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myfairstarlight · 4 months ago

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To Have and to Hold - Penelope and Colin's journey to self-love

Companion piece - or one might say part 2 - of An Ode to Friends to Lovers.

Goddammit this was not supposed to be or take this long.

Ahum. Some time has passed, and after sorting through all my thoughts and feelings, here it finally is, my endless ramblings about two friends in love, but not only.

If anyone asks, no I did not take this long to write this post because of the fact that when taking screenshots to illustrate some parts of this analysis I ended up rewatching whole episodes instead.

So, dearest gentle readers, here's my Bridgerton s3 review, with focus on part 2, but looking at the season as a whole too; the highlights, the let downs, and polin's full love story, let's dive in, shall we?

The one thing I really liked about s3, something the other seasons could not do, is how so much is structured around parallels and callbacks to previous seasons, in the narration and in the visuals, for both Penelope and Colin. It is the advantage of having a main couple who's been here from the start, and with them, many other characters get weaved into their story, more particularly in part 2. I think that's why I personally did not mind the fact we did not get flashback sequences, unlike previous seasons (although I would have loved to see baby Colin and Penelope meeting... perhaps with Edmund and Violet watching them play and noting how they were childhood friends as well...) And what can I say? I'm a sucker for parallels as someone who loves to look at the details and perhaps overthink things.

So before we tackle Penelope and Colin individually and as a pair, let's talk about:

Eloise's love for Penelope

Eloise ends up being the catalyst for this second part, when she was mostly an observer in part 1. In many ways, she parallels Colin. Childhood friends with Penelope, betrayed by the Whistledown reveal, and yet still caring and protecting Penelope in her own way, which also paralleled Colin. And because I can, here's a small list:

Eloise distracting Cressida so she does not bully Penelope (s3e1) / Colin refusing a dance with Cressida to dance with Pen instead (s1e1)

Eloise running after her at the Four Seasons ball after accidentally revealing her and Colin's secret / Colin running after Penelope at the ball in s3e1

Colin visiting Penelope to apologise for his comment last season and offering the lessons to help her find a husband / Eloise visiting her to apologise and wish her the best in her endeavour to find a husband

Colin leaving to travel and find himself at the end of previous seasons but staying now / Eloise now travelling to Scotland to find herself

Now that we have the whole season, you can tell that in part 1, she foreshadowed how Colin would react in part 2, he just goes through her whole journey in a lot less time. See the direct parallel at the beginning of e5 as Eloise yells at Penelope and storms out, then Colin swoops in and comforts her, and then the end of e7, where Colin is the one upset with Penelope and after he storms out, Eloise is there, hugging her best friend and telling her everything will be alright.

When one is absent, the other is there for Penelope, because despite everything they love her and they know that through the years, Penelope has loved and supported them as well, even if she was still hiding this big part of her. Penelope makes Eloise feel listened to, and makes Colin feel seen. She was their safe space as much as they were hers.

Eloise is also the very reason Colin learning about Whistledown goes so wrong. She is the one pressuring Penelope to tell him, and also the one who eventually tells her to never tell him the truth when Cressida comes forward and claims to be Whistledown. Yes, Penelope is definitely still at fault as well for taking so long to tell him, but to her credit she did intend on telling him after publishing one last column discrediting Cressida, before being convinced to give it up by Eloise. And then when Cressida manages to publish something, and Eloise is terrified about what it means considering she just broke off their friendship, it is to protect Eloise from her ire that Penelope takes her quill again and sneaks out to publish, which leads to Colin finding out.

Then comes her scene with Colin as he asks his sister how long she's known, where all the parallels come through.

"Have you already forgiven her?"

"I want to. Do you think you can?"

Colin goes on to say Eloise is lucky that she's never been in love, implying that his love for Penelope makes it that much harder to forgive. However, he fails to understand that Eloise is in love as well, perhaps not in the romantic sense, but she is, or she would not have been this distraught for a year over her falling out with Penelope, and yet always somewhat keeping an eye on her. And just like how eventually, as push comes to shove, she finds her way back to Penelope, Colin will do much the same as a looming threat comes their way.

She and Colin are also similar in their insecurity regarding Penelope's love for them, and in turn Penelope spends a good length of the season reassuring them. She constantly tells Colin she loves him, especially after the reveal so he knows that this part of her was never deceiving. She reassures Eloise that their friendship is just as important as her love for Colin and she doesn't want to lose either of them.

The fascinating thing for me about Eloise when taking into account Polin, is that in part 1 they needed her to be away so Colin and Penelope could spend more time together uninterrupted, leading to Colin realising his feelings. This also applies to season 2 actually! While Eloise was in the hunt for LW and distracted by Theo, that's what allowed Colin and Penelope to have a full proper conversation about their purpose, and I'd argue that the moment Penelope said "my purpose shall set me free", something started to shift in their relationship.

In part 2, without Eloise, I wonder if they would have even been able to come together without any more secret between them, if she hadn't been the one to push Penelope to tell the truth, and then the one to support her while Colin was processing his own feelings.

Penelope's ambitions and womanhood

Penelope's journey to self-confidence continues in part 2, this time in regards to Whistledown as she finally accepts her as a part of her, rather than a mask to hide behind. Enters Genevieve Delacroix, the only character in this show who knows what it means to be a woman with a business. It is no coincidence her scene in e6 comes after Portia's talk of "ladies do not have dreams" and after Eloise convinced Penelope to give up Whistledown, because it is just gossip. She directly opposes them.

In part 1, she helped Penelope be more confident by providing her with a new wardrobe that fits her better, and in part 2, Gen is the very reason Penelope learns to be proud of Whistledown, own up to the mistakes, and yet fully claim her as her.

And then, the final nail in the coffin to me: Cressida, in a red "revenge" dress, shows up at the Mondrich ball, and wields the Whistledown name as Confident by Demi Lovato plays in the background. Cressida stands tall and proud despite the whispers, and I think a part of Penelope truly broke then. If Cressida could exhume such confidence for a body of work which is not even hers, then why can't Penelope be proud of what she's accomplished? This past week has been killing her, she admits it to Gen the eve of her wedding, Colin was a great distraction but giving up Whistledown, putting down her quill, it truly hurt her, and a part of her cannot imagine giving it up again. And so Gen gives her the very advice she needed to hear.

"There is no such thing as true love without embracing your true self."

And look at the contrast before vs after her talk with Gen:

Colin, of course, shares Eloise's point of view, Penelope should just give it up, and to be fair, he's more scared for her safety, since he caught her alone in the street at night, and then the Queen just threatened the family again. But Penelope cannot stand for that anymore, she is tired of running and hiding. That is Penelope having the confidence to truly be herself. By the end of e7, she's fully bloomed into the woman she's always been behind her quill. The irony being that Colin was also the one who helped her embrace that in part 1, as he helped her bring out that part of her that he's always been privileged to.

And in e8, we see her take the reins. Do what must be done to protect the ones she cares about.

So let's talk about Portia now, because she may not have a business per se, but she had to essentially become "the man of the house" to keep her daughters safe and the fortune they have intact. I've seen people say her redemption came out of nowhere but I concur that in part 1, as Penelope's confidence starts to grow and she stands up to her family, Portia is already trying to be a better, supportive mother, and in turn, Prudence and Philippa follow her lead. Portia is a practical woman, not a sentimental one, at least she doesn't let herself be, that we have seen since the beginning of the show, that's why she was reprimanding Penelope for being reckless with her reputation by asking for Colin's help, and then was pushing for the match with Debling, because he was a lord, who could offer stability, and who would be away most of the time, leaving the managing of his estate to his wife, to Portia that is (or rather, was) the ideal life a woman can achieve.

I loved that they had Portia learn about Whistledown before the public reveal, because then she has to truly face the fact that she has overlooked Penelope all this time, the daughter who is most like her, and Portia is also the only one who points out that Penelope has written badly about herself. It forces Penelope to face the fact that in many ways, she truly is her mother's daughter as well.

Portia ends up being the driving force behind Penelope's decision to reveal herself as well, I believe. Because we joke about how Penelope hid so much money in the floor boards while her family was going broke but mind you, she had no idea they were having money problems, because Portia tried to hide it to not worry them, the same way Penelope has kept her Whistledown secret in the misguided belief that it was for the better, that she could handle the weight of it all on her own. By revealing herself to the Queen, she could free Colin from her mess, get away from Cressida's blackmail and, if the Queen doesn't behead her, she can save her family's title thanks to her writing and money.

Portia's and Penelope's mending relationship was the highlight of the season for me, the true redemption I wanted to see and am glad I got. And I want to point out a little sweet moment in the last episode:

After the Whistledown reveal, as Portia comes over to praise her daughter, she notices Colin looking in their direction. I personally believe Penelope told her about the annulment, and this is her way to support her before she sends her off to have that conversation with Colin. Portia, who's never been the affectionate mother before, gently caresses her cheek and calls her "My girl", because no matter the outcome she will always remain her little girl.

The beautiful thing about Penelope's ambitions is that they were driven by the women in her life, that's one strength of this season to me. She was inspired by Eloise's strong opinions she so readily shared, Portia's sometimes ruthless ways in the way she protects her family and herself, and Genevieve's smart business endeavours and passion. And so she cannot, won't give that up for a society who is so unfair to women, ironically because the Queen herself is so harsh on debutantes. And isn't it poetic cinema that she ends up revealing herself, in her own terms, during the very ball she fully funded? And after that, it is Philippa, her family she mended things with, who saves her from embarrassment by releasing the butterflies? And then the very same Philippa who during the epilogue, happily declares that her daughter can grow into a successful writer who might not need a husband, just like her little sister?

Side note again but it is also interesting that in contrast we had the Mondrich subplot, wherein Will has to let go of his bar to be accepted in high society (and he's clearly not happy about it), because the London elites do not work, yet here Penelope is, owning a business approved by the Queen.

Penelope's ambitions, in turn, inspire others. Portia, into allowing herself to be soft, Prudence to be more honest (the pregnancy hormones probably helped too), Philippa to readily consider other paths in life, and Eloise into finally doing something and discover a little bit of the world.

And she inspires another Bridgerton as well.

Penelope's bravery and Colin's envy

The thing about Penelope and Colin, and that has been said before, is that their roles are reversed. In romance shows such as these, the man is usually the one with a hard exterior, with secrets he wishes to keep to himself while the woman is the one who encourages him to open up by loving him. That is literally s1 with Simon and Daphne. And even in some ways, it is also Anthony and Kate, the difference being that Kate was not trying to get Anthony to soften up, she was directly confronting him so he fixes his shit himself (I still have beef with Anthony, good for him for becoming a My Wife guy in s3 but man, the journey there was tough).

Anyway. With Penelope and Colin? Penelope is the one with the secrets, who wishes, at first, for a practical match so she may gain her freedom. Colin is the soft-hearted and romantic one, who although offers the lessons, keeps asking her if she likes any of the suitors she talks to. And then, it shifts again. Not in the literal sense, Colin has no secret after he's dropped his rake façade, but he does become a bit colder after the Whistledown reveal, while Penelope becomes the one reassuring him she loves him, and emphasising their emotional bond after she's gained the confidence to do so and accepted that a love match was still in the cards for her. But now, they must overcome Whistledown, the last obstacle she's been hiding behind.

"Well, if she was hiding behind Whistledown, how come Colin calls her brave even before the reveal?"

Well, I'm glad you asked, imaginary person in my head! Let's dial back a bit again.

I am a firm believer that Colin's envy towards Penelope (and him realising his romantic feelings) actually started back in s2, during their talk about purpose. She was the one leading the conversation then, who knew what her purpose would be, and to him, that is bravery, being true to oneself and knowing your place. And we see how in s3 part 1, Colin resorts to adopting a whole new persona, something Penelope does not do, even after changing her entire wardrobe and facing the Ton's eyes, she remains herself (and she is capable of acting! She effortlessly disguises herself as a maid and fakes an accent when delivering the Whistledown papers), and I think Colin noticed that. She has a new dress, and her hair looks different, but she's still Pen, meanwhile he, on the other hand, is pretending to be someone else. And when the scandal about the lessons came out, Penelope still showed her face when people were still preoccupied by the scandal. Debling says it best:

"Well done."

"For being a fool?"

"For stepping away from the herd, even though you risked becoming a target."

Penelope's bravery and honesty are the very reason Debling is interested in her, rather than in Cressida; she knows who she is, and what she likes (whereas Cressida adapts). Sure, he was not looking for a love match, but he was looking for authenticity, which Penelope always had. Because she's terrible at hiding her identity, actually. Eloise guesses it's her after listening to her once! Penelope has never hidden how much she likes gossip. In s2e1 she admits it outright that being a wallflower allows her to hear everything.

Colin rereads her letters and realises, wait, she really is Whistledown, she writes the same way, and although he had mixed feelings about Whistledown, he described her as clever, a quality he's always associated with Penelope as well. She says shit like "it would have been suspicious if she hadn't written about this scandal"... like that girl is not good at hiding herself actually, has never been, it's just that no one really paid her any notice and she was not put into the spotlight until now. I think a part of her unconsciously wanted them to connect the dots because the loneliness was getting to her but she was still scared to own up to it, so she continued to lie.

She's always been true to herself to some degree though, which is its own form of bravery, but she's never had the courage to ask for what she wanted before Colin helped her build her confidence. Colin, on the other hand, may be dense and oblivious, but when he wants something, he is not shy about it, and can even be a bit too impulsive. He's the one who always seeks her out and always tries to protect her and make her happy.

In part 2, as Penelope truly embraces all of herself, just like Colin is learning to be more vulnerable and let go of his ego, the dynamic between them shifts. He's the man, but she got the power.

It started when she gathered the courage to ask for that first kiss, which changed everything, and it solidified when she is the one who seeks Colin at their wedding breakfast. In that instant, he's the wallflower, and she's the one pulling him into the centre and dance in broad daylight.

And this translates in the bedroom too as she goes from following his lead to riding his d-

Ahum, who said that? Anyway, topic at hand. As the dynamic shifts, as Penelope learns to truly be herself and Colin learns the truth, that is when his envy and lack of direction in his own life become too much, and he cannot avoid it anymore. Because he thought he had found his purpose at last, be Penelope's husband, take care of her, provide for her, be the head of their family. But now he learns she's been living a dangerous double life this whole time, that she "mocked" him at the beginning of the season, and she might not even need him to protect her as much as he thought she did because she has money and a prolific career despite being a young lady with minimal agency.

And he had already been struggling before the reveal. In all of part 1, he was grappling with his sense of self, realising that pretending was not worth it if he felt empty and if it meant losing Penelope in the process as well. And in part 2, we already saw him struggling with his writing, only able to write again after Penelope tells him she's loved him for years. And then, he refuses Penelope's help to edit his journals into a book because he wants to prove to himself and to her that he could do it on his own. That he is worthy of her love.

Also note that at that point, Penelope had given up on Whistledown, and wanted to live through him by editing for him as well. Just before, we had the scene where she burned her old Whistledown issues at the same time as Colin was writing, suddenly overcome with inspiration (in this regard, I like that the show ends up allowing Penelope to keep the column and still help Colin with his book, rather than her giving up LW like in the book, where she lives vicariously through him. I know she eventually becomes a romance author in the books, and I hope she also reaches that point in the show, but it is nice she does not have to give up her pen first, you know?)

So when Colin learns she's been a published writer this whole time while he was struggling to find a purpose? Penelope started Whistledown in her first year out after all, at the exact same time, Colin wanted to prove to his family that he can be taken seriously, leading to his disastrous betrothal that season. He had needed to travel to find himself, and even then, it didn't give him the answers he was seeking, and no one was taking his newfound experiences seriously, except Penelope. He's a third son, neither the Viscount, neither the spare, so he had nothing to himself. But Penelope is much in the same situation, a third daughter, from a family less fortunate that his, and yet she has accomplished more than he has. He was already so insecure about his love being unrequited but now that he knows she does not even need to rely on him for financial stability and security? Let's dive more into that, shall we?

Colin's self-worth and ambitions

I've seen a lot of people lament the fact that Colin does not feel as much of a protagonist as Penelope, and while I agree to some degree, such argument fails to take into account the fact that he is the reason the season exists in the first place, not just on a meta level because he's a Bridgerton, but because every action he takes progresses the story. Colin is the driving force of the narrative, while Penelope is the heart of it because he loves her.

He offers the lessons to make up for his comment last season, leading to Penelope gaining in confidence. He interrupts Debling's imminent proposal and chases Penelope's carriage, leading to the engagement. He confronts Portia, leading to her re-evaluating the way she treats her daughters and the Featheringtons mending their relationship. He confronts Eloise and reminds her how obsessed she used to be with Penelope, leading to the reconciliation between the two. He follows Penelope out of worry and learns about Whistledown. When the blackmail happens, he confronts Cressida, this time things get worse (his infamous impulsiveness biting him in the ass once more), but it is still furthering the narrative, leading to Penelope taking things into her own hands and revealing herself in her own terms.

His actions are loud, however his internal growth is much more subtle and we get less scenes of him alone compared to Penelope. And that, I agree, is a weakness of this season. I mean, he spends barely 1/8 of the season upset at Penelope, when people act like he was for half the season. If you watch from the start instead of just looking at part 2, Polin have a lot more happy and cute scenes than angsty ones. Hell! They have more kisses than saphne and kanthony in their own seasons combined, I bet (I didn't count, truth be told, but since they get together halfway through the season, as opposed to in the later half, and had their first kiss in episode 2, I think it's a safe bet to make) (Edit from Star from the future here: so I admit I was wrong. Simon and Daphne have definitely more kisses because they had so many intimacy scenes upon rewatch. I just forgot about them, my bad (mostly, I tend to block out That Scene too, so). Anthony and Kate, on the other hand, were robbed. It's kinda funny Bridgerton built a reputation to be quite spicy, only for none of the seasons after s1 matching the same level lol). I also do feel like a few flashback scenes of him during his travels, waiting for Penelope's letters but getting none as he starts to act like a rake to compensate for the loneliness, contrasted with the lesson scenes in part 1 where he is carefree and silly with Penelope could have benefited his character. I personally do not think he was treated as a "love interest", he carries the season just as much as Penelope, but his emotional weight is lesser than hers, and that was an issue with the writing and pacing.

So here, I must redirect to my other Colin analysis post, as well as this one comparing book vs show portrayal, and though those were unorganised immediate thoughts after watching the show (and vague memories of the book), I still mostly stand by them and so I can also avoid repeating what I've already written.

Colin's insecurity regarding love is a direct result of s1 and, once again, Marina. The parallels between Marina and Penelope are kinda in your face, especially with Colin dropping the entrapment line.

Side note but between Anthony and Colin trying to get with a family member of their future wives first, I sure hope we won't learn Sophie is related to Lady Tilly Arnold or something because otherwise there's a pattern within the ABC bros.

Another thing is that when Marina's lie was revealed, she admits everything else was a lie as well, including her love for him. He was a means to an end, and there's no reason to pretend anymore. But with Penelope? She still tells him she loves him after the fact, and several times after that. Note that, just like with Marina, he learns of the Big Secret while they're engaged. Just like for Marina, he could just walk away now, Penelope even asks him if he wishes to cry off, but he doesn't.

Colin and emotional intimacy

I already made a post about this, but I will reiterate some points anyhow this time, because I need to make some comparisons with Book!Colin, since I've seen a lot of people be upset that unlike his book counterpart, Show!Colin is not physically affectionate with Penelope while still angry at her. So to address this, let's talk about his journals. It is no coincidence that instead of beautiful descriptions of places he's visited, in the show Penelope reads about his experiences with the "women in Paris" and how empty they make him feel. In the book, Colin is older, he is a rake and very much enjoys ladies' company, but in the show, he's only pretending to be one. It's one change they made I liked, to make him different from Anthony and Benedict (when in the books, all these men sorta blend together if I have to be honest). He's the sweet, sensitive brother, who seeks emotional and physical intimacy. Sure, he has experiences, especially after being mocked for being too green, but they felt like obligations, rather than acts of passion (Benedict) or distractions (Anthony). It is also significant that every time someone asks him about his experiences in part 1, he only ever talks about one contessa and never brings up other women, unlike in his journals where, of course, he goes into more details, knowing no one can judge him there.

And then Penelope reads those words, the depths of his mind and his insecurity, and yet she praises him for his writing, rather than mock him for his feelings of inadequacy. That is when it clicks in Colin's mind, although unconsciously, because he flashes back to that scene when he realises his feelings - Penelope is the only other person he feels comfortable enough with to share such thoughts. That's why their first time is such a contrast with the carriage scene, where it was a moment of passion as they get carried (hah!) away after confessing to each other. He was reeling from realising his feelings and narrowly stopping Penelope's engagement to Debling. There was urgency and then relief. Here, it is slower, more tender, because to Colin, this is it, this is where he can prove to Penelope that this was not a mistake, than he can take care of her, bring her pleasure like she could never imagine. He makes sure to tell Penelope how much he loves her, he asks her consent several times, he makes sure she is comfortable. It's a little awkward, unlike the carriage scene, because this is the real and full deal and he sure does not want to mess it up. After all:

That's why I'm not too mad we did not get a montage with them. Their two major intimate scenes are long sequences with few cuts, emphasised by their proximity and the comfort they feel around each other. They're emotional. They're supposed to make the viewer feel like they're interrupting. And Colin does not want to taint these two experiences, that's why the last intimate scene we get is after they reconcile (though we deserved a longer one). So, to quote myself: Colin does not let his lust take over when he's upset, because Penelope means too much to him. He does not want to lay together only to wake up in a cold bed and still be fighting in the morning. He wants to be hers, body and soul, fully and assuredly, and until he accepts the fact he loves her because of Whistledown and not despite since they are one and the same, then he cannot promise Penelope all of himself either. In his mind, he may be afraid that this emotional intimacy he felt with Penelope when they laid together will be ruined, or just simply gone while he is so tortured by the Whistledown reveal. Everything else is a mess right now but that part of their relationship? It was pure and sincere, and he wants to keep it that way.

And not to dunk on Book!Colin again but that man had anger issues and could be violent, he knew he was hurting her sometimes and did not do shit to stop that. Why would you prefer that over Show!Colin keeping a respectful distance and yet still staying close to Penelope, trying his best to protect her despite it all?

After all, the only time he gives in while they're still fighting is when they argue in the streets and Penelope shouts "I love you" to his face. That is the first time she confesses in the present tense. And for a second, Colin's walls crumble. He's a sensitive man, after all, even when he's upset, he ends up tearing up, so the declaration of love answering his "Then what good am I to you?", a question encompassing all of his insecurities in a few words, well, it's the emotional outburst that makes him almost give in, if they weren't in the middle of the street with carriages passing by. They were also both tipsy in that scene lol.

And while I'm at it, let's link back to my post regarding the entrapment line and the annulment. One thing I fail to mention (there already are so much, to be fair) is that Colin throwing an entrapment accusation can also be interpreted as him giving himself an excuse to remain engaged. The previous episode, he was worried they got carried away in the carriage (and then their future home) and that Penelope was changing her mind. As already mentioned, at that point, just like with Marina he could just walk away. They're only engaged, and no one knows they have been intimate. Sure, it would go against his principles as a gentleman but honestly he already broke them several times when Penelope is involved. And he knows that. He never actually intends to back down, he is determined to marry Penelope, as he said in that carriage this is "a feeling that is like torture, but one I cannot, will not, do not want to give up". But in that one moment, he was hurt and angry and knew what to say to hurt, and did not want to admit that he would have stayed either way because he loves her (and frankly, in this situation, Penelope is in the wrong and she kinda deserves to feel bad about wanting to hide such a thing from him, even if the accusation itself is unfair). So he gives the decision some duty, some responsibility. He's a gentleman, so he must do what's objectively right. Because that is easier than looking into the complexity of his feelings.

And that is marriage to me. Marriage is not a happily ever after. It's a choice, to stay by someone's side through the good and the bad times. And in that moment, he also made his choice, and knew Penelope would be his wife. From then on, they learn to communicate. They were in sync as friends, but as a husband and wife? That is different, even if the foundation is similar, they need to relearn how to navigate life together.

Episode 8 is all about them figuring this out.

Take these scenes for example. First of all, this has been pointed out by many already but: Colin may be mad, but he still stays close to her by sleeping on the settee just outside their bedchamber instead of taking another room. That's dedication.

Right away, Colin establishes a boundary between them and asks for some space, however, he still waits for her to wake up to tell her rather than leave without a word and having the servants inform her. She's visibly upset about it, insisting he should stay so they can talk, but he still leaves. Halfway through the episode, the situation is now reversed, Penelope emerges, already dressed while Colin clearly has not slept all night, she tells him she is leaving and giving him the space he asked for, and it is Colin's turn to be upset and realising that, no, actually he does not really like that distance anymore.

Note that until that point, they both were very confrontational whenever Whistledown was brought up, Penelope on the defensive and Colin on the offensive, they're both third children who were belittled so that is how they respond - Penelope by standing her ground and refusing to budge, and Colin by attacking and asserting himself. But here, Penelope listens to Colin's wants, and lets go a little. She gives him the space he needs, all the while she is also planning how to fix all this mess without lying to or hurting more people. And then later on again, Colin is the one who listens to her needs and her plan. That is the beginning of a healthy marriage as they both let go of their egos, as they both take a step back to listen to the other and realising they no longer have to do things alone, because actually, that distance between them was hurting both of them. Penelope accepts she can rely on others' support and Colin accepts that it is not what he can do that makes him worthy, but simply who he is.

People lament that in the Whistledown public reveal, Colin ended up not contributing much, as opposed to his book counterpart, but that is literally what Penelope asked him to do. She does not need a hero, she needs her Colin. Kind, supportive Colin, who reassured her with a simple smile and a nod on their wedding day, and who did the same when she stepped into the light once more at the Butterfly Ball. He gives her courage, by virtue of being there and loving her. Just like she gives him a purpose by simply loving him as well. The very thing Colin envied, Penelope's bravery? Well, he is one of the reasons it exists in the first place.

In the book, Penelope had no idea Colin was planning to reveal her identity, until the last, like, five minutes. He also told Anthony and Simon behind her back. I love the balcony scene but it always bothered me that Penelope's agency in that decision was taken from her. Therefore I love that they gave it back to her in the show. Just like she said in s1e8, Whistledown cannot be unmasked but if one day she shall be, then it would be in her own terms.

(I also want to say though that despite my criticisms earlier, Book!Polin remain one of my favourite dynamics in the books because despite it all, they're one of the healthiest couples. They work together as a team, and it helps Colin learned about LW before he proposed. They discuss Cressida's blackmail, whereas in the show Colin first dismisses Penelope in his need to prove himself capable of protecting her. We see them encourage each other in their writing more than in the show (fingers crossed for s4 though!) and they even discuss how they will keep Pen's Whistledown money for their children. They're a team, through and through, and in the show, we see the start of that, which makes sense, their show counterparts are ten years younger, not as mature as they are on paper.)

All through part 2, Colin stayed true to his confession in that carriage. His love was like torture. He was so insecure about Penelope not loving him as much as he does, questioning what good he even is to her and if she just lied. And yet he held on and did not want to give it up, he embraced it rather than ran from it like the other leads we had so far. He was shattered by the Whistledown secret and yet, he remained, worked through his sense of self, through his anger, through his insecurity, because Penelope is worth it. He was willing to lie for her, to lie to Benedict to get the money needed, to protect her. And Penelope clung to him just as fiercely, always reminding him that she loves him for simply being him. One always has worth. That is the validation Colin has always craved, that is when it truly sinks in for him and that he understands her selfless love for him; he does not need to pretend, he does not need to be useful, he does not need to have everything figured out, he can breathe. Penelope will be there every step of the way. Has always been, in fact, she's always been a constant in his life, and now that he is lucky enough to stand by her side and soak even a little bit of her light, well, he sure won't ever let go again.

And to end this section, not really a point of analysis, but shoutout to my girl Pen whose first instinct when she realises she can touch Colin is to reach for his hair and boy does he melt at the touch. Unlocked his hair pulling kink right there.

This is still a friends to lovers story

Fear not, the romcom vibes are still here! I kept this part for the last to end on a sweet note, just like this season. And this is also the part where I stop pretending to be a reviewer and I just allow myself to be self-indulgent, pointing out how cute these two are.

So, first of all:

They just fucked and what's the first thing they do together? Laugh. In the carriage, Colin did make a joke, prompting the laughing but in the mirror scene? They simply look at each other and start chuckling because they are so giddy upon realising this is real, they're best friends, and they're in love, and they'll be married and they will soon be able to do this whenever they want. Then, Penelope lets out a bit of her insecurity, hoping this was just as good for Colin as it was for her since she knew he was more experienced, and when he reassures her, Penelope grins and jokes about "the women in Paris", which she does again during the Mondrich ball, teasing him about the spicy parts of his journals. She is so secure in their relationship, she feels no jealousy towards Colin's past experiences but bet if anyone ever brings up Debling again, Colin would lose it, and I kinda wish we had at least one scene of Colin properly addressing his one-sided beef with Debling.

During their whole engagement (and before the LW reveal), they're just so incredibly in love, so sweet it might give you cavities, and it was such a breath of fresh air after two seasons and one spin-off of the main couple never really embracing their love until the later part of the seasons. The way Colin makes Penelope smile during the reading bans scene, then when they dance alone in the church, or when Colin adds the twirl (the flourish!) during the dance at the Mondrich ball and then when they laugh at the Butterfly Ball when everything is said and done and they can finally, fully be themselves... They are just two romantics at heart who are thrilled to be in love and miss no opportunity to flaunt it in front of the Ton who's always judged them so harshly. I wish I could include videos in this because posting screenshots would not give those moments justice.

And the comedic aspect of the romcom vibes of this season are still present in part 2, although a bit overshadowed by the Whistledown drama but I mean:

Penelope and Colin finally having a chaperone in Portia, and having no idea how to act now because they never had to worry about a chaperone before (and by that point, Penelope is already pregnant)

Poor Kanthony trying to find the right time to announce the pregnancy but here come Polin, getting engaged out of nowhere

Portia and Violet's tentative beginning of friendship, wherein Violet is trying so hard to be polite when faced with Portia's over-enthusiastic attitude

The whole charade scene with Anthony getting so competitive and glaring at poor Penelope when she gets the answers right.

All the times someone brought up Whistledown's imminent unmasking and Penelope taking psyching damage every time (meanwhile in part 1, it was everyone telling Colin how kind of him it is to help Pen find a husband). Peak "actions have consequences huh". She could not catch a break. Which okay, she was panicking and then fainted but I still find it a little funny because girl, you kinda had it coming.

The whole scene of Penelope revealing the money she made with Whistledown and Colin's, Eloise's and Portia's reactions.

And I'm probably forgetting other parts. It has now been confirmed as well that a lot of the reshoots were to make the season more light-hearted, more romcom, and they had Colin be less angry than he originally was in the script (notably after their wedding breakfast), so even if I resent that dreadful wig they put on my poor man, I'm so grateful the season remains, overall, more romcom than true drama like the other seasons could have been, because at the end of the day, this is the love story of two friends who already cared so deeply for each other. Honestly, I'd argue the true angst of the season came more from Eloise's and Penelope's rekindling friendship (and also Cressida's home life) (the true love triangle).

And speaking of truly knowing one another, let's go back to the one thing that brought Colin and Penelope together: the letters.

Note how loosely bound Penelope's letters to Colin were compared to the other pile, because he has kept them with him during his travels this past summer and kept rereading them when she did not respond back. And just like the letters (or lack thereof) were the first clues that something had shifted in their relationship and Colin realises how much he misses her, her letters also become the reason he reconciles Penelope with Whistledown because oh yeah, the writing is the same, clever, sharp, and beautiful, just like his Penelope. As he rereads them, he realises how he himself overlooked Penelope for so long, how he was compelled by her quill, how powerful it was that they made him feel more confident and how their absence made his sense of self crumble. The same way, upon his return, Whistledown calling him out, shattered that new self he had tried so hard to build. Penelope was the reason he found his confidence, then lost himself when she did not respond, and the reason he had to look inward when, through Whistledown, she saw through his facade.

But also isn't it sweet, that he unknowingly always praised her writing? Of her letters obviously, but of Whistledown as well. For all his negative feelings about the gossip column, one thing he always admitted is how clever Whistledown is, hence why he did not even believe Cressida could actually be her. Deep down, he's always admired her writing, even if he did not realise it was her yet. He was so attached to her letters after all.

And speaking of writing? Penelope becomes his muse.

That is him writing about Penelope's debut, proving he's always paid attention to her, between this, him being the one to bring up how they met, and recalling all the times Eloise kept bringing up Penelope in conversations. And he's writing all of this after the church dance scene! After Penelope's declared her love for him and how she's loved him for years! He was lamenting that love made him so simple he could not write a single word, but it is love that fuelled his mind once more and broke his writer's block. And then in the epilogue, he is so proud to say Penelope helped him edit his book, he who, a couple of episodes earlier, was so determined to do this on his own to prove himself, now his pride is that he worked together with his wife and they are building a family, and a writing empire, together.

The season ends as they kiss in front of the very window Penelope often sat in front of, overlooking Bridgerton house, hoping to catch a glimpse of Colin, who now will always be looking at her first. They also now have the heir to the Featherington barony, and they inherit the very house with the garden where Colin first broke Penelope's heart, then mended it by offering his help, then where they shared their first kiss. It is theirs now.

And it's just! They're so in love! I have no other words (also this post is so long, I am getting tired myself I probably sound like a broken record by now).

Conclusion

I think Bridgerton s3 has officially become a comfort watch. I'm never one to really rewatch shows, but this specific season has joined the small list I have. As already mentioned, when it comes to romance, friends to lovers has always been a favourite and Polin is such a good depiction of the trope. They're the gigglers on the side of balls, the ones who did not so much seek the centre stage but were thrown in the middle of it, which fits so well even on a meta perspective because Luke and Nicola admitted they sure did not expect their season to come this early either. They won't be the most popular couple, perhaps, but my God, they are mine. Despite the length of this post, I think I probably still forgot some points but oh well, gotta stop somewhere and I'm sure people more eloquent than I made posts as well.

This season was not perfect, I have a lot more gripes about it than this long post makes it sound like (although they're mostly non-polin related or something about the production), but I like to focus on the positives. And for all its flaws, s3 sure knew how to deliver a sweet romance between two outcasts who found their home with each other.

And with that, dearest gentle readers, this humble author - or rather, this person who fancies themself an author at their lost hours - finally lets their old keyboard rest, and hopes you have enjoyed this long read into a mind with too many thoughts about a gentle, kind man who has a lot of love to give and a fierce, passionate woman who wants to be loved.

(The sweetest little parallel to end this on, ever since s1, he's always seen her <3)

#THIS IS A LONG RIDE YALL GOOD LUCK #bridgerton #bridgerton spoilers #bridgerton thoughts #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #polin #eloise bridgerton #peneloise #yes im tagging them too!#portia featherington #character analysis #long post #star.txt #the beginning of this post is lowkey just me arguing peneloise is as canon as polin /j #also posting this as pride month ends but just know polin are demisexual in my heart

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maggiecheungs · 1 year ago

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poems in episode one of the story of kunning palace

in episode 1 of kunning palace, xuening grabs a book of poems in order to trick her maids into thinking she keeps a ledger. my knowledge of classical chinese isn't particularly high level, but it's good enough to at least identify which poems are on the page that she opens to, and i'm certain they were deliberately chosen because of their relevance to the characters and themes of the show 👀 so i thought i'd do a post about them :)

this page contains three poems by the tang dynasty poet wang changling (698–756): 芙蓉樓送辛漸 (farewell to xin jian at lotus tower); 閨怨 (boudoir lament); and 春宮曲 (spring palace song). detailed analyses under the cut:

1 - 芙蓉樓送辛漸 (farewell to xin jian at lotus tower):

my translation

poem summary: the poet's friend came to wu on a night when cold rain was pouring into the river, and departs again at dawn. the poet accompanies him on his journey as far as the chu mountains [but cannot carry on journeying with him because he must stay at his official post in wu]. as he bids goodbye, he asks his friend to tell his family back in luoyang that his heart is still pure and resolute.

key themes: loneliness and solitude; duty; having a pure heart and noble character

analysis: this one is a fairly famous poem about parting before setting off on a long journey. it's particularly notable for its final line, 一片冰心在玉壺, which roughly translates to "my heart is as pure as a piece of ice within a vessel of jade"... which could easily have been written as a summary of zhang zhe's character.

however! while there's a definite emphasis on having a pure and guiltless heart, when you combine with the previous line, the couplet as a whole also gives a sense that the speaker wishes to be remembered by those they love as someone pure and righteous ("tell my family back in luoyang that my heart is still pure etc"). this seems to be a theme of xuening's second life: wanting to correct her past wrongs and treat the people she cares for better, and to prove to zhang zhe that she can be a good person in future

in particular, this poem makes me think of xuening's last moments in her first life. the poet's final request before he bids farewell to his friend? for his companion to tell his family that he is still noble at heart. xuening's final request before she dies? for xie wei to take her life in exchange for that of zhang zhe, as her way of repenting for being dishonourable and ruining his life... 🤔🤔🤔

2 - 閨怨 (boudoir lament):

poem summary: the young wife in her boudoir knows nothing of sorrow, but as she completes her toilette and ascends the emerald tower, she suddenly sees the hue of poplars and willows on the roadside and regrets letting her husband leave home to pursue official position and power.

key themes: love and marriage; abandonment; ambition (and the effect that ambition has on love)

analysis: it's essentially about how the husband's ambition causes him to abandon his wife to grief and loneliness, which seems like a clear parallel with xuening's willingness to abandon her faithful lovers for the sake of her ambition; there's also the implication that political status is ultimately less meaningful than a loving marriage.

i think it's worth noting that the character 怨 (yuan) in the title is fairly hard to translate, as it implies a mixture of grief and anger/resentment, or even hatred. it's fairly common in boudoir poems about women left behind by their husbands, and in that context it's often translated as 'lament' or 'grief', but i think the ambivalence of the term is fairly important, particularly if you apply it to kunning palace and the mix of grief and anger that xuening inspires in her old lovers in her first life.

3 - 春宮曲 (spring palace song):

poem summary: the wind is mild, the flowers are in full bloom, the moon is full and bright. the emperor has fallen in love with one of his sister's singing serving women, and is showering her with imperial favour and bestowing brocade robes upon her to keep out the spring chill.

key themes: happiness, success, security. (however, with contextual knowledge, there's also the implication of future doom, and that nobody can stay on top of the world forever)

analysis: i didn't quite catch the full significance of this one until i googled it and realised it's a poem about a real historical figure: wei zifu, a song-and-dance girl serving the princess pingyang, who wins the favour of pingyang’s brother, emperor wu of the han dynasty, eventually becoming his second empress (the second-longest serving empress in chinese history!).

wei zifu's story is essentially about a young woman of humble origins who survives numerous palace intrigues and eventually manages to ascend to the position of empress, trusted by the emperor to the extent that she was allowed to rule in his absence. however, after maintaining her position for over three decades, she eventually fell afoul of a conspiracy against her and her son, and committed suicide rather than allowing herself to be deposed.

i mean… the way this links to jiang xuening's first life is so obvious i don't even feel the need to explain it.

#story of kunning palace #cdrama #wang changling #my translations #well. sort of #more like my paraphrases i guess(?)#if i made any mistakes then i apologise! and feel free to correct anything ofc #i'm currently trying my hand at a polished translation of the first poem... i'll post it if it's any good #just need to finish fiddling with it first #王昌齡 #宁安如梦 #i am loving this drama so far btw <3

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castien-ffxiv · 3 months ago

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Joie de Vivre

Mistake/Wild: Day 5 @daily-writing-challenge

It felt as if the past handful of weeks had been eons. She often wondered what Cyrus had been doing in their time apart. More often than not Castien had spent her time on ships when she wasn’t sailing the seas beneath sails and wading surfs she had taken up odd jobs at the Smoking Crow in Black Water Bay or upholding commissions that took full advantage of her skill set.

Crimson eyes traveled across the darkness to her companions whom she had been traveling the past few days with. The Lady Gray hadn’t been someone she was too accustomed to knowing but had been learning little by little during the journey they had been embarking upon within the wilds of Yak T’el malms from Tuliyoyall and the comforts of the seas that she had found peace within.

Wren she knew even less of aside from the fact she had been Ward to the Lady Gray and from what Castien could tell, the two were close but they kept the relationship professional – close friends more than the norm for what an employer and employee would be.

Then there was the Lady Cress, Vahalia. Still, quite the mystery as the woman often kept her private life under lock and key.

Smirking, Castien continued to carve at the curve of the piece in her hand, having worked at it for some hours now, “The lads back home must be quite jealous of our outing.” she mused with some mild jubilant snark while whittling away.

“Nary such for myself,” Wren replied and Cordelia simply remained quiet. The book within the Lady Gray's hand must have kept her attention far better than the conversation, or perhaps, it was simply a pleasant excuse.

“And you?” Castien gazed to Vahalia.

The Lady Cress only afforded Castien the slightest of smirks and a shake of her head, “I’m certain details will have to be shared though to their dismay it might not be as interesting as they play it up to be in their mind.”

“So there is someone within the darkened halls of yours?” Castien asked blowing the slivers of curled wood from the piece, listing forward she handed it off towards Vahalia.

Taking the wooden carving, Vahalia turned it over in her hand as the piece itself seemed to be very much a small gift for her. The slope and shape of the item depicted that of a tulip-shaped bell sans any true detailing but it was quality in and of itself. There was no mistaking that this had been carved with Vahalia in mind, “Yes. Though it matters little.” she finally responded to Castien, remembering something she had been privy to several months prior, “You and Cyrus though, I recall Cyrus asking me for wood of great calibur for you when you both had seized the most recent ship some moons ago.”

A small nod came and Castien pulled another piece from her bag, half-finished but it was easily starting to resemble that of a moth’s wing, “If that is your subtle way of asking if he and I are together, then yes.” the knife continued to work away at the soft wood and a few blows expelled from Castien again to rid the work of debris, “Quite the odd way we happened to meet though it makes for an interesting story. Caught him out hard on his luck and while he was in need for work I directed him to Ishgard. That is where he came upon Eivor, Carrera and eventually you.” she bobbed her head towards Vahalia, “Bit of a wild thing that man if you haven’t noticed.”

“I have but the said could be said of you, Bancroft.” Vahalia swiftly replied, “Don’t think I haven’t noticed the tell-tale signs.”

Castien paused and her red eyes pinned across to Vahalia before cutting to Cordeila and Wren nearby. Cordi was still enveloped in her book though Wren looked rather intrigued.

“Worry not.” Vahalia laughed, “To make you an enemy would mean to make one of myself. It seems we all are familiar with the same dark halls. Make no mistake, you’re well within your proper circle here.”

For a brief moment, Castien caught a looming sensation that lingered in the darkness behind Vahalia, the space before her between Wren and Cordelia illuminated well by the fire's light but still, she had felt less of a threat enclosing the space and more at peace with the notion of being somewhere she belonged; darkness included.

Outside of Cyrus – these were her people.

Mention(s): @cyrus-black - @promethea-silk - @vahalia-cress - @song-of-wren

#Stories #Blurbs #DWC #Daily Writing Challenge #Day 5 #DWC Day 5 #augustday52024 #augustdwc2024 #FFXIV #FF14 #Balmung

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0junemeatcleaver0 · 9 months ago

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ℑ𝔫𝔱𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔲𝔠𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫

Muta Cupido; An examination of Roman sexual morality, what makes a man a vir, the practice of oratorical celibacy, and the appetites of both a mortal man and monster.

Ages ago, I wrote a quick-n-dirty meta (which I will link to later in this post). At the time, I was quite proud of it. But after having done my last Marius deep dive, all of my previous metas now look lackluster to me. Consider this to be the updated version of the original meta. It is not necessary to have read the previous meta before this one, though those of you who have (and even those of you who haven’t) should be able to pick up what I’m putting down before I even link to the original.

That being said, I would suggest that you do read this companion piece I wrote about what (in the mind of a Roman) made a man, a man. It’s a relatively short read, and will help add more context to the short discussion on the same topic later in this post.

A quick note before anyone tries to jump up my ass (again): I view meta as serving the same purpose as fic, just via a different methodology. Where in fic you dream up scenarios to put the characters through to see how they might act in those situations, I feel meta is a way of taking what we know canonically about the character and attempting to recontextualize the facts with additional information. Just as there are nearly infinite equations one can use to reach a sum, so too are there different ways a single character might end up the person we read on the page. In short: This post is meant to be a thought experiment and you’d have to be some kind of fool to think its author is proclaiming herself some kind of authority on the subject.

𝔖𝔢𝔵𝔲𝔞𝔩 ℌ𝔢𝔞𝔩𝔱𝔥 𝔦𝔫 𝔄𝔫𝔠𝔦𝔢𝔫𝔱 ℜ𝔬𝔪𝔢

The time of Pliny the Elder and the four humors; a time when medical theories that seem ignorant to the modern mind were rife. And while I could spend quite a long time dunking on the science of yesteryear, I’ll keep things brief by only focusing on ideas surrounding sexual health–especially where it pertains to the sexual health of men.

As pictured above, one very important aspect of health for a male was the regulation of semen. Semen was a very important bodily fluid, as it was thought to be made via a mix of (the humor) blood and pneuma (“vital air”) and was believed to be the fuel on which internal organs ran.

Blood and semen, in fact, were so inextricably linked in the Roman mind that the two would be even poetically coupled throughout different texts in oft times violent ways. Aya Betensky says in Lucretius and Love:

“Let us begin with Lucretius’ Venus in De Rerum Natura 4. He introduces her as a physiologically as possible, moving from a discussion of dreams to wet dreams and then to the mechanics of ejaculation, which he shows mockingly to be the body’s enactment of the romantic expression ‘wound of love’. Semen is equated with blood spurting out of a wound. (4. 1049-1056)”.

Greek physician Galen warns in his treatise On Semen that exorbitant sexual activity would result in a loss of pneuma and thus, vitality:

“It is not at all surprising that those who are less moderate sexually turn out to be weaker, since the whole body loses the purest part of both substances, and there is besides an accession of pleasure, which by itself is enough to dissolve the vital tone, so that before now some persons have died from excess of pleasure.”

As detailed further in this post’s companion piece, the rules for manhood were highly prescriptive to the Romans. Every man of good moral standing concerned with their own virtus would have also been weary of losing too much semen–whether through promiscuity or nocturnal emissions.

As Catharine Edwards states in The Politics of Immorality in Ancient Rome:

“Morality and manliness [were considered] the distinguishing features of Rome.”

And while Rome’s mos maiorum were such a public affair (indeed, these customs and social norms functioned almost as some sort of morality play each citizen was expected to participate in while in public), these expectations leaked into even the most private sectors of citizen’s lives–including the bedroom.

Robert Sharp speaking about how censores regulated the public in Incontinentia, Licentia et Libedo: The Juxtaposition of Morality and Sexuality during the Roman Republic.

Indeed, a lack of control over the self (which included being able to appropriately manage one’s sex life) indicated that a man was incapable of governing others–a highly detrimental accusation in the heyday of the Paterfamilias. As per Catharine Edwards in Unspeakable Professions: Public Performance and Prostitution in Ancient Rome:

“The enjoyment of ‘low sensual pleasure’ threatened to erode the elite male’s identity as a cultured person”.

Still yet, there were some men for whom this fear of loss of masculine potency loomed larger than most.

Because a loss of pneuma was thought to cause a whole host of physical ailments–but most importantly to this discussion slow mindedness, an ‘effeminate’ voice, and general weakness of character–the men perhaps most concerned with keeping hold of their pneuma were orators.

One such orator was C. Licinius Calvus (born 82 BCE, died possibly in 47 BCE). In Natural History, Pliny the Elder name checks Calvus during a discussion of medical uses for lead. Because Calvus took to putting lead plates on his kidneys to combat having wet dreams. John Dugan says in Preventing Ciceronianis: C. Licinius Calvus’ Regimens for Sexual and Oratorical Self-Mastery:

“Pliny, moreover, connects this therapy with Calvus’ literary activity, stipulating that the orator’s treatment was designed to ‘preserve the strength of his body for the labor of his studies’.”

The oratorial obsession with preventing wet dreams isn’t where the scholarly preoccupation with keeping one’s seminal fluid to one’s self ended, either. As per the Encyclopedia Britannica:

“As classical civilization developed, two ideals of masculine celibacy appeared, that of the ascetic philosopher and that of the priest of the mystery religions. [...] Pythagoras (c. 580 BC - c. 500) established a small community that emphasized study, vegetarianism, and sexual restraint or abstinence. Many later philosophers believed that celibacy is conducive to the detachment and equilibrium required by the philosopher’s calling. The Stoic philosopher Epictetus (AD 55- C. 135) for example, held that the ideal teacher would be unmarried and that his task would require freedom from the cares of family life.”

𝔈𝔭𝔦𝔠𝔲𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔫𝔦𝔰𝔪, 𝔖𝔱𝔬𝔦𝔠𝔦𝔰𝔪, 𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔖𝔢𝔵𝔲𝔞𝔩 𝔐𝔬𝔯𝔞𝔩𝔦𝔱𝔶 𝔦𝔫 𝔄𝔫𝔠𝔦𝔢𝔫𝔱 ℜ𝔬𝔪𝔢

Now that we’ve gotten a taste of how physicians viewed sexual activity, we’ll move on to what the philosophers thought on the subject.

There were two major schools of philosophy in Ancient Rome–Epicureanism and Stoicism. Epicureanism was a philosophy that taught that pleasure was the highest good and the thing through which you could attain tranquility and freedom from fear and physical pain. Stoicism was the philosophy that taught that life was best lived in harmony with reason, was based in knowledge, and showed a complete indifference to pain and pleasure.

𝔈𝔭𝔦𝔠𝔲𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔫 𝔖𝔢𝔵𝔲𝔞𝔩 𝔐𝔬𝔯𝔞𝔩𝔦𝔱𝔶

Within Epicurean thought, pleasure was believed to be the highest good. According to the Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy:

“Epicurus’ ethics is a form of egoistic hedonism; i,e., he says that the only thing that is intrinsically valuable is one’s own pleasure; anything that has value is valuable merely as a means to securing pleasure for oneself.”

To Epicurus, pleasure simply meant satisfying one’s desires. He believed there to be two types of desire, “moving” and “static”. Moving desire happens when one is actively fulfilling the desire, such as eating when you feel hungry. Static desire occurs after fulfillment, i.e. feeling comfortably full after eating. He goes on to state he believes that static pleasure is the best form of pleasure. From IEoP:

“If pleasure results from getting what you want (desire-satisfaction) and pain from not getting what you want (desire-frustration), then there are two strategies you can pursue with respect to any given desire: you can either strive to fulfill the desire, or you can try to eliminate the desire. For the most part, Epicurus advocates the second strategy, that of paring your desires down to a minimum core, which are then easily satisfied.”

Epicurus divided desire into three categories:

Natural and necessary (food, drink, shelter, and personal safety)

Natural and unnecessary (things which will give you pleasure but lacking these things will not make your life impossible and/or unbearable)

Unnatural and unnecessary (desire for social standing, political power, fame, and glory)

He places sex in this second category.

Later thinkers in this school of thought–namely Lucretius–would take harsher stances on sexual desire. Male desire, specifically, being viewed as pathological, frustrating, and violent (at least according to Robert D. Brown in Lucretius on Love and Sex [1987])–which is perhaps why Lucretius preached an ambivalent view of sex.

Lucretius treated the sex drive as muta cupido, comparing the physiological response of ejaculation to blood spurting from a wound (again, via Brown in Lucretius on Love and Sex [1987]).

𝔖𝔱𝔬𝔦𝔠 𝔖𝔢𝔵𝔲𝔞𝔩 𝔐𝔬𝔯𝔞𝔩𝔦𝔱𝔶

This school of thought emphasized sex within marriage as a way of fortifying an institution that helped to sustain social order. Such was this emphasis that by modern standards, we might consider these fathers of this philosophy to be homophobic (though that would be looking at things through a rather narrow and myopic lens)--Musonius disapproved of same-sex relations due to their lack of ability to create offspring. Seneca and Epictetus, meanwhile, merely favored male-female pairings over same sex couplings due to their ability to procreate.

While these views surrounding same sex relations could be considered problematic by modern minds, the Stoics were more egalitarian in their thoughts surrounding highly gendered rules and how they opened people (mainly men) to hypocrisy–at least for the time.

Indeed, both Musonius and Seneca believed if men wanted to exercise authority over women because they believed themselves to be in possession of greater self control, then those men ought to be able to manage their sex drives.

This, of course, is not akin to the sex positivity movement of today, but rather a call for all good citizens–male and female–to control their baser urges so as not to embarrass the Republic. The (for lack of a better term) proto-feminism only went so far, as Seneca–staunchly against adultery–believed it was worse for a wife to cheat on her husband than for a husband to cheat on his wife.

Kathy L. Gaca in her book The Making of Fornication: Eros, Ethics and Political Reform in Greek Philosophy and Early Christianity states that Seneca also believed that a wise man should make love to his wife by exercising good judgment (iudicium) and not emotion (affectus). Though this is a much stricter stance than taken by other Stoics, who largely saw sex as a means of promoting affection between married couples.

But while Stoicism at least at first glance seems to take a more even keeled approach to the topic, it was not above fear mongering about the perils of the human sex drive. In her book, Gaca cites Ad Helviam (13:3), stating:

“To Seneca, sexual desire for pleasure (libido) is a ‘destructive force (exitium) insidiously fixed in the innards’. Unregulated, it becomes cupiditas (lust).”

And here is where I risk losing those of you who didn’t put two and two together until this moment. AKA: I think Marius died a virgin and in this essay I will…

Or, more accurately, since this theory relies on a blending of canon and my research, let us make a melange of sorts.

ℑ𝔫��𝔯𝔢𝔡𝔦𝔢𝔫𝔱𝔰 𝔏𝔦𝔰𝔱

For the purpose of keeping things contained to this post, here is a quick summary of the original post:

Marius never mentions taking a shine to anyone while still a mortal

When speaking of his time as a mortal, he never alludes to being a part of any hedonistic activity, though he does admit to documenting the indiscretions of others

He’s only known to have been attracted to one person (Pandora) as a mortal, who he never got with romantically or sexually

And before it gets brought up, I’ll address the passage in Prince Lestat where Teskhamen speaks to Marius and says:

“[...] I saw your libraries, I saw and heard your quick-witted and curious companions, I saw the full blooming power of your experience, the life of a cultured Roman, the life that had made you what you were. I saw the beauty of Italy. I saw the beauty of fleshly love. I saw the beauty of ideas. I saw the beauty of the sea.[...]”

This passage was pointed out to me on my original post. Before we continue, I want to make something clear: I don’t think anyone is wrong for reading this passage as meaning that Marius was party to that ‘fleshly love’. I think it’s ambiguous enough that it could go either way.

My whole reasoning for personally not buying this as evidence against my current theory is a matter of language. Teskhamen front-loads this passage with language that focuses on Marius’ experience. It’s Marius’ library, Marius’s companions, Marius’ life as a cultured Roman. The second half of the passage removes possessive language from the equation entirely and instead focuses solely on the beauty of all he saw–Italy, pleasure, ideas, the sea.

The remoteness of this language coming directly after the language that detailed Marius’ specific lived experience reads as a line of delineation to me. The things Marius did, and then the things Marius witnessed.

This, of course, is in no way meant to be an argument about authorial intent. If I had to guess, Anne wasn’t focused on the preciseness of language here, but rather catching the flow of Teskhamen’s speech patterns. In short, it’s not that deep–it’s just a peculiarity of the writing that stuck out to me and I think lends itself to being read one of two ways. After all, Marius is not responsible for how beautiful the sea or Italy is, nor is he the sole thinker who had every beautiful idea and–it stands to reason, in my opinion, due to these things being grouped together–not necessarily the one participating in the fleshly love.

Moving on.

I’d like to continue my summation by detailing what it is we know (canonically) of Marius’ personality:

Marius (whether he intends to or not) carries his Roman ideals about what makes a good man into the modern age, as called out by Pandora on page 57 of Blood Communion.

Mortal Marius was noticeably odd and aloof. Pandora (again) calls this out on page 54 of Pandora, saying:

“In the crowd, I saw Marius. He looked at me, then back to his book. So strange. I saw him standing against a tree trunk and writing. No one did this–stand against a tree, hold a book in one hand and write with the other. The slave stood beside him with a bottle of ink.”

Showcasing yet again how Marius was still–at around thirty years of age–more invested in documenting fun instead of having any himself (this scene was, after all, set during Saturnalia).

I say ‘still’ because Marius himself says this on page 397 in The Vampire Lestat:

“I’d come to Massilia after a long and studious journey that had taken me through all the great cities of the Empire. TO Alexandria, Pergamon, Athens I’d traveled, observing and writing about the people, and now I was making my way through the cities of Roman Gaul.”

And again in TVL (page 397), the rowdiest he admits to getting is this:

“By the age of twenty, I'd become the scholar and the chronicler, the one who raised his voice at drunken banquets to settle historical and military arguments.”

This identity as a chronicler–while cemented in his twentieth year–carried on into his fortieth year, as we see him still writing his own chronicles when approached by Mael in the tavern from which he was kidnapped (TVL, page 398).

This all, of course, is a rough sketch of Marius as a character and I am obviously relying on you to fill in any gaps with your own understanding of him as he appears on page. After all, it would take quite a while to transcribe every moment where Marius was particularly Roman, weird, scholarly, or restrained. Keep your own favorite instances in mind as we move on to the next bit:

𝔏𝔢𝔱'𝔰 𝔐𝔞𝔨𝔢 𝔞 𝔖𝔬𝔲𝔭

It is my belief that it makes a lot of sense that Marius (especially if you buy into the “Marius was never a senator” theory) being a man who values his identity as a Roman man and an intellectual, would buy fully into practicing celibacy as a way to protect his mental acuity.

It was a common enough medical practice in his day, he obviously highly values his intellect, he was very serious about and dedicated to his scholarly undertakings, if ineligible for a political position he might want to win the respect of his fellow men of good standing by becoming something of a historian/philosopher, he’d only been very attracted to a woman he couldn’t marry anyway, and he was a bit of an off putting weirdo (affectionate) to boot.

Marius has been shown to exhibit respect for the great thinkers of his time (name checking Xenophon, Herodotus and Poseidonius on page 399 of TVL alone) and it’s not much of a stretch (especially when paired with his habit of loudly and forcefully arguing at banquets) to assume he had a great deal of respect for orators and their craft.

Whether Marius were ever a fan of Calvus is up to debate–Calvus died one to two decades before Marius was born (there is no record of Calvus’ exact year of death), he would have been recent history for Marius. Calvus’ poems would have still existed (in more than the fragments we have now), his speeches would have been spoken about, and was fairly well known in his time. My point is, orators were well respected as men and intellectuals and it wouldn’t shock me if Marius was a fan of any of them in specific or in general and that respect could have been the thing that kicked off any possible decision to remain celibate.

In short, I believe there are many plausible reasons why Marius may have died a virgin and I think all of these in combination would make a very fun space to play in, character-wise.

ℜ𝔢𝔰𝔬𝔲𝔯𝔠𝔢𝔰

https://www.jstor.org/stable/4349696?read-now=1&seq=10#page_scan_tab_contents

https://www.jstor.org/stable/1215514?read-now=1&seq=1#page_scan_tab_contents

https://www.jstor.org/stable/4349198?read-now=1&seq=2#page_scan_tab_contents

https://www.jstor.org/stable/270440?read-now=1&seq=1#page_scan_tab_contents

#the vampire chronicles #vampire chronicles #marius de romanus #marius #my meta stuff

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mysterious-moonstruck-musings · 9 months ago

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WIP Wednesday Thursday

I swear, I'm always a day late for this...but that's ok because I was busy working on several things. 😏 First up, I FINALLY got chapter 29 of Destiny & Deliverance started. I admit, I was stalling because I do not want it to end, but I think I have gotten my mojo back. Yesterday, some things happened in my brain that caused plans to change a bit with this chapter...among other things (I'll get to the other things in a minute). No ETA on when it will be done, but just know I am working on it. Since we have had a bit of a D & D drought, I offer a snippet to hold you over:

I was humming along with the radio that was just barely audible through the speakers in the living room and tucking socks into a drawer when a piece of clothing landed on my head. I sighed, pulling it from my face as I turned toward the door. I narrowed my eyes at Dieter, who was standing there in nothing but his black jeans with his arm leaned against the door frame above his head. He eyed me with a flirty smirk on his face. I scoffed, “What am I now, your dirty laundry basket?” I turned to throw his shirt into the hamper as he made his way over to me with a chuckle. His hands immediately snaked around my waist, pulling me tightly against him while his mouth searched out the spot behind my ear that always got me going. Instinctively, my fingers tangled into his hair. My humming turned into a heavy sigh as my skin broke out in goosebumps from his touch. This felt like a distraction. I managed to gather my thoughts well enough to focus on the news I had anxiously been waiting for. I tightened my grip on his hair, “How did the…ugh…meeting go?” He groaned, “Eso no es importante en este momento.” Taking a minute to translate that to the best of my ability, I pulled away slightly, tilting his head by his hair to make him look at me. “Por qué?”

These two...are going to be too much. Just sayin...🥰😏 Anyone want to take a stab at guessing what the meeting was about and why he is avoiding talking about it? Ok, so on to the other things...I know some of you caught it already when I posted yesterday, but I did want to share more details. So, I had planned to just do random outtakes for D & D from Dieter's POV as extras. Within about an hours' time, that all changed and now we have this. It will actually be a companion series called Light in the Darkness. It will be from Dieter's POV covering the events that take place in D & D. I already have the outline done and the chapter titles posted. Now, the question is, how well can I channel my inner emotionally unstable man and write his breakdown from his POV. That remains to be seen. I plan to work on this while I work on Closed Position. I figure it may be good to have something less dark to work on at the same time. Otherwise, I may melt into an emotional mess. You will probably notice, the images for the header of this fic (below) contrast from D & D. We are going to get a lot of insight on Dieter's feelings when it comes to Talia. The intimacy and connection between them is something that is on his mind... A LOT. Not necessarily in regard to sex either. It's something he has never experienced, and it is ultimately what changes him. It should be interesting to explore his side of things and see what he was going through when he wasn't with Talia.

Tag List: @rhoorl @bitchwitch1981 @readingiskeepingmegoing @runningmom94 @for-a-longlongtime @hisandsnakes @chaoticfestninja @survivingandenduring @partyofone3413 @wannab-urs @cakipy-blog @titlee78 @poodlebae @guelyury @missladym1981 @maried01 @alokaerza @samiamproductions @misstokyo7love @themonadiaries-blog @madnessofadaydreamer @darkheartgatita @avastrasposts @weho2kcmo @harriedandharassed @tkchaos @girlofchaos @yghuibt @musings-of-a-rose @annieispunk @sarcasm-theotherwhitemeat @copperhalfcent @bunniboo0015 @indiegirlunited

#dieter bravo #dieter bravo fic #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal character fanfic #Destiny & Deliverance Series #Light in the Darkness Series #destiny & deliverance teaser #light in the darkness teaser

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babyfairy · 20 days ago

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i did it 🥹 i have so much to say lol.

this game is so special! the original SH2 is such a wonderfully made game, and i like to think of the remake as a companion piece for the original, because i think they both bring things to the table that are really interesting. i love that people are jumping in and playing SH2 for the first time with this remake. it’s one of the best horror games ever made in my opinion, and silent hill as a franchise getting some fresh eyes on it is really exciting for me. fingers crossed for a SH1/SH3 remake as well 🤞🏼

the sound design in the original was masterfully done, and i was super excited to see that it’s the same in the remake. love that they kept so much of the original sound design intact. it is genuinely so scary lol. there were portions where the ambient noise and music was scaring me more than anything else.

my FAVORITE element of SH2 has always been the nonsensical geography of things - it worked well on the ps2 and it works even better here, where everything is so detailed. areas start making less sense the further you go on, and it really lends itself to the feeling of claustrophobia, dread and anxiety you experience throughout the game. i got lost A LOT. i enjoyed every minute of being lost because of how deeply disturbing and detailed the environments are. highly recommend that anyone who plays this really go all out on exploration, because there are a lot of subtle details to be missed and it’s really fun and immersive to experience.

the voice acting in the original has a really specific feel to it, anyone who has played or watched will know what i mean - it’s sort of jarring and unnatural in an uncanny way, and sometimes a little corny, which i really don’t mind. it’s much more realistic in this version. i appreciate both for what they do for the game. i WILL say there’s a monologue at the end that the original did better, but to me, the monologue at the end of the original SH2 is one of the best in video games and simply can’t be beat. it’s heartwrenching. that being said, i think james’ voice in the remake is far superior! i loved the direction they went with it. i love the way everyone was characterized. 100% wouldn’t change a thing about it.

the monsters are so scary! even on light combat (don’t laugh) it felt like they were whooping my ASS, the mannequins in particular are scary as fuck this time around. the boss fights are excellent too, and every single one of them is an improvement from the original, ESPECIALLY the first pyramid head fight and the abstract daddy. the latter is one of the most tense and uncomfortable boss fights in any game i’ve ever played, and i won’t spoil it too much for anyone who hasn’t played the game and may be interested, but wow. i’ll probably try regular combat for this next playthrough, but i’m too much of a wimp to try it on hard mode!!! it’s too scary!!!

i’ve already started new game+ LOL, can’t wait to experience it all over again!

#the hospital and the prison were both so scary btw i was on the verge of shitting myself the whole time #p

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sil-writes-fiction-too · 11 months ago

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The Most Precious Thing In The World

Gale x OC!Tav

Genre: Fluff

A/N: this is a one-shot inspired by my ongoing run in Baldur's Gate 3 and the new epiloge that's been added to the game. @wolfhunter89 gave me the idea for this piece, so thank you bestie! This is not an x Reader one-shot, so if you do not like this sort of content, go ahead and click off of this post. Summer was my very first D&D character and I am currently playing as her in my BG3 run. She is a tiefling sorceress.

Summer would usually never find herself inside a classroom. She believes she has endured enough boring lectures as a child, way back when she still lived in Ferox with her parents and all the kids her age had to attend the local school. She can hardly remember any of the notions she was supposed to learn, unsurprisingly, and in the past she has vowed to never set foot in another one of these places ever again. Despite all that, she couldn't be more excited to be here, right now.

She feels a little bit silly sitting among all these young, aspiring, bright-eyed wizards that are simply hanging from their mentor's lips, hungry for knowledge, while she is simply here for... well, their mentor.

Gale's voice is clear and passionate as usual while he explains a concept that seems to fill him with enthusiasm and fascination. She's always liked his voice, since the very beginning, even though at first she often found it difficult to grasp what exactly he was saying, with all the embellished words he would use and the poetical way in which he would speak. She wouldn't change it for the world.

She can't believe it took her so long to finally attend one of his lectures. It's already been, what, eight months since their adventure ended and she accompanied him back to Waterdeep as his bride-to-be? Granted, she had her plate full with having to find an occupation for herself and... slowly getting used to life in her new home. After all, Summer is a free spirit, an adventurer at heart. Settling down was never really in her plans, especially after the Jaime fiasco, so naturally she needed time to adjust.

For a while she was worried she would wake up one day, realize she made a huge mistake and answer the adventurer's call, inevitably breaking Gale's heart... but it never happened. Instead, she found herself looking forward to her return home each time she embarked on a mission for the guild, whether it brought her outside of Waterdeep... or barely outside her own neighborhood. It soon became clear that whatever happened during her travels through Faerûn changed her, that Gale had a positive influence on her and that perhaps she, as well, had a positive influence on him.

None of the letters sent to Arwen since they parted ways expressed grievances over her companion, something that would instead frequently happen when Jaime was still around. She's simply, completely, absolutely in love with him, and seeing him right now in front of his students and looking so happy just... makes her feel at peace with the world.

She remembers laughing when he first came home to tell her he would start teaching, because she couldn't think of any other profession that was so... Gale. It filled her heart with content and enthusiasm, even though she couldn't quite understand why at the time. She has never felt like this for anyone in her life. She could understand the desire for connection, but being so fully invested in someone else that suddenly their victories become your own? That each and every small detail about them suddenly feels like the most precious thing in the world? That their happiness and well-being become your main goal in life? That was all unknown to her, until the day she met him.

She can't believe how quick she fell, and yet it only makes sense to her. Any other outcome seems absurd now. Since the very first day he managed to charm her, and not even once has he overstepped her boundaries or disrespected her. Not even once has he judged her for her less than ideal control of her magic, despite him being such a formidable wizard. He shared every part of himself with her and in turn she did the same with him, and they both moved forward together, grew together... broke each other free from their shackles. She can no longer imagine a life without him.

It is while she is lost in these musings, that the voice she loves oh so much suddenly pulls her out of her thoughts and back into the present.

“Pardon the long wait, I must've gotten carried away there,” he chuckles to himself, slightly swinging his arms in a sheepish manner.

With a quick look around her, Summer realizes that the lecture must've come to an end while she was so deep in thought. She can't help but smile when she brings her gaze back towards Gale and her heart almost blooms in her chest. He raises a quizzical brow at her, clearly amused by her seemingly exaggerated reaction at his presence. “What is it?” he asks.

She gets up from her seat, tail swinging happily from side to side as she wraps her arms around his neck and presses her lips to his in a kiss that catches him by surprise.

“I'm proud of you.”

#my writing #bg3 #bg3 gale #gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #gale x tav #gale x oc #baldur's gate 3 #gale fluff #gale fanfic #bg3 fanfiction

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cruisie · 4 months ago

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Thinking about just saying things about Renzo.

Like him meeting and getting used to Bug if he and Arlie were the ones to find them in the trap.

Maybe Renzo would hesitant to speak around them at first, leaving Arlie to do the talking. She'd be quite ecstatic at the chance to have a visitor, if not, a little wary of the odd occurrence of a human in the swamps. Eventually, it's agreed that the injured Bug would accompany them back to their home before dusk fell to heal and eat a proper meal.

Arlie on one side, making small conversation with the bug, asking their reasons for being in the swamp and chastising them for not coming in a group so this kind of mess wouldn't happen, and Renzo on the other side, carefully and quietly pushing forwards as to not jostle them anymore as they traveled south.

Towards their mountain home.

Upon arriving to their hidden abode, the first thing the hunter would notice would be the many decorative pieces of shiny metals, sea glass, and shells above them as they settle onto a chair so the two half-bloods can bandage them before dinner.

Maybe he is left alone with them after Arlie gathers enough spare blankets pillows to form a makeshift bed on a large bench and slips away to rest herself. He finally speaks when Bug asks him about the hanging sea glass ornaments, softly explaining that both him and his otter companion collect whatever odd ins and outs they've nabbed to decorate their shared space.

A small hobby that they both adopted to try and make the once barren space more...home.

Maybe he starts to point out his favorite pieces, going into probably more detail than he'd like a admit, rambling slightly as he recalls the exact places where he found them. He'd pause for a moment, sparing a look at Bug and awkwardly chuckles, apologizing in a soft tone for his enthusiasm before questioning if they liked any of the decore in particular.

Maybe after a while, Renzo notices their head gently nodding up and down, eyes slowly closing and reopening before they start to shut once more. He'd help them rise to their feet and shuffle their way to the makeshift bed, pressing them gently down when they try to wriggle onto their side, reminding them that their leg needs to be propped up to heal.

__________________________________________

Maybe he stays next to them for a just a bit longer after they fall asleep, dimming the fire in the hearth slowly. He throw a cautious eye to the human before turning, passing Arlies' door frame, listening in to the gentle snores for a moment, then tiredly trudging towards his own room with a yawn.

This is all purely hypothetical. I just wanted to imagine what would happen if my crocodile half-blood Renzo and otter half-blood found Bug in the trap instead of Bodie :>

Arlie would be hesitant but wouldn't be to keen on leaving anyone alone in the middle of a swamp whilst stuck in a bear trap. Half-blood or not, she'd feel too guilty.

Renzo would more or less feel the same. Although maybe a little less, he'd trust Arlies judgement, which hadn't let him down.

Yet 👀

#gator boys #gator boys oc #obsidian lantern #sirens son asmr #daysprite #capitalmaudios #mage bunkshelf #audio roleplay #oc

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thewrittenpaige · 6 months ago

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Because I am addicted now, I'm thinking of an roleswap AU featuring Amy taking Sonic's place in the plot, with a focus on Sonic Adventure 1. Major details being:

Eggman and Professor Gerald swap places. Gerald sees himself as the good guy who wants to create a safe and just world...The only problem is, most people don't like that his idea of "safe and just" involves setting himself up as ruler of everything. Using the badnik designs his grandfather Ivo created, he plans to make a world worthy of his beloved and sick niece, Maria.

Amy is the hero with a tendency to get in the way of the Professor's plans. With her hammer in hand and a strong sense of justice, Amy Adventure 1 (proper name pending) is only the latest of her adventures, after having stopped Gerald's Death Egg (better name pending), saving Angel Island, and protecting Little Planet. Now in Station Square, she's about to get roped into something new...

Cream is Amy's "sidekick", who helped her destroy the Death Egg (much to the complaints of her mother Vanilla). Cream doesn't seek out adventure like Amy does, but her desire to protect people often means she gets involved. While her role as Amy's closest friend is similar to Tails' from the Main Universe, her part in Amy Adventure is actually closer to Main!Amy's, as she meets a chao (who she names Cheese) fleeing with a special pendant from a dangerous badnik. Soon, she has to protect this little chao when nobody else will.

Rouge the Bat is the guardian of Angel Island, the last of the bat clan that has protected the Master Emerald for so long. Unlike the Main Universe Knuckles, who takes to his role rather well, Rouge is...frustrated with her job. She's dedicated to protecting her home and the Emerald (the latter of which she adores), she would never abandon her post, but ever since meeting Amy Rose and getting to see a small piece of the outside world, she wants more. When Chaos is unleashed by Professor Gerald and the Master Emerald is shattered across the region, she sees this as her chance to explore and get a taste of what the world is like. And if she can steal a few precious gems or neat toys? All the better.

Sonic's role is, oddly enough, closer to Tails' from Sonic Adventure 1. He works closely with Amy to stop Gerald and gather the Chaos Emeralds. He has a confusing relationship with Amy; she saved him when he was captured by Metal Amy back on Little Planet, and the two have a fairly close friendship because of that. That said, Amy's crush on him makes him uncomfortable, and it makes them have trouble working together sometimes. It's an issue they're working to get over. (Additionally, Amy and Sonic are both the same age for this AU.)

Tails takes the role of Big, with a little inspiration from Nine from Sonic Prime. Tails never met Sonic growing up, so he's more reclusive and less certain that he can trust others. From his workshop in the Mystic Ruins, he's created a robotic fox companion--the Prower Prowler, meant to be a pet as well as a bodyguard. But when the Prowler absorbs energy from Chaos and steals Tails' Chaos Emerald, the young loner is forced to find it--and maybe learn to trust others in the process.

Emerl is Professor Gerald's finest creation--a powerful robot capable of helping him gather the Chaos Emeralds to empower Chaos. A one-of-a-kind robot of a different kind than badniks, Emerl is very simple in thought, but will grow as time goes on. As Gerald's chief enforcer, Emerl must decide what he wants to be as he starts to learn and change, and whether or not Gerald has his best interests at heart.

I'm actually working on writing this AU as a fic, though it still has issues. Sonic feels like he needs a more concrete role and focus, for example, but generally I think this can be a really fun AU. Now to just finish the first chapter.

#sth #sonic the hedgehog #amy rose #emerl #cream the rabbit #rouge the bat #miles “tails” prower #AU #alternate universe #fic idea #courtly musings #amyswap au

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pavedinashes-if · 1 year ago

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lsdxoxo-sick bitch x I am going to eat your soul (slowed + reverb)

this song playing while D makes the most predatory eye contact with mc....and I will pray to any god to get their pov about mc and what they want to do to mc....🖤

a little snippet? feed us pleeeeeas with your amazing writing I am on my kneeeeees

Oh come on! Are you sincerely complimenting my writing or are you just really horny? Hmm?! 🤨

If you think I am that easy to sway you are absolutely…

…correct.

Here‘s Dalia‘s POV this time. BUT: no eye contact and just a tiny snippet. I need to torture you a bit, k? Enjoy.

- potential NSFW below -

She lets her eyes wander around the club. It's another successful night. Everything is taken care of. Fernando just left to attend to the VIPs, and she can do what she does best:

keep an eye out for any possible trouble …or opportunity.

Suddenly, her eyebrows furrow, a familiar scent intrudes into her nostrils. It's you. She turns her head, her eyes following you as you step further into the club, in the direction of the bar.

Interestingly, today you're in the company of two friends, one familiar and one not. She checks out the unfamiliar one from head to toe, estimating it'll take about 5 minutes to find out who this is, their relationship with you, and if they pose any potential risk to you.

But first, she has to focus on the important thing - you.

She leans against the steel beam, her eyes never leaving you, absorbing every detail.

What does your clothing say about your mood? Your intentions for tonight? Did you shower before leaving? Do you plan to find some company for the night?

You and your friends laugh. The unfamiliar companion heads to the bar, where Pepe is working today. Good, that should be one less problem. Your friend grabs your arm excitedly as they talk to you, and you seem unbothered. Okay, she decides you appear comfortable enough for her to focus on the more pleasant part.

Her eyes wander from your face to your neck, lingering, as you grab your necklace with one hand. She scowls. Ugh, that boy's necklace. Her eyes slowly wander further down, taking in every inch of your body, your scent still in her nose. Her heart begins to beat faster. Her gaze moves further down, devouring your silhouette.

Then you laugh heartily, and her eyes return to your face. First your eyes, then your lips. She wonders, are they soft or firm? What do they taste like? How would they feel against hers? She smirks a little, barely visible. How would they feel against her neck? On her collarbone, her breasts, her stomach… between her legs. The touch of your hair in between her fingers in a firm grip, the phantom touch feeling almost real as she clenches her fist and adjust her pose against the beam. Another deep breath. Her eyes then wandering down to your butt and she sligtly tilts her head. Mmh..

Her thoughts are interrupted by Fernando who suddenly appears next to her, handing her a glass of Macallan Lalique 50Y. She takes it with a short "Spasibo," Fernando nods in return. His eyes follow Dalia's gaze, and a smirk crosses his face.

She takes a sip and her attention returns to you and your body. Forgotten is Fernando, who also watches you intently as you dance, moving your body in perfect rhythm with the club's beat. Your hips sway, and you throw back your hair before dipping low and sensually rising once more, your butt enticingly lifting.

"Boss," she turns around to face Fernando, who gestures toward her lips. She licks them, welcoming the familiar taste of iron. She retrieves a piece of satin cloth from her pocket and delicately wipes her lips clean.

"I'm out for the next hour," she informs him, her gaze fixed on you again.

"Yes, Boss," he responds, and without sparing him another glance, she turns around and makes her way to the club's back room.

#pia: dalia #pia: scene #qna: pia #your wish is my command

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domini-porter · 2 months ago

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🍓🥭🍐! (ooh it's a streetlight)

🍓: I don’t really feel like anything is underrated; that’s not really the vibe of this whole enterprise for me. And I've been really lucky in that a lot of my work has been well-received, which is v gratifying and nice! But in the spirit: I kinda wish my companion stories Honeysweet and Saltbitter were more widely-read, even though they’re certainly not everyone’s cuppa, either thematically or stylistically (vaguely experimental writing about—you know it—trauma and its fallout, written as mirrored pieces). Definitely my most poetic stories, but both antique (originally from 2012/13 on FF dot net) and relatively less accessible than straight prose.

🥭: CRACK (which is basically the fic label for high-concept), then angst and smut are tied (for these two idiots? how could it not be), fluff. I prefer crack/high-concept because you can really do whatever within it; angsty crack, smutty crack, fluffy crack, seriously-treated crack. And since it’s by nature a wild setup it allows for all kinds of extremity and maximalism—when you’re talking about sex pollen or magic dicks or zombies, it’s kind of pointless trying to tone anything else down (even though I do tend to engage with writing crack in a more naturalistic way).

Angst is fine, smut is fine; smut is, for me, more often than not a writing exercise. It’s incredibly technical and challenging (sometimes tedious) to write, not because I lack for imagination, but because it’s almost entirely mechanics, which is up there with the tedium of describing a room. There’s a lot to keep track of from beat to beat, and since I’m under no illusions as to how closely the smut chapters/passages will be read, it’s more like writing stereo instructions—very clear, very detailed, one step to the next. It’s also a good challenge in that there’s a pretty limited vocabulary for doin’ it, so avoiding repetition is another huge element of writing smut that doubles as craft exercise.

Fluff is my least fav not because I don’t value it, but it’s . . . fluffy. It’s meant to be a confection. I’ve done it plenty of times; it’s easy, it’s cute. It’s often an excuse to write humor or comedy, which I find very fun! But it’s difficult to sustain for more than like, a one-shot or a scene without more depth starting to sneak in, at least pour moi. I also don’t love the whole hyper-domesticity angle that a lot of fluff relies on; it’s usually way heteroromantically structured, and I just have zero, or perhaps less than zero, interest in cozy family stories, particularly ones involving babies, which comes up a lot in Rizzles fluff. Just not my bag!

🍐: Oh, so many. Aside from the obvious (canon rizzles), I straight-up refuse to engage with Maura’s mob daughter storyline. It felt cheap and melodramatic at the time, and it feels cheap and melodramatic now. I’m half-convinced they just wanted to take advantage of the similarities between Sasha Alexander and Sharon Lawrence. It’s confusing, underdeveloped, and not something that feels true to anything—maybe it’s in the books, but on the show it just feels like a way to give Maura’s character Something Else To Make Her Interesting, and it just doesn’t, not least of all because the character doesn’t need that, she needs to explore all her other, already-rich backstories and relationships. Her neglectful adoptive parents are compelling enough, and I think narratively more believable and complex (or could be), but that’s also kind of shoved aside. And, per my usual complaint, it’s just unexamined trauma on top of unexamined trauma (like, yes they spend a lot of time on it, but it never feels integral to her—the stuff with Paddy, etc, has its arcs and stuff, but . . . who cares?). Anyway, I hate it!

(love youuuuuuuu tho)

JUSTICE FOR MAURA ISLES

#rizzles #fanfic talk #release-the-sheep #justice for maura isles

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aita-blorbos · 1 year ago

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AITA FOR NOT TALKING ABOUT MY PAST?

TIME DOES NOT FLOW CORRECTLY HERE, SO MY TIMELINE MAY SOUND OFF. I (UNCLEAR, CLOCKWORK AUTOMATON (THEY/THEM OR I WILL OBLITERATE YOU)) AND MY "COMPANIONS" (AGES VARY FROM ~8-~70S, 9MS AND 7FS) (THEY RESENT THE TERM MINIONS) HAVE BEEN STUCK IN THIS DISGUSTING DIMENSION FOR AN INDETERMINATE AMOUNT OF TIME. SOMEWHERE BETWEEN A FEW YEARS AND A FEW MONTHS AGO, A PIECE OF THE MOON FELL INTO THE OCEAN.

THE OCEAN IS HORRIBLE AND AWFUL (I AM NOT WATERPROOF), BUT THE MOON IS INORGANIC AND GOOD, SO I THOUGHT THAT THIS WAS A VERY GOOD DEVELOPMENT. FOR A WHILE, IT WAS; THERE WAS A DISAPPOINTING AMOUNT OF ORGANIC LIFE ON THE ISLAND IT FORMED, BUT IT WAS STILL THE MOON, AND SO IT WAS EVEN STILL WORTH THE HORRIBLE JOURNEY ON THE HORRIBLE BOATS WE HAVE BEEN ABLE TO MAKE. HOWEVER, IT SEEMS LIKE THE MOON IS AWARE OF US, AND IT DID NOT ENJOY OUR PRESENCE.

FOLLOWING SOME QUESTIONABLE DECISIONS ON SOME OF OUR PARTS, A MASSIVE LUNAR STORM STARTED TO SWEEP OVER THE WORLD. THIS WOULD BE ANNOYING BUT ULTIMATELY RELATIVELY FINE ON ITS OWN, BUT THE PROBLEMS STARTED WHEN WE FOUND A MAN (~70S?) WHO I WILL CALL RW. HE SEEMED LIKE A PROJECTION INSTEAD OF ACTUALLY BEING PRESENT, AND HE DEMANDED OUR HELP TO RETRIEVE HIS TOOLS. IT TURNS OUT THAT HIS PLAN WAS TO STEAL THE MOON POWER FOR HIMSELF, BUT I WILL TEMPORARILY IGNORE THAT WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE TO CONTINUE TO MORE RELEVANT TOPICS.

AT THE TIME, MY MEMORY BANKS WERE PARTIALLY INACCESSIBLE, WHICH WAS A FACT I ONLY LEARNED WHEN ONE OF MY COMPANIONS WAS REPAIRING MY CHASSIS AFTER WE WERE ATTACKED. SHE CONNECTED WIRES THAT WERE VERY PURPOSEFULLY DISCONNECTED, WHICH RESULTED IN DATA PATHWAYS THAT WERE PREVIOUSLY DISABLED UNFORTUNATELY BEING ABLE TO BE RECALLED. AS A RESULT OF THIS, I RECALLED MY PREVIOUS CONNECTION WITH RW.

BACK IN THE REGULAR WORLD, I WAS WORKING ON A PROJECT FOR AN AUTOMATON WITH RW. I WILL NOT GO INTO THE DETAILS, AS THEY ARE THE LEAST ENJOYABLE ASPECTS ABOUT MY EXISTENCE, BUT SUFFICE TO SAY THAT I WAS NOT ALWAYS THE WAY THAT I AM. THIS WAS DISTRESSING, AND EVEN ONCE I WAS ABLE TO TRANSFER MY CONSCIOUSNESS TO MY PROPER FORM, PAINFUL MOMENTS WHERE I BELIEVED I STILL HAD A DISGUSTING ORGANIC BODY WERE NOT UNCOMMON. AN IMPORTANT FACTOR OF THE PROJECT WAS AN EMPATHY MODULE; HOWEVER, IT WAS UNNECESSARY, AND AS IT TURNS OUT, THE CAUSE OF MY PROBLEMS. RW DEEMED MY ACTIONS "ERRATIC" DURING THIS PERIOD, WHICH ULTIMATELY RESULTED IN HIM DESTROYING OUR RESEARCH AND PREVIOUS PROTOTYPES OF MY BODY IN A FIRE. SOON AFTER THAT, HE ADDITIONALLY PUSHED ME INTO THE CURRENT DIMENSION I AM STUCK IN, PRESUMABLY THROUGH A PORTAL THAT HE WAS WORKING ON AT THE TIME YET I WAS NOT A COLLABORATOR ON.

THE WIRES MY COMPANION RECONNECTED WERE THE WIRES TO MY EMPATHY MODULE, WHICH I HAD LONG SINCE SEPARATED. AS SOON AS I REALIZED THIS, I TORE THE DISGUSTING MODULE OUT AND CRUSHED IT. THE ORGANICS SURROUNDING ME SEEMED SHOCKED, BUT I DID NOT EXPLAIN MYSELF. MY REVOLTING MEMORIES ARE PRIVATE DATA, AND I REFUSE TO THINK ABOUT HOW I WAS NOT ALWAYS THE PERFECT MACHINE THAT I AM NOW, MUCH LESS DISCUSS IT WITH FLESHLINGS.

THE SECOND I SAW RW, I KNEW I HATED HIM, EVEN MORE THAN I ALREADY HATE ORGANIC LIFE. NOW THAT I KNOW WHY I DESPISE HIM, SOME OF THE FLESHLINGS HAVE BEEN PESTERING ME. THEY SEEM MORE FOCUSED ON MY EMPATHY MODULE AT THE MOMENT, BUT THAT HAS EXTENDED TO QUESTIONS ABOUT MY PAST. "WHY DID YOU CRUSH WHAT LOOKS LIKE A MECHANICAL HEART." "WHY DID YOU HAVE A MECHANICAL HEART." "WHERE DID YOU GET A MECHANICAL HEART." ETC. I ACT AS IF MY PROCESSORS DID NOT PICK UP WHAT THEY WERE SAYING WHENEVER I AM ASKED QUESTIONS LIKE THESE (AS IF THEY COULD FAIL IN SUCH A SIMPLE WAY), BUT THE QUESTIONS HAVE NOT LET UP. THEY SAY THEY ARE "WORRIED," BUT THAT IS NOT AN EMOTION THAT I CARE ABOUT. I DO NOT THINK I AM IN THE WRONG FOR THIS.

#aita #am i the asshole #unreality #caps lock

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leporellian · 1 year ago

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i do think that the barber of seville- the opera, or at least rossini's take- does a better version of introducing figaro than the barber of seville (the play) does. and exactly why the opera introduction works while the play introduction doesn't is because of the audience's placement relative to figaro himself.

beaumarchais makes the audience way too comfortable with the character. for one thing, figaro's entrance is casual. he comes in tweaking a song he's been writing- this is a figaro vulnerable enough with the audience to immediately show us something unfinished, which is an immediate breach.

then, once he and the count cross each other's paths (in an almost startlingly mean exchange where the count immediately insults figaro to his face and tells him he's gotten too fat to recognize- beaumarchais's script has a certain meanness that works in some ways and doesn't in others), figaro goes into a VERY long recount of his past adventures, which is too long to screenshot properly so just take my word for it.

this is all entertaining, and some details are interesting, such as figaro's ambition to become a playwright. but it's probably only interesting to those who come back to read it after having seen the figaro operas, because there's no way an audience would be willing to sit through all this exposition. and it also immediately soils any sort of mystique figaro has. figaro is a nuanced character but he is still a trickster, and one of the most captivating parts of tricksters is how enigmatic they actually are.

but the opera has a fantastic solution to all of this. you're no longer figaro's friends whom he is telling everything to; as for all of figaro's insight he is also cynical enough to lack genuine friends. you're his customers.

there's a reason this aria is one of the most famous moments in operatic history. besides the fact that it does slap, it is the most perfect introduction to this character and this world. figaro treats the audience as he does everyone else. he's selling you on himself. there's multiple strokes of genius here- for one thing, figaro tells you all this directly, and there's no way to tell whether or not he's being genuine. the music and libretto even toy with this by purposely shooting for exaggeration. already, his somewhat unscrupulous character is defined without ever even being stated directly- and yet, god damn he's putting up one hell of a sales pitch. at every opportunity he remains curiously distanced from his audience. this figaro would never show the audience an unfinished song lyric, heaven forbid! this figaro is a showman. and in that showmanship another detail is completely overlooked: it is stated in the plays that figaro only takes up the barber job when he realizes he can't make money as a playwright. given there's no mention of anyone else there, figaro is telling all of this to himself. he's ultimately selling himself on himself- perhaps one of his most gaping insecurities of all and it's laid out in a way where the audience doesn't even notice. god damn. it's a work of art.

and that's one of the biggest keys to this character. his weaknesses. must be laid out exactly where the audience can deduce them, but they cannot be directly stated and figaro cannot allow himself to get close enough to the audience for them to clock him immediately. just as a strange detachment marks him from the other characters, it has to mark him from the audience.

there's a common complaint that figaro in the marriage of figaro (mozart's opera) appears less competent than his barber of seville self; but this isn't actually a character inconsistency: the figaro we see in marriage is more intimate with the audience, even if he appears uncomfortable about it. the figaro in marriage allows us to see his mistakes, although he doesn't do so willingly. and remember that while mozart's marriage was written after barber it was still written as a companion piece to an earlier barber of seville opera: by this point, we know figaro, although we still do not entirely understand him. (this effect would have probably been heightened had daponte been allowed to keep more of figaro's original last-act speech from the play instead of being forced by the censors to discard it; for that speech is the exact moment where figaro drops every pretense and finally makes himself palpable to the audience. after that point we do not see figaro expose himself in such a way again until one of his very last lines in the original play, when bartolo tells him that he will surely make friends with his new fortune: "-do you think so?")

this is also another sort of dock point for a lot of the operas masquerading around as the 'third' figaro opera. he's an admittedly tough nut to crack, so either he resumes his position as the vulnerable trickster in marriage without any of the corresponding emotional drive in order to suggest the detachment of his character without going the mile and committing to it, or he's reduced to a prop, or he's actively torn to pieces in what appears to be little more than the composer and librettist having their 'mid-2010s DC superhero movie' moment. marriage basically laying the character as bare as he gets certainly makes it a difficult task but it isn't impossible- or at least as impossible as opera-making teams seem to think it is.

#wahoo some figaro analysis. now back to rigolettoposting.#the barber of seville #the marriage of figaro #figaro #opera tag #rambles

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fallout4-reacts · 2 years ago

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how would companions react to sole who still sees feral ghouls as human, giving them names, knitting them hats, etc, and somehow managing to just casually 'hang out' with them?

Phew, I ended up having time to take care of it. I’m sorry about the delay, but I had a lot of stuff to deal with IRL so uh… I hope you’ll like it

I admit that I put the reactions (accept it or not) at random, knowing that in the game, the acceptance of the bullshit that Sole can do depends entirely on the level of affinity (except when we talk about atrocities in some cases, and still…)

Note : Aaaaaaaah I just realise it was Lucy who was killed by ghouls, Deacon's wife was by his former gang.... .... how could I'll be so out of track... sorry

But to be honest I'm actually working on a hard ask and I will not change anything

Maybe later if really it's bother someone

Cait : She sees a swarm of ghouls approaching Sole and knows exactly what to do. She grabs her baseball bat with both hands and swings as hard as she can at the first skull that comes her way. The person who hauled her out of the cage starts screaming hysterically.

"No way, Cait! Don't harm Ralf! He's only bringing me some ammunition because he saw a deathclaw nearby and wants to protect me."

Bat halfway through the air, Cait glances at Sole like they're some kind of alien.

"You're right now fucking with me. This ghoul is chomping on your arm."

"At all! It's his way of saying hello! If you want, a swap."

"However, he trades a piece of your flesh for a purulent scar."

"Aaaah. It's because I'm mistaken. It's Edith, not Ralf. She's having difficulties holding back, you know?"

"What about those?"

"They also have a hard time holding back."

"I'm not the brightest person on the circuit, but I recognise a feral attack when I see one. They'll bleed you to death."

"No, they just like small bites."

Cait tosses her bat to the ground and walks away.

"I don't even want to be a part of it. Tommy is better than any Fred or Edith."

"Ralf-ouch!"

Codsworth : "Uh, madam/sir, I'm not sure that's such a good idea."

"Come on, Codsworth, Mr. Trellaway, adoooooore your tea. Please do more."

"But what will Mr. Preston say when he finds, uh... Mr. Trellaway in the living room?"

The poor robot is at a loss for words. Indeed, the ghoule does not appear very hostile; he is busy gnawing on the leather strap that Sole gave him to chew on, but the companions have undoubtedly warned him of the dangers of a ghoul going feral. He can't help but think his master/mistress is a little... naive in their approach to the predator.

"Preston may chomp while discovering our guest, but I promised him your famous tea, and he will have it!"

Codsworth, a little frightened, lights the kettle on fire. He hears a stifled pain scream in the brief moment when at least one of his three sensors is not on Sole.

"Mr. Trellaway, please! That is beneath you!"

The poor robot then worries if the radiation did not eventually overcome his master/mistress' intelligence.

Curie : Curie can't help but be astonished. She can't fight with Sole on this one any longer. Still, it was a dangerous decision. She follows Sole and their new companion to the Red Rocket.

"Farkesh"

"I'll be honest with you, Farkesh; I still haven't figured out what Strong means by this stuff, but if it rings any bells," Sole shrugs their shoulders as if it were a minor detail. The ghoul next to them appears irritated.

"Farkesh!"

"There's no doubt about that, Farkesh. Oh! Look! Other friends! Are we going to greet them?"

Curie suppresses a shiver of horror as she witnesses the base being overrun by super-mutants.

"S-s-s-Sole, I don't think you should make more than one friend at a time; that's disrespectful to Farkesh!"

Sole appears to stop and think, then shrugs again.

"You are correct. Anyway, I can't wait to show this one to Strong! He'll be less lonely."

As they walk away, the poor synthetic sighs with relief. She truly wonders how Sole has survived so long in such a state of denial, but every day suffices is irradiated.

Danse (Post-BB) : "This is regarded as insubordination!"

"This is an act of inhumanity on your part!"

"It is precisely humanity's duty to put an end to their suffering!"

"Who says they are suffering?"

"These are creatures with tortured brains!"

"So they're not that different from you!"

Danse's eyes widen in surprise at the insult... That's a touch too close to the mark. He scowls again, taking off the whisky bottle (now empty on the ground) that Sole had given them.

"And they're not attacking you?"

"What would make them attack me? They attack to defend themselves against fools like you who forget they're people."

The blow is delivered once more with force. Danse has to recognise that, for his part, he is not human. He groans as he lowers its head.

"You just squandered a decent bottle of whisky," he grumbles through his beard.

"They have fun, so nothing is wasted."

Danse sighs and crashes on a trunk near one of the ghouls with particularly unpleasant breath.

"This one should brush his teeth more often."

Deacon : "WOH!"

What else is there to say? Deacon enters the barracks and finds Sole engaged in a conversation with three ghouls (who are snarling) over a pair of needles and balls of yarn. To say he was not anticipating it would be an understatement.

"What?!"

"No, no, no!" says Sole.

One of the clawed hands is slapped by Sole.

"It has a loop on it and one on the bottom. Not..." They scrape the previously completed work in a motion reminiscent of the hideous creature. "Do you want to wear this hat or not?"

"Grmgkmomrf"

"I...this is a bad time?" Deacon then inquires, having recovered from his surprise.

"Not at all," his pal responds, smiling. "Would you like to learn to knit as well?"

The Railway agent shifts his gaze from one ghoul to the next, attempting to overlook the numerous scratches and bites on Sole's arms and face.

"I'll pass; I'm already an excellent knitter. Did I ever tell you about the occasion when I knitted an illusory brick wall to protect Glory and me from Courser's troops? I crocheted so quickly and so forcefully that the wall became permanent."

Sole is overjoyed. Knowing how Barbara died, they had honestly assumed that Deacon would be the one of their companions who would reject their vision of their irradiated friends the most, but he appears to have underestimated him. In reality, Deacon is not so bitter. He blames himself for failing to defend Barbara, but Sole who can befriend a ghouli? There will be plenty of stories to tell at HQ.

Dogmeat : Cocking his head to the side, Dogmeat looks at his new companion with interest, but as he comes to sniff him, the being that act like a human but has a peculiar demeanor growls like an animal. Dogmeat retreating and whine.

"Come on, my good boy," his master encourages. "Jerome has a dog allergy, but he will not harm you."

When his owner reprimands him, Dogmeat goes even further, his tail between his legs. He prefers not to offend his beloved master, but if the new human-strange continues to bite his master, Dogmeat will show him who has the biggest fangs.

Elder Maxson : Shoot on the spot. Every time Maxson kills one of their new pals, Sole moans for days about it, but Maxson doesn't give a damn about their complaints.

"The guidelines are very clear, and the abominations must be carried out."

"You decide how things work!"

"I sometimes doubt your common sense."

"If you can't respect my guests, then you should stay on your ship!"

"These-are-abominations!"

"Have you taken a look at yourself in the mirror lately?"

"DISMISS!"

If sole insists, they will end up at the Cambridge Prison.

Hancock : When it's his turn, he snatches the bottle of whisky from the other ghouls. There is not even a drop remaining. These other ghouls are completely devoid of common sense. Handock groans and then draws an inhaler of Jet.

"So, Freddy, how did Sole meet you?"

In his efforts to get the most out of this wild evening, he pays no attention to the quarrel that is going on between Danse and Sole. When Danse is compelled to lie down among them after being defeated, Sole brings out a fresh bottle of their renowned whisky, and Hancock makes it a point to be the first one to get his hands on it.

Gage : Take aim and fire. As Sole crashes on him, they grabs his arm to prevent another shoot.

“MARLEY! HOW DARE YOU!”

“What? Boss? You may have taken in too much of this gas, I fear.

"When Oswald took a short break, I supervised Marley. How am I going to explain that?”

"It was a ghoul!"

"He was my friend!"

For a while, Porter observes the motionless walking corpse with extreme caution.

"I strongly disapprove of this...distraction."

"So, you want me to secure the park, okay, but how was Marley threatening you?"

"That thing looks like a feral ghoul!"

"He didn't harm you at all! He was not as dangerous as Nisha!

Even as Porter tries to deny it, he has to admit that they're probably right, but he can't just abandon the ghoul-infested section of the park, right?

"This park is mine! I’m the Overboss and I do what I want!”

"And who nominated you?"

"The one who just robbed me of the most incredible mutfruit pie recipe in the Commonwealth by murdering the chef who created it."

"I'll show you what you should do with a mutfruit."

But Porter doesn't get the chance for a while, because Sole mopes around for weeks after the "murder" and doesn't want to talk to him. Sole no longer causes problems inside Nuka-World after Oswald and his companions decide to leave the park, although Porter also chooses to skip over the occasional story Shank gives him about wild nights in some Commonwealth bauge.

MacCready : No. No, seriously. MacCready comes at the boathouse, finds the three ghouls relaxing happily with Sole around a chess game (which appears to be a real piece toss), then turns his back on the scene and leaves. With this new employment, he's seen green ones and ripe ones, but truly, companion of feral ghouls? And how will he acquire his son's meds if...wait a minute. He opens the door and peers into the place.

"Can you be friends with any ghoule?"

"First and foremost, Mac, they are human beings."

"We can talk about it later, but... hm... are you interested in doing something for me?"

Nick Valentine : "Be careful," he provides Sole as they pass into the Fens. "There are a lot of wild ghouls around."

"Are you referring to Jerry and his gang? They enjoy a good laugh now and then, but their jokes are never too serious."

"Please excuse me?"

Valentine turns to Sole, as he is unsure whether or not his hearing sensor picked up the correct information.

"Miska, Jerry, Samuel, and Prince. They're on the next street over. They occasionally take an arm or two or a few arrogant stiffs, but it's nothing to worry about. They're merely pranksters."

Nick rubs his chin, pondering the new one. He'd seen his fair share of fools in the corner, but this one appears to be an outlier.

"You know what a feral is?"

"A human whose brain radiation makes oral communication very difficult."

"It's... a way of putting things. However, it's not only spoken communication that is challenging."

"Yes, I know, they have bad coordination, but have you ever seen Paul Pembrooke after a night of partying at the Dugout?"

“Currently…yes.”

"Same shit."

"Let me, haha...understand. For you, a feral is a human who is horrible cook?"

“Isn’t that it?”

Nick sighs and shrugs his shoulders. This poor vaultie will have plenty of time to realise their error. In the meantime, he can't wait to get to his office in Diamond City and forget about Malone altogether.

Piper : "Hehe, Charlie! Yes! Yes, fantastic!"

Piper takes a hesitant step back towards the door, determined to leave the house without losing a single piece. Sole looks up at her, happily smiling.

"He does, and he enjoys your articles! He's also a talented poet; do you want to see his latest work?"

While the monster quietly chews a baseball, the journalist swallows slowly, her gaze fixed on the ghoul.

"You know what? You'll deliver all of this to me at the Puclick Occurrency. I'll gladly read them, and I'll even offer you some old newspapers to give to your friend. But I...really need to get going. I have... a friend on fire, and, oh..."

"A friend on fire? Piper, you're so funny."

"Yes, eheh," Piper chuckles. "I am a true clown. It's all me! Anyway, bye!"

She rushes out of there without looking back, only to run into a frightened Preston in the street.

"Hey, Garvey!"

"Piper."

"Did you... come to see Sole?"

"I...think she already has a...guest."

"Eh, indeed."

"Truly, truly..."

Piper approaches, peering over her shoulder.

"Do you think... something burned on the balcony?"

The Minutemen sigh deeply, letting go of the mask.

"I think the entire attic turned to dust."

Preston : "General, I've heard of..."

When he sees Sole seated on their couch, sharing a plate of Fancy Lads Snack Cake over a cup of tea with... a ghoule whose pieces aren't even in position to savour the taste of the miniature cookies, his voice dies on his lips. The colonel's sight passes Codsworth's visual sensor, who raises his appendages and brings two cups of tea into the living room.

"General?"

"Ah! Preston! Come on in! Come see Mr. Trellaway! I told him about some of our exploits, and he enjoyed them. I'm sure he'll be overjoyed if he hears from you."

The unfortunate man finds himself taking a step back.

"General, it's a feral!"

"Rah, insults and racism right away. Preston, you've surprised me. I'm a little disappointed. Get this poor Preston a cup of tea, Codsworth. We'll return some sanity to his mind."

Preston takes another step back, wondering whether it's Sole who needs to regain control of their own mind.

"I... no thanks. I'm going on my tour. But, uh... General, when your... visitor departs, please come and see me. A settlement requires assistance."

"But please sit down and tell me all about it!"

"No, don't be insistent. It's... Sturges calling!"

The colonel sprints outdoors, his heart racing. For the thousandth time in a month, he wonders what he was thinking when he was made Sole General.

Strong : "Puny human stupid."

"Strong!"

"Stupid rotten human. Puny human stupid. Strong goes"

"Strong, attentions!"

"Puny human want Strong hit them?"

"No… But hold on. You're disrespecting my guests."

The super-mutant growls at the few feral ghouls gathered around the fire before turning his heels. He will have to seek out the milk of human kindness on his own. A human who becomes friends with ferals will never be able to get close to it.

X6-88 : Shoot on sight. The Courser, although Sole arguing for hours, does not bend, respond, or comment. When Sole encounters another wild pack, X6 eliminates them all until Sole finishes saluting them. When Sole became enraged, X6 seized their arms and transferred them to the Institute.

"Father, your... parent has a difficult time differentiating between humans and dangerous entities. Before returning them to the surface, I strongly suggest that you submit them to a battery of medical exams."

Sole fights, debates, and tries everything, but after explanations, Shaun agrees with X6. They put them through so many tests that Sole has more time to think things through than he needs to. When they eventually get their leave, they swear not to hang out with X6 when they travel to see their buddies.

#fallout 4 companions #fallout 4 react #fallout 4 reactions #fo4 #fallout 4 #cait #curie #codsworth #danse #dogmeat #hancock #nick valentine #elder maxson #maccready #deacon #x6 88 #fallout

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