#the way they run at me gets me stressed | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kianely · 9 months

Text

i hate this stupid room

like yes, by all means, swarm me with insects and drain all my ammo just before the double garrador room AND THEN MAKE ME FIGHT VERDUGO it’s okay, totally doesn’t make me pull my hair out or anything

#˗ˏˋ ⭐️ – rambles ˎˊ˗#on my first run i died like seven times on the double garrador room omg i suck 😭#thankfully i haven’t died that much on my third run but i’m sure the garrador room will get me #the way they run at me gets me stressed #i mean i guess the entire game is pretty tense but STILL #i’m just bad at conserving ammo…like yeah the melee is REALLY cool but i always like using the guns

9 notes · View notes

stuckinapril · 9 months

Text

friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me

#It’s just so different #even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol #in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps #if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it #esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends #no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr #u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS #meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life #this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation #like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !!#& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers #who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them #and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends #it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me #I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc #like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this #so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works #p

7K notes · View notes

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses · 1 year

Text

*tries to organize my thoughts*

*remembers i'm not in school and therefore beholden to neither heaven nor hell nor any man's grading system*

*joyously shredding & tossing all my carefully arranged 3x5 mental notecards into the air like so much beige confetti. raising my arms in victory, cheering raucously until i accidentally inhale bits of homemade confetti*

(*coughing up itty bits of paper like a cat evicting a hairball with a firm understanding of tenants' rights*) wait wat happens next

#i marie kondoed my thoughts and *i* feel great. but now my stream-of-consciousness has escaped containment #so many innocent bystanders at stake #every time i try to organize my thoughts i run out of plastic bins and have to make a trip to the container store where i get even more dis #racted so. you can't just hand me THIS brain and NO catalogue OR library classification system #and expect me to single-handedly sort through all this nonsense? bad form but fucking form not in my job description #aNYways. formal education sure did a FUCKING NUMBER on us huh #(a number i measure not in gpa or dollars of student debt.#but in the number of therapy sessions & medical debt it will take to recover.)#seriously folks. our education systems are...innately traumatizing for a huge number of students. and we NEED to address this.#the fact that it is culturally common for adults to have anxiety nightmares about school/exams...even decades later?#that is not cute. it is Alarming.#no one--much less entire generations--should be spending their developmental years in an environment of chronic stress & pressure & strain #and yet that is the reality for millions and millions of pre-teen and teenage and young adult students #this isn't healthy and it serves and empowers NO ONE #...except of course the many exploitative educational & financial & debt-collecting institutions thriving from the current balance of power #and of course it's a nefarious and powerful way to sabotage/erase the middle class #which billionaires and the wealth-inequality creators they finance couldn't possibly have any noteworthy interest in whatsoever #it's not like there's an elite group of people with huge financial incentives to drain/steal resources from the masses...#anyways sorry for going all Conspiracy Theory on you.#obviously the billionaires who control the vast majority of our resources and news and political campaign funding #are not tied to every single itty bitty social issue and i'm a silly billy to imply it #please tell elon musk to ignore this tweet i am so subservient and acquiescent #mr musky u r so good at inheriting slavery-built mining fortunes & buying other people's companies #& building rocket ships & fancy cars that do NOT explode/catch fire & also NOT running billion dollar companies into the ground #mr musky u r so talented genius billionaire playboy with 10 kids and ex-wives who find you creepy af babe u r basically iron man

2K notes · View notes

bacchuschucklefuck · 4 months

Text

okay unironically I love so much that porter is like this world SUCKS its BAD here and it HURTS you why do you care abt it!!! and literally every single bad kid is like ngl we just hate ur ass it does not matter what ur philosophy is

#dimension 20 #fantasy high junior year #not art #fhjy spoilers #its!!! gods I will Be My Ass in the tags rn. but thats so like. deliciously setting typical #like porter's desire is to transcend and his contempt for the world he's in feels. idk Real #like he plays the game bc he wants to win and be done with it. how do I word this #yknow. being a god would like. be his win state. when he gets that happening thats it his story is done he checks out #meanwhile the bad kids do actually just like playing the game lmao. like they love adventuring!#theyre so solidly Of This World. they carry the values that can only be born of it and they like having mastery over it #its a meta angle that I think is very fun specifically for d20 being in such a unique position in the zeitgeist when it first started #the rat grinders are from DnD Writ Large. porter wants to escape. but this is the bad kids' home its Their Actual Play Show #which makes it so fucking excellent to me that porter's question is somewhat of merit! its their show and it tries very hard to punish them #and they just straight up dont listen to him here lmao bc they hate him but! since the moment the academic track ended its been clear #that they save the world bc they Like Playing. With Each Others #thats what riz thinks the core of adventuring is! thats why fig stayed! and I also think thats why this hovers over elmville now and #a dead god is coming back in the school gym. porter is a shit evangelist but even if hes a good one I dont think it wouldve worked like he #wants it to. the only way he couldve escaped is if he'd not involved elmville at all. thats where the bad kids met dude #its a shitty place that fucks with them but they all come back here bc they wanna play with each others #and in that regard I think thats what the stress tokens ultimately means. Is This Game Still Fun To Play. ITS A RAGEQUIT LIMIT #Im literally running from one end to another of this conspiracy board Ive pulled out of nowhere #Ill draw after this I just wanna get this out. gods this episode has done nothing but furthering my delusion of grandeur actually #Im the hottest smartest manthing on earth Im king fucking midas over here. anyways uh! great ep!

316 notes · View notes

daily-basil · 2 months

Text

Ok I got a submission about it so I'm gonna do a quick update--

I'M SO SORRY FOR THE LACK OF DAILY BASIL! Literally everyone is busy right now. I am Attempting to make daily-basil doodles in anticipation of reopening the blog, but basically several other mods are either busy, on vacation, artfighting, or otherwise unable to contribute right now

I've been trying to draw some Basils so that I have a few to use when we do reopen the blog entirely but it has been a Struggle. Apologies for the hiatus going on for much longer than I had anticipated oops

- mod snuuy

#i went on vacation and couldnt draw‚ then i forgot my tablet pen there and had to wait for it to be sent back to me‚ it was a whole thing‚#mod omo has been the most diligent mod here and dude thank you so much for that #but between my missing supplies‚ other mods' exams‚ other vacations that have Difficult wifi and little to no art supplies‚#and just general circumstances-- it's been. a struggle #i promise i'll try to get the blog running again as soon as possible !#not basil #mod snuuy #also to note: ive been spending way too much time on the daily basils as of late and it's been making me stressed--#--and building up into a way bigger task than it actually is (and taking more time)#so my daily basils might be a bit shitty for a while whilst i find a way to adjust between ''this is taking five hours a day''#and ''this is a post-it doodle that took five minutes and isnt internet-sharing quality''

44 notes · View notes

hella1975 · 3 months

Text

so there's a reason my new job got back to me so quickly about my application and that's bc it's an absolute fucking shambles like actually perfect timing for me to decide to rewatch the bear bc i have never more felt like ive been thrown into a broke on-its-knees establishment trying to crawl its way up the ladder where i am somehow a godsend to them. my old job was crazy and shambolic in the sense that the industry is just Like That but this one?????? insanity. every 5 mins i am questioning what im doing with my life. ive already had a walk-in fridge moment

#so i explained before that there's 3 venues and on my very first shift they had me doing the restaurant venue for 2 hours #which was FINE like i was a bit cautious bc my manager is VERY stressed all the time and the place generally feels like it's falling apart #not the building itself just. the way it's run like it's just got new owners and the previous manager apparently #EMPTIED THE TILLS AND TRASHED THE PLACE like cost them THOUSANDS of pounds and on top of that #there was beef with the head chef and the new owners that meant he left and took the ENTIRE BACK OF HOUSE WITH HIM #THERE ARE NO KITCHEN STAFF ATM. I HAVE TO LIE AND TELL CUSTOMERS WE DONT HAVE FOOD ATM BC OF 'REFURBISHMENT'#WHEN IN ACTUALITY THE /RESTAURANT/ DOESNT HAVE CHEFS. DO YOU KNOW HOW CRAZY THAT IS #and then the front of house staff are very lacking aside maybe 2 people we're ALL NEW and all of them EXCEPT ME #LIKE LITERALLY JUST ME IM THE ONLY EXCEPTION. ALL OF THEM ARE UNTRAINED #so when i applied with bar training coffee training and very solid waitressing skills they genuinely treated me like a saviour #like i am FENDING off shifts tbh im in a v good position bc they need me too much to get shitty w me if i refuse hours but i can literally #have as many as i want bc they will just give me them. like they're obsessed w me im rota'd for over 60 hours this week #but anyway that very first shift after 2 hours in the restaurant i then walked to the mini golf venue on the OTHER SIDE OF TOWN #and my manager stayed for 30 MINUTES. IF THAT. and showed me around the place + how to close THEN LEFT ME THERE #FIRST DAY HE GAVE ME THE KEYS AND LEFT ME TO RUN AN ENTIRE VENUE. IT'S NOT SMALL EITHER IT'S A WHOLE BAR #AND I HAD TO CLOSE ON MY OWN TOO and ironically the shift itself went rlly well like it was so chill #it was kinda boring but honestly i kinda rated it it's v easy money and the close went perfectly nothing cropped up that i was unsure about #and then. AND THEN. i havent even ranted to my mutuals about this yet bc i was acc so horrified by it but i locked the front doors #and went to lock the gate AND THE KEY GOT STUCK IN THE LOCK. WOULD NOT COME OUT. HELLA VS KEYS ROUND 3927593 #my mum even showed up and tried to help me wrestle this thing out i called my manager and he literally told me to just snap it #bc he'd rather a snapped key that NO ONE could get out than just leave it there overnight but bc of my recent house key moment #i was like AM I FUCK SNAPPING THIS KEY. WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING. so i had to just leave it and at the time #i was realllyyyyyyyyyy beating myself up but my manager is actually rlly nice he's just stretched v thin #and ive also had time to be like uhh actually they shouldnt have left a random 21 y/o girl alone with the keys on her first day #omg i havent even talked about what happened on saturday. ACTUAL SHAMBLES #LIKE THIS /\/\ ISNT EVEN CLOSE TO EVERYTHING! IM RUNNING OUT OF TAG ROOM! IM GONNA REBLOG THIS TONIGHT W MORE PROBABLY!#BC GUESS WHO IS WORKING A CLOSE LATER AT THE NIGHTCLUB THEN OPENING THE RESTAURANT AT 8AM. GUESS #hella slaves to capitalism

21 notes · View notes

hwashitape · 3 months

Text

Your thoughts turn to the pain you've inflicted. You shiver.

21 notes · View notes

squeakadeeks · 8 months

Text

moodboard for this past week ❤️

#they should invent a grad school thats not fucking insane #i'm hanging in there but im the most unwell i've been in AWhile #this week was just horrible #there was already the freezer food incident but it also started off with a very severe pain episode thats putting me in constant woe #even mundane motion has been agonizing which is McAwesome bc we had a lab inspection which involved moving hundreds of pounds of equipment #during which we found a blackwidow and rats which we had to deal with and was a whole thing psychologically on top of the physical toll #the new class fiasco is still popping off and i had to respond to at this point over 400 emails in the fleeting moments outside of lab #AND A STUDENT TRIED TO FINANCIALLY BRIBE THEIR WAY INTO THE CLASS ? ?? ?? ?????#then the instructor wanted to use me as a guinea pig and i had to test new circuit boards but I wasnt given any time to do so properly #i had to test them plus get them operational and deal with my incoming students all in a frantic 10 minute window #im in charge of running our meetings too but the instructor was interrupting and having side conversations that made it really hard-#to train the other people on the new equipment in a smooth manner #which meant that a bunch of people had to keep me after to ask questions which made me late for my drs appointment #where i found out i cant get the new covid vaccine bc my heart and blood levels arnt stable enough #and joanns lost an expensive+critical fabric order of mine+i had to give a big presentation this week on my research that was stressful #and my inbox is still blowing up from being needed all over the place between teaching lab and classes and yall i am. so so tired.#im in so much pain and so stressed out #debating the ethics of turning into a pile of lint to escape my responsibilities and mortal frame

43 notes · View notes

danielnelsen · 19 days

Text

so one thing that does break my immersion pretty badly actually is that i’m playing as origin gale and i let astarion drink my blood and he found it disgusting and said he never wanted to do it again. …….but beyond that, he’s perfectly happy and keen to drink my blood whenever i offer, presumably as the default way he responds to any other character

like. look. i can’t say i mind; i was a little disappointed when he said he wouldn’t do it again. but it’s very much an oversight. if you’re gonna go to the effort of giving him a specific reaction to gale’s blood, then either commit to it or make it just ‘this is weird but not terrible’

#not that i let him drink my blood often. he can get happy from a fight without the disadvantages to me #but i let him bite me when we had sex and it slightly took me out of the moment fjskskfjskd #bg3 #ash plays bg3 #also yeah i’m not playing my own character for my first run. i don’t think ive mentioned that yet #i started a tav game and i was just way too overwhelmed at all the options #and also had trouble feeling part of the world. i know nothing about this universe so i needed a bit more guidance to get into it #plus this makes party selection less stressful and also romance options #AND i get both a cat and a dog at my camp #i’ve been casually observing bg3 fans for a year or however long it’s been out and nobody told me i get a dog??#also nobody told me that gale’s hair is greying and like. 😍😍😍

10 notes · View notes

fuckyeah-bears · 1 year

Text

you know 99% of the time i get nice, totally reasonable, polite, and frequently kind asks on bearotonin. but every now and then i get some asks that just make me wanna reply snarkily so badly lmao

#the weird shit people send me #like unsolicited 'helpful suggestions' about how to run my blog better #or 'concerns' about the way i run it or some of the photos i post #and it takes a significant amount of self control not to be snarky #because i am not allowed to break brand continuity #but like #people really gotta learn that it's not cute or helpful to come into a stranger's inbox and critique/suggest they run their blog differentl #and i get that most of these (admittedly not that many but still frequent enough) asks are probably not meant to be obnoxious #like i'm sure the person who sent them doesn't have bad intentions #and probably just doesn't realize what they're doing is irritating and a basic etiquette no no #but it's still annoying #sometimes people just gotta learn to keep their opinions to themselves #not every opinion should be shared #just being clear 99.9% of the many asks i get are totally fine and nice #but because i get a fuckload of asks the 0.1% of annoying asks i get is substantial enough to get annoying and tiresome #don't mind me im just vague post venting here as a stress relief so i don't reply snarkily on bearotonin #okay im done ranting now #please ignore me lmao #Posts about bearotonin

46 notes · View notes

sonknuxadow · 2 days

Text

google making me mad rn because i was checking again what the release date for sxs gens was and it told me october 22nd . which didnt sound right but i was really hoping it was right . and it was wrong

#i wish it was coming out on the 22nd .....#not in a ''i cant wait a couple more days'' sort of way #but in a ''this game is coming out at a really inconvenient time for me #and it coming out on the 25th means i probably wont get to play it on release'' sort of way #i mean i technically could try placing a last minute pre order at a store near the place im going #but im literally leaving a day or two before the game comes out which is cutting it very close so idk if that would work ...#if it wasnt for that stupid journal this wouldnt be such an issue lmao i really want it </3 #and i think if im going to pre order the least stressful option would be to just pre order it at home and have someone pick it up for me #but then that means i have to wait until i come home a few days after the game comes out to play it ...... which will be so painful ..#i mean it comes with all day 1 copies right? not just pre orders?#but im worried if i dont pre order theyll run out . idkkkkkkk

7 notes · View notes

clandestinegardenias · 22 days

Text

It’s finally dipping below 70 degrees at night and I picked back up the second Franklin Relic Glove!!! Maybe I can finish knitting it by the time it’s cold enough to wear the pair?

#I have been…SO stressed #my stomach has been a MESS #I have a tension headache running from my temple all the way down through my neck and shoulder into my ribcage #the start of the semester is kicking my ASS my mom’s been sick I’m facing big scary life questions like marriage and babies and stuff #thank you tumblr and fandom for existing #seeing you all post and reblog and like my posts sometimes and comment on my fic #and to get excited about knitting a fandom thing #it’s seriously such a balm for me. it’s always a kind and comfortable place I can go to set things down for a bit #so like. I love you all. fyi.#now back to knitting (and watching tennis)

9 notes · View notes

orcelito · 1 month

Text

When a cat gets her claw stuck on something and just tugs at it pathetically while looking at me so I have to just grab her and maneuver her claw free. Because she's so stupid that she doesn't understand that Tugging doesn't free something that is hooked onto something. You must Push.

#speculation nation #this is about my tally btw. only her. i semi regularly have to free her claws from things.#it's not june tho bc generally when she gets stuck she just brute forces it free #tally is a gentle kitty. surprisingly tentative given that shes my outgoing and curious cat.#june is very easily startled and runs and hides at the slightest provocation #but she also throws her weight around a lot more. VERY ferocious when it comes to hunting bugs.#will force her way out of an unappealing situation. whether or not she should be able to.#she also bites all the time. like all the time. i cant cuddle with her bc i just end up getting chewed on.#i still Try to cuddle with her but ya kno.#anyways theyre both dumbasses but tally is somehow even more of a dumbass #despite being the sleek black cat to june's calico. tally is kiki and june is bouba. and tally is the dumber one.#every so often they come with me on trips and theyre in the boxes for over an hour. neither of them like this.#but once theyre freed. well tally is just fine. no grudges no lingering stress. nah shes Exploring!!!#whereas june runs and hides and stays hidden for days. as much as possible. to avoid more box times.#tally forgives and forgets. june holds grudges. theyre both pretty stupid though.

7 notes · View notes

imthatwannabeauthor · 2 months

Text

.

#there is this inherent horrible horrible guilt to me when it comes to money #I can not buy something for me. I Have to convince myself it is for something productive #or it will be used by my family or used with my friends #it cant just be for me for nothing or its all for naught #and i dont know how to explain this to people #i really really dont #because then sometimes people will offer to get something for me but thats almost worse #because then it shifts from the guilt of wasting money on yourself for nothing. a solid 65/100 on the guilt scale #to wasting *someone elses* money on myself for nothing which is an easy 80 or so on the guilt scale and is only worse if it costs more #like see.#its easy when its like christmas because so long as you are about equivelent in money or I am doing more than the other it is good and righ #but as soon as the scale tips there is something horrible in my chest like ive done some great wrong to be righted #you know?#I dont know its just #i feel so strange trynig to ever expalin it all so i just . dont #I just try to circumnavigate it #like like #if i can just pay them back overtime it works out perfect #a lot of times i get really really narvous about this to a weird degree and i genuinely dont know how to get out of it #because when its like way over into the red with someone the last time i got so stressed I started sweating like I was running #and i was breathing weird and feeling lightheaded so i layed down on the ground and just stayed there for a while #sorry to Justice and Charles who will never see this post or explaination and only knew that I got really weird at my own birthday circa 19 #idk #its just one of those inherent traits to me forever and ever

7 notes · View notes

carnivalcarriondiscarded · 1 year

Text

the thing they don't warn you about freshly pierced ears is the Sleep Anxiety

#im so worried about like... irritating them / ripping them out in my sleep #what if they get caught on one of my many blankets or pillows hm...#last night was the first night with 'em and i already had a stress dream #which unfortunately was one of those double deckers where The Demons™️ try to get me #but geez.#i arranged my bedding in such a way that im kinda sitting up and my head is stabilized enough so that i dont turn onto my side #or put pressure on my ~lobes~#thus begins a long couple of months of Healing #cant wait to take these babeys out and switch things up #not that i dont like the ones i have for the healing process!! im very happy with them!!!#but Ough. monkey brain impatient....#absolutely unprompted #i got a uhhh Saline Spray to clean em #and im so worried im gonna run out way prematurely #my depth perception and spatial awareness is a little... Off...#so it takes 2-3 attempts to actually Spray The Piercing #i end up wiping water off of my face and neck lmfao. my hair is Dripping every time #its just a general air of Paranoia #the last time i pierced my ears was years ago and i got a nasty ass infection that put me off of it until. like. a day ago #i was convinced this time bc it was done professionally with a needle and everything #INFINITELY better. lots of fun. i feel somewhat confident that it'll heal correctly #even if my bank account wont. But Its Worth It Tho Its Worth It-#and Yes im procrastinating sleep #my ability to scribble abruptly tanked so maybe ill write a bit instead #see if the artism Transferred

53 notes · View notes

seraphim-soulmate · 1 year

Note

So, what's so great about pigeons then?

oh buddy you are in for a TREAT!! I'm answering this earnestly as fuck. we, as humans, have a rich history with them. they were our little pals for years, helping us with mail delivery and tasks!! so we domesticated them- brought them into our lives, our cities, our homes. and once they were no longer useful to us, we abandoned them :( but they still stuck around because WE BROUGHT THEM HERE !!! they were our friends and i will continue to honor the pact that we made many moons ago. I'd definitely recommend you watch or read some pigeon history to better explain this!! it's part of what got me further hyped about pigeons.

but in another aspect, have you considered that they're animals? like they're literally little créatures that you see almost every day!! and they're beautiful!! not even talking about fancy pigeons but have you taken the time to really sit and admire the plumage of a pigeon? they have crazy iridescence and their colors are just plain satisfying. but back to what i was saying, imagine if you saw any other animal randomly in the city, how enamoured with them you'd be. how crazy that would be!! like think about how people react to seeing deer for example-- awestruck ! try to see the pigeon through the lens of the fact that you're interacting with a Real Life Animal and not just like, street NPCs. they have their own little lives and their mating rituals are ridiculous and their nests are laughable, but they continue to survive along with us. i am so pleased every time i see one of these creatures that live along side with us all. I'm tearing up a little bit about pigeons rn im ngl. I just really love nature and I get to see a little bit of it in my city; even if I'm not seeing an entire forest, I get to see wildlife!!

my friend made a really interesting point recently about city animals and how people tend to detest them. i mean rats, pigeons, and even roaming cats/dogs are often seen like the scum of the earth. but those animals manage to live on scraps, to persevere through difficult conditions, living along side us. is it maybe not a reflection of our hatred towards ourselves that we detest that which manages to live alongside us? that which struggles and fights for their space and right to exist. how are we different from them really? pigeons, cats, dogs. brought into the cities to labor, only to be left in horrible conditions to fend for ourselves.

it's okay if you disagree with this last point, it's moreso philosophical. but i hope i could invite you into a world where pigeons are whimsical, beautiful creatures to admire and maybe respect a bit more! I invite you to look around you with curiosity and interest for what you may consider mundane! you will discover many treasures that make life significantly more bearable.

#personal #friends #pigeons #i guess im really into pigeons now #tbh sometimes i am hypnotized by the way the sun reflects light off the leaves of a tree. i just really love nature.#i literally look up at trees and it makes me smile. like im some idiot in love with trees.#if theres a crowd of pigeons. i will earnestly try to walk around them.#i get stressed when they start doing their little run bcs im behind them. i dont want to scare them!!!#unpeuderose

63 notes · View notes