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diazpoems · 3 years

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Me watching Riverdale S2:

THE WAY KEVIN IS RAISING HIS HAND TO THE MOTHERFUCKING SKY WHEN HIRAM ASKS FOR A VOLUNTEER FOR A WRESTLING DEMONSTRATION. THIS THIRSTY MOTHERFUCKER. HIS FACE IS PRICELESS.

I wish I could just jump into Riverdale and shake the characters and be like

Cheryl: Your parents fucking suck

Josie: Your parents fucking suck

Veronica: Your parents fucking suck

Betty: Your parents fucking suck

Archie: Your dads okay so far, I don’t know about your mom

Jughead: Your dad used to fucking suck but as a person, at his core, I don’t think he’s evil, and he’s getting better, but he’s got a ways to learn. I don’t know about your mom

Kevin: Your dad’s decent so far? Don’t know about your mom

Like especially Josie because I know it’s hard and that a lot of the trauma her mom felt probably manifested itself badly and Josie probably feels attached to her mom and like she owes her being a good daughter because her mom’s had it bad but like I also DON’T CARE. FUCKING TREAT YOUR CHILD RIGHT. I DON’T GIVE A SHIT WHAT HAPPENED. THATS YOUR CHILD. WOMAN UP AND BE A FUCKING DECENT PERSON. I DON’T CARE THAT YOU PUT A ROOF OVER HER HEAD, FOOD IN HER MOUTH, GAVE HER A SINGING CAREER (But continue to control it and not give her leeway to think and act on her own). SHE DON’T OWE YOU SHIT. FUCK OFF WITH YOUR WEIRD LIFE-FUCKING-SUCKED-FOR-ME-BUT-IM-ALSO-A-CLASSIST-BITCH PARADOX. MY DAD’S GOT IT MADE RIGHT NOW BUT HE HASN’T FORGOTTEN HIS ROOTS, HASN’T FORGOTTEN THE DISCRIMINATION HE FACED AND THE FACT THAT HE GREW UP SHIT POOR EARLY ON AND HE HASN’T DECIDED “Hey, let’s ridicule people for being in a similar position that I was in!”

Basically, this is me begging for for Josie’s mom to ✨fucking do better✨

Anyways yeah normalize Riverdale characters disowning their own parents ✌🏽🥰

Hmmm. If I wasn’t completely and utterly for the Serpents before, the white serpents learning to shut the fuck up and stand with Toni and her grandfather in opposition of the genocide and colonialism that was perpetrated by Cheryl’s great great grandfather? Hell fucking yeah

Dude I’m sorta crying at the scene with Hiram seeing Veronica in her confirmation dress because he’s a piece of shit but this is how it goes down, like it’s a whole thing

I love that I immediately knew the meaning of “Catholic chic”. Apparently that’s all going to church every Sunday for the formative years of my life accomplished

I hope Penelope Blossom dies in a fire :)

OH MY GOD, LOVE SIMON CAME OUT RIGHT AROUND HERE, KEVIN IS ASKING MOOSE TO IT, MY COMFORT MOVIE OH MY GOD-

Ugh, I don’t trust Midge. Something about the tropey-ness of her being The Girlfriend™️ and her face, as well as the fact that she played Gen in tatbilb, something doesn’t sit right. The haircut feels too manic pixie, like she’s hiding something. Bad vibes

NOOO CHERYL ILL GO ON A VACATION WITH YOU 😭 GOD IM SO GONE FOR HER

Aaaaand she did some fuck shit. Aaaand Toni is pretty. Aaaand there’s the internalized homophobia.

Jughead saying that growing up Betty’s and Archie’s windows being parallel always bothered him sounds more like a jarchie admission than a bughead one, I’m just sayin’

BETTY AND JUGHEAD’S REACTIONS WHEN THEY HEAR THE BED SQUEAKING IS ME. Like the little amused but lowkey confused and baffled expression on his face as he’s like “is that their solution to everything? Can’t they ever just talk?” Like no apparently not. Me too Jug, me too-

Idk Vee, maybe he’s asking questions about your father’s line of work and the business of his associates because your dad and mom are fucking evil

What the fuck Veronica. I mean yay because that just gets us closer to Jarchie kiss but like what the fuck Vee. Also Jughead is super cute, like why does the blue eyes black hair thing absolutely melt my weak heart, like I didn’t choose to fall for this pasty ass white boy but here we are. Also Veronica’s eyes are really big and dark and pretty like girl help im falling for these two-

BETTY LITERALLY POINTED IT OUT, C’MON NOW CW, I KNOW WE’VE MADE THE MISTAKE OF GROVELING WITH SPN BUT PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU WE NEED A JARCHIE KISS-

CAN HETEROSEXUALS PLEASE STOP FUCKING ALL THE TIME ON TV. WHY DO YOU HAVE TO SHOVE YOUR STRAIGHTNESS IN MY FACE. NOT EVERYONE IS STRAIGHT YOU KNOW.

“Entertain Jughead” 😏

DUDE. They were sitting ALONE. TOGETHER. In the WOODS. With them being the ONLY ones who haven’t kissed. DUDE.

C’MON MAN, THEY’RE STARING FUCKING LONGINGLY AT EACH OTHER

If there are weird gay ships for straights then Jeronica is the weird straight ship for gays

Ok so is there a legitimate reason why Veronica is faithful to her parents and defends them to a tee and partakes in their mob shit or is she just daddy’s little fucking girl. Like it isn’t her fault that she’s been manipulated but it pisses me the fuck off. And people who want her to stay with her parents because supposedly they’re the only ones who love her even though it’s toxic and warped? Like do you have a brain?

Archie and Veronica really love supporting gentrification, classism, and Vee’s rich daddy and mommy’s innocence huh

Look i actually agree with Reggie for once, get Hiram’s ass, deal with it Veronica

Wow, nice, shaming Jug for eating. That’s cool, Arch. That’s awesome. And no Betty, she doesn’t have everybody’s vote. Because Veronica’s parents are motherfuckers and when it comes to choosing between a murderer/abuser/rich/classist/gentrifying fuck and supporting your bestie uwu guess which one im fucking picking. Also, THANK YOU JUG for explaining to your friend that even though he lives in a fantasy land where northside Riverdale is the only one worth referring to when talking about Riverdale at all and thus the only one that matters and is worth protecting, the southside exists and people live and have grown up in the southside and building a prison there where it will be even more easy to profile and incarcerate southside residents under false or exaggerated pretenses ISN’T A GOOD THING. That his own friend isn’t quite apart of his and Veronica’s and Betty’s socioeconomic caste and that he’s not going to pretend like he is, he isn’t going to be quiet about it just because you’re friends again. That he’s not going to lay down and let Archie explain what a good move for Riverdale is when he clearly means northside riverdale, let him explain how the southside needs to be dealt with to someone who grew up on the southside and knows it more (not the most, I’m not saying Jug isn’t out of his depth with certain aspects of being a full southsider) intricately than him. LIKE FUCK. ARCHIE. WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU’RE TALKING TO. Like he just doesn’t get why building prisons and stereotyping and condemning all southsiders and gentrifying entire neighborhoods is really fucking bad and a big deal and it annoys me so much. Like yeah Arch, obviously you don’t see the big deal because it doesn’t affect you and you delude yourself that it doesn’t affect your friend either, but it actually is that bad.

In conclusion, Archie and Veronica and sometimes Betty are giving me headaches rn. Like I’m not saying Jughead is perfect at all but in this particular instance he’s the only one I agree with for the most part right now.

Yeah Arch, you see things differently because you’re not the one who’s on the receiving end of the problem

YES MOMMA ANDREWS. SNAP! GO FERAL! SHOW THAT SOB SOME CONSEQUENCES!

Ah, so this is the jarchie “break-up” scene. You know what. I feel no heartbreak. Get his ass Jug.

Get. His. Ass.

They sent Cheryl to a conversion institution. I’m literally crying. This isn’t an exaggeration. I feel like I want to cry. Just. God fucking damn it.

SHE DOESN’T WANT TO GET BETTER. SHE’S NOT SICK. YOU ARE. DIE. FUCKING DIE. BURN IN HELL. AND PENELOPE BLOSSOM TOO.

“That’s not how things go in Riverdale” is a veiled way of saying “don’t challenge the upper class and don’t try to stifle gentrification,” I hope you all know

#she speaks #riverdale #cheryl blossom #josie mccoy #veronica lodge #betty cooper #archie andrews #jughead jones #sierra mccoy #you know how spn and merlin fans have that one tag?#u kno the one #john winchester’s a+ parenting #uther pendragon’s a+ parenting #petition to use the same thing when a riverdale parent does something shitty and manipulative to their kid #sierra mccoy’s a+ parenting

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pricechecktranslations · 5 years

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TTDS: The Three Daughters of Sir Torture; Chapter 1

Torture Tower Doesn’t Sleep: The Three Daughters of Sir Torture infomine under the cut

Character Info:

Benjii Kenpu (Benji Kemp): A regular of Stella’s bar. Wears glasses, and evidently works as a doctor. Doesn’t pay his tab.

Chenbaren (Chamberlain): Not a person but a wealthy family in Lion City.

Hanku Fieron kyou (Sir Hank Fieron): The popularly-called “Sir Torture”. Used to live in Torcia Tower. There are lots of books and plays based on him, as he was (in addition to being a torturer of war prisoners) a famous war hero. He apparently died midway through responding to a summons by the king, traveling there by boat (as in, fell from the boat).

Jibetto (Gibbet): Is a regular of Stella’s bar. Appears younger than Lloyd, but carries herself with a very mature air.

Rakku (Rack): Very childish. Has a short haircut.

Ransuroodo Haaku (Lancelord Hark): A fictional hero based on Hank.

Reimondo (Raymond): A street performer. Friendly. Apparently looks a little like Zepeto.

Roido Rooweru (Lloyd Lowell): A thief who fancies himself an attractive (to women) sophisticate, smarter than the average thug and talented with firearms. Normally works alone, and looks out for himself only. Not from Lion City. Has a favored pistol he keeps on his person. Close to his thirties (was shy of 10 years old when Hank died). Has plans to get back to the capital someday, and for that he needs money. He also originally wanted to be an actor, and as such has some knowledge of theater (and once played Romarius in a play). He doesn’t like talking about his past. Has trained himself to be able to see a little in the dark. Has killed six people in the course of his work as a thief.

Sutera Taunsendo (Stella Townsend): The owner of Stella’s Bar. Young, and has red hair that’s tied up at the back. She’s just scraping by herself as it is, her father unable to walk after his legs were injured and unable to hire any help.

Zepetto (Zepeto?): A member of Lloyd’s temporary team that betrayed them to the police. Apparently Raymond looks a little like him.

Setting Info:

Basuzu no tsufu(?lots of readings for this) (Pot of Basuzu): Could be written as Baths but I think it’s a pun on Pazuzu from the Exorcist. A pot that belonged to Beritoad. Has four silver handles, and is always full of water, according to Gibbet. Legend says all who drink it are cured of their ills, and gain eternal life.

Josephiinu (Josephine): The name of Rack’s torture device. Basically a rack.

Rionshiti (Lion City): East from Lloyd’s hometown. A city in the sticks, without much police presence. In an economic downturn.

(Sutera no sakaba) Stella’s Bar: A bar located in Lion City’s downtown. The sign has a bottle and drinking glass on it. It has 3 four person tables and 5 seats at the counter. There’s a bunch of glasses behind the counter, as well as something large and bell-shaped that’s covered in black cloth (a bird cage, probably). Originally, the sign read “Townsend’s Bar”, but Stella figured having a woman’s name would bring in more male customers.

Touruchiatou (Torcia Tower): Five stories tall, grey, old. Hank Fieron used to live there until 20 years ago. Supposedly empty since his death, but recently his daughters have suddenly started living there. Said to hold the “Pot of Basuzu” on its top floor. No windows below the third floor. First floor is divided into several rooms. There is an atrium on the second floor that lets in light from the third floor. The second floor is just one big room. The third floor is where the torturing happens. Fourth floor is nothing but jail cells.

Yookushiti (York City): West from Lloyd’s hometown. A city in the sticks, without much police presence (same as Lion City).

Youma (Wraith): A sort of demonic entity with strange powers. Rare, and not widely believed in anymore. Beritoad is an evil wraith, and Romarius is a good one—at least, so the stories say.

Notable quotes (admittedly I wasn’t looking too hard for them, I could probably find more, but this one stuck out to me at least):

Lloyd: (in thought, scene 1) I have real ability. I have top-grade skill with firearms, intelligence far above that of a common thug, and looks and wit that would make almost any woman weak at the knees! There was no need for someone so superior as I to rely on the assistance of such incompetents!

Plot Summary:

Scene 1

It opens on Lloyd walking through the street at midnight, getting the impression that someone is looking at him from Torcia tower’s third window. He dismisses it, hurrying along as he’s on the run from a “job” (burglar, I think) gone bad thanks to Zepeto (?). He rages over the whole thing a little (though usually a loner the last job was pretty intimidating, so he’d gotten help).

Eventually he reaches a fork in the road, the sign telling him that the right path leads to Lion City’s downtown. He realizes he’s been going in the wrong direction, having intended to go to York City instead, but figures this is just as well.

He wants to get some food, but all of the money he had squirreled away in his hideout was seized by the police.

Scene 2

All the shops and such are dark, being midnight. Lloyd doesn’t have much money on him for good accommodations. Eventually he finds Stella’s Bar still open. He goes inside, intending to take the opportunity to learn more about Lion City.

He’s greeted by Stella, who is the only person inside save for Benji, who soon decides to leave. Stella banters with him a little about his tab before he runs off, and invites Lloyd to sit down. They chat a little. He mentions looking for work.

Apparently the town has fallen on hard times recently (she mentions something called the “daiya keshiki” (diamond scenery I think? I’m not…sure what that means) relating to when the place was prosperous, talking about her own problems with her father and whatnot. She suggests the Chamberlain family might hire him (though they’re having their own troubles), but there’s also Torcia Tower.

They talk a little about Hank and his three daughters. Stella makes clear that they are very rich noble girls, basically (though she’s only met Gibbet). She thinks of it as they might hire him as a servant, but he decides he’s going to burgle them instead (though maybe try to get hired to scope the place out).

Gibbet suddenly enters. Though not well versed on women’s fashion, Lloyd can tell by looking at her that her dress is incredibly expensive.

There’s this nice kind of setup where Lloyd is clearly thinking of her as an easy mark (prey) when in reality he’s going to be prey to her. Anyway, he flirts with her a little (insulting the bar slightly in the process, but Stella doesn’t seem to mind), as a test of how she’ll react. She responds gracefully and happily, sitting next to him. Stella takes the bird cage behind the bar into the back when Gibbet looks at it.

She orders “Blood Grave” wine, the most expensive thing in the bar. Stella tells Gibbet they were talking about her, and Gibbet brings up how people have been spreading rumors of her and her sisters, as ruffians around town have gone missing since they showed up in Torcia Tower. Stella doesn’t believe they’re responsible.

Gibbet claims her sisters came to the tower to cure an illness where they can’t come into contact with sunlight (which is why only she leaves it). They talk about the “Pot of Basuzu” and wraiths and whatnot. She says her sisters are (briefly) cured of their ailment when they drink from the pot.

Lloyd resolves to steal the pot, as it’s obviously valuable. He tries to bring up the subject of being hired, but Gibbet brushes him off. She leaves, but says she’d like to drink with Lloyd again sometime. Stella takes pity on him and suggests an inn that he can stay at on credit for a month while he’s looking for work.

Scene 3

The inn is a bit run down (it doesn’t give a name for it). His room has two beds and little else (and is only really big enough for just those beds), and is sharing the room with Raymond. Raymond is friendly but Lloyd has no interest in making friends. Several days have gone by (it’s been a week since he arrived in town) and Raymond appears to have taken the hint.

While pretending to look for work, he visits Torcia Tower, receiving no answer when he rings the bell. There’s a new lock on the door, though Lloyd figures he can pick it easily. After ruminating on the job a little, Lloyd decides to try to break in that night.

Scene 4

The first floor of the tower is decently bright during the day due to having gaps in the stonework walls. It’s shabbier than Lloyd was expecting, with the front hall and the various rooms hardly feeling lived in, filled with old and smelly furniture. It’s also larger than he thought it would be. No sign that torture’s gone on here. He does find a pot of purplish red flowers that smell nice (Gibbet smelled like that earlier).

On to the second floor. It occurs to him that if he takes the pot of Basuzu, the “sick” sisters won’t be able to cure their illness, but he refuses to care for people he’s never even met. The light of the moon from the third floor comes in through the atrium, like a spotlight, and Lloyd is briefly reminded of his acting days.

Scene 5

He looks around the second floor a little, approaching some of the flowers from earlier. Suddenly the room is filled with light (all the lights come on at once?), and he sees that Gibbet is there in the center. She’s not scared to see him.

They banter a tiny bit, and then he pulls his gun on her. He tells her he’s here for the pot of Basuzu. She offers to give it to him and tell no one that he arrived—but Lloyd doesn’t like loose ends, and so says he’ll kill her anyway (though he’ll do it quickly to spare her pain).

Gibbet then acts confused on the matter of wanting to spare her pain—she says that pain is the greatest joy humans can feel, and starts laughing creepily.

Lloyd is caught—it’s a little hard for me to read exactly what happens (maybe I’m too tired reading this scene, and I don’t recognize the kanji. I’ll look over it again if anyone wants more detail). Something binds him and then hoists him into the air from the atrium (I think he’s in a cage?). Gibbet’s gone.

He realizes he’s been had, remembering what he’d heard about this place being a torture tower. The (cage????) that he’s in starts hurtling towards the ceiling in the third floor, and he loses consciousness right before hitting it.

Scene 6

He’s no longer in the cage thing when he wakes up. He’s laying prone on some weird rectangular box with gears and (a lever I think?), arms and legs aching from the collision with the ceiling and chained to the box. He’s able to look around, in some room in the tower with the same walls as the rest. There’s a large wooden double door further in.

Rack informs him he’s laying on Josephine. Lloyd recognizes her as the girl he saw looking at him from the window all those nights ago. He asks to be let go, and she goes to activate the rack. (Apparently this is her 63rd torture victim, if I’m reading this right?). The way the rack works is that when she spins the gears, it retracts the ropes that are tied to his limbs.

In agony, Lloyd begs for his life, but Rack just finds this funny (she’s very jovial with him, calling him “big brother” and such). He starts to pass out, and she stabs him with a large spike to keep him awake.

Basically, he gets horribly tortured.

Scene 7

Lloyd is eventually released from the device and locked in a cell on the tower’s fourth floor. There’s a young man there already, with stretched limbs covered in wounds. He tells Lloyd that the victims of torture are being used by the girls as sacrifices to appease their god, in order to bring their father back to life.

Maiden comes to bring them their food (so, she does talk—but is a girl of few words). The prisoner says they only feed them enough to keep them alive, and tells Lloyd who the other girls are.

Lloyd has no intention of dying there. He sees that the cell facing them has their effects in it, including his favored pistol. The other prisoner tells him that while many have tried to escape, all were killed. Lloyd has hope though—he doesn’t need to fight them, just not get caught. It’s difficult for him to work the lock due to his pain, but he manages to unlock the cell.

He gets his gun back, and then goes to get the other prisoner with him, rationalizing that he could sacrifice him to escape if need be. The prisoner gets something from his own effects, handing it to Lloyd and explaining it’s from when he used to work in a coal mine, and to use if push came to shove. Then they get going.

Scene 8

They reach the third floor. Several somethings fall from the ceiling—cylindrical metal lumps. They have lids, and look like coffins, but with protrusions that look like a woman’s face (these are iron maidens, pretty sure).

As Lloyd is wondering where the hell these fell from, the other guy starts freaking out, saying they’ve been caught. The maidens are apparently animate, as they float into the air and start attacking the two of them. Lloyd dodges, but the other man is hit and falls to the ground. Lloyd considers using what the man gave him, but figures the confines of the tower are too narrow.

The maiden sets down next to the man and opens up, revealing it’s full of spikes. His body is sucked inside. There’s no screams, but blood starts seeping out after a moment.

Lloyd leaps down the atrium hole to the second floor away from the maidens. One falls down after him. The second floor is bigger, however, and Lloyd brings out what the miner gave him, revealed to be dynamite.

Lloyd is caught in the blast and blown back. It also didn’t work on the maiden. Lloyd gets up, throws up (mostly blood), and falls back down again. Unable to stand, he tries crawling towards the exit, though his eyes have lost focus and he can hardly see.

The iron maiden drops in front of him. It opens to reveal Maiden inside. She gets out to look at him. From behind he hears Gibbet chide Maiden for overdoing it. Rack is with her. Gibbet says that they can’t just kill him—that’s not torture. And torture is to bring someone alive the pleasure of “agony”.

Lloyd intends to curse her as insane, but instead begs for her to let him go. She grabs him by the chin, wondering how he’d sound if she cut his pretty face. Lloyd asks her to spare his face. Gibbet has Rack stab his face with her spike instead.

Scene 9

One month passes. Stella goes to Benji’s hospital to see one of his patients, someone wrapped in bandages and near death. She’d found him three days ago when passing Torcia Tower, and he hasn’t woken up the whole time he’s been in the hospital. His face is pretty much ruined, so not only can they not recognize it, but they can’t imagine anyone else will either.

Raymond is performing in the town square. It’s been six months since he arrived in town, and he’s gotten a small following. At the end of this morning performance, people clap and throw money in his hat. As he’s resting and eating some pizza, he overhears some people gossiping about the person in the hospital and the Torcia Tower (like that it’s haunted, etc).

The narration says that no one knows the truth—Hank had no daughters. Only torture implements that he had loved like daughters.

Raymond muses on souls inhabiting torture devices. Then he stands and goes to perform his afternoon show.

#()torture tower doesn't sleep #it's actually a good read #shame it sounds so horrible summarized

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blurrymango · 5 years

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Chapter One

The air was salty and chilled, a sign that it was finally the beginning of fall. PoisonBerry clutched the journey in bony hands. There was something strange about this day, something overwhelming that loomed over the vessel of the ship like a cloud. The net that had been cast in the water came back up slowly. The crew watched with anticipation as it breached the surface. What they had pulled up was not fish nor treasure, but a body. With long brown hair and scarring burns covering what surface wasn’t covered in decay. The raven-haired girl felt to her sick to her stomach at the scene before, the nauseating smell and sight quickly overtook her, her body unable to handle it as she passed out.

Maybe in another timeline he would have cared, but by the sticky-notes she had covered the pages of his book with, it was obvious she had no idea who he was, no respect for the grave in which his thoughts at. And in the pale moonlight that shined through the small window on the wall, he realized that, as well as having no respect for him, she had no respect for herself either. Greasy and unkept short black hair mocked anyone who knew her. She used to take pride in herself, inner and outer. Those once delicate and slender hands that could make or break beautiful creations were now callused and shaky. He looked away, not wanting to see her in that state any longer.

Whoever had shared this before had long since left, as he hoped he would as well. He would have thrown on whatever of the person’s clothes fit comfortably, though with his stature he was reduced to choosing whatever wouldn’t slide off his awkward body. He absentmindedly wondered how easily he would be able to get his muscle and fat back up, knowing that until his skin wasn’t trying to heal itself over layers of decay he wouldn’t be able go back on testosterone. He sneered at the thought, grabbing an empty satchel and putting his journal and some money in it.

He figured that if he were to stay on the ship that he would be interrogated or if he managed to play dead that the male members of the crew would likely try to, well, make use of his corpse’s more feminine parts. He shivered at the thought, unable to tell if he feared the idea or got excited by it. Either way he did not want to find out which. He briefly considered taking PoisonBerry with him, but not only did she not remember who he was but frankly she might as well be dead if she didn’t remember him. Plus, he was a stranger to her, and though she was never quite smart, she had good instincts. He had always admired that about her.

He was about to get into a raft when he heard a gun cock and felt cool metal against the back of his head. He could hear it now, the unsteady and ragged breath of the person behind him. She never really liked the sea air, her asthma would always act up, as it was now by how it sounded. He cleared his throat.

“Th-the-the o-o-cea-ocean a-ai-air-r a-ain’t g-goo- ain’t g-good f-for ya lungs-s, girl.” He hated his stutter, it made him sound scared, but, really, he wasn’t really feeling emotions right now. His legs were tired from standing, his tongue sandpaper in his mouth, and his entire body was sore and nauseated.

“‘S-s-sides, if y-y-ya k-killed me, I b-b-bet-betcha’ th-that ya c-capt-tin beat y-you f-f-for it, make ya c-clean up my bl-blood and gut-ts.” The coolness of the gun left, and he turned to face her. Her features were etched with anger and fear, though her long nose scrunched up with disgust. Maybe it was the smell. But when he looked into her eyes, she looked away. Those once bright green eyes that he had once stared into with mutual admiration and respect could now barely stand to look back at him. She was afraid.

“Just return what st-stole and you can leave.” She held out her hand for the item.

“Th-th-the b-bah-bag ain’t-t yours, b-b-babe.” He needed to get on land quickly, else he was going to throw up his guts into the sea.

“I’m talking about the journal.” She sneered at him. He could handle an angry PoisonBerry, and he knew had to act fast or do what she wants, or things would get violent.

“J-j-jus-jus’ t-t-takin’ back what’s-s m-mine br-bro.” His instincts acted and then the gun was in his hand and aimed straight at her head before she could register what happened.

“Y-y-y’know wh-what-t, s-s-s-since you s-so rude to your g-guest, you c-c-can t-take me to the Av-v-v-vante docks or y-you-you’ll get a f-fuck-fucking b-bull-let in ya s-sk-skull.” She was no longer rude.

It would have been silent if not for the gentle waves around them. Blitz was looking directly at PoisonBerry, studying the rowing girl with scrutinizing eyes. She used to be so different, she was so confident, hard-headed and energetic. She used to give off an air of easy-going superiority that made anyone relaxed. The person in front of him was merely a pitiful disgrace in her body, if there was a way to get rid of this thing that possessed her and bring back his friend, he would take any opportunity he got. He hated how different she was now, and it showed.

“So, uh-“

“Sh-sh-sut-shut the f-f-fuck up, p-pl-please. I-I-I’m n-not in the m-mood to t-t-talk.” The rest of the it was spent in grateful silence.

When the two arrived at the town, the sun had barely risen, yet society was already awake. The mere idea of waking up this early disgusted them both and angered Blitz, but that meant stores were open. Which meant food, and though the thought of eating nauseated him, he was hungry, and he knew just where to eat at.

He walked with a purpose, if anger could be considered one. It certainly would have been a sight to see, a corpse walking with a girl so skinny she was a skeleton, both wore ill-fitted clothing. Blitz loved and hated the stares he got, on one hand, it was attention and their gazes were fearful, on the other hand, it was attention, and they were afraid of him.

When the two reached their destination, a small café tucked neatly away in the city, Blitz was thankful that there weren’t much people. He gestured for PoisonBerry to sit at a booth near the counter. He knew the girl at the register, but something told him she didn’t remember him. Before he could order though, another familiar face rushed in, a vampire girl whose admittedly had much healthier looking skin than his, she ordered tea and coffee. He snorted at the order, knowing that it was not born of indecisiveness, but of an ideology that screamed ‘Life is boring so do what you want and if you end up buried alive or in jail then you did not party hard enough.’ Quite frankly a beautiful philosophy to live by.

“Y-you tr-tryna’ c-c-cure a h-hang-hangover?” He leaned against the counter. She looked over at him, shocked by his existence, and smirked, pulling out a thermos. She unscrewed the cap and held it towards him. The contents of which assaulted his sense of smell. The thermos contained a mix of honey, blood, and vodka.

“M-m-ay-maybe j-just stick to c-candles, A-Amber.” He told her.

“Either you’re a psychic or a stalker, either way I’m outta here.” She exclaimed, pronouncing ‘either’ both ways. True to her word, she gathered up her things and left. The girl behind the counter snorted.

“Next, I guess.” The dark-skinned girl said, a hint of amusement in her voice.

“U-uh, y-yeah, I-I’ll have a sl-slice of st-str-strawberry c-c-cake and a t-t-t-tea for my friend and I’ll have a dou-double-ch-choc-double-chocolate-ch-chip cookie and uh, the sw-sweet-test coffee you have.”

The girl scribbled down the order with a bored expression, then her eyes flicked up and she smiled.

“That’ll be $14.42.” She stood straight and cleared her throat. “But if you can guess my name you’ll get a discount.” She smiled lazily. He might as well have, considering he knew, both her and her twin.

“I c-c-can tell y-ya more th-than th-th-that. A-al-also I’ll p-pay for the va-vampire’s drink t-too, consider-considering h-how sh-she l-left bef-fore she- before she could h-h-hers-self.”

She pretended to ponder it for a moment, then held out her hand for him to shake his. She slid the order through the little window leading to the kitchen.

“Y-your n-n-name i-is Ar-Arti-Artimes, you ha-have a twi-tw-twin with b-bl-blue e-eyes named Apollo, and-and! - y-y’all are fr-friends and c-co-workers with girl n-named Ch-Char-Cha-Charlotte C-Cooke!” She stared at his grinning face with wide eyes.

“Go sit with your friend, your order will be out shortly.” He smiled at her, setting down $9 and going to sit with PoisonBerry.

“Wha-what are you, like, a stalker or somethin’?” She asked with bewilderment. All she got for a response was a small hum.

“Like, how do you know so much?” She rephrased. He leaned over the table at her and spoke in a low tone.

“I-I’m a g-god.” He leaned back up. “A-anyway, af-aft-ter this I f-figured we sh-should g-go v-v-visit an old f-f-friend.”

“Or maybe we should make you go get a haircut because it covers your face.” She said back. He let out a chuckle and a small glare.

A girl with skin the color of cookie dough and caramel-colored curly locks of hair walked over to them, carrying their breakfast. Charlotte Cooke, the love of his life from before death, still looked as angelic as ever. She nodded her head along with whatever was playing in her head-phones and smiled at him as she set down their food. He clumsily searched his bag for some money to tip her with.

“Well, thank you sir!” Her soft voice was music to him.

“H-h-have a n-nice d-day!” He said as walked away. The two ate in silence, PoisonBerry giving him weird looks the whole time. They finished up and left.

“Alright-t, s-s-so, I a-ain’t g-gon-na-na get my h-hair c-cut in p-p-public p-plac-ce.” He said to her as they walked down the gravel roads.

“What, so, you gonna cut it yourself?” She asked as they turned a corner. He didn’t respond, in fact, the walk continued in silence until they reached a point where gravel turned to dirt and buildings turned to trees.

“Where are you taking me?” Her curiosity was starting to turn into unease. She started wondering how much she could trust this guy. Minutes went by with no answer as Blitz lead her down a twisting path that lead to nowhere. She asked him again and he responded with aggression in his stance and an off-putting calmness in his words.

“Y-you cl-clearly aren’t c-c-com-comfortable ‘round me, y-yet you con-continue foll-follow what I s-say. I d-don’t need-need you at this point, a-at th-th-this-s pl-plac-ce.” He turned to face her, and even though his face was visible, it still just as unreadable. “Th-th-there is n-no more g-gun t-to your head-d,” he spread his arms out “and there is n-no g-g-gun in-in my h-h-hand. Ther-the-there’s n-n-noth-thing stop-stopping you fr-from-from leaving.” She looked away, hugging herself with boney arms.

“I got nothin’ to go back to if I leave.”

“D-damned if you d-do, damn-damned if you don’t. Y-you’ve go-got-t-ten this f-far, c-contin-continue, o-or not, it’s-s your ch-choice, I d-d-don’t ca-care.” He continued down the trail, and against her better judgement, she followed behind, like a dog on a leash.

The house was exactly as he remembered it. It towered over the trees and to those unfamiliar with it, they would lose more than just their path. He always loved this place, and it loves him. He could spend eternity wandering its’ halls. His house lifeless, like he had been. Yet there was someone in there. He barged in, ready to tear the place to shreds with his bare hands to find them, to find this intruder and remove them from his home like a parasite from a praying mantis. Yet there was no need to, the person was right there.

“Oh, I thought you’d be home sooner.” With pale, cubby cheeks, red eyes, and long straight blue hair, Sundae had not changed one bit. And judging by the barking corgi that squeezed through her legs to lick him, neither Sundae nor Butterscotch had forgotten him. He picked up the Brit and spun her around, the two laughing like children. Butterscotch yipped happily. He put her down, cleared his throat, and told her what he already knew.

“Blitz, trust me, I’ve been keeping tabs on our dear friends, and I know how to get their memories back. Except,” She gestured to a confused PoisonBerry, “she’s been at sea.” She walked over to the green-eyed girl and took her angular face between her hands. “Plus, she’s changed the most. Whatever made her how she was, was purely thanks to you. She’ll be the hardest to restore. But, we’ll also need her for Midnight.” She lead the two into the house.

“W-w-well, h-how we g-gonna do it?” He asked her, hands in his pockets. A thought struck him then. One that shook him to his core. Had his brother forgotten him? Did his sister forget him? His head was clouded, his ears rang, and nausea consumed him.

“Blitz!” Sundae caught him before he fell. She looked to PoisonBerry. “Well come on then, help me out here.” The raven-haired girl hurried to them.

“What’s wrong with him?” She asked frantically. Sundae simply looked at her. “Is-is he having a stroke?”

“What- No. He, he’ll be fine, he just passed out.”

Blitz woke up a day later. Nausea filled his head and couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, he was numb and in pain all at once. He tried to scream, yet all that came out was blood and bile. He managed to lean over when he threw up. He knew it might be getting on his carpet, but at the moment he didn’t care. After emptying the contents of his stomach and lungs, he regained his senses a bit. His head pounded, and his body felt like it was on fire. He stumbled out of bed, thankfully not stepping in vomit, and limped to the bathroom. He fumbled around the mirror cabinet until he found his meds. He swallowed them along a mouthful of sink water. The room smelled like death, he smelled like death. He tore off the stolen clothes, grimacing when pieces of flesh went with it. He noticed now how his hair was in such a bad state. The brown locks were greasy, tangled, and covered his face. His skin, normally just pale and scarred, was covered patched of green and yellow rot. He stumbled to his bathtub, turning the faucet on scorching hot and dumping an entire bottle of soap in it. He got in and dunked his head under, too. He felt his hand around the floor and found scissors and a comb. With shaky hand he began to cut and comb his hair. By this point the tub was beginning to overflow, but he didn’t care because there was a drain beneath it. Then he bathed himself. He scrubbed until the blistered. He didn’t want to leave this heavenly scorching heat, but the feeling of unease made him leave. He turned the water off, unplugged the drain and went to the mirror. Eyebags, chapped lips, and a big nose greeted him. One eye was icy blue while the other nearly blind. His teeth were yellow and uneven, but he didn’t care as long he had them. He scowled at his reflection and left.

He combed his fingers through freshly cut hair while trying to recall the events of the past, what, day? He’d never been good at keeping track of time. He put on some baggy dark clothes and taking the vomit filled bucket, opened his window and dumped the bile out. Satisfied, he went to his desk and opened his journal. He scowled at the sticky-notes and carefully peeled them off the pages and threw them away. He flipped to a blank page and began writing.

Either he blacked out or zoned because when he opened his eyes the room was filled with the warm glow of the afternoon. He stretched his hands over his head and his stomach growled under his sweater. He groaned as he left the room. When he got to the dining room with a box of cereal, he saw Sundae surrounded by pictures and papers. He spotted his camera on the table, a cheap little thing he bought with what little money he had when he was a kid. His most prized possession, and Sundae kept it. He was overjoyed until she spoke.

“Blitz! I know who we’ll bring back first.” The black-clothed girl had only just noticed he was there. She picked up a photo of two girls dancing together under the un, not a care in the world. He remembered that day, he and Luci, a werewolf girl, had met Amber. He took the picture when the two were dancing to some upbeat jazz song that came on his radio.

“Wh-which one? He asked, hoping it would be Amber, as she might be easiest to find.

“Why not both? I know where they live.” Oh right, Blitz forgot she’d been stalking their friends while he was dead. This would be easy, they could get most of them done in a day. He gathered the materials they’d need, got PoisonBerry, and set off in a carriage to town.

Amber had a small apartment full of takeout boxes and unlit candles everywhere. The place was a mess and Blitz almost felt bad until he remembered that when he first met her she had been living in a doomsday bunker under a field. The curtains were closed, and the place was dusty and smelled like blood. Suddenly, the door slammed shut behind them and the candles were lit. A figure cloaked in shadows stared them down with glowing red eyes.

“A stalker you are, you should have stayed watching from afar.” Amber stepped into the dim light. PoisonBerry hid behind Sundae who stood straight-faced with her arms crossed. Blitz stepped forward, and of all the scents in the room, there was no cinnamon. The one missing was in his satchel. He pulled it out with a box of matches. He lit the candle right as the vampire struck. Fangs almost in his neck, she went limp in his arms and the light became blinding.

When their eyesight came back to them, they were under the warmth of the sun. Tendrils pure light came from the vampire’s chest. And with a burst of light, she awoke in his arms as the sun set. She let out a breathy laugh as she looked up at Blitz’s bewildered face. She cupped his face in her hands and kissed his cheek.

“Good ta’ see ya again, amigo.” She looked around and hurriedly sat up. “Where is our wolf?” She looked to him. Sundae cleared her throat and dusted herself off, leaving a shocked PoisonBerry laying in the grass.

“Your friend is in the circus, and the circus will be in town quite soon, just in time for the full moon. And since she joined recently, they have no idea.” She spoke

“S-so, what, she g-gets t-ta’ t-t-town, and w-wolf’s-wolf’s out t-to pl-play. A-and b-b-boom, j-just like-just like th-that, e’eryone’s-s d-dead.”

“Yep. So, if we don’t want a massacre on our hands, we gotta get her back quick.” Sundae stated.

When they got back home, Sundae and PoisonBerry started cooking, and Blitz and Amber started planning.

“So, as a wolf, they ain’t gonna be able to contain her. She’ll escape and look for a place where she can alone.”

“R-right, s-so we gotta-gotta he-her.”

“Do we got anything that’ll do anything like that.” Amber asked him.

Blitz went to his closet and pulled out a long chain.

“That’ll work.”

That night Blitz didn’t sleep. He thought of all that could go wrong and of his brother and sister. He had no idea if they remembered him, if they even still alive. Though he hated it, he was human, and humans feared the unknown. If his brother continued down his path of assassination, Blitz had no of knowing. Eventually, he gave up on sleep and decided to write instead.

He soon found that writing was a great way to pass the time when he heard birds chirping. Yet, right when he was going to leave the room, his body shut down. When he awoke it was obvious that his surroundings were not based in reality. The grass was a deep red, and thorny vines strangled anything that wasn’t grass. The sky was pitch black, yet in the great nothingness it seemed to all flow towards a single point. He followed the hypnotic movement of the inky nothing, each step calming and his movements languid and heavy. Eventually he found it, or rather, himself. The picture perfect of image of a younger version of him surrounded by sunflowers.

“Why, why do you put them through this? All you do causes them to suffer.” He scowled at the child, it’s voice alien and unnerving to him, its words dripping with poison. He stalked toward the child, it’s hair a blonde and tangled halo that he wanted to rip out.

“I don’t recall even speaking at such an age, child.” He hissed, circling around it, ignoring how weird his voice sounded. “Why is it that you’ve summoned me back to the realm make-believe? To gloat about your pureness, your virginity and innocence? That won’t last you very long, you know?” His voice echoed in the small infinity.

“Nothing I do will lead me to becoming you.” It sneered at him.

“And yet, here I am, all you are is a reminder of the purity I lost, the innocence that got stolen from me.” The world vibrated and shook with every word he spoke, the sky melting into the ground, leaving an inky void everywhere. “I hate dreaming, y’know. And you, we, I hate being alone. And my friends keep me from loneliness, and you’re keeping me from my friends.” The last thing he saw was that child’s damn face, mocking him, and contorted in fear. It was an ugly sight, one he was glad to leave. Though when he came back to the real world, there was an overwhelming urge to leave. He wanted to leave. The thought had not yet crossed his mind before now, and it sickened him. Leaving meant all of his progress would be wasted. Leaving meant abandoning his friends. All those forgotten memories, wasted. Yet, he knew he would prefer for them not to know. As he packed his bag, every fiber of him screamed at him not to leave. He found himself unable to scream back. He left his home behind him, a weight lifted off his shoulders and a sickness in his gut. No one knew he was leaving. Except for PoisonBerry, who followed close behind him like a dog.

He took the long way to the docks on purpose, not wanting to go through the sunflower field. A small voice in his head told him wouldn’t be able to avoid it for long. He never could. When he got to the docks, the voice screamed at him to go back. The pirate ship he had left was there, crew members guarding his only escape. He heard a whimper behind him. Of course she was here, of course she followed him, she always did and now she was going to die. He tried to hide her in the forest edge, but it was too late. The captain, who he faintly recognized as PoisonBerry’s sister, spotted them. She called out to them, forcing them to step onto the docks, and right into their clutches.

“Well, ain’t this an odd sight, a corpse and skeleton.” The blonde walked to the pair, crew following behind. Their weapons were drawn and there was murder in their eyes. Frankly, Blitz was unaffected. It all happened so suddenly, one minute they were staring the others down, the next they were in a crate, being thrown into the ocean. Water was filling the space as they sunk. PoisonBerry was panicking, pleading, screaming tothe gods to save her. The only answer she received was the rush of water.

“Pray-prayer is f-f-futile, the-th-the gods-s are f-f-forbidd-den to answ-swer. W-we are al-l-lone in oc-cean and th-they m-might a-as w-well be d-d-dead to- to us.” His voice shook with irritation and his body shook with fear.

“This—This is all your fault! I’m going to die and it’s all thanks to you!” She screamed with rage. Hands flew to her mouth.

“Y-you’re the o-o-one who f-f-fucking f-followed m-me.” There was a shift in the pitch, he could see her eyes.

“You held a gun to my head!” Brighter. “You made me leave with nothing but the clothes on my back.” He could see tears now, glowing, angry tears. “And even when you did give me a choice, my only options were you or being lost and alone!” Brighter still, he could see everything in the box. “I-I chose—I chose you.” The green light became blinding, his ears rang, and his head ached, yet he didn’t look away.

“Welcome home, Nat-Natalie.” He whispered and closed his eyes. He felt bony arms around him, wetness forming on his sweater and sobbing in his ears. He cried too and clung to his friend like a child. “Y-you’re back—you—you’re back. You’re c-come back—come back to—to me!” They held each other tightly as if either one were to let go, the other would fade away. She pulled back from him.

“Midnight! We—we gotta get Midnight!” She stood up. He looked around, sunflowers surrounded them, and they stared only at him, judging, mocking. He closed his eyes.

“I-I g-guess Amb-ber and S-sundae got—got Luc-ci handled.”

The shewolf snarled in her cage as people began surrounding it. They took pictures and laughed at the beast. In the crowd came a loud noise. It progressively got louder as people started clearing away. Amber walked to the cage and placed the trumpet down. The wolf growled at her.

“They got cha’ caged up like some type o’ beast, huh.” She reached her hand into the cage and opened it. The wolf put her paw on the human’s hand.

On the other side of town Blitz and PoisonBerry dragged a blonde girl up a cliff. She was tied up and screaming muffled cusses and curses through the improvised gag. They made it to the top where the ritual was waiting. Blitz waited with the now panicked girl as PoisonBerry picked up a leather-bound book. Blitz shoved Midnight, the blonde, into the circle of mushrooms.

“Fe lat me hahn se fuite nam!”

The circle burned with a bright light and the witch was restored. The ropes had been burned off and Midnight stood. The lovers locked eyes.

“PoisonBerry?” She asked, her accent thick with emotion. Tears welled up in their eyes as PoisonBerry ran to her shorter counterpart. They fell to the ground, holding each other tightly and whispering to each other in their native languages.

Blitz watched on, breathless. It was like he had been a man dying of thirst, seeing this scene of two soulmates coming together was like gulping down water. It hurt like hell going down, yet the refreshing cold numbed it, making him forget everything else, if only for a second. He felt around his scarred neck for a piece of worn string. He found it and clutched the two rings tightly.

He once wrote in his journal about their dynamic. “Visually, they’re opposites. PoisonBerry is tall and almost concerningly thin, with eyes angled in a permanent scowl, pointed ears and nose and a sharp and angular jaw. Her body is boney and pale, her nails bitten down to the nub. (likely a habit she picked up from Blitzs brother) Midnight on the other hand, is short and curvy, with tanned skin. (Blitz’s brother would say she’s “thick”) Her jaw is square with an upturned nose. Her eyes are big and squared off, eyes burning with a bright orange-red flame that held so much passion. So, soft curves and boxy features stood in high contrast with angular and cat-like sharp features. They dress differently as well, yet both seem to have a strong preference for stripes. Midnight wears a lot of black high-waisted skirts and shorts, with flowing short-sleeved shirts, black and blue being her main colors. PoisonBerry wears mostly tight-fitting dresses and sleeved cloaks, blacks, reds, and purples dominated her choice of color, with the occasional splash of green. Visually, they’re opposites, but they’re both filled with a passion for life that I could never hope to have.” (frankly, he used to be jealous of that when he was little, now he doesn’t feel much about it)

When the three of them got back to the house they were met with a vampire, a werewolf, a demon, and an invitation to a masquerade. The group said their hellos and discussed dinner plans. (Lucy glared at Midnight the entire time, silently nodding along to the conversation) Blitz pointed out the moon hanging above and made them agree to have a big breakfast in the morning. While everyone else slept, Blitz fought to keep his closed. The invite they had gotten left a bad taste in his mouth. The invite had been handwritten in a script that he could barely read, fancy lettering with unnecessary loops and curves, but he knew exactly who wrote it. The invite was from his half-sister, somewhere in the back of his mind, he wondered if his brother had gotten an invite too. He really hoped not, their half-sister had put them through hell when they were kids, leaving them with invisible scars and (thankfully only on Blitz) actual scars too. So, for her to even think for a second that Ty would go was idiotic. He sat up in his bed, wanting to vent his anger out. He opened his curtains to let the moonlight in, lit a candle, and went to his desk. He opened a drawer, one full of gears and nuts and bolts and other bits and scraps he collected over the years. He set some of them on the desk, stared at them for a bit, hoping inspiration would come, then put them back. He opened another drawer and took out his journal. (he had made it when he was very into book-binding, plenty of pages that could act as whatever he wanted) He started taking an account of all that happened since he last wrote. He loved writing, it was a good way to clear his head and keep track of important and not-so-important details that he would surely forget otherwise. It was a way to escape reality, if only for a sec. And this time, escapism worked well, because before he knew it the sun was rising, his candle had melted into a pool of wax and there was knocking at his door. Sundae entered and then gagged.

“Smells like rot in here.”

He turned his chair towards her and lifted his bare arm, covered in varying levels of decay and scars, then gestured to himself, in a similar state.

“S-s-sund-dae, my-my b-body’s m-m-m-mending, it w-won’t- it’s-s gon-gonna t-take awhi-whil-le t-till it’s heal-healed.”

Sundae hummed and stepped in, closing the door behind her.

“Seems as though we’re the only ones awake, well, Amber might be, but who knows with that girl.” Sundae told him. Blitz made a gesture that said ‘well, you know her.’ Sundae hummed in agreement, leaning against the wall where the sun illuminated her features, giving her an almost angelic glow. Ironic, considering the two rather prominent dark red horns sticking from her forehead.

“Y’know, I found PoisonBerry and Midnight curled up together, making up for lost time, I suppose.” They laughed quietly to each other. (Blitz’s ended with a rather nasty cough) He walked to his dresser and took some dark colored clothes from the pile next to it. A quick sniff determined they smelled better than he did. He was buttoning up his shirt when it hit him.

“The-the i-i-inv-v-vite, M-mint s-s-sent-t it h-here, t-to us—to y-you! Sh-she re-rem-rem—she—she kn-knows you.” He curled up into himself. “Sh-she remem-remembers wh-who we are.” He whispered.

Sundae approached him carefully, acting as though he were a wild animal. He knew it was unintentional, but when the look in her eyes went from friendly to cautious, it stung.

“Blitz, relax, you’ll be ok. If anything happens, I promise it won’t happen to you.” She was trying so hard to be comforting, but in his mind, that promise was empty, it twisted like a viper in his thoughts, mocking and tormenting and cruel and manipulating. He knew it wasn’t, Sundae has always been his most trustworthy friend, but he couldn’t help it.

Slowly they stood together, and with shaky hands, he got dressed, slowly, but still.

They eventually got everyone up and ready. (PoisonBerry made the process more difficult than needed, but still) Blitz suggested they go to Pepper’s café. The walk there was peaceful aside from Blitz’s occasional coughing fits. As the group was walking in, someone walked out. The person rudely bumped shoulders with Amber, calling her a deadbeat lawyer. Blitz saw red. He told the group to go head inside and order. Reluctantly, they agreed. (though PoisonBerry sensed a fight and wanted to join, Midnight glared her down till she went with the rest of the group) He glared at the stranger. The person was, to put it simply, jacked. He had at least a head on Blitz, then again, most people did. (stunted growth along with being biologically female will make you shorter than most other guys) To anyone else, the person seemed to have the upper hand, but Blitz wasn’t planning to fight. He shoved his hands in his pockets and snarled at the stranger.

“I-if we were-weren’t-t i-in p-publi-lic I-I’d b-beh-head you.” The person snorted with laughter in response and Blitz lost control. He lunged at the stranger, his mind far away while his body acted on its own. He felt familiar arms wrap around him, pulling him back. The stranger’s face was a bloody mess. Taking one final look at Blitz, the stranger ran.

“Sir,” he looked up at the voice, and stared into aqua eyes. “I don’t tolerate violence at my establishment.”

“Sorry about him, he’s” He looked at Sundae, her hands in her coat pockets and her eyes filled with shame and embarrassment.

He pushed himself from Pepper’s grip and looked at her. Concern and anger were etched into her features. He dug around his jacket pocket and pulled out two necklaces that were tangled around his fingers. He opened his hand, palm facing down, and the sun and moon pendants glittered in the sunlight. He took Pepper’s hand and placed the necklaces in her palm.

“I-I—uh—h-hope this—th-this m-makes up f-for—for wh-what I-I’ve d-d-one.” He disconnected his hand from hers and nodded towards the door. He and Sundae walked in and sat down at the booth with the others.

“S-s-so, you-you’re law-l-lawyer?” He asked Amber, to get rid of the silence. She laughed, and time seemed to move again.

“Yeah dude, a good one, at that!”

“So, like, is candle-making a hobby or somethin’?” PoisonBerry asked, confused by the new information.

“I think she became a lawyer when her memories were false.” Midnight interjected. The conversation continued while Blitz and Luci stayed silent. Well, at least he was paying attention, Luci was chewing on the napkins. C.C. arrived with their food and drinks and Blitz locked eyes with her. He swore he saw some of recognition there. She smiled at him as she left, and he smiled back. He saw Pepper rush into the kitchen while they ate. He didn’t expect her or her twin to get their memories back for quite a while, as even when he came back from the dead the first time it took a while for them to remember.

Then the bell jingled, and a lady came in who was obviously trying to conceal her identity, yet even with sunglasses and a hat, he knew who she was. He could smell not only the fear and anxiety radiating off her, but also the faint stench of sulfur. Her name was Lola Viper, and in her hand she held an invitation.

#mango man writes #oc shit #story #i can't figure out how to put something under a 'read more'#writing #abstract the book

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the-council-of-new-york-vampires · 5 years

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Can you please submit Adam's past!!! As well as some headcanons on him ;(

Out of Character:

Adam’s past is in the works… You see, I started some day in December and didn’t do so much work on it since. 😅 Technically, it’s finished, but it’s especially hard to edit, because it’s the longest one I’ve yet written, and I really do want it to be perfect. But don’t worry, I’ll def publish it. ☺️

Lemme start with my headcanons:

My biggest one: Adam is a psychopath. So, sometime ago, I asked people on their opinion on that topic and legit no one replied… Thanks for that, guys. 🙃😂 Anyway, I have been drowning myself in research for several weeks now, and I know that there’s a lot of misinformation about psychopathy online. Like, psychopaths have very little to do with Hollywood movies, and it’s not a mental illness but a neurological disorder. I differentiate between sociopaths and psychopaths as well, as in: Psychopaths are born, sociopaths are made, and they behave and think differently. I have been analyzing Adam’s behavior and scenes carefully and, as far as I’m concerned, he meets all the signs for psychopathy. I know it’s kind of a critical topic to discuss, but I’d love to analyze Adam’s behavior and thoughts and compare it to psychopathy, in a separate post. (I am not looking to insult or offend anyone with this, I just love giving interesting characters more depth and exploring their minds and ways of thinking, especially when it comes to villains.)

Fitting the above one, Adam was a con artist at some point. I always thought of this job he would be so good at, but never knew the name until I came across it during my psychopathy research. Con artist! That job is made for him. I headcanon, some day after being a politician as a human, he came to America and started working as, I don’t know the name, but those people who came to people’s houses and sold them bullshit. He didn’t do that for a long time, though, because I don’t think it makes good money and it has a low social standing. However, that’s how he slipped into the con artist job or how he calls it “working in the finance sector”. He did that for, I don’t know, ten years or more, before he decided he had made enough money with it. He wanted to get into poilitics again to satisfy his desire for power, and quit being a con artist, because it would have been too risky to do both at the same time. (I doubt he was ever caught, but conning people is obviously illegal.)

It was slightly hinted at by Adrian that, sometimes, Adam kills women after sleeping with them. I think when he was around Priya’s age, he did that very often. Just sought them out and killed them afterwards, because he liked the feeling of power and control it gave him. In the present, it is more likely that he has contacts for things like that, contacts he does not kill, because it would be a huge scandal, obviously. Still, he sees all people as objects, humans more so than vampires, and attractive young women primary as sex objects to use and discard, and he thinks it’s pathetic that they adore him and seek him out the way they do, that they ‘let’ him kill them. But of course, he pretends to be this super elegant gentleman. I do think he was taught to treat women with special respect, but, if you consider his actual personality, it’s highly unlikely that he keeps that mask on in the bedroom. He displays it in public, because most women love gentlemen, but, unless his lover needs to be manipulated by him or he wants something from her, he is totally different, degrading even, in the bedroom.

I think Adam is very vain to the point that he needs longer in the bathroom than some ladies. I think he has a personal barber, stylist, you name it, and they come over every morning. He loves his appearance and - sorry - I can definitely see him making out with a mirror. At least, whenever he walks by, he does admire the guy he sees. But how could you not? How could women not? At least, that’s what Adam thinks. And lemme judge: he’s damn right. Adam’s About 183 cm tall (I just know), he’s muscular, he has a nice haircut, a fancy beard, great taste in fashion… And those, lemme guess, thick 7 inches. 😌😏 Hehe.

Pretty sure that Adam has a wild, irresponsible streak in him that he must live out somehow. I mean, he dated Priya and as if she would ever date anyone boring. Adam loves partying, irresponsible sexual acts, the adrenaline when seeking thrills. Despite what people think, I can definitely see him as a reckless driver, especially when alone. This guy has no fears. He is similar to Kamilah in some ways, but that’s one where they differ: I think he can let go better than she can, he just needs the right circumstances, right people, right situations. He is a lot more likely to play Roulette and bet on black just for the hell of it. With Priya, he did many irresponsible things, thinking “I don’t care. I love it.” Icona Pop knows. 😉

As a mortal, Adam had a family and children. Considering the historical context, this is more than likely. People often say they can’t imagine him as a father, and in a way I agree: I think he was a very neglectful and absent father who had a lot more kids than he wanted (considering the fact that he wanted none 😂). Furthermore, he was a very disloyal husband, married more than once, got women pregnant who he wasn’t married to, banished them or forced them into an abortion (people knew there were ways to miscarry)… I’m guessing the probability for him to cheat in a relationship to be as high as 80%. I see no reason for him not to cheat, because he has no moral compass and he believes he can have anyone, deserving of as many lovers as he wants. However, if she would cheat, he would either be incredibly angry or totally careless. Anyway, if there is one person seeing a crying toddler and thinking “Damn, I’m glad my kids are dead”, it’s Adam.

Back to his roots: Adam grew up Catholic. This is not me saying religion makes people bad (I’m religious myself), but me saying he grew up at a time and in a country that was certainly Catholic. However, I highly doubt he ever believed in any religion, simply was raised into a strictly religious environment. In that way, he broke rules very early such as no lying or no touching yourself, and this is how he learned to be sneaky about it. This theory explains his name as well, as Adam was the first human created by God, and he was likely named after him, not as the first human in the world, but the first baby born to his parents, a noble couple. I’m very sure he grew up in a big family. However, he is only focused only on himself since… all the time.

Obviously, regarding sex, Adam has done almost everything there is to do. I think he is much more animalistic and pleasure-focused than people think, and he loves to break taboos the same way he breaks rules as he considers himself above them. Imagine anything nasty and I bet he has done it. Either with someone kinky like Priya or he just persuaded a ‘normal’ person into letting him try whatever ‘sick’ fantasy he had. Also, he loves group sex with, like, four women who cater to his needs. I tried to widen this headcanon a bit by bringing guys into it as well. While I think Adam is definitely heterosexual, I wouldn’t be surprised if anything happened between him and a man. I headcanon something like: He was at an orgy, drunk or whatever, centuries ago, doing his thing, and a guy just approached and gave him oral. Lol. And he let him do it, because why the hell not? Meanwhile, I find kissing a bit too intimate, but I can imagine he has done it, too, out of manipulation or because a guy just kissed him. With Priya, I headcanon he seduced young women, killed them… and they had fun with them, like… blood play and stuff…

I think Adam’s basic directive is “I don’t care”, regarding the other members of The Council as well. Of course, there are things he cares about deeply, like killing the Clanless or getting votes, but all of that serves no one but himself, the only person on Earth he actually cares about. You could give him any person’s name and ask if they shall live or die and he wouldn’t care at all what happens to them (unless that person’s existence is useful or bothering for him). Yeah, he has no conscience and he gives zero shits. His emotions are super limited. Like, when Gaius presented them his morbid plan, Adam was careless to the point that he had to observe the others’ reactions to be able to form and voice an opinion. He is calm by default and rarely gets angry (the anger he showed in several scenes was fake in order to appear believable).

Regarding lovers, Adam has a type. He likes young women (22-28), naive and ‘stupid’, women he can easily control, and he sees himself deserving of having all the pretty ones, like trophies or possessions. When someone doesn’t have the right age or look, he considers them not good enough for him and would find it pathetic if they asked him out. He doesn’t like independent women, he likes women he can make dependent on him. He always needs to be the superior one, financially as well as intellectually. All this explains why he never had and never ever will have a thing for Kamilah. She is everything he can’t control, can’t subject, and that’s why he respects her and can openly express a platonic liking for her. But deep inside, women like that threaten him and he wants to destroy them, because they are too smart to fall for him. And women (people) he can’t benefit from, who refuse to obey him, who he can’t manipulate, have no use to him. Regarding one night stands, which he had a lot more than gilfriends, he only targets very attractive women. He likes dark types, like himself, rather than blondes, and women who are particularly feminine. Long hair, long nails, dresses, high heels… I think that attracts him. And he loves asses. And Latinas. Sorry.

I think Adam has more than two faces. To the public, he is that super friendly, charming guy who wants the best for anyone. To The Council, he is that friendly guy who has drastic measures, but still puts a lot of importance on their team-spirit. Part of the mask is off, but he still presents himself as friendly and interested in the well-being of the public. Like, he greets the members happily and calls them his “friends”, but everyone does know they shouldn’t turn on him. (The Baron even said so.) When dating Priya, he showed a different face again. More of that easy-going guy, a great sport, overly protective of his ‘loved’ ones. He always alternates between “Hello, I am super friendly and chill, you can talk about anything with me” and “I am super dangerous and you better not fuck with me”. Then, in reality, he is a cold-hearted snake who cares about no one but himself. Now imagine him around his Clan. I think his mask slips off even further than it does when he’s with The Council, in a way that they might even fear him, because they know what he’s capable of. Or they admire him because he leaves the mask on, like the nerd in the train to the Ball does, who obviously has a crush on him? It is so different to assess Adam, because he is a great actor and he can legit be anyone. He can be the kind philantrophist you support, the sexy celebrity you admire, the relaxed guy who is your best friend, the intelligent Clan leader, the most caring boyfriend you have had, the most abusive boyfriend you have had… or the man who is actually planning to murder you.

#adam vega #bloodbound #bb #choices #choices: stories you play

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tomeandflickcorner · 6 years

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Caravan of Courage: An Ewok Adventure

I’m actually approaching these next two reviews with a sense of trepidation. While I remember loving the Ewok movies as a kid, it’s been years since I last saw them. I think the last time I watched them prior to this moment was in the early 90s when they’d air on television. So I have absolutely no idea how they’re going to hold up now, or how they’ll come across to my adult brain. Before I begin, I am aware that the Wiki page states this movie is supposed to take place before Return of the Jedi. But something happens in the movie that makes me feel as if it makes more sense for the events in this film to have occurred after Return of the Jedi rather than before. I’ll explain what I mean when we get to the scene in question.

The movie begins with a prologue of sorts, with a mother and father searching for their missing children. Throughout the movie, it becomes apparent that this family of four, the Towani family, were traveling somewhere in their star cruiser, but something went wrong and they crash landed on the moon of Endor. Because they didn’t know where they were, they could hardly send a transmission for help, so they were pretty much stuck there until they could get the ship repaired. But on the night the movie opens, the two children, 14-year-old Mace and 5-year-old Cindel, have apparently wandered off, despite their parents’ instructions to stay near the star cruiser. While the parents, Catarine and Jeremitt, are out looking for them, they are ambushed by a giant troll-like being called the Gorax. The Gorax ends up capturing Catarine and Jeremitt for reasons that are not made clear. Did the Gorax plan on eating them? Did he just want to keep them as human pets? It’s never really addressed.

But anyway, the movie then cuts to the star players of the movie- the Ewoks. Specifically Wicket and his family, which consists of his father, Deej, his mother, Shoudu, his two older brothers, Weechee and Widdle, and his baby sister, Winda. (Incidentally, you might recognize Widdle as one of the two Ewoks who hijacked the Walker with Chewbacca during the Battle of Endor in Return of the Jedi.) On this day, Weechee and Widdle have also gone missing. So Deej decides to go off looking for them, utilizing a hang glider to search the forest.

So, remember how one of the biggest issues with The Star Wars Holiday Special (not the only issue, but one of the biggest) was the fact that they were mostly focusing on a family of Wookiees and didn’t give us any subtitles, expecting us to just figure out what was happening on our own? Well, in this TV movie, they did learn their lesson. Sort of. While they don’t give us subtitles in this one, either, we did get a narrator. Yeah, they got Burl Ives, who you might remember from the Rankin Bass version of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer (among other things), to narrate this movie. Unfortunately, this really doesn’t work to the movie’s advantage. There are times when it feels as if the Narrator is talking down to the audience. And at first, the use of a narrator makes the movie seem more like a nature documentary on Ewoks rather than a plot-driven movie.

Deej eventually locates his wayward sons. They were apparently climbing a rocky cliff but got stuck halfway up. After Deej helps them get out of their predicament, the three Ewoks start making their way back to their village. But first, they have to make a detour. While he was gliding over the forest on his hang glider, Deej saw something glittering in the sunlight through the forest canopy, so he decides to take his sons with him to investigate what it was. And that’s how they discover the crashed star cruiser. They step inside to investigate their discovery, and thus end up finding Cindel hiding behind a panel. Not sure if we’re supposed to conclude she made it back to the star cruiser after her parents ran into the Gorax or if she’d been there all along and the parents just didn’t look hard enough. Either way, Cindel, being 5-years-old, instantly decides the Ewoks are friends based on how cute they were. Her brother, Mace, on the other hand, is less trusting of the little teddy bear Aliens. Instead, he charges in and aims his blaster at them, stating that they might be the beings who took their parents. I’m guessing it’s been a few days since the events of the movie prologue. Eventually, the Ewoks take the two kids back with them to their village. Though they take Mace back by tying him up and carrying him. Rather similar to how they initially treated Han, Luke, Chewbacca and R2 in Return of the Jedi. The Ewoks must really not like human males. That, or they just don’t like the hostile ones.

Now, I gotta pause to talk about the two kids. There’s no sense in denying that neither of these two give a good performance, even by child actor standards. In fact, with the kid who plays Cindel, Aubree Miller, this was her first acting role. And believe me, it shows. But I can forgive her for that because, again, she’s only 5-years-old. Mace, on the other hand? I don’t think he’s even trying sometimes. There are some points in his performance when he seems to think all you need to do to convey emotion is to shout your lines. Also, I sometimes get the feeling that the movie was trying to make Mace a discount Luke Skywalker. Sure, he shows no indication of being Force Sensitive, but his costume throughout the movie bears a strong resemblance to Luke’s X-Wing pilot outfit. Even his haircut seems similar to Luke’s.

When they get back to the Ewok Village, it soon becomes apparent that Cindel is sick with a fever. Fortunately, Deej and his wife, Shoudu, are able to give Cindel some medicine that helps her, but when Cindel is still ill in the morning, they have to go out and gather more medicine for her. To get the key ingredient for the medicine, they have to travel to this tree in the middle of the forest. Because this specific tree emits a special kind of fluid that the Ewoks have used to treat their ailments for eons. (I wonder if this is the Tree of Life they mentioned in The Star Wars Holiday Special.)

It’s at this point where we first start to see how much of a dingbat Mace is. While the Ewoks are harvesting the tree’s curative sap for Cindel’s medicine, Mace spots a large hole in a nearby hollow tree. And there appears to be some kind of cute little fuzzy critter inside this hole. For some reason, Mace decides to go over and stick his hand into the hole in order to get this critter. Yes, I know Mace is supposed to be 14 in this movie, but at the same time, he’s presumably grown up in the Star Wars universe. You’d think he’d know better than to go about touching random fauna like this. The moment he reaches inside, a larger creature ends up biting down, latching onto his hand. Apparently this creature is a predatory animal called a Temptor. The fuzzy creature Mace saw was part of the creature’s tongue. I guess this creature is a bit like an alligator snapping turtle, in the sense that it lures prey to come closer with their tongue. So the Ewoks have to drop what they’re doing to come to his rescue.

Despite Mace’s stupidity, the Ewoks are able to gather up enough tree fluid to manufacture more medicine for Cindel. The following morning, the medicine seems to have done the trick, as Cindel is feeling all better. And right away, she develops an instant friendship with Wicket, possibly because they’re supposedly around the same age.

Also, it’s here that I noticed something a bit off-putting about the movie. This is supposed to take place in the Star Wars universe, in a galaxy far, far away. So can someone please explain to me how the Ewoks share their home with animals commonly seen on Earth? I’m not kidding, here. By this point in the movie, we’ve seen the Ewoks have ponies, goats, rabbits and ferrets. Is this movie is suggesting that those particular species are actually native to the moon of Endor and somehow ended up on Earth as an invasive species? I mean, the events of the Star Wars films are supposed to have happened a long, long time ago. So maybe, by the time then became now, the native people of the Star Wars universe somehow found their way here to the Milky Way and ended up colonizing Earth, bringing with them an assortment of critters that we now associate with our planet. I guess that’s as good of an explanation as any.

Anyway, Cindel starts trying to communicate with Wicket about how they ended up on the moon of Endor, explaining how their star cruiser crashed. Out of nowhere, Wicket starts repeating Cindel’s statements in comprehensible English. Or Basic, to use the Star Wars terminology. Yep, this movie shows Wicket starting to develop the ability to speak Basic. By the time the sequel, The Battle for Endor, comes along, he is able to speak Basic fluently. And that is why I take issue with this movie supposedly taking place before Return of the Jedi and therefore think it makes more sense to set this movie after the Original Trilogy ends. Because if this did take place before Episode 6, then there is no reason why Wicket wouldn’t have been able to actually engage in a conversation with Leia. Or why the other Ewoks seemed to be so hostile to Luke and Han upon seeing them. If they’d already met Mace and Cindel by that point, then they must have noticed the fact that Han, Luke and Leia were from the same species.

Because of her newfound friendship with Wicket, Cindel suggests to Mace that the Ewoks could help them find their parents. Mace, however, isn’t convinced, dismissing the Ewoks as animals. Which is weird, because he must have realized by this point that the Ewoks are sentient beings. And, being from the Star Wars universe, he should be at least somewhat familiar with non-humanoid Aliens. Regardless, Mace decides to take Cindel and sneak away in the middle of the night so they could continue the search for their parents. Which was really stupid on his part. Once again, they’re on a planetary moon they’re not familiar with and therefore don’t know what nocturnal fauna there might be. But that’s what Mace decides to do.

After traveling for a bit, Cindel insists that they’re lost and she can’t walk any further, so Mace sets up camp, building a campfire to keep warm. As they’re sitting around, they start to discuss their parents, and whether or not they’re dead. Mace then starts to confide in Cindel how he wishes he’d been a better son. I guess the implication is that Mace sometimes misbehaved. And it’s possible that this is basically him saying that he shouldn’t have wandered off the night Jeremitt and Catarine went missing.

At that moment, this wolf-boar creature suddenly appears and starts to chase the two kids, forcing them to take refuge inside a hollow tree for the night. When morning comes, we see the Ewok family had managed to track them down, as they are trying to fight off the wolf-boar. And there’s no denying the stop-motion effect they used with the wolf-boar did not stand up against the test of time, as it looks really dated. Nowhere near as good as the Rancor. Yes, I know this movie was made on a considerably smaller budget, but even so. Eventually, the wolf-boar is brought down by a well-aimed poison dart from Wicket. And, when they get a close look at the dead wolf-boar, they see he’s wearing a collar. Meaning he belonged to someone. But what really catches Mace and Cindel’s attention is the fact that their father’s Life Monitor is stuck to the collar. Life Monitors, from what I gather, are a type of bracelet that you can wear, which is used by groups of people to keep track on the life status of everyone else wearing the bracelet. Since Jeremitt’s Life Monitor states he’s alive, the children have a renewed hope that they’ll find their mother and father.

But before they can hope to reunite with their parents, Mace and Cindel have to figure out where the wolf-boar came from. Because knowing that would most likely help determine where the parents are. To help Mace and Cindel, the Ewok family take them to Logray, the village shaman, in the hopes that he could help determine the parents’ location. Thankfully, Logray can help them. Because he has some kind of magical spinning top thing that can enable you to observe things in other locations. That’s right, magic now exists in the Star Wars universe. Even though it’s never mentioned at any other point in the Star Wars media. Though I guess it’s possible what the Ewoks call magic is actually the Force. Does this mean Ewoks can be Force Sensitive, too? Anyway, Logrey’s magic top helps them learn that the missing parents are prisoners of the Gorax. Upon seeing the danger her parents are in, Cindel begs Deej to help them rescue them. After some hesitation, on account of the fact that the Gorax lives in a Forbidden Fortress that no Ewok has ever returned from, Deej ultimately decides to accompany Mace and Cindel on their quest to rescue their parents. And his three sons, Weechee, Widdle and Wicket also volunteer to go along.

Here, we do get a rather nicely acted scene, considering the actors are wearing Ewok costumes. During the night, we see Shodu mournfully looking around at her family while everyone is sleeping. It is clear that she is fearful about the safety of her family and is terrified that she might not see her husband or sons again. After all, the Gorax is suppoed to be very dangerous. Eventually, Deej wakes up to comfort her, even though he is probably equally as scared. I don’t know why, but there’s just something about this scene that I really appreciated.

When morning comes, we finally get to the whole caravan thing this movie’s title promised us, as Deej, Weechee, Widdle, Wicket, Mace and Cindel prepare to leave on their journey to the Gorax’s lair in order to rescue Mace and Cindel’s parents. And it only took four days in the show’s timeline for the actual plot to begin. Before they leave, Logrey performs some sacred Ewok ritual, in which each of the travelers are given a special totem. According to the Narrator, these totems were all once owned by the Legendary Ewok Warriors. (Shame we couldn’t get more clarification on who these Legendary Warriors were.) The first three totems are all basically feathered headdresses, with each one supposedly representing a different attribute. Deej gets the White Wings of Hope, Weechee, the oldest son, gets the Red Wings of Courage and Widdle gets the Blue Wings of Strength. The other totems have a bit more variety, however. For instance, Wicket is presented with a magical walking stick and Cindel receives a candle that’s called the Candle of Pure Light. As for Mace, his totem is a rock. But because Mace is a twat, he dismisses the rock as useless and purposely drops it as they leave Logrey’s hut. While I understand why he might not see the significance of a rock on this journey, it’s not as if Cindel’s candle or Wicket’s walking stick had an obvious significance at this point. And at least a rock is somewhat useful. What did Deej and the two oldest Ewok sons get? Feathered headdresses. While I’m sure they are ceremonially significant to the Ewok culture, they’re not going to be of much use in a fight with the Gorax. Anyway, the last two totems in the ceremony that Logrey performs are an ivory tooth and a crystal. Deej brings these last two totems with them in order to present them to two other Ewoks, in the hopes that they will join them on their quest. With the totems all gathered up, they all set off. Though, since Cindel and Wicket are the youngest ones there, they are allowed to ride in a special tent-like compartment strapped to a horse’s back.

The first Ewok the group end up seeking out is Chukha-Trok, who I gather is a renowned Ewok warrior who works as a woodcutter, considering how the movie introduces him. He ends up felling a tree that just narrowly misses Cindel. Which immediately puts Chukha-Trok on Mace’s bad side. So Mace isn’t pleased when Deej offers Chujha-Trok the Ivory Tooth, offering the Ewok woodcutter a place in their company. At first, however, Chukha-Trok doesn’t seem willing to go, until Mace starts insinuating that he’s not a real warrior. Which obviously is a huge insult to Chukha-Trok’s pride. This leads to Mace challenging Chukha-Trok to an ax-throwing contest. A contest that Chukha-Trok quickly wins. As a result, Mace begins to respect Chukha-Trok, and he asks him to help them find their parents. This time, Chukha-Trok decides to join the caravan. I do have to give Mace a bit of credit here, to be honest. While his transition from being dismissive of Chukha-Trok to respecting him as a brave warrior might have occurred a bit too quickly, this was obviously the movie’s attempt at giving him some character development.

Next, they visit Kaink, an Ewok Priestess and the only female apart from Cindel. Her totem is, of course, the Crystal. Kaink agrees to join, on one condition- the children have to pass some kind of magical test. But this test is not exactly clear. Kaink places the Crystal totem in Mace’s hands and it transforms into a lizard, which he drops in shock. Then, when Cindel picks the lizard up, it transforms into a mouse. Apparently, this is enough to convince Kaink to join the rescue mission. But it’s not clear what this magic test was. The crystal becomes a lizard and then the lizard turns into a mouse? So what? What was this supposed to convey? The all-knowing Narrator is completely silent on the matter, offering no explanation. So if anyone from the die-hard Star Wars fan base can offer any insight on what this was, I would love to hear it.

Of course, that’s not the only time the Narrator fails to explain things. At some point, the group stops to rest and Mace notices a nearby lake. For some reason, the sight of his reflection in the water makes him curious and he tries to touch the lake. The moment his finger makes contact with the surface of the lake, he’s instantly trapped beneath the water. When Cindel sees her brother is in trouble, she calls the other Ewoks to help. They try to extend a rope or a tree branch for Mace to grab so they could pull him out, but the rope and branch are also zapped into the lake the instant they touch the water. But Wicket has the magic Walking Stick he got from Logrey. Only that is able to successfully penetrate the surface of the water, enabling them to successfully pull Mace out. Like with the magic test Kaink performed, we��re not given any clarification on what this lake was, or why it trapped anyone and anything that came in contact with the surface of the lake beneath the water. It’s just something the movie included to add some tension. And to give Wicket’s Walking Stick some significance.

Speaking of scenes that only exist to provide tension, we then get a scene when the Ewoks are getting ready to continue on. Wicket is swinging around on a tree branch, but when he’s told the others are about to leave, he abruptly lets go, which ends up scaring the horse carrying Cindel, prompting the horse to bolt. So Chukha-Trok has to chase after the runaway horse and keep Cindel from getting hurt. Once that crisis is averted, they can continue on their way.

When night falls, the Ewoks end up setting up camp. Out of nowhere, there are a bunch of fairy like creatures flitting around. These creatures are apparently called Wisties, and I guess they were featured in the animated TV show, Ewoks, at some point, but since I only remember watching one episode of that show, I couldn’t say for certain. The Wisties end up catching the attention of Mace and the other Ewoks. Well, all except for Widdle, who steps outside his tent, looks around for a second and then decides to go back to bed. Needless to say, it’s at this point that I found myself really liking Widdle. Anyway, when Cindel comes out of her tent to see what’s going on, the Wisties start to flit around the Candle of Pure Light, which she just happened to be carrying at the time. Noticing their interest in the candle, Cindel places it on the ground, and the Wisties, I guess, get absorbed into the candle and merge into Izrina, the Queen of the Wisties. Once again, we get no explanation as to what just happened, but Queen Izrina ends up joining Mace, Cindel and the Ewoks on their quest.

At long last, after crossing the Desert of Salma (because there’s now a desert on this forest moon), they reach the mountains where the Gorax is supposed to live. But the entrance is hidden from view. That’s when Kaink gestures to Mace, pantomiming him to use the rock he got from Logray. Mace sheepishly admits he threw the rock away, much to Chukha-Trok’s exasperation. Fortunately, Wicket then reveals he’d picked up the rock after Mace dropped it. When Mace thankfully takes his rock back, he finds out that it’s actually hollow and that something is inside the rock. He throws it to the ground, revealing this arrowhead. The arrowhead, as if pulled by a magnet, slides across the ground and slips under a particular stone on the base of the mountain. Which indicates that this is where the entrance is. Mace ends up using his blaster to blow up the stone blocking the entrance. Okay, who gave this 14-year-old kid a blaster so powerful, it can blow up a stone? And if they had blasters with this much capability, why didn’t they ever utilize it during the Original Trilogy?

So they enter the cave, and it’s decided that Widdle, Wicket and Cindel should hang back, on account of them being the youngest members of the caravan. Widdle in particular isn’t happy about being left behind, but he still abides by the group’s decision. As such, Deej, Weechee, Chukha-Trok, Kaink and Mace continue on while Widdle and Wicket keep Cindel company.

Deej’s group soon come to this seemingly bottomless chasm. Taking note of what is so obviously a spider web stretching across the crevasse, Mace decides to use the web as a bridge, and they start to cross. But as they neglected to observe, where there’s a spider web, there’s most likely a spider. Sure enough, a spider attacks them. Mace strikes back at the spider with a knife, and the spider falls into the abyss. But as Mace and the Ewoks are crossing the divide on the spider web, another spider appears and stars to attack Deej. This time, it’s Kaink who comes to the rescue, as she uses her Crystal totem to hypnotize the spider, resulting in that one to fall into the pit as well. Meanwhile, we see a third spider has found his way to where Cindel, Wicket and Widdle were waiting. This third spider is quickly dealt with thanks to Wicket and Widdle, though.

Eventually, Mace and the Ewoks find the lair of the Gorax, where they see the parents trapped in a cage suspended from the ceiling. But the Gorax is also there, currently eating something. Weechee, partially inadvertently, ends up luring the Gorax out of his lair, allowing the others the chance to free Catarine and Jeremitt. The rescue attempt involves using the Gorax’s ax as a catapult and providing the parents a rope to climb down on. But while the rescue is still being carried out, the Gorax, having lost interest in Weechee, returns. So everyone has to make a run for it. But Chukha-Trok stays behind to face the Gorax, repeatedly striking at the Gorax’s leg with his ax, despite Mace’s attempts at urging him away.

At that moment, Queen Izrina remembers she’s involved in the movie. She’s been hanging out in Mace’s pocket this whole time. At Mace’s request, she flies at the Gorax and disorients the giant by darting around his head. As the Gorax is flaying around, he ends up hitting the sides of his lair, causing a bunch of rocks to fall. Chukha-Trok ends up getting hit by the falling rocks, much to Mace’s shock and horror. Mace runs out to try and help the fallen Ewok, but Chukha-Trok was too gravely injured by the falling rocks and ends up dying in Mace’s arms. Before he dies, Chukha-Trok ends up giving his ax to Mace, which was probably meant to indicate that the two have come full-circle in their relationship and now consider each other as friends. Mace momentarily grieves his friend’s death, but, due in part to the sub-par acting, he gets over it relatively quickly, and he hurries off to rejoin the others.

Meanwhile, the Gorax is trying to go after the other Ewoks, but Catarine and Jeremitt and the Ewoks team up to create a makeshift trip-wire that they use against the Gorax. This almost results in the Gorax to fall into the bottomless pit, but he lands just short of the edge, so he doesn’t fall. It takes the combined efforts of Kaink, who uses her Crystal totem to drop a stalactite onto the Gorax’s head, and Catarine, wielding Mace’s blaster, before the Gorax falls into the crevice to his apparent death.

At this point, the movie seems to be wrapping up. Mace, rejoining the others at this moment, embraces his parents before showing Deej Chukha-Trok’s ax, explaining the warrior’s sacrifice. And then, Cindel appears on the other side of the chasm with Wicket and Widdle. And she’s overjoyed to see her parents safe, and vice versa. However, it turns out the Gorax still has a few hit points left, as he reappears at this point, trying to climb back out of the pit, right in front of Cindel. When the Gorax tries to grab Cindel, Mace jumps into action and throws Chukha-Trok’s ax at the Gorax. The ax lands home in the Gorax’s back, forcing him to fall into the abyss once again. This time, the Gorax is defeated for real. So Cindel is safe, and the Towani family can be properly reunited at last.

The Towani family then travels back the Ewok village with the Ewoks. After Mace bids goodbye to Queen Izrina, thanking her for her help, he rejoins the celebration going on. Because it’s not just the Towani family that’s been safely reunited, but the Ewok family as well. And because of the friendship between the two families, I guess, Deej gives the White Wings of Hope to Cindel. The movie ends with the Narrator delivering one of the cheesiest closing lines ever. About how the movie’s protagonists all learned what they already knew- that courage, loyalty and love were the strongest forces in the universe.

So that was the first Ewok movie. While I can see why I liked it as a kid, now that I’m an adult, I realize that a lot of this movie didn’t make a lot of sense. Obviously, Kid Me was a lot more accepting of stuff. Not only that, it dawned on me how this movie might actually be seen as boring. For the most part, it’s just these two kids interacting and walking around with some Ewoks. In fact, I think it’s safe to say that if you threw Lord of the Rings and Care Bears into a blender and mixed them together, this is pretty much what you’d end up with. But at the same time, this movie is clearly meant for kids. And it must have kept enough kids entertained back in the 80s, because a sequel was released the following year. Check back next week for my review on that one.

(Click here to go back to the directory)

#star wars ewoks #caravan of courage #star wars franchise #star wars review

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littledonkeyburrito · 6 years

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It’s tequila and beer so I shouldn’t be surprised

1. Do you prefer boys to shave down there? I prefer trimmed. I don’t want to feel like I’m fucking a well-endowed 12 year old but I also don’t want to be yanking all his hair out when I’m giving a handjob. Tbh it’s not a strong preference though. He can do what he wants.

2. Do you prefer liquid, mousse or powder foundation? Why? Powder because it feels less gross. I don’t generally wear any makeup though

3. How much does your mother know about your sex life (or lack thereof)? Mum knows a very small amount, but more than Dad knows. She knows I’ve dated two guys, at least.

4. Do you enjoy watching cooking shows? Not my scene

5. Do you worry about gaining weight? I don’t.

6. Have you ever used fake tan? No. In fact, I get a little weirded out when I have a real tan because my hands don’t look like my hands

7. How do you organize your make-up? There isn’t much. Doesn’t really need organising

8. Do you ever look at someone cute, and automatically make a move? No. Except maybe if I’m extremely drunk...

9. Do you live in a house, apartment, or another type of arrangement? Apartment

10. What’s one event your town has that you don’t like to participate in? I don’t know all of Barcelona’s festivities. Brisbane has the Ekka which is fun. Things I don’t like to participate in would probably be sporting events like marathons and such.

11. Are any of your siblings married? What are their spouses’ names? No.

12. Does your father have any creepy or scary friends you don’t like? A couple of Dad’s friends are slightly seedy but just in a regular old white dude way, not in a legit creepy way. They’re all fairly nice.

13. Do you watch any shows that you know your parents wouldn’t approve of? Yeah, Dad hates almost everything American.

14. What venue was the last real concert you went to at? Some showground in Madrid for a music festival.

15. Does your best friend and their mom have the same last name? Yes. Well, half. She has both parents’ last names.

16. What color is your cellphone? Black

17. Are you currently waiting for a phone call? From whom? Yes, I was supposed to get a call back from my health insurance company today. I’ll have to call them again tomorrow. At least I have a number to the english customer service line now.

18. Do you have any drugs in your bedroom? No

19. Is there a feature on your face that people compliment you on? Occasionally eyes I guess

20. What are your plans for the rest of the week? Figuring out how to get my luggage to weigh less than when I came to this country so I don’t have to pay extra baggage fees.

21. How many studded belts do you own? None.

22. Has your boyfriend/girlfriend ever had braces? Don’t have a partner.

23. What have you eaten today?   Spicy rice soup, tabooleh, a mandarin, some chocolate

24. What’s your favorite thing to do? The thing that comes to mind is having dinner or drinks with my friends, possibly because I haven’t been able to do that for a year.

25. Did you wear a jacket today? Yes, I wore my coat when I went out

26. Have you kissed more than two people of the same sex? Yeah.

27. How many times have you had sex in one day? Twice

28. Did you exercise at all today? Not on purpose

29. Would you ever move far away for a job opportunity? That’s the plan. Once I’m back in Australia I’m going to be applying for jobs in Spain and Central America in my field and if I get offered something with a liveable salary then I’ll move.

30. Are you too shy/embarrassed to tell people your middle name? No

31. If not, what is it? No bc internet

32. What day of the week is garbage day on your street? Three times every day.

33. What is something new you learned today? That my grocery store sells pigs ears, and that the drink “desperados” does not taste good (it’s tequila and beer so I shouldn’t be surprised)

34. Do you need a haircut? Yes

35. Can you say the alphabet backwards? If I try

36. When was the last time you ate popcorn? It’s been a while. I finally learned that popcorn is not worth the dry cracked lips and the kernel shells stuck in my teeth and gums for all eternity

37. Do you like eating out at restaurants? Cheap restaurants. The more expensive they get, the less I enjoy the atmosphere.

38. Is your name common? In Australia it is, but not in Spain.

39. Do you look older or younger than your actual age? Younger. I got asked ID the other day for the first time in like 6 months. And also a cab driver thought I was 16.

40. Were you ever a Pokemon fan? Yes

41. If you could get rid of one season, which one would you choose? Six

42. Have you ever performed in front of a large group? Yes

43. Are you hungry right now? No, I’ve eaten so much today

44. Have you ever had the chicken pox? My brother got the chicken pox during the school holidays with the whole fever, mild hallucinations, etc. So mum went and got me the vaccine (the last needle I was ever scared of bc in the end it wasn’t so bad). Then I got the spots start to show up and school had just started again so I got 4 days off school. We later found out that because of the needle I wasn’t contagious at all. I never had a fever or illness at all, just the itchy spots. My brother was pissed. 44. How often do you do laundry? About once a week.

45. Do you know anyone who snores? Both my parents, the last guy I slept with, this one guy I was friends with in school. Nobody else immediately comes to mind. 46. Would you make a good movie critic? No, I’m too nice. 47. What goal are you aiming for this year? Pay off debt and start saving again so I get the fuck out of Brisbane again within a year or two. 48. What’s the farthest you’ve walked? In one day? I think about 25-30km 49. What does your favorite shirt look like? I think my current fave would be my dark red tshirt with little white birds on it. I also like my denim button-up and my netflix tshirt 50. What made you feel most accomplished in you’re life so far? Being able to earn enough money in a job that I love to be able to move to Europe for a year after learning a whole new language. 51. What can’t you afford but wish you could? I can’t afford to stay in Spain :(

Last 10 people in your Facebook messages inbox: (I’m excluding group chats)

1. Joh

2. Me (had to write a number while on the phone and didn’t have a pen)

3. Kym

4. Emily

5. Bronwyn

6. Dad

7. Aman

8. Pegler

9. Leisa

10. Brenda

1. How long have you known 1? 4 years

2. When did you meet 2? At birth

3. When was the last time you saw 3? Yesterday

4. Have you and 4 ever gotten into trouble together before? No

5. How old is 5? 47

6. Have you ever taken a shower at 6’s house? Many, because I grew up in that house

7. Have you ever taken a dump at 7’s house? Lol, no.

8. Have you ever thought about going out with 8? No

9. What about 9? She’s my auntie

10. Would you ever go out with 10 or ask 10 out? No, she’s my dad’s friend

11. What’s the best memory you have had with 1? Too many to choose just one

12. What’s 2′s lastname? yeah nah

13. Would you ever take a bullet for 3? Probs not, soz

14. What would you do if 4 died? I'd be sad

15. What would you do if you found out 5 killed someone that you were related to? That would be horrible since we’re related to the same people

16. Would you take care of 6 if they were sick? Yes

17. Would you kill 7 if it was the only way for your other friends to survive? Yeah... if it was the only way then I would

18. Has 8 ever cooked for you? We lived together for 3 years but I don’t think so..? Maybe we occasionally offered each other leftovers but we never specifically cooked for each other

19. How many times have you and 9 fought? Never in my memory

20. Have you and 10 ever cried together? No

21. Have you and 1 ever kissed? Lol yes every time we get drunk together

22. Do you ever dream of 2? Almost always

23. Is 3 a boy? No.

24. Does 4 have any kids? No

25. Do you want to marry 5? I do not want to marry my aunt 26. How did you meet 1? At an event we were both at and then we ran in the same circles

27. What was your first impression of 2? I do not remember when I became self-aware 28. Would you ever date 3? No. She is my dad’s married friend with 3 kids 29. Are 4 and 5 friends? They have never met

30. Who is 6 going out with? Sharon, who he lives with 31. Is 7 a boy or girl? I feel weird calling him a “boy” because I used to sleep with him. He is a man. Aman, a man. A man called Aman. 32. What would you think if 8 became your stepbrother/sister? I don’t think either of his parents are a suitable match for my parents but he’d be a kickass brother 33. Is #9 a dork? No, not really

34. What is a random fact about #10? She’s Irish 35. Who does #1 have a crush on? Probably his boyfriend 36. Does #2 have any stalkers? No, I don’t 37. If #3 said they were in love with you, what would you say? It would be very inappropriate and I would say that it makes me uncomfortable.

38. Is #4 hott? I’m sure her husband thinks so. She is pretty though. 39. Who is #5 best friends with? idk 40. Does #6 have good fashion sense? Not especially, but if he tried to dress young he’d look worse. What he wears works for him. 41. Is #7 single? I think so. If he’s not then I’d wonder why he’s messaging me and saying he wants to meet up when I’m back. 42. Would #8 and #9 make a cute couple? God no

#Other potential titles:#my hands don’t look like my hands #kernel shells stuck in my teeth and gums for all eternity #a cab driver thought I was 16 #I do not remember when I became self-aware #A man called Aman

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peaky-yamyam · 7 years

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Breakfast - John Shelby

- @johnsheiby “Show me what’s behind your back.” With John please x - John Shelby 24 plz ( “It’s six o’clock in the morning, you’re not having vodka.” ) - Please do more like suit up, I've read part one and 2 and love them. Do more with the family please!!

Despite the sun only recently rising, John and I have been awake for hours. A grizzly baby, a sick dog and six other children who never miss an opportunity to be out of bed means that our house has dissolved in chaos.

“Want me to have Dotty?” John asks, glancing at me from the floor as I cradle Dotty to my chest.

“You're just offering because you don't want to clean up the dog sick.”

He flops back on his knees, knocking the bucket of soapy water away from him.

“There's just so much of it babe, I mean the dogs not exactly big is It? Where the fuck has all this come from?”

“He's ill!” I say with a chuckle, kicking the bucket back towards him. “It's just a bit of sick, most of its congealing now anyway, should be able to scoop it right up.”

He pales and gags a little, clutching the cloth tightly as if it'll somehow protect him.

“You know what, i’m glad you're finding this funny.”

“Oh John, I'm just focusing on the massive glass of vodka I'm going to have when she-” I nod at Dotty who’s balling my nightdress in her fist and whining despite her closing eyes, “-goes back to sleep.”

“Are you having a laugh? It’s six o’clock in the morning, you’re not having vodka. Besides, it's going to be fucking havoc out there, just because we've locked ourselves in here and can't see them, doesn't mean the others are behaving.”

“They do seem rather quiet…” I comment, only now noticing the strange calmness that seems to have taken over the rest of the house. “Everything alright in there?” I shout through to the kitchen, not daring to look.

“Yes!” comes an immediate response from the six of them.

“Anyone hurt?”

“No!”

“Have you made a mess?”

“No!”

John looks to me with a smirk.

“You know what that means don’t you? They have fucking destroyed that kitchen. Harry’s probably emptied the cupboards again… Wouldn’t surprise me if Bill’s scaling the walls trying to reach the biscuit tin-”

“Go and see what they’re doing,” I interrupt, visions of the destroyed garden and the days of work it took to sort it rushing back to me.

“No no no, I’m cleaning this,” he replies, dunking the cloth in the bucket of water.

“You’re fucking not, you’ve been trying to get out of it for the last fifteen minutes!” I start to argue, but when he turns away and starts scrubbing at the floor, I realise I’m never going to win, so I turn with a huff and head for the stairs.

“Right you lot,” I call over my shoulder, “I’m going to put Dotty back in bed and then I’m coming into the kitchen, so you’ve got one minute to sort out whatever’s going on in there, you understand?”

I hear a scuffle and a few mumbles between them before they all shout back, “yes mom!”

Thankfully Dotty settles quickly, and I spend a few seconds appreciating the quiet before I head to the chaos that has undoubtedly consumed the kitchen.

I shout another warning as I reach the bottom of the stairs but this one is met with silence and as I throw open the kitchen door it takes me a second to realise that there’s no actual mess. Sure there’s some pots and pans in the sink and the counters are dirty, but on the table sits two plates of scrambled egg on toast, a pot of tea with two cups and a single flower - that I’m fairly sure is from the neighbours garden - in one of my grandmother's antique bone china vases.

“What is this?” I ask, completely dumbstruck with the scene in front of me.

“We made you and dad breakfast,” Marcy says, hands clasped behind her back, clearly incredibly proud of her handy work. “Well me and Jack did most of it, Billy and Katie sorted the flower. James and Harry just sort of sat there and played with the burnt bits of toast.”

“Well it looks absolutely lovely, so thank you, all of you. But…umm... why have you made us breakfast?” Despite loving the kids to pieces, I’m not so blinded to think this is anything other than a way to get on our good side.

“It was Jack’s idea.”

“Was it now? Jack, why have you made us breakfast?”

He pales a little and keeps his hands clasped tightly behind his back his jaw tensing as he tries to think how to reply.

“Because... I love you?” he answers after some deliberation.

“You know what Jack, I actually might have fallen for that, if you hadn’t just asked it as a question. JOHN!”

John rushes in, but freezes as he takes in what’s going on.

“What is this?” he asks eventually.

“The kids have made us breakfast,” I answer. “It was Jack’s idea. Because he loves us? He thinks, he doesn’t seem that sure though.”

John’s face drops and he turns his attention to Jack.

“What have you done?” he questions.

“Nothin’!” Jack shouts back, far too quickly for it to be the truth.

“What’s behind your back?” I cut in, noticing him fiddling with something nervously.

“It’s nothin’. I’ve not done nothin’...”

“Show me what’s behind your back.”

“It’s… it’s just a letter… from school…”

He begrudgingly pulls the envelope from behind his back and I can see from the other side of the table that it’s wax sealed with a neat script on the front addressing it to Mr and Mrs J Shelby. Never a good sign.

John nudges me, a prompt that he feels I’m the best one to deal with this and I take the letter from Jack.

“I assume you know what this is about?”

He nods.

“Well before I open this and read it for myself, do you want to explain what’s going on?”

He clamps his bottom lip between his teeth and takes a deep breath.

“I’vebeenexpelled,” he mumbles, but John and I both catch it.

John grabs the letter from me and tears it open, scanning it quickly.

“He fucking has as well,” he says, handing the letter back so I can see for myself, before he starts pacing the room. “Fucking expelled! Expelled from a school I managed to make it through! That Arthur manage to make it through. Jesus Christ boy what the hell did you do?”

I seem to have read more of the letter than John has and managed to make it to a very eloquent description of the exact reason for his expulsion.

“He set up a load of rigged boxing fights, which he was getting the other kids bet on…” I explain through gritted teeth.

“No-one got hurt I swear, not properly. It was only kids who wanted to fi-” Jack interrupts.

“Go to your room Jack. I’ll deal with you later, and believe me you are in big trouble. Marcy, Katie, Billy, thank you for helping to make us breakfast, but can you go and play in the other room please - take the little’uns - I need to talk to your dad.”

They all file out and when we’re alone I turn on John, who’s sat at the table with his head in his hands.

“Well at least-” he starts, but I don’t give him the chance to continue.

“Shut up. This is all your fault you know that?”

“This isn’t because of the hair-”

“This is exactly because of the haircut! He thinks he’s a fucking Peaky Blinder now. And what a classic Peaky Blinder thing to do. A rigged boxing ring for fucks sake...”

“You’ve got to give it to him-”

“John! Stop! You do not get to be proud of your eleven year old son setting up fights between his classmates! What are we going to do with him now? He can’t leave school at eleven. He's going to end up working with you lot- oh god, he’s going to end up like Michael. And I’m going to end up like Polly, at my whits end every time he walks out the door. I thought I had a few more years to prepare, he’s still a little boy John, he needs to be at school!” I babble, only stopping when John grasps my shoulders and forces me to look at him.

“Calm down, I will sort this. I’ll get him back in school, I promise you, okay?”

I’ve learnt now that when John promise he’ll sort something, one way or another, it gets sorted and I trust him to fix this.

“Okay,” I answer.

“Good, now sit down and lets eat this while everything’s calm for a minute.”

#peaky blinders fanfiction #peaky blinders fanfic #peaky blinders imagine #John Shelby #john shelby fanfiction #john shelby imagine #john shelby fanfic

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ostermahaus · 7 years

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It’s Morphin’ Time! Eventually... Power Rangers Review

Saban’s Power Rangers opens darkly. You see a blasted torn up landscape of prehistoric Earth with the Red Ranger dragging himself across it, obviously injured. He crawls to the Yellow Ranger, also lying prone who morphs into an alien and hands her coin to him, telling him to hide it before dying in his arms. Yikes. He morphs into Zordon (Bryan Cranston) and puts his coin with the others he’s carrying, instructing Alpha via communicator to fire a meteorite at his current location. He turns to find himself face to face with a female Green Ranger named Rita (Elizabeth Banks) who he accuses of being a traitor and killing his team. She boasts that she’s won when Zordon informs her it’s too late and a meteor comes crashing down on them sending her to the bottom of the sea. Also wiping out the dinosaurs, I presume. I guess nuking from orbit was the only way to be sure. Smash cut to a bunch of jocks leading a bull into a locker room as a prank and we meet Jason Scott (Dacre Montgomery) who informs us that he calmed the cow down by milking it. Womp womp. Your protagonist can’t tell an udder from a dong, not a great start. The cops show up and after the most nausea inducing go-pro car chase I’ve ever encountered (Seriously, I saw Gravity on the UltraScreen in 3D and this almost made me vomit) he gets in a horrific wreck and we have a title screen. Go go Power Rangers? If you never watched the show this may seem exciting. If you did, well here’s why it might not be what you were expecting.

Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers hit children in 1993 with a blast of popularity that overpowered the Ninja Turtles and kept kids riveted until Pokemon came along at the end of the decade! A Japanese import, it was cheesy, silly, campy and formulaic and pre-teens ate it up! As well as some teens. I was just hitting the age where I felt like I was outgrowing Saturday morning/after school shows (Thank God that phase didn’t last) so I was never a die hard fan, but I knew enough people that were that I kept abreast of the original shows run. I watched a fair number of episodes with my friends more due to our love of riffing it a la Mystery Science Theater 3000 than anything else… Although I will admit that Kimberly (Amy Jo Johnson) kept me on board a bit as well. The premise was simple. Five teenagers from Angel Grove are given magic coins that allow them to morph into Power Rangers. Spandex clad ninjas with full coverage helmets who can summon robot dinosaurs called Zords and merge them Voltron style into a giant Mega Zord to win the day. They answer to Zordon, a giant holographic head, and fight the monsters that Rita Repulsa repeatedly sends down from the moon. Ninjas, dinosaurs and giant robots. It was famous for the obvious cut between the American actors doing their day to day thing and the original Japanese footage being used once they were in costume. Ever wonder why Kimberly was the only Ranger wearing a skirt? Because the Yellow Ranger in that Japanese footage is a dude. (The more you know!) That’s all you needed and it’s still on the air in some iteration to this day! Why mess with a good thing? If it’s not broke, right?

Unfortunately Hollywood is following a current and overused trend of trying to make things dark and gritty when they reboot them right now. That’s not to say it can’t work, but it really feels like a forced excutive decision by the movie companies some times. This new Power Rangers update has a lot of things that work really well for it as they try to make a serious and less campy approach to one of the most popular cheese fests ever. They also make some big missteps. I know that Zordon famously asked for “teenagers with attitude” in the original and wound up with the nicest kids in town, but this version makes an over correction by having three of them meet in detention and one of them just not go to school at all. Turns out Jason has to wear an ankle bracelet now and report to detention for the rest of the year and lost all sorts of football scholarships. As soon as he walks in he sees Billy (RJ Cyler) being bullied for OCD behavior arranging things on his desk. Jason puts a stop to it and Billy immediately declares him his new best friend for sticking up for him! I really liked Billy in this movie, but they make a very clear point early on to have him state that he’s on the autism spectrum and they play it pretty well until he becomes a Ranger. Then it just seems to disappear and he’s merely giddy all the time. He’s adorkable, sure, and probably the most likeable character but it would have been nice to see them stick to his spectrum tendencies. Jason is fairly dismissive until he offers to use his skills to hack Jason’s ankle bracelet in order for them to hang out. How all true friendships begin!

Next we meet Kimberly Heart (Naomi Scott) who was set up by her cheerleader ‘friends’ for an incriminating picture that’s been circulating around school and they show up to inform her that she no longer gets to be a plastic. It makes her so angry that she gives herself a kicky new haircut in the bathroom that Jason is immediately smitten by when she returns from the restroom! After Billy hacks the ankle device, he and Jason go into a restricted area of the gold mine outside Angel Grove because apparently Billy likes to blast there. Even though it’s an active mine with security. Shrug While Billy is setting his charges, Jason goes off to hike around and spies Kimberly cliff diving while We get Zack (Ludi Lin) and Trini (Becky G.) dropped in as just random kids who are also hanging out in an active work zone after dark. Her to practice her Karate Kid poses and him to watch her through binoculars. Like you do. Anyway, Billy’s blast draws them all and they discover 5 glowing coins embedded in the rock. After cutting them out, they each grab one and then alarms go off, summoning security and another slightly less vomit inducing chase that AGAIN ends in a horrific crash, this time with a train. The next morning they all wake up at home with no injuries and no knowledge of how they survived the wreck, plus sick abs and super strength! Wanna know how they managed that without being seen? Or what Billy’s mom’s reaction is to the destruction of HER van? (You see the wreck later on being pulled off the tracks) You’re out of luck! Anyway, they get together and decide to go back to try to find answers about the coins and discover a buried spaceship manned by Alpha 5 (Bill Hader) and Zordon’s memory in the ship’s computer. He informs them that they’re the Power Rangers and they need to learn to defend the universe once they can learn to morph! Eventually…

I don’t know if it came with the casting of Bryan Cranston but the biggest drawback of this film is that at 2 hours almost every minute of the Rangers suited up has been shown in the trailers because it only happens in the films final action scene, similar to my beef with Godzilla not having enough Godzilla. There are training montages aplenty and I really did appreciate the effort it made to give the core cast some substance behind there characters that wasn’t there before, but it’s pace could best be described as deliberate. The film seems to work the best when it’s trying to have some fun and not brooding so much, which is all too often. The scene of all the nerd kids idolizing Billy after he knocks out a bully without trying and then being in awe when he gets pulled from the table by Kimberly? Great! Fun little scene, use more moments like that as opposed to repeated instances of people mispronouncing Trini as DeeDee. ??? I assume it’s a joke but I just don’t get it and boy do they keep pushing it. I wish they had done more with Zack as he had a lot of potential in his backstory. He doesn’t attend school any more because you find out he’s caring for his terminally ill mother but aside from that reveal he just gets all the “I’m gonna shout quips!” style lines. Don’t try taking a drink every time he calls Trini “Crazy Girl”, it won’t end well. Jason is fine in his role as the leader, but as is the curse of the leader role (Cyclops, Leonardo), is pretty bland. Kimberly and Trini are both solid female role models although I wish they would have come right out with Trini’s sexuality/crush on Kimberly rather than just heavily alluding to it. Although I was disappointed by him dropping the autism traits halfway through, I thought Billy in the second half was the most relatable character. He’s just so giddy every time they bring up the fact they get to be Rangers!

I was not a fan of the design choices for Alpha and the Zords. Alpha was thankfully less obnoxious than the original, but his super long arms on the tiny body just looked weird and creepy. Props to Hader for making me not hate him! The Zords… I couldn’t tell what I was looking at. I’ll be honest, aside from the T-Rex and the Pterodactyl they could have been anything. I had to go online after the movie because I couldn’t remember if the Triceratops was Blue or Black because I couldn’t tell them apart. Turns out it’s Blue. For as many montages as we were dealt and given the movies run time, I’d have preferred to see them learning their suits and Zords right off the bat as opposed to trying and failing to Morph a half dozen times and then finally getting it right just in time for the final battle where they go in operating things they’ve never used before. I know I’m overthinking it, but I hate when people just innately know how to use things like that.

Lastly we come to the villains. I’ve got really mixed feelings on this part. I appreciate they wanted to take it more seriously, and I like what they did with Rita but DAMN. They may have made her a bit too intense for the audience that’s generally associated with Power Rangers! Banks is great and and she is wonderfully creepy and terrifying but there is a scene where she’s killed some police officers and you see that she’s ripped the teeth out of one and has dismembered/is CANNIBALIZING the other. This is while she’s still in her slightly mummified state after a fishing boat pulls up her body and it’s horror movie levels of creepy as she gets her power back to create Goldar. Because he’s made of gold, see? I don’t quite get her power set because at first she’s brutally murdering people for their gold, then eating it (WTF?) then just pointing at it and drawing it to her in liquid form. At least she gets to say “Make my monster grow.”

Overall, it’s not bad. It’s not as action packed as you’d expect, but what references do show up are all well placed and fun. You get some cameos and throwback lines. Ay-yi-yi and what not. My favorite reference was when two boys were arguing who got to be the Red Ranger while they’re playing and Trini tells them, “Why not Yellow?” “That’s a girl!” “How do you know?” lol Love the message and the nod to the original Yellow I mentioned earlier, but unfortunately undercut by the obvious sculpted boob armor on Pink and Yellow… Best moment, bar none, was when they played the original theme. Unfortunately it’s just one refrain then back to generic orchestration, but the theater I was in was electrified when it came on! I’m not made of stone, that riff is freaking amazing. You could tell everyone was a bit bummed when it didn’t continue throughout the fight. As usual anymore, stay through the credits. There’s a mid credit scene that I’m pretty sure you’ll be able to call before it happens but it’s there. LOL at the guys behind me talking loudly throughout the film complaining about the very thing the scene was about and leaving before it happened. That’s what you get for being terrible movie attendants! If you were a fan of the show as a kid, I think you’ll have a great time! If you’re bringing your kids because of how much YOU loved it… Just be aware it gets really dark and creepy in places and might move a bit slow if they have to wait over 90 minutes to see any Morphin’ Time.

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todokori-kun · 7 years

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OK TBH I DON’T PLAY OTOME GAMES

(don’t play any kind of game really, except for the occasional farming game when I’m bored) AND I’VE ALWAYS FELT SO AWKWARD BECAUSE I’M ACTUALLY KOREAN AND YET IT’S LIKE EVERYONE ON THE INTERNET BUT ME HAS PLAYED MYSTIC MESSENGER

but wow, that looks pretty. And it sounds really cool. Also it’s free?

You know what, I might try that out. I’ll definitely let you know if I do :D

WHAT? You dropped TG? Right when one of the recent chapters had an Urie/Saiko moment??? (like dude I totally understand your frustration but just, if you’re going to drop TG drop it after you read that scene- Saiko basically acknowledges that the CCG has turned into a slaughterhouse and she doesn’t want to be a part of it anymore (she says that if push comes to shove, she’ll become a terrorist and leave the CCG). Urie acts like he’s still a coldhearted jerk who only cares about the job and Saiko gets mad at him before running out of the house.

Urie goes to find her and they sit on swings at a playground together, apologizing and talking things over. Urie eventually says that if things don’t work out, they’ll just become terrorists (an echo of Saiko’s earlier words) and Saiko gives this really cute smile it’s just ughhh <3333)

OH Food Wars! I’ve heard of it ^^ I don’t like Echhi so I probably won’t watch it though (anime fanservice in general is something I don’t really like. Like, if it’s meant to be a pure fanservice series then that’s fine, I probably wouldn’t watch something like that in the first place- but when an anime/manga with a decent plot and interesting concepts decides to go and ruin all that with awkward panty shots and weird anatomy that’s just. not my thing lol).

Tatsuo is definitely a glorious bastard.

(I’m doodling him and Naomi a lot nowadays and no matter how I draw them you could never tell that they’re siblings. Naomi just looks like a sweet, average girl and Tatsuo looks like the lovechild of Greedling and Kimblee.

Also, I don’t have that much good art to show you right now, but I’ll probably be able to send some tomorrow or the day after (warning: it’s still not good, and this isn’t just me being insecure) :D)

Yep, I’m on volume two now (or was it three?) and it’s darker than it looks…it’s fun, though! I started it for Hisoka but I’m liking the main characters way more than I thought I would. Gon and Leorio are probably my favorites (Gon=the MC, sweet little boy with amazing instincts. Leorio=one of Gon’s friends, pretends that he wants to become a ‘Hunter’ just for the money but it actually goes deeper than that: his friend was ill but Leorio didn’t have enough money to pay for his treatment and the friend died. Then Leorio decided to become a doctor so he could help people like his friend, but he realized that he needed even MORE money to complete all the necessary studying/training to become a doctor. That’s his real reason for wanting to become rich.).

I just finished Volume 26 of the manga! Only one more volume to go 0.0

Scar’s development is awesome. Everyone’s development is really good (and I don’t actually dislike anybody other than the obvious ones (AKA Father)!).

TRUTH: I am the original Dwarf in the Flask. I write cutesy/angsty headcanons and revel in the reactions from you common, weak humans…

(Question, though: which FMA character do you think you’re like, personality-wise?

For me, I know this is weird but I relate to older!Hohenheim. (I relate to Al too but Al is way nicer than me so Hohenheim it is.)

I think Queen Luna is a bit like Winry + Al + Ed + Riza? idk, who do you relate to?)

Roy: ‘so, guys with long hair…’

*casually glances around the room*

*sees Ed, who’s decided to unbraid his hair and just keep it down for a while*

*smiles sweetly with murderous intent*

“Fullmetal! Would you mind getting a haircut?”

(tbh I ship Roy/Luna. A lot. And I think I sorta ship Greed(ling)/Luna too.)

Water alchemy is definitely useful. Though Air alchemy would be pretty powerful too…

However, I think I’d actually like to specialize in Medicinal Alchemy. I’d also like to learn Alkahestry :)

Queen Luna, are you trying to kill me. Seriously. I’m interally screaming right now. That’s cute as heck omg (tbh Scar-Evans, no matter what kind of relationship, would always be supremely awkward at first. Scar’s naturally silent and stern, Evans WANTS to talk to everyone but is just too shy and anxious lol (like on the outside I’m really quiet but on the inside it’s just “I can just say hi, that won’t be so bad- who am I kidding I’ll totally mess it up what am I going to say AFTER I say hi? Huh? HUH? Evans do you have a Plan B? That’s what I thought you moron, you really have no idea what to do in this situation we’re DOOMED”)

I’d probably get along well with Mei and Xiao-Mei tho.)

Yeah, I know I should appreciate how hard mangakas work to draw/write these mangas, but I did feel the tiniest bit disappointed…we waited a month for this. But maybe it’s because there are actually a lot of 'casual’ fans who don’t know about the 2CT and Yana need to confirm it (also Yana actually might not know how popular the 2CT is? And someone who doesn’t know the 2CT could totally think that Real Ciel is a clone or something).

The one new-ish thing that I learned from this chapter is that it’s getting harder to trust Tanaka XD

But yeah, the art improvement is amazing! Kuro had great detail from the very first chapter but now, I could just stare at some of the panels for hours.

That. Is awesome. Smol Nick Fury is my new spirit animal

And that’s great! I haven’t seen Homecoming yet but I’m planning to (I’m late because my little sister wants to watch it with me but she’s not done with Civil War yet. Speaking of, have you seen Civil War?).

*gasps* you do not know the glory that is otome games? You wound me, my dear Evans ;-; Just kidding, it’s your choice completely :)

OH GOD MYSTIC MESSENGER. That game is hell. It’s an amazing game, but it takes over your life considering it’s based on real time. I LOST SO MUCH SLEEP OVER IT T_T But I regret nothing.

Because look at this cutie.

Yep, it’s completely free! On Steam! Here’s the link!

I’ve finished 2 more routes!

This guy, Rod. He’s an asshole. Most of the time I was playing, I had the urge to stick my middle finger up at the screen. He honestly infuriates me so much.

Aand this guy, Rumpel. He’s… okay I guess. A huuge flirt, who has amnesia. His most notable moment in the game: MC (the character you play as) is sick. His response? ‘I guess you’re missing’

I honestly wanted to punch the screen.

Oh, and there’s this queen:

my heart

Well, two more routes left, I’ll get to them tomorrow or the day after that ^^

GODDAMNIT I WAS TRYING TO DROP IT =3= I guess I’ll have to read the chapter, then, since Urie/Saiko. Damn it.

I want to see those two become terrorists together. I really do.

Yeah, Food wars is like that. It had a decent premise, but then it decides that eating delicious food is the most erotic thing ever. In other words, lots of shots that are barely censored! It was actually pretty annoying. Well, I dealt with it, because I try not to drop anime when I start *guiltily looks at TG*

AAAAH I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE THE ART! I’m so excited :3 And don’t worry, in comparison to my art, I’m sure it’s flawless.

Interesting… I might start to read it soon ^^

Oooh, so you’re near the end! What’s the last thing that happened? So i can estimate the amount of feels left for you to experience huehuehue There’s a lot of them in the end. I always cry. Help.

How could I not see it? Of course you’re the dwarf! I was blind all along!

The moment I read your question, my mind shouted this: ALPHONSE ELRIC WITHOUT A DOUBT.

Yep, no doubt about it.

I suppose you are a bit like Hoenheim, though…

Honestly, I mostly relate to Riza (mostly in the ‘I’m so done w Mustang’ part hahahah (but I also love snipers, they’re really cool)), but with Al’s random fawning over cuteness hahah But I’m glad you also think of Winry, since I really admire as a character. She’s quite strong willed.

Ed is traumatised that day. What did he do to deserve the colonel hating his hair

True, true, if you used a transmutation circle like Roy’s glove to change the concentration of the air around the target, you could make it quite lethal.

I can see him stumbling on to you playing the piano at some point and just staying silent, because he knows how easily nervous you get and he honestly loves how peaceful you are at that moment. Probably makes a subtle comment later, so he doesn’t fluster you too much. And then a certain water alchemist comes and starts blabbering about random gibberish, coaxing you out of your shell and he happens to come into the room (totally not because someone told him to come) and is like ????? because at this point he was convinced you’re shy around everyone. From that day on, he makes it a point to try and get close to you.

Mei is adorable! Her perception of Ed in the beginning is one of the best parts of the whole show. Just, wow.

Mm, probably. I still feel a bit disappointed =3= Well, I guess we’ll just have to wait until the next chapter. And I’m definitely more weary of Tanaka now. But I honestly hate how RC is treating OC like a child. It’s infuriating, since OC has shown over and over that he’s capable of handling things on his own (also we need their names, now. Please. I’m tired of calling them RC and OC)

Y’all motherfuckers don’t know nothing. But Tony’s salt. Shut your whore mouth Bruce. Who’s the blond napping on Tony’s arm tho? I can’t figure it out ;-;

Nope, not yet ^^;;;;;;;; I’ll watch it soon?

But Peter is such a sweet cinnamon roll, I cry. Just. He tries so hard and somehow always screws up. My heart hurts for him.

ALSOALSO I’m going to dye my hair red tomorrow :3c It’s temporary, but I’m still excited about it ^^;;

#evans #submission

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