#that i was the one that killed a zigzagoon in the woods

[caoimhe-from-hoenn]

Purple

What rumors are these??? Speak up, dipshits

[dana-chan-the-control-brain]

The final surviving Team of the Emerald Nuzlocke Disaster!

We are finally here. We took five attempts but we're finally at the E4.

We have:

Pepper the Relaxed Blaziken. Has helped in key fights like the Norman Fight when they were a combusken. The final starter of the fifth attempt. He's carrying the failure of past Runs on his back, but he's overconfident despite not taking down a single gym leader by himself, he's been with us since the start. Underused, but since he's the starter, he believes every victory was something he personally did. He carries the spirits of past runs of all starters past. We might not remember them all, but Pepper does, and he's determined to see them win. A little overconfident, but hoping he will take us far. Brickbreak, Bulk Up, Quick Attack, BlazeKick

Blueberry the Serious Milotic. A huge investment in a Nuzlocke for sure. It took about a full week to properly catch and to evolve Blueberry from when he was a little Feebass in the pond. An investment fairly worth it even despite the Gyarados Manpower we hold. He has been essential in the late game especially for Wionna switching back and forth between him and Rice. He's also a great tank for more difficult opponents. Surf, Icebeam, Recover, Safeguard

Rem the Naughty Gardevoir. An essential "lucky" catch very early on. Completely frail and useless for a lot of the early game, but straight up essential in the late game, especially against Archie and Team Aqua. Swept Juan on their own, Took out a lot of Wionna's flying types until Altaria came out. A devastating combination moveset. He's been the MVP of the late game and helped out of so many tight spots. Calm Mind, Thunderbolt, Physic, and Hypnosis.

Ziggy the Quirky Zigzagoon. He's been here since the very beginning of the run. Staying in the background and picking up lots of rare candies and essential items for the team to use. He's been the number one cheerleader of the team and hasn't been in too many serious fights. That will change tonight. With access to bellydrum and other powerful moves, he has earned his place to be here at the Elite Four and hoping that he can take out a lot of major threats on his own. Return, Shadow Ball, Substitute, Bellydrum.

Rice the Mild Gyarados. After the fourth failure, I decided to permit Gyarados and she has been endlessly useful. Rice was essential in pivoting between her and Blueberry in order to get a win over on Wionna. A rarity for a Gyarados, she does not prefer fighting. She sees herself more as a supportive role to the team. Utilizing her Intimidate Ability and ground immunity for others to take the kill for her. She's been with us as a small Magikarp since Brawly, and she sees Blueberry as her son. Since she sees a lot of herself in him when he was a Febass. Earthquake, Icebeam, Dragondance, Hyperbeam

Bella the Quiet Breloom. Bella has been with us since Petalburg Woods. A Mushroom of few words, They singlehandly took down Roxanne Early game when we had essentially nothing to work with. They also took down Wattson on their own essentially, after a tragic death from Ninja the Shedninja. Bella has also dealt with the MOST close calls out of any long lasting team member. We couldn't run from Golbats in the Aqua Hideout twice, and that left Bella with 5hp or less both times. A four times flying weakness is trouble. And Bella is haunted by the close calls and she swears that she actually died to a wild Golbat and saw the afterlife. Her friends assured her that they were there to protect her and she survived, but she can't shake the feeling that she died really anticlimactically to a wild Golbat. But if she's here now, it must be for a reason. And that she's determined to see this through to the end. Sludgebomb, Giga Drain, Sky Uppercut, Leach Seed

The others as this run was a group effort:

Salt the Tailow, defeated Brawly on their own. Was good in the early game. Ditched later for a Gyarados and other stronger teammates. She is Pepper's birdy girlfriend and waiting for him happily in retirement.

Nina the Ninjask was on the team for a short while. Her sister: Ninja the Shedninja was the only death on the entire run, because the Trainer didn't know Watson's Voltorb had Rollout. Ninja talks to her sister and whispers curses on the winning team, hoping that this fifth run will be a failure, because they were not cared for. Ninja and Nina live in the beach house in Retirement.

Bruce the Sharpedo and Disaster the Absol. They were the tag team pair that completely swept Tate and Liza. They had great synergy and Disaster and Bruce spent a much happy retirement in the box after the business with Groudon and Kyorgre was handled. Natural Disasters cause Disaster the Absol to break out in panic attacks, but Bruce keeps her safe and calm. The two became close and will likely have many shark puppies after this. However, the two don't yet realize that Sharpedo's breeding group is a very shallow pool, and he is actually infertile. They will go to an adoption center in Sinnoh and Adopt a Gible. Perhaps... maybe in the not so distant future, they hope a young trainer might be willing to train their child and have them go on their own pokemon adventure.

Mr.Meep the Girafarig. He is here. He did nothing. Okay that's unfair. He was caught in the Saffari Zone and brought to the Tate and Liza fight for backup if something went wrong, but Bruce and Disaster just clicked right away and Mr.Meep didn't need to do anything. He still gets retirement cus he was raised and he was super supportive and ready to lay down his life for anyone he needed to.

Boulder the Graveler. He never became a Golem like he always dreamed he would be. Boulder was an unwanted catch, taking place of the Dessert encounter as a rocksmash guy. But he honestly proved himself. He stood as a wall in the way of Flannery and was an essential wall in really big Aqua and Magma stuff. He was also super useful as a pivot for Norman with his rock hard defense. He always wished he could have been a Golem so he could break out of his rock-egg shell, but he is really content with how he helped us acheive the Basic and Flame badge so he went into retirement there soon after.

Athena the Manetric. Also did nothing. Okay, unfair, a strong fast Electric type was useful in a lot of the team Aqua fights and Archie fight. They were also good backup for Wionna and Juan, but we never really used her. She was just chilling in the back, waiting if Rem, or Blueberry couldn't pull through. Thankfully, we never needed her. She was great in being our essential backup "go-to" Electric type.

RootRoot the Lileep. They weren't in any major fights. They're a lover, not a fighter. A fisherman. With their suction cup ability, they're the reason we even got a Milotic in this run at all. They were just the fisherman to help us catch a feebass and for that, they are honored and remembered.

NOT DRAWN CUS I FORGOT:

Coolio the Tentacool! RICE'S PARTNER. The two grew up around dewford town and were inceperable as a tentacool and Magikarp. They grew up on the team together and Tentacool helped us through a lot of fights. They actually were the ones who Swept Flannery all on their own as a tentacool! Which was impressive! (I misremembered so I think Boulder took the credit) They were an essential member of the team for awhile and I feel so bad I forgot to draw them. They are waiting for their beloved Rice when she gets back from the Champion.

[ursarangler]

h. ello .

my name is dominique. we are related but that does not matter. i have questions for you .

i am very interested in the strange and unexplained events happening in the regions . i find them very neat . i want to learn more about them as i grow up and. i heard that you went through stuff like that.

i am sorry that happened to you . but also what happened in full . what was celebi like . did you see a. zigazagoon. thank you

thank you for answering my questions . i think you should get more sleep.

— 🎧🐾

▓▒░U(''°ᴥ°'')U░▒▓ hey, kiddo! Please don't tell random strangers online that you're related to them with no context!! I'm not mad at you, I just want you to know that you could really scare the life out of a fella doing that!!

For your questions though σ(￣ᴥ￣ʋ⁠) I wouldn't say I've been through much unexplainable stuff. Really, most of it's just the result of a bunch of men with big egos fucking around and finding out. I did experience some odd things growing up in Unova, though!! U⁠^⁠ｪ⁠^⁠U Lots of strangeness in the woods and out in the more rural parts! I can't remember a lot of it, long ago as it was, but one thing I remember is when I was out at a friend's farm late at night. We were out looking for bugs out by the Torchic coops, and suddenly, the Torchics went all quiet. Next thing I know, there's a whistling coming from in the coops. ▼⁠・⁠ᴥ⁠・⁠▼ I had a bad feeling about all of it, but my friend wanted to make sure there wasn't something in there killing all the mons, so he just tells me to go get his ma and pa, picks up a big stick, and charges on in there.

Kid's been a missing person's case for about fifty years now.

Anyways! U⁠^⁠ｪ⁠^⁠U what happened with the Celebi!!

First off, it put up one hell of a fight!! O-(`ᴥ´Q)/ That's to be expected and all I suppose, being a mythical mon! The psychic armor worked a bit, but I still got tossed around a good bit and not to mention the whole U(”⁠ ⁠⊚ᴥ⊚⁠ ⁠”)U time travel thing. But! V⁠●⁠ᴥ⁠●⁠V like I said! The little critter had no physical strength! The moment I got my teeth around the fucker's head, it was over.

I saw Zigzagoon in the past, but they looked kinda... Different? U(⁠・ᴥ・⁠;⁠)U They looked closer to the kinds they got in Galar, but not quite the same. Weird as all get out. I wasn't really paying much mind to them though because I think I showed up in the middle of a war. I'm not sure what they were fighting about. Couldn't understand a word of what their leader said to me. Shit felt like touching down in Kanto all over again. U⁠ ⁠´⁠꓃⁠ ⁠`⁠ ⁠U A damn mess, really. All I knew was they saw me kill a mythical and figured I'd be of use to their side. They were dressed in red, the other side was dressed in blue. I wound up helping them win a crucial battle and took a fair chunk of the blue leaders out in the process. All in all, I think it took a month or so, but I lost track of time real damn quick. It was just so easy to lose myself out there. The pokemon and I fought the same. Claws and teeth. We don't fully grasp our handlers, but we know we have to fight. Destroy. The praise that rained on me when their necks broke. Ain't I the weapon they needed? The weapon to end them all? Am I not death?

▼⁠・⁠ᴥ⁠・⁠▼ where was I going with this?

Oh! U⁠^⁠ｪ⁠^⁠U They gave me an egg for my efforts! All the best fighters over there had big ol' beastly pokemon by their sides so I suppose they wanted me to keep the fella. U(⁠*⁠´ᴥ｀⁠*⁠)U Be kind of rude to turn the ol' fellas down now, huh? It hasn't hatched yet, but I'm keeping a close eye on it.

After all that, they invited me to some sort of star festival. Something about a pokemon that wakes up once every some odd years? ▼⁠・⁠ᴥ⁠・⁠▼ Figured I'd oblige. While I was there, I saw this little creature taking in energy from the stars. Something... Compelled me to speak to it. I don't know what. I figured it could hear me.

I asked it to take me home.

U⁠^⁠ｪ⁠^⁠U And now we're here!! Anyways, hope this answers things!! It's a bit of a long story, but I suppose you don't seem the type to mind the ramblings of an old man. U(⁠ ⁠´⁠◡ᴥ⁠◡⁠`⁠)U

[midnight-coffeebreak]

gonna try to start posting about my Alpha Sapphire Nuzlocke I mentioned earlier

it's actually going decently! I'm having fun with it, despite a couple deaths that affected me

here's the rules I'm following, the rest will be under the cut (and future posts will be tagged with #AsciiMon Alpha)

So here I am, starting an Alpha Sapphire Nuzlocke. it's the easiest game to Nuzlocke according to the internet, so what's the worst that could happen :)

he didn't know what would happen later on in the run

so I got my Mudkip, named him Pringle, and the run officially started! ...and then I realized I didn't get pokeballs until later, so I had to backtrack a bit when I did (apologies for not having many screenshots from Early Run)

first encounter that wasn't my starter was a Zigzagoon! I named him Utz, like the chip company. it goes with Pringle, ok

this is also around the time I created The Graves for my dead Pokemon to go into. Surely nobody major would end up there, right? RIGHT!?

eventually on Route 102, I got a Poochyena that I creatively named Shadow. "ooh, what a nice early game encounter!" I thought, before I immediately encountered a Ralts that I could no longer get because Nuzlocke Rules.

back on track, Route 103 gave me Bloop the Wingull! a Pokemon I would come to rely on later in the run

then I met Wally, and saw him get his Ralts, still salty that I didn't have one myself.

after knocking out Rival May, Route 104 got me Pollen The Wurmple, which I was super happy about! Pollen grew to be another pokemon I'd rely on for kills

and then I entered Petalburg Woods, and kept getting dupes for a solid 5 minutes. I kept searching, briefly interrupted by the plot, until I finally found Onion the Slakoth. I never used her. I did so much searching that Pollen actually evolved into Cascoon lmao

(she's still rotting in my boxes)

Route 116's encounter was a Whismur, a find I was super happy about! ...until I immediately killed it trying to lower its health. BUT WAIT, IN RUSTURF TUNNEL, I ENCOUNTERED ANOTHER WHISMUR. AND IT'S TECHNICALLY NOT DUPE CLAUSE BECAUSE I KILLED THE LAST ONE. also I felt nice to myself, so I caught him immediately and named him Xilent (after an EDM artist I like). Xilent went on to also be nicknamed "The Fucking GOAT" because he would tank a lot of hits for me

"this is a really nice team I've got going on! surely we won't lose anyone soon-"

and then Shadow died to a random trainer. our first death of the run (tbh I didn't really feel anything beyond "WELL THEN...")

"BUT SURELY NOBODY IMPORTANT WILL DIE LATER!" those are special surprise words that'll help us later!

Pringle evolved into Marshtomp, and it was time for Roxxane, the first gym of many! to be honest, very clean sweep. I just ran in with Pringle and Xilent, and the first badge was ours with no deaths

took Brawly down easily too, and it was off to Granite Cave to meet up with Steven. in there, I encountered an Abra that I immediately threw a pokeball at... and then it teleported away, making me lose any future encounters

onto Route 110, that encounter was caught! welcome NomNom the Gulpin to our team! surely with him on the team, we can take down the random Team Aqua Grunt encounter coming up, right!? They have a Carvanha, but I'll tank it with Xilent!

...I think this screenshot from when I was live-texting my run sums this up perfectly

YUP. XILENT TANKED A HIT, I TRIED TO HEAL, AND THEN HE DIED RIGHT AFTER. MY SECOND DEATH OF THE ENTIRE RUN, AND IT FUCKING HURT. MY FAVORITE TEAM MEMBER, JUST GONE FROM A GRUNT BATTLE.

getting forcefully sidetracked by Lisia, I got a Cosplay Pikachu that I named Purin. honestly a great free pokemon to get, seeing as she's Level 20 and has three Electric moves

I thought my run was going great! and then May asked to fight me. this fight... oh my god this fight... it almost killed the run.

I lead in with Pollen the Beautifly, "he has Absorb and an Oran Berry! surely he'll survive this fight-" he tanked a Rollout from May's Wailmer, living on 15/51 HP. me, being stupid, thought "NAH, HE'LL LIVE! Pollen, use Absorb!" ...Wailmer got to attack first, and used Rollout again, killing Pollen. my first full evo, and third death of the run. another death that really hurt; I wanted Wurmple for so long, only to see him die at his final evo TO A WAILMER SPAMMING ROLLOUT.

"s-surely Bloop the Wingull can carry the rest of the match!" Bloop got one-shotted by the same move that killed Pollen. only four pokemon left, and I was losing hope. I brought out Pringle as a last ditch effort, and he managed to win the battle. we beat May, but with two deaths that really hurt.

I got Mini the Maril on Route 117, but that encounter wasn't enough to help me cope with the loss of Pollen and Bloop

and that's where I stopped playing for the day. food was coming, and it was getting late.

the current team is looking good though! I'm amazed that I've kept Utz the Zigzagoon for this long. the rest of my team is pretty good too, mainly NomNom the Gulpin and Purin the Pikachu

I'll probably continue playing when I get home. wish me luck on the run!

[theshippywallflower]

Pokémon Nuzlocke Project - Omega Ruby: Part 4 (Heat Badge)

Fourth badge and we have our first casualty in one of the most unfair ways possible.

Here is my team after defeating Flannery.

Details

Starter: Mudkip -> Marshtomp (Gnaeus) Torrent, Naughty - Tackle. Rock Slide, Water Gun, Mud Shot. Scatters things often.

Route 103: Zigzagoon -> Linoone (Galatea) Pickup, Relaxed - Covet, Rock Smash, Pin Missile, Sand Attack. Mischievous.

Route 102: Poochyena -> Mightyena (Tacita) Quick Feet, Adamant - Tackle, Snarl, Sand Attack, Assurance. Likes to relax.

Petalburg Woods: Shroomish -> Breloom (Theocritus) Effect Spore, Quirky - Force Palm, Headbutt, Stun Spore, Leech Seed. Strong willed.

Route 116: Taillow -> Swellow (Ares) Guts, Gentle - Aerial Ace, Double Team, Focus Energy, Quick Attack. Scatters things often.

Fiery Path: Torkoal (Ireneus) White Smoke, Hasty - Withdraw, Rapid Spin, Flame Wheel, Smokescreen. Often lost in thought.

Boxed

Route 101: Beautifly (Idalia) Route 104: Wingull (Kanata)

Rusturf Tunnel: Whismur (Kentaro)

Dewford Town: Magikarp (Shiori)

Granite Cave: Zubat (Euphemia) Route 109: Tentacool (Koios)

Route 117: Roselia (Neoptolemos) Route 112: Numel (Fabia)

Route 113: Spinda (Hyperion)

Route 114: Swablu (Timothea)

Jagged Pass: Machop (Traianus)

Deaths

Minun (Ione)

MVP: Gnaeus

Notes

Minun was killed on Route 113 by Youngster Neal's Trapinch (I was unable to switch out due to Arena Trap)

[pokemonswshbutionlyplayedsword]

I thought of this a long time ago but I never really put much thought into it. It's like a turf au or an apocalypse au I don't really know. But it's like it eternatus wasn't defeated galar went into this state of panic and basically collapsed. Now like everyone's against each other and like galars divided into the cities themselves based on the gym type. So most dragon trainers in hammerlock's and so on. The wild area would be life free war areas just thought it would be a cool postgame thing.

Okay, so I’m kinda new to the idea of turf aus, but I like what I’ve seen so far. As for apocolypse aus??? I love them. Like, a lot. One of my favorite types of aus. And now, Anon, you’ve got me thinkin about it, so sit down and lemme tell ya, cause I’ve got somethin’ to say. And tonight I’m feeling like ranting, so buckle up.

So here’s the plan, you’re on the right track. Eternatus demolishes Galar. There’s no leader that can ease the chaos that’s broken out. The economy is just gone. Wyndon fell apart and every other town was either mostly destroyed or abandoned. Now, what exactly is preventing Galar from putting itself back together? Good question. If you know me, you’ll know that my favorite game is Hollow Knight. In Hollow Knight, the player battles a plague caused by a godlike creature known as The Radiance. The Radiance creates this infection to gather the bugs of Hallownest and restore them to her hive mind (Yeah, I know that’s a lot to take in, but just go play the game. You’ll understand and you’ll also love it because it’s the best game.)

Now, I’m not saying that Eternatus creates a plague of sorts to bend the people and pokemon of Galar to its will, except that is exactly what I’m saying. That is what is happening. No other region can come help them because there’s nothing they can do, and even if there was some way to help, there’s no way for them to know if there’s actually anything left to save at all, and since Galar’s a big island, there’s no way for it to spread, so they’re on their own.

Here’s the vibe. Y’all ever heard of Darkwood? Yeah, another video game. Fantastic, incredible, intense and emotional. Aside from the fear and desperation to survive the night, the players of Darkwood will experience foreboding, hopeless and violent feelings. Protect what is yours and trust no one, essentially. Kill on sight kind of vibes. You know what I mean. And if you don’t, well, go play Darkwood, you won’t regret it. Warning, though, it’s graphic, bloody and can be really gross at times. But, like, that’s the aesthetic of it.

So, as a quick recap, what Eternatus has done: Effectively destroy most of Galar, especially the northern part of it; scorch the earth where Wyndon used to stand; spread plague and disease to technically enslave people and pokemon to only their base, animalistic instincts; and pretty much ruin the lives of the people who weren’t killed by the blast.

And, for the sake of convenience and my poor little heart, let’s say that no one was present for the event. Yes, Eternatus emerged in Hammerlocke, but it wasn’t defeated and it moved to Wyndon, taking possession of Rose Tower before creating the devastating blow that caused Galar to fall. No, no one we know dies, so that’s nice. But Eternatus is gone. There’s no tower to climb. No evil to defeat. No way out of this hell hole. Oh, and dynamorphing is officially cancelled, too.

ANYWAY, here’s where things get interesting. We now get to see what happens to our dear characters.

Milo is in Turffield. It’s a mess, but it’s not the worst place to be in Galar. He was there on his farm when it happened. Almost every plant was wiped out. Most barns were destroyed and the pokemon in them were either released or killed. It was hard, but Milo and his farmhands were able to salvage what was left and create a new, less impressive farm. Still, they have the most reliable food source in Galar. They had to build a lot of defense and acquire a lot of guard pokemon. They had to get really aggressive about defending their things because so many people would try to steal. But they get everything they need by trading with the other mini-societies that formed when the dust settled.

Nessa was in Hullbury. Things are extremely hard, but they’re on the sea, so a lot of the survivors tried to sail away. Nessa stayed, but she did help them try to leave. This was before the plague spread, so it was relatively safe, if not dire. After that, and when things get bad, she finds Sonia and Magnolia, and they go to Turffield to work and get protection. Magnolia definitely needs the sanctuary. Hullbury was abandoned.

Kabu is leading Motostoke the best he can. There are some survivors that follow Kabu, and they keep the production that comes from Motostoke, you know, metal production and shit. Most of Motostoke is abandoned. There’s a line of large warehouses and a nearby grocery store that the people made into a base. They’re a large crowd, but they do well because they’re so close to Turffield. There’s a lot of paranoia, though, because there’s not a lot of room for trust.

Bea is an excellent fighter, of course, so she protects Allister and the rest of the people who stayed in Stow-on-Side. They moved into the cave with the statue of the two kings. It’s so easy to fortify and, in fact, due to their pokemon, and the fact that a lot of people there have the right kind off pokemon, they are able to carve the cave out more and make an actually viable place to stay. They struggle with food a bit because they’re far from any reliable source, but they’ve made it work for their small group. There are very few of them left, so there’s a lot of trust.

Allister stays close to Bea. He’s terrified of what’s happening. He does his best to help, but mostly he stays in and tries to think of ideas. He’s come up with the idea of making tunnels to the other mini-societies. He understands that they survive if they have something worth trading. They have the power to make transportation possible. He’s currently looking for other ideas, too. If they make resources easier to access and they get means to acquire them, they’ll have a better chance of survival.

Opal knows that the woods around Ballonlea are thick and hard to traverse when the proper paths are not kept up. Thus, she has a choice to make. Does she make her town vulnerable or does she isolate herself from any other resources? She chooses isolation. They build into the trees to expand. They’re able to make farms of sorts, but they also forage. The survivors in Ballonlea isolate themselves from the plague and survive by living like the fairies- with the fairies. Most of the outside world don’t know if Ballonlea still exists. Opal knows she likely won’t live to see the end of this situation, she can only hope that she can teach her successor to lead the people of the forest.

Melony sets aside her problems with Gordie to protect her family. She works with Circhester to isolate herself from the rest of Galar. It’s hard to get to Circhester because the event caused the snow to come down harder. That makes resources hard to come by as well, though. The hot spring and a large home that houses the survivors are their stronghold. They’re not worried about being stolen from. However, monthly a group of people have to take their pokemon out and journey to the rest of Galar to trade and get resources. It’s risky, but its their only option. Melony normally leads these expeditions, and Gordie takes over while she’s gone.

Gordie is the second in command in Circhester. He’s the strategist, so to speak. He comes up with the plans. He takes care of everything while Melony is gone. He’s especially protective of his younger siblings. It’s going to be hard to grow up in a post-apocolyptic world. He used to sit around and think of what would happen in this situation, but now that he’s actually here...? He’s completely forgotten about his problems with Melony before the disaster.

Piers counts himself extremely lucky. Spikemuth has walls. It protected everyone within the city from the blast. But the walls are thin and they were already poor to begin with. The thing about Spikemuth is that they’re survivors. They may not specialize in anything, but they scrape by any way they know how. Piers may come off as an apathetic and careless person, but in this disaster, Piers steps up to lead Spikemuth. He fortifies the town with metal from Motostoke, he manages to barter with Milo to get food. They’re on cliffs right next to the sea. Some days it’s an Arceus send, some days it’s another way for Eternatus to laugh at them, but it does bring in food and scavenge sea garbage. In a town full of Zigzagoons, what else do you expect? One of the things they barter with is sending people to be temporary warriors/bodyguards. The people of Spikemuth can mf SCRAP.

Raihan fled from Hammerlocke with the rest of the survivors. They went to find Leon in Wedgehurst. There was nothing left to salvage in Hammerlocke. Some people split off from the main group. Raihan convinced Piers to let them seek refuge in Spikemuth. Some of them joined Milo. A few hoped to find Ballonlea, which wasn’t unheard of. Compared to the rest of the Galar, the rumors sounded like utopia. Raihan still has hope that help is on the way, and he’s used that to lead his people as far as they will go. His pokemon are strong and he can defend himself and his loved ones. He joins Leon in Postwick, where they retreat into the Slimbering Weald.

Leon evacuated Wyndon along with everyone else who was smart enough to leave. He immediately returned to Postwick to join Hop and his mother. The people there were pretty unharmed, since the blast didn’t reach quite far enough. Wedgehurt was abandoned for sure, but that didn’t really matter. They’re close enough to Milo to not have to worry about food so long as people came to help tend to the farms sometimes. Eventually, when things turned even worse than they already were, Leon led Postwick into the Slumbering Weald. With his powerful pokemon, he was sure he could protect them, especially with Raihan at his side. They’ve made themselves a home there, in that Weald, hoping that Zacian and Zamazenta reveal themselves to end this.

Rose is not safe anywhere. The people of Galar hate him for what he’s done, and there’s no one there to listen if he tried to explain himself. He’s not a survivor, he doesn’t know what he’s doing. He and Oleana end up leaving Wyndon with a certain small group headed towards Motostoke. He keeps his head down and his hood up. He wants to find the gym leaders and other authority figures around to make a plan to fix the region, but he can’t do that yet. He doesn’t have the means or the plans to make it happen. He eventually branches off from that path because he has no choice but to follow Oleana. She leads him to Spikemuth, and she convinces Piers to accept them. It’s not easy, but Spikemuth is probably one of the safest places for him now.

Oleana stays with Rose. She calls all the shots, but she protects him at all costs. She knows he never meant for this. She’s a fighter and good at surviving. Through rumors and travelers, she learns that Spikemuth is accepting of all stragglers who need walls to protect them. One of two things happen if she takes Rose. 1. They’ll be killed on sight or 2. Piers will accept them and they’ll be safe. Oleana doesn’t ask Rose, because she knows he’s still in shock and not of right mind right now. She thinks she’ll be able to get through to Piers, they understood each other. Luckily, she’s right, but she has to work extra hard to earn both their keep. She doesn’t exactly mind, since she rises through the ranks quickly and proves to be especially valuable to Piers.

Sonia goes with Nessa to Turffield with her grandmother. She regrets leaving Leon behind, but she had no choice. She had no idea if he was even alive. She hears rumors that he’s leading Postwick, but she can’t make the trip to see for herself. She won’t leave Magnolia behind, even if it means mucking around in Wooloo pens to earn her and her grandmother’s meals. It’s a simple life, not much to it, but she knows she’s extremely lucky. A lot of people never got this far. Plus, Turffield is an empire compared to the rest of Galar, and it’s one of the best places to be since they’re so wealthy there and Milo is so kind.

Magnolia is too old and weak to survive on her own. She knows she’s lucky that her granddaughter brought her with her. Turffield is the perfect place to be for them. Sonia earns both their keeps, so Magnolia lives a very easy life. She’s researching the phenomenon that’s happening, and Milo is happy to let her. She really hopes to find out what happened to everyone and to find a way to end this. She really needs Oleana and Rose to help her, but she thinks they’re dead, so there’s no point in looking for them. She’d go to Wyndon to look for answers, but there’s no Wyndon left to go to.

Hop was terrified when it happened. Luckily, not days after the disaster struck, Leon came home and led them all to the Slumbering Weald. He’s been Leon’s apprentice of sorts. He’s been learning to be a leader like him. He hopes that he’ll be able to help more soon. He misses his friends, and right now, he’s been looking into a communication method without cell phones or electricity.

Marnie is in Spikemuth, as Piers’ second in command. She’s incredibly important because she can see things that Piers can’t. He’s fiercely protective of her, more than he was before. She’s looking for solutions to all of Spikemuth’s problems, and she’s the one that convinced Piers to let Rose and Oleana into Spikemuth. She has been listening to all the rumors and stories that pass through, hoping to hear about anyone she knew.

Bede is in Ballonlea, being taught everything Opal knows. He was the one who suggested building into the trees. Opal’s proud of him, but he knows she worries. Bede doesn’t know how long they can last until they need to make contact with the rest of Galar. He’s stressed about the future and he doesn’t know how to fix any of these problems.

Anyway, the point is, Eternapocolypse AU is a thing now, and I encourage all of you to interact with it. I love apocolypse aus so much. Only post for tonight btw because I’m tired and this took an hour to write out.

[thatbeluga]

Current Happenings in my Pokemon Emerald Nuzlocke

Early Game

Picked out a Mudkip and named it Sashimi

Got a Wurmple I didn’t want and named it Goop

Named a Poochyena after my friend Danny

After Oldale townm, Goop became a Caskoon and I caught a Zigzagoon named Cabbage

Tried to catch a Marrill after Petalburg City but Goop murdered it in cold blood. So no Marrill.

Caugh a Shroomish in the woods and named it Bellend

After that I grinded the team up to level 10 and went into the woods (Goop evolved into Duskoon)

Defeated Team Aqua guy with Sashimi

First Gym: Rock Type

Sashimi blasted through Roxanne’s gym with Water Gun which it learned after defeating Team Aqua

Obliterated her first two Geodudes in one shot and then the lvl 15 Nosepasss came out (At this point Sashimi was lvl 14, he got a lot of experience from murdering all the geodes in the gym).

One shot didn’t kill it, and then it hit him with Rock Tomb and took out a large chunk of his HP

Then I fucked up.

Scared of losing Sashimi, I switched Bellend, (lvl 11) who was immediately blocked from escape. Which meant Bellend, lvl 11, had to defeat a lvl 15 Nosepass.

Super nervewracking battle. Paralyzed it first, then leech seeded it, and then absorbed the shit out of it

He almost died like 20 times but he pulled through. The absorbs and leech seed were the only thing keeping him from being killed by the Rock Tombs. Further complicated by Roxanne continually healing him.

Finally, Bellend killed the Nosepass after the paralysis prevented it from attacking two turns in a row.

Got the Rock badge, and moved on.

Second Gym: Fighting Type

Caught a Nincada named Barb outside Rustboro City. Put her in the PC bc I didn’t want/need her

Caught a Whismur named Nope in the caves. Didn't need either.

Went to Dewford Town, gave steven the letter, caught a Geodude named Pebborah, and put her away too. My team was pretty good!

It was pretty good. In the gym, Cabbage was killed in a surprise double battle by a one-shot from a Machop. It was unexpected, and tragic, and now I know that fighting is super effective against normal.

Had to go train up Nope and Pebborah, even tho both would be useless against Brawly (Fighting is effective against normal and rock).

Leveled Goop up a ton, far over everyone else on the team, because Goop knew Confusion and Gust.

Goop obliterated his team with Gust and Confusion, and got a well deserved vacation after all of the grinding

Third Gym: Electric

You know in the anime how pokemon always evolve after a super tough battle where they almost die? Well that actually happened to Sashimi!

It was in a double battle, outside Slateport, and a series of mistakes led to him almost dying. First, a Wingull used Supersonic to confuse him. Then, the Tentacool poisoned him. And THEN, because of a misclick, Bellend Absorbed him (which was, of course, a super effective move). He was down to 1 health, poisoned, and confused. I thought it was the end of Sashimi.

Thankfully, the opponents did some status moves so I could heal and unpoison Sashimi. And, after the battle, he evolved into a Marshtomp!

Caught Boof the Electrike on 110

Caught Parsley the Magikarp from the sea by Slateport

Added Parsley and Pebborah to the regular team (Pebborah is great against electric types and I want a gyarados).

Unexpected battle with May. Bellend put her Wingull to sleep and murdered it, Sashimi murked her Slugma in one move, and Goop eliminated her Grovyle

Had Parsley at the front of my team so he could mooch of their XP and become a Gyarados (it's... slow going)

to be continued...

CURRENT TEAM: Sashimi (Marshtomp) Goop (Duskoon) Danny (Poochyena) Pebborah (Geodude) Parsley (Magikarp) Bellend (Shroomish)

CURRENT DEAD: Cabbage (Zigzagoon)

CURRENT UNUSED: Nope (Whismur) Barb (Nincada) Boof (Electrike)

[jarmes]

Beating Pokemon Sapphire with (almost) no damaging moves

Last year, I decided to beat Pokemon Leafgreen without using any damaging moves. It was hard, but doable. A few weeks back, I decided to try and find out if you can beat Pokemon Sapphire under the same ruleset. The answer is no. You can’t. It is physically impossible. Let me explain why.

I started the game up, fast-forwarded through the introduction, and chose Mudkip as my starter. Unlike Leafgreen, which features Bulbasaur, one of the best stall Pokemon in Gen 3, all of the starters in Hoenn are terrible for this run, lacking any real way to stall. I went with Mudkip because it’s the most defensive. Tackle is a damaging move, so Mudkip is unable to use anything but Growl. Fortunately, the Poohcheyana is programmed to run away before it beats you.

I named Mudkip GarbageBoyStinkman (technically GBSM because of character limits) and traveled to Route 103 to meet with May. Having no way to deal damage, I ran from all wild Pokemon along the way. Unfortunately, this is the point the run becomes unwinnable.

You cannot beat May without dealing damage. It cannot be done. None of the starters have any moves that can take out opponents through status moves. Now, you may be thinking, what if I caught another Pokemon on the route? Well, you can’t. You can’t buy Pokeballs until after you beat May. And you can’t trade because you only have one Pokemon. We can’t beat May because her Torchic takes us out in a few hits, and we can’t level up before May because all of the wild Pokemon around do the same. So, the run is over. Game over.

Hence the “almost” in the title. Because May is impossible, we’ll try to beat the game without attacking anyone else. It takes four tackles to take out her Torchic. Technically, because criticals do double damage, two criticals could take May out in two hits, setting our minimum attacking moves at two. Getting two crits in a row only happens one percent of the time, but it is possible. I opted for four hits because the battle was already a wash and moved on.

Birch gives us five Pokeballs and we finally have a little breathing room. Our best strategy, for now, is going to be stalling until enemy Pokemon struggle themselves to death. Mudkip lacks the bulk needed to take a few dozen hits and would end up struggling before the opponent, so I need to get some reinforcements. I caught five Zigzagoon: Chocolate, Caramel, Taffy, Lolly, and Liquorice. Full party in hand, I marched to Route 102 and ran into Youngster Calvin, a six-year-old with a single level five Zigzagoon.

Calvin is the hardest trainer that I’ve ever beaten in any challenge run. Calvin is so insanely difficult that he made me question if the run is actually possible.

At level five, Calvin’s Zigzagoon knows three moves: Tackle, Tail Whip, and Growl. Combined, these two moves have 75 PP, meaning I need to stall for 105 turns before the Zigzagoon will struggle. Growl and Tail Whip are fine, but Tackle deals damage, and my team needs to shrug off 35 of them, plus however many struggles it will take for the Zigzagoon to knock itself out.

Even when my team has used Growl six times and Calvin has avoided all uses of Tail Whip, Calvin’s Zigzagoon can take a member of the Candy Squad out in five hits and GBSM out in six. Now, looking at those numbers, it seems that Zigzagoon should just barely be beatable. Unfortunately, it isn’t. Cal’s Zigzagoon is able to take out the first two of its brothers before they minimize its attack and tail Whip lowers the number of hits we can take. Plus, Struggle does just as much damage as Tackle but only does half as much in recoil, meaning that, if my math is right, it’ll take ten struggles for it to die, meaning that even in the absolute best circumstances, we’d need to survive 45 hits when we only have enough HP to take 36.

Now, there are a few random factors that make me think this battle may be technically possible at this point. Zigzagoon chooses its moves at random, meaning that it could in theory save all of its Tail Whips until after wasting its Tackles. And, as previously mentioned, Tackle can miss, which gives us a free hit to survive. But, at the same time, Zigzagoon can get criticals which effectively doom us. After two more tries, I decided that this battle wasn’t winnable, at least not yet.

So, we can’t beat a level five Zigzagoon. But, the question is, can we beat a level two Wurmple? Because if we can beat some wild Pokemon on Route 201, we can get some EXP and become strong enough to beat Youngster Calvin. Unfortunately, my team right now is just barely too weak to survive a single battle.

Fortunately, I bought a couple of potions. If I use a potion right before the Wurmple can take out Mudkip, I can just barely survive. Now, I only had a few potions, but I wasn’t too worried. After each battle, Zigzagoon has a 10% chance to give a random item after battle, including Super Potions, Rare Candies, and things like Nuggets and Full Restores that I can sell for money. With five Zigzagoon, I had a ~40% chance of getting an item after each battle I won.

But, luck wasn’t on my side. By the time Mudkip reached level eight, I was completely out of items. And Mudkip still wasn’t tough enough to survive a battle without a potion. Game over.

So I completely restarted. This time, I was smarter with my Pokeballs. Instead of throwing them willy nilly and having to buy ten more after running out, I saved and reset until I caught five Zigzagoon using the five balls Birch gave me. I also avoided Calvin until I was ready for him, because losing to him wasted money. The extra money this run gave me was enough to start my grind with ten potions instead of three. Also, I made sure that all of the Zigzagoon I caught were level three this time, hoping that the one extra HP would help. I made a save state and started grinding.

I also switched to hunting Poochyena instead of hunting Wurmple. They deal the same damage at level two and don’t know string shot, which made things go quicker. After my first Poochyena defeat, one of the Zigzagoon picked up a Full Restore, which I was able to sell for five extra potions.

Finally, after hours of grinding, Mudkip hit level ten and was able to survive a battle without a potion. I was ready. I marched up to Calvin and stalled. The battle came down to the wire, with Mudkip being the only team member standing when Calvin started struggling.

And then I ran out of Growls. I could not switch out, I could not attack. I was at full health from the last potion, so I could not use another. Calvin was struggling and I was without any means to beat him. Fortunately, one of the Zigzagoon picked up a Revive while I was grinding and I was able to use it to revive a Zigzagoon and switch to it. Still, I came dangerously close to losing.

After Calvin was defeated, I knew the run was possible. There were half a dozen trainers between me and Petalburg Woods, but fortunately, all of them could be avoided. Petalburg Woods contains two things that were useful for me: Cascoon and Silcoon, who only know Harden and can be trained on easily, and Shroomish, the first member of my actual team.

I caught the Shroomish with an Ultra Ball one of the Zigs picked up and named it Plus Ultra. Shroomish didn’t have any status moves yet, but it did have the ability Effect Spore, which could in theory be used to poison opponents. Effect Spore was too unreliable to rely on, though. I trained Shroomish up to level ten, where she learned Leech Seed. Finally, I had a consistent, controllable means to deal damage. Leech Seed drains one-eighth of the target’s health each turn, giving me a way to slowly whittle down opponents. It doesn’t work on grass types, and it’s slow, but it works well enough for now.

I stormed my way through the early game, beating Roxanne without issue. In Dewford Cave I got the TM for Flash and taught it to Shroomish. Flash is actually a decent stall move; the lowered accuracy does wonders to help Plus Ultra survive while waiting for Leech Seed to kill. I also grabbed the Everstone and gave it to Shroomish to keep her from evolving. Brawly was tough. His Pokemon hit hard, especially after a few Bulk Ups. I managed to get lucky and beat him on my second attempt. All of what I’ve said so far happened in a single six-hour play session, by the way. After beating Brawly, I saved the game and went to bed.

I booted up the game the next day and, for some odd reason I was back in Odale town. That’s weird. Also, I didn’t have any badges. And I didn’t have Shroomish. And all of my Pokemon were as weak as they were before the grind. That’s really weird.

I’m sure I saved after Brawly, but for some reason, it didn’t go through. I reverted to my last save before that. So, naturally, I did the only sane thing: redid everything until I got back to Brawly. It was...fun.

I went through Slateport without much issue; I ran out of Leech Seed PP against a Marill in the Seashore House and had to struggle it out, but that only took an eternity. North of Slateport I caught a new team member: Tex Mex the Gulpin. Gulpin had a decent bulk and comes with Poison Gas and Yawn, giving me a second way to take out opponents and a way to deal with Grass types.

I ran into a trainer with a Roselia on Route 110 and was reminded that Grass/Poison Pokemon are nightmares. Fortunately, I was able to walk around her. I mean, in theory, I could either take a Roselia out with a Zubat that knows Supersonic, by struggling it out, or getting it to kill itself by using Mega Drain on Gulpin because of her Liquid Ooze ability, but none of those plans are worth the effort.

May was, like before, annoying. I took out her Wailmer and Numel easily enough, but her Grovile took out Gulpin with Quick Attack. Fortunately, it poisoned itself thanks to Effect Spore. I made my way to Mauville, grabbed the Mach Bike, and made my way to the Day Care. I abused the Day Care to get both of my main team members up to Level 28. Gulpin evolved into Swalot and gained the new, fantastic moveset of Toxic/Poison Powder/Encore/Amnesia.

Leech Seed and Poison Powder both kill in eight turns. Toxic kills in five, making it our new method of taking things out. Also, I kept Poison Powder because it has a lot of PP making it a good move to waste time with.

I also evolved Mudkip, hoping the new Ground typing would help me beat Wattson. I ended up not needing it, because Shroomish and Swalot took him out with ease. I kept moving through the game until I reached a roadblock on Route 112. An unavoidable trainer with a Roselia. Fortunately, I had a plan.

In the Fiery Path, you can find wild Slugma. Slugma has the ability Flame Body, which has the ability to burn your opponent if they hit you with a contact move. The roadblock Roselia knows Poison Sting, which is a physical move. So I caught a Slugma and named it Sheers. Unfortunately, it has Magma Armor instead of Flame Body. So I caught a second one and named it Sheerz. It also had Magma Armor. The third Slugma, Shers, did have Flame Body. I took it to the Roselia, let it get pounded by Poison Sting, and...it fainted. Turns out Poison Sting doesn’t do contact.

So anyway I released the three Slugma and struggled out the Roselia. On Route 113 I caught a new team member: Punji the Skarmory. Skarmory is a famously bulky Pokemon, with great defensive stats, fantastic typing, and access to the interesting combination of Spikes and Whirlwind. Unfortunately, it doesn’t learn Spikes until level 42. And I caught it at level 16. So, he’s going to be wearing the EXP share and working as a tank for a while.

I stormed through the game until reaching Lavaridge. Lavaridge features cheap herbal medicine, which I used constantly throughout this run. Flannery’s fire Pokemon were a nightmare for Shroomish and Skarmory, but Swalot saved the day, using Amnesia to boost her Special Defence and tank Torkoal’s Overheat. After Flannery, I ran to the desert and grabbed the Sandstorm TM, which I taught to Skarmory to give him a way to deal damage. Sandstorm kills in sixteen turns, which isn’t great, but it does give us a way to take out Roselia. I also caught a Baltoy. I named it Tick because the first two I tried to catch Self Destructed. Baltoy doesn’t learn any status moves until 31, so I taught it Flash and kept it on the bench for a while.

Norman was tough. Poisoning his Pokemon allows them to decimate me with Facade, so I was forced to rely on Leech Seed for damage. Even then, he was able to use Focus Punch flinching, making the battle brutal. Fortunately, Truancy gave me time to heal my team and Norman eventually went down.

I ignored Wattson’s pleas for help and made my way to Fortree City. Along the way, I picked up an Absol I named Obama. His only good move at that point was Taunt, meaning that I had another near useless Pokemon to babysit. Wiona was tough, but Skarmory’s bulk and Swalot’s toxic helped me survive. I had my new Absol Taunt her Altaria to keep her from spamming Dragon Dance. Her Skarmory ended up being the most frustrating one to take out, because it kept killing Shroomish before I could get a Leech Seed off.

After Wiona, Baltoy learned Sandstorm and I taught it Reflect and Light Screen via TM, giving it a use. I caught a Duskull and named her M87. She started with Confuse Ray and Disable, making her a good Pokemon to shut down opponents while waiting for Toxic to kill them. Tate and Liza hit hard, but they only had two Pokemon, both of which Swalot was able to Toxic before going down. At the end of the battle, only Duskull and Baltoy were still standing, but the twins were down. I saved the game and ended another lengthy play session.

And I ended up back at Norman. It was at that point that I learned a fun quirk of my emulator. If you make a Save State, then play for a few hours, then make a battery save, it deletes the battery save and instead opens the save state next time. This also explains the weird issue with me ending up back at Odale Town.

This time, I didn’t have the patience to go through the game fighting trainers. Instead, I snuck past trainers until I caught Absol and Duskull again then abused the Daycare to get all of them up to level 42. This left the team without EVs, but I considered it a good sacrifice for not having to sit through dozens of slow battles.

After my Day Care abuse, I had a few new toys to play with. Duskull evolved into Dusclops, learning Will-O-Wisp and Curse along the way. Baltoy learned Cosmic Power and evolved into Claydol. Finally, Skarmory learned Spikes which, when combined with the Roar TM, gave him a reliable damage method. I also taught Obama Protect from a TM. I stomped the rematches against Wiona and the twins and made my way to the undersea cave.

The Undersea Cave was annoying, both because I had to leave Claydol and Absol behind for HM requirements and because the grunts kept using Taunt. Archie revived Kyogre and I went to Sootopolis to defeat it. Kyogre, the monstrous God of the sea, went down in four turns thanks to Dusclops’s Curse.

Wallace’s Milotic’s spamming of Recover was annoying, but I taunted it and stalled it out. With my eight gym badges, I was able to take on Victory Road. But I wasn’t ready, not quite. The late game battles had been getting harder and harder, so I decided to do a bit of prep work. I fought one hundred different Marill to give my team some HP EVs. I was going to do the same with Cascoon/Silcoon, but decided that I value my own time too much. I grabbed the Focus Band from Meteor Falls. I also made my way through the Ruined Ship because I remembered that the Leftovers were located in a trash can; they aren’t, they’re on the boat that you unlock by beating the Elite Four. Finally, I went back and fought some of the trainers I skipped so I could get money for healing items. My prep work done, I marched through Victory Road.

The trainers were tough, but beatable. I did have to keep leaving to heal my team at the Pokecenter, which was annoying. Waiting at the end of Victory Road was Wally. He sent out his Roselia, that devil, and I took it out with Dusclops’s Curse. I did some quick grinding before the Elite Four and Absol learned the move I caught it for: Perish Song. Perish Song essentially allows me to automatically win if I can get an opponent down to a single Pokemon. Going into the Elite Four, this was my team:

Plus Ultra (Shroomish)

Leech Seed/Flash/Stun Spore/Toxic

Tex Mex (Swalot)

Toxic/Amnesia/Protect/Attract

Punji (Skarmory)

Spikes/Sandstorm/Roar/Sand-Attack

Tick (Claydol)

Sandstorm/Cosmic Power/Reflect/Light Screen

M87 (Dusclops)

Will-O-Wisp/Confuse Ray/Disable/Curse

Obama (Absol)

Perish Song/Double Team/Taunt/Protect

I started out my battle with Sidney with some Spike/Roar comboing from Skarmory. After Skarmory went down, I switched to Swalot and took out a few Pokemon with Toxic. His last Pokemon, his Absol, went down to my Absol’s new Perish Song.

Phoebe’s team of Ghosts abused status moves, forcing me to keep switching out Pokemon. None of the team was knocked out, but the whole team had to step in to get rid of Phoebe.

Glacia was a challenge. Her super effective Ice Beams and Shadow Balls cut through my team. Worse, she managed to freeze Swalot twice. Her Walrein hit like a truck and would have taken out the entire team without Perish Song. At the end of the battle, all I had left was a red health Absol.

My plan for Drake was to have Swalot use Toxic then switch to Claydol. Unfortunately, I was out of Toxic when the battle started. Shroomish managed to take out Shieldon, but was one-shotted by Drake’s Flygon. I sent out Dusclops to use Will-O-Wisp, which missed three times in a row. Dusclops went down to a super effective Crunch, but I revived it and took out both Flygon and the Salamence with Curses and heal item spam. Altaria went down to a Perish Song, opening up the Champion battle, but I knew I was far from ready.

I used my Rare Candies I’d collected over the run, thanks to my Zigzagoon, to get a few last minute levels in. Shroomish finally learned Spore. I took off the Everstone and my boy finally evolved into Breloom. Would it have been easier to just forget about Spore and evolve at 23, as opposed to carrying around a near useless Shroomish for half the run? Yeah, probably. But whatever, I wanted the cool 100% sleep chance.

So, how did my fight with Steven go? Well, I recorded it and uploaded it here.

By the ingame timer, this run took 72 hours. But, I used superspeed. In reality, it only took 17 hours, mostly done during college lectures. I enjoyed this run, it was a fun challenge. I’ve already started on another run, this time in a much more difficult Pokemon game, so look forward to that. Thanks for reading.

[rhnuzlocke]

Chapter Five: No Spare Parts

Ren and Panahi battled a trainer and her Zigzagoon on a grassy knoll overlooking a little seaside village. The Zigzagoon charged, and Panahi hit it in the face with Water Gun. It teetered, dizzy, and collapsed.

“Nice shot, Panahi!”

“Why, thank you!”

The trainer recalled her pokemon. “Nice battle. That is some Wingull.”

“Thanks!” Panahi flew to Ren’s shoulder as the trainer waved and went on her way. “You see that? She said you were a good battler.”

Panahi shuffled her wings primly. “I never said I wasn’t.”

Ren did not get to tease her any further as they were interrupted by a loud chirp from the lone tree sitting atop the hill. There was a Common Taillow with a bright splash of red across its face and breast sitting on one of the branches. It called out to Panahi and Ren again, gesturing with its wings.

“She saw us win that match and she wants to battle,” Panahi translated, then narrowed her eyes and clacked her beak irritably. “She also says she’ll join your team if we can beat her.”

And why did you accept her challenge?  

“I figured she must have wanted a trainer really badly. And I thought I could at least give her enough practice to help her impress someone. You know, because I’m a fool.”

“Well, how about it, Ahi?”

“Sure thing, Honey. I think I can take a Taillow, even a cocky one.”

“Alright, open with a Water Gun. Soak her wings!”

Panahi took to the air, and the Taillow followed a second later. Panahi shot off a stream of water as the Taillow arrowed towards her. But before it landed, the Taillow opened her mouth wide, and huge wave of concussive sound burst forth. The Water Gun fell apart, and the sound wave collided with Panahi like a wall. She reeled backward through the air before her wings crumpled and she plummeted. Ren ran forward and caught her.

“Houou no niji! Are you okay, Ahi?”

Panahi groaned and Ren withdrew her. The Taillow landed back on her perch and waited, eyes glinting in anticipation.

“Akahana, are you up for this?” The Poochyena nodded grimly and stalked forward, legs stiff and hackles bristling. “You won’t be able to take more than one hit from her, so you have to make yours count. Wait for her to dive and use Thunder Fang.”

The Taillow swooped down, and Akahana leapt to the side as the Taillow released another Boomburst. Akahana was knocked sideways—a glancing blow—but she rolled and sprung back to her paws in one fluid motion. The Taillow flapped a few times in surprised before banking sharply to come in for another pass, diving lower this time. Akahana coiled, sparks leaking from her jaws. The Taillow waited until she was very close before opening its mouth to fire.

“NOW!” Ren cried.

Akahana sprang into the air, and the sound wave ruffled her fur as it passed beneath her. She rolled forward, catching the Taillow’s tail in her teeth, and there was a bright flash as she discharged. The Taillow jerked violently backward, and its back hit the ground hard just before Akahana landed on top of it, forepaws pinning its wings. The Taillow convulsed beneath her, and electricity fizzled through its feathers.

Ren ran forward and dropped to her knees as she reached into her bag, and Akahana jumped off the prone Taillow. “You better not be dead,” Ren muttered as she sprayed it carefully with a potion.

Akahana sat back on her haunches and sighed, fur laying flat again. A moment later, the Taillow opened its eyes.

“Thank Arceus.” Ren sighed, and her head lolled into her hand for several seconds before she came back to herself and sprayed the Taillow again, this time with a paralyze heal.

The Taillow’s breathing evened out, and Ren rounded on Akahana. “Chikuso! What the hell was that! Were you trying to kill them?”

“No,” Akahana responded, cocking her head. “She could have hurt me just as badly with a move like that.”

“She’s a wild, you’re not. She hasn’t learned control.”

“Training or no, battling is dangerous. You must know that?”

Before Ren could answer, the Taillow popped up. It hopped over to Akahana and chirped cheerfully with a dip of her head.

Akahana dipped her head back. “Thank you.”

That gave Ren pause. “She’s not mad?”

“She understands.”

Ren started to say something back, but it caught in her throat. Her eyebrows furrowed as she tried to sort it out. In the end, she closed her mouth and rubbed her left hand over the long thin scar on her right forearm. The pokemon continued their conversation without her as she wrestled with herself.

“Ren.”

Ren startled back to the present, and it was jarring. For a moment she couldn’t remember what was happening.

Akahana continued. “She would like to be on your team. She says most of the trainers that came through here couldn’t beat her. She was very impressed.”

“Are you sure she—”

“Please.” Once again that stopped Ren dead. “She’s strong. I know we have a flying-type already, but she really wants to train with us.”

Ren willed herself to focus and locked eyes with Akahana. She looked… pleading. It took Ren a moment to sort that, but then it was obvious. Akahana did feel badly about hurting the Taillow. It was an accident, and Ren had yelled at her for it.

So, we aren’t going to talk about that now?  

“You already know what happened.”

That’s hardly the point.  

“Just give me a bit more time. It will come up plenty.”

As you wish.  

“I didn’t mean it like that. I’d be honored to have her.” Ren pulled out a pokeball and offered it. The Taillow looked back at Akahana for confirmation before hopping forward excitedly and pecking the button. Ren looked down at the ball for a moment before stowing it.

“I’m sorry, Aka. You’re right, and I shouldn’t have yelled at you.” She clutched her arm again and rode through the surge in her stomach. “I just—I have a hard time—” Her hand was changing color  from lack of circulation, but it still wasn’t enough. “Nevermind,” she sighed and let go. “That was one hell of a battle.”

Ren offers her hand to Akahana, with a cautious smile. Akahana hesitated for a moment, looking at Ren’s face with her piercing red eyes. Then she closed them and pressed her head into Ren’s hand.

...

Ren trudged through dark, dense woods with Panahi resting on one shoulder and Iki curled in her arms. Everything was covered with moss, vines, and lichen save for the ferns and mushrooms that sprouted up between roots and rotting logs. Leaf litter crunched beneath her boots, and the canopy tapered above them. She had been in forests before, even old ones, but none like this.

Akahana trotted ahead this time, raising her head periodically to scent the air. Tāraki leapt through the branches ahead of them, attempting to lead, but his path wandered. Māia the Taillow tittered at him, then swooped in a new direction, calling for the others to follow. Ren caught up while they argued. She slumped, letting out a sigh.

“I don’t even mind that we’re lost. I just need a break.”

“I hate how closed it is in here,” said Panahi. “I can’t see the sky at all. May I go in my ball for a while?”

“Absolutely,” said Ren with relief and straightened as the Wingull’s weight left her shoulder.

“It is kind of scary in here,” Iki admitted. “Can I go too?”

“Sure,” Ren sighed and withdrew her as well. “Who wants to tell her she’ll be doing a lot of training in this forest?”

“I think we’re starting to attract attention,” Akahana growled.

Ren looked around more carefully and began to notice that they were surrounded by unusually large mushrooms. Then she saw one move and could hear it quietly snickering. She pulled out her dex, which informed her that they were all Shroomish of about half a dozen different variants.

“Maa… Kai would love this.”

Akahana grumbled, and Ren opened her mouth to inform the bickering pair of their current situation, when one of the Shroomish made itself known by stepping forward into the clearing. Its dome was porcelain white with just a little brown at the top, and its squat legs were a dark sepia. It tittered at them, setting off what sounded a lot like laughter from the rest.

“We are not lost!” Tāraki insisted, and Māia’s tweet seemed of a similar sentiment.

“Do you know where a pond with dark water is?” Akahana cut across them. She rolled her eyes at whatever the Shroomish said back but followed when it began to march off slightly to the right of where they were headed. “She’ll take us.”

“You’re the best, Aka.”

Akahana acknowledged that with a flick of her ears, and the other Shroomish parted to let them pass. Tāraki and Māia shrugged at each other and followed.

It turned out they had been fairly close to Tea Pond but probably wouldn’t have found it themselves. Ren stripped down to her sports bra and spandex shorts and took a swim. Panahi paddled around placidly, and Iki skittered nervously across the surface, never straying far from Ren. Tāraki crouched on a rock near the shore and amused himself by plunging his hand in and watching it disappear into the dark water. Māia swept back and forth overhead, practicing her aerial acrobatics, and Akahana and the Shroomish watched from the bank.

Ren dried off on shore with Iki crouching beneath her tented knees. Once she’d had something to eat, she set about assigning exercises to her team.

“Panahi, I want you to practice your Water Gun accuracy on a moving target. Tāraki, you’re the target, and I want you to dodge as best as you can. Try out whatever you feel and see what works.”

“Awesome!” Tāraki crowed, already bouncing. “Come on, Panahi!”

“Alright, Fiddlehead,” Panahi sighed, stretching out her long wings.

“Iki, I want you to practice landing Fell Stinger on Akahana.” The Surskit glanced nervously at Akahana but nodded. “And Akahana I want you to lean on that Quick Feet ability to keep away without running.” Akahana nodded curtly and paced off a little way to get clear of Panahi’s spray. “Māia, you and I are gonna do some drills to get that Quick Attack up to par.”

The Taillow whistled back and leapt off her branch to begin.

Iki peered up at Māia as she swooped, banked, and dove, barely able to follow her movements. She shuffled a little farther away.

“Are you ready?” Akahana prompted, and Iki startled.

“Actually, I was wondering if—if I could ask you for some advice? Before we start?”

Akahana sat down. “Sure. What about?”

“Um, well, any general advice you might have about battling. You always seem like you know what you’re doing, and I… I have no idea.”

Akahana, doesn’t answer immediately, taking time to consider her response. “You need to look out for yourself. Don’t let her put you in danger.”

Iki’s eyes went wide with surprise, and she glanced worriedly at Ren. “She wouldn’t do that, would she?”

“I don’t know. That’s the point.” Iki drooped, and Akahana sighed. “Look, the way I figure it, any trainer that puts up with that mon,” she jerked her head at Tāraki, who was taking a Water Gun directly to the face because he’d a fancy backflip instead of ducking sensibly, “can’t be that bad, or that picky. That’s why I agreed to be on her team. But this battling business is a competition for them. They play for themselves with our lives. She’s good at this, so if we stick with her, we’ll get stronger. But the more powerful we become, the greater the competition. Some day, one of us might not be strong enough, might not compliment the roster enough, might become expendable. I can hope she stays grounded, gets attached to us, takes care of us. But it’s not wise to rely on it. Humans can be fickle and cruel.”

Iki turns turned away and watched Ren and her teammates for a minute. “…You’re right, and if anybody’s going to be expendable, it’s me. I’m just a bug. Battling scares me, but I have nothing to go back to. This is my best shot at a real life, a life that means something…”

Akahana sighed deeply. “Same here, bug.”

“Did that really happen? I guess I’m not that surprised but—wait, how did you see that? I know you've been in my head, but I didn’t know that was how they became friends.”

They are connected to you, and so I am bonded with them as well.  

“Even though Iki…”

It does not matter. You are still bonded.  

“Naruhodo… Why did you show me this?”

I wanted you to understand whose belief you won, how hard it was, and how much you have done for all of them.  

“Well, I always knew Akahana had reservations, and her loyalty always felt like an honor. But I suppose it is different to see it.”

Exactly.  

“Right. Now, on to my original reason for looking back at this particular training session…”

“Take a breather, Māia! You did great!” Ren called.

“I’m tapping out for a bit,” Panahi huffed behind them. “I don’t have a single Water Gun left in me.”

Tāraki whined and slunk back over when Ren called him. “I have another exercise if you still have still have so much energy.”

“Ooh! What is it?”

“Absorb practice. You’ll be learning Mega Drain soon and we really need to get your focus up.”

“But I hate Absorb,” Tāraki grumbled as he turned to start.

Ren turned to find Panahi and the Shroomish engaged in conversation. Panahi nodded along as she listened, and it didn’t take long for Ren’s curiosity to get the better of her.

“What is she saying?”

“She’s interested in the training exercises,” Panahi explained. “She’s never seen it before. She thought you had to battle other pokemon to get stronger.”

“Well, you still do have to battle other pokemon. It’s the only way to gain power. But the exercises build up your potential and make you stronger over the long haul. And of course, practicing strategies, movements, and execution makes winning battles a lot easier and safer, so it speeds your rate of growth too.”

Panahi and the Shroomish stared at her.

“I’m sorry. That was probably a bit much.”

“Not at all, Honey. It’s always a comfort to hear how well you know this business. Makes me proud to have signed on with you.” Ren felt herself turning red, and Panahi smiled. “Let me just make sure our wild friend here understood all of that.”

Ren was grateful for the opportunity to recompose herself while the Shroomish listened intently to Panahi’s translation.

“She loved it,” Panahi reported. She wants to stay and watch us a bit more if that’s alright. She says she’ll show us some other features of the forest in exchange.”

Ren smiled. “That sounds great.”

...

Ren trudged contentedly through the forest, following the Shroomish, and Tāraki popped his head out of a nearby tree.

“Is there any way she could move a little faster?” he whined. “I know she has short legs, but I swear she’s slow on purpose.”

“Whine all you want, but I’m glad she found us.”

“I guess Tea Pond was pretty cool,” Tāraki grumbled, face scrunched like there was a sour taste in his mouth “and the berry grove—”

“And let’s not forget how much you loved that moss rock.”

“Well—”

“And that fern glen was pretty sweet.”

“Yes, yes. It was all pretty cool, I’ll admit that. I just think it’s time to get back to the main path.”

“Why so goal oriented all of a sudden?” Ren teased.

The Shroomish chirped, and Tāraki’s face contorted in indignant rage. “That’s why!”

“Got some mouth on her, huh?”

“Yes,” Tāraki hissed through his teeth.

“Well, if it’s any comfort, this should be the last stop on the tour. We are pretty close to Route 104. Then it will be back to the battle grindstone for you. I want to make sure you’re well prepped for the gym. Not to mention we could use at least a little money for food and—”

The Shroomish stopped, listening. Tāraki dropped out of the tree onto Ren’s shoulder. She looked around and saw wild pokemon moving around them, in the opposite direction they were currently headed. The Shroomish purred lowly.

“What’s up?”

“Something strange. Maybe a human in trouble?”

“Let’s find out.”

Ren took the lead, and the Shroomish fell in behind her. As they got nearer, Ren could hear raised voices. She slowed as they approached, placing her boots carefully, so as not to make too much noise. The scene that emerged was an oddly familiar one. There was a middle-aged man on the ground, backed up against a tree trunk with a Poochyena snarling in his face. Only this time it was brown rather than gray and clearly belonged to the tall, rough teenager looming over the scene. He had short, messy hair and was swimming in a red hoodie and charcoal pants two sizes too big for him.

“And that’s when everything started, though it took awhile for me to figure that out.”

“HEY!” Ren yelled before she could think better of it or even really process everything in front of her. “What the hell is going on here?”

The attention of all three snapped to her immediately, and she felt Tāraki’s tail waggle agitatedly behind her head. That drew the eyes of the man on the ground.

“You’re a trainer, right? Please help me! He’s trying to steal my equipment!”

“Stay out of this, kid,” the teen warned her. “You don’t know what this is about.”

Ren’s brow set. “I think I know enough.”

“I don’t want to hurt anybody.”

“It did occur to me that he might actually mean that. It sounded like he did. But all the evidence pointed the other way, and I couldn’t risk it. To even threaten to use your pokemon on another person… Desperation can be just as dangerous as malice. I didn’t know what he was capable of, only what I was.”

“Tāraki, Quick Attack!”

Tāraki jumped off her shoulder in a blur of speed and body-checked the Poochyena off the man before any of them could react. The man scrambled backward, and Tāraki and Ren planted themselves between him and the other two.

The teen’s fists balled at his sides. “You’re making a b-b-b-b—a mistake!” he stammered.

“So are you,” Ren shot back. She could see his jaw muscles grow taught before he barked out a command.

“Bite!”

“Absorb!”

Tāraki’s Absorb hit before the Poochyena could reach him, but it kept coming and sunk its teeth into his tail. Tāraki twisted away, face hard and muscles coiled.

“Keep your distance, Tāraki, and keep using Absorb.”

“If that’s how you want to battle—Fang, use Howl, then Bite!”

The Poochyena raised its head and howled, glowing softly as power surged around it. Tāraki charged up another Absorb and launched it as the Poochyena ran at him. Its jaws snapped shut just short of him as he somersaulted out of the way. The Poochyena shuddered as Absorb sapped its energy but it stayed on its feet.

Tāraki couldn’t take another Bite with the Howl boost, so Ren helped him dodge and slowly sap his strength back. Tāraki dove under the Poochyena in a moment of particular daring, but it paid off. The Poochyena tripped and landed hard. Tāraki slapped its flank with his tail as it got back to its paws, and it wobbled. As close as this was, they nearly had it.

“Come on, Fang!” the guy growled. “Get—” but then he stopped because a golden powder was drifting down from the branches above him and his pokemon. Ren followed his gaze and saw the Shroomish using Stun Spore.

“Shit!” he swore and recalled his Poochyena, who was twitching as the paralysis took hold. He began to stumble away, clearly feeling the effects of the spores himself, and paused to brace himself against a tree for a moment. “Th-this isn’t over!” he yelled before starting off again.

Ren made no attempt to follow. “He’s got some nerve calling me kid.” she muttered. “That gangly asshole can’t possibly be over seventeen.” When he was well out of sight, she turned back to the older man, who was standing and brushing himself off. “Are you okay?”

“Yes, thank you, miss.” he said calmly. She had expected him to be in shock after being threatened with a pokemon. “That was very clever with your Shroomish.”

“Oh, no. She’s wild. That was all her,” Ren shrank back from the… compliment? He probably didn’t realize the implication. Maybe he was in shock.

“Well, thank you anyway. You and your Treecko were very brave.”

“No problem.” She offered him a reassuring smile. “But if you don’t mind me asking, what exactly was that all about?”

“I don’t really know myself,” he answered, picking a silver briefcase off the ground. She eyed him carefully, and he shrugged. “Must have thought I had something valuable.”

“I should go report this, but please take my card. I work for Devon. If you ever need a favor, don’t hesitate to ask.”

Ren took the card, and it did look quite normal and legitimate. His name was Dr. Graeme Aarden, and he was the head of the fossil revival department.

You have superb instincts, or at least a very keen mind under pressure.  

“Of course, I looked him up later and found out he was not only a real scientist but a leading expert in his field, which made me feel very silly about being so suspicious.”

But you were right, in a way.  

“I guess I was.”

“Let me at least escort you to the road.” Ren said as he was about to leave. “I was headed that way anyway.”

“Oh, thank you, you are too kind.”

He started walking, and she was about to follow but paused. “Tāraki, I know we had that battle, you did great, but thank the Shroomish for me please. That was super smart of her, and she didn’t have to do that for us.”

Tāraki nodded and passed the message on while they all headed for Route 104.

...

Iki lunged at a trainer’s Seedot, thorn glowing lime green, and managed to catch it just beneath its cap. It keeled over, and the other trainer recalled it.

“Wow. I haven’t lost like that in a while.”

“Hear that, Iki? Nice job!” Iki smiled tentatively. “Oh, and nice battle by the way,” Ren told the trainer and held out her hand. “It was smart to use bide like that.”

“Thanks,” she responded and took the offered hand.

They exchanged a few more pleasantries, which Ren’s team waited patiently through, before parting ways with a friendly wave.

There was more light ahead of them on the trail, meaning they were finally close to the edge of the forest.

“I guess it’s time to get to Rustboro.” She turned to look at her team, and her eyes fell on the Shroomish. “I guess this is goodbye, then. Thank you for all of your help.

The Shroomish looked around and then up at Ren, gurgling seriously.

“Actually, she’d rather come with us, if that’s alright,” said Panahi

Ren smiled down at her. “Sure. I’d be honored.”

Tāraki looked a tad annoyed at that, and Akahana blinked in surprise. Ren crouched down and pulled out a pokeball.

“Sorry I don’t have a name for you yet. I’ll try and think of one before I register you at the next center.”

The Shroomish was not the least bit bothered and hit the button. Ren stood and looked fondly at the pokeball.

“So, Tāraki, this isn’t going to be a problem for you, is it?”

“Of course not,” he said, crossing his arms. “If you think she should be on the team, then it’s fine with me. I don’t know if we’ll be best friends, but I’ll try to get along.”

“Thanks, Shima.”

[themurphyzone]

Absolutely Disastrous Ch 8

Ch 8: Lost in the Woods! Another Costumed Weirdo?

“I think we’re lost.”

“We’re not lost. We’ve taken a slight detour from the recommended path.”

“So we’re lost.”

“Think of it as the scenic route,” Milo suggested, looking at his map again. Before he could show Melissa and Zack their current location in the Petalburg Woods, a Linoone snatched the paper out of his hands and disappeared into a clump of berry bushes.

Unfazed, Milo brought out a second map. “Okay, so we’re near a bunch of Oran trees right now, so if we head north we should see some birches and hang the second right.”

Zack groaned, resting his back against a mossy rock. “Too bad everything looks the same.”

“I also have a topography map, a latitude map, and a map of Silph Co’s ventilation and teleporter system,” Milo said. “Never really understood their teleporter thing. Seems kinda bad for employee morale.”

They’d been wandering around Petalburg Woods all morning, and so far they’d had little luck making sense of their surroundings. Every tree looked the same, packed together so densely that it was almost impossible to tell where one tree ended and another began. He’d heard ghost stories of a forest in Sinnoh. According to the tales, it was always nighttime because the sun’s rays never reached the ground, making it a prime spot for ghosts to lure unsuspecting travelers to their dilapidated manor.

Dr. Magnezone fans loved using Sinnoh’s folklore and ghost stories as inspiration. Milo once saw Sara cry over a fanfic where Dr. Magnezone had to search for a Lunar Wing to relieve Time Infernape of a Darkrai-inflicted nightmare before the stress killed him.

“Hey, let’s break for a bit,” Melissa said. She laid down on a large protruding root. “I can’t wait to get out of forest territory.”

Milo found a cozy spot next to a fallen log, and Zack reclined against a tree trunk.

“Zack, there’s gotta be some spooky tales in Johto,” Milo said. “You should tell us one!”

“Yeah, spill!” Melissa prodded Zack in the arm.

Zack winced and rubbed his arm. “Do you cut your nails into claws or something?”

Melissa shrugged. “I jab hard, Underwood. You gonna tell us a ghost story or what?”

“Neither of you are gonna let up until I tell you one, huh?” Zack sighed.

“Nope!” Milo and Melissa chorused. Diogee looked up from his water bowl, red eyes boring expectantly into Zack.

“Fine,” Zack said. “This one isn’t for the faint of heart, so be warned.”

Milo and Melissa leaned forward in anticipation.

“Two millennia ago, a beautiful maiden fell in love with a soldier. One day, the soldier had to go fight in a distant land. As the maiden watched him disappear over the horizon, she swore she would never fall in love with anyone else, and that she would always look towards the ocean in anticipation of his return.”

Milo’s eyes started to water. Melissa gripped her skirt tightly.

“The years passed, but she still waited. Every suitor was turned down, all attempts to coax her away from the cliff failed. Eventually, a deity took pity on her. She agreed to be transformed into a statue atop the cliff so she could continue watching the horizon. The deity also appointed a messenger Pokémon to maintain the house and keep the maiden’s soul company while she kept her eternal vigil. To this day, she continues to wait and pray.”

Milo wiped away a stray tear, and Diogee had to carefully nudge him a few feet so a tree didn’t crash on top of him.

“That was…sad,” Melissa admitted. “How ‘bout something in the horror department to even it out?”

“Gimme a minute,” Milo said, burying his face into Diogee’s fur to calm himself down. “I got one.”

He took a deep breath, holding a flashlight under his chin for added dramatic effect. Zack drew a sharp breath.

“Once there was a little girl who lived in a cottage. Her mommy and daddy scrounged and begged and pleaded for scraps of food, for they were poorer than dirt,” Milo began, keeping his voice so low that Melissa and Zack had to strain to hear him.

He paced as he continued the story, feeling three sets of innocent eyes processing every word and movement. Milo smirked and continued. “One day, the little girl was left alone in the house. As she did her daily chores like any good child would do, she looked out the window. A doll laid in the dirt, its seams torn and one of its button eyes missing. It was ugly and nobody would’ve spared a second glance. But the little girl took pity on the doll and fixed it up with the only bolt of spare fabric her family had.”

“Oh no,” Zack whispered. Melissa elbowed him.

“When the last seam was closed, the doll offered to grant three wishes for the little girl. First, she wished that her family would never go hungry again. That night, her parents came home to find a feast fit for a royal banquet waiting for them. The little girl showed them the doll and explained what she’d done, and her parents were too grateful to question her any further. But trouble arose when the mother didn’t have material to make new clothes with, so the little girl asked the doll for endless wealth so her mother could purchase the finest and rarest silks and wool. The doll granted the second wish, and the family lived happily for many years.”

“The little girl grew into a beautiful woman, and she attracted the attention of a prince. They courted for a while, and the woman showed him the doll who’d saved her family from poverty. Disgusted by its horrible appearance, the prince broke off their engagement and rode away into the night. Because she still loved him, the woman asked the doll to grant her final wish: have the prince fall back in love with her. Once it was granted, the woman laid the doll on her childhood bed and went back to the castle. She planned to never return to the cottage and sever all ties with her poverty-filled life to make sure the prince stayed in love with her.”

Milo paused. The tension was thick enough to cut with a butter knife.

“The woman married the prince and forgot all about the doll. But the doll never forgot her. It granted all her wishes without complaint. It kept her company for ten years. And now it laid in a dark room, never to see the sun again. Anger consumed its mind. Oh, how it thirsted for vengeance. It flew to the castle on an otherworldly energy, and there it spotted the woman, brushing her hair…alone.”

He could see the whites of Zack’s eyes, and Milo crept closer, curling his hands into claws and looming as best he could.

“It crept closer…closer…closer…” Milo punctuated each word with a silent step until he hovered over Zack. Zack pressed himself against the tree with a strangled yelp.

“-and then it POUNCED!”

“AIYEEEH!”

Milo pulled Zack to his feet, laughing so hard he couldn’t breathe. “Oh man!” Milo doubled over. “That was, ha! Got you real good!”

Zack just stared at him. “I didn’t scream.”

“Wasn’t me either,” Melissa said. “Believe me, you would know if Zack screamed cause he sounds like a plucked Swellow. Whoever screamed a few minutes ago has more of a tone-deaf Loudred combined with a sick Swablu frequency.”

“I don’t sound like a plucked Swellow,” Zack mumbled.

“NO! DON’T TAKE MY PAPERS!”

Everyone jumped to their feet as a terrified businessman rushed past their resting spot and tripped over a large root. His briefcase spilled open, papers fluttering all around him. He dazedly shoved them back into the briefcase, muttering several curses to himself.

“Hand over those papers, old man!” another voice snarled.

The other man was dressed in a lava-red uniform, a stylized ‘M’ emblazoned across his chest. His hood had two strange horns on top. Milo stared at him, wondering why someone would choose to wear a thick red onesie in Hoenn’s tropical climate.

Diogee growled menacingly, only backing off when Milo gestured for him to stand down until they figured out what happened.

“What’s going on here?” Melissa asked.

“He’s trying to rob me!” the businessman shouted. “I swear, all I did was stop to take pictures of a Shroomish-I’ve always liked that Pokémon, you see-and Hoodie there jumped me and tried to steal my documents!”

“How many times have I told you to quit calling me Hoodie? It’s Ignacio! I-G-N-A-C-I-O!”

His protests went ignored as the group collected all the stray papers and put them back into the suitcase.

“Thank you, children,” the businessman gasped breathlessly. “I’m just gonna be going now and-“

Ignacio scowled. “You aren’t going anywhere! Hand over those papers or face the wrath of Team Magma!”

He posed dramatically, which would’ve looked a lot more threatening if he’d chosen a target without knowledge of meme culture.

Ignacio released a Zigzagoon and Koffing. “You’ve trampled on Team Magma’s dreams, and that’s unforgivable! For I am the Magma Grunt Ignacio who stands for humanity’s brighter tomorrow! In the name of Groudon, I shall incinerate you!”

“Aren’t you supposed to be saying love and justice or something?” Melissa asked.

“I wanted to, but it was copyrighted,” Ignacio admitted. “Seriously, I’m not a monster. I respect copyright law.”

“Whatever. I’ll sit this one out, boys,” Melissa said, dragging the businessman out of the way. “While you kick his butt, I’ll be organizing my photos.”

“I don’t remember you taking photos,” Zack said.

Melissa smirked. “I work in mysterious ways.”

“Enough babbling!” Ignacio sneered. “You fools will know the wrath of the 27th ranked Magma goon!”

“That’s supposed to be a bragging point?” Zack scoffed as he sent out Treecko.

Treecko chewed on his stick placidly as he sized up his opponents. Diogee moved into position, eyes fixated on Koffing.

Living near Mt. Chimney had long acquainted Milo and Diogee with the local Pokémon and their habits. Machop liked to test their strength by weightlifting Geodude, and one should never disturb their contests unless they wanted 44.1 pounds of living rock hurtled at them. Numel preferred sand baths, and Torkoal could only distinguish between light and dark.

On the Murphy Ranch, they sometimes had to announce the Purple Protocol in the event of a Koffing wandering onto the property. Its smoke and poisonous gas was harmful to the developing lungs of young humans and Absol, so all minors were to stay inside until the adults had gotten rid of the smoke and contained the Koffing until it could be relocated.

And it had the only type advantage on the current battlefield.

This was gonna be interesting.

“Create a Smokescreen cover!” Ignacio ordered. “Zigzagoon, Quick Attack on Treecko!”

Black gas spewed out of Koffing’s pores, obscuring it from view. Treecko braced himself, eyes trained on the smoke.

There was a slight rustle in the bushes behind Treecko, and a blurred shape shot out.

“Look out!” Zack yelled.

Zigzagoon knocked Treecko off-balance, though Treecko managed to dislodge it with a Pound. Soon the two were engaged in a high-speed Quick Attack fight.

Meanwhile, Milo and Diogee were trying to locate Koffing inside all the black haze with no luck.

Ignacio smirked. “Use Sludge!”

“Diogee, watch out!” Milo warned, but it was too late. Diogee’s eyes were covered in an inky material. Rearing back on his hind legs, Diogee unleashed several Cut attacks in random directions. One of them hit Koffing in the middle of its skull pattern, and another clipped Treecko’s tail. Zigzagoon emerged unscathed, though it panted heavily from exertion.  

A pile of splintered wood and apples crashed to the ground. There were some indignant squawks from bird Pokémon above, but none of them came down to disrupt the battle.

Zack snapped his fingers. “Use Mega Drain on Zigzagoon and get your strength back,” he said.

Zigzagoon was too dazed to follow Ignacio’s instructions to dodge, and a bright green glow lit up its body. The energy flowed into Treecko’s fingertips, rejuvenating him instantly.

“Great! Now grab those apples and stuff ‘em into Koffing’s pores!” Zack exclaimed.

Upon hearing his command, Melissa stuffed her unfinished scrapbook into her bag and hauled the businessman to his feet. “Zack, you do realize-“

Zack had a gleam in his eye.

“Uh, Melissa, I think your battle style’s rubbing off on him,” Milo said awkwardly.

Treecko grabbed a handful of apples and weaved around Koffing, easily outmaneuvering the Poison-type. Within minutes, Koffing’s pores were plugged, Treecko dusting his hands triumphantly.

“C’mon, blow those apples out!” Ignacio screeched.

Koffing groaned, eyes squeezed shut as it tried to blow the apples out. But Treecko had jammed them tightly, and only minuscule amounts of gas leaked into the air. With one last inhale, a glowing Koffing dropped into Treecko’s arms.

Treecko blinked for a moment, then tossed Koffing at Zack and hid behind Melissa, who backed away slowly.

“ACK!” Zack screamed and tossed the Poison-type at Milo.

“It’s using Self-Destruct!” Milo yelped, striking Koffing with a two-handed serve that would’ve made a professional volleyball player proud.

The Koffing landed in the businessman’s arms. The man paled immediately. “GlorytoArceusinthehighest,” he muttered a prayer rapidly in some ancient language Milo wasn’t even sure existed in their dimension.

“Quit being a baby!” Melissa snapped, yanking Koffing out of his arms and hurling it at Ignacio’s face.

But since Melissa was Melissa, she only managed to toss it one foot.

Koffing unceremoniously fell to the ground, its glow almost blinding.

“Diogee, follow my voice!” Milo yelled, grabbing Diogee’s horn once he was close enough and guiding him out of the blast radius.

“COWARDS!” Ignacio shook his fist as everyone fled the immediate vicinity. “WE IN TEAM MAGMA ALWAYS STAND OUR GROUND! FOR WE ARE PILLARS OF HUMANITY, UNYIELDING IN RESOLVE AND PUTTING OUR FOOT DOWN ON ALL MATTERS AND CRUSHING THOSE WHO OPPOSE US!”

“We should put him and Patchy in a room together,” Melissa remarked. “Who needs primetime television when you’ve got them?”

“You might want to reconsider your foot position,” Milo called to Ignacio.

Ignacio glanced down, his eyes widening to comical proportions.

“Well, crud.”

Koffing exploded in a glorious blaze of white light.

“Don’t worry,” Melissa told the trembling businessman, who seemed convinced that he would be arrested for environmental disturbances and manslaughter. “It’s just his pride that didn’t survive.”

AN: Ghost of Maiden’s Peak took place in Kanto, not Johto, but they share the same landmass so what the hey.

Using Koffing as a beach ball is ill-advised.

And now Team Magma is on the scene! Things are picking up!

[idoloatria-archive]

Verse update!

⦗ ❝ sʜᴇɴᴀɴɪɢᴀɴꜱ sʜɪᴘᴘɪɴɢ ᴀɴᴅ sᴜʙᴘʟᴏᴛs! ᴏʜ ᴍʏ! ❞ ⋮ ship verse 01 ⦘ aka Lisia x Touya

I’m tryna keep up to date with everything, this is mostly for my own benefit pfft.

Long af ‘Summary’-

When we last left our heroes, they-

Lisia, still dealing with the shock of the Head Judge causing all the trouble at the Hyper Rank Contest, decided to have another incognito outing. She was at a strip mall, guarded by Professionals that stayed hidden to begin with. And...she was getting all mushy thinking about Touya and then Touya himself made a convenient appearance!

He was leaving a store dedicated to a cryptid known as ‘Largepaw’ with a bunch of stuff. Anyway, stuff happened (involving some cosplayers) and he saw Lisia, but since she wasn’t dressed as her Idol self, he only knew her as that girl that he’d shared the Pokemon Center room with.

She was interested in the whole Largepaw thing, and Touya almost dragged her into the shop so she could learn more, but in the end they went to a cafe. They even ordered some food, how domestic. Anyway. Lisia’s Vaporeon trashed Touya’s Largepaw stuff and made a huge mess of everything, and during the whole distraction, Lisia’s bag was stolen by a Zigzagoon. Oops.

She chased after it and ran right heckin into the nearby woods. One of the Professional guards ran after her. Touya ran after the guard. And the other five guards ran after Touya. Lisia ended up falling into a ditch full of creepy Zigzagoon that tried to eat her due to the cafe food that had ended up on her (and now she’s Very Uneasy about Zigzagoon). She thought she was gonna die but then Touya swooped in and saved her.

They ran off, but the guards were then fooled into thinking Lisia had been killed by the group of Zigzagoon. Lisia and Touya kept going through the woods and ended up going into a cave to actually have ten minutes of development (not as suggestive as it sounds, I swear, although it did involve them being half naked and touching each other hmm).

The guards realised Lisia was not dead, and they began to search for her while Touya patched up all the bites and scratches she’d gotten (from the Zigzagoon!). The shippy moment was rudely interrupted by one of the Professionals appearing at the cave entrance. Aaaaannd then he was snatched away by a mysterious creature! Lisia and Touya were all wtf!! and they took some photos of the cave paintings, and there was a magical moment where Lisia put her contact details into his phone.

Anyway, the rest of the thread was a Wild ride of all the other guards finding them and getting snatched away. Lisia was convinced Largepaw had killed them all and that it was all her fault. The stress of it all made her pass out and so it was up to Touya to get her and the guards out of there. Which he did. Somehow. And she managed to text Touya briefly once she woke up in the room he’d gotten her to.

Yikes this is long already but theres still a whole other thread to talk about!

Master Rank! Lisia wasn’t going to be helping or judging Touya aka Braveman for this round, she was going to be competing against him. Yikes. But it was all going pretty well...right up until his Braveman suit ripped and fangirls got excited and, idek, Lisia ended up catching on fire and with a fractured arm due to one of the other competitors (Becky heckin Balaclava) being too excited.

But Touya saved her and she was taken to the infirmary where she and Touya finally had another shippy moment and he comforted her when she cried on about how the whole thing was her fault. And then Becky turned up again and was all over Touya, causing Lisia to get upset and pretty pissed off. Oh and then a poor, sweet, darling, precious little Trubbish got its POOR LITTLE FEELINGS HURT AAAAAAAaaaaah im still Upset.

But Becky was put in her place and dragged off by her Nurse sister and Touya and Lisia had to go their separate ways...so sad.

What are they up to now? Hmm...well a thread has recently started now involving a snowstorm and a garden shed. And Touya and Lisia of course. Doing the cliche thing of sharing body heat while being wrapped up in a blanket. And even though she had been all dressed up for a gala, Touya has no idea he’s cuddling up to Lisia, he thinks its still...not-Lisia, aka the Pokemon Center/Largepaw Incidents girl. And they’re talking about Braveman aka Touya even though Touya aka Braveman doesn’t realise that Not-Lisia aka Lisia is actually Lisia who knows that he’s Braveman aka Touya. hMMMMMM

[umbrahighpriestofgiratina]

Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Tales Of Arrival Chapter 3

Whew, it's been a while hasn't it? This chapter gave me a really hard time since i wasn't sure what to even do with it at first, but i think I figured out something hopefully actually interesting. Now prepare for:

Chapter 3: Dungeon Master's Guide

Kratos, Edbark, and Riki made their way down the path out of the city into a forested area.

"So," said Kratos. "How do we find this mystery meteor? I'd say look for a crater but that only works up close."

"Uh, actually," said Edbark. "I dunno. I didn't think we'd get this far."

"Seriously?!" saiud Riki.

Kratos sighed. "Maybe we should ask the locals."

"What locals? Only wild Pokemon this deep in the woods.""

"What about them?" said Edbark, pointing a paw.

There, down the path, was a stand, manned by a Charmeleon, an Eeevee, and a Pachisru.

"Hey maybe they can help!" said Riki. He rushed over, and Edbark and Kratos followed.

"Welcome, welcome, welcome!" said the Charmeleon, noticing their approach. "I'm Lumine."

"I'm Susan," the Eevee said haughtily, brushing fur from her eyes.

"I'm Chad!" said the Pachisru enthusiastically.

"Do you know the way to that meteor that fell recently?" said Kratos, raising an eyebrow.

"Ah yes!" said Lumine, nodding. "We can help you!"

Kratos already didn't trust this.

"Ooh, help us how?" said Edbark.

"We know a few tricks!" said Susan.

"We have..." Chad held up a strange... device? It just looked like a bunch of metal parts mashed together. "This!"

"What is it?" said Riki.

"It's a lovely Meteor-Find-Inator! With it you'll find where that strange meteor landed in no time."

Yeah Kratos didn't trust this.

"...Edbark, Riki? A moment, if you will?"

The three got in a huddle.

"I want you two to know this is most definitely a scam."

"I didn't see any of them use Slam," said Edbark, confused.

"No, no! SCAM!" said Riki. "It's like when they're trying to rip us off!"

"Rip us off of what?" said Edbark. "We're not on anything sticky."

"He means cheat you out of your money," said Kratos.

"Oh. That. That's mean!" said Edbark.

"Right, so we just refuse and move on," said Kratos.

"Are you three done yet? What are you even talking about?" said Stella.

"Okay, so!" Riki said, turning to face the three and holding Edbark close. "My buddy Edbark here, see, his dad was a Fairy type so he's uh, allergic to all that metal. So we'll pass.

"Is that actually a thing?" said Edbark, whispering.

"Listen if they can bullshit us we can bullshit them," said Riki, whispering back.

The trio of merchants stared then got into their own huddle, whispering intensely. Finally they turned back to the group, seemingly somber looks on their faces.

"It oh so pains me to do this," said Lumine, holding a claw to his head in seeming emotional pain. "But if you won't give us your money..."

He suddenly leapt forward, toward Kratos.

"We'll take it!"

Kratos' instincts kicked in.

He rushed in front of Edbark to defend them, leaped up, ready to call upon his sword and even his Exsphere-

-Only to realize he had none of it left, and he only sent a few blades of air in Lumine's direction before falling flat on his face.

This did cause Lumine to stagger back a bit. Riki grabbed Kratos and turned to Edbark.

"Run!"

The two, Kratos in tow, fled down the forest path, the theiving trio in hot pursuit.

"The Rascal Rouges always get their prize!" said Stella.

"Yeah! Even if we have to beat mons up!" said Chad.

"Is that seriously what you're called?" said Kratos from atop Riki's shoulder.

"I like it!" said Edbark. "And hold on..."

Suddenly the fleeing trio disappeared. The pursuing trio skidded to a halt.

"Where did they go?!" said Chad.

"Curses!" said Lumine. "One of them's a Zorua! He used his Illusion ability! They could be anywhere!

"Start searching then!" said Stella.

The three started combing through trees and bushes.

--------------------

Some distance away, within the trees, a shimmering revealed Kratos, Edbark, and Riki.

"Nice one Edbark!" said Riki.

"Thanks! I've been practicing," said Edbark.

"I suppose it's a good getaway," said Kratos. "But how do we get back to the path?"

"I figure we just sneak down away from where those goons are and get back on the path, easy!" said Riki.

"Hey guys?" said Edbark. "Does the forest floor feel... loose to you? Like it could give way any second?"

It was that exact second that the forest floor indeed gave way and the three tumbled screaming below.

...Well, Edbark and Riki were screaming. Kratos was just annoyed.

------------

The three landed with a loud thud on some strange vegetable matter, which thankfully cushioned their fall. They got up and rubbed their heads.

"What was that?" said Riki, annoyed.

"A pitfall, apparently." said Kratos.

"Uh, g-guys? Take a closer look..."

Kratos and Riki did. And it was then they saw that the walls of the place they fell in were twisting and moving like coiled serpents, with strange chunks of glowing, flickering matter embedded within.

"This isn't a pitfall. This is a m-mystery dungeon," said Edbark.

"...Oh. Oh that ain't good," said Riki.

"You mentioned these, Edbark... Said they were a disease on reality?" said Kratos.

"Y-yeah, and if this one grows it'll overtake everything! Which is why we g-gotta stop it!"

"You don't sound very convinced," said Kratos.

"The chatterbox is right though," said Riki. "These things grow fast and absorb everything!"

"Yeah! We gotta find the core!" said Edbark.

"Very well," said Kratos. "I will assist you."

Where had he heard this all before?

"Now where is that core?" said Edbark.

"It should be deeper in!" said Edbark. "Follow me! I can smell it!"

He started charging down a literally shifting corridor. The other two followed.

------------

The corridor seemed to stretch on for an uncomfortable amount of time. Eventually, however, Edbartk skidded to a stop.

"Guys, look!"

Before the group were some strange gray and white birds, along with multiples of two different kinds of  striped mammals, one that sat on its tail and another that zigzagged around. All, noticeably, had a flckery, unnatural glow to their eyes.

"Oh no... Dungeon ferals," said Edbark. "Some Starly, Zigzagoon, and

"How are they different from regular ferals?" said Kratos.

"Regular ferals just kinda... exist," said Edbark. "They theoretically can think as well as we can, but all their thought processes are focused on survival. Hiding from predators, being predators, eating, making Eggs. Dungeon ferals are ferals that got corrupted by the dungeon's influence. They now only exist to aid the dungeon's spread and protect it from anything. Anyone."

"Yeah they won't stop until you're dead, chased out, or assimilated," said Riki.

Kratos was reminded of the balance back home, the journey of the Chosen, the two worlds, the expspheres, how it all added back up to something very wrong, something he was instrumental in. He knew he was going to have to get to the bottom of this some way, somehow.

"Is there any way we can defeat them?" said Kratos. "Or get around them?"

"That I don't know," said Edbark. They are blocking our way..."

"Charge through them, catch them by suprise with attacks, then try to make an escape," said Kratos.

"Sounds good!" said Riki. "But uh... Can you fight?"

"I did fire those blades of air back wiith the Rascal Rouges... If I can do it again..."

"Alright!" said Edbark. "L-let's do this!"

And then they charged.

The dungeon ferals weren't sure how to react at first as the trio barreled through, but after they got their bearings they lunged without hesitation. The trio countered with blades of air, pulses of darkness, and strong bites, holding them back.

Eventually, fighting their way past the group of dungeon ferals, they saw a path to a glow down below.

"There's our escape!" said Edbark. "Come on!"

The three rushed down the path, then skidded to a halt when they saw what was the other side.

A large glowing, flickering, orb, embedded above them, warping the plant matter about it, spitting out small chunks of itself to spread around the dungeon.

"There's the core!" said Edbark. "We gotta kill it!"

Kratos couldn't stop staring in horror at the core. It seemed like... It was staring back.

He shook his head and fired more air blades at the thing.

The core shuddered, pulsed, then fired a laser at Kratos as a crack appeared on its surface.

Kratos fluttered out of the way just in time as Riki clawed at the orb and Edbark fired blasts of darkness at it. Cracks continued to form on the orb as it fired more lasers until finally it started shaking violently.

"It's gonna blow! Get back!"

The orb, indeed, blew as the three tossed themselves out of the way.

Immediately, the dungeon twisted in a massive upheaval as the group were pushed upward and upward and upward -

And it was over. The dungeon was gone. They were on the forest floor again. A bunch of confused Starly, Sentret, and Zigzagoon gained their bearings and fled into the woods. Edbark cheered.

"Woo! We did it! We beat a mystery dungeon!"

"We did," said Riki. "But weren't we on our way to find that meteor?"

"Oh, right." said Edbark, sheepishly.

"We'll just have to find our way again," said Kratos.sighing.

-----

The three trudged onward through the forest until, finally, they broke through to a field.

There, far off in the distance, was a city.

"We found something!" said Edbark.

"Is it the right something though?"

"Only one way to find out!:" said Rioki.

He and Edbark rushed ahead, Kratos sighed and followed.

Not much had changed.

****

Art time!

Riki by canisares

Riki again by Windskull

Stoakes and Edbark by Delirious Absol

I'm hoping to get the next chapter out sooner rather than later! Gotta make sure to write more of an outline first, that will help.

[ryttu3k]

Time to hit up the Aqua base!

Here’s the details:

Chickweed the Blaziken | level 48 | male | Blaze | Serious, takes plenty of siestas | Flame Charge, Blaze Kick, Double Kick, Cut | starter

Snowdrop the Mightyena | level 46 | female | Intimidate | Lonely, loves to eat | Ice Fang, Crunch, Odor Sleuth, Rock Smash | found route 101

Sage the Claydol | level 42 | no thank you | Levitate | Bold, sturdy body | Earth Power, Extrasensory, Ancient Power, Dazzling Gleam | found route 111

Oleracea the Manectric | level 41 | female | Static | Brave, capable of taking hits | Discharge, Volt Switch, Thunder Wave, Bite | found route 118

Sequoia the Gyarados | level 40 | female | Intimidate | Bashful, nods off a lot | Surf, Ice Fang, Bite, Dragon Rage | found route 106

Edelweiss the Skarmory | level 39 | male | Sturdy | Gentle, very finicky | Assurance, Steel Wing, Fly, Swift | found route 113

Think Oleracea is looking good to tackle lots of Water types. First a quick explore of the northern part of Lilycove, though!

OR A RIVAL BATTLE, THAT TOO. Swellow, level 37, huh? Good thing Oleracea is in the lead! Next is Swampert, level 39. Still no Grass moves, so Snowdrop can just spam Crunch. She is like seven levels higher, haha. Next up, Breloom, level 37. Chickweed is eleven levels higher RIP. Oops, Effect Spore. Now he’s asleep, haha. ...And just went up ANOTHER level jfc XD Next, Magcargo, level 37. And this is Sequoia’s! Hell yes she can learn Crunch.

Aqua Grunt tells Atsuko not to go to the cave in the cove. Because they’re an adult and they say so. WELL IN THAT CASE.

Actually. Department store! Not doing secret bases... oh, TMs. Nope, none of those. Vitamins, nope I’m good. Okay, onwards XD

Rest TM, gotcha. And a Poke Flute!

Anyway. ‘Sup Aqua base here comes a twelve-year-old on a Gyarados. I like the plants and waterfalls, very nice!

First grunt! He leads with Grimer, level 35. That’s Sage’s! Okay lmfao that Sludge Wave did only 6 HP damage. ATTEMPTS WERE MADE. And now it’s dead XD Next is Carvanha, level 35. Oleracea’s - fuck it - Oli’s turn!

Next one in this room! Just a single Golbat, level 37. Oli’s already out, she can take it!

I love the grunts here. Not slacking off, just making very important drink decisions!

Oh, here’s one on the ball. Leads with Mightyena, level 34. Over to Chickie! Next is Golbat, level 36, let’s go with Sage, this time!

PROJECT AZOTH File No. 2 We intend to analyze the power of the ultimate weapon used in Kalos 3,000 years ago and work on the development of a drill weapon utilizing the technology. The Seafloor Cavern is sealed by the power of a Legendary Pokemon. The only way to gain access to the cavern is to break the seal with power that exceeds that of the Pokemon. According to the report from the Petalburg recon team, Devon Corporation holds the secret of the technology of the ultimate weapon. We will dedicate all our resources to obtaining this technology.

I would legit want to see a game with Devon Corp as the main antagonists.

Oh hey, Shelly’s room! And the picture of her, Archie, and JIRACHI. Please give us that backstory!!

‘SUP MATT STEALING YOUR DARK PULSE TM. Bro Special Vol 7. So ridic cute.

Oops a grunt XD She leads with Carvanha, level 35. Oli takes it. Next is Grimer, level 35. Edel’s a bit underlevelled compared to the rest (not to the Grimer, he’s on 40), so he can do this one!

Single grunt with Mightyena, level 37. Over to Chickie!

Aaand Archie's room! I'm pretty sure like three of these four Pokeballs are Splodeys... Nugget! Splodey. ...Splodey. MASTER BALL. Nice. And onwards!

“Ahahahah! You really kept me waiting!” Sorry Grunt was robbing your leader’s room. He just has Carvanha, level 37. Oli takes it!

THE QUINTUPLETS. These puppers are all level 18. A Discharge manages them! Sorry, puppers!

HEY MATT FIGHT ME. Okay Matt chill a bit XD His Sharpedo is now at level 39. Oli is at 43, so unsurprisingly, it’s a OHKO. lmfao Chickie is now at level 50.

Aaaand there goes Archie. Whoops. Matt totally has a crush, doesn’t he.

Alright, where next? Mossdeep, IIRC, gonna need that Dive HM.

Oh dang, was hoping to avoid trainers, haha. Anyway, Swimmer Roland has a Sealeo, level 39, Oli OHKOs it.

Anyway. To Mossdeep! Super Rod get! Quash TM get! King’s Rock get!

And time for the gym! Snowdrop is level 47 should be good.

Psychic Preston has a Kadabra, level 42. Cronch.

Psychic Joshua leads with Kadabra, level 40. Cronch. Next up, Medicham, level 40. This is Edel’s! JFC IT SURVIVED FLY, HIGH JUMP KICKED, AND WOULD HAVE TAKEN EDEL OUT IF NOT FOR STURDY.

Okay, we’re good. Next is Psychic Fritz, who leads with Claydol, level 39. Mine’s better. Cronch. Next is Starmie, level 41. Oli can have this one!

Hex Maniac Patricia has a Chimecho, level 41. Cronch.

And time for the twins! If memory serves me, they have Solrock and Lunatone? Yup, level 45. Snowdrop (level 48) and Sequoia (level 47) are on the case! Ooh, double Intimidates ;D Cronch, Cronch, Lunatone survives, Solrock doesn’t. Light Screen isn’t gonna save you now, buddy. Cronch, and down!

Mind Badge get! Now I just need the Dive HM!

Well that sounds worrisome. Very worried crowd, also Steven. Oh, and there’s Dive. Very convenient! Let’s see... yup, let’s replace Dragon Rage. Pretty useless at this point!

LET’S GO DIVING... ...and because it’s time for dinner, we’ll stop here, at the entrance of Seafloor Cavern!

Current Team

Chickweed the Blaziken | level 50 | male | Blaze | Serious, takes plenty of siestas | Flame Charge, Blaze Kick, Double Kick, Cut | starter

Snowdrop the Mightyena | level 48 | female | Intimidate | Lonely, loves to eat | Ice Fang, Crunch, Odor Sleuth, Rock Smash | found route 101

Sage the Claydol | level 45 | no thank you | Levitate | Bold, sturdy body | Earth Power, Extrasensory, Ancient Power, Dazzling Gleam | found route 111

Oleracea the Manectric | level 44 | female | Static | Brave, capable of taking hits | Discharge, Volt Switch, Thunder Wave, Bite | found route 118

Sequoia the Gyarados | level 42 | female | Intimidate | Bashful, nods off a lot | Surf, Ice Fang, Crunch, Dive | found route 106

Edelweiss the Skarmory | level 42 | male | Sturdy | Gentle, very finicky | Assurance, Steel Wing, Fly, Swift | found route 113

Reserves

Wattle the Taillow | level 9 | female | Guts | Quirky, alert to sounds | Peck, Growl, Focus Energy, Quick Attack | found Petalburg Woods

Bristlecone the Zigzagoon | level 14 | female | Gluttony | Lonely, good endurance | Tackle, Headbutt, Baby-Doll Eyes, Odor Sleuth | found route 103

Onion the Whismur | level 16 | female | Soundproof | Adamant, likes to relax | Pound, Echoed Voice, Astonish, Howl | found Rusturf Tunnel

Poison Ivy the Tentacool | level 5 | male | Liquid Ooze | Sassy, capable of taking hits | Poison Sting, Supersonic | found Dewford Town

Euphorbia the Makuhita | level 12 | male | Thick Fat | Hardy, capable of taking hits | Focus Energy, Sand Attack, Arm Thrust, Fake Out | found Granite Cave

Lithops the Numel | level 14 | female | Simple | Quiet, likes to run | Tackle, Ember, Focus Energy, Magnitude | found route 112

Rauvolfia the Seviper | level 19 | male | Shed Skin | Careful, impetuous and silly | Poison Tail, Screech, Venoshock, Glare | found route 114

Moraea the Spoink | level 23 | female | Own Tempo |  Quirky, quick tempered | Psybeam, Psych Up, Confuse Ray, Magic Coat | found Jagged Pass

Agapanthus the Pelipper | level 33 | male | Keen Eye | Modest, a little quick-tempered | Water Pulse, Wing Attack, Steel Wing, Quick Attack | found route 104

Rosemary the Latias | level 30 | female | Levitate | Sassy, somewhat vain | Heal Pulse, Dragon Breath, Mist Ball, Psycho Shift | found Southern Island

Milkweed the Beautifly | level 26 | female | Swarm | Lax, somewhat stubborn | Air Cutter, Mega Drain, Silver Wind, Morning Sun | found route 102

Hydrangea the Kecleon | level 25 | male | Color Change | Lonely, often lost in thought | Feint Attack, Psybeam, Ancient Power, Slash | found route 119

Sunflower the Castform | level 30 | female | Forecast | Lax, mischievous Rain Dance, Sunny Day, Hail, Weather Ball | found Weather Institute

Banana the Tropius | level 27 | male | Solar Power | Brave, a little quick tempered | Stomp, Magical Leaf, Whirlwind, Leaf Tornado | found route 120

Uniflora the Shuppet | level 28 | female | Insomnia | Mild, alert to sounds | Will-O-Wisp, Feint Attack, Hex, Curse | found route 121

Monotropa the Duskull | level 28 | female | Levitate | Naughty, loves to eat | Foresight, Shadow Sneak, Pursuit, Will-O-Wisp | found Mt Pyre

Dead

Catnip the Skitty, found route 116, killed by Lass Janice’s Marill in route 116

Daisy the Pikachu, found Slateport City, killed by Archie’s Sharpedo at Mount Chimney

[ryttu3k]

Up to Fortree we go!

The current team:

Chickweed the Blaziken | level 37 | male | Blaze | Serious, takes plenty of siestas | Flame Charge, Blaze Kick, Double Kick, Cut | starter

Snowdrop the Mightyena | level 34 | female | Intimidate | Lonely, loves to eat | Ice Fang, Bite, Odor Sleuth, Rock Smash | found route 101

Sequoia the Gyarados | level 30 | female | Intimidate | Bashful, nods off a lot | Surf, Tackle, Bite, Dragon Rage | found route 106

Edelweiss the Skarmory | level 27 | male | Sturdy | Gentle, very finicky | Assurance, Steel Wing, Sky Drop, Swift | found route 113

Sage the Baltoy | level 27 | no thank you | Levitate | Bold, sturdy body | Rock Tomb, Psybeam, Ancient Power, Dazzling Gleam | found route 111

Oleracea the Electrike | level 15 | female | Static | Brave, capable of taking hits | Thunder Wave, Spark, Howl, Quick Attack | found route 118

Oleracea Snowdrop, Sage are going to be doing the heavy lifting for Fortree Gym, particularly Oleracea. Looks like the strongest Pokemon there is 35 - Chickweed is actually already over that level, although, uh, definitely not letting him anywhere near a Flying gym lmfao.

So. 20 levels to go. No biggie.

First trainer encounter! Bug Catcher Greg has a Beautifly, level 29. A Flame Charge dispenses of it (after he tanks an Air Cutter - I have Oleracea leading.)

Bug Catcher Kent has a Dustox, level 29! Hey, twins. Gonna give Sage a try. Hmm, Psybeam was SE but only did half damage WITH a crit, and they’re vulnerable to Silver Wind. Gotta work on that! Oh well, back to Chickweed, haha. Huh, IT had Psybeam too XD Flame Charge takes care of it.

Next up, Bug Catcher Doug leads with Volbeat, level 26. Chickie takes it. Next is Illumise, level 28. Let’s give Edel a shot! NYOOM. Wow, hits hard but still no OHKO? Aaand it’s down, haha.

NO, SAGE, YOU ARE NOT LEARNING SELF-DESTRUCT :|

Bug Maniac Donald has a Beautifly, level 30. Flame Charge hits hard. Whoops, Whirlwinded out! You know what let’s see if li’l Oleracea can take it out - she caaaan!

Bug Maniac Brent leads with Masquerain, level 28. Maybe Sage? Nope, too slow, got hit twice and got into the yellows in the time it took to land a Rock Tomb. Okay, Chickweed can finish it off. Paralysis you dick - never mind he still hit it XD Next up is Ninjask, level 28. This one DOES outspeed Chickweed, but it doesn’t do too much damage before it’s down!

Finally, Bug Maniac Taylor, then I think we’re out of the long grass XD Dustox, level 30. Gonna give this to Edel! Only into the yellows, that’s okay. Silver Wind does... like nothing. Second Sky Drop does it!

...So much for all those healing items, there’s a house here XD

Hey, a Ranger! Pokemon Ranger Catherine has a Breloom, level 31 <3 This calls for Chickweed! I’m just picturing Chickie being like, “...you fight good.”

Anyway, local trainers taken care of, time to catch! And it is... Kecleon! Okay XD He will be named Hydrangea, because colour change!

Ooh, Brains and Brawn team, Jael and Kael! Kadabra and Machoke, levels 31. Let’s get Snowdrop out here for the Kadabra and Edel for the Machoke! RIP Kadabra, OHKOed XD Whoops, Sky Drop was NOT a OHKO and Snowdrop tanked a Vital Throw, let’s get someone in who isn’t weak to Fighting... Sage should do it! Only gets in a single Psybeam before the next Sky Drop takes it out, haha.

JFC. I have minions now.

Ranger Jackson leads with Seviper, level 29. Oh dear, it has Night Slash. I’m glad I went with Edel and NOT Sage! Next is Vigoroth level 29, that’s Chickweed’s! OHKO!

Bird Keeper Hugh has a Swellow, level 30.  Is Oleracea strong enough to take it? Let’s see... not quite, at level 22 her Thunder Fang does like a third damage XD At least she paralyses it via Static, though! UUUGH DOUBLE TEAM. Snowdrop still finishes it off with Ice Fang!

Bird Keeper Phil has a Doduo, level 30. After a VERY TENSE battle, Oleracea manages it all on her own!! <3

Oooh, I see the Weather Institute up ahead. And Aqua! “Hey don’t go into the Weather Institute!” “Okay. *goes in*”

First grunt leads with Mightyena, level 28. This is Chickweed’s! Ayyy and he hits level 40! Next is Golbat, level 28. Oleracea is still a bit low, so this is Sage’s! They get poisoned and take some damage, but still 2HKO it!

Next grunt! Ew, Grimer. Level 30. This one is aaaall Sage’s! AHHH STOP MINIMISING. FINE. EDEL HAS SWIFT. Ha, it can’t hit him with Mud Bomb OR Sludge Bomb!

SHELLY. HI SENPAI. I love her she passes science classes. Oi Grunt your boss has already stopped! Oh well. He leads with Carvanha, level 28. Oleracea OHKOs it!! Next is Mightnyena, level 28. All Chickweed’s!

Last grunt! Has Golbat, level 30. Okay, Thunder Fang doesn’t do much, let’s get in Sage. Extrasensory takes care of it!

“I wonder why that is... Maybe we’re destined to be together...” SHELLY I’M TWELVE. Oh okay I guess we’re battling. Sharpedo, level 32. Oh crap Swagger - good, Thunder Fang right down to yellows! Slash down to the reds YIKES. Fuck it Chickweed is like eight levels higher. Double Kick finishes it off!

PLOT. Okay, will pop downstairs to box someone and get Castform! Just reserves, I think.

Sunflower the Castform | level 30 | female | Forecast | Lax, mischievous Rain Dance, Sunny Day, Hail, Weather Ball | found Weather Institute

Healed up, and onwards!

Hey, it’s Brendan! TIME FOR BATTLE. He leads with Shroomish, level 31. Chickweed gets poisoned, but Flame Charge takes care of it! Next is Marshtomp, man I really have nothing good against them... well, it’s level 33, Snowdrop is level 37, let’s just go for pure OP, haha. Chomp chomp! Last is Slugma, level 31. Sequoia sends it on a lovely surfing trip :’)

AWW YES FLY HM. I need to beat Winona first, but found the replacement for Edel’s Sky Drop!

Alright, Hidden Power! Let’s see what everyone has! Oleracea has Psychic, Snowdrop has Fighting, Sequoia has Fighting, Edel has Bug, Sage has Dragon, and Chickweed has Poison. Hmm.

Iiiii spy a Steven~! Oh bye Steven. On to route 120, then!

Parasol Lady Clarissa leads with Goldeen, level 31. Oh Aqua Ring you pest. Okay, spamming Thunder Fang it is, then! Ayyy eat that crit! Next is Seaking, level 33. Oleracea took a hit there, so I’m going to bring in Snowdrop. Oooof Waterfall hits hard - oh that was a crit, nvm. Couple of Bites and it’s down!

Oleracea evoooolves! And our first encounter is... Linoone XD Dupes clause!

Bird Keeper Robert has a Swablu, level 34. Baby <3 Oleracea 2HKOs it!

TROPIUS :D The best part is because I’m doing a plant theme I actually can call him Banana.

Oh thank god my second (well, third after Linoone) was Gloom. Much happier with Tropius, haha.

Anyway. Off to say hi to Steven, and to pick a fight with a Kecleon! Well, not much fight, it was a OHKO from Chickweed XD BETTER GIFT: BLAZIKENITE.

I am now going to test it on this completely helpless and innocent Linoone.

God, I’ve missed Mega Evolution. Linoone gets Double Kicked into the STRATOSPHERE.

Back into town, I want to see what that TM is. Oh, Grass Knot! Dang, only one that can learn it is Sage, and I wouldn’t want to put them against a Water type. Oh well.

Still got to train more before the gym, I want to get Oleracea to at least 30, but we’ve made some really good progress!

Current Team

Chickweed the Blaziken | level 41 | male | Blaze | Serious, takes plenty of siestas | Flame Charge, Blaze Kick, Double Kick, Cut | starter

Snowdrop the Mightyena | level 38 | female | Intimidate | Lonely, loves to eat | Ice Fang, Bite, Odor Sleuth, Rock Smash | found route 101

Sequoia the Gyarados | level 33 | female | Intimidate | Bashful, nods off a lot | Surf, Ice Fang, Bite, Dragon Rage | found route 106

Sage the Baltoy | level 33 | no thank you | Levitate | Bold, sturdy body | Rock Tomb, Extrasensory, Ancient Power, Dazzling Gleam | found route 111

Edelweiss the Skarmory | level 32 | male | Sturdy | Gentle, very finicky | Assurance, Steel Wing, Sky Drop, Swift | found route 113

Oleracea the Manectric | level 27 | female | Static | Brave, capable of taking hits | Thunder Wave, Thunder Fang, Bite, Quick Attack | found route 118

Reserves

Wattle the Taillow | level 9 | female | Guts | Quirky, alert to sounds | Peck, Growl, Focus Energy, Quick Attack | found Petalburg Woods

Bristlecone the Zigzagoon | level 14 | female | Gluttony | Lonely, good endurance | Tackle, Headbutt, Baby-Doll Eyes, Odor Sleuth | found route 103

Onion the Whismur | level 16 | female | Soundproof | Adamant, likes to relax | Pound, Echoed Voice, Astonish, Howl | found Rusturf Tunnel

Poison Ivy the Tentacool | level 5 | male | Liquid Ooze | Sassy, capable of taking hits | Poison Sting, Supersonic | found Dewford Town

Euphorbia the Makuhita | level 12 | male | Thick Fat | Hardy, capable of taking hits | Focus Energy, Sand Attack, Arm Thrust, Fake Out | found Granite Cave

Lithops the Numel | level 14 | female | Simple | Quiet, likes to run | Tackle, Ember, Focus Energy, Magnitude | found route 112

Rauvolfia the Seviper | level 19 | male | Shed Skin | Careful, impetuous and silly | Poison Tail, Screech, Venoshock, Glare | found route 114

Moraea the Spoink | level 23 | female | Own Tempo |  Quirky, quick tempered | Psybeam, Psych Up, Confuse Ray, Magic Coat | found Jagged Pass

Agapanthus the Pelipper | level 33 | male | Keen Eye | Modest, a little quick-tempered | Water Pulse, Wing Attack, Steel Wing, Quick Attack | found route 104

Rosemary the Latias | level 30 | female | Levitate | Sassy, somewhat vain | Heal Pulse, Dragon Breath, Mist Ball, Psycho Shift | found Southern Island

Milkweed the Beautifly | level 26 | female | Swarm | Lax, somewhat stubborn | Air Cutter, Mega Drain, Silver Wind, Morning Sun | found route 102

Hydrangea the Kecleon | level 25 | male | Color Change | Lonely, often lost in thought | Feint Attack, Psybeam, Ancient Power, Slash | found route 119

Sunflower the Castform | level 30 | female | Forecast | Lax, mischievous Rain Dance, Sunny Day, Hail, Weather Ball | found Weather Institute

Banana the Tropius | level 27 | male | Solar Power | Brave, a little quick tempered | Stomp, Magical Leaf, Whirlwind, Leaf Tornado | found route 120

Dead

Catnip the Skitty, found route 116, killed by Lass Janice’s Marill in route 116

Daisy the Pikachu, found Slateport City, killed by Archie’s Sharpedo at Mount Chimney

[ryttu3k]

Time for Atsuko to face PLOT.

The team:

Chickweed the Blaziken | level 50 | male | Blaze | Serious, takes plenty of siestas | Flame Charge, Blaze Kick, Double Kick, Cut | starter

Snowdrop the Mightyena | level 48 | female | Intimidate | Lonely, loves to eat | Ice Fang, Crunch, Odor Sleuth, Rock Smash | found route 101

Sage the Claydol | level 45 | no thank you | Levitate | Bold, sturdy body | Earth Power, Extrasensory, Ancient Power, Dazzling Gleam | found route 111

Oleracea the Manectric | level 44 | female | Static | Brave, capable of taking hits | Discharge, Volt Switch, Thunder Wave, Bite | found route 118

Sequoia the Gyarados | level 42 | female | Intimidate | Bashful, nods off a lot | Surf, Ice Fang, Crunch, Dive | found route 106

Edelweiss the Skarmory | level 42 | male | Sturdy | Gentle, very finicky | Assurance, Steel Wing, Fly, Swift | found route 113

...Good luck, everyone XD;;

Hmm. I am going to need someone with Strength - oh whoops, first encounter. Golbat. Well, them’s the rules! Level 33 female, will name her Tacca. Bat flowers!

Anyway. Strength. Okay, Oli’s Bite is a bit redundant considering Snowdrop and Sequoia both have Crunch (and Snowdrop’s is STAB). Now, on to that Grunt! Leads with Carvanha, level 39. Oli makes quick work of it. Next is Mightyena, level 39. I mean, level 50 Fighting type, so...

Next Grunt, has Golbat, level 41. Oli’s again!

Next room, next Grunt. Carvanha, level 41, Oli’s again. This feels familiar!

Okay, dead end or ledge. Let’s backtrack. Block puzzle XD;;

And now a water puzzle! Scald TM! Ugh I need to keep Surf and Dive on Sequoia, or I’d totally go for it.

More blocks, and a grunt! Leads with Mightyena, level 38. Over to Chickweed, now level 51. Sorry, pupper. Next is Muk, level 40. Over to Sage! Oops, not quite a OHKO and Sage took a poison. Took it down next move and got all healed up.

Block puzzle again. So many blocks.

EARTHQUAKE TM. ...No one for now. Sage is a special attacker and 100 physical power on 72 atk is not as good as 90 special power on 87 sp.atk... I think?

This path looks very ominous. Pretty sure Archie leads with Mightyena, so Chickie to the lead!

ATSUKO NEEDS AN ADULT.

ALRIGHT ARCHIE YOU’RE ON. Yup, first up, Mightyena, level 41. You want Mega Evolution? Try a level 51 Blaziken Double Kicking your pup to Alola! Next up is Muk, level 41. All yours, Sage! Earth Power, they tank a Gunk Shot, and finish it off with Extrasensory! Next, Crobat, level 41! Sage CAN take this, but we’ll give it to Oli instead. Oops, Poison Fang. Poisoned but she’s okay, OHKOs it with Discharge! Last up is Sharpedo, level 43. Too bad, Oli still OHKOs it ;D

Atsuko’s determined li’l face is so cute. SEE, SUN AND MOON. YOU CAN MAKE PROTAGS EMOTE.

Shelly PLEASE be the voice of reason. Oh goddammit Archie. And Shelly and Maxie just run off and leave the twelve-year-old there thanks guys.

YOU FUCKED UP ARCHIE.

Yup just leave the twelve-year-old on a sandbar in the middle of an apocalyptic storm thanks guys. Oh FINALLY Steven shows up. How about a lift to Sootopolis? STEVEN WHY ARE YOU LEAVING THE CHILD THERE TOO. So rude! Everyone is so rude! I’ll just go to Sootopolis MYSELF FINE JEEZ.

Oh there you are Steven. Hi, Steven! Hi, Steven’s friend who is definitely not wearing underwear! I love how the scene is like, uber serious but then there’s Wallace who’s dressed like a stripper. Aquas and a Magma! I now have a hella wetsuit.

“No. You are not acting as a mere child today.” TWELVE YEARS OLD.

“... ... ... Sorry. I’m begging, so... Save us... the world... and Kyogre...” COOL BEGGING, STILL TWELVE.

Oh hi Brendan. That’s nice of you. My best friend is Wally, though.

Into the Cave of Origin!

First encounter... Golbat. Dupes clause! Ohh, SABLEYE. Nice! He’s level 35. Name... Ebony.

And... we’re here. Atsuko suits up! HI KYOGRE I LOVE YOU AND YOU’RE SILLY-LOOKING.

I do love Archie’s message tbh.

Alrighty. Methods. Of my team members, Chickweed and Sage are right out, they’re both weak to Water. Sequoia and Edel both resist Water, so they’re my best options. Sequoia’s actually a bit tankier, so once it’s paralysed, I’ll switch to her. My battle plan is: throw a Quick Ball. If that doesn’t work, Thunder Wave, do as much damage as I can, then throw my Net Ball. If that doesn’t work, Master Ball. I do not want to turn this into a prolonged battle, that’s how you get your Pokemon killed!

Man, Primal Kyogre looks so much cooler than the regular forme.

Quick Ball fails. It did get to the third rock, though! Body Slam, Oli tanks it. Thunder Wave and it’s paralysed! Can’t move :D Volt Switch it - oof, that did like no damage - and switch to Sequoia. She gets a Crunch in, then it Aqua Rings, oof. Another Crunch. It uses Origin Pulse, Sequoia tanks it. She’s on just over half, so I’ll try the Net Ball now? Nope. Paralysed, hah. Ohh, Crunched into the reds! Heck, let’s try a Premier Ball. For funsies. Okay no that didn’t work XD Yeah alright after more healing/damage/et cetera, I’ll just throw the fuckin’ Master Ball XD;;

Kyogre get. I will name you Wakame.

Saved the world <3

“It’s... so warm...”

Got the Blue Orb, the Eon Flute, and the dokis.

What an interesting red flower near the tree :)

Sablenite, Brick Break TM, Infestation TM in the most alarming dialogue, Wailmer doll, and we shall call it a day! :D

Current Team

Chickweed the Blaziken | level 52 | male | Blaze | Serious, takes plenty of siestas | Flame Charge, Blaze Kick, Double Kick, Cut | starter

Snowdrop the Mightyena | level 50 | female | Intimidate | Lonely, loves to eat | Ice Fang, Crunch, Odor Sleuth, Rock Smash | found route 101

Sage the Claydol | level 47 | no thank you | Levitate | Bold, sturdy body | Earth Power, Extrasensory, Ancient Power, Dazzling Gleam | found route 111

Oleracea the Manectric | level 46 | female | Static | Brave, capable of taking hits | Discharge, Volt Switch, Thunder Wave, Strength | found route 118

Sequoia the Gyarados | level 44 | female | Intimidate | Bashful, nods off a lot | Surf, Ice Fang, Crunch, Dive | found route 106

Edelweiss the Skarmory | level 43 | male | Sturdy | Gentle, very finicky | Assurance, Steel Wing, Fly, Swift | found route 113

Reserves

Wattle the Taillow | level 9 | female | Guts | Quirky, alert to sounds | Peck, Growl, Focus Energy, Quick Attack | found Petalburg Woods

Bristlecone the Zigzagoon | level 14 | female | Gluttony | Lonely, good endurance | Tackle, Headbutt, Baby-Doll Eyes, Odor Sleuth | found route 103

Onion the Whismur | level 16 | female | Soundproof | Adamant, likes to relax | Pound, Echoed Voice, Astonish, Howl | found Rusturf Tunnel

Poison Ivy the Tentacool | level 5 | male | Liquid Ooze | Sassy, capable of taking hits | Poison Sting, Supersonic | found Dewford Town

Euphorbia the Makuhita | level 12 | male | Thick Fat | Hardy, capable of taking hits | Focus Energy, Sand Attack, Arm Thrust, Fake Out | found Granite Cave

Lithops the Numel | level 14 | female | Simple | Quiet, likes to run | Tackle, Ember, Focus Energy, Magnitude | found route 112

Rauvolfia the Seviper | level 19 | male | Shed Skin | Careful, impetuous and silly | Poison Tail, Screech, Venoshock, Glare | found route 114

Moraea the Spoink | level 23 | female | Own Tempo |  Quirky, quick tempered | Psybeam, Psych Up, Confuse Ray, Magic Coat | found Jagged Pass

Agapanthus the Pelipper | level 33 | male | Keen Eye | Modest, a little quick-tempered | Water Pulse, Wing Attack, Steel Wing, Quick Attack | found route 104

Rosemary the Latias | level 30 | female | Levitate | Sassy, somewhat vain | Heal Pulse, Dragon Breath, Mist Ball, Psycho Shift | found Southern Island

Milkweed the Beautifly | level 26 | female | Swarm | Lax, somewhat stubborn | Air Cutter, Mega Drain, Silver Wind, Morning Sun | found route 102

Hydrangea the Kecleon | level 25 | male | Color Change | Lonely, often lost in thought | Feint Attack, Psybeam, Ancient Power, Slash | found route 119

Sunflower the Castform | level 30 | female | Forecast | Lax, mischievous Rain Dance, Sunny Day, Hail, Weather Ball | found Weather Institute

Banana the Tropius | level 27 | male | Solar Power | Brave, a little quick tempered | Stomp, Magical Leaf, Whirlwind, Leaf Tornado | found route 120

Uniflora the Shuppet | level 28 | female | Insomnia | Mild, alert to sounds | Will-O-Wisp, Feint Attack, Hex, Curse | found route 121

Monotropa the Duskull | level 28 | female | Levitate | Naughty, loves to eat | Foresight, Shadow Sneak, Pursuit, Will-O-Wisp | found Mt Pyre

Tacca the Golbat | level 33 | female | Inner Focus | Hardy, strong-willed | Air Cutter, Switft, Poison Fang, Mean Look | found Seafloor Cavern

Ebony the Sableye | level 35 | male | Keen Eye | Calm, highly curious | Knock Off, Shadow Claw, Confuse Ray, Zen Headbutt | found Cave of Origin

Wakame the Kyogre | level 45 | no thank you | Drizzle | Sassy, mischievous | Body Slam, Aqua Ring, Ice Beam, Origin Pulse | found Cave of Origin

Dead

Catnip the Skitty, found route 116, killed by Lass Janice’s Marill in route 116

Daisy the Pikachu, found Slateport City, killed by Archie’s Sharpedo at Mount Chimney

[ryttu3k]

After some really tedious grinding, let’s go fight some birds! Then, to Lilycove!

The current team:

Chickweed the Blaziken | level 43 | male | Blaze | Serious, takes plenty of siestas | Flame Charge, Blaze Kick, Double Kick, Cut | starter

Snowdrop the Mightyena | level 40 | female | Intimidate | Lonely, loves to eat | Ice Fang, Bite, Odor Sleuth, Rock Smash | found route 101

Sage the Baltoy | level 36 | no thank you | Levitate | Bold, sturdy body | Rock Tomb, Extrasensory, Ancient Power, Dazzling Gleam | found route 111

Sequoia the Gyarados | level 35 | female | Intimidate | Bashful, nods off a lot | Surf, Ice Fang, Bite, Dragon Rage | found route 106

Edelweiss the Skarmory | level 34 | male | Sturdy | Gentle, very finicky | Assurance, Steel Wing, Sky Drop, Swift | found route 113

Oleracea the Manectric | level 33 | female | Static | Brave, capable of taking hits | Discharge, Volt Switch, Thunder Wave, Bite | found route 118

Lovely nice numbers, haha. 36, 35, 34, 33! Also, yes, Sage has not yet evolved. I want them to learn Earth Power at level 37 before they do, otherwise I have to wait until level 40.

Highest-levelled Pokemon at the gym is level 35. Honestly Oleracea should probably hit that INSIDE the gym. And on we go!

Bird Keeper Jared leads with Swellow, level 30. Discharge OHKO! Good start, haha. Next is Skarmory, level 30. Let’s give that to Chickweed, actually, save that PP! It’s not a OHKO but only because of Sturdy XD

Picknicker Kylee has a Swablu, level 31. Another easy OHKO!

Camper Terrell leads with Doduo, level 28. Next, Pelipper, level 30. Easy pair of OHKOs!

Bird Keeper Will has a Dodrio, level 32. More OHKO!

Bird Keeper Bran has Pelipper, level 32. Et cetera.

So that’s OHKO for every Pokemon in the gym before Winona except the Skarmory with Sturdy XD Time for the actual gym battle! She leads with Swellow, level 33. It uses Quick Attack, Oleracea OHKOs it. Next is Altaria, level 35. Oooh right part Dragon - ACK Earthquake, down to the reds! Alright, Snowdrop is in! Yeah, that Earthquake didn’t do much. Ice Fang does it! Next up is Skarmory, level 33, let’s make this a real team thing and get in Chickweed! OHKO, no Sturdy here! Last is a level 33 Pelipper, and Oleracea can finish things off with a Discharge OHKO!

Nice nice :D And now Sage evolves, and I can replace Sky Drop with Fly!

ONWARDS.

I see you there, Ninja kid! You don’t scare me, I have a fully-evolved Psychic/Ground-type now! Ninja Boy Tsunao leads with Koffing, level 29. CHECK OUT MY LEVEL 37 CLAYDOL... or not because it self-destructed XD Another Koffing, level 30, and this one gets to eat Extrasensory! Finally, a level 31, and the same!

That was so satisfying.

Parasol Lady Angelica has a Castform, level 34! And it’s raining, so Discharge will work extra nicely ;D

Ace Trainer Jennifer has a Milotic! <3 Level 36, ooh, we’re actually getting HIGHER than Oleracea. She takes it out, then gets a nice heal-up.

Bug Maniac Brandon has a Masquerain, level 34. Discharge OHKO!

*weeps gently at every Absol call*

Oh my gosh found a Light Ball. Too bad my Pikachu is fucking dead.

Street Thug Gomez has a Cacturne, level 34. Yeah, Chickweed’s!

Ninja Boy Keigo leads with Ninjask, level 32. Chickweed again! Next is Koffing, level 30, and that’s Sage!

Ruin Maniac Chip leads with a Baltoy! I have a Claydol :D Snowdrop is only ten levels higher no biggie. Next is Nosepass, also level 32, and this is Edel’s! Whoa it has Discharge. No harm done, Edel is pretty sturdy. No pun intended.

Delinquent Sharlene has a Sharpedo, level 34. A satisfying Discharge OHKO!

Ranger Carlos has a Nuzleaf, level 33. Oh hey, wasn’t a Nuzleaf the origin of the word ‘Nuzlocke’? Either way, let’s try out Edel’s Sky. And it’s a OHKO! Next is Manectric! I have one of those. Time for Sage to show off their new Earth Power! And another OHKO!

My physical fitness is rubbish, thanks, Ranger Jenna XD;; She leads with Lombre, level 33. Discharge down to the yellows, Water Sport does... fuck all, another to finish it off. Next is Grumpig, level 33, and this one is all Snowdrop’s!

On to route 121!

Hex Maniac Tammy leads with Duskull, level 33. That’s Snowdrop’s! Next is Sableye, tricky. Only thing that’s SE is Fairy, but my only Fairy move is on my Psychic-type. Which. Yeah. I might keep Snowdrop in, because at least she’s strong and has other moves. Yeah, Ice Fang does about half damage. Shadow Claw from Sableye doesn’t do much at all, and another Ice Fang finishes it!

Beauty Jessica leads with Kecleon, level 32. Please beat it up, Chickweed XD;; While Mega Evolved, because hell yeah. Next is Seviper, level 34. All Sage’s!

GASP. AQUAS. They’re heading to Mount Pyre. Oh, and here’s Safari Zone! Maybe later.

Teammates Kate and Joy have a Slaking and Spinda, levels 35 and 34. I’ll get Chickweed in, and sic Snowdrop on the Spinda. Oof, Psybeam to Chickweed, you little shit. He kicks Slaking down, and Snowdrop finishes off the Spinda. Holy shit YES Snowdrop you can learn Crunch :D

Poke Fan Vanessa has a Pikachu! Sob. Level 35. Let’s get Sage in! Easy OHKO.

And my first route encounter is... a Shuppet! Hey, that works! She shall be named... Uniflora, as in Ghost Pipe.

Oh, Lilycove! Well, I’ll heal up, then head for Mount Pyre!

Back to route 121. Gentleman Walter has a Manectric, level 35. Here’s mine! Or, well, not, here’s Sage XD

Haha, there was a healer right near the entrance to Mt Pyre. Of course there was.

Okay lmfao looks like I’ve caught everything thus far available on route 122, so no catches here!

In to Mt Pyre! I already have a Shuppet, so let’s see what else is here...

Oh, Poke Maniac Mark and his Lairon, level 36 XD Double Kick from Chickweed handles it!

Ooh, a cleanse tag.

You know, Atsuko probably buries Daisy here :(

Duskull! That’s my catch, then. Monotropa, then? The genus name of Ghost Pipe!

Psychic William leads with a Staryu, level 35. Discharge takes it down! Next is Grumpig, level 35. That’s Snowdrop’s! Cronch.

Last for this level is Hex Maniac Valerie, and Sableye, level 36. Uuugh damn Sableye. Volt Switch does a fair bit of damage, switching to Snowdrop to finish it!

Black Belt Atsushi has a Machoke, level 37. Over to Sage!

“When I told everyone I can talk to Pokemon, they became concerned for me...” Interesting words from Fairy Tale Girl Momo! She has a Jigglypuff, level 35. All yours, Edel!

Young Couple Dez and Luke have a Manectric and a Delcatty, levels 36. First step, get some better fighters in, haha. Chickweed and Sage can take these two! Oh FUCKING Sing... Sage Earth Powers the Manectric, and once Chickweed wakes up, he... immediately gets hit by Attract from the Delcatty are you fucking. Ayyy he got the hit out anyway! Nice.

Man I’m just gonna skip the trainers on this level.

:D Shadow Ball and Medichamite! Nice.

Ooh, there’s Medicham in the outdoors areas. Well, that explains the Medichamite XD AND VULPIX. DARLING. Oh my goodness.

And we’re at the top. I see... at least three grunts on the path up, and Archie and Matt at the top. BATTLE TIME.

First grunt has a level 36 Grimer. Sage wrecks it.

Next grunt, leads with Carvanha, level 33. Discharge OHKO! Next is Mightyena, level 35, and that’s Chickweed’s!

Last grunt, leads with Mightyena, level 34. Over to Chickweed! Huh, I wonder if Blazikenite counts as an item for the purpose of Embargo? ...nope. No kill like overkill :’) Next is Golbat, level 34, back to Oleracea for a Discharge OHKO!

Nice.

Archie is heading for Slateport, and I have a fight with Matt! He only has his level 38 Sharpedo, and I have a level 41 Manectric ;D

Red Orb acquired. With my handy dandy Fly, we’re off to Slateport!

“We’re taking your submarine!” “Oh dear where did that voice come from?!” Check your submarine?

Aaand no more submarine. Oops. Will dash back to Lilycove as soon as I take care of these boring ol’ grunts! First one has a Mightyena, level 36, that’s Chickweed’s.

Next grunt leads with Carvanha, level 34. Oleracea takes it out! Next is Golbat, level 34. Fuck it, Oleracea can take this one, too!

Nice, a free trip to Lilycove. A brief explore of the town - apparently an Aqua grunt has 101 Skitty at their parents’ place, and a lovey-dovey couple roleplay as... Lisia and her Altaria... as one does.

Here seems to be a good place to stop!

Current Team

Chickweed the Blaziken | level 48 | male | Blaze | Serious, takes plenty of siestas | Flame Charge, Blaze Kick, Double Kick, Cut | starter

Snowdrop the Mightyena | level 46 | female | Intimidate | Lonely, loves to eat | Ice Fang, Crunch, Odor Sleuth, Rock Smash | found route 101

Sage the Claydol | level 42 | no thank you | Levitate | Bold, sturdy body | Earth Power, Extrasensory, Ancient Power, Dazzling Gleam | found route 111 

Oleracea the Manectric | level 41 | female | Static | Brave, capable of taking hits | Discharge, Volt Switch, Thunder Wave, Bite | found route 118

Sequoia the Gyarados | level 40 | female | Intimidate | Bashful, nods off a lot | Surf, Ice Fang, Bite, Dragon Rage | found route 106

Edelweiss the Skarmory | level 39 | male | Sturdy | Gentle, very finicky | Assurance, Steel Wing, Fly, Swift | found route 113

Reserves

Wattle the Taillow | level 9 | female | Guts | Quirky, alert to sounds | Peck, Growl, Focus Energy, Quick Attack | found Petalburg Woods

Bristlecone the Zigzagoon | level 14 | female | Gluttony | Lonely, good endurance | Tackle, Headbutt, Baby-Doll Eyes, Odor Sleuth | found route 103

Onion the Whismur | level 16 | female | Soundproof | Adamant, likes to relax | Pound, Echoed Voice, Astonish, Howl | found Rusturf Tunnel

Poison Ivy the Tentacool | level 5 | male | Liquid Ooze | Sassy, capable of taking hits | Poison Sting, Supersonic | found Dewford Town

Euphorbia the Makuhita | level 12 | male | Thick Fat | Hardy, capable of taking hits | Focus Energy, Sand Attack, Arm Thrust, Fake Out | found Granite Cave

Lithops the Numel | level 14 | female | Simple | Quiet, likes to run | Tackle, Ember, Focus Energy, Magnitude | found route 112

Rauvolfia the Seviper | level 19 | male | Shed Skin | Careful, impetuous and silly | Poison Tail, Screech, Venoshock, Glare | found route 114

Moraea the Spoink | level 23 | female | Own Tempo |  Quirky, quick tempered | Psybeam, Psych Up, Confuse Ray, Magic Coat | found Jagged Pass

Agapanthus the Pelipper | level 33 | male | Keen Eye | Modest, a little quick-tempered | Water Pulse, Wing Attack, Steel Wing, Quick Attack | found route 104

Rosemary the Latias | level 30 | female | Levitate | Sassy, somewhat vain | Heal Pulse, Dragon Breath, Mist Ball, Psycho Shift | found Southern Island

Milkweed the Beautifly | level 26 | female | Swarm | Lax, somewhat stubborn | Air Cutter, Mega Drain, Silver Wind, Morning Sun | found route 102

Hydrangea the Kecleon | level 25 | male | Color Change | Lonely, often lost in thought | Feint Attack, Psybeam, Ancient Power, Slash | found route 119

Sunflower the Castform | level 30 | female | Forecast | Lax, mischievous Rain Dance, Sunny Day, Hail, Weather Ball | found Weather Institute

Banana the Tropius | level 27 | male | Solar Power | Brave, a little quick tempered | Stomp, Magical Leaf, Whirlwind, Leaf Tornado | found route 120

Uniflora the Shuppet | level 28 | female | Insomnia | Mild, alert to sounds | Will-O-Wisp, Feint Attack, Hex, Curse | found route 121

Monotropa the Duskull | level 28 | female | Levitate | Naughty, loves to eat | Foresight, Shadow Sneak, Pursuit, Will-O-Wisp | found Mt Pyre

Dead

Catnip the Skitty, found route 116, killed by Lass Janice’s Marill in route 116

Daisy the Pikachu, found Slateport City, killed by Archie’s Sharpedo at Mount Chimney