when you ask for a hug he gives you one.

Then your phones buzz and Feferi wants you all to come up to the roof. Some sort of excitement is happening with the horrorterrors out in that far off ring, and there’s something to do with the humans?

Nepeta congratulates you immediately on your new diamond when you get there, looking all atwitter. You think it is real motherfuckin’ miraculous of your sister to know all these things about you without your even telling her, like woah. It just happened. Karkat tells you that the two of you are still holding hands, and then Nepeta tells you that Terezi sent her a photo. You are happy to realize that you are, in motherfucking fact, still holding hands with your best beloved, even as he starts screeching at your sisters who do make to laugh at him, while Equius stares on all uncomfortable and sweaty. He offers his congratulations too, stiff and awkward as that brother is always getting to be, and you smile at him a gratitude for his thoughts.

Tavros is near the lip of the roof, staring out into the vastness and the darkness. You want to go to him, but want to let go of Karkat’s hand less, so you stay put.

When the green sun shows up, and three siblings with it, you are well and truly motherfucking dazzled.

Tavros is there to greet Aradia when she returns to life, and you can taste their joy at their reunion. Dave and Rose, them human fuckers, are here too now, which, sick. You have no idea how that happened, but shit if you ain’t excited about it. More friends.

You lose track of happenings real motherfuckin’ quick after that. A green portal opens and a bucket flies through and hits Karkat straight in the horn, and then a whole bunch of people do a whole bunch of things to make the portal bigger and also faster(??), and then there’s a giant ass golden ship flying alongside the meteor as is moving very quickly, and two more human motherfuckers as can come be friends, plus their human Lands of whatevers and whatevers, so you will be able to play around in them and get grist and fraymotifs and shit so long as Jadesis is up and willing to shrinkify you, and you are very unaware of so many things as happened to make this your reality but you are well and truly happy for it.

Seems to you that everything is going to work out just fine.

—

“This… is really good…”

“Yes,” they said proudly, “yes it is.”

“But, honored one, I’m still confused. With Gamzee, you know, happy, how will the circle complete?”

“That circle was stupid anyway,” they said with a wave of their hand. “We’ll simply close another circle instead.”

“Yes, honored one, but how?”

They shrugged. “We shall have to see, won’t we?”

—

The three human years on the meteor go by in a rush of memories that are both happy and not. Life be like that. You are good friends with all gathered there, by the end of it. Dating five boys in a set of full quadrants and chilling with Feferi as you always used to do, on the beach. Aradia, who Sollux and Tavros and Terezi did convince to stay, likes to braid your hair and take you on adventures through the Lands, John is a hilarious motherfucker and Jade is a sweetheart. You improve on fighting by battling imps, learn new fun things to cook, play board games and FLARP without the fatal part and make piles of horns and pillows and empty soda bottles wherever you do please to.

You also, though, get a visit from a different you. An older you. A you with scars you don’t recognize, and Aradia’s music boxes in his hands.

He tells you that there is a task you must do. And you can do it now, or you can do it later, but you gotta do it. You’ll come back right to this time, when you’re done, Aradia’s music boxes won’t fail you, and then you’ll give them back to him and he’ll go back when he’s from.

So you take them, and do as he tells you he did.

You go to an egg all spiral-colored, watch it hatch and cradle the snake as slithers out.

Cherubs grow fast, you learn. Way, way faster than trolls and humans. It ain’t gradual. It’s sorta… all at once, and then nothing for a while, and then spurt! All at once again. You only get to cradle a baby for a few perigees, most. The child is a little longer, but you’re not there for even a full two sweeps before they surge up into adolescence, which will apparently last many sweeps after this.

You set up the two computers while Callie is awake, and ensure she is and always will be in contact with her friends, the neon colored motherfuckers as you haven’t met yet. You also get her contact with your future self, so she won’t be so lonely and fatherless as you would hate to leave her. But you’re not even an adult yourself, and you wonder at why the universe makes you do this while you are so young.

Caliborn claws you up when you tell him it’s time for you to leave, and you do not give him your future self’s contact. If your future self wants to talk to him, he can come here and update Caliborn’s computer his own motherfucking self.

You do love him, though. Bratty as he may be.

Just… you’ll love him more in memory.

You leave, just out of their reach, the keys that your older self gave to you when he handed you the music boxes. You dunno what they’re for, but whichever one of them leaves this place will have something to do with them, you think?

You hug Callie one last time, and head out.

Back on the meteor, you are so, so, so happy to see your friends again. To them, you weren’t even gone a whole hour, but you have not seen them in some sweeps and you have missed them terribly. But this is your role, you guess, like seeing dead bodies is Dave’s, or wrecking reality is Rose’s, or being really cool is Terezi’s.

You don’t let Karkat go for a motherfucking week, purrbox up and running the whole while.

When you do arrive in the new session, everything goes sideways so fast you’d be real motherfuckin impressed if you weren’t one of the things going sideways. Still, between the… how many of you are there? 18? 19? Somewhere ‘round 20 of you, you get it figured out. You don’t wanna really fight any bosses, so you get to chill with the Mayor, who you are all in pretty collective agreement is the best, and Callie! Who’s here! And wearing a ring she got from Roxy, who is a very nice girl who you approve of very much! You hug Callie very tightly and she tells you how much she’s missed you. You’ve missed her too, for all it hasn’t even been a perigee on your end, and the three of you sit and chat (mostly, Callie tells you about her life since you’ve left, and you listen). You’re there when the Mayor’s girlfriend arrives, and she is a very scary lady who you respect a lot.

A lot of things happen all at once, shortly thereafter. All the bosses are defeated, and a lot of people are fraymotifing, and then Feferi and Terezi bring Vriska back to life, and Terezi punches her straight in the face and shouts some seriously pitch black inches at her, and Vriska… changed, when she died. She apologizes and everything, swears to be better, for Terezi, for everyone, and you do not know what is going on there, but hey, if killing her was what it took for her to be a good person, then, you guess you’re almost glad you did…?

That one guilt had been the single worst part of all these last three years, for you. Something as haunted you eternal, no matter how much you jammed with Karkat about it, no matter how all your friends forgave you of it. But to see that in the end, it was for the best, well. You are finally able to let that go.

There are many people on the lily pad. You are one. And you, collectively, have won.

You go through the door, and you obtain your happy ending.

—

“....”

“Dear, are you crying?” they asked gently.

“Yes, honored one. I, I’m just, so happy. He deserves this. They all do.”

“They do,” they agreed, smiling warmly. “Now, how about a soft epilogue?”

—

You’ve been god of this new universe for two sweeps, or four years. Aradia does a lot of time shenanigans, while Dave don’t touch time shit no more. Kanaya likes to meddle and fuss with the past, with the Mayor’s help, and a democratic, socialist society rises up with their efforts and everyone all lives together in joy and happiness. Sometimes people try to sorta… fence themselves off by species, but that is a very dumb and silly thing to try and do, and it never actually keeps at that way for longer than a year or sweep.

You are happily retired from all fighting and magic Rage bullshit, and spend your days happily with your quads and daughter, who is now the same age as you, pretty much. Callie hands you the keys you left her brother and her, at one point, and you borrow Aradia’s boxes and head back to your younger self, since you gotta complete that circle, and a bunch of other circles that you had no idea you actually played a part in. Apparently you’re a pretty involved dude, for all you feel you don’t do a terrible lot. Lots of moving pieces out of your awareness. But that’s fine, that you’re just a domino in a line, you’re happy to be, because what you do sparks a deep joy in you, and you can’t imagine your life going any different from how it’s going now. When you return to your time and retirement, you’re happy to see past!Callie as a contact, and strike up correspondence with your daughter who isn’t the same age as you.

Rose starts up talk with John on going back in time and fighting Lord English when he is young—

“Mm, yes, this is exactly the sort of nonsense that simply will not fly. John doesn’t have retcon powers since there was nothing to retcon, which means the house juju has been successfully removed from the narrative. We cannot be having this.”

‘Yes, honored one. Oh, how about this?”

—and a little protective curl of Rage flickers up in the part of your soul that is magic. You tell them that Lord English might be a bitch and a bastard, but the little one is still only just Caliborn. And Caliborn, for all the scars he gave you and the headaches as didn’t fade for hours after he went to sleep, is still your child, even as you know he is your child that grows up cruel and perverse and pure, straight up, motherfucking evil. They leave him be.

“Oh perfect, well done!”

After that, there is… nothing. No more Game nonsense, no imps or demons or gods. Just you, and the family as isn’t yours by any blood or relation, but is your motherfucking family, by choice and emotion and deep, unwavering love.

You are an adult, and you are so, so, so full of love.

[homestuckexamination]

I can't remember if hussie ever addressed this, I know troll genetics work differently than humans but I always had this idea that the beforus trolls were made from mixing two alternian trolls, like how the kids were made. I figured since there's only two seadwellers, feferi and Eridan's DNA created meenah and cronus. I'm trying to come up with all the pairs. I know some have switched classes, maybe those are the pairs? Is this ever discussed?

There’s no pairs. Derse Dreamers and Prospit Dreamers had their genetic material combined together or at least half of them at a time, and twice- Presumably because of the Red/Black Pailing divide. We can see this in Karkat’s laboratory, the Ectobiology Machine has 24 capsules for material, separated in four blocks of 6 capsules each. If the same divide as the Kids’ applies, one side is for all the Derse Dreamers, and the other for the Prospit Dreamers. We also know Karkat’s group was first, meaning he took the paradox slime of each of them in the group, and, again, apparently twice over because of some weird red/black genetic stuff. (Or maybe the machine did that part automatically?)

Either way, yeah, each Beforus Troll is a genetic mixture of 6 of the other Trolls, or at the very least, 3, not just pairs.

[transformationstuck]

Karkat CTF's gamzee to prevent him from rampaging and killing everyone, also to look after him.

It was for gamzee’s own good at this point, too much murder on his part and too much mercy from Karkat’s had brought it to this conclusion, gamzee had been tried and convicted by the group following all this craziness and dark carnival bullshit and was sentenced to death, Karkat as is moirail however had persuaded them to let him carry out the deed, except he couldn’t nor was he planning on doing so, he would take care of his moirail he was his “bEsT fRiEnD” as he was called.

Gamzee meanwhile had devolved into just an angry mess chained at the neck to prevent him escaping or lashing out, when in came Karkat, one of the few that had tried to be nice or show him mercy all things considered, the highblood unsurprised that the others had chosen him to carry out as he was one of the closest to him and wouldn’t freak out, only this time, when he told him to turn around though, he thought he knew what was coming, but nothing could have prepared him for what was about to happen.

Karkat sighed as the Makara turned around, the others had kept him chained and his clothes were in tatters, but he wouldn’t need them, not for much longer, Karkat told him of this which made the juggalo strip off with shaky hands, Karkat quietly following suit behind him as the highblood both prepared for the end and was terrified by it, until her felt the warmth of Karkat hugging him from behind around his torso which confused him greatly.

CG : I SAID I WOULD TAKE CARE OF YOU, AND I WILL… JUST NOT IN THE WAY THEY WANT… NOW RELAX YOU MURDEROUS ASSHOLE..

Gamzee was… well, confused, more so than usual especially as Karkat was nakedly hugging him from behind and what felt like squeezing around his waist, what was he thinking or trying to do, pail with him or something?

TG : WhAt ArE y-… Y…. uUuUuRrGh…

Gamzee groaned as he felt something in his throat, he felt wrong, off, his legs felt blurry if that was a viable description, the feeling grew worse until he couldn’t feel his legs at all, Karkat still hugging onto him even as he wriggled and tried to turn and see what was happening or happened to his legs.

CG : STOP SQUIRMING, OKAY, JUST RELAX.TG : ThEn T-t-TeLl mE wHaT yOu ArE mOtHeRfUcKiNg DoInG tO mE…

Gamzee replied as he saw his hands starting to turn purple, all of him was turning purple, spreading in small patches around points at random over his upper body, He felt soft, yet stronger than ever, like his whole body was turning into muscle or firm flesh or… he couldn’t understand it even as he began to cough, Karkat just holding him onto him like a warm re-assurance repeating that he was going to take care of him.

Gamzee’s body now began to drip and pulse, he could feel heat beginning to push through his body as he struggled to relax, it felt intense, strange, weird. Karkat meanwhile was panting heavily due to something that Gamzee just couldn’t explain even with the heir of the signless speaking it clearly for him to hear.

CG: I… I FELL A-ALL OF YOU… FUCK… SO… MUCH..

Gamzee replied though his arms and most of his body had softened to the point of pliability, his hair having flattened and smoothed into his purple mass like body, horns nothing more than fleshy nubs on his smoothing head and face.

TG : w-URP- w-HaT…?

Gamzee burping out something sticky from his mouth other than drool, had he been sick, no it was like a pulse which traveled through him and out of his mouth, one continuous glurp of fluid spewing out his mouth though his clenched soft teeth as his body surrendered to Karkat as the smoothness spread over his face, leaving the Highblood as nothing more than a mass of sticky purple flesh which was slowly shrinking and wriggling.

CG : SHH… SHH… IT’S OKAY GAMZEE YOU… YOU RELAX AND LET ME TAKE CARE OF YOU..

His voice seemingly reacting with the highblood convert who was little more than an oversized bulge, thick, girthy and strong, Karkat whimpered and moaned as he couldn’t hug onto the former Gamzee’s body as he wriggled and squirmed in his arms, the Makara too slick and stimulated by his new body to relax, Karkat moaning and whimpering as squirt after messy squirt of genetic material traveled through his gargantuan girth, each time turning the mass that was gamzee more and more candy red.

By the time Gamzee had eventually calmed down Karkat was a sweaty mess covered in purple and crimson genetic material, his bulge red like his blood save for veins of the deepest purple hues which refused to fade, a constant reminder and persistence of gamzee who he would look after for the rest of his life.

CG : OKAY… LET’S… LET’S PUT YOU AWAY, ALRIGHT… BEST FRIEND?

Karkat wincing and panting as he felt his bulge begin to pull itself into his body and shrink down, it was tight inside him, keeping all that mass in his body, almost painful but he would get used to it eventually, he had to, he was going to make sure Gamzee was taken care of, even if he had to do it all by himself…

-Epilogue - 

Eventually the others did find out, however they didn’t mind in the slightest, in fact, some of them were rather pleased to see gamzee, or more specifically Karkat’s colossal bulge which Karkat always took care of and treated well for the rest of his days.-x

[davekatprompts]

Heat Wave

“Fuck you Strider! Stop leaving these alchemized yellow liquid abominations all over the nutrition block!”

Karkat was fuming as Dave stood casually in the kitchen wearing only boxer shorts and a tank top, eating an apple.

“Karkat chill, it’s just apple juice man. Or as close to apple juice as Rose could get it. Honestly these apple taste more like a pear had sex with a piece of tofu, but beggars can’t be choosers ya know.”

“Shut the fuck up Dave. Some of us would like to live our lives peacefully, without having to hear you blither on into all of existence about fucking apples!”

“Look, I love an old fashioned Karkat tantrum as much as the next guy, but it’s only half past five and you look dangerously close to flying off the handle. As a badge wearing member of the TSA I’m authorized to stop any and all unsafe Karkats from taking flight. Are you troll PMSing or something?”

“Fuck off!”

No, he was not troll PMSing or something.

To put it simply, Karkat was horny.

To put it more complexly, Karkat was in his heat cycle. Even though his mind knew perfectly well that Alternia didn't exist anymore and that no Imperial Drones were going to show up on this idiotic meteor to demand his contribution to the Empire's genetic slurry, his body was screaming, HAVE FUCKING SEX YOU THINK PAN-ADDLED BULGE CHAFING TOUCHSTUB DRAGGING MORON!

What was ironic was that even if Karkat did find a willing concupiscent partner, and even if the Imperial Drones somehow did come knocking, Karkat would be culled instantly at the sight of his cherry red genetic material. His body was desperately asking for something that would, qute plainly, have resulted in his death. As it were, on the meteor Karkat was quite safe, save for maybe dying of embarrassment at his current situation.

Fuck maturity. Karkat couldn’t concentrate on anything but the throbbing emptiness he felt in his nook, and the needy pulsing of his bulge. It was maddening. It had already been two weeks and he had no idea how long this bullshit would last. He was taking breaks to his room every hour, and as soon as it was a reasonable enough time, he would lock himself in his room for the evening and touch himself through the night.

It wasn’t enough. His skin was constantly flushed and hot to the touch, his nook leaking red genetic material onto every pair of boxers he owned. It was fucking embarrassing, and Karkat was getting more and more frustrated every day. The worst part was, he had no idea how long this would last. Heat cycles weren’t exactly something they taught you about in the schoolfeed, and unfortunately his lusus was suffering from an extremely chronic case of being fucking dead.

It was *especially* torturous to be around a certain douchetacular asshole, seeing as Karkat may have been nursing a slight red crush on the human Dave Strider. And yet here they were. Standing in the kitchen, arguing when all Karkat could think about was finding the nearest dark corner on the meteor to stick a hand down his pants and relieve some of the pressure on his bulge.

Dave took another bite of his apple. Karkat watched his lips hungrily, while simultaneously hating himself.

“Seriously Dave. Fuck. Off.”

As Dave turned to toss the apple away, Karkat’s eyes helplessly raked over his form; his pink lips, the sharp angle of his chin, the way his collarbones stood out from his skin, his flat stomach, and the way the tank top was a tight fit, riding up just enough to see a two small indents in a V shape that seemed to be pointing down at-- fuck.

“Earth to Karkat. Well I guess it’s really no-more-earth to Karkat. You look so out of it dude. Why don’t you tell papa Strider what’s hurtin’ ya so he can kiss it all better.”

At the mention of kiss, Karkat’s nook clenched, reminding him it was painfully empty. He needed to go. Now. His entire body was practically shaking with need. He snapped his legs shut and whispered through clenched teeth. “Dave, I am walking away now and I swear to god, if you follow me I will rip out every one of those pathetic nubs you call teeth and string them over your doorway.”

Karkat turned away and walked as quickly as he could without running, to his bedroom. As soon as he passed the threshold he was on his knees. With absolutely no preamble he shoved his pants and underwear down and thrust three fingers into his nook, rocking back on them, almost crying with relief. His bulge whipped its way into the open air, thrashing violently.

His mind conjured up images of Dave’s lips and tongue working down his bulge, Dave’s long slender legs wrapped around his waist as he pushed into a welcoming, tight warmth. And the reverse, with Karkat pressing his knees up towards his chest to feel Dave thrust deeply into him, over and over, hard and without mercy.

He brought a shaky hand down to his bulge and stroked; once, twice, and then with stars in his eyes he exploded, barely pulling the bucket into place in time.

He threw himself backwards onto the floor, reveling in the bliss that came with his orgasm. He knew that in thirty minutes the cycle would start again, building until he couldn’t stand it anymore, and he would find himself in this moment yet again, thinking about Dave while fingering himself into oblivion.

That’s when he turned towards his doorway to see wide red eyes meeting his, a mouth that was breathing just as hard as he was through softly parted lips and cheeks flushed red.

“You really should have closed your door, dude,” Dave said.

A03 Link

[creativegeneric]

Karkat - Alright, everybody, I know that tonight is definitely not the night we normally do this. I wasn't able to do the one for the last week, and I'm sure I speak for everybody when I say we'll all be too busy to pick up on the one tomorrow. But our discussion tonight is going to be an important one, and one we definitely can't skip out on. After a short debriefing of the last week for everybody, we'll have a big one to talk out, and it's an important one. I'll gladly answer questions, but I want everybody to hold on to em until the end, for just in case they get answered during our talk.

Karkat - For the weekly debrief, we have good news, at least! The temporary hivestem has been finished, and furnished, and just in time, too, as it's being put to use. Fifteen new incoming trolls who have suggested they're up for scoping out staying here with us. The orphanage is finished, and similarly being put to use for some grubs who need assistance, and the mediculler's office is nearing done, and also being put to good use. Finishing that is one of our higher priorities, but it's been knocked down the list a little bit by my next topic. Before we get on to that, I'd like to thank everybody for doing an amazing job at the construction work, and for being so patient and dilligent. Y'all are doing amazing, and I'm very proud of you all. Thank you.

Karkat - On to the big, new, difficult, important thing...you're all aware of the Beeper I found last week that prevented me from working on the last properly scheduled get-together we normally have. I stumbled across them in the forest, same area I found Ceteus perigees ago. Marked both down on my map, because I wouldn't remember where otherwise. Dad, Felide, and myself all went to the area to have a good look around. And we found exactly what we feared we would find. Can you guess?

Karkat - I'm sure everybody has noticed a specific trait that our newest residents share. They're all Jade-bloods, and all definitely refugees from the caverns. We found them. And after we got the Jade Mothers calmed down from the sudden intrusion, we asked them how things are going, sat them down with food and talked about things. And things aren't good. The latest batch of grubs will be the last, unless we do something now. Other caverns, the situation could definitely be different. The last brood could have been perigees ago, or may be a few perigees away from now, but the Jade situation will be the same across the board. No supplies or genetic material being delivered, no care for the lusii being administered, and no news from the outside world. Scouts sent out never coming back, whether because they ran into those wonderful gangs we all love soooooo much, or because they caught a wind of freedom and took the fuck off, nobody but them specifically knows. They're a mess, and it's due to a single thing I'm sure everybody also recognizes as missing from our night-to-night lives.

Karkat - The cause of it is the drones deactivating. The drones delivered supplies and material to the Jades, wrangled and bred and coordinated lusii, and a running idea of how well things were going outside of the caverns. At this point, we have a big choice to make, and it's not gonna be a fun one. If we wait too long, restarting the caverns will cause a lot of casualties, result in a lot of grubs requiring assistance, and could even kill the Mother Grubs involved. Quick decision-making is required, and from what I can tell thus far, we have three options out the gate. First is the literal worst of the lot, which is nothing. It's the safest and easiest, but it'll ensure the extinction of our species as a whole on the planet. I'm not even considering that one, so don't bother suggesting it.

Karkat - The second and third options. These are hard ones, but in the end, if we pull it off, our species will continue after this final generation, and we can work through the problems facing the lot of us at a good pace without worrying about the imminent demise of our kind on a whole. They consist of restarting the drones and slowly implementing code changes to them, making them more lenient and less murder happy, and instead of single-pairing-mandatory donations, also accepting solo or multiple partner donations, as well as making the delivery to the caverns less stressful, and lusus care more thorough and appropriate...and making new drones from scratch.

Karkat - I will admit that while, yes, I very much do want new drones from scratch, building enough of them to do what we need them to do is going to take a long time. Time we may not have. While new drones would be ideal, we need to do something right now, to prevent us from being one of the final generations of our species to exist.

Karkat - I don't like it any more than the next guy. But we have to do something. And we have to do it now, or else we may never be able to.

Karkat - I did ask everybody to hang on until I was finished to ask questions, and now I'd be happy to answer or discuss things you're concerned about or confused over, before we vote over what to do as a group.

[sour-gummi-kiwi]

hey here are some Shitty post-game troll kingdom ideas

I had a cool convo with @sparkliee so im gonna unlock the secrets of the universe via copy paste

There are only 4 (four) colours of blood, Cerulean, teal, jade, (all jade bloods are rainbow drinkers now, but whether or not they Activate is their own choice) and Candy Red. The population is about equal between them all, 35% red, 21% for the others. The difference is because hybrids exist, and as ppl got older and Libidos came into creation, prospitians, dersites, and humans all have red blood, changing the balance a bit. If a Teal blood and a prospitian were to make a baby, it would have red blood to support the prospitian features. It would be far more unbalanced if the species had been resurrected more than 20 years ago, but the balance will tip largely eventually. There are only four blood colors b/c the trolls that had them lived, and everyone else died to hard to get the genetic material back. (it  has to be jizz, unfortunately) and no one  wants to EVEN THINK abt gamzee here, lets b real.

The hemospectrum hierarchy can't even exist with so few blood colours, especially since the population amounts per colour are so even. Should things shift enough, or purple bloods return so there's more colours, the hemospectrum won't come back because it's Shitty, and the Kungeys would kick ur ass into the nth dimension if u tried to bring it back.

Before terezi hoofed it to find vriska, she oversaw the justice system in the trollian kingdom, and helped improve others elsewhere!!!! She was on earth for 5 years and set up all the laws, and how to deal with people that break them.

No Murder. Its illegal, just like it is in the rest of the world. No matter what, you cannot assist in a suicide bc thats murder!!!! if someone does you dirty, and not in a kissmesis way, u tell the Cops in your CH or area!!! (they can be found where the info gatherers are)

No Stealing. things still belong to people u stupid head, just barter with them for it!!!! Refusing to give service for something also counts as theft!!! if its not up for sale, or its in their h o m e, fUCK OFF!!!!!!! the punishment for this ranges, depending on previous arrests and the importance of said item. IF YOU STEAL A  P E R S O N YOU CAN BE HELD TO THE SAME STANDARD AS A MURDER!!!!!!!!!!!

Attempting to Bring Harm to another person is illegal, Unless That Person Is Your Kissmesis. You cant just assault someone if you’re in a bad mood!!!! Get ur kissmesis and a bucket, Dave’s sake. 

Attempting to Spread Ideals that Contradict That of The New State is Illegal. this might sound like "don't criticize the government or u go to jail" but its just dont bring back shit like the hemospectrum, anything like that. No nazis in our country.

Those are the big 4, basically anything else falls into one of those. (rape is #3 but even if its ur kissmesis its illegal.)

The jury Was, at first, the best lawyers terezi could find, but as time went on, actual Trolls took those places. Its 7 people, a prosecutor and defence lawyer, and the judge.  Since there's so little crime (b/c ppl are happy and don't feel the need to do Bad Stuff) Terezi herself is the Judge (while she was gone it was Rose), and shit gets INTENSE!!!! Its innocent until proven guilty on paper, but terezi is far more "guilty until proven innocent"-minded, so these trials can get S P I C Y. there was a small spike in crime for the first, like year or so, while terezi was gone looking for vriska. Once she was back, things changed back to normal. There has only been about 375 cases in the whole 20 years, most disputes over if something was "paid off" properly. Those are solved pretty easy. There has only been a couple dozen reports of #3, two of #1, and none of #4. There has only been about 375 cases in the whole 20 years, most disputes over if something was "paid off" properly. Those are solved pretty easy. There has only been a couple dozen reports of #3, two of #1, and none of #4.

Its been abt 20 years since the kiddos arrived on earth, and the trolls took their new kingdom to like, northern africa and the whole kingdom is no bigger than iran

It's just barter instead of money, and since money doesn't "exist," ppl just sort of, do stuff like build roads and stuff at the request of the Kringles, and they give them stuff in return. When dealing with other cultures that use currency, trolls kind of do that "if u give me a free coffee i'll clean your kitchen for u" thing. Other countries are p respectful abt the whole thing. 

Jobs are abundant, as trolls can do Lots of stuff humans can't (psiconics, animal communication, mind control) but they also do regular stuff in their society, like cook, clean, and do service jobs.

There are Communal Hives along with the regular 1 troll hive. Communal hives are like, first nations log houses (idk if u know what that is but its VERY accurate to what im going for here) but REALLY big buildings. There can be anywhere from 60 to 250 trolls living in a single communal hive. Once a troll turns, like 10, they can make the choice of going to a CH (communal hive) or staying on their own. This decision can be changed at any time, but all the stuff u have to do to get in a CH (like proof of identity, ur passport, the stuff u got) is more complicated the older you get. People still got lussi, but there are far more rules on what types of creatures can even be lussi (Vriska's for example, just wouldn't happen), and one would also get to take your lusus with you when you enter it. It’s the school and living space of most trolls.

Politics don't really exist for trolls?? Whoever is incharge of your CH tells "info collectors" what the deal with stuff is, then its overseen and sent off to the royals (kanaya+karkat) so they can do stuff. Ppl that live on their own have info collectors assigned to an area, and if u live there u tell them the deal. 

Cities in Troll Town (i dont got a name yet r ip) are basically just out door malls? like they got hotels ("u sleep here but u gotta fix it after, capiche?? and do ur own dishes, for Dave's sake") and stuff, but they're mostly hUGE barter places, where u trade stuff for other stuff. Things like libraries are in CH's but u can find more expansive ones in cities, there are universities, places u go when u want to learn more, and they're just university but Good, and most cities have a couple CH's in the area (like half a mile away or so) so ppl can actually. Go there. 

Trollian cities like Captor, Medigo, Ampora (yes i named them after the dead kiddos b/c they need to be remembered somehow) are H U G E attractions to other races. 

Ampora is a coastal town, big in fishing, and you can take tours of the waters there in submarines and stuff, theres lots of resorts.

Captor is mostly technology based, with Universities creating Cool New stuff all the time. Imagine troll tokyo.

Medigo is right in the desert, and has the biggest population of non-trolls in the trollian kingdom, humans mostly, b/c theres lots of stuff about history there, and the most expansive shows telling the tales of the gods (basically a play of all of homestuck) are there.

Knowledge of the gods and their stories are treated as history lessons all over the globe, and knowing what to do should you be chosen to play the game is knowledge as universal as knowing what friendship is. U gotta know this stuff, just in case. 

[drinkshaming-blog]

>Gamzee: Transport eggs.

You illuminate the path ahead of you, unwavering in your light as you gingerly carry a large, padded basket full of eggs towards one of the incubation caverns. Your bare feet pad softly against the rocky ground, dark stone tinted a hundred colors from sweeps of blood and paint running through the crevices. As you walk, you sing to the basket under your breath.

Ahead, the entry you remember is gone, as well as several of the murals that were beside it. You stop and frown. Your memory isn’t that bad, is it?

“Gamzee!” calls a voice from down the tunnel. “Ataki’e!”

You look up and wave in greeting. “Ataki’la, kenna.”

A troll a few sweeps older than you, Datayn, approaches you, carrying an armful of failed eggs. She nods to the wall where the entry should be. “Eylna te hariek’a juni pate, ah, saulo tog’una fabrei ne’gi, tellai.” Her expression darkens momentarily. “Temai’e herum herei te taki’e kureti aue.”

Your eyebrows lift and you study the wall, or rather the unwieldy rubble that makes up the wall. It’s difficult to tell where there’s been a recent collapse because there are so many old collapses-- there’s an old saying that goes hariek’a hennei kala re’ue ni’a, or ‘every wall of the caverns is made of someone’s ruins’. Datayn says eight jades and forty eggs were lost to a collapse three nights ago. You turn your gaze back to Datayn with a soft smile. “Auwae. Malai, malai, kenna.”

She smiles back. “Malai, malai, tellai.”

“Reke’te aue hyeni’el keji keia unelli te orema?”

“Paela taei ke me’ei.”

“Fa’ele key te jyre’kl te haeme’ai saulo taki’e?”

“Ah, raenu keai ke’ea ne’a dayn, melliaku.”

“Ta, auwae. Kelli’a ieneta ue!” You carefully rotate one of the eggs in your basket.

“Ieneta ue,” she echoes, nodding towards the failed eggs in her arms. “Temai’ilee kaki morei, shereya, Gamzee.” She laughs at her own joke and allows you to adjust the rhododendron in her hair before she continues on her path and you alter yours, turning right at the next fork to make your way to another incubation cavern.

As you walk, you check your messages, scrolling through a couple notifications about various projects you’re collaborating on (and sighing softly at your conversations with Tavros and Karkat respectively) until you reach your conversation with your supervisor.

GAMZEE: no worries, motherfucker GAMZEE: youll get a chance to see these legs again sooner or later haha JAREED: |et’s aim for ‘sooner’. GAMZEE: sure thing :o) JAREED: you are hard at work, i assume? GAMZEE: be up and carrying some motherfucking eggs around right now actually JAREED: oh! are you, uh. |uminescent? GAMZEE: yeah haha i lights all up whenever shits dark GAMZEE: helps a brother get around easy JAREED: that’s pretty hot.

Your smile widens. Motherfuck, for all the respect he doesn’t have for you, this thing you’re doing with him feels pretty good.

GAMZEE: you think? JAREED: yeah, the who|e g|owing thing, as we|| as the makeup stuff you wear. JAREED: and you. you are beautifu|. GAMZEE: haha damn thanks GAMZEE: thats all some nice shit to hear from a motherfucker as you GAMZEE: which, here cant make no judgements cause i dont all talk to so many highbloods JAREED: you are the first jade i’ve spoken to as we||. GAMZEE: really? JAREED: yes. i have heard stories about friends of friends who have had… encounters with jades, of course, but it is difficu|t to discern how much of that is pure boasting. JAREED: i think most tro||s want to find out what it’s |ike. GAMZEE: wow GAMZEE: that mean a brother just got lucky or something? JAREED: yeah, i got to see you for myse|f. GAMZEE: all kinds of motherfucking good shit that be haha GAMZEE: this fucker getting to talk at ya such how, shades and looks and everything JAREED: nothing you say makes sense. it’s cute. GAMZEE: haha aight JAREED: it’s because you speak that backwards jade dia|ect, right? it’s very exotic.

Does he think you’re speaking in the mother tongue? Does he think that’s the mother tongue?

GAMZEE: sure GAMZEE: so this all you tryna make a story for ya friends friends to gossip at, if ya catch? JAREED: abso|utely. i want you.

Oh, man. This is obviously intensely objectifying, but fuck it’s nice to be wanted. Why don’t you fall in love with people who fetishize you like Jareed does, again? (Because you would and do choose real, all-consuming, unrequited love over someone fickle who actually wants you any night. Which is a miracle unto itself.)

GAMZEE: thanks :o) JAREED: i’|| try to find an excuse to visit the caverns soon. GAMZEE: oh aight JAREED: is the new diet for the mother grub working out? GAMZEE: yeah shit be going down right as rain yo

You hear singing and see flickering light ahead, and shut off your palmhusk, checking on the eggs instead of paying attention to the new message vibration. Before long, you find yourself cutting through an enormous cavern where rows of jades are hauling on lines and handling levers to move huge vats of genetic material (a job far too delicate for machines- one off-temper unit and the entire gene pool could be poisoned). You walk down one of the lines as they continue to sing, and stop beside one particular troll.

“Yo, Kerede,” you greet him.

The jagged scar on his face twists as he smiles up at you, continuing to haul in time with the song. “Hey, brother. How’s the night treating you?”

“Some fine shit, tellai. You?”

He shrugs as much as he can. “Got stuck hauling, but we having a good time here.” Something catches someone’s attention; they raise their hand and call for the others to stop. The motion pauses and several trolls hurry over to check out whatever’s wrong with the slurry. Kerede steps away from the line; you decaptchalogue a skein of water and hand it to him. “Thanks, man. You going to the festival this week, right?”

“Yeah, motherfucker just heard of all that,” you reply. “Gotta pay respects and shit. Been a while since the last big event, anyway.”

“True, shit’ll be nice.” Kerede carefully pours some water over the back of his neck. “Anyways, I’m near finished with the inseam on that hat for ya’ friend. Probably be done in a night or two, depending how busy I am. Having a nice time with it.” He finishes dousing himself in water and holds out his arms invitingly; you carefully hand your basket to him and stretch. 

“Damn, aight. Thanks. Anything a motherfucker can do back at ya?” you ask.

He thinks about that for a moment. “Oh, I been working on some fancy dress for my palemate’s wriggling day in a few perigees here, could use some patterned silk for a shawl kinda thing.”

You nod. It isn’t repayment for his services, that isn’t how things work down here; it’s a way to keep busy, to keep creating, to help a brother. And this sounds like something you’d enjoy in your free time. “What size you thinking? Might need to find some help getting dyes and all.”

“Well-” A call goes up for workers to return to their places. “Shit.” He hands your basket and water skein back to you and repositions himself beside the line. “I’ll message you the details, okay?”

“Sounds good, brother.” You smile at him. “See you.”

He returns your smile and you’re on your way again as the singing starts back up.

Some time later, you see seashells dotting the walls of the tunnel, most broken into a few pieces by centuries of pressure at least. A few jades are carefully digging some of the shells out of the stone. They must be on break. You watch them gently scrape at the insides of the shells, presumably to make sure they’re the type that can be used to make a certain rich fuchsia pigment. One of the trolls calls to you and asks if you’d like some dye from these once it’s been treated. You say yes, definitely, and thank him-- without stopping; you’ve wasted some time already and you don’t want these eggs to cool down too much.

A few minutes later, you’re humming softly to yourself and the eggs when a smaller troll, barely younger than you, falls in step beside you. There’s something strange about the shape of her torso, not distinctly noticeable but undeniably there; she herself was killed in a collapse not too long ago. She’s holding a basket of eggs as well, you notice as she amiably joins in with the words to your song. “Cover your crystal eyes, and let your colors bleed and blend with mine... Making, uh-- motherfuck, forgot the lyrics.”

You laugh. “‘Sup, Ellane?”

“Thirsty as shit,” she replies frankly.

“Mm, I feel ya. Should check in with Ya’alei? Motherfucker might got something to spare,” you suggest. Ellane nods. “Mine best friend got me all fed couple nights ago,” you add, some pride in your tone.

She cocks her head. “Who?”

“Karkat.”

Her eyes widen, a grin playing across her face. “The cute cerulean who was here like last week? He is, so. Oh.”

You give another soft laugh, keeping an eye on your basket. “He’s the only cerulean you ever met, sister.”

“Yeah, but I’ve seen them in movies. He’s motherfucking cute. Have you ever met another cerulean, anyways?”

Shrug affably. “Nah, I ain’t. Got a good point.”

“Was he the one you went out with?” Her gaze traces the colorful shapes on the cavern walls as she moves past them.

“Yeah.” You smile at the memory.

“Sweet messiahs, that must have been so cool. How was that, anyways?”

“Some miracle shit. Brother took me to see some wildflowers and all, we sat around most the night. Hardly wanted to come back.” There’s probably some totally obvious note of disproportionate happiness in your voice.

She quirks an eyebrow. “So are you pale for him or what?”

“Yeah,” you reply simply. The two of you reach the entrance to the incubation cavern and head inside, navigating around clutches of eggs to find an open space. This area is tinged with the sulfurous smell of the hot air channeled up into this chamber from the boiling wells deep below. You step over one of the naturally occurring vents that line the wall of the cavern, feeling its intense heat on your legs-- it reminds you of the sweeps before the game, when you were the youngest troll in the caverns and your relatively diminutive size made you the perfect candidate to lower yourself down into the vents and locate blockages or problems. It reminds you of crawling for what felt like weeks through narrow winding tunnels, sometimes having to press your back and feet against the sides so you didn’t fall, of scraped shoulders and skinned knees and damp clothing, of a parched tongue that painfully juxtaposed the air so humid you thought you’d suffocate, of heat rashes and ambiguous chemical burns, of having to grope your way along the wall through total and inexhaustible darkness. 

Motherfuck, you wish you had your bioluminescence then. Maybe you’ll go back down there sometime. You smile and continue to follow Ellane, breaking your trance with “Sorry, what’d you motherfucking say?”

“Does he know?” she repeats.

“Don’t think so,” you say as she sets her basket down and lays a thick cover out in a wide, shallow depression in the cavern floor. “Ain’t trying to make it known, but ain’t tryna hide it neither.”

“Are you gonna make a move?”

“Nope. Motherfucker ain’t any way, like, available for that feelings shit, nor interested in a brother. Just friend shit.” You set down your own basket and start transferring the eggs to the cover.

She examines one of her eggs and then sets it aside with a little sigh. “And you’re happy with that?”

“Sure thing.” You smile down at the eggs. “I love him, ya know, don’t need nothing back. Brother knows I’m there for him, that’s the best I motherfuckin’ need.” You know if he knew how you feel, he’d try to cut ties with you; you know it’s bound to happen sometime. But he’s here for now, and you’re happy with that, and the little pining lump in the center of your chest just reminds you how good you felt when he was yours. And that’s not a bad thing. You squint at the ceiling, trying to fit words together. “It’s, uh. You know, tou’na leiva, for a motherfucker, like takalou na’e hekemai? Reke ali’i jeya fe’all, gaiye pala he works shit out. It all... hennai ali’e ta, last time. Kinda, um, ehuwei te’a. Miracle shit.”

She gives a little nod. “Ah, I got you. Ca’ali te, brother.”

You adjust an egg in the clutch with a laugh. “Yeah, ca’ali te.” Ellane reaches over to you and wipes at what you assume is a spot of smudged paint near your jaw, starting to hum another song. You quickly check your messages again; before Kerede’s recent message about the shawl for his moirail is one from Tavros, which does hurt a little, as fresh wounds tend to do. You smile, at her in thanks and at yourself for being able to help Tavros out as well as you can.

The mineral deposits in the incubation cavern glimmer as you and Ellane make your way out, the light from your bodies reflecting against the crystals, and you take a moment to take in the huge murals that illuminate the walls nearly as much as your bioluminescence does. They bear lines of scripture, depict messiahs and cavern workers and flowering trees and moon cycles, scenes of violence and kindness.

The caverns are beautiful, you think for the hundred thousandth time over the course of your life, all decked out in centuries’ worth of paints and stardust stains in every color imaginable, all full of siblings in their own paints and flowers and stardust singing songs and performing ancient rites and lighting their paths with the radiance of their own bodies. Making inks and baskets and clothes purely for the love of making. No wildflowers could be this vibrant, you think. You work hard, all of you, scraped shoulders and blistered palms and crushed ribs, hands grasping blindly in the dark, purely for the sake of creating something good, and you have. Here, deep beneath the surface of Alternia, is the garden of the sun.

These caverns must have been a lifeless place before the Faith was born-- you can’t imagine how difficult it must have been for your people back when they were really slaves. And without the Faith, they still would be. Without the Faith, you can only imagine that these caverns, here beautiful, the garden of the sun, would be dark and empty.

You like to think that you’re like the caverns.

[botgal]

More former herostuck ideas I came up with cause they’re fun.

(Lots of Vantas Bros. and Signless stuff)

- Though they would be mentioned little, the Beforus ancestors are the parents of the Alternian ancestors (a.k.a. the parents of the beta and alpha trolls). The only exception being the scientist that Signless’s male genetic information came from, since he technically only donated genetic material [he’s dead].

- The Signless was originally developed in the lab he was created to act as a living cure for all known diseases. With his ability to control his own body down to a genetic level (with some limitations), it’s theorized that if he were to develop cancer, he could simply cause the cancer to terminate itself. He could even alter his appearance by changing expression of his hair, skin, and eye color, along with other physical traits. Were he to obtain a virus, he could speed up creation of antibodies to destroy it. The idea would be to take these antibodies and recreate them to use in other humans and animals for all major viruses, and other applications for diseases.

~ Despite original peaceful intent behind his creation, the people behind the project decided to alter him instead when they entered an unexpected period of majorly destructive villain activity caused by the Condesce. He was reconstituted and injected with nanobots which he couldn’t get rid of, which placed him under a mind controlled state for their uses.

~ When placed into situations of extreme stress, Signless’s body undergoes a severe and drastic change where his heart rate slows, adrenaline is released without the fear response, pain receptors completely deaden, and his muscles enter a state where they are able to output 100% capacity of strength usage, making him stronger and faster than normal. It wears him out, but this effectively puts him into a ‘Bloodlust’ mode where he seeks out whatever is identified by his body as a threat and seeks to eliminate it. The nanobots placed into him can induce it on command by creating certain stimuli and cause him to hone in on whatever ‘threat’ the controllers of these nanobots choose. This ability was considered feared by heroes and villains alike, because it basically made him into a nigh unstoppable terminator who would stop at nothing until he succeeded. One can always tell when ‘Bloodlust’ is activated because his eyes, normally slate gray, turn blood red.

~ Karkat and Kankri both have all the abilities Signless did, but don’t know how to use them, so they’re for the most part normal. The only time they normally exhibit any of his abilities is if ‘Bloodlust’ is activated, at which point they get the same gray to red eyes and act like the Signless does. They may or may not learn the whole disease thing intentionally or unintentionally. They only ever use their abilities subconsciously, in that they rarely, if ever, get sick, and if they do symptoms which should last a week or so usually go on for a day maximum.

~ Though uninvolved as heroes, Dolorosa, Psiioniic, and Disciple were all in the scientific field working on the project that made Signless while in civilian lives. Disciple and Signless fell in love, but were never able to act on it due to the nature of their work and him being considered a test subject. Disciple was a widow at the time she met him, after she’d already had Nepeta and Meulin with her now dead husband. None of them were aware of his double usage as an assassination weapon because they were all under the impression of him being a volunteer, not a genetic creation.

~ Signless disappeared sometime after Karkat and Kankri were made, believed to be alive but no one knows where. Dolorosa, Psiioniic, and Disciple only found out about the boys after he’d vanished, but by that point they’d lived a good many years growing up in the labs (Kankri was 12, Karkat 6). Disciple tried to take them in with her and her girls, but the agency regulating former hero and villain activity deemed them under their jurisdiction due to Signless’s actions as an assassin weapon. Hence why they’re both under agent Spades Slick’s care.

- Agent Slick is currently in a relationship with Agent Paint, who located the boys to him for care. He keeps in touch with his old gang who aren’t part of the agency, but always ready to step in and break some kneecaps for old times sake.

- Darkleer was the first ‘villain’ to enter the program. Handmaid was the last.

- Disciple was the first of the ‘heroes’ to enter, Summoner the last.

- At least two generations of Amporas have had some sort of feelings for the Condesce, Dualscar and his father (Beforus Eridan). Cronus may or may not have flirted with her once he was old enough, but mostly goes for Meenah. Eridan pretty much sticks to Feferi or Vriska.

- Despite former rivalries, the villains tend to stick fairly close in terms of communication. It’s an unspoken vow amongst them that if any of each others’ children are in danger, they should step in if they happen upon it. Developed mainly out of necessity since their families still face stigma from the actions they took in their youth.

- Summoner is the odd dog out in the heroes because he preferred to work solo in the ‘old days’ and because of his old flame with Mindfang.

- The children of heroes and villains tend to mix better than their parents do, with some friendships and even relationships forming across lines. But there are still often conflicts between those of a hero and a villain whose parents had strong feuds or rivalries in the past.

[transformationstuck]

Everyone knew the Meteor’s transportalizers weren’t perfect. Sometimes people would come out with all their clothes on back-to-front, or half of someone’s grubloaf would be missing. So far, however, no troll or human had ever been affected by these glitches. So when Vriska stepped onto the transportalizer pad to head towards the kitchen, she didn’t think much of it. What was the worst that could happen?

As it turns out, the glitches weren’t limited to inanimate objects. When Vriska re-appeared on the exit pad, her entire torso was missing. She had no arms, no breasts – her head sat directly above her navel.

Naturally, she freaked out. She yelped and fell over, unused to her body’s new center of mass. She hit her head on the side of the pad, and groaned in pain. She was confused, trying to get her bearings. She repeatedly tried to push herself up, but without arms she couldn’t do any more than roll around on the floor. Eventually, she pusher her head up against a wall, and by gradually pushing herself closer she was able to right herself.

Okay. So she didn’t have arms or a torso anymore. That sucked.

She tentatively took a step forward, feeling out her balance, and almost fell over again. She leaned back against the wall, and tried again. And again. And again. She fell over many, many times, but eventually something clicked within her mind, and suddenly she could walk and run and jump without any issues. The troll think-pan was weird.

Vriska knew she was stuck like this. Throughout all the times the transportalizer had malfunctioned, it had never once created something new – only moved existing materials around or taken things away. She would have to live the rest of her life like this, which given that she was god tier, may well be unending. So she resolved not to wallow in self-pity and would-have-beans. Instead, she committed to learning how to live like this. It might take sweeps, but she would re-learn how to do everything.

So she stepped back onto the transportalizer, praying that it wouldn’t take more of her body away. Luckily it did not, and she quickly stepped back into her room, pulling the door closed behind her and sliding the lock over with her teeth. She wasn’t ready to let anyone else see her just yet.

Vriska set about trying to do some simple tasks in her new truncated form. She tried sitting down and standing up again, then lying down. She took off her jeans, unbuttoning them with her mouth and rubbing up against a wall to pull them down. She couldn’t manage to get her panties off using the same method, but she knew she could using some sort of hook.

She ran into problems, though, when she tried to put her jeans back on. They’d crumpled up on the floor, and while she could flatten them out and wriggle her feet into the waistband, she couldn’t shuffle herself into the legs very far.

It was around about this time that Vriska started feeling a heat in her loins. It started off small, just occasional flickers of warmth here and there, but over time it built up to an unbearable level. She’d never been this horny before. Was this her new body’s fault?

Her priorities quickly shifted from learning how to perform basic tasks to learning how to get herself off. She tried leaning her head over to see if her mouth could reach, but it quickly became apparent that that wasn’t going to happen. She tried rutting against the side of her recuperacoon, rubbing her nook against it through her panties, but it just wasn’t giving her the satisfaction she needed. She groaned, frustrated, moving faster, rutting harder, trying to catch her clit on something, but to no avail. The haze of arousal was consuming her mind, leaving her unable to think of anything but pleasuring herself.

Over time, it slowly became apparent to the lust-addled Vriska that she wasn’t going to be able to get herself off. But the haze was still all-pervading, and she couldn’t focus on anything through it. What remained of her higher mental faculties came to a conclusion: she needed to get fucked.

She went over to her end-table, grasping the handle between her teeth and walking backwards, pulling the draw further and further out until it fell to the floor, its contents scattering everywhere. She lay down and took a genetic material suppressor between her teeth before pushing up against her recuperacoon to stand back up. She unlocked the door by pushing on the sliding lock with one of her horns, and pushed the door open. She ran down the hallway, clad in naught but her panties, her hair fluttering behind her. It would have been a surreal sight to anybody watching. She reached the closest inhabited respiteblock to hers – Karkat’s – and pushed the door open.

Karkat had been sitting down talking to Dave over his crab communicator when he heard his door burst open. There was only one person on this meteor who barged through doors like that; and so, steeling himself for the arduous task ahead, he quickly informed Dave of the Serket storm that had come to his respiteblock before closing the connection and turning around.

What the fuck.

Standing in his doorway was Vriska, but it was not the Vriska he’d seen at breakfast this morning. Her entire upper body had simply vanished, leaving her as no more than a head atop a set of hips and legs. She was looking up at him, her eyes literally clouded over with lust, and she had a material suppressor clasped between her teeth. Once she’d noticed that she had his attention she sauntered towards him, rocking her ample ass side-to-side as she did so.

Karkat gulped. He knew damn well where this was going.

Vriska dropped the suppressor on the floor next to him, and said one simple sentence:

“Karkat, I need you to fuck me.”

...

“Ah, fuck it”, Karkat thought to himself; “why not? This is clearly a dreambubble hallucination. Might as well have some fun with it.” And so in response he kneeled down on the floor, aligning his face with hers, and kissed her. He held nothing back, and neither did she. Their lips rubbed against each other and their tongues explored each others mouths, touching tips and rubbing up against sharp fangs. When Karkat had had his fill he pulled back and reached down to pick up the material suppressor. He shimmied out of his pants and pulled down his boxers, exposing his erect, red-tipped bulge to the open air.

Almost immediately, Vriska wrapped her mouth around the tip and sucked him in. Her tongue danced across his tip, poking and prodding and licking interchangeably, as she stared to work it further into her wet maw.

Vriska was enraptured. She’d never imagined she’d ever give anyone a blowjob – Vriska Serket knelt for no troll – but here she was, Karkat’s bulge in her mouth, and she wondered why she’d ever thought herself above this; there was nothing to be above. It seemed so perfect to her aroused mind – the soft tip poking into her maw, her tongue working around it, learning what motions caused the troll above her to gasp out in pleasure. It felt good; it felt right; as if her mouth had been made to be wrapped around a bulge, licking and sucking upon it. But, after a minute, she pulled back. As good as it felt to give Karkat a blowjob, she had another hole that was demanding attention from that bulge.

When Vriska let go of his bulge, Karkat knew exactly what she wanted. He rolled the suppressor over his bulge, hooked a finger into Vriska’s panties and pulled them down, exposing her dripping cerulean nook to his gaze. The folds were parted ever-so-slightly, damp with fluids, and her clit was just poking out from behind its hood. It was a beautiful sight, and Karkat sat there for a moment drinking it in. He tentatively pushed a knuckle between her folds, careful to keep his claws well clear, and Vriska shuddered.

He wasted no more time. Double-checking that he had indeed applied the suppressor, he lay down on the floor, grasping Vriska’s ample behind and guiding her above his prick.

Vriska needed no further prompting. Spreading her legs a little, she thrust down and impaled herself full-length upon Karkat’s bulge. Pleasure jolted through her, arcing from one nerve to another, and very quickly her entire body was alight with pleasure. She moaned and sat there for a moment before Karkat’s hands once again found her ass and pulled her back up. She took over from there, thrusting up and down, up and down, moving Karkat’s bulge in and out of her nook. It was hard to keep her balance with no arms, and she almost fell over, but Karkat always caught her before she could slide off his member, helping her right herself and get back to fucking.

For Karkat, the experience was similarly blissful. He never could have imagined how nice it felt to be buried inside a nook. The walls grasped his prick at regular intervals, fluttering tension up and down in time with Vriska’s thrusts. He had his hands constantly cupping Vriska’s ass-cheeks now, not just to help support her, but also just because they felt nice to squeeze between his hands. They were soft and plush, and Vriska moaned whenever he squeezed – especially when his claws broke her skin and droplets of cerulean blood began dripping out.

After a while, he could feel himself nearing orgasm. Even though he knew this Vriska was nothing more than a creation of whatever bubble he was in, his instincts caused him to reach out to Vriska’s crotch and start rubbing lightly around her clit. Vriska moaned throatily, throwing her head back in pleasure, and as she came her nook walls clasped around his prick in a death-grip, and that extra friction was all he needed as well. He came, his bulge expelling red genetic material, all of which was absorbed by the suppressor around his prick. He wanted to lean in and kiss Vriska, wrap his arms around her and dip his tongue deep into her mouth; but her head only came up to his chest, so instead he settled for wrapping his arms around her head and holding her against him, skin-to-skin.

It felt genuine, sincere, real; as if at least a small part of him wanted this to be more than a one-off fuck before she faded away into the aether from whence she’d came.

As both of their orgasms winded down, Vriska pulled her head back slightly, removing her mouth and nose from Karkat’s skin so she could breathe once again.

That... that had been the best five minutes of her entire life. Masturbation had never felt that good; absolutely nothing could compare.

As Karkat yawned above her and he idly ran his fingers through her hair, Vriska rolled her head to the side and leaned into Karkat’s chest, closing her eyes and smiling in pure, unfiltered contentment.

If losing half her body was the price to pay for orgasms that good, then maybe - just maybe - it was worth it.

She fell asleep pressed against Karkat’s chest, cool cerulean blue against boiling mutant red; and for the first time in a sweep, she didn’t dream.

---------------

Image is an edit of this image by planetofjunk. Full-size edit is here. Search term on DA is “swb girl” if you want more like this.

I have no idea if this actually counts as TF enough to put here, but there’s only one way to find out.

[transformationstuck]

Cut the Red Wire

Aradia solo animate-object hybrid TF. Less focus on the transformation itself and more on the effects it causes, especially in regards to worldview and relationship dynamics. Submitted by inhibitionsnullandvoid. Inspired by this Discord log (AO3 is having issues right now so the link may not work).

CONTENT WARNINGS: Temporary character death, semi-explicit gore. (It’s all consensual.)

—–

Aradia turns the final community card over. It’s the 3 of Clubs, which does absolutely nothing for her hand, but she’s still in a decent position with a two-pair regardless. Rose raises by 200, everyone calls, and turns over their cards. Karkat’s two-pair beats Aradia’s with a pair of queens to her nines, and he starts to gather up his winnings.

It’s at this moment that Aradia’s future self decides to warp in, with a future-Rose in tow. Current-Aradia steps up, the newcomer pats her on the shoulder and then sits down to continue playing. Rose also moves to swap places with her future self.

“What the fuck is this hoofbeastmanure‽” Karkat yells, forcing many players to cover their ears. He hadn’t been this loud in quite some time. “I thought we’d already established that time travel defeats the entire fucking purpose of this game after Dave pulled this exact same stunt last time!”

“What,” Dave replies, “like you wouldn’t have done the exact same thing if you were a time player.”

“Firstly, fuck you, and secondly, no I would not have. I, for one,” he says, laying his hand on his chest, “am not one to blatantly screw the integrity of the game up the waste chute at every opportunity, unlike some of us here.”

He sends a sharp stare in Vriska’s direction.

“Whaaaaaaaat? That was one time!”

“It was one time after Rose went all-in; that makes it the same as if you’d been doing it for the entire game, you amoral shit-sponge.”

“That’s not how that-“

“That’s exactly how that works, and you damn well know it!”

“Karkat,” Future-Rose interrupts, laying a hand on his shoulder, “calm down. I promise you that we’re not cheating. The activities me and Aradia are leaving this table to undertake are, quite literally, integral to the survival of several people at this table.”

Current-Rose raises one eyebrow, and then smiles in understanding. “Ah, I see. We’d best be off then; we’re on a timer, after all.”

“Don’t worry guys,” Current-Aradia says, “if I wanted to cheat I’d have just stolen all your boondollars before the game even started!”

Karkat bristles. “But you did do that! That is a thing that you already did.”

“Only because Vriska already did it!”, Future-Aradia explains.

Karkat bangs his head into the table. “Oh my god. How have we not established by now that Vriska is the worst role model in paradox space! This is not a hard concept to wrap your heads around, people-“

“Also Karkat’s gonna have three nines this round!”

Karkat splutters mid-sentence as Vriska cackles maniacally, while current-Aradia and Rose disappear in a flash of red gears, smiling knowingly.

“Integral to our continued survival” indeed.

—–

Aradia first discovered the ability shortly after she went god tier. A solo fraymotif, sitting in a category all on its own.

[Continuous Countdown]

It had no description, no stats page, or usage tutorial. It just existed. For many people, this would be a red flag to leave it well alone.

Aradia, of course, activated it immediately.

At first, nothing seemed to have happened, so she continued perusing her fraymotif index, trying out other anomalous abilities. But after a while, she started hearing a noise, sharp and steady, coming from inside her. It was a noise she, as a time player, knew well.

Tick.

Tick.

Aradia lifted her shirt, looking for the source of the noise, and was surprised to discover a red, digital clock embedded into her belly. It was hard to make out, as she was reading it upside down, but after a few seconds she started figuring it out. The numbers were steading decreasing, the ticking noise was synchronized with the numeric decrements, and a feeling of warmth was growing inside her.

Her body was counting down to something - T minus 5 minutes - and she was excited to find out what.

As the clock ticked down, Aradia began to feel strange. The warmth inside her seemed to migrate between her legs, and her arousal shot through the roof.

T minus 3 minutes, and she was ripping off her clothes, kneading her breasts and pinching her nipple, running her finger delicately around the rim of her clock.

T minus 2 minutes, and her bulge was wrapped tightly around her fingers, squeezing and exploring them. The ticking was getting louder, the warmth in her loins getting greater.

T minus 1 minute, and with every passing second she became more aware of her body – its shape, its arousal, the sweat pouring off it, the contrast between her lowblood heat and the stone slab she laid on. Every curve, every inch of skin, brought to the forefront of her mind. She plunged one hand deep into her nook while she pinched and prodded her breasts with the other, bringing her closer, ever closer, to her climax, the pleasure ramping up in sync with the countdown. Every tick of the clock reverberated through her form, spiking her pleasure every second. As the countdown reached the single digits, everything started accelerating. The warmth expanded to encompass her whole body, and it doubled its temperature in a matter of seconds. She rubbed her nook fanatically, but no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t bring herself to climax. Until…

5; 4; 3; 2…

In that one second, Aradia experienced the most powerful orgasm of her life, screaming out her pleasure to anyone who’d care to hear, as the warmth grew, and grew, and grew, until suddenly, everything changed.

Searing heat. A tear. A loud bang.

For a few blissful moments, Aradia’s reality expanded. She could feel insects buzzing through the air, plants lazily flapping in the breeze, and small mammals burrowing underground; every crack of the world, teeming with life. And in the center of all of it was her, frozen in time, her face an image of rapture as her body exploded; a monument to the beauty of death, amidst this field of life.

And then time unfroze.

And Aradia felt nothing.

—–

Rose was the only one who noticed something was off. Little things, like how Aradia’s hair seemed to sometimes get very disheveled within the space of 10 minutes, or the oddly geometric protrusion in her god tier outfit. But mostly, she noticed the timing. Barring any time travel, every 3 days Aradia would either disappear for half an hour, or tag in a future self if the activity she was performing was important enough. Rose had asked Dave about it, but she told him that Aradia’s time jumps weren’t going any further than a few hours in either direction, so that had ruled out long-term shenanigans as a cause. Finally, after discussing it with Kanaya for a few minutes, she had this to say on the issue.

“Rose I have a very novel idea about how to get to the bottom of this. Be prepared, because this idea is certain to be well outside your purview.”

“Lay it on me, Kanaya,” Rose says, leaning back in her chair.

“Well okay, if you insist, but be forewarned, you asked for this.”

She stands up and walks towards Rose.

“Ahem.”

She places her hands on her matesprit’s shoulders, looking her directly in the eyes.

“Why don’t you just ask her?”

So Rose did ask Aradia, and after some persuasion, she showed her the secret.

It turned out to be the sexiest thing she’d ever witnessed.

While Kanaya was initially quite apprehensive, especially regarding Aradia’s safety, as time went on she became more and more at ease with the whole thing. But the tipping point came when Kanaya first witnessed the explosion first-hand; the slow build-up to a literally explosive crescendo, Aradia getting more and more desperate as the clock ticked down, down, down, until it hit zero. With Rose’s mouth firmly on her bulge, she exploded. Her torso was severed, her legs went flying. Something came arcing through the air towards Kanaya, so she reached out to catch it.

It was Rose’s head, her mouth still wrapped around the remains of Aradia’s bulge. Her neck was leaking blood, absolutely ruining her skirt, but in that moment she didn’t care, because she saw the look in Rose’s eyes. Those wonderful, lavender eyes, coated in some of Aradia’s blood. Those eyes looked up and met Kanaya’s, so many emotions swirling around in them all at once; pain, fear, and arousal. But one stood out above the rest, always at the forefront – one that Kanaya knew well.

Happiness.

And then her eyes defocused, and Kanaya’s matesprit was dead.

She leaned in and kissed Rose’s severed head, tasting a mix of blood, genetic material, and of course Rose herself. There was no response from her matesprit, no tongue reaching out to meet hers, no subtle tilting of the head to give them both more access. There was just Kanaya, kissing her love’s severed head in a room of death.

She became an instant convert.

The three of them never looked back.

—–

“Hey Rose,” Dave says a few seconds after Rose and Aradia’s past-selves warped out, “where’d that green lipstick mark come from anyway. I swear that wasn’t there on past-you. Are you two and Aradia getting up to sexy shenanigans without me?”

Karkat elbows him.

“I mean that’s cool I guess,” he backpedals, “but I’d at least appreciate it if you took some pictures. Not much new porn being made, what with the death of two universes and all.”

Karkat elbows him harder, earning a sharp “Ow” from Dave. Rose meets Aradia’s eyes and they share a small smile.

“Oh, Dave. If only you knew.”

—–

It turns out that Karkat did end up having three nines, but he lost to Aradia’s full house. The screaming fit that ensued was truly a sight to behold.