#this could be also considered for the prompt soulmates maybe...

[heesdreamer]

omg the mention of camping in your new heejake fic has me thinking of scenarios in a TENT why am i blushing gn

LOST TIME

PAIRING ➩ heeseung x reader (ex beomgyu x reader mentioned)

SUMMARY ➩ you and your bestfriends, growing up together since you were babies, had a tradition of going camping together every summer. this year you get paired up to share a tent with the boy you’ve been in love with since elementary.

WC ➩ 7.7k

AUTHORS NOTE ➩ honestly this was meant to just be a straight up PWP work due to the request but i got way too into the friendship dynamics and backstory lol.. idk if any other writers relate but sometimes smut just doesn’t feel like it fits in stories but i hope you still like this and maybe ill write something more nsfw later on with this prompt (not proofread and written at like 6am like always lol)

It wasn’t like camping was something you absolutely hated. In fact, for the first 20 years of your life it had been the single thing you looked forward to most throughout the busy year.

At some point it had developed into a promised tradition, an accidental hobby that you and your friend’s coincidentally carried on all throughout your shared childhood and high school.

Your parents had all grown up together too and lived on the same street once they were old enough to start their own families, keeping their tight knit connections and extending it to their partners and children later on in life. You grew up with a community because of this, your neighbors being people you’d spent your entire life around as they were basically family now.

It wasn’t a surprise to any of your parents and their friends families when they all also had kids around the same time, the biggest gap between babies being just over 4 years.

This was how your best friends came to be, as smooth and naturally as gaining a sibling or meeting a soulmate. You grew up surrounded with the same kids, going to the same school and spending holidays together at one of the houses on the shared culdesac.

The camping tradition was started before you even could register what was happening, photos of your parents lined up in bathing suits, holding different sized babies down near the lake shore with bright smiles and sunburns were your only proof that you’d been there as long as you have. As you got older and could enjoy the activities more, it became your favorite thing to do.

Your parents all got older right alongside you and they eventually stopped coming with, knowing you and the other kids would have fun out there while also being safe and smart.

So you continued on like that, all pitching up tents for the weekend and spending your time relaxing on tubes in the river or talking around the campfire, letting off the stress the year had brought you as you finished up high school and entered different colleges.

So it was slightly out of character that you were groaning as you packed your suitcase, complaining to Sunoo on the other side of the phone as he carried out the same action a few houses down.

“It’s just terrible timing.” Your voice was louder than normal as you disappeared into your closet in search of something warm for the colder temperatures at night. “Beomgyu and I are barely even broken up and I’m so behind on class work I could die.”

“Well you know it’s the same time every year Y/N, it’s not like it was sprung on you. Plus Beomgyu broke up with you last fall. I’d say you’re officially over by now.” Sunoo’s voice was barely audible from back in your bedroom but you still sighed and leaned your head onto your dressed with a thud.

He was always brutally honest with you considering he’d known you since you were infants, being the two closest in age out of the rest of you. When you first started school most of the teachers had assumed you were twins, wearing matching clothes and stuck at the hip everywhere you went.

You’d ditched The Shining like fashion now that you were adults but you still were the closest to him out of everybody, having applied to the same college together.

“Plus we haven’t seen the others since the holidays. This is the longest we’ve been apart, aren’t you excited?” His voice was picking up a hopeful tone as he tried to cheer you up and change your mood around.

You sighed softly again and walked back to your bedroom, grabbing your phone from the bed and holding it to your ear so you could hear him better. Leaning forward to look out your window across the small chunk of yard that separated you from your neighbor, you could see him sitting in his chair with a big smile on his face.

“You’ll be sick of them in an hour.” You remarked and knocked on the window, his head picking up to look over at you.

“I’m always sick of them.” He was rolling his eyes and you watched his mouth move in silence as the phone audio lagged behind a few seconds. “That’s the best part.”

You smiled at that and nodded although he wasn’t looking at you anymore, turning back to his bag. You did miss your other friends, almost an impossible amount.

You spent a lot of nights in your dorm room thinking about them and how horrible it was to be apart, replaying the goodbyes you all gave each other at the airport over and over in your mind as you tried to remain hopeful for the next time you could reunite. Nothing could prepare you for how difficult it was to separate for them, your parents all watching you with sad smiles in the background as you cried and hugged each other.

Coming home for Christmas felt like you’d gained a piece of your heart back, spending the entire break inseparable and having more fun than you possibly could with the more casual friends you’d met in school.

Your parents hadn’t nagged you for not being home a lot or felt sad that you all rather be together than with them for Christmas Eve and morning, understanding more than anybody else what it felt like to have such friendships.

“Aren’t you excited to see Heeseung?” Sunoo’s voice cut into your happy daydreams and the smile fell from your face at his teasing tone, stiffening slightly as he glanced at you from his room again, an eyebrow raised in amusement at your reaction.

“I’m excited to see everybody.” You said stiffly and he let out a small laugh at your sudden serious tone, knowing you had caught on to what he was implying. “Sunoo, don’t make it weird.”

“I’m not.” He gasped like it was an offensive thing to suggest, standing and approaching the window so you could see him better as he continued to tease you. “I just think it might be interesting considering this is the first time you’ve seen your childhood lover since being single again.”

“Do not call him that.” You were groaning and flopping back on your bed to which he let out another amused laugh.

You loved all of your friends equally, each one of them bringing a different set of pros to your life and helping to shape your personality as you grew up and molded into the person you were now. They were your family, brothers you never had and they felt the same way about you, resulting in no one ever dating within the group or causing awkward moments that could potentially upset the harmonious balance.

Lee Heeseung was the exception.

Despite Sunoo’s ridiculous phrasing he had never been your lover, not even remotely coming close to it. In fact things were almost more platonic with him than anybody else, never hugging you for too long or jokingly flirting to try and get on your nerves.

You weren’t exactly sure what it was about Heeseung that you liked so much. You’d seen him grow up the same as the other boys and while their changes annoyed you, scrunching your nose at classic boyish humor or lack of hygiene as they all shot up in height and their voices started cracking, Heeseung was the most beautiful person you’d ever met in your entire life.

He’d been born first out of all the babies but he never took advantage of being the eldest, always kind and generous as he drove everybody around and asked for group opinions instead of just doing whatever he wanted out of seniority.

He was funny in a way you didn’t know boys could be funny, not even meaning to make you laugh sometimes and just coincidentally being a beacon of light and humor that left all of you bending over trying to catch your breath at the dinner table. You liked this about him but you liked the small proud smile he’d have after everytime even more.

It certainly didn’t help that he was handsome in an unreal way. He had seemingly barely dipped a toe in the awkward phase you all went through before he was shooting up in height and his features were sharpening, solidifying into somebody who could’ve been intimidating if he wasn’t always smiling and goofing around.

But Heeseung was never your lover and he never would be considering your crush for him, that you had mistakenly spilled to Sunoo at some point during your senior year of high school, was completely dead and gone as far as you were concerned.

You’d even gotten a boyfriend to prove this to yourself, meeting a sophomore on your first day of college and immediately being taken by his style and humor. He reminded you of your friends back home as much as somebody could manage and he helped you adjust to being away from everyone outside of Sunoo. You’d even brought him back home with you last thanksgiving, letting him meet your friends before he abruptly dumped you on your drive back to the airport.

When you’d gotten out of the car with swollen eyes and red cheeks, your friends who had been waiting in the lobby to say the round of goodbyes had immediately crowded around you in worry.

Heeseung was standing back a bit and you tried not to make eye contact with him, humiliated as you murmured to them that Beomgyu had just broken up with you only a few minutes ago.

Jay was furious and attempting to go and confront the boy who was checking your bags in with security but Jungwon was quickly reminding him that you had to spend the next 4 hours sat right beside him on the cramped plane and they didn’t need to make the silence anymore uncomfortable than it already was going to be.

“I can drive you back.” Heeseung’s soft voice was coming from behind the bickering pair and you glanced up at him with wide teary eyes, not liking the pitiful gaze he was peering down at you with.

You felt sick at his suggestion as your heart skipped a few beats, the harsh reminder of how kind and generous he was immediately followed by the realization that no matter how hard your tried or how long of a relationship you had, he’d still make your stomach light up with butterflies. You turned down his offer and said your goodbyes with more tears than usual, promising to see them soon.

Heeseung hadn’t come to Christmas for the first time in your lives and as much fun as you had seeing each other again, the balance was always off whenever one of you weren’t present. He’d claimed he was busy with work and that he’d tried to get time off but he simply couldn’t, a message in the group chat about how he couldn’t wait to go camping being the last time you’d heard from him.

By the time Sunoo spoke again you could see him throwing his backpack over his shoulder and wheeling his suitcase out the door. “This could be the year you know. You should make a move.”

“Don’t be stupid.” You shook your head although he couldn’t see you anymore. “There is no move to be made, we’re bestfriends.”

“That’s because you- Hi Mrs L/N.” You could hear your front door open both through the phone speaker and your own ears. “Are too pussy to do anything about it.”

He whispered the last part so your mom wouldn’t hear and you laughed at the way he stopped mid insult to greet her with an affectionate tone. You hung up the phone and laid flat on your back as you waited for him to climb the stairs to your room.

He was pushing the door open only seconds later and he paused in the doorway when he saw you pathetically sprawled out in your own self pity, sighing softly before climbing on the bed besides your head and petting your hair gently as he kissed his teeth.

“Poor thing. In love with the village idiot.” He was shaking his head and you shoved his hand off of you as he let out a laugh, shielding himself from your attacks. You were sitting up to push him again when three long honks were ringing from outside, catching both of your attention.

You were off the bed and grabbing your bags before you could say another word, a childlike excitement washing over you as you giddily ran down the stairs and gave your mom a rushed kiss goodbye as she complained about the fact Jay had honked and didn’t come in to say hello.

By the time you got outside the other boys were already out of the car, meeting you halfway in laughed filled hugs and you and Sunoo ran to embrace them.

“Oh my god, when did you get so tall?” You were pulling away from Riki in exclamation as you held his arms and shook his frame slightly, scanning him all the way up to his face that was now having to look down at you. “What are they feeding you over there?”

“Straight protein.” Jake was answering before the youngest could, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and he also admired Riki’s growth spurt, although slightly envious considering he hadn’t grown much since high school.

“Protein won’t make you grow idiot.” Sunghoon was leaning against the van with a judging expression as he looked at his friend and roommate, him and Jake going to the same school about an hour away.

You’d stayed in pairs or groups for the most part since moving out. Sunoo and you, Jake and Sunghoon and then Jay, Jungwon and Riki had all moved in together at the best school in the state neighboring yours.

Heeseung was the only one who hadn’t applied alongside any of you despite the belief you all were going to try and stay together as much as possible while still supporting your individual dreams and wants. He had applied to all the same schools as you all did, getting accepted into every single one. Yet when it came down to choosing, he moved the furthest away on his own.

When he had sat you all down in Jungwon’s basement to announce this you remember feeling betrayed. Hurt at him leaving and even more upset that he hadn’t picked the school you were attending considering that was the option he seemed to be leaning towards according to what he told you

You can recall the others cheering in celebration at the fact he’d gotten into an extremely good college despite the sadness that settled in on everyone’s faces when they realized what that meant. You caught his eye at some point during that exchange and he flinched away, not wanting to look at you the same way you did to him at the airport.

Not similarly to the way he was looking at you now, rounding the front of the van as he got out of the passenger seat and made his way to where you were all gathered.

You tensed up for a moment when you first saw him and Riki noticed, following your gaze over his shoulder as he turned around and smiled once he saw what you were looking at, walking over to Heeseung and dragging him towards you with a pat on the back.

“Hey.” He was breathing out as he looked down at you and you took a second to take in his appearance.

It hadn’t been that long since you’d seen him but somehow he looked different, or maybe he just felt different considering how much broader his shoulders were and how much more sure of himself he seemed. You weren’t exactly sure what it was about him that was striking you as new but you were momentarily stunned as you took him in.

Sunoo was nudging you with him elbow suddenly and you realized you’d been completely zoned out checking Heeseung out as you ignored his greeting. “Hi Hee.”

He smiled down at you softly but didn’t say anything else, just standing there for a second before Jay was smacking the hood of the old van and announcing you had to hit the road or else you’d miss the site check in time. You gave him a quick glance before moving to carry your bags into the trunk, stopping when big hands were overlapping yours on the handle.

“Let me do it.” You looked up from under your eyelashes to see Heeseung bending over slightly as he gathered your stuff for you.

You were too stunned to say anything and he smiled again, fuller this time as he turned with your stuff and started to load it up. Sunoo was chuckling from beside you and you whipped your head to the side to shoot him a glare, a silent warning for him to be quiet and not draw attention to the blush on your face or the fact your stomach was lighting up with the same familiar feeling it always did whenever you were around the oldest boy.

The ride was uneventful for the most part, three hours passing as the boys in front of you caught up and told childish jokes, at one point having a competition to see who could catch the most goldfish in their mouth before they were gagging.

Heeseung hadn’t joined in with them from his seat in front of you but you could see his cheeks rising with a smile every time Sunoo squeaked out a laugh or Riki started to tease Jay who was driving. You and Sunghoon were in the back, playing games on his phone as you passed it back and forth and tried to ignore the eyes you could feel looking back at you every once in a while.

You were all just starting to reach your boredom limit and the car was filling with groans of pain as you stretched your legs out onto others and complained about your back pain, when you finally were pulling up to the familiar area.

As you shuffled out of the van, you took a deep breath and squeezed your eyes shut. It was rare to find this type of visual anywhere you were used to, the large trees surrounding the clear lake with small mountains out in the distance.

The air felt clear and light in your lungs and the temperature was perfect, just hot enough that you could go swimming still but also bundle into a sweater to avoid getting an overwhelming amount of bug bites.

You helped unload the trunk with the others, setting up the grills and coolers in a small area a few feet away from the main camp site. It was empty now, a small lot of perfectly mowed grass but you’d seen the process enough times to know with only a little bit of work, it could turn into a comfortable home for you to spend the weekend. Jake helped you moved some of the heavier stuff, giggling when he almost tripped over a branch walking backwards.

“Here comes the worst part.” He was leaning over to whisper to you as you walked back to camp.

Jay was sitting on the picnic table the campsite offered to people who stayed multiple nights, the hat he had been wearing in his hands as Sunoo ripped up little pieces of paper next to him.

Jake was right in the sense that this was the most meticulous part of the weekend but you never completely minded it. Your names would all be written on a piece of paper and put into the hat, then you’d draw two at a time and be given your tent roommate for the trip. Sunghoon and Jake often got paired and he’s complain the entire time, citing him as a blanket hog.

For 90% of the years you’d done this tradition you’d gotten Sunoo, eventually you imagined it had something to do with the fact he was the one who always got to call out the names being pulled.

Nobody ever called him out for it despite the way they’d roll their eyes as he put on a show of surprise, gasping and covering his mouth in shock and you laughed and cheered him on. So you weren’t thinking too much about the mischievous look on his face, figuring he was just planning out how his performance was going to go this time around.

“Okay first up to bat.” Jay was calling out in a serious tone, shuffling the slips around now that they were all accounted for.

“Jake.” Sunoo was announcing as he pulled the first one out, unfolding it and showcasing it slowly to your eager eyes. Jake nudged your side with an excited look on his face, crossing his fingers and squeezing his eyes shut in anticipation. “And…. Sunghoon!”

“Oh no fucking way.” The boy next to you was groaning loudly as he dropped to his knees dramatically, holding his head and trying to block out the sounds of Sunghoon laughing and cheering as he mocked him.

You laughed with him, looking at Sunoo who winked at you and bunched the papers up in his hands. You bent down to wrap your arms under Jake’s arms, tugging him back up to a standing position as he dramatically leaned against you.

Sunghoon was excitedly skipping over to the two of you, face lit up with pleasure at the sound of his friends complaints. He helped you hold up Jake who had gone completely limp as he feigned death. “Hurry up, he’s heavy.”

“Alright next up is…” Sunoo paused dramatically like he was waiting for a drum roll, sighing and muttering how you guys weren’t any fun when nobody humored him. “Jungwon and Sunoo.”

Jungwon let out a cheer and a swift clap, although not moving from where he was lounging in a camping chair beside the picnic table. Sunoo gave you another look, the same mischievous grin on his face that he had before, although now it made your blood run cold as you quickly realized what he was attempting to do.

“Riki and Jay.” You were proven right as the third pair was announced and you stiffened up completely in shock and betrayal, not even paying attention to the two boys and they agreed they were going to get the best and biggest tent since Riki was the tallest.

“Looks like it’s me and you.” To make your situation worse, Heeseung’s low voice was suddenly hitting your ear and you turned to glance at him.

He looked slightly awkward, not nearly as awkward as you were feeling, and you felt a wave a guilt at the fact he had most likely saw your upset reaction. You hoped he just figured it was because you liked to be close with Sunoo, although right now you were considering drowning him in the lake, and didn’t think it had anything to do with him.

“Looks like it.” You gave him a tensed smile knowing it absolutely everything to do with him.

——

The day was so fun you were almost able to forget your unfortunate sleeping situation. Everybody had gone down to the lake the second the tents were properly set up and secured into the ground, greeting familiar campers who lived on site full time during the summers and splashing each other aggressively until somebody was screaming and blowing water out of their nose.

It exhausted you fast and you were back at the camp only a few hours later so you could conserve your energy, watching Jay and thanking him as he grilled enough meat for all of you to eat multiple servings.

Now the sun had set and your first night was coming to an end in the most peaceful way possible, listening to your best friends have low voiced talks around a crackling campfire. You weren’t saying much but you liked to hear them tell stories about their months apart from you and drink in their voices that you had missed so dearly.

“Shit just changes in college.” Riki was mumbling and you watched him with tired eyes, nodding your head as he spoke about how he’s felt slightly out of place now that he was away from home.

“That’s because everybody is either having sex or trying to.” Jake was remarking from beside you and you turned to glare at him.

He was playing with the dangling netted cup holder of your foldable chair and you slapped his hand away at his statement, causing him to chuckle and nudge you with his foot as he shrugged. “Hey, it’s true.”

“Not for everybody.” Sunghoon was shaking his head and giving him the same grossed out look you were. He was sat across from you and he glanced at you from behind the fire with a nod of agreement. “Some of us have better stuff to do than go to parties every weekend and dick off.”

Jake was scoffing in disbelief and you watched Sunghoon shoot him a pointed look like he was telling him to keep quiet, your mouth dropping into a surprised laugh at the fact he had tried to lie and pretend to agree with you.

“Don’t let her fool you, she complains about her virginity every other day.” Sunoo was casually saying as he took a sip of his drink, his head tilting back to finish it and missing the reaction from the group.

It had fallen completely silent and you stiffened up awkwardly in your chair, a wave of embarrassment washing over you at your friends blunt phrasing. He had always been known to tell the truth about anything and everything but he seemed to realize this was too far, even for him, putting his cup down slowly and offering you an apologetic grimace.

“What?” Jake was sitting up in his chair and turning to fully face you, leaning forward and tugging on your sleeve with an urgent look on his face. “You’ve never had sex?”

“Dude you were with Beomgyu for like 3 years.” Jungwon was muttering from a few spots over and you glared in his direction at the mention of your ex boyfriend.

“Eight months.” The voice from the other seat beside you was speaking for the first time in a while and you turned your gaze slowly to see Heeseung stiff in his chair, staring into the fire as he played with his empty cup absentmindedly. You wondered if he even realized he had said something, let alone suddenly announced the exact amount of time you’d been in a relationship.

“Regardless dude, weren’t you guys like super serious?” Riki was adding on and you looked over to him, happy no one else had realized how weird what Heeseung had said was.

Despite how open you all were with each other, it was rare the conversation about sex lives ever extended over to you. As much as you didn’t really mind the idea of talking to them about your experiences, or lack there of, you also weren’t totally oppose to them never asking and you never telling.

You would’ve laughed at the fact they all looked personally offended you hadn’t gotten laid, maybe even joined in on the banter, if it wasn’t for the boy next to you and how embarrassing it was for him to be hearing it all. As much as you wished you thought of Heeseung the same as the other boys, you didn’t and this proved it.

“It’s not a big deal guys… he never tried or anything. I didn’t think much about it.” You were flushed bright red, thankfully hidden underneath the dark night, and shaking your head as you tried to feign casualness.

“Not a big deal?” Jake was laughing in disbelief and leaning forward more so you’d fully understand the sincerity in his words. “He was with YOU for almost a year and never made a move? He’s crazy.”

You were turning to glare at him at his wording and he leaned back a few inches, keeping a hand on your chair.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” You groaned as you realized this wasn’t something they were going to just let go and move on from, being presented with the most interesting conversation point of the night.

“You’re hot.” He said it like it was something obvious and clear and you faltered in shock, mouth parting and you leaned forward to smack him on the shoulder. He winced and flinched away from you with an upset whine. “I’m just saying dude! We all think it.”

You turned away from him to scan the rest of the circle with wide eyes and furrowed eyebrows, watching the other boys awkwardly avoid your gaze or just outwardly nod their heads in agreement with Jake. (Sunghoon and Jay.)

You weren’t stupid and you knew the boys were attractive, each of them fit and handsome constantly drawing attention all throughout high school, subjecting you to glares from girls in the hallways and boys trying to befriend you in an attempt to get closer to them.

Still, you’d never considered the fact that they thought about you in a similar way. You never thought too deeply into your own appearance at all, both positively and negatively but you figured the idea would never cross their minds considering they strictly treated you as a close friend or even a sibling at times, minus Jake and his meaningless flirting.

For some reason your gaze fell to Heeseung, who was still completely stiff beside you. He hadn’t been looking at you before but now he was and you faltered slightly at the hard expression on his face, eyes low with something you couldn’t make out in the dark.

“Shut up Jake, don’t be so stupid.” You were turning away from him quickly as you muttered the words and they dropped it quickly the second they realized you were actually uncomfortable and not just messing around.

The conversation moved on for now but you imagined they’d bring it back up at some point during the weekend. You felt a bit better now that the attention was mostly off of you, Jake’s hand resting on your arm as he played with your sleeve softly. You figured he must be feeling guilty for making such a big deal out of it so you ignored him, happily accepting the invitation to go to bed when Jungwon was standing with a yawn.

The awkwardness of that conversation had made you complete forgot about your sleeping situation but you were reminded quickly as the other boys stood to also head to bed, Heeseung standing slowly and hovering near you.

He followed behind you closely as you ducked into the tent but neither of you spoke as you zipped it up, sitting down on the sleeping back to shuffle through your bag as you searched for your pajamas.

You felt bad it was so awkward between the two of you. You’d always felt more cautious around him considering your past crush but you never let it show, not wanting him to think you liked him less than the others or worse, realize the truth was the direct opposite. Still there was something clearly different in their air now and it was suffocating you a bit as you waited for him to joke around or say something stupid to break the tension.

“Are you into Jake?” When he finally spoke it threw you off completely, not expecting him to say something like in such a hardened tone.

You froze in your movements inside your bag, looking up at him in confusion. “What?”

He was halfway sat leaning against a few pillows, watching you from the other side of the tent with that same unreadable expression he had by the fire. He didn’t clarify what he said, knowing you had heard him and you watched him for a few seconds in silent bewilderment.

“Why would you ask me that?” You mumbled, shaking your head and looking down at your disorganized clothes pile again. It slightly agitated you that he hadn’t spoken to you for most of the day and yet that was the first question from his mouth.

“Just wondering.” He shrugged like it wasn’t a completely taboo topic to be questioning you about but his face was anything but casual. “Are you into any of them? Would you hook up with one of us?”

“How can you ask me that? Would you ask one of the boys that or is it because I’m the only girl?” You glared at him as you spoke.

“I’d ask them if I cared.” He stated and you scoffed, not fully understanding what he was attempting to imply in his statement.

He wasn’t acting like himself and you felt a bit worried that maybe you had done something to upset him or weirded him out with your awkward demeanor. You didn’t bother to reply again, grabbing your toothbrush with the pajamas you’d chosen and leaving the tent swiftly through the zippered door.

You were speed walking down towards the public bathrooms and showers on the other side of the camp site, flustered from his random interrogation and replaying the day to decide if you’d done anything that could make him think that.

Jake was touchy with everybody, especially you at times since you objected the least but he always had been and it definitely wasn’t a new and shocking thing for him to be touching your arm or hugging onto your side. You contemplated it potentially being due to his comment about you being hot but considering the context in which he said it, you didn’t think that was the reason.

A hand around your arm was snapping you from your thoughts and you let out a small yelp, spinning around to see Heeseung who was panting slightly.

His eyes were wide a bit like he was worried and you saw a flash of guilt pass through then when he saw your flushed face. He squeezed your arm for a second before letting it go and you gave him a questioning stare at the fact he had seemingly rushed out of the tent to follow you into the darkness.

“Let me walk you there.” He blurred out and gestured to the fact he was also holding his pajamas and night hygiene products. “It’s dark, you shouldn’t be out here alone.”

You scoffed slightly at his concern, both of you knowing you weren’t in any danger at the campsite and it was barely a ten minute walk through a lit trail, but nonetheless you nodded at him and continued walking with him now at your side. He didn’t say anything else and neither did you, parting ways silently once you got to the building and he went to the male side.

You took a second to breathe once inside, leaning your elbows on the counter and looking at yourself in the mirror underneath the yellow flickering lights. You brushed your teeth quickly and changed into a comfortable sweater and shorts, wandering back outside to see Heeseung already there and leaning against the wall.

He watched as you walked past him silently, lingering for a second before jogging to catch up with you.

“I’m sorry.” He was muttering and you looked at him for a second before focusing back in front of you so you didn’t trip over the bumpy terrain. “I shouldn’t have asked you that.”

You shrugged softly and you felt his arm bump into yours as you walked side by side, approaching the tent in silence. You didn’t want to talk about it anymore, certainly not wanting to hear the reason he thought you’d be hooking up with Jake of all people.

When you finally were back inside and putting your toothbrush away you tried to ignore the fact he was climbing onto the large sleeping bag waiting for you to join inside it before he could zip it up completely. Your heart was pounding thinking about sleeping next to him and you suddenly felt overly hot despite the cold chill of the night.

You’d slept next to Heeseung before, all accustomed to sharing beds or living room floors during sleepovers, sometimes even all smushing together inside Jungwon’s van when you had a particularly long late night adventure. Yet it felt extremely intimate to be alone together and zipped up inside a sleeping bag.

Still you had no other option and the cold was starting to get to you considering your pajama shorts, so you scooted over onto the staticky fabric and held your breath as he leaned over you to seal it.

He laid back onto his back and you fell into more silence, not quite touching but you could feel his shoulder only a few inches from yours, rising and falling as he took deep breaths. He was shifting a bit to try and get comfortable and directly bumped into you, freezing at the contact but not making any move to scoot further away.

“I really am sorry for asking you that.” He was suddenly speaking but his voice was so quiet you barely heard him at first, a tired rasp lacing his words.

“It’s fine Hee. Not a big deal.” You whispered back, the air feeling strangely delicate. His hand was touching your wrist randomly but you assumed it was an accident, sparing him a glance at his touch and finding him staring at the roof of the tent.

“Pissed me off when he said that.” His voice was still low but it was hardening again like it had earlier and you winced slightly, confused at his mood changes. Heeseung was never the type to get angry and definitely not somebody who would voice it so openly like this. “Is that weird to say?”

“I’m not sure I get what you mean.” You were bending your legs so your feet were flat against the tent floor and your knees were pointed upwards, feeling strangely vulnerable at the conversation topic.

His hand that was barely grazing your wrist was moving now and you stiffened when he completely grasped it, sliding slowly down your arm until he could feel your palm under his finger tips. You sucked in a breath at his strange actions, never really directly touching him before despite how close you all were to each other.

“I don’t think I know what I mean either.” He was letting out a small self deprecating laugh but he squeezed your hand now that they were intertwined. “I just know whenever he touches you it makes me feel crazy.”

Your heart felt heavy at his sudden confession and you were slightly dizzy as you were trying to process what he was saying and what it meant if he was implying what you thought he might be. It seemed like he was trying to tell you that he was jealous of Jake, jealous of him for touching you earlier and for the way he playfully flirted.

“Jake’s harmless.” You whispered back and you’re not sure why that’s what you chose to address instead of asking him why on earth that would upset him.

“I know.” He said it like he was frustrated, like you were missing the point he was trying to make. “It’s not about that, I don’t know forget it.”

He was unraveling his hand from yours but you instinctively caught him in the middle of his arm, panicked at the thought of him pulling away now that you’ve finally made some progress towards… something you still weren’t fully understanding. But you’d never even toed the line with Heeseung before and you weren’t going to take it for granted.

He was finally glancing at you now that you were practically hugging his arm and his face wasn’t hard anymore, instead having a nervous unsure look that you hadn’t really seen on him before.

“Help me understand.” You loosened your grip on his arm but kept it held against you, breathing heavier as you looked at each other.

He watched you for a while but didn’t say anything just yet, you tried not to flinch when he rolled over on his side so he could face you better and it seemed to work considering his free hand was coming up to push some of your hair behind your ear, resting on your cheek for a second before going back to his side like he hadn’t meant to do it.

“Why did you never have sex with Beomgyu?” He was whispering again and his words sounded particularly vulgar although he sounded like he was genuinely curious.

You didn’t answer for a while because you honestly didn’t have one that wouldn’t make you sound like you were desperate and insane. You could halfway lie and tell him it just didn’t feel right but you had a feeling he would be able to see right through you like he always could.

“It didn’t work right?” He started speaking again before you could and you were turning on your side too so you could look at him in confusion, still holding his arm that was resting in the middle of you. When he saw your confused look he explained further. “Using him to get over me, it didn’t work.”

You froze and your mouth fell open, almost worried you were going to cry considering how embarrassed you felt that he had apparently known your biggest secret this entire time. A sick feeling washed over you and he seemed to notice because he shifted closer to you slightly with a worried expression.

You thought back to how Heeseung had acted on the trip you’d brought your ex boyfriend to. He was more distant than usual but you figured he was just busy and stressed since he had been working so hard, this being confirmed when he couldn’t get time off to attend Christmas.

Now a large part of you was wondering if it was something else, if he had lied so he didn’t have to face you after your breakup. If Jake, somebody he knew and trusted, flirting with you had bothered him tonight then there was no way he hadn’t been even slightly upset considering you and Beomgyu were openly affectionate the entire break.

You tried to not blame yourself for the fact he had missed out on movie night that week, citing he wasn’t feeling well and barely sparing a glance to the two of you curled up together under a blanket on the couch. Remembering how he stared at you over dinner when you were introducing the boy with a bright smile on your face, avoiding his heavy gaze all night because it made your heart feel guilty.

It also made you feel incredibly stupid. Not only did he seem to know you were in love with him but he also determined your entire reasoning for rushing into a relationship.

“You knew?” Your hurt was shown clearly in your tone and his eyes saddened a little.

“Of course I knew, I thought we both did.” He shook his head a little like he was finding himself stupid. “Imagine my surprise when you come home with a boyfriend.”

“You left.” You spat out to him, squeezing his arm at the reminder he had willingly moved farther away from you than anybody else. Despite the fact you’d spent multiple nights together talking about the colleges you’d choose and he assured you he wouldn’t go far if he didn’t pick the one you were set on.

“I had to.” He sounded pained and stressed out like it had been weighing on him and your heart clenched considering you knew exactly how he felt.

As frustrated as you were at the situation you imagined it would’ve been hard for him too, having feelings for you the same way you did but never being sure. You definitely did your best to hide it to keep your friendship steady since it was your priority and you tried to think about how hurt you would be if he suddenly brought a girlfriend to your holidays, stomach turning at the thought.

“I am over you.” You said it forcefully as you tried to salvage any bit of friendship that was left but neither of you believed the words you were saying, his eyebrow raising as he watched you with a curious expression.

“Yeah?” He was mumbling and you squeezed his arm instinctively at his deepened tone and the way his voice quirked up in a question. You nodded your head and hummed softly in agreement, standing behind your claim.

He was shifting closer again and your nose bumped against his, causing you to suck in a sharp breath.

You tried not to think about the fact this was the closest you’d ever been to him, tried not to think about how he basically just confessed to you and taken almost two decades worth of weight off your shoulders. You especially tried not to think about the fact his eyes were flicking down to your lips every few seconds.

You didn’t think about anything at all when he was finally kissing you, closing your eyes immediately and leaning into each other like this was something you did often. Despite how constant you’d thought about what it would be like to kiss him one day, you were still surprised by how natural it felt.

It didn’t make you nervous to lean into him, not even when he let out a small huffy groan when he rolled onto his back so you could be laying halfway on top of him.

Something about kissing Heeseung came naturally to you and he seemed to be thinking similarly considering the way he let out a small relieved sigh when you pulled away to breathe, big hands coming up to tangle in your hair and hold your face still above his as he studied your swollen lips and dazed expression.

He gave you a soft smile and your lips quirked up at the sight of it, feeling content and happy despite your stomach lighting up with those familiar butterflies, leaning back down to kiss him again before you wasted any more time.

[dragonflylady77]

the bit that mattered

a Harringrove Corner Pride fic (all told in Robin's POV) and a present for @whenyouwishuponastar7 and @discodeviant

I was given the prompt 'enemies to soulmates' and then I stumbled upon this post by @imsodishy with tags by @gravegroves and I knew I had a winner. Also, as a matter of interest, I found the doodle by @ihni from the same post...

Oh and this other post by @ihni also inspired a scene in the fic.

Harringrove & Buckleway | 7.2k

Tags: enemies to soulmates, Robin POV, Billy and Robin are secret queer besties, fake dating to throw parents off the scent of queer teenagers, Steve's bisexual awakening

Robin helps Steve realize his soulmate was under his nose this whole time, he just had to give a guy a chance...

“Can you run that one past me again, dingus?” Robin couldn't believe the sob story Steve was telling her. She’d heard about the fight back in November, of course, because the rumors had made the rounds at school for over a month. But listening to Steve recount his version of what had happened was leaving a bad taste in her mouth.

“Really?” He sat on the metal stool they kept behind the counter for when they were the only ones on shift. Standing around in an empty store was murder on the feet.

“Come on, Steve, humor me,” Robin said as she refilled the container of sprinkles.

They’d been working at Scoops Ahoy together for a few weeks now, and Robin was pretty sure she was Steve’s only friend who was his age. Those kids of his kept coming in for free ice cream, and so he could sneak them into the movies via the back corridor, but Robin knew Steve didn’t consider them his friends. Not really.

Heather Holloway had come in after her shift at Hawkins Community Pool, and Robin had managed to serve her that one scoop of strawberries and cream without blushing too much. Heather was so pretty with her long dark hair and her big brown eyes and bright red lips… Whenever Robin dreamed about meeting her soulmate, it was usually a girl who looked like Heather. She’d never told anyone about it, and kept the soulmark on her right wrist hidden under the band of her watch. 

Heather had asked the guy who was with her if he wanted something but he’d said no. Robin had seen him around before, at school mostly. She’d briefly wondered if maybe he was dating Heather but the way he kept sneaking glances at Steve made her think that it was more likely she was not the only queer teen in Hawkins. She was pretty sure Steve had no idea, about her or about the guy, whose name, Steve had said with the utmost rancor, was Billy Hargrove. 

“I’m waiting,” she said, glancing at Steve before she checked on the glace cherries. He’d already told her all about the Upside Down, and while she hadn’t seen any proof, she knew that weird stuff happened in Hawkins, so Steve’s story about monstrous creatures from another dimension, and a girl who could move things with her brain, made as much sense as anything else she’d heard. 

Steve groaned but he complied. “Fine. Mrs. Byers, Nancy and Jonathan took Will to the chief’s cabin. Chief Hopper and El went to the lab to close the gate and I stayed behind at the Byers house with the kids because someone had to. Then Hargrove showed up. Max freaked out, she said he was gonna kill her, so I went outside to talk him down, and like, make him leave.”

“He came to get his sister, must have had a reason, you didn't think of that?”

“She was terrified, Robin. And she was right. I mean, he shoved me to the ground then went into the house and attacked Lucas.”

“From what you said to me, he asked about his sister and you lied to his face.”

“Well, yeah, but…”

“Do you not see the problem here?”

“No! He attacked Lucas so I punched him then we had a fight and he broke a plate on my head. A plate, Robin! I still have a scar!”

“Uh huh,” Robin deadpanned, because she knew Steve enough to know he had a flair for the dramatic. That said, he had shown her the scar. It was nowhere near as big or noticeable as his antics made it to be, but she wasn’t about to tell him that.

“And then he used me like his own personal punching bag until I passed out from the pain. The kids told me Max stabbed him in the neck with that syringe she found on the dresser and told him to leave us alone. Then we went into the tunnels to help El.”

“And you took his car.”

“Max drove his car, yes, but I had nothing to do with that, I was unconscious in the backseat for most of the ride.”

“I will grant you that one.”

“Oh thank you, o wise one.”

“Don't get fresh with me, Steven. You really don't see how wrong that whole situation looks from the outside?”

“What are you talking about? Hargrove is the one who showed up and attacked us. He gave me a concussion, Robin. The guy is a psycho.”

Robin lets out a sigh. She felt like getting the whiteboard out to help Steve understand how wrong he was, but the You suck/You rule tally was ongoing. She looked around but the store was still thankfully devoid of customers. Mondays after lunch were mostly dead, affording her and Steve much needed bonding time. “Okay, so, let's recap, and please do not interrupt me.” 

“Fine.”

“The guy shows up looking for his thirteen-year-old sister at a house he doesn’t know, in the middle of the woods. The only people there with his sister are a bunch of thirteen-year-old boys and Steve ‘the Hair’ Harrington. The same Steve Harrington everyone knows is a hit with the ladies and who is rumored to have slept with over half the female population of Hawkins High.”

Steve opened his mouth but Robin glared at him and he closed it again.

“I said do not interrupt me. I know neither of us has siblings, but I have girl cousins and I know that my aunt would not take it well if one of her daughters was alone in a house filled with teenage boys, my uncle even less so. You lied to him about the sister he was looking for, you antagonized him, and then you threw the first punch. Is it any wonder he fought back? And don’t answer that, it was rhetorical. That means it doesn’t need an answer.”

“I know what it means, thanks. I did graduate from high school.”

“Good for you, now shut up. From what I’ve heard your children say when you illegally let them into the back corridor, Max’s stepfather seems like a total hardass, and she’s sneaking around a lot. Which leads me to believe her big brother, the aforementioned Billy Hargrove, may well have been under orders to bring her back, or he was trying to get her home before their parents came back. Either way, it seems likely that the older sibling would have been left in charge of the younger one.”

“You don’t know that for sure. I mean he—”

“Steven MiddleName Harrington, I swear to the goddess…”

“Sorry.”

“So, in all likelihood, Hargrove was left in charge of Max, and she left without telling him, and when he came looking for her, it didn’t go well for anyone, then Max shot her brother up full of some unknown drug from a syringe left unattended—not very safe, but whatever—and you, what, just left him unconscious on the floor while you guys stole his car?”

“Um, yeah, I guess… when you lay it out like that, it sounds really bad.”

“Dingus, that is what happened. Bet his dad was super impressed with him when he got home with no car and no Max.”

Steve groaned, leaning on the counter and resting his head on his folded arms. Robin took pity on him. She put her hand on his shoulder and patted it awkwardly a couple of times.

“I remember that both of you looked rather beat up when you came back to school, though you came back a few days before he did.”

“I did?” Steve sat up and stared at her.

“Oh yeah. I told you before, I’m very observant.”

“Riiiight.”

Robin lightly punched Steve on the shoulder, as punishment for his disbelieving tone. She was way more observant than him, that was for sure. “So, what happened after that?”

Steve shrugged. “Nothing.”

“What do you mean nothing? I thought you said he apologized?”

“Oh, well, yeah. He drove up in his car while I was waiting for Dustin at the arcade, and he said he was sorry about the fight. That’s it. Max said he apologized to Lucas as well.”

“And?”

“And he’s been staying away ever since, like he told Max he would, the night of the fight.”

“After she threatened to pulverize his boy parts with that nail bat you keep in the boot of your car, right?”

“Yeah, well, I don’t really remember that part, cos, yanno, concussion from that plate he smashed on my head, but Dustin told me about it in great detail, many many times.”

“That kid needs to learn to shut up, I swear.”

Steve chuckled. “He grows on you.”

“Yeah, like mold,” Robin deadpanned, making Steve cackle.

*****

Three days later, Robin was deep in the stacks at the library when she bumped into someone, causing them to drop the handful of books they were carrying.

“Shoot, sorry, I wasn’t paying attention,” she said, crouching to help.

“It’s okay, Buckley. I got it.”

Robin fell on her ass from the surprise. “You know my name?”

“Uh, yeah?” Billy Hargrove said, straightening up and offering her a hand up.

Robin accepted the help, still in shock, then followed the guy to the closest study table where he’d left his messenger bag. She sat across the table from him, her eyes never leaving his face.

“You gonna say something or you just gonna stare at me for the rest of the day? Only I have a shift at the pool in a bit.” He lifted an eyebrow at her, daring her to speak up.

“Oh, um, sorry. It’s just… how do you know my name?” She really, really, needed to know.

“You’ve been in my AP English class since I moved here and you play the French horn with the band every time we play a home game. Course I know your name.”

“Oh.”

“And…” Billy leaned forward, gesturing at Robin to do the same.

She complied, and watched, confused, as Billy looked around to see if anyone was near, before he whispered, “I’ve seen the way you look at Hank, and I can help, if you want.”

“Hank? I don’t…” Robin shook her head. The conversation was taking a surreal turn.

“Sorry, Heather. Holloway.”

“Oh.” Robin felt her cheeks heat up and it was her turn to look around, fidgeting with her rings.

“Don’t worry,” Billy whispered, both hands flat on the table. “I’m not gonna out you to anyone. I may be an asshole, but I wouldn’t compromise someone’s safety like that.”

“Ho-how did you…?” Robin stammered, glad she was sitting down. She felt like a breeze would have knocked her down. She hadn’t even told Steve, and he was her best friend. Maybe.

“Let’s just say you’re not the only one who has to hide who they truly are, for fear of repercussions.”

“When you say repercussions…?” She had to know. She had an inkling about Billy’s dad from some things she’d heard Max say but having confirmation she was right would be vindicating, especially the next time Steve brought up The Evil Billy Hargrove...

“Let’s just say I like being alive, Buckley, and leave it at that, ay?”

Ouch.

“Robin. And you must be joking. Please tell me you’re joking.”

“I had to tell the doctor I fell down some stairs and broke my wrist because Max told my dad she’d seen me sitting with a guy in the library at my old school, Robin, so you tell me. I was tutoring the kid in math but Neil didn’t give a fuck. Right after that, he moved us to this podunk town in the middle of fucking nowhere. Wasn’t fun driving with a cast, let me tell you.”

“Is that really why you moved here?” It seemed a bit far-fetched to her, relocating an entire family because of a misunderstanding like that.

“Well, Susan’s sister lives in Indianapolis, but Neil was more than happy to move me across the country to a less… permissive state.”

“Is California really better for, yanno, people like… like us ?” Robin whispered, elated her hunch had been correct and that she suddenly had someone her age to talk to about these things. 

“Oh yeah. Well, I mean, it can still be dangerous, but, fuck, dude, me and some friends drove up to L.A. last year for the Pride parade and it was fucking amazing.”

“Oh my goddess… You have to tell me all about it, please!”

“Another time, friend. Right now, we need to come up with a plan for you, before I go to work.”

Robin’s cheeks were heating up again. “Oh, um, no, no, it’s okay, there’s no need.”

“Buckley, why do you think that Hank drags me to the stupid mall after every shift? It’s not for the ice cream, because her parents are loaded and she’s got a freezer full of nicer ice cream than your strawberry and cream at home…”

“Maybe she’s just your decoy so you can enjoy the view…”

Billy laughed and Robin startled. She didn’t remember ever hearing him laugh. They received glares from the librarian and a forbidding ‘shhhh’ that made them both silently snicker.

Billy sat back in his chair, the mirth now gone from his eyes. “The difference, dear Robin, is that the view I enjoy hates my everliving guts and I have zero chance in hell to ever close that deal, due to said view’s inclinations, while you, my musically inclined friend, don’t even realize how close you are to getting what you want.”

“You think so?”

“I know so.”

Billy’s watch started beeping, earning him another glare from the librarian, even though he silenced it quickly. “That’s my alarm. Need to get to the pool for my shift. I’ll catch you later. Think about what I said.”

Robin watched Billy leave, marveling at the absolutely unexpected yet terribly exciting turn her afternoon had taken.

*****

Steve looked like he hadn’t slept since their last shift together two days ago and Robin wasted no time telling him as much. He threw a dark look her way but said nothing.

“Aw, come on, dingus, don’t be like that. What’s keeping you from your beauty sleep?”

“This is all your fault, you know,” Steve bit out as he moved to refill the next container of sprinkles. 

Robin didn’t understand why the store only offered sprinkles in the colors of the flag, but that might be because she didn’t really have a patriotic bone in her body. “How is it my fault?” she said, holding the jar of red sprinkles for Steve.

He glared at her as he put down the white sprinkles and picked up the red ones. “You made me feel guilty for something that happened over six months ago.”

“And? I didn’t realize there was an expiry date on figuring out you did something shitty and taking steps to fix it.”

“Oh, now I have to fix it as well?” Steve argued, spinning so fast the Scoops hat fell off his head.

Robin bent down to pick it up and put it down on the counter with a sigh. “Steve…”

“Robin. I draw the line at one concussion a year, thank you.”

“Oh my goddess, Steve, Billy isn’t going to punch you if you apologize for lying to his face.”

“One, you don’t know that, and two, since when are you on a first name basis with the guy? Pretty sure you didn’t even know his name when you made me tell you about the fight over and over the other day,” Steve said, fixing her with a stare that might work on his kids but didn’t work on her.

All the same, Robin was happy to be saved from answering by a slew of customers that kept them so busy they had to take their breaks at different times. Steve finished his shift earlier than her and she was only too happy to wave him off. The look he gave her before he walked out the door told her that he would demand answers the next time they saw each other.

Walking to the bus stop after her shift ended and cursing herself for asking her mom for a ride to the mall earlier that day instead of taking her bike, Robin startled when a vaguely familiar blue Camaro slowed down alongside her.

“Hey, Buckley. Fancy a ride home?”

Robin stopped and looked through the open passenger window with a grin. “Hargrove. Are you stalking me?”

“You should be so lucky. Get in, we need to talk.”

Dropping her bag in the back before settling into the passenger seat, Robin angled her body towards Billy. “Well?”

Billy threw the butt of his cigarette on the road then pulled away from the curb, waiting until they were back on the road into town to open his mouth. “Dropped off Hank at the mall after our shift, her mom is getting her a new outfit for our date on Saturday.”

What? Robin’s fingers dug into the leather seat under her. “A date? You’re going on a date with Heather? But I thought—”

“Relax, Robin, I told you I would help and I’m gonna. Me and Hank had a chat the other day after I saw you at the library and we came up with a plan.”

“Oh?” Robin wasn’t sure what else to say. She didn’t like feeling confused and so far both her interactions with Billy Hargrove had left her on the back foot.

“Yeah. Thing is, we figured if her parents, and my dad, think we’re dating, it will get them off our backs.” 

“Okay…” That made sense to Robin. Being a queer teenager in small town America was scary if your parents weren’t accepting, and Robin knew she was lucky in that respect. Her parents were soulmates and they’d always told her they loved her and would love whoever her soulmate turned out to be. 

“So the idea is that on Saturday night, I'm gonna pick her up, then pick you up, and we're gonna go over to the drive-in in Marion, and then I'll make myself scarce until the movie is over.”

“Oh god. You’re gonna… you’re… and she… oh god.” Robin couldn’t breathe. This was really happening. She was going on a date. With a girl. With Heather . 

She didn’t realize Billy had stopped on the side of the road until he was crouching on the ground next to her, holding her hands and telling her to breathe.

“Deep breaths, Robin. That’s it. You got this.”

“I…I… oh god…”

“Hey. Calm down. It’s gonna be okay, you know why?”

“Why?”

“She likes you. She really likes you.”

“She does…?”

“Yeah. And you know what else?”

“No.”

“I’ve seen the way you look at her, and I’ve seen how animated she is when it’s just the two of us and she won’t stop talking about you. And I wonder…”

“What?”

“Your soulmark wouldn’t happen to be a flower by any chance?”

Robin eeped and she took her hands back to clutch at her right wrist. What the fuck was happening right now? She must be dreaming, there was no other explanation.

“No, dude, you’re not dreaming” Billy grinned. “I show you mine, you show me yours?”

Robin nodded because she couldn’t trust herself to keep her thoughts out of her mouth. Her eyes bugged out when Billy removed the watch he kept on his right wrist. His skin wasn’t as tanned under the strap and she immediately spotted the five point crown lightly etched on the inside of Billy’s wrist.

She scrambled to take off her own watch and share her own soulmark. “I’ve never shown it to anyone, not even my parents,” she said, her eyes tracing the familiar lines of the small violet. It had felt too private to share with anyone, not that she had many friends anyway.

“My friend Argyle back in Cali is the only one who knows about mine. Doubt Neil would take too kindly to this confirmation his useless son is a fa—”

“Don’t say that word,” Robin urged him. Then she remembered something Billy had said at the library. “Ooh!” She slapped a hand on her mouth then slowly let it drop. “A crown. I get it now. You think Steve is…”

“I don’t think, I know.” Billy sounded so defeated it broke Robin’s heart.

“How can you be so sure?”

“Basketball practice, Robin. Communal showers don’t hide much, even if you’re doing your best not to look.”

“Crap.”

“Exactly. So let’s focus on getting you and Hank together instead, alright?” Billy said, standing up again and putting his watch back on.

Robin did the same and waited until Billy was back in the driver’s seat. “Billy?”

Billy glanced at her then back at the road. “Yeah?”

“I, um, I was talking with Steve the other day at work, about that fight you guys had last November, at the Byers’ house, and I may have impressed upon him how wrong it looked for your thirteen-year-old sister to be alone in a strange house with a bunch of teenage boys, and, um, there is a slight chance that he might decide to apologize for lying to you and throwing the first punch, and yanno, taking your car while you lay full of unlabeled drugs on a dirty floor. Or something.”

“I’m sorry, what?”

“You heard me. So if he does, could you… not punch him? Maybe?”

“If, and that’s a big if, Steve comes to me to apologize, I promise to hear him out.”

*****

“Hey, dingus?”

It was Friday night, and Robin was lying on Steve’s couch eating popcorn from a giant bowl on the floor. He was sitting next to it on a cushion. Robin wasn’t really paying attention to the movie Steve had put on, too keyed up about the motherflippin’ date she was going on the next evening. 

Billy was being the perfect wingman so she wanted to return the favor, and that started by testing the waters.

“Yeah?” Steve took a sip of his cola and turned his head to look at her.

“You ever think about what your soulmate might be like?”

“I used to. I had all these grand ideas about all that stuff, and for a bit, I even believed Nancy might be my soulmate.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, but our soulmarks didn’t match, not even a little bit. And after that, I just… stopped.”

“Stopped what?”

“Looking. Hoping. If there’s a person made for me out there, I doubt they’re stuck in Hawkins, yanno? And since I’m never getting out of here…”

“Aw, Stevie, don’t be like that…” Robin patted Steve on the shoulder. “We’ll get out of this place, and you’ll find them, whoever they are.”

Steve let out a disbelieving snort. “Sure… As the person who started the You Rule/You Suck board, you know very well that my chances of that are about as high as my chances of getting into college.”

“What do you think they look like?” Robin asked, shushing him when he groaned his displeasure at her pushing it. “Come on, indulge me.”

“What don’t you tell me about your soulmate instead?” Steve pushed back.

“Um…”

“Ha! Not so keen to share now, are you?” Steve turned around to face her, his back to the TV, movie completely forgotten.

Robin sat up. This would make or break their friendship. She took a deep breath and threw herself into the deep end. “I’ve had the same image of who my soulmate is since I started middle school. I’ve always imagined her with long dark hair, brown eyes and—”

“Shiny red lips that match her work uniform and a first name that starts with H?”

Robin felt the tip of her ears heat up. Steve was watching her with his usual smile, and he wasn’t ordering her out of his house.

“I know I’m not the most observant person, but even I noticed how often Heather comes in for one scoop of the least interesting flavor we sell. And she’s hated my guts since kindergarten so…”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before. I wasn’t sure how you’d react, learning I’m into… you know… girls,” Robin whispered the last word, even though Steve admittedly already knew and they were alone in his house. It still felt like something she should hide; less so when she was hanging out with Billy, which seemed to happen more since that day at the library. They’d started spending their free periods together at the same study table of the seniors home room most days.

“You’re my friend, Robin.” Steve said. “Pretty much my only friend. And I’m not gonna risk losing that because we both like boobies.”

The serious way Steve said it launched Robin into a laughing fit and Steve joined her. When it ended, they were both sitting on the floor, her legs on his lap, the TV screen a flurry of static.

“Hey.”

“Yeah?”

“Can I see your soulmark?” 

Steve shrugged. “Sure.”

To Robin’s surprise, Steve whipped off his shirt, dropping it on top of her legs, before lifting his left arm. He angled his head.

“It’s right there, on my ribs, by my armpit.”

Robin peered at the area Steve had indicated and, sure enough, there it was. A crown with five points, matching Billy’s perfectly. She couldn’t quite silence the ‘eep’ that escaped her and Steve frowned at her as he put his shirt back on.

“What?”

“Nothing. A crown for King Steve. Fitting.” She moved her legs off Steve and got back up onto the couch, her mind going a mile a minute. She needed to find a way to plant a seed in Steve’s mind, to help him open his horizon to a different possibility. She knew you couldn’t make a person queer, of course, but the universe had decided these two boys were soulmates, so she had to do something to help. 

She tuned back into what Steve was saying.

“...left that king bullshit behind in high school when I realized I wanted to be a better person.”

“So it wasn’t just because you wanted in Nancy Wheeler’s pants?” Robin couldn’t help the snide remark, grinning as she said it.

“Oh my god, Robin!” Steve shoved her shoulder. “What about you? What’s yours?”

“A flower, on the inside of my wrist,” she told him, thinking how odd it was that two boys linked by fate had asked her the same question within a few days of each other.

“Dainty,” Steve said with a snort and it was Robin’s turn to shove him.

Still laughing, Steve stood to go put another movie on then took his spot in front of the couch again. “Hey, you wanna go for a milkshake tomorrow after work? My treat. You can help me figure out how I’m gonna apologize to Billy Hargrove without getting punched.”

“For fuck’s sake, Steve, stop making him out to be such a monster.”

“Sorry, I forgot you’re president of his fan club now. My bad.” Steve’s posture went all rigid and he kept his eyes on the screen in front of them.

Robin took a deep breath before she replied with something she would for sure regret. She forced a smile and slid onto the floor next to Steve, resting her head on his shoulder. “Dingus, you’re my best friend, you know that. But I think we’d both benefit from having more friends our age, and unless you really want to hang out with your ex and the guy she dumped you for, our options are limited.”

“But Billy, Robin?”

“Yes, Billy. He’s funny, he’s one of the top students at school, he drives a cool car, and he’s objectively, and by any standards, extremely good looking.”

“I thought you only liked girls.”

“I’m a lesbian, Steven, not blind.”

“I don’t know…”

“Well, I do, and I’m sorry, but I can’t go for a milkshake tomorrow.” Robin paused then whispered, “I, um, I have, um, a date.”

Steve spun so fast Robin fell over onto the carpet.

“A date! Oh my god, Robin! Is it with Heather? How? Wow! What the fuck!”

She sat up, rubbing her elbow that had taken the brunt of her fall. “Ow.”

“I’m sorry! You can’t just spring this on me like that! Spill, lady! I want details!”

“Yes, it’s with Heather. And, uh, it was set up by, um, a mutual friend. We’re going to the drive-in over in Marion. I’ve been kinda freaking out about it, to be honest.”

“A mutu—Oh. I see.”

“Do not start this again, I need my best friend right now, not King Steve’s high school vendetta.”

“Okay, okay, sorry.”

“Tell me something, why does he get under your skin this much?”

“I’m not sure what you mean.”

“Oh please, the mere mention of his name gets your hackles raised like no one else does. From what you’ve told me, it predates the fight you guys had at the Byers’ house. Did you seriously never wonder what it is about Billy Hargrove that makes you react so strongly?”

Steve’s eyes widened but he didn’t say anything. Robin patted Steve’s knee before standing up.

“I’ll get us another drink if you rewind the movie. I missed everything that happened in it so far.”

Steve nodded and moved to the VCR as Robin left the living room for the kitchen. She figured she’d done enough pushing for one evening. 

*****

“Earth to Robin, need you out here, dude.”

Steve’s voice pulled Robin out of her daydreams. She checked her watch to see her break had ended a few minutes ago. She hurried back into the main part of the store and went to work, scooping ice cream like it was her calling while Steve rang the orders on the temperamental till.

Once the after school rush had died down, she picked up the mop and did a quick pass on the blue and white checkered lino while Steve cleared rubbish and wiped melted ice cream off the tables.

“You’ve been spacey all day, Rob. Are you okay? I hope it means you had a good time on Saturday night.”

Robin smiled as she finished cleaning then took the mop back into the back room. She waited for Steve to join her, keeping an eye on the main doors through the small window behind the counter.

“So? How did it go? What movie did you see?”

“I have no idea what the movie was, we were too busy making out in the backseat of the Camaro,” Robin said with a happy sigh. “Best night of my life so far.”

“Camaro? Hargrove’s Camaro?”

“Yes, Stevie. I told you Billy set it up. He picked Heather up first, to make it seem like they’re dating, and get Billy’s dad off his back, then they picked me up. When we got there, he parked the car and went to read his book at the diner on Main Street.”

“That was very thoughtful of him.”

“I don’t know why you’re so surprised. He’s a good guy once you get to know him. Sure, yes, he’s got some anger issues, but anyone would, with a dad like his.”

“Like what?”

“Are you seriously telling me you’ve never heard Max talk about how much of a controlling hardass Mr Hargrove is? I only see your kids when you sneak them in and I’ve heard it enough times.”

“Um, no, I tend to just tune all their chatter out. So he’s bad news?”

“He’s the kind of guy who’s only got bad sides.”

“Oh, okay. Yikes.”

“I probably shouldn’t have told you, because it’s not my story to tell, but I needed you to understand.”

“Thanks. I mean it. I’ve, um, I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said, and I’m gonna apologize to him for my part in that stupid fight.”

“I’m glad to hear it, because he and Heather are coming over after their shift at the pool. We talked about going for burgers and I think you should come with us. It will help sell it a bit more if it looks like a double date.”

Robin chuckled at Steve’s impression of a deer in headlights. “Don’t worry, dingus, we don’t have to hold hands or anything.”

Thankfully, Steve had recovered by the time they closed the store for the day and met Billy and Heather in the food court. Steve took Billy aside briefly and got through his apology without getting punched, like Robin had predicted. The look Billy threw at her when they rejoined her and Heather was filled with new-found gratitude and Robin felt a bit like a miracle worker on a mission from the universe.

They headed out in pairs, Robin giddy with excitement, as Heather’s fingers kept brushing against hers as they walked out of the mall and into the carpark. Neither boys were keen to leave their cars there so they traveled separately to the diner.

They piled up in a booth, Steve and Robin on one side, Billy and Heather on the other, and ordered. They made small talk about the highs and lows of their day at work as they waited for their food. Robin was vibrating with excitement. Heather kept smiling at her as they ate, their ankles locked together under the table. 

When Steve excused himself to go to the bathroom after they’d ordered dessert, Billy leaned forward across the table and smiled at Robin.

“I don’t know what you said to him, but thank you.”

“You deserve better, Billy,” Heather said in a clipped tone, red lips around her straw as she finished her strawberry milkshake commanding Robin’s attention.

“Hank, this is more than I thought I’d get, as little as it is. At least he’s not glaring daggers at me anymore.”

“I’d say you’re welcome,” Robin told Billy with an encouraging smile, “but I’m not done trying.”

*****

Things got better slowly over the next few weeks.

Billy told Robin about Steve showing up at the quarry and how they shared a couple of beers as they smoked some weed and talked.

During another double date at the diner, Steve and Billy got into a very animated conversation about Dune, Billy arguing the book is better, while Steve defended the movie, despite the fact that he had absolutely not read the book. Robin and Heather escaped to make out in the bathroom.

As summer turned to fall, they left Scoops Ahoy to go work at Family Video, and Steve lived through another one of his father’s lectures about his future. He moped around for days afterwards and Robin wasn’t sure how to help then one night, Billy showed up. Robin left them to it and heard later about how they’d raided Mr Harrington’s liquor cabinet and got so extremely drunk they’d passed out on the floor in the den, and woken up cuddling. 

Billy told her he’d pretended to be asleep until Steve went to the bathroom, then he’d gone to the kitchen to make coffee and pretended it hadn’t happened.

Steve hadn’t mentioned it at all. Robin said nothing but took mental note of the daydreaming look on Steve’s face that appeared more often the day after he spent time hanging out with Billy.

Then one day, she arrived for her after school shift at Family Video and headed for the break room to dump her backpack and her jacket, and Steve followed her. He seemed flustered, unusually so.

“You okay, dingus? Did something happen? Mrs. Wheeler get too close again?” Robin asked, a shudder of distaste at the memory of seeing Nancy’s mom seductively running a finger along Steve’s hand as she’d picked up her change a few weeks ago. Steve had washed his hands for like an hour afterwards.

“You!” Steve started, pointing his finger at Robin and pacing the small room. “This is all your fault!”

“What did I do now?”

“You told me to give Billy a chance. You told me I needed to have more friends my age. And I listened to you, and we’ve been hanging out, and talking. About all sorts of stuff. And let me tell you, lady, you now have serious competition for your best friend spot, just saying.”

“Okay…” Robin still didn’t see what about that would warrant the state Steve was in. “I fail to see how any of this is a bad thing, dingus.”

Steve collapsed onto the rickety chair that sat by the equally rickety card table Keith had installed in one corner. Robin cringed at the loud creaking noise it made when Steve’s knee started bouncing in time with Steve running his fingers through his hair.

She knelt on the floor next to Steve, and reached up to get his hands free from the now tangled mess on top of his head, really concerned now. “Sweetie, what happened?” she asked softly, cutting through his mutterings.

“Dreams, Robin.”

“What kinds of dreams, Steve?”

The look he gave her was enough of a clue. “Oh, okay… It’s normal to have, um, graphic dreams, you know that, we learned about it in Sex Ed class.”

“Sex Ed classes didn���t exactly cover having graphic and detailed sex dreams about your male best friend, Robin,” Steve told her in a rushed whisper.

“Well… no, they did not. But there’s nothing wrong with having dreams.”

“But what does it mean?” He sounded haunted by it and it broke Robin’s heart.

She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and gave him a rare hug before sitting back down. “It doesn’t have to mean anything. Or it could mean that you like both, girls and boys, I mean. Or…”

“Or what?”

“Remember when you asked me about my soulmate and I pretty much described Heather?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, as it turns out, her soulmark is the exact same flower, only in a different spot.”

“I’m happy for you, I really am, it’s great, but that doesn’t help me much right now. I need the dreams to stop. I am going crazy. I can’t sleep, because every time I close my eyes, I…”

“Steve, sweetie, maybe the universe is trying to tell you to stop fighting it.”

“Fighting what?”

“You know that crown on your ribs?”

Steve closed his eyes and shook his head. “Don’t say it.” His knee was bouncing again, faster than before.

“Steve...”

“Don’t say it, Robin.” Steve opened his eyes again and he looked about to cry.

“I’ve seen its match.”

“You’re telling the truth, aren’t you?”

“I would never lie to you, dingus,” Robin told him earnestly. The ding of the counter bell interrupted her train of thought. “Fuck. You stay here, take the time you need, and I’ll go deal with the customers.”

“Thank you.”

“It’s gonna be okay, Stevie. You’ll see.” 

She left him there, closing the door behind her as she stepped into the area behind the counter. Her eyes narrowed when she took in the gaggle of Steve’s children gathered on the other side. She let out an exaggerated sigh so they’d know she didn’t have the patience to deal with them.

“What do you lot want?”

The annoying kid who never shut up glared at Robin. “We need to talk to Steve.” 

“Well, you can’t. He’s not here.”

“His car is outside.”

Robin shrugged. “Dunno what to tell you. I’m not his keeper. He’s not here and if you’re not going to rent videos, you can leave. Shoo.”

She stared them down until they left, grumbling as they filed through the door.

“Hey.”

“Jesus!” Robin startled, not expecting Billy to appear in front of her. “Oh my god, wear a bell or something. I nearly had a heart attack.”

Billy chuckled and leaned onto the counter. “Sorry, Rob. Didn’t mean to scare ya. Is he really not here or were you just trying to get rid of the weird kids brigade?”

“Oh he’s here. He’s having a major freak-out in the break room.”

“Fuck. Is he gonna be alright?”

Robin and Billy had become pretty close over the past few months, as they bonded over shared interests and her secret relationship with Heather had progressed. She knew he’d made his peace with being nothing more than best friends with Steve, despite their matching soulmarks or his own feelings for Steve. She loved how much he cared for her favorite dingus, and she wasn’t about to start lying to him about Steve.

“I’m not sure. He was pretty shaken up.”

Billy groaned and rested his head between his arms on the counter. “It’s probably my fault.”

“What do you mean? What happened?”

He lifted his head and stared at a spot on the wall. “Last weekend, at the quarry, I stupidly mentioned soulmates. No, not like that , I just… asked him if he ever dreamed about his. Then he asked about mine. I stayed vague, for obvious reasons, but he kept asking and I may have snapped then driven off.”

“What the hell, Billy?”

“I know, I know, but I felt cornered, okay?” He ran a hand over his face then finally looked Robin in the eye. “I don’t know how much longer I can go on pretending he’s not everything I’ve ever wanted.”

Robin heard a click behind her and noticed Billy turning deathly white and frozen on the spot.

“Billy?”

At the sound of Steve’s voice, Robin turned around to find him standing in the doorway.

“Hey, dingus,” Robin called out with extra cheer in her voice. “Feeling better?” 

Steve ignored her, his attention on Billy whose eyes hadn’t left his.

“Do you think we could talk?”

“Of course, pretty boy.” Billy cut himself off, and Robin spotted his cheeks getting pink under his tan. “I mean, sure, here, or…?”

“Here is fine.” Steve half turned, looking at Robin, a question in his eyes.

“I’ll cover for you, no worries.”

She motioned for Billy to follow Steve, and she’d never seen him look so scared. She closed the door behind Billy and turned the music up a couple of notches, just in case…

When they came out of the break room forty minutes later, they both looked disheveled and Steve was sporting a rather damning hickey on his collarbone.

He came to stand next to her at the counter and they both watched Billy walk towards the exit, though Steve’s eyes strayed decidedly lower than Robin’s. Billy pushed the door and turned to give them a little wave before he stepped onto the sidewalk.

“Not a word, Robin. Not a word.”

Robin mimed zipping her lips together but that didn’t stop her smile. She bumped her shoulder into Steve’s and he bumped hers back.

A large group of customers entered the shop and the two of them got to work, dealing with returns that needed rewinding, and issuing new movies. The job wasn’t exactly rewarding, they didn’t get paid much, but all that didn’t matter, because working together had led them both to find their soulmates.

And that was the bit that really mattered.

[lonelychicago]

a bunch of prompts i like and want to write/read

pining after your best friend and refusing to admit your feelings but making up ridiculous excuses to spend time together. like seriously, at least come up with a decent excuse, this is just pathetic at this point.

going as each other’s “platonic” date to a mutual friend’s wedding (who are you kidding?)

i just found out i have magic and shit keeps going so wrong and oh god what did i just do to my crush/lover/whatever HOW DO I FIX IT

we work in the same office and you have a goddamn squeaky chair and you wONT FUCKING STOP SQUEAKING IT BECAUSE YOU KNOW IT ANNOYS ME

I don't think you understand how much your good morning texts legitimately keep me from rotting in bed all day 

my love is your arm stuck in the claw machine. you were going to steal that prize for me?? oh my gosh. let me rescue you and also show you how to actually do this

i just told you i'm a vampire and you're surprisingly okay with this. in fact you're turned out and do you seriously want me to suck your blood while i fuck you? what the fuck is wrong with u?!?!

you just helped me rob a bank and that was so hot, we should make out in the getaway car once the police stops chasing us.

turns out you're my soulmate but you're kind of an asshole and i want to have a serious talk with the universe or the gods or whoever is in charge but then you actually do something nice and sweet for me and fuck, maybe you're not so bad after all. i guess i could spend forever with you or whatever 🙄

i was thinking about how in love with you i am and i texted my best friend to scream about your eyes/arms/thighs/all of the above and WAIT IH FUCK I ACCIDENTALLY TEXTED YOU PLS DON'T READ THIS OH GOD

you just liked a three year old photo of mine on instagram and i didn’t even know you had an account

i thought you hated me but i just accidentally sent you a booty text and you accepted and i am seriously considering it

[catscidr]

I think we have all seen the "Argenti thinks the Reader is Idrila" stuff on here. But what if the reader actually is Idrila? So I wanted to request Argenti/Idrila!Reader (gn or afab reader) headcanons or a oneshot where Idrila, who has taken on a mortal identity after [Insert tragic event here], and meets Argenti. They develop feelings for each other, Argenti finds out she is Idrila, they end up dating. (Maybe or maybe not in that specific order) I thought maybe after protecting her followers from Nanook she disappeared to ensure Nanook doesn't target them anymore? That part isn't as important so feel free to add whatever backstory you think fits^^ Thank you in advance, I really like your writing!

NONNIE omg im booting up star rail rn to stare at him lovingly. also i changed the scenario a smidge so reader is her own person while also being idrila? if that makes sense......?? yeah. also bc otherwise id be writing ten thousand words n i didnt want ur ask to grow dusty in my inbox d(;∀;d) but tysm for the prompt i couldn’t stop thinking about it ueue. also hey gang peep me trying to make my blog look more coherent n nicer looking. am i doin it ⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝ cw: a smidge of amnesia and soulmate trope (it’s not that bad, trust), fluff, love at first sight (does that even count in this scenario....), argenti and reader are dancing around the topic a lot bc argenti is a gentleman and doesn’t want to pressure her to talk. blurbs to set up the plot + a fic after them hehe. not proofread, writer’s block is killing me  includes: fem reader (he refers to reader as "my lady"), argenti, natasha, luocha is kinda there wc: 2,3k

-ˋˏ You’d go to Natasha’s clinic at least once every other day because you always had the worst migraines. To the point where you almost got beat up by a Flamespawn one time when you were clearing out calyxes (thankfully there was a Silvermane guard patrolling the area, otherwise you would’ve been charred). The doctor always says the same thing; “Stop looking for fights so often”, “Let your body rest”, “I can’t prescribe you antibiotics”, and your favorite, “Stop slamming my door open I can’t do anything about your headaches”. She was a good friend, but whenever she repeated how she couldn’t be of any help to your predicament, you’d wish you could just take that glass vial hanging from her outfit and chuck it far, far away out of spite. 

-ˋˏ Obviously it wasn’t her fault- she'd done everything she could. Natasha even had you undergo the Underworld’s equivalent of an MRI scan because of how frequently you would visit her, insisting that something was wrong. The symptoms consisted of forgetting important things too often, feeling a foreign buzz in your limbs and brain, having a sudden burst of elemental energy come out of your attacks and a myriad of benign but annoying, irritating signs that something was up with you. 

-ˋˏ It became more of a chore than anything to leave your room. Some days you felt fine, but then when you’d go out again and beat up wave after wave of enemies in Caverns of Corrosion you would keel over, clutching your head while vague images of what could only be described as a fever dream ran through your mind. 

-ˋˏ You decided to leave the Underworld for some time- considering your absence like some sort of “vacation”. You heard of a wandering doctor (and merchant, apparently) by the name of Luocha and, from the people that crossed paths with him, it seemed like he was extraordinary at his job. A trek to the Xianzhou Luofu would be a long one, but after weighing your options you thought you’d give it a try (it was worth it if it meant you’d stop waking up at ungodly hours, holding your head in your hands while hoping, praying that the pain stops.) 

-ˋˏ You (somehow) made your way to the Xianzhou Luofu from Jarilo-VI. As competent as you were however, being stranded on a foreign planet with no map nor local to guide you was... a challenge. In retrospect, maybe you should’ve gotten in contact with that Luocha doctor and had him come to Belobog instead of you going to him since, well, he was a traveling merchant. Going from planet to planet is what he does (you assume). 

✧✧✧ 

If you had read up more on general information about the Luofu you would have been aware of how many enemies were roaming around the docking area. But you didn’t. So, unbeknownst to you, a rogue mara-struck soldier was on your tail, trying to sneak up to you to snag the goods you hid in your bag (which were basically just different types of painkillers and sustenance that bodes well on an upset stomach. He doesn’t know that though.) 

Your head was throbbing; ever since you set foot on the planet, your physical health had slowly dropped down to levels you wouldn’t be enduring if it wasn’t for the promise of a competent doctor once you get to the main city. Painkillers weren’t working, your feet hurt and to make matters worse, you felt the familiar lack of something in your head. It was so bad to the point where you had to have a tangible mark somewhere to remind you that you did, in fact, just take something for your headache and if you took two more painkillers, your body wouldn’t agree with your decision. It was a struggle even remembering what you did five minutes ago, no way were you going to be in top shape, beating up every enemy crossing your way. 

Clouds began covering the bright sun, casting shadows over the desolate, geometric area. You huff, irritated that, from the looks of it, you won’t be able to find a cozy place to set up camp. Though sleeping on a ground made of primarily iron and steel was considerably less nerve-wracking than sleeping on the mushy, cold, dirty ground of Jarilo-VI. So, with a pout aimed at no one in particular, you find some place that you deemed decent enough to set your humble tent. It wasn’t often that adventurers slept outside of safe zones, however with your condition you couldn’t afford to miss out on some rest and possibly get even more lost than you already are. 

You set your heavy backpack down, rolling your shoulders to soothe the ache in your muscles from carrying something so bulky. As you ruffle through your belongings, you open a bottled soda and take a swift gulp, sighing contentedly at the pleasant taste on your tongue. Now that you were sat and could rest your bones (until you started setting up your tent, at least), your ears were able to pick up on some not-so-distant footsteps. 

There’s no time for you to react; the mara-struck soldier that had been following you lunges at you, aiming for your bag. Your eyes widen and you open your mouth to yell, but before any sound can leave your mouth, a long, red and gold spear pierces the ground between you and the rabid man, making you yelp in surprise. You scurry as far back as you can in your current state; however, the soldier doesn’t have time to take advantage of your weakened stature. The owner of the spear lodges himself before your shaking figure and the mara-struck, yanking his spear out of the ground with impressive elegance, and summons an array of thorny vines to catch your assailant. 

It takes little to no effort for the seasoned fighter to take down the mara-struck as he swings his weapon, swiftly knocking the blunt end on the soldier’s plexus, knocking the wind out of him. A strangled scream leaves his throat as he scampers away, leaving your belongings safe with you and the strange red-haired man. He lowers his spear, careful to keep the sharp edge far from you, and turns around to face you properly. His brows raise a smidge for a split second before he composes himself and bows before you, the action short and curt.  

“It would have been a shame to lose a beauty such as yourself,” he says smoothly, straightening his back to look down at you with a warm smile. He stretches his hand out, a polite offer to help you stand up, as he continues speaking. “My name is Argenti, I belong to the Knights of Beauty. What might you be doing so far away from civilization, dear...?” he trails off, waiting for you to introduce yourself. 

You were in a state of shock, your mind still processing what had happened in such a short amount of time, that you failed to notice the lack of pain at the back of your head. As you meekly tell him your name, you hold onto his hand to help yourself up- as soon as his armored glove comes in contact with your hand something flashes in your mind; too quick to allow you to think about it too much, or to recognize what you saw for a millisecond. 

“So far away from civilization... do you know how to get to the city?” you ask as you feel a glimmer of hope spark in you. His words were refreshing, probably the best thing someone has ever said to you in the past month. He nods, reaching into his pocket to fish out a blue handkerchief embroidered with a delicate gold trim. Argenti hands it over to you and you gratefully take it, blotting the sweat and... dust off of your face. 

“I have made my way around the Luofu for long enough to show someone the way,” he says kindly. “Besides, even if I didn’t, I would still offer to accompany you through your trek. It is my duty as a Knight of Beauty, for I must uphold chivalry and distinguished manners, in the name of the Goddess guiding me.” His words resonate within you, making you beam, nodding in understanding. 

Your reaction doesn’t go unnoticed by the knight. As you hand his handkerchief back, he smiles at you and gestures to your bag. “What brings you so far from your homeworld, my lady?” Argenti asks gently, though a glimmer of doubt swirls in his sparkling, verdant eyes. The question makes you pause, a memory flashing in your mind too suddenly for you to know what it meant. Although, from what you could tell, you knew you could trust him with what troubled you somehow. 

“Ah, it’s a long story,” you start sheepishly, “I’ve been having these incredibly painful migraines recently. And sometimes I feel like my memory is fading too quickly for what would be considered normal,” you say, trailing off slightly at the end. “I’m looking for a healer, a doctor by the name of Luocha...?” 

Somehow, the doctor was currently the least of your worries. You’d never felt so refreshed before, at least not that you could remember; simply being in Argenti’s presence seemed to be enough to make your aches disappear like a starskiff smoothly gliding through a cloudless sky. 

“I’ve seen the man only a handful of times,” Argenti mutters aloud, pulling you out of your thoughts. “I can do my best to guide you to him, but if I may... you don’t seem to be injured?” the knight says, his voice trailing off into a questioning tone despite the observation. You shake your head, wondering how you should explain your predicament to the man. 

“Like I said, it’s a long story,” you say again, shrugging sheepishly. You wondered if you should even go into the nitty gritty- he could always just be making small talk to help you get comfortable or something. Sensing your unease, he changes the spotlight to him instead. 

“There’s no need to delve into details if you wish to keep them secret,” he says with a kind smile, bending down to take ahold of your hand- gently pressing a chaste kiss on the back of your hand. Red flushes your ears immediately, words caught in your throat at the sight of his hair cascading over his shoulders, a beautiful contrast from the gold and silver armor glittering in what was left of the sunlight. 

“As for myself, like I mentioned earlier, I am a Knight of Beauty. I’m on a quest to find my dear Goddess Idrila once more, for I need to pay my respects to them after they saved me from a particularly grim fate.” His words echoed in your mind, your brows knitting together as you felt what could only be described as a cold bucket of water being dunked on your head. “I-Idrila?” you parrot, your voice coming out as a choked noise. Argenti perks up, the hand that had been softly holding onto yours now holding it with a firmer grip, his other hand joining it. 

“Yes, Idrila. Have you ever heard of them? Or...” he trails off, looking deep into your eyes expectantly, almost as if he knew something you didn’t. His eyes seemed to suck you in, bringing a comfortable wave of warmth over you, making you yearn for something. 

“I...” you begin, your gaze falling down to look at your feet. As you thought long and hard about what you wanted to say, what you tried to remember, you slowly look over to his spear, lying flat on the ground- long forgotten since the fight earlier. As if a lightbulb went off above your head, you perk up just as he did, and look at him, beaming. The words were caught in your throat; there was so much you wanted to say, to declare, to do in this moment of clarity, but with how fast your mind was running to catch you up on the current events of your life it was a struggle. 

“Argenti,” you murmur, the name rolling off your tongue smoothly, as you realized seeing the traveling merchant was no longer required. Though the road might have been arduous, and you may have almost lost your mind in the process, being with Argenti suddenly made everything make sense. That’s why your migraines mysteriously disappeared as soon as you were in the knight’s presence, that’s why you had gaps in your memory, that’s why you were freakishly powerful... at convenient times.  

Everything clicked into place. 

The both of you share a pregnant pause, eyes locked together as the world seemed to come to a stop around you. If it were possible, you’re sure there would be delicate, silky rose petals floating around your figures, suspended in the air. You glance down at his lips, and for the first time, make a decision with a clear head. 

His lips felt smooth against yours, the faint taste of vanilla mixed with roses transferring to your own lips. The kiss almost felt like it could be the result of a symbiotic relationship; now that you had Argenti, or at least had him by your side once again, you didn’t think you’d be able to continue on without him. 

[janus-cadet]

The second card according to last week's poll- Husker, our dear old cat man, as The Hermit! It's also the eleventh card for the Hazbin/Helluva fandom. Which is- the most consistent I ever been in drawing for a fandom? Hurray!

The next one, Adam, is already decided- but I'm planning to do two more cards before maybe, eventually, taking a break. So, before we go under the cut for the explanations for the choice of card...

Yes indeedy. It's the mothers' poll.

Back to the grumpy old man!

The Hermit Upright is a card strongly linked to self-discovery and inner wisdom. It invites you to retreat into your private world and experience a deep sense of instrospection- a journey you have to do alone, to find you inner guiding light, and choose the next steps you'll have to take.

It might seem strange to chose Husk to represent it- but as much as his character seems stand-offish and disgruntled, he does strick me as someone who has done a lot of self-reflecting, and is able to see each other characters' situations with a clarity that no one else, in the show, seems capable of. He is aware of who he is, of what mistakes he make: this is a man who knows himself, and who finds wisdom in his own flaws.

And much as the Hermit of the card, he's a man who walked on this path alone (thinking that no one could relate- prefering the quiet and the solitude to the company) until he reached the point when he was ready to let others in, albeit in a small, careful way. Finding, despite himself, a place in the small group of the hotel, and a soulmate in Angel.

But the Hermit card often appears when you are at a pivotal point in your life, and maybe considering a new direction. Would that be, for example... redemption? Now, Husker is not quite there yet- but it's undeniable that his mere involvement with the hotel places him on a pivotal point in life, and one that encourages him to deepen his self-examination. This time to also accept the good in himself, and re-evaluate his personnal goals.

Finally, the Hermit may appear in your life as a spiritual mentor- one that may be an expert in his own right (a wise old bartender, who've seen it all), but who will teach you to find your answers within yourself. Which. Loser, Baby.

Okay, it's a lot of talking already. Bear with me, we're now going on the Reverse Hermit.

For as much as I feel like Husk's character is the most in-tune with himself, the struggles is still undeniable. The Reversed Hermit, therefore, encourages you to search deep within your sould, to help you find your way again, to find your way out of the bottle, and focus on rebuilding yourself. You may be damaged, but you can still go on with your life, and improve your situation; it all starts by working on yourself. Be careful not to isolate yourself too much, too. You should not be fully cutting yourself off from others, like a literal Hermit; do not underestimate the value of the connections you can form with people around you. And really, our dear Husker is getting there!

The Hermit Reversed can also indicate an unwelcome isolation in your relationship: one person may want to be alone or withdraw from the relationship, while the other wants to deepen the connection. You will need to respect each other's request for space (not by pushing your partner off his chair, Husker), but also be there to support as appropriate.

And that's it for today! We'll see each other again tomorrow, when I'll drop the first man himself- Adam, as the King of Pentacles. I hope this silly bird would apreciate the irony.

This is not, actually, the first time I drew the Hermit- but the first one, eh, I really did not like it. So, Husker becomes the official Hermit of the deck!

(If you have time,consider checking my friend @mimmixerenard 's version of humanized!Husker, it's very very good. Here is the link)

[pastryland]

charlos completed fic recommendations

If any of the authors of the fics mentioned here or are tagged and don't want their fics to be here, please let me know and I'll remove it!

Will update this list periodically

❤️ = favorite

⭐️ = I love fics by this author in general

❌ = triggering themes

🔥 = explicit

punctuated all wrong - 7k - ❤️ ⭐️

Prompt: "I don’t know if someone else agrees with me but I’m a sucker for the whole person A falls in love with person B but they think they don’t deserve person B’s love trope and I’d love to see how it would play out with charlos (not saying who’s person A and who person B, even though that should be pretty obvious)"

head over heels - 44k - ❤️ 🔥

“Oh, really, you think that you, Carlos Sainz, somehow have a kink so fucked up that I wouldn’t be able to handle it, do tell me what it is”, he says, “is it spanking maybe, I’m sure you think that’s beyond taboo, you want to drape me over your lap, punish me for being a bad boy?”, Carlos shakes his head, a small glint in his eye, “Bondage then? Do you want to tie me up?”, another shake of the head, “Whips? Paddles? Feathers?”, Carlos continues shaking his head and so Charles leans in further, his voice dipping lower as he continues. “Maybe you’re into age play then”, he pushes closer, so their faces are only inches apart, “do you want me to call you daddy?”, the air between them feels like it’s on fire as Carlos breathes out a hot laugh, giving another miniscule shake off the head. “Then tell me”, Charles demands and waits as Carlos seems to consider him for a moment, before leaning forwards so his lips are next to his ear, his breath hot against his skin, sending shivers cascading down his body. “Love”.

i feel so much, i feel so numb - 23k - ❤️ ⭐️ 🔥

As long as he’s known what a soulmate is, he’s known his soulmate’s name. Carlos. Scrawled along the delicate skin of his right wrist.

can't sleep 'til i feel your touch - 8k - ⭐️ 🔥

“I could...” Carlos trails off, and Charles drops his hands from his temples, looking at him curiously. “You could, what?” “...give you a hand.” He says it so casually that it takes Charles a minute to even attempt at understanding what he means. ~ ~ OR: Charles develops insomnia, and the only thing that helps is...Carlos?

the trials of 2022 - 33k - ❤️ ⭐️ 🔥

A partial summary of the 2022 season, as told by Charles or Carlos, following each race.

dice che ti ama (ma lo sai che mente) - 2k - ⭐️ 🔥

But Charles smiled, dimples out and about, back against the wall of Carlos’ driver’s room. Like he knew he wasn’t in danger. Like he hadn’t entered a lions’ den looking like a three course meal. (Like he knew Carlos was all bark and no bite, and toying with the metaphorical rubber band —stretch, stretch, stretching— wouldn’t ever make it snap into his straight nose.)

Almost Total Wreck - 2k - 🔥 - also has Pierre/Charles

He imagines telling Pierre about it: he spat right in my face and I came like that it was so good, and he’s already replacing the man’s orgasm with his own, making his wounded sounds as he drags it out kicking and screaming, so that by the time he’s done his stomach hurts with it, his head pounds like a fever, more ache than pleasure but that’s what pleasure is, isn’t it?

worthy is the lamb (thank you for the price you paid) - 12k - ⭐️ ❌ 🔥

Predestined (adjective): [ˌpriːˈdes.tɪnd] If you say that something was predestined, you mean that it could not have been prevented or changed because it had already been decided by a power such as God or fate.

my blood is singing with your voice (the saints can't help me now) - 13k - ⭐️ 🔥

He was there. (God was also there.) Carlos walked towards the altarpiece (and the back with the white t-shirt) breathing through his nose like a bull. The cross on his chest wasn’t warm because it got a little chilly at night. He turned. “Carlos.” “Hey, Charles.” “You say my name weird.” Carlos swallowed. “Oh—” “I like it.”

all the king's horses, all the king's men - 38k - ❤️ ⭐️ 🔥

Carlos Sainz was eight years old when he fell in love. (For the first time.) It was at a race track. (It wouldn’t be the last time.)

little of your love - 5k - ⭐️ 🔥

in which Charles gets accidentally knocked up by Pierre, and he’s determined to raise the baby himself. Carlos is having none of that.

I Fell for Your Magic - 10k - 🔥

Charles had been the one to decide the sun rose and set with Carlos Sainz Jr. And it was Charles who had unexpectedly fallen in love with his teammate over the last couple years.

last night - 24k - ⭐️ 🔥

Rule #1: When you go to America, don't lose your virginity to your best friend's roommate. Charles fails Rule #1.

internal mechanics - 15k - ⭐️ 🔥

"Charles was with someone at the gym," Carlos hisses into the phone.

are we out of the woods yet? - 10k

Charles takes a few moments to consider it. It doesn’t sound like him at all. “So I really wanted it.” “Yes,” Carlos repeats, and then frowns. “Do you think–” His voice hardens just the slightest bit, leaning into… something that Charles can’t really place. “I didn’t make you do it.” Charles shifts away from him, staring at the other wall instead. “Of course. But anyway, I don’t know. I don’t remember it anyway.”

mind over matter is magic - 6k - ⭐️ 🔥

Carlos leaned on the side of the pool that overlooked Singapore at night. Arms crossed over the ledge — Carlos almost wanted to look down below. Feel the swoop in his stomach at the realization of how high up they were, relish on it. But, he rationalized, looking at Charles Leclerc usually had the same effect.

the hours i lost - 3k

Charles thinks he was foolish to be afraid of this, of Carlos. He thinks he was foolish to let himself get this far. He thinks he should have given in years ago. He thinks he’ll regret everything once he’s sober.

all the same old places - 13k - ⭐️

Charles stares at Carlos, then. Right at him. His eyes haven't changed, either. They're still the same shade of green - almost blue, even more so in the warm light of the sun. For reasons unknown, Carlos feels like smiling.

Pouring - 10k

At the age of ten, it's easy to talk about how his soulmate will be someone tall and certainly a brunette, because no one really knows what to expect until the moment they actually meet them.

Ballad of a Thin Place - 39k - ⭐️ 🔥

Thrust into the aristocracy after marrying a baronet's daughter, Charles, now a lord, struggles to adapt to the quiet life of an estate in the English countryside. Desperate for the connection and compassion that is lacking from his wife, he pursues a torrid affair with the handsome gamekeeper on their estate, a man who has a past he's trying to escape...

you bring me back to life - 1.8k

Charles said nothing, instead opting to ask him how he had been doing in his racing career. Arthur excitedly relayed everything that he could remember, from paddock gossip to results from race to race. It felt good to be surrounded by family. Not for the first time, he wished that he would have stayed. It is too late anyway. If he dwells on the past he’ll lose his present.

[unabashednightmarepizza]

Merula snyde x M/C (no gender)

Soulmate

It is impossible to lie to your destined soulmate.

𝑇ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝐼𝑠 𝑁𝑜 𝑈𝑠𝑒 𝐼𝑛 𝐿𝑦𝑖𝑛𝑔

Warning: Spoilers for the "Conjure a Patronus" and "Letter from Hogwarts" quests.

A/N: Damn, this took a long time for me to write for some reasons... Perhaps I have a difficult relationship with Merula, not knowing whether to love her or strangle her.

Prompts: I don't care what they say about me, loving you was really hard, I need somebody to hold me, and it's all for you from this

As little kids, people often thought about having their other half. Someone that was destined to be their one and only, decided by some higher power or whatever. Maybe the idea of someone being created just for them amazed them with the metaphysics of the whole system, or not having to seek love and fail over and over benefited them maybe.

Whatever the reason was, in a magical world like yours, it wasn't so unusual to hear such thing.

Most witches and wizards had their soulmate when they start the school, or work, since they spent most of their childhood and teenagehood in the school.

But you? No luck as of late.

It wasn't like you were actively seeking out to find whoever your soulmate was. All your focus was either on Quidditch, the Vaults and your brother, or...

The task given to you, right now.

There was already so much going on in your life, and you were just a teen, so many things that it made you often loose your appetite and just hang your head low while your head pounded.

Adding finding your soulmate and bringing whoever that person down with you into this shithole didn't seem fair to either one of you.

You just wanted... some peace of mind.

" What's that troubled look, Y/L/N? Spit it out."

You lifted your head to see Merula, your kind of enemy, looking at you with her usual snarky and mischievous eyes as a scoff left you. "Nothing, Merula. Why do you care?"

Merula smirked as she sat down in front of you, leaning the upper half of her body on the table as she looked at you with unreadable eyes.

At least for you.

If she wanted to be honest, Merula was in a very big dilemna. On one hand, you have been her enemy ever since you started school. She always bullied you and your friends, constantly duelled you only to be the one who was defeated... But none of them were what disturbed her, no.

It was the fact that they all made her left awestruck at your elegance, power and strength. And as if it wasn't enough, it also changed the beating of her heart too.

Soon, after she begrudginly accepted that "admiration" as the blonde Hufflepuff said, she had come to a frightening realization soon after you helped her with the whole Dementor case.

She couldn't lie to you, no matter how much she wanted or tried.

"You know how the saying that only those who are pure of heart can cast Patronuses?"

This was utterly so stupid and humiliating. At least for Merula. Her? The strongest witch admitting weakness? And as if it wasn't bad already, she couldn't lie to save her dignity?

To you, out of everyone?

Someone she bullied for as long as she could remember? Someone who probably hated her guts and might just do everything she did to them to her in return, and Merlin forbade it, much worse?

Yeah, that was the kind of luck she had.

You, a literal prodigy and the hero of Hogwarts, as her soulmate?

Fucking wild.

" I thought learning the Patronus Charm would let me prove that I'm not the same as my parents... But now that I'm close to achieving my goal, I'm not so sure if I want to know..." she continued and sighed out, relaxed a bit more now. She didn't lift her head to look at you or Tonks, she could already feel the shocked states you were giving her.

And suddenly, she felt like crying because one, you were her soulmate and two, she was being emotional in front of you and wanted you to hug her thightly.

And after the whole mess was over and she was looking at your expecting eyes, shining with a playfull beam, she considered to be... nicer to you, and get to know you better until she was ready to tell you that you were soulmates.

In her own special way.

"Thanks for saving me... both from the Dementor and from an answer I'm not ready for."

You gave her a soft, understanding smile. Hope for becoming friends blossoming in you for the first time.

"You are welcome, Merula.

Back to the present time, she looked at you shaken after you clicked your fingers before her eyes, worriedly looking at her since she never was this much silent. Because your sour expression is making me loose my appetite, that's why.... She wanted to say, snarky just like she normally was but instead...

" I saw that gloomy look on your face from across the hall and could tell you were wigging out about something..." was what left her mouth. It wasn't like her words wasn't sarcastic still, but considering the fact that she "hated" you, it was a shock to hear that the Merula Snyde was worried about you.

You eyed her curiously while gaping at her, completely surprised how she showed... care? Merula Snyde, the ever crude enemy of yours, being soft? Because of you?

You adjusted on your seat, shuffling a bit at your slightly faster heart. You couldn't lie that since the day you two met, she changed both physically and obviously, emotionally. She was much stronger than she was once, definetly had gotten taller and... more pretty.

At first, when you realized that she could be your potential soulmate, you flipped. Literally. Cursing at Merlin and the universe for suddenly throwing you in a cliché "enemies to lovers" trope while the Vaults and your brother was still a huge problem. The girl literally tried to kill you many times, though it might have not been her intention really, and more often than not, looked down at you or what you did. She was always so against you and what you did so why?

Why did she have to be your soulmate?

Merula looked at you anxiously when your eyes hardened, feeling uneasy for the first time like ever. Every minute you spent not answering her and looking into her eyes directly, she got even more anxious and also curious about what was going on through your head.

But she was Merula, and she couldn't show... care and worry. "So? What is it this time? Is there a dragon on loose in the castle and you haven't been able to duel it yet?"

A snort left you at her question, though you didn't hold back from rolling your eyes at her. "Well... It's not like that, obviously. Though it would be fun to see it and have you fight it just to prove me." You smiled softly at her as she widened her eyes at the burning feeling on her cheeks, and looked down shyly. Your heart stopped for a second at the bashfull girl that was sitting in front of you and not the "enemy" you had been dealing with for the past years. Your cheeks flushed and you looked around to see if anyone was watching you two, because Merlin knew it was near impossible for you two to sit still peacefully.

"I just..." you sighed tiredly and leaned back on your seat, taking the sight of Merula, your soulmate, with a heavy heart as you recalled your memories, or at least... tried to.

"I just try to remember my first magical moment, the first time I used magic... I know Jacob was there, we never were apart from each other." Your eyes glazed over, the missing feeling of your brother's disappearance still heavy on your heart.

Amd Merula, for the first time at seeing your face, felt bad about bullying you about him and his "potential death".

Everyone has been telling you to stop, before you also went mad like your brother, especially your parents. They didn't want their only child left to be striken with the same thing as their eldest, they didn't want to loose you too.

But... What if he was just waiting for you to help him? What if only you could help him?

" I know it's locked away somewhere in my head but I can't seem to recall it. I have been asking my friends about their own first time in hopes that it will shake something loose... But so far? Nothing..."

Well, the sight of the usual cheerful and happy you, being all sad... Didn't sit right with Merula and it definetly wasn't because her heart squeezed painfully in her chest as if she felt your pain as her own. What was this feeling of making you smile and annoy her at the same time? Why didn't she like that feeling on your face? Was she getting soft over you already? Did it... annoy her, being soft and loving and considerate, when it was you who she was involved with?

Nope, not at all.

She gulped her nerves down and looked at you for a second. They aren't some Dementor, they aren't gonna suck the life out of you.

"I... remember the first time I used magic."

Wait... Was she helping you?

You lifted your head slowly to look at her, watching as she was looking behind you to avoid your eyes.

" It left quite an impression on everyone involved." You gaped at her, shocked with your hand up in the air with the fork you held, surprised at her... words.

"Merula... Are you trying to help me?"

That made the red alarms go off in Merula's mind as her eyes widened and her cheeks flushed in a deep red color.

Oops, she caught me!

"O-Of course! I'm the Most Powerful Witch at Hogwarts, after all! And you wouldn't be able to get the job done, like... at all! And it's also natural that my origin story is something impressive!"

"And how do I know that you aren't lying?" You couldn't help but question, your words leaving your lips without your control. But you regretted them just the same when Merula's face fell and her eyes looked at you through her lashes sadly.

A sight that you never dreamed even in your wildest dream.

Just when she was opening up to you slowly, you had to go and ruin it, right Y/N?

"Why the hell would I lie to you?"

No, it was your imagination... Merula's voice didn't shake with disbelief at your question.

You shook your head in confusion, everything becoming overwhelming suddenly. "I don't know, Merula. When it comes to you, I don't know anything except you wanting to destroy me... I mean you lied to me when I was just 11 and made me a food for the Devil's Snare... You can't-"

"No matter how much I want to, I can't lie to you... Trust me, I tried."

That... was the bomb only she could drop. A bomb that threatened to ruin everything, one that could destroy whatever nice things she could do or say.

And though she hoped you didn't understand the heavy meaning behind her words, you did...

"You?"

One word, three letters, and the coldest rone you ever had... And soon, Merula's face twisted in anger and she bolted out of Hall, leaving you in shock as you tried to hold onto her shirt with your heart being dropped to your stomach.

"Merula, wait! I didn't mean to-"

But it was too late.

"What do you want, Y/L/N? I'm studying." You winced at the cold tone she used towards you, her eyes never leaving the page before her at the empty potions classroom. You didn't mean to sound so cold back then, in the Great Hall, but... you were just surprised.

Her? Your soulmate?

What kind of a romcom was this?

Besides, you thought she would never care about such thing, yet alone getting emotional over them...

Maybe you were more of a bad person for assuming so...

"You have been reading the same page for 5 minutes already... Do you think I'm deft enough to believe in that?" You leant over the pillar of the class with your arms crossed in front of your chest, with a soft yet sad smile on your face as she buried her face deeper into her book that she definetly wasn't reading anymore.

"Are you sure you want me to answer that question?" She slapped the book close as she teasingly, yet with a hint of anger which was justifiable, looked at you. You sighed guiltily as your arms fell and rubbed your temples with thight circles. You were already done with blaming yourself, you already felt like a total jackass for what you said, but Merula wasn't helping you fixing it either.

"Why are you so annoying... Merula, I'm trying to fix what I-"

"Then, don't bother! You made it pretty clear then how you saw it... saw me."

You sighed heavily as you sat down next to her, already feeling another headache coming. But you didn't care, if this was the last chance you had to have somewhat a happy future...

You had to fix this mess, the mess you created... Especially after witnessing how much this meant to her, how important it was for her to see you accept her.

"Look, Merula, you can keep avoiding the subject all you want," a scoff left her as she shook her head at you, disappointed with angry tears filling her eyes. Were you really going to scold her? Was she that much of not worthy for love?

What was she expecting anyways? That you would fall into her arms? Call her the love of your life? Her, who was the daughter of two death eaters? Who people saw as another potential one?

"But, contrary to what you might think right now, I'm not giving up on you, I'm not leaving you. So you might as well cooperate and talk to me."

Silence scretchted. One minute, two minutes... It was probably right before the third one ended that she spoke, finally gathering her courage.

"Why?"

"Why what?" You tilted your head in confusion, making her shake her head in disbelief at herself for feeling warm at your adorable curiosity.

"Why don't you give up on me? Clearly, I don't mean anything to you by your previous-"

"Merlin, just..! Let me explain myself, okay? No questions until the end. Once in your life, don't throw a snarky comment." You exclaim harshly, your hands flying up to either side of your face with your eyes shut in slight anger. Merula looked at you frozen, suddenly feeling hot all over her body at the intense eyes you were giving to her.

She nodded silently, a first for her, and nodded at you. You sighed nervously, suddenly aware of the weight of your next words would bring.

They would either be the start of something new, or be the reason why everything would go down for good.

You took a deep breath and dived in.

" My reaction from earlier wasn't because of disgust." Another scoff, met with your raised brows as Merula apologized silently. " I know it's hard to believe, especially when I acted like a true bitch. But... What I meant, what I wanted to just say was that..."

Damn, this is harder than I thought...

"Is that there was no possible way that someone like me was your soulmate. That's why I was like that..."

Merula was shocked. Actually that could be a understatement, because she never thought she would see the day that the usual confident you would sound so fragile and insecure of yourself.

Especially because of her... Because, wasn't she supposed to be the one who is insecure? Her parents were Death Eaters, in Azkaban, and pretty much everyone hates her in the school.

Meanwhile you had many friends, was the Quidditch captain and a prefect who was loved by many in the school. There were probably even some guys and girls who would die to be with you...

You had everything to offer to a possible lover, meanwhile she had nothing.

Why were you thinking like that?

Before she could talk and reassure both you and herself, you continued urgently, wanting to let everything go before she threw a "Depulso" or perhaps even more of a dangerous charm at you.

"Loving you was really hard, accepting it after many sleepless nights was even harder. Because I was scared of what others would think, what our families would think. And the fact that you hated me didn't help..."

"I don't care what they say about me, they can throw shit at me for all I care but you... You are the one good thing that might have happened to me in my short years, for now, and I don't want to... loose you."

She held your hand in a thight grasp between hers as she lifted your joined hands to your eyesight, pointing to them. She would show you all those silly worries of yours was pointless, that she was ready to do whatever it took to fight for you, for herself.

She would live for herself.

"This? This means I care about you, not I hate you. Even when we first met, I never hated you... Well, maybe a bit."

You both chuckled at her attempt to be smooth and you squeezed her hand back in response. You really wanted to believe in both of you, that you two could stand together until the very end...

But what if...

"But... How about our families? Continuing the line or whatever? What would others think-"

Merula sighed annoyed before she flicked your forehead almost in affection. That dumb head of yours is gonna be the reason of your end...

"I just need someone to hold me, Y/L/N..." she said sternly. " Love me without any conditions, any expectations. And... If some fate decided that it was you who would do it, I'm fine with it." She looked down to where your hands were resting on the table in deep thoughts before she gingerly smiled after so long.

"I don't need the money, fame or anything... Though I realized it late. I know I'm rough around the edges but all the love, care, softness and tenderness I have left... It's all for you, they are all yours."

Those dumb romance books really worked...

Wow, I... I never thought Merula had such a romantic side... There is no reason to doubt her.

"Okay." You said breathless, nodding in happiness.

"Okay?" Merula asked in confusion at how easily you... accepted her. Maybe, she shouldn't have made fun of you for being so accepting with everyone else.

"Yeah... Sorry for being an arsehole in the Hall."

She laughed freely at your sheepish look, and you basked in it. She is even more pretty when she laughs...

Behind that laugh though, laid Merula's biggest fear. Now that you two clarified everything... There was only one thing left to do.

"Then... Wouldyougooutwithme?" She hurriedly asked, not wanting the embrassment of asking you out take over her completely. At first, you stood shocked at your seat, not expecting her to talk so fast. And Merula thought it meant rejection, that it was too soon, but you understood her perfectly.

Perhaps what others told you was true: You and Merula were much more alike than neither one of you thought.

"Merula..." you smiled softly at her, " I'd love to go out with you." She was finally able to breathe normally as relief took over and then her mind started to wander. Where to take you...

Black Lake? No, too silent. Hogsmeade? You teo could sit at the teashop and then buy candy and eat it later on the train.

Yes, that was okay... What?

In a spur of moment, you shyly kissed her cheek and bolted out of the class, but not before whispering to her "I can't wait, Merula. For whatever you plan."

Huh..? Well, maybe soulmates weren't that overrated after all, if they gave suxh pure happiness to even the coldest looking girl Hogwarts had ever seen.

[stevesbestgirl]

Dreamweaver

Dream of the Endless x f!Reader

Warnings: mentions of depression, a few curses, briefly mean!Morpheus, soulmate tattoo bs, I took liberties with the lore

A/N: I started this forever ago when I was dealing with some stuff with my brother, so if it feels like a self-insert 🤷‍♀️ (no descriptions of reader's appearance)

5775 words

"Dream."

Lord Morpheus, also known as Dream of the Endless, raised his head from his desk, where he was pouring over a book.

"Dream!"

He heaved a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose before standing.

"Dream of the Endless, I hold your sigil and I call to you."

"Yes Death, I am on my way to my gallery as we speak."

"Forget your gallery, come here."

Morpheus suppressed a sigh. But with a sound suspiciously like the flutter of a raven's feathers, Dream disappeared from his library, appearing instead beside his sister. Death's gaze did not waver; she appeared to be watching a young pair seated on a mattress on the floor of a simple bedroom. One, a young woman, seemed to be comforting the other, a young man with enough resemblance to be a sibling.

Dream spared only a quick glance, "Why am I here, sister?"

Death finally tore her gaze from the two mortals, "Can't you see it?"

Morpheus watched the pair again, unsure of what he was supposed to be seeing.

"Maybe I'm just bad. That's why she left." Dream could see the wisps of despair puffing up around the boy, evaporating like drops of water on a hot pan.

"You took the fall when I broke Mallory's lamp when we were ten. Don't tell me you're bad," the woman insisted despite her soft tone. "And nothing you did made Bella leave."

"Yeah, I guess so."

Dream's gaze swiveled back to his sister, "I am unsure what it is I should be seeing."

Death huffed impatiently, "Open your mind for just one moment and consider that a mortal may surprise you." When he still stared at her, his jaw growing tight with impatience, she rolled her eyes, "She's dream weaving, Dream. You of all people should be able to tell."

"The dream weavers died out hundreds of years ago."

Death grabbed her stubborn brother by the shoulder, twisting him to face the girl again, "Watch."

Dream watched, albeit a bit disdainful, as the young woman continued to speak. She offered musings about their past. Their childhood seemed to have been a difficult one. But she made jokes, reminiscing and reflecting on what they could learn- how they could create better for themselves. And then he saw it.

Human consciousness, all consciousness really, clung to the Dreaming with tethers. Needless to say, humans clung particularly closely compared to most other sentient life. Each dream, though they varied in strength, was a connection to the dreaming. When a being began to lose the will to live, those tethers weakened.

Her brother's tethers were weak; not quite on the brink of severing, but looking rather exhausted. And while it wasn't possible for her to strengthen the tethers- only their owner could do that, she was reinforcing their connection to the Dreaming. The dreams she was sharing were indeed woven into an intricate web, right on the cusp of his realm.

Her own web was vast, ethereal silver glimmering in elaborate knots and designs, each one a waking dream. This girl's very existence was tied up in his realm.

His only show of emotion was a small parting of his lips, but that was enough for Death. "I told you so."

Dream said nothing, watching the girl speak.

"What are you thinking, brother?" Death prompted, clearly awaiting some kind of response.

"It appears that a new age of Dreamweavers may be upon us, sister."

"Are you going to speak to her?"

"I suppose I am duty-bound to make contact. Soon, more like her will appear, if they haven't already. If they go on unsupervised, they could damage the realm."

Death cocked an eyebrow, "Why do you sound so reluctant? You've never had issue with dream weavers in the past, have you?"

"Not yet. But I have an odd feeling about this one."

*

After departing with Death, Morpheus tasked Matthew with keeping an eye on the girl. She stayed with her brother through the night, the pair of them departing early in the morning and returning a short while later with what appeared to be a third sibling.

Only once the two young men were in each other's company did the girl leave, returning to her own home a short distance away.

She seemed lost in her own thoughts as she puttered around the house, cleaning up odds and ends before changing into a tee-shirt and climbing into bed. Underneath her eyes, dark circles were beginning to swell. She was exhausted.

Morpheus almost felt bad for her; this sleep would not be as restful as she might be expecting.

*

Y/N always had vivid dreams, both waking and while asleep. But she immediately knew tonight was different. Dressed in nothing but her tee-shirt and underwear, her bare feet were chilled against the dark stone floor underfoot.

A shadowed figure sat in a throne at the head of the large room, as though waiting for her.

"Hello?" She took a hesitant step forward, hands clinging to the too-short hem of her tee-shirt, which was barely covering the tops of her thighs.

"Approach, Y/L, L/N."

She did as the voice instructed, stepping forward on unsteady legs. It was male, authoritative and nearly stern. But it wasn't aggressive, or even raised in volume. He simply spoke and expected compliance.

It was also beautiful, deeply toned and unrushed in its delivery. He had an accent she couldn't identify, her mind reeling with thoughts as she approached the throne, still cloaked in shadow.

She felt exposed, painfully aware of his gaze on her. She gave her shirt another nervous tug down, trying to make sure she was covered. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she asked, "What is this place?"

The silence stretched, her fingers abandoning the hem of her shirt in favor of fidgeting with the cuticles of her fingernails. But her hands parted hastily and she sucked in a gasp as she suddenly found herself fully clothed in a pair of dark jeans, socks, boots, and a black jacket over her tee-shirt.

She was relieved for both the privacy and warmth granted by the clothes, but her heart was pounding at the magic, "Am I dreaming?"

The figure remained in shadow, "Yes," he confirmed. "But more importantly, you are in the Dreaming."

She blinked, willing her eyes to make out the figure in the dark as questions bubbled up inside her, "And that would make you-?"

He rose slowly from his chair, towering over her at his full height, somehow still shrouded in shadow, "I am Dream of the Endless, creator of the Dreaming, King of Nightmares."

It suddenly became quite clear to her as she gazed up at him that he wanted her to be intimidated. The question of why still loomed.

"King of Dreams then too, right?" She couldn't find it within herself to give him the reaction he wanted, king or no king.

His voice remained level, "Yes."

"Am I forbidden from laying eyes on the King of Dreams?" She cocked her eyebrow, only slightly, in a challenge. She took a step backwards, inviting him to step into the light.

There was another long pause before he answered, "No, you are not." But instead of moving, the shadows seemed to loosen, pale skin blooming behind the darkness until his face was wholly visible.

It seemed the perfect match for his voice, slim with sharp cheekbones and a shock of deep ebony hair. Long, dark lashes framed his eyes, which were dark, almost entirely black in a way that should have been eerie. But they glimmered like stars, little specks of light dancing deep within their depths and seeming to invite her inside. She felt as though she was falling forward until the darkness swallowed her up.

But inside was far from dark. It was a massive stretch of blackness, yes, but far from nothing. The black was a canvas, swirling with color and light and looking like entire galaxies.

A mess of incoherent thought washed over her, driving her own thoughts from her mind. The galaxy showed her a beautiful woman. She felt insecurity, fear, but also something warm and safe she could only describe as love. Then she saw the sun, but the sun as she'd never seen it before. The sun through the eyes of someone who couldn't go blind. And then came pain, rejection, grief-

"You should not be here."

Then she was back in the throne room, balled up on the floor, her cheeks wet with tears. She sat up, hastily wiping her cheeks, but Dream was already hauling her up by the shoulder of her tee-shirt, her extra layer of clothing stripped away in an instant, "You dare to invade my mind?" His dulcet tones were reduced to a mere hiss. "As the King of Dreams, it is my responsibility to warn you that if you or others like you meddle in the affairs of my realm, it will cost you dearly. It seems that every time I show compassion to a human, you are determined to make me regret it. Cross my path again and you will not receive such mercy a second time."

She wanted to plead with him, to make him understand that it had been an accident. She didn't even understand what she'd done- were those his thoughts?

His change in demeanor stung more than it should have. But his sudden rage combined with what little she'd seen made it clear he would not leave himself vulnerable to her, and perhaps for good reason.

"I apologize for any offense, it was not my intent. I will do my best not to get in your way again." She offered him a sad smile, "And I'm sorry for your suffering."

His eyes glimmered in a brooding smolder and then she found herself jolting awake in her bed, a sheen of sweat glittering on her skin. She made a half-hearted attempt to tell herself it had only been a dream, but there was no denying what she'd seen- what she'd felt.

She felt out of place going back to her everyday life, but her work wouldn't wait for her. And there was plenty left to do for her brother, so she put it behind her, hoping that whatever she had done to draw the King of Dreams' ire was a one-time thing. Their interaction had left a lingering bad taste in her mouth.

She had hoped that her responsibilities would drive the memory from the front of her consciousness, but it continued to creep up on her each time she had a moment to breathe, haunting her rare moments of rest with nightmares. She suspected the King of Nightmares was wholly capable of sentencing her to a lifetime of nighttime terrors, but she wasn't convinced this was his intention. But if she was connected to Dream, as he'd called himself, the only way to fix it would be to visit the Dreaming again.

And now she was thinking about it again. She gave herself a shake; she had another long night ahead of her. So she turned up the music in her car and left for her brother's apartment.

*

"I thought I might see you back here, brother." Death looked smug as Dream appeared beside her in the same place they'd watched from last time.

"And why are you here again, Death?"

"To catch you in the act, obviously."

Dream made a disapproving noise at her joke, but didn't press further. He watched as she and her brother played a video game together. He'd done some reading in her book after her uninvited foray into his mind, though mostly out of spite. It had done nothing to reassure him that he'd acted appropriately.

Her childhood had not been an easy one. Teenage parents, poverty, and drug use had rendered her functional guardian to her two younger siblings at a young age. Once he arrived at the abuse resulting from her first romantic relationship, he'd stopped reading.

The two Endless watched for quite some time before speaking again, but surprisingly to Death, it was Dream who broke the silence. "Why are you truly here, sister?"

"It is part of my responsibilities to check on the humans whose ties grow weak."

"Do you spend this long on every one?"

She huffed a sigh, "No." Stealing a glance at Y/N, she admitted, "When she weaves the dreams, that strengthens the connection, giving a weak tie more time to recover."

Dream tipped his head, "Yes, as you explained last time."

"I'm starting to suspect that the dream she's woven around the center tether may be permanent."

"Is such a thing possible?"

"I don't know. Like you said, this could be a new kind of dream weaver." They both watched her laugh, drawing a laugh from her brother as well. "I wish I could just ask her what she's capable of."

Dream looked back on the way the girl had collapsed in his throne room, realization making his stomach sink, "She is unaware of her abilities."

"As far as I can tell." At Dream's silence, Death glanced at him sharply, "Why do I get the sense that you may have done something foolish?"

Dream was silent, reassessing his interaction with this new information. He'd brought her into his realm, exposed and confused, then put on a show of being intimidating and immediately lost his temper, resorting to threats and expulsion.

He refused to feel shame over actions taken to protect his realm, but he couldn't identify the strange pit that seemed to have opened in his gut. She likely thought him a monster, a nightmare himself instead of their king.

"Dream, what did you do?"

Death's voice broke him from his stupor, though he kept his gaze on the girl, "I brought her to my realm and lost my temper."

Death couldn't suppress an eye roll, but Dream didn't seem to notice, "What was it this time?"

"I suspect one of those new abilities allows her access to memory."

There was a long pause. "She got inside that thick skull of yours?"

Dream broke his gaze to send his sister a scathing look, "Yes."

Death sent her an appraising glance, "She seems to be holding up rather well, all things considered." It was meant to be a joke, but Dream thought the circles under her eyes were damning.

"You are typically far slower to admit you are wrong, so I ask you again, brother, what are you doing here?"

"After my meeting with the girl, I spent an entire evening working on new dreams and nightmares. It was the best work I've done in ages."

Now Death did smirk, "She inspired you then? Is she your latest muse?"

"My days of muses are behind me, sister. Aside from the fact that she is a mortal, my realm needs my full attention."

"Of course, brother."

*

That night, when Y/N fell asleep in her bed, she found herself back in the throne room. Muttering a curse under her breath, she stood, grateful that she'd slept in a pair of shorts this time.

"Approach, Y/N."

She did not obey the voice this time, stubbornly remaining in place and gazing resolutely into the dim light, which was only slightly improved from her first visit.

A moment, then two, passed before there came a sigh. "Very well." Several long strides later the King of Dreams had left his throne to stand before her. She avoided his eyes, afraid to repeat her mistakes.

"Dream King."

"Yes, I suppose I deserve that as well."

Tipping up her chin, she nodded, "You do." She seemed to catch herself, "I'm afraid I'm not sure what I did to end up back here."

"I brought you here- in both instances. You've done nothing wrong, I have realized too late."

She was stunned. She hesitantly met his gaze, relieved when her feet remained planted on the floor.

Dream held his expression steady and nodded, "I apologize for my prior behavior."

She surprised herself by tipping her head, "Thank you." She chewed her lip for a moment, "I'm sorry too. For before. I'm really not sure how I did it."

She knew she didn't have the leverage to flaunt a grudge against the Kind of Dreams. She was pleased with her own politeness, but she would not trust easily.

Dream was silent for a long pause, "What exactly did you see?"

She looked away, "Not much. A woman- a beautiful woman. The sun. And I felt-" His eyes seemed to pull her gaze back in, "I felt some of your pain, I think."

"I apologize."

Her brow furrowed, "For your suffering?"

He shook his head, "For yours, at my hands. We have much to discuss, but you will not struggle with nightmares from tonight on."

The corner of her mouth twitched upwards in a smile, "So, I can rest assured?"

Dream either didn't catch the pun or was ignoring it, nodding, "You may. Now come, have a seat." He led her back toward his throne, where a small tea table and a wooden chair sat on the dais beside his own.

She waited, watching him take his seat on the throne before she sat on the wooden chair, ruefully thinking of her own chair at home. And then it was her chair she was sitting in. No sound or movement accompanied the change, it simply was.

Dream raised an eyebrow, as if challenging the action, "Did you just alter the Dreaming?"

Face flushing with warmth, she stumbled over her words, "Not with intention."

His gaze seemed inquisitive, "Have you always manipulated the Dreaming so skillfully?"

She raised a brow, a reluctant smile forming at the corner of her mouth, "I'm not sure that was a compliment."

"Simply an observation."

"Sounds a bit sinister though, doesn't it? 'Manipulating the Dreaming.'"

"What would you call it if someone were to create their own clay sculpture on a block already used by someone else?" Dream wasn't offended by the action so much as he was curious.

"If it serves a new function, I would call it repurposing," she replied thoughtfully.

There was a long pause, "Indeed." She couldn't decipher his tone. "What if I told you that the person who made the original sculpture also created the clay? And that the only clay that would ever exist was his creations."

She sobered up a little, "I'm sorry if I've ruined your work. Once again, not my intention. I have a lot to learn about your realm."

His gaze trailed over the chair she'd conjured, noting the details. The golden colored thread in the stitching that glinted in the dim light of the throne room. The slight wear to the fabric around the arms. Dreams were often vague, even half-formed, because mortals struggled to shape the Dreaming. But Dream suspected he'd find a perfect match to this chair if he were to visit her home.

"Clay is never ruined for having been used for creation. However, some do not take kindly to their working being- repurposed. But that is what I brought you here to discuss."

She gave him a nod, "I'm listening."

His dark gaze seemed to pierce her, "You are something known as a dream weaver. Historically, dream weavers used their abilities to tether many humans to the same dream."

She blinked at him, expression blank for a long time, "I don't mean any disrespect, but could you be mistaken?"

"I could be, but my sister is almost certainly not."

"Your sister?"

"Death."

She shook her head, trying to clear the thoughts that had grown thick and slow.

"Why would you want humans to have the same dreams?"

"Back in the early days of human development, human dreams were chaotic and disorganized. Dream weavers helped drive human development by uniting many humans under the same dream."

"Dreams affect human development?"

That drew a surprising chuckle from the Dream King, "Dreams are human development. The world exists as it is because of dreams- because of the Dreaming." There was a marked note of pride in his voice at that.

"Everything?"

"Everything."

"So like, the depths of the ocean and all the scary stuff down there was all dreamed up by humans?" He nodded. "What about space- the entire greater solar system? Is any of that real?"

"Created by dreams, but very real." She took a moment to process that, stifling a sigh. "You are displeased?" Dream raised a curious brow.

"That's a very human-centric reality. I kind of liked it when we were just little specks of dust among the vastness of the uncharted cosmos."

The corner of his mouth lifted in almost a smile, "You still are. But only because humans have dreamed it so."

"How have we survived this long? It seems to me that human beings have a tendency to destroy more than we create."

"Humans can be very destructive. But they are also very clever. No other species has demomstrated such an capability to dream up solutions to its problems like humans."

"So like, climate change. The solution to all of the pollution, to the whole climate crisis, exists?"

"Not exactly. It may or may not exist now. But it could exist if enough humans were to dream of it."

She rested her head in her palm, forcing a breath; she was starting to get light headed. This was overwhelming. Her next breath did not come as easily as the first, a fact not unnoticed by the Dream King.

"Are you alright?"

"I-" she swallowed hard, trying to get past the lump in her throat, "I think I'm having a panic attack."

Dream calmly reached out and brushed his hand over her forehead, his intent to soothe her distress. Instead, a sharp spike of heat burst through his palm, quickly going icy. He heard her gasp, but couldn't tear his gaze away as the trails of ice left behind dark lines of deep purple criss-crossing over his wrist.

"What the fuck?" Her voice was barely over a whisper, the only evidence of distress the high-pitched strain that overtook her tone. Tearing his eyes from his hand, he saw the same design decorating her hand in a blue so dark it was almost black.

Her wide-eyed gaze flicked up to his, "Did you-" She left the question unfinished, not wanting to make an accusation and unsure of what to ask even if she did.

"No."

"Do you know what this is?"

"No." His voice had gone cold and hard, just like it had been their first time meeting. Her eyes flicked back to the lines marking her skin and Dream saw the panic begin to rekindle in them.

After only a split second of hesitation, he pressed his palm to her forehead again, "Sleep, now. We will speak again soon."

Her eyes grew cloudy, but she fought against his magic with surprising vigor, "No- the- n-nightmares-"

Dream's hand seemed to slide down over her cheek to cup her face of its own accord as her eyes started to glisten with fear, "You will suffer no bad dreams tonight, Dreamweaver."

And as she faded from his realm, her consciousness joining her body in sleep, Death's words about the girl's resilience to seeing inside his head echoed again. But the lines swirling over his wrist stretched from his fingertips all the way up his forearm, nearly to the elbow, demanding his attention. They were delicate, weaving together and knotting at the crossroads between, like a tangle of flower stems and intricate lace. And at the apex of it all, the palm of his hand had an empty circle at the center.

As he stared at the mark on his hand, Dream of the Endless felt something he was neither accustomed to or fond of- he felt lost.

*

"You look like a kicked puppy today, brother," Death remarked, not breaking pace on her way to the next destination. The city street seemed to blur behind her, though her pace appeared normal. Dream's long strides quickly made up the distance, though he said nothing.

Death's raised eyebrow slowly lowered as she noticed the markings on his hand. "It appears that congratulations are in order."

The frown lines on his face only seemed to grow more pronounced.

"Unless-"

"Unless." Dream was unamused.

"Unless you are not pleased to have found your soulmate."

If he were mortal, those words might have rung in his ears, the vibrations enough to make everything he'd known crumble. But they were not enough because he was not mortal and he did not have a soulmate.

"You believe such foolishness, sister?"

"You are so confident it is foolish with the evidence staring you right in the face?"

"This?" He raised his right hand, "This is not evidence. I have never encountered such delusion in any text or reading-"

"And you will not. But if you sought out the people who can remember the farthest back in human history, they would remember."

"If it is so certain, why is it not documented?" Dream sounded annoyed that it was becoming more difficult to be skeptical.

"It is. But it has been changed in writings, splintered and embellished, transformed into something not quite the same. They never quite get it right. But they dream of it. Surely you have seen that."

"I have. Yet I have never met a mortal with markings like this."

Death suppressed a chuckle at his determination to disprove her theory, "I myself have not seen a soul mate marking in a long time. But they exist. I suspected as soon as you'd told me the girl got in your head."

"I suppose that was a sign as well," he mused bitterly.

"Yes, it was. Why are you so determined not to believe, Morpheus? You aren't usually the type to ignore evidence. I thought you would be happy."

"Happy at a cruel joke? Even if I accepted this as truth, it is clearly the result of Desire's interference once again."

Death shook her head, "Soul mates go even beyond Desire."

"Then why is my soul mate a human?" he demanded. "Am I meant to destroy human-kind in my pursuit of happiness, sister?" He knew he was being unfair, demanding such answers from his sister, but he would not allow her to light the hope inside him. He would not have what he wanted, that much he knew.

"Of course you aren't. I don't have all the answers, Dream. But be patient. They will make themselves clear over time."

That was not what he wanted to hear. "Thank you, sister. I must go." And he did, leaving Death alone just as a sigh fell from her lips.

*

All day long, Y/N got remarks about the lines twisting up her wrist. After a night of blissfully peaceful sleep, she woke up feeling refreshed, taking a moment to examine the designs that had followed her from her dreams.

The lines had filled in more since while she slept. What had been dainty lines had thickened to nearly an eighth of an inch- she'd measured. What was more, the deep, rich blue that had made up the original color was deeper now, with glimmers of royal purple, black, and the occasional glint of something golden- like a raven's wings.

The lines seemed to connect at every possible juncture. The empty circle at the heart of her palm seemed like the center, although she didn't quite understand why.

There was a lot she didn't understand; why did she have a tattoo at all? It wasn't exactly normal to wake up with new ink. And based on the Dream King's reaction, it was also not normal for ancient royalty to find themselves with a flash tattoo. But she would hopefully get more answers tonight.

She was embarrassed- mortified actually, at the way she'd freaked out last night. But she had to go back. He'd called her a Dreamweaver, whatever that meant.

But when she climbed into bed that night, she tossed and turned, anxious thoughts keeping her mind active. She felt a strange sense of trepidation whenever she visited the Dreaming; she wasn't exactly in a hurry to piss off the Dream King any more than she already had at their first meeting. But more concerning than the shadow of fear was the sliver of excitement at the prospect of seeing him again.

Despite her efforts to convince herself it was the remnants of the dream, muddling her emotions, even now she could feel his pull. She could practically feel him waiting for her on the other side of her consciousness. And when she finally did drift off to sleep, she never reached a state of rest.

Instead, she found herself seated in the chair she had left behind the night before in the throne room of what she presumed was the Dream Castle. Dream was waiting for her, his throne no longer shrouded in shadow. In fact, the whole throne room was warm and well-lit, her breath catching as she gazed around at the stunning architecture.

"Did you sleep well?" Dream's voice broke her stupor, somehow managing to catch her off guard.

"What?" Her head snapped to the throne, where he was waiting.

She watched the corner of his mouth curl up in a faint smirk, "You were concerned about nightmares, if I recall."

"Oh. No- yes, I um, slept fine." She wasn't sure why she was so flustered.

Dream let out a low hum, "Excellent."

She wasn't sure what to say, especially since Dream hadn't seemed to be in the best temper when she'd been here last. She had questions, starting with what had happened to her arm and ending with what the hell it actually meant to be a Dreamweaver.

"I'm sure you have questions."

She nodded, "A couple, yes."

"I will answer to the best of my ability."

Though her gaze lingered on the marks on her arm, the words that came out were, "What do I need to know about being a Dreamweaver?"

Dream was pensive before answering, "You must remember that the Dreaming, no matter how it responds to you, is my realm. What I say goes." You had to consciously suppress the shiver that wanted to rattle you at the intense way he held your gaze while he spoke.

She nodded, "You mentioned others- who may not take kindly to my abilities."

That elicited another pause, "That question leads to many more questions. Rest assured, I will provide an overview on my siblings, but not tonight."

She bit back the torrent of follow-ups and asked instead, "Are there more like me?"

He gave his head a solemn shake, "There were a great many Dreamweavers at one point in time. But eventually they stopped emerging and died out."

"No immortality then, I take it?" She was only joking, but he shook his head seriously. She suddenly felt shy meeting his eyes, "Are you immortal?"

He cocked his head like he was determining her intentions, "Not as you might think. I am not mortal- I do not age, grow old, or die by natural causes. Though it is exceedingly difficult, I can be killed."

The silence seemed to stretch as she processed what she had just learned. Everything should have seemed overwhelming- she shouldn't believe it. But she could feel the truth of it.

Finally, she held up a clenched fist, her eyes on the dark lines glistening in the light, "What is this?"

Dream was silent for so long that she almost asked again, but he finally said softly, "It is a soul bond."

Her gaze flicked to his eyes; the dancing lights there seemed to be waiting for her reaction. Then it fell to his own left hand, where the matching lines seemed so much more elegant on his pale skin.

"What does that mean?" She asked even though she already suspected.

"I do not know." That caught her off guard; she expected him to know everything. He certainly seemed to know more than she did.

She surprised him by asking, "Is there anything you want to ask me?"

He'd expected her to push for more information. "Have you always had these abilities?"

She offered a chagrined smile, "I didn't even know I had abilities, to be honest."

"You are quite skilled."

He made a vague hand gesture and she wasn't sure what he'd done. Then she caught a glimpse of light above her head, her mouth falling open at the intricate web of silvery white that seemed to hover over her head. She didn't quite understand how she had created this masterpiece of dreams, but she believed him.

It took her a moment to realize that he had paid her a compliment, "Oh- thank you." Her face felt a bit hot. "I have another question." At his nod, she continued, "Will I see you again?"

She couldn't explain it, since his eyes were so difficult to read, but he seemed pleased as he mulled that over, "You are not bound to me; you are free to go back to your life. But should you have need of the Dreaming, it is always here. I trust you can make your way back."

She couldn't place why she felt as though he were flirting with her; he clearly avoided expressing any kind of desire to see her again of his own volition.

She felt the urge to admit she wanted to see him again, grateful to her own good sense for stopping her before the words formed. Dream hadn't spelled out what kind of being he was to her, but she knew he was likely high above whatever a 'soul bond' meant. He was the definition of being out of someone's league.

So she nodded her head, "Thank you, Dream King."

A beat of silence. "Morpheus. You may call me Morpheus."

Her lips curled into a half-smile, "Thank you, Morpheus."

He wasn't prepared for how his name sounded when spoken from her lips. She wasn't prepared for the soft smile that graced his handsome face. Even solemn, he was beautiful. But a smile, faced directly at her- because of her- it was like knowing the sun was shining because of her.

She was so unprepared that she blinked, waking up in her own bed, her heart beating rapidly in her chest. A wave of emotions washed over her; loss, frustration, hope, longing. She felt desperate to fall back asleep, to see that smile grace Morpheus' face again. But if that was going to happen, she would have to go to him.

[navnae]

Steddie Soulmate AU Part 2

Part 1

Prompt: a clock counts down until you meet your soulmate

Prompt from @phantypurple !!! ❤️

Read on AO3

Additional tags: @beckkthewreck @cherixxx69 @iwouldsail

-

If you would’ve asked Eddie years ago about how he felt about the whole soulmate phenomenon he would tell you that he believes it’s all bullshit but now if you were to ask him…

He’d say the same thing, he thinks it’s bullshit.

Eddie wasn’t a person who did relationships and he didn’t believe in the myth of a clock stopping as soon as you meet your so called ‘soulmate’. When he was little Wayne gave him the tiny clock that he carries in his pocket at all times. Only Wayne could convince him to still have faith in that thing after so many failed attempts at trying to piece together who would be his other half. Of course as Eddie got older he realized that girls weren’t the only ones catching his eye and he figured out that he was attracted to guys too, which made his journey a lot harder. His soulmate literally could’ve been anyone in passing and he wouldn’t have noticed because he stopped checking his clock years ago. During high school Gareth and Jeff encouraged him to give the clock another shot even if he wasn’t fully on board with it yet, out of curiosity and a little bit of desperation he listens to them. Throughout the year he focused on every encounter he had with everyone and immediately after he would check the clock only to see it still counting down. With the constant checking of the clock he did daily slowly Eddie started to have his doubts again, essentially pushing it to the back of his mind.

A few days went by and Eddie was completely thrown off by Chrissy Cunningham, in his eyes ‘The Queen’ of Hawkins High, asking him for drugs. Obviously he was shocked by the whole thing but Eddie has never been the kind of person to turn down a customer who’s willing to pay for his services even if it so happened to be the head of the cheerleading squad. They met in the woods to discuss what he had and somehow they ended up talking about things other than drugs. Eddie knew that Chrissy has always been a kind person but he hasn’t talked to her in awhile, the last time being when they were in middle school. So it really did shock him that she stayed the same no matter what her status was and for a split second Eddie almost forgot about what they were there for in the first place. Foolishly Eddie started to develop a crush on her in the middle of their conversation which was really stupid considering that she found her soulmate in Jason then he also had to realize, then being together wouldn’t be realistic. After they finished discussing the details of where the transaction was taking place a time was set up and they quickly parted ways. Out of curiosity Eddie pulled the tiny clock out of his pocket just to see if anything changed, maybe there could be a chance that Chrissy had two soulmates or he was just starting to become desperate at this point. He looked a the clock and to no surprise it was counting down still. Eddie didn’t know why but it bummed him that his soulmate was out there somewhere and he had no idea who it could be. He thought about it for a few more seconds before wiping it out of his head, he didn’t have time to look for the person he’s destined to be with. Eddie focused on making money tonight and that was all.

Eddie went back to school to finish up the plans that he had for the evening and that involved a dnd game with his new friends Dustin and Mike, they even brought along a friend of theirs named Erica. At first Eddie was skeptical about letting a new member play especially when she looked like she was in the fourth grade, okay he kind of bumped her age down a little far but she was still younger than all of them. After hearing her vouch for herself and explaining her move set Eddie had no choice but to let her play, she knew her stuff. They played the game like normal and everyone was having a good time. Eddie really played up the theatrics that night, anything he could do to get everyone on the edge of their seat and anticipation running through their veins. Truly an exciting night for him as the game was coming to an end. Eddie said his goodbyes to the group and prepared himself for what the future had in store for him. Earlier Chrissy agreed to coming over to his house so they could settle everything that they talked about in the woods. When they arrived to Eddie’s trailer he kept in mind that she requested for something stronger, at the time that should’ve sent alarms through Eddie’s head but money is one hell of a drug ironically. He went to look for one of the strongest drugs he had in his room basically being in his own world while the worst has yet to come. Eddie smiled from ear to ear after finding what needed and head back to where Chrissy was. His eyes laid on Chrissy, his smile dropping in an instant.

Eddie saw her shaking in the middle of his living room while her eyes fluttered, they were whiter and had no sign of life in them. He panicked as he tried to shake her awake then calling out to her hoping that he’ll get a response. The lights in his trailer flickered before Eddie saw Chrissy levitate in the air making him stumble back until he fell on the floor. His heart started pounding in his chest at the sight of a girl he knew under whatever this evil trance was and he couldn’t save her. Within seconds Eddie watched Chrissy’s body break right in front him, he screamed at the top of his lungs with tears in his eyes as he’d body fell to the ground and she was already gone in that exact moment. Eddie was terrified and he knew if he stayed any longer that he would be next. He ran away without looking back, little did he know that all of it was going to bite him in the ass. When the news got on the story about Chrissy’s death every finger was pointing in Eddie’s direction. He had to lay low because Hawkins wanted him dead or alive it didn’t matter which one but if you were to ask the people they were prefer that he was dead. He traveled as far as he could to get away from the town that hates him, a boathouse that he found seemed like the perfect place to get away and hide. He made himself semi comfortable in one of the boats then covered himself up with a tarp that was lying around.

At some point during the night Eddie had fallen asleep because he jumped once he heard the sound of faint voices and footsteps coming towards him. They were muffled to him, none of the voices sounded familiar.

Eddie flinched at the feeling of something hard against his side and repeatedly he kept getting hit with it. Whoever it was wouldn’t stop causing him to panic once again. He thought if he was going to die anyways he might as well put up a fight. The hard object hit his side one last time before Eddie jumped onto his feet and revealing himself to whoever was there. He didn’t know who was standing in front of him but the first thing he did was grab them by the shoulders and aggressively pushed them against a wall making sure that every move to he did wasn’t gentle. He heard screaming in the process of him standing his ground, everything got drowned out since he was under the impression that he was in danger. Eddie managed to focus on the person who kept poking him in the side and he almost let out a laugh at who it was.

Steve Harrington.

Looking like a deer in headlights when Eddie had a broken beer bottle in his hand and he was inches away from his neck. Eddie never talked to Steve at school because there was never a reason to. He was a shitty person, so if he did come here to hurt him Eddie wouldn’t have felt anything if he just so happened to press the beer bottle against his neck. Eddie snapped out of his thoughts at the sound of Dustin’s voice trying to calm him down. All of them were telling him that they wasn’t going to harm him in anyway and Dustin promised that everything would be okay. It wasn’t like Eddie didn’t believe Dustin, it was just he’s always shined this positive light on Steve that honestly sounded like lies to him. Eddie looked at Dustin before narrowing his eyes at Steve who clearly wanted to be anywhere else but here. After a few extremely long seconds Eddie let him go and took a seat, for now he’ll keep it to himself that he doesn’t trust Steve. Something felt off about him and Eddie couldn’t explain why, he got a weird feeling in his stomach when Steve was close to him. Eddie brushed it off and watched Dustin make his way over to him with concern on his face. He told them everything about what happened to Chrissy including how the way she was killed wasn’t normal and it was almost like a supernatural thing. He waited for them to laugh or make fun of him but that never happened, they comforted him through this trauma that he was going though. Eddie’s eyes became glossy after talking to them and the way they swore that he would get out of this mess made him feel hopeful, he’s never felt that before. Dustin told him that they would be back in the morning to get him then they left swiftly. Eddie had so many thoughts in his head that he didn’t have a clear one that stood out to him. The boathouse was eerie when no one was around and he hated that every so often the wind would blow sending chills down his spine. To keep his mind off of those things he thought he could check his clock to see if it changed, Eddie pulled it out of his pocket while having low expectations.

00:00

Eddie shook his head repeatedly as he processed the numbers on the clock. There’s no way that he found his soulmate in all of this it was impossible.

“This is insane, out of all the times in my life where I’ve met amazing people why now all of a sudden?” Eddie directed the question towards the clock as if he would get a response. Nothing made sense, if he really thought about who the last person he talked to it lead him to a certain someone.

There’s no way

“Holy shit.” Eddie breathed as he ran hand through his hair.

This was going to be quite interesting.

-

Part 3

*sighs* this is going to be a slow burn isn’t it? 😕

I hope you guys enjoyed and give me some feedback! How can I make the story better? What would y’all like to see perhaps? Let me know!! Good night everyone :D

[welcometololaland]

wip wednesday

y'all - i feel like i've been so fucking annoying lately but i'm here to request one thing of you - give me some juicy snippets to read because i'm finally on top of my shit. and i've always wanted to start wip wednesday (for all i know someone has already started it but don't rain on my parade! let me live in denial) and now i maybe can. This is from ALTA which is (omg) so close to being posted. 10 days. fuck. i'm not ready (i am).

“She’s really gone, isn’t she?” TK asks, his voice breaking as his head remains burrowed into Carlos’ shoulder. He’s stopped shaking now, which Carlos takes to be a good sign, but he’s cried so persistently that the whole front of Carlos’ jacket is wet. 

He pauses, leans back and cups TK’s face in his hands, using his thumbs to brush away a few errant tears. He briefly considers making a passionate speech about TK’s mother being dead but not gone – living on in his heart – but then he decides for pragmatism. He thinks TK will appreciate that more, anyway.

“Yes,” he says simply. “But that doesn’t mean it’s easy to accept.”

TK sniffs, his glazed eyes staring helplessly into Carlos’ own. “What do I do now, Carlos?”

Carlos sighs, brushing away another of TK's tears. “I’m not really sure, TK,” he admits. “But right now, I can take you home. It might be nice to cry somewhere that isn’t your high school computer lab.”

A tiny, hesitant smile appears at the corners of TK’s mouth. “I think my dad will be relieved,” he says. “He keeps asking why I haven’t cried yet, like it's some kind of crime.”

“Well, he’s definitely going to be pleased to see you,” Carlos points out, as TK nods tearfully. 

“Could you— Do you mind coming with me?” TK asks as Carlos steps back and drops his hands. “I don’t really want to be alone and my dad is driving me nuts. My other friends…they wouldn’t understand.”

“I hope they do understand, TK,” Carlos replies solemnly, collecting his books and following TK out of the darkened classroom. “I think everyone will do their best to support you.”

TK makes a non-committal sound as they walk down the empty hall – devoid of students – amplifying the sound of their sneakers on the linoleum. “Not like you,” he says, after a pause. “I know we’ve only been friends for a little bit, but you’re different.”

“Oh yeah?” Carlos asks, pushing open the front doors and following TK down the steps. “In what way?”

TK pauses, looking back up at Carlos as he descends the stairs, a pensive look on his face. “You’re good, Carlos,” he replies simply. “You’re good for me.”

Open tag for anyone to share but also some targeted attacks under the cut (with insane requests, feel free to ignore me)!!!

@theghostofashton (need some exes to lovers PLEASE), @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut (boxing AU boxing AU!), @goodways (got a tasty treat shannon?) @reyesstrand (food fic???) @strandnreyes (please don't hurt me but you can if you want) @rmd-writes (just because i love you) @heartstringsduet (FIRST AID?!) @carlos-in-glasses (what's next up CIG?) @birdclowns (your wip snippet game has me blurry eyed, i must know more) @fitzherbertssmolder (any comic progress?) @louis-ii-reyes-strand (been loving your snippets) @lilythesilly (fighter pilot AU?!) @kiloskywalker (tarlos fighter pilot AU????) @sanjuwrites (soulmates????) @three-drink-amy (teacher AU teacher AU teacher AU!!) @chicgeekgirl89 (any yachts about?) @lemonlyman-dotcom (some music fic for my ears???) @wandering-night19 (4 x 18 coda???) @thisbuildinghasfeelings (cross stitching update??!!!) @freneticfloetry (something from the soulmates timer fic???) @alrightbuckaroo (summer parisian au my beloved!!!!) @cha-melodius (you've got mail AU????) @redshirt2 (anything you would like to contribute, i'd just love you to keep feeding me!) @iboatedhere (how are those prompts???) @orchidscript (lovingly bullying you to keep writing) @marjansmarwani (i know the words are hard but also i am lovingly bullying you as well <3) @morganaspendragonss (has angst queen got anything this week?) @lightningboltreader (THAT ANGSTY ONE BED THING I AM SCARED BUT I WANT)

[drksanctuary]

Nicobaster: Soulmates/games

For day two I did a collaboration with @thomas-life and we did a combination of both prompts:

And a hastily written and edited little excerpt for ya:

Alabaster sifts through the last of what must've been 30 decks of Mythomagic cards.

"Ah! Found him.! Aevin Lackluster: Master Spellcaster. Edition 4. From the Medieyval Myth campaign. He was and perhaps still is my favorite from that series. A lot of the other editions didn't have actual characters...so it was exciting at the time." Alabaster shrugs non-chalantly but his eyes are practically beaming at the card. As if he's holding a literal piece of his childhood self. And Maybe he is.

Nico grins at him from his seat on the floor. He's hunched over his own mess of cards, looking much like a dragon guarding its hoard of treasure. Cards haphazardly spill out from under his legs emphasizing just how many he has... Alabaster briefly wonders where he had he been keeping them all.

"Not a bad card," Nico agrees, "but he's nothing compared to Myra Darkweave, Necromancer Queen, also from Edition 4." Nico holds up one of the cards, and turns it to face Alabaster. She holds a skull in one hand. Her crown is either silver or bone, and around her neck is a familiar green necklace.

Alabaster examines it. Myra’s picture is one that mostly displays Purple,red and black. But the small splash of green stands out.

“Huh, May I?” He reaches out to take the card.

Nico holds it out for Alabaster to take and feigns scandalized gasp, "You don't have her card? how can you call yourself a fan?"

Alabaster plucks the card from Nico's fingers, careful not to bend or rip it.

"She never came up in the packs I had." He says, shaking his head. "I could only get what I could steal"

Nico continues smirking at him.

Al rolls his eyes. "So annoying" he says. /but attractive/ he thinks.

Nico snorts and starts picking through his cards, organizing them by...color? Alabaster raises an eyebrow at the choice, but seeing as in order to play they'd have to shuffle them anyway he supposes its as good a way as any.

Nico speaks without looking at him, that insufferable smug look refusing to leave his face, "I got a lot of my cards in the Lotus hotel." The smirk drops a little but come back full force a moment later, "I won them by beating the older kids" he snickers, "they were so mad getting bean by a 10 year old...its one of my greatest accomplishments." He preens.

"So you've always been this maddening?" Alabaster quips, as he compares their favorite cards side by side. Imagining Nico as a 10 year old sends shivers down his spine...shivers of dread. They'd probably have hated eachother.

Or perhaps they'dve been friendly Rivals. Alabaster remembers himself at 12.../nah probably enemies actually/. He chuckles to himself and diverts his attention back to the cards and Myra’s green necklace. The pattern and design of it is unmistakable. He looks over to Aevin's card to see that he is wearing that same green necklace.

"D'you...." Alabaster considers. He doesn't remember the lore concerning that particular item. Which is maddening considering he usually knows these things offhand. Was it part of some group?

"Look at this" Al continues. "They both have the same necklace... I can't recall what it signifies... do you know what it's for?"

Nico pauses in his organizing to look at the cards, beautiful dark eyes focusing under thick eyelashes. Alabaster bites the inside of his lip to recenter himself, so he doesn't just start staring at Nico Di Angelo like a looney.

"I think I remember that it was some sort of gift?" Nico shrugs, "or a prize?" Or was it a prized-posession? Nico hates being dyslexic, but honestly he was also 10 when he tried to read it so his memory might be faulty.

Alabaster hums. "I see. Well!" He whips out his trusty enchanted glasses that help him read. "Maybe I can look it up."

He pulls out an mythomagic handbook that is so worn that Nico might've mistaken it for an ancient artifact.

He flips through tissue thin pages. "Ah, here we are" Aevin's necklace was made by him, he carved protection runes on the back of the pendant to keep the wearer safe. (Plus 5 defense and plus 2 evasion). So it's a protection necklace...but why is it..." Alabaster’s eyes travel to a small fact box on the side of the page. "When he got married he gifted it to his beloved wife...Myra Darkweave. Who gave him her bracelet in exchange. To solidify them as soulmates through the ages..."

Alabaster looks over to Nico. /what a coincidence/ he thinks. That those two are their favorites...

@them-awesome-rarepairs please accept our late submission 😅 thank you!!!

[prince-rowan-of-the-forest]

silly soulmate au prompt: the characters can see all colors except for the one of their soulmates eyes until they meet them? (from @virgeandhis-pocket-protector)

@virgeandhis-pocket-protector hi :)

Over The Rainbow (1/4) - Patton

-----

Reds oranges and pinks almost always took centre stage in his drawings and paintings - after all, they were the only colours Roman could see, but the backgrounds were always made up of shades of grey - for him - that would be bright, vibrant colours for everyone else. They represented how he saw the world, and being honest… Roman was a little scared for it to change.

Later on, he would wonder why he worried.

He saw blue first.

----

| Ao3 | Next Chapter -> |

Fic Warnings: Nothing overarching aside from Remus being himself - any chapter-specific warnings will be in the notes.

Pairings: DLAMP, platonic creativitwins.

Notes:

This one got away from me a little and now I have a whole college/soulmate au. oops?

I've sat down and written almost 5k in one session... oops???

Anyway, this is eventual DLAMP! Each chapter we get a new soulmate added to the pile :))

I really hope you enjoy!

----

Roman couldn’t see colour. 

That was a common soulmate tell, and he knew it was a soulmate tell and not regular colourblindness because he coud see pink and red just fine. 

What was odd about Roman was just how many colours he couldn’t see. 

He’d been drilled enough by his family and friends - and even a colourblind specialist to make sure this wasn’t just regular colour blindness - to determine which colours he couldn’t see, which was… most of them.

They’d determined he must have at lest two soulmates - if both of them happened to have heterochromia - or at lesat five if they didn’t. There was always the chance for there to be more than that, considering many people had the same eye colours. Though having five was rare enough anyway. Even having two soulmates was rare enough. 

Roman didn’t know how to feel about it. Not entirely. 

He was excited to meet his soulmates - of course he wss! He was Roman, for goodness sake, he wrote romantic poems in hopes that he might recite them to his soulmates whenever he was to meet them. He read romance novel upon romance novel that included soulmates meeting in wondrous ways, he was so excited to meet them. 

Especially the ones with Violet and Yellow eyes, because those certainty weren’t common eye colours - hell, even the doctor had been surprised - by the yellow especially, since purple was at least possible if not rare. 

So yes, as Roman prepared to move states for college, he was excited to find his soulmates. 

But he had also… struggled. 

Roman was an artist. People told him he had a talent with pencils and paints. He loved putting paint down on a canvas, creating shapes and patterns with his brushes - and he’d found a way to make colourblindness almost part of his brand. 

Reds oranges and pinks almost always took centre stage in his drawings and paintings - after all, they were the only colours Roman could see, but the backgrounds were always made up of shades of grey - for him - that would be bright, vibrant colours for everyone else. They represented how he saw the world, and being honest… Roman was a little scared for it to change. 

Later on, he would wonder why he worried. 

He saw blue first. 

—

In college Roman was sharing a dorm room with his twin brother. He’d considered when applying that rooming with a stranger might be a good idea - a way to make a friend, or maybe even meet a soulmate if he was lucky - but in the end he’d backed out. He was glad Remus was coming to college with him, and while he was near certain that sharing a bedroom with his brother wasn’t going to be amazing, it would be… better, than a complete stranger. 

He’d immediately gone about applying for jobs on campus - god knows he needed the money - and that’s where he’d come across Blue, or as he now knew them, Patton. 

It was a rather sunny Saturday morning, and he’d been invited to a campus cafe for an interview after he’d submitted his application a few days ago. The place was nice - Roman had no idea if the walls were actually grey, or if they were just painted a colour he couldn’t see, but it was nicely decorated and smelled like fresh coffee and spice - as a coffee shop should. 

The person behind the counter was currently wiping down the espresso machine - the morning rush had died down by now so the shop wasn’t so busy. They had curly hair that brushed their jaw in a pale grey - Roman couldn’t know what colour it really was, but he suspected blonde from the lightness. They were turned away from him now, but Roman couldn’t help but still think they were pretty.

“Excuse me?” Roman said as he approacthed the counter, “I have a job inter- holy shit!”

“Language!” The person with sparkling blue eyes seemed to say almost on instinct, before gasping in surprise, “You’re orange!” 

“What- oh! Yes! You’re blue!” Roman said, face breaking into a bright smile as he blinked his amber eyes, “And so are the walls in here, oh my goodness!”

The barista - who’s nametag read ‘Patton’ leant across the counter, reaching for him, and Roman stepped closer to take his hands, “This is amazing! I didn’t expect to meet you here - oh! I’m Patton, um, I’m majoring in children’s education, and, uh, uh, what else? Well obviously I work in this shop-”

Roman chuckled, “Easy there - I’m sure we can get to know each other properly soon? I’m Roman, uh- do you have a napkin?”

“Yes, why?” Patton asked, passing him a napkin, on which Roman wrote down his name and phone number in sparkly red gel pen - he carried it everywhere, just in case. 

“I have a job interview I really need to get to,” Roman said, “But here, take this, and we’ll get coffee soon, yeah?”

“Absolutely! Oh I’m so excited - wait - you’re the guy here for the job interview? Oh my gosh I’m so sorry! I’ve made you late!”

Roman shook his head, “No worries, really, I’m actually quite glad about this particular distraction.” 

He winked and then grinned as he watched Patton’s face go red as they started spluttering, before shaking their hands and giggling. 

“I’ll um, I’ll be back with the manager,” Patton squeaked, before running out of a side door in about three seconds flat. Roman couldn’t help but chuckle, unable to keep the grin off of his face - he’d met the first one of his soulmates! Oh he couldn’t wait to tell Remus about this!

—

“So,” Patton said, elongating the vowel as they leant forward to look at Roman, who laughed. They’d gotten coffee as promised, but decided to take a walk through the campus instead of sitting to drink it, “Have… you met any of the others yet?”

Roman took a sip from his coffee, smiling at Patton before looking up at the bright blue sky - Roman hadn’t been able to stop staring at the sky since he’d met Patton, he’d probably painted it enough to make anyone else bored of seeing it by this point. 

“Not yet,” Roman answered with a wistful sigh, “I wonder if we share them all?”

“Id hope we do!” Patton said, nearly hopping with optimism, “I mean, I know some poly people prefer like - relationship chains, but I like it when everyone’s dating everyone, so that would be my ideal - you?”

“Oh same, I think I’d get jealous if my partners were dating people I wasn’t also dating,” Roman nodded, “So we’re still looking for… maybe four people?”

“I still can’t see green, purple, brown or yellow,” Patton said, bouncing on the balls of their feet as they walked, “Oh I can’t wait to see how pretty rainbows are! Or the grass! I’ve been told the grass and trees look lovely.”

Roman couldn’t help but smile at the other’s excitement, “Me too-! I really want to make a big painting symbolising all of us once we’ve all met - using all the colours properly.”

“You paint?” Patton gasped, grabbing Roman’s arm with one hand to stabilise themself as they almost tripped, “That’s so neat! I’m so awful at art.”

“I do!” Roman nodded, before glancing up at the sky as he got another idea… for later, “I’m sure you’re not that bad?”

“I am,” Patton chuckled, “I am that bad, thanks for trying to reassure me, though.”

Roman shook his head, “Maybe I can show you some things.”

“Maybe!” Patton grinned, “That could be fun! Oh - what’s your major?”

Immediately, Roman brightened, “I’m doing theatre, with minors in creative writing and illustration.”

“Wow!” Patton gasped, “That’s a lot! You look happy with it! Are you in the theatre club? I know my roomie Remy is part of it.”

“You’re roommates with Remy?” Roman asked, shocked, “I’m genuinely surprised you’re still sane.”

“Awee c’mon, he’s not that bad,” Patton waved a hand, “I take it that’s a yes?”

“Yeah! I’ve only been to one meeting so far though.” Roman grinned, “But Remy already seems like… he had a lot of character.”

“You can say that again,” Patton giggled, “Okay - next question…. Hmm…. thoughts on cats?”

—

“Hello, I’m-”

“Patton, the soulmate Ro’s been raving about nonstop the past two weeks to the point where I actually went outside to sleep in the dumpster, yea, I know who you are,” Roman’s twin brother interrupted Patton, his giggles counteracting the words, “Not that I wouldn't’ve done that anyway.”

“Remus!” Roman hissed, “You’re gonna scare him off!”

Remus rolled his eyes, “I’m not gonna censor myself for your fucking soulamte-”

“Language-”

“-If Patty here can’t handle me he doesn’t deserve you,” Remus continued as though Patton hadn’t even spoken, he walked over and plopped down on his messy bed, “So, have you two sucked face yet or what? Any kinky shit?”

“ Remus! ” Roman cried as Patton squeaked and covered their face to hide the dark blush, Roman did nothing to hide the equally vivid blush on his own face, “ No! ”

“Awee that sucks,” Remus huffed, “What have you two even been doing if you haven’t fucked yet? It’s been like - a month.”

Roman just sighed, “Patton, you don’t have to listen to him.”

“It’s- it’s okay,” Patton said, chuckling awkwardly, “Um, yeah, it’s uh, it’s nice to meet you, Remus.”

“Wow!” Remus grinned, “This guy really is resilient! Maybe he does like you after all, Ro!”

“Of course I like Roman!” Patton yelped, “We just - we wanna wait for a relationship to happen naturally, because being a soulmate doesn’t mean you have to rush into a relationship - and besides, we still have others to meet! I don’t want them to feel left out!”

Remus made a gagging noise before rolling his eyes at Roman, “You really had to find the sunshine one first? Not like - I dunno, someone cool?”

Roman just sighed, “Patton I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay!” Patton giggled, winking at Roman before bounding over to sit on Roman’s bed across from Remus, “So, you wanna hear about the time I beat up a kid outside a Denny’s in highschool?”

“ Do I! ” Remus gasped, grinning and leaning forwards so far that Roman thought he might fall off of his bed - he seemingly pulled a bag of popcorn from… somewhere as Patton began to explain and Roman could already tell that they’d won Remus over with this one. 

Roman couldn’t help but sit down at his desk to listen intently too.

Apparently, the kid in question had been in Patton’s year - a junior, at the time - and had been bullying a few freshmen Patton had been decent friends with at the time. Somehow, Patton defending the kids had gone far enough that they ended up fighting the kid outside a Denny’s at night - and winning, mind you. The kid hadn’t done much bullying after that. 

they’d become something of an older brother figure to the younger teens in highschool - with the teachers not wanting to do anything about reported bullying, someone had to step in. Honestly, Roman was impressed by the dedication that Patton seemed to have for taking care of people.

“That,” Roman said once Patton had finished their story, face a flustered red, “Was…. so unexpected.”

“Not bad, though, right?” Patton asked, worried, “I mean - maybe I should’ve have gotten physical-”

“No man!” Remus interrupted, “That’s so fucking cool, dude, how the hell did you win a fight like that? You look like a breeze could knock you over!”

“Oh, well, I uh, I did a lot of sports as a kid - swimming, gymnastics, some soccer,” Patton listed, “So I got pretty strong, and my mums made sure I knew self defense just in case…”

“That is awesome ,” Roman grinned, “I’m glad our soulmates can count on us to protect them!”

“Aboslutely!” Patton nodded rapidly, “I wouldn’t let anyone hurt any of you!”

“Hear hear,” Roman nodded.

“If anyone hurts either of you I will rip their throats out,” Remus cackled, “With my teeth .”

“Glad to know you got our backs, buddy,” Patton said, giving Remus a thumbs up.

Yeah, Roman thought, t his might work out alright after all. 

---

tags: @full-of-roman-angst-trash @reptilianrapscallion420 @your-local-random-dino @cutebisexualmess @glacierruler @roseianxiety @bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti

| Ao3 | Next Chapter -> |

[benscursedkid]

Synopsis: Anything your soulmate loses finds its way to you. Rebekah takes an embarrassingly long amount of time to realize something she should’ve known all along.

Genre: fluff, angst

Notes: written for the hphm 2024 ship week! I know it’s day one and I’m using a day 2 prompts but they’re my favorites. unfortunately, inspiration is finicky and I just have to follow where it leads. hope nobody minds! this could technically be a two-in-one with the DANCE prompt. I completely lost track of time soon so it ends kinda abruptly so sorry about that!

**Also a quick note, I’d grown too attached to the backstory I’d come up with before mcs canon dad was introduced, so I’m ignoring that.

Rebekah’s soulmate, she determined at a young age, must be quite forgetful. Growing up, it was a remarkably common occurrence for her to wake up in the morning with some strange and foreign object sitting on her nightstand. Being a witch, she was used to all kids of magical items with powers beyond the imagination. What made these items so strange, however, was the striking mundanity of them.

She remembers vividly the morning she awoke to a small red plastic box on her nightstand. Inspecting it found a small blade nestled on the inside. With her brother at school, she had to settle for asking her parents if they had any idea what the odd thing was.

Her father laughed brightly when he saw in, small enough to fit in her palm. He walked over to his desk nestled in the living room corner and brought back one of his muggle writing utensils.

“This, my dear, is a pencil sharpener.” He chuckled and plucked it carefully from between her fingers.

Putting the pointy end in the sharpener, he turns it a few times. When he removes it, Rebekah is astonished to realize it’s sharper than it was before. How unique.

“I think those are better than quills,” Rebekah giggles and examines both the pencil and the sharpener. “This is so plain! And it’s way easier to write with.”

Her father grins happily at her apparent approval and taps the sharpener curiously. “Where did you get this if you don’t know what it is?” He asks.

“I found it in my room. I think it was—”

“Your soulmate,” her father finishes for her astutely.

Rebekah is more than pleased by this development. Her soulmate always loses the strangest things. She loves getting to see these things. Forming a picture in her mind of what they must be like. If they use lots of pencils, maybe they’re an artist! Or maybe they like writing stories.

Her father, on the other hand, turns away from her with the faintest frown. His brows are furrowed as he considers something in his head and she grabs his hand.

“Dad?”

Her voice snaps him from his thoughts and his frowns is quickly replaced with a smile. “Oh, sorry, Beks. It’s nothing. I’m glad you get to have this.”

In her youthfulness, Rebekah does not pull at this thread. She accepts this reply and focuses back on the pencil sharpener. Maybe if she would have, she could’ve saved herself and her soulmate a lot of time.

~✰~

The night that her brother disappeared, Rebekah couldn’t sleep. She’d caught him leaving in the middle of the night and Jacob managed to convince her to go back to bed and that she’d see him in the morning. Despite listening to him, Rebekah just had a sinking, dreadful feeling that he was wrong.

She tossed and turned all night. Her stomach felt like it had been twisted into several knots. When sleep finally claimed her, the sun had been just beginning to rise.

When she did eventually wake up, it was to the exact news she had feared. She wasn’t sure how she knew, but she did. Her parents could barely say the words.

Nobody really spoke that day. Everyone just cried. Even though Jacob had only been reported missing, it felt like they were mourning him already. Rebekah couldn’t get away fast enough, back to the quiet solitude of her room. At least there she couldn’t hear the despair of her mother’s cries and couldn’t see the emptiness in her father’s eyes.

She changed into her pajamas with haste, hoping that maybe if she went to sleep, she wouldn’t have to feel this way anymore. At least for a time. Though, When she returned to her bed there was something there waiting for her.

Rebekah was surprised to see it. Usually, she only received her soulmate’s things in the morning.

Yet there it was, plain as day. Her steps were hesitant as she approached it. A long day of grief had left her tired and weary. But when her fingers met the soft fur, her tears began anew.

It was a teddy bear, dressed impeccably in a little white bow tie around its neck. The soft fur was a dark, chocolatey brown and felt like what she would imagine a princess’s pillow to be like. There was a small smile stitched into its face and round black eyes watching her. As soon as she touched it, she crumbled again.

Rebekah sat on her bed, pulled it into her lap, and wrapped her arms all the way around it. Her tears got the fur wet, but having something to catch them provided an unspeakable amount of support.

She wasn’t sure if her soulmate had sensed something was wrong and lost it on purpose. Or perhaps they were just that absent-minded. Whatever the case may be, all Rebekah knows is that night, her tears weren’t entirely unhappy.

~✰~

When Rebekah was finally accepted into Hogwarts, she had some faith that she might find her soulmate there.

Throughout the years, they had all come to the conclusion that her soulmate had to be a muggle. That, or perhaps a muggle-born. It was the only explanation they had for all the lost items Rebekah had received up to that point. This might’ve bothered someone else, but Rebekah cared little of the circumstances of her soulmate’s birth. Her own father is a muggle and the best man she knows so this possibility does not perturb her.

Still, she would prefer that they were still of the wizarding world if only so she could meet them sooner.

It was, in fact, right outside of potions that Rebekah met Ben Copper for the first time. Perhaps it was Merula’s bad attitude that had soured the mood or their shy natures that threw her off. It only matters that when they met, the thought did not immediately cross her mind. Surely, soulmates should compliment each other—she thought. Whereas her and Ben could barely take turns muttering their sentences.

Even as the year went on and she discovered he was indeed a muggle-born, Rebekah had all but forgotten about the possibility of meeting her soulmate when faced with the potentiality of getting her brother back.

The task began to consume her. If she could find him, if she could save him then she could bring him back and fix their family! Their mother and father had not been the same since Jacob disappeared. The house was too empty. The old pictures in frames on the wall were too painful to look at anymore.

By the time one might start to connect the dots, Rebekah’s priorities were fully somewhere else.

The only time that this question ever returned to cross her mind, was when Hogwarts held for them a ball in her fourth year.

Of course, it was with no small amount of glee that she found herself accompanying Ben as his date. She would be lying if she said she did not feel something for him. A crush if ever she’s had one, but the distant thought of her soulmate always held her back from seeking more. She does not have time for a boyfriend anyway. Not if she hopes to find Jacob before she graduates.

But when she met Ben at the top of the ballroom stairs, the spark that ran through her felt more magical than magic. She could enjoy tonight at least. They had both certainly earned it.

While they were dancing, a confession slipped off her tongue, one so silly it made her laugh.

“Y’know,” she says. “I had planned to make you a custom tie. It’s probably a lot for a dance, I know, but I’ve been experimenting a lot with painting. I’ve been talking to Filch and he helped me with a charm that would allow me to reflect my paintings onto an object. I thought it would be a nice gift but I guess it wasn’t meant to be.”

Ben’s cheeks pinked at the admission, a small, intimate smile on his face. “How come?”

“I lost it,” Rebekah laughs at herself. How she could manage to lose one of her own projects is beyond her. She must’ve been more distracted than she thought. “It was supposed to have stars on it. The Sagittarius constellation specifically since I know that’s your sign.”

Rebekah had missed the expression on his face then, but his feet stuttered in their practiced steps. Her eyes caught his and asked him an unspoken question.

Ben merely cleared his throat and looked bashfully away. “That’s—wow. That’s a shame. I think I would’ve loved it.”

“Me too.”

~✰~

Graduation was a very bittersweet occasion. Stepping foot into Hogwarts had opened up so many doors and lit the fire of several hopes and dreams. All of which has now been effectively shattered. Aside from the fact that she did manage to save her brother, nothing has panned out the way she wanted. It would not be a stretch to say that she is leaving the school a more hardened woman than the little girl who walked in.

As is tradition, the graduating class is throwing a huge going away party in the school’s largest courtyard. Though, many of her peers can be seen slipping away here and there.

Rebekah turns and checks the time on the clocktower, sighing as she takes a sniff of the firewhiskey Andre had insisted she try a sip of.

“Waiting for someone?”

The familiar voice shocks her back to the present and she turns to find Ben grinning at her. Suddenly, the whole party sounds a little less loud and some of the voices fall away. She smiles back.

“I was worried you wouldn’t show.” She muses and he offers a playful look to the drink in her hand. A laugh rips from her and she shakes her head, turning around to pour out the contents from the goblet she’d been drinking from.

“Well, it’s our going away party. I wanted to make sure I was dressed appropriately.”

Rebekah chuckles takes a step back to examine the outfit he chose. It’s hard to tear her stare away from his eyes, soft and brown, and his hair—the blond strands now more stylishly ruffled than when they were kids. He appears to have settled on a darker outfit than she’s used to seeing on him, but it actually lends itself to a more mysterious look that she thinks he’s been aiming for recently. Admits the dark backdrop of the night, she can’t say it doesn’t feel on theme.

“Recognize anything?” He tries to tease, but the words sound a bit strangled and nervous in his throat.

She offers him a puzzled look before inspecting again. It takes far longer than she cares to admit for her eyes to widen and her mouth to drop open.

“Ben, is that—”

“It’s a tie I’ve had for a while now,” he informs her casually, even if his nervous posture betrays him. “I’ve never really had a good opportunity to wear it, though.”

Rebekah shakes her head, still completely dumbfounded. Her thoughts are raving too fast for her logic to keep up with. “Where did you get that?”

“I found it,” he murmurs then, low but gentle.

His eyes soften and Rebekah doesn’t have the words. “I lost it…”

“I know.”

She blinks and he grabs her hands to pull her closer. She allows it easily. His proximity warms her even though the night isn’t cold.

“Have you known this whole time?” Is the only question all the voices in her head can agree on.

Ben’s chuckle is a breath of fresh air that washes over her. “No. I mean, I had suspicions but they weren’t confirmed until the night we went to the ball together.”

“You’ve known since then?” He nods delicately like he’s afraid of spooking her. “Then why didn’t you say anything?”

He can only shrug. A wry smile makes a crooked show of his mouth. There’s a hint of self-deprecation there that she despises. “It was never the right time. We weren’t ready.”

That is a point she can’t argue. Even now there are things about herself she wishes she could alter, moments and experiences she wishes hadn’t changed her, but it feels like it’s taken her this long to free herself and find herself after drowning for so long in all the things she thought she had to do.

“But I’m ready now,” Ben assures her. This time, his voice is firm, optimistic even. “If you are.”

Rebekah isn’t sure what to say, so she decides to trust her actions to speak for her.

She kisses him beneath the moonlight, a clocktower, and a show of fireworks. As she does, she cannot help but laugh at herself and how crazy she’s been to have not seen him sooner.

[bcbdrums]

💭

For the Fanfic Writer Ask Game :3

💭 What inspires you and your writing? (from this post)

ooooh tough one! thank you, i like the challenge of this question!

as i think back to my literal earliest writings at age 6, 8, 9 and into the teenage years and finally adulthood is when i really started writing.... there's a lot. at the core though, is emotion. and a desire i suppose to tell a story.

the first thing i can truly consider my own was a homework assignment at age 8 that my mom did not proofread before i handed it in. it received the highest grade and the teacher read it aloud to the class and asked me this very question: how did i do it? (you know... this may subconsciously be why i adore writing prompts. it was a single sentence prompt we were given to write from. heheh.)

anyway, i remember answering that i wrote what i saw. some of it was what i physically saw, and then some was imagined based on the actual scene. but i could see it in my mind's eye; i could see the story and feel the emotions surrounding it.

even though all i post is fanfiction, i did write some original stories here and there a long time ago. tiny things, like the school assignment. again they're all from a place of emotions i relate to... experiences i've had or that i want to have... that's part of the imagination piece. things i have read before in other stories, or imagine to be real based on things i've heard described, pictures i've seen...

so then we come to fanfiction. when it's character-driven as nearly all of my pieces are... and i'm thinking back here to my earliest fanfic writings (which are handwritten and unfinished lol oops) it was all in the end to tell something deeper of the soul... to grasp onto some depth of emotion that i know i myself crave.... or if not something i crave specifically, just seeking to feel...

that description is rather reminding me of what i hear people say about drug addictions. seeking the next high, you know? and you gotta go deeper each time or something, to find the satisfaction. i suppose there's an element of that in there as well. writing is a bit of transparency in that...i guess i'm seeking something i don't have. usually it's a depth of relationship, a seeking to be known and to know another. up until i wrote drakken/shego fanfic i really did not write romance at all. i was always going after the platonic soulmate vibe. sometimes that depth of knowing can get lost in a romance vibe i think?

but anyway... yes... what inspires me? a craving for more. i write for that emotional depth. that next high. but also the adventure... the seeking of something beyond the walls of....existence. oh to be able to just say... let's go explore that cave in the east that has its own weather system! let's go explore the amazon! the sahara! let's drift on a gondola in the canals of venice on a moonlit night! let's look down on the earth from a plane at 35000 feet and see what God and man have wrought!

man idk if that answers this well enough. i guess also unanswered questions? in fanfic, for characters. like, what happened to adam cartwright after he moved away and how did it impact each family member? what happened after the end of quantum leap?? is h.m. murdock truly insane? why did spock really leave starfleet? what else motivates sonic the hedgehog? why did shego abandon heroism and become a villain? will dr. drakken become a good guy post-canon or will he remain in evil?? what truly happened between stein and spirit to break up their partnership yet cause them to pick up right where they left off fifteen years later???

it's always...missing pieces, and always connected to emotion... yeah again, idk if this answers the question well enough. but my gosh you've got me buzzing. maybe this will kickstart my writing drive again cuz i let it go dormant to play sims 24/7 for a month.

thank you friend, for the ask! ^^

[thescarsilivewith-if]

How would the ros react to the monarch distancing themselves from the ros, after discovering they (monarch) are terminally ill and don't have much time left to live?

(the monarch believing that if they distance themselves enough from the ros, the ros wouldn't feel as burdened and sad when the monarch dies)

Naja: they are so hurt at first. They try not to be too upset but really, not knowing why the monarch acts as such makes them very disoriented. Nonetheless, they keep their composure and only steal some worried, sad glances towards MC when they aren't being looked at.

Whether or not they discover the truth, Naja would be incredibly in pain at losing the person they love and are dedicated most. But maybe knowing their end in near beforehand could provide them the opportunity to come to terms with it, maybe to discuss with MC how to live afterwards, maybe simply to comfort and be comforted before it happens.

Valaahr: at first, they give the monarch space. They try to discover what prompted this because after a while a sensation of dread starts to grow within them.

They would have liked to know. If only to hold the monarch as much as they can, because while Valaahr in general avoids physical contact, it would leave them destroyed bearing the regret of not doing it more with the one they consider their soulmate.

Valaahr would bluntly tell MC that losing them woulf hurt like an organ being ripped out no matter what. But they would have liked the chance to soothe the monarch before it happens, to prepare them and also come to terms themselves with the end of their love.

Kaela: they are suspicious and worried at this sudden behavour. After some time of silently enduring it, they will confront the monarch.

Kaela can feel very anxious when they are powerless or in the dark about some important matter, so this worsening situation would make them feel almost ill.

Yes, it would be painful to watch their love near their end without nothing to do, but it would also help prepare them, because if MC died suddenly, Kaela would struggle even more to accept it, and to accept their lover spent their last days keeping them at distance in order to spare them from the pain.

[unknownfacelessfanfictions]

Tick Tock goes the clock

Fandom: Star Trek Enterprise Pairing: Malcolm Reed x Reader Words: 5.2K Warnings: Mentions of death, maybe a bit violence? Summary: Reader and Malcolm are trapped together in a cell until Archer manages to bail them out. Prompt: Soulmate AU!, where you have a count down on your arm, that shows how long it will take you to finally meet your soulmate. A/N: This didn't excactly went into the direction I wanted it too, but I kind of like it.

Y/N breathed in and out deeply, legs crossed cross-legged, hands resting on one knee each, urgently trying to rid the biting cold from her limbs as she regretted for the umpteenth time taking Ensign Jones with her.

As the only anthropologist, she had been sent to Licaurus, an M-class planet inhabited by a post-warp culture that, despite scientific advances, clung firmly to its traditions. One of them, for example, was that to greet visitors who were not part of one's own family, a sharp blade was held to the throat, tip out. Not, however, the sides of the neck, as the Licaurs thus displayed romantic or sexual interest, depending on which side the blade was on.

This was for the purpose of demonstrating the superior power one could theoretically have, but at the same time showing their peaceful will, as they did not actually cut the throat. A tradition that Y/N had explicitly explained several times to the rest of the landing party, consisting of Ensign Jones, a security officer, and Ensign Rouge, a science officer. Ensign Rouge had adhered to this tradition, however Ensign Jones seemed not to have even begun to listen to Y/N, because as soon as Colbix, the Lincaure who was supposed to greet them, put his edge to her throat, Ensign Jones pulled out his pistol and pointed it at Colbix. From then on, everything was out of hand.

The guards who had accompanied Colbix, another purely symbolic sign of power not exercised under normal circumstances, had in turn pointed their weapons at Jones. Y/N had tried to reason with both sides and had repeatedly asked Jones to lower his weapon. However, Jones did not seem to trust her knowledge, as he did not lower his weapon but fired a shot.

From then on, at the latest, she knew that this mission, which was supposed to be simple, would be a disaster. Before Jones had even taken his finger off the trigger, if there was such a thing with these weapons, she wasn't sure, he was hit three times in the chest and slumped to the ground. Y/N had had to suppress a scream, which Ensign Rouge had not managed so well. She had ordered her not to make a sound and certainly not to run away.

Lincauren would see this running away as complicity and would also open the hunt for her. They believed that someone who was innocent would not feel the need to flee, a tradition they had also impressed on Rouge and Jones. Rouge, however, seemed to have forgotten everything in her panic, because, despite Y/N's insistent talking, she turned and fled in the opposite direction.

Instantly Colbix sent several guards after her. Y/N had had to suppress a heavy swallow. She had seen the excited glint in their eyes. Their hunting instincts had been aroused. And all she could do now was pray for Lieutenant Rouge.

After that, everything had happened quite quickly. Two guards had grabbed her by the arms and dragged her behind them. She had not fought back, otherwise they would also declare her "guilty" and possibly do worse than lock her in the cold cell she was currently in.

Y/N, however, was not afraid for herself. She was innocent and considering that the Lincaurs had not yet executed her, they probably believed it. She was more worried about the crew of the Enterprise, especially Ensign Rouge.

She could only hope that she had been able to contact the Enterprise and was now safely back on the ship. Otherwise, there would probably be a problem soon.

They had been ordered to report in every two hours. It had certainly been seven if not eight hours since the last time. And the way she saw Archer, he would do anything to get his crew back. At least what was left of it.

She could only hope that Commander T'Pol had looked at her notes on the Licaurs beforehand. Otherwise, it could quickly end with her being the only one to survive on this planet.

With a low moan, she stretched out her legs. A soft crack came from her knees and she screwed up her face. She was really getting old.

All at once she heard footsteps approaching. She looked up. No guard had entered this room since they had thrown her in here. Perhaps she was lucky and the Licaurs had concluded that she was not part of this "conspiracy", rather a misunderstanding in her opinion, and would let her go. Or, perhaps they did find her guilty and would now execute her. Y/N hoped very much for the former.

Slowly she straightened up. Her legs and back ached and she was pretty sure she had broken a rib, thanks to the end of the gun from one of the guards that he had rammed into her chest. Her legs were shaking, but she didn't know if it was from the cold or because she could barely feel her legs.

The door swung open and two guards entered.

For a moment she really believed they were going to get her out of here. But only until a third guard pushed another person into her cell and all three retreated again. With a loud bang, the iron door was pulled shut behind them and Y/N was alone in the cell, along with the groaning man on the floor. A heavy sigh escaped her as she slid down the wall.

"Well, you sound pleased to see me," the man scoffed and sat up with a groan. Her gaze flew quickly over him. He was slightly shorter than most of the men on board, had short dark hair and appeared to have a small scar on his upper lip. His eyes continued to be closed as he leaned against the wall opposite her. "Well, I was honestly hoping to get out of here," she admitted, adding "Lieutenant" after a quick glance at his right breast.

"We're working on it. At least the captain is." All at once she understood why he was sitting in the cell with her. "So I guess Captain Archer has started negotiations with the Licaurs? For a moment I thought you were as much a prisoner as I am, sir." He snorted. "Well, I wouldn't call it a holiday." She smirked. "Perhaps not. However, it's tradition among the Licaurs that when negotiations take place, one hostage from each side is taken from the other."

"Hostage?!"

"They call it joristica. Or joristico. Or even joristice. It depends on the gender. Female, Male or Other." The man raised his eyebrow. "It's tradition. Nothing is done to the hostages. Provided, of course, that Captain Archer doesn't cause any problems." He was still leaning against the wall with his eyes closed. "You sure know a lot about this culture." She looked at him for a few moments.

"I'm Lieutenant Y/N Y/L/N, the anthropologist who accompanied this landing party. I should make sure nothing goes wrong." The man snorted. "Well that worked." Y/N folded her arms in front of her chest.

"Is it my fault that both Ensign Jones and Ensign Rouge threw my advice to the wind?" She looked down at the floor.

"I gave both of them a short briefing beforehand and pointed out to them the most important things and traditions of the Licaurs. I am well aware that it is not possible to learn everything in such a short time. Nevertheless, I must have told them five or six times to stay calm, not to see the greeting as a threat and not to run away under any circumstances, should an emergency occur. Both Ensign Jones and Ensign Rouge did not take my admonitions seriously or even follow them. Even when I told them so myself in the situation at hand."

Now it was up to her to close her eyes, a pained expression on her face. "And now both of them are dead. Because I failed as a superior officer."

She heard the rustling of clothes. Apparently the man had just sat up. "Ensign Rouge is not dead, Lieutenant. She is alive. She was able to contact Enterprise. Why do you think we're here in the first place?" She stifled a sarcastic comment as relief spread through her chest.

"She's alive?" Y/N opened her eyes and looked into the face of the man, who had apparently decided to open his as well. He was smiling. In the darkness she couldn't quite make out the colour of his eyes, however they seemed bright. She felt a slight itch on her left forearm, but suppressed the urge to scratch.

"Yes. She is in the infirmary with some scrapes and scratches and seems slightly traumatised, but Doctor Phlox is of the opinion that she will be fine." Absently, she noticed that the lieutenant seemed to be struggling with itching as well. Lost in thought, he rubbed his left forearm through the sleeve of his uniform. Maybe there was some substance here that didn't do well with her uniform?

"But it's too late for Ensign Jones," she added with a lowered voice and gaze. "And that's my fault. I should have prepared him harder."

"No," his voice was gentle. "If it's anyone's fault, it's mine. I am his direct supervisor. He falls under my purview, not yours." At these words she listened up. "What did you say your name was again?"

"Malcolm Reed."

She had to suppress a swallow. Of course, it was her luck to be trapped in a cell with a senior officer. She shook her head slightly to clear her mind. She was beginning to feel that this constant coldness was freezing her mind. "I don't think it was your fault, sir." Reed looked up from his lap and a shiver came over her

. The cold really had to be getting to her. "He may have been under your charge, however, it had been my job to properly brief him." He shook his head, but before he could say anything she continued. "But still you feel guilty, don't you sir? Is that why you volunteered to be the joristico?" Reed frowned. "How do you know?" She pressed her lips together. Why did she have to have such a big mouth?

"Well, ninety percent of the time when Phlox cancels our lunch it's because you're lying in sickbay, having volunteered for some mission, sir. I was beginning to think you were suffering from chronic self-sacrifice." As soon as she uttered the words, she bit her lip. Reed might also be a lieutenant in rank, but he was still a senior officer and therefore a little higher in rank than she was. He raised an eyebrow. "Lieutenant-"

"I know, sir. I crossed a line and I should have kept my mouth shut. Pardon me." A small smirk tugged at the corners of his mouth. "At ease, lieutenant. It's all right." She smiled briefly. "Thank you." She hesitated and Reed noticed it right away. "I guess you and I are going to be spending quite a bit of time here, so don't be shy. What did you want to ask?" Y/N briefly moistened her lips with the tip of her tongue. "Would you mind explaining to me what has happened since we lost contact with Enterprise? As you said, we're going to spend some more time here. And I don't know about you, sir, however, I would hate to spend that time in silence." He nodded. "I guess you're right."

Immediately he began his report. At first she listened to him attentively, but as time went by her eyes began to grow dull and tiredness overcame her. The only reason she had not long since sunk into the realm of dreams was the constant itching on her forearm. "Am I boring you?"

She blamed fatigue and constant coldness for her subsequent reply. "Sorry sir, it's just.... Has anyone ever told you that your voice is very soothing and pleasant?" Silence followed, then a soft chuckle. "Soothing and pleasant?"

"Mhhmmm. Especially the accent is nice. Different from constant Yanks where you can't understand a thing." A soft laugh rang out and it was only moments later that she realised what exactly she had been saying. Right off the bat she sat up and felt the heat rise to her face.

"I...no I... I meant... Bloody hell... See...," she tried to talk her way out of it as Reed looked at her with amusement on his face. "My accent?" She slapped her hands over her face in exasperation. "Forget it, please. It's the dehydration. And the cold. I'm afraid I can't think straight." All at once all amusement was gone from his face and replaced by concern. "How long have you been here?"

She shrugged languidly. "I don't know, sir, seven hours, maybe eight." Reed sat up straighter and slid over to her. "And how long since you had a drink?" He took her wrist in his to take her pulse. His warm skin on her cold one gave her goosebumps and instantly warmth spread through her as well.

"Sir, I don't know if you are aware, but as long as the Licaurs hold prisoners, especially joristices, they will not be provided with food, water or blankets. This is to help negotiations move along more quickly." There was horror reflected on Reed's face. "Are you telling me that the last time you drank was eight hours ago?" "Maybe longer." A shiver came over her and the itch got worse with every passing second. "The cold is worse, though."

Reed regarded her thoughtfully for a moment before sighing. "I almost froze to death once and at least I had blankets then. I'm not really up for a repeat. So begging your pardon." And with that, he put an arm around her shoulder and pulled her closer.

His aftershave rose to her nose and she grew even warmer. Actually, that should have been pleasant after hours of cold, but the itch intensified unbearably, almost agonisingly, until she gave in, pushed up her sleeve and let her fingernails run over her skin.

A satisfied sigh escaped her.

"I certainly hope your mate won't hold it against me. After all, I'm only trying to stop you from freezing to death." She frowned, broke free of the embrace and turned. His face was closer than she'd thought, which made her slide back a little. "What are you talking about, sir?" Now it was up to Reed to frown and he nodded over to her forearm. "Your soul mate. I hope he understands."

Confused, she looked down. Her breath caught in her throat and she was pretty sure her eyes were round as plates. On her forearm, where a countdown had usually been displayed in gruesomely conspicuous white lettering, there was now nothing but an infinity sign in a more inconspicuous black. "What the hell?" Dumbfounded, she stared at her arm. "When..how..what.." Reed looked at her in surprise. "You didn't know?"

"No! How could I?!" She pinched herself once to make sure she wasn't already hallucinating from the cold. "Before the mission, there was still the countdown. Heck, even before I was thrown in that cell."

She couldn't understand it. It usually showed, after all. In her head she went through the signs again. Shivers, warmth to the touch, an irrepressible itch until the partner touched the mark- She faltered. Could it be- Her gaze met Reed's before moving to his forearm. He was still scratching through his uniform. She had to risk it. "May I see your forearm, please?"

Reed's eyes widened. "Excuse me?" She felt the heat rush to her face, however she did her best to look professional. "As you know, normal signs of finding your mate are shivering, itching and warmth to the touch. I've been showing these symptoms since you came in. Of course, it could be one of the guards, but since you've been scratching your arm yourself since you got here, I have to consider the possibility. So may I?"

Reed looked down in surprise, as if only now noticing the scratching, and nodded absently. Carefully, she took his jacket sleeve, took a deep breath and pushed it up. What came to light was the same black infinity mark that was very apparent on his pale skin.

" Bloody hell." Dumbfounded, Reed stared at his arm. She looked up in surprise. From what she'd heard, Reed was actually always professional and kept his feelings to himself most of the time. Seeing him like this...she had to admit, it was intriguing. "But it was different before!" She let herself sink back and stared at the floor. "I guess that makes it pretty obvious, doesn't it?"

She could feel his gaze on her and looked up. The light coming through the window cast no shadows on his face this time, so she could see it clearly. "Guess so. So, what do we do now?" She smirked shyly. "Maybe you could touch my mark? It still itches horribly." Lost in thought, he placed his hand on her forearm while still staring intangibly at his. Relieved, she sighed as the unbearable itch disappeared. "Thank you."

Reed didn't respond, but leaned back a little to give her more space. After some silence, Reed raised his voice. "I want to be honest with you, Lieutenant. I never really believed in all that soul mate stuff." Y/N shook her head almost in relief. She wasn't alone in that opinion.

"Neither did I really, sir. It struck me as odd that the universe should determine who is the best match for me and who I should spend my life with." He nodded in agreement. His gaze wandered down and only now did they both notice that he still had his hand on her forearm.

He turned slightly red in the face and withdrew his hand instantly. Shyly he looked into her eyes and for a moment she was no longer sure if the man in front of her was really the same man who was usually so heroically willing to sacrifice himself. "And what do you suggest we do?"

She hesitated. "Permission to speak freely, sir?" He smiled shyly. "You don't have to ask my permission. It would be a bit strange in this situation, wouldn't it? But if that's the way you want it, permission granted, Lieutenant" She smiled. "Thank you." Nervousness spread through her. "While I never, really believed in this, however, I would hate to pretend it didn't happen. I expect nothing from you and if you wish to keep our relationship purely professional, I will accept your wish." Reed's face had turned even redder. "I don't mean to offend you, however, I don't think I'm cut out or ready for a romantic relationship right now."

Now it was up to her to feel heat on her face. "Oh, no, I didn't mean it like that. I mean, sure, romantic relationships are usually where soulmates end up. After all, even Starfleet has allowed relationships to happen between soulmates, even if they have different ranks. However, I think you know, as I do, that sometimes soulmates are just good friends and-"

She groaned. "What I'm saying is, I'm not ready for a romantic relationship right now either. I just got out of my last one and it wasn't that nice. Actually, I wanted to ask what exactly you want out of all this. What is your "maximum goal"? A strict working relationship? Friendship? Maybe a romantic relationship later on?"

She added the last more quietly, however Reed must have heard it because he blushed again. "I just want there to be no misunderstanding. As I said before, many expect the true love after they meet their soulmate. But if that is not your wish, I will leave it at friendship or work. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable, sir."

He looked up and she thought she saw gratitude and amazement in equal measure on her face. "Thank you for your honesty. I appreciate it. "

He looked down as he moved a little closer to her. During the conversation, she had been leaning against the wall, which was why they were now sitting next to each other.

"I don't know what exactly to make of this. I don't know what I should expect. Or want to expect. However, I agree with you. I would hate to forget all this. I already told you that I'm not ready for a romantic relationship right now. In the near or distant future, maybe I am. We could just take a chance on that?"

Y/N nodded slightly. Reed slowly lifted his arm. "May I?" Again she nodded and he once more put his arm around her. Though this time she didn't feel a rush of warmth, it was pleasant in spite of everything. "We could take it slow," he added after a while.

She looked up at him. "And how?" He shrugged. "I don't know. Would you mind having a weekly dinner together? Of course we'd have to see if it works with our shifts but I'm sure we could work something out. Assuming that's what you're interested in, of course. You don't have to and please don't feel pressured to do it, it's just an offer, I-"

"Love to, sir." Smiling, she looked at him and he returned her smile with a small smirk. "If you don't mind, I'd ask you to just call me Malcolm when we're off duty. Sir sounds so formal."

"Then please, call me Y/N."

"I'd be delighted."

BONUS:

If asked, Y/N wasn't sure she could clearly define the feelings inside her. Five minutes ago, Doctor Phlox had notified her and asked her to come to sickbay. When she asked why, he merely replied that Malcolm had injured himself. Without further hesitation, she had dropped everything and fled from her office in the direction of Sickbay.

She would only have had to work for another ten minutes anyway. Phlox hadn't had time to specify what exactly had happened to Malcolm and in her mind she was imagining the most horrific scenarios, from broken limbs to finding nothing but his dead, cold body in front of her. She stepped into the lift. "Infirmary." The low hum did not reassure her at all.

Nine quiet months had passed since their capture by the Licaurs, during which Malcolm had only volunteered to do the job in an emergency, when no one else was made to do it, to keep from getting hurt and to keep your blood pressure from skyrocketing.

Nine months in which, as agreed, you took things slowly. Weekly dinners, then twice a week, then three times. Over time, an occasional breakfast was added, and when Phlox cancelled, rarely a lunch. Y/N had been worried at first that she would keep him away from his friends, but Malcolm had reassured her.

He would still spend enough time with them and he promised that he would tell her if he felt he was neglecting his friends. After two or three months of eating together, they started spending time outside of meals. Every now and then she would visit him in the armoury or he would visit her in her office. Every time a report from the science department had to be brought to the bridge instantly, she volunteered just to give him a little smile.

After another two months, they had also started to meet occasionally in their quarters. To watch a film, read together, talk or just be in each other's presence. And in those nine months, she had fallen quite in love with the weapons officer. Really deeply. Maybe that was why her heart was pounding wildly in her chest as she walked through the doors of the infirmary.

"Doctor?" Instantly, Phlox's smiling face emerged from behind one of the screens. "Ah, Y/N. How good of you to come so quickly."

"Where is he? Is everything all right with him? Please tell me it's nothing fatal."

A laugh rang out from behind the privacy screen. "I'm fine, Y/N." As soon as the voice, dripping with British accent, carried over to her, the knot of fear that he might already be dead disappeared. And then, when the privacy screen was pushed aside and Malcolm emerged, she couldn't suppress a relieved sigh.

"It's nothing life-threatening," Phlox assured her reassuringly, putting his hand on her shoulder. "One of the relays exploded and Lieutenant Reed was hit by one of the pieces. Since he's your partner, I thought it would be good to call you. He just needs some bed rest."

She nodded, suppressing the urge to remind him that she and Malcolm weren't dating . Not yet. "Thank you doctor." The latter smiled broadly at her before turning to Malcolm. "Remember, Lieutenant. No exertion for the next three days. You are relieved of duty." Y/N could tell by the look on his face that Malcolm didn't like it, however he just nodded and walked over to her. She could clearly see that he was limping and struggled with herself whether to support him, but decided against it. Even though he sometimes didn't like to admit it, Malcolm had his pride.

To her surprise, however, he paused in front of the door, took a deep breath, his shoulders lifting so that his uniform tightened around his body, before turning to her with a shy smile. "Could you possibly help me? I would hate to fall in front of the other officers."

For a moment she looked at him, completely perplexed, before rushing to his side with a quiet "Of course." Instantly he put an arm around her, as he had done in the cell, and leaned lightly on her. She realised he wasn't leaning half his weight on her and she felt warm. Just the thought that he cared enough about her to worry that he was too heavy, which he probably would be, those muscles weren't made of air, stirred her heart.

They walked slowly, so as not to overload Malcolm, to the lift. She let him go first and after giving the order to the lift, he leaned against the wall. "Thank you."

A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "You're welcome." Silence. The doors opened and Malcolm wrapped an arm around her again and they continued on their way. Just outside his quarters, Commander Tucker came towards them. She gave him a curt nod so as not to seem rude, but he grinned at Malcolm.

"Don't chicken out this time, all right?" He nodded at her. "Lieutenant." With a cheeky grin he walked on and confused she looked after him. "Malcolm-?" He, however, avoided her gaze, his face deep red. "Never mind," he muttered, opening the door to his quarters. She walked beside him, still confused, and helped him sit down on his bed. He groaned softly and exhaled heavily. "I really should pay more attention." His laugh sounded forced.

"What did Commander Tucker mean just now?" She clasped her hands at her sides questioningly. Malcolm blushed even redder. "Never mind, my darling." He and she froze at the same time. "What-"

"Oh, God, I'm sorry. It wasn't my intention." Malcolm's face much more of a tomato at the moment. "I really didn't mean to. It's just been in my head for weeks, if not months, calling you that and- Oh my... that just sounds worse. Like I'm a possessive creep. I'm sorry..."

"Can you say that again?" Malcolm paused and looked up. What he saw took all the words out of his mouth. She had come closer, her eyes wide, her arms discreetly outstretched towards him, and he thought he saw a certain blush on her face. "What?"

Her face darkened even more and she took a few more steps closer. Her heart was pounding hard in her chest and she thought it could be heard even on the bridge. "Can you say that again? What you just called me?" Malcolm snorted and looked to the side. "Stop making fun of me! I-" Malcolm fell silent as she stood directly in front of him and took his face in her hands. "I'm not making fun of you, Malcolm. I meant it." Gently she ran her thumb over his cheekbone. "Please, Malcolm."

It was his eyes that widened now and he looked at her almost entranced. Gently he placed his hand on hers, which still rested on his cheek, stroking it and brushing her palm with his lips. "My darling." She closed her eyes and let her head fall forward gently. Warmth and a tingling exploded inside her at his words and she felt like she was drowning with love. Apparently Malcolm also seemed to have realised exactly what his words seemed to be doing, because she could feel a slight smirk against her palm. "My love. My sweetheart."

She opened her eyes and looked at him. He had straightened up and was staring at her out of his eyes, warm and loving. With his right hand he still held her left. Slowly his hand slid over her forearm, where the black infinity mark was still visible. Bending down slowly, he gently pressed his lips to her warm skin as light as a feather, never losing eye contact.

Her breath caught at the contact and her eyelids fluttered as if they couldn't decide whether to close in pleasure or stay open forever so as not to lose sight of this gorgeous man. Slowly he straightened up again and at that very moment she could stand it no longer. Gently but firmly, she pulled him towards her by the uniform.

Malcolm did not speak back, but even took a step closer. Carefully she ran her hand over his cheek. "I know we said we'd take it slow. Is nine months enough for you to decide what you want?" Malcolm couldn't take his eyes off her. "I think so."

And without much further hesitation, she pulled him close and placed her lips on his. Instantly she felt Malcolm place his hands on her waist and gently pull her closer. Her hands moved up and her fingers ran lovingly through his short brown strands as he in turn gently ran his hands up and down her waist, not going too far.

When they broke away, he pressed his forehead against hers and she smiled with closed eyes. "May I assume that Commander Tucker meant something like that?" He laughed softly. "Trip's been trying to get me to get off my ass for weeks to confess to you that I want a romantic relationship." She ran her thumb over his lips. "Oh really?"

"Mhhh." She kissed him briefly. "I guess I'll have to send him a thank you card then."

Malcolm buried his face in her neck. "Just don't, it'll only grow his ego." She laughed softly. "I want a romantic relationship too, Malcolm. But on one condition."

He raised his head. "I expect to be addressed only by such wonderful nicknames from now on."

"Do you, darling?" he softly purred. She heaved a sigh. "It's not my fault your voice goes with it so beautifully." "Especially my accent." Smiling, she buried her face in his neck. "Especially the accent."

"If that's the case, I guess I won't call you anything else, beloved."

"You won't hear any protest from me."