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thelittleliars · 6 months

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Surprise

Natasha Romanoff x fem!Reader

Warnings: fighting, being drunk, mention of homophobia, mention of deceased parents, angst with a happy end

Words: 3.5k

Summary: You wanted to surprise your girlfriend but instead you were the one that got surprised.

A/N: Here it is: the Angst with a happy ending one shot as the majority of you voted for! Btw I did not proof read it so be aware.

Flying wasn't your thing; sitting for hours in a thing that is high in the air with nothing to do but to sleep, eat, watch or read something. And airplane was a capsule of boredom to you, that was why you'd never fly unless you had to. Unfortunately you had to fly for your job since it required you to fly overseas from time to time. This time you had a 15 hour flight back home, itching to not only to see your girlfriend Natasha but also to surprise her, your supposed flight was scheduled for only three days later and when you were given the go to fly back earlier you took the chance and told her nothing about it. You hadn't seen her in weeks so you were extra excited to see her again.

The uber stopped in front of your apartment complex, as you got your things out of the trunk you thanked them for the pleasant ride and wished them a good day. You were quick to arrive at your door, the apartment was one on the top floors, before unlocking it with the your key. The smile on your face vanished when you saw Natasha standing there with three people you had never met before. Your mood became a little sour as you didn't like that your surprise didn't go as you had planned. "Who are you?" You asked confused as nobody including your girlfriend made a move to introduce each other.

They stared at you with critical eyes, sizing you up and down as if you were a criminal or some other threat. The younger woman with blonde hair spoke up first. "Her family." Your heart stilled for a second thinking of meeting her family like this wasn't great but you dismissed everything quickly because you remembered that her family was dead. "No, that can't be. Her family died when she was young." You looked confused at Nat, then back at those strangers again. When nobody responded you got a bit anxious, Natasha wouldn't have lied about that right?

The man spoke up next, bringing you out of your head of spiraling thoughts. "Who are you?" But before you could answer that question happily, the other woman gave her thoughts to the situation. "She's most likely the roommate Natasha always talked about." Roommate. You whirled your head towards your red headed lover, looking baffled at her already guilty expression, pain appeared in your heart and you swore that nothing cut you as deep as the statement along with her silence and facial expression. You pursed your lips to hide how much she hurt you, it would be too embarrassing to throw a fit in front of her family. Natasha opened her mouth but before she got to speak you jumped in. "I just had a 15 hour flight and all I wanna do is take a shower and maybe a nap afterwards. I guess I see y'all later." You said to all of them before you fetched your suitcase and disappeared into the actual guest room that the two of you had for emergencies.

In the shower you sat down and let the water fall onto you. You overthought everything you thought you knew. It was obvious that it was her family, she lied about her parent dying. Why would she do that? And if she lied about that what else did she lie about? Evidently about your relationship. The roommate Natasha constantly talked about.. That statement hurt immensely. You couldn't understand why were a roommate, not even a very good friend no, just a fucking roommate. It made you angry, especially because you loved that woman deeply and it made you wonder if she actually loved you. You also deliberate about if you could ever forgive her about this betrayal.

After the long shower, your phone started ringing the second your t-shirt hit you body. It was strange for someone to call you at this hour but when you saw it was your friend Wanda you answered without a question. You couldn't get a hello out because she was talking fast. "Open your door, there's a surprise for you!" The excitement in her voice was refreshing after all the work talk you had done overseas for days. "Wands, I don't like surprises."

"I know and I'm sorry to do this to you but this one's really worth it. Please believe me and don't hang up!" You tried to put all the faith you had left in her and walked out of the guest room as held your phone against your ear. "I won't hang up don't worry." While you passed by the open kitchen-living room to get to the door, you felt the red head's and her family's intense eyes on you. You ignore them as you opened the door and there she stood, the great Wanda Maximoff with some tickets in her hands. She practically shoved them into your hands. Only then did you hang up the phone and looked at what the tickets were. Your eyes widen in shock before you threw yourself at Wanda, hugging her happily. Natasha jealously was seething so she decided to speak. "What is your ex doing here?"

You turned around smiling at her but not as bright as you had been a second before, you still waved the tickets with joy telling her what the tickets were for. "She got me tickets for a sold out Hayley Kiyoko show!!" Natasha knew how much that meant for you since you had never seen her live even though you had tickets for three concerts at one point. You hated it so much that your job always came in between the dates, making you sell your concert tickets of the singer that was your first crush and gay awakening. This whole situation gave Natasha another pang of jealousy, she should have been the one giving you the tickets, not your damn ex.

"The lesbian Jesus?" The blonde woman whose name you still don't know asked. You nodded and saw her face breaking into a proud expression. "Since when do you know that?" Natasha asked her sister in almost an insulting tone. "Kate Bishop, where else?" After Nat narrowed her eyes the blonde explained further with a shrug. "She told me that I need to widen my horizon in pop culture." At that you turned your attention back to Wanda, minding your own business while picking up your conversation again. "I- I'm.. thank you for the tickets Wands. I truly don't know how to thank you." She smiled at your overwhelmed but giddy state. "You could take me with you?" She joked as she also pointed to the tickets. You agreed to her idea incredibly fast, maybe a bit too fast considering that you had a girlfriend you usually asked and took with you to concerts. But in that split of a moment you didn't give a shit about asking her to go with you, going with your ex sounded way better. "It - it's tomorrow already. Wait, hold on. How'd you even know that I'd be back by then?"

"Oh yeah about that.. I might have talked with Josh." She smiled sheepishly. Josh was a mutual friend but also your co-worker. But you'd never have thought that Josh would talk about your (early) return. Especially since you told him you wanted to surprise everyone. "Are you lovebirds actually coming in or stay in the doorway all night?" Alexei teased you both, you didn't how how to feel about that. You were still together with his daughter and him teasing or shipping you with your ex was beyond something you thought you'd experience. The frown on Natasha face was something you didn't miss and you actually had to bite your tongue before saying something you'd regret. To your luck, because you knew biting your tongue wouldn't help for long, your lover pipped in. "They are ex-girlfriends and not lovebirds." She stated hard. Her father continued to reason with his daughter. "Doesn't have to mean anything Tasha bear. How often did your mother and I break up and got back together hmm?"

You ignored their conversation once again, turning to the red head that stood still in the doorway you told her to wait for you. "Let me switch pants and then we go get a drink somewhere yeah? That way we can catch up and they can continue having family time uninterrupted." Natasha wanted to interject, deny you going out with Wanda when she desperately wanted to explain herself but she feared that stopping you would dig her grave with you only deeper so she let you go. When you were about to leave, Yelena and Alexei teased you both a last time. You felt a bit bad for Natasha but it all were also a part of consequences of her actions. "Don't come home too late." Was the only thing she told you. You still heard Yelena's such a mom and Alexei's don't be a cockblocker Natasha through the door.

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You were passed out in Wanda's arms as she carried you bridal style towards your apartment. It wasn't planned that you drank this much alcohol, but once you got a taste of it you just couldn't stop, it numbed your feelings and problems that you badly wanted to forget. Natasha was at the door quick, relieved when she saw you in Wanda's arms, she lead you both towards your bedroom watching how your ex put you on the bed gently.

"Thank you for bringing her home." She commented. The other woman only nodded before leaving fairly quickly, not wanting to be there in case you woke up which she knew was unlikely but didn't want it risk it anyways. Hungover you was something she did not want to witness ever again.

The next morning was rather midday by the time you woke up. You walked into the bathroom first, quickly peeing and splashing some water on your face before wandering to the kitchen, there you saw Natasha sitting at her kitchen counter with a coffee in one hand and her phone in the other hand. "Morning." You hummed grumpily, acknowledging her without actually talking to her. She huffed before she tried to talk to you again. "Y/N I-" Natasha started but you cut her off immediately. "I don't wanna talk."

"But I really-" Her next attempt to talk got quickly cut off by you again. "I SAID I DONT WANT TO TALK NATASHA!" You didn't yell, you simply rose your voice a bit to get your point across. She shut up afterwards. "Gosh just give me space before you ruin my day. I still have a concert to attend to." Your words and the situation cut her deep, it hurt to know this side of you - that she was the reason for bringing this out of you and inflicting (you) pain. She never wanted any of this.

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After the incredible amazing concert you dragged Wanda into a bar to get some well deserved fries and drinks. It didn't last long until you spilled your relationship problems and some evil thoughts you had in your head. The cruelest one was to text Nat asking her if she'd give you permission to kiss another girl during Hayley's performance of Girls Like Girls. You'd never cheat but the itch to get back at her in some way for betraying you was big.

"I know you want to hurt Natasha back a bit because of what she did but is it really worth it? Wouldn't that just truly ruin your relationship?" Wanda was concerned about your state of mind and what you might would do. She knew how rash you were in doing something when you got hurt by someone close to you. "It's hardly a relationship if it's build on lies." You stated without any emotion in your voice and expression. This only showed her that her worries were valid. "Maybe she had a good reason for it." The red head tried so hard to see the positive but of course with your mood, nothing was getting to you.

"I can't think of a single good reason of why she'd lie about her parents passing. I also came up short when I thought of a reason of her hiding our relationship. Like I'd have understood if it were the same situation as it was in our relationship, when you were a baby gay with parents who oftentimes said homophobic remarks and you being afraid to come out. But her father and sister teased us lovebirds and it seemed very genuine, they weren't homophobic." At the mention of Wanda's past, she felt the need to voice her thoughts. "I still feel like they stopped with the remarks after catching Pietro watching gay porn." You gave her a tiny sad smile. "Well either way, at least you had the decency to tell your family that we were not only very good but also very close friends. I'm just a roommate to them."

"I'm sorry." She said it genuine, without any pity or whatsoever. You nodded but also sighed at her apology. "Not your fault Wanda. Don't apologize for something that's out of reach." It was quiet between the two of you for a long moment, eating and drinking to make it less awkward before you asked her if you could crash at her place. "Of course, you're always welcome." Later, right before you went to sleep, you texted your girlfriend that you'd stay at Wanda's for the night.

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When you got home the next day, Natasha was nowhere to be found, it gave you enough time to ponder if you should simply break up with her and get all your things with you, it would have been a coward move on your part and you were already cowardly enough by staging away from her the night before. You quickly changed into a new set of clothes the grabbing your headphones and went into the kitchen, getting out ingredients from the cabinets to bake something, you still needed to distract yourself before facing Natasha.

The second she entered the apartment and heard movements she knew were only yours, she stopped dead in her tracks as she wasn't expecting you to the apartment yet. She thought that you were staying at Wanda's for a while longer but since you weren't she took the chance to finally talk to you and explain herself. You were startled by the tap on your shoulder, you hadn't heard her come back with the headphones on yours ears blasting angry rock-metal music. Pausing the music and taking the headphones from your ears, you turned around to face Natasha, she had messy hair with dark circles and bags underneath her eyes. It told you that she had a sleepless night.

"I don't want to talk." You told her simply because it irritated you that she disrupted your baking time. She groaned in frustration. "But I need to talk. Y/N I want to fix my mistakes, I want to fix us." She was desperate, you heard it in her voice, but that still didn't change your mind. "Maybe the magnitude of your mistakes are too big to fix." The words you said left her stunned. With the little courage she had left she asked you the important question. "Are you breaking up with me?"

"Not yet." It came out weak, nearly matching the weak tone of the question Natasha asked second before. A bit of relieve flooded her system but she was still tense m, fearing your answer to her next question. "What's holding you back?" You weren't sure if you wanted to let her know your reasons but you ended up opening anyways. "My gut and my trust in you."

The silence that followed was nearly deafening, the redheaded woman simply was at loss of words because it felt wrong for you to still have trust in her. "I haven't shattered your trust yet?"

"Hard to believe right? Despite all your lies I still trust you.. even if it's on a thin thread." There was another couple of minutes of silence before she finally could apologize without you cutting her off. "Then let me apologize because I really have to apologize for how the other day went down. I'm sorry for lying about my parents and that I lied to them about our relationship. I didn't mean to hurt you but I did and now I have to own it up." She started before moving to sit down on a chair. "It's true that my parents died at a young age. Who you saw was my foster family, we didn't always get along which resulted in me distancing myself from them for a decade. It wasn't until we were a year deep into a relationship that we started to have contact again."

"But why lie to them about us? Your father and sister seemed pretty open about homosexuals." You asked, still confused about certain things that needed to be cleared up.

"My plan was to ease them in telling how I'm not only queer but more so a lesbian. Last time I really knew them they were homophobic so I was surprised by their remarks. I hadn't met them in person for so long, I guess they changed a lot during that time." You took your hands in hers. It was a small gesture of you supporting her in quietness. "I'm sorry detka. I should have told you a long time ago about my foster family. And also that I told them you were my roommate."

"I just don't get it. Why tell them we're roommates and not friends?" It was the question that plagued your mind. She bit her lips then shaking her head and looking everywhere but at you. "It wouldn't have been believable. I always ruined all my friendships." You squeezed her hands in hope she'd look at you again and she did even if it was only for a few seconds. "Is there anything else you lied about?"

Her eyes rose to yours, this time you could see her bare soul laying out for you. She removed her hands from yours before answered honest. "Uhh.. my job?" It was barely a second that passed by before you shrieked out her full name. "Natalia Alianovna Romanova!" She squeezed her eyes shut as her name fell from your lips like you called her satan, then she fumbled with her hands until they found yours again. With an honest look in her eyes she apologizes again. "Y/N I'm really sorry okay."

"Sorry doesn't make it better! Natasha you do realize how fucked up this is right? Especially because we talk about work at dinner every other day. Gosh." You felt sick to your stomach when you thought back at the countless of conversations you had. "If-if you're not a secretary then what exactly do you do?"

"I'm actually a SHIELD agent." She leaned closer to you when she noticed your lack of response. When you did reply it made Natasha even more nervous, anxious even, she feared that you decide to break up with her right then and there. "A SHIELD agent?" You repeated calmly, a bit too calm for your girlfriend's liking, a calm person is always one to fear during a fight, they most likely are already done with everything. "A SHIELD agent." Natasha confirmed.

"Were you going to tell me?"

"At some point." You nodded then removed your hands from hers all while you were telling her you needed to go back to baking, you turned around finished your cupcakes. Natasha stood there awkwardly, not knowing what else to tell you or where to go. When the first batch of cupcakes were done you held one in between your fingers, you walked straight up to the redhead with no expression on your face, her heart pounded so wildly that it felt like she was going to die. "As much as I hate you right now, I'm still completely and utterly in love with you." You offered her the cupcake that she gladly accepted with a small smile. "I might be an idiot for even attempting to forgive you but I can honestly see us having a great and long future together."

"I want that. The long and great future with you, I mean." She looked down and smiled shyly

"Good. But it can only happen if you won't lie to me anymore Nat. I'd rather be hurt by the truth than comforted with a lie."

"Okay."

"Okay?" She nodded. "Good. Now come here and give me a kiss."

"Can I eat my cupcake first?" She asked with a twinkle in her eyes. You shook your heard, told her 'no' before you grabbed her head and kissed her like there was no tomorrow.

#natasha romanoff x reader #black widow x reader #natasha romanoff #black widow #natasha romanoff x you #black widow x you #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #black widow x fem!reader #natasha romanoff x female reader #black widow x female reader

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evolnoomym · 2 months

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Bigger than the whole sky 🌌

Dbf!Joel Miller x f!reader

Pt.2🌠 | Main Masterlist | Joel Miller Masterlist

Summary: You meet Joel and well of course you fall for each other. It’s a bit bumpy since he’s your Dads best friend. But things seem to work out until they don’t anymore. One event changes everything.

Rating: 18+ mature content mdni!!!!

Word count: 5.1k

Warnings: no use of y/n, pov switches that might be confusing, female reader, reader has hair, reader wears makeup, reader can get pale, weight loss, implied childhood abuse, trauma, angst, heavy angst(?), implied smut, alludes to pregnancy, funerals, coffins, reader has no name only a bunch of nicknames, size difference, dbf!Joel Miller, mentions of throwing up, loss of a loved one, grief, depression (?), food and eating issues are mentioned, talks of having a baby, Blood, dark thoughts, intrusive thoughts, age gap, readers age is not exactly mentioned but Joel is 44, talks of getting married….

If I missed anything please let me know 🙏🏻

Authors note: this is for @almostfoxglove ‘s Angst Writing Challenge. Shoutout to her she created the moodboard, it’s sooooo beautiful. 🫶🏻

Shoutout to @thecutestgrotto and @cafekitsune for the dividers 💙

Disclaimer: English is not my first language so if you come across mistakes it might be due to that. This is also only my second time posting writing for a specific character. I’m totally here for constructive criticism or feedback on how to improve. In general I appreciate comments, likes and reblogs greatly. This not beta read btw only by my eyes and they hurt after starring at the screen for so long 🌌🫶🏻

And lastly I’ll leave some songs i listened to while writing <3

loml by Taylor Swift

Black Friday by Tom Odell

This is what the drugs are for by Gracie Abrams

I guess by Mitski

Present by Lloyd Vaan

Je te laisserai des mots by Patrick Watson

Home by Daughter

Allowed to be Happy by Gustavo Santaolalla

Song on the Beach by Arcade Fire, Owen Pallet

aisatsana [102] by Aphex Twin

Fourth of July by Sufjan Stevens

Francis Forever by Mitski

A House In Nebraska by Ethel Cain

Medicine by Daughter

Youth by Daughter

I can barely say his name by Patrick Jonsson

listen before I go by Billie Eilish

You remember exactly how you met Joel Miller, it was so simple. He was the one to give your Dad a job at the construction company he led together with his younger brother Tommy. In the beginning you only heard how great of a boss he supposedly was through your Dads stories.

Joel and him seemed to have grown into real good friends in the span of mere weeks. You always had wondered what the man from his stories was like in person, up close.

When you had to drive to the construction site to bring your Dad his lunch he had forgotten due to being a bit busy that morning. It seemed like your wishes to meet Joel would become reality. You didn’t think the big boss would spend his precious time with the actual building process but as you'd figure out in the future, Joel is a hands on kinda guy.

You must’ve looked super out of place and quite lost when he approached you. His Texas drawl still echoed through your head hours later. „Well Hello Darlin, lookin for someone?“ and if that alone didn’t completely blew you away, then certainly his stunning looks. When you turned towards the voice a tall, broad and awfully handsome man looked back at you.

After an awkward beat of silence he stretched his hand out towards you “Apologies sweetheart, should’a start with the name, huh?” Tilting his head slightly “Name’s Joel, Joel Miller.” At that you let your hand slip onto his outstretched one. His hand was so huge, warm and calloused. Shaking his hand kinda calmed you down Joel Miller was absolutely lovely. “Nice to finally meet the famous Joel Miller that my Dad keeps yapping about nonstop.” You giggled while cheekily winking at him.

That must’ve been a key moment for everything that was to follow. You’d see Joel again and again. Whether due to your Dad inviting the single, 44 year old Man over or due to you having to deliver your Dad’s forgotten food.

The tension was slowly building higher and higher between you two until one day in Joel’s office you could no longer hold back.

Joel stood in his office with you by his side, in front of a pinboard containing all sorts of information about his newest project. He was animatedly explaining processes you’d never understand in a million years. You actually kind of tuned him out and just enjoyed being unbelievably close to him.

Then his face kinda looked confused. Oh no he must’ve asked you a question. Shaking your head you say “Mhhh sorry, what did you just ask?” Joel tilts his head towards you the way he always does and then states “Ya didn’t listen to a single word I just said, right Sweetcheeks?”

He always comes up with the most ridiculous nicknames that cause a vicious pull in your lower stomach. You lost count of how many conversations with him ended in drenched panties.

“I….i -of course I was listening to you, why wouldn’t I?” You stammered a bit offensively, surely he’d see right through you.

“Hm kay, so what was I talkin bout, gorgeous?” He’s teasing at this point.

“Ok I wasn’t listening but that is a lot I don’t get anyway so can you really blame me, Miller?” You fired back.

“So, whatcha thinkin bout inside of that pretty little head of yours, instead of listening to me?” You just scoff at him “Let’s not pretend you don’t know exactly what I was thinking about Joel.” Pointing one accusing finger at his broad chest. At that motion Joel enveloped your wrist in one of his massive hands, pulling you closer that way. Until you were right in front of him, only a tiny space left between your faces. “Why don’t ya tell me whatcha thinkin about Baby?”

He must know, just by seeing how your eyes keep slipping down to glance at his pillowy lips, what is going through your head. You’ve been dancing around this topic, the tension, the pull towards each other, how forbidden it is for all of this to happen. Joel is your Dads Best friend and he’s twice as old as you are but you know that if you don’t kiss him right now you’ll go insane. It’s all you think about, kissing him and then some more.

For the first time in years you actually consider letting someone get so close again. Joel would never hurt you like the ones before him did, no, he’s mature and wouldn’t play any of those stupid games. You know how kind, considerate, protective and caring he is for the ones he loves. Sure it won’t be easy to explain any of this to your Dad but you can’t think about that right now, no, you have to kiss Joel, it’s the last thought before leaning up to push your lips against his.

One chaste kiss that erupted into a full blown make out session that only got interrupted by some frantic knocks at Joel’s Office door.

From that day on those meetings became a routine, in his office, his truck, his house or sometimes he’d take you out of town for a super secret Date. The thrill of hiding with the possibility of getting caught soon turned into shame for lying to your Dad so much. You wanted to tell him even though it scared you more than anything how he might react.

Surprisingly though he didn’t completely freak out, of course he was shocked and confused how this combination came to be. More than anything he took the lying personally and made clear that as long as you are happy, so is he. If Joel was the one then so be it, besides your Dad has a lot of respect for Joel and knows you're in good hands.

After 3 months of being an official couple Joel asked if you’d be happy to move in with him. You had to think about it for a long time, feeling quite guilty about leaving your Dad behind but he reassured you that he would be fine on his own. He told you that a grown woman like you shouldn’t have to live with her boring old man anymore than you already did.

So you moved into Joel’s house. And what followed were months filled with wonderful memories. Many barbecues were held, your Dad and Joel always standing at the grill together, each nursing on their beer bottles.

Whenever you wanted to try a new recipe your Dad was invited over so you could make sure he still ate enough, the night always ending with you sending him home with a bunch of Tupperware's filled to the brim with deliciously homemade meals.

When you wanted to paint the walls in the living room a new shade your Dad came over to help.

Making sure his baby girl is happy and content was your Dads number one priority.

Then one day you went over to his house to catch up a little bit, just you two having some Dad and Daughter one on one quality time.

He was so excited when you told him that Joel and you want to have a baby.

He told you what a great mother you’d make because of how wonderful you always have been with kids and how much you always wanted to have kids of your own.

To others it might’ve been weird to share such an information with their Dad but you have such a close bond that it’s not weird at all.

You were so happy on the drive home cuz you know what great grandpa he’d make.

It must've been exactly one week later when you woke up with an indescribable feeling in your chest. As if the world spun a little slower, or the air felt more compromising…whatever it was you couldn’t stop feeling like something had happened.

Your intuition only perked up more when your Dad didn’t show up for the usual Sunday’s breakfast you recently started doing.

After 8 calls that nobody picked up you told Joel you would drive over there and as if he knew that you would need him for whatever was awaiting you there, he came with you.

The closer you got to the house the worse you felt. Hands sweaty, heartbeat racing and your stomach felt like turning over at the sight of the house. Usually he would be up by now playing his obnoxiously loud music that you’d hear on the street through the open kitchen window. Instead it was eerily quiet.

When Joel had parked the car he told you to wait for him but you couldn't. You just ran up the steps, unlocked the door with your spare key and bolted through the house as if on instinct you skipped up the steps to his bedroom. You flung the door open and there he was. Just laying on his designated side with his glasses still on and one hand on his chest across his heart. He looked like he was just sleeping but deep down you knew he was not. You can’t remember a lot, only that you immediately bolted towards the bathroom to empty your stomach out, Joel came up too and tried comforting you through the heaving. Then he tried to get you away from the scene. Joel took care of everything while you just locked up inside of yourself. No tears, no screams, no words, not a singular reaction just nothing. Joel had never seen you look so…empty.

Later on the authorities would say it’s just natural cause, he simply passed in his sleep, nothing dramatic. Not the kind of closure you would have wanted. It didn’t matter how “normal” it was, your world stopped spinning entirely. Everyone seemed to go one but you just stopped.

Suddenly without any foreshadowing everything was completely flipped on its head. You loved him so much, he was your best friend. He told you all the time how much he loved you even with all your struggles. You’d never have to prove your worth to him; he'd love you no matter what. In his eyes you were a gift, opposite to your mother that looked at you as a burden. You never felt loved by her. She took away your precious childhood and forced you to grow up quickly. So you could take care of her. Even when you told her how close to the edge you were she always made everything about herself. Out of your parents the one person that actually wanted you, died and with him so did your willingness to continue with the fight against all your inner demons.

You lost yourself after that. For weeks you just slept, barely moving, only getting up to use the toilet and perhaps eat something small and drink a bit. Joel had to shower you, otherwise you wouldn’t have done it yourself. Who you were before losing your Dad was gone, as if you died with him.

Joel tried everything in his power to make you feel better. One time he wanted to paint with you since you loved to do that, but the moment your eyes caught sight of the little paint pots you ran for the toilet to empty out your stomach. Later on he realized his mistake, you used to paint with your Dad a lot all the way back in your childhood so of course that would not make you feel better. Then he tried playing music for you either your favorite songs from your playlist or on his guitar. Nothing, you just continued to be completely catatonic.

Then the funereal came, a day Joel dreaded he was not sure you’d be able to handle it. In the morning he made your hair and applied a bit of makeup, he watched you do your little routine often enough to know what he was doing. Afterwards he dressed you in a simple black dress and equally black flats. Walking only worked since Joel kept you upright.

Sitting in the front row bench at the chapel you looked like a ghost. Pale and sunken in. You were asked to do a speech about your Dad but that would’ve been impossible. So Joel went up to do it instead. You just stared straight ahead at the coffin, not sparing a glance towards Joel.

And once everything was over, the people, mostly his colleagues, paid him their respects. When everyone was gone you stayed and just laid your head on the coffin silently sobbing, which was the most emotion Joel had seen in weeks from you. Only he was to witness this vulnerability.

Staring at the completed grave was just as daunting. His name is written in cold stone. All that’s left is this hole in the earth and a stone on top with his name.

You walked away without sparring another glance toward the grave.

Then it seemed like you were getting better. You spoke more, ate more and slept less. You even searched out body contact with Joel, though it was just some cuddling and gentle kissing. But he took it as a step in the right direction.

You almost fully returned to your old self but Joel could have not predicted how wrong he would be.

He should’ve listened to his gut that told him something was off when you didn’t kiss him goodbye before he left for work that morning.

You know how hard it will be but there’s no other choice. You have to get away, you have to leave so he can find someone better, someone who deserves a man like Joel Miller, someone less troubled, someone normal.

Those fears you have now, always were inside of you but with your Dad passing they just all came to the surface. Grief killed you, it took everything, it’s as if you're in a room with a beautiful glowing bulb and some dark entity just rips it away. You're left in the dark and not even Joel’s light can make it better.

You lost something nothing can replace.

All your life you feared what would happen if you’d lose someone like this without any way of getting closure, he died without any warning just poof and gone he was.

Your final goodbye was never said.

Now you can’t remember how he used to be, you only remember him laying in his bed without moving a damn muscle,dead. You were the one to find him and even though it was not some unsettling scene it’s not leaving your head. You try hard to remember how he spoke that sarcastic tone he usually used.

You can’t remember his face anymore, not even looking at pictures brings him back and at the same time he’s all you think about as if he’s haunting you. You hate him for leaving you so early. Why him? What kind of curse was laid upon you that everything always seems to fall apart when you think it’s finally working out.

It’s as if some higher up can sense that you are happy and content with your life and they don’t want to give you that sorta life.

The moment your brain processed what had happened you fell into the darkness like a big hole that sucked you in without any way out. Anyone around you could be another loss so what do you do? You leave, you disappear so no one gets hurt by whatever is wrong with you.

Looking at yourself hurts because it’s him you see and it’s him you hear in your head he’s everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Sometimes you feel like you’re hallucinating because you swear to see him round the corner, you can almost hear him call out but when you try to look there’s nothing.

Sometimes but much rarer than you’d like to admit you’ve visited the grave, sometimes you speak to no one. Sometimes you scream in agony till you almost lose consciousness from the lack of oxygen. Sometimes you just stare.

It’s a sick twist of events considering how often he walked on cemeteries with you as a child. You didn’t understand the meaning behind them back then, you only loved to admire the beautiful flower ornaments laying on top of the graves. Your dad always told you how soothing these walks seemed for you.

One time he took you and you had so much fun admiring the flowers giggling and smiling. Your dad wanted to tell you off since it’s a place where people grieved especially with a woman sitting nearby crying. He went to apologize to her on your behalf but the woman told him not to. She thought it was an uplifting sight to see little you having so much joy about the flowers, that’s a story he always kept telling you again and again.

All your life those walks soothed your frayed mind. The quiet somber energy is something no other place could compare with. Now it’s the last place you’d wanna be in. The moment you step foot on the property, the panic starts to creep up on you. The closer you get to him the worse it gets.

Sometimes the voices in your head scream to just start digging into the earth to get him out of that godforsaken coffin. Look at him, do something to bring him back. If the devil would show up to take you instead of your dad you’d do it. He was a troubled man but he tried so hard. He did not deserve any of this, he should’ve been here for all the good times yet to come.

You imagined him walking you down the aisle, having that stupid first look with him where he’d surely try so hard not to cry but looking at his baby in a wedding dress would’ve been way too much for him to stay strong. You imagined having your first dance with him.

You imagined how excited he would’ve been to hear that he was going to be a grandpa. In your head you can see him with a little baby that looks just like you. But none of this will ever happen; he's dead.

Sometimes it’s hard to even look at Joel. He's connected to him as well; he was his boss and one of his closest friends. It’s not fair you know but in your head you see Joel and your dad laughing on the porch about some old men shit like always making their awful dad jokes. Or drinking a beer together or looking to fix something around the house.

The house, Joel’s house and a place your dad spent a lot of time in. Walking through the hallways is not pleasant anymore, the couch is avoided as best as you can. He used to sit here all the time watching soccer games with Joel. The chair at the dining table he always sat on had to be removed simply seeing it made you sick and eating was already a hefty struggle since he passed.

He left a mark anywhere and all of it was getting too much. The pressure in your head becomes more and more unbearable.

Even though you tried to push all those negative festering thoughts away the voices could not be shut up no matter what you tried.

The worst was when they started to go for Joel, suddenly all you could think of was how he’d die. Joel is only 10 years your dad’s junior. So if he died then why not Joel too.

So many horrible scenarios played out inside your mind. Car accident, some freak accident on a construction site, getting attacked by multiple people, torturing him slowly, beating him to death, his head all split open, blood everywhere, or what if he gets shot by some crazy Texan who loves guns. There really was not a scenario left to imagine.

Nightmares in the most cruel ways destroying you slowly from the inside out. And that just proved how one thing can make an avalanche of events happen. He was your purpose for most of your life, you only continued to play this game called life because you could not leave him. And now he left you.

One time he told you how if it weren’t for you he’d be dead or in jail since there would be no reason to give a damn about his life. He was just like you, living for others instead of for himself. No one understood you like him. Somewhere deep inside you know he wouldn’t want you to blame yourself so much but that singular fact does nothing compared to all the ever suffocating darkness.

You’d give anything to have him back, feel his warm embrace one more time, hear him say how much he loves you, have him tell you one of his stories, have him tell you it’s going to be alright, take one more look and inhale his signature scent. You have one of his shirts doused in his favorite perfume, it’s what you used to do in all those years you lived far away from him during childhood. Now it does not help like it did back then. What remains of him? Nothing, all of his stuff shoved into a storage unit looked up, buried just like him.

You know Joel tried hard to be supportive and not push you too hard. Sometimes you wished he would’ve just screamed at you, slapped some sense into you and told you to stop being such a disgraceful mess. That’s what they would’ve done.

But Joel is not like that, he helped you so much. Putting himself so far behind. So much so that you feel sorry he has to deal with an ill girlfriend, that’s what you are, a mental wreck.

He deserves better treatment than the lackluster one you have given him in the last months. He deserves to be free of your weight dragging him down towards the abyss. Even though he told you in the beginning that he loves you with all the baggage and all the challenges, you cannot let him continue to waste his time.

Besides you’re convinced he’d leave you anyway like everyone before one way or another you end up alone. You have no control of the situation but if you leave then you have the control it still hurts but it’s the only option in your head.

The decision was made weeks ago, it felt wrong to lie to Joel to keep him thinking everything is fine only to then rip it all away but perhaps it’ll make him hate you so it’s easier. If he hates you then he will be able to move on with his life. Burn all you build together down.

And then you knew today would be the day. You couldn’t bear to kiss him in the morning; it would only make everything harder. Some time after he left you got up. One last time using the shower you both occasionally used together having foam party’s, giggling, washing each other and then kissing, touching till it leads to you with your cheek squished against the tile and Joel behind you ferociously hitting that special spot inside of you, till you both reach your high. Now you’re alone staring at that specific spot in the tiles, too much so you turn away.

One last time looking at yourself in the mirror above the sink, the mirror Joel and you both looked into while brushing your teeth. You dry your hair, put on fresh clothes, nothing too dramatic, just some simple black leggings and a black cotton shirt.

Then you start packing the most important stuff into two big suitcases. Basically only clothes, some hygiene products and a few trinkets that you don’t want to leave behind. The rest can be either sold by Joel or thrown away. You don’t care, the less holding you back the better.

Once the suitcases are packed you haul them down the stairs towards the front door. And then you just wait. For hours you sit at the dining table just staring ahead at the wall opposite where so many photos of Joel and you hang so many memories and you’ll destroy it.

You should feel bad but these days you barely feel anything, numb is what you think you feel most of the time. Maybe that’s what your ex meant when he said that you don’t own a heart, that you’re a cold blooded mean person. Someone who plays with people until they stop serving their purpose, that's what he said.

It’s almost 8pm, Joel should be home soon. You have practically studied the words you’ll say. An Uber already ordered to arrive 15 minutes after he should get home. Not much to talk about the less the easier so you can just walk away.

Then you hear it, Joel’s truck driving up the driveway and coming to a halt. How he gets out and slams the door shut behind him. His keys jiggling while he searches for the right one. Unlocking the door and closing it behind him. You don’t turn towards him although you know he must be looking at you in astonishment. He can not miss the suitcases and something about the lack of his words tells you he knows exactly what this means.

Joel cannot believe what he walked into, he knew something was off but just thought that he was starting to imagine things but here you are sitting like an empty shell of yourself and the packed suitcases can only mean one thing, he tries his hardest not to freak out that won’t make anything better.

He starts walking towards you, slowly, once he reaches the threshold of the living room he speaks up

“Moon, Darling what’s goin on?” He immediately continues “What’s with those suitcases, huh?” He can’t even hide the nervous quiver in his voice.

You turn to finally look at him with empty eyes, get up and walk up to him and then “I have to leave.” And with that you move to walk past him but Joel stops you by reaching for you arm, you immediately pull your arm away hissing “Don’t fuckin touch me Joel.”

He’s stunned by this harsh rejection, his expression full of hurt. Yet he persists by getting close, grabbing your face with both hands, his warm calloused hands that you love- loved so much. He urges “Talk to me baby, what is going on, why would ya need to leave?” Even with everything he tried to be gentle, his voice panicked yet almost just a whisper.

He can see in your eyes some sadness creeping in when you mutter “Joel..-“ you take one deep inhale “-…this House no longer feels like home.” He can tell even with how hard you try to appear collected that it pains you to say those words. “Wh…what do ya mean? If- if the house is the problem we can just move.” You cut in “No Joel, no i..I don’t love you anymore. Ok? I can’t stay here any longer.”

It’s a punch right into his gut there’s no way you are serious. “Baby all ya stuff is here you can’t just leave.” He tries to find something to buy him time. “I don’t care Joel just…just throw it away or sell it or I don’t know fuckin burn it. I won’t need it anyway.” He’s so shocked that you use that to continue your path towards the front door and the waiting suitcases.

On top of one suitcase lies a tote bag containing your phone, a jacket and your wallet sits. You swing it over your shoulder, you can hear that Joel has started crying, his huffed breaths are all you can hear.

That’s when a car starts honking outside, the Uber is here, you go to open the front door twisting the knob you can hear him walking up behind you with heavy steps. You open the door anyway with him at your back and you move the suitcases out onto the porch. Joel’s trying his hardest to contain his sobbing to a minimum but it’s hard he loves you so much, he thinks about the ring in his wardrobe hidden behind stuff you’d never go for and he thinks about the talks you two had of having a baby. If only he knew

His heart is breaking watching you walk away from all of it. You turn to him, one last time, he looks shattered, you've never seen Joel like this, you give him a nod as if to give him the ok to touch you one more time if only to give some kind of closure. He moves closer without hesitation and takes your face in his hands once more and leans his forehead against yours. His frantic breathing collides with your face and then “Wh…why Baby just why?” He sobs A simple question and you decide to give him at least something you reach up to put your hands over his to get him to open his eyes.

“Joel I’m not myself anymore, i-…i feel so all over the place and I’m so scared.” Tears start clouding your sight. “I need to be away from everything. I need to be alone far away to just maybe find some peace. I need to be gone.” And the tears start falling “No matter where I look I can’t stop seeing him and it’s crushing me.” Now you're full on crying. He’s processing what you’re saying and somewhere in his mind he understands that, still he can’t believe this is it.

“Ok-….if ya need to go at least promise you’ll give some sorta sign ya alright?” He looks desperate “Please Baby….please just a text something anything.” You only nod and then pull out of his grasp, take the suitcases and shakinly make your way to the Uber. Joel can only watch and hope you’ll stick to your words, hope that you’ll find some kind of way back to yourself.

The Uber driver gets out as you approach and opens the trunk helping to put the suitcases in there. Then you walk to the right door on the back, open it and hesitate for a moment. Joel holds his breath but you continue to slip into the backseat. Closing the door and off the car goes. Joel doesn’t know for how much longer he stood on the porch long after the car was gone. What was there is no more.

Npt: @almostfoxglove @joelmillerisapunk @aurorawritestoescape @milla-frenchy @joelslegalwhre @thundermartini @studioghibelli @sizzlingcloudmentality @vivian-pascal @strang3lov3 @xdaddysprincessxx @mountainsandmayhem @mrsmando @joelsgreys @janaispunk @the-mandawhor1an @rivnedell (honestly I’m tagging pretty randomly, sorry) 💙

Please don’t repost, copy, translate, or feed into any AI, thank you 🙏🏻

#Joel Miller #joel miller one shot #dbf!joel #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x female reader #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal #angst #almostfoxgloveangstchallenge #Mina’s writing #my writing

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excalibur-gone-missing · 5 months

Text

Paring: jeonghan x fem!reader

Requested: yes [Can you please write something angsty for prince DK? Or if this is too vague, what do you think about a bet au with Jeonghan?] [By anon]

Genre: angst, coworkers to lovers, fluff, fuckboy au, opposites au, bet au

Warning(s): misogyny, jeonghan is an asshole and so is seungcheol, [if you find more pls inform ]

Summary: Jeonghan had plans on never talking to the quite coworker they hired, but like doesn't always pan out the way we want to. But when you add money to the problem, plus both your feelings, you have the perfect recipe for disaster.

Word count: 5.2k

Other works

disclaimer: this is not the exact representation of the subjects in real life. I just use them for my inspiration.

a/n: I request each and every one of you to comment on this fic don't be a silent reader it helps me as an author to understand my readers and i would love to communicate with all of you. Constructive criticism is always welcomed by me so do talk about this fic or send me an ask.

a/n 2: i hope it was what you wanted, thanks for the ask btw!

Everyone at the office knew that Jeonghan was a free spirit, he worked hard and partied even harder. He like living his life in the most happening way possible. Be it weekend trips, bike trips to the mountains or staying in the countryside for a week and working remote while enjoying the serenity that comes with it, he was down for anything.

Funnily enough he was referred to as the least energetic person in his friend group. So, one can imagine overzealous they normally were.

His work more often than not was impeccable, no one could fault him at all. The rising star of the corporate world they called him at the office. In his five years at the job the man had garnered more approval than anyone else.

He liked his life, and he would not trade it for anything else.

Now, unlike Jeonghan you resided on the other side of the spectrum. Your kind of life was pretty monotonous waking up before your alarm, making your bed, skipping meals, and surviving on coffee, reaching, and leaving work on the dot and crying while rewatching your favorite shows, was your kind of life. You like staying in during the weekends and cleaning up the mess you make in your living space during the weekdays and trying everything in your power to not upset your cat while doing so.

Its calm, chill, maybe a bit boring but it worked for you and brought you peace.

You were the newest recruit in your office and from the first day you captured the attention of most of your coworkers for your meticulous and polite words.

More often than not you refuse to talk to your coworkers ensuring that there stays a professional boundary between you all and if they would not catch onto your behavior, you would politely decline them.

Never that interested in networking, you refuse to talk to more people than you need to.

Jeonghan caught onto it pretty early, but why did it matter to him what you did, so like everyone else he went on his own way and simply chose to ignore you.

Ten months into your new job was when you first had a real conversation with the man. It was pretty late at night, both of you had to stay back for overtime. That was when you saw him struggling with his presentation for the next day’s meeting.

That day you broke the ‘no talking to my coworkers rule unless and until it’s very important’ rule.

“what’s the problem?” you politely asked the man.

“Oh, I am having slight problem with the numbers here,” the man replies looking visibly confused and surprised.

“If you want, I can help you out” you kindly stated as Jeonghan casually just turned his laptop towards you.

So, for the next one and half hours you both sat there and diligently worked on the presentation and by the end of it the material looked rather good and presentation worthy.

Looking extremely grateful the pretty man said, “I am so thankful you helped me out today, so why don’t I repay you by dropping you off at your house, it’s pretty late you know.”

Looking at your watch you politely replied, “no worries, plus if I rush a bit, I can catch the last bus home so please don’t bother.”

Jeonghan looked bummed at this, but he was obliged nonetheless as he knew you to be an introverted lady and he did not want to make you uncomfortable.

The next time you and Jeonghan had a conversation, was again at a night when you both were staying at the office over time. By this time, you have become pretty comfortable with each other, not enough to hold a conversation but enough to spare a quick nod and a smile while passing by each other’s cubicles.

He was done with the day’s work and was about to leave the office when he noticed you hunched over your laptop looking frustratingly at your screen which showed you an open excel sheet with infinite numbers.

Feeling like he owed you the help, Jeonghan strode towards you and calmly said “let me see.”

Jumping in shock you looked at him and replied, “oh no don’t bother I can figure it out you should go home it’s pretty late you know.”

Tsking at your reply he grabbed a chair to sit beside you while saying “it’s only fair, you helped me out so I should help you now.”

You let him, in actuality you needed that little help from him, the data entries were annoying you and you absolutely did not like it one bit.

Just like that time passed by again resulting in the clock to show that it was quarter past one by the time you both were done.

This time though Jeonghan shut down all your protests to go about his own way and your reluctance to inconvenience him with a simple “it’s pretty late and I won’t let you get followed by some creeps on the road plus the last bus is gone anyways so you are coming with me.”

On the way he stopped at a convenience store to get some dinner for you both and you devoured your ramen while chatting with him.

You both were pretty similar, in some cases for example you both had this extreme love for Legos that existed beyond measurable amounts, both of you loved your pets to death, albeit his was a rock and yours was a cat, but as he said “we don’t discriminate peoples pets here, they can have what they want to but given its legal and safe for the pet.”

On the other hand, Jeonghan liked you too, he was happy he could be the first one to break your shell to meet the real you and he was proud of this. It was close to an achievement for him.

“Han like this new chick in his office.”

Joshua loudly announced to the group of boys sprawled in his living room one evening. Jeonghan’s friends had come to his house to hang out and to get drunk out of their wits to forget the stress of the tedious weekend they had. They were all friends from college, now working jobs in the most contrasting industries ever like Seungcheol was the manager for their states football club and Soonyoung was a choreographer working with famous celebrities, Hansol on the other hand was the proud of a pet shelter and the one and only Joshua was an English history professor who most days worked overtime at the university. But at the end of the day, they were all the loud and obnoxious assholes he knew and loved from his younger days, and nothing could compare to that.

“Really you never told us about this one hyung?” Mingyu enquires.

“Nah she is just a new hire at the office, does not like talking to people at all. She is more antisocial than Wonwoo’s ass.”

“Really now, antisocial?” Seungcheol enquires, not missing Jeonghan’s defensive tone.

“Yes, Cheol antisocial, plus I don’t even know her enough,” the male says while rolling his eyes at his friends interest with you.

“Maybe you could talk to her and get her out of her shell, you are a pretty good mediator in our group I think you could do that,” pipes up the ever so benevolent Seokmin.

“Yes, you could,” Seungcheol joins him smirking a bit.

Now thoroughly annoyed Jeonghan exclaims “no I cannot. The only way someone can get that stuck up bitch out of her shell will be fucking her or something and I do not want to do so!”

“What if I pay you, will you do it then,” Seungcheol says still smirking.

“Do what?”

“Fuck her enough to get her out of her shell.”

The whole room goes silent at that statement.

“Hyung, I don’t think it’s right,” the youngest of them, Chan, suddenly speaks.

“Yes, its morally incorrect man,” Jeonghan agrees.

“I will pay you, plus life is pretty boring. This will give us something to talk about for at least the next year,” the oldest explains still smiling a bit.

“I agree with the others, its emotionally taxing and nothing good will come out of doing something like this man, plus what are we teenagers making bets about emotionally harming others?” Joshua says.

“Jeonghan, you do it and I will give you a thousand bucks,” the oldest says calmly. At the same time all the men in the room let out an exasperated sigh, knowing there is no winning with this stubborn man, while hoping silently that Jeonghan does not succumb to the greed.

But alas they were wrong, so wrong. An amount that lucrative will only be passed by a fool and Jeonghan was no such thing. He stood up from his place at the loveseat and confidently strode over to Seungcheol.

“You better keep your fucking word,” he says while shaking the older man’s hand.

While Seungcheol smiles and says, “you know what you complete the bet within the next six month I’ll give you a five thousand and if you don’t end up doing it, you gotta pay me pal.”

After that evening with his friends, Jeonghan was pretty stressed, because why should he not be? Making you sleep with him is hard enough, but making a situationship out of it sounds even harder. Now he thoroughly regrets accepting the bet.

You on the other hand are pretty happy and quiet as you often are. Very much unaware of his internal turmoil, as you keep talking excitedly about the new Lego death star you bought.

Yes, you and Jeonghan have bonded quite a bit these past few days, he likes spending time with you too, and so do you. It is a nice and comfortable friendship you both have built, and you like it.

“Why don’t you let me come to your place this weekend, and we can build the set together. We can get takeout later too,” he suddenly speaks up shocking you with such forward proposition.

“Well only if you want to though no pressure, it’s just that I really wanted to build the death star and was planning to buy it but like couldn’t make enough time to do –”

“Sure, you can come,” you speak up stopping his nervous rant.

“Are you sure?” Jeonghan asks just to make sure he heard it correctly.

“Yes, I am, it will be fun to build the Lego set together,” you say smiling.

“Yes, it would be, but like are you really sure,” he says again to make sure he is really not hard at hearing.

“Jeonghan if you ask me once again, I will take back what I just said.”

This makes him stop talking at all and he proceeds to show you his beautiful smile, making you feel a bit giddy inside.

“So, I will come this Saturday and we shall make the death star cuz we can,” he sings, making you bark out a laugh at him.

Little do you know you just poured a cool bucket of water on the burning flames on anxiety inside Jeonghan’s brain and he is extremely happy about that.

The next Saturday comes rolls in slowly, the tedious and boring week is over, and it is time for self-care and a lot of friendship building activities or that’s what you thought.

The man was mad and when you say mad you mean it. The Lego making only lasted for like two hours before he had hidden all the pieces of the part that you were making, resulting you to search for them all over the house. Moreover, after diligently searching and finding nothing, you had given up when he had produced all those pieces from his pockets shocking you to the core.

This little stunt had made you force him to pay for the takeout and when you were both fed and watered, he had proposed a game of chess. Only problem, you never knew one could cheat in this game too. He moved the pieces wrong.

Result. You both had the pettiest fight ever wherein the man with all his might tried to convince you that the rook was indeed supposed to move diagonally.

“You don’t understand, that is how the game is played. Are you sure you ever played this before?” he had asked.

“Hani you are wrong, please the rook never in its whole life moved diagonally, it always moved straight.”

“Maybe that is what your problem is, you are so uptight, you refuse to accept the differences in our opinions!”

“Oh, now I'm uptight, you are only being this difficult cuz you are losing!”

“I wouldn’t if you let me play the rook diagonally.”

“But that is not how it is played! Why don’t you—"

All your rants stop just like that, it took you at least five business days to actually realize that Jeonghan had kissed you. But once you got over that shock, you closed your eyes and moved your lips along with his.

Jeonghan, thoroughly exasperated by your intense argument, impulsively sought to quiet you by placing a soft, lingering kiss on your plump lips. Almost immediately, regret washed over him as he feared he had acted rashly at the worst possible moment. Mentally preparing to distance himself from you for the rest of your time together, he was taken aback when you reciprocated the kiss, instantly dissolving all his worries and leaving him pleasantly surprised.

You broke the kiss to take a breath, both looking visibly flustered.

“Do you want to stay the night, or do you want to go?” you asked him while looking at him with your sparkling eyes, making Jeonghan want to glue his ass to your house, but he being the gentleman he was declined the offer.

“I would really like to take you out on a date. As I really like you, so I won’t spoil my chances with you by staying tonight.”

To say you were surprised would be an understatement. You always thought of the man to be a Casanova, so the idea of him taking you on a date while simultaneously insinuating that he won’t take any harsh steps with you was a nice little change and you were all for it.

It was all smooth sailing after that.

Jeonghan took you to an amusement park for the date next Sunday and oh boy did you enjoy yourself to the fullest.

Both of you had the time of your lives. Making sure to go on every ride, play every game and eating every junk you found there. By the end of it you were visibly exhausted and elated with how the day went.

The following day you were visibly happier in the office and even had a small conversation with one of your coworkers.

This went on for the following month, with each and every date you opened up to Jeonghan more and more, and so did he.

He loved spending time with you and vice versa. It was during your regular Friday movie nights, a ritual you both had established as you both liked watching movies and bonded while talking about them, when Jeonghan absolutely bored with the movie scooted a bit too close to you in hopes of gaining your attention by annoying you, a typical Jeonghan move. When you both ended up making love on the couch.

This was only the start of a lot of escapades you would have with the man.

After that one night, Jeonghan was all over you at all times. Be it at the office or be it at home he was with you or texting you all the time. Your nights were now filled with heavy make outs and intense love making sessions.

Everybody at the office knew about you both. On top of that you were more extroverted than ever. You even went out with your coworkers for an office dinner. Somehow, Jeonghan was praised for the change he brought in you, and like his ‘kind’ self, he declined all those compliments with a gracious smile.

He didn’t like to say it out loud, but he liked your changed self, more than your reserved one. Plus, he also took credit for the change, but it’s not like he would tell you that anytime soon.

It was almost five months into dating Jeonghan, when he asked you to meet his friends. You knew he had a very loyal group of friends and you had never met them before. On the contrary Jeonghan had met your one and only best friend within only three months of dating. In the most best friend manner, the lady has hated his ass the whole-time side eyeing him constantly and leaving petty remarks here and there. But that night she had called you and told you something she didn’t ever say for any of your boyfriends “I can see he loves you a lot. For the first time you chose the correct guy.”

Getting your strict best friend to like Jeonghan was like clearing the first hurdle of your relation. For the first time, you were proud of your choice in men and especially your boyfriend.

“Oh, I would love to meet them, but would they like me,” you were rightfully concerned about the boys liking you. As much as you were independent, you would like to gain the approval of your boyfriend’s friends like any girlfriend.

“They are dorks through and through, they will love, don’t worry” he had said while kissing your forehead to calm you down.

“Plus, you will fit right in, they are nice people,” he later added.

That evening, Jeonghan had taken you to the Korean BBQ place downtown where they all were meeting. The night had started rocky but within an hour you were having fun with Mingyu and Seokmin, all worries forgotten. Jeonghan had looked at you with pride blooming in his chest with how happy you looked with his friends, enjoying yourself.

It seems that all the twelve of them had liked you a lot saying you were the perfect partner for Jeonghan, someone who could ground him at the same time let him be himself.

The BBQ party came to an end, but the boys still had a lot of energy, so they went to the karaoke next taking both you and Jeonghan with them. Although you were thoroughly exhausted, you had complied to go, seeing Jeonghan have so much fun was a sight you didn’t want to miss.

You had gone to the bathroom the first thing right after reaching the karaoke place, to wake you up and also to do your business. Seungkwan had accompanied you claiming, “all that soju and walking has made my bladder shake like never before!” it’s not a lie though, they did drink like it will be the last time they ever get to drink.

As you came out of the restroom, Seungkwan gave you a kind smile and said “I have never seen Jeonghan this happy before, not even with us. I'm sure he likes you a lot.”

Smiling at him you said, “I think I love him; I have not said that to him yet, but I really think I do.”

With a sassy ‘good for you’ from the one and only Boo, you both made your way to the room that your group had booked.

As you reached closer, you could hear all the boys talking to each other.

“I approve, she is an angel, she even consoled Soon when he cried” said one of them making you smile a bit. By this time Seungkwan had stopped with you too eavesdropping on his friends as he is as dramatic as one can be.

“She is nothing like what you described her to be you know, she is nice and kind and far from being stuck up,” someone else said.

“Nah she is not, that stuck up once you get to know her, contrary to that she is very cheery and I like her you know,” Jeonghan had replied making you feel extra giddy inside.

“Hey bro if you like her that much maybe we should call off the deal we made, I see how much you like her and if you ask me, I will say she is a keeper,” with this statement, a silence washed over the whole group. You looked at Seungkwan to understand what was happening, but the man refused to look at you still stubbornly pretending to listen to the conversation.

“I said I like her, not like her enough to let go of the five thousand you offered” you suddenly heard Jeonghan speak making you even more confused about the whole ordeal.

“I think you will regret it you let her go hyung,” Seokmin suddenly said with a very somber tone generating a lot of assertive noises from the group.

“She won’t bring me five thousand, plus I fucked her got into a relationship with her and made her the fun-loving bitch she is now. It was a tedious process, but I completed my work, so I deserve the money.”

It was hard hearing the man you loved so much make such a degrading comment. At this point you were shaking with emotions so much that even Seungkwan who refused to look at you during this whole time, had to hold you steady.

“Did you know about this,” you asked him.

The boy with his eyes downcast just nodded his head.

“I won’t even ask you why you didn’t tell me about it, I get it you are his friend makes sense.”

“Hey none of us wanted him to do anything like this, but your Jeonghan is unstoppable sometimes and about the wrong things.”

“I think I should get going, I’ve heard enough.”

“Hey y/n we like you a lot, so please stay in contact with us later, no matter what your verdict is,” the younger man pleaded with glistening eyes, making you almost accept the request out of pity.

You ignored everyone and strode into the room bustling with men, heading straight for the couch. Without hesitation, you grabbed your bag and, as you walked out, approached Jeonghan and delivered a firm slap to his face. "We're done," you declared before exiting the room without glancing at anyone else.

The minute you had left, Jeonghan felt his life crashing down on him. The looks of disapproval from his friends and the pure disappointment that radiated off you caught him off guard. He had thought he could get out of it with both the girl and the money, but suddenly he realized he didn’t even need the said money, he only needed you. The weight of his words came to haunt me as soon as he had spoken them.

He immediately attempted to follow you but was stopped by Seungkwan, “did you see her face, if you follow her now, she will resent you more. Not like you don’t deserve it, but you are still my friend.”

The tone of his voice showed how much he was upset with Jeonghan. So much so that the younger male could not even look at his face.

“You are my hyung, but you know what I like her more, never have I ever thought you would do something like this,” he continued, “I hope she never forgives you.”

Hearing that Jeonghan couldn’t control himself and punched Seungkwan and a fight broke out. The boys trying their best to resolve it.

“It’s already a mess, can you both stop making it worse!” Mingyu said as Seungkwan punched Jeonghan back square on the jaw.

“Tell that shit to not meddle in my business then” comes Jeonghan’s voice.

“Maybe if you didn’t break her heart I wouldn’t, she was a fucking nice person,” Seungkwan shouted back as Mingyu dragged him out.

The night was ruined, and it was all because of Jeonghan.

That night you came home and cried your heart out ignoring all the calls from Jeonghan and the other boys, with whom you had exchanged numbers during the hangout. Thankfully, it was a Sunday the next day, so you didn’t have to look at the man who broke your heart, but it pained you so much to even move a muscle. It was like your heart was ripped out of your body. The pain was immeasurable.

There were at least a hundred missed calls on your phone and thirty of them from all of the boys. Your best friend come to your place that Sunday and tried her best to console a sad you, but nothing could stop you from beating yourself up for trusting a man like him. it’s true you loved him, and you regrated doing so, you didn’t blame Jeonghan for breaking your heart, you blamed yourself for being weak enough for you to let Jeonghan do so to you, for letting the man step all over you like you were a piece of trash that had no place in the normal world. The degrading things that he had said about you kept echoing in your ears, making it hard for you to think of anything else.

It was like you had forgotten all about your vow to never let anyone step over you and take away a piece of you from yourself. You were so hurt that you refused to see Jeonghan at all. So, on the next Monday you asked your HR for a weeklong leave and the kind lady obliged owing to your stellar performance at your department.

You turned off your phone that week and went to stay with you friend as the house was too lonely for you and the more you stayed there, the more you felt the memories of you and Jeonghan coming to haunt you.

On that Monday, Jeonghan woke up with a newfound determination. He was resolved to confront you and explain that his hurtful words from that night stemmed from his own inability to accept his feelings. He believed that once he clarified his side of the story, your compassionate nature would lead you to forgive him. He was even prepared to humble himself, willing to beg for your forgiveness if necessary. However, fate intervened when he discovered you had taken a week-long leave from the office.

The realization of consequences hit him suddenly. Yes, he understood the gravity of his actions, but he was willing to face any repercussions if it meant having you back in his arms. Anything seemed bearable compared to the thought of losing you.

By Wednesday, Jeonghan found himself standing at your doorstep, desperately knocking, hoping to speak with you. To his dismay, a neighbor informed him that you had been absent since Monday. His heart sank realizing he had missed his chance to reconcile with you.

He had made a solemn vow to himself that he would reach out to you no matter what obstacles lay in his path, willing to go to any lengths to make amends. However, he now realized the depth of his mistake. Reflecting on his actions, he understood that he should have heeded the advice of his friends earlier, but it was too late for regrets.

Jeonghan's determination to win you back consumed him. He felt a deep pang of regret for not acting sooner and for failing to appreciate the warnings from his friends. Now, facing the reality of your absence, he grappled with the weight of his impulsive behavior.

In the days that followed, Jeonghan resolved to wait patiently for your return, determined to seize any opportunity to make things right. He hoped against hope that he hadn't irreparably damaged the bond between you. Each passing day without you served as a sobering reminder of the importance of listening to his instincts and valuing the counsel of those who cared about him.

The next week you opened your phone to see it has blown up with Jeonghan’s messages and there were a few from Seungkwan asking you if you are okay and telling you that he had punched Jeonghan for being an asshole to you and that most of the people didn’t agree with Jeonghan’s antics but its hard to stop Jeonghan when is like that.

Taking pity of the boy you and answered him accepting his apology and telling him you were happy that he punched the guy.

His answer came immediately, saying he was happy that there is no bad blood among you two and he prefers you more than Jeonghan anyways making you laugh at his cuteness.

When you returned back to the office, the first thing you did was hand them your resignation letter. The next thing on your list was avoid Jeonghan till you leave work, at which you were pretty successful.

And just like that you were done with your time in the office and were moving onto another job before Jeonghan could even get hold of you.

Its has been three years since and life had never been better. You became friends with Seungkwan, Seokmin and Soonyoung immediately. You four hangout quite frequently. The three younger men like you a lot too. It’s a strong bond you have created with them. If anyone asks you would say the only good thing that came from your ex was the friends you made while with him.

On top of that you also have been in a relation with a man who treats you right and loves you to death. Its like you have at last reached the light at the end of the tunnel.

Jeonghan on the other hand drowned himself in work after you left, the man tried his best to forget your existence and was very thankful his work helped him do so. But whenever he was out with his friends he couldn’t stop himself from asking about you and always he got the same answer of ‘none of your fucking business’ from Seungkwan.

But it was different this time, it was the ever so kind Seokmin who answered him.

“Hyung she moved on, and you should too.” Hearing that he stood up, he didn’t know why. Would he go to your house and beg for your forgiveness again or will he call you while asking you to give him another chance?

Truth to be told, he didn’t know.

“Hyung please don’t mess this up for her. She is happy,” Seokmin spoke up again, kindly holding his hand to pull him down back onto his seat. It felt like Jeonghan’s life has come crashing down on him once again. One lone tear left his eye, too embarrassed to cry in front of his friends, he puts up a happy front while saying “of course Seok, I would do nothing to hurt her.”

All his friends looked at the man in pity, hoping that faith was kinder to him. but they couldn’t deny that he single handedly destroyed his life either. He was still their friend and he deserved to be happy to but so did you. The man sat in silence for some time till Joshua loudly declared he wanted to go to the arcade and all the others enthusiastically agreed, happy about the distraction.

That is when Jeonghan realized life has gone on and not stopped for anyone, the time he was supposed to seize his moment has passed and it wont ever come back. He now has to live his life without the presence of one of the most precious thing he ever had the privilege to possess, your love.

a/n 3: thank you all for reading !!

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sleepynoons · 2 months

Text

dr. ratio x gn!reader, sfw, not beta read

cw: explicit language

notes: college!au ratio is scrumptious + i love trying new characterizations of such a well-written character. some emotional angst regarding insecurities + never feeling good enough. platonic btw, though feelings spark at the end. also, requests are now open – please read all of my acc + request rules, which are linked in my nav. finally, repeat after me: YOUR HOBBIES DON'T HAVE TO BE YOUR JOBS.

YOU HAVE got to be shitting me.

you gawk as you stare at the student across from you. piercing eyes, gold laurel accessory adorning indigo hair, apron crisp and clean – why the hell is the veritas ratio here?

you’re a simple student. day and night, you’re studying to pass your classes and working a part-time shift as a barista at a local café to scrape in a little bit of extra cash. the difference between you and ratio is more than the distance between heaven and earth. the only time you ever interacted with your college’s “legendary genius” was at a study review session for one of your classes that he happened to be a teaching assistant for.

the first ten minutes of the session were wasted because ratio was criticizing the hell out of another student. to be fair, the latter was acting like an asshole. you had overheard some of the snarky comments they made about ratio as you all were waiting outside the classroom. but ratio was equally, if not more, biting and ruthless as he made comeback after comeback after comeback. you didn’t have a good opinion of him either. and so, you snuck out of the review session and never attended one led by ratio again.

you try to shift your expression into a more amicable one as you sit down next to him. out of all the places to meet him again, you would have never predicted it to be at your favorite pottery studio.

it’s fine, you think, it’s not like he knows who i am.

you’re not good at pottery – mediocre at it, at best. but the feeling of the wet clay against your hands, how pliable and cool and malleable it is, is soothing. even the sheer act of throwing a ball of it onto the wheel is stress-relieving. you frequent this studio once every few weeks or so, and it’s become something of a third home to you, a place that you can run away to really at any time.

ratio has accolades in the arts as well, especially renowned for his sculptures, so pottery doesn’t seem too farfetched. yet you’ve never seen him here before.

you’re deep in thought, until a steady voice interrupts with a call of your name.

you perk up, looking around. another call of your name. there’s no one else in the vicinity besides you and ratio.

you squeak in surprise. “oh! yes, um, hi, ratio! what’s up?”

ratio’s response shocks you. he asks, “i am having trouble with pulling the sides of my bowl up. would you mind showing me how to do it?”

what. ratio needs help – and your help at that? you quickly pull yourself together, though, because you’d rather not get berated by him.

“y-yeah, sure,” you acquiesce. “what are you trying to make?”

for the next hour or so, you guide ratio through the very few basics of pottery that you’ve become acquainted with. of course, ratio catches on very speedily, but contrary to your initial impression of him, he listens with rapt attentiveness and asks questions only when necessary. the final result is a round bowl with scalloped edges.

during your next visit to the studio, which is a week later, you run into ratio at the entrance. you both nod politely in recognition, remaining in silence as the studio manager helps the two of you set up. this time, ratio does not reach out to you. you notice that ratio creates another of the bowl he made (and you helped with) last week.

you don’t visit the studio again until a month later. midterms season plus additional shifts at the café because a coworker had quit without a two-week notice took up all of your time. yet, here ratio was again, already throwing as you settle at your station.

it’s weird, really. when and why did ratio pick up pottery? no one else on campus seemed to know – indicative by the lack of gossip regarding the genius –, and after a brief exchange with the studio staff that you’ve become familiar with, they thought he was simply a new frequenter.

you’re suddenly feeling courageous. maybe it’s because of the accumulated stress from the past month or the lack of caffeine, but regardless, you’re feeling bold enough to initiate conversation with ratio.

so you start easy, to seem casual. “hi, ratio,” you chirp, even adding in a small wave to appear extra friendly.

he glances up and nods before concentrating back on his work. you take that as your cue to get started as well.

after half an hour, from the corner of your eye, you see ratio pause his wheel and stretch, judging and evaluating the progress he’s made. you notice that he’s making something new, a wide plate with a shallow rim.

“nice work,” you offer.

“thank you,” he states.

you sigh. now, you’re just getting irritated. going about this in a roundabout way is clearly not working.

you set down your tools and stare right at ratio. “i’m curious,” you ask, “why pottery? i’ve never seen you here.”

“you’re not here often either.”

you groan internally. of course he’s focused on the trees instead of the forest. “i come often enough to know the other regulars, and you were definitely not one of them up until a month ago.”

ratio breaks away from his work and looks back at you. even though you’ve seen him in person a few times now, his eyes always manage to glimmer so beautifully that they steal your breath away. “is one not allowed to pick up a new hobby? or are your conceptions of a so-called ‘genius’ limited to that of a naturally gifted workaholic?”

you have to think for a moment before responding. ratio seems rather uncomfortable with the term “genius.”

you muse, “maybe. you’re the closest thing to being a genius that i know, and you seem to be winning awards all the time. that can’t be possible if you’re not working hard all the time. but… it’s good to know that pottery’s just a fun activity for you.”

he asks, “is it for you?”

“yeah, i think it is.” you smile, though it’s more for yourself. “look, i’m not particularly gifted at anything, not even at pottery. but that’s fine because you don’t have to turn your hobbies into work.”

“i don’t agree with you.” you tilt your head in confusion, slightly wary because you don’t want to debate or argue. ratio continues, “the notion of separating work from hobbies is clear, but claiming that you are not particularly gifted is unnecessary self-deprivation, no? i’ve seen your work from class, and it’s very obvious you have certain strengths.”

you roll your eyes and scoff. “that doesn’t mean i’m talented at anything. everyone has strengths, that’s true, but it’s not like i’m doing anything impressive enough to get on the front page of our university newspaper.”

ratio states your name, but it sounds more like a stern rebuke. “i don’t take pride in being called a genius.”

“why? because you didn’t get nominated last year?”

he corrects, “for the past few years.”

the genius society, the most prestigious nonprofit in the world, offers a scholarship program that selects and nurtures the brightest college students globally. despite all of the research and leadership ratio has contributed, he has never once been accepted, let alone waitlisted, for the program.

you think you have a better idea of the kind of person ratio is. maybe he’s more like the sun to your earth, more tender-hearted and relatable than you had assumed.

“make sure the clay is evenly distributed in the center of the plate,” you note. you know he doesn’t need empty words of sympathy or comfort.

“i will.”

the two of you work until you’re both done; he finishes his plate and you a medium-sized soup bowl because you had accidentally shattered the only one you had.

before you leave, though, ratio calls out to you. (you notice you like the way he says your name.)

he says, “please, call me veritas.”

you chuckle and nod. (he notices he likes the sound of your laugh.)

“i’ll see you soon, veritas.”

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futterurl · 11 months

Note

Hii do you do angsty smut? I’m craving angst & smut for Josh futturman . Love your first work here btw ❤️

tysm anon i fucking LOVE angst and smut mixed. literally two in one combo. i got u :b apologies if this wasnt what u were looking for!!

WARNINGS: angst, bleeding, pretty graphic, smut (mdni!), oral(f!receiving), p in v, creampie, afab reader

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you clutched your side, agony hitting every inch of your body. getting shot in your side wasn’t how you thought this mission was gonna go.

it was supposed to be simple: have everyone eat the Kronish balls, save the day, yada-yada. in and out. that wasn’t the case, however, when everyone who wasn’t borderline poisoned by the kronish balls turned out to be bionic.

josh wasn’t looking behind himself, not seeing a bionic creeping up to him at a quick pace with a knife in hand. you ran as fast as you could, trying to tell him to watch out.

you pushed josh out of the way, causing the bionic to stab you right in the side. the pain hit immediately, agonizing pain. you doubled over, wanting to remove the piece of steel. you knew this would only make it worse. you had to keep it in, at least until you were able to get somewhere safe.

“shit.” tiger panicked, seeing you on the ground, clutching your torso for dear life. you looked up at her with weak eyes, coughing up spurts of blood.

“gotta. got’ get help.” you tried to speak as hard as you could without exerting too much effort. she was able to pick you up and avoid the bionics, which wolf was going crazy with.

“guys! abort the mission. s’ in critical condition!” tiger yelled at josh and wolf, seeing their expressions drop as they saw her holding you, borderline limp in her arms. as they fended off the last of the bionics, they raced over to see you, crying and tired.

“fuck, fuck, this is my fault, fuck.” josh started talking at 100 miles an hour.

“this is nobody’s fault. someone get a goddamn car and bring us home.” wolf yelled. they all raced over to the car they took, tiger slamming on the gas the second you all piled in, josh now gently bringing you into the back.

“fuck, hurts s’ bad, fuck.” you grit through your teeth, hand bloody from holding onto your side. josh had propped you up against the car window. he kept his hand right on top of yours, whispering endless strands of “i’m sorry” and “this is my fault” through tears. this was the last thing he wanted to do, especially to the girl he loved, even if she didn’t know.

you were so selfless, you took a fucking knife to the torso for him. he owed you his fucking life, if you were okay after this, that is. he was gonna make sure you were okay. he clung onto your other hand and held onto it for dear life.

in just minutes, tiger was stopping the car in front of josh’s house. josh took you into his arms, racing up to his room, flat out ignoring his parents.

he laid you onto his bed, propping you up high with a good amount of pillows.

“i have a first aid kit in my bathroom. go get it. it’s in the cabinet.” he yelled at tiger and wolf. he couldn’t stay one second away from you. not like this.

wolf ran to get it, coming back in mere seconds. he had a wet rag. “we gotta take the knife out and put this over it immediately.” he panted.

“take my hand. this might hurt.” josh offered, holding out his hand to you, which you took into yours with ease.

“one, two, three”

tiger removed the knife, to which wolf covered you with the wet rag. you screamed and wailed as you crushed josh’s hand with yours. you had never experienced that amount of pain in your entire life.

“the worst is over. you did it.” tiger tried to ease your worries, offering you painkillers in the first aid kit wolf had brought.

“fuck. still hurts s’ fucking bad, fuck.” you silently cried. this felt like torture. you felt like you were going to puke.

“can you guys give us some privacy please? sorry, she’s overwhelmed and i know how to help her.” josh said, looking at tiger and wolf. “can you guys go talk to my parents? tell them we’re all good?”

they got the signal. they quickly left and shut the door behind them.

josh looked at you. “fuck, i’m so sorry. this is all my fault. i didn’t want you to get hurt like this, i’m so sorry…” he started to tear up.

you caressed his face. “it’s okay, josh. it wasn’t your fault, nothing you could’ve done. i’m still alive, aren’t i?”

“i know, but it shouldn’t be you with the fucking knife in your side.” he replied. he was really worried about you, his heart racing. he didn’t want you to be hurt. at all. he’d gladly take a knife for you for this to be overwith. for you to not be in any more pain.

“it’s okay, really. i jumped in.” you yawned, starting to get tired.

“okay, okay.” he wasn’t gonna argue with you anymore. “is there anything i can do for you?”

you squeezed his hand. “go to sleep with me for awhile?” you asked in a hushed tone.

nothing would’ve made him happier. he couldn’t be away from you, not now, not ever. he wanted to make sure that you’d be safe. with him. in his arms.

“of course. i..i’ll stay here with you. as long as you need.” he took a few pillows from under you, letting you lay down, he laying down next to you. you cuddled up to him a bit, making him blush. thank god the light was dimmed low.

“thank you…” you drifted off as you muttered those words. josh looked down at you, watching you fall into a deep sleep. he couldn’t keep his eyes off you. even after dying, you still looked so fucking perfect. how?

why would you take a knife for me? he asked himself, over and over. i hate seeing you like this.

the last thing he wanted to do was to see you in pain, and now he saw you in pure agony, on his behalf. he felt lime such a shitty person. the least he could do is lay with you.

he wouldn’t admit that was what he secretly wanted all along. he caressed your cheek before laying his head down, joining you in a peaceful slumber.

you spent the next couple days attached to josh like you two were conjoined at the hip. he was constantly there for your every need, whether that be for water, food, painkillers, anything.

you were healing up nicely. sure, you were still in pain, but it was significantly less than what it originally was. having josh by your side helped a lot.

you two were laying in his bed, when the painkillers sort of wore off. you winced.

“you okay?” he asked, concern in his voice.

“yeah, just hurts a bit.” you responded.

“you need anything? i can get it.” he offered.

“no, josh, really, it’s fine.” josh had been there for you at your every need, you were starting to feel bad. it felt like he was being a servant for you.

“i don’t want you to be in pain though.” he looked lost in thought. it looked like he wanted to say something.

“is there something on your mind, josh?” you asked.

“uh..uh, kind of. you ever have something on your mind but you don’t wanna say it because you don’t know if it’ll ruin something but you really don’t know what reaction you’ll get-” he started to talk faster and faster as he talked more and more.

“josh, we’ve known each other for what, how many years? we’ve talked about anything and everything. you can talk to me.” you propped yourself up to look at him.

he looked nervous. well, he always looked nervous. this time, however, he looked super nervous. something was on his mind.

"i was just gonna say, um, that, uh, i know a way to make you feel better...but, uh, it's kinda weird...yeah." he started stammering over his words.

"what is it, josh?" you asked. did he just bite his lip?

"i...i could make you...y'know..." he looked from your face down to your body, back up to you.

"make me what?" your heart started beating ever so slightly faster. might he be alluding to...?

"i...i could make you...make you cum. i know it's not a painkiller or anything, but it might take your mind off stuff. it's stupid, i..i should stop talking now. i shouldn't have said that. it's stupid. i'm sorry-"

you cut him off by putting your hand gently under his jaw and kissing him passionately. you started to grasp at his hair, holding it in fistfulls.

once your lips disconnected, you started breathing heavily. "josh, i'd love that. please. really." you never thought he'd ever ask you to do anything like this.

"really? am i dreaming?" he asked, rubbing your forearm gently.

"no. please, josh. make me feel good." you pleaded. now that the idea was out there, you were dead set on this. you didn't want anyone but him.

he got on top of you, starting to kiss your lips, your cheeks, your jawline, your neck. everything. it felt perfect. you could already feel your focus on your pain being subsided to this.

he lowered himself, settling in between your thighs, rubbing your hips. he held the ends of your shirt.

"can...can i see how it's doing first? just to check? don't wanna make it worse." he played with the hem of your shirt.

"yeah, yes. do it." you responded.

he lifted up your shirt to your ribcages, examining your bandages. it still looked pretty nasty, but it had certainly healed a lot since a few days ago.

"fuck...i'm still so, so sorry. i really am." he started to get a bit teary eyed while tenderly rubbing the skin by your bandages, careful to not get too close to where it would hurt.

"josh, really, it's okay. it happens. please. i don't want you to feel bad about this. it really is okay." you scratched at his hair.

"okay, okay...m'sorry. lemme make it up to you." he pressed a kiss to your stomach as he unzipped your shorts. he pulled them down slowly, not wanting to make your body jolt or be in any more pain that it was already in. he lost his breath, looking at you in just your shirt and panties. he still couldn't believe it.

"you...you okay?" you asked.

"y-yeah. i'm great. just...can't believe this is happening. you're so beautiful." he lay his head on one of your thighs, giving it a light kiss. that made you shudder. you didn't realize your thighs were that sensitive.

"thank you, thank you..." you started to mumble, becoming a bit nervous.

josh sensed your nerves. "you know, you don't have to let me do this, if you don't want me to. i know it's very up and personal."

"no, i really do, it's just...i'm just...nervous, is all. just...go slow please." you asked.

he played with the hems of your panties. "don't worry, i'll go as slow as you need." he pressed a kiss to your hip bones. "would you...would you mind if i took these off?"

"please. take them off." you were starting to get desperate.

he slowly eased them down your legs, getting a glimpse of your glistening pussy. he felt his eyes widen.

"can i...can i make you feel good?" he asked, pressing a kiss on your pubic bone.

"please, josh. want you to make me feel good so badly." you were practically begging at this point.

he lowered his head just a bit, propping himself truly inbetween your thighs, licking a stripe up your slit. you shuddered, new to the sensation. it felt weird, but in a good way.

"that feel okay?" he asked.

"yes, josh, for the love of god, please...more." you begged.

his tongue rested on your clit, rubbing it with the wet muscle. this sent shivers down your spine. it rubbed back and forth on the tiny area. you let out a moan, back starting to arch off the bed.

"shit...feels s'good josh, oh my god." you moaned, him drinking up your moans.

his lips attached themselves around your clit and just sucked. this sent all sorts of waves of pleasure through you. you pulled at his hair as he sucked at your clit. he ran his tongue in circles around the sensitive bud. had he ever done this before?

his tongue ran down your cunt, entering your tight hole with a moan from you. his thumb snuck up to your clit, not giving it a break as he rubbed tight circles around it.

"feels t' good, holy shit..." you were becoming putty in his hands as he tongue fucked you.

"you taste s' fucking good." he moaned into your pussy as his thumb became even faster around your clit, using your slick as lube. "love every part of you, fuck."

it didn't help that he was practically groaning into your cunt as he went down on you, letting out little whimpers and moans into you.

he heard you start to get louder and louder. he knew you were getting close to your release. his head went back up to your clit, giving it even more stimulation.

"josh...so close, oh my god..." your hips were starting to slightly buck up into his mouth.

"i know, pretty girl, not gonna stop until you cum down my fucking throat." he pleaded, urging you as he sopped at your clit, constantly hitting the bundle of nerves. your thighs got tighter around his head.

"i...oh my god...i think i'm gonna..." you started to pant hard, getting lost in the pleasure.

"c'mon. let it out. cum in my mouth. please. make me happy and cum on me. wanna make you feel so fucking good." he said in between licks.

one of them in particular make the tight band forming in your stomach snap, you finally getting that sweet, sweet release as you moan incoherent babbles to josh, as his tongue slowly eased at your cunt.

once you came down from your high, he started to rub little circles around your hips again. "you okay?" he asked.

"fuck...that was really fucking good, josh. oh my god." you panted as he peppered your stomach in kisses.

"good, m' glad." he rubbed the skin close to your bandage. "did i do anything to make it hurt any more?" he asked, worry etching on his eyebrows.

"no, it's all fine...i feel really good right now." you looked down at him, his face a mess of saliva and your slick. that was hot.

"good." he came up a little bit, you getting a peak at his erection standing through his pants.

"do you...do you want me to take care of that?" you asked, alluding to something more.

he caught his breath. "uh..are-are you sure? i know you just...y'know. you sure you want to?"

"please, josh. i want you to fuck me." you had never felt so desperate than you did right now. you needed him.

"i don't know if this is gonna hurt you. if it does, tell me and we're done." he said, getting out of his pants, his erection standing up in his boxers. your eyes widened. you couldn't believe he was going to be inside you.

"thank you josh, i will." you pulled him in to a kiss, your hand traveling down to his boxers, lightly gripping at his clothed cock. he let out a whimper.

"that feel good?" you asked.

"yes, fuck yes that felt good. but this is about you, not me. gonna make you feel good again. promise." he pulled away as he swiped down his boxers, freeing his girthy erection.

he positioned himself, sitting up on his knees, pulling one of your legs over his shoulder, alligning his cock with your dripping cunt. he ran his tip over your clit, you both shuddering.

"i..i'm gonna put it in now, okay?" he asked for permission, hands gently holding onto your hips, careful not to hurt you with the pressure. "i'll go slow, i promise."

"please." you whimpered.

he pressed it at your entrance, his tip slowly going inside you. he let out a shudder as he traced his thumbs back and forth on your thighs, trying to ease your nerves.

"fuck, oh my god. only have the tip in but it feels s' fucking good. you're so tight. fuck." he started to become a whimpering mess.

he slowly pushed his hips forward, entering you even more, at such a slow pace to make sure you weren't in any pain. sure, you had done this before, you told him, but it had been some time since. the last thing he wanted to do was make you hurt down there too.

"put the rest in josh, please." you whimpered.

he obliged, slowly bottoming out. all the sensations hit him at once: your tight, sopping cunt squeezing his cock. he knew he wouldn't last long.

"god, you're so tight, holy shit, feels so fucking good." he wailed, praising you as he caressed your hips. "you good?"

you nodded. you felt so full, it felt amazing. he looked at you with care and concern, like you were the only person in the world right then. it was perfect. he was doing all this for you.

"please start moving. feels good." you pleaded.

he nodded furiously, taking an experimental thrust into you, to which you both moaned out to. he was constantly letting out strings of "oh god" and "fuck" into the room as he started to grip your thigh.

he started to get into a motion, him pistoning in and out of you at a quick pace. your tight gummy walls pulled him in with every thrust, his cock hitting every sensitive spot inside you with every thrust.

"oh my god, you feel so good. love this pussy so much, holy shit." he was practically worshipping you at this point as his hips drove into yours, you letting out moans in response.

one of his hands found itself at your cunt, his thumb starting to bully your clit in tight circles, you letting out a loud moan in response.

"josh, getting close, oh my god. fuck!" you pleaded for him. his thumb around your clit started to move even faster as his hips drove into you, hitting every spot.

"gonna cum soon, please cum with me." he pleaded in between moans, hips moving even faster. you broke down into a moaning mess as you felt another orgasm coming.

"you're so hot, holy shit. wanna fuck you like this forever. wanna get lost in this pussy. please. want you to come on my cock over and over again. shit." he let out rambles as he started to reach his peak.

these words let you to your second orgasm, your cunt becoming even tighter around his cock as you moaned as loud as possible, yelling his name. your cunt squeezing him made him come undone, cumming inside you.

he kept thrusting into you, riding out both of your highs, until you came down. he put your leg down, him slowly pulling out and laying down on you, being careful to not lay down on your bandage.

"that...that felt so good josh, oh my god." you started to play with his hair and rubbing his back.

"good. m' glad. i really wanted to make you feel good." his head lay on one of your breasts, paying attention to your breathing pattern.

"you..you really helped. i feel really good right now. thank you." you squeezed him into a hug.

he put one of his arms around you, enjoying the warmth of your body. "i'll always be here for you, i owe it to you. i'll stick bt your side, no matter what.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

a/n: womp womp sry if that was kinda mid (im a loser if u couldnt tell)

#future man #future man smut #josh futturman x reader #josh futturman smut #josh futturman

247 notes · View notes

shuastruck · 7 months

Text

SIMP NOTES

ten. 07 !!! operation honeyboo: step 1 (cont.)

previous || masterlist || next

PAIRING || lee chan x female reader

GENRES || fluff, strangers to lovers, college au, humour, love triangle, angst

SUMMARY || lee chan, college's critically acclaimed and certified (read: self-proclaimed) cupid was a hundred percent sure that his guide to love manual aka the simp notes worked just perfectly fine, seeing the number of campus couples he had managed to get together. until you came up with your complex romantic problem and chan finds his trustworthy notes betraying him, especially when he begins to fall for you.

or, in which, chan never thought he would be following his own simp notes to win over you.

WARNINGS || a sexual innuendo

A/N || one day late...but hey i'm getting better at maintaining the schedule TT how was your guys valentine's day 😏? [i spent it with mr. matrices btw]

if you want to be added to the taglist, send me an ask!

A/N: Please do tell me what you think about this story!! I worked really hard on it and I would love to know everyone’s thoughts on it~ Comments and reblogs are appreciated!

#simp notes.#seventeen x reader #lee chan x reader #chan x reader #dino x reader #seventeen fake texts #seventeen smau #seventeen fluff #seventeen angst #chan fluff #chan angst #lee chan fluff #lee chan angst #dino fluff #dino angst

137 notes · View notes

goldfades · 9 months

Note

❄️ Jack Hughes ”no matter where I go, all these roads lead me to what I once called a home”

Congrats btw! 😁

✮ 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐠𝐨 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭, 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭, 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞 / 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐢𝐦 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭, 𝐠𝐨 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬 𝐦𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬 | jack hughes

♡ ─ word count | 4.4k

♡ ─ summary | jack, driven by his ambitions, realizes too late that he has taken his relationship with you for granted. as he achieves success, the bitterness of his lonely successes intensifies, highlighting the irreplaceable hole left by the genuine connection he lost.

♡ ─ warnings | unedited, angst!!! fighting, nothing else i think??

♡ ─ taglist | @dancerbailey3 @valluvsu @daisysnhl @dasiysthings @iminlovewithtz11 @literatureluster @lvrzegras @lxvleyzoe

♡ ─ ev's notes | this ask was a part of my 600 celly BUT i was feeling angsty so i wrote it. hope y'all enjoyed!! also, requests are open for now! always open to respectful criticisms :)

As the clock struck midnight on your fourth anniversary, you sensed a subtle shift in the air, a quiet shake that seemed to resonate within the core of your relationship with Jack. The two of you had been inseparable since your teenage years, navigating the trials of adolescence and embracing the joys of young love. Yet, as the months passed, a distance began to emerge, casting shadows over the once close connection you shared.

You noticed it first in the subtle changes – the diminishing frequency of his texts, the laughter less genuine, and the gradual shift in focus from your shared world to individual pursuits. The I-love-yous that used to flow effortlessly now hung in the air, unanswered or replaced by a strained silence.

You found yourself grappling with a growing sense of unease, a gnawing suspicion that whispered of changes you were not prepared to face. The shared dreams and aspirations that once bound you together now seemed to drift into the background, overshadowed by Jack's newfound focus on career ambitions and personal goals.

You weren't angry that Jack put his career first, no, if anything you'd pushed him to make sure his dreams were achieved. It was the fact that somehow, everything else became more important than your relationship. Making money and going out seemed like the only thing that mattered; everything that you two had talked about when you were younger had became less and less important to him. Was it a lie? They couldn't have been, he promised.

In quiet moments of reflection, you found yourself remembering the vows exchanged during late-night conversations when the world felt like it belonged solely to the two of you. Jack's assurances that success wouldn't change him, that love would remain the foundation of your connection, echoed through your mind like a haunting song. Yet, as the days passed, those promises started to feel like distant echoes, fading away in his ambitions.

You had always envisioned a future where success and love walked hand in hand, where the pursuit of dreams strengthened the bond between you. But, it seemed that Jack's definition of success had turned into a solitary journey, one that left little room for the shared dreams you both had once held dear.

The weekends that were once reserved for lazy strolls in the park or movie nights now transformed into a whirlwind of social events, networking dinners, and late-night games. As Jack's career flourished, the time he dedicated to building a life together dwindled, leaving you grappling with a sense of isolation within the relationship.

You couldn't help but question whether the promises he made were now casualties of his success. Did the allure of wealth and a thriving social life overshadow the simplicity and authenticity of your love? The echoes of those once-heartfelt promises grew fainter, drowned out by the noise of his career and the allure of a lifestyle that seemed to prioritize everything but the intimacy and connection you once shared.

The nights you spent cuddled up on the couch, lost in conversations that stretched until dawn, became replaced by solitary moments of insecurity. You wondered if you had done something wrong, if there was a fault in your stars that you failed to recognize. Were you not enough? Were the dreams you shared no longer worth pursuing together?

The once deep connection that felt like an unbreakable bond now seemed like a fragile thread, ready to snap under the weight of unanswered questions. In those quiet moments, you found yourself replaying old conversations, searching for the missed cues or overlooked signs that may have forewarned you of this impending shift. Was there something you missed?

You longed for the days when love was enough, when the simplicity of being together was worth more than any fleeting moment of fame and success. The questions that lingered in your mind echoed in the silent spaces between you and Jack, becoming an unspoken barrier that seemed hopeless.

In those moments of doubt, you couldn't help but wonder if there was a way to bridge the growing gap, to reclaim the dreams that once felt so attainable. The beginning of the end hung in the air, and you found yourself at a crossroads, torn between holding onto the fading echoes of promises or facing the reality that the love you once knew was slipping away.

The clock on the wall ticked away the seconds, the sound echoing through the quiet living room as she sat on the couch, glancing anxiously at her watch. Hockey practice was supposed to end hours ago, but Jack was still out there on the rink, lost in his own world. The apartment felt empty, the only source of light was the soft glow of a lamp casting long shadows across the room.

You absentmindedly twirled a strand of your hair, glancing at the clock again. The frustration and exhaustion etched on your face were undeniable. The late-night practices had transformed from an occasional occurrence to a regular part of your lives, leaving your with a sense of loneliness that permeated the air.

The door creaked open, and Jack stumbled in, clad in his hockey gear, a tired look on his face. His gaze met yours, and for a moment, there was a flicker of guilt before it quickly masked itself with a tired smile.

"Hey," he said, his voice heavy with exhaustion. "Sorry, practice ran late again."

She forced a smile, but the weariness in her eyes spoke volumes. "It's fine," she replied, her tone carrying a weight of unspoken words. "I made some food, it's in the microwave if you want some."

"Already ate with the boys," he replied before he disappeared into the bathroom, you sank deeper into the cushions, grappling with the frustration of being left alone, night after night.

As the sound of the running shower echoed through the apartment, you sat there, feeling the weight of the unshared meal and the emptiness that seemed to seep into the spaces between you and Jack. The promise of a home-cooked dinner, prepared with love, now felt like a futile attempt to bridge the growing gap in your relationship.

When Jack emerged from the bathroom, the scent of soap and exhaustion lingered in the air. He joined you on the couch, the distance between you both more pronounced than ever.

He settled in, scrolling absentmindedly through his phone. The flickering light illuminated his tired face, the blue glow reflecting in his eyes that were once filled with the spark of shared dreams. You glanced at the clock; it was late, too late for meaningful conversation.

"Long day," he mumbled, his attention still on the screen.

You two sat in silence for a few moments before you decided to speak up again, another attempt to bridge the gap between you two.

"Jack," you began, the uncertainty in your voice cutting through the quiet of the room. He looked up from his phone, meeting your eyes with a distant acknowledgment.

"I was thinking about our future, you know?" The words hung in the air, a tentative attempt to navigate a conversation that felt more fragile than ever.

He sighed, the weariness evident in the lines that etched his face. "Yeah, me too. It's just... work's demanding right now. I'm on the brink of something big, and I need to give it my all."

The acknowledgment of his ambitions stung, a reminder that the dreams you once shared were now taking divergent paths. "I get that, Jack. I've always supported your goals, but it feels like we're moving in different directions lately. What about that family we'd always wanted, the two boys and the girl-"

"What about family, Y/N? We have time, We're 22 for God's sake, just be patient with me." Frustration dripped from his voice as he snapped, sighing as he watched all the patience drain from your face. He looked back at you, guilt overtaking his emotions. "I know it's been tough, especially with the late nights and practices. But this is temporary. Once I make it, we can have everything we ever talked about."

Everything you ever talked about. The phrase echoed in your mind, a stark contrast to the reality of unshared dinners, missed moments, and fading dreams. Did he even remember your dreams together anymore? "Jack, it's not just about the late nights. It's about us, about the life we planned together. I miss the simplicity of what we had."

He nodded, a reluctant admission of the truth. "I miss it too, but we need to make sacrifices for the life we want. This is just part of the journey."

You were tired as you looked forward, to the TV. "Okay, Jack." The conversation lingered in the air, unresolved and heavy.

The room fell into a heavy silence, the weight of unspoken words settling between you and Jack. The glow of the television cast shadows on the walls, a stark reminder of the distance that had grown within the space you once shared.

──

The restaurant hummed with the clinking of cutlery and the murmur of conversations. The atmosphere should have been celebratory after Jack's successful game, but as you sat across from him at a dimly lit table, there was an undeniable tension in the air.

Throughout the meal, Jack's attention seemed divided. He was engaged in animated discussions with teammates who joined the celebration, and you found yourself fading into the background. Attempting to bring a sense of intimacy, you reached for his hand, a silent plea for a connection in the midst of the crowd.

However, when one of his teammates approached the table to congratulate him, Jack subtly withdrew his hand to shake theirs. The gesture was small, but the impact reverberated through you like a shockwave.

As the teammate left, you couldn't ignore the awkwardness that settled between you and Jack. The distance had become palpable, and the celebratory atmosphere of the restaurant only accentuated the loneliness you felt.

The walk back to the car was quiet and dormant, you felt almost nauseous after. The silence between you and Jack was broken only by the distant sounds of the city. You stole glances at him, hoping to find a trace of the connection you once shared. However, his gaze seemed distant, lost in thoughts that remained unspoken.

As you approached the car, the silence became unbearable. The unlocking of the car door punctuated the stillness, and you both settled into the seats, the physical proximity doing little to bridge the emotional chasm that had formed.

The car hummed softly as you drove back from Jack's hockey game. You stole glances at Jack, his profile bathed in the soft glow of passing streetlights. His eyes remained fixed on the road ahead, distant and unyielding. The connection you once shared, the easy banter and shared laughter, felt like a distant memory. The gap had widened, and you couldn't shake the sinking feeling that something big had shifted.

"I just don't understand, Jack," you finally broke the silence, the words hesitant but charged with emotion.

He sighed, his gaze still fixed on the road. "Understand what, Y/N?"

Your name sounded bitter coming from his mouth, hearing it felt like a curse. Your name used to sound sweet, like something special - now, it sounded like something else.

"I don't understand why it feels like we're falling apart," you admitted, the weight of the unspoken tension finding a voice. "I don't understand why every moment between us seems strained, like we're living in two different worlds. It doesn't feel like us anymore."

Jack's shoulders tensed, his grip on the steering wheel tightening. The city lights cast shadows on his face, emphasizing the lines that etched the weariness of unresolved issues.

"We're just going through a rough patch," he replied, his voice carrying an edge and it almost sounded like he was trying to convince himself that, too.

"But how long is this 'rough patch' going to last, Jack?" The bitterness crept into your voice, fueled by the frustration of being kept in the dark. "I feel like I'm losing you, and I don't even know why."

He remained silent, the distance between you growing with each passing second. Your hands fidgeted in your lap, the tension in the car becoming unbearable. "We used to talk about everything, Jack. Now it feels like you're shutting me out."

He finally turned to look at you, his eyes carrying a mixture of guilt and defensiveness. "I'm dealing with a lot right now, Y/N. It's not about shutting you out."

"But it feels that way," you countered, the rawness of your emotions laid bare. "I want to be there for you, but I can't if you don't let me in."

His knuckles tightened on the steering wheel, and frustration etched lines on his forehead. "You just don't get it, do you? This is my career, my life. I'm trying to make something of myself, and you're making it harder."

The words hung in the air, a declaration that cut through the silence like a sharp blade. The breaking point was reached, and a surge of anger replaced the hurt in your chest.

"Making it harder? Jack, I'm not your enemy. I'm your partner," you retorted, your voice rising. "I've supported you every step of the way, I've put you first for the last three years, Jack, I pushed everything aside to come move to Jersey with you."

"I never asked you to do that, Y/N." Jack replied, his frustration palpable.

"That's not the point!" you shot back, your emotions breaking through the dam of restraint. You couldn't believe that was the only thing he got from everything you'd just said. "I did it because I believed in us. I believed in you. But now it feels like you're pushing me away, shutting me out, and I can't take it anymore."

"You're not understanding, Y/N," Jack's tone grew sharper, defensive walls rising. "I'm under so much pressure, and I need space. I can't have you constantly questioning me, doubting everything I do."

His words cut deep, and you felt a sense of betrayal mingled with the anger. "I'm not doubting you, Jack. I'm doubting us. I'm doubting whether we can survive if you keep shutting me out like this."

He turned away, gripping the steering wheel tightly. "I want a future, Y/N. I want success. Is that so wrong?"

"It's not wrong, Jack, but success shouldn't come at the cost of our relationship," you argued, desperation seeping into your voice. "I want a future too, but not at the expense of us falling apart."

He scoffed, the bitterness in his tone cutting through. "You knew what you signed up for when we started this relationship. I can't just drop everything now."

"Jack, relationships require effort from both sides," you insisted, your frustration reaching its peak. "You're so focused on your career that you're neglecting what's right in front of you."

"I'm neglecting what's right in front of me? Y/N, I'm working hard for us," he argued, the bitterness in his voice unabated. "I'm trying to build a future, a life where you don't have to worry about anything."

"But what about the life we're living now?" you pleaded, your voice breaking through the tension. "What about the love and connection we used to have? Is that not worth fighting for anymore?"

Silence lingered, the car speeding through the night, the city lights outside casting a surreal glow. The breaking point had led to a stark realization — you were both standing at a crossroads, and the choices made in this moment would shape the fate of your relationship.

"Jack, it's not just about the future. It's about us, about what we have now," you spoke softly, the vulnerability in your voice revealing the depth of your emotions. "I miss the way we used to be, the laughter, the shared dreams. It feels like we're losing all of that."

He remained silent, his grip on the steering wheel tight. As you neared home, the heaviness in the air grew more pronounced. The choices you both faced were stark — to continue down divergent paths, the breaking point had set the stage for a decision, and as the car rolled to a stop, the echoes of unmet needs and fading dreams reverberated in the silence that enveloped you both.

The engine cut off, and Jack finally turned to look at you. His eyes, once filled with love, now reflected the weight of the unspoken resentment. The air inside the car felt dense with the unmet expectations.

"Y/N," he began, his voice heavy. "I think we need to be honest with ourselves. We're not the same people we were when we started this journey. Our dreams, they've pulled us in different directions."

The breaking point had reached its culmination, and the truth hung in the air like a heavy fog. You looked at Jack, the person you had shared so much love with, and saw a stranger in the dim glow of the car's interior staring back at you.

"I never wanted it to come to this," he continued, a hint of regret in his eyes. "But we can't keep holding onto what used to be. It's not fair to either of us."

Tears welled up in your eyes as you nodded, the pain of parting etched on both your faces. The car door opened, and as you stepped out into the cool night air, the echoes of what once was lingered in the spaces between you. The breaking point had led to an ending, a decision made in the quiet aftermath of a car ride that had shifted the course of your relationship.

──

Months had passed since the break up, and Jack found himself navigating the post-Y/N world with attempts to move on. Tonight, he found himself at a bar with his friends, the dimmed lights and lively atmosphere attempting to drown the lingering echoes of Y/N and everything she was.

His friends, aware of his struggle, were determined to lift his spirits. "Come on, Jack, look around. There are plenty of beautiful girls here! Who wouldn't wanna sleep with the Jack Hughes?" One of them encouraged, gesturing towards the crowd.

Jack halfheartedly smiled, appreciating their efforts to pull him out of his slump. He scanned the room, the laughter and chatter of the bar patrons surrounding him. Amidst the sea of faces, one caught his eye — a girl who, from a distance, bore a resemblance to Y/N.

His friends nudged him, teasingly urging him to approach her. "There you go, Jack! She's cute, right?"

He hesitated, his gaze fixed on the girl who seemed to share a fleeting resemblance to someone he once held close, someone who had been his world. The internal struggle between moving on and clinging to the past played out in his conflicted expression.

But as he approached, the girl looked up, and for a moment, Jack's heart skipped a beat. The resemblance was uncanny — the same captivating eyes, a similar smile. In that instant, he felt a pang of nostalgia, a cruel reminder of what he had lost.

The girl, oblivious to the emotional turmoil within Jack, smiled politely. Jack stammered, the weight of the past and the allure of familiarity colliding. His friends exchanged knowing glances, realizing that even in a sea of faces, some connections were indelible. As Jack struggled to respond, his gaze lingered on the girl who momentarily embodied a resemblance to the one he couldn't forget.

"Hey, can I get you something to drink?" Jack said, feigning confidence.

"Sure, I'll have a vodka soda."

As he headed to the bar, Jack's friends continued their subtle exchange of knowing glances. They could see the conflict in their friend's eyes, torn between the past and the present.

As he returned with the drinks, Jack decided to engage in conversation, attempting to momentarily escape the weight of his thoughts. They found a more secluded spot, away from the lively crowd, and Jack tried to muster a genuine smile.

"Cheers," he said, lifting his glass. The clink of glasses filled the air, but in the echo.

As they teased back and forth, Jack decided to flirt, something he'd done a million times in the last couple of months, trying to move on. The girl reciprocated, and for a brief moment, the bar seemed like a place where past and present could coexist.

"You know," she said, casually swirling the drink in her hand, "I've never met someone as driven as you, someone so focused on their own success. It's impressive, but I wonder if you've ever stopped to enjoy the simpler things in life. I bet it's hard, with your work and stuff..."

Jack's smile faltered, and his eyes widened in surprise. Her words hung in the air, and for a moment, Jack was transported back to the countless times Y/N had gently urged him to appreciate the present and to find joy in the little things.

In that instant, the weight of realization hit him. It wasn't about a specific detail, but rather the essence of what he had lost. Y/N had brought balance to his life, grounding him in the beauty of everyday moments. The girl's words echoed Y/N's sentiments, and it dawned on Jack how much he had taken her for granted.

Excusing himself, Jack left the girl confused. He quickly said his goodbyes to his friends, walking back to his friends. The attempt to recreate the banter, the flirtation – it all felt like a hollow pursuit compared to the real connection he had with Y/N.

Outside the bar, the cool night air wrapped around him, and Jack took a moment to collect his thoughts. The city lights flickered in the distance, a stark contrast to the clarity that was slowly settling within him. Determined to address the growing void within him, Jack made his way back to the apartment he once shared with Y/N. The familiar surroundings seemed different now, carrying the echoes of both joy and the regret of what he had lost.

Upon entering, the silence enveloped him, a stark contrast to the happy memories that used to fill these walls. The photographs on the wall, the shared belongings, all gone now. The home now felt sterile and cold, it didn't feel like home anymore.

Jack sank onto the couch, his mind replaying the moments he had shared with Y/N. The laughter, the late-night talks, the dreams they had woven together – they all flooded back, bringing with them a profound longing.

Unable to shake the weight of regret, Jack decided to confront the reality he had been avoiding. He picked up his phone and dialed Y/N's number, the familiar digits carrying the hope of rebuilding what he had carelessly let crumble.

"Hey, it's me," Jack began, the words carrying a vulnerability he had long suppressed. "I've been doing a lot of thinking, and I need to talk to you. Can we meet?"

Y/N's response was a mixture of surprise and caution, "Jack, it's been months. What's there to talk about now?"

Jack took a deep breath, ready to lay bare his feelings. "I realized how much I took you for granted, Y/N. The success, the pursuit of my dreams – they meant nothing without you. I miss us, I miss the simplicity and authenticity we had. Can we meet, please?"

Y/N's hesitant silence on the other end spoke volumes, and Jack felt his heart sink. After what seemed like an eternity, she finally responded with a gentle but firm, "Jack, I appreciate your honesty, but I've moved on. Meeting now wouldn't change anything."

His chest tightened with the weight of her words, and the reality of the consequences hit him. Jack had taken a chance on something genuine and beautiful and let it slip away. The simplicity and authenticity he once shared with Y/N were now fragments of a past he couldn't reclaim.

"I understand," he said, his voice betraying a sense of defeat. "I just wanted you to know how sorry I am, and that I've learned from my mistakes."

Y/N's response was soft, "Jack, take this as a lesson for your future. I hope you find the happiness you're searching for."

The call ended, leaving Jack with a hollow ache. The apartment, once filled with shared dreams, now felt emptier than ever. The essence of what he had lost lingered in the air, a constant reminder of the genuine connection he had taken for granted.

Anger took over his body and he couldn't help but slam his hands on the coffee table, it felt like the whole apartment shook. Breathing heavily, Jack paced around the room, the weight of his realization settling in. The photographs on the wall seemed to mock him, frozen moments that he couldn't ever relive. The essence of what he could've had with Y/N now haunted him, a ghost of the love he had taken for granted.

He glanced around the apartment, each corner holding memories of shared laughter, whispered promises, and the warmth of their love. It was a stark contrast to the emptiness that surrounded him now.

Sinking onto the couch, Jack let out a heavy sigh. The world he could've had with Y/N played out in his mind like a bittersweet movie, each scene a reminder of what he had lost. Regret clawed at him, and Jack couldn't shake the image of Y/N moving forward without him. The authenticity he craved, the simplicity he missed – it was all embodied in the love he had taken for granted.

As Jack sat alone in the quiet apartment, the taste of success, once sweet on his tongue, now felt bitter. The achievements that he had relentlessly pursued seemed hollow without Y/N by his side to share in the joy.

The awards and accomplishments, once the pinnacle of his aspirations, now felt like mere tokens in a life that lacked the authenticity he had once shared with Y/N. The world he had built for himself seemed colorless without her to share in the colorful moments of success.

In the solitude of the apartment, Jack realized that the pursuit of success had come at a cost – the cost of a genuine, irreplaceable connection. The bitterness of this realization was palpable, a reminder that the sweetest victories were the ones shared with someone you loved. And no matter where he went, all those roads led him to what I once called his home, his everything.

It was a bitter truth that Jack couldn't escape, and as he reflected on the choices that had led him to this lonely moment, he understood that success, without the taste of shared happiness, was empty. In the silence, he grappled with the emptiness that accompanied the absence of the one person who had made every success worthwhile.

-> make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated! <-

thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡

#nhl imagine #nhl #nhl fic #hockey #nhl oneshot #nhl fanfiction #hockey fic #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes imagine #jack hughes smut #jack hughes blurb #jack hughes fic #jack hughes #jack hughes x y/n #nj devils #new jersey devils #hughes brothers

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nights-at-crystarium · 1 year

Text

You know what, I assume that people always read my pinned, or notice the pointer "new reader? start here" in every new Fragments' episode. I might be deluding myself. So hi hello lemme TALK ABOUT MY COMIC.

Before I get too rambly (and I mean RAMBLY), here's a quick intro. Fragments is a comic focused on feels and slice of life, made by a queer guy, aiming to ~character study~ the main cast (Vivi, Raha, Alisaie, Feo Ul) and fill in the gaps in canon (or linger in canon moments that needed more air imo), the tone ranging from angst to fluff to meme. Good punches require a good windup, so please don't expect angst anytime soon :3c

The story's segmented (fragmented, heh) into episodes. Episodes 1-11 take place in ARR, you can enjoy them with no worry about spoilers. Episode 12 onward is ShB, with all the spoilers and lorebending.

My storytelling style assumes you haven't only played through ShB, but know it like the back of your hand, i.e. it's for nerds and thinkers. Of course there's plenty of silly moments that don't require any deep knowledge, but the overarching story does. Often I skip canon events, only hinting that they took place, simply because I don't wanna retell the msq 1:1, I've got plenty of original scenes waiting to be drawn. You're in for a treat if you like obsessing over emotional and moral implications of things. And, yes, this's a story about a morally grey mc. Don't expect to be spoon-fed "and this's why that thing's bad, kids".

Currently I've outlined all the main story beats up until post EW, so it's like, not being winged as I go. Yes I refine things here and there, but I know where I'm going. I'm going ham!!!! With the lorebending post ShB. Initially I didn't plan to, but the more I learned about Vivi and personally grew as a writer, the more courage I got to "divorce" from canon. The general xiv story may still be good wherever it's headed, but it's not suited for an established wolgraha, so I'm making food for myself.

Everyone imagines the lil scenes from their wol's life, I'm taking that a tiiiiiny step further. Fragments tells a cohesive story that's looking to be the longest project at least in our corner. I can and will hyperfixate on this for years.

I started out just like many others, being hit with ShB like a truck, I wanted to put a catboy under a microscope and rotate him forever. Although I'd already been drawing for decades, I didn't have the comic-making skills yet, or eloquence to write the dialogue, so I spent the first half of 2022 self-studying, just because I needed a mouth to be able to scream about my ship.

Vivi didn't exist prior to my obsession with Exarch. He was made for this, he started out as a reagent (or a foil, now that I know fancy writing terms) for a rich and fun chemistry, and keep myself entertained for years, first and foremost.

Me, a fool: okay let's make a guy that falls in love with Exarch in this particular moment, what kinda life must he have led to- Me: ....oh no

The chemistry quickly bubbled up and exploded in my face, involving not only Exarch, but other characters (first as a means to subtly tell about Vivi, then they also demanded their own screentime), and here I am, sitting with a massive script on my hands, drawing my blorbos every day. Thanks for enabling that btw.

I care about characters a lot. I ask a lot of whys and hows. I'm critical-minded and burned on many bad stories that did their characters dirty, and I wanna be an opposing example. What I'm doing is extremely ambitious and risky, yes, but I can only invite you to tag along and see if I stick to my word.

The internet's a cruel and unforgiving place nowadays, and here I am, pitting my passion against what feels like decaying humanity. I'm making this comic to keep myself happy above all else, being sincere and cringe because life's too short to be anything else.

Thanks for reading this, and if you haven't yet, read Fragments here!

#ffxiv #vivien rell #crystal exarch #g'raha tia #wol x g'raha tia #wolgraha #own: next lvl #fragments talk

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iho6hi2 · 3 months

Text

Infrunami.

Type: Oneshot

Pairing: Matsuno Karamatsu/F! Reader

Summary: Getting kisses from a hot lady? Karamatsu would love that. Almost getting ran over by a hot lady? Not exactly on his bucket list, but Karamatsu checks it regardless.

Warnings: Near Death Experiences, Fluff, Attempt at Humor, Light Angst, Drinking, Getting to Know Each Other, Feel-Good, Ridiculous

Word Count: 8,037

A/N: MY HOMESLICE 🧀🧀 Karamatsu deserves someone he can be a flop with T__T BTW Im so insecure about this so pls either give me a 10 page essay on why this sucked or one 'this was cool Lol' otherwise ill kms

Karamatsu ambles near the bridge, his usual hotspot for courting women in this cruel game life likes to call love; or more accurately the place where he stands still like a traffic sign with the hopes of someone giving him the time of day for once (huge spoiler alert: nobody does, as expected).

He chuckles, feigning smug amusement as he runs a hand through his hair in one smooth motion. "The stars must not favor me today, for all of my Karamatsu girls are nowhere to be seen. Heh, if that is the fate of a sinful man, I shall accept it and retreat with peace.''

The looks passersby shoot him border on mentally perturbed and downright horrified, because who the hell monologues atrocities like these out loud? Without being under the influence of something, nonetheless.

With that declaration out of the way, Karamatsu straightens up and decides to head home for the day, deeming it appropriate. What with his love endeavors turning out to be unsuccessful once again, also to no one's big surprise really.

On his way home, whenever the opportunity presents itself, he stops to window-shop every time he passes by a fashion boutique and admires clothes his broke bum probably couldn't afford.

Of course, he attempts not to appear interested, and instead only crosses his arms critically and gives the mannequins clad in clothing the stink eye (even if he's wearing shades of all things) while the workers glance at him warily through the window.

Before another demented sentence is said, suddenly all chaos breaks loose and there are people yelling and instantly he's all too aware of the motorcycle nearing him with each passing second. Karamatsu shrieks so loud he's sure everyone from the next town over had heard him.

"Get out of the way!" The biker shouts and waves a hand to the side for emphasis, and he feels like a fly being swatted away, but even if Karamatsu wanted to move it's almost as if his legs are rooted to the ground.

A wave of panic washes over him and strangely enough there was still enough time for dread to settle in the depths of his stomach. Even if it may be cliché, his life does end up flashing before his eyes － and it's just plain sad how fucking boring it is.

"Get out of the way," you repeat, though you sound more adamant, your tone coated with a sense of urgency.

Ahhh, Mommy! I'll die a virgin, I'll die a loser! Karamatsu cries in his mind. If I survive, I'll get a job, I swear! I'll even stop talking in English, just please! He pleads mentally, to whom is unknown.

Suddenly, you remember that brakes exist and you swerve with such mastery you weren't even aware you possessed up until now, coming to an abrupt stop right in front of your spared victim, tires screeching harshly against the pavement. Karamatsu deadpans, God had a real sense of humor.

He's still frozen in place, barely containing the natural instinct to piss himself. Though he's also pretty sure the urge to urinate will hit him like a shit ton of bricks post-shock.

Fortunately, he's not Ichimatsu and so he doesn't shit himself in front of the cute girl getting off of the motorcycle, even if she barely missed out on becoming his murderer.

You approach him cautiously, expecting the berating of a lifetime. Though judging by his state － him shaking like a leaf despite his thick leather jacket, also not to mention the buckets worth of sweat rolling off him －, you doubt you'll get an earful.

"Are you okay?'' Obviously, he's not. ''You're not hurt or anything, right?''

Karamatsu shakes his head timidly despite not even listening to a word you said. Then, he gulps and raises a trembling hand to his face, lowering his sunglasses just a smidge to take a good peek at you. ''H-Heh, you have, um, nothing to worry about my dear Karamatsu girl..."

You do your best to smile at him in response, but the need to physically recoil is understandably strong. ''Oh, uh, that's good to hear. I'm sorry for, you know, almost killing you and giving you a fright... It happens a lot for some reason.''

You need to get your license revoked, Karamatsu's eye twitches but he smirks regardless, willing to disregard everything that had occurred just because you were one hot lady. Plus, he is a gentleman, if nothing else.

''As if! You have no reason to fret, mon amour. The thrill of living or dying, chasing that high is what makes or breaks a man! Such a thing couldn't possibly scare me."

''Are you sure? 'Cause I'm certain I heard you scream,'' you grin with more teeth than you should. It'd be such a pleasure to knock him down a couple of notches, you think.

''T-T-That was most definitely not a scream, my darling, I assure you! It was but a noise of excitement at the divine gamble, ahahaha, that's all!'' Karamatsu stutters, stumbling over his words.

You blink, positively unimpressed. "You were excited to get ran over?"

After that, an uncomfortable silence stretches between the two of you. You're pulled into reality by the fact that just about anyone could see your number plate, so it was time to leave and flee the supposed crime scene. You're not getting fined for this, hell no. If anything, you're the one who's in desperate need of reparations after this degenerate conversation.

You mount your motorcycle again and look at him with an almost impish smile, ''You have weird tastes, man." And with that last comment, you're gone in the same breath, leaving behind only a cartoonish dust cloud.

Karamatsu's legs give out and he collapses, falling to his knees. Nobody helps him up.

★

Karamatsu doesn't really visit clubs often. Going by himself makes him feel strangely out of place, going with his brothers makes him feel like a circus attraction, though it's not like it has ever bothered him before.

He would usually lie through his teeth and strive to come off as unbothered and remarkably experienced; a well-seasoned veteran among premature ejaculators, but crowded places like these aren't his scene, at all. Never really have been in the first place.

Perhaps that's why he thinks he doesn't belong here as he observes the rest of the partygoers live it up on the dancefloor while babysitting his beer, one sip at a time.

The music isn't even good, Karamatsu frowns and pinches his eyebrows together, deep in thought. Man, did this place fucking suck. How much did they have to cough up in order for others to rate it a 4-star club?

Well, he supposes it doesn't really matter in the end. As long as the booze's good, that's all he needs to forget this horrible day. A 'nice' hangover is all it takes to wipe his memories clean, which isn't much to brag about.

''Oh, it's you!'' Someone exclaims and he whips his head forward before spitting out his alcohol. What are the odds? You point at him, just as shocked as him at this turn of events, ''Mr. Painful!''

Karamatsu chuckles, raising his glass full of beer as a greeting. ''Madame. Charmed to see you here.''

You roll your eyes but that doesn't hinder you from grinning back at him, ''Oh, the pleasure is all mine, trust me.''

''I would hope so. What are the chances of our paths crossing once more? It leads me to believe that this is no chance encounter. Hmph, why it must be fate.'' Karamatsu blabbers on, implementing wild gestures into his dialogue, takes his sunglasses off and his eyes shine with what you presume is a romantic glint.

You cough a little and wipe the bar clean with a towel, ''Yeah, no. I just work here.''

''The universe works in mysterious ways.''

You laugh. ''Whatever helps you sleep at night, buddy.'' Then, you pat the back of his hand twice. You watch him jump up in surprise and tilt your head to the side, confused.

Karamatsu clutches his hand to his chest, but realizes how fucking ridiculous he must look and simply clears his throat with that same proud expression.

You squint your eyes. ''You're not sick, are you?''

Karamatsu hurries to shake his head, which did nothing but give him a sense of déjà vu. ''N-Non, non! Don't worry your pretty little head over my health, angel. I'm nothing else if not alright, haha.''

You narrow your eyes at him further.

His hands are bundled over his crotch and he has one leg crossed over the other and if Twitter had taught you anything useful at all, it would mean that these are early signs of cock shame. And all of his prior mannerisms, could it be that he is... ''A virgin?''

You did not mean to say that out loud.

Karamatsu's face turns blank for a brief second before he's flapping his hands left and right in firm denial. His face is flushed, panicked, and you swear he's on the brink of tears.

When you said that you wanted to knock him off his high horse, this wasn't what you had in mind, at least not exactly. As a matter of fact, you feel sort of bad for the poor guy.

''Hahaha... What are you talking about, my Karamatsu girl? You should be able to tell by now that a man like me is sought after, which is one of the many punishments I must endure!'' He announces, posing with his index and thumb on his chin, a shaky smile slapped on his sweaty face.

You blink, then prop your elbows on the front bar, lean in and ask, ''And in reality?''

Karamatsu sits back down in his stool, then promptly downs the rest of his beer. ''A jobless virgin who lives in his parents' house.''

You register the somber look in his eyes. You sigh under your breath and open up the fridge, pulling out the same brand of beer he had been drinking until now and pass the bottle to him casually.

Karamatsu looks up at you in disbelief, glancing between you and the bottle of beer frantically. You flick his forehead, ''Drink up, it's on the house just this once.''

Karamatsu stiffens and then smiles gently, rubbing his wet eyes with the sleeve of his jacket, snivelling. ''Thank you, my Karamatsu girl!''

You cross your arms and huff, ''It's [Name]. And besides, I almost ran you over earlier today, it's the least I can do for you.''

''Thank you, [Name].'' Karamatsu parrots himself and happily takes a swig of his new, freshly refilled drink.

You watch him out of the corner of your eye while serving other customers. When a majority of the people disperse, leaving the two of you mostly alone again, you quickly scribble down your number on a napkin.

''Here,'' you call out to him as you hand him the piece of paper. When he shoots you a curious look, you redirect your attention elsewhere in mock embarrassment. ''You seem like fun, let's drink together for realsies next time. My treat.''

Karamatsu gasps, screaming like a banshee with a voice mutation and you think he emotes a strange, outdated gag while leaping ten feet in the air.

His head hits the ceiling but he comes back down just as quick, blood dripping down his face. Planks come crashing down on top of him, somehow on fire, and you clench your jaw. This will definitely be deducted from your paycheck.

★

Karamatsu wakes up, but he doesn't remember how or when he got home.

He ruffles his hair, only to find his broken shades and several bandages wrapped around his head. He attempts to jog his memory and yet the only thing he's able to recall is slamming face-first into a roof and... And...

He sits up and Olympic dives straight into the couch, barbarically searching for that blessed piece of paper which could very well change the entire trajectory of his life.

When he pulls it out of his leather jacket's pocket, he breathes heavily and fakes a falsetto, opting to roll around on the floor in some sort of wild frenzy.

This is it. I'm finally presented with an opportunity to abandon my virgin ways, Karamatsu thinks with a serious expression, shadows covering his eyes dramatically.

He raises a lone victorious fist in the air, cutting through the Matrix itself. Then, Karamatsu gulps and surveys the area, noticing that the living room is empty, which can only mean one thing. Now is the perfect time to plan a romantic rendezvous with you.

Tip-toeing his way to the hall where the landline is located, Karamatsu muttered curse words whenever the floorboards creaked under his weight.

When he reaches the house phone, he gently unfolds the napkin and smoothes out the wrinkles, then sucks in a deep breath and forces his balls to turn into pure steel.

Dialing your number with practiced caution, he bites his nails and anxiously taps his foot. The longer he waits for you to pick up, the more he loses hope.

Just as he was about to hang up and snap back to his miserable reality, maybe cry for an hour or two, your voice croaks out a, ''Hello, who is this? I can hear you breathing, creep. Helloooo?''

''A-Ah, [Name]! This is, uh, Karamatsu.'' He stutters and twirls his hair around his finger. ''I was pondering over the possibility of us taking a stroll together, bathing in the sun and sharing masterful pastries－"

''A date. You want us to go on a date.''

''Yes,'' Karamatsu admits, or rather embraces the simplified idea of it all. ''It's okay if you don't want to, of course, m'lady! I-I wouldn't force you or anything, it's entirely up to you.''

You pinch your nose on the other line, ''Karamatsu, shut up, 'kay? Yes, I wanna go on a date with you, otherwise I wouldn't have paid for your broke ass last night. Now give me a time and place.''

''You do? You actually want to willingly hang out with me?'' He questions and you can practically smell his meekness and self-doubt oozing out of him even through the phone.

''You're the one who hit up my line first, no takebacks hotshot.'' You say, half-joking.

''Why, yes of course. As expected of my favourite Karamatsu girl!'' My only Karamatsu girl up-to-date. ''Obviously, you desire to spend every waking moment together with me, just as much as I do.''

''Time and place, please and thank you.'' You cut him off mid-effusion.

After arranging the date and going over the details, Karamatsu giddily spins and hugs himself. Then, he slaps his face and nods to no one in particular, as a form of confirmation to his invisible hype men.

Choromatsu stares at him judgementally from the stairway, face twisted in its usual sociopathic manner.

Osomatsu leans over in order to whisper in his ear, "What's up with him? He's acting weirder than usual."

Choromatsu scowls. "I don't wanna know, besides if we show interest that means we're going to have to put up with him."

Osomatsu nods in agreement and rubs under his nose with a finger, "True. It's way too damn early for his theatrics." Then, he throws in his assholish laugh for good measure.

The two of them choose to close their eyes and pretend this never happened in the first place, trudging up the stairs and going right back into their shared room without a care in the world.

★

You check the time and grimace. He's awfully late for someone who asked you out first. You wouldn't say you're the most punctual person in the world, but even still you decided to get all dolled up and ended up arriving early for a change of pace.

At first, you didn't mind waiting for him. Life happens after all, right? Maybe something came up last minute and he couldn't put it off, but if that were the case he would have informed you beforehand, right? Right?

You feel as though you're a step closer to becoming a wacko, but suddenly shake your head to rid your mind of such thoughts and smile to yourself. He'll show up, you're sure of it.

But after thirty more minutes of this nonsense, you're on the verge of throwing a tantrum and disrupting the public tranquility because you got stood up. What a fucking jerk, you think and puff out your cheeks.

Just as you're about to leave, maybe actually run someone over and kill them to make yourself feel better and perhaps blow all of your money on cheap gigolos, you stop and widen your eyes at the sight that greets you.

There's no mistaking those sequinned pants and shiny cowboy boots. Your date, with his wounds all gone and miraculously healed, saunters over to you like he's a runway model, catwalking with a bit of an attitude as if he didn't keep you waiting for half an hour.

He halts when there's barely any distance between the two of you, takes off his shades and flashes you his pearly whites which emit an ominous sparkle and you're temporarily rendered blind. ''Sorry for the wait.''

You grind your teeth together and force yourself to grin, ''Don't worry about it, but what took you so long.''

Karamatsu nervously chuckles and glances to the side, looking anywhere but you.

How the hell is he supposed to tell you that he spent most of the time hiding and sneaking peeks in your direction, but simply didn't have enough courage to approach you and that it took him at least twenty minutes to muster it? Simple, he won't tell you.

Instead, he strikes a pose under the nonexistent limelight. ''A star like me is obligated to be fashionably late.''

''Well, the star better make sure it doesn't happen again or it'll be one sad day for your fanbase,'' you threaten with an innocent smile, batting your eyelashes.

Karamatsu gulps and nods, but an invisible light bulb turns on above his head and he snaps his fingers. ''Oh, yes! How can I forget? I got a present for you, my Karamatsu girl."

You 'ooh' and 'aah' in curiosity, while he retrieves whatever he brought along with him in the meantime.

When he pulls out a tank top with his face on it, the exact same one he's wearing as well, you don't know what to say in response. In fact, your brain might actually be buffering.

Have we lost the impact of shame in our modern-day society? You think in disdain, fighting off the pain in your ribs.

He blushes and hands it to you nonchalantly, ''Here, wear this so suitors know not to mess with you. Once they see you and I together, matching garments and walking hand in hand, they shall understand who the one true power couple is.''

You blink twice and slowly accept the gift, then without any hesitation whatsoever you put on the tank top and wear it over your clothes. You're in too deep already, anyway.

''Thanks a lot, Karamatsu. I, uh, don't know what to say,'' you fake flattery at his sincere act of courtesy, though you're not necessarily lying either. You genuinely have no idea what to say to this entire ordeal.

''No need to thank me, sunshine.'' He pirouettes in slow motion and when he stops, he stretches his hand out for you to take. There is an aura surrounding you and you can make out dreamy bubbles floating around him. And where did the harp come from? ''Now allow me to whisk you off to paradise.''

You grab his hand and excitedly lead him to your parked motorcycle. ''Great, let's go!'' You pat the pillion and stare at him expectantly.

Upon noticing his silence, you stop ushering him to the seat. ''What's wrong, Karamatsu?''

He scratches his nape and lets his head droop low. ''Is it... Um, do we have to get on top of that...'' He points a weak finger at the bike and trembles. What can he say, he has a fear of motorbikes now.

You pout at his inquiry. ''What, you don't wanna? But I thought you were into stuff like this. Why else would you wear a leather jacket?''

Karamatsu winces and immediately rushes to pacify you. ''No, no! That's not it! I was testing your limits, my dear Karamatsu girl. I apologize if－''

You laugh and place a hand on his shoulder, rubbing it soothingly. ''I was just kidding, but if you're really scared we don't have to. It's my fault, after all.''

Karamatsu juts his lip and furrows his eyebrows in determination. He draws a breath and wraps his fingers around your wrist with ease, advancing towards the vehicle with you right behind him.

You gaze at him with something akin to awe, or is it incredulity? He plants himself on the seat and looks back to address you.

''A real man knows better than to turn down a lady and disappoint her,'' he states conclusively. You chuckle and follow suit, sitting down on the saddle.

You grip his arms and move them so they're wrapped around your waist. You twist and turn the key and the engine roars to life in one swoop. ''Hold on tight, [Name] boy.'' You tease his way of talking and take off without a second warning.

His head smacks against your back with a rather rough thud and Karamatsu's clasp around your midsection is already tight enough to cut off your air supply. And even if you feel his tears dampening your clothes, you don't comment on it. Instead, you pick up even more speed and in turn, Karamatsu's hug deepens.

''Shouldn't we be wearing safety helmets,'' Karamatsu yells through the lump in his throat, his ears ringing and head spinning.

You shout back at him, ''Who even wears these things nowadays?'' At the lack of your elaboration, he figures you're dead serious and he's petrified all over again.

You laugh maniacally, or at least you do so in his mind, as you go off course, making sharp turns left and right at every corner to wreak havoc on innocent people's lives.

You narrowly dodge two pedestrians and Karamatsu is finally desensitized enough to smile and blush as he takes in the ever-changing view.

There's something sweet in the way you repeat a certain motion whenever you hear him chuckle and cheer, he can't pinpoint if that's the starving desperation that thirsts for touch and companionship or something else entirely.

But then something punctures your tire and he's pulled out of dreamland all at once.

The two of you wobble on the unstable bike for a bit before you pull him by the jacket and jump off the motorcycle, rolling on the ground like you two were in an action movie. The motorcycle continues on its way without your guidance and eventually crashes into a tree, exploding.

A tire with a flame on it flies over your heads and you study the fire, unimpressed with pursed lips. ''Thank god it was a gift from my ex, otherwise I would've been in some deep shit.''

Karamatsu sinks to the ground and curls up in a ball.

★

You plop your ass on the grass next to Karamatsu, handing him a soda you bought from the convenience store nearby. Karamatsu mutters a small 'thank you' and takes a sip.

The two of you sit in complete silence on the riverbank and you're too abashed to begin talking first, finding the whole outcome to be your fault. You've given this man too many apologies for them to feel truthful at this point. Maybe he should do the most logical thing and start evading you. You deserve it.

Amidst your inner conflict, Karamatsu fixes you with a solemn look and chooses to break the ice. ''[Name], am I ugly?''

Taken aback by the unusual question, you cock your head to the side. ''Huh?''

''Tell me, am I ugly?''

You consider him for a moment longer and then gently cup his face with your hands, inspecting it from every possible angle you could manage.

You narrow your eyes in concentration before ruffling his hair. ''Not at all.''

''Really?''

''Not in the slightest. Well, at least I see the appeal." You shrug noncommittally. ''Why're you asking, though? That pretty much came out of nowhere.''

''Because if I'm not ugly, then why would you want to kill me? Every woman I meet either ignores me, beats me half to death or hates me. Why? Am I really that painful? Is that going to be my fate for the entirety of my life?''

You blink and hum in thought, placing a finger on your chin. ''Very, you're real painful but not enough for me to want to kill you, I guess. I think you just have extremely bad luck.''

Karamatsu frowns and crosses his arms, ''You think so? Is it really just bad luck or is there something bigger at play?''

The two of you ponder over what the real cause of Karamatsu's misfortune may be before your stomachs growl in protest simultaneously.

This seems to revive his alter ego because Karamatsu jolts and he appears pleased, almost as if he had been waiting for this exact same moment. He chuckles and spreads eagle, facing the sun. You're concerned he's going to get a heat stroke.

''It's finally my turn,'' Karamatsu announces, though you're not sure he knows what he's talking about. ''I shall take the princess to an exquisite place, where she can try real fine dining!''

He strokes his imaginary facial hair, winking. Even his eyebrows seem more refined. ''Follow my lead, dove.'' You were going to do just that even without him saying anything, but you salute him regardless.

Even though mere minutes ago it was still sunny, for some reason it's already dark out. You and Karamatsu trek for what must have felt like hours until he stops dead in his tracks. You wonder why until you spot the lonely food stall and smile.

You and Karamatsu make yourselves comfortable on the bench and he greets the owner, ''Yo, Chibita! How's your night been so far?''

It just turned nighttime... You deadpan.

''Y'know, dealing with jackasses of your kind－,'' Chibita scoffs before pausing, turning to you with unblinking eyes. Then, after he's done assessing you, he redirects his attention to Karamatsu. ''You payin' for rental girlfriends again? Get some dignity, man.''

You raise an eyebrow in question, but sneer and hide it with your fist. ''Rental girlfriend? That's a good idea, why didn't I think of that?''

Karamatsu's expression sours. ''[Name] isn't a rental. Besides who are you to talk, Chibimi?''

''Shut up, don't remind me! I was in a dark place, idjit,'' Chibita yells in response and smacks him on the head with a ladle and you watch their antics with a hint of amusement.

''Anyway,'' Karamatsu waves him off, despite the large bump he earned on his forehead. ''Give us the best oden and beer you've got in store, I'll make sure my woman eats right tonight.''

You shudder in surprise as Karamatsu takes your hand into his own, gazing at you with what must be an entire galaxy in his eyes and you wonder where he found those E.T. contact lenses. ''Don't hold back, order whatever your heart desires. It's all on me.''

Chibita complies with the request, serving two portions of oden and the beverages Karamatsu asked for. Though, he can't help but want to sate his curiosity. ''With what money?''

''With the money I exploited from my Mommy,'' Karamatsu boasts like that's something to take immense pride in.

After three to four rounds of drinking and pigging out on Chibita's oden, it was time to wrap up and call it a night.

Karamatsu snakes his hands in his pockets in search of the money he claimed to have, but he freezes as he finds nothing instead. Turning his pockets inside out, a fly flutters out of them and Karamatsu pales.

You seem to get the memo and nod conspiratorially his way.

You square your shoulders as Karamatsu nervously clears his throat. ''Chibita...,'' he begins before throwing you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. ''I'm so sorry, I'll pay you back someday!''

Chibita stands still for a couple of seconds, processing. Afterwards, he lunges over the counter and begins chasing you. ''Damn it, idjit! You promised you'd pay, get back here! Damn it!''

With Chibita hot on your heels, Karamatsu goes through several alleyways as last resort shortcuts, and you come to the conclusion that Chibita is probably really scary if Karamatsu's going through so much trouble just to lose him and shake him off your trail.

"You can put me down now," you grumble and make a face. Karamatsu panics, just now realizing what predicament he had put you in, and sets you down with extra care.

"I apologize for that," he huffs out, attempting to catch his breath with his hands on his knees. You rub his back, acting as his emotional support.

Looking around the vicinity in search for any signs of Chibita, you come up empty. Helping Karamatsu to his feet, you deliver the good news. "He's gone, so you can stop looking constipated."

He sighs, relieved. "Such is the result of an eventful night. However, I will make sure your journey back home is undisturbed."

You shake your head in disagreement and throw an arm around his shoulder. "I think you've had enough, tough guy. Here, how about I take you home?"

Karamatsu seems distraught at the very idea of it, but for your sake he flips his hair and leers. "Your wish is my command."

With his directions, you manage to escort him back to his house safe and sound. Karamatsu opens his mouth to blurt out something, but is caught off guard by the abrupt change in the weather.

You both run with impressive speed under his house's roof to take cover and you deduct that the rain wouldn't be letting up for a while.

"Well, this sucks," you point out the obvious. Karamatsu nods wordlessly.

You think about calling a taxi, but something gets draped over you. You look down and are pleasantly astonished to discover that it's Karamatsu's leather jacket.

Said man is quivering in his flimsy excuse of a tank top, licentiously grinning at you with a very obvious snot bubble emerging out of his nostrils. "C-C-Can't le-let my favorite Karamatsu girl catch a cold." He elaborates for whatever reason.

"Well, I can't keep my favorite [Name] boy out for much longer, either." You give him a brief hug and were about to pull away, but Karamatsu is apparently not done dishing out surprises.

He grips your shoulders with resolve, before leaning in and kissing you on the cheek. It's a quick, demure kiss and if you were to blink, you would've missed it.

Nonplussed by his own boldness, Karamatsu stumbles towards the door with two left feet, barely succeeding in opening it.

"Get back home safely, [Name]!" He bids you farewell in true virgin fashion and slams the door shut in your face. You cackle, violently laughing to yourself and then crack a small smile, pressing a palm to your kissed cheek.

You must look like a fool, standing out in the rain while wearing a loser's clothes, but honestly? You've never felt better after such a tragic date.

★

You sigh and sling a towel over your shoulder, more than a little happy to finally clock out. Tonight had been particularly busy for some reason and working with a slight hangover was far from ideal, but it wasn't something you couldn't handle.

You dab your fellow bartender up, not even bothering to spare him a glance, and begin packing up your things with fervor.

He issues you a sly wink, ''Going home so soon, [Last Name]?''

Get a clue, wise guy. You internally roll your eyes, but only offer an exhausted smile. ''Not necessarily, got to make a pit stop on the way home.''

Akihito, you remember, folds his hands behind his head, rocking on his heels. ''Paying your boyfriend a visit?'' He hums cheekily.

You blink. ''Huh?''

He gestures towards the paper bag in your hands, which barely concealed the shitty leather jacket you were so generously lent.

You furrow your brows and scratch your cheek with an awkward expression. ''Wouldn't really call him a boyfriend...''

Akihito stretches, whining, ''You can be so cold, y'know. I feel sorry for the poor guy.''

''Another word and I'll really make you sorry.''

Akihito throws up a peace sign, grinning from ear to ear. ''Night, [Last Name]!''

You grumble under your breath and throw the towel on the ground. Akihito hears you say something along the lines of 'thought so' and other such death threats, but he feeds off your negativism. He odiosynthesizes and you know that, which makes you feel better about brushing him off, at least.

The walk to Karamatsu's place is as unmemorable as can be, and while it wouldn't kill you to see him again and chat for a bit, you don't think you'd be able to put up with him for long (or anyone else for that matter). When you spot his house, you brace yourself before sharply knocking on the door.

Well, you were supposed to knock but somehow developing last-minute Spidey senses, Karamatsu tears open the door to his balcony and puts a stop to your supposedly evil schemes. ''Don't'!'' He manages to both whisper and scream at the same time.

''What are you doing here at this hour, angel? Trying to get me crucified, perhaps?'' Karamatsu interrogates you and considering how disheveled his appearance is, you reach the conclusion that his fictional persona is merely an afterthought at the moment. You find a peace of mind at the conjecture.

''I'm just here to return your jacket,'' you say like it was obvious, which it should have been.

''I see.'' He doesn't see jackshit. ''But I cannot help but wonder why you didn't call beforehand. I, too, need my fair share of beauty sleep, sweetheart.''

Your eye twitches and you ball your fists, but remember to count to ten in your head.

''For your information, I called three times but maybe if someone bothered to pick up, I wouldn't be robbing you of your sweet dreams,'' you hiss in reply, proud of yourself for not chucking his damned jacket in the trash can in his presence.

Karamatsu rubs the crust from his eyes, though he does appear sheepish to a degree. ''My sincere apologies.''

You scoff, glad to have come out on top at this pointless back-and-forth.

Karamatsu anxiously chews on his lower lip, trying his best to conjure up a plan that will avoid his certain death at the hands of his brothers. Not even for waking them up at three in the morning, but for the mere fact that he was 'romancing' a hot chick.

Then he grins and looks down at you like a mad genius. He couldn't be further from the word.

''Climb up and join me on the roof, [Name],'' he suggests and acts as if it was a perfectly reasonable demand.

You undeliberately blank out for a second before chuckling lowly and nodding in understanding. ''I get it now. You're actually fucking nuts and escaped from a correctional facility.''

Look who's talking, Karamatsu wants to retort but he keeps it to himself. He beckons you over encouragingly, ''Please, [Name] dearest. I promise I won't let anything happen to you. I'll be your guardian angel.''

You're acutely aware that something will definitely happen, so you only click your tongue, still apprehensive about the proposition.

Karamatsu continues to stare at you with that tender smile, though it's different this time. His hair is sticking out in different directions, ungroomed. His eyes are heavy, bloodshot and sleep still clings to him as he staggers slightly in his step. But he's smiling at you, it's real.

You put aside your concerns for now and exhale slowly, biting the handles of your paper bag.

You jump and grab a hold of the portico, flailing your legs to help stabilize yourself. Your fingers burn because this is the most physically exerting thing you've done in your life thus far.

You push yourself up on the portico and, just like a mollusk, inch forward bit by bit. Karamatsu tries his hardest not to laugh at your misery, but he's unable to take you seriously. You're moving slower than an old man with two broken legs, plus you look like you have a stick shoved up your ass.

Once you're a safe distance away from the edge, you extend your arms and Karamatsu takes this as his cue to act and be useful.

He grabs your hands and hauls you up on the balcony, but this quest is not over just yet. You have to conquer the final boss; the rooftop.

''I have an idea,'' you both blurt out at random. You don't care much about that, but Karamatsu is over the moon at the perfect synchronization.

Coincidence or not, the two of you end up cooking up the same strategy.

You get on top of Karamatsu's shoulders and with the sudden added height, reaching the roof is a piece of cake. After settling your ass down on the tiles, you grit your teeth and clasp hands with him for the umpteenth time, having him work his way up as well.

With a heave-ho, Karamatsu is free to lie down beside you.

You're hit with a much needed reality check. All of this over a second-hand jacket? Unbelievable.

Tossing the paper bag on his lap carelessly, you scowl. ''You're welcome, asshole.''

''C-Come on, my dear Karamatsu girl. It wasn't that bad, right?''

''Speak for yourself...''

Karamatsu props up his elbows, craning his head up just enough to be able to see you. ''It's such a shame, however. The view from here is perfect, all that's missing is my guitar. Too bad my precious brothers are sleeping soundly.''

''Yeah, about that. I don't know what any of your brothers have to do with this, 'cause whatever the fuck this was could've been easily prevented.'' You cross your arms and turn away from him, establishing a decent amount of room between the two of you.

''You wouldn't understand, darling. Yes, even if I did give you an explanation.'' He responds, and you feel as though he was reading your mind. You shiver at the sheer thought.

The two of you don't indulge in idle chatter afterwards since you're too busy looking back on all of your previous life decisions, trying to figure out what led you to go down such paths. Karamatsu, on the other hand, is gliding himself closer to you.

You notice his ventures and decide to cut him some slack. You shift, erasing the previous space you set and move a hand to place on his shoulder. He hiccups at the touch and begins stammering, playing with his fingers. ''Hahaha... your eyes shine so brightly under the moon's glow.''

You shush him, still not in the mood to listen to his poetic nonsense and bullshit of similar nature.

The two of you stare each other down and Karamatsu does his best to put up a brave front, but you're not blind and you see the way he peers at you from under his lashes, sweating like a musclehead.

Before things could escalate any further, which you doubt is something that would have happened considering who exactly you're dealing with, the both of you slip off the edge.

You're falling and Karamatsu is too, and while you're mostly accepting of the scenario, he isn't. You're more surprised at the fact that this man-child's shrill wails aren't waking up the entire neighbourhood, though they're probably accustomed to these kinds of phenomena by now.

In order to break your fall, Karamatsu adjusts mid-air so as to be under you. He shoves your face into his chest, embracing you but his actions prove to be the wrong move as they merely speed up the process of nosediving into the concrete.

The two of you flop like prepped meatballs on a grill, a sinistrous thump resonating at the dead of night.

You briefly register the sizzling elbow pain you've obtained and Karamatsu's jaw headbutting you at the last second, but other than that you took it pretty well － all thanks to Karamatsu's interference. Perhaps chivalry isn't dead?

While you got out of this with barely any injuries, just small scratches, the same couldn't be said for Karamatsu, who was currently experiencing concussions.

You pat his chest lightly to snatch up his attention. Karamatsu groans, seeing stars floating above him. You make yourself comfortable despite the joint strains, snuggling up to him. ''I'm egging your house soon, be aware.''

He passes out before he could formulate a coherent reply.

★

You haven't seen neither hide nor hair of Karamatsu ever since the rooftop fiasco. And you don't want to sound needy, or downright crazy for that matter, but you miss the man with horrible pick-up lines and over-the-top attitude. Him and his awful sense of fashion, not to mention the strong cologne.

Perhaps you've been infected with some new kind of mental illness, one so new and fresh out of the oven it has yet to be diagnosed by teenage girls with too much free time on their hands.

First, you visit Chibita for any sort of intel he might possess.

''Karamatsu? Sorry, him and his brothers hadn't stopped by as of recent.'' He shrugs apologetically and whips out oden skewers, serving them to you.

You nod and grin at him in understanding, paying for the food before scurrying away on a full stomach.

Next, you consider what other options you have at your disposal. Calling him has proven to be absolutely useless and you're not sure if paying his house a visit would be a good idea, given how worked up he got over such a possibility last time.

You search far and wide, in every nook and cranny, not leaving a single stone unturned. But alas, no dice. Not a trace of him anywhere and you speculate the probability of him glitching into The Backrooms.

You're about to give up, hunting Karamatsu for sport and worrying about him won't do you any good.

You're not getting paid for this, you also don't know him all too well to be actively seeking him out. His dramatic temperament has rubbed off on you, but you're ready to wash it off.

See if I care, you huff and kick a stray can in your way. You're aware of how childishly you're behaving, but you bluff fake indifference as if anyone would be stupid enough to believe you.

You stomp angrily and punt another can with your foot, but accidentally hit someone when doing so.

You flinch and prepare to half-ass an apology before realizing you hit the man you've been getting grey hairs over.

''Karamatsu?'' You blink and crouch down to shake him by the shoulders. ''Hey, what's wrong?''

Karamatsu weakly smiles and shuffles away, offering you a seat next to him on the curb.

You frown, ''Seriously, what happened?''

Karamatsu laughs, manspreading. ''I'm grateful for your concern, but it's... Well, it's simply a foolish thing to be upset about.''

''If it upset you, then it's not dumb.'' You respond, reassuring him to the best of your ability. ''Now, spill the beans.''

''I've been thinking about my personality, I guess?'' He mutters and cracks his knuckles, he tends to fidget quite a lot. ''Like, am I annoying? Trying too hard? Should I stop?''

You listen to him and stay quiet, occassionally rubbing his back. ''I want to be liked.'' You quirk an eyebrow at that, but don't interrupt him otherwise.

''It's lame at my big age to want to be popular, but I wanna be kissed. I wanna have a girlfriend and go on dates, but I'm afraid my personality will drive everyone away."

For fuck's sake, he was called Shittymatsu and frankly, he's surprised you were able to withstand him for so long.

''Karamatsu, want me to be completely honest,'' you ask. He nods rapidly at you. You hum softly, ''I didn't lie before, you are painful. You say so much corny stuff, I'm impressed you can even look yourself in the mirror.''

He cringes, but you pay him no heed. Instead, you continue, ''I mean, really? Who wears tank tops with their face slapped right in the middle, what a fucking dork. But, y'know, I kinda like it now.''

''Huh?''

''I think that type of shit grew on me, for better or worse. I, too, have become a member of the cornball community." You admit and you shudder at your mushy honesty.

You rub the back of your head in embarrassment, "When you say all of these dumb nicknames and act like you own all of Akatsuka Ward a small part of me wishes I die on the spot, but I don't necessarily hate it.''

You hug him and bring him closer to you. You snicker and peck him on the forehead, ''Don't worry so much about who ignores you or hates you is all, when you have someone who likes you despite every cringe one-liner right in front of ya.''

''You're right.'' Karamatsu returns the hug, sniffing and holding back tears. ''[Name]?''

''Yeah?''

''You're a true Karamatsu girl.''

Getting kisses from a hot lady? Karamatsu would love that. And the prospect of you being the one to give them to him, with that warm smile which makes your nose crinkle up, makes the scenario sound even better.

But for now, he's content with you simply pressed up against his side, where he can easily peer over at you and study your face until it's burned and etched forever into his brain. Subtly, of course.

You look up at him with a raised eyebrow after feeling him drill holes in your head since forever, which in turn leads Karamatsu to let out an urbane chuckle and lamely pretend to fix his stray strands of hair, and you can't help but snort at his usual theatrical character.

You sigh and rest your forehead against his. "Painful," you mumble under your breath, though definitely loud enough for him to hear, then giggle.

Karamatsu playfully frowns in response. "My flower, you should know by now that no pain means no gain." He tuts with an exaggerated wag of his finger, eyes animatedly glittering.

You laugh in utter disbelief before shaking your head, wrapping a loose arm around his waist. "Sorry, sorry. You know damn well I don't mean it, right?"

Karamatsu hums and his lips curl upwards to form a small, fond smile. He places his chin on your shoulder and you lean into him even more.

Yeah, Karamatsu could get used to this. For now, that was more than enough for him.

Getting kisses from a hot lady really would be nice, but watching the sun set on the cold pavement with you next to him feels good, too. And hey, you are a hot lady, so what's there to hate?

And to think all of this was thanks to your irresponsible driving.

Osomatsu whistles, nudging Choromatsu as they stared at the two of you from afar. Despite their earlier sentiments, curiosity got the better of them and they decided to investigate their brother's own private time. It's not like he could file a restraining order against them, he would be tortured.

"Kudos to Karamatsu, I actually salute him for managing to bag a real human being. Didn't think he had it in him." Osomatsu snickers, hands deep in his hoodie's pockets.

Choromatsu appears depleted beyond belief, eyeing you both with evident disapproval on his facial features, "What sort of lobotomized romance was this? Felt more like a simulation."

Osomatsu and Choromatsu sigh, both fully synchronized, and groan out, "It should have been me."

#ososan x reader #osomatsu san x reader #ososan karamatsu x reader #karamatsu x reader #matsuno karamatsu x reader #osomatsu san karamatsu x reader #ososan matsuno karamatsu x reader #osomatsu san matsuno karamatsu x reader #karamatsu #matsuno karamatsu

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bbgnyx · 9 months

Note

Hi babe it's me leigh ✌ Saw your song requests like 10 secs ago so 👀👀

song name: in the stars by benson boone

song lyric: and now you're in the stars and six-feet's never felt so far

pairing: minho x female reader

disc: the reader dies and minho is just devastated and he cries for the first time in front of everyone and stays ☹️ (I'm bad at descriptions save me-)

Anyway thx for reading!!!

a/n: omg babe this song has been running in my head recently so this request was like you read my mind 😭✋. This was so sad to write honestly, hope it matches what you had in mind!

my taglist is open btw, just message me if you wanna be part of it!!

And now you're in the stars and six-feet's never felt so far~

genre: angst

warnings: very sad, church and god are mentioned, mentions of blood and death, indirect mention of cancer, mention of a funeral. lmk if I miss anything

Sunday mornings used to hold so much joy for Minho. It was the one day he could spend with you, and it filled his heart with happiness. The two of you would go on adorable picnics, visit malls, and sometimes even attend church together. He couldn't help but think how beautiful you looked with your hair up and that radiant smile on your face. Minho was a softie, but only when it came to you.

He remembers the times when he would get jealous of you because Soonie Doongie and Dori seemed to love you more than him. He cherishes the memories of cuddling up in bed with you, watching movies together. Every little thing about you, he adored. You were his angel. But now, Sunday mornings are no longer his favorite. Not after everything that has happened.

When he was with you, Sunday mornings held a different meaning. Now that you're gone, Minho knows that nothing will ever be the same again. If he doesn't have concerts or practice, he simply sleeps in, avoiding going out because it only brings back painful memories. He has even lost his faith in God, burying it alongside you, deep beneath the earth.

Minho has lost count of how many times he has stood there, screaming at God, questioning why the love of his life was taken away from him. Why did God seem to hate him so much, leaving him to suffer like this? He is constantly lost in his thoughts, not knowing what else to do but cry himself to sleep, knowing that you will never be there to comfort him again.

Minho still remembers the day you were admitted into the hospital, they said you were okay, they said you only had to go through a small surgery. All of it were lies. That day, Minho’s band had won an award, but he couldn’t even relish the happiness as he soon got a call from your mother.

“She’s in a critical stage, she has lost a lot of blood, the doctors don’t know if they can save her”, your mom said sobbing through the phone. At that moment, it took Minho his everything not to leave the award show immediately and fly back home to you. He had been crying all day and all night, worried about you. He should be there with you, he thought.

On Sunday, he took the award and flew back to you as soon as possible. Only to be informed that you’re gone, you’re not with him anymore. You had passed away.

Minho remembers the day of your funeral. The weight of your absence crushed him, burying his heart alongside you, six feet under the ground. “It’s okay Minho, she loves you with all her life,” your mother said, trying to console him. He felt weak and helpless then.

All these pent-up emotions let loose at his most recent concert. You had always told him to show his emotions to others, not to close his heart away. So he cried, he cried like he had lost everything and he did. He lost you, and you were his everything, you were the earth and he was the moon and now he didn’t have anything to revolve around. On that stage, he crumbled, his fellow members offering solace, while fans shed tears alongside him, showering him with words of comfort.

It felt as though he had loved you for an eternity, but he realized that the time he spent with you was merely a fraction of his lifetime, while you had loved him throughout your entire existence. This realization shattered him to his core. How was it fair? You had promised to always be by his side, to never leave him alone. And you kept that promise, remaining faithful even in death. But what about him? He wasn't there when you underwent surgery, he wasn’t there through your suffering and he wasn't even there when you took your final breath.

He felt stupid not to realise that you were suffering. He hated that you hid your condition from him. He always wondered why you asked him what he would do if you weren’t there. He always replied, “I’ll protect you so nothing ever happens to you, my love”. But now he couldn’t protect you and that broke him, and it would break him till he took his last breath and he would be lying if he said he didn’t wish that day came soon so he could see you again. But all he knows now is that he loved you, loves you and will continue loving you.

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venusxsturnio · 6 months

Text

FLAMES OF PASSION

PAIRINGღ chris x black!fem!reader

SUMMARYღ what happens when y/n and chris get into a heated argument?

FROM VENUSღ hi guys! wassup, how are we doing this morning? good. well I'M NOT! THEY TOOK AWAY THE BOOPS! i'm so sorry for that, anyways.....lmk what y'all think. ✿ btw this was not a request. lowkey i don't even know what i'm doing, but remember my requests are always open! and remember i love criticism. :)

WARNINGSღfluff...angst

proofread!

The afternoon sun cascaded through the sheer curtains, casting a warm glow across the cozy living room where Y/N and Chris stood facing each other, their expressions fraught with tension. The air was thick with unresolved emotions, crackling with the remnants of their heated argument.

"You just don't get it, do you, Chris?" Y/N's voice was strained, her frustration evident in the way her hands clenched into fists at her sides.

Chris ran a hand through his hair, his jaw tense. "I'm trying, Y/N, but you're not making this easy."

Their voices reverberated off the walls, echoing the turmoil within. Hurtful words had been exchanged, wounds inflicted with careless abandon. Yet beneath the anger lay a deeper longing, a desperate desire to bridge the growing chasm between them.

"I just wish you'd listen to me for once!" Y/N's voice wavered, tears threatening to spill from her eyes.

Chris sighed heavily, the weight of their disagreement bearing down on him. "I know, and I'm sorry. I should have been more understanding."

For a moment, silence enveloped them, a fragile ceasefire in the midst of chaos. Slowly, tentatively, Y/N took a step forward, her gaze softening as she reached out to touch Chris's arm.

"I don't want to fight anymore," she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper.

Chris met her gaze, his own eyes reflecting a mix of regret and longing. "Neither do I."

In that moment, the walls they had built around their hearts began to crumble, the barriers of pride and stubbornness giving way to the vulnerability they both shared. With a shaky breath, Y/N closed the distance between them, wrapping her arms around Chris in a tentative embrace.

"I love you," she whispered, her voice muffled against his chest.

Chris held her close, the tension melting away as he buried his face in her hair. "I love you too, more than anything."

In the warmth of each other's arms, they found solace, a sanctuary from the storm of their emotions. And as they stood there, entwined in an embrace born of forgiveness and understanding, they knew that no matter what challenges lay ahead, their love would always be their guiding light.

FROM VENUSღ y'all. How was it?!?! don't y'all just love chris? I KNOW I DO!! oh and to whoever requested that Christian reader fic, i don't even know what i'm doing! pls dm me! it would help. don't forget requests/dm's are open :)

#chris sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #venusxsturnio #nick sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo x reader #sturniolo fluff #black!fem!reader #sturniolo imagine #sturniolo #x reader #chris sturniolo x reader #chris x reader #sturniolo triplets x reader #character x reader #x female reader

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oneofthosebells · 7 months

Text

SCREAMING.

Okay, initial thoughts: absolutely loved it.

Was it perfect? No. I've got a couple of niggles and nitpicks, and some things I wished they'd gone deeper on, but I was never expecting perfection so that doesn't bother me.

Did it give me all the feelings and address pretty much all the things I wanted addressed and give me several moments of full on squeaking at the TV? Yep. I'm happy.

Some more spoilery initial thoughts under the cut:

Felice as a chef?? YES. I've been trying and rejecting various future career headcanons for Felice for ages now and this one suits her perfectly.

(Could have done with more Felice in general, I do feel like she was done a bit dirty again, but I really loved the bits of her we did get.)

Absolutely LOVED the portrayal of Wilmon's relationship this season. They were just so teenager, it was glorious - swinging from big emotion to big emotion, from all-consuming love to hate and anger and shame. It's all so intense at that age and I do think the show does a great job of showing that.

Navigating that change from 'we want to be together' to 'okay, now we are together, how does that actually work in reality' was the main thing I wanted to see this season so I'm really happy we got that.

Simon's jacket on top of his checked trousers is the greatest thing I've ever seen btw. Still giggling about it.

Wanted more of an arc for Sara if I'm honest, but like Felice I really enjoyed some of the stuff we did get - the conversation where Sara was worried she'd end up like Micke was brilliant.

August...eh. I don't hate a redemption arc for August tbh as I personally believe no one is beyond forgiveness and redemption. I get why some people might hate it though.

Overall, this season felt much more low-key than the previous two? Which isn't a criticism - it took me a couple of episodes to get into it, but I started to really enjoy it once I did. Less of the soapy angst and plot twists of previous seasons and more focused on the characters.

Oh and as certain as I've ever been of Wilmon endgame. I'm absolutely sure Hillerska will close in the final episode, so it might be a bit of a bittersweet, trying long-distance kind of thing, but not a break up.

My personal theory/hope right now: Wille tells the Royal Court to fuck their prince school and he and Simon go with the girls to New York for the summer.

#young royals #yr s3 #yr s3 spoilers

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k0ff1n · 12 days

Text

Even if

Fellow honest x reader (not yuu)

Summary: random summer night with the two of you sharing feelings? Established relationship btw so he ain't rejecting no one eheheh. Fluff and slight angst I think? The most they do is kiss so it's sfw.

Notes: sorry if it sucks but it's been some months since I've written anything and english is isn't my first language, in any case enjoy! :D

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It was rare to see him so calm. The night was just like the past one, quiet and warm, that type of warmth that doesn't make it uncomfortable to wear a shirt but that at the same time still makes you want to drink something cold, because you know that if you drank tea it would get too hot and then that balance would be shattered. He didn't seem to be paying much attention to his surroundings, then again this was the only time of the day where he could relax, even if a little, so why take it away from him.

The usual smell of smoke lingered in the air, a thin cloud making it a little harder to see him as clearly as you wanted. He never stopped smoking, since the first day you met he always had a cigar or cigarette between his fingers, it almost amazed you how his voice didn't change that much even after all these years of consuming them. Not that you could blame him, his life had never been easy on him and if he found peace in a piece of paper that tasted like nicotine then he could keep on smoking as much as he wanted, it would probably hurt him more if he stopped this habit than keep on smoking.

Gidel wasn't around, not that it surprised you, just like his brother he usually used the late evening for himself, even if he didn't smoke he still needed some time alone, just like everybody else.

You kept on staring at him, looking at him with too much love in your eyes, even if he wasn't a nice person, even if he didn't take care of himself as much as he took care of his brother, even if the shirt he was wearing was probably the same he wore the week before because, when you don't have time and money, every little thing counts and a new piece of clothing isn't in those calculations. He wasn't the best, and he knew it, he knew it since he was little because in a world like this he would have never been enough even if he kept on trying, even if he had enough magic to go to school, to make a name for himself, one associated with bravery, power... and not a sketchy place where he had to 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤 𝘩𝘶𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘴 to survive.

The cloud of smoke was now on you, staining your clothes with that smell that never wants to be washed of, that smell that's better than a perfume when associated with something nice, with 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 nice, and he was, to you. Not to the students, not to his boss, not to the people that he had to convince to come to a magic place just to be sold as puppets, but to 𝘺𝘰𝘶.

To 𝘺𝘰𝘶 because 𝘺𝘰𝘶 never criticized his antics, because 𝘺𝘰𝘶 never complained if he didn't have the energy to keep everything tidy, because 𝘺𝘰𝘶 never mentioned his lack of knowledge because of the system that failed him.

To 𝘺𝘰𝘶 because he knew he loved you since the first time you met.

The yellow light of the nearby street lamp was the only thing making his figure visible to your eyes, a sight that never failed to make you smile, even if only internally sometimes.

"Doll, you are staring..."

He wasn't annoyed, even if his tone would make anyone think that, he wasn't and you knew it.

"Does it bother you?"

"...."

"You know it never does"

And there it was, that light smile he wore only when around you, one which took too much time to finally see, and now that you could you would never be bored by.

"Well that's good to know because I wasn't gonna stop anyway"

The sound of his laugh ringing in your ears was the only thing distracting you from the way his canines were shining thanks to what little moonlight reached the two of you. As much as you wanted to compliment him for every little thing about his appearance and personality it always felt as if he would take it as a joke and never believe you, despite how many times you said you loved him.

Well maybe there's a first time for everything... who knows.

"Love?"

"Mmmhh"

"Have I ever told you how pretty you are?"

The silence after that was almost deafening.

"If you say so"

Damn him and his non existent self esteem.

"I don't just 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘴𝘰 I know so"

Even if your eyes were searching for his they could never meet, thanks to his brilliant idea of 𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥 every time you tried to have a heartfelt conversation.

At least deciding to sit on his lap made it easier to look at him, the only downside being the two shades of red adorning his face making it harder to see his freckles in the night.

"Hey"

"𝘏𝘦𝘺"

His voice sounded muffled, probably thanks to how much he was pressing his face in the palm of your hand, surely to try and keep on hiding himself.

"Love, look at me"

Slowly, too slowly, he decided that maybe looking at you wasn't so bad, despite how much his head told him not to. His ears were twitching, probably the only thing expressing how he was feeling seeing the situation.

"You okay?"

"𝘖𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘭𝘭"

What he wanted to say was something along the lines of "of course now that you are in my arms" but it sounded too cheesy even for him.

"If you say so"

Yeah he sure was, considering how hard his hands were gripping your waist and how he began to hide his face in the crook of your neck.

"It's okay love, 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘰𝘬𝘢𝘺"

His grip on you tightening only meant one thing, he was feeling worse than usual. Slowly moving your hands up his back you finally reached the back of his head, fluffy hair the color of caramel now between your fingers, a hum of approval murmured near your ear while your fingertips begun to gently stroke his ears. You knew he liked it, it was one of the first things he told you when you begun seeing each other and, after so much time you couldn't count how many occasions ended this way.

Finally his hands started to loose that bruising grip that had you almost blocked in the same position for too much time to be considered comfortable, deciding to move them on your hips to help keeping you on his lap.

"Do you think that Gidel will come here soon?"

"Probably not, he's usually walking near the ferris wheel at this time, going back here would take more than twenty minutes"

"Good, more time for us"

"What do you mean by tha-"

Unfortunately for him his time to speak was cut short by your mouth on his, shutting him up completely. With a hand still on the back of his head he didn't have many options but to keep the same pace as yours. As much as he didn't have money to buy things like chapstick he still had pretty soft lips, a nice contrast to the sharp teeth behind them.

Pulling away was always the hardest part, the both of you unsure on who had to separate from the other first, resulting in a rather awkward series of random messy kisses near the lips but never perfectly on them because of the dizziness.

Damn the lack of oxygen.

Small fleeting pecks were now placed on his neck, slowly going back up to once again reach his face. Finally able to look in his eyes 𝘺𝘰𝘶 were now the one left speechless. He 𝘥𝘪𝘥 look as flushed as you thought, except for the smile that adorned his face. A genuine one, probably the most beautiful one you have ever seen him wear. He was stunning, he really was. Be it the messy hair, the freckled cheeks, the honey colored irises or, in this case, the small smile gracing his lips.

You probably ended up with the same expression because the next thing you knew was him looking a little worried and asking why did you look so happy.

"Why do you think uh?"

"If I knew I wouldn't have asked no?"

He was smirking, he knew what you were thinking but he wanted to hear it, he would never get tired of hearing you say it.

"I love you, 𝘸𝘢𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘰𝘣𝘷𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴?"

And of course it was, it was as clear as day but he had to listen to you say it, he had to watch the way your lips moved while you said it because damn it, it was probably the most addicting thing he had ever come across.

"𝘠𝘦𝘢𝘩, 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘩 𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴"

His heartbeat was calmer now, it surely was easier to hear when you face was pressed against his chest, feeling him move even so slightly with every breath he took. The positions were reversed now, his hand on the back of your head, making sure that if you fell asleep you wouldn't hit it anywhere. His other arm was still around you, keeping you close, almost shielding you from any possible danger.

The night was still warm, summer still present even if now coming to a close. At this point you were the one covered in moonlight, a blanket on your skin making you glow in an almost ethereal light. If he didn't know any better he would think you weren't from this world, then again, maybe it wasn't that far fetched.

"Are you still awake?"

"Mmmh.."

"Nothing to worry about doll, just asking"

"𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘴𝘰..."

Your voice was already laced with sleep, unable to form a complete sentence but luckily still able to process what he was saying.

"Do you remember the first time we met?"

"𝘚𝘶𝘳𝘦.."

"That time I told you that one day I'd tell you a secret, the most important one... to me at least"

"𝘎𝘰 𝘰𝘯... 𝘐𝘮𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘧𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸"

"Sure sure but for how much of a secret it is you probably have already figured it out..."

Silence.

You were probably sleeping now.

"𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘐 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘸𝘦 𝘮𝘦𝘵... 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘰𝘯 𝘥𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘦"

You might be sleeping but even if you didn't hear his words just now he was sure you would be hearing them again when he'd finally find the courage to ask you to marry him... even if in his own way.

#twst #twst x reader #fellow honest #fellow x reader #fellow honest x reader #ferro twst #fellow twst #honest x reader #idk how to tag this #fluff #twst fanfic

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