#this is my first time drawing travie i hope i did not fail him ...

[greenapel]

i love them so much the 1 foot height difference sillies ^_^

same shirt sighting below :3

[pucksnsticksnhockeyboys]

green frosting

summary: hockey players aren’t known for their domestic skills, and Nolan isn’t an exception.

word count: 2.7k

note from the writer: day four! enjoy this and the other fics from my Christmas masterlist! tagging @bqstqnbruin​ @broadstbroskis​ @nazkadris​ @laurenairay​ @justjosty​ @sorryjustafangirl​ @tayella13​ @wastedheartcth​ @writinghockey​ / add yourself to my taglist

Each year the Christmas season seemed to arrive sooner and sooner until suddenly halfway through October you were seeing videos of people intricately decorating holiday cookies that you had no hope of recreating. Still, you saved the videos for reference when you finally had a moment to do some Christmas baking.

When Nolan told you he had the night off, you jumped on the chance to have him to yourself and told him to meet you at your apartment. It had been a few days since the last time you had gotten him alone as a result of hockey, and you were excited to have him over.

And for the chance to make some cookies.

When Nolan showed up at your place, expecting a night in with a movie and takeout, he wasn’t expecting you to already have on your coat and a bright smile. He was dressed casually, grey sweats and a dark Flyers hoodie, and hat on his head that did little to hide the length that was his hair. Still, despite the relatively plain outfit, he never failed to make your heart skip a beat.

“Hey, Nols.” You grinned, pushing yourself up onto your tip-toes to press a kiss to his cheek in greeting. If possible, his cheeks flushed a little bit more red than usual, and you couldn’t help but feel a pang of victory in your chest for drawing the reaction out of him.

See, you and Nolan weren’t technically anything more than friends. But you had been towing the line between platonic and romantic for far too long, and it seemed almost inevitable that things were going to tip in the direction you desperately wanted it to soon.

“Hey, where are we going?” He questioned, voice deep and laced with confusion as he watched you lock your apartment door after shutting the door.

“To the store, I figured we could make some Christmas cookies.” You explained, turning to face him with an excited smile. Part of your giddiness was for the cookies, but mostly you were looking forward to having the chance to see just how poor Nolan’s domestic skills were. “Only if you want to, though.”

“Sounds fun.” He said earnestly, slipping his hand in yours and tugging you in the direction of the elevator he had just arrived from before you got the chance to second guess yourself further. And really, he couldn’t say no when you were smiling at him and he was desperate for any chance to spend time with you.

“We’ll see how fun you find it when we actually start baking.” You teased, knocking him with your shoulder and drawing a chuckle out of him. The elevator doors opened, and you pulled him in with you and without a second thought he crowded you against the back wall after hitting the button for the lobby.

“You know, I missed you a lot on this last trip.” He mumbled, his hands coming to settle on your hips as he backed you into the wall of the elevator. It was things like this that told you that you weren’t the only one that saw the trajectory of your relationship heading into something much less platonic.

“You didn’t miss me on the other ones?” You couldn’t help the chirp, but thankfully it did little to discourage him. Instead, his grip tightened and his smile widened just a bit more. You wondered if he was going to do it then, if he was finally going to kiss you and end this months long game of cat and mouse you had been playing.

“I always miss you.” He conceded, but before you could comment further, the elevator doors dinged open to reveal the lobby and you separated, albeit a bit reluctantly. You were still smiling, though, wide and teasingly as you slipped your hand into his and tugged him out of the elevator.

It was easy to find his car parked on the street and when Nolan opened your door for you, you couldn’t do anything to stop the grin that found its way onto your face. The ride to the store was quick and spent mostly in conversation about what the boys had gotten up to on the latest road trip, and before you knew it he was parking in front of the grocery store you regularly visited.

“And I swear Teeks didn’t leave my room until after midnight, I had to kick him out.” Nolan explained, drawing a chuckle out of you at their dynamic. They seemed like polar opposites, Travis was loud and animated while Nolan preferred to keep to himself. Even so, you had cracked his hard exterior and now were so close to getting to his heart, you could tell.

“Sounds like you guys had fun.” You told him with a smile, climbing out of the car after he parked at the nearest grocery store.

“Wish you could’ve been there, though.” He said, and you chuckled at his sappy words and the way he extended his hand out for you to hold as if it was second nature. You gave his hand a quick squeeze, a silent reply that you, too, wished you could have been there.

It wasn’t exactly late at night, but the grocery store was nearly empty, music playing loudly and you couldn’t help the rush of excitement you felt as you remembered your purpose of the trip. Eagerly, you grabbed a basket and pulled Nolan further into the store.

“They’ve been playing this song since November.” Nolan groaned, following after you and letting you take control. It took you a moment to realize what he was talking about, but then you heard the familiar tune of “Sleigh Ride” by The Ronettes playing through the store’s speaker.

“Grinch.” You huffed playfully, knocking your shoulder into his arm and drawing a chuckle out of him. “C’mon, I have most of the stuff we need but I need cookie cutters, food coloring, and confectioners sugar.”

“Confectioners sugar?” He repeated, as if the words were forgein to his ears and he’d never heard of it before. You chuckled at his cluelessness, somehow his complete lack of domestic skills and knowledge endearing to you.

“Powdered sugar, Nols.” You teased, but before he could make a playful commnet back, you were distracted by the display of cookie cutters and other Christmas baking supplies. Nolan let you pick, knowing that whatever you decided he’d go along with—and not just about cookie cutters; you had him wrapped around your finger without even knowing it.

He watched as you absentmindedly hummed along to the Christmas song playing through the store. He wondered how he could have gotten so lucky to be the one you were late night baking with, the one you spent most of your freetime with. He wanted to be yours, he wanted the label and the ability to show you off without fear of you thinking he was overstepping.

Hell, he already thought of you as his girl.

“Anyone home?” Your voice dragged Nolan out of his thoughts, hand waving in front of his face with a playful grin on yours. Your smile widened as he grabbed your hand, threading your fingers together all while rolling his eyes at you. He was suppressing a grin, you could see it in his eyes and the way the corners of his lips twitched so you considered it a win and tugged him in the direction of the rest of the items you needed.

The sugar was an easy find but the food coloring was on the very highest shelf and Nolan would be damned if he passed up the opportunity to tease you. He acted as if he wasn’t going to grab the box for you, arms crossed over his chest and a smug grin on his face as he encouraged you to just grab the box. It was all in good nature and you found yourself giggling through threats until he finally caved and pulled the box down for you.  

His hands barely left you the entire trip, fingers threaded through yours or palms on your waist as he stood behind you at checkout. It was as if he couldn’t help himself, and you didn’t mind one bit. You could get lost in him for hours, so as soon as you settled back into his car for the drive back to your place, you reached over and grabbed his hand, lacing your fingers through his. You spotted the grin on his face, but before you could tease him for it, he pressed a kiss to the back of your hand and set your hands in your lap.

Nolan made sure to grab the bag out of the backseat before you had the chance to, and as you walked into your apartment building, you wondered what you could have possibly done to get lucky enough to have Nolan in your life. He was sweet, funny, and devilishly attractive.

You just wished he’d ask you out, or at the very least kiss you.

“So, where do we start?” Nolan asked after setting the bag on your kitchen counter.

“Grab the bluetooth speaker out of my room, please?” You asked sweetly, moving around your kitchen deftly and pulling out all of the ingredients you’d need to make the standard Christmas sugar cookies. Nolan saluted playfully before slipping out of the room, returning just as you pulled the eggs out of the refrigerator. You handed him your unlocked phone and told him to connect it to the speaker and went to work in grabbing two large bowls and the mixer.

“What playlist?” He asked from his spot leaning against the counter. You turned and grinned at him, taking an extra second to admire how effortlessly attractive he looked while just standing in your kitchen.

“The Christmas one, Nols, we’re making Christmas cookies.” You told him as if it was obvious, a grin on your face that assured him you were just teasing. He rolled his eyes playfully, but otherwise complied and within seconds “Mistletoe and Holly” by Frank Sinatra was playing through the speaker.

“Alright captain, what’s first?” Nolan asked, setting your phone down and stepping towards the counter where you’d set up the ingredients.

“Okay, we need to measure these and put them in this bowl.” You told Nolan, gesturing to the flour, baking powder, salt, and one of the bowls you had gathered. Putting Nolan in charge of the flour with little more than the amount he needed and a threat to not make a mess, you went to work measuring the other ingredients. Unsurprisingly, you finished your tasks before Nolan, and watched with a giggle as he focused intently on getting the exact amount of flour you told him.

The rest of baking went similarly to the start, you told Nolan what to do and he did it with brows furrowed in concentration and a seriousness you hadn’t expected him to have when you asked him to bake with you.

“So now we just wait?” He asked for clarification, looking between you and the sheet of cookies you had just put in the oven.

“Mhm, and when that sheet is done we cut out some more until there’s not enough dough to make more.” You explained to him, leaning against the counter to admire him. There was flour on his sweatshirt and on the brim of his backwards hat from when he adjusted it. You were cleaner, but you were convinced that it was impossible to bake anything and escape without getting some flour on you.

The song switched just as you finished talking, the familiar intro to Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas Is You” filling your kitchen and making a grin appear on your face. Nolan recognized that look, and instantly he was pushing himself up from where he had been leaning against the counter to pull you into his arms and dance dramatically in your kitchen.

He spun you around and you giggled wildly, your moves anything but graceful. He was smiling wide, too, and you decided that it was your favorite sight. The music continued, switching to it’s more upbeat tune and allowing you to dance even goofier, much to Nolan’s delight. You tried to force him to match your energy, but the most you got was a dorky shimmy after you pouted playfully.

“Don’t act like you’re not having fun.” You sighed, breathing a little heavier than you probably should have been after dancing. A mellower song played after Mariah, shifting the mood from goofy and light to a little more serious, though the smile on Nolan’s face helped grow yours.

“I never said I wasn’t having fun, I’d just rather watch you.” He explained, settling his hands on your waist and pulling you closer. Your heart picked up in pace, the look in his eyes one that had you excited, one that had you hoping that maybe he was finally going to kiss you.

“Charmer.” You muttered, if only to fill the silence. Nolan chuckled at that, but he didn’t seem to want to make a comment back, and instead he began leaning his head down, slowly, as if he was giving you a chance to back out. You weren’t going to, not even a little bit, but the very second you tilted your chin up to silently ask for a kiss the alarm on the oven went off, loud enough to have you jolting away from Nolan despite how much you wanted to stay in his arms.

You tried to ignore the way he groaned in defeat as you turned away from him to pull the first sheet of cookies out of the oven. Nolan started on the next batch, rolling out the dough like you had taught him. You had a system going, and soon enough all the cookies were cooled on the counter and there were various bowls with different colored frosting. You had red, white, green, and yellow for the Christmas trees, stars, and candy canes cookies you had cut out.

Unsurprisingly, you were much neater than Nolan, and in no time he had frosting all up and down his shirt. Halfway through carefully frosting a Christmas tree, you turned around to grab your phone and change the song, only to catch Nolan grinning at you.

“You’ve got a little something.” He mumbled, smiling at you gesturing to his cheek. You reached a hand up on your own face, brushing at the area but somehow missing whatever was on his face. Nolan chuckled, stepped forward to help you out. He swiped his thumb across your cheek, and pulled back his hand to show you the green frosting you had been using to decorate the Christmas shaped trees with on his thumb. Parting his lips, he sucked the frosting off with an obnoxious hum, causing you to roll your eyes.

“Are you going to kiss me now?” You asked, voice confident with a teasing lilt and it was all it took for Nolan to duck his head down and connect his lips to yours. It was a long awaited kiss, one that had been built up by months of teasing glances and not-so accidental brushes.

You wanted to thread your fingers into his hair, but your hands were still covered in frosting so instead you gripped his already frosting-stained shirt in a bid to keep him in place. He was cupping your face, holding you just as close and you felt as if you were on cloud nine. He tasted like green frosting, so much so you wondered if he had been sneaking some from the bowl instead of just the small bit he had licked off his thumb.

You weren’t sure who pulled back first, but you were both smiling at each other and it was clear the feelings you had for him were mutual. You pushed yourself up onto your tip-toes to press another quick kiss to his lips before settling back onto your feet.

“The frosting tastes good.” You teased, and somehow Nolan’s cheeks turned rosier.

“Are you sure we have to finish this? I think we should just keep kissing.” He suggested, and though the offer was tempting, you rolled your eyes playfully.

“Cookies first, then we can do your idea.”

[trashforhockeyguys]

Don’t Hold Me -16- Carter Hart

A/N: Alright...here we go. It’s beginning now. So, I’m sorry. Like very very sorry. But um...enjoy? As always all previous parts are linked in my masterlist.

You sat alone in your dorm room, trying to figure out what you were meant to do. Three days had passed since the break in. Carter was trying to give you space, he was trying his hardest not to smother you. He seemed to understand that you needed to process what was happening now. But he missed you, and you missed him. 

You weren’t sure how this was supposed to go. You didn’t know how you were supposed to keep him safe, but still keep him close. You loved him, but you loved him too much to let him stay. 

Not as you stared at the note that fell out of your textbook a few days prior. He sent one warning, he told you what was coming. He wanted to torment you, let you know he was there. He was everywhere, always watching, just waiting for the perfect time to strike. This was a game to him, a game he was going to keep playing with you until you didn’t have anything left. 

You felt like the walls were closing in on you. Like the whole city was closing in on you. But there was nowhere that you could go to get away from this. It would follow you everywhere...he would follow you everywhere. You had to figure out a way to keep him away from everyone you cared about. You had to keep them safe.

You pulled out the note that had fallen from your textbook just a few days before.

YOU CANT IGNORE ME FOREVER

He already knew how to get to Carter, he knew where Travis lived. He found you at school, and likely had a way into your dorm. There was no running from him this time, he had you cornered again. The only option you had was to play along with his game, whatever it would be. 

You jumped when your alarm went off, reminding you of the class you had in fifteen minutes. Kora was already gone. You’d have to walk by yourself. What if he was waiting for you? You wouldn’t put it past him. In truth, you were terrified, more so than you had been since he showed up here in Philly. Because now you knew he really meant it, he was going to do everything he could to burn your life to the ground. 

You had three unread texts from Carter, a missed call from Travis, and both from Ethan. They were all worried, and this time they had every right to be. This was real now, there was no more denying that he was here and he wanted to wreck it all.

Taking a deep breath, you gathered all of your books and shoved them into your bag. You had an art presentation at the end of the week, and all of your pieces no longer seemed as bright and clear as they once were. Shadows covered all of them, looks of worry seemed to make their way into the eyes of those you drew. 

You tried to keep your head down as you made your way into the correct building. You tried to avoid everyone you could. Tried not to think about how he could be watching you right now, or watching Carter or Travis. He could have someone back home ready to mess with Ethan...he could be planning anything. 

Maybe this is what he wanted, he wanted to drive you insane before he struck. Maybe he was just waiting until you were at your weakest again so it would be easier to finally finish whatever plan he had. 

“Y/N! Hey, I’ve been looking all over campus for you!” Kora exclaimed as she ran into the small lounge in the student center. 

Your head snapped up from your sketchbook, hours passed since your last class. You were trying to get out some of the feelings that were trapped in your body. Drawing seemed to be the easiest way for you to do that, even if all you could do was draw all of the people you loved scared or in pain. 

“Oh..yeah sorry. I um- I guess I lost track of time.”

“The guys were worried sick,” She plopped into the seat next to you, “Travis wanted to know if you’d feel better staying with him.”

“No...I need to stay here,” You replied slowly. 

He would do something if you went to Travis’ place. Somehow staying here in the dorm seemed like the safest option for everyone. He couldn’t get into the dorm or know which room you were in. This felt like the best option to keep everyone safe. 

“You’ve seen him again, haven’t you?” She questioned.

You nodded slowly, “He’s everywhere. Kora...stay away from any strange guys, okay?” 

“Y/N….”

“I’m fine. It’s going to be okay,” You forced a smile, “I should go, there’s a game tonight. I can’t miss it.”

“Are you sure you should go?”

You weren’t sure at all. In fact you were pretty sure that you shouldn’t go at all. But Carter and Travis were expecting you to be there. You were at every home game. You couldn’t start missing them now because they’d know something was really wrong. 

“I’ll be fine. Promise.”

Even if you didn’t believe it yourself, you had to make everyone else think that you did. You wanted them all to believe you were fine, so that they wouldn’t worry about you. You couldn’t handle them all thinking you were one step away from breaking down again. That was really the last thing you wanted.

The boys finally stopped looking at you like you’d fall apart at any moment, you didn’t want to go back to that, you couldn’t. Not after you had to go through so much to make sure they didn’t see you as that girl anymore. But, even now you could feel yourself starting to slip back into it all. Back into the fear.

You quickly changed when you got back to your dorm, your fingers ghosted over all of the jerseys and shirseys you had. Some of the shirseys dated back to long before you met Travis, and a lot of them had been handed down to you by Ethan. They were all so worn in and soft. You pulled out the oldest one you had, which was nearly worn out. There were holes along the collar and sleeves, and it was three sizes too big for you, but it never failed to make you feel safe. Ethan gave it to you when you left for school, just for that purpose. You quickly pulled it on before slipping Carter’s jersey over top of it. 

You really didn’t want to go, you wanted to hide for the rest of the night. But you knew both Travis and Carter would be here and ready to bust down your door if you didn’t go. So you forced yourself out of the dorm and into the waiting cab. You made your legs move towards the area and through security. You tried to act happy and carefree as you sat with everyone else. You tried...because that's all you could do.

“How are you doing? The guys said Carter’s worried,” One of the wives asked. 

“Oh, I’m fine! Finals are just coming up soon,” You shrugged, trying to get off of the topic. 

They didn’t need to know you were scared of your own shadow, and all that could go bump in the night. You were scared of what you knew was waiting for you, somewhere in the city. He was probably here tonight, ready to strike the moment he could. The only thing you knew to do was try and minimize whatever fallout would come on the team. 

“Are you sure? That breakin was horrible.”

You nodded and forced a smile, “They’ve fixed the issue with security, and the apartment is fine. I really have been busy with classes that’s all! Promise.”

You hoped you convinced them. You didn’t want to answer any more questions about how you were doing. Carter was worried, you knew that, just like you knew that Travis was worried too. There wasn’t much you could do to relieve their fears. They knew you too well. You were sure Nolan was just as worried. And Ethan...you didn’t even want to think about how he must be going out of his mind. You hoped Kora was doing a good job of making sure he thought you were fine. You didn’t want him getting on a plane and coming back out here again. 

Your skin was crawling during the first period. You knew someone was watching you somewhere in the arena. You looked to the bench, none of the guys were focused on you. Travis and Nolan were on the ice, Carter busy in net. It wasn’t a member of the team. That only meant that you were being paranoid, or he was here. 

Half way through the second, you got a text. You were scared to look at it, having the dreadful feeling in the pit of your stomach that it was going to be him. How he would’ve gotten your number didn’t even cross your mind. He was crafty, and when he wanted something he made sure he could get it. Especially if it meant he’d get to ruin you. He made that very clear. 

GET AWAY FROM YOUR BODYGUARDS IF YOU'RE SMART. THE SMALL TEAM STORE BY YOUR SECTION. FIVE MINUTES 

It was like ice water was poured all over you. He really was here. He knew where you were, and the fact that you were surrounded by the families of all of the players. There were arena attendants right by all of you. You had a feeling Travis and Carter asked for one of them to keep an eye on you while you were at the game, just so they could feel at ease.

You looked around, trying to figure out what to do. It was the middle of the game. None of the guys could help you. You looked up to the player box, where a few injured or scratched players were watching the game. You didn’t know any of them enough to ask them to come with you. This would have to be something you did solely on your own. Which was exactly how he wanted it.

“I’ll be right back,” You told the girls around you, “My parents want me to give them a call. I guess my brother didn’t really explain what happened very well.”

You forced another smile, this one hopefully just as convincing. It seemed to work because none of them questioned as you got up. They didn’t watch you as you walked away, there didn’t seem to be any worry at all. It was just as you needed it to be. 

But, that didn’t stop your own heart from trying to pound out of your chest. Your ears were ringing as you climbed the steps towards the concourse. There was no telling what he wanted from you this time, but you could only hope that you would make it out okay since you were in public this time. You were in an area where you were known. It was no secret that you were dating Carter, or that you were like a sister to Travis and Nolan. 

Your legs shook as you walked along the concourse towards the team store. You just wanted all of this to be over. Life was so different before he came back. There was a period of pure bliss with Carter. And before he was even a big part of your life, you were so happy and didn’t know any different. Life was good. Life was great. Everything was new, and exciting. You didn’t know much about pain, or being hurt by people you loved. Now you did...and it was because of him. 

“Look at you, wearing his jersey.”

Your whole body went cold. He was standing just before you, dressed in black like he used to. For just a moment you hoped he wouldn’t even be here, you hoped he was just playing with you again. But he was here...and how he had you in his trap. 

“He’s my boyfriend, he wanted me to wear it.”

He smiled, but it wasn’t kind. Nothing about him was kind. Nothing was comforting, or felt right. Every part of him was now a warning telling you to run as fast as you could. But your feet stayed right where they were. You didn’t move any closer, and neither did he. You were in a stalemate. 

“You look like shit.”

You let out a bitter laugh, “What do you want?”

He took a step closer, watching you like a predator stalks its prey, “Oh, Doll. Don’t you want to play a game? You used to love our games.”

You shook your head, “You loved them. I never had a choice. You forced me into all of it.”

He cocked his head to the side, “I remember you used to beg for more.”

You hated who he made you then. You did all that you could to keep him with you because he’d convinced you that no one would want you after him. He made you into something you hated because you felt like you didn’t have a choice. He stripped away everything that you were and made you into his own personal little toy...his doll that he could play with.

“You made me into that person,” You hissed, “You broke me.”

He laughed, such a mincing sound that you wished you’d never have to hear again, “Oh Doll, I was just getting started.”

“Zachary, please stop,” You begged, “Leave now and I won’t tell a soul. It’ll be like you were never here.”

“And miss out on the real fun? Oh no I don’t think so. We’re just getting started.”

“Zack, please. I haven’t done anything. I left, I moved on. I haven’t been home in years,” You felt tears burning your eyes. You tried everything to force them back, “I gave up everything because you nearly killed me.”

“No. No, you don’t get to keep playing the victim. Not now. I ruined you? No. I lost my scholarship. No college would even consider me. No one in town will hire me. You ruined my life, all because you had to go cry big bad wolf. It’s time for you to pay up.”

“I’m begging you. Please just leave. The court records are sealed, you can go somewhere else. No one would have to know.”

“Oh, but this is going to be so much fun, Y/N. I don’t think you’ll have a need for that jersey when we’re done though.”

“Zachary, don’t touch him. Please. Leave Carter out of this, he has nothing to do with you and me.”

“Haven’t you figured it out? He has everything to do with this. Him, and Konecny and his little lap dog Patrick. All of them,” He explained, “And that hot roommate of yours, who’s so very sweet. She loves to help people.”

Kora...anyone but Kora. 

“I wonder just how Ethan would feel if I was to get my hands on her? I’ve fucked his sister, might as well add his girlfriend to the list too.”

You surged forward, “If you lay a hand on her I swear to god-”

“See, now you’re willing to play. I knew one of them would convince you. So you’re going to go back to that group over there, and you’re going to tell them that you’re done for the night and you’re going to go home. And when he calls, because we both know he will, you tell him that you’re fine. And you keep telling him that.”

“Zach-”

“Shh, I’m not done yet. From now on, you don’t get to ignore me. Understand? I know where to find all of them. I’ve beaten Konecny before, I’ll gladly do it again.”

Fear rose up in you, because you knew he meant it. He never got along with Travis. Travis always saw right through him and he couldn’t stand that. He always took every chance he got to remind Travis how much he didn’t like him. You knew if he got the chance here, he’d do his very worst. 

You knew he wasn’t kidding about any of it. Not anymore. He meant every word, and if you didn’t do what he wanted he would make due on all of the threats. You didn’t have a choice anymore. You couldn’t go to the police, they wouldn’t believe you. You had no evidence of what he’d done before because the records were sealed due to the fact that you were a minor when it all took place. So they closed and sealed them to protect you. Never did you think that it would turn around and hurt you.

“Just don’t hurt them,” Your voice was small and broken, “Do whatever you want to me, but don’t hurt them. Please.”

“Oh, I plan on doing a lot with you, Doll,” He winked at you and held up his phone, “I’ll be seeing you soon.”

He smiled again and turned to walk away. He got a couple of yards away from you before turning back around, “And don’t think about breaking up with him to save him, it won’t work. It’ll only make things worse for everyone. Have a good night, Y/N.”

Your whole body shook as you slowly turned around. You really wouldn’t be getting away from it this time. He had you trapped. There would be no running, no cunning away to save everyone you loved from getting hurt. They’d all get hurt somehow. But you hoped you could shoulder most of it and save them from as much pain as you could. You were strong enough to handle it all again. You made it out alive once before, you could do it again.

Slowly, you made your way back to your seat and informed the group that you weren’t feeling well and were going to go home. You weren’t even sure your legs would be able to carry you out. You tried not to look back towards the ice. Not as tears finally started to fall. You were doing this to keep Carter and Travis safe. You were doing it to make sure Nolan never had to know what you really had to go through before he met you. 

And Kora...You would do a lot of things to make sure she was safe. She didn’t need to see any of it first hand. She didn’t need to experience how horrible all of it could be. You wanted to make sure that she would still be the same Kora by the end of all of this. If you had to, you’d cut her out after it was all over, just so she would never have to know. 

And Carter...you wished you could’ve frozen those moments of peace and love with him. You wished you could’ve stayed in bed that day, in your own little world with him. Or that you two could’ve met in a different life, one where you’d never loved Zachary. One where the two of you could just be normal. Where he wouldn’t feel the need to keep protecting you from everything. You wished your life would’ve been different, not for yourself, but for the people that you might end up dragging down with you. 

You never wanted to hurt any of them. You always knew you’d fall...but you never thought you’d end up bringing them along too. So, you’d play the game, you’d do whatever you had to do. Just to save them. You were already gone, there was nothing you could do about that anymore. But you still had a shot at keeping them out of it. And you were going to ensure it stayed that way.

[loquaciousquark]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E91 (Jan. 21, 2020)

Good evening, everyone! Sorry about missing last week; @eponymous-rose​ was out of town and I had some other commitments. Regardless, here we are! Brian is looking handsome and cold, as are Sam & Travis on the couch. Everyone is wearing coats. Is the heat broken?

That said, tonight’s guests are Travis Willingham & Sam Riegel.

Brian starts us off asking Sam if he’s remaking the Wire in Beverly Hills. Sam basically embodies that hello fellow kids meme tonight in a hand-knitted beanie from his wife, a bomber jacket, a yellow tee, and skinny jeans. They quickly photoshop in smoke trailing out of his mouth. We’re just a few minutes in and this is off the rails already.

Announcements: The next issue (#5) of Vox Machina comics comes out Wednesday, Feb. 19! It’s also available online at Dark Horse Digital and Comixology. And that’s it! Huh.

Episode 91: Stone to Clay

Brian tells us this is the first time ever to have Sam & Travis alone on Talks. I’m stunned and so are they. Sam says, “between me, Brian, Dani, and Travis right now, there’s four tens on this show right now.”

We’re already into questions less than ten minutes into the show. Truly this is a remarkable night.

63 in game days and 21 episodes passed between Caduceus’s first mention of Stone (episode 71) and Fjord connecting the dots. Travis blames the internet connection and his really bad ADHD night, as that was the night he and Laura remoted in from the hotel.

Brian tells us that when Ashley used to skype in, she could only see Matt & couldn’t see or really hear anyone else.

Travis says there was a huge delay for him between mouths moving and the audio coming through, and then that audio was pretty distorted. Laura could handle it okay, but Travis just heard a jumble and couldn’t parse it.

Sam took a CBD bath the other day and found it exactly as relaxing as a normal bath. Sam & Travis commiserate about taking baths only to have their knees pop out of the water. Tall people problems smh

Caleb & Nott completed the spell in less than a week, including dealing with the Angel of Irons & brokering peace treaties. Travis though the laughter was going to be Helas.

Travis says he definitely didn’t hear the name the first time (he remembered dust but not stone from the lava pits). “Look! Yes! No, I was not listening before! Thursday nights are my times to enjoy my friends and food! Marisha is an amazing note-taker; why would I ever take my own? This is how I got through college!”

Sam says he keeps a mission checklist in his head and has for ages. He has a page in his notebook labeled “To Do” that includes things like visiting Kiri or Shakaste, in case they have downtime and need ideas.

Travis asks if he continues writing in his (apparently) very small handwriting, and Sam says he has to leave room for Laura to draw all her dicks. They all marvel that she is actually a very good artist.

Travis honestly still thinks the Stone name is a huge coincidence, especially since Taliesin didn’t have access to Fjord’s last name when he created Caduceus’s last name and backstory. Sam challenges Travis that even if that were true, doesn’t he think Matt will find a way to tie it together?

Travis says Fjord doesn’t want anything to do with the last name and it’s not even his real name. He’s not convinced this isn’t a coincidence.

Travis did a lot of research into orphanage naming conventions when coming up with Stone. He does have a backstory as to how the orphanage manager picked Stone as his name.

Travis thinks Matt would have emphasized the Stone name more sooner if it had been a true connection and not coincidence.

Brian: “He does like to take credit for coincidences, doesn’t he?”

Nott didn’t think there was a catch in the ritual; Sam was more surprised they were allowed to achieve the milestone at all. He was shocked it happened so soon in the story and that the spell is relatively easy to cast.

He didn’t know it would fail, but there was a moment when he wasn’t sure if he wanted to go through with it. Travis agrees everyone was shocked when it didn’t work.

Fjord’s current stance on faith and destiny hasn’t changed since the last time he discussed it. Faith is a slow thing for Fjord and he really does think the name is a coincidence.

Sam as a player is excited to see what comes next for Nott; “if she had been transformed into Veth at that moment, I would have been excited to see what comes next. The fact that it’s still Nott makes me excited too. I’m excited to see more of Nott since she’s the best character in the M9.” He also confesses he was a bit relieved, in part because it’s delayed the inevitable. At some point she must decide if she is going to stay or go with the M9.

Cosplay of the Week: @kajicosplays​ on instagram of a lovely lady Percy. Brian: “Isn’t it fun when Taliesin’s characters live?”

Deep down, Nott knows she will do the transformation at some point, but at that last moment where she had to make a decision she had to check in with herself to make sure she was ready. Sam Riegel as a D&D player also knows that you have to trust your DM and make choices.

Brian misreads the word “ribbing.” Sam teaches Travis what rimming is. We all learn a lot about each other.

Sam thinks Fjord can realize when the time comes to set jokes aside. He thinks Fjord was very respectful. Travis has honestly forgotten that the conversation took place.

Travis has Dani answer from Fjord’s perspective. It’s actually pretty insightful, talking about how Fjord recognized someone hesitant to give up these newfound powers that have become intrinsically tied to self-worth.

Fjord has always been loyal, and Travis sees his protectiveness of the M9 as a logical extension of this.

Right now, he has found some agency & self-direction and is hopeful to share that sense with everyone else (he especially mentions Yasha).

Sam & Travis start quoting from Half-Baked. This is chaos.

Nott does want to stay with the M9, but she also wants to go home for sure, both of those things. The kiss with Caleb wasn’t necessarily a goodbye; it felt like the closing of a chapter. It felt like something to mark the end of the experience.

Now they’re quoting Beverly Hills Cop. Oh, boy.

“You look like you wrote Pitch Perfect.” When did this turn into a roast?

Fjord has no memories earlier than the orphanage (The Driftwood Asylum). There were a couple dozen kids there aside from him; Travis thinks some of them might have been named Stone. It also operated as a small child-labor workshop for carpentry & woodshop stuff. “It was a terrible place all around.” He has no images of parents or being dropped off.

Sam thought the Nott transformation would be more endgame, though he feels it makes sense that it’s not. “While Nott transforming into Veth was my original goal, what’s great about these long games is that your goals can change two or three times before the end. Now I can explore all these other things: does she want to go back and be a housewife? How does she rectify her obligations to her husband and child to the life that she’s made with the M9? It’s so exciting and interesting.”

Brian asks a hypothetical: if she could transform back but lose all Nott’s memories, would she do it? Sam: “Oh, that’s tough. I don’t know.”

Fanart of the Week: a lovely piece by @pen_draws with everyone in the hot tub.

Travis is very trepidatious about returning to the open ocean after rejecting Uk’otoa. He wants to make sure the third temple is sealed. It feels like it would be too easy for someone not to come and try to collect the job he left half-finished. He also wants to go back to Darktow.

Sam doesn’t know if Nott is still in love with Yeza, although she definitely still loves him. He’s playing with the idea of a high school sweetheart being exposed to the world and then going back home. But Yeza’s amazing, a great guy, perfect. “I guess we’ll find out when/if she turns back into Veth.” Sam feels guilty talking about him. “He’s a fictional character and I feel guilty that he might be watching the show.”

Neither Nott nor Fjord trust Essek. Travis: “He just went from being cold and aloof to being really warm. I know there’s been time and he’s lived an isolated life, but...time will show if he’s being genuine. All of our haunches were up. All of us were on level five alert.” He’s being so helpful that Travis doesn’t trust Mercer with him.

Fjord never ever considered becoming a paladin of the Traveler. “No. Fuck no!” The Wildmother reached out and directly intervened to save him. Travis gets super creepy bad vibes from the Traveler’s relationship with Jester (Sam agrees).

Nott feels more pressure when her own problems become the focus. It’s hard for her to open up and talk about her feelings. She’d rather pick up on other people’s problems. Sam also acknowledges it’s more pressure on him (and anyone) as a player when the whole table is looking at you.

And that’s that! Is it Thursday yet?

[curiousconch]

Exit

Chapter 6 of Ricochet (An Open Heart AU)

Catch up here: Series Masterlist

Chapter Synopsis: Heather is taken hostage, but by whom? And she isn't alone. Rafael and Bryce set tries to find the missing link.

Pairing: Rafael Aveiro x MC (Dr. Heather Song) | Bryce Lahela x MC (Dr. Heather Song)

Words: 1.4k+ | Genre: Crime, Suspense/Thriller, Romance

Rating/Warnings: Mature (16+) / violence, language

Author's Notes: Thank you so much for taking time to read this series. Please let me know if you want me to include/remove you in the tags list. Also, disclaimer: Majority of the characters are owned by Pixelberry, except the main character Heather Song and an OC Jordan Anderson.

Heather was due for another week in Johns Hopkins. So even though she didn't feel up to it after last night's fiasco, she forced herself to pack her clothes from the washer and clean out her temporary room.

She snuck glances to Bryce's bedroom door, trying to muster up the courage to face him and apologize. She was drunk last night. Drunk people make the lousiest mistakes, especially when that person is an emotional wreck. Long kept secrets of the heart creep up to the surface, often loaded with regrets like ticking time bombs inevitably blowing up the next morning.

In the end, she decided not to tell him her impassioned speech about nothing good ever happens after 2am, a reference from their shared favorite sitcom. Instead, she washed and cleaned and packed, and when the time came, left without a single word. She thought it was best to leave him be, giving them both space to process what they've just revealed. They'll just deal with it after she's done with her commitments in Maryland.

So she booked a car. And with one silent goodbye, she stepped out into the empty hallways. Her steps felt heavy against the carpeted floors, feeling more and more rueful with each. She was about to turn to the elevator bay when the fire exit flew open behind her.

Before she could turn around to see, an arm grabbed her by the waist while a piece of cloth covered her mouth and nose, muffling her shouts for help. Her head began spinning almost immediately. It wasn't long before she completely blacked out.

***

When Heather came to, she only saw darkness. Her immediate reaction was to scream, only to whimper after realizing she was gagged. Panic rose within her chest, as she struggled to think straight. She tried to blink to no avail. She was living in a nightmare, and she badly wanted to wake up. So she had two choices - either be a victim or be a survivor.

She chose the latter.

With that, she began to assess her surroundings, using her limited capabilities. She could tell that her eyes were covered, and by the tingling pain in her wrists behind her, she knew she was tied up. Strangely, her ankles were free. While most of her senses were restrained, those that weren't became magnified.

Her back felt the hard floor, she banged her head against it, confirming her theory.

Concrete? Uneven. Unfinished?

She tried to stand up, her legs felt weak, almost like jelly. She tried another time, and succeeded on kneeling. She balanced herself and used her legs to stand up, one after another.

She heard the sound of plastic rustling in the wind, and the cold night air brushing against her face.

Seems like I'm somewhere cold. Is that wind coming from large windows?

All of a sudden, she heard voices. The sounds were inaudible, but she observed intense shifts in the faint conversation.

Two voices, another room? Are they arguing?

She tried to direct herself towards the voices, taking caution not to make a noise. The volume gradually increased, aiding her to understand the conversation clearly enough.

"You're one hour late and you didn't bring enough."

"Such a whiney brat. Did you get that from juvy?"

"It's a mystery why someone haven't punched you and your perfect teeth."

"Some guy already did. But you? I bet ten grand you wouldn't. You're just a piece of shit without my funding."

"Right, without your pockets lined with cash, what are you?"

"Uh, free man with lots of connections?"

The words didn't make sense to her, but the voices that threw them around sounded familiar. She strained to get closer, trying to think who they could possibly be. Before she could hear more, she stumbled, her body making a noisy thud as it quickly planted on the ground. She felt something hard scrape against her cheek, a warm liquid trickled after, then pain.

Blood.

She shifted her head sideways, her legs dangling over something she couldn't quite figure out from the thick fabric of her jeans. Then it moved.

She gasped and retrieved her legs, her mind racing.

Who is it? Bryce? Rafael?

Her anxiety rose as she struggled with the mere possibility that she wasn't the only one kidnapped. The danger of the situation suddenly becoming more grave.

Then the body elicited a groan, a sound similar with her failed attempt to scream earlier. She heard it grumble once more, and then again. It was in the third time that Heather finally figured out who the voice might belong to.

Senator Ed Farrugia's.

Like a bucket of ice, a bone-chilling realization came to her. If they went all this way to hostage the senator, what's gonna stop them from killing her?

Her panicked thoughts were invaded by the sound of steps approaching. In an instant, she felt that she was shoved upright in a sitting position. The same person grabbed her by the collar and dragged her body back to where she came from, making her bare feet blister and bleed against the rough surface. Her face touched edges of plastic as her body followed the steps of her attacker. She tried to swallow her screams in an attempt to preserve energy, but the hairs at the back of her neck gave her fear away. She was then banged against a wall, followed by silence.

A set of steps receded, probably of the person who just dragged her back to her original place. This was quickly replaced by another set of steps, producing a distinct tapping. Different shoes, different person. First one seems like running shoes, this one sounds like leather.

Without warning, her hair was pulled backwards, making her wail beneath the cloth in her mouth. She smelled the scent of cigarettes.

"You just won't go down without a fight, eh? Well good for you, doctor. This will be all the more enjoyable."

Finally giving in on her fears, she shivered. She knew that voice anywhere. It was a sound so despicable that she hated it ever since the first time she heard it. The one man who mocked her, brought her down since her intern year. Arrogant, ambitious and immoral. All the curse words in the world couldn't describe this person. It belonged to a man she never wanted to see, hear, nor be in the presence of ever.

It was the greatest scumbag of all time.

Declan Nash.

***

Rafael was in full blown recon mode for Senator Farrugia's disappearance when he learned that Heather was also missing. Elijah called in to check if she has contacted him for the last 12 hours, he wished she did, but he told him no. When he got off the phone, the conference room he was in suddenly felt crowded.

"Dr. Song is apparently missing too," he reported to the rest of the team working on the Farrugia case. "Let's find where and when she was last seen, and start from there. I have a hunch she's going to lead us to the senator." He called IT to extract Heather's phone logs and location pings before he stepped out for a moment to process this new information. He found himself slumping in the fire exit stairwell, feeling an urge to punch the wall.

When he was about to act on it, his phone rang. It was ADA Lahela.

"Have you heard?"

"Yes, I just got off the phone with Elijah."

"And Senator Ed?"

"Yes, we're trying to find leads for the past 3 hours since we were notified."

"Okay, have you checked her phone records?"

"IT is working on it now."

"Okay. She supposedly left the condo around 4am this morning. I heard her leave. That might be a good starting point."

Rafael made a mental note.

"I'm going to meet Perry. He's in the front and center of this thing. I'll let you know as soon as I come up with anything." Raf heard Bryce say, after which the line ended.

He felt like an idiot, a sinking feeling of regret drawing him in. But he couldn't wallow in it now. Not until they find her.

There's time for that later. Right now, Heather needs me.

Fired up with resolve, he went out of the desolate stairwell and worked. He immediately followed up on Heather’s phone logs and available electronic records. He also called up field agents to go down at Bryce's complex for a copy of CCTV footage for the past 24 hours.

Once the instructions were handed over, he focused on Travis Perry. He helped himself to a cup of black coffee, willing his mind to stay sharp. He pored over Perry's file, searching for anything they may have missed.

He sighed, pushing back his emotions to the back of his mind. It's quickly becoming one of the longest nights of his life.

Author’s Notes 2: When I wrote this, I thought of merging this with the next. I just felt that they're best read together. So instead of combining the two, I've decided to publish both chapters simultaneously. Both is packed, I know, even I got dizzy writing it. But I hope you'll enjoy the roller coaster ride as much as I did. Appreciate it if you could share your thoughts!

Taglist: @ramsey-lahela @eleanorbloom @choicesficwriterscreations

[cameoamalthea]

That time Artagan Straight Up Choked a Guy

I have heard it thrown out, as evidence that Artagan is not a nice person, that he wanted to strangle someone to death. Context is important, as in the fact it occurred during a safe and consensual transaction as part of a deal where terms were agreed upon.

Here’s a breakdown of what happened:

They call on Artagan by drawing a penis and writing the message (laughter)

SAM and TALIESIN: "Cum see us--"

MATT and ASHLEY: "--4 a good time."

TALIESIN: "Time" circled.

MATT: "This is Vox Machina, by the way."

Then they tell him they actually want something from him, to allow them to go back to the material plane from the fey wild without losing time (as part of the Feywild is you might come back years or decades after you left).

LAURA: It's been a little crazy, actually. We were hoping that maybe we could seek your aid? Please?

MATT: "Define the request, please."

LAURA: Okay, so you know how time is weird when we go back to the other plane of existence?

MATT: "Weird? Time is *fun* when you go back."

LAURA: Exactly. It's so much fun. We're in dire straits over there. The world is about to be taken over by an asshole that wants to be a god, and we're trying to kill him, and we're here now, and we're hoping that we can hang out here and rest and go back and only a few seconds have passed? Maybe a minute or two?

SAM: Is that something you can control?

MATT: (chuckles) "Are you telling me that you would stumble into this space unannounced, summon me here under the pretense of a good time, and then request me to bend the very essence of time passage between my plane and yours?"

MARISHA: We can show you a good time first.

LAURA: We definitely do want to show you a good time about it.

LIAM: And what is your idea of a good time? Unbutton, unbutton.

TRAVIS: And we certainly don't expect that to be accomplished without something given in return. Of course.

During the course of this conversation, he asks how they’ve been, and Vax tells him:

LIAM: I'm unkillable for a while.

MATT: "*That's* fun."

So in exchange for this huge favor, he asks for two things:

MATT: "Tell you what. I'll help you under two conditions. One: should you go back and defeat this wannabe god thing you speak of and all is well and you're heroes and you have all of this influence and money and everything's grand, we can discuss maybe creating a doorway for me that allows passage. I'll come visit and see what strangeness your world seems to have whenever I'd like."

MARISHA: I don't know if you'd like it.

MATT: "Oh, I'm sure I can figure out a way."

LIAM: It's real dicey at the moment.

MATT: "But I'm sure if you succeed, that won't be a problem, and if you fail, well, then I guess the deal's off, anyway."

TRAVIS: Very true.

LAURA: Good point.

MATT: "Second: I wish to strangle you until death."

Archfey have a weird sense of fun. What is unpredictable and unexpected is fun. The weird time displacement, that’s fun. A mortal suddenly unkillable, that’s fun. He wants to test that, and they did offer a good time. A new experience is a good time.

LIAM:  I'm sorry. Come again?

MATT: "I wish to put my hands on your throat until you expire. If you say you're unkillable, well, that's a new experience entirely."

LIAM: Okay.

Vax consents to the deal, then makes additional specifications.

LIAM: I have one further request on our end. Can you send us backward in time?

MATT: "I'm afraid it doesn't work that way, but I could give the mere passage of an hour."

SAM: Mere passage of an hour? That's good, yeah.

MATT: "Day for an hour. I think it's a fair trade, yes?"

MARISHA: Can you give us a full day in order to make sure that he does come back?

MATT: "Sure. Day for an hour. 24 hours are yours to do as you like."

MARISHA: You would come back in 24 hours, right?

SAM: Can I ask one question first? Will you be pleasuring yourself during this?

MATT: He actually laughs at this and goes, "I think the process will be enjoyable enough."

SAM: Oh. I respect you so much.

TALIESIN: Since we're making a deal, I want to make sure of a few things, because I love making deals. First of all, as perhaps a token of friendship, do you have any idea what this is? I am still apologetically naked and wet.

MATT: "It's a pulse stone."

ALL: A what?

MATT: "A pulse stone."

LAURA and SAM: What is that?

MATT: "It's meant to distract undead.

SAM: How do you activate it?

MATT: "It just does."

So overall Artagan is helpful, giving information just as a token of friendship, and being very honest about what he wants. Just to experience what it’s like to kill someone, consequence-free. This is a consensual transaction.

LIAM: I walk up to Artagan. All right, fucknut, let's do this.

MATT: "You believe this? You really believe you're going to come back if you die?"

LIAM: (clicks tongue)

MATT: "Fair play. To the immortals." And he takes your throat and begins to squeeze, his eyes locked in, and he keeps watching you.

TRAVIS: I step up behind Vax in case he has an involuntary reaction to reach up to his arms. Just to keep his arms down.

MATT: He locks in.

LIAM: No fear, remember.

MATT: Yeah. Without making any other noise, continues to apply pressure. Eventually, your vision begins to go dark.

The party agrees that this is weird, but it’s not malicious and it does not do any lasting harm. Vax cannot die and he can’t even fear death. There’s pressure and then his vision goes dark. Matt summarizes:

MATT: It was a fascination with something different and new and you said "cannot die," and that immediately piqued his interest. Even the nicest of fey are weird and have their dark sides.

[ty-talks-comics]

Best of Marvel: Week of May 8th, 2019

Best of this Week: Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #6 (Legacy #30) - Tom Taylor, Juann Cabal, Nolan Woodard, Federico Blee and Travis Lanham

I wasn’t expecting to be punched in the gut today.

The book begins with Spider-Man at the whim of Doctor Octopus, trapped under a cable from the Manhattan Bridge with the villain holding a boxed macguffin above his head. Suddenly, a new hero emerges: Spider-Bite a nine and half year old who handedly defeats Doc Ock until Vulture flies him away. With the young Spiders help, Peter is able to get the cable lifted from his back and the two chase down the fiends!

Upon making it onto the train that the two escaped to, it is revealed to be a trap set by The Green Goblin who reveals his new team of villains; The Sinister Sixty! In a beautiful, but very chaotic, double page spread of a STAGGERING SIXTY panels, the two defeat the villains before the real mastermind is revealed, a very upgraded Stilt-Man. Together, Spider-Man and Spider-Bite defeat Stilt-Man and retrieve the box, containing a Spider-Man action figure with many points of articulation and it is a very, very fun adventure! Until Spider-Bite starts coughing.

AND HERE’S THE GUT PUNCH.

I won’t spoil what happens for the rest of the issue, but the title of the book really lives up to ts idea. It’s not too often that we get these kinds of issue where a hero will do something small for the citizens of their universe. There’s always a huge threat or big bad villain to combat, but hardly time to be grounded, to connect with the reason that they fight crime in the first place. Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man has been surprisingly amazing thus far when it comes to storytelling and art. While I have complained the Cabal’s art made NYC feel empty in the past, this book felt so full of life, even when there was so much happening on screen that it became a little hard to focus, he pulled it back. The action was amazing, dynamic and had a great flow to it, making sure that neither Spider-Man nor Spider-Bite completely outshined each other, but still giving most of the spotlight to the kid.

I want to see more issues like this from more series. Even if they’re only just fillers because this one was all kinds of exciting and heartbreaking and insanely inspiring at the same time. I highly recommend everyone to read this. Even if you haven’t read the other issues, this one stands up on its own as a very heartfelt story.

---------------------------------------------------

There’s no hope for redemption in Namor now.

Runner Up: Invaders #5 - Chip Zdarsky, Carlos Magno, Butch Guice and Travis Lanham

Namor has always skirted the line between anti-hero and villain during his many years of publication. He fought against the Nazis in World War II, but he’s also had stalemates with world Governments for their treatments of the sea. He’s stood up for mutant rights, but he’s also become part of the Phoenix Force and fought the Avengers. He’s helped saved the universe more times than he can count, but he’s also helped destroy many more.

The last few years haven’t exactly been kind to him either. Between being murdered and brought back to life by the Squadron Supreme, losing control of Atlantis to Hydra Cap and having Celestials crash down into his home, Namor has had enough. Enlisting the help of the US Navy Commander grandson of one of his WWII war buddies, Namor plans to launch bombs that supposedly only targets humans.

Steve finds out about the initial plans and tries his best to cut off the Commander before he can help initiate the launch. He calls the Admiral in charge of the ship that the missiles are held on and when she tries to intervene, she and her crew are viciously murdered by the Commander and other Atlanteans.

At the same time, original Human Torch, Jim Hammond, tries to find Namor to put a stop to his plans, but is ambushed by the madman. Namor savagely beats him and notes that Jim could have helped Atlantis rebuild after its destruction during Secret Empire. Hammond tries to appeal to Namor's emotions and uses their friendship, but whatever Charles Xavier did to him during his amnesia period has driven him mad with grief and rage. Namor, egged on by the ghost of his best human friend, Tommy, says that he does what he does for his people and decapitates Hammond.

Captain America arrives shortly after calling the Avengers to help stop the launched missiles. He tells Namor that his plan has failed, that the Avengers will stop The Commanders missiles and they do. But Namor, being the cunning King/Prince he is, notes that while that may be true, they didn't stop the missiles that Atlantis launched in “retaliation” to America's aggression.

In my opinion, Namor has truly never been better than he is right now. His rage and deepening insanity are making him a more compelling character than his times as a petulant king or reluctant supervillain. I love the callbacks to his early Invaders years and the time gap between his disappearance and him being found post amnesia. This is the unhinged man that we all knew that he could be and I am here for it.

There's also a sort of Shakespearean quality to the story being told. The Prince is going mad because of the ghosts that he's seeing, with greater power than he has ever wielded. He betrays his friends and everyone else close to him because he only feels that they are out to destroy him, so he, in mad arrogance, goes after them. It's tragic to see a hero fall like this, which only makes this even more perfect.

Not only is the story awesome, but Guice and Magno's art still compliment and enhance each other. Magno draws everything with a beautiful near realism and colors very brightly, contrasting the very dark tone of the story. I particularly love the way that he depicts The Human Torch and how he looks enveloped in fire. Guice, of course, still dips in the grit and grim of the 1940s and shows a bit of a lighter side to Namor, back in the good old days.

Invaders continues to captivate me and seeing the new lengths that Namor is willing to go to protect us people is terrifying. I'm gleefully anticipating the next issue, high recommend!

[go-diane-winchester]

The Travis Aaron Wade debacle and why you should care.

I only write about my boys, Jensen and Jared, and any harm that I feel is coming their way.  That harm comes from Misha's mobilizing and his poisonous fanbase.  So why am I talking about this?  It's got nothing to do with Jensen and Jared?  Well, actually, it does.  And I am starting to feel, maybe Wade is innocent.  I am not saying he is, because the case is still pending.  But, thus far, he has only been accused.  He hasn't been proven guilty.  I am an abuse survivor, having dealt with this horror three different times in my life, twice as a child and once as an adult.  If Travis did do any of this, I would back up his accusers, I don't care how much of a friend he was, to Jensen and Jared.  Abuse of any kind is intolerable and in Travis's case, some minors were involved.  That is unforgivable. 

Travis Aaron Wade, in case you didn't know, was accused of sexually harassing and stalking fans at cons and then via social media around 2015.  When I first heard this, I believed it because the allegations came at a time when I was fast asleep with regard to this fandom.  Even then, I frowned when a recognizable name popped up in this debacle:  Emily Rose.  So I guess I wasn't as fast asleep as I thought.  Emily is the fan who got into a fight with William Shatner over destiel.  He even accused her Anti-Bullying Twitter page of being biased.  I don't just believe anything this person's name is attached to, because she is a very devious creature.  So recently, I decided to dig deeper and came across a report on this case.  Upon reading it, I realized something.  Almost every single person who has accused Travis is either a minion or heller or both.  People mentioned in the case are also minions or hellers or both.  That is too much of a coincidence.  This is the list of the accusers and the affiliated parties in this case:

Ashley McClintic  [first accuser]

Theresa Cotter/Lua James  [fled California after Travis's home was vandalized]

Monica Gleberman [lied that she has sex with Jensen and Jared]

Lexi (Alexis) Cooper (@lexicooperxo / @hugsforthemish)

Stacy LePore

Emily Cleghorn [Emily Rose - refused to help Travis when his account was hacked]

Michele Villery  [Monica's friend - defamed Travis online]

Jackie Bojarski [Monica's friend - defamed Travis online]

Kristin Justice [claimed Travis kissed her in crowded room]

Reba Snodgrass (@RebaWinchester / @Mishanews)

Jessica Halliday 

Jenna DeViller

Kim Swartz

Falon Yates

Janelle Clay Davis [stalked Travis online mobilizing fans against him]

Rike Marie, or Melanie Adeline (@mishasdiary [sent nudes to Travis]

Dominique Teagle

Sgt Stephanie Fiebke [mocked Travis's military career]

Sara Burnhope

Katie Maie Aucter

Elizabeth Wera [told the truth and then retracted statement]

Michelene [only name provided in this report]

Jenna [no other name provided]

What are the odds?  The only people Wade went after were Misha's fans, and the only people who tried to help them were Misha's fans.  Nope!  Something is very off about this whole scenario.  This case is a legal one now, so there are certain receipts that are unavailable.  However, most of the information, corroborated with many receipts, is on this site:  http://www.spntrollsvstravisaaronwade.com/.  Be warned the some information is withheld due to the ongoing investigation and the reporter does become subjective.  There is also some hearsay in the report, something I am not crazy about.  Hearsay has no place in an investigative reports.  But the report is thorough, and has various receipts.  I am not telling you to believe everything.  I am just telling you to keep an open mind. 

After reading these reports, about the accusers and their accounts of the events, I have to say the whole situation seems fishy.  The accusers made really far-fetched claims and there is proof that some of them not only lied, but some of the sympathizers were stalking Travis for years now, hacking into his account and stabbing a knife into his front door with a note threatening to kill him, his family including the family dogs.  Two of the victims confessed to lying about the accusations.  The first is Lexi Cooper. 

The second is Reba Snodgrass [Mishanews] who was doing a con called Wayward Con, which is why she apologized to Travis.  She wanted him to do the con.  She did a video confession, but after being reprimanded by hellers on social media, she recanted the apology.  Many of the accusers set up gofundme and similar accounts asking for money for legal fees, but never approached lawyers.  The more I looked into this, the more sorry I feel for Travis.  I am not saying I know what happened, but so far, they look more guilty than he does.  Why was there such a full blown ambush against him?  If he is innocent, then there were some possible reasons. 

Travis was threatening the spinoff

Travis, and I didn't know this, is quite a popular actor, even amongst SPN fans.  Fans were choosing him over Kim and Briana.  If CW got wind of this, they might have cancelled the Wayward idea and pushed for something with Cole, Travis's character.  The hellers didn't want this because their logic was that if they could make Wayward happen, they could make destiel happen.  So they couldn't afford for Wayward to fail.  That is why Travis had to go.

Travis threatened Cockles

Apparently Travis has said something sweet about Jensen and Jared's friendship.  Clif [who is an idiot] made a big deal out of the whole issue because of the possible tinhat angle of what Travis was saying.  As a PR person, I would like to tell Clif: stop acting like a suspicious idiot.  No one is drawing more attention to the tinhat thing than you are.  Try being subtle, stupid fool.  You are causing more ripples, instead of letting it just slide.  Well, Clif was not the only one that was affected by Travis's lighthearted comments.  The hellers were adversely affected too.  There are tinhats amongst them, who believe that destiel is cockle's fault.  This man's admiration for a friendship rubbed them the wrong way.  He needed to be punished.

Threat to Misha's ''popularity''

Misha has been on the show for ten years.  No one is demanding for a spinoff for him.  Not even his own hellers perhaps because they know Jensen wont join Misha, and Castiel is not entertaining by himself.  This new guy pops up and suddenly he is very popular.  An account called Tara Larson appeared on Twitter, on the 22th of December 2017, accusing Misha of sexual harassment during his photo ops.  Any idiot can see that although none of the pictures are tasteful, they are requested and paid for by fans.  So that is not sexual harassment.  Fans gave their consent and none of them look like minors.  Neutral fans are many things, but they are not stupid.  The over-reacher's in our fandom are hellers.  The hellers allege that Travis's assistant Vicki did it to tarnish Misha's name.  Why would she do that?  What does Misha have to do with this debacle.  The evidence they use, is this one.  Vicki is grey.

However, if you read the whole exchange, you see this:

So Vicki knows what a bibro is?  She used to be a fan long before the word bibro was born, so she knows the fandom lingo that is not even part of all the fan's lexicon?  I know of hellers who don't know what a heller is.  Read the whole exchange here:

http://www.spntrollsvstravisaaronwade.com/events-by-year/2017-2/

Nope, the whole thing sounds suspicious.  Especially since, at the time when the account was started and active [it has probably been reported and removed now] Vicki and her daughter were, allegedly, both in surgery.  Possible scenario is that one of the hellers set up the Tara Larson account to make Travis look like a bully and to make Misha look like a victim.  Because why would Vicki do something like that and then confess to it like an idiot.  And on social media no less, even though monitoring social media is part of her job.  Either that, or they doctored the screenshot.  I think the hellers feel Travis was competition for Misha.  According to one heller, who knows Misha personally, this is what she said to Travis about Misha.

Now, a few of them are starting to feel the same way about Alex Calvert perhaps because he is a younger, handsomer, shinier new replacement for Misha.

Why I care and why you should

So far, I have received messages from hellers about Jared's ''bad working conduct''.  I have posted on people saying that he abuses his power and Misha on set.  One heller told me, Jared intentionally cracked her rib by hugging her too hard during a photo op.  I made a post about that.  Travis's reality today might be Jared's reality tomorrow.  They have accused him of racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia etc.  Whose to say they don't take this route tomorrow?  I mean, it hypothetically worked on Travis.  It might work on Jared.  Especially since, they hate Jared more that Travis.  And Jared is a friendly ''run across the road to meet the fans'' type of person.  One big accusation and boom! it's over.  Ironically, everyone distanced themselves from Travis when the scandal hit except Jared.  Eventually even he had to distance himself, perhaps by the behest of his manager.  It was far too sticky a situation.  Travis has dealt with the stalking, harassment and vandalism for three years and counting.  I think that is too much for anyone to deal with. 

Who knows what the legal outcome will be.  I don't know Travis well enough to make any claims about him.  Although from what I read, he does seem like a very stupid man with a big mouth.  A gullible sucker, if you catch my drift.  However, if someone out there does know the truth, please speak up.  Remember, if you know something about Travis that is incriminatory, and you remain quiet, you are part of the problem.  If you know of his innocence, help him, the way you hope someone will help Jared one day.    Either speak to Travis's lawyers or send a confidential email message to this reporter at:  info@spntrollsvstravisaaronwade.com.  Informant names will be kept confidential.

[sunshinechii-scenarios]

Kiss the Pain away

✿ Nct’s Renjun x Female!Reader ✿ Angst, fluff, not rlly smut but theres making out lol ✿ 2.3k words ✿ Not requested ✿ Written by Chii ✿ Masterlist!

A/N: hey kids its me,,,,renjun trash,,,whats newwwwww. I’ve had this wip for a while and got super inspired to finish it after listening to stay the night by kid travis! his other song sunset is what i wrote sunset ride too! also the blogs first year anniversary is the 10th I’M CRYING uwu - chii

✿ Description: When the world decides to unleash its wrath on you, you can find your peace of mind with someone.

         You throw your school bag on the ground, letting it fall wherever it landed and slammed yourself onto your desk chair. Your phone landed on your bed when you haphazardly threw it, annoyed. Huffing, you turned on your laptop to blast music directly into your ears in attempts to drown everything out. Unfortunately, a post-it you stuck on it earlier this week was staring back at you.

“Read your chapters for next week,” you said out loud after you ripped it off the screen. You forgot you had school work. Your teacher assigned four chapters to be read by next week before the class meets and you were only given the weekend to complete it all. It wouldn’t have been an issue if this week was the worst week of your life so far.

         You had gotten into the worst argument with your best friend. Lucas Wong was known around school, not for anything good though. He was a heartbreaker and you hated how much he played your best friend like a fiddle. He had been texting her, getting her hopes up and leading her on since the beginning of the semester. You thought back to when she called you at two in the morning, when she was well aware you both had class tomorrow at eight am, to ask you how she should respond to the text that he replied to. The one she sent six hours before that. You were looking out for her as friends should but she didn't see it that way. She let a boy blur her perspective of you. Her pink glasses of love turned into an angry red and accused you of wanting him as well, even going as far as to questioning your relationship with Renjun. Your brows furrowed at the last text either of you sent, is Renjun your rebound because I like Lucas? You left her with no response to her cold words and haven't talked to her since.

         The final you took on Tuesday came back with an ugly 47 inside a red circle. You canceled the date Renjun set up for you two in efforts to lift the finals week stress off of both of your shoulders. You studied late into the night every night. Right after classes, you rushed to the tutoring hall and the countless hours you spent studying went to waste. All that time with the tutor, the after class sessions with a student-teacher was for nothing. You were going to fail the class unless you took up the 25 page assignment summarizing the class which would be due a day before the semester was over, which was in two weeks.

         Your mind scanned all the problems you had, everything felt like rocks on your shoulders. Bringing you down, mentally and physically. The only things that helped you when you felt stressed were Renjun, your best friend and the playlist Renjun specially made for you for when you got stressed. Renjun was on his way home from his late classes, he had later classes and his commute was a lot longer than yours also. Your only option was music, so, you went into your files and played it. Your face lifted from its sour expression to a soft one when you read the title for the millionth time since he sent the playlist to you, for when the stars fall, i’m here. It was all lowercase and the playlist cover was of the two of you. You plugged in the cord and pressed play while you hauled the giant textbook from the corner of your desk and started reading. It was going to be another night coped up in your room.

         After an hour or so, you pushed out from under the desk and stretched your legs that lost blood flow about 10 minutes ago, they felt like pins and needles. You paused your music and you could hear arguing. Your phone was still sitting on your bed. You could see it lighting up every now and then in your peripheral vision but right in front of you was the big, heavy textbook. Your eyes grew tired from the highlighted lines and colorful pen marks that etched the paper. You hear the bed creak in the other room and footsteps downstairs. Dad was sleeping on the couch again. You sigh and shut the book on the desk. You had no motivation to keep reading the chapters. The moon outside told you that maybe it was time to sleep, so you tried to.

         As usual, the same things pop up in your head. False accusations from someone you could trust, separation of family and failure. Another night you considered crying in the pillow until you tired yourself out but tonight wasn't going to be that night. You knew Renjun finished his last final at 7 PM today and he would usually be home by 9 PM due to transportation time. You turned to your side and picked up your phone. An unknowing smile appeared on your lips when you saw Renjun as your lock screen, he was happily smiling as he sat on a picnic blanket. Your fingers move across the screen to unlock your phone and tap the messaging app. Your eyes scanned your most recent texts. Seven hours ago, a text from your college saying that final scores are out. A day ago, your mom asking you if there was milk in the fridge. Five days ago, a text from your ‘friend.’ Your mood soured and you sighed. Thankfully, Renjun's number was conveniently pinned on top of your most recents. Your fingers played across your screen to text him.

Y/N: are you awake right now? Renjun: I just got home, are you okay? Y/N: can i come over? Renjun: Of course, my parents are out on their monthly date night! Y/N: be there in 10 Renjun: I'll meet you at the door...is something wrong? Y/N: I’ll talk about it later Renjun: Alright love :(

You figure it was be best to tell him in person. You rolled off your messy bed to plant your two feet on the floor. You walk over to your closet to put something on to wear. The first thing you grabbed was one of his hoodies he gave you when you two first started going out and a random pair of black pants. You stuffed your keys, wallet and phone into your hoodie before opening your room slightly. Your mom was asleep but your dad called out your name when he heard the door hinges creak.

“Y/N?” You go down the stairs softly and walk down to the couch.

“Where are you going sweetpea? It's kind of late.” His voice was low, as if he just woke up, he probably did. He was always a light sleeper.

“I was going to visit Renjun. He just came back from his last final.” You couldn't lie to your dad and he trusted you enough to tell him the truth always.

“Ah, tell him I said hello,” your father paused before continuing, “keep him around sweetie. He really cares for you.”

You nod and you bid your dad a good night but he's already fast asleep. You sighed and fixed the blanket he had over himself before going to slide on a pair of shoes.You walk out of the door and lock it behind you. You stepped foot out the house and into the night. The sky was dark but littered with stars, mocking you almost. As dark as the sky got, there was always something shining either it be the moon or the stars. You had nothing right now.

         The walk wasn’t too long, only 15 minutes. You walked closer and closer to the white house on the corner of his street. Your feet stopped at his blue mailbox with gold stickers reading out 127 on them. At your feet you see a silhouette in the orange light, your eyes follow it and there was Renjun was sitting on the steps in front of the door. The orange patio light shining from above him. You followed his shoes up his jean clad legs, all the way up to his face buried in his phone. You walk up to him and he looked up at you. He stood up and brought you into a warm hug that you wished could last forever. He mumbled a small, “I missed you so much.” You give him a lazy smile and kiss his cheek.

“Do you want to stay out here or go inside?” He asked while you were still hugging his chest.

Mumbling an “inside,” he let go of you and opened the front door. You two tossed off your shoes before going to his room, hand in hand. The sound of footsteps in sync up the wooden stairs was the only sound that could be heard before he opened his room door.

         "When did you rearrange your room?" You said as you stepped into his room. The white walls were lined with his sketches and drawings. A picture of you two was proudly placed on his desk right by his laptop that was playing music at a low volume.

"Just this week, I wanted to face the window at night. Helps me sleep I’ve realized,” he said as you walked around his bed and picked up the couple plushie you bought for you two. You held it in your arms as you sat on his bed. The springs creaking as his dark blue sheets wrinkled under your weight. You giggled before speaking, “to watch out for UFOs?"

"You know me so well but no, the moon and sun reminds me of us." You turned your head to smile at Renjun. He mirrored a similar expression before walking over to the side of the bed you were on.

He crouched down and looked at you, “tell me what's wrong.”

         You explained to him the events of the past week. His heart sank. He wasn't able to be there for you. He was dealing with academic related issues too but he was beating himself over not checking up on you every now and then. He felt guilty but he was there for you now, so, Renjun slowly moved you into his chest. Letting you rest on him. You took this chance to bury your face into his sweater and hug his frame. You felt the tears starting to form. As you kept talking, Renjun would stroke your head and back, trying to provide a sense of comfort and safety for you.

         When you finished spilling your worries out to him, you looked up at him with teary eyes. His thumbs found their way to your cheeks and wiped away the evidence of your sadness. Your eyes fluttered in between his eyes and his lips as he came close to place a soft kiss on your forehead.

“I’m sorry nothing worked out the way you wanted to it,” he mumbled. When he pulled back, you pulled him back in, on the lips. You didn’t know what took over you. All you knew was that you needed something to help you temporarily forget your troubles. He was taken aback at first but gave into you. He closed his eyes and let you do what you needed to do. He blindly pulled the sleeves of his sweater down to his hands. You felt the soft fabric against your cheeks as he wiped the hot tears streaming down your face again. As if Renjun’s entire being was pushing out all the negativity you had inside you, the worries you had washed away each second you two spent against each other.

         You let your arms circle around his neck, your hand weaving themselves in his hair and eventually playing with it while you kissed him. The kiss was soft at first but turned intense.Your nails slightly scratched at his scalp, he felt shivers up his spine. Your noses bumped each others while you deepened the kiss as far as you could with the sudden need of his lips unlike you ever felt before. When you pulled a little too hard on his hair, he groaned and it knocked you out of your trance. You quickly moved away from him. His eyes fluttered open, his lips a deeper hue of pink and his hair, messy. He blinked a few times before looking at you. Your hair was also a mess and your lips looked swollen.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry I didn't mean to hurt you are you okay?" You worryingly asked, the last thing you wanted to do was hurt him accidentally.

His arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to him, "I'm fine." Your legs dug into his bed at either side of his body. You straightened yourself up as he held your back. You saw his dark eyes glitter in the moonlight as he look up at you. You felt him shift to sit up straight and hold onto your waist now. He let your fingers lace together at your sides before he placed a kiss on your knuckles. He looked up at you through his lashes before trailing his hand up your arm. You sat down in between his legs and he gently moved your hair from your shoulders. His lips brushed against your collarbone before giving it a featherlight kiss.

“Is this alright?” His breath was hot against your skin. You nodded. He felt your hands back in his hair, you unknowingly gripped on it harder and harder but he didn’t mind. It was like encouragement. His lips fell into one area above your collarbone before latching on and leaving harsh kisses, each one feeling like a burn, something you could get addicted to. Your hands went under his sweater to lift it off and to leave him in a plain white t shirt.

         You were wrong about having nothing. The darkest skies in the night had something to hang onto for support. Something to make them feel like a whole. You had Renjun.

i love huang renjun that is all uwu - Chii

Please don’t claim this as your own and please don’t do anything with it without my permission. If you don’t want it happening to you, don’t do it to others.

[shleezaemour]

Snippet to my latest smut update

“No! I’m not doing it Hazel! You can’t make me!” I was trying to escape my annoying little sister, but she was on my heels coming in hot.

“Please!! Nico please!! Just do the Rush stuff with him! It’s the first time Alpha Omega has had an open bidding. The first time they didn’t pick the bids! Anyone can rush! Frank has wanted to rush Alpha Omega since we arrived and he always gets cast aside as not good enough. This year over twenty of the members graduate so they have a lot of open spots! Please!! It’s not like you are going to want to actually join, I just need you to help him!” It was true, Franks been talking about joining the Alphas for a long time. I also know that Last year they tried to recruit me. They know I can slip in and out of places easily. I helped one of their members sneak into a liquor store and steal a few kegs once. Ever since they have been trying to get me to join.

“I’m a lone wolf Hazel, I don’t need a pack.”

“But Frank does! Please I’ll do anything!”

“Like let me use your car anytime I want? For a year?” I could see her breaking at that statement. She didn’t want to give up the new car dad had bought her.

“Get him in and I’ll sign it over to you.”

Fuck! I guess I’m pledging to Alpha Omega.

(Timebreak)

I hate my sister.

Frank and I were assigned to one of the chapter houses, it was a big frat so there were four of them. They put 5 pledges to each. I hate my sister because I’m standing next to her boyfriend in a fucking chicken costume. There is apparently some strange celebration tonight and we are stuck making the food for it. It had been this way all week, some dumb or embarrassing thing we are assigned to for the week. They apparently don’t count this as hazing. The school has a no hazing policy. What the school doesn’t know is that we are sworn to secrecy and if we break it they will come after us, apparently that happened once and the guy ended up transferring because of the hell they rained down on him.

I didn’t need a bunch of preppy Neanderthals looking into my personal life or my family, so whatever they had in mind for hazing I could take. Part of me was hoping it was like those hazing videos on pornhub... not so much luck. All week it had been cleaning the house in awful costumes. We had to hand out flyers for the mixer tonight dressed as chickens and then we will be serving the food the same way. Brother Jason was in charge of us for the week, but we really just reported to him. We still had to do the bidding of all the residents in this house. There was Brother Percy, Brother Jason, Brother Will (who seems like the nicest), Brother Leo, and Brother Pollux. All of which were dicks in their own right, but getting to know them more this week was a bit more eye opening.

Besides frank and me we had these two brothers, Conner and Travis. They seemed to love rush week. They were just as pumped to get in as Frank. There was another kid too, Austin. From what we deduced he’s related to Will in some way, so Will isn’t allowed to interact with him.

I found out that Percy had an abusive step father and works 3 jobs to put himself through school and support his mother, Jason was a foster kid that made his own way into college alone after being separated from his sister. Leo’s mom died leaving him in the foster system too, him and Jason were foster brothers and clicked up to make way to university. Pollux lost his twin brother in a school shooting and plans to lobby for gun control in the future. As much as these guys are douchbags, it seems the world made them that way. Their story wasn’t to far off from mine. Seems like we were put in the tragedy house. Maybe that’s why they wanted us, we all seemed to have a sad story. These guys were as good as they were bad, my kind of people. If I had a kind of people that is.

“If I have to peel one more egg for tonight I’m going to scream!” Frank wasn’t much of a cook, he was stuck peeling while I stirred up the deviled eggs.

“It’s only two more days dude. Percy let it slip that tonight after the party we will be given assignments. If we can complete the challenges we are in no questions asked.”

“Yeah I overheard Jason talking about it too. They are putting us in teams of two.”

“Well looks like I draw the short straw on that one.”

“Dude you know I’m making you my partner in this, I wouldn’t have survived without you.” He finished peeling the egg and began cutting them in halves.

“You want this Frank, I could care less if they take me. Partner yourself with someone who wants to join. I would go with Austin, you know the brothers will pick eachother. That dude is smart and sneaky, he will help you get the challenge done by any means necessary.” I started putting ingredients in the yellow mash under a large mixer.

(Timebreak)

After the party we were assembled into the foyer still in our chicken attire. Lined up and awaiting the next level of hell.

“Pledges! You have done well this week. All of you have survived! Other houses have lost pledged this week, only our have endured. We have four bedrooms open! Not to say that all of you won’t make it, you all very well could and two would just need to share. So don’t think that this final challenge if you complete it is as make or break. It will only be you not completing the challenge that disqualifies you from Alpha Omega.” Jason was talking formally in his brothers robes. They all were decked out in their Greek gear behind him.

“You will have two days to complete the challenge. In two days you will come back here and present your winnings. In teams of two you will go forth and receive no help except from your partner. One of you will stay behind and do the house challenge if they do choose to except it. Pick your partner!”

Frank did as I instructed and chose Austin, the still brothers of course chose eachother which left me to do the house challenge.

“Good, now Stoll Brothers. We challenge you to make 1000$ legally. Meet us back here on Monday at 11pm, well I guess that gives you three days but you will need the time. Austin and Frank, the same goes to you. 1000$, we don’t care how you do it as long as it’s legal. Sell lemonade, T-shirt’s, your labor. No asking for money from family, no borrowing from friends and none out of your own bank account. We will have spies out there to make sure this is done. If you do not have the thousand dollars bring us what you made and we shall deliberate of whether you are worthy to join the brotherhood. Keep in mind that if you have the full amount or more that it shows us that you will do well in our philanthropy department and we need people who can raise money for the chapter. It’s shows you are resourceful and determined. We already know you are loyal and disciplined, show us you can go farther than just obedience. Show us you can be a leader. 11pm Monday gentleman, that will be all.” Frank shook my hand and wished me luck. I followed the brothers into the letting room to await whatever the house challenge would be.

“Pledge Di Angelo please stand before us.” They all sat on a long couch facing me.

“You are the best one out of the bunch, you already show resourcefulness, but you seem to have a small problem with authority and submissiveness.” Said Brother Will.

“I’ve been on my own a long time, I don’t have a lot of experience working as a team.” My head was down when I answered, I won’t lie part of me got butterflies at the compliments.

“Well you have two choices Pledge. You can be sexy butler for the sorority house just next door, our sister house. Or you can be a sexy butler here.” Brother Percy spoke with a smile on his lips. This was a personal trial, they know I don’t like serving others.

“What do you mean sexy?”

“I mean this is what you will wear for the next two days.” He threw a black and white thong with a bow tie on the front of it at me.

“And you will do as your are told, regardless of the request. The only choice in the matter is this house or the girls house.” Leo’s voice sounded amused. From the looks on their faces they were waiting for me to say the girls house. Yeah, cause that’s what I want. A bunch of girls pawing at me and using me like a sex toy, little did they know I couldn’t get it up for a woman if I tried. I would have better luck here. That was the decision though wasn’t it? I could go to the girls house, fail, and get kicked out for not being able to complete the task. I could walk away from all this, get kicked out now. I’m not the type though, I don’t back away from a challenge. Even though I was doing this all for Frank part of me was doing it for me. I wanted to see if I could see it through, a personal challenge. Plus if I backed away now all the work this week was for nothing. Through the week I found the perks of being in a frat, the networking, grade breaks, discounts in over a hundred companies, loan opportunities that others don’t get. Being part of this brotherhood would only help me in the future. Plus the worst that could happen is a gang bang with all of these dudes, and that’s nothing. I’ve done worse for less. Plus that’s not even a guarantee, for all I know the worst of it could just be them grabbing at me trying to make me uncomfortable, small dick jokes (though I knew that wouldn’t happen once I put on that thong) more like big dick jokes. I might have to do a few handjobs if I was being realistic. None of these guys was bad looking, Will especially was handsome. If the worst that would happen was me getting hollowed out by five hot guys I can do that standing in my head... hmmmm that might be an interesting position honestly.

“I’ll take this house if you don’t mind brothers.”

To be continued .... here https://archiveofourown.org/works/14132883/chapters/46744054

[blakes-seven-or-so-blog]

S1 E13: Orac

Gan, Jenna, and Avon are feeling ill. Blake pronounces Orac with a rolled ‘r’ and thinks there's something odd about the whole Orac situation. He makes Avon watch last week's episode in slow motion, something Avon completely forgets about by season four. They discover that the VW didn't break down because of the usual reasons but because of sabotage.

Cally uses a geiger counter on Avon and Vila and it clicks like a New Year's Eve noisemaker. Wait, they didn't decontaminate after returning from Cephlon?! How can they be surprised at having radiation sickness after spending all day on the Highly Radioactive Planet? They probably tracked isotopes all over the Liberator, too. Its market value just plummeted.

There are no decontamination drugs on their super-advanced spaceship, and their only hope is that Ensor will have some. Avon acknowledges that he and Vila share a few talents, among them ‘mortality’, which Vila finds unpalatable.

I am a little dubious about the idea that a drug could easily reverse the kind of severe cellular damage a lethal dose of radiation would cause, but: it’s the 28th century, and also it’s plot grease.

Iscandar! They can get a Cosmo Reverser there and cure the radiation damage... Oh, it's only Aristo. They’re screwed.

A kindly old man nearly has a heart attack in his solarium and checks the charge level on his chestronics. Hairy chests are so 25th century. He has a conversation with someone about the intruders that have landed nearby. His unseen companion sounds just like him and also like drunken bees and is talking out of a fern. The kindly old man hates unexpected visitors, and if you don't call first, consider yourself lizard food. I like this guy.

Travis and Servalan arrive and use the map Ensor, Sr. provided (why? why would he give them a secret map when he invited them?) to break in through the creepy lizard-man infested undersea tunnels.

Ensor needs the batteries his son was bringing because he has a primitive artificial heart that needs batteries every forty years. Here's my question: why did he wait until the very last minute to get replacement batteries? Did he forget? Did it take that long to find the right size? It's a mystery.

Orac gives Zen brain freeze and then starts talking through him. It accepts Blake's excuse for showing up unannounced and turns Zen back on. Zen finally has a paradoxical koan to ponder.

They're down to five teleport bracelets. Looks like it's time to draw straws and throw two people off.

Servalan gets groped by a lizard-man and Travis rescues her. She uncharacteristically sobs in horror like a damsel in distress. This whole scene annoys me. At least he doesn't attempt to comfort her; she would definitely stab him in his last eye. He dares Servalan to crawl and taunts her with the notion of staring at his leather-clad ass, but she haughtily reminds him whose ass is Number One here.

Orac arrives in his security sphere guise and starts giving snippy orders and warning shots to Blake and Cally. If they only knew that it would soon be the eighth 'or so'. Gan tries and fails to cheer everyone up by making sasquatch sounds from behind furniture. Avon, for the third time, gives Vila a backhanded compliment. Everyone is short-tempered in the face of imminent death.

Orac insists Blake and Cally enter a revolving darkroom door that rises from the ground. Blake jokes that they should catch the versatile flying jerk and give it to Avon as a pet, which is exactly what happens. They are taken deep down to an underground solarium. Ensor immediately charms them with his warm hospitality. He calms down after they tell him his son is dead and gives them the radiation drugs they need. Blake once again thinks Zen-assisted surgery will be a piece of cake.

Ensor wheels Orac out from behind the fern and it turns out to be a fish tank full of junk. Blake scoffs but Ensor says Orac is not a computer but a genius brain that can access every computer everywhere. Orac is Skynet but with Ensor’s personality; basically it’s a god-tier honey badger.

Travis crashes the party and once again has Blake in his grasp and loses him. I’m nicknaming Travis ‘Butterfingers’. Blake thinks pulling the ancient tunnel ceiling down onto his own face is a good idea despite Cally’s sensible suggestion to stick together. A lizard-man gropes Cally and Blake beats it to death with a rock. Ensor sits down for a rest and dies. I’m really sad about this, no sarcasm. At least his winning personality will live on through Orac.

Right at the greatest moment of Travis’s life, when Servalan says ‘go ahead and kill Blake’, Avon shoots Travis’s blaster hand off. He jokes that he missed and was aiming for Travis’s head. Avon is more than ready to kill Butterfingers and Servalan but Blake stops him, intending to just spread nasty rumors about them instead. Servalan blames Travis for everything again. Travis is so embarrassed he changes faces, eye color, and accent for the next season.

Travis is the unluckiest person in the universe. He probably locks himself in his quarters and cries afterward. His Blakeicidal dreams and his robot blaster hand have been destroyed in the most humiliating way possible, and the guy who installed his robo-hand is dead thanks to Servalan. The only thing he got out of this was a memory of his boss’s ass maybe. Poor Butterfingers.

Back on the Liberator, everyone is feeling better and they turn on the drunken bees. In Ensor’s voice, Orac immediately starts hurling insults. Avon is horrified. Orac goes on to inform them of his abilities. It takes exactly one minute before they tell him to shut up. Orac predicts that the Liberator will explode, and when he is evasive about the details, Avon gets even.

Orac’s shutting off sound is ‘exasperated drunken bees’.

Damage report:

- Ensor, Sr.

- Ensor’s fish and plants which were left to die

- a couple of lizard-people

- a couple of explorers whose skeletons decorate the tunnels

- Travis’s robo-hand, dignity, and what was left of his career

We never see Orac's flying sphere again, which is a shame. Ensor left it on Aristo and no one ever makes a replacement. He seems perfectly satisfied with being a brain in a box and unlike Krang never has himself installed in a body.

I like this episode because it introduces one of my favorite characters. Zen is condescending and passive-aggressive, but Orac is a complete asshole, yet invaluable to the Liberator crew. I also watched this episode repeatedly as a teen while half-asleep and dreaming so it was etched into my eternal memory extra-weird.

Next: Redemption

[astoldbytoria]

ATBT Review: “Ctrl” by SZA

SZA just let out her highly anticipated debut album “Ctrl” on June 9th, and I’ve gotten a solid two weeks to listen to it. I’ve been following her since her Soundcloud days, so I was definitely curious to hear her new record and pick it for growth. Luckily, she made it easy for me. SZA has considerably grown in her songwriting and production and it is clearly reflected by the amount of positive responses she’s received since the release of the album.

In my opinion, this album raised the bar for both traditional and alternative R&B. She did not settle for low droning trap-soul nor did she drown it with samples. She successfully created a record that is both alike and not like any other record we’ve heard recently. So I’m going to dive into each track one by one discussing their strengths and weaknesses below. Feel free to listen along as I break down each song (this review is kind of long):

Spotify Link: https://open.spotify.com/album/76290XdXVF9rPzGdNRWdCh

Apple Music Link: https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/ctrl/id1239976329

1) Supermodel

First thought: what a way to open an album. This track is definitely one of her statement pieces. It really brings in the tone of the whole album. She’s talking about really heavy stuff over an acoustic guitar that’s strumming a melodic chord progression. And this isn’t just “cutesy sad” stuff either. She’s writing a letter to this person telling them she’s leaving after realizing that they’re cheating on her and aren’t giving her the time of day in general. And don’t forget the part where she adds that she’s “secretly banging” his friend. Pretty intense stuff.

2) Love Galore (feat. Travis Scott)

This is such a strong single for this album. She called this one a “tropical bop” and I couldn’t agree more. If your head isn’t boppin during this song, you’re probably lying. The instrumentation is so lightweight and euphoric, even though she’s discussing some heavy experiences, much like “Supermodel.” The lyrics were masterfully filled with wordplay and double meanings. They are poignant and relevant to the dating experiences of today’s youth which is really important. Not everyone is loyal, not everyone is trying to date to marry – and she, at this point in her life, is not only calling out the people she’s dated for being like this, she’s also recognizing these ways in herself. The line “Why you bother me when you know you don’t want me? Why you bother me when you know you got a woman?” is so real for some people, and that’s what I appreciated. It’s the side of relationships that people aren’t brave enough to address because everyone wants to tell a perfect love story instead of recognizing the reality and the duality of love. The production is also so perfect because it feels like such a light, chill bop even though it’s calculated with many layers. Her collaboration with Travis Scott was such a smart decision and it was nice to hear a different beat and vibe from him that still goes along with his sonic taste. I will say though, I absolutely hate the way she pronounces certain words – like “negus” and “beaches” – but that’s just a personal pet peeve, so I digress. Love Galore is a solid song and one of my favorites. Beautifully crafted and portrayed.

3) Doves in the Wind (feat. Kendrick Lamar)

This one was funny to me because I was surprised at how many times and different ways they managed to say the word “pussy.” To me, this one was another statement piece. The lyrics were definitely cheeky and bold, which just pushed another characteristic of the album. SZA is so willing to be bold and blunt about her experiences throughout the album. I thought Kendrick Lamar as the feature was a brilliant decision. Who better to talk about the subject? The song was witty and interesting and draws the listener to the lyrics. And the beat is so relaxed compared to what they’re talking about. It’s not one of my personal favorites, but I recognize its purpose for sure.

4) Drew Barrymore

When I heard this, I was like “where was SZA in the 90s when alt-black girls had no voice?” because she would have definitely been they’re holy grail artist. It has such a somber 90s alternative rock vibe. I love that it addresses insecurity and low self-esteem and genuine feelings, especially in lines like “I get so lonely, I forget what I’m worth / we get so lonely, we pretend that this works.” She brilliantly portrays how these feelings can manifest themselves in relationships. So because of that, these lyrics are not only relatable, but eye-opening for some listeners. This was a strong one for me.

5) Prom

I really love the lyrics on Prom. It felt like she was talking about her insecurities and her shortcomings compared to her partner. She’s describing the right person at the wrong time for her, as if she’s not yet at his maturity level, which is something I can relate to personally. However, I didn’t know that this song was about this topic until I looked the lyrics and followed them. The music just doesn’t seem to match what she’s talking about at all. And in the prior songs, the music does contrast with the topic of the song but it’s done in a way that makes the two work together – not in this case, however. So unfortunately, this song kind of got lost among some of the other tracks for me.

6) The Weekend

This is the traditional R&B bop on the album. I love the Justin Timberlake sample. It was nicely hidden in the beat and was not at the forefront, so it meshed well overall. This was another song with bold lyrics. She’s talking from the POV of the “other woman,” a character that hasn’t really had  a voice in music. This is especially depicted in lines like “My man is my man is your man / heard it’s her man too” and “the feeling is wreckless / of knowin’ it’s selfish / knowin’ I’m desperate.” So this was a daring move for SZA. It definitely sounds like she’s okay with the whole idea while also knowing that it isn’t an ideal situation. Very interesting track. Lol

7) Go Gina

I really like the instrumental on this one. It kind of gives me A Tribe Called Quest vibes. However, aside from the clever line “picking up a penny with a press-on is easier than holding you down,” this one did not clearly convey the meaning of the song. From what I can gather, she’s comparing herself to Gina from the TV show “Martin,” saying that she is a woman that belongs to herself – any man that comes along the way will either be of value to her or easily disposable. And she will never be hung up on a man. So I guess it’s just a song that outlines that feeling of self-sufficiency. This one kind of got lost amongst the tracks, like “Prom.” Without fail, I seem to tune it out when it plays. It’s still nice to listen to, though.

8) Garden (Say It Like Dat)

This one is also one of my favorites. It’s another euphoric song with a chill beat and melodic sounds throughout. Lyrically, this one is stronger because she’s clearly in love with this person but is still insecure about herself, hoping that he “never finds out” the real her. But she believes that maybe he will love her for her because of the way he compliments her and treats her. I love how genuine that is and how we don’t like to address our fear of people seeing the real us. More importantly, I’m happy that she managed to make a 3:28 song that perfectly describes that.

9) Broken Clocks

If there had to be another single on the album, it would be this one. The production is so poppin’ it’s not even funny. My poor ’99 Camry can’t handle the bass whatsoever, but it still gets blared regardless (nah mean?)!! SZA tells us another story of her balancing love with work and how those things sometimes conflict with her time – hence, the broken clocks. The busyness of life can definitely affect relationships and I felt like she really captured that here. I loved the Joseline Hernandez strip club reference as well, it really tickled me. Lol

10) Anything

This one sounds the most dreamy to me. It also samples “Spring Reprise” by Donna Summer, which is a nice addition. She seems to be questioning her relationship, serving as the next chapter to “Broken Clocks.” This is definitely shown by the repeated line “Do you even now I’m alive?” She seems to be at the cusp of the relationship lasting and ending. I kind of hate how short it is though.

11) Wavy (Interlude) [feat. James Fauntleroy]

I love this interlude so much. I love the production. Again, it is so light and airy and dreamy. Lyrically, this one didn’t jump out to me at all. But I fell in love with the feeling that it gave me more than anything else.

12) Normal Girl

This one is another that kind of got lost amongst the other tracks for me as well. I think that lyrically it’s really strong because she’s trying to describe an idealistic version of herself. Furthermore, she’s wishing that she could just be a “normal girl” for this guy, and clearly she isn’t capable of being that for him. So it’s really relatable. But at this point in the album, the theme starts to really beat a dead horse, at least for me. I felt like she kind of explained some of these same feelings in songs like “Drew Barrymore” or “Garden.”

13) Pretty Little Birds (feat. Isaiah Rashad)

I was impressed by the metaphor she used, because it’s not that obvious. Yeah, she’s comparing herself to a bird but she’s also talking about how she wants to be open with her love interest, like a bird’s wings. And it also kind of dives into the fact that although she’s been through a lot of experiences, she is still open to a new relationship that allows her to “fly.” This is apparent in the line “my wings don’t fly like they used to / but I wanna fly with you.” Lyrically this one is really strong, and if you aren’t paying attention to lyrics, it’s easy for its meaning to “fly away” (all puns intended). It’s very dreamy and pretty. I grew to like this song.

14) 20 Something

It’s only fitting that that she ended with an acoustic song. Lyrically, this song is all-encompassing in so many ways that aren’t obvious. She’s acknowledging everything that happened in her twenties – including the good and bad. It seems like her relationship ended, so she is definitely being critical and saying that she’s “got nothin, runnin from love.” So in a way, she’s stuck in the “immature” mindset of her 20s. But she also says “God bless these 20 somethings” because although she views some of her experiences as failures, she also recognizes how they’ve shaped her into the person she currently is. Compared to the opening track, this one focuses on the self instead of the people that have wronged her and her spitefulness as a reaction to those wrongs. Beautifully written and the slow strumming guitar is always fitting for introspection. This song ends the album on a bittersweet note, and I really love that.

My Conclusion (finally lol):

I think this album is something that has been missing from music. It’s full of lyrics that are relatable, funny, poignant, and introspective. And although some of the topics are heavy and risque, SZA carefully managed to pair them with beats and instrumentation that was seemingly light-hearted. She was unafraid to be the voice of the side chick, the main woman, the insecure woman, and the woman scorned. And she did it all from the perspective of a girl, and more importantly a Black girl. While culturally, this album was so influential and powerful, its importance could get lost if you aren’t paying attention to the lyrics. Sometimes they were hard for me to follow by listening alone and I had to look them up just to understand what she was saying. So that could be improved upon for the next album. Otherwise, I give this album a strong 7. SZA has really changed herself and has completely grown into her sound. This was a striking debut.