#they thrive off of that shit like it's their life force and it's genuinely

[iwaasfairy]

Fairy, I’m so fucked. I’m in this weird fwb situationship with my cousin not cousin’s best friend’s best friend. He’s such a bum too its like straight out of a dark fanfic 😭 I actually want him whyyyyy???? He’s broke, jobless, and has his head stuck so far into FFXIV you’d have to fish him out just to ask him what’s up. I’m so out of his league too and he doesn’t even like me!! Half the time I’m not sure why he can’t just watch porn to get off but wants my pictures. I’m simultaneously grossed out knowing what he’s doing but also attached to this because it’s the only time he really gives me time of day. I want to drop him but I also can’t bring myself to. Talk some sense into me please. I feel annoying texting him so much when he really doesn’t care.

giRL YOU BETTER FUckIN STOP IT do not tell me this musty dusty crusty gross uggo man who's neet-ness is currently oozing out through my screen has you wrapped around his finger(s). that's honestly embarrassing for you bABE likE COME ON NOW. you knOW YOURE wAY OUT OF HIS LEAGUE AND YOU'RE STILL THERE FOR WHAT REASON???? does he make you feel pretty? no. does he make you feel important? no. does he do anything except beat his meat to anything he can get his gross unwashed hands on from you? no.

you best fuckin kick that man to the curb before the day is over giRL lIKE COME ONNNN,,, love yourself. i love you. i know you're sexy as fuck. this man has nothing on you

[green-alien-turdz]

What are your headcanons for the main five, if you dont mind answering. I really like your take on all of them (Especially Kyle!!) and id love to hear more of your takes on them, aside from what you include in your art.

I'm curious as to which headcanons you're really interested in, but I will do my best to try and cover as much ground as possible.

Keep in mind that this is all teen headcanon's (so like 17-18)

STAN: Doing his best to not fall apart at any moment. Home life is still pretty ass and Randy is a dickwad like always. Sharon is a good constant in his life, and she's become much more lenient with him over the years, knowing that he's got a lot of shit on his plate. Is still in Crimson Dawn because it helps him vent his frustrations. Worked rather hard to not be an alcoholic, but doesn't turn down drinking with Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny. Genuinely making an effort to try and take care of himself and trying to get Kyle to do the same. He is also going to be narrowly graduating by the skin his teeth with help from Wendy (who is simply a friend), and Kyle. He also became much more into protest groups, but to the dismay of his friends who are forced to watch hundreds of documentaries and listen to him read articles. (The intensity of this passion came from trying to find a purpose in life when he was at his worst, mentally.)

/\ Both like one another but have no clue where to go from there \/

KYLE: In desperate need of anger management classes. The pressure of always trying to be perfect and excel at everything caught up with him in about 6th grade, where he'd start trying to control every aspect of his life in the worst ways possible. Sheila and Gerald are completely blind to any of this, seeing as the grades never dropped, so they assume all is well. Despite that, he does still preach about self-care and the importance of letting out "pussy emotions" to the rest of his friends, who are all well aware of his issues (sh + ed) but aren't sure how to fix them. He is also Crimson Dawn's biggest supporter and is usually wearing the same shirt because he finds comfort in it.

CARTMAN: Thriving in his own sense. He still has an insane amount of unwarranted confidence, but he does still have some insecurities (the narcissism often cancels it out though). He has become more barrable with age, but that's not saying much. Somehow, he still can't grasp why no one outside of his friend group even likes talking with him. Has a thing for Wendy again, but it's very on again and off again between the two, seeing as Wendy will usually get bothered by him and then dip. Genuinely does care for his friends (in his own way), but masks it with insults and fighting. May or may not purposefully drive away all of his mom's boyfriends, afraid of losing her care and attention. - EXTRA: Worked at the sewerslide hotline as a joke for about a week before getting fired -

KENNY: Can't take a single thing seriously because if he does, it'll break him. Takes pride in being the most comedic person in the room, always trying to one up the next guy, typically with gross out humour. Spends most of his time away from home, unless it's to take care of Karen, but he often takes her out with him, even to his jobs. He still works at City Wok, but also picks up other odd jobs around town. Stan will also give him a shit ton of Randy's supply to sell around to minors as a way to get some extra cash. Similar to Stan, he's not doing so great school wise, seeing as he spends so much time working, and would rather be with friends in his free time, but Kyle also helps him to make sure that he's going to graduate. When it comes to his friendship with Marjorine/Butters, he's the main supporter, doing what he can to help out. -EXTRA: While he doesn't have time very often to do so, he does try and go out as Mysterion when possible)

BUTTERS/MARJORINE: Get this bitch out of her household now. After many years of uncomfortable confusion, finally came to the conclusion that being Marjorine was what she wanted. Despite an unaccepting homelife, she is very openly feminine once out in public, getting dressed into clothes she likes in public restrooms. Going to graze over the home abu$e we know occurs. She mainly hangs out with Kenny and everyone else when she can but spends a lot of time grounded. Getting a job at the mall has helped with being able to get some time to be herself. She also really enjoys being the guitarist in Crimson Dawn and is one of the few times she'll actually let negative emotions out. Although there is still the occasional outing as Professor Chaos.

As a whole, they're all still dickwads who love going around town and fucking shit up. They are NOT well liked because they're so obnoxious, and they're very likely going to be the ones behind random destruction and vandalism. They still love scheming and ruining the lives of others, but try to be less open about it as to avoid getting in trouble with the law as an adult.

(If you have any specific headcanon's you were looking for, feel free to send an ask! I'm not sure what it was you were looking for, so please let me know if I missed anything you were curious about.)

[pekuliar]

HC for Reigen, his sibling, and his childhood

Reigen having a sibling is a pretty common HC!! Most headcanons with Reigen’s older sister/Reigen having a sibling portray the sibling as the “good kid”/“golden child” compared to his loser ass, but mostly based on…….projection from my own childhood……. I’d like to think it’s the opposite. IMO, Reigen was the “good kid” while his sibling was the one who Reigen’s parents probably worried about more

I think it’s quite a common hc too that Reigen’s parents were strict/emotionally neglectful/had unrealistic expectations of their kids, which I totally agree with. Now, here’s some projection and traumadumping to illustrate how children with these parents might grow —

There are a couple ways children survive living with overbearing/strict parents — by running themselves ragged trying to please them, or by accepting the frequent arguments/groundings/bans as part of life. I think Reigen (as I did) chose the former, and his sibling (as my sibling did) chose the latter.

My childhood went something like this: I was seen as the “unproblematic child” with a tendency to be a fast learner wherever it counted. I thrived off being good at things, and being told I was good at things. Classic “you can do anything you set your mind to” child. I wasn’t perfect by far; I just developed a sixth sense for getting away with things — lying, “reading” my parents, finding loopholes, scheduling “coincidences”, and a healthy amount of crying to guilt-trip my teachers.

My sibling, on the other hand, was the opposite — they skipped school, never cared to find any extracurricular clubs, and were always at odds with my parents. They made friends quick though; where I tended to only befriend people I was in the same class/club with, my sibling somehow always had a web of friends spanning multiple schools. Crucially, despite how often they fought with my parents, my sibling almost never lied, instead choosing to go “Yeah, I did that. So what?”, accepting the ensuing arguments.

Because of that, we grew very differently. My sibling is so much more open and sociable, hating environments where he’s made to act more “formal”/“professional”, figuring out early on that you don’t actually need to continually convince people that you matter. On the other hand, I think I’ve habitually covered up any single iota of genuineness inside me. I’m great at making first impressions but bad at actually connecting; I can’t cope with not being busy 100% of the time; I keep obsessively finding new skills to pick up because idk what else I can do. I also don’t have any good coping mechanisms for failure and rejection because, well, why would a “gifted kid” need to learn how to deal with being bad at things?* [*: sarcasm]

Does all this sound familiar?

So yes anyway. I think Reigen is Reigen because he was always good at pleasing his parents/teachers using a combination of deception/manipulation and actually being good at things, and was unable to accept failure/rejection because he’d always found a way to avoid it. And as a result of being unable to accept any outcome below the ideal, he would’ve gotten less and less honest about his own genuine emotions, eventually becoming great at presenting an “impressive” front but terrible at actually genuinely connecting with people.

And so in conclusion — LET CHILDREN BE SHIT AT THINGS. LET CHILDREN SUCK AT SCHOOLWORK/SPORTS/ETC. Literally no one was created to be perfect at everything. Allowing children to fail in a supportive environment doesn’t encourage them to “”underperform””; it makes them so much better at accepting failure and moving forward from it in a safe and non-self-destructive way. Also, forcing kids to be perfect doesn’t make them perfect — it just makes them damn good liars. Idk why this is becoming a parenting PSA from me, a single 24-year-old, but please just. Let children be shit.

[brolantra]

Nah deadass man nothing pisses me off more than performative spirituality… performative healing… performative growth… performative anything really. I can understand wanting to feel like you’re apart of something bigger than yourself, but be so fucking fr. Like people can fool themselves all they want but from the outside looking in, nigga we can see you.

People used to try to say I gatekeep spirituality and you know what I ABSOLUTELY DO. Cuz this shit is nothing to play with. It’s not even like I’m tryna gatekeep just to gatekeep.. I be caring about peoples souls. And a lot of people are playing with energies they do not have the power or control to deal with. Cuz they’re not authentic. They’re not genuine. And they are leaving themselves susceptible to lower level beings that thrive off of lies and delusion. Lower level beings that find their way in through low vibrations.

Spirituality can be very beautiful, it saved my life if I’m being real. But people are reckless in these spiritual streets. They don’t do any type of studying. They’re not following protocol. They use spirituality to decorate their ego. And they use spirituality to ignore the fact that they are actually shitty human beings.

Keep playing with this shit if you want to. You are literally gambling with your life & your life force. I’m not new to this, I know exactly what I’m talking about, I’ve seen first hand what happens when someone parades around like they’re spiritual and connected but ain’t connected to shit but their own ego.

You don’t have to believe me. But keep using this shit as a mask if you want to. It will be your undoing.

[incarnateirony]

I do find it funny how few, very very few, people ever truly understood Zenthus. Maybe players back in the original campaigns circa early 2000s until about 2007, that watched him as he became who he was, but the following 15 years was a mix of people just not finding the right answers, or making the right builds, or looking for the right things, or just goddamn not listening.

I ironically ran into it with of all things another GM, because he plays "god" but got ultimately fucking rickrolled without even trying, no spells ever fired, nothing. And then I got "uwuwuuwuwuw Zento was such a manipulator"

I mean, dude, he already turned down one object you offered him you shouldn't. Whether that was pure goodness of intent or paranoia of getting bound by another ring is up to interpretation, but he didn't have to sit there playing shinto priest giving God some fucking therapy on how not to be a shitty person while clarifying the exact nature of his entrapment. You knew he has internal issues of being compelled, you know what he deals with. You brought him in even when he directly disadvised it to your face, and then quite literally handed your supposed "friend's" entire blueprint to the orphic egg they're surviving in, in chaos, with a casual question just because you felt the most moderate pressure from his kid attacking you. That, or you were a lot more put out and scared than letting on of those attacks, cuz, "The blueprints, do you have them?" HERE YOU GO, AND YOUR GIFTED WORLDS WORST DAD MUG

Continued conversation. He is LITERALLY advising god, entirely truthfully, on how to fight his son. Like yes, we raised Kion, this is how he thinks, because this is what we would do, stop impulse reacting, he is doing everything he can to make you react. We literally thrive on making you impulse react and start slipping up. Stop being so confident he's acting from incompetence either, three times in the last two minutes you declared something only to get hit remotely in the godly face to the point of verbal surprise or impress. Stop it. He's targeting your creation because you're hiding, not because he thinks you're there. And he will continue to target your creation until you do something about it.

But the further he got advised on the situation the more freaked god* got and deadass like killed himself to remove himself from the cycle to stop perpetuating this bullshit that set Kion off to begin with and Zento just walks out with everything.

Like. that wasn't even manipulation dude, he was entirely honest with you top to bottom, and even stopped you from the suicide route earlier but when you decided to do it again it's like, fine whatever, okay, genuinely makes my life easier, do you, and he did.

Zento is *dangerous* but he is not, actually, actively manipulative. *Zenthus* is even extremely honest, though that personality IS manipulative. But Zenthus can jack Zento, and you said you understood when the change happened so like. no dude that's just loose lips sink cosmic ships. Zenthus crawling out to yoink the map should be none surprise, Zento even warned you three times three different ways.

That doesn't mean Shea had the right idea either to like, love him better. That also doesn't work, Zenthus still has too much unadulterated control when he wants. Or trying to force my hand into some easy slay arrangement of the bad half for reasons like, no. No we aint doin this.

God's player often talked about God's Cry For Help but would rather be uwu Zento is manipulator because i did a bad than realize, Zenthus' entire existence is Zento's 20+ RL year cry for help nobody's ever card enough about to figure out how to answer, and everyone gets too pissed at Zenthus to address, and everyone loses their shit and doesn't know how to fix it. These folks now aren't even pulling punches, fuck breaking his phyllactery, they're facing his full true self and all his parts and memories and forms and sublords like Zom and Ex head on and tactically, flushing out the pain and insanity driving not just him but compelling men beneath the surface for ages.

And damn has Noiz observed a lot. Like. Khyla actually sat and talked with Zento while everyone talked of him as the irredeemable asshat, which isn't true unto itself. Just like morning tea with a quiet sage with a strange sense of humor before realizing, "oh my god, this guy is playing cat and mouse with his own knowledge and himself".

Len has sat in the serpent's lair more than once now, and even gotten Zento's attention in strange ways, even if mostly through Zenthus masque. Sesh has absolutely broken down what's screwing his kid up so bad to keep everyone straight.

like noiz even learned the speech patterns for them with a QUICKNESS. Like. Nono Zento is the weeb part because he's an eastern dragon, but also has strange leaks of genuine habits, like "Ehhhh" in thought, and other drawls. Zenthus does not allow that staggering, and retains VERY little of Zento's far east influence beyond sort of kidnapping a reflection of him for figure. A few of the speech ticks like "ne/yes?" remain, mostly because elvish mimics that and was recent history. And sometimes they really are in concert together, and that itself has an identifiable tone, as does the Void compelling him at times, or at least the behaviors that rise from him. Noiz broke that shit DOWN. But does not understand how RARE that is.

The GM had even missed it and he knew me for almost the whole damn time. "Oh Zenthus hides Zento well" no the fuck he doesn't, he changes between voice, dialect, tone, has even told you "I have a gnat of my own (in my head)", has switched between addressing his own takes like "It's funny you would say mortals would think that. He DID." about--himself? Bro he aint hiding shit. He tells you again and again and nobody listens to how he communicates even when he literally sits down and has a 2 hour talk advising god, god just. ok i'm die now. He is literally walking around holding a stick with his two halves in front of everyone all the goddamn time what the fuck are you talking about hides Zento well. Noiz had a character talk to him for like 5 minutes and fucking picked it up, why do normal people suck at this

No. he needs to be let go, but he needs to be replaced first. But people need to make sure when he's replaced, Zenthus doesn't hitch a ride on the new vessel. Mythology reasons make it Real Fuckin Bad to delete Zento without a backup plan so it's time to think. and damn noiz been thinking

bro, mads buddy, I love you, but I don't want to hear about God's Unheard Cry For Help While He Openly Insults The People Reaching To Him Or Even Makes Their Lives Worse The Three Times Anyone Tried, in a new plot thread, when this guy has been wearing his shit on his sleeve for ages and nobody listens. He told YOU and you did jack schitt, and even failed to inform your supposed friend you sold out the blueprints of about the fact that you know, you need to have something to replace Zenthus' function if you want reality to be able to observe itself. Do they have one? Yes. It would have been nice for god to tell them that before seppuku, but whatever. Zento's been begging to be heard for almost a quarter century in real life and finally one motherfucker got set on fixing it hell or high water because the player fell in love with Zenthus' son as their favorite blorbo and He Must Be Saved. But not like my ex wife's hackass romance, no. I'm talking busting ass, complex character sheets, math, large scale tactics on orders of operations to neuter him and so on. Your super great god had every chance to listen to someone ELSE'S cry for help and save his own friend but you deuced out under moderate pressure and embarrassment. So yeah I don't wanna hear about babygod's cry for help of his own self entrapment lmaoooo

[fllagellant]

also 2, 13, 27, & 47 for urien please 👁️🤌

my big frankenboy... 8 foot legend 2. How does your Shepard feel about having a yeoman assigned to them in 2? And in 3?

Urien has... a lot of feelings about Kelly. None of them good. Since Cerberus fumbled his resurrection- no fault of Miranda, the sabotage of the station destroyed 'his' body and forced him into a back up that wasn't exactly made to live in- Kelly being ever present and forcefully cheery felt wrong. She tried to be a friend, a therapist, a co-worker, a diary, all at once. She would try and gossip with him, then would question him about his hallucinations and if he wants her to contact TIM to see if he'll send over meds he can be put on. She treated him like she had to be everything for him, like he had to relearn living. He was already struggling with dying and waking up in a body that semi-resembled who he is but still wasn't him, only to been constantly harassed by a yeoman who refused to understand him or his boundaries. He couldn't talk on any meaningful level with her, knowing TIM would get reports about what he would say and use it against him. She wasn't there to help him. She didn't treat him like a person. She saw him as a project. With Traynor, it was different. Very different. She saw him as a person. Yes, she did say "I thought the height thing was a rumour, Commander!" when she first saw him, but that wasn't a crime. Seeing any human that size was a shock, no matter what. But she didn't behave like she was always his friend. She wasn't reporting every little thing about him to someone else. They bonded naturally over chess, they talked like normal people. There was no forceful joy or trying to wring answers out of Urien, it was just learning each other as friends. She was also just more pleasant to be around, always throwing small-talk around when telling him about messages or telling him if someone wants to talk to him. They clicked, neither of them forced their way into the others life. She was invited up to his cabin for chess nights or just to talk, Kelly was never given that honour. Samantha Traynor is a friend. Kelly Chambers is a Cerberus Agent. And that how he'll always see it. 13. How does your Shep react to teasing/ribbing? Urien thrives on it. Genuinely. Even during ME2, when he was extremely fragile, having Zaeed poke fun at his shit aim made him feel alive. It fuels him, pushing him to do more. Being raised by Alliance Sergents and Soldiers, professionalism was crammed down his throat. Mouthing off became a crime, he couldn't jab at anyone unless he wanted to risk a punishment later. So those urges just build up inside of him. When he gets on the Normandy, he uses that advantage to start teasing everyone around him. It just how he talks, how he pushes people around him. He flirts by teasing, he insults by teasing, he makes friends by teasing. He loves hearing it from other people. From teasing about armour to ribbing about his gun mods. Poking fun at his fashion sense to making fun of his dancing. It just pushes him to do more, but not from anger or anything like that. It's the truest form of motivation for him. It's also the quickest way to become friends with him. He just loves it. 27. Do they have any pet peeves?

Unsolicited advice. This is another reason he dislikes Kelly. It's not like teasing, when you tease you don't tell people what to do, it's always weirdly serious and it feels like it's devaluing his own opinions. When someone, without asking if he wants help, starts to tell him what he needs to do and how to do it and where to go, he feels devalued. He feels disrespected. He had to deal with constant unsolicited criticism and advice growing up, no one taking into consideration how he might want to do something or what path he wanted to follow. He's an adult, he wants to be treated like one. He has his way of living, he isn't going to adapt to how someone wants to see him live. 47. Does Shepard practice any kind of self-care? He picked up baking in house arrest, following a strict recipe and having the same result every time was nice. It was a welcomed departure from the unknown, from having to make everything up on the spot and figure it out from there. It let him focus on something simple, let him work out the stress of the day through making the dough and then allowed him to relax with the fruits of his labour. He takes up painting postwar, sometimes it's portraits but its usually just him following his instincts. Whatever his heart says, he'll put on the canvas. He loves making abstract art, art that's from his feelings. It helps him process current and past events.

[zombies-aliens]

It's a quiet time right now. I want to say I love everyone who has never wronged me and genuinely wants to help me and see me thrive and be true with me. I have a lot of appreciation whoever they are. It sucks I can never truly truly know who those people actually are, but they're there. I hope my issues don't get in the way of any blessings in my life whether it's material blessings or physical blessings - blessings of any kind. All blessings. In all forms. Simple blessings and complex ones. In every size big or small, the ones that are easy to see and hard to notice. I appreciate all the real ones all the kind hearts who take no shit from others. You guys inspire me I'm tryna be like yall. I pray evil will never reach me, I know there's an evil within me, that it never reaches my personality and perverts it. I think in some ways it has. I believe everyone has an inner evil we got to keep ourselves away from. It's the bad thoughts, the violent ones, the ones that tell us to go off on someone who slighted us. I believe in second chances, but also to have the freedom to choose not to give them out and even the freedom to not always take the second chance when it's given to us for whatever reason. In the end life goes on. We'll experience happiness again as a common feeling. But that's all it is a feeling. And goes around and comes around. Sometimes I think happiness is like an energy force that's abundant but there isn't enough for everyone to experience at the same moment which is why the world has never had world peace before, but it does get around to everybody. It won't get to visit of us in time sadly and I think this is when it's crucial to journal your thoughts, exercise and take care of yourself and find a place to experience those quiet moments. And that's exactly what I'm feeling right now a quiet moment because happiness isn't visiting me today but it did yesterday. I'm grateful for it, and ultimately I'm grateful for God because He created everything. And theres a lot of questions people have about God, like why there's kids born with cancer. Its beyond me. I definitely will get to that question if I'm lucky enough to meet Him and speak to Him. Either way I'm still gonna choose to believe in my creator and nothing will ever change it, nobody can change my faith. I don't force it on anybody. Some Christians are crazy but not me. If you don't want to believe that's perfectly fine. Obviously I'd like you to, but we aren't suppose to force it on anyone. Especially fear mongering telling non believers they're gonna go to hell. Yeah.. that'll get them to believe. That's about all i have to say right now. Currently vibing to some music by d savage listening to Dont U Change.

[hollowflay]

𝗜𝗧’𝗦 𝗔 𝗖𝗥𝗨𝗘𝗟 , 𝗖𝗥𝗨𝗘𝗟 𝗦𝗨𝗠𝗠𝗘𝗥 . This is  an  rp  blog  for 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐀𝐘 formerly  of  𝑆𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑟  𝑇ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠  and  now  flung  into  whatever  hellhole  i’ve  cast  her  into as an ORIGINAL CHARACTER . verses  in  progress  .

HEAVILY LINKED LOREWISE WITH MY PERSONAL BILLY (  @mtvatlas​  )

➤ 𝐄𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 : Self-Loathing, Internalized Misogyny, Aggression as Defense, Determination To Thrive, Pyrrhic Victory, The Thing We Do To Survive, The Power of Music, Being Taken Over By Something Bigger That You Cannot Understand, The Unwanted Daughter, Being Treated Like An Ornament, The Dog Bites Back, Bad Guy Gets Their Just Desserts, Popular Girls, Queen Bee Behavior, Good Is Not Nice.

IMPORTANT LINKS

carrd  | memes | meta | headcanons | pinterest | playlist

Cheer Squad: @cunninghamtm​ , @mhunster​ , @cliqbaits​

IMPORTANT INFO

HEATHER FUCKING SUCKS — Heather has historically been a classic mean girl. She’s Heather Chandler but a brunette. She SUCKS. She’s the kinda of person who insults you “as a joke” then says you’re being “too sensitive” when you call her out on it. She’s entitled and petty and mean spirited. She also makes a lot of sex jokes n shit. Naturally post season 3 she um, has a bit of a change of heart but she’s still kinda of a bitch. Just you know, more of a lovable one.

HEATHER DOESN’T DATE — Or at least she has not historically. While Heather isn’t “naturally aroace” for lack of a better phrasing she is very sex/romance adverse at this point in her life. She spent her tween years watching her older sister be torn apart by an abusive relationship that no one helped her escape and in fact supported at times and the majority of her social group since like, middle school have been untrustworthy as per popular mean girl traditions. She also barely escaped the worst of a grooming situation with her piano teacher in middle school. So the emotional/physical vulnerability of romance, sex and even just genuine platonic interaction can be very scary to her. She will mask it with aggression and making it seem like no one in Hawkins is good enough for her but she distinctly avoids romantic situations and reacts EXTREMELY negatively to them.

Characters are welcome to assume she’s doing all the normal teen stuff they are or believe whatever rumors about her getting with someone that are flying around ( bc you know they exist ) but that’s gonna be a misconception on their end. How much people notice of this behavior is really up to you and how close/perceptive they are. This doesn’t mean shipping is off the table for her, just that it’ll require more than the usual amount of plotting and time to get there. She’s shipping nightmare mode and slow burn only.

Heather and Billy are Kind of A Hivemind — this really only applies to my depiction of Heather in conjunction with my depiction of Billy ( @mtvatlas​ ) for the sake of other people’s vibes. But the idea here is that they survived the flaying because once the gate was shut the secondary nervous system or whatever the Mindflayer was using to control them went dormant which freed them from its control. They’re only a hivemind, like all the flayed are to an extent, when the gate is open/the MF/Vecna is Up To Something. If other’s are interested in playing around with this idea in our rp that’s cool! I’m not just forcing it on any Billys/Flayed folks or anything like that.

[happymediumclub]

In Defense of Spreading Holiday Cheer Fear

Low-stakes ways to feed your inner villain during the happiest time of the year

By Happy Medium Club’s resident Scorpio, Samirah 

Before you @me, you should know that I actually love the holidays.

I thrive in busy, high-stress seasons of life, and usually appreciate the chaos that inevitably comes from spending too much quality time with family and friends. But here’s what I do hate about the holidays: the cultural obsession with being “nice.”

This time of the year and the expectations that come with it are difficult for me for many reasons.

a) mental illness

b) stress-induced tension in my interpersonal relationships (a byproduct of your mental illness)

c) resulting feelings of self-hate that I usually can’t shake until a priest draws those little black ash marks on my forehead (iykyk)

Don’t worry—I’m fine!

I’m not a mean person. Neither year-round nor seasonally. I just personally find it hard to be nice all the time. I can’t possibly be the only one, right?

I feel like that’s a totally fine thing to admit about yourself?

All that to say, after many years of practice, I’ve fine-tuned a very emotionally immature way to help myself survive this time of year the best I can.

You can call it being a Scrooge or a Grinch, or maybe just a capital “B” (put some respect on it!) B*tch. I like to think of it more like microdosing meanness. It’s a tried-and-true (by me only) method, totally not backed by science. It’s a way of helping me cope with the pressure to be endlessly kind during the holidays.

Like microdosing herbs, psychedelics, or prescription medications, the idea is that low doses of unkindness help boost my overall mood and promote emotional balance. In layman’s terms, I just sprinkly dinkly a little bit of meanie weenie here and there.

Before I pass along my wisdom to you, let me again reinforce that this method is not backed by scientists, doctors, or blessed by any sort of mental health expert.

Nonetheless, here are four easy ways to microdose meanness during the holidays.

These tactics (probably!) won’t get you disinvited from Christmas dinner next year. Good luck!

1. Get Drunk & Say Mean Sh*T

Let’s start with the simplest one that even the most genuinely nice person can easily execute. Actually, this one works best the nicer you are! I’ll caveat that this one actually does NOT work if you are either a) too mean or b) too frequently drunk. 

All you have to do is have a little bit too much spiked dairy-free egg nog and then let ‘er rip. I like to add a playful little “just kidding” at the end to take the edge off for both yourself and the victim. This beautiful touch was inspired by my mother-in-law. Now, this isn’t a tactic you can overuse, but do feel free to dip your toe in with different groups and see how she feels!

2. Drive a Wedge

Not going to lie, this one takes a bit more scheming, so it’s not for the faint of heart. However, it does do double duty for those of us with certain compulsions by occupying more mind space. This one is especially for those of us who tire of caving on our own plans for the holidays in order to appease others. Have a controlling family member who is never happy unless things happen exactly the way they want? Let’s take them the f*ck down.

Say your mother insists on hosting your family’s Christmas morning brunch at her house year after year, even though all of her children are adults and live in separate homes. You’re tired of waking up early and being forced to wear your old Church clothes— just to only be assigned to bring orange juice for the mimosas.

I’d take a simple 4-step approach.

First, agree graciously.

Second, assume you’re not the only one who is pissed. Start by talking shit to your sister with a new baby. Chances are she agrees, so there’s your first opportunity to plant the seed of resentment.

Then move to the next household. Tell your three adorable young nieces that Santa has been holding back on their gifts because they don’t know where grandma lives, so they’ll cause enough chaos to sufficiently stress your sister and brother-in-law.

All you have to do now is sit back and enjoy the show. Depending on how your family deals with emotion, it will either be a shouting match or a cold war. Either way, call yourself T Swift because you are a friggin Mastermind. 

3. Pick a Punching Bag

Ideally, you’re punching up, but that’s not always possible.

But you can make a deal with a good, understanding friend who takes it like a champ. I’m not saying my friend Dom is a punching bag, but he wants to be! Dom likes the attention. Do I sometimes exploit it? Probably, but I do my best not to.

And in all seriousness, Dom’s ability to be a sturdy, yet vulnerable friend who isn’t afraid of my many emotions is incredibly valuable to me. I call this person a punching bag only for the sake of this article, but as described, it’s obviously not a fair position to put your friends in. However, the idea (the hope) is that this person is willing to look past some of your holiday misfires and give you a safe space to display your hostility. 

Like with any of these, don’t overdo it, and don’t take it for granted. At a minimum, buy your punching bag a Starbucks gift card or a pack of Shiner Cheer for their efforts. 

4. Say Nothing At All 

Just get drunk and go to bed early. To cause maximum chaos, be asleep during key moments. Family game night, last leg of the White Elephant exchange, family photos. You get the idea— be strategic. The best part about this one, for the attention whores, is that people will constantly be asking about you and wondering where you are. Let them talk.

Happy Christmas, Grinchie Winchies!

[reallyromealone]

FORTUNE TELLER 8

Part 7 - current - part 9

Every night (name) woke with nightmares as he clung desperately to himself in the room that was now his with windows and everything though they were one way (name) loved to stare out at any time, he never realized how much he missed outside and just basic things.

He couldn't go outside but that was fine.

He could handle not going outside in exchange for not being drugged and forced to see fortunes.

Naoto got him puzzles without much argument and got (name) into some at home hobbies be could do between his therapy sessions.

Naoto and (name) got along well, the man had a deep hate for his captors and genuinely wanted to see (name) thrive and do better for himself and it made (name) want to cry, He was so used to dealing with shit himself.

They were going to be going through the process of whitness protective services, changing his name and and moving him across the country.

He didn't have any ties to this city social wise, before he was kidnapped he was a recluse who worked online. Naoto was a bit suprised that he didn't have any family he needed to contact or any on his emergency contacts but supposed it would be easier to get him into hiding that way.

(Name) knew Bonten would come looking for him, unable to look in the mirror for long periods of time or be shirtless as the tattoo was a sickening reminder if the months and months of mind games and abuse and they wouldn't give up that easy.

Naoto had told him they would be moving tova safe house soon, outside of this area as Bonten grunts had been seen in this area along with Rindō and Ran.

"I had them bring puzzles and movies, it will be a week or so and then we will be transferring you into whitness protection"

They put a disguise on (name), wig and glasses with contacts and even padding to change his figure a bit, not to mention a uniform to make him look like a cop.

They had someone who looked identical come in and (name) would leave with naoto a half hour later into a police cruiser and off to the safe house.

The haitanis were staking out the house, waiting for the moment to swoop in and after seeing Detective Tachibana and some cop leave they made their entrance but there was no (name) just some guy who looked like.... "Son of a bitch!" Ran seethed as they knocked out the man and left, the two making calls "they fucking tried to pull a fast one on us" he almost laughed and the two began driving in the direction the cruiser went.

Bonten was frantic as they followed the ping of Sanzus GPS, they were so close to getting (name) back and it was driving them mad.

(Name) felt something off as be glanced at the rearview camera and his heart sank "it's them..."

"..shit!" Naoto said as he suddenly took a sharp turn, trying to shake the Bonten men off as he called for backup "this is Naoto Tachibana, I am currently being chased by two vehicles and require back up"

"Back up is on its way" the person on the other side said as Naoto just kept driving and trying to keep the two alive and away from Bonten though that was easier said than done as more black armored SUVs appeared and (name) felt himself panic because god damn it he was so close, he didn't want to go back!

They bolted through the streets of Tokyo, avoiding cars and people and (name) was holding on for dear life and praying to God he didn't get caught by Bonten...he had a really bad fucking feeling what would happen.

He wanted to cry as they avaided the vans and looking back he felt his heart drop as he saw Ran behind the drivers seat of the tailing van and thankfully couldn't see (name)s terrified expression due to the tinted windows.

"(Name), we are going to get away from them" naoto promised as he drove for his life to the closest police station he could get to as the sound of sirens could be heard "just a little longer..." Naoto said until he saw Sanzu pull beside them with a manic grin as he locked eyes with (name) and began driving far to close for their liking.

"Shitshitshit!" Naoto said as they quickly turned into a long alleyway "were going to be going through a park soon, it's the only distraction I have but I want you to jump out when we get to the trees" Naoto said seriously as they made it to the park and Naoto yelled at him to go.

His body moved on its own, barrel rolling out as Naoto drove off and he hid behind a tree in time as the bonten cars barrelled past at a terrifying speed.

"Gotta..gotta go" (name) mumbled with tear stricken eyes, shakily getting up and ditching the disguise he wore and snuck out of the park, now in downtown Shibuya where it was crowded and people would see him if anything happened.

Carefully he nabbed a jacket and hat along with sunglasses at another stall, tentatively he removed his gloves as they were a dead give away but kept them in his pockets in case he would need them.

He looked terrified behind the sunglasses and put up the jackets hood up as he avoided any suspicious people and right now that was everyone and anyone.

He just needed to get the hell out of Tokyo somehow.

Naoto let out a shaky breath when back up came and saved his ass, Bonten backing off when they realized (name) wasn't in the car.

Now he had to find (name).

The house was comprised so (name) definitely wouldn't go there.

Naoto needed a fucking drink as he drove back with his fellow officers to the station, knowing damn well they had people watching them in case (name) showed up.

"Damn it!" Sanzu roared as they met up in a back alley "where the fuck did he go?!"

"Dunno but we have to fucking find him before they do!"

The bonten men were stressed and fuming with rage, a deadly combination.

They just wanted their precious little crystal ball back.

They were fixated on him when they had him but now it was nothing short of obsessed with him.

They weren't willing to part with him under any circumstances.

They just feared having to tell Mikey what had happened.

(Name) didn't know where he was at this point, ending up at an old shrine and decided that this is where he would hide for now.

At least until he was rested.

He had walked for at least two hours, his legs numb.

Hiding behind some rubble (name) rested his head on his knees and took a deep breath, body rattling as he took in everything that just happened.

He was so tired.

He just wanted to be ok.

To be safe.

But that was never an option for him.

Hiding in the darkest corner of the shrine he let himself close his eyes and rest for now.

Later he will continue his trek to the country side, further from Tokyo the better.

[hauntlikeaghost0]

hurricane billy | b.h

billy hargrove x reader

summary: y/n is not used to boys like billy being genuinely nice, so trusts issues and doubt ensues

warnings: kinda angsty on readers part but billy has good intentions. reader is gender neutral though there is use of the word princess so if that makes you uncomfortable i’m sorry.

a/n: i think i hate this but it’s fine

hurricane billy.

that was the only nickname that felt even nearly suitable for the uproar that rolled in along side the blue eyed boy and his camaro. all billy hargrove had to do was step one bootclad foot on the harsh concrete of hawkins high car park and the storm began; giggles echoing from students across the vicinity, with whispers of his skinny skinny jeans and shoulders already being squared by boys across the way, their mere masculinity being threatened at the very sight of the cigeratte butt being stamped out beneath his foot.

for you, however, billy wasn’t something to be gawked at or to compete with, he was just simply trouble. his breed of boy was one not uncommon to hawkins high and one you’d been dealing with your entire life. the classic stereotype of stuck-up, popular boy that thrived off tearing down the people below him only to put himself on a higher pedestal. giving people hope of friendship and parties and loyalty only to kick them to the curb; flirting with the girls only to tell them it was all some sick joke and he would never go for someone like them. two torturous devices you were not unfamiliar with and determined to avoid.

there is not a chance in hell you were going to let yourself get swept up in hurricane billy. at least that is what you’d told yourself that day when billy had arrived.

you now realise what you told yourself had been a lie.

the second billy laid his eyes on you and the only spare seat left in english class you knew you were in for it. the second that shit-eating grin carved itself on to his face as the realisation dawned on yours you knew the gates of hell had just opened up and swallowed you whole. it was doomed from the very first introduction:

“hey baby.” he had drawled out in that deep, honey like voice as he slid into the seat beside you, gaze locked on you’re profile.

you’d seized up immediately, discomfort obvious at the sickly-sweet pet name, maybe even more so at how it made you feel.

“absolutely not.” is all you’d muttered out in response, not meeting his eyes.

he chuckled lazily, but there was a tone of surprise. “what? you don’t like ‘baby’?”

you shook your head definitively.

“what about beautiful? it suits you more” he tries again, kicking his chair back to rest on the table behind him before crossing his feet up on your own. you get a strong urge to shove them off.

“that’s worse”

this time billy definitely is surprised, no one says no to a compliment, let alone one from him.

“how?” the tone of shock is more prominent now, but he still speaks with an air of obvious cockiness, making your skin crawl. “it’s a compliment?”

your heart clenches slightly at the open acknowledgment of the meaningless joke. hating how easy it is for people like him to try an lure people in just for their own entertainment.

“no it’s not.” you snap back, putting a forceful end to the conversation.

however, the stop you thought you’d put on all interactions with billy was swiftly proven false as he sauntered into english class the next day. a toothpick rested between his lips, begrudgingly forcing you to become aware of how soft and pink they looked, as he slid slowly into his seat beside you, running a hand through his hair. you desperately tried to keep your gaze fixed on the chalkboard at the front of the classroom, begging for the lesson to begin before billy got a chance to open his annoyingly pretty mouth.

“hello sweetheart.” he speaks, the words spilling from his mouth straight into the ears of the butterflies causing a hurricane in your stomach.

you clench your fist in annoyance and remind yourself, he doesn’t mean it.

“nope.” is all you say, sternly not wanting to say anything more.

billy huffs in annoyance, knocking his chair back into two legs again. you think you might have shut him up but when you turn to face him there’s still a playful smirk gracing his features.

“princess?” he says with a wink.

at this, you scrunch your face up in disgust, shaking your head rapidly from side to side. it sounds so sickly sweet coming from his mouth you can’t help the overreaction, it’s exactly what you would have expected.

although, you did not expect to hear a gentle laugh coming from the left of you, a smile on billy’s lips as he looks down at your grimace. he switches the toothpick to the other side of his mouth, pearly whites still on full display before he nods down at you and says.

“your cute.”

at this your face falls, deadpan, an anxious feeling pouring into your stomach as a chill runs down your spine at the compliment.

“shut up.” is all you say, before you turn around.

this back and forth continues for weeks. billy comes strolling into english equipped with a new petname, maybe two, which you gladly shut down much to his dismay. at this point it still remains playful, there’s a grin on both your faces and every name still makes you blush despite the fact you so desperately will it not too. you also grow more comfortable with him. on occasion he’ll shout a nickname at you from across the corridor, or as he passes you in the cafeteria and everytime you’ll respond by flipping him the bird or shoving him sharply with your shoulder. he’ll only laugh and shake his head as he struts away.

you even begin having regular conversations as you work in english. sometimes it he’ll just be him asking your for this answers, which you will give him, but not after making him irritated enough to nudge your hand out of the way and copy them himself. other times he’ll ask about your weekend, they’ll be a teasing tone in his voice, like he’s waiting to take the piss, but no matter how boring your weekend is, he’ll always give you his full attention as you tell him about it. he finds himself genuinely enjoying just hearing and watching you talk so much so that sometimes he makes a mistake.

“i like your eyes.” he’ll just blurt out without thinking regret instantly flooding him as he’ll watch, frustrated, as you begin to shut down on him, your entire demeanour changing.

he doesn’t understand why you won’t let him compliment you. most girls giggle and blush and flirt right back but you’re so goddamn stubborn, it drives him mad. the second his first pet name was rejected it only made him want to try harder, make you worship him like the other girls did until, he got to know you. then he began to care for your blunt words, your eyerolls and embarrassed apologies when you realise you’ve been rambling. soon he began to realise it wasn’t about making you bend to him, or feeding his ego, it was about making you believe what he said, making you see what he saw. but still, everytime he tried, you’d shut him out for the rest of the lesson and eventually he decided it wasn’t worth it. if it meant losing your company then he would keep his opinions to himself, or at least try.

but of course, he slips up. it was a thursday afternoon when he finally broke.

he’d accidentally told you he likes your smile within in the last five minutes of your english lesson and before he knew it the bell was ringing and you were packing your things and stalking out of the classroom as fast as possible. it’s baffled him, billy couldn’t understand why you freaked out so much at him simply being nice to you and, having finally had enough of the confusion, he moves quickly into the hallway, watching your figure retreat.

billy is extremely grateful his reputation means the crowds seem to part for him as he moves through the hallways, growing closer and closer to you by the second. he wants to shout, to ask you to stop and explain yourself but he knows his voice will only make you move faster and he’s right on your tail. just as your about the leave the rusted school doors, he reaches you, hand darting out to cautiously grip your arm. in an instant, you turn, affronted, and billy’s confusion only grows when he is struck by that anger radiating off you.

“what?” you snap, the desperation to leave growing stronger by the second.

the shock on billy’s face, shattering his hard exterior briefly almost has you crumbling. it almost has you embracing the butterflies that have been fighting to get loose in your stomach, almost stops you from ignoring the feelings for him that have been swimming beneath the surface. but it doesn’t. you fix your stare. he groans.

“come on.” he says exasperated, grip tightening on your wrist as he pulls you, quickly into a deserted class room. billy shuts the door ands strides over to lean against on of the desks, face stony and hard to read. while you stand where he left you by the door and wait anxiously for him to speak.

“i don’t understand you.” he finally says, raising his sharp blue eyes to meet yours. there’s an anger burning behind them that reminds you steadily what kind of person he is, reinforcing your need to suppress your emotions.

you almost flinch when he speaks again.

“i’m so nice to you,” he starts, sighs and repeats: “i try to be so nice to you. you know i’m not like this with other people, don’t you? you know i’m not like this with anyone but you?”

this makes you scoff, folding your arms steadily across your chest as that all too familiar feeling of discomfort and betrayal begins to rise in you, the ghosts of all the times you’ve believed lies like that and gotten burned.

“are you serious?” you retort, “i hear you shouting nicknames at the girls in the hallways, winking at them until they’re all swooning and feeding your ego just how you want them to!”

now it’s his turn to scoff, letting out a humourless laugh as he rises to stand, gesturing at you pointedly.

“this isn’t about me, it’s about you.” his voice is all frustration. “why won’t you just take my compliments?” billy groans, loudly.

“because i know you don’t mean them!!”

the words are spilling from your lips faster than you can help it. every pent up feeling you’ve ever had for this boy, positive or negative comes bubbling to the surface. alongside all the hurt that’s come from people like him, all the lies and manipulation.

“because almost every compliment i’ve ever received has been the punchline of some asshats cruel fucking joke and i’m sick and tired of getting my hopes up!” you’re yelling but you can’t help it. you’re so tired of getting used, of being humiliated for some narcissistic, popular douchebags enjoyment.

billy almost looks hurt by your words and your wonder if you’ve dispelled his anger. until, realisation dawns on his face and the fury comes back tenfold. “none of what i have said has been a joke.” he states firmly, gaze steady on yours.

“oh yeah” you say, eyebrows raised as you feel your resolve slowly start to break and the tears of anger and pain and maybe even hope start welling in your eyes. “but boys like you don’t just come crashing into this small town and decide to go for people like me! it doesn’t happen. not without their main aim being my humiliation, and i- i refuse to fall for it. not again.”

a tear finally breaks your waterline as you feel the fight leave you completely. you barely register the sounds of billy’s footsteps moving across the classroom until his shoes move into your line of sight which is fixed securely on the floor.

“y/n,” he says, voice stern. “y/n, look at me.”

you hesitate for a few moments, wondering if you’d even be comfortable making eye contact when you’re this close together, before reluctantly raising your chin and meeting his eyes. his expression was not what you expected, there was no taunting grin that told you he was about to burst into laughter and tell you you were right all along; instead there was an emotion swimming behind his eyes that you dared not identify at risk of getting it wrong and getting your hopes up.

“none of what i have said has been a joke.” he spells it out carefully, putting meaning behind each word. he sounds painfully sincere and it makes you stomach clench.

you so badly want to believe him, to tell him how the compliments made your heart race and the nicknames made your cheeks heat; to tell him his smile is breathtaking and his voice makes you shiver. but instead you voice the fear.

“i’m so scared you’ll hurt me.” you mumble out, looking up at him and feeling impossibly small and helpless.

“i want to hurt whoever made you feel like this.” he replies, eyes full of daggers but voice so smooth and comforting. “whoever made you doubt that anyone could see you as anything other than beautiful.” he brushes a strand of hair out of your face so delicately before mumbling, “god, i want to make them bleed.”

the pure and ridiculous contrast of it all makes you choke out a laugh, face burning at the small distance between you and that same uncertainty still bubbling in the pit of your stomach.

however, billy’s eyes soften significantly at the sound, and a soft chuckle ripples from his own lips before his face begins to inch closer. all that doubt is at once forgotten when you feel his breath on your lips as he whispers out:

“i love the sound of your laugh.”

and his lips meet yours. colliding softly at first, as though to see if you’d pull away. but, as you instinctively lean in, melting against him, his confidence reappears. one hand raising to rest securely at the back of your neck to ensure your don’t pull away, the other falling to grasp tightly at your hip, fingertips pushing gently against the soft skin. soon his tongue his swiping your bottom lip and it’s impossible to say no. there’s the ghosts of smiles on both your lips and you find yourself gripping greedily onto his shirt, fisting it and pulling him even closer which draws a satisfied hum from him.

it is as your both pulling away for air that you realise that was the first compliment in a long time that didn’t make you recoil. and maybe it was because of the incredibly distracting sensation of billy’s lips on yours but, you decided, if that was what it would take to finally make you accept it you can’t complain; and, by the way billy’s nudging his nose against yours and sliding his hands up and down your waist, you realise he probably wouldn’t either.

[aetheternity]

How they simp ft the Kny boys

I wrote one of these for Aot and I remembered how little I write for Kny so here's one for the Demon Slayer boys. This was written as if the person they're crushing on is two years older.

(The aggressive simp): Inosuke

☆ I mean come on who didn't see this one coming??

☆ Inosuke otherwise known as the aggressive mfer that can't spell crush let alone deal with one.

☆ Poor baby is mad confused as to why any little thing you say to him makes his heart mush and his face hot.

☆ Deadass goes to Tanjiro and is like,

• "Fuck is wrong with Y/N? Why do they make my face hot? Should I fight them?"

• And Tanjiro's like 😶😐 "I think you have a crush.."

• "Yeah! I do wanna crush them!"

• Tanjiro questioning his life choices: 😑😒

☆ Like he goes up to you fully intent on starting more shit than a bad Netflix original mean girl but you say,

• "Oh, Hi Inosuke."

☆ And he's just thinking, Why am I here?? Just to suffer?

☆ Personality does a full 180. His heart turned purple, his legs inside out. (If you understand this reference ily 💞).

☆ After a while he hits the last stage of grief, (Acceptance) and he slowly but surely starts to just follow you around. He doesn't understand what's so special about you that you caught his attention and he honestly doesn't care at this point he thrives off your attention in any way shape or form.

☆ You smile at him he's screaming internally. You say hi to him and he's floating. He finally reached a place where he doesn't even care that he feels this way he wants to experience it as long as possible.

☆ At some point you acknowledge his feelings and explain how you feel. (Not that it makes any sense to him). And give him a quick peck on the cheek of his mask. Probably after a really tough battle where he saved you from danger.

☆ Mfer is blushing hard asf under that sweaty ass mask. That's your problem now..

☆ Zenitsu dead makes fun of him the whole way back but Inosuke's so lost in thought that Tanjiro genuinely contemplates taking him to a doctor.

(The brotherly simp): Tanjiro

☆ Let's be honest he treats everyone like a sibling.

☆ But it's actually pretty cute when it comes to you.

☆ He'll ask you when's the last time you've eaten at least fourteen times a day and if you have a habit of not eating he'll bring you food.

☆ He knows whenever you've been training late or had a long mission so he'll bring you something to drink (most likely water) to keep your spirits up.

☆ Knows you're sad even if you're rooms away from him and will sit by your side and listen to you vent then give you advice.

☆ He likes sitting next to you no matter where it is because he loves listening to you talk about literally anything.

☆ Honestly Tanjiro's probably the least obvious except for the blushing and stuttering whenever you compliment him on his form or something.

☆ When he confesses it's straight up no beating around the bush just honest Tanjiro and you give him a small kiss on the lips as a way of accepting his feelings.

☆ Honestly after that he might not get sad again for a year.

(The hysterical simp): Zenitsu

☆ This mfer can't handle shit like come on it's literally canon.

☆ He follows you around like a lost puppy the second he realizes he's crushing on you. And you better have liked him first or just been a really patient person overall to like all the attention he gives you.

☆ Straight up does a bee line (like the down bad man he is) for you whenever he hears your voice.

☆ Finds a new way to embarrass himself every single time he's around you. But he's actually just trying to be cool. And he probably thinks he's being cool sometimes so 🤷‍♀️

☆ He most definitely helped you on a mission one day and you got to see the full extent of his power. Which if you're that kind of person would try to help him reach his full potential. (I mean he clearly has a lot of potential.) Which forces you two to spend more time together.

☆ Surprisingly during that time you get to see the less loud version of him. But what really tips the scales in his favor is when he saves you from getting hurt. During personal training or a mission doesn't matter.

☆ You end up telling him exactly how you feel and of course he accepts your feelings with loud, unbridled enthusiasm.

☆Actually faints into a little pile of goo when you kiss his forehead. Mfer laying on the ground with metaphorically hearts circling his head.

☆ You straight up got this boy sighing in contentment. If you don't end up staying with him while he lays there he'll be found by Tanjiro and Inosuke later. Good luck to Tanjiro having to listen to Zenitsu scream about his happiness.

(The confused simp): Giyu

☆ Giyu doesn't know he has a crush. He doesn't know he's simping he just knows he wants your attention. Hilarious antics begin:

☆ Well in a way. See Giyu's never met someone like you. Someone who actively goes out of their way to immediately make friends with him and then continue to do so even after he's shown them his version of affection.

☆ He understands nothing about you or his feelings but he knows he wants to keep you as close as possible at all times. He knows his heart flutters when you're near and his palms get sweatier (which he originally thought was just his breathing technique.)

☆ He sees you standing across the room and comes over to issue his normal greeting. Sees you training by yourself and just joins you in the same room.

☆ His only problem so far has probably been the fact that you're very popular so whenever he actually does have time to interact with you you're probably with someone else.

☆ One day you guys are on a mission together and you just tell him straight up that you have feelings for him and.. he doesn't say a word, stops where he's standing, his hands get all shaky and his entire face and neck go red as he tries to mumble out something.

☆ At some point he gets some sort of mutual confession out of him as you comb strands of hair back from his face with your fingers.

☆ You could give him a kiss but you just got Giyuu.exe to start working again so better save it for another day.

(The bubbly simp): Rengoku

☆ I just love the idea of Rengoku being all weirdly shy I think it's the cutest thing on earth so here we go!

☆ He's always grinning and talking energetically but when he's talking to you his voice goes down like 20 octaves and he's got the dopiest grin on his face. Out here looking like: ☺

☆ As if Zenitsu and Inosuke weren't obvious with their simping Rengoku's probably even worse.

☆ He legit turns his whole body to face you when you join a conversation between him and anyone else. Face all pink as he smiles brightly at you.

☆ He's got a little sigh going and everyone is thoroughly creeped out by all of it so they try to flee every time you and Rengoku make contact.

☆ He always finds ways to find you and he's just like:

• "Hi, Y/N! What're you doing!"

• You: "Eating lunch.."

• Him: "That's great."

• You: 😃😀🤨

☆ When he finally confesses you're just like it's about time and you give him a small peck on the lips. Now watch him walk around for the rest of the day with pink cheeks and a skip in his step like he owns the place.

[syubub]

May 13th Reading

Definitely long awaited and way bigger than I intended it to be so buckle up.

Funky disclaimer: this is for entertainment purposes only and not to be taken as fact! This is my interpretation of the cards!

Oh boy. The continuation of yoongis soulmate saga.

(Note frome future me: it's not proofread but I'm hungry. Sorry for mistakes!)

So so so so

Let's start.

I started with all the normal jazz. Connecting with his energy and shit. Same as usual same old same old. Platform= same same. I was like, "hey, let's talk about your soulmate and the whole may 13th shit" and we connected via energy stringy thing to the forehead and such. I was intresting bc my end of the string was kinda my energy color! Neato. Looks like some rest has really done me good!

Okay, here's where I start actually asking shit. I made notes at this point before the reading as I usually do. I'm just gonna insert the screen shot here.

The 14 thing really fucked me up. You'll see later. Also, when I got the whole Pisces Jupiter thing I had to do me some googling bc we established that Jupiter went into Pisces ON May 13th so I was like?? Am I missing something?

I was. I forgot that it goes retrograde and then co.es back to Pisces on December 28th. And I do indeed think it to be significant.

The shit about temperance makes a lot of sense. In yoongis first soulmate read I flipped my shit bc he was like, "You're gonna get temperance reverse" in regards to a card for his soulmate and I was like "pft whatever. Don't play me like that"

And then I got temperance reverse. It's been a significant card from the jump.

I asked him if he had any advice for his soulmate and that's what "Don't wait for big things, you'll miss the small ones that lead you to bigger things" and "Look for facts before assuming" and "Don't try pushing it, forcing it won't make sense" and "A spade is a spade/ ace is an ace" and "Don't make ill informed guesses" all were

Now this part:

"Union has happened , yet to on the physical"

Gave me some hints thankfully because he straight up said no more hints.

This ties back into the whole Jupiter thing too. The seeds are/ have been planted and now they have to grow before they can be harvested.

Well Mr. Yoongi, I'm impatient and I don't want to wait. I want to see you in love pronto.

Anyways

He showed me a little dream box/ trinket box looking thing and a super vague Keychain with no further explanation... so... there's that I guess.

I can't quite decide if "Don't make ill informed guesses" was a tongue-in-cheek pike at me or if it was genuine advice to his soulmate? He just loves to not explain things.

Now let's begin the monster read.

So. The first row of cards

I asked the question, "what the fuck was May 13th and what was it's purpose in regards to your connection"

Important is what it was lol. I interpret this as them finding their footing and this being the starting point of the genuine foundation being layer. Like they've been manifesting eachother for a while but May 13th marked the start of them making the real life changes in their actual lives that will be the set up for them meeting.

The seven of coins is about thoughtful planning and creating security/ stable plan. The tower is essentially ripping away anything and everything that was built on unstable foundation and challenging/ testing your character (an extremely rude awakeing if you will). Judgement is releasing the past so you can rise above it and confronting yourself as you are (Also legit awakening) the queen of coins is financial security and self confidence in your abilities. Ten of coins is prosperity and abundance and most of all, stability. Eight of wands is explosion of potential and rapid movement. Temperance is awareness and balance between physical and spiritual. It's also that quiet peace where you find balance.

So. Seeing all those cards it really does seem like maybe his soulmate took on something new that could lead straight to union? Same for yoongi. I'd like to analyze and recent or new-ish habits or hobbies he's picked up?

Moving right along though. I asked what the 13th did for each of them in their personal life and personal journey. Kinda like what came as a result of that energy? Let's start with yoongles

This was really intresting to me. I think he definitely gained some form of clarity about the situation with that sun card. The 5 of cups tells me that either he was kinda forced to confront some of his flaws in a way that he was trying to avoid or he had to consciously let go of something dear to him? Could be something he had to leave behind because it crumbled with the tower moment but he didn't see it coming or didn't know that it was time to part with it? With that queen of wands though fits beautifully with the sun! Its like he's found warmth after a long winter. Definitely found a spark of compassion and generosity from a place of happiness and love rather than anger, fear, obligation or pitty.

I asked for clarity cards/ anything else that may 13th signified bringing in and we got the 2 of cups and 10 of swords. I have two thoughts. Either he let go of a relationship that he was already in because he didn't feel as though they were particularly compatible anymore (Also ties into the above section) OR the 13th had made him very much consciously aware of his soulmates incoming status and he is now preparing and working on himself for when this person comes. The 10 of swords would be him releasing the past and the pain and any ill fitting behavior that don't vibe with him any longer. Yellow really seems to be working for him by the way.

Soulmate time

Lol. All signs point to his soulmate genuinely starting a new venture. New creative pursuit that will bring them good money. 10 of pentacles is abundance, prosperity and stability. The ace of wands is a new creative spark and passion and it's the first big steps into something new. The 2 of wands is "the world is in the palm of your hands" vibes. Choices need to be made swiftly and with the ace of wands I think they will be. With the heirophant too, it will be a well informed decision because they've been manifesting this and has been searching for all the possible information.

As for clarity, we have the moon. Damn. Soulmates been doing that shadow work. Dredging up all their bullshit and getting rid of it while still taking the time to sit with it and release it so nothing is unresolved. Also probably extra creative due to all the emotional baggage being thrown out. (Definitely helping with the ace of wands vibes tbh)

Now for the bad boys in the middle

The question I asked is what those individual changes (detailed in the last two sections) will bring for the bond and I just can with them. These fuckers. I am so invested in their love story bc it's so... them? And just so fucking ROMANTIC. UGH I CAN'T.

Back to the point. High priestess, 4 of wands and the lovers. The high priestess is deep knowing and insane intuition, the 4 of wands is the purest joy and marriage and the lovers is well, the lovers.a magical union.

FUCK DUDE I NEED THIS TO BE A ROMCOM.

For the row of bottom cards

I asked if they had anything at all to add so I'm gonna explain each card individually bc I think they could be individual tid bits of shit.

Knight of coins is good news about finances/ money looking promising and organized work (also dependability!!). Death is all about transformation, the beginning of a new chapter and accepting in order to move foward. Ace of coins is spiritual and material abundance and also a reminder to keep grounded. Page of swords is confidence, important news coming and really good insight! Roots out secrets or hidden things like a truffle pig. The star is promising potential, healing and guidance from an enexpected place. The two of cups is a soul connection, love, intuition especially in regards to another person and a good bind. The emperor is self awareness, foresight, fearlessness to achieve a goal and confidence. Eight of coins rev is poor discipline and skating by on low effort.

Now to the sides!

Yoongi is the left, soulmate is the right.

So, let's begin with yoongi. The first two cards are anything he wants to say to his soulmate. Wheel of fortune and three of swords reverse. I take this as "its all in divine time/ it's destiny" (wheel of fortune) and "trust your intuition. It's okay to get hurt, you just need to remember you can always pick yourself up" (3of swords rev.)

We have now cards that I asked what he was learning through this process/ in this time. Be positive and first step.

The last two cards are affirmations he wants to give his soulmate.

"When I introduce joy to a situation, I change the vibrational frequency of what's happening around me" and "directing my focus onto what's thriving creates more of what I want"

Now for soulmates cards (same structure)

Strength and eight of swords. "You're stronger than you think. Take every part of yourself and acknowledge it. You're a force to be reckoned with" (strength) and (soulmate snapped at him on this) "the only thing holding you captive is you."

Now we have peer pressure (I think soulmate is learning to say "fuck you" and "fuck off" to people who have a set idea of how everyone should be living their lives), emotional healing and open your arms to receiving.

Then we have "its good to feel good" (lol I feel like yoongi definitely needs this one) and "when I connect to the spiritual realm, I open the door to recieve divine guidance, clear direction, and great wisdom"

The last stretch my friends.

So. Completion, leave behind the things that no longer serve you. Exist in the present and don't keep mulling over the past or any future happenings. Magic, pay attention to the magic around you. Listen for the signs of the universe and take them as they come (essentially listen to divine guidance) . Be open minded but logical as well. Luminous warrior, try focusing on the good in yourself instead of berating yourself for every small flaw. Spiritual path, self explanatory. The blade, your power can be a weapon when used willy nilly (most often wounding the wielder) or it can heal. Don't fear it but also consider how you choose to utilize it. The give away, be greaful for the sake of being greatful for it, not because you want something in return. The rain maker, manifestation station. Create with the tools you have because you have everything you need in order to manifest. "Don't take life personally"

Now we have heaven sent.

""Let yourself be helped" assistance is coming your way so act on it and say yes"

" This Oracle also comes with the message that you are to trust in the things that you feel and say to others without knowing why. It moves them. You might not understand, but through trust you are allowing yourself not to overthink and censor yourself. As such you are able to become a vessel through which the spiritual gift can be passed on to others. Don't block yourself. Let life happen through you. Only benefit can come from this."

And free from judgment, free to love

" If you have been asking life for a solution to a specific difficulty you have been having, this Oracle comes with the message that a solution is in gestation right now. This situation is already being sorted out and the resolution will come to fruition very soon. Hold tight and wait for the eminent birth of that resolution."

" This Oracle also brings you a message about love. You may find that you are loving, or soon will love, in a different way. You may worry about this love, given that it defies what you have known or been taught about love. Perhaps you are becoming able to love another tremendously, even though you don't have much of a personal relationship with them. You might question if this love is real. It is real Kama it is just happening at a different level to the love and attachment you experience when you are involved in a personal relationship with someone. It is not more or less, it is just a different facet of love. It may be that you are opening up to love the planet and her creatures, including the animals, the ocean dwelling life, your own body, the trees and so on, more than before period you may feel passionately purposeful about giving your time and energy to causes that protect and nurture the Earth and her creatures. You are affirmed in this love too. The universal mother is operating through you to nurture life. She will support you in your work, so that you can continue To come from love and not become drained, depleted or lost in despair or fear of futility. Instead, you will be energised and expanded by your dedicated service to life."

" Finally, this Oracle has a message for those who may be feeling alone or lonely in a need of greater nurturing from others. You are asked to stop, relax, centre and settle into your body to feel your connection with life itself. The air in your lungs is the same as the air that moves through the trees. The water in your blood is the same water that fills the oceans and is moved by the phases of the moon. The flesh of your body is the same substance as the body of the Earth itself. The heat in your digestive system is the same fire and heat as that from the Sun. Feel this connection, then do something nice for another without agenda. Make a donation, even if just a small one, smile, say a prayer, sent out a good thought or make a wish for another. That's it. You have connected to life again and in doing so, life can connect with you. And so it shall.

And that's all for the cards but but but.

Someone (either my guide or yoongi) was like, "do a song. Do a song. Do a song." And I was like, "oki doki, sounds good.

So I asked what numbers I should try refreshing and then it hit me. The number 14 came up before the reading and it seemed a bit misplaced? So I did 14 shuffles and look what popped up

You gotta be fucking with me.

Istg these fools will actually be the death of me dude. Euphoria is so romantic and I lowkey feels like it describes a bit of what their bond must be like.

YOONGGGIIII

Anyway,

I came back to the platform to be like, "thanks homie" and it was weird bc he was practically pure energy? Like usually I visualize his energy as what his physical body looks like because it's easier to comprehend? But nope, he was just a big shimmery glob of energy.

As I was going to disconnect, a few things happened. I felt tingly and the platform was vibrating almost? So I was like, "hold on, what the fuck is this?"

And then

It hit me

"MIN YOONGI IS YOUR SOULMATE HERE??"

I could tell this fuckin asshole was smug even in his blue glob form.

The color was... blue like yoongi but also a light lavender/ pink kinda vibe. Pretty damn distinct.

I was so stoked and I thought we'd all get to chat and I could yell at his soulmate for being an elusive asshat

But Mr smug butt had different plans.

My dude dropped a little marble thing in my hand and I was like ??? And he was like, "you'll know when you need it" and I was like ?????

My guide took pity on me and said, "it's just a representation on information that you've been given but it isn't the proper time to unpack it yet"

Cool cool so like and energetic zip file that will release itself whenever it damn well pleases? Cool cool cool.

(Asshole)

Anyway, I genuinely think that my excitement of this whole situation must somehow also influence how yoongis energy handles my prodding? Like what the fuck is this marble bullshit?

To top it all off, he gives me a friendly shove off of his platform.

Thanks, buddy.

Now we are here. And as always, I'm left with more questions.

My main take away is that amay 13th through July 28th will be all the foundation and ground work and December 28th 2021 through May 10th (11th? 9th?) 2022 will be a more likely time for physical union and actual relationship stuffs.

Anyone who knows more about astrology please feel free to chime in on this whole Jupiter in Pisces bit! My understanding is super surface level!!

~~~~

That was a big boi and now my thumbs hurt real bad. Hope you were entertained by the chaos.

[redxblueihateloveyou]

Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime, books, movies or tv series)? Thanks....

Holy shit that is such a tough question haha. I was really like trying to remember all the stuff I've read and watched ever and my brain short circuted for a moment lol this is in no particular order and from original sources (no offense to any adaptations, even if I like them).

Richard Cypher (I mean Terry Goodkind's 12+4 books), Cara (/Kara, also from there), Wu Xie (DMBJ), Zhang Qiling (DMBJ), Lan Zhan (MDZS), Stiles Stilinski (Teen Wolf), Akashi Seijuro (KNB), Natsume Takashi (Natsume Yuujinchou), Haruka Nanase (Free!), Steve Rogers (you know that one xD).

Fun fact, not to be dramatic or anything, but I really want to say special thanks for Richard & Wu Xie. The way they go about life in general and their incredible trait of finding ways out of seemingly impossible situations without falling into depression and genuinely finding joy in tiny things in some godforsaken ugly ass situations, their adventures and way of thinking got me through some of the toughest shit of my short but hella weird life. Like I've been raised good ofc and got exteremely lucky with my family and I'm saying it without trying to make anyone go like "oh poor you" (I mean you know I never share anything here, I genuinely feel like that won't help anyone really, nor me focusing on that also here, nor anyone with their own problems reading this, thats why I just take breaks and come back when I can), but things of last years like... packing medical document while there's blood everywhere cause my elder sister almost cut off her tongue and dad is in shock, mom in the hospital with internal stomach bleeding, my weird spine operation where doctors for some reason refused to even answer what it was, camping in the hospital while little sister close to diabetic coma at age of 5, putting my cat to sleep bc of the painful neck cancer, grandpa dying twice in one day, finding weird bump in my chest and for 2 months of awful tests thinking "oh hell that might be it" fairly recently... etc lol (I'm not even counting like "world things" here).

I would go down if it wasn't for their way of thinking 😂. Like if I had other mentality, not enough brains and humor sometimes too and went wrong ways about these things, I would drown istg.

It's mostly from them I got all the whining and pitying yourself isn't an option, don't focus on the bad no matter how bad it is find a solution instead, always be happy about you have right now, don't blame anything on others and don't think anyone owes you anything, the first person who can help you is you, those who love you most important what others think doesn't matter, no matter how bad it is move your butt, idiots be idiots move on (esp thoughts of 6th SOT book and Restart is what keeps me breathing when I genuinely think that I won't be able to survive the pure idiocity of the crowd and be like its okay), if you truly can't change anything and did everything possible then just adapt to that and learn how to thrive with what you got etc.

Richard was there for me for a while (like 7 years or smth I think), Wu Xie came recently (but already been tremendous help to me haha). I just think if if wasn't for these series, I'd for sure be sitting somewhere pitying myself about how "life is unfair" instead of being happy. And thats a gift really.

I know half of it coming from the fact that there were times my family didn't have much, so its probably why I can be so happy with so little, but finding positivite things in some complete ass is for sure coming from these guys haha. I remember first time Richard pulled off this thing with anderith ppl my jaw was literally on the floor, I was so impressed with this book, I really was like "I wanna be like that" lmao. It was like... stripped of fucking everything, forced to be surrounded by most idiotic brain-washed haters (they were also extra religious.. which is a special pain for a person like me), separated from the dying and suffering love of your life, just the whole absolute horrid of the whole situation (I can't even describe it, but Istg it was painful to read for me, I was so pissed, I was reading like " jfc how is he even gathering himself? I wouldn't be able to handle even 2 mins of that"), but he not only fucking found ways without even teeny tiny histeric, he managed to come out a fucking winner too. I'm still to this day don't think any character ever shook me like that. And I've read and watched TOO much stuff.

I mean, with recent events also, last weeks I don't even wanna start on what we did and what happened and what ppl around me got like about many things. If it wasn't for Wu Xie's life motto I'd be along with many into the pit of "why", instead of actually you know.. doing things you gotta do. So they hold a special place in my heart in their own way, where you go like "oh damn this fiction character changed my life" not just cause they're your type and certain traits that attract you, you know lmao ;)

[troquantary]

Didyme, Part 2: Something, Something, Plato's Allegory of the Cave

Continuing from here, and we’re doing sub-parts for this bit. I’m genuinely surprised I had this much to say. (And fun fact, I almost lost the entire goddamn post, but fortunately I was copy-pasting into Word just in case. Not today, Satan.)

2.1. What Canon Tells Us

Didyme’s murder by Aro (and with Caius’ apparent assistance, either during or afterwards), is only mentioned on the page in Life and Death, the 10th Anniversary gender-swapped version of Twilight. Edythe/Edward mentions it briefly when discussing the painting of the leaders Carine/Carlisle brought back from Volterra, but it’s just background information with little narrative weight. I bring it up just to highlight Caius’ involvement and knowledge -- I’ll get back to that.

Now, here’s the “canon” backstory we have to work with. Per the illustrated guide, Didyme was Aro’s younger sister, and he turned her at some point after meeting Marcus, Caius, and Athenadora. Interestingly, the Guide doesn’t say anything about Aro returning to Didyme out of brotherly love; apparently he just wanted to see if she would have a powerful gift like his, only to be underwhelmed (”disappointed,” according to his Guide entry) by her actual ability -- she made people happy just by being around them. Then she and Marcus fell in love, sharing “the strongest romantic bond of any of the Volturi” (from Marcus’ Guide entry), and this prompted a suddenly very single Aro to seek out his own mate, Sulpicia. The Guide says Didyme “distracted” Marcus from Aro’s goals, and that the pair eventually made plans to split off on their own, leading Aro to murder Didyme so he could hold onto Marcus and his valuable gift. Although nothing written so far suggests that Aro even liked his sister, the Guide does state that Aro “truly loved her” and that his grief upon killing Didyme was genuine.

Apparently Caius’ role in all is was something Meyer thought up later, because none of the leaders’ Guide entries mention him being in on it. (You can’t see me, but I’m staring pointedly at Part One.)

2.2. Fuck Canon, Actually

(This just seemed like the funniest place for a cut. Continued below~)

I’ll be honest with you, person who’s persistent/unfortunate enough to still be here: very little about this murder scenario makes sense to me. I’m going to start with the “disappointing” nature of Didyme’s gift and that it was supposedly much less useful to Aro than Marcus’, because that’s just...stupid, frankly, and there’s no way Aro would have missed the inherent utility of Didyme’s gift. I don’t even have to read into anything to get this idea -- the Guide itself shows us how useful it is! It says right there in Marcus’ entry that Aro went off to turn Didyme, and returned with his sister, “along with the first members of the guard -- vampires who were drawn to Didyme’s aura of happiness.” That is a direct quote.

Just -- I practically shrieked when I read that. You’re telling me that Didyme’s gift was the stated reason their coven got its first subordinates, and I’m supposed to believe that Aro thought that was disappointing? Fuck off! Fuck off!! Even if Didyme’s happiness aura isn’t as powerful as Corin’s opium haze, well, Aro doesn’t have Corin yet, does he? He has every reason in the world to want to keep Didyme around, drawing other vampires to his cause -- even if most of those vampires aren’t gifted or skilled enough to join the guard, it’s still good PR.

At this early stage in the Volturi’s rise to power, it isn’t a good time to lose Didyme -- or any of his inner coven, really. Yet Aro apparently considered her disposable enough that he killed her. I can’t square this with what we know about Aro: that he’s still coherent despite holding god-knows how many people’s lives in his head; that he’s very intelligent; that he’s cunning, charming, and persuasive. Aro, once he learned they were thinking about leaving, would have tried to talk to Didyme and Marcus and done everything in his power to convince them to stay just a bit longer, until the Volturi’s position was more secure. And maybe he did; the timeline of all this is hazy, but nothing in the Guide suggests that Aro jumped straight to duplicity and murder. Clearly, though, whatever negotiations or arguments he presented failed. So what does their desire to leave the Volturi at this critical stage say about Didyme, or Marcus for that matter?

2.3. What It Says About Didyme and Marcus (Mostly Headcanon)

Brace yourself, because we’re into full headcanon territory now. To follow me, please refer to @therealvinelle ‘s meta about the larger mission of the Volturi and why they’re necessary, because I’m starting from the perspective that the Volturi are ultimately a force working in vampires’ and humans’ favor. While Meyer and the Guide would have you believe that Aro’s just power-hungry, actually looking at the impact of the Volturi and the benefits of enforcing secrecy shows that his broader vision isn’t just world domination, but establishing a world in which vampires and humans can both thrive and endure. There’s no way the rest of the inner coven was unaware of this goal; we know Aro talks a lot, so he’s certainly talked his coven’s ears off about this.

Now, we know very little about Marcus and what he was like before he was all dead inside. Based on what would be a logical balance of personalities, with Aro as lead decision-maker and Caius as ruthless enforcer, it seems likely that Marcus was originally the voice of reason and/or mercy. I also think Marcus would have had a strong sense of duty. The Guide says that Aro was the first friend Marcus had as a vampire, and I believe that Marcus cared about him very much and was committed to the Volturi. I think he would have been genuinely conflicted about leaving, especially considering the stabler, safer world the Volturi have been striving to build, and which they haven’t yet secured. Again, it’s a very bad time for any of the leadership to split off -- but in the end, Marcus and Didyme are going to do it anyway.

What for, though? Why leave? @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin has an interesting take on that question here: that Didyme saw that she and Marcus would be locked into the Volturi life and a thankless existence for eternity and tried to opt out while she still could. I like it a lot, it’s a great post and that scenario makes sense, but the tone of it feels...too forgiving. Maybe that’s because I’m evil. But the way I see it, given the magnitude of the Volturi’s mission, and its (at best) very tenuous grip on power at the time Marcus and Didyme plan to leave (they haven’t even defeated the Romanians yet), jeopardizing the entire operation so that they can pursue their romance unburdened strikes me as...well, fundamentally selfish on some level, so much that I find myself side-eyeing Didyme and Marcus for it. Although to be clear, it’s not the desire to live their own lives apart from the Volturi that I find selfish, just the timing of their departure.

Honestly, I’d like not to vilify another female character if I don’t have to. Given everything I’ve just said, I see Didyme in much the same way as I see Bella: not a bad person, but someone with definite selfish tendencies. At best, she’s likely short-sighted or naive if she doesn’t see how leaving the Volturi at this stage is fucking them over in a big way. However, I hesitate to read into the happiness aura as a straightforward indication of Didyme’s fundamental goodness; I think she probably was kind, charming, and delightful to be around, hence the nature of her gift -- but that capacity for selfishness is still there. (I’m certain Meyer wants us to take her gift as proof of Didyme’s goodness, to reinforce how evil Aro is for killing her...but I think I’ve made my disdain for what Meyer wants me to think pretty clear.)

2.4. MURDER MOST FOUL

I am not saying it was justifiable or okay for Aro to murder his sister. I’m really not. It’s actually better, from a character standpoint, that it isn’t okay -- that Aro has to carry this with him for the rest of his life while Marcus sits in the throne next to him, reduced to a husk, so that in effect Aro has lost them both after all. It’s got that Greek tragedy element @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin​ mentioned in her post. (Even better from that standpoint, the Guide implies that Aro found Chelsea relatively soon after killing Didyme, which compounds the tragedy.) I mean, it’s terrible, and it hurts me because I love Aro, but it’s compelling stuff.

What I am saying is, I can see how their insistence on leaving might have deeply hurt and offended him. And that brings me to my issue with the calculated murder scenario the Guide gives us -- I still think Didyme’s gift is too valuable for Aro to throw away by killing her in cold...venom (or whatever), even as the price for keeping Marcus in the fold. Plus, there’s the fact that Aro does love Didyme, and I imagine her gift makes it very difficult for people to think of harming her...when they’re calm, anyway.

Yeah, the only way I can really see the murder happening is if Aro killed Didyme in the heat of an argument about her leaving, possibly even by accident -- except you can’t accidentally kill a vampire, can you? It’s a very deliberate process wherein you have to dismember them and burn every piece, which also means it probably takes long enough that any irrational, overwhelming rage would wear off before you were done. But now that you’ve started....

I mean, at that point it would certainly be awkward to put your half-rubble sister back together, and Aro would be in a whole other load of shit even if he did. It’s possible, given what we’re told, that Aro could have lashed out and yanked Didyme’s head off before snapping out of it, only to realize that his sole option now is to finish the job. If he doesn’t kill Didyme now, she and Marcus won’t just leave, they’ll be sworn enemies of Aro from then on. And thanks to Didyme’s gift being the draw for a lot of the guard, and the inherently bad look of a leader who would brutally attack his own sister, a chunk of the guard would probably leave with them, destroying Aro’s plans. No, the only way to salvage it is to follow through.

Then Aro has to call in Caius for help with the cover-up, because it wasn’t actually planned and it’s just pure luck that no one walked in on the murder as it was happening.

And maybe Aro learns a hard lesson about learning to let people walk away, leaving the possibility open that they could be drawn in again. Because if Aro had just waited, he would have found Chelsea, and with her gift he could have had Marcus and Didyme back again.

Assuming everything didn’t fall apart as soon as they left, of course. But that’s a whole other what-if scenario.

[thecitythatdoesntsleep]

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[Tags & Tw] Slavery, grooming, abuse, human pet auction, implied/referenced noncon, noncon touching, magnetic restraint implants, drugging/non-consensual drug use, vampire whumpee, they/them whumpee

"This one is damaged, paper says. Apparently the physical defects didn't fix in the turning process."

"Shit, mark it down and put it in with the rest of'em anyways. Just tell the man up front to run a deal."

"You don't think boss'll care?"

"Money is money, right? So long as these bloodsuckers sell, he won't give two fucks."

It was dark as the room filled with stagnant silence, the audience waiting with baited breath for the lights to switch on and announcer to appear.

When he did, it was a little less than grand; a well-suited gentleman taking center stage and cradling a mic close to his lips.

"Welcome to the 500th, yes you heard it right ladies and gentlemen, 500th auction of Lifepets."

Uproarious clapping filled the renovated opera house and it took a long pause to wait for it to thin down. When it did, everyone's attention was hinged on the man's every word.

"I'm pleased to inform that because of this enormous milestone, we've gone above and beyond. Tonight, we'll be auctioning off 50 freshly turned pets."

A cheerful response from the audience would be in any other case, a jovial thing. In this happenstance, it was an ugly, terrifying sound.

"They have been trained briefly, defanged, microchipped and magnetic implants have been surgically installed to each of their limbs for tangle free restraint."

The crowd gave slight chatter amongst themselves, 'ooh's' and 'ahh's' being given the more that the man's voice denoted across the speakers. There was an air of impatience, with every minute spent in lingering wait for the beginning of the festivities.

"Each of the pets will start at a low, low bid of $5,500. And the filing process will be a low, set rate of $500 for this special night only."

Large display monitors flipped on behind the tables and chairs that were set up for guests, their image turning to a small string of information about the upcoming, first selling item. All sight turned to peek at it and very little description was given seeing as the pet would be brought out on stage soon.

"We thank you all from the bottoms of our hearts for helping make this possible and keeping our business thriving. Whether you're looking for a caretaker, a sexual partner, release for that anger you don't have to feel guilty for... Lifepets has you covered."

At the 'joke' the man had made, there was laughter of all kinds and some lasted longer than others and each had it's own tone. Embarrassment, genuine humor, some patrons looked at each other with slimy grins that spread ear to ear. Like it really was such a funny thing to tease about.

"Without further delay, if everyone could look at the screens in the back of the building. To get us started right, we're going to drop the initial bid for this first pet down to $500. You could pay as little as $1,000 to take them home tonight."

The first vampire was brought out in the darkness of the stage behind the announcer, their limp, doll-like body being propped up in such a way that it held itself up. Whatever drugs they were given were strong, they couldn't manage to pull their head up much from it's half-mast position on their shoulders.

The screens displayed in large, white font on black backgrounds.

22 Years old at turning.

Blonde hair, blue eyes.

One tattoo, no major scarring.

60 days mandatory training completed.

More bright, blinding overheads turned on and it made the bound vampire on stage want to recoil into a ball despite their lethargy. Everything had giant, shining prisms casting off every beam of light; the reflections off mirrors and glass tables illuminating the room with a dim ambiance.

A gloved man grabbed the downcast head of the terrified creature and forced it's head up to meet eyes with the crowd. A tinge of piercing blue cast a ring in other worldly eyes and pupils trembled in what they saw before them.

Wolves, it was like a pack of hungry wolves. Being promised they can torment and torture without the need to feel anything akin to remorse. Even though they were once human, the modification to their DNA made all the difference. The stillness to their heart and deadened response to their lungs was the damning physical traits that lead them to a life of servitude.

"Now I won't lie to you... The discount is for damage, from what we understand, this pet has a few physical conditions that weren't reversed in the transformation process. It's left ear is deaf and left eye blind. All the better though, huh? Wouldn't be hard to sneak up on this one, hahaha."

The gloved man turned the vampires face towards the near-by projector camera and fingers squeezed into the hollows of their cheeks to tell them to open their mouth. When they did, two gaping extractions were throwing off their bite-line, teeth missing all together to prove their fangs had been dealt with.

"Give a little something sexy for the camera..." The man whispered and shoved a leather cased thumb against a plush, pink tongue. It idly wrapped around the digit and dry, uncared for lips closed in an absent sucking motion.

"Their second virginity hasn't been claimed, though, they've been shown how to do a little of the basics. So you're able to get them put to work right away."

No matter where the vampire looked, there was a seedy, low-brow looking person, staring them down like a predator to prey. Their mind was overwhelmed by the drugs in their system but also the thought of eventually being alone with one of these menacing faces.

Drool now clung to their lips from the unwelcomed finger in their mouth but once it was gone, the distraction was over and it almost made the vampire whimper in distress. They just wanted to get it over with, or stay with their handlers. At least the handlers had a guide of loose rules they had to follow.

The more that the man talked, the more the faces around them contorted with plans of sadistic glee. The vampires vision doubled at times, making the room spin with dozens of sets of prying eyes and wicked smiles.

A particularly cruel tug at the magnetic restraints and the gloved man had the vampire yanked down further to their hands and knees. Another push and he bent their middle down, accentuating the curve of their backside and the spread of their thighs.

Tears built up in the blue, ocean eyes and they were fought back when the leather glove carded through their hair. They would never have a chance of getting a good home or serving a worthy master if they were such awful cry babies. Or so their inner voice told them.

The smallest spark of motivation gave the vampire a reason to arch their back and lean into the touch that soothed across their body to cause them to naturally react.

Impatience started to build in the crowd and the announcer was merely letting them all take in the show.

Bare, porcelain skin being displayed on multiple, floor to ceiling screens as the vampire's lips hung open in the tiniest display of pleasure. Fingers curled into blonde hair and ruined the look of lust on their features; a ringing stab of pain to awaken their senses and widen their dopey doe-eyes. Shock looked so pretty when it was tacked to the end of bliss.

"So... Do I hear $500 for the discount pet?"

"$500!"

"$1,000!"

"$3,000!"

"$5,000!"

A twisted pang of relief filled the vampire when they heard the different voices from all around the building echo their bids. The number went higher and higher and it gave them the smallest sliver of hope. That they weren't too damaged and broken for a master after all and that they'd be able to be sold. They told themselves they would be grateful to even get a home but now, it seemed like it was really going to happen.

The vampire felt the unlatching of their magnetic shackles and instead, the gloved man crossed their wrists together for the plates to lock to themselves. He grabbed their arm and pulled them to their feet as the bidding war started to come to a final climax. Ready to drag them back behind the stage curtain to prepare for their future owner.

"Going once, going twice...and... SOLD. To the guest at table 38 for $16,800!"