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wooahaes · 1 year

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hi hello here to talk abt the masterpiece that is uts ☀️

are there any deleted scenes that you could tell us about? or scrapped plots/scenarios?

hi hiii skdfhsdf savv calling it a masterpiece... i owe u my life...

anyway uts spoilers technically

yep!! i have scraps leftover from mingyu's part where i wasn't sure what i wanted to do regarding his injury. i had one idea where mingyu would have pushed reader out of the way of a falling, cracked glass jar and ended up with it shattering as it hit his hand. it'd be incredibly messy and painful and i dont really remember why i chose the burn over this? i think i just picked the one i wanted to write more. there was a slight vague part of said 'how gyu get hurt?' process where i considered something like him fucking up his leg while pushing reader out of the way.

actually now that i think about it, i think i chose the burn because it wouldn't have been so 'mingyu saving reader.' i didnt like the idea of reader having to deal with the guilt of being the reason mingyu got hurt and i felt it'd be cuter to just have reader decide to take care of him because they truly cared for him--not out of this sense of obligation.

uhhh the original original ending of cheol uts would have p much outright stated that he and reader had sex (i think i implied it in a few endings but left it entirely up to readers choice on whether they did or not--it was left very very vague). i scrapped the idea entirely because i felt like the emotions in the scene were too high and that they didn't need to take that step, and then later i scrapped the scene entirely (and shared it here) because i wanted reader to be the one who confessed to cheol. like idk i just Really liked the idea of reader taking initiative to confess to cheol and do something special (+ i really like the sentiment i wrote into it where cheol found everyone, but reader found cheol). plus idk my blog is almost entirely sfw (save for that one hosh fic i wrote where its outright stated he and reader bang + i think some sexual implications in my own bday fics that i wrote For Me lol) so it felt weird to end cheol's part of a series by outright saying "yes they sex" esp since im p sure i have some readers who are ace and i didnt wanna alienate 'em if they don't want sex at all

plus also something something reader was still recovering from being sick so i felt like cheol would be Very vigilant about not pushing reader too hard & making sure they were taking care of themself. banished to cuddle in his arms for one million years until he knows ur better >:(

in said og og ending there was a mention of there being a mix of bliss and regret because it felt like reader and cheol had rushed into this kind of relationship when like... he felt like reader deserved something softer. sweeter. to take them on dates and sneak kisses when the others weren't looking. but that he'd ultimately feel relieved in being there next to reader. maybe ill release it at some point haha

i DID however take the part where cheol breaks down crying in the ending of his part from it (the whole 'it's not beautiful to watch a person crumble' thing) as well as the following bits. the line w the 'love itself was an uncertain beast' and cheol admitting that he thought he needed to hide his feelings because hes supposed to be strong and reader makes him weak.

technically i scrapped the idea of doing moodboards to introduce everyone. i was going to do a lil moodboard + have a litle blurb with their alternate name & a little about each. i think that was before i wrote the 'before.' chapter that pretty much said everything + i only finished seokmin's before i changed gears.

i thiiiink i considered 'fawn' as the nickname for reader in the very beginning? but joshua was supposed to be the deer of the group so.

aside from thaaaaat.... im not sure? i think i followed most of my fic plans for UtS pretty closely.

OH OH i can talk about maybe scrapped poly au endings since i know how im ending it now haha

so the original poly au was gonna go fully delulu tbh? one by one they would have all disappeared until it was just reader and cheol, ultimately 'facing the sun' and accepting the memories that have returned to them (and the fact it meant they would disappear from this world). it would have branched off into two endings i think? one where reader refuses to let go, and both reader and cheol agree to just... stay there forever. together.

and then reader would have woken up the next day in a field with a blindfold over their eyes. they take it off to see a pretty man with brown eyes. who is he? and... for that matter, who are you?

and if they chose to let go, accepting that they might never see cheol (or any of the others again) bc as much as they need them, the world needs them more, reader would have woken up in their apartment, annoyed at how long they felt they'd slept. they find a little mouse plushie they don't remember buying, and they can't really remember the dream they had--only that they went to bed sobbing and wishing life would be simpler.

weeks pass. reader ends up getting coffee at a place and overhearing one of the guys behind them whispering about how their drink order sounds good and they forget to give their name for the order. the order gets called out, reader goes over to get it, only to run straight into said guy--who recognizs reader instantly with a quiet 'mouse.' and reader turns to realize they've come face-to-face with vernon (and seungkwan, who was with him), bc i liked the idea of it coming full circle to be reader seeing vernon again and immediately recognizing him as everything started to come back.

the three of them ended up going back to someones apartment while calling all of the others over bc "dude its fucking important" and they all reunite, unsure of what will come next, but glad to be together again, even if only for a little while.

aaaaaand the other ending was going to just be a time loop. reader fully confesses their love to the group and then wakes up in the field the next day, remembering nothing.

BOTH OF THOSE ENDINGS FUCKING SUCK THO-- bc they don't fit the idea of what UtS is to me. a huge part of UtS is the acceptance of grief in a sense and moving forward and i kinda hope to dig into that far more with the poly fic once i finish planning it and get around to writing it. although i do like the split idea? honestly if i bring it back... pretend u all never read this.

#wooahaes.ask #tumblr continuously hates saving my tags ig so i have to manually get the pizza emoji.... oh cruel world.... havent i suffered enough... /j #savv 🍕#uts.spoilers

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silversoulstardust · 2 years

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Tag Game To Better Know You! Send this to people you'd like to know better!

tagged by @abitofboth (thank you for the tag mills🥺)

what book are you currently reading?

under the whispering door by by TJ Klune. the book is fine, I like reading TJ Klune’s work but it’s taking me forever to finish because of its heavy subjects. (death and afterlife, and it’s hard for me because of recent losses)

what do you usually wear?

depends on what I’m doing, I guess. currently staying up in bed past midnight so i’m in my comfy jammy and a yellow sweater <3

how tall are you?

5 ft 2. AND OLY @olyollyoxenfree BEFORE YOU COME FOR ME I AM TALL FOR AN ASIAN LMAO

what’s your star sign? do you share a birthday with a celebrity or historical event?

sagittarius. I share birthday with Scarlet Johanson, Mark Ruffalo and Jamie-Lee Curtis!

do you go by your name or a nickname?

I go by Chromie online. it’s a nickname given by someone I talked to on tumblr in the past, and I like it so much it stuck with me even though we part ways not on so good terms. wherever she is I hope she’s doing fine <3

did you grow up to become what you wanted to be as a child?

yeah but I kinda wish I didn’t, honestly. working in healthcare is taxing both mentally and physically, and I have assholes for colleagues. (tho I think that’s applicable everywhere.)

what’s something you’re good at vs something you’re bad at?

good at: showing up and being there for people I care about

bad at: asking for help

if you draw/write, or create in any way, what's your favorite picture/favorite line/favorite etc. from something you created this year?

This is from my Steddie time travel fix it AU, and I don’t know why but I really loved it.

Steve never really had anyone to split chores with before. His parents are almost never home. Robin does stay over from time to time, but she prefers ordering pizza, it’s her comfort food that’s almost always denied when she’s home, so she takes the chance to order it whenever she’s sleeping over at Steve’s place. Steve never thought having someone do the dishes for him as romantic, but here he is, staring at this metalhead in his kitchen, with glorious long hair and tattoos all over his skin wearing all black ensemble, wiping a spatula using dry cloth over the sink, occasionally smiling at Steve, a domestic bliss in the unlikeliest of time. Eddie caught him staring and when he asks why, there’s just a jumbled up emotions inside Steve that he can’t possibly put into words. So instead he turns the stove off and makes out with Eddie against the counter, thinking that this, this is what he’s been missing his entire life.

dogs or cats?

a cat person through and through. cant live with them, cant live without them, y’know?

what's something you would like to create content for?

thinking of writing some ronance fics in the future! maybe loid/yor tooth rotting fluff and some nanami kento/haibara yu content because those two deserve better than their fate in the manga

what’s something you’re currently obsessed with?

if you’ve been on my tumblr for the last six months, you’d notice I have been entirely consumed by steddie brainrot and stranger things lol

what's something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year?

Dr Strange: multiverse of madness. wandavision series was so spectacular and I was giddy for it until months later they revealed that the writer was mike waldron. the bar of my expectation was so low it was basically on the floor and yet I was still disappointed

what’s a hidden talent of yours?

I can write with both hands. does that count??

what's something you wish to have at this moment?

a long hug and a shoulder to cry on would be nice. cant exactly cry on cue but I think if someone hold me long enough I might start crying lol

tagging @mygeekcorner @olyollyoxenfree @harrringtons @steviesmunson @froof-of-the-loof @princessstevemunson @cursedfoxteeth @iprefertheterminsane @gundamthey17 <3

#ask game #chrmz.txt #get to know chromie

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ibijau · 4 years

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Second to last instalment of the Bad Timeline, and seeing how original timeline LXC deals with this :D

BIG WARNING for suicide, blood, major angst, and implied violence against animals.

The first few days of hiding in Cloud Recesses had been the worst ones.

Xichen had been consumed with rage and grief and sheer betrayal over what had happened. He had known that Jin Guangyao was not all that he seemed, events had opened his eyes to that long before Wangji and Wei Wuxian barged in with the mangled body of his first love. But he had never imagined that his friend, his sworn brother, the man he'd trusted above any other, would have fallen so low.

Huaisang’s own betrayal had been rubbing salt into the wound.

Of course, being manipulated into stabbing Jin Guangyao had been a shock… and there could be no doubts about that manipulation, not once Xichen had had some space to think about it. He knew what his husband was like when he lied.

And yet, he could have forgiven this.

He could not forgive that Huaisang had never said anything about Mingjue’s death. That he had allowed Xichen to remain friends with the man who had so cruelly murdered the man he loved. That he had never trusted Xichen after all, no matter how much Xichen had tried to convince himself otherwise. Or had Huaisang thought that his husband had been an accomplice in his brother’s death? Xichen had pushed so much for Jin Guangyao to play Cleansing to Mingjue, he’d wanted so badly for his best friend and his lover to get along again. Huaisang would have been excused for suspecting Xichen.

But then, it meant everything between them had been fake. It meant Xichen had never become as good at reading through his husband’s acting as he had believed. All that affection and tenderness, those moments of happiness, the way Huaisang melted at the first sign of gentleness… could he really have pretended about that? And if so, what did it say about Xichen that he had taken all of it at face value, so desperate for closeness that he’d fallen for those lies?

By the end of his first month in seclusion, most of Xichen’s anger had calmed.

It was replaced by guilt.

He had failed Mingjue by trying to force that friendship with Jin Guangyao, by refusing to see the warning signs. Mingjue had told him that Jin Guangyao was dangerous, but he hadn’t listened, hadn’t wanted to judge too harshly someone who was so hardworking, who had risen in spite of difficult origins.

Maybe he had failed Jin Guangyao as well, by not seeing how life in Lanling Jin was changing him. In spite of all evidence, Xichen still believed that his sworn brother had been a good person once. Perhaps all this tragedy could have been avoided in Xichen had just known how to offer help the right way. Jin Guangyao too had suffered from his efforts to maintain the friendship between him and Mingjue. Who knew if he would have turned to murder if they had just been allowed to drift away from each other.

Above all, Xichen feared he had failed Huaisang. They were married. They were cultivation partners. They were friends even, or so he had thought. And yet, Huaisang had never come to him with what he had found out about Jin Guangyao. He had preferred to take revenge alone rather than to share anything with his own husband.

How to blame him, when Xichen had failed to protect those he loved before.

Somewhere near the end of the second month of seclusion, Wangji came home, Wei Wuxian trailing behind him.

Xichen, at first, refused to see him, just as he refused to see anyone. Guilt was harder to wrangle than anger, it ran deeper, it was more insidious.

But when Wangji insisted and returned several days in a row, Xichen gave in. His brother was not one to come knocking on his door without good reason.

Wangji was the same as ever. He sounded worried when he inquired after Xichen’s health, but when his concerns were dismissed, he simply went straight to the reason for his visit.

"I discussed your marriage with uncle,” he explained. “Gusu Lan can afford to repay your dowry, should you wish it."

Xichen stared at his brother, trying to make sense of what was offered. Then, at last, it hit him.

He could divorce Huaisang.

He would never have to see him again. After everything that had happened, it should have felt like a gift, a blessing from the heavens. A kindness to both of them, when their marriage had turned out such a failure.

Instead the thought was more painful than the betrayal had ever been.

Huaisang was a liar, a manipulator, a murderer, a monster whose crimes were no lesser than Jin Guangyao’s.

But he was also Xichen's husband. He was a man who had opened up to Xichen over the years, letting him see parts of him that no one must have seen since his brother's death. They had laughed together, run their sect together, been happy together. Xichen refused to believe it had all been faked. Nobody could have been acting so perfectly, so consistently. Something had been real

And whatever his crimes, at least Nie Huaisang had never committed them for personal gain, but only to avenge a brother he adored. The means had been questionable, but the intentions were honourable.

Besides, even though he had never known how far they ran, Xichen had long known there were deep shadows within the man he loved.

And he still loved Huaisang.

That thought shocked him, just as he had been shocked when he had first realised he felt that way.

Even after everything, he still loved that odd little man he was married to.

Even after everything, he did not want to lose him.

Xichen looked at his brother, and smiled in the polite, controlled way he had learned to do in unpleasant situations.

“I am very grateful that you would offer this,” he told Wangji. “But that will not be necessary. I need time alone at the moment, but unless he asks for it, I have no intention of separating from my husband.”

“Hm. He hasn’t asked.”

That lifted a weight from Xichen’s shoulders, freeing him from a tension he had not realised he was holding. After everything that had been revealed, Huaisang could easily have asked for a divorce as well. Nobody in the cultivation world would have blamed him for rejecting a husband who had been so close to his brother’s murderer. If Huaisang hadn’t asked for it, there might still be hope.

Xichen knew some of their relationship had to have been genuine.

Feeling a little lighter, his smile turned more sincere.

“I hear you’re married as well now?” he asked his brother. “Eloping, at your age… that’s not very serious, Wangji.”

Wangji smiled, unapologetic. He looked happier than his brother had ever seen him, and Xichen felt another weight leave his body. Even if Huaisang and him did not manage to reconcile, some good would have come from this disaster.

A little after the four months mark, Xichen felt ready to face the world once more. The guilt had not fully eased out, and the anger still returned sometimes, but he was growing too restless to stay in Gusu.

He thanked his uncle and brother for letting him stay this long, for respecting his need for isolation.

Then, at last, he left for Qinghe.

He left for home.

It was oddly pleasant to fly to the gates of the Unclean Realm at sunset and greet the guards. They all seemed very happy to see him again. Xichen realised the opposite was just as true. After ten years there, Qinghe Nie had become his sect, even if something of Gusu Lan stuck to him.

This really was home.

"Our Sect Leader will be glad you're back," one of the men said. "He's been moping around like a lost soul since he returned with…"

The other guard elbowed him sharply in the ribs. Xichen pretended not to notice.

"My husband can be a little dramatic," he agreed, feeling both guilty and pleased that Nie Huaisang might have missed him. "I hope he has not neglected his duties too much, or I'll have to scold him. Do you know where I might find him?"

He expected to be directed to the gardens or the aviary, unless Huaisang had gone for a trip. Xichen would not mind waiting a little.

"He's in his room," the first guard explained, glancing at his comrade who shrugged. "He's been there since early afternoon. He gave orders not to bother him for a few days, even if guests came, but… Master Lan, I don't think that applies to you."

"Yes, go ahead and knock some sense into him," the other agreed. "He's been moody lately, it will be good for him that you're back."

Lan Xichen thanked them for the information, and crossed the gate. It worried him a little that Huaisang would decide to isolate that way. Even though his cultivation had improved over the duration of their marriage, he did not think Huaisang had ever made efforts to practice inedia so far. Hopefully he was not pushing himself too hard.

In spite of the guards’ hints that Huaisang appeared to have missed him, Xichen felt a growing tension seize him as he walked toward his husband’s room. Anxiety, he guessed. He hoped that Huaisang would want to see him again, that the guards were not mistaken, that he had made the right choice in coming home. Even if they could not reconcile, at least they should talk, there was so much they had never told each other. They needed to talk. They would talk. Xichen would not leave Qinghe until things were finally clear between them. He would…

It was only when he arrived at the door of Huaisang’s bedroom that Xichen realised the odd feeling he’d had since stepping inside that building might not have been nerves alone.

He could feel intense resentful energies coming from that room, strong enough to nearly gag him. Whatever was going on was so powerful that it should have been noticed by passing disciples and servants… but nobody ever came near Huaisang’s bedroom without his permission, and if he had specifically requested to be left alone…

Overcome with fear, Lan Xichen hurried to open the door.

The stench of blood hit him immediately. No surprise there. Several animals laid on the ground, some of them still twitching and agonising.

Xichen barely noticed them.

His full attention was on a pale shape on the floor, surrounded by words hastily scribbled in blood.

A naked man, his wrists and throat slashed open.

Xichen shouted as he ran toward Huaisang, falling to his knees in the pool of blood and pulling the body in his arms. It was still somewhat warm, but growing colder with each passing second.

“What have you done?” Xichen cried, holding his husband close. “A-Sang, I was coming home!”

Xichen could feel no heartbeat, not breath, but still tried to regain enough control of himself that he could share his energy with Huaisang in a desperate attempt to save him.

“I was coming home,” he sobbed. “I was coming home.”

The body in his arm did not react.

Xichen cried harder, never letting go, never giving up his attempt to heal his husband.

“I was coming home.”

#xisang #lan xichen #nie huaisang #mo dao zu shi #the untamed #suicide tw #bad timeline #this au really deserves its nickname lol #jau writes #I swear I'm sorry #I swear the next instalment should be a little less bad #but yeah this one's a bad one ahah

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fictionsmooches · 3 years

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Reiner, Poco, and Zeke Office AU head cannon

Reiner

He’s the guy who offers to make copies for you at any given moment.

He was giving th nickname ‘the assisant’ on account of you never having to lift a finger to do anything around the office.

In return you would make him a nice homemade lunch and which he would gush over all the time. “Reiner its not that good” you tease.

Hard worker ™

“(Y/n) go a head and head home, i can finish I your part.” He say. You’d never let him do your work but he insisted on waiting for you to finish so you wouldn’t leave the office alone.

This started after a headline aired about somebody attack while leaving their empty office building, needless to say Reiner couldn’t let that happen to his precious (y/n). So he started taking you to and from work just to ensure your safety.

If you’re having a hard time with another coworker, he’ll offer to talk to them for you, but when you say you can handle it, he’ll back off but keep a close eye on you two.

All the older ladies in the office flirt with him so you often get him out of situations where they’re trying to touch his muscles lol

Porco

It’s a shock that this guy is still employed.

Very much minimum effort. But he laughs at all your bosses jokes and bring donuts on fridays so maybe that has something to do with it.

“Porco stop sending me meme on our work emails” you’d respond to him. He’d shoot you a look from across the room with a ‘you’re no fun’ pout.

Porco likes spending time with you so he always wants to take you out on lunch during your breaks.

“Porco our break is over in 10 minutes, we cant just sit in the parking lot of this restaurant and watch movies on your phone” he’d respond with “I’ll just tell the boss we got a flat tire or a bear attack us or something. He’ll understand”

If you’re having trouble with a coworker, he wont directly call them out on it, but instead try really hard to embarrass them. He’d for sure he like “(insert random coworker name), you sure are looking casual now a days. I thought this was a office”

Always brings the most random dishes to company potlucks.

He also likes stopping by your desk and handing you silly notes with drawing of your coworkers.

Zeke

He’s a effortless over achiever. He doesn’t even have to try, he’s always ahead of the game and first to get promoted.

He buys you coffee or tea (or whatever else you’d like) in the mornings.

Always opens doors and holds elevators for you :”)

He doesn’t get along with anyone in the office but makes it a point to speak with you and just chit chat. He’s not rude or mean, he’s very polite but doesn’t make an effort to make friends in the workplace.

“(Y/n), is that a new shirt? It looks good on you” this man would be an absolute shameless flirt. It doesn’t even matter if he’s doing a good job at it, he just does it to see you smile or blush.

Every now and then he’ll finish your work for you with out asking so you can leave early with him. He’s convinced you to play hookie a few times to take you out on day trips.

Zeke has no problem telling a coworker you’re having problems with to back off of you or he’ll make sure they don’t have a job come Friday.

I feel like Zeke would low key spoil you for no reason. Like gives you expensive office supplies because ‘you deserve it’

#porco x reader #reiner x reader #zeke x reader #snk x reader #aot x reader #zeke yeager #porco galliard #reiner braun #reiner braun x reader #porco galliard x reader #zeke Yeager x reader

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leafsgarbage · 4 years

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A bet- Sakusa Kiyoomi

A/N: This is my first scenario so I am a bit nervous but excited! Obviously its going to be a Sakusa one lol

Warnings: Panic attack

Spoilers! Timeskip!AU

Genre: Angst/Fluff

Pairing: Timeskip!Sakusa x fem!reader

Main Masterlist

pt.2

You had just finished all your classes, and since Omi was still at practice with the Jackals, you decided to go back home and make him a lunch. (He really doesn’t like eating out that much because he can never know for sure how they made it, but he trusts you).

You had been dating for three months now and you were as happy as can be. You were both used to each other by now, Omi even allowed himself to be a bit more open with PDA (a handhold and a kiss on the cheek is all you’ll get, but if he’s sweaty- forget about it). And you easily slipped into his life, like you were meant to. Sakusa appreciated how patient and respectful you were towards him since your first meeting

After a tiring day of exams you just needed some time to yourself with a quick cup of tea to brighten your day. And to take your mind of how bad you think you did.

The cashier takes your order and proceeds to ask you to wait to the side. In the meantime, a group of men make their way to the register and begin to order. You see one of them half a step behind the rest with a mask on and his hands in his pockets. He stands pretty tall, his black-wavy hair covering one of his eyebrows, but you can still perfectly see the two aligned moles on his forehead.

When he looks at you it seems as if he’s staring you down, but you don’t want to assume because of his mask. To be nice you wave at him, to which he nods his head at you. Then, one of the guys he’s with, a blonde one, skips over to the wavy haired man and pulls his hands out of his pockets while holding them. “Omi-Omi, what do you want to order? My treat!”

This time the black-haired man’s eye was twitching, the one you could see at least. Before he can pull his hands away, a smaller orange-haired guy pulls the blonde one back. “Tsumu!” He scolds. “You can’t just hold Omi-san like that, you didn’t even sanitize.” The orange man takes the blonde one to the table that this grey haired guy was saving.

You returned to look at Omi as they called him, and you see him struggling to find something in his pockets. He’s looking a little fidgety and uncomfortable. You remember what the orange-haired guy said and grab the hand-sanitizer in your pocket. Ever since your little sister was born, she always got sick easily, so you carried them in your pocket out of habit.

“Hi, um Mister.” You call to his attention and he stops what he’s doing. You hold out your hand, palms up, holding the hand sanitizer. “Would you like some?”

The man relaxes his shoulders and nods his head. He cups his hands together holding them out and looks at you. “Could you put it on my hands please.” You nod and do as he asks. He rubs his hands together and looks back at you. “Thank you...”

“L/N Y/N.” You tell him. “You are?”

He nods. “Sakusa Kiyoomi.” There’s no need to tell you a nickname, which you understand, you’ll probably never see him again. But he’s so handsome and attractive that you want to talk to him more.

“Do you-”

“Order for Y/N!” The worker calls. You curse in your head and give Sakusa a tight smile.

After you grab your drink you turn back to Sakusa. “It was nice meeting you Sakusa. I usually come here around this time, so if you’re ever around I’ll be here.” You smile at him then leave the shop.

At this point you want to rip your hair out. What the hell was that. I’ll be there.

A week goes by and there is still no sign of Sakusa anywhere. You don’t even blame him for not showing up, but you decide to go back to the store the next day just in case.

Meanwhile at the Jackals’ gym....

“Come on Omi-”

“No.” Sakusa replies.

Atsumu grumbles and stares pointedly at him. “She was super pretty and definitely into you. Why don’t you go to her?” The setter questions. “It’s not nice to leave people waiting.”

Sakusa is beyond annoyed. “I’m not interested.” He tells him. Bokuto and Hinata are quietly watching from the sides, waiting to see if they have to intervene.

However, the Jackals’ setter is determined, and he knows just how to push his spiker’s buttons. “That’s fine Omi, it’s not like you would be able to sustain a relationship with a girl like her.” Sakusa stares at Atsumu, only a little bothered. “I mean we all know that, but if you did date her for two months, I would stop trying to touch you all the time-”

“Deal.” Sakusa tells him. “Anything to get you away from me.”

The next day, you did see Sakusa, and though conversation started a bit rough, once you got him going on volleyball, he was on a roll. It’s not that he expresses how much he loves it or even if he does at all, but he has a lot of great stories that came from volleyball.

The rest is history.

3 months later...

He introduced you to the rest of the Jackal’s by accident, when he forgot his jersey at your house. The boys teased you endlessly and you joked around and got to know them all well. You were close with them, especially Atsumu.

When you show up to the gym with Sakusa’s lunch, everyone lights up as they see you, especially a certain black-haired spiker, albeit’s a small grin. They walk up to you and Sakusa kisses your forehead. “Omi, I brought you lunch just in case you forgot.”

“Thank you Y/N. I will eat well.” He smiles.

Atsumu grunts. “GAHHHHH. Y/N I don’t know how ya deal with his deadpanned faces. You deserve someone who will give ya great praise for yer hard work. Someone like me!”

Bokuto laughs at Atsumu. “Tsum-Tsum, you better quit joking around or else Omi’s gonna serve the ball real hard at you today.”

The setter waves his arm and puts it around you. “I know I told Omi two months, but ya’ve been together three months now, and I’m so glad he decided to keep ya.”

You tense under the setter’s arm and look at your boyfriend who’s jaw is clenched, staring holes into Atsumu’s head. “What?”

“Did Omi-Omi not tell ya? I thought- Y-ya’ve been together for long so I-” For once in his life, Atsumu stops talking completely. Bokuto and Hinata drag him out and go back into the lockers.

You stare at Sakusa, uneven breaths leaving your body. “What was Atsumu talking about?”

He nods at you and clasps his hands together. “Y/N,” he starts just hear all of this out ok.” Your face is stern and he nods. “When we met, I wasn’t going to go see you.” You just felt a pang in your heart, but held yourself steady and listened. “But Atsumu agreed that if I dated you for two months then he wouldn’t try to touch me anymore.” All you do is nod your head, hands clenched at your sides. “I didn’t know I was going to fall in love with you-”

“No.” You tell him. “You have not so much as told me you loved me at all this whole time, and you choose now to tell me?” Sakusa cocks his head to the side. “Were you just going to let me fall for you then dump me after you no longer needed me?”

He shakes his head. “No Y/N, please, I didn’t know I was going to-”

“Don’t say it again.” Your tone is cold, Sakusa has never heard you speak like this to him. “Let me play this back to you, so you can hear what you sound like.” He waits. “You were never really interested in me, but you pretended to be this whole time-”

Sakusa shakes his head vigorously. “No! Y/N it wasn’t, not after-”

You laugh at him, “I didn’t finish.” He decides to stop and listen to you. “You pretended and made me believe you really liked me and you did all these amazing things for me that had me believing you cared.” Your chest is heaving up and down, eyes watering saying this out loud. “And- And all because, you didn’t have any other way to get your teammate to respect your personal space.” Your voice cracked and a couple tears fall, but you quickly wipe at them. “Why would you do something like that? Did I deserve that?”

He doesn’t say anything, because he knows he’ll just make this worse if he does. You’re right. You didn’t deserve that, from getting to know you, he understands that you deserve the world, and he tried- oh god he tried so hard to give that to you. To make up for what he did wrong. He wanted to tell you how this started because he knew if you found out any other way, it would be like this. Hell, it might even be like this if he ended up telling you himself. To even his surprise, he just wanted to hold you, tell you that while this may have started out that way, he loved you more than he ever thought he could. He loved you so much he found himself taking out two mugs in the morning out of habit. There is a cleared out drawer with all your things in it. Your toothbrush is in his bathroom, and he bought you the skin care you have at your own house because he knows how important it is to take care of your skin. On his couch, there is now a soft blanket sitting on the arm rest because you like to snuggle under them. His favorite thing in his apartment is the picture frame you bought him that sits by his bedside of you and him, and it is the only one he owns.

Sakusa wanted to tell you how much he loves you. How much he is ready to scream it out loud so you would understand, but you’re slipping away from him far too fast and he finds himself at a loss of what to do. “I wish-” you start to say but get choked up. “I wish I never met you.” Sakusa is gutted and that what it takes for him to come back too, but it’s too late because you’re gone.

His voice hitches as he tries to say something but he can’t. The boys shuffle back in and his eyes land on his setter. Something breaks inside him, and his composed demeanor goes down the drain as he lunges at Atsumu. However Bokuto is quick to jump in front of Sakusa and hold him at arms length. The D1 6′4 tall player tries pushing aganist the owl man, but Bokuto holds on, their strength almost equal. Hinata stays close to Atsumu while looking sadly at Sakusa. “Don’t pity me Hinata.” Sakusa tells the little giant. “Don’t- Don’t” Sakusa’s chest is heaving and he begins to cough as his butt hits the floor. He can’t breathe and is holding his head. Bokuto reaches out to him but he smacks his hand away, breaking down in front of his teammates.

Hinata and Atsumu get closer but Hinata holds Atsumu back from stepping any further. “He needs space, get back.” Hinata was always respectful of his senpai’s germaphobic tendencies, Bokuto takes steps back as well. “Omi-San,” he calls out to him. “Listen to me alright. Can you count with me?” They both start counting together in 5′s. Sakusa’s hands were shaking. “Omi-San can you look at me?” He does. “It’s gonna be ok, I promise. We’re going to help you do whatever you want to ok, Omi-san?” Sakusa begins to come back to himself and Bokuto hands him a water bottle.

Atsumu kneels in front of him torn. “Omi-Omi... I’m sorry- I didn’t know. I thought you told her.”

He waves the setter off. “It’s not your fault for saying something I should have said a long time ago.” Sakusa bites the inside of his cheek as he stands up.

“What are you going to do Omi-san? I’m sure Y/N-chan will forgive you, you just have to-”

Sakusa cuts Hinata off. “I’m not going to do anything.” He tells them. “She deserves a lot better than me.” Then he just walks away from them.

And while he wholeheartedly believes that he doesn’t deserve you, he still can’t help but want to try. Because even if this started off as some silly bet, he loved you, more than he ever thought he could. He still wanted to give you the world, because you were his.

A/N: Ahhhhh that was exciting. I was originally going to make this shorter and do more of the characters but I found myself just writing and not stopping. I hope the panic attack scene wasn’t too bad for some of you. I’ve had maybe 1 or two and I wish there would have been someone there to help me through it. Pt.2??

Requests

#sakusa #sakusa kiyoomi #haikyu #angst #fluff #atsumu #hinata #bokuto #sakusa x reader #y/n #sakusa x y/n #msby #black jackals #sakusa angst

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kpopinesss · 5 years

Text

[ateez] S A N ➱ baby daddy au

YOU HAVE TO RAISE HIS SON AFTER HE LEAVES. MAFIA SAN.

warnings: teen pregnancy

a/n: sorry ya’ll I accidentally posted this on my main lol - @atinybitofau

• raising a son on your own was hard.

• raising a son whose genes were on par to his notorious father was even harder—

• a hooligan. a mischievous troublemaker.

• an eyesore in morality.

• and yes, your son was just like him.

• cold. ruthless. blood thirsty.

• but unlike San, your son loved you enough never to leave you.

• appreciated the things you did for him enough to stay.

• “Eomma..”

• you turn on your side when your son interrupts your slumber,

• injuries blatant on his tethered arm.

• raising a child who’s now 13 since you were 16 never easy.

• “Where were you, Ari?”

• he sits at the edge of your bed and leans for the warmth only a mother could give. “I was trying to get your medicine.. but I ended up causing a scene and the store owner kicked me out.”

• you sigh letting him lay down beside you. “It’s just a little cold. You don’t need to go and risk your life to save mine.”

• he wants to ask you.

• he’s old enough..

• why hasn’t his father came back to be the one the take care of you?

• to take care of him.

• why do you have to suffer alone?

• “Ari, just do me a favor and take care of yourself the way you do for me.” you cuddle into your sons warmth too. “That’s all I need.”

• but you’re lying.

• you’re getting sicker.

• and he can’t take it anymore.

• he goes to lower than the low to find something to save you, his mother.

• eventually ending up tied up in San’s gang house.

• brutally beat for intervening a drug heist—

• “Alright you little shit,” San holds your son up by the collar, blood running down his face mixed with his tears. “I don’t care that you’re 13 years old. Hell you could’ve been 10 and I’ll still beat the living crap out of you. No one just comes barging into a drug heist for no reason. That’s not just a coincidence.”

• it is.

• it really is.

• and maybe god was just giving him a sign.

• because you were on the verge of dying—

• and his own son being dealt his life and in the hands of his own father,

• yet San still didn’t know what was going on.

• what sign god was trying to give him.

• “I have to admit.” San runs a finger down his son’s chiseled jaw and smirks. “You’ve got a nice face. But in a couple minutes, you might not even be able to recognize it anymore.”

• “I-I-I was just trying to get medicine for my mom! I swear.”

• San really needed to get a clue.

• not all drugs were recreational.

• and some—

• some can actually save lives not just make dirty money.

• “You think I’ll believe that sissy crap?”

• Ari shudders looking to his torn up jeans. “H-her pictures in my wallet. I swear, she’s the only thing I’ll do anything illegal for. I promise I wasn’t trying to fuck anything up. She’d kill me if I got involved. Kill herself if I pushed myself too far.”

• he’s convinced at the desperation in the poor kid’s voice.

• normally not as merciful but he digs through the kid’s pocket for the picture anyway.

• and he should be glad he did because shit—

• the picture of you made him go from 100 to 0 real quick.

• “Y/n?”

• “T-that’s her! That’s my mom.”

• San glances up at the beat up kid, horrified.

• horrified at the sight.

• that he was basically beating to death a walking replica of himself.

• an age far enough that fit the time he left you.

• “You’re telling me my high school sweetheart..” San’s bloody fingers curl around your picture. “The woman you’ve been trying to steal medication for is your mom? The woman in this picture.”

• he’s at first in denial.

• that the kid he almost beat to death was your son.

• but denial hits him even harder the chances he could also be the father.

• “M-my mom is everything to me.” Ari bawls his last tears out begging for his own father to spare his life. or anything to save yours. “She’s only got me. I’ve only got her. S-sir please. At least save her. If you wanna kill me sir, please save my mom first.”

• his jaw clenches,

• still knealt down on one knee propped in front of his pleading son.

• studying every feature of his face.

• how on par everything was to his own.

• San was beating up his son, he realized.

• holy shit he was about to kill his own son.

• “Why didn’t she tell me?”

• “W-what?” his son chokes. “What do you mean?”

• “Fucking hell— kid, I think I’m your dad.”

• the five days that your son was held captive was long enough for your body to grow cold and weaker.

• laying in a hospital bed nearly blacked out.

• your son cries over your body as you sleep.

• hoping he’s not too late.

• not too late to give you the one thing that might be able to keep you alive.

• a husband?

• finally a father to your child.

• “You’re the husband?” the doctor finds San watching from the doorway awkwardly glancing at the black dressed men who towered behind him. “You’ve got quite the entourage there, sir. But not even an army of soldiers would be able to save your wife right now. She’s hanging on a thin line. Barely holding on. That woman needs a miracle if she wants to live the next good years of her life.”

• San watches as his son that he never knew about cries over you.

• wishes you would’ve told him..

• he would’ve stayed.

• would’ve loved you.

• why were you always so selfish? always wanting to do things that pushed you too far even if there were another option available.

• “Eomma.”

• you hear everything.

• your son.

• San.

• “Ma, I’m sorry I wasn’t able to get the medicine. I got into trouble again, ma. I’m sorry.” Ari folds his hand over your limp one’s. “B-but I have something even better. Someone who could help you and me. He can take care of us, ma.”

• it hurts.

• you want to wake up for your son because he deserves the world.

• he deserves a fight for the both of you but the option you chose came short.

• in the past, the option of never telling San in the first place of his own son.

• “Ma.. he’s gonna talk to you okay? I’m gonna let him talk to you.” Ari sniffles and suddenly your hand gets replaced with a different warmth. “He’s gonna tell you it’s gonna be okay. I love you, eomma. I love you. We’re gonna be okay.”

• it’s almost enough.

• your heart beats a little faster.

• burns a little more so you could breathe on your own.

• it’s definitely working.

• “You shoulda told me, bubba.”

• the nickname San had given you years ago,

• a nickname you thought you’d never hear again, rings in your ear and that light so far away,

• it gets further.

• “You shoulda told me about him. About you.” he lifts your hand against his trembling lips. “13 years? 13 years after I tell you to take care of yourself and now you’re almost dying. Come on now. My girl was a fighter. Pushed herself harder than she wanted to.”

• his voice is like a mantra—

• a dream that gives you a little bit more of life you we’re starting to lose.

• “Bubba, you were the love of my life. And I didn’t tell you enough how much I appreciated you. I know it may be too late and if god forbid I do lose you, I will make sure our baby stays safe okay?”

• you think if you were awake right now you’d be crying.

• as if a weight lifted off your shoulders.

• cause the one person who could save you right now—you and your son,

• was right here.

• ready to go merciless to keep you two safe.

• “I left loving you. And I’ll come back loving you. 13 years only kept us apart. But let me tell you, y/n, it never stopped me from loving you.”

• he’s unsure when he lets go of your hand.

• usually gets what he wants with one word—

• cause he’s a notorious mobster.

• but let’s just say you were the one thing he wanted he could’ve never gotten even with two words.

• 3?

• “I love you.” he continues. “And if I’m gonna have to love our son the way I should’ve loved you then so be it.”

• but life’s not like movies where you wake up right during a miracle.

• this miracle takes time.

• and after an EXPENSIVE deal of money and medicine to keep you alive,

• a year it takes for you to finally open your eyes.

• to a nice hospital bed room.

• filled with flowers and the reminiscent scent of old spice and San.

• your hair’s a bit longer.

• the sun’s definitely brighter.

• but not as bright as the smile you see once you turn to the side.

• “Good morning beautiful.” San reaches his forehead against yours. “How were your dreams?”

• you choke on a decent reply. “S-San?”

• “The one and only.”

• “Where’s— Where’s Ari? Where’s my—“

• “Our?” San chuckles softly. “You mean our son.”

• you kind of remember.

• it takes a while to remember the voices and the dreams in your head.

• how waking up to find them real was surreal on its own.

• “He’s at school, bubba.” San cradles your face in the palm of his hand staring at you like he was hypnotized. “I’ll have someone pick him up. Tell him mommy’s awake.”

• “San..” you shake your head in his hand. “How is this real?”

• “Our son might be a miracle worker. Brought us together the way we made him. Brought me so I could keep you alive.”

• cheesy as you remember.

• although this handsome and older version of your old flame you aren’t too sure.

• “So you just show up while I’m in a coma and play daddy while I sleep?” you hoarsely chuckle while he smiles against your lips. “Even after 13 years, you won’t grudge against me for not telling you?”

• “I can’t blame you for trying to save yourselves.” he admits with his lips still on yours. “I wasn’t good enough for you. I know still I’m not. But I’m gonna try this time. Even if I have to pretend I’m not who I am sometimes.”

• you two are interrupted by a crying teenager.

• one you remembered resembled San.

• but now them standing right next to each other,

• looking like two carbon copies and a surreal dream in your head.

• maybe you are dead...

• “Ma!” he shoves his father away abruptly. “Look ma! I brought dad! He helped pay your debt, pays for my school. Even finished the hospital bills.”

• you glare at your always boisterous ex boyfriend and long lost father to your son.

• “You did what?”

• “Did I mention this was my way of getting back at you for not telling me about my 14 year old son?”

• “San how the hell am I gonna pay you back?”

• you just woke up.

• and the doctor runs in ready to sedate to keep you stable for at least more than 24 hours.

• but the way San looks at you is enough.

• him being there like your life long medication itself.

• holding your hand while your son holds your other one proposing,

• “Marry me. And we can call it even.”

@atinybitofau

#ateez #ateez san #choi san #ateez imagines #ateez reactions #ateez scenarios #ateez preferences #ateez oneshot #ateez x reader #san x reader #san imagines #san reactions #san scenarios #san oneshot #san mafia au #ateez mafia au #san baby daddy au #ateez dad au

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blndspotting · 4 years

Text

your voice.

↳ characters|| tendo satori

↳ category || fluff , written + smau

↳ summary 📝|| you come home from a long day and and tendo decides to call you. though you prefer to text, tendo always calls you instead of texting and you finally decide to ask him why

↳ love letter 💌|| hello hi im back from mini hiatus. i missed writing on here. i just needed a break from everything but im back woo! just a few things: i this is technically gn!reader idk my brain is on elevator music mode currently. content warning for mentions of food.

↳ word count ✎|| 769

you walked into the door of your apartment dropping all your stuff by the door not caring anything spilled out of your bag. you remove your coat and shoes, feeling immediate relief in the balls of your feet that had been aching all day. you decided to work late today, as you had been running late and a wave of drowsiness slowly crept over you, a yawn leaving your lips. though, it was like you could hear your bed calling your name, you decide to eat first. you decide that out of convenience (and just a smidge of laziness) you’ll have leftovers from the previous night. Even though it was something you made all the time, it tasted way better knowing that this was your first meal since breakfast.

you thought to yourself, “if tendo were here he would tell me “[name], you HAVE to eat. if you don’t, how are you going to keep the amazing figure i love?” you giggled thinking about him and his silly nature and you then remembered how much you wanted him to come back to japan already. He recently had to go back to paris for work and even though he would be returning in a couple of weeks, you longed for his body to once again hold yours. removing yourself out of your train of thought, continuing to eat and thinking about the weekend ahead of you. checking your phone and seeing the forecast called for rain the next two days, you decide to stay in and enjoy [insert rainy day activity you enjoy]. Still on your phone, you proceed to open messages and text your partner.

you ponder as to why he stopped answering your texts until

you pick up the call before it ends

“h-hi” you said feeling nervous. why the hell am i nervous? i've been dating satori since the beginning of college?

“i don’t know. why ARE you nervous?” tendo asked quizzically. it was like you could almost see the look on his face.

“i said that aloud?”

“yes you did, my lovely s/o. yes you did.” you hear him chuckle at you.

“hey! don’t laugh”

“i can’t help it! you are adorable, [name].” you smile.

there's a comfortable silence between you both before you decide to speak up.

“i hope i didn’t wake you up, ‘tori.”

“it’s already 11am here, don't worry sweetheart.” you giggle at the nickname

“oh, nevermind then. i thought it was pretty early over there.”

“hey no, its okay. timezones are dumb i get your confusion”

another stint of comfortable silence passes. this was the first time you two had talked since tendo’s first day back in paris. and even though you missed him, you wondered why he had called you so early

“you really could've of just texted me. is there a reason you called?” you hear him suck in a breath, almost as if the question had caught him off guard.

“well- uhm i-...”

“spit it out, t!”

“i just missed your voice” he answered, his reply barely above a whisper.

“y-you what?”

“i missed your voice, [name]. i missed you and your voice.” he said, this time way clearer than his first response.

“oh”, you pause, “well i missed you and your lovely voice too ya goof.” you smile

you two continue to talk for maybe about an hour until a yawn leaves your lips.

“babe please go to sleep.”

“no, i want to-” another yawn escapes your lips “talk to you” you continued your protest to sleeping.

“okay,” tendo started finally giving into your stubborn nature “how about i stay on the phone and talk with you until you fall asleep? how does that sound.”

“okay” you said, satisfied with the solution.

meanwhile in france…

“okay so. how was work love?” tendo prompted. silence.

“...babe?” tendo was then met with a quiet snore and he giggled.

“goodnight, [insert pet name]. i know you can’t hear me but get some rest, you deserve it. i’ll see you when i get home tomorrow. i love you.” he whispered smiling to himself before hanging up the call.

tendo stared at his phone allowing it to lock so he could look at his phone background of the both of you and looking at the time. 12:35. realizing the time, tendo left the secluded area he was in whilst he was talking to you and went back to his seat at his airport terminal. fifteen more minutes he thought to himself. Fifteen more minutes and he’d be on a non-stop flight from paris to japan, coming home early to surprise you.

notes

bruh i tried my hardest with the time conversions please don't clown me lol. also it feels so nice writing again omg i missed it so much ahhh. also i have a mini-au idea so watch out for that hehe. okay its kinda late for me so goodnight!

#tendou satori #tendou scenarios #haikyuu!! x reader #tendou x reader #haikyuu tendou #tendo satori #haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #tendou oneshot #tendou fluff #hq x reader #tendou satori x reader

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mochuelovelli · 4 years

Note

Character ask, Donald Duck (Ducktales version)

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!!!~

How do I feel about this character?:

Honestly, I didn't think I'd ever stan Donald Duck in my life but here we are. I super love how he’s such a carrying yet flawed parental figure and how it was show cased early on in the beginning of the series. He is literally the most unlucky person in the world, him being such a amazing single dad for 10 years in SPITE of that??? Now that’s a fucking superhero if I ever seen one, move over Gizmo and Darkwing lol.

Romantic ships w/ this character?:

I have a lot of vanilla ships for him lol. Donsy, the three gay caballeros, PKUno, PKGyro, Donmick - lol I got no self control. I mainly ship him with Daisy in the dt17 series (and only pretty much in the dt17 series lol) but I have a headcanon that he dated the other cabs during college and circa Della getting yeet’d to the moon. He’s got a rule for his name, all people he considers “friends” or close family would call him “Don” but his partners would call him “Donnie” or some combo of that nickname. One time Gladstone tried to call him Donnie as a joke and Donald was like “please call me literally anything else or we are never speaking again” so Gladstone’s many nicknames for his cousin are purely petty from then onward. (another reason why he hadn’t seen Gladstone for such a long time).

Non-Romantic ships w/ this character?:

Him and Huey for sure! They are so similar in the series its crazy lol. I would want their interactions to expand upon Huey’s fear of giving into his anger in the Istanbird ep be in part due because he sees how Donald acts. He knows it can help in certain situations but he hates not being able to control his emotions and think rationally. This would include both of them having spend time in earlier eps making progress in handling their anger and utilizing it well. Donald can still be Donald, in fact I would like to see Huey having a better handle on his emotions not only because he started thinking critically about it

Unpopular opinion about this character?:

I...think Don’s character development peaked in “whatever happened to donald duck?!” and while I’m very happy he found happiness with daisy I find that I don’t care of the “D-list” band dad he’s being portrayed as now.

Something I wish would have happened/ will happen in canon?:

Well, mainly what happens in my Fix-It Au but for the sake of keeping this brief, I'll talk about another want. Ever since "The First Adventure!" came out, it reignited my want for Della and Donald's angst but not just about the kids but towards each other. In that ep, we can see that Donald was always fiercely protective of his family (that he really cared for). To the point where he'd fly into a blind rage at the slightest suspicion that they were hurt. Comparatively, Della is much more laid back where even tho she was the one who nearly died, she just ran straight back into the action. I imagine she would've teased Donald about it later, "Awww, I didn't know you cared so much, Don!" Or something like that lol.

I think along side HDLW (especially Huey) reflecting on the traits passed down from their parental figures, Donald and Della having a discussion or an admittance of feeling like "the lesser twin" would be sooooo good! They love in such radically different ways and sometimes they think it's too different to be functional. That despite wanting to change it's not enough, they are still the "disappointment". Maybe this convo could come after a similar incident like in New Gods on the Block where Della gets pissed at Scrooge but goes a step beyond and reflects on how for so long she's been blindly loyal to him. How in doing so, it hurt her kids and reminded her of times when he made her and Donald feel like that. Donald can have a bit of the opposite take, for so long his stubbornness and borderline hatred of Scrooge deprived the boys of the life he knew they deserved. How he shut himself off to everyone for so long, how it ate at him. How much he wished he could've been like his sister and just...talk it out. Move on.

They both got a lot to work on, even near the series end, but they will work on it together.

#donald duck #dt17 #ducktales #character ask meme #donsy #the three cabarellos #pk donald #thank you for the ask!#now on to the hop pop and sasha asks lol

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bethanysnow · 3 years

Text

-30 questions-

ITagged by @illicitfuck

1) name/nickname: Bethany is my name I also am known by Ace, Snow, and Acesblizzard depending on whomst you are

2) star sign: Leo x3

3) height: 5′9-5′10

4) birthday: August 20th

5) favorite bands: Måneskin, Queen, Led zeppelin, MCR, ACDC, CCR, Blink 182, President of the united states (yes its a band)

6) time: 11:05 am

7) favorite solo artists: Cass Elliot, Etta James, Ella Fitzgerald, Aretha Franklin, Anthony Ramos,

8) song stuck in your head: Måneskin - For your love, and Teenage dirtbag from wheatus

9) last movie you watched: Princess and the frog

10) Dream Trip: the UK.

11) Last Show: Black Butler

12) When I Created This Blog: This has been my one blog for so fuckin long. Since back in like 2010

13) What I Post: I mainly use it as a moodboard blog or aesthetic posts, but do post Måneskin content on occasion

14) Last thing I googled: D&D beyond

15) Other Blogs: nope

16) Do I get asks? Not really, would love some though-

17) Why I Chose My URL: My name is Beth, and I am from alaska where it snows? I love winter and my whole blog turns xmas in december.

18) Following: 227

19) Followers: 922

20) Average Hours Of Sleep: 6 to 8

21) Lucky Number: 6

22) Instruments: Cello, I also sing lowkey. Thinking me and @icouldbeyourpuppet and @illicitfuck could do a faux band thing lol

23) What Am I Wearing: a black and white sleep dress?

24) Dream Job: WEDDING PLANNER! Or museum curator. Museum curator has health insurance so thats what I plan on doing.

25) Favorite Food: Moose tracks ice cream with waffle cone bites

26) Tea or Coffee: Coffee in the morning, tea for the rest of the day

27) Nationality: I am from Alaska- tecnically from the U.S but fuck that noise

28) Favorite Song: MÅ's discography, or cleopatra by the luminers

29) Last Book I Read: Spoiler alert by oliva dade

30) Top 3 Fictional Universes I Would Like To Live In:

MCU if I got to be my anti hero OC, A lot of dnd worlds that I wont get into, or black butler AU.

Tagging folks like @oro-e-diamanti @icouldbeyourpuppet @bidet-and-legolas @daddydamiano

ALSO LOOK AT THEIR CONTENT THEY ARE ALL AMAZING FOLKS! I love that I have met them through music and the love of this band. They make me so happy. Their content is amazing, and all of them are spectacular writers who deserve so much love! SO everyone go look and follow

#måneskin #Makin friends over the internet #30 questions #I was tagged

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mangekyuou · 4 years

Text

NOBODY BUT YOU ━ﾞ

⁺◟ CHARACTERS . . . kujo jotaro fem!reader kujo jolyne ‘ holly

⁺◟ GENRE . . . au fluff oneshot

⁺◟ SYNOPSIS . . . ( y/n ) is the princess of ( k/n ) and her family wishes for her to marry an honorable prince from another kingdom in order to form an alliance through marriage. but ( y/n ) has eyes for one man and one man only. her butler, jotaro, who shares a mutual love.

⁺◟ TRIGGER WARNINGS . . . mentions of blood ‘ wounds ‘ violence internalized misogyny ‘ bad parents ‘ killing ( but no one dies ) ‘ weapons

⁺◟ WORD COUNT . . . 4.4k.

⁺◟ COMMENTARY . . . probably a little ooc jotaro for this one because he’s actually pretty kind in this one lol. i hope it’s not too much though. i was told to write a oneshot, instead i felt like i wrote a plot for a short story. this now my second longest fic. there’s just something about jotaro that makes me wanna act up when i write about them. ( f/n ) ‘ father’s name ‘ ( m/n ) ‘ mother’s name ‘ ( k/n ) ‘ kingdom’s name ‘ ( h/n ) ‘ horse’s name

“Jojo, you do not have to hide, I know you’re there.”

A woman spoke up, as she sat on the edge of her bed looking out toward the wide window a few feet from her bed, closed, boarded up from the outside at the discretion of her own mother. Through the cracks, sunlight peered into the room alongside the other much smaller windows on the same stone wall.

She stretched, a sigh leaving her lips followed by a yawn. She looked over her shoulder looking her now wide-open door, there in the door frame stood a man with the height of just about two meters with his back turned to her.

The young woman giggled, “Are you shy, Jojo? Or...do you just do not like my appearance?”

“I am not shy nor do I dislike your appearance, princess. You are just underdressed and it would be appreciated if you were to cover yourself before I can attend to you,” The man answered, his voice was rough and a little mean sounding but she knew he meant no harm by it.

That name. Princess. Her title.

“Jojo, you know you don’t have to call me Princess, right? I mean, we’re friends, right? And I am the same age as you. You can just call me by my name,” She added, standing up from her glamorous bed and walking over to put on a silk robe that was gifted to her from a friend of her mother.

The man hummed, “I do know that...( y/n ) but out of respect for both you and your family, I have to refrain from referring to you so improperly and I must address you by your title.”

Princess ( y/n ), first and only daughter of ( f/n ) ( l/n ) and ( m/n ) ( l/n ) of the lovely kingdom of ( k/n ). A kingdom that prides itself on all of its resources natural and human. And it would one day be all ( y/n )’s one day in the near future.

As she was the only child her mother could bear, she cursed from the beginning of her life to take the throne when she would become an adult, as her mother did not bear a son.

It would all be hers...alongside a man, she would probably be forced to marry from another kingdom to form some type of alliance to share a throne she didn’t want in the first place.

She was a young princess, a bit curvy around the edges with the attention of many suitors from her own kingdom and those from afar. Men near and far would do just about anything to even catch a glimpse from her. Who could blame them? She was young, attractive, strong, could defend herself, independent, and very rebellious against her parents and everything her kingdom stood for.

Her rebellious behavior and independent attitude were not what ( k/n ) stood for and she knew that which made it all the better. She prided herself in not being like the princesses before herself. She didn’t want to be like her mother, she didn’t want to be like her ancestors. She wanted to be much more than that.

She wanted to be free of her duties and to live a quiet life outside of the kingdom. Away from the stress. Away from the suitors who wanted nothing more than to marry her, turn her into a powerless walking baby carriage, and strip her of her independence and strength by force, if necessary.

( y/n ) had learned from a young age to not trust the men around her, for that very same reason. Not even her own father, who wanted to marry her off years ago to ensure the kingdom would survive another 100 years and he would get grandchildren.

She had been failed by people she had trusted and was starting to lose hope that there was really anyone out there who she could trust.

And that’s when she met him. The man who stood at her door frame with his back facing her. The man who always made her heart flutter no matter what he did.

Jotaro.

A descendant of the Joestar bloodline, the direct descendant of the great and gentle soul Jonathan Joestar who fought against evil to avenge his father’s tragic death, dying himself before it was all done. Grandson of the cocky bastard whose legendary battle stories traveled across the world, Joseph Joestar.

Despite his bloodline, Jotaro had seemed to be the opposite of both his grandfather and his great-great-grandfather. He was, at first, delinquent. His name was known across the kingdom fairly quickly for a young man.

It all had started after a misunderstanding. A man had swung at him first and he simply defended himself, beating the man almost to death without even batting an eyelash. The incident quickly became known across the kingdom.

He would get into much more trouble after that but nothing that brought the king’s attention to him, that was of course before ( y/n ) had suddenly became involved.

The young princess had left the castle without her guards when she was supposed to be asleep. She had wandered into a pub on the outskirts of the kingdom in disguise, where she danced on top of a table until one of the few customers at the pub had tried to grab at her.

As the unknown man grabbed her wrist with one hand, with the other he pulled out a small dagger that was clearly homemade as the blade looked a bit uneven, but it sure was sharp as it pierced through the skin on her neck and drew blood.

The rest was a blur to her, the next thing she remembered was waking up in someone else’s bed, being looked after by a fair-headed woman with emerald eyes with a gentle smile. She learned her name, Holly.

Before she could explain, her son walked in, Jotaro. He had explained what happened and why she was here, as it slowly started to come back to her. When she returned back the castle, there she saw a huge search for not only her but a search for Jotaro as well.

Before she could find him and warn him, he was already found and arrested. There she ran, she ran home to the castle and that’s when she saw a sight that still haunts her dreams to this day.

Jotaro in a guillotine with both of her parents eagerly watching the scene before them. She let out a terrible shriek, gathering everyone’s attention before she ran through the crowd that was slowly forming to watch Jotaro’s execution. As she laid her head under the blade, crying, “DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL! LEAVE HIM BE! THIS MAN SAVED MY LIFE! YOU KILL HIM, YOU KILL ME! YOU’LL KILL THE FUTURE OF THIS KINGDOM AS WELL!”

He, along with everyone else, was surprised by her actions. The princess of ( k/n ) had laid her head down on the guillotine in order to save a commoner.

The crowd began to murmur, rumors began to spread. The execution was called off and Jotaro was set free...or at least he thought. While the crowd settled down, ( m/n ) had offered him anything he had wanted in order to keep him out of the picture, knowing he would ruin ( y/n ) precious image in the other kingdoms.

He declined her offer, saying those words that ( y/n ) would never forget, as it was the first moment she had ever felt her heart race for someone. It was like she knew she had loved him.

“I don’t want your money, your jewels...I don’t want anything you can give. What you can do is listen to your daughter, Queen ( m/n ). It doesn’t seem like you don’t do a lot of that. Take care, Princess ( y/n ).”

“I’m decent now, Jojo. You can turn around,” ( y/n ) added, leaning against one of the nightstands, folding her arms across her chest.

He looked around her room, “It is awfully late for you to be just waking up, your highness. Where are your maids?”

She sighed, “I sent them away. I didn’t want to get out of bed today. I told them I have come down with something and I do not wish to get them sick. Getting those old women to leave me alone is such a pain in my sides. They kept insisting until I had to literally push them out of the room and shut the door. I can’t catch a break around here I guess.”

“Well, you are meeting another suitor today, your highness,” He pointed out, his eyes had traveled down to his feet. Just saying those words made him sick. He hated when young woman had to meet suitors. Every prince that had walked through those doors didn’t want a companion to spend the rest of their days with, they wanted a woman they could return to whenever they wanted. He knew boys his age, they didn’t want marriage and they damn sure didn’t deserve the woman standing before him in a silk robe.

When she asked him to be her butler, he declined. He didn’t want to work for the very kingdom he didn’t want to be apart of and wanted him either dead or behind bars in a dungeon. But she didn’t give up and she had bothered him for weeks on end, begging him to be her personal butler and he would not have to answer to any of the kingdom staff and he could live on castle grounds with his mother if he pleased.

Growing tired of her begging, he finally accepted under the condition that his mother would not be treated like a maid, which ( y/n ) accepted as she had grown fond of Holly.

After spending more time with her, he realized his true feelings. The way his heart raced and how hard it was to hide even the slightest blush when she called him by his nickname, Jojo. How she trusted him even more than she trusted the castle staff who she had grown up knowing. How her soft hands would graced his own.

He had accepted that he was in love with her almost a year ago before her mother began to truly force courtship down ( y/n )’s throat in order to take the throne. She didn’t take it laying down, which was another thing he loved about her. Her rebellion toward her family and the traditional way of things.

“Oh, that’s right. Some wealthy prince where to buy his way into a marriage he doesn’t plan on putting effort into. I’ll pass,” She joked, making Jotaro give her a small smile.

“Did the cold Jotaro just...smile?”

“Shut up.”

“I’m just messing with you, Jojo. So what should we do today instead of meeting my suitor? I was thinking we make a break for it with ( h/n ) and run out of ( k/n )’s gates at full speed. They’ll never be able to catch us!”

He raised an eyebrow, “Are you crazy? You’ll get me killed. Your mother already has a bounty on my head and is ready to kill me off at any moment. We are not to leave ( k/n ), especially not together. There are already rumors still floating through the kingdom about the two of us.”

Her face fell. The rumors, she almost forgot about those. The rumors of them being in a relationship. The rumors of him corrupting her and taking her innocence. While they hurt his image, they had pretty much tainted hers.

She would pretend they wouldn’t hurt, but they did, they always did. He knew that and he offered to disappear but she never wanted him to leave her or she would truly never trust anyone.

Jotaro let out a sigh, walking over to her, putting a finger on her chin to make her look up at him. It sent chills down her spine, looking at him like this with those blue-green eyes of his. He was even more gorgeous up close.

“Do not be sad, your highness. A rose bath will make you feel nice. I’ll fix your bath. While you bathe, I will clean your room. And then after, I will escort you to the main hall where your parents are waiting for you. ”

She nodded, “Thank you, Jojo.”

“No problem.”

He did just as he told, fixing her bath, pouring hot water into her wooden bathtub, filling it with rose red and pink rose petals before heading to her room where he “cleaned” as she bathed and relaxed. She was pretty much a clean woman already, there was much to clean besides some dusty spots. His eyes kept darting to the boarded-up window.

‘They truly do wish to lock her away like she is some animal, huh?’

The door to the room opened to reveal a familiar-looking woman, who wore a scowl on her face. ( y/n )’s handmaiden, “You should not be in here alone with Princess ( y/n ). You know the rules, Kujo. Should we relay them to you once more?”

He rolled his eyes, “I do not need your rules. You shouldn’t assume the worst of your princess now, should you?”

“Who are you to threaten me?!”

“You said my name, you know who I am. Princess ( y/n ) is currently in the bath and is getting ready to―”

The handmaiden blinked, “DID YOU SEE HER INDECENT?!”

“You are awfully protective for someone who jumps to conclusions.”

“Isabel, enough!” ( y/n )’s firm voice sounded through the room. The two looked over toward the bathroom door to see the young princess wearing nothing but a towel wrapped around her body tightly, covering all it needed to, “Jojo has done nothing and has been always been nice and expected my boundaries, unlike the suitors you, mother and father try to marry me off to. He did not see me indecent and nothing has happened. Please do not assume the worst of him. He is only doing the job I asked him too.”

With a regretful look on her face, she turned to him. Their eyes locked, “You may leave now, Jojo. I should get ready for my suitor.” She turned to Isabel, “You too. I wish to dress myself this evening.”

The two bowed, going toward the door. Isabel had walked out, leaving the two young adults for a moment. She gave him a little smile, “I’ll be fine.”

“You’re planning something...aren’t you?”

“You know me so well. Wear the cutest suit you can find at home. I’ll be looking forward to it.” She gave him a wink. He did as he always did, pretended not to care and just walk off...before...he stopped, “Thanks for sticking up for me.”

“No problem. It was wrong of her to accuse you like that.”

“Have I told you how beautiful you look tonight, Princess? And your dress really compliments you in all of the right ways.”

Silence.

“Princess? Princess ( y/n )?”

The young princess rapidly blinked, turning to the young man standing to her side dressed in an outlandish suit that was crafted to his tastes. She shook her head, “My apologies, my head seems to be somewhere else at the moment. Could you repeat what you said?”

The young prince cleared his throat, gesturing toward her dress, “I said that you look absolutely beautiful tonight. Your dress truly compliments you in all of the right ways.”

( y/n ) looked down to the blush-colored dress she wore, one she pretty much squeezed herself, the tight corset crushing her sides only added to the extreme discomfort she felt along with being with him, the newest suitor.

Prince Andrew from a neighboring kingdom known for their crops. A man on the shorter side with ginger hair and pretty bad achy across his face. He was probably the least interesting of the many suitors who had asked for her hand in marriage so it was easy for her to get lost in her thoughts. All he talked about was how gorgeous she was and how an alliance between their two kingdoms would be amazing.

He lost her after hello. Besides she was too busy thinking about the man who occupied her heart. His smile, his eyes, his charm.

( y/n ) gave the young ginger prince a small smile, patting him on the back as a friend, “Prince Andrew, you must forgive me but I want to be honest with you because I see something in you that I never saw in any of my other suitors.”

“A possible alliance and marriage?” His eyes sparkled.

“Heavens no. Don’t get me wrong, you’re a sweet, smart, and talented man and I know any woman would be happy to be your queen, but I’m not one of them. We could be really good friends, but I don’t see a future marriage between us. We can still have an alliance, just not one through marriage,” She explained.

His head fell just below his shoulders and a sad expression printed on his face. She rubbed his back gently, “Prince Andrew, please do not sad.”

“There is a man who holds to key to your heart already, isn’t there?”

She stayed silent, letting out a sigh.

“The man...who holds your heart, is he a commoner?”

“He is.”

“That is why you do not wish to meet suitors. Your heart belongs to a commoner. I see. Does...does he love you too?”

She shrugged her shoulders, “I’m not sure. I don’t think so.”

“The commoner that you adore, is he Jotaro Kujo of the Joestar bloodline?”

“How did you...”

“We know all, Princess ( y/n ). When you threw yourself under a guillotine for him, talk began to spread not only through your kingdom but through all of the kingdoms. It is why your parents are ready to marry you off so fast. So you don’t end up marrying him and mixing your precious bloodline with that of the shameful Joestar bloodline. Why do you think he has yet to show up despite being your personal butler?”

“You know something I don’t know. Prince Andrew, I demand you to tell me! WHY HAS HE NOT SHOWN UP?!”

She grabbed the ginger by his collar, her hands shaking in fear of the unknown. Andrew let out a shaky sigh, “We were told Jotaro would be taken care of. He had two options. He could either let you go and leave as nothing happened or...”

“They’ll kill him. Andrew where do they plan to kill him?!”

“I’m not sure. I saw soldiers marching to the east gate.”

“That’s not far! Thank you so much, Andrew!” She released the ginger’s collar, placing a sweet kiss on his cheek, causing him to blush a deep shade of red.

She ran in the way of the east gate, praying that she would make it in time. Her dress starting to rip and shred in the tree branches and bushes, while it began to blackened from dust and dirt. During her run, she lost both her shoes and most of the bodice of her dress which was probably stuck on a stray tree branch. Cuts and scratches covered her arms and collarbones, but none of the stings got to her. The adrenaline in her body being the reason.

In her vision, she could see it. East gate. She could see a few torches and horses. As she got closer, running now through the grass she saw two soldiers, fully armed with swords in a hand the reigns of their horse in the other.

On the ground, in front of the soldiers there, he was in a now tattered suit, Jotaro.

“No...”

“We are giving you the chance to live and leave Princess ( y/n ) so she can be happy. Don’t you want her to be happy?” One of the soldiers spoke.

Jotaro whipped the corner of his mouth, glaring at the soldier, “Of course I want her to be happy but why would she happy among you liars and corrupted people. I’m not leaving this shitty kingdom without her. If you’re going to kill me then kill me. My mother will still be around to watch over ( y/n ) for me until we meet again in the afterlife because I know that she can protect herself from here on out and she’ll never let a man walk all over her ever again whether I walk out of here alive or not. And because I never got to say it allowed to her, I want to say it now so I do not die with regrets. I have come to the terms with it. I love her. I love ( y/n ).”

His confession made her heart race, as tears formed in her eyes. He did love her back. She made herself now, stepping out of the tall grass, Jotaro seeing the tattered blush-colored dress first and then her face, “ ( y/n )! What are you doing here?! Why aren’t you at the ball?!”

The young princess walked to his side, kneeling next to him, taking his hand into hers, “I said it once and I’ll say it again no matter how many times it takes. You kill him, you kill me! I wish for the same brutal death that he gets because I love him too!”

Jotaro looked to the young princess with a shocked look. She shared his feelings.

“And if I’m not marrying him then I do not wish to marry at all! Now take your sword and finish us! Do your worst!”

“WOAH! MOM DID THAT?! SHE’S SO COOL!”

Jotaro let out a little chuckle watching his now seven-year-old daughter jump and down in glee, repeating ( y/n )’s iconic phrase that she had become known for through her ongoing reign as queen of ( k/n ).

Of course, she went on to reign as queen to become queen after marrying the love of her life. It was a long road to get to that point, it was an even longer road to get her parents to let her marry him. It took a lot convincing on both sides but by some miracle one day the former king and queen caved in and said yes, as they saw that Jotaro had made ( y/n ) the strong woman she was today.

Not long after their marriage, ( y/n ) and Jotaro had become queen and king of ( k/n ). And on the day of their coronation, ( y/n ) discovered she was indeed pregnant.

Nine months later, the sweet baby girl was born.

Jolyne.

She was Jotaro’s pride and joy. ( y/n ) had already predicted that Jotaro would love her more than anything, as she watched him hold her the day she was born for hours, barely even speaking to her. Watching his eyes spark as he looked down at his daughter, it warmed her heart.

“Princess, I don’t see why you’re so excited to hear that part. I’ve told you the story of how your mother and I began dating many times.”

The black and green haired girl sat down on her bed, and folded her arms across her chest, “It’s still really cool! She took you in and made you a king.”

“That’s not―”

“That’s exactly right, Jojo,” A sweet voice chimed from behind the father-daughter duo. The two looked toward the door with the same look on their face. It was easy to tell they were related.

“MOMMY!” Jolyne climbed out of her bed, running to her mother, hugging her tightly. ( y/n ) smiled, hugging her daughter back tightly, “How is the Princess of ( k/n )?”

“Great! Just listening to Dad tell the story about how you two started dating. I want to be like you when I grow up.”

She patted her daughter’s head, “And you will be one day when you become queen. You’ll be even better than me. But it is time for the little princess to fall asleep and go to dreamland while Daddy and Mommy retire to our own chambers.”

As if it was on cue, Jolyne let out a yawn, rubbing her eyes. She slowly let go of her mother, returning back to her bed to allowing Jotaro to tuck her in tightly.

“Tomorrow, we will go to the stables and ride horses.”

“Yay!”

“Good night, Jolyne.”

“Good night, princess.”

“Good night, Mommy and Daddy.”

Jotaro kissed the top of Jolyne’s head, standing up from her bedside, blowing out the candle next to her bed, and walking out of the room with his wife. He closed the door gently, slowly inching away from it before sweeping ( y/n ) off of her feet, the woman let out a small yelp.

“J-J-Jotaro!”

“Does this bring back memories?”

( y/n ) giggled, wrapping her arms around her husband’s neck, “Of course it does. It was actually this very hallway that you picked me up and carried me down. I remember it like it was yesterday. It was the night you “tainted” me forever, as my mother says.”

“All I did was kiss you.”

“J-J-Jotaro!”

“Yes, Princess ( y/n )?”

The man chuckled lowly, pressing a gentle kiss to her lips, catching her off guard. He slowly pulled away, a dark blush formed on her cheeks as she stared at him with surprised eyes. “D-D-Do you just go around kissing girls like that?”

“Only girls named ( y/n ) ( l/n ),” He answered.

“Never took you for a romantic. You were cold and quiet. You barely even spoke to me back when first began meeting,” She pointed out.

His blue-green eyes looked into her ( e/c ) ones, “But you saved me. I’ve always been the one saving others and you saved me. You were the first person to risk your own life to save mine. Just like you, I didn’t trust many. And you walked into my life and I saved you, I expected it to end there but then they tried to kill me but you almost threw your life away for me. YOU, the Princess of ( k/n ), almost threw her life away for me, a commoner. Something changed in me that day. For a while, I didn’t know if it was good or not. But now that I have in my arms like this, I know it’s a good thing, Princess ( y/n ).”

“There you go with the title again, ruining the moment. You'll never learn huh?"

"I'll call you by your name when you marry me."

"That will be pretty soon."

⁺◟ BACK TO NAVIGATION . . .

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burningdarkfire · 3 years

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tagged by @saturdaysky, thank you! always very happy to talk about writing 🤠

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

36 on ao3, with many others left in the past on livejournal or ffnet

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

162k. it’s kind of a shame it doesn’t have the majority of my pre-2011 output as i never ported over my top four or five longest fics. i would’ve loved to see some genuine lifetime totals!

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

9 on ao3 (critrole, nier, hetalia, overwatch, trc, voltron, no. 6, star wars, tiger & bunny). if you expand trc to include anything clamp and throw in code geass then that covers everything i’ve ever published, though homestuck is by far the fandom i have the most WIPs for despite never finishing a single one and deserves a shoutout

4) What are your top five fics by kudos?

take my hand / take my whole life too: critrole, 9k, how essek and caleb’s relationship evolves through touch

blue sky, warm sun: critrole, 3.5k, six mornings caleb wakes with essek

dark night, bright stars: critrole, 3k, six nights caleb spends with essek

kitty love: star wars, 1.5k, kylo ren forms a bond with hux’s cat millicent

the walls kept tumbling down: critrole, 2k, caleb spontaneously visits essek after a hard day

commentary and further answers are below the cut!

spots 1-3 on the list are gladly accepted, given that i also think they’re some of my best and most broadly-appealing shadowgast. kitty love gets its spot despite being pure, pointless crack because it’s for a huge fandom, which is fine and fun but i don’t have a lot of personal attachment to it

the walls kept tumbling down is a surprise! it was a self-indulgent “i want a fic exactly like this to fix my mood and instead of digging through the internet for one i’ll just make one up” that i only worked on for a couple of days. i’m glad it clicked for other people!

5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

i always try to respond to comments, although sometimes a week or two pass by before i can find the energy to sit down and do it

admittedly comments have gone unanswered during months or years when i’m not writing fic and then it feels too awkward to a) go back and respond, and b) respond to any further comments on the fic even if they come in when i’m active. so instead those comments haunt my ao3 inbox forever (oops)

i do appreciate every single one though, and there are some comments that i go back to read if i need a pick-me-up just because they were so nice 😊

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

i’ll link my no. 6 fic forgive me because it still dominates my top fics in terms of hits despite being 387 words long. i wrote it in 2011 in less than half an hour, if i’m remembering correctly, and there are a few clever bits in it that i’m still quite proud of

7) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

i don’t usually write or read “pure” crossovers but i do like fusion AUs where characters from one work are imported into the setting of another work

but it’s fandom-dependent. critrole has been an outlier in that i can count on one hand the number of AU fics i’ve read and liked enough to remember. some of my favourite canon-adjacent fics veer off wildly, but they’ve still got their roots in the universe

i’ve published 17 critrole fics myself and they’re all canon-adjacent. i’m only now working on my first fusion-type AU 🤷‍♂️

8) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

i have one distinct memory of receiving criticism on a fic. in hindsight, it was constructive and pretty fair, but i was a young teen and so it still haunts me

9) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

i do!! and i’m excited about it because it’s fairly new to me!

i write to the characters, and what kind of relationship i think they’d have, but it’s probably true that my interests tend towards certain relationship dynamics

10) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i’m aware of!

11) Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes, actually! this was about about a decade ago so sadly the details have been lost in the haziness of memory and the inaccessibility of ffnet. i tried to dig it up last night but couldn’t find it again 😔

12) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

i don’t ... think so? my current roommate and i tried co-writing when we were teenagers but none of that got published. it’s possible i’m forgetting something from my livejournal/early tumblr days because i remember doing a lot of ask games and challenges with other writers and fandom friends

now i’m just an introvert who avoids invites to discords because i feel like i simply Do Not Have Time so 🤡 not sure it’s anywhere on the horizon

13) What’s your all time favourite ship?

i used to have shipping walls and pairing lists until 2015 or so but i have since accepted that i am changeable like the wind. my interests come and go!

i am a multi-shipper though as a general rule. i’ve never had such a loyalty to a pairing that it would bother me to pair one half with someone else, and i also don’t care at all whether or not a ship is canon. it’s just about what’s interesting!

14) What’s a WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

i’ve had remarkably sequential focus for my critrole fics and finished nearly every idea i’ve had so far. however, this ACME AU is testing me lol and i’ve spent so much time on it that my list of other ideas to write is only getting longer and longer. nothing is abandoned yet, because not much else has even been started, but i am starting to sweat a little

15) What are your writing strengths?

i love my writing style! i value simplicity and clarity: no flowery descriptions, easy words, few similes, little variance in sentence structures, etc. it can vary, based on my mood or the characters i’m writing, but i like doing more with less

i’ve spent years working at my own style and it is so satisfying to read something i wrote in 2011 and feel how familiar it still is while being able to pick out what i would change

16) What are your writing weaknesses?

recently, it’s been plot. if it can’t be conveyed by 2-4 characters talking to each other then i don’t know how to do it anymore 😭 i’m most invested in emotional resolutions, but it’s probably a good idea to have things happen sometimes!

17) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

i really do not enjoy this when it’s used as a “character quirk”. this includes nicknames, common phrases even if they are spoken that way in canon, and .. everything, really, that’s in a different language

i’ve spent a lot of time in spaces where it seemed widely agreed that doing so was not welcome, and i’ve had considerable fandom “culture shock” reading critrole fics. there are plenty of reasons to have caleb speaking “zemnian” or to emphasize his accent, and those reasons don’t need to be lofty or deep, but i do think there should be a reason beyond “haha this guy says ja instead of yeah”

i promise, absolutely pinky swear, that i don’t judge anyone on an individual basis for doing this. it seems to be a deep-seated fandom trend in this case and i just wish it wasn’t

18) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

tsubasa reservoir chronicle (trc) all the way back in 2010. tsubasa, my beloved, how you changed my life 💕

19) What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

i like different ones for different reasons, but the top contender might be such is the endlessness for nier automata. it’s a vampire/werewolf enemies-to-lovers fusion AU where i put 2b and 9s in an original universe of mine that i wrote about a lot when i was a teenager

i feel like i did a spectacular job of adapting the universe for nier and i thought i conveyed a lot about the world in a relatively short number of words (the entire fic is just under 5k). i’ve considered more than once that i should use this version of the universe going forward because i enjoy it so much!

thanks again for the tag, sky, and i’ll leave this open to anyone else who wants to try as i think most of my mutuals have already been included. don’t be shy about tagging me in your answer if you take my open invite as i love reading these! 💖

#my posts #writing blogging #replies

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thatoneitaliangirl · 4 years

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Obey Me! Soulmate AU Asmodeus

Asmodeus’s chapter was the whole reason I even started this whole series. I had the idea for his in my head and was like, “I can’t write one and not the others.” lol. Of course, it took me forever to get this part out because of personal reasons, but in the end, I think it came out pretty good! I hope you guys like this part and I look forward to hearing your responses!~ And just as a reminder, these are all going to be multiple parts each, so if it seems like it left off at a cliff hanger, it did lol. Also, there's a song mentioned in here called Sandra Dee, and its a song from the musical Grease. You don’t have to know the song or the tune since its just a little thing, but if you want to hear it, please check it out! Its a fun song to bop too lol.

Opening Paragraph

Asmodeus was fine with how his life was going. Party all the time, all the men and women he could want; there wasn't a thing he was missing. But even so, he was probably the most eager of his siblings to find their soulmates. He could only imagine what they would be like!

Stunningly beautiful, very well experienced, willing to do . . . All sorts of naughty things. His mouth was practically salivating at the twisted little fantasies going through his head. And even though he doesn't think he's very capable of love, he doesn't care!

I mean, the one night stands are fine and all, but who was he to complain if he were to come home from a night of partying to a nice piece of ass willing to grant him his second wind. Well, this is Asmo we're talking about, so more like his eighth wind. But all the money, sex, drugs, and nightclubs in the Devildom could not have prepared him for this . . .

Taking the glittering key from his 'older' brother, Asmodeus smiles and places the key into the hole . . . Only to imagine a school setting. Unlike where they had found their adorable exchange student, this school was smaller in size, with only one building.

Entering through the door, Asmodeus smirks. Of course, his s/o would be prowling around a college campus! This is where most sex and partying goes on in the human world. "Maybe they're a lab rat!" Levi says, lolol-ing afterward. "Or like some smart know-it-all like Satan!" Mammon joins. Clearly, the two think they're funny.

"And what does that matter to you? I always wanted a sexy scientist." The brothers blush and try to rephrase themselves. Imagine that! They thought they could fluster Asmo? How long have they been brothers? Even back in the Celestial Realm, their comments were never able to bother him.

And a few millennia of being a hoe, you learn to ignore others' opinions of you. It's not as if he's ashamed of it; he's the Avatar of Lust for fuck's sake! It's just that, deep down, he has those little insecurities. The ones that tell him he's not worthy of love.

That his reputation makes him disgusting, unappealing, and dirty. He's been able to push those way down into the depths of the Devildom, but all this has made them resurface. A little bit.

"I wonder what they're wearing? Maybe a little cleavage? Oh, I hope so!~" As the brothers follow Asmo through the school, they all have the feeling things aren't going to go the way Asmo thinks they are. Lucifer especially isn't too confidant there's a human or being out there that could satisfy the pure lust Asmo has.

Though it's not shown often, these sins are like a curse to the brothers. Similar to Beel not being able to stop the hunger, Asmo can't stop the lust. And despite all the shit they give Mammon, they know he can't stop the greed. Though for some of them, they've been able to push it down and control it, a few of them physically can't survive without their sin.

Again, Beel is a perfect example. This poor human is going to have to spend their life attempting to satisfy every need of Asmo's. "I think a left here . . . Oh! This door feels right!~" With dramatic flair, Asmodeus opens the door.

Hello! Welcome to the Wetbord College Art room! How can we help you?" A girl with long blond hair and sparkling eyes greets the boys. One look at her and Asmo can tell that she's not the one. Not that she's not attractive. Any normal day, he would have her charmed, naked, and on his bed in a matter of seconds. With nimble fingers, Asmo lifts the girl's hand into his and kisses the top.

"Hello, darling. We're looking for a girl, about your age," She giggles and smirks. "If that's how you pick up girls, then I'd hate to see your track record. Though, with a little more smooth talk, you may have my attention."

Asmo smirks, hiding his irritation. As if he would ever have to try. If he really wanted to, he could have her begging for him to fuck her while he held her by that pretty blond hair of hers, but this is not the time, nor place. "Actually, I'm serious. Her name is _____, I believe." Her smirk drops as Asmo lets go of her hand, and she pouts.

"Fine, if you really want to know where she is, she'll be here in a few minutes." A blue-haired girl wearing a pair of sorts and a paint-covered apron joins the conversation and puts in her two cents. "If you don't mind me asking, why do you want to see _____?" Asmodeus smiles and puts a hand on his hip.

"If you really want to know, darling, I'm going to fulfill her every sexual desire tonight. Wanna join?~" His eyes glow with anticipation. Obviously, these girls have the hots for him; who wouldn't? He's absolutely gorgeous and- His smile turns to a frown as the two girls begin to laugh loudly. One even has tears falling from her eyes as the other clutches her stomach.

"Sexual desires? Oh my God, I think I'm gonna pee myself!" The blond one says, hand resting on the blue-haired girl's shoulder. "And why is that such a joke to you? I'm sure she has a reputation." He says with certainty, though he doesn't actually know. He's just assuming based on his own preferences. Was that wrong?

Again, the girls begin laughing, this time whipping the tears from their eyes as they look at the seven brothers, all of whom are confused. "Let's just say, there's a reason everyone around town calls her Sandra Dee." They snicker at the nickname as Asmo raises an eyebrow.

"Who?" The blond one flairs out her skirt and dramatically batts her eyelashes before she begins to sing. "Look at me, I'm Sandra Dee-" Blue puts a hand on her hip and leans on blondy. "Lousy with virginity!~" Blondy holds out her left hand and wiggles her ring finger.

"Won't go to bed till I'm legally wed- I can't! I'm Sandra Dee!~" The two begin laughing again, much to Asmodeus' displeasure. Seriously, they sound like a band of cackling hyenas! "Are you guys making fun of me . . . ?" A meek and soft voice from beside them asks, the figure clutching a sketchbook.

"Oh, please, _____! Don't act as if we're bullying you." "Yeah," Blue buts in. "It's just a cute nickname." _____, face hidden behind her hair, turns around and walks out as the girls giggle to themselves. "Well, it bothers me . . ." Belphegor hears her whisper. It seems he's the only one to hear her since he's the closest to the door.

"Aren't you going to go after her?" Belphie asks Asmo, but stops short when he sees the look on his face . . . He seems shocked for the most part. His eyes are cast downward and his mouth is open just a few centimeters, with his eyebrows furrowed together. The world seems to sway around him as he tries to come to terms with what just happened.

What kind of sick joke was their father playing on them? All his brothers so far had wonderful soulmates with personalities that seemed to fit them perfectly. So then why did Asmodeus have to suffer like this? He's the former Jewel of the Heavens! Doesn't he deserve the best? "Asmodeus?" Lucifer puts a hand on his shoulder, bringing him back to reality. "I think it's best if I go home for now . . ."

#obey me! x reader #obey me! asmodeus x reader #obey me! asmodeus #obey me! lucifer #obey me! mammon #obey me! leviathan #obey me! satan #obey me! beelzebub #obey me! belphegor #soulmate au #soulmate #obey me! soulmate au #obey me! soulmate

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violentviolette · 4 years

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tagged by @angelxcomplex and @infernalhedonist thank u both ur too sweet

Nickname: i have a lot but honestly most ppl just call me my name lol its short enough

Gender: nb trans man

Starsign: pisces sun, cancer mood, sag rising

Height: 5′2

Time: like 5pm ish

Birthday: feb 24th

Favorite Bands: the used, p!atd, atreyu, a7x, so so many others lol

Favorite Single Artists: hozier, halsey, au/ra, janelle monae

Song Stuck In My Head: nothing cause im currently listening to music but jesus of suburbia by green day is whats playing rn

Last Movie: repo! the genetic opera because what else do u do on halloween when ur 30 and theres a global pandemic than sit on discord with ur friends and watch people be violently dismembered in a goth opera thats so 2000s it would be painful if it didnt absolutely fuck so hard

Last Show: kipo!! go watch kipo!! its so good and wholesome. definitly a feel good palette cleanser if ur just looking for something thats easy fun

When Did I Create This Blog: oof. like 2011?? i think?? will introduced me to tumblr in college so u have aer to thank for this lol

What do I post: whatever my dysfunctional little brain wants to that day

Last Thing I Googled: genshin impact elements because ziv and i couldnt remember if anemo was the wind element because were just dumb gays lmfaoo

Other blogs:

@violetteviolence <- main blog

@thesirenofbelial <- aestetic blog

@kingkacchan <- boku no hero academia blog

@cardiaccannibal <- porn blog that i cant link cause tumblr has me in horny purgatory. 21+ only, children and ryo do not interact

Do I get asks: i do! u guys are like highkey always really good about sending me stuff and i greatly appreciate it lol i do not deserve the attention yall give me but my npd’s gonna swim in it like scrooge mcduck anyway

Why I Chose My URL: im an absolute slut for alliteration, and since my main is violetteviolence i wanted this to match it and keep the same vibe. when i say my entire life is about aesthetics im not kidding lol

Following: 700 and change lol but i haven’t purged them in a while at least 200 of those blogs are def inactive

Followers: 2.3k

Average Length In Sleep: 5 is the best and what i get when im level but if im manic its 2 and if im depressed its like 12+

Lucky Number: 14

What Am I Wearing: black sweatpants and a tank which like if i was a cartoon character this would absolutely be my 1 outfit lol no socks tho that parts important

Instruments: i used to be able to play the flute but then i decided to stick a bunch of metal into my mouth and now i cant anymore lol

Dream Job: absolutely fucking nothing. leave me alone

Dream Trip: literally anywhere. i love to go places and see new stuff and im equally as enthusiastic about all of it. except france. fuck france

Favorite Food: salmon sushi comes in pretty high on the list tbh

Nationality: unfortunately american

Favorite Song: i can never pick favorites of all time so the song ive been listening to the most recenty is in all my dreams i drown from the devils carnival. also neverland by ruth b and crush by tessa violet. no one make fun of me for how transparent that last one is i will skin u

Last Book Read: oh i could not tell u. genuinely. i read fic all the time so if im reading its one of those. im curently obsessed with this ongoing bakushin hurt/comfort fic that is so good and juicy and it puts out chapters weekly and when i tell u ive been more excited for these updates than the actual fucking manga lmfaoo

Top Three Fictional Universes: ghibli, kingdom hearts, soul eater

not tagging 20 people cause thats Too Many but @captainkiwitheboobian @lmitations @abyssalsun @coffin-bird @retrospecter @therobinair @donkerkonger @twerkingyaowang and @jigokuzoshi i know u dont sully ur prestine blog with such things as tag games but idc i miss u so ur getting the ping

#jack.speaks #long post #thanks again for the tag i love that u guys think of me for these things

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hiirunakaarchive · 5 years

Text

– to act in haste (2)

↳ in an alternate universe where mc landed the fellowship, but not in the way she wanted. (pt 1), (pt 3), (pt 4)

◇ pairing: ethan ramsey x mc (haruna sakurai)

◇ genre: angst, like totally angst. through and through. not a single sentence of redeeming fluff here im so sorry

◇ song rec: comme au premier jour – andré gagnon

◇ word count: 3.2k+

◇ tags: @aworldoffandoms, @perriewinklenerdie (thank u so much for waiting)

◇ author’s note: hi all! it’s been a minute! the release of OH2 finally inspired me to continue the piece that i posted last april so after a week of writing and rewriting im finally satisfied enough to post the second part! (this series is literally my baby please dont let it flop). i decided that this story will be split into three parts so i strongly suggest reading pt1 linked above if you want to make any sense of this second part LOL. pls keep in mind that i wrote part one before OH1 finished so it’s not totally faithful to the original story and has my own little spin of drama and flair so like always, feedback is always appreciated!! ill shut up now, ENJOY!

prologue

Dr. Sakurai was his epitome of a dream. Temporary, fleeting bliss that left just as soon as it came.

The two months following their confrontation were painfully, excruciatingly silent. She avoided him like the plague and the circumstances failed to change during the nine weeks he spent in the Amazon. He departed with the intent of banishing her and whatever feelings that still lingered from his heart and mind, yet one look at her was all it took for his resolve to crack.

He still loved her.

arrival

The first night marking Dr. Ramsey’s arrival back in Boston, the view of the bustling city from his airplane window evoked a flurry of fond memories. He had missed the city more than he cared to admit, yet, he had come to hate it just the same.

As the plane landed and rolled against the tarmac, Ethan stared vacantly at the distant lights of the city and let his thoughts wander.

Has she been taking care of herself?

Is she still angry with me?

Does she look any different from when I last saw her?

He let out a huff of frustration and accepted the bitter truth. Two months of cowardice and deliberately running from the thought of her did nothing to ease the sting of reality amidst his return to America.

Leaning back against the headrest, he muttered. “I need a drink.”

The next two hours passed in a blur. The doctor disembarked the aircraft in a hurry and retrieved his luggage from the carousel just as quick. Amongst that and hopping into the first cab he could hail, Ethan was unsure whether his haste was just in desperation to get home and rest or to quench his thirst for the god damn drink that airplane liquor couldn’t satisfy.

He stumbled into his apartment and let Jenner out of the carrier, the pet becoming nothing but an obscure whiz of fur as he zipped out of the cage to celebrate the comfort and familiarity of their home.

The kitchen was still pristine, though not without a bit of dust. Looming over the marble counters and to the dining table across the room, Ethan found himself reminiscing over the last meal he had here.

“The fellowship. Why did I win?”

“Did you think it would make me happy?”

“Is that it, Ethan? Do you pity me?”

“Christ.” He cursed to himself, ripping open the cupboards.

A single bottle of red wine greeted him, still three quarters full and untouched since the last disastrous dinner he had with Dr. Sakurai. It seemed to splash delightfully against its bottle as the man rolled his eyes and filled the glass to the brim. Inhaling the aroma and swirling the liquid with a delicate motion of his wrist, he took a sip.

This tastes like shit.

Ethan poured the wine down the sink along with the remaining contents of the bottle, bidding goodbye to the last physical remnant of that tear-ridden night two months ago.

He still needed a damn drink though.

The first step he took into Donahue’s was a hopeful one, and he cursed to himself in disappointment for knowing exactly what, or more specifically, who he was hoping to see.

He quickly scanned the booths and bar, failing in the search for that recognizable head of vibrant red and black. The only vibrance he was getting was from the familiar disco ball that loomed overhead, which made him squint in distaste. Taking a seat at the bar, a voice he could only recognize as Reggie’s called to him from behind the counter, his back to him.

“Welcome, I’ll be right with you.” He said, not bothering to turn around.

“I thought I told you to get rid of that god awful toy on the ceiling.”

Reggie’s head snapped up.

“Two months of disappearing off the face of the earth did nothing to fix that attitude of yours, Ramsey.” He smiled at his regular warmly before grabbing a bottle of scotch and pouring a glass.

Reggie slid it to him across the table.

“On me. Welcome back.”

Taking it gratefully, Ethan rose it to the bartender in a toast for his generosity.

“Thank you, Reg.” He said, stepping off the stool and making his way towards his favourite spot on the patio.

Midway through the exit, the doctor’s annoyance was already stirred by the booming voices and clinking of glass from an unknown group. They were counting down, and to what, exactly? He could not, for the life of him, be bothered.

And then he heard it.

“Midnight!”

Her voice.

“To kicking ass and running Edenbrook-“

Oh God, no.

“— as second-year residents!”

Ethan stopped fully in his tracks, and the eyes that solely wandered the deck in search of a free table landed on a picnic bench where five very familiar faces smiled and laughed.

Dr. Trinh, Dr. Greene, Dr. Lahela—

He exhaled in relief as he spotted Dr. Varma.

So they’ve gone back to being friends.

And smack in the middle, Dr. Sakurai.

Haruna Sakurai.

Fairy lights that illuminated the patio in protest to the evening were strung between poles and trees erected around the terrace. Yet amongst it all, Dr. Ramsey still found her to be shining the brightest. She still had that proper and dignified air about her, and the man was relieved to see that she had begun to smile again, albeit not as merrily as she used too. He could tell that in the several months they haven’t spoken to each other that she was no longer the same wide-eyed, inquisitive doctor she once was.

I solved the case!

I figured out a way to help some people who really deserve it. It’s a good feeling.

What it means to be a doctor? It means fighting the inevitable.

During Dr. Sakurai’s first year at Edenbrook, she had admitted to Dr. Ramsey that she regarded him as her reckoning. Perhaps that was what pushed her to try harder.

“Yeah, you were definitely an asshole, but it was less you that I was scared of, and more ‘This asshole is my greatest inspiration and I can’t disappoint him’.” She rambled on their stroll back to the hospital from Derry Roasters.

He chuckled fondly as he continued to look straight ahead, the corners of his mouth curving up in a ghost of a smile.

“You could never disappoint me.”

She had learned and grown, and Dr. Ramsey was there to witness every budding moment of it. It was then that he realized that she was the one to be reckoned with.

A few tables from Edenbrook’s newest residents, he spotted the bar where he could enjoy his drink alone and in peace. He looked away from the joyous bunch and started towards the empty stools, but not without inevitably passing by the group first. Dr. Greene spotted him, his eyes lighting up in recognition and Ethan sighed in abandonment of any hope of getting to the other side of the beer garden unbothered.

“Speaking of the diagnostics team...” Elijah whispered audibly.

As the others in the group indulged in their gossip about Ethan’s heroic medical mission across the continent, Sakurai tensed visibly. He stopped in front of their table and for the first time in a very long time, she willed herself to look up and make her eyes meet his.

“Rookie...” Ethan greeted her coolly as he broke the silence.

Haruna’s jaw clenched and he questioned his audacity at still daring to call her by her nickname. Perhaps they were both thinking the same thing. How could they address each other– no, even look at each other, knowing that they were going to work together again? Above it all, how could Dr. Sakurai come to the hospital everyday; constantly, ceaselessly interacting with the living reminder that her position on the diagnostics team wasn’t even rightfully hers?

They left things on a horrifically bitter and awkward note, and Haruna’s eyes darted between her friends across the table, begging to be bailed out.

Dr. Trinh shifted uncomfortably, Dr. Lahela took a flippant sip of his beer as he eyed Haruna protectively, and Dr. Varma glared at the attending with eyes ablaze. Dr. Greene seemed to be the only one unbothered by Ethan’s presence.

Haruna breathed in once before plastering on a fake smile.

“It’s good to have you back, Dr. Ramsey.”

The fake sentiment wrenched at his chest, the gaze that once beamed at him with stars and everything bright now replaced with something hollow and resentful. He was careless enough to let the turmoil show on his face momentarily before collecting himself.

“Yeah... good to be back,” Was all he could muster.

Sensing the tension between himself and the five young doctors, Ethan nodded his head once before continuing to the main bar.

“Doctors. Enjoy your night.”

Sakurai’s eyes lingered on him as he walked away, and the holes he felt being burned into his back vanished once he took his very distant seat at the bar. Her friends continued on with their idle chitchat, and Ethan found himself listening intuitively. No amount of distance he placed between himself and that rambunctious group could keep him from overhearing bits and pieces of their conversation.

They cackled and toasted some more, and the strangers around them, be it alone or with company, indulged in their own private celebrations as well. Yet despite the boisterous nature of his surroundings, all he could hear was her.

“I’m a colossal pain in the ass! I don’t want to be responsible for another me!”

And he couldn’t help but laugh.

present

Since that fateful evening two weeks ago, Dr. Ramsey and Dr. Sakurai assumed their normal routine, save for the scowl she tried to hide every time she saw him. Despite the circumstances, he kept a close eye on her as she eased into her place on the diagnostics team, having succeeded in charming Baz with her amiable personality, and June as they made small talk in regards to their common cultural heritage. Sakurai remained quiet and unassuming during her first few days, but she had proven herself to be a quick learner.

“Female, thirty seven, Caucasian.” Ethan began as everyone took their seats.

He uncapped a black marker, scribbling across the board and throwing out answers before the other three had a chance to ask. This was their regular pace, which by now, Dr. Sakurai had grown accustomed to. She certainly looked less bewildered than she did her first day there.

“Reason for admission was pain and numbness in the extremities. Former doctors thought it was...a stroke.” Ethan grimaced and Dr. Mirani snorted.

“What turned up in her bloodwork?” Dr. Hirata asked as she shook her head ruefully. “Did she have a urinalysis done?”

The three experienced doctors proceeded with their swift exchange of ideas, their discussion riddled with numerous ifs, buts, and whys. Dr. Sakurai listened intently and remained silent with her eyes glued to her notebook, almost so silent that Ethan almost questioned if she was even wholly present.

“Negative for multiple sclerosis, but just before she was discharged presented with irritable bowel syndrome.” He continued.

“Could it be fibromyalgia then?” Dr. Sakurai finally suggested, looking up from paper ridden with chicken scratch notes scrawled in red pen.

Baz and June raised their eyebrows in delighted surprise. “Seconded,” and Ethan regarded his protege collectedly.

“I thought so as well. Excellent work, Dr. Sakurai.” To which she merely nodded in response.

Later that day, Ethan found himself strolling down the halls of Edenbrook in Dr. Baz Mirani’s company. He chatted endlessly, recalling the meeting from earlier that morning and shifted the topic of conversation to Dr. Sakurai. Ethan was never one to entertain idle gossip, but when it came to her, he couldn’t bring himself to not listen.

“Did you know that her red hair was a mistake?” Baz cackled.

“She told me that she accidentally booked her hair appointment two hours after her board and came in sleep deprived. Knocked out as she soon as she sat in that chair and woke up with Flaming Cheetos for a head!” The doctor brought a hand up to his chest to ease himself as he laughed.

Ethan stayed silent as his colleague relayed her story. Of course he knew. He knew that she hated her red hair with every fibre of her being, but still complimented the stylist’s work and tipped her generously. He knew that as soon as she got home, she locked herself in her room and cried while trying to convince herself that her new look was symbolic of her “badass-ness.” He knew that she spent the next year using aloe vera in a desperate attempt to grow it out before applying for residency. How could he forget?

“You know, I wasn’t sure what to think of her at first, knowing the whole deal about how she got into the team and all.” Baz conceded and the guilt resurfaced, threatening to swallow Ethan whole.

“Baz, if you’re going to-”

“But she’s really good. Shows a lot of promise. I understand why you did what you did, but I’d be lying if I said I completely agreed with your poor execution.” He finished, shrugging indifferently.

“Ahem.”

A woman’s voice behind them cleared her throat and Baz’s eyes widened in horror as he shot Ethan a quick glance, both men knowing just who exactly had requested their attention. They turned around, and Mirani greeted her with an almost suspicious grade of enthusiasm.

"Dr. Sakurai! You see, this- what I was saying to Eth- no, Dr. Ramsey is that-”

She smiled at him, unbothered.

“You forgot your pager again,” She teased, handing it to him gently before heading the other direction with not another word.

Ethan’s gaze followed her retreating form, pain stricken. He was almost jealous of Baz, even just for a moment. When was the last time Haruna had caught him in a moment of blundering and regarded him lovingly nonetheless? He failed to recall the last time that she flashed him the smile that no one else could bring to her face but him. The kind where the corners of her eyes crinkled and she had to bury her face in her hands because she was too embarrassed to show that face out in the open. It was one of the many things that made him fall in love with her, and continue to love her all the same.

He missed her. More than he could have ever imagined possible.

Dr. Mirani exhaled in relief as she left. “Well! That could have gone a lot worse than I- Dr. Ramsey?”

And, before he realized where his feet had begun to take him, he went after her. He couldn’t let things continue like this. He couldn’t stand it.

“Wait, Rookie-”

The large strides that Ethan took to catch up to Dr. Sakurai in the empty hall were not many. Her steps were small but filled with purpose, and her heels that clacked mercilessly against the slate floor stopped abruptly. She turned to face him, and the second Haruna’s eyes met his, he was only reminded of the newfound hatred ulcerating at her very core.

She raised an eyebrow. “Not a rookie anymore, Doctor.”

The lack of emotion in Dr. Sakurai’s voice as she addressed the man stung. He should be used to this. He should have foreseen this. But one year of knowing and loving her could never have prepared Ethan for her villainously petty demeanor finally directed at him. Two weeks since she said his name in a voice dripping with venom, and she hasn’t dared to utter it since.

Always, “Yes, Doctor,” or, “Noted, Doctor.” It was driving him insane.

“Dr. Ramsey.” He attempted, his tone dribbling with an impatience he didn’t realize had been brewing.

“Doctor.” She challenged.

He looked at her, a muscle in his jaw twitching in annoyance. She looked at him, arms crossed and adamant on winning whatever contest it was that they had engaged in. And they stayed like that, for several seconds until a group of interns passing by and regarding them with curiosity forced them to look away. Dr. Sakurai closed her eyes and exhaled once, gathering herself before maneuvering her way around the older doctor.

“Excuse me.”

He watched her as she side-stepped him, about to continue her journey to her destination if he didn’t gently take her by the wrist and pull her into the medicine supply room. The very same one they hid in when they still kept Naveen a secret.

“W-What are you– Don’t fucking touch me.” Dr. Sakurai hissed once they had entered, jerking her hand from his grip.

“Are you going to be like this every time you see me?” Ethan pinched the bridge of his nose and looked up to the ceiling.

“If we’re being honest? Yeah, yeah I am.”

“I meant it when I said I was sorry.”

“And I meant it when I said sorry wasn’t good enough.”

“Look at yourself, Sakurai.” Ethan scoffed.

“Petty like a child. Did you think your official status as a resident would suffice in masking this juvenile drivel or should I just throw you back in with this year’s batch of interns?”

Haruna stared at him blankly, and just for a moment he felt his chest tighten. Her resentful gaze made him miss the way they once were, and he ached for her to look at him the way she used to, but Ethan’s lamenting was cut short as Sakurai’s mouth twitched. A failed attempt to contain herself before she burst into bitter laughter.

“You can do that, can’t you?” She asked disdainfully.

“Give one of them my position while you’re at it. The same way you gave it to me.”

He took a step toward her and she stayed put, refusing to be intimidated by the man that stood just over six inches taller. Then they were achingly close, the distance between them so small that her shoes were flush against his own. So small that Haruna couldn’t help but inhale the scent of musk and Italian cypress from his cologne. Ethan looked down at her angrily and the younger woman looked back up at him with a fire just as intense.

“You might hate the means of how you got here, Dr. Sakurai, but the deed is done. There’s nothing you can do to change it so I strongly suggest getting over your vendetta against me and doing what you’re supposed to do.”

“Yeah? And what might that be?”

“Your damn job, for one!”

She finally stepped back, struck, and looked at him as if she was seeking clarification.

“My job? My job?!” She asked angrily, her voice raised in a crescendo.

Her jaw hung open as she stared at the floor in disbelief, scoffing as she processed Ethan’s last statement. The second seemed to last far too long before Haruna finally met his gaze. Her lip quivered as she shot him a look of pure, utter disgust.

“I took you for many things, but a hypocrite was never one of them.” She spat and Ethan felt his glare soften in realization.

You came here to fix things, and now look at what you’ve done.

“Rookie-” He began, his tone considerably weaker.

“Don’t. You don’t get to call me that. Not anymore. I’ll see you on the floor, Dr. Ramsey.”

She left, and any hidden meanings to whatever relationship they had departed with her. He was no longer an Ethan Ramsey to her, and she was no longer a Haruna Sakurai to him.

She was just a resident. He was just her boss. And this unpalatable truth broke him.

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