#the second still absolutely kills me
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thinking about how joel was wringing his hands here. the amount of visible discomfort he felt when maria was offering hot showers, warm clothes, houses to stay in- something he was supposed to be able to offer to ellie
he was dwelling in such denial over his fear of being an insufficient caretaker and guardian to the point of feeling physical stiffness in his body and over his face. to the point of claiming that they had been “doing just fine” because his mind couldn’t comprehend the antithesis of such. jackson was the physical embodiment of what he longed to give ellie- real comfort and security- and he struggled with this reality hammering into his head of just how self-sufficient this community was as opposed to him. he was responsible for ellie. he was meant to provide the best for her. and here was someone else who had procured and provided the necessities joel hadn’t come close to replicating
#the second still absolutely kills me#look how discomforted joel looks :( it’s practically washed over his face#oh how the feeling of inadequacy will inundate joel ‘i fail her in my sleep’ miller#oh how malleable this man is to self-loathing#haha i am ill#the last of us hbo#tlou spoilers#joel miller#the last of us#pedro pascal#ellie williams#tlou#the last of us hbo spoilers#tlou hbo
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WTFFF I thought thirteen would be my new girl crush love of my life heart eyes wife you-came-after-twelve-you-must-be-better-than-they're-all-saying bbygirl and then I had to sit down and watch as she told a man who (if he were not a murderer, of course) literally every regeneration before her would've LOVED and FULLY SUPPORTED that "the systems aren't the problem. how people use and exploit the system, that's the problem. people like you" </33333 !?!?
#WHERE IS THAT POST THAT SAID NINE WOULD KILL THIRTEEN FOR BEING A CLASS TRAITOR#WHY WOULD YOU SAY “ERODE PEOPLE'S TRUST IN AUTOMATION” ALL WORRIED AND CONCERNED LIKE THAT???#WHEN DID YOU START LIKING AUTOMATION OVER PEOPLE THINKING AND DOING THINGS FOR THEMSELVES???#AND WHY ARE YOU TRAVELING WITH A COPPER??? WE HATE COPPERS??????#did we FORGET into the dalek?? how about how he treated danny?? god there's so much more I can't even remember off the top of my head#(I understand soldiers are different from cops but c'mon don't even PRETEND twelve would've been any nicer if blue or danny were just COPS)#also a bit off topic bUT MAY I JUST TALK ABOUT ARACHNIDS IN THE UK FOR HALF A GODAMNED SECOND—#I know the companions are usually the ones to do the doctor's dirty work here but like#I just can't see the other doctors NOT having the business man lure the spider for being so fuckin annoying about it#like I was genuinely surprised when they had him do that whole song and dance about not doing it and then he actually just. didn't do it#the doctor LOVES fucking with evil rich business men this is PERFECT. plus why not get back at him for being awful to their companions?#absolutely gobsmacked thirteen let him act like that. I am wrong in thinking that the others would've shut his shit down a LOT quicker??#anyways. I love jodie whittaker and it's just so upsetting to have her doctor do something so wildly off#THIRTEEN PLEASE I HAD SUCH FAITH IN YOUUU I WAS IGNORING THE HATERS AND FOR WHAT#I can SEE the other doctors in her still I can FEEL them they're there she's doing an AMAZING job but. oh my god. what did they make her do#I can't even say she feels ooc as a whole because jodie is bloody brilliant. it's just these... moments. that don't make ANY sense to me...#especially coming off of twelve?? I get the radical personality switch but that belief is a core part of the doctor. or at least I THOUGHT#thirteenth doctor#doctor who#I still love all of you who love her and reading ur posts/fics but I. will not be making any myself. I do not think.
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i don't even like video games so why have i been playing Red Dead 2 for the past eight hours gay
#i think me brain likes the Reward of successfully one hit killing things with a bow and arrow#i was born in the wrong generation (should've been a hunter gatherer)#i dont even care about the story!!! the tutorial / first chapter was tedious as fuck!#im only completing missions to unlock things so that i can Keep Fucking Around!!!#also my horse's name is wizard and if anything happens to her im killing everyone in this game#thankfully when the fuckin. asshole odriscolls Ambushed me i was riding a backup horse i'd just tamed#so THAT one died instead of my darling wizard. but still. cmon#she was a gorgeous buckskin... her name was gonna be Egg... i was on my way to the stable to name her...#BUT YEAH I DONT EVEN LIKE THIS GAME ALL THAT MUCH WHY CANT I STOP PLAYING#maybe my brain is like 'oh my god finally something New. something other than the same shit we've been doing'#killin turkeys and deer#i tracked an elk into a train tunnel AND HIT IT!!#but it didnt die!!! and ran out!!! and then i couldnt find it!!! cmon!!#this game is so infuriating Why Cant I Stop#absolutely unprompted#though i have been thoroughly entertaining myself with my own antics#'i want to be nice to people 🥺'#ten seconds later im killing a man i couldve easily saved purely bc there were no witnesses around <3#well! he would'a talked! i got a camp to protect and provide for!#oh ok yeah i also think my brain likes being able to be a rugged western man w a beard#riding horses and Providing in a slutty little outfit i picked out#most of the game is Such A Drag (as my darling shikamaru would say)#but there are some good bits. addicting bits. sigh#like the allure of open world. optional story. yeah <3#no rules <3
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I’m not crying you are crying yes I’m crying
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How is he not freezing to death
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His fucking eyes 🫠
Come on Barbie let’s go party
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Love the leadmill for posting this story like half an hour before Miles went on 🤣 like for a millisecond I was like huh Alex what you doing
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Love love that SETLIST (and the little commentary about the transition songs and especially “commentary”) (also damn sure it ain’t correct cause there are videos of cry on my guitar and never taking me alive so …)
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Okay but like why he looking so pretty in that BeReal like he’s performing live and still it looks like he’s posing fucking model
I am living for all them Maxie pics
INTERSTELLAR DRESSED IN LEATHER DRINKING BITTER BOY
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She has also uploaded a bunch of videos to her Miles Kane highlight
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Miles slowly waking back up at around 1pm 🫶🏽🤣
#14/12/2023#miles kane#Maxie#Sheffield#Christmas show#please let Alex show; I mean we know he’s in England/london soooo he’s probably at home (his parents) for Christmas#Instagram#also poppy TURNER sorry I can’t breathe#shoutout to whoever did that green room sign#Sheffield. yeah I mean Sheffield is like a second home to me: Miles Kane for Chris talks music podcast may 2022#lol I can’t 🤣🤣 Amanda posted story with Louise and Matt in it and we know with near certainty that Amanda and Matt are currently/mostly#living in LA#so Louise posting her bye Paris and subsequent Eurostar story was a real joke cause she ain’t in England but Alex most likely still is#okay okay getting better so Louise is celebrating her birthday without Alex I’m guessing 😂 cause Amanda posted a dinner pic and there’s no#way Alex is just out of shot#yup confirmed Matt posted a pic from the other side there was certainly nobody but the three of them#max probably a lil overwhelmed with all the love and cuddles he was getting#he kept his promise and played killing the joke 🥹🥹🫠#not Miles still up reposting stuff at 3am 🤣😭#absolutely in love with that BeReal#absolutely in love with all the effort he put into this (and most likely every future) one man band show like with the intro songs ands al#he looks so so happy and god does he deserve it
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”I don’t want to give Jehovah’s organization a black eye so I have to suffer in silence. Oh the pain! The pain!”
Mhm. Have you ever considered that Jehovah’s organization has given you not one, but two proverbial black eyes, broken ribs, and a concussion over the years; and maybe you should expose them for the abusers they are, if only enough to get yourself help to heal from the abuse you’ve experienced? You’ve got Stockholm syndrome bad, and you’re making it everyone else’s problem. You cared about your abusers so much that you abused me in their name, just because I wanted no part of their organization. Even if I didn’t seek out apostate resources, I wouldn’t have needed them to make my decision to leave because of how much you vented about them to me since I was about five years old. Did you just expect me to stay here and take the abuse like you did? I’m better than that; I’m better than you.
#exjw#ex cult#I woke up and he was venting about it to my mom very loudly so I just went “fuck that”#I could’ve went somewhere in the house to eat but I specifically chose the 20 degrees F screen room so that both of them know#I’d rather freeze than hear one more second of his venting knowing that he is still refusing to get help#Mom wants to watch the convention? Glorious. I’m not leaving my room until he’s done talking. I will not be her deus ex machina#I will not be her excuse to end the conversation so she can watch the convention with me#She can sit there and listen to it; and maybe she’ll grow some reasoning ability and realize#the religion she so piously subscribes herself to is splitting us apart and killing her husband#and maybe she’ll begin to take his triggers seriously and not make passive-aggressive remarks about how she wants to listen#to all the comments and not mute it when an elder who sexually harassed him begins speaking#and maybe my dad will grow some common sense and realize that continuing to go to meetings will ensure he is in a state of trauma#for all eternity#and maybe — just maybe — they will realize that everything they read in my diaries was right#and that they were absolutely positively 100% in the wrong for screaming at me about their contents#and apologize for what they’ve done to each other and to me#But that’s wishful thinking because [first name] “I’m more stubborn than you” [last name] will hold out until it kills him#and my mom is ex-Catholic and convinced the JWs are entirely truthful just because she prefers the possibility of death over hellfire#You can’t make this shit up#I live in a madhouse with crazy people
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late night avm doodles. i like these guys.......
#avm#avm fanart#avm purple#avm red#avm green#avm shorts#BOY ITS SO HOT HERE. UGHHHHH. summer is killing me#dnoodles#ay ay ay. anyway. these guys have been living rent free both on alan's desktop and my brain#i still dont have designs for blue and yellow. despite the fact they're like second and third favorites of mine lmao#(purple is most favorite tho <3 this guy can store so much trauma)#anyway when i make human designs. i HAVE to give them the most transgender swag possible i simply gotta.#purple's outfit is like. literally just an alternate version of one of my own favorite outfits. i have a yellow hoodie instead tho.#shows how much i project onto this guy.#sometimes you just gotta draw your favorite characters being comfy and wearing sweaters when youre suffering 32c degrees weather#i also have traditional doodles. might post them. might not.#about green's design. i just NEED to make his fashion sense. nonexistent. its so much funnier#like he's great at everything he does but he absolutely cannot dress himself up. i call it the teruki hanazawa effect.#red is just a little guy i rly love drawing red :)#also the red and pig doodle is based on the bit around the end of the episode The Witch. he's just carrying him on his back :)#why does SC have a halo? well i've decided to give the hollowheads halos in my human designs >:)#yeah okay im done. thank u for reading :) i like these guys a LOT
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Tossing and turning in bed plagued by visions (Ed Edgar headcanons that are definitely just me projecting my cowboy ass autistic interest in strange animals onto him bc he too is a strange southern man with autistic swag)
#atlas speaks#i think he keeps exotic animals. not in like a joe exotic tiger king 'I'm raising endangered mammals that could kill me in my bedroom' way#but like. he has a bunch of venomous snakes and weird spiders. his living room is just lined with shelves and shelves of terrariums#i think you see him interact with his strange and dangerous pets and it's like meeting a whole new person#he is so much less of an asshole the second he is looking at a weird bug#i think he would love camel spiders in particular. those fuckers are so weird he'd love it#and bold jumping spiders. bc they're native to where he grew up#you take him out hiking or some sblhit and he starts acting like that guy on tiktok who hunts for pythons in the florida everglades#he's picking up snakes with his bare hands like#'oh yeah this is a black racer! they're totally harmless but they've got a lot of personality ^-^' while it aggressively bites his arm#he tried showing Bim the David Bowie Huntsman once. he's like 'Bowie is a gay icon Bim'll love this' and quickly learns Bim is arachnophobic#he's waving around cane toads like 'oh my god guys look at the poison glands on this thing!!!'#i feel like he'd love eastern hognose snakes too he loves the silly fucking way they play dead#anyways what I'm saying is give him a educational nature show let him do some weird shit out in the wild it's his natural habitat#he's the types of guy to stand barefoot on the asphalt next to a diamondback to get it to cross the road so it doesn't get run over#I'm hoping releasing these thoughts into the world frees me from them so i can sleep lol can you tell#anyways he absolutely handles like black widows and brown recluse with his bare hands like a madman#he would love eel pit guy#anyways this is his one redeeming quality he is still the worst in every other way 👍
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why am i having to hold a gun to googles head to show me articles on the long term effects of hormonal birth control on the endocrine system in adult patients who began usage as a teenager
#barks#i just wanna know if having a hormonal iud as a teenager fucked with my shit or not#causeeeeee i switched to copper a few years ago and everything was gucci in the coochie until a bad summer hit#lo and behold i call the gyno and she puts me on nuvaring because my symptoms were a sign of hormonal imbalance#meaning i got my ass fucked up from the first iud. right?#fuck if i know i wish they didnt make it my responsibility and then not actually give a shit as to what really happens#the absolute hell you can go through both on and off of birth control is out fucking rageous#'cool my cramps arent as bad but im a raging bitch i want to rob a bank and i want to kill everyone and then myself'#can you please for more than five fucking seconds think about the actual effects these things have on us that arent 'harder to get pregnant#also never listen to anyone that tells you you cant get your tubes tied and still be able to have children down the line#they always wanna bitch and moan about it but its literally reversible just like a vasectomy. not as easy but still possible!#do we get mad at and blame the kitchen counter when a baby smacks their head against it? no. the baby is at fault#tell me why something i have no control over is the reason i have to bear the cross#instead of the dipshit baby that cause the issue in the first place being at fault?????????????????????#im going to burn this world down i swear to god i hate it more every day#the beauty is evident but the horrors persist#hi if you read all of this
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I know we're all going absolutely crazy over the massive amount of Ineffable Idiots content in the new season, but I think we can all agree that the person that's happiest about it is Michael Sheen
#I really hope nobody has made this post yet but I'm still on Ep6 and haven't been on Tumblr since it aired so#Good Omens#Good Omens Season 2#Good Omens S2#Good Omens Season 2 Spoilers#Good Omens S2 Spoilers#Good Omens Spoilers#Tbh I don't even know whether I have to tag spoilers for such a vague post but still#I just shot up out of bed to post this#I would've long been finished with the episode if I didn't have to pause after every few seconds to squeel & write notes about my thoughts#This season is absolutely killing me and I love it for that. It's everything I could've hoped for and more#That being said if sth I want to happen doesn't happen by the end of the season I'm gonna riot#And no I don't mean a kiss bc that is incredibly unlikely and never gonna happen#Edit a bit later: Ha. Haha. AAAAAAAAA#Ineffable Idiots#No idea how I forgot to tag that
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I feel like Jason becomes very protective over his siblings, like even Dick, post-reconcile with the family. Like this man is the Only Fucker that's allowed to fuck with them and make their lives difficult. He actively seeks out anyone that might mess with his family and makes their lives a living hell, and though he does do some shady shit sometimes, he'll always be cursed to care about the batfamily.
#listen idk about yall but jason being the protective second older brother fuels me#especially with the fact that like no matter what universe you look at he always carries fondness for them still even if he hates it#like even if we go by arkham knight game jason in the tapes hes still not ruthless with barbara and asks her how alfred is#and theres reluctance to do these things even though hes angry and hurt because even there his only qualms were with bruce#and he still couldnt kill him#jason throwing hands for his little siblings#jason launching a man for calling dick the ethnic-group g slur and dick having to pull him off the guy to keep him from killing him#jason biting back with words whenever some little prick is giving damian a hard time for being arabic!!!#jason has absolutely no patience for people that fuck with his family#oh my god jason asking one of the girls if they want to handle catcallers or if theyll let him do it#steph has to say no because she knows jason might accidentally kill them even if he holds back#duke doesnt need the protection but the fact that jason stands up for him even still means a lot to him#i need to shut up im talking too much#jaybirdwhistles#jason todd
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ya know, i’ve been aware of how the end of this season of pjo will go but it’s still gonna hurt in the end
#(i’m exhausted & drunk so idk if this’ll make any sense)#but i know that the ‘older brother / caring / protective figure’ that luke was in the second episode won’t stay#i know that he’s going to be a jaded version of himself who is going to try to kill percy#i know he’s going to betray everyone#and yet it’s still gonna hurt like a mf when i see it happen#maybe it’s s bc i believe that there’s a world where he doesn’t go down that path#or maybe it’s bc he’s annabeth’s only healthy older male figure & if i were in her shoes i’d feel so betrayed & broken#bc i also have issues with older men im supposed to trust & how they’ve treated me#but the point is :#seeing luke in the final episode or so will absolutely destroy me#even though i knew before i turned on the first episode that it was coming#luke 🗡️🪽#seaweed brain 🔱💙#pjo : the series#not kpop
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oh so 1x22 really is exactly calculated to make me specifically go fucking feral huh
#im sorry i. jxkdkahyeiwiwkskshdhdjsj#i keep phrasing the start of a coherent post in my head and then getting sidetracked by absolutely fjcking losinf it over something else#jesus. jesus h christ on a motorized bicycle on main street. i was SPOILED for this i KNEW what had to happen and im still gojng BONKERS#what the FUCK#i need to watch like the last 20 minutes of this again right now what the fuuuucl#no actually what i need to do is go outsidr and run some fuckin laps or something but it is the middle of the night. woooargh#ugh. dean. crying wailing#the fact that. sam doesnt notice. he doesnt see anything wrong with john reassuring dean and telling him hes important. because he believes#what demon-john is saying is true.#but DEAN. knows damn well what his father thinks of him.#and then the demon confirms it. they don't need you like you need them. (dean in the motel breathes through sam shoving him up against the#wall says some days i feel like i can barely keep it together - you me dad it's all i've got - )#DEAN ONCE AGAIN THROWING HIMSELF BETWEEN JOHN AND SAM. POSSESSED JOHN OR NORMAL JOHN DEAN KNOWS HOW THIS GOES .#okay if i were to change one (1) thing about this episode i would have the demon pin dean to the ceiling when he nearly kills him. REALLY#lean into the dean mary parallels of it all#GOD. so we agree that sam held off from shooting the second time not because dean going sam no appealed to sam's conscience or anything like#that#sam knew damn well he and john agreed on one thing and that's they'd both die to kill this thing#but sam couldn't do that to dean. because dean's only got the two of them and losing either of them would destroy him#(no. says sam. glances into the rearview mirror at dean blood on his mouth gaze unfocused. not everything.)#natural soup
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???
#my art#white box world#hi. id like to complain some#so like. why cant i make 5 second art#i set out to make 5 second art here#it did not happen#days passed#and like ok thats fine bc i was fucking tired#but still#it was not a little scribble#its still bad art dont get me wrong#but its not 5 seconds#there freak ass lighting that i entirely bullshitted#theres forced perspective? that i entirely bullshitted#that one really kills me like i absolutely did not set out to attempt forced perspective#here we are#and like i guess whatever#i made these guys specifically for thoughtless bullshit and its getting away from me#idk#idk guys#i love drawing his hair#love it so much#I WANNA PUT IN MAXIMAL EFFORT EVERY TIME I WANT IT TO LOOK GOOD I WANT SHADOWS AND MOTION AND WHATEVER ELSE#art is fucked up#im so tired#i wanna follow more cool artists#a lot of them are against ageless accounts#and like i get it!#i really do! but i wanna not do that!#i deeply appreciate getting to be more anonymous but i fucking guess i cant be if i wanna try and have more artist people around
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i will not call out no matter how much i want to (self affirmation) ((not working))
#personal#i’m not gonna call out especially bc i have a chance of doing way less today if i’m on that project again#it’ll still probably be dog shit after 5 and we’ll only have like 3 agents again#which i know means that supervisors is gonna send me that copy paste again that we go through every fucking week bc we only have like 3#agents for 3 hours and i get she’s stressed but if i get that copy paste again just for her to be like no worries take ur time!!!#i’m gonna blow a fuckin gasket and make it so we only got two agents tonight#like is it specifically her fault? absolutely not fuck the company for not hiring more people and sucks she’s the only supervisor for a#hot second that’s not fair on her but flip side she’s burnin bridges with 1/3 agents she has for like fucking hours two nights of the week#like i have no desire to help you at all. mainly bc the message you said is literally fucking copied and pasted#just text me like a normal person!!! hey we’re slammed can i get you back on calls?#hey no rush but much longer on whatever aux?#i think i’d be annoyed no matter what bc it’s not fair nor my fault the company can’t balance agents during the day/night#but the copy paste and the same fucking convo everytime is killing me#and the way she’s the only to message me like this let alone every fucking shift we work together#i imagine she texts everyone this shit im not special but does not mean i don’t fucking hate it#re writing this almost made me call out 😭😭 i got so mad no i have to go in one bc i don’t want to be fired#two bc i might do fuck all today 😭 waited two hours yesterday for a project to review just doing fuck all
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Me going back in time like:
Odysseus: we all agree to fight to defend the marriage to the guy of Helen's choice
Everybody: yeah, sure...I guess if we have to
Me: AND HER RIGHT TO KILL HIM IF SHE WANTS!
Odysseus: ლ(ಠ_ಠლ)
Everybody: ... (☉_☉) (☉_☉) (☉_☉) ...
The Gods: *already planning Troy* (ﾉ °益°)ﾉ 彡 ┻━┻
Helen: ( •̀ᴗ•́ )و ̑̑
#yes I am a little shit#the entire plan started as a way to save Patroclus and Achilles#but then I thought about Helen#she deserved better#Penelope deserved better too#I would also throw so much shade at Odysseus about him being a cheating dick head#and being the mastermind behind the reason his crew got punished but he gets to make it home alive?#absolute bullshit#I would throw massive shade on the 'right' answer being Hestia#With second answer being Persephone just to high five Hades and throw a wrench in the Underworld/Olympus machinery#because no way Hades was going to punish someone who said Persephone was the most beautiful goddess#Also I would spread rumors that I wasn't human and the only way to kill me was to get me to fall in love#Then it would be like 'psych' I'm aromantic#no one would be particularly shocked about what I said about the gods#they just would be shocked that I was still standing having aired so much dirty laundry#and with the river styx bonus -- they couldn't stop me either#river styx bonus#now where is my time machine#patrochilles#achilles x patroclus
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Doctor appt today went okay! I shyly told him how my limbs keep turning red/purple and scaring me, so he took a look and he thinks I just have Reynaud's- nothing scary bad, thank goodness
#pikaposts#medical anomaly blogging#i'm ngl i have been SO stressed abt it i have been. an absolute mess#in the past it was drilled into me that I'm Being Stupid And Ruining My Heart Bc I'm Stupid so i.#get So scared and upset when i experience potentially heart-related stuff#like Oh God Oh No It's Finally Happening My Being Too Stupid Is Catching Up To Me And Killing Me-#which is dramatic! and embarrassing! but boy. i had such an awful doctor she really messed everything up for me#it was like six years ago and it still affects me So Much. sigh#she's second place on the list of people i'd like to hit with a brick
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