#the competition for Leighton's heart

[andydrysdalerogers]

Cross-Checked ~ Chapter Ten

Andy Barber x OFC Leighton "Leia" Andrews

Summary:

Andy Barber is having the best year of his life. His game is on point. It’s gets to play with his best friend and his fiancé just... dumped him?!. 

Reeling from a sudden change in status, Andy decides it’s time to just focus on hockey. Until his best friend's sister comes out with news that rock the entire organizations world., 

Andy has always carried a torch for the untouchable Leighton but in her hour of need, is now the time to shoot and score or risk getting cross - checked again? 

Warnings: Cheating (but not by the MCs); slow burn; friends to lovers eventually; SMUT!; pregnancy; jealousy; handsome goalies, evil exes...

A/N: The tag list is open!

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Previous: Chapter Nine ~ It's Complicated ~ Jeremy/Leia

Series Masterlist // Main Masterlist

Chapter Ten ~ He Had It Coming ~ Andy

Andy 

Sitting at home alone was now just pathetic.  

I missed Leia so much. My words hurt her, hurt her so badly that I could see it the moment it happened. I had never spoken to her like that ever. The look on her face will haunt me forever. Why? Why would I talk to her like that? I know that Swayman is making her happy and I should want that for her. But he’s also not a good guy and I just didn’t want to see her get hurt.  

But now she’s not speaking to me, and I only see her in glances at practice or during a game. She’s been avoiding me as much as possible, though I don’t blame her. Luke has been pestering me about why she’s been in a mood but fuck that. I’m not telling him.  He would literally kill me for making his sister cry.  

So now I find myself alone in the big, Leia-less house, wishing I had done things differently. I miss my best friend.  I had just shut off all the lights and was heading for my room when there was a knock at the door. God, I hope it wasn’t Luke.  If he was having trouble with Miranda, I don’t know what my reaction would be. I groan and head back down the stairs. I don’t check out the window and just open the door.  

But I’m surprised to what I found.  

“Hi.”  

The most beautiful sight is in front of me. Leia. “Princess? You lose your key?” 

She’s playing with her fingers. Oh shit. That is her tell. “No,” she says quietly. “But I didn’t want to just walk in when I have been such a brat with you. I’m sorry.”  

I watch the tears fill her eyes and her bottom lip quiver. “Leia, I’m the one who should be sorry.” I pull her into my arms, and she begins to cry. “Princess, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that. I should have been your best friend and supported you and I’m just... sorry.”  

I walked us into the house, and I sat her down on the couch. She hiccups a little and I go grab her a water. “Thanks,” she whispers. I can see that she’s been upset for a while.  

“Leia, are you ok?” 

She shakes her head. “No. Just a lot of things, I guess.” She drops a hand to her belly and that’s when I noticed. She’s showing.  

“I’m sorry sweetheart.”  

A flash of heartbreak crossed her beautiful eyes. “Don’t call me that. Just call me Princess, ok?” 

“Ok.  So, my Princess has her belly now, huh?” I smile as I reach out my hand, wanting to distract her. “May I?” 

She gives a small smile.  “Yeah. I don’t feel them yet, but it feels weird.”  

I touch her belly with reverence. She's growing a life in there and soon, we’ll know what it is. “Hello, little one.” I sit there, hoping to feel something but all I feel is a tremble. I look up to see tears streaming down my Leia’s face. “Leia?” 

“He told me he would be there. That he cared.” She took a shuddering breath. “Umm... Jeremy and I are no longer seeing each other.  Apparently, I was wrong that he wanted a relationship with me.” The last words came out in a sob as she leaned forward into my chest. “He slept with someone else and told me that he couldn’t be a father and that I was ruining his reputation. I wasn’t worth it,” she cries, and I held her tight to me.  

I am raging. I am seeing red. I knew this fucker would hurt her and yet, he did so much worst.  

He broke her. 

I rock her as she cries, running my hands over her back and just letting her cry. I’m dreaming of the different ways I will be detaching Swayman’s head from his body. He knew the risks of seeing Leia and he was still his cocky asshole self in the end. As I feel her calm, I press my lips to her head. “I’ve got you Princess, I’ve always got you.”  

“Why won’t they love me, Andy? What did I do for them to hate me?” She thinks it's her. That the choices of these douchebags not choosing her at the end is her fault.  

“They don’t see the best parts of you, Leia. If they don’t see it, they don’t deserve you. You are a strong, independent, kick-ass social media manger, businesswoman, sister, daughter and friend.  And one day, someone will see all of it and not be stupid and make you theirs.” I cup her cheek, so she looks at me. “You deserve to be treated like a queen. Don’t settle for less.”  

A small smile graces her beautiful lips. “Thank you, Andy.” She wiped her cheeks. “I’m going to concentrate on my baby and my business. I don’t need a man to do those things. I just need you and Luke and Stella and Miranda and I don’t need anyone else.”  

I gave her a smile, even though it hurt a little. She still needed me but not as a lover. But it’s ok, because as long as I have her in my life, I don’t need anything else.  “C’mon, Warrior Princess, let’s get a snack and then its bedtime.” I got up and gave her my hand.  

“Can you stay with me until I fall asleep?” She turned those big green eyes on me, and I’m doomed.  

“Anytime you want Princess.”  

She’s back and she’s talking to me again. It's a win. I’ll take it and tomorrow I’ll deal with the raging heat that’s simmering below.  

Leia woke up and made breakfast and it's like she never left.  She’s quiet but not as despondent as she was last night. “You ok, Princess?” 

“No, but I will be,” she said as she speared a piece of fruit.  

I sighed.  “You have an appointment coming up. Is it an ultrasound? Do you still want me to go?” 

This perks her up a bit. “Yeah, they might be able to tell what the baby is.”  

“Have a preference?” I took a sip of coffee with a smile.  I loved her excitement when it came to the baby.  

“No, healthy is good.  I just want to plan the room and names and stuff.” She looked down at her phone and let out a soft curse. “I’m sorry Andy, I totally forgot I have a meeting with a potential new client. It's a finance company, so new challenge.” 

“Go, I’ll clean up here. I have practice and a meeting with my agent but after, wanna grab a late lunch?” 

“Sure!” She ran out of the room and up the stairs. 

I grimaced but was happy she wouldn’t be at practice. I had a goalie to confront.  

As team captain, I have to set an example to the rest of the team. I fight for them on the ice with the refs and I am their shoulder to lean on off the ice. I take this very seriously. I will protect all of my team, from the players, to the trainers and our support staff.  I want to be that person my team relies on.  

Today, however, I think I might become the one they fear.  

I had told Coach that I was running late because of an appointment with Leia. I needed to take a moment to remind myself that murder is bad. But blowing up Swayman’s world would be a nice consolation prize.  

Everyone was already on the ice, shooting the breeze while Coach got prepared.  I stretched and dressed. Luke was waiting for me at the end of the hallway. “Everything good, bro?” 

“Everything is fine,” I growl out.  I grabbed my twig and start skating around.  Luke pulls up next to me.  

“Andy, what is it?” I keep skating, not wanting to lose it on my best friend. He’s going to be pissed. I keep my head down just as I pass the net when I hear, “yeah, she was banging.”  

Swayman. 

I come to a complete stop and look at him.  “Who was banging?” 

Jeremy has a flash of uncertainty cross in his eyes before he smiles again.  “This chick I hooked up with. She was wild in the sack last night.”  

“Oh,” I kept my face neutral. “This is after you dumped Leia and after you cheated on her, right? Nice.”  

I swear every single skate stopped to stare at the standoff between me and Swayman.  I actually think I managed to shut Luke up the longest.  

“Leia and I weren't a couple. We dated but we weren’t exclusive,” Jeremy defended himself.  

“Oh, so telling her that you would be there for her, be with her for the baby, acting like her boyfriend but really what was your motive? Screw her and then dump her? She is one of us!” A collective intake of breath happens.  

“Jeremy, tell me that isn’t true?” Linus Ullmark says.  

“It's not only true but I had Leia sobbing all night because of this asshat,” pointing at Swayman. 

“Why the fuck do you care, Barber? I had bigger balls than you to ask her out and date her. She was asking to be fucked, acting like a slut.  She was ready to give me everything and then she dropped the truth bomb that she’s pregnant! She is a whore, wanting to sleep with someone else when she has a baby daddy. At least I didn’t fuck her, you should be thankful for that. You won’t have to deal with my sloppy seconds. Or thirds, I guess,” he said with a smirk.  

I tried to lunge at him, but a couple of the guys stopped me.  

No one saw Luke.  

He put everything into that punch. Jeremy dropped to the ice as more guys work to stop Luke from pummeling his ass into the ground. “You fucking asshole!  That’s my baby sister you are messing with!” Luke screams. He’s thrashing in the arms of our defensemen while Linus is helping Jeremy up. Swayman’s got a bloody nose and a split lip.   

“Fuck you, Andrews.  You told me I could go for it. Blame your-fucking-self!” He tries to go for Luke but Ullmark and my other assistant captain, Marchand, hold him back.  

“That’s enough!” The coach walks over to us. “Swayman, go to the trainer's room and get cleaned up.  Andrews,” he looks him up and down, “meet me in my office after practice. Barber, you too.”  

Like I said, I’ll do anything to protect my team. But not when a teammate is a detriment to the rest of us.  

Coach is furious when we walk into his office after practice. Jeremy never made it back to practice and I worry that Luke is about to be suspended for it. He’s holding an ice pack to his knuckles; they’re already turning black and blue.  Coach looks at us and then at the chairs in front of his desk. We take that as the order to sit and do it. “I don’t even know what to say.” He glares at us. I think he is trying to dare us into speaking, but I am no fool. Doing that would be suicide.  

The door opens and one of the trainers pokes his head in. “Sorry coach, you wanted to know...” 

“Yeah?” Coach continues to glare at us.  

“It’s not broken but bruised pretty good. At least one,” doc said.  

“Thanks.” The trainer closed the door and Coach sighed. “You two are both very lucky. Because I was about to bench your asses for however long he would be out.”  

Luke starts, “but Coach...” I grab his arm and shake my head.  

“I want a reason why my captains are fighting with their goalie. Barber, this is your team and you’re starting fights?” 

“Sir, I didn’t start the fight.  I started an argument,” I replied in a steady tone. “Whether or not I was ready to throw down is up for debate.” I keep my eyes with his.  

“I want to know the reason,” he seethes.  

I look at Luke, who nods.  I sigh. “Swayman made a couple of comments about Andrews’s sister. I took offense to them because she is one of my best friends.  He then made a derogatory remark about her. That’s when my teammates stopped me but neglected to account for Luke.” 

“Derogatory how?”  

I forgot that Coach has daughters. “I’d rather not repeat it.  You can ask him if you’d like to, but I refuse to say it.”  

Coach sighs and sits down. This feels like sixth grade all over again when Luke and I got hauled to the principal’s office for fighting. I mean, Tommy Deroux had it coming after pushing Leia to the ground in the playground. The suspension was worth it when he had to apologize to her in front of the whole school. “I really don’t know how to handle this. I get it, she’s your sister, but they are also adults, and they made their choices.” 

“Sir, you didn’t have your sister or best friend sobbing in your arms last night.  It took everything to come in and not start something right away. I was going to let it go because you’re right.  They made this decision to date together.  But I protect everyone on this team, whether their job is on the ice or not.  I will not let the disrespect that happened to another employee go unaddressed.” 

Coach looks at me warily. Then at Luke.  “One game, Andrews. You sit for one game for throwing the punch.  What happens outside of my arena is not my problem.  Now get out of my office.”  

I stood up with Luke and went back to the locker room. We grab our stuff to change since we just dressed in sweats after we showered. “One fucking game,” Luke says.  

“You’re lucky it's not more.” I pulled on my hoodie. “There was a reason I didn’t say anything before practice.” I grabbed my wallet and keys. “She was heartbroken last night.”  

“But that’s my sister, man.”  

“And I have to think about what’s best for the team. You got your hit in, let it go.” I turned around and felt my balls retreat into my body. Luke turned at my silence and froze.  

Leia glared at us. “Wanna explain to me why Marchand is calling me and letting me know that my brother threw a punch at practice?” 

Oh shit. 

Can I just comment here that Leia has her mom look down? 

“Princess...” she raised her hand up to stop me and never took her eyes off of Luke.  I feared for my best friend, and I took a step back.  

“Lucas Michael Andrews, what the fuck are you thinking?” 

“Cubby, listen...” he looked at me but I looked down. He sighed. “Swayman crossed the line at practice, and you can’t expect me to not defend your honor.”  

Leia had a horrified look on her face. “What was he saying?”  

I jump in. “Nothing Princess. It's been handled and I want you to put it out of your mind, ok?” I pulled her into my arms for a hug. “I promise, it's been handled, and Coach gave the punishments and life here will go back to normal.”  

Whatever that looks like.  

NEXT

Taglist:

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[mariejordans]

4, 5, and 6 of the character ask questions for Jordan Li and Marie Moreau please 👀

oh i’m so excited to answer these questions! thank you for sending them in!

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

i feel like the obvious answer for marie would be avatar: the last airbender, because, hello, bloodbending…and because i love the atla universe so much, i’m going with the obvious answer. but, if i wanted to pick something completely unrelated to her powers, i think i’d the show sex lives of college girls would be perfect for her! i think she’d get along great with the core four, especially leighton and whitney, plus i just think marie’s character just kinda fits the vibe of the show.

as for jordan, literally the first thing i thought of was encanto 😭 and at first i was like, this is such an unserious answer, but i think it’s hilarious to think about jordan’s grumpy ass being in an actual disney movie. for a more serious answer for jordan, i would actually love to see them in agents of shield. i could definitely see jordan as one of the inhumans and i also think they’d do well as an agent of shield. also i just want to see them interact with daisy, i love her so much.

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

okay, i watch a lot of edits of them on twitter so i lot of the songs i associate with marie and jordan are songs from the edits, so these might be a bit unserious 😭

for marie, the first song that comes to mind is anxiety by megan thee stallion. it was the first song that played when marie was introduced to us, so now that song is literally marie’s in my mind. like i’ll only ever think of marie now when i listen to that song.

as for jordan, the first song i think of when i think of jordan is like a boy by ciara. one of my favorite jordan edits used this song and now it’s just engrained in my mind when i think of them.

(also, bonus answer: the first song i think of when i think of limoreau is the louvre by lorde, it’s just so them to me…)

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

marie and i are both older sisters (i have two younger sisters and she has one), and while our situations are nowhere near the same, i really understand where her desire to find her sister comes from. my sisters are some of my best friends, it would completely break my heart if my sisters decided to completely cut me off the way marie did with annabeth.

as for jordan, we are both bisexual! and we’re both super competitive. i make jokes about it, but i know that if i was ever in a top ten situation, and i knew i was being robbed of my rightful ranking, i would also be bitching about it constantly. we’re both kinda sore losers too if you think about it 😭

[inkyquince]

I love love LOVE your writing, Headmaster's lession was the best thing to come out of the fandom ngl

It did make me want more of River x Leighton though, could you maybe do a scene where he bosses River around again on pc? A threeway? Maybe after the math competition 👉👈

content warning. Filming, anal, coercion, threesome, pretty perverted ngl, oral, thoughts about face sitting, nasty love hotel, Leighton being in charge of the scene.

Headmaster Lesson

Aftermath

The ancient phone on the nightstand buzzed once again, rattling against the glass and nudging the other phones lined up next to it. River knew it was the workers at the Soup Kitchen asking where he was, if he was going to be late but tore his eyes from the device, still vibrating as a call tried to come through. He wasn't going to be able to reply for a while, Leighton making sure everyone put their devices on the side table to "Not be distracted". His stomach flipped. What would the others think, what would Jordan think if they found out he was shirking his duties, duties to the temple and to the good of the town, for something as perverse as this? Something so immoral, so filthy, so wrong, so right as this?

His guilt didn't waver, especially since it felt... So dirty. Distant sounds of doors opening and closing outside the room, moans, vague shouting matches. Window open a fraction to let some measly air circulation to combat against the damp heat, blinds open just a fraction so the slits shed some light on the love hotel's room. River didn't even know this town had such a hotel, but of course Leighton would have easily sniffed it out. He felt sweat run down his spine, palms clammy as he gripped the cheap sheets, preferring to grab them instead of touching the squirming body underneath, despite being inside their... Their... Their....

"Earth to River." The smug voice of his boss shook himself out of his reverie. "Rude to not be fully present for your favorite student, especially after winning your competition."

"Sorry, sir." River's mouth felt dry. Calling Leighton that now felt so filthy now.

Leighton hummed, sitting in the cheap chair by the bed, tugging leisurely on his cock, head wet and red. The fan's whirring was accompanied only by the sound of the camera, little red eye trained on the scene playing out in front of it. More distracting than all of it, the filth, the camera, the headmaster, was you.

Moving back against him as his cock sluggishly pressed into you, the sick, sloppy sounds of skin against skin, but unlike your teacher, whose conscious was at war, you seemed to be in heaven. Chest heaving and hazy eyes, with your legs wrapped securely around River's hips. He felt a small twinge in his heart. Too young, too attractive, too magnetic.

It did bring up a nagging thought, one that made him fairly sick. Would he have given in so quickly to Leighton's demands if it had been any of his other students?

Thankfully Leighton's twisted thoughts seemed to extend to only you when it came to torturing River. Though he did once bring up seeing how much Whitney would have to be paid to bend his Maths teacher over. Hopefully it was just a threat.

"Where do you keep going?" Leighton's lips against his ear made River shiver, jerking once again out of his head. Suddenly all the details he tried to block out before came into sharp focus. The warmth of the sun through the slits, the fan and the camera, the crinkle of the sheets, your hole sucking him back in with every thrust, Leighton hovering just behind him, erect cock brushing against River's thigh, leaving a trail of pre-cum.

"You're being very rude to our little winner. Pull out." Leighton continued, lips curving into a smile, wicked teeth flashing.

River fought back a protest. He wasn't supposed to object to pulling out of you, to complain about having to stop molesting you with his hard cock. He ground his teeth and slowly slipped out of you, weeping cockhead leaving strands of opaque white as he shifted away. Your soft fussing hiccup made him want to press back in, but Leighton's hand came up to squeeze your thigh in warning. It was of course unneeded, what could you do, utterly naked except a partially open school shirt on, against two grown men, aroused and bare.

Instead, Leighton cupped River's neck in his other hand, thumb, streaked with precum from jerking off, stroked against his sweaty skin.

"You've been awfully rude. Apologize to them."

River blinked and open and shut his mouth before looking back down at you, somewhat sheepishly.

"I'm sorry." He murmured, gaze dropping from your eyes to your hole again, swollen from being bullied by cocks and fingers.

"Not like that. Make it up to them, eat them out." Leighton's breath got quicker, obviously into the thought.

River exhaled shakily and ran a shaking finger over your genitals, the feeling of your flesh dizzying. Just as he started to lower himself, tongue pooling with saliva at the thought of tasting you again, Leighton morphed his easy touch into a tight grip, stopping him.

"Come now River, you've never been this obtuse before. They deserve a treat for your neglectful treatment of them. Show some love to to that other hole we like so much, hm?"

River's stomach flipped. Leighton had a clear fondness for playing with your ass, ever since day one. Fingering it, spitting on it before trailing the tip of his tongue over the rim, even sinking into it as you were made to worship River's cock. He was a tad more squeamish, somehow more so than normal, but...

You shifted lazily, twisting so you lay on your stomach, settling your face into the pillows before peeking at River over your shoulder, letting your legs sway in the air. The Maths teacher gulped softly before settling down, his cockhead brushing against the tacky sheets uncomfortable, until he too was on his stomach, resting your thighs against his shoulders. His upper arms rested either side of your ass, with his hands shyly trailing over your back before resting them.

Another squeeze from Leighton had him press his face in-between your cheeks, tongue trailing over your rim. He expected... Not this. Not those strange hazy that fell over him, like his brain was sinking below the surface of a cool, calm pond, suspending his doubts as if they were still above water.

Leighton made himself comfortable at the head of the bed, sitting by the pillow you had buried your face into, pleasantly surprise by the enthusiasm River showed as soon as he got into it. Face buried into you ass, eyes closed and face only moving to press itself deeper, his tongue obviously making you shiver and shake. Your own eyes were fluttering, moans loud and clear despite the half hearted muffling. Leighton resumed stroking his cock, but having edged himself as long as he could, just by watching River be pressured to fuck into you, having to admit to himself that he truly was not above Leighton morally, just as a sick old fuck, he was growing tired of his lubed up palm. Instead he tapped your cheek, making your eyes drift over to him, not his face, but fixed on his erect cock. Of course, he trained you to be such a cock drunk little whore at this point.

You obediently opened your mouth so he could ease his cock into your welcoming mouth before closing your lips around him with a happy sigh. Tongue already tracing his slit for any precum the formed before dragging the broad of it over his length. Leighton closed his eyes and leaned his head back, feeling your hot mouth try to swallow more of him down, treasuring the salty taste of his cock as you did so.

Truly, he never expected such a good outcome. Two perverted messes whose attempts of trying to wriggle out of his ideas were weak at best. As much of a fight you and River always put up at first, claiming to not be as depraved as the headmaster, you two sure did become truly perverted by the time fingers had been sunk into the two of you.

Truly, Leighton mused as your mouth popped off his cock and eagerly lapped at his balls, sucking and licking, the more he had these little training sessions, the more eager for this crude pleasure you two became.

The headmaster gave a pleased sigh and stroked along your cheek, your nose nudging the base of his cock as you continued to appreciate his aching balls. As much as he loved the attention, he was right about to hit his limit. Unlike River, who he liked to wring orgasm after orgasm out of, he wanted to treasure where and when he dumped his cum into one of you.

So, as he gripped your chin and eased you off of him, finding your whine cute, he settled on his final orgasm of the night.

After all, it had been a while since he has River suck him off while you sat on his face. He'll also let you two work out your individual orgasms with each other while he takes a shower later, camera still running of course. Leighton would still want to see every little dirty detail later.

[cathygeha]

REVIEW

One Wedding and an Early by Tracy Sumner

The Duchess Society #4

 Sigh…what a wonderful story to sweep me into the past and spend the day. Love this series and enjoy returning to the Leighton Cluster as it grows with the addition of more couples and their offspring.

 What I liked:

* Josephine Byrne – known as Necessity and at one time Josie: orphaned young, made her way on her own, superb gardener, has dreams and aspiration, knowledgeable, forthright, strong, assertive, competitive, rather taken with Ollie

* Oliver Apinwall, Earl of Stanford – close friends and family call him Ollie: difficult backstory, ex-military, has dealt with addiction, half brother to Xander Macauley, scarred, reclusive, keeps emotions close, stargazer, rather taken with Necessity

* The way Necessity and Oliver originally meet

* The way Xander plays matchmaker by sending Necessity to fix Oliver’s gardens on his estate

* Watching the relationship develop and the dance of emotions and communication difficulties that Oliver and Necessity must negotiate

* That Necessity is not afraid to state what she wants

* The close relationship, love, and support that exists within The Leighton Cluster

* Getting to see the characters from previous books in the series

* The conclusion

* Wanting to read the next story with Dash and Theo while wondering if Jasper Noble will get a story of his own, too

 What I didn’t like:

* Who and what I was meant not to like – especially Oliver’s father

* Thinking about poverty, disease, and class issues prevalent in this era

 Did I enjoy this book? Yes

Would I read more in this series? Definitely

 Thank you to the author and Wolf Publishing for the ARC – This is my honest review

 5 Stars

      BLURB

 In this sizzling Regency romance by USA Today bestselling author Tracy Sumner, a notorious earl and an infamous hellion need to face an unforgettable passion.

 A scarred earl with a big heart—and a big problem.

 Since his return from war, the Earl of Stanford’s life has been anything but simple. A meddling older brother, a raucous group of friends, a crumbling estate, and an injury that forever changed him. Now this. Her. His brother’s bright idea of a way out. The most infamous landscape architect in England arriving on his doorstep to restore his ruined gardens and his ruined heart. Only, Ollie Aspinwall isn’t falling for this sibling ploy.

 He’s content to hide in the country, a brooding, stargazing, lost soul.

 A gorgeous hellion with wild dreams—and a wild challenge. Necessity Byrne has heard the rumors about the Scarred Earl. A walking scandal, she’s used to flouting convention and shocking society, so the offer to assist a reclusive peer with beautification of his estate is a project she’d consider. Except for the ripple of awareness that dances along her skin every time she recalls meeting the handsome, steely eyed rake years ago. A dilemma she doesn’t care to solve—even if she wants the job.

 However, she’s a woman determined to take every dare offered her.

 So, they agree to disagree for the sake of the earldom’s gardens, all the while battling a breathless, rampant attraction—until Ollie decides he wants to keep her. Can he persuade his feisty, adorable gardener to accept a besotted, broken-down earl with dreams of a family and love?

 Come along on this sizzling slow burn, enemies-to-lovers, sorta second chance romp!

The Duchess Society Series #1 The Brazen Bluestocking #2 The Scandalous Vixen #3 The Wicked Wallflower #4 One Wedding and an Earl More to follow! Prequel: The Ice Duchess Christmas novella: The Governess Gamble

[coochiequeens]

Since mainstream media won’t actually cover missing women of color let’s start a thread to raise awareness

On the day after Christmas in 2009, Viola Martin went to visit one of her daughters, who had just been released from the hospital. She never arrived and has not been seen since.

More than a decade later, her family is still desperately trying to find Martin, who was 56 and last seen in south suburban Glenwood when she went missing.

“It has been the hardest 11 years that my sisters, my family, have had to face,” said her daughter, Angela Martin Fields.

The family has renewed hope in the form of a new project launched by the Cook County sheriff’s office that will focus on unsolved disappearances in Cook County. During a news conference Wednesday, Sheriff Tom Dart announced the county’s Missing Persons Project, which he said will investigate Martin’s case and dozens of others.

The sheriff’s office will assign three detectives to work solely on missing persons cases in Chicago and the suburbs, focusing primarily on women due to the “particular vulnerability that women have when they are missing,” Dart said. The project will look at people who have been missing long-term, which they define as three or more years. Dart said technological advances in the ensuing years may help detectives breathe new life into old cases.

“Our goal is to help ... families who have had their hearts torn out,” Dart said. “Our hope is that some of these cases, we are going to resolve so family will finally have the resolution they never had.”

The project has outlined 170 missing persons cases going back to 1930 that detectives will give fresh eyes to and offer resources that local law enforcement agencies may not be able to devote to the cold cases. It also established a website with information about the missing people. Dart asked community members to look at the site and send in tips if they have information about any of the cases.

To identify the 170 missing persons — 77 women and 93 men — the sheriff’s office used a national database and cross referenced it with local law enforcement databases.

Family members of Viola Martin attended the news conference wearing T-shirts with photographs of her. They cried and hugged each other when it concluded.

Angela Martin Fields said her mother was kind and caring, and has great-grandchildren she hasn’t met. In 2009, she was working at a medical facility, but never picked up her last paycheck, according to the sheriff’s office.

Though her mother had a drug problem, Fields said she had been clean for five years.

On Dec. 26, 2009, the day she disappeared, Viola Martin was at Fields’ home in Glenwood when she left to visit her other daughter, who lived about 20 minutes away. The family had spent Christmas together, and Martin didn’t want her children to leave, the Tribune reported at the time.

After searching for her themselves, the Martin family reported her missing Dec. 29.

The next day, investigators found Martin’s tan, 1999 Chrysler Cirrus parked illegally on a street in Dixmoor, which was not near her daughter’s home.

At the time of the disappearance, Fields was a contestant on “American Idol,” a popular television musical competition. The show made an exception to its rules about keeping contestants sequestered to allow Fields to talk to reporters about her mother.

People have reported sightings of Martin over the years, police and family members said. Fields said she and her sisters drop everything to follow up each time they hear such reports, but none have panned out.

“It’s time for us to find her, and it’s time for us to bring her home,” Fields said.

Among other cases the detectives are investigating as part of the project is the disappearance of Tracie Bell, last seen on March 6, 2018. That day, police officers were called to Bell’s Richton Park condo after she didn’t show up to her work as a secretary for the Cook County state’s attorney at the Leighton Criminal Court Building.

Officers spoke to Bell, then 54, who was cooperative and appeared to be in a healthy state of mind, according to the police.

But when she didn’t report to work again the following day, police officers returned to the condo and found no one there, though her vehicle was still parked at the building.

[miracleonice87]

25&28 w tkachuk (if not taken)

25. spending time with family / 28. “Where’s all of your holiday spirit, you Scrooge?”

quick note: happy birthday, Matthew 💕 decided to use an OC for this one as it fit a little bit better. enjoy!

quick warning: just alcohol I believe. suuuper fluff. 

song pairing, just for fun: It’s Not Christmas ‘Til You Come Home by Norah Jones (for a sad, mopey, brooding Matty)

_____

“Where’s all of your holiday spirit, you Scrooge?” Keith bellowed, nudging Matthew’s arm with the same hand that held his vodka tonic. The matching drink he poured for Matthew still sat in front of his son on the kitchen island, untouched. That’s how Keith knew his son was really struggling.

“I prefer Grinch,” Matthew grumbled, resting his chin on his fist. “And my holiday spirit left with Leighton.”

Taryn clicked her tongue in pity from the barstool next to him and stood to wrap her arms around her brother’s shoulders. “I know you miss her,” she said as she squeezed him tight. “We miss her, too.”

Matthew attempted a smile and patted his sister’s forearm appreciatively. Brady, on the other hand, took less sensitive approach.

“Yeah, plus you’re way more fun when she’s here,” Brady pointed out, pouring himself another drink.

Matthew rolled his eyes. “Thank you,” he murmured sarcastically, followed by a lengthy sigh. “I just don’t know why she had to be the one to travel so far for this game. I wish somebody else could have.”

“Because it’s a big bowl game, Matthew,” Keith stated in a matter-of-fact tone. “And we all know she’s the best at what she does. It’s Christmas Day. There’s gonna be a lot of eyeballs watching this afternoon. You should be proud. And understanding. She works in sports and you’re a pro athlete. Of anybody, you should get it.”

Matthew dropped his head back in dramatic fashion. As much as he hated to admit it, his dad was right. He absolutely loved that his girlfriend worked as a sideline reporter for college football — they understood each others’ insane work schedules and had a special bond over their passion for sports of all kinds. He loved listening to Leighton’s reporting because she was a hell of a lot smarter than he was, and also a lot smarter than most other reporters… plus, the fact that she was an complete smokeshow, and all his, was the cherry on top.

But her job stealing her away from him at Christmas just wasn’t fair.

“Speaking of which, her game is starting soon,” Taryn said, glancing at the oven clock. She clapped Matthew’s back and ordered, “Come on, let’s go.” Taryn led the way into the living room as each family member found a seat in front of the TV.

As if Matthew could have ever forgotten, Leighton was working a bowl game in Phoenix. He had initially tried to force his way into joining her on her trip, but she refused to allow him to spend Christmas Day alone in a hotel room or waiting for her somewhere squeezed into the sold out stadium. She insisted on Matthew’s going home to spend the holidays with his family, who barely got to see him at all during the NHL season. Though they’d promised to have their own Christmas when they both returned to Calgary late on Boxing Day, they were both brokenhearted at the prospect of spending their first major holiday apart.

“It just won’t be Christmas without you, Leight,” Matthew sighed as he leaned his forehead against hers during their final goodbye at the airport.

She took a deep breath and tried to hold herself together at his statement, her fingers smoothing the short hair at the nape of his neck. When she looked back into his face, her eyes shone with tears.

“I’m sorry,” Leighton whispered, not trusting her voice to carry her words. Matthew shook his head.

“Don’t be sorry, baby,” he whispered, pressing his lips to the space between her brows. “I’m just gonna miss you is all.” Leighton squeezed his neck tighter, and after one last searing kiss, she pulled back with a sniffle.

“I’m gonna miss you too,” she told him. “Like always.” She reached for the handle of her rolling suitcase beside her and said, “I really have to go.” Matthew nodded.

“Okay. Be safe,” he said quietly, pulling her into his chest once more. “I love you, Leight. Merry Christmas.”

He felt her choke on a sob before she whispered, “Merry Christmas, Matty. I love you so much.”

And with that, she threw him a tight smile with red, watery eyes and forced her feet to carry her inside to the check-in counter, before she gave in and jumped back into Matthew’s car and returned home with him, like every muscle in her body was screaming at her to do.

Though he smiled when Leighton first appeared onscreen, looking even more beautiful than usual, Matthew then immediately replayed the memory of their crushing goodbye a few days prior, and his face fell once more. His mom, seated next to him, took notice, and wrapped her hand around his, smoothing the other over his cheek with a sad smile. He squeezed her fingers and gave a halfhearted smile of his own.

Michigan edged out a win over Florida after an ultra-competitive game, which Matthew couldn’t even enjoy because his heart ached each time Leighton was shown on the sideline. He sighed after each report she gave, and by the end of the game, when it was time for dinner, he had given into the drinks Keith was offering and was now well into the process of drowning his sorrows.

He did his best to contribute to the conversation at the dinner table, but after the plates were cleared and they returned to the living room to play board games and watch Christmas movies, Matthew fell quiet once more. No one called him out for it — they felt the weight of Leighton’s absence, too. She had become an integral part of the Tkachuk family dynamic, and not having her there just felt wrong.

By the time it was nearing midnight, Matthew was lying motionless on the couch, watching Home Alone but not laughing at any of the parts that made him chuckle each time it was on. He was just about to force himself upright to pour one last cocktail for the night when there was a knock at the door.

Everyone fell silent.

Brady and Taryn looked at each other at the same time, and Taryn whispered, “No way…”

Matthew looked to his parents, cuddled together on the couch across the room. Chantal appeared just as surprised as her children did, but Keith’s eyes had a distinct glimmer in them. He gave half a shrug and said from behind his glass, “Well, why don’t you go answer it?”

It couldn’t be. No. It wasn’t. Was it? There was no way. Taryn was right. No way.

Halfway through a second knock, Matthew swung open the door to find a certain sports reporter on his doorstep, still dressed in the same ensemble she had worn on the sideline, covered with a pea coat and a Flames beanie.

A breathy chuckle escaped through her smiling lips and rose through the air as a puff of white steam.

“Hi, Matty,” Leighton said simply.

For a moment, Matthew was completely and utterly frozen in place, convinced his mind was playing tricks on him. When he blinked and realized that his girlfriend was still standing before him, that she was truly here in St. Louis, he lunged toward her and buried his face in her neck — she would have fallen over for certain if not for how tightly his arms wrapped around her waist.

Leighton felt tears on her barely-exposed skin as she wrapped her own arms around Matthew as best she could. She turned her head to press a kiss to his cheekbone and said softly, “Did you really think I was going to be able to survive spending a whole Christmas without you?”

He laughed in disbelief and admitted, “I almost didn’t. Just ask them.” He nodded toward his family, who were now all huddled in the entryway together. She giggled and smiled brightly at them, the family who had long treated her as one of their own — including the probable future father-in-law who had schemed to get her to them as soon as humanly possible after her game had concluded.

Before she could step inside to greet them, though, Matthew firmly grabbed her face in both his hands and gave her a long, tender kiss — the kind that told her just how much she had been missed.

“I can’t believe you’re here. God, I love you, Leighton,” he whispered, nuzzling her cold nose with his warm one. “You’re all I wanted for Christmas this year.”

[girlactionfigure]

When he pushed his son in his wheelchair one last time, he showed the love a father has for his son, a father who never gave up on his son, a father who carried and pushed his son through some of the most grueling events to prove to the world that no matter what society thinks, no matter what disabilities you may have, no matter what obstacles you may face, you CAN achieve your dreams.

His name was Dick Hoyt. He “became an icon in the sports world while pushing his son, Rick, who's a quadriplegic and has cerebral palsy, across the finish line of more than a thousand races, according to NPR.

The Peace Page has shared many stories of Team Hoyt. Sadly, however, the Peace Page regrets to update readers that on March 17 of this year, Dick Hoyt died at the age of 80 after battling a heart condition.

For this Father’s Day weekend, the Peace Page honors Dick Hoyt.

~~~~~

“A son’s relationship with his father is one that can leave an indelible mark on both parties, but there aren’t many fathers – or sons – that have the ability to leave that same mark on a community of people that, too often, have no voice,” according to the CerebralPalsy website.

“Dick Hoyt was such an iconic figure at the Boston Marathon that in 2013, a statue was erected in his honor near the starting line in Hopkinton, Mass., according to Des Bieler of the Washington Post. “The statue shows two people: Hoyt and his son Rick, in a wheelchair being pushed, as he was for tens of thousands of miles over hundreds of endurance events, by his devoted father.”

The plaque next to the statue reads, “Yes You Can!” 

~~~~~

“Dick Hoyt was born on June 1, 1940, in Winchester, Mass.,” according to the The New York Times. “He married his high school sweetheart, Judy Leighton, the head cheerleader, in 1961, soon after they graduated. She went on to found Kamp for Kids, which allowed children with and without disabilities to go to camp together.”

Rick was born in 1962. As a result of oxygen deprivation to his brain at the time of his birth, he was diagnosed as a spastic quadriplegic with cerebral palsy. Doctors advised the family to institutionalize him, saying he would be nothing more than a "vegetable." 

In his book, “Dick Hoyt, Devoted: The Story of a Father’s Love for His Son (2010),” Hoyt said:

“When doctors left us alone after delivering the news, Judy and I had a good cry. Then we had a serious conversation…I knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but this was my boy, my namesake. I loved him from the moment I saw him. I was determined to be the best father I could, regardless of whether he had a disability.”

The Hoyts would not give up on their son, treating him like any other child and loving and encouraging him. Thirteen years later, Rick was admitted into public school and would later attend Boston University, graduating with a degree in Special Education in 1993.

After his father retired in 1995 as a Lt. Colonel from the Air National Guard, after serving his country for 37 years, Rick told his father he wanted to participate in a 5-mile benefit run for a Lacrosse player who had been paralyzed in an accident. 

In an NPR interview, Dick Hoyt remembers his son communicating to him via a computer, ”Dad, I have to do something for him. I want to let him know that life goes on even though he's paralyzed. I want to run in the race.”

Even though Dick was not a long-distance runner, he still agreed to push his son in his wheelchair. The father and son team came in next to last, but they finished all 5 miles.

In The Special Fathers Network podcast, Dick Hoyt said his son told him, “Dad, when I’m out on a run, it feels like my disability disappears.” 

That to Dick Hoyt was "powerful."

“From that point, the two completed more than 1,100 races, including 5Ks, marathons, and triathlon competitions,” according to writer Khari Thompson. “Additionally, they ran the Boston Marathon every year from 1980 to 2014, sometimes unofficially, only failing to finish the race in 2013 due to the marathon bombing.”

“When my dad and I are out there on a run, a special bond forms between us,” Rick Hoyt told The New York Times in 2009 with the help of his computer voice program. “And it feels like there is nothing Dad and I cannot do.”

Dick added, “I am the body. Rick is the heart and mobility is freedom.”

One Father's Day, Rick was asked what he would like to give his father if he could give him anything. Rick didn't hesitate - he said he would have his dad sit in a chair, and he would like the ability to be able to push his dad for once, just like he pushed him all those years, to become who he was, to have him feel the love and the strength his father has given him.

Dick Hoyt would later say, “When Rick was born, they said he’d be nothing but a vegetable. Now he’s a bronze statue. It can’t get any better than that.”

~~~~~

Speaking of his father, Rick said, “I learned about trust. I learned to rely on him to endure physically so we could compete together.” 

Rick’s brother, Russ, said of his father, “He did what he did because Rick inspired him to do it. To be able to say that your dad is your hero — he is.”

Rick, who at 59 can no longer endure long races because of his bouts with pneumonia, remembers his father’s most important message: “Never give up on your dreams.”

~ jsr

The Jon S. Randal Peace Page

[soc-characters-as-songs]

oc characters as romantic comedies?

ivy: return to me ("heartbroken and struggling emotionally after his wife's death in a car accident, bob rueland (david duchovny) agrees to go on a blind date set up by his friend Charlie (david alan grier). though the date fizzles, sparks fly between bob and the waitress, grace (minnie driver), a recovered heart transplant patient with intimacy problems of her own. when bob discovers grace's heart came from his own organ donor wife, an unusual romance blossoms between the two.")

meredith: sabrina ("sabrina fairchild (julia ormond) is a chauffeur's daughter who grew up with the wealthy larrabee family. she always had unreciprocated feelings for david (greg kinnear), the family's younger son and playboy. but after returning from paris, sabrina has become a glamorous woman who gets david's attention. his older, work-minded brother linus (harrison ford) thinks their courtship is bad for the family business and tries to break them up -- but then he starts to fall for her too.")

diana: life partners ("a 29-year-old lawyer (gillian jacobs) and her lesbian best friend (leighton meester) experience a dramatic shift in their longtime bond after one enters a serious relationship.")

alassie: the wedding singer ("set in 1985, adam sandler plays a nice guy with a broken heart who's stuck in one of the most romantic jobs in the world, a wedding singer. he loses all hope when he is abandoned at the altar by his fiancé. he meets a young woman named julia (drew barrymore), who enlists his help to plan her wedding. he falls in love with her and must win her over before she gets married.")

ramona: under the tuscan sun ("when frances mayes (diane lane) learns her husband is cheating on her from a writer whom she gave a bad review, her life is turned upside down. in an attempt to bring her out of a deep depression, her best friend, patti (sandra oh), encourages frances to take a tour of italy. during the trip, the new divorcée impulsively decides to purchase a rural tuscan villa and struggles to start her life anew amid colorful local characters, including the handsome marcello (raoul bova).")

rhea: music and lyrics ("former music superstar alex fletcher (hugh grant) used to pack them in back in the 1980s, but now he is reduced to playing nostalgia tours and county fairs. he scores a chance at a major comeback when reigning pop diva cora corman (haley bennett) asks him to write a song for her, but he hasn't written anything in years and cannot compose lyrics anyway. noticing that sophie (drew barrymore), the plant lady, has a way with words, alex proposes that he and sophie make beautiful music together.")

cornelia: man up ("when a man (simon pegg) mistakes her for his blind date, a woman (lake bell) decides to play along to see what happens.")

kaden: my big fat greek wedding ("everyone in the portokalos family worries about toula (nia vardalos). still unmarried at 30 years old, she works at dancing zorba's, the greek restaurant owned by her parents, gus (michael constantine) and maria (lainie kazan). after taking a job at her aunt's travel agency, she falls in love with ian miller (john corbett), a teacher who is tall, handsome and definitely not greek. toula isn't sure which will be more upsetting to her father, that ian is a foreigner or that he's a vegetarian.")

andreia: wimbledon ("frustrated at his own failures and disillusioned with professional sports, tennis player peter colt (paul bettany) resolves to retire from competition and become an instructor at an exclusive private club. but when colt receives a surprise wild-card berth in wimbledon, he can't help but enter the tournament. soon, colt meets lizzie bradbury (kirsten dunst), a beautiful american tennis player with an upcoming match of her own, and finds the inspiration he hopes will turn his luck around.")

suzy: you've got mail ("struggling boutique bookseller kathleen kelly (meg ryan) hates joe fox (tom hanks), the owner of a corporate foxbooks chain store that just moved in across the street. when they meet online, however, they begin an intense and anonymous Internet romance, oblivious of each other's true identity. eventually joe learns that the enchanting woman he's involved with is actually his business rival. he must now struggle to reconcile his real-life dislike for her with the cyber love he's come to feel.")

samuel: 10 things I hate about you ("kat stratford (julia stiles) is beautiful, smart and quite abrasive to most of her fellow teens, meaning that she doesn't attract many boys. unfortunately for her younger sister, bianca (larisa oleynik), house rules say that she can't date until kat has a boyfriend, so strings are pulled to set the dour damsel up for a romance. soon kat crosses paths with handsome new arrival patrick verona (heath ledger). will kat let her guard down enough to fall for the effortlessly charming Patrick?")

bianca: 13 going on 30 ("a girl who's sick of the social strictures of junior high is transformed into a grownup overnight. In this feel-good fairy tale, teenager jenna (christa b. allen) wants a boyfriend, and when she's unable to find one, she fantasizes about being a well-adjusted adult. suddenly, her secret desire becomes a reality, and she is transformed into a 30-year-old (jennifer garner). but adulthood, with its own set of male-female challenges, isn't as easy as it looks.")

archibald: sleeping with other people ("twelve years after a one-night stand, a man (jason sudeikis) and a woman (alison brie) run into each other and try to maintain a platonic relationship despite their mutual attraction.")

raphael: bride and prejudice ("with four beautiful daughters of marrying age, manorama (nadira babbar) and chaman bakshi (anupam kher) frantically seek out the perfect husbands for their children. yet their eldest daughter, lalita (aishwarya rai), is intent upon marrying at her own choosing, for love. lalita endures a number of hopeful suitors, but the american william darcy (martin henderson) seems different -- and not always in a good way. misunderstandings, schemes and lies threaten to keep the two from true love.")

[doubleattitude]

OCPAA

KAR, Costa Mesa, CA 2021: RESULTS

Primary:

5 and Under Solo

1st: Brooklyn Guerrero-’Lip Gloss’

2nd: Sydney Johnson-’Fergalicious’

3rd: Taylor Godlewski-’My Heart’

4th: Sloane Schuster-’When I Grow Up’

7th: Kimiko Evans-’Just The Way You Are’

9th: June Khoury-’Junie In A Bottle’

10th: Kylee Densmore-’Shake Your Tail Feather’

5 and Under Duet/Trio

1st: ‘Secret Chord’

2nd: 'Single Ladies’

5 and Under Large Group

1st: 'Once Upon A Time’

6-8 Solo

2nd: Cece Chung-’And I Am Telling You’

5th: Nyla Mccarthy-’Wind It Up’

10th: Kailee Lozano-’What You Know About Me’

11th: Everly Fritchie-’Hallelujah’

12th: Makenzie Rowland-’Rise Up’

14th: Ashley Issa-’Monsters’

6-8 Duet/Trio

2nd: 'Riding Dirty’

3rd: 'Beat It’

4th: 'Wash That Man’

6-8 Small Group

1st: 'Boujee Girls’

2nd: 'Silent Night’

5th: 'Black Cat’

6th: 'Humble and Kind’

6-8 Large Group

1st: 'Beach Party’

6-8 Line

1st: 'Icon’

9-11 Solo

2nd: Riley Stem-’Life of the Party’

3rd: Kelsey Pastian-’Forget About The Boy’

8th: Harlee Lozano-’Cold Hearted Snake’

9-11 Small Group

4th: 'Bring On The Men’

Secondary:

6-8 Solo

1st: Avery Olson-’Broadway On The Brain’

2nd: Dylan Reuss-’Lost Boy’

4th: Brinley Lowe-’Candyman’

5th: Audrina Mossembekker-’Fields of Gold’

6th: Leighton Godlewski-’Hold Your Hand’

7th: Journee Phillip-’Misdemeanor’

9th: Ariella Truong-’True Colors’

10th: Kyle Chen-’Goodbye Yellow Brick Road’

6-8 Duet/Trio

2nd: ‘Fly’

3rd: ‘Snow White’

6-8 Small Group

1st: 'Out of This World’

2nd: 'Let There Be Peace’

3rd: 'Bad Romance’

4th: 'The Buzz’

6-8 Large Group

1st: 'Poker Face’

2nd: ‘Carry That Weight’

3rd: 'Diamonds are Forever’

9-11 Solo

1st: Helena Olaerts-’Bend and Snap’

2nd: Esme Lee-’Chandelier’

4th: Ariel Lantz-Lola-’Wonder’

5th: Jillian Mahan-’Bills’

7th: Alyssa Mastroianni-’Crippled Bird’

8th: Jordyn Rockett-’Power’

9th: Sara Von Rotz-’Locomotion’

10th: Grace Montano-’Vogue’

13th: Grace Howerton-’Entertain You’

18th: Amber Janio-’Teen Spirit’

19th: Alexandra Collins-’Read All About It’

9-11 Duet/Trio

1st: 'Memory’

9-11 Small Group

1st: 'I Was Broken’

9-11 Large Group

1st: 'Falling In Love’

12-14 Solo

5th: Alexa Hedlund-’Egyptian Lover’

Intermediate:

9-11 Solo

1st: Brooke Edwards-’Yellow Brick Road’

4th: Sophia Fleischman-’Rhapsody’

5th: Kylie Gonzalez-’Take Me to Church’

6th: Millea Hill-’Proud Mary’

7th: Keira Pagaza-’Hold Your Breath’

9th: Kiley Lowe-’Wallflower’

9-11 Small Group

2nd: 'Breakin Dishes’

3rd: 'Where Are We’

9-11 Large Group

1st: 'Little Bird’

12-14 Solo

5th: Presslie Novits-’Let Me Entertain You’

12-14 Large Group

2nd: 'Lost Without You’

Elite:

9-11 Solo

1st: Arabella Kim-’Unchained’

9-11 Large Group

1st: 'Sushi’

12-14 Solo

1st: Naia Parker-’Que Sera’

2nd: Olivia Magni-’Moonlight Sonata’

3rd: Sammi Chung-’Eight’

4th: Hope Edwards-’Keeping Me Down’

6th: Mackenzie Kleveno-’Beats’

9th: Delaney Bojorquez-’Tessellate’

10th: Ella Montano-’Lonely’

11th: Brooke Volkert-’I Will Survive’

12th: Ashlyn Blanpied-’Fever’

13th: Libby Haye-’Work Song’

14th: Madelyn Laussade-’Gotcha’

15th: Morgan Landrigan-’Train Wreck’

12-14 Small Group

1st: 'Ramalama’

2nd: ‘Maneater’

3rd: 'My Darling’

4th: 'Heartbreak Hotel’

5th: 'Solo Dancing’

15-19 Solo

1st: Aleialanee Ponce De Leon-’Love Song’

10th: Cameron Chen-’Desperado’

15-19 Small Group

2nd: 'Gravity’

Title Competition:

Primary Miss Mini Dance

Winner: Taylor Godlewski-’My Heart’

3rd runner-up: June Khoury-’Junie In A Bottle’

4th runner-up: Emma Walters-’Countdown’

Primary Petite Miss Dance

1st runner-up: Nyla Mccarthy-’Wind It Up’

Secondary Petite Miss Dance

Winner: Leighton Godlewski-’Hold Your Hand’

2nd runner-up: Audrina Mossembekker-’Once Upon Another Time’

3rd runner-up: Ariella Truong-’True Colors’

5th runner-up: Cerys Cogswell-’Pure Imagination’

Secondary Junior Miss Dance

Winner: Jillian Mahan-’Ladies On The Floor’

1st runner-up: Ariel Lantz-Lola-’Wonder’

4th runner-up: Alyssa Mastroianni-’Crippled Bird’

Intermediate Junior Miss Dance

1st runner-up: Liliana Mastroiannai-’Once Upon A Dream

Elite Junior Miss Dance

Winner: Arabella Kim-’Unchained’

Elite Teen Miss Dance

2nd runner-up: Alina Marquez-’Purple Rain’

Special Awards:

Studio of Excellence

Primary

Orange County Performing Arts Academy

Secondary

Orange County Performing Arts Academy

Intermediate

Orange County Performing Arts Academy

Best Costume

‘Heartbreak Hotel’

‘Maneater’

Most Entertaining

‘Breakin Dishes’

Junior Photogenic

Harlee Lozano

Judges Choice

Cuteness Overload

‘Once Upon A Time’

Proptastic

‘Hopelessly Devoted’.

Winning Hand

‘Poker Face’

IDA:

Outstanding Performance

Jazz: ‘Maneater’

Lyrical/Modern: 'Ramalama’

Ballet/Open/Acro/Gym: 'My Darling’

[let-me-love-you-loki]

An Ending Within--Ch. 8

Chapter 8

           The house in Davenport was bursting with noise. I was in the kitchen, pulling a ham from the oven, while Seth pulled plastic plates from the cabinet. The counter was piled high with food—green beans, cooked carrots, mashed potatoes, gravy, roasted corn, biscuits, hot baked apple pies—and cheesecakes waited in the fridge. Our dining table was nowhere near big enough for the group who had joined us for an early Easter dinner. Luckily, the weather was nice and we could eat outside.

           Roman swept through with Sefina on his hip and his daughter JoJo trailing right behind. He plucked a carrot from the pan, blew on it, and held it out to Sefina, who gummed it apprehensively. “Fingers out of the food!” I called over my shoulder when I caught him.

           He laughed and rounded the counter, dropping a kiss on the top of my head. “Aua e te faʻalogo i lou tina faʻamaoni,” Roman cooed to his goddaughter.

           I turned toward him, brows raised. “Did you just tell my daughter not to listen to me?”

           “Maybe,” he replied before snatching a biscuit and dashing out of the room, JoJo on his heels.  

           I rolled my eyes as I basted the ham. “Everything ready?”

           Seth smiled. “Yeah, want me to get everybody?”

           I watched him walk toward our living room. He let out a yell and the noise died away. “Thanks for coming. There’s enough food for an army in there, so eat whatever you want. As much as you want.”

           Leaning against the counter, I watched as friends old and new crowded into the kitchen, forming a haphazard line at the food. Jon and Renee were in the middle of the pile, talking to Roman’s wife, Galina. Jericho was at the front of the line, grinning and making jokes with my brother Bran. The Jacksons were there-Matt and Dana, Nick and Ellen, all their kids—and so were Becky and Alexa. Seth hopped into the back of the line behind Adam and his wife Amanda, easily starting up conversation with both of them.

           “Seriously,” I said as Matt came by, “take as much as you want. Please.”

           “Don’t say that around The Elite unless you mean it,” he replied, lifting one brow. When I nodded, he shrugged and started piling up his plate. I grinned, happy to see my new family fitting almost seamlessly with the old.

           One by one, people passed by and loaded up their plates with food. Seth opened the backyard doors and soon, the party had spilled out onto the stone patio and beyond. The kids made use of a stack of patchwork blankets to have a picnic. The Jackson kids took up spots with JoJo and my nephews. Nick’s wife Ellen, her one-month old baby boy Michael in her arms, kept an eye on them.

           “I’m sorry Kenny and Cody couldn’t make it,” Matt said. He, Roman, my brother Georgie, and I were sitting on the deck steps.

           “Don’t worry about it,” I replied, looking out at the people milling about our backyard. I was happy to see Seth standing with Jon just like old times. For a moment, I was thrown back to the early days of my life in WWE. My adoption into The Shield.

           Roman bumped me in the shoulder. “It’s good to see you again, itiiti.”

           I grinned. “It’s good to see you too, uso.”

           Matt and Georgie had become fast friends. They shared a love of basketball and had quickly devolved into a good-natured argument over which team was better—Carolina or USC. I was also pleasantly surprised to find that Matt got on well with Seth. But I shouldn’t have been surprised based on how much those two loved coffee.

***

           Seth dragged the metal firepit out of the shed and set it up in the middle of the yard. He and Roman got it burning while Jon went in to grab the pile of marshmallows, chocolate bars, and graham crackers from the pantry. Matt, Nick, Bran, and Georgie worked together in a circle to strip some branches for roasting sticks. I sat with my sisters-in-law and Ellen and Dana. Sefina was curled up in my lap, her arms around my neck as she dozed on my shoulder. Baby Michael was cooing in his mother’s arms. The other kids swarmed Jon as soon as he appeared from inside the house, sweets in hand.

           “I’m surprised they’re all getting along,” I said quietly, watching how Roman and Seth slipped into easy conversation with Matt and Nick as they prepped the firepit for the kids. “If only the dirt sheets could see this…”

           Ellen chuckled. “None of them would ever admit it happened.”

           “Of course not. Jericho can’t be seen hanging out with Elite trash,” I replied.

           It had been almost a month since the pay-per-view, and I’d been spending most of my time with AEW running interference for Jericho and the Inner Circle, doing my best to distract Jon whenever I could. I’d attacked Jon from behind twice and, at least once, held his attention long enough for Jake Hager to sneak up from behind and choke him out. I could feel myself settling into my new life, but I missed traveling with my boys. It was strange to have so much time at home.

           Jon started opening packages and created a quick assembly line with Bran, Georgie, and Nick. One by one, they spiked marshmallows and gathered kids around the firepit. Dads and uncles and godfathers and friends kept the kids back far enough that they wouldn’t get hurt, but close enough that they could roast their marshmallows. I grinned as I listened to them. Adam insisted that the marshmallows had be burnt black before they were done. Roman looked like he wanted to throw a punch over that.

           I couldn’t remember the last time I was this happy. When I felt as fully loved and accepted as I’d ever been. I was so grateful that they had all taken the time to come with their families. That they would spend just a little bit of their free time with me.

***

           “Are you sure you’re not upset?” Seth asked as I packed my new gear into a bag. Dynamite that night was going live from the TaxSlayer Center in Davenport.

           An ache in my chest. Like my heart was being squeezed hard. A faint wishful sensation. The desire for what Jon and Renee had.

           “It’s fine, Seth,” I replied, shouldering the bag and heading down the hallway to kiss Sefina goodbye. She would be asleep by the time I got home. “I know how Vince can be. You don’t want to be seen at the competition’s show.”

           A spike of frustration. Maybe a little anger. I’d watched Britt Baker show up at WWE events with no repercussions on either side. Jon had popped up on an at-home edition of Backstage on FS1, but no one was told off.

           But Seth was… Seth. And he was Vince’s golden boy.

           “Llane… Sophie…” He snatched at my hands, pulling me back. “You know I’ll be watching. I haven’t missed a moment.”

           I forced a smile and leaned up on my toes to kiss him softly. “I know.”

***

           “Jon… Jon…” I stood at the top of the ramp, surrounded by the Inner Circle. Jericho stood at one shoulder, Hager at the other. “Don’t get too comfortable. You have something that belongs to us.”

           Pacing in the ring, Jon slammed into the ropes, title over one shoulder. He held the mic up to his mouth, eyes wide and wild. “You know what, Leighton, I’m sick of your mouth. And I’m sick of you following Jericho around like a little puppy and doing his dirty work. All because he’s not man enough to face me again.”

           I took a few steps forward. “I should challenge you for that title, Mox. You know as well as I do that there’s only one person in this company who has your number. And it’s not Chris.” I held my arms out, wiggling my fingers in his direction.

           Jericho took the mic from me and, giving that smarmy grin of his, taunted Jon. “What d’you say, Mox? Huh? Are you a champion or a coward?”

           I knew him. I knew the wheels were turning in his head. A little bit of Dean Ambrose slipped into his face. He paced, breathing heavy. He backed away from the ropes, running his free hand over his hair.

           “I guess that’s our answer,” Jericho laughed. We backed toward the entrance tunnel, the entire Inner Circle smirking as Jon stood in the ring looking like a fool.

           “I’m not the one getting a woman to do my dirty work,” Jon spat vehemently.

           The Inner Circle turned as a unit. I took off toward the ramp, only to be caught around the middle by Sammy Guevara. I flailed, actually kicking Sammy in the shin, trying to get to the ring. I knew Jon was only talking shit, but I couldn’t help but feel fire in my veins at the fact that I’d been called just a “woman.” I’d trained with Jon. I trained with Seth and Roman. I could hold my own with any of them even on my worst day.

           Jericho looked back at me and then toward the ring again. “Why don’t you find a partner, Jon. That is… if anyone in that women’s locker room can stand you. I know you have… history… in mixed matches.”

Tag List

@mox-made-me-do-it  @lakamaa12 @sammyfireheartashryver @cburdine @easyobsession​ @xbutterflius-effectusx​ @0paint-the-stars0​ @echrai @themumbler​ @bigdunneenergy​ @queenofthearchitect​ @vebner37​ @reigns-rollins-ambrose​ @mother-forker​ @gwyneirastorm

[andydrysdalerogers]

Cross-Checked ~ Chapter 14

Andy Barber x OFC Leighton "Leia" Andrews

Summary:

Andy Barber is having the best year of his life. His game is on point. It’s gets to play with his best friend and his fiancé just... dumped him?!. 

Reeling from a sudden change in status, Andy decides it’s time to just focus on hockey. Until his best friend's sister comes out with news that rock the entire organizations world., 

Andy has always carried a torch for the untouchable Leighton but in her hour of need, is now the time to shoot and score or risk getting cross - checked again? 

Warnings: Cheating (but not by the MCs); slow burn; friends to lovers eventually; SMUT!; pregnancy; jealousy; handsome goalies, evil exes...

A/N: The tag list is open!

I do NOT give permission for my work to be translated or reposted on here or any other site, even if you give me credit. DO NOT REPOST MY FICS. Reblogs, comments, likes, and feedback ALWAYS appreciated

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

Banners by me!

Previous: Chapter 13: Fit For A Princess

Series Masterlist // Main Masterlist

Chapter 14: Mother Knows Best

Andy 

Week 26 

I’ve always appreciated Luke and Leia’s parents.  Their father would be at every game until he passed.  Their mother, Monica, would drive us to the early morning practices and take Leia to figure skating lessons.  They took me in when my dad bailed, and my mom had to work nights to support us.   

Monica was my support when Mom died and I was a scared 20-year-old, on my own for the first time. I had every respect for her.  

Until I was 25 at least.  

That’s when she checked out of all of our lives, Leia especially.  

Monica had it in her mind that she needed to remarry rich to support her children.  Her children that are amazing all on their own. She had a superstar son, who could have taken care of her and a daughter that started her own business.  But to Monica, Leia’s smarts were not enough for a woman in a man’s world. She believed Leia needed to give up her dreams and marry someone who will take care of her.  

This broke Leia for a long time.  

Luke and I did our best to hold Leia up while she dealt with the ramifications of her mother’s words. It unfortunately led to Bret and well here we are. We had gotten her past it.  I thought I had made her happy.  We were going to be a real family now.  

I did not have Monica Andrews on my bingo card.  

“Mom? What are you doing here?” Leia was standing at the door, gripping it like her life depended on it.  I moved quickly to be behind her.  

“Hi Mrs. Andrews.”  

“It's DeLaurentis, now, Andrew. Leighton, my goodness, you have really popped.”  

I flinch at the backhanded compliment. “Umm, come on in, Mrs. DeLaurentis.” I pulled Leia with me to allow her mother in. I looked at Leia and she shrugged with a confused look that must have matched mine.  I moved when she made it to the living room. “Mrs. DeLaurentis, these are my teammates, Linus Ullmark, Brad Marchant and David Pasternak and you remember Stella and Miranda. Guys, this is Luke and Leia’s mother, Monica DeLaurentis.”  

Everyone greets her and she says her hellos.  She turns back to Leia. “May I speak to you alone, Leighton?” I don’t like the way she says my girl’s name.  Like its a swear word. It grinds my nerves.  

As they walked into my office, I had a bad feeling in my stomach.  I turned to Miranda. “Get Luke back on the phone.”  

Leia 

I was still in shock that my mother was back in town, and she was married. I don’t remember being invited to that. “I’m surprised to see you, Mother.”  

“Well, I’ve been busy.”  

I looked at her left hand and the giant diamond on her finger.  “I can see that.  Congratulations.”  I stopped. “You married Summer’s father?” 

My mother looks put out by my question. “Its not like he’s still married.”  

“Mother, his wife died less than a year ago.” I was incredibly annoyed with her. Monica Andrews, sorry, DeLaurentis, had not been a shallow woman before my father died. She had been the typical stay at home mom that you see on old 50’s TV shows, apron and all. She had been my best friend, like any little girl would have. It was great. Until my dad died. She lasted five years. By the time I was 20, she was gone.  

“Don’t talk to me like that Leighton,” my mother huffed. “How come your brother isn’t here?” 

“He was named the Bruins all-star so he’s in Toronto right now.” 

“Well, I would like to meet with both of you at the same time.” She looked at me up and down again. “We have some things to talk about.”  

Andy walked in right them. “Mrs. DeLaurentis, it’s Luke.” He handed her the phone.  

“Lukas, when do you come back?... Well, I don’t want to have this conversation twice... The day you get back would be best...” She handed the phone back to Andy.  “I’ll meet you on Monday at the Cafe,” she said to me.  “Apparently, we have a lot to discuss.”  

I wasn’t sure if that was going to be a good thing or a bad. “Like what?” 

“I’d rather not say since you have company or rather Andrew has company.”  She gave a distasteful look to us. “I’ll see myself out.” She turned without a goodbye.  

My knees were shaking and I grabbed onto the island.  Andy saw me and immediately put his arms around me. “Hey, baby, take a breath.”  

“She didn’t even ask about the baby or anything,” I whispered. “I don’t want to go alone.”  

Andy snorted. “Like there was a chance that I would let you. The three of us will go, just like always, ok?”  He cupped my face.  “I won’t let anything happen.”  

If only I could believe him.  

Monday comes and I don’t want to get out of bed.  I was in and out of sleep but Andy cuddled up next to me, running his hand through my hair and I was asleep. Cheeky brat knows how to calm me.  I groan when the alarm goes off.  

“Sorry, my queen.  I have a team meeting.”  He kissed my head, but I grabbed onto his arm.  

“No, you are warm and you’re comfy.  Mine.” I snuggle deeper into his chest and Andy lets out a low laugh.  

“I am yours, my queen, but I still have to get up. You wanted me to wake you so you could get ready for lunch with your mom.” He kissed my nose.  “Something about wanting to have that pregnancy glow so she couldn’t be a bitch about it.”  

I vaguely remember saying that to him, but he is right.  After the awful look she gave me about my bump, I don’t want to go in there looking anything less than perfect.  

The relationship between my mother and myself is complicated at best. When my dad died, my mom tried to be strong for us. But it was like half of her soul left with him.  My dad was smart, there was savings and a life insurance policy. But my mother got it in her head that she needed to find a way to provide for us. But she didn’t want to get a job. She had been a housewife and that’s all she assumed she knew.  

And that’s all she wanted for me.  

As I pull on the pale pink sweater dress and leggings, my mind drift to the day after Bret and I split.  

“Why are you breaking up? He will be a wonderful partner and provider for you Leighton.” My mom sips her tea at the hotel we met at. Yeah, you heard me, hotel. Because my mother left the house my father had built for her. Lucky that Luke bought it from her otherwise our childhood home would be long gone.  

“That is not what I want from my life Mother. I want a partner to grow with me, help me, not treat me like I’m a servant. Daddy didn’t raise me like that.”  

“You have no idea what your father wanted,” she retorted. “Bret is handsome, wealthy...” 

“Controlling, egotistical, narcissistic,” I finished for her. “He’s in Tokyo and he belittled me and dreams.”  

“I think you are making a mistake Leighton.”  

Andy pulls up to the hotel where they are serving afternoon tea.  I’m grateful as I am not allowed more than one cup of coffee a day, which is a tragedy onto itself. I see Luke sitting in the lobby. “Why didn’t you go inside?” 

“And be alone with the Mother? Do you hate me, Cubby?” He gives me a soft hug.  “Missed you.” 

“You were gone for four days,” Andy says as they man-hug. “Let’s not make her wait or suffer her wrath.”  

Andy guides me with his hand on the small of my back, Luke leading the way.  My mom is sitting at a table with Kyle DeLaurentis. Fuck my life. The new stepfather.  I try not to have a sour face because I don’t need to hear it from her.  “Hi Mother.”  

“Leighton, Lucas and Andrew, this is a surprise.” She gave us air kisses before she turned to Kyle. “This is Kyle, my husband.”  

Andy moves first. “Mr. DeLaurentis, it's nice to see you again. Andrew Barber.”  

“I’ve been watching Andrew. Bruins are looking good.  Lukas,” he offers his hand to Luke to shake. “Congratulations on the All Star nomination.”  

“Thanks,” Luke says tightly.  

“This is my daughter, Leighton,” my mom says.  

“Leighton, you look beautiful,” taking my offered hand and kissing my knuckles. I try not to shudder at the ick factor that I am getting from Kyle. I went to school with his daughter, Summer, and spent time with their family and I hadn’t felt this before but now I do. Andy, thankfully, pulls a chair for me between him and Luke and we sit as the waiter starts to take orders.  

“Andrew, can I ask why you decided to join us today?” my mother asked.  

He shrugs. “Leia asked me to come.”  

The waiter drops the drinks and an uncomfortable silence. My mother clears her throat and took a sip of her tea before she said, “you are living with Andrew now.” Not a question.  

I looked at her.  “Yes, I am.”  

She scoffed. “An unmarried, pregnant woman living with a man that is not the father.”  

I can feel Andy tense next to me. “Yes, she is. Except Leia and I are now together.”  

My mother gives us a sharp look. “And what about Bret?” 

“What about him? He left me, I told him I am pregnant. I never got a response. I’ve moved on with someone who loves and cares for me and my daughter.” Andy takes my hand and gently squeezes to try and calm me.  

“Love, please relax,” he whispers. I try to take a deep breath, but she doesn’t let up. 

“You should be with the father, Leighton.  A baby cannot be raised in a broken home.”  

“It’s not broken! She has a father! Andy is the father!” I stand up and move to the bathroom, trying not to cry. How can she say that? Our family is not broken. Me and Andy and Luke and Miranda are our own family. We make it perfect. The tears flow as I hit the door. I make it and take a few minutes to myself, letting the tears fall. Once I can gather myself, I clean up my face and head out. And ran right into my mother.  

“That display was embarrassing, Leighton,” she says sternly.  

“Embarrassing for whom? You?” I swallow the yell that wants to come out. “I am not some helpless woman who needs a man to take care of her. I have my business, I have my work with the team, I have Luke and I have Andy. Andy, who knows everything and still loves me. He loves my daughter, even if she isn’t biologically his. You have changed so much since Daddy died that I don’t even recognize you. You’re like a super Stepford wife and you only care about money and status.” 

“You have no idea what it's like for your partner to die and leave you with two children to raise!” 

“Raise? I was 14 when dad died. You didn’t raise me. You left us! I refuse to do that to my daughter.”  

“You ungrateful little brat!” I saw my mother raise her hand and I went to block her when another hand stopped her.  

“What the fuck do you think you are doing Mother? “Luke was raging at his mother. “Leia has gestational hypertension, and you are doing this? You need to leave!” 

“Lucas, how can you treat your mother this way?” 

“Easy. When someone is being a complete bitch to their daughter, I can easily make the right choice. Until you can apologize to Leia, stay away from her, don’t call.”  

“Lucas,” she cries.  

“I get it. You lost it when dad dies but that is no excuse.” 

Andy had been holding me and he turned me to walk out of the hotel as the tears fell. I knew my mother had changed but it was shocking to see it.  My mother had never tried to strike me before.  

But she would no longer be a part of my life.  

Suddenly, a sharp pain flashed through my body and I stopped and cried out. “Leia?” Andy holds me to him. “Baby, what’s wrong?” 

“I don’t know,” I cried. Andy lifted me up as Luke ran for the car. “Andy?” 

“Its gonna be ok, baby. We’re gonna get you to the hospital.” He kisses my head as Luke pulls up. Andy puts me in the car, climbs in after me and Luke races away.  

Please let my baby be ok.  

NEXT

Taglist:

@patzammit

@texmexdarling

@slutforchrisjamalevans

@firephotogrl74

@tinkerbelle67

@before-we-get-started

@bunnyforhim

@alexakeyloveloki

@sunnyhummingbee

@whiskeytangofoxtrot555

@peaceinourtime82

@saucy-sassy-sparkly

@kmc1989

@kandis-mom

@lokislady82

[sandriinehebert]

say hello to my (revamped) little friend :)))))

lea michele has been my idol and source of inspiration ever since i was 11 years-old. i looked up to her and loved her and supported her. i met my two closest friends because of glee and lea. she’s the reason i got into glee, and glee is the reason why i decided to join roleplay years ago. i owe so much to lea. that being said, i do not support, condone or accept her alleged behavior. i knew about her being self-centered and difficult to work with, but i never thought i would log online some night searching for instagram photos for sandrine and find out all of that. i was reading the twitter thread all night long and watching a decade of my life disappear before my eyes. i know my feelings are worth nothing and are completely irrelevant & meaningless compared to the gravity of the situation that brought out all of these allegations. i also want to point out this is not a representation of mine or sandrine’s views on racism, bullying, performance activism or politics.

one of the first things that came to mine was sandrine and this group. i never bragged about being original, so it should come as no surprise that sandrine took a lot of characteristics from lea. her bubbly and lively personality, the tiny but mighty energy, the italian family background, the singing part, the cooking, the love of beauty, everything from her looks to her voice, it screams lea michele when i think about sandrine. changing her faceclaim was not an easy thing to do, because it implies changing this character i cherish with all of my heart. anyway, here’s a list of things that will change about sandrine from now on / things that will stay the same.

changes:

the faceclaim. lea is sephardi jewish (of turkish and greek descent) as well as italian. try and match that, it’s hard. plus, finding someone who is as expressive and joyful as sandrine is difficult too. i decide to use demet özdemir (who’s of turkish, bulgarian and german descent from what i read). compared to lea, i don’t know anything about her whatsoever. i lurked through gif tags and photos and she seems promising. if i don’t feel good using her, i will change to leighton meester and review, once again, the family background. (shoutout to lina for helping me, a true life saver!!!! <3)

alessandra “sandrine” serafina hébert. her last name changes. it is no longer lombardi, but hébert. (pronounced eh-bert in english, or hey-ber in french because the t is silent, i did some genalogy research and the surname hébert was, in some parts of the province, adapted from german so it fits with demet).

her age. sandrine is 30 turning 31 in september instead of 33 going 34.

her parents’ name. i will not redo the whole family post i did ages ago, but they all get a change of name and history. adamo is now only adam, and he’s 33 instead of 35. christian hébert is her father and monica evans is the mother. corinna remains corinna. christian’s father’s last name was actually esmer, but he changed to hébert when he moved in order to try and fit in the community.  the whole italian family storyline goes in the garbage bin, but since, historically speaking, traditional quebecer values are not that different from family, food and making babies, i’m good with that! i am absolutely not familiar with turkish and canadian history & relations so i have a lot of research to do there just to feel comfortable with this. i knew more about italo-québécois from school and from writing a paper about this community, hence why i felt no discomfort using cultural and historical aspects in sandrine’s story. montréal has the second largest turkish community of canada from stats i found, so, still, it’s not completely off either.

her career in ice skating / the reason she quit. sandrine will still be a successful figure skater who was amongst the best of her province, but i’ll twist things up. i won’t have her quit at 18, rather at 20. because (drum roll) i will give her a love interest. she started doing couple figure skating competitions at 17 and fell in love with her partner. they dated for three years, that innocent first relationship kind of love and he broke-up because he felt like he was too young to commit. hence why she still believes no one will ever love her as much as she loves them.

her timeline will go like this: at 20 she quit ice skating and dropped out of university. from 20 to 24 she stayed at home in montréal with her parents. from 24 to 26, she was roommates with adam in boston. and from 26 to now, 30 going 31, she is living on her own, running her salon in devinstone.

what stays the same:

lea’s voice is sandrine’s voice. when i write dialogues (which means 99% of all of my replies bc i can’t write), i hear lea’s voice. sandrine’ voice and singing voice will remain lea’s. that is unfortunately something i can’t let go of. 

she’s still lea’s height even if demet is 5″7.

she still has 2 of lea’s tattoos: the coffee mug and the musical notes.

she’s still a beautician. that does not change one bit! she still loves cooking. she still loves being annoying.

i will not delete any posts from before. i have so many faceclaim posts and instagram photos queued that some might slip away but those, i will delete them if i notice they get posted on accident. my queue has over 40 posts so it glitches and doesn’t always show me what’s in there.

everything else. she’s still the reincarnation of poppy from trolls, anna from frozen and pinkie pie from my little pony. big dumb dumb energy and all!

a faceclaim change should not be that big of a deal. but i’m a big baby who adored a celebrity for so long and i’m learning a hard lesson right now. i will proceed to changing her icon, theme, url, and to send a whole new biography to the main in the next couple of days. the main will also be contacted when they’ll come back to tumblr. since i don’t have discord, i couldn’t contact them sooner. i need time to process everything and to change sandrine’s muse without losing it. thank you for reading all of this and i am truly sorry if me using lea michele as a faceclaim ever offended any of you. i owed all of you an explanation and an apology as to why it takes so much time to change everything (idk who sent me this anon about me having to change my faceclaim but i was aware i had to do so since the moment i read the first tweets so i hope you didn’t worry about that too much). again, i’m sorry. stay safe, ily guys! <3

[vmheadquarters]

Twelve years ago today, UPN (RIP!) premiered a cult-classic neo-noir about murder, class warfare, sexual assault, and forbidden love. It was quippy and campy and smart as hell—and it just happened to center on a pint-sized blonde who looked like a cheerleader but thought like Sherlock Holmes. The show was Veronica Mars, and even if the last decade has muddled its legacy with a much-hyped but ultimately disappointing fan-funded follow-up film and, of course, the extremely meh third season, the high school years remain an unparalleled success. Veronica Mars seasons one and two were better than anything that had come before, far surpassed its competition in quality, and set a high bar for future shows that has only barely been met by a few episodes of television here and there. So give my regards to Friday Night Lights (a family show, not a teen show) and Degrassi (please), but Veronica Mars is the best teen show of all time*. 

1. Nuanced Class Conflict

Gossip Girl and The OC did it well, but Veronica Mars did it better. Even though Neptune, CA, is technically fictional, it's as real a place as has ever been portrayed on television. Its particular problems and reputation informed everything from law enforcement (the question of whether or not to incorporate the town into a city and make the sheriff's office into a police department) to the biker gangs riding through on their way up and down the PCH. The levels of privilege/lack thereof were so nuanced and specific. Other shows divide people into the Haves and the Have Nots; on Veronica Mars, everyone has something a little different. At the bottom of the socioeconomic ladder is Weevil, whose background is not only impoverished but criminal; the only community he can "afford" is a gang (though his crew isn't all bad—you'll find nary a broad stroke or generalization in the world of Veronica Mars). In the center of things are Veronica and Keith, who lived comfortably when Keith was sheriff, but have buckled their belts since he became a private eye. On the one hand, they own a small business! On the other, they live in a pretty crap apartment complex and have nowhere near enough saved to send Veronica to college. Then there's the nouveau-riche Echolls', who have all the glamorous trappings of wealth (cars, booze, mansion) and pretty much none of the cultural capital. At the top of the heap are the Kanes; while the Echolls' have enough money to "get away" with murder, the Kanes have enough money to get away with it, cover it up, frame someone else for it, and get the sheriff fired for looking into it. Money problems are basically the least-juicy of TV plots, but by using wealth disparity as a way to develop the characters, essentially building it into the DNA of the show, Veronica Mars created a TV universe just as interesting and complicated as that of Friday Night Lights or Parks and Recreation.

2. Lianne Mars

A girl with a missing mom is a fairy tale trope as old as time, rooted in a deification-of-the-female version of misogyny that I don't have time to get into right now. Suffice it to say, a dead or absentee mother is usually a sign of lazy writing. It's a way to reduce the character count and set a heroine adrift while, not coincidentally, making it so the (usually male) writer doesn't have to think of what a grown woman would think or talk or act like. At first, this is the fate of Veronica's mother, Lianne Mars. She was just conveniently...gone, another casualty of the fallout from the Lilly Kane murder investigation. Her absence lets Veronica be angsty and ill-supervised even as Keith Mars entered the canon of Bestest TV Dads of All Time (which he is! Love Keith forever and ever). But then she came back, with baggage, and the trope was, if not redeemed, at least put to good use. Lianne is an alcoholic who couldn't deal with the disappointing turns life took, and she finally cracked when her husband ran directly into conflict with her lost love Jake Kane, for whom she still pined. Even when she decides she wants to be a mom again, she can't quit being an alcoholic. And as heartbreaking as it is to watch Veronica play the parent, it's also a moment of growth. Veronica realizes—or rather, decides—that she isn't doomed to repeat her mother's mistakes. She is a stronger, better person than Lianne. A person big enough to love her flawed mother, even strong enough to forgive her. In the third episode, Veronica says, "The hero is the one that stays, and the villain is the one that splits." By the end of the series, Veronica has learned what true villainy looks like, and it ain't her mom. Showrunners, take note: This is how you do a realistic redemption story.

3. The Guest Stars and Bit Players

The casting department at Veronica Mars did flawless work. Obviously, the core cast is great, but the semi-regulars and guests are also amazing. There's an entire season devoted to Steve fucking Guttenberg. Lisa Rinna and Harry Hamlin play the negaverse versions of themselves. Ryan Hansen and Ken Marino do their Ryan Hansen/Ken Marino Shtick, and why shouldn't they? Max Greenfield (a.k.a. Schmidt on New Girl) and Tessa Thompson (from Dear White People and Creed) both had recurring roles long before they were famous, and even Tina Majorino (Mac) and Michael Muhney (Lamb), who didn't really "break out" in a major way after the show, are perfect in their roles. The second (SECOND) IMDb credit for one Jessica Chastain is an episode of Veronica Mars, and of course, Leighton Meester appears in two episodes. Yes, there are other teen shows that feature young actors who went on to bigger, better things, but I maintain that Veronica Mars is notable for encouraging real actors to do real work.

4. The Mysteries Were Smart AF

The show trusted its audience to keep up and pay attention. Maybe even a little too much. In the era before binge-watching and old episodes being able on demand, Veronica Mars suffered from the same issue that plagues the first few seasons of The X Files: Viewers who weren't "caught up" on the season-long mystery arc found it difficult to get into. VM had low ratings throughout its run, and when it used the shift from high school to college to introduce shorter, quicker mysteries, well, we all know how season three went. But looking back, it's clear that the show was ahead of its time, telling smart, twist-y weekly stories while teasing out a longer mystery that deeply impacted the main characters' lives. (Can't you just imagine how they'd advertise the show now? Moody teaser trailers with the tag line "Who Killed Lilly Kane?" and fansites and podcasts devoted to all the clues and hints and easter eggs from every episode?) There are other teen mystery/crime-fighter shows, sure, but they tend to put their characters in immediate peril, which makes the audience ask, "What's going to happen?" Instead, Veronica Mars is an intellectual exercise, evidence and theory based, and the question becomes, "What has already happened, and what does it mean?" That's the kind of meaty writing that inspires, if not legions of fans, a loyal audience to sing its praises. Veronica Mars was so smart it was niche. I'm not making a case for VM as overlooked prestige television, but then again I totally am. WHY didn't it win any Emmys?

5. They Didn't Explain Every Little Thing

See: above "trusting the audience smartness" factor. They didn't explain why sleeping with a "consenting" teenager is still wrong, or why Logan and Veronica went from adversaries to lovers in the space of like, a week, or why money equals power. They got that the audience got it. So, the exact opposite of a show like, say, Secret Life of the American Teenager. There were episodes that touched on privilege and entitlement and infidelity and the abuse of power by law enforcement, but it was subtle and real instead of, you know...Degrassi.

6. The Humor

It wasn't dark and humorous, it was darkly humorous and humorously dark. (Think combining the creepy weirdness of Twin Peaks with the banter of Moonlighting.) Logan's poignant answering machine messages, Veronica's epic takedowns, even Lamb got to be withering and snarky while he systematically fucked over the whole town.The humor kept us invested even when stories dipped into sentimental, Dawson's Creek-esque territory and deflected the romance-y moments that might have turned it into a mystery-style Felicity. Veronica's and Logan's jokes, in particular, also serve a psychological purpose: mask their pain at any cost. Unlike in Gilmore Girls, where every character speaks like a hyper-intelligent stand-up comic and not at all like a teenager or real human being, Veronica and the residents of Neptune make comments that feel true to their characters and relevant to their circumstances. If you watched any episode of Scream Queens and thought, "I guess they're trying to imitate...Scream? Heathers? Clueless? With the smart/bitchy blondes and the snappy comebacks and the eye rolls?" I understand. But actually, they were trying (and failing. Hard.) to do Veronica Mars. Smart sassy cute mean heart of gold flirty clever repartee? Yeah, that's Veronica Mars, and Ryan Murphy, bless his soul, is not Rob Thomas.

7. The Rape Plot(s)

From the very first episode when, in a flashback, golden-haired, white dress-clad Veronica walks, almost in a stupor (have you ever seen a more "perfect" victim?) into the sheriff's office to tell Lamb that she was raped—because she is a good girl and good girls go to the authorities—only to have him, basically, shrug it off, rape and sexual assault were core themes of the show, central to its purpose and story engine. Creator Rob Thomas initially envisioned the story as a YA novel with a male protagonist, and changing the lead's gender to female is arguably the best and most important decision he ever made. Veronica's sexuality is everything. How she flirts her way out of scrapes, plays innocent when it can help her, distrusts it when she's attracted to the "wrong" person, is allowed to enjoy it with Logan and, of course, how her virginity was taken from her one night she can't quite remember. The show takes Veronica's rape seriously as not just a plot point or easy motivation, but as a defining part of her character. She cleans obsessively and looks over her shoulder. She's sensitive to the potential aggressors—and victims—at her school. She knows that her rapist was someone she knew, and she has to live with that mystery every day. But it's complicated. That night she can't remember might have been semi-consensual, but then we learn, no it wasn't. Yes, there's a story about a false rape accusation (against Adam Scott!), but the truth only makes the situation murkier. And in an unfortunately rare move, Veronica Mars also depicts the aftermath of the sexual abuse of boys, including an exploration of how the stigma against male assault survivors re-traumatizes them. (The third season is, in my opinion, a missed opportunity to tackle the campus rape epidemic. By blaming the rapes on a psychological experiment gone awry, the show unfortunately ignores the fact that toxic masculinity isn't a role-playing aberration but a pervasive national issue. But its heart is in the right place, if not its logic.)

8. Veronica

Choker-wearing, dog-owning, private-detectiving blonde badass Veronica Mars. She's most often compared to Buffy, that other crime-fighting cutie with a ragtag army of friends and a ne'er do well love interest, and the comparison is apt. Both possess skills their peers do not and use those skills to solve problems both thrust upon them and sought. But the difference is that in the space that Buffy uses to explore the supernatural, Veronica Mars plays with loyalty and ethics. Is it wrong to snitch on your friends? Is a rumor evidence? Can you break the law to serve a higher good? These are issues Buffy doesn't wrestle with; it's pretty much a given that evil vampires are worth defeating (yes, there are definitely instances when Buffy is tested because she's fallen for a vamp or one of her friends is possessed or whatever, but that's not like, the thing of the show). And while so many other "outsider/observer/new kid" teen show protagonists (Ryan, Dan, Dawson, Lindsay Weir) long to get "in," Veronica's been there. She's been popular, and (a little) wealthy. She's not exploring a new world, she's re-learning her old one. In that she has more in common with Angela Chase, but way less whiny. You watch My So-Called Life and think, I'm totally Angela. You watch VMand think, I wish I were Veronica. When people talk about the strong but vulnerable but smart but flawed but cool but real but beautiful but relatable but empowered but conflicted but modern but iconic but a good role model but not unattainable with a job not defined by that job "interesting" female characters on television, a few names tend to come up again and again: Carrie, Murphy, Ally, Roseanne, Olivia, Dana. To that (very white!) pantheon I humbly submit: Veronica.

*....except for Freaks and Geeks.

[cntcrtainmcnt-blog]

Okay I got a bunch of new characters(someone stop me please!!!) so here are their intros! I would love to plot for them so please like that post or just come screaming at me!

BRYAN ACKERMAN looks an awful lot like CHRIS WOOD. HE is TWENTY-SEVEN and while they're SWEET, they have a tendency to get pretty GOOFY. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to I MISS YOU by BLINK 182. 

SUICIDE TW

Only child, born in Kola, at a young age he was already a big fan of football. Like that’s all he ever wanted. Nothing else mattered except that, although he did have a teeny tiny small geeky side. He just dedicated his life to the sport.

Younger, he used to be a nice kid, never said or done anything wrong, but then when he started high school, he realized all the cool kids were a bit meaner? And since he was a football player, it was kinda expected from him to stay popular or the guys on the team would start kinda hating him? So her started changing himself to fit in.

In sophomore year, he started dating another of the popular girls. It lasted until middle of senior year, and during all those years, her life just became worse and worse, but since he was so focused on sports, he never realized it. She wasn’t happy, and even with how much he loved her, it didn’t help save her. She committed suicide on the night of February 21.

That, obviously, destroyed him. He started losing focus, his grades dropped, and he was getting threatened he wouldn’t get a football scholarship. So just for that, he pulled through. But he was sad, and he just wished he’d paid more attention to the signs, but he was too self-centred for that. So he dropped the façade. He tried to just... become the nice kid he used to be again. People thought it was just his way of dealing with and he’d go back to “normal” sooner or later. But they never knew what really became of him because after graduating, he got his scholarship in Houston and left right away.

HE HATED HIS MAJOR(social sciences) but except football, nothing interested him? So he just continued because he had to be studying to be on the team.

But in his third year, he got an injury that left him in a hospital bed for a few weeks. When he came back, it just looked like he lost some of his skills. They were giving him less play time, and he was more often on the bench than anything. So after his third year, he just left. It was heartbreaking, but he couldn’t stand being sat on the bench all game, he’d rather just not be on a team at all.

So then started his long struggle to find a job. Since he never graduated college, he didn’t have a degree, so he couldn’t be hired in that field. So he just took on some small jobs, moved from city to city because maybe if he travelled a bit he’d find something he liked? But really, he didn’t, and he just ended up back in Kola. 

He got a job, waiting in a small dinner, about a year and a half ago. But now he does both waiting jobs, but some nights he’s also a singer on stage.

CATHERINE WOLFE looks an awful lot like LEIGHTON MEESTER. SHE is THIRTY-ONE and while they're METICULOUS, they have a tendency to get pretty DESPERATE. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to I’M A MESS by BEBE REXHA.

Older of two girls, Catherine was always competitive with her sister, even if they were 4 years apart. She wanted to be the heiress of their dad’s company, she believed it was a right for her since she was older.

But she was always in competition with other girls at school. She wanted the best grades, the best clothes, the best friends, everything.

But it wasn’t enough, her sister still surpassed her, and she was the one to have the reins of the company.

That was the one thing Cathy wanted more than anything, but she couldn’t have it. She decided not to throw a tantrum about it(although she probably did in private, with her friends) and just tried to find a career path. She was good with social events, she had quite a lot of money, and her social network was incredible. So she just started hosting events to help different organizations. And that’s all she’s been doing, but she does A LOT of those. 

CECELIA ROSE looks an awful lot like SHAILENE WOODLEY. SHE is TWENTY-SIX and while they're CREATIVE, they have a tendency to get pretty FRIVOLOUS. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to BOULEVARD OF BROKEN DREAMS by GREEN DAY.

Okay so as a kid, Cece was always super creative, and she had amazing writing skills. She’d write stories and her parents would just be amazed by all of that.

They started sending her short stories to magazines, some got published, some didn’t, but she always had positive feedbacks about those.

She was only 16 when she published her first novel. AND BOY WAS IT POPULAR! Sure, she finished high school(she was still in junior year at that time) but already she had colleges fighting for her, and internships propositions. One of those, she just couldn’t say no to.

So right after high school, she became an intern to a famous author, one that already had countless books to their name. But it wasn’t what she expected. It was so much pressure, so much negative feedback, her writing got worse and worse. By the time she left, nothing she published made any wave, barely even selling anything. 

It was hard for her, and with what money she made, Cece left Philadelphia and started travelling around the world. She still took some notes down, but she was mostly focused on finding herself. That... honestly didn’t really work, by the time she got back to the States, she already had enough drabbles to write a few stories.

So she started writing again, but instead of going back to Philadelphia, she stayed in the South, in Kola, hoping maybe it would help her become the writer she once was again.

ELYSIA VAN HASSELT looks an awful lot like TAISSA FARMIGA. SHE is TWENTY-THREE and while they're INDEPENDENT, they have a tendency to get pretty BITTER. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to THE ONLY EXCEPTION by PARAMORE.

Her family is Dutch, her grandparents moving to Kola in their early 20s. They were friends, and moved next to each other. With the story of how her parents fell in love, with them being friends the moment they were born, she always believed they were soulmates, and everyone had one somewhere.

So as a kid, she was super sweet, kinda shy even, but she really tried her best to go to others because she still loved meeting new people, it was just hard for her to do the first steps.

She did amazing in school, and honestly she was really happy with her life and Ezra. Probs believed she found her soulmate just like her parents did.

But then he left, and it broke her heart. She distanced herself from people, claiming love didn’t exist and just became an overall meaner and bitter person.

She never went to college, her heart not in it anymore, and just started working in a music/film shop. She probs spends more time listening to music and watching movies in her room than outside.

FLORENCE KNEEN looks an awful lot like MADELAINE PETSCH. SHE is TWENTY-TWO and while they're OUTGOING, they have a tendency to get pretty DEFENSIVE. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to BREAKAWAY by KELLY CLARKSON.

Grew up poor, in a small town of Nevada, but had big dreams. Her parents actually didn’t want to crush her childhood dreams of becoming a big name in Hollywood, they just encouraged her smh.

So her original plan was to become an actress, but after staring in a few school productions, she realized maybe that’s not what she wanted? Instead, she started working backstage, and that’s where her true love was.

Even if they were poor, she always loved to be dressed nicely so she shopped in the best cheap spots and even if it was no big brands, in her small town, it looked super fancy.

But then she got a scholarship to go study film directing in Kola and she just looked like she was wearing cheap clothes all the time.

BUT SHE DIDN’T CARE BECAUSE SHE WAS DOING WHAT SHE LOVED. Throughout her studies, she produced a few short films, which were all pretty good and loved by everyone. Now that she’s graduated, she’s trying to become famous, trying to get more of her movies approved and shit.

Has no intention of ever going back to Nevada.

LIONEL RUBIO looks an awful lot like OSCAR ISAAC. HE is FORTY and while they're HARDWORKING, they have a tendency to get pretty UNDISCIPLINED. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to BELIEVER by IMAGINE DRAGONS. 

Lionel was the youngest of three child. He had a brother(10 years older) and a sister(4years older). And both of the youngest were kinda scared of the oldest, since he was a lot ruder and more violent, ya know?

But Lionel was close to his sister, and she genuinely loved playing with him as a kid even if they were 4 years apart.

But then when he was 10, he kinda always had the feeling his brother was dipping in something illegal? And he was right. Their parents were gone for the weekend, so he’d been asked to watch over his siblings. But really he just brought a bunch of scary looking dudes with guns and what his 10-year-old mind thought was bags of sugar. But obvs it wasn’t.

His sister discreetly made her way to his room, and convinced him to sneak out(since he was smaller, he had less chances of getting caught) and go to the neighbour to call the cops. So he did, while she was trying to distract the men. So at 10 years, he got his brother arrested.

Then he just contemplated becoming a cop. Because the ones who came were really nice to him and they told him all those pretty words about how brave he and his sister were. So he just became a cop.

Skip a few years, he’s got a few issues following orders at times, but he’s probs the best cop they have in the station. He got approached then by the FBI and just... went for it. He still has troubles with orders at times, but he just puts his life on the line every single time, probs gets hurt a lot too.

PHILIP MCGEE looks an awful lot like DACRE MONTGOMERY. HE is TWENTY-THREE and while they're CARING, they have a tendency to get pretty VIOLENT. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to DNA by LIA MARIE JOHNSON. 

ABUSE TW

Say hi to my broken boy Philip. He grew up in an abusive home, although it used to be only towards his mother. His dad was violent, but he never realized it was wrong because he was a kid and his mom pretended it was fine.

But then his mom left when he was 12, not saying anything, she was just gone. So his dad turned his anger on him, claiming he was worthless and all their problems were because of him. It was only verbal at first, but when he was 15, he started showing to school with some bruises(although he tried to cover them, or just said he was clumsy and fell in the stairs.)

People were suspicious, but honestly no investigation lead to anything, until he was 18. It was then that he finally confessed everything, and his dad was taken away. The reason: he himself got angry and punched a wall, and he got scared if it would go on like that, he’d turn just like his dad.

So now that his dad was gone, Philip was finally free to do what he wanted, and travel, which is something he was never allowed to(he never step foot outside his town before then).

He travelled a lot across the States, even some part of Canada, before settling in Kola 2 years ago. Because he enrolled in college there, in criminality.

Now he lives in dorms, and has a part time job. He still has some anger issues but he tries to control them because he’s actually the sweetest dude you’ve ever met.

[brown-dorgs]

In 1993 Daniel Belkin Ph.D. gave a seminar at the Saluki Club of America National Specialty in Lexington, Kentucky which was taped and edited for publication (Clarke and Belkin, Field Advisory News, Nov./Dec., 1993, pp.26-36). During his seminar, “The Functional Saluki: Lessons from the Coursing Field”, Dr. Belkin makes several points that also have enduring relevance to preserving our wonderful breed. Though there is much to question and argue with in the transcript, there is also much to remember.

The seminar opened with the assertion that “things you cannot see are more important than things you can”. Dr. Belkin goes on to discuss the selection for beautiful eyes versus selecting for visual acuity. “Any kind of animal that is not being selected for its eyesight over a long period of time will lose this genetic information through random 8 mutation and will thus lose the ability to see…. If we just breed Salukis to have pretty eyes in the show ring, soon they won‟t even be able to see their quarry, let alone chase it”. In this vein, there is a wonderful quotation from R. Leighton‟s July 21st 1923 Morning Post in the Watkins‟ book which describes just how superbly Eastern hounds could see:

Several other important comments fall under this main point, with the additional caution that “breeding to the standard will not preserve function”. For example, Dr. Belkin points out that “the standard says nothing whatsoever about the most important aspect of the head: what‟s inside it”. He goes on to describe a great coursing Saluki whose record in competition was formidable because he never made a mistake in his guess which direction the hare would take to escape and he was always right there to kill it.

He also discusses lung capacity, stating that “the important thing about the lung is oxygen diffusing capacity: how fast the animal can get oxygen from the air to the blood stream and to the cells…. A Saluki needs a lung that works efficiently. The heart should pump just enough blood to work properly with the lungs…. I think Salukis have tremendous aerobic reserve capacity”. Referring to bones, Belkin states that the most important thing about bones is that they shouldn‟t break. He says there is a genetic component to bone strength, but that when bones are stressed their internal structure changes. “Dogs which are worked have stronger bones”.

Angulation, according to Dr. Belkin, “is a matter of posture, not structure”. He also discusses the phrase “hocks low to the ground”, and concludes that its use in the Saluki standard is “a mistake”, a carry over from the horse term “hocks well let down”, but not applicable to dog conformation. Though the transcript is full of interesting anecdotes and experiences, Dr. Belkin concludes with the same assertion that he opened with: “if you don‟t select for something, you are going to lose it….That‟s the way selection works. That‟s the way genetics works. ANY CHARACTERISTIC WHICH IS NOT ACTIVELY SELECTED FOR WILL DEGENERATE. It will go away. That‟s true throughout the animal kingdom and is true for our dogs as well” (original emphasis).

Dan Belkin‟s thought provoking comments, reflections and memories of his lifetime coursing, observing and loving Salukis, impress upon us just what a responsibility it is to be the keepers of such an ancient and durable and athletic hound. But, unless we respect both our breed‟s history and original function, we can‟t preserve it.

The Saluki Standard: In The Beginning

[yottiemcgottie]

Key Changes

I spent the past year, most recently the past few months with a smug and self-satisfied attitude about one of my greatest accomplishments in life so far: becoming friends with Freddy Leighton. How did I, someone who had had such trouble assimilating to DC, get so lucky to have found a soulmate here? Someone who appreciated and loved every big and little thing about me as much as I did them? How did someone like me, who is friendly and kind, but extremely reserved toward new people, end up falling mutually in love with this person so incredibly fast? Is it even possible that I could be so accepted and admired by someone without having to sift through months, years of unfolding? This friendship gifted me with the rare ability to feel completely at home within myself, completely free to be myself without questioning a single thing or wondering where I stood. You did that on purpose, didn’t you Freddy? You did things immediately without any sort of planned out process. You put yourself out there, and I picked up what you were puttin down. I was so ready for it. You gave me love and harmony without me having to work for it. I got a warm, tight embrace of the soul from the first smile I saw of yours and the first conversation, and of course from the first dance moves. I knew that I loved you the minute I met you, I just didn’t know how deeply.

I’ve been arrogant in my head (maybe outwardly too, who knows) about how fortunate I am to have been brought closely into your life so quickly. It’s because I’m very insecure about my place in the DC community that I find myself in 2.5 years after moving here. A place that I grew up but that was so very hard to come back to, almost like it wasn’t home anymore at all. A place where it’s easy to have many acquaintances but near impossible to make fast friends that you stay close with. Why is that so? Well, it didn’t really matter anymore when you had Freddy in your life. He brought everything floating around in the air of our troubled minds back to earth. He constantly reminded you of the good in life, because he was so, so good. He was therapeutic to be around. I congratulated myself for being in the right place at the right time in order for us to meet. I met someone who lives and breathes music the way I do, that bonded with me over our shared tastes the way parents bond over a newborn baby. I can’t listen to music when I’m alone right now.

Without fully realizing it (but yes, actually very much being conscious of this), I thought you know what, with all of the emptiness I feel in this social scene and the DC material-focused, competitive life, what actually matters most to me (along with some other important things of course) is that I have Freddy. Freddy was home. Freddy was an anchor. A constant beam of infectious joy no matter what was happening in his own life. He was a happiness disease that I was ready to be plagued by every single day. Time, the universe, life, the spirit world, God, whatever, had given me a gift that sustained me in a time and place that I do struggle with (another story). I counted my blessings. I am rather broken inside and I’m healing, slowly, from a lot of pain. He made it worth it. He knew that I felt that way.

I told him all the time about how I felt because I didn’t hold anything back from him. We were constantly swimming in the same lane, on the same page, riding the same wave, vibing on the exact same philosophies of life and greater truths we wanted to experience. Let alone sharing both of our first loves, music. He gave me the urge to go forth in JOY and fun when oftentimes it’s easier to let bitterness, cynicism, and depression lead the way. I felt so sure about my life with Freddy now in it, as of September/October 2018. Finally, I was able to rest! I had true love.

I can’t even be angry at him for disappearing. I can only feel empty. I can only feel that half of my heart that’s gone and the hope that I had for my future staying in DC and actually being happy here evaporate. My anchor has detached. This may seem like a lot of weight to put on one person. But he knew he meant that much to me, he knew that I felt like I found pure gold in a barren land. He felt like he had found it in me too. That has been one of the greatest honors I’ll ever know and that I’ll continue to wear like a medal. I have pride from my love.

All one has to do is look at one of the many photos and videos of Freddy laughing, singing, dancing, petting cats, rapping, making up jokes, wearing wigs, smiling that up-to-no-good grin, dancing in the street, Facetiming… to know how special he was. I’ve really lost something rare that can’t be replaced. There can never be another person as sweet, funny, open-minded, creative, gentle, patient, positive, silly, expressive, down for the count, honest or real as Freddy. He brought out the best in me every single time we spoke, interacted, or spent time together. It is still so unreal that I don’t have that best friend energy in my life, his texts in my phone, his funny or musical videos in my Instagram direct messages, his facetime calls, his incredible ability to make even the most mundane situation into a joyous occasion. I don’t feel like I can ever really forgive Time for stopping short on him. He had given me everything and more, and he had so much more to give the world and all of us that loved him. But I got one year. If I had never gotten this past year with him… I don’t even want to think about where I’d be. I don’t mean to be vague about my own happiness and why DC is hard. It’s a completely whole other topic about satisfaction, connection, loneliness, depression, growing pains, and so much more. Oh, and about people bringin’ too much BULLSHIT around. Freddy would know what I mean.

I don’t know how to move forward from this loss. I’m so scared of what’s to come. But it’s not about me, as much as it feels like it’s shattered my life. It’s about what Freddy gave this life: honoring that and living with his light still radiating down and around on all of us that knew him. What would he want from us? To retreat into our shells? To stop asking questions, to stop loving and dancing and creating? I can’t ever be you Freddy, I can’t ever replicate you, but I can live with your handprint on my heart forever, and I promise to never forget you or how you’ve made me feel. I promise to try to keep going. I promise to be as good of a friend to others as you were to me, no matter what they might be able to give back in return. I love you, and all I want for you since we can’t go back and erase what happened to you (though I’d kill to go back in time and save you), is for you to be in a place of eternal happiness. I want you to be in a place of joy that never ceases and for you to experience only bliss and peace. You deserve everything good in the world, and I hope that the next world, wherever that may be, gives you all that you’d ever hoped for in this one. I love you forever and ever and ever, my dear best friend Freddy.