#they’re white especially when they’re upper class

[bluedalahorse]

Your last post about Nils leads me to a question about Vincent : how could a noble old money rich upper class swedish boy look so... not like all of that ?

My question is about look and behavior. August represents all of that perfectly with his turtlenecks. But Vincent looks more like "a white trash red neck" (to quote his own word so I won't offend any one).

His clothes, haircut, manierisms... nothing about him says "classy".

So who is really Vincent ?

This is a great question! I’m afraid I don’t know enough about present day Swedish fashion and social cues to really get a sense of what’s going on with Vincent’s looks and behavior. He and August do present differently enough that I wonder what’s being communicated with each of them. It’s possible Vincent’s styling is more classy within his cultural context! But I don’t know enough to say anything precisely.

I can say from my own experience in interacting with rich teenage boys that in their day to day fashion, their “teenage boy” side comes out more than their “rich kid” side. They’re still wearing t-shirts and sweatpants they’re going to play soccer in, it’ll just be a nicer brand and all new clothing, instead of hand-me-downs from a sibling or something. And they’ll have all the on-trend clothing items instead of maybe one on-trend thing they got for a present plus whatever was affordable. For more formal occasions, we do see Vincent dress up more, so we know there’s a difference in his everyday fashion versus his more formal fashion.

That said, I am saying this solely from an American perspective, and I recognize that things may well be different in other countries. Again, it might be helpful for a Swede or someone from the Nordic region to weigh in on in this.

One other thing I’ve wondered about is the source of August’s clothing. For a while I’ve headcanoned that a lot of his clothes used to belong to his father. We know for sure that the white jacket he wears in 3.5 was his father’s, and it would make sense to me if some of his sweaters shirts etc used to be Carl Johan’s, especially when it comes out that the Horn family has no more money. Hence a lot more “classic” and “old money aesthetic” pieces in August’s wardrobe and less the stuff you associate with teenage boys. (If a lot of August’s clothing used to belong to his dad, does that mean horrendous fashion items from the 80s and 90s by any chance? This remains to be seen!)

It’s also worth noting that character-wise, August wants to be seen as mature and responsible and an adult, whereas Vincent seems to be more comfortably teenage and is happy at times to play the class clown (however much he also envies August and sees him as a rival in leadership roles.) I think their outfits reflect that aspect of their characterization, so there is also that.

Anyone have any other thoughts?

[beardedmrbean]

Oh I mean when I say do leftists see history as a Disney cartoon because how they talk about people

“Indigenous people wouldn’t do that to their native lands!” Well that because most tribes learn from the mistakes of their ancestors, like modern American farming-

Holy shit Dave is right that they never left their metropolis area

But there this complaints how geeks spaces don’t want black people in it

Black activists: Why don’t white people want us in it?!

Me: Every since we somehow switch from racial equality to black supremacy

Hmm what we done in media? Oh yeah let start in black Panther where

1. They made a oversized shantytown with different African cultures, many of which hate each other guts

2. Expect to believe that everyone with sympathies with the main antagonist, now the movie did point out Killmonger was a hypocrite because he took a mask that didn’t belong to wakandans because he felt like it. And did the exact things he bitch about white colonizers to Wakanda

Though the irony is that Killmonger represents a lot of bitter black supremacists with a pan Africa fetish

Oh oh fantasy, my Indian friend pointed out that the issued with modern fantasy is that they are using a post mayflower American structure vs any form of feudalism

Because my chimera republic made realize it more easier to create black fantasy characters in a colonial and beyond world like ones based off George Carver or Bass Revees

Also like that black elf in rings of power and black Aragon, the problem to me that they look like larpers especially the black elf

Pssst modern Hollywood hairstylists, the fade was a post ww2 thing black men started after vets return from duty, so it automatically stick out for most black people

Also if you want to use Middle Ages hairstyles for black characters. Just go to the tribes that exist as many hairstyles we use today are thousands of years old and if you stretch it to the 13 century you have enough resources for reference

Actually someone pointed out that lot of fantasy places have LA demographic structure, this got me thinking and I’m paraphrasing

Who more bigoted?

My countryhick West Virginia friend who gave me a lot of insight on American history including my people and you who help me try to research west African cultures like the Yoruba?

Or the colored hair, glasses, usually upper middle class feminists that rarely interact with non whites unless they’re genetrifed and lived in gated communities?

Keep in mind a lot of them write or influence current fantasy stuff

Oh I mean when I say do leftists see history as a Disney cartoon because how they talk about people “Indigenous people wouldn’t do that to their native lands!” Well that because most tribes learn from the mistakes of their ancestors, like modern American farming- Holy shit Dave is right that they never left their metropolis area

Not all of them, but for the most part ya, it's respect for the land created after generations of learning that it's important to respect the land, with a additional healthy sized dose of religion and remembering to thank the land and everything else that provides for their needs.

"Noble Savage" is the term you're looking for there, "soft bigotry of lowered expectations" is another one you'll see a lot and not just for natives.

Low hanging fruit in Berkeley talking about why voter ID laws are bad and racist because black people may not know how to get one, or be able to afford one, or even get to the dmv.

Forever funny

But there this complaints how geeks spaces don’t want black people in it

Geek spaces are welcoming and inclusive, they just want you to geek out with them and not start trying to force changes, I honestly don't blame some people for gatekeeping their hobbies. People are coming in and demanding changes to fit their sensibilities and what not and when they're done the 'space' completely different.

That and all the other stuff you mentioned as well.

The question to ask is, why are you in this particular fan space if you are going to change 80% of it, can you maybe just make your own instead?

Oh oh fantasy, my Indian friend pointed out that the issued with modern fantasy is that they are using a post mayflower American structure vs any form of feudalism Because my chimera republic made realize it more easier to create black fantasy characters in a colonial and beyond world like ones based off George Carver or Bass Revees

Look up the show Firefly, if you don't already know about it. There's two really good SciFi western tv shows and neither of them are Westworld, the one besides Firefly is The Adventures of Briscoe County Jr. and it's there in my list because it stars Bruce Campbell.

Which actually you might give that one a look too,

Keep forgetting how much of a giant Julius Carry was, it's got a lot of steampunk elements and it's funny as heck.

Mentioning Bass Reeves made me think of that.

Also like that black elf in rings of power and black Aragon, the problem to me that they look like larpers especially the black elf ECT

Never saw the show, but everything I did see told me they had zero respect for the source material so I didn't expect respect for anything else to appear.

Hair thing we have current year references that since as you said, they haven't really changed them up much in the last few thousand years.

Who more bigoted? My countryhick West Virginia friend who gave me a lot of insight on American history including my people and you who help me try to research west African cultures like the Yoruba? Or the colored hair, glasses, usually upper middle class feminists that rarely interact with non whites unless they’re genetrifed and lived in gated communities?

I'm sure you already know the answer. As a generalization at least.

The joke about internet racists being a tolerant group of people, 'they don't care what race you are so long as you're racist' actually pans out to be fairly true a lot of the time.

Granted a lot of them aren't actually terribly racist, they just like to be able to rip on each other and like doing it Eric Cartman style, le edgy people.

The "Anti-racists" are the ones to watch out for, that's the people from berkeley in that video up there.

It's performative for them, look at how tolerant and accepting I am.

Like this.

I know it's what you want there my whatever you are, but there's a multitude of reasons why this

won't be happening, but I'm sure you've managed to take great strides in the effort to eradicate racism and didn't just totally become a joke for millions of people of all colours.

Except maybe this creature

I love how that's become a insult to people for some reason, she just called him a individual thinker and is mad because he doesn't support the hive mind.

Granted any positive accomplishment in the black community is greeted with several different cheers about how they all share in that accomplishment, but when bad shit happens all of a sudden we're not a monolith.

That's human psychology tho so not much more to expect from that honestly.

Multimillionaire tv host saying she's oppressed and that black people can't make it in the US will forever be funny to me, also sad because that sentiment is holding people back by saying things like that, since it's discouraging, why should I try if I've got no chance to make it anyhow.

May as well just get mine any way I can or maybe lay down and give up.

[munsster]

Hiii I just found your page and I love it!! Could you maybe do headcanons for Eddie dating a reader with a wealthy family? Tysm 😁

eddie with a wealthy s/o

A/N: oh and reader SPOILS him and he’s like a confused puppy about it

Warnings: fluff, wealthy!reader, kissing, gift-giving, tipsy driving (DONT DO IT 🤬), PDA, bribing dustin, pet names (bug, baby)

he had no idea ur family was THAT upper class

not that you’re avoiding the topic, but whenever you’re deciding who’s place to hang at, he always beats you to the punch

plus his bed is rlly comfy soooo

how could you refuse??

anyway…

sure you dress nice & wear fancy jewelry most days

come to think of it, he supposes you are sorta preppy

and you drive a brand new car

you also pay for most of the meals, tipping upwards of 40%—unless of course the waiter was an asshole, then they get around 20%

what really shocked him is when you paid for everyone’s meal that one time they all went out to a diner after an especially grueling campaign

maybe he just didn’t consider your finances a huge factor in… anything really

he still doesn’t

but you invited him to a gala and it all became a little clearer

btw the gala was hosted at a mf country club and on the way there eddie kept asking you over and over if he looked nice enough (he did)

he was WORRIED

he put his hair up and even wore a pretty baby blue dress shirt and tie

you kept chuckling a little at his nerves because he’d be like “hmmshsmshjs is this okay???? should i take off my watch??? please, bug, you gotta help me out”

you’d think you were dying with how hurried and panicked he was speaking

but you just reached over and held his hand and gave him a kiss on the cheek, whispering sweetly

“they’re gonna love you” + “you look beautiful” + “nothin’ to worry about” + “you should put your hair up more. suits you” + “you’re cute when you blush”

and he’s simply melting into the praise

the whole night, the two of you are attached at the hip

he’s so nervous with his ringed fingers gently cradling the flute of bubbly you snuck him

you were right; everybody loves eddie

you’re just smiling next to him, holding his hand while he chats up the golf dads and housewives dressed to the nines

he collects a couple business cards and is flushed pink after his third glass

he definitely gets roped into a golf game with one of the neighborhood dads after he talked himself up a bit too much (with no help from you)

“he’s an excellent shot!!!” you chirp, knowing full well eddie has never golfed in his life—then promptly whisper an “i’ll teach you” against his ear

you get so excited when the orchestra—yes, orchestra—starts to play

and eddie HAS to drag you onto the dancefloor

how can he not??? you look beautiful

and the ladies on the sidelines hoot and holler when eddie lays a big ol’ kiss on you

oh to be young and in love *sigh*

aNYWAYS

you take him to your house afterwards and he is in awe at the steadily increasing size of the houses as his lil old van trundles through your gated community

hello???? is that a mansion?????

“technically, it’s a McMansion, eddie baby”

“technically” he huffs out turning on to your twinkly street lined with about a dozen american flags

“talk about old money”

and you just smile at him and drag him up the —long ass—driveway with a grin

“isn’t it gorgeous?” “oh, bug, you know nothin’s more gorgeous than—holy shit is that a crystal chandelier????” “wait till you see the pool”

and there’s a marble floor and a winding staircase and a shit ton of angel statues

and the upstairs is even crazier with like white carpet—shoes are left downstairs—and a fuckin’ intercom system

“EDDIE EDDIE—wait okay, stay here and i’ll be right back” and he’s just standing in your room twiddling his thumbs when he hears

“ksh-kksh—i feel the need……. the need for speed….. do you copy, eddie???” in your deepest and gravelliest operator voice

coming from a speaker. in the wall.

and then you hop back in the room with this huge smile and he’s flabbergasted

basically, you let him wear some silk pajamas and you share your $300 skincare routine with him

and the whole time he’s sitting pretty and so confused

then he’s just laying on your round bed with a canopy and looking at you like how did i not know you were rich???

tbh he was rlly ignoring the signs for a hot minute

oh my god your bed is insanely comfortable

you scare the shit out of him when you hop out of bed with a gasp

he is SO concerned

but you walk back in the room with a cute little gift bag

he’s already pampered and smelling like vanilla, what else could there be—

the bag is labeled GUCCI?????

goddamn bro what is this day

but you hand him the bag all excited and like what is he supposed to do

so he unwraps the little black box and opens it and inside is this dainty little necklace with a heart charm

awwWWW

but like “c’mon, i can’t accept this….”

“PLEEEEEEASE????”

and you always win him over with that pout

and he’ll always call you a brat for it

so you help him clasp it on and he looks so pretty

“mama called while you were in the bathroom!” “and what did mama say?” “well, she said they’d be at the four seasons tonight” “jesus—” “and that they wanna invite you on our trip to LA—” “—christ” “…...’s that a ‘no’?” “nO!!!”

after that, you do not stop spoiling him

as much as he is reluctant to accept your gifts, he can’t shy away from a good leather jacket

people being so confused when you step out together

and you literally are not paying attention to their looks

awh but eddie is and he holds your waist a little tighter when he gets self-conscious

and you just stop him in the middle of the sidewalk and give him a kiss

him willingly holding all your bags when you go out shopping

“can i carry that for you????” “eddie baby, you already have 6–” “i can do it”

you basically being corroded coffin’s little manager: flirting to land gigs, finding them a good label, buying them new equipment when something breaks (or when they want shiny new amps), sleeping with the front man

eddie’s pretty sure gift giving is your love language because lord knows you don’t need much else, but when he gives you his favorite ring

oh boy, it’s all over

total waterworks, definitely

you always asking him for style advice

and rarely listening

“leopard print or floral” “hmmm…. leopard print” “both it is!!”

taking him and his friends to chicago and basically paying for everything

and they’re like holy shit, you’re made of money

and you do get a little shy at the praise

but his friends love you

and they did before you blew a shit ton of money on them

and it made eddie nervous the whole time

but you always reassure him it’ll be okay

and you’re worried he thinks of you different now that he knows

“you don’t think i’m… i dunno, pretentious?” “not even close, bug. think you’ve got a knack for shopping, though” “oh, stoppppp”

the gang thinks the amount you two display affection (to put it gently) is ‘gross’

you do a lot of sitting in his lap and general cuddling

mostly, you’re all over each other

and one time dustin would not stop ragging on eddie for making out with you at the carnival

and eddie just calls dustin a ‘twerp’ while you hand him a fifty and smile

he never mentioned it again

you definitely drag eddie to many more galas

and art galleries and the opera and horse racing and your beach house????

BUT in return, he takes you to his metal concerts and you join in on his D&D campaigns

don’t get him wrong….

he appreciates the financial security of it all, but obviously it’s a new feeling

sometimes it makes him a little frustrated to see someone with so much disposable income

especially growing up in a trailer park

it’s just different, you know???

so you let him pay for dinner when he asks

and he learns to understand you love spoiling him

and you learn to understand that he doesn’t love it all the time

but he really loves you

even when he has enough shiny things for a lifetime

he’s always considering just one more

and this time, it’ll come in a little velvet box

“love you, eds!” “love you, richie rich” “hey”

masterlist

[amuseoffyre]

Despite the number of times I’ve watched the show now, something just hit me from episode one. When Stede’s getting the crew kitted up to fool the English, he casts Pete as “Lord Peter Gravelstone, minor royalty from Essex” and describes the white crew members as a bunch of “upper crust lads”.

Not Mister. Not even just ‘Sir’. He tried to pretend they were actual nobility.

I’ve blathered on before about Stede’s place in the class hierarchy in relation to the Badmintons and the British Naval officers (ie. he’s new-money gentry, but they’re mostly aristocracy, which means he’s barely above trade for them) and hooboy, the fact that he basically ranks up his companions in order to outclass the Badmintons is either a ballsy or a desperate move.

Stede is an easy target for anyone who is legit aristocracy for many reasons, but especially as a jolly jump-up from the colonies. By seating a Lord at his table as one of his passengers/travelling companions, maybe he thought it would provide a buffer, but every single one of the Naval crew takes one look at those unconvincing muppets and they know these aren’t aristocrats. And even if they were, any aristocrat would probably laugh along with Nigel and Company at this bumpkin and his bumpkin friends.

[divinekangaroo]

WIP: a honeymoon fic teaser for @deliciousnutcomputer for such patience :)

tommy x lizzie; drinking/inebriation, friction, very unreliable (drunk) narrator XD

(it might not seem it but this one will have the most terribly sweet ending i can possibly imagine)

Day 1:

5:00 PM: Arrive at Victoria Embankment in London to board the Orient Express. 6:00 PM: Departure from London towards Dover. Enjoy dinner in the dining car. Socialise in the lounge and bar cars.  Live music and conversation. Admire the passing countryside and towns as the train continues its journey. During the evening, compartments will be prepared for sleeping with the seating converted into luxury beds.

*

‘There’s fingerprints.’

Lizzie looked up from her plate. Quail at perfect moistness, green peppercorn. Some kind of broccoli sliced into the thinnest of curls, transparent as if green glass, or a museum’s pressed dissection of a small tree. Never particularly been intrigued by the idea of matching wine to meal, one of those things the upper classes pretended was real but wasn’t just to create another barrier, Lizzie learned otherwise: something about the way the white wine, selected for her meal especially, that made everything taste so much better. Hadn’t been the first sip, but layered, as if taste was something that could build over time, acquired, and she was in the thick of complementary layered bliss on her tongue right now. 

The green-eyed sommelier explained it to her with a masculine grace and an attention she’d felt warmly gratified by, as he’d seemed to recognise instantly Tommy wouldn’t pay attention, and instead poured his French-accented charm onto her instead. She’d listened, rapt, and drank everything he gave her.

As if giving a toast, Tommy raised his tumbler to the burnished chandeliers that gave the dining car such atmosphere, frowning.

‘See?  Fingerprints.’

‘Are they your fingerprints?’

‘Course they’re not mine. Look, there’s specks of dirt in this glass.’

‘Tommy.’

Now he was sniffing the contents. ‘Is this scotch? Taste it for me. They’ve given me scotch. In someone else’s fucking unwashed glass.’

‘Can you please get your glass out of my face—’

‘Where’s this bar car? I’m not taking this.’

How was she supposed to know if he didn’t? ‘Given there’s only two directions you could possibly go, I’m sure you’ll find it.’

Tommy gave her an unreadable look, untucked his chair, and stalked out the back end of the dining car, holding the glass out as if it was some dripping bloody organ. Then he hit his shoulder on the doorframe as he passed and paused to glare at it.  

Lizzie looked at her plate to avoid seeing if he'd start a fight with mostly inanimate architecture. She ate another careful mouthful of quail with a slice of broccoli folded onto the gold fork by way of the gold knife. There were still three forks and three knives on the table next to her plate, and three spoons in different sizes arranged at the top of the gold-rimmed plate. She assumed one set had been for the prawn thing in the glasses Tommy waved away before the waiters could approach their table, which she forgave because a disgust for shellfish couldn’t be argued with; another for the soup course he’d looked at and sent back without checking with her, which she didn’t forgive when she’d not even the chance to see what it was. But she wasn’t sure about the final cutlery set because it wasn’t meant for dessert, was it?  

She'd lost her taste for sweet things, anyway. Now she would never know.

Five minutes later, Tommy crossed through again to exit to the front of the car, still holding the offending glass, giving her a passing frown.

Lizzie looked at his plate, steak with the slightest blush of pink at the centre; she could tell because he’d sliced it thin as the broccoli, precisely, end to end, complaining it wasn’t cooked through, didn’t they know uncooked meat gave people worms or worse, he’d had better from a gutted squirrel at a fucking street stall grilled over charcoal on a stick. He’d pushed all the potatoes off the plate in the process of his slicing, exactly like Charlie at his petulant worst, staining the tablecloth.  

Having drained her glass of impeccably selected white wine staring at his plate, Lizzie waved the waiter over to fill her up again. The couple at the table next to her looked at her, not exactly aghast, but politely puzzled. Possibly you weren’t supposed to click repeatedly at a waiter like that in first class. Possibly you weren’t supposed to even call them. Maybe it was all done through some strange set of social signals no one was allowed to explain, because you had to be born into it. 

No one seemed to stare at Tommy like that no matter what he did, though, so men must have a free pass. Either that or he’d found a better book of etiquette than she ever had and not deigned to share.

‘You might as well leave the bottle. Are you allowed to do that?’

‘Of course, madam.’

‘Ta. Thank you, I mean. Thank you.’

‘At your service, madam.’ From the cow-eyes, he looked like he wanted to kiss the back of her hand. Surely that wasn’t reasonable? Lizzie looked away, slightly disturbed, and the couple at the table across offered her near-identical conciliatory smiles, sweetly, which made her realise they weren’t a couple but rather brother and sister, and that was perhaps an invitation to participate in some of that much lauded social conversation listed on their itinerary.

In the corner of the car, on a small elevated triangular stage, a trio of young violinists set up quietly. Two women with hair piled high in identical crowns-of-braids and one man, dark skinned.  At some unseen cue, they all began to play, ethereal and compelling. Lizzie thought distantly of Charlie’s practice, wondered if he’d keep his attention on it long enough to become this good.  Violins were amazing instruments. Having mostly filled her days and a good few nights of marriage so far with various entertainments now available to her, including orchestral performances, Lizzie had decided violins might be her favourite. Not just because of Charlie, but because even his faltering practice made the instrument sound almost human in some way, even if with him it was more crying than singing. Now, in the hands of masters, the instruments pulled her into another place where baby new potatoes weren’t rocking gently on the tablecloth with the motion of the train.

Frisson, that’s what it was. Lifting her from the mundanity of having endured without comment the now hours-long litany of Mr Thomas Shelby’s complaints of raw steak and dirty glasses and the station queues and the traffic on the way in and how could she forget her fucking passport all while pretending he hadn’t forgotten his and the stupid imperfect and fundamentally flawed itinerary the latest useless office lackey put together for this whole affair, the crammed luggage and the lack of information on the weather that would be awaiting them so they couldn’t even pack clothes properly as if he'd ever wear anything other than a bloody three-piece in public and the time this would take away from important business and she’d better be happy and why France, Lizzie, why fucking France, when he’d been the one who picked it—

Nothing was left in the bottle. Lizzie realised it was late enough the car was nearly empty, offending plate and potatoes cleared, and she was almost liquid in her chair, suddenly conscious of how she must look. Eyes half-lidded, face soft, listening and looking, free hand curled at her chest as if wounded, and a total degradation of posture.

The young violinist caught Lizzie’s eye and winked at her, inclined his head so briefly towards the rear end of the car. A lifted eyebrow, in enquiry and offering. He put an extra little effort into his bow arm, the tilt of his chin, and held her eye in a particularly meaningful way.

‘Do you want to fuck me,’ Lizzie asked the empty chair opposite her, jarring and vicious and in her poshest attempt at the King’s English.

The chair didn’t answer.

Then she went to find the bar car or her bed, whatever showed up first in the grand linear journey that was navigating a train where apparently everyone except for her husband actually did, in fact, want to fuck her, blaming her sway and the nearly-rolled ankle along the way on the motion of the carriage.

[gogandmagog]

On the subject of Gog and Magog.

No, because I’m actually peeing. Look what came today. Live from 1880, a non-reproduction original set of… well, Gog and Magog’s.

Some (most? many?) AoGG book readers will remember Gog and Magog, two of my especial favorite (okay, obviously) characters (and they are characters) from the series, first appearing in Anne of the Island.

“(…) and just behind each sat a large white china dog, with round green spots all over it, a green nose and green ears.”

—Anne of the Island, by LM Montgomery

Anne regards them as the ‘twin deities of Patty’s Place,’ and Miss Patty Spofford mentions in the retelling of their history that they are over 100 years old. Anne takes such a fancy to them that Miss Patty eventually parts with Gog and Magog, and gives them to Anne as a wedding gift. (Let’s remember here one of Ms Patty’s most iconic lines, “We send you our best wishes. Maria and I have never married, but we have no objection to other people doing so.”) Thereafter they haunt the House of Dreams mantle, and make dozens of appearances throughout the series. Anne speaks to them like they’re living creatures when she’s alone, Captain Jim calls them the “cutest little cusses” and bows goodnight, and Leslie, in her hours of discontent, fantasizes about ‘banging their noses together.’

Gog and Magog are Staffordshire dogs that were wildly popular in the Victorian era (the first pair were fashioned after Queen Victoria’s beloved spaniels), amongst the upper middle class, as both window and mantle decorations. They come in a variety of colors and sizes, there’s literally a Staffordshire set for all tastes. The spicier girlies that put theirs in their home windows would even change the dogs’ positions to indicate to their sneaky links that their husband wasn’t at home.

Gog and Magog were also impossibly dear and nostalgic to the author L.M. Montgomery. Her grandfather owned the original Gog and Magog (LMM was “enthralled” with them as a child), and Montgomery’s father often made up stories about them to amuse her. The most frequent legend had it that Gog and Magog came alive at the stroke of midnight, and that they’d jump down from the mantle and run the room. Having always “hankered to possess a similar pair,” on her honeymoon in England (where the dogs all originate), Montgomery sought a pair of green spotted dogs, like those her family had owned; she wrote in her journal that “the race of dogs with green spots seems to have become extinct,” (I had Google, so my efforts were all the easier) so she ‘settled’ for white and gold pair, as pictured below.

These two of Montgomery’s are now housed at the University of Guelph, in the Archival & Special Collections Department. They are on display! The original gangster Gog of Montgomery’s childhood met an accident long ago and is no longer with us, but the original Magog is still owned by Montgomery descendants.

“You will not have forgotten that Gog looks to the right and Magog to the left.”

—Anne’s House of Dreams, by LM Montgomery

[illgiveyouahint]

As much as I loved s2, one thing that bothers me is their treatment or rather non-treatment of the racial and ethnic dynamics when it comes to privilege. You know that Felice, Simon and even Alexander would be treated differently IRL. We've seen how everyone treated Meghan Markle, so let's not pretend that swedish royalty/upper-class is any better.

There were opportunities to explore it more. Felice in s1 and how she was straightening her hair and trying to appease her white mother's wishes vs her getting her hair done at the black-owned salon at the beginning of s2. Her mom wanting her to be Lucia because it's a family tradition (which is very much a white woman tradition). Simon with his darker skin vs his light skinned sister. Alexander and the way everyone always treats him like the disposable person they can pin anything on. Those were all things they could delve into more in depth, but they never did. Especially with Felice it is really disappointing because in s1 I thought maybe that's where they're heading but unfortunately no. I just think it's such a shame. We always have these films and tv shows that focus on either class or race/ethnicity, but rarely do we have media that truly focused on the intersection of the two.

[homebody-nobody]

i just came to the realization that kiaras parents might think jj is the guy she slept with on the season 2 speech. not pope. i don’t think kie even mentioned pope to her parents since their relationship was never official. anna looked at jj weird when kiara said they spent the night at the wreck (pope wasn’t there so i assume she thought just him and kie) and overall i would assume they’re in a relationship already so if get to some flashback on something for s4 i would assume kies parents are not even surprised by them being together but more like they saw it coming eventually which is why mike was projecting hardcore on him

NO NO NO BECAUSE HERE'S THE THING OKAY

my friends and I POSTULATED that Kie's parents would assume that JJ was the one she slept with in season two, ESPECIALLY given the ~passive-aggressive~ 'good to see you mr and mrs carrera!' when Kie gets in the truck to go to charleston, like, that was standing, we thought that already

bUT I HADN'T YET CONNECTED IT TO THE SEASON THREE STUFF!!

nonnie, you're a genius. OF COURSE mike would be freaking the fuck out and HARDCORE projecting on JJ -- Kie's parents ALREADY FUCKING THINK THEY'RE TOGETHER!! And, ofc, because they're kie's parents, they're not gonna do anything easy and simple like, idk, fucking ask, so instead they get all mean and Upper-Middle-Class White People on him. (sorry Mike but it's established you're not down with the crew) (also I am entitled to specify that vibe because *I* grew up an Upper-Middle-Class White People before I learned about CRT and systemized racism in college)(before that I was def more white-liberal) (anyway)

also NEVER made it back to the season one connection of 'we spent the night at the wreck' moment. omg????? fucking OF COURSE mike and anna think jj and kie are together!! I really hope the pates did that on purpose and it wasn't all coincidental little things that we pick up on and the forget lmao

[toadallytickles]

Got to celebrate Valentine’s Day early and all weekend at the Super Bowl tickle gathering!! Tons of fun as always! ❤️🏈

- Clay and I did everything we wanted to do this weekend! Like playing with certain people! Meeting friends in-person for the first time! I watched my very first Super Bowl game!

- We also met a few fans of our content! That’s always super flattering and awesome! Happy we met some of you!! 🥰

- I was quite switchy this weekend, usually I lee, but this time I equally lee’d and Ler’d~. Definitely have special cravings for certain tickle boys hng~. 🍽️

- Got to be switchy with someone I usually play with at gatherings.. I love being tickled by them.. but wrestling them and tickle-dominating them was so much fun too.. especially when they’re bigger than you…. Their reactions .. so fueling unf im feral… I also got to introduce them to the position where their wrists are cuffed behind my back, so I have easy access to a ton of upper body spots~. 🥴💦

- also we got walked in on while they were sitting on my back tickling me ….. 🥴🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤💦 i love being caught~

- then Clay and them GANG TICKLED ME WHILE I WAS HIGH EEE!! (〃˘▽˘ ʃƪ)*:・ﾟ✧♡ (even tho I was actually really shy and embarrassed about this like it was so gross omg like 🙄 let’s not remember this please)

- A c t u a l l y, I Ler’d more than lee’d.. Clay got tipsy Friday night, I was high. He was curled up in blankets and I just felt like being mean to him 1. because I can, 2. I knew he wouldn’t and couldn’t fight back, so I tickled him into this ticklish lil ball.. he was extremely ticklish to light tickles.. his laughter was so high-pitched and giggly.. so funny, I couldn’t stop laughing at him and torturing him~ 🤭❤️

- oh yeah we found out there was a dispensary nearby so we got edibles~ :)c

- I somehow found the confidence to wear 2 different crop tops (in one day lol).. very shy about that but I got a lot compliments~ :)c ❤️

- And then no one can do anything more embarrassing during a session than me now, I’m still cry-laughing about it honestly: Clay and I were playing, he already made me cum once and then was overstimulating me with the Hitachi.. I have an amazing second orgasm but I wet-fart basically in his face during it, and then I actually squirt unexpectedly but it’s just yellow against the white hotel sheets (and I wasn’t drinking enough water) .. so I pretty much peed the bed…. our session ended after that LMAOO, but we’re both laughing, and Clay’s glad I’m laughing instead of crying. I clean myself up and then Ler him~. On the drive home, I think about how much of a green flag that is in our relationship and as play partners. Anyone else, I’d be mortified. But with Clay, it’s hysterical and now another fun memory~.

- Lastly, I’m just really happy with how this gathering turned out for me because I could apply my growth and what I have learned at past events and kink classes to curate my experience! It’s been a lot easier navigating kink communities when you know yourself, your boundaries, and what you’re looking for~. 🥰

[rwwinton]

So I’m thinking about Ghosts and how much it warms my heart to see all the growth each of the ghosts has been doing. They’re all doing some growth by this point, but I was especially hit by Hetty chipping away at her late-1800s worldview, especially regarding her place as an upper-class white woman. And Isaac’s line where he says “right, I don’t have to pretend anymore” when he starts agreeing with Trevor and Sas about the cult girl being hot definitely hit way harder than a simple comedy line should have. Those two occupied an in-between period in history, where older ghosts like Thor and Sas had no overbearing Christianity-based society to live under (we know Sas died before colonization got rolling), and the ghosts who are less old, like Alberta and Flower, knew what society expected of them and weren’t exactly playing by all of the rules. (Pete and Trevor are a different story because they were more or less living by what was expected of them as straight white men.) 

But Hetty lived at a time when women didn’t have great rights. They were expected to just be okay with whatever their husbands wanted and not to think for themselves. As you can see by her costume covering her entire body, they weren’t permitted to engage with their own sexuality without being labeled negatively. And Isaac lived at a time where being a man who was sexually attracted to other men was something that, if publicly known, could ruin someone’s reputation or even be punished severely by law. And he definitely could jeopardize his career in the army. There were ways around the repercussions, of course, by being very careful and quiet about things, and often by marrying and “pretending” like Isaac has been for over 250 years. 

Something about watching those very old and very ingrained internal beliefs and societal fears slowly falling away from these characters is just great. I love to see them slowly adapting.

[knighteclipsed]

♡ heh.

send me a ♡ and i’ll make up a fankid (feeling like taking a few more low-key)

another long post what it do chat

Profile

Name: Ronin(? that’s what they call themself at least)

Gender: NB (amab, they/she)

Class: Swordmaster

A mysterious wanderer with extraordinary skills in swordsmanship. Emerging suddenly and without explanation, no one can seem to trace their origins back to the source.

Appearance and Personality

They prefer to keep their face hidden, but at the very minimum, they don’t seem to have any facial hair. Through the white veil they carry over their visage, one can also note light blue hair—it’s a bit ash-colored though. How interesting!

Beyond that though, they’re a well-spoken individual, albeit with a few eccentricities. At times, their speech will sound extremely feminine, while at others, astonishingly neutral. There doesn’t seem to be a pattern to this—perhaps she just finds it fun?

Similarly, she doesn’t seem to be hindered at all by the fact that her eyes are always covered. (This comes as a surprise to many, but in modern terms: she is actually legally blind!) Will sometimes use their sword to feel out the ground before them, but mostly relies on the blobs of color they can see, and especially—smells, sounds, and their sense of touch.

Doesn’t seem to be someone who is governed by morality—they’re a person with no ties, aimlessly wandering from place to place and finding whatever interests them there. Once that intrigue is gone, so too do they vanish. It is so sudden and so complete that one may wonder if they were ever there to begin.

While they’re here though, they can be quite the entertainer! They carry with them lots of information from Hoshido, Nohr, and beyond, and they’re willing to share it—if it serves them, of course. The lucky few can get information for nothing at all, but most will have to fight them and hope to win the match.

History

Went by a different name in youth, but at this point, very few know what it is—or if they do, they do not know Ronin. (Those two lives are kept very separate.) They were always one with a bit of wanderlust, interested in meeting the world and learning all of its secrets—once she turned eighteen, she merely vanished from her household. None have been able to track her down since—it is impressive, to be frank.

This younger self however often found themself surrounded by servants due to their blindness, and though this was not unwelcome, it did leave them with a taste for learning their own limits. Was all the same trained to hold their own in a fight, and they carry this prowess with them still.

It is rather convenient though that she is the younger of the two royal siblings! (It would’ve been quite disastrous had the heir to the throne vanished overnight…) She never did grow too strong of an opinion on anything, instead choosing to drift through life without stressing out too much; she also isn’t the type to grow attached to others very easily, but that isn’t really her fault though, is it? If they wanted to stick around, they ought to follow her when she travels!

It’s not that hard, really.

Combat

They fashion themself to be a swordfighter primarily, having honed that blade since youth and sharpened it with the knowledge of foreign lands—that said, they’re rather fond of magic and its utility as well! Though they have no magical talent of their own whatsoever, they aren’t against using fancy tricks to get the upper hand in combat.

They’re the type to learn the sound of their allies’ footsteps so as to recognize them when they are approaching—and when they are fighting. Doesn’t fare so well against mounted combatants, but can use their nose for strong personal scents, and—they can always speak! (Most do not know they are blind, but can assume inability to recognize as a result of their obscured eyes.)

I imagine a personal skill of theirs would be like Saizo’s, but rather than dealing damage, they’d create a small fog of war terrain on the battlefield post-combat. They’d be able to see through it just fine, but any allies would need directing, and their enemies would be hopelessly lost. Often uses this to make a quiet escape.

Summary

They’re a strange individual—sharp of senses and clever in humor, but otherwise unpredictable in mood and motive. They actually possess glasses for their blindness, but they’re so old that they are genuinely unhelpful—and further, they don’t like wearing them in the slightest. As a result, they are only worn in the mornings and nights when Ronin is in private, generally when doing precise work where simply squinting will not do (legal blindness, recall).

Gets along best with those they find interesting—some may be as lax as they are, while others may be the most straight-laced of the bunch. If you have a secret, don’t be surprised if things start to go missing around you (they can’t actually see what's most useful during their snooping, so they just take whatever and check in private—it’s a problem, not that they mind). The sort to collect tokens of their travels and treat others to them as a gift for the eyes. (Note: They may not actually be a gift for the eyes.)

The map where they are recruited would be located in a forest—the player’s main objective could be anything really, because Ronin wouldn’t involve herself with it. Instead, a character would have to go over and ask her to join, being completed one of two ways:

Have someone ‘interesting’ talk to Ronin (there is no pattern to know, but this group would probably include the MC). They’ll join simply because they’re intrigued.

Have someone ‘uninteresting’ talk to Ronin (again: no pattern). The conversation will involve talk of help beating the enemy, and Ronin will join because they’re bored.

They’ll be nested pretty deep into the woods, however, so missing their recruitment is very easy, especially since, after five turns, they’ll get bored and leave. One who is interested in very little.

If made to fight them, Ronin would have unique dialogue with her parents, but it would mostly be dodging the fact that she is their kid. Generic-sounding in a way, but also betraying a familiarity with the person she is speaking with. Even if she is not recognized, she would still pay respect before and after the battle.

Both a boku and atashi user, simply for the fun of it.

[alovelyburn]

I’m quite happy to see no one tried to kill me over that post about comparing Japanese and American uses of the Griffith character type. Not that I thought it was offensive, but I’m always a little wary of generalizations and assumptions based on personal experience and anecdotes rather than more objective/generalized data.

But I can’t help it. I think about how cultural differences influence the creation and perception of media a lot....

it’s just an interesting topic. And I am, myself, a child of multiple cultures as my mother is a japanese immigrant, my father was southern-born African-American and I was raised in a working class PoC-majority neighborhood but went to school at upper middle class white-majority schools for most of my childhood.

So I have this child-of-an-immigrant thing going on that I’m sure some of you understand very well  - this thing where you’re raised half in one culture and half in another. It’s a little more complicated/involved than that, but I’m not trying to bang on about myself so I guess I’m saying, I’m hyper aware of these rifts between the different cultures that I grew up a part of, not just the Japanese vs. American thing, but class divides and American racial divides...

Culture is one of those invisible things that colors everything you see and how you interpret it and even if you’re aware of that, it’s not always easy to pick apart your culturally-embedded viewpoints from objective reality. This includes a lot of moral issues and perspectives on social issues, but also like just basic... understandings of reality and self-definition.

So, going back to media, in fairness it’s not all culture - I do think fans in general can be prone to perceiving things they want to happen as happening even when they aren’t... especially when they’ve invested a lot of their online identity and their enjoyment of a series on that thing happening or being true. And of course people are infamously reluctant to change their beliefs when confronted with facts and logic that disprove their opinions. But I think these cultural schisms do tend to make it worse since the work is much more likely to be trying to say something that isn’t even on a given reader’s radar since that’s not something they’ve been media-trained to see or expect.

This is also involved in, for example, how so many manga or anime stories feel like they’re losing track of their pacing to western viewers/readers (google kishotenketsu sometime if you don’t know), as well as things like why the endings of stories sometimes feel anticlimactic or unsatisfying to a western viewer or reader. Both because Japanese stories have different ... themes/types of themes/lean on different tropes than say American stories, and because the same (or similar) types of characters or relationships play different roles in Japanese fiction than they do in American fiction, e.g. the Griffith thing.

One of the things I do a lot when I’m trying to understand where these schisms come from and how they play out is I’ll take a character and engage in the thought experiment implicit in the previous post - I ask myself, well, if I were watching an american fantasy movie or whatever and this character showed up or this situation arose, what would I expect to happen? And if the character did what they did in this manga, what would I expect the result of that to be? And that is very interesting and revealing - I recommend trying it sometime if you haven’t.

Anyway I personally try to interpret media more through the lens of the culture from which it arises - to the degree I can, like obviously there are cultures I know nothing about and can’t manage that with.

It’s also one of the reasons I think so much about authorial intent - there’s a lot of reasons really especially in ongoing work, but one of them is because I feel the need to try and take my preferences and, well, myself out of the equation as much as possible as a bit of a check against my own biases and assumptions.

[priestfrommidnightmass]

last night i got so scared and for some reason the only thing i found myself able to do was watch beastie boys interviews so i’m gonna allow myself to ramble about them for a second. i love how they do nothing but LIE like i’ve never learned a single thing from any interview abt them which is the sign of any great band. the licensed to ill interviews are always so fucking funny because the interviewers don’t know what to do with them and they certainly don’t know what to do with the interviewers. it’s always some old ass lady asking them the same questions along the lines of like So you guys are white. Do you know that? You guys all seem to come from upper middle class families (hardly questions) What’s the most evil thing you’ve ever done? Do you want everyone to die? while the guys sit looking like they’re going to kill themselves on camera the entire time. the answers they give are always so stupid but honestly they’re hardly more stupid than the questions themselves. one of my favorite moments from these interviews aren’t even then responding to any of these questions but a minuscule moment where adam is just sitting there doing nothing and yauch just whispers Stop. and he does! he does stop whatever it was he was doing. and then all post licensed to ill interviews they still look like they want to kill themselves all the time but the difference is they will not stop PLAYINGGGGG. they will lie nonstop. it’s also so funny when they let mike just start rambling about some utter nonsense for like two minutes and the other two just stare into space. all of their lying is funny especially when they do it together but by far the funniest lies always come from yauch because no matter what he’s saying i almost want to believe him because he’s so convincing. sorry i don’t know what i’m even talking about anymore i got a little lost i watched these for like a hundred hours last night and they’re so funny okay

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

EP22 - Tumblr Trans - with Helena Kerschner

Helena (age 23) identified as non-binary and transgender throughout her teenage years, transitioning with HRT from the age of 18 - 19 before detransitioning. In this episode, she reflects on the social and online influences that led her down the path to transition. 

Aaron Terrell: So we are hoping to talk about the cultural aspect of transgenderism or transgender ideology, and more like the social justice -- what we commonly know in academic circles as like queer theory, but as it's applied in more like online youth realms, more commonly known as basically like social justice theory, or a social justice framework, and how that's probably the primary driver in so much youth transition today, or even 20-something transition today. And Helena knows that stuff inside and out, so she has joined us to shed light so thank you very much

If you want to introduce yourself for the people who don't know you, which I doubt is anybody but, yeah, introduce yourself.

Helena: Well, if anyone has not seen me rabidly go off on the timeline yet, I'm a de-transitioned woman, I'm 23, and I started identifying as trans when I was 15 after getting very involved in Tumblr fandoms. And with that came obviously, the social justice stuff which I believe played just a huge, huge part in my trans identity and eventual decision to transition. When I was 18, I went on testosterone, and I was on testosterone for about 17 months before I desisted, and after I desisted I kind of identified as non-binary for a few months. And then eventually I just said.. I'm a girl. So, yeah, that's the short version of my story.

Aaron Terrell: It seems like for a lot of people, the non-binary identity is either kind of like sometimes an on-ramp or an off-ramp from full-on trans identification.

Helena: Yeah, and I think like, I know we'll definitely get into this more, but I think the reason for that is because when you're immersed in these social justice spaces, that's a very strict, almost like moral code with your peers that basically says that if you're privileged, then you're responsible for all of this pain and suffering and wrongdoing in the world. And for someone like me, who at the time was a cis, straight, white girl from a middle, upper-middle class upbringing, I felt a lot of guilt about all of this privilege that I had. And obviously you can't change your race, you can't change your sexuality, you can't change where your family comes from, but one thing that you can change is your pronouns. So it's really easy for girls who are in the situation - or boys too, I think especially boys, who are young, they're not socially adept - and they're faced with this very strict, kind of unforgiving moral framework. It's so easy to just to say "you know, I'm gonna try going by they/them pronouns" and then you get this positive feedback loop.

So, we'll probably talk more about that, but that's my opinion on on that.

Aaron Terrell: Well, we can even talk about it now. What I've noticed, slowly over the last few years, kind of clued into, is it's almost if you don't choose to identify as non-binary, it's almost like you're actively choosing to be an oppressor, to participate in these oppressive structures where you're on an upper ledge. It's almost like there's - it's so much farther beyond peer pressure - that you you feel compelled to adapt a trans identification in some way. And like you're saying, this is often people in your kind of demographic range: white people, typically middle or upper class, where you have this guilt, and this lack of an existing cultural kind of community to identify yourself with. And so it has this twofold appeal is that it comes with this sense of personal differentiation and a community to belong to, as well as getting you out of the oppressive class you exist in, if you're cis and straight.

Helena: Exactly, and I think teenagers are already in a state where they're so vulnerable to social rejection and so when you've already been rejected a lot of the times just for being more introverted, or more nerdy, or having autism, or being gay, anything like that - when you've already kind of been rejected from your in real life social circles, whether that's your community or your school, and then you seek refuge from that in these online spaces, and then you're hit with "once again we will reject you unless you change this, or unless you fit into this, some kind of oppressed group in some way.” Not that it's explicit, but it's very much the cis, straight, white people are the ones who are constantly the butts of very negative jokes. You'll get told, you have no right to speak on this, you have no right to be depressed or struggle with anything, because you're so privileged. And so I think that's an incredible incentive.

Aaron Terrell: There's a lot of cultural forces and incentives to adapting it, and then it seems like - and I don't think this was your experience as far as when you started testosterone, but something that I've seen that seems to be the case in a lot of that kind of understanding - is that transition is almost seen as  something that you do to demonstrate how committed you are to the trans moral code. It's not so much that you feel like there's a problem with your body that you need to fix, but more like by transitioning, it's like you're demonstrating a commitment to this moral code. Is that something that you saw?

Helena: I do relate to that, and I think it doesn't have to be mutually exclusive with having body image issues. I think that it's kind of like eating disorders, you know, where it's like someone with an eating disorder is going to have genuine torturous angst over their body and disliking their body, but at the same time, there's also the socially contagious communal aspect where it's like you want to be the sickest, you want to be going the furthest, you want to be showing your commitment. So I think that does exist almost in a direct parallel in some of these young FTM or non-binary circles.

[...]

Helena: So I just pretty much from the get-go started using Tumblr a lot hours and hours and hours a day, and anyone who's been on Tumblr knows that pretty much as soon as you get involved in any kind of community, you see the social justice kind of posts popping up. So, in between everything, you have with whatever you're interested in, your fandom, you'll see posts just all over the place talking about social justice stuff all the time. And a lot of the times it's very emotionally charged. It's not just some kind of educational post, it's like "white people need to shut up," just really emotionally charged stuff.

I remember seeing this kind of stuff and at first - I had one friend in real life at this point, and he was a gay boy using Tumblr as well and I remember we would be calling each other late at night and making fun of these social justice warriors, because we just thought it was kind of ridiculous. And then I had a falling out with that friend and we kind of stopped talking. So then I was just left to Tumblr. And I remember just always having this kind of deep resentment of like, why are you talking such shit about cis people, what's wrong with being cis, what's wrong with not wanting to transition or be trans or think I'm a boy, there's nothing weird about that. I had this intense resentment of that.

But over time that resentment I guess. turned into okay fine, I guess I need to not be cis. Like, a subconscious process, this wasn't like a decision to like, I'm not going to be cis anymore. But I think it was a subconscious process of just giving in and being like, look I don't want to feel this resentment, I don't want to feel like I'm constantly the butt of every joke, I don't want to feel like I'm constantly walking on eggshells because if I say anything, a billion people are going to come at me because I'm cis and I have no right to talk. So, I remember there was a few days where I kind of mulled over it, and then I was like, you know what, maybe they/them pronouns do feel better than she/her pronouns. I've never felt connected to being a girl anyway - what does that even mean?

So, I made my little post being like, I'm just trying out they/them pronouns to see how it feels. And then obviously immediately everyone was like, oh that's so awesome, that's great, we'll call you they/them, we accept you, blah, blah. And so I was like, cool. And it just kind of kept going from there where I would acclimate to the they/them pronouns, not doing any of this in real life, this was all on Tumblr, but then again my mind was all on Tumblr too, I wasn't really connecting with the outside world at all.

I would acclimate to the they/them pronouns, and then I would be like okay, well you know what, I think I'm actually a demi-girl, that's my gender identity. And then I would kind of acclimate to that. People would be like, yay, so proud of you. And then I would say, you know what, maybe I'm agender. And then people would be like, yay, yay, congratulations. And then I would acclimate to that. And then I'd be like, well maybe my pronouns are xie/xir - I remember I used that at one point. And again, everybody is like super happy about it.

And yeah, it took me from feeling like, oh I've been rejected in real life and now I'm getting rejected again, and I'm really angry about it and but I don't feel I don't have the confidence to just continue being myself so I'm going to change myself. And then when I changed myself, there was all of this social reward.

Aaron Kimberly: That's the point that I was picking up on in your story, right, is every time you announced a change in identity, you were getting the reward of the approval, and the support. And then it makes me wonder, that really reinforces a constant changing of identity, because I could see a person getting - especially if a person is really isolated - this, if every time you change your identity you're getting that kind of hit of that reward, it does seem to - it makes sense to me anyway, that that would lend itself to people kind of experimenting with a lot of different identities and constantly shifting identity.

Helena: And another thing is that, obviously when you're first learning about all this gender identity, pronoun stuff, it seems like this massive world of stuff that you've never considered. And so I think that when in your real life you feel like people don't accept you, but then in this alternate reality of Tumblr, you feel like people accepted you for they/them, you start to think like, could I push this further, could I test to see how much people accept me based on how intricate my pronouns and gender become. I'm sure you guys have seen this online where people write in their bios or in their card or whatever, they'll be like, my pronouns change depending on blah, blah, blah, blah, and my gender identity is different depending on blah, blah, blah, I'm a girl during the full moon, and I am an androgene agender, blah, blah, blah when it rains. People kind of do that.

And I think that, at least for me, because I didn't go that far but I did use the xie/xir pronouns, and stuff like that. I think that it's kind of like you're feeling acceptance for the first time, and that it's conditional, but you're so hungry for that feeling of acceptance that you keep changing things and making them more complicated and digging the hole even further, to test if people will continue accepting you. And they always do, because it's not real acceptance, it's conditional, and they just continue cheering you on. And it's so easy to get your perception warped that way.

Aaron Terrell: Do you think that there is some social currency in that worldview where you're essentially separating yourself further and further from like, mainstream understandings? Is that where the praise is coming from, that you're kind of distancing yourself more and more from like, cis-het society?

Helena: Absolutely, I think that it's there on like the political level where in the worldview it's like, cis heteronormative, post-colonialist, white society is this evil, horrible institution that's killing people and blah, blah, blah. And then so, what you want to do in response to that is to separate yourself. And in this particular worldview, a lot of that is done through identity and through language, and so you want to separate yourself from that, you know, cis, heteronormative, white hegemony or whatever they want to call it. So, there's that.

But then I think there's also just the kind of normal teenage tendency to - for some teenagers - to want to be part of an alternative group, an alternative lifestyle. So, I think there's that too. I remember feeling that way when I was in high school, when I had to go to school and interact with the normies, I would just kind of cope with the fact that I wasn't fitting in by being like, these idiots, they don't even understand that we live in a cis, hetero, white patriarchy, blah, blah, blah, blah. And that was just kind of my way of not having to really come to terms with the fact that I didn't have many friends, or that I wasn't fitting in with the normal people. I think that's pretty normal for certain teenagers, but there's definitely that at play too.

[...]

Aaron Terrell: So, you also had a really interesting experience at that clinic, because as I recall, you're telling Sasha and Stella on "Gender: A Wider Lens," you basically told them, oh I've got big boobs and big hips, and therefore I need extra testosterone, and they're like, oh yeah, totally that sounds legit.

Helena: Literally, I shit you not, that is what happened. So, usually they start you off on a dose, from what I've heard from other women who have been on testosterone, usually 25 milligrams is kind of where you get started out. I've heard from a much smaller group of people that 50 milligrams is where they started out, but usually it's somewhere down there.

And so I originally was getting prescribed 25 milligrams - and this is a week - and I expressed that I was concerned that it wasn't going to have any effect on me, because I feel like I produce more estrogen, because I have big hips, not even big hips, big thighs and big boobs, which is crazy to me every time I tell this story, I'm like what the, why did she listen to me? You can look at me, I don't have abnormally large boobs or thighs, what the fuck?

But yeah, basically she was just kind of like, okay so do you want to go up to like 50 milligrams? And I was like, I might need it to be higher. And so she was like, okay so where do you want to start at? And I was just like, what's the highest? And she said, usually we don't go over 100 milligrams. And then I was like, can we do that? And she agreed to it, and so that's what she prescribed me. I have the records and everything.

Aaron Kimberly: Just to put that in perspective, I'm on 65 every week. Have been for years.

Aaron Terrell: I started at 25 and was on that for six years, and I've been on 50 for the last four. It's interesting when you talk about the kind of mental turmoil, the emotional roller coaster that you went on, it makes a lot of sense when you realize how just how much testosterone was flooded into your system.

Helena: With no gradual build-up to it. It was just one day I had normal female levels of testosterone, and the next day I was injecting 100 milligrams into my flesh.

Aaron Terrell: It's likely about 50 times what your body was used to, somewhere between like 30 to 50, I would say.

[letterboard-fantasy]

Sins and Virtues Breakdown [a sinfully delightful assortment, if you will/ih]

*this post is sponsored by Pins and Four supporting my special interests/hj

First, I'll hand you all this handy chart :) it has the sins/virtues and their latin names skdjnsn

I think here is where I'll talk about color schemes and the specific versions of the sins and how I theme them, and maybe I'll even throw in some costume tiers. And virtue talk tooooo

Cardinal Sins and Heavenly Virtues:

Luxuria [Lust] + Castitas [Chastity]

Okay so *looks at Luxuria! Sastre*/ih

For Luxuria, I portray Lust in a couple different ways. Of course, there's the suggestive version of Lust that comes to mind... but I also think of Lust in a materialistic type of way. Like lusting for power, status, the stuff of the sort where it isn't the suggestive kind but something deeper that's... a bit harder to understand. I guess you could imagine them as a dark temptress, trying to draw you in with different promises,,, whether it's power, money, or something... more seductive skfjdjfn

Color Palette wise… and costume tier wise... I imagine Luxuria has a rich purple pink black color scheme! Especially with an all black outfit with a dark pink/purple accent to draw your attention to… all their curves 😏/ih I also think heart shaped horns would be SO FUN cause when I drew Luxuria! Sastre, he had this set of horns that kind of curl in on themselves but if I can make them curl into the two halves of a heart???? OOOOOO I also think they’d be dressed in form fitting clothes and leather while also having that dramatic feather boa incorporated into the mix. Omg and a little sharp spade tail… 🤭

I’m going to keep using Sastre as my example because he has that Luxuria skin and I can’t properly articulate my ideas otherwise so/ih but just imagine him tying you up with the feather boa and pulling out closer???? Like woooahhhhhh there buy me dinner first/ih and those cold metal claws gently holding your face like you’re a squishy potato/j

I think Luxuria definitely has the markings of a upper class A tier. Like fancy and alluring but just not quite S tier,,,

———

Chasity... man, Chasity is a weird one because it's like abstaining??? But in a wider lense, with this lense of lust, it's got this sense of hard work and abstinence. Abstaining from temptation, both of the suggestive kind and of the materialistic kind. Bare bones, only the necessities,,,

For colors, I think a white and light purple/pink color scheme would be so brilliant, especially with these golden accents. I think Castitas would dress up in lots of lace and gems where it’s covering and more fitting yet also 👁️ 👁️ like very beautiful very elegant like it should be so gentle and so pure yet,,, and wings,,, wings..!!!!

Castitas is definitely an A tier type of virtue I am telling you. Like fancy but contained delicate looking with its strengths… they’re definitely an a tier type of skin,,,

Gula [Gluttony] + Temperantia [Temperance]

For Gula, I don't portray Gluttony in the uh "traditional" sense I guess? While Gluttony is more known towards the comusption of food specifically [ie eating too much food] I like to think Gluttony should be more of the excess consumption of anything! Food, media, power, etc.

It's an indulgent sin, it shouldn't just apply to food and/or food-like sources. And it should be indulging to a greedy degree! That's what it means to be a glutton >:) This means indulging in every good thing. I also think that Gluttony is CONSTANTLY hungry. Like, they ever get full, they can just eat and eat and eat.

Gula seems like they’d work WONDERFULLY in blue!! Black and bright neon blues,,, with lots of fun gradients… I’m thinking no horns for Gula because I feel like they should have an indulgent outfit from head to toe,,, having an extra af hat onto of their head seems like such a good idea I- wahhhhh

I feel like the only way to portray Gula in all their glory is to give them the Sins S tier slot I’m sorryyyy I’m totally not playing favoritism here/ih it’s just in my head, right??? Load them up with details and accessories to show that indulgent, over the top, gluttonous nature feels like it would be an S tier worthy outfit, ya know???

———

Temperantia... should be a healthy balance. Not too much, but they also know there's no harm in treating yourself. They strive to treat others more than to treat themselves, and want everyone to have a good time! For them, it means taking a step back away from the spotlight and allowing others a chance at happiness. They share most of their food, they give away excessive items they own, they surprise their friends and loved ones with luxury... :)

Temperantia… I’m thinking that similar to Luxuria and Castitas, that the virtue and sin should have the same colors but with black/white added into the mix! So, Temperantia would have blues and white, with gold accents as well. It should be decorated... but still simple.

Temperantia is definitely an a tier,,, not too detailed but still pretty,,,

Avaritia [Greed] + Caritas [Charity]

Avaritia... For Greed, it's all about cravings! On the surface level, it's easy to mistake Gluttony and Greed due to them both being about excessive consumption... but while Gluttony wants everything it can get its hands on, Greed wants only the best of the best, and believes if it cannot have something, it MUST be destroyed. Gluttony will give up something to pursue something else, but Greed won't stop until it is theirs or completely destroyed. Because if they can't have it? No one can.

Avaritia having a black and yellow/golden color scheme. She’s a fabulous bitch/ih I imagine Avaritia is a smaller sin (like a child??) because have you ever met a child? They are either the sweetest little things or they will make your life a living hell. I have seen kids break toys in half because they couldn’t have it. No one can and you’re paying 15 dollars for a broken toy./lh I also feel like a younger looking Avaritia can get so much out of just having that child like cuteness,,,

Avaritia could be an S tier but I think only one sin can have an S tier so A tier be upon thee/ih

———

Charity and Kindness go hand in hand because it's all about helping out others. Charity handles bigger projects, and they live to help others. Their whole live revolves around helping others at no cost. I think Caritas and Humanitas would be siblings skjdnsknf

Caritas… I think a white and gold color scheme would be amazing in them. Like just so gentle and holy seeming,,, I feel like a long, flowing dress would be so nice and fitting. Especially if they pull things out of their sleeves Ayato style/ih like just imagine them walking over and whipping a whole thanksgiving meal out of their sleeve like “did someone say they’re ✨ hungry? ✨”

I think a-tier would be nice for Caritas but give them an s tier accessory that just lets them pull shit out of thin air/j Actually no I haven't chosen the Virtue S tier slot so *throws it at Caritas*/ih

Acedia [Sloth] + Diligentia [Diligence]

Like Gula, Acedia is seen in a different light with me. While Sloth is normally associated with laziness aka doing nothing, for me, it's more of a sluggish, bare minimum type of laziness. Instead of doing nothing, Acedia does the bare minimum, and everything they do is done with as little effort as they can get away with. This means letting others do the work, facing the blame, and taking the fall. It's all about doing the least amount of work possible by using others to your advantage, which I personally think makes for a scarier type of character. Because they get so far doing so little...

Acedia… I imagine Acedia breaks the color palette mold… like I think dull greens and dull yellows/off whites and dull pinks,,, because Acedia gives off these gentle sin vibes and I think neon and dark colors would take away from those softer/gentler sins vibes. Having knitted, oversized sweaters,,, with oversized sleeves… and having soft hands and round faces and even a little travel pillow,,, with all these different earthy flowery elements to it. And imagine a Sakura goddess outfit for Acedia,,, wahhh

Acedia’s base is definitely an A tier type of costume!! Don’t ask why just know I’m right/ih

———

Diligentia is probably the most polar to it's corresponding sin, to be honest. I feel like diligence can be a great virtue! They're smart, har working, flexible, but when does hard working become tiresome? Where does Diligence draw the line between working hard and burning yourself out, you know? I feel like it's a pretty thin line... maybe you should take Sloth's advice for once. Take a break, get a snack and have a rest.

Diligentia,,,, I think they’d keep with the virtues theme. Having a white, gold and yellow/green color scheme, and wearing a suit of some kind or being just very well put together, very well dressed.

A tier a tier a tier-

Invidia [Envy] + Humanitas [Kindness]

For Invidia, I think classical envy works so well! Envy is one of the more personal sins, and they're definitely a harsher, more sabotaging sin. They're a resentful, terrible mess. Similar to Greed, it either wants something or it wants to destroy something. But unlike Greed, their desires are hyperspecific, and it revolves around tearing someone down while building themselves up. They're like a leech, sucking out everything one has, bleeding them dry. And once they're finished with you... well, pray you never become a target in the first place.

Invidia is similar to Luxuria, where it’s a deep purple/pink with black but I think while Luxuria is more purple, Invidia is more pink. Pink with envy,,, I also like to think Invidia is a sharper sin, having spikes and binding and claws,,, like sharp, fabulous and ready to kill. Which, good for them. Oh! And pearl colored accessories!! Like a pearl snake,,, pearl belts,,, pearl earrings,,, with golden jewelry and sharp edges. I think Invidia would have three sets of horns instead of two like the other sins. I just think it would be neat andjskdks

A tier moment/ih

———

Humanitas babygirllllll Kindness is such a simple and nice virtue,,,, similar to Charity, it's all about giving what you have to help out others. By helping others, you can help yourself and make the world a nicer place! Kindness is like offering someone your umbrella in the rain,,, and sharing your sandwich with the kid who doesn't have a lunch. Kindness does it because it makes them feel good! They do a kind deed and it makes them smile knowing they helped someone, even if it's something small.

Humanitas,,, is definitely white, gold, and pink, especially light pinks- with flowery and flowy sleeves and such,,, I’m also thinking they and Acedia could have matching Sakura goddess outfits wahhh

I think that an A tier would fit her, even if her original variation was an S tier sdkfjskdfjn

Ira [Wrath] + Patientia [Patience]

Ira Ira Ira!! Okay, so Wrath. Wrath. Wrath!! It's my favorite sin because it's so versatile... Anyone anywhere can feel wrath for any kind of reason... at any time??? Like. woah. It's the mother [father? Parental figure???] of all sins I mean come onnnnnn. Your lusting advances get rejected? You feel wrath. Your feast is interrupted by some rude random? Wrath! Your envious deeds don't work out how you intended it??? Wrath!!! Like it is, without a doubt, the culmination of all sins.

Ira is definitely has a black and red color palette, and they are definitely wearing some kind of leather studs type of outfit, and they're very sharp and rough looking. You've probably already seen a version of my Ira heheheheh

They're probably gonna be an a tier,,,,

———

Patientia is... just that. Patience! Being patient and kind with others in comparison to Wrath's harsh and quick-to-anger personality, Patience is like a gentle soul-healing hug,,, take your time sweetie, I know you can do it <333

I think Patientia would have a gold, white, and red color palette,,, with golden leaf accessories,,, I imagine that they're a gentle, elegant virtue, like a mom friend! I want them to look soft and gentle in comparison to Ira!!

I think that Patientia could definitely be an A tier,,,,

Superbia [Pride] + Humilitas [Humility]

Superbia... I see Pride as an overflowing, excessive amount of self-confidence. Someone who's TOO confident in themselves or others to the point it's harmful. They tear others down to make them seem more important. They can't take a hint, and they can't BEAR being proven wrong. Because HOW could they be wrong? You must be mistaken.

Similar to Gula, I'm thinking of a black and blue color palette... but with Superbia, I think dark blues would be fun to use,,, with silver as the "royal" type of color... Superbia should look extremely upper class, kind of like a prince or princess...

Superbia would be an A tier... thinking of like Runaway vibes???

———

Humilitas is the opposite, where its like... being humble of yourself but uplifting of others in this case! Unlike Pride, Humility means recognizing that... you're not the shit honey! Sit down!/ih

Okay okay okay Humilitas. I'm thinking, no, I know it'll be two different blues [bright and deep blue], white and gold,,,, with thick, long white hair and constantly closed eyes,,, with big sleeves... heheheheh

Humilitas is definitely an A tier,,,

Vanagloria [Vainglory/Pride?] + Vanitas [Vanity]

what the fuck is Vainglory. What the fuck is Vanity???? How are these both not sins??? huh??? huh. huh! Okay so Vainglory and Vanity are a cardinal sin/heavenly virtue BUT NOT one of the big 7. Vainglory is kind of like... craving the praise and respect of others [so in this case, the big 7] but in such a way you don’t mind harming others to get it…

I think Vanagloria would have an exclusively monochrome color palette,,, so it's in all black, white, and silver,,, or a tight outfit with over-the-top metallic accessories to flesh out a "boring" interior with a almost goddess-like exterior,,,

Vanagloria... I was honestly originally thinking of an SS tier skin because I think that Vanagloria could be,,, like,,, the "creator" of the 7 sins and likewise with Vanitas,,, but shhhhh

———

And Vanity [the good kind???] is like pride but in a healthy amount. Being proud of your accomplishments and others without damaging other's self worth and feelings! I think.

So, I'm thinking to oppose Vanagolira, that I could do a total rainbow color palette, like all the "good" colors, everyone wants a bit of what Vanitas has, ya know?

I will just *gestures you to Vanagloria tier explanation*

So I guess [based off the explanations above] that the in theory costume tier list would go something like this?????:

SS Tier costumes:

Vanagloria and Vanitas

S Tier Costumes:

Gula and Caritas

A Tier Costumes:

Castitas, Luxuria, Temperantia, Avaritia, Diligentia, Acedia, Humanitas, Invidia, Patientia, Ira, Humilitas and Superbia.

Of course, there's the playable versions of them [think Genshin or Honkai] but i will NOT get into that, because that's a whole 'nother can of worms. this alone took like 3 days SIT DOWN/ih

I'm also thinking what other characters would be included like,,, in the overworld it isn't just the sins skdjfnksjfn

if you want more you will have to wait because Barriere won't write itself ksjdfnksjfnkjf/ih

[variousqueerthings]

Final Verdict on The Four Seasons

1. I didn’t hate it, but it definitely was definitely of the Type of movies that I don’t usually watch -- upper-middle class white straight people relationships

2. so many things where I was like, “if this were me and my close people, we simply wouldn’t do x, because we recognise those habits as the kind of fucked up shit that led to all of our parents’ divorces and now we’re all queers”

3. and specifically the men (not Alan Alda, who... maybe was playing Alan Alda? (affectionately)) were assholes. it was not an equal distribution of “people do things sometimes that hurt the people they love,” it was specifically the two other guys -- especially the main best friend -- who were of the kind of mundane “you really just suck the energy out of the room” assholery

4. nobody telling the best friend that he’s acting like kind of a creep? that he’s having a midlife crisis? asking him what he has in common with a much younger woman who thinks he’s soooooooooo smart and sophisticated? they’re all just dancing around it until it never comes up at all

5. did appreciate that said woman was never framed as an issue, they all seemed to genuinely like her and I kind of wish that she’d dumped him and just joined the main friend group 

6. Alan Alda’s character was not wrong once (well, maybe when he tried to do a ski-jump) and especially not when he was confronting his friend on how he was talking about his (soon to be ex) wife, when he was confronting his friend on having cheated for years on said wife, and when he was confronting his friend on having another kid at this point in his life -- you all shoulda backed him on this (and on “hey why don’t we talk about how we’re feeling,” you’re all so emotionally repressed)

7. Carol Burnett and Rita Moreno were also not wrong once

8. Pleased to have seen it, not the worst of this Type of movie for sure