#theo... my little guy..................... | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mattodore · 11 months

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60 questions with Theo | playlist, pinterest | ->

1. What’s the one thing they would save in a fire?

Theo is a collector and a bit of a hoarder, so there’d be too much he’d try to save. I really couldn’t just say one thing… but I guess he’d grab his memory journal first.

2. What’s their biggest regret?

Not being good enough. Not being lovable enough.

3. How would they fare in a zombie apocalypse?

Theo would do very well up until a point. He’s a survivor through and through, but I do think he’d burn out eventually. He could go a few years before breaking down. When he’s no longer able to repress all of his emotions, the feeling of exhaustion would weigh on him. He’d get bitten soon after, almost on purpose.

4. Where do they see themselves in five years? Ten?

Working for his father for a few decades and later taking over his father’s company. He feels a lot of dread and nausea over this.

5. What’s their most useless, weirdest, or least marketable skill?

He can wiggle his ears.

6. What are they like in the bedroom — well-rounded lover or wooden plank?

Theo is… well. More wooden plank than anything. Sorry, Theo. But, well, he normally goes for more aggressive partners who tend to take control anyway. I don’t think Theo really wants to be all there during sex… it’s one of the reasons why he normally uses before finding hook-ups… it makes him a little foggy and loose. I do think, however, that it’s a little bit different when he’s with women. In Theo’s experience, women treat him kinder… which is one of the reasons why he mostly sleeps with men. He wants affection, sure, but he’s also uncomfortable with it… he’s used to pain. With Matthias, however, this does end up changing. Maybe it’s because Matthias is gentle with him unless he’s asked for it to be rough, or because Matthias won’t fuck him when he’s using, but Theo’s more active when having sex with Matthias. Not a lot of talking, but he pulls and pushes and moves how he wants. After a while, he starts taking control and speaking more.

7. Have they committed a crime before? Which one(s)?

Theo uses drugs frequently.

8. If they were an animal, which one would they be? Which one would they think they’d be?

Theo is a pygmy rabbit or a netherland dwarf rabbit (that temperament… yeah). I think Theo would see himself as… well, a goldfish trapped in a bowl, swimming in endless circles and going nowhere.

9. Do they cheat to win or play by the rules?

Theo plays by the rules, generally speaking. If we’re talking sports, though, he does play dirty. He’s very competitive.

10. What do they fantasize about?

Comfort. A room with a door that locks and will keep him safe all night. A bed on the floor. Blinds and curtains on every window. Matthias’s arms wrapped around him so tight he can hardly breathe.

11. Who’s the most important person in their life?

I want to say Matthias, but it’s his parents. It’s hard for Theo to cut them off, even despite the abuse. I don’t think this changes to Matthias for a very, very long time.

12. What’s their ideal vacation like?

Theo can’t even imagine what a vacation would be like. I think even fantasizing about it would stress him out… he’d just think about how far behind it’d put him academically.

13. What is/was/will be their college major?

Business. Statistics and data. He doesn’t like it.

14. What’s their favorite book genre, if they enjoy reading at all?

Theo doesn’t read for pleasure very often — he has too much reading to do for school — but I think he’s always enjoyed science fiction from a very young age.

15. How would they describe themselves?

Theo wouldn’t know how to describe himself at all. He’d freeze at the question and become despondent.

16. How would others describe them?

Matthias: Lovely beyond words. Intelligent and wry. Shy, pulls away when feelings are too much or too positive. Irresistible. Anxious about things that I could make go away if he'd let me. Lashes out when he gets scared. Strong when he shouldn’t have to be. Soft when he should be hard. Too forgiving to the wrong people. Easily frustrated. Standing on the edge. Endearingly insolent. A mirrored image. Every beautiful thing. Angel. Bambi. Mała myszko.

Everett: Sometimes he makes himself so small… like an injured animal. Jumpy and skittish. But strong, too… impassive when he’s hurt. He’s hiding a lot, but you can see through the cracks sometimes. He needs help, but he won’t let anyone in.

Jordan: Stubborn and headstrong. Naïve or just reckless. Lost. Like a child.

Dutchie: Hard to get to know. Honestly couldn’t tell you much about him despite the years of friendship. Still… you wanna protect him.

Jackson: Fun to be around, y’know… for a rich kid. Troubled, though. Hard to reach. Everyone wants to get to know him better, but… he doesn’t really allow that.

Kavi: Incredibly intelligent but totally aloof. Mysterious. Nose always buried in his books. Cold.

Imani: Too good for Matthias. Sweet.

17. What’s the most ridiculous thing they’ve ever spent money on?

A large collection of delicate Fenton glass bells and assorted pieces. He collects them and stores them in an antique curio cabinet in his apartment.

18. What’s their dream job?

He doesn’t have a dream job. He just does what he’s told and expected to do, which is to work for his father.

19. How’s their financial situation?

His parents have a lot of money. He doesn’t have a job (honestly… he isn’t permitted one). He’s financially reliant on his parents.

20. Who’s their go-to person for advice?

Theo doesn’t ask for advice from anyone.

21. What’s one secret of theirs that could potentially ruin a relationship they have?

If he told his parents that he’s bisexual and interested in men they would cut him off or worse…

22. Are they a dog person or a cat person — or something else?

Theo’s never had a pet before, so I don’t even think he himself knows the answer to this. He likes Matthias’s cat well enough, but he’s never been around many dogs to really choose between the two. I think he really likes looking at fish… I’m iffy on if he’d ever actually own one, though.

23. What’s one childhood memory they’ve never forgotten?

CW for child abuse. I’m talking directly about an instance of abuse. This isn’t vague like I usually am when I talk about Theo’s trauma.

Being beaten for tracking mud onto the rug in his father’s office. His father stood him in front of a full length mirror in the hall and made him watch. If he looked away he would be struck again. If his knees buckled he would be hauled back up and hit harder. It felt like it lasted for hours. Theo had been in the gardens beforehand, an umbrella held over him by his au pair. The dwarf sunflowers had bloomed and in his excitement he pulled off a petal and barreled into the home, heading straight to his father to show him how yellow the petals were. His au pair couldn’t keep up with him, and Theo was always forgetting to take off his shoes when he came in from outside. He was very young… maybe five or six.

24. Do they have any phobias?

Open doors. Windows without curtains or blinds. Locks that aren’t sturdy. Mirrors. Older men. Authoritative figures.

25. What’s one thing they’re utterly incapable of doing without the help of someone else?

Theo is actually very independent. It’s hard to think of anything he couldn’t do himself, because he’s always been on his own, really.

26. What’s one topic they could never get tired of researching or learning about?

Theo is very intelligent, but he’s not actually that interested in learning. He lost that drive and passion at a relatively young age. He’s no longer curious. Hm… I think he might get a little thrill from learning information that’s just… completely useless. Like, think dumb trivia. Still, though… knowledge is synonymous with pressure to him. It makes him feel sick.

27. What’s their favorite genre of music?

Theo will listen to anything. I don’t think he necessarily has a favorite genre. Hm… I think he likes lullabies, though. Quiet music. Calming.

28. Who, if anyone, do they dislike most?

Himself.

29. If they could change one thing about themselves, physical or otherwise, what would it be?

Whatever would make his parents happy with him. Whatever could make him better suited for the part they want him to play.

30. What’s their political stance?

Theo is whatever his parents want him to be on paper, but politically he’s… a liberal, I guess. His party friends, in general, lean left… and they’re definitely influencing him some. However, I don’t think he has the backbone to really go any which way.

This question is a little hard for me to answer with some of the echthroi cast because they’re rich at the end of the day, ya’ know? Materially, politics don’t touch them.

31. Are they religious?

No.

32. What were they like in high school?

He was all over the place. Quiet and then having these uncontrollable outbursts. Fearful. Frequently pulled aside by teachers, being asked pointed questions. Standoffish. Flinching when touched. Far away from the other students. At the same time he was scared to be alone, though, so he would blend in with the crowds when he could. At the summer school he was sent to yearly, the outbursts always got worse.

33. What’s the worst injury they’ve ever had?

I’m going to choose not to answer this one.

34. Do they work to live or live to work?

Live to work. He doesn’t know who he’d be without it. It’s what he was molded for.

35. Do/did they want children?

No. Theo is scared of even the idea of having children.

36. What’s their favorite thing about themselves?

Nothing? I don’t know. Theo… really doesn’t like himself. Maybe his hair, though… his pierced ears… the things he feels give him autonomy.

37. What’s their favorite thing about their significant other, if they have one?

Hm. I think Theo really likes how big Matthias is. He towers over people and is visibly strong. I think that offers Theo a lot of comfort. He feels safe when Matthias is around. Matthias is also very protective, so… it makes it easier for Theo to face his fears. There’s a reliability to Matthias that Theo needs. Matthias cares about him and tells him frequently how much he loves him… Theo’s never had that before. It makes him feel lighter.

38. If they hear something go bump in the night, do they get out of bed to check it out or do they stay put?

Theo is paralyzed but his mind shoots off at a mile a minute. He’s too terrified to do anything.

39. What’s one skill they wish they had?

A photographic memory. It would make his life a lot easier with regards to his education. He’s never thought about the downsides to this… especially as someone with drug and trauma related memory loss…

40. What do other people find annoying about them, if anything?

He can be very cutting and dismissive. He's judgmental, too. First impressions are everything if you want him to even be cordial with you.

41. What do other people love most about them?

He has this magnetism to him that you can’t really put your finger on. I think it’s a combination of how handsome he is alongside the way he keeps himself almost entirely separate from everyone else… you always want what you can’t have.

42. What’s the typical first impression after meeting this person?

That he’s very prickly or just cold… restless… doleful.

43. What do people notice first about them, as far as their appearance goes?

The repressed anger and sorrow in his eyes. Then, maybe, all those beauty marks. The elegant line of his body.

44. Does this person try their best to be honest or are they not above lying to get their way?

Theo isn’t a very good liar, but he’s very good at prevarication and skirts the truth with ease.

45. What kind of movies do they like?

Theo doesn’t have time for movies. Regardless… I think he’d like horror movies. I think… Theo would find a lot of comfort in watching horrible things happen to fictional people. He could fictionalize the abuse he’s faced that way.

46. Are they the life of the party or a wallflower?

I’d say he’s a bit of a mixed bag on this one. If he’s using, he’s the life of the party. If he’s sober, he’s a wallflower. Either way, though, people will approach him to strike up conversation and ask him to dance.

47. Are they an early bird or a night owl?

Early bird. Theo doesn’t actually like the night. Does he still party until three in the morning? Yeah. But… well. Theo tortures himself in many different ways, doesn’t he?

48. Are they a good kisser?

He’s not bad at it, but he never really kissed anyone until Matthias. So… he’s not amazing at it or anything. He’s learning as he goes.

49. Do they think about what they wear or do they throw on whatever they find first?

Theo definitely plans out outfits. I think he has three separate lives he’s living and three separate fashion senses to suit each of them. He dresses very typically masculine and rich when he’s with his parents. He dresses down for university but incorporates some elements of his nightlife wardrobe on occasion. He experiments more with sexuality and gender for his nightlife fashion… I think this is what he would prefer to wear all the time, only with a less dramatic flare.

50. Do they have any insecurities?

I could be contracted to write a trilogy about Theo’s insecurities and would meet every deadline with ease. The underlying root of all of his insecurities is his belief that he’s unlovable and dirty, though. Let’s keep it simple with that.

51. What is their favorite thing about themselves?

A repeat question. I’ll add onto my last answer, though, to say that I think he has some days where he feels really good about his appearance and some days he doesn’t. He’s temperamental.

52. What’s their diet like?

Theo eats whatever is made for him and will finish all of it even if he dislikes it or isn’t hungry. He doesn’t have any favorites, but he really dislikes candy or sweets.

53. If they could only eat one thing for the rest of their life, what would it be?

Again, he doesn’t have anything in particular he likes. I guess something easy to eat would be the answer… maybe mangos.

54. What’s their body count, if they have one?

I think he has sex very regularly… on average I'd say once a week unless he’s studying too intensely for a break or his last experience was a really rough one. He doesn’t always sleep with new people, either. The faces blur, though. Hm. I can’t say an exact number and Theo wouldn’t be counting anyway.

55. Who do they look up to most?

The blurry image he has of his childhood au pair.

56. What do they smell like?

Copying things I’ve mentioned previously here… Theo smells very clean. Think green and fresh… a little powdery. He doesn’t often wear cologne, so he mostly just smells like soap — not even his body lotion is scented. He doesn’t like strong or chemical smells on himself. As a signature he’d wear a spritz of Francis Kurkdjian’s Aqua Universalis. However, Theo will also wear Gucci’s Tears from the Moon, which was a gift from his mother, if he’s at family events — it’s outside of his preference but that’s neither here nor there.

57. How do they feel about drugs?

…Theo is an addict. He doesn’t get clean for a few years and relapses multiple times. He relies on them but he also wishes he’d never touched them sometimes, usually when the guilt floods in after he’s sobered up from one of the outbursts he’s had because of them.

58. If they could change one thing about their life, what would it be?

Hm. I’m going to bow out of answering this question as well.

59. What motivates them?

A desire for recognition, acceptance, and love.

60. What are some of their simple pleasures?

Collecting knickknacks. Cold showers. The wind whipping through his hair when he sticks his head out of the window of a car. The sound of the windchimes outside his bedroom window. Odious purring on his chest. Matthias’s voice in his ear.

#river dipping #ts4 #theodore doe #echthroi #oc extras #a burning house to live in #s: echthroi #cw child abuse mention #for this cw i wanna be clear that i talk specifics of an incident for one question (i also give another warning for it before the answer)#cw drugs mention #really out here blogging just for myself bc seriously who's reading this except me #it's nearly 3k words in google docs... what can i say 😌#theo... my little guy.....................#i looped his playlist the entire time i was answering these questions for him so i was bouncing off the walls #i honestly always want to do the ask games i see on here but my avpd kicks my ass so when i saw this one the other day i was like #why don't i just answer all of the questions and post 'em to the extras tag without the actual ask element #it was a lot of fun and also kind of agonizing....... honestly i might do this again if i see another ask game that interests me #also revealed the third nickname matthias regularly calls theo... i think it's obvious why someone like him would call theo that gkfhjfnh #pointing to hierophant by king woman in matthias's playlist like . what else did we expect #okay....... onto rereading matthias's answers and then i'll post that one and go back to catching up #updating the pic of theo from this WEEKS later bc i can't believe i let theo's hairline look like that............ anyway

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hella1975 · 7 months

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hiiii haha. hello. exceptionally awkward introduction bc idrk how to start something like this so let's just jump right in. im taking a break from this account for a bit. i know i said i wanted taob out before halloween and currently im fine sticking with that deadline, but if i decide i need longer away then i will take longer away. every time ive reassured people that id never abandon a fic and updates will always come eventually i never once considered that my writing and ability to feel safe and comfortable on this site would be actively taken from me, so im not even going to apologise. i dont want this either and more importantly i dont fucking deserve it. i dont know what it is in the past year, if ive hit a certain amount of followers or 'popularity' that's made it so the natural ratio of positive to negative interactions must in turn go up, but there's been a serious uptick in weird asks for me. the annoying part is that a very small amount of them are actually objectively mean and hateful, the rest are just weird and invasive from people who seemingly dont realise that's what they're being. ive reached a point where i dont care if the intentions are good. it's not my job as a 20 year old tumblr user of all things to defend the morality of someone who couldnt even bother to come off anon. unfortunately, after blocking only one or two anons, the weird asks have decreased substantially, which says all you need to know about the fascinating and exhilarating lives led by these people, but ive also gone on to turn anon asks off entirely. this is something i actively fought against doing and had to be pushed into by my mutuals (who have been the coolest people on planet earth during this entire thing). turning off anon was a big deal to me even if it sounds silly. i felt betrayed and like id been backed into a corner because it was so vehmently something i DIDNT WANT that to feel like i had to do it anyway for my own mental health??? that sucks. so even though ive 'fixed' the problem, im still kind of reeling and uncomfortable every time i come on tumblr. i hope it's just something i need time to ease because i'll truly be devastated if this becomes 'ruined' for me. tumblr exists as the only place in the world where i am honestly every facet of myself without shame or hesitation; losing that would be insanely harmful to me. and to the people who cant appeal to the actual human behind the post, let me put that in words you can understand: we wouldn't get any more writing 😦😦😦 riots and fires and sirens, i know. so yeah. to anyone who has sent me an anon ask and you're now wondering if you were part of the problem, im firmly of the belief that you'll know if you are. when i say 'weird asks' i dont mean 'you sent me a para about your personal life just to vent or ask for advice' or 'you sent me a really deep emotional compliment about the impact me and/or my writing has had on you' - i love asks like that, so much that i put off taking a break and turning off anon solely for the joy they bring me. im sorry that it might feel like you're being punished too bc of the actions of what in reality is a HANDFUL of weird people, but this is what i feel like i have to do to feel safe and not go insane every time i log in. love you guys, hopefully ill see you soon x

#seriously another shout out to my mutuals #id particularly like to say thank you to boom who's always right there for me no matter what's happening or how insane im being #and also everyone in our little discord that wound up having to make a whole new channel for venting #bc i was there so often like 'today's weird ask isssss.... telling me about my cupsize!! rip them to shreds!!!'#hannah and theo especially being there and pushing me to finally turn off anon. war is truly over #and of course rori bc the shamelessness u show when hating on my anon asks has been genuinely really cathartic #sometimes u really do just need a rottweiler mutual to tell random people online to kill themselves 😭#okay weird oscar acceptance speechcore gratitude over. i do just rlly love my mutuals #like i went three years not telling anyone about the worse side of internet popularity for fear of looking spoiled and ungrateful #so for the first time to open up about it and be met with outrage on my behalf and people saying in fact it's MORE fucked up #than i initially realised bc ive grown desensitised to it is. yeah cathartic i guess #they are singlehandedly reassuring me of the good this cursed app still holds #so everyone thank them and send them flowers NOW #okay im done i think. see you guys soon. i truly do want to come back asap bc like i said i NEVER EVEN WANTED TO FUCKING LEAVE #SOME ASSHOLES JUST HAD TO PUT GRENADES ON WHAT I ASSUMED WERE VERY UNIVERSAL AND OBVIOUS BOUNDARIES #if you're reading this like 'ohhh fuck i defo sent something invasive lately. i thought it was a joke/we were friends'#then 1) we arent friends if you're on anon. it immediately creates a power imbalance where you know me and any necessary context #but i have no idea who you are or how much you know about me. that's already a fucked dynamic #and 2) I HOPE YOU FEEL BAD. LIKE GENUINELY I HOPE YOU FEEL AWFUL AND HAVE A GOOD LONG LOOK AT YOURSELF #okay i think that's all. ta-ra lads??? how tf do u end something like this #ive queued this to reblog a couple more times throughout the day

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