#this isn't me being mad or anything/gen

[atinyladybug-daydreams]

I can't believe I got into TMA because @eepy-turtl pipebombed me with fucking cunty bitch boy bastard twink ass motherfucker Elias Fucking Bouchard.

The fact that all it takes is one twink to get me into a piece of media is not something I am proud of and is being exploited repeatedly by my friends 😭😭😭

[sant-riley]

[Task force 141 + others with Gen z!reader] [pt3]

A/N: Some of these you /may/ have seen on tiktok, that is me who posted them on tiktok. I am green haired bitch so no I didn't steal anything LMAO. I hope these live up to yalls expectations.

The last two of these my lovely friend gave me inspiration for <3 @frogchiro

Warnings: She/her pronouns swearing, age gaps, tiktok memes (like always lmk if I miss something!)

~

You steal Prices hat on numerous occasions bc its a fashion abomination and you refuse to let this man wear it around you. You hide around base as frequently as you can.

Jokes on you though bc he will literally wait til it's your birthday and buy you a matching one and will laugh at your scream of disgust.

Gaz one ups him by gifting you a matching hat as well, putting it on your head as he flicks the brim.

"Thanks Gaz! I love it!

"And not mine?"

"You're on thin ice, old man."

Price gets gifted a set from manscaped by the guys as a gag gift. He uses it for his beard bc he never bothered to look into why everyone was laughing around him.

Price takes your phone when you try and show him memes, squinting hard as fuck like a dad 💀

Soap, if yall have the time off takes you to scottish football games and it's a whole thing. You sitting there while he gets drunk out of his fucking mind, hollering and whooping and you're there trying to sink into your seat.

Chances are someone's gonna shove you and you're gonna trip and fall bc everyone's so amped up and Soap threatens to beat the shit out of them. It's a miracle y'all don't get kicked out 💀

If you have tattoos, Soap is the first one to take a marker set and color them in and adding his own additions. If you were ever to get them actually tattooed, he would tear up and pretend he isn't emotional about it.

"You like me that much Bonnie?"

He would get something of you too, so it evens out. This also makes Ghost in turn get a tattoo for you bc he refuses to be out done and he's just as attached

Neither of them get your call sign or your name, but they get something personal to what each of them associate you with.

The first time you meet Alex, you're across the room doing something that has your focus and didn't realize this is actually your first time meeting him. You ask him for a hand only to look up and see him extend his prosthetic at you with a smile and you scream.

"You asked for a hand but best I can do is a Leg." Price comes running and he sees the scene and rolls his eyes.

Everyone single one of them are the definition of "my girl can wear whatever she wants bc I'll break your jaw." meme btw. You can take care of yourself but you never need to bc they will beat a bitch up.

Laswell invites you constantly to come over and meet with her wife, esp if you don't have a mother figure. She always always tries to come on base to see you and always has a birthday and Christmas present on it's way to you wherever you may be. Her wife loves you to death and they've pretty much adopted you and you cannot escape it, oh well.

Gaz buys you whatever your little heart desires, especially if he's deployed away in a country where they sell exclusives of whatever you enjoy. It's a pain in the fucking ass to try and ship a anime figure to your place from Japan but he's gonna try his best.

Ghost doesn't share his food, or at least it was before you came along. He groans and grumbles about having to feed you but he wouldn't do it if he truly didn't want to. Soap asks and Ghost tells him to fuck off.

If you watch anime, please imagine trying to get everyone in the room and trying to explain who Dabi is. They're all so fucking old they keep thinking you're referring to the elf from Harry Potter and it infuriates you to no end.

Soap and Gaz know better but it's funnier to see you mad.

Being the youngest, they absolutely force you to do the jobs they don't want to. Whether it be cleaning the barracks, to cooking dinner when able, it doesn't matter bc they'll all pull rank on you.

"You're the new kid, get to it then."

"Ghosttttt-"

"Don't Ghost me."

Soap is the kind of motherfucker to play the fifa games and doesn't understand that he's stupid for buying it every single year bc there are no changes oncesoever. He will not listen to you about it and you've given up.

Ghost will see you talk about your etsy list and will ask for your phone, you trust him so of course you hand it over. He hands it back to you and it's just, all purchased. He says nothing while he sips on his tea while you scream at him asking why he did it. He won't tell you but it's because he knows it makes you happy and it'll keep your mood up, giving you a reason to be motivated to get through missions. It's also because he knows that retail therapy is a thing for your generation.

Soap, if you do any, is actually really good at doing your makeup! He knows how to do everything and he refuses to elaborate. (As a kid he'd do his mom's makeup when she went out for dates) he's the one who helps you doll up if you're going undercover.

Ghost, Gaz and Price find you unfunny whenever you make a "wow I wish British people were real." You say it so often and it gets annoying but they also just accept it's a part of life.

Soap personally enjoys the "SCOTLAND FOREVERRRRRRR" meme and will scream it with you. Ghost threatens to cut yalls tongue out.

Other parts can be found under #Kayla writes <3

Taglist:

@devilsfoodcake22 @simon-rileys-princess

@stupid-ninja @milkmily

@lune-la-chanson @tamayakii

@teacupcollector @sweet-as-an-angel

@perilous-pasta @ihatethisappsomuchitpains

@marsbar127xx @baddump

@xncasi @king-cookiex

@palomaxaxaxa @amatchasky @wolfyland07 @diejager

@hailstrum18 @pretty-little-bunny382728 @mzfandom

If you'd like to be tagged, go to my pinned post and comment there :)

[some-weebs-posts]

Ok, so I've been obsessed with Monster High since it came out, and my favorite character has always been Jackson Jekyll. And you know what? Not only is he an underrated character, but like, they made his background super detailed and complicated for like no reason. I couldn't tell you how many times I've gone on long rants trying to explain it all.

Think of this like a combination of different wikis. This is based on Generation 1, the movies from Boo York Boo York and previous, the diaries, the webisodes, and some of the books. I have not watched anything from Gen 2 or 3, which really doesn't matter because Jackson isn't in any of the reboots.

Basic Information

Jackson Jekyll and Holt Hyde are two people in the same body. They have different memories and different personalities.

Jackson Jekyll is 16 years old. His favorite color is yellow, his favorite food is mac & cheese, and his birthday is May 30th.

Holt Hyde is 16 years old. His favorite color is orange, his favorite food is hot wings, and his birthday is May 30th.

They both have a pet chameleon named Crossfade.

Jackson is a bit of a nerdy type. He enjoys wearing bow ties and sweater vests. He likes to play video games. He's crazy smart, and his favorite subject is Mad Science.

Holt has a rocker style with his everyday outfit being a red leather jacket and purple pants. He also shows more of their fire elemental side than Jackson, so he incorporates flames in all his outfits as well. He loves music, so he always wears headphones (not to mention that later becomes his trigger), and music theory is his favorite subject. He has a hot temper and can become angry very easily.

Jackson Jekyll is their default character. However, he transforms into Holt due to different triggers. His original trigger was it being either day or night where he was Jackson during the day and Holt at night. Later, his trigger changed to music with a 4/4 time signature, which is most music. In the diaries, Jackson states that his doctor believes the trigger will change at least one more time, and he is deathly afraid it will be something important that he can't avoid like taking a shower.

Jackson and Holt did not know of each other's existences until they were 16. Since their memories were different, they thought they had consistent black outs. Holt considered it just a way of life and how it was, but in the books, Jackson (thanks to the suggestion of Melody Carver) thought is was due to his extreme anxiety.

Family

Jackson Jekyll is the son of Dr. and Mrs. Jekyll.

Holt Hyde is the son of Mr. and Mrs. Hyde.

Jackson was born half normie (mom) and half monster (dad). The thing is, his dad is not the Jekyll/Hyde. That's his mom. His mom is the normie half of the Jekyll and Hyde combo. His dad is a fire elemental.

Holt is a full monster. His mother is the Hyde, and his father is a fire elemental.

This makes Jackson and Holt half-brothers. They have different moms but the same dad.

They know they have different moms or at least more than one mom. They call her Moms in the books and diaries. Their mom (in both versions of Jekyll and Hyde as far as I can tell) is named Sydney, who is a science teacher at Merston High and likes to go by Mrs. J.

That adds on another layer because that means his dad took his mom's last name, AND his dad's last name changes depending on who his wife is because he married both the Jekyll and the Hyde. So does that mean every time he is asked his name, the dad has to be like, "I don't know. Let me call my wife,"? Like, does he just change his name every day or is he just Dr. Jekyll by default and then changes his name if he gets a call from his wife? And he's not Dr. Hyde but Mr. Hyde, so does he loses his doctorate when his wife goes crazy?

Anyway, Jackson and Holt are cousins with Heath and Harmony Burns. Harmony is Heath's older sister. Their mother is Jackson and Holt's dad's sister aka their aunt.

Friends

Jackson's best friend is Deuce Gorgon.

Jackson first met Deuce in the diaries where they played some pick-up casketball. Then, they met-met and actually started to hang out after the webisode Fear Pressure. In the episode, Jackson had started to attend Monster High but was being bullied for being a normie (or at least appearing as one), so Deuce decided to take pity on him and let him sit at his and Heath's lunch table. Later on, Deuce introduced him to others like Gil.

When they first moved to their neighborhood, which made them change schools and start attending Monster High, Jackson only became Holt during the night, so Jackson was the first one to meet their neighbors. One time, Draculaura made him a welcome-to-the-neighborhood cake, and when he returned the tin, he met Dracula of which he was not afraid and actually made a joke about stakes. This was considered weird because both normies and monsters were afraid of Dracula, for in the diaries, he was described as being like a creepy, no-nonsense Nosferatu. Later, Draculaura invited him to Clawdeen's Boo-B-Que where he met The Wolfs.

During the night, Holt would come out and walk around. There, he studied his neighbor's houses and saw them very occasionally.

Holt actually went and became a DJ with the nickname DJ Hyde. While working a party, he met Draculaura. She was dancing the Transylvania Trance. He thought she was attractive and approached her by calling her Ula D, but she became confused because they had never met before.

That adds on another thing. Apparently, they can share some memories.

Romances

Jackson and Holt had many romances.

In the books, Jackson went to Merston High. There, he met a siren named Melody Carver. They started to date, but Melody met Cleo, because Cleo also went to this school for some reason, and they hated each other. So to get Melody jealous, Cleo ended up kissing Jackson. But he felt nothing for her. Then Melody started a band and revealed Holt, which started a love triangle except Jackson didn't know about Holt, so he didn't know what she was upset about. They ended up breaking up where she then got with a gargoyle named Granite who was also into music, but unfortunately their relationship never went anywhere, and Melody and Granite never became official.

Then there was Draculaura. Jackson and Holt both liked her, but she only ever tried to date Jackson. She said in one of her diaries that they ended up "breaking up", even though they were never officially dating, because he never went to their evening dates and could never remember exactly why he didn't the next morning. Little did they know it was because of Holt.

Then there was Frankie. She slowly fell in love with him over the course of Volume II of the webisodes in episodes such as Miss Information, Hyde Your Heart, and Hyde and Shriek. She originally liked Jackson because he was the new kid, and she was fairly new too and remembered how hard it was. She even stood up against his bully, Manny Taur. But then she met Holt and became conflicted because she thought she liked both of them and had to choose between them. After she found out they were the same person, she introduced them to each other, which is how they found out about each other in the first place. She then would record them talking on her phone so that they could talk to each other, but that got old fast, so she gave them separate phones specifically for texting each other. She decided they couldn't date until they got over their differences.

There was Operetta. In the diaries, Holt said that he liked that she liked music, so they went on a date at a concert. But then Holt got angry at someone, and due to his anger issues, he got into a fight. He and Operetta were kicked out. Her dad did not like that, and they weren't allowed to date anymore.

Then there was Clair. Clair is my personal favorite and is my OTP. In the movie Ghouls Rule, Holt got arrested while he and other monsters were vandalizing the normie school of New Salem High. He transformed back into Jackson while in jail, so they let him go thinking that Holt somehow kidnapped Jackson and swapped places with him. He became a fugitive, so Jackson hid by attending New Salem High. There, he met Clair. She stood up to bullies for him and even later defended him against the police after they captured him and tried to behead him (and no, I'm not joking). They had a discussion at the end where Holt commented that while Jackson and him don't agree on much, at least they can agree on women. He tried to kiss her, but she swapped him to Jackson first and then kissed him because, well, she didn't know him that well yet. She's an anti-police, anti-racism/speciesism, goth baddie, and I love her for that.

Side Notes

Despite being a huge nerd, Jackson is actually really good at sports. Jackson and Deuce only initially became friends because of a game of casketball. In Deuce's diary, he went to the court to play, but only saw "a lame human kid" aka Jackson. He was initially going to ignore him, but then Jackson asked to play. Then it turned out that Jackson could play very well. Quote, "I was gonna slide out of there, but he asked if I wanted to play some one on one. I figured it wouldn't take long to make him look like a statue out there, but I was wrong. He had a scary good jump shot and even crossed me over a couple times. I had just started to play really hard when my glasses got knocked off and broke. Now I have to figure out a way to get home without stoning someone, but dude just took off his shades and handed them over to me. He said to keep them until I got home and he'd get them later. Told me his name is Jackson Jekyll. He said he wants a rematch. I told him any time, any place. Not a bad guy...for a human." Also, in Friday Night Frights, Jackson attempted to join the roller maze team before he was stopped by Manny Taur. Edit: I just remembered he also plays volleyball in the Gloom Beach line.

Additionally, Jackson and Holt have facial piercings and tattoos. This is very rare and somewhat strange given they are only 16 and would at least need parent's permission for the tattoos. The only other G1 characters that have tattoos, that I know of, are Operetta and Wisp from 13 Wishes. The only other characters with facial piercings, not counting ear piercings, are Clair, Cleo, and Manny Taur as Cleo has the gem under her eye, Clair has a classic lip piercing, and Manny has a septum piercing. Jackson has one tattoo of a Ying & Yang symbol on his back, and he has an eyebrow piercing on his left eyebrow. Holt has two tattoos with the same Yin & Yang tattoo and an additional face tattoo around his eye. He also has a left eyebrow piercing.

The tattoos admittedly confuse me because the fact that Jackson doesn't have one of Holt's tattoos may imply that they got the tattoos separately, so they both just so happened to pick the same tattoo and then Holt got one extra. Also, their parents had to sign off on allowing their 16 year old son to be allowed to have a face tattoo.

Edit: Some people have mentioned that Holt's face tattoo may actually be a birthmark due it being mentioned in one of the diaries. However, this doesn't make sense to me because Jackson does not have a birthmark. So like many, I believe this mention of it being a birthmark was only added after they made the design as an excuse, and it should be left up for interpretation.

That's alI can think of for now. Info may change later, but that's the story of The Strange Case of Jackson Jekyll and Holt Hyde.

[mothsakura]

Pssst, I really love your OCs and would like to know more about them 🐋

I AM VERY HONORED- hmmmm as for ocs let me think although i will give a small disclaimer: anything older than 3 months is most likely outdated lore, i update these dude's lore frequently if you have any specific ocs you have in mind then please tell me! but i'll ramble about my favorite: GRANDPA <3 <3 <3 (Rotting Balance)

(little icon i made for him <3) First off, Rotting Balance (ID: 0.2|000021) was made with the purpose to be able to neutralize rot, following the recent (at the time. this was around late prototype/very early first gen) case of an early prototype succumbing to the rot. His administrator, Reflections in Last Fracture, Speaks of Mirrors had planned RB to become the next major breakthrough. However RB's construction put the council in debt, as Fractures basically built RB behind the council's back while stealing funds. Yes, Fractures was politically powerful enough to do this (second highest ranking), no the council was NOT happy. Furthermore, Fractures had neglected to approve RB's model (he tried post-activation but failed). RB's model is not listed on any network either, he literally does not legally exist by the law (at the time. no this was not fixed). Neither did RB turn out successful at all, he failed to pass the rot trials, the rot had (ironically) rotted the R.N.C (rot neutralizer core) from the inside out. That and RB's severe dislike and distrust of benefactors (the dudes who built the iterators) made him very hard to work with :( I do have a post about this actually! The art looks.................. kinda goofy............ I was tired and this was a while ago so unfortunately it did not end up turning out well, I will link the post here if you want a more coherent ramble on his backstory.

His circumstances are nothing to be desired. He's rotting, he's restricted via protocol (he lashed out at Fracture, Fractures "taught" him a lesson on that. The protocol shuts down half of his structural water-collecting pipes, which leaves him unable to provide his structure with enough water to cool down.), and his tired old machinery is far from it's prime. But it isn't all doom and gloom tbh!!! He is very passionate about his work ....that being crazy scientist experiments with rot and whatever weird contraption he builds, usually nicknaming it "The Rot Wrangler"

his crazy scientist look on full display here <3 <3 <3 He does not trust people easily, but if you are one of the people he trusts, asking him about his work will practically have him rambling on for hours about his weird contraptions that fight the rot <3 Also hc but not canon: he adores common ferns. He thinks they're funky little plants. They do not grow in his district, but he'd definitely try to keep one. (and accidentally kill it....) He also has a purposed organism named The Mauler!!! Mauler lives up to it's name, as it is a mix between slugcat and red lizard, but it is pretty docile to RB. It has become sort of like a therapy dog to him?

he's practically a whole other hyperfixation at this point ......................................................... mad scientist grandpa ................................................ i adore him.................................. and his weird old machinery

This is one of his 4 cores! It is unfortunately waaay too hot due to the aforementioned issue with cooling his structure :( but despite that, it still continues to function. Iterators were built to last after all. I probably have more to share but unfortunately my brain seemed to leak out of my ears as of lately- i am not too good at rambling in public- but i do hope that this ramble was coherent enough!!

[elkyralt]

are you serious rn people are mad at Ukranians for being angry at this post Chiitan made

For those that can't read Russian, it says:

"I'm Chiitan☆ Japan's crazy mascot! Chiitan☆ loves Russia! Support me with your subscriptions on X, and I'll be able to travel to you! Please, share this post and subscribe to me! Citizens of Russia, are you waiting for Chiitan☆?"

For the record here, this is an AD, meaning it was payed for to reach Russian people. The message saying "Chiitan loves Russia" is an understandable offence for Ukranians who are being GENOCIDED by the country of Russia. This is NOT the same as saying "Chiitan loves all people, even the regular citizens of Russia", this is it directly stating that it loves the country and not just the citizens that aren't directly taking part in the war (debatable).

This isn't some stupid 'Twitter' moment as it's getting disregarded to be, so how the fuck are Ukranians in the wrong for being angry at this? Like I'm so confused as to how this equates to a "Gen Z cancellation" as some tweets have been calling it, this is a completely valid response from Ukranians?????

I want to say, Chiitan did apologise, here's said message:

I understand wanting to stay apolitical as a brand, that makes complete sense to me! But the original post, again, states "Chiitan loves Russia" which is not referring to just a general message of ordinary love for all citizens of the world.

Now! I'm not calling for a cancellation or anything of the sort, I'm just really confused at how people are trying to say Ukranians are in the wrong here???? Like for what reason???? Disliking that Chiitan posted something saying that it loves the country actively genociding us???

Like what????????????????????????????

[pokemon-my-beloved]

the differences between teams flare, skull, yell, and star (and why only some of them work)

post under the cut because there is. a lot to say

so we all know that the villains in pokemon peaked with team plasma right (this is a matter of opinion but that's beyond the point)

and after team plasma, we have team flare. and team flare is. different.

they were the first evil ceo, unless you count cyrus, which i don't because cyrus (in my mind) was more about nihilism than corporate greed or anything

and lysandre is too, kinda? he's interesting enough, but literally everyone else in the team is boring as shit, especially compared to every team that came before them

so in kalos, we've got a villain team that doesn't really know what they've signed up for aside from the leader (probably it's been a hot minute. the admins might know), which makes sense, but the grunts and admins aren't entertaining at all. they're built up as a threat and exactly one of them is. it doesn't work

(this (imo) applies to most of gen 6's story but that's besides the point)

and then in alola, we've got team skull! this was the first generation i paid attention to the buildup for, and if i remember correctly, before release they were built up as the villain team, but not a threatening one. and in the game, that follows. no one really sees them as a threat on their own, cause they aren't.

but we've also got the aether foundation! and they were built up as mysterious but benevolent pre-release and in-game (didn't necessarily succeed but they tried well enough), and this was the first "twist villain" that pokemon did, and it was new and fresh and worked

and team skull isn't a threat. but they are an annoyance, and that's exactly what's needed during the storming of aether paradise. by allying team skull with the aether foundation, it gives both of them more of what they need most (seeming like a threat for team skull and character for aether foundation)

bonus points for aether foundation working well with the buildup because while almost everyone there is corrupt, we've still got wicke, who is genuinely benevolent and provides some nice contrast

the combination (as well as the fact that all of these dynamics were new) really sells the whole thing for me. it works

then we get to team yell :/

team yell was (pre-release and a little bit in-game) built up as villains and they Aren't. at all

and then at the same time, they expect us to believe that macro cosmos is totally fine and benevolent and nothing is wrong with anything they do? what the fuck

the part where you work with team yell to storm macro cosmos is fun and cool i guess, but that isn't enough to save either of them

team yell isn't a villain team, it's just an extension of piers being an overprotective brother and should have always been treated like that (amplified even more by the fact that marnie tells them off multiple times)

and macro cosmos doesn't work at all either because they expected us to be totally blindsided and then didn't even have the decency to have a single character who was morally good or benevolent like wicke!

at least aether foundation was built up as mysterious but benevolent, macro cosmos was just like "yeah we're a power company and good guys our chairman has the most rancid vibes you've ever seen but that means nothing" and then later it's like "oOoOoH wE'rE aCtUaLlY eViL aReN't YoU sUrPrIsEd????" like no!!!!! i'm not!!!!!!

and at this point the corrupt ceo bullshit and incompetent team bullshit is wearing SO thin, no one likes it or cares at ALL anymore

it's just like, go back to the mafia or whatever! i do not care about this! if i wanted to be mad at a ceo i've got enough irl to choose from!

which brings us finally to team star! they were built up as a villain team pre-release like the others, and we're all just like yeah okay whatever we know they're not a threat and probably fine people and we all know geeta is going to be the actual villain you aren't clever gamefreak

but then! we get to the game! and they aren't treated like villains!

they're treated like victims of circumstance who have gone too far and need to be stopped for their own good and it works

it works incredibly well, compounded by the fact that the actual villain was one no one was expecting

i have. many thoughts about the subversions of expectations that the professors pulled. but that's beyond the point-ish

but team star is not treated as a villain. at all. the closest we get is penny recruiting us to take them down, but that's more "they're a problem" than "they're a danger" and it works

tldr no pokemon villain has ever surpassed team plasma and gamefreak needs to join a union and stop making all their "twist" villains ceos thank you and goodnight

[thedevilsoftruth]

I know this isn't what I usually post but I just want to take a second and say thank you to The Downward Spiral and Trent Reznor.

I wasn't born during the time this album was released, I'm gen z but my parents, teachers, and most adults I know love this album and have memories from when it was released. It's funny how that works, isn't it? How can a band be this big? It just goes to show just how influential NIN really is, and how much of an impact they had on people as they were releasing music.

My first ever experience with Nine Inch Nails was when I was eleven or twelve. We didn't have wifi in our house and I was listening to the radio when my parents weren't in the house. I remember closer coming on and immediately feeling a sense of pure dread. I was terrified of that track, I thought it was the scariest song ever. Even through the censored chorus, I could piece together what Trent was saying and I was... angry? I called my dad and I was screaming, " I CANT BELIEVE THEY WOULD PLAY THIS ON THE RADIO. THIS IS SOME DIRTY STUFF!! HES SAYING I WANNA EFF YOU LIKE AN ANIMAL. " But even though I was so angry I was also curious. I wondered what the name of the song was and I wanted to listen to it again. I never found out and it never came back to me. Until 2022.

In 2022 my uncle was driving me somewhere when I heard that song on the radio again. And again another time in the car. I went home, went to YouTube and searched it up and ended up on really liking it. Beginning of last year I HATED NIN. Absolutely despised them. Couldn't listen to them, they were too loud for me and I just had a burning hatred for them for some reason. But I got sick one day and was reading a bunch of Moon Knight comics in bed and listening to YouTube music when Scantified from PHM came on. And I was In love.

The smooth, sexiness of that funky bass line, the alluring element of Trent's voice, all mingled together and penetrating my virgin ears. Scantified was really the song that got me into NIN. I enjoyed closer but I LOVED Scantified. The same night I went and listened to PHM twice. Head like a hole, ring finger, the only time, terrible lie. Those were the songs that had me awesturck. I kept thinking, " somebody made this. This is real. " It was just too good to be true. The whole album had me awestruck. It was unlike anything I'd ever listened to before. I liked Depeche Mode, The Police, She Wants Revenge and Prince. But nothing. Nothing ever came close to listening to PHM for the first time.

And it just got better as I listened to even more of this band. The fragile was the second album I ever truly liked by NIN. I loved it so much I asked my father to buy me the CD for it and PHM on my birthday last year. In fact I loved the fragile more than I loved PHM. And then late November of last year is when I really gave The Downward Spiral a listen.

I came back right where I started. In the car, with the radio playing. Except this time I was flipping through the CDs my aunt had. That was when I saw a CD that stood out to me. It was sliver with a white spiral printed onto it. I looked down and saw a familiar logo printed onto it. I didn't recognize the CD.

" Nine inch nails? Which album is this? I didn't know you liked them. " I asked my aunt. She had a huge grin on her face and then told me to put it in. And from that moment on, my taste in music was completely changed.

From the second I heard the very first second of Mr Self Destruct, I knew I was in for a ride. What is that loud noise? Is someone being beat? And then we go straight into all of these loud, complex noises I can't even describe. With all these textures and layers, Trent's kind of quiet, but angry voice throught the song mingled with all this loudness going on in the background is just... Art. And then it gets quiet. And it jumps back into that madness.

But I think out of all the songs on this album, the ones that stood out to me the most were Reptile and Ruiner. Reptile... I just can't even describe why I love so much. I love ruiner because of its kickass solo and it's pure madness and hatred, but reptile. Reptile is the missing piece of the puzzle that was the story this album tell you. I could talk about the story of this concept album, but thats a whole different conversation for another time. There's something about Reptile that you can't find anywhere. Reptile is dark, sexy, confusing, seemingly quiet ( according to my aunt ) and just... When you hear i youre like, " what the fuck is this? What hell is going on. " But in a good way. In the nicest way possible. There's a certain heaviness of this song, and I'd argue that while it's not they're angriest it's probably one of their heaviest. And not just like metal heaviest, I really don't know how to describe it. The guitar riffs in this song, especially after Trent says, " get it " and " devils speak of the way in which shell manifest" I think I just actually ascend each time I hear it.

It actually feels illegal listening to The Downward Spiral. It feels illegal listening to Nine Inch Nails in general because of how good they are. Trent Reznor is actually the greatest musician of all time-- hell, the greatest producer of all time. Like how can someone just be this good? He's such an amazing person too.

The Downward Spiral is my friend in my time of need. It's the guy who I look to whenever I'm sad and need to let out my anger. I can't listen to it all the way through without becoming depressed-- but this album hit home for me. I remember Trent saying one time somewhere that he dosent know how to write lyrics. That's just crazy in my eyes because he writes things that are actually real. Each time I listen to The Downward Spiral I feel like I'm being sung my entire life and everything I've ever struggled with.

To finish off this post, thank you Trent. Thank you for the wonderful decades that you've been producing music and changing lives. And happy late birthday to The Downward Spiral. Can't believe I missed the birthday of one of my favorite albums of all time.

[lailawinchesterr]

part two, jared’s help [jensen ackles]

series masterlist | main masterlist

two, 

"You need to stop this. It's stupid." That but was obvious. I know it’s stupid, but so what? I can do whatever i wanted, it’s my life. "No, don't even think about it, Laila. This isn't a 'i can do whatever i want' situation. You're  really hurting Jensen, and he's my best friend." Now that hit.

"I didn't mean to." I mumble lowly, giving him my back as i pour both cokes into ice filled glasses, then blending some pomegranate syrup into it. He sighs, placing a hand on my shoulder.

"I know, but you need to do better. You can't keep running away like this, it's been twelve months. At least talk to him. Be in a room with him without looking like you saw a ghost." I nod once but it doesn't seem to register what he's asking because he clears his throat and tries again, "Laila, i'm setting you both up to hangout tomorrow." 

My eyes widen as i stop pouring the drinks and turn to look at him. "What the fuck did you do?"

"I just told him that you guys would hang out tomorrow at the diner next to your apartment. you should've seen how his eyes lit up, Lils, come one, you need do this." My stomach twists and turns at both the news and Jensen’s reaction. I know I’m bad, but not that much, right? God, maybe I had been rude this past year especially with him and Danneel’s divorce. I don’t even see him anymore.

"Okay..." I hesitate and Jared gives me a worried glance. "But can we just drop it after this? We don't talk about it again and i'll stop coming to set if it upsets him."

"That's not what upsets him and you know it, you're always welcome on set we love having you there." I glare at him to shut up and he does, taking the small win. 

We make dinner until Gen comes back from the store and then all sit to eat. i’ll never get tired of this, my little family. I know how hard it was for Jared to accept that he actually has Gen in his life so he used to have me ground him, come on some of their dates to make sure he wasn't being played. It annoyed Gen at first, but now that she's gotten to understand Jared, she knows how much our friendships means to both of us so she came up with the idea of having 'family' dinners every Sunday, just the three of us. 

+

"You did what?" Mad was an understatement. Jensen had told his best friend his feelings towards the Laila situation in confidence not so he can run off and tell her the first chance he gets. Jensen wanted to at least appear to have some dignity in front of her, she used to be Danneel's best friend for God's sake.

"I just told her that you guys need to talk more, told her you'd love to go out with her and she agreed."

"Right, but i think you forgot to do something, Jared, really minor," he says, voice laced with sarcasm, "asking me whether or not i actually would love to go out with her."

"You wouldn't?" that's not the point, not the one Jensen was making anyways. What he meant was that... damn you, Jared. that's what he meant.

"You can curse me out all you want but i did you a solid. You guys needed to go out at least once in your life. I'll give you her number and the address of the place. You two firgure out a time, i'm not doing all the work." 

"All the work? Who asked you to do anything at all?" Jared rolls his eyes but snatches his friends phone to add Laila's number in anyways. Jared knows Jensen's just letting his frustration out, he doesn't actually care, in fact, if he didn't know any better he'd say he's excited. 

"Text her tonight cause i told her you're going out tomorrow. Don't make me look bad."

"It isn't a date."

"Yeah? Might as well be with how you two are acting." Jared rolls his eyes and walks onto set where he's called.

"Whatever." He mumbles like a child, checking the phone number under the contact 'Laila Rhodes SPN SET' as if he needed a reminder of where he knows her from. Jensen, though he'd never admit it, is actually excited and very pleased with his friend for setting this up, he wants to talk to laila more than anything seeing as he's spoken to her as much as he's spoken to the crafts team, probably a little less even if she used to come over.

When she'd be at their house, Danneel would more often than not shoo jensen away to go make coffee for them or hang out with the kids, or any other stupid excuse. At first, he thought it was because she didn't want them to meet but she later told him that Laila's very shy around new people and she didn't want her to leave. Jensen understood so he bit his tongue, but now, he's known her for 5 years, shy or not, they'd have to talk eventually. He'd make sure of it.

part three

[rainyraisin]

@cupcakeslushie 's Sep!au is super cool!!! And I literally adore Three with all my soul he is so freaking amazing!!! So what did I do?

Comic.

(Words underneath each panel, I gen forgot my handwriting is awful, apologies!)

"Donnie, you have to stop hanging out with the purple dragons."

"Why? We're frien-"

"No, you're not! They're using you!"

"What would they have to use?! Come on, April!"

"You're searching for something that isn't even there just to get mad at me!"

"No, *you* come on!"

"I care about you, Dee. I don't want to see you get hurt."

"No, you only pretend to care cause one tries to!"

"Look, I get it. You hate me, and... I hate you too. We don't have to be anything more than that."

---

I had to cut it down a bit to make sure it was only ten panels but I hope you still like it!!! I tried to keep it as true to the characters as possible. I really wanted to include Three's hallucinations in there somewhere but with the limited amount of panels I didn't get the chance. I hope to draw something related to that in the future!

I dont remember if this has been stated or if this was a hc but I honestly feel like even though Three is grateful to be apart of a family, given his faint memories of Draxum actually giving a crap about him prior to being affected with emperium, he'd be afraid that they don't actually care and they're going to rip it all away from him. Also I remember it being said that Three kinda tests the boundaries of their patience to see if that's going to happen? So that plus the purple dragons ask kinda culminated in this! Along with the idea that part of the reason Donnie doesn't get along with April is because since she argues back, she must hate him, so if she hates him then why shouldn't he hate her back? He doesn't see that she's trying to have a (platonic) relationship with him. Also I feel like he totally distances himself from her so what happened to Tim doesn't happen to her cause he knows his brothers care about her and they're already doing enough for him, he can't be even more of a burden to them. (This is all hcs ofc!!)

Also completely unrelated but hc that Three had paint all over his hand and touched the back of his mask but didn't realise and had that stain on there for months until somebody pointed it out to him-

[anamericangirl]

So hear me out. I agree that Dylan Mulaney's Girlhood video was stupid and full of shitty stereotypes. But how is it any different from the content gen z girls put out these days? This new generation of women has made being weak, childlike, hysterical, and overly emotional into something they should be proud of and nobody (not even feminists) wants to say anything about it, but the second a man does it everyone gets mad. If he were some Lana Del Rey fangirl with borderline personality disorder nobody would bat an eye.

It's not that a man did it so everyone is mad this is a man pretending to be a woman and making a mockery of women everywhere but we're all supposed to just be ok with it and treat him like he's actually a woman because he claims to be trans and trans people are above criticism for some reason.

The song isn't the problem. Dylan Mulvaney is.

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Human Luxuries

Read on Ao3

Warnings: none

Pairings: gen

Word Count: 5142

"It's not fair," she mumbles almost unthinkingly. She hears the shift as Chris moves again but Mom holds up a hand this time. "What's not fair, honey?" "I can't just be mad. When you get mad, or when you guys get mad," she says, jerking her head toward Chris, "you just…get to be mad. Like that's just a thing that you're allowed to do. But when I get mad, it's like everyone's looking for an excuse to…" She swallows. Her hands feel sticky. "…put me down or something." *** Being angry, as it turns out, is something of a human luxury.

The sprinkles have started to dye the ice cream. Rose swirls her spoon around the edge of the cup again. A red sprinkle sticks to the side of the cup and a trail of color leaves after it. She does it again. Part of the cup starts to go pink.

"You know, it's better if you eat it before it turns into soup."

"I know," she says automatically, looking up at Mom across the table. Mom raises an eyebrow and pointedly takes a bite of her own ice cream. Rose looks back down. "I'm gonna eat it."

"Mhm."

Now the blue sprinkles are starting to turn the ice cream blue. "Do you think there's a reason some of the sprinkles have stronger colors?"

"I think there's a reason Chris dropped you off personally and asked me to take you out for ice cream."

"God, Mom," Rose mutters, "you're so annoying."

"I'm your mother, I'm allowed to be." Mom's foot nudges her leg under the table. "What's going on, Rosie?"

Rose's hand tightens around the ice cream cup. The flimsy cardboard buckles slightly. She stuffs a too-large spoonful into her mouth and winces at the chill. Mom just waits as a group of kids run by, shrieking with excitement. She hunches her shoulders, hiding under her baseball cap.

"It's not my fault."

"Okay."

"It's not!"

Mom raises her eyebrows. Rose curls up tighter, stuffing another bite in her mouth. She has to take her hand off the ice cream cup and clench her fist under the table. The tug in her gut that summons the powers begins to take shape and she grabs her leg instead. She eats more of the ice cream.

"Rose," Mom prompts again.

"I got in trouble, okay?" She glares at the yellow sprinkle that isn't coloring the ice cream at all. "Is that what you want to hear?"

Mom goes quiet for a few moments. Then she asks Rose to look up. Rose does, glaring all the while.

"I'm not on Chris's side," Mom says quietly, "I'm not on Paul's side, or anyone else's side. I just want you to tell me what happened."

Rose looks away again. She stirs the ice cream. Mom stays quiet too, waiting. The kids get their ice cream and sit down at a table. One of them asks for more chocolate sauce.

"There was a new person who came to train me," she mutters finally, "he was supposed to help my hand-to-hand stuff get better."

"Did you know about it beforehand?"

"Chris mentioned something about it but I didn't know—he didn't tell me who it was gonna be." She scoffs. "He didn't tell me he was going to bring out the biggest fucking asshole in the entire world."

Mom nudges her foot slightly in a silent there's kids around. "I take it you two didn't get along?"

"He wasn't taking me seriously!" She throws her hands up and only just remembers to put down the spoon. "He kept acting like he knew everything and I didn't know anything and that I was some stupid kid! Then he kept asking me to do stuff wrong on purpose so it looked like I didn't know what I was doing and when I tried to point out that I knew he was making me screw up he said that I should've just done it right but when I tried to do it right, he yelled at me for not listening!"

God, that fucking smug asshole and his stupid face. He had that stupid expression that every single bad guy in movies has when they're being all superior and condescending and fucking annoying and he never wanted to listen to her, no, he just wanted to tell her she was wrong and stupid and piss her off.

"And then when I couldn't get something right away he sighed at me like I was the most disappointing thing in the world! And then I'd try to ask him for help and he'd tell me I should know it already which is stupid because how could I know something he's trying to teach me and then he made us go back to, like, the super basics. Like the stuff Chris taught me years ago. And then he said I was doing that stuff wrong and I told him to take it up with Chris 'cause Chris doesn't say I'm doing that stuff wrong and he's the one who taught me so really it'd be Chris he should be mad at for that stuff and—"

The tug in her gut is back. She cuts herself off. She stares back down at her ice cream. She eats another bite. The tug slowly goes away. She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly.

"And?" Mom asks.

"…and he said that if this is what Chris's training looks like then it was no wonder I hadn't been cleared to go out yet, that I wouldn't survive a day." she mumbles, "and I…got really mad."

The kids next to them scream and one of the parents says something about napkins.

"Did you use your powers on him?"

"It was an accident, I didn't mean to, I just got so mad." Rose glares at the next spoonful. "He pissed me off."

Mom doesn't say anything for a moment. Rose peers up behind the rim of the baseball cap to see her staring at the table with a frown on her face. She looks down again and stabs at the ice cream.

"Are you mad at me too? Or disappointed, or whatever it is parents say when they're mad but they don't want to tell you?"

"I'm not mad."

"Disappointed?" Mom gives her the 'why are you being unkind to me?' look and she looks away again. "Sorry."

They don't say anything for a while. Rose keeps stabbing the ice cream and eating it. The sprinkles have started to stick to the bottom of the cup too. There's a weird thing happening between a pink sprinkle and a green sprinkle.

"Well," Mom says eventually, "you definitely needed the ice cream."

Rose mournfully takes another bite. "It's not like I'll get a chance to have it for a while."

Mom doesn't say anything to that but she does reach out and squeeze her hand. Rose squeezes back. She looks like she's about to say something when she catches sight of something behind her. Rose turns and sees Chris's truck pull into the parking lot. She turns back around quickly and hunches over her ice cream.

"I don't want to go back yet," she whispers, "please, Mom."

Mom pulls out her phone and starts typing. Rose just continues to eat her ice cream as slowly as possible. She doesn't want to go back to that stupid compound with all the stupid cameras and the scientists who look at her like they want to stick her in a big jar and poke her with needles all day and the agents who think they're being so subtle when they put their fingers on the triggers when she walks by. She doesn't want to look at Chris's stupid face when he tells her that she shouldn't have used her powers on that asshole and now she's going to be on lockdown for the rest of her fucking life. She doesn't want to go back to her room and sulk and not get to be mad because they're watching her all the time.

…she doesn't want to—

"Alright," Mom says, putting her phone down, "Chris says you can finish your ice cream first."

"Thanks, Mom."

Mom winks and takes another bite of her…what the hell is that?

"What did you get?"

"This is their seasonal Traffic Light flavor, I think," Mom says, holding it up and turning it back and forth, "cherry, lemon, and lime, I think."

"You think?"

"Yeah, well, most of it just tastes like generic sweet stuff, so I'm guessing mostly based on color."

Despite everything, Rose huffs a laugh. "You're so weird, Mom."

"And don't you forget it, honey." She nods to Rose's cup. "How's your masterpiece over there, Picasso?"

"Good."

Mom laughs and then gets a little quiet. She nudges Rose's foot again. "As much as I respect the malicious compliance, Chris won't wait forever."

"I know."

She eats her ice cream. It feels surreal, it does. This morning, she was in a massive gray box of a training room with armed guards just out of sight along the upper railing. Sound bounced off the walls and hit her like they were specifically designed to amplify them. There was a rush and roar of blood in her ears and the tug in her gut yanked and then there were mold powers exploding out of her and racing across the room and now she's here, at an ice cream stand off to one side of the park at a picnic table with her mom, watching sprinkles dye the melted remains of two scoops vanilla, caramel sauce on top.

And Chris is waiting to take her back.

Rose's shoulders slump. The more she puts it off, the worse it will be. And the more likely it is that Chris'll get more upset and she knows he's mad at her already. It's probably not worth making it worse. So she spoons the last of the ice cream sprinkle soup into her mouth and scrubs a napkin across her face. Mom finishes her abomination too and stands up, tugging Rose under her arm as they walk across the park to Chris.

She hunches her shoulders when they come to a stop, her hands shoved deep in her pockets. Mom exchanges a brief hello with Chris and squeezes Rose to her side. Rose peeks up at Chris from under the hat. His face is stony but it normally looks like that.

"Are we going back now?" She winces inwardly at how much she sounds like a petulant kid.

"Actually, I thought that you and Mia could ride to hers and I'd meet you there."

Now Rose does look up at him in surprise. So does Mom. Chris glances briefly at her before looking back at Rose. "Figured it'd be an easier place to talk."

She bites back the half-dozen retorts on the tip of her tongue and just nods silently. Mom gives Chris another questioning look but he just shakes his head, turning and opening his car door. Mom takes her by the shoulders and steers her to her car. Chris waits until they're inside to get in himself and drive off after him.

"Why do you think he wants to talk at your place?"

"I'm not allowed on the base."

"You think he wants you there?" Mom shrugs. Rose looks out the window again. "You think he wants to tell you his version of what happened?"

"I think you are a teenager with a lot of emotions and Chris is a very accomplished agent who has no idea how to talk to someone who's not also a soldier."

A smile tugs at the corners of Rose's mouth. She looks over at Mom and reaches out to rest her hand on her arm. Without looking away from the road, Mom covers her hand and gives it a squeeze.

"I don't think he's on that other agent's side either," she says as they keep driving, "for whatever that's worth."

"No?"

"No. I think he's trying his best."

"Since when are you on Chris's side?"

"It's not about taking sides, honey. It's just about who you agree with about certain things."

"That's literally what taking sides is."

Mom gives her a look that she always translates to you'll understand when you're older in her head and looks back at the road. She sighs. "If Chris really was mad at you, do you think he'd have brought you out to have ice cream with me? Or suggested we go back to my place to talk instead of just taking you back?"

Rose shuffles and fiddles with her sleeves. "…no."

Mom doesn't say anything else for the rest of the drive. They pull into her parking space and get out, Chris pulling up a moment later and following them into Mom's house. Rose takes her shoes off and kicks them into the corner of the mat by the door. Chris does the same. Mom goes into the kitchen and comes out with a glass of water she hands to Rose.

"Chris?"

"Yeah, thanks."

She gets one for Chris and one for herself and moves into the living room, sitting down on the couch and getting three coasters for the coffee table. Rose follows and sits on the very corner, pulling her jacket closer around her shoulders. She catches the expressions Mom and Chris make out of the corner of her eye. After another moment, Chris sits down in the chair like he's afraid he's going to break it and puts his glass of water on the coaster.

"Rick's been discharged."

Rose rubs her thumb along a drop of water on the outside of the glass. "Is he fine?"

"Bruised. Sprained ankle. He's on concussion watch but the doctors don't think he has one." She nods. "Do you wanna tell me what happened?"

"Didn't he already tell you?"

"He told me his version. I want to hear yours."

"Why? So you can tell me what I did wrong?"

"Rose," Mom says quietly. Rose hunches her shoulders more.

"Sorry."

She hears the creak of the chair as Chris must lean forward. "Tell me what happened."

She does. She tells him that Rick was being an asshole and not listening to her. She tells him that he kept acting like she was a kid who didn't know anything and yet he somehow expected her to know things he knew she hadn't been taught. She tells him that he wouldn't listen when she said she knew what he was having her do was wrong and that she needed to be retaught the basics if she wasn't getting this.

"And I said that he should take it up with you 'cause you're the one who taught me that stuff." She looks up at him. "And you—you've never told me I'm doing the basic stuff wrong. Did he say that to you?"

"Something like it."

"What'd you say?"

Chris doesn't answer her perfectly reasonable question, instead motioning for her to continue. She sinks back into the couch, and slouches so the baseball cap covers her face.

"Did he tell you he told me that it was your fault I'm not ready for field work?"

"What?"

"'Cause he did. He said that if this is what your training looked like then it was no wonder I didn't do field work already." She peers out at him. "Did he tell you he said that?"

Chris looks at her, then looks down. "No. No, he didn't."

"He did."

"Is that what made you mad enough to use your powers on him?" Rose hunches down and doesn't say anything. Chris seems to take that as confirmation. "Were you trying to hurt him?"

"It was an accident, okay? I didn't do it on purpose."

"But you were trying to hurt him."

"I was pissed, okay?" She throws her hands up. "I was pissed at him and it came out. Yeah, I wanted to hurt him in the moment because he made me so mad, is that what you want me to say? Do you want me to apologize for it? 'Cause I'm not really that sorry he got bruised and has a sprained ankle."

"Rose," Mom says again.

"Don't 'Rose' me. You're telling me you've never been so mad you say something or do something just to hurt them because you're upset? Yeah, I got pissed. He pissed me off. I lashed out. I didn't mean to use my powers about it."

"Powers that are dangerous," Chris says in that way that means she has to shut up and listen, "whether or not you intend them to be. Powers that you have to learn to control, no matter how pissed off you are."

She glares at the coaster on the coffee table. "Was that the point of having him come and train me?"

Chris is quiet for a moment. She risks a glance up at him to see he's staring at the floor too. Something flickers across his face. He sighs. "You remember what I told you about the higher-ups wanting to move you to another squad?"

"What?" She sits up. "Am I being moved? Are—did I—"

"No," Chris says firmly, looking at her and Mom both as Mom sits up to put a hand protectively on Rose's shoulder. "You're not being moved. I told you, I'm not letting that happen."

Rose sags back into the couch. Mom scoots closer and puts Rose's head on her shoulder, wrapping an arm around her waist. Chris looks at them with a strange expression on his face and something almost like a smile. Then he shakes it off.

"I just meant that they're checking in on your training more now. They told me they were sending someone in to help evaluate you for the next phase. They just—" he sighs— "chose to send this asshole."

"…he is an asshole."

"Yes, he is." Chris makes a face. "I shouldn't be telling you this, but hell, after listening to that guy talk for a few minutes, I wanted to punch him too."

A laugh bubbles up out of Rose's throat before she can stop it. Mom snickers too. Even Chris looks like he might crack an actual smile for a few seconds before it goes away again. Rose fidgets with the edge of the zipper. "So what happens now?"

"Well, Rick wanted to call a meeting about getting you…contained," Chris says, holding up a hand when Mom looks like she's about to verbally rip his head off, "something about you being dangerous and out of control. 'Volatile,' I think was the word he used."

"And what did you say?" Mom asks.

"I told him that if he truly believed Rose was that volatile and dangerous, he should've known better than to intentionally provoke her." Rose looks up in surprise. Chris looks at her with a soft expression and nods once. "They want you watched for the next week or so and then you'll start training with other members of the Wolf Squad, but that's about it."

"Thank you, Chris."

He nods again. Rose just lets herself lie on Mom's side for a second, the tug finally going away. She's just so fucking tired. Tired of being poked and prodded, tired of being looked at like she's some freak. She'd known right after it happened too, that she shouldn't have used her powers. But it hadn't been a conscious choice either. It'd been like she was back in the Megamycete, with those things coming after her to suck her face off and she'd just…reacted. Like the mold was trying to protect itself by being proactive, or whatever. And she'd been so angry.

"It's not fair," she mumbles almost unthinkingly.

She hears the shift as Chris moves again but Mom holds up a hand this time. "What's not fair, honey?"

"I can't just be mad. When you get mad, or when you guys get mad," she says, jerking her head toward Chris, "you just…get to be mad. Like that's just a thing that you're allowed to do. But when I get mad, it's like everyone's looking for an excuse to…"

She swallows. Her hands feel sticky.

"…put me down or something."

She feels more than hears Mom inhale sharply before there are two arms around her, pulling her in for a hug. The rush of warmth has her closing her eyes immediately, turning her nose into Mom's hair with the smell of green apple shampoo filling her nose. She fists her hands in the jacket pockets and the ring around her neck burns into her chest. Mom's breathing goes a little shaky as she holds onto her. Across the room, she can hear Chris let out a long breath.

"I won't let that happen to you, Rose," he says lowly. "I promise."

Rose just nods into the crook of Mom's neck.

"It's okay to get angry, honey," Mom says, even though she hasn't let go, "that's just called being human."

"But I'm not human."

Mom's hold stutters for barely a moment before she's being hugged even tighter. She wiggles her arms out of her pockets and wraps them around Mom too. This…this is nice. Hugs are nice. She could stay here for a while.

So she does.

She truly has no idea how long she stays in the hug, only that her arms get sore and her chest feels pleasantly heavy. When they finally pull away, the side of her face feels prickly from loss of sensation and she rubs at it absentmindedly as she sits back on the couch. Chris doesn't look like he's moved either, just looking at the two of them with that soft expression on his face again. Mom keeps sitting right next to her, an arm around her waist, and reaches for the glass of water.

"Drink, honey."

She takes the glass. It's cool against her palm. The water tastes good. She manages about half the glass before she has to put it down again. Something beeps on Chris's phone and he pulls it out to have a look.

"We're expected back," he says quietly.

Rose gets up and Mom gives her another long hug. She goes to the front door to put her shoes back on, listening absentmindedly to the hushed conversation Mom and Chris have behind her. Eventually, it comes to a stop and Chris comes to put his shoes on too. Mom ruffles her hair.

"I'll see you for our shopping trip next month, okay, Rosie?"

Rose nods. "I love you, Mom."

"I love you too, honey. So much."

Chris nods to Mom and they go downstairs. He doesn't say anything as they get in the car and start the drive back to the compound, but he does turn on the radio and indicate that if she wants to change it, she can.

"You should get an aux cord."

"A what?"

"An aux cord. So you can plug your phone in and listen to the music on your phone."

"Why would I do that when the radio works just fine?"

"Maybe you're in a place where you don't have radio. Or access to the good stations."

"Then I probably shouldn't be listening to music."

Rose rolls her eyes. "Whatever."

They drive for a while in silence.

"Where do you get them?"

"Most big stores have them. Or you can order one online."

He nods. "What kind of music do you listen to on your phone?"

"Just whatever." An idea pops into her head and she just manages to stifle her grin. "Mostly whatever's on the radio."

She has to bite her lip not to laugh at how Chris's expression contorts in confusion, blinking over and over. "But you said—"

"Well, sometimes the radio doesn't play what I want. So I listen to it on my phone."

"What—" she can't hold back the laughter anymore and it fills the car. Chris rolls his eyes and shakes his head, but she catches a glimpse of him smiling fondly at her and hah, take that. "I don't understand you kids."

"How old are you again?"

"No, no, I know a trap when I see one."

She laughs again and this time Chris laughs too. They keep driving as the radio plays. It's one of those old stations that still plays songs from years ago and they both know a surprising amount of them. Chris because he was probably alive when they came out the first time and Rose because, well, she's been listening to a lot more old music lately.

Also, apparently Chris can sing?

He taps a finger against his lips when she exclaims that. "Don't you tell anyone. Our secret."

Rose giggles.

When they pull up to compound, she expects Chris to just walk her to her room and be on his way. But to her surprise, he asks if he can come in. She lets him, kicking her shoes off and sitting on the edge of the bed. He looks about awkwardly for a few seconds before he sits in her desk chair. He fidgets with his hands for a second. She frowns.

"What's wrong?"

"Why did it make you so mad," he asks quietly, "what Rick said about you not being ready for field work yet?"

Oh.

Rose tucks one knee up to her chest. It's been enough time that the worst of the anger has fizzled away, but the mold's tug in her gut returns. She puts her chin on her knee.

"Are you—do you want to start trying to do fieldwork? There are a couple smaller missions that you could run with us—"

"It wasn't about that."

"Then what was it?"

She closes her eyes, trying to swallow the lump in her throat. "He said that if I—if I went out into the field, I wouldn't last a day."

"That's not true, Rose. You probably wouldn't be able to do a mission on your own, but you'd—you're good, Rose. Don't let him get to you about that."

"It wasn't that either."

She can hear Chris frown. "Then what was it?"

"The way he said it—" her breath catches in her throat— "he made it sound like your training wasn't good enough, like it wasn't—wasn't enough to help someone survive and—an'—"

She swallows and to her dismay, feels her eyes grow damp.

"Like that was why Dad died. Because he wasn't good enough."

Chris inhales sharply. She looks over to see his fists clenched tightly, his eyes squeezed shut. She sniffles. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees a tiny gold sparkle near the switch for the lights and a feeling that isn't hers hangs heavy in her chest. She scrambles out of bed and turns them on, almost falling backward as the familiar words swirl onto the wall.

don't listen to that asshole

She sobs out a laugh—or laughs out a sob—and Chris makes a strangled noise too. She blindly holds out a hand and makes a grabbing motion and after a second the bed dips with Chris's weight.

"Ethan," he says, and his voice has gone all gravely, "I didn't—I never meant for—"

The words swirl again.

you either, i survived as long as i did because of that training

"You died in Louisiana," Chris can't help but mutter, apparently.

semantics

This time they both cry-laugh. Rose sniffles again and curls her arms around herself and her dad's jacket. "I really didn't mean to hurt him. I just—it just happened."

i know, sweetie

"From what it sounds like," Chris growls, "he had it coming."

i'd break his nose

"Could you? If I use my mold powers, could you help me break his nose?"

"Rose," Chris says but it sounds at most half-hearted.

probably not

Rose huffs. "Fine. Doesn't mean I ever want to see him again."

"You won't have to."

damn right

The feeling that isn't hers gets a little stickier, like sweet tree sap and suddenly it's hard to breathe which how much she just misses her dad. She sniffles and sobs again and she can feel him respond, wanting to help, which just makes it worse and Chris puts his hand on her shoulder.

"I miss you," she babbles, "I miss you so much."

i miss you too sweetie

After a moment the words swirl on one of her pillows and she doesn't even wait for the hug me to fully materialize before she's yanking the pillow into her lap and wrapping her arms around it as tightly as she can. Chris's hand stays on her shoulder, rubbing back and forth, and she leans against him just to have someone else to be next to. The words keep writing themselves over and over the pillow as she cries and this, this is all she wanted to do. She just wanted to hug her dad and be upset and have that be okay. Why couldn't that be okay? Why can't she just be like every other teenager that is upset and needs to be upset all by themselves, just for a little while, and then go hug someone to help them feel better? And when she starts to smell the faint wintry wood smoke and warm sunlight, she knows it's not real, but she doesn't care because that's her dad, that's her dad and he's dead and he's not here but he's right here and she loves him, she loves him so much, and he loves her and he stayed alive because he loves her and she's a part of him and he's a part of her and if she can just stay here, where she's hugging her dad and he's with her, everything might be alright.

It takes a while for her to cry out everything, but they have time.

The pillow is gross again when she finally lifts her head—Dad proudly proclaims himself ew again, which makes her and Chris laugh—and Chris gives her shoulder a squeeze.

"Do you want to go wash your face?"

"Yeah."

Her head's a little fuzzy and sore as she stumbles to the bathroom. She splashes cold water on her face and scrubs it a little, blowing out the last of the gross stuff and patting her face dry with the towel. There's another feeling in her chest that isn't hers, and it makes her linger in the bathroom for a little longer. She can hear muffled words from the other room.

Ah. Dad and Chris must be talking.

When the feeling turns sharper again, she opens the door slowly. Her stomach does a funny thing when she sees Chris hugging the pillow and Dad's words writing across it, and she makes a noise without realizing it. Chris jerks his head around to look at her, mouth opening to say something, but before he can, the words swirl.

come hug us sweetie

She doesn't hesitate. She runs across the room and wraps her arms around both of them. Chris catches her easily and scoops her into his lap again, the pillow sandwiched between them as Dad's words write across it. She tucks her head into the crook of Chris's neck. He holds her tightly.

"You're gonna be okay, Rose," Chris says, his voice a little thick, "I swear you're gonna be okay."

She wraps her arms tightly around them both and decides that this might, might, be better than getting ice cream.

Only a little, though.

[ac-liveblogs]

So if you want a real answer for went wrong in Boruto let me explain.

Boruto is pretty much written by people who really don't like Naruto as a series because it goes out of its way to shit on the Naruto series (taking away Naruto and Sasuke's power-ups at the first chance which basically reverted them to beginning of Naruto, Naruto and Sasuke). The editor for Boruto is apparently a simp for Sadara. They just really don't like Naruto as a series because:

He's apparently just a missing dad but you probably knew this already.

Absolutely no respect for Naruto characters whatsoever.

They hate ninjas because everything is now aliens and machinery in Boruto. Also, a lot of retconning Naruto stuff to be oh aliens are the reason this exists.

Orochimaru is just there and no one remembers he's not to be trusted.

There's apparently a dimension where one of the villains just has multiple ten-tails clones in there and its weird.

So yeah... I don't even want to know what the fuck happened. The kicker is that Kishimoto, from what I've heard has not been that active in Boruto. His editor pretty much runs the show is what I have heard a lot.

The most I've seen of Boruto was the movie, where Naruto being an absent parent was solved because Boruto just didn't realise how cool his dad was... I think. I just kinda left that movie gobsmacked. Don't you see how cool your dad is Boruto. And also 'jutsu in a can' is illegal in the Chuunin exams for some reason? Literally why, they're a tool you can use...

Thanks for the response, I appreciate the insight. I can see how some of these problems might have come around, like trying to balance Naruto and Sasuke's absolutely absurd power levels against literally any kind of threat, or coming up with an enemy for Konoha to fight that wouldn't leave a black mark on Naruto's reign as Hokage... and the inherent issue of 'no one is watching this for the new characters, they want to see the old ones, but this isn't about them' you'll inevitably get with a next-gen sequel.

No one watched Boruto the movie for Boruto. No one.

But like... why make a next-gen sequel for Naruto of all series? I get why from a 'we want money' sense, but I feel they could've just animated the light novels or fillers into eternity and people would've been happier with those.

"Here's 40 episodes of Kakashi and Itachi in ANBU" or something, I don't know. I'd watch 10 episodes of Sasori's descent into absolute madness.

Maybe the reason they went "ALIENS" is because of Kishimoto's failed sci-fi manga? But it's weird he's hands off given I thought he took over the manga from someone else...

Btw, to add onto what the anon that sent the I gave up on Boruto ask, its a bigger problem than it being the typical female characters don't matter still in Boruto. Its that no one matters in Boruto except Boruto and Kiwaki. Everyone else just gets shit on. Like imagine the old Naruto is x fanfics but actually made real. That's Boruto. He's got everything and he's the bestest and specialest boy.

:/ That sucks. Why bother forcing so many pairings to produce kids if you don't even wanna use 'em. Sasuke didn't deserve this. But also, how are you simultaneously a simp for Sarada and don't really use her? Just shove her in stupid outfits and call it a day...?

I still don't know anything about Kawaki!? He's a moon boy too, right? It feels so weird to neglect the rest of Boruto's team, though. What's the point.

Boruto does really feel like an edgy OC. He's got Byakugan+1 AND Sasuke is his teacher... honestly, Sasuke as a mentor to Naruto's kid is cute in theory, except for the part where he's also a deadbeat dad to a whole other child (his own).

I couldn't help reading TBV thinking "...why didn't they just do this kind of plot with Naruto himself or something". Though I guess they kind of? Did? With Road To Ninja? The opposite direction?

Btw, unless I'm mistaken I don't think Naruto actually forgave Orochimaru. I think he just forgot because Kishimoto forgot about a lot of what happened in part 1 of Naruto except Sasuke imo.

Incredible.

[aroace-rizgukgak]

As someone on the ace spectrum, is a qpr headcannon with the characters ok and doesn’t erase the aroace part of a character? I do headcannon Adaine and Riz being in a qpr so I would like to know if that erases anything. /gen

Look mate I'm not gonna tell you your evil for whatever you're headcanoning, I get where you're coming from with riz and adaine because of the whole living together thing, but I just don't see why "friends" isn't good enough. Obviously I can't stop you but it just doesn't make sense to me, it just feels like "the most acceptable relationship I can ship this aro character in". I'm not an authority or anything, just mad at aro erasure. You don't need to attempt justifying your headcanon to me. In general I just want this one aro character. I mean, I can't really give you a satisfying answer. I'm not going to say "I BESTOW ONTO YOU...PERMISSION TO SHIP THIS ARO CHARACTER IF ITS A QPR INSTEAD..." but im not gonna say "how DARE you that's EVIL" either

[sroloc--elbisivni]

Ok you win! You win, I read your amazing RotTMNT AU and now I want to know more about Usagi Yojimbo!!! Do you have any recommendations and also I would love to read your bibliography for that fic 😭🙏 your writing is ~superb~ it's so poetic and evocative aaaagh

GOT ANOTHER ONE, BOYS

welcome!! welcome!! come on in. Usagi canon isn't actually as intimidating as it looks--and I'm not saying this in the way often applicable to comics where that means 'only one flowchart is required to understand the reading order.' i think. There's only one major continuity, and two spinoffs in Space Usagi and Senso,* neither of which is required to understand the main order. Each issue is often overwhelmingly self-contained, so you can really pick up anything and start reading. The split comes in where the series being published at like. four different companies over the years. means that there are different publishing rights that change the way stuff comes out. technically we're at 38 trade volumes. thinking of it like that is the way madness lies.

The bulk of the series is collected in The Usagi Yojimbo Saga, a 10-volume set published out of Dark Horse. Each one is about as thick as a phonebook. This is not the beginning of the series, it technically starts with the overall series' volume 8, Shades of Death, but the first book of the Saga has a 4-page intro comic at the beginning that does very well setting the scene. This is where I started. I still think it's a great place to start because it's fun to go back to the origins with all the knowledge of the later books behind them. (Books 1-9 are in sequence; Usagi Yojimbo: Legends collects Senso, Space Usagi, and Yokai)

If you want to start at the very beginning, you need to look for Usagi Yojimbo, vol. 1: The Ronin. After Volume 7, Gen's Story, everything's published in the Saga.

The beginnings of the series are also collected in Usagi Yojimbo: Origins, which is a recent republishing of the early comics in full color. They've got four volumes--Volume 1,** Wanderer's Road, The Dragon Bellow Conspiracy, and Lone Goat and Kid. If you start here, you'll be switching over to series Vol. 6, Circles, after LGaK.

Once you get through the Saga, you're into IDW publishing territory, which so far has 5 trade volumes--Bunraku and Other Stories, Homecoming, Tengu War!, Crossroads, and The Green Dragon. That brings you up to the Ice and Snow issues, which just started publishing in September.

But quite honestly, given that the overall premise of the series is 'watch this man wander around the early Edo period experiencing Problems,' I really do think you can start anywhere in the grand tradition of 'what's at the library/comic shop' and have a good idea of the series.*** Have fun!

*Technically Chibi Usagi is a separate continuity, but I feel disingenuous putting it in the same category as Senso.

**No, it doesn't have a name. Yes, really.

***tbh between stories that are told As Flashbacks and how only about half the stories have things that squarely indicate exactly what the previous story was, I tend to assume that it goes in non-chronological order unless a story contains evidence otherwise. this opinion has gotten me booed. but i stand by it.

[ifyouknowmenahyoudontt]

I try to maintain the "protect my peace" mindset in this fandom but like it's getting so hard that I can't stand so much going on in this fandom, I don't want to be in this fandom anymore atp, like the racism, sexism, oversexualization, flanderization and more just make me so mad especially cuz it's coming from a fandom that claims to be so diverse and inclusive??? Being inclusive isn't always this great heroic thing if you're including to LOOK inclusive not BE inclusive. Bipoc people aren't these like exotic specimens that spice up your already OOC characters. You cant take our titles and nationalities, post them on you character and call it a day and not include culture differences or anything. You have to do research and be mindful or else you'll end up pushing harmful stereotypes!!!1 Mental illnesses arent meant to spice up a character, if you don't have that illness and dont know first hand what its like, PLEASE DON'T just paste it and a hc??? This should be common sense. The fetishization of the characters is a whole nother thing that I think prev anon touched upon well enough for me not to mention. Misogyny in this fandom which has a large female population is baffling to me, and this fandom feels like the marauders has turned into like euphoria or smth (not derogatory to euphoria, yes derogatory to this fandom) it's just abt horny teens in a school building. Let them be teens?? Let them focus in classes, let them have more platonic relations not everything has to be romantic, let people be mean, not everyone at school are besties??? Let there fights and drama??? Idk just let it be something other than hookup high where everyone finds there soulmate before they even turn 17??? Cuz at this point this isnt British school hogwarts Harry Potter earlier generation, its American ship focused gen z highschool drama. Dont even get me started on the flanderization of most characters and my boy Sirius...Sry for the rant I just feel so strongly abt this all 😞

i love the rant no worries

[vidreview]

VIDEO ESSAY ROUNDUP #6 [PART 2]

[originally posted august 1st 2024 NOTE: while migrating the archive from cohost i've discovered that tumblr has a 10 link-block limit, which means i have to split some of these roundups up in order to maintain the embeds. we love websites don't we folks]

"New Zelda isn't Zelda" by Eroymak.

it's novel to see one of these shot in the mountains! vibes like a younger, ganglier nakeyjakey. i like to imagine that there's an escalating war of spectacle happening between white outdoorsy middle-class nerds all trying to one-up each other by casually filming an otherwise anodyne video essay in increasingly precarious locales. how long until a 22 year old DJ from Wisconsin dies on the slopes of Everest trying to film an essay about Mario 1-1? who's going to be the first human being to levy a citation-heavy critique of Ayn Rand's The Fountainhead while skydiving? how long until Shiey accidentally loses Jacob Geller down an abandoned mine shaft? anyway, Eroymak is extremely correct here about what makes modern Zelda games a drag, namely that their "go anywhere do anything" attitude ruins the sense of progression that once defined the franchise. i worry about this with the upcoming Echoes of Wisdom, which seems to be applying the Of The games' open toolset philosophy to the 2D Zelda template, but i digress. for being only 7 minutes and 20 seconds, this is a pretty succinct and broadly comprehensive summation of why the open world Zeldas lack a certain magic that was once so easily flaunted by their forebears.

"so that's why they cut all her scenes from the movie" by CinemaStix.

i've seen CinemaStix videos in my recommended feed multiple times and avoided them like the plague. i mean, come on. "CinemaStix"? at a glance this conjures a monstrous Third-Way chimera betwixt CinemaSins and CinemaWins, and i would sooner stave my own head in with a rock than give such a thing the time of day. EXCEPT… Constantine 2005 is one of my favorite comic book movies. i saw it in theaters and it changed me. in the years since, i've defended Constantine's honor from the haters to little avail (thankfully the tides have turned in recent years and people are realizing that they totally missed the second-best John Wick movie), and it's top of my list of fun movies to show guests when we're bored. this special interest overrode my kneejerk book-cover judgment survival mechanism, and i'm so mad that i don't regret it. this video is about the editing of Constantine 2005, and how many of the film's iconic moments were constructed in post. as the title suggests, a substantial amount of time is spent trying to understand why an entire character was ultimately cut, a question that's also plagued me ever since watching the deleted scenes on the DVD in 10th grade. whether you've seen Constantine 2005 or not, this is an excellent portrait of editing as a substantive authorial process. i've since gone and watched multiple CinemaStix videos, and god damn it, these are some quality essays. sometimes popular things are good, she said grumpily.

"Conservative Comedy Ruined My Life" by Big Joel.

oops, can you tell this vidrev roundup has been sitting in my drafts for a long time? this video came out on April 2nd of 2024 and has nearly 2.5 million views, so i won't belabor the point. this is a great deconstruction of conservative comedy that looks hard into why so much of it sucks beyond the empty platitudes endemic to smarmy liberals. it's some of Big Joel's best work in my opinion.

"On Online Entitlement" by CJ The X.

an excellent autopsy of the rhetorical implications of an overly familiar instagram comment-- a description that i know probably sounds obnoxious, but genuinely is not the case. Mx. The X goes to great lengths to assure us that this is not about the person who left the comment, but the various attitudes and assumptions that are implied in its construction. gen z essayists in particular seem to specialize in this sort of editorial post-game breakdown of the things people say when they think they're saying something else, and i think they're always worth paying attention to. consider this something of a downstream epilogue to Shannon Strucci's seminal Fake Friends series. even as i don't always agree with the totality of their conclusions, i do always come away from CJ The X videos feeling like i've learned something about how i and other internet-dwelling social animals think.

"How Uber Is Destroying Food Delivery" by More Perfect Union.

More Perfect Union is not typically in the business of video essays, focusing more on feature stories that heavily rely on interviews and on-the-ground reporting. this one's a unique development in that it is just straight up a video essay, using the business model of Uber as an avenue for understanding Corey Doctorow's theory of platform decay (except he calls it Enshittification because god forbid 21st century materialist philosophy grow out of its twee blogosphere adolescence). if you know the theory then there's probably not gonna be much here that surprises you, but i felt it a notable inclusion nevertheless.

do you have recommendations for video essays i might not have seen, new or old? well my askbox is open and i'm always looking for ways to penetrate my experiential-algorithmic youtube bubble. hope you found something enjoyable in this collection, see you in the next one!

<- ROUNDUP #5