#thank you pbs for making these tapes exist

[bincue]

own all the lain tapes now ^_^

[wheels-of-despair]

The Letter Pairing: Eddie Munson x You Summary: Evil Woman gets a letter in the mail and says it's not a big deal… but to Eddie Munson, it's a very big deal. Contains: A misunderstanding, a dumb boy, a happy ending. Words: 1.4k

Eddie knocks twice, just to announce himself, before letting himself inside your house. "You don't have to knock, Eddie, you basically live here," they'd all told him several times, but he still felt like they deserved a warning.

Her mom has pulled a chair from the kitchen table closer to the phone mounted on the wall. She smiles and waves at him, gesturing for him to go on to the bedroom where his other half is probably getting ready for their favorite kind of date: Markdown Day at Tape World. They'd raid the clearance bin for new cassettes, then stop by the pretzel place for their usual. He'd get something salty, she'd get something sweet, and they'd split both and wash it down with a shared pop. Perfect.

"Yeah, the letter came earlier this week. She's playing it cool, but I think she's excited. She'll fit right in at Penn."

Eddie feels his blood run cold.

Of course the child of two college graduates is going to college. The thought had crossed his mind a few times, but he was always able to distract himself and banish it. But now…

His feet carry him to her bedroom while his brain spirals.

"Hey! Ready in a sec, just let me finish… oh, fuck it." She slams her textbook shut and tosses it from her place on the bed to the backpack by her desk. She rolls her eyes when it misses, then gets up to shove it into her backpack. She may not be getting a basketball scholarship, but of course she's college-bound.

She could have a real life. A future. A career. She could do anything. Hell, she'd taught him things in a week that the teachers of Hawkins High had been trying to beat into him for years. She's a fucking miracle-worker. Why would she stick around a shitty little town like this? For someone like him?

"Priorities," she smirks, wrapping her arms around his neck. She's so fucking beautiful. How is he gonna keep existing when she's not here? "You okay?" she asks, tucking a wayward strand of hair behind his ear. "You look paler than usual."

He closes his eyes and nods. She feels his forehead. If she cared so much, why would she leave him? "You sure?"

"I'm fine. Just tired," he lies. He misses her already. "Ready?"

She kisses the tip of his nose, and he tries not to cry.

"Let's blow this popsicle stand," she grins, grabbing a jacket.

Eddie forces a smile and feels his heart breaking.

*~One Week Later~*

"Switch those two paragraphs around, and I think you're good," you note, passing Eddie his essay back. You're sitting beside him at your kitchen table. Your brother is making a sandwich at the counter. It's the picture of domestic bliss.

"Thanks," Eddie mumbles, sticking the paper back in his English folder.

"We still on for Tape World tonight?" you ask hopefully. Maybe a good deal on some new music would perk him up. God knows he needs it.

"Dunno," Eddie mumbles without looking up, "got a lotta campaign stuff to work on."

"It's Markdown Day," you remind him.

He shrugs and starts gathering his stuff.

"Alright, what's your problem?" You snap the book in front of you shut, making your brother jump instead of Eddie. Oops.

"No problem," he lies, still not looking at you.

"Bullshit. You've been going back and forth between clingy and distant all week. What's your fucking problem, Munson?"

"I don't have a fucking problem," he spits as he starts shoving stuff into his backpack.

"Kay, this was fun, but I've gotta go do literally anything else!" your bother announces loudly as he scampers back to his room with his hastily-made sandwich, leaving his PB&J supplies open on the counter. Like he was raised in a barn.

You wait until you hear his bedroom door slam before you continue your attack on Eddie, who has run out of room in his backpack. (Your lunchbox, Eddie. You shoved your lunchbox in there.)

You put your hand on a folder and slide it toward you, out of his reach. He glares.

"Talk to me."

"I am," he says defiantly.

You consider beating him to death with his math folder.

"Give it," he orders, reaching out a hand for his folder.

You slide it further away from him, daring him to come get it.

"Or don't, I don't fucking care, I'm just gonna fail again anyway." He drops his overstuffed backpack on the floor and stomps toward the door.

"Eddie!" you call in shock. You stand as if you're going to physically stop him from leaving, but your feet don't want to move.

He gets to the kitchen door and puts his hand on the knob, but doesn't turn it.

"When were you planning on telling me about getting into college?"

"What?"

"I heard your mom on the phone, talking about your acceptance letter," he says to the door.

"Oh."

"Oh?" He turns around with an accusatory glare.

"I didn't think it was that big a deal," you shrug. And it wasn't... to you. You knew he was sensitive about the subject. He visibly bristled when anyone mentioned the c-word. You planned on breaking the news to him after graduation. One thing at a time. And right now, getting a high school diploma in Eddie Munson's hand was the only thing that mattered to you.

"Of course you wouldn't think getting into college is that big a deal."

"Eddie, I didn't mean it like that," you say gently.

"I guess moving a few hundred miles away from me isn't that big a deal either."

"What?"

"Don't play dumb, alright? I know you're going to Pennsylvania, where you won't have some dumb loser townie holding you back. Your mom seemed real happy about it."

Pennsylvania? You're going to… you connect the dots, and a laugh escapes you. You clamp your hand over your mouth.

His eyes fill with tears. "Yeah, it's gonna be real fuckin' funny when the love of my life runs off and forgets about me, just like everybody else did as soon as they graduated." This boy is giving you emotional whiplash. He turns around and reaches for the doorknob again.

This time, your feet cooperate. You rush over and wrap your arms around him from behind before he can get the door halfway open, and he tenses. You can feel his sides shaking. He's trying not to cry.

"That's not gonna happen."

"Bullshit." His voice cracks.

"Eddie, that's not gonna happen to us. Look at me."

He takes a shuddering breath and turns around, but keeps his eyes on the ceiling as he tries to blink back tears. You go in for a hug anyway. He resists for a second, but soon gives in and wraps his arms around you.

"I love you," you say into his neck.

Silence.

You thump him on the back. "Say it back."

"I love you, too," he mumbles.

"Do you trust me?"

He pulls back and looks at you with his big wet eyes and nods. You cup his face, kiss him on the tip of his nose, and smile. "Come with me. I gotta show you something."

"What?"

"Just come on," you grin. "Let's go for a little drive."

You scribble a note for your brother, in case he dares to venture out of the safety of his cave before you get back, and lead Eddie to the car.

Nineteen silent minutes later, you pull into a parking lot, find a space, and turn off the engine.

Eddie looks around quizzically at the parked cars, the people rushing by, and the bodies lounging on the grass. Then he looks to you.

"Where are we, Eddie?"

"Isn't this where your mom works?"

"Yeah. But where are we?"

He stares at you blankly. He's lucky he's pretty, because he is so damn dumb. You've never loved anyone more.

"C'mon," you smile, getting out of the car and waiting for him on the sidewalk. He watches you from the passenger's seat for a moment, until curiosity gets the better of him. You wait patiently, then hold out your hand when he approaches. When he takes it, you lead him toward the main building, where your point will be easier to make.

You stop and point at the massive stone sign. "What's that say?"

He huffs out an annoyed breath and reads, "Pennhurst Coll… oh." You see the realization dawn on his face, soon accompanied by a blush. "I'm an idiot."

"You're my idiot," you grin, pulling him close. "And I'm not going anywhere without you."

A Note From Wheels: Honestly can't remember if I've ever mentioned it, but in my mind, Evil Woman's mom has always been a college professor. 😂 EW will be attending Pennhurst because it's cheap (well, free, since Mom's got the hookup) and close to Eddie. 🥰 I'd imagine Pennhurst is not a very prestigious university, so Mom could probably get Eddie in if he wanted to go. (He absolutely does not.)

[inlovewith-icecream]

the gleejack brainrot continues but god rachel and finn give me diane and mr peanutbutter vibesss lmao. damn also brittana kinda alskjfslk just whatever couple i dislike i guess lmao

"Your age of stagnation is when you stop growing. For most people, it's when they get married, settle into a routine. You meet someone who loves you unconditionally and never challenges you or wants you to change, and then you never change."

But yeah like the golden retriever partner that falls into the toxic positivity mindset and or doing these grand gestures that prove they dont actually know their partner at all alkfjslkd at least diane never had a sex tape released thank goddd but mr pb sure af didnt know when to keep personal private things personal and private (their engagement for one)

Gleejack brainrot forever <3 no but seriously though yeah I do see the thing with Mr Peanutbutter/Diane actually, I’d also add “You know sometimes I feel like our marriage is like a magic eye poster…and it’s messy. And at first glance, it doesn’t seem to make any sense. And it’s hard to figure out. But sometimes if you squint at it just right everything lines up and it’s the most perfect, beautiful amazing thing. But, I’m so tired of squinting”

Though as for comparisons…idk, I’d say Brittany and Santana fit the theme much better than Finchel? And this is drearily painful to say as a fan of Finchel hatred (akshajajak) and Brittana but idk they just give off that “toxic positivity let’s pretend it’s all okay” vibe a bit more.

If I were to compare Finchel to anything…I’d say more BoJack vibes? And yeah it’s a much more gloomier(?) dynamic (and ofc as much as I hate Finn I am obviously aware he’s not a BoJack level piece of shit aksdjgksl) but its kind of just. That whole ‘yeah I can be terrible and we are terrible but we’ll ignore it and it’ll be funny and endearing until there’s one day and then it’s not anymore’. (Idk how else to best describe it :/). Overall I’d say BoJack/Wanda is the best comparison; not toxic to the point it’s triggering (ahem BoJack/Gina) but it’s still toxic positivity in a way, and idk I think the “we’re just two lonely people using each other to feel less lonely” is actually kind of applicable here (actually PCJack!finchel something to think about) because she’s ambitious but she gets slushied walking down the hallways / he’s the popular quarterback but that doesn’t mean he knows who he is.

And it’s so funny because; “When you’re looking through rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags.” They both have that thing the other wants (Status/Ambition) and that makes them ‘perfect’ to each other but at the end of the day that’s no foundation for a relationship and perfect to each other doesn’t make them perfect for each other (but also BoWanda also gives off the same Brittana vibes because laugh off the problems and they don’t exist until one day they do and astgjsfshh BH what have you done to me), and most of all “First you didn’t know me, then you fell in love with me, and now you know me.” :/ the incompatibility and idolization issues whyyy

But uhhhh back to Diane/PB (and I guess Brittana) yeah they fall into that “Yeah this isn’t right, and we can’t really see eye to eye on it, but we’re us so it’s okay.” And it’s like. Yes it’s squinting but you’re so used to squinting that, yeah whatever it’s not healthy but it’s what you know and you’re visions being replaced by ruby quartz so the red flags just look like flags and the lilies look like romantic roses. I mean its literally golden retriever x dark haired traumatized gal lmao, but yeah the ‘age of stagnation’ I’d say it applies pretty well, because I’m sure they love each other genuinely but the unconditional love aspect is just…only really beneficial to them at most, and even then it’s detrimental, because sometimes you need a little push as well as the pull, someone who’ll actually keep you in check.

And there actually is still the pushing, yet still not in the right direction, more in the “I know what’s good for you and us so I’ll do it” and…that still relates to the ‘age of stagnation’ thing; you push these boundaries and it’s not okay but it’s what you have done and you continue doing, so what’s the end result if you don’t push each other to or want to change? You continue pushing right past those borders and you don’t even care about reinforcing those boundaries. And over time and time again, you keep having conversations then keep doing things, you keep never changing and never being motivated to change, and suddenly one day you may just find yourself incompatible by the end of it.

(Though to be more critical, on whether that dynamic would lead to some sort of implosion like with Mr Peanutbutter and Diane eventually…I actually wouldn’t say so? Dont get me wrong, it’s still. Not a healthy dynamic. But I just kind of think they’re more…settled into it? I mean it’s been like that since they were teens, and it tied them to each other, and especially when you’re younger those roots are hard to dig out and pull free from, especially when you both seem pretty content and accepting of that being your dynamic actually).

Gah, why do all these BoJack asks end up being so long aksjakdhjsksjdjak

[anna-neko]

gonna absolutely be that "old lady shaking her walker, and screaming how olden days were better" for a minute here.....

There is a very specific thing I very much miss, and its the... well... lack of streaming. Scheduled programming! (be it both visual or radio. .... the radio one is whole 'nother rant, fuck ClearChannel/Viacom etc etc)

now don't get me wrong - i freakin luv the ability to watch some ancient b/w telly, carefully pumped pixel by pixel into my phone from the library server at 2:45am....

but its the fact Boring Dystopia today doesn't let you escape algorithms & their endless grey sludge

so like... TV! My set cannot pick up regular airwaves signal w/out additional "digital bunny-ears" or something similar. Most stations have switched to digital signals years ago, this is fact.

Back in the day you could flip on the telly, and have the choice of a few local channels. You got your usual local affiliates: FOX, WB, ABC, UPN, NBC, CBS and of course PBS. plus that one endless shopping network

Even as background noise you'd still end up getting all sorts of good stuff with different ads, local news flashes, whatever sitcom was running would have "on the next..." and you'd be like "heeeey, Friends is still making new episodes? and this channel still shows it?" Might hear about some movie didn't know existed because it was mentioned as scheduled for Saturday 8pm eastern, 7 central in that last ad-break, but the visuals in this tiny clip looked neat so might try to see it.....

what can i do today tho... Lets see, there's the option of a bunch of streaming shit. It requires a quick app d/l (again, don't get me wrong, TUBI and PlutoTV are a+ "thank fuck u exist" kinda things) buuuuut ... you can't just leave it be. Even the ads are somehow ... grey formless sludge. The same 3-5 shitty things that are determined by algorithm, never any variation. No news-teases, no trailers for movies coming to theater/streaming soon.... who'da thought would miss the damn Wendys new breakfast deals or local (local) car dealership promos

but no, with a streaming 'oooh wait, 'app' you gotta either scroll thru the shitty UI menu to pick what you wanna watch specifically... or in case of Pluto chose a channel.... Which will be just One Thing on a loop too (like a channel of nothing but Addams Family. nothing but The Walking Dead franchise. nothing but SailorMoon episodes) If you chose an episode of a show, and put away the remote it will just keep jumpin to next episode of same until it runs out...

.... i miss times of day influencing what was on. The kinda shit running during "primetime", early morning cartoons, early-noon little kids targeted shows, mid-afternoon soaps and bullshit talk shows, vs "middle of the night" The silly station eye-catches (TNT...dun dun dun, we know drama), ads for gushers mixed in with quick weather updates as the channel hopes you'll tune in at 10pm for the News. I miss discovering new (new to me!) shows or movies but flipping a channel. Disney Channel used to air ANCIENT b/w Alice Comedies or those utterly ridiculous 70s bebi Jodie Foster movies at 1am. AMC was full of old movies (pre-70s stuff mostly), TLC stood for "the learning channel", MTV and VH1 were 2 distinct separate entities showing actual ~ try to contain your shock ~ music videos. and if u were hella lucky, you'd glitch into (or it was free preview month) MTV2 which was for the alt rock vids!

_________________ No i don't miss the ancient shit like TV set that had round knobs and the numbers only went to 13. The horrid static noises. I don't miss VCRs (needing to rewind, hoping the tape hasn't demagnetized, or deteriorated frm too much use etc) . Fuck, don't even miss Blockbuster w/ their exceptionally ruined DVDs that wouldn't play past a certain point and them just goin "oh well, sorry...." and doin fuck-all

whoda thought would be missing an actual structure of some sort, running all sorts of diverse shit in pre-programmed blocks on set schedules. There was a human touch, the human element to it

[liron-ao3]

Destiel AU Oneshot

"Are you sure about that?"

Castiel raises his eyebrow in slow motion and Dean chuckles. "Okay, okay. I got it."

He puts the paint roller against the wall in what used to be Charlie's room and rolls the first stripe of green over it between the meticulously taped lines that Castiel made to set the borders of the blocks and lines of colour that will emphasise the features of the room.

"It looks pretty dark," Dean says. "Are you really sure about the hunter green?"

Castiel rolls his eyes. "I didn't spend hours comparing different shades of green while you strolled through the junk yard for Baby's latest spare part to second-guess my choice now that it's on the wall. It will look perfect with the grey bed and Claire's pictures."

Dean smirks and resumes painting the column his boyfriend had told him to put on the wall. "Oh, yeah, that was the hard part," he teases and he can sense Castiel's soft smile behind him as he steps closer and presses a kiss to the nape of his neck.

"You have no idea how many greens exist in your eyes alone, love," Castiel says softly and it's unbelievable how Dean's partner can make him blush even after all these years.

"Sap!" he says to distract from his flustered state.

"You love it," Castiel speaks against his hair and puts his arms around Dean's middle.

"If I make a mistake it's all your fault," Dean chuckles and it vibrates into Castiel's chest, layers itself warmly around his heart.

"Okay," he says and pinches Dean's butt, chuckling about him jolting forward, nearly rolling the brush over the outline of the tape. "I make lunch. Sandwiches okay?"

Dean hums and leans back to place a kiss on Castiel's temple. "Thank you, angel."

Castiel walks out of the room and leaves Dean to his work and his own thoughts. One day more and he'll be a parent. Kind of. It's weird after all these years. He used to be a father to Sammy. But this time, he's an adult with a good job, a steady income, a nice flat, and a lovely man at his side. It's already so much more than he ever imagined to deserve.

And now, Claire. Petulant, smart, tough, infuriating, sweet Claire, who Castiel found dumpster diving behind the Gas-N-Sip. She had been prickly first until he offered her fresh food from the store and allowed her to roll out her sleeping bag in the staff room. As the manager, he had a bit of latitude after all.

It took some time, but she learnt to trust him not to take advantage of her vulnerability. Castiel's own experience with living on the street surely helped. Him being gay, too. It's why she had ended up homeless after all. Her holier-than-thou parents prefered pretending that their lesbian, underaged daughter didn't exist at all over accepting her for who she is.

Dean's painting green stripes on the wall to make a perfectly fine room even better for their camouflage loving, artistic foster daughter. And isn't that the strangest thing?

He takes a brush to paint the narrower lines by hand when Castiel calls him to grab a bite. He cleans his hands on a rag and nods, satisfied with his work.

Dean places a kiss on Castiel's cheek and bumps his shoulder against his when he sits down next to him at the breakfast bar. He bites into his BLT as Castiel enjoys his usual PB&J. They eat in silence, sharing soft smiles now and then. It's probably the calm before the storm, but it's their little piece of heaven.

They both have been through a lot, but they are blessed with having each other, with secure 9 to 5 jobs that pay the bills and leave room for more, for being both sober and loved just the way they are.

Just five years ago, Dean wouldn't have thought this to be possible. The year with Lisa had been the longest he could ever hold on to a relationship, Castiel managed even less. Two seemingly lost causes.

Dean runs the back of his hand over his mouth and takes a gulp of his water before he grabs Castiel's right hand, their matching black rings clinking together as he laces their fingers together. Castiel smiles at him quietly and it reminds him of the one after he came out to him and Castiel in return.

The lines around his partner's eyes are a little deeper now. From all the laughing, Dean is sure. Looking at them flushes the butterflies in his stomach. Dean never thought that he might have this. Not after Lis and Ben. But here he is.

Later, when they peel off the tape after the paint has dried, Dean grabs Castiel and presses him against the wall, kissing him breathless. They chuckle into each other's lips, enjoy their closeness and the feel of their hands in each other's hair.

And then, Castiel pulls him into their bedroom and undresses himself slowly. Dean knows that he does so just for him because Dean enjoys Castiel's body in other ways than Castiel enjoys Dean's. It leaves him breathless in a completely different way that Castiel trusts him to respect his boundaries while he pushes his own.

Castiel is so beautiful in the moonlight flooding through the window, tree shadows from the park framing his body as if he were a wood nymph. He looks ethereal. Dean is overwhelmed by the love pouring through his body, tightening his heart and somehow making it grow two sizes at the same time.

"Marry me," he blurts out.

Castiel turns around reposefully, an amused eyebrow raised as high as it can possibly reach. "We don't have to be married just because we're going to be parents," he states in his usual matter-of-fact way.

"I know. But I really want to."

The corners of Castiel's lips twitch into a fond smile. "Okay," he says, a slight tremble in his voice.

"Okay," Dean repeats and pulls his fiancé into his arms. They kiss for a long moment before they undress and cuddle up under the covers.

"I love you, angel," Dean whispers into Castiel's chest.

"I know," Castiel says and Dean can hear the pride in his laugh when he receives a chuckle in return.

Yes, with this man, he can grow old together.

This oneshot is a timestamp for the series "Chasing cars". You can read it on ao3.

[lucy-268]

Photographs and Memories

A/N: This meets a couple of challenges. First a request from @openheart12​; next, @wackydrabbles​ where the requirement was to use I can't believe you remembered (noted in bold); and finally, @julychoiceschallenge​ run by @samgtt700 where the challenge for July 17 is moon.

A/N 2: I actually did my own moodboard for the first time with some coaching and encouragement from @oofchoices​, so thank you again!

A/N 3: This doesn’t actually fit in with my chronological series as I’m envisioning Charley as an attending and they’ve been together for a while at this point.

A/N 4: I gave Ethan a bit of a backstory here and named his mom Karen. I also gave her an older sister and a niece.

Disclaimer: Most of the characters belong to PB

Series/Pairing: Open Heart  - Ethan x f!MC (Charley Valentine)

Word count: 1514 (oops, but at least it’s under 2,000)

Request is from here

Alan was still on the phone when Charley stepped outside onto the deck. Ethan was stretched out on the Adirondack chaise staring up at the night sky. She settled herself on his lap and curled against him. She could tell that he was still annoyed.

“Looks like a full moon tonight. If I’m remembering my astronomy correctly it’s the Hunter’s Moon.”

Ethan kissed the top of her head, and she could feel him smile. “It’s also the Harvest Moon this year.”

“Showoff,” Charley teased, snuggling closer.

He shifted, wrapping his arms and jacket around her as protection from the cold October night. He nodded his head to the corner of the deck. “See where Jenner is lying? I used to have a telescope set up there. I spent many nights out here looking up at the sky.”

They settled into a comfortable silence, watching the night sky. Finally Charley had to ask. “So, your Aunt Nancy was your mom’s older sister?”

“I can't believe you remembered that! I mentioned it once during your second year. Yes, she was. And we don’t discuss her any more than we do my mother.”

“But-”

“No. Nancy made a decision to not have anything to do with me or my dad when my mom left.”

“You’ve never even met your cousin Lisa? Has your dad?” Charley shivered.

Ethan pushed up, displacing her from his lap. “It’s time to go in. I don’t want to be responsible for you freezing to death.” He called Jenner as they walked to the door. The dog got up and stretched, plodding to the door. “Tonight, please, girl.”

Charley stepped into the kitchen and opened the jar of dog biscuits. Ethan held open the door and Jenner trotted into the kitchen and sat up, waiting for her reward. “Good girl.” The dog took her treat and headed for her cushion by the fireplace.

“We’ll see you tomorrow, Lisa. Thank you for calling.” Alan disconnected the call and turned to Ethan. “She’ll be here around ten to drop the boxes off.”

“Fine.”

“Ethan,” Alan began.

“I said it’s fine, Dad. Lisa has nothing to do with mom leaving and Nancy pretending we didn’t exist. It doesn’t mean I’m going to consider her family or even a friend, but I can be civil for as long as she stays to drop off a box or two. She can even stay for a cup of coffee for all I care.”

——————-

Charley woke alone the next morning and the sheets on Ethan’s side of the bed were cool so he had been up for a while. The blanket at the foot of the bed was messed up so she knew that Jenner had been in with them sometime during the night.

She showered quickly and dressed before heading to the stairs. She crossed the threshold of Ethan’s childhood room, scanning the walls and shelves of his past. On the shelf were all of his high school yearbooks. She went to pull out his senior year when a voice stopped her. “I brought you coffee.” Charley turned to see Ethan leaning against the doorjamb, smirking at her.

“One of the times when we come down here, I’m going to spent at least a day in here going through your past.” Charley took the coffee mug out of his hands and preceded him down the stairs.

“I would be more than happy to let today be that day.”

“I’m sure you would, but we don’t want dad to have to deal with Lisa by himself. It also isn’t fair to Lisa,” Charley reminded him. “Do I smell bacon?”

“You do. There’s also pancakes.” Ethan glared at her as she turned at the bottom step. “Don’t even say it.”

“You are a fabulous cook. You could’ve been a world class chef! How can you not make pancakes?” Charley gave Alan a hug as he turned off the stove. “Good morning, Dad. Why didn’t you teach him how to make pancakes?”

Alan smiled, handing her two plates of pancakes and bacon. “I couldn’t teach him all my secrets; he’d never come home to visit me.” He grabbed a third plate and they sat at his kitchen table.

Jenner padded over, sitting next to Charley resting her chin on Charley’s leg. “Don’t give her bacon,” Ethan warned as Charley handed the dog half a strip.

Afterwards, Charley cleared the table and loaded the dishwasher, listening to Ethan and Alan discuss Lisa and Nancy. “So, you’ve never met Lisa, either, Dad?”

Alan shook his head. “No. The last time I saw Nancy was about a month before your mother left. She was still living in Waterbury and she had just found out she was pregnant with Lisa. After your mother left, I reached out to Nancy and she told me that she didn’t know where Karen was, she wasn’t interested in ever speaking to Karen again, nor did she want anything to do with either of us. That surprised me, because she had always adored you.”

Charley leaned against the counter. “That sounds strange. She never said why?”

Alan thought for a minute. “No, but-“ He was interrupted by the doorbell.

Ethan reached the door first and opened it to a short blonde with ice blue eyes staring up at him.

“Um,” she stammered, looking at him trying to balance the boxes. “I’m looking for Alan Ramsey? Is this the right place?”

Ethan grabbed the boxes out of her hand. “Yes. Come in, please.” He kicked the door shut after she entered.

“I’m Ethan.”

“I thought you were too young to be Alan.”

Alan spoke, “Please, sit and make yourself comfortable. I’m Alan, and that’s Charley, my future daughter-in-law.”

“Oh, you’re engaged? When are you getting married?” Lisa looked from Ethan to Charley. Charley laughed and Ethan looked startled.

“We’ve only really just begun talking about maybe getting married, someday. Alan just thinks we should do it already,” Charley laughed.

As the four visited, Lisa told Alan and Ethan that Nancy would mention them from time to time but said that her mother had always felt Alan wouldn’t want to hear from her again.

Ethan asked, “Did she ever say why she wanted nothing to do with us?”

Lisa thought for a while. “I think she was really angry with Aunt Karen. She said that when grandfather died, Karen wouldn’t help mom plan the funeral. Then, she just disappeared. Mom said that she was so lost when her dad died and then her sister left. I think that mom was just mad at everyone about everything. I think she wanted to reach out and didn’t know if you would talk to her again.”

Alan said he wished he had known; he would have loved meeting Lisa and seeing Nancy again. “After our last conversation I didn’t feel like I should call her. I guess I hoped she had called me.” Alan asked her, “Do you need any help with your mom’s things?”

“No, I don’t. After clearing out her parents’ house, she never really accumulated much stuff, so I don’t have a lot of ‘things’ to deal with. Her stuff was mostly clothes, a bookcase of books, and a few pieces of jewelry. Oh, there is her kitchen.” Lisa laughed. “She loved to cook, so she had a lot. But I don’t have much, so that works well.”

Lisa nodded to the two boxes she brought. “I found these in her bedroom closet with your name and phone number. She left me a note saying she hoped the phone and address were still correct. I didn’t open them, she had them taped.”

“Do you want to see what’s in them?” Alan asked.

Lisa checked her watch. “No, it’s for the two of you. I need to get back to Connecticut and it’s a two-hour drive.” She left with a promise from Alan that she’d keep in touch.

After she left, Alan got a knife to open the boxes. He handed it to Ethan. “Care to open them?”

Sensing he was about to refuse, Charley grabbed the knife and wrapped Ethan’s fingers around the handle. “Open them. Please.”

Glaring at them both, Ethan set one of the boxes on the coffee table and opened the first box. He lifted out a photo album and handed it to Alan who flipped it the pages. “I haven’t seen these photos in years. Karen was always sending her parents pictures of Ethan.” There were three photo albums in total. Alan flipped through the first, Charley looking over his shoulder.

She yanked the book out of his hand. “These are baby Ethan! I – I need these!”

Ethan tried to grab the album out of her arms, but she held tight and clutched it to her chest. “No! I’m keeping this!”

“It’s for Dad,” Ethan began.

Alan interrupted him and grinned at Charley. “She can have them. I already have plenty of baby pictures.”

Charley smiled at Ethan and he gave up, knowing he would not win this round. He leaned over and kissed her. “Whatever you want.”

My tag list:  @oofchoices​ @openheart12​  @jamespotterthefirst​  @aylamreads​  @catchinglikekerosene  @choicesficwriterscreations​ @ohchoices​​

[missblissy]

Rebirth (Chapter Five)

Alastor X Human!Reader ((Reincarnation!AU)) 

Prologue || One || Two || Three || Four || Five

Tagged: ((You can ask to be added to the tagged list!!)) @alastors-bambi @peachesandkats​ @riintss @destiny-in-the-universe​ @dadzawas-eyebags @daedaliaaan @putridjoy @shieldagentofthemonth @originofthedragonjim @animals4ever527 @jexinqq @chaotic-pansexual @geekin-about-alastor @keenhumanoidduckeagle @fafefae @honeydrops01010 @itz-kira @xoceanicgemzx @the-monochrome-jester @holdnyvaseline @temmieboi04 @ultimately-purrrfect @lukatherat 

You could still smell the herbs from a few days ago. You were in your kitchen making yourself something to eat. It had been almost two days and there wasn’t a single sign of Alastor or Eon. Your mind was busy with other thoughts anyways. Your father’s surgery went well and he was on a slow recovery. Hopefully, it helped with his condition, but you doubt it would slow down his one-way ticket to the grave. You took a small bite of the PB&J that you made and suddenly you didn’t feel so hungry anymore. 

Instead, you wanted to break down and cry. You leaned on your counter, looking down at the sandwich as tears began to well in your eyes. So much shit has happened these past few days. You moved and now lived by yourself for the first time in your life, you were going to college at the same time while looking for a new job, and demon decided it was going to drop an entire shit load of problems that didn’t even involve you. Just your soul. And on top of that, your father was dying. It broke your heart when you waited with your mother for him to get out of surgery. Your father was a strong and proud man and to see him wither away into a husk, a shadow of what he used to be... It was all too much. You couldn’t take it anymore.

The sobs came quickly. You crouched on the floor behind the counter and held your knees as you cried away. You felt as though the entire world was against you. You were thankful for the few people you had. 

You didn’t want to feel bad anymore so you did your best to dry your tears. As you stood back up you saw something on your counter that wasn’t there before, “Huh?” Next to your pathetic sandwich now laid a thick leather-bound book with a sticky note taped to the cover. You were ready to roll your eyes and dumb the book into the trash, you already knew it was from Alastor.

That’s when you felt the hairs on the back of your neck start to rise while a familiar dry static energy began to fester within your home, “Go away!” You yelled, “I’m not your wife! I don’t know you! And you don’t know me!” You were talking to the air, but you knew Alastor was here. You could feel his energy. You could even feel his eyes on you, even if he wouldn’t show himself and choose to hide, “Just because you could guess my favorite food and color doesn’t mean I’m still your wife! So what if we have similar taste in stuff! I’m not her! You don’t know anything about me. You don’t know my family, my friends, you don’t even know my birthday! You can’t name a single thing about me other than what you can guess off the top of your head!”

You wanted to cry again and when a tear dripped down your cheek, you tell he was gone. The static fizzled away into still air and the feeling of eyes on your vanished as well. The book was still there though. You kept telling yourself to just throw it out but another part of you wanted to see just what kind of gift Alastor had left you.

You sniffled and ran the back of your hand over your eyes to clean away the tears. You pulled the book into view and read the note. At first you couldn’t believe it, but... Alastor had very... very... pretty handwriting. It was perfect and drawn with pen and ink well. 

The note said: 

        I think I went about this all wrong, (Y/n). I should have given this to you in the beginning. I’m sincerely sorry. This used to belong to your former self. It’s your diary. To unlock it, you must use your blood. Just a pinprick should work. I hope this helps and answers the questions you’ve been looking for.

       - A   :) 

Was this for real? And he had to just add the smiley face? Ugh... You rolled your eyes and looked over the book. It didn’t even have a lock on it, so why the hell was he talking about using your blood?  When you opened up the book, you couldn’t believe your eyes. Every page was yellow and blank. Nothing was in the damn book! Was he just playing a sick joke on you?

There was only one way to find out. You flipped deep within the book and towards the middle. You took a kitchen knife from your silverware drawer. You cringed in pain as you pricked the tip of your finger and watched the blood pitter-patter onto the pages. Nothing happened at first and you were ready to burn the book and get some more herbs to make sure Alastor didn’t come back.

But after a minute or so your blood soaked into the page and words began to appear. The looked like they were written in gold. The ink was metallic and shiny. You brushed a finger over the words and felt the little rise and fall of the ink and space between each letter. It took a second for the page to fill with words. Okay... maybe he wasn’t lying and this was your past self’s diary. You went ahead and began reading the passage you had randomly opened up too. 

1939, December 29th:

     This castle I call my home is nothing but chains holding me down. I have spent the last... some 2,000 years at this post. I didn’t know that serving as the Gatekeeper of Hell was a “forever” kind of deal. I guess that's what you get for letting Lucifer be your boss. I wish every day that I could leave this castle. But soon again I will! The seventh year of my new sentence is coming up and I will be free to roam for another 365 days. Then for the next 6 years, I will be trapped in this castle again. 

     At least I have Alastor. This empty castle isn’t so empty with him around. He fills the hallways with songs and music, with smells of food I never knew existed. He makes me laugh, something I haven’t done in a long time. He makes me smile and when I cry he doesn’t run in fear like everyone else in my afterlife. 

     It’s been six years since I made that life-changing deal with an even bigger Devil than Lucifer. It’s been six years since Alastor manifested at the gates of Hell and offered me the salvation and freedom I craved. No, he wasn’t the deal maker. The spirit that was attached to his soul was. Eon. I sold what was left of my soul to him just so I could see the world again. 

     In just a few days I’ll be able to walk out of this castle and go where ever I want again. The first thing I’m doing is marry Alastor at the top of a pile of corpses that belong to every enemy I’ve ever made. I can’t wait to taste the blood and tears of them all. I will kill all of those fools who dared to call me a cry baby, to call me weak, to say my emotions meant nothing. Every time I shed a tear I turn into a monster and monster is what they will see. I will rip their heads from their necks. I will take their hearts and squeeze every drop of blood until there is nothing left. And I will do this with Alastor by my side, cheering me on as I finally get the justice and revenge I’ve so deserved.  

The words started to fade slowly and disappear again. You couldn’t believe what you were looking at. Once the passage was finally gone and the pages were blank again... You slammed the book closed. This was a dangerous thing. A tempting thing. 

It called to you like a song in the night. You could feel your entire soul reach out and try and open the book back up and read every word. Something about this book filled you with fear, curiosity and something else you couldn’t quite put together.

After several moments of fighting with your own thoughts, you decided that you’d read some more. You flipped the book back open. You choose a spot very close to the end and pricked your finger again. The blood splashed onto the page and soaked in much quicker than last time.

1996, February 4th: 

     Today I laid waste to another sector of Hell. When I came to my castle home, Alastor was waiting for me. I know I write about him to much, but he is everything that matters to me. This entire book could easily be mistaken for a stalker. Good thing I cursed it to never open for anyone, not even Alastor. I love him, but even I must keep my secrets too. That and I don’t want him to know how much I obsess over him. 

     For starters, it’s our anniversary. He always tells me, “I never wanted to get married! I never thought I would! Marriage was a waste of time in my opinion -Blah Blah Blah-” Same old stuff, then he’d leap into some musical number about how I changed that and how much he loves me and how happy he is to call me his wife. 56 years later and he’s still the same dork he’s always been. Sure, he likes to act tough, mean, scary and evil, but deep down inside that psychopath... is another even bigger and weirder psychopath. But that’s what I love about him. He’s such a strange creature. But I love him. 

     I love that stupid little tail of his that wags when he sees me or how he’d flip his tail all the way up as he danced around the room. I love that he chooses to sleep just because it’s a pastime I enjoy. Though he’ll always remind me, “You know, we don’t have to sleep, right?” Yeah, but I still liked to cling on to my humanity. And most of all... I love when he cries with me. It’s so hard for me to fight my black tears and to not let them stain my face. For so long, I never saw an emotion escape him. He even thought it was weak of me to be so emotional and we got into many arguments about it. However, he saw that it was just my nature to be like this. Now that we’ve spent 5 decades together, he shares all my emotions. The high and especially the lows. He’ll weep, shed tears, and tell me it’s okay. He’d kiss every single black tear away even when I turned into a monster... I have to remember though, I don’t turn into a monster. It’s just my natural demonic form that I suppress and hide and hold back. Alastor says he loves it more than the my... human look I take on. Maybe one day I’ll be strong enough to love myself the way he loves me. 

     I know... I know... I need to shut up about this man. But I can’t. He’s a person deep down inside. A messed up one, but still a person. He knows my pain, he’s seen my struggles. His life wasn’t much different from mine. We were both... innocent for so long until a darkness we couldn’t control grew from our pain and suffering. We joke about how we’d have gone to Heaven if only things were different... Is it bad for me to wish they were sometimes? What if we met when we were alive and still human? Would he still have become a cannibal? Would I still have committed suicide? If only we could have been there for each other sooner rather than later... 

The words started to fade again just as you had finished the passage. This book... It was going to answer a lot of questions. You felt an unknown connection to it. You slowly closed the book, deciding that for you’d put it away for now. You weren’t going to throw it away either. 

Something about the way your past self wrote about Alastor, about how much she loved him, it slowly changed your opinion of him. It got you thinking about how Alastor must have felt to have lost you. He spent 22 years searching for you, looking all over the planet and heaven above just so he could be with you again. It was romantic in a twisted way. You still couldn’t bring yourself to feel much for the demon other than anguish and pity. You felt sorry for him because you were not the same person. And you were beginning to learn that, yes, there were many things similar about you and your past self, such as your name and your looks, but you never had the same struggles.

You walked over to your bookshelf and squeezed the large leather book into a spot that barely fit. You had to get to your classes soon. You really didn’t have the energy to do anything and you were incredibly depressed. Your heart thumped loudly in your chest as you looked at the spine of the diary. You wanted to reach out and grab and keep reading and the thought of leaving it at home oddly upset you more. You knew you couldn’t bring it with you though. Not many people would be too pleased to see some girl cutting her finger dozens of times to read some magical book. You’d probably get thrown in some kind of crazy house. 

So, with a sigh, you tore yourself away from the book’s gaze and grabbed your bag. As you got to the door, you took one look back at the book. You stood there for a second longer than you should have then turned and gone out the door. 

_______________________________________________

 1933, March 3rd: 

     I couldn’t believe it. He’s here. I never thought he’d make it here but he is and he’s wandering around the castle. Alastor had finally died. He didn’t even wander through purgatory. He manifested before my eyes just in front of the gates. 

     I already love him but I will not say that allowed or anywhere else in this book. I can’t help but love him because he is letting me make a deal with the deadliest deal maker to have ever wandered to this side of the planet. 

     Eon. A spirit not even from this world, universe or dimension. He’s from a world so distant and far from this one that we know very little about him, other than that people wall him The World Destroyer. Apparently, it’s Eon’s goal to consume every soul in every universe and dimension. Lucifer warned me that making a deal with this creature would end in horrible ways. It didn’t seem that it ended that bad for Alastor, seeing as he was the one who summoned Eon here and sold his soul for the chance at unlimited power in the afterlife. 

     None of that matters now. I’ve made up my mind. I want to leave this castle and I want the ability to control my afterlife and what happens to me. I must go, Alastor is waiting for me and I can not wait to leave this castle wage war against all of those fools who laughed at me, all over those Overlords who think they're better than me. Alastor just wants to kill and feed souls to Eon, he wants to create chaos and topple over those in power so he can make his mark among the legends.

     I want revenge. 

Your eyes were heavy, they even had little dark bags under them. You had spent the last three hours reading the diary. Your finger was a dark purple color and you felt light-headed. You sat in your living room at the edge of your couch.

Almost two weeks have passed now since Alastor disappeared and left you this book. There was nothing coming from him. Normally you could tell when he was hiding somewhere in a dark corner or in the shadows. You’d feel his static energy wave off him, but there was none of that. Nothing. Not a single haunting. Had he finally given up? You weren’t sure. You didn’t think so. You cleansed your home but Vanderlinde said that you’d have to do it every couple of days, which of course you didn’t. You completely forgot to do that the second Alastor left the book for you. 

The book, however, was everything you may have asked for. You learned how Alastor had given everything to your past self. He loved you more than anything and you wrote about that often. He grew a rose garden around the castle your past self was trapped in every six years just so you’d smile. He murdered and tortured those who wronged you. He’d cook all of your favorite foods, even if they were mostly sugary pastries and candies, which you found out he hated. You learned so much about Alastor. He loved cooking, singing, dancing, making people smile and entertaining others to the point of laughter. He drank coffee every morning with you on a balcony overlooking the little empty Kingdom the two of you shared. He’d stand from the tallest tower and sing love songs to you while you worked at the Gates of Hell. He taught you to play the piano, how to better defeat your enemies, how to use Voodoo magic against the living and even the dead, he shared stories of his life and family and home, his dreams that never came true and his hopes that all but died until he met you.

You quickly learned that not every passage in the diary would show itself to you. You covered several pages with your blood but nothing ever happened. The only passages that would reveal themselves were the ones that mentioned Alastor. You weren't sure this was his doing or not because the book said that even Alastor couldn’t open it. 

You were very dazed and confused, you lost a lot of blood in this process. One more passage, you told yourself, then I’ll stop. Suddenly there was a knock at your door. You almost jumped out of your skin, “It’s open,” you called, knowing exactly who it already was. 

Sage kicked open the door and rushed in, “Where is he!?” She yelled as her eyes darted around the room, “Where is that talk show shit lord!?” She just got back from the hunt she was on. She texted you this morning that she’d be over as soon as possible

Maybe it was the lack of blood or the massive wave of depression that’s been with you for the last two weeks, but you couldn’t bother to get up from the couch. You just closed the heavy book and muttered, “He’s not here anymore,” Why did you sound so defeated when you said that?

Sage was a little stunned by your state, “Are you okay?” She closed the door behind her and came to sit next to you on the couch. She was your best friend, more so than you were with Vanderlinde. However, you felt some kind of betrayal that she never told you about this huge secret part of her life. Ya know, the whole demon hunter slash witch thing? Yeah, that kind of upset you. 

“I’m fine. Just... a lot is going on right now,” You confessed, “Not so much the demon haunting my house thing. Alastor hasn’t shown up since Van and I cleansed this place. It’s more so... just life and shit,” It wasn’t a total lie. You were stressed about your father and still not having a job. Your bank account was starting to get dangerously low. 

That’s when Sage noticed the book in your lap. She pointed to it, asking, “What’s that?” 

“Just a diary I’ve been keeping,” Again, not a total lie, “Nothing cool,” 

She didn’t say anything for a second and you wondered if she knew you were trying to cover up something. Eventually, Sage just shrugged and said, “Okay, well, I brought some stuff that might help you out if that dumb ass shows his stupid face again,” Sage took the backpack off her shoulders and set it down next to your feet, “There’s even a little guide book in there that I made for you. Basic magic stuff that anyone can do. Rituals, cleansings, crystals, herbs, blessed water, and bones. Pretty much everything you’ll need,” 

“Thanks,” You mumbled as you pulled the bag closer to you. You didn’t think you’d need any of that stuff seeing as Alastor kind of gave up on bothering you. The first sign of a fight and he turns tail. From what the diary told you- that was very out of character for him. You had a feeling he’d be back but you weren’t sure when or for what, “Hey- actually, I have question,” You peered at your friend. There was something bubbling in your mind that you had been wondering about. You knew the internet wouldn’t have this answer so maybe your friend did. 

She gave a small smile and said, “Okay, shoot,” She seemed more than happy to help. 

“Um... Would you actually know how to... summon a demon?”

[becuzpurple]

NUMB

(this is a re-posting of an old story I started almost 2 years ago, but never completed. This is the introduction, and I have 2 more chapters to repost within the next few days. I’ve just started continuing to write the story, so, in hopes that I follow through, I’m reposting the existing parts now. I hope you enjoy this, and please shower me with positive comments and likes, because that will definitely encourage me to keep writing, lol!)

Samantha Jean Kinney needed to start over in a big way.  She’d been in a bit of a rut, just going through the motions of everyday life, feeling slightly...dissatisfied but unable to put her finger on why, exactly.  After an unexpected blow to her personal life, she decided it was the perfect time for a much-needed fresh start.

Life is weird.  Bad things happen.  Wonderful things happen.  Do we control these things, or is it fate?  Maybe it’s both, or maybe it’s neither.  In any case, I don’t want to let life just pass me by any more.  I want to take it by the horns and enjoy the hell out of it...to be kind, be generous, and make the most of what I have.

I want to really live, rather than just exist.

---

INTRODUCTION - No Returns

November

I was in shock.  How could I have been so wrong? I loved him so much, and I believed he loved me right back.  How could I have not seen this coming?  How could he have done this to us?  

I thought Brandon had been under pressure because of work.  I knew things were really busy at the law firm, and his client-load was heavy.  For the past several months he’d been working long hours and not getting enough sleep.  But I understood.  I was supportive.  If he needed time to unwind or be with friends, I encouraged it. On the flip side, if he needed my shoulder for emotional support or my body for physical comfort, they were his.  I was there for him, damnit.

Not that I was his doormat.  I had my own life, too, and I didn’t put it aside for him.  But I thought we were sharing, blending our lives.  I thought we’d eventually get married.  We lived together for almost 2 years, for god’s sake.

So when I returned home from a long Thanksgiving weekend visiting my parents (he said he couldn’t come because of work) to find our apartment virtually wiped clean of his existence...calling it a complete shock would have been an understatement.  He’d taken the majority of the furniture and all of the electronics. He left me the older sofa, the bedroom set, most of the kitchen supplies, and the cat.  My own personal belongings were untouched, thank goodness.  

He left a note taped to the refrigerator door spelling out his reasons.  As far as I could tell, it was mostly lies, exaggerations, and ridiculous accusations used to justify his actions.

“There’s no point in maintaining a relationship that brings no returns…”

“I’m sure you’ve been with other men…”

“We don’t have the same interests or goals anymore…”

“I hate your fucking cat…”

No person is perfect and no relationship is perfect - we’re all works in progress.  I’d always put effort into Brandon’s and my relationship - it was a priority to me.  So, I was baffled as to why the first I’d heard any of this was literally AFTER he left. I guess I really wasn’t as important to him as he was to me.  He pretty much came right out and said it, didn’t he?

I never cheated on him, nor even considered it.  So, naturally, his accusation led me to wonder if he’d been cheating, and if he was deflecting his own actions onto me.

I wondered exactly what his goals in life were, and when and why I stopped fitting into them.  Or if I ever did, for that matter.

And my cat?  Really?

I sat down hard on the sofa - the sole piece of furniture left in the living room, and considered crying.  But I couldn’t summon tears - yet.  PB appeared and wrapped himself around my legs once before jumping up on my lap.  At least I had something living and breathing to hold on to, even if it was only my somewhat apathetic cat.

I wasn’t sure what to do.  Part of me wanted to call him and demand he tell me what the actual fuck was up his ass.  I wanted to defend myself and refute his ridiculous claims.  Yet I didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing I was so gutted.  

I didn’t call.

I was too numb to do anything, to be honest.  I sat there for a long while, trying to wrap my head around everything, but all I felt was shock.  It hadn’t sunk in, despite the evidence all around me.  I knew he’d been unhappy lately, but I never imagined it had anything to do with me.  I thought it was a temporary, work-related thing, and that he’d eventually work through it.  And he let me think that while he was planning this.

Fucker.

Eventually I got up, scrubbed my face, pulled my hair back into a messy, loose ponytail, and changed into my most comfy flannel pajamas. Ambling into to the kitchen, I wondered if he left me anything in the refrigerator, and was relieved to find a bowl of leftover pasta.  I warmed it in the microwave and opened a bottle of red wine.  I didn’t bother with a glass.

I could do worse than wine and pasta, right?  It’s comfort food.  

I thought I’d sit and watch something on TV while I ate - something that would make me laugh, because god knows I could use it.  But then I remembered that he took the TV and all the TV equipment.

Double-fucker!  It’s fine, though.  I have my laptop and Netflix.

But the goddamn twatweasel took the router, too.

And that’s when the tears finally came.

(NEXT CHAPTER)

---

A/N:  Notes and likes and reblogs and comments are welcome and wanted!  I need your feedback, please!

[spideycents]

B-Roll // Shawn Mendes - 4: rolling

---

TABLE OF CONTENTS

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trigger warning: sexual harassment

---

"Maybe I'll just see you guys at lunch," Shawn suggests as we're climbing out of the van. It's stopped on the street outside a massive high school gym.

"Yeah maybe," I shrug. "Depends on how busy things get."

"I won't be busy," Michael chimes in. "I'll probably be on my third plate of pasta."

"Unless it's chicken," I laugh lightly.

"If it's chicken, then I'll eat salad," Michael says flatly.

Shawn's looking back and forth between the two of us. "Chicken's bad, eh?"

"Very," I say simply before Michael can go off on his long rant that I've heard a billion times.

"Man, guess I won't eat chicken today then," Shawn laughs lightly.

"Oh no," Michael cuts him off. "It's not your chicken. Crew food is always super bougie and delicious and amazing and sometimes you guys have lobster and chocolate fountains and basically crack. It's the extras food that's dogshit. It's like school mystery meat."

"Someone probably ran over the extra's chicken on their way to set," I add. "A month ago."

Shawn grimaces. "Crazy."

We nod.

"It's the worst," Michael continues. "Always has been. Always will be."

"I don't know," I shrug. "I think I've accepted it and kinda like it now."

"Well then we'll trade today," Michael says. "You can eat extras catering while I get crew."

I cringe. "I think I'll just bring you a brownie and we'll call it square."

Shawn chokes back a laugh and I look at him.

"Cause brownies are usually square," he smiles.

I roll my eyes, but a hint of a laugh sneaks it's way onto my face.

I'm about to say something really stupid about puns, but I'm saved by someone yelling for Shawn over by the gym.

We all look over and see the guy who was with Shawn in the parking lot this morning. He's waving him over. I can see base-camp across a practice field by the gym, so Shawn's trailer must be over there.

"Well," he turns back to us. "That's my cue."

"It was nice meeting you," I smile at him and hold out my right hand. He takes it in his. His handshake is strong, but it doesn't hurt. It's just...secure.

"Yeah, you too," he smiles back.

"See ya around," Michael nods at him.

"Let me know if ya get the bad chicken and maybe I'll bring you a burger, man." Shawn tells him.

Michael laughs lightly. "You got it."

"Break a leg," I tell him.

"Thank you," he smiles again and turns away. "See ya."

"See ya," I say softly as he turns away and heads over to his friend.

"Fuck, it's cold!" Michael exclaims, already walking quickly toward the gym doors. Blue signs taped to orange cones have arrows printed on them that say Extras Holding is that way.

We drop our things at our usual spot in holding.

Michael collapses into a folding chair. He pulls a hoodie out of his bag and bundles it up then sets it on the table in front of him.

I raise my eyebrows at him. "Nap time already?"

He nods.

"Are we not gonna talk about what just happened?"

He shakes his head.

"But-"

"Shhh." He folds his arms under the hoodie and buries his face in the fabric.

I roll my eyes and look around the gym. There are tables set up for breakfast, but nothing's been put out yet. There's a bright orange water cooler on a table against the wall by the door where we came in, but that's about it. No one's come by to set out boxes of fruit and granola bars and gummies yet. I'd kill for a PB&J station right now.

My stomach's actually starting to hurt, I'm so hungry. I should've grabbed something from home. Michael managed to down an iced coffee before we left, that'll honestly hold him until lunch. All I got was my water bottle.

If I don't have real food in five minutes, my inner Hulk might be unleashed.

Maybe crew crafty's been set up by now. I won't get in trouble if I ransack the cart. I have email proof that I'm part of this movie.

God, they need something more solid and tangible, like ID badges or something. Walkie-talkies with our names sharpie'd onto a piece of tape is so half-assed. I don't think I get one of those anyway.

I wonder where crew crafty is...

Close to set? Maybe? Probably?

I don't know.

Should I ask someone?

Can I ask someone?

I look like a fucking child. No one is gonna believe I'm crew. That PA definitely didn't.

Maybe I should pull up that email and have it ready to flash to anyone who questions me.

I wander out of the gym, into a big open hallway. The makeshift signs taped to the walls have arrows pointing toward holding, set, catering, base camp, and the bathrooms.

Thankfully, those are right by the gym. I make a mental note of the location of the women's room and head outside, toward catering and base camp.

There are no real parking lots at this school, which explains why we parked at a gravel lot behind some church a few blocks away. The only parking spots line three of the four streets surrounding the school. This part of the city is a grid system, which should mean we're downtown and near a parking garage or two, but we're basically in the suburbs. Like the old suburbs. The houses around the school are all one story, maybe two, not big at all and look like they were built in the 60s or 70s. Which they probably were.

I leave the school through a row of three sets of glass doors. I walk through the middle set and push both doors open in a grand double door exit because I'm extra like that.

I head for the large practice field behind the school and make a bee-line for base camp.

I wonder if Shawn's made it to his trailer yet.

Since they can't park any trailers on the grass field, they're all in a gravel lot in the corner farthest from me. Except for all the semis full of costumes and the makeup trailers that flood out onto the street. As I trudge across the field, which is slightly muddy since it's been raining a lot this summer, I notice another parking lot behind the gym. I see steam rising from a small village of tents, which can only mean one thing.

My pace goes from tired trudging to Usain Bolt Olympic sprinting in three seconds flat.

I lurch to a stop when I reach catering. I'm panting, but I can't tell if that's from the running or my hunger or both. The cooks are in a frenzy, getting stuff ready for breakfast. Everything smells so amazing that my mouth waters. I'm about to dive my face into a griddle covered in bacon when another smell catches my nose.

Nicotine.

Oh god, it's foul and unpleasant and completely ruins my appetite, so now I'm really pissed off.

There's a small group of smokers huddled around a loading dock that's just past catering. I'm so annoyed that they're standing so close to the food. They're gonna make their awful smells seep into the food. I swear, if I eat pancakes that taste vaguely of cigarettes, I will shove their lighters up their butts.

No pun intended.

There's a door that goes back into the gym, but to get to it, I have to pass the smokers.

I get some weird looks from the caterers while I quickly make myself a cup of coffee and grab some eggs, bacon, and toast, but no one comes up to me and yells at me or demands proof that I'm really crew.

I try to hold my breath while I walk past the smokers, but my lungs haven't been under this much pressure since middle school cross country.

I hate this.

The smell's going to cling to my clothes.

This sucks so much.

I hate nothing more than this god awful, putrid stench.

I try to take in long deep breaths in the clean air that still smells and, oh god, kind of tastes like bacon. Fucking shit. I'm so fucking hungry!

I don't want to make it too obvious that I'm holding my breath or speed walking, but I want to get by the smokers as quickly as humanly possible without full on running.

"Lyla!"

Oh god. Oh please no.

"Hey! Lyla!"

I look over at the group and waving back at me is Jake, the literal bane of my existence.

Fuck him.

"Hi Jake," I call back and walk over to him, but still keep a wide berth between us.

Take note of the space I'm not closing. Let this conversation end before it even begins.

He smirks at me and I notice his gaze fall down my legs and back up my body for an agonizing second, then he looks back at my eyes. "How you been?" he nods.

Really?!

A slight shiver makes me turn my neck and raise my shoulder slightly to force it down.

I hate this.

I hate him.

Rot in hell.

"I'm great," I say, faking enthusiasm. "How are you?"

"I'm good," he nods again, but it's more like a bro nod rather than a flirt nod. "Living the dream."

I choke back the feeling of something rising in my throat.

God, I forgot how much he says that. I hate that stupid phrase.

I laugh lightly, but it's in that moment that I realize everyone else in the smoker's group has stopped talking. They're watching us.

They're quietly taking long, slow drags, the soft glow briefly illuminating their faces. They're shrouded in shadow until the light catches their eyes and I know they're looking at me. I don't want an audience. I didn't sign up for this.

The stench of the smoke is still so foul and it's taking every ounce of self-control I have to not scrunch up my nose or cover my face with my hand or my shirt.

"What are you booked as?"

Why is he still talking to me? For once, I want him to be the douchebag that he is so I can go inside and get the hell away from him.

I don't understand. Usually, after we've exchanged the pleasantries, he looks bored and it's clear he's lost interest in me, but he's still looking at me intently. I don't think his eyes have left me once.

I feel a flush rise in my cheeks.

I don't want to deal with this right now. Especial not here, exposed and self-conscious. We're not doing this right now

"I'm not an extra."

Stop responding, Lyla. Walk away. Go inside.

His eyebrows raise in surprise and I have to fight the impulse to roll my eyes so hard, it gives me a headache.

"I'm a makeup assistant," I add.

"Oh, really? That's awesome!" Gotta love his fake excitement. "I'll be sure to come to your chair then."

He winks at me.

I'm gonna kill him.

He's not hot enough to get away with this shit. He may have nice eyes and he's tall and in moderate shape, but he's got a weird face, receding hairline, protruding jaw, and disgusting beard that's somehow always greasy.

He's garbage and I'm done with him. Really done.

"If it's open," I say curtly then I turn on my heel and walk back into the gym.

---

I couldn't sleep when I wrote this so if it’s awful, blame global warming.

[paranoidsbible]

The Paranoid’s Bible 2.0

===The Paranoid's Bible=== Non-Profit and Free for Redistribution. Written on June 04th | 2014 Published on October 22nd | 2015 Runner Edition Written on April 11th | 2017 Runner Edition Published on April 30th | 2017   For entertainment and research purposes only

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===DISCLAIMER=== The Paranoid's Bible and its writers hold no responsibility for the acts of others. The Paranoid’s Bible is for research and entertainment purposes only. **Reminder**: Links have been forced to HTTPS. If a link doesn’t work, try removing the ‘S’ in ‘HTTPS’. Please visit our blog for more guides and information: https://www.paranoidsbible.tumblr.com/ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===Preface=== The Paranoid’s Bible project is a series of guides meant to help the average internet user learn the rudimentary knowledge needed to prevent dox attempts and lessen their digital footprint through the use of information security (INFOSEC). Through this and other guides, the average user should be able to have not only a safer and more secure internet experience but also a more private one. This guide and many others by the PB team have been partially written by several individuals who’ve done this not for personal gain but just to share the knowledge. So, please, pass on the knowledge you’ve gained from this guide. Splice it, edit it, consume or repurpose it. It’ll always be free, like any information should be. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===All About Doxing=== Doxing, a term that comes from ‘document tracing,’ is believed to have had a past in web 1.0 among the early internet users. The act in itself is the action of finding information on a target from an initial set of data, like a username or an e-mail address. This information can be found through the use of something as simple as a search engine or as time consuming as reading up on the target’s accounts across the internet. While there exists several services besides search engines to find this information, the most tried and true method is simply using the target’s own actions against them to discover their dox. It isn’t all about search engines and researching a target’s digital footprint, some individuals can and will try their hand at social engineering. The act of social engineering is accomplished through the claim of being someone they're not or through asking questions in order to gain access to more information on the target. While a gray area of being online and offline, it’s best to note that doxing isn’t only done online but also offline (E.G: posting fliers to ‘name & shame’) and that there exists numerous ways to obtain the information needed.  The act of doxing, though, is a neutral act that is free of political and moral responsibilities. Anyone can find another person’s dox and use it for whatever means they wish to use it for, like blackmailing, shaming or simply browbeating someone over different beliefs and opinions. It’s used by many groups and individuals that range in religious and political beliefs; ergo the person committing the act is the one that places any meaning onto it. The truth is that no one is un-dox-able. It’s speculated this is the end result of mob justice and social justice on the internet; however doxing is just something that won't go away. Just like its rise to infamy in the early 2000s, it'll always have its ups and downs. We just have to learn to co-exist with it and guard ourselves against any attempts. **Remember**: Anyone can become a target and victim of doxing. ___References___: https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/what-is-doxing-and-how-does-it-affect-your-privacy-makeuseof-explains/ https://www.techgyd.com/know-doxing-protect-yourself/6197/ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doxing https://socialengineering.wikia.com/wiki/Doxxing https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/doxing https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=doxing ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===Why You Should Fear Doxing=== Many would have you believe that doxing isn’t something to worry about and that it’s just harmless pranks done by adolescents on the internet… these people are wrong and sorely out of touch with the current climate online. Many of these people simply believe that not posting their name or address online means they’re safe, however they fail to realize that the interconnectivity of web 2.0 and the incoming ‘internet of things’ have caused many open wounds in everyone’s privacy that bleed an unhealthy amount of information. The average user is taught that the internet just works, sort of like magic, which severely stunts their understanding of the greater image. The internet is built upon decrepit code that’s held together with a programmer’s equivalent of gum and duct tape. Because of this, and quicky-fixes, it’s no wonder database leaks are becoming almost a norm for internet users; however those aren’t the biggest threat. Things like tracking cookies, Facebook spying (on logged in and non-logged in users alike), and things like digital witch hunts are putting innocent people in the line of a cyber firing squad whose main goal is to not only publicly humiliate and shame them but also take their means of living away from, causing complete isolation or ostracization for them and their loved ones. Innocent people are attacked all the time online for things like being the victim of Cat-fishing. In some ways, it’s like doxing and identity theft. You use someone else's information and identity to masquerade as that individual. You then, as this individual, take part in what many refer to as a "romance scam". This can be to try and stalk someone, milk them of their money, or to gain trust to commit a more atrocious act, thus leaving the victims to attack each other while the perpetrator takes their leave. Cat-fishing, although like doxing, isn't actually doxing or the biggest possible threat. Doxing to many is just pizza boxing and flooding a mailbox with literal junk. There are also prank calls, theft of mail and many other acts that can, to some degree, become worse. The issue isn’t that some use doxing as a means to gather information for identity theft. It isn't just ruining your credit or stealing your money, either. There are some individuals out there who'll use doxing as a form of abuse, isolating someone who is emotional to take advantage of them or enable them, which can lead to even greater forms of abuse. It isn't the stalking or physical abuse you should worry about, but the mental and emotional abuse. The stress alone can damage less-than-mature victims and cause a greater sense of isolation that can disrupt relationships. It isn't just pranks and unwanted food anymore; it's now a form of vigilante justice or revenge. It'll be done by those who see themselves as fighting for a cause. They'll ruin the livelihood of many due to any perceived wrong and they’ll continue their antics until the person they’re targeting is destroyed. ___References___: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catfishing https://www.drphil.com/articles/article/720 https://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2013/03/13/doxxing-it-s-like-hacking-but-legal.html https://www.consumer.ftc.gov/features/feature-0014-identity-theft https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Identity_theft https://www.consumer.ftc.gov/media/video-0024-what-if-youre-victim-identity-theft https://www.forbes.com/sites/laurashin/2014/11/18/someone-had-taken-over-my-life-an-identity-theft-victims-story/ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===Why You Should Care About Privacy=== Information is the new form of currency that transcends borders and time. It’s used by both the governments and corporations of the world. Due to this simple fact it’s not only a valuable resource but also an important one when you consider the worth of personal data. You as an individual aren’t worth much, however your personal data is, like what sites you frequent, which adverts you’ve clicked on or which articles you’ve read—your information is worth more than you. Even when dead, your information is valuable and can be sold, traded and collected like a baseball card. Many will remain apathetic about this fact, yet the truth is while you don’t have to worry when you’re dead… you’re alive now and should take precautions. Corporations and government agencies are putting your information into lists and dossiers. These lists and dossiers rest in the dark corners of some data center in Utah that is constantly crawling through the web for new data. Soon it’ll be near impossible for anyone to remove their information from online simply due to the insatiable thirst that the governments and corporations of the world have for data. Everything is being saved or is being scraped. Apps, websites and programs are doing this, quite legally, thanks to the fact that no-one bothers to read the TOS or understands the purposely confusing language that they use when trying to say they’ve a right to your words and ideas. We shouldn’t worry about the government at least, right? Well the government's known for ruining things you love; you should know this by now. You should be wary not of the government as a being but as an entity composed of individuals: • An individual can track an ex-lover • A group of individuals can target another group based upon their political beliefs • A group can view your pornographic viewing habits and use it against you The US government is but one of the major concerns for a person that's privacy minded. They not only spy on everyone, but they receive help from many corporations. These corporations make money off you and your information. They will buy, sell and trade with both the government and other corporations. Sites like Been Verified, Smart Zip and Intelius will gather and place your data on not only their sites but sell it to others.  Even search engines like Google or Bing have your personal information. These sites can have anything from your name to your address or even pictures of your house and vehicles. It may seem like fear mongering and a lot of fuss about nothing, but your information is used for anything and everything. Anyone can find it now and no-one can be too prepared when it comes to their privacy and personal safety. ___References___: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Utah_Data_Center https://www.cnn.com/2013/09/27/politics/nsa-snooping/ https://dailycaller.com/2014/12/22/bombshell-report-irs-targeted-icky-conservative-groups/ https://www.techdirt.com/articles/20131127/00243625384/nsa-spied-porn-habits-radicalizers-planned-to-use-details-to-embarrass-them.shtml https://www.beenverified.com/ https://www.smartzip.com/ https://www.intelius.com/ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===Compartmentalization and You=== When it concerns information security, compartmentalization is the act of limiting access to information through a need-to-know basis to persons or groups who need it in order to perform specific tasks. The concept originates from the military when handling "classified information" and intelligence applications. The basis is that if fewer people know the details, the less likely a mission or task will be jeopardized and be risked. This helps limit the chance that data could be compromised or fall into the hands of enemies. This also explains the varying levels of clearance within organizations, like "TOP SECRET" or the highly restricted "TOP SECRET ULTRA". Like a well-oiled military machine, one must treat their online life like a separate entity that's in no way, shape or form related to their offline life. This is to prevent cross contamination of accounts and information. One such example of compartmentalization in cyber security, for the average internet user, is never using the same username or e-mail address for an account. Another example would be purchasing a subscription to a good, secure VPN to prevent your own IP and ISP from being detected. One other example is the use of add-ons to sanitize your referral links and randomizing your browser's user agent. In the end, the best practice is to treat each and every account as a separate entity isolated from your other accounts. A new e-mail address, username, persona and style of typing will be needed for each and every account you create to prevent possible cross contamination. Please remember these simple steps when creating your accounts: • A different username • A different e-mail address • A different password • Always ensure you never use real world information • Always ensure your avatar and/or signature is of an image you've used nowhere else • Where you can, use a P.O. Box • Where you can, use a pre-paid card instead of your credit or debit • Where you can, use a burner phone (pre-paid cell) instead of your landline or cell number • Use a word processor to double check your written content before posting • Try to limit the use of words you most commonly use • Try to limit what information you provide in your account's profile • Try to limit your overall account count to 10 or less • Never link accounts to each other • Never publicly post e-mail addresses or passwords • Never share or link your chat, instant messenger or social media accounts to people you don't trust • Never use your real name, nor should you ever post your real world information ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===An Introduction to your Digital Footprint=== Transparency for the sake of online socialization and interaction is a threat. This trend won't die anytime soon, mind you. There are many reasons for this, such as the alarming growth of social networks and the demands for online passports or services like Klout. It's obvious that the need for privacy is in increasing demand, but the biggest setback for privacy is you. All those accounts you made in your early internet years? They have most likely left a nice trail that many can follow and use to learn about you and your posting habits. You see, it’s true; everything on the internet lasts. Unlike now, we weren’t taught to be as privacy-minded.  Governments and corporations are fighting to wave privacy off as a paranoid's fantasy, and many privacy groups exist and claim to fight for your rights against the invasion of privacy. But how many actually do help? Many are in bed with corporations and/or the government. Many just demand donations because of a believed slight. Others... others just steal content from each other. The Paranoid's Bible? We just want to spread and share knowledge (and that you shouldn’t pay for sub-par info) whereas others push the meme that just deleting an account will wipe all traces of it. It’s wrong to believe that deleting account actually deletes anything. By law, most sites and services have to keep everything on their servers for a few months to a year or more. So, in a sense, you can never delete an account, hence us telling you that you need to think carefully before creating an account. We believe your various accounts should be like any good camp fire: Well planned. You need to not only think it out but also plan it out and have an emergency plan in case it spreads too far, too fast. Plus it doesn't hurt to have a backup plan to extinguish it in case you no longer have control over it. Your online profiles and accounts shouldn’t just rot. They need to be removed and all traces proving its existence also doused out. Like any good woodsman or woman will tell you: A single campfire can destroy a forest. This is why you must always plan your accounts and profiles out. Like a campfire left alone in a forest, a single account or profile can destroy an entire life. Any one account and/or profile can devastate an entire person’s public image. Yes, in theory, everything will remain cached, copied or saved on some server till the end of days however there are some options still left for you to explore. You have an online footprint and anyone can find it, there’s nothing else to say other than that there are services for doing background checks on everyone and everything for any reason(s). You have a digital trail dedicated to all your old fanfics, photos or images and online debates… anyone who has enough patience can find out who you are online and where you are offline. There are steps that you can take to prevent your online footprint from growing. But nothing short of doxing yourself ([1] self doxing) and learning just how much of your information is online can help. One issue is how you interact with others online. Another issue is how much information you post on the internet. All we can do is give you some simple suggestions before providing you the tools needed to self-dox. Once done, save this information somewhere on your computer or a USB where other's won't find it. Hold onto this until you've read the rest of this guide as this information will help you delete and opt-out of as much as possible. • Self doxing isn’t the act of doxing oneself and posting dox for all to see, it’s the opposite. It’s the act of using the tools, tactics and knowledge often used in doxing to “meta-dox” oneself.  This act's done in private, not in the public's eye. You're to find and delete any traces or information that's found through the self-dox. This is to prevent possible doxing in the future. (E.G: Opting out and having your information deleted from Spokeo, or deleting an old account you’ve associated with your real name). **Remember**: Before deleting any information, read this guide fully. You’ll need to do so to understand what you’re about to partake in and work on. ___References___: https://www.wired.com/2012/07/ff_kaspersky/ https://www.wired.com/2012/04/ff_klout/3/ https://paranoidsbible.tumblr.com/ https://www.hackcommunity.com/Thread-DoX-DoXing-and-How-To-Prevent-It-being-anonymous-within-your-identity?pid=73506 https://minichan.org/topic/7866 https://www.hackcommunity.com/Thread-Tutorial-Maxx-s-Anti-Dox-Handbook?pid=180063 https://offbeathome.com/2013/03/how-to-keep-your-personal-information-private https://netsecurity.about.com/od/perimetersecurity/a/How-Criminals-Use-Google-Maps-Street-View-To-Case-The-Joint.htm https://www.abine.com/blog/2012/how-to-delete-things-from-the-internet/ https://null-byte.wonderhowto.com/inspiration/dont-get-doxed-5-steps-protecting-your-private-information-web-0133806/ https://thebot.net/general-tutorials/233339-how-doxing-works-protect-yourself/#post2372672 https://soyouwannalearnhowto.wordpress.com/2011/05/22/so-you-wanna-learn-how-to-prevent-doxing/ https://school-of-privacy.com/selfdox ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===Finding your Digital Footprint: A Dossier=== The reason to why we’re opting to use a dossier is because it’ll allow you to sort the information that you find on yourself. It's an easy-to-use format, too. This serves as your go-to document, which we recommend that you save in a .txt. We know many will not believe this to be useful as many will say you can't stop the government or corporations from spying on you; however corporations and government aren't out to ruin your life or financial security. The people you have to worry about getting a hold of this information are civilians. They'll contact employers, family and friends all under the guise of social justice or correcting perceived wrongs. Anyone with the right combination of information can guess passwords and security questions, thus accessing your accounts and e-mail addresses to further ruining you and what you’ve built for yourself. The below contains some simplified descriptions of why each piece of information is useful. Name: Even if common, a person’s name (first and/or last) can help verify information. Age: Can confirm certain information. Birth date: Used to verify age and name, plus other information. Location: A general location, like a city or state, can help locate an address. Phone number: Verify name and location. Home address: The home address can usually turn up images and misc information through Google and realtor sites. Possible relations: Relatives, significant others and friends. Usernames: Using the same username over and over again can create a trail. E-mail addresses: The e-mail address can lead to many things, like accounts or possible data-dumps. Accounts: Links to accounts found on various websites can be used to keep a list of where you’ve been. Websites: Most likely has information you don’t realize, like your site’s whois. Misc information: Miscellaneous pieces of information that may seem crucial or of interest. Possible accounts: Similar username or other items that seems to be possibly related. Images: Can verify accounts; find Exif data…ETC. Make two dossiers. One with the information you know and recall, then a second one with the information that you've found online through the use of this guide. Remember to keep these two separate once done as you don’t want to contaminate the information that you remember with the information that you’ve found. Compare them only after you've read this guide fully. ___References___: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/WHOIS ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===Finding your Digital Footprint: Resources=== It’s important to keep track of the information found through the use of the provided dossier. We suggest that you also keep track of how each piece of information was found, as well as what led you to that discovery. This way you’ll be able to provide us with more insight and knowledge on how to prevent information from leaking besides helping us figure out how to remove it. Remember, though, it isn’t who you are but who you used to be and what you’ve once said. This is what most people look for when they wish to dox someone. It's the key to ruining someone’s image or brand, no matter how liked they are online. Knowing what someone said or did in the past will help ruin their present self and devalue their credibility. Now, before you start, put yourself into the shoes of a stranger and think back to previous scenarios or cases where you’ve heard of doxing. The reason we ask this is simple: To see just how varied doxing can be and just how unethical it can get at times. Think of it like this: Imagine someone you’ve argued with and them being so thoroughly upset they’re now wishing nothing short of a pox upon your genitals or the death of your dog. This person has decided to track down every piece of information possible on you that exists online. This hatred is what usually drives people onward toward their goal of doxing. They need to find information on someone and put them in their place or it’s because they believe it’s their moral obligation to track down those who wander away from the status quo or go against the will of a group. Once you get into this frame of mind, don’t think of the information you know, but search for what you don't. Search for items posted in the present and past. You must find this information and use it. Add it to your dossier. You'll get a glimpse of what others see when they comb through your blog and internet past. Now, to make this simpler for you, we're going to end this part with a links and miscellaneous resources. Username:  * https://www.namechk.com/ * https://www.knowem.com/ * https://www.namecheckr.com/  * https://www.checkusernames.com/ General: * https://www.spokeo.com/ * https://www.pipl.com/ * https://www.wink.com/ * https://www.peekyou.com/ * https://www.yoname.com/ * https://www.linkedin.com/ * https://www.search.yahoo.com/ * https://www.google.com/ * https://www.bing.com/ * https://www.reddit.com/ * https://www.aad.archives.gov/aad/series-list.jsp?cat=GS29 * https://www.numberway.com/uk/ * https://www.vinelink.com/vinelink/initMap.do * https://www.jailbase.com/en/sources/fl-lcso/ * https://www.publicrecords.onlinesearches.com/ * https://www.www.abika.com/ * https://www.www.freeality.com/ * https://www.radaris.com/ * https://www.twoogel.com/ * https://www.advancedbackgroundchecks.com * https://www.yellowpagesgoesgreen.org/ * https://www.Intelius.com/ * https://www.PublicRecordsNow.com * https://www.Smartzip.com Social Networks: * https://www.twitter.com/ * https://www.facebook.com/ * https://www.deviantart.com * https://www.xanga.com/ * https://www.tumblr.com/ * https://www.myspace.com/ * https://www.yasni.com/ * https://www.socialmention.com/ * https://www.whostalkin.com/ * https://www.linkedin.com/ * https://www.formspring.me/ * https://www.foursquare.com/ * https://www.about.me/ * https://www.profiles.google.com/ * https://www.blogger.com * https://www.photobucket.com/ * https://www.quora.com/ * https://www.stumbleupon.com/ * https://www.reddit.com * https://www.digg.com * https://www.plixi.com * https://www.pulse.yahoo.com/ * https://www.flickr.com/ Location: * https://www.whitepages.com/person * https://www.maps.google.com/ * https://www.411.com/ * https://www.192.com/ * https://www.zabasearch.com/ * https://www.zillow.com People: * https://www.123people.com/ * https://www.peekyou.com/ * https://www.peoplejar.com/ * https://www.anywho.com/whitepages * https://www.yahoo.intelius.com/ * https://www.findermind.com/free-people-search-engines/ * https://www.ipeople.com * https://www.facebook.com/directory/people/ * https://www.skipease.com/ * https://www.zabasearch.com/ * https://www.wink.com/ * https://www.dobsearch.com/ * https://www.searchbug.com/ * https://www.nationwidecrafts.com/ * https://www.everyone411.com/ * https://wwww.Acxiom.com/ * https://wwww.MyLife.com/ * https://www.Zabasearch.com * https://www.ussearch.com/ * https://www.peoplesmart.com/ * https://www.usa-people-search.com/ * https://www.spoke.com/ * https://www.SOBSearch.com/ * https://www.beenverified.com/ * https://www.peoplefinder.com/ Phone numbers: * https://www.whitepages.com/reverse-lookup * https://www.freecellphonedirectorylookup.com/ * https://www.fonefinder.net/ Images: * https://www.tineye.com/ * https://www.saucenao.com/ * https://www.photobucket.com/ * https://www.revimg.net/ * https://www.iqdb.org/ Programs: * Skype Add-ons (for Firefox): * Exif viewer Whois: * https://www.networksolutions.com/whois/index.jsp Caches: * https://www.archive.is  (Can be used to make your own caches of pages) * https://www.archive.org/   You may have come across similar links from such sites as insurgen.cc or maybe from an image board with an /i/nvasion or /i/nsurgency board. You could've even seen it on some blogger's how-to, but these links...? They're actually well known and have been the staple of a lot of lists and guides on how track a person or persons down. These links will help you find your own information and thus help you dox yourself. **Please remember**: This is but a sampling, if you wish to see a larger chunk of the iceberg that invades our privacy then look at the supplementary guides. Please hold off on the opt-outs until you’ve read this whole guide. We’ve organized the opt-outs to help you speed along with the removal of your information and ask you to wait as we also have various tips and tricks to ensure you do it right. ___References___: https://www.propublica.org/article/privacy-tools-opting-out-from-data-brokers https://consumerist.com/2010/06/21/giant-list-of-data-brokers-to-opt-out-of/ https://money.cnn.com/galleries/2010/technology/1012/gallery.data_miners/index.html https://www.privacyalerts.org/data-brokers.html https://www.privacyrights.org/online-information-brokers-list https://unlistmy.info/sites https://consumerist.com/2010/06/21/giant-list-of-data-brokers-to-opt-out-of/ https://www.cnet.com/how-to/how-to-take-back-your-privacy-from-data-brokers/ https://silversteampunk.tumblr.com/post/70232779066/i-used-this-image-because-ive-seen-it-posted ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Finding your Digital Footprint: Tactics When one looks for information online, there isn’t just one single way to go about it as it’s a mess of tactics, resources and searching until one’s fingers are raw from typing. Because of this, we’ve created a series of simple tactics for you to track down your information online. We also wish to show you how to counteract these tactics due to how commonly used they are by those searching for information on a target. -------------------------------------- Applies to Tumblr only * About Me Leads to About You: Simple and fast, always the first thing you should do when going over a blogger’s profile--Look at the about me or description and see what information is there. • Name? • Age? • Nicknames? • Previous usernames? • Links? • List of tags or posts? Whatever there is, it leads to valuable information that can pad out the dossier. **Counteract**: Never use your real name online, nicknames, or anything of value. This should apply to any and all accounts you own. * Counter Crawling: Use a publicly displayed counter or your own to track someone’s IP and browser print down. **To do this**: Check for a Statcounter or tracker made public, or use your own and bait the target. Now look at what information is displayed and/or look for /blog/username links. Use these to find meta-data like: • Blogs • IP address • General location (ISP or host’s location) • Referral information **Counteract**: Many add-ons help prevent this, like Umatrix or Ublock Origin. You should always use one or more of these add-ons and also look into ensuring that if you host a site that you’ve sanitized your Whois. * Tumblr Cataloging: This is quite simple in all actuality as it only requires time, patience and lots of reading. To start out, one goes to the target blog, then you comb through the /archive/ link or by finding the last page of a blog. In theory you need to find the oldest (the first) post made on the blog and from there, working your way up to most current, you go from page-to-page. You skim posts for key pieces of information that can be used to find information elsewhere or used in a search engine. Things you'll look for: • Exif data from images • Linked image albums • Alternate blog or account links • E-mail addresses • Wish lists • Personal rants • Family or pet names • Real life locations or school names The older the blog, the more likely there are pieces of information that can be used to find their accounts elsewhere online. **Counteract**: Don’t be ignorant or rash, think before you post and watch what you post. Ensure you don’t leak real world information. Remember:  Save images as PNG and always scrub the Exif data. Be careful and post smart. * Tag Hunt: The trend of having to tag every post caused people to be obsessive with certain tags, and to profit from this, one has to check for a tag list or commonly used tags like ‘my face’ or ‘me’. Depending on whether Tumblr pulled an Imgur and removes exif data, images can lead to real world information. **Counteract**: Post smart, save images as PNG and always scrub Exif data. Be general and misleading about things in reality (when discussed online). Swap real names for generic names or handles—High school is now your high school, not Mt. Rush High. * Tag Search: Search the blog’s username and/or title on Tumblr search and Tumblr’s tag search and you can also search previous or past usernames/titles. You can find a lot out on a blogger and who they hang out with by searching them on Tumblr. If they have a previous blog name/title, it can be found by using the “Tumblr cataloging” tactic. Example: 1. Party H re-blogged and responded to Party B. 2. The post Party B re-blogged was from Party A. The post from Party A is on Party H’s blog. 3. Party H is the source but older posts  (re-blogged by others) show it re-blogged from Party A. 4. This means Party H and Party A are one in the same and that Party H changed the name/title. Searching their previous names/titles on Tumblr can and will usually lead to excellent information. Remember though, you’ll need patience and to take some time going through these tags. **Counteract**: Don’t change your title/name or do so often enough to limit each change’s exposure. You’ve done all that you’ve could on Tumblr; you’ve gotten some information… now what? Well, it’s time to breakout Google or some other search engine and start using various combinations of the information that you’ve found to see what trails that you can uncover. -------------------------------------------- General information and searching * Account Hopping: The older an account, the more likely it will link to another account somewhere else. Similar to a few of the Tumblr tactics, one just has to search tags, keywords, and comb through the accounts. Usually it’s a comment or even a keyword itself.  This has better success on Wordpress or Blogger accounts, also in descriptions on profiles. **Counteract**: Always wait a month before deleting an account. Remove any and all posts, texts, and information. Before deleting the text or posts, first fill them with random characters/text. This is to force a new cache from various search engine and services. This should render previous ones inaccessible and only leave traces of nothing. **Example**: Instead of a lengthy diatribe against your old significant other, it’s ‘sldknlskndlfkndlkslfksldkfndslksdnflksklnfdslkfsdnklds’. Also, for images or videos, upload blank images and static filled videos. * CTRL + U sourcing it: Check custom layouts on various blogging platforms for websites and links. Various sites allow individuals to add their own custom flair to things, for example a layout and separate page designs. You can find links to storage accounts or image upload services by checking the source. This usually leads to photobucket accounts, imageshack accounts or personal servers. It could also expose a cloud storage account that can be searched or forced into exposing more information. **Counteract**: Use the month rule and the random text/character trick before deletion. You should also name all images randomly instead of using actual words. Don’t put anything in obvious order and always ensure your password is strong to prevent brute forcing or guessing. **Note on passwords**:  8 to 12 characters long with random letters, numbers and characters. * E-mail address surfing: Using any number of websites or search engines, one can enter an email address to lookup. Using its variations (@gmail, hotmail, yahoo…ETC) you can find miscellaneous accounts. This can also lead to information and possible dead-accounts or addresses. You could use a dead address and resurrect it anew to claim accounts and to learn information like passwords and IPs or offline information. **Counteract**: Use a different e-mail address for each account and ensure to have a separate secondary account for it. Don’t display your E-mail address and never give it out, or at least use a secondary-secondary as a fake for public display. * Face snipping: Find a picture of someone online. Crop out everything but their face. Using the (cropped) image of just their face and/or head, go to Tineye and see if you can find results. Usually you’ll be able to find accounts. Using this, you can find abandoned social media pages that contain information about relatives, schools and businesses. **Counteract**: Never post your image online, ever. Also scrub exif data. * Forum scouting: Find an account on a forum; search the forum for more information. Most forums have a search function that allows you to search a username plus keywords, it’s simple and quick. Search specific things like: • Social network names • Usernames • E-mails • General keywords (example: email, account, art, location, school) Double check posts for signatures or avatars that can be traced back to other accounts. If that isn’t possible, then check the user’s profile for a post counter that may or may not be clickable. This will usually lead to all their posts. **Counteract**: One month wait before deletion, plus random characters in the posts. Also request the owner/mods/staff to delete account and all posts. * Gaia sleuthing: Go to their forums and search them, or profiles for similar usernames and information. Check against a search engine with things like “Username,” “Gaia,” “E-mail” and whatever else. This usually leads to various forums and other accounts. This tactic can also be applied to Neopets, among other sites. **Counteract**: Follow the deletion trick of random characters…Etc. Don’t giveaway your items. Don’t donate your gold or cash. Just delete everything within the month rule. * Photobucket jumping: Just searching usernames against account links like ‘photobucket.com/user/-username-‘ or ‘photobucket.com/profile/-username-‘ to find an account. Once an account is discovered, people can search parts or the whole URL of any direct image link. This allows people to find where you’ve posted your images and thus your accounts. **Counteract**: Delete your images and photobucket account. Don’t put a password on it and don’t let it idle…it’ll lasts forever. Remember to use the one month rule and blank image trick. * Username searching: Search the username using a search engine or one of several username check websites. Just find any and all accounts with a similar username and then check its information against that in the dossier. **Counteract**: Never use the same username twice. Always change it, no matter what. Never share your accounts with anyone or announce your accounts elsewhere and never inter-link accounts. -------------------------------------------------- Vanity Searching (Ego hunting/surfing | Kibozing) In simplicity, vanity searching is the act of searching one’s own name or pseudonym on a popular search engine or the internet at large to find results on one’s self. Most individuals usually do this as a meta-checkmark on what information of theirs or concerning them appears on the popular search engines or websites accessible to the public. Now vanity searching is a great tool to find those golden little nuggets of information that you didn’t know existed online. While many just stick to variations of their name, we’d like to suggest the below list of searches you can make plus some combinations to help you on your way to digital freedom. Common Vanity Search Queries: 1. Full name (First, Middle, Last and/or marks JR/SR/2nd/ 3rd…etc) 2. First + last name 3. First name 4. Last name/home address 5. Name combinations + birth-date 6. Name combinations + home/street address 7. Name combinations + school 8. Name combinations + work 9. Name combinations + vote, voted or voting 10. Street address 11. Relatives names + name combinations 12. Usernames + name combinations 13. Usernames 14. E-mail addresses 15. E-mail addresses + usernames 16. Websites or accounts + usernames 17. Websites or accounts + e-mail addresses 18. Usernames + city or state 19. Name combinations + city or state 20. The above + IP addresses or ISP 21. The above + known leak or dump searches (E.G: Have I Been PWNED) ------------------------------ These tactics are but a sampling of what many people do on a daily basis to find the information of others. We just list the most common and easiest to do for you to help you find your online footprint but you shouldn’t believe that this is it, really look into variations and be creative when trying to find your own information… you’ll be surprised by just how much of it exists online. ___References___: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Egosurfing https://haveibeenpwned.com/ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===Finding your Digital Footprint: Things to know and do=== This chapter is dedicated to providing you with various steps that you can take to prevent cross-referencing through multiple accounts. A single piece of information posted in one location can be used against you and lead to another account. If not taken into careful consideration, something as simple as your first name could lead to your inevitable doxing. Imagine if you will that you have an account on a site about model trains. You signed up with your first name and used your old AOL e-mail address. Someone looking for you discovers you like trains; however all they have on you is an old username. They search this username, which is used in your old AOL e-mail address. They discover your model train account and first name. Search with various variations of your e-mail address and name, thus discover a newsletter of your town’s local hobby shop and model train group. They now know your full name, your hobby group, your old e-mail address and several other pieces of information that, when combined, lead to your home address. Congratulations, you have been doxed. The below information serves more as a guideline than actual rules, which should be followed but can be modified or ignored based upon the individual and their privacy needs. These are just some ways to deter information from getting away from you and being used by others to discover your information. So, please, do see the below as some daunting task but a series of suggestions. When leaving an account: o When leaving, don’t announce it. o Tell no one that you’re deleting your account. o Delete your account only after a month of inactivity and delete it only after switching it to a *‘Dead E-mail address’. • Note: An e-mail address used to take ownership of an account that you’re deleting/deactivating. Steps to take before deleting an account: o Before deleting anything, wait a month. o Anything you can edit, do so with random characters and text. o Images should be replaced with a blank temp image (pure color image). o Videos should be replaced with either a solid color or static. o Once a month is over, you can delete that account. o But before doing so, delete the account’s items one by one. o If you can’t delete something, ask the staff/owner/webmaster/mods to delete it for you. o Stating that someone is stalking you is usually enough to remove the information. o If they won’t remove, try to edit it once again with random text. o If you can’t edit it, ignore it. o If it’s a blog, change titles and/or usernames. o Preserve the original URL or username on a blank blog or account. o Never leave your old username or URL up for grabs. On removing an old E-mail address: o Never delete an e-mail address, simply switch accounts and other items accordingly. o Mark everything else in it as spam, but only if you can’t unsubscribe. o Log into it at least once a month to prevent deletion. o You can most likely delete it after not using it around a year or two later. o Always make sure the e-mail is no longer tied to any accounts or personal information. o Always wipe it out like any other account by changing as much as possible to randomized text. On account maintenance: o Never use your real name. o Never upload an image of yourself. o Never use your real location. o Never discuss your time zone. o Never discuss your current time. o Always use English, at all times. o Never discuss events happening in your area. o Never mention race or skin color. o Never mention religion. o Never mention sexuality. o Never discuss your hobbies in great detail. o Don’t talk about your fetishes or kinks. o Accounts shouldn’t be cross-linked to other accounts/sites. o If you do, make sure no username is the same. o And make sure no e-mail address displayed is the same. o Use a different e-mail address for each account. o Keep accounts separate if not needed to be linked. o Never link RP accounts to other accounts and social networking profiles o Don’t mention how many pets you have or their names. o The same applies to family members, neighbors, friends and significant others. o Scrape as much information off of something as possible. o Boil it all down to the core basics. o Never keep an account longer than a year (some exceptions apply). On talking to strangers: o Never display your messenger, Skype or chat names anywhere online. o Give it to others only if they ask you (and you trust them). o Keep all forms of instant messaging and chat private. o Don’t save logs. o Only give out to trusted individuals. o This applies to IRC channels and chat setups. o Lock down as much as possible. o Never use real names or information, ever. o Don’t tell other people who you talk to online. o Never place your full name on Skype (or any service). o Limit the profile you have on Skype (and any  other service). o Make sure all options are set to private. o If it can’t be set to private, then set to contacts. o Like Skype, any chat client or instant messenger should be locked down. On behavior: o You’ll most likely have to change the way you behave online. o Sharing interests is fine, but getting too obsessed is bad. o Never admit to liking any specific thing. o This can help people tie other accounts to you. o Admitting to things like your favorite food can be used to trace too. o In general, you need to keep yourself and your information limited when on the internet. o Instead of admitting to liking a song, just say you like the band. o This applies to specific bands in smaller genres, too. o Or any form of entertainment that you specifically like. o Instead of specific parts you like in a game, you just like the game. o Remember: don’t talk about your location. o Don’t talk about your general location in detail. o Don’t mention what it’s known for (produce, exports, colleges, universities…etc). o Don’t make mention of recent weather, as that can be used in junction with other information o Don’t say the exact time. o Be wary of saying exactly what the temperature is. o If the person you’re talking to uses Celsius, then tell the temp in Celsius. o If the person you’re talking to uses Fahrenheit, then tell the temp in Fahrenheit. o Don’t make mention of general information like school names or street names. o Don't make mention eateries/restaurants as they can be unique to your location. o Always refer to your city/town as a college town. o Never post selfies. o Never post nudes. o Never post porn. o Never post erotica. When getting personal: o Don’t discuss siblings or family members to great extent. o Don’t drop pet names. o Don’t drop the name of anyone related to you. o Don’t drop the name of friends. o Don’t drop the name of politicians. o Don’t drop the names of people you’ve had relationships with. o Keep age to a general rounded number, like, the 20s…etc o Keep personal descriptions down. o Keep weight to a more general descriptor (overweight, obese…etc). On talking about life experiences: o Never do so in the first place. o If you do, don’t let incriminating evidence be traced back to you. o Or at least make sure you can discuss such things in a secure environment. o Also don’t attach anything about you to your online personas and/or accounts. On using custom domains: o Ask your host about Whois masking. o If they don’t offer it, check into other services. On online relationships: o Don’t do online dating. o Don’t sext. o Don’t cyber. o Don’t do erotic roleplay. o Don’t go to online dating websites. o Don’t take part in relationship, dating, sex…etc help sites/forums/chats. Just use common sense. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===Deleting Your Information=== Using what you now know from the above chapters, it’s time to work on deleting your information, old account and general internet presence. While it may seem hard to do and quite the task to take up, understand it’s for the greater good. By doing this now, you’ll have less to worry about in the future and won’t have to worry about things coming back to haunt you. No more embarrassing teenage antics or silly digital slap fights, only a clean and fresh digital presence that the civilian population and potential employers can critique or use against you. This chapter will be quite short as all the information above should not only be beneficial but enough to get you going, however there are still a few things to point out just so you’re prepared to dive in and work yourself ragged to cover up the fact that you used to like a certain animated series. First off, before we begin ensure you’ve read the above fully and understand what’s been written, from there compare the dossiers and see what information you know VS the information you found. Now ignore any people search engines and focus only upon accounts. Pick an account and work on that one only, as that’s going to be the only account that you’ll be working on until you’ve finished ‘sanitizing’ it. To recap, remember the One Month Rule: 1. Wait a month before deleting an account. 2. Within that month, hide and/or delete all comments that you can that aren’t yours. 3. Modify and change everything that you can. 4. Any editable text should be randomized (E.G: wodegnoi2n402) 5. Images should be changed to a blank or solid color image. 6. Videos should be changed to a solid color or static video. 7. All CSS and HTML, that’s editable, should be wiped out. 8. Change the e-mail address used to register the account with something else. 9. Check your e-mail addresses against HIBP to ensure nothing has been compromised. 10. Repeat the above steps for each account and e-mail address. Once done, before deleting the account, head over to the Internet Time Machine and contact them at this e-mail address: info@archive.org. Request their archives of your account to be removed, simply state it’s for privacy concerns (or if you’re being stalked or doxed, state safety) and provide them a screen-cap of you being logged into the account. If the account is attached to any groups or similar items, and you’ve made or own them, please also request the removal of those archives too. Now, while you’re waiting for the month to finish up, move onto your next account and repeat the above steps and recommended procedures. Keep this up until all of your accounts have been modified, sanitized and deleted (once the full month is up). If your Social security number, a credit card or debit card number or any other private information is attached to it (or if you own some digital content exclusive to that account) don’t delete it, yet, just follow the above and let it rot (sit and not touched) in case you need to access that account again. With accounts like Discord, Skype and Tox (among similar items) can be removed following the above yet with minor modifications. You don’t want to delete these accounts, just nullify them and cut all contact with anyone attached to them. You have to remove all custom labels/nicks/nicknames for your contacts, block each one and delete them from your contact/friends list. Then, fill it out all profile entries with underscores ( __ ) if you can blank them out or delete items you’ve entered previously. Ensure everything has been changed to private or contact, too. You should be able to use the above plus the previous chapters in order to remove and sanitize any of your information that exists on the internet. Slight modifications may be needed, however this should be enough for you to cover your tracks and prevent any potential dox or attacks. Accounts like Steam and Origin shouldn’t be removed or deleted (even if you could) as these are either tied to private information or purchases. Just blank out as much as possible and adjust profile settings to whatever max privacy is considered. You shouldn’t have these accounts mad public in the first place; always ensure they’re set to invisible and restricted access or no access. Now, everything should hopefully have been removed and you’ve been able to do everything in your power to lessen your digital footprint. Move onto the below chapter, but remember this: Keep a list of all your usernames that you’ve used, these can be applied to another tactic in later guides. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===Opt-out Master-list=== The purpose of this chapter is to provide you with an up-to-date listing of any and all opt-outs for people databases or search engines. This means you’ll be able to opt-out of not only known data brokers but several unknown brokers. You'll even cut down on physical mail and e-mail. Many feel this isn’t needed as you have to provide information to remove information, but this is what’s needed. Not just by the law but also for business records. Opt-outs are just you acknowledging a contract made without your knowledge. Instead of ignoring them, you’re stating you don’t want them using or selling your information. It not only helps reduce your online footprint but also helps you cut back on carbon emissions and overall exposure across the internet with things you didn’t know exist (E.G: Opt of one site and others follow suite). For now, we've only include the online opt-outs in this PDF. We suggest you finish those and those alone as most of them are interlinked to many of the phone and fax opt-outs. Once you finished those you should wait a month or two before doing other opt-outs. A lot of information will be expunged as you opted out of one or two other sites. Online Opt-outs: These are opt-outs that can be done online through forms or simple links without a pay wall. https://www.10digits.us/ https://www.10digits.us/remove • Requires photo ID upload + e-maill addess + page link. • Make sure to search using all three methods. • Repeat for each immediate family member in your residence. https://www.411.info https://www.411.info/contact/ • Find your info, copy the link. • Go to the contact link and ask them to remove your info. • Provide the link(s) in the message. https://www.500millionphonerecords.com/ https://www.phonedetective.com/PD.aspx?_act=OptOut • Follow the instructions on the Phonedetective opt-out link. • Repeat for each individual in household and any and all numbers you've owned or recall owning. https://www.accutellus.com/ https://www.accutellus.com/opt_out_request.php • Follow the instructions on the opt-out page, repeat for all individual in household. https://www.Acxiom.com/ https://www.isapps.acxiom.com/optout/optout.aspx (Cookie opt-out can be ignored if you install ad blocking and privacy based add-ons on your browser) • For the actual opt-out, just follow the above link and follow the instructions, repeating it for each residence in your house. • After each successful entry fill out, you’ll be taken to a new page with a capatcha and a field to confirm the e-mail address. • Log into your e-mail account, find the confirmation e-mail, and follow the link provided. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://www.addresses.com/ https://www.addresses.com/optout.php • Follow instructions on page, repeat for each individual in household. https://www.addresssearch.com/ https://www.addresssearch.com/remove-info.php • Follow instructions on page, repeat for each individual in household. https://www.allareacodes.com/ https://www.allareacodes.com/remove_name.htm • Follow instructions on page, repeat for each individual in household. https://www.archives.com/ https://www.archives.com/ga.aspx?_act=Optout • Follow instructions on page, repeat for each individual in household. https://www.checkpeople.com/ https://www.checkpeople.com/optout • Follow instructions on page, repeat for each individual in household. https://www.corporationwiki.com/ https://www.corporationwiki.com/profiles/public • Follow instructions listed on their website. • Very few cases, only for businesses and their executives. https://www.coxtarget.com/ https://www.coxtarget.com/mailsuppression/s/DisplayMailSuppressionForm • Wait until you’ve received your next ‘ValPak’ packet\envelope. • Go to the opt-out form\link above. • Enter information as it is on the envelope. • You’ve opted out. https://www.datalogix.com/ https://www.datalogix.com/privacy/#opt-out-landing https://www.aboutads.info/  (More info here) • Find this sentence ‘If you wish to opt out of all Datalogix-enabled advertising across channels including direct mail, online, mobile and analytic products, and click here.’ • Follow directions, repeat for each resident of household. https://www.dexone.com/ https://www.dexknows.com/ https://www.dexpages.com/index.asp? https://www.dexone.com/privacy-policy https://green.dexknows.com/DexGreen/selectDexAction.do • Enter zip code. • Follow directions. • If you can’t opt-out, you can do so VIA the Yellow Pages opt-out. https://www.directmail.com/ https://www.directmail.com/directory/mail_preference/ • Follow directions in second link. https://www.dmachoice.org/ https://www.dmachoice.org/register.php • Follow directions on website. • Have to create an account for each member of household. https://www.dobsearch.com/ • Search yourself; address; phone number…etc • Find info. • Look for ‘Is this you? Manage your listing!’ • Follow instructions (You’ll need a valid e-mail address + landline or cell). • Repeat for all residents in house (One per 24 hours). https://www.donotcall.gov https://www.donotcall.gov/register/reg.aspx • Follow directions. • Enter phone numbers, cell and/or landline, and an e-mail address. https://www.ebureau.com/ https://www.ebureau.com/privacy-center/opt-out • Same as DMA choice opt-out, but no accounts; you’ll have to do this with previous addresses too. https://www.emailfinder.com/ https://www.emailfinder.com/EFC.aspx?_act=Optout • Follow instructions on screen. • Repeat for each resident in household. https://www.epsilon.com/ https://www.epsilon.com/consumer-preference-center https://www.optoutprescreen.com • Go to third link and follow their process (only needs to be done once). https://www.everify.com https://www.everify.com/legal.php#2 https://www.everify.com/legal.php#remove • Follow instructions on page, repeat for each individual in household. https://www.experian.com/ https://www.experian.com/privacy/opting_out_preapproved_offers.html https://www.optoutprescreen.com • Go to third link and follow their process (only needs to be done once). https://equifax.com/ https://help.equifax.com/app/answers/detail/a_id/2/noIntercept/1/kw/prescreen https://www.optoutprescreen.com • Go to third link and follow their process (only need to be done once). https://www.everyone411.com/ • Go to contact page @ https://www.everyone411.com/contact • Provide listing links. • Request removal. • Repeat for all individuals in household. https://www.freephonetracer.com/ https://www.freephonetracer.com/FCPT.aspx?_act=OptOut • Online opt-out form, follow directions. https://www.health.com/health/ https://subscription.timeinc.com/storefront/privacy/health/generic_privacy_form_offline.html?dnp-source=E%20AND%20 https://subscription.timeinc.com/storefront/privacy/health/generic_privacy_form_online.html?dnp-source=E • Fill out with your information, repeat for each individual in your household. Make sure to check all boxes in the two opt-out links. https://www.ims-dm.com/ https://www.ims-dm.com/cgi/optoutemps.php • Follow directions on second link. • Enter up to three emails. • Fill captcha. • Clear cache and repeat as necessary. https://www.infousa.com/ https://www.infousa.com/StaticPage/PrivacyPolicyInfo.htm • Look for: Opt Out Policy–Upon a visitor’s request, InfoUSA Inc. • Read it carefully, scroll down and find the ‘E-mail form’. • Fill it out, include your name, birth date, address and phone number. Request all information of yours to be removed, especially anything related to the info you just provided. https://www.infospace.com/ https://www.support.infospace.com/privacy/ • Search for ‘Choice/Opt-out’. • The link there is old, use this one: https://infospace.com/contact/index.html • Select 'General inquiry'. • Provide your name, birth date, address and phone number. • Request all information of yours be removed, especially anything matching or related to information you just provided. https://www.innovis.com/ https://www.innovis.com/InnovisWeb/pers_lc_opt_out.html https://www.optoutprescreen.com • Go to third link and follow their process (only needs to be done once). https://www.instantpeoplefinder.com/ https://www.instantpeoplefinder.com/optout.php • Follow on page instructions, repeat for each individual in household. https://www.locatefamily.com/ https://www.locatefamily.com/contact.html • Search for your name on the left side of the site. • You’ll find a page or pages containing Names, addresses and phone numbers. • Find yours; take note of the number next to it. • Go to the contact page. • Scroll down for the opt-out\removal form. • Follow the directions. • Make sure to provide the information you want deleted in the ‘Comments’ box. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://www.lookup.com/ https://www.lookup.com/optout.php • Go to the opt-out link. • Follow the directions. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://lycos.com https://info.lycos.com/resources/privacy-policy • Search for: How can you access or edit your information? • Follow directions. https://www.mobilephoneno.com/ https://www.mobilephoneno.com/help.htm • Search for: How do I delete my entry? • Follow directions. https://www.militaryavenue.com/ https://www.militaryavenue.com/Contact.aspx • Businesses only. • But, if you have your information up there, somehow. • First find said info. • Go to the contact page. • Select, from the drop down, “Incorrect Business information”. • Provide link, info, and ask for removal. https://www.myyp.com/ https://www.yellowpagesoptout.com • Follow instructions on second link. https://www.nationwidecrafts.com/ • Find listing. • Click the suggestion link/light bulb icon. • Request removal. https://www.orientaltrading.com/ https://www.orientaltrading.com/ui/help/processRequest.do?requestURI=link.removeForm • Follow instructions on second link. https://www.peekyou.com/ https://www.peekyou.com/about/contact/optout • Search for yourself. • Locate your profile and right-click then select 'copy link'. • Then open a new tab and go to their opt-out page and follow the instructions provided. • Repeat with each individual in household. https://www.peepdb.com/ • Enter full name + state. • Look for city + state in results. • Can confirm by partial phone number listed. • Click your result. • Scroll down. • Click ‘Remove This Listing’. • Follow directions. • Takes 10 business days. • One request + IP every 3 days. • Repeat with each individual in household. https://www.peoplebook.com/ https://www.peoplebook.com/support.htm • Search for your people book’s results. • Confirm it’s yours. • Grab link. • Go to the support link. • Follow directions. • Repeat for each individual in house. https://www.peoplefinder.com/ https://www.peoplefinder.com/manage/ https://www.peoplefinder.com/optout.php • Go directly to the opt-out link. • Fill in your information. • Select from the drop down ‘General privacy concerns’. • Enter the code word and click submit. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://www.peoplefinders.com/ https://www.peoplefinders.com/manage/default.aspx • Search your first, middle and last name in search. • State + city, too. • Find your listing, click ‘this is me’. • Skip the AD and\or sale section. • Takes anywhere from an hour to a month. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://www.peoplesearchpro.com/ https://www.peoplesmart.com/optout-go • Go directly to Opt-out. • Enter your name + city and state. • Find it, click it, and follow directions. • You will have to make an account. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://www.peoplesmart.com/ https://www.peoplesmart.com/opt-out? • Follow the People Smart opt-out instruction. • You’ll be shown a page of results, locate yours. • Click the ‘This is me’. • Look at the ‘Business’ listings, find anything of yours and click the “This is me” or skip the step if none exist. • Uncheck all options, except the last two. • Click ‘Save Settings’. • It’ll have you create an account, make sure to use a unique password only for this site and use nowhere else. • Repeat for each individual in your household (sans the account). • Repeat search, but this time with home address applied. https://www.peoplewise.com/ https://www.peoplewise.com/show/optoutdisclaimer • Go straight to the opt-out link. • Make sure JS and Cookies are enabled. • Follow the steps; make sure to read the red text. • When you find your list, click the ‘Removal’ test under the blue button. • When you’re on your page, within the red text, is a blue link, click it. • Enter your email address + security code. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://www.phonebook.com/ https://www.whitepages.com/ https://www.whitepages.com/privacy_central#6 • Go to Whitepages.com • Create an account. • Search for your information VIA address, name, phone number...etc • Claim each and every piece of information that's confirmed as yours. • Verify through e-mail and phone. • Then go to your profile. • Scroll down and request your information to be hidden\removed from the directory. • Follow the on screen prompts. • Logout, clean cache. • Create an account for each individual in household, repeat until finished. https://www.phonebooks.com/ • Search your name + city and state. • Find your listing in the results. • Click on said listing. • Locate ‘Remove this person’. • Follow directions. • Repeat for each and every individual in household. https://www.phonedetective.com/ https://www.phonedetective.com/PD.aspx?_act=OptOut • Go directly to opt-out page, follow directions. • Repeat for each individual in house. • Also repeat with each phone number you have or recall having. https://phonenumber.com/ https://www.whitepages.com/ https://www.whitepagescustomers.com https://www.whitepagescustomers.com/draft-how-do-i-remove-my-people-search-listing/ • Create an account . • Search for your information VIA address, name, phone number...etc • Claim each and every piece of information that's confirmed as yours. • Verify through e-mail and phone. • Then go to your profile. • Scroll down and request your information to be hidden/removed from the directory. • Follow the on screen prompts. • Logout, clean cache. • Create an account for each individual in household, repeat until finished. https://www.poedit.org/ https://www.poedit.org/auth/removal_request.html • Search for your page/information. • Take link/URL. • Copy it to the appropriate area listed in the second link. • Submit. • Find confirmation e-mail in inbox. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://www.privateeye.com/ https://www.peoplefinders.com/manage/ • Go to the People Finders link. • Enter your information. • On the results page you can refine your searches with age + birth-date. • Find your results and click ‘This is me’. • Follow instructions. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://profileengine.com/ https://profileengine.com/#/help https://profileengine.com/#/claimprofile • Search for profile. • Look for the claim profile option. • If not present, try the claim profile link above. • Follow instructions. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://pub360.com https://pub360.com/s/faq • Search for your name. • In results, look for the 'Information Removal' tab. • Follow instructions provided. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://radaris.com/ https://radaris.com/removal/ https://radaris.com/page/how-to-remove • Search for a name. • On the search results page, select the name that is most appropriate. • On the profile page, click the down-arrow to the right of the name and select ‘Control Information’. • From the information control page, choose ‘Remove information’. • Here you can choose to remove all information, or to delete specific records. • Confirm your real name matches your account and profile name. • Enter your cellular phone to receive a verification code. • Once the code has been entered, the profile will be private. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://www.redplum.com/ https://www.redplum.com/tools/redplum-postal-addremove.html • Follow the instructions provided on the second link. • Per known address. https://www.reversephonelookup.com/ https://www.reversephonelookup.com/remove.php • Go to second link. • Follow instruction provided. • Repeat for all known and owned phone numbers. https://www.searchbug.com/ https://www.searchbug.com/help.aspx?WHAT=people • Search for your name + city and state. • If ‘Free record’ is shown, you can click the garbage can\remove link to have it removed. • Repeat for all individuals in house. • Note: Premium records can't be removed through this process as they require manual removal and cost payment to do so. https://www.Spokeo.com https://www.spokeo.com/optout • Go to Spokeo. • Search your First, middle and last name. • Find your profile/listing by go to the bottom of the page and select ‘open advance filter’. • Fill out your information. • Find your profile/listing, copy the link (note: Right click+ copy link to have a ‘Clean link’ copied). • Go to the Opt out link. • Follow instructions to opt-out. • Repeat for each individual in house. • Hint: You’ll need a different e-mail address after so many removals. • Hint: You may have multiple profiles/links due to previous addresses. • Hint: Make sure HTTPs is not at the start of the link, if it is just remove the 'S'. https://www.usa.com https://www.peoplesmart.com/ https://www.peoplesmart.com/opt-out • Follow the People Smart opt-out instruction. • You’ll be shown a page of results, locate yours. • Click the ‘This is me’. • Look at the “Business” listings, find anything of yours and click the “This is me” or skip the step if none exist. • Uncheck all options, except the last two. • Click ‘Save Settings’. • It’ll have you create an account, make sure to use a unique password only for this site and use nowhere else. • Repeat for each individual in your household (sans the account). • Repeat search, but this time with home address applied. https://www.usa-people-search.com/ https://www.usa-people-search.com/manage/default.aspx • Go to the ‘Manage’ link. • Enter your information. • Find your listing. • Enter Captcha and tick both boxes. • Repeat for each individual in house. https://www.usbizplace.com/ https://www.usbizplace.com/contact-us.html • Find your listing with your information. • Follow directions on the contact-us page. • Repeat for all listings of yours you wish to remove. https://www.webcrawler.com/ https://www.webcrawler.com/support/privacypolicy https://www.webcrawler.com/support/contactus • Go to Webcrawler.com, search for your info. • Select link + note its order in the listing. • Contact them at the 'Contact us' link. • Request removal due to privacy concerns. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://www.whitepages.com/ https://www.whitepagescustomers.com https://www.whitepagescustomers.com/draft-how-do-i-remove-my-people-search-listing/ • Create an account. • Search for your information VIA address, name, phone number...etc. • Claim each and every piece of information that's confirmed as yours. • Verify through e-mail and phone. • Then go to your profile. • Scroll down and request your information to be hidden\removed from the directory. • Follow the on screen prompts. • Logout, clean cache. • Create an account for each individual in household, repeat until finished. https://www.valassis.com/ https://www.valassis.com/1024/Contact/MailingListRemoval.aspx • Follow instructions on second link. • Repeat for all known addresses. https://www.valpak.com/ https://www.coxtarget.com/mailsuppression/s/DisplayMailSuppressionForm • Wait till next envelope comes in the mail. • Enter the info exactly as it is on the envelope. • Repeat for all known addresses. https://www.wyty.com/ https://www.wyty.com/optout.aspx • Enter cell number (or phone number). • Select 'Request'. • Should be removed within 24hrs to a month. • Repeat for all known numbers. https://www.yellowbook.com/ https://www.yellowpagesoptout.com/ • https://delivery.ypg.com/en/US/Home/Index/ (Canada opt-out). • Follow directions on 'Yellowpagesoptout' link. • Enter zip\area code. • Create account. • Select items to opt-out. • Repeat for all known addresses. https://www.yellowpages.com https://www.yellowpagescom.intelius.com/optout.php • Fill out opt-out form. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://www.yellowpagesgoesgreen.org/ https://www.yellowpagesgoesgreen.org/terms_of_service.php?#privacy • On the page with your information, look for ‘Are you the business owner’. • Click it, select ‘Delete\remove listing’. • Simply state your privacy concerns. • Repeat for each individual in household. https://www.ziplocal.com/ https://ziplocal.com/online-privacy-policy/ https://www.ziplocalonline.com/manage-listings • To update your listing, use the search box above to look for your business. • When you locate your business, simply select the Update Business link and follow the instructions. https://www.zoominfo.com/ https://www.zoominfo.com/lookupEmail • You'll be asked to provide your e-mail address. • They'll search your address against their database. • You'll receive an e-mail concerning whether or not they've your e-mail address. • If not, nothing to worry about, but if they do they provide a means to opt-out. • Repeat for each individual in household. --------------------------------------------------- Miscellaneous Opt-outs: This list contains opt-outs that have no direct place but have proven useful. https://www.ameridex.com/ https://www.ameridex.com/privacy.html  (review privacy policy for more info) 1. Another website that wants you to send an e-mail or send direct mail\snail mail opt-outs. 2. Also needs court order or proof of potential harm. https://archive.org/ https://archive.org/about/exclude.php https://web.archive.org/web/20140812200246/https://www2.sims.berkeley.edu/research/conferences/aps/removal-policy.html 1. If you're allowed to modify your account or website's HTML, add this somewhere in between the <head> tags. 2. <META NAME="ia_archiver" CONTENT="NOINDEX, NOFOLLOW"> https://www.Bing.com https://ssl.bing.com/profile/history?oma=toggle_off 1. Disable personalized nonsense and ads. Remove your property's street view on Bing Maps: 1. Go to: https://www.bing.com/maps/ 2. Type home address. 3. Get to street view. 4. Center squarely on house. 5. Look for (?) question mark near bottom right. Be careful as it can be hidden sometimes. 6. Click it. 7. Select ’Report an image concern’ 8. You'll get a pop-up or new tab with a panoramic image. 9. Select your house, a little red square will appear then. 10. Voice your privacy concern, stating vandalism and potential break-ins by criminal elements who use online maps to scout\case potential targets. 11. Fill out the rest of the form + Capatcha, wait. 12. Save ticket (#) Number. https://www.catalogchoice.org/ 1. Join site with an e-mail and password used nowhere else. 2. Search for the catalogs you’ve received. 3. Follow instructions to opt-out. 4. This site just organizes websites; they aren’t associated with any of them. https://courtclick.com/ https://courtclick.com/terms.php https://www.courtclick.com/support/ 1. Look for ‘Opt Out Policy: Note that public records such as court records can be updated or corrected, but not removed unless expunged, sealed, court ordered or the like.’ 2. You'll need to have your records sealed first. https://www.emailtracer.com https://www.emailtracer.com/tos.php 1. Search for ‘Opt Out Policy’. 2. Only under certain circumstances. https://www.facebook.com/settings?tab=ads&view 1. Edit button in your Ads settings page, selecting No one and saving your changes. https://www.Google.com https://plus.google.com/settings/endorsements https://www.google.com/ads/preferences/ https://history.google.com/history/ 1. These links help make sure your Google data stays yours. 2. You can opt-out of having your likes and such shared. 3. Help limit ads and similar issues. 4. And even help prevent your history on your account from being given out. Remove your property's street view on Google Maps: 1. Go to Google Maps and type in your address. 2. Bring up the street view of your property. 3. Look to the bottom right hand corner of the screen you should see an Icon Labeled ‘report a problem.’ 4. Click on ‘report a problem.’ 5. You will get a page labeled “report inappropriate street view.” 6. Look for the words “Privacy Concerns” and click on them. 7. If you want your house blurred, click on ‘my house.’ Then choose the option ‘I have a picture of my house and would like it blurred.’ 8. Adjust the image and show Google which part of the photo needs blurred. 9. Type the verification code at the bottom of the page into the box provided and click submit. 10. Check back in a few days to see if the image has been blurred. https://www.lexisnexis.com/ https://www.lexisnexis.com/privacy/directmarketingopt-out.aspx https://www.lexisnexis.com/privacy/for-consumers/opt-out-of-lexisnexis.aspx 1. requires you to have a court order or police report, but you can remove \some\ information through the Direct Marketing Opt-out, though. https://www.locatepeople.org/ https://www.locatepeople.org/index.php?xpath=privacy https://locatepeople.org/index.php?xpath=lp_optout 1. Can Opt-out only by certain circumstances. https://www.jailbase.com/ https://www.jailbase.com/en/opt-out/ 1. Follow instructions on page, only under certain circumstances. https://www.justmugshots.com/ https://support.justmugshots.com/forums/21326676-Removal-Services 1. An odd one, but has shown some use. https://www.Publicrecordssearchonline.org https://www.publicrecordssearchonline.org/new/faq.php 1. Search for ‘Q: How can I remove my information from the Public Records Database?’ 2. Follow directions provided. https://twitter.com/settings/security  1. Through your profile, go to your security settings page and uncheck the box under the promoted content section. https://www.Yahoo.com https://www.info.yahoo.com/privacy/us/yahoo/opt_out/targeting/details.html https://www.search.yahoo.com/preferences/preferences? 1. Log into account. 2. Disable ads and personalized stuff. https://www.Yahoo.com/maps 1. Visit https://www.Yahoo.com/maps 2. Drag the gray icon that resembles a person (top-right) to your street (If it won’t drag, then your street has not been photographed for Yahoo.). 3. Click on ‘report image’ at the bottom-left of the screen, it will take you to a different website. 4. Click on ‘request blurring,’ and follow the directions. https://west.thomson.com/ https://static.legalsolutions.thomsonreuters.com/static/pdf/opt_out_form.pdf *Only under special circumstances* https://haveibeenpwned.com/ https://haveibeenpwned.com/OptOut 1. Check your e-mail accounts against HIBP 2. Opt-out once you copy the information to a .txt ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ===Afterword=== So ends the Paranoid’s Bible. No matter what you do, as long as you read this and the other PDFs/guides in the ‘Blue primer series’ you should be fine from citizens and most employers. You won’t be able to outsmart the government and your more tech savvy corporations, just yet. This guide and the ones found in the blue primer are meant to help you prevent spying from the average internet user—to prevent dox, stalking and identify theft. We’ll make more PDFs/guides that’ll help you lessen even more of your data footprint and lower your chances of being spied on, however, for now… worry about the citizenry hunting you down like it’s the Salem Witch trials all over again. We recommend you give the OPSEC guide a read and then checkout the Meta Data and You guide followed by Uncle Daddy’s Big Book of Deception guide. These three guides will further lessen your chances of being doxed and/or stalked besides providing a wealth of information on how to create some common canaries and red herrings.