#thank you for staying with me this long

[stil-lindigo]

lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)

if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.

--

no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.

I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.

I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.

If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.

[zuzu-draws]

Long-Haired Obito Art Request for @lucynda ! Your ask was a bit too long for me to post so i'm answering it in this way ;D This version of Obito is like...one of the most vicious and brutal renditions of him ._.

[chloesimaginationthings]

Congrats you got another haiku bot post

HAIKU BOT MOMENT!!!

(Original post)

[usikunox]

Merry Christmas! 💜🎄🖤

[enii]

Through the good times and the bad💕

[astraystayyh]

happy birthday to my hyune. hyunjin who wrote a poem about stay’s eyes and how they shine brighter than any stars. hyunjin who paints old couples because he believes love should be eternal. hyunjin who needs to be chased off the stage by staff because he wants to greet stays longer. hyunjin who always reassures stays that they have a long time left together. hyunjin who reads poetry before bed. hyunjin who writes about love so beautifully as if he is the embodiment of it. hyunjin who says he wants to remain strong as to not hurt stays. hyunjin who says you need to practice with your 200% to show 100%. hyunjin who loves reading books. hyunjin who always tells stays to eat well. hyunjin who wears his heart on his sleeve. hyunjin who started a stay counseling center to listen to stay’s problems. hyunjin who wrote if love is everything, then there is nothing left for me. hyunjin who trained really hard because he refused to be just a pretty face. hyunjin who said that he loves easily, gets hurt easily, regrets easily then repeats the process because isn’t that what life is about. hyunjin who said that the wounds caused by humans are also healed by humans. hyunjin who remains hopeful and loving despite it all. hyunjin who eats with his eyes closed. hyunjin who loves going to art museums. hyunjin who said that there isnt a team that loves each other as much as skz does. hyunjin who said that there should always be a Stray kids before his name. hyunjin who loves so freely and who i love. you grew up so well my hyune 💓 please be happy forever.

[shakingparadigm]

fav alnst round so far? (mines is round 6 because i love pain and sorry to break it to you but I literally had no reaction when best boy ivan died.hes dead guys accept it.)

Favorite ALNST round... I'd have to say ROUND 5. The concept of the whole thing is just so spectacular not only in set design but in character dynamics as well. The despair and mockery that lines the whole thing is fantastic.

I particularly adore the way this round further connects the concept of death with the color white. The stage which Luka and Mizi perform on is fully white in color because it's built from the bones of an ancient creature, something of a memorial site. In certain shots, the spine of this creature is very clear. The whole area is ethereal and invokes not only a sense of reverence, but unease, too. It's haunting, almost hollow, and just like its origin, lifeless.

The moon that shines behind Luka is almost as big and bright as a white dwarf, a dying star that has exhausted itself of life.

And of course, the association with death is further emphasized once images of Sua appear.

There's something to be said about the fact that this stage is from the bones of an ancient creature, one that was respected enough for its bones to be repurposed in its honor. A deep reverence, worship, even.

It's painfully fitting for Luka to dance upon the remains of a creature so revered while he toys with Sua's image. A form of mockery, of disrespect, especially to the one who worshipped her. In both the literal and metaphorical sense, he tramples over dead gods.

It's important to note that in this round there are two performers but three participants: Mizi, Luka, and Sua. The feeling of death is something that permeates throughout the entire round because everyone involved has been forced to face it. This shared trait manifests itself as their most striking visual aspect: their white attire.

With the insight gained from Luka's relationship with Heperu, it's safe to say that Luka has experienced the feeling of death firsthand. He has quite literally died and then come back to life.

There's the factor of his purple fingertips, a result of his weak physical condition that keeps him on the precipice of life and death. Combined with his extremely pale complexion, his imperturbable disposition and obssession with heartbeats, Luka seems like a body on its way to a corpse, desperately clinging onto his last hopes of life. Staving off the coldness of death for as long as possible and monitoring his own body so that demise is confined to just the tips of his fingers.

Sua's connection to death is obvious. She has died, she is death.

A point of interest, however, is the fact that while everyone is dressed in white, only Luka and Sua share the colors of white and black. They both have these colors in their design, but in opposite places. The black of Sua's design lies on top of her white, while vice-versa for Luka as his lies at the bottom. It works exceptionally well with their state of their characters. Sua as the dead that crosses into the living, and Luka as the living that toes the line of death.

As someone who watched her god die in front of her own eyes, Mizi dons a gown of pure white just like the others. The difference is her second color, a light pink layer resting atop her dress.

Pink has associations with innocence and childishness, and in its more washed out and subdued state (light pink = pink mixed with white, innocence tainted by death) it's a perfect fit for the circumstances.

It's only during her aggressive outburst, when Mizi has death directly pointed at her that the pink layer begins to rip. Completely shedding her innocence, giving way to complete white. Dressing her for death.

Luckily, Hyuna arrives just in time (clad in black, life) to save her.

ROUND 5 has always been a complete masterpiece to me, and the more I think about it the better it gets. A dying man trying to stay alive, a white-clad widow and the haunting apparition of her dead god all performing this sick dance of death upon the bones of a creature who was exploited for spectacle and performance.

[doodleodds]

Me? Uploading a Halloween comic on November 18th, almost four whole-ass weeks late???? Yeah that’s uh. yup. yeah

Thanks for reading! :) <3

[canisalbus]

Hello! I love your art- you have a real talent for expressive eyes. You're a great cartoonist, and I can't wait to see more of your work

It's a little silly, but I just wanted to say- don't beat yourself up for having a reaction to needles after a bad experience. On a moral level, yes, but also a practical one.

It's normal for a body to react to a bad experience with fear. That's what fear evolved to do, warn you about something that could go wrong next time.

However, fear can be reinforced. If your body responds to a stimulus with fear, and then you feel a negative emotion around that memory, your nervous system goes "Wow! That was so bad that even thinking about it stresses me out. I'd better make sure to never let this happen again. Time to dial up the fear signal!"

Being kind to yourself about something frustrating or painful is hard in good conditions, and I don't want to minimize that. This isn't "don't let it bother you" or "just get over it" or "think positive" advice.

When a fear of needles happens to me again (the fear comes and goes), I try to treat it like I would a food aversion resulting from food poisoning. You know when you eat something bad, get sick and then the thought of the food is really gross for awhile? Like that!

I try to let myself be mildly annoyed, but not so much it gets my blood pressure up. Sadness doesn't seem to extend the length of the fear either. But anger, guilt, or shame for me really seem to reinforce the fear reactions.

Your mileage will vary, of course! For me, I went from no fear of needles, to fainting when an IV was put in, back to no fear with patience and time. Maybe this can be a bit of hope for you too! I wish you luck and a smooth road!

.

[littencloud9]

sits. hi lena!!! tell me some kunichuu hcs :D

sits with you excitedly. KUNICHUU HCS!!

chuuya is a very spontaneous person and has date ideas flying around their head 24/7, but they know that kunikida prefers proper planning, so they have his schedule memorised so they can set up dates

aya met chuuya and Immediately assumed they were married

kunikida swapped out his ideal partner list for a list of reasons he loves chuuya. chuuya will never find out about it (they did. ranpo snitched)

chuuya braids kunikida’s hair <3

u know how it’s tradition to give the person you like the second button of your uniform? instead of that kunikida gave chuuya his red tie. chuuya keeps it on their wrist

they are Always going on rooftops illegally. it’s what happens when your partner manipulates gravity

chuuya is kinda bad at asking for physical affection so they’ll do it in the most roundabout way possible.

“kunikida your hand is SO cold what is wrong? thank god i wear gloves so my hands are warm.” “…thank god indeed.”

this is a kunichuu rite of passage but chuuya calls kunikida pretty boy

chuuya CANNOT take what they dish. kunikida calls them pretty back and they explode into a million pieces

kenji is delighted to have a second big brother to look up to. he’s always begging kunikida to bring chuuya over so they can talk

they are So annoying about their relationship. kunikida receives a gift from a ‘secret admirer’ all the time. chuuya wears their hickeys on Full Fucking Display

if kunikida is working too hard chuuya Will barge in and plant themself on his lap and proceed to be as annoying and disruptive as possible

chuuya also has a tendency to overwork. when they get home, kunikida is there to run them a bath and massage them until they relax

they’ve been caught making out too many times that atsushi, yosano etc makes an effort to be EXTREMELY loud before entering the office

also chuuya gets home when kunikida wakes up and will refuse to sleep until they got a kiss first

they enjoy stargazing together!

they also bring kenji/aya on field trips all the time

chuuya does not let kunikida pay. they are not above shoving kunikida to the floor if it means they get to pay

hand kisses from chuuya and forehead kisses from kunikida…

[thevoidisback]

Let me be clear for ya'll out there real quick cuz ya'll need to know smh about me

will do

Asked questions

Rp so put /rp in your ask

QnA any time make sure to put *📝* in there

Smh funny to put a smile on you!

will NOT do

Nsfw 🔞

Proshipping bc that's just wrong

Not talk about my irl self do to insecurity so that will be a red flag

Don't force me to do things I don't like

I will delete your ask if I don't like it

I'll redesign your oc if you pay $10 on cash app so DM me for that because I ain't gonna do it for free!

Please do respect my opinions on what I tell you on my thoughts of your ask because if you don't like then leave

Don't ask for a face reveal it's uncomfortable...same for the age I don't feel comfortable with telling

Don't try any dumbass shit and I mean that literally

About Narrator!

She is literally my self prisona of me so of course she has adhd and autism and will probably procrastinate some times because that's how I am most likely....Womp womp I know it sounds lazy of me but bare with me here

I do love candy and chocolate! Personality I enjoy red velvet cupcakes because it's just chocolate dyed red lmao

I do some voice acting for Narrator w/ my irl friends and she honestly loves it because N.V aka Narrator void or just Narrator is actually a UK oc although in irl I was born in Louisiana then move to New Boston so Narrator has a British voice so remember that when she answers your questions

Narrator has control over Void and Silly void but she doesn't really bothers because she wants them to enjoy their void lives however they please

Do remember I have other oc's but I don't pay attention to them unless you ask who are they and I'll show you all of them!

Remember if you have any sad or just feeling down DM because I am a very caring person who will listen but if you want I can do my best to comfort you in any way

I do not have discord no more because I've done a lot of unresponsible things and got in trouble twice bc I let somebody "rp" with me and I fell for two different people and now I'm very uncomfortable that I let it happen without realizing it so I will never again plan to reinstall discord very sorry but not really

I'm very mature so I can handle g0r3, d3∆th, b1o0d, s3lf h∆rm, all that weird or crazy shit but I don't really support any of this type of act in irl so don't do it for content just go to a therapist about it now if it's nsfw or something else I can handle it but I still don't support actually doing it because there are kids on some social platforms plus the nsfw thing is just apart of humanity we can't control the internet so remember that

I dislike Gen Alpha kids it's just I personally think they are annoying af and hard to talk to without having to hear them say/text "skipitbi Gaytt rizz" type shit so you will be blocked immediately by me without no hesitation and if you don't understand why is because I'm a Gen Z girl because I was born in the 2000's when growing up so I'm some what brain rotten but not completely so remember that please and thank you!

I have a lot of different types of music I like listening to as in some: silly, random edit audio TikTok songs, Phonk songs, songs that just hit different, meme related songs, jazz/lofi because it helps me sleep at nights, Fnf songs- just a lot to keep up with

What fandoms I like?

I'll gladly tell ya!!

Fundamental paper education school

Poppy play time!

Lmk!

Pressure (roblox)

Doors (roblox)

Block tales (roblox)

Gacha life/ Gacha club

Sky children of the light

Cult of the lamb (just because of that damn black ram they are just too cute don't blame me!!)

Hellva boss and Hazbin hotel

Dandy's world (cuz I keep seeing this shit everywhere and yes I've seen the game play but I didn't play it myself so stfu!)

Phighting (yes I'm very much aware of this game on roblox and yes I gave it a try with my friend it was fun and I like it wish my computer didn't crash on it womp womp!)

Cookie run kingdom

Regretevator

Friday night funky

Five nights at Freddy

More coming soon if I fine fandoms I like any time soon

Who I am close with?

@unknownartistsmf

-> @out-of-nowhere231 <-

((she doesn't post much but I suggest you look her up...she doesn't have any asked questions also the same do and don't do apply to her as well))

@sam-the-tomboy

That's who I fully trust online sorry @babyevenfromgovacation but idk 'bout you nothing personal just don't fully trust you is all...

Thank you for reading all this! I had to rethink about everything but I do still love ya'll even though I don't know ya'll but stay cool!

Side note: I don't give a fuck how old you are just be honest with me and if your uncomfortable with it then I understand but still just let me know thank you!

This User loves Halloween!

I don't have TikTok because of the dark truth about it so sorry if ya followed me there and yes I do still have roblox but I suggest you just follow my user that way if I'm online you can join faster with me and my friends

Roblox user: Moaldr1278

[difeisheng]

duel meta

i think a good aspect of the conflict present in the donghai fight is the fact that li xiangyi and di feisheng are each seeing the other as representing incompatible things, and this isn't something that began with the duel but it was part of what doomed them by the end of it.

it has to do with how both of them view their places in the jianghu, in general. li xiangyi by this point has become the symbol of sigumen. he embodies everything it stands for, and by extension of sigumen's prestige, he embodies what those in the jianghu striving for righteousness should look like. he's the legend of both this generation and the next, and when he snaps at shan gudao, li xiangyi literally considers himself the beating heart of sigumen. without him, it can't exist. he has become one with every person he represents while still apart from them, embedded in this fame across the jianghu and all its eyes on him. it's a burden, but while he's placed on the pedestal, li xiangyi still attempts to do good by all who put him on it. so here he stands, trying to shoulder it all.

di feisheng, on the other hand, has always seen his position on an individual level. he's associated with jinyuanmeng and he built it, yes, but that power is not something he's thrown himself into as its leader. he wouldn't say that jinyuanmeng wouldn't exist if he was gone; once di feisheng is reinstated as mengzhu in the present day, the first thing he does is to hand it over to jiao liqiao. his actions throughout the story after that are largely separate from those of jinyuanmeng, and he makes little effort to involve his subordinates except for a few specific people. to di feisheng, his achievements and strength ultimately rest on himself as a swordsman, and his skill compared to other distinguished people at the top of the jianghu. we see that on the night he frees jiao liqiao. he's not here to take over forces or resources, he's just here for one man and the rank he holds.

(i would argue that the power di feisheng did accumulate through jinyuanmeng is for two reasons. one, so that he had enough people behind him to apparently rival li xiangyi, and two, to keep him safe from the di mansion. but that's a different topic.)

so when the war between sigumen and jinyuanmeng breaks out, its final act on the donghai ship is a standoff between two people: one who views himself as representing a collective, and another who considers himself in that moment a swordsman on his own. and this greatly influences how both of them treat that fight.

to li xiangyi, this is a duel contextualized by leadership. because he will take the responsibility for sigumen and his side of the fight, he's focusing all that grief over shan gudao, all that anger and blame on di feisheng alone, as the opposing head of the forces he's been clashing with. since the name of li xiangyi cannot be separated from sigumen (and by now i don't think li xiangyi could define himself as person from image even if he tried), now he attaches di feisheng to jinyuanmeng in his attempt to force him to take accountability. in li xiangyi's eyes, they're really not people in this duel. they're the faces of hundreds more warriors, and every move they make has the lives of those people hanging onto them.

to di feisheng, the fact that they stand alone on that ship means they are alone, cut loose from everyone and everything else in an isolated space. this is a fight in its purest form now. just two men and their blades, relying on their own physical/spiritual strength and nothing else. it's what di feisheng has been waiting for, this chance to challenge li xiangyi where both of them stand on truly equal ground. there is no sigumen or jinyuanmeng dragging them down. they've cut through all the noise of the jianghu that he doesn't care for, and they're just di feisheng and li xiangyi, two highly skilled people who get to see who's stronger in an environment no one else can influence.

(it's worth noting, i think, that di feisheng chose the location of the duel by situating himself and therefore li xiangyi who would find him out at sea, even though the majority of their forces were fighting on land. his men on the ship complained about how horrid a decision it was to be at sea in that weather (it's the first dialogue of the show), but this ensured that any outside/not predetermined interference during their head-to-head would be much more difficult.)

these views or motivations are so terribly at odds with each other. li xiangyi is fighting out of desperate rage and the need for retribution, weighed down more than ever by all the people who look up to him and depend on him to seek justice. di feisheng is fighting for fairly-won status and glory, and in his eyes, for the first time they have been granted the freedom to go against one another where nothing else needs to matter.

it shows in the moves both of them choose to make. namely, that di feisheng fights with more restraint, while li xiangyi fights quite viciously. i'm going to focus a bit more on di feisheng's role here, because i think this contrast on his part is interesting and works to subvert his initial reputation/image, something significant to his character throughout the show (or at least more than it is for li xiangyi).

i would argue that di feisheng is on the defensive for the majority of this fight, as his side has been this entire war. in the duel choreography he's blocking, dodging, or backing up a significant amount more than li xiangyi, who keeps pressing, launching new offenses wherever possible to search for an answer and revenge. there's a clear give and take between them as the fight progresses. and thanks to how this dynamic plays out, and with the background of these characters' motivations, there are three key pauses in the duel that stand out to me. they're all points where di feisheng could have moved on or killed li xiangyi, even as he was the one being attacked, but chose not to.

the first is when li xiangyi is pressed up against the ship wall, di feisheng's sword against li xiangyi's cheek, enough to cut but not enough to lethally wound. they're locked in this position for a good few seconds before either of them react. di feisheng could press forward and cleave his skull, since li xiangyi can't parry him. i couldn't get a good screenshot, but shaoshi is buried in di feisheng's shoulder here. for that di feisheng could also back up and away, given his injury. but he does neither. instead he freezes in place, doing nothing until li xiangyi draws his blade out of di feisheng, and makes the next move.

the second is when there's a lull in the action on the roof of the ship cabin. we get di feisheng's line “一个剑客不该有弱点” ("a swordsman shouldn't have weaknesses") and li xiangyi pausing as the bicha poison begins to take effect. this is another very long break where di feisheng could've taken advantage of li xiangyi being distracted, but he stands still. we learn later that he didn't even know li xiangyi had been poisoned then, so this isn't him dramatically pausing to revel in li xiangyi's pain. his opponent wasn't immersed in the fight, so di feisheng waited until he was. he only moves forward to meet him when li xiangyi chooses to.

these breaks turn the duel into a dance, almost, where di feisheng is letting li xiangyi lead and only moving with him (when they're both in the physical state to). he's fighting with too much respect and leniency to be out for blood the way li xiangyi is, with everyone else on that ship already dead. they're fighting the duel through vastly different lenses and neither of them have realized it yet.

that point of realization is this last pause, di feisheng's blade stabbed into li xiangyi while he stands over him in the rain. the fact that di feisheng isn't actively trying to kill is apparent in two different details here. the first is that di feisheng's blade missed li xiangyi's heart, even though his accuracy as a swordsman is incredible. the second is that, once again, he waits until li xiangyi can move again before attempting to do anything further— except this time he yells that he's won.

this is the moment it genuinely struck for me that their perspectives on this duel are so different. di feisheng dealt li xiangyi a wound that is serious in the moment, but for someone of li xiangyi's strength, he'll be fine in the end. it only takes him out in the short term, and within that time, what di feisheng is waiting for after calling his victory is for li xiangyi to concede the duel. to say it's over, and give over his name as the top swordsman. that's what di feisheng was after.

to him, when it came to li xiangyi, defeating the man and killing him were two different things.

but this isn't where it all stops, because li xiangyi didn't know this (how could he?) and he's fighting for more than ensuring his name remains above anyone else's. di feisheng is fighting cold, but li xiangyi still has so much anger, so much left to do. so much at stake and on his shoulders and 'defeat' and 'giving up' are luxuries he doesn't have.

when the blade in him and the poison taking greater hold pushes li xiangyi into needing a last stand, he refuses to hold anything back. he's an opportunist now, and di feisheng has given him an opening. so out comes wenjing in a surprise attack, there goes di feisheng impaled against the mast, and it all goes to hell. di feisheng can't fight honourably because li xiangyi is coming for his life, and for the first time after a pause like this, he's the one who attacks first.

their last skirmish is because now there's nowhere else for either of them to go. all other motivations have been shattered. either one of them must break, or they must fall together. and the latter is exactly what they do.

perhaps, in a thousand other worlds, the duel went differently. but in this one, li xiangyi fought because he thought they both represented everyone, and di feisheng fought because he believed they represented nothing more than themselves, and neither man could understand that the other didn't share their perspective. signalled though it was throughout the fight, and evenly matched though they were, they were fighting two separate battles on that ship. it wasn't anything they could help, only the result of contrasting lives in the jianghu and what it had shaped them both into. and so there was nothing that could come of that duel except for both of them to lose.

[misericorsalvator]

An Epitaph

Henry didn't know where he was. It was cold, freezing, but that was all he could tell, from the sharp chill that tore through his damp clothes, to the frigid air that felt like icicles in his lungs when he breathed. Even if he was someplace familiar, it would have been impossible to tell through the veil of rime in the air, the thick hoar that coated the ground. But wherever he was, he had to find shelter. soon, before his limbs grew any number that they already were and he lost the three fingers he had left on his right hand to frostbite. It took a good deal of walking, trudging through the snow, before he found something resembling sanctuary. A rocky hovel dug deep into a mountainside he hadn't even noticed was there. The crooked mountaintop loomed far overhead like a wind-swept pine tree, towering over the barren expanse and shielding the small patch of land near the cave's entrance from the worst of the snowfall. It was a narrow fit, the opening more narrow than a coffin, but it opened up into a wide chamber beyond, dark, lit only by the little light reflecting on the snow outside.

Panic stabbed at him suddenly. That chamber felt familiar, though he couldn't recall from where. The rockface of the walls was smooth, man-made, and the stalactites hanging from the domed ceiling above were unnatural, all the same length, jagged and sharpened to fine points. But he had no time to waste on the unnerving interior. The weather outside was getting worse, the wind howling like wolves on a hunt, and soon his shelter would be just as cold and dangerous as the outside. He had to think, find a way to keep the warmth in. Henry returned to the entrance. He twisted around in the narrow space as best he could and began piling up snow with his numb hands, stacking it, pressing it into shape, mouthing breathless curses to himself, until he had built a solid wall halfway up to his neck. It should last. He didn't know for how long, but at least for now, until he could catch his breath. It had to last.

Henry slumped against the wall of the cave. The barrier he had built offered some protection, but he could still feel the cold creeping in, seeping through the gaps and cracks in the snow. A damp chill gnawed at his bones, freezing the air in his lungs. He knew he had to keep moving, to do something, anything, to stay warm and awake. He couldn’t afford to fall asleep. Not here. Not now. But his limbs were leaden and his body creaked in protest with every movement. His teeth chattered as he tried to think, tried to remember where he was and how he had gotten there. The harder he tried, however, the more his thoughts seemed to slip away, like sand through his fingers. Panic clawed at his chest once more as he looked around the cavern. The walls seemed to close in, the smooth stone shimmering with a thin layer of rime frost. The ceiling above with the unnaturally sharp stalactites, loomed over him like a mouth full of fangs. He had to get out.

Henry pushed himself off the wall, his legs shaking beneath him. The snow was piling up faster now, further in through the entrance than the wall he had built, and he frantically began to shovel it away with his hands, trying to clear a path through the narrow gap. He shovelled harder, floundered, grappled til his fingers were too numb to move, but for every tiny hopeful opening he made, more snow took its place, as if the storm outside was determined to bury him alive. The cold was unbearable now, seeping into his very soul. Outside, the wind roared, a feral sound that echoed through the cavern and made the air thick with cold. Each breath now was a knife to the chest, each inhale burning his lungs. The snow crawled closer, blocking the entrance fully, and began to cover the cave floor inch by painful inch, forcing the hunter back step by painful step.

Henry's mind was reeling. He stumbled further into the cave, away from the encroaching cold, the bones of his legs creaking in protest. The deeper he went, the more the walls seemed to close in on him, the smooth rock pressing down, suffocating. The quiet there was unnerving, an oppressive stillness that made him painfully aware of his own laboured breathing and the pounding of his heart. The silence of the grave. For what felt like an hour, he pushed himself forward against the stone walls, cowering under the stalactites which were now low enough to graze the top of his head. No matter how far he went, the snow followed close behind, blocking the way back. Henry's movements grew slower, more sluggish, until he could no longer outrun it, and that white frost began piling up around his boots. He felt the fight leave him, his breathing weakened, his heartbeat slowed.

Then, from the corner of his eye, he saw it—a single snowflake, delicate and perfect, drifting down from the ceiling above. His breath caught in his throat as he watched it fall, impossibly slow, through solid rock. It glowed faintly in the dim light and Henry’s eyes followed its descent, almost hypnotized, until it landed softly on the ground. On something dark, something that wasn’t stone. He crouched down, his stiff knees cracking in protest, and wiped away the snow, his fingers brushing against a cold, unyielding surface.

A hand.

His hand.

His breath caught in his throat. He was looking at himself, at his own lifeless body, crumpled and broken, half-buried in the snow. The wounds were horrific—deep gashes and punctures that were draining the life out of him-- and the realization hit him like a sledgehammer.

This wasn't real.

The snow, the cold, it was all in his head, growing blurry as his brain ran out of oxygen. And the cavern wasn’t just familiar—it was the place he was dying, right now, in the real world. The place where his body was lying, bleeding out into the cold ground, his blood darkening the stone ground.

For a third time, panic surged through him, but it was laced with a deep, bone-weary exhaustion. The wind howled louder, and now Henry could make out voices, battle cries, screeching and yowling in twisted satisfaction. The snow now poured into the cave through the solid ceiling above, burying everything in its path. He wanted to claw his way out, to escape this nightmare, but his limbs wouldn’t respond. The snow was too thick, too heavy, pressing down on him from all sides. As his vision began to blur, the walls of the cave pulsed, breathing with a life of their own, in tandem with his own slowed breaths. The snow continued to fall, endlessly, burying him, until all he could see was white. And then, from the heart of the storm, he saw a figure—a tall, imposing silhouette that moved with unnatural grace, cutting through the blizzard as if it were nothing. Henry tried to focus, but his mind was slipping, the edges of his consciousness fraying like old cloth.

His final thoughts drifted to Bran. A deep guilt welled up inside him. He wouldn’t make it home for Christmas this year. He wouldn’t see his boy’s face light up when he opened his presents, wouldn’t hear his laughter echoing through the house. Regret gnawed at him, leaving a bitter taste in his mouth. In his last moments, as the darkness closed in, Henry barely registered the sharp pain in his chest—a bite, cold and searing, as if winter itself had latched onto his heart, and his eyes froze over with unshed tears until the world faded and he breathed his last.

In a long-forgotten catacomb in Wales, as the last drop of Henry's blood soaked into the humid ground, something ancient stirred. Beneath the layers of earth and stone, within the crypt that had long been forgotten, a pair of eyes snapped open. After centuries of entombment, something awoke. The blood of the dying hunter seeped into its consciousness, filling it with the remnants of Henry's life, his memories, his regrets. And once the blood had ran dry, the ancient knight rose from his tomb, his eyes burning with a cold, unholy fire.

He tore through the killers, the blood-thirsty beasts who had chased their prey to the ancient tomb, splattering the walls with their undead blood that burnt to ash, until none were left. Then, he looked down at the broken body of the hunter who had unwittingly become his saviour. With a grim sense of purpose, the knight knelt beside Henry’s lifeless form. He whispered words in a dialect long dead, a prayer, perhaps, or a vow. Then, with a reverence reserved for fallen comrades, the knight lifted the hunter’s body and carried him deeper into the crypt, where heroes were once laid to rest, where the knight's own tomb stood, broken apart from within. The hunter was gone, his spirit entwined with the ancient knight’s own, but his legacy would live on, honoured by one of the very creatures he had once sought to destroy.

The knight sealed the tomb with a final, solemn gesture, then left the catacombs behind and stepped out into the warm summer night, into a world which had long outlived him.

[enii]

🐧💕🐧

[humornaut]

hi!! i’m a relatively new omori fan (a brainrotted fan, however, with 140 hours in the game so far… and 98% completion bc i lost to the recyclepath.. -_-) anyway, i love your analysis posts, you’ve clearly studied the details of this game very well!!

i was hoping to ask about the timeline of white space and headspace creation, if you have the time and would like to! my roommate and i played together and have tried to piece it together a few times over the four playthroughs we’ve done (two of each route), but there are still some details that seem contradictory to me. i’m sorry if this is obvious though!

so the transcript of the truth album says “you sink into a crevice in your mind… an empty white room” so i initially assumed white space was created on the day of the incident, in that dissociative state while mari was in the bed. you also see this in the sequence after three days left before going back into headspace where it’s sunny and basil in front of the door, then sunny in white space, then the manifestation of omori. of course, we’ve also been told “you’ve been living here for as long as you can remember”, but we can assume the “you” is omori instead of sunny, which makes sense if he was created in white space

however. in the lost library we see that sunny used to explore headspace during school, presumably before the incident, and daddy longlegs says “in the beginning, there only existed two... the dreamer and his room” and then “the dreamer grew weary of his room and created a door that led to many different worlds”, referring to white space and headspace, so white space existed first. so white space existed before the incident.

so then the white space reference from the truth album is maybe about the manifestation of omori, instead of the creation of white space. i think the outfit sunny’s wearing in the omori cut scene is also the same as from the day of the incident (the black tshirt & shorts). so presumably (before the incident), sunny used to explore headspace as sunny instead of as omori.

daddy longlegs then goes on to talk about black space, and how omori was created to let sunny “ascend to a blissful state of ignorance” and “forget himself” (this also prompts an interesting question of how sentient omori is — because he’s the protector (& knows enough to be willing to kill basil) but he’s also “ignorant of his own fabrication”, according to daddy longlegs, but i guess that’s another matter entirely!) black space was created in response to trauma, so that again supports the idea that omori was manifested after the incident.

so then white space. a place to survive but not to live. the black lightbulb is the repression of an idea, ie, the lightbulb was created after the incident. but sure, white space can exist without the lightbulb. my question then is, why did sunny need a place to survive before then? we could say that dissociation has always been his go-to reaction in stressful situations, and that’s why. but he was also in white space long enough to get bored of it, enough to conjure headspace.

we have a few vague clues that sunny & mari’s home life could have been bad, but nothing concrete. and personally, i’m of the opinion that his life being more or less ideal to begin with enhances the tragedy of the story (as well as him and basil having opposite tragedies, as i saw someone else point out — sunny’s being that he was already very much loved & cared for, so it’s worse when it’s taken away, basil’s that he never had that in the first place), but i guess that’s up to interpretation. other than home life issues then, just the stress of the violin? general developmental issues? depression? something else?

i’d be super curious to hear what you think (again, if you have the time)… thank you! :)

Hi there! Sorry about how long this took me, I've had a lot going on + I actually wrote a whole long response that took me like a week of on and off working, and then I accidentally shut off my computer and lost the whole thing :(

I want to start this off with a couple disclaimers: Omori intentionally keeps its timeline close to its chest (presumably to add to the game's feelings of unease and the mystery of it all) AND we see evidence throughout the game that during Omori's long development cycle, it saw multiple changes to its story that ultimately makes the game's timeline a little inconsistent in a way that doesn't really matter.

I think I don't really have to explain the first point to you, but it will be relevant when talking about Headspace, because the game doesn't even commit to Headspace being purely a dream, as there are plenty of indications throughout it that it could be something a bit more supernatural.

However, I do want to elaborate on my second point there, mostly because this is something that I've wanted to talk about for awhile, and what better time to bring it up than when we are talking about the timeline! So:

How Old is Hero Omori?

I swear this is an actually interesting question

It might seem silly to ask this, considering the game actually tells us how old he is in Headspace, but stick with me.

Based on this line, Hero (and presumably Mari) are 15 pre-canon, while the rest of the group turns 12 during the year of the album (except Kel, who would've turned 12 prior to Basil getting the album).

So let's take the time skip into account. When we first meet real world Aubrey, she says this:

After this point, the game tends to stick to the time skip being four years whenever it comes up. But this isn't technically true! Even accounting for the months after the incident that Sunny continued going outside for, the incident happened in October, while Sunny comes out again during the summer. Most likely, we're actually looking at around 3 and a half years, with Sunny coming back outside the summer that he would turn 16. Since we are presumably at the beginning of the summer, with Hero just now coming home from college, Sunny would actually be 15, at least during the main portion of the game, though once he's in the hospital, it appears some time has passed so that school has now started back up.

Why does this matter? Well, based on this timeline with Hero being 15 in the photo album, he should have turned 19 the January prior to the game's main events, and this is what most people see as canon. However, within the United States, most people, unless they graduate early or late, will leave High School the year they turn 18, meaning most people turn 19 during their first year at college (if they attend).

At first glance, this doesn't seem to be an issue, but we know for a fact that Hero has actually been away at college for two years, due to this interaction:

This is the second summer that Hero has returned from college! He should be 20! Now Hero is a bit of an overachiever, so it is possible that what is actually happening here is that he graduated early, but I doubt that due to what we know about how Hero reacted to Mari's death.

For that first year, even if Hero was technically going to school, he certainly wasn't excelling at it. By the time he gets to the state we see him in-game, he has maybe a year to a year and a half left of schooling. I'm really not sure that I can buy Hero graduating early, regardless of how well he does from that point on.

I also want to acknowledge that the game could simply take place ~4 1/2 years, rather than 3 1/2. There's no reason not to go with this, other than it would mean that the younger four are actually 17 during the game. You are free to believe this instead, but I am going to go into what I actually think is going here next.

We know that the characters got younger during development. We actually have an older version of the photo album, in which instead of saying that Sunny was turning 12, it says 13. Why did this happen?

Let's take a look at Aubrey's recollection of what happened following Mari's death:

For reference, this is part of what she says at the tree stump during One Day Left.

Her words here imply that she wasn't actually aware about how bad it was for Hero, and most of the fandom typically just leaves it at that.

But that's weird, right? Look at what she says. It seems like she did HAVE a reason for why Hero wasn't available, it was just incorrect. And what's more, this is definitely how Hero would've been after his year of very much not studying. There's no reason that Aubrey would believe that Hero reacted to Mari's death in this way unless it was true, especially since it is something that would later be true.

I also want to point out that Kel's talk in the cemetery in which he tells us how Hero reacted to Mari's death is entirely optional and disconnected from the actual main story cutscenes in the real world.

To bring this full circle, I also want to point out a mechanic that was added to the game VERY late in development:

You might see where I'm going with this.

Here's my theory. Originally, Hero would not have reacted to Mari's death with staying in bed for a year in a depressed state. Instead, he would've immediately become lost in his studies as a coping mechanism. However, when the team had the idea for the emotions chart, they likely realized that while happy and angry fit Kel and Aubrey's coping methods respectively quite well, Hero did not seem to fit sadness all that well at all.

In order to make Hero fit sadness, they change his story so that he stayed in a depressed state for a year, but they don't remove his original story of getting lost in his schoolwork. After all, they already had the writing and art assets finished and the game had already been in development for a long time. So instead of doing any major rewrites of the actual script, they simply add a single cutscene in the graveyard that doesn't seem to contradict anything that lets us know that this is how Hero reacted!

Then they had another problem. If Hero spent a year not caring about school, how would he have graduated on time? It would've been difficult even for an overachiever to do two years of schooling in one year. This is an easy fix as well! All you have to do is go through the very few instances of characters' ages being mentioned, and make everyone a year younger! It would've been a lot easier for Hero to catch up and excel if he had an additional year to do so after the incident with Kel! It also gives us another instance of a character getting overwhelmed and angry and pushing someone they care about, which we see multiple times! It works really well, and I like it a lot, but I haven't been able to unsee this change being made ever since the first time I thought of it. The minor line of dialogue about the hero sandwich that reveals Hero has been in college for two years would have been overlooked, since it doesn't mention his age, and likely would've been forgotten due to its unimportance. Aubrey's line, while wrong, can also still be explained away by her simply not being in the know about how Hero really reacted to Mari's death.

I'm not saying this is definitely what happened, but this theory does explain that one tiny little inconsistency that we see in the game. Could also be nothing though idk I'm not perfect

SO

The timeline of the creation of Headspace, White Space, and Black Space! The thing you actually asked about and care about!

It's a little difficult to actually place a lot of things here. Headspace is already so vague. We can use Daddy Longlegs' explanation as a general guide, but it's still difficult to figure out how it lines up with the between night cutscenes, as well as some of the other things.

What I can say is that Omocat has explained Sunny's dream worlds as a very real reaction to trauma that some people have. From this perspective, it would've always existed in some form.

In regards to the truth album line about sinking into the empty room, it's important to keep in mind that nothing there (unless I am super mistaken) implies that this is the first time that Sunny has been there, only that it is happening in that moment. In fact, I find the use of the term "sink" to be very interesting in this context, because very recently prior to the end of the photo album and the incident itself, Sunny had another very traumatic experience when he nearly drowned at the lake. This incident is also very important because many of the traumas that we see from Sunny in game come from this incident. He is still extremely scared of heights, spiders, and drowning by the time the game happens. I don't think it is out of the realm of possibility that White Space was initially created as a response to that, assuming that it didn't already exist for Sunny's entire life.

Next! Headspace, as I understand it, refers specifically to the dream world that Sunny created by merging a bunch of different dream worlds together in order to hide away Black Space, as told by Daddy Longlegs. What we see in the school day memory isn't Sunny exploring Headspace, rather it is just establishing that Sunny has always had a creative and wandering mind, which is why he was able to create Headspace as a coping method in the first place.

The "you've been living here for as long as you can remember" line can also mean many things! It can refer to Omori, as you said, or it could refer to Sunny always having White Space to some extent, OR (and I find this to be the most likely answer) that regardless of how long Sunny has actually had White Space, his repression of ALL his memories both the good and the bad mean that this is literally all he can remember!

All of this is to say: I don't really know. I'm really sorry about that, I've typed this up multiple times trying to come up with a satisfying timeline that I can actually point at evidence for. I believe that Sunny probably had access to White Space before the incident itself, but Headspace probably only became necessary to form out of his different dreamworlds and fantasies after the incident. He was always creative, so he always had creative dreams, but Headspace itself was almost assuredly a post-incident creation.

I apologize that this probably wasn't the answer you were looking for. There might be an answer in there somewhere, but I hope I've shown here how trying to come up with a definitive timeline for Omori can create issues.

[ahundredtimesover]

Hi 👋🏽 I’ll be going on an indefinite break that may (or may not) be for good.

Writing fanfiction was an escape for me these past 2 years. It was a way to express my love for the tannies in how I wrote them as comfort characters, and it was a way for me to make sense of my own experiences and emotions. These fics have always been very personal, with a bit of me in every OC, my pains reflected in their stories, and words I wish someone told me growing up expressed in the dialogues. And I’ll always be so thankful that many of you related with them, found meaning in them, and found comfort in them. That will always be my favorite part 💜💜 stories are so powerful! They’ve allowed me to connect with so many people and make memories in this (mostly) lovely part of the site.

But the process of writing has also been draining, not as cathartic as it used to be, and not as fulfilling. So much as I find myself going back and forth with the numerous stories in my drafts, I can’t bring myself to continue with them. Not anytime soon, at least. Maybe one day the itch to write will be so intense, or JJK1/KTH1 drops and I’ll lose my shit (Untitled and Belong were born out of Indigo and D-day after all), or after rereading my stories, I’ll miss writing so much. The thing is, I’ve never loved BTS as much as I do right now; perhaps I’m content with screaming about that love to myself in the meantime.

I’ll be lurking around here, maybe pop in every once in a while (so plagiarists, keep off my work, pls). My stories will remain here as your comfort 😌 and I’ll do my best to put out the PLM drabbles I promised! Other than that, all the stories are complete for you to enjoy (sorry to those waiting on TLA 😔 I hate that I’m unable to continue). I also have Twitter (jmimi_mi). I’m also just a lurker but say hi if you want! 😊 we can talk bts and fics and whatnot over there (I’ll try, I promise).

Please give love to the authors who are still lovingly putting out work for the community! 🥰