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smoochkooks · 3 years

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—chapter four: white lies

this is a part of my an ode to a broken heart drabble series.

pairing: jeon jungkook/reader

genre: unrequited love, best friends to (?), heavy angst, future smut

word count: 1.5k

summary: it came easy to you to lie. but with every untold truth, you were hurting more on the inside.

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one year and 6 months ago

April was exceptionally moody that year.

Every day you woke up to either heavy rainfall or a beautiful, cloudless sky. Alternatively, it could also snow for a couple of hours just to have it all vanish once the sun reappeared. As much as you loved Spring, you hated the capricious weather with passion.

It was a normal, peaceful, Saturday afternoon. Saturday meant no classes to attend, no work to do on the side. It was just you in your small, cozy apartment, tucked underneath the blanket and binge-watching Attack On Titan.

You were never an anime enthusiast per se, but you happened to befriend a doe-eyed weeb all those years ago. Your current occupation was just a part of the aftermath. It wasn’t like Jungkook was obsessed, not at all. He was actually far from it. Now, at the tender age of twenty-three, his old hobby was like a relapse. His love for anime was coming in waves every once in a while, gradually transforming into a two-months-long hyperfixation and then, it was nothing. And the cicle continued.

He was currently in the stage of re-watching Attack On Titan, hence why you had been forced to finally give the damned anime a try as well. Hell, he was even coming over tonight to have a marathon with you.

(He’d said that season three, his favourite, you had to watch alongside him.)

You: eren's annoying little shit

Jungkook: told you so

You: but levi? damn I’d sell my soul for him

Jungkook: for a 5’2 emotionally unavailable man?

You: yep. that’s my type

It was far from truth. As much as you liked Captain Levi, he wasn’t Jungkook. You are my type, you wanted to write instead. There hadn’t been a man in my life who managed to even come close to you. But, as always, you kept those confessions to yourself.

Right when you were about to play another episode, your phone buzzed again.

Jungkook: I have a weird question

You: I’m used to that

You: shoot your shot.

Jungkook: what’s your finger size?

Confused, you read his last message once again. That was indeed a weird fucking question to ask, you thought. You had never really been a fan of rings. You only owed one - a gift from your grandmother she gave you for your sixteenth birthday. Rummaging thorough your drawer, you found it in a separate, black case.

It still fit just right, so you took a ruler, measured the size and googled the results.

You: it’s 7.5 I guess

You: why do you ask tho?

Jungkook: I need you to go somewhere with me before our marathon if that’s okay

You: you didn’t answer my question

You: but okay. what time?

Jungkook: ill pick you up at 5pm

Jungkook: you’ll see

Maybe it was for the better he hadn’t told you where he was taking you. If you had know, you would have backed away last minute. Come up with so lame excuse, blame it all on a headache or period cramps.

If you had known Jungkook was taking you to pick up an engagement ring for Soojin, you would have never come with him.

When you parked in front of one of the most high-ranking jewellery stores dowtown, the solemnity of the situation hit you like a whiplash. You took a deep, shuddering breath. Jungkook was thinking about marrying Soojin. Jungkook was going to propose to her, soon. He was ready to spent the rest of his life with her.

Jeon Jungkook, the love of your life, was about to slip out of your reach for good.

You couldn’t cry. Not in front of him. You clenched your fists so tight the knuckles turned white.

“I figured out you could help me,” Jungkook said, breaking the silence and unbuckled his seatbelt. “I checked Soojin's finger size once when she was showering and then I found out that your’s the same and well, you’re a girl so you obviously know more about jewellery than me and–”

“Jungkook,” you cut him off with a dry chuckle. You didn’t want him to speak. You didn’t want to see him. You wanted to jumped off his car and ran away from that place as far as possible. “You don’t have to explain yourself. I get it.”

You smiled at him with reassurance. It was actually hilarious, how you mastered the art of feigning your real feelings when you were with him. It came easy to you to lie but with every untold truth, you were hurting more on the inside.

“I’m here, so you don’t have to worry about chosing something horrible.”

He grinned and you noticed a dust of pink covering the apples his cheeks. It was hard, so fucking hard seeing him happy because that was all you ever wanted and yet it pained you not to be the main source of it. Jungkook was twenty-three and already so in love he wanted to get married. You were going to see him in a black tux, a prince charming waiting in front of the altar for his princess.

It ached. Why did it ache to see him happy?

The lady who worked at the jewellery store greeted you politely with a bow. “What can I do for you?” she asked.

“We are looking for engagement rings.” Jungkook answered.

You could tell she was a bit astounded but her professional smile never faltered when she responded with, “Oh, that’s still quite unusual to see the couple chosing an engagement ring together.”

You were about to protest but then, Jungkook did something you would never expect him to do.

He grasped your hand.

(It was warm. His touch was soothing. Comforting. Then why did it hurt so bad?)

“My girlfriend wants to chose the ring herself but she doesn’t know when she will get it.”

To make matters worse, he sent you a wink. The store’s clerk cooed at the scene and clasped a hand over her chest. For her it was yet another day at work, yet another pair of adults who had decided to get marry.

“You make a really beautiful couple.” she said.

Even Jungkook’s hand squeezing yours couldn’t ease the sting you felt hearing her speak those words to you. You smiled lightly for good measure. She then pointed at the display and gave you some time and space too look at the options.

Your whole face felt hot. Jungkook was still holding your hand, still playing the role of a perfect boyfriend. He didn’t seem to notice what kind of effect it had on you. He didn’t know how fast your heart was beating, how warm his touch felt on your skin. It was all just a silly joke to him.

He leaned closer to you, so the store's clerk couldn’t hear him. His breath tickled your skin. “You’re blushing.” he whispered.

“Shut up.”

He chuckled and let go of your hand. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable.”

(No matter how much it hurt you on the inside, you already missed his touch.)

“It’s okay. Let’s chose my damned ring, shall we?” you proposed, mustering a nonchalant tone.

Dodging uneasiness with humor always worked out, it seemed.

You felt odd and out of place standing next to him and staring at all those glimmering jewels. In the corner of the eye you saw the lady who worked there glancing at you from time to time and that was when you remembered you were supposed to act like a soon-to-be fiancée.

“They’re all pretty.” you said to Jungkook.

“Which one you like the most then?”

You didn’t have to think long about the answer. The ring with an emerald stone caught your eye from the beginning. It was different than the others, definitely not a standard choice for engagement but something about its peculiarity made you want it to have it shinning on your finger one day.

Except, you weren’t here for yourself. Jungkook wasn’t your boyfriend. You were helping him chose a ring for Soojin. And you knew exactly what she would like.

So you pointed at the number thirty-two. A sparkling, white-gold ring with an oval-shaped diamond.

Jungkook let out a hum. “It’s really pretty, yeah. Excuse me,” he called. “My girlfriend would like to try out this one.”

You ignored the phantom pain you felt as you put the ring on. You flexed your fingers and just for a moment, you pretended it wasn’t a farce your best friend came up with. The diamond shone brightly just like the glimmers of happiness in Jungkook's eyes. He didn’t have to worry about Soojin's answer. He knew it would be thousand times yes.

You were good at pretending. After all, you had been practicing the art of it almost your entire life.

So you drove with Jungkook to your apartment and listened to him babbling about his newest project at work. You made snacks, sat in front of your TV and spent the next couple of hours watching Attack On Titan. You cursed him for spoiling you a few bits of the show and Jungkook, like the petty Virgo he was, reminded you how you accidentally revealed him Little Women's ending because you had read the book years before.

As you laughed and bickered with him, you still remembered about the crimson box tucked in the pocket of his leather jacket, but you didn’t allow yourself to break. Not yet.

It was only when Jungkook fell asleep around 1am that you stepped into the shower and let the tears flow.

And a week later, when the dreaded became real–

Jungkook: she said yes!!!

A white lie was told to avoid hurting someone’s feelings.

You: I’m so happy for you, Jungkook!

After all, the best you could do was give up your happiness for the sake of his own.

#jungkook smut #btswritingcafe #ksmutclub #bangtanarmynet #bangtanhq #jungkook angst #jungkook x reader #jungkook fanfic #jungkook x you #bts smut #my writing #an ode to a broken heart

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stanharu · 3 years

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beastars episode 24 thoughts!

this post got kinda long i have Many Thoughts on this one

Overall I had fun watching this ep but I could really tell it was rushed and there was so much that got cut, which makes me super sad. our fears about the finale having pacing issues due to all the added scenes & rearranging were confirmed & it rly sucks, but i'll elaborate more on that in a bit.

this week's ep covered the end of chapter 92, chapters 93-97, and included small bits of chapters 98 & 99.

so the ep starts with the ED and the latter part of the tunnel scene with ibuki and louis. i liked the visual effect they used to show that they were in the dark. louis' voice acting was also On Point. for the most part i think this scene was done pretty well but I can tell it's being rushed also. I really wish we got more buildup and narration instead of just jumping straight to ibuki telling louis to shoot him. the way it is in the anime feels less impactful imo.

also im sad we didnt get to see this in the anime

before i move on, i wanna talk a bit about louis and his relationship w/ the shishigumi and ibuki. i feel like in the anime quite a few of the lil moments that really endear you to the shishigumi and also ibuki were either cut or kinda glossed over, which is strange to me considering how much effort and care went into the ED. it's very emotional and good but i feel like maybe anime onlies are missing out only seeing the anime and the MV. but idk.

legosi and riz's fight was quite rushed as well. there's so much narration and dialogue missing from it and that really rubs me the wrong way. It wasn't all bad but compared to the manga I just don't think it's as good. I will say tho that I really liked the sequence w legosi and the moths. I thought it looked really nice and was pretty well done.

also i liked how the backgrounds had some anti-yahya graffiti, its a nice touch imo

it says "high quality horse meat"

I was happy to see legosi do the "tell me more" pose but I'm honestly disappointed that the anime took out the whole exposition about why legosi did it. like i feel like without that it's just legosi being weird when he has a reason for it!!! This is just one example of the anime taking out crucial narration during the fight.

I also think it's kinda weird how they changed how louis shows up at the fight. im not sure how i feel about riz just charging at him like that, but i liked how legosi kicked him before they ran lol.

i dont have much to say about pina's small scene but I did wanna say that during my first watch thru of the ep i was too distracted trying to read the graffiti behind him that i didn't notice him getting his phone out of the dumpster and calling the cops lmao

it says "devour yahya"

and now... here we are... the predation scene.

overall i thought it was pretty well done but, like the rest of the ep, i could tell it was also being kinda rushed. some important beats werent given enough time to really sink in, and there's a few bits of narration taken out of this part as well that i find disappointing :^(

tho i did like how the anime called back to this scene in s1 when legosi mentions utilizing his strength.

also this part where louis is remembering ibuki had me like😭

I also really liked seeing louis cry. I was crying too sjdflskjdflsjkdf. i thought that scene was really good, its prolly my favorite part of the ep tbh. getting to hear the whole predation scene voiced made me kind of a mess lol. i really liked louis' expressions throughout this whole ep too. studio orange used their whole louis expression budget on these last 2 eps lmao.

seeing legosi instantly get all beefed up was great too. he looked a little ridiculous but i kinda loved it lol. he's so huge and poofy. i love him.

big pomeranian

anyway, im also sad they took out louis' line about being reduced to a flashback character lol. instead he tells legosi "be a hero" again which... im not sure about that change. i liked the part with riz thinking back about tem tho. tho imo the way riz realizes he's in the wrong feels pretty sudden. again adding to how rushed the whole ep feels.

before i move on again i just wanna say legosi looks so cute. even all puffed up and covered in blood. how does he do that

baby boy baby. i wanna ruffle his cheek floofs.

i think one of the things im most disappointed about from this whole ep was how the fight got wrapped up. i really like how the cops show up and totally shift the tone in the manga jslkdfjskljdf. im also really sad we didnt get this interaction

tthe anime really took out most of the sillier moments from the finale, which makes me pretty sad to think about. i know the anime and manga have different tones but pls let the boys be silly sometimes!!

the next part where legosi and louis finally establish their friendship was really cute tho ❤️ even tho it was pretty different i enjoyed it a lot.

BABIESSSS 🥺😭❤️❤️

the wrap-up for this arc and this episode gave me whiplash sdjlfkjsdf. it literally speedruns thru legosi's predation conviction, being released, louis & haru's graduation, and legosi deciding he's going to drop out of school. that is SO MUCH AT ONCE. also i was holding out hope that legosi would have his new years call with haru after the fight instead but that didnt happen!! so it just got cut!!! kinda mad about that tbh. legosi and haru having a lil scene at the very end made up for it a lil bit but that's still one of haru's few moments in this arc that's just not included.

we didnt even get the part wher legosi learns he can't marry haru bc of his conviction.

ive been really hoping for a season 3 announcement once this season ended. with all the background allusions to yahya, the added plot point of someone stealing elephant tusks, and sebun and melon's lil cameos in this season, it seemed to me that studio orange was kinda teasing a 3rd season. but now, with the dismissive way the anime ended, and paru's note from earlier today, im less sure about the possibility of a 3rd season. i'd still like to see the rest of the series animated, but i guess we'll just have to wait and see if more anime is announced in the future.

if we do get another season in the future i just hope that we swing back around and actually address the things that got completely glossed over in the last couple minutes of this episode instead of charging forward w/o touching them again.

i really think the finale for this arc should've been two episodes at least. not including the tunnel scene. i think then things wouldn't have felt so rushed. people have been saying this season really would have benefitted from at least 1 extra episode and i cant help but agree. some have even suggested a whole 24 episodes just for this arc, but i think that this arc couldve been done properly with 12 or 13 episodes if there was some better prioritizing on what to include and what to cut.

like i dont mind not getting the parts about legosi's family if they can be addressed somehow in a future season (or if theres no more future anime seasons thats a plot thread that doesnt have to be worried about). i could have lived w/o seeing sheila & peach's chapter animated if it meant more time for the focus of this arc. and was the kangaroo red herring really necessary?

adaptation wise, i dont think this season was as good as the first. i still think it did fairly well, but i know that it could have been much better. ive been excited to watch this season with my friends once the dub releases, but now im wondering if i should just tell them to read the manga instead. sighs idk. perhaps it comes thru better as a bingewatch, or perhaps im being a bit too harsh. idk. at some point ill do a rewatch and see how i feel about the season as a whole, but that wont be for a while.

if you've read this far, thanks for reading my ramblings!! it's been fun to make these posts every week and im gonna miss getting new episodes every week.

#beastars #beastext #legosi #legoshi #louis

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dontmeantobepoliticalbut · 3 years

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Bernie Sanders gave Washington whiplash this week — and it was all part of his plan. Barely 24 hours after the Vermont senator publicly rejected a $3.5 trillion spending deal following a Monday meeting with President Joe Biden, he turned around to tout it as the most transformational policy proposal in nearly 100 years.

The shift in tone was a tactic Sanders used to coax moderate Democrats into going far higher than they might have otherwise felt comfortable. After he had insisted on shooting for the moon with a $6 trillion budget proposal, $3.5 trillion suddenly looked pretty reasonable.

The episode revealed a conciliatory side to the liberal icon often depicted by the media and Republicans as wild-eyed and well to the left of his party. Sanders has opposed some of Biden and Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer’s policies and nominees, but never in instances when his vote would prove decisive. He’s also softened his opposition to a bipartisan infrastructure deal, recognizing that he can't alienate his fellow Democrats if he wants to move his own agenda.

Still, the Independent from Vermont isn’t quite ready for the “P” label. “It’s not that I’m more pragmatic. It’s that there are 50 members of the Democratic Caucus. And unfortunately not all of them agree with me on everything,” Sanders said in an interview. “It was important to have a vision going forward of where we needed to go. And I think that was the right vision,” Sanders added. “Obviously, it was a vision that was a little bit more comprehensive than some of my colleagues.”

Even after two presidential runs garnered him national stardom and effective ownership of the American left, Sanders has toiled in the Senate minority with few levers to pull. This Congress, as the Senate Budget chair and a member of Schumer’s leadership team, the 79-year-old is one of the most powerful people in Democratic-controlled Washington. He also seems to be having a good time after decades of prowling the Capitol with gruff rebuttals for reporters delivered in his signature Brooklyn accent. After his interview with POLITICO, he was pressed by another reporter to take “one more question.”

“She makes me speculate,” he teased the second reporter, his voice rising in playful incredulousness. “One more question?!”

Jokes aside, moderates surmised it wasn’t easy for Sanders to shed his uncompromising stance on this year's massive spending blueprint, which is still perhaps months away from becoming law. Tester, who quickly endorsed Sanders’ budget blueprint, despite reservations, observed that Sanders likely “had hesitation” in coming down by $2.5 trillion.

“It may have been one of those deals where it was: ‘Look, Bernie, if we don’t get this, we can’t do anything.’ And he decided to move with it,” Tester said of the haggling. Yet senators on the Budget Committee viewed Sanders as taking an extreme position precisely so that it would yield a compromise all the more fruitful for liberal Democrats. If Sanders had started off endorsing Biden’s number of $4 trillion, it’s possible he and other progressives might have had to settle for a number lower than the $3.5 trillion they agreed upon. “Bernie Sanders is like a human embodiment of shifting the Overton Window,” said Sen. Tim Kaine (D-Va.), who serves on the Budget Committee. “We wouldn’t be there without him putting out $6 trillion.”

With a ceiling of $3.5 trillion, Sanders says he can pursue all the changes that he’s prioritized, just not for not as long as he wants. That raises the possibility of future fights over the extension of programs like the expanded child tax credits championed by Democrats. Nonetheless, Sanders argues every chance he gets that he’s pushing “the most consequential piece of legislation passed since the 1930s for working people.” On the price tag alone, he’s right: If successful, the current social spending bill will be the biggest ever passed by Congress.

Those ambitious aspirations, and his influence on the Democrat Party’s agenda, make Sanders a handy villain for Republicans. The GOP tried to use his possible ascension in the majority as an attack line in the Georgia Senate races -- only to see Democrats win those contests, giving Sanders the budget gavel. Senate Republicans still try to tie vulnerable Democrats to Sanders, more so even than Biden or Schumer. “We applaud Bernie Sanders’ commitment to socialism and his influential leadership pushing 2022 Senate Democrat candidates to the far left,” said Katharine Cooksey, a spokeswoman for the National Republican Senatorial Campaign Committee.

In addition to his central role in the Democratic caucus, Sanders also has the ear of former presidential rival Biden. Since winning the nomination and throughout the first six months of his presidency, the president has kept Sanders close. White House chief of staff Ron Klain essentially had an open-door policy with Sanders as he pushed for a $15 minimum wage earlier this year. That hike was ultimately crushed by moderates and the Senate parliamentarian, an early blow for Sanders.

But Sanders returned quickly to press Biden to embrace an expansion of Medicare coverage for dental, hearing aids and vision. During a private Oval Office meeting ahead of the budget announcement, Sanders “made that case passionately” again and Biden “gave his full backing,” said a senior White House aide. Andrew Bates, a White House spokesman, said Biden “deeply respects Senator Sanders’ unflinching commitment to fighting for working people."

Medicare expansion is included in Senate Democrats’ budget proposal, though it’s unclear whether Sanders will be able to lower the Medicare eligibility age as he set out to do months ago. Nonetheless, Sanders seems close to cinching a major change to an entitlement program that's helped define the party's legacy for generations.

For many years, Sanders played “a kind of gadfly role,” said David Axelrod, who served as an adviser to former President Barack Obama, who Sanders briefly entertained primarying during the 2012 presidential campaign. But now, he added, Sanders “has comfortably shifted into the role of deal-maker."

“You're seeing a very pragmatic Bernie Sanders, but he's pragmatic in a principled way,” Axelrod said, observing that Biden and Sanders, “who really were from different places in the party, have come together in the sunset of their careers to do something potentially historic.”

Asked if Sanders is a pragmatist, Sen. Brian Schatz (D-Hawaii) offered a clipped “yes” for an answer: “I don’t want to get him in trouble.”

This isn’t the first deal Sanders has cut, and it probably won’t be the last. In 2014 he memorably teamed with the late Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) on a landmark agreement to reform the scandal-plagued Veterans Affairs Department. As part of that agreement, Sanders signed off on expanding private care access for veterans, a concession directly at odds with his long-standing commitment to single-payer health care. Sanders also struck an alliance last year with Sen. Josh Hawley (R-Mo.) in pushing for new pandemic stimulus checks.

“He’s obviously a passionate advocate. But he also understands this is a moment that we can’t let go by,” said Michigan Sen. Debbie Stabenow, a member of the Budget Committee and Democratic leadership. “He was able to read the room.”

Sanders is already digging in for the next round of fights. He may have centrist Sen. Mark Warner (D-Va.) and the rest of the Budget Committee on board with his budget plan, but he still needs to win over more conservative Democratic Sens. Joe Manchin of West Virginia and Kyrsten Sinema of Arizona. Manchin said he hasn’t yet talked to Sanders about the proposal.

Once again, Sanders is drawing a line in the sand, saying he’s not coming down any more from $3.5 trillion. Time will tell whether this one is real or tactical. “No. Quite the contrary,” he said, hinting that progressive allies across the Capitol might drive the price back up. “We’ll see what happens in the House.”

#politics #us politics #news #biden administration #infrastructure #infrastructure bill #infrastructure budget #bernie gets it #bernie forever #bernie for the people #bernie sanders #sen. bernie sanders #politico

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spooks-and-tea · 4 years

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Entangled (Spencer Reid x femReader)

Summary: You don’t know how it happened. One moment you were watching Criminal Minds, and the next moment you were literally in the show. Can Spencer be the key to helping you find your way back home?

Warnings: minor character death, mentions of su*cide, bad explanations of quantum mechanics, sexual situations, the usual criminal minds-type content

A/N: wow I’ve been on this site for ages, nearly as long as Criminal Minds was on air, lol, but this is my first fic posted here. I plan to make this one into a few parts if people like it. If this has any relation to other fics it’s not intended. Literally just an idea that popped in my brain. I’ll also eventually add it to my wattpad .@ kittentastic

Word Count: 3,119

Chapter 1. Chapter 2. Chapter 3. Chapter 4. Chapter 5. Chapter 6. Chapter 7. Chapter 8. Chapter 9. Chapter 10. Chapter 11.

It was an average, lonely, autumn night. Halloween was nearing and you didn't have anywhere to be. Long estranged from the people you once called family, and friends, you were starting a new life in L.A.

Yeah, you were one of those small-town girls with big-city dreams. You wanted to be an actress, a dream your father had once encouraged. When he suddenly died, you had nothing left but a new step-mother who discouraged your dreams and was more than happy to disown you when you reached 18 years of age; a classic Cinderella story.

It had taken a while, getting yourself through university and saving up enough money to move out to L.A. Now you were 27 and living your dreams...partly. You worked at a coffee shop in Hollywood; a great way to meet people that could potentially cast you in a big production, but that plan had yet to come to fruition. Every audition would have someone else in mind for the part.

Today, you had finished yet another round of auditions for everything from small commercial bits to tv shows. You poured yourself a glass of red wine after finishing your microwavable meal-for-one dinner. Wine would always be your go-to drink after your dissappointing days, it was great at helping you sleep. You clicked on the tv and sipped your drink from your criss-crossed sitting position and soon found a Criminal Minds marathon that was just starting. It almost seemed like fate as tomorrow you had an audition lined up for the very same show.

You smiled as the bright, happy, Penelope Garcia came into the shot, followed by the rest of the BAU. You absentmindedly bit your lip as Dr. Spencer Reid came into frame.

Like a large percentage of the show's viewership, you found the handsome genius slipping into one or two of your fantasies. You may have daydreamed about the Dr. being a real person and walking into your workplace to order coffee and whisk you off your feet. You may have also woken up from a few dreams involving the handcuffs he was currently restraining an unsub with.

You wondered if you would get the part. Would it be odd having to pretend this dream-man was real? You'd hope you could contain your blushing around Matthew at least.

You finished your drink and stretched out on the couch, already feeling your eyes growing heavy. You found your mind wandering as you grew more and more tired, hardly paying attention to the episode. The last thought you had before you drifted off was, "what if Spencer Reid was a real person?"

Bright lights of assorted colors and shapes danced behind your tired eyes. You felt a tugging sensation that seemed to pull you from your core. It felt warm and safe, like it wanted to protect you. A hum grew louder and louder in your ear canal, followed by a crackling wind. It was like an electric storm. The smell of coffee and a woodsy vanilla filled whatever place you were in. It was odd, you knew this, but you weren't scared. Something told you this was right. Your body began to rise higher and higher until a loud snap echoed around you, shattering your surroundings.

"Whoa, sleeping on the job now Y/N? Did someone tire you out last night?" A woman's voice broke through the fog as your mind caught up with you.

Wait, am I still dreaming? That voice...it sounds like...

"Pretty Boy, you wanna check her for a pulse?"

And that is definitely...

"I-I don't think that's necessary."

You slowly lifted your head and opened your eyes wide. Your blurred vision slowly grew used to the bright indoor lighting. Your eyes widened as you saw none other than JJ, Morgan, and Reid. Yes, the fictional characters were standing in front of you.

How was this even possible? You had to be dreaming, or maybe you were forgetting and you were at a very strange audition. Yes, that had to be it, logically.

"Good morning Sleeping Beauty. Rough night? I didn't think Reid's Doctor Who nights were that wild, I might have to tag along and chaperone you two next time." Morgan greeted with a teasing smirk.

"How late did you two go for last night?" JJ asked, leaning against the desk that you had been sleeping on, and sipping her coffee.

She directed the question to you, but you didn't remember this dialogue in the audition script. When you didn't answer, Spencer spoke up.

"She texted me when she got home safe at 9:43pm. I made sure she left early as the rain was starting up. Now, of course, she could have stayed up longer, but we continued to exchange texts until she texted me goodnight at 10:15pm."

"Goodnight texts? Remind me and JJ here why you two aren't dating again?" Morgan crossed his arms looking between you and Spencer.

You blinked, taking a chance to finally look around. There were no cameras in sight. Above you was a tiled ceiling with office lighting. No directors or normal-looking crew members were around.

"Matthew?" You asked, directing your question to a stuttering, red-faced Reid.

Everyone turned their attention back to you. Reid, or Matthew, raised his eyebrow at you. And turned to look if anyone was standing behind him that you could be talking to.

"Who is Matthew, Y/N?" He asks, cautiously.

Oh my god. I must be dreaming.

You stood up and slowly reached out to Reid, who was standing closest to you. You gently poked his cheek. He looked almost afraid at your actions.

"Spencer?" You lower your shaky hand. He felt real, he was standing in front of you. You could smell his morning coffee.

"Yeah?"

"Pinch me."

"What? Why?"

"So I know that I'm not dreaming." You could feel his eyes prodding you, profiling.

"Maybe we should get you to a doctor-"

You grabbed his wrist and placed his hand on your upper arm.

"Pinch me. Hard."

Spencer winced as he did what you asked of him. He obviously did not want to hurt you. You felt your nerves fire off in pulses of pain where he pinched. You sharply inhaled and he immediately dropped his hand.

"Oh my god," you stammered, "ohmygodohmygodohmygod."

This is real. Spencer Reid is real.

You slid back down in your chair and looked at an open mouthed JJ and Morgan, staring at you in shock.

"What kind of kinky shit are you two into?" Morgan narrowed his eyes at Reid.

"This is no time for teasing Derek. I think she's suffering from a concussion." JJ reached out, concerned, feeling your forehead for a fever.

"She doesn't have any visible signs of bruising. Y/N do you remember hitting your head on anything, or experiencing whiplash today?" Reid, growing serious turned your chair towards him, raking his fingers through your hair to check your scalp for any tender spots.

For a moment you had to stop yourself from sighing, it just felt nice, and it was Spencer.

"No I'm-I'm fine, my head feels fine." You answered.

"What's the last thing you remember doing?"

You bit your lip, should you answer him truthfully? How would you even explain something so illogical.

"I-I remember. I fell asleep on the couch watching tv." In a different reality.

"Do you think it's possible you rolled off of the couch in your sleep?"

You frowned to yourself.

"It's possible."

It's never happened before, but you suppose it would explain things. This was definitely a hallucination. Maybe it was one of those Spencer-centric dreams.

"Spence, I think you should take Y/N to the hospital. I'll cover for you with Hotch." JJ suggested.

Spencer nodded in agreement while Morgan looked worriedly at you. JJ got up from the desk to seek out Hotch in his office.

"Do you have your keys?" Spencer asked, still looking you over.

"Um-" you checked your pockets and sure enough found a ring of keys in your pants pocket. You dropped them into Spencer's outstretched hand.

"Can you walk?" Spencer's voice went softer.

You shivered as you did whenever you heard that tone on the show. He could make a living doing ASMR with that voice.

You stood with Spencer's unneeded, but much appreciated, help. He seemed to have no problem holding your hands to help you, something you considered to be out of character for the germaphobic Dr. Reid. Then again, the show did not go this long without it's occasional inconsistencies. Was your subconscious hallucination really thinking these things out?

You followed him to the elevator with ease, taking in your surroundings as you went. As the elevator doors closed, Spencer frowned at you once again.

"Your pupils have been dilated since you woke up." He spoke.

Yeah probably because the attractive genius I've been dreaming of for years is vividly realistic and talking to me.

"Is that a sign of head trauma?"

"Actually yes, you could be experiencing a sensitivity to light as a result of your head trauma. If that's the case, then you're in luck because it's been raining all day."

You followed Spencer out to your car, or at least you thought it was your car. You didn't exactly own one before dropping into this hallucination world. You were saving up for one, but didn't really need it as you lived close to your job and took public transit when you needed to go further distances. This car was nice, you supposed the dream BAU job payed well.

Spencer drove you to the hospital and waited in the waiting room as you received a full check up and MRI. You hoped he wasn't too bored waiting. As the doctor returned with your results you asked if Spencer could come in to hear the diagnosis. The doctor asked if he was family and you lied saying he was your fiancé. The doctor really didn't seem to care and Spencer was allowed in. He looked confident, prepared to discuss anything scientific that you may not understand yourself.

"Well Y/N, after reviewing your MRI scans and testing results, I can confidently assure you that you are perfectly healthy. We can order some blood tests for you if you wish, but from the concussion symptoms you thought you had, and from the results I have in front of me, I don't believe they are necessary." The doctor said with a smile, probably just happy to be delivering some good news.

"That can't be right." You shook your head and frowned.

"Y/N was clearly exhibiting fatigue, light sensitivity, memory loss, and confusion at work. If she's not concussed, what is wrong with her?" Spencer asked.

"I'd say your fiancé is simply experiencing the effects of exhaustion and a lack of sleep. My advice? Take her home and let her rest."

Spencer firmly shut his mouth as the doctor said "fiancé."

The doctor turned to you. "If you'd like, I can perscribe you a sleeping sedative."

You shook your head "no." You couldn't believe it; you'd slept at a reasonable hour, and you didn't feel fatigued.

Everything was starting to feel so real. The warmth of Spencer sitting so close to you felt real. The rain that fell on your skin felt real. The medicinal scent of the hospital made your feel sick. You could only think of one final way to try to wake up.

"Spencer can you stop somewhere for me?" You asked as he drove you home.

"Sure."

"Is there a lake near by?"

"Yeah...you don't remember? You've jogged on the trails near it with JJ and Morgan."

"Can you take me there? There's something I need to do."

You were beginning to grow used to the worried look on his face. The way his eyes softened reminded you of a puppy.

Suddenly, a thought occurred to you. If this was a dream concocted by your brain, wouldn't Spencer be a bit more romantic? In your dreams he could range from a hardcore, post-prison, genius, bad boy to a nerdy romantic, but he was always, obviously, interested in you right away. This Spencer seemed to be your friend, just your friend. By now he would've usually confessed his undying love and maybe taken you in the back seat of your car. Yeah, you weren't the most creative person. What kind of dream was this?

You felt a blush coming on as Spencer side-eyed you. Your brain would never torture you with a long-con, would it?

Spencer took you to the lake, walking beside you without a word, most likely thinking you were going crazy and in need of sleep. You walked to the edge of the trail and looked down at the lake. It was a ways down, the point you were standing was more like a cliff. You determined that the water must have been about a 6 second drop down for someone your size

"Y/N, why did you want me to take you out here?" Spencer asked as he eyed the waters below.

You stayed silent as you took a few steps back. You took a deep breath, and before you could second-guess yourself, you ran to the edge of the cliff and jumped.

"Y/N!" Was the last, panicked thing you heard before the body of water came rushing towards you.

Your body submerged in the icy cold water and sunk deep down from the speed at which you fell. All you could hear was the echoing pressure of the water against your eardrums. This was your last resort. You knew if anything could wake you up, it would be this, your biggest fear.

Your father had drowned, he worked on a fisherman's boat and a storm had overturned the ship far out in the ocean. All that had been recovered was assorted pieces of the ship's wreckage. You'd never even had the chance to learn how to swim as the fear had already settled in before your step-mother could arrange lessons.

If you could drown in this confusing dream-world, maybe you would wake up in time for your Criminal Minds audition.

Your lungs protested as you let yourself sink. You closed your eyes and let your muscles relax. Your head screamed at you, telling you that you absolutely should not be doing this. Fear prickled at your skin. Why did this feel like you were actually dying?

A heartbeat later, you heard the water's surface explode above you, but you didn't have the strength to look up. Your brain processed something wrapping around you and tugging you up, but you could not open your eyes to see what it was. You held on to your last bit of consciousness as you breeched the surface of the water and felt the chilly air assault your skin.

Arms pulled you somewhere. Your body was dragged up something solid, the backs of your legs scraped against rocks. It must have been land. Hands applied pressure, pushing like a heartbeat against your center, you could hardly feel it. A hand held your mouth open while another pinched your nose closed. Lips pushed, rushed, against your own as air was forced back into you. The hand left your mouth and returned to pumping.

"Come on. Come back to me Y/N. Please." Pleading followed by more air.

The strange entity repeated the process once more before you felt everything come up, forcing you back to reality.

You coughed and choked up water and bile; the rain washed it all away. Your lungs were aching and your skin was ice cold. The only warmth was what lingered from the person's lips. A hand pat and rubbed your back, helping you cough up everything. When it was all over your whole body was shivering. Your muscles gave out and a pair of arms wrapped around you, holding you up.

"Y/N."

You weakly turned your head.

Spencer. He's still here. He's really here.

He was soaked, hair ringlets stuck to his face, and his eyes were rimmed red. He looked like an angel, hand carved by Michelangelo himself.

Your brain was trying to catch up with his words.

"Y/N, I need to get you back to the car before we both go into hypothermia. Can you walk?" He asked through chattering teeth.

Your throat was killing you, so you opted for just shaking your head "no" in response.

"I'll have to carry you then, okay?"

You nodded, doubtful he could, especially in his weakened state.

He stood, grabbing his bearings before scooping you up. You weakly held his neck and lay your head on his shoulder. Your pain was numbed, you knew, from the biting cold.

Spencer managed to carry you all the way back to the car, placing you gently in the backseat and turning the heat all the way up. He climbed in the backseat with you and began to remove his jacket and tie.

"We have to remove our clothes, they're soaking wet and we have to warm up. Do you need me to help you undress?" There was no hint of teasing or slyness in Spencer's voice. He was completely serious and you knew he was right.

"I-I can't. Everything is numb." You managed to croak out, wincing at the pain it brought your throat.

"Alright, um- I'll only remove your shirt and pants."

You nodded, weakly.

Spencer removed his own shirt before carefully lifting yours over your head. He made sure to keep his eyes on your face as much as possible and not linger his gaze anywhere else. Next he removed your shoes, socks, and peeled your pants down your legs. You managed to arch your back slightly to help him. Lastly, he removed his own pants and threw all the clothes in a pile on the floor of you car.

"I'm going to hold you now, if that's alright. We need each other's body heat." Spencer looked less confident now. You managed to nod a "yes."

If you weren't so close to death, you knew your brain would be shorting out at the thought of being held by a half-naked, and very real, Spencer Reid.

He helped you lay down across the seats and settled in next to you. He wrapped his arms around you and rubbed his hands along your shoulders and back in an effort to warm you and massage your tensed muscles.

A few minutes of this went by before you could finally move. You wrapped your arms around Spencer, holding him close as his body warmed your own, and you cried against his chest.

One thought repeated over and over again in your head.

This is real.

You worked for the BAU and Spencer Reid had just saved your life.

Next Chapter

#spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid #spencer reid fic #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds fic #criminal minds #fanfiction #drama #romance #cm

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according-to-the-laura · 3 years

Text

StackedNatural Day 18: 5x05, 6x03, 9x01, 15x14

StackedNatural Masterpost: [x]

October 8, 2021

5x05: Fallen Idols

Written by: Julie Siege

Directed by: James L. Conway

Original air date: October 8, 2009

Plot Synopsis:

Sam and Dean head to a small town where people are murdered by famous dead icons. However the brothers come to a dead end when two teenagers reveal they saw Paris Hilton kidnap their friend.

Features:

James Dean, Abraham Lincoln, Gandhi, wax museums, Dean Winchester’s daddy issues, murdering Paris Hilton with an axe.

My Thoughts:

Another fast and dirty one folks, let’s get going.

I never thought before about what whiplash it is to go from The End into this episode. Honestly I thought I was going to find this episode annoying but it was really fun! Dean is such a nerd about James Dean and there are so many big relatable sibling energy moments that made me laugh out loud.

You gotta love the opening when there’s a very serious emotional moment going on with the brothers and then in big letters it says ‘GUEST STARRING PARIS HILTON’. In what other show do you get this?

It is funny to watch them being like “we have to break the cycle! We can’t keep going like this!’ when yesterday we watched them have the same conversation from six seasons later.

It is increasingly clear that none of these writers understand teenage girls even at all - how they dress, how they talk, who they care about. I was a teenager in 2010 and I literally only knew Paris Hilton’s name, not anything else about her.

I completely forgot about the Dean’s daddy issues being exposed and it ruled (and then he wore the jacket right after!). In the version of this episode that exists in my head it is exactly the same but Dean gets to kill the monster while it wears John’s face.

Notable/Kickass Lines:

“I really want this to be a fresh start, you know? For the both of us.”

“Four score and seven years ago, I had a funny hat.

“Is that Gandhi? Dude, he's squirrelly.”

“Poor little Dean. All you ever wanted was to be loved by your idol. One distant father figure, coming right up.”

Laura’s (completely subjective) Episode Rating: 8.6

IMdB Rating: 8.1

6x03: The Third Man

Written by: Ben Edlund

Directed by: Robert Singer

Original air date: October 8, 2010

Plot Synopsis:

When three policemen are struck down by the plagues of Moses, the brothers investigate, calling upon Castiel. He reluctantly appears, explaining that the murders are caused by the Staff of Moses and that there's a civil war in Heaven.

Features:

Sam thirst trap, the plagues said ACAB, my best friend Cas is back, the staff of Moses, civil war in heaven, Balthazar, what souls are worth.

My Thoughts:

This episode sets up so much of the rest of the season and it does a really good job! On the other hand, really gross to watch while you eat dinner!

That one cop is a Jerry Seinfeld knockoff.

While we were watching the scene where Sam is paying the hooker, my brother-in-law said “these writers think that the only way a man could possibly satisfy a woman is if he was soulless”.

We’ve all been so busy paying attention to all the classic lines in this episode that I never even noticed the look of literal awe on Dean’s face when Cas answers his prayers. We are only in season 6! But he is in love!

I screamed out loud, “THERE’S MY BEST FRIEND” when Cas turned up on screen, so yes I’m doing fine thanks for asking.

Cas is so bitchy in this episode and I love it but it does make me sad knowing that it’s mostly out of guilt because so much of the man who would be king stuff is already happening. I love you Cas.

Also, they make such good use of his wings in this episode and I’m so sad they don’t do fast tracking shots with him zipping around more often. It’s so cool! Why wouldn’t you?? Every other shot choice is weird because Singer, but the Cas flying shots rule.

@meg3point0 pointed out that this episode is super stressful from Dean’s perspective because Cas is acting so weird what with the child torture, and Sam has been so weird because of the soul, so he came back to hunting and everyone and everything was different and he doesn’t understand why.

There are probably a million more insightful things to say about this episode but I’m tired and I still have to write two more chunks, haha.

Notable/Kickass Lines:

“Dean and I do share a more profound bond. I wasn’t gonna mention it.”

“Sam, Dean, my "people skills" are "rusty." Pardon me, but I have spent the last "year" as a multidimensional wavelength of celestial intent.”

“When a claim is made on a living soul, it leaves a mark, a brand.”

“This morning I had a ménage à -- what's French for 12?”

“The footsteps I'm following -- they're yours. What you did, stopping the big plan, the prize fight? You did more than rebel. You tore up the whole script and burned the pages for all of us. It's a new era. No rules, no destiny. Just utter and complete freedom.”

Laura’s (completely subjective) Episode Rating: 9.4

IMdB Rating: 8.2

9x01: I Think I'm Gonna Like it Here

Written by: Jeremy Carver

Directed by: John F. Showalter

Original air date: October 8, 2013

Plot Synopsis:

Sam is dying. Dean asks for help from the angels. Castiel tries to adjust to being human as the angels come after him.

Features:

Fallen angels, dying Sam’s mind-palace/forest, tractor angel, the king of hell in a trunk, Hael built the Grand Canyon.

My Thoughts:

This pre-ep montage…. It’s good shit.

Watching Dean pray in the chapel after literally just watching him pray so jokingly to Cas in The Third Man…. this is what Stacked is about. Good shit.

Also, that prayer scene coming right after Dean says “God has nothing to do with the equation” - but Cas does, Cas could fix this, he believes in him so much!

I like when angels go batshit and feral and fight each other like crazy animals. Their dad is gone and they don’t know what to do! God is an absent father is John Winchester is God! And Cas is still out here trying to teach them free will even after everything that happened in the Godstiel arc. I love him sooo much.

Hael is great accidental foreshadowing to the Casifer arc (which I actually haven’t seen yet, oops). I was going to write that she has the best halo shot in the series but that would be too disrespectful to Cas’ halo shots from The End and On the Head of a Pin.

Jackles plays desperate so well - you just know he understands how much of Dean’s identity is based around Sam when he says “there ain’t no you if there ain’t no me”. And then we’re followed by the laundry scene, where Cas has to give up his identity to survive. There could be a lesson in there somehow, if Supernatural was a more cohesive show.

WOW I was done writing this and then I remembered Bobby saying he’d be waiting for Sam in heaven with a couple of cold ones and @meg3point0 and I made horrified eye contact about the finale.

Notable/Kickass Lines:

“Cas, are you there? Sammy's hurt. He's hurt, uh – he's hurt pretty bad. And, um... I know you think that I'm pissed at you, okay? But I don't care that the angels fell. So whatever you did or didn't do, it doesn't matter, okay? We'll work it out. Please, man, I need you here.”

“Excuse me. Are you dead? Because I am.”

“I got the King of Hell in my trunk.”

“There it is. Everything inside you need to help you on your way. Go on, son. I'll be waiting for you with a couple of cold ones.”

“If I go with you... can you promise that this time it will be final? That if I'm dead, I stay dead. Nobody can reverse it, nobody can deal it away... and nobody else can get hurt because of me.”

“You got to let me help. There ain't no me if there ain't no you.”

Laura’s (completely subjective) Episode Rating: 9.0

IMdB Rating: 8.7

15x14: Last Holiday

Written by: Jeremy Adams

Directed by: Eduardo Sánchez

Original air date: October 8, 2020

Plot Synopsis:

Dean and Sam discover a wood nymph living in the bunker who is determined to protect her "family", at any cost.

Features:

Jack! Finally Jack!, Mrs. Butters, torture for the purpose of indoctrination, Dean and Jack finally talk it out, interdimensional geoscope, Jack’s birthday.

My Thoughts:

Here’s a re-enactment of what happened while watching this episode:

Jack: appears on screen

Me: begins weeping spontaneously

Can you blame me? Jack is my baby boy! My beloved! My son!

Cas had to be written out of this episode because if he saw Dean make a birthday cake for Jack he would’ve been taken by the Empty instantly.

Dean is so domestic. He likes to cook! He wears an apron! He’s bad at fixing the bunker and he wears Scooby Doo underwear!

Me and @weedsinavacantlot always joke about the bad one-off episode actors being because they ran through all the good ones in Vancouver, but the actress playing Mrs. Butters is good because you can count on your fingers the number of women over 30 that had significant roles in this show.

Can’t believe that this episode took us to the dungeon and showed us how easy it is for them to kill vampires. Untenable.

I know what I said before about Cas but if he was in this episode it would have gotten a perfect score.

Notable/Kickass Lines:

“Ignoring your trauma doesn’t make you healthy.”

“Enjoy the world you’re fighting for!”

“The only family I’ve ever really had is Sam, Dean, Cas, and uh…Mary.”

“Life gives us second chances."

“Do you still think I’m a monster?”

“Jack’s not a monster. Jack is a kid. A-A kid who – who’s gone from one tragedy in his life to another!”

Laura’s (completely subjective) Episode Rating: 9.5

IMdB Rating: 8.7

In Conclusion: First day of 4 episodes and they all slapped! If only I didn’t have to work until 6:30 and didn't end up writing these posts at 11pm.

<< Previous Day | Next Day >>

#Stackednatural #supernatural #spn #5x05 #Fallen Idols #6x03 #The Third Man #9x01 #I Think I'm Gonna Like it Here #15x14 #Last Holiday

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twiceblackvelvet · 5 years

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Can you do a Nayeon scenario where she gets drunk and it goes something like: Nayeon: I wasn’t that drunk Rest of Twice: You hit on (Y/N) the whole time Nayeon: What’s wrong with that? She’s my wife? Rest of Twice: You cried when she told you she was taken ❤️ I love you btw

A/N; i love this so much. nayeon is the right level of an annoying dork to pull off something like this. but i did decide to twist it a bit. hope you don’t mind anon. thank you for requesting!🖤

Nayeon opens her eyes to her own bedroom, thankfully, that is unfortunately way too bright for her liking. Her head ringing as a pulsation sets about destroying her temple with every second she endures the sun brightly shining through the window.

Throwing one leg over the side of the bed causes a motion sickness she definitely was not prepared for as her stomach growls loudly both from hunger and nausea. The bridge of her mouth firmly glued to her tongue as she grabs the glass of water a kind soul has left on the dresser beside the bed with what looks to be painkillers, hopefully.

Whoever decided to be a saint clearly predicted that a hangover would be on the cards, however, she herself is struggling to recall the events of the previous night. The last memory her brain is able to dredge to the forefront of her mind is convincing Jihyo that you can definitely lick your elbow if you try hard enough and have drunk enough tequila.

Her hands naturally gravitate towards your side of the bed after recalling this tidbit of information unsure if she even saw you last night. Her hand is greeted by a cold pillow only though as you’re nowhere to be found.

Usually, she’d wake up alongside you and receive some form of sympathy for her inability to know her own limits in regards to alcohol. The pain bobbling around inside her head is close to causing a breakout of tears if she doesn’t receive a hug from you soon.

After a few more seconds with no sign of you showing up, Nayeon decides the correct procedure is to investigate the house and try to figure out what exactly happened last night and where you’ve gotten off to. She stumbles out of the bed almost breaking her own neck in the process after standing on various items of clothing and shoes littering the floor.

A few steps outside of the doors and she comes face to face with three highly amused faces who not only stayed the night apparently, but also have been anticipating this moment for quite some time.

“Where’s y/n? Is she still here?” She asks anyone who would be willing to offer an answer out of her collective members currently present.

After a few glances amongst themselves, Mina decides to break the tension in the room and put Nayeon out of her own self-misery.

“Just gone to get coffee and groceries, they should be back soon don’t worry.”

Accepting that as a reasonable explanation for your absence, Nayeon joins the rest of her group around the dining table, head naturally falling into her own arms as soon as she’s seated.

“What happened last night? I don’t remember drinking nearly enough to be feeling like this.”

Once more the room falls silent as seemingly everyone mentally tries to figure out who should be the one to make today’s episode of ‘Nayeon is Hungover’ even worse for their eldest member. This time, the task falls to Jeongyeon who is way too eager to tell the story.

“You were smashed, like, the worst we’ve ever seen you by far.”

Nayeon raises her head with the force and speed capable of giving even a completely healthy person whiplash, but someone in her condition it’s made even worse as her brain once again sends a thundering bolt of pain to the forefront of her head.

“Yeah, sure. Like I’d trust you Jeong. Dahyun, please... what happened?”

A loud sigh escapes Dahyun before she begins to unravel the events.

“Well, you were downing shot after shot and we tried to get you to slow down but you wouldn’t listen.”

Finally understanding now where the headache and nausea have come from, Nayeon holds her hand up to stop Dahyun and let her know she’s heard enough.

“That’s not all, actually,”

Dahyun tries to continue but halts her words when Mina nudges her arm gently. “Don’t, she’ll only end up embarrassed and annoyed with us.”

“Don’t what?” Nayeon asks. “What happened?”

A small creak signals the door behind Nayeon has been opened and she takes that as a signal you’ve returned thus she only has a few seconds to find out if she’s done anything particularly offensive or annoying she may need to apologize to you for.

“You kept hitting on her. We tried to get you to stop but you wouldn’t drop it.” Dahyun whispers whilst motioning towards you, something you miss whilst placing the groceries into the fridge and cupboards.

A small chuckle escapes Nayeon, barely audible due to her body not allowing her to exert too much energy.

“That’s fine, we’re married guys, she’ll have loved me trying to be flirtatious, got to keep the spark alive somehow,” Nayeon smirks but quickly notices nobody else finds it humorous.

Jeongyeon’s loud hyena-like laugh breaks your concentration and lures it towards the huddled conversation in the corner of the room. You slowly walk towards the girls crowding your wife knowing they’re likely replaying her drunken antics in-depth.

“She told you she was taken and you wouldn’t stop crying, we all had to leave because the bouncers thought you were having a breakdown.”

Pushing the chair back out of shock and embarrassment, it collides with your knees as Nayeon turns around to find you bending down to rub where her seat has just assaulted you. For the second time in a twenty-four hour time span, tears begin to flow down your wife’s face.

“I’m so sorry, I can’t believe I’ve just done that or that I forgot we’re married. I’m sorry.” She begs.

Your face twists into confusion at her words as you look beyond her body for some kind of explanation from the three girls still seated, all of which shrug their shoulders.

“It’s okay, I’m not hurt. Though, I’m not quite sure what you mean about forgetting we’re married.”

The stream of water from Nayeon’s eyes dries up faster than it began as she realizes what’s happened here and slowly turns to face Mina, Jeongyeon, and Dahyun as if this were a scene from a movie and she’s just uncovered the villain’s secret plot. Dahyun is quick to hide behind the sleeves of her sweater whilst Mina and Jeongyeon struggle not to laugh.

“I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU GUYS DID THIS AGAIN!” She yells as all three break out into laughter.

A small grin replaces your previously confused expression as you twist Nayeon’s body back to face your own.

“Sorry, baby. I had to rope them into this to make you try and learn what your limits are. After all, you believed it was possible, right? Imagine if it wasn’t me you were desperately trying to take home last night.”

You wink in her face before placing a gentle kiss on her cheek and leave the room so she can allow her still hazy mind to unravel the cunning masterplan you believe you’ve hoodwinked her with. But your wife is not the smartest at the best of times, especially not when recovering from a night of heavy drinking so she’s still unsure of what is real and what is false.

“So did we flirt or not?” She hollers following after you making sure to slap Dahyun on the arm as she passes her.

For the rest of the day, you endure Nayeon’s endless questions about whether or not she did cry in the middle of a nightclub over her wife being taken by her. Never giving up the secret you’ve decided to keep even after enduring her empty threats of getting it out of you one way or another.

It is, after all, easier than explaining to her that she didn’t cry but instead turned you into a flustered disaster who needed to drag her home to stop yourself from doing something you definitely shouldn’t.

#twice #kpop #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines #kpop reactions #girl group scenarios #girl group imagines #girl group reactions #im nayeon #twice nayeon #nayeon #twice reactions #twice scenarios #twice imagines

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ppatpranss · 4 years

Text

GAYA SA PELIKULA EP. 02 Review: Let’s talk about that dinner scene.

“May nahanap ka na bang mauuwian?”

I always have this kind of fear over a series that I already liked in the first episode: a fear that the second one will not live up to it, and so will the rest. But Gaya Sa Pelikula on its second episode did not disappoint, and instead set a whole new pace that further strengthens the story it wants to tell. In this episode, you get easy banters, hilarious make-believe and intriguing fantasies, heartwarming softness, a piercing tension at every turn, that very subtle buildup of romance, and of course, that wonderful conversation on the dining table.

Early warning that I have been gushing about the dinner scene since last night, so it will take up a lot of space in this review/discussion.

[WATCH EPISODE 02 HERE]

youtube

What sets Gaya apart

Every time I watch an episode of this show and would rewatch it, I am always overwhelmed with the amount of observations I am able to write down. There are a lot of elements that make this such a good watching experience, and all of those elements just naturally come together. By this, I mean that it does not rely solely on, say, just directing or writing or acting. All of these come together, and I appreciate that you can clearly see how well-thought out everything is.

Episode 02 is a lot more free-flowing and non-structured in my opinion. Transitions feel a lot smoother this time compared to the more scene-after-scene approach of the (no less incredible) pilot episode. Because of this, I actually feel like this point is the real beginning of the story – that this sets the tone for a lot of the future events that could possibly happen between Karl and Vlad, and the people in their lives.

Personally, this is what sets Gaya apart not just among the BL series, but also in Philippine TV in general. For the longest time, we got used to stagnant or repetitive conflicts. Sometimes all the drama are injected to overwhelm the audience. But this one takes its time well. This is a show that wants to bring its audience along its every journey.

Parallels, heartbreaks, buildups

The opening scene picks up where we left off, with Ate Judit now writing a check for Karl’s rent because Vlad will stay over. She reminds Karl that while she’s a cool sister, she won’t stand for her brother getting hurt again. With this, she specifically mentioned “a boy too sweet to swat a fly” who broke his brother’s heart before.

First of all, I’m getting a sudden whiplash whenever this is brought up because I know exactly who it is. Given the first encounter of Karl with Vlad, where he saw him drunkenly dancing to a song about intense heartbreak (again, stream tyl by kakie!), it must have been something truly painful. It doesn’t help as well that there is an obvious parallel going on here with the fact that the description also fits Karl. At one point, Vlad also tells him that he does not need to worry because he looks like someone who does not have a power to hurt him anyway. They are really setting us up as early as now for the heartache, no?

In the same way, I appreciate how this show inserts the sexual attraction also forming between the two of them. Sexual attraction is a part of romance. Gaya normalizes it and emphasizes that it is just natural. The couch scene was particularly genius because of the double meanings of Karl and Vlad’s exchange. But more than that, I like how it also unapologetically shows the physical component of that attraction by having Karl and Vlad sit close together. Vlad even has his arm around Karl. Even the fact that Karl stared at Vlad when he got out of the bathroom was a nice touch.

While the One More Chance dream fantasy was all sorts of hilarious and sexy, it is a testament to how Karl’s subconscious is already telling him something that he keeps on denying. I also like the nice touch there when Karl woke up, he was just disoriented that he had a dirty dream, but not disgusted by it (there are some series and dramas that do this). He is attracted to Vlad. However, for Karl to accept his feelings, it also means that he needs to accept his sexuality. A point which was discussed primarily in the scene before this – the conversation at the dining table.

The phenomenal dinner scene

I wish I am able to give justice to this scene through words, and I’ll try because we need to talk about it (or I need to talk about it). As a fan of films and TV series, I feel like conversations are the most difficult to bring to the surface. You need to keep the audience’s attention while also making sure that the depth is there. For me, what I always look for in conversation scenes are three things: (1) how normal these conversations would sound like as if you are overhearing them from the table next to you; (2) how a director captures the rawness of the exchange between the two actors; and (3) how natural would the delivery be of each line. I think the third point is very important. Some actors have this tendency to talk in a certain kind of perky tone that makes it sound superficial. Thank goodness, both Ian and Pao were really great in this scene.

Of course, the most well-known example for a good conversation scene is the entire Before trilogy – it remains the gold standard for exhibiting the power and the magic of conversations, of an entire film with just these two people talking and forming connections. While this dinner scene isn’t exactly a Before levels type of perfection, to me it was a perfect scene in the face of BL series and the Philippines TV landscape in general.

𝗚𝗮𝘆. 𝗕𝗮𝗸𝗹𝗮. 𝗕𝗮𝘆𝗼𝘁. 𝗕𝗮𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴. 𝗝𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝘀𝗮𝘆 𝗶𝘁. 𝗜𝘁 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱𝘀 𝗻𝗼 𝗲𝘂𝗽𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗶𝘀𝗺. 𝗜𝘁’𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗻 𝗶𝗻𝘀𝘂𝗹𝘁.

One of the things best highlighted in this scene is when Karl did the gesture with his hand. That is unfortunately common in the Philippines, with people literally doing it to your face when they ask you. Or some of them done behind your back with matching giggling and knowing looks. I should know because I’ve seen it among my relatives when they try to refer to or describe a cousin or an uncle who is gay or might be gay. Karl was conditioned to think this way, and it’s no surprise that he would struggle to ask the question and get the word out. Meanwhile, Vlad is confident in his own skin. He doesn’t miss a beat and tries to get Karl to say the words in a way that both lectures him and encourages him.

This is what makes the scene purely amazing. It is confrontational, but it is not dramatic. It isn’t even preachy at all. It’s just a seemingly ordinary conversation between two people over a meal, trying to get to know and understand each other. You really got to hand it to Severo for constructing a dialogue this way because it also brings out both of Karl and Vlad’s current disposition. Moreover, this topic is a big deal and there are a lot of conversations that need to be had around it. But this scene easily summed it up around that one simple gesture. In less than a minute, it was able to tell you that being called gay, bakla, bayot, bading is not an insult. No grand monologue was needed.

Aside from that iconic exchange, I also loved the second part of it. It’s not going around much on Twitter so I can see some people reacting to the earlier exchange as if Karl was really just insulting Vlad. But the deal here is, Karl is also in the process of unlearning his bias and conditioning. He grew up in a household where his Dad would take digs against his gay uncle, Tito Santi. There’s even a hint of Tito Santi being physically hurt by his father if he’s “babakla-bakla” (basically another insulting way of saying lalambot-lambot). You can just imagine how difficult it must have been for him to grow up and feel like he needs to follow a certain path that his parents see for him.

Hence, when confronted by Vlad with the question, “Ikaw ba, bakla ka?” he was defensive. His tone shot up much higher than normal and was almost panicked. You can literally feel all of his guard come up. Vlad asked him why he was acting like he just accused him of a crime, and to his credit, Karl immediately apologized. But again, I just really understand Karl and I can’t wait for him to really see himself and get to know himself. There is so much about him that I am interested to learn and for him to learn as well about himself. I always see him as like a kid learning to take his first steps – he stumbles but tries to stand again even for just the sake of himself. His many mess-ups in life make his character compelling… and I guess this is just me on my #ProtectKarlAgenda.

Interestingly, as per Direk JP, above scene references an iconic scene from Jose Javier Reyes’ 1993 rom-com film MAY MINAMAHAL which, coincidentally, I just watched last month when I found its restored version on iWant. Amazing as well that the specific scene of them having a meal together was really my favourite from the film because it was a turning point for Carlitos (Aga Muhlach) and Monica (Aiko Melendez). It was when they finally start to get to know each other because for the longest time, they would just flirt in the cafeteria. It was a fitting reference because for Karl and Vlad, they are already starting to get to know each other by sharing even a small part of themselves. I also find it adorable watching Karl watch Vlad messily eat his food. I live for those small soft moments because it just seems so pure and innocent.

All in all, the dinner scene truly delivered. It was iconic and powerful. Major props to Gege and Direk JP, but also to both Ian and Pao. I loved how Pao was able to capture Karl’s reluctance and embarrassment, and Ian just exudes the confidence you need to see in Vlad. How can I describe this connection? Magnetic, I guess? They can easily throw these lines at each other, sustain the tension, and kind of just get lost in it. At every turn, Vlad has the power in this scene as he tries to pull Karl towards him, but also Karl stands on his own ground despite being unsure. I appreciate that about Karl – his life can be a mess, but he never really loses his sense of self and principles.

Finding a home

Aside from everything that happened in this episode, one of the things that I definitely loved is its subtle hint of these two people finding a home in each other. The most striking line for me, really, was when Karl asked Vlad, may nahanap ka na bang mauuwian? I like that this can translate to have you found a place to stay in? and have you found a place to go home to? The episode had such a great run in double meanings, and this one takes the cake more than anything. Karl was starting to feel guilty about kicking out Vlad, and it also happens that over his phone call with Tito Santi, he told him to always find a way to repay kindness with paying it forward to another person or to the community. Luckily, Vlad went back to his apartment to use the restroom.

When Vlad was about to leave, Karl called him back and asked, “Nag-dinner ka na ba?”

Vlad stayed for dinner.

When Vlad was done with dinner and was about to leave again, Karl stopped him and said, “Dito ka na lang matulog.”

Vlad stayed the night.

When Vlad was about to leave to come live with his ex-boyfriend after cooking breakfast as a thank-you, Karl offered him a place to stay, “Will you be my housemate?”

Vlad said yes and stayed.

Epilogue

In today’s epilogue, Karl is still seated on his side of the couch, but Vlad this time was standing at the back of the other side, leaning forward. A stuffed whale occupies the space beside Karl. Every now and then, the two of them would look at each other but it is Karl who would often glance back at Vlad – as to what his eyes are telling him, I don’t know. But if I am allowed to guess, perhaps he was trying to get him to sit beside him? Perhaps, as the closing note goes, there is always a space for Vlad there.

Comments; Ramblings

It’s only the second episode but Gaya is already sparking conversations and it does it in such an engaging way for its many fans. For me, this one really sets the foundation for what is yet to come for the story of Karl and Vlad. If anything, this episode emphasizes that struggle will always be a part of queer love, at least in our current socio-political climate. It isn’t just in regard to identity, but also with everything that comes with the acceptance of who you are by yourself and the Other.

For the pilot episode discussion, I talked about how there seems to be a running theme in this show about seeing – of looking at yourself, the other, or a beloved. This episode shows us Karl seeing Vlad; closely and slowly starting to unravel what it was about him that compels him. For Vlad’s part, I’m pretty sure he’s starting to see who Karl is, too. I feel like him feeling comfortable enough with the idea of staying in Karl’s place and actually living with him over the sem break is an indication of strangely feeling at ease (home?) with someone he just met.

The concept of persons as homes takes me back to a post from a Facebook page called Bibliophile, which was lifted from a poem written by Warsan Shire called ‘For Women Who Are Difficult to Love’: “You can’t make homes out of human beings. Someone should have already told you that.” This episode made me think a lot about that. On one hand, it feels romantic and uplifting to know that you have someone you can call your home, someone you can always return to as Yiu-fai put it in HAPPY TOGETHER [1997]. On the other hand, it feels scary because people change and if today the door and the windows are open, it might not be the same the next day. But I suppose I can feel hopeful for both Karl and Vlad. Perhaps, the door to Karl’s apartment will always be open for Vlad and the space beside the couch will always be reserved for him.

Gaya Sa Pelikula airs new episodes every Friday 8PM (Manila time) on Globe Studios’ Youtube channel.

GAYA SA PELIKULA Ep 01 Review [x]

#gaya sa pelikula #like in the movies #pangpang #ian pangilinan #paolo pangilinan #pinoy bl #filipino web series #filipino bl #boys love #juan miguel severo #jp habac #gsp review #owned

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orionsangel86 · 5 years

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Sam & Eileen - A Supernatural Romance.

I am quite clearly over the moon about 15x06 and Sam reunited with and bringing Eileen back from the dead. I was so over the moon in fact, that I burst into tears when Eileen stepped out of the bathtub and took Sam’s hand. That was… wow.

That was the most romantic moment in this show since 13x05 “it’s never too late” (also a return from the dead!)

So I was inspired to write an homage meta post celebrating Sam and Eileen’s romance looking back at everything canon has given us on this epic pairing.

It turns out, despite all my usual grumbling, there is still one het ship out there that I can totally get behind, and no one deserves love more than our dear Sam Winchester.

11x04 - Baby

This is where I believe the story started for Sam.

“You don’t ever want something more?”

(x)

“You know, with a hunter? Somebody who understands the life?”

This question, from Sam to his brother at the start of Season 11, has shaped so much of the subtext in the seasons following. It’s significance to the Winchesters individual development arcs, their hopes, their dreams. It blatantly spelled out for the audience what both these boys desire and what they deserve for each of their endgames.

Not a white picket fence, not the apple pie life, just something. Something that suits them. Something to share with someone else, romantically, who might fit that particular box. Let me be very clear here and stress that Sam certainly wasn’t talking about him and Dean finding that something with each other.

Dean’s journey towards finding that something has been building for even longer than this particular moment in canon, with the other stand out scene being his confession in 10x16 where he talked about having things, people, feelings, that I want to experience differently than before, or maybe even for the first time. Dean’s journey is something we have discussed at length, and as every meta writer in fandom knows all too well, it only leads in one particular direction - towards a certain dreamy blue eyed angel.

Sam’s journey has not been discussed as intensely as Dean’s, but 11x04 did lay groundwork for the writers to build upon. It hasn’t been as smooth or as obvious in the subtext as Dean’s either, with certain writing decisions appearing to come out of left field and confuse the path. But it seems that Dabb has course corrected and brought us back on track.

This episode was the first time in canon in a long time that we heard Sam textually voice his desire for a romantic relationship of some kind. I therefore immediately got excited and locked this moment away in a pocket in my heart to pull out again if ever the show would introduce a character who could fit those requirements for Sam.

The show did not disappoint.

11x11 Into the Mystic

GOD I forgot how full of delicious layers this episode was! It was written by the same writer who wrote 11x04. Robbie Thompson clearly had something in mind for Sam when he first wrote that script, and he gave it to us (and Sam) in this episode.

Eileen is introduced in 11x11 as another Hunter on a quest for vengeance - to avenge her murdered family.

It isn’t a surprise that we basically immediately shipped Eileen with Sam after this episode first aired, because her entire backstory is written to compliment Sam. Within the first 5 minutes of getting to know her, she already fulfills the requirements from Sam’s wistful speech in 11x04. She is a hunter, she is someone who understands the life. But more than that, she is all of the following:

She is on a revenge quest

She has murdered parents

She was raised by a Hunter or rather “trained” to be a Hunter rather than raised (in a scene which implies a similarly strict hunter upbringing to Sam and Dean)

She continued hunting alone after her guardian died

Her grandfather was a Man of Letters, making her a MOL Legacy, just like Sam.

Her mother was a lawyer, so she makes a joke about studying law which prompts further bonding with Sam due to his Stanford law education.

Eileen catches Sam’s eye almost immediately, and it is surprising I didn’t pick up on that on my first watch at the time, but Eileen is literally disguised as the cleaner in order to go unnoticed. Sam had no reason to be suspicious of her, and I think at the time we all assumed that he just wanted to question a potential witness - but even so, there was no need to interrupt Mildred to go speak to her. Could Sam’s distraction have been a bit more than strictly professional? In hindsight I’m gonna go with YES.

Their next meet is cute simply because by this point the audience is misled to think that she is actually the banshee. The ominous music tones, the shots of Eileen watching the Winchesters from a window. We believe that she is the villain, and then when she uses magic to pin Sam and comes at him with a dagger it’s practically a romantic trope used in enemies to lovers fics. A case of mistaken identity (another trope) and Sam and Eileen are able to reveal each of their truths. They bond immediately with both Sam and the audience learning all of the above. the checklist requirements indicating their compatibility is so blatantly obvious its almost too on the nose. But then het romance always seems that way doesn’t it?

The real kicker in this episode that made my heart sing at the time was this:

“Feel free to drop me a line if you ever need anything. Or even if you just wanna hang out”

“you can’t call me though, I mean you could call but I won’t answer.”

(x)

FIRST OF ALL - HOW DARE YOU KILL ME WITH FEELS SAMMY OVER THAT GORGEOUS SMILE

Sam’s line here though was SUCH A LINE. “Or even if you just wanna hang out”

I see you Sam Winchester. Hoping for Netflix and Chill right? I know you have Netflix. You gave Cas your password. :P

This little interaction at the end of this episode was pure flirtation and it was gorgeous to watch (and to rewatch, with hindsight, knowing what happens in 15x06 to totally deepen their relationship. Urgh. I guess I really am a sucker for a good old fashioned Supernatural Love Story!)

The other big takeaway from this episode is that meeting Eileen rejuvenated Sam. He starts the episode unable to sleep, haunted by his Lucifer trauma and feeling so down and broody that Dean steps in constantly to ask if he’s okay and try to engage in talking about feelings (always a bad sign for a Winchester to get to the point where they feel they need to ask the other to talk about feelings!)

But the end of the episode marks a significant change in Sam. He smiles, he opens up to Dean, he textually states that the case helped him. He opens up a keepsake box (that we never knew he had before this episode) and puts the retirement homes leaflet in there - an indication that he actually has hope that he might live to see a happy retirement (a wonderful sign for someone who just 40 minutes ago was acting like a total nihilist.)

The case alone wasn’t some spectacular revelation, so what else could have possibly caused Sam’s change of heart? The answer is obvious. Eileen did. She acted like a beacon of light this episode for Sam, and in a perfect bookend to how the episode opened, Sam curls up in bed, turns off his light, and is able to sleep. It is only Dean who spends the night restless and haunted.

This was the first time that Eileen acted as a “win” for Sam just by meeting him.

Unfortunately, we don’t meet Eileen again until a whole season later in

12x17 - The British Invasion

This episode is a far cry away from 11x11′s layered genius. Messy, overly plot heavy, too many various character stories causing mental whiplash, too much focus on unnecessary side characters, LUCIFER existing in general, an unnecessary sex scene between Mary and Ketch (eww), a bloody death scene, and moments of utter stupidity from the lead characters.

In other words it’s a CLASSIC BUCKLEMING.

Do yourselves a favour and if you ARE planning on re-watching this episode, just skip to the parts with Dean, Sam and Eileen (the Dagon and Kelly stuff is relatively good as well - the rest is utter garbage).

Anyway, pushing aside my hatred for the terrible duo for a moment, I will say that as per usual, what they lack in subtlety and intelligent subtextual layering, they make up for with a sledge hammer to the face in terms of trying to get a point across. So when it comes to Saileen in this episode, well, it might as well be canon already.

Practically every time Sam and Eileen interact in this episode, they are framed as a flirtatious couple in the early tentative stages. The smiles and playful flirting, the smirks when one does something to make the other proud. It is very clear, even if it is still technically subtextual, that both Jared and Shoshannah are playing this like these characters are attracted to one another, and are building on that relationship.

Hell, even Dean teases Sam twice about Eileen in this episode (though once was in a deleted scene that they should have kept instead of the Lucifer crap):

(x)

What we also find out from this opening scene, is that Sam and Eileen have been communicating off screen since 11x11. It is textually confirmed that the two of them have been developing their relationship previously, and we just haven’t seen it. Did Eileen visit the Bunker previously? Because she certainly seemed comfortable there this episode. Have her and Sam cuddled up to watch movies previously? (We know another pairing that textually do this even though we’ve never seen it on screen - Dean and Cas). Dean feels comfortable enough to tease his little brother in that playful typical sibling way, so clearly Eileen at this point has become a more frequent character in Sam’s life. It’s just a shame we as the audience have never seen anything of it until this episode.

This episode might be the first time we have seen her again since her introduction, but it certainly isn’t the first time Sam has seen her since. This is canon.

The rest of this episode continues this theme of displaying with zero subtlety that Sam and Eileen have something more than friendship. One of the easiest ways to truly see the effect of this is just watching Sam in scenes with her compared to Sam at any other time. Like in 11x11, Eileen manages to light Sam up and have him grinning like a puppydog. It’s kind of adorable and also quite shocking when you realise how rare it is to see Sam smile (or any of the characters in this angstfest of a TV show for that matter.)

Just look at the above cheesy smile in the car scene. Look at Sam’s bashful face here when Dean teases him in front of his girl:

(x)

Look at this smug face when Eileen snaps back at the irritating guy:

(x)

Jared hits every mark playing a loved up Sam Winchester.

By the end of this episode, a tragedy strikes and Eileen is scared off. Their relationship here ends on a comforting hug, because meaningful relationships in this show are almost always first signified with comforting hugs following traumatic events, and tentative hand holding.

The way he strokes her hair gently is just SO touching and intimate.

(x)

When all is said and done Eileen leaves, terrified of the British Men of Letters. When Dean asks Sam where she was, he tells him she went back to Ireland, and Sam looks so dejected at that thought. I don’t see how anyone can possibly read his reactions towards Eileen as anything other than romantic affection.

As a bonus point - I will mention that due to Bucklemings sledgehammer approach, it is quite clear that Eileen plays a Cas mirror in this episode. All of her scenes with Sam are paired off against Dean who spends this entire episode trying and failing to get hold of Castiel. In the Winchester’s final scene, Sam greets Dean in the morning and immediately asks his brother about Cas. Sam does this a lot in season 12, because Dean’s concern for Cas is present throughout every episode in which he is absent. Dean admits he is worried, but changes the subject, instead asking Sam about Eileen (note that it is the next morning so Dean assumed she had stayed the night).

Both brothers revert to the other when it comes to their respective partners. Sam leaves it up to Dean to contact and worry about Cas, and Dean does the same with Sam about Eileen. By this being a common pattern throughout pretty much all of Carver/Dabb eras, both brothers subtextually acknowledge that they each have a strong emotional connection with their respective potential romantic partners and therefore any contact or communication about each partner must come from the brother closest.

12x21 - There’s Something About Mary

Another Buckleming episode and the less said about this one the better. I won’t even mention the extremely insulting and inappropriate way to kill off a disabled character (almost as bad as killing off a lesbian by having nazis butcher her) I also won’t comment on the letter that Eileen sent Sam which whilst it did have romantic undertones, was clearly written by a 12 year old girl and did not marry with Eileen’s character at all (Eugenie showing her misogyny again).

The one good thing that came out of this episode (the only good thing) was Jared’s understated grief over Eileen’s death.

(x)

His performance dealing with her death in this episode was beautiful. It was understated, but clearly portrayed as heartbreaking. Unfortunately Sam had to push it down and bottle it up.

Eileen’s death was a huge shocker to us all as it didn’t make any sense at that point to cut short a story that seemed so clearly to be on a specific trajectory. We often talk about how Eileen’s romance with Sam at the time was tied to Dean and Cas, and that their relationship paralleled Dean and Cas’s in the narrative. This is all true, especially the death of Eileen coming as foreshadowing for the death of Castiel at series end. Just looking at that above gif of Sam where he looks at her corpse bears an extreme resemblance to Dean pulling back the sheet and looking down at a dead Castiel in 13x01.

However much I squee and love that these relationships are clear mirrors of each other though, I need to stress how Saileen, how Sam and Eileen’s canon relationship, is so much more than that. They may have mirrored Destiel, but they are also totally different, on a different course, and with a totally different backstory. Eileen doesn’t exist just to give Sam his own version of Cas to run off with. She is not there just to push up a separate ship. Sam and Eileen’s romance stands alone in this story. It may mirror DeanCas at times, but its purpose is not for DeanCas. It’s purpose is for Sam and Eileen.

Right from the start she ticked all of Sam’s boxes, and the clear attraction between them made it obvious. Yet Eileen was not written to just be a love interest either. She is an ally, a capable hunter, who is written deeply, with her own trauma’s and tragic past. Yet she keeps fighting, all whilst owning her disability and making it work for her rather than hold her back. She is hardly a Lisa, or an Amelia, both of whom had zero depth of character and were more or less written to look pretty and concerned as the Winchester boys basically treated them terribly. Eileen stands out as an individual character far beyond her relationship with Sam. She was full of potential which is why her quick death was an absolute travesty.

Eileen should not have been killed off. I believe even the writers are well aware of that, and this is why they brought her back.

Which brings me to:

15x06 - Golden Time

We knew long before this episode aired that Eileen would be back as Dabb revealed her return at SDCC. He made comments at the time ensuring that any characters he brought back would not be fanservice, that they would be characters chosen because the writers felt their stories ended too quickly, and that they had more stories to tell. Something I believe that DabbBerens are doing in particular in this season is righting the wrongs of the past. Eileen’s death was a clear “wrong” and I think its highly likely that DabbBerens’ were aware of this and saw Eileen as a no-brainer to bring back. As I said at the start of this post, Dabb is course correcting, getting his endgame plans back on track, and ensuring that he hits certain markers in order to do that.

Once again, we are at a place in the story where Sam is grieving, and suffering deeply from all of the loss and trauma that he has faced. Being God’s personal puppet, losing his mother, losing his son, and losing someone he was close to in Rowena by his own hand, has left him in a dark place. Sam’s arc in early season 15 plays out very similarly to Dean’s arc in early season 13. A Winchester in desperate need of a win.

Eileen was Sam’s win in this episode.

Given the time that has passed since Eileen’s last episode, and how the narrative has progressed since then, I was worried that Eileen’s return would seem like fan service, and would therefore fall flat (I felt this way with AU!Charlie and never warmed to the character because of it). I was also worried that whatever potential relationship might have been building between her and Sam in seasons 11 and 12 might not have shone through in this episode. But thankfully the writers played it pretty damn perfectly and Eileen’s return wasn’t just a small side plot to an otherwise jam packed episode (like Kevin’s return in 15x02). No, her story was the A plot as Sam devoted himself to finding a way to save her from a terrible fate.

My concerns about their potential romantic relationship not being played as it was in 12x17 were also completely unfounded. From the moment Sam saw Eileen’s ghost whilst on a jog the romance was immediately back and I have no doubt that Jared and Shoshannah are once again fully playing up the connection and romantic attraction between the two.

I am so convinced of the romance being put across here, and I want you to see why I adore this so much (in case you don’t already see it). So here are my biggest and most important takeaways from Eileen and Sam’s scenes in this episode and WHY I feel these stand out as significant elements towards proving the writers intentions for this to be an endgame canon relationship:

1. Aside from the obvious similarities between Sam and Eileen that were written into 11x11 in order to ensure that Eileen was able to stand as Sam’s equal, the one other thing that we have long discussed that Sam needs in a partner is someone who at least somewhat understands the trauma and pain that he has experienced in his life. Sam has predominantly bonded with people via shared trauma. Before her death, Eileen had had her fair share of traumatic experiences growing up in the tough hunter lifestyle, but spending an eternity being tortured in Hell is a different level of trauma entirely.

This episode cleverly once again elevated Eileen to the same level as Sam. They are equals now, both through good and bad experiences. Eileen was dragged to Hell, and only escaped when Chuck released the souls. Given that 1 year on Earth is 100 years in Hell, this means that Eileen was in Hell for 250 years give or take. Her trauma, her pain over this, is something that she can’t talk about just yet, but this significant connection between her and Sam was textualised clearly:

SAM: “I’ve been there too. Hell… long time ago. You try and forget but it gets inside you. Talking helps.”

EILEEN: “I can’t. not yet.”

SAM: “I understand”

And he really does. It is something that we can argue is a shared suffering that can create a (forgive me for this) profound bond between two people. The only other people who can understand just what he has been through were Dean (via years of Hell torture), Cas (via shared Lucifer possession), and Rowena (via shared Lucifer torture). Eileen now makes that very small list.

2. The other big factor that this episode made clear to point out textually was that this is not a Chuck manipulation. This really is Eileen, and her return from death is not part of Chuck’s story:

SAM: “Rowena got it, she didn’t know the details but she knew the game was rigged so this. Magic. This is how she kept control.”

The reason I do not believe that Eileen is part of Chuck’s manipulations is this very pointed line right here about Rowena. Along with many other things in this episode that indicate that it isn’t guided by Chuck, Sam specifically clarifies that Rowena used magic to maintain control over her own universe.

Whilst I fully believe that Rowena will be coming back as Queen of Hell (because whatever happens to Heaven and Hell at the end, they will need balance, and someone to play caretaker and Rowena has just been set up for this role far too perfectly for me not to at least consider the option), this episode so beautifully respects and honours her character, to the point that Rowena, even in her absence, is able to control and play architect to all that happens. Rowena effectively is given Chuck’s role over this particular narrative, but instead of being framed as something villainous, it is portrayed as a precious gift that she has given to her protege Sam.

Rowena rigged the system for herself, as Sam textually explains. Her use of magic, was her way of escaping Chuck’s control, and it is through Rowena that Sam is also given this power. The power to bring back someone he loves - who was most likely taken from him by Chuck’s own dark and poorly written story (yes I do believe that Meredith was throwing shade at Buckleming in the deep subtext - pretty much all the other writers do this all the time if you pay close enough attention :P)

Rowena’s journey from villain, to reluctant ally, to friend and then finally to family, is one of the most beautiful and epic journey’s on the show (rivalled only by Castiel in my opinion). She remains one of my all time favourite characters, and her tribute in this episode, that even after death she could bestow such a precious gift to Sam, is one that I think will remain one of the more touching stories this show has given us. This is yet another reason why I believe that Sam and Eileen are endgame. Because it is a gift from Rowena, and I believe it is a gift that will be honoured by the writers.

3. It’s a small moment, but it is IMPORTANT. Sam confirms that he was teaching himself ASL after he met Eileen. In a moment of adorable flirtation Eileen beams at him and a bashful Sam smiles and bounces on the spot like a giddy schoolboy. This is yet another reveal of moments in the lives of the Winchesters that we just don’t see in 40 minute episodes. That it is canon that Sam spent hours of his life teaching himself ASL so he could more effectively communicate with Eileen is so precious. There is no way to argue how much she meant to him.

But it isn’t just evidence of Sam’s affections, it proves to be a useful tool to the hunt in this episode as well. When Sam is unable to speak due to the witches curse, he is instead able to sign “My brother” to Eileen so that she knows to go and get Dean. It is Sam’s knowledge of sign language, which he learned due to his affection and interest in Eileen, that saves his life in this episode.

One point that I HAVE to mention here is how the writers gave so much thought to their depiction of Eileen as a deaf person, and how wonderful her return is as representation for deaf and hard of hearing people everywhere. In both this episode, and also in her first episode 11x11, her disability was not treated as a set back, but as a tool that enables her to get ahead. The only time the writing displayed an insulting and frankly ableist light was Bucklemings 12x21 which isn’t really surprising. We expect such things from Buckleming. The other writers have proven how much more compassionate and caring they are.

The idea that Sam Winchester could end up falling in love with a beautiful, deaf woman in Eileen is practically unheard of in TV media. When do the protagonists ever end up with anyone less than “TV perfect”? It is groundbreaking that Supernatural in it’s 15 seasons has grown so much and come so far. That it started with the fridging of two women, that it’s cast remained predominantly white men throughout its entire run, that it was blackened by excessive misogyny in its early days, as well as ableism via the treatment of Bobby Singer’s paralysis in season 5.

Supernatural has faced heavy criticism throughout it’s run, but it seems like the writers have listened and are learning. By allowing Sam and Eileen to have a happy endgame, they are doing a wonderful service in truly putting this show on the map for progression and representation - They just need to make sure that they follow through on that other big important thing too…

4. Rebirth and new beginnings. I am reminded of 13x05 and the brilliant Steppenwolf song “It’s Never Too Late To Start Again” as I rewatch the bathroom scene for the hundredth time. If the rest of the episode hasn’t already had you crying out how desperately these two should be together I fully believe it was Meredith’s plan (along with the entire production crew and Shoshannah and Jared), to have us all bawling our eyes out in happy tears that Sam and Eileen get to be together now!! (well, I certainly cried. A lot. and ruined my mascara. and squeaked at such a high pitch only dogs could hear me. The only other time I have had that reaction was in 13x05… oh, and 12x19. It’s RARE okay!)

I think the most significant point here is the touching of hands, which calls back to an earlier painful moment in the episode when ghost Eileen reached out to try to comfort Sam as he despaired about being a cosmic joke, and found she wasn’t even able to touch him.

It is a romantic trope that was most famously used in the film Ghost, where touch was a big part of the on screen relationship. Supernatural displays this same trope rather perfectly here when the big win of the episode takes place, and Eileen emerges from the bathtub alive and whole, and tentatively reaches out to take Sam’s hand again with vastly different results.

(x)

Sam is so hesitant to touch her back, so fearful that this isn’t real, that he isn’t being allowed this. The overwhelming sense of relief and warmth that radiates from him when he finally does take her hand was exactly what made me burst into tears. The moment is so extremely breathtaking, so intimate and touching that your heart just aches for them to have that happy ending. It’s rare that Supernatural gives us moments like this, but when it does give them, when it allows its characters a win, they are immediately memorable and stand out as bright spots in an otherwise dark show. It’s moments like this that make watching these characters suffer so much worth it in the end.

The hug that comes after the touching of hands is just as intimate. This is portrayed as a lifeline. Something for Sam to grasp onto and breath. Something that inspires him to change his outlook, to gather his determination, and to convince his brother to join him and fight for the happy ending that both of these boys so desperately deserve.

(x)

The entire bathroom scene was a testament to how well Supernatural can work romance into its narrative. How these talented creators can easily provide us with a romantic scene to tug on our heart strings. Anyone screaming that romance doesn’t belong in this show I will now point at this scene and tell them exactly how wrong they are. This scene is EXACTLY what this show needed.

For anyone denying the romance here (yeah funny how the bronly’s are so anti Saileen - I wonder why...) I’ll spell it out for them:

This is how you set up a romantic scene in TV Production:

1. Candlelight. Check.

2. Soft focus (dates back to the 1930s when films would use soft focus to portray the dreamy emotional uplift of happy couples in love - see Meet Me In Saint Louis for a very clear example). It is almost always considered a filming technique to portray romance. Check.

3. Chivalry. As if any of us didn’t expect Sam to be a perfect gentleman! But the fact is that the way he turns his back and waits with bated breath to see if the spell had worked is shown as anything other than platonic. He is almost shy, knowing that if and when she emerges from the water she will be naked, but he turns to preserve her dignity. Check.

4. Leading on from that, this is literally a naked woman emerging from a bathtub whilst Sam awkwardly stands in the room. It could have been highly sexualised. They could have used that god awful 70s porno music they like so much in this show. Sam could have made a joke to dispel the tension. If this was a platonic friendship, any of these things would have given it away. The fact that none of this happened, that the scene remained tense and intimate but not overly sexualised only further validates the romantic reading. I mean LOOK AT THIS:

CHECK

5. The music. Music is such an important part in any story. It always plays a vital role in signifying the correct atmosphere, and the correct tone of a scene. We talk about music a lot in relation to Dean and Cas and the sweeping melodic notes that usually compliment any heightened emotional DeanCas scene. The music during THIS scene though? Well it was beautifully romantic in every way. If in doubt, just go back and listen to it with your eyes closed. Play this music track over another random scene of two people sharing a moment, and it will make the scene read as romantic. I guarantee it.

CHECK AND MATE.

Overall, this episode was the most romantic and most intimate Sam and Eileen have ever got yet in canon. It is a clear indication that their relationship is heading in a positive direction. I couldn’t be happier with how the writers are portraying this and am jumping for joy at the thought that Sam might actually get what he desired all those years ago during 11x04 when he tried to bring up the topic to Dean in the Impala.

We know from promo photos, that Eileen is still staying with Sam in 15x07. That she comforts him. With images like this to go on:

I’d say with some confidence that we will get to further watch their relationship grow, and I couldn’t be more excited for it.

I fully expect there to be darker moments coming up, and potentially Eileen will be sent away for a period of time (my money is on Chuck “dusting” her the way he did with Becky in 15x04 because I don’t believe that kills people and I do believe that they can be brought back from wherever he sends them too - plus “dusting” makes me think of Avengers Endgame which I find amusing because the “dusted” all returned at the end. I wouldn’t be surprised if Supernatural played around with that as it so often likes to play with pop culture references). I think that post Mid Season Finale we will be back to a period of utter loss and despair for the Winchester boys, and that therefore those who they feel strongly for (aka Cas and Eileen) will have to be separated from them.

However, the point is that it is always darkest before the dawn. In this story, 15x06 has laid the groundwork for Eileen to be Sam’s romantic endgame. It’s now up to Sam, and Eileen, to make sure they fight to get what they both so desire.

Bring on the finale show.

(If you liked this meta run through of Sam and Eileen’s building relationship, please leave a comment for me. It took forever to complete! Also, please click the links under the gifs and go give the gifmakers some love! The gifsets I have used are all wonderful and deserve your reblogs. (Gifs that don’t have links are my own)).

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edendaphne · 6 years

Photo

As promised, some angst starring Chat!Felix and Marinette (using some of the earlier concept art/designs)

Note: I'd been working on this oneshot and illustrations since before the most recent season 3 spoilers were released (the ones with episode titles and synopses) so everything in here is strictly an AU.

You can also read it here on Ao3

"I’m in love with you, Felix."

Felix stared at Marinette for a few seconds, then scoffed. He didn't have time for this today; he was planning his own love confession to Ladybug tonight and he didn’t appreciate any unnecessary distractions. Marinette’s abrupt declaration of love was merely one of numerous others he had received; call it another curse he was inflicted with, although this one wasn’t of magical origin like his ring.

"You don’t love me, Marinette," he snorted. "You love what I represent. Fame, money, fashion. You think you can get a taste of those things through me.” Looking away, he added, “Just like all the others."

Marinette faltered, "Th-that’s not true! I like you for you, not just because you’re an Agreste!"

"Is that so?" He replied sarcastically. "How could you? You don’t even know me,” he spat, words dripping with unveiled disdain.

Gathering as much determination she could, Marinette argued, "But I do! I’ve noticed things that you try to hide from others. You’re always very reserved and serious on the outside, but I know that inside you’re actually a very warm and loving person." She added a bit more quietly, "I know that you act a certain way because you’re afraid of being vulnerable, of letting people in and getting hurt, just like you’ve been hurt in the past."

Felix glared down at her from his height. "So you’ve been studying me? I don’t appreciate being psychoanalyzed, Marinette."

"No, that isn’t—! I didn’t—!" she stuttered, panicking on the inside, desperately fighting the urge to run away or hide, anything to escape from his judgmental gaze. "I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry or upset you! I just want to understand you and figure out—"

"Figure out what?” He interrupted. “How to impress me? How to talk or what to wear to make me notice you? Have you ever taken the time to actually get to know me?"

Marinette recoiled and curled in on herself, the sting of his words chipping away at her heart. "That isn’t it! You say I don’t know you at all, but you never accept my invitations to go on activities or dates! How can I get to know you better if you won’t give me a chance?"

"Maybe I don’t want to give you a chance. Have you ever considered that maybe I just want to be left alone?" He crossed his arms and said with finality, "Stop hounding me, Marinette. I can’t stand groupies."

Marinette gasped in disbelief. Bristling at being called a groupie, her stomach churned unpleasantly, suddenly feeling the need to throw up. With her voice as even as she could muster, she uttered quietly, almost whispering, “R-right. As you wish. I won’t bother you anymore, I promise.” She turned away from him, hoping she could force one foot in front of the other despite the sudden feeling of lightheadedness. “Take care of yourself, Felix. Goodbye.”

Felix sighed heavily in frustration as she walked away. He could have sworn he heard sniffling, but it must’ve just been his imagination.

Hours later after dark, Felix ran across the rooftops as Chat Noir, getting some light exercise before his patrol with Ladybug and, if he were to be completely honest with himself, to get away from his stuffy mansion. He paused on top of the bakery by the school, enjoying the delightful smells of foods he didn't allow himself to partake in, when he heard Marinette tearfully talking on the phone. That was odd. Why would she be crying at this hour?

“No… I’m not okay, but I will be eventually. It'll just take time.” She sighed. “A lot of time." She paused, listening to the other side. "No… no, please don’t confront him. He made it pretty clear that he doesn’t want anything to do with me and I’m going to respect that."

Chat Noir became rooted to the spot. She was talking about Felix, about him, and the confession from earlier.

Marinette sighed and resumed tearfully, "Maybe he’s right. Maybe I really don't know him at all. Maybe I’ve just deluded myself all this time because I thought I understood him a little. Oh, how could I have messed this up so badly? I should never have confessed! …At least I know what he really thinks of me now. I’ve never seen him look at me that way, like I was the scum of the earth, like-" she choked down a sob. "Like I was lower than dirt! Like he hated me!"

Chat’s heart dropped and he felt like he’d been dropped into a tub of ice water. Had his words really affected her that much? He didn’t actually hate Marinette. She was a genuinely nice person, always helpful and cheerful, if a bit scatterbrained and lacking in punctuality. Still, the guilt settled uncomfortably in his gut and he felt slightly dizzy, his hands clammy underneath the suit. Part of him wanted to leave so he wouldn’t have to endure hearing the rest of this conversation, but another part deep within knew he deserved the torture of hearing how much he'd hurt her.

There was another pause as Marinette continued to sob. "No… I'm giving up on him. Maybe even giving up on love altogether. This kind of pain isn't worth it." She went quiet for a few moments, then replied, "Yeah, you're right. Thanks for checking up on me, Alya. You're the best… Yeah, I'll keep in touch… Sure... Love you too. Bye."

Flabbergasted, Chat Noir still couldn’t force himself to leave the balcony. Overhearing (okay, eavesdropping) this discussion had shaken him to his core. Marinette had been honest with him earlier. Her confession was authentic and heartfelt. And not only did she care about him, but she’d also been able to see past his aloof and unfriendly demeanor that he’d used as a shield from the world ever since he was a child. For as long as he could remember, he’d given up on trying to be understood, and Marinette was the only one that had ever even attempted to do so.

Choking back a hard, uncomfortable lump in his throat, he shook his head and stood up. He needed to calm his nerves before his meeting with Ladybug, so he attempted to convince himself that his actions were entirely justified. He couldn’t help the way he felt. He didn’t like Marinette the way she apparently felt for him. Maybe he could have been more kind in his rejection but that wasn’t who he was. Felix wasn’t a nice person like her. And Marinette was resilient. She’d get over it. She’d forget him. And eventually she’d find herself a person who was her type and would suit her better. It was never meant to be.

He ignored the large, empty pit in his stomach and with these thoughts in mind, he sprinted away into the night, blending in with the darkness where he belonged.

“I’m in love with you, Ladybug.”

Ladybug widened her eyes incredulously, staring first at Chat Noir, then at the ruby red rose he was holding. She felt prickles at the back of her neck, dreading a conversation she’d hoped she would never have to have again, much less within the same day.

She pinched the bridge of her nose and suppressed a groan. Chat Noir theatrically professed his so-called affections for her just about every other week, and this time was no different. She simply wasn’t up for any teasing this night.

“Chat, can we stop with the shenanigans today? I’m really not in the mood. In fact, I almost called off tonight’s patrol.” At his questioning look, she elaborated, “Earlier today I got rejected by the guy I like and he… he didn't let me down gently." She turned away, trying desperately to even her breathing and blink away tears lest she open the floodgates again.

Chat took a step forward and took her hand, stating dramatically, “Who could have possibly been so cruel to you, My Queen? Surely they must be blind or idiotic to reject an extraordinary creature such as yourself.”

She scoffed through her nose. “He certainly didn’t seem to think I’m so extraordinary.”

Chat’s mouth widened into his trademark Cheshire grin and he replied with a flourish, “It’s a good thing I’m here then, for I’ll sing your praises far and wide all over France, letting everyone know of my adoration for you.”

Ladybug huffed incredulously, taking her hand away, her voice trembling as she snapped at him, “Chat, don’t. Don’t do this to me. Not today. Not after what happened to me earlier. Can’t you be more sensitive to my feelings and stop being so damn pushy?” After a long pause she took a deep breath and continued, “You don't love me, Chat. You… ‘you love what I represent.’”

Chat’s eyes grew wide as saucers, feeling a strong sense of déjà vu that was too close to be mere coincidence.

This can’t be… No, it couldn’t be, it just couldn’t. There’s no way fate would be this cruel.

Pushing the intruding thought aside, he argued, “But Ladybug, I do love you! I’ve loved you from the moment we met!”

Ladybug let out a small scoff. “Chat. We both know that’s a lie.” A few moments passed and she stated bluntly, “I know about your curse.”

Chat’s mouth dropped open slightly upon hearing her revelation, feeling something akin to whiplash. She knows, he thought. But how?

“You just want to use me. You always have.” Ladybug declared hotly. “Well, I'm not going to fall for it! They’re lies, all of it! Never in our entire partnership have you been honest with me.” She looked up at him and the tears finally started flowing. “You couldn’t care less about me,” she seethed.

This conversation was quickly spiraling out of his control. Desperately, Chat argued, “You know that’s not true! I do care about you!”

“Oh, please,” she dismissed him bitterly as the tears fell. “You only care about yourself. All you’ve ever wanted from me was a kiss to break the curse from your miraculous, and then you’d toss me away when you didn’t need me anymore. If you had just asked me then I’d understand, but you couldn’t even be forthright with me about it... After all we’ve been through together, don’t you think I deserve at least that?” She squeezed her eyes shut, body shaking.

Chat felt his insides crumple and it was like his body was free falling. Despite Ladybug being correct in her assumption that he didn’t start their partnership with the purest intentions, he had sincerely grown to fall deeply, irrevocably in love with her. Did she really, earnestly think he didn’t care about her at all after all this time?

“Ladybug, you have to believe me, that’s not how it is!” he insisted. “You’re the love of my life! You’re everything I could ever need!” Ladybug countered sharply, “But what about me, Chat? How about what I need?”

Chat replied quickly, “I’d give you anything you could ever possibly want! Anything you wish for would be yours.”

Feebly, she replied, “I don’t even know what I want anymore.” She muttered, aside, “Maybe Felix was right. Maybe none of us truly know each other.”

Chat Noir paled. This couldn’t be happening. All this time, right in front of him. The compassionate, thoughtful, ingenious, most important person in his life. And he’d been too blind, his soul too bitter to notice her. Thinking of it now, there was no real difference between the way the two of them acted, save a bit more confidence and outspokenness as Ladybug. The same couldn’t be said about him though. His outgoing and theatrical Chat Noir persona was the complete opposite of everything Felix was behind the mask. There was no way she could have guessed that they were one and the same. He, however, had no excuse. It should have been obvious. But Ladybug was right. He was selfish. And he’d been dishonest. Not only that, but his heartless, cruel treatment of Marinette had ruined any possible chances he may have had with her. She truly was extraordinary and he was just…

I’m an asshole, he realized.

The pain etched on her face, the red and puffy eyes that were visible despite her wearing a mask, none of it belonged there. She deserved nothing but happiness but she was the one suffering. Because of him.

He inhaled sharply as a flood of memories flashed through his mind of all the times when harsh words were directed at him, memories of his younger self hiding inside a closet, sobbing, desperately wishing for even the smallest amount of love and warmth. Until eventually, years later after countless heartbreaks and disappointments, he’d finally adapted and became numb to it. And while this defense mechanism helped him to protect his own heart, it had also rendered him uncaring and indifferent towards others. It was only recently, due to Ladybug’s kindness and influence, that Felix was slowly beginning to learn how to feel again (although admittedly he was still pretty lousy at it, as his current situation could attest to).

Ladybug sniffled and suddenly paused, as if a thought had just occurred to her. She steeled herself, resolve filled her face and she took a few rapid steps forward Chat Noir until their bodies were almost touching. She placed a hand on his chest and looked up at him, and yet her eyes looked hollow and dispirited. Her other hand moved to gently cup his jaw, then she closed her eyes and closed the remaining distance between them.

As she leaned in, Chat panicked. "W-what are you doing?!"

"Giving you what you want," she said and puckered her lips.

He pulled his head back and she opened her eyes, revealing a now agitated look. Chat took a few steps backwards hoping to get some distance between them but she followed, never letting go of him, until he backed up against a wall and had nowhere left to go. She pinned him against it roughly, using both hands, holding him still enough for her to kiss.

“L-Ladybug, wait!” he stammered. “Don’t do this! You can’t!”

Exasperated, she cried, “Don’t you want to be free from the burden of being Chat Noir? You’d never have to see me again. That’s what you want, isn’t it? Your freedom?” she spat. “One kiss and you could get rid of all this, and we can stop this game. You don’t love me and maybe I’ll never be loved like I want to be, but I can free you from this curse. And from me.”

At that instant he did something he never believed he would ever do: he pushed her away. He couldn’t accept her kiss. Not like this. This wasn’t like her. She was hurting and lashing out and asking for help all at once. This wasn’t how he wanted to end his time as Chat Noir. It couldn’t end like this.

“Ladybug, listen to me!” he pleaded, holding her firmly by her upper arms. “I don’t want this and I know you don’t want this! I can’t let you do it! You mean so much more to me than this!”

She squirmed in his grip. “I don’t believe you!!” she shouted, barely able to see him through her watery eyes.

Not letting go, Chat replied quietly, “I don’t blame you. I really don’t. I haven’t been a good partner to you; I’ve been deceitful and crass, and I’m sure someone else could do a better job at being Chat Noir. It may not come as a surprise to you that I’m not a good person in real life. In fact, I’m pretty damn horrible.” He gave a humorless chuckle.

Ladybug ceased her struggling and looked up at him in confusion.

Chat continued, “But I believe that we’re together for a reason and I don’t want to give up. I’d like to stay with you and continue to fight alongside you. I want to protect you, to destroy anything that would dare try to hurt you… But if that someone is me, then…” He tightly squeezed his eyes shut. “If you really don’t want me here then I can leave. I can leave you alone and I promise I wouldn’t bother you anymore.” He looked at her pleadingly, eyes glistening. “But if you would have me, if you would tolerate me, then I would stay with you forever. I promise.”

Through his hastened speech, Ladybug stared at him, wide eyed and full of disbelief, but as he reached the end, she broke.

Gasping and staring, a horrified Ladybug cried remorsefully, “Chat… Oh, Chat, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!” She sobbed openly, not even attempting to suppress it. Chat gingerly pulled her close, gathering her into his arms. She trembled and heavy sobs violently racked her small body. He held her, soothed her, whispered to her, stroking the back of her head gently, careful so that his claws wouldn’t snag on her soft, raven hair. They stayed that way for a long time, clinging to each other like a lifeline.

An hour later, Ladybug and Chat Noir sat on the roof side-by-side, legs and hips touching. Chat's arm draped loosely around her shoulders and his thumb stroked against her upper arm, while Ladybug rested her head on his chest seeking comfort. The two sat in companionable silence; Ladybug’s crying had finally stopped and she was exhausted. Her breathing had slowed considerably and Chat wondered if she’d fallen asleep. He wished vehemently that they could stay like this forever, but they had school the next day and Felix had a very long apology to prepare, so it was time to part ways.

Chat gently nudged Ladybug’s shoulder and she stirred slightly. “Are you awake, Choupinette?”

“Hmmm…” she sighed airily and nuzzled into him. “Barely.”

He chuckled lightly and gave her a small squeeze. “I deeply regret having to disturb you, but alas, the time has come for us to say our farewells for the night.”

Ladybug harrumphed and tightly wrapped her arms around his waist in mock indignation, which caused him to laugh.

He booped her nose playfully. “You are simply too cute, Ma Choupinette. But we absolutely cannot allow such rebellion from you. You are going home even if I have to transport you there myself.” With this said, he abruptly jumped up, carrying her in his arms bridal style, the sudden movement causing her to throw her arms tightly around his neck and squeal in surprise. He followed up by vigorously tickling her ribs with the hand that held her torso.

She squirmed in his hold and laughed freely. “Alright, alright, you win, I’ll go home! Now let me down, you doof!”

Chuckling, Chat set her back down on the ground, yet his hands remained on her waist, not quite ready to fully let her go. Similarly, she had released her hold around his neck but her hands had slid down onto his chest. He could feel the hair on his arms stand up and his face heat up, along with the butterflies fluttering wildly in his chest, and he was grateful that his suit covered most of his body so she wouldn’t be able to see it.

Her expression sobered and she said with difficulty, “By the way… I’m sorry I tried to kiss you. And I’m sorry I said all those awful things to you.”

Chat stroked her cheek and spoke to her softly, “You don’t have to say sorry. Not to me. I know you were feeling devastated by what happened to you earlier. I should have been more considerate to your feelings, acted more tactful.” He frowned and he spat bitterly, “That other guy… he’s a fool. He doesn’t deserve you. He will never deserve you,” he said emphatically. “You’re too good for him, too pure and sweet and kind. There is no excuse for the way he treated you and he doesn’t deserve your attention, nor does he deserve your forgiveness.”

Ladybug looked away from him and shrugged. “He really isn’t a bad person. Honestly, I can’t even be mad at him. He had every right to not return my feelings and reject me, even if he didn’t go about it the right way. Now I’m just dreading how horribly awkward things are going to be at school.”

Chat’s eyebrows rose in shock and his throat felt dry. How could she possibly be defending Felix even now? Was it because she was in love with him and she was seeing him through rose colored lenses, or would she have been just as kind to anyone else? Knowing her though, he suspected it was the latter.

Hesitating, he gulped but finally asked, “Are… are you going to speak with him about it?”

She exhaled and she shook her head. “He seems to really dislike me,” she replied. “I won’t be talking to him unless I really have to, like if we have a school assignment together.”

Chat frowned at this. Had he really cost himself the friendship he hadn’t realized they’d had?

“I’m sorry,” he replied remorsefully. “I wish I could make it up to you.”

She smiled weakly, yet it was the most melancholy smile he’d ever seen on her beautiful face. He never wanted to see her look that way again. He felt the protectiveness that he only ever felt around her overwhelm him, promptly followed by the crushing reminder that it was he who had caused her such pain.

She patted his arm. “Don’t be sorry, Mon Foufou. It’s not your fault. You couldn’t have known.”

Chat’s blood ran cold, the anxiety and self loathing he always carried within himself swelling exponentially every time he replayed that conversation in his head. He could never deserve her; not ever would he be worthy of her love. But... despite that, he still desperately longed for a chance. An opportunity to pursue her, to court her properly, to treat her like the Queen she was. Just one more chance to redeem himself, as much would be possible for a wretched person such as he, anyway. And maybe, just maybe, eventually she might forgive him. It was worth a try. She was worth the effort.

“For what it’s worth,” he spoke quietly, “I really did mean it. When I confessed.” He rubbed the back of his neck and felt his face redden. “I didn’t exactly say it the way I should have. I’m terrible at this sort of thing. Sharing my feelings and being sensitive to others. I’d like to try again sometime, and this time I’d like to do it right.” He wrung his hands together nervously. “You don’t have to say anything, I just…” he looked straight at her and said earnestly, “I just wanted you to know.”

Ladybug beamed at him, then nervously reached back to grab at one of her ponytails, developing a lovely blush that made her little freckles stand out. “Hmm… I wonder if that’s actually true. But in any case, thank you, Chat. Really.” She turned her body slightly, then added, “M-maybe someday, if you actually feel that way, and if you can prove it… Maybe we can--” she hesitated for a few moments, and continued, “Well… I won’t get ahead of myself. I don’t want to set myself up for any more disappointments. And I wouldn’t want to string you along, either; I’ll need time to get over my crush… a lot of time.” Chat felt his limbs stiffen at hearing those words again, the words Marinette had uttered back on her balcony. “I really did like him a whole lot.” She looked back at him and quirked her usual sweet smile. “But if you’re willing, then… I guess we can wait and see what happens.”

Chat Noir reached forward to take her hand, then lightly kissed her knuckles. “I’ll wait as long as it takes, My Queen. Anything for you.”

Big thanks to @imthepunchlord for letting me borrow Chat's nickname, "My Queen"

Mega super gigantic shout-outs to my amazing fabulous betas, @kryallaorchid and @chocoluckchipz who helped me with everything from brainstorming and editing to coming up with a title and summary (because I'm a hopeless hot mess) XD

#Miraculous Ladybug #Marinette Dupain Cheng #Felinette #Felix Agreste #Chat Noir #Felix!Chat #Ladybug #Eden Art #My Art: Miraculous Ladybug #Fan Art #fanfiction #Eden writes #oneshot #fanfic art #ML AU

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truthbeetoldmedia · 4 years

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The 100 7x01 "From the Ashes"

Welcome back to The 100 (for the last time). We have finally reached the beginning of the end and what a journey it promises to be. Last season ended with several big shockers, Abby Griffin was taken as a host for Simone Prime, the Flame was removed from Madi and effectively destroyed and Octavia Blake was stabbed and disappeared into a fine mist-ala Marvel characters after a Thanos snap. That means that the last season premiere The 100 will ever get already has a lot of questions to answer, in addition to (hopefully) managing to successfully wrap up a series that has spanned several years.

As in previous years I’ll be dividing my review into sections, previously these sections were a riff on the concept of “The Good, The Bad, The Ugly”. This season, I will be separating them based on plot line-as even in this first episode there are two different ones-until those plots begin to coalesce into one.

We’ll begin with what I am currently terming:

“The Main Plot That is Somehow Made Up of Only Side Characters (Two of Whom We Just Met)”

We pick up right where we left off, with Bellamy reeling from Octavia’s strange disappearance and rushing off into the woods around Gabriel’s compound to search for her. In his grief he’s less than observant and he is knocked unconscious and abducted by an apparently invisible force. These few seconds-less than 30-represent all of the screen time Bellamy Blake receives in the first episode of the final season of The 100. Fans who have been watching the promotion for the final season have become increasingly anxious over the absence of the male lead and it seems those anxieties were justified. It is astonishing and offensive that one of the core members of the show is removed completely from the story in the final season, his absence literally stripped from him as he is once again thrust back into a plot line he has only just managed to escape: his life (and thus his worth) being directly proportional to Octavia’s. As Hope escapes and Gabriel and Echo take off after Bellamy we finally actually enter “The Main Plot That is Somehow Made Up of Only Side Characters”.

Eventually, Gabriel and Echo run into Hope, who has discovered-albeit too late-a piece of paper lodged in her arm that states “Trust Bellamy”.That message doesn’t stop her from getting into a quick tussle with Echo and it’s obvious that she’s had some training-with a mother like Diyoza and some kind of relationship with Octavia, that’s not at all surprising. The three of them-after coming to a sort of peace with one another, journey for quite some time. It is full dark before they catch up with the invisible force that has taken Bellamy and when they do so, they find themselves caught up in the hallucinations that the anomaly causes.

Here we see Echo confronted by two ghosts from her past, King Roan and the actual Echo-the one she murdered in order to survive. Both ghosts make valid points-that Echo is a creature driven by servitude, which some I suppose would mistakenly call loyal. They even go so far as to question Echo’s purpose in life now that her current master (Bellamy) is missing. I don’t think it’s an unfair assessment. Echo latched on to Bellamy in Season 4, seeing him as an authoritarian figure and she never really let go. While I do believe that they both love each other, it seems very obvious that said love (at least on Echo’s part) is fueled by a need to have someone who she can serve. Who is Echo once she no longer has someone to answer to, who does she become when her one stabilizing figure is gone. I suppose that’s a question we’ll get answers to this season. Hope also sees a vision-albeit shorter-of Octavia telling her to stay quiet, no matter what she hears. As this is a line we’ve heard in the trailer, it seems obvious that the anomaly can also show someone memories and not just their innermost fears (what we see with Echo). Gabriel sees nothing-or at least nothing we see, but this is unsurprising given he’s studied the anomaly so long.

Finally managing to break free of the hallucinations that they’re being shown the trio manage to get the jump on a few of the invisible assailants and when they do the audience is shown the inside of their helmets. Hope they are told to kill on sight, indicating that she is somehow a known threat to them, but Echo and Gabriel are supposed to be reditioned to Bardo. I’d like to take the time to point out now that to rendition doesn’t simply mean to take. It means that you are treating these people as political prisoners who know potentially damaging information-and want to use any means including inhumane ones to retrieve that information. And Bellamy has already been taken. Despite the order to rendition Gabriel and Echo though, they don’t actually seem to want to capture them, instead continuing to rebuff them, together Gabriel, Echo and Hope manage to stop the assault and their story ends with them walking into the anomaly holding hands-so that they won’t be separated. It’s possible their next stop lands them directly in Bellamy’s path, but given it’s taken them so long to catch up with the Invisible Force I find that unlikely, especially given that the Force can apparently conjure up the anomaly whenever they choose to.

I do find it very interesting that the Invisible Force was also meant to capture Echo and Gabriel and yet-when they chase after Bellamy-the Force fights them off. I'm assuming that they choose to take Bellamy and leave the others so someone is left behind to tell Clarke that Bellamy has been taken.This makes sense as, Clarke being the main character, she’s likely the person they’re trying to ultimately take. It’s just one more piece of bait (that will produce no actual results) for Bellarke fans however. While the instinct is to be excited that whoever has taken Bellamy likely knows that Clarke will do whatever she can to save Bellamy, at this point we all know that nothing good is on the horizon for him.

This leads me into my next section:

“Almost All of the Mains are Here, but it Feels Like This Plotline is Unnecessary”

Sprinkled through this episode like bits of parsley (aka food grass) are the rest of the Arkadians (and yes I still call them that). So much of this particular plot feels like something that could have been taken care of during the Season 6 finale. Almost everything that happens in Sanctum could have been carefully tied up during the final bit of Season 6 and we could have begun this Season with the scene of Octavia being stabbed and disappearing. It feels very disjointed to watch Clarke (and the others) deal with the repercussions of what happened in space, like what to do with Russell Prime (especially as it appears that all of these things happen literally the day after the Season 6 finale). We’re expected to believe that Clarke has apparently gone through all of the stages of grief, somehow managed to find a perfect yellow farmhouse, set up Russell in what is essentially serving as a prison and begun to discuss plans for building a compound for the Arkadians all in, what is essentially a few hours after her mother’s death?

To top all of that off, we never see any cracks in the picture perfect “I’m fine” exterior until Clarke snaps when Russell hands over Abby's ring and clothes and begins to beat him rather brutally. It’s such a stark contrast to her behavior over the course of the episode that it just doesn’t align with anything that she’s done. To have Clarke go from “I want to do better because I don’t want Madi to grow up in a cruel society.” to “We’ve all made mistakes, tomorrow Russell Prime dies for his.” almost gave me whiplash. It would have been so much more believable if we’d seen small cracks in her facade over the course of the episode, but there were none. Am I meant to believe that-like Madi retains some of the memories of the Commanders before her even though the Flame is destroyed-that Josephine (and her sociopathy) linger in Clarke’s consciousness and that’s what made her brutally assault Russell? Or am I meant to believe that this is truly Clarke? I don’t know, but I do know that whatever message they were trying to sink there, it didn’t land.

I did really love Madi’s plot this episode. I enjoy that, now that the Flame is dead she doesn’t have to be a receptacle for a long dead love interest of Clarke’s. I enjoyed that she was going to school and has a house and a dog. I really liked that she was finally able to remind Clarke (and the audience) that she had a mother before Clarke and she didn’t just forget her because Clarke showed up. I did not like the fact that-even in the absence of the Flame-we are expected to believe that Madi still maintains memories from the commander and of course the one they choose to focus on is one of Clarke as Wanheda-meaning that it’s a memory of Lexa’s. It is infuriating to me that the Flame can be destroyed and yet Madi as a character somehow still exists as a mouthpiece for a character who has been dead for over 125 years at this point. It would be nice if this show could spend time actually developing the new characters they forcefully insert into the narrative every year, but I expect in the final season, that might be asking for a bit too much.

To further the refusal to leave the Grounders in the past, Jason somehow manages to have the Dark Commander transfer his consciousness into Russell Prime’s where he lurks in the background until Russell is knocked unconscious by Clarke (are we to assume Russell has not slept during this time as well?). My best guess is that he does this by using some type of Bluetooth/Wi-Ffi situation, When they are destroying the flame and uploading him into the Eligius ship. Because both are Eligius tech, the Flame and the mind drives created by Becca are similar. I assume the Dark Commander’s code searched for (and found in Russell-who was on the ship) something similar to his own tech and simply uploaded himself onto it in the background, waiting for an opportunity to show up. Now all that’s left is to see what type of fresh hell he unleashes on an entirely new planet-especially given some of the residents of said planet believe him to be a god.

I do find Murphy potentially interesting this year. For years he has managed to “cockroach” his way through situations. Staying alive through nearly impossible situations. But there seems to be a fair amount of turmoil surrounding his decisions as they relate to Clarke and Abby (and their deaths) as well as his decision to become a Prime. Given that connection with two of the three Griffin women, and my concern that Madi will find herself in danger once it’s discovered that she is no longer the Commander and once the Dark Commander manages to get her alone (which we all know will happen sooner or later), I would not be surprised if Murphy (who has never been one to make the sacrifice play) does so in this final Season.

Smaller things I enjoyed include Raven and Clarke’s relationship being on the mend. The two haven’t really been friends since Season 2 and Finn’s death, so it’s nice to see that-although it took Shaw and Abby’s deaths respectively-they seem to be leaning on each other at this time. With Clarke having lost all of her natural born family, it would not surprise me if she is willing to go to devastating lengths this Season to keep them all safe. I’m also very interested in the increased presence of both Gaia and Indra. As a fan of both Tati Gabrielle and Adina Porter (and their massive talent) in show’s outside of The 100, I’ve yearned for a deeper exploration into their relationship for Seasons. It looks like we might finally get to dive deeper into who they are now that Gaia is no longer a Flamekeeper and Indra no longer has a Commander.

Overall, I believe this is the weakest Season Premiere of The 100 to date, which is terribly disappointing given the fact that it’s the last one they’ve ever received. Even though we have yet to see the backdoor pilot (Rothenberg says it will be 708), it already feels like this final Season will serve more as a way to set up a show that will likely not take off the ground (because Rothenberg has successfully managed to upset every person in the show’s fanbase) than the sendoff to the existing characters and stories he’s spent 7 years building. It will be a terrible thing if that is indeed the case. Hopefully, based off of the title of this episode, The 100 will manage to make some sort of phoenix-esque ressurection. But for now, I don’t know if they have enough time to truly tell the story that Rothenberg wants to.

The 100 airs Wednesdays at 8/7c on The CW

Aprille’s episode rating: 🐝🐝

#The 100 #From the Ashes

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centaurianthropology · 6 years

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The Magnus Archives Season 3 Q&A – What We Learned!

So this isn’t my usual analysis, but I did decide to collate a little bullet-point list of all the things we’ve learned from the Season 3 Q&A for those of you who can’t/don’t want to listen for whatever reason, but still want the delicious information that we got. I’ll also be including my own thoughts about some of the points, so there will be some tasty meta. This will just be a bit more of an informational post than most are.

· The metaplot is known through season 5 (which will be the final season), and is hashed out in more detail at the beginning of each season. The individual spooky stories are not necessarily known prior to the week before writing. There is usually a general idea, but no specific details until far closer to the deadline.

· Martin’s crush on Jon was known from the beginning of the series. No specifics were given about when and how it came about on Martin’s end. I imagine we’ll probably get more into this as we go forward (I lean toward it developing while he was living in the Archives, as his attitude toward Jon definitely shifted from “I have to prove myself to my boss who doesn’t believe in me” to getting very emotional when he thought he left Jon and Tim to die in the tunnels). But it was known that the crush would or already had happened from the inception of Martin’s character.

· Tim’s background was known 2 seasons prior to now (so end of season 1). It only came about at that point because, prior to that, Tim was going to be the one to be replaced by the Not-Them at the end of season 1 rather than Sasha. There had to be a last-minute change because Lottie (the woman who played Sasha) had a scheduling conflict that meant she couldn’t commit to the continued large-scale time commitment. So Sasha got replaced, Tim got a backstory, and the rest is history. Very interesting to think that the descent into bitterness and potentially even the ties to the circus were originally meant to be Sasha’s. Is that why she was so interested in the calliope in season 1 perhaps? Having the only main female character also be the first to die was also one of the big reasons why they added a lot of major recurring female characters from then on.

· Basira and Daisy becoming as significant as they were was a combination of the characters being interesting and the actors being fun to working with. They also very much fulfilled certain necessary narrative roles.

· They knew Melanie was going to become an assistant from shortly after Lydia’s recording of her initial episode. I’m guessing this is partly to do with Lydia being already available, but I also have to imagine it was due to the instant, nasty rapport she had with Jon. She was certainly the character from season 1 who I most wanted back when I initially heard her.

· Jonny’s original pitch for the show was the 13 fears, though the Slaughter and the Hunt were initially the same, but as he worked through them he realized that the root fear was very different. It became especially apparent due to the fact that extremely different (and likely very poorly cooperating) sorts of people were driven to each of those powers. This is interesting, because it implies that Melanie and Daisy, though we have not seen them interact, would not get on at all. They’re driven by instincts that are too close but too different.

· Poor, poor Jonny is haunted by Elias’ surge in popularity during season 3, particularly the large contingent of fans who found him suddenly and definitely attractive. He blames Ben Meredith for all his woes: “It was only after [episode] 92 when he started to be properly, overtly villainous, and everyone just decided how sexy he was! When we were planning things out, there was no way for us to foresee how sexy Elias was going to be. Something I blame entirely on Ben.” And Alex cackled in the background.

· Melanie’s clap-marker as her statement beginning was actually improvisation on Lydia’s part (and works wonderfully with her background in video production). By and large, though, there was little improvisation from the actors. There was a lot of lean-in to certain qualities that actors brought out if they were particularly good at it.

· Jonny’s favorite power to write is the Flesh because it’s super weird and lets him dig into really odd writing. His least favorite is the Dark because it’s so easy to fall into tropes and clichés, and he doesn’t actually share that particular fear. He also finds writing the Desolation particularly challenging, as it treads the closest to his biggest distaste in horror: linking spooky fictional stuff with real-life trauma. The very nature of the Desolation lends itself to trauma-porn, so when writing it he has to be especially careful not to do that. Alex’s least favorite from a production standpoint is the Spiral because it’s always a nightmare editing it, but the Vast is his favorite, because he adds high amplitude low frequency noise to induce an on-edge feeling in the listener.

· Alex really enjoys killing all the characters you love. Sasha’s replacement might have been his favorite moment in the show, because it was subtle enough a lot of people didn’t catch it. He also seemed positively gleeful when joking about how very dead Tim is. Of all the changes in personality from character to actor, Alex is always the one who gives me the most whiplash. Which, I suppose, is a testament to his acting abilities.

· Perhaps Jonny’s greatest regret is naming the main character after himself and not thinking that would become … complicated. Apparently, in the earliest drafts he was just the host of the anthology series, and not a character in his own right, which is why he originally just went with his own name. Then he didn’t think to change it as they made Jonanthan Sims his own character with only vague similarities to Jonny (he was basically all the bits of Jonny that would make a good horror protagonist, exaggerated for effect, right up until about episode 20, at which point the character began to develop along his own lines and moved farther and farther from Jonny), who would like to believe that his own personal decisions were less “overtly horrific” than his fictional counterpart. Alex described Jonny vs Jon as “I’d like to think that you’re less of a hot garbage-fire of a person”. They both agreed that Jon (the character) was the absolute king of terrible decisions, and that it was hysterical to listen to Jonny’s parents eviscerate Jon’s incredibly awful decisions. I love Jonathan Sims, Head Asshole of the Magnus Institute, but I will agree with their assessment of his character.

· A similar regret was naming the assistants after Jonny’s then-roommates. Not only did it cause confusion (as all 3 have now also been in the show at some point), but he brutally killed off his fiancé’s namesake first. Oops?

· It sounds at least probable we’ll get the last bit of the Daedalus space station story in season 4. On that note, I found it interesting that all recurring story themes, etc, are mentioned to recur in season 4. There was absolutely no mention of season 5 at all. Which makes me leery.

· US distribution and ratings for podcasts are … interesting. Jonny could add in all the violence, explicit gore, and even sex he wanted. The only thing (literally the only thing) that gets a podcast marked *explicit* is swearing. Which meant that the podcast, in order to not be marked as explicit, had to scale back the language and nothing else. Every time a character swears, it has to be well-thought-out, and Jonny has to sell Alex on why it’s important. On the up-side, the lack of swearing was apparently what convinced Sue Sims to be a part of the cast, so I think getting Gertrude is well worth adherence to a laughably odd rule for US ratings. Also, on that same note, Alex’s imitation of Jonny’s mother nearly made me snort tea up my nose. So thanks for that, Alex.

· Jonny believes that what he writes is ‘escapist horror’. It’s a way of indulging in fear and spookiness in a controlled, safe way, when it won’t suddenly turn deeply unpleasant and traumatic. He believes that his audience needs to trust that they can enjoy the horror without worrying that it will unexpectedly cross lines. He separates that from literary horror, which often does dig into very traumatic issues through the mechanisms of horror in very thoughtful ways. All horror, in his opinion, needs to be respectful when it tackles very traumatic subjects. The reason that Jonny personally doesn’t write literary horror is that he has no personal experience with those sorts of traumas, and would not feel qualified to dig into them in a genuine and thoughtful way. He therefore sticks to escapist horror that his audience knows they can enjoy without worrying about it suddenly veering from spooks to trauma.

· The sound of the Anglerfish is a baby crying, slowed down 100x. Nikola had record scratches layered under her voice very subtly.

· Jonny’s favorite thing to record in season 3 was his [MUFFLED FEELINGS], and he revealed that he managed to sound like he had a gag in his mouth by trying to stuff as much of his fist into his mouth as possible before trying to deliver lines. Which produced a really amazing amount of saliva, apparently. They also had a lot of fun trying to record one of the larger group scenes in which most of the participants shouted at one another, because they used up most of the oxygen in the studio and all got very dizzy. Alex really enjoyed recording his scenes in episode 100, because it was one of the few times he got to improvise, and he and the actress spent the entire episode trying to make one another laugh.

· Also, all statements in episode 100 are confirmed to have been supernatural events, simply told badly. The actors got a paragraph telling them what really happened, as well as some bullet points detailing how they might get side-tracked or otherwise be terrible statement givers. The rest was slowly improvised, with frequent checks for canon-compliance. And, yes, episode 100 was absolutely a funny way of answering the question: “Does the magic power also make them really eloquent storytellers?” “YES. YES, IT DOES.”

· Alex misses his old analogue mixer. There was about 2 minutes of eulogizing.

· Tim is 100% dead. They also specify that they will never resurrect characters or bring them back from the dead (which makes Jon’s current situation particularly worrisome, as he’s not quite dead, but he’s inches from it). Dead characters may still make appearances via tape (Gertrude’s been dead the whole time, and it hasn’t stopped her from showing up plenty) or speak from beyond the grave (thanks Gerry), but if a character dies, they will not come back to life. This also means that Michael will not be coming back as the Distortion. The distortion is now Helen, and the story of the Distortion is about what and who she is. Michael may return as audio, of course, but not in the form of the Distortion. Likewise, Gertrude and Leitner in the season finale were not ghosts; they were mostly Nikola, with a little bit of Unknowing reality-bending-weird thrown in.

· Georgie will be returning, but she will be an occasionally recurring character rather than a regular.

· The Usher Foundation is the American sister foundation to the Magnus Institute, which is similar to it but different. It’s a way to broaden the world and give a nice hook for fanfiction/RPG settings/etc. The same can be said of the other institutions like the Chinese research institution. It’s a way to expand the world and to give a sense of scope without a locked-down story. There’s just too much story to fit into two more seasons as is.

· There is a nexus of timeline discrepancies that is 100% part of the plot, but the rest of timeline issues are probably just mistakes. Mary Kaey’s dates are almost definitely oversights in writing, but Jonny doesn’t discount that he might do something with the discrepancy to make it an interesting plot point in the future.

· Gerry’s father is not confirmed to be Eric, the research assistant of Gertrude’s who took the statement in ‘Upon a Stair’, as Jonny refused to answer the question. He did, however, state that whoever asked had been listening very closely.

· Any character who believes they understand how the powers work is absolutely wrong. This does include Gerry’s interpretation of Robert Smirke’s cosmology, though Jonny did state that what Gerry said is about as close as we’re likely to get to the truth of the cosmology (no exposition dump is a lie, but it’s only a decent approximation). However, the powers are going to defy any attempt to nail them down or perfectly sum them up. Plenty of things will not line up with the way Gerry described them, because the powers work on nightmare logic, not normal logic.

· The tapes are NOT neutral. They are not simply objects to record. There is more to them than that, but we don’t know what.

· Jonny is a massive history nerd. He got very into Wolfgang von Kempelin, and his imitation of von Kempelen’s speaking machine was hysterical. His favorite episode to write was ‘Tale of a Field Hospital’ for similar history nerd reasons.

· The first trailer for the series (with the chanting) was meant as a mood piece, but has absolutely nothing to do with the meta plot. It was recorded before half of the meta plot was even established.

· The Magnus Institute, beyond the Archival staff and Elias, is just a legitimate supernatural academic research institution. The library does exactly what it says it does (house and catalogue valuable texts on the supernatural). Artifact Storage really does just store and experiment on supernatural artifacts. Research is mostly students working on dissertations and theses. They are even confirmed to run on an academic fiscal year (thanks to whatever fiscal nerd asked that particular question!)

· All the supernatural things encountered in the show are tied to the powers, but Jonny does not categorically deny that other supernatural stuff exists in the TMA universe. It very simply won’t be addressed in the show, as introducing other supernatural stuff beyond the powers wouldn’t work this late in the story. The powers play with folklore, but they do not necessarily generate folklore themselves.

· For purposes of the story, every power only has one ritual we need to be concerned about.

· BIG ANSWER: no power has completed a ritual to date. The rituals are now confirmed to so radically change the fabric of reality that there is no one on the planet who wouldn’t notice a successful ritual or be effected by it in a massive way. We are not living in a world in which the Beholding has already succeeded, or any other power. Jonny would not answer whether or not it was possible to reverse or somehow mitigate a successful ritual. And that makes me very suspicious that the season finale of season 4 will be the successful completion of the Watcher’s Crown, and season 5 may be trying to reverse or mitigate it in some way.

· Leitner is likely to return (one would imagine in one of Gertrude’s tapes).

· Jonny and Alex have made the deliberate decision not to overly describe any of the major characters beyond their plot-relevant descriptors (Tim is described as attractive, but we will not get any details of that attractiveness). Jonny doesn’t even have confirmed ages for most of the characters. He thinks Jon is his age (almost 30). Martin is either a bit older or a bit younger than Jon. Tim, Sasha, and Melanie are ‘young adults’, which Jonny defines as somewhere between 25 and early thirties. Elias is middle-aged. Gertrude and Leitner are old. Trevor is “old as balls”.

· Jon is 100% on the asexual spectrum, but may not use that term to describe himself. He would instead avoid the question, and avoid thinking about it too deeply in general. He would be very uncomfortable describing his own sexuality. Also, Jonny made it very clear that the way Jon grapples with his inhumanity is neither a parallel to nor a comment on his asexuality. He approaches them very differently. He didn’t specify this, but so far as I can tell, he avoids even thinking about his sexuality, but he actively agonizes over his increasing inhumanity. I wonder if we might end up getting a bit more of how Jon thinks about his own asexuality if he and Martin ever get their shit together enough to discuss things.

· The statements are 90% Intangible Horror colonizing Jon’s brain, and 10% Jon is a massive drama queen secretly. They also agreed that, if he did amateur theatre as a younger man, he would have been insufferable.

· Tim, prior to his revenge kick, was into lots of socialization, adventure vacations (rock climbing, kayaking, scuba, etc), and may have also been a bit of a console gamer. “Lots of socializing; adventure holidays; dead.”

· There are no specifics at this point on the characters’ families that haven’t been addressed that Jonny was comfortable discussing, as he wanted to hold those details in reserve for later relevance. He doesn’t want to be beholden to random answers he might throw out right now. He would say (potentially joking) that Martin has a spider (or a series of spiders) that live in his closet over the past year, and he calls it/them George.

· The Admiral is a composite of all the cats in Jonny’s life, which all seem to have odd rank-names (Sir Pouncealot, Ambassador Cat, the Colonel). The Admiral is a reflection of all Jonny’s favorite things about cats.

· We are not going to be meeting any other plot-integral characters we haven’t already heard of. There will be new voices, but they will be names we recognize. There will be no new archival assistants. They’ve played that card.

· The characters with horror-writer last names (Martin, Tim, Sasha, Georgie, and Melanie) all have paranormal research backgrounds. This is why that convention was used for them specifically. Given that they were not certain of the direction they were going to take Basira and Daisy when they were first written, their last names did not follow this.

· Jon cannot compel dogs. Probably.

· Why an owl is the crest of the Magnus Institute (officially): “Owls are weird. They are considered very wise, but actually one of the stupidest animals in the world. They have a very strong field of vision. And, some species of owl, if you look in their ear you can see the side of their eyeball.”

· To serve ANY of the entity is to bring fear and suffering to others. That is what your existence is twisted into.

· Alex is most frightened by the Vast. Jonny is most frightened by the Corruption, but worries his lack of tidiness might tempt its attention.

· My favorite question and answer: if they could fight any writer in hand-to-hand combat, who would it be? They both agreed on HP Lovecraft, because “I could almost definitely take him, and it would be so satisfying.” They both agreed that neither of them would feel bad for punching Lovecraft, which, even as someone who does a yearly reading of a lot of his works … yeah. I’d agree. He had amazing creativity and really laid out my favorite horror sub-genre (debatably Robert Chambers invented it, but Lovecraft properly expanded it into a genre), but there are few authors as in need of a proper walloping as HP Lovecraft. They agreed that others—for Jonny, DH Lawrence, for Alex, James Joyce—were also in need of some fighting, but had serious doubts whether or not they could beat them in hand-to-hand combat (“We’re not exactly prime physical specimens”). Maybe just kicking them in the shins. Jonny admitted to an embarrassing love of a lot of literary ‘classics’ people like to shit on, like “Ulysses” and “Moby Dick”.

And that was that! This is the entirety of the MASSIVE Patreon Q&A. Apparently the one that went up tonight on the website is a very pared-down version of this Q&A (website version is 43 minutes; Patreon version is 1 hour 48 minutes). Not sure which of these answers didn’t make the cut, but here you go! All the delicious meta and answers you could want, fresh from the Patreon!

#The Magnus Archives #analysis #ish #more like infodump for non-Patrons #plus my own speculation #now edited for some glaring grammatical errors I noticed

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pass-the-bechdel · 7 years

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Supergirl season two full review

How many episodes pass the Bechdel test?

100% (twenty-two of twenty-two).

What is the average percentage per episode of female characters with names and lines?

49.93%

How many episodes have a cast that is at least 40% female?

Nineteen.

How many episodes have a cast that is less than 20% female?

Zero.

How many female characters (with names and lines) are there?

Twenty-five. Thirteen who appear in more than one episode, five who appear in at least half the episodes, and two who appear in every episode.

How many male characters (with names and lines) are there?

Thirty-six. Thirteen who appear in more than one episode, four who appear in at least half the episodes, and one who appears in every episode.

Positive Content Status:

Though the numbers turned out higher than last season by virtue of some stellar narratives in the early part of the season, in reality this was a disappointing return to the show, by-and-large shallower and overly dependent on life-defining concepts of unhealthy romance (average rating of 3.09).

General Season Quality:

Starts out fantastically well, but loses steam around mid season, and turns pretty damn sour by season’s end. A shocking waste of the potential promised by the first season; I’ve practically got whiplash from how severely this turned.

MORE INFO (and potential spoilers) under the cut:

Well, this was a clusterfuck. Let’s see if we can break it down into three manageable categories: world building, politics, and relationships.

The primary victim of this season’s bad storytelling is the alien world of Daxom, and the shoddy world-building there leaks out all over the rest of the narrative. We’re told initially that Daxom is some horrible party planet whose politics were at odds with truth, justice, and the Kryptonian way - we’re told this within a clear framework of confronting ingrained prejudices (something I applauded at the time, you may recall), a context which implies that there is complexity and nuance to Daxom that is going unrecognised, and which we might reasonably expect to explore as the season progresses. It doesn’t happen. We’re told that the people of Daxom are kept drunk so that they won’t question their oppression; we’re told that they were all too drugged up to ‘feel anything’; we’re told that they maintained a sex-drenched hedonistic society headed by an evil, war-mongering, slave-owning royal family (the slavery thing really makes it seem like Kara buried the lede by complaining about a ‘party planet’, too: honestly who cares if they’re partying? They have slavery. SLAVERY). Our hero Supergirl even tells us that the Daxomite prince was ‘the worst of the lot’, though she conveniently neglects to detail how he was the worst, which becomes conspicuous once it is revealed that her new boyfriend Mon-El is that prince. Everything we ever learn about Daxom is cartoonishly negative; it’s also somewhat at odds with itself. Were the Daxomites viciously oppressed and constantly partying? While it is technically possible to have both be true, the entire planet is treated as such a homogenous whole it’s hard to know who was suffering, who was livin’ it up, and who was doing both. Are the rich people being kept drunk and drugged so that they won’t object to their own superiority? Are the poor people provided the freedom and resources to party hard on a constant basis to prevent them from rioting over their non-specified hardships? The details are so vague we can’t even draw clear conclusions about who is responsible for this situation, because if everyone is drunk, drugged, or otherwise unable to gain perspective on their circumstances, then can they really be blamed for them? Daxom’s entire population is tarred with the same broad brush, a collection of cliches masquerading as world-building but really only serving to form a blurry image of a dysfunctional and inherently bad society. And with Daxom’s bevy of stereotypes standing unquestioned and therefore unclear, we segue easily into...

Politics. Early on when I applauded the show’s transparency about stating its political convictions, I had no idea how far they intended to take it, and how blisteringly uncool it would be. Where, at that early stage, the politics the show was declaring was all about equal rights and therefore undeniably positive, as the Daxom issue grew the political mess became far less inclusive. Despite being confronted by the reality of Krypton’s flaws back in the first season as well as in this one, the positioning of Daxom as an uncomplicated evil serves to backtrack on Supergirl’s personal growth in recognising that she is not immune from bigotry herself, instead validating her hatred. Ironically, they get the opportunity to examine the same confrontation for Mon-El later in the season when meeting with his parents forces him to acknowledge how far his personal beliefs have strayed from his upbringing, and yet they waste that chance as well, because duh, Daxom is bad. Exploring what was wrong with Daxom wasn’t about furthering that statement on equal rights, not least because exploration of Daxom’s flaws didn’t really happen at all, we were just handed the party line and told to go with the idea that this whole planet was garbage. And then on top of that, the show went and made the political division of Krypton and Daxom into a stand-in for real life American Democrats vs Republicans, with Rhea echoing Republican catchphrases while the much-championed equality-advocate and literal alien President of the United States is explicitly identified as a Democrat! Supergirl’s writers thus make a statement not about political policy or basic rights, but about political affiliation in the real world, and there’s nothing positive about using the cartoonish villainy of Daxom as a vehicle for attacking Republicans. This sends the message that Supergirl is not a show for Republican audience members, and that divisiveness is just not useful. Instead of using their show as a platform to promote positive and healthy ideas, it is used as a weapon to shame and (again with the irony) alienate a potential half of its viewership, and in the current political climate, that’s irresponsible story telling, not to mention anathema to Supergirl’s first-season theme of unity across barriers.

So, we have a world that is just broad-strokes Bad News, an ill-advised not-metaphor for real-world political divisions, and a bunch of missed opportunities to explore the nature of bigotry. That last one is a bigger problem than it may initially appear, too, as noted in the episode posts: if the writers were trying to tell this story in a serious way, they’d have really invested in deprogramming Mon-El. As eager as they were to make Daxom ‘evil’, they didn’t want to also make Mon-El ‘evil’ as Kara said he was when she spoke unknowingly of Daxom’s prince, and so Mon-El becomes a victim of the vague world-building of Daxom, and creates a feedback loop which in turn makes Daxom’s world-building more vague by virtue of its politics not being clearly reflected in the unfiltered behaviour of its favourite son. The show wants Mon-El to be blamed for being born the prince of Daxom, but it also doesn’t want that - it wants the cheap drama of Kara expressing her own bigotry, but it doesn’t want Mon-El to actually be that bad, but it doesn’t want to admit that Kara is prejudiced, but it doesn’t want her opinion to be wholly justified in this one instance, just every other one, etc, etc. The show is too afraid to demonstrate Supergirl having ugly beliefs of her own to question, nor does it really want to do its due diligence on having Mon-El process the complex reality of having everything he was raised to believe called into question and/or summarily rejected by his new society. In the process, the season forgets to have any kind of moral centre, losing itself in that all-encompassing disavowal of Republican politics but failing to be specific even then, and a superhero story without a moral centre is...kinda pointless. The resulting mess of politics and lazy short-hand, again, cripples Mon-El’s functionality as a character as he ends up tacked together out of disparate pieces, never really Daxom enough for Daxom, his playboy issues mostly pared down into base-level comic relief, and a grotesque romantic entanglement thrown in over the top to make his convoluted non-personality worse.

Which brings us to: relationships. Perhaps surprisingly, I don’t actually think Mon-El himself is the worst part of this season - as noted above, I see him as a symptom of much bigger issues - but his relationship with Kara is a huge problem. It plays pretty much every toxic bullshit trope I would have expected this show - especially after the precedent of awareness set last season - to avoid. The fact that Mon-El’s fuckboy behaviour is the only real evidence of that Daxomite heritage the show is refusing to properly unpack means it comes off not as a learning curve for him so much as an uncharacteristic weak point for Kara, that she would tolerate being screwed around by the thoughtlessness of this guy. That the show repeats this lazy drama literally one episode after another, having Mon-El mistreat or disappoint Kara at the start but make it up to her by the end, is further damaging as it shows Kara suffering a cycle of poor behaviour without any indication of why she keeps coming back to it, which again makes her appear weak-willed in total contradiction of her usual Supergirl persona, feeding an image of her as so love-struck as to be victimised by it despite any such ‘love’ being entirely unearned by the arcs of the narrative. That this is not only a massive unhealthy cliche but also one which is being served up without commentary as though the writers legitimately think it’s unproblematic romance makes it all the more shocking. Kara’s personality is overridden by her romance with Mon-El, and the rest of her relationships - most notably with Alex - are sidelined in favour of it; as the season wears on Kara rarely manages stories of her own that don’t revolve around the spontaneous and awkwardly forced romance with Mon-El. Why does she love him? Because the script says so. She loves him despite him being a Daxomite, but we’re not gonna explore that because it’s in admitting-that-good-guys-have-flaws territory. Giving the romance nuance or believability or unpredictability would require better characterisation of Mon-El and therefore Daxom and therefore, Kara’s prejudices that we’re supposed to pretend aren’t really a problem because Daxom is Evil. If Kara could have spent the season navigating the pains of bigotry with Mon-El, that would have been interesting and thought-provoking storytelling, and if they really insisted on making a romance there at least they woulda been treading some less generic ground.

Then again, they were already treading less generic ground when Kara was oh-so-briefly with James Olsen, before some fuckwit decided that it was too racially subversive to tell that story, and James ended up shafted with a promising but under-developed personal story and little to no contact with the rest of the characters all season long, making it almost weird when he occasionally graced us with an appearance. Alex at least fared better in the relationship that drew her away from Kara the majority of the time, scoring one of the only good subplots of the season in the form of her coming-out process, though I must admit I dislike Maggie and find her a flat, poorly-drawn character, as if the writers went ‘she’s a tough lesbian cop! That’s three words! It’s plenty of personality!’ and just kinda left it at that, and that taints the ongoing story of Alex’s personal life. The only passable romance in this season of Unnecessary Romances For Everyone Not Called James was J’onn and M’gann, and that possibly only worked because it was understated and featured but briefly; Winn’s relationship with Lyra, on the other hand, was just another cliche mess as irritating as it was dull, and pointless to boot, like the writers couldn’t figure how to write Winn a personal plot without it being a romance. Nice work, guys.

There is so much more that we could complain about this season - don’t even get me started on the total misfire which was the CADMUS plot - and so few things to appreciate - Lena Luthor deserves a nod, queer rep is always a win, Martian stuff is great, Clark Kent is delightful - but it’s probably time to let this bad batch go. If we’re lucky, the folks behind Supergirl learned about a trillion lessons about how to do storytelling and will get back to actually trying, come season three. If not, I guess y’all can look forward to me bitching about it. A lot. They burned my trust in this show worse this season than I would have thought possible, and I’m not convinced they can earn it back. We’ll see.

#Supergirl #Supergirl season two #Bechdel Test #female representation #full season review

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aion-rsa · 4 years

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Shameless Season 11 Episode 5 Review: Slaughter

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This Shameless review contains spoilers.

Shameless Season 11 Episode 5

“One again it’s up to Frank Gallagher to save the neighborhood.”

At several points season 11 of Shameless has reminded me of Weeds’s messy final year. This is not a positive comparison, but Shameless’s “Slaughter” creates several parallels between these Showtime series and the dissolution of their central families. Weeds doesn’t end on a perfect note, but its finale at least attempts something deeply ambitious. Shameless is headed down similar territory with its characters, but it’s not a show that’s ever stylistically rocked the boat. This has led to a final season that has largely felt aimless, which is true to life sometimes, especially when the majority of a series’ characters are caught in ruts.

This can be an exciting way to explore character development and push individuals forward when it happens early on or in the middle of a show’s run, but it’s not necessarily the best approach for a series’ final year unless it’s willing to really put in the work. Shameless’s 11th season has felt simultaneously more fragmented and serialized than previous seasons and it’s amounted to a season that’s felt largely superfluous, even if it’s almost halfway over. Each episode of the season has been able to play with at least one compelling idea, yet “Slaughter” is an episode where so many characters mess up their lives.

Shameless’s final season has perhaps arrived at the narrative marker where it pushes everyone to their lowest points before they’re able to reach–or not reach–redemption by the series’ big finish. “Slaughter” is by far one of the craziest episodes that Shameless has ever done, which would be true even if Liam didn’t commit manslaughter by the time that the credits roll.

Debbie has been problematic all season, but her misadventures in “Slaughter” make up some of the episode’s most painful material. This storyline actually begins in a decent place where Debbie listens to Franny for once and takes her daughter to see her favorite wrestler, Queen Justice. Despite how this sounds sweet, Debbie reverts to her usual behavior and her own interests and insecurities become more important than those of her daughter.

Debbie realizes that there’s a good deal about her girlfriend, Sandy, that she doesn’t know about, whereas Debbie has implicitly shared her entire life with Sandy, to the point that her bond with Franny seems even stronger than Debbie’s at times. Nearly every episode of this season of Shameless has contained a disgusting moment between Debbie and her daughter that’s really made me cringe.

This time it’s Debbie lying about Franny having cancer so she can rush off to a strip club in order to invade her girlfriend’s privacy. Somehow this is more vile than Frank’s attempt to euthanize an elderly lady. That being said, this is basically exactly the same behavior that Frank pulled off with his children in the past, so at least in this sense Shameless has properly shown how some of Frank’s kids are very much their father’s children. That’s distressing to some extent, but it’s these moments that validate and get the most out of Shameless’ decade-plus run.

On the subject of the Gallagher patriarch, Frank is largely still occupied with fallout regarding the Milkovich invasion next door. There’s copious gruesome content that I suppose qualifies as visual gags, but it mostly involves animal carcasses, body mutilation, and Milkoviches that are covered in fresh blood. It’s a lot more shocking that someone egging the Gallagher home or negligently walking around naked.

Poor, sweet Liam is also the one who seems to needlessly suffer the most from these new confrontational neighbors. Extreme jokes aren’t Shameless’ strong suit and the series isn’t articulate enough to make a scene where someone gets a swastika branding feel satirical or even necessarily comedic. Nevertheless, this feud between the Galaghers and Milkoviches continues to intensify in significant ways. All of this comes down to Frank’s commitment to murder an old lady, because this is Shameless.

Lip and Tami’s strife in this episode also revolves around housing woes, but of a completely different nature. They quickly need to find a new place to live, which is a complication that’s ridiculous for all sorts of reasons, especially with the news that Lip has nothing in paper regarding his ownership of their home. This somehow leads to the two of them heading into purchase the South Side’s equivalent to an Amityville murder house.

There’s such whiplash with this material over whether it should be a problem that Lip withholds this information from Tami, which has become a running theme through this season. However, the episode doesn’t treat Lip’s lies or the fact that a full family was murdered in their prospective home as problems. This is a little stunning and what instead becomes the issue is something that’s a lot more preventable.

Suddenly Lip and Tami don’t have the money to buy this bargain slaughterhouse because of Lip’s behavior at work. There’s such a palpable sense of dread once Lip picks a fight with his bosses after his hours get cut. It’s pretty clear where things are headed and this disaster occurs when it’s literally the worst opportunity for such a thing to happen. Lip’s drinking afterwards doesn’t help either and honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if his former employer presses charges against him, because this is Shameless.

The rest of the Gallaghers are caught up with material that doesn’t necessarily amount to much this week, but definitely has potential to grow. Ian and Mickey establish a work dynamic that doesn’t seem sustainable, but at least has them friendly towards one another. Vee’s attempts to contribute more to the neighborhood than cheap weed are sadly discouraged when she’s not met with the expected results during her canvassing. No one is a part of the demographic that Vee feels properly represents the South Side, but this is perhaps indicative of what the South Side may actually be like now, which speaks to the season’s one big theme.

The one real saving grace in “Slaughter” is Carl’s development in the police force and his capacity to remain unflappable in the face of pressure from his seniors. Leesie continues to utilize radical tactics at work that bring out complicated feelings in Carl. Truly some of the most redeeming moments from this season are the scenes where Carl demonstrates that he’s good at his job and knows the neighborhood well enough to be the kind of cop in the community that can actually get results.

“Slaughter” consistently turns up the heat until its final scene reaches a boiling point. The episode’s conclusion where Liam inadvertently kills–or doesn’t?–the head of the Milkovich family is the perfect encapsulation of “Slaughter’s” blunt, violent, absurdist nature. It’s a completely unexpected ending that feels highly out of place in Shameless, even more so with the stylized manner in which it’s presented. It’s an event that would have had serious repercussions in the earlier seasons of the series that’s now played off as a morbid punchline.

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This is a world where hypothetical “magic bullets” will solve problems and everything will return to the status quo. There’s a full season’s worth of new plotlines that are haphazardly initiated in this episode, but it’s also possible that lightning will just strike everyone or that the South Side will experience a bout of spontaneous human combustion, because this is Shameless.

The post Shameless Season 11 Episode 5 Review: Slaughter appeared first on Den of Geek.

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#aion-rsa #Den of Geek

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hopelesstvaddict · 7 years

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BEYOND THE WALL AFTERTHOUGHTS

Another episode I need to process. This time it’s not so much about Dany or any characters in particular and more about the technical choices made by the show and how it’s dragging down the whole structure.

This season has been quite baffling to me especially since it came after the highly efficient sixth season, which gave me faith that once freed from GRRM’s books, the show could actually be THIS good. Instead, I find myself quite puzzled by each episode of Season 7 - always liking but never without something irking me. The fault rests in the decision to reduce the number of episodes and cram everything up. So of course it makes for a compelling viewing experience with storylines moving much faster and characters coming together but it also accentuates two of Thrones’ biggest problems - the portrayal of time and the loss of character(s).

It’s always been a known thing that the show never cares about time consistency with characters randomly popping up everywhere in Westeros whenever it is necessary. Viewers are supposed to assume that the required amount of time has passed. But where Thrones made up for it in previous seasons is that it actually showed characters travelling while making reference to passing time. A few notable examples being Robert’s travelling north from King’s Landing to Winterfell or Arya journeying the whole of Westeros or going to Braavos. But lately and especially this season, characters seem to magically teleport when in fact they do still travel - it’s just not shown anymore. The reduced amount of episodes paired with the numerous developments crammed within even one episode really makes it hard to make the effort of remembering that time passes and that one single episode actually spans at least days if not weeks.

This season never acknowledges explicitly how much time has passed since the season opener - perhaps because if it did, it would blatantly point out its biggest flaw. But taking some time to think about time (!) might help with some of my concerns regarding this season and this latest installment in particular. Considering the time spent to travel to Dragonstone from Winterfell alone on Jon’s part, the time allowed to stay there and mine the dragonglass (By the way was the whole point of mining it to create a charged scene between Jon and Dany? That dragonglass would have been handy beyond the Wall. Just saying…), how much time a raven takes to fly across the whole continent to deliver a message and the fact that Sansa says she hasn’t heard of him in weeks (funny how there is not a SINGLE episode where she doesn’t mention him), it’s actually much more acceptable to think that feelings might have emerged between Jon and Dany rather than over the course of a few days as was first assumed. This same amount of time also really makes it easier to accept that the Northerners have grown weary of Jon’s absence because really it’s been weeks/months now.

But that’s the problem - so much time passing in so few episodes and it being not explicit creates confusion. Not to mention sometimes clear whiplash. This episode was a particularly good example of this.The first shot of Jon’s Magnificent Seven heavily implied that the group had gone far north, way beyond the Wall. So that’s at least a few days we assume. Then when all hell breaks loose, Gendry is sent back running to Eastwatch to send a raven to Dany who is still in Dragonstone. Let us all just assume that Gendry’s legs are as muscular as his arms and that he could run without stopping (!) all the way before finally collapsing right before the door to Eastwatch (how convenient). But you can’t possibly accept that the run spanned in less than one day, especially in heavy snow. That the show implies that he was back at the Wall by nightfall baffles me immensely. And that’s also assuming Gendry magically didn’t get lost - apparently he’s better at finding his way back in snowstorms than in calm seas - and that he wasn’t attacked by a wight. Why Jon and the rest didn’t go with him I still don’t quite understand but let’s just assume that they wanted to make sure one of them made it out alive to tell Dany what happened instead of them all dying together… Anyway, Gendry takes at least a full day to get back to the Wall. They send a raven to Dragonstone which takes at least another full day. Then Dany flies all across the continent to beyond the Wall. Assuming that her dragons fly very fast, I can accept that in a day or perhaps less, she makes it in time to save Jon and the rest of the band. So that’s at least several days that Jon and the band were stranded on that rock. Assuming this really sheds a new light on the battle and makes more sense than the whole thing happening over the course of one day. In a similar way, we are to assume that Jaime and Co were travelling for some time back from Highgarden for Dany to reach them on their way. I can accept that dragons fly fast but the Dothraki do not have superfast horses. With this assumption, that’s at least another day or two that Jon stayed at Dragonstone to meet Theon while Dany was away.

This very problem of pacing is why this season - while very compelling to watch - also feels rushed. Everything accelerates, racing towards the endgame and we can’t really catch a breath. Every move made is crucial not in itself but rather in advancing towards a certain point. While the whole wight hunt is important, the plan itself is very weak if not outright foolish and we could see miles away that nothing would go as planned. That Tyrion is the one behind it makes it even worse. In fact, Tyrion seems a bit at a loss when it comes to his plans this season which is a far cry from the wit we have seen during past seasons. What is his purpose if Dany never listens to him ? His schemes are intelligent and clever and it’s still buyable that he could be outdone by his own siblings but to come up with this kind of plan and have it validated by both Jon and Dany and everyone else by thinking that Cersei will come to her senses just by seeing a wight is beyond me. What was the point of Jon actually going ? Couldn’t he have sent someone (Tormund) ? Why risk the King in the North’s life for something as futile as this ? Hasn’t he said that he will protect the North as long as he can ? How is this foolish expedition protecting the North if he loses his life so recklessly (which he almost does) ? Where’s Sansa’s no-nonsense speeches when they’re the most needed ?

All in all, that single wight is captured but the whole expedition seems to have been designed specifically to bring about Viserion’s demise. It’s a rather weak plot device that just has Jon and Dany traveling Westeros back and forth and forth and back, losing a particularly formidable asset to the Enemy. The feel of past seasons where characters acted and traveled for valid reasons instead of poping up wherever the story requires them to is sorely missed. Of course, that’s just how the show goes and the loss of a dragon was something that had been expected for years now. After all, Dany could not have gone on forever unchallenged. Losing one of them was the only thing that could rock the foundations of her storyline. Even so, Viserion’s death is another example of the show’s accelerating problem. In a similar way to Season 4’s The Watchers on the Wall, the major casualty is squeezed between two scenes. Now I know that this is how Thrones works - especially this season - and perhaps it was intended as pure shock with no intention to let viewers breathe but sometimes it is beneficial to just… well… breathe. Viserion was never the focus of the attention. Drogon always was since the beginning. In fact, it’s not even explicitly said that Viserion is the one who bit the dust. Inconsistency in how his horns are depicted doesn’t help either. But his loss is nevertheless a game changer and yet we’re not given any time to mourn him that we are hit with another twist - which is him being brought back by the Night King. Had the death been placed at the very end of the episode, it would have made in my opinion a much more powerful impact like Robb and Catelyn’s deaths during the Red Wedding which were placed at the end of the Rains of Castamere episode giving us a full week to adjust and mourn before the next installment aired. Similarly, the episode here could have ended with Jon being left behind while Dany flew away and that would have made for a great cliffhanger. The finale would have opened with Benjen’s rescue and then the boat scene we saw as an epilogue, transitioning smoothly to the boatbang we’re all expecting. With the final scene of the season being all but known at this point, Viserion’s turning - while exciting to watch - would be rendered useless and this final scene would have more than made up for it, accomplishing the same purpose of showing Viserion’s transformation. That the show does not even take the time to name its major casualty during this episode really speaks volumes on how it is intent on going forward and put the focus on the story rather than its characters. Really how easy would it have been to have Dany utter Viserion’s name ? Not necessarily during her rather quiet reaction to his death - not what I had in mind but as equally sad and beautiful and probably the first time this season we are shown genuine emotion on her part; it’d be interesting to compare Dany’s supposed fiery temperament and her “cold” reaction to her child’s death, to Robb (supposedly a child of ice) reacting with a much more heated behavior when he learnt of his father’s death, admittedly the kind of reaction I was expecting from Dany - but couldn’t she have mentioned him during her whole epilogue with Jon ?

That’s the problem with Thrones lately. Yes, it is visually and technically impressive. But storywise ? Not so much. The Spoils of War was the first exemple of this. Unfortunately, try to look past the spectacle in terms of visuals and you find yourself with a lot of pills to swallow. Apart from the baffling time problem, what were the odds of finding one small group of wights led by a single White Walker ? What exactly were they doing separated from the body of the army ? How easy was it that it just happened that ONE wight was probably not turned by that White Walker and all the others were ? How come it just had to be because the Hound decided he was bored and threw some stones that they all realized the lake had frozen again ? Let’s just skip over the fact that Dany arrives in the nick of time to save them all - that’s a basic rule of all TV shows. But if they showed us a very Harry Potter-esque shot of undead wights sinking in a fiery lake, then how come some were able to come up and drag poor Tormund (kudos here for having us really worried for a few seconds) ? More importantly how did they manage to wrap Viserion in chains? Must we assume that some jumped to the bottom to never return/live underwater and did the whole work and then signalled the rest above to start pulling ? Where did those chains come from anyway ?

Aside from these admittedly minor plot holes, the show’s pacing and emphasis on sheer spectacle is detrimental to its characters and that unfortunately cannot be overlooked. This is why the first part of the episode where the Magnificent Seven do nothing but walk and exchange words is one of the best parts of the episode. It’s been a long time since we had a proper character-driven scene and the show has clearly become better at large scale action sequences than at writing its own characters. Gone were the compelling quiet but ultimately oh-so important exchanges that said little but meant a lot. Here everything is said blatantly, the meaning and purpose very clear and intent on propelling the story forward (with the exception of Littlefinger who continues to babble meaningless stuff while meaninglessly wandering the corridors of Winterfell). This unfortunately means out-of-character behaviors or character misreadings on our parts. Why Jon chooses to bend the knee regardless of what he’s been saying and been told this season regarding the North’s loyalty to the North only is still up to debate. But clearly, this is not being smarter than his father or his brother.

But more than this, the Winterfell storyline is even a better example. After Jon and Sansa reunited last season, viewers were eager to see the rest of the Starks back in Winterfell. Wish granted this season. But with a twist as the siblings behave quite oddly, ranging from blank stares to downright psychopathic behavior. Starting with Bran/Three Eyed Raven who dismisses so easily poor Meera (the girl hardly gets any recognition for what’s she’s done for Bran, from him or his family for that matter), goes on to not hug one sister but hugs the other and casually triggers aforementioned sister’s PTSD. All the while not sharing crucial information about their brother/cousin and also about Littlefinger being the ultimate reason behind Ned’s death. Perhaps that could come in handy in the Sansa/Arya conflict, easily the weakest storyline of the episode and the entire season. After years apart, one would think that you could actually put your childish sisterly bickering behind and work together or at least make an effort. To have Arya act like this is so infuriating that you can’t help but wonder who on Earth thought that this was a good idea. Especially since Arya’s arguments can all easily be debunked. Why the show didn’t go the same route as Sansa and Jon who clearly exchanged their respective stories and instead chose to have Arya and Sansa not communicate baffles me. One would think that is the first thing one would do after reuniting for years. It was already irking when they reunited that Sansa didn’t mention that no she didn’t kill Joffrey but that she was the one who ended the man who took the castle. Here Arya conveniently omits the fact that she also saw Sansa screaming and trying to free herself for her father’s life when he was executed and that she spent a whole season serving Tywin Lannister - living with the enemy and choosing not to kill them all just like Sansa did. Seeing Arya go so far as threatening her own kin’s life when it was made clear last season that she wanted to retain her link to her family is out of character and even if theorists are true in speculating that she was playing a game with Sansa, it’s still a shitty move to make instead of you know… just talking and a rather weak plot device at that, placed here just for the sake of creating drama.

This leads to Sansa sending Brienne away right after Littlefinger points out that Brienne ought to take someone’s side should Arya and Sansa be pitted against each other. The show does not dwell anymore on making its characters’ minds clear. Move forward it must and it’s up to the viewers to guess what their characters are thinking. Jon, Dany, Bran and Arya have all fallen in this blank stare problem but it is even more obvious with Sansa. Because the character itself polarizes the fandom, her unreadable expressions pose more problems than other characters because viewers are more prone to misinterpret the character’s mind. Take her dismissal of Brienne this episode. Clearly, she was intent on having Brienne gone. But it’s not explicitly said why and of course, some are already saying that’s because she wants to kill Arya without Brienne interfering. That people assume Sansa would want to kill her own sister when Arya was clearly the one making threats is beyond me and shows how Sansa is misunderstood as a character. No matter how Thrones shows that she places her family above all - unlike Jon and Arya for that matter - there will always be some misconception about who this character is because of the errors she made when she was a teenager and the unfair hate she gets for it. A more proper explanation is that either she’s playing Littlefinger or that she sent Brienne away so that she wouldn’t have to hurt Arya should Arya attempt something. The most plausible one is that it was just an excuse to have Brienne magically pop up in King’s Landing next week and reunite with Jaime. Likewise, Sansa’s look on Arya and Brienne fighting in The Spoils of War could be interpreted as jealousy. But think about it and it does not make any sense. Jealousy over what ? Fighting skills ? Sansa would have no reason to be jealous of that - she’s never been one to physically fight. That’s not her place. What she showed (or rather chose to not show to Littlefinger) was probably how she was upset that her sister came back as a complete stranger who would more than likely go on the battlefield sooner than later and that yet again, her family would be scattering to the winds. Unfortunately, these interpretations are not the most easily guessed and one has to really put thoughts into it - which is more than most viewers do really.

Reducing the cast in a rather drastic move last season supposedly held more screentime for the remaining cast. While that is mostly true, the show still struggles to balance and write its still numerous characters properly. It helps that it’s able to direct most viewers’ eyes in another direction but really… where is Theon? What of Yara? What’s Euron doing ? Has Melisandre already arrived at Volantis ? Thrones remains one of the best on television right now. Unfortunately, the decision to speed up while reducing the number of episodes amplifies problems that had been so far acceptable. But for all the sheer spectacle the show now excels at, it’s not enough anymore to mask blatant pacing problems and loss of character consistency. Usually, TV shows are asked not to linger for too long. In Thrones’ case, it’s more of the opposite in that it’d be best if they just slowed down a little bit.

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jadehqknb · 7 years

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For the supernatural at event, could I possibly get Hunter Ushijima tracking down and destroying the creature who either kills or kidnaps (your choice) his s/o?

Thanks again to Admin Red! Definitely has the vibe of anepisode of Supernatural but I reallyenjoyed this one! Warning for violence and death!

“Wakatoshi, she’s gone, someone took her.” Tendou’s wordsecho in Ushijima’s ears as he floors the gas, pushing the pedal hard enoughthat he won’t be surprised if he breaks it. The needle of the speedometerprogresses, numbers climbing higher and higher as he attempts with every fiberof his being to get to your last known location before the trail goes cold.

Pulling up to the motel, he throws the car in park thensurges to the room number Tendou provided, his heavy boot making quick work ofthe lock. Inside, his red headed fellow hunter whips around, gun drawn but hesighs in relief as he re-secures it in the belt of his jeans.

“Fuck, Toshi, you have to be more discrete,” he complains.

“Why didn’t you protect her?” snaps the olive eyed male.

Tendou’s eyebrows knit together as a scowl replaces his normaljovial smirk. “She told me to get something for us to eat while she took ashower. Would you rather I didn’t listen? Plus, she’s more than able to handleherself, it must have been blitz attack.”

Ushijima has been in this game long enough to know heshouldn’t be surprised that any number of supernatural assholes would bewilling to resort to underhanded tricks and dirty methods to gain the object oftheir desire. He and Tendou have garnered plenty of enemies in multiple realmsof the earth’s underbelly for him to have no idea where to even start looking.

“Ah!” Satori’s exclamation draws Wakatoshi out of his musings,his narrowed eyes looking at his friend. “Found it.” In his hand he holds apiece of the puzzle, a meaty, blood covered piece at that. Satori smirks. “Goodthink we just bought all those silver rounds.”

Ushijima nods towards the door, steps hurried with Tendouright behind him. If that pack has you, they don’t have a lot of time.

“Can’t leave me alonefor ten minutes, fuck! What the hell kind of hunter am I anyway?” you thinkdarkly, pulling at the chains binding your wrists despite the futility of theaction. Why had you not thought to keep your gun by you at all times? Becauseyou were exhausted and sleep deprived from your last hunt with the boys. Itwasn’t every day you went up against a creature who could give Freddy FuckingKruger a run for his money in terms of dream or rather nightmare manipulationbut really, almost three days without proper sleep would lull anyone’s sense ofguard.

“Anyone exceptWakatoshi,” you amend sighing. Wakatoshi, a man surrounded by his own myth,a hunter’s hunter. And here you were, partner to said legend, kidnapped by abunch of scruffy fucking werewolves; how embarrassing. If you were to survivethis, you wonder if he’ll ever let you out of his sight again.

You’ve known each other for years, ever since you fell intothe hunter life thanks to a run in with a vampire in a dark alley; cliché butsome things can’t be helped. He’d saved you and you’d pledged loyalty to him.At first, he ignored you, outright told you not to get involved and to leavehim the hell alone. But you were insistent, affirming that now that you knewthis world exists you wanted to do your part to contain it, to control it.

And you’d proven your worth over time, mostly on your ownuntil he finally relented to allow you to travel with him and Tendou.

Falling in love with him had not been part of the plan. Sometimes,you think, just maybe he returns your feelings but even after so many long daysand nights by his side, it’s nearly impossible to read him. He’s put up astrong, sturdy wall, the only one of whom has seen the other side of it beingTendou and that’s only because they’re practically brothers, raised by a gruffbut loving widow who turned out to be one badass hunter herself.

A sudden cry pulls you out of your considerations, yourheartstrings pulled when you realize the sound is coming from a very younggirl. If she gets out of here alive, you have no doubt she’ll need years oftherapy just to function again.

“Stop crying!” booms the pack leader out of the darkness. Astartled cry erupts through the rest of the caged and chained humans caught bythis pack.

He stalks up to you, clawed finger stroking under your chinmaking you hiss. “Be more like this one and maybe you’ll meet your end swiftly.”Sounds of terror fill the room but he drowns them all out with his gratinglaughter. His yellow eyes pierce the darkness drawing your gaze despite youreffort not to look. “Or maybe,” he whispers, breath ghosting over your face, “Ishould tell you to be more like them!”He punctuates his words by drawing a hint of blood to the surface of your skin.

You can’t help it, you spit in his face. “Like hell I will,you filthy animal!” you shout.

“Bitch,” he roars and it’s the last thing you hear beforeblacking out thanks to the strike upon your temple.

“So, I take it you don’t want to call for backup even thoughwe know there’s 15 in this den,” Tendou drawls out, sliding his clip intoplace.

Ushijima answers simply, “No,” drawing his modified automatics.He’ll put down every single one of these bastards to bring you home safely.

Satori smiles despite the dark tone of the moment. “She’sprobably just chilling out waiting for us to find her. She knows you’d neverlet anything happen to her, at least, she would if you’d finally tell her howyou feel.” The slight blush upon his friend’s cheeks is enough to tell Satori he’shit the nail on the head. He’s gone long enough, he feels, not voicing anopinion on the matter. “I tried to let things work out in their own time butyou’re ridiculously slow, Wakatoshi.”

“Let’s just get her,” Ushijima says firmly, cocking hisguns.

They’ve found the den thanks to information acquired from anewly turned pup. How Tendou could guess at a creature’s identity is beyondUshijima’s understanding. Occasionally, he’s wondered at whether the red head’smoniker of “Guess Monster” is closer to the truth than not but he’s never had thenerve to ask him out right. Funny, considering he’s fearless when it comes to everythingelse.

Save for the possibility that he may not make it to you intime.

Taking a deep breath, he kicks in the door, two wolvespractically giving themselves whiplash when they look up the stairs at theintruding hunters. A second later, blood erupts from their backs as two perfectshots through their hearts hit their mark.

“Silver bullets are expensive as hell, but they certainlyget the job done,” quips Tendou with a sardonic grin.

A piercing howl announces their element of surprise is brokenbut it doesn’t matter, Ushijima is a perfect shot and nothing is going to stophim from getting to you, from gathering you in his arms, from kissing you and finally telling you how he feels.

Stalking through the corridor, Ushijima shoots everywerewolf he happens upon with unerring accuracy. From behind, he can hearTendou singing some inane song. “Shootthem in the head, shoot them in the heart, doesn’t matter where you start, theyall end up dead.” Sometimes he creeps Ushijima out more than that thingsthey hunt.

From behind another door, he hears wailing and kicks that intoo. The sounds become louder and coupled with them are the unmistakable soundsof growling and yelps. As he descends, he happens upon three people coming upthe stairs. His initial reaction is to shoot them, but his eyes quickly take inthat they’re still human and none have been bitten. He nods in silent directionfor them to keep going and they comply swiftly, rushing out the door seekingexit from this hell hole.

Another human, female and looking to be about twenty, rushesup but this one he stops. “Are there any more down there?” he asks.

“Yes, there’s a young woman, a guy with black hair and abrunette guy. They’re fighting that thing and told us all to run.”

Without another word, Ushijima launches himself over therailing, landing and tucking into a roll so as not to damage his feet andankles. He’s upright in a flash, guns trained on the fight going on before him.He can see the black-haired male struggling with a female werewolf, so heshoots her once in the head before kicking her off of him and finishing the jobwith a shot to the heart.

“Thank you,” pants the male before running out.

Glancing around the room, his eyes long adjusted to thedark, Ushijima can see the carnage of a brutal fight. Blood splatters color thewall a deep crimson while body parts lie in haphazard piles, previous victimsno doubt. The brunette, it seems, didn’t make it.

Lifting his head, he hollers your name, ears straining tohear a reply. A cough draws his attention forward, eyes narrowing as he makeshis way towards the noise. Rounding another corner, his eyes widen at the sightof you sprawled on the ground, clothes soaked in blood and bruises starting toform on your face.

You’re the most beautiful thing he’s seen all day.

“Ushijima-san?” you grunt, doing your best to get upright.

He surges forward, skidding to his knees and drawing youinto his arms. “I’m here,” he says quietly.

“I knew you’d come,” you whisper, a soft smile on your faceas you look up at him.

One of your eyes is already beginning to swell shut and yourlips are cut badly but he can’t stop himself from leaning down to kiss yougently. The action startles you, but you fight through the pain and increasethe pressure, thankful to finally know what it’s like to feel his warm lips onyour own.

The sound of steps breaks the moment and Ushijima wraps hisarm more firmly around you, his other raising his gun towards the entrance ofyour confinement.

“Wakatoshi!” Satori calls, poking his head in to thedarkened room. It takes a moment but he whips his face in your direction andyou can’t help gasping at his gleeful smile as he sings out, “~They’re alldead!~”

A sudden wince from you garners both boys’ concern. Butwhile Ushijima looks in your eyes, Tendou notices the wound on your leg and hisface falls. “Wakatoshi,” he says lowly, “she’s not going to make it.”

“Shut up, it’s just a cut,” Ushijima snaps but your touch easesthe heat of his gaze as he looks back down at you.

“We both know that’s not true,” you say, smiling despite thetears rising in your eyes. Looking at his other hand, you gingerly wrap yourhand around the barrel of the gun and guide it to your chest.

Satori clears his throat, rushing forward to plant a kiss onyour forehead, whispering, “Sorry kid,” before turning around and leaving theroom. You smile at his back, thankful he’s allowing these final moments withWakatoshi to be held in private.

When you meet your gaze back to his, he’s shaking his head. “Ican’t…we,” he pulls the gun away setting it on the ground, “we’ll find a way.There has to be something we can do.”

“This is our only option, you know that,” you insist pickingup the gun once more to hand it to him but he smacks it away.

“I can’t kill the woman I love!” he shouts. You’ve neverheard his voice so loud, so full of passion and it breaks your heart whilewarming it at the same time.

A mirthless chuckle leaves your lips. “Damn you, UshijimaWakatoshi, you couldn’t confess at a more opportune time?” you chide.

“Stop it, stop acting like this is the end. Don’t give up! We’veovercome so much, we can do this! I can save you!”

Your hands clasp his face, drawing him down into a long,passionate kiss. The feel of his hand in your blood-soaked hair makes you moan,heat pooling in your stomach, a longing to have him but there’s no time.Drawing back, you murmur against his mouth, “I love you too, Wakatoshi. That’swhy it has to be you. I can’t…I won’tbecome one of those creatures. I want to die as a human and you have to helpme. Please, help me before it’s too late. I can already feel the transformationtaking hold, it won’t be long now.”

And then, Wakatoshi does something you’ve never seen before;he cries. It’s silent but you don’t miss the tears trailing down his cheeks. Hechokes out, “There’s got to be a way, there’s a cure for vampirism in the earlystages, there has to be one for this too, we just haven’t found it yet!”

“And knowing you, you will,” you input quickly, turning yourhead to cough out more blood, “but it’s too late for me. Now, bring back thebadass I fell in love with and kill me before I change.”

Letting out a shuddering breath, Ushijima stands, picking upthe discarded gun and leveling it at your chest. His eyes go hard, but justbefore he pulls the trigger he says, “I love you and I always will.”

The echo of the shot reverberates around the building and asit dies away he’s left with your lifeless form, alone in the dark.

Outside, Tendou wipes his eyes, unwilling to not be strongfor his friend. He turns at the creak of a step, face set in a grimecountenance as he watches his best friend, his brother, carry your body withtears rolling down from empty eyes.

#ushijima #tendou #supernatural au #violence #death #Anonymous

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