#that gotta be the most character tags i will ever use in one post goddamn 😭😭

[shays-shack]

bunch of art for my Angel AU cuz I've had severe brainrot over it since September 🎉

1. Clara and gang (Azz, Lied, and Mysterious Bear Nigga) (Sabro)

2. Ameri and Iruma

3. Ocho and Orobas (they get two arts because I am sick in head about them and this entire AU was originally made just for them)

they make me ill.......anyway

4. extra stuff

also the cause of this brainrot is the fics my friend wrote based off my brainrot so uhhh idk read that shit or explode immediately 🔥🔥🔥🔥

[sasaranurude]

Okay. I've been playing Tokyo Debunker today, since the release happened to catch me on a day when all I'd planned to do was write fanfiction. I just finished reading the game story prologue (it was longer than expected!), so here's a review type post. If you're reading this post not having seen a single thing about this game: it's a story-based joseimuke gacha mobile game that just released globally today. It's about a girl who suddenly finds herself attending a magic school and mingling with elite, superhuman students known as ghouls. If you look in the tumblr tag for the game you'll see what appears to be a completely different game from 2019 or so: they retooled it completely midway through development, changing just about everything about it due to "escalating competition within the gaming industry."

I'll talk about how this looks like a blatant twst clone at the end.

Starting with the positive: The story is charming. I enjoyed it thoroughly the entire time and am excited to read more. The mix between visual novel segments and motion comics was really nice--it broke things up and added a lot of oomph to the action or atmospheric scenes that visual novels generally lack. I like the art in the comic parts a lot. the live2d in the visual novel parts is... passable. Tone-wise, I think the story was a little bit all over the place and would like to see more of the horror that it opened on, but I didn't mind the comedic direction it went in either. The translation is completely seamless. The characters so far all have unique voices and are just super fun and cute. Of the ones who've had larger roles in the story so far, there's not a single one I dislike. It's all fully voiced in Japanese and the acting is solid. (I don't recognize any voices, and can't seem to find any seiyuu credits, so it seems they're not big names, but they deliver nonetheless.) Kaito in particular I found I was laughing at his lines a ton, both the voicing and the writing.

He's looking for a girlfriend btw. Spreading the word.

The problem is like. The gameplay is the worst dark-pattern microtransaction-riddled bullshit I've ever seen. Hundred passive timers going at all times. Fifty different item-currencies. Trying to get you to spend absurd amounts of real world money at every turn. There's like five different indicators that take you to various real-money shop items that I don't know how to dismiss the indicator, I guess you just have to spend money, wtaf. Bajillion different interlocking systems mean you have zero sense of relative value of all the different item-currencies. I did over the course of the day get enough diamonds for one ten-pull, which I haven't used yet. Buying enough diamonds for a ten-pull costs a bit under $60 (presumably USD, but there's a chance the interface is automatically making that CAD for me--not gonna spend the money to check lmfao), with an SSR rate of 1%. BULLSHIIIIIT.

There's like a goddamn thousand-word essay explaining the dozen different types of character upgrades and equippables and equippables for the equippables!! Bad! Bad game design! That's just overcomplicating bullshit to trick people into thinking they're doing something other than clicking button to make number go up! That is not gameplay!

In terms of the actual gameplay, there is none. The battle system is full auto. There might be teambuilding, but from what I've seen so far, most of that consists of hoping you pull good cards from gacha and then clicking button to make number go up. There's occasional rhythm segments but there's no original music, it's just remixes of public domain classical music lmao. I'd describe the rhythm gameplay as "at least more engaging than twisted wonderland's," which is not a high bar

At least there's a cat in the rhythm bit.

And like, ok, I gotta remark on how derivative it is. Like I mentioned in my post earlier, this game is unabashedly aping twisted wonderland's setting and aesthetic. (That said, most of the stuff it steals from twst is magic school stuff that twst also basically stole from Harry Potter, so...?) However, it isn't exactly like twst: in this one, the characters say fuck a lot and bleed all over the place and do violence. Basically, the tone is a fair bit more adult than twst's kid-friendly vibe. (Not, like, adult adult, and I probably wouldn't even call it dark--it's still rated Teen lol. Just more adult than twst.)

Rather than just being students at magic school, the ghouls also go out into the mundane world to go on missions where they fight and investigate monsters and cryptids. Honestly, the magic school setting feels pretty tacked-on. The things that are enjoyable about this would've been just as enjoyable in about any other setting--you can tell this whole aspect was a late trend-chasing addition, lmao. So, yeah, it's blatantly copying twst to try to steal some players, but... Eh, I found myself not caring that much. Someone more (or less) into twst than me may find it grating.

Character-wise, eh, sure, yeah, they're a bit derivative in that aspect too, but it's a joseimuke game, the characters are always derivative. Thus far the writing & execution has been solid enough that I didn't care if they were tropey. If I were to compare it to something else, I'd say the relationship between the protagonist and the ghouls feels more like that of the sage and wizards in mahoyaku than anything from twst. There's some mystery in exactly what "ghouls" are and their place in this world that has me intrigued and wanting to know more about this setting and how each of the characters feels about it. I have a bad habit of getting my hopes up for stories that put big ideas on the table and then being disappointed when they don't follow through in a way that lives up to my expectations, though.

So, my final verdict: I kind of just hope someone uploads all the story segments right onto youtube so nobody has to deal with the dogshit predatory game to get the genuinely decent story lol. Give it a play just for the story if you have faith in your ability to resist dark patterns. Avoid at all costs if you know you're vulnerable to gacha, microtransactions, or timesinks.

[cookinguptales]

That last post I just reblogged was fascinating to me because it was obviously a joke but it actually lined up so well with a common PMDD symptom of mine that I was writing about it in the tags. Then I kind of thought about it again and realized OP doesn’t deserve all that in the tags of their joke post so like. I guess I’ll put those thoughts here instead.

(under a cut, cw: frank discussion of mental illness)

Like I’ll warn here that I’m about to talk about mental illness in some pretty explicit terms. I have Premenstrual Dysphoria Disorder (in addition to Major Depressive Disorder) and for the most part I have a pretty good handle on it. My depression is treatment resistant, but I did some hormonal treatments for years to help with that, my endometriosis, and my menstruation-induced EDS complications.

(Have you ever had menstrual cramps so bad that it dislocated your hips and ribs? I have! Every goddamn month lmao.)

About a year and a half ago, I had to stop taking the hormones because they were honestly making certain things worse, so I had to kind of just. Figure out other ways to deal with it. Working with a doctor, a regimen of cannabis tea and ketamine has helped a lot with the physical symptoms, and has helped some with the emotional symptoms. It’s still not perfect (still get bad days sometimes) but my suicidality is way better than it was.

(People with PMDD are apparently estimated to attempt suicide seven times more than the general AFAB population so like. I guess that’s something to keep in mind.)

That said, my ketamine regimen was fucked up recently because of some issues at the doctor’s office and uh. Well, I’m still kind of building the levels back up. The past few periods have been very rough for me. Mostly physically, but I’ve had some emotional issues, too.

This month, my PMDD has been… I guess not as severe as it was in the past, but boy is it lingering. I’ve been very jittery, very anxious, prone to bad mental loops, etc. It’s been about a week at this point, which is on the long side, but you just gotta tough it out, right?

(Don’t worry, guys, I do know when to reach out for help when symptoms get bad, and have done it before in the past.)

Anyway… one of my least favorite symptoms has come out to play and I’m Dealing with it but I hate itttt. It’s the one that the post reminded me of! And that’s the one where you feel guilty for wanting people to love you.

I think… when you’re dealing with something difficult alone, it’s very normal to fantasize about someone helping you through it. Telling you you’re not a bad person, that they love you, hugging you, etc. Normal stuff like that. I think people sometimes use fictional characters, sometimes real people who love them (like family/friends), sometimes people they make up in their head, etc. I think fantasizing about comfort is fairly normal.

But when you’re in the trenches, your mind is like No It Is Not Normal It Is Bad. I have to remind myself that like… in some ways, it’s kind of like an abusive relationship. During bad PMDD spells, my mind wants to hurt me, it wants to kill me, and it wants to separate me from my support systems. Your brain tells you that burdening others with your feelings is Bad and you are Bad for doing it.

This makes it hard to reach out for help when you need it (again, I do know how to do that, I am safe, I know that I have people who would come to my house right now if I needed them to — and failing that, I do know how emergency mental health intake works, too) but also like… it often gets to the point where you feel like a terrible person for even wanting to be loved.

Like — this is hard to explain, so here’s a sample spiral.

(cw: mental illness, suicide mention. I’m going to try and be as realistic as possible here and that might be troubling for some readers.)

I am feeling bad. I am sad and anxious and scared and feel like I am worthless. I want someone to hold me and tell me they love me. I imagine a person I like doing this. I then think — no, you are a bad person. They would not want to do this. You are putting the burden of your feelings on some unsuspecting person again. It is unfair to use a real person as a mental support. You are forcing them into a situation they did not consent to, and you are using them as a crutch. You are a bad, selfish person and they would hate you if they knew you were doing this. You are asking for too much from the people around you; how dare you ask for love and support? You are worthless and no one will love you and imagining them loving you is unfair to them and frankly very invasive. You are being parasitical right now. Stop imagining people doing things they’d never want to do, you’re such a bad person. Don’t you care about their boundaries? Of course you don’t, you always hurt people because you’re selfish and bad and no one will ever like you. So stop imagining them liking you! Just kill yourself and get it over with, etc. You are a bad thing and bad things should go away and you should stop existing. Stop writing RPF about the people you like, that’s even worse than the crime of just being you. Just kill yourself.

And honestly, this will probably go on for a couple hours and there will probably be a lot of crying. >.> It’s good to keep electrolyte solution around because dehydration just makes it worse.

I’ve dealt with MDD for almost my entire life, but PMDD is… different. There’s a sort of exhausted doneness with MDD, like you don’t want to kill yourself, necessarily, you just want to stop existing. PMDD is different. There’s a very loud, very manic aggression to it. Your brain is very actively trying to kill you. I don’t know how else to put it. It’s like being in a crowd of people all screaming at you at once until you cry, and then screaming at you for crying. There is a mob in your head and it hates you.

It is… very, very loud and very difficult to drown out. I can usually catch the warning signs and head things off before I get into a spiral. Going for a walk is good. Helps break the cycle. Creating is good, too. Makes me feel productive and useful to others, which is a whole other can of worms, but it is effective. And if all else fails, I usually weaponize my hyperfixations lmao. Start up an old video game that I know will take all my focus, or start a new tv show that I know I’ll get fannish about, whatever.

This month has been hard because, frankly, it took me by surprise. It’s a little earlier than it should be and I haven’t had to deal with it as much in the past six months, so I guess I got out of the habit. I didn’t notice that I was starting to get kind of stressed and anxious over small stuff and was beating myself up for feeling normal human emotions. This is usually the big warning sign to me. I will latch onto a negative feeling I’m having and feel very guilty about it. I scratch at it like a healing scab. Then the spirals starts. So I have to keep a watch out for that.

But… like I said, I do tend to withdraw and feel guilty about talking about these things. I feel guilty for wanting to depend on others because I feel like that’s asking too much, a miserable person like me demanding attention from people who are too good for me. And once I start withdrawing into myself and not talking to those around me, things get worse.

Like I said!!! Your brain is abusive and it wants to separate you from your support system — so it makes you feel like a bad person for even wanting a support system.

(I find that it helps, actually, to frame it like that. I can tell that my thoughts are starting to get irrational and it’s like “oh, THIS asshole is back to say mean things to me again.”)

So… idk, I’m trying to talk about it. I figure that I tagged this post appropriately and put multiple warnings on it, so anyone who is reading this wants to be here. Maybe out of curiosity, maybe out of support, maybe because they deal with these things, too. idk.

I’m basically telling my mean brain that fuck you, it’s good to talk about my feelings and no one hates me for it.

Because… this is the big thing… I was thinking about that one Tumblr post… the one that was like “the me in your head is nice to you, right?”

I want the me in your head to be so nice to you. I want the me in your head to hold you and tell you you’re a good person and that I love you. Even if I don’t know you. I want the me in your head to be so damn comforting.

I love the idea of being a comfort to people. That’s… why I write so much of why I write, I think. There’s nothing that chokes me up like finding out I’ve managed to comfort someone that I don’t even know. Is there anything more beautiful than comforting and supporting others in this bitch of a world?

NO we gotta be kind.

So… if I want the me in your head to be so, so kind, why do I feel so guilty for wanting the you in my head to be nice to me, too? Why do I feel like I am so innately unlovable that even fantasizing about someone loving me could stain them somehow? Like I will stain their clothes with my own awfulness.

I DON’T. I don’t feel that way. I have been doing so much better lately. I have been reaching out to people and doing fun things and spending time with people and thinking about loving people and them loving me back. I’ve thought about people loving me!!! And I’ve started to have the creeping hope that it could happen! That I am worthy of love.

Guys, I’ve been better. I know that all sounds like not much, but it’s been so easy for me to convince myself that no one will ever love me because I’m sick, I’m disabled, I’m unattractive, I’m unkind, I’m cringe, I’m annoying, I’m selfish, etc. It’s been so easy for me to find a million excuses for why I, out of all the people on this earth, will never be loved.

So… feeling hope that that’s not true is actually a very big thing for me, and something that I’ve been delighting in recently.

All the things in my head are fake and mean and… you know, hormones. That’s all.

Idk, this was meant to be a discussion of one small part of PMDD but I guess it ended up being a ramble about a lot of things. I’ll admit that it’s much more difficult for me to be focused and eloquent when I’m dealing with these symptoms. I had a moment where I wanted to apologize to anyone still reading this, but — instead I’ll thank you for spending your time with my words. For whatever reason you decided to do it, for whatever reason you’re still here, I appreciate that you did it.

I want the version of you in my head to be nice. And I want to thank you for being nice. And I want to be nice to you, too.

In conclusion

Now I’m gonna go take my medication and be quiet for a while.

[silvernmoonshipping-is-love]

What's your favorite creepypasta out of all of them? (Sorry if this question has an obvious answer I'm just curious.)

(btw love ur art)

Oh my god, I'm so terribly sorry for not answering this since forever.

I think people noticed my activity on here keeps dwindling more and more, there's just too much going on in my personal life right now, both literally and mentally. Trust me, I wanna create content again, I just don't know when.

But first of all, thank you for this ask and thank you for the compliment, I apologize for not having created any more art in probably months at this point-

And while the answer may be obvious, I always love getting to gush over my favourite boys. I could of course go the easy route and just say Ben and Silver are my faves... But I need to be honest with myself.

I think the posts, the headcanons, the tags and all make it obvious that while my favourite used to be Lost Silver it slowly evolved into it being Ben. And I still stand by that. He isn't only my favourite Creepypasta, he is probably my biggest comfort character and one of my most favourite characters in general.

I don't even fully know why, my neurodivergent brain just decided to hyperfixate on him and hasn't let go of him since. He is in there 24/7 and better pay his goddamn rent soon-

He is lovable, he is so fun to design and draw and make headcanons for, he seems like a great MC to write for, he is genuinely such a nice person despite all he went through, he's so incredibly tragic, like I legit still think he is the saddest Creepypasta ever and you can not change my mind, I just wanna hug him and let him know everything will be fine. But I'm also thirsty for angst, so sucks to be him I guess, lol.

He just... makes me genuinely happy, but don't worry, his boyfri- I mean Silver is still very close up as the second most important Gamingpasta in my heart.

Silver has always been sort of an inspiration to me and a giver of hope which I probably show in my writing, like I often think I may kinda be a traitor to Silver fans or many SilvernMoon shippers, because most seem to care more for him and that's totally fine and cool; I just feel like a faker almost for it lol, but I still love him a lot, I just gotta acknowledge that I want Ben to be happy too, and even think he needs love and comfort more (That's right, I said it).

I'm really sorry if my rambles make no more sense or are becoming incomprehensible. Bottom line, my faves are Ben and Silver, but if being 100% honest my absolute fave is Ben, he's just a funky lil bean.

Stan Ben Drowned/Benjamin Lawman for clear skin!

PS: Also honorable mention to my boy Liu. Idc if he isn't written the best apparently (Tho of course I agree the DID was handled badly and the one thing I would change about him), I find his potential great and him very underrated. Sure is a shame his brother is one of the worst ones to ever exist and the fandom just needs to staple him to said brother instead of letting Liu be his own character. But not the point of the ask lmao.

[princeanxious]

What art are you most proud of? And please show us a pic if you can! <3

Not gonna lie, this was actually p hard to answer. I’m honestly proud of any piece I get done, especially any full body, full color, full background pieces, and I refuse to let myself out-right hate anything that I draw in general now-a-days, unfinished or no. I draw for fun, always have, so I try not to put too much worry on how good something looks so long as it gets my idea across in a way that I like, or that I tried?? (And ik being proud of a piece doesnt have to tie into what the end result looks like, im just covering that base) I looked through all of my recent digital art on my ipad(that i’ve had what, 3-4 years at this point?) and found myself about just as happy with each finished piece-

-Except one. There is one piece that I forget about constantly but I’m honestly super proud of the amount of effort it had put in to reach the end result. It probably sees a number of glances infrequently(due to my sporatic activity on said blog) but isnt posted to this blog’s art tag.

It’s the blog banner I drew for my @thelostguardianau fic, of the(at the time) whole cast in the au. You can find the post to reblog it from here but i’m also adding it below for reference. (* and honestly I’ll mention every other art piece in this au posted to it’s blog stands at having this same proudness, as each individual characters complicated design fed into this big banner, each one having a giant set of uniquely drawn wings, complex body markings, and unique clothing and features. And I would not have been able to complete this banner without having those singular character chart pieces finished first, except for Thomas’s design, who has yet to be posted for ✨reasons✨)

This fricking Banner was and still is(for now, *wink*) the most ambitious piece I’ve managed to finish. It took me so long, my wrist hated me, my ipad hated me, my ipencil hated me, medibang hated me, this piece pushed the limits of the poor app. Every time I try and open this piece up on the app it takes a solid couple seconds to open, save, and close.

From sketching to lining every single character, to having to uniquely match up Their Wing Sizes and Heights, because Guardians are fucking Tall, so Wing size and Height size was hell to calculate and portray. Why, you might ask?

Because I was limited to the proportions that would actually fit into a tumblr mobile banner. Which, funfact, is much smaller than you’d think!

I had to make sure they’d all fit, wings and all. And they didnt fcking want to. But I made it fit, because I wanted a full body + wings cast banner and goddamn it that was going to happen. And I did. And I lost a fuck-off amount of detail-space for it.

Coloring it wasn’t exactly difficult, but I will once again point back to this app hating this piece and it draining my battery because of it. I work in layers. My lineart will have 5-6 different layers in color before I combine them and set the hue to black, but I still keep my lineart seperate in that each character has their own lineart, and the background lineart is seperate.

I had their lineart, and probably still do, seperated into Seven different layers, one per character, each one w/ an extra masking layer for their wing glow. Each character got their own folder for colors, and had multiple layers for each colored section: clothing, skin, skin blush + eye whites, hair, wings, body markings, marking glow. And then there was the background layers, and the glowing affects, ect. The whole piece stands at having about 80 total layers having been used over the course of making it.

So yeah, Medibang does not like this piece when I try to open it. xD

But really, setting aside fighting and babying technology thats being pushed close to its limit, the real pride comes from the fact that this piece has Seven fully colored, near-full body characters drawn, all touching and interacting and accurate to the scale that I made. It is the most amount of characters in one piece that I’ve ever drawn, colored, and finished, and I’m pretty fricken proud of it.

Which makes it all the more daunting that said banner is going to get an upgrade, because it’s a Character Cast Banner after all, and its going to have four more fully designed and full winged characters added into it.

And by upgrade, I mean I get to redraw the whole dang thing. Because I gotta rearrange ✨everyone’s✨ positions. And at this point, the only way thats possible is by starting over.

wish me luck on that. o_o;

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

AIGHT Y’ALL I wasn’t tagged but I’m doing this anyways because f u c k  i t

It's the year 2021 and you're obsessed with The Karate Kid. How are you feeling?

Deadasss weird as fuck, my dude. Like...out of all the things I could’ve predicted happening in our lord’s year 2021, it definitely was NOT getting hyperfixated on a hammy gay ship with a punk and a nerd from a goddamn karate soap opera. And yet...here we are??? I will never understand hyperfixations, my guy. But I’ve met a lot of really cool people in this fandom, so I can’t really complain.

Did you grow up with TKK or are you new to the series?

I have never seen a single Karate Kid movie in my entire life. When I was a kid, it looked kinda dumb so I never got into it XD But then I saw my roommate watching Cobra Kai on Youtube Red one day (he has every streaming service known to man) and I was hooked. And...here I am!

We gotta do the basics. Favorite character:  

Literally EVERYONE except for Kreese, Yasmine, Kyler, and Tory, sorry stans

Okay but if we gotta pick, Johnny Lawrence is my Problematic Fave. Also I love my boy Daniel, he’s trying his best!!! And Amanda LaRusso, we stan a queen!!!

Among the kids, definitely Miguel, with Demetri as a close second. I also love Sam, Aisha, Moon, and Hawk (pre- and post-Bastardization Arc, anyways XD)!

Favorite ship:  

Take a look at my username and take a WILD FUCKING GUESS lmao Yes it’s Eli/Demetri because DUH, every interaction they have is so fucking gay and Eli fucking saved him!!! And came back to him!!! And betrayed the world’s most terrifying dojo with a WAR CRIMINAL SENSEI all for Demetri!!! And how Demetri was willing to forgive him for everything at the drop of a hat because he always had faith there was still good in his best friend??? That’s TRUE LOVE motherfuckers. Please let them kiss in Season 4. I will sell you all of my limbs. Sam/Miguel is a close second because they’re cute as shit and it’s just so lovely to see two people so unapologetically smitten with each other. They are in LOVE, and I will RIOT if they break up again!!! Keep Sam and Miguel together 2k21!!!

Underrated character:

SAMANTHA LARUSSO!!! The amount of hate my girl gets for acting like a normal teenager and fucking up occasionally JUST like the rest of the cast makes me want to start punching things. She cares SO MUCH about her friends!!! And she loves the shit out of Miguel!!! She hasn’t always been the best friend but you know what??? Neither has Hawk, and we still forgave his ass!!! Also LET HER BE FEMININE but also kick utter ass, my god!!! Femininity should not be synonymous with being weak, y’all! ALSO DEMETRI, like yes, he likes to complain and occasionally run his mouth, but guess what else he likes to do??? Never give up on the love of his life his best friend Eli Moskowitz and refuse to lose faith in him no matter how much of a little shit he’s become, and I for one think that’s very badass of him. Also the way he takes care of Eli pre-Cobra Kai in his own snarky bastard way makes me absolutely Weak and needs more appreciation. Like the dude has charisma and COULD have probably made other friends and left Eli behind if he wanted, but did he??? No, he wants the weepy loser with the lip scar in the polo shirts and dorky sweaters and will protect him as much as his wimpy ass is able!!!

Underrated ship (don’t say therapy, lol):  

Among the adults, Daniel/Amanda!!! Like maybe I just don’t watch that much tv, but it seems kinda rare to me to see a happily married hetero couple, and it’s just nice to see a married couple who genuinely love each other and where there’s not like...lingering resentment or some shit. I feel like this ship gets overshadowed by Lawrusso a lot (which like--okay, fair!!! Daniel and Johnny do have a ridiculous amount of chemistry, and the gay undertones are undeniable, so I get it), and it makes me kinda sad. I do love Lawrusso, but I don’t like when Amanda has to get her heart broke for it to happen, you feel? Among the kids, honestly YasMoon. Like I really love the idea of Yasmine trying to better herself because of Moon’s influence on her and because Moon like...inspires her to be a better person, I guess? With their pretty strong friendship, it just makes more sense to me for Yasmine to get a redemption arc through Moon than through Demetri. ALSO girls DO often pull the whole “mean girl” shtick to cover up being closeted lesbians, and Moon IS canonically bi, so it could work!!! I just think this one could be a really interesting Friends to Lovers take, and could make a really nice coming-out arc for Yas. And MoonPiper too, honestly!!! Like they only got 5 seconds of screentime so I understand WHY it’s underrated, but I still love what we DID get and loved that there was a canon gay ship (even if only for 1 scene lmao). I’m really excited to potentially see more of them in Season 4!!! Please, I’m begging!!!

Wax On, Wax Off or Sweep the Leg?

Sweep the Leg because it will always be deeply hilarious to me how Demetri took note of the first move Eli ever used on him and spent presumably weeks perfecting it OUT OF SPITE just to get him back with it at the soccer game MONTHS later. Just goes to show how OBSESSED Demetri is with Eli and their little karate rivalry which is just NOT straight, I’m sorry

Which of Daniel’s dumb little outfits is your favorite?

There’s something so funny about this pretentious little fuck walking around in fancy suits once he becomes a #SuccessfulBusinessman, and still occasionally trying to do karate in a full-ass suit (take THAT, Tom Cole’s boba!!!) I’m also a big fan of how he looks in his gi with his little headband. Still killing that look as a 40-50-something!!!

Character from the films you most want to return, who’s not Terry Silver:

Tbh I have still never seen a single Karate Kid movie (they took them off of Netflix, RIP), so...I don’t really care if they bring anyone else back??? I’m invested in the characters we already have in the show, I don’t need some rando from the movies to make a cameo to have a good time XD The only character I really wanted them to bring back was Ali, and they already did, so like...I’m good??? That’s all I really needed, I can die in peace now XD

Scene that lives in your head rent-free:

Basically any fluffy Elimetri scene, but 5 in particular: ~Miguel first meeting Eli and Demetri at the lunch table, and Eli looking at Demetri like he hung every goddamn star in the sky ~Demetri going off at a terrifying, “unhinged” karate sensei on the first day of Cobra Kai because he made fun of Eli’s lip and Demetri is not about that shit ~ELI STEALING DEMETRI’S NACHO AND SMIRKING AT HIM, LIKE EXCUSE ME SIR PLEASE BE A LITTLE LESS HOMOSEXUAL IN FRONT OF YOUR GIRLFRIEND ~Eli yanking Demetri onstage during Valley Fest to hold a board, and Demetri being visibly like...extremely turned on when Eli breaks said board ~ELI SAVING DEMETRI DURING THE CHRISTMAS FIGHT, ELI APOLOGIZING, DEMETRI AND ELI KICKING COBRA ASS TOGETHER AKSBDCUWYVCBU

Will Anthony LaRusso ever be relevant?

I hope not! He’s kind of a funny meme character to pop up now and again but I don’t think he deserves a serious plotline when there are so many more interesting characters to follow.

You live in The Valley and are forced into the karate gang war. Which dojo do you join?

Miyagi-Do because Cobra Kai would eat me alive. Also I’d probably straight up get stuck and die in that cement mixer, if I even made it that far XD Besides, being salty that your friend who you have a crush on likes martial arts better than you and starting martial arts to impress them but also being too lazy to join anything TOO intense is a Big Mood and I am certainly not speaking from personal experience here, no sirree

What’s your training montage song?

"Shut Up and Drive” by Rihanna for a weight-training and bicep-flexing montage, “Whatever It Takes” by Imagine Dragons for a more intense punching-and-kicking-shit montage. I don’t know why this is, I just feel it in my heart.

It’s the crossover event of the century! Which TV show are you combining with Cobra Kai for an hour-long Saturday night special?

*Briefly panics because I don’t actually watch that much TV and most of the stuff I do watch is fantasy/sci fi shit that absolutely would not work for a CK crossover*

Hmmmm okay but ACTUALLY

You know what would be fucking funny as hell would be an It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia crossover. Allow me to elaborate: ~The Gang goes to LA on vacation during the height of the Karate Dojo Wars. They literally can get barely anything done without all these goddamn karate-fighting teenagers getting in the way. ~They are all very annoyed by this. Even the most obscure of tourist attractions is eventually intercepted by karate fights. ~Mac tries to join Cobra Kai because he sees all this karate fighting on, and wants to unquestionably prove both his badassery and masculinity. Both Johnny and Kreese are like “Wtf are you doing here? Aren’t you like 30?” ~Mac gets a planet-sized crush on Johnny after all of 5 minutes and endlessly gushes to the gang about him. The gang mercilessly roast him about this and about how much of a pathetic loser with his life together in no way whatsoever Johnny sounds like. They proceed to have exactly 0 self awareness about this. ~The Waitress is in town visiting family or something, and Charlie is stalking her, as per usual. However, every time he’s about to go up and talk to her, a pack of battling Miyagi-Dos and Cobra Kais throwing punches and kicks everywhere blocks his path. One times, Mac is among one of these packs and Charlie is like “???? He didn’t get kicked out of that teen karate dojo yet???” ~Seeing how much the Kids These Days seem to like fighting, Charlie drops by a local high school to try and sell Fight Milk to the kids doing karate. Only Kyler and Brucks buy into it, and subsequently get the entire West Valley High wrestling team sick. Charlie is inevitably arrested, as Counselor Blatt thinks he’s selling the kids drugs. ~Dennis makes a plan to have sex with every hot chick he can in Los Angeles. He meets Ali on a dating app post-divorce, and inevitably tries to bang her. It doesn’t work. ~Frank crashes the rental car, and inevitably the gang ends up at one of Daniel’s dealerships. Dee quickly takes a liking to Daniel and is like “Watch, assholes--Imma homewreck this guy’s marriage.” She starts frequenting the dealerships to attempt to flirt with Daniel, until one day she walks in on him having sex with Johnny in a back room and she’s like “Is that the guy from Mac’s goddamn dojo?!?!” ~Dennis, of course, tries to sleep with Amanda. Amanda is not having it, and rebukes him in the most snarky, Amanda-esque way possible. Dennis is just like “Oh not AGAIN--the women in this goddamn diva city have too high of standards!” ~Later on, the gang is at the beach and Dennis spots the blonde lady he went out on an ill-fate date with, and decides to give it another shot--that is, until he sees her go up and kiss another woman and he’s like “IS THAT THE LADY FROM THE CAR DEALERSHIP??? STUPID-KARATE-KICK-COMMERCIAL’S WIFE?!? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.” ~Dee complains to Dennis about her lack of luck getting laid, and Dennis is just like “Oh come ON, is everyone in Los Angeles gay???” Smash cut to Hawk and Demetri having sex, Moon and Piper making out, Bert and Nate holding hands, Chris and Mitch doing oral, and Amanda, Ali, and Carmen having a threesome. ~Frank tries to scam Kreese into buying cheaply-made karate equipment for his dojo. The gang ends up having to leave LA because Kreese is quite literally plotting all of their murders.

For tagging, uuuuhhhhhh @jackonthelongwalk @soe-leo @max-eagle-fang @cc-tinslebee @backawayfromthegay @asphodel-storm do the thing, if y’all haven’t yet!

[who-talks-first]

Okay I'm having trouble finding everyone's posts from Friday. But I just watched chapter 9 and I have some thoughts.

Opening the episode with Din saying he doesn't gamble then ending it with him making a massive gamble was interesting. Although I genuinely don't think he ever does anything he doesn't believe he can do.

The fights in this episode are amazing. Just stunning:

The fight at the arena. The Child ducking when he sees the Birds activate. "I'm not." Really. Din, stop being so goddamn fucking hot, I'm trying to watch the damn show! The whole dangling the gangster part. "You won't die by my hand." (one of the best parts of the character Din Djarin is he is both viciously ruthless and honorable to a fault. I love it!)

The fighting at the end. Both men flying in sync to kill the beast. The Raiders and townsfolk grudgingly working together. But it would have worked better just leaving the loaded bantha in the valley, luring the best out, and detonating it. Fewer civilian deaths but what do I know, I wasn't raised in the fighting corps. And god at the end when Din soars out of the monster's mouth! I that was how the episode would end as soon as I saw the explosives. But still so fucking cool! Is there a name for that trope? I call it the Hercules.

Can we talk for a second about how Din looks in this ep? The strides, the poses and posture. He exudes so much bde that it physically hurts me. Clearly a lot of that is Mandalorian in nature, if those images of Boba Fett from the comics tell us anything (Fett sitting spread in his ship and Din doing it on the wagon at Sorgan have p much the same energy). Just looking fine as hell through the whole thing, even covered in deadly dragon stomach acid.

And can we talk about how much he says this episode? He explains the Tuskens' behavior, translates, plans, barters, smooches doggies, etc. He talks a lot. And I think that's interesting. Din has this reputation as being awkward in social situations and quiet. And like, it's one thing feeling shy around the beautiful widow who's hitting on you. But he says what he means clearly and more or less concisely, including some one-liners and sarcasm. I think he could be described as "laconic" (my character does describe him as such in the thing I'm writing), which means they use as few words as possible to get their point across. Din has no hesitation in speaking, he just prefers to only speak when he has something to say, if that makes sense.

So happy to see Aunt Peli! And Din being like "eh let them work" That's what we call growth.

The casting. I nearly lost my shit when Timothy Olyphant was under the helmet, looking like a whole ass meal. Like that is the most flattering haircut and beard combo I've ever seen on him. Don't @me but he could get it. And poor typecast Leguizamo. Still great tho. He was fun little asshole.

I love when this show doubles down on the western themes:

Vanth's name, accent, role, and general appearance all line up with a small town wild west sheriff. Just showing up and saving the town, so they're like, you're the Lone Ranger now! Olyphant has played western roles before, including voicing The Spirit of the West (an avatar of the legends and ideals of the wild west modeled on Clint Eastwood's western characters) in the animated film Rango (a lot of the Mandalorian's aesthetic comes from Eastwood's movies).

The Mandalorian theme but softly strummed on a Spanish (nylon string) guitar is very evocative of a border town.

The tuskens represent an Indian tribe. The abandoned mining town. The mysterious stranger who comes to town and saves it. Vanth and Din nearly have a quickdraw shootout! The child is hiding in a spittoon for chrissakes!

It really echoes the 7 Samurai theme of chapter 4. I know it's an overlapping, repeating theme in western film. I guess I was surprised to see it again so quickly.

I don't know how I feel about Din speaking Tusken. Signing was one thing. But I just giggled uncomfortably the whole time feeling it was kinda silly (and I had assumed the reason he signed was because humans couldn't speak Tusken). Was that our big hero, heartthrob, and favorite actor Mr. Pascal sitting in the studio making those noises? Rrrhehh rheh rrhehh! I dunno I'm just. Reeling.

Isn't interesting that Din would annihilate the entire populace of Jawas without batting an eye, but he would do almost anything to protect the Sand People? I know there's something to that, about marginalized/eugenicized groups versus like colonialism and whatever vulture like construct you would attribute to the Jawas. But I'm not smart enough to articulate it.

Okay, so the obvious: Boba Fett. Really shocked to see his armor on someone else. I'd already seen the casting of Morrison, so I wasn't like, "is he dead?" and I knew right away this hick didn't take it off him. I wonder if the Jawas stunned him and removed it. Either way, there's going to be hell to pay. I can't wait to see Din and Boba interact; I wonder how they'll respond to each other. And even though Fett should be in his early 40s (I think) he really looks like hell. I mean, I know he's seen some shit. But I wonder what's been up with him in the last decade or so.

Some stuff I thought I noticed, but I need y'all to help me confirm:

Was that Anakin's podracer engine?

Was that C-3PO graffitied on the wall in the dirty city?

Were we supposed to recognize R5?

There's a couple others but I forgot em. I gotta watch it again.

Some questions:

What was the spherical thing the Tusken Raiders recovered from the beast's remains? The scene mirrored the Jawas and the mudhorn's TSUGA! Tsuga tsuga! Tsuuuga! But that didn't look like an egg. If I didn't know better I would swear it was a pearl. (which almost makes sense if you take into account that this guy eats dirt for a living and could have an organ or extra stomach in there like those gross hard balls they used to pull out of ox bellies) Or was it mentioned earlier and I didn't catch it? There was a lot going on.

What are the sand doggies? They're so cute! And that totally establishes our mans as a dog person. Writers, start your fics!

I'm a bit confused about the town's history. How have the people survived for so long with the beast there? Was it the Krayt dragon that wiped it literally off the map? How does the slaving mining guild fit in there?

It really looks in chapter 4 that those krill are native (it's not explicitly stated tho). If no one even knows where Sorgan is and it doesn't have a big export economy, how do these people in the middle of buttfuck nowhere have spotchka?

On that note, how did that city gangster hear about Fett/Vanth? I mean, I dig that he's a collector of beskar'gam, but like, that's still way out there.

The jingling spurs sound in chapter 5 is deliberately obvious when that mysterious figure comes upon Fennec Shand. Can we assume that's Cobb Vanth there? Because clearly, Fett has been without his armor for a while. If it was Vanth, what did he do with her? I don't believe for a second that she's dead. He's not a bounty hunter and he wouldn't have any idea she was valuable since the Guild had abandoned Tatooine. Barter for help/transportation /goods/labor /etc? Also, if it was Vanth, did he witness the whole thing? If so, he knows who Din is. Maybe knows Toro. I dunno. Lots of thoughts. Did he just stumble upon her while traveling back to his village? I forgot the name already lol Mos Pelegrino?

Okay it's nearly 4 am. I genuinely can't remember if I had anything else to say. Please continue to tag your spoilers cuz I will again not get to view the episode until after y'all do next week. But until then, please come yell at me about our favorite show and space boyfriend. I like crazy theories too.

Love y'all. 😘😘😘

[ssaic-jareau]

HEY YOU!

i've been trying to find the right words and stuff to explain how proud i am, how in awe i am, how absolutely stunned i am at all the work, tali has put into this universe. and in all honesty, i doubt I'd ever find the words.

very, VERY early on in ajf (round about the time i found out tali wrote a book, yes that left me in awe once again), tali mentioned that she hated plot more than anything. world building and characters on the other hand were a whole different story, she loved it, she said most of what she's ever written was just world building and rough ideas of characters and then she got bored because *john mulaney groan* plot.

!!! BREAKING NEWS !!!

You've built a world similar adjacent to cm canon (and it still feels like a whole different universe), you've had better plot ideas than cm screenwriters, you've explored the characters so much more in depth than cm canon AND GODDAMN YOU JUST DO THE SHOW A WHOLE LOT BETTER.

I've got to do an ode to mean it, because that is what got us talking day in and day out in the first place. And honestly, THAT was such a great day, I remember pulling up my notepad on my phone while reading the VERY rough draft of mean it and taking copious notes TO YELL AT YOU LATER IN THE DAY (for me).

AND NOW YOU'RE AT WHAT ??? A HUNDRED AND TWO??? (because this post is a little late)

Y'all the amount of work Tali puts into A Joyful Future has me constantly in awe. She does so much research, she's gotta rewatch to see if the transcripts has the right person speaking, and let's not even mention how many times she had to watch the slave of duty, because that right there is a WHOLE different kind of strength. She's created penmanship for almost everyone in the universe, she's created graphics for special moments (yes, I'm looking at you on paper), she's recorded audios for said fics, she's EVEN built the house (mind you, there's an actual house she's found in VA (that meets her standards)) on sims (like???? the TALENT™), she's crafted OC's like it's nothing, she's written ONE HUNDRED AND TWO pieces already, and she's got 107 pieces planned.

Talent really just oozes out of her.

I am constantly honoured whenever tali asks me to help her with a certain plot hole she's dug for herself.

BUT

to be a co-author on meraki, the one hundredth piece for a joyful future, WORDS CAN'T EXPLAIN HOW HONOURED I AM!!! It's ALREADY one of my favourite pieces we've (holy shit, WE) written. i get GIDDY seeing the parts I've written be there (and i had some, yes some, restraint to steer clear from the google doc once i got the time it would be posted) and the EXTRA bits.

+++

tali, sweet wonderful tali.

@winterscaptain

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, reaching 100 fics in a world YOU BUILT has me BLOWN AWAY!

you're so talented (i mean, it's your tag for a reason) and i never have enough coherent thoughts to appreciate your talent (so you mostly just get rambles).

i know i'm behind on commentary (but i will catch up), until then here's a post about how much i love and appreciate all you do for every one of us who enjoys your writing.

i love you.

[hunxi-guilai]

So I'm very curious (and it has been a while since I've read any Cosmere, to my everlasting shame) - you said in the tags of a post that Xiao Xingchen and Dalinar Kholin hit a lot of the same character buttons for you. I was wondering if you'd be willing to go into more detail about that?

(in reference to the tags on this post)

oh man oh man anon, I would love to but I super cannot because that has mega Oathbringer spoilers

by which I mean I will happily keyboard smash, hang on a tick, let me just throw it under a cut

please note!!!! if you think you might ever read Brandon Sanderon’s Stormlight Archive!!!! stay away from this post!!!! because Stormlight Archive is incredible and part of the reason is because Oathbringer takes it onto a whole new level oh my god and you shouldn’t spoil it for yourself!

I’m SERIOUS we’re getting into spoilers now. It’s not too late to turn back and experience Stormlight Archive for the masterpiece it is

you still with me?

all right we’re doing this

so here’s the thing about Dalinar Kholin -- for books one and two, he is the epitome of the wise and capable leader; he’s reasonable, passionate, moral, experienced, even-handed, righteous to a fault, and actively trying to model himself off of the Way of Kings, aka the in-universe textbook on ‘how to be a good ruler/decent person 101.’ He follows through on his promises; he throws himself into battle; he fights for the downtrodden, the surrounded, the hopeless; he uses his goddamn Shardblade to dig a latrine; he refuses to play the backstabbing, deceptive games of politics and intrigue. He’s a really good dude who’s trying his goddamned best in a world rapidly going to shit.

And then in book three, you find out who he was before the events of Stormlight Archive. You find out his history as a bloodthirsty, brutal warlord; the long, long laundry list of war crimes he’s committed; his frankly astonishing lack of moral compass. He spends his youth and adulthood honing himself into a weapon, and wreaks complete and total destruction wherever Gavilar points him. He becomes an alcoholic, a terrible father, a person who has to either fight or drink in order to stay sane -- two things that are becoming increasingly less sustainable as Alethkar enters a time of peace. 

He burns an entire city to the ground with everyone still in it, including the best person in his life.

To be fair, Dalinar finds this out about himself around the same time we do; we find out that his guilt came so close to destroying him that he elected to make a deal with the Nightwatcher to take away his pain long enough for him to function, to grow and develop and move beyond his thoroughly reprehensible past.

It’s a redemption arc unlike any redemption arc I’ve ever read, and it’s a redemption arc with so much power because when Dalinar has his memories returned to him? It’s supposed to break him -- Odium absolutely intends for it to break him -- and it nearly does. He almost gives up, right then and there, during the Battle of Thaylen Field.

But he doesn’t. He takes responsibility for his past actions. He doesn’t expect redemption. He doesn’t take the easy way out, for all that Odium whispers to him. All he can do -- all any of them can do, really -- is try to be better.

Give me your pain, Odium says. Give up the guilt, the shame, the internal anguish. Relinquish responsibility for all of the horrible things he’s done.

No, Dalinar says. You cannot have my pain. Because it’s his, he owns it, and to give it up would be the most unforgivable act he could commit against the ghosts of every good and innocent person he’s killed.

For a series that is so preoccupied with the journey every living person must go through (this post isn’t about Kaladin but I gotta yell for a sec. KALADIN FUCKING STORMBLESSED. ONE MORE TRY. okay I’m done), it means so much when you read this:

“The most important step a man can take. It's not the first one, is it?It's the next one. Always the next step, Dalinar.”

So when I watch the Yi City Arc and see Xiao Xingchen confront a similar reveal about his actions? When Xiao Xingchen learns that the good he thought he was doing, that he thought he had done, was actually built on a mass of bodies and blood and brutality that he wrought with his own hand, his own sword? Xiao Xingchen fucking breaks, the way Dalinar broke. But Dalinar had the time and space and the support from Navani (real talk though, Navani Kholin is the true MVP of Stormlight Archive) to slowly pick up the pieces and put himself back together again (If I must fall, he says, I will rise each time a better man). Xiao Xingchen has none of that. The one person he had left in the world is dead at his hands. The only other person he thought he could trust was the mastermind of this entire affair. A-Qing, he can only hope, has run fast and run far, and it’s his fault anyway that he let her come so close to harm. 

Xiao Xingchen is manipulated so exquisitely and brilliantly into a position of abject despair that a self-immolation, a self-shattering is the only path he can see towards -- god, not even atonement, just a way to put an end to the sheer anguish he feels. And because he can, because Shuanghua is right there and there’s no one to stop him, not even himself, he takes that way out. 

This is why Xiao Xingchen is a tragedy and Dalinar Kholin is a triumph -- Xiao Xingchen ends his story at its lowest point, for very understandable reasons, but in doing so he ends his journey. He gives up the possibility of ever coming back from this, while Dalinar, in a feat of immense willpower pretty much unknowable to mortal men, refuses. Dalinar accepts the worst about himself, but refuses to let his journey end there. Dalinar still believes in himself, whereas Xiao Xingchen loses all hope.

Would I love an entire novel-length AU about a Xiao Xingchen who survives Yi City and has to negotiate the complex relationships between guilt, morality, and self-worth? Absolutely. Do I love him regardless? You bet your ass I do. 

But there we have it -- why I love Dalinar Kholin and Xiao Xingchen, and why they live side-by-side on the same shelf in my brain.

[starker-stories]

An Accord (WIS), Chapter 10

Okay, let's try this again.

I posted this chapter Friday, like it was supposed to be, and then found an absolutely massive amount of serious mistakes. So I deleted it and spent the day fixing them.

So here's Chapter 10, take 2...

This fic is on a weekly update schedule. Every Friday.

Tumblr Chapter Links: ch1, ch2, ch3, ch4, ch5, ch6, ch7, ch8, ch9, ch10, ch11, ch12, ch13 AO3 Chapter Links: ch1, ch2, ch3, ch4, ch5, ch6, ch7, ch8, ch9, ch10, ch11, ch12, ch13

Tags: Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Post-Spider-Man: Homecoming, Anal Sex, Oral Sex, Polyamory Negotiations, Polyamory, Cheating, Past Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers, Domestic Nightmare Tony Stark, Reconciliation, Nightmares, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, WinterIronSpider, Happy Ending, Clothed Sex, Domesticity, Peter Parker is legal age in the state of New York, College Student Peter Parker, Takes place about 2 years after Civil War. Closeted Character

Summary: “My boyfriends are super-villains,” Peter said giggling. “I’m the only pure innocent one in this place.”  ——————————————————————————————

Chapter 10: Brooklyn

“I hate being the only person in this house that gets hungry,” Peter said, breaking their post-kiss snuggling session.

Bucky laughed. “I’ll cook.”

“Menus. By. The fridge. I am not waiting for one of Pretty’s delicious, but time consuming, Depression meals.”

Bucky climbed out of bed and started pulling his shirt on.

Tony shrugged. “If you want,” he said, climbing out of bed and not bothering to put his clothes back on. Bucky didn’t either.

Peter pulled his jeans on. “Not all of us are exhibitionists, Tony.”

“My body is a fuckin’ gift and you are blessed to see it,” he answered as he headed to the kitchen. To get the menus.

Bucky raced past him for the bedroom door, poking him in the stomach as he passed. “My body is a fuckin’ gift. You need to work out with me.”

“I’m going on fifty,” Tony defended.

“I’m in my second century. I’m cooking. I can only eat so much Asian food and pizza in a month.”

“Don’t let the teenager order dinner. He refuses to let any restaurant that doesn’t normally deliver make an exception for the billionaire in the house.”

“It’s not fair,” Peter argued, speeding past both of them using his spider abilities. He settled on the kitchen stool, waiting to see who would get to the kitchen next: Tony to the menu drawer or Bucky to the stove.

“You are depriving whatever poor waiter Molly sticks with bringing me dinner of a ridiculously huge tip,” Tony said, tossing the menu for Marea on the counter. “Touch that stove, Bucky, and I swear…”

Bucky picked up the menu. “So what’s Molly’s Place have to offer?”

Tony sputtered. “I’d tell Michael what you said, but I value my permanent reservation at his restaurant too much. It’s Marea and it’s the best restaurant in the city.”

Bucky looked at the menu. “Billionaire, right?” he asked, grinning.

“Leave me a few pennies in the bank account,” Tony said.

“Il branzino, il caulini e l'antipasto, il di manzo.”

Tony’s eyebrows headed for the ceiling.

“I’m fluent in Italian, Spanish, Catalan, French, German, Finnish, Hungarian, Romanian, Czech, Serbian, Russian, Chechen, Chinese, Korean, Vietnamese, and Arabic. Oh yeah, and English. All accentless except for English. Now that I’m me again, I can’t get the Brooklyn out of it.”

Tony hooked his arm around Bucky’s neck and kissed him. “I can live with the Brooklyn,” he said, happy that Bucky wouldn’t ever speak unaccented English again.

“And I was impressed by your Italian, French, Spanish, Russian, and Chinese!” Peter said.

Bucky shrugged. “He wasn’t involved in the overthrow of as many governments as I was.”

Peter burst out laughing, then caught himself. “I shouldn’t find that funny, huh?”

Tony chuckled. “Yeah, Pete. It’s fuckin’ hilarious.” He winked at Bucky. “Maybe not as many, but it’s a non-zero number.”

“You’re both awful!” Peter said, a smile still on his lips. “Wait. You didn’t,” he asked Tony, more seriously.

“Sometimes privatizing world peace is a less than honorable pursuit. And do you think the same people are running Afghanistan as were before my visit there? Not an official government on that one, but it counts.”

“Sorry. That mess was my fault,” Bucky said sheepishly.

“I’m sure he did a lot for Russia there, Pretty, but not arm the damn Taliban. That would be Howard and then me after your dead twin brother put me in charge. So yeah, Pretty,” Tony smiled, “a non-zero number.”

“My boyfriends are super-villains,” Peter said giggling. “I’m the only pure innocent one in this place.”

“Why do you think we keep you around,” Tony said.

 “That’s why we keep you around,” Bucky said, almost in unison. They high-fived. And found their hands stuck together with webs.

“Where did you…” Tony said in shock.

Peter chuckled. “Bucky… how many guns do you have hidden in the penthouse?”

“A… lot,” Bucky said sheepishly.

“Tony,” Peter said in a sing-song. “How many of those bracelet thingys do you have laying around in case the micro-repeaters stop working?”

“Um… like he said.”

“Do you think I only have two webshooters?” Peter laughed.

“Get us out of this,” Tony said, irritatedly. “I have to call and order dinner.”

“I can do it.” Peter picked up a phone.

“I am not going to listen to you mangle the Italian language, kid. Get your super-villain boyfriends out of this. Or we’ll kidnap you and take you to our secret lair.”

“Wait,” Bucky said, “that sounds like fun.”

“It does, doesn’t it?” Tony grinned.

“Yeah. It does,” Peter chimed in. “When I’m not fuckin’ starving! Karen, hit them with the dissolving fluid.” He aimed his hand at Bucky and Tony’s joined wrists.

Tony’s left eyebrow questioned him.

“Tony… of course I can move Karen to my webshooters like you move FRIDAY to your glasses. If you want your proprietary tech to stay proprietary, stop letting FRIDAY do everything for you.”

“He’s…?” Bucky started, incredulously.

“A genius? Yeah. Gonna put me out of a job. Give me the goddamn phone.”

“Nope,” Bucky made a grab for it. “I am not gonna listen to you mangle the Italian language.”

Which led to a string of cursing in said language as Peter facepalmed. “I am never going to eat.”

~~~~~

“That wasn’t Italian,” Bucky said as they finished dinner.

“Of course it was. I mean I am fond of Gargulio’s for old times sake, but Marea’s better.”

“Not the food,” Bucky said, making a dive for the last of the desert.

Tony laughed. “Not exactly Italian. But you didn’t speak it when you went to Gargulio’s did you?”

“Italian? Fuck, I could maybe manage proper English.”

“You would’ve heard the difference. It’s Napoletano. Like your English can’t lose Brooklyn? My Italian can’t lose Naples because I learned it from my mom.”

“She was actually from Italy?” Bucky said, still hesitant to bring up the subject.

Tony nodded. “She came here to go to university. An unexpected me put an end to it.”

“I’m sorry,” Bucky said quietly, looking down.

“Why? Did you kill her?” Tony asked.

“Yeah.”

“You gotta stop taking credit for his bullshit, Pretty.” Tony reached out and brushed Bucky’s hair back then lifted his chin, turning his face to him. “When those words were said, were you you?”

“I did it.”

“Not what I asked. Before 1945, would you have done that?”

“Never.”

“You didn’t kill her, Bucky.”

Tears welled in Bucky’s eyes. His jaw clenched as he tried to keep them back. Tony ran the backs of his knuckles lightly across his temple and his tears fell.

Tony scooted his chair next to Bucky’s. “You didn’t kill her.” He leaned forward and pressed his forehead against the side of Bucky’s head. He closed his eyes and his own tears silently fell.

Peter watched the moment pass between them. Tony’s mom’s death was something that had weighed heavily on him his whole life. He was finally getting closure. How could he be jealous of that? They needed each other right then. Peter stood and both men looked at him. He walked around the table and put kisses on top of, first Tony’s, then Bucky’s heads. “Take Bucky to bed,” he said tenderly. “I’m gonna go study.”

“Baby,” Tony said, looking up. He pinched the bridge of his nose after sliding his fingers over his eyes to wipe the tears. “Do you mind?” he asked Peter quietly.

“Not even a little,” Peter said. “Take him to bed.” He paused and brushed his fingers through Bucky’s hair.

~~~~~

“C’mere, Pretty,” Tony said. Their tearful moment past, he felt playful. He turned Bucky and pushed his back gently against the closed door. He draped his arms around Bucky’s neck and chuckled. “Peter’s shorter than me.”

Bucky stood straighter.

Tony rolled his eyes. “Fine!” He pulled himself up on Bucky’s shoulders, stood on tiptoes, and kissed him.

“Not used to taller guys?” Bucky grinned.

“Not in awhile, no.”

“Problem?”

“You’re shorter than me laying down, Pretty,” Tony said with a smirk, standing flat on his feet. He dropped his voice to a whispered purr. “And when I’m on top of you.”

“Fuck,” Bucky said on a long breath.

“Problem?” Tony asked as he grabbed Bucky’s hands and led him to the bed. They rolled facing each other, Tony on his left side, Bucky on his right.

“I’m used to being the most charming, smug, and seductive one in the bedroom, that’s all,” Bucky said laughing.

Tony kissed the laugh off his lips. He brushed Bucky’s hair back. “I love that sound, Pretty.”

Bucky ducked his head, resting his forehead on Tony’s chest. Who was taller than him laying down. “You asked me something when we were all talking earlier.” He put a light kiss on the square inch of skin underneath his lips.

“Hmm? And?”

“Yes, I am.”

“I know, baby,” Tony said tenderly. He’d watched it happen, Bucky slowly fall in love. When he settled into it, it made Tony realize his own love. Feeling actual love for anyone was new, brought out by Peter. Feeling love for Bucky, just as deep but different and needing both, was entirely outside of his experience.

“Will Peter mind?”

“I’m pretty sure Peter already knows. He’s just scared because he’s younger.”

“You’re younger than me.”

“I mean, being an adult. He’s not, but he’s more than just a kid. I kinda toss an extra five years or so on him from the shit he’s been through.”

“About the same age I enlisted,” Bucky nodded. “That’s about how he feels.” He paused. “I love him, too.”

“I know that. And both of us love you. Not just because you give great head.”

“Tony,” he said in mock complaint.

“Most seductive and tallest,” he said, tilting Bucky’s face up for a kiss.

Bucky laughed. “And I thought you were tickling Peter when I heard you two laughi… Oh fuck… He can hear us!”

“Not yet, but I’m gonna fix that,” Tony purred. He ran his palm slowly down Bucky’s chest until he reached his waist. He stopped briefly at the button of his jeans before unfastening it.

It took some entirely unseductive wiggling around before they were both naked and in each other’s arms again. Bucky’s kisses were biting and hot. Tony’s were possessive and deep. Their hands clutched and pulled. It was very much closer, tighter, harder, now!

“I know you like riding me,” Tony said, struggling to catch his breath. “Do you like it on your back?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Bucky said, rather flatly.

“Not what I asked.” Tony rolled himself on top of Bucky. He reached his arms under Bucky’s shoulders and slid himself up along the man’s body. “Baby, that’s something you gotta get used to with me.”

“You talk too fuckin’ much during sex?”

“Okay, that’s two things you gotta get used to with me.”

“The leftovers of your fuckin’ Long Island accent make three?” Bucky grinned and bit again.

“All right, Brooklyn. Since you aren’t objecting…”

Tony found the lube under the pillow he always put it under and kissed Bucky through the awkwardness of doing so. One-handed he managed to squeeze enough of a dollop onto his hand to reach between them and stroke Bucky’s cock. He didn’t play, but directly went for things he’d discovered by rubbing him through his pants.

“Fuck,” Bucky panted, eyes wide at how fast he’d gotten so far.

Tony rubbed precome and lube over the head of Bucky’s cock. “Oh baby, that is… Fuck me, you’re gorgeous when you’re getting gone.”

“Getting? You’re gonna make me come.”

“I’m not gonna make you come before I’m ready to.” Tony took his hand off of Bucky’s cock, reached beneath his balls and slid his still-slick hand between his cheeks. The tip of his forefinger circled his rim and Bucky pushed down against it.

“Greedy,” Tony said, nipping his lip.

With only slightly less finesse than he’d done before — dammit! he and Peter were going to have to compare notes! — Tony coated his finger with lube and worked it inside of Bucky. “I’m not your fuckin’ child bride, Tony.”

“Ya ever think that I wanna do this because I…” Tony slipped another finger inside, “…like watching you?” He spread his fingers apart and slid his third in between them. “Fuck…” Tony moaned, watching the way Bucky moved when his fingers pressed up.

“What?” Bucky asked before he lost the ability to speak. From where he was lying… gasping… writhing… groaning… Tony wasn’t getting anything out of it.

“That, Pretty. That’s what I want. If I just want to get off, I can do that on my own.” Tony slid down a little which let his fingers push in deeper. They made Bucky gasp again. “This…” Tony breathed over his nipple before touching the tip of his tongue to it. Bucky’s breath caught. “…I only get with you.”

“From another person, you mean.”

Tony combined the movement of his fingers and the slow, wet drag of his lips across Bucky’s nipple. Bucky tried to move away from the overstimulation, but was held by Tony’s other hand on his shoulder. He could break free, easily, but he didn’t.

“I meant what I said, Bucky.” He dragged his open mouth down Bucky’s abs. The other man rolled his body up to meet his mouth. Kissing up the center of his body from his navel, Tony’s tongue swirled around the divot of his collarbone,

Bucky nearly came off the bed when Tony entered him. His back arched and Tony’s hands pulled him down, deeper onto his cock. He only thought about it after he’d cried out, but there was no way Peter didn’t hear that.

Tony pulled back with a long slow drag until he was almost entirely out of Bucky. Tony snapped his hips upward as he pushed hard and deep inside. Both hands on either side of Bucky’s head, his fingers tangled in his hair. He kissed him again, slow and soft, His thrusts were slow and long. He leaned up and whispered in Bucky’s ear. “I wanna learn you, Bucky.”

Bucky’s whimpers were nothing like Peter’s. Those were high, desperate, and pleading. Bucky’s broke into little short breaths, low and rising only at the very end. They started out demanding but Tony made them fall into begging.

Bucky groaned, his body broke out in a fine sweat, as Tony was managing to drive him fucking nuts with the way his thick cock scraped just the right way inside of him. Enough to get him hot but nothing more. Enough to make him need.

“Oh god!” Bucky cried out when Tony stopped playing and started fucking him hard. Not fast, but hard. He hadn’t realized that the two things could be separated. Bucky pushed down onto Tony’s cock. “Oh fuck Tony!” I didn’t…” His words were unintelligible. Broken on a rising moan. “That… could…” His attempt to make sense was lost to a loud cry. His cock dripped precome onto his belly.

“Around my waist now, baby,” Tony crooned and Bucky hooked his ankles across each other on Tony’s back. Tony stretched himself out over the taller man, pulling himself deeper as he slid up. Bucky’s heels dug in.

“Oh fuck, Pretty,” Tony moaned, his dark eyelashes fluttering. He snapped his hips sharply, seeking the depth that the new angle gave him. Tony reached up over Bucky’s right shoulder, and threaded his fingers into his long hair, holding his arm still, unable to move. But he said, “Hold me, baby.”

“Tony, no. I can hurt you.” Bucky realized that Tony meant for him to hold with his left arm.

He thrust in hard again. “Hold me, Bucky.” He kept Bucky’s right arm pinned with his elbow on the mattress under his arm, and Tony reaching up still into his hair.

Hesitantly, Bucky wrapped his left arm around Tony’s chest.

Tony kept a regular rhythm, deep and hard but not fast. He ached to go faster. Being inside Bucky was nothing like Peter. He knew Bucky could take it rougher. His body was used to responding to rougher. Tony hated knowing how that adaptation came about. He wasn’t going to blend himself into the body-memory that Bucky had of those times. So no matter how much his Pretty’s responses made him want to go faster, he stayed slow.

“Please…” Bucky moaned on a broken breath.

“Please what baby?”

“Faster. Please.”

“Mm hmm,” Tony purred as he dragged his lips, wet, open mouthed, across the stubble on Bucky’s sharply defined jaw. He went no faster.

“Tony,” Bucky drew out the name on a moan low in his throat.

“Mm hmm?” His thrusts were shallow, deep, and kept Bucky filled. The hand in Bucky’s hair lifted his head to where he could kiss him. It was Tony who bit, held Bucky’s lip in his teeth, and sucked. He nipped sharply and let go. As he did, the snap of his hips finally went faster. Tony felt the fingers of Bucky’s left hand dig into the muscle on his side. Then he heard the faint electromechanical whir of his arm’s strength being pulled back even as the man groaned, distracted with the pleasure of finally being fucked faster.

He released his hold on Bucky’s right arm and moved the man’s hand between them. He waited until Bucky wrapped it around his cock before he sucked his earlobe into his mouth. “Not yet,” he whispered.

Bucky’s eyes opened and he was about to say something when he saw Tony’s smirk. “Oh, fuck you,” he groaned.

Tony laughed softly. His words stuttered. “You can do it now… make yourself come… whenever you want. Or you can wait…” Tony’s smirk returned. “Gets better. Your… choice.”

“Fuckin’ hate you.” The whining moan Bucky made when Tony scraped his teeth along his neck and bit where it curved into his shoulder, proved his words a lie.

Bucky took his hand off of his cock entirely and out from between their bodies. He put it flat on the bed. “Now you have a lot to live up to,” Bucky said, Tony’s smirk transferring to his face.

Tony leaned back more on his knees and balanced his left arm near Bucky’s waist. “Gimme that hand,” he said, reaching behind himself, floundering around for Bucky’s left hand. He leaned forward, holding it by the wrist once he had it. He growled in Bucky’s ear. “I love you.”

Tony leaned back, pulling Bucky’s ass onto his haunches. When he rose up with his thighs, he fucked hard and deep. One hand was on his waist, urging him down to meet him. Bucky started pushing down to do that. Bucky was hot around him, the rocking movement and the man’s eagerness making him clench around Tony’s cock. Tony was groaning in pleasure, letting the powerful sensations distract him from the fear of what he was going to do. He took Bucky’s left hand and put it, flat palmed, on the center of his chest. The first test had been for Bucky. This one was for him. He was more deeply in love with Bucky than he wanted to admit. And Tony couldn’t love, not really love, without trust.

Bucky’s eyes went wide. He was going to object, but when he looked up at him; he saw Tony’s eyes tightly close. He watched as Tony pulled his lips into his mouth and bit them shut. He saw the wince of remembered pain and fear. He saw the struggle on the man’s face as the present warred with the past. He watched the two fight to reconcile. But Tony never moved Bucky’s hand away from the most vulnerable part of his body.

The man he’d betrayed so deeply, giving him that level of trust was unbelievable. “Oh Tony,” Bucky breathed out, overcome. He ground himself down on Tony’s cock, needing to be closer, and was rewarded with the man increasing his pace, pounding into him hard, but without anger or wanting to cause anything but pleasure. Bucky fell into babbling when Tony was at the height of his thrust and, more often than not, managed to hit his prostate. “Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck…”

Tony kept his eyes closed as his hand held the back of Bucky’s hand. Instead of the metal fingers curling around the edges of the arc reactor, trying to hurt him, Bucky touched with nothing but the flat of his palm. He moaned, raised himself up and held in deep, feeling Bucky surrounding him. Tony’s fear finally broke and he let go of Bucky’s hand.

He listened to Bucky panting, fast and shallow — catching, holding, shuddering, letting go. Small deep groans that ended on another caught breath. Bucky’s legs dropped from around his waist and he pushed up with his feet on the mattress, adding his force that of Tony’s as they fucked. Tony pushed himself deeper, ground their hips together, filling Bucky with his entire length. He opened his eyes and looked down.

“Oh Pretty,” he moaned at the sight.

Tony lost himself in those blue eyes, dark with desire, eyelashes fluttering until his eyes closed. Bucky’s lips parted with his ragged breathing — full and swollen, flushed bright pink, wet and shining.

Bucky’s scream was low and loud. His eyes flew open as, untouched, his orgasm tore through him.

“That’s it, Bucky. Come for me, baby. Oh god… oh fuck!”

Tony groaned as his breath held. Both breath and release escaped at the same time. As he shuddered as he came and fell atop Bucky. He draped his arms over his shoulders, under his neck, and held on as the quakes passed through him.

Bucky wrapped his arms around Tony’s chest. They held each other as gasps settled into slow panting and then as their breaths evened out. Yet once they had, they still didn’t let go.

Tony took Bucky’s face in both his hands and kissed him tenderly. He saw the wetness on Bucky’s cheeks and felt it on his own. “You are in control of you, Bucky.” He kissed him again. “You did not kill my mom,” he said quietly

“How did you know I wouldn’t…” He looked down the space between them at Tony’s chest.

“I just knew,” Tony said, brushing the long, sweat damp strands from Bucky’s face.

“I could’ve killed you.”

“Uh huh.” He paused for another kiss. “So can Peter. But, Bucky, look,” Tony said, rolling onto his side. He took Bucky’s left hand and pressed his fingertips onto his side where he had grabbed him while they were fucking. “Are there any bruises?”

“No, but I didn’t try to hold you hard.”

“Yeah, you did. You didn’t hear it. You were too focused on something else,” he said with an over-confident smile. “But I heard it. I heard you pull it back. The way I can feel Peter doing the same thing.”

“I’ve torn the shit out of beds before. I could’ve hurt you.”

“And Peter breaks headboards and walls and shreds my sheets,” Tony said with a shrug.

“You’re crazy.”

Tony chuckled. “Maybe. I just have a fetish for guys who can break me into little pieces — and don’t.” Definitely a fetish. Definitely a power rush of truly epic proportions.

“You made me come even after I stopped touching myself,” Bucky said smiling.

“He does that,” Peter said, coming into the bedroom. “A lot.”

“You give me too much credit, babe,” Tony said smiling as he noticed that Peter was carrying his clothes instead of wearing them.

“I have a feeling he doesn’t.” Bucky, who was still on his back, more or less in the center of the bed, held his left arm open wide for Peter.

Peter crawled onto the bed and over to where Bucky was and settled in his open arm. Though he pulled part of a pillow under his head. Resting it directly on hard metal wasn’t exactly comfortable.

“God that was hot. I came so hard,” Peter said as he kissed Bucky’s chest. He ran his finger through the mess on his stomach. Looking first at Tony, then up at Bucky, he put his finger in his mouth, sucked it, and smiled.

Tony reached for the towel he kept under the same pillow as the lube. He wiped Bucky’s stomach clean. Both he and Bucky chuckled and shared a glance before turning to accuse Peter. “You were sitting outside the door, jerking off to us,” he said.

“Not through all of it.” He curled up closer to Bucky, tangling their legs together. “I did get my studying done. Fast,” Peter added with a grin. “It was so different only listening. Having to use my imagination to see.” He slid his arm across Bucky’s waist. “Bucky gets to be in the middle tonight. How do you like to sleep? Side, back, stomach?” Peter asked, looking up at him. “We used to sleep spooned,” he began, not saying who the other one of the ‘we’ was. Steve, obviously. “But on my back is more comfortable.” He hesitated. “Body habit.” “On your back then,” Tony said. He’d seen the container tubes in Siberia that Bucky would’ve been put in, to sleep on his back. “Until your body decides on another habit,” he added with another little kiss to Bucky’s shoulder.

He balled up a pillow under his head and stretched out along Bucky’s side. Tony reached across Bucky’s stomach to hold Peter’s hand. Bucky’s right hand slipped up from between his side and Tony’s front, to join them.

[mollyh0lmes]

Hello and probably Goodbye, my friends.

having a tumblr since 2013 and no facebook/insta/twitter ever, i just gotta put my final worlds out here in hopes that maybe a few of my followers will pass on the message, before the end of tumblr.

I truly believe that Tumblr is finally coming to a close.

and here is why:

(if you read to the end there’s a treat for you)

————

Our NSFW content is gone, and so is our heartbeat. we can’t deny it much longer...

How is our penises and hearts connected? stay with me, i’m getting there

The people who have left this site, are those who were our creators.

They were our artists, our fanfic writers, our character creators, our loud sjws, our people who were not afraid to put their voices out there. our people who covered ANY and EVERY topic in gory and glorifying detail. our Performers, if you will.

they were our people who spoke so the rest of us could listen. They were our extroverts... i guess

Let’s start from the beginning. Yes this will be long, but it’s really only for the kids who have been here since at least 2015, my people need to hear this before they move on as well..

——————————-

The reason all of us joined this site, is because (dare i say it) we all have the same mind set. maybe even the same ideals in the end. why?

We were the first website that was so constantly inappropriate that we weren’t afraid to hear ANYTHING.

Taboo who??? We don’t beat around the fucking bush.

We take any and every subject and beat it to death in order to find out the one thing we all were looking for.

Turns out in the end... after every debate.

after all the trial and error.

after the back and forth of right and wrong.

after hearing from voices around every corner of the world.

after everyone became an invisible audience that lived behind a reblog button.

after we found our own democracy of judge, jury, and executioner here in this website

We’re figured out that we joined this website for the TRUTH

We joined this website because we could hear the unedited, raw, sometimes (most of the time) TMI, information that came from ALL OVER THE WORLD. With everyone on this site spewing every detail of things they would never share to people they knew in real life, we got to learn the REAL Reality of the world.

Everyone puts on a face depending on who the audience is. we have to, if someone knew the all explicit details of your life. you would probably never want to show ur face to them again.

But Here?

We don’t give a FUCK. We KNOW that we’re ALL goddamn HUMAN. we know we all be nasty stinky garbage slut nuggets. But we all KNOW that deep down we don’t want to hurt anyone we just like weird shit and don’t want to be judged!!

All humans have weird fetishes and obsessions and MOST of them are actually harmless! We’re all freaks but it’s okay! let’s lay the shit on the tumblr table and make sure that your creepy weird ass hobbies, are safe for everyone!

We tag! We filter! We make sure everyone has their safe bubble, but if you want to know something in full detail, we will show you!

This website is.... or was... the deep, carnal, heart of humanity. displayed in full color HD, and for everyone to enjoy in full anonymity, at their own risk.

We all believed in the same thing:

-Find the truth in everything

-be true to yourself

-never harm another person

-treat others as you would like to be treated

Every dedicated Tumblr User (from all over the world) came to this website because they hated taboos, they hated curtains, they hated not seeing all the perspectives, and they hated pretending to be someone they weren’t.

They came to this website because they could witness reality anonymously, and could contribute by rebloging what they knew to be true.

———

But our performers are gone. The raw, unphotoshopped, uncensored, voices had their platform distroyed.

Most of us are still here, but we are just the viewers.

The performers threw out anything and everything they could at us, and what we reblogged the most, revealed our true reality.

The witnesses (the performers) testified, and we the jury (the rebloggers) judged. it was a perfect system.

(whoever the judge is said fuck this shit and left our asses lmao)

But the Performers/Witness are gone

We the rebloggers/jury are here with nothing to reblog. for example...

IVE BEEN ON THIS SITE FOR 7 YEARS AND THIS IS MY FIRST REAL POST

I miss my nsfw freaks and i hate that this platform was distroyed by Normal®️ capitalistic regulations made by people with Money.

Fuck being in the apple store. fuck the “Safe For Work” Bull Shit

I miss my friends. I MISS tumblr from its prime.

LIFE AND POLITICS IS GETTING REAL SCARY, and tumblr was MY safe place. Crazy enough as it sounds it was my voice of reason for all these years. I had to come here to find my “crazy” people who actually believed that every human being has rights, and every topic needs to be debated. I had to come here to be grounded and reminded of the unedited truths.

I fixed my mental illness through therapy and medication because tumblr made me WANT TO.

This place was more like home than my own home was. People hear loved me more than my own flesh and blood.

in the end REAL PEOPLE were behind these anonymous posts and reblogs. real people with real hearts, and though i never actually talked to a single goddamn one of you (lmao),

you were... ARE STILL... MY FAMILY

I MISS THE LOUD PEOPLE WHO HAD CRAZY FETISHES AND REAL HEARTS.

the penis has been cut off and the heart is bleeding out.

I love you all and I will continue to reblog for now, but i feel that the end of my days are coming soon.

soon tumblr truly t won’t have anything to offer us that Cant be found on any other social media site.. .

We lost our soul and now we just rebloging screenshots from other platforms.

We lost our heart.

(because we lost our penis)

—-

For anybody who reads this whole post, i love you, from the deepest part of my heart. You have loved me and i love you.

I love you.

You are the reader, the reblogger, and the most beautiful goddamn person i have ever known.

You are what made this site beautiful and you have saved my life, as well as many others.

I love You.

Brick

(Dead name): Holly

❤️❤️❤️

[sundaynightnovels]

11/11/11

So i’ve been tagged by @elizabethsyson for the 11 question tags! Your answers are all so insightful and thoughtful, they were really fun to read!  Rules: Answer 11 questions. Come up with 11 new questions. Tag 11 people. Anyway, the 11 questions I’ve answered: 1.  Which of your characters would you most enjoy getting coffee with? i’m a really awkward person if i don’t know you well, so i need someone who’s just really comfortable to be around and who’ll be able to break the ice, so i’m thinking... probably Zhen. i mean there’s no such thing as awkwardness with her because she’s just so chill and laidback and she can talk a lot (of nonsense), so she’ll probably just break the ice with that first. there’s a high chance she might try to run out on the bill though... so i gotta watch for that. okay, who am i kidding? she WILL run out on the bill and i WILL get scammed but like, fine. that’s a fate i will have to accept. 2. Whose name took you the longest to be sure of? Teng?? HAHA because what kind of a name is teng anyway??? like... it could mean rattan, which is ridiculous, and while it is also a commonly used word in a chinese name, you don’t usually see it on its own, and if given nicknames, the person probably wouldn’t ask someone to call them as ‘teng’ on its own. so yea! it’s kinda weird, but i think it’s endearing in a way that exactly fits teng as a character. 3. Do you already know the ending of your wip? yup! 4. If your main characters were animals, what would they be? omGGGGgg this is going to take up all of my brain cells once again. ummMMmm. okay. okay. uh. zhen would be a squirrel???? she hoards things (probably) & she is opportunistic. like, if she sees a potential for her to get free things, she will go for it, and then she’ll hide it from everyone else because she’s selfish like that (but the hoard eventually gets discovered and she’s forced to share like a kid at a playground) shou would be an owl, probably. i answered in an ask that if he was a god, he’d likely be a god of the moon, and owls are very close to that. he’s also intelligent and intuitive and full of wisdom, just that you have to uncover it from the heaps of trash he piles on them all. lu would be a cat. he wants food, all the time. he wants attention too, but not like, deliberately. he’s not going to beg you for it, he’s classy that way. he’s pretty independent too, and he’s street smart. he just stays with you when he prefers the comfort of home. yu(f) would be an ox. she is really resilient and diligent, and she doesn’t mind working hard (in fact, that’s all she really cares about... or is it?). She’s also really hot-tempered too and she can flare up at the smallest things, and she’s also as bull-headed as an ox. she can get really stubborn about things and it’s frustratingly difficult to pull her out of it. ren would be a bee (fine, it’s not an animal, let me be!). he’s a hard worker and he’s diligent and she works not just for herself, but for everyone, but often his hard work is overlooked and people just take advantage of him and he knows it, but he doesn’t mind it. he’d rather it, in fact.  jun is probably a red fox. he tends to be rather solitary, even if he interacts with a lot of people, and it’s difficult to really understand who he is or what he’s thinking. he’s also really intelligent and playful, which makes his snarky comments on you especially painful because he makes it clever. just ignoring him would be the best thing to do! teng would be, obviously, as referenced so many times, a bear. he’s like a mother bear! he’s territorial and he’s loving and caring and deeply protective of people who he cares about! he’s also very accepting of others though, and while he appears fierce and brash on the outside, he’s just a huge softy on the inside. another possible animal for him would be the elephant! jia would be a horse. she’s fiery and independent and passionate and full of zest. she’s also really honest and frank, and she’s always ready to take action, like you know things are gonna get done when jia’s around. she’s just that reliable. (i’m sorry, i can’t find an appropriate animal for yu(m) as of yet) 5. What’s the theme song of your wip? i’ve answered this here!  6. What’s your wip’s colour scheme? oh no i’m not good at colours or things like that. i guess the most i can say is probably bluish and like, salmon pink-ish and sunset-yellow-ish?? i don’t even know! 7. What first inspired this wip? OKAY. so there’s this story / tale in chinese folklore about something called the peach blossom springs , which is about this guy who kinda accidentally followed a river to a spring, and then found this utopia land where people kinda led like the perfect, ideal existence without any knowledge of the turmoil going on in the outside world.  there’s also this other thing in mythology about the yellow springs (not the one in ohio), whereby this spring would lead to the underworld or something like that? and so i was like hmMMMmmmm can you imagine the dichotomy between these two? what if someone was in search of the peach blossom springs but what they found was instead this pathway to hell  (i actually wrote a completely unrelated short story about that, which... isn’t the best, yknow, but i had a little bit of fun with it) so yea! that was literally the premise of my wip! it’s not explicitly mentioned anywhere in my wip and you’ve gotta do a lot of inferences for it, but this inspiration is still kinda, sorta there if you squint. so yeah!  8. What style of illustrations would you want for it if you could hire any artist? i would like the artist to be me and i would like to be able to draw.  9. Which of your characters would be the least vs most freaked out to find out they’re fictional? HA. most of them wouldn’t be freaked out at all. with how everything has been going for them, they’re most likely just gonna go like ‘well, this might as well happen’. or maybe even ‘of course this must be it’. jun and zhen in particular would be so done with it. they’re not even in the least bit freaked out (in fact, jun probably knows a little bit about it since... well, he likes to give self-referential jokes) teng’s probably the only one who’d be the most freaked out, but by then no one really cares about his reaction. 10. Which of your characters could get away with robbing a bank? Why? oh, almost all of them. shou wouldn’t do it, but if he did, he’d annoy the police officers into letting him go. zhen would be able to find so many goddamn loopholes in everything and talking to her is like going through inception 10x in one day. like, you don’t even know what is right and what is wrong or what is up and what is down. you don’t know anything anymore. & lu would be right there being her biggest sycophant. jun would legit be able to get away with robbing a bank. you probably won’t even know he did it. you won’t even suspect him. everyone else around him is a huge suspect though, because he will pin it on them all.  jia would be hella good too, like if her mind’s set on a heist, she’s gonna do a heist and it’s gonna be done brilliantly and if she wants it to be a huge media spectacle, she’s going to be able to pull it off without getting caught. she goes all in man, what can i tell you? 11. Which of your characters would be the worst to interact with on tumblr? so many of them.  teng would be one of those blogs you block immediately on sight because all his posts are about loneliness and wanting to search for love and things like that.  you don’t even want to look at shou’s mess. lu will be unnecessarily aggressive to everything and anything he sees. you post a photo of food? GIVE IT TO ME YOU HEARTLESS ASSHOLE OF AN ADULT WHAT’S THE POINT OF HAVING A JOB AND EARNING MONEY IF YOU WON’T GIVE FOOD TO A KID??!!! jun would be terrible. imagine that he has a writeblr. imagine that he has the greatest, most thought-provoking, most imaginative and never-before-thought-of premise that you could’ve possibly seen on this site. it is beautiful. the first lines that he has posted are magnificent. you want more -- nay, you clamour for more! it is all that is sustaining you in this life! yea, you know what’s gonna happen. he’s gonna tempt you with all that sweet fruit and he’s not gonna log on again. like, ever. maybe once in five years to dangle another juicy bit, and then he’s out.  he’s the worst. block him at all costs.

okay!! i’m going to try my hand at giving 11 questions this time, and they are: 1) which of your OCs will survive in a zombie apocalypse and why? 2) which of your OCs will be the most successful in life (you can define what success is)? 3) who would you love to hang out with in a theme park? 4) if your OCs had a tumblr blog, what would their theme / blog content be? 5) which scene has been the most difficult to write, and why? 6) what are your OCs thoughts on politics (in general)? 7) what do your OCs think about sparkling water? 8) how often does your writing follow your plan for it (does it go according to what you’ve planned out, or does it branch out often? do you not have any plans at all?)? 9) use three words to describe your wip’s ending (even if you haven’t written it yet!) 10) what are the three most important elements in your wip? 11) what would be your first reaction / action to finishing your wip (if you have one draft written, imagine this for your final draft!)?  okay i’m tagging @brynwrites @inked-waves @inexorableblob @aslanwrites @surroundedbypearls @insearchof-solace @inkpot-dreamer @vhum @latechickadee @focusdumbass @cawolters remember, there’s no pressure to do it, & if you want to do it, you can just take your time with it as well! <3

[shellheadtmarc]

Shipping  info  meme.

Answer  the  following  for  your  muse(s)  so  people  know  how  shipping  works  on  your  blog.

WHAT  IS  YOUR  OTP  FOR  YOUR  CHARACTER ? oh boy uh.  i don't have like a blanket otp necessarily, unless you count like...pepperony, i guess, and 616 and aa stony.  those two i'm weak af for i'll pretty much buckle early on even when i say i'm not gonna do the thing.

WHAT  ARE  YOU  WILLING  TO  WRITE  WHEN  IT  COMES  TO  SHIPPING ? i'm more fond of soft ships for tony.  like he's gotten enough hell in canon, especially 616?  where he's gone through toxic relationship after toxic relationship, be it romantically or with friends.  he's got a warped view of himself in relation to other people, because other people tend to use him for influence or protection or money.  so.  soft things, things where tony actually feels loved and secure in a relationship.  a little angst is good now and then but honestly i'm Tired of having him feel like he's being jerked around, you know?  let him be loved and soft and happy.

HOW  LARGE  DOES  AN  AGE  GAP  HAVE  TO  BE  TO  MAKE  IT  UNCOMFORTABLE ? usually i'm not really here for anything with a partner for tony under the age of 25.  that's really a pretty large gap - mcu or 616 - and maturity is a must because he's typically lacking.  i have one (1) ship that breaks that, where said partner is 22, and in that case he's 1000x more mature, practical, and level-headed than tony is, so it's a special scenario that couldn't be repeated with anyone else unless there were very specific circumstances that happened in that ship itself.

ARE  YOU  SELECTIVE  WHEN  SHIPPING ? i'm pretty selective, yeah.  i'm not really keen on being forced?  into a ship i nor tony wants?  it's happened before so it makes me a little gunshy when certain red flags pop up (goal post moving when i say no to something or say something won't work because of how it would pull tony ooc, etc).  i require some chemistry.  which isn't to say i'm not all for throwing our idiots together to see if they have a spark, that's totally cool, but that spark has to be there for it to be a ship.

HOW  FAR  DO  STEAMY  MOMENTS  HAVE  TO  GO  BEFORE  THEY’RE  CONSIDERED  NSFW ? my take on it is:  if it doesn't show up on syndicated tv in the us, it goes under a cut.  language i tend to tag but not cut, but actual...you know.  sexy times do.  not that...i have ever written actual sexy times on this blog.  the fact that this hasn't happened yet here is a goddamn head-scratcher.

WHO  ARE  OTHER  CHARACTERS  YOU  SHIP  YOUR  CHARACTER  WITH  ? uh...it all depends on chemistry of portrayals but.  i can be down for a few ships with the right combination, i guess.  ironstrange is one.  frostiron is another.  what is the ship name for it, y'all got too many of them, uh...tony/thor?  ironthunder?  if that's not the name it fucking should be.  i can get behind tony/jen in 616, and tony/janet.  616 pepperony is the ship never meant to be but i still pine for it.  ironhusbands is a good one, uh...i can be here for science boyfriends.  if you squint hard at some of the early and newer iron man runs you can see hints of doomtony.  there are a lot i could actually see happen with the right combination of mun and muse.

and as for ships going right now, i've got a small but tasteful selection of canon character ships, ships with crosscanon stuff, and some oc ships.

DOES  ONE  HAVE  TO  ASK  TO  SHIP  WITH  YOU ?   discussion is good!  i prefer that.  i want to see if there's anything there before jumping into it completely.  all you gotta do is hop into these dms and be like "hey i wanna shove these nerds' faces together" and we'll see where it goes.

HOW  OFTEN  DO  YOU  LIKE  TO  SHIP ? it's not my main priority.  full disclosure, when i say ship, from my rp background (livejournal and dreamwidth) i mean a romantic ship.  those aren't the most important things in the world for me.  like i'm here for them, i love them, but it's not the biggest thing ever.  so that's what i mean when i say ship.

otherwise stuff falls under the blanket of the term cr (character relationships), which could be anything from found family, real family, to frenemies and straight up archnemeses with no romantic connotation.

the more you know.

ARE  YOU  SHIP  OBSESSED  OR  SHIP  MORE  -  OR  -  LESS ? less, i'd say.  i like a wide variety of different kinds of relationships.

ARE  YOU  MULTI-SHIP ? always and forever.  i'm up for possible polyships, too.

WHAT  IS  /  ARE  YOUR  FAVOURITE  SHIPS  IN  YOUR  FANDOM(S) ? outside of with tony?  carolrhodey is a big one, they're fucking adorable.  reedsue.  ben and alicia.  doomreed.  pete and mj.  gwen and mj.  gwen and pete.  pete and harry.  i...i have a lot we'd be here all day if i tried to list them all.

HOW  DOES  ONE  SHIP  WITH  YOU ?   hop into the ims, shoot me a message on discord, like a ship call, whatever, and tell me you wanna lock our idiots in a closet together.  that's the easiest way.

TAGGED  BY :  stole it TAGGING :  steal it

[mysteli]

es in vegas (choices crack series) part 1

A/N: This is gonna be so weird I already know! But it’s hopefully gonna be fun. This is my first crack-fic so don’t mind if it’s a little messy but this first chapter is the lead up to Vegas so it’s  bound to be all over the place. Anyway, I hope you like it! You were all really excited for this so I hope I did it justice!

Warning: the best way to describe this is probably... mature? mainly of the content in it because if it’s just clean then it ain’t really Vegas. this series will feature implied nsfw but not really anything descriptive (mostly just mentions), exaggerations on use of alcohol, strong language and... crazy behaviour? It’s just weird and I’d proceed with caution... 

PS: this chapter does feature a little bit of nsfw but it’s barely anything... it’s just a little innuendo. 

Disclaimer: most of the plot belongs to the Hangover and the characters belong to Pixelberry. I’m just mashing the two together. 

Pairings: Jake X MC, Craig X Zahra, Diego X Vaaryn, Aleister X Grace - just the OG pairings for now but things could change ;) -

Tag list: @brightpinkpeppercorn @likethetailofacomet @xo-endlessmayhem-xo @sceptilemasterr @indiacater @chyeahboy @candychoices @zaffrenotes @nicknameking @bailey-choices @szeherezada @whatsernamerps @aries-light @endlessly-searching-for-you @justboredtrash @beckettsattunement @gerrysacushla @mind-reader1 @sweet-honeybird @allykrane @seraxa @violarobics

I tagged everyone who liked the post just in case! If you wanna be removed, just let me know!

Let me know if you wanna be tagged! 💗and let me know if the tags work because Tumblr is acting up.

Masterlist

Summary: With Aleister and Grace set to be married in a matter of days, the gang decide to have separate last minute bachelor and bachelorette parties before they tie the knot. And what better place to go than... Las Vegas!

Words: 9003 (I apologise in advance)

ENDLESS SUMMER IN VEGAS PART 1 - SIN CITY

“Oh my god... oh my god.. is this really happening?” 

The shaky excitement practically bouncing off of Grace’s usually more timid voice echoes in Logan’s ears, as she once again listens to Grace having a literal panic attack over a goddamn party. Sure, it makes sense. She sounds excited but the worry seems to shine through more than anything. It’s painfully obvious that she isn’t too experienced in parties or a lot of social events and it appears in her voice like she’s trying to hide the fact that there are any nerves activated at all. 

Grace worries about everything. She overthinks things way so much almost all of the time and ever since she and Aleister announced their engagement, she’s done nothing but excessively worry about planning the wedding. Now, with only a few days to go, the group came to the conclusion that both of them needed a break. So they all suggested separate bachelor and bachelorette parties so that the two of them can cool down and at least enjoy their last few nights as single people. With this idea in this place, Grace and Aleister were pretty up for it... until Jake chimed in with the addition of going to Vegas. 

Of course he would be the one to announce that sort of idea and everyone was really excited about that and Grace and Aleister had no choice but to accept, no matter much they tried to say how much they wanted something quaint and simple. They’re crazy if they think a trip to Vegas is gonna get put aside when it comes to their group. Besides, it seems like a great chance to bond together again and enjoy a nice weekend in America’s most sinful city. 

Now they’re around an hour away from leaving and Logan has been trying to finish her packing while Jake is on the phone trying to get out of work for the weekend. Should be pretty busy, even if he is the world’s worst liar. Logan basically give him that trait by pointing it out. He’s too dedicated to this Vegas trip to not be determined enough to get outta work so he should be fine. Meanwhile, Logan hasn’t been able to finish her damn packing since she’s been on the phone with an extremely anxious Grace for about an hour now. The girl is doing nothing but panicking. Clearly she doesn’t believe she can summon the courage to go to Vegas and actually enjoy herself. Maybe it’s the thought of being without Aleister for a night or maybe she’s just socially awkward or maybe she doesn’t wanna waste her money. She’s mentioned all those things and not settled on one. 

Logan huffs in annoyance at Grace’s constant panicky state. She’s spent an hour now trying to keep Grace calm but nothing seems to be fucking working. She grabs her heels from the bottom of her closet and tries her best to keep up with Grace’s repetitive tangents. 

“Logan... I am not prepared for something as huge as this.” Grace suddenly says and Logan rolls her ocean eyes, really not sure what to make of this entire scenario. 

“What do you mean something as huge as this? It’s Vegas. You get drunk and have fun. That can’t be as difficult as getting married.” Logan points out, impatience running around her tone and she runs a hand through her platinum hair out of frustration. She can’t pack with all these damn distractions. 

“Of course not but... I’m just nervous. What if we don’t come back? What if we get too drunk and make some dumb mistakes? Oh shit... what if we kill someone?” Grace is really starting to sound like an idiot now. It’s like she thinks they’re taking part in the fucking Hunger Games or something.

“Listen, Chidi... this is Vegas.” Logan smirks at the actual good nickname she just used. Wow... if only she said it in front of Jake. He would be so proud.

“Exactly. It’s Vegas. You’ve heard all the horror stories, haven’t you?” Logan can practically hear Grace biting her own nails and gritting her teeth because of how damn worried she is about this trip.

“You haven’t been watching those, have you? Cause that’s called clickbait, Grace.” Logan warns Grace and rightfully so. If Grace is worrying about what fake people are saying on the internet than this is just ridiculous. 

Grace is silent for a moment and that is all the answer that Logan even needs. “...No.” is all Grace manages to mutter and Logan just rolls her sapphire eyes at the thought, stuffing her last shirt into her bag. 

With a heavy sigh, Logan composes herself and tries to actually provide Grace with decent advice. “I’m gonna tell you this right now. Nothing bad is going to happen. It’s just all twelve of us having a fun time in Vegas. And remember you’re celebrating your last few days as a single woman, which means you gotta make the most of it! I suggest you loosen up and shed all those nerves because you’re gonna need your confidence when you’re out there.” Logan nods to herself proudly when she catches the sound of Grace sighing with a sign of relief, which clearly reveals that she’s calmed down at least a little.

“You’re right... I shouldn’t be worrying. I shouldn’t be panicking. I should be ecstatic because we get to go to Vegas and it’s my bachelorette party. This will be fun!” Grace seems to be trying to energise herself now with reassuring words and motivation. She’s not really talking to Logan anymore.

“Good. That’s the attitude we want, Grace.” Logan appreciates Grace’s sudden mood change and she releases a deep sigh when she realises this is a good time to hang up and finish packing. “Ok... well I’m gonna let you get to it and I’ll meet you at the—“

“Wait!” 

“What?!” Logan questions, suddenly worried that something’s happened. 

“What if Aleister hooks up with a stripper?!” Grace alarms Logan for no reason and she is left just completely fed up.

“Bye Grace.” 

Logan swiftly hangs up her phone before she loses her sanity and the last of her brain cells. Exhaling sharply, she tosses her phone on the bed and tries to remember what the hell she was doing before. That conversation with Grace might have completely messed her up. Luckily, a lightbulb goes off in Logan’s head and she quickly gets back to finishing her packing. After about fifteen minutes of finishing everything up with her bags and cleaning the bedroom, Logan makes her way out of the bedroom, hooking her bag on her left shoulder as she exits the area. When she reaches the living room, her sapphire eyes glance over a familiar figure pacing back and forth, with a phone pressed against his ear. Of course its Jake and Logan can’t help but form a weak smile at the sight of him. He looks proud of himself and it probably means that he was successful in his plans to get out work. 

From the corner of his eye, Jake spots his wife with her own ocean eyes fixed on him. He shoots her a flirty wink and a clean thumbs up before quickly finishing up on the phone.

“Yeah ok. I’ll see you Tuesday morning.” Jake ends the call and stuffs his phone in the pocket of his jeans before making his way over to Logan, who is eyeing him with expectancy. “I got out of work.” Jake declares with a natural confidence (something Grace definitely doesn’t have).

“Oh I know. I could tell by the sly smirk on your face.” Logan counters with her own smirk crossing her lips and she presses her palms against Jake’s chest after letting her bag drop to the floor. She doesn’t really seem to notice though and neither does Jake. 

Jake responds to her action eagerly by snaking his hands around Logan’s waist and letting his hands explore the curves of her body. “That’s always there, Princess.” He whispers before leaning in and briefly bringing their lips together. He chuckles lowly as they pull away when he spots the clear excitement in his wife’s eyes. “Guessing you’re ready for Vegas.”

“Of course I am. I’m so glad we’re taking Furball as well!” Logan exclaims excitedly and Furball is propped up against the sofa, dancing with glee.

“Mmmmrf!”

“I’m also ready to down every drink I buy and...” Logan takes this an opportunity to have some fun with the moment they’re having. “...maybe see some strippers.”

“Oh really now? You’re lucky I won’t be there to kick their ass if they even look at you.” Jake retorts, a little surprised that Logan is choosing now to play a game like this. He leans in again, lips pausing inches away from Logan’s - their heavy breaths bouncing off of the other’s lower lip. 

“You’re not gonna be there though, are you?” Logan pouts as she continues to torture Jake, meeting eyes with him and she can practically see his own darken with desire. Damn, they aren’t even in Vegas yet. 

“Trust me on this though, darlin...” Jake begins, letting his eyes roam over Logan’s heavenly features and allowing his hands to be dragged up her back until they’re tangled in her hair. “...I’ll leave you so damn satisfied, you won’t even know those strippers are looking at you the way they will.”

With that, Jake yanks Logan in for a well overdue kiss, immediately building up a steady rhythm and the passion inside them both is let out the second their lips connect. They got about twenty minutes and that’s plenty of time to just get in some... rounds before they head off to Vegas. Besides, they’re gonna be separated most of the night so it isn’t a bad idea to just have fun with each other before they leave for Vegas. Hell, they don’t even know how they’re gonna survive at a party that is about Grace and Aleister. No offence to them but they aren’t exactly the most lively in the group. They’re the ones that tend to keep to themselves the most and reject the offers of everyone hanging out together but this whole thing they just couldn’t get out of. They prefer solitude and that’s their problem honestly.

Logan roughly bites down on Jake’s lower lip, taking it between her teeth for a few seconds and letting him know that she’s ready to spend the next few minutes using their more wild sides. Jake obliges, sweeping Logan off her feet in one swift motion and steadying her in the air by her waist. Logan helps by wrapping her legs around his waist, as Jake leads her over to the kitchen and carefully places her on the counter. The kiss never breaks and the heat never dies. It’s impossible for that to happen when it comes to them because they’re always wanting each other and needing each other. Maybe they’re just crazy but it also makes sense for people like them. Just shows how much they love each other. 

Logan blindly uses her hands to guide Jake’s jacket off his body and he smirks against her lips as she carries that out. He breaks the kiss momentarily, letting his lips drift down her neck and his lips linger in one place for a moment. He’s almost preparing to leave some sort of love bite but before he can... 

“Holy mothertrucking poop on a wenis!” 

The sound of a very traumatised voice forces Jake and Logan apart and just the extreme exaggeration of the reaction to them gives away the identity of the intruder. Carefully and slowly, Jake turns to where the witness is standing and he barely manages to hold back a laugh, while Logan is left with complete embarrassment flooding her expression.

“Raj...” Of course it’s Raj. “Chill. You didn’t see anything gross. What you saw is what... pigeons do in broad daylight and I don’t see you getting mad at them.” What the fuck is Jake talking about?

Logan facepalms hard and her humiliation only grows. “Jake... please stop talking.” 

Raj’s chestnut eyes are wide with disbelief, that natural innocence lost the moment he walked in on... this. Jake presses his lips together and avoids all eye contact with Raj as an attempt to stop himself from laughing his brains out. Logan cautiously hops off the counter and tries to bring back Raj back to the real world. The dude seems dazed and completely out of it. 

“Raj?” 

No answer.

“Mimosa Man? You okay?” Jake just has to chime in with that nickname. 

“I thought you weren’t supposed to call him that.” Logan reminds Jake with arched eyebrows. 

“No that’s the one he likes. The one he didn’t like was Tequila Stealer.” Jake responds and revisiting that nickname only makes it more difficult to not laugh. 

At last, Raj manages to blink and breathe and gather himself finally. He flicks his gaze between the two lovebirds before him and he cringes a little when he reminds himself of what he walked into.

“Jesus would be disappointed in you...” Raj states randomly. It almost comes across like a joke but his solemn expression tells a completely different story.  “...and the kitchen?! Really? That’s where you cook, dudes.” 

“We’re sorry, Tequila St— I mean Mimosa Man.” Oof. Jake almost released the devil of all nicknames again. 

Raj is really coming off as intimidating right now. This whole moment is just unbearable and awkward. “Ugh... okay. Come on, guys!”

“Where?”

“Vegas! Duh!” Raj rolls his brown eyes as a reaction to Jake’s stupidity. “We’re all going one of Grace’s mom’s limos so come on!”

Logan is taken aback a little by that statement. “But I thought we were taking Quinn’s minivan.” 

“Catch on, my dudes.”

After what feels like forever, the oh so amazing limo that Grace’s mom had set up for them to drive in - with Grace being the only one who is allowed drive it because if anything happens to to it... well someone will get hurt - finally passes the memorable Welcome of Vegas, completed with a description of the city in one word... Fabulous! The limo is pretty sweet though but it does have one price. They didn’t even get an arranged driver. Grace has been bugging her mom about having her own responsibilities lately instead of having everything handed to her. Well her mom granted her wish by giving her the responsibility to drive the limo there and back and not damage it all in the process. What the fuck does she think they’re doing? They’re in Sin City.

Grace is starting to get frustrated with the amount of traffic that’s building up in their surroundings and they aren’t even that far from the hotel. Luckily, she’s a calm driver but if anyone else was driving this car, we’d have many problems and many arguments. Lots of noise. With the slight pause, everyone (yeah everyone is in the limo and even Vaaryn decided to tag along) takes this as a chance to talk about their plans for the parties. 

“So... what do you all wanna achieve tonight?” Quinn challenges the group to name their goal for the night and everyone’s faces just light up at the thought of what they might do in Vegas - well everyone aside from Aleister. Grace is now a lot more into the idea than she was before and Aleister is really the only one left who is in denial. At Quinn’s question, everyone else is pleased to answer but Aleister just rolls his icy eyes and hangs his head, tuning out of the conversation. 

Raj starts things off with some kind of far away fantasy that he seems really serious about achieving but no one could be drunk enough for it to happen. “My goal is to be drunk enough that I will somehow wake up and end up in Disneyland.” He tells the idea to the group rather confidently and he seems really proud of something like that. Quinn seems fascinated by it and she knows she’d love to do it too.

“Disneyland?! I would do it even if I wasn’t drunk.” Quinn exclaims, giddy and excited and her sky blue eyes sparkle with excitement.

“Pretty sure you’d need more than mimosas for that, buddy.” Jake points out, causing Raj to roll his eyes.

“What is with you and comparing me to mimosas, Jake? I like other things too.” Raj questions, raising his eyebrows bewilderedly at Jake.

Jake merely forms a devilish smirk and just that look is enough to know that a comeback is coming. “Like tequila?” He retorts, only earning a rough nudge from Logan who shoots him narrowed eyes of annoyance.

“Says you. Before I saw you and Logan fucking on the kitchen counter.” Raj randomly points out, completely exposing Jake and Logan and they are suddenly washed over with humiliation, as all their friends react about the way you’d expect them too. 

“What? Why would you do that? It’s so unhygienic.” Michelle pipes up and it’s surprising that she’d be the one to say something as dismissive as that. 

“Dude! We weren’t even fucking. We were barely even kissing!” Jake snaps, folding his arms out of irritation and eyeing Raj with complete disbelief, not finding the strength to believe he just exposed them like that. 

“You looked like you were about to suck the blood out of poor Logan.” Raj counters, a sympathetic look on his face as he looks directly Logan’s way and she just shrugs her shoulders, unsure how to even react to whatever the hell just happened. 

“You think I was trying to turn my wife into a fucking vampire or something? Actually that’s called giving someone a hick—“

“—Okay! Moving swiftly on...” Quinn cuts Jake off before he can completely tamper with Raj’s innocence. He don’t deserve that. “Let’s not ruin anyone’s lives today Jake.” 

With that, Jake scoffs mockingly and leans back in his seat, his back sinking into the soft leather. Maybe he’ll learn that his comebacks are not needed, especially in times that are supposed to be fun like these. 

“Who wants to go next?” Quinn surveys the sight of the limo, smiling faintly when her eyes land on one specific person. “...Aleister. What about you?”

Aleister doesn’t even glance up, shaking his head defiantly as his icy gaze remains fixed on his phone screen. “I’m not gonna participate in some ridiculous game, where you make up stupid fantasies that you’d never have the true guts to do anyway.” He snaps in a cold tone. It’s been so obvious from the beginning that he isn’t really up for this whole Vegas thing but he could at least pretend to be onboard for the sake of the rest of the group having fun.

In truth, everyone really needs this time to take a break from all their hectic lives. Everything has been going really well career wise but nobody has the time to relax or enjoy themselves for a while. That’s why this time away is so important to most members of the group and with the wedding so close, you’d think Aleister would be more eager to participate. 

“Al... come on. Just tell us what you wanna do in Vegas.” Grace tries to reason with him since she’s the only one who ever has any success. 

“I wanna sit around and do nothing. I’m aware I’ll be the only one who is sober throughout the night.” Aleister states solemnly, lifting his head momentarily and staring pointedly at Jake as he mutters those last few words. Damn, what a low blow. 

“So wait... you’re not gonna drink?” Sean questions, raising his eyebrows with disbelief.

“Why the hell would I want to?” 

“Um... because it’s your bachelor party.”

Aleister is flooded with a tension as those words come out of Sean’s mouth. “I never even said I wanted this but you all dragged me along anyway. I’d rather just be married but no... you all just had to hit me with the lie that celebrating my last few single days mattered.” 

“Were not saying it’s a requirement. We just want you to have fun for once.” Logan points out, slightly offended since she’s the one who supported this whole idea when Jake suggested it in the first place. It’s actually a great thing but Aleister is too guarded to see that. 

“Whatever, Logan. Just know that I won’t be drinking. I’d rather be sane, thank you very much.”

“Watch us spike it.” Zahra hisses, a devious smirk planted on her face and Craig high fives her in response. 

Eventually, the traffic clears and the group finish up their conversations as the limo edges closer towards the hotel. Grace calms her frustrations with the traffic and you can tell she’s keeping it bottled up inside so she doesn’t lash out. She seems to be the type of person you wouldn’t expect to have a mean streak or a dark side but would have one anyway. Don’t judge a book by its cover is the lesson we’ve learned today. Now there is still one more matter to address...

“Oh my god... I still can’t believe you wanted to come to Vegas with us, Vaaryn.” Diego exclaims, probably the most excited out the lot. Mostly about the fact that his one true love was joining the group for Vegas. It sounds like a great thing and an amazing opportunity but at the same time... it could be devastatingly scarring.

“I’m mostly doing for you, my love, but it would be nice to experience more human things and Vegas you speak of, is a very popular place for sinning and I know that sinning is something humans do a lot of.” Vaaryn responds and he sounds completely clueless. He really doesn’t know what’s in store for him. 

“Vaaryn... do you even know what’s in Vegas? Has Diego taught you anything?” Estela questions with a knowing smirk, shooting Diego a pointed look, who facepalms at what Estela is insinuating. 

“He hasn’t told me much. Just that it has an Eiffel Tower and it’s very easy to lose yourself.” 

Zahra sees this as the perfect oppurtunity to chime in. “Well then let me know tell you about the wonders of Vegas.” She declares, learning her chin on her fist and revealing a genuine look of interest. 

“Please... don’t.” Diego pleads anxiously and Logan pats him on the back apologetically. “He probably won’t even understand what you mean.”

“I’ll explain it then. Very vividly.” Zahra counters, folding her arms. 

“Oh man! Diego... your dude is so screwed.” Craig exclaims, obnoxiously laughing in the background at the scene and pointing mockingly at Diego, who’s head is now in his hands. 

“Oh come on, this is mean. Just let Avatar find out for himself. Telling him is too easy.” Jake suggests and that causes Zahra and Craig to smirk and giggle in unison.

“You’re on. Have fun, Vaaryn.”

When Grace successfully parks the limo outside the Caesar Hotel, everyone leaps out and makes their way inside. The lobby is absolutely fucking huge and they have to really search using their eagle eyes in order to even locate the front desk. Luckily, they manage to spot it and Michelle leads the group over to the front desk, since she was the one who offered to pay for their reservation. She ends up paying for a villa, which is probably the most they could get out of Michelle since she isn’t great on spending all of her money on the room. But she’s a doctor! Who else was gonna pay?

Excited and energised, everyone rushes to get to the designated room, clutching the straps of their bags and being as careful as possible so they don’t drop them. But once they get to the room, all the carefulness and caution is pushed away and everyone just throws their bags to the side, amazing at the sight of the huge room. There’s thirteen of them so some of them may still have to get together in bunks but they would much rather just have one room together than be in separate ones because once the two parties travel back to the room, they can all celebrate together afterwards. It’s a strangely thought out system but it works for them so who is to judge?

“God fucking damn. I missed Vegas.” Jake suddenly points out and Logan raises an eyebrow at her curiously when he says that.

“When was the last time you went?” 

Jake smiles at the thought of reminiscing. “Mike and I went to Vegas once when I brought him back to visit my family for the first time. We had a crazy fucking time in Vegas, I’ll tell ya that. Don’t actually remember much though.” Jake explains, laughing under his breath but exhaling sharply when he sees himself talking about Mike again. 

Noticing, Logan wraps him in a hug and briefly brings their lips together in a reassuring kiss. “I’m sorry he couldn’t be here for this, babe. He just couldn’t get out of work like you could.” 

“Yeah well... sometimes plane jobs suck.” Jake laughs before knocking his forehead against Logan’s and smiling. “You gonna be able to have fun without me, Princess?”

“I’m sure she’ll manage, cabron. Sometimes she’s tougher than you.” Logan and Jake turn to find Estela smirking at them, both hands resting on her hips. 

What’s very different about Estela though is that she’s already fucking dressed?! It only feels like they’ve been in the room for 10 minutes or so. She done her makeup and her hair and everything in a matter of minutes. Aside from the timing, she also looks pretty fucking hot. For the first time in forever, Estela is dressed in a clean, skintight dress that is completely pitch black and pauses halfway down her thighs. At the front, in the centre, a golden zipper travels from the top to the bottom. To complete this whole ensemble, Estela has paired the simple yet so sophisticated dress with a pair of leather black heeled boots with zippers down their side. Her silky brunette hair has been let out of the normal ponytail and straightened ever so perfectly. This look appears like it took her hours when really she only spent a few minutes doing this.

Jaw dropped, Logan struggles to speak at the gorgeous sight that is Estela Montoya. “How the fuck did you get ready so fast?” is the best reaction Logan can summon. 

Estela just giggles aloud, dusting off her dress and smoothing our her hair. “I’m just fast, ok? The others are being so fucking slow and you haven’t even started yet!”

Logan flicks her gaze between Jake and Estela, clearly confused. “Well I’ve been—“

“Eye-fucking your husband. I know and I get it but you gotta move your ass before I make sure you lose it!” Estela warns, arching her eyebrows and narrowing her dark eyes at Logan, causing her to panic a little.

Logan swiftly turns to Jake and he just laughs at the fact that she’s asking for his permission. “Go ahead, darlin’. I’ll be out here to see you before we go.” Jake urges, planting a quick kiss on her forehead before letting her go get ready. 

Jake watches her walk into the other room, biting his lip at the sight of her and his cerulean eyes darken slightly. It’s Estela’s exhausted groan that suddenly brings him back to reality. He glances back at the brunette to find her staring at him with disbelief. 

“What? I love my wife. What’s fucking wrong with that?” Jake questions, his intentions appearing rhetorical and Estela notices that.

“Nothing. The look on your face is what’s disgusting.” Estela retorts, shaking her head at Jake with an expression where you can tell she’s been cringing. 

“Ha. Ha.”

Logan finally finishes touching up her makeup with the rest of the girls and she’s finally ready to take on Las Vegas. Turning towards the mirror, Logan admires her chosen attire. She’s gone for something rather classy but still great for a fun night out. A clean, crisp white romper, is what she’s gone with, that contains a semi-deep dip of cleavage but not overboard. She’s aware that will drive Jake crazy. Then she’s paired it with white strappy heels and a silver necklace that is longer than most you’d see. It’s one of those more layered ones and it matches her outfit perfectly. Her platinum blond hair has been curled exactly to her liking, curtesy of Michelle. And her makeup is mostly natural because she doesn’t trust herself to go for something bolder. 

Taking one last glance at herself in the bathroom mirror, it’s time for her to reveal her look to the group. She’s the last one to finish getting ready of course, even indecisive Michelle beat her to it, so everyone is waiting for her and they’re excited to see what’s she chosen to wear. All the rest of the girls have gone for slutty and glam because it’s Vegas. Hello?! Even Zahra decided to wear a cocktail dress of sorts and it’s a beautiful deep crimson colour that matches her hair perfectly.

Finally, Logan collects herself enough to find the strength to exit the bathroom. She wanders out of the other room carefully, determined to stay steady on her heels and when she opens the door to the main area, all eyes are on her. 

Some eyes widen and some jaws drop but the most continuous thing is everyone’s silence. Everyone is speechless. No one will talk. All Logan can do is question their well-being and not really focus on the fact that they’re in that current state because of her walking out of a goddamn room. Jake, especially is just shell-shocked and it’s painfully obvious. Logan takes advantage of the silence and decides to admire everyone else’s appearances since they all look hot. 

That deep red crimson dress that Zahra is wearing looks even more captivating on her than Logan noticed from a first glance. Her ombré hair is left to rest on her shoulder and she’s caked in a lot more makeup than she usually would be, probably because she never typically wears it anyway. She looks so damn different.

Then there’s Grace, the featured guest of the bachelorette party and she’s decked in a bronze, glittery dress that is haltered at the top and it goes down to the floor. The revealing thing about it is the slight slit at the side. The dress hugs her figure carefully and the way she’s styled her hair only makes her look more beautiful. Everyone was scared that Grace would dress like she’s going to prom or something but no... she surprised everyone and she did herself justice. 

Of course Quinn managed to blend a beautiful elegance with a little bit of a daring approach so perfectly. It’s like a natural talent to her and she’s successfully made herself look beautiful again. She’s rocking a deep indigo dress that almost matches the one she wore at the New Years Party on La Huerta. She’s gone for more of a deep cut down the middle and the dress fades into a lighter blue at the end. It’s only a slight gradient that could easily be missed. Her auburn hair is gracefully cascading down her shoudlers and each curl you can tell was done with care. Hell, even the dress matches her eyes. There’s nothing this girl can’t wear. 

And finally we have Michelle, who has literally outdid herself again. She’s decked in a long, black jumpsuit that hugs her curves ever so perfectly. There’s also a more revealing approach that is shown through the sight of more cleavage. Though she wears it well, amazingly well. She’s paired it with more pointy nude heels and a black choker at the tome. Her ombre hair is tied back into a loose ponytail with two pieces hanging like strays at the front. To complete it, she’s wearing large silver hoop earrings that just give it that extra amount of sophistication.

Basically, all the girls look like fucking queens and this is their night to shine. As for the guys... well there’s not much to say. They’re wearing suits. Yeah, that’s their description done. Though there is one strange thing that stands out and that is Craig’s extremely colourful shirt. It’s a fucking double rainbow up in there. So many vibrant colours and patterns. It’s very difficult to not go blind just by looking at it. Like damn... another thing is how weird it is seeing Vaaryn in a suit. Like what? And Furball... looks so fucking cute and he’s not even in a suit. 

After what seems like forever, the only thing Logan can summon up to say is... “Nice shirt, Craig.”

Craig almost blushes. He’s so flattered by the little compliment. “Aw, Lo. Thanks for noticing, dude.”

“Pretty sure the gorillas in Africa noticed your goddamn shirt, Craiggers.” Zahra retorts coldly and Craig’s eyes widen with hope.

“Oh my god. That would be so cool!” 

Sean rolls his eyes and places his hand on Craig’s shoudler idly. “Let’s make sure you don’t drink anymore tonight.”

“You guys are no fun.”

While the bickering commences, some of the gang hurry over to Logan - that includes Quinn, Estela, Michelle and Jake. “Holy shit, Logan. You look so hot!” Michelle exclaims with a rare enthusiasm barely used but she’s been like this a lot for Vegas.

“Thanks, Meech. I did what I could.” Logan dusts herself off and takes a quick glance at Jake, noticing how his cerulean eyes constantly drift up and down her figure and his gaze burns into her body so eagerly. Oh fuck... she knows what he’s thinking. “You ok there, Aragorn?”

Estela scoffs at the look on Jake’s face. “Ha. Pretty sure he’s dead after seeing you like that.” She points out and correctly, mind you. “We’re leaving in five so we’ll let you say your goodbyes.”

The girls take off to the other side of the room, leaving Jake and Logan alone for the last few moments of their time together before they separate for a few hours. Jake finally snaps back to reality as the girls leave, clearing his throat in order to compose himself but it feels like there’s a rock planted deep in his throat. 

“I am so close to not letting you go anywhere tonight, Princess.” Jake whispers in a low husky tone that sends shivers up Logan’s spine. In response, Logan bites down on her lower lip and admires Jake’s chosen suit. It reminds her of the one at the La Huerta New Years Party - except everything is black. 

She reels him in by his pitch-black tie for a long, slow kiss that lingers more than it should. As they pull away, she smiles innocently against his lips. “Nice suit, Aragorn.” She whispers back, knocking their foreheads together sweetly.

“Goddamnit, can I swap Aleister for you?” Jake questions, almost like he’s begging and he almost looks serious. “I can’t handle more than an hour with that bore.”

“Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll manage.” Logan assures, rolling her eyes at his exaggeration of the situation. “Just remember that this is about Aleister. It’s his goddamn party.”

“Well I’m the one who suggested it.” 

“Which gives you more of a reason to make it about Aleister. Even if he is a bit of an asshole, remind him that he’s supposed to be having fun.” Logan suggests, wrapping her arms around Jake’s neck and dragging him in for another kiss, biting down on his lower lip this time before pulling away. 

“Watch me try and watch me fail.”

“Jake.” Logan says his name as firmly as possible. 

“Fine but as long as you torture me when I get back. It’s more fun than being tortured by Aleister‘s dull taste in fun.” Jake retorts, rolling his eyes at the fight that he just lost. 

“I promise.” Logan swears, planting one last kiss on Jake’s lips before finally letting him leave her. 

The bachelorette party has been active for about an hour already, with the girls already having a little alcohol in their system but not enough that will make them wanna do anything so crazy just yet. Well all except Logan Mercer because she’s the oddest of them all. 

All of the girls are pacing across the street, having had just experienced a wonderful meal in the closest restaurant. Now they’ve got the fancy shit out the way, they can move on to the more fun part. 

“That fucking food was too damn fancy for me.” Zahra points out, executing a fake vomit-like noise with her hands and everyone just roll their eyes at her expected remark. 

“I know you wanna get drunk, Zahra, but you still need to eat.” Grace replies, hands on her hips. 

“We can eat! But we’re in Vegas. We should be eating somewhere trashy like... Burger King or Pizza Hut!” Zahra exclaims and no one can really make out what point she’s trying to get across here. 

“Zahra, all you eat back home is Burger King and Pizza Hut.” Michelle bites back, flipping her hair to one side and giggling at the ridiculous context of this conversation.

“What exactly do you wanna do now then, Zahra?” Quinn questions, genuinely curious. 

“Anything that isn’t boring and fancy!” 

A lightbulb suddenly goes off in Logan’s mind and a sly smirk crosses her lips. “Ok... I might have an idea.” 

“Yes, Mercy! Someone smart. What is it?” Zahra eagerly enquires, showing interest in Logan’s insane idea.

“I know we agreed earlier with the guys that we wouldn’t... go see strippers but they can’t exactly stop us when they’re not here.” Logan points out correctly and all of the girls match her level of deviance with their expressions, all except one. Grace, of course.

“Um... Lo. Im not sure I can agree to that. What if it’s like I’m betraying Aleister?” Grace asks with anxiety in her chestnut eyes. 

“Grace, you’re not hooking up with strippers. You’re just watching them. Besides you’re the guest of honour, you should let yourself have some fun!” Estela assures, rubbing Grace’s shoulder comfortingly and that causes her to release a sigh of relief. 

“But just so you know, even if you don’t agree, we’re gonna go to the strip club anyway. I don’t care if you’re the guest of honour. So you either come with us or we leave you on the street?” Michelle warns, a solemn look in her hazel eyes. Clearly she’s not kidding and Grace actually respects that attitude. 

“Agh, fine.” 

“Woohoo!” Zahra reacts, clapping her hands together like a fucking seal. “This what I came for!”

“Really? You didn’t just come for booze?” Logan jokes, her smirk widening.

“Nope. Strippers too.”

The bachelor party is dying pretty quickly, even after the guys’ tacky meal in Pizza Hut but everyone still enjoyed it because its good fucking pizza. Well, everyone besides Aleister. He’s been such a goddamn buzzkill during the first hour and it’s impossible to have fun when the dude is constantly telling someone to shut up and when Jake dares to make a joke about offering Aleister a drink and he almost tosses it on Jake. But he resists, shooting the pilot an icy glare instead. 

Jake is trying his very best to make this all about Aleister, just like Logan asked him too. But it’s impossible to make this dude happy! Everyone else is having fun. Diego was teaching Vaaryn all about pizza and all the different flavours while they were there. Craig was trying to see how many pieces of pizza toppings he could get in his mouth. Raj has been telling lots of fun stories and Jake has managed to not mock any of them, no matter how crazy they are. Be proud of him. Even Sean has managed to not be a buzzkill and he’s actually turning out to be a lot of fun, with plenty of banter and jokes to go around. And Aleister is just being... petty and ungrateful.

Now they’re here, semi-drunk and trying to figure out what the fuck they’re gonna do next. Everything has been pretty low-key so far and maybe this is the time to kick things up a notch. 

“Well that meal was absolutely atrocious.” Aleister is of course the first to comment on the food and it’s not even a compliment.

“Al, I know you hate all of this but could you not trash the food because I paid for that.” Sean asks as politely as his voice will let him and Jake is surprised and maybe even impressed that Sean could call Aleister out like that.

“Of course. This whole thing is sleezy anyway.” Aleister responds, his shoulders slumping back in a hopeless manor. He’s naturally stiff. 

“Well, what do you wanna do then, Aleister?” Raj questions with a genuine curiosity. Usually that type of thing would come off as sarcastic and rude, especially if it came out of Jake or Craig’s mouth. But no, Raj is the only one who could ask such a question and Aleister would actually take it as a real request. 

“Well I—“

“Bro, don’t ask him that!” Craig pipes up before Aleister can say anything else. “He probably wants us to play a game of chess or something. I hate chess.” 

Aleister’s expression sinks at Craig’s hurtful assumption. Don’t think he meant it that way however. “Nevermind. I’ll just let you airheads guide me through his hell hole of a night. It’ll all turn out fine when I wake up.” 

“Harsh, Malfoy,” is all Jake has managed to say throughout this entire situation until an entire new idea pops into his head. “Wait... since Jack Frost is giving us total control... how ‘bout we hit up a strip club?”

“We can’t do that. Didn’t we promise the girls we wouldn’t—“

“Diego, don’t ruin this.” Jake urges, folding his arms in a confident manor and smiles faintly at Diego when he silences himself. “I know we did. But they ain’t fucking here so what’s the problem?”

“I see Jake’s amazing logic here, bros.” Craig agrees, a bright smile fixed on his features.

“Me too. Let’s do it.” Raj is also ready for this as well, it’s clear from the eagerness in his tone.

“Sorry, my love, but what is a strip club?” Vaaryn dares to ask Diego, who just looks at him bewilderedly.

“I’ll explain on the way or I’ll just let you see for yourself.” Diego responds, careful with his choice of words and he pats Vaaryn on the shoudler reassuringly. 

Happy that most are on board, Jake expectantly turns to Aleister with a hopeful glint in his eyes. “How ‘bout you, Frosty?”

Aleister barely tilts his head, in disbelief that Jake has even dared to ask for his permission. “Absolutely not. It will be like I’m betraying Grace.” 

“Seriously? That’s your excuse.” Jake reacts, raising an eyebrow pointedly.

“Wouldn’t you feel as if you’re betraying Logan?” Aleister challenges and Jake just scoffs mockingly.

“Me and Princess got an understanding. Trust me.” Jake lies a little bit at the same time they kind of do. They always have. Even if Jake let Logan know, she’s probably gonna be okay with it. 

The ongoing argument is interrupted by a soft bark echoing from the ground and into the ears of the members of this weird bachelor party. Jake spots Furball curling up by his foot and a smirk immediately crosses his lips when he finds him. Furball has a choice which party he wanted to attend and he ended up going to Jake so this is where he ended up. Recently, it’s been like Jake is Furball’s all time favourite and they’re developing a real special bond. It’s cute.

Jake squats down so his finger can gently stroke the little fox’s teal fur and that gives Jake an idea. “Ok... this is it. The fox has the final say.” He declares in a proud tone and everyone around seems to nod along, all besides Aleister.

“What? That’s preposterous.”

“You have no say, Malfoy. Animal rights are talking now.” Jake pushes Aleister’s out the way completely and blocks his protests out. All that’s left is for Furball to announce his opinion. Jake turns to Furball with hope but also certainty because he knows he won’t be betrayed. “So Furball... ready to lose your innocence by going to a Vegas Strip Club?”

With no hesitation, Furball responds with an eager yelp. “Mmmmrf!!!l” With that, he crawls up Jake’s back and props himself up on the pilot’s shoulder, smiling widely. 

“Then it’s settled, kids.” 

Having much more fun than they were before, the girls have taken the bachelorette party to one of Vegas’ finest strip clubs. They’re all gathered around a booth, sipping on champagne and enjoying the sights before them. Grace is a little uncomfortable but she’s lightening up the longer they’re there. Meanwhile, the rest of them are having the actual time of their lives, especially Zahra. Everyone is starting to feel the alcohol now. 

“Can I tell you guys something?” Michelle suddenly asks, a slight shakiness in her voice. It’s extremely obvious that the alcohol is starting to get to her head and she’s not even the lightweight, she’s just had a lot more than any of the others.

“Sure.” 

Michelle forms a crooked half-smile and holds up her glass eagerly. “How about we make a toast and also an agreement that Sean is an absolute ass?” 

“Wow, Meech. Didn’t take you long to point that out.” Zahra scoffs, her dark eyes roaming over all the pretty sights before. Following her gaze, Quinn can’t help but let out a humoured giggle, not able to hold it in. Zahra catches the sound of her laughter and raises an eyebrow questioningly. “What?”

“You do realise you have a boyfriend right?” Quinn points out and rightfully so. “Pretty sure he wouldn’t appreciate you eye-fucking those strippers like that.” 

Zahra just scoffs mockingly. “You kidding? Craig would love it.”

“Kinda sure that doesn’t signal a healthy relationship, Z.” Logan counters, chugging down half of her champagne and pressing her lips together in order to contain the bitter aftertaste. 

“What can you say, Mercy? Would Jake want you sniffing around strip clubs?” Zahra retorts, folding her arms in a confident manor. 

Logan smirks at the comment, an unreadable look in her ocean eyes. “Me and Jake have an understanding.”

“Ok, all of you need to calm down. This is about Grace remember.” Estela calms the situation and raises her glass, gesturing to Grace with a faint smile. “To the guest of honour! And let’s hope that her marriage to Aleister is enough to make him at least a little more fun.” Everyone laughs along at Estela’s words and join in raising their glasses. 

“Aw, thanks guys. You’re all crazy but I really do love you all.” Grace performs a little speech and that’s when everyone clinks their glasses together. It really is memorable when they all hang out together, especially for a special occasion such as this. They’re all there to watch one of their best friends get married and it’s truly a great chance for them to bond. 

“You should. We’re amazing.” Zahra points out proudly, a smug smile on her face as she lowers her glass.

“Holy shit... guys look.” Estela’s voice interrupts the heartfelt moment, as her dark eyes widen at another sight. Curiously, everyone follows the brunette’s gaze, only to find a familiar group entering the strip club. 

“Oh no...” Grace reacts, covering her face with her hands out of shame. “Aleister is not gonna like this.”

“Well it looks like they had the same idea.” Logan points out, shaking her head at the sight of the guys standing at the entrance of the strip club and you’d expect to look a lot messier than they actually do. Jake looks so damn guilty. This has to be his idea. “Jake has gotta be the mastermind behind this.”

“So basically, you’re both as bad as each other.” Quinn counters, hiding her smirk behind her glass but Logan still manages to spot it anyway. 

“Jake knows what he should and shouldn’t do and at least he’s actually making Aleister have fun.” 

Michelle throws her head back and scoffs at that. “Ha! Aleister doesn’t look like he’s having fun at all.” 

“That’s because he hasn’t had a single drop of alcohol.” Estela points out, gesturing to Aleister with her glass. “Trust me... he’d be much paler.”

While everyone is discussing the current state of the guys, Logan surveys them carefully, trying to resist the urge to laugh at them. But her cover is blown when she locks eyes with Jake, who finally spots her and immediately a natural smirk crosses his lips. Of course, he’s smug about it already. 

“Oh fuck...” Logan mutters under her breath and nudges Quinn as discreetly as possible, a lot harder than she intended. 

“What the hell, Lo?”

“The guys have spotted us.” Logan tells Quinn, slight panicky about what their cocky reactions might be. It will be unnecessary but it will happen. Then it just gets worse. “Shit. They’re coming over.” 

Logan leans back in the velvet booth as she notices Jake and the guys are starting to pace over towards the girls. Clearly they’ve been skeptical and suspicious about why the girls are there just as much as they were about the guys. Now it’s come down to some sort of face off and this is just bound to get awkward, especially with Aleister following behind with an icy expression fixed on his face. It’s obvious he isn’t happy to see his soon-to-be-wife messing around at a strip club and she’s clearly having fun as well, which only makes the tension worse.

After what seems like forever, the boys reach the girls and both parties look like they’ve been caught red-handed, which they have. You’d expect one of them to be pretending it isn’t their fault but no, everyone looks equally guilty, which means no one has a good excuse.

“Look who we found.” Sean pipes up first, arms folded and an amused look on his face. “Guess you couldn’t handle the no-strippers rule either.” 

Michelle simply narrows her eyes. “You are a little late to the party though.” She retorts, a light scowl on her face but it’s hidden enough that Sean doesn’t notice it. 

“Was this your idea, Al?” Estela chimes in with joking intentions but Aleister merely rolls his eyes, not amused. 

“Obviously not. It was all Jake’s doing.” Aleister responds, shooting Jake the side-eye and at first, you’d think Jake would be more angry at Aleister but no... he’s more proud and only Jake Mckenzie would be proud of such an idea in this situation. 

All eyes move to Logan as Aleister rats Jake out. Her only reaction is a knowing smirk reaching her lips. “Oh really, Jake.” 

“Well ours was all down to Logan.” Grace pipes up, causing Logan to flinch a little, especially when Jake’s smirk only widens at the revelation. 

“Oh really, Princess.” He reacts, folding his arms in a condescending manor and he tilts his head cockily. 

“Oh my god... you brought Furball?!” Logan reacts, gesturing to the little blue fox curled up on Jake’s shoudler with nothing but excitement in his magenta eyes. He’s more excited about this then Aleister ever will be. ““Looks like you got into his head Jake.”

“He was the true mastermind.” Jake admits, high fiving Furball proudly.

“Ok... since you’re all here and we got booze and strippers around us...” Zahra begins and everyone suddenly realised what exactly she’s getting at. “...how ‘bout we combine these two parties into one?” 

“That’s... not a bad idea. Pretty sure it’s too late to go to another strip club anyway.” Jake jokes and he seems to be the only one who’s laughing at his comment. 

“This is just... madness! Can’t we just give up and end this little waste of time?” Aleister protests for the millionth time. He’s sulking like a mere child now. 

“Aleister, hunny. I mean this in the nicest way...” Michelle begins, easing Aleister into her comment. “You’re being so annoying and we don’t really care for your opinion.”

“Then looks why we’re gonna compromise.” Logan confirms, raising her glass once more. “To not getting too drunk.” 

“Hey! At least wait until we got shots before you toast.” Craig interrupts Logan before she can perform a toast.

Just as that is mentioned, Vaaryn comes bounding around the corner with a tray of around twelve glasses. Damn... good timing. He looks extremely proud of himself but also a little clueless like he has been this entire time.

“Holy shit! Blue Bro got shots!” Craig exclaims excitedly, his hands rising in one swift motion and he leaps out from the booth, heading for the tray of shots like a cheetah chasing prey. 

“Is that what they are? I was standing beside them before and this man in a bow tie asked me to fill them up and bring them to a table.” Vaaryn explains and everyone’s eyes widen at what he just implied. 

“So wait... you stole them?” 

“I am no thief. I did what I asked. I brought them to a table.” Vaaryn corrects and most seem on board with that idea. 

“I’m liking Avatar’s logic.” Jake points out, stroking his jaw thoughtfully before he sneakily swipes one of the shots. “I say we toast now. Go ahead, Princess.” 

Everyone grabs a shot while Logan clears her throat, preparing for her toast. “As I was saying... to not completely ruining our lives tonight.”

“And to a night we’ll easily forget.” Michelle adds and everyone laughs along. 

That light-hearted comment seems like a really good laugh at that moment. An easy joke that passes everyone by. Little do they know, that forgotten statement... is about to become a reality when morning arrives. Besides... no one can escape Vegas. 

trust me... the next part gets even weirder

[realityhelixcreates]

Lasabrjotr Chapter 5: Slow Whirl

Chapters: 5/? Fandom: Thor (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe Rating: Teen And Up Warnings: Some Medical Stuff, Gun Mention, Alcohol Mention, Kidnapping Mention, Mild Violence Relationships: Loki X Reader Characters: Loki (Marvel), Thor (Marvel), OFC, Heimdall (Marvel), Brunnhilde/Valkyrie (Marvel), Iron Man, Captain America, Doctor Strange Additional Tags: Loki and Tony Stark Do Not Get Along, Loki And Steven Strange Do Not Get Along, Heimdall and Steve Rogers Have Had Enough of This Crap, Valkyrie is Always Ready to Throw Hands, It’s Too Goddamn Cold In Iceland Summary: Meeting your heroes never goes as you expect.

You opened your eyes to an unfamiliar ceiling, having no idea what time it was. The window in your bedroom always spilled sunlight into your face in the morning, making sure that you woke up bright and early. The window in this room, however, was not placed to allow that to happen. You hoped your sleep schedule wouldn’t slip too much.

Someone had been into the room while you slept. There was a bathrobe-green-draped over the back of the chair, and breakfast was set out on the desk. That was where all the sunlight was, and you wanted to bask in it before whatever else was in store for you that day. So you stripped off the tunic, which you had slept in, slipped into the oversized robe, and sat down to eat.

There was very thick oatmeal with raisins, which was familiar and welcome, a glass of apple juice, another little pot of not-yogurt, topped with a red jam that you instantly fell in love with, a buttered slice of nearly black bread, and a tiny shot glass only partly filled with what turned out to be fish oil.

That seemed a little bit gross to you, but you guessed it was some kind of health supplement. You were so much further north than you’d ever been, and you knew sunlight could get a bit scarce at these kinds of latitudes. You gulped it down first, washing the taste away with a swig of apple juice, then tucked into the rest.

This was the first time in months that you had woken up feeling alive. You hadn’t noticed how hungry you were, how much weight you had lost in that time of barely being able to eat. You almost couldn’t wait until lunch.

You found your work clothes neatly folded up outside your door. They had been washed, and it looked like they might have even been ironed. You scooped them up and headed for the bath, hoping it wasn’t occupied.

Freshly washed, fed, clothed, and feeling healthier than you had in so long, you tried to leave the suite, but the young guard was there to stop you again.

“Yuu stae heer.” He said slowly. At your reaction, he shyly held out a little English phrasebook.

“Oh.” Well, wasn’t that sweet of him? “Okay. Yes.”

You headed back inside, once again scouring the library for something you could read. You had very little luck, but you did find some loose paper and pencils, so you passed the time trying to copy some of the illustrations you had found the day before. You used to be good at this kind of thing, but it had been some time since you’d had the energy.

“You’re even noisier when you draw.” Loki drawled. You jerked your pencil in surprise, completely ruining the line.

“Aw dang it!” You exclaimed. “I was doing so well too!”

He stepped closer to examine your work.

“I’m a bit rusty.” You said defensively. “It’s been half a year since I could get any practice in.”

“Come with me.” He commanded, completely disregarding what you were saying.

“You left your manners at the door, I see.” But you left your drawing behind, and followed him anyway.

He led you to a place that had ‘doctor’s office’ written all over it. So this was how the study of your hand started, was it? Well, a medical examination was probably best, as long as dissection wasn’t involved.

Loki handed you over to a tall, gentle-looking lady, with a command to do whatever she told you. Then he left.

“Uhhh, shouldn’t he be here?” You wondered aloud, as the door closed behind him.

“Would you really want him to watch me give you a physical?” The lady asked, her voice soothing, but sounding amused.

“Oh, geez, no thanks. I don’t know him that well!”

“I thought not. Now, undress and then up on the table. My name is Bjarkhild.”

“_____. I’m glad there’s someone else I can actually talk to.” You said, complying with her commands. “I’m afraid I don’t speak your language.”

“Oh, I’m not the only one.” She said. “After it became known that his Majesty had become interested in Midgard, it became something of a fashion to take an interest as well. I know several Midgardian languages.”

“Um, I’m sorry, but what’s Midgard? Is that what you call Earth?” You had thought she was just going to examine your hand, but she gave you a full, professional physical check-up. You hadn’t had one in years.

“Are you supposed to be doing this much?”

“Even if I wasn’t, I would anyway.” She assured you. “Even royalty may not harness a healer. You have been very sick, haven’t you? I was told to perform any and all health related procedures that you might need or request.”

“I can’t pay for that.” You said without thinking about it. It was something you had said so often that it was practically second nature by now. She gave you a curious look.

“Oh, right.” The king had promised to take care of you. Obviously, he meant it. “Do you have a dentist? Can I even get an eye exam? Allergy medication? An IUD? ”

“I’m going to have to look up that last one, but I’m sure we can provide. I have all day with you, if need be.”

Most of the day passed before you left the medical area, a little sore, but feeling better, cleaner, and safer than you had in years. Bjarkhild had barely even bothered with your hand, just asking you if it hurt, and checking the brand for possible infections. Mostly, she just wanted you to eat more, which you had readily agreed to.

Loki was in the waiting area, going through a pile of paperwork.

“That took forever.”

You shrugged. “It’s been like, six years since I had any kind of checkups. There was a lot of work to do.”

“Well, that’s item one checked off.” He gestured to a plate of sandwiches on the table next to his papers, and you fell on it ravenously. The dark bread they used around here tasted very strongly, but you could absolutely get used to it.

“What’s next for today?” You asked between bites.

“Well, I have to finish this.” He said, shaking a handful of papers. “I got a little behind while I was ill. Then, I suppose my brother will probably want to contact a few people, to let them know where you are. I did sort of kidnap you, after all. At least, that’s how your people will see it. We know better. What did Bjarkhild say about your hand?”

“Only that the brand doesn’t go deeper than the skin, and that it’s a magical burn, so it isn’t able to get infected, or open back up, or effect the flexibility of my hand. So that’s all good news.”

He nodded, gathering his papers. “Shall we move this all to a more appropriate place? The lady healer can be impatient with people who do not need her services.”

“Is there maybe another library in the building?” You asked.

“Oh, yes. Here, carry this and follow me.” He handed his paperwork off to you, but after all the good news you’d just received, you didn’t really mind. It wasn’t any heavier than a box of frozen bread dough, after all. “Do you mind if I do a little preliminary experimentation? Nothing too in-depth just yet, just a few things we both need to know.”

“I guess so.” You said. “Gotta start learning about it sometime.”

There were many more people in this area of the building. You figured out which ones were guards pretty quickly; they all wore the same style of helmet. The others came and went around you, giving obeisance to their prince, and giving curious stares to you. One of them relieved you of the stack of papers, and you sure hoped they were the right person to take them.

This library was a busy place, louder than you were used to a library being, but Loki led you to an empty corner, after waving away several offers of help. A simple wave of his hand conjured several objects onto the table between you. A small notebook, a thin piece of metal, and a scrap of leather. You gasped at the show of magic. You’d never seen anything like that in person before. You poked the leather, just to make sure it was really there. You thought you heard Loki chuckle, but when you looked back up at him, his expression hadn’t changed.

“Put your hand on the table, palm up.” He commanded, and you did. He held his hand up over yours. “I am not going to touch it, but I want to see how close I can get before it activates. Tell me if you feel anything.” You nodded, and he lowered his hand slowly, inching closer and closer, until you could feel the heat of his palm. “May I touch it?” He asked, and you nodded again. His skin just barely grazed yours, and you felt the buzzing begin. He removed his hand immediately.

“It won’t activate unless we touch. I see.” He flipped the notebook open and began writing. You couldn’t read the runes, but watching him write them was interesting. Like an exotic form of the calligraphy videos people posted on the internet. “So our wellness is dependent upon closeness, but the power transfer requires direct contact. Now I am going to test if contact can be achieved through solid materials.”

He lay a sheet of the notebook paper over your hand, then pressed his palm to it. Nothing happened.

“No.” Scribble. He tugged his sleeve down over his hand, and tried again. Nothing.

“No.” Scribble. He pressed the scrap of metal into your palm and tried again. Still nothing.

“No.” Scribble. Then the leather. Nothing happened for a moment, but you began to feel the buzz, as if from far away, slowly growing. “Interesting. I suppose it counts as skin. Yes, it appears skin contact is necessary. We should get you a pair of heavy gloves.”

Scribble.

“What does it feel like, from your perspective?”

“Well, the first time, it burned pretty badly. Like I imagine what being branded actually feels like. It hurt all the way up my arm. The second time, it didn’t hurt exactly, but it buzzed. Like when your arm falls asleep and you get pins and needles? But without the pain. And it felt tight all over, like I needed to shed my skin and get bigger. It didn’t hurt, but it was overwhelming. Overstimulating. The light got into my eye and made it hard to see.” He seemed to be writing down everything you said. You wondered if you could convince him to make a copy of his notes that you could read. “Do you think it would kill me if you held on for too long?”

“Hm. Possible, but I don’t think so. It’s far more likely that the power would reach a critical point, and discharge in some form. I doubt it would kill you, but you would probably find it extremely unpleasant.”

“Yikes. Let’s maybe not do that then.”

“Very well.” But it looked like he might still be considering it. “How do you feel about dinner?”

“Positively.” You said.

“Bjarkhild has bid you to eat more, hasn’t she?” He said with dry amusement. “That’s her advice to everyone.”

“Eh, she’s right though. I’m not supposed to be this thin. I mean, society would say I ought to be even thinner, but it’s not true. This isn’t a healthy me. I just haven’t been able to eat much these past few months, and now I’m just leeching energy from you I guess? I’ve gotta get my strength back.”

“Were you strong?” There was a touch of teasing in his voice as he stood and led you back to the less crowded hallways. The stares followed you. They probably would for some time.

“I could carry two boxes of dough at once.” You bragged. “I’m short, but I’m sturdy.”

“So you’re a drudge.” Still teasing.

“Is that fancy talk for modern peasant? Because you’re not exactly wrong, but still…rude.”

“Are you ashamed of what you are?” He asked, no longer teasing. You sighed.

“I don’t know. I’m not sure I can really explain on the spot like this. Give me some time to find my words?”

He nodded, and a beautiful, armored woman appeared in front of you both, so suddenly that you nearly walked right into her. Loki stopped short, and while he didn’t exactly back up, he did shift his weight away from her.

“Hello.” She said. “Arm yourself.”

“They’re here already?” He asked.

“Almost. Is this her?”

“Hi.” You said, a little shyly. She seemed tense, but you were also instantly impressed by her. “I’m _____. Um, pleased to meet you?”

“Brunnhilde. What weapon can you wield?”

“Uhhhh, I can shoot a gun?” This was still the most normal conversation you’d had today.

“That’s impressive.”

“Not really.” You protested. “Everyone I know can shoot a gun. I don’t have one.”

“Here.” Loki pressed a small knife into your hand. You hadn’t seen where he’d gotten it from. “Don’t engage anyone unless you absolutely have to. Stay close to me. If you have to use that, do not be merciful. There are some very powerful beings among our enemies.”

“Are we going into battle?” You squeaked the last word. “I don’t know how to fight!”

“Stay close to me.” He commanded. “Brunnhilde, will you also-“

“Yeah, yeah. Shield the princess. I don’t mind.”

The three of you exited the building through a back entrance, weaving through evacuated streets. Loud noises echoed amid skeletal buildings, until you reached their source. As you approached, you saw Thor pick himself up off the ground, bellowing orders for the man from the fens to hold off.

Said man-Heimdall, Thor called him-had his sword drawn, a blade as long as you were tall, and was sternly facing down the attackers.

That was Iron man.

That was Captain America.

That was suddenly very bad. You definitely couldn’t fight Captain America. He was your hero!

“All right.” Iron Man announced from up in the air. “First of all, she owes me twenty five bottles of scotch. Second of all, return the girl you stole right now! This ain’t the Viking age, we don’t abduct women over the seas anymore!”

“Are you all right Miss?” The Captain called out to you.

“Um, I’m actually fine.” You answered back. “Can…Can we not do this? I think there’s been a misunderstanding.”

“We’ve seen the security footage, Miss. Whatever he’s convinced you to say, you don’t have to worry anymore.”

“He’s an old man, my dear, and he’s gone as deaf as one.” Loki growled.

“Hey, that’s the soul of my nation you’re talking about! And he’s right about that footage being pretty damning. For all intents and purposes, you kidnapped me.”

“Saved you.” He reminded.

“And what do you think it looks like on film? You already said you knew it would look bad!”

The growing argument between Thor and Iron Man escalated into a full blown fight, causing Brunnhilde to leave your side for his. Repulsor blasts were so much louder in person. You cringed at the noise, and Loki shoved you behind him, standing firmly between you and any stray blasts or debris. Captain America and Heimdall both looked completely exasperated, rushing to try and contain the damage.

You felt a sudden touch, and whirled to stare into a window to another place. A hole in the world framed by orange sparks, out of which reached an actual fantasy wizard. He grasped your hand in one leather glove, the other bringing a finger to his lips in a shushing gesture.

You felt the burning buzz begin, as if from far away, fighting to reach through the glove and into you. The wizard looked startled; his grip faltered and you yanked you hand away.

“No!” You shouted, slashing the little blade at him, but missing badly. “Don’t touch me!” You couldn’t let it happen again.

“Shit.” The wizard hissed, and the window in the world closed, right as a thrown dagger passed through the place it had just been.

“Yes, run!” Loki snapped. “You aren’t welcome in Asgard you two-bit, amateur-“ A deflected blast rocked you both off your feet. He scooped you up when you couldn’t recover as quickly as he could, holding you close to his chest.

“Are you injured?” He demanded. You shook your head.

“A human shield, Reindeer Games? That’s a new low, even for you!” Iron Man exclaimed.

“All right, that’s enough!” You shouted. “Stop fighting! You-“ You pointed at Stark, still up in the air. “Land! Everybody shut up and listen! I’m the one you came here for, right? So let me talk!”

You stormed away from Loki, placing yourself about halfway between sides.

“Come on home now.” The Captain said. “Your father is worried sick.”

“You talked to my dad? Well, that’s good. He knows I’m ill. Didn’t he tell you?”

“Yes. That’s part of why he’s so worried, and why we’ve personally come to collect you.”

“Okay, well that’s what I need to explain to you. I’m here because of my illness. I’ve been offered an…experimental medical treatment. Since none of the doctors I saw could tell me anything about my illness, I’ve decided to accept the offer. And it’s doing great, see! Yesterday, when that footage was taken, I couldn’t even stand up on my own. The prince had to come and get me unannounced like that because my condition had deteriorated so badly that it had become an emergency. I intended to contact people about it as soon as I could. Will you tell my dad that? I’m really sorry about all the confusion, so can we stop throwing weapons and energy beams at each other now?” You pleaded.

“Is this true?” The Captain asked Thor.

“It is.” He confirmed. “She is our guest for the duration of her treatment.”

“And how long will that be?”

“Well…” You said. “We aren’t quite sure. It is experimental, after all.”

“We want you to check in with us once a week.” The Captain said.

“Done!” Thor agreed.

“Cap, you can’t be serious.” Iron Man began.

“I don’t think she’s lying.” The Captain stated. “Though I wonder when Asgard decided to extend this kind of charity?”

“We were going to start with just this one case, and see how it was received.” Loki said. “Poorly, it seems.”

You wondered if it counted as a lie if he never said that they didn’t ever plan to have any more cases. Who knows, maybe they did plan to extend medical services to people, just much farther in the future.

“How did you think that specifically you teleporting a girl out of her workplace with no word on what was going on was going to be received well?” Iron Man exclaimed.

Loki shrugged. “I can’t stay isolated out here forever.”

“Oh, yes you can!”

“Okay, are we cool?” You asked. “I can’t go back home just yet: I’ll die. But I’m perfectly happy giving you regular check-ins, and since it seems like his Majesty agrees as well, I think we have an arrangement. Does that sound good? I hope so, because I’m getting really cold out here! The rest of you may be alien gods, or wearing advanced technology; I’ve got a polo shirt and khakis.”

“Right, of course.” Loki said, taking your elbow and leading you back toward the town. “We need to get you a coat. I’m taking her back inside now, that she might not catch her death again.” He announced.

“Please tell that wizard I’m sorry, but he scared me.” You said.

“Hey, hey, hey!” Iron Man called. “I didn’t agree to anything! You!” He pointed at Thor. “You stick around. We need to talk!”

“Keep walking and do not look back.” Loki muttered softly. “Really? An experimental medical procedure?”

“Well it kinda is, isn’t it? I didn’t lie.”

“Oh that’s precious. You’re practicing wordplay.”

“Bought us some time, didn’t it?” He couldn’t disagree, so he just led you straight back to your room, and had dinner brought to you.

[daryldamnson]

Bucky Barnes Headcanons: pining for you

This is basically just adorable pining Bucky.

This was not requested so idk why I did this when I have so much writing to do that was requested months ago but, y’know, shit happens.  Enjoy anyway!  P.S. this is the first piece of bucky writing I’ve ever posted so… exciting but also terrifying??

In my world everyone forgave everyone at the end of civil war and now everyone lives together and bucky still gets to live his best life w/o his left arm (bc that was obvi his choice when he was living in wakanda so why not here too?) and iw never happened bc i refuse.

Bucky would be the first to admit that he was no longer smooth when it came to dating

while he may once have had a way with women (and occasionally men)

this was something that had been lost long ago

and honestly he hadn't really had much use for it anyway recently

romance wasn’t exactly on the forefront of his mind

until he met you

and then suddenly he was praying for his long lost skill to come back

at least a little

because honestly?

his game was lacking so. badly.

When you first met him Bucky was on the better side of recovering

he’d accepted that he could never be as he once was

and he was well on his way to healing and becoming a new person

someone he wanted to be

someone he was ready to be

Bucky Barnes 2.0

and right off the bat he’d thought you were attractive

and funny

and smart

and goddamn were you attractive

which meant that he was a little quiet at first

a little nervous

a lot insecure

he’d do things like angle himself so that you couldn’t see his left side

keep his head down so that his hair covered his face

look at you only when you couldn’t see him

basically just tried to make himself invisible

but because he was all new & improved

he decided to work through this properly

and eventually spoke his insecurities and his “I’m not good enough”s and his “I don’t deserve love”s through with his therapist

and came out mulling over the thought that maybe

just maybe

after everything he’d been through

he did deserve love

and maybe he was actually ready for it

So after two months of stilted conversation, averted eyes and hidden feelings

Bucky Barnes decides to give it his best shot at romancing you

And that was when he realised that he wasn’t quite as smooth as his memory suggests he used to be

despite his best efforts he still seemed to become mute around you

sometimes because he was too busy admiring you to come up with a whole structured sentence at the same time

seriously, how could he be expected to when you looked like that?

sometimes because he’d try to speak

and end up mumbling or stuttering

which just made him feel embarrassed so he closed ranks again

but mostly just because he was so nervous that he was going to fuck it up

and he figured that if he didn’t say anything

then he couldn’t ruin anything

right?

not only did it turn out that he couldn’t speak

but apparently he had absolutely no control over his remaining limbs

he dropped things left and right when you were around

cups were elbowed off tables

chairs were walked into and subsequently knocked over

steps were stumbled over

once he even managed to walk head-on right into steve

and hell if sam didn’t rip him to shit over it for weeks afterwards

he hadn’t even known it was possible for one to be so clumsy when they were all pumped full of super serum

and yet here he was

(what he didn’t know was that you found his clumsiness entirely endearing)

Bucky made the drastic mistake of hinting that he needed help to Steve and Sam

Steve only made a couple of jibes before seriously making an effort to help

you were friends with steve so he could give bucky tips

flowers he knows you like

your favourite kind of chocolate

TV shows he knows you watch

film genres that you saw the most at the cinema

restaurants that you raved about

even small things like your favourite colour

bucky used this information to the best of his ability

aka he may or may not have bought 12 new tshirts in that colour as well as two pairs of sweatpants

Sam however

Sam was significantly less helpful

ie he laughed his ass off

made a few glib remarks about bucky’s helplessness

and shrugged “i don’t know man I can honestly say I’ve never been in your situation - a centenarian tryna seduce someone a quarter their age”

a couple of hours after that sam comes to him and gives him some real advice

(after ensuring that no one would ever know that it was possible for him to be so nice to bucky)

“you gotta get off your ass, man, and let her know that you want her.  you can’t expect her to choose you if she doesn’t know you’re an option.”

Sam’s advice really hit home

and Steve’s was exceptionally useful in helping him ‘get off his ass’ and put a plan into action

Bucky Barnes is bisexual, let’s be real here, he deffo seduced men and women alike back in the olden days.

This will be followed by another set of headcanons at some point in the future (bc this was getting long so I figured I’d make a separate post) wherein Bucky confesses his feelings and finally (finally) asks you out.  If you wanna be tagged in that, drop me an ask.

I’m in a very Bucky-centric state of mind rn so I’m going to very briefly open headcanon requests for Bucky Barnes only.  I’m only gonna take a few so send them in quickly!

Taglists are open - just drop me an ask if you want to be added!  I have a permanent tag, as well as character tags, fandom tags and series tags.

Perma-tags:  @im-socialy-awkward-no-joke

Bucky Barnes tags:  @poeticbarnes