#this is shiiiiit and i apologize

[blackholedjester]

i love being friends with creatives/writers/artists because on one hand i'm helping them develop by spitballing my dumbassary at them and asking endless questions that one would not usually consider

but on the other hand the big bad for a friend's in-development story has existed in concept for all of a day and has a singular piece of art made, and it's of me disturbing him by saying "kinky"

[oorevitcejda]

what the hell is going on why are there so many shitty fake apologies everywhere

[goldsainz]

❝ WE’D BE A BIG CONVERSATION ❞

MASTERLIST!

pairing . . . carlos sainz x leclerc!reader

◦∘｡ﾟ. request . . . “Carlos x Leclerc!reader and how the media would react?🤭 ❤️”

◦∘｡ﾟ. summary . . . even if the world can’t make up its mind about you, you’ll still be endgame.

◦∘｡ﾟ. note . . . HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO TAY TAY!!! i had to make something at least related to her… although most of my fics are based on her songs so i owe her a lot for all the variety she has on her catalogue 💙 on another note, now that i’m back i gotta keep the fics coming so i hope to put one per week (don’t hold me to that). this is also soooo longggg im sorry😭

liked by lorenzotl, carlossainz55 and 207,843 others

yourusername living my spanish villa life

view all 1,609 comments

carlosfan1 carlos in the likes!!!!!

ynfan1 she’s the love of my life

charles_leclerc Trop belle ❤️

liked by yourusername and 26,139 others

arthur_leclerc Why are you in spain?

arthur_leclerc Come back to Monaco

⤷ yourusername no

⤷ arthur_leclerc I’m telling maman

⤷ yourusername go right ahead, i’ll tell her all about those plates that suddenly disappeared

⤷ arthur_leclerc Truce…?

⤷ yourusername yayyy

ynfan2 crying at arthur being clingy😭

user1 girl it’s the middle of august aren’t you sweating your skin off?

⤷ yourusername beauty is pain ❤️

⤷ ynfan3 LMFAO

liked by landonorris, reyesvdec and 1,283,059 others

carlossainz55 Summer 💛

view all 19,245 comments

carlosfan21 trying not to freak tf out rn…

anasainzvdec Que veranillo 🙌

liked by carlossainz55, yourusername and 71,024 others

carlosfan22 WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK

ynfan21 why did y/n like carlos sister’s comment🤨

⤷ carlosfan23 she did what?!?!

⤷ ynfan21 she unliked it a while after… but i screenshotted it cause it was so weird

⤷ ynfan22 this + him liking y/n’s latest post is giving soft-launch

carlosfan24 expected silly season, got love season

carlosfan25 patiently waiting for the f1 detectives to uncover who that is 😁

ynfan23 THAT IS SO Y/N

ynfan24 i’d like to issue out an apology for how annoying i’ll be if that is in fact y/n

⤷ carlosfan26 me too

⤷ pierregasly Me three

⤷ ynfan24 WHAT??? PIERRE???

⤷ francisca.cgomes pierregasly that is not your burner…

⤷ pierregasly Shiiiiit

⤷ ynfan25 there’s a lot to unpack here😭

yourusername updates their instagram stories!

francisca.cgomes responded to you story!

francisca.cgomes you’re in italy rn 🤨

yourusername i knowwww

francisca.cgomes so why aren’t you enjoying

yourusername cause charles and arthur and lorenzo are hovering over my shoulder like im gonna blow up the ferrari motorhome which mean i can’t see my mannnn😫

francisca.cgomes pierre can take care of charles, and then i’ll ask charlotte if she can distract lorenzo… maybe you can talk to carla so she’ll keep arthur busy?

yourusername I LOVE YOU! YOU’RE A LIFESAVER!

francisca.cgomes you can thank me later!!! go see carlos while you can

yourusername right okay bye bye

francisca.cgomes 😘

liked by lailahasanovic, olliebearman and 297,150 others

yourusername italy you were amazing!!!!!

view all 4,457 comments

ynfan31 HELLO???????

ynfan32 did not expect this when i opened insta

carlosfan31 oh.

arthur_leclerc Answer my calls

arthur_leclerc Don’t ignore us, Y/N

charles_leclerc ???

lorenzotl Interesting

user31 where’s the jacket from?

⤷ yourusername bershka 🩵

⤷ ynfan33 BYE NOT HER IGNORING HER BROTHERS

carlosfan32 okay but what does lorenzo know why is he so chill 🤨

ynfan34 it’s giving ferrari royalty

ynfan35 the way her eyes were glowing while watching carlos on the podium… they’re in love IN LOVE

carlosfan33 HOW DOES IT FEEL TO LIVE MY DREAMMM

yourusername updated their instagram stories!

liked by yourusername, lewishamilton and 1,783,902others

carlossainz55 Singapore you’ll forever be in my memory

view all 26,758 comments

yourusername mi amorrrr

yourusername winner of singapore and my heart

⤷ carlossainz55 Mi corazón es todo tuyo también ❤️

yourusername 🫠🫠🫠

carlosfan41 they’re so endgame coded

⤷ ynfan41 so reputation coded in general

carlosfan42 y/n is so me thirsting over carlos

carlosfan43 god i’ve seen what you’ve done for others

ynfan42 why does it feel like charles and arthur are so detached from y/n lately???

⤷ carlosfan44 OMG YES I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO SAY THIS

⤷ carlosfan45 i think since monza we’ve had no content with them… we went from silly stories to radio silence

scuderiaferrari ❤️🍾

liked by carlossainz55 and 68,035 others

ynfan43 these are my parents now

ynfan44 this is everything to me!!!!!!!

carlosfan46 singapore will forever be in my memory too 🥹

translations:

— mi amorrrr : my loveeee — Mi corazón es todo tuyo también : My heart is all yours too

-ˋˏ *.· taglist . . . @lorarri @lpab @noncannonships @lunnnix @elliegrey2803 @schumacheer @saintslewis @leoramage @toomuchdelusion @anthonykatebridgerton @enhacolor @gulabjamoon @toomuchdelusion @goldenalbon @ravisinghs-wife @nouvellevqgue @hobiismyhopeu @celestialpato @lecsainz @kkeels @darleneslane @avengersheart

[astridthevalkyrie]

chand ko chakor dekhe, tujkho naseebo wala (the bird looks at the moon, a lucky one looks at you) | hawks x reader | chapter 6

“You’ve died twice? From clocks? “I know you’re not blind to the rocks and debris flying literally everywhere! The world would be better off without you in it!” you scream at the villain. The machine is even louder as it breaks and jams into the ground. “Flying building pieces or something, I don’t know—one hit me yesterday. The first day I got knocked into a wall, and then I woke up hugging my body pillow. Same thing the next day. And the next, and the next. Did my number three pro hero partner save me? No, he let me get stuck in a fucking time loop!” Or, you’ll do a lot of things with infinite time on your hands, but falling in love with Keigo Takami isn’t one of them.

a/n: yesssss update's out have a fun time reading!

warnings: suicide attempts (with the understanding that she will reset), hawks pins reader to a building, rudeness, icky romantic stuff 🤮

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

“Whoa.” Your hands come up in front of your chest as the kid’s arm crackles—crackles?—with lightning. “Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa hang on, I don’t fight children!”

You don’t think the nerd hears you, because he’s jumping forward with wide, fearful, despaired eyes. “Detroit”—of course he’s an All Might copycat, USA lover, star spangled stripes, would still smash their number one hero, though more like she’d smash you because she’s super strong—”SMAAASH!”

Fuck your life. Truly.

—————————————————

You go back to the beach the next today. Not to kill All Might again, even if you did cheat and break the vow you’d made to yourself the first day you officially started training to be a hero (haha your soul is broken you’re going to hell except you’re not because you’re stuck in a time loop and ohmygosh maybe this is hell maybe when you got hit by the rock that first day you died what the shiiiiit). No no, you won’t kill him again, because you’re just far more interested in who this tiny little green loser is and just how he KOed you with one punch.

That’s not, like, easy. You killed the top ten heroes minus the dumb bird! By right of passage, that makes you the number one! Or at least the number two if Hawks is de facto one even though he totally isn’t. He admitted MULTIPLE times that he would have just let you kill him. Who needs a flimsy number one hero like that?

Speaking of flimsy number one heroes.

You’re probably losing your mind more than you thought. Why are you looking at a chibi version of All Might?

Goddamn are heroes stupid! You’re perched up just barely out of view and neither the LITERAL NUMBER ONE or his protege have noticed you as they eat and yap about CLASSES of all things!

Okay, so when you killed All Might, he wasn’t exactly himself because he hasn’t had his Snickers bar yet or whatever. Which means you didn’t really kill the number one, and so the right of passage still leaves you at number two (yeah yeah, de facto Hawks number two, then you). 

So if Small Might (good one! that’s original!) can’t fight you, that would mean the real foe you’d need to defeat is YOUNG MIDRORIYA! Only problem is that YOUNG MIDORIYA! is a child and y’know, you’re not quite that comfortable in your amorality yet. Already you feel queasy every time you think about the way you killed LightMight. 

Still, one doesn’t just go around California Cabana-ing every single person they see, so when YOUNG MIDORIYA! starts walking back to whichever hovel he crawled out of, you follow him until you see someone trip in front of him, large drink in their hands. 

What would have soaked his shirt now completely coats his face with just a liiiiitle bit of wind.

Respect your elders, kid. You’ll never be the next Mini Might with that attitude. Although, that isn’t any reason to apologize that profusely to the lady that spilled the drink. No, there’s no need to buy her a new drink either, your face got soaked, not her’s, she was the one not looking where she was going. OFFERING AN AUTOGRAPH FROM ERASERHEAD? HUH? DID SHE LOSE HER DRINK OR DID SHE LOSE HER WHOLE GODDAMN FAMILY?

Oh, she doesn’t even know who Eraserhead is. Ha. That’s right, walk home with your sorry little green head all wet. That’ll teach you not to bribe civilians.

—————————————————

The next day, you wake up, ignore Hawks’ text first thing in the morning, open your window and jump out. Then you wake up in your bed again, and repeat. Repeat. Repeat. It’s entertaining for all of six minutes before the nothingness and despair becomes passionless.

What’s left? What more is there?

Well, it was kinda fun taking Ryukyu up to space (no it wasn’t?). You could try that again. Opening the window, you go up this time, instead of down.

Today, you’ll try to reach the sun.

First, you’re shot by someone who must think you were a stray bird. First, rude. Second, still illegal. Rot in jail. You love being a pro hero, the police do whatever you say with overt rudeness but begrudging submission. 

Second, you look into the sun too long and uh. Die. That one’s embarrassing.

Third, claws dig into your hips and yank you down. 

“Hey!” You scratch at the hands assisting gravity in bringing you closer to the ground. “What the hell, what are you doing? You never get here this early!”

“What are you doing? Where are you even going?”

“I will kick you in the balls if you don’t let me go, you dumb shit!”

“You’re so nice,” Hawks drawls, and his legs wrap around yours too, one arm around your front to pin your arms to the side. Now it’s only his wings keeping you afloat, his air giving you flight. It infuriates you, appealing muscles aside. “Someone just took a picture of us, by the way. Have fun explaining that one.”

You growl as fiercely as humanly possible, wriggling in his grasp. “Stupid stupid stupid bird impedes justice, gets murdered for it.”

“Too wordy for a hashtag.”

“Okay, how’s about—” It makes your chest hurt when you do it, but you suck in wind towards you using your own breath, and shoot it down to throw his arms away from you. “Hashtag I Did Hawks’ Dad!”

His wings flap as he falls, but he catches himself in no time. You’re propelling back up already, clouds not even within touching distance yet. Not that you wanna touch them. They’re really cold. Might as well touch Endeavor’s heart while you’re at it.

“For your information.” His nails graze your nape this time, and he grips the back of your uniform. With a grunt, he pulls you back again, too strong for those weak birdy bones. You shoot downwards, gasping. “That would make you a criminal fucker.”

You’re sideways, hair twisting in strange ways as you glare up at him. His wings expand impressively, blocking the sun and giving you a good look at a world of crimson gold. 

“Sorry about your dirtbag father. Can you get out of the fucking way?”

Hawks holds up a finger with a condescending look, pointing to his right, then his left. “See these? These are legitimate directions to fly in. Up is nothing. Up doesn’t have anything for you.”

“You’re a fake friend,” you spit, jetting up with a fist raised. 

He blocks, immediately raising his leg to kick you, but you saw that move coming because sometimes you watch his fight compilations for entertainment (and his compilations in real life too, duh). His foot connects with your arm, and the sunlight gleams in his visor. “Is that so? Elaborate for me.”

“Do you know how fucking bored I am? Do you have any idea how much I hate every single fucking person on this planet?”

You land a square hit on his chest; the victory is short lived. Feathers sneak into your sleeves and pull you down, ignoring your kicking and screaming.

“Who could you possibly hate?” he sings.

“You, for starters, winged piece of shit! And Endeavor, yeah, that’s right, dickrider. Cry about it. I hate All Might too—did you know he’s a fraud? And his stupid ass sidekick, or ex boyfriend, or whatever, I paid him a visit and every time he’s about to tell me my future I end up dying, because life hates me just as much as I hate life! I’m not even allowed to know how I go out! Ryuku and Best Jeanist think they can appeal to my better nature, well, I DON’T HAVE ONE! Oh, I hope you get to marry someone someday, Hawks, and I hope they cheat on you and take all your money.”

It might look like you’re flailing, but you’re not. You’re just trying to air out your own clothes to get the feathers out. The man who had taken a picture of you is not full on recording the fight you and Hawks are having.

You flash him two matching middle fingers. 

“Stop it,” Hawks snarls, apparently fed up now (one word against Endeavor and Fanboy Hawks comes out to play). “That shit’ll go viral, you know it will.”

“Sorry to ruin your perfect image, golden boy.” You finally rip the last feather out of your sleeve, biting it in half and spitting it out just to spite him. “Kiss my ass—fuck!”

You’re pinned. Fully against the building. The feathers aren’t under your clothes, they don’t need to be. They connect with each other to form a link that pins your ankles and wrists individually and before you can suck in any air a few more stuff into your mouth as a makeshift gag. Upside down. “I’m not worried about my image, songbird. Your popularity rating is at an all time low lately.”

Because you don’t pose for posers the way he does. And also maybe how not child friendly you are in interviews. Maaaybe because most of the other heroes don’t even like you enough to team up with you.

Not! That! It! Matters!

Hawks can read you well enough from your eyes. He maneuvers his body upside down to look at you face up, and looks into your gaze with a slight quirk of his lips. “What’s the matter, Nightingale? You hate hero society all of a sudden?”

NO SHIT.

“You wanna skip patrol today?”

NO.

“Why not?”

WE’LL BE CALLED TO FIGHT CLOCKINTHEHOLE ANYWAY AND IF WE DON’T GET THERE IN TIME PEOPLE GET INJURED AND YOU GET ALL SAD FOR THE REST OF THE DAY.

“Sorry, gonna need your mouth to transcribe that one.” The gag is lifted and before you can scream he covers your mouth with his hand, “Hey,” he coos, looking like his hair is flying up, “I’m serious. We can skip patrol, or I can do it on my own. I’ll cover for you, no problem.”

“Dude,” you choke, and the wetness running up your temple makes you realize you’re crying, “I wanna die.”

His face changes immediately, dropping every bit of his persona in an instant. The feathers loosen and release you, dropping you, and he catches you bridal style before you can turn on Aerial. 

“Alright, hang on.” His face is pained as he nudges your window open, carrying you in. “Hang on.”

The blood rushes back to your head, and the tears fall normally. He places you against your headboard, right next to the body pillow you always wake up next to. The sight of it makes you cry harder.

“Hey, hey.” Just like he did every time you tried to manipulate fighting tactics out of him to use against Endeavor, Hawks’ thumbs come up to brush your tears away. He sits at the edge of your bed, as though he’s visiting you in the hospital. “Hey, pretty girl, c’mon. Talk to me. Tell me everything. Let me help you.”

Your hands tangle in your own hair and your eyes shut, looking every bit the crazy lady you’ve become. “I want to fly into the sun. Please, just let me do that.”

“I can’t,” he pleads, taking his visor off and setting it aside. His jacket goes next, and he drapes it over you like the two of you aren’t indoors. And not on a date. He’s watched one too many cheesy romcoms. His favorite is John Tucker Must Die. You think that’s because he has mommy issues.

“I can’t,” he repeats, nudging himself next to you and moving your hands from your hair to your lap. His own hands go up to pat your hair down, and brush your shoulders, touch as light as a feather. 

He’s grooming you. Dumb bird. 

A painful sob escapes you, and you fall into him as he rubs your arms, your back, your hair. His bodysuit quickly becomes wet with your tears, but he doesn’t seem to mind, lips on your temple and arms tight around you. He even leans down and kisses a tear straight off your cheek.

“I’ve been living the same day again and again. I’ve lost count of the days. I killed people and I manipulated you and you keep helping me but nothing works. Everyday I have to go through this. Everyday the universe finds a way to kill me. I haven’t—” Your own wail cuts you off, and he squeezes you closer. “I haven’t seen nighttime in forever! I’ll forget what nighttime looks like soon, I’m so sick of the sun!”

He doesn’t say anything. Sometimes he believes you straight away, sometimes he doesn’t, but either way he eventually takes it in stride. He cheers you up. He takes you places or he talks and talks and talks until you’re laughing, laughing so hard you almost don’t feel the pain when you die.

His lips burn on your skin. He keeps them on your temple, warming you far more than his jacket does. 

“I hate telling you this every time,” you sniff, “I wish there was a way I could fast forward it.”

Still, he doesn’t talk. He moves instead, holding you to his heart like you’re.

Gold.

When Hawks does speak, his voice is thicker than normal, like he’s holding back something. Tears of his own, or a confession. Too many times he’s seen you vulnerable now, even if he doesn’t remember, and you don’t think you’ll ever see him in such a state. 

“If you wanna fly into the sun, I won’t stop you.”

You look at him. No hint of a lie in those golden eyes. Pulling away from the safety you’d embraced for a second, you sit back and swallow. “Yeah? No lie?”

“No lie. You’ll come back, right? The day will reset. So it’s okay.”

“Yeah.” Unless today is finally the last day. But you doubt it. You’ll know when it is. If it ever comes.

“Then you can go. Or…”

A few minutes ago, you’d have jumped out the window the second he stopped holding you back. “Or?”

“Or.” His tongue pokes into the side of his cheek. Thinking face. One of the few people who doesn’t have a dumb thinking face. This one actually looks like he’s thinking. “You let me take you somewhere.”

“Where?”

“Surprise,” he says softly, “you’ll like it. Promise.”

And you figure you can always fly into the sun tomorrow. The giant ass star isn’t going anywhere.

—————————————————

He’s had a hand over your eyes for a couple minutes now, guiding you inside…somewhere. Every few seconds he makes a shushing sound, to who you assume are bystanders wondering why the rude hero who trended number one on Twitter this morning (#FrightingaleBreakdown) is wandering around.

“Are you taking me to a strip club?” you ask suddenly. “I really don’t wanna go to a strip club right now.”

“No, but that’s a good idea. Tell me that one later. Or, tomorrow, or whatever. Whenever you want.”

Yeah. Okay.

A door closes, and that’s when he finally moves his hand. You’d assumed you would have to shield your eyes from some ceiling light. But instead, you’re met by even more darkness.

Well. Not total darkness.

There’s a hint of white. A sliver of silver. And it’s everywhere.

You honesttoGod gasp, staggering back as you witness the night sky. The stars twinkle like shiny teeth (that sparkle, adding beauty to my faaaace, my shiny teeth that glisten, just like a christmas tree, you know they’d walk a mile, just to see me smile (woo!) my shiny teeth and me). Your hands tremble as they close over your mouth, and you don’t realize that you’re tearing up until Hawks’ fingers are under your eyes again, catching the tears before they can fall.

“I know a planetarium isn’t the same as the actual night.” He glows like this, how does one do that? What’s his skincare routine? “But…it’s better than nothing, and I’ll bring you here whenever you want. You say the word to me and we’re here. Or anywhere else. If you can’t get out of the loop, then you should take advantage of it. Have fun. Do things you’ve never had time to do before. I’ll help you.”

For all this trouble, you should stare up at the faux sky, not at him.

“And um, to speed up the process.” His cheeks dust pink, and he whispers, “Keigo.”

That’s when you find your voice. “What?”

“Keigo. My name. I’ve never told anyone, so, you know. I’ll believe you faster.” His face is red now, all the way up to the tips of his prickly ears. 

“Kei-go.” You test it out on your tongue, eyes on him. “Well, what if I’m just messing with you and I’m not actually reliving today?”

He exhales in a way that tells you the thought didn’t even cross his mind. As if you’re sooo goodhearted you would never do such a thing. But you absolutely would.

“It’d be worth it.” Hawks—Keigo—shrugs. “To hear you say my name.”

Oh.

You step forward, you think, to kiss him, but before you get the chance the ground shakes, and then crumbles directly under your feet. You don’t even hear his cry of surprise. Is this an earthquake? No, quicksand? But that makes no sense—except the curse doesn’t make any sense at all, so yeah. Sure. You’ll go out like that.

You wake up with the taste of sand and good sense never to try and kiss your partner again. 

—————————————————

“You’re early!” Hawks greets you at patrol.

“Yeah, well.” You sigh, blowing into the cup of hot tea in your hand. “We don’t all take our time like you, Keigo.”

[nianeyna]

I kept a bullet-pointed liveblog in a notes document as I played the new ffxiv expansion. now I have finally finished the story so I can share with the class without fear of someone responding to me with spoilers. speaking of which everything below is dawntrail spoilers, for the entire expansion, in case that wasn't clear.

⬇️ SPOILERS. FINAL FANTASY XIV DAWNTRAIL SPOILERS BELOW. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED ⬇️

Dawntrail Liveblog

- ok so the mean claimants are obviously not going to win, but catboy promise is a dark horse. also not ruling out "nobody wins"

- Urqopacha is super cute

- CAMPFIRE SCENE!

- Erenville's deal continues to be very mysterious no matter how much he contrives to appear to be telling us about it

- lol Erenville dialog: "I spoke too much" YOU BARELY SAID ANYTHING BABE

- Kozama-uka is sooooo pretty

- I like how the entire first dungeon was totally unnecessary since we would have got there FASTER if we'd just stuck around and helped Alisaie and Erenville repair the boat lmao. but that's not how the WoL does things!!

- CAMPFIRE SCENE!

- erenville lurking in the background... siddown boy lmao

- unknown dude: hey you uh... forgot something. yeah back there. come with me and get it this is definitely not a trap

- oh no it was a trap! who could possibly have predicted this??

- awwww, Koana. wasn't sure about him at first but he's just a cute little muffin isn't he

- wuk lamat getting all excited about eating the xibruq pibil was so cute omg. she just likes food!!! I appreciate that in a woman

- oh shiiiiit wuk lamat origin story?! dun dun dun...

- aaaaaand solo duty... ulp

- haha get wrekt

- CAMPFIRE SCENE!

- the mamool ja should look into tourism... this place is pretty as hell

- ok koana shooting the tablet was a pretty cool move

- have my doubts about the golden city being in yak tel... like if it was there why'd they go to xak tural then

- ok, I guess it... was there? or... the *entrance* was there... according to gulool ja ja, anyway...

- road trip alone with erenville be still my heart!

- out of context erenville quotes: "this is your first time, so let's take it slow"

- no need to apologize erenville... you can drag me into anything you want

- oh wow this is really fucking sad. wow. I wasn't expecting that!

- the ridiculous train plan is cheering me up a bit thank god (editor's note: it didn't last)

- sigh... there always has to be at least one zone per expansion that's all dark and gross-looking. did they sign a contract to that effect or something??

- I can't believe how mean this plotline is to erenville

- this is fucked up... this is so fucked up

- npc: "sorry to darken the mood" NO THAT'S FINE I DON'T THINK THE MOOD CAN GET ANY WORSE!!

- I want to rip Spene's crown off and push her off a cliff. her little I'm so cute and innocent and helpless act makes me want to puke.

- CAMPFIRE SCENE!

- if any more parents die in this story I am really truly gonna lose it

- YES finally we get to fight these horrible people. machine army. whatever.

- I hope the next trial is sphene... I want to kick sphene's ass SO bad

- well there goes otis which brings the fucking dead parent toll to at least 4

- finallyyyyyy made it out of heritage found... *collapses onto the floor of tuliyollal like a shipwrecked sailor reaching land*

- (ok obviously I've technically been back to tuliyollal while I've been doing these godforsaken quests but THIS IS DIFFERENT!)

- we didn't fight sphene but the prospects are looking really good for me getting to punch her in the face soon. probably not literally like we got to do with zenos, but I guess you can't have everything :(

- wow sphene really BELIEVES she's just a helpless little girl. fucking incredible.

- next expansion let's have a final zone NOT populated entirely by ghosts. change it up a little

- so should I count namikka and cahciua's deaths twice on the parent death toll scoreboard or what

- you know what I still don't get. is why the yok huy went to xak tural to look for the golden city. *why did they think it was there*? I mean heritage found is there *now* but it definitely wasn't hundreds of years ago!

- that face on the tower looks more like meteion than sphene tbh

- two more dead parents!

- I can't. believe. sphene erased herself before I could beat her ass. this is the most unfair thing that has happened in this expansion, and it is up against some STRONG contenders

- it's just not satisfying to pummel a weird robot that has none of her memories!

- oh sphene's SORRY? *loudest fart noise ever*

- it's a good thing wuk lamat is here to be nice cause if I had to do it I'd throw up

- "their lives remain unchanged"? uh.... we shut off the afterlife. which was a real physical place you could go to. I feel like that changes things a bit!

- I DID IT I'M OUT CREDITS ROLLED UP I'M DONE THANK GOD

First half I rate: 9/10

Second half I rate: 3/10

Overall I rate this expansion: 5/10 I guess

Up until the lightning dome appeared I was having a blast. after that the gameplay experience became one of gritting my teeth so I could get out and be done with it. all the alexandrian zones are dark and unpleasant to be in, which would have been bearable except the plot was literally nightmarish and any new characters I didn't hate either died or were already dead (except gulool ja, who's cute of course, but his story was still pretty upsetting in a different way). This is not to say the writing was bad, because I don't think it was. In the alternate universe where I was LOOKING for a tragic existential horror game I might have even really liked it. However I really really wasn't looking for that at all, so in the real world I feel pretty betrayed and upset. There's a line between "plot twist" and "false advertising" and I think they left it behind in the dust.

But hell, at least we got 4 campfire scenes.

[what-gs-watching]

"And I can guarantee you, it will be a night to remember."

Okay. I’m getting my wit’s about me. Sort of.  It’s a process. But it’s also probably why I’m about to go all Charlie from It’s Always Sunny with his crazy conspiracy board (seriously though, this took me three days to write) about Good Omens episode 4. Because y’all, it’s the 1941 episode. And there’s sooo much going on. Pivotal, heart wrenching shit. 

The most important of the ‘present’ stuff happens in the opener, of course. Aziraphale is driving back from his fun little romp in Edinburgh when he sees a hitchhiker on the road, but he’s resolute in not stopping, he’s trying to get home to Crowley. Only after he sees the hitcher a few times and almost hits them does he relent, and guess who climbs in the car - Shax. 

She knows who he is, she starts talking about the Bentley and wondering why it had never been upgraded. She wants information from Az, she insists that Crowley is hiding Gabriel and we all know he’s not a good liar, but he does his best. At one point she says she’s confused as to why Crowley would risk destruction for Aziraphale, she says “you don’t seem his type at all.”

Michael Sheen, sweet sweet Michael Sheen and his mastery of facial expressions, just tips Aziraphale’s eyebrows, just a bit, just perfectly so. You can hear him thinking ‘giiiiiirl you don’t know shiiiiit’ and. I. love it.

She also says “I remember 80, 90 years ago hearing that you and Crowley were an item, didn’t believe it then….” and she’s trying to mess with his mind. He again tells her that Crowley isn’t with Gabriel and he doesn’t know where Gabriel is. She asks him to let her out in the middle of nowhere, says he’s already told her where Gabriel really is, and when he gets all huffy asking how he’d done that, she says “You didn’t, you have now.”

Truth be told, I am not a huge fan of Shax. She’s the one pushing this entire situation, I mean sure Beezlebub says she wants to find Gabriel but Shax is a bootlicker and she’s ratcheting the entire thing up to 11. In an extremely annoying, fumbling way. Always so fumbling.

Whatever, though,  it’s fine. We need to dig into the past. 

Of course we all remember the 1941 scene in the first season. And, if we’re clocking our timeline right, 1941 is the first time (that we know of) that Aziraphale and Crowley see each other after their dustup in the 1860’s. When Crowley asked for holy water. And Aziraphale outright refused, not wanting to provide a suicide pill. When Azirphale said they were ‘fraternizing’ and Crowley was incredulous about it, an argument ending with both of them insisting they didn’t actually need the other one.

So like 80-ish years in between, right? But then Crowley literally hot-steps into a church because Aziraphale is playing spy games that he doesn’t understand.

My theory? After their little tiff, Crowley realized pretty quickly he’d gone too far (too fast) with Aziraphale, my dude doesn’t have anyone else to fraternize with, let’s face it, and he missed Az. I have to assume he’s had low-level Aziraphale detection since they met (alright, maybe it’s not so low-level, I’m sure it’s jacked up as fucking high as it can GO), so he just had to bide his time and wait for sweet little Az to get into one of his rescuing situations, because he so loves being rescued, and it would allow Crowley to apologize in his own way. You know, instead of actually explaining why he needs the holy water in the first place. 

Baby girl had to have had a plan in mind, because the entire story after the church burning? Hard ‘doting boyfriend’ vibes. He was gonna make Aziraphale want to be friends again. The internet seems to think that when Crowley saved Aziraphale’s books from the bomb, that’s when he realized he was in love with a demon, and that could be - and if it was, the rest of the night absolutely solidifies it, with the way Crowley comes for him. All of the heart eyes, all of the squealing.

So, they escape from the church. And then we see the three German idiots in hell, being processed by Furfur, who, it had been established prior, wanted to get out of his shit desk job and into something better. Fucking Shax of course, tells him to be on the lookout for any good information and to bring it to her, she’ll help him out. She’s the worst.

The Germans of course say they don’t belong there, their plans were cocked up by someone named Crowley and his friend and Furfur puts it all together. So he tells them they can go back to earth and be free of hell’s grip if they help him find proof that Crowley and Az are working together. After our favorite two have driven off, we see the Germans reanimating, and eating a drifter’s brain for good measure.

In the Bentley, (everytime I hear Crowley say “lift home?” in the scene before all nonchalant, my brain breaks a little) Aziraphale is still gripping his books and he tells Crowley he did a very nice thing and then says “there must be something I can do for you in return…” and I enjoy the implications y’all have assigned to this little exchange. We all love suggestive, dark horse Aziraphale.

It blows (haha I’m sorry) past Crowley though, and he takes them to a theater in the West End so he can deliver some bootleg booze, which of course turns out to have been shattered in the bomb drop. The theater owner is livid about it, and distraught over losing her magician for the night and immediately Aziraphale offers his services in ‘prestidigitation’. Because of course he thinks he’s a magician. That’s so Aziraphale.

Back at the bookshop Az is aflutter at this opportunity and Crowley thanks him for getting him off the hook, to which Az replies a little hesitantly “that’s what friends are for.” Clearly he’s also feeling bad about their last interaction and he’s trying to make up for that, and the church rescue all at the same time. But I have to assume he’s terrible at magic and I think Crowley does too but again, he’s all in on being a doting boyfriend. Both of them are working so hard to get back to a good balance with each other.

Crowley sits and lets Az practice some close-up tricks on him and he does a terrible American accent pretending to be an audience member. He encourages Aziraphale so delicately while suggesting he needs some bigger, better tricks for the show. He isn’t mocking him, he isn’t condescending, just supportive. When Crowley says they should buy a trick and Aziraphale insists the shop is for professionals only, the way he says “You, my Nefertiti fooling fellow, are about to perform on the West End Stage. If that doesn't make you a professional conjurer, I don't know what does” is loving, with only the slightest tinge of amusement. 

At the magic shop, the two poke around, while being followed by German zombies, and Crowley picks up a trick that the shop owner opens, covering them both in confetti. There’s a meme out there with this gif that just says :excited demon noises: and that’s exactly it. He’s so tickled the entire time. 

Meanwhile, the shop owner tries to suggest amateur tricks to Az but he’s not having it and his eyes fall on something called the ‘bullet catch’ which requires a rifle, and as we find out, a trusted confidant with a steady hand that Aziraphale has to really trust because a handful of people have died attempting it. 

So he pulls Crowley aside after saying “I’ve got the perfect man for the job” and he swears he’ll do all the tricky bits, all Crowley has to do is fire the gun. He’s so excited and sure of himself and he assumes Crowley has plenty of experience with firearms and Crowley agrees to do it, sticks his hand out for a shake but Aziraphale grabs it with both hands and glows and wiggles and shakes vigorously. It’s another fun little adventure for Aziraphale.

They get a little manual that’s supposed to explain the trick and off they go to the show because who needs to know how to actually do it, they’ve got miracles. They’ll be fine. 

The zombies follow of course, and take up in the back of the theater and then summon Furfur. Aziraphale’s magician name is “Fell the Marvelous” and they give him a ridiculous intro and he slinks onto the stage and he’s so nervous, it’s sweet. Az is really all in on the human experience - he took magic lessons and he wants to be so good at it that he just dives in without really thinking it through. 

He asks for a volunteer from the audience, indicating he needs a marksman, and all the hands go up except for Crowley, which is very on brand. He’s sweet boyfriend right now, but he’s nervous and yet, up to the stage he goes. Of course, in the background, Furfur has activated a miracle blocker so when Aziraphale tries to warm up the crowd by turning a turnip into an inkwell, it doesn’t work. He tries a few times, Crowley tries from the wings, and he realizes what’s happening. Kid pulls out the manual from his coat and frantically flips through it. They’re in actual danger. Ya know, like they do.

When he joins Aziraphale on the stage they both confirm their miracles aren’t working, but Az knows they need to plough ahead with the trick. He tells Crowley to load the gun and he looks a little unsure and confirms he hasn’t actually fired a gun, “not as such”. 

Meanwhile, as they pass the gun between themselves, Furfur takes a polaroid. 

The anxiety between them is palpable. Az instructs him that he’ll need to fire on Aziraphale’s signal. They stare each other down. Crowley aims at him clumsily, he’s supposed to aim for his mouth but shoot past his ear. Neither one of them bothered to learn the trick at all, whatsoever. And they’re in it. 

Aziraphale seems to mouth something. There’s a post out there from Neil Gaiman confirming the sweet summer child said “trust me”. 

So, he gives the signal. And in my mind Crowley maybe shuts his eyes a little bit and just goes for it. And it works, no one gets shots and Aziraphale pulls a bullet out of his mouth and the crowd goes wild. Furfur is disappointed, but it doesn’t matter, he got what he needed. 

Afterward, they’re in a dressing room and Az is absolutely tickled pink, he’s floating around with a boa and he asks Crowley if it really went well and he gets the affirmation that he needs. Az needs encouragement, all of the time, and it’s always all the better coming from Crowley. 

But their celebration is interrupted by Furfur, ready to have his own little moment. He introduces himself to Az and says he knows Crowley but Crowley truly seems not to recognize him whatsoever (which is the first time this happens in the season, but isn’t the last. Crowley has cobwebs y’all, and I know we are all curious as to where they came from). 

The point, he says, is that Crowley is in violation of the infernal code because he’s cavorting with an angel. He pulls out a little booklet that educates demons on angels of earth, open to Az’s page. The way he butchers Aziaphale’s name is wonderful, and gives Az the opportunity to correct him in a perfectly stern and authoritative way.

(Side note: if you blow up the page you can see that Az is classified as dangerous, and it says that if anyone runs into him, they shouldn’t approach and instead contact Crowley immediately. Boy has been protecting that sweet little angel's head for so long. But to be fair, he is potentially dangerous, guardian of the eastern gate, and all.)

Crowley tries to pass the whole thing off as coincidence but Furfur has the instruction manual for the trick, citing needing a “trusted stooge and confidant.” He tells them not to try anything funny because of the miracle blocker, and then he says to Crowley, “Shall we?”

The demon is unaffected though, he says “we shan’t” and he lays himself right out on the couch he’s been sitting on, covering his face with his hat. They don’t know about the photo of course, but each of them get a look at it and Furfur says Crowley can expect a legion to come for him in the morning, he should enjoy his last night on earth.

He then tells the zombies they’re free to go, but surprise! They’re gonna need to stay zombies. Hell’s deals are always trash. Don’t forget that, kids. 

Next thing we know, Furfur is back down, ready to show off his proof and get his promotion. Shax is looking on, interested, but when the envelope is opened, it’s just a flier for the girlie show, polaroid nowhere to be found. Our heroes have pulled one over on him. 

Back at the bookshop, Crowley is impressed with Aziraphale’s skills. He tries to recreate how he recovered the photo and swapped it, but of course he can’t. It worked when it mattered, and that’s all that matters. 

And then Aziraphale goes for it, he says “I knew you’d come through for me. You always do” and he’s using a quieter tone and it’s more of an acknowledgement of their relationship than Crowley’s gotten in a long time, maybe ever.  Crowley just says “well, you said trust me” and Aziraphale’s voice goes up a little bit and he says “and you did.” 

That’s the entire Arrangement, gang. They trust in each other that both will protect the fragile, whatever it is that they’ve forged, from everything. It’s not about helping out with the odd temptation or blessing, it’s about the fact that the only thing they have is each other. Which is why Aziraphale refused the holy water, and also why Crowley asked for it. 

True to his nature, Aziraphale insists that if Crowley was as evil as he says he was, he would have walked away from the trick, from the situation, but the demon says that you can’t just see things in black and white, you need to blur the edges. And Aziraphale actually agrees, he says there could be something said for shades of gray. Light gray, of course. And they just smile at each other.

SO my question is, all of this is lovely, right? They’re back to the two of them, whatever that might be, everything mostly worked out and Crowley thinks he’s successfully navigated their last fight and so does Az. Aziraphale is even starting to admit that maybe he could step out of the confines he’s trapped in (sometimes). 

But the next thing we know (from a timeline standpoint) is Aziraphale delivering a thermos full of holy water 20 some-odd years later and desperately saying “You go too fast for me, Crowley.” 

That poor angel spent twenty years thinking about 1941 and he’s got to be feeling guilty. Maybe he realized what the holy water could really be used for - after all, his love for human pageantry almost got Crowley dragged back to hell. Again. Like his need to do the holy thing had done in 1827. And his newfound interest in shades of gray could make everything even more dangerous. Especially with the way Crowley had treated him that night, the books and the trick and he never even tried to deny the compliments Az showered him with, and Aziraphale’s own feelings. 

So maybe it does make sense after all. Doting boyfriend was too much for him. I imagine him purposely avoiding Crowley at all costs through those years, until he could work up the nerve to deliver that thermos. He stepped out of his box ever so slightly and it almost ripped his only friend from him. All of the mini-sodes in this season are really about Aziraphale trying to get to gray (Crowley getting him there, so slowly, so patiently) and he does, and then it’s horrible somehow.

Do I now kind of want an entire season about the years between 1941 and 1967? Yes, obviously.

The point is, Aziraphale is still in his goddamn box throughout the season even though he’s more accepting of doting boyfriend as a general concept, and they’re still not fucking talking about any of it. Because that’s the Arrangement, and doing so would definitely skew more toward the dark shades Crowley prefers. 6,000 fucking years and the shade is still agonizingly light. It’s too light and y’all really need to find the correct hue and fast.

Because in the present, Shax gets authority to amass as many demons as possible, and attack the bookshop, that asshole. 

And Aziraphale returns home and Crowley thrusts a box of plants at him and coos to the Bentley about missing him and he asks how it went and Az unconvincingly says nothing weird happened at all but they aren’t hearing each other, they never ever hear each other properly.

 But, Crowley’s awning of a new age has failed, and so it’s Aziraphale’s turn to mess with human emotions that he doesn’t (quite) understand. Whickber Street Shopkeepers Association monthly meeting, here we come.

[redundant2]

I watched the Anderson Cooper 60 Minutes interview with Harry Markle - with transcript.

And I found this part very interesting.

I think the dog bowl Fight Club moment between William and Harry took place when William came to confront Harry about the reports of Harry and Meghan bullying staff. Harry's body language, facial expressions and chosen words are very interesting. I've cued up the video at the start of this segment.

Here's the transcript of this part of the interview:

"In early 2019, Harry writes that the rancor between William and him exploded at Harry's Cottage on the grounds of Kensington Palace.

AC: Your arguments with your brother became physical.

H: Um, it was a buildup of frustration, I think, on his part. It was at a time where he was being told certain things by people within his office and at the same time he was consuming a lot of the Tabloid press, a lot of the stories. And he had a few issues, which were based not on reality. And I was defending my wife and he was coming for my wife, she wasn't there at the time, but through the things that he was saying, I was defending myself and we moved from one room into the kitchen and his frustrations were growing and growing and growing. He was shouting at me, I was shouting back at him. It wasn't nice, it wasn't pleasant at all. And he snapped, and he pushed me to the floor.

AC: He knocked you over?

H: He knocked me over. Um, I landed on the dog bowl.

AC: You cut your back.

H: Yeah, I cut my back. I didn't know about it at the time but um, yeah. He apologized afterwards. It was a pretty nasty experience

AC: But he asked you not to tell anybody, not to tell Meghan.

H: Yeah, and I wouldn't have done. I didn't until she until she saw on my back. She goes, "What's that?" I was like, "Uh, what?" I actually didn't know what she was talking about. I looked in the mirror, I was like, (Mouths 'Ohhh shiiiiit!) Well, because I'd never, I hadn't seen it.

--End transcript--

Must not have been a very big or painful injury if he didn't notice it until his wife saw it. I mean, if you showered regularly, you'd probably feel the water hit the injury, or see it in the bathroom mirror, yes?

Watch Harry's face carefully when he says William " was being told certain things by people within his office and at the same time he was consuming a lot of the Tabloid press, a lot of the stories. And he had a few issues, which were based not on reality."

Look how his eyes dart, how he looks down, how he quickly glosses over what William came to discuss. He doesn't want to get into detail here, because the isue that started the brothers' confrontation does NOT make Harry and Meghan look very good.

Clearly William was confronting Harry about the bullying both Harry and Meghan were accused of doing. And Harry is trying to blame the tabloid press for influencing his brother's justified mistrust in Harry's wife. He can't for one second EVER consider that he or his wife might be accountable for their own actions, or that there is a possibility that they may have done something questionable. The blame always has to lie with someone else.

If one is charitable, one might think, "Ok, this guy isn't the brightest, and he's clearly been traumatized for his whole life about his mum dying and having to deal with his grief in the world spotlight." Then you add in the substance abuse, and the fact that he's clearly been excused and coddled and enabled his entire life. then you factor in the entrance of a woman who sees him as a walking wallet who she can manipulate to achieve her own fantasies of being a millionaire superstar - here you have the perfect witches' brew of a toxic trashcan fire of epic proportions.

This isn't going to end pretty.

[afreakingdork]

I’ll say this as calmly as I can…..

FUCKING YEEEEEEEES HOLY SHIIIIIT OH MI GOSH I- AHHHHH I GOT FUCKING BUTTERFLIES JUST FROM READING? YOURWRITINGISJUSTSOAMAZINGITNEVERSTOPSTOAMAZEME-

I- I apologise I am experiencing a normal amount of happiness-

Just- thank you😭💜👾

I'm giggling like crazy at your ask. I gotta dodge the flailing, but it's done out of happiness so I wouldn't have it any other way. Please never apologize for being happy! It's joy!

[torveela]

that feeling when you miss the first day of class because you just forgot??? im... 

[angelbrock]

dancing with the demons -she has an attitude?

au/summary: a mischievous 21year old girl dies from a crime she committed, finding her way and new journey to hell and warmly welcomed into the arms of the fallen angel.

warnings: swearing-sorta angst?

pairing: colby x fem!reader

masterlist

//

your point of view

i was talking to the girls, they explained some of the rules around here but apparently i’ll get to know all the rules with the devil himself. “you know, i refuse to believe that someone who is the devil has such an innocent name, colby, who would be afraid of that?” the girls laughed, giggling loudly, “no seriously! i always figured it would be lucifer.”

“nah, only in the bible.” kat shrugged off, “colby’s actual name is cole. but he hates being called that, i don’t know why tho.”

“yeah he never really told us the reason behind that, did he?” devyn asked rhetorically, katrina and tara nodding their heads.

“cole, maybe i’ll say that to piss him off.” i wriggled my eyebrows, smirking a little. “hey do you guys have any food, i’m so hungry.”

“uh duh, come on, follow me.” tara said, both of us getting up from our spot. i followed her as she said, “okay so we have many options, what would you like to have?”

“uhhh, holy shit you weren’t lying when you said there’s a variety.” i breathed out a small chuckle as she giggled. “i’ll have the..” i couldn’t choose, “shit, i don’t know.” i laughed.

tara laughed with me, “here, have these,” she grabbed a pack of chips, ‘hellfire potato chips’ very ironic. “they’re my favourite.” she threw them towards me, i caught it swiftly, nodding.

“the name of it sure sounds convincing.” she laughed yet again. “you go back to the girls, i’ll catch up to you. i’m gonna grab a drink,” she nodded, smiling before leaving. i was looking at the ingredients on the chip packet while walking towards the fridge, accidentally knocking into someone. “shit sorr- oh. it’s you.” i saw colby directly in front of me, shrugging him off.

“isn’t that the most polite way to greet someone.” he sarcastically stated, huffing. “what are you doing?”

“getting food, what does it look like?” i opened the fridge and bent down as i looked for drinks. i could practically feel his eyes staring at my ass. “stop staring, jackass.” i grabbed a can of beer before standing up straight, “you know,” i opened the can as i continued to speak, “i thought you people in hell don’t get hungry.”

“obviously we get hungry,” colby folded his arms, giving me an evil eye, “did you fail in history or something?” i rolled my eyes, taking a sip of the beer.

“history’s a joke. they never teach you what the truth actually is. they just add in positive information to make it sound like the world isn’t a horrible place.” i cocked my eyebrow, my statement definitely catching him off guard.

“wow, you’re actually smart?” he teased, “i didn’t figure you as the common sense type.”

“there’s a lot you don’t know about me-“ i started walking away, stopping for a second, “-cole.” i smirked as i said that, walking off before he could say anything.

i was suddenly startled by the girls squealing at my face, “that was so badass, holy shit.” katrina yelped.

“how did you not stutter once!” devyn continued on,

“girlll, that was firey hot.” tara finished off, i laughed as they all rambled. i shrugged,

“she must’ve learned from the best,” i furrowed my eyebrows, turning my head to see brennen. “sup, princess.” the girls all groaned, huffing. my face shriveled up into a cringe.

“don’t call me princess, i’m nobody’s princess.” i spat out, eating a chip. brennen smirked,

“you shouldn’t be talking to envy like that, sweetheart, you have no idea what i’m capable of.” he huskily spoke, the girls shivered in disgust before sitting back down, “plus,” he ran his hand up and down my arm, “what’s the worst that can happen if you got with m-“

i kicked him in the balls as hard as i could before he could even have the chance to finish. he groaned loudly, falling to his knees as he held his crotch in pain. “damn!” “ouch-” “holy shit that looked like it hurt.” sam, jake and corey called out right after the douche fell to the floor. 

“what the fuck is happening over here?” colby walked out, his deep voice intimidating everyone but me. “what the-”

“colby, you might want to control your fucking girl before i-” before brennen could finish, i kneed him in the jaw, causing him to groan in pain. 

“listen here, asshat,” i grabbed brennen by the collar, “i’m nobody’s fucking girl. stop speaking to me like that or i will crush your balls with my bare hands.” everyone laughed and ooed as soon as i finished. 

“shiiiiit, i think you’re the only chick that i’m afraid of other than tara.” jake chuckled out, i folded my arms, 

“who you calling chick?” honestly, i only said that to scare him. and it seemed to work. 

“alright, that’s enough of that.” colby huffed out, burning his eyes into mine. i stared at him just as intensely. he shut his eyes and rose his eyebrows before opening them again, “she has an attitude,” he looked at sam, who was smirking at colby, “fast learner, i see.” 

“is anyone going to help me?!” brennen groaned out in pain, we laughed, i brought my hand out for him to grab. he hesitantly grabbed it, i pulled him up. “thanks. you’re fucking crazy.” 

“crazy is my middle name.” the girls all giggled, cheering me on as i smirked evilly. where the fuck is this sudden attitude coming from, i still don’t understand.

“anyways, move along, everyone.” colby grit out, sending everyone away, “girls, do you mind if i speak to y/n alone?” the girls nodded before leaving, winking at  me. i looked at them weird before turning back around, gasping in surprise when i saw him standing directly in front of me. 

“can you not do that every time i turn around?” i sassily remarked, continuing to eat my chips. tara wasn’t lying, they were good. he rolled his eyes, 

“listen here, princess,” i clenched my jaw when he called me princess, he definitely did that on purpose. 

“stop calling me princess-” i angrily cut him off, suddenly i was pushed up against the wall, extremely roughly as he gripped my neck. i struggled to get out of his grasp.

“you may have had the guts to lay even a finger on brennen, but you need to realize the fact that i’m the fucking devil. you can’t hurt me even if you tried to. so watch your fucking mouth when you’re speaking to me.” his dark blue eyes boaring into mine, i looked up at him, since he was much taller than me.  

“whatever, if you want to kill me just fucking do it,” i spat back, bringing my face even closer to his, to where i could feel his breath hitting my lips, “i have no will to continue living.” i whispered. he flared his nostrils in anger, tightening his grip around my neck a little. 

“what are you doing to me, huh?” i didn’t even think it was possible, but he brought my face closer to his, the tip of our noses touching, my chest up against his. “who are you to make me feel like this?” his voice lowered even more, sounding slightly raspy sending shivers down my body.

“from what i’ve heard; i’m your queen to be.” he smirked slightly, i copied his expression. 

“to be my queen, there’s a lot of consequences. i still think you’re too much of a coward to face those.” he teasingly whispered.

“is that so?” i rose my eyebrows, he hummed, i brought my mouth towards his ear, “challenge accepted.” i whispered hotly as i escaped his grasp. i walked backwards to see his face, a large grin over my lips. his tongue was pressed against his cheek to hide his smirk.

this should be fun. 

A/N - hi loves! my apologies for taking so long to upload. i’m so glad you guys like the series so far. thank you so much for the feedback, i really appreciate it. <3 

signing off

-i

[missbunnycarrot]

K I S S & T E L L

C H A P T E R E L E V E N

"y/n! we are parked here!" you turned around to meet younghwan waving his arms at you.

aish. it's 4 in the morning.. it's cold.. my stomach is empty.. my body is not yet ready for the day.. you walked across the street to the parking lot with heavy feet and a mild mental breakdown.

"good morning manager-nim" you tried to sound enthusiastic as you can.

younghwan's lips tugged up in a small smile knowing how you must be struggling to adjust to this kind of work "good morning to you too y/n. don't you worry, you can go back to sleep in the van on the way to the venue." he pats your back. "by the way, i'll be driving the vocal unit's van," he then pulled another person in the conversation "you will be with him, lee dongro. he is the hiphop unit's road manager."

"안녕하세요(hello) nice to meet you." you bowed at your new acquaintance. "안녕하세요(hello) so you're y/n. it's nice to finally meet you in person," his eyes curved behind his glasses.

"okay! let's start moving people!" younghwan shouted. "가자(let's go)!!" dk cheered and the rest cheered back in synch.

dongro slid the van's door for you, "감사 해요(thank you)" you smiled at him. you then faced the people inside the van "hey boys" you winked at them. "졸려 (sleepy)?" s.coups smiled at you. "because you look like you are y/n," mingyu swiped his palm over your eyes teasing you in which you returned with a death glare.

you hopped in the van scooting beside vernon at the very back. "i hope you guys don't mind, but i still have a dream to attend to," you announced that made vernon giggle his dorky laugh at you.

you were almost dozing off when the hiphop unit started to dig in their breakfast. oh shiiiiit~ that smell so goooood~ then your stomach rumbled. the boys looked at you, "sorry, was i making too much noise" you apologized with one eye open. "noona, you haven't eaten yet?" vernon faced you which only made you crave more of their breakfast. "여기(here), have my soup," wonwoo stretched his arm out to pass the soup to you. "choose a skewer," vernon handed you his packed breakfast. "want to try this keto bibimbap?" s.coups asked shyly "mingyu-yah give your water bottle to y/n and we'll share with mine instead. "그래(okay)" mingyu placed the bottle beside you. you went blank after. with food in both hands, watching the boys proceed eating makes you think, gosh i'm lucky. these boys makes everyone feel like they're part of their family. you let out a deep sigh. "noona, are you gonna eat that?" vernon teased. you pouted at him turning your body away from him and started devouring your food. "hmmmmm! 맛있어(tastes good)!"

"we have arrived!" dongro announced. you looked out the window to see yerin standing by the performance unit's van talking to dino. seungcheol slid the door open and offers his hand to you. you smiled at him and took his hand then jumped off the van. "yerin 애기(baby)!!" you shouted. as soon as yerin saw you, you two ran towards each other and hugged. "unnie, 보고 싶어용 (i missed you)" yerin whispered to you. "나도(me too) how are you? wow! today's going seventeen set looks grand!" you looked around. "they'll be playing jokgu," yerin linked her arm with yours. "jogku?" "yes unnie, foot volleyball," "aaahhh" you nodded your head in awe learning something new.

while the seventeen members settled down for their hair and makeup, you and yerin joined the crew assembly and listened attentively at you individual tasks for the day. your job today is setting up the lunch table after their game. that'll be easy peasy.

it's fifteen minutes before lunch and you were slowly completing the table set up. you're on your way back to the table carrying a box of utensils when..

"hyung 화이팅(fighting)!!" the8 cheered from the side. "pfht! i swear he'll barely make a score!" seungkwan scoffed. "don't listen to him hoshi," jun assured hoshi who was obviously nervous on making the last point for their team. "can you all just shut up and let us just finish this game? i am starving!" woozi was beginning to be impatient.

hoshi served the ball then joshua and jeonghan received it at the same time. the impact was strong that it bounced out the court's boundaries, straight to your direction. "noona!!" the maknae line shouted. somehow you were distracted by your own line of thoughts you didn't bother to pay attention at the audible commotion behind you. wonwoo happened to be at the very corner, as a fast runner he was able to reach you before the ball. "y/n!!" he stopped a foot away from you and before you could even make a full turn to face him the ball hit wonwoo's back pushing him against you.

everything happened so fast. you getting startled, wonwoo balancing himself on your shoulders, you dropping the box you were holding.. and then seeing that your faces were just inches away from each other as soon as you opened your eyes. wonwoo quickly moved away when he heard someone approaching.

"y/n 괜찮아(are you okay)?" jeonghan held onto your arm. "tsssss. yeah i'm fine hyung!" wonwoo mocked. "aigoo. that's not what i meant," jeonghan hugged wonwoo just like how he would to manage the situation. "y/n, let me help you with that" joshua started picking up the contents of the box for you. "thank you josh," you thanked lowly.

you eyed jeonghan and wonwoo slowly moving away sitting at the bleachers nearby.

he could've just let the ball hit me.. he really didn't have to.. aish.. this is going to be.. awkward.

C H A P T E R T W E L V E 👇

[uhgood-dooghu]

Dial Tone [M]

Author uhgood-dooghu

Pairing Namjoon x Reader

Summary Namjoon’s been gone for a week. That’s it, that’s the tweet.

Rating 18+

Genre Smut, fluff, my attempt at crack, established relationship

Warnings Explicit sexual content, phone sex, daddy kink you’ve been warned, dom/sub undertones, begging, edging, orgasm control, dirty talk, use of a sex toy, Namjoon’s packing, OC is a bro girl at heart, self gratuitous porn with no plot

Word Count 2.7k

“Daddy...”

Namjoon almost swerves into a passing truck as your breathy voice fills his car.

Swearing, he composes himself, eyes flitting rapidly between the road and his phone, the Bluetooth allowing a string needy moans to ring out from the speakers.

When you’d called earlier, he’d been in the middle of the Meeting of the Year (trademarked by Seokjin), deep in the throes of negotiations but also riding high on the success of the afternoon. He hadn’t seen the notification until he’d finally left the building forty-five minutes late, waving goodbye to his business partner and waiting for his car just outside the lobby. He’d frowned when he’d seen your name. You’d made plans this morning to call him later tonight, so the timestamp concerned him slightly, but he knew well enough that if there was an emergency, you would call at least 7 times. Probably blow up Seokjin’s phone as well.

Sliding into the drivers seat, he’d connected his phone and pulled onto the street, absentmindedly hitting play on your message.

Thank god Seokjin had declined his offer for a ride.

“Holy mother of fuck,” he exclaims, panic clouding his thoughts before he has the sense to throw a hand out and adjust the volume. Does he know what’s happening? No. But he really doesn’t need the bass bumping your moans through the window for the whole world to hear.

Gripping the steering wheel, he swallows thickly, ears tuning in to the words you start to speak.

“Daddy, I need you,” you whine. “Where are you? You said you’d be done by now–“ You break off with a gasp.

When it hits him, the panic subsides, his jaw locking in place as he maneuvers his way through the evening rush. To clarify, you’d made very specific plans to call him tonight.

Apparently you’d gotten impatient.

The way your voice shakes tells him you probably had three fingers buried in your pussy, trying and failing to replicate what his own fingers are capable of. He listens to you take a few grounding breaths.

“I miss you, daddy. You’ve been gone for so long–oh my god–I miss you touching me.”

Namjoon’s eyes harden and he presses harder on the gas. A horn blares to his left, but he ignores it completely, barely seeing the angry driver flip him off, because his pants suddenly feel much tighter than they did five seconds ago.

“I miss your fingers. And your dick. Fuuuck, daddyyy!”

Your moans start to escalate, chasing after that edge, likely trying so hard to curl your fingers against your g-spot while circling your clit frantically with your free hand. His knuckles whiten around the wheel, his exhale dark as your voice turns progressively more manic, more helplessly panicked, until you cry out in desperation, the way you always do when you’re denied.

Your voice cracks and he feels it right in his dick.

“Daddy daddy, please please please, call me back, please please, I wanna come, daddy, I’ve been so good, please please please, call me.”

Your words slur, voice wrecked, and you let out a final sob before the message ends.

Namjoon sits frozen for a moment, mechanically turning his car into the hotel drive, before he inhales sharply and looks down.

Yep, he’s hard as fuck.

“Shit.”

Pulling up to the valet, he fumbles with his belt, tucking his erection into his waistband with a silent prayer that it’ll be enough to save him some embarrassment. It probably won’t (surprise, it’s actually quite difficult to hide a massive dick, who would’ve thought), but he doesn’t have a whole lot of options. At least he wore black pants.

He grabs his phone and steps out of the car only a little awkwardly, passing the man his keys before making a beeline for the glass doors. Thankfully, the lobby is near vacant as he rushes to the elevator, angling himself away from the front desk. Still, the receptionist raises an eyebrow, so he forces a smile, dimples fully on display even as his eyes stare daggers at the dial above the door. Tapping at his phone, he shoots you a text.

Namjoon: Couldn’t wait for tonight, huh? [6:31 PM]

When the doors finally open, he darts inside, choosing his floor and frantically tapping the “close” button.

The elevator moves far too slowly. That’s all he can think as he adjusts his crotch, swearing under his breath. It does nothing to relieve the pressure and he swears again. He really does have big dick problems. He nearly trips when the doors slide open, narrowly missing a wide-eyed housekeeper passing by with a cleaning cart. He is quick to apologize but does not stop as he speeds to his suite, already tugging at the knot of his tie.

Letting himself through the door, he works the top few buttons of his shirt open and glances at his phone. You haven’t responded, which, knowing you, could mean one of two things. Either you let the moment pass...or you’re too fucked out to notice his message.

Quirking a brow, he texts again.

Namjoon: You there baby? [6:34 PM]

This time your response is immediate.

Y/n: Call me [6:34 PM]

With a chuckle, he strips to his boxers and falls to the mattress. Readjusting on the pillows, he presses the phone to his ear, listening to it ring twice before you pick up.

“Daddy…”

“Hi, baby.” He hooks his arm behind his head and licks his lips. “What you up to?”

He smirks when you moan, loud and wanton.

“Having fun?”

You stutter out a yes.

“Mmm, without me?”

He listens in amusement as you keen.

“I’m sorry, daddy, I c-couldn’t help it. I miss you!”

“It’s okay, princess. I miss you, too.”

In the background, he hears a soft drone.

“You got a toy in you, baby?”

“Mhmmm!”

“Yeah? Which one?”

You take a shaky breath. “T-the black one.”

He hums in approval, cock twitching at the image of you lying on the bed, legs spread, the suction cup of your favorite toy pressed to your clit while the other end curves inside you, buzzing against your g-spot. He can picture the way your eyes squeeze shut as you bite and suck on your fingers to keep yourself from touching.

“How long’s it been in, princess?”

“Too long,” you moan, and he tuts in disapproval.

“Not an answer.”

You whimper, voice pitching. “Since I c-called you.”

In the back of his mind, he’s impressed. That was at least an hour. Giving a low whistle, he finally reaches down and briefly palms himself. The relief shoots up his spine as he sighs.

“Dang, baby. Wanna tell daddy what you did while you waited for me?”

The way you groan tells him you’d much rather not, but he waits expectantly. You know what to say if you want to stop. You exhale a few times before managing to speak.

“I u-used my fingers...and I played with my clit. I got myself m-messy for you.” You pause to breathe. “Then g-got close, I was so close, and then I called you.”

You’re starting to heave, voice modulating rhythmically, and Namjoon suspects you are rocking your head back and forth, trying to keep the pleasure at bay. His dick throbs, but he refuses to touch just yet. Not until he hears you be good for him.

“Keep going, baby.”

You huff a whine and press on. “T-then I put my toy in...I let it suck my clit–ah!”

The device clicks off and he swells with pride and satisfaction as you pant heavily in his ear. Your self-control never fails to blow his mind. He doesn’t even have to tell you what to do, you’re so desperate to please. Tugging at his waistband, he pulls the elastic below his balls, finally wrapping his hand around the base of his cock and squeezing.

“You like that, huh? You like your toy sucking your clit?”

“D-daddy sucks it better.” You mewl and click the toy back to life.

He allows himself a smug grin. Sue him, it’s nice to hear. “What then, baby? What did you do next?”

Slowly, he starts raking his fist over his shaft, swirling the palm over the tip, and he bites back a groan, because, shit, he gets so ridiculously hard for you, it’s almost pathetic. Almost.

“I–fuck–I kept it inside me, and I...I p-played with my nipples until I was close–shiiiiit.”

You’re losing coherency by the second, and Namjoon loves it. It sets his nerve-endings on fire. Makes him a little light-headed himself. Still, he murmurs soft praises in your ear, wishing he was there to stroke your hair and kiss your face, your hands, literally every inch of your body. It takes you a minute to continue, the vibe clicking on and off once more.

“I was s-so close, and then I t-turned it up and it felt so good, daddy, it felt so good!” You’re on the verge of tears, and Namjoon smiles fondly, dragging his thumb through the precum beading at his slit.

“I’m sure it did, baby. Were you a good girl?”

“Yes yes yes,” you insist, and he hears the frantic rustle of sheets. “I was good, I didn’t come. I promise.” There’s a slight change in your voice, the toy becoming more muffled, and he can tell you’ve flipped to your stomach. “I promise.” This time you actually sob, and Namjoon shushes you softly.

“It’s okay, baby, I believe you.”

You moan. “Daddy, I wanna come.”

The throb of his dick lets him know he wants you to come, too. He moves his fist just a little faster.

“I know, baby.” Biting his lip, he lets his eyes fall shut. “But I want you to use your fingers first. Take the toy out and get them wet. Taste yourself for me, princess.”

You shift and, a few moments later, audibly swallow.

“Tastes so good...” you moan.

Fuck.

“Yeah? Nice and sweet for me?”

Your affirming whimper is slightly muffled, and Namjoon can see the way you press your face into the mattress, ass up and knees wide, fingers drenched in your own slick and drool as you rock your hips in the air. The image is lethal.

“Yesss daddy, please–“ You choke in the way you do when you force yourself to hold off for him. “Please, I’m so close, I’ve been so close for so long, please.”

God, he doesn’t know why he loves this so much. It’s almost sadistic how much he gets off on hearing you beg, on hearing you so broken and needy and desperate, such a far cry from the confidently composed woman he knows you to be.

In the beginning, he was confused, reluctant even, when you asked him to take control of your pleasure. Even though the idea sent a shiver up his spine, he couldn’t imagine you of all people truly wanting something like that. You, who demands control in every aspect of your life, who refuses to take orders and sends 6’ 5”, built-like-dump-truck CEOs crashing face first into their glass office doors (a story for another time).

He asked you again and again and again if you were sure, hesitant to jump too hastily, no matter how badly his mind and body buzzed at the thought. It took you grabbing his face and shaking him, promising him you wanted this, wanted him to have that final say, for him to finally agree. You had a more detailed conversation after that, discussing boundaries and safe words and all the nuts and bolts he was adamant to set firmly in place.

You haven’t come without permission since.

And now, as you whine and beg for him, completely at his mercy even 1,000 miles away, he revels in the power trip. He feels it swim through his veins and collect in his dick, and yeah, another drop of precum oozes out because that’s how much he fucking loves this.

“Daddy,” you choke, and he can tell you’re quickly reaching a breaking point.

“It’s ok, princess, I’m here.”

Putting you on speaker, he sets his phone on his chest and reaches down to cup his balls. He’s barely touched himself, but they’re already so tight, and he knows he won’t need a whole lot to get there. You do all the work without even trying.

You keen helplessly, and he rolls the flesh in his palm.

“Alright, baby,” he coos. “Put your toy back in. I want you to turn it up high. I wanna hear it, okay?”

The answering buzz has you crying out. Loudly.

Namjoon grins in satisfaction. Resting his head back, he tugs on his dick, finally allowing the warmth to grow and spread throughout his limbs. Your moans spur him on, his pace increasing in time with your desperation, until all he can hear are your sobs of ‘daddy daddy daddy!’

Fuck, he’s close.

“You know what to do, baby,” he growls.

You’re practically wailing, words muffled and unintelligible, and he fleetingly wishes he had FaceTimed you instead.

“Can’t hear you, princess.”

You gasp loudly.

“P-please, daddy, can I come?” You break off in a desperate slur of pleasepleaseplease, and that’s all he needs to snap.

Gritting his teeth, he tightens his fist.

“Come.”

“Fuck, daddy!” You squeal, crying out for him incoherently as you fall apart, the sound slightly distorted from the way your writhing rustles the sheets against the speaker.

“Good girl,” he groans, fist pumping furiously, head falling back as your whimpers send him over the edge. Cum spurts over his hand and stomach in hot streaks. “Such a good girl for me, fuck.”

He works himself through the pleasure, dragging his cum back down his cock, all the while showering you with praise as you gasp helplessly.

“Fuck, baby, you did so well.” With a hiss, he slows his hand to a stop, giving himself one last squeeze before dropping his dick to his stomach. “I’m so fucking proud of you. You hear me?”

You whimper, panting heavily, toy already clicked silent, and he knows you’re just about boneless on the sheets. For a second he lies there, letting the cloud settle, his sticky hand hanging off the bed. Taking a breath, he checks in.

“Can you talk to me, y/n?”

You don’t respond right away. “G-give me a minute,” you eventually whisper, and he relents with a soft ‘okay.’

It takes about five minutes, but he finally hears your breathing level out, a sated sigh crackling though the phone.

“How you feeling, babe?”

“Dead.”

He laughs, grabbing some tissues from the nightstand. “How long were you–“

“Two hours. Two fucking hours, Joon.” He laughs again, wiping the cum from his abs and fingers. “How long does it take to check your messages, goddamn!”

“Sorry, the meeting ran long.”

You hum in mock annoyance, then yawn loudly. “It went well, at least?”

“Mhmm, really well. We closed the deal.”

“Fuck yeah, bro.”

Laughing, Namjoon tosses the tissues in the trash and falls back onto the pillows. “Were you really edging for that long?”

“I mean, I took a couple breaks, but yeah, pretty much.”

He shakes his head, feeling a little guilty. “I’m sorry, baby, you know you didn’t have to–“

“Namjoon. It felt good. Really good.”

“...well, shit.”

You snort, and he lets go of any intrusive thoughts. He trusts that you know what you want, and lord knows he’ll give you anything you ask for. He hears you yawn once more with a smile.

“You should go to sleep.”

“It’s only 7.”

“You’ll be asleep in an hour anyways.”

You shift on the bed with a scoff. “You calling me old?”

“If you want me to.”

“I’ll pass, thanks.”

Namjoon smiles, and starts softly asking about your day, content to just hear your voice and stare aimlessly at the ceiling. Eventually, though, you settle into silence, simply listening to each other breathe. It’s not nearly as good as feeling your warmth beside him, but he’ll live. Still, he’s counting down the hours until his plane lands in a few days and he can kiss you for real. It’s been a long week.

He sighs. “I miss you, y/n.”

“I miss you, too, Joonie. I love you.”

His heart swells and he closes his eyes. He loves you, too. So goddamn much.

© moodievitamine, January 2021. Please do not copy, repost, or translate!

[fandomtrxsh19]

So, when I read ACOSF, I made kind of play by play notes as a listened to it( I read the audiobook) so.........here’s the chaos

HEAVY SPOILERS FOR ACOSF!!

CASSIAN SAID FUCK

WHOA there’s a LOT of swearing in this

“It’s SEVEN in the morning gods damn it” -nesta archeron

OVERSIZED SHIRTS FOR THE WIN

Feyre and Rhys have 5 houses? Not surprised...

full, inviting breasts......BIG BOOBS OMG CASSIAN YOU HORNY SON OF A BITCH

7 siphons to keep his magic under control? Dayum

So, she rode this unnamed male like a fucking roller coaster?

Depression sex? Depression sex

“Her father was ashes in the wind” DAMN THATS EDGY

“A moment of release among the darkness inside her” NESTA BBY THIS ISNT HEATHY

“She avoided both of them” not surprised

OOOOH RHYS HATES HER TEA IS BEING SPILT

So, depression sex and depression alcohol? Yup

*checks chapter count* 80 CHAPTERS??!?! Oh shit this is gonna be a triiiip

OOOOOOOOO RHYS AND NESTA BEEF

Feyre trying to apologize to nesta........she’s trying

“You’re done, Nesta” The fuuuuuck.....

So, nesta’s moving and training with cassian...........Feyre, this isn’t a good idea omg

Feyre holy shit what the fuck are you doing, you TOTAL HELICOPTER SISTER?

“I never want to speak to you again!” damn

ELAIN TRAUMA!!! Yay???

MOR FOCUSED CHAPTER!!!?

she has brown eyes? Ok

FUCK SHES WEARING A BLUE DRESS FUCK

nesta knows about mor NESTA KNOWS ABOUT MOR!!!

“I am worthless and I am nothing. I hate what I am.” DAYUM I’ve been in that exact mindset numerous times. I can relate, Nesta

Briallen? Who the fuck is that?

Scars being trapped in magic? Good fuck that’s dark

“Ooh a dark skin character? Lit

OH SHIT SHE CANT FLY HER WINGS ARE CLIPPED

Is her name Emery?

“I am the monster your fear” BBY OMG GET THERAPY

Gwyn? Seems a bit aloof

“Two gentle conversations” GOOD JOB

Fairy lights omg lol

Nesta reading smutty books.....I’m imagining this omg

THE HOUSE IS ALIVE? Sweet

OMG ELAIN SHIT!!!! BBY

“All she wanted to do was touch him” OOOOOHHHHH NESSIAN

“All I need is a hot meal and a good book.” Mood

Nesta’s worried about Mor??? REEEEEEE

“Nesta needed Feyre more than she realized.“ OOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOO FAE BARGANS

They’re bound by magic on the body?? Ooh

IT’S TRAINING TIME BITCHES

“I don’t hate you too,Cassian” OMGGGGGG REEEEE

Nesta SMILED

THEY MENTIONED VALKYRIES!!!!!

“You might be my only friend.” HMMMMMMM

*hears how cassian was born * OMG HOLY SHIT CASSIAN

*hears cassians backstory* DAMN THESE CHARACTERS NEED THERAPY

OOP SLIGHT DEPRESSION SEX

OOP CLOTHING REMOVAL

“I’ve loved you since the first moment I held you in my arms.” HMMMMMMMM

I’m loving this Nessian sparring training.

ELAIN! SHES IN THE STORY KIND OF

Elain has small boobs........same

“I thought I would drop by to see how you were doing.” AWWWWWWWWW

Yayy.....awkward sister talks........

“She was the monster.” Nesta.............I can relate.

Nesta’s angry at Elain.............

Elain’s trying to reach out and Nesta’s denying it.

MY HEART

AGAIN...THE👏RA👏PY👏

“No more seeing her sisters without her permisson.” That’s smart.

Soooooooooo......Rhys is now a German Shepard.........?

OMG CASSIAN KILLED EVERYONE THAT HELPED KILL HIS MOM........good for him

“Use that training and make me.” OOOOOOOMGGGGGG

Rhys is overprotective of Feyre and shields her......daaaaaaaaaaaaamn

“What exactly happened in the cauldron?” FEYRE BAD IDEA BAD IDEA BAD IDEA

Again, Nesta, ✨THERAPY✨

Put a stop to what, D-does the IC know of the ✨depression smut?✨

“There was touching, but with her permission” WE 👏STAN 👏A KING👏

THAT ASKS👏FOR👏CON👏SENT👏

“Who do you think I am?” “A drunk fool who’s wasting my time?” OOOOOOOHHHHH SHOOTS FIRED!!!

Emery and Nesta to Emery’s cousin: GO HOME YOUR DRUNK ASSHOLE

*hears Nesta’s grand✨mama✨* me: grandmama, it’s me....ANASTASIA

Bruh...NESTA BIT CASS’S EAR

ugh the tool

“Baby making” hehe lol

“Nesta like gwyn”...............could she also be biiiiiiiii??????????!!!!!! YAY FIRST FRIEND IM PROUD OF YOUUUUU

NESTA SMILES AGAIN YAY!!

Alright, Meryl is BITCH

GWYN’S A QUARTER NYMPH?? Cool

“She’s failed everything.” BBY

HER POWERS? HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT SILVER FLAMES

ICY FIRE??? FUUUUUUUUUCK

Nesta must’ve been petrified being surrounded by fire

It’s a dream? THE FUCK

WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT SHE WAS DREAMING????

Cassian saw HER TRAUMA?????? FUUUUUUCK

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HER POWER IS DEAAAAATHH FUUUUUUCK

THE BABY HAS WIIIIINGS!!!!!!

Why is Rhys angry about the wing thing?

Ohhhhhhhhhh shiiiiiiiiiit the tool

*hearing the possibilities of half Illyrian baby* OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH FUUUUUCK OMG

“I loved it when you fucked my mouth cassian?” GAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH NEEESTAAAAA THIS ISNT HEALTHY

“What could go wrong?” DONT JINX IT

fairy monsters? OHOHOHOOOO

NONONONOOOOOO NOT AN ASH ARROW

BLACK EYES???? Fuck fuck are they in the cauldron?

OMG THE KELPIE IS DOING SHIT TO NESTA!!! Are they on the cauldron?

the MAAAAAAASK

ohOOOOOOOMGOMGOMGOMG SHE SUMMONED THE FUCKING DEAD REEEEEEEEEEE

Omg NESTAS POWERS ARE SO FUCKING COOL

She LITERALLY HAS AN UNDEAD ARMYYYYY

death HERself........badass

“Because you and cassian has been giving each other sultry looks all morning” SHE KNOWS

“For the first time in her life, she finally felt good in her own skin.” GROWTH

Omg Nesta created a swooooord!!!!! Cool

ITS INFUSED WITH MAGIC??? HELL YEAH

“I can’t lie to her!” SIIIIIIIMP

“I’d be careful when fucking her.” Oh amren

FUUUUUUCK FUCK BOOOOOOOOO TAMLIN

“You will not touch us.” YES TELL HIM

“I can’t believe Feyre ever loved tamlin.” ME TOO

“Elain saw everything Nesta did.” Daaaaaaaaamn

OOOOOOOO NESTAS PIIIIIIIISSED

OOOOOOOOOOO SECRETS FEYRE’S PIIIIIIISED

Nesta messed up and I think she realizes that

Rhys is pissed now and wants to kill Nesta....SHIIIIIIIT

Nesta: heads for a tavern me: NONONONONO GODS DAMN IT YOU’VE COME SO FAR

“I will fight for him. For us. Until I can’t anymore.” FEYRE IS GONNA BE A GREAT MOM

“Wishing to disappear into nothing.” I’ve been there.

“Cassian knew Nesta hated herself, but didn’t know how sometimes she wanted to unexist.” I RELATE TO THAT SHIT

“She had been born wrong.” AWWWWW BBY SHIIIIIT

“Was she worth being counted?” I CAN RELATE

*hearing Nesta blaming herself for her fathers death and for the horrible things she’s done, saying she can’t fix it* SHIT IM CRYING (I’m not joking)

“ I deserve nothing.” I CAN RELATE BITCH IM ACTUALLY CRYING

*hears Cassian calmly reassuring and comforting her* AWWWWW I NEED THIS QUOTE

CASSIAN CARES SO MUCH FOR HER I LOVE THIS

(I really needed that cassian talk. I literally wrote most of the quote down just in case. Thank you SJM)

EMERY CAN SENSE THE SEX HOLY SHIT

“After he’d fucked her with her fingers...” O NONONONOOO

*skips to chapter 52*

Lanthis??? Who the fuck is that?

“Gwyn and Emery are my friends” SHES GROWN SO MUCH!!!

26 dimensions? OH THIS IS SOME DOCTOR STRANGE SHIT

IT CANT BE KILLED

cassian and Nesta really went *yeet* .......... I’m sorry

THE SWORDS NAME IS ADORAXIA!!!!!!!!!!!sounds like a dnd character IDEAS

OHOHOHOOOOO BLACK THRONE AND A CROWN DEATH QUEEN NESTA WITH HER HAIR DOOOOOOWN

Rhys vs Cassian standoff *western duel music starts*

NESTA APOLOGIZED FOR EARLIER IM SO PROUD

Did Elain have a vision? DID SHE???

“I want you to seduce him.” NESTA THE HIDDEN BARD ROLL FOR PERSUASION

Mor teaching Nesta the waltz? NESTA AND MOR CAN NOT HATE EACH OTHER

Are they back at their childhood home? Because oooooooooooof ✨ childhood trauma✨

MOR AND NESTA HAVING A CONVERSATION YAY!!!!! (This’ll make rping them so maybe easier)

“We’re in a book!” Holy shit they know. HIDE THE FANFICTION

The relationship between Nesta, Emery, and Gwyn is so wholesome

“Oh FUCK you” .... NESTA

“I was just checking on dessert” MOOD

MOR AND NESTA ARE HAVING A FRIENDLY CONVERSATION

I sense tension between amren and Nesta

ERIS WANTS NESTA????

“I’m not with you.” Lier

A SNOWBALL FIGHT WITH THE BATBOIS??? Holy shit they do have one(1) brain cell

A sleepover with Emery, Nesta, and Gwyn? SIGN ME UP

“Do it for the miniature Pegasus!” INSIDE JOKES

OOOOHHH i see the gwynriel ship

Wait....HER POWERS MADE THE HOUSE BE ALIVE??? Sweet

Alright 2 months til FEYSAND baby

The mating bond between cassian and Nesta?????.............

“Say it, SAY IT” GODS DAMN IT NESTA SAY THE FUCKING THING

So, Nesta’s afraid she’s gonna loose her humanity?

EMERIE NESTA AND GWYN ARE IN THE BLOODRITE? Fuuuuuuuuuck

OH NO EMERIE!!!!!!

“High Fae bitch” PUT THAT ON A SHIRT

OMG OMG OMG HELL YES VALKRIES

oh Cassian you restless bastard you

*hears Emerie’s backstory and their heart to heart* AWWWWWW I LOVE THEM

“The morrigan.” The fuck Eris?

“She’d hit the archway of stone” OOOOOOOOOOF

“For being my friends when I didn’t deserve it.” AWWWWWWWWWW

What about Feyre’s pregnancy???? Hewwo?

“Lord of bastards” heh true that’s cassian alright

Wait, OTHER set of wings

CASSIAN!!!!!!!!!!

“Now, I’m going to slit your little throat.” FUUUUUUUUCK NONONONOOOOO THIS ISNT CASS FUUUUCK

What’s the trove?

NONONONONOOOO WHYD HE GET STABBED SHIT HE GOT STABBED

Nesta’s pissed.....MAGIC TIME

wait wait wait wait wait HES NOT STABBED HELL YEAH!!!!

“You are my mate, Cassian.” ITS ABOUT FUCKING TIME

Nessian: kissing when the world is in ruin

“She started bleeding hours ago. “ BABY TIME???

*hears the blood and feyre’s appearance*!FUUUUUUUUUCK

So, no C section? OOOOOOH SHIT THEYRE DOING IT

IM SCARED IM SCARED IM SCARED

“Silent babe?” Shiiiiiiiiiiiiit

Nesta Nesta Nesta What the fuck are you doing???????? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

SHE HAS ALL 3! ONONONOOOOOFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK

OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOOOOOOSHE PLUCKED IT FUCK

SHE STOPPED TIME?????????

WHOS the female voice?

“ I love you, Feyre” SHE DID IT IM SO PROUD!!!!!

What is she doing what is she doing what is she doiiiiingggg?

GIVE WHAT BACK?????

WHAAAAAT? A BARGAIN WITH THE FUCKING CAULDRON???

feyres alive? FEYRE’S ALIVE!!!!!!!

NESTA THE MVP!!!!

*the sister hug* AWWWWWWWWWWW

AWWWWWW I LOVE THE NAME NYX!!!!

How much did the Cauldron take from Nesta, tho?

FEYSAND IS BEST PARENTS

Alright, I want to see LOADS OF WHOLESOME FANFICS AND FANART ABOUT DOMESTIC IC AND ELAIN AND NESTA GOT IT?

[threeconsecutivefs]

Prompt: "Want me to teach you?"

(Inspired by this fic, check them out! Their @ is @prettyboiimagines​)

Bokuto x reader

814 words

How did you get into this situation...? There you were, being lifted up like Simba by your owl-like boyfriend, teetering at the tips of his fingers. You only came by to help out the managers to pass time as you waited for him... so why is he teaching you how to spike?

10 minutes ago:

"Kouuuuu!" Your voice rang through the gymnasium where it reached the ears of everyone there. As a chorus of oohs and aahs echoed endlessly, Bokuto sprinted over to you to embrace your body. "Kooooouuuuuuuu," You peeped through his muscular arms, "I can't breathe!"

He released you and tilted his body down to your height. "HEY (Y/N)!! Sorry about that, I'm just on a roll here." He beamed, puffing out his chest with pride. You could practically see feathers being fluffed out of his pride. He grasped your wrist and dragged you over to the court. When you reached the halfway point to the net, he jumped behind you and grasped your biceps.

"Hey, hey, hey,(why do i do this to myself) what are you doing!?" You yelped, turning your head to look at him.

He beamed again and declared, "I'm gonna teach you how to spike while you're here!! Since I'm on a roll, I'm going to show you how!"

You frantically thought what you were to do. Should you decline? Should you just do it? Every time Bokuto tried to do something like this, it never ended well.  Well, it couldn't hurt to learn.

You relaxed your arms as he guided your arms in the motion of a spike.

"So you retract your arm- Hey Akaashi! Did I say that right!?" Bokuto stopped his instruction and turned to look at the Fukurodani setter.

"Yes, Bokuto-san." Akaashi replied shortly.

"Yes! Ok, ok. So you retract your arm-" He grasped your shoulder and pulled it back. "And then you swing while hitting the ball with the palm of your hands." He stepped in front of you and pulled your fingers in the motion of a spike.

With his hands holding your fingers, you shifted your hands to hold his hand while clasping his other hand as well. "So, is that it? Because I've watched you spike, and as you know, I can barely jump over the net." You tiptoed and pecked his nose, despite the beads of sweat coating it.

"Oh yeah, well, I'll do something about that." He replied oddly nonchalantly and stepped to the side. He motioned to Akaashi to help set the ball to you, and in a few short moments, you were positioned to spike the ball.

Bokuto tossed the ball to Akaashi and you began to run. However, what you didn't realize was that Bokuto was behind you, and when the ball was set, Bokuto lifted you from under your armpits and you swung, hitting the ball over the net.

You gasped with happiness, with the satisfaction of smackiing that ball over the net, but because of the momentum of the swing, and that Bokuto really didn't have a good hold on you(yeah, he really didn't think this through), you tipped over a bit too much and both of you fell, your face pushing into the net as you fell.

Laughing, Bokuto stood up, but when he got a glance at you, his smile fell. You had a bloody nose and tears in your eyes. Turns out, you had fallen, your nose got caught in the fence, and then you fell on the with your chin. He rushed over to you with worry clear in his face. He plopped beside you and caressed your face.

"Shiiiiit, babe? Are you ok? I'm so sorry!!" He ran over to get some tissues and an ice pack and wiped up your face. He then rolled the tissue into plugs and plugged your nose up. He brought the ice pack to your chin and kissed your forehead.

All you could think about was how unfrazzled he was. It was kind of unnerving... that is, until it all went haywire.

As soon as you were taken care of, you were bombarded with apologies. As Bokuto went on and on with his apologies, he began to wilt further and further. As you couldn't really move your jaw at the moment, you couldn't console him with words, so instead you nuzzled your nose against his and pressed your relaxed lips against his, showing that he had nothing to be sorry for.  You did consent to it after all.

With an almost closed mouth, you whispered, “It’s ok, Kou.  You just wanted to help.”  

Tears gathered in his eyes and he wrapped you in his arms.

“Well, at least you made a good spike,” He smiled against your hair

“That’s what you care abo-ow...??”  You winced at your throbbing jaw, scolding your boyfriend.

“Sorry...” He sheepishly grinned.

“S’okay, baby, I still lub you.” 

(Masterlist)

[spi11edink]

Because I did a big dumb

Repost of the story from a prompt of @imagine-darksiders. I did, as the title says, a big dumb and was trying to delete a sideblog a while back and accidentally threw out my main. So, here you go. Imma do the first three parts here because I’m lazy and don’t wanna make three separate posts.

It was a normal morning, you had just gotten up from your bed and were preparing for the day ahead. You blearily rub your eyes as you descend the stairs to the main level of your house. Stifling a yawn, you make a pot of coffee and hope that the day wouldn’t be too taxing. After gathering the things to make your breakfast, the red light on the coffee pot flickers to life. You grab your favorite mug and, muffling another yawn into your pajama sleeve, pour yourself a cup of coffee. The warmth soaked into your palms as you add the necessary ingredients to the black liquid. You take a sip, feeling the caffeine rush through your system. It helped, if only slightly, to make you want to go to work. 

You had just sat down to eat your breakfast when a very disconcerting sound made its way to your ears. 

CRASH

You jump from your chair and nearly knock over the precious lifeblood in your mug. You grab the handle of the mug and rush outside, flinging open the door and scanning around. At first there was nothing wrong, but then your eyes landed on your car. The entire roof was caved in, but nothing around it told you just how it had happened. 

“Oh... dammit.” You mutter to yourself as you rush over to your one and only car. You place the mug of coffee on the hood and sigh to yourself, circling the car to see just what had happened. 

When you reached the other side of the vehicle you finally saw it. 

Or him, that is. 

A huge man is laying on the ground, arms and legs sprawled out in the gravel of your driveway. As you look closer, you realize that this is no normal man. Sparkling golden armor accented with creams and silvers encased his entire body, except for his head, which sported a nasty cut. You spotted a pair of beautiful white wings like those of a dove sprouting from his back, the only problem being that one of them was bent at a quite unnatural angle.

You glance at the coffee mug on the hood of the car and cautiously take another sip, wondering if you really should have stayed up that late last night. You cautiously make your way closer to the creature, kneeling down and setting your mug upon the ground. 

I really hope he isn’t dead. You thought as you placed two fingers on his neck, releasing a sigh of relief when you felt a pulse. You sigh. “I can’t just leave him out here. He’ll cook in that armor.” You shake your head, still not fully believing that the creature had actually crushed your car. Or actually existed. You take out your cell phone and call your work, saying that you wouldn’t be able to come in today. 

Cursing softly to yourself, you take a closer look at the creature’s face. He -you were assuming by looks alone- had dark skin and white hair. A short, neatly trimmed beard was on his chin and a scar marred the left side of his face. You couldn’t see his eyes as they were closed. His features were strong as if they had been carved from stone and, even though he was currently unconscious, you could feel an aura of power and authority emanating from him.  

You shrug to yourself and stand up, taking one of the man’s feet and tried to drag him into your house. You didn’t know what else to expect, but the guy was heavy. You huff and take a sip of coffee, hoping the caffeine would give you a boost. You grab the man’s foot again and grunt as he slides a few feet. You sigh. 

This was going to be a long day. 

When you finally get him into your house -wasting half of the air conditioning because it took a while- you flop onto the floor. 

“Why is it so damn hot at nine in the morning?!” You lamented, looking again at the man who was now sprawled across your floor. Wiping a bit of the sweat from your brow, you rise from the floor and place your fists on your hips. “May as well get him on the sofa so I don’t trip on him later.” You grumble and eventually drag the gargantuan man onto the -in comparison- tiny sofa. The furniture creaks its protest as you try to get most of the man onto the sofa. Well, his arm may be hanging off and his legs too, but you did pretty well if you do say so yourself. You sigh to yourself as you take the recliner on the other side of the room, wondering what you should do now that you have the day off. You eye the stranger and the cut on his head. “I may as well clean him up.” You go into your bathroom and rifle around until you find a first-aid kit. 

You take a cotton swab and uncap the small bottle of rubbing alcohol, shaking your head as you invert the container once. You kneel down in front of the sofa and dab at the cut until you deemed it clean. After letting the alcohol dry, you dig around for the Neosporin and a band-aid. You curse. You only had pink ones left in the container. 

“Suppose he’ll have to get over it then.” You shrug and put a dab of the antibiotics on the bandage before affixing it to the right side of his forehead. You look at the injured wing and place your hand on your chin. You work at a bird sanctuary over the weekends, so you have had plenty of experience with wings, but you wonder if his are different than the ones you have had to bandage over the years. Shrugging, you move to assess the damage. It was broken alright, and pretty badly too if you consider the angle it was at earlier. You pray he wouldn’t wake up while you were setting it because it would hurt like the dickens, but you were prepared. Thankfully, the man stayed unconscious and you aligned the bones with a rather sickening crunch. No matter how many times you had done that, the noise was no less unnerving. You wrap the wing as best as you could with the cheap bandages you had in the first aid kit and wonder if you should see if there was any other damage. Shrugging to yourself you pull up a chair to the sofa and begin to unclasp the armor. 

There were a few other cuts on his arms you patched up with the pink bandages, but nothing serious. You had placed the armor in a neat pile in the corner so you wouldn’t trip on it and were putting the first aid kit away when your phone buzzed. 

You took it from your back pocket and looked at the screen, your face going cold. 

It was from your parents. 

Be over at about five. Bringing cake for dessert. Love you, Mom and Dad.

“Shit, shit shiiiiit!” You whisper, your voice going up a few octaves in pure nervousness. “What the hell am I going to do?” You glance at the time. 4:30. “When the hell did it get so late?!” You scramble around your house, kicking yourself for forgetting that your parents were coming over that night for dinner. Even worse was that the rest of the family was coming over the next day for the fourth of July. They were going to watch the amazing fireworks show the town put on. You sprint outside, nearly falling down the front steps and tearing the keys from your pocket. Miraculously, your car started and you cursed to yourself as you drove it around to the back of your house, hiding it in the shed. You rocket back into your house where the man was still unconscious on your sofa. Thousands of things were running through your head. What were they going to say? What were they going to do? You didn’t know this man and here he was on your sofa?! You frantically pace back and forth in your living room, biting your nails and running your hands through your hair. Hide him maybe? But where? Your family goes wherever usually; they had small kids.You didn’t even notice that the man had woken up. You only noticed when he spoke. 

“Where am I?” 

You jumped at least a foot in the air when the voice met your ears. You whipped around to see the man scanning the room with inhumanly white eyes. You could barely make out his iris it was so light. You back up a good five feet when he sits up and his eyes land on you. Smiling nervously, you scratch the back of your head. 

“You, uh, kinda landed on my car. Unconscious.” A snowy eyebrow lifted. “I couldn’t just leave you out there to bake in the sun.” 

The man glanced around the room again and glanced something caught his eye apparently. His gaze snapped over to his arm where a hot pink bandage was stuck. Curious, he looked back to you. 

“You were a bit beat up so I, uh, patched you up. Pretty nasty cut on your face and a broken wing.” The man touched a finger to where another pink bandage was. “Sorry about the color; they were all I had left.” 

“No need to apologize. I should be doing so for damaging your property.” His voice was deep and held a certain power she rarely heard from anyone. “Thank you for being so kind to me. I must ask your name.” You thought about it for a brief second before deciding to trust him, giving him your name. 

“So what is your name?” 

“Oh! I seem to have left my manners back home. My name is Nathaniel.” You hum; the name suited him. You were about to say something when a noise that made your face drain of all color met your ears. 

Knock Knock Knock! 

“Oh shit! UH! This is really awkward. My parents are here for dinner.” 

“I am sorry for intruding. I will go if you want.” He didn’t sound at all upset. 

“No, no. I just need to think of something. A coworker? Friend? Shit. I have no clue what I am doing.” You run your hands through your hair and pace for a few seconds before another series of knocks ring through your house. “Okay. A friend from work or something. That’ll work. But shit! You have wings. They aren’t as chill as me. I hate to ask this but is there any way you could… hide them without armor or something?” 

Nathaniel’s eyes traced you as you paced back and forth, biting your thumb. He knew you wouldn’t leave him alone while injured, that much was clear. “Give me a moment. Do you have anywhere I could-?” He trailed off, looking at his armor.  

“Oh!” You pointed out the restroom at the back of your own room. “You can put the armor on the dresser I guess.” Another, more urgent, set of knocks rings out and you rush to the door. You fling open the door and your parents’ faces greet you. Your mother is holding the cake they promised for dessert and your father held a few bags. 

“You took quite a while. Everything alright?” Your mother asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“Oh! Sorry about that. I was finishing drying my hair from the shower I took. Hard to hear in there.” You lied. “Everything set for tomorrow?”

“Yes. Everyone is all ready to come over. Are you ready for the herd of them though?” Your mother strode in, your father in tow, and made a beeline for the kitchen. 

“I’m prepared for them.” You smiled. “I may need a few minutes to get something for dinner though. Hope you aren’t starving now. I have had a long day.” It wasn’t a lie; you have been swamped even though you had no work today. 

“Your father can stand to wait a few more minutes.” Your mother glanced at where your father sat in the living room. “Need any help?” 

You fumbled over the pots and pans, throwing a recipe together in your mind. You were still shaken from that morning and weren’t paying enough attention to what you were doing. “Crap!” You jump when a pot lands right on your toe. “Good thing this is the one I need.” You fumble as you fill the pot with water and set the stove for cooking. “May I ask what is in the bags?” 

“Just some sparklers and other such things for the kids.” You hum in response as you pull out various things from your refrigerator. 

“Good idea. Need to keep them occupied until dark. You mind helping me tomorrow for lunch? I have a menu planned, but I haven’t made anything yet. My job has made sure of that.” 

“I hope you know that you are going to have to swat your father away from it.” You laugh. “But he should be manning the grill with your grandfather so you can get him back if he is too annoying.” 

“Hear that, Dad?” You call. Your father gets up from the sofa and makes his way to the coffee pot. 

“Yeah, yeah. As long as you don’t eat raw hamburger meat.” 

“As long as you don’t try to eat the cake while we’re making it.” Both you and your mother scold at the same time. Loud creaking shifts the attention to the man standing in the doorway between your living room and kitchen. 

“Oh! You could have told us you were having someone over and we could have come tomorrow with the rest.” 

You put some pork chops in the oven and pour the pasta in the boiling water. “No need. I just found out recently. My friend from work a while back came to town.” You hoped the lie wasn’t too obvious. “This is Nathaniel. Nathaniel, (M/N) and (F/N).” 

Nathaniel bowed his head shallowly. “It is nice to meet you both. I thank (Y/N) for welcoming me so warmly at the last minute.” He was now wearing robes, which your parents noticed immediately, that were a rich brown color. Despite that, they were somehow bright. Gold thread accented lighter patterns in the fabric.His wings were nowhere to be seen, and you deduced he hid them under the loose robes. 

“Yeah. I was excited to hear that he was coming back from his hometown.” Your parents seemed to run with it, assuming he was from a different country with different looks than them. You were grateful that your parents don't question things too much. 

A somewhat awkward silence fell over the kitchen as you drained the pasta and added the necessary ingredients to it. 

“Well I hope all of you are up for pork chops and macaroni.”

You felt as if all eyes in the universe were on you as you set up the four places at your table. You shifted nervously as you brought the food to the table and set it down in the center. 

“Welp. Hope you enjoy.” You say, fidgeting as you sit down at your place at the end of the table, waiting as the other three seated at their places took their share of the food. You finally ladle your portion of the macaroni onto your plain white plate and took one of the pork chops, glancing nervously around the table. 

“So, Nathaniel, are you going to be coming with us to the fireworks show tomorrow?” Your mother piped up as your father eagerly cut a piece off of the porkchop.

He glanced to you and you gave a slight nod. “I suppose I will be attending.” He replied, somewhat awkwardly trying to figure out how he should cut the porkchop with the tiny silverware in his enormous hands. 

“Have you ever seen the fireworks show? It is a treat no matter how many times you see it.” 

“I have not seen it. I look forward to it.” Nathaniel looked somewhat perplexed; probably trying to figure out just what fireworks were. Humans were incapable of magic; so how would they work fire? 

“So what exactly is your job?” Your father asked after thoroughly salting the macaroni. “(Y/N) Mentioned that your used to work with her?” 

Nathaniel took a moment to think, swallowing what food he had in his mouth and placing the silverware down on the table. It was only polite when engaging in conversation. He raked through his brain for an answer. Did you tell him your occupation? He glanced around the table and saw you glancing down. His eyes followed yours to where there was something on the napkin at his place. I work at a bird sanctuary. Was printed. “I used to help her out with the birds. She is a wonderful caretaker.” Nobody else heard it, but Nathaniel heard you release a silent breath when your parents bought it. 

“Where are you from, Nathaniel?” You mother asked, curious. 

“Not around here. I’m not exactly sure what you would call it here.” You sighed as that only seemed to evoke more prodding from your parents. He seemed adamant on not telling them he was, in fact, probably an angel. You had guessed that a while ago, but never got the chance to ask. The white hair, the eyes, the wings, golden armor. It added up in your mind. He was probably a warrior one because of the way he held himself. You absentmindedly ate your dinner as the other three conversed. You noticed Nathaniel was more focused on talking than food, and assumed it was an angel thing. 

A silence fell over the table and only then did Nathaniel continue eating. You had finished your food and your father was going in for seconds. Your mother had finished as well, but had politely placed her silverware down and seemed to be studying the newcomer. She glanced at you a few times, but you disregarded it as you picked up another porkchop. They were cooked the way your grandmother cooked them and you made them only a few times a month. Okay, okay, every other day. They were that good. You’d think you would get tired of them, but they went so well with everything, and they were so easy to make! You couldn’t resist! Besides, it was summer and everyone grilled outside as much as they could; you included. 

“I’m ready for cake.” Your father stated before getting ready to go and cut himself a slice. 

“Is everyone else ready for cake before (F/N) eats half of it?” Your mother rolled her eyes before herding your father away from the cake and expertly managing to find where you kept your cutting knives. She had a way of finding everything even if it wasn’t her house. 

“I’m ready!” You nearly launch your chair backwards as you place your plate in the sink and exchange it for a clean one. “I’ve been looking forward to this all week!” It was a rare occurrence when you lived with your parents that cake was made. Unless you had the random craving for cake poppers and made them yourself. And were promptly swarmed by the rest of your family. You watch in anticipation as your mother cuts the first slice of the fluffy and perfectly iced cake, expertly avoiding getting any of the icing on her hands. It plopped onto the plate and she handed it to you, your eyes lighting up. Nathaniel had never had this ‘cake’ before -as a matter of fact, he hadn’t had a lot of earth food- and was curious to why you seemed so excited about it. You weren’t nearly as excited over the other food. Was it special? Some sort of tradition? 

“Nathaniel, dear, would you like some cake?” Your mother’s voice jolted him from his thoughts. Should he try some? He heard Azrael was a big fan, absolutely beaming every time the word was mentioned. Well, beaming more than usual. 

“I would like some please.” He finally decided, getting up from his place to receive the plate held out for him. He picked up his fork, still marveling at how tiny it was, and glanced over to you. You had already finished and were glancing over at your mother, contemplating getting another slice. Nathaniel mentally shrugged and tried a bit. 

He understood what Azrael meant now. 

After dinner, you cleaned up the plates and placed them in the sink, seeing your parents head for the living room after declining their help with the dishes. Nathaniel remained in the kitchen. 

“You okay over there?” You called as you placed one of the pots in the dish drain, moving on to a plate. It was a few moments before you got a response. 

“I am fine. Just… pondering.” You grunt in response and continue on with washing the dishes. 

“Are you sure you don’t want help?” Nathaniel raised his head from where he was staring at the wood grain in the table. 

“Nah. Isn’t too much trouble for me. You can go in and watch TV or something if you want. No need to stay in here.” You respond, glancing over your shoulder to see your parents on the sofa and watching the news. 

“I can wait until you are finished.” Nathaniel responded. You shrugged, puffing a strand of hair out of your face as you washed the last pot. You drained the sink and washed off your hands, drying them on one of the towels that hung around your kitchen. 

“Come on, I wanna see if my show is on.” You walk into the living room and grab the remote off of the coffee table and scan over the guide before finding your show, no objections from your parents which was a rarity. 

“The kitten show?” Your father huffs. “I thought that was what YouTube was for.” 

“My house. I can watch kittens whenever I want.” You respond, sticking out your tongue as you sit on the recliner tucked perfectly in one corner. That, you had made very clear to your family, was your chair and nobody was allowed to sit in it unless they had explicit permission from you. 

“Kittens?” Nathaniel asked curiously as he took a seat on the floor and looked to where you all were looking. He felt his heart nearly explode from the odd cuteness of the animals. They were so… small and helpless. He had the urge to pet them, but it seemed that you didn’t have one that he could see. He heard you say ‘aww’ more than a few times as the ‘kittens’ grew up and somehow didn’t lose that cuteness. 

Several hours of kittens passed and your parents decided to go to bed. You directed them to the one guest room you had in your house and continued to watch the screen. 

“Are you an angel?” You asked suddenly, disregarding the fact that it sounded like the beginnings of a terrible pick-up line. Nathaniel didn’t seem to notice that fact and turned away from the television. 

“I suppose you still do have questions.” He shifted. The man had moved to the couch when your parents left and seemed saddened by something. “I am an angel.” 

“What kind of angel?” 

“I used to be a warrior.” 

You lifted an eyebrow, not sensing the remorse in the angel’s face. “Used to be?” 

“It… is a long story.” 

You leap in excitement. You always liked stories. And one from a warrior angel! “I have time. I’m a night owl anyways.” Nathaniel was slightly cheered by your enthusiasm and a smile quirked the edge of his scarred lips. 

“Alright then. It all started when…”

[horrorstreet]

Matchup please? I am straight, female, 5,3. I have brown shoulder length hair, brown eyes, and I wear glasses. I am a shy and quiet at first and may come off as rude, but the more I know a person the more I open up. I am protective, sassy, emotionally guarded, stubborn, clumsy, tough, touch starved, and introverted . I like the paranormal (even tho I am a skeptic), the 80's, superheros, videogames, horror movies, rock music, and true crime. I am a major bookworm, collector of anything, i do embroidery, baker, painter, and a self-taughht SFX artist. I have an anger issue, I make stupid jokes at wrong times. I am a tomboy, a farm kid, and I have huge wanderlust. (but only for abandoned yards, but its kind of hard for it not to be legal.)

Thank you I appreciate it :). Sorry I'm kinda all over the place lol.

Shiiiiit don't you dare apologize! This was awesome.

When they say opposites attract they really do mean it. You got matched with the one and only Freddy "Burnt as F U C K boy" Kruger.

First of all, you being quiet and coming off as rude is what I think would rope Freddy in right off the bat. He sees this as a challenge and wants to try and get you wrapped around his claw ( w i n k ) but he soon comes to find out it's the opposite. You have him deeply in love with you.

While you are quiet, he is loud. The more you open up the louder you become while the more Freddy opens up the more you get to see his quiet and calm side. It's a perfect match. Introverted + Extroverted may not seem like a good pair but when it comes to the both of you, there is an exception.

This man is so down to play video games with you. He could watch you play all day or try and beat you at whatever game you are playing. Freddy is super competitive. He will ask you to paint his dream worlds and finds it impressive how well you can morph yourself into anything you want with a few tools and some makeup though he would never admit it. You aren't alone in saying things at the wrong time. He has had his fair share of "Wow, not the time." Moments or simply saying things he doesn't mean. He doesnt think before he speaks and always gets easily pissed off at the smallest things.

He will take you wherever you would like to explore and create an entirely new world for you to take an adventure in and WILL join you and silently observe how happy you are. Want to explore somewhere abandoned? He's got you. Want to explore an old broken down barn. Go for it. He will keep you safe.

Oh, is he lucky to have you.

■■■■■■■■■

OK IDK IF THIS WAS GOOD OR NOT BUT PLEASE TELL ME IF YOU ENJOYED. I really want to know if I matched you with the person you were expecting. I tried my best to make this good but please give me your thoughts =)