#the last one was my favorite and hey it's my birth year

[marblerequiem0525]

So i slept 4 hours cumulatively last night bc of my wisdom teeth, and i ended up writing 3,848 words off and on between 10pm and 5am

[alloftheimagines]

joel miller | complications

masterlist | tag list

words: 2.9k warnings: 18+ | angst, near death experience, blood, reader has a traumatic birth w/complications, PTSD naturally, joel reminded of sarah's death, newbown baby (yes they can be spooky! but this one is cute and safe), (please just somebody take that poor man's pain away) (or not because then what would we write about?) (also he and ellie are a little estranged like in tlou2) prompt: I was thinking maybe Jackson! Joel era and pregnant reader and then she almost dies while giving birth to the baby! Gives room for a lot of drama and angst, and potential comfort right at the end for our favorite old man. tags: (i know it's been a while since I last posted so let me know if you want to be untagged) @sweetbabygirlsworld @m4tthewmurd0ck @domaniquessidehoe @spideysimpossiblegirl note: you can read this as pedro's joel if you so wish, but i am in my game!joel feels rn

“I can’t do this, Joel.” Your face creased with pain as another contraction wracked through you. You’d known that labour would hurt, of course, but you hadn’t expected it to come on this quickly, and so strong. You hadn’t yet passed the eight-month mark, and you weren’t prepared. Not even a little. You hadn’t even sorted the nursery yet, or found a crib.

Joel held your hand on the floor of your living room, keeping you supported while you braced against the couch. He brushed the hair from your face, calm and unreadable as ever, but even you didn’t miss the way his fingers trembled against your skin. “You got this, baby girl. I know you can.”

“Don’t think you have much of a choice.” Your doctor, one of the few midwives in town, lifted her head. She sat at your feet, peeling off her gloves after your examination. “You’re fully dilated. This baby is coming right now.”

“There’s no time to get to the infirmary?” you questioned, voice rising in panic. The contractions had barely started an hour ago, and sure, you’d left it a little late before confessing that they were getting painful. Ellie had rushed out not fifteen minutes ago to call for your midwife’s help, and now…

Now, the baby was coming, and all you could think was that it wasn’t supposed to be like this. The pregnancy had been a shock to your system. You hadn’t even been sure that Joel would want to go through with it after everything he’d experienced before. But he’d held your hand through each ultrasound, felt your belly for the first kick, and even when you saw fear — dread, even — cross his features, you could easily reassure him that this time was different. This time, it was safe. You’d lived in Jackson for over a year now, and it was the security of the community that had made motherhood feel possible. 

The midwife shook her head. “I’m sorry. You need to start pushing on your next contraction.”

“Oh, god,” you whispered, teeth chattering as the weight of the situation hit you.

“Hey, look at me.” Joel tilted your chin gently. “It’s gonna be just fine, darlin’. You just breathe and push, okay? We’ll do the rest.” 

“Right, just breathe and push,” you muttered. “Of course, you forgot the part about shoving a small human out of my hoo-ha.” 

He smirked, planting a kiss on your forehead. “Oh, right. That little detail.”

“I kinda hate you right now.” Just as you said it, another contraction hit, and your head fell back as you moaned. 

“Push now if you feel like you should!” your midwife reminded. Then, to Ellie: “Go get some clean towels, hon. Lots of ‘em.”

In the doorway, Ellie looked grateful to be given a job and scampered off. 

You did as instructed, dipping your chin into your chest as you pushed, pushed, pushed. A scream ripped through you at the pain it brought, each moment worse than the last. 

“You’re doing so good, baby. So good. She’s gonna be here so soon,” Joel whispered, his grip around you the only thing keeping you tethered to the here and now. 

Dizziness consumed you as your contraction finally eased. “Is she okay?”

“I’m seeing the head.” The midwife beamed. “Just a few more pushes, okay?”

Somehow, you breathed, and you pushed, and you felt your way through the pain as your body broke and mended and then broke again. Joel kept his grip on your hand tight, reassuring, but you saw him bite his lip toward the end and knew that he might have been just as terrified as you. 

The final push finally came, and you sunk back as the newborn's cry rang out.

“She’s here. You did it,” Joel murmured, kissing your clammy temple. He laughed into your skin, the sound of joy and disbelief sending a shiver through you. You tried to lift your head, to see your daughter, but everything felt wrong. Heavy. It still hurt, and black spots dotted your vision. 

“Le’ me see her.” Your words were slurred, your voice far away.

The last thing you heard was Joel calling your name, his voice raw and broken — terrified. 

***

“What’s wrong with her?” he demanded. 

“She’s bleeding too heavily. I need to get her to the infirmary.”  The midwife shook her head, handing him the screaming newborn. His screaming newborn. It had taken months to quell the panic of becoming a father again — not that he had ever truly stopped. Sarah had lived in his heart all these years, and Ellie was his daughter, even if she hated him for what he did. 

He made the mistake of looking at you, and the sight of the blood made him sick. So much of it. There was so damn much of it. He’d seen a lot of people bleed out, but he couldn’t remember ever seeing this much. 

“Shit," he cursed.

He didn’t know when Ellie had returned, but she stood wan and she’ll shocked beside him now.

“Please, take her.” He shoved the baby into her arms before lowering back to his knees to grab your hand. “Don’t you dare do this to me, baby. Not now.” 

“Can you carry her to the infirmary?” the midwife asked desperately.

He didn’t think twice, slipping his arms under your limp body. 

“Joel! She’s gonna be alright, right?” Ellie stuttered, and he heard the panic in her voice, too, as she swayed the baby from side to side, swaddling her in blankets. You were the closest thing Ellie had to a mother. If either of them lost you…

He couldn’t even try to find an answer, as much as he wanted it to be yes.

He gritted his teeth, hauling you up on shaky legs. Thankfully, the infirmary was only a few blocks away, and nobody was there to slow him down so late at night. 

He couldn’t make sense of it. One minute, he’d been settling down for the night after a long patrol shift. The next, you were curled up in pain, claiming the baby was coming. 

“Stay with me,” he pleaded, fingers curling into your old sweater. His old sweater, if he was being particular, but you’d stolen it from him so long ago that it smelled completely of you now: soap and fresh air. Blood. 

He staggered into the infirmary with that smell still in his nostrils, dampness spreading across his hands, and he damn near passed out on the threshold. But he wouldn’t, couldn’t, leave you, even when flashes of him holding Sarah this exact way raced through his mind. Even when a broken sob stuck in his throat, because he was holding on, and you weren’t, and she wasn’t, and why did he always have to be the one to watch the life seep from them? To end the night with nothing but their blood on his hands?

He set you down on the first bed he came to, drawing the alarmed attention of the nurses, who had a moment ago been ready to dose off on their night shift. In such a small community, they weren’t often needed after dark.

Behind him, the midwife called out orders, wheeling you away into the surgery theatre. He watched you disappear into a white-walled room, a tiny thing that never would have sufficed in the old world. 

In the old world, you probably wouldn’t have given birth in a living room. In the old world, he wouldn’t be stiff with a fear he couldn’t control, frozen with memories that refused to ever leave him.

He spun around and felt unsettled to see Ellie cradling the baby, mouth agape with the same cluelessness he felt. His baby. His. He had to be a father now, but he didn’t know how when you weren’t here with him. He felt like that thing he was always losing in his dreams was finally gone for good. Ripped from him one last time.

He couldn’t look at the baby’s cherubic face. Couldn’t even look at Ellie.

He couldn’t remember why he’d been so relaxed just yesterday to think of the little life you’d both been impatiently waiting to begin. Couldn’t remember how he’d found the strength to sing a lullaby to your bump, laughing when a foot kicked his palm as though telling him to shut the hell up. 

What the fuck was he supposed to do now? She was so tiny and pink and new, wrapped in bloody blankets, and he…

“Go give her to one of the nurses,” he whispered. 

“Joel—” Ellie made to protest, but he couldn’t hear it. Wouldn't.

“Ellie,” he snapped. “Go give her to one of the damn nurses. I can’t.”

“Well, you don’t have a fucking choice, because she’s yours now.” Ellie shoved her into his hands without warning. He tensed with the new weight, bile rising in his stomach. No. No. No. Everything he held, he broke. 

But then the baby let out a gurgle, her feet kicking his palm just like the night before when she was still safe in your belly, and he couldn’t keep from looking down at her. Couldn’t keep from seeing you in all her innocent features. Eyes, nose, even the fine tuft of hair on her head. 

“I can clean her down and check she’s doing okay,” a nurse offered, and suddenly, he was reluctant to let her go. 

And then he remembered you, the blood, your motionless body after so long spent screaming, Ellie’s hatred, Tess, Sarah, and he was glad for somebody else to take care of her. The further away that kid was, the better. He was a fucking curse, and she…

He scraped a hand over his face, pacing over to the surgery room. He didn’t dare march in, no matter how badly he wanted to. 

“She’s going to be okay,” Ellie said from behind him gently. “She’s strong, and I’m sure shit like this happens all the time.” 

“I told her we’d be okay,” Joel rasped out, face crumpling finally. “I told her that it would turn out alright, that we could be… That we could make something good here.”

“And you will,” Ellie said. 

He shook his head. “I might as well have killed her my damn self.” He looked down at his bloodied hands as though they weren’t his. They shook more than they ever had before. 

“Stop it! She’s going to make it. She has to!” Ellie’s yell took him aback, piercing in such a quiet, echoey space. She jabbed a finger into Joel’s shoulder. “And you have to hold it together. I know it’s fucking hard, alright, but you don’t get to lose it now! You can’t blame yourself for everything that goes wrong in our lives, Joel! That’s not how it works!”

He swallowed down his own self-loathing, head bowed. “I can’t do it without her,” he whispered. 

The rawness in his voice must have been visceral, because Ellie paused, her eyes filling with tears. 

And then she hugged him, tight enough that he thought maybe she was trying to keep him in one piece. He let out a ragged breath and held her. And then he did what she asked. He tried to hold it together. 

***

You woke to whispers and gurgles and wondered for a moment if you were dreaming. Your lids were heavy, body distant, and you couldn’t quite remember where you were or who was supposed to be with you. 

Until you prised your eyes open and found IVs plugged into your veins. 

“There she is,” a voice said softly. 

You blinked, searching for the source, and found it in a bleary version of Joel. He sat in a chair beside your bed, a tiny baby in his arms. His smile was shaky, distorted, and you didn’t know why. Not until he leaned forward and brushed your hair from your face with his free arm.

“Thought you’d left me there for a second.” 

“Is she okay?” Your throat was hoarse. 

He nodded. “Right as rain. It’s you we were worried about.” 

You frowned, trying to remember. One minute, you were pushing as though your life depended on it, and then the next, you were just… gone. 

“You had a heavy bleed. Needed a transfusion,” Joel explained finally. “But they reckon you’re gonna be okay, thank god.” 

“But she’s okay?” You stared at the baby nestled against his chest, not quite sure how she was here. When had this being growing inside of you become a real, tangible thing? How much of her life had you already missed?

Joel sighed impatiently. “Yes, baby. She’s perfect. Takes after her mom in that department.”

He moved to perch beside you so that you could get a closer look. He was right, of course. She was a little smaller than most newborns, but she was perfect. Pink apple cheeks, wide eyes, tiny fingernails. Looking at her felt like everything had finally fallen into place. You tickled her chin and her lips twitched with something content. Something right.

“How’s it feel, being a daddy again?” you asked gently, looking up at him. 

“Right now, it feels like hell. You can’t go scaring me like that.” He wouldn’t look at you, frown set firmly on his daughter. “Thought I was gonna have a heart attack."

“I’m sorry.” You couldn’t imagine how scared he must have been. After everything, you’d finally thought that danger, terror, was a thing of the past. You’d done a great job of ruining that, even if it wasn’t on purpose. Joel had lost too much before to deal with all this, and you had no idea how you’d cope in his shoes. 

He chuckled. “You’re sorry.” Shook his head. “I ain’t trying to make you apologise for almost dying, darlin’. You don’t gotta worry about me.”

“We said we could do this right,” you whispered. “I promised you it’d be different.” 

“Yeah, well… feels like things’ll never be different for me.” 

You snapped your head up. “What’s that mean?” 

“Nothin’.” He sighed, kissing your temple, and yet still, he wouldn’t meet your eye. “How about you get some rest? I’ll keep the little missus company.” 

“Joel.” You cupped his jaw, pleading now. Everything felt so wrong. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. Even though the proof was right in front of you, it was hard to believe your baby was happy and healthy after all the trauma you’d faced. “We’re not gonna start her life this way. Tell me what you mean.”

He placed the baby down in the crib beside your bed before pinching the bridge of his nose. “I keep having to plan a life where I’m alone again, and honestly, I don’t know how I’d do it if I had to. Not this time.”

“But you’re not alone. I’m right here.”

“But you weren’t. For a minute there, I thought…” His voice grew thick, and he shook his head. “Sarah’s gone. Ellie hates me. Why the hell did I think it’d be third time lucky? She’s not even a day old, and she almost lost her mom! And there was nothing I could do. There’s never anything I can do.”

Your heart ached for him. One day, you prayed he wouldn’t hold the responsibility of every single person he loved on his shoulders. Maybe he was right. Maybe you’d been foolish to go into this thinking it could be better. The world would never be safe, not even here in Jackson, and the pain he must live with every day sure as hell wouldn’t ease now he had another daughter to raise. 

You felt hollow at the thought that maybe he’d leave. You wouldn’t blame him, not really. You were scared, too. But you’d only found the strength to do this because you were together, and you’d survived the odds so far. If that stopped feeling true… what then?

Devastation must have been written all over your face, because he pursed his lips. “Don’t listen to me, baby. I shouldn’t be sayin’ all this. You’re barely out of the woods.” 

“I don’t think we can keep doing this if you don’t let some of that guilt and blame go, Joel,” you admitted. “I think your daughter is gonna need a man who doesn’t hate himself for every single thing that’s wrong in the world. You’re right. There was nothing you could have done to stop this from happening. It was my body, and things like this happened even before the outbreak. I can’t imagine how scared you were, love, but fuck, you can’t keep making it your fault. It isn’t. It never was, especially not with Sarah. And this baby? She isn't Sarah." 

He winced at her name, as he often still did. Collapsing back in his chair, he took your hand. Slowly, his lower lip began to wobble as he finally met your gaze. “I love you too much to lose you. And her… How the hell am I gonna do this?” 

“I can’t answer that,” you said. “We knew it wouldn’t be easy.”

He snorted. “Ain’t that the truth.” Then, he bowed his head to press a kiss to the back of your hand. “Gonna try to be better. I promise. I'll hold it together."

“You don’t need to be better, and you don't need to hold it together. You’re already a good man, and talking about all this is important - for both of us. And for her.” You squeezed his fingers tightly. “I love you so much.” You teared up as you looked at the baby dozing in her crib. “And god, I love her. Can you believe we made her?” 

He hummed. “What the hell are we gonna call her?” 

“And where the hell are we gonna put her?” you added, worrying at your lip. “We never even found a crib.”

He shrugged, teasing. “I’m sure we’ll find a corner somewhere.” He leaned forward, tracing circles along your arm. “We’ll make do. Between the four of us, we’ll find a way. I’ll cut the damn trees down and build us a place from scratch myself if I have to.”

You smiled, peace finally flooding your exhausted body. You saw Ellie standing in the doorway, leaning against the frame with her arms crossed, and knew Joel was right. Your family was complete now. It would be a little broken at times, as all things were, but you’d do everything in your power to keep it whole. 

Even if it meant reminding Joel every damn day that he had to be gentle with himself.

[pubbamoon]

Venus signs and your music taste

Hey! Hope you're doing well. This is going to be the first (and maybe last, haha) post about astrology, 'cause I've been into that thing for five years, I guess. Since I'm interested in music, my first astrology observation will be about how someone's Venus sign can affect someone's music taste. It's also a Friday, a Venus-ruled day. So, let's go!? This is based on the tropical/western astrology. Take it as it resonates and leave what doesn't.

Venus in Aries: Oh well, that's the wild one! People with this Venus may love listening to kind of music which makes them confident, or you should use the music this way. Aries naturally rules over the 1st house of self and personality, so you guys with Aries Venus might listen to the song/music which resonates to your character or describes your life path. On the other hand, you may love energetic and bold type of music that can move you, something like EDM or Dance music!? Venus is in detriment in Aries, which is not a good sign in default. That means you might love type of music that is not well perceived by the music critics. You may also love rap/hip-hop music as well.

Venus in Taurus: Venus is in domicile in Taurus, which means that Venus is in own sing since it naturally rules over Taurus sign (and the 2nd house as well). This is a great sign for Venus to be in, music literally runs in your blood (take it as it resonates). You may love the type of music that grounds you and makes you peaceful. You can also prefer quality over quantity and listen to the songs that has some value or quality. Overall, you might love listening to music that is perceived as normal, stable or even predictable. Taurus is an earth sign, after all. Venus in Gemini: This sign rules the 3rd house of communication, words and self-expression, so you might prefer the lyrics when it comes to music. It doesn't have to be the case with all of you with Gemini Venus, but it can be (lol, what was that?). You may love to listen to the music that is relatable to you and your life circumstances. Your favorite artists could be singer-songwriters, who put their own lyrics first and who express themself freely. You can also listen to the different kind of music, since Gemini is the mutable sign, represented by the twins, which makes Gemini a dual sign. Your music taste is really versatile with this placement.

Venus in Cancer: You may love emotional type of music that gives you some kind of comfort. Cancer rules the 4th house of comfort and emotions, which makes sense. Moon is the natural ruler of Cancer and is associated with the homeland, which means that when it comes to music, you might listen to traditional or even patriarchal type of music that is related to you birth land/country or you love listening to the songs where your homeland is celebrated. Your favorite music genre could be folk, country or any other music genre that relates to your culture. Finally, you may love music that sounds familiar or nostalgic and this could mean listening to the retro music from the older times.

Venus in Leo: Similar with the Aries Venus, you may love listening to the music that boosts your confidence. Since Leo rules over the 5th house of creativity and hobbies, you don't like to be told what to listen to and don't rely on trends. You might also like romantic type of music, 'cause 5th house is associated with romance and short-term relationships. Your music playlist could be filled with a lot of shiny and bright songs that give you joy.

Venus in Virgo: I can sense that you are so picky while choosing the songs for playlists or while listening to the music in general. You may seek for perfection in every part of the song, the perfect lyrics, perfect instrumentals, perfect production etc. I feel like you always read the reviews written by music critics before choosing to listening anything, 'cause you're all so skeptical and suspicious. Venus is debilitated/in fall in Virgo, which means that Virgo is the worst sign possible for Venus. This basically correlates everything that I said about this placement.

Venus in Libra: Another domiciled position for Venus, which is great. Libra is a people-oriented sign and it rules over the 7th house of partnerships, marriage and long-term relationships, so you may love listening to songs with this type of themes. You might also like love songs or collaborations. It can be hard sometimes to choose what's your favorite artist, 'cause it seems to me that you may like both or every artist the same way, which makes sense since Libra is all about balancing things in our life.

Venus in Scorpio: First of all, it feels that you're pretty passionate about music. Second of all, you may like intense, dark type of music and your favorite artist is likely who can express raw emotions. You possibly hide your music playlist on Spotify (or on any other platforms) because of shame or you just don't want people to see you music taste. The themes of songs you may like to hear in songs are mostly breakups, criminal, transformations etc. You may listen to music to heal your wounds too. You may also feel like you rise like a Phoenix when you listen to the music.

Venus in Sagittarius: This placement tells me that you may possibly like optimistic type of music which is made for parties. The songs you listen to might be translucent or airy which make you want to dance or jump. The songs you like could also have deep meaning, since Sagittarius and 9th house are associated with philosophies, knowledge and wisdom. You may like music with a good atmosphere or which can make you feel good. This is such a funny and adventurous placement, love that.

Venus in Capricorn: It seems to me that you might have a serious approach when it comes to music. You may like quality, elegant, or even classical music (this won't apply for everyone). You don't mind when a particular song lasts more than five minutes, you even like to listen to long songs, 'cause Saturn represents longevity. By saying that, you like to listen to the music that ages like fine wine. Maybe you like to read reviews before listening to song or album. I have this placement in my tropical natal chart and I check the reviews out before listening to the whole body of work, haha lol.

Venus in Aquarius: Hmm, I think there's two sides of this placement. The first ones with this placement love to listen to experimental and eccentric type of music. When it comes to music, they like to stand out from the crowd and listen to something what is considered weird by societal norms. Aquarius sign always reminds me of the hippie culture from the 1960s. The second ones having this placements are one of the basic people out there, they listen to something that everyone listens to and they don't mind following the trends. Mind you that Aquarius rules the 11th house of the collective, masses of people, so it's not unusual for Aquarius Venus people to listen to something that is mainstream.

Venus in Pisces: Venus is exalted in Pisces, which means that Venus functions well here. Pisces rules over the 12th house of foreign culture, something hidden, and it's also associated with oceans. This tells me that you may like more listening to the music that comes from the different land or culture than yours. You can use music to heal yourself or to process your deep emotions. Similar with Scorpio Venus, you may also hide your music playlist from everyone else, 'cause you value privacy when it comes to the thing you love. This placement can indicate great taste of music or listening to the bunch of artists who aren't mainstream or who express their emotions.

That is everything I have to write. Hope you like this observation of mine. Make sure to care about yourself and do something you love to do. It's Friday, the Venus-ruled day after all.

Best regards,

Paky McGee

[animesmolbean]

Words Hold Power

An “The Umbrella Academy” fanfiction

Five x Reader

(Female)

Author's Note: Welcome to my The Umbrella Academy fanfiction! I'm so excited to share this story with you all! TUA is my favorite Netflix show! I'm very sad to see it's in its final season, but all great shows come to an end! But at least we'll get to rewatch it over and over again, lol.

Speaking of which, please, no spoilers for S4 since I have not watched it yet. I'll let you guys know where I am in S4 in coming posts.

With that said, I just wanted to tell you guys this. There was one hesitation I had with writing this story. Handling Viktor's character. I know about the journey of this character and Elliot Page's journey as well. I know about the transition, and I wanted to tell you how I planned on approaching this.

I did research on this topic and wanted to be sure I was handling it correctly. I researched how I should write transgender characters and their journeys throughout the story.

I also read other TUA fanfictions for research to see how other authors handle it, and like the research, it's a mixed bag. Some use Viktor only, and some show the name change.

After researching, I decided on an approach.

I will follow what the show does and show the transition story Viktor has. I chose this because I believe it's a beautiful journey, and the show does a great job handling the topic.

One last thing, all the main characters (The Hargreeves siblings) are aged up a little.

With all that said, I hope you enjoy the first chapter! ♥️

~Character Info~

Reader's ability is cursed speech. She can make anyone do what she says with only a few words. It's similar to Allison's, except she doesn't need to say certain words first like her, and her ability is much more powerful. To the point where she has to be extremely careful about what she says.

(As you can tell, this was inspired by the anime character, Toge Inumaki from Jujutsu Kaisen.)

Chapter 1: We Only See Each Other at Weddings and Funerals (Family Reunion)

On the twelfth hour of the first day of October 1985, forty-three women around the world gave birth.

This was unusual only in the fact that none of these women have been pregnant when the day first began.

Sir Reginald Hargreeves, eccentric billionaire and adventurer, resolved to locate and adopt as many of the children as possible.

He got eight of them.

Many years later, the kids grew up and went on with their lives as adults.

There was Number One, aka Luther Hargreeves. Big, strong and was currently on the moon, studying and preparing for whatever his mission was.

There was Number Two, aka Diego Hargreeves. Impulsive, brave and works as a vigilante of sorts.

There was Number Three, aka Allison Hargreeves. Famous actress who was currently on the red carpet in front of paparazzi.

There was Number Four, aka Klaus. A lazy, free-spirited soul who is currently leaving rehab and using the money he got from the rehab to buy drugs. He ended up in the back of an ambulance.

And, there was Number Seven, aka Vanya Hargreeves. She was quiet, timid, and was currently leaving the theater after practicing her violin.

However, their lives would change forever with one broadcast.

Their father was now dead.

THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY

☂

Vanya rode a taxi to her childhood home. A place she lived for many years.

The Umbrella Academy.

A tall condo-like building with a black gate.

Vanya approached the building and opened the doors, whose windows were decorated by umbrellas.

The foyer was fancy still. The middle was open with a chandelier hanging above a small round table in the middle. Tall, smooth white beams holding the sides which held the second floor. A staircase that leads to that second floor was behind the small round table.

It was just as Vayna remembered it. Every little detail was still there.

“Hey, Mom.”

Vanya called to the woman in the living room. Said woman sat on the sofa in front of the fireplace, which currently had a fire going. She stayed still as she stared into the dancing flames.

“Mom?”

“Vanya?”

A familiar voice turned Vanya’s attention elsewhere.

“You're actually here.”

She turned and saw her sister, Allison coming down the stairs.

“Hey, Allison.”

“Hey sis.”

Allison now stood before her sister. She chuckled and brought the other girl into a hug, which Vanya quietly but graciously returned.

“Ah. What is she doing here?”

A new voice spoke through the quiet foyer.

“You don't belong here. Not after what you did.”

It was Diego.

“You're seriously gonna do this today?” Allison spoke up, her tone telling that she wasn't in the mood for the male's attitude.

“Way to dress for the occasion, by the way.” She added, mocking Diego’s attire as he ascended the stairs. He was still in his “hero” gear; knives and everything.

“At least I'm wearing black.” Diego shot back nonchalantly as he turned left on the stairs, disappearing from the girls’ views.

Vanya, now uncomfortable, spoke up quietly, “You know what? I- Maybe he's right. And I shouldn't-”

“Forget about him.” Allison interrupted her. “I'm glad you're here.” She spoke softly. Vanya’s lips quirked up a little at Allison's words. The sisters shared a moment of silence.

☂

Diego arrived at his late father's room, to see Luther there checking the windows. He leaned against the doorframe.

“I can save you some time. They're all locked. No forced entry, no sign of struggle. Nothing out of the ordinary.”

As he spoke, he walked over to Luther who was also walking towards him.

“Oh, you got big, Luther. What's the secret, huh? Protein shakes? Low carbs?” Diego asked mockingly.

“What do you want?” Luther asked, not wanting to deal with Diego's attitude.

Diego reached into his pocket and pulled out a few folded pieces of paper, handing them to Luther. “The autopsy report.”

After he teasingly tried to pull them away from Luther, the latter brother snatched them out of his hand.

“And you have this, why?” Luther asked.

“Well, that's because I… broke into the coroner's office.” Diego explained as he sat down in an armchair. “And surprise, surprise, Dad's death was… normal. Just a boring, old heart failure.”

“Yeah, so?” Luther looked at Diego.

“So, why are you in here, checking all the windows?”

“Were you the first one on the scene?” Luther asked.

“Pogo found him.” Diego answered.

“Yeah, I talked with Pogo. He said he couldn't find Dad's monocle.”

“And your point being?” Diego asked in a bored tone.

“Can you think of a single time you saw Dad and he wasn't wearing that monocle? No. Which means someone took it. Which means there's a chance he wasn't alone when he died.”

Diego sat up from the armchair. “There is no mystery here. Nothing to avenge. Nothing to solve, nothing like that. It's just a sad old man who kicked it in a big empty house. Just like he deserved.”

“You should leave.” Lither spoke, not liking Diego's tone with that last sentence he spoke.

“Whatever you say, brother.” Diego said in a mocking tone as he turned to leave. Before he did, he turned back to Luther. “By the way, did you visit (Your Name) yet?”

Luther shook his head. “No. I was about to, actually.”

“You know where she is.” Diego simply said.

☂

Vanya entered the living room, looking around at the interior. She spotted a comic and new articles on their group, The Umbrella Academy. She looked at the bookshelves and pulled out one book in particular.

The title read, “Extra Ordinary My Life as Number Seven”

It was her autobiography book. The one she wrote when she left the academy.

She observed it solemnly until a voice spoke out.

“Welcome home, Ms. Vanya.”

She turned and saw Pogo, a human sized monkey dressed formally with a cane and glasses.

Vanya walked over to him and hugged him. Pogo hugged back with a hum. “So good to see you.” He noticed the book in her hand. “Ah, yes, your autobiography.”

“Do you know, um…” Vanya paused before continuing. “Did he ever read it?”

Pogo thought for a moment before replying, “Not that I'm aware of.”

Vanya turned her attention to the portrait above the fireplace. It showed a boy, around seventeen in age, sitting with a neutral but sophisticated look on his face.

“How long has it been since Five disappeared?” She asked.

Pogo turned to look at the portrait too. “It's been sixteen years, four months, and fourteen days.” The two looked at each other. “Your father insisted I keep track.”

“And… how long has (Your Name) been in that coma?”

“Sixteen years, four months, and six days.” Pogo replied.

“You wanna know something stupid? I always used to leave the lights on for him. I was scared that he would come back, it would be late, and the house would be dark and he wouldn't be able to find us, so he'd leave again. And he would take (Your Name) with him. So, every night I'd make a little snack and make sure all the lights were on.”

Pogo nodded. “Oh, I remember your snacks. I'm pretty sure I stepped in half those peanut butter and marshmallow sandwiches, and those (Favorite type of Cookie) cookies.” He sighed a couple times before he spoke again, “Your father always believed that Number Five was still out there somewhere. He also believed that one day (Your Name) would wake up. He never lost hope.”

“And look where that got him.” Vanya said solemnly.

☂

Allison went up to her late father's study, looking around the area. The familiarity of it brought up a memory.

〰️

Reginald Hargreeves was working in his office, as usual, when Grace knocked on the door. She entered before closing the door.

“The children are ready for bed, sir. They wanted to say goodnight.”

She turned and walked a couple of paces and opened the sliding door.

On the other side revealed the eight children, all wearing matching pajamas. Allison was in the center while the others surrounded her. Little (Your Name) stood between her and Five, a black cloth face mask covering her mouth and nose.

The children were all smiling as they waited for their father to acknowledge them. But he was so into his work that he didn't even glance up at them.

Sensing the awkwardness, Grace quickly dismissed the kids. The kids, of course, were disappointed but not surprised. As they left slowly, (Your Name) tugged on Allison's sleeve, silently asking her to come.

“I'll be there in a minute (Your Name).” The girl whispered. (Your Name) tilted her head to the side. Allison spoke again, “Why don't you go hang out with Five for a bit before bed? I know you planned on it.” She gave the masked girl a small smile. (Your Name) felt her cheeks warm up, but she nodded, leaving and quietly walking over to Five. The boy saw her coming and, with a nod of his head, gestured to her to follow him. (Your Name) nodded and started to walk beside him. As she did, she heard Allison,

“He's always busy.”

〰️

“Where's the cash, Dad?”

The sound of a voice diverted Allison's attention and she walked over to her father's desk, hearing clamoring noises. She leaned forward to look to see who was over there.

“Klaus? What are you doing in here?” She asked.

Said boy looked up and gasped at the sight of his sister. “Oh! Allison! Wow, is that you?” He asked as he stood up. He embraced her slowly; Allison slowly returned the hug. “Long time. Too long.” He pulled away. “Hey, I was hoping to see you, actually, because I wanted to get your autograph. Add it to my collection!” He planted his chin onto his hands.

Allison let her brother act because it was how he always behaved when she noticed the white paper bracelet on his left wrist. “Just out of rehab?” She asked.

“No, no. No, no, no, no. No. I'm done with all of that.” Klaus replied with a sigh as he removed the bracelet. “I just came down here to prove to myself that the old man was really gone.” He smiled. “And he is! He's dead. Yeah!” He clapped, making Allison smile a little, shaking her head a bit.

“You know how I know? Because if he were alive, not one of us would be allowed to set foot in this room.” Allison silently agreed with Klaus.

“He was always in here, our whole childhood, plotting his next torment, right?” He said with a chuckle as he sat in the armchair behind the desk, putting his feet on the desk. “Remember how he used to look at us? That scowl?” He pointed to the man's portrait onto the wall behind him. “Thank Christ, he's not our real father, so we couldn't inherit those cold, dead eyes!” He stretched his eyelids to show more of his eyeballs. He fake screams, making Allison chuckle a little as Klaus started to dramatically imitate their late father.

“Get out of his chair.”

Klaus turned his head and saw Luther standing by the doorway. “Oh, wow, Luther! Wow, you really, uh… You really filled out over the years, huh?” Klaus said as he stood and flexed his arm muscles.

“Klaus.” Luther warned.

“Save the lecture. I was already leaving. You guys can talk amongst yourselves. I am going to visit (Your Name). Oh! The precious little sister of ours.” He chuckled softly. Before he could leave though, Luther stopped him. “Drop it.”

“Ex-squeeze me?” Klaus said.

“Do it. Now.” Luther ordered.

Klaus pulled his arm away from Luther and went back to the desk and started to empty out his pockets, which held a few of his late father's belongings. “It's just an advance on our inheritance! That's all it is!” Allison chuckled silently at her brother. “No need to get your little panties in a bunch.” With that, Klaus left, closing the door; leaving Luther and Allison alone in the room.

“So, Klaus is still Klaus, in case you are wondering.” Luther started.

“You know, after all these years, I find it strangely comforting.” Allison stated.

“Did you see Diego?” Luther asked.

“With his stupid outfit?” Allison added in amusement.

“Oh, I know. Do you think he wears that thing in the bathroom?” Lauther asked.

“Like in the shower?” Allison asked for confirmation.

“Yeah.” Luther confirmed.

“Yes, absolutely!” Allison laughed.

The two went on to talk about how their lives are going now that they are adults. Luther was the only one to stay while the rest went their separate ways. Their conversation ended talking about Allison's family and her powers.

〰️

A little later, everyone congregated in the living room. The fire was still going in the fireplace as everyone sat in silence.

Luther started talking about doing a memorial service for their late father. Some like Allison were mostly confused by this or making fun of it like Klaus.

“Is that my skirt?” Allison asked, noticing Klaus wearing a skirt now.

“Oh, yeah this. I found it in your room. It's a little dated, I know, but it's very breathy on the bits.”

Luther stopped Klaus before he could go further and started to talk about their father's death. He had a theory that he didn't die simply of heart failure. He recounted how he was acting suspicious and requested Klaus to try to communicate with him. Klaus was not interested.

“I can't just call Dad into the afterlife and be like, “Dad, could you just stop playing tennis with Hitler for a moment and take a quick call?”

“Since when? That's your thing.” Luther said.

“I'm not in the right… frame of mind.”

“You're high?” Allison asked, not surprised.

“Yeah! Yeah!” Klaus laughed. “I mean, how are you not listening to this nonsense?”

“Well, sober up, this is important.” Luther said.

Klaus only sighed.

When Luther started talking about the missing monocle, Diego concluded that Luther was suspicious of all of them, saying that Luther thought one of them killed their dad. This caused everyone to get upset. Diego insulted Luther's leadership, Klaus got up and jokingly said that he might as well go murder their Mom and (Your Name), unless she was already dead. Vanya left in silence and. Allison left in silence as well. Luther tried to defend himself, but it was too late.

They weren't always like this. When they were kids, they were tight knit.

〰️

17 YEARS AGO

“This is Jim Hellerman, reporting live for Channel 2 News outside of the Capital West Bank at Main and Sixth. A group of heavily armed men stormed the bank not three hours ago and took an unknown number of hostages.”

The armed men surveyed the bank as they pointed their guns at the bound up hostages and pushed them behind the counter as they proceeded with the robbery.

Unexpectedly, a girl with curly black hair, in a school uniform and mask, walked casually to one of the robbers.

It was Allison.

“Hey, get back with the others.” The robber ordered the girl.

“I heard a rumor.” Allison spoke.

“What? What did you say?”

Allison leaned forward and used her ability, “I heard a rumor that you shot your friend in the foot.”

The robber pointed his gun at one of his partners and promptly shot him in the foot, knocking him down. The hostages screamed at the sound of the gun.

Suddenly, someone, dressed in a boy's school uniform with a mask came crashing down from a window above and landed behind the counter. It was Luther. He punched one robber and threw him out the window with surprising strength.

Then, another kid dressed like Luther came from the other side of the bank. “Guns are for sissies. Real men throw knives.” He threw two long knives at one of the robbers only for them to redirect to another robber and immediately killed him.

There were now only two robbers left in the lobby.

One of them climbed onto the desk and pointed his gun shakily at the three kids. “Get back, you freaks.”

“Hey, be careful up there, buddy.” Diego, the knife throwing kid taunted.

“Get back now!”

“Wouldn't want you to get hurt.” Allison taunted as well.

“Or what?”

A fourth kid appeared seemingly out of nowhere, sitting criss cross on the desk. A taunting smirk on his face. This was Number Five.

The robber shot at Five, but he disappeared and reappeared on the other side. When the robber turned around and tried to shoot him again, he suddenly realized that he was not holding a gun.

“Ooh! That's one badass stapler!” Five taunted before smacking the guy's hand holding the stapler into his head. This knocked the robber over.

All they had to do now was get rid of the robbers in the vault.

Or so they thought.

There was one more.

He loaded his fun and his gun cocked, catching the kids off guard.

“Down you freaks!” He yelled.

Suddenly, running from a hidden place behind a wall was a fifth kid, dressed like Allison, as she pulled down her face mask. She directed her attention to the robber.

“Explode!”

The single word echoed loudly through the bank, and just before the guy could turn his gun to the girl, his body suddenly exploded, body parts, guts, and blood spreading out everywhere. The hostages screamed in fear. The girl quickly covered her face again, breathing heavily as she ran to her siblings.

She gestured to all of them. They couldn't see much of her face, but they could tell she was worried by the look in her eyes.

“We're okay. Thanks (Your Name).” Allison said.

(Your Name) hummed, nodding as she walked over to behind the desk with the others, while two more kids dressed like the rest of the boys joined them. Five looked at her. “That was pretty badass. Good work.” He complimented, giving her a smile. (Your Name) felt her cheeks warm up a little, and she tilted her head a bit and closed her eyes. Most people wouldn't be able to tell her expression behind the mask, but Five knew she was smiling at him in thanks.

“Do we really have to do this?” A meek voice asked.

“Come on, Ben. There's more guys in the vault.” Luther told the boy.

Ben sighed as he walked to the vault door. “I didn't sign up for this.”

He entered as the hostages all ran for their lives out of the bank. Inside the vault, the last of the robbers were eyeing slaughtered by Ben's ability. He screeched and roared as his tentacles ripped them apart and threw them against the walls. Blood splattered all over the windows.

Once it was quiet, Ben came out, covered in blood. “Can we go home now?” He asked, his breathing shaky.

It was time to leave.

The seven kids started walking towards the entrance of the bank. (Your Name) pulled out a small vial and turned the cap. She pulled the bottom part of her mask up and put the bottle to her lips. She tilted her head back and started swallowing the liquid. She finished it and placed the empty bottle back in her pocket.

“Are you feeling okay?”

Five's voice made (Your Name) turn to him. She nodded and hummed in thanks. Five offered his arm to her. “Ready?” He asked. The girl nodded again, and she hooked her arm with Five's. Five smiled at her, and they started walking after their siblings.

The seven kids emerged from the back as the news reporters pointed their cameras at the group, and they all clamored to try to talk to them.

Above on the top of a building nearby, stood Reginald Hargreeves, observing the other kids with a mini telescope. An eighth kid, dressed like Allison and (Your Name), minus the mask, stood next to him.

“Why can't I go play with the others?” The girl asked.

“We've been through this before, Number Seven. I'm afraid there's just nothing special about you.” Reginald said as he lowered his telescope.

The girl looked down. “Oh.”

Eventually, Reginald came down to stand with the children.

“Our world is changing. Has changed. There are some among us gifted with abilities far beyond the ordinary. I have adopted seven such children.”

‘You mean eight.’ (Your Name) thought to herself as she looked down temporarily, her arm still linked with Five's.

“I give you the inaugural class of the Umbrella Academy.”

Many news reporters asked many questions.

“What happened to their parents?” One asked.

“They were suitably compensated.” Reginald replied.

“Are you concerned about the welfare of the children?” Another asked.

“Of course. As I am for the fate of the world.” Reginald said.

〰️

☂

Everyone was in separate rooms, having their alone time after the little dispute from earlier. Klaus was still in the living room, trying to talk to their late father but he ended up knocking the vase filled with his ashes over.

Luther was walking through the hallways, reminiscing until he got to his room.

Allison was looking through her belongings until she found a gold heart locket with ‘A+L’ carved onto the front.

Klaus took the vase into the kitchen where he proceeded to take more pills.

Diego laid on the couch in the living room, playing with one of his knives.

Vanya sat on the stairs, a solemn look on her face.

Luther eventually found a familiar record and played it on the record player.

“I Think We're Alone Now” by Tiffany started to play.

Everyone heard the familiar tune all throughout the house and they all started to dance in their respective rooms.

Childhood nostalgia ran through their bodies as they all danced like no one was watching. Even Pogo moved a little to the beat.

But suddenly, thunder rumbled and lightning flashed.

The music stopped as the house reacted to the violent disturbance.

The siblings all ran to the courtyard and saw a giant hole, surrounded by blue lightning.

“What is it?” Vanya asked.

“Don't get too close!” Allison warned.

“Yeah, no shit.” Diego said.

“Looks like some sort of temporal anomaly. Either that or a miniature black hole. One of the two.

“Pretty big difference there, Paul Bunyan.” Diego insulted.

“Out of the way!” Klaus exclaimed as he came out with a fire extinguisher and tried to spray it but it was out of steam. So, he just threw it at the mysterious anomaly only for it to get sucked in.

“What is that gonna do?” Allison asked.

“I don't know. Do you have a better idea?” Klaus asked.

The anomaly got stronger and Luther ushered everyone behind him to protect them. Klaus wanted to run. Luther and Allison held hands.

The electrical crackling intensified and someone emerged from the anomaly, arms out. It disappeared and the person fell out of the sky and landed on the ground. The sky cleared up as the siblings walked towards the person, who stood up. He was dressed in a suit way too big for him.

“Does anyone else see little Number Five, or is that just me?” Klaus asked.

The boy known as Five looked at himself then back at the siblings.

“Shit.”

☂

The six were now in the kitchen. Five was busy making a sandwich while the others watched in shock.

“What's the date? The exact date.” Five asked.

“The 24th.” Vanya replied.

“Of what?”

“March.”

“Good.”

Luther spoke up. “So, are we gonna talk about what just happened?”

Five didn't reply. He just continued with making his sandwich.

Silence fell for a couple of seconds until Luther stood up. “It's been seventeen years.”

Five scoffed. “It's been a lot longer than that.” He blinked over to the cabinet.

“I haven't missed that.” Luther muttered.

“Where'd you go?” Diego asked.

“The future. It's shit, by the way.” Five replied as he blinked back to the table.

“Called it.” Klaus said.

“I should've listened to the old man. You know, jumping through space is one thing, jumping through time is a toss of the dice.” Five looked up at the siblings. “Nice dress.” He told Klaus.

“Oh, well, danke!” Klaus said, playing with the article of clothing.

“Wait, how did you get back?” Vanya asked.

“In the end I had to project my consciousness forward into a suspended quantum state version of myself that exists across every possible instance of time.” Five explained.

“That makes no sense.” Diego spoke up.

“Well, it would if you were smarter.” Five sasses.

Diego stood up to confront the boy but Luther stopped him, holding him back.

“How long were you there?” He asked.

“Forty-one years. Give or take.”

Luther and Diego sat back down. “So what are you saying? That you're fifty-eight?” The former asked.

Five looked at Luther. “No, my consciousness is fifty-eight.” He finished his sandwich. “Apparently, my body is now seventeen again.”

“Wait, how does that even work?” Vanya asked.

“Delores kept saying the equations were off. Eh.” Five took a bite out of his sandwich. “Bet she's laughing now.”

Vanya was confused. “Delores?”

Five ignored her and looked at the newspaper that told him about Reginald Hargreeves’ death. “Guess I missed the funeral.”

“How'd you know about that?” Luther asked.

“What part of the future do you not understand?” Five asked. “Heart failure, huh?”

“Yeah.” “No.” Diego and Luther said together.

Five hummed before clicking his tongue. “Nice to see nothing's changed.” Then, he got a good look at his siblings again. He realized that one was missing. “By the way, where's (Your Name)?”

The other five siblings looked at each other, solemn expressions on their faces now. “Well…” Vanya started. “There isn't an easy way to say this.” Allison said. “She's in a coma.” “She's dead.” Klaus and Diego finished. “Diego!” Allison scolded.

Five looked at his siblings, a subtle look of worry on his face, but on the inside, his heart was beating faster. “What happened?”

“Well…. like I said… this isn't easy to say.” As Allison tried to explain, they suddenly heard soft footsteps approaching the kitchen. They slowly turned their heads and what they saw shook them to the core.

There stood…

(Your Name).

Klaus yelled in surprise.

“Holy shit.” Diego said.

Everyone else looked in surprise.

(Your Name) was alive.

[charmedreincarnation]

TW: SA, possibly death??

Hey there fellow witches and warlocks, it's spooky season and I am loving it! I recently discovered the void state through yoga nidra and your reverse psychology method charm, and I was ready to manifest my dream life. October is my birth month and my favorite season, so I was excited to see what the universe had in store for me and whoa did it come through.

It's unfortunate to see that SA victims like me and others are still getting death and rape threats. I was inspired by a blog who shared her experience with yoga nidra, but then deactivated due to trolls sending her horrible messages. It's sad to see people hating on others' success, but we won't let them bring us down.

I manifested everything I desired of course my mind came through!! - from my desired face, body, aura, zodiac, personality, voice, talents, friends, family, and so much more. A few things I've manifested include a dark academia mansion, billionaire parents who aren't known, a witchy and Halloween-themed small business, and an eco-friendly private jet.

I know some of you may be concerned about the "death note" I've manifested, but it's just for fun - I'm a huge fan of Light Yagami from Death Note. I won't actually use it, but it's a cool spook factor to have.

Here’s a tiny list anyways ⬇️

🎃Desired face, body, aura zodiac, personality, voice, talents, friends, family and so much more. I had this long wattpadd story ass list that I obviously won’t share here but trust me my mind came through .

🎃open minded witchy family, dark academia ass mansion, Pinterest dark academia wardrobe in my massive closet that’s the size of a room, billionaire parents who aren’t known (I love my privacy and I love being mysterious), wattpadd billionaire love story to happen in the future. Yes not now…. I’ve been ugly all my life so I want to be a slut right for a bit not sorry, everyone loves and falls in love with me, Idgaf personality, Scorpio sun moon and rising, bold attitude that is adored, but a kind heart for the people I love and so much more. Again like most people I had a very long list on my google documents

🎃I own a witchy candy and Halloween small business!!! but I’m going to be making 100 million dollars a year so I will be a billionaire in the future. I like working and having a craft and it’s just so me, ugh I love my life !!! But I’m going to hire my two best friends that I manifested so we can all be successful rich witch bitches who travel the world and have too much money to spend

🎃an environment friendly private jet. It won’t affect the environment as I love the environment but I also hate flying commercial! I’m also vegan now, I couldn’t be one before due to health issues, but I love animals 🥹🥹🥹 and now I’m rich enough to have healthy tasty cruelty free food.

🎃anyone who sends death threats, rape threats, or engages in a bitter manner on that tea page including the owner will never get into the void until they grow up and acknowledge that they’re weirdos. I’m not as forgiving as these other big blogs. Bye ✌️

🎃anytime I say “you’ll die alone” when im arguing with a man 🤮🤮 (incels, misgyonists, racists not men who aren’t insufferable ofc love y’all) they actually will, and no one will ever love them, until they grow up and once again acklowege their faults. As you can see I’m very into vigilante justice and I’m petty 👻 I’m a witch anyways so now my craft will be perfect.

🎃all my spells and curses work! And any harm attempted to be done to me always backfires On the person 10x worse ! Yea this is my world everyone’s just living in it.

🎃psychokenis, my eyes being able to turn red, divine protection for me and my loved ones, the ability to speak to animals, and never aging. The last thing I manifested a way to benefit all !!!! research age regression and see how we will all be eternal youthful witch bitches in the future ;) I got inspired by my grandma who retired but us too old to enjoy her life. Now she can and we call be 150 and still sexy with 0 bodily pain. I also always hated how we slowly decompose and lose bodily function until we die.. like why can’t we be sexy and bodily abled forever!! This will also help with health issues and diseases like cancer! Just one way to give back for my blessings. And the rest is just to spook bitches tbh I don’t plan on actually doing anything but speaking to animals.

🎃I manifested a death note. Now before y’all start I just really love light yagami I don’t think I will actually use it or maybe I will just to spook bitches but whatever

🎃so much more that I don’t want to share because it’s too long!

So, fellow hot bitches and witches , keep manifesting your dreams and never let anyone bring you down. Remember, we were born to be happy, rich, and loved. It is in your DNA and my word is final !!!!! I’m gonna leave my dream life and be a whore now lova yaaaa 🖤🖤🖤

Lmfao slay 😭😭 idk if it’s too early or what but this sending me for some reason! Anyways I wish you all the best in your life and dreams. Have a great spooky season! I love witches and Halloween too 🧞‍♀️🧞‍♀️

[gothgleek]

Could you write adrian chase x reader who is Emilia's sibbling and she is starting to realize that her sibbling has a massive crush on Vigilante and she does not approve that at all? Pleaseeee i love him 🥹🥹🥹 and maybe Vigilante really enjoy the reader's friendship, enough to put peacemaker as his 2nd best friend.

I hope you enjoy this short little blurb, especially since it's been a while since you requested it. Also since Tumblr keeps deleting this! But this is my first Adrian Chase x reader fic so I wanted it to be written well. At least, as well as I can write it.

Notes: GN reader with they/them pronouns. Reader’s race is up to interpretation as they are adopted and it’s mentioned once. Takes place post-series with no major spoilers. Likes, Comments, and Reblogs are appreciated!

Emilia was fuming when Chris arrived at the hospital and when he followed her gaze, he burst into laughter. You and Adrian were chatting away in the corner, the busboy animatedly waving his arms while you gave full bellied laughs in response. 

Emilia had been at the Evergreen hospital for a week now and as her next of kin, you were on the first flight to take care of her. She would never admit it aloud but Emilia did look forward to seeing you again. It had been a few years since she had last seen you. But despite that, the two of you always had a good relationship. She had hoped this would be time for the two of you to catch up.

Then you had to meet Adrian. 

The two of you had been working on a puzzle you bought at the local pharmacy and talking about the option of tracking down your birth parents when Adrian popped his head up behind a bush by Emilia’s window. 

“Hey Harcourt!” Adrian said with a bright smile and a blue bandaid on his forehead.

Somehow that smile of his charmed you enough for her to finish the puzzle by herself. And Emilia didn’t even like puzzles. What was she supposed to do with a puzzle of hot air balloons when she was done? 

“So like…” You bit your lips and batted your eyes while the two of you sat at the end of Emilia’s bed. “What other toys do you like playing with?” 

“Oh well,” Adrian turned the knife on its side so you could look at it. Your face immediately fills with excitement when he places it in your hands. Not for the first time, Emilia felt uncomfortable and annoyed she was in the middle of the two’s shy yet lovestruck gazes. Chris seemed to share the sentiment as he was mock gagging beside her. Though it could have been due to him stealing and eating her hospital food.

“This knife is great for throwing, the holes on the side reduces the wind resistance.” You told Adrian animatedly, talking with your hands. Emilia recalled your knife throwing lessons as a kid. 

Adrian lit up with joy just as Emilia groaned. “That’s why this is my favorite knife!” 

Emilia thought if your guys’ mother knew you were taking your knife throwing lessons as an opportunity to flirt- especially with a guy like Adrian- knew she would be rolling in her grave.

You stared into his eyes and began leaning forward. Emilia wished she had something to throw at you. Luckily, a nurse knocked on the door to let them know visiting hours were wrapping up.

You hugged your sister and, glancing down at the finished puzzle, promised to bring another one tomorrow. You promised you would help her finish it, to which Emilia gave you an unconvinced look. Then you offered to bring her some non-hospital food (specifically some waffles and burgers) and she pulled you in for another hug.

“You know,” Adrian says as the two of you walk out the door. “If you’re still in town this weekend, I can set up some appliances in the woods we can throw grenades at.” 

Emilia sat up at once. What?

“What do you mean by that?” She grabbed Chris’s shirt, ignoring the shooting pain in her leg. 

“What does he mean by that? Adrian?” She called out. “Get back here!”

[junniieesbby]

Shut Up and Continue What You Started|Choi Beomgyu

Pairing: Non Idol Beomgyu x F!reader

Genre: Friends to Enemies to Lovers, Smut, Angst, Kind of Fluff.

WC: 1.6k

Rating: 18+ MDNI

Summary: When your childhood friend turned enemy sees you dance and giggle with one his best friends. He loses it, can't stand the sight of you with someone other than him. He goes to show you just how much he missed you and how incredibly sorry he was for treating you badly.

Warning: Mentions of Alcohol, Smut, Creampie, Implied Cockwarming. Let me know if I missed anything.

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Nothing mentioned in this fiction represents any of the characters.

A/N: This is a very late post for my Secret Santa. @boba-beom surpriseeee it’s me Angel (although you already knew because I’m the last one to post haha). This was so fun to do part of me is nervous because I am writing this for one of my all time favorite writers here on tumblr and I wanted this to be really good! Everyone please check out all the other beauties Secret Santa posts @amoryeonjun aka @lovejoshua , @honajoong and @flwrseon 💗 give them lots of love 🥺

Angel I hope you like this👉🏻👈🏻

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

All you wanted to do was to wipe that stupid sexy smirk off his face. He was so annoyingly handsome but he got on your nerves any chance he had. Choi Beomgyu was handsome, irritating, and drove you mad.

You had known each other since the day he was born. Your moms were best friends and they had gotten pregnant at around the same time. Your mom gave birth a day before Beomgyu’s mom did, so you two were forced to be attached at the hip.

At one point he was your best friend. Someone you always went to for comfort. It all changed when you entered high school, it was like you didn’t even know him. He no longer talked to you, he stopped coming over to your house to hang out, and he even would glare at you for no apparent reason.

Here you were at your parents annual Christmas Eve party, with a glass of Prosecco in your hand staring at Beomgyu who’s all over his next girl toy. You hated to say it but it hurt, it hurt seeing someone you liked and missed be so close to another girl. This was the reason you decided to go to university in a city that was further from home. You couldn’t stand watching him mess around with yet another girl.

You wanted to forget about Beomgyu for tonight. If he liked to go and have fun with random girls and rub it in, so could you!

Walking to the dance floor you see your perfect target. Kang Taehyun, who happens to be one of Beomgyu’s Bestfriend. You walk up to his dancing form and slide your body to him. “Hey Tyun, long time no see” you say looking up at him. “Y/N!!! It’s been so long.” Taehyun said, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you in for an embrace.

“I know it feels like forever. Can I dance with you?” you tell him rather shyly. Taehyun was very handsome, kind and smart. Although you and Beomgyu had a falling out Taehyun would always check up on you to make sure you were good. “You don’t even need to ask, love” Taehyun said while placing firm hands on your waist dancing to the rhythm of the song.

You two continued to dance and chatted about how life has been when suddenly you felt a pair of arms rip you from Taehyun’s embrace. “You come with me” Beomgyu says sternly then turns and looks at a smirking Taehyun “and you, I’ll deal with you later” and without another word Beomgyu drags the two of you to your room.

Once inside he slams the door shut and locks it. “What the fuck was that for Beomgyu” you said folding your arms. “Why were you dancing with him like that?” Beomgyu looks at you clearly mad. You have never seen him this visibly angry before. “Like what? We were just dancing. And it’s none of your business who I dance with and how I dance with them.” You did not know what his problem was but he wasn’t going to talk to you like that after years of not talking.

He turns to walk towards you and you slowly walk backwards until your back hits the door. Beomgyu is standing mere inches from you as he leans down his nose brushing yours. “Smiles…” You froze at the nickname he just called you. The nickname he gave you when you were kids because he said you always smiled at him. “You do not get to come back into my life after years of not talking calling me nicknames like nothing happened between us, Beomgyu” The moment you finished your sentence he crashed his lips onto yours. Years of pent up frustration, hurt, and desire were poured into that kiss.

Beomgyu’s hands started to wonder cupping your ass and lifting you slowly pushing you into the door deepening the kiss. You had never been kissed like this before, this kiss was full of lust and passion. You slowly pull away from the kiss confused as to why he was doing this.

“Y/n…look I know I am a shitty friend for not talking to you all these years, But the reason for that was because I liked you. I liked you so much it started driving me crazy. I thought not seeing you would make things better, but clearly not. You have no idea how long I have wanted to slam my lips against yours.” Beomgyu said, as he slowly brought his hand to your cheek.

You stared at him, shocked at his words. Part of you wanted to scream and yell at him for not talking to you about his feelings, because he had no idea how you felt, and the other part wanted you to grab his collar and smash your lips to his. You didn’t feel like arguing and that kiss had you wanting more. The latter of the options won as you grabbed his collar bringing him closer to you whispering “Shut up and continue what you started”.

Beomgyu smirked at your words as he kissed you passionately bringing you to your bed. “Fuck angel you look so sexy in this tight red dress Been wanting nothing more than to fuck you in it” He slowly starts to leave kisses on your neck going to your breast. He pulled your dress down a little so your cleavage could fall out. “I wish I could take my time with these beauties, but that's for another day. The dress stays I want to fuck your pretty cunt while you wear it.” He said pulling your panties down and tossing them to the side. He unzipped his pants and let his cock out stroking it a few times before he let it slide through your drenched folds. Your whines and whimpers were music to his ears. “Beomgyu, hurry up and fuck me stop the teasing” That earned you a slap to your cunt.

“Be patient baby, i've been wanting your pussy for years let me enjoy it” He didn’t even let you respond, he slid his cock in with ease. “Fuck baby you’re so wet and tight I could spend the rest of my days in your cunt” His dirty words caused you to clinch which earned a grunt from him. “Beomgyu, so good…so so good” That is all you could say your brain too fuzzy to comprehend anything other than the delicious cock that is sliding in and out of you.

Beomgyu’s hand came up to twist and play with your nipples as you reached down to start rubbing your folds for a faster relief. He quickly slapped your hand away. “You will cum with my cock and my cock only” He started to move faster. You needed him closer to you, you grabbed his tie and pulled him smashing your lips on him. Beomgyu’s cock twitched; he thought that was the hottest thing he'd ever seen. Your kiss became sloppier as your orgasm was approaching.

“You close angel?” He asked you, but he knew he could feel you clench around him. All you could do was nod. His thrusts continued but they became messy. He reached between the both of you as he was getting there and pinched your clit which sent you over the edge. Your legs started to shake from the stimulation. After a few more thrusts Beomgyu came. He leaned down and gave your forehead a kiss whispering “You did so well for me Angel”.

As he was getting up you pulled him by the collar again. “Stay, just stay please I need you to be as close to me as possible” You didn’t want him to leave you anytime soon. “I was just going to clean you up baby, but I will stay. I will never ever make the same mistake of leaving you again” He flipped the two of you so he was laying on his back. One hand playing with your hair and the other rubbing your back. “Merry Christmas Beomie…I am still mad at you, but i'm glad to be in your arms” You nozzle your head in the crook of his neck. “Merry Christmas my Angel, I am sorry I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you. And you will only be in my arms from now on.” He grabbed your hand that was placed on his neck and gave it a kiss. You both slept soundly that day and woke up to a white Christmas.

[miyuhpapayuh]

butterflies.

After their close friends and family received the news about them being invited to the most anticipated event of the creative world, Mya, Isaiah and the rest of the group began planning for their awaited, highly anticipated trip.

The pair have also gotten closer over the last couple of weeks. Going out to dinner after work, drinks on the weekend, and her new favorite, sharing ice cream at Maggie's diner.

“Ooh!” 

Currently sifting through the dresses that her mama had sent her, she lands on a red hot number with a slit up the thigh.

“I don’t know what event mama thinks I’m goin’ to, but…” she trails off, laughing to herself.

Pulling it off the hanger, she lays it across her bed and begins to tug at the bottom of her shirt when her music abruptly cuts off, followed by the ringing of her phone.

Peering over at it on her dresser, she smiles. “Oh, boy.”

Answering the call, she watches his handsome face come into view. His wide smile showcases itself, almost mirroring hers.

“I’m starting to think you’re watching me,” she jokes, keeping the top of her head in view as she reaches for the dress.

“Why?” he asks.

“Because you always call me when I’m in the middle of something,” she laughs.

“What’s so important, this time?” he mocks as she laughs.

“My mom sent me a bunch of dresses to try on for this damn ball, and I’m about to lose my mind, because I can’t decide on one,”  she sighs.

“You need some help decidin’?” he asks, his chin in his palm as he stares at the partial view of her face and the ceiling.

“Uh…sure! Give me a second.” She moves away from the camera and begins to pull her shirt over her head, grabbing the dress and sliding into it.

“You cut my favorite song off this time. I just want you to know”, she grumbles, fidgeting with the dress.

“And what song was that?”

“I Think About Lovin’ You by Earth, Wind and Fire.”

“Hm. Don’t think I’ve ever heard it.”

“No worries. We’ll fix that,” she says, before picking her phone up from the dresser.

“Okay, you’ve fattened me up over the past couple of weeks, so don’t be too harsh.”

He chuckles. “I would never do such a thing.”

“Okay,” sitting it back down in an upright position, she pulls her hair away from her face and poses, “how do I look?”

“Wow,” his eyes wander over her curves, committing them to memory..

“You look so good.”

Her brows raise, the butterflies in her stomach doing somersaults.

“Really?”

“Absolutely,” he nods enthusiastically, making her cheese wide.

“Can I get a spin?” He asks, poking his lip out.

“I'll oblige you, this time.” She winks, taking her time twirling like a doll on display, giggling at his whistles.

“Damn girl,” he shakes his head.

“Alright, alright, let me go try on another one!” She says, moving out of frame to silently squeal and slip into another dress.

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After an hour and a half of making the object of her affection blush, Mya decides to have lunch with her mother at their favorite spot, Shoney’s.

As the chimes on the door ring, her mother looks up from her coffee and motions her over.

“Hey, baby.” She greets her daughter with a kiss on the cheek as she files into the booth seat, removing her jacket.

“Hey, ma. Man, it’s chilly out there today.”

“That’s why I texted you about a jacket even though you swear you don’t get cold.”

“Well, if I tell you that you’re right about me being cold, you’ll just gloat about it until you die so, no. I’m not cold.” She blinks.

“You are your father’s child.”

“That’s what the birth certificate says, yes.”

“Anyways, I brought you here to talk about all of your success, thus far. I’m very proud of you. How do you feel?”

A genuine smile spreads across her lips.

“Thank you! I’m so happy, honestly. I knew Savannah believed in me, but I won’t lie and say that I knew this was coming!”

“The Gold Ball is definitely a once in a lifetime experience, but you deserve it! You’ve been working hard for the past three years at Abstraction. It’s about time that your hard work paid off.” Her mother stresses.

“Yeah, I’ve heard that a couple of times. I believe it, I’m just still processing it all.”

“Well, good. Now, do I get to hear about this boy that’s got you all giggly, yet?”

 Mya sighs, knowing it was coming.

“All of a sudden, I’m hungry. I’ll be right back.” She gets up from the table and heads towards the buffet line to fill her empty stomach.

With her mother being the relentless soul that god put her on earth to be, she heads over and behind making her own plate, all the while poking for information.

“Oh, come on! I’ve been patient with you, Nicole.”

“Ma, not the middle name. Don’t be dramatic.”

“I’m not being dramatic. You’re holding out on me.”

“I just wanna eat, ma. Let me eat and then I’ll tell you. Okay?”

“Fine.”

Twenty minutes, an entire rundown and a full stomach later…

“He sounds like a good ol’ southern gentleman. Is he cute?”

“Ma,” Mya grabs her phone off the table and goes to his contact picture. “Cute isn’t an accurate description.”

Sharing the phone, her mother’s brows lift. “Oh, wow. He’s one beautiful man.”

“I know!” She agrees with her eyes closed, making her laugh.

“So, you really like this one?”

“I’m starting to, yeah! Besides him being pretty, he’s such a sweetheart and he’s a computer nerd like myself. What more could a girl ask for?”

“Babies.” She answers.

Mya almost chokes on air.

“Huh?!”

“What?? I’m not getting any younger.. neither are you.”

“I’m only twenty-seven. I’ve got time, and your first candidate for me shouldn’t be a man that I’ve only known for about a month! Relax a little, please.”

“Is he going to the seminar, as well?” She asks, completely ignoring her daughter.

“Yes.” She purses her lips together, not letting it slip that he was also invited to the Gold Ball, knowing her mother would just get amped up all over again.

“Well, you’ll have some eye candy while you listen to those white people tell you about success.” She snorts.

“And you said my father was harsh on white people,” Mya laughs. “I think you took it over, ma.”

“Your father is a fool.”

“That’s a conversation for another day.”

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“You guys!”

Taylor kisses Mercedes’ and Mya’s cheek before sitting in the available seat, slinging her jacket over the back of the chair.

“Usually, I’d say you’re being dramatic with the kisses and shit, but it has been a minute.” Mercedes comments, sipping on his long island iced tea.

“It really has! I missed y’all.” Mya chimes in.

“Mhm. You been all hugged up with strong arms. I might even be a little jealous.” Mercedes says, making Mya’s cheeks flush red.

“Jealous? I thought you and Mark were kickin’ it?”

Taylor snorts. “Mark was just that. He couldn’t even protect ya girl!”

“I missed something??” Mya asks, both of them nodding at her, quickly.

“Chy, how ‘bout we went to the movies, last weekend and this big mountain of a man gets in ol’ boy’s face, tryna check him on some I’m more of a man than you are type of shit and Mark just stood there. Now, you know me! I was like you ain’t gon check him?? He lookin’ at me like it was my fault, cause then they start goin’ at it and that big bitch started callin’ me out my name and the motherfucker still just stood there! Lookin’ like he was about to fuckin’ cry. So I left.”

Mya’s jaw was on the floor.

“You gotta be kidding me! Has he tried to contact you?”

“Several times!” Taylor laughs.

“It’s not funny, Tay! That shit was embarrassing.” Mercedes grumbles. “But, yeah, so I’m single again. Maybe, for a while longer cause that was just too much for me.”

“Man, I’m sorry I missed that. I’m sure you could’ve used an extra shoulder to lean on,” Mya frowns. “Maybe, an extra crowbar.” She cracks.

“Girl, you’re fine, I want you to enjoy all you can of ol’ thick neck. When do we officially get to meet him, by the way?”

“As soon as you can call him by his name.”

“We know his name, girl. Mister muscles!”

“You play too damn much, Cedes. But, uh… how about this weekend? We can all go out for drinks or something.” Mya suggests.

“Ooh! There’s a new spot, uptown!” Taylor snaps her fingers, trying to pull the name of the place out of thin air, “Flavor! It’s so cute. They got great food, an open bar,” she nudges Mercedes, “and a lil common area, if you wanna dance a little.”

“Sounds like the spot!”

“I’m down.”

“What time? Seven sound good?” Mya asks.

“Yeah, that should be fine.”

“I’m so excited to harass your man.” Mercedes rubs her hands together like Birdman.

“Two things. One, he’s not my man,”

“Yet,” they both chime in, cracking up.

“And, two!! Don’t embarrass me, please.”

“We would never,” Taylor smiles.

“Oh, boy.” She shakes her head.

“No, but seriously, how are things with him?”

“He’s so dreamy, you guys.” She gushes. “These last few weeks have been some of the best. We just sit and talk or we’ll go dancing or we’ll take a walk in the park or we go out to eat— did I mention that he’s fine!?”

“We’ve seen his hunky ass, girl!” Taylor nods. “That’s so cute! You deserve it, honestly.”

“Yeah, those duds you were runnin’ with, back in the day couldn’t even hold a candle to Isaiah.” She smirks.

“It’s so refreshing to hear you not call him swole arms.” She playfully rolls her eyes. “And thanks, girl. Them whores weren’t good for anything besides a dick drop off.” The trio crack up.

“Hell, at least they could do that right!”

“That, they did.” She snorts, the memories flooding back to her brain, making her shiver a little. “Whew!”

“You stupid, man.” Mercedes pokes her in her side. “But, you just tell swole arms that we don’t play bout our Mya paya, okay?”

“Got it.”

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Sitting across from one another in the dimly lit ice cream shoppe, the pair share a double scoop of vanilla and good conversation.

“They’re gonna tear me up, aren’t they?” He asks.

“I told them to behave, but Mercedes takes that as a challenge.” She shakes her head, eating a spoonful.

He laughs.

“Well, they’re just making sure you’re in good hands.”

“And, am I in good hands?” She questions.

“Like Allstate.” He says, making her giggle.

“I knew it was corny, but I like making you laugh.” He smiles.

“It was cute,” she laughs, eating another spoonful. “Like you.”

“Damn, that’s a bump down from pretty.” He frowns, pretends to be hurt.

“Aw,” she sits her spoon down and rubs the back of his hand. “You are pretty, 'saiah!”

“Mhm.” He plays with her fingers. “Not as pretty as you.”

“I don’t know,” their fingers intertwine, “I think you have me beat.”

“No, no. I’m only this pretty with some scruff on my face. You’d change your mind if you saw me without it.”

“Shut up,” she laughs, “you mean your beard?”

“It barely qualifies, since it's growing back in.”

“C’mere lemme get a better look.” She motions him towards her, so she can take a closer look at his handsome face.

She chances, softly gripping his chin, and turning his face in her hand to better inspect him.

“Looks good to me.”

“Yeah? Come a little closer.”

She obliges, chewing on her lip. Their faces are just a few inches away from each other. Squinting, she nods, grazing his “scruff” with her thumb.

“Still looks good to me.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,”

Grasping her chin with his free hand, he closes the space between them, kissing her like he’d been wanting to all day.

Melting into the kiss, their lips mold together as if they were long lost lovers.

Pulling away, he licks his lips. His hand still cupping her chin, her eyes reopening to find him already looking at her.

It was her turn to be flustered.

“What was that for?”

“I’ve wanted to all day. Thought it was the right time.”

“Hm… your timing is impeccable.”

“Yeah?” His brows raise.

“Mhm.” She smirks.

“Another pat on the back for me?”

“Shut up,” she laughs.

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Sprawled out on his couch, the pair sit up under one another, watching a movie.

“Are you comfortable?” He asks, his hand is at the base of her neck, strumming soothing circles with his fingertips. She’s nestled comfortably between his legs while his heartbeat drums a lullaby against her ear.

“This TV’s gonna be watching me in a minute,” she says, her eyes getting lower and lower. His low chuckle vibrates through her before she continues. “I saw my mama today, by the way. We talked about you.”

His ears perk up at the new information.

“Oh did you, now? What y’all say?”

“Said you're cute, you better treat me right and then something about grandchildren.” The end makes Isaiah sputter out a cough, and she barely conceals her laughter. “I’m not sure, I kinda tuned her out at that point.”

“Well, she doesn't have to worry about me treating you right, I'd be an idiot not to,” he says, tickling her neck, making her immediately scrunch up.

“Stop!,” she squeals, reaching back to smack his hand, “she also said she’d like to meet you. I politely told her to slow her roll.”

“I don’t know, mama. I think I’d like to meet the lovely woman that raised my favorite girl.” Her cheeks heat up, and she’s grateful she isn’t facing him.

She faux muses for a moment before responding. “Well in that case, I may be able to get something arranged.”

The conversation makes Isaiah aware that he needs to spend some time with his own mother. He makes a mental note to call her come morning.

The rest of their evening is spent with more playful teasing between binging reruns of Living Single.

☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.☆:☆: .☽ .☆: .☽ · 。ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆

Isaiah makes good on his promise to call his mama that following morning as soon as he settled in at work. They made plans to meet up with each other that same day during his lunch break.

“I’ll miss you, swole arms. We’ve been having lunch together for months now.” Mya jokes before they part ways for the hour.

“Wait, what—” he stops mid thought before answering his own question. “Mercedes and Taylor, huh?”

“Mercedes and Taylor,” she confirms with a laugh.

“You know I haven’t officially met those girls, and I don’t think I like ‘em too much,” he teases with a laugh.

“They’re harmless for  the most part. Anyway, have fun with your mama. I know she misses her boy.”

“Thanks, Mya.” He catches her off guard by stealing a quick kiss to her lips while there are no eyes on them. 

By the time she can get her bearings, he’s gone, and she has to flush the blush away from her cheeks before anyone could grill her about it.

A five minute ride later, and Isaiah is seated across from his mother at Lorraine’s, a soul food staple in the neighborhood.

They’re catching up over fried catfish, greens, and yams.

“Honey, I thought the Lord was gonna come down on his gold chariot and snatch us up before I got to see my baby,” she teases.

He can’t help laughing at his mother’s dramatics. “I know it’s been a minute since we’ve seen each other, mama. I’m sorry.” He puts his free hand over hers, having genuinely missed her.

“Oh baby, it’s alright. I know you’re at that big, fancy company living out all your dreams and making your mama proud. I couldn’t ask for more from you.”

Emotions he didn’t plan on feeling on a Friday afternoon caused his throat to become tight. He cleared it, gently squeezing her hand. “Yeah,” he agrees softly, so his voice doesn’t betray him.

“So,” she starts, switching topics, “tell me more about this girl you were going on about earlier. Mya, right?”

“Yes, ma’am.” He smiles with his whole face.

“Hmm. The way those eyes lit up like Christmas when I said her name just now tells me she’s special, ain’t she?”

“You can definitely say that.”

“Special enough for a couple grandchildren? You know I just hit 35 and the clock ain’t tickin’ backwards.”

He’s so stuck by that “grandchildren” word, he completely misses that she subtracted roughly 15 years from her actual age.

“Boy, close your mouth before you catch a fly. I’m just messing with you. A little bit.”

“Mama, you are entirely too much. Let me get to know her first, maybe learn more than her favorite flower, before you start talking about kids.”

“Fine,” she says, rolling her eyes jokingly. “But tell me what you do know about her.”

“Well,” he takes a moment to gather his thoughts together, “she’s so pretty, mama. I tell her that all the time. Maybe too much, but she doesn’t seem to mind. She’s really sweet. I mean, give you a cavity kind of sweet,” he pauses, chuckling at how corny that sounded, even to his own ears. “She makes me laugh.”

“Honey, you laugh at everything.” He’s interrupted by his mother’s gentle observation. 

“I know that, lady. But with her, it’s a deep, from the gut kinda laugh, ya know?”

She acknowledges her son with a nod, silently encouraging him to go on.

“And she’s really talented. Like, an out of the box type of talented. And ambitious. Crazy ambitious. All the time, she tells me the things she wants outta life, and I’m watching her get it in real time. I love that.” 

“Well, she’s already a country mile ahead of that last one, I tell ya that. What was her name again, Jezebel?”

He almost loses the sip of lemonade he took.

“It was Janaé, mama.”

“Ain’t that what I said? Anyway, that thang had your nose open like 7/11. I was starting to worry about you, boy.”

“Well, I like to pride myself on making better decisions now, mama.”

“Thank the Lord for small wonders,” she continued to tease him.

“I’m starting to question whether or not you love me, old lady.”

“Oh cut it out. I’m just teasing. You know I love my baby,” she says while pinching his cheek.

“Come on now, ma.” He gently removes her hand from his face, chuckling.

She sighs, looking at how happy her son looked at the moment. She debates whether or not she should relay the piece of information that could prove devastating for his progress.

“What’s on your mind, mama?” he asks before she can decide.

“ I wanna talk to you about something.”

“Is everything okay?” He sits up in his seat, concern already etching its way into his features.

“Everything’s fine. Don’t you worry.” She takes a moment to carefully choose her words. “It’s about your father.”

As soon as the sentence leaves her lips, all trace of emotion falls from his face as he sits back and downs the last of his drink.

“Hm. He finally die?” he asks coolly.

She knows she shouldn’t have been taken aback by such a response, but she found the sharp turn of his mood to be slightly jarring, even now.

“No, that’s not it.”

“Evil never really does die, I guess,” he says with a shrug.

“So what is it?” His gaze stays focused on the view outside of the large window, a technique learned in therapy to keep himself grounded.

“He’s been asking about you. Asking to see you. I wanted to give you a head’s up beforehand.”

“A head’s up?” he bites back a laugh. “I'm not gonna kill the man.”

Not that he’s never considered it.

March-ish, 2006, Dallas

A fourteen-year-old Isaiah polishes off the last of his breakfast, placing his dishes in the sink before heading off to Lincoln Jr. High. His mother isn’t there to see him off once again, having had to work her fourth double this week at Halifax Memorial Hospital, while his father had never seen him off, not once.

Third period English rolls around, and he receives a recent term paper face down. A big, red D is at the top right hand corner with a note saying “See me after class”. He sighs, rolling his eyes to the ceiling.

The bell rings, and his classmates file out, but he lags behind.

“Come sit down.” Miss Braxton motions to the empty seat nearest her desk.

He follows her instruction and plops down into the seat.

“Care to explain this unfocused, uninspired, half-attempt of an essay you decided to turn in?” she says while looking over the rim of her glasses.

He replies with a shrug of his shoulders and a barely audible “I don’t know.”

“Listen, I expect this kind of work from some of my students, but not you, Isaiah. I’ve seen what you’re capable of, and this,” she picks up the paper, waving it slightly for emphasis before continuing, “is nowhere near close. Remember, I’ve been your teacher since you were little, in the first grade always asking me for a new book to read. I see you doing big things and this lackadaisical attitude you’ve taken on isn’t going to get you there.”

A silence falls over the room as her words take a moment to run through his head.

“Um, imma be late for fourth period, so I gotta go,” he says, wanting to run far away from this conversation.

“You’re free to go. Don’t forget what I’ve said, okay?”

He nods, booking it for the door.

Harshly, he wipes at the tears just making their way down his face. He curses himself for his feelings.

“Well, if it ain’t my favorite punk ass bitch. Doing what he does best. Fuckin’ cryin’.” He’s greeted by the school bully, Darius, a thorn in his side for almost a year now.

“Your daddy ain’t teach you how to be a man yet? Oh I forgot, you don’t even know who the fuck he is. Just you and your mama. I see why you’re such a bitch.”

“Darius, don’t fuck with me today,” he warns, trying to get past the boy.

“Or what?? You gon’ run and tell mommy on me? I’m so scared. Fuck outta here,” the bully retorts, blocking his path and pushing the smaller boy in the center of his chest.

Without much thought, Isaiah cocks his hand back and clocks Darius directly in his eye. The blows don’t stop once he’s down though. He continues to rain blow after blow to his face while he’s crouched over his fallen form shouting profanities the entire while.

It takes two grown male teachers to finally pry him off the boy. He needs to be damn near dragged to the principal’s office.

His mother is less than pleased when she’s called out of work due to her son practically mauling the school bully.

Little did she know, that was only the beginning…

He sighs, coming back to the present moment.

“I didn’t think you would, son. I just thought it might be helpful to know,” she responds, to which he simply nods.

“Listen, whatever you decide to do, baby, mama’s got your back.” 

She places her hand over his and squeezes, which causes him to look back at her. He softens immediately, seeing his mother’s eyes shine with nothing but love and concern for him.

“I know.”

“Good.”

He uses the drive back to the office to compose himself into the man that his coworkers recognize.

Mya notices something off when he walks back into the office. To the untrained eye, he looks fine, but there’s a look in eye that she can name, being all too familiar with it herself.

After a meeting she could barely pay attention to,  she’s at the end of her workday, still consumed by what could be wrong with her normally cheerful coworker.

Deciding not to press him about it, she instead extends an offer to spend the evening with her.

“Hey,” she gently catches his attention as he’s walking toward the large, glass double doors.

He turns, giving her a smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

“Hey Mya. What’s up?”

She shifts her weight, almost feeling nervous. 

“Yeah, I just wanted to ask you if you wanted to come over to my house...if you could use the company. I know I could.”

He doesn’t answer right away, and she feels her heart start to sink. 

Seconds later, though, she’s gifted a smile much more genuine than earlier and she visibly relaxes.

“I’d love that.”

Extending his arm to her, she accepts, linking them together as they walk out of the building.

 A smooth playlist curated by Mya plays in the background as the pair lounges on her porch swing.

She’s upright while Isaiah's head is in her lap.

There are no words spoken between the two of them, but the silence is comfortable. 

She uses her slippered foot to softly rock them.

His eyes are closed while she runs her fingers through his soft coils.

Her gaze, however, is focused on the group of little brown girls across the street who are out playing jump rope.

The clack of their beaded hair, coupled with their laughter brings about a feeling of warmth.

“What is it that makes a man not want to be a father?”

Her eyes darted down toward the man in her lap, whose eyes are still closed.

Her fingers continue their relaxing pattern across his scalp, unsure of how to answer that.

He continues, “It’s like they don’t know or don’t fuckin’ care about the broken pieces they leave behind when they do that. And you know what the cold part about it is?”

She remains silent, knowing the answer is coming.

“He’s not even responsible for fixing the shit. Making sure I never turned out like him was 100 percent up to me. Tell me that’s not fucked up.”

He goes quiet for a moment, but she doesn’t feel compelled to break it.

She’s stunned by this new piece of him that he’s shared with her with no provocation from her.

“My father wants to see me. Wants to talk,” he finally reveals after several more moments of silence.

“How do you feel about it?” She asks cautiously.

There’s a pause before he responds, “I don’t know.”

“Well… until you know how you feel about it, I wouldn't make any final decisions. Process it first, you know?”

A sort of huffing sigh leaves him, before silence takes back over.

The slight, late October breeze blows over them, lightly tousling her hair across her face.

She removes the random strands, still maintaining her rocking with her foot.

“How would you handle this situation?” Isaiah asks, his eyes now open and looking up at her.

Not answering right away, her rocking stops. Instead it turns into a steady bounce with the opposite foot, as she tries to conjure up words for a moment such as that.

“I wouldn’t know. I haven’t talked to my father in years. Guess I’d have to process it, too.” She laughs, but it’s far from humorous.

Her eyes stay trained on the pastel numbered boxes from the hopscotch game the girls had played earlier, keeping her emotions at bay.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to make this about me.”

“You didn’t. It’s okay.” He sits up, his softened gaze on her reddened face.

“I guess we’re more alike than we realized.” He offers a laugh, which she returns. Yet, her slight frown gives her away.

“I’m sorry you have to go through this. It ain’t right.” She shakes her head.

“It’s not your fault, don’t be sorry. I’m just glad you listened. That was tough to share.”

“I understand.” She finally looks in his direction.

The lingering emptiness in their eyes mirror one another, making them feel far too vulnerable.

“Can I take you up on that hot toddy you were talking about?” He asks.

She laughs, holding out her hand for him to take.

“I thought you’d never ask.”

[silviakundera]

Now that the final SoKP episodes have passed thru my eyes... Things I miss from the novel:

* Sorry but Jiang Xuening should have killed You Fangyin's murderer with her own hands.

* Jiang Xuening becoming obsessed with Xie Wei's cooking, such that she loves to quietly hang out in the kitchen with him whenever there's a break in the scheming. It's their safe space.

* Jiang Xuening going from being in the palace and part of the target/victims of the rebellion in Life 1 to being one of the financial backers of it in Life 2 and accompanying their fighting forces as they move up through the country as Xie Wei outsmarts the emperor & Xue family & Lord Pingnan's forces at the same time. Spending her 2 years away building the capital needed to help spearhead the rescue of the princess and then go to fuck up the emperor who sent his sister a letter to end her life for the benefit of the country.... (chef's kiss)

* The glorious revolution and making the royal family kill each other to save themselves in order to demonstrate the type of people they are

* Jiang Xuening moving into Kunning Palace at the end, as basically the unofficial minister of finance. She ended up in the same place at the end, but hearts & minds are changed and so the result is different

* Jiang Xuening putting the pieces together that the princess died in the 1st life due to her pregnancy & the emperor cutting ties (intrigue!) Team Fuck The System helping her safely give birth to her son, who she loves despite his origin. Our fav lesbian never has to get married to another dude and can just chill with her son, the cabinet of ministers, and her Ning Ning (with psycho husband in tow, but hey nobody's perfect 😂). Using her power to spread schools for women's literacy with Xie Wei terrifying the detractors into submission.

* When they try to use the Jiang family in the capital to threaten XW and he's like, so what? I was gonna pay back those bastards next for Ning'er so you're saving me time lmaaaaaaoooo

* Speaking of which tbh I prefer the lack of a last ditch bandaid on the Jiang family relationship. She's let all of the pain of the past go and isn't personally seeking to take anything away from them in this life... but she is just done with it. Dad is nicer but he's let his wife behave like this and has been mostly hands off. Feels sorta like Story of Minglan to me - letting the favoritism & emotional abuse happen while playing nice guy. In both novel & drama, he spends years not protesting how Jiang Xuening is cast as the troublesome, uncouth, inferior model. But then the drama decides to rehabilitate them. (Though to be fair, even the drama was half-hearted on this 'wash', cause at the end she's mentioning they're not close and in the last scenes the parents are with the sister and Ning'er is with her found family.)

Improvements in the drama:

* I liked that we got to see Jiang Xuening tell multiple people that she loves XW before she gives him her answer. The angst of it being uncertain what conversations she's having with the princess & ZZ, the risk that she's going to abandon XW for being a hot mess... it made for good dramatic tension in the novel. But for the ROMANCE and creating a sense that the feelings he has are truly returned... It makes the ship better.

* The relationship that FL and ML had with the fake Xue Dingfei was richer. He was a standout for me.

* Yan Lin had a happier ending. He really stole my heart in this 2nd life and like Jiang Xuening I felt no need to see him haunted by his vile actions in another universe. It was emotionally satisfying in the drama to see him at peace. You got us all rooting for him.

* Consolidated the Lord Pingnan plot! We really didn't need to get into their factions and introduce more antagonists.

* Consolidated the You Fangyin romantic interests - no need for a marriage of convenience with 1 dude and then Xie Wei's buddy also carrying a torch.

* I felt like the drama gave Zhang Zhe more personality and I did find it delightful when he was "fighting" side by side with Xie Wei.

* Xue Shu (the Xue daughter) felt like a more developed, fully realized antagonist.

* As much as it "sings" in the narrative to have her end up in Kunning Palace with power in the government at the end of the novel (that was brilliant)... maybe emotionally it spoke to me more to see her initial wish from the start of her rebirth fulfilled. Her original reborn goal was to avoid reentering the palace & exit-out of everything to have a quiet life of peace. None of that power ever made her happy.

* Marriage scenes of the otp thank uuuuuuuuu

* No and actually.. After her royal marriage in the 1st life she definitely doesn't need another big celebration. And with her messed up family relationships and his dead parents... Them doing the marriage ceremony all on their own, cause it's another pact between them, makes a lot of sense and I dig it.

* The reverse callback of whispering while she's waiting for a kiss to say "I'm yours" instead of "get out" 👌👌👌

[jungle-angel]

Playing Doctor (Rhett Abbott x Reader)

Summary: Rhett will literally do anything to get out of going to the doctor, but a little roleplaying goes a long way

Warnings: SMUT, parenthood, Rhett trying to get out of going to the doctor's, cancer scare etc.

Tagging: @floydsmuse @bradleybeachbabe @callmemana @attapullman @sebsxphia @rhettabbotts @hangmanapologist

You groaned when you saw the number for the missed call on the answering machine for the phone in the kitchen.

"You ok hon?" Cecelia asked as she began prepping the raw green beans for dinner.

"That's the third time this week," you huffed. "Rhett was supposed to go for a doctor's appointment on Friday and it's Tuesday."

Cecelia chuckled a little. "Typical Rhett," she said. "Him and Royal are two of the same. They'll think of any excuse to not go, they both hate going."

"I know Cece, it's just annoying," you sighed, helping her snap off the ends of the green beans.

"Annoying as it is, they still need to be careful," Cecelia remarked. "Still haven't forgotten Roy's reaction when they found that cyst in my left tit last year"

"Ooooooh."

"Yep," Cecelia continued. "Nasty, nasty stuff. Mom had breast cancer and so didn't Aunt Anna, Aunt Betty and Aunt Mariah."

"Isn't that what Oma Heidi had too?" you asked.

"Oh Roy's mother had it bad," Cecelia answered. "Both his father and my father had it too but part of that was because his father was over in Vietnam and my father smoked for forty two plus years."

You and Cecelia chattered away when you heard Rhett trailing through the door, groaning as he kicked off his boots and hung his tan carhartt jacket up on the hook.

"Hey Ma," he said, greeting his mother cheerfully. "Something smells real good, what's for dinner?"

"The prime rib your father had sitting in the drop freezer," Cecelia answered. "By the way, I think ya'll might've missed something this afternoon."

"Huh?" Rhett said, his eyebrows scrunching together.

"I saw a message on the answering machine from the doctor's office," you said, giving him 'the look'.

"Oh um......yeah about that......ya see, a funny thing happened, Wes called and one of the cows had a breach birth and......"

"RHETT!!!!!"

"Hey ya'll try havin some creepy old dude feelin up your nuggets!" Rhett blurted out. "It's awkward as hell!!"

"Rhett need I remind ya'll that I have to have my tits felt up every six months?" Cecelia reminded him.

"No, but it's still awkward!"

"Oh you wanna talk about awkward?" you chuckled. "You wanna hear about my last gyno appointment?"

"NO!!"

"Well first she takes a speculum, which is like a freezing cold pair of salad tongs and widens the hole a little bit," you explained, delighting in watching him squirm. "And then she takes a little stick and scrapes my cervix......."

"LA LA LA LA!!!!! I CAN'T HEAR YA'LL!!!!" Rhett interrupted, covering his ears. "I can't hear ya'll!!!!"

"MY CERVIX DAMNIT!!!"

Rhett ran right out of the room and hurried upstairs to wash up for dinner, leaving you and your mother-in-law to laugh it off.

*****************************

Rhett fucking HATED being in the doctor's office.

He hated the cold, sterile feeling of the room, the smell of rubbing alcohol, but most of all, that you had managed to lure him to the truck with a trail of mini KitKat bars and the fact that he had been gullible enough to take the bait. But here he was, sitting in Pete's exam room in nothing but his shorts and awaiting the awkwardness that was to ensue.

The door creaked open and in walked Pete, one of only a few doctors in the whole of Wabang who had known the Abbotts since Royal was knee high.

"Ah there's Wabang's favorite bull rider," Pete remarked. "How's it going Rhett?"

"Not alot of complaints Pete," Rhett said, scratching the back of his neck.

"Well that's good," Pete said, glancing at his clipboard. "Wow.....looks like the last time you had a physical was the turn of the century."

Rhett made a face and nodded.

"Well, I'm glad you came in when you did," Pete remarked as he began probing Rhett's neck and along his jaw with his fingers. "According to the medical records you had some pretty nasty injuries with a bull last year."

Rhett had remembered clearly the ornery son of a bitch that had landed him in the ER right around the time of Amy's second birthday and having to have concussion tests every two weeks. "Quit the bull riding about a month ago," he said, squirming a little at the feeling of Pete's fingers on his neck.

"Good on you," Pete chuckled. "Told my son the same thing. Deep breath for me."

Rhett took four deep breaths as Pete listened to his lungs and then his heart. Good God he hated the feeling of that thing moving all over his chest and under his left tit and especially along his belly.

"Anything hurt?" Pete asked as his fingertips began probing Rhett's abdomen.

Rhett shook his head.

Good grief his hands were gnarled and cold. He winced a little when Pete felt up around his bellybutton, not from pain but from the uncomfortable wave of awkwardness that washed over him.

"Alright, looks good," Pete remarked. "Mind rolling over on your side for me?"

Rhett rolled over so Pete didn't have to see his face scrunching up, more so when Rhett heard the snap of a rubber glove.

*****************************

You came up from the basement with a pile of freshly dried laundry in the basket. The house was relatively quiet seeing as Amy had gone down for a nap, but the sight of your husband laying on the couch with a grumpy pout on his face told you that something wasn't as it seemed.

"Alright, talk to me cowboy," you said, setting the laundry down near the coffee table. "What happened?"

"Don't wanna talk about it," he said flatly.

You smiled and rolled your eyes. "Come on," you purred, slithering all over Rhett, the same way Garfield usually did. "I know something's up."

"I just had my balls and my asshole diddled by a creepy old dude with gnarled hands," Rhett answered, barely moving.

You snorted and giggled a little.

"I mean it darlin I ain't goin again," Rhett insisted.

"Rhett."

"I mean it."

"Ok, you know what you need?" you said. "I think you need a little help and that entails a little roleplaying."

Rhett arched his eyebrows. "Roleplaying?" he asked.

You nodded. It was something you did with your fifth graders when they were practicing for the spring play and had done with them ever since you had first had them in first grade.

Rhett joined you upstairs in the bedroom as you dug around looking for some things that your friend, Tara, had been storing at the house. You found her extra scrubs and medical equipment while Rhett stripped himself down to his shorts and seated himself on the edge of the bed.

"Can I get your name and date of birth sir?" you asked him.

"Only if ya'll buy me dinner first," Rhett answered, wiggling his eyebrows.

You rolled your eyes. "Name and date of birth please sir," you told him.

"Mike Rotch, January twenty-nine, ninety three," Rhett answered with a shit eating grin.

"Mike R......NO!!!!!"

Rhett laughed, an annoyed groan escaping your throat as you began to probe his neck and jaw, feeling his lymphnodes for anything out of the ordinary. You could feel the low purr in his throat as he leaned in for a kiss which you couldn't help but return.

"Mind laying back for me?" you asked him.

Rhett lay on his back before you began to gently probe his belly with your fingertips. "Lower," he said. "Just a little lower........nah that's still too high......there you go....."

You rolled your eyes, still feeling lower and lower until you hit pubes. A naughty little thought had bloomed in your head as you took his flaccid dick in your hand.

"Oh woah wait....wait a sec what are you....??" he said before sucking in a breath.

"Oh I'm sorry, where does it hurt? Here?" you asked him cheekily.

Rhett groaned as you slowly gave him a few gentle tugs and rubbed the underside of his balls. "Fuck......feels so good darlin," he hissed.

You took his dick in your hand again, gently massaging and caressing his shaft and his tip with your thumb until he had hardened right in your grip. "You sure it hurts there?"

"Feels so fuckin good," he groaned again, thrusting his hips into your hand.

You leaned up and kissed him full on the lips, your tongue slipping over his bottom lip and into his mouth to sneak a taste of him. "Well hello nurse," Rhett purred.

You giggled as you helped him get the scrubs off. Rhett practically tore your panties off of you, shoving his cock deep inside your already wet pussy. You moaned feeling his lips and tongue on the curve of your neck, his hips ramming into yours with so much force that the bed shook and knocked against the wall. You felt him gutter into you just moments later, the both of you out of breath and thoroughly fucked enough to forget your troubles.

"Feel better?" you asked, your head resting on Rhett's chest.

"Loads better," Rhett purred.

"Think you'll go back once a year from now on?"

Rhett kissed your lips and rolled on top of you, pressing you a bit further into the mattress. "For you darlin? Anything."

And ever since then, you never had a problem getting Rhett to go back to the doctor's office.

[strangeshoepatrolbandit]

Sunshine follows with Sunfall PT.8

Warnings: Talks of birth and pregnancy, alcohol(whiskey), suggestive content, lots of timeskips.

Series Masterlist

Today is Judith's birthday!!!

~☆~

It's October 27th, Judith's seventh birthday.

Seven years ago, you went into labor at 1:23AM and finally delivered her at 3:07AM.

You silently made your way into her room, flicking off the projector nightlight. You turn towards her small bed, smiling to yourself as you sit on the side, leaning behind her. You smoothed your hand over her dark hair. "Judy Jayne," you sang her nickname softly. "Time to wake up, birthday girl."

She stirred, pouting since she's not a morning person, but a smile grew on her face when she opened her eyes and looked at you, excited because of her birthday.

"Good morning!" You grinned.

"Good morning, Mommy." Her voice wasn't as upbeat as yours, but that was just the morning grogginess.

You hummed a soft tune to her and smoothed down her hair one last time before helping her out of bed, not caring about tidying the orange sheets. The two of you walked into the kitchen, and you helped her up onto the elevated seats that go to the breakfast bar. You then put a plate in front of her, French toast strips with some orange slices, and sausage.

"Thank you, Mommy!" She squeals, watching you put syrup and powdered sugar on her cut-up French toast.

"You are so very welcome." You rounded the counter and kissed her head. "I have some gifts."

"Really?!" Judith asked excitedly, acting as if she didn't get gifts every year on her birthday.

"Yes." You laughed slightly, walking into the living room, only to come back with some gifts in your arms. Periwinkle scurried into the kitchen after you, almost as if he wanted to see Judith's gifts as well.

You placed a Hello Kitty stuffed animal on the bar, watching as Judith smiled widely. Then you placed a bracelet making kit down.

"Thank you, Mommy!" Judith thanked you again, reaching her arms out for a hug.

You wrapped your arms around her smaller body. "Of course, my girl!"

"Hurry up and eat! We're gonna have a big party with all of your uncles, grandpa, and all your friends, remember?"

Judith nodded and quickly went back to her breakfast, eyeing her gifts with a smile as she ate.

×××

Your keys jiggled in door to your apartment, opening up easily. Judith sang loudly to herself as she carried a gift bag over to the couch. You yourself carried a two more.

You locked the front door behind the two of you, placing two bigger bags on the floor next to the couch. You walked over to the archway to the kitchen, going to turn on the light, but you jump as soon as your eyes land on a large body. "Oh my God!"

The person laughed, causing Judith to run in, instantly hearing the sound of her father's laughter. "Daddy!"

"Hey, Sunshine." He groaned a little as he bent to pick her up. Her little arms and legs went around him as she clung to him. "Happy Birthday!"

"Thank you, Daddy!" She smiled.

"I made the two of you dinner." He looked at you. "Hopefully, you guys aren't too full from your party."

You smiled and shook your head. "Don't worry."

Jason nodded and looked back at the girl in his arms. "It's your favorite."

"Chicken Alfred!" Both Jason and you laugh from her mispronunciation of 'Chicken Alfredo'.

Jason carried her back into the living room to set her down, and you took it upon yourself to plate the alfred he had in a tupperware container. It's still warm.

You grab three plates and three forks, one of them being a children's fork.

Just as you're pouring some drinks, Jason comes back into the kitchen. "Actually, I have a little something for you and I.... you know, to celebrate the fact that we made a life."

"Oh no." You laughed a little, wondering what Jason could have brought.

He stands next to you, reaching into the bag he brought as it sits on the counter. He looks at you and raises his eyebrows, smirking before pulling out what he had. An expensive bottle of whiskey.

"I don't know if you drink or not... but..."

You roll your eyes and smile, picking up Judith's plate and drink. "Go grab some whiskey glasses."

And with that, you walk back into the living room.

You could indulge tonight.

×××

After Judith went to bed, Jason and you stood in the kitchen, talking about anything really.

The two of you had drinks in your hands, both of you honestly a little tipsy.

"There's a dollhouse in my car that I need help with getting out." You tell him about one of Judith's gifts and he offers to help you out with it tomorrow night, meaning he'll come back soon.

The two of you fall into a comfortable silence, no longer awkward for some reason. Maybe it's the alcohol?

"Remember when you outgrew your clothes and had to wear mine until we bought you some more?" Jason asks, chuckling as he holds his glass to his lips.

You laugh and nod. "Yeah, I was so big."

Jason looks at you wistfully, speaking with a newfound softness in his voice. "You were really cute with the belly."

You stare back at him and smile slightly. "Thank you. Thank you for Judith."

Jason's gaze is so intense. He was hanging on to every word you spoke, listening to you like you're guiding him to the garden of Eden. "No. Thank you for actually making and birthing her."

He was so close that you could smell the familiar scent that used to linger around your shared home, the scent you used to smell when you'd hug and cuddle up to him.

Tobacco, gunpowder, leather, something earthy, something sweet, and a spritz of a generic men's cologne.

But something was different.

He also smelled like your home. Fresh linen and lavender. Something so small, yet so big to you.

Maybe it's the familiarity. Maybe it's just him. But somehow, you ended up pressed against the counter, kissing him for the first time in years.

A part of you wanted to slap yourself for kissing the man who left you and your daughter for an entire year, yet another part of you could burst out crying from how much you've missed this. When Jason and you split, pieces of your hearts died. Now, it feels as if you are both healing each other.

He had set down his whiskey glass, now running his hands up and down your torso as the intensity grew with the passage kiss. Your arms made their way around his neck and you put your fingers in his hair, tugging on the dark strands.

Jason broke away from the kiss so that he could trail more down to your neck, getting a mixture of both of your spit onto your skin.

"Relax, we're not trying to make another kid." You pant, making Jason chuckle.

He trailed his kisses back up your neck, to your jaw, to your chin, but not to your lips.

The two of you looked into each other's eyes, sensing the yearning and desperation.

You both knew how this night would end.

~☆~

Taglist: @keira324 @dakotali @22nranjan @skepvids @harpy-space @godknows-shetried @mirrorball-6 @macncheese69420666 @parkjammys @yyxy27 @burningkidanchor @elleclairez @amecchii @chickennugghon @marvelworldlover @oakexists @p0tterhead934 @makhaia @cassini-among-the-stars @tsukishimarawr @flowestallen @attackonnat @90s-belladonna @sucker4seresin @riahpickle-blog

[1000roughdrafts]

hey! if you take requests, i’m just wondering if you’d consider a sister winchester one? maybe her at 18? i love your writing so much, and i’d really love something like a hurt reader/dying reader?? something super angsty ahaha

Oh, for sure! Angst is my favorite! (as I'm sure you can tell by the word count lol) sorry it’s taken me like 3 years to get to this 😞

A/N: this was meant to post 2/28/24 because I wanted to ease into coming back with an every other week posting schedule BUT I’m just too excited and antsy for that lol also it’s set in Season 1, Episode 1

Thank you by the way!

Title: Please Wake Up

Warnings: swearing, graphic description of injury and illness, blood angst, hurt/dying reader, depiction of medical procedures, takes place in season 1 episode 1 :)

Word Count: 5.8k

Being third born after two boys, Y/N always felt like she had big shoes to fill. Despite her best efforts to impress the man, she never really formed a bond with John. Her next role model was Dean, who became more of a father to her than John ever was or could be.

Until her eleventh birthday, Dean did her hair into pigtails every day, partly because he hadn't learned to do any other hairstyle but mostly because he thought it was the cutest on her. He'd pack her and Sam's lunch with snacks he'd bought from vending machines and even pretend to take her on hunts because he knew she wanted to be exactly like him.

When she wasn't learning about monsters and guns with Dean, she spent time with Sam. He'd help her with her homework or play board and card games. They have as much in common as Y/N and Dean. Neither Sam nor Y/N got along with John, and neither remember their mothers. 

Y/N's mother was a woman John met in Nebraska three years after the boy's mom died. The affair only lasted a night, but to his surprise, he heard from her again six months later with the news that they had a baby girl on the way. John was shocked and heartbroken. He couldn't bear the thought of bringing another child into the life of hunting.

John kept his distance, adamant that Y/N would be better off without him, and when another three months of silence went by, he figured that Y/N's mother came around to see it his way. Unfortunately, her pregnancy was complicated, as was the birth, and it turned out that having Y/N is what killed her. 

When John got the call, he had half a mind to let the state take custody of little Y/N. Indeed, they would provide her with a better life than he could. John decided to meet her at least, and when he laid eyes on her perfect little face, he couldn't bring himself to abandon her. 

Y/N was barely sixteen when Sam left for college. While she was proud of him for putting himself first, it broke her heart for him to go the way he did. She missed him more and more every day, often keeping Dean up at night with her sniffling and crying. After a while, he would get into bed next to her when the tears started and sing Hey Jude while playing with her hair to help her fall asleep. That went on for another six months before she finally started to fall asleep without crying. 

For her seventeenth birthday, Dean came across a necklace he'd wanted to get for her since Sam left. From his wallet, he took out the only picture he had of the sibling trio, representing the single moment of their life where John treated them like regular kids, and using his pocket knife, he carved around their heads and bodies to match the exact size of the locket, smiling proudly at himself when it fit perfectly. 

Now at eighteen, she stands next to the Impala while Dean lugs their bags out, drops them into the trunk, and slams it shut. He heads for the driver's door but stops when he realizes Y/N hasn't opened hers yet. Eyebrows raised, he twirls a finger in the air as if to say, 'Let's get a move on.'

"Are you ever gonna teach me how to drive, Dean?" she asks. "I mean, you've got to, you know?" 

"No, I don't. Get in," Dean says. She does so with a huff. Dean checks the mirrors before backing out of their parking spot. Turning to Y/N, he says, "Besides, as long as I'm around, you don't need to," but softens his face into a smile when he looks at her. "Cause there's no way in Hell I'll ever let you drive my car." 

Y/N lets out a soft chuckle. "It doesn't have to be this car, Dean!" She rolls the window down, letting the cool breeze hit her face. "What happens if we get separated and I'm being chased by… I don't know, something that has super speed, and my only way back to you is to steal a car and -" 

"Stop. First of all, you should know that I'd never put you in that kind of danger," Dean says, disgusted by the mere thought. He lets out a long sigh. "I'll teach you," he says, looking at her gleaming smile. He tries his damnedest to see her for the adult she's becoming, but he only sees the happy baby in pull-ups he used to feed marshmallows and jello to on a motel room floor. "Just… not yet, okay?" 

She scoffs, "Most people learn to drive when they're only fifteen. I mean, you took me to freaking Vegas with a fake ID for my birthday, for fuck's sake!" 

"I said not yet, Y/N!" he says, shooting her the 'dad look' he's been perfecting since she was four. 

"Fine," she grumbles. She clasps her hands, "So I was looking through news articles, and there seem to be vamps in the next town. Should we be on that?" 

Dean clears his throat and needlessly adjusts the rear-view mirror. "Actually, kiddo, we're on something else right now." He keeps his head straight but glances at her out of the corner of his eyes. Whispering, he says, "We're gonna go get Sammy." 

Y/N's eyes widen as her head whips to look at him. "What?" 

He keeps his eyes on the road, "yeah, uh, with Dad missing... we could use the help," he says, gripping the steering wheel tighter. 

"But Sam's at college!" Y/N scoffs, "he wanted out!" 

"He abandoned us!" he shouts, shaking his head at himself when he notices her shoulders tense. Her eyes peer into her lap, where her hands lie folded. “Look Y/N/N, I just… I can't shake this awful feeling that something is wrong." He waits for a response from her, but she only nods with thin lips. She tunes him out and focuses on the wind hitting the window. "I gotta make sure they're okay," he says softly. 

Over the years, Y/N has learned to trust Dean's intuition, but right now, it just feels like he's being selfish. She opts to stay quiet, even if it makes a long drive longer.

Y/N jolts awake at the sound of the trunk slamming shut. She takes a moment for her eyes to adjust to the darkness. She doesn't see Dean next to her, so she scans her surroundings through squinted eyes, hoping for a clue about her whereabouts. She finds a gas station receipt in her lap and flips it over to see the scribbles of Dean's handwriting telling her to 'stay put or else.' She rolls her eyes, crumpling it into a ball to throw it into the backseat.

She hears the voices of two familiar men, one of whom she hasn't heard in two years. Her heart races, and she fumbles with the seat belt, trying to unhook it with shaky hands. She jumps out of the car and turns in time to see Dean leaning on the back of the Impala.

"It's a law school interview," Sam says, "and it's my whole future on a plate," he glares.

"Law school?" Dean asks with a smirk. Y/N walks over to stand next to Dean. He shoots a quick, acknowledging glance her way. Sam's eyes shift between Dean and Y/N, softening when they land on Y/N, "so we got a deal or not?" he asks flatly.

Dean says nothing but lightly nods his head. Y/N runs towards Sam, nearly knocking him over with a hug.

"Y/N/N," he smiles. Pulling her even closer to him, he wraps his arms tightly around her back and kisses the top of her head. "I missed you," he whispers.

"I missed you, too," she says, her eyes welling up with tears. Sam looks at Dean just in time to see him press his lips together with an 'I told you so' in his eyes. Sam shakes his head, squinting at Dean just before he lets go of Y/N.

"Kay, I gotta put a bag together," he sighs, "I'll be right back."

He turns to head for the door, and Y/N doesn't take her eyes off him until he disappears into the building. She blinks her eyes and turns to face Dean. He pushes himself off the back of the car and silently heads for the driver seat.

Sam and Y/N sit in the car at a gas station while Dean heads for snacks. Sam opens his door but quickly looks over his shoulder to check on Y/N. This is when he notices the box of tapes sitting next to her. Intrigued, he shifts in the chair and asks her to hand them to him. Y/N is hesitant because it's hard to say how Dean would react, and she's always hated being in the middle of their fights but does so anyway. Sam rests his tongue between his lips as he takes the box from Y/N. Stretching his legs out of the car, he rests the box in his lap to filter through them.

"Hey," Dean says from behind the Impala, his mouth wrapped around a candy bar, "either of you want breakfast?" he asks, holding a soda and a bag of chips.

Y/N waits for Sam to answer first. "No, thanks," he says, glancing Dean's way momentarily.

"I do," Y/N smiles.

"So how'd you pay for that stuff? Three of you still running credit card scams?" Sam says, going back to looking through the cassettes.

"Yeah, well, hunting ain't exactly a pro ball career," Dean says, putting the gas nozzle back into the pump.

Y/N chimes in, "Besides, all we do is apply," she shrugs, "it's not our fault they send us the cards."

"Yeah? And what names did you write on the applications this time?" he asks, swinging his legs back inside the car and closing the door behind him.

"Uh, Burt Aframian," Y/N answers. Dean gets into the seat, handing Y/N the drink and chips. "Thank you," she chirps.

"And his son Hector," Dean adds, "scored two cards out of the deal."

"Sounds about right. I swear, man. You've gotta update your cassette tape collection."

Dean frowns, nearly offended. "Why?"

"Well, for one, they're cassette tapes, and two," Sam holds one up, "Black Sabbath? Motorhead?" he says, dropping them to grab another, "Metallica?" he laughs, "It's the greatest hits of mullet rock," he says as Dean rips the Metallica tape from his hand with a glare.

"Well, house rules, Sammy." Dean pops the tape into the player with a tight smile, "driver picks the music, shotgun shuts their cake-hole," he says, dropping the empty case into the box. "Isn't that right, Y/N?" he smirks into the rear-view mirror and smiles when he sees her roll her eyes.

"You know, Sammy is a chubby twelve-year-old," Sam scolds, "it's Sam, okay?"

Turning the volume up, Dean cocks his head to the side, "sorry. I can't hear you. The music's too loud," he says with a slight chuckle.

Crashing a crime scene where police are still investigating is just another Saturday with Dean for Y/N, but seeing Sam's eyes widen at the box of Dean's fake IDs calls attention to how out of the norm this life is. Dean makes wise-ass comments to the cops, as usual, and Sam stomps on Dean's foot. Dean responds by smacking Sam's head as they bicker on the way back to the car, but Y/N can't help but grin from ear to ear.

Even when her brothers are arguing, Y/N couldn't possibly be happier. Today is her first hunt with both of her brothers and the first time in far too long since the three of them had been together for any reason.

They make their way to find Amy, who they learn is the girlfriend of the victim from listening to the cops on the bridge. They stop her while she's putting up missing posters, and after lying about being distant relatives of her boyfriend, they ask if she'd be willing to answer some questions to find him.

… "It's kind of this local legend," Amy's friend says after a few minutes of chatting. Massaging her thumb with her other hand, she continues, "This one girl? She got murdered out on Centennial, like decades ago." Dean glances over at Sam and Y/N, who listen intently, "Well, supposedly, she's still out there. She hitchhikes, and whoever picks her up? Well, they disappear forever."

At a local library, Dean searches the archive page for any murders on Centennial Highway with no results. Sam shoves Dean's chair, and when it rolls back, he scoots his chair to the computer to take over, earning him a slap from Dean. After replacing 'murder' with 'suicide,' a news article pops up.

"This was 1981. Constance Welch, twenty-four years old, jumps off Sylvania Bridge, drowns in the river," Sam reads.

"Does it say why she did it?" Y/N asks, scooting her chair closer to Sam to try and read the screen.

"Yeah," Sam says.

"What?" Dean says with raised eyebrows.

"An hour before they found her, she calls 911. Apparently, her two little kids are in the bathtub. She leaves them alone for a minute, and when she comes back, they aren't breathing." Sam lets out a breath, "both die," he says in a whisper.

The air grows thick around them, and Y/N frowns. "That's terrible," she says, shaking her head.

"'Our babies were gone,'" Sam reads, "'and Constance just couldn't bear it,' said husband Joseph Welch."

"Hmm," Dean points to the picture on the screen, "that bridge look familiar to you?"

They hit the bridge at nightfall. Crickets sing to water drumming against the rocks as it rushes under their feet. The clouds hang low in the sky, giving the air around them a haze.

"So," Dean says, peering over the bridge at the water, "this is where Constance took the swan dive," he says, leaning against the rail next to Y/N. 

"So you think Dad would have been here?" Sam asks in disbelief, looking over at Dean. 

"Well, he's chasing the same story, and we're chasing him," Dean shrugs, turning to walk down the bridge. 

Sam turns to follow. "Okay, so now what?" he says, forcing a breath through his nose. Y/N walks right next to him, still scared to let him out of her sight. 

"Now we keep digging until we find him. Might take a while," Dean grumbles. 

Sam stops walking, "Dean," he says, raising his hands before dropping them. "I told you. I've gotta be back by Monday." 

"Monday," Dean says, pivoting to make grueling eye contact with Sam, but only turns his body enough that he's still facing the bridge's railing. "Right," he says, shaking a finger, "the interview." The bridge creaks under him as he turns the rest of the way. 

"Yeah," Sam nods. 

"Yeah, I forgot. You're really serious about this, aren't you?" Dean says, shifting his weight between his feet. "You think you're just going to become some lawyer? Marry your girl?" Dean asks, the animosity growing with each word. 

Sam shrugs, "maybe. Why not?" 

Dean's voice roughens, "Does Jessica know the truth about you? I mean, does she know the things you've done?" 

Sam takes a few threatening steps toward Dean, "No, and she's not ever going to know," he scowls. 

"Well, that's healthy," Dean sneers. "You can pretend all you want, Sammy, but sooner or later, you're going to have to face up to who you really are," he says, turning around to continue walking. 

Sam huffs, "Who's that?" 

"You're one of us," Dean shrugs, a hand gesturing towards Y/N. 

"Hey! Leave me out of this," Y/N grumbles from ahead. 

"No," Sam says, speed walking towards Dean, "I'm not like you," he says, turning around as he stops in front of Dean. "This is not going to be my life."

Dean keeps his jaw tight. "Well, you have a responsibility to..." 

Y/N feels the tension rising and tries to plead with them to stop arguing, but they ignore her. "Guys!" she shouts again. 

"To Dad? And his crusade?" Sam scoffs. "If it weren't for pictures, I wouldn't even know what Mom looks like! And what difference would it make? Even if we do find the thing that killed her," he shakes his head, "Mom's gone. And she isn't coming back." 

Dean grips Sam's shirt and swings him around and against the bridge's railing with a clunk at Sam's weight against it. 

Y/N flips around and runs to their side, "Dean, what are you doing? Are you crazy?" She panics. But Dean continues to ignore her as he glares at Sam. 

After a long, breathless pause, Y/N shouts again, "Dean!" 

The misty air is still between them, and even the wind seems too frightened to move. It's as if the world is put on pause.

Dean's eyebrows raise, and he keeps a firm grip on Sam's shirt. Under his breath, he says, "Don't talk about her like that." 

He throws Sam's jacket from his hands and takes a few stabilizing steps backward in one movement. Y/N runs to check on Sam, who shakes her off with an "I'm fine" that sounds muffled compared to the pounding of her heart. A few tears escape her when she looks over at Dean walking away from them, but she doesn't realize she's crying until the taste of salt hits her lips. 

Her eyes return to Sam, shaking her head in disgust that Dean would treat him like that. She knew it had been rough for Dean since Sam left for college, but hell, it's been hard on her, too, and she's not throwing anyone against the side of a bridge!

Dean halts, “Sam. Y/N!” he calls. Y/N turns with a full-body glare, but her eyes widen when she sees a woman in a long, white dress standing on the bridge's railing. The woman looks over at them, and Y/N can see the resemblance to the picture of Constance. The woman's hair and dress sway in the wind, and she keeps her eyes on them as she allows herself to drop from the ledge. 

With a grunt, Sam rushes to the railing to look over it for her, Dean and Y/N not far behind him. 

"Where'd she go?" Dean barks. 

Breathless, Sam pushes out an "I don't know." 

The roar of the Impala's engine turning on startles them, their bodies whipping around just in time to see the headlights flick on. 

"What the-," Dean says. 

"Who's driving your car?" Y/N asks. 

Without taking his eyes off of the car, Dean pulls his keys from his pocket and jingles them, stealing Sam and Y/N's attention to them in unison. The engine revs, drawing back their wide eyes to the Impala. The tires squeal as the car begins to speed towards them. 

"Y/N, go! Go!" Dean says with a hand on each of his siblings, spinning them around to run in the opposite direction. Dean presses his hand firmly on Y/N's back as they run, keeping himself between her and the car. They run as fast as they can until Dean can feel the Impala's breath on his ankles, and he guides them towards the bridge's railing. 

Y/N's heart feels like a brick in her chest, weighing her down at the thought of jumping over. "I can't," she says in a breath, and all in a split second, she feels like her feet are cemented into the bridge's planks as Sam jumps over. "No!" she screams as Dean grips onto her arm, pulling them both over the bridge. 

Sam hangs from the ledge of the bridge, shouting for Y/N as her screams are washed out with a big splash. "Y/N!" he calls again from the back of his throat, climbing up the bridge to get on his knees. He looks over the bridge, scanning for Y/N and Dean, calling out when he sees his brother, "Dean! You alright?" 

"I'm super," Dean grumbles with an outstretched thumbs up. Lying on his back, half submerged in the muddy water. 

"I can't see Y/N! Where's Y/N?" Sam panics, and when the words hit Dean's ears, he springs to his feet in a second. He whirls around in a circle as he searches for her. 

"Y/N!" Dean shouts, wiping mud from his face. He paces around, "Y/N, where are you?" he yells, half-expecting her to pop out from behind a bush to scare him. 

The world spins around him for a moment, utterly void of sound aside from a ringing in his ears as Dean tries to comprehend what is happening. He closes his eyes tight, shaking his head to clear away the fog that covers him. They open onto the water, catching the moon's glimmer reflecting off something. He runs towards it, hopping from rock to rock until he finds Y/N's broken locket stuck in algae. Dean picks it up with shaky hands, recalling how her face lit up when he first gave it to her. She'd be devastated to see its state now. Fear spills down him in an icy chill.

His head swivels around in search of her. Tears, that he refuses to let fall, poke at his eyes when he sees her lying face down in the water, a bloody rock next to her.

“Y/N!” He shouts, rushing to her. He kneels to pull her out of the water by her shoulder, turning her over so that her back rests against his knee. "Y/N!" he yells again, and when she doesn't respond, he grabs her by the waist and hoists her over his shoulder. He grunts, shifting his weight before jogging for the shore. "Sam! I got her!" 

"Dean! Is she okay?" He calls out as he sprints down the side of the hill to catch up to them. The brothers reach the shore simultaneously, and Dean drops to his knees to gently set Y/N on the ground in front of him, Sam following suit. 

"Come on, be okay, be okay, be okay, be okay," Dean pleads softly, placing two fingers on her neck. His heart is beating so hard that he can't tell if it's her pulse he's feeling or his own. "Sam, I can't feel anything," he says. Dropping an ear to her mouth, he adds, "And I don't think she's breathing." 

"Call 911," Sam demands, ripping his jacket off to tie around Y/N's bleeding head wound. He quickly inspects the rest of her body for any bleeding before placing a hand on her chest. Looking up at Dean, who stands frozen, Sam puts his free hand on Dean's shoulder, "now, Dean!" he shouts, shoving him. 

Sam tilts Y/N's head back, checking again for a pulse, a breath, a twitch, a shudder, anything that meant he wouldn't have to perform CPR on his baby sister. He places his hands on her chest, one over the other, pausing in case her heart miraculously started again, but all he feels under his palms is the stillness of Y/N's wet and cold chest. 

Sam begins chest compressions, and the tears he'd been holding back rush out uncontrollably when he feels her ribs break under his palms. It makes him want to pull away, but he forces himself to continue. Dean watches in wide-eyed horror as he gives the 911 operator their location when asked, keeping his free hand pressed against his forehead. 

"Anything?" he shakily shouts at Sam after what feels like hours. Sam ignores him, counting out loud until he hits thirty again. He stops compressions to blow a shuddering breath into Y/N's mouth, watching her chest rise and fall before delivering another. "Hello! Is anybody on the way? My sister is dying here!" Dean shouts into the phone, but all that meets his ears is static. 

"Dean," Sam says with a heavy breath, beginning compressions again. "You gotta take over," he says between breaths. 

Without question, Dean drops his phone to the ground as he falls to his knees next to her, "come on, Y/N," he pleads, ignoring the burning in his knees as he places his hands together on top of Sam's. Sam leaves his hands under Dean's for just one compression before pulling away. 

"Okay, that's ten. You've got twenty more before breaths," Sam says before they count out loud together with every push into Y/N's chest. 

Dean is growing tired by his third round of compressions, but the sirens in the distance electrify him, giving him the energy he needs to continue. 

His face scrunches up as he musters the emotional and physical strength to keep going. Sam hurries to his feet, "don't stop, Dean, you're doing great!" he says with a palm at him. 

"Don't stop," Dean repeats mindlessly, "don't stop." 

Sprinting towards the paramedics, Sam waves his arms, shouting, "Down here! We're down here!" before he knows it, a group of professionals sprint down the hill, the gurney in tow. One takes a story from Sam as one tries to pull Dean away so the other two can take over caring for Y/N. 

"No, I can't stop!" he cries, which grabs Sam's attention, "don't stop," he nearly whispers, hands pumping into Y/N's chest. 

Sam rushes over and lowers himself to Dean's level. "Dean, let go. It's okay, they'll take it from here," he says, grabbing onto Dean's hands to pull him off of Y/N. They watch the paramedics in shock as they cut the shirt, bra, and pants off of Y/N, inspecting her skin. The first responders put what look like stickers with wires attached to them onto her chest and pull out the AED, telling everyone to stand clear before delivering a shock with a beep. Then, there was a pause and the silence that follows is deafening. Nothing. They check for a pulse and call clear again, shocking her. Then, nothing. Again. 

In the hospital's hallway, Dean tries to tune out the surround sound of constant beeping. His elbows rest on his scraped and bloody knees with his head held in his hands. He rocks back and forth, battling with himself. He sheds tears both out of fear for his sister's well-being and of guilt that he did the very thing he promised her he wouldn't: put her in danger.

The clacking of Sam's shoes pulls Dean from his homemade mental Hell. Dean lifts his head, quickly wiping his eyes before grabbing the cafeteria coffee. Sam's familiar smell of motel soap and deodorant washes away the torturous smell of hand sanitizer.

"Thanks," Dean mutters, taking a sip of the coffee before placing it next to him on the cold tile floor. 

Sam's eyes are red and puffy. Dean struggles to comprehend how Sam doesn't even try to hide the tears coming down. He often admires his brothers ability to wear his heart on his sleeve, though he'd never admit it. He wonders who he's being 'strong' for in this moment because it's certainly not himself.

Clearing his throat, Sam pulls his pants up slightly at the thighs before sitting on the bench next to Dean. He glances up at the ceiling momentarily, waiting for the announcement to end before asking, "Any news yet?"

Dean shakes his head. "No," he says in a raspy voice, forcing his eyes to look up and down the hall. "Excuse me," he says, standing to interrupt a nurse before she can enter a different room. "Would you mind helping us find whoever we need to talk to for an update on room 221?" he asks, gesturing to the door he hasn't been able to even look at since arriving.

Her eyes flutter to Sam, then the door, and back to Dean before she somberly nods. "Of course," she says, setting her pen back onto the clipboard as she turns to head in the direction she came.

Dean wants to return to his seat, but his body feels like an anchor. He sucks in a sharp breath. His shoulders tighten into his neck and with weak arms his hands fall to his hips. He hangs his head, clenching his teeth and pulling his face to suppress the tears. Sam jumps up to Stand with Dean, placing a hand tightly on his shoulder.

"She'll be alright," Sam says, not fully believing himself, "she's a Winchester; she has to be." 

Dean quickly straightens himself out because damn it, he's the one that's supposed to be taking care of his younger siblings - not the other way around.

"Sam and Dean Winchester?" a deep voice echoes the hall and they whirl around to greet the doctor. Dean quickly slaps the tears from his face. "I'm Dr. Ferguson," he says, holding his arm up to shake hands with Sam, then Dean. "Let's go somewhere more private to talk."

"We're good here," Dean spits. 

"Very well," the doctor sighs, looking down the hall behind him. He shuffles them closer to the wall and out of the traffic flow. "Well, while we were able to restart her heart, I'm afraid your sister has sustained a substantial injury to the head," he says, "the trauma caused the tissue around her brain to swell quite rapidly, and well, we have her on a ventilator, but," he lets out a breath, "we haven't seen as much progress as we were hoping for. She's technically in a coma right now, but we hope to see her come out of it in the coming weeks." 

"Weeks?" Dean bellows.

"Yes, I'm afraid that's standard recovery time for an injury of this magnitude. Although, we'd be having an entirely different conversation if not for your quick thinking in the field," he says with a tight-lipped smile, eyes jumping from Dean's to Sam's, "it's a long road to recovery, but this is a good start." 

"And what happens if she doesn't wake up?" Sam asks. 

"We will do everything in our power to ensure that doesn't happen," the doctor nods. 

"Thanks, doc," Sam croaks. "Can - can we see her?" he stutters. 

"Of course," he says, pushing the door open with his fingertips, "go on in," he says.  

Sam immediately notices Dean's hesitancy when they exchange a glance, so he nods before taking a few steps into the room. He covers his mouth to stifle a sob when he sees his little sister with a tube down her throat and one in her nose. When he's close enough, he reaches for her hand and sits in the chair beside her, startled by the sound of the door shutting. Dean slowly enters the room, but keeps his distance.

Dean feels like the air is void of oxygen and tells himself to pull it together enough to stand by her bed. "Hey kiddo," Dean says to Y/N with a shaky breath. "God, please be okay," he says, forcing a smile as he grips onto her hand.

The two sit with Y/N for days, only leaving for bathroom trips and snack runs, but when one goes, the other stays, and when one is napping, the other is awake. Dean has grown slightly more self-composed but is still anxious as they stay by her side, even when the nurses come to deliver medications, chart vitals, or empty her catheter.

"Hey, Dean," Sam says, clearing his throat. 

"Yeah," he replies, keeping his eyes on Y/N. 

Sam looks down into his hands, "about my interview-" 

"Wait, what?" Dean says, cutting him off, "you're still gonna leave after all this?" he shouts through a clenched jaw. The chair scoots back in a screech as he quickly brings himself to his feet, "you don't wanna be here when she wakes up?" he asks, aggressively gesturing at Y/N. 

"Dean, we don't even know if she'll wake up," Sam quivers. 

"Man, you are a piece of work," Dean shouts, shaking his head. 

"If you would've let me finish," Sam growls with narrow eyes, "I was going to say that I called earlier… to reschedule it," he sighs, looking back at Y/N, "they were very understanding of the situation." 

"Oh," Dean says, turning on his heels to face away from Sam. He swipes a hand down his face, shaking his head when his eyes open to the white walls of the hospital's room. "Look, man, I'm sorry," he says, palms open and facing Sam. "This just has me on edge." 

Taking a few steps towards him, Sam holds back the urge to get nasty with Dean, telling him he's not the only one feeling 'on edge' about their sister's condition. Instead, he raises his palms and softens his face, "Me too. Believe me." 

By Thursday, Y/N had graduated from a ventilator to an oxygen mask. Though still needing the feeding tube, she's shown glimpses here and there of the Y/N they know and love, but overall, she struggles to remain conscious. The doctors are calling it a 'Minimally Conscious State' and "completely normal with this type of recovery."

On Saturday, Sam heads out for food from a local restaurant at Dean's request - something about them having good pies - but Sam has a sneaking suspicion that Dean needs some time alone with Y/N, and Sam could use the fresh air anyway.

Sitting in the chair beside her bed, Dean holds one of Y/N's hands in both of his, bringing it up to his lips and kissing the back of her hand. "I'm so sorry I failed you, Y/N," he cries. "I should have been protecting you," he whispers, letting the tears fall freely now, "but instead of doing that, I got you into this mess."

Looking up at Y/N's face, he swears he sees a tear slip down her cheek. Despite being convinced he's imagining it, he reflexively draws his hand to wipe her tear away, gasping when it comes back wet. His heart races as he gently stands to get beside her in the bed. "Shh," he coos, wrapping his arm around her.

His eyes fall shut, and he's transported back in time to the almost seven-month period where she would only fall asleep if Dean were right there in bed next to her. Through tears and voice cracks, he sings Hey Jude in a whisper, occasionally reaching over to wipe her tears away.

"I love you so much," he whispers. "I don't know how to live without you," he says, his tears turning into sobs. "Please wake up," he cries, arm wrapped tightly around her, "I promise I'll teach you how to drive if you just please wake up."

~~~~ If you liked my story, please remember to heart, comment or reblog. Or if you'd like, you can add yourself to a tag list here if you wish :) Thank you for reading!! :)

Everything Tags <3

@wayardblueshun @81mysteriouslyme @drakelover78 @soab1967 @shutupandfeedmethings @pollywantacracker666 @sonnierae26 @obsessed5sosfreak @tlovescoffee @noodledoodlebug @hobby27 @cluz1babe @emptycanvasposts @suckmyapplejacks @signrunsavestheday @flamencodiva @roseblue373

Dean <;3 @akshi8278 @squirrelnotsam @laxe-from-outer-space @ellewritesfix05 @cluz1babe @lyarr24 @mrspeacem1nusone @idksupernaturl @fandom-princess-forevermore @stoneyggirl @chaospossum @nachofriess

Sam <3 (not including the tags already above :) ) @fangirlxwritesx67 @immafangirlmess @sizekinkshawty

[certifiedwhore4slashers]

Fool

pairing: gf!wes hicks x fem!reader

summary: you were a fool to believe he was innocent and truly had died.

warnings: possessive behavior, yandere,gore, blood, murder, manipulation, faked death, parental death(not reader’s family), toxicity, obsession, etc…

It was sort of an inside joke in your friend group on how whipped Wes was for Tara, always there for her even when it was obvious she wasn’t into him.

So it didn’t surprise any of you he was the first to be at her side in the hospital. Sam of course was there.

However as killings continued, suspicions were raised. “Sam being back sort of ruins everything doesn’t it? Amber said.

You snorted.”You’re only saying that because you don’t like Sam.” “True! Chad pipes in. “Shut up, Pokémon onesie! Mindy teased.

“Well, She’s coming, Wes said.”When’s the last time Tara even saw her again?” “Five years, Amber said.”Sam’s like a troublemaker.”

“Wasn’t she like like thirteen? Amber, give her a break, You say softly. “You know who should get a break? Liv said grumpily.”Me. Vince keeps being a creep again!”

“Oh god, not Vince, You groan.”He’s such a weirdo.” You hear whistling coming in your way from the jocks. More specifically, the asshole named Landon.

“Hey sweetheart, want a ride home? He asks.

“I don’t think she wants to, Wes replied defensively. Your best friend since birth pretty much. You met him first before meeting Amber, Mindy, Liv, Chad and Tara.

“Huh, I don’t remember asking you, Landon hissed. His friends laughed at his response. “I’m sorry, I’m not interested in douchebags, You say, crossing your arms. "You playing hard to get turns me on, Landon smirks. "See you later, baby."

"Gross, You scoffed. "You okay, Buddy? Chad asks Wes. "I'm fine, He replied. Mindy smirks. "You don't seem fine." "Okay, I don't like him, so what? He hits on Y/N like all the time, He finished.

You nodded. "Hm, sounds like jealousy, Mindy jokes. "Oh come on, Mindy, we've been friends forever! You said. "Y/n is right, I'm not jealous, everyone doesn't like him, Wes defended.

He did have a very good point. Plus, jocks in general normally sucked. A few exceptions, of course, one being Chad. "I should be going, You replied." My Mom and Dad are going out so they need to lecture me on rules."

Liv chuckled. You sigh, getting up. Being by yourself wouldn't be so horrible. No, You loved being by yourself. As you expected, you were lectured on rules. However, good consequence from it. You were home alone.

You ordered pizza, since you didn't feel like cooking. You binge watched horror movies, drank some soda, since your alcohol cabinet was locked, your mom and dad knew you would drink.

truthfully, you didn't exactly mind. "Oh god, why are the blonde ones always so dumb? you scoff, judging the horror movie. You sigh, drinking your soda. "See, like, why do you even go there? obviously the killer will be there."

Your phone ringing interrupts you mid rant, making you annoyed. "hello? you say, picking up.

"Hello."

"Uh, hi, who is this? You say, curiously.

"is y/n l/n home?"

"Oh, you're speaking with her, You smile, wondering if someone you knew was calling, though, using the voice from stab, really?

"good, i really was hoping i could talk. This is Landon."

"oh my god, sorry, not interested."

"You really believed I was Landon, huh?"

You sigh of relief. "Oh, thank fucking god. Nice joke, Mindy."

“I’m not Mindy.”

“What do you mean? You say.”of course this has to be Mindy, the only one who would do a joke like that.”

“What’s your favorite scary movie?”

“Definitely not the one you’re referring to, You sigh, getting the popcorn from the microwave.”Maybe My Bloody Valentine.”

“Good one. But don’t you like the Stab Movies? Best horror franchise of all time.”

“Sorry, but it sucked, You say.”It’s disrespectful considering it’s based on real events.”

“But you’re watching it right now. Hypocritical of you.”

Your eyes widen, you were. Not because you well, liked the movies, but because you would want to judge them over and over. It was something you did with movies you sucked.

“How did you know that? You say, looking out the windows.

“I’m watching you right now.”

You pause the movie and check everywhere the creepy phone caller was.

“Well, where are you?”

“Right behind you.”

You didn’t want to look behind you, but did as Ghostface grabbed your throat, throwing you onto the table, your snacks spilling over. Everything on the ground.

You whimpered a little as your oxygen began running out, coughing and struggling to get some air. You squirm.

“Don’t move.”

You nodded, and stop moving. He lets go of your throat, so that wasn’t how he’d kill you. You ask, "Could you just kill me by now?"

"Now would that be fun?"

You sigh, closing your eyes, preparing for your death, seeing it now. Only pain. You groaned feeling yourself being stabbed. "No! Please! You cry out. You were in so much pain.

However, he stabbed you a few times more. You still lived, though. Blacking out, accepting your fate. But you woke up, surrounded by your friends.

"y/n! you woke up! Tara said. "Huh? You say, weakly. "Um, how do we say this? She finished. Amber sighed. "Wes and his Mom died." You see Sam and someone you don’t recognize.

"hi, i'm richie, he says awkwardly.”I’m sorry for your loss.” “Thank you, You replied. You couldn’t believe your best friend died.

Your head hurt, badly. You hit your head hard you assumed. “Oh god, You groaned, tears coming out from the fact your best friend was gone.

“Hey, it’s going to be okay, Sam assured you. "i know, you frowned. You couldn't even imagine how he died. You felt horrible, you shouldn't have lived.

Amber seemed sympathetic but glared daggers at Sam. She didn’t like her. And made it fairly obvious. “I still am in so much pain, You groan.

“Maybe you need some sleep, Chad suggested. You nodded, deciding that’s what you really wanted. Some rest.

After a few hours you got some rest. You wanted to leave but you still had to recover, unfortunately. And by now you were by yourself.

Vulnerable.

At least you were filled with people around you. So not completely alone. You were bored, but having your phone, you would be fine. Something took you by surprise.

Wes had messaged you.

Or at least someone was using his phone to message you, taunt you. This was sick. But you couldn’t help but read the message.

It hurts doesn’t it?

This was confusing for a second, then you remembered he meant Wes.

Fuck you.

You were on read and didn’t get a response. Not for a while anyway. And you ignored further messages from Ghostface.

You eventually recovered enough to be discharged. And apparently the decision was to go to Stu Macher’s house. Why? You had no idea but went along because at least you wouldn’t be by yourself.

You sat on the living room couch, your friends with you. “I’m getting Deja vu, Mindy said. “You weren’t even born when Randy was here! You point out.

Liv and Chad sat together, though showing a bit more PDA than you can handle. “Whatever, you sigh. “Hey look, y/n, I get it, you’re grieving, Mindy said.

“I think I might just drink something, You frown, getting up and going to the kitchen. Opening the fridge, you hear something weird.

“Chad? Sam? You say, hoping it was at least one of them. But it wasn’t. Standing in front of you was Ghostface.

“Holy shit! Guys! You yell, as Ghostface lunges for you. “Y/n, what’s going on… FUCK! Chad said. Liv was nowhere to be seen.

“Look I have to find Liv, He said.”She accepted my request and-“ “okay! But it might be a trap! You say, Ghostface grabbing you from behind, scaring you as you screamed, violently kicking to get out of his grasp.

You should’ve seen this coming. But you didn’t. “Hey, asshole! Sam said, making Ghostface turn in her direction, hitting him and you getting out of his grasp.

It didn’t surprise you that there was another one. Richie seemed totally freaked out, and so were you. “I’ve seen this in like a million Stab movies! He said.

You had known that he hadn’t seen them prior, and watched them while supporting Sam. “Okay, but those movies sucked and aren’t accurate! You said.”So the most logical thing to do apparently was just run around and hope the killer doesn’t find you.

Nice.

You were already exhausted but nonetheless made sure you stuck by your friends. You didn’t trust Amber, and you hadn’t seen her so it was quite obviously her as Ghostface.

“Okay, it’s either Amber or Liv, I think it’s Amber though, You murmur. Tara would’ve been very offended if she had heard that.

When all of a sudden, Ghostface lunges out. And Sidney arrived. Out of everyone she pretty much knew how to deal with Ghostface the best.

“Run! Sidney said. You ran into Amber. Then apparently Liv, who was covered in blood. “Liv, what the fuck? You say.

“I found Chad! She sobbed. “We know it’s you! Amber yelled.”Stop trying to make yourself look innocent!” “Stay back, Sam said. Richie somehow appeared again.

That made you very suspicious. “Richie, maybe stay the fuck back yourself, You snap. “What did I do? He asks.

“The love interest is always a suspect, I said. “Calm down, Y/N, Sam said. Defending her boyfriend as usual. But everyone else, it seemed clear Richie was suspicious.

Gale had been knocked out and Sidney stood by you and your friends. “I swear I’m not the killer! Liv said.”Chad’s dead.”

Amber went from scared to smug.”I know.” She pulled out a gun, and shot Liv point blank, killing her. Everyone scrambled but Richie, who stuck behind, revealed to be the second killer.

“Ah ah, I wouldn’t move if I were you, Richie said to Sam, knife pressed on her throat, putting the voice changer on.”Surprise, Sam.”

Everyone steps into the kitchen, Amber cornering Sidney. “But that’s not even the best part! Amber said proudly, sticking by her older boyfriend, making you want to vomit.

She was fucking psychotic. But at the same time, Amber definitely was a victim in the sense she was groomed by Richie, but they both seemed fucked in the head.

A third Ghostface appeared. And that feeling appeared again. That dreadful feeling. Your intuition. Amber specifically looks at you. And that’s when you knew.

“Surprise, Y/N.”

Wes has a sick grin on his face, the mask off and his hand. “You killed your own mother? You ask, Jaw dropped.

“It wasn’t too hard, and besides, she was being a bitch, it had to be done, Wes said. He’d never call his mother that. He loved his Mom. It was sweet and, he was respectful.

This wasn’t the person you had grown up with and knew. This was a completely different person. “Don’t, Sam said.”Don’t let him get close, y/n.”

“I know.”

You wanted to, You so badly wanted to. But that wasn’t what you were going to do. You grabbed a kitchen knife, and when you really thought about it, you needed to kill him.

“Go on, do it, Wes smirked.”Kill me.” Amber and Richie only stood there like idiots but seemed proud. You put more thought into this. You needed to be logical.

It was clear that he was going off an obsession. Some fucked up feelings he had for you. But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t kill you.

You were going to kill him, but not first. Instead, you plunged the knife straight into Amber, as she screamed out in pain.

“You’re next, you should run, Ghostface.”

You were such a fool.

[animesmolbean]

Words Hold Power 

An “The Umbrella Academy” fanfiction

Five x Reader

(Male)

Author's Note: Welcome to my The Umbrella Academy fanfiction! I'm so excited to share this story with you all! TUA is my favorite Netflix show! I'm very sad to see it's in its final season, but all great shows come to an end! But at least we'll get to rewatch it over and over again, lol.

Speaking of which, please, no spoilers for S4 since I have not watched it yet. I'll let you guys know where I am in S4 in coming posts.

With that said, I just wanted to tell you guys this. There was one hesitation I had with writing this story. Handling Viktor's character. I know about the journey of this character and Elliot Page's journey as well. I know about the transition, and I wanted to tell you how I planned on approaching this.

I did research on this topic and wanted to be sure I was handling it correctly. I researched how I should write transgender characters and their journeys throughout the story.

I also read other TUA fanfictions for research to see how other authors handle it, and like the research, it's a mixed bag. Some use Viktor only, and some show the name change.

After researching, I decided on an approach.

I will follow what the show does and show the transition story Viktor has. I chose this because I believe it's a beautiful journey, and the show does a great job handling the topic.

One last thing, all the main characters (The Hargreeves siblings) are aged up a little.

With all that said, I hope you enjoy the first chapter! ♥️

~Character Info~

Reader's ability is cursed speech.  She can make anyone do what she says with only a few words.  It's similar to Allison's, except she doesn't need to say certain words first like her, and her ability is much more powerful.  To the point where she has to be extremely careful about what she says.  

(As you can tell, this was inspired by the anime character, Toge Inumaki from Jujutsu Kaisen.)

Chapter 1: We Only See Each Other at Weddings and Funerals (Family Reunion)

On the twelfth hour of the first day of October 1985, forty-three women around the world gave birth.  

This was unusual only in the fact that none of these women have been pregnant when the day first began.

Sir Reginald Hargreeves, eccentric billionaire and adventurer, resolved to locate and adopt as many of the children as possible.

He got eight of them. 

Many years later, the kids grew up and went on with their lives as adults.  

There was Number One, aka Luther Hargreeves.  Big, strong and was currently on the moon, studying and preparing for whatever his mission was.  

There was Number Two, aka Diego Hargreeves.  Impulsive, brave and works as a vigilante of sorts.  

There was Number Three, aka Allison Hargreeves.  Famous actress who was currently on the red carpet in front of paparazzi.  

There was Number Four, aka Klaus.  A lazy, free-spirited soul who is currently leaving rehab and using the money he got from the rehab to buy drugs.  He ended up in the back of an ambulance.  

And, there was Number Seven, aka Vanya Hargreeves.  She was quiet, timid and was currently leaving the theater after practicing her violin.  

However, their lives would change forever with one broadcast.  

Their father was now dead. 

THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY 

☂

Vanya rode a taxi to her childhood home.  A place she lived for many years.  

The Umbrella Academy.  

A tall condo-like building with a black gate.  

Vanya approached the building and opened the doors, whose windows were decorated by umbrellas.  

The foyer was fancy still.  The middle was open with a chandelier hanging above a small round table in the middle.  Tall, smooth white beams holding the sides which held the second floor.  A staircase that leads to that second floor was behind the small round table.  

It was just as Vayna remembered it.  Every little detail was still there.  

“Hey, Mom.” 

Vanya called to the woman in the living room.  Said woman sat on the sofa in front of the fireplace which currently had a fire going.  She stayed still as she stared into the dancing flames.  

“Mom?”

“Vanya?” 

A familiar voice turned Vanya’s attention elsewhere.  

“You're actually here.” 

She turned and saw her sister, Allison coming down the stairs.  

“Hey, Allison.” 

“Hey sis.” 

Allison now stood before her sister.  She chuckled and brought the other girl into a hug, which Vanya quietly but graciously returned.  

“Ah.  What is she doing here?” 

A new voice spoke through the quiet foyer.

“You don't belong here.  Not after what you did.”

It was Diego.

“You're seriously gonna do this today?” Allison spoke up, her tone telling that she wasn't in the mood for the male's attitude. 

“Way to dress for the occasion, by the way.” She added, mocking Diego’s attire as he ascended the stairs.  He was still in his “hero” gear; knives and everything.

“At least I'm wearing black.” Diego shot back nonchalantly as he turned left on the stairs, disappearing from the girls’ views.  

Vanya, now uncomfortable, spoke up quietly, “You know what?  I- Maybe he's right.  And I shouldn't-”

“Forget about him.” Allison interrupted her.  “I'm glad you're here.” She spoke softly.  Vanya’s lips quirked up a little at Allison's words.  The sisters shared a moment of silence.  

☂

Diego arrived at his late father's room, to see Luther there checking the windows.  He leaned against the doorframe.  

“I can save you some time.  They're all locked.  No forced entry, no sign of struggle.  Nothing out of the ordinary.” 

As he spoke, he walked over to Luther who was also walking towards him.  

“Oh, you got big, Luther.  What's the secret, huh?  Protein shakes?  Low carbs?” Diego asked mockingly.  

“What do you want?”  Luther asked, not wanting to deal with Diego's attitude.  

Diego reached into his pocket and pulled out a few folded pieces of paper, handing them to Luther.  “The autopsy report.” 

After he teasingly tried to pull them away from Luther, the latter brother snatched them out of his hand.  

“And you have this, why?” Luther asked. 

“Well, that's because I… broke into the coroner's office.” Diego explained as he sat down in an armchair.  “And surprise, surprise, Dad's death was… normal.  Just a boring, old heart failure.”

“Yeah, so?” Luther looked at Diego.  

“So, why are you in here, checking all the windows?”

“Were you the first one on the scene?” Luther asked.

“Pogo found him.” Diego answered. 

“Yeah, I talked with Pogo.  He said he couldn't find Dad's monocle.”

“And your point being?” Diego asked in a bored tone.

“Can you think of a single time you saw Dad, and he wasn't wearing that monocle?  No.  Which means someone took it.  Which means there's a chance he wasn't alone when he died.”

Diego sat up from the armchair.  “There is no mystery here.  Nothing to avenge.  Nothing to solve, nothing like that.  It's just a sad old man who kicked it in a big empty house.  Just like he deserved.” 

“You should leave.” Lither spoke, not liking Diego's tone with that last sentence he spoke.  

“Whatever you say, brother.” Diego said in a mocking tone as he turned to leave.  Before he did, he turned back to Luther.  “By the way, did you visit (Your Name) yet?” 

Luther shook his head.  “No.  I was about to, actually.” 

“You know where he is.” Diego simply said.

☂

Vanya entered the living room, looking around at the interior.  She spotted a comic and new articles on their group, The Umbrella Academy.  She looked at the bookshelves and pulled out one book in particular.  

The title read, “Extra Ordinary My Life as Number Seven” 

It was her autobiography book.  The one she wrote when she left the academy. 

She observed it solemnly, until a voice spoke out.

“Welcome home, Ms. Vanya.” 

She turned and saw Pogo, a human sized monkey dressed formally with a cane and glasses.  

Vanya walked over to him and hugged him.  Pogo hugged back with a hum.  “So good to see you.” He noticed the book in her hand.  “Ah, yes, your autobiography.” 

“Do you know, um…” Vanya paused before continuing.  “Did he ever read it?” 

Pogo thought for a moment before replying, “Not that I'm aware of.” 

Vanya turned her attention to the portrait above the fireplace.  It showed a boy, around seventeen in age, sitting with a neutral but sophisticated look on his face.  

“How long has it been since Five disappeared?” She asked.

Pogo turned to look at the portrait too.  “It's been sixteen years, four months, and fourteen days.” The two looked at each other.  “Your father insisted I keep track.” 

“And… how long has (Your Name) been in that coma?” 

“Sixteen years, four months, and six days.” Pogo replied.  

“You wanna know something stupid?  I always used to leave the lights on for him.  I was scared that he would come back, it would be late, and the house would be dark and he wouldn't be able to find us, so he'd leave again.  And he would take (Your Name) with him.  So, every night, I'd make a little snack and make sure all the lights were on.” 

Pogo nodded.  “Oh, I remember your snacks.  I'm pretty sure I stepped in half those peanut butter and marshmallow sandwiches, and those (Favorite type of Cookie) cookies.”  He sighed a couple times before he spoke again, “Your father always believed that Number Five was still out there somewhere.  He also believed that one day (Your Name) would wake up.  He never lost hope.” 

“And look where that got him.” Vanya said solemnly. 

☂

Allison went up to her late father's study, looking around the area.  The familiarity of it brought up a memory.  

〰️

Reginald Hargreeves was working in his office, as usual, when Grace knocked on the door.  She entered before closing the door.

“The children are ready for bed, sir.  They wanted to say goodnight.” 

She turned and walked a couple of paces and opened the sliding door.  

On the other side revealed the eight children, all wearing matching pajamas.  Allison was in the center while the others surrounded her.  Little (Your Name) stood between her and Five, a black cloth face mask covering his mouth and nose.  

The children were all smiling as they waited for their father to acknowledge them.  But he was so into his work that he didn't even glance up at them.  

Sensing the awkwardness, Grace quickly dismissed the kids.  The kids, of course, were disappointed but not surprised.  As they left slowly, (Your Name) tugged on Allison's sleeve, silently asking her to come.  

“I'll be there in a minute (Your Name).” The girl whispered.  (Your Name) tilted his head to the side.  Allison spoke again, “Why don't you go hang out with Five for a bit before bed?  I know you planned on it.” She gave the masked boy a small smile.  (Your Name) felt his cheeks warm up, but he nodded, leaving and quietly walking over to Five.  The boy saw him coming and, with a nod of his head, gestured to him to follow him.  (Your Name) nodded and started to walk beside him.  As he did, he heard Allison, 

“He's always busy.” 

〰️

“Where's the cash, Dad?” 

The sound of a voice diverted Allison's attention and she walked over to her father's desk, hearing clamoring noises.  She leaned forward to look to see who was over there.  

“Klaus?  What are you doing in here?” She asked.  

Said boy looked up and gasped at the sight of his sister.  “Oh!  Allison!  Wow, is that you?” He asked as he stood up.  He embraced her slowly; Allison slowly returned the hug.  “Long time.  Too long.” He pulled away.  “Hey, I was hoping to see you, actually, because I wanted to get your autograph.  Add it to my collection!” He planted his chin onto his hands.  

Allison let her brother act because it was how he always behaved when she noticed the white paper bracelet on his left wrist.  “Just out of rehab?” She asked.

“No, no.  No, no, no, no.  No.  I'm done with all of that.” Klaus replied with a sigh as he removed the bracelet. “I just came down here to prove to myself that the old man was really gone.” He smiled.  “And he is!  He's dead.  Yeah!” He clapped, making Allison smile a little, shaking her head a bit.  

“You know how I know?  Because if he were alive, not one of us would be allowed to set foot in this room.” Allison silently agreed with Klaus.  

“He was always in here, our whole childhood, plotting his next torment, right?” He said with a chuckle as he sat in the armchair behind the desk, putting his feet on the desk.  “Remember how he used to look at us?  That scowl?” He pointed to the man's portrait onto the wall behind him.  “Thank Christ, he's not our real father, so we couldn't inherit those cold, dead eyes!” He stretched his eyelids to show more of his eyeballs.  He fake screams, making Allison chuckle a little as Klaus started to dramatically imitate their late father. 

“Get out of his chair.” 

Klaus turned his head and saw Luther standing by the doorway.  “Oh, wow, Luther!  Wow, you really, uh… You really filled out over the years huh?” Klaus said as he stood and flexed his arm muscles.  

“Klaus.” Luther warned.

“Save the lecture.  I was already leaving.  You guys can talk amongst yourselves.  I am going to visit (Your Name).  Oh!  The precious little brother of ours.” He chuckled softly.  Before he could leave though, Luther stopped him.  “Drop it.”

“Ex-squeeze me?” Klaus said.

“Do it.  Now.” Luther ordered.  

Klaus pulled his arm away from Luther and went back to the desk and started to empty out his pockets, which held a few of his late father's belongings.  “It's just an advance on our inheritance!  That's all it is!” Allison chuckled silently at her brother.  “No need to get your little panties in a bunch.” With that, Klaus left, closing the door; leaving Luther and Allison alone in the room. 

“So, Klaus is still Klaus, in case you are wondering.” Luther started.

“You know, after all these years, I find it strangely comforting.” Allison stated.

“Did you see Diego?” Luther asked.

“With his stupid outfit?” Allison added in amusement. 

“Oh, I know.  Do you think he wears that thing in the bathroom?” Lauther asked.

“Like in the shower?” Allison asked for confirmation. 

“Yeah.” Luther confirmed.

“Yes, absolutely!” Allison laughed.  

The two went on to talk about how their lives are going now that they are adults.  Luther was the only one to stay while the rest went their separate ways.  Their conversation ended talking about Allison's family and her powers.  

〰️

A little later, everyone congregated in the living room.  The fire was still going in the fireplace as everyone sat in silence.  

Luther started talking about doing a memorial service for their late father.  Some like Allison were mostly confused by this, or making fun of it like Klaus.  

“Is that my skirt?” Allison asked, noticing Klaus wearing a skirt now.  

“Oh, yeah this.  I found it in your room.  It's a little dated, I know, but it's very breathy on the bits.”

Luther stopped Klaus before he could go further and started to talk about their father's death.  He had a theory that he didn't die simply of heart failure.  He recounted how he was acting suspicious and requested Klaus to try to communicate with him.  Klaus was not interested.  

“I can't just call Dad into the afterlife and be like, “Dad, could you just stop playing tennis with Hitler for a moment and take a quick call?” 

“Since when?  That's your thing.” Luther said.

“I'm not in the right… frame of mind.” 

“You're high?” Allison asked, not surprised.

“Yeah!  Yeah!” Klaus laughed.  “I mean, how are you not listening to this nonsense?” 

“Well, sober up, this is important.” Luther said.

Klaus only sighed.  

When Luther started talking about the missing monocle, Diego concluded that Luther was suspicious of all of them, saying that Luther thought one of them killed their dad.  This caused everyone to get upset.  Diego insulted Luther's leadership, Klaus got up and jokingly said that he might as well go murder their Mom and (Your Name), unless he was already dead.  Vanya left in silence and. Allison left in silence as well.  Luther tried to defend himself, but it was too late.  

They weren't always like this.  When they were kids, they were tight knit.  

〰️

17 YEARS AGO

“This is Jim Hellerman, reporting live for Channel 2 News outside of the Capital West Bank at Main and Sixth.  A group of heavily armed men stormed the bank not three hours ago and took an unknown number of hostages.” 

The armed men surveyed the bank as they pointed their guns at the bound up hostages and pushed them behind the counter as they proceeded with the robbery.  

Unexpectedly, a girl with curly black hair, in a school uniform and mask, walked casually to one of the robbers.  

It was Allison. 

“Hey, get back with the others.” The robber ordered the girl.  

“I heard a rumor.” Allison spoke. 

“What?  What did you say?” 

Allison leaned forward and used her ability, “I heard a rumor that you shot your friend in the foot.” 

The robber pointed his gun at one of his partners and promptly shot him in the foot, knocking him down.  The hostages screamed at the sound of the gun.  

Suddenly, someone dressed in a boy's school uniform with a mask came crashing down from a window above and landed behind the counter.  It was Luther.  He punched one robber and threw him out the window with surprising strength.  

Then, another kid dressed like Luther came from the other side of the bank.  “Guns are for sissies.  Real men throw knives.” He threw two long knives at one of the robbers only for them to redirect to another robber and immediately killed him. 

There were now only two robbers left in the lobby.  

One of them climbed onto the desk and pointed his gun shakily at the three kids.  “Get back, you freaks.” 

“Hey, be careful up there, buddy.” Diego, the knife throwing kid taunted.

“Get back now!” 

“Wouldn't want you to get hurt.” Allison taunted as well.

“Or what?” 

A fourth kid appeared seemingly out of nowhere, sitting criss cross on the desk.  A taunting smirk on his face.  This was Number Five.  

The robber shot at Five, but he disappeared and reappeared on the other side.  When the robber turned around and tried to shoot him again, he suddenly realized that he was not holding a gun.

“Ooh!  That's one badass stapler!” Five taunted before smacking the guy's hand holding the stapler into his head.  This knocked the robber over.  

All they had to do now was get rid of the robbers in the vault.  

Or so they thought.  

There was one more.  

He loaded his gun and his gun cocked, catching the kids off guard.  

“Down you freaks!” He yelled.  

Suddenly, running from a hidden place behind a wall, was a fifth kid, dressed like the rest of the boys, as he pulled down his face mask.  He directed his attention to the robber.  

“Explode!” 

The single word echoed loudly through the bank, and just before the guy could turn his gun to the boy, his body suddenly exploded, body parts, guts, and blood spreading out everywhere.  The hostages screamed in fear.  The boy quickly covered his face again, breathing heavily as he ran to his siblings.  

He gestured to all of them.  They couldn't see much of his face, but they could tell he was worried by the look in his eyes.  

“We're okay.  Thanks (Your Name).” Allison said.

(Your Name) hummed, nodding as he walked over to behind the desk with the others, while two more kids dressed like the rest of the boys joined them.  Five looked at him.  “That was pretty badass.  Good work.” He complimented, giving him a smile.  (Your Name) felt his cheeks warm up a little, and he tilted his head a bit and closed his eyes.  Most people wouldn't be able to tell his expression behind the mask, but Five knew he was smiling at him in thanks.  

“Do we really have to do this?” A meek voice asked. 

“Come on, Ben.  There's more guys in the vault.” Luther told the boy.

Ben sighed as he walked to the vault door.  “I didn't sign up for this.” 

He entered as the hostages all ran for their lives out of the bank.  Inside the vault, the last of the robbers were eyeing slaughtered by Ben's ability.  He screeched and roared as his tentacles ripped them apart and threw them against the walls.  Blood splattered all over the windows.  

Once it was quiet, Ben came out, covered in blood.  “Can we go home now?” He asked, his breathing shaky.  

It was time to leave.  

The seven kids started walking towards the entrance of the bank. (Your Name) pulled out a small vial and turned the cap.  He pulled the bottom part of his mask up and put the bottle to his lips.  He tilted his head back and started swallowing the liquid.  He finished it and placed the empty bottle back in his pocket.  

“Are you feeling okay?” 

Five's voice made (Your Name) turn to him.  He nodded and hummed in thanks.  Five offered his arm to him.  “Ready?” He asked.  The boy nodded again, and he hooked his arm with Five's.  Five smiled at him, and they started walking after their siblings.  

The seven kids emerged from the back as the news reporters pointed their cameras at the group, and they all clamored to try to talk to them.  

Above on the top of a building nearby, stood Reginald Hargreeves, observing the other kids with a mini telescope. An eighth kid, dressed like Allison, stood next to him.

“Why can't I go play with the others?” The girl asked.  

“We've been through this before, Number Seven.  I'm afraid there's just nothing special about you.” Reginald said as he lowered his telescope.  

The girl looked down.  “Oh.”

Eventually, Reginald came down to stand with the children.  

“Our world is changing.  Has changed.  There are some among us gifted with abilities far beyond the ordinary.  I have adopted seven such children.” 

‘You mean eight.’ (Your Name) thought to himself as he looked down temporarily, his arm still linked with Five's.  

“I give you the inaugural class of the Umbrella Academy.” 

Many news reporters asked many questions.

“What happened to their parents?” One asked.

“They were suitably compensated.” Reginald replied.  

“Are you concerned about the welfare of the children?” Another asked.  

“Of course.  As I am for the fate of the world.” Reginald said.  

〰️

☂

Everyone was in separate rooms, having their alone time after the little dispute from earlier.  Klaus was still in the living room, trying to talk to their late father, but he ended up knocking the vase filled with his ashes over.  

Luther was walking through the hallways, reminiscing until he got to his room.  

Allison was looking through her belongings until she found a gold heart locket with ‘A+L’ carved onto the front.  

Klaus took the vase into the kitchen where he proceeded to take more pills.  

Diego laid on the couch in the living room, playing with one of his knives.

Vanya sat on the stairs, a solemn look on her face.

Luther eventually found a familiar record and played it on the record player.  

“I Think We're Alone Now” by Tiffany started to play.  

Everyone heard the familiar tune all throughout the house and they all started to dance in their respective rooms.  

Childhood nostalgia ran through their bodies as they all danced like no one was watching.  Even Pogo moved a little to the beat.  

But suddenly, thunder rumbled and lightning flashed.  

The music stopped as the house reacted to the violent disturbance.  

The siblings all ran to the courtyard and saw a giant hole, surrounded by blue lightning.  

“What is it?” Vanya asked.

“Don't get too close!” Allison warned.  

“Yeah, no shit.” Diego said.

“Looks like some sort of temporal anomaly.  Either that or a miniature black hole.  One of the two. 

“Pretty big difference there, Paul Bunyan.” Diego insulted.

“Out of the way!” Klaus exclaimed as he came out with a fire extinguisher and tried to spray it but it was out of steam.  So, he just threw it at the mysterious anomaly only for it to get sucked in.  

“What is that gonna do?” Allison asked.

“I don't know.  Do you have a better idea?” Klaus asked.  

The anomaly got stronger and Luther ushered everyone behind him to protect them.  Klaus wanted to run.  Luther and Allison held hands.  

The electrical crackling intensified and someone emerged from the anomaly, arms out.  It disappeared and the person fell out of the sky and landed on the ground.  The sky cleared up as the siblings walked towards the person, who stood up.  He was dressed in a suit way too big for him. 

“Does anyone else see little Number Five, or is that just me?” Klaus asked. 

The boy known as Five looked at himself then back at the siblings.  

“Shit.” 

☂

The six were now in the kitchen.  Five was busy making a sandwich while the others watched in shock.  

“What's the date?  The exact date.” Five asked.  

“The 24th.” Vanya replied. 

“Of what?”

“March.” 

“Good.” 

Luther spoke up.  “So, are we gonna talk about what just happened?” 

Five didn't reply.  He just continued with making his sandwich.  

Silence fell for a couple seconds until Luther stood up.  “It's been seventeen years.” 

Five scoffed.  “It's been a lot longer than that.” He blinked over to the cabinet. 

“I haven't missed that.” Luther muttered.  

“Where'd you go?” Diego asked.

“The future.  It's shit, by the way.” Five replied as he blinked back to the table.  

“Called it.” Klaus said.  

“I should've listened to the old man.  You know, jumping through space is one thing, jumping through time is a toss of the dice.” Five looked up at the siblings.  “Nice dress.” He told Klaus. 

“Oh, well, danke!” Klaus said, playing with the article of clothing.  

“Wait, how did you get back?” Vanya asked.

“In the end I had to project my consciousness forward into a suspended quantum state version of myself that exists across every possible instance of time.” Five explained.  

“That makes no sense.” Diego spoke up.

“Well, it would if you were smarter.” Five sasses.

Diego stood up to confront the boy, but Luther stopped him, holding him back.

“How long were you there?” He asked.

“Forty-one years.  Give or take.” 

Luther and Diego sat back down.  “So what are you saying?  That you're fifty-eight?” The former asked.

Five looked at Luther.  “No, my consciousness is fifty-eight.” He finished his sandwich.  “Apparently, my body is now seventeen again.” 

“Wait, how does that even work?” Vanya asked.

“Delores kept saying the equations were off.  Eh.” Five took a bite out of his sandwich.  “Bet she's laughing now.” 

Vanya was confused.  “Delores?” 

Five ignored her and looked at the newspaper that told him about Reginald Hargreeves’ death.  “Guess I missed the funeral.”

“How'd you know about that?” Luther asked.

“What part of the future do you not understand?” Five asked.  “Heart failure, huh?” 

“Yeah.” “No.” Diego and Luther said together.

Five hummed before clicking his tongue.  “Nice to see nothing's changed.”  Then, he got a good look at his siblings again.  He realized that one was missing.  “By the way, where's (Your Name)?”

The other five siblings looked at each other, solemn expressions on their faces now.  “Well…” Vanya started.  “There isn't an easy way to say this.” Allison said.  “He's in a coma.” “He's dead.” Klaus and Diego finished.  “Diego!” Allison scolded. 

Five looked at his siblings, a subtle look of worry on his face, but on the inside, his heart was beating faster.  “What happened?” 

“Well…. like I said… this isn't easy to say.” As Allison tried to explain, they suddenly heard soft footsteps approaching the kitchen.  They slowly turned their heads and what they saw shook them to the core. 

There stood…

(Your Name).

Klaus yelled in surprise.  

“Holy shit.” Diego said. 

Everyone else looked in surprise.  

(Your Name) was alive.

[flanaganfilm]

Hey Mike! First off, it makes me so happy to see you out there fighting with your writer friends to ensure they receive a decent living wage for the amazing work that they do.

As for my question, I would love to hear about some of the inspiration for making Before I Wake. It and Absentia were the last two of your films that I watched, and BIW just absolutely destroyed me. No other movie, including and especially a horror flick, has ever made me bawl like a baby like that. The entire tone of the film is so spot-on, and the climax of the nightmare monster “dissolving” from its evil form after being embraced…. To me that scene just perfectly encapsulates what it’s like to be a parent, and human; sometimes we just need someone to hold us and let us know things will be all right. We spend so much of our time making sure that our children feel loved and cared for, that sometimes we forget about ourselves. And you just fucking nailed it, my dude.

Like I said, I would LOVE to read any backstory or inspiration that you have for this film! It’s so beautiful and underrated.

On the WGA front, don't be too impressed with me - I mean, I'm a professional writer, I've been a member of the WGA since Absentia, so I'm out there fighting for myself as much as everyone else.

But on the Before I Wake front, you know I very rarely get asked to talk about this one, so I'm happy to... fair warning for another long post!

Before I Wake was originally titled Somnia, which is latin for "dreams." It was part of an unofficial trilogy of sorts, comprised of Absentia, Oculus and Somnia. All three of those movies were meant to work together as a thematic triptych.

Ultimately, Before I Wake was brutally sabotaged by its own studio, who drastically undermined it creatively and then destroyed any hope of a meaningful release. It remains a particularly heartbreaking chapter of my career... but a film I have and will always have tremendous affection for.

A lot of people think that Somnia was made after Hush and Ouija: Origin of Evil, just before Gerald's Game, but this is entirely incorrect. It was actually the second "real" movie I ever made, and was actually shot before Oculus was even released.

The basic premise of Somnia focused around a little boy whose dreams manifested physically in the world around him, and was an original concept I carried around for a few years before Oculus got picked up by Intrepid Pictures. In fact, I've talked about my first meeting at Intrepid, where I pitched a few ideas that were rejected... Somnia was the first one I pitched. Trevor Macy opted to pursue Oculus that day, but he ended up producing Somnia right after.

This unofficial "latin trilogy" seemed to fit together well. Absentia was a somber and bleak look at the loss of hope, Oculus was more thrilling dive into the labyrinth of past trauma, and Somnia was meant to take that loss and trauma and end the triptych on a note of hope and healing.

In fact, the script for Somnia was written before Oculus was greenlit. On the page, it was my favorite of the three. I was very taken with the story of little Cody and his personal boogeyman, and of the revelation at the end of the story... that with understanding, even the most monstrous of our fears can lose their destructive power.

Cody's birth mother had died of cancer, and he had seen her just before her death. That final image of her, as well as a misunderstanding about the pronunciation of the word "cancer" had led to the creation of a monster in his mind, who he called the "Canker Man"... a gaunt figure who took away people that he loved. When he finally learns the truth about his monster, and about his mother, he begins to understand it all... and the monster loses its awful powers as empathy and understanding take root.

While Absentia finished its festival rounds and Oculus inched its way toward production, Somnia was my first script taken out to market by my new agency. I had signed with APA just as Intrepid engaged me on Oculus, which was my first studio writing and directing job. Jeff Howard and I finished our first draft of Oculus and turned it in to Intrepid, and immediately turned around and started writing Somnia.

The script got some interesting attention. While some of the more mainstream horror companies balked at the emotional ending and preferred a story that was "more about a boy and his monster" than the emotional wrap-up we insisted on, others understood it right away.

Elijah Wood and his producing partner Daniel Noah sought me out when they read the script. We met for drinks in Venice and I was absolutely starstruck, and we've remained friends ever since.

Jada Pinkett Smith was another big fan of the script, which led to a surreal afternoon at her stunning home where we talked about the story at length and watched an early cut of Oculus in her home theater. Will Smith joined us toward the end of the meeting, and I had a difficult time speaking.

I've written before about the drama surrounding Oculus' premiere and eventual sale to Relativity Media, so I won't rehash that now, but as Oculus raced toward release, Trevor Macy at Intrepid made an offer to produce Somnia for Relativity and I eagerly accepted. My first "real" movie was going to be released wide in theaters, and the same studio was going to double-down on me - Somnia was greenlit by Relativity for a big domestic theatrical release. We'd pre-sell our foreign territories on this promise, and they eagerly snatched the movie up. This was my own Hollywood dream, coming to life.

It wouldn't work out that way. In fact, Somnia would turn out to be the first nightmare of my career.

It started well enough. We had filmed Oculus in Daphne, Alabama, taking advantage of an aggressive tax rebate. We would do the same with Somnia, bringing back a lot of my Oculus crew and shooting in and around Fairhope. We began shooting in the fall of 2013, less than a year after we'd wrapped Oculus.

We hit the ground running. Very little time had passed since we wrapped Oculus, and the movie hadn't come out yet, so at first it felt a lot like we were just picking up where we left off.

Bruce Larsen, who also carved the Oculus mirror, working on a prototype of the Canker Man.

We had casting challenges. I was still a relatively unproven director, my first studio film hadn't been released, and this was an ambitious script. After a lengthy search (driven by foreign pre-sales, a process I knew nothing about and now quite detest), Kate Bosworth signed on to play Jessie, and Thomas Jane - who I admired greatly from his recent work in The Mist - joined the production as Mark. (Funny story - Tom arrived with hair down his shoulders, and vehemently didn't want to cut it. That disagreement put us off on an awkward foot, and I ultimately conceded the point to him... though I do regret that now.)

The major discovery was 7 year-old Jacob Tremblay as Cody. Jake had only made one movie before this, he had a small role in The Smurfs 2. His self-tape audition came out of nowhere and we knew was a a phenomenal talent. Right after we wrapped, I got a call that he was being considered for a movie called Room, and we shared some footage to help him get the part (that movie would establish him as one of the biggest and most sought after child actors in the world... but we had him first.)

We were committed to practical effects wherever possible, and creating a striking suit for our monster. It all felt like it was going to work. But the shoot would prove to be much more challenging than we anticipated.

The shoot itself was challenging for the typical reasons. There was a little creative tension on set with particular actors, we didn't have enough money to pull off our more ambitious visual moments, and we were forced to remove several production days at the last minute, throwing our schedule into a bit of chaos.

But none of these issues were particularly unusual for a lower budget film, and while it was more challenging and frustrating than Oculus had been, overall the shoot was just fine. I felt that our third act was pretty drastically under budgeted, and what was scripted to be a deep dive into a child's imagination was stripped down to a few vines on the walls and some moths... but other than that, I don't really have much to complain about.

(Fun fact: it was also the first time I would work with Annabeth Gish. We were fast friends, and though she was only with us for a few days, I knew we'd end up working together again.)

We wrapped the movie, I got to editing, and all seemed fine. It was a unique story, much less horror-centric and much more of a fairy-tale. This was, of course, by design. There was a delicate vibe to the whole thing, anchored on Jacob's arresting performance, and a shadowy magic. It felt innocent, wondrous, and ultimately cathartic.

Then, Relativity got their first look at the cut, and the problems started in earnest.

We had been clear (and aligned, I'd thought) about what kind of movie this was. But almost immediately, despite these conversations, the studio began to push the film more and more toward being a traditional horror movie.

We had designed a practical monster in the Canker Man. Our creature was tactile, practical, and - we believed - appropriately simple. After all, it was meant to have come from the mind of a child.

The studio kicked hard, and the directive came down to try to make the monster "much scarier."

There wasn't a lot we could do; we'd shot what we'd shot, after all. The decision was made to take our footage of our practical monster and drastically alter it using visual effects.

The Canker Man would be digitally warped and molded into a skeletal, grinning creature. The visual effects artists would be using footage that wasn't captured with the intention of being altered that way, so a lot of the artifice would be obvious. He'd become a little rough around the edges. We told ourselves that this would be okay... it was a dream, after all.

Early camera tests of our practical Canker Man suit

The final VFX-enhanced monster This began to nudge our monster away from our core concept. While our practical suit would always need some help from VFX, this was now tilting into an area that strayed from the true identity of the creature.

Another major sticking point was the plot itself.

In the movie, Cody's adopted mother Jessie is shocked to find a physical manifestation of her deceased son, Sean, after Cody sees his picture. She then goes about trying to "rebuild" her dead son in the imagination of her new foster child, hoping to see and interact with him more... "I just want to hear his voice."

This morally questionable exploitation of Cody was, to put it mildly, the entire point of the story. Jessie goes too far, and when she finally resorts to drugging Cody to force him to sleep in the hopes of seeing her lost son, he is unable to wake up from a nightmare and her husband is killed.

Jessie spends the rest of the film clawing her way back to redemption, and having to atone for what she's done, all while finally focusing on Cody's past and healing instead of her own.

As a character, Jessie does things we do not agree with, and they have serious, permanent consequences. And the moral murkiness of this was, frankly, the point.

The studio was flinching hard. "It makes her unlikeable," they argued. There was a push to try to back off of this, and to pull the punch... sure, she could exploit him somewhat, but they wanted to pull it back. Kate Bosworth's performance began to be altered in the cutting room, flinching away from some of the more decisive choices in favor of a more watered-down, morally generic heroine.

This middle ground would prove to be ill-advised.

As we were battling over the edit, something else happened. Oculus was released in theaters in April 2014.

If the movie was a huge hit, it would mean I would likely win more of these arguments, and Somnia would be restored to something closer to my vision. If the movie bombed, the studio could (and likely would) run ramshot over Somnia, twisting it into a more generic studio horror story and jettisoning things they didn't quite understand.

Ultimately, the movie performed... moderately. It was kind of right in the middle. It wasn't a failure, but it wasn't a hit either. Both sides dug in. And suddenly, Somnia was being twisted into something between two tones.

Citing the "disappointing" performance of Oculus (which, frankly, did just fine), the studio insisted that we write and shoot some additional "scares". Among them was one of the worst studio notes I'd ever receive (well, at least until I started working for Netflix.)

The entire premise of the film was that, when Cody slept, his dreams would manifest physically. When he woke up, they would vanish. This was, to put it bluntly, our only rule.

The note came in: "We need a scare set piece to occur when he is awake."

Now, I can't understate how nonsensical this is. It defied the entire premise of the movie. Their rationale (such as it was) was that the audience wouldn't ever be frightened when Cody was awake, because they knew the monsters only came when he was asleep.

"Well yeah," I said. "That's why it's important that the movie isn't just about scares."

But they were insistent. If a monster showed up while Cody was awake, that would be "truly thrilling" and "catch the audience off-guard."

It was the equivalent of saying "the shark in Jaws only attacks people if they're in the water. We need an attack to occur on land." I mean, that would really catch the audience off-guard.

I had no idea how to address this note.

It was early in my career, I didn't have a theatrical hit under my belt, and I didn't have the ammunition to fight it. So I had to address it somehow, and it had to satisfy the studio, or else we may not get our theatrical release after all.

So I ended up writing a scene where Cody is wide awake, only to be attacked in his bed by the specter of a deceased bully (a previous victim of one of his dreams).

How the fuck were we going to make this make any sense? Well, we had to write a whole other scene - much earlier in the film - where a therapist explains the concept of "waking dreams." Jay Karnes (who was a lovely person and one hell of a good sport) had to randomly say "you know, some people can dream while they're awake" to Bosworth, desperately trying to set up this moment.

It doesn't quite work, to say the least. Cody looks under his bed, sits up, and is attacked by this eye-less specter. Then, he's dragged screaming under his bed, until the attack just... stops, for some reason.

We filmed it, and I thought it was the stupidest thing I'd ever shot (it wasn't, though - the stupidest thing I've ever shot remains the on-screen stalking and murder of a cat in the pilot of Midnight Mass, a truly braindead scene that Netflix insisted on adding.)

Along with this scene, which would become the crux of Relativity's trailer, we shot several other random scares that were peppered throughout the movie. Now, this wasn't enough to tip the film entirely into being a horror film... just enough to make it exist awkwardly in between two genres.

It got worse. The addition of all this new "horror" material made the film longer (go figure), so the directive came down to begin removing other elements to make room. Those elements were character development and context.

The cut began to get bumpy. The fairy-tale tone of most of our original footage was at odds with the overt horror tone the studio was insisting upon. Every time we tested one of these cuts, the audience was understandably confused... they really loved the concept, they really loved Jacob, and they all loved the ending revelation - but along the way, what was this movie? Was it a horror film? Was it a drama? A fantasy?

Even with this, our test screenings were actually pretty good. We were testing in the high sixties and seventies - which is, infuriatingly, right in that middle zone: not good enough to kill the studio interference, but not bad enough to let them take over.

So we kept fighting. And we kept cutting. And we kept testing. And with each screening, the studio forced it further and further into this no-man's land.

There were a few victories, though. Danny Elfman came on board to collaborate with the Newton Brothers on our score. Some of our non-horror sequences, like a scene involving Christmas-light butterflies, were being called out by our test audiences in the best ways. But the tug-of-war over the basic identity of the film was tipping decidedly toward the more horror-centric approach.

Finally, the studio came after the title. Somnia was too confusing, they said. Nobody knew what it meant. So, we added a scene where Jay Karnes - once again having to naturally sell force-fed exposition - literally defines the world "somnia" during a therapy scene (these therapy scenes were basically being used to spoon-feed material to the audience.)

That wasn't enough, though. The studio began workshopping other titles, and they landed on perhaps my most hated of all of the options: the ultra-generic Before I Wake, a title already used by a handful of low-budget thrillers over decades. We conceded after it was made clear that it wasn't really up to me in this case, and we limped into what I consider to be the worst title of my career.

With our new uneven tone, a new and "improved" monster, and a groan inducing title, they finally agreed to stop messing with the movie and honor their commitment to releasing it wide.

You tell yourself a lot of things in this business, and I told myself that the heart of the story - the revelation about where the concept of the Canker Man came from - was still intact, so all would be well. Viewers would be able to look past some of the bumps because the payoff was worth it.

But we didn't know what else was happening at Relativity.

They announced the release date for the film, posters started showing up in theaters, and we were anxiously awaiting our big wide theatrical release... when suddenly everything stopped.

We didn't know it yet, but Relativity Media was having huge financial problems. They were on the verge of bankruptcy, as a matter of fact, and though they weren't admitting it yet, internally they were in a state of absolute chaos.

Without warning or explanation, the studio moved us off our date. The movie wouldn't be released after all. We immediately knew something was very wrong, despite Ryan Kavanaugh's insistence that our date was "just a bad date," and that he'd moved the movie in order to make it "an even bigger success." No, this whole thing stunk. It stunk bad.

They set another date, and we watched and waited. But no trailers. No marketing. And then... that date was pushed as well. Again, they insisted everything was fine. But we knew. Something was deeply wrong with the company, and they were lying to us.

Some of this played out publicly. Kavanaugh and I got into a spat on Twitter when I suggested that the studio wasn't able to release the movie theatrically after all (I still don't regret saying this, and man oh man, was I proven right).

Meanwhile, our international distributors were scrambling. We'd sold a lot of international territories off the promise of our big theatrical release in North America, and they weren't going to wait forever. By the third time Relativity pushed our release date, the whole house of cards fell down, and various international territories started releasing the film haphazardly on whatever platforms they could.

There was no coordinated release strategy. Suddenly, the film was just available in Argentina, for example. Or it was On Demand in Russia. I remember being shocked when a German Blu-ray appeared on eBay without warning.

There was no rollout to critics, no coordination at all. Within a few weeks, it was pirated and available on torrent sites everywhere. And without a proper press rollout, the only reviews available were trickling in from these international markets, or random blogs in other countries. A slew of reviews - many of which were from obscure blogs in Russia and Turkey, not even written in English - hit Rotten Tomatoes. With no counterpoint from any credible critics, we debuted with a 30% rotten rating.

It would stay this way for years.

Relativity finally admitted the truth, declared bankruptcy, and went to court. Our movie was dragged down into the vortex with it. Our abysmal tomatometer score suggested that the movie wasn't released because it was bad, not because the studio had gone bankrupt. This assumption stuck to us like glue as the film languished in bankruptcy court.

Heartbroken, we turned our attention elsewhere. I would write and direct both Hush and Ouija: Origin of Evil before the whole distribution saga of Before I Wake was finally resolved.

In the years that followed, very little would be said about Before I Wake, and whatever was said was absolutely not positive... how bad must this movie be, after all, to be so unceremoniously pulled from the release? Some theaters just left the poster up, still saying "Coming Soon." I know of one theater in LA that had it up for over a year.

By the time Relativity finally settled their mess, and the film was unceremoniously given back to us with the most lackluster apology imaginable, and our chances of a domestic theatrical distribution were entirely obliterated. The film was already available online through piracy and a tiny handful of foreign blogs had defined our critical reception. No other studio would touch it.

We were able to arrange one screening of the film once it was unencumbered... we had a single showing at Fantastia in Montreal, a festival I adore. Instead of a huge worldwide theatrical release, the movie would play exactly one time, to one audience.

It was sold out, it played wonderfully, and it remains one of my favorite screenings of my career.

With Mitch Davis, Fantasia's artistic director, Kate Bosworth, and my wife Kate Siegel.

In the years that had passed since we shot Before I Wake, Kate Siegel and I had gotten married. At the premiere, and in the picture above, Kate was pregnant with our son.

We named him Cody, after the little boy in Somnia... the little boy whose dreams came true.

In 2016, Netflix acquired the North American rights to Before I Wake, and quietly dumped it on the service. There was no premiere, no rollout, no screeners sent to critics. One day it just appeared on the service without fanfare, as Netflix does to so many titles.

It didn't even appear on the New Releases tab.

A few critics found the movie on their own, and slowly some new reviews started to trickle out. Bloody Disgusting led the charge, discussing how the film had been wrongfully maligned over the years, and correcting identified it as a "haunted fairy tale" that was being handicapped by the expectations that it was a horror film.

Our tomatometer began to slowly rise. After some time, it tipped out of "rotten" into "fresh"... and today stands comfortably at 66%. Those early, malicious reviews are still there, the movie is still scarred by them... but despite Relativity (and eventually Netflix's) efforts to rebrand the movie as a straight horror film, most critics were able to see it for what it truly was.

Our audience was as well, for the most part. Some viewers yawning their way through the Netflix original horror feature section would find it, and get something maybe just a little more thoughtful than they were expecting. A few people reached out to me to talk about losing their own loved ones to cancer, or about how the sweeter elements of the story impacted them. I've always been grateful for that.

But ultimately, the movie was just brutalized by its studio. I've never again had so much damage inflicted on a project by a creative partner and supposed collaborator. And while Netflix did the bare minimum when it came to releasing the movie, I am still very grateful that that they even did that much... if it wasn't for Netflix picking it up, I think there's every chance Before I Wake would have never been made available at all.

I'm proud of the movie. It's not perfect, by any means - it was an ambitious sophomore effort and I had a lot to learn about a lot of things - but it has some beautiful ideas and some moments that really work. I see its flaws clearly, too, and while I tell myself some were out of my control (like the awkward scares forced on us by Relativity), others were most certainly entirely on me. Not everything works, and that's okay.

But man, Jacob Tremblay is phenomenal in this movie. And I absolutely adore the final ten minutes.

My son Cody is almost 7 now, exactly as old as Jacob was when he was cast to play his namesake. I hope Cody's dreams come true; that's why we named him what we named him.

Sometimes, our dreams don't come true quite how we might expect.

Hollywood is just kinda like that, I guess.

[ballerinarina]

𐙚 HEY, NEW OC IN TOWN, BRELLIES !

NUMBER 8 “Izabela”

[clique aqui para ler a versão em português]

𝐅𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲: Hargreeves; 𝐁𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞: 01/10/1989;

𝐏𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐬: Body transmorphism (advanced habilities: metamorphosis — little explored, only adult phase)

𝐀𝐠𝐞: 36 yo (looks 19); 𝐇𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭: 1,58m; 𝐖𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭: 48 kg;

𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢��𝐧: actress/singer; 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐫: long, dark brown, wavy;

𝐍𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲: Slovak-Brazilian (Slovak mother, born and raised for 4 years in Brazil) — grew up in USA;

𝐋𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬: Portuguese, Slovak, English — native; Spanish, Korean, Russian — refers to brothers; Swedish, Italian, French, Greek — taught by father;

𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐬: Married (to Cinco Hargreeves);

𝐐𝐔𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐒: sweetness, intelligence, charm, dedication, loyalty, good looking, altruism;

𝐃𝐄𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐒: envy, image complex, emotional instability, lack of interess, impulsiveness, resentment;

𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐈𝐍 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐀𝐋 𝐑𝐄𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐏𝐒:

She is the Number Eight because she did not join the Umbrella Academy with the others. Her mother hid her unusual birth for four years, and only after her death she was found and adopted by Reginald Hargreeves. Her powers, however, did not seem to be the most useful in battle (because they were limited to basic physical alterations at the time) and she also had no interest in improving her performance.

Because of that, she was good friends with Klaus and Ben because they found themselves in similar crisis situations and ended up not getting along at all with Luther, who valued the Umbrella Academy so much. With Klaus and Ben, she had a simple, calm relationship, a point of peace where she supported them in their traumas that were worse than hers, when they weren't fighting over nonsense. Without having a megalomaniacally heroic side, she also sometimes aroused Diego's anger, but nothing long-lasting, since the boy had a soft spot for her being kind, helping and understanding him - despite not really prioritizing him.

In the beginning, she even had a very competitive phase against Allison, which, without Izabela's much interest in the action, extended to the academic part and the female presence in the house. As they grew up, however, with both of them interested in the performing arts, they ended up getting closer and helping each other, becoming known together. While Allison guided her career with manipulation, Izabela guided hers with her appearance, developing a strong image complex and obsession with youth. She was the only sibling she kept in frequent contact with after leaving home.

Her closest brother, however, had always been Five: they were confidants and transparent with each other, as if they found refuge whenever they were together. It was only with each other that they confessed their insecurities, cried and told their fears. Knowing how different Five was with the others, Izabela used to feel very jealous of Viktor - whom she liked a lot compared to some other siblings, trying to defend him and creating a good and interesting alliance when they talked alone, but unable to help but develop a problematic complex in her own head when she notices them together. She was in love with Five and despite her unspoken relationship with him, she knew that Viktor also had one that was going down a similar path, although less intimate and completely different.

𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄: I spent SO much time on Pinterest searching for a good shape for Izabela. There were a lot of cute girls there but none were giving me the right vibe.

Then, a Isabelle Drummond pic appeared for me and, even if she wasn't the perfect one yet, with her straight hair, i noticed what I was missing: the Brazilian 00s actress vibe.

And then, i found.

Bro, I swear. Sandy Leah is my FAVORITE Brazilian star since I was a toddler and yet I simply didn't think about her earlier?

For the ones who don't know her, she's a HUGE superstar in Brazil, it feels almost like choosing Zendaya for a fancast. But I can't help, she's the perfect Izabela.