#they act as if most straight movies don’t include two friends or acquaintances who have feelings for each other

[castielinpastel]

it’s really frustrating how people can get mad at us for shipping characters together and say stuff like “oh okay, so no one’s aloud to be just friends anymore” and then turn around and do the exact same thing with a straight pairing.

[starfirette]

shadowhunter boys as boyfriends

GENDER NEUTRAL READER | I didn't put the TLH kids (Matthew, James, etc) because the series isn't over yet and as of right now, they're still, for the most part, on the older teenager side. I'll do a Shadowhunter Girls version soon because I need Jessamine and Emma content

Including the Herondales, Lightwoods, Magnus Bane, Jem Carstairs, The Blackthorns, and Kieran.

Herondale

William Herondale is a protective boyfriend, as well as a loudmouth. He thinks he's the best because he's got you. Probably compares you to the other significant others of his friends, in the sense that you're better than everyone else. "Please, you put so-and-so's outfit to SHAME last night" "Oh, so-and-so couldn't kill a sprite if they tried, you've singlehandedly taken down shax" "will, the shax put me in the hospital..." "who the hell took it down, then?" "that was you, dear" "oh, aha, yes that's right. Well, don't feel too bad about it, love". Please just shut him UP

Jace Herondale is the kind of boyfriend who acts like he's totally independent and doesn't need to spend all his time with you, when, in reality, he feels miserable when you aren't around. "Y/n would love this shirt." Alec would tell him to buy it for you. Jace would scoff. "How corny." Alec would say 'Fine, then don't get it.' Jace would keep talking about it until Alec purchased the shirt himself, forcing Jace to gift it to you. Of course, Jace acts like a cool guy about it. "It just reminded me of you, that's all..."

Lightwood

Gideon Lightwood is the childhood bestfriend to lover. You're the one he confides in about everything. He didn't even realize he'd fallen in love with you until your family was on the verge of marrying you off. Gideon would probably stay quiet, letting you go on with the arranged marriage, until everyone around him finally explained how awful that actually is, and you're probably in love with him, too. Once Jem pointed this out, Gideon practically jumped out the window to get to you. Luckily, Jem was right.

Gabriel Lightwood is the childhood enemy to lover. You're the one he hates, and vehemently swore to never be friends with. Well one summer, your family left for a vacation in Idris. You returned for the Autumnal Equinox, all tan and gorgeous, and Gabriel realized you're actually really hot. It all goes down hill from there. He would definitely have been drawn in by your looks at first--but he DOES fall in love with you for real.

Alec Lightwood would never tell you he likes you ever. He'd rather die than confess his crush. You weren't exactly his best friend, but you were more than an acquaintance. Good luck trying to drop hints that you like him, too, because he's too salty and emo to realize that you'd ever like him back.

Carstairs

Jem Carstairs........how can I possibly explain my love for this man? Jem is a perfect gentleman. Probably coerced into marrying you by Charlotte, for his sake of health and safety of status. She truly wants what's best for Jem. And you're a good match for him!!! In this case, arranged marriage but you two fall in love.

Bane

Oh, to be the lover of Magnus Bane. You probably met him in the most absurd of ways, like a crazy meet cute in a rom com. He spoils you, buys you gifts to win your affection; doesn't accept it when you tell him no more gifts. He just wants love. You two probably elope and forget to tell people until a month or so after it's happened. Maybe even a year later. "By the way, we're having a one year anniversary party and you're invited, Tessa."

"???? What?"

"Oh, haha, yeah, we got married one year ago! So we would like, like, a Kuerig or something."

Kieran Kingson

Kieran just straight up asks you to be his mate one day. It's a strange moment. it's the middle of breakfast, you're exhausted, and Julian won't stop bitching about the iPod you supposedly stole and then lost, when really you just borrowed it and broke it during patrol. Kieran comes in, sits down; he says his good mornings to the family. Then, "Oh, by the way Y/n. I'd like you to come out with me for dinner tonight."

The clatter of the morning stops as everyone pauses and waits to hear your response. He'd apologize in private but extend the invitation a second time. He wouldn't have an issue saying he's attracted to you and even has a crush. He's nice about it, and not at all awkward. You, however, are very awkward.

Blackthorn

Mark Blackthorn adores you. He approaches you in private. He's super dramatic about it, too. You thought he was going to tell you someone was dying. But no, he just thinks you are, in his words, "glowing with beauty". Okay dude. Just kiss me already. You would be the couple that's always making out or going at it. He cannot keep his hands off you.

Julian Blackthorn is the opposite. While he adores you just as much, he's calm and doesn't feel the need to go full throttle into marriage, like his brother would be. Julian wants to have one normal experience in his life. He wants to have a movie worthy relationship, with stolen kisses and first dates and awkward hand holding. He feels so comfortable with you.

[winetae]

⇨ wall to wall (02)

↳ 1.2k preview. read the first part here. 

:: female reader x jhs

:: smut, porn star! au

:: ~18k

:: sex work, insecurity, jealousy, slut shaming/objectification, boyfriend!jimin, filmed role played scenario that includes: d/s dynamics - dom!hoseok, anal sex, sex toys, erotic massages, humiliation, porn dirty talk, squirting, lots of cum (and oil!)

It physically pains you to admit it but Seokjin’s worrying isn’t unfounded. Your career is stagnant, your projects predictable and boring. You’re not bad at your job, but you don’t stand out amidst the sea of pretty girls hoping to make a name for themselves.

There’s no guarantee that Director Ryu’s new project will be as successful as the first. You’re no stranger to false hopes; there’s a chance that Seokjin’s wishful thinking might never amount to anything. Even so, you want to give it a shot. Not trying feels too much like giving up and giving up is not an option you’re willing to consider, not when you’ve already put so much on the line.

.

.

.

.

They’ve really gone all out this time, you muse as you cast a cursory glance at your surroundings. A small, electric waterfall fountain sits in the far right corner and crimson colored scented candles are dispersed all around the elaborate massage parlor set-up, dousing the room in a cosy, amber glow. It’s a surprising sight because porn sets are famous for never focusing on the details. Viewers are here for the sex, not the generic backdrop of a rented room or hotel suite.

Director Ryu vehemently protests.

“That’s precisely what sets apart my works from your average pornography film. I want the viewer to be completely immersed in the movie they’re watching. Porn is too constricting and underwhelming a word. What I’m creating is a feast for the eyes, one that leaves a lasting impression after consumption.”

“Ah... Yes.” You try (and fail) to sound impressed.  

“People want to believe the sex is real, even if it’s just for an hour.” He sighs deeply, sounding pained, like explicating such a simple fact isn’t worthy of his time. “They need the escape and it’s our job to make it happen. A few extra candles might not make a colossal difference at first glance. But that’s where you’re wrong! It’s never been about the candles. It’s about the ambiance! The visual experience!”

It’s a pity the new budget doesn’t extend to your wardrobe, you remark internally as your gaze drops to observe the stylists’ pick of the day.

For the upcoming scene, you’ve been instructed to squeeze into a tight, baby pink shirt that stretches obscenely over your bust like something straight out of a frat boy’s wet dream. Inwardly, you congratulate yourself for hitting the gym religiously because your clothes—or lack thereof—put everything on display. The cotton material of your shirt is so thin, you’re surprised the stitches haven’t popped out, while the denim bottoms you sport are so tiny that you could hardly qualify them as shorts. Although—you suppose that there isn’t any use debating over semantics. It’s not as if they’ll stay on long enough for it to matter.

The scenario that you’ll be acting out today is pretty straight-forward. You stop by the parlor to cash in a voucher gifted by a generous and thoughtful friend. Hoseok, who plays the role of an erotic masseuse, gives you a deep tissue body massage worthy of a five star review on Yelp.

Director Ryu is extremely proud of the pitch. His spectacles glint as he pushes them up the bridge of his long nose.

“We’re gonna call it My Bare Lady. Haha, get it?” He gloats. “It’ll be different from our last shoot - the both of you aren’t supposed to be acquainted with each other at all. In fact, there won’t be any romance. We’re aiming for something new because as artists, it’s our duty to reinvent ourselves every day. Complacency is the enemy of creativity.”

At the mention of Hoseok, your gaze flits over in his direction.

His brown hair, two shades lighter than the last time you’d run into him, is swept to the side, giving him a professional and tidy appearance. He’s swapped his workout attire for beige scrub pants and a matching shirt. The color compliments the glow of his tan and the cut of the uniform is flattering to his figure. Diretor Ryu’s speech continues despite your wavering focus.

“—visual stimulation. That’s why one shouldn’t underestimate the proper use of props. A believable setting sets the tone for the rest of the scene. If you don’t believe the role you’ve been given, then why should the audience?”

“Mhm,” you nod here and there but you’ve long stopped paying attention to his one-sided speech.

Your eyes linger on Hoseok’s arms and the dimples that appear every time he laughs. You’re not the only one who stares. A small group of admirers flock to him like bees swarming around a rare and exotic flower.

You’d noticed it before but today confirms it; Hoseok’s presence is riveting. It’s not the first time today your gaze has strayed his way. More than once, you find your eyes drawn to him like a moth to a flame only to quickly avert your gaze whenever your eyes meet. Each time, the right side of his mouth quirks into a half-smile, the beginning of a question forming on his lips.

It’s embarrassing to be caught red-handed gawking but, in your defense, you aren’t the only one who ogles him—and many of them are far less discreet than you try to be, some gazes curious, others downright lecherous.

It bothers you. What exactly do you and everyone else find so fascinating about his character? He’s good-looking, sure—but you’re no stranger to handsome and pretty co-stars with nicely shaped dicks. You can’t put a finger on what sets him apart from the rest.

The gaffer comes over and momentarily interrupts the flow of Director Ryu’s monologue with a personal inquiry. Thank God. You use the opportunity to slip away, grateful that someone has put an end to your misery. As thankful as you are to the director for the career opportunity, you could do without his long-winded speeches that never seem to end.  

“Hey, Hoseok.”

His smile widens, the corners dimpling the moment he spots you. “Hey! It’s been a while. Who would’ve thought we’d get to work again so soon, huh?”

“I didn’t think our last movie would do so well, honestly.”

Without its success, who knows what kind of movie you’d be participating in right now? Another re-hashed version of ‘BABYSITTER GETS CREAMED’ type scenario, most probably.

“I guess that’s a testament to your acting skills, right?”

You smile back, sheepish but nevertheless pleased. It always feels nice to be complimented, especially on days like today when you’re feeling less confident than usual.

“You changed up your hair.”

“Yeah! I thought I needed a change.” He threads his fingers through his locks self-consciously. “It looks fine, right?”

“It does!” you agree with an enthusiastic nod.

Jimin, who had insisted to be present on set today, hovers on the edge of your periphery. In the back of your mind you know he means well—that his presence is meant to be a source of support and security. On a typical day, you’re relieved that someone you trust is close by in case the situation escalates. While you’ve never had any horrific experiences, there have been the occasional uncomfortable encounters behind the scenes. Thankfully, Seokjin or Jimin have always stepped in before whichever entitled asshat could get too handsy.

But for the first time, his presence doesn’t comfort you the way it usually does.

.

.

dun dun dun cue the porn and the drama 🤪

[fortitudina]

                DETAILED CHARACTER BIO QUESTIONS.

Name: Cillian Diarmuid Brockhurst ( Kye-Lan )

Nickname(s): Ci ( Kye ), Brocky, Snipes.

Name significance/meaning: Cillian ~ This name has several known meanings, including “war,” “strife,” and “bright-headed.” The word cille also means “associated with the church,” so the name is often associated with the word “church” or “monastery.”

Gender: Male

Age: 32

Birthday: 11th November

Deathday: ~

Star Sign/Astrology Sign/Zodiac Sign: Scorpio

Location: Los Angeles

Birthplace: Los Angeles

Ethnicity: Irish-American

Nationality: American

Race: Caucasian

Physical Appearance: Clean cut and well presented average height male with brunette hair and blue eyes.

Skin Tone: Sandy-Tan ( https://www.schemecolor.com/skin-pastels.php )

Complexion: fair, smooth & soft.

Eye Color: Old World Blue ( x )

Natural Hair Color: Brunette

Height: 5’10” / 1.78m

Weight: 77kg / 169 lbs / 12st 12lbs

Body Type: Mesomorph

Build: Muscular / Athletic

Posture: Healthy [ x ]

Birthmarks: Strawberry mark on his right hip.

Scars: Gunshot scar on the right side of his chest & left side of the hip region of his abdomen. Stabbing scar to his abdomen and one on the back on the right hip area. One on the back of his neck.

Left Handed/Right Handed/Ambidextrous: Right handed

Age Character Appears to Others: 32

Dyed Hair Color: undyed

Usual Hairstyle: Short

Tattoos: Army tattoo on right bicep

Piercings: none

Makeup Style: ~

Clothing Style: Smart-casual

Clothing Size:  Chest ~ 32inches / Waist ~ 26inches / Hips ~ 32inches

Shoe Style:  Steel-toed boots, sneakers, oxfords.

Shoe Size: 10

Nail Appearance: short, well kept.

Eyebrow Shape: Straight ( x )

Features: Soft features overall; perfectly symmetrical 

Face Shape: Oval

Facial Hair: Light stubble

Voice: Deep

Distinguishing Feature: Smile

Extrovert or Introvert: Ambivert

Personality Traits: Cheeky, Compassionate, Loyal

MBTI Personality: ESFJ-A

Optimist or Pessimist: Optimist

Temperament: Cheeky disposition

Mood: Cheerful

Attitude: Positive

Strengths: Caring, Kind, Giving

Flaws: Blunt, Hero Complex, Brash

Mannerisms: Smirking, quirking of eyebrow, cheeky grins

Habits: fiddling with pens or small objects

Morning Person or Night Owl: Morning person

Pet Peeves: idiots, bad lying, loud eaters, slow people ( walking etc )

Favorite Sin: Gluttony

Favorite Virtue: Patience

Weakness: Loved ones or friends & colleagues getting hurt / involved.

Strengths: Sharp-shooter, Skilled hand-to-hand combat.

Expressiveness: strong use of both facial expressions and hand movements.

Ruled by Heart or Mind: A little bit of both; more heart though.

Mindset: Positive

Philosophy:  “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit”

Motivated by: Food, Justice, Happiness.

Everyday Speech: “The past is behind, learn from it. The future is ahead, prepare for it. The present is here, live it.”

Life Motto: “Don't count the days, make the days count.”

Energy Level: High

Memory Level: Eidetic (Photographic) Memory

Disabilities: none

Phobias: Incredibly small spaces. 

Addictions: Does pizza and poptarts count?

General aptitude: Fluid Intelligence

Mental Strengths: Problem-Solving, Psychoanalysis, 

Mental Weakness: Not a Genius 

Physical Strengths: Physically fit, keen hand-eye coordination, 

Physical Weakness: weakened cervical vertebrae from an old injury during a tour in Afghanistan

Past Illnesses: Chicken pox twice as a kid

Major Surgeries: Surgery to pin his cervical spine. Surgery to remove various bullets.

Accidents: Had several bumps and scrapes whilst at work.

Stability: Very Stable

Allergies: Pollen, Shellfish

Job Title: Detective

Company: LAPD

Career Type: Police

Education: High School, Military, Police Academy

College: ~

Work Ethic: Hard-working

Job History: Sniper in the Army, Beat Cop, Detective.

Income: $74,000 per anum

Political Party/Organizations: Doesn’t do politics

Volunteer Work: Helps at the Veteran’s housing association.

Dream job: Got it

What job would s/he do poorly at: Doctor

Career satisfaction: Love the job

Diet: Coffee and any food easy to grab on the go

Favorite Foods: Poptarts, Barbecue-based, Chicago stuffed crust pizza.

Favorite Drinks: Coffee, Beer, Cranberry juice.

Favorite Movie: Top Gun

Favorite Music: doesn’t really have a favourite

Favorite Book: doesn’t have time to read

Favorite Place: Does bed count?

Favorite activities: Running, Shooting, Cooking

Favorite time of day: Morning

What makes them happy? Catching the bad guys, seeing friends & family happy.

What makes them sad? Losing someone close to them.

Hobbies: Shooting, Running, Cooking, Singing

Interests: Films, Artwork

Favorite animal: Hyena

Loves to do: Wind people up and be cheeky

Hates to do: Paperwork

Inspired by: Former Army Colleagues

Raised by: (family) Mother and Father

Parent Status: Married ~ alive

Mother’s Name: Siobhan Marie Brockhurst

Mother’s Age: 63

Mother’s Background: Irish

Father’s Name: Patrick James Brockhurst

Father’s Age: 68

Father’s Background: American

Relationship with Mother: Close

Relationship with Father: Okay..

Parenting Type: Strict

Only Child? One of Three

First Born, Middle Child, or Youngest? Middle

# of Siblings: Second of three siblings

Relationship with Siblings: Close to brother; Distant with sister

Extended Family: ~

Family Relations: ~

How has family life shaped the character? Helped to both break him and make him who he is today

What they like most about their family: They will all get together for holidays and birthdays

What they dislike most about their family: The religious side

Children: Nil

Pets: Two Dogs

Best Friend(s): Doesn’t have one.

Worst Enemy: ~

Many acquaintances or few close friends? Few close friends

Sexual Preference: Any

Orientation: Pansexual

Relationship Status: Verse Dependent 

Marital Status: Verse Dependent

First Love: Carlie Anne Vaugn 

Current Love or Aspiring Love: Verse Dependent.

Notable Ex-Lovers: Azrael Mortem

Top 3 Loved Ones: ~

Top 3 Disliked Ones: ~ 

Who knows the character best? Eoghan, his brother or Lupita, his work partner.

Childhood: Cillian had a fairly stable upbringing; his parents in a strong marriage and with an older brother to help teach him the ropes, Cillian did well during his early school years and thrived in all of his subjects.

Adolescence: As he got to high school, he joined the football and soccer teams; being rather sporty as a child meant his fitness was impeccable. When he finished High school, instead of going to college, Cillian got in with the wrong crowd and ended up being arrested for Breaking and Entering and several counts of theft.

Young Adult: Went through Military training then, Cillian’s Regiment was sent to Afghanistan where they served three tours before he was shot in the Line of Duty after going through Hell being tortured with one of his comrades.

Adult: After being medically discharged from the army, Cillian took a year out for convalescence before joining LAPD. Given his history with the army, he soon shot up through the ranks until he became a Detective. He will also play the role of Police Sniper/marksman if they have to go into particularly tough situations that require an overwatch. 

Moments/Experiences that shaped them: Getting into the wrong crowd after High school. Being sent into the Army. Being captured and tortured during his final tour in Afghanistan. 

How have they changed as a person throughout their life? He has matured a considerable amount and become regimented and organised as an adult, with a respect for the law and bringing justice.

Major regrets: Getting involved with who he did as a teenager and ending up getting arrested.

Biggest life lessons learned: Don’t get arrested.

Religious Beliefs: Catholic

Upbringing: Strict & Religious

Core Values: Dependability, Consistency, Loyalty, Reliability, Integrity.

Morals: Always tell the truth, Treat others as you want to be treated, Be dependable, Be forgiving, Have integrity, Take responsibility for your actions, Have patience, Be loyal, Have respect for yourself and others

What does s/he believe is evil? The force in nature that governs and gives rise to wickedness and sin.

What does s/he believe is good? Morally excellent; virtuous; righteous; pious

Risks Worth Taking: Those that keep both the city and loved ones safe.

Important milestones: Making Lieutenant in the army. Reaching Detective in LAPD. NOT DYING whilst in both the Army or LAPD.

Achievements: The Purple Heart as a result of his capture & suffering endured during that time.

Failures: Getting Arrested as a teenager

Lifestyle: Busy

Character Traits: Hard-working, Brave, Compassionate, Honest, Successful, Fighter, Mischievous, Thoughtful, Sassy, Humorous, Helpful, Independent, Loyal, Courageous, Responsible.

Culture: 

Main Goal: Have a long and happy life, full of hard work, fun and family.

Minor Goal: Drive the damn car at work.

Desire: There are several.

Biggest mistakes: Getting in with the wrong crowd.

Life lessons: Not everyone is going to like you.

Dream Life: The one I have now

Worst Nightmare: The Hell I endured whilst on my final tour.

Favorite Memories: Winding my brother up. Making Detective. 

Least favorite memories: Getting Tortured

Things they want in life: Family. Love. Fun.

Things they don’t want in life: Suffering. Pain. Heartache.

What obstacles are currently in their way? Work.

Any secrets: Yes, but if you think he’s going to tell anyone, you’re idiotic.

Worldview: It’s just a little bit fucked.

Personal Hero:  Former Sergeant Major. 

Internal Conflict: Questioning if he’s good enough for his job at times.

External Conflict: Seeing the scars upon his body and being reminded of each event; wishing he could get rid of them all.

What others think of them: Fun and loveable; a genuine and caring guy. 

What they think of themselves: an idiot; not good enough. 

What they wish they could change: What they did in the past.

What they wish they could have: less strict father.

What gets them fired up: Liars. Suspects who think they’re clever. 

Their definition of a good life: A steady job with a family and friends surrounding them.

Risks worth taking: Anything that keeps both family and friends safe.

Things they take for granted: Coffee. Beer. Time at times.

What inspires them: Seeing justice get served. 

What they have doubts about: being good enough.

What makes them feel alive: The thrill of the chase.

What makes them want to do better: Any case they do not solve / Criminal that doesn’t get a guilty charge.

What do they want to be remembered for? Being a good and loyal man.

How will the character change? He might become a husband or a father? Perhaps even Lieutenant or Captain of LAPD some day.

[sooghostwriter]

Bodyguard

Pairings: Do Kyung Soo x OC

Genre: Mature,  Romance, Angst (But not love angst), Smut in future chapters

Warnings: Main character under trauma.

Summary: Ae Ra is a singer who has been receiving threatening messages and letters for a while now, but she didn’t give them importance. Until one day the sender decides to act and kidnaps her. It’s then when her agency decides that she needs protection, so they hired two bodyguards for her. Mister Do and Mister Park.

Chapter 3 

After almost an hour, Mister Min walked outside her room with his cellphone on one hand and another cellphone in the other hand. He appeared flustered, but Kyung Soo could swear he looked taller “Everything is settled, I need to go to the agency right now to re-negotiate some contracts, I leave her under your care, she is going to sleep now” Kyung Soo bowed at him as he dashed to the elevators, but saw in surprise how he walked back to where he stood “How did you do that?” He asked pointing at him with one of his phones “Do what sir?” “She does what you say, that surprised me from the beginning, but this! Tell me, how you convinced her to take this break, I have been working with her for 6 years, and she only took a month off to finish her piano studies in England, what did you say to her?” Kyung Soo went over his talk with Ae Ra, and there were a lot of things that he said that could have pushed her in to take this decision, but he was sure that it came from inside her, he just showed her the possibilities. And also, he wasn’t going to tell someone else about the talk they had. It was a private matter of hers “I don’t think I said much, I just showed her that option…and after everything that happened, I think she was wishing to do this” Mister Min nodded, accepting his answer and walked away nodding to himself “Mister Do!” He shouted from the elevators, calling his attention “I like having you here!” Kyung Soo bowed at him, trying to control his smile.

++

Ae Ra’s room was now filled with cute boys. Baekhyun was right, she did have a harem. 

Sehun was packing her suitcase, Chanyeol, Kyung Soo and Baekhyun were talking in a corner of her room and Minseok was flat ironing her new light brown hair “Are you really so scared of taking a break?” He asked over her shoulder, as she bit her thumb “Yeah, this is very new to me, I have been working like this since I was 17, first training, then when I debuted… I haven’t taken a break ever, and now is so strange because the instructions from the agency are to come back whenever I feel ready, when is that?” Sehun answered as he sat on top of her suitcase so he could close it “Whenever you feel like you are ready, is not that hard to understand”

“Yeah, the day you feel like you need to be back on stage is the day you come back to Seoul” They made it sound very simple. In fact, the harem made all this look very simple. As soon as she went out of the hospital, Baekhyun rented a house in the countryside. She was planning on going to her parents’ house or a hotel in Jeju island, but they had different plans “No, you need fresh hair, you need good food, animals, mountain, fireplace, you need earth, and you need us, that’s why we took some days off so we can come to you and help you settle” Her make-up artist informed her three days ago, and now he and her bodyguards were planning the meals they were going to have. Sehun was opening a second suitcase to put all her clothes in and Minseok was massaging her hair with some fragrant oil. 

She announced in her social media that she was taking a short vacation. She didn’t look the comments, scared of what she could find there. Her agency got a lot of calls from magazines asking if it was related with her current situation and they answered that - It had to do with it, but it wasn’t the only reason- Mister Min didn’t touch the issue, he was all smiles. And that meant good news because that man didn’t know how to fake a smile. So if he was happy, it was because there were reasons not to be worried. So, when she walked out of her place with her backpack and her guitar, she only focused on not slip on to the wet pavement. She promised herself that all worries were staying there.

Mister Yo borrowed them one of his cars and they drove for 5 hours to the small village were their temporary home was. Chanyeol and Kyung Soo sat in the front since they were driving, and the rest stayed in the back.  A part of her was getting very emotional with the idea of this trip. She never had this kind of trips. She did travel a lot, and in the company of those three guys, but it was for work, so there was always some stress involved. Train her voice, go over her choreography and work on her next record as she was touring with her most recent one. Traveling for work was never really traveling. But now there was none of that. This was the beginning of her vacation.

They arrived on a two-floor house at the foot of a hill. There were three’s around it, hiding it from the highway, and chickens and ducks walking around. Chanyeol parked the car in front, and gave them a signal to stay there “Kyung Soo and I need to go first to check the house” They all nodded at the same time and saw the two bodyguards walk inside the house and move around opening curtains and checking the locks of all the windows “Hey Ae Ra, is it true what Mister Min said? That you decided to take this vacation because of something that baldy told you” Ae Ra looked at Baekhyun a bit agitated, why did he know that? “Don’t call him that, and yes, he convinced me” “Wah, and he convinced you about telling people about the attacks too, wah, he has a lot of influence in you uh?” She looked at him not quite grabbing the mining behind the way he formulated his question, word-wise, and tone wise. Behind him, Minseok and Sehun were nodding, holding their laughs “Cut the crap, what are you implying?” “You like him” Answered Sehun, moving forward, grinning stupidly at her “You like your bodyguard” She felt the sweat forming in her lower back and nape. She felt her ears go red, and the chuckles from her friends confirmed her that she was must surely blushing “We are not messing with you, we are on board” Minseok told her, trying to control his giggles “Yeah, but just so you know, we will try to get you two alone during this vacation” Baekhyun stuck his tongue and avoided a swat from Ae Ra “I swear to god, if any of you makes it weird, I’m getting a new staff, got it?” “I’m open to lose this job if it means that you are getting a boyfriend” He joked again, but this time Ae Ra was faster and she hit him straight on the head “Hyung, stop it, look, we are supporting this, but we promise that we are not going to make any of you uncomfortable, not because of you, but because we are scared of him, and everybody calm down they are coming here” Sehun came back to his previous position, and the three of them went serious. Ae Ra was the only one still in shock. And she didn’t even have the opportunity to deny the accusations. Because she had to, since they were false accusations. The opening of her door brought her back to reality, and the first thing she saw was Kyung Soo offering his hand to help her go down. She could feel those three traitors biting back their laughs behind her “I’m ok Mister Do, thank you” He nodded and took back his hand, making way for her to go down. Of course, as soon as she touched land, her left ankle betrayed her and she ended up landing in Kyung Soo’s arms, which by now were definitely used to catch her before her face landed in the ground.  He, as the eternal gentleman, only helped her regain balance again. He didn’t comment on her blushing or her embarrassed silence. But she saw out of the corner of her eye how the other three, including Chanyeol, were looking away, hiding their laughs from her and Kyung Soo’s view.

That afternoon they focused on organizing everything. Fill the refrigerator, distribute the rooms and unpack. As soon as she was ready, Chanyeol came to check on her. And for some reason he explained to her why he came in and not Kyung Soo “He is preparing dinner now, so I came instead” As if he was apologizing. Or she was just being paranoid.

After dinner, they watched a movie and then went to sleep. They were all very tired and had plans for the next morning. Baekhyun promised a river and animals. She put her pajamas on, and before she went to bed, Baekhyun came to wish her good night and give her a tight hug. That night she was able to sleep. It took her an hour, yes. But she didn’t wake up until the next morning. She had a couple of nightmares, but nothing too terrible.

Their first three days went by slowly. They were completely relaxed, enjoying life with no worries. She took long walks with her friends, devoured the food that Kyung Soo cooked for them and read the books she brought with her. It was a nice bubble to live in. All those things kept her away from the worries outside. There were moments when she completely forgot why she was there. Only at night, she would remember. The nightmares refused to leave. But she realized that every night they lost a bit of strength.

It was clear that for Sehun, Baekhyun and Minseok, Ae Ra was more than just the girl they work with. They treat her like a little sister in every sense.

Chanyeol and he were the same. There was a distance between the three of them, mostly because that’s how they planned it on the first place. She still called them Mister and they called her Miss, but that was only a formality. Chanyeol would call her Miss Ji, and then joke about how lazy she was. Of course, Kyung Soo didn’t go that far. He just stayed on the background. Laughing with them of course, talking with all of them. But always looking and earing, answering only when requested. That was just his personality. He was the quiet one. At least around strangers or acquaintances. He liked that about himself though. It made him more observant. And during the last days there, he did that. Observe.

Observe Ae Ra closely. He had seen her at her worst, and he was making sure how she was evolving. He was pleasantly surprised. The first thing he noticed was the lack of visits to the bathroom. She was enjoying her meals happily and after she was done she just stayed seated at the table or go somewhere with her friends. No more vomiting, no more lump on her throat. That was the best sign he could see.

She looked less afraid too. One time the lights went out for a minute as she was washing her face in the bathroom. He dashed to the bathroom in case she needed help, but he stopped at the door after he could hear her humming. The light came back soon after, and as he walked away from the door, a small smile on his lips, he heard her say “I’m okay” Kyung Soo’s smile grew wider.

It was clear she wasn’t sleeping well, she was somnolent most of the time. And a couple of times when he walked outside her bedroom past midnight, he heard her whimper in her sleep. But he knew it was going to be like this. If anything, Ae Ra was recovering very fast. Trauma is a toxic disease that takes quite a while to go away. He knew that. He has seen it. But Ae Ra was strong, he knew that much. He suspected it just by seeing her as a fan. But now that he met her in person, he was sure.

It was Thursday and Sehun had to leave because of work. Kyung Soo prepared a farewell meal with Sehun’s favorites dishes. He looked a bit giddy when Kyung Soo asked him what food he liked. Kyung Soo liked Sehun. He was a good guy. A big softy. He was making Ae Ra laugh all the time, as he was paying attention to her well-being all the time. He was very funny and he made a good match with Chanyeol. He felt a bit sad with the news of him leaving so soon, that’s why he decided to cook for him. Chanyeol and Minseok were going to drive him to the train station after lunch. That morning, as he was starting to prepare lunch, Ae Ra came into the kitchen offering help “I’m not a good cooker, but I know how to use a knife, so can I help you? I want to thank Sehun somehow” He accepted happily, asking her to chop the green onions. Thanks to her help, lunch was ready sooner than expected. Before they started eating, Ae Ra raised her glass to make a toast and everybody at the table quieted down “Before our Sehun goes, I’ll like to thank you guys for being here with me, supporting me” She said looking at Baekhyun, Sehun and Minseok “And taking care of me” She said looking at Chanyeol and him “Thank you, that’s all, I’m not good at this, I’ll write a song, that’s easier for me” They all start laughing clinging their glasses together “Of course we are going to be here with you, I can’t trust that you would take care of your hair, and also who was going to trim Kyung Soo’s hair” Minseok added, patting Kyung Soo in the shoulder, and he involuntarily passed his hand over his head “Thank you for that” He answered shylly “Is ok, your hair does grow quite fast though, you are very masculine uh?” Chanyeol laughed next to him, and as he turned to hit him, he saw Ae Ra smiling nervously.  He noticed that she always did that when Chanyeol messed with him. He didn’t know why. He was glad they all enjoyed his cooking. It was modest, but they all prize it fervently “Miss Ji helped me, so she should get some compliments too” He answered, a bit embarrassed “I only cut stuff, you are the one with the gift” She winked at him, and Kyung Soo felt a rush of heat move from his nape, around his neck and then down his chest. That was one of her signature gestures. She always ended her tv performances with a flirty wink but getting one live was very overwhelming. He laughed shyly, and everybody around him laughed at him, or with him. Soon after they were done with lunch, Chanyeol and Minseok left with Sehun to the train station. When Sehun came to say goodbye to him, he gave Kyung Soo a short but tight hug and said to him “I’m sure you will keep taking care of her, thank you for that” and patted his arm fraternally. Kyung Soo only nodded at him, copping Sehun’s gesture. They both smiled at each other before Sehun walked inside the car. After that Ae Ra went upstairs to fetch her book and left him and Baekhyun at the living room. He was going to offer him a coffee, but he excused himself “I’m going to go for a run” He said and went upstairs to his room. Before he went into the kitchen he heard some mumbling at the stairs, followed by a strident laugh from Baekhyun and an exasperated shriek from her. She appeared at the kitchen door just when he was putting the coffee inside the machine “Want some coffee?” He offered. She only nodded and went back to the living room. He added one more coffee spoon to the filter and waited for it to be done.  He already knew how she liked her coffee, and he felt a weird sense of proudness because of that. He walked into the living room holding both coffee’s and left hers in the coffee table in front of her. She was sitting on the couch, relaxed, with a book and a notebook on her legs. She thanked him for the coffee, taking a sip from her cup “Perfect” She mumbled to herself, and Kyung Soo felt that weird sense of proudness again. He sat in the couch just in front of her, without anything to do. It was about to get uncomfortable, at least for him, when Ae Ra draw his attention to her “Mister Do, I weight myself today, I gained 3 kilos” She could barely control her smile, proud of herself “Congratulations, I have noticed that you have been eating better” She nodded enthusiastically “Yes! I feel better” “What about sleeping?” “Mmm…is…still tricky, is not as hard as before, but I have a lot of nightmares” Kyung Soo realized this was the first time in a while they sat down to talk. He felt a strange familiarity with the current situation. He was glad she was sharing all this with him, mostly because that meant thrust “What happens in those nightmares?” She looked at the notebook on her hands, playing with the cover “I’m writing them down, once we are back at Seoul I want to start therapy, and probably they will be interested in them…they are quite random, is like all my fears or traumas from childhood are coming back, all my insecurities show themselves in my nightmares, so there isn’t a clear pattern, some of them are kind of ridiculous, some of them are terrifying” “And they keep you up during the night” “Most of them, sometimes I wake up terrified, sometimes…so…sometimes…something happens in the nightmare and everything gets fixed so I don’t wake up” He was dying to ask what happened, what change those nightmares into dreams, but he saw how suddenly she got nervous, stuttering, so probably she didn’t want to share that part “You are having those nightmares every night?” “Yeah, but some nights are worse than others, which gives me a bit of hope…right?” He nodded, it was a good signal “Coming here has helped you, Miss Ji?” “So much, I know that Baekhyun brought me here to isolate me, sooner or later I have to come back and probably I’m going to have a relapse, but I also think that he brought me here to create a cushion, so whenever I feel terrible, I can just come back here, at least in my mind” They exchange a smile and Ae Ra went ahead “I’ll remember the time he fell into the lake, when Sehun freaked out because of that sheep, and when Mister Park almost fades because of that cricket on his pants, I’m going to remember waking up to that beautiful view outside my window, share breakfast with all of you, enjoy the delicious meals you prepare, write in peace, read, laugh…this has been overwhelmingly beautiful, sorry” Her voice broke at the end, and his heart clenched. She tried to hide her crying, but it was late to control it. Kyung Soo was fast to hand her the box of tissue. She apologized to him, and he was clear to make her see that she didn’t need to apologize “I’m just very emotional lately, yesterday a butterfly got into my room and I cried for an hour because of how pretty it was” “Miss Ji, that is totally normal” She thanked him again and grabbed another tissue to clean her tears “I’m glad you decided to go to therapy, everybody around you is doing all they can to support you and help you, but there are a lot of things we can’t do or say, and there’s also a lot of things you can’t share with any of us” She looked at him, her eyes big, a bit swollen and red by the crying, but dry now “I’m doing the right thing right?” “Of course” She smiled brightly, and he mirrored her smile “Thank you for sharing this with me Miss Ji” “No, it’s me…I have to thank you Mister Do” They could be like this the rest of the afternoon, so Kyung Soo accepted her words and changed the subject “For dinner I’ll cook whatever you want, to celebrate your weight gain, what do you want?” She giggled shyly and took a second to think about it “I think this is the first time I celebrate a weight gain, we have to celebrate it right? Then I want fried chicken, can you cook that?” “Of course, I’m going to call Chanyeol and tell him to buy some fresh chicken” He got up in search of his phone and left her free to do what she had planned. As he was speaking with his partner, he saw her seated at the couch, writing down things on her notebook, her smile refusing to leave. His too.

+++

“Ae Ra?” She heard a whisper calling her name “Are you up?” It was Baekhyun’s voice from the door “Come in, what happened?” Baekhyun got in, closing the door behind him, and sat next to her in the bed “Nothing, I wanted to chat with you, what were you doing?” Ae Ra showed him the book she was reading, and he scrunched his nose, taking it away from her and leaving it on the nightstand “You can do that later, I came to gossip about you” “Baekhyun is not gossiping if it is about me, and if it is about Mister Do I’m killing you with this pillow” “Oh come on! Tell me, what did you guys do yesterday when we left you alone?” Ae Ra was suddenly shocked by his words, the we in it was so suspicious. We, as in we plan it, we executed, we are dead “Baekhyun, please don’t tell me you planned this” “No…” He hesitated “No what?” “I didn’t plan, it was Sehun and Chanyeol…and me and Minseok” Ae Ra grabbed the pillow she was going to use to kill him and stuck it to her face just to hide her shout of frustration. They were all dead to her, even Chanyeol. She felt how Baekhyun was giggling next to her, so she shouted into her pillow again “Come on, stop it, if Kyung Soo hears you he will get super worried” She threw her pillow at him, and in his attempt of dodge it, he hit the back of his head with the wall. She felt so happy when it happened “I can’t believe you got Chanyeol involved too, he is his partner!” “Ok, that’s why I came to gossip, of course I want to know what you guys did yesterday, but I’m sure nothing will come out from those lips, so here is the gossip” “Baek…” She warned him, but he ignored her “This is the thing, Chanyeol didn’t need to go with them, I could have go with them, or only Minseok right?” He waited for her answer, but she only stared at the wall with her arms crossed, and he ignored her completely “But Chanyeol proposed that idea to us, we give it the thumbs up, and then when he told Kyung Soo about him going with Minseok he wasn’t against it” “So?” He gave her an exasperated look “You know him, he could have said no to him, don’t go is unnecessary, because it is! He came out with a lousy plan and a lousy excuse, but Kyung Soo accept it” “Please go to the point of all this” “He wanted to spend time alone with you dummy!” Ae Ra laughed bitterly, shaking her head “What about you?” Now her friend was the clueless one “What with me?” “Technically he and I weren’t going to be alone, you stayed here” “He knows I go for a run every other day at that time, he is like a freaking CIA agent” “So your gossip is that he wanted to stay alone with me” He nodded smiling sassily and Ae Ra pushed down the giddiness that the idea caused her. She took a deep breath and then turned to Baekhyun “Look, It was really good talk to him, he listens and gives advice like no one, and that’s all I’m going to say, but I don’t like this…childish behavior of planning things and talking about us behind our backs” “Us?” He joked, moving his eyebrows up and down suggestively. Ae Ra was done “Leave” Baekhyun got up faking fear, laughing all the way to the door, and before going out, he looked at her and repeated “Us” Doing that thing with his eyebrows again. Ae Ra grabbed the book she was reading and threw it to the door. Baekhyun laughed again and dashed outside the room and closed the door.

++++

Sunday's in the countryside were as lazy as in the city. They got up late, except for Kyung Soo and Chanyeol obviously, and they move from couch to couch watching movies. After lunch though, Ae Ra got a rush of energy and felt like dressing more presentable and go out for a walk. She came downstairs and her friends were still lazing around in the living room playing video games in the TV “I want to go for a walk” She said, “Go then” Answered Baekhyun changing positions on the couch next to Chanyeol “No one is coming with me?” She saw how Kyung Soo looked at Chanyeol in silence for a couple of seconds but was ignored by his partner “Kyung Soo, could you go? I’m about to destroy Minseok here” Ae Ra didn’t miss the look Kyung Soo gave to Chanyeol, it was hard to decipher though. She was able to read the faces Baekhyun and Minseok though. She was about to lose it. Baekhyun was laughing mischievously, trying to hide behind a pillow. And Minseok’s grin was really getting into her nerves. Thank god Kyung Soo distracted her by patting her arm “Let me go for my cellphone and jacket and I will be with you” She couldn’t find her voice, so she only nodded. Her friends were about to say something, so to save their friendship she walked to the door.

He was thankful to his friend. He just wasn’t planning on recognizing it to his face. Ever. Is not that he was wishing to be alone with her. It’s just that more than a week with his partner and her friends was like a lot, and Ae Ra was peaceful, not like the clumsy giraffe of a friend he had. He didn’t want private time with her. He wanted private time. Just that. Ae Ra wanted to walk up the hill and hopefully reach the highest point. He liked the idea, she promised a beautiful sunset from there. It was a very easy walk. Not too steep and with a very clean and safe path to follow. Also, Ae Ra was very agile. She had good reflexes and her steps were light and fast. She was quiet too. Only commenting on the flora and the noises around their path  “Are you afraid of any animal Mister Do?” “No, not at all, I love animals” “Then you must like it here” She said, stopping to catch her breath “Very much, this morning a couple of ducks were at the kitchen door asking for food, I was so bewitched by them, they were so cute and yesterday afternoon when Chanyeol and I went for a run we met a herd of sheep’s, and their owner had just shear them, they looked very cute” She smiled at him the entire time, crunching her nose “I can tell you really like it here because you just said a lot in one go” He felt a bit embarrassed all of the sudden so he started walking ahead “I always talk a lot with you Miss Ji” She laughed behind him, reaching his side “That’s true, I was being unfair” They started walking side by side, slower this time since the top of the hill was closer. They walked in silence, but Kyung Soo saw a permanent smile on Ae Ra’s face, and he was carrying the same smile on his face. The owners of the house and the land where the hill was located, had taken good care of it. At the top of the hill, under a couple of tall trees, there was a set of seats made with wood. They were just in front of an opening where you could see the big expanse of land around the house. This was the first time he was seeing this “Is beautiful, isn’t it? When I came here with Baekhyun the other day I cried” She laughed at her own statement, but it made sense to him. He wasn’t about to cry, but his chest felt tight with emotion. Ae Ra took off her backpack and sat at the benches patting the space next to her, inviting him to take a sit. He slid next to her, taking the bottle of water she offered him “Isn’t it nice to work with me, I bring you to nice places, see?” “I have to recognize that despite…you know…the rest, working with you is really nice” “Yeah, despite all that” She said looking with disdain to the side “Hey, don’t think about that” “Don’t worry, I wasn’t…I haven’t think about it actually, not too much” She took a long sip from her bottle and hold the water in her mouth, moving it from one side to the other “I’m curious though, I wonder if the police found anything during this days” “If you want we can call Mister Min and ask him”

“I would like that, curiosity is killing me” Kyung Soo took his phone from his pocket, so he could make the call but she stopped him “Not now Mister Do, don’t ruin the moment, let’s call him once we are back at the house ok?” She was right. Good news or bad news could interrupt the relaxing encounter with nature they were having now. Kyung Soo put his phone back in his pocket and sat more comfortably on the bench, enjoying the bright green landscape in front of him. This was really a view and an environment he could get used to. This view and this air could help anyone feel better. Kyung Soo needed to thank Baekhyun for having the brilliant idea to rent that house and bring Ae Ra here “Mister Do?” Kyung Soo looked at her, and she was handing him an earphone “I want to listen to this song, but I feel rude putting on my earphones and leaving you out, wanna listen to it with me?” He grabbed the little red piece and put it on his ear. She looked for the song on her cellphone, and he focused on the view in front of him again, it was impossible to get tired by it. He heard her whisper ‘Found you’ excitedly and the music started playing. And Kyung Soo froze.

He knew that song, he knew that song so well. “I wrote this song when I was 20, I was going through some terrible things, my grandma died, my manager left me after he got in an argument with the agency, there was a terrible rumor regarding me and a possible unwanted pregnancy and to top it all, a classmate exposed my terrible math grades, I was scared, sad, angry and embarrassed, all together, and one night, after I cried my ass off, a sat down and I wrote this song, but it was too personal so I put it at the end of the record, is not very popular, although I always sing it at my concerts, but is the song that fans comment to me about the most” Kyung Soo was listening in awe. He didn’t know any of that. As she said, the song was the last one of the record, and it didn’t quite fit with the rest of the songs. He always thought it was a filling song. They were one song short, so they just threw it in. He didn’t know it carried a deep meaning for her. She kept listening to the music, staring at the sky and Kyung Soo couldn’t move his eyes away from her. He was witnessing such an intimate moment. But he didn’t feel like an intruder. They were sharing it. That song meant a lot to her, as it meant to him. But she didn’t know that. And he felt like she should. She deserved to know. Since he started working with her, Ae Ra has opened her heart and mind to him. Always looking for a light to follow on his words. But he wanted to tell her that her words were a light on the path of someone very important to him. That her words, helping his friend, helped him too “I know this song very well” He said, loud enough to bring her focus to him. She immediately searched for his eyes “You do?” She asked surprised “Yeah, actually, this song turned me into your fan” He admitted, looking at his hands, feeling embarrassed “Please tell me” She turned off the music and took the earphone from his ear. She turned around on their seat, facing him, giving him all her attention. Kyung Soo felt a bit uncomfortable under her stare, so he kept his eyes fixed on his hands “Some years ago my best friend, who is like my brother, got into a car accident and lost the movement of his legs” “I’m so sorry” She sounded really sad by it, so he smiled at her, showing her that it was a matter of the past “It was very hard for him, he was depressive, he didn’t leave his room, rejected therapy, didn’t want to use a wheelchair and at one point, became suicidal” “Kyung Soo” He heard her whisper, and felt her cold hands grab his “He is fine now, don’t worry, but it was so hard, and I didn’t know what to do for him, because I knew that the reality of people around him, the ability they had to walk and run caused him great pain, he didn’t want to see me, they hospitalize him and two weeks passed without being able to see him, then one day I get a call from his sister that he wanted to see me, I literally ran to the hospital and I find him watching something on his computer laughing his ass off, I walked in his room and he shouts at me, Hey! Come here, I’m watching Ae Ra’s videos, you like her?!” Kyung Soo smiled at the memory. He remembered how much he cried when he saw his friend smile again at some sketch she was doing on a TV Show “I knew who you where, but never listened to your music, so he showed me some of your videos and one of those videos was the live performance of this song and he said, This song saved me, what she says here woke me up from my nightmare, and we listened to the song, and I immediately understood why it meant so much to him” “I can’t believe my rants about feeling misunderstood and alone could help your friend who was going through something so much worse” She said looking at her hands grabbing his, a light blush on her cheeks “Remember when I told you not to look down on the importance of your existence, because you are definitely helping some people?” “Of course I do, I have been thinking about it since then” Ae Ra scratched her neck nervously “Well, this is what I meant with that, I know how important your existence is because I saw it, first hand” Ae Ra stood up and Kyung Soo felt his hands tingling. He tight them in a fist and then relaxed so they could be back to normal. She stayed up, giving him her back, her hands resting on her hips. The wind moved her hair looking like a superhero from the back “I know I don’t have that much importance in this world, you pick up a stone and 100 like me come up from under it, I know that, I’m not unique and I’m not irreplaceable, but this is my job, this is my passion, and there are a lot of people out there whose life’s I had improve with my work, they need me, they need me now and in the future, and I’m going to be there because I’m going to keep doing this, I’m going to keep giving support to your friend, and every single one of my fans, and a couple of psychos are not going to stop me from doing so, we need to go back to Seoul” Kyung Soo went back to bodyguard mode and couldn’t avoid sound a bit apprehensive when asking her if she was sure “Yes, I’m better, I need to start treatment, and I need to help more in the investigation, and I need to go back to work, I need to write and compose, let’s go back to Seoul” She was giving a statement, but it sounded like a question to him. He knew it was safe to come back. He had spoken with Mister Min and in his words, things have been calm over there “If that’s what you want, let’s start to prepare, I’m going to call Mister Min” She turned to him, relaxing her stand, and came back to her seat “Thank you for being here, I know it is a bother…” He was quick to interrupt her “Is not, your agency asked us to be here, is our obligation” Kyung Soo regretted saying those words immediately. He was trying to make her feel less guilty, but those were clearly not the right words. She looked disappointed at his words, and it stung his chest, so he corrects himself “Is an honor to be here working for you, and I’m having a great time, we are having a great time, Chanyeol likes working with you too” She laughed, and Kyung Soo released a long sight, he needed to be careful with his words “Thank you” She whispered, putting back her earphone, giving one to him. The music resumed from the beginning, and they stayed in silence looking at the landscape.

+++++

After dropping Minseok and Baekhyun at their place, Chanyeol drove them to Ae Ra’s house. She was looking forward to being back at her cave. She had a lot of drafts for new songs. When they stopped at Baekhyun’s house, Kyung Soo moved to the back seat next to her. He looked serious as always, in work mood, so she didn’t suspect anything. Chanyeol started driving and Kyung Soo turned to her. A cold shiver ran down her back, not a good one “Miss Ji, I spoke with Mister Min” “He had bad news, didn’t he?” He only nodded once “They keep sending threatening letters to the agency, every time from different addresses, the police look into it and they are all fake addresses, no fingerprints either” “What do the letters say?” “The same as always” She looked away and closed her eyes, trying to control the wave of fear and anguish that took over. This wasn’t over. They were still out there, they never stopped stalking her. Months have passed since the first letter, two attacks happened in between, and they were still free. They hadn’t given up. They will never give up until their sick fantasy of seeing her dead could come true. She was terrified now. She wanted to leave Seoul again. She needed the safety of anonymity. Miss Ji? She heard a voice, so distant it was almost imperceptible. Miss Ji? This time it sounded closer, louder. She wanted to open her eyes, but she couldn’t. Then she felt something tight around her hand. A warm, soft hand holding hers “Miss Ji?” This time the voice was loud and clear. And it was familiar and reassuring. She opened her eyes and found Kyung Soo in front of her. His eyes round and dark, eyebrows furrowed in worry. He had one hand on her neck, checking her pulse “Are you ok?” He asked, examining her face “Yes, yes, I’m ok, I’m sorry” “I think you passed out” “No! No, I didn’t I’m ok” Kyung Soo came back to his position, but his right hand remained holding hers “Miss Ji, we can go to a hotel, or back to the countryside if you wish” Chanyeol offered from the front seat, his face also covered in worry “No, I’m ok, for real” “Miss Ji, I told you once I need you to speak up, to ask for help, you are not ok, at least recognize that so we can make it better” Chanyeol had stopped in a red light and turned around to look at Kyung Soo “Hey, don’t…how?...you are right but don’t talk to her like that, she doesn’t need a nagging mom right now” “No, is ok Mister Park, he is right” She clenched Kyung Soo’s hand and closed her eyes agaShe had to ask for help, but she didn’t know what she needed. What help she needed. She was afraid. But going to her house was the safest idea. A hotel carried bad memories for her. They had already broken into one of them to leave a threatening message. Going back to the house in the hill sounded nice, but she wasn’t going to let them drive five hours back to that place again. Her house was safe. Kyung Soo made sure of it. No one ever sends letters there. And she wanted to sleep in her bed, take a bath, and start working on the dozens of songs she composed on her vacation “Mister Park, let’s go to my house, I think is the best place where we can be” “Understood” Ae Ra looked at Kyung Soo, she wanted to know if her decision was the right one. He held her stare and gave her a single nod, clenching her hand and releasing it. She didn’t like the weird feeling in her stomach when the warmth of his hand wasn’t there anymore. His hand rested about 5 centimeters away from hers, and she was dying to reach at grab it. To feel that reassurance again. But that was inappropriate. Very much so.

Before she could get inside her house Chanyeol went in and leave her with Kyung Soo in the car. It took him some good 20 minutes to be done “Sorry, I checked the garden too and the studio downstairs, it’s all clear, let’s get you inside”.

Chanyeol took her suitcases upstairs meanwhile she ordered some food so they could have dinner. Kyung Soo walked around the house, double-checking apparently.

After dinner, she went upstairs to take a shower and go to bed. She was collecting her dirty clothes when Kyung Soo knocked her doorframe letting her know that he was there “Chanyeol just left since he drove all the way here, I told him that I will take this shift, you need anything?” “No, I’m ok, I’m going to leave this on the laundry room and then I will sleep, you should do the same, you know you can use all the things available here” He bowed at her, a soft smile on his lips “I’ll do that then, remember whatever you need I will be in my room, ok?” “Yes mom” She joked, and Kyung Soo answered with one of those childlike bright smiles that she got to see so sporadically. He turned around to leave, but she stopped him, calling his name “I just…I know you say I don’t have too, but I just wanted to thank you for everything, for protecting me, from them and from myself, for being honest with me and for saying the things and need to hear, so…thank you Mister Do” He didn’t turn around. She could only look at the back of his head. He was calm, she could hardly see the movement of his shoulders with his breathing. His voice sounded serious and deep when he finally spoke “Miss Ji, I will stay next to you until this all goes away, doing what I have been doing until now or whatever you need from me, not only because it’s my job, but also because I owe you this much, I will bring back calm to your life, as you did with mine” He hesitated before taking a step ahead and walk to his room. He didn’t give her the opportunity to answer him. Although she didn’t know what to answer. She was completely lost of words. He breath stuck in her chest. The back of her neck burning. She tried to occupy herself on her unpacking, sing something to keep her mind there and not stuck at that moment some minutes ago. But it was so hard. By now it was so hard to look at Kyung Soo as just her bodyguard. How not to? He was always focused on her well-being and safety, he never hesitates when it came to attacking to protect her, he would literally shield her with his whole body. And he was always there, opening doors for her, quiet and stoic. Always in her space, leaning down to whisper something at her, holding her for comfort, talking to her so she could organize her mind, open up and talk. And also, he was cute as hell, attractive in such a classic way. Ugh. What a cliché. There were movies about that. The star and the bodyguard.

The next morning, she woke up after barely sleep the night before. Although it was good insomnia because it wasn't caused by fear. It was just giddiness and nervousness. A funny feel on her tummy at the thought of Mister Do. She skipped breakfast and went down to the basement into her studio. She locked herself there and wrote two full songs about Kyung Soo.

-----

Note: Is it normal that you get emotional with your own writing?. As I was writing the conversation they had in the living.... it touched me.

[donnerpartyofone]

21 Questions

Tagged by @getoutofmyhouse who had oddly similar answers to mine

Nickname: only the one I use here, that I gave myself--Claire Donner, which has to do with my famous love of cannibalism. Claire is my real first name, though.

Zodiac: I am so very cuspy. I was born at about a quarter to midnight on April 20, so I tend to relate to, and feel insulted by, the suppositions about Aries and Taurus equally. I’m one of those jerks who will tell you astrology is a bunch of hoo ha...and then drone on with my Many Esoteric Ideas about it, so I’ll just stop myself right here.

Height: 5’ nuthin is what I prefer to say...because saying I’m 5 and 3/4′ sounds a little like saying I’m 10 and a half years old.

Amount of sleep: It’s all fucked up. Until I got into my 30s I could, and would prefer to, sleep endlessly. Now I go to bed around 10 (depression), get up around 5 or 6 (being old), and for extra fun, I’ve developed this insomnia that often keeps me up from about 2am-5am. I try make the most of it by getting up, getting high, watching a movie or two, writing...basically just having a secret private day by myself. I’d really rather go back to just sleeping constantly though.

Last movie I saw: I saw GRETA in theaters tonight, which was ok. I guess I thought any Neil Jordan film would be headier than this, but watching Isabel Huppert just running around acting like an absolute maniac is a rare treat! My last video experience was RAW, which I put on to bother my husband right when we got home from the theater. (I think he liked it more than I originally did, to my surprise)

Last thing I googled: The correct spelling of Sylvia Likens’ last name. I’m obsessed with this type of crime where a group of people (usually a family and/or some of their friends and neighbors) fall into some kind of shared hysteria where they protractedly torture to death an acquaintance for no particular reason. Some times there’s an element of mystery as to why the victim didn’t leave while they were still able to, which suggests to me that the murdered person was just as much a victim of the groupthink as the perpetrators. Other example victims include Suzanne Capper, Vera Jo Reigle, and I think to some degree Sophie Lionnet, James Bulger, and Junko Furuta. (Also a crime they briefly discuss in the book Lords of Chaos, where several people murder a friend in their trailer, but I can’t remember it specifically enough to look up the names--the other last thing i tried to google) I keep thinking there should be a psychiatric and/or legal term for this kind of crime, but I’ve never heard one, so let me know if you got one!

Favorite musician: I have trouble with questions that involve ranking anything, so I’ll just say that right now I’m listening to a lot of old White Zombie. I didn’t know anything about their origins as an East Village noise band, and I’m fascinated by the stories about how apocalyptically miserable it was to be in that group. I’m increasingly obsessed with people who work their asses off doing something they barely even enjoy, for what must be borderline spiritual reasons.

Song stuck in my head: Nothing right this second, for which I am very grateful. There’s something awful in my brain that causes me to wake up with some maddening, babyish tune stuck in my head more often than not. It is most frequently the Ten Little Indians nursery rhyme. This is literally killing me.

Other blogs: @anhed-nia, which started as a dumping ground for long posts about mental illness, and turned into almost only movie writing. at some point there was just so much movie shit that i started to feel awkward about posting anything personal there again. i also got @getoffyrass which is a group blog, and a repository for images that make great drawing references. everyone is encouraged to post their drawings, too, although it is seldom used. i still like having it around, for when i have time to draw. my “real” drawing blog is @neveratendermoment but i don’t draw often enough anymore...

Do I get asks: i used to get tons! i really enjoy them, even the trolls to some degree. i must have seemed like more of a regular tumblr geek girl back in the day. also tumblr has just changed a lot since then. my blog was definitely a casualty of Best Stuff First, i think my follower count stopped dead forever right when that happened, and now that practically every single fucking thing on this entire site is either fandom shit or *discourse*, i really have nothing to offer tumblr anymore, anyway.

Blogs following: 1,057. 

Lucky numbers: 2! Also 5.

What I’m wearing: black wool long john pants from Chrome, and a white v neck teeshirt with the words BLACK MAYONNAISE on it in black Rocky Horror font. i live near the notoriously toxic Gowanus Canal, and “black mayonnaise” is the actual term used to describe what’s on the bottom of it, by the scientists who are trying to figure out what to do with it.

Dream trip: i am really excited by travel, it’s hard to pick. i’m hopefully making a dream trip soon though: my father’s mysterious finno-swedish family is from the åland islands, and my husband and i will be planning part of our honeymoon there, whenever that happens.

Dream Job: i think about this a lot, because the older i get, the more i object to the entire concept of having to work to live. i’m into the whole universal basic income thing. i’m at this point where i can barely stand to think about capitalism in any way--like i think about how the need for money is so mortally serious that there’s a lot of physical stuff in the world that only exists because someone was scared of starving, tons of useless products and packaging and factory byproducts and all kinds of fucking straight up garbage that was only invented due to the lethality of poorness. i would rather be left totally alone forever if possible. however, if i HAD to do something and i COULD do anything, it would probably be film criticism. this fantasy takes place in a world where people care so much about what i have to say that i can make a career, not only out of movie writing, but out of only writing about the specific movies i want to write about, referring to nothing other than my personal reactions.

Favorite food: i wish the answer weren’t just “cheese”, but it probably is. also mushrooms. anything cinnamon. i’m a pretty adventurous eater though. the most important thing for me is a variety of flavors and textures.

Languages: english. i took several years of italian in junior high-high school, and did nothing with it. i taught myself to read french pretty fluently, but i would fold right up if someone tried to speak to me. i learned a bunch of swedish on duolingo, shoulda kept it up. i’ll get back to it! i really regret never learning spanish though, so i’m easily torn on what to do with my time.

Play any instruments: clarinet in junior high/high school, also alto sax which i did not enjoy at all, a little guitar. i bought a used electric bass last year that i have really been enjoying, but i feel a lot of guilt around not playing enough. so much of it is just strength training. that’s probably what i like about it, though. also i got a lot of electronic music software and midi controllers and stuff...and then i realized that it could take me months to sort through the thousands of samples i have to program this stuff, and i only got so far into it before i started to get discouraged. i need to get back to it, it’s ridiculous to let that stuff lie around. this is a rare example of me wishing i knew someone local to play with, who could speed me along on how everything works.

Favorite songs: another one of these impossible questions! anybody who is even reading this can probably guess the answers from the handful of music posts i reblog over and over and over. the other night i got all hyperactive and forced my husband to drop everything and listen to “buffalo stance” by nene cherry, which i never ever get sick of. real top contenders for favorite song might be “Stand By the Jamms” by the klf, and this recording, which has gotten me through many difficult hours:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8k1HsF3EvY

https://www.forcedexposure.com/Catalog/sunray-sonic-boom-music-for-the-dreamachine-cd/STRAWB.003CD.html

Random fact: i’m sure i’m missing out on something really funny and cool, but for now it’s just the well-known fact that i read palms.

Describe yourself as aesthetic thing: man, how do i answer this without being totally pretentious? maybe nobody can! i’m coming up with something really hard to describe but it will be worth it. the other day i watched this insane, completely unnecessary movie about lorca and salvador dali (played by robert pattinson) as gay lovers. there’s a scene in it where lorca does that “pick a hand” thing to dali, and dali picks an empty hand. of course, they’re both poor students who couldn’t be buying any gifts, so they do this obnoxious pantomime where dali pretends lorca actually gave him something--but then it turns out that lorca really DOES have something. he opens his other hand and gives dali...SOMETHING. i don’t know what! they make such a big deal out of it, but what the hell? you see it for a second in this closeup, but it’s shot from like, behind and slightly underneath, and it is just unrecognizable. it’s sort of an orange blob? it’s probably meant to be a sculpture. but, i love the idea of doing the “pick a hand” thing to somebody, and the other person is just like...hey wait a minute, what the fuck even IS this?? 

it reminded me of one of the most amazing things anyone ever did at my school, bard college. this genius art student who I WISH I COULD NAME TO CREDIT HER did her senior project as this like...made up product. i saw them at the senior show, hanging off a spinner rack, like you’d see next to the register in the drug store. they were called Toilet Buddies. they were these plastic, brightly colored objects that looked like toys, but they didn’t have a familiar earthly shape, and because of the title, it was IMPOSSIBLE to imagine what to do with them. so, she gets the lipstick cam from the film department, and shoots this video of herself sneaking some Toilet Buddies into Walmart. then she takes them to the register and BUYS THEM--the baffled cashier looks for them for a while, and eventually just rings them up as a general grocery or something. then in part 2, the artist TAKES THEM BACK TO THE STORE WITH THE RECEIPT AND GETS A REFUND.

so anyway, i see myself as like a fake product--something that looks just familiar enough to exit, and that appears to have a designated purpose, but it’s just kind of cheap and foreign and it becomes nightmarish to try to imagine what to do with it. 

I don’t know if anyone i know will want to do this, but i tag @negativepleasure @moviesludge @former-contender @dimestoreman @thefuzzydave @darkarfs @theoddsideofme @blueruins ...um, i don’t really know who would enjoy this. the ultimate would be @garbagenacht

[wackjams]

the beginning.

yoongi x (f)reader

genre: fluff warnings: just a few (like three) curse words, very minor sex mention word count: 4.8k

You’d been best friends with Ara ever since you started University, which was about two years ago now. You two were roommates at the dorms and now had your own shared apartment off campus together.

The two of you clicked instantly. You were complete opposites yet had so much in common at the same time. Despite her being a social butterfly and you being more of the quiet introvert type, you two shared the same interest in films and favorite foods, little things like that. 

You and Ara had done almost everything together ever since meeting. Walking to class, coming home, eating dinner together, going clubbing (whenever she was able to convince you to go), even studying for Uni together or just running errands.

So when she had gotten a boyfriend and started doing everything with him instead, you felt neglected. Alone, almost. She wasn't just your closest friend but also one of your only friends. Everyone else was just acquaintances.  

But you dealt with it. He was important to her and she was happy. That is what you cared most about.

With a heavy sigh, you set your own takeout on the counter before sitting to eat dinner by yourself, again. Okay maybe you were a bit of a crybaby about your friend being with her boyfriend all of the time but what about you? Her best friend? Didn't she miss takeout and movie nights with you? 

You could only hope she did. 

So you just ate and watched your current show-interest on Netflix on your phone. It wasn't until a half-hour later when the door opened that you finally looked away from the show. You finished sipping your water just as Ara came home with her boyfriend, Hoseok, or better known as Hobi to most people.

"Hey!" Ara smiled at the sight of you. She walked over after kicking off her shoes and took your fork from you, shamelessly taking a bite of your food and hummed in pleasure at the savory taste. 

"Hey," You whined up at her. "You can't just miss our Friday night routine then come home and just steal my food, Ara."

She frowned down at you now. "I'm so sorry, y/n. I promise I didn't do it on purpose."

"She didn't." Hoseok came and joined the two of you now. He gave you an apologetic look now as he spoke. "I took Ara to meet my friends finally and we just got really distracted. Once she realized the time, she made me bring her home ASAP."

"Oh,"

"I wanted to be here too, y/n. I'm sorry."

"It's okay."

You gave your best friend a smile to reassure her. Patting her arm, you stood up, slipping your phone into the back pocket of your jeans, and began putting your leftovers away. 

"Did you have fun? What're his friends like?" You asked her.

"Oh. My. God." Ara let out the most dramatic sigh you've ever heard. Gigging at her, you glanced to Hoseok who was just smiling now as he watched his girlfriend with nothing but sweet admiration in his eyes. "They're amazing. They are all so funny and loud and just... energetic. I love them."

"Sounds loud. Sounds... crowded."

"Yes! It is. There are six of them, seven including Hobi. And," Two fake coughs and a very cheeky wink. "They are hot."

"Hello, boyfriend right here???" Hoseok held his hands in the air with a playful, yet serious, pout over his face.

"I'm sorry! She just hasn't been with anyone in... ages. Holy shit, have you ever? Like, have you ever had sex or even had a boyfriend?" Ara looked from her boyfriend back to you with her eyes widened and her lips parted in shock at the sudden realization that she's never seen you with a man before.

"Ara! Leave her alone," Hoseok chuckled. 

He noticed your horrified expression and knew he had to cut in, but you snapped back. "Of course I have! Geeze, I may not be a people person but I have had.. men, in my life."

Hoseok and Ara both laughed at how disgusted you sounded with your response. Their laughter even brought a smile to your face. They were both such cheerful, happy, people that you always found yourself smiling around them. Whether they were together or you were around them separately, they always made you laugh. 

"Hey, you should come to hang out with us tomorrow. We're meeting up at our house for a scary movie and dinner." Hoseok gave you such a warm grin that you almost agreed instantly but something he said made you furrow your eyebrows instead. 

"House? Your house? All seven of you live in one big house?"

"It's such a nice house!" Ara jumped in her seat in excitement at the fact. 

You huffed. "I don't know." Ara and Hoseok both rolled their eyes at you now. You gasped at the two of them, crossing your arms across your chest like a child and looked down to your socks. "Fine. Just stop using those judgemental eyes on me."

"Yes!" They both jumped up, giving each other a high five. 

They are so cringey, yet so cute. 

- - - - - - - - -

The next day you did your normal routine. Wake up, shower and brush your teeth, go to your three morning classes, eat lunch, go home and do some work which all ended around 4 PM which was perfect because, at that time, Ara had let you know it was time to head over to Hoseok's house. 

You met her downstairs in her car then she drove you two there. It was about fifteen minutes away. 

Ara had spent the whole time telling you their names. Jin, Namjoon, Yoongi, Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook. There were too many for you to remember straight away but you did your best. 

Who needed six friends exactly? That was something you kept asking yourself.

The house you two came up to was quite big, yet not as ginormous or fancy as you had imagined. For some reason, you imagined a big mansion or something but it looked like normal, big, and friendly. One a married couple would live at with their five kids yet it was seven grown men instead. 

You almost giggled at the thought. 

Ara led you from the driveway up to the front door of the home, ringing the doorbell then glancing back to you with a giddy smile over her pink lips. 

You adored how happy your best friend was now with Hoseok in her life. And now, you realize she didn't forget about you like you had been thinking for the past few months because she was too excited to be out, to be here, with you. You almost felt guilty for thinking that before. 

"Ding dong!" The door flew open, revealing a tall boy with shaggy hair hanging over his forehead and the biggest bunny smile on his face. 

"Ahh, Jungkook!" Ara leaned in and hugged the boy.

"You just saw me last night. Don't act too surprised to see me." He teased her playfully. 

Ara smacked his arm as they pulled away from the hug then turned to face you. "Jungkook, this is my best friend, y/n. Hoseok invited her over with us."

"Wow," Jungkook looked between the two of you with furrowed eyebrows. "Your boyfriend had to invite you over instead of you doing do yourself? What a terrible friend."

"My thoughts exactly." You shook your head, agreeing with the boy. 

He smiled at you now then shook your hand as he introduced himself to you properly. Once that was done he let the two of you inside.

It was quiet, to your surprise, and also very neat and everything was organized. Aimlessly, you looked around the home with your hands folded together in front of you. You were a little nervous about being here, meeting all these new people, but you promised yourself you'd try to have fun for your own sake. 

Also, that quietness you had been enjoying a minute ago, it had disappeared before you could even process what was exactly happening as another one of the boys came flying down the stairs with another chasing after him. 

"Taehyung! Give me my phone back!"

"Never!" 

They ran straight past you and into another room, yelling at one another and stomping so hard it made the floor vibrate. 

Ara and Jungkook laughed at the two as you stood there a little in shock at how fast they just ran down those stairs without tumbling and getting hurt.

"That was Jimin and Taehyung. The two biggest children of the house even though I'm the youngest." Jungkook explained to you.

"Nonsense." A new voice had filled the room now. You looked up to the taller man, smiling at him as he did down at you. "Jungkook is the biggest child, living up to being the youngest. Don't let him fool you."

"Yelling ding dong while answering the door didn't strike me as "mature"," You teased the boy with a soft laugh. 

Jungkook rolled his eyes at the two of you before walking off with a laugh of his own. One that sounded almost embarrassed.

"I'm Namjoon. You're y/n right?"

"That I am." You reached out and met his hand he extended towards you, giving him a handshake. 

"Hobi told us you'd be joining. Come on, everyone is out back getting ready for the barbeque."

You and Ara smiled at one another before linking arms and following Namjoon through the house and outside through the sliding kitchen doors. 

Some music was playing outside as one of the boys stood near the grill and flipped something over, another sat at the picnic table with his face buried into his phone, Jungkook sat beside him on his own mobile device, and Hoseok was just setting some plates down as you walked out. 

Hoseok cheered when he saw his girlfriend. Everyone, including you, jumped at his reaction to Ara, who so quickly let go of your arm and ran to her boyfriend. 

You chuckled softly at the two of them acting like he didn't just leave your apartment this morning after spending the night. You rolled your eyes when they began kissing, as well as everyone else. 

Lazily, and a little lost on what to do exactly, you walked over to the picnic table and sat across from Jungkook who smiled when you joined him and the other friend.

"Ah, y/n, this is Yoongi. He's a bit of a grumpy pants so don't mind him if he's quiet." 

"Oh, no worries."

Yoongi glared over at his younger friend before looking across at you, giving you a warming smile despite what Jungkook had just said.

"Ignore him. He's a bit of an idiot."

"Hey!"

"Yes," Yoongi ignored Jungkook's whining. "I'm Yoongi. Hoseok told us all about you."

"Really?" You were surprised. 

Yoongi shrugged before putting his phone down on the table. "Kinda sorta. It's still nice to meet you, though."

"Likewise."

You two smiled at each other. Jungkook watched you two despite neither one of you noticing. Smiling, he suddenly got up and ran off to find Jimin.

Over the next hour and a half, you had finally met everyone. Jin was the one cooking and Jimin and Taehyung had finally stopped roughhousing long enough to introduce themselves as well. 

Despite feeling awkward at first, you warmed up to the big group of friends and felt yourself a little more relaxed over time. Ara was so excited that you were out of the house and meeting new people but she was also too distracted the whole time by Hoseok to realize you wandered off after finishing your dinner.

You had to pee, which you did find the bathroom and did so, but then you got distracted by the things in the house. Now you weren't necessarily creeping around at anything but you did find an interest at all of the photos on the walls and how many doors were along the walls in the hallways showing just how much space this house really had.

You brushed your fingertips along the painted walls, humming softly to yourself as your eyes aimlessly looked around your surroundings. You could still hear everyone chatting downstairs as you kept upstairs. 

As interesting as these guys were, they were loud. Very loud. And hyper; so full of energy. Ara did mention that last night but you had no idea it was this crazy over here. 

"Get lost?"

You jumped up with a soft gasp of surprise. Turning around quickly from the group photo on the wall, you found Yoongi standing behind you, laughing softly from scaring you. 

"Sorry. Ara was looking for you." He apologized as he walked over to stand beside you now.

"Really? She finally pulled herself away from Hoseok for a minute to realize I left to wonder where I am?" You teased. 

Yoongi cringed at the thought of the two, shaking his head as he slipped his hands into his pockets. "They really are so mushy. Don't get me wrong, I love seeing Hobi so happy but gosh they're kind of annoying. And this is only day two of me being around them together. How have you managed to deal with them these past few months?"

"Barely." Yoongi laughed at your response. You smiled at him and his cute little gummy smile, glancing to the photo again with a sigh. "But I am glad she's happy, too."

Yoongi caught you looking to the photo a few times and decided to speak out about it. "That's all of us a couple years ago. Around the time we first met."

You smiled at him and then at the photo. Everyone looked much younger and so happy, too. "How'd you guys find each other? There are some age gaps, no?"

"Oh definitely. Jin is the oldest, then myself followed by Hobi and Namjoon. Then Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook as the youngest. It isn't weird at all though. We all act the same, almost, and have so much in common. It started with me meeting Namjoon, who knew Jungkook already who was like a younger brother to him." You nodded at him as you listened, letting him know that you were listening. "And then we met Jin and Taehyung, and Hobi then Jimin. Just one of us knowing the other and becoming the big group of seven brothers."

"Brothers," You giggled softly, nudging his elbow with yours. "That's sweet. It's nice having people in your life."

Yoongi nodded in agreement. He really did love his brother's friends. 

Before he could respond Ara yelled up the stairs for you. You sighed before walking down with Yoongi to see what she wanted. 

That all happened about a month ago now. You met the boys and instantly became so close to all of them. Hobi and Ara were still dating and being as cute and sappy together as always. Jungkook and you were closest out of the group, besides the little relationship you've built with Yoongi.

Jungkook might've had a lot in common with you but he was more like Ara in a sense, where Yoongi was more like you in behavior and mindset. He wasn't a big fan of people or large groups either, and he also enjoyed staying at home more than going out. That was your biggest similarity. 

You often found yourself at their house almost every other day, with or without Ara depending on how your days went. 

You never really imagined yourself being friends with such a large group but you enjoyed their company more than you genuinely thought you could've when first meeting them all those weeks ago.

"Y/n," Taehyung and Jin walked into the living room of your apartment completely unannounced or even invited over. You looked up to them from your book, furrowing your eyebrows. "We need you to come over."

"A call would've worked..?" You said, still really confused yet happy to see them at the same time. 

They both sat on either side of you on the sofa. You closed your book and set it down on your coffee table. "No, really, come over. We're all going out tonight but grumpy Yoongi doesn't wanna come and we already know you won't-"

"How fo you know that?" You asked, cutting off Tae. Both him and Jin laughed at you. They knew you too well already. You sighed. "Okay, you're right."

"Exactly," Jin patted your thigh now. "Just go over and sit with him so neither of you are alone while we all get drunk and party."

"I have an exam in the morning-"

"One of us will give you a ride if you sleep over! Stop hiding in your cave, y/n."

You grumbled under your breath at the two of them. Knowing them, you knew too well they wouldn't give up so you just gave in. You grabbed a few things from your room after before leaving the comfort of your own apartment and let them drive to you the house. 

Everyone, including Ara, greeting you upon your arrival before shuffling into their cars and leaving to go to the club. Before they pulled out from the driveway, Jungkook stuck his head out the window since you stood close to the car. 

"Hey, y/n, make a move on Yoongi already."

"What?!"

Jungkook rolled his big eyes at you. "All you two do is flirt and blush at each other. You're finally alone so make a move already will you?"

Before you could even say anything, they pulled out of the driveway and headed off together.

You waved at the group of friends as they drove off, honking the horn at you as they passed by the house. With a tired sigh now, you walked into the quiet home. 

Jungkook's words were replaying over and over in the back of your mind. You really couldn't help but to wonder and think about what he said. 

Yoongi didn't flirt with you, and you not with him... right? You never noticed, at least.

Kicking off your shoes, you walked inside to find Yoongi. He wasn't in the living room or the kitchen, nor was he in the gaming room or outback. You furrowed your eyebrows now when you couldn't find him anywhere. So you headed upstairs to his room, where you knocked on the door. 

There was some shuffling behind the door before it flew open, a very surprised Yoongi stood there. His expression relaxed when he saw it was you and he held his hand over his chest, right over his heart. 

"Jesus, y/n. I thought all of you went to the club tonight. You scared me."

"Sorry," You giggled at him. "Me? Go to a club? Come on now."

"Good point. Please, come in."

He smiled so warmly at you as he stepped aside and let you into his room. You headed in with a smile of your own. You always enjoyed being around Yoongi. He was quiet but he made you laugh a lot and he was so sweet to you all of the time.

So sweet in fact, Jimin argues with you often saying he isn't that way with anyone but you. You refuse to believe that, though. 

"What are you doing in here?" You asked at the sight of his computer being open to multiple tabs and different papers scattered around him. 

"Writing." He answered, sitting down in his chair in front of his computer. You sat on his bed which was near his desk.

"Writing? Do you write fanfictions online or something?" You were only teasing but he glared at you a little before giving into a smile.

"No, just some music. It's a little hobby I have. Whenever I'm free I do it."

"That's so cool. Hey, when you become famous don't forget me okay?"

Yoongi gave you his famous gummy smile. waving you off as he shook his head. "I could never forget you. But, I'll be rich so my personality will change. Name brand everything, twelve cars, super big mansion. Ya know."

"Riiiiiight." You rolled your eyes at him. Yoongi laughed before flicking a pencil at you. You caught it and tossed it back, laughing back with him. 

Silence filled the room after that but it wasn't uncomfortable. Actually, it was very comfortable. You could always find yourself sitting silently with him and not feel awkward. 

You bit your bottom lip once you found yourself staring at the black-haired boy- watching as he slipped his headphones back on his head, leaving one of his ears uncovered in case you decided to talk to him again. He was messing with some things on screen as he bobbed his head to the beat of the music he was listening to, often glancing down to a paper in front of him.

He was beautiful, something you knew the moment you saw him but only recently started to admit to yourself. You'd be lying if you said you didn't have a little crush on him because you definitely did but no one knew, not even Ara. 

Jungkook and Jimin sure did think you two liked one another though.

You didn't think he'd like you back so you just kept it to yourself and you definitely didn't tell any of the other boys.  

Thinking about it made you flustered. You sighed aloud and brushed your hair back behind your shoulders. "Yoongi, I have an exam in the morning. I shouldn't stay too long, I just wanted to say hey."

"Oh okay." He paused his music and slipped his headphones back off of his head to around his neck now. He turned to face you better and tilted his head slightly to the right when your eyes met. "I mean, you could always sleep over if you wanted."

"I have class in the morning or else I would." You admitted. "You live too far for me to walk. I'm too lazy for far walks."

Yoongi chuckled at you. "I'll drive you to class in the morning."

"I couldn't ask-"

"I would be happy to, y/n."

You stared over at him with a small frown. But you knew, just because it's Yoongi you're talking to, you wouldn't win this argument. So you gave in and agreed to stay.

The rest of the night you laid in Yoongi's bed with him with a little space between the two of you. You watched a few movies together, laughing at the comedy and jumping from the scary ones. You tried convincing him to watch a romantic film but he refused. That caused a little bickering between you but he bought you over with chocolate.

Damn your sweet tooth.

It wasn't until the next morning when you woke up from your alarm on your phone, buried in his chest, that you realized you never made it to the guest bedroom like planned and ended up sleeping here instead, wrapped in Yoongi's arms. 

You glanced down to his arms around your waist with your legs tangled together over the sheets. You lifted your head from his chest and looked up to him, humming cutely yet sleepily at the sight of his cute sleeping face. 

Smiling to yourself, you reached up and very gently brushed his hair back from his forehead. Yoongi didn't move and just continued to sleep so peacefully beside you. You didn't even want to wake him from his slumber but knew you had to get to class and he did promise to take you.

Well, he insisted to.

"Yoongi..." You shook his shoulder. At this point, you wiggled a bit to get out of his grip but it was too tight and only grew tighter when he felt you moving too much. You huffed at this, "Yoongi wake up."

You patted his chest now after a moment of him not even budging to wake. This time he furrowed his eyebrows and turned his head to the side. 

"Stop," He grumbled.

"Um, no. You have to take me to class. Plus you're squeezing me and I have to pee. And I need to get out of here before everyone finds me and gets the wrong idea." You whined out at him now.

If your friends saw you two cuddling in his bed, they really would get the idea something was going on between you two. Not that you didn't want that to be the case, but what if Yoongi didn't?

"And... who said that'd be a bad thing, y/n?" He asked you now with that raspy morning voice. You felt the butterflies in your stomach from his words. 

Maybe you thought wrong.

"Yoongi that's not funny." Your voice was a whisper now.

He gave you a sleepy smirk before letting his grip around your waist loosen and untangling your legs. 

You jumped up before he could say anything else and rushed from his bedroom into the bathroom. 

There you did your business before brushing your teeth and brushing your hair too before changing into the spare clothes you packed in case of sleeping over. 

It took you about fifteen minutes to get ready before leaving the bathroom and going back to Yoongi's room. He wasn't there anymore though, so you headed downstairs yourself. 

Everyone must've been asleep still because there was no one else downstairs and it was quiet in the house. Well, it was also only 9:30 and who knows when they got home from the club last night. 

Yoongi had kept you up until around three AM and they hadn't returned yet so again, who knows.

You smiled when you came across Yoongi standing near the front door waiting for you. He looked so tired still and you almost felt bad for waking him, but he was the one who said he'd drive you if you stayed. 

So the two of you climbed into one of the three cars in the driveway and he headed off towards your University. 

The car ride was quiet besides the radio playing softly and a few yawns coming from sleepy Yoongi.

You glanced at him ever so often, watching him pay attention to the road as he drove you there carefully. His hair was a tangled mess and he was only in a pair of gray sweatpants and a white shirt, but he still looked so good. 

How can he do that?

Upon arriving at your University, he pulled into a parking space with yet another yawn then turned to face you. 

"I'll see you later?" He asked you. 

"You want to?"

"Of course," He chuckled, showing you that damn cute smile again. "I meant what I said you know."

"About what?"

He rolled his eyes at your confusion. It was cute, but he was also too tired to deal with complications. So he skipped straight to the point. "About it not being a bad thing if they saw us and thought something was going on. I wouldn't mind, and I also wouldn't mind if something did start between us."

"Oh," You felt a hot blush spread across your cheeks and down your neck. "I guess I wouldn't mind either, honestly." 

He smiled at your cute confession. He reached over for your hand, bringing it up to his lips and kissing over your knuckles. "I'll be here when you're done with your exam. Just text me. We'll get something to eat and, I don't know, go do something together."

"Are you asking me out on a date Min Yoongi?"

"I guess I am."

You smiled so wide at him now. You didn't even hesitate to nod in agreement, giving his hand a little squeeze. "Okay. I'll see you in a few hours then."

You leaned over to kiss his cheek, climbing out of the car to take the exam you now knew you wouldn't be able to focus on as all you could think about was this date with Yoongi.

[letterboxd]

McCarthy.

“Give me a real character like Lee who’s complicated and irritating and smart.” Melissa McCarthy talks about her Oscar-nominated performance in the acclaimed true story Can You Ever Forgive Me?

In the media discussion building up to this year’s Academy Awards, the talking points have principally concerned decisions regarding the ceremony itself, leaving many of the nominated films somewhat overlooked in the conversation.

One triple-nominee very much worthy of discussion is Marielle Heller’s Can You Ever Forgive Me?, which received nominations for Best Adapted Screenplay (Nicole Holofcener & Jeff Whitty), Best Supporting Actor (the great Richard E. Grant) and Best Actress for Melissa McCarthy’s caustic and hilarious performance as real-life literary forger Lee Israel.

Based upon Israel’s memoir of the same title, Can You Ever Forgive Me? chronicles how the writer (of biographies of Estée Lauder and Tallulah Bankhead, among others) found herself out of favor and out of work in the ’90s New York literary world.

After discovering that letters by famous writers could be highly valuable to certain collectors, Israel took to forging correspondence by people like Dorothy Parker and Noël Coward, and selling the results via rare book stores.

In addition to profiting from the deception, the acerbic Israel also took considerable pride in her ability to capture her subjects’ trademark wit.

There aren’t many movies made about people like Lee Israel, and that’s what makes Can You Ever Forgive Me? so fascinating. The character fails all the obvious (and idiotic) “likability” standards that afflict many mainstream films: she’s an alcoholic misanthrope who lashes out at everyone around her. Yet she’s impossible to look away from, and we remain wholly invested in her throughout every bad decision.

Richard E. Grant co-stars in the film as Jack Hock, an acquaintance who becomes Lee’s friend, and eventually her collaborator, via their mutual affection for booze. More than one person has accurately observed that if you dim your eyes, Hock could easily be Withnail, thirty years later. His Oscar campaign has been one of the most gleeful joys of awards season, and a pleasing reward for an actor who was “told right from the get-go that I looked like a tombstone”.

Mostly taking place in a Manhattan of wood-lined taverns and fusty bookstores, and quietly celebrating some of the city’s longest lasting icons including Julius, the city’s oldest gay bar, Can You Ever Forgive Me? is a minor miracle of a film that represents a new level of achievement for McCarthy.

The Oscar nomination is not her first (she received a Best Supporting nod for Bridesmaids in 2012), but there’s a complexity to her performance here that makes it undeniably special.

Director Heller (The Diary of a Teenage Girl, and currently in production on the Tom Hanks biopic about Mr Rogers) joined McCarthy to discuss the film at a recent AFI event in Hollywood.

On what made Heller want to direct the film: Marielle Heller: I found Lee really refreshing. I feel like we have male [lead] characters who are assholes all the time and we find them to be the most interesting characters, and you never get to see women like that. And so there was something about her I just immediately went, ‘Yeah, we need more women like Lee’. Also, middle-aged women who kind of don’t fit into society’s norms. Childless, lesbian. She didn’t fit into the model of what we make movies about, and so I just thought there was something nice and radical to me about that. It shouldn’t be radical, but it felt really radical. There was something about the fact that her intellect and her work is so much more important than her appearance, that I loved. And that she’s genuinely the smartest person in every room, but no one gives her that credit.

Marielle Heller directs Melissa McCarthy on the set of ‘Can You Ever Forgive Me?’

On how McCarthy heard about the role: Melissa McCarthy: I had a very quick introduction to Lee. I heard about it first from my husband [Ben Falcone]. There was an earlier incarnation of the movie—movies fall apart all the time for a million different reasons—and my husband had a part in it, the part he ended up playing in this one [of a rare book dealer], and that’s how I read it. We read each other’s scripts and talked about it and after I read it I was like, ‘This is incredible, this is so good and why on earth don’t I know who Lee Israel is?’. I was disappointed with myself that I didn’t know about her.

On McCarthy’s response to the character as written: MM: I had a very strong reaction. I was at page twenty and I thought, ‘Oh I like her so much’. And then I had to stop and I went back through the first twenty pages, because I couldn’t figure out why. It was intangible. There’s no moment, there’s no speech. I started to fall in love with her, and that to me was the most exciting thing. I find her intriguing, challenging. I loved that she didn’t need someone else to validate who she was. Even when she is difficult, which is often. I respected her.

It also just made me think about being so talented at something and being told at 52, ‘You know, we don’t need you to do that anymore. You’re now obsolete.’ So as someone gets better and better and more experienced, the average thing is ‘Now you’re obsolete’. I just found that whole way of thinking so insane, that I thought, what would any of us do if we were pushed to that point? So the more she kind of conned and grifted, I found myself rooting for her.

On how she got into Lee’s headspace: MM: I read everything she wrote. I also listened to stories from people who actually knew Lee, and then there is a bit of conjuring. You just wanna do right by the people. The costume and wardrobe department were very important because I had no interest in looking like myself. I think it’s really freeing to get to walk around in other people’s shoes and I think that allows you to be braver and more vulnerable. It’s a very fantastic part of what I do, I think you get to be steadier or more empowered because it’s happening through someone else. It takes the pressure off of me.

I have a real fascination in what drives us all. What our quirks are. I don’t know any perfect woman, I don’t know how to play pleasant or blonde. Give me a real character like Lee who’s complicated and irritating and smart and all these things that when I look at someone, it makes you kinda fall in love with them. All my friends are nuts. They always need a qualifier like, ‘They’re actually great, just get to know them’. That’s why we love people. You don’t love people because they’re pleasant, you love them because they’ll talk too much or say the wrong thing, but they’ll show up at 3 o’clock when you don’t feel well and help you. It’s so rare that you get to play a woman like that. Those are the women that I know. They’re complicated and challenging.

On Jack and Lee’s friendship: MM: They were both so lonely. And it’s such a universal thing. I don’t know a human that hasn’t felt incredibly lonely and undervalued. We are all so lonely. I think everyone can feel that tether to those characters, and it’s why even though they shouldn’t have been friends, they needed each other.

On Melissa and Richard’s friendship: MH: Those two loved each other from the day they met in a way that was like, every director’s dream, because they showed up and immediately got along. Richard would show up on days he wasn’t filming and take Melissa to lunch. It was amazing because they were truly becoming friends on this movie and when we got to the scene where they were essentially breaking up, they had to hug each other afterwards because it was so painful.

On working alongside Richard E. Grant: MM: He’s so completely present as a person, and that certainly translates into his beautiful acting because he is 1,000% there. If you go this way, he goes with you. There’s just an ease to it. And we do sometimes these incredibly difficult scenes that were just heartbreaking, and then when we finished, we’d both become very silly and throwaway, which is really important sometimes when you’re shooting something that’s difficult. And then we’d go right back to it. I had such an ease working with him. I think we work in a very similar way. I think we fully commit, right or wrong, and trusted that Marielle is at the helm of a ship and she did it with complete authority and a complete lightness at the same time.

Richard E. Grant and Melissa McCarthy in ‘Can You Ever Forgive Me?’

On the benefits of having a female director: MM: Hands down it was fantastic. And I’ve been very fortunate to work a lot of wonderful male directors [who] also have a quote-unquote ‘feminine side’, my husband, Paul Feig, Ted Melfi, they all have a capacity to listen and be collaborative. I think with Mari, what always sticks in my head, there was never a moment where you didn’t feel completely guided. And the crew, you could see it, really felt like they were all part of this, we knew exactly what Mari’s vision is. And working in this kind of time frame, you need that cohesiveness, and you need someone—I think it’s more likely to happen with a female director—you need someone to do the right thing for the movie, instead of proving that they’re right. And there’s a big difference there. And when you get someone like Mari doing that, the world just falls into place.

On approaching a dramatic role versus a comedic role: MM: There’s absolutely no difference to me. If it’s comedy or drama, it doesn’t change for me at all, I think if it’s a straight comedy, I still try to find, or I’m least very interested in, like, what’s tragic about that person. Like, if they’re so overly pleasant and happy, why? What pain are they hiding? So I do the same thing, if someone’s really aggressive, what’s behind that? So I change nothing. Maybe you’re supposed to, but I don’t.

‘Can You Ever Forgive Me?’ is currently available on all the major streaming services. Reporting by West Coast Editor Dominic Corry.

[mentalcurls]

3.  Una festa in cui nessuno ti vuole

Here we go, my thoughts on episode 3 of season 1! Finally the whole girl squad is together and out there having fun. The topics I’ve managed to ramble about about this time are double standards, fandom, Mom friend™ Giovanni Garau and the mysterious Francesca Mirabella, as well as the results of the Bechdel test for this episode  ✌🏻

“Eva, mi guardi?” was the precursor to “Martino, guardami Martino!”

Gio really doesn’t get it. He keeps saying he’s doing things for Eva, when actually he does them to appease her so she won’t bust his balls, so he’s doing them for himself

Cerami and Bea sound exactly like all couples of middle schoolers I knew when I was in middle school myself. The shoes thing especially. It’s hilarious.

I understand Gio’s frustration with Eva, I do, cause it’s hard being the only point of reference for a person when you have a much more diverse social life. I’ve been on both sides of their situations actually. When Gio says “Couldn’t you try to make some friends?” I know his intentions are good, he’s coming from a place of wanting happiness for this girl he’s in love with, despite being frustrated with her just then; but I also understand Eva a lot, the feeling of isolation, of not knowing what to do or who to turn to because everyone just seems too distant or too busy with their lives (and of course there’s some condescension there too, cause she’s a teenager, she’s got standards, especially since she was popular before fighting with Laura), and the frustration she must feel, because it’s not just Laura ostracizing her, she made scorched earth around Eva for several degrees of acquaintances; and I’m 100% sure that deep, deep down Eva is a bit angry that she had to bear most of the brunt while Gio came out of the situation unscathed

Eva’s disdain for her classmates who like manga and k-pop wounds me deep into my fangirl heart, not because I’m specifically a fan of those things myself, but because she’s using those example to say they’re loser nerds because they have that strong passion for those things, the same passion I am, as a matter of fact, pouring over Skam Italia and Eva’s own story right now. Plus she’s basically shitting on fandoms included among those mostly made up of teen girls and LGBTQ+ people, so there’s that. Are you a fangirl of anything, Eva? Do you know what it means to fell such a pull towards something, a book, a movie, a song? Have you ever felt it? Do you know how nice, how rewarding being a part of fandom is? How fun? My wish for Eva at the end of the season, for when she decides to focus more on herself, on understanding who she is, is actually to get in one of those fandoms she seems to dislike, cause it’s a wild ride, yes, but it’s also an opportunity to learn so much about other people, places, worlds, and ultimately about yourself.

“Eva, it’s nice to be around you. Maybe you forgot, but when someone is around you, it feels nice. Trust me.” And this I think is the first real taste of that Mom friend™ Gio we’ve come to know and love in season 2, that protective, supportive, loyal person who gives good advice and just knows how to lift your spirits. This could have 100% been a conversation he had with Marti in S2, if Marti had been feeling insecure after he pushed everyone away. More importantly, this could 100% be something Gio tells Nico at any point ever in which he’s feeling low. Can you imagine that? Oh my God. Especially with the joke about smelling afterwards. (Aaand I made it about S2 rather than about Eva. Ops.)

poor Eva, she tries so hard. Too hard, in fact. If instead of that whole three-messages-and-a-sticker explanation she’d just gone “*Hey” it would have made her cringe less at herself and it would probably have prompted more of a response from Ele. I understand the panic though.

those theatre kids look just like the twins from “The Shining”! The girls is even wearing light blue like them! And they walk in sync and call Eva’s name repeatedly and ask her to come act in a play with them! OMG, LudoBesse’s mind, honestly.

Ele is so bad at fake crying, really. And the fact that theatre guy, a person who’s supposed to know something about acting/pretending, falls for it kills me.

Evanora for the win, honestly, look how cute they are together. I mean, Ele definitely looks pretty smitten here, immediately noticing Eva from afar, making her smile and reassuring her in a roundabout way about her fumble on Facebook a few days before

poor Gio, the Anglo-Spanish War is kind of a bitch, though to be fair the only things about it history professors usually care about are who was ruling those countries and the Invincible Armada; the Thirty Years’ War is much more interesting (defenestration of Prague, anyone?)

how cute is Silvia??? BRB going to throw myself into a volcano

Gio and Marti doing the parent thing over Eva like Gio and Elia will do in S2 over Marti himself

then Martino catches Federica’s eye and we have the infamous spoon scene; Fede sort-of-pretends-to-fellate the spoon and Marti looks away, embarrassed and uneasy. I love how Skam (both the og and Italia) have taken the trope of the guy ogling the girl from afar (or not so afar) and her feeling uncomfortable under the attention, and have reversed the gender of who’s looking and who’s looked at.

What I don’t like is how it’s framed, in the shots and in the discussion between the characters, like it’s creepier than most of the stuff boys do to girls during the series (I’m thinking especially of guys at parties in general and of the Villa boys). The vehemence Martino uses to express his discomfort over Federica sexualizing him and making her interest evident is basically the same with which the girls react to finding the tally on the wall behind the boys’ bathrooms. This would kind of be fine, despite the fact that the two things are imo on different levels of disgusting, if it was discussed somehow that boys doing disturbing stuff are considered normal, just hormonal teensagers, but when girls do a fraction of the same thing they’re demonized, considered really weird and too horny. There’s no discussion of the double standard and that’s what bothers me.

Something else that would have been interesting to explore, maybe not with Marti, but later with possibly Chicco Rodi, since we see Fede talk to him at a party and even kiss him (if I remember correctly) is the follow-up from that trope: the guy usually goes up to the girl and makes a comment and she turns him away, but oftentimes after he insists a while she concedes and she ends up dancing/going out/going home with him. Which is a shitty thing that happens in a lot of media. It’s actually kind of what happens with Edoardo and Eleonora later. And it would have been super interesting to see Fede doing the ogling thing (which would have never been as rude, graphic and uncomfortable as guys can get, anyways), being turned down, then actually getting her way, and what kind of reactions she’d have from the guy and from the girl squad.

Martino is such an asshole! Silvia obviously extends her invitation to him and Gio out of politeness because they’re friends with the girl who helped her in a bad situation, she doesn’t know them and she was not obligated to invite them along. And while Gio manages to keep an appearance of politeness, Martino straight up mocks Silvia who’s been nothing but nice and enthusiastic towards Eva. That, in my book, is even worse than the two boys being their unsupportive selves yet again and telling Eva to get new friends, then not helping her make some. And that’s such a boys thing, honestly, to spot a problem and tell others to solve it but not help along!

and Silvia is so nice, she’s so good at driving the conversation along, keeping track of the social cues: she feels Eva doesn’t agree with the guys, so she extends her invitation again, then elbows Fede for some support, but she just makes things awkward so Silvia has to smooth things out, then she invites Eva again and is finally able to make plans, but she still has to diffuse the situation when she sees the boys are uncomfortable with Fede’s suggestive actions. So much emotional labour for just one conversation. Thankfully Eva helps her along a bit, cause no-one else does.

by the way, I totally understand and share Federica’s kind of humor and I love her

Marti’s face at Fede’s joke about psychotropic drugs though. Completely blank, just for a second.

I think it’s telling, though, that Federica is one with the weird actions and the weird humor nobody gets, because she’s the fat girl, so she gets pigeonholed as the comic-relief character: she does whatever comes to her mind, she doesn’t seem to pick up on social cues and she’s there mostly to make the other characters laugh or to make them look more refined, more clever or to say how cool they are; sure, she’s a good friend who stands up for Sana and Eva when it’s called for but her character could be way rounder

oh, guys. Marti and Gio’s reaction as soon as Silvia and Fede are out of earshot, it makes my heart bleed. The mocking, the casual fat shaming, the way Martino looks absolutely disgusted about that girl showing an interest in him

Ele acting aloof and dismissive of Silvia is not my favorite thing, I mean, I get not liking a person from the get go, but for God’s sake, come up with an excuse or something, there’s no need to be so blunt when she’s just inviting you to a party

you can actually subtly see Ele kind of relax when Fede arrives, she’s obviously much more her speed

and of course we have Sana, scathing Sana, picking up on Silvia’s racism straight away and calling her the fuck out but diffusing the situation with humor anyways

Silvia is looking for cool girls to make her own group since she’s been more or less kicked out of Laura’s; Silvia probably used to be the popular girls in her class, but Laura has taken that role from her, first integrating with Sara in Silvia’s friend group, then “overthrowing” her, despite only being in her class a few months, given that the transfer from Succursale, when Laura, Eva and Gio’s class was separated into groups that were merged with pre-existing classes, happened the previous September

(btw, Eva, Gio, Marti and Elia are in 4B, Ele in in 4A, so Silvia, Fede, Laura and Sara are in another class; Sana is probably in yet another class; and Luca could be either in the same class as Ele, as Silvia and Fede, as Sana or in another completely different class)

Eva hasn’t picked up on Silvia’s desperate desire to be one of the cool people yet, and Eleonora hasn’t explained it to her either? Pffft

OMG Silvia has an older sister???? I completely missed that the first time around! Hi Francesca Mirabella! You seem to be older and popular since you get into Villa guys’ parties, so you explain so much about Silvia

Ele has been at Kennedy high only for a month, so she might not know yet who the most popular people are yet, I can get behind that; but Eva? After 7 months? Not having the perception of the internal hierarchy of her school? Girl, please.

Eleonora dubs Edoardo “faccia da cazzo” and “capelli di merda” right away 👏👏👏

on the other hand, Sana seems to know the social hierarchy of both the school and her year very well, probably because she absolutely needs to in order to avoid at least some of the discrimination

Sana clearly has plenty of ideas about how to be popular, but she’s much better at preaching than at doing; Silvia wants to be liked by everyone, probably because of some complex she has about being in her sister’s shadow, but her solution is to be at the same time judgemental and a pushover; Sana’s brutal honesty and “advice” is meant more to hurt than to help Silvia become a better, more genuinely likable person; Sana’s probably lashing out because she was hurt by Silvia’s behaviour towards her

Federica is so clearly the comic relief in this scene, not one of her lines pushes the conversation along plus she acts like she’s completely oblivious to the tension between Silvia and Sana

yas for Eleonora who has the common sense to actually look for an alternative solution since they’re obviously not going to Martucci’s party, I like a practical girl

even at the club, Sana shows diffidence until the girls (probably Ele with some help from Fede) pull her in, drag her away from the bar so she can take selfies and dance with them; is she uncomfortable? Is she just trying to act cool? Is it a defense mechanism? Is she trying to keep away so people won’t look weirdly at the girls because they associate with the “terrorist”, is she afraid someone will say or do something?

seeing the girls dancing and having fun like gives me such a nostalgic feeling for those few (because I’m a really self-conscious motherfucker) parties in high school in which I was really able to have fun with my friends

Bechdel test: the episodes passes the test, with flying colors I might add, since there’s the conversation between Eva and Eleonora in the corridor after the theatre guys leave; Silvia thanking Eva and inviting her to the party; the whole scene with the girl squad in the courtyard, both when it’s just Ele and Eva, when Silvia arrives, when all five girls are present and when Sana leaves; finally, the first part of the conversation at the Baretto, when they’re talking about the party, then Edoardo is mentioned and it stops passing the test.

This post is part of my complete series of meta about Skam Italia season 1.  If you’d like to read more of my thoughts about the other episodes, you can find the mastepost linked in the top bar on my blog under SKAMIT: EVA. Cheers!

[what-even-is-thiss]

Sanders Sides Avatar AU Part 9

This is part of a multi chapter fic in an AU where Thomas is the avatar in an atla type universe. Refer to the intro and chapter list post for more details.

No warnings I can think of. Let me know if some are needed. 2,469 words.

Tip Jar

Intro and Chapter List

At the base of the mountain of the northern air temple was a small town creatively named Base Camp that acted as a tourist destination and a connection to the outside world for airbenders. Even in the two hundred years since the end of the great war the air nomad population was dangerously low. The airbenders all tended to stick together and move between the four air temples and air temple island in Republic City. Sometimes the community spread out, but never permanently. Some left for a while in pursuit of other careers or college but for the most part they returned to the community at one point or another.

The group parked the truck in Base Camp’s singular parking lot and argued about who to send. Patton seemed a logical choice, as Logan pointed out, however he lacked the determination to demand to see Thomas’ former teacher. So did Virgil. They decided on a compromise. Logan goes, but the others watch from the sidelines wearing a duplicate outfit so one of them can switch out if need be.

“That is one of the worst plans I have ever heard you come up with. And that includes your plan to sneak our dinner into the movies when you were in late secondary school.” Joan said.

“Yes, but it did work.” Logan pointed out.

“Weren’t you supposed to be the voice of reason around here or something?” Joan asked.

“I’m just stating facts.” Logan said, jumping out of the truck.

Joan, followed by a confused Talyn, jumped out of the truck too. They trusted that the other three would be able to follow through the trees and avoid security cameras. Niddy was being kept with Virgil because the dragon had been really clingy since he’d gone missing so they didn’t want him to randomly run off and give away any secrets.

The town had signs advertising air temple tours, careers as air acolytes, and cheap trinkets and fruit pies, but they were also accompanied a number of closed signs.

“This place is normally full of people.” Logan said. “This is highly unusual. It’s different.”

“Different scares you, doesn’t it?” Talyn asked. “This place sure creeps me out.”

“Fear of difference is illogical, so I personally am not afraid of it.” Logan said. “I can see how it would disturb you, though.”

“What does earthbending have to do with logic?” Joan asked. “Or this freaky abandoned tourist trap? It’s cold.”

“Wait, didn’t we tell you? We aren’t necessarily…”

“Thomas!” came a little voice. “Thomas is back!”

There was a group of about twenty small children under the age of nine being herded out of a shop by an air acolyte, judging by the orange robes. All of the children were wearing orange training uniforms, children’s play robes, or t-shirts and jeans with various tv and radio show logos on their backpacks.

One of the older children came running over quickly with a burst of air behind them. A little airbender. Talyn gasped at the realization all of these children must be airbenders. They had never met one before. Unless you count Patton, which doesn’t really work.

“I’ll bet you don’t remember me.” the little girl said sticking her tounge out.

“Jewel.” Logan said. “You got taller, but no less immature.”

“I am too mature!” Jewel said, blowing one of her many curly ponytails out of her face. “And I should be UP ON THE MOUNTAIN!”

She threw those last words behind her at the tired looking air acolyte who was holding a baby in his arms while a two year old clung to his leg.

“It’s not safe anymore.” the acolyte said like he’d said it a thousand times already.

“Aran, what’s going on?” Logan asked.

“It’s complicated. For right now though, I need to get these kids to town hall. They got to look at the shops. Come on, guys.”

Aran herded the children in a general direction. A four year old briefly broke away from the crowd and very importantly took something out of his inner coat pocket. It was an orange knitted hat with an airbending logo on it.

“I stole it from a shop.” they said very importantly. “But I want you to have it. Shhhhh. Don’t tell teacher.”

Then they ran back into the crowd just in time for Aran to count them.

“What just happened?” asked Talyn.

“I think I was given a stolen gift.” Logan said. “Do either of you want it?”

“But it’s stolen.” Said Talyn.

“I don’t care.” said Joan, putting it on.

“Neither do I.” said Logan.

Aran came back a minute later and noticed the hat Joan was wearing.

“Did Jess give you that?” he said.

“Yes they did.” Logan confirmed.

“They say they ‘steal’ everything, but really they just take the complementary things we give to guests and claim they stole it when they hand them out. You can keep that.”

“Cool.” said Joan. “Because it’s getting sort of cold.”

“We have coats.” Talyn reminded them.

“Yeah, but I didn’t feel like wearing one.”

“In any case,” Logan said, sounding very strict, “I would like permission to speak to master Xiong. Is he here?”

“He’s at the temple, but I’m not sure. We’re kind of in an emergency situation.”

What would Thomas do here? Let’s see. Old acquaintance, trouble brewing, desperate situation, adorable children screaming in the distance. He would be a bit anxious but happy to see his friend. Most likely using his “sunshine shtick” as his friends called it.

“C’mon, buddy. Whatever it is, I can do my best to help. And I really need some help. Please?” Logan said.

“Well, maybe I can get you a ride up. I’ll call.”

He made his way inside an abandoned shop and found a phone. Logan heard a “pssst” from behind a building.

“Hey flaw in the logic, switch out with Patton.” Roman scream-whispered from his hiding spot.

Logan went over. “Why would I do that?”

“Because what if you need to airbend?” came a voice from above.

Patton was sitting on top of a building holding a staff.

“And look! I finally found where we hid the glider!” Patton squealed in excitement.

“What? We lost that four years ago. Where was it?” Logan said.

“Inside a tree!” Patton said happily floating down.

He opened the glider. Unlike most gliders which were airbender orange, this one was earth kingdom green and beige and had “Thomas” written in very small print in the bottom corner of the left wing.

“We never even used it that much.” Logan insisted.

“Just switch out with him.” Said Virgil from behind a trash bin. “Aran could be back any second now.”

“Fine.” Logan grumbled.

Patton jumped down from the roof and Logan joined Virgil behind the trash bin, keeping track of where they were by feeling the vibrations in the ground through his hands.

“Okay, Xiong is happy to see you. And… is that your glider?” Aran said, walking back.

“Uh, yup.” Patton said awkwardly. “I just found it!”

“You lost it like…”

“Four years ago?” asked Joan, eyeballing Patton suspiciously.

“Probably.” Said Patton.

“Right, well Xiong is coming to get you himself in a few minutes. He’ll fly you up and explain on the way. I need to get back to the kids. They need as much help as they can get over there.” Aron said.

“Do you really trust Xiong this much?” Talyn said, remembering that morning’s discussion.

“Yes.” Patton said, strangely serious. “I do, one hundred and like, twelve percent.”

They sat on a bench and waited for a bison to fall out of the sky.

“So there’s something Logan said that’s been bugging me.” Joan said.

“What?” Logan asked from behind a nearby wall.

“Oh, right. You’re listening. Well, you were saying something about logic? Actually, you do seem to act weirdly logical for an earthbender. I don’t remember what exactly you said, but you know what I mean.”

“We’re imaginary.” Patton proclaimed.

“What?” asked Talyn, who had been spacing out and just came back to reality.

“Well we’re not imaginary right now.” grumbled Virgil.

“What?” asked Joan.

“This is way more complicated than necessary.” said Logan. “Remember that thing you told Thomas you do to calm yourself down? That kind of advanced talking to yourself?”

“Yeah?” said Joan.

“That’s it.” said Logan.

“What’s it? Who’s talking?”

Apparently a bison had descended from the sky without them noticing while they had been talking. And it had been carrying a middle aged man of medium height with straight black hair and acne scars all over his tan face.

“Master Xiong!” Patton exclaimed, bowing in respect.

“Thomas.” Xiong said, bowing back. “Am I hearing things?”

“No, these are my friends Joan and Talyn.”

Joan and Talyn clumsily bowed in respect.

“And this is the rest of me.” Patton said, gesturing towards the wall.

Logan walked out, followed by Roman dragging Vigil. You could tell it was Virgil by the sleep deprivation under his eyes.

“What?” Xiong said.

“It’s a very long story.” Roman said. “Full of adventure. Maybe we can explain on the way up, and you can explain whatever trouble you are in.”

Xiong looked at the other two young people standing there.

“Don’t worry. It really is him and you get used to the yelling.” Joan said.

On the ride up in the flying bison, Niddy flew alongside them and occasionally jumped back on to make sure all of Thomas was watching him. They all took turns explaining how Thomas had ended up split apart, as well as adding in why the pieces knew why they were when they split.

“It’s a therapy technique or something I dunno.” Virgil said.

“That spirit that attacked you sounds exactly like the spirit that attacked our temple, and the fire sages.” Xiong said.

“The fire sages?” asked Talyn. “Those people that guard the avatar temple in the fire nation?”

“Yes. And the spirit destroyed all the statues of firebending avatars they had. It destroyed our sanctuary as well. It was heading north, last time we saw it.” Xiong said, shaking his head. “And if you stay split up, what does that mean for the world?”

“We don’t know. That’s the problem.” Virgil said. “It would change everything, and everything does not have to be changed.”

“Are you really a waterbender? Really?” Roman asked.

“Why don’t I drown you and we’ll find out?” Virgil said.

“That doesn’t even make any sense.” Roman scoffed. “I’m happy to have you back, but your threats have not improved at all.”

“Anyways, I’m guessing you do not want the other airbenders to see you.” Xiong said.

“That would be ideal.” Logan said.

“I can take you to the bison stables and you can make your way to what is left of the sanctuary there if you want to contact Avatar Wang or any of the other avatars that have lived here, but I’ll admit I am sceptical.” Xiong said.

Patton beamed. “I believe in us, so much, and thank you so much for helping us. I can’t…”

“Do not, do not start crying again.” Logan begged.

Logan, Patton, and Virgil lay flat against the saddle as they flew over the temple and then stood up again as they landed near the bison. Talyn took the opportunity to throw up in a trash can from air sickness.

“Are you dying?” Virgil asked.

“They have air sickness.” Logan said.

“Yeah, I’d better take care of them. You go ahead.” Joan said.

Niddy went to comfort Talyn at Patton’s instruction. Xiong said he’d take care of them and that he’d tell the other airbenders not to go near the remains of the temple until they were done.

They walked through the familiar passageways Thomas hadn’t been in for four years. Virgil held the hooded black jacket they had bought in Ba Sing Se and not needed until now. Logan was wearing a more Thomas-esque brown jacket. Patton and Roman wereable to keep themselves warm with breathing. Virgil found this stunningly unfair. It was way too cold up here and autumn was approaching fast.

“You’re not going to find what you’re looking for, waterbender.” came the voice of fear.

“Yeah, whatever.” Virgil whispered.

“Did you say something, Verge?” Logan asked.

“No. Just trying to calm down.” he answered.

As they walked past the murals and tile formations, more and more chunks of the wall were missing. As they turned a corner, Patton and Virgil found themselves subconsciously grabbing each other’s hands as they saw the door.

The huge metal and wooden door that had led to the sanctuary was twisted and splintered beyond recognition. The pipes that held the door shut and would only yield to airbending were now bent. When they walked inside the damage was even more discouraging. There was a huge hole in the wall and the murals and statues of previous airbending avatars had been broken.

“What did we do?” Patton asked.

“Nothing.” Roman said. “Nothing at all.”

“You know that’s not true.” Virgil said. “We shouldn’t even be here.”

Roman took his other hand. Virgil didn’t push him away for once.

Meditating as a group turned out to be a bit awkward, especially since Thomas didn’t usually meditate at all, but they managed to sit in a circle and get their breathing in time. None of them really wanted to be doing this, so it took a long time. A really long time.

When Thomas finally opened his eyes, the sun had gone down and the moon was shining through the huge gaping hole in the wall. When he started it had been early morning. He expected to see someone, and he almost did. A person seemed to flicker in and out of view, but then they vanished.

“You’re not going to find what you’re looking for, Avatar.” came a voice.

“What?” Thomas asked, tears forming at the corners of his eyes.

“You’re looking in the wrong place, and as far as you know you always will be.” it said.

“Fear, I’m sorry.” he said.

“I know you are. We all know.”

“No, please!” He cried.

“No!” Roman screamed.

He stood up and screamed in rage, red hot fire spewing out of his mouth. He kicked a stone and hurt his foot on it, falling over.

Virgil was pulling the hood over his eyes. He was shaking. Patton ran forward and tried to calm Roman down. Cracks were appearing in the ground under Logan’s feet as he stood up.

“Was that your fault, waterbender?” came the voice in Virgil’s head.

“Shut. Up.” Virgil said through gritted teeth.

The other three looked back.

“It’s still talking to you, isn’t it?” Roman asked.

“No kidding.” Virgil said, not knowing if he was violently shaking from the cold or something else.

Previous Chapter  Next Chapter

[crowdvscritic]

round up // OCTOBER 20

Hubie Happy Halloween, friends! I’m not sure what October’s been like for you, but here’s a quick summary of my month:

Re-acquainting myself with my collection of (mostly gray and navy blue) sweaters

Ordering an embarrassing—like, I lost count kind of embarassing—number of lattés

Alternating between enjoying the ombré of the fall trees and cozying up with the first logs in the fireplace

Revisiting all-time favorite stories like The Scarlet Pimpernel by the Baroness Orczy, the extended Lord of the Rings movie trilogy, all three seasons of Stranger Things, the 1995 Pride and Prejudice miniseries, and several Harry Potter movies

In short, this month has been all about finding joy in the little things, which is the essence of our search for coziness in autumn. Since these monthly Round Ups only focus on pop culture that’s new to me, that means this month’s list is shorter than usual, but many of the movies and shows feel like warm blankets I’ll return to again. Though, as you’ll see, a few are not…

October Crowd-Pleasers

Enola Holmes (2020)

A movie so charming, I’m on the verge of rewatching even though it’s only been a few weeks. (It’s a rare occurrence for me to return to something so quickly.) It lets a stacked cast of performers known for dramatic roles flex their comedic muscles, including Henry Cavill, Sam Claflin, and—most spectacularly—Millie Bobby Brown. You can read my full review of the new Netflix movie at ZekeFilm. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 8/10

Murder, She Wrote (1984-96)

This entry comes with a bit of an asterisk* because Kyla and I watched this murder mystery procedural in 2018 for our podcast, SO IT’S A SHOW? At the time, I was open to watching more episodes, but it was never so easy as with the launch of the Peacock streaming service. All 12 seasons are available in the free tier, and I never thought a show about murder—and in the procedural format, which I don’t typically love—could be so enjoyable. Angela Lansbury’s mystery writer/amateur detective Jessica Fletcher has become a non-ironic role model for me—I aspire to be as gracious, intelligent, humble, uncynical, and assertive. Also, who says I’m not aspiring to spending my 60s writing, traveling, and solving crimes while wearing a fabulous collection of cardigans?

The Return of SNL

When Saturday Night Live returns in the fall, I always squeak out during the premiere’s opening credits, “My friends are back!” It’s a silly thing to say about an ever-rotating group of people I’ll never meet, but when you’ve been watching Kenan Thompson do his thing for close to two decades, you can only be delighted to see him after months of absence. While the “At Home” episodes this spring were a treat I didn’t think possible, it’s even better to have my friends back at it in their usual environment with the high production value of Studio 8H. These were the skits that made me laugh the most month:

“VP Fly Debate Cold Open,” mostly for the Jeff Goldblum tribute (4602 with Bill Burr)

“New Normal” (4602)

“Dr. Wenowdis on Weekend Update” (4602)

“Enough Is Enough,” a bit which explains my feelings about almost all celebrity political takes (4602)

“Canadian News Show” (4603 with Issa Rae)

“Election Ad” (4604 with Adele)

“The Bachelor” (4604)

For more on how this season has come together back in the studio, you can read the Vulture interview with Lorne Michaels about it.

Coach Carter (2005)

A based-on-a-true-story movie about an unconventional basketball coach (Samuel L. Jackson) who wants his players (including a baby Channing Tatum) to succeed on more than just the court. It’s a straight-down-the-middle story that shares DNA with many of the inspiring sports movies that came out in the wake of Remember the Titans, but it’ll scratch that itch if that’s what you’re looking for. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7.5/10

Double Feature — Early ’90s Halloween Classics: Edward Scissorhands (1990) + The Addams Family (1991)

Both of these movies start at Christmastime, but both are spooOOooky movies in their bones. Not all Halloween movies are Tim Burton movies, but all Tim Burton movies are Halloween movies, including Edward Scissorhands (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 8.5/10). Tim Burton is hit-or-miss for me, but I was pleasantly surprised at how moving this idiosyncratic fairy tale was. Johnny Depp is at his most tortured as a Frankstein’s monster whose inventor (Vincent Price) gave him scissors for hands, Dianne Wiest finds the heart and comedy in your local Avon representative, and Winona Ryder is a queen. The Addams Family (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10) might be even more idiosyncratic. I’ve never watched the TV series, so it took me a minute to warm up to its twisted sense of humor (“Are they made from real Girl Scouts?”), but once I did, I started laughing as often as my nostalgic parents.

The Magic iPod

A nostalgia kick you didn’t know you wanted. I have no idea why or how this site exists, only that it brings me joy. Try mashing up “Ms. New Booty” with “A Thousand Miles,” “Get Low” with “Float On,” “Tipsy” with Bring Me to Life,” “99 Problems” with “All Star,” “Country Grammar” with “Complicated,” or any other combo that brings your favorite songs from your first iPod together.

Hubie Halloween (2020)

You know those dumb movies that just hit you in the right spot? Adam Sandler has a knack for those kind of movies, and Hubie Halloween fills the void of Halloween fun you’re probably missing this year. Sandler plays Hubie, a not-very-bright do-gooder with a very big heart whose self-proclaimed purpose is to keep everyone safe in his hometown of Salem. But there are spooOOooky threats on Halloween night this year, and only Hubie and his thermos (which rivals a Swiss army knife in all its functions) will be able to save it. Don’t miss it you’re like me and love a good celebrity cameo and a Hollywood-designed Halloween costumes. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 6/10

Double Feature — Are We Sure These ‘80s Movies Are for Kids? Gremlins (1984) + Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988)

After seeing Gremlins (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10), I know why parents were clamoring for the PG-13 rating—this movie may be short on the scares for adults, but I have no idea what I’d do for a tyke not expecting the cuddly Gizmo to spawn homicidal ghouls. In what may be the most ‘80s movie I’ve watched yet, we get a legit bonkers story, both in premise and execution—and it might also be a brilliant and scathing satire of consumerism? Perhaps another spoof of consumerism: Who Framed Roger Rabbit (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8.5/10), which creates an impressively specific world that’s part animation, part live action. It’s a parody of classic film noir with no shortage of innuendo or just plain weirdness—its artistic achievement makes it worth watching, but since when have kids cared much about any of those things?

Double Feature — So-Bad-They’re-Good Action Flicks: Gone in Sixty Seconds (2000) + Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (2012)

If Gremlins is one of the most ‘80s movies, then Gone in Sixty Seconds (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 5.5/10) is one of the most Nicolas Cage movies. He’s a good guy caught on the wrong side of the law in a ridiculous plot engine where he has to steal 50 cars in less than a week. His pent-up frustration lives just below the surface, and his performance is so committed, you’re not sure if he’s knows  the dialogue and plot twists are zany—in fact, you’re not even sure he’s acting at all. Also committed to whatever the heck it’s doing is a movie that’s exactly what it sounds like, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 6/10). An over-qualified cast (Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Anthony Mackie, Rufus Sewell, and more) just goes for it in a story with the premise that Abe Lincoln fought oppression caused by slavery and by immortal blood-suckers. I think my favorite part is when a vampire throws a pony at our 16th president—I couldn’t make this up if I tried.

October Critic Picks

Triple Feature — ‘60s Horror Classics: Village of the Damned (1960), The Haunting (1963), Night of the Living Dead (1968)

In Village of the Damned (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8/10), everyone in a British village passes out at the same time for hours, and weird events continue for years, centering around a mysterious group of children. In The Haunting (above, Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 9/10), a group is studying events at a haunted house, but it may be the house that’s in control. And in Night of the Living Dead (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 9/10), the zombie genre dawns with a group huddled away from the undead in a farmhouse. All of these are thoughtful, well-made films, but I recommend them with asterisks* because I’ll never watch any of these groups again. The Haunting made me scared of bumps in the night as I was falling asleep, and Night of the Living Dead gave me zombie-filled nightmares. If you’re looking for a dose of heebie jeebies, these are the movies you’ll be needing!

2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)

I’m not sure I understood any of it, but I think I liked it? If you don’t mind a film that feels more like poetry than a plot, this visual stunner is worth the long runtime and straight-up weird sequence of scenes. Fortunately, I was prepped for my viewing with the help of Turner Classic Movies host Ben Mankiewicz and writer/director Brad Bird, who selected as part of this season’s Essentials lineup. While Bird loves the film, Mankiewicz admitted it’s not one of his favorites because it’s such an obtuse head-scratcher. Both acknowledged it’s an important one to cinema, so unless The Tree of Life is still making your brain hurt almost a decade later, it’s worth trying to parse through a story that covers the dawn of man, man’s fight against machine, and, um, a lot of other things I couldn’t explain if I tried. Crowd: 5/10 // Critic: 10/10

The Trial of the Chicago 7 (2020)

If you’re a fan of Aaron Sorkin’s idealist monologues and ideological pitter-patter, then pause your latest binge of The West Wing to watch his latest writing/directing outing, now streaming on Netflix. Based on the true story of protesters who clashed with the police outside the Democratic National Convention in Chicago in 1968—which, yes, doesn’t seem to difficult to imagine these days—it captures the spirit of a wild trial about political activism, healthy debate, fairness in government, and even the importance of grammar. If you watch it and think there’s no way this really happened, be sure to read up on the real trial to see how the film toned down the judicial circus. While this Oscars season will be unusual, we can predict this film will be in the awards conversation. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 9/10

Also in October…

My fellow ZekeFilm writers and I collected our favorite Halloween movies and TV specials for your enjoyment. Not-a-spoiler-alert: My pick is not very scary. In fact, it’s a zom-rom-com I’ve only come to love more since reviewing it upon its release.

Though Kyla and I always talk about Gilmore Girls on our podcast, we don’t just talk about the murder mystery TV shows it references like Murder, She Wrote. This month we talked about an ‘80s prime time soap full of shoulder pads and catfights as well as a ‘70s movie starring Rocky and the Fonz. Then we decided there were so many confusing pop culture references in an episode we couldn’t pick just one, so we researched a mish mash of topics like Punk Planet magazine, workout guru Jack LaLanne, singer Blossom Dearie, Manson cult member Leslie Van Houten, and a whole lotta board games.

540 movies and counting! You can follow real-time updates in what I’m watching in quarantine on Letterboxd.

[goblinmandoestvandfilm]

Horror

In TV and Film I have studied a range of Horror films, some comedy, some straight up heart wrenching, but each appeal to the horror’s narrative genre. The two I will be discussing are Happy Death Day and Don’t Knock Twice, these films are drastically different and both appeal to opposite audiences. In terms of their narrative structure as they follow a 5 faze structure.

This is targeted towards teens to young adults due to the horrific and terrifying nature of the films.

Happy Death Day

This film follows a non-linear story, tells the tale of the protagonist “Tree” who relives the same day due to her murder. The film is littered with plot twists and tries to make the character dislikeable from the very start, this makes the audience feel a strange distaste towards Tree, as she seems like a b*tch. As the film goes on we see the lighter and more frightened side of Tree, this combined with the comedic tones makes this film a lot more fun and lighter on death portion of things.

The visuals in happy death day may not be anything to write home about but it’s simplistic nature helps provide appealing tones to the story, an example of when this occurs is with the car seen. In this scene we see a car get exploded with Tree in the back, this was probably the limit in the film as all other visuals were either plain or boring, such as Tree jumping to her death.

The film’s location takes place on college grounds and because of this is very hyperactive.

The diegetic sound is louder in happy death day as this helps the audience understand what is actually going on, I wouldn't say there is anything special about it as most of the time characters are fighting or at a standstill. However, the nondiegetic sound was implemented quite well, an example of when used well was at Tree’s death, the jack-in-the-box happy birthday song was added over and made louder which helps us the audience anticipate the thrill.

According to Barthes Happy Death Day follows a closed narrative as there is a clear ending, Tree finds out who her killer is. the story follows the Hermeneutic code which means that not all facts are revealed from the start, his is very useful to see as we now that there a secrets being kept from us. Enigma is also used as tension is built through her deaths.

Propp’s theory

Hero=Tree

Villain=Lori

Donor=Carter

Helper=Carter

Princess=Carter

Princess’ father=none

Dispatcher=Carter

False Hero=Teacher and murderer

Most places in Propps theory are failed, this is good as it shows us how Tree rose up to the occasion and found her murderer.

This story uses a lot of plot twists, like the fight scenes, and Red Herrings, the real killer, which leaves the reader going off track a bit and causes a lot of misleading ideas which stir up in the viewer’s mind. This makes for a very compelling story as the odd uplifting tone leaves me thinking if this movie is really a horror film.

Don't Knock Twice

Unlike Happy Death Day, Don’t Knock Twice creates subtle undertones of a gloomy atmosphere, this helps to elevate the mise en scene as we see the surroundings in the opening. Don't knock twice is about a haunting demon who wants remain on our main character because of a framed child napping, which the demon (who is the old lady got blamed for), the thing about don't knock twice is the absence of the mother who put her child into care before these events transpired, it’s this absence of the motherly figure which represents the lack of maternity the daughter has for her mother making the poltergeist like scenes more thrilling.

Don’t Knock Twice portrays a more linear stories and can be related to more recent horrors as they both carry the same tropes.

The visual in don't knock twice were dark and gloomy in a positive sense, they helped portray drama and action, the design of the witch seemed very unnatural but yet humanlike, I will admit it wasn't anything special but it still helped carry the story.

The sound on the other hand was alright and full proof, Don’t Knock Twice is good at portraying its diegetic sound in a way that is mainly used when the characters are engaged in some sort of dialogue, an example being the mother doing her statue making. To add to this, the nondiegetic sound is mainly used between transition and jump scares, i would say the music implemented helps scenes reach climax, I would also say that most of the orchestral music they used helps heighten the tension for the introduction of the demon.

Barthes follows a closed narrative and follows a linear story. The enigma is widely used to build up tension as the monster is a key part of the production. The symbolic code, shows the underlying meanings of the text. these features help make the horror more terrifying and thus makes it a more impactful to watch.

Propp’s theory

Hero=mother and daughter

Villain=the demon and police man

Donor=the mother in some aspects

Helper=Tira

Princess=none

Princess’ father=none

Dispatcher=Chloe

False Hero=demon

Propp’s theory helps us understand roles of the characters in Don’t Knock twice there are absent roles which helps convey the isolation and independence our heroes have.

Don't Knock Twice can relate to McGuffin as there seems to be a set focus to the film as we see the main characters constantly trying to find a way to get out of the mess they are in. An element of Red Herring can also be seen; the orphaned girl looks for clues online but quickly gets debunked by some spiritual customer her mother serves. These minor things help give the story some depth and partial meaning.

Both

To fully compare both “horror” films we should analyse their narrative structure. Firstly, Happy Death Day starts off as appearing as a teenage drama/romantic comedy which quickly takes a turn for the worst when her killer suddenly emerges from under a bride with a happy birthday theme being played from a wind-up toy. The idea of relating horror to children-esc themes makes the horror more exciting, this opening scene is the mise en scene as the lighting low camera angles and over the shoulder shots all contribute to the eerie feel of the scene and make her first death seem a lot more realistic. If we compare this to Don't knock twice we are quickly met with a lot darker themes as the lighting seems dimmer and the overall atmosphere is the complete opposite to that of happy death day, an example being Happy Death Day primarily taking place in the day, while Don’t Knock Twice taking place either indoors or at night, it’s these themes that make these seem like binary opposites. Don’t Knock Twice uses young teen/adult orphans who have a lot of street smarts to represent a rumour of a haunted house, while this is still going on we see the daughters original mother taking custody of her. These mystical and controversial tones help make the opening that more dramatic as we see the way each character feels and reacts to events that have transpired in the past.

After the initial shock in Happy Death Day our main character Tree eventually susses out that she is living the same day twice, while newly met acquaintance Carter eventually finds out, but this is only after a few more deaths, he devises this plan to have Tree to get killed in a range of ways in order to figure out who her murderer really is. This time in production relates to the build-up, problems and events, this is a unique way to relate to narrative structure as it seems most of the action takes place in a same/familiar way, for example Tree waking up in Carter’s room every day, from these similar areas help us the viewer really feel like we now the layout of the college. However, unlike it’s opposite counterpart Don’t Knock Twice uses the same location but different areas to make the viewer seem more scared, giving of this feeling of isolation and mystery. The build-up, problems and events of this film include lots of blood and jump scares, the loss of a best friend/metaphorical brother Danny and the introduction of the demon who wants them dead. It’s the fear of the unknown that makes these scenes so crazy, one moment we see the demon but suddenly it’s gone. Overall to compare these parts of the narrative structure ends in two different but satisfying build up to watch.

Finally the resolution and ending, in Happy Death Day we see an unusual turn from regular structure, that being the murderer framing someone else who also turns out to be a harsh murderer, this plot twist revived the film as it started to get duller and duller similar to Tree, as we were witnessing the recurring themes of the film, after this though we found you the real killer was her roommate who poisoned her cupcake, however the reasoning was a silly lovers quarrel and doesn't relate to the fact that Tree was a horrible person before her deaths, the ending is also odd as its cool she survived but the end confrontation was overboard by a lot, this is clearly evident through how she killed both with over the top action e.g. she literally flung her roommate out of the window and still didn't get arrested for manslaughter? I think it's these moments in this “horror” which clearly went overboard. On the other hand, the resolution and ending of Don’t Knock Twice leaves me with subtle confusion, this film is a horror at its core and its because of this i actually think this film is good, but its plot holes is what lets it down, the plot of the film tries to intertwine all these mythological points which don't translate to film very well. But at the end of the day the acting and various shots at the ending leaves a good atmosphere but leaves something to valued. Overall, both movies lose their track during their initial endings and because of this leaves something to be desired.

Conclusion

Overall Happy Death Day can be seen as a more comedic horror which shies away from what the typical horror can be classed at, the binary opposite to this is Don’t Knock Twice which stays to the typical chains of what a regular horror stand for. If I had to compare these horror films i would say the versatility of both allowed me to grasp and have a better realisation of what horror films are about. This can be beneficial in analysing action next as I will be able to assess what makes a livelier film fun.

[fereality-indy]

Wendip Week 2017 5+1

5+1

Friday June 14th, 2019 Dipper Pines residence 412, Gopher Road, Gravity Falls, Oregon

“Alright, well let’s see.” Dipper said as he looked around his converted warehouse loft, “Picnic basket, cooler, six pack of Pitt, blanket, bug spray and…”

Dipper began patting his pockets, searching the basket, the cooler, and he finally found the green velvet box in the fridge. He must have set it down when he pulled out the ice for the cooler. He was just about to start taking everything out to the El Diablo when his phone went off.

Seeing it was Wendy he answered, “Hey Wendy, I’ll be over in fifteen, just need to get the supplies in the car and I’ll be on my way”

From the other end of the line he heard, “The picnic is gonna have to wait Dip. Lil Seth just showed up at my door all battered and bruised. Apparently dad, Rudy, and Lucas got into a row with a group of Manotaurs. Seth was able to get away because he was in a different clearing when it started. I’m about to head out and save my family.”

“I’m on my way, I’ll be there in five. Wait for me.” He said as he say the little green box down on the kitchen island and rushed out of the door. He spent the rest of the day explaining to two groups of walking testosterone that fighting was not always the best answer.

Thursday June 27th, 2019 Poseidon’s Gravity Falls, OR

‘Ok, this might be a better idea,’ Dipper thought as he and Wendy were led by Jean Luc to a corner table. Thanks to some of Gideon’s contacts preparations were made, the staff knew what he was planning to do, a bottle of sparkling cider is waiting at the table, Wendy’s favorite desert was waiting to be brought out after dinner, and he had the little green velvet box in his pocket. Nothing could go wrong.

About half way through their salads it did. In a flash of pink and purple the Pines twins favorite blonde rushed into the restaurant. Pausing only long enough to hand Jean Luc a small stack of bills, Pacifica rushed over to the couple’s table.

“Hey Pacifica, what’s wrong?” Wendy asked as Mabel’s girlfriend made it to the table.

“No time to talk. Mabel’s in trouble,” Pacifica stated as she grabbed her two friends and started heading towards the door.

It turns out that a rogue group of gnomes decided that Geoff had been to lenient in his earlier dealings with the Pines twins and decided to claim Mabel as their own queen. The rest of the night was spent lugging two battery powered leaf blowers through the woods to rescue Mabel.

Tuesday July 9th, 2019 On State Highway 245 Heading Baker City, OR

'Well this trip is already not going the way it was supposed to be going.’ Dipper thought as drove up towards north east Oregon.

Over the weekend Ford learned from a former colleague/renewed acquaintance that the Baker City Oregon Trail Museum had received a donation of collection that had some pieces that carried a certain set of symbols. Ford asked Dipper to go check it out as he due back on land for another week. Dipper in turn asked Wendy if she wanted to come along.

They had planned on staying two or three days, mostly in order for them to get some 'them time’ without any of the townsfolk coming to them asking for help. He had just finished up packing his suitcase, including the green velvet box, and his testing equipment, when he heard his front door close.

“Hey man you in here?” Wendy called as she navigated the converted warehouse.

“In the bedroom,” he called out.

“I have some great news. I just got off of the phone with gentleman from the State Forestry Department and I have an interview for the Ranger position that opened up just outside of town.” She called back as she headed up the stairs to the bedroom.

“That’s great. You’ll be perfect for the job.” Dipper replied as he zipped his suitcase closed. As he turned around he saw her standing in the doorway looking crestfallen. He rushed over to her, “Wendy, what’s wrong?”

“Oh, no. I’m sorry man. I got so excited about the job interview that I forgot about the trip,” she said as she fidgeted with the keys still in her hands.

“That’s ok, we’ll just do a light diner and you can go home and pack.” He said as he gently kissed her on the tip of her nose.

“That’s just it Dip, I don’t even have time for dinner. The interview is tomorrow morning in Salem. I’m heading out once I’m done here so I can hopefully get a hotel room for the night.” Wendy said as she looked into his chocolate brown eyes. “I’m sorry Dipper, I know you wanted this so we’d have some time to ourselves.”

Dipper pulled her into a hug and said, “Go to your interview, this is the job you’ve wanted since even Gideon could stop ordering from the kids menu. So go do your interview, nail it, and we’ll take a weekend to go celebrate when you get the job.”

“You’re right,” Wendy said as she hugged him even deeper. As she pulled back she gave him a quick kiss. “Well I better get going.”

“And remember you can nail this interview and get this job cause you’re a flippin Corduroy!”, he said as he was walking out to her truck with her.

As she sat down in the driver’s seat Dipper leaned in and gave her another kiss, “Be safe out there. Love you.”

“Love you too.” She said as closed the door and started the engine. She then rolled down the window and said, “You be safe too. Call me if it starts to get hairy up there.”

“I will.” He said just before she pulled out of the driveway and headed to the main road out of town.

And this is why he spent two days meticulously going through the Baker City Oregon Trail Museum’s donations and only found an Incan coin with a pyramid relief on it and an earthenware dish that carbon dated as being somewhere between forty and forty- five years old and what the curator thought may have been Cipher emblem looked more like Floyd’s 'Dark Side of the Moon’. It was probably some stoner’s attempt at an earthenware dish.

Wednesday July 17th, 2019 Mystery Shack Gravity Falls, OR

Dipper looked around after the 'Welcome Home Stans’ party had died down and most of the town had went home. Still around were Wendy, Soos, Melody, the Stans, Mabel, Pacifica, McGuket, Robbie, Tambry, Candy, and Wendy’s family. Maybe this is what the universe was wanting him to wait form everybody they cared for to be in one place.

As he walked into the room where everyone had gathered, he saw Robbie and Tambry had sequestered themselves in a corner enjoying a night without little May. Pacifica and Mabel seemed to be in world of their own after one two many glasses of Mabeljuice. Stan and Soos were playing with little Let while his mother Melody was trying to get him to settle down for the night. Ford and McGuket were going over the result of the testing Dipper has done in Baker City. Surprisingly Candy and Wendy’s middle brother Lucas were dancing to the music that was still playing in the background. Manly Dan and the other brothers were watching Lucas in the act. He felt his pocket to make sure the velvet box was still there. Because finally there was the beauty that is Wendy Corduroy, who was walking straight towards him. He was so distracted by her He failed to notice the ice bucket had been spilled. He stepped onto the loose and melting ice. Like something out of an eighties comedy movie he kept sliding till he finally fell at the base of the Sascrotch, which the fell right on top of him. After a couple of moments under it the only plan he had remaining was to go home embarrassed.

Friday July 26th, 2019 Route 2 Heading Out Of Town

Dipper had his bag packed as soon as he returned from Baker City. He knew Wendy would get the job, heck she could probably teach the other Rangers a thing or three about working in the woods. So when she got the call on the 19th? He was ready to head out then but she decided to wait till the following weekend as she had told Soos she would cover a day so he and Melody could have a day off with the kids.

The velvet box say snugly in his pants pocket as he drove on out of town with Wendy by his side. They were on there way out of town.

“Alright I’ve got us a hotel room for two nights, tickets to see 'Purple Moon” the band Robbie’s old drummer is in, and directions to Portland’s best hamburger joint.“ Dipper said as they headed towards the canyon pathway out of town.

"Cool, I’ve been wanting to check them out since Robbie told me she joined a band while in college. I mean she was the best…” Wendy was saying when the car started making a loud noise and then the engine just died. “Whoa, what happened?”

“I’m not sure,” Dipper said as he tried to start the engine to no avail, “I just had it serviced last month.”

He reached down and put the car in neutral, “Can you scoot over and I’ll push use on to the side of the road.”

As soon as Wendy got in the driver’s seat, Dipper began pushing. After a couple of minutes they had the Diablo on the side of the road.

He walked on up to the window and asked, “Can you pop the hood, maybe it’ll be something one of us can figure out.”

Wendy did as asked and then got out to help her dork look under the hood. While she’s no greasemonkeyn she has learned the basics. After about fifteen minutes they both threw up their hands in defeat.

“Alright I can’t figure it out. You?”, Dipper asked as he put a hand on the good.

“Sorry Dip, not a clue.” Wendy said as she pulled back and let Dipper shut the hood.

“Well we can still reach Soos and ask him to come tow us. And then we can still make it to the hotel and the show if we get your truck.” Dipper said as he leaned against the hood. He saw Wendy’s face drop, “What’s wrong?”

“Well we hadn’t planned on being in town so I loaned my truck to Lucas she he could run Candy to a tech show down across the state lines. They seem to have really hit it off.”

“Man, let’s just get picked up and call it a night.” Dipper said as he laid back on the hood. Looking up at the sky Dipper thought, 'Man. Maybe I should just give up. Someone or something just doesn’t want me to get this done.’

After her call was done and Soos was on his way she leaned back and laid her head across his chest. She had nearly fallen asleep to the rhythm of his heart beat when they both heard the unmistakable sound of Soos’ old truck.

“You doods ok?” Soos asked through the lowered passenger side window.

“Yeah, just a little frustrated.” Dipper said as he slid off of the hood.

Wendy helped guide Soos so that he was lined up with the front of car and then they set about hooking the town cables.

“Alright Dipper, you steer the Diablo and Wendy you hop in the truck with me. I’ll tow it on over to the Shack, Hank knows the way there and can come get it easier for you.” Soos said as he was walking around to the driver’s side.

“Sounds good. Then you can drop me off before you take Wendy back to her apartment.” Dipper said as he started to get into the car.

“But…”, Wendy started before she was cut off.

“Wendy honey, I know this was all my idea and we both want to spend the weekend together. But this mess here has given me a massive headache and right now all I want to do is go to bed and get the day over with,” He said with a wane smile, “We’ll get together tomorrow and figure out what to do with the rest of the weekend.”

And despite a protest when they got to his converted warehouse, he still went in alone.

(Still) Friday July 26th, 2019 Dipper Pines residence 412, Gopher Road, Gravity Falls, OR

“…and let Jackie know that we’re not going to make it to the concert so there’s no need to go ahead with the plan. Thank her again for me for trying and thanks again Robbie for setting this up.” Dipper said into the phone. He was sitting alone on his bed in the dark, “I dunno man, I beginning to wonder if someone out there doesn’t want this to happen. This was the fifth time my plans were shish kebabed.”

And from the doorway he heard, “Ya know man, if want to do something with me it’s best to just do it.”

“Wait, what?” he said as he jerked around and saw Wendy standing in the doorway.

Misinterpreting his reaction she blushes, “I don’t mean it like that.”

Into the phone Dipper said, “Look I need to go Wendy’s here. Yeah, yeah smartalec. Alright, talk at you later.”

“Well, so you were talking to Robbie? And you guys had something planned for this weekend?” Wendy askes as she walked into the darkened bedroom. Reaching over she turned the dimmer switch on so there was a faint glow of light in the room.

“No, no it was nothing.” Dipper said as he got up and started towards her, “What are you even doing here? I said we’ll get together tomorrow.”

“Well maybe I decided that I didn’t want my boyfriend to suffer alone. Maybe I decided that I would be here so whatever we decided to do tomorrow we could get right to it.” she started out sounding a little upset. but then with a smirk she added, “Maybe I caught my brother and his new girlfriend on my couch in flagrante delicto and wanted to let you know we have the truck again.”

“Wait a minute, Lucas…” Dipper asked almost completely forgetting the previous part of the conversation.

“Uh, huh.” Wendy nodded as she wrapped and arm around her boyfriend.

“and Candy?”, He continues. Still trying to wrap his head around it.

“Both had their shirts off and she had a strap down when I coughed to let them know I was there.” she said with a chuckle. “I suggested that he take her home and that next time they find somewhere other than my apartment to have their fling. They were both redder than his hair.”

“Man that would have been fun to see.” He said returning her smirk.

Raising an eyebrow she said “Really? So you want to see Candy topless?”

“No, no. I didn’t mean that I wanted to see Candy topless,” He said defending himself, “I just meant the whole embarrassed situation.”

“Chill Dip, I knew what meant I was just busting your chops.” She said as she kissed him on his forehead.

“So what were you and Robbie planning for this weekend?” She smiled as he started to cluster at the question.

“What? Nothing.” he tried saying before she shot him down with a 'I was standing here for a good moment’ look. Resigned be started, “Ok, for over a month now I kept making some plans to do something and it always seems like something comes up and ruins my plans. Your family getting into a fight with the Manotaurs, the gnomes kidnapping Mabel again, my clumsiness, and tonight the car breaking down. It’s like someone doesn’t want me to carry out my plans.”

“Nah, I wouldn’t go that far. Remember when it comes to what we have here, plans don’t work for us. We work better going by the seat of our pants. Remember that whole scheme that ended up with us dating. And remember the dance that first summer? I know you had a twelve step plan to ask me to dance, Mabel told me about it, but as you found out all you had to do was just ask.” she said as she let him go and turned back to brighten the dimmer switch. She heard him say “You’re right!” and as she turned back around she saw he was down on one knee.

As Wendy brought her hands up the her face, Dipper pulled the green velvet box out of his pocket. As he opened the box holding the cut emerald ring he asked, “Wendy Berble Corduroy, would you make me the happiest guy alive?”

She grabbed his wrist and pulled him into a passionate kiss. As they separated Dipper asked, “So is that a yes?”

“Of course it is you dork,” Wendy said before she kissed him again.

“Well at least I’m your dork,” he said as he placed to ring on her finger.

“Yes you are.”

[ramblesandmumblesofanerd]

Rambling Reviews: Sherlock Hound

Warning: Lengthy Post Which Contains Minor Spoilers

When people are reminded of the name Hayao Miyazaki, one tends to remember his career in cinematic Japanese animations. This man has quite a lengthy resume of films, including Ponyo, Porco Roso, Nausica, The Cat Returns, Howl’s Moving Castle, Princess Mononoke, and my all time favorite of his films Spirited Away. But beneath the piles of films that have made their way to the US, there is one lesser known project Miyazaki worked on that I have come to enjoy immensely. From 1984, created from the combined efforts of Hayao Miyazaki and Kyouske Mikuriya, I present to you the Italian-Japanese animated series “Sherlock Hound”.

Now, from the title alone, this sounds like a silly idea. I mean, come on, it is literally Sherlock Holmes, the iconic detective of nineteenth century London made by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle as a dog. It sounds like it is going to be a silly cartoon with tons of elements to appeal to kids. And to be fair, you wouldn’t be blamed for thinking so, but you would be only partially right. While it is true that this series does feature a cast of anthropomorphic characters, all of whom are some breed of dog, it is surprisingly not that distracting and doesn’t take center stage. They don’t have Sherlock sniffing the ground for clues like a dog normally would, but they do utilize his heightened sense of smell whenever the story requires it. They have legitimate mysteries in each episode, but they also have goofy bad guys with gadgets. The characters use actual guns with actual bullets, but no one gets hurt. So, what I’m saying is while this show does have a child friendly concept with colorful imagery, it finds a way to balance things out by having more mature elements like thought provoking mysteries and memorable characters.

Speaking of, let’s get acquainted with those characters, shall we? We first have the titular Sherlock Hound, voiced by Larry Moss (the Elder from “Happy Feet”). Unlike his human counterpart from BBC’s Sherlock, Hound is a bit more warm and caring in spite of his eccentricities. He enjoys the company of his friends and colleagues, such as the headstrong Doctor Watson (voiced by the late Lewis Arquette) and the sweet Mrs. Marie Hudson (voiced by Patricia Paris, aka Kanga from Winnie the Pooh), and can even tolerate children, playing along with most of their games. Also, you won’t find him in his a depressed demeanor, unlike his namesake, nor will you find him partaking in drugs unless you count the tobacco pipe constantly in his mouth. However, in spite of these changes, he remains the ever dedicated detective capable of solving any mystery that comes his way either by the request of the bumbling Detective Inspector Lestrade (voiced again by Lewis Arquette) or by sheer chance.

But every Sherlock cannot function for long without their personal Moriarty, the criminal who discovered personal freedom by rejecting societal norms. But how does Sherlock Hound handle the iconic villain? Well, I will say that if you are looking for a Victorian criminal mastermind, you will not find him here, sadly. What you will find, however, is an amusing if not cheesy display made by the late Hamilton Camp, a veteran voice actor/songwriter/composer. Clad in an all white get up consisting of a three piece suit, cape, top hat, cane and monocle, he is the epitome of campy bad guys, proclaiming his genius at the beginning of every episode only to be defeated in a variety of embarrassing ways. With the questionable help of his bumbling henchmen Smiley and Todd (voiced by Larry Moss and Lewis Arquette again), he plans to steal whatever riches he can get his gloved hands on through the power of gadgets and trickery. I do have to admit, this is an amusing interpretation of the character, in spite of him being a polar opposite of his original counterpart. He is always so sure of himself, and, to be fair, he is quite brilliant in his brand of villainy as he does get away with a lot of crimes right from under the nose of the inept Scotland Yard until Sherlock Hound inevitably corners him.

Which reminds me, there is one aspect of the show that might seem formulaic at first glance. Most of the episodes seem to follow a similar flow of events: Moriarty commits a crime, Scotland Yard is too incompetent to catch him, Sherlock follows the clues to the inevitable encounter between him and the villain, and a defeated Moriarty runs away with Scotland Yard at his tail. While this may seem a tad repetitive, the real content comes from the mystery and build-up to it’s conclusion. Each mystery is different, with some not even having Moriarty as the main villain (though these episodes are admittedly somewhat rare). My two favorite episodes which break the conventional mold are “Mrs. Hudson is Taken Hostage”, which features Moriarty obviously taking Sherlock’s housekeeper as leverage, and “The Bell of Big Ben”, a Moriarty focused episode featuring the Professor trying to prove to all of London that he has indeed stolen the bell straight from the iconic clock-tower. Sure some pieces of the formula are still present, but the occasional divergence certainly livens up the show from time to time.

But a cartoon is nothing without cohesive, proper animation, and Sherlock Hound is no exception. I must say that the animation done by Tokyo Movie Shinsha is pretty well done for the time Sherlock Hound was released. The characters are colorful, yet the palette is not so bright that the audience is blinded. The animation feels solid and less rubbery than most modern day cartoons. The backgrounds range from lush and warm to dark and terrifying whenever the story demands it. The only nitpicky complaint I would have to make would be the sometimes dodgy lip-syncing seen in the English Dub. Sometimes random noises will come out of character’s mouth when there was undoubtedly dialogue in the original Japanese Dub, but I’m willing to overlook this due to the time when this anime was dubbed.

Speaking of which, how is the dub? Well...it’s hit and miss to me personally. While I do enjoy the voice acting of the main characters, a lot of the background characters sound a tad awkward, and I believe I know the reason why. Sadly, it seems that the studio only had a few voice actors, and thus numerous background characters will have the same voice actor as Sherlock or Moriarty. While this is not too much of a problem for characters like Todd and Smiley (again voiced by Sherlock and Watson’s voice actors), other minor characters have voices that are too similar to the main cast to ignore. However, I feel that the sheer campiness of the dialogue, especially from Moriarty, makes up for this admittedly minuscule complaint. There is also the fact that the equipment used to record all of the voice acting at the time pales in comparison to modern day technology, but this doesn’t bother me too much personally either.

All in all, as a fan of Sherlock Holmes and anime, I cannot recommend this show enough. While some features may feel a tad dated in comparison to modern day cartoons, the antiquity actually helps in making this show feel like a genuinely unique viewing experience. The basic premise of Sherlock Holmes as a dog goes from being a silly idea to a well executed concept within the first episode. The characters are fun to watch, the villain is riot, the mysteries (while not complex) are amusing, the animation is spot on for the time period, and the voice acting is, for the most part, passably enjoyable. If you want to watch Sherlock Hound, you can watch it for free at the TMS Entertainment YouTube channel (though, for some reason, the episodes are out of order, as you can see on the official Wikipedia page).

But in the meantime, never stop rambling, TM

Thanks to @sherlysthougths, a massive fan of Sherlock Holmes, for introducing me to this show.

Reblogs are always appreciated. YouTube version: Yet to be made.

[thetumblingtiger]

“Don’t worry Phantom, I’ve got this one!”

“The ghost ran away in the five seconds you spared it and distracted me so you could say that.”

“… Oh.”

(turned out REALLY LONGER THAN I EXPECTED, so I put a break =P)

Crossover (au I guess?) in which Phoenix decides to stay in Amity Park rather than uh, that building (roof? church tower? idk) and learns about Danny Phantom so he decides to try taking up being a superhero in his free time (he has a lot), straight down to having a “secret identity” (I’m unsure if he ends up enrolling into school just for the sake of making it authentic, but if he does UM GOOD LUCK DANNY AND COMPANY)

But there’s just one little problem with Akai wanting to be a superhero.

He does not get any of it at all.

I mean at first Danny is pretty excited at the idea of having someone else around to help keep the ghosts at bay (chance to pick up his grades and train and maybe even chill a lil’ bit YES PLEASE) but it’s made pretty clear pretty fast on just how much work it’s going to take getting Akai into shape as a superhero (“But why do you keep your identity a secret? It seems like so much work.” ”So I wasn’t supposed to try defeating you too? Why didn’t you say so in the first place?” “What is a ‘quip’?” - that last one in particular hurts Danny deep inside upon hearing the question.)

So much for that free time (especially because at first Akai sees it as a game; he’s not doing it to be helpful.) Also cue the learning curve for all of those involved in training Akai in how to disguise himself as a human (aka; teaching him how to generally act like a human and how human things work which is mostly Tucker’s and Sam’s job- Tucker does modern day tech (he mostly brings Akai to the movies and calls it training) and Sam catching Akai up on the last three-thousand years of human history n stuff- although she does like hearing about the correct version of certain things Akai was around for before he was sealed away) how to do the superhero stuff (Danny’s job through and through) and then the morality and psychological things he doesn’t quite get (Jazz is the one tasked with this because when Akai asks they’re like “Go ask Jazz”, though Danny sometimes helps when field training by being an example. Kinda. When it matters at least.)

It’s a TON of work but hey, it was that or just let the flaming chicken run free to cause chaos which would probably be more trouble. And frankly Danny doesn’t want to test that sooo, training it is!

At least there are some benefits to this whole thing though~

For one, the group gets a new friend (granted Akai is an alien and he doesn’t always want to hang out with them and he randomly disappears for days sometimes, but he’s nice enough, especially later on). Jazz is most pleased by this development, since she’s always nagged Danny that he needs to make more friends (and even if that nagging was lessened A LOT after she discovered his double life, she’s always still thought it’d be good for her little brother to have a few more acquaintances, though a bird alien wasn’t quite what she’d expected to answer her prayers.)

Another is that the work does pay off and Akai gets to save the day as “Phoenix” (it’s his actual alien name and the gang decides that, hey it works) while Danny can have some more time for himself to do homework, train with his ghost abilities (actually, Phoenix makes for a good sparring partner when not chasing you down with a giant dog he’s mind-controlling), and just relax.

Of course there are still hiccups along the whole way like Vlad Masters/Plasmius, Dr. Neo catching wind of “his” alien hanging in Amity Park, and then when Joker shows up himself.

(Yeah, he swings into Amity Park to steal something he finds interesting of course, and in turn Team Phantom finds out that Akai has been playing at being a phantom thief during his disappearances.)

And that’s the general idea of what happens~ (there’s more but it got to be just a lot of words so eh.)

But here’s some minor things about the Phantom Phoenix au*:

- “Akai” and “Phoenix” are the gang’s way to differentiate between the two forms, much like “Danny” and “Phantom” for Danny’s when others are around (of course.)

- When Joker visits he doesn’t believe Amity Park is haunted by ghosts. He actually doesn’t believe it for the longest time (”MR. JOKER, IT WENT. THROUGH. THE WALL.” “Smoke, mirrors and lasers.”) and it takes having Danny shove some ghost abilities in his face to make him realize that yes there are ghosts.

- When Dr. Neo and Vlad team up they can actually be pretty terrifying.

- Phoenix still isn’t big on the part of being a superhero where he has to save humans but decides that ghosts are worse (especially the Box Ghost.)

- Phoenix’s quips almost never work and Danny is so disappointed in his student.

- Sam at one point tries to convince Akai into becoming an ultra-recyclo-vegetarian. He does not get.

- Tucker tries to teach Akai how to pick up chicks (he takes that literally at first and wonders why they need to pick up chicken babies), but unfortunately Akai doesn’t seem interested in girls. Or guys. Or humans in general (Tucker needs to stop.)

- First encounter with water does NOT end well (”NO ONE SAID THERE WOULD BE WATER!” “Oh come on, it’s not like you’ll melt.” “YES I DO!”)

- “You do realize that Phoenix is spelled with a “Ph” and not an “F”, right?”

- All of Amity Park calls Phoenix “Wingman” for the longest time. (When Danny mentions this to try and tease him Akai will shoot back with “Invis-o-bill”. It remains unknown which friend sold Danny out on that one it was probably Tucker.)

- Danny and Akai like to stargaze together and Akai is great at pointing out constellations.

- Jack Fenton thinks Akai is a ghost of course. (He’s totally wrong, but nice try man.)

- Akai only sucks Danny into the thermos a few times (he’s not allowed to touch it for a long time.)

- Whether or not Akai enrolls into school (he probably ends up randomly visiting), he still has an encounter with Dash while hanging around Nasty Burger with the gang. Dash attempts bullying only for Akai to flip him onto his back. After that he’s never targeted again.

- When challenging Joker in other countries Phoenix practices quips on him. All who witness are confused.

- Akai’s favorite part about being a superhero is the part where he has to find a hiding place to turn into Phoenix (it’s probably the only reason he chose to go with the secret identity thing- for the part that’s like hide-and-seek.)

- (I’ll add more things as I think of them!)

(*Yes I am calling it that. DON’T. Stop me noooooow~)

So there you guys go; something I spent way too much time on! (Including the Butch Hartman style mimic, though I’m cool with it not being exact.) Feel free to pick up and do whatever with this au~ (Heavens knows if I’ll do anything ever again. XP)

((It’s official- I need to stop watching Danny Phantom and making aus/crossovers/both and drawing Akai but won’t because why should I do things like work on my own original ideas))

[chicagocityofclans]

Micah Toll → John Cho → Rat

→ Basic Information

Age: 81

Gender: Male

Sexuality: Straight

 Born or Made: Born

Birthday: August 2nd

Zodiac Sign: Leo

Religion: Deism

→ His Personality Micah is a visionary and natural born leader. He is seemingly stern, hardworking, and higher ranked among the SCOOBY team. Outside of his team he plays the role of moral compass, protector, provider, teacher, coach, and playmate. Micah has a confident demeanor, often keeping his cool when tested, and is considered one of the well known multitaskers within the pack. Everyone is different and he knows that. Micah is great at finding and respecting people's values and opinions within their pack, the supernatural community and humans; as long as they don’t harm the family/pack or anyone else. He’s one of the few pack members that enjoys spending time with everyone. Taking the younger members out to the mall or movies, attending important performances and games. He also volunteers to help with homework when he’s not on duty. With the older pack members, Micah is always available to lend a helping hand or ear, be supportive and lead by example.

Because of his own history, Micah has shown a sympathetic view toward those like him, who seek refuge from other packs. Micah has taken it upon himself to greet newcomers and personally make them feel welcomed. He cares deeply about others and is bothered greatly when he can't save people or hurts people by accident to the point that he even has nightmares about it. His nightmares are usually about him taking over packs and forcing them to choose to join him or die. He has shown a capacity for self-sacrifice and because of his desire to protect his loved ones, he can show a ruthless side to himself at times. Micah’s protective instincts are in fact, so strong that he will retaliate or turn against anyone if they have hurt someone he cares about.

→ His Personal Facts

Occupation: Full Time Head of SCOOBY

Scars: A few scar from escaping torture

Tattoos: None

Two Likes: Date Nights and Martial Arts/Judo

Two Dislikes: Coconut Water and Botany

Two Fears: Outer Space and Incurable Illnesses

Two Hobbies: Carpentry and Jigsaw Puzzles

Three Positive Traits: Brave, Conscientious, Active

Three Negative Traits: Malicious, Negativistic, Oppressed

→ His Connections

Parent Names:

Akemi Toll (Mother): Jalissa reminds Micha a lot of his mother. She was the caretaker of their pack and looked after the youngins. Akemi always wanted a house full of children but it never happened. Micah is sure she would have adored her grandbabies and his new pack.

Munni ‘Michael’ Toll (Father): Micah's father died during the infiltration of his old pack. His father was his mentor and best friend. He was able to discuss everything with his father.

Sibling Names:

Ambrocio ‘Ambros’ Toll (Brother): Ambros died at a young age. Micah does remember much about his little brother but he’s sure Ambros did not live to make it to grade school. His parents never talked about it either.

Children Names:

Kya Toll (Daughter): Kya was a surprise to Micah. She was a serious baby that reminded him of typical first born alpha children. Kya changed a lot from the serious, unsmiling baby, to an intelligent 8 year old shadow of her mother.

Lila Toll (Daughter): Lila was the polar opposite of her older sister. She came out with a blowing cry and swing arms. Now 4 years old,  she still keeps him on his toes. He has lost her on more than one occasion within the pack house because of her constant wondering and independent tendencies.

Noah Toll (Son): Micah was relieved when he and Jalissa found out that their newest addition would be a boy. He loves his daughters but his son has a special place in his heart. Noah is just 6 months and has excelled in his motor skills. The best part of Micah day is introducing his son to solid foods.

Romantic Connections:

Jalissa Toll (Wife): Jalissa is his wife, best friend and mate. He harbored feelings for her since he first walked through the door of the pack and saw her. Micah finds the specific details of first meeting Jalissa fuzy. He can remember the smell of his mother cooking human flesh or his father's homemade aftershave but he cannot for the life of him recall the initial smell of Jalissa when they first meet.

Platonic Connections:

Hanna Moore (Co-Worker): Hanna is a sweet girl that Micah is slowly but surely getting close to. She gets the job done and Micah is proud of having her as his second. Her curiosity is the only thing keeping him from calling her a friend.

Duke Thornton (Acquaintance): Micah has spoken to Duke on multiple occasions. He once feared the coldness in his eyes but they talked and set boundaries, Duke wasn’t as bad as others made him out to be. Micah is one of his secret keepers.

Louis Martin-Rovet (Friend): Louis and Micah bonded over finding and comparing information about Duke. Now they work closely together to keep the information out of the hands of the supernatural community including their pack.

Ray Hamelin (Good Friend): At first, Micah was sure Ray was hovering over him when he first joined the pack. He quickly learned that it was the youngest Hamelin personality. Ray reminds Micah deeply of home and he respects the relationship the man has with his older brother, Nick; one he was never allowed to have with his own younger brother, Ambros.

Isaac Owens (Friend): Micah was there when Isaac first took over the wolf pack. He was surprised when the new alpha asked him for a copy of the information he had on the pack for his own reference. Over the years they’ve built a solid friendship that doesn’t affect either of their work.

Hostile Connections:

Alan Thomas (Dislike): Alan went after one of Micah’s trainees during a rampage. It is one of the only times Micah has ever lost his cool and one of the only times he’s allowed retaliation against the wolves.

Noel Crais (Grudge): Noel laid down the trap that broke Jalissa’s tail. Jalissa got over it, seeing it as a part of the job, but Micah still resents her.

Pets:

None

→ History Micah was born to the rat pack of Sacramento in the late 1930s. He spent most of his childhood being raised to become Alpha, and take over from his father. His family had great ambition, and conquered most of California, with Micah and the other spies leading the charge. They would infiltrate, and then attack, taking out the higher pack structure and forcing everyone else to pledge allegiance or perish. By 1965 they’d taken over all of California and had taken up major roles in Nevada, Washington, and Colorado. Instead of continuing their trail from the West to the East, Micah suggested they hit Chicago and have a central base to expand from. He went alone and began surveillance on the pack. He was quick to befriend the higher ups, including Nick, Ray, Jim, Mills, and Jalissa. About 4 months in they cornered him with the truth. Ray had investigated his claims of being the only survivor and found out the truth. They tortured him for the information of the infrastructure and map of packs they had taken over. Once they had gotten everything they needed from him, they brought in a witch from New York who erased, and modified his old memories, and fabricated ones that made his story of being a survivor real. While he recovered they went and destroyed all aspects of his past life: killed every member of a pack who pledged allegiance to the Tolls and threatened any neighboring packs to keep their memories of the Tolls silent.

Micah Toll was born to a small pack outside of Las Vegas in the late 30s. Las Vegas had yet to become a monolith and was only populated by the rats, wolves, and heavies. He spent most of his youth on the up and coming Strip, learning how to distinguish supernatural species from one another. As more species moved in, it became very apparent to him and his pack that each required a unique strategy to be dealt with. Micah took a special interest in the wolves, who tended to act rowdy and disruptive in the casinos and clubs where he acted as an enforcer for the pack. He quickly gained a reputation for his skills with guns and interrogation. In the mid-60s, a rat came in and got chummy with his alpha. 6 months later everyone was dead from the infiltrating pack and Micah was covered in marks from their torture. He made a run for it and somehow got away. He got to Chicago and asked for refuge and was taken into the pack.

After settling in, Micah started getting close to Jalissa. She took it upon herself to introduce him to everyone and help him get comfortable with the way they ran things. Micah fell for her kindness, humor, and the way she tried to relate to everyone. It took a few months, but he eventually asked her out. They dated for a few years, and then eventually mated. In this time he got to know the rest of the pack, especially Jalissa's close friends; Nick, Ray, Jim, and Mills. He and Nick began talking about his past experience with the wolves in Vegas, and how he spearheaded his old pack’s procedures with dealing with species. Nick brought him into the fold, and had him create HOWL, or SCOOBY as it is known now.

→ The Present

Many people call Micah the pack dad. He’s not sure if it's in reference to Jalissa being pack mom or the fact that they’re the only couple with three children in their pack. However, he does often take care of the younger members of the pack. Since Nick and Ray are both banned from PTA meetings, Micah attends regularly. He and Jalissa are the emergency contacts for all the children and teenagers in school. Micah really pushes for a lot of human “normality” for his family because he feels a part of him is missing, but doesn’t know how to fill it. He knows he lost his pack and wonders if this is the source of the missing feeling. He worries that he’s probably trying too hard to fill those gaps with his current pack and family. A few members have suggested for him to go see the local supernatural psychiatrist but he is unsure.

Micah knows there’s a lot of ‘need to know’ information within the pack and he is sure he holds one of the most unbelievable ‘need to know’ intel. Nick, Mills, Conrad, Ray, Louis and himself know the truth about Duke Thornton’s origins. Duke was a warlock with the Cleirigh mark cursed and changed into a wolf animal shifter. After a failed ritual to change Duke back that led to a supernatural catastrophe, the council placed everything on a need to know basis for the safety of everyone, including hunters. Nick shared the information with those affected by the information; Mills as pack second, Conrad as pack third, Ray as the pack liaison, Louis as the head of GOLD, and himself as the head of SCOOBY. Recently, Hanna has been curious about how he handles the information on Duke. He knows she’ll try to get to the bottom of it and is unsure what Nick’s response will be to her finding out but also him being unable to control his second. He’s currently unsure of what to do and has expressed his concerns to his trusted friends, Louis and Ray.

→ Available Gif Hunts (we do not own these)

John Cho (Micah Toll) [1][2][3][4]