#this episode is such a gem like *screams into the abyss*

[ghostdrinkssoup]

okay so I watched ouef (s1 ep4) last night and I only vaguely remembered it as the episode with the lost boys and the creepy family dinner, but now that I’ve rewatched it I’m losing my mind over how much it actually sets up/foreshadows mizumono, especially thematically. considering this, it’s surprising how little this episode is talked about so I’ve decided I’m gonna unpack it myself because I honestly see it as mizumono’s necessary counterpart. it’s first half, if you will

so let’s talk about oeuf

I think part of the reason why a lot of early s1 isn’t discussed as widely as the rest of the show (especially late s2 and s3 in general) is because of the prescriptive use of genre conventions that underpin the “monster of the week” format that, upon first glance, makes s1a seem a little less interesting. it strongly follows the rules and expectations of the standard crime procedural that we’ve come to expect from a show like this: first there’s a murder, then our cast of characters go to investigate, slowly unravelling the mystery while learning some lesson along the way, until finally they catch the bad guys and the episode ends with justice prevailing, resolving the initial injustice of the crime. overall we’re left feeling satisfied, but it’s nothing to write home about

nonetheless, it is very important that nbc hannibal follows this formula in s1 because it allows it to meet audience expectations while also setting up the building blocks for its later acts, which, as we know, (mostly) abandons this scaffolding entirely. you can’t break the rules unless you know the rules, and s1 proves this by luring us in through its promise of convention. you could argue that, in its own way, s1 is the show’s own person suit

that’s not to say the “monster of the week” formula completely hides the show’s gothic side. beyond the show’s visual aesthetics (dark colours, artistic murders, etc) and the almost supernatural quality of will’s empathy, each episode/murder so far has had an underlying “fairytale-like” quality to it that’s achieved through the use of specific allusions/familiar images. first it’s will describing abigail as willy wonka’s golden ticket, then it’s the mushroom garden, then sleeping beauty wakes from her coma, and now we have peter pan and the lost boys. considering how the rest of the show plays out, especially s3 where hannibal literally describes the italy trip and his perception of life as a fairytale, this seems intentional to me. I mean, he and will literally adhere to the beauty and the beast archetype, with both fitting either role depending on what aspect of their relationship you’re looking at

that’s all to say, it’s notable that mizumono acts as the literal gateway between the familiar world of s1 and 2 and the phantasmagoric beauty of s3, stripping both its main characters and the show itself of their person suits, which isn’t as jarring as it should be due to the particular way s1 is structured

which takes us back to what I really want to talk about: ouef

the episode opens in baltimore, where will tells hannibal this:

as will speaks, we see his house, lit up and observed at a distance in the middle of nowhere, caught in the vast, misty darkness he describes. linking the house with the boat is important, since this dual image develops throughout the rest of the episode. thematically, ouef is about family, as is represented through the monster of the week: the woman kidnapping the lost boys and manipulating them into killing their families. but as we said before, this scaffolding is designed to set up character specific concepts and themes that’ll be relevant later. for now, will’s home is only a safe space for him at an observable distance — only “safe” because it looks like a boat at sea, which is a positive association for him

houses traditionally represent the self. it’s an image commonly linked to identity, both on a literary level and oftentimes when interpreting dreams. and of course, when talking about the house we naturally think of family. will can only appreciate the intimacy of both himself and his personal connections from an observable distance. he does not feel safe doing otherwise. it’s why his house is located so far away from the rest of society: he’s in hiding

from here, hannibal is quick to change the subject, stating that will “stood in the breathing silence of garret jacob hobbs’ home”, or, metaphorically speaking, hobbs’ identity. in episode one, will saw the truth of hobbs more so than he’s ever seen (or embraced) the truth of himself. he was not at a distance. he was not safe

then hannibal asks, “did they speak to you?”

and will responds, “with noise and clarity”

he then follows this by saying he “tried so hard to know garret jacob hobbs. to see him” beyond the police tape and dead girls and photographs, all of which he considers superficial details. this particular phrasing is significant, since it directly parallels what hannibal later tells will in mizumono after he learns of his betrayal: “I let you know me. see me.” this scene lays out the dominoes for this chain reaction, all of which results in s2’s climactic moment, by showing hannibal’s desire to be seen, even if he doesn’t fully realise it yet, and will’s desire to connect with others like himself, if they even exist. as I’ve said before, will does not think monstrosity and humanity are separate concepts

so, by wanting to see beyond hobbs’ person suit, which in of itself is a metaphor for conformity, expectations, and the false self, will set aside his own denial and discovered something very ugly about himself. he murdered hobbs in his own home and, for the briefest moment, caught a glimpse of the truth of himself. “see?” haunts will for this reason. it’s something he carries for the rest of his arc

it’s important that this all happened in the kitchen, but I’ll get to that later

but returning to the scene. hannibal asks will how he felt seeing marissa, the girl hannibal killed last episode. there’s an unspoken question here: did you try hard to get to know me too? did you know me? see me? would I ever allow you to do so? under the copycat guise, and the person suit, is knowing me even possible? as we learn in mizumono, the answer is yes

will says he feels guilty and I don’t think he’s lying here the same way he lied when he told abigail murder is the ugliest thing in the world last episode. there’s a difference between feeling guilt and feeling remorse. he thinks he caused marissa’s death, and he feels guilty because he knows he isn’t feeling (or reacting) the way he should be. killing hobbs felt good, remember? he saw hobbs, and in turn himself, with “noise and clarity” and had a moment of chilling self awareness he can’t shake. this is what he feels guilty about. it’s not about “not saving her” it’s about the threat of his self-destructive nature burning everything around him, which is what he fears. he feels monstrous inside, due to his own sense of vindication and inclination towards righteous violence

for the rest of this scene, I’m going to pick apart the dialogue in a kind of skeleton structure so we can take what information we need from what they say. their conversation goes as follows:

“sometimes I felt like we were doing the same things at different times of day. like I was eating or showering or sleeping at the same time he was.”

→ will feels like he’s doing the same things hobbs was (showering/sleeping/eating) even after he was dead because he’s now sensing hannibal, the copycat. or rather, his own copycat/foil. they’re already connected and they already feel the same (he feels like he killed marissa even though hannibal killed marissa)

“even after he was dead?” / “even after he was dead.”

→ so it’s hannibal he’s connecting to now, even subconsciously

“like you were becoming him?”

→ the introduction of the “becoming” motif which, as we all know, is a central theme and another reference to their foil dynamic (hannibal has already said he and will are the same). note hannibal’s tone when he says this: he’s speaking quicker, unable to stop questioning. there’s another conversation happening just below the surface of this one. he’s curious about will and his ability to connect, which was established earlier in episode 2

“I know who I am. I’m not garret jacob hobbs”

→ links back to the first episode where will, out of his own free will, chooses to shoot hobbs. remember that in the opening scene of that same episode he himself tells his students that, according to his own worldview, by understanding the murder, we understand the man. this isn’t a matter of confusing his identity with that of a killer: will knows exactly who he is, and that’s what scares him. he’d rather stay in denial

it’s also noteworthy that will’s refusal to be seen as hobbs, or a copycat of him, mirrors hannibal’s refusal to be associated with him too, as we saw in episode three when he tells abigail “I am nothing like your dad.” it implies that reading either of these characters as a mirror of someone else (other than each other, of course) would be a misstep. for both will and hannibal, hobbs is just another layer of the person suit. something that’s brutally stripped in mizumono, as I said before

we learn all this in one scene alone. like I said, this episode is complex and packed. the rest of the episode simply expands on the concepts introduced in this one conversation. I won’t go into every scene because this post would turn into an academic paper, but I do want to spend time dissecting a few key scenes which I feel directly link back to mizumono specifically and highlight why this episode is so important: the family dinner scene, hannibal breaking into will’s house, will’s therapy sessions with hannibal, and hannibal and abigail making breakfast together

how will analyses the family dinner, as well as what we learn from this scene, adds to our understanding of how these characters interpret family as a whole. after all, this episode is about “the lost boys” which, to me at least, will and hannibal both are. it’s their lack of real connection that causes them to treat abigail in the idealised way they do, similar to how the woman tries to make her own found family with the kidnapped boys (although this parallel better fits hannibal than will)

within his reconstruction of the crime scene, will sits at the head of the table, saying he’s “brought his family to this home invasion.” of course he’s impersonating the killer here, but this use of the home again (and family) is enough to pay attention to

power and control is also brought up in this scene. will says he controls the turners with “threats of violence. threats that turn to action” which is how hannibal operates (although more psychologically considering his demeanour, he doesn’t seem threatening at first and rarely loses his cool) but he can’t control people that way, least of all will. in the end threats of violence don’t even work, because the more worked up you get the less in control you actually are

will then shoots mrs turner, who, as we later learn, forgives the act since she loves her son. forgiveness (and acceptance) being synonymous with love literally underpins the conflict of s3, which is triggered by hannibal asking will if he’ll forgive him for murdering abigail in mizumono, but it’s first shown here, of all episodes, in the story’s set up. because of this, hannibal killing abigail and stabbing will recalls this episode, perhaps more as an echo than a direct link, but is strengthened nonetheless by this subtle build. added to this, it’s notable that the threat of violence here is also due to a type of betrayal (“family dinner, I wasn’t invited”) but the lost boy sits at the head of the table anyway, where he belongs, much like hannibal does, both at the end of this episode and as the “paternal” father figure throughout most of the show

as will says, this whole sequence portrays family values. twisted ones, but values nonetheless. it’s why I’m more inclined to connect this episode to the s2 finale than I am the s1 finale (although it’s still relevant) because this episode is so strictly about family. mizumono is the same but in reversal: the ideal family hannibal dreams and tries to take control of, since he had no control of his own as a boy, is shattered before his eyes

the other largely significant moment in this episode is when hannibal breaks into will’s house and pierces his thumb on the hook, tying the fishing/boat imagery back to the house again and foreshadowing will as the “lure” (his s2 persona)

what’s important about this scene is that hannibal enters will’s world (his isolated identity) to plant the evidence that’ll later frame him for all the s1 murders, leaving traces of himself on will so that, for a moment, will too becomes the copycat. again, not the exact truth of him or his nature, but a fragmented replica. inauthentic. fake. another layer of the person suit, except this time it’s hannibal’s forced on will

but what’s interesting is that hannibal also gets caught in will’s web. there’s a lot of focus on the hook specifically, and the camera lingers on the feathers, which hannibal takes the time to touch and look at, until finally, he pricks his thumb and draws blood

the irony is that in this moment, before the game even really begins, hannibal loses. he’s already hooked himself. we saw hints of this in the first scene of this episode, how his fascination with will is unlike any other attachment, or lack of attachment, he has, and it encapsulates the whole reason for his downfall: his attachment and obsession. it’s beyond his control (“you cannot control with respect to whom you fall in love”) and humanises him in darkly twisted way. he cannot control his feelings, and he doesn’t know what to do with this

his fate is sealed in this episode, but he doesn’t realise it until mizumono

again, the boat imagery is another interesting thing to note. fishing/boats/anchors are all introduced in this episode as mild, safe things (seeing the house as a boat makes will feels safe, wanting to teach abigail how to fish, hannibal saying will needs an anchor, will and his dad at the boatyard, etc) but fishing has an insidious side, too. one hannibal isn’t aware of. it has a meek mask, and in its own way, acts as another type of security. does will feel safe within his own sense of control, too? that’s the whole point of the person suit, isn’t it? it’s an important question, because the fallout is explored in mizumono. like I’ve said all throughout this analysis: everything here is being set up for a single climactic moment

will also sails to florence later in a boat he builds. he returns to hannibal’s home in s3, sitting in the kitchen with abigail’s ghost, but it isn’t home if hannibal isn’t there, so he sails to find him. I hate to say it, but will’s insane little sailing trip to italy is actually symbolic too if you interpret hannibal as will’s home, and by going to find him will, in turn, is also going home

the scene ends with hannibal sucking the blood from his thumb, before we transition to the blood streaked family portrait, opening the next scene. having the frame of hannibal bleeding being immediately followed by the bloody family portrait seems deliberate to me, since, as we know, he kills abigail later and destroys their “family” because will “makes him bleed”. again, tying the events of mizumono back to the family values introduced in this episode

also, in the script the sound hannibal makes when he sucks the blood from his thumb is described as “not unlike a quick kiss” which is an odd way to phrase it within the literal context of this scene, but makes a lot of sense when you consider what it means symbolically. it’s a small detail, but it recontextualises will “luring” him in as a romantic act, as well as a romantic betrayal

continuing on, what family means to hannibal and his desire to both connect with will and manipulate abigail are both interweaved as the episode progresses. hannibal says that “children transport us to our childhoods”, reframes the idea that will’s family, who will jokingly refers to as a pack of strays, also includes abigail (and without saying it, himself) and that the woman who’s kidnapping the lost boys is engaging in a “perversion” of motherhood. all these things evidently reflect hannibal himself, and the specific trauma he experienced losing his parents and, more to the point, his younger sister. we don’t learn the specifics of this backstory until much later on in the story, but his behaviours (and the trajectory of his character arc) are influenced by it regardless

in contrast, will doesn’t seem all that interested in the concept. he sees family as an “ill fitting suit” (yet another reference to the person suit) and it’s an entirely foreign concept to him (it’s foreign to hannibal too, since they’re the same, but I digress). still, he tries to connect to abigail anyway, but this isn’t motivated by a want for authentic family or someone who understands him, but rather an ideal. will doesn’t want to see the truth of himself, it scares him. he doesn’t want to see the truth of abigail, either. he doesn’t want to see her as her father’s lure (again, fishing imagery) but as something innocent and divorced from what he knows of himself. he ironically buys her fishing gear in this episode (although he never gives it to her) in an attempt to associate her with the same meek mask we discussed earlier. but as we know, this “safety” too has layers

buying abigail a gift also mirrors what hannibal says to will in mizumono: “I gave you a rare gift, but you didn’t want it.” the rare gift is family, which is given value when will says “I can’t give them back what they just gave away” in relation to the lost boys and their dead mothers. it’s again another part of the family values introduced in this episode: family is a rare gift, but it’s not something you can force, which both hannibal and will try to do with abigail (like the mother tries to do with the lost boys)

the “I can’t give them back what they gave away” is particularly important, since it implies permanency and an inability to reverse the action. the gift of family and connection is only rare because once it’s taken from you you can’t have it back; you can’t reverse time; you can’t take back control

this is the crux of hannibal’s entire arc. the belief that he is in control of his life, since, in his mind, he’s godlike and exists beyond human folly and attachment, underpins every single one of his actions leading up to mizumono. for this reason, it’s significant that the teacups are introduced in this episode as a means (and symbolic prop) to control abigail. they are later related back to time but this is meant to be a symbol of hannibal’s power. he directly says that he wants to give abigail her ‘power back’ earlier in the episode, but he’s really just empowering himself. he projects his attachment to mischa onto her, something he pretends doesn’t affect him and he is above of (his approach to dealing with trauma is clear through his interactions with abigail — he thinks she shouldn’t be immersed in the tragedy of the past and should just ‘move on’)

in truth, hannibal wants to recreate the moment of tragedy (both his tragedy and abigail’s tragedy) in order to reverse time and have the perfect family, despite being incapable of this. he’s trying to escape how his trauma makes him feel powerless by attempting to take power back, no matter how futile it is

he attempts to do this here, in his home, by making them breakfast, since in his mind by feeding abigail the same (and last) meal she had with her family, he is in turn engineering a kind of ‘rebirth’ for her. he reassures that although this was the last meal she had with her family, it’ll be the first with him, and tries to take away her bad memories by replacing them with positive associations. the reversal of time is even clear in how he makes breakfast for dinner, flipping literal time on its head for his amusement

for the audience, in this scene we learn he’s a more skilled manipulator than the woman who took the lost boys, since he’s forcing this “blur” between abigail’s father and himself through the use of psychedelics and fostering dependency. he wants to replace hobbs without necessarily becoming him. again, he’s his copycat, not his replica

the fact that this all takes place in the kitchen is also important. it’s the same place hannibal will later kill her, proving he can’t reverse time and he isn’t in control, and that she was never reborn, and he was never her father. and returning to the beginning of this analysis (I said I’d come back to this) will also killed hobbs in his own kitchen, where he finally sees the truth of himself. in mizumono, a reversal occurs: hannibal is now confronted with the truth of himself and, like will, accidentally finds something very ugly by exposing himself

the episode ends with will separated from the ‘family’ and resting with his dogs, similar to how mizumono ends with will lying in his own blood, alone. in summary, oeuf quietly introduces and foreshadows key plot, character, and thematic elements through the conventions of the crime genre, and it’s fascinating to me how many links can be made between this episode and the bloodbath in mizumono

even down to the episode title: the newly formed egg and all the consequences that are to follow its hatching

[yfere]

Shipping Calculus! Live Updates from C2E63

My initial personal notes for this sort of—ended, at a very specific part of the episode, which says something about how stressful combat was. Thank you to @Alarnia @softazelma @handelgamer and Meenah for helping out with data entry. Masterpost here, data entry here. 

Corrections: An additional +5 to Caleb/Caduceus from last week for “I guess I want what you want” from Caduceus. That’s a lot

-30 to Everyone/Detective Work. What’s that saying? Assumptions make an ass out of you and me? Despite their sincere and assiduous questioning and investigations, the M9 are made to learn that lesson the hard way, with everything they think they know from the scout to the “drow” to the blond dude to battle strategy turning out to be horribly mistaken.

+5 to Fjord/Caduceus as Fjord specifically inquires “Caduceus, how are you feeling” like the considerate worrywart he is before the Bright Queen meeting, and Caduceus getting very excited about finally having the money to pursue his personal Sword project for resident Sword-Swallower Fjord when they get paid. Caduceus supporting Fjord’s ideas, and joining the Micro Plan team opposed to Beau and Caleb’s Macro Plan Team.

-10 to Nott/Being A Team Player. On the one hand, this sweetheart offered to stay up all night on watch and take exhaustion so that her precious friends could get some uninterrupted sleep. On the other hand, she encountered a peak #Jenga moment, unfortunately not making the same WIS save Vax did, and stuck a bunch of arrows into Yasha. (also -30 to Nott/Yasha, with “I never liked you” and “Stop. Fucking. Hitting. Me.”)

+11 to Nott/Jester as Jester rescues Nott from the Charm! And is also hella charming herself, all “We never said that Nott” and playfully bumping into her when Nott talks about not trusting goblins (+2 to Nott/Fantasy Racism), plotting every type of Shenanigan together from tattoos to forming their own country, and shouting “HOW MUCH” at the exact same time when they get paid by the Bright Queen. They’re so much on the same page it’s terrifying.

+13 to Caleb/Fjord/Jester A pretty amazing week for this triad, between all three of them being Strategic Masterminds in effusive agreement with each other, over everything from being in the building to letting the attack go off without a hitch to murdering everyone in the meeting. Caleb and Jester together saving Fjord from his abyssal attempts to stealth, Caleb and Fjord’s Mutual Worrywarting over Jester’s long absence, and both Fjord and Caleb’s spellwork being employed to Save Jester on her moth mission.

+15 to Fjord/Jester but Fjord’s version of spellcaster-to-the-rescue was a lot more flashy, and he suffered being thrown around and bruised for her sake. That’s love. Jester notices this and thanks him, to his extreme flusterment, gives him credit for the Gold Chain Mercenary information, and plans with him as a Disguising Duo to fake being the hobgoblin and drow together, and we all know that those who engage in Jester Plots gain points. Points taken away because the spying/mole conversation was probably somewhere around the opposite of cute, you cannot convince me I’m supposed to enjoy listening to people discussing checking out moles for diseases. Like…no. That’s gross and not in the fun way.

+4 to Fjord/That One Gnoll as he gets thrown—head over heels! into the alleyway. Also of note is Fjord saying “You’re strong!” in what sounds like a suspiciously flirty drunken tone, while bruised and spreadeagled on the street. We learn more about you every day, Fjord.

+17 to Caleb/Jester as Jester tries very hard to employ her spellwork and Pass Without a Trace to Save The Caleb (#ItPaysToBeADamselInDistress), Caleb’s buffing as usual serving as an Expression of Affection, and Caleb coming up with Goth Moth Shenanigans for Jester to spy with, demonstrating not only his implicit trust in her but also how keenly he’s tuned into Jester’s preferred aesthetic, of all things. Turning to Jester first for help with the dragonborn, Jester elbowing the shit out of Caleb, and looking to Caleb to count out their gold like the fey child he is because she’s tuned into his quirks as well! Discussing making a coffee table together! Jester alone trying to play dumb about the Scourger business even as Nott Fuck-Secrets the Brave puts a blinking sign over Caleb when they’re with the Bright Queen, perhaps sensing (a beat late) that maybe Caleb isn’t super eager to talk about that all the time.

+7 to Yasha/Jester as even Moth!Jester knows how to make Yasha feel like a fairy princess, alighting on her finger like the soft and thoughtful gal she is.

+8 to Caleb/Fjord as they continue to work Very Well together with crowd control and murdering poor defenseless scouts and their horses. Fjord being very much “on the same page” with Caleb re: everything, except maybe the horse-killing, for which we may expect point losses as he makes plans to talk to that motherfucker (before or after he talks to that motherfucker, though?) But, use of Counterspell, that quintessential Cool Caleb spell? That’s Fjord’s magical crush to the rescue, though point loss for them all letting the “drow” get away anyway.

-4 to Caduceus/Metaphors. He thinks making barrels is like putting on pants, and gets horribly muddied. Then, just when he thinks he has a handle on that analogy, Beau changes it around on him and starts talking about wagon wheels! He just can’t win.

-6 to Caleb/Task Switching This boy does not respond well to sudden changes in plans. You tell him to stop the dragonborn, he will pick the Most Effective Method Of Accomplishing That, subtlety and consequences be damned. Does not seem to process that they are not in fact planning on murdering/imprisoning Moro and her employee when the fighting is over, because They Already Discussed This, That Was The Plan, Why Are You Changing The Plan?

+8 to Caleb/Caduceus. A tumbleweed of a week for these two, unfortunately, except that Caleb chose Caduceus for his Special Dunamancy Buffing (Skin Contact! Magical Expressions of Love!), and Caduceus finishing off the enemy Caleb had been trying and trying for ages to murder—appropriately, with fire. Proving their compatibility in how neither of them mind hanging around the smell of rotting flesh, which unlike moles is romantic because it’s Goth.

+6 to Beau/Yasha Beau attempts to grab arrows out of thin air to save Yasha, and hot damn would that have been a slam dunk in points if she succeeded. These two continuing their Battle Couple vibes, with Beau looking to Yasha to figure out what the hell is going on and supporting her in her fight against the assholes.’

+16 to Beau/Jester for flirty hellos in the midst of battle, and Jester instantly reassuring Beau that Dairon won’t kill her, she’s so powerful and strong. Beau thinking of only Jester in her Very Shouty Plotting, thinking Jester can totally singlehandedly handle the whole rendezvous situation by herself and with two spells, because Jester is That Cool.

+350 to Beau/Stress (and +20 to Beau/Nerdom) as Beau’s copious anxiety-notes come to the rescue while they speak with the Bright Queen. Anxiously admitting she “thought of that” to every doomsday scenario presented to her about Dairon, half-screaming about the possibility of being murdered, and shrinking into herself as she says that maybe—maybe she can get away with not telling Dairon everything. Caleb employing Frumpkin to scarf around her because she’s starting to become even more of a basket case than he is. (Also, +12 to Caleb/Cat-Shaped Creatures, with this, Frumpkin surveillance, and cat-beats-horse badassery)

+10 to Fjord/His Inner Bard because apparently rhyming is just his thing now—addicted after “How much time, Keen Mind?” we now have the instantly iconic “Analysis Paralysis” and the return of the horrible, wailing Song of Distraction which seems specifically calibrated to induce vertigo and shut down brain function.

+10 to Caleb/Essik as Essik repeatedly vouches for the M9’s trustworthiness and capabilities “…and my tutelage.” Because the Bright Queen definitely needed to know that last part. Said in a sufficiently odd tone of voice that the Bright Queen “gives him a look” because she knows her spymaster, and he has apparently been sucked dry of subtlety for this conversation

+12 to Jester/The Bright Queen because Jester is fixated on what the Bright Queen is wearing at all given times, apparently, and gets squirmy and blushy over blue shimmery gems, and she cannot bear to leave without telling the Bright Queen how beautiful her outfit is, gosh, and daydreaming about tattooing her, which would involve contact with Skin and the possibility for Undress as well. Jester also outs herself as secretly wanting the BQ to be her sugar momma, hoping for an expensive dress to be gifted to her in return for the information they shared.

+25 to the Mighty Nein/The Skeletons in Their Closet as the Mighty Nein channel Leaky Tap vibes by bedding down with a mystery corpse. This time, one they can eat, theoretically. Also, that business with the Scourgers, and Orphanmaker???

-100 to The Mighty Nein/Breakfast. It’s a pattern now guys. You don’t eat your breakfast, you get beat to shit. Learn your lesson and get your morning calories in.

[elibean]

elianna’s best anime of the decade!

best of is here, under the cut is a lot of word vomit and honorable mentions and stuff

2010- princess jellyfish

2011- steins; gate

2012- tsuritama?? idk i didn’t really have a best for this year

2013- uchouten kazoku

2014- barakamon

2015- noragami (this only works bc im including aragoto, the first season was in 2014 but shhh)

2016- 3gatsu no lion

2017- made in abyss

2018- yuru camp (probably, i didn’t thoroughly go through my 2018s but)

2019- i’m still behind on this, but as of right now it’s vinland saga and i don’t see that changing tbh

spoilers to follow for steins;gate and made in abyss!

EDIT: i’m editing this like 2 weeks later bc i cant believe i forgot the promised neverland. i don’t have anything intelligent to say other than GOOD. the mystery was great, the suspense was great, the character animation was great. all good. i’m reading the manga so i’m excited to see what’s next!

ok so summer 2019- given. one of those shows so good that it got me to read the manga (only a handful of shows have gotten me to do that) so. its good yo. the character drama and the way characters interacted with each other was so much fun to watch, and also like. canon queer characters, so bonus points for that. but what really got me was towards the end, when mafuyu finally sang his song and it just destroyed me in the best way possible. the raw emotion (when he screams in the middle of the song, just *chef’s kiss*), the storytelling, i just! so good. i’m so excited for the movie but also terrified because 1) they could fuck it up so easily and 2) non-manga readers will inevatibly watch it and then say given is “cancelled” and . there’s already enough people reading the manga for the first time and doing that i really don’t want more of them

spring 2011- steins; gate! slow start, but absolutely worth it. i was hooked after the ending of episode 1, and it continued from there. but what really got me was towards the middle, when mayuri died, and then there was that episode after of just scene after scene after scene of okabe trying and failing to save her. it was so emotional and raw and GOOD, and it really raised the stakes for the following episodes. so good.

there are multiple seasons so im not giving this one a year but- natsume yuujinchou! one of the most soothing, but also emotional shows i’ve watched. the found family natsume finds with his friends but also his adopted parents after enduring abuse previously is just. ;_; all the youkai stories are done so well too, and it’s just. very good. my favorite seasons were san, shi, go, and roku (three, four, five, and six)! i still haven’t watched the movie yet tho bc i’m never in the right emotional state lol (in other words: i’m never ready to be depressed for a full day afterwards)

fall 2012- this boy caught a merman. no explanation here, i love soubi yamamoto. also assume everything she’s made 2010-2019 is on here save for meganebu and this boy suffers from crystallization

fall 2016- a silent voice. duh. have you SEEN this movie? 

fall 2015- noragami! i’m completley biased but fuk u. i adore noragami and its world and its characters and its story and i. bones season 3 when

march 2016-  kanojo to kanojo no neko: everything flows. this is 4 episodes, about 8 minutes each and i cried so

summer 2017- made in abyss. look i know this show is contreversial and rightly so. it’s got Issues, and i can’t reccomend it blindly like i can some of the others on this list but god if i didn’t love it. the music, the background art (animated by a former ghibli animator!), the story, the lore, the emotion (when reg and riko had to say goodbye to maruk...when reg finally killed mitty, and nanachi’s wails afterwards...) its Good, what do you want from me

summer 2011- no. 6. good and queer. also when am i getting my reunion. god

fall 2011- chihayafuru. hoooooo boy are my thoughts on this one Complicated. i adore chihayafuru, the sport of karuta is fascinating and thanks to this anime i learned how to play the game and joined a karuta club. even participated in an official comp in japan. .....also got my ass handed to me and was so discouraged that i quit the game So

summer 2013- uchouten kazoku. a hidden gem! i liked season 1 more than season 2, but it was such a fun show!

spring 2015- kekkai sensen. this show was so much fun! remember how the last episode got delayed for like a month+. that was fun. again i liked season 1 more than season 2, but whatever. black was my favorite! and black and white’s relationship was so sweet ;_;

winter 2015- assasination classroom. this was such a ridiculous show, but a lot of fun. karma was my fave! cheeky lil bastard

winter 2016- doukyuusei. it was queer and good

fall 2016- 3gatsu no lion. yet again i enjoyed the first season more than the second, but still an amazing show. rei was such a good main character, and his battles with depression and just his inner-mind in general were so interesting to watch. 

winter 2017- miss kobayashi’s dragon maid. this was such a feel-good show. also involved found family and was also queer and good. like made in abyss it had Issues (and like made in abyss the issues were similar....sigh), but if you can ignore those, it was really good and wholesome.

spring 2018- liz and the blue bird. i went into this having not watched hibike (besides like 2 episodes back when the first season was airing), but naoko yamada is amazing so. the raw emotions were SO GOOD. also the fantasy scenes were so much fun to watch.

??? 2019- vinalnd saga. does this count? i mean it STARTED it 2019, even if it finished in 2020. anyway this was really good

[kaiju-z]

Seon Adventures Episode 15: Dicks and Danger

Following the dramatic conclusion of the Ogre confrontation and the moment of respite under the white willow tree, our party is now back on their feet, all but Burk well rested. As Luctan checks on everyone, he is somewhat worried for Burk, who had spent the entire evening awake and alert, now quite exhausted from this venture.

Checking with the little elf child, Luctan feeds him and, after what a good five to ten minutes of baby jokes (the best kind, really), the party take off on their way to Crystalgate.

By the point, where it would be 2pm-ish is when they reach said town, which, much to some surprised, is a place governed mainly by changelings. The most noticeable is that it just really springs out of nowhere, there’s not a forested area, little bit of trees every now and then. )So, basically, mostly fantasy California town.)

By when they reach the town, Belli even tries to make a baby carrier for Luctan, so he can have a hands free experience, carrying the little one onward. But that doesn’t go perfectly, seeing as they had been in motion during the trip. (But half a sling is still better than none! I believe in you, Belli!)

There are baby shenanigans along the way, trying to feed the crying baby, trying to change his diapers.

What the party immediatelly notice is that the town is mostly made of stone and brick and for every 4-5 buildings, there are tents. From what they learn, given the territory, the folk here work their trade with fishing and the occasional smithing work. It’s where Luctan sells the Ogre clubs, at that, to a beefy looking changeling woman, to whom he shows respect. (Also, fun fact, smithing in Seon is a lot more magical!  Local blacksmith use magic rocks and wheels. It’s how Ricardo, the elven blacksmith in the town/village Luctan recuperated in back in the day made the Evenchord sword).

With Luctan in his human form, he doesn’t really understand why the locals are weary of him, seeing as he’s not really aware of the discrimination the people had suffered from mankind over the years, what with changelings’ inate ability to shapeshift into other ‘noid races.

He learns of this, though, thanks to a conversation with an elderly changeling woman, whom he impresses with his politeness, kindness and udnerstanding. He hopes for a time, where they can walk around and not get second glances and suspicion from those, priviledged.

Luctan kisses the woman’s hand, which looks odd to the party, seeing as she had transformed herself into him to express physically what the “problem” was. But Luctan is cool with it. He chill. And carrying a baby, so there’s that.

(At some point, out of character we break down into a discussion on selling the baby, what the going rate would be and the like. The jokes were a plenty, but this gem from the DM will always stick with me: “People, who buy babies aren’t usually good people.” – Lauren, the DM)

At some point, Amelia goes on a walk. Then hears a sound of a tubby orange cat. She looks to the cat. “I would take a 1,000 arrows for you.” (she says in the best voice ever. We stan a legend). The cat nuzzles her and Amelia immediatelly takes the tomcat with her. A soft boi, she dubs “Archie”. ( Amelia is keeping the cat and if anyone has a problem with that, she’s gonna kill ‘em all. )

By the time she comes back to the carriage, after supplies and baby feeding is done, the cat is resting over her shoulders and Belli tries/fails to draw a dick on the back of Luctan’s jacket. (Luctan will remember this. Luctan makes an owl head turn.) And she also rpeats the funny with Mournimar. ( “What the hell is passive perception?!”we joke ooc-ic, when Mournimar, for some reason mentions that in-universe)

One very extatic Belli gives Amelia a ribbon to collar the kitty. And then she tries to pull on Mournimar’s tail, which immediatelly gives Luctan ye ole’ shell shock as he gets back behind the reigns of the carriage, alongside Burk.

As the party carry on, the red tiefling bonds withthe green goblin over their vengeance paths. Luctan apologizes to Burk for taking his kill from him, by asking Ficus to remove the tiefling. Burk is fine, either way, asl ong as the guy’s dead. As recompence, Luctan offers Burk a pick from any of the remaining three, aside of Landis. Landis was his to deal with. And Burk is fine with this.

On their way out of Pollum, on the first day on the Winding Path, they find a separation at the river. Based on the rainy temperature, this close to the ocean, the water’s more hydrated, so the roots are darker. There’s a lot more shade in the area.

As they make their way on the path, Perception check time.

With Mournimar’s 20, they immediatelly notice “it”.  A very large clump of roots on the way. Part of it seems to twitch. Resolute, the Tiefling Ranger makes his way to inspect.

It is the big mistake that almost costs him his life, however.

Because as he gets close enough, a root tries to grapple Mournimar, Mournimar manages to dodge as a bizzare looking skull comes out from between the darkened roots and looks him in the eye. With the ferocity of a graboid, by way of a messed up tentacle nightmare, the skulled creature screeches a large and mighty screech.

The tree is actually a tree monster. And it wants those tasty tiefling meats.

And this? This signifies the start of the fight. First in line is Mournimar (Both tieflings rolled a 20, but Mournimar’s passive skills are much higher, so it’s his turn first)!

Retaliating for the damage he took from the whipping vines, Mournimar immediatelly discharges his hellish rebuke and unsheathes his blades, striking wild and true, chopping at the creature. One strike, after the other!

No mercy with those sword strikes, as Mournimar occupies the attention of this hellbeast, while Luctan places the baby in the back of the carriage and charges forward, taking his full 30ft of movement, before aiming and discharging a couple of shots with his crossbow (DAVID CROSSBOWIE!!!)

He can tell, from some of the reading he had done. This thing is not Abyssal, like the Kenku. It’s a local realm monster. It’s nothing like he’s seen from the books, but judging by his knowledge, it doesn’t see, but feel movement.

He calls for Mournimar to get out of the thing’s range, believing his archery skills will do him better against it.

As Mournimar gets warned by Luck, he backs away, only to be caught by the thing. He feels his body pulled back and grappled. Necrotic power drains some of his essense as he gets flailed around like a ragdoll, screaming in horror.  . The thing looks as it almost gains back some of the damage it took. It tries to squeeze Mournimar like a slim jim, basically.

All the while, using it’s other vines, the beast tries to strike at Luctan, but the fighter dexterously dodges out of the way, only taking whipping attacks, as opposed to getting full blown caught by the beast.

Enraged, Luctan’s eyes glow as he makes a cutting motion across his throat and casts Hellish Rebuke. Though it does cause certain pain to the beast, it still retaliates, striking the fighter again and again, bludgeoning him, while he keeps his posture. If not for his armor, Luctan thinks at this point that he’d be far more bruised than what he’d be by the end.

Mournimar then gets slammed against the ground and is stunned until the creature’s next turn. As the action continues, Ficus and Morgan hear shuffling and alert the rest to the cliff on the right of their path. Soemthing’s coming. What that is, they’re not certain ,though.

Morgan, being the good dire wolf he is, takes the elf baby and moves a fair distance away from the carriage, alongside Rimefang and Archie, as their moms and dads go fo deal with this disaster.

Ficus makes a move, north west from Luck, where he gets his Dash action on to get to a point, attempting to throw some daggers at it, at a disadvantage. The dagger, the first one, misses, but the second one certainly hits as he sneakily strikes the creature, compensating for the initial failure...

Worried for her adoptive brother, - Belli gets close to danger and tries to cast sleep on the creature. Sadly, the thing is not yet close to a low enough damage and just shakes off the drowsiness.

A desperate Belli winds up giving Mournimar inspiration  with the help of All-Star.

The blue fist’s turn, next,  Amelia makes a dash and throws two darts at the creature, while maneuvering between it and the cliffside. Given the noise, she can definitely tell that anothero ne of these things is fast approaching.

Burk rages and charges the tentacles, throwing a javelin at the creature. With a small person fury, the creature gets struck. With the power of another javelin, he hits the fucker again.

With Mournimar unmoving, he gets lifted around and waved by the creature. Mournimar screams for help as Luctan charges in with shortswords East Ender and West Wounder.

Determined to rescue his taller friend, Luctan reverse grips the blades and leaps at the monster. Slash, slash, slash, slash! There is no mercy at the hand of the crimson fighter as he slices up the monster in a flurry. The closer he gets, the more he resembles a sentient blender, spinning the swords like a dual blade (or a light saber staff. Or Agni and Rudra from Devil May Cry 3), until he gets to the beast’s head.

In a swift motion, Luctan goes 3 for 3 and decapitates the monster, he would later learn was referred to as a Flurry.

Once the monster appears dead, Luctan wastes no time and carries Mournimar back to the carriage. And just in time as the second one climbs over and proceeds to contine from where it’s compatriot had begun.

Not noticing Amelia, however, it walks around her, allowing itself to be struck by the Air Genasi Monk .For that, the monster tries to catch her. Realizing the threat, it  It grapples Amelia and she fails to save herself as she suffers the same kind of damage as Mournimar had before her.

Seeing Burk as close by, it reaches and takes him in it’s grip as well, immobilising the raging barbarian. With it’s last attack, it attempts to catch the source of it’s companion’s death, but Luctan moves just far back enough to only feel the whipping strike of the Flurry.

Frustrated,  the monster screeches and a terrified Ficus goes to grab and yeet his daggers. Though, because he’s in range, he almost gets caught. The first time. He then gets hit and minimal damage to the helpful boy.

A desperate Belli tries to use Shatter on the thing, wanting to rescue her family and friends. With It takes 7 damage at the noise of “Baby Baby Baby”.

The tieflings try to convince Belli to step back. But she refuses to get out of the way. But she refuses to give ground. From where she is, all she can do is just give inspiration to Burk as Amelia’s attempts to fight in this grappled state.

Pulling her darts out, she flings them, one after the other, missing and hitting respectively, at the back of the thing’s roots, only causing it further anger.

Raging, still, Burk brings out the pain axes and starts going Lumberjack on the Flurry!  Strike after strike, after strike, after strike, Burk smashes the thing with the axe, bringing a hell of a lot of damage and by the end, with addition of the armor, Burk deals 33 damage. Though injured, this pisses the monster off all the more.

Amelia manages to free herself, thanks to Burk’s distraction, but this all the more inconveniences the green ball of rage, as the attention on him keeps him from suceeding as well.

Leaping out of the carriage, Mournimar makes some distance, sheathing his blades and pulling out Savon’s Bow. The bow, gifted to him by the centaur of the same name.

Thanking Luctan, Mournimar aims and fires arrow, after arrow, sending them flying true into the tangly body of the horror show the party was having to deal with right now.

On Luctan’s turn, he starts chopping like a madman. Several brutal strikes with both East Ender and West Wounder, missing only twice

The angry creature attacks with, appropriately, a flurry of tentacle attacks.

Amelia gets smashed, Burk gets grounded, Luctan gets whipped, but not grappled and poor Ficus gets captured and critically knocked around by the beast’s powers.

Limp, in it’s grasp, Ficus goes unconscious and steps close to death’s door.

Belli refuses to let her older brother, her last remaining blood family, die!

With the power of her healing words, she brings him back to consciousness and, now very muc pissed off by the abomination’s horrific actions so far, she mocks it. Viciously. With all the force that the Vicious Mockery entails as the creature just. Looks legitimately downtrodden by her commentary and releases her from it’s grip.

With her free, Luck begs her to move back to safety as Amelia can, but only throw her darts again and again. The impact causes a crack to appear at the back of the beast’s skull, forcing it to shriek wildly and madly.

It flails, both Amelia and Burk, forcing the monk into an unconscious state and Burk to suffer all the damage he can, due to his gripped and stunned self.

In retaliation, Mournimar fires the bow again and connects with one of two arrows. 

And it is then that Luctan brings the end to the battle.

East Ender and Westwounder in hand, he starts jumping up the thing’s tentacle limbs, cutting, slashing and chopping as he closes in on the monster’s head. And much like it’s twin, he removes said head after a spinning slash attack.

The monster falls in a gore of it’s blood and vines, while Luctan lands. He wastes no time and runs over to Amelia, who, along with Ficus, have suffered strange black scarring from the monster’s attacks.

Luctan pulls out his Greater Restoration potion and feeds it to the blue monk, bringing her back to consciousness, before taking her back to the carriage.

Eveyrone comes together at their vehicle and the party proceeds to make mild recuperations as they try to get their bearings, over what had just happened.

Arguments go around between Mournimar, Belli and Ficus over who should drink potions, with the boys much more wanting her to have herself a drink. All the while this happens, a vengeful Rimefang flies over to the remains of the second Flurry and gives it a good slapping with his tail as payback for all the hurt it had put on his green papa.

While Belli brings out Orion as a comfort animal for herself and Amelia, alongside Archie’s presence, Luctan makes sure to calm the elf baby with funny faces and voices, seeing as this had been the second time the little one had to deal with terrifying noises and the sounds of violence.

He manages to calm him down, before handing him over to Amelia.

Tired, but determined, he goes to inspect the monsters for any possible loot or identification. He eventually returns, having collected Amelia’s darts and Burk’s javelins, handing them to their respective owners, before he brings out the amulet he had found on one of the things.

Possibly from a previous meal, they identify the amulet as belonging to a follower of Keemis, the goddess of  Birth and Death. A snake, eating it’s own tail, the cycle of life.

Luctan decides to keep the pendant for now, until further prodding, as they collectively agree to just. Get the fuck out of here.

He takes the baby and the reigns, accepting the thanks from his friends. Though they were not necessary. It was the right thing to do, of course. Dive in head first and chop like a mad hatchetman at these monsters, all to free his fellows.

With four heads now occupying the Bag of Colding, Luctan decides to ask the next town over about a follower of Keemis going missing or something along those lines. Maybe get some feedback on the monsters themselves and if there is something they need to worry about, regarding Amelia and Ficus’ injuries.

It takes a while, but at some point, along the way, they reach a hill, servicable for camping. Tired, bruised and beaten up, but victorious, they settle down for the evening, with a fire and food, deciding on the turns of watch service.

Luctan and Amelia go first and, while everyone gets situated and napping, Amelia approaches Luctan.

Amelia thanks Luck for what he did during the fight. He just says she’d do the same. During their conversation, Luctan admits that he doesn’t follow any of the gods. Legal or Illegal. He doesn’t appreciate their inactivity and allowing things to happen as they do. He muses on how they became gods and on the future he wants to bring to the little one. Amelia agrees that there needs to be justice for him and that they will do the best they can.

He thinks of the amulet he has, considering to give it to Amelia. But decides to hold onto it for now. Seeing as he speant his for on her,  Amelia hands Luctan a Normal healing potion (2d4+2).

As their watch ends, Luctan brngs Mournimar up and awake to have a go at night watch.

With the two sleeping, Mournimar has a conversation, bonding with Ficus. They discuss today’s battle and the pain they had experienced.  Mournimar is at least glad that he will know how to fight them from this point onward.

Nodding,  Ficus thanks Mournimar for protecting Belli and gives him a thumbs up, awkwardly.  Honestly, Mourni would give his entire life for Belli, ok?! He’ll make sure she gets her happy ending.

Matter of factly, Ficus tells Mournimar he set up an alarm system, around the area they resided, in case someone tried to attack them again. (Hell yeah, Alarm!)

They agree that there is too much cult activity, yo.  The two bond over their family woes. Mournimar wishes his father was still alive. Having Mourni’s backstory is not fun. He hopes his dad miraculously survived and he just didn’t stick around to see if that was the case.

Mournimar has his head stuck in the past, Ficus states. “Don’t let the things you had make you forget what you have now.” After this wisdom from the Half-Orc rogue, the two seperate for rest times. Ficus evidently still very sore from all the damage he took. And Mournimar tries to eliviate some of that, curing the man of some wounds.

Burk’s watch comes next and frankly? He isn’t impressed by the time he spends awake. It’s nice, quiet and peaceful. Or as he would consider it - boring. With a sleepy Rimefang at his side, Burk just waits until dailight slowly approaches, to wake Belli for her turn, seeing as she always usually takes the last one, for her chef duties.

And creates French Toast. NARAH TOAST!

With the party waking, they can agree on a few things.

They still feel stiff from the previous night, they are much closer to Crystalgate... And they feel they’ve learned somethings, along the way.

Why?

Because the party is now Level 7!

Previous Episode / Next Episode

[temptation-narnia-chronicles]

From Upon the Golden Thrones

Episode 13: Yearning

     Great claps of thunder shook the whole of Cair Paravel as bolts of lightning illuminated the sky. A knot formed in Peter's stomach as he struggled down the hallway, muscles tense with desperation. Blood pooled on the marble floors. He couldn't afford to lose this battle. He couldn't stand to face defeat. He needed to be strong. He needed to push himself. The great doors of the castle burst open as the High King dove into the darkness, scouring the treeline for any sign of her. Nothing. She was gone, but she couldn't be gone. There was no way. He needed to find her. Mustering all his strength, he catapulted himself into the woods, clinging to tree trunks for support. The wind whipped wildly at his face, his eyes tearing up and his throat running dry. Not even the inclement weather could stop his search.

     Peter stumbled into a clearing, falling face-first into the mud as he gasped for breath. Another crack of lightning occurred overhead. He squinted up at the sky in dread, as if threatening the earth to challenge him with even more obstacles. And then he saw her, the shadowy figure cloaked in red. Unmatched, unfathomable, and unattainable. She stared at him with glowing eyes of white, levitating above the ground. Knotty antlers sprung from the roots of her dark, billowing hair, like that of a stag. Her body was drenched in absolute blackness save for the shimmering stone at her chest. Embedded in a wooden box held near and dear, the strange gem cast a warm glow like that of a sunset in summer. Compared to the gloomy atmosphere, it seemed highly out of place.       A scream tangled in Peter's throat, but not one of fear or anger. Rather, it was a scream of pain. A scream of longing. A scream of desperation to retrieve something cherished that had been long since lost. However, his throat refused to produce any sound. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he struggled to pull himself across the ground and toward her. The being just watched with cold, dead eyes, expressionless. One might've mistaken her for a statue had her hair and clothes not fluttered in the wind. When he was finally close enough, Peter extended his arm out, straining his muscles, in an attempt to take her hand, to remind her of everything she left behind, to convince her to come back. Before he could even touch her, he was drenched in darkness and the world disappeared from beneath his body, sending him tumbling through the vast abyss of nothingness.       "Your majesty!" a voice shouted, violently tapping a pointer on the desk. Peter snapped awake, blinking up at the faun standing before him. Professor Arcadian was not amused. "Since you seem so keen on sleeping during our meetings, I suggest you reschedule for a time when you might perhaps actually be awake."       "S-Sorry" he mumbled, gathering his papers and fixing his hair. The others shifted uncomfortably.       "I hate seeing him this way" Lucy whispered to her sister from across the table. Susan nodded.       "I don't think I've ever seen him so distraught before in my entire life" the gentle replied.       "It's been two weeks! I would've hoped he'd feel better by now" Lucy sighed.       "We have to remember, Lu, Peter was very much in love with Eilonwy. She left unexpectedly, so Peter is bound to suffer some heartbreak, however long that takes" Susan explained. Glancing back to her brother, she shook her head pitifully. The High King had been reduced to nothingness in the wake of Eilonwy's departure. A tiny ember of rage burned in the recesses of Susan's chest. She knew the huntress was selfish but never thought she'd stoop to such inane levels of cruelty. Good riddance, she thought to herself. We're better off anyways.       Later that afternoon, Lucy caught a glimpse of Peter upon the balcony staring blankly off into the woods. Her heart ached for him but unlike her brother and sister, she wasn't about to just stand by and let their eldest brother spiral into insanity. Sucking in a deep breath, she gathered her courage and stepped up beside him. "Afternoon, Peter. Lovely day, isn't it?" she greeted. Peter simply grunted. Pursing her lips, Lucy crossed her arms in thought before adding, "You know, we've all been rather worried about you lately. If you need anyone to talk to, me and Susan and Edmund are always here for you. You know that, right?"       Truthfully, Peter didn't want to talk. He just wanted to sit in silence and ignore the world. What he wanted more than anything was for Eilonwy to come back to him, to confess she made a mistake and that she loved him dearly, to accept his proposal and for them to skip off into the sunset together happy as can be, but he knew that was never going to happen. So in the meantime, he just desperately wanted to stop existing for a while. Not die, necessarily, but just stop existing. Press pause on the entire world and crawl into a very dark and very secluded space until he was feeling well enough to face life again, if he ever would.       Lucy was in no way satisfied with her big brother's silence. For the past fortnight, it had been nothing but dismissive waves, sleepless nights, and half-eaten meals. She was getting sick of his sulking not because she felt he was being petty and uncooperative but because she so desperately wanted him to realize he needed help and to ask for it. He was digging himself into a deep ditch with an insanely unpleasant destination. She didn't want to see him kill himself over the loss of a girl. He had fought and won battles. He was stronger than that. He could, and would, handle this. She was certain of it. So long as he sought the help he so desperately needed.       "You know, Peter, I know you're tired and you're upset but you haven't been a very good king lately. You've been neglecting every single one of your duties, just as you did when Eilonwy was sick" she stated sternly. Then, softening her gaze, she rested a gentle hand atop his and added, "I know you miss her, Peter. We all do. I know exactly how you feel but...but that doesn't mean we can't go on living our own lives."       At this, Peter jerked his head around to face her. "What do you mean you know how I feel? Lucy, nobody knows how I feel. And nobody ever will." Despite the harsh edge in his voice, Lucy was just pleased that he had finally said something.       She rolled her eyes, punching him lightly in the arm. "You underestimate me, Peter. I know exactly how you feel because what you're feeling right now, that empty aimlessness, is exactly how I felt when Aslan left. I didn't know how I was supposed to go on without him there guiding me every step of the way. I didn't think I was strong enough to do any of this without him by my side, holding my hand like I was a baby. But here I am, and I'm doing fine without him right there. Besides, I know he's not completely gone anyways. Wherever I go, he'll always be there. Maybe not in person but he's always with me. Right in here." She pointed to her chest and a soft, genuine smile spread across her face, cheeks blushing. "I know it's hard to see it now, Peter, but Eilonwy will always be with you so long as you hold her memory in your heart. Whether she does come back someday or not, you'll carry your feelings for her with you always."       As Peter listened to his sister's words, something inside him shifted. He wasn't sure if he felt better or worse but he was certainly feeling something. "How do you know he's with you? That he's always there in...in spirit?" he asked slowly, cautiously, quietly.       Lucy gazed off into the distance, unsure of how to answer. "I can just feel it. I can feel him watching over me. I can feel how proud he is of me, of all of us. It's not something you can touch or even hear inside of you, it's just there. I don't really know how to explain it" she spoke. Granted, she knew Aslan and Eilonwy were both very different entities, that Eilonwy was not nearly as powerful and supernatural as the great lion was, but she hoped that at least the feelings of accompaniment were the same perhaps in the same way someone carries on the memory of those who have passed away. "You know, Peter, maybe it would do you some good to visit the library and read some of Aslan's scriptures. I'll admit I've been sneaking down there myself to read some of them, especially when I've been feeling upset missing home or my friends or even the professor and his big old house. Somehow reading about Aslan and his work makes me feel better. I don't know, maybe it'll make you feel better, too."       "I don't know about that, Lucy..." he replied hesitantly. "This is...different. This is relationship stuff I don't think you'd understand yet."       "Excuse you!" Lucy replied, insulted. She crossed her arms and huffed. "I understand plenty, Peter! You know how mature I am. I'm even the tallest in my class!"       "I don't think height directly correlates with maturity, Lu" Peter remarked, but then sighed and softened his tone. "I just...it's hard to explain the difference but loving someone the way I loved Eilonwy is very different than loving someone the way you love Aslan. We both cared very deeply for each of them but...but Aslan is...well, he's like a mentor. No matter where you are, he always knows where you've gone and what you've done. Eilonwy...she's not like that. She doesn't know what all we're doing when she's not here and likewise."       The valiant queen paused a moment to chew over her brother's words. She was beginning to see the difference. It was the same way in which their mother missed their father when he went off to war, she presumed. Never knowing what was at stake, what her beloved was doing or if he was even alive. It was terror and uncertainty, walking on a tight rope over a tank of crocodiles ready to snap. "I think I understand..." she replied slowly. "But she might come back someday! I can't imagine she'd leave forever."       "I just can't believe I let her slip away" Peter sighed, burying his face in his hands. "I'll never find anyone who even comes to close to her ever again. I swear, she was the one I was meant to spend the rest of my life with. We had chemistry, there was something real between us, and I loved her. I swore she told me she loved me, too. I don't think I'll ever fall in love with anyone else ever again." Running his hands through his hair, he looked up to stare longingly at the vast expanse of forest stretched out before him. "If only I could go after her" he whispered.       "Well, why don't you?" Lucy suggested, tilting her head.       "I'm the High King, Lu! I can't just get up and walk out to go searching for someone when I don't even know where she went" Peter replied, exasperated. "I've got duties to attend to."       "Duties that you're not exactly doing the best job of fulfilling at the moment, Peter" Lucy reminded him. The magnificent rolled his eyes but ruffled her hair playfully.       "Well you're not doing your duties right now, either, are you?" he chuckled, shaking his head. Not that Lucy had nearly as many responsibilities as he did. She was still a kid and therefore had a far lighter load than the head of the tetrarchy.       The littlest Pevensie furrowed her brows, displeased with the insinuation, but knew her brother was right. In fact, his statement was a grave reminder that she was supposed to meet Susan in the grand hall that afternoon to help with interior design for the orphanage. "Do you think maybe you could at least consider my suggestion, Peter? About Aslan's word? I think you might find it a lot more helpful than you think" she said as she stepped backwards toward the door. The High King didn't find much use in the act, but he couldn't deny such a sweet face. Waving her off, he flippantly replied that he would, watching her leave before turning back to the view with a thoughtful sigh.      Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Perhaps if he held it, it would numb the pain. Ten seconds, then twenty, then thirty, nothing. Peter huffed and gasped, threw his pillow over his face. In the silence and solace of the night, his thoughts seemed inescapable. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw her face staring back at him, childlike eyes and rounded jaw and gaunt features and monstrous brows. Something twisted and clenched inside of his stomach. Staggering to the bathroom, he collapsed in front of the toilet and heaved but nothing came of it. After a few minutes of hesitance, he leaned back against the bathroom wall and rubbed his face, wiped the cold sweat from his brow, ran his fingers through his matted hair. A sob caught in his throat that he refused to release. He was not going to cry. Not again.      Once his stomach settled, a voice suddenly echoed in the back of his mind. Come to me, Peter, it called, deep and ominous. Come and I shall begin to mend your wounds. As if in a trance, Peter suddenly felt something strong and magnetic in the pit of his chest drawing him forward. He rose and wandered down the hallway, following the sensation wherever it seemed to lead him, until he stumbled upon the large double doors of the library. Suddenly, everything seemed to make sense. He tiptoed inside, scared someone might hear him, and climbed the ladder up to a shelf filled with books about Aslan and his scripture, his creation of Narnia and the history of the land. I suppose it wouldn't be totally terrible to learn about what all happened here before we came along, he thought to himself, and then pulled a rather large tome from the shelf that read The History of Narnia.       The High King seated himself at a nearby table and began mindlessly thumbing through the pages, hoping to land upon something that caught his eye. The majority of the book consisted mostly of just outrageously small print coated in a fine layer of dust but then, turning the page, he suddenly stumbled across a vibrant illustration that immediately captured his attention. The image depicted a king not unlike himself, tall with piercing blue eyes and straw-colored hair. He seemed young, also like himself, which truthfully caught Peter off-guard. He hadn't expected any rulers of Narnia to be nearly as young as he and his siblings. The next page relayed the tale of the young king, who bore the name King Thaddeus, and the legend of his infatuation with a woodland nymph who they called Chloe. As Peter scanned the pages, fervently eating their words, a strong sense of understanding and comfort began to overwhelm him. He saw much of himself in Thaddeus's character, in his stubbornness and passion and desperation. Thaddeus nearly lost his life for this mysterious figure whom he so loved, and much to his chagrin, Peter saw himself in the horrifying early stages of the same path. He had a country to look after, of which he was the High King. There was no longer time for childish follies and romantic escapades. Sneaking the book into his robe (for he didn't want to lose track of it), he scampered back to bed as a newfound strength began to take root deep inside of him. His grief for Eilonwy was not completely gone, not in the slightest, but perhaps now moving on didn't seem so impossible. Perhaps now he had the confidence and the willpower to stand on his own two feet, to walk without her guidance, to rule without her beside him. For the first time in weeks, he slept peacefully that night.       Morning light cast the dining hall in a cool and ethereal glow as the Pevensies gathered for breakfast. Susan eyed her siblings with conviction as they waited on the High King, terrified of what they ought to find.       "I tried speaking with him yesterday" Lucy whispered. "He seemed really distraught. I hope he's feeling better this morning." The gentle and just nodded enthusiastically.       Peter waltzed into the hall with a strange and unnerving smile pasted upon his face. He greeted his siblings, filled his plate with waffles and delicious treats, and ate in a contented silence in which they had not seen of him in ages.       "Well, you seem like you're in a rather peppy mood today, Peter" Susan commented, refusing to look him in the eye. If he had fallen off the deep end, she was certain that distance was the smartest tactic to employ. The magnificent simply nodded with a grin.       "Are you alright?" Edmund asked, suspicion lacing his tone. "I mean, I assume you're feeling better but...what happened?"       Peter finally met the eyes of his siblings, placing his fists upon the table in a not at all violent fashion. "I had a lot of time to think last night" he began, "And I've decided I'm done with all this childish sulking." He was met with a series of wide eyes and questioning gazes.       "A-are you sure...?" Lucy asked carefully. She wasn't entirely convinced Peter was in the right frame of mind at the moment. She feared he was being hasty, shoving his emotions into the pit of his stomach in an attempt to ignore their hold. When she suggested he look to Aslan for help, it wasn't that she was pressuring him to feel better. She simply wanted him to open his heart and mind to healing. She never expected him to be cured of his grief overnight. According to their equally unconvinced looks, Lucy was sure  Susan and Edmund felt the same.       "I'm positive" Peter affirmed. "I've realized I've spent far too long neglecting my duties, and I don't mean just in the past few weeks. I've been neglecting my responsibilities from the very start and that's not at all fair to any of you. I'm ready to return to the throne and reclaim my place as High King again. I'm ready to rule completely, to devote my time to the wellbeing of this country."       Again, he was met with questioning gazes and wide eyes, even a mouth popped slightly ajar. "Peter, are you sure you're ready for this?" Susan asked tenderly, placing a hand upon his shoulder. "You know, you don't have to do this if you're not ready. Nobody said you had to do this."       The magnificent shook his head. "But I want to do this" he replied. "Better yet, I need to do this. I can't let myself wallow in self pity any longer." A growing confidence began to overwhelm him, spreading outward from his core. The corners of his lips curled up into a small smile as he nodded his head once and added firmly, "It's time I grew up."

[criohyer]

he was born in the darkness. decrepit for it, swamped riveted in it. he crawled out of hell on all fours to be pushed to the shadows where bricks of an abattoir house walled him inside; delivered to relentless vicious depravity to never forfend the dwell of sin and make rayless somber avaunt.

you hear the hooves of the devil echoing first before you see a man. only when you see him unwary he is exonerated from evil, the features of innocence take the place of the embers of hell. katerina looked into his eyes incapable to bethink of the cimmerian ghast of the underworld even so that romeo can taste of poison too.

all she tastes is the itch to cry out for him, speak his name, pull him from the blackened soot. she's weakened when he calls to her; the seas awakening. he goes silently like the clouds escaping. she will long for the rain to keep falling let it wash all her tears to the ground, his filth ridden fingertips smeared across her lips and wake in the arms of the dawning when he returns to her.

let her body collapse, erode among the fields silently, tainting resting upon her bones. with wings ascending, remembering his force, his taste and his destruction for she could use his stencils to create her own masterpiece of self slaughter. she would thank him for her suffering, the hole he ripped into her to the point of hollowness.

he wished for her light when all she wanted was to wither.

she tastes dirt at her burial and she can't get enough of it. she won't let him rescue her heart.

an angel espies at him, he inquires her what her pleasure is. he wants the redemption she can offer. she smiles, black tar runs down chin. her pleasure is ripping out the hearts of men that crusade the devils work. there is no mercy. aspergillum sprinkles holy water from the sky and he burns to death. a deep red garnet gem is decried out among fervent shades of vermillion bloodshed and darkness, near these dancing fleshes named daughters he led astray to his ravine of engorged palate; their bodies lost within the current after he infiltrated their alcazars.

his mouth waters for redamancy, he crawls into their graves just to demand their love even after he took their last dying breath. he won't let them rest even when they are gone. bezoar concretes in his stomach, a ritualistic fire scintillates past the splines of trees in a deep forest. he is a beast with eyes that smoulder with embers, privy at post where snow remains unthawed and untrod.

it's up to little red if she wishes to pry into his boughs, escapade tirelessly into her own deathbed of trees as she stares into the fringes of his dangers and imperilment. the temptation always lingering, she has an addictive personality and she wants to seek out the adrenaline rush.

he observes, numb to pleasure outside his own satisfaction. he pries for even the angel that banishes him. familiar with the primal language they practice. their songs are brutal sighs, wolfish wails, bloody and carnos. they too are terrors, priestesses to their tsaritsa, wildly levitating in weaves of laughter.

all lovers are liars you see and we are terrified for our separation from what we were born into the world with. our mothers so we seek that sense of attachment elsewhere, alike to being in the womb and we will lie to get such simple needs met as such as requited love. zadist, a needy child, who had commonly fell into a psychological state that was so immensely anxious, it was alike a intensified psychotic episode it resembled a protracted epileptic seizure when ever his mother left.

he often looked forward to when he went upstairs for the night and his mother would come in and kiss him goodnight. the moonlight would always be gloaming out through his windowpane and onto the wooden floors and a sense of peace to be in her company. but this never would outlast: she went down again so soon that the moment in which he heard her climb the stairs, and then caught the sound of her moth eaten night dress of white muslin, from which hung feathering plaited lace, rustling along the corridor, was for him a moment of sorrow.

after kissing him, she opened the door to go, he longed to call her back as he caught the scent of her perfume which he remembered to be the scent of garden flowers but he knew that then she would look displeased for this kiss always annoyed his father, who thought such ceremonies absurd, which usually followed with the words of "the boy needs to not act like a child," and she would beckon to his father's ideas to have her son outgrow the need.

to see her look displeased destroyed all the sense of tranquillity she had brought him a moment before, when she bent her loving face down over his bed, and held it out to him like an offering, for an act of unity in which his lips might drink deeply the sense of her real presence, yet instead in its place a sense of emptiness.

he feels her weight over his body when she slips him the poison, her thighs cradled over him and his hands are placed on the flesh but it tastes sweet and he is unsuspecting of the snare. he is already drifting into slumber roaming his mind into an unconscious dream of his mother gaunt, pale and screaming at him to find the meemies unto where he purposely constructed her insanity. she tasted his lies and cunning, will katerina? i love you. dulcet sounding words sink into his dream.

he wants attachment, to regain that loss any child is given when his mother separates from him, she says he loves him and he trusts her with the weight of his heart that is already splintering.

the liquid slides down his throat and it burns. spider fingers claw at the bed sheets, it feels like helpless attempt to gain control as he falls down a black hole at the bottom of which is an obliteration that nevertheless does not destroy the feelings of abject loneliness, of abandonment; it is the feeling of being nothing. nothing that still feels as it is nothing.

he lifts his frame up abruptly and quick when he wakes where he leans for the bedside table and begins to uncontrollably whooping cough, as if he is emptying his lungs. lethargic orbs are struggling to adjust to his surroundings, he feels a sharp migraine piercing into the side of his skull.

he turns to his right instantly and the sheets are unoccupied, rustled where she had laid. he feels his spleen break, and coal weigh onto his chest as his breathing pattern hyperventilates. he shoots up from seated position and throws the bedside table into the wall, his blood boiling from pain and choler. he feels his bile rise from his stomach, he wants to be sick.

in wide strides he looks for where she escaped, finds the bathroom and her blood running down the windowpane. he gushes for the front door, unlocks it in haste and smashes the frame to the side.

cast out inside the woods. savage and impenetrable obsidian darkness, it was cold. just as he always knew it. vast, and horrific as if all integral light sheathed from him and his eyelids had been sewn shut. vicious as he remembered. sentient foreshadowing a weary and secretive disposition that made one feel unprotected, an endless fear of agoraphobia becoming helpless in certain obscure spaces. muddy and windy, the dim granular numbing to his flesh.

an utter can be heard in the deep dark abyss, as if it is calling for him. that voice is familiar with him, as he is with the gloom. you will endlessly suffer.

he is running through bushes, sticks are scraping his flesh as he searches for her tracks she left behind. he doesn't stop until he sees her. he calls out for her, he's still disoriented from the poison, picks his pace up and she runs faster. he feels like his lungs are about to explode and his vision is psychedelic like he is tripping on drugs, still affected by the valerian.

he reaches her, grabs and rips at her clothes to pull her backward and his efforts prove to be worthless. he tries once more, captures her body into him and he shoves her into his frame from behind so he can secure her into him which she breaks free from.

he falls to the ground on his knees.

i'll find you. i'll find you, you think you can escape? i'll never stop.

crows cawed in the distance and he screamed into the dirt until his lungs were red raw. he hid in the devil's resting place and lurked in the shadows until a trace was found. the sun sprained to be black and the moon twisted to be full of blood, drowning the earth in hate with his hunger to have her pay. his fury torched through his flesh to the point of imperative scarring. he yearned to reduce the world into ashes. months had passed and he came across a newspaper article in europe where it stated in black ink that a man came close to his murder, he described his attacker as a young woman with a scar on her cheek.

he followed on her tail to where the attack happened and stayed until he found further trace. within time he found out where she lived. he broke into her home through her fire escape, smashing open a window where he crawled inside and waited for her until she returned.

hearing the front door to her apartment twist and unbolt out of its hinges, as soon as she walked into the frame and went to turn to close it, he appeared behind her and pressed his palm against the surface of the frame, pushing it shut.

"privet, katerina." in a soft whisper, he used his hand to wrap around her skull and force her harshly up against the wall to where her face hit the coarse brickwork.

leaning in close to whisper in her ear, he held her in place ensuring he caused her pain in the pressure. "you f***ing poisoned me. you gained my trust and poisoned me. did you think i wouldn't find you? i pick up on your scent like a f***ing bloodhound."

“i will drag you kicking and screaming back home if i have to, my krasivaya devushka. or i'll kill every last man that gets in my way.” he speaks in a hoarse cold tone but releases the pressure of her against the brickwall.

brushing up close to her closing the space between them where he began to admire her appearance, his fingers tangle in a loose strand of her tresses on her freckled chest to tuck it behind her ear. “why are you so terrified of me to run? the men that you run from, men like me that the world calls immoral are what show the world its own shame. you will always be fond of me. i represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit, detka."

"i don't want to be at the mercy of my emotions. i want to use them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them and all you do is make them uncontrollable, unpredictable. you make love something to hate. you are the epitome of what drains the earth of delight. but why? WHY katerina? why do you want me to suffer? the only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it. resist it, and your soul grows sick with longing for the things it has forbidden to itself. all you do is resist."

eyes averting to her shoulder where she cut it on the cabin window escaping, he traced the healed scar in its place. "and you pay for it."

"you reek of prey, katerina. you need me. you have sheer terror shooting through your body. you sure as hell couldn't kill that man in the news. you thought you could do this? you thought you could become a weapon? i'm your f***ing ammo. before you met me your worst sin was hanging from a noose in a church because you were miserable with your own pitiful f***ing existence."

[kaiju-z]

Seon Adventures - Episode 8, “6, they traveled”

aka. “Amelia’s Coochie Quest”

When we last left off, the party had left Menum, gained new equipment (weapons and armor) and met up with Samson at the fortress. From there, they set off on a journey that would take them to Heraia, with their closest stop being 5 days of travel to Tereresk

During the initial journey, on the 1st day, Luck shared with the party that there would be a fighting tournament in Crystalgate, during the Spring Welcoming Festival. He would also mention that “accidents” have been known to happen.

Samson, the druid of the Forestheart Bretheren, becomes the inadvertant camp maker during their quest and Mournimar does some stargazing, keeping mental note of the sky above, while Belli shows off her artistic skill to Amelia.

Their journey through the swamps has been troublesome, but they had managed. With Amelia’s impressive perception, of the passive variety, she notices something interesting on the 4th day of journey.

Between the trees, she sees a golden shape. She points it out to the rest of the party and a chas begins, which leads the lot of them to a tree, where the shape, which they quickly realize is a GOLDEN STAG, makes it’s stop. Amelia and Mournimar, as well as Samson quickly realize what this means. As Dyunficus, the deity of  Hunting, Trade, Craftsmanship and Agriculture has often been portrayed by the masses as a Golden Stag.

A follower of Dyunificus, Samson drops to his knees and bows, while the stag keeps his attention, for the most part, on Mournimar. He snorts, bows his head and then walks towards the tree, mentioned earlier.

“Entering the tree”, it dissipates. The party quickly investigate said tree and learn, through Belli’s Identify that it, much liek the stag, were divine. Mournimar finds 20 pieces of gold and five gems:  Amethyst, Carnelian, Garnet, Onyx and Topaz 

He shares his findings with the core party, giving each of them equal pieces of gold, while also sharing the gems.

- Luck gets the Amethyst.

- Belli gets the Onyx. And puts it on her necklace????

-  Mournimar keeps the Carmelian.

- Amelia gets the Topaz.

- So Burk gets the Garnet.

After this, they continue on their way and eventually reach  Tereresk. A more trodden, small town than anything big like Bavorum, Victrum and Rorum. It’s more of a stopping place than anything else.

While Samson keeps to the carriage, with Kevin and Killer, the rest go inside a tavern the chaos siblings find by Belli carrying Mournimar on her shoulders for extra vision.

Inside said tavern, Mournimar approaches a scarred man and tries to ask him a few questions, but doesn’t really get anything out of him. He, however, recognizes Belli. And tries to ignore her, which upsets the half-orc, who ends up sitting on the table, trying to get an answer from the man’s recognition.

It soon becoems evident to Belli that this is actually the changeling Kit, from Menum and the two agree to have a conversation at midnight.

While the shenanigans with those three occur, Amelia, Burk and Luck go to the old lady bartender, who just poors herself and Amelia some good liquor, noting the handful that the party can be to Amelia.

The nicest rum.

Luck makes the old lady’s week by giving her a gold piece for whiskey, Luck asks Burk some questions regarding his quest for revenge.

Burk’s clan was called “Cragreaver” and they hailed from the western part of Ermia, the country they were currently in, since they crossed the Aetorumia border. Burk bluntly asks Luck why he’s poking around, asking about his dead family.

Luck, in turn, answers that he too understands the need for revenge. And that even if Burk didn’t make them promise to help him with his revenge, Luck would've still helped.

From there Luck buys Burk a drink and gives off a sincere smile, for the first time since the party began their travel together. Then fucks off to get some fresh air.

At midnight, Belli and Kit meet up back at the bar, while the others are sleeping. The two bond over Ficus, Belli’s brother and friend o Kit’s, discussing the party in a positive light and the journey ahead. (Also Kit is scared of octupi???)

Two two girls are the same age,with Belli being 16 and Kit being 17.

Kit seems to have some history with the Forestheart Bretheren, as she recognized Samson, when they arrived in town. Belli offers her a place in their party,but Kit refuses, as she really doesn’t want to travel with a lawman, of sorts. (The Forestheart Bretheren are basically magic sheriffs)

Besides, Kit works alone and hasn’t worked with anyone since Ficus.

“Yeah, but he’s a dick, I promise I can be much nicer.” - Belli, a legend.

Belli gives her bow (the ribbon variety, not the weapon) to Kit as a keepsake, tying it all pretty on her wrist and she makes Kit Blush.  “This is my excuse to hold your hand.” - Belli, a fucking legend.

They part ways on good terms with Belli blowng a kiss to the changeling, leaving her a mumbling awkward blushy mess. And it’s glorious.

At around 4am, Mournimar wakes up in cold sweat having the realization that Luck talked to him in infernal, days prior after they took out the cult. He shares this information with Belli and the following day-

We get the comedy act of Mournimar trying to wake Belli up. Failing, then screaming and getting suplexed for it by the half-orc girl, much to the annoyance of Burk, who kicks down their door and proceeds t oslap them both upside the head. This party is wild.

Belli writes down “0 days since our last nonsence”

While Mournimar gets everyone food, Luck goes to get Samson to join them for breakfast, quite surprised to find him having not taken the carriage to the local barn. It would seem that Samson is very awkward about barns (maybe because that’s where he slept off downing centaur moonshine?!)

Once they eat and buy supplies from the locals, they continue on their journey, with Mournimar and Belli joining forces to teach Luck all new kinds of CUSS WORDS! In other languages! Infernal, Undercommon, Orcish, Elvish and even Abyssal!

The chaos siblings successfully corrupt the angel boy.

On the first night, Mournimar continues teaching Luck all kinds of new things, with the fighter enthusiastically taking notes, mindblown by these new findings. All the while Belli sets the mood with illusionary butterflies and Amelia hearing a voice in her head, which worries the rest.  Everyone thinks they broke her.

This prods Mournimar and Belli to get Luck in on helping them with gathering food and flowers for Amelia. Make up for all the stress they put her through, right? Luck eventually agrees and the two form a pact on this matter.

Before the morning comes for them to perform said pact’s requirements, Mournimar soon gets greeted with by a Direwolf, during his turn on watch.

He speaks with the big wolf and bonds with him, learning his name is Morgan.

“Those, who find me in the forest call me Morgan.”

Luck is introduced to Morgan, as he was on the watch before Mournimar and had only barely gotten to sleep, when all this was transpiring.

Once morning comes, Belli joins the “Morgan Appreciation Squad” as she feeds him two bacon balls and basically becomes his best friend. (Morgan is a bit of a Brutus, you see).

It doesn’t take them long during their hunting trip to find and take out a deer with the expert skill of Mournimar’s archery and Morgan’s. Well. Teef. Belli picks flowers for Amelia, while the boys bond over archery. Luck had seen his master, Therodin, use the bow before, but he himself never quite mastered that. He was more of a close range fighter. A bad one. But a fighter non-theless.

Belli plans to make a flower jacket for Amelia, though sadly it would take too long to make it. So instead she makes an amazing flower crown for her (NAT 20!!!) As well as a leigh of greatness.

They return to the rest of the party and introduce Morgan.

Then Burk starts wrestling Morgan, much to Mournimar and Belli’s dismay and Amelia’s annoyance. Only Luck and Samson keep quiet and watch, while Burk has this struggle for dominance and eventually succeeds.  Burk whispers in the wolf’s ear “I’m the Alpha here.” And lets Morgan go.

Burk’s logic was simple. As the only person in the party, who has experience with Dire Wolves, his clan having used them in the past, he wanted to settle the record straight with Morgan.

As things quiet down, calm down even, Belli presents Amelia with the flower crown, from which Amelia loses all color in her face and walks off. Crying. Luck goes after Amelia, while Belli runs into the forest, followed by Mournimar.

Each duo have a heart to heart and eventually come back to the party’s camp, Luck having learned some things about Amelia’s past. Burk is bitter, Samson is confused.

From this point, the party continues their travel. Amelia can tell Belli’s still upset and, wearing the flower crown, sit beside her, having a good conversation about what happened earlier. Amelia makes it clear that Belli did nothing wrong and she had to step away, because, as she puts it:

They’re all just really messed up.

To which Samson takes offense, coachmanning the carriage with Burk.

“Look me in the eyes and listen. You didn’t do anything wrong. They’re lovely and I love them. Thank you very much.”

Belli insights Amelia. She knows she means it. Belli relaxes a little and nods.Then she apologizes for her behavior. The girls hug each other.

Luck hugs his daggers. He can’t stay mad at them. (yeah, with all the bad rolls Luck’s been having the past couple of sessions, he has been having an existential crisis of the ironic nature of it all. But he can’t stay mad at his new daggers!)

Once they reach the next small town, everyone but Luck and Amelia go to the tavern, much to the tavern owner’s dismay, since Mournimar brings Morgan with him.

In the carriage, Amelia asks Luck to help her with her hair, having taken note of how well Luck’s been keeping up with his own style. Luck agrees.

(And at this point I made my brother and mother angry at me, because shenanigans happened. Because I rolled bad on doing Amelia’s hair. And I started using all my Lucky rolls.

Once I re-rolled.

Twice I re-rolled.

THRICE I RE-ROLLED! I spent all my damn Luck for the day so that I don’t accidentally scalp Cloudmom!

With the last re-roll I succeeded on doing her hair right and had me a loud scream. At like. 1:30am??? Woke my mom up, freaked my bro out.)

Eventually the lot of them go to bed and take off the next day. It doesn’t take them long from this point to reach the township of Heraeia. The first major stop of the session!  For the first time since Menum, they reach a town with more than 12 buildings. The thing that stands out the most from a distance is the large temple. Heraeia almost seems close to bustling, you know?

The party splits in four.

Mournimar and Belli go to the local temple, a major building that stands out from a distance.

Burk and Luck go to the shady part of town for a fight club experience, asking around about their quarries.

Amelia goes to a tavern, “The Tipsy Goose inn”, where she had agreed to meet with Nelatha, the bard, and Samson chills out with the horses.

Mournimar talks with a tiefling cleric with leaf charm jewelry on her horns, while Belli gets watched over by a half-elf priest.

Mournimar discusses his life with the tiefling cleric. His tragic past involving the cult of Potencia, his blood rages, the Death Cult, as well as meeting the Golden Stag and the jewels. She is floored by Mournimar’s story about Savon giving him the bow after beating the Death Cult.Mournimar asks if this is a positive sign from Dyunificus. She answers that the gods are known to usually interfere when something’s happening on a macro scale.

Mournimar has regrets. He wishes, some days, that he wasn’t born a tiefling. But the cleric assures him that there is no shame in being born one, like them. “ It isn’t who we are, but how we react to who we are. “

While this happens, Belli talks about her religious experience with the half-elf, who’s. Well. Tired af, man. He needs a vacation, travel the world. Belli helps him more than he helps her in this instance and it’s amazing.

She  encourages the half-elf cleric to go for a walk and live his best life.

While this happens, the melee weapons boys go to the purple sector, the shady part of town, having been pointed to a particular bar. The two find a tavern, a bar called “The Leaking Spoon”. As they approach two men come flying out the window, mid-brawl. Said men laugh it off, hug it out and go back inside the tavern.

Luck and Burk promptly go in and scan the area for their targets. Who aren’t here. It’s very mid-western saloon after a bar fight. People randomly beating each other up.  12 heads snap in Luck’s direction as he says “Quite the Lively place.

Burk shouts at the lot staring at them: “ WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU LOOKING AT?!”

“ A fucking dick, obviously!” he gets in turn.

Then things return to the usual with people laughing, drinking and fighting. Burk gets a fist swung at him and gets into combat with one guy, while Luck tries to get to a high ground. Only to drop off the table, for being too heavy with the plate armor.

Getting laughed at, Luck runs for one of the five guys he notices and dropkicks him off his chair.

The fight proceeds in ridicilous fashion, with Luck breaking in his new armor, but doing a miserable job at fighting, having not been used to this kind of stuff.

Burk, however, is doing amazing.

Until one racist calls him Luck’s “pet”. Which causes Burk to snap and beat the ever loving shit out of the man, leaving him for dead, before exiting the bar.  “You’re my bitch now.”

Luck, having nothing available to help the man, follows after Burk.  and Luck tries to think of a gameplan. As they walk they find the man shambling away and he begs for his life. Luck pays him off with his two remaining platinum pieces. “Nothing happened. We go our own ways. Fix yourself up, get your wife something and don’t be racist towards goblins.”

WHILE THIS IS HAPPENING!

Amelia visits Nel, who is performing in the tavern, flautisting the shit out of the scene. After her performance and money collecting, Nel opens her eyes and sees Amelia. They hug it out. Nel expected the others to be with her, but Amelia assures her taht eventually they’ll all find their way to the tavern, with Mournimar and Belli soon joining them.

Until that happens, though,the girls get drinks from Tommin, the Halfling, who is able to read the room.

The girls discuss their time apart and the job that Nel acquired for Belli. Though she would prefer to wait for Belli, until giving further details.

Amelia mentions that they took out the death cult recently and Nel is impressed.

“They may be a pain in my ass sometimes, but they all are wonderful people.”

The chaos siblings enter, discussing their temple adventure. Nel and Belli proceed to talk about the job, which will take place during the Winter Solstice festivities. And introduces herself to Belli properly.

Belli knows Nel’s name, since Amelia talks about her a lot.

“Oh, does she?”

Mournimar is having a shit eating grin over this. Fun times.

Maybe we’ll have loads to talk about after we’ve met.” Nel is grinning the same way, basically.

Everyone admires Amelia for her strength or booty. “Sometimes both.” - Nelatha.

As the session draws to a close, Amelia and Nel go to drink, catch up further and do the do.

And this ending, as decreeded by Mournimar and Belli’s players, gives birth to the episode subtitle of “Amelia’s coochie quest”.

END OF SESSION!

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