#this might be pointless but im certainly trying to be... open?... about it until it fails | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

shoutaaizawas · 5 years ago

Note

one month anniversary event? hUH can i join?? if it’s no hassle: could i request bakugou in hunger games au! with the prompt “Whatever you do, don’t open your eyes.”? i would love to see what you do, thank you in advance 🥺💞 i love your work, binge worthy 100%. please take care! :)

im so sorry this took FOREVER ilysm your comments give me life thank you for all your support

↳ bakugou katsuki x reader → no final goodbyes

event: au prompts summary: you and bakugou are childhood enemies. when you’re picked for the annual hunger games you’re shocked when he volunteers. word count: 6,599 tags/warnings: hunger games!au, angst, like really angsty 😳, violence, blood mention, character death a/n: uhhhh i’m sorry also there was so much i wanted to put but i had to stop myself or this would have been a whole novel alternate ending

You hated Bakugou Katsuki. You had since you were kids. You grew up in District Seven next door to the Bakugou household. Ever since you could remember you were arguing with Bakugou. Your parents would laugh and say it was normal if he got on your nerves so much maybe it was because you had a crush on him.

The thought had always disgusted you. Sure, as you both got older Bakugou certainly got quite attractive and filled out. He went from a scrawny kid to a man in what felt like overnight, it was hard not to notice his muscles.

You recalled one day you were trying to nap but the repeated sound of banging outside kept waking you. You stormed outside to yell at him but you were not expecting the sight of him shirtless and swinging an ax down onto firewood. Your throat felt like it was drying up and you turned around before he caught you.

When had he gotten attractive? It didn’t matter, he was still the same unbearable Bakugou you had known since you were born. Looks couldn't make up for that personality.

Despite your distaste for each other, Bakugou’s mother insisted he walk with you to school to watch over you. You would complain and say that it was unnecessary but your mother would scold you for being rude and tell you to just accept it.

Some days you’d walk to and from school in silence. Others you would trade insults the whole way earning looks from people you passed.

“They’re picking tributes soon.” You said. It was rare for you to start a normal conversation but the Hunger Games were fast approaching and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t scared. “We’re eighteen now, it’s our last one. It looks like we might make it out.” You said with a dry laugh.

“What are you scared or something?” He replied.

“What? No, I mean what are the chances of getting picked?” You said with a shrug. “You’re probably the one that's scared.” You bit back. So much for having a normal conversation with him.

Time flew by and it was finally the day of the Reaping.

If you thought it was silent before on your walks with Bakugou it was even worse today. Despite the fact you both pretended like you weren’t scared, you were terrified and you knew even Bakugou was nervous.

If he was chosen at least he would stand a chance. He was strong and she had seen how he fought others at school in the past. If it was between him and a trained district kid you’d bet on him every time.

You, on the other hand, you never had held a weapon in your life. You weren’t very strong and not very fast. Your chances were overall bad.

Bakugou stopped as you approached the place where you would go your separate ways.

“Our last one, after this we don’t have to worry.” You said forcing a smile.

“Whatever.” He scoffed before turning to walk to the boy's side.

“I was trying to be nice for once.” You complained. “Screw you, I hope you get picked.”

You might hate Bakugou but you didn’t mean it. In fact, the thought of him getting picked made you feel things you couldn’t explain. After this was over you’d walk home and complain about the boring life you’d have in District Seven and bask in the relief of knowing that you would be safe.

As the escort of District Seven stood on the stage you stood in the crowd tapping your foot. This would be over soon and you could go home and never worry about this again.

“Ladies first.” The woman said fluttering to the left side and drawing from the pool of names there. She opened the paper and announced the name.

Heads turned but one set of eyes burned into you more than others. You couldn’t breathe. You were suffocating, drowning, frozen to the ground. You turned to look at Bakugou from across the crowd. Staring at him, helpless with tears in your eyes. You didn’t know why he was the first person you sought out.

“Come on, dear. Don’t be shy!” The woman said waving you up to the stage.

Taking shaky steps you walked through everyone to the stairs. Standing up there was surreal. It felt like a nightmare. Your eyes stayed on Bakugou’s red ones, how odd you looked to him for comfort in the worst time of your life. You supposed this would be the last time you’d look into those familiar eyes. Why did that make you so sad?

The woman moved to the boy's side and pulled a name but you could hardly pay attention. You snapped out of your fog when you heard a familiar voice.

“I volunteer!” Your eyes snapped to the ash-blond you had known your whole life. What was he thinking?

Bakugou walked to the stage and you stared in disbelief. What was going on?

It was a blur, you were ushered into a room with your parents. They were sobbing, hugging you, holding you like it’d be the last time. Well, it would be the last time, you supposed.

You were led to a train, the inside was decorated far nicer than most things in your district. You sat there feeling numb. It was overwhelming enough being picked but you were trying to wrap your head around Bakugou. Why would he volunteer? None of you ever wanted to be picked. This wasn’t District One where people trained for it.

Bakugou entered and stared at you blankly. You don’t know what happened but something snapped in you.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” You screamed, lunging for him. The escort for your district was quick to make her way to the other side of the train car to avoid the commotion. “Why would you volunteer? Do you have some death wish!?”

You grabbed at his shirt, hitting his chest but he stood still and unmoving not saying a word.

“What about your parents? What about your future? You’re throwing it all away!! It’s bad enough I got picked I didn’t have a choice.” Tears ran down your face uncontrollably. “You had a choice! You had a choice!”

A man you hadn’t seen before pulled you off of Bakugou, leading you to one of the rooms on the train.

“Cool off here for a while.” The man with long black hair said. “It’s a lot to take in. Take your time processing it.”

With that, he closed the door. You laid on the bed, your throat raw from screaming. It didn’t take long for your tears to come. You sobbed and sobbed, curled up on the bed. Why did this happen?

By the time you woke up you hadn’t even realized that you fell asleep. You felt so exhausted. It was still hard to understand everything that had happened. How did you get picked, why could Bakugou volunteer?

You avoided him, not wanting to see him. Every time you thought about him it stirred a rage in you that you didn’t quite understand.

The man that had pulled you off of Bakugou introduced himself as Aizawa Shouta, he was a previous winner from your district. Even though he had won you could see the damage that it left on him. That scared you, even people who won looked miserable.

Aizawa explained that he was to mentor you both and help as much as he could to prepare you for the games. It still didn’t feel real as he explained it all.

Before you knew it you were in the capital, a place you never expected to see. It was big and fancy, far more developed than your district. You followed alongside Aizawa, Bakugou on his other side. You didn’t want to look at him but you still felt the urge to sneak glances at him. When you did his eyes were on you, once you realized that you would look away quickly as if you hadn't been looking in the first place.

The building you were to stay in until the games began were modern and high tech. You stayed in your room, even when you were told dinner was ready. You wanted to be alone, more than that you didn’t want to be around Bakugou.

A knock on the door caught your attention. You cautiously opened it to see Aizawa there with a plate of food. He handed you the plate and you let him in.

“Why won’t you come out for dinner?” He asked.

“I don’t want to see him.” You said, taking a bite of the food even though you didn’t have an appetite. The food was of better quality than anything your family could ever afford. Did they feel better if they spoiled the children before sending them to their deaths?

“He volunteered.” He said the way he said it implied that he knew something that you didn’t.

“Yeah, and that was stupid.” You said. “Why would he choose a death sentence.”

“Things aren’t always that simple.” He said.

You stared at him, trying to comprehend what that meant. What valid motivation could he have?

“I’ll let you get some rest but you have training tomorrow.” He said.

“Training?” You questioned.

“Yeah, you'll have time to train for the games. You should pick something to impress the judges so they’ll give you a good rating.” He said. “If you get a good rating people will support you, send you stuff to help during the game.”

“Oh.” You said. You had seen some of it on TV but you always tried to avoid watching most of it. It made you sick to see children sent off to their deaths. You had seen people you grew up with sent to the games. You supposed you’d have to do the interviews too. How were you supposed to pretend to be some charming person when you were just a lamb for the slaughter?

Days went on and you trained from morning to night, you weren’t strong but you tried to practice with some weapons. An ax felt familiar you used it to chop wood before. It felt pointless, even if you could use it well enough you knew you didn’t have it in you to kill someone. You had no chance.

You spent a lot of time studying the plants, it interested you even if it would only help you so much. There were a lot of plants that were good for healing and some were even dangerous.

Reading a book on herbology, you sat far away from the other tributes who were sparring and throwing weapons at targets. It was hard to focus knowing that you’d be their target in a few days.

“Why are you wasting your time with that?” A familiar voice said behind you.

“It’s none of your business.” You spat back at Bakugou.

“Plants aren’t going to keep you from getting a knife in your back.”

“Why are you even here? How stupid are you to volunteer?”

“I’m going to win. I win at everything I do.” He said.

You stared at him in disbelief. You knew that Bakugou strives to beat everyone in his way but he never expressed that in regards to the Hunger Games. He always acted the way you did and how most did. They were disgusting and you wanted to avoid them as much as possible.

You turned your attention away from him, you couldn’t deal with him. You didn’t have long before the games would begin. You had to focus on what you were doing for the judges, not that it mattered. You knew you couldn’t compare to the others. You didn’t have much of a chance.

For the judges you displayed your knowledge of plants, it wouldn’t get you a great score but it was better than doing nothing. They seemed barely interested so you didn’t expect much.

Sitting on the couch of the apartment you were staying at with Bakugou and Aizawa you weren’t shocked to see yourself get a four. You heard a scoff from Bakugou and you sent him a dirty look. You were shocked to see Bakugou get a twelve. You knew that he was strong and his willpower alone was enough to make him the best at everything he did but it still left you wondering just what he did to get that score.

Time passed quickly and before you knew it the interviews were up. It was the last big event before the games would begin. That made your stomach churn. It wouldn’t be long until you’d be in an arena and everyone there would want you dead. There hadn’t been a day since you arrived in the capital that you weren’t stuck in your head dreading what would come. It was almost impossible to sleep and even harder to stomach anything.

Your stylist had picked a deep forest green dress for you. It was elaborate and stunning. Staring at it on the mannequin, the dress reminded you of home. The forests that were damp and earthy that always felt right to be in. The hearth in your family’s home that kept you warm on the cold nights. The stews that your mother made that you loved so much. The rain against your window at night while you read your favorite book. The boy next door that no matter how much you fought with him there was a sense of comfort being at his side.

Everything that you would never see again. Tears streamed down your face and you pretended they weren’t there as you were helped into the dress.

Your interview was first. Your entrance was standard, the questions not very exciting. It was easy to feel that the crowd wasn’t very interested in you. How could you capture their interest? You knew you were just another face, just a background character in someone else's story.

Bakugou was after you, the noise of the host and him talking was in the background as you walked with Aizawa out of the backstage area.

“You volunteered and you from District Seven, that’s very rare. What could possibly make you do something like that.” The host questioned. You scoffed, you already knew his answer. ‘Because I’ll win.’ You could hear it perfectly in his voice.

“Because the girl I love was chosen.” He said. You must have misheard that. You turned to look at the screen and saw him sitting on the couch on stage looking far more dressed up than you had ever seen him in your life.

“The girl you love, and by that do you mean your district partner?” The host asked excitedly looking at the crowd as if they hadn’t heard.

“Yes, we grew up with each other. I lived next door to her, we spent everyday walking to and from school. No matter how much we teased each other or pretended we didn’t like each other I always cared about her. When I heard her name called I knew that I couldn’t watch her do this alone. I volunteered so I can protector her, and make sure she gets to make it home.” He said.

“Wow, what an amazing story. Doesn’t it tug on your heartstrings? We all wish you luck in the games.” The host said as Bakugou was ushered away.

Numbness was all you felt. His words rang in your head. Aizawa looked at you with a concerned expression.

How could he lie like that? Just so he would have the viewers on his side? Just so he would have more sponsors in the game feeling sympathy for his sob story.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” You started as Bakugou walked down the hall towards you. He gave you a blank stare. “I know you couldn’t care less about me but did you really have to involve me in your story to manipulate the viewers?”

Bakugou stared at you before moving past without a word. You had expected him to yell at you or argue that it only made sense to use every advantage you could get but his silence was unsettling.

It was a blur. It was the day of the games. You stood in a cold room staring at the elevator that would lift you into the arena. This was it. It probably wouldn’t be long until you were dead. Taking a deep breath you took in the clothing you were provided. The heavy coat was large and made you feel too warm in this small room. From what you could gather it was going to be cold in the arena. At least you were used to snow. The best thing you had going for you was your survival skills if you could get away from the blood bath without dying.

Aizawa was there to give you your last bits of advice. The biggest being to avoid the cornucopia, it was always guaranteed to be a blood bath where only the strongest came out on top. Aizawa advised you to take what minor supplies you could get and hide away from others until necessary.

There was a far off look in his eyes. It was easy to tell that he was trying to distance himself emotionally. No doubt it was hard to get to know two kids every year only to watch them die horrifically.

“Thank you for everything.” You said softly.

“Goodbye.” He said giving you a sad smile.

A timer had begun counting down as you entered the elevator. Pressing your eyes closed you took a deep breath. A part of you considered if going for the cornucopia would be the best way to end things quickly. You shook your head. You owed it to your family, to yourself to at least try even if it was only delaying the inevitable.

The elevator started to move and an opening appeared at the ceiling. Cold air flooded the space and you were glad you were dressed the way you were. As you entered the arena you took in your surroundings. At least two feet of snow blanketed everything in sight. Most of the space around was open but in the distance, there was a forest. Mountains and cliff sides lingered in the distance.

The cornucopia sat not far away, surrounded by different items. It was tempting but it was a setup. You glanced towards the forest, it would be the best option. The cover of the trees would help you hide away from the others.

Looking around the others surrounding you, you recognized them all. You knew which ones you should be careful of. Your eyes met Bakugou’s and your stomach dropped. Once you ran away would you ever see him again? Your last words to him hadn’t been kind. Would he win? Or would he be killed by another tribute? What would he do if it was only the both of you remaining? Would he kill you? You knew you could never hurt him.

The clock ticked and with each sound, your heart beat faster and faster.

Run. Just run. Don’t look back.

The clock hit zero and chaos broke out. You fled for the trees not sparing a look back. The snow was deep and hard to move through, thankfully you were used to the snow. You weren’t expecting to find a backpack in the snow. You grabbed it without stopping as you ran to the trees.

Once you were in the tree line you felt some relief but you knew others would have the same idea so you continued not slowing your pace. You ran and ran until you couldn’t go anymore. You spotted a tree with strong looking branches and figured it was a decent place to hide for now.

Climbing the tree you were able to get comfortable as possible so you could look through the backpack. In it were some supplies, rations, water, rope, and a few other things.

The biggest concern for survival would be cold. It was cold now and it would only get worse. Your clothing would keep you warm but it might not be enough. You waited, carefully listening to the forest and its sounds. Eventually, nightfall came and the canons went off announcing the number of deaths that had occurred for the day. Fifteen in total. More than half gone already. She wondered if they thought they could survive the cornucopia or if they had gone to it in hopes of ending things quickly. When you didn’t see Bakugou’s face among them you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding.

As much as you knew you needed to you couldn’t sleep. You knew the danger you were in. As the temperature dropped you wished you could make a fire but you knew it was too risky to do so.

Morning came and you wanted to hunt today, you had the rations from the backpack but you wanted to keep them as a backup if you couldn’t get food. The skill wasn’t unfamiliar, you had done it before just not with these tools. There was a hatchet in the backpack, it wasn’t normally used to hunt but you could make it work.

You had been able to kill a rabbit, making a small fire to cook it before putting it out and moving on. As night fell you made your way into another tree for the night. You accidentally fell asleep a few times throughout the night before startling awake.

Days passed and you couldn’t remember the last time you felt any warmth. Tributes died day by day, none of them were Bakugou. That was a relief and it made you nervous at the same time. You didn’t want to face him.

The landscape before you was beautiful, you had scaled one of the smaller parts of the mountain. It was risky but if you got higher up you hoped it would deter other tributes from finding you. Green pine trees covered the ground as far as you could see. It reminded you of home. You pushed that thought out of your mind before it brought you any more sorrow.

As you moved through some of the dense trees on the mountain you weren’t expecting to come upon the edge of a cliff. You stumbled, pulling back so that you wouldn’t fall but it was too late. Your gravity was off and there was no way to stop yourself now. You reached out hopelessly to catch anything to stop yourself from falling. What you weren’t expecting was for someone’s hand to grasp yours. You were pulled back to safety as you came face to face with Bakugou.

“Idiot, watch where you’re going!” He said staring at you with an angry expression.

“Bakugou?” You said in confusion, why was he here? Had he been following you. “You know it’s not a great tactic to save your enemies from dying. Kind of losing out on a free loss.”

“I don’t want to win the loser’s way.” He grunted before letting go of you, you nearly fell to the ground.

“Really, why are you here?” You questioned.

“Because it’s a good place to be, if you’re the first one in these mountains you’ll have the high ground.” He answered. “We might as well as team up since we’re both here. The others have made alliances.”

“I’m not really helpful for an alliance, you should know that.” You said, sitting down on the ground to get your breath back. Your heart was still pounding from the adrenaline.

“Better than nothing.” He said before sitting down next to you.

The silence was odd. In a way it was so similar to all the times you walked to school in silence, forgoing the usual trade of insults. But it was different all at the same time. You weren’t going about your normal day, you were in the middle of an even that would leave one if not both of you dead.

“I still don’t get why you volunteered. Even if you win it’s not worth it.” You said to him. Even if you received money and everything else they gave was it worth the risk? Was it worth the trauma you’d be left with?

“You don’t have to understand.” He said. That left you with more questions than answers but you didn’t push further.

Taking the day you made your way into the mountains more, as night fell you stopped to make camp. You were unsure about making a fire but Bakugou didn’t seem too concerned.

“Here.” He said throwing a sleeping bag at you. You had noticed the good-sized backpack he had on when you met earlier. You wondered if he had managed to get anything from the cornucopia but you didn’t ask. Were any of the people that were killed on the first day killed by him? It was hard to imagine him taking someone's life.

“Thank you.” You said. You were thankful for the sleeping bag, it would be a lot better than the trees you had stayed in all night.

“I’ll take first watch.” He said. You wanted to argue but you were so tired from the lack of sleep that you gave in.

It was odd the sense of safety you had with Bakugou. A part of you said that he could slit your throat while you slept but you knew deep down he wouldn’t. If he was going to kill you he would be straight forward about it. You fell asleep without hesitation.

You returned to consciousness quickly, the sensation of someone’s hand pressed against your mouth. Your eyes opened up and you realized that it wasn’t Bakugou but another tribute. You tried to scream but it was muffled. Moving for your hatchet you realized that they had you fully pinned down. Tears burned in your eyes as you stared up at them.

“Get off of her!” You heard Bakugou yell. You wondered where he had been.

“Why would I do that?” The guy said, you felt the cold steel of a blade press against your neck and you let out a whimper.

“Whatever you do, don’t open your eyes,” Bakugou said and you knew he was talking to you. Without thinking you listened.

With a yelp of pain, the guy tumbled off of you, and a weight was lifted from your chest both literally and figuratively. There was a noise of a commotion, rustling, and grunts of pain before everything went silent. A moment passed and the sound of a canon rang out in the arena.

“Just wait here, don’t look.” He said. You knew what had happened but it was hard to believe. There was more sound, footsteps, the sound of something being dragged before more footsteps. “Okay.”

Opening your eyes you could see Bakugou in the moonlight, standing over you. What stood out was the blood that covered his hands and his jacket, barely reflecting in the glow.

“T-Thank you.” You stuttered out, still scared. You knew that you would die here but coming face to face with death was worse than you imagined. “I-I” You started but tears ran down your face.

The last thing you expected was for him to kneel and take you in his arms. Your first reaction was to stiffen, was he going to kill you? When you felt him gently place you head against his chest you realized he was hugging you. As much as you wanted to push him away or argue you felt so vulnerable after what happened. You slowly wrapped your arms around him before letting loose more tears.

“You’re okay. It’s going to be okay.” He said. You had only seen this side of him once before.

When you were young you had been in the forest behind your houses, playing like you did often. It had been an accident, you weren’t looking. You jumped off a rock into a pile of leaves, playing in them. What you didn’t expect was there to be a bear trap.

The pain was so bad you had nearly blacked out. You remembered how panicked he was, rushing to your side. He disarmed the trap faster than you expected and before you knew it he was carrying you home.

The memories of it were vague from the pain and time but what stuck in your head was the soft voice he used reassuring you everything was going to be alright and the tears that welled up in his eyes.

By the time you woke up in bed bandaged up Bakugou was back to his normal self, no hint of the teary-eyed boy you had seen. A part of you always wondered if that had been your imagination trying to soothe you through the traumatic moment.

The softness Bakugou showed you know made it clear that your memory had not been incorrect. Hands gripping into his jacket he held you until your tears stopped and the sun slowly rose in the sky.

He explained that he had heard a noise and went off to look for the source and when he returned the other tribute had been on you. He didn’t apologize but you could hear the guilt in his voice. These events had just furthered your confusion about everything.

Once there was enough light you ate some rations before packing up and heading further up the mountain. Your travel was silent for the most part but every once and a while you would talk.

The number of tributes was getting lower every day. Not counting you and Bakugou there were three others left. Honestly, you hadn’t expected to make it this long. You wouldn’t have made it this long if it wasn’t for Bakugou saving you last night.

“What are you going to do if it gets down to just the two of us?” You asked, your breath appearing in the cold air.

“Why are you asking such a stupid question?” He grunted back at you.

“I think it’s a fair question.” You said. Did his avoidance of it mean that it was obvious he would kill you?

“Don’t worry about it.”

“I think the quickly approaching reality is something I should worry about.” You returned. “Unless you think I’ll die before then.”

“You might with how clumsy you are, idiot.” He said, not even sparing you a glance as his eyes scanned the snowy trail.

“Even on death’s door, you’re going to give me that attitude?” You said annoyed. “Bakugou Katsuki, you are the most insufferable person I’ve ever met.”

The sound of a canon went off stopping your conversation. Just a second later another one went off. You took a shaky breath. There was only one other tribute left.

Looking over at Bakugou you caught his gaze, you didn’t miss the nervous look in his eyes no matter how hard he tried to hide it.

“One left.” You whispered to yourself.

That night you set up a small camp in the mouth of a cave. You couldn’t bring yourself to eat anything, the nerves were too much. It was almost over, how had you made it into the top three? Would the last tribute kill you both? Or would Bakugou kill the last tribute? Then what?

It came crashing down on you even harder than it had before. Someone had to die. You and Bakugou wouldn’t make it out together, there was only ever one winner. Tears streamed down your face before you recognized them.

Bakugou Katsuki had been a constant in your life, a constant you always thought that you hated but sitting here confronting the idea of him dying tore you apart. You cared about him more than you would ever like to admit. Even if you argued more than anything else Bakugou always looked after you. If someone was mean to you at school he would scare them off, if you got hurt he would patch you up even if he did make fun of you the whole time, he was always there for you no matter what.

Why had life decided to be so unfair to you?

A day passed and you hiked further into the mountains, there had been no sign of the other tribute. That made you nervous, you knew that the game maker wanted a show and if he didn’t get one the would do what they thought would make things interesting and it wouldn’t be good for you.

Passing through a dense forest you felt on edge. You knew something bad would happen but you didn’t know what exactly it would be. You felt like something was watching like you were being hunted. Glancing at Bakugou you knew he was on edge too.

A crack of thunder rang out. You knew with how suddenly it hit it wasn’t natural. Suddenly rain poured down, with how cold it was you knew it would be bad if you got soaked.

“We need to find cover,” Bakugou said looking to you.

The two of you picked up your pace into a run, searching for anything that would work. You spotted a cave opening, it was dangerous to be in a confined space but you would only be in more danger out here. The storm hit harder and harder with every passing moment. Lightning striking nearby and thunder rumbled the ground around you.

You tripped, landing on your knees. Bakugou pulled you up by the back of your jacket and back onto your feet. This time he took your hand into yours pulling you along.

Finally, you reached the cave, the shelter from the storm providing some relief. You looked at Bakugou and without saying anything you both knew this was a trap. Opening your backpack you pulled out the flashlight that was in there. Turning it on you were able to see your surroundings better.

“Let’s go in further,” Bakugou said looking around. “Be careful, we don’t know if they’re in here or if they’ll be behind us.”

The cave wasn’t spacious but the tunnel you followed went deeper in. It was eerily silent, the only sound was from the storm outside. You don’t know how long it took but eventually, it opened up to a large cavern. There was an opening in the ceiling of the cave letting in icy cold air and the rain that poured down but overall it was enough to cover from the storm.

“It’s a dead end.” You said looking around.

“So we wait.” He said.

Bakugou paced the cavern, walking around different parts of it surveying the space.

It happens quickly, you hear a noise and suddenly Bakugou is on the ground under the last tribute. A knife is at his throat as he struggles to hold it back. Fear grips you at the sudden occurrence.

For a moment you’re frozen, your body won’t move even if your head is screaming at you to help. You finally break free and rush forward, you tackle the tribute off of Bakugou and onto the ground of the cavern.

It’s messy, you struggle and fight but the tribute is far stronger than you and easily throws you off before regaining his balance and attacking.

Bakugou watches in horror as the tribute overtakes you. He moves forward, knife in hand this time. He blocks out the reality of what he has to do, driving the blade down into his back repeatedly. He pulls him off of you, throwing him to the side.

As the canon goes off he blocks out the fact that it’s just the two of you left. He knows what he has to do but he can’t bring himself to think about it yet. He wants to enjoy the last moments of peace.

“Katsuki.” You say but your voice is ragged. He’s taken aback at the use of his first name. “Don’t look.”

His stomach drops as he realizes the blood soaking through your coat isn’t the tribute's. He panics, dropping to his knees beside you tearing open your coat trying to find the wound.

“No, it wasn’t supposed to happen like this.” He said pressing against the wound trying to stop the bleeding.

“You’re going to win just like you wanted.” You replied.

“You idiot!” He yells. “I didn’t volunteer to win, I did it to protect you!”

He watches your face fall at the realization.

“You-”

“I couldn’t stand the thought of you going through this alone, if you died I would never forgive myself for not being there. I volunteered to make sure that you would make it out alive!”

“Why?” Your voice was breathless, eyes tearing up.

“Because I love you, idiot!” He yelled. “How stupid are you?”

“Katsuki, I-” You started, your breathes heavily as you tried to speak. “I-” You tried to speak but your eyelids fell closed, consciousness fading.

“No! I’m not gonna lose you. You can’t die, I did this to keep you safe!” He screamed. “I did this to protect you! Why did you try to help me! I was supposed to die for you!”

Tears ran down his face as he screamed out. A canon went off and it felt like he had been stabbed. He collapsed into you, sobbing into your stomach.

The games came to a close. They retrieved Bakugou but he fought tooth and nail to keep the peacekeepers away that tried to take him away from your body. The only option they were left with was to sedate him.

Once Bakugou woke up they tried to explain to him that he would have to do an interview at the capitol as well as make appearances in all of the districts. Their words fell on deaf ears as he refused to listen to anyone, trying to attack anyone who got close enough. They finally decided to send Aizawa in.

“Bakugou, you need to be reasonable.” He said. “If you don’t listen they will kill you and tell everyone that it was from your injuries in the games.”

“I have nothing to live for, the only reason I did any of this was to make sure she won and I failed and now I have to live with that.” He spits back.

“I know,” Aizawa said solemnly. “I’m sorry, I know you did everything to protect her.”

“If they want to kill me then let them.”

“Please, at least let me see if they will let you go home without any media. We can say that you got sick from something in the arena and had to be sent home.”

Bakugou didn’t reply but Aizawa took that as a yes.

Stepping into the empty house Bakugou felt numb. Aizawa had managed to get him home without any more disturbance. The capital was in an upset without the media the thrived off of after the Games. Many people were looking forward to the tearful remembrance of you. The capitol had been enthralled by the love story between you and Bakugou.

What was the point anymore? Looking out the window to the yard, it was rainy and foggy. He couldn’t bring himself to care about anything. He hadn’t even seen his parents since he got back to District Seven.

It haunted him, watching you die. Your stuttered last words cut off by your last breath. Did you love him back? It was something he would never have an answer to and he would have to live with that for the rest of his life.

alternate ending

taglist: @sugarmaplewings-fics @lilkiwisfinest @ewwis @kandy1410 @moonlightaangel @winnies-headcannons @bakugousidehoe @paintedr0ses1 @toobsessedsstuff @spellboundxizi @ourladyofseijoh @x0doodlebug0x @katsuhoee

#bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #katsuki x reader #bakugo katsuki x reader #bakugo x reader #bnha x reader #mha x reader #bnha #mha #my writing #bakugou katsuki #angst #bakugousidehoe

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taexual · 6 years ago

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HOLIC - 48 | jb x reader

pairing: Im Jaebum x Reader

genre: enemies to lovers au | roommate au

warnings: angst

words: 3.4k

disclaimer: i do not own the gif, please let me know if it belongs to you, so i can give proper credit

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The next few days passed by surprisingly quickly. You’ve set your mind on a fair number of things and finally relieved yourself of some of the exhausting doubts that have clouded your mind for as long as you could remember. Most importantly, you’d decided to quit your job at the gallery – and, thus, began your last week of work before you moved on, diving head-first into the dark unknown.

Knowing that you wouldn’t have to work there anymore and no longer having to stress out about your potential exhibition made every morning much easier as you no longer had to spend the first fifteen minutes after waking up cursing at every inanimate object in your way. On top of that, although plunging yourself into the abyss of uncertainty was relatively scary, you still felt alive with excitement. Not to mention, now you had much more time to find a new job, all while rehearsing the words you were going to say to Jaebum once Jackson finally called you with a way for you two to meet.

You had decided to start to work on a new version of yourself but, first, you needed to fix your relationship with Jaebum. That was the only broken thing from your past that you wanted to take into the future with you. No, “wanted” didn’t quite describe it – needed, perhaps. You needed this relationship to continue because you were afraid of your life without it. You were waiting for Jaebum to make the choice of where to go from here but, even though the reins were in his hands, you weren’t going to stop fighting for the one solid thing on an otherwise rocky foundation of your life.

This determination was a relatively new feeling for you but it was the only feeling that you were certain about. If, like Jaebum, you had to pick the most prominent emotion that you were feeling and put it into your art, you’d have picked the overflowing love and inserted it into all things around you until your surroundings were screaming as loud as your heart was.

Thinking of Jaebum was what made the wait for Jackon’s call so difficult. You went on with your life – or, tried to – choosing to busy yourself with work instead of sulking, but you couldn’t help but feel your mind wander back to him again. It was like the aforementioned love always pulled your thoughts towards him, never letting your mind stray from him for too long.

And that was how, after convincing Eva that you weren’t going to change your mind about quitting, you finished your day at work, and found yourself looking at the pictures of Jaebum you’ve taken on the day he brought you to Jackson’s studio for the first time. Looking at them brought back all the memories, especially accentuating the fight you and him had had before he gave in and finally played “Don’t Touch Me” to you.

You’d both done and said some awful things to each other that night and you could still recall how much Jaebum’s doubts about you made your chest sting. What made it hurt even more, however – actually, so much more, that for one passing moment, you thought you were having a real heart attack – was Jaebum’s confession that he was terrified of himself around you because he wasn’t thinking. Because he forgave and forgot, and kept giving you second chances every time you did something that raised red flags in his overly-alert mind.

The memory made it hard to breathe all of a sudden.

You’d been so angry and so upset with him for saying those things – for even thinking that you’d ever treat him in any way that he didn’t deserve – and then you made his fears come true by omitting the truth. By selecting which parts of your life you wanted him in. By lying, just like he was afraid you would.

Closing your laptop shut, you got up from the bed and left your room as you tried to breathe in through your nose and exhale through your mouth. It was a pathetic attempt to calm down, really, because it seemed as though your heart was now a whole separate being that was powered by your anxiety and had promptly gone into overdrive.

Breathing exercises didn’t help. Drinking water didn’t help. Lying down made it even worse.

It was the sort of wave of suffering and self-hate that you could have only been saved from if someone told you that everything was going to be okay. No, not someone—him. But he wasn’t here and it didn’t seem like it was going to be okay – hence why you were nearly shedding your skin as you tried to find a way to break out of the paralyzing chains of pain.

You’ve lived through the past few days worried and anxious but still in control. You’ve lived hoping and anticipating your conversation with Jaebum. You’ve considered what you were going to say. You’ve even rehearsed it all. But the consequences of your words is what pained you now.

You haven’t given Jaebum’s response any thought. You had set your mind on explaining yourself to him and giving him enough time and space to decide what he wanted to do but now the raw grips of panic were tearing you into pieces just at the thought of Jaebum choosing not to do this anymore. And the worst part was, you didn’t think it was fair for you to keep on fighting if he gave this up. He was just as mature as you were and he had certainly thought about this as much as you have – what would you even say if he told you to leave?

He had every right to let your relationship go because he deserved one where he would never be put in a situation like this. You didn’t think you had a right to search for ways to make him stay with you if your behavior proved to make him suffer. If you turned out to be as toxic for him as the girl you’d tried so desperately to save him from.

Suddenly, it felt like this was the last time you were standing in your kitchen. And, in a way, you were glad. You felt trapped here, in this room. You felt just as trapped in your own body – but the helpless feeling was slowly fading. Searching for an empty glass inside one of the kitchen counters calmed your heartrate down, replacing the desperate wave of fear you’d felt with a silent numbess.

It was as if a sixth sense had opened something up inside of your heart – subconsciously, you knew what was going to happen the next second, so your mind and body had to prepare in advance: you couldn’t possibly start to hyperventilate when Jackson finally called. And, as soon as you grasped the glass of water in your shaky hands, trying to keep yourself hydrated despite the pointlessness of the task, your phone finally rang.

You lunged for it, drops of water spilling on the kitchen island – empty now that Jaebum wasn’t here to eat meals with you – and nearly landing on your phone, too. You could barely keep yourself together when you saw Jackson’s name on the screen.

“Yes?” you picked up, the one word coming from the back of your throat and thus making you sound like you just woke up even though it was way past into the afternoon now.

“Hey. Sorry it took me so long to call you back,” Jackson started and you couldn’t help but notice the voices in the back of his call. You wondered if Jaebum was there with him. “I—I’ve found a way for you to talk to him.”

Your entire chest seemed to expand to provide more space for your wild heart as it continuously banged against every single rib in your ribcage.

“You did?” you asked, the words coming out in a huff.

“Yeah. There’s, uh, this party his label is hosting this Friday,” Jackson said, quieter now as if he was trusting you with a big secret. “We’ve both been invited and, even though he said he’s not going, I’ll drag him there myself. One of the producers owns this club downtown, so we’re getting a private lounge, and, you know, it seems like a good spot as any for a serious conversation. Away from the maddening crowd, so to speak.”

“Yes, yes, that sounds perfect,” you were nodding frantically. “Are you sure you can get him to come, though? Jaebum isn’t really someone that gives in to persuasion easily.”

“That’s true but alcohol makes this much easier for me,” Jackson replied. “He won’t miss a chance to get drunk. Especially amidst all that’s happening, you know?”

“Yeah. Right.”

“So, anyway,” he added quickly after catching the discouraged tone in your voice. “I’ll send you the address and let the security know you’re my plus-one.”

“Okay,” you inhaled deeply, “thank you so much. I-I—you have no idea how much I appreciate this.”

Shuffling was heard on the other end – from the sound of it, you assumed Jackson was avoiding a group of people that just walked past him – before he replied, “it’s alright. You can pay me back by getting back together. There might be a million-dollar song on the line here, yeah? He can’t write it if he’s not with you.”

“I—”

“I’ll see you Friday,” Jackson said. He must have known you could never find what to say whenever the topic of Jaebum writing a song about you was brought up. “Don’t overthink this, okay? Jaebum might not show it, but I have no doubt that he’s dying to talk to you, too.”

Friday turned out to be an eventful day. For one, it was your official last day at the gallery – handing in the employee badge that you’ve worn around your neck for the past few years was rather bittersweet: relieving, on the one hand, but also rather glum – but it was also the night of Jaebum’s party. It truly felt like today was going to be the last day of your old life – one last hoorah before you started a new era – and you even debated getting a haircut, to really imprint the change that was coming.

As it turned out, you didn’t have any time for a haircut. You barely had enough time to decide on an outfit before, packing up your phone, wallet, keys, panic, and anxiety, you walked out of the door of your empty apartment and headed downstairs to catch a cab.

The ride to the club wasn’t very long, so you didn’t have enough time to rehearse the words you planned to tell Jaebum one more time, but that didn’t really worry you much. You had a feeling your entire thought process was going to end up in shambles as soon as you saw him, anyway.

Once the cab stopped and you stepped into a busy street, it took you a good minute to find Jackson – if he wasn’t waving his hand like a madman, you’d have probably missed him – and then another minute to actually reach him as the people, crowding outside of the club, were very intent on pulling you to the back of the line.

“Hi, sorry there’s such a commotion here,” Jackson said once you finally made it to the door. “I’ve told them it wouldn’t be smart to throw a private party at a club that already goes over capacity every Friday night as it is but no one ever listens to me. Should we go in?”

You nodded, too out of breath to actually respond, and followed him inside. The security guard merely glanced at you before nodding and allowing you two to enter – Jackson, clearly, was a familiar face – and, before you could even prepare yourself properly, you were suddenly listening to the same loud, organ-clenching EDM song that Jaebum was probably listening to.

“Alright,” Jackson stated—and then repeated himself louder when you squinted your eyes as if that could help you hear him better. “Jaebum is upstairs. He got here first and I told him to wait for me in the lounge.”

“Okay—”

You had already turned towards the staircase at the back of the club but Jackson grabbed your hand. “Ah, hold on—you need a drink before you go see him. Let’s take a quick detour to the bar, yeah?”

You had to admit, that wasn’t such a bad idea, so you allowed him to pull you towards the bar where a few girls were already dancing on the bartop lit up by dozens of neon-LED lights. The atmosphere in the club was buzzing with life and it was so electrifying, you were surprised to find yourself loosening up even before you had your first drink.

Jackson took the liberty of ordering while you were too busy watching the captivating dance moves of one of the bartop girls – for someone who seemed as drunk as she was, her movements were surprisingly smooth and, honestly, rather captivating.

“I’m sorry if that’s out of line for me to say,” Jackson spoke, distracting your attention, “but you look different. How have you been doing?”

“Oh. I’m—well, I’ve been trying to move on from the things that made my life miserable,” you said but weren’t sure how much he heard because, just as you started to speak, the DJ changed the song, and the gaggle of young-adults next to you proceeded to screech at the top of their lungs. “Uh, unfortunately, I can’t move on from my own self, so I’ve been trying to make a change in my life instead. I-I guess that might be why I look different.”

“That’s good!” Jackson nodded enthusiastically, not hearing all that you’ve said but definitely catching the most important parts. “I didn’t say it was a bad different. What have you changed so far?”

“I’ve, uh—” once again, you got interrupted by the bartender bringing you and Jackson the drinks he’d ordered, “I’ve quit my job.”

Jackson’s enthusiastic smile suddenly faltered, “oh, shit. You did? What are you doing now?”

“Nothing, really. Searching for a new one,” you replied with a small shrug. “Something behind the stage, preferably. I’ve had enough customer service experience to last me a lifetime.”

He chuckled at this, picking up his drink and encouraging you to do the same. Somehow, you’ve never tried rum before but, after just a sip of the Cuba Libre in your hand, you couldn’t really tell why. It tasted far more like coke than rum and yet you could still feel the buzzing effects of the alcohol as it entered your bloodstream.

“Yeah, I suppose galleries don’t get the best specimen when it comes to clients,” Jackson said once he emptied his glass. “What about your exhibition?”

“Oh,” you took a final sip and put the empty glass down – carefully, so the girl dancing on the bartop nearby wouldn’t accidentally kick it over, “that’s not happening. I’ve said some pretty fancy words to Jiho the last time I saw him, so it’s over. I’m not really hosting one anymore.”

Jackson noted that you didn’t look overly upset about that – in fact, he was sure he saw you smile when you mentioned the last conversation with Jiho you’ve had – but he’s been around enough artists to know how deep the wounds inflicted by a crushed dream could be.

“Well, why don’t you come to me?” he offered.

You frowned, unsure what he meant. “What?”

“To work, I mean,” he explained. “You already know how big my family is on art. We’ve been investing in artists that aren’t just musicians. Actually, my very first job was modeling, did I ever tell you that? My parents hosted this whole photoshoot for me when I was, probably, two months old? The photographer said I was a star.”

You laughed. “Oh, wow, over twenty years in the modeling industry and you’re not even thirty. That’s impressive.”

“I know, right?” he played along, smirking. “But, anyway—why don’t you think about it? Not modeling, I mean. Photography. My family—they’re nice people. We look out for each other and it’s always art that comes first for us.”

It felt like a rather witty—and subtle, no doubt—way to chastise you for choosing to work with someone who thought of publicity before thinking of the art, and you felt your face heat up as you looked away from him.

“T-that’s good,” you commented awkwardly, not having expected to get scolded—yet again—on your decisions by someone who wasn’t Jaebum. You’d prepared yourself for his opinion only. “That’s a great attitude.”

“It is. I think so, too,” Jackson said, not noticing—or, choosing not to notice—your embarrassed state. “And you’re a talented artist. I understand that your mind is probably elsewhere right now—”

“Yeah,” you stretched nervously, “sort of.”

“—but do know that your dream isn’t entirely hopeless, okay?” he finished. “If you want something enough, there will always be a way to make it happen. I’m here for you.”

You’ve heard these words before but they seemed to have a different meaning tonight. Perhaps because you finally realized what the thing you wanted more than anything was.

“Thank you, Jackson,” you said, the thoughts of Jaebum being nearby doing the work that the rum and coke didn’t. You felt positively intoxicated already. “Seriously, I—I can’t thank you enough.”

“Don’t mention it,” Jackson waved his hand and then helped you stand from the bar stool as soon as he realized your mind could only be distracted from Jaebum for so long. “Now go. Talk to him.”

You exhaled shakily, closing your eyes for a few moments to mentally prepare yourself. “Right. I’m going.”

“Everything will be okay,” Jackson reminded you, “as long as you focus on what’s really important.”

You nodded one last time and then allowed his warm smile to push you towards the stairs, leading up to the VIP lounge where Jaebum thought he was waiting for Jackson.

With each step that you took, coming closer and closer to seeing him, you kept thinking about what so many people have said to you the past few weeks – if you wanted something enough, you could find a way to make it happen. They’ve all been talking about your ambitions in life – the exhibitions and the career as a photographer – but, the truth was, those were the things you’d have liked to have but they weren’t exactly the things that you wanted.

What you wanted the most in life – with ten more steps separating you from Jaebum – was to have a purpose. To have it and not to lose it. And you knew what the purpose of life was because you had it found it way before you met Jiho or even started to think about hosting any exhibitions.

Love.

As corny and cliché as it was, that was it. Everyone knew it but they liked to pretend that they didn’t. They searched for something else – money, work, children – but, at the end of the day, it always came down to love. The strongest emotion a living creature was able to feel, so much stronger and all-consuming than any shape or form of anger or hatred.

Knocking on the door and waiting, you were able to understand that love might have started wars but love ended them, too. Love was the beginning and love was the end. And – as you watched Jaebum’s red eyes appear behind the black door of the private lounge room – you knew you didn’t want your love to end. You knew you couldn’t lose your purpose in life.

“Jaebum,” you exhaled, the loud music from the club downstairs almost drowning out your voice. He stopped short at the sight of you. You couldn’t see it but, inside of his chest, a heart that seemed to freeze when he left your shared apartment, was slowly beginning to beat again. “Can we talk?”

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ratisnotcrying · 4 years ago

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first words

Summary: should i give a fuck who you are?

Pairing: pre slash sebastian moran & jim moriarty

Warnings: mild violence but otherwise just a soulmate au

Word count: 2.5K

A/N: this is crossposted on AO3

~~~

In a neat, cursive script, running smoothly around Sebastian's left wrist were the words 'Do you know who I am, Tiger?'

He can't remember the first time he was told what it said, or even who told him, though he suspects it was his mother. She had always loved the idea of soulmates and destiny; Sebastian had never understood how she could feel like that when she had been 'destined' to marry his father - her mark read 'who the fuck do you think you are?' The earliest memory he has of his own mark is from when he was seven, two days after his mother died and his father drank so much he still reeked the next morning. He had grabbed Sebastian's tiny arm, leaving thin red marks sitting over small purple bruises, and just stared at the words - obviously they had reminded him of something because, thirty minutes later, Sebastian was left to drag himself to bed and unable to move without feeling a soul-deep pain radiating from each and evey place his father had struck him. From that day on, he covered his mark with plasters, long sleeves and ratty brown leather bracelets.

As he grew up he decided that he really didn't want to think about what kind of situation would warrant someone asking if he 'knew who he was' but then he started to think that his habit of getting into fights is what would be the exact reason for someone saying that. He had honestly been a well behaved child, and then a snotty prick by the name of Cyril - fucking Cyril - had made a snide comment about his mum and it all sort of went tits up from there on out. Four years and three schools later, he got kicked out of school altogether. And kicked out of his house because he got kicked out of school, and because his dad was a bastard. He didn't cover his mark anymore, not overly bothered by who saw it.

Living on the streets turned out to be a lot harder than sixteen year old Sebastian had expeted so he decided that building a reputation for himself was the best way to survive, and he was still a kid so at the time beating the shit out of people seemed like a good idea. Until he got arrested for assult. He's not sure what happened but somehow he ended up leaving the police station the next morning with no charges against him and a not-quite 'discussion' about the pros of him joining the military.

"Listen, mate, I get you've had it rough but I have to make sure that you get fighting isn't the answer. You got lucky this time but next time you won't. You need to take control of your life and make something of it ,yeah? I got you this leaflet and I want you to read it, alright?" The officer was barely older than him and the idea of actually accepting life advice from him was laughable so he just grunted as he walked out.

Four years later, at aged twenty-one, he was one of the most skilled snipers Her Majesty's Armed Forces had ever seen, and one of the luckiest too. It was sort of a running joke in his unit that he could get away with anything because good god did that man know how to push his luck. His superior officers had never met anyone who could talk back like Sebastian could and they had definitely never met anyone who could go from nought to a hundred with his fists so quickly, either. But, if being an asshole and getting away with it wasn't proof enough of his luck, the story behind Sebastian's soon to be nickname is a true testament to it.

It was mid-afternoon, the sun was hammering down and Sebastian was just trying to do some exercise when he heard a quiet noise above the hum of the heat and when he looked around, he saw a tiger making it's way cautiously into the encampment. It's stripes seemed distorted as they hung off of it - it was too skinny, he didn't need to be a genius to know that, but it was still a big fucking animal that was slowly approaching the sleeping form of Benny. If asked, Sebastian would tell you he had no idea why he did what he did next, because he truly does not know what possessed him. Picking up a hefty rock from beside him, he hurled it towards the tiger and, obviously, the tiger turned to him, moving faster now, gathering speed as it pounced.

When he opened his eyes he saw the tiger, limp-running away and Benny coming to drag him to his feet - all the others who had gathered around him still seemed shocked by the fact he had fought off an actual tiger. He didn't stay standing for long though and slumped back to the floor, wiping blood repeatedly out of his left eye and spitting some into the dirt next to him. He went to wipe his face more but a firm hand gripped his wrist, pulling it away before tugging at the open wounds on his face.

"You're lucky - it just missed your eye but you're going to need a lot of stitches. You will have some nasty scars, too," he said, guiding Sebastian over to the medical tent and getting to work.

Over the next few weeks he started to find his nickname very fucking annoying, particularly when his mates chorused 'tigers don't care about the opinions of sheep' every time one of their superior officers gave him a talking to and singing Eye of the Tiger at every opportunity. And the worst part was that he couldn't even get away because he wasn't allowed to do shit. So, really, if you took into account all of this, it was only logical that he would end up breaking his lieutenant's nose and find himself back on the streets with nothing to his name except a dishonourable discharge and three scars running from his left temple to the right side of his jaw.

---

'Should I give a fuck who you are?'

Jim had always worn his soulmark like a badge. No one ever told him what it said, for obvious reasons but he was a clever child, he could read and articulate way beyond his years so when seven year old Jim walked into the dinning room, looked his mother in the eye and stuttered out, 'should I give a f-fuck who you are?' before grinning at her, no one should have been surprised. That had been an interesting and pointless conversation because despite his mother telling him, 'Good boys shouldn't use such bad words,' he still continued to say this well into his early teens.

He was thirteen when he pulled off his first heist. It was in a corner shop, he lead a team of four and they got away with a new box of ready salted pringles, a case of red bull and, of course, a box of own brand chocolate bars because they're way better than the expensive shit. They so very nearly got caught, a brawl in the pub opposite bringing two police cars screeching to a halt in the road, but they somehow managed to slip away and made a fairly good profit on their goods. His second one was a year later and went a lot better. Him and four others again, this time a small shop in the high street from which they successfully took two cases of cigarettes to sell; two boxes of lighters because he was a good businessman and knew how to make a good sale; three cases of wine carefully stacked in a shopping trolley, and a nice new set of knives for himself.

By sixteen he has heard the phrase 'should I give a fuck who you are?' several times - not surprising when you looked at his life. He had the beginnings of a small network, maybe twenty or so people in place around his neighbourhood and it was slowly growing. Whilst those on the outskirts of his web mainly just roughed people up a little or pulled off the robberies that Jim no longer did himself, those higher up dealt with anyone who tried to take over Jim's patch. They would find themselves face down on the concrete, a muddy black boot on their neck until Jim sauntered over and crouched down, saying in a teasing voice, 'do you know who I am?' He started giggling childishly every time they responded with the words inked on his wrist.

Two days after he turned seventeen, his second in command got arrested for being a stupid prick who deserves everything coming to him - who would leave a gun in the front seat of their stolen astra? And who would steal a fucking astra? He almost grassed but somehow the evidence against him got lost so he walked - Jim has no idea how that happened, and when his second was found bloodied and bruised in an alleyway, well, it certainly couldn't be traced back to Jim.

The first time he killed a man was a week after his mother had died - or been murdered during a break in, to be specific. It had been a rough week to say the least. The police had been poking around, working off a tip some fuckwit had decided to bestow upon them. He's sure that if he spoke to the many councillors he was directed to they would say something about having time to grieve or process or 'work through it'. But he didn't speak to them because he had his own way of 'working through it', which was good for Jim, but wasn't quite as good for the imbecile who had not only come into his town, but had hurt his mother. He got a call late on the Thursday.

"We've got 'im, boss." "I'll be five minutes. If he has so much one broken bone, I will make you regret it." "Yes, boss."

When he arrived, two of his men were standing a little too rigidly whilst the third was stood with a foot on the neck of a crying prick.

"Hmm, a broken finger. Too bad. I apologise..." he trailed off, crouching down and looking expectantly into teary eyes.

"David," he choked out.

"David. Do you know who I am, David?" The look of horror, the colour visibly draining from his face and the way he physically gagged caused Jim to laugh sardonically before he continued.

"You might know my mother too - you were acquainted just a few days ago. Do you remember that, David?" he hissed as he used one gloved hand to pull a knife from his inside pocket.

He managed to avoid getting blood on most of his clothes, only a few drops landed on his coat but he would still have to burn it. He threw the knife on the floor and tossed his coat to the man closest to him, the gloves shoved in the pocket.

"Burn this. Do not touch that knife - it's going to get the cretin who snitched arrested. The only reason I'm letting you off today is because you're not worth the trouble it'll take to scrape you off the pavement."

In the following years his business expanded to include blackmail, kidnapping and assassinations. The only problem was there the unfortunately small pool of assassins to choose from - something about not wanting to kill innocent people or kill for money or other equally boring excuses.

And that's when he discovered recently discharged - sorry, dishonoably discarged Sebastian Moran.

---

Sebastian was not having a good week. It was nothing specific, really, it was just that being homeless is fucking shit and all of his stuff was set on fire; now all he wanted was to treat himself to a new pack of fags and maybe a drink. The route was familiar, the shadows, the dripping of the drains, so the two, quiet sets of footsteps he heard on his way back sounded loud and clear as an alert he was being followed, which was not doing anything to elevate his mood. He stopped walking and rolled his shoulders.

"What do you want?"

He spun around, arms raised in defence when he heard them run forwards, blocking the initial attack before launching himself forwards. He managed to knock one bloke on his arse just as he heard two, maybe three more approaching from behind. So, yeah, over all it hadn't been a great week but seeing all five of his attackers unconscious on the ground made it a little better. That was until he heard a sixth person approach, clapping slowly. Sebastian growled and pivoted, grabbing the condescending fuck by his collar and slamming him up against the damp brick work.

"Do you know who I am, Tiger?" the man said, eyeing the scars on his face and the bodies on the floor, and Sebastian very nearly punched him in the jaw because he sounded like he needed it and no one had ever obliged. Sebastian's eyes scanned the body in front of him, taking in his short, almost wiry frame, his vey expensive looking suit, and his shit eating grin. Sebastian put a cigarette between his lips, ignoring the sting of his split lip, and blew the smoke into his face.

"Should I give a fuck who you are?" he said through another exhale.

"The names Moriarty, and you should really show me more respect. You can start by letting go of me." The man - Moriarty - looked pointedly at where Sebastian still had his arm firmly pressed to his chest and Sebastian shrugged, letting go and taking half a step back.

"Much appreciated, I do hate wrinkling my suits. You'd do well to remember that, when you work for me."

"When I work for you?" Sebastian laughed incredulously.

"Naturally. I know all about you, Sebastian Moran. You have a skill set that I can use and, in return, I can offer you the opportunity to not be homeless." Moriarty slid his hands into his pockets and rocked on his heels, which seemed to be his equivalent of twiddling his thumbs in boredom.

Sebastian flicked his fag butt away. "Suppose I don't want this job, what then?"

"Seeing as you do want this job I think it best not to waste my time. You'll soon learn that I'm not a very patient man." He turned on his heel, walking back the way he came, only pausing briefly to call out, "Come along now, Tiger. Work to do."

#sebastian moran #jim moriarty #bbc sherlock #soul mates #first meeting

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gwoongi · 6 years ago

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𝗄𝗈𝗈𝗉𝗂𝖽 ♥︎ jeongguk (ft namjoon)

𝗄𝗈𝗈𝗉𝗂𝖽 jeon jeongguk / reader (ft kim namjoon) genre: pornstar au, smut rating: explicit words: 4749

The sight of his shit-eating grin leaves Namjoon with a prickle of hot frustration that hurts when the video rolls to an end, with no flashy end credits or promotion. Just a black screen with his own idiot reflection staring back at him.

a/n: i……………i don’t know what came over me.

warnings: graphic sexual content, rough sex, porn themes, choking, impreg kink, creampie, squirting, daddy kink, loving sex, dirty talking, degradation/humiliation, unprotected sex, cum eating, porn couple, name-calling (slut shaming?), bisexual namjoon, dirty talk literally inspired by dirty talk i see in sexy stuff im sorry

Namjoon liked porn. Like virtually every guy in his fraternity, Namjoon watched porn almost daily. There was something addictive, like a drug, about visiting PornHub; porn was like an old friend he hadn’t seen in a while, and watching porn was like relieving an itch that he couldn’t quite reach.

“The fact that all you do when you get home is watch porn is just sad,” his friend Sunmi had said, with her cheek pushed up against the worn bicep of Namjoon’s one of many frat brothers, Hoseok. Namjoon had just scowled and said nothing, not feeling the need to defend his unrequited friendship with porn because, “everybody watches porn”. To him, it was kind of like gaming; everybody played games, some more than others. And Namjoon enjoyed exploring every category, watching searches with pretty thumbnails of peach genitals or cum-stuffed faces, holes leaking with it.

It was a Friday evening, the end of Namjoon’s long haul of work from a week of University. With an untouched linguistics assignment flashing to be given attention in his emails, Namjoon closed the tab and sighed loudly with a frown, rubbing the side of his face with his hand. Boredom was the bane of his life, and he could feel it slowly creeping up on him, wrapping like a snake to prey around his body and very slowly squeezing the life out of him. After a few moments of exhausting hesitation, Namjoon groaned and reluctantly reached for his laptop.

“When you’re bored, try and reach out to a friend,” was something his Mother had always said. Granted, she didn’t quite mean friend as a synonym for PornHub dot com, but at the end of the day, she never specified what a friend was or who the friend could be. And, look, Google filled in the blanks for him as he typed in ‘p’, and like a loyal good best friend, Pornhub logged him in automatically, his premium membership like a badge of honour.

Namjoon glanced at the time- ten fourty three in the evening, and the exhaustion from classes and his late afternoon shift at the Italian restaurant down the street still hung over him, despite the glorious view of cum-filled cunts and leaking dicks. Because, when dabbling with porn, Namjoon wasn’t picky. Life could throw a thousand warm wet vaginas in Namjoon’s face, or a thousand veiny cocks, and he’d still find himself with his hands stuffed down the front of his pants, begging for some kind of release. Sunmi’s old words echoed in his head- it was sad. What he was doing, and how often he did it, was actually the saddest thing in the world.

Unlike normal, Namjoon hovered his cursor over the categories, undecided on where to go to. He’d viewed every category to death, spending hours jerking to images of girls on all fours, dressed like cats, gags stuffed in their mouths; boys with big dicks up their asses, tears down their faces. You name it, and Namjoon has probably seen it, bought the t-shirt, left a rating. As he scrolls, Namjoon’s cursor lands on a category he admits is rather alien: Verified Couples.

Not that Namjoon is at all against love- in actual fact, he thinks that is what he yearns for most of all. Somebody he can take care of, and look after, and wake up in the morning next to and stroke hair from their face, all whilst simultaneously being able to shove their faces into the mattress and fuck them, and be fucked. He’s just never explored the Verified Couples section, because honestly, he thinks he might get a little jealous of either either party in the video. What if the girl is the hottest woman he’s ever seen before, and she’s being dominated by a guy Namjoon knows from three seconds isn’t good for her? And what if the sexiest man alive is wasting his time with a selfish girl who only cares about herself?

Regardless, Namjoon decides that today, this Friday of April, he is going to explore this category like Lara Croft in a new tomb.

He clicks, unbothered, and scrolls for a few seconds. Nothing is catching his eye; none of these thumbnails show him anything he’s never seen before, and they’re all painfully mediocre and white, some just plain weird with titles like “Abusing my husband with feet!”, which is certainly not going to make him feel good tonight. After a minute or two of bored searching, Namjoon almost realises why he never dapples into this section of porn when he pauses, mildly interested in a thumbnail and a title reading, “Rough sex with my girlfriend.”

The sight of the thumbnail takes his breath away; a man, with unbelievably toned thighs and a gorgeous curved ass holds his girlfriend like she is the last thing alive on the planet, his arms wrapped around her body, the skin bunching up like old Greek statues you’d find in galleries. She is made of marble and the guy is the sculptor, breathing life into her skin as he, from the thumbnail, holds her side with his left and her small tit with his right. The thumbnail moves as he hovers the cursor over it, and for a short few seconds, Namjoon watches the boy’s hand move from her tit to her throat, and the muscles in his hand suggest he is holding tightly, his hips meeting hers in a sweet kiss as she matches his thrusts.

Namjoon can already feel the discomfort tenting in his joggers and he clicks the video without a minute of hesitation.

It begins like most pornos, the sight of the boyfriend’s enlarged cock at the bottom of the frame, the delightful view of a V-line and honey abs filling the screen for a moment as the boyfriend fiddles with the camera of amazing quality. In the background, Namjoon sees the girlfriend, her body dressed in pointless coral lingerie, the sight of perked nipples soaking through and faded bites on her collarbones. Before enlarging the video, Namjoon checks the uploader: koopid. The bio reading, Fucking Y/N until she cries for me to cum inside her, signed by Jeongguk. Now he’s familiar with names, and it feels as though he’s watching in through the window, hiding behind curtains as Jeongguk fucks the living shit out of his unbelievably cute girlfriend Y/N.

“Mmm, you look so pretty, baby girl.”

Namjoon notes how sweet the unknown Jeongguk sounds, almost as if his voice had been dunked in honey, and his words were the glump of thick substance dripping down. He sucks in a breath when Jeongguk comes into view, naked for the world to see, a smile on his face Namjoon believes was made for him. He’s boyish enough for Namjoon to enjoy, and he leans back, allowing the couple to do what they intend to do.

“So fucking pretty,” Jeongguk comments between his teeth, his fingers looping around your underwear. “Who bought you this?”

“You did,” you reply, shimmying to aid Jeongguk as he slowly pulls your panties down the length of your thighs, smooth and newly shaved. Namjoon can see a shine. Marble. “Do you like it?”

“Mm, that’s right. I love it, baby,” Jeongguk says, lifting you with ease up and out of the panties, already relatively soaked from whatever foreplay he did beforehand to get you hot and flustered. “Are you gonna let me fuck you tonight, for everybody to see?”

A gasp leaves your lips. “Yes.”

“Yes, what?” he murmurs in reply.

“Yes, Daddy.”

“Mm, good girl. You’re so good,” Jeongguk praises, kissing beneath your chin and encircling your arms around you. You grab onto his biceps for balance as he smooches the skin, with one swift movement setting you down on your back onto the plush pastels of the bedsheets, a whitewashed blue with pretty tiled patterns on the pillows. You lie there, staring at Jeongguk as he shadows over you, a hand on either side of your body. The muscles in his back flinch as he moves downwards in a curve, kissing a messy line from your chin to your sternum, leaving behind a visibly wet trail Namjoon follows with his eyes. “You’re so good for Daddy, aren’t you?”

“Yes, only for you, Daddy,” you squeak out, like a little kitten, a strangled and high-pitched moan leaving your lips as Jeongguk licks a line between your breasts, one hand palming a tit in circles, his thumb rubbing your nipple beneath the lace of the bralette. “Only for you.”

“I know,” Jeongguk acknowledges, rising up when he realises he’s prolonging things. “Keep being good for me, okay, baby?”

You mewl with a nod as he continues, getting off from his words, a vocal God, “you gonna let Daddy have your sweet little pussy, hm? Let me fill you up with my cock, fill your pussy with Daddy’s cum?”

“Please,” you breathe out, arching your back up as Jeongguk removes the bra with one hand, taunting his experience to the audience and helping you slip out of it, your perked breasts sloping upwards like tiny mountains, a delicious treat for Daddy. He contains a groan. Tonight, he wants to be mean. Tonight, Jeongguk wants to have you all, every inch of you, he wants to shove his cock so far inside of you that it hurts. For the first time on his channel, Jeongguk wants to be rough. He wants to put on a show, show everybody who you belong to. “Please. I want it- I want you to fuck me.”

Jeongguk palmed your breasts for a while longer, deciding what he was going to do with you. After a very short briefing in his head, Jeongguk hummed to himself as if thoughtfully pleased and moved between your legs, satisfied and proud when you spread them open for him. He let out a hiss between his teeth, looking at the wetness pooling between your legs.

“My, my,” Jeongguk comments. “All this for me?”

“All for you,” you confirm. He is so close, his touch burning, and you rise off the mattress impatiently, whining loudly. “Please, Daddy. I need you.”

Jeongguk makes a noise with his mouth, as if disappointed. He isn’t, but he knows how to push your buttons. He knows what to do and when to do it to get a reaction. “I don’t think you deserve my cock just yet. Daddy needs to hear what you want him to do to your precious little pussy. Hm? Tell me, tell me what you want me to do, baby.”

Namjoon thumbs his head, rubbing pre-cum like it was a new lotion. His cock was throbbing, pulsing as if breathing on its own.

“Please,” you begin, your voice enough for Namjoon to wrap his fingers around his cock in anticipation, “I need your cock inside of me. I want you to fuck me, until I can’t walk. Please, please, you own me. You own my pussy. Ugh- I need-to feel you inside of me.”

Jeongguk almost has the nerve to look unsatisfied, but he reckons, and only because he knows the ratings depend on it, that he’s prolonged it enough. He knows what everyone’s here for. Even though he does, nobody else cares about what you have to say. He pretends to think about it, humming once more before smiling, dragging you down the mattress by your thighs so your wet cunt is closer to his dick. You writhe with anticipation as Jeongguk massages his cock for a few moments, sucking in a breath and then positioning the tip near your entrance. He’s going in raw today.

Underneath him, you moan as it teasingly prods at your entrance, throbbing for his length. From where he kneels between your opened legs, Jeongguk stares at your hair dancing around your head like a halo, the blush burning on your cheeks. With his mouth open with admiration, his heart widening out of pure love, Jeongguk remembers what he’s doing and without warning, shoves his cock inside, without giving you the chance to grow accustomed to his hardened length.

He’s big- Namjoon, behind the screen, can see that.

Beneath his body, and heavily breathing torso, you cry out with pleasure, a large and loud moan ripping out into the silence of your bedroom. It sounds like Heaven to everybody’s ears, Jeongguk responding with a grunt of pride, knowing only he can make you feel this good. He pulls out and thrusts back in roughly, without caring for how it hurts. From the angle of the camera, Namjoon gets a good view of Jeongguk’s dick pushing in and out of your hole, that tiny hole Namjoon thought nothing could ever get inside. He watches with wonder, his expression like a child in a sweets shop, as Jeongguk pulls you closer to him, pushing deeper inside.

“Feel good?” Jeongguk asks through laboured breaths.

“Yes!” you squeeze out, tightening around him. “Oh, yes!”

“Mm, you like Daddy’s cock?”

“I love your cock,” you rush out. “I love Daddy’s cock so much.”

“Hmm,” Jeongguk replies happily, the praise making his chest inflate with adoration and confidence. “I love how you take my cock, baby. Your pussy is so pretty with my cock inside.”

You fall silently shortly after that, save the erotic groans and moans and the distinct clapping of skin, like an applause for all your hard work. Namjoon pumps his own dick desperately, his eyes flitting from your face to your tits, the right cupped by Jeongguk’s large hand and the other bouncing gorgeously in the light, to the way Jeongguk’s ass clenches as he finds a new spot to abuse inside of you, a new spot to send you yelling out with pleasure; Namjoon shakily breaths out a moan as he stares at your gaping cunt, wet and glistening like a 90’s edit from Tumblr, Jeongguk’s dick moving in and out with wet sounds.

Jeongguk changes the pace, quickening his thrusts as if it doesn’t even matter. He gets drunk off the reaction, grinning with a soft chuckle as you cling to his skin like letting go will kill you, each thrust met with a yelp that increases in pitch and volume. Namjoon knows how this looks and sounds, but he doesn’t care anyway. His laptop is on its side as Namjoon frantically pulls his joggers down to pool around his ankles, his red and angry cock snuggling into his hand as he watches the pair of you, entangled together, lovers, in a sort of love Namjoon can’t even wet dream of having. He looks at the screen through a blurry gaze and sees you writhing with pleasure, tears slowly pulling down your flamed cheeks.

“O-oh, right there!” you mewl, your hands clenching around the skin on Jeongguk’s thighs. “Oh my God, Jeongguk, right there.”

He visibly falters, as if the screen glitched, and the hand wrapped around your tit moves up to your throat. The thumbnail- Namjoon groans out loud at the thought, remembering how it went. Jeongguk wraps his hand around your throat, his thumb where it needs to be, his eyes glued to your face observing your reaction. He wants to test how far you can go. He wants to make you cry, and hurt. He wants you to feel humiliated, embarrassed by how you beg for him to keep going deeper, faster, rougher. Jeongguk feels like a church-boy discovering sex for the first time, testing the waters on how many sins he can break before his Priest father comes into the room.

“Who said you could call me that?” Jeongguk sneers, his hand tightening slightly. You moan around the struggle, your eyes lidded and heavy with the euphoric weight of sex. “Hm?” Jeongguk’s hips stutter faster, rougher, sharply hitting a spot that sends you in a squealing mess.

“I-I’m sorry, Daddy,” you gasp. “‘m sorry. I won’t do it again. I’ll be good.”

“You’ve disappointed me,” Jeongguk admits. Then, quite suddenly, he stops moving, the absence of his pace sending you writhing with anxiousness. The threatening orgasm begs to spill over, like a nearly full glass that needs a few more drops before overflowing from the top. “You gonna make it up to me, little one?”

You nod against the sheets. “Yes, Daddy. I promise I’ll be good.”

“Okay, baby girl,” he agrees, He sits back on his heels and Namjoon watches with agonising anticipation as Jeongguk sits between his own legs, his feet behind him, pulling you from the mattress onto his lap where your own legs wrap around his tiny waist. “Fuck yourself on Daddy’s cock.”

Like a good girl, you don’t need to be told twice. Namjoon finds out from the way you look at your boyfriend between barely open eyes that you’re a total cockslut; you wrap your arms around Jeongguk loosely as you sit back down on his cock, like it’s your throne and you own it. It takes a moment for you to readjust to his size, sucking in a breath and rising up and down on it, doing all the work as Jeongguk watches with his tongue between his teeth, his arms up with palms flat on your back.

“Hmm, show everybody how good my cock makes you feel,” he instructs, moving his mouth to your nipple and giving it a light suck. It’s as if he’s taking a toothless bite out of a whip of ice cream, getting a taste before going in for the whole thing. He looks up at you between his thick eyelashes, “go on. Show them who’s making you feel good.” With one hand, Jeongguk kindly wipes away the tears from your face. “Don’t even think about cumming. You haven’t earned it.”

Namjoon can feel his body deepening with a hot flush as he watches- perhaps not entirely with want but with need, a need to be loved and fucked and held the way you are. He never realised how much he needed koopid in his life until he stumbled across it, and his heart panics with an unfamiliar lust when you rock your head back and look shyly at the camera.

Namjoon can see now that your face is hot, sweaty slightly and tear-stained, your lips swollen from whatever foreplay Jeongguk failed to include in the video. He doesn’t care- he’s torn between looking at your eyes and your tits, bouncing around Jeongguk’s lips, or your ass, moving with each deep sit you take on Jeongguk’s dick, his length buried in your warm cunt. He wants to see more; he wants to see your pussy stuffed with dick, he wants to see the cum pour out of you slowly like cake mixture. With his hand moving quickly up and down his own length, Namjoon can feel the nerves twisting inside of him, like the rise in volume slowly creeping, his orgasm nearing. You lift yourself up and down on Jeongguk’s dick like you were made for it, like you were the only person worthy of sitting on it.

“Dirty little slut, being selfish with my cock,” Jeongguk words around your nipple. “Huh? Look at you, taking in all my cock like a big brave girl. Bet everyone wants to see your pretty pussy.”

Yes, Namjoon says to himself. Please. Please.

“Do you want that?” he edges. “Want everyone to see how red and stretched your hole is for me?”

You don’t reply, stubbornly, fucking yourself onto Jeongguk’s dick like its your life’s purpose. Jeongguk doesn’t want to show people. He doesn’t want them to see everything on this one video- if they want to see your pussy stretched out and pretty for them, then they can check out your other videos. Namjoon’s a porn connoisseur; he know looks, and he knows that’s what Jeongguk wants as he glances you up and down and then at the camera. He smiles smugly, and the audience suddenly know it too. He’s not going to give you what you want. It’s his turn to be selfish. Namjoon moans out loud.

“Tell me baby,” Jeongguk asks, “what you want?”

“Please-please,” you gasp out, “please c-cum inside of me. Please. Please- oh, Guk, please, baby. I’m close. Please cum in me-fill me up?”

Jeongguk kisses your breast. “Do you deserve it, princess?”

“Y-yes, I do,” you reply. “I’ve been good for Daddy. I’m Daddy’s good little girl.”

“Mmm, you are,” he agrees. He kisses your breast sweetly once more, looking up to kiss you round on the lips. Around him, you groan, sending butterfly kisses across his lips and he smiles, half forgetting what he’s doing. From his smelly bedroom, Namjoon thinks it’s sweet. He wants to cum so badly.

“Okay, honey. I’ll cum inside of you this once,” Jeongguk complies. He pulls you flush against his chest, rearranging himself inside of you and then lifting his hips to match your rhythm. “Are you gonna be good for me?” You reply with moans.

Namjoon moves his hand so fast- he pumps his dick with a quicker speed, his mouth hanging agape as you moan sweetly above Jeongguk’s forehead, and then slowly look to the side at the camera, daring the audience, staring into the lens and by extension, right into Namjoon’s eyes. He wants to fall inside the screen, and rip you out of Jeongguk’s hands. He wants to be the one inside you. He also wants to be the one around Jeongguk, feeling his big dick stretch him out. Namjoon cries out- porn was so unfair.

“Bet you’d like that, you little slut,” Jeongguk grins, “wouldn’t you? Letting Daddy fill you up with his cum. Yeah? You want me to do that, put all my sperm inside you and make a baby?”

“Mmh, Jeongguk!”

“Look at you,” he continues, laughing slightly. “Look at how you take me. Your tiny little hole.” He scoffs with affection, “You’re a mess, baby. My little baby, taking my cock so well. I’m so proud of you.”

You cling to your boyfriend, your jaw slack as you groan and stare at the camera. Namjoon can feel his stomach twisting, his hands cupping at his balls for relief, imagining that one hand is you, and the other Jeongguk. He can feel his heart in his ears and his throat; Jeongguk buries himself deeper inside of you, gripping at your marble skin to drag you down and up onto his dick, the slapping skin no match for the moans pouring from your lips, and faintly, he can make out Jeongguk’s own moans, slightly high and breathy, indicating the end is near. Namjoon doesn’t know what to focus on.

Still watching the camera, you shake your head back and move one hand to Jeongguk’s throat, clenching it to hear him groan out with pleasure and pain beneath you, your face scrunching up as you slam yourself down onto his dick. It’s rough and wet with sounds that fill Namjoon’s ears, and Jeongguk’s hand comes down like a whip to smack your ass, a boob filling his face as you arch up with each smack, girlish moans escaping free. Namjoon can taste salt in his mouth, and blood from biting down on the inside of his cheek, and he almost screams out about how unfair life is because koopid is there and he is here, when you bow your head to Jeongguk and shiver.

“I wanna cum, Jeongguk,” you beg. “Please, baby.”

Jeongguk cocks his head with sudden kindness. “Okay, baby. I’ll let you cum. Cum for me, cum around my dick.”

Threefold sounds fill the remaining seconds; you cry out with relief and pleasure as you spill cum around Jeongguk’s dick, the white substance trickling down the running vein that pulses and Jeongguk stuffs his face in your neck, and Namjoon back home yells out with abused satisfaction, closing his eyes as his own relief spills out on his stomach and bedsheets, his fingers soaked with his own cum. He breathes in the fantasy of seeing his own cum pouring out of you, the way Jeongguk does once you’ve fucked yourself tired on top of him, and he lifts you up by your thighs to marvel as the sliding semen down your legs, clumped in your hole, dripping like a tap. Jeongguk’s dick vibrates between his legs and twitches at the sight. He doesn’t show the audience. They don’t deserve to see you. They don’t deserve to see what he’s done to you.

Jeongguk doesn’t even say goodbye; he lets the audience and his girlfriend catch their breath before he smiles down at you, adoringly, praises your hard work and shuffles himself towards the camera, where the sight of his shit-eating grin leaves Namjoon with a prickle of hot frustration that hurts when the video rolls to an end, with no flashy end credits or promotion. Just a black screen with his own idiot reflection staring back at him.

Namjoon needs more. His dick hurts and his head throbs, but he needs more- he physically needs to see more. His hands tremble as he clicks on koopid’s profile, observing the fifteen videos you have public. He doesn’t need to watch them all tonight, saving them for his lonely evenings, but he does click on “creampie in my girlfriends cute pussy”.

He knows it’s worth the overstimulation when he gets five minutes in and sees you squirt, unexpectedly, onto Jeongguk’s face and the bedsheets. Aside from the view and the surprised gasp that is ripped from your mouth, Namjoon hears Jeongguk’s throaty chuckle up close and personal, and he sees Jeongguk’s cocky smirk now that the boy has set the camera to the side, giving Namjoon a beautiful view of your cunt and the side of Jeongguk’s wet face.

He doesn’t know what to do with himself when Jeongguk manoeuvres himself back between your legs and thrusts, the sight of your cock-filled hole and the curve of Jeongguk’s toned ass filling his screen. Jeongguk cums noisily; he groans gruffly, sounding intimidating and the blood rushes to Namjoon’s cock and he cums unexpectedly, missing the grand finale of when Jeongguk pulls out after filling you up with his cum.

He grins to himself and moves the camera so everybody can see how pretty it looks; Namjoon stares, milking his own high, looking at how Jeongguk’s cum leaks out of you slowly. You’re filled with it, the dried mess staining your skin and your body rising with deep and heavy breaths. It’s pink and abused, your hole wide and clenching almost with each breath. Jeongguk’s hand comes into view, the other holding the camera shakily, and he pulls apart your lips to show the sight clearly. His fingertip curls around the substance and as you lift yourself up onto your elbows, Jeongguk switches for two fingers, lapping up the escaping cum and shoving it right in your mouth and on your tongue.

Namjoon cums again. It’s the third time he’s came this evening, and it’s the first time he’s ever added a channel to his favourites.

He’s not sure what it is about koopid that makes him feel so fucking good, but when Jeongguk heaves himself down next to you and flips the camera, showing the unfair gorgeousness of the pair of you fucked out next to each other, your hair slightly in Jeongguk’s mouth, Namjoon knows he wants more. He needs more. He doesn’t care if Sunmi calls him sad, but, Namjoon knows that there is nothing on Earth that can cure the want and need he has for koopid.

Jeongguk grins to the camera, looking at you against the sheets and Namjoon can see in his eyes the way he is so in love with you. You smile too, kissing his lips and curling up against his neck and the last thing Namjoon sees before his own dumb reflection again is Jeongguk smirking at the audience before leaving. Jeongguk knows what he has and how lucky he is. Namjoon isn’t sure how to feel when he realises that he’ll never have what you and Jeongguk have. He feels empty and pathetic with his cock out and a black screen looking at him.

He’s not sure who he’s jealous of. Jeongguk, for getting to stuff his fat cock into your hole and seeing you, hearing you, feeling you on a daily basis. Or you, for getting fucked relentlessly and lovingly by the best looking man he thinks he has ever seen. Maybe it’s both.

(It’s definitely both.)

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gg-astrology · 6 years ago

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TWICE Im Nayeon - Overview

Hello! 💕 I’m back at it again with a TWICE overview!! 💕 Today I’m trying to work on Nayeon, Jeongyeon and Dahyun!! 💕💕 By the time I’m done with Nayeon’s though-- it’s quite late ;; So I’ll probably finish Jeongyeon and Dahyun’s tomorrow!! 💕💕💕 But please-- have a Virgo cutie pie today!! 💕💕💕

Disclaimer: For unknown Birthtimes we’re going to use the standard 12.00pm --and as always, please read with your own discretion! 💕

September 22nd, 1995

Virgo Sun (3rd Decan/Taurus)

god don’t you just love a Virgo sun goddess??💕💕

Especially in the third decan -- the Virgo/Taurus Venusian beauty is such a joyful chill lovely being

Out of all the decans-- Virgo/Taurus may be the more social of the bunch, not overly social like a buzz buzz butterfly, but gracious and sociable.

People approach them because they feel comfortable to be around-- they may look after you, but they also expect you to look after yourself. With a certain Venusian quality to them-- they may be adept at taking care of others in a nurturing way as well.

Caring-- basically, but not like-- naggy about it. Atleast not necessary, there’ll be moments sometimes where it comes out because they DO care about others and can’t help but worry for them-- but generally-- they may be the chillest-- willing to let things slide, but also stubborn in some area as well.

Criticality is still there but it isn’t super prominent-- it comes out when it’s necessary, good listeners and a comforting shoulder to cry on.

The type to tuck your hair behind your ear and put an arm comfortingly around your shoulder as they sit with you while you cry. That’s the kind of Virgo/Taurus decan is for people sometimes (*depends on other things as well)

Besides this-- Virgo in the 2nd decans also tend to be quite jovial. As in-- they’re fun loving, peaceful. Exudes a certain serenity to them despite the on-going anxiety/restlessness they feel as a mutable sign.

Sometimes you can’t even tell they’re anxious about something because they give so much stability/structure to others that people are distracted away from it.

Unlike the seriousness of Virgo/Capricorn decan or the curiousity/intellect of the Virgo/Virgo decan --- Virgo/Taurus tend to focus more on the self. Self-satisfaction, self-stability. Finding happiness in the small trivial things in life (maybe a butterfly, something they’ve seen today) -- it helps with curbing some of their anxiety but also to find balance.

With the grace of Venusian decan they can often have an optimistic ‘I can do it!’ attitude. It’s a joy to be around--- because Virgos are essentially workers, they like to be productive.

This sense of positivity to their general attitude/disposition certainly helps with landing them in many roles bc others react well when they seem co-operative/enthusiastic about it!

Y know-- like it’s their disposition. Besides being a ‘solid’ person to depend on bc of how calming/straight-forward thinking they can be (looking on what to do/step-by-step for the future) the type to go ‘ok, let me see if you’re feeling ok first. Then we can work on what to do next together’

Virgo/Taurus decan combines efficiency with hard-work. They aren’t afraid to work hard or put in effort in order to get to a stable/solid ground again. They’re loyal-- first and foremost. So if you think they’re going to ditch you you thought wrong.

They’re earnestly the type to help you up a semi-difficult hike, offering you their hand so you can get on the same level and work your way up together. Trusting and dedicated-- it’s that solid/stable core beneath their positive personality that makes them so likeable to many people.

Nayeon’s Virgo Sun in the 2nd decan can also be the kind of person whom-- when confronted with a problem, takes the time to process different perspective of how to approach it.

Virgos pay attention to the details-- and in this case the details have more to do with a ‘situation’ at hand and how to tackle it. They aren’t looking at the result, or what would become after. They’re looking at the thing ‘solid’ thing they can grasps--- the problem/situation/thing that needs to be solved-- and then work on the process of resolving it in the way that they can.

Honesty and personal integrity comes with this placement--- as with many other Virgos-- those with Virgo Sun places a high expectancy to be as honest and ‘pure’ as possible. Pure-hearted in a way, they don’t want to be misunderstood or place other’s expectations too high/low unless they can take it/come through with it for them.

Disappointment-- not just from themselves but from others around them is a harsh thing to take. So they set their own margins and work on succeeding in what they can do, working on things step by step until they can achieve the ‘overall’ picture as a ‘success’.

With Mercury and Venus influencing her Sun -- there’s an expectancy and general happiness at ‘serving’ others. More so than the other decans-- this is about social/personal responsibility. Their actions influences those around them, and taking too much/too little is something they may be aware of.

It’s about the equilibrium y know? Like Taurus-- imagine the bull minding it’s own business grazing on the field. It’s not hurting anyone unless threatened, and if it sees something that threatens it it doesn’t back down.

Being considerate of others, if you want others to be considerate to yourself is also a thing they may be attuned with. Subconsciously or not-- there’s social etiquette or expectancy they agree with/work within in order to create a ‘system’ that benefits everyone.

It’s about being fair and playing fair in this case-- where they can see, how certain action/inconsideration may hurt others so they hold back from doing so. They’re socially conscious in a way that they may not notice-- often it may just be intuitive (Mercury/Venus) and how they’re naturally picking up on these things without realizing.

Trust that with the combination of Virgo/Taurus -- if something is seriously wrong/hurting/against their own values. They’re the type to politely point out why in a critical and straight-forward manner.

Most of the time, they’re mild-mannered and peaceful. But that doesn’t mean she’s a push-over. She knows when and when not to do something-- she just has strong social nuance to her as well (people smart, but more like sociable smart. Naturally popular as well)

Because she does have this Taurusean decan with her Virgo Sun--- there’s a strong inclination for Virgo/Taurus to seek pursuits that allows their creativity to shine through, or show them in a good light. Fashion, make up -- certain ‘materials’ that can enhance/showcase this creative pursuit is also something that may also interest them as well.

Nayeon’s beautiful singing voice might also be attributed to how many Mercury decans and Venusian influences she has in her placements.

In her sun-- that talks about the self, ego, purpose, esteem/confidence-- finding a ‘purpose’ for yourself also attribute to being able to be creative and non-restrictive.

Virgos typically have pretty clear voices, depending on other things as well-- they can also have different shade/ranges to them.

With Virgo/Taurus in her Sun (and in her context) -- there’s a steady-marching beat to her progress upward. Virgos-- like every other Virgo decans, may have a certain personal standards and assessment of quality (external) to them. With Taurus in the mix-- it’s finding quality of life.

The main focus/goal of Virgo/Taurus is to find a high enough quality of work/life/personal philosophy that allows them to prosper at a ‘stable’ pace. It’s not about biting off more than you can chew, or putting herself in a place where she doesn’t have any ‘stability’. That’s a no-no since her anxiety would sky-rocket with how unstable her life is (and without support/socially as well -- Venusian sign after all)

It’s about finding personal contentment--- pushing from the internal out (nocturnal signs) starting with a good ‘thinking/mind-set’ that they can carry and revisit/re-energize from whenever they feel lost/unbalanced.

This internal ‘good mindset/thinking’ also helps with keeping the person humble, trying hard, friendly and not get big-headed.

Taurus curbs some of Virgo’s over-thinking and stress/worries that can be obsessive or pointless. It’s a breath of fresh air that decisively cuts off terrible habits (that she might still have) and open your perspective.

Simple questions like ‘Am I happy?’ or ‘Am I doing what makes me happy?’ --- simplification of things, certainly helps Virgo Suns out alot. Don’t overcomplicate it.

Besides this-- Virgo/Taurus can also be very very patient/tolerant people. Not to the extent that they TAKE everything you throw at them, but if it’s working towards a purpose that is personally fulfilling to them (light at the end of the tunnel) -- they can take a lot of pressure before they break (given that they have enough stability/nurturing around them as well)

Honestly, I’d say having the girls around her is such a big part of what keeps this Virgo from not being lonely.

Loneliness is always a thing that most Virgos suffer from. Isolated obsession/thoughts and can quickly become their personal demons sometimes, and increase anxiety/darkness inside of them that can affect their entire disposition quickly (like poison in the vein, spreading quickly).

Virgo/Taurus takes a lot of things on their own, but don’t let them be alone. Don’t let them be lonely or lost in their own over-bearing thoughts by themselves. Sometimes they can sink too deep too fast, getting ‘stuck’ in their own ‘what do/to do = despair’. Mutables are sensitive--- make sure to look after them too.

Last few notes on Virgo Sun in the Taurus decans-- they are amazingly warm-hearted and generous. Protective of those they love, but also appreciative of their efforts and ‘nature’. They’re the type of people (she’s the type of person) who doesn’t like pretenses or pretentiousness.

Approaching her truthfully as you are --- with your shyness, nervousness, etc. Is endearing and shouldn’t be seen as a flaw. Because they’re so accepting and generous-- they’re selective with people who come to them. People who are willing to listen, to let down part of their shield and let themselves believe that there’s love, hope and betterment in the world (this they can teach them, but only if that person lets them.)

Most of all--- they’re simply looking for people who are open and receptive. People who are just themselves, isn’t hiding or lashing out at others unnecessarily.

Isn’t putting on airs--- god, people who put on airs or ‘pretend’ to have/be something they’re not probably piss them off the most. Most Virgos wouldn’t even engage with them-- and that’s the same with Nayeon here.

You might think certain ‘pretenses’ like ‘let’s go on this holiday’ or ‘lets do something together’ is unnecessary--- but for Virgo/Taurus sometimes this is just a way to find fulfillment and emotional bond with people.

Given they aren’t the most emotional of people (by themselves, often logical/rational people more than you realize/when it comes to serious decisions) but this is engagement.

It’s something that creates memories or experiences with people, it’s something that isn’t showy/out-there but can make a huge difference in the dynamic if you indulge them or allow them to do this with you. They literally never ask for anymore more than just--- experiences with you, good memories and getting to know you better. This is all they ask for. So let them do it with you.

Leo Moon (3rd Decan/Aries)

Lovely!!! 💕 They are so lovely I love Leo Moons!! 💕💕💕💕

Leo brings a certain stability to the Virgo Sun above-- if all else fails, this Leo Moon will shut down everything else in order to get Shit Done even if it’s themselves/their own emotions (compartmentalize/internalize emotions sometimes)

Charming, affectionate and loyal --- Leo Moons don’t give themselves enough credit even when they deserve to be loved the way they want to be.

They are rather romantic, and sometimes they can often re-enact something out or speak to inanimate things if their other placement/aspects fit into that as well (kinda like, self-expression by themselves that makes others who observe them kinda go ????)

Leo is also a fire-moon, so self-expression is a big thing for this people. Particularly, when it comes to performing/performance-- these people may naturally attract people to them because of how naturally alluring they are.

Alluring as in their vitality and liveliness-- in the third decan of Aries-- it’s about will-power and ‘standing out’ even when they’re not doing anything.

Aries as a cardinal sign ‘leads’ others naturally-- it helps Leo’s ‘stability’ in a way that-- if others are lost/lose track of what to do-- this Leo/Aries can naturally ‘show’ them where to go/what to do even without doing anything ‘out of the norm’ themselves.

It’s -- well, Leo Moons aren’t always out-going by themselves. It’s more to do with comfort and personal fulfillment. They don’t have to be the center of attention-- even when they’re loud-- it doesn’t mean they want attention to be on them.

It’s more to do with how comfortable they are with the people around them, with themselves. How empowered they feel by the situation/environment or those around them/themselves.

It has to do with self-empowerment, how receptive people are to them. Because they can be sensitive and shy if people aren’t receptive to them-- and may often hold themselves back because of that as well.

The Lion isn’t the one who demands people respect them/abide to them. They rule by just being themselves, by being selected. They have a sense of self, but also has a respect for the public opinion as well. And Leo people are the same as well.

With that said-- there’s something to be said about Leo Moons because they like to be comical when they’re comfortable. They make expressions (self-expressive) they make jokes, they co-operate with you if you ask them for help with anything.

They’re generous people-- and with the Moon ruling emotionality, being able to offer a slice of happiness/joviality to others and being able to ‘give’ certain help fulfill a sense of Leo pride as well 💕

Often times, you might find yourself with a Leo Moon friend who although they stick to themselves-- is actually rather down-to-earth and chill to hang out with. Most Leo Moons don’t hold themselves above others, it’s just the impression they give off that deters people away sometimes.

But Leo Moons are people who re-affirms you, who gives you courage and strength, who looks you in the eye and tell you they believe in you.

They’re the type to celebrate your victories with you, cheer you on and genuinely encourage you to get out of your shell/insecurities. They can be insensitive when it comes to themselves-- but they are always supportive/encouraging when it comes to small victories with your progress as well.

The ‘noble’ nature of Leos when applied to social realms/people around them has more to do with how they protect and nurture those around them. Almost like a guardian, although childish/silly by nature-- they embody both of the kiddish side and the side that understands responsibilities as well.

Leo is a social sign y know, they have a domain they look after-- the people they care about, their joys/support-- these people mean alot to them. And their appreciation/acceptance of the Leo’s natural playfulness is something Leo Moon can be sensitive about.

The ‘controlling’ side of Leos that has to do with their fixed/fire nature-- the side that may be a little possessive or protective of others-- comes when it applies to themselves.

If they themselves feel needy, feels threatened, feel unappreciated or undeserving of something. They grow frustrated and sometimes-- they retain that energy inwards into personal frustration.

They can lash out sometimes-- but most of the time you might just see them being pouty/whiny or sulky. They may try to ‘lighten’ the topic even if it hurts them more than they let on.

Being ‘too’ emotional is still a thing they are wary of (fire signs and vulnerabilities smh)-- so if they feel like their burdens are affecting others emotionally as well-- they may sometimes freak out bc they don’t know how to go about it from there ksjdnkj

It’s cute... but also like, they can be a little demanding and needy too. They seek to ‘do right’ by people-- and that can become judging/trying to nudge others into a better direction for themselves the way they see it.

Leo Moon ultimately wants the best for someone they care about-- but sometimes they can be focused on ‘getting them out of this situation’ that they can miscalculate the long-term effect/consequence of it as well.

Kinda like.... this is a problem, the person is crying because of it. Leo Moon moves in to comfort and pull/nudge them to get out and solve that problem--- but the problem isn’t resolved with just face-value sometimes.

It might need a little more introspection, a little more self-evaluation. There may be reason why it lingered as long as it did for that person without the Leo Moon realizing that y know?

Some problems aren’t for them to solve-- but for the Leo Moons themselves, their own happiness and resolving immediate issues works best for them. Long-term problem/situations can be resolved over time-- they are a fixed sign after all.

If hurt by a situation-- they can sometimes retain or get hung up on it because it hurts them emotionally. With a fire/fixed sign, sometimes it’s about how they use that fuel to empower them forward.

There’s a natural inclination to ‘do’ things in order to move away from it, but they also need to learn how to resolve things fully within themselves.

They might not realize they are constantly referring/acting back on the problem in a cycle without resolving the issue that started everything, communication sometimes-- is something that they avoid because they want to just move past/be chill with everything even when it bothers them.

Kinda like if you had a bad experience with this one person--- you move on but you don’t forget. Yet somehow, the people around you realize you’re hurt about this more than YOU realize it. Your actions/words are sometimes referring back to that situation/experience.

Self-awareness is something the Leo can learn and benefit from. Because they can sometimes retain things without realizing-- and thus, learning how to take notice and be aware of their emotional burdens regarding social/others is also crucial from them.

It’s that urge to ‘make things right’ with Leos that makes them stay ‘stuck’ in a problem sometimes. It builds up frustration as well-- whether it’s from lack of action/progression or from unresolved issue/something they have to deal with.

Ok anyways... let’s talk about Leo/Aries again ksjsknk with Leo in the Aries decan-- these people can be quite daring as well.

With the power of Mars behind them, they are mischievous sometimes and also ambitious when they put their minds to it. Competitiveness should be done in fair-sports, and they’re someone who enjoys encouragements from others who are their ‘equals’ to motivate each other to do better and better each time.

Kinda like camaraderie-- in good sportsmanship it happens where you grow to be self-confident in yourself when you have good encouragement and competition around you as well.

It’s that built of trust, respect and reliance on each other’s strength that lifts up the Leo/Aries Moon on it’s own. They believe in other people’s strength, and when people believe in their strength that’s independent from them (self-reliant) they prosper best and shine bright as well.

They believe in the good hard grind-- since working hard allows them to relax and be less stressed as well. A good day at work means that they’ve shown/given their best/what they’ve got. The reward at the end-- is just simply good feelings and enjoying each other’s company without jealousy and pretenses.

These people are more active than they realize-- with Aries as their decan, they sometimes don’t realize their sociability power is alot more than they give themselves credit for. On off days-- they can sometimes spend period of time adventuring with friends, take a chance, travel. See things.

Leo Moon also loves learning, new things, experiences. They’re enthusiastic even if it’s low-key, but genuinely curious about growing/seeing new sights and places and people that they haven’t seen/met before. They’re much more ‘daring’ than they realize this way as well skjnskjkss

One thing that should be note-- is that Leo/Aries would want to see whatever they put their effort/hard work into bear fruits and actually manifest into palpable thing. There’s no happiness in something that flunks and fails-- they like results.

Their fiery part can sometimes surface a lot more when they see something going wrong despite their efforts into it --- the controlling part of Leo comes out full-force, managing and organizing the process until they can get the ‘result’ they wanted.

With tremendous power-- it comes to say that they may often prefer those who are clever and insightful. Scorpios in particular-- tend to soothe this Leo/Aries nature better because 1) they are just as intense and 2) they understand their work-ethic, yet they are much cooler emotionally than the Leo as well.

It’s a sense of balance-- since Aries/Libra would talk about that as well. But finding someone who ‘complements’ or balance the enthusiastic Leo Moon well with their insights and temperament makes it easier for the Leo/Aries to ‘be themselves’ and move forward the way they want--

They ‘trust’ the other person will be able to match them independently as well, and they don’t have to ‘slow down’ or ‘hold back’ with them.

Libra Mercury (3rd decan/Gemini)

We’re finally at the meat of the placements, with Nayeon she gives off a lot of Venusian vibes because she has it in her Mercury and ALSO her Venus (1st decan there)

Besides this-- it also complements her Virgo/Leo combination as well. As someone who’s genuinely curious about others, and often an excellent listener --- she knows when to give advice and when to NOT.

This is important, because most people don’t know when to NOT give advice. A part of being good at communicating is knowing what others need -- and in some cases, learning how to NOT give an opinion/advice is more helpful to the overall progress than doling it out anyways.

It’s not about ‘predicting’ what others want/need to hear-- whether we think it’s the cold harsh truth or soothing helpful words-- Libra is about being truthful and honest.

It’s not about holding the self back, but rather having the space/time to process and learn from different perspective in order to make a decision in the end.

It’s organization and effective planning essentially-- before you decide to ‘tackle’ or ‘do’ something about a situation --- you might want to see it through and get a clear plan out first.

As a cardinal sign and ‘doing things’-- Libra in this sense is more about gathering information and processing them.

‘Action’ doesn’t always have to be palpable like how we see Aries/Capricorn do it-- ‘action’ can also be ‘pre-action/planning’ and internal action taking place.

With Libra Mercury -- there’s always a consideration for ‘others’, what’s it like in other people’s shoes? How would they see it, how would they feel

A lot of the Libra’s indecision has more to do with being ‘thorough’-- or rather, as ‘thorough’ as they can get (perfectionist streak)

They like to weigh perspectives, often times they can also fear retaliation/feedback to an extent --- if someone starts pointing out something that ‘attacks’ them (the consequences/repercussions)-- they feel guilty about not putting that into consideration (that’s on their work-ethic)

On the other hand, they work extremely hard to be thoughtful and considerate-- going the extra mile to make sure it comes across the way they want it to be. Crafted, mindful.

Their intention is there-- but if the consequences/repercussion happens (being attacked or not being heard, things escalating) then they’ll have to resort to different tactics--- persuasion and manipulation to get what they want (charm)

It can be minor-- or it can be dangerous. But there’s also a sense of passive-aggression sometimes in the way they direct this outwards.

Persuasiveness is only half the thing, the other half is compulsion and sometimes that requires ‘intent’ that stems from passive-aggressiveness.

Sometimes-- it can just be being Diabolical. If you think your Libra friends are nice, think again. They know what they’re doing behind the scene even if they aren’t overt about it.

@rkkive just described this to me: ‘presenting it to them as a better option; ‘why have this when you can have that?”’

That pretty much describes persuasion tactics they sometimes use. Whether it’s jokingly, serious, just for fun or whatever purpose its for. Sometimes its just a point of strategy--- nothing personal, it’s just how to come out on top after all (don’t like losing)

Whilst people talk a lot about Libra’s ability to compromise-- more prominently is in their ability to NOT compromise but rather switch tactics. Distract, divert or smarter/less-overt way to get what they want without letting people know that their feathers are ruffled. They’re immensely smart-- but it’s up to your own wit whether you ‘catch’ them or not.

For all the saying that Libra is peaceful or ‘pushovers’ -- sometimes they’re just plain bratty.

There’s no denying this-- the ‘peaceful’ aspect is more about ‘equilibrium’ and frustration with the lack of it can cause a lot more mayhem and diabolical nature to come through.

They’re only ‘pushovers’ as much as they just let people ‘think’ that about them-- whilst they know there’s inner power/control in how they work/present certain things to get what they want in the end.

They like debate, they like Winning. You think Aries are the only ones who can fight? Think again. Libras are also fighters but only when the fight is in their court. Why try to fight in someone else’s when you have a better chance winning in yours? It’s strategy (think smart)

Anyways-- Libra/Gemini decan are very chatty, sometimes they’re just easy to talk to. People might approach and think they’re close, reveal things to them without Nayeon even asking.

The effect of Venus/Mercury honestly gives you a person who essentially--- finds themselves in the middle of ‘locals’ telling them their stories without even asking for it. There’s an easy-going nature and trust-worthiness about her because of how ‘truthful’ she seems-- reliable and dependable by others.

Yet at the same time, for the Libra/Gemini themselves-- they may be taken off-guard by ‘why’ people are telling them these things because to them-- they are just being cordial y know?

When there’s Gemini involved, gestures can sometimes be used to communicate efficiently (if Leo Moon brings excitement, sometimes it’s in her motions/showing excitement as well) rapid conversations over long-period of time is common for people of these decan.

Whilst Libra of other decans can sometime tire or need rest-- Libra Mercury in the 2nd decan can talk for looong period of times if they’re genuinely interested and kept stimulated by their conversation partner.

Part of why Nayeon is so well-loved is how well she presents herself right? She’s a smart lady, tactful and funny. She knows when to be uplifting, comforting, when to be respectful. She knows boundaries bc she has them herself, and she understand/relies on others to support her as well.

Partnership is a big part in Libra’s behaviour-- no it doesn’t always mean it has to be ‘romantic’ or ‘clingy’ -- it just means you rely on others for mental rapport as well as your own. That you become ‘strength’ to others in some ways-- because Libra Mercury may often find themselves helping others more than themselves/disclosing parts of themselves sometimes.

With this said, Libra Mercury is a good placement because her head is screwed on to follow rational, logical reasoning rather than emotions/feelings the heart sometimes.

Her distance-- the gathering of perspective-- also serves to make a ‘bigger view’ plan of action to those involved/could benefit from.

Instead of behaving brashly-- she may be more of the type to argue to wait, or strategize/plan better before moving forward with something (voice of reason/patience).

This rational/logical part also means that sometimes-- she’s ‘colder’ than we see her as well. Knowledge is power, and sometimes you have to be able to make ‘cold’ decisions in order to move/progress forward.

With the combination of Virgo/Libra-- I don’t doubt she’s much more logical, critical and rational than she lets on (a smart lady!) 💕

Libra Venus (1st Decan)

Next we’re onto the lovely Libra Venus!! 💕 With Libra being domicile here, AND in it’s first degree-- Nayeon gets the full effect of Libra in her placement 💕💕💕

Kindness and charitable quality is often a hallmark of these people-- although less loud and more understated than Sagittarius/Piscean/Jupiterian usually (charitable/generousity) -- the ‘kindness’ that Libras shows to those around them and their social/environment often touches the heart of others.

They’re subtle, down to earth. Often times they garner admirers to them because of how chill and ‘next-door’ type they are. These people often comes across as someone who you can meet in your everyday life, accessible yet mentally and emotionally occupied skjksnks

As in -- YOU might think you stand a chance, but in reality these Libra Venusian are kinda pre-occupied already with their mental engagement. They’re an air-sign, air cardinal even. If you think they’re going to wait around for you to ‘catch’ them then you thought wrong.

Their air-ness gives them a mental kind of engagement. To love a Libra you also have to have their interest first, before they capture yours. A part of what Libra’s like is that they aren’t limiting themselves-- so if you think you’re good enough for them, whoops maybe you thought wrong because they haven’t seen everything you have to offer.

Certain things like your mannerism, your lack of thought, certain actions can turn them off just like that. It takes a while for relationship to build and develop-- at least to the point where they’re ‘alright’ being with someone. This is the realm of the mind-- how are you supposed to Know you like someone until you can see them clearly for who they are, how they act, or any little thing that might piss you off??

Think logically--- don’t be blinded by your rose-googled vision. Some people let traits of their lovers slide because they were pre-occupied with loving them already, but that might turn out to be more of a ‘trouble’ point when the rose-google leaves y know? The Libra Venusian makes sure that they aren’t compromising themselves, that this person really isn’t going to piss them off or annoy them in the future.

You have to have a certain stability/certainty in order to ‘trust’ someone. And a Libra ‘trusting’ you and being with you in a relationship is only the first step to them opening the door for feelings to bubble up, y know?

That’s like.... you’re doing prep-work, ‘intro to liking’ course instead of falling into a relationship right now immediately. These things takes time and effort-- co-operation and concentration. You have to be on equal grounds and understanding with the Libra.

And yeah, maybe it’s not the most romantic thing if you’re a very gung-ho romantic person who has a lot of feelings. But trust that it has it’s perks-- if a relationship doesn’t work out, then the ending will be mutual/less hurtful. And if it continues-- then it’ll be stable, strong and grounded/balanced in how you work together.

It’s not all cut and dry-- you just gotta learn how to appreciate the quality they bring to the relationship as well. They ARE kind and often fair to you, and they ARE willing to listen, learn, adjust and accommodate you with their generosity. They just aren’t ‘fooled’ by the rose-googled vision. So you have to accept that about them as well.

Their willingness in particular --- is a quality you should consider as part of their best trait. They’re willing to try things out for you, with you. They’re willing to listen and possibly work things out. As long as you have the same kind of decency, respect and gentleness they show you. Alot of the time they can appreciate what YOU bring, just as long as you appreciate what they bring (complement yours) as well.

Being dismissive of a Libra’s effort and strength-- their subtle charm and offers is something they WILL probably be offended by. The thing above about ‘decency’ is important--- because often times, the Libra WILL have visions for where the relationship is going and what to expect.

They’re planners and analyzers-- if they feel like you’re hurting them, out to hurt them or is taking advantage of them somehow/not pulling your weight-- they WILL become passive-aggressive and more resentful as well to retaliate (mirror/reflection).

I really can’t understate how much Libra Venus will share with you -- personal, objective, anything really. If they trust you, and like you-- they will be generous with you to the point where you essentially have someone who cares about you in a way you’ve never had before (partnership)

This isn’t like a motherly/fatherly or sibling ‘nurture’ -- this is a partnership nurture. Where you’re on equal grounds, there’s no ‘familial’ relationship to rely on. They’re just-- great at making sure you know where you stand with them when this is the case.

With the combination of Leo as well-- Nayeon may often be a good nurturer as well as someone who likes to be nurtured. This in essence is ‘sharing’ -- sharing of affection, sharing of thoughts/rapport and trust. This is how she self-expresses her affection for others-- being considerate, taken care of.

Being thoughtful and mindful, complementing each other in ways they ‘make up’ for each other. It’s about that partnership--- and appreciation for what SHE has (Leo Moon) that the other person DOESN’T have that makes them ‘fit’ together well.

Scorpio Mars (1st Decan)

Ooooof we’re finally here at Scorpio Mars!!

With Scorpio Mars-- there’s a high concentration power, self-will and self-drive. Sometimes they can be prone to ‘shutting down’ everything else and working on something-- tunnel-vision can sometimes be common in Scorpios

In Mars (where Scorpio is domicile) whenever they’re stressed they may also keep to themselves. Quiet-natured although not necessarily stressed, just collected. You can tell when a Scorpio Mars is concentrating because they become less talkative, more focused on action/doing and that’s usually a sign that this Mars is working here.

There’s no need to be so flashy or wordy when you just have to put your money where your mouth is. With Scorpio Mars-- it’s more about demonstration, doing, ‘proving’ that they can achieve the final product. Not to gloat in anyone’s face or anything like that-- but rather for their own personal satisfaction instead.

See-- because Scorpio is a water/fixed sign, there’s an essence of ‘deep-rooted’ ness to their nature. Work hard, be conscious. Put in effort. It’s intuitively driven in a way--- the part where they’re essentially the Terminators and doesn’t stop until their battery runs out.

Self-control is something that --- whilst they DO have (in the context that they’re self-contained) they’ll need to learn when ‘done is done’ and not get frustrated at themselves when they literally DON’T have to exert themselves so much to get the result.

In this case-- it’s more like the satisfaction of working harder but not necessarily smarter. These Scorpio Mars can be in it for the Good Grind-- and essentially, when they FEEL like they haven’t done ‘enough work’ to ‘deserve’ something, they get frustrated for this reason alone.

They WANT to grind-- that’s the thing. They’re closeted gym rats without talking about it. Whether it’s desk-work, research, essays, gym, work out etc. When it requires concentration it becomes ‘work’.

And ‘work’ in this sense isn’t the Capricorn thing where its WORK work-- this is work in the sense that they want to put their power/energy into it just for the sake of self-expression, of being able to do so and ‘work’ on something. This is a love for the PROCESS of working, not necessarily the result. They LIKE ‘working hard’ -- that expulsion of energy and getting/grabbing a result from their own power.

Y know, like instead of seeing it as something that would eventually float up to them without doing anything-- this is more about the power to DO something in order to get it. To not wait around for it to happen but rather-- be in CONTROL of the situation and get shit done about it.

With Scorpios it’s like they seek external control through bringing the internal out. Compared to Taurus-- who seeks internal control through the external. They are in essence-- oppositions in this case.

That’s why when the Scorpio Mars are the quietest-- when they’re cool and controlled on the external is when they’re keeping themselves from dealing out the final blow. And that’s when they’re essentially the scariest as well-- because Scorpio will Not mince itself up for others.

They can be quite competitive-- and possessive-- but quietly so. They don’t necessarily feel ok with airing their dirty laundries or every feelings they have. Especially ones that they’re aiming to ‘overcome/achieve or win’ over.

This plays a lot in their concentrating power as well-- as they can sometimes be ‘obsessed’ with something and put their concentration on that instead. There may be phrases where she just gets into THIS thing in particular and binge on it. Things like that can happen as well.

Since they’re intuition heavy-- sometimes they can close their eyes and just pick from gut-feelings as well. If all else fails-- if their Libras gets too much, their Virgo too buzzed and their Leo has left the building--- this Scorpio Mars makes the final decision.

As a singleton in her chart-- everything else might be measured against this Scorpio Mars as well. As in -- her Virgo, her Leo and her Libra will have to measure up to this Scorpio Mars that can be prominent in her self. Sometimes secretive, self-controlled/contained and somewhat will-full. She’s much more stubborn (Leo/Scorpio) than she realizes.

Conclusion

Not only is she so lovable-- she retains a youthful energy to her (child-like) because her Sun is opposition to Saturn (Pisces)

There’s three things to talk about here, first is that ‘no im an adult but im a YOUNG adult’ energy about her-- yes, responsibility and all that. But it emphasize the fun-loving part even more. There may be rejection of authority/regulations along the line-- making her quite the troublemaker/mischevious playful person she is as well

Second is that Virgo/Pisces opposition-- with this, her natural self-expression/showing vulnerabilities and emotionality is actually a little in conflict. As in-- she may be hyper-sensitive sometimes, but may not always like that about herself (mutable) sometimes working through this means confronting what Saturn in Pisces means.

People with Saturn in Pisces may often have had their creative self-expression stifled/told that it’s not what others wanted in the past. Thus, they stifle themselves going forward. In Nayeon’s case-- it might be to do with her singing abilities as a part of her creative expression (or the way she dress, present herself, her artistic work, whatever people nit-picked her on) --- they’re sensitive people. And thus-- sometimes it carries through into adulthood and insecurities about themselves. Feeling uncomfortable showing certain vulnerabilities/range of expression can also be common for these people as well.

Third--- is Sun/Saturn opposition which can often make someone a little more self-conscious of themselves. They may sometimes think a problem is a big spectacle that made them super embarrassed cause everyone’s laughing at them/saw it-- but is actually just them being harsh on themselves and less ‘serious’ than they think it is. They may also dwell a little on the insecure side-- a little hesitant to do things because there’s so many oppositions/consequences and they’re not an extremely confrontational/offensive person.

For the people with these placements--- allowing yourself to work through the blockage by self-affirmation and truly believing that you ‘deserve’ things is important to you. Your Saturn is holding/restricting your ego (the Sun) to a degree where it can sometimes be unnecessary. So working through that is important

There’s a fear of unblocking that and then finding out she isn’t so ‘humble’ anymore-- but these people also have to realize ‘confidence’ isn’t the same as ‘arrogance.’ They fear themselves the most-- their behaviour, of how people view them. Perhaps not realizing they were being ‘arrogant’ when they really weren’t (and should stop listening to people who tell/project their insecurities onto them)

Nayeon is also--- super smart?? like she has her Sun/Pluto (sextile) and Sun/Uranus (trine) but what’s holding her back is her own modesty/parenting herself (Sun/Saturn above) -- she can quickly resolve issues, figure out a puzzle, is quick-thinking when she wants to be (Virgo after all)

Her Moon is square to Pluto-- which can often exemplify this Leo Moon nature a lot. We see it in her persona, who she is. How playful and cute she is, affectionate and lovable. This is Leo Moon when it’s comfortable (which I’m glad she is!) at the same time-- there’s a distinctive private/public persona in which ‘controlling’ certain emotions and personal feelings is concerned.

She can be tumultuous sometimes, heightened emotions and lash out. Even when she doesn’t realize it-- because her Leo Moon/Scorpio Pluto is pretty strong-- it can create a very dynamic person who pushes/aggresses others even when her Libra keeps her back in other context/time.

Because her Mercury is square to Neptune/Uranus (Capricorn) -- she can often times take on a route that’s more ‘Capricornion’ sometimes-- that is, grounding herself in the root making things seems ‘objective’ or ‘favourable’ in the sense that it better business moves. Libra in essence can ‘adapt’ certain things to use with it’s tactic/intent-- and in this case, sometimes it’s using it’s foe as a point of attack/technique instead.

Alrighty 💕💕💕 That’s all for the lovely Nayeon!! 💕💕💕 I hope this makes you feel like you got to know her better, and kinda-- help out with understanding her a bit more!! 💕💕💕💕 Tomorrow I’ll have Jeongyeon and Dahyun out!! 💕💕

#im nayeon #nayeon #na yeon #twice #twice astrology #twice nayeon #nayeon twice #kpop astrology #im na yeon #twice scenario #twice reactions #twice imagines #jyp entertainment #nayeon scenario #nayeon react #nayeon imagine

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wistfulcynic · 6 years ago

Text

Another Brick In The Wall: Chapter 8

a/n: Effusive thanks to @hollyethecurious for the artwork! I love it so much! Thanks also to everyone for reading, commenting, kudos-ing, and reblogging! I'm so pleased by the way people have been engaging with this story. Love you all xxx

Summary: Emma Swan, sheriff’s daughter, mayor’s niece, quarterback’s girlfriend, is the undisputed princess of Storybrooke High. She is smart and confident and used to getting what she wants. What she wants is Killian Jones, the new boy in school. But Killian is not easily manipulated, and reluctant to allow the dark secrets in his past to touch the girl he is rapidly falling in love with.

Rating: T

Tags for: @darkcolinodonorgasm @jennjenn615 and @resident-of-storybrooke

Chapter 8:

Killian was out of school for a week, for a “mental health break” he called it with a chuckle, apparently a term he’d gotten from Dr Hopper. He saw the psychiatrist daily during this break and spent the rest of his time at the harbour with Liam, working on their boat, reading, playing his guitar, and talking with his brother about everything that had happened.

“We’ve hashed it all out in excruciating detail,” he told Emma as they sat together in the boat’s cabin, she working on her college essays while he practiced a new song. “It’s such a relief to be able to really talk to Liam again. There was a time when we had no secrets between us. He showed me all the information he had collected on Milah and her situation. Apparently her divorce is almost finalised and next month she’s starting a job teaching English in Japan.” He smiled. “She’ll like that, a chance to travel. What she always wanted.”

“Hmmmph,” said Emma, glaring at the screen of her laptop as she typed rapidly.

“Swan,” he admonished, giving her a mock scowl as he strummed a chord at her.

Emma slammed her hands down on the keyboard. “Killian, I just don’t know how you can be so forgiving after what she did to you.”

He set the guitar aside and his expression became serious. “I have to be, don’t you see?” he asked, looking at her intently. “I can’t hold on to my anger or it will eat me alive. I didn’t even realise how angry I was until Dr Hopper helped me see it, and how by not acknowledging it, allowing myself to feel it, and then letting it go, I was only hurting myself. Besides, I did genuinely care about Milah, and I’m glad she’s finally in a place where she can be happy.”

“Hmmmmph.” Emma concentrated on deleting the gibberish she’d produced by her attack on the keyboard.

“A place that doesn’t include me,” said Killian brightly, picking up the guitar again and plucking out a cheery tune. “That’s good, isn’t it Swan?”

“I suppose so,” she grumbled. “Though I’d still prefer if the place was dark and scary and full of nettles.” He laughed heartily at that and she couldn’t hold back an answering smile. “Hey, I’m nearly done with this, will you read it over and make sure it’s okay? Just check my grammar and punctuation and stuff.”

“Of course, love, though I’m sure it’s already brilliant.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Freed from the weight of his worry and guilt, Killian gradually began to smile more easily, and his witty, teasing nature (“cheeky git,” Liam called him, his voice irritated but with a relief so profound it bordered on joy in his eyes) came more readily to the fore. When he returned to school the following Monday, he moved through the halls with a swagger that Emma had never seen on him before. Unlike the arrogant, bullying one that Neal always had Killian’s evoked a simple self-assurance that she had to concede looked really good on him. Despite how much emotional baggage he still had to work through he clearly wasn’t burdened by shame anymore, and equally clearly did not intend to take any crap from anyone.

This made itself evident that morning when he shut his locker and turned towards his first class, only to find himself confronted by Felix and Rufio.

“Really, chaps?” he said, raising an eyebrow at them. “You couldn’t even wait until after school so you could chuck me into the bins, like proper high school bullies?”

This mockery went clean over the other boys’ heads, and they continued to block his path, trying to look intimidating while also trying not to be intimidated by Killian’s calm demeanor and his amused expression.

Felix, the sligtly cleverer of the two, suspected he was being laughed at but couldn’t put his finger on why. He didn’t like it.

Bristling, he sneered at Killian. “Bet you think you’ve won,” he snarled. “Now that Neal’s in jail and out of the way. Now you can move in on Emma like you did on that—” he broke off as Killian stepped into his space. There wasn’t much difference in height between them, but somehow Felix had the impression of Killian towering over him, his face calm but his eyes darkly furious, and for once in his life he felt a stab of genuine fear.

“I’m only going to say this once,” growled Killian in the new, lower register his voice had taken on more often of late, “So you’d better listen carefully. Your mate Neal is a criminal, and not even a good one. He’s in jail because he’s stupid, and that’s nothing to do with me. I have no doubt it’s where he’d always have ended up eventually. Bit of advice: If you’re going to steal confidential information, don’t take pictures of the evidence on your phone, and definitely don’t then show those pictures to the sheriff’s daughter. Neal got what he deserved. I now consider this matter closed, and if you or anyone else—” he raised his voice so that the rapidly assmbling crowd of onlookers could all hear, “—tries to take it any further, you will not care for the repercussions.”

Felix wasn’t sure what “repercussions” were, but the hint of repressed violence in Killian’s manner made him keen not to find out. He had always been content to follow Neal, less out of respect for the other boy than a simple unwillingness to make a thing out of Neal’s belligerent insistence that he should be the one in charge, but he’d always sensed that there wasn’t much substance underneath Neal’s bluster. Killian however didn’t bluster. He simply stated facts, and Felix could tell that he was not the sort of person to make a threat he couldn’t back up with action. Perhaps it was time to step out of Neal’s shadow, thought Felix, and take over leadership of their little gang. He certainly couldn’t do a worse job of it than Neal had, and escalating a pointless conflict with a guy who looked prepared to fight dirty if necessary was much more Neal’s style than Felix’s. He nodded at Killian, and stepped back. Rufio looked surprised but followed his lead.

Killian nodded back then transferred his glare to the crowd of onlookers, which had grown considerably in the past thirty seconds and now included Emma and Ruby, he could see out of the corner of his eye. “As for what you may have heard about me,” he said, loudly enough for all to hear. “It’s all true.” He smirked for a moment as a gasp went through the crowd, then his expression hardened. “It’s also no one’s business but mine, and those in whom I choose to confide. This is all I have to say on the subject. Now, if you’ll all excuse me I don’t wish to be late for class.” He slung his satchel over his shoulder and headed down the hall, turning his head briefly to shoot Emma a wink. People moved aside to let him pass and as soon as he had turned the corner furious whispering erupted in his wake.

Ruby pursed her lips. “I may have underestimated him,” she remarked.

Emma’s heart was pounding, a familiar occurrence where Killian was concerned, but this time it felt different. She’d been worried about how he would react to the ineveitable curiosity and questions from their classmates, but this smooth handling of a potentially explosive situation instead of calming her fears instead filled her with the wild desire to run after him, to fling herself into his arms and kiss them both breathless.

“He’s just so wonderful,” she sighed, and Ruby laughed.

“Down, girl,” she teased. “I’ll grant you this one’s worth your time, unlike the douchemaster general, but remember we’re in school. No one wants to see that.”

Emma rolled her eyes and gave her friend a shove, but the butterflies continued rhumba-ing around her insides, this time accompanied by an odd, hollow sort of ache as she remembered her resolution not to pursue Killian anymore. She was now all but certain that she loved him, that beyond the hot, tingly sensation she always felt in his presence lay a profound devotion. She would do anything for him, sacrifice anything to give him what he needed, and that terrified her. For the first time in her life Emma felt vulnerable, exposed, as though her chest were torn open and her heart lain bare to the mercies of fate and one gorgeous, troubled boy. She hated it. Even knowing that Killian would never intentionally hurt her was no consolation when the truth was that he could hurt her simply by caring deeply for her as a friend. If that was all she could ever have from him she would take it, she knew, without pushing for more, but it would be a wound on her heart that would never heal.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“He’s a bully,” shrugged Killian at lunchtime, when Emma, this time accompanied by a very inquisitive Ruby, found him in the library. “Bullies are just cowards at their core, and cowards are easy to intimidate. He won’t do anything because he won’t want to call my bluff. I might not be able to back it up but he’ll be too scared to risk finding out.”

“And what would you have done if he had called your bluff?” inquired Ruby.

Killian shrugged again. “Probably got the shit kicked out of me.”

“Would you have, though?” Ruby pressed, watching him through narrowed eyes.

He returned her stare with a look of wide-eyed innocence. “There were two of them to only one of me. Seems inevitable.”

“Does it?” Ruby’s disbelief was almost palpable, and having fenced with Killian for months now Emma shared her friend’s suspicion that he was deliberately underplaying his fighting skills.

“Let’s hope we never have to find out,” said Killian with a small smile, in a tone of voice that made it clear he would answer no more questions on the subject. “I quite like my face arranged the way it is.”

“It is a nice face,” said Ruby with a wolfish grin that widened as Killian’s ears turned pink. “But I didn’t come here just to flatter you. Victor asked me to ask you if he could have your phone number.”

“My number?” Killian blinked in surprise.

“Yeah, there’s some concert in Portland and he doesn’t have anyone to go with and he thought you might be interested.”

“Um, sure, I guess.” Killian rattled off the number and Ruby sent Victor a text. A minute later his phone buzzed and he looked at it, snorting as he read the message. “Bit of a wanker, your boyfriend,” he remarked to Ruby.

“I don’t know what that is but I’m somehow sure that Victor is one,” smirked Ruby. “Is that gonna be a problem?”

“Not at all, I’m rather fond of wankers,” said Killian absently as he typed his reply. “My brother is one, after all.” His phone buzzed again almost instantly and he raised an eyebrow at what he read on it.

“Ems, I think maybe we should leave the boys to their chat,” said Ruby, and as much as she hated to sacrifice free time with Killian, from the way he was fixated on his phone, his expression almost gleeful as he typed rapidly, Emma had to admit she was probably right.

“Okay,” she said. “See you in class in a few minutes, Killian. And maybe hang out after school?”

“Hmmm? Oh, I have an appointment with Dr Hopper at four, but I can text you when I’m done.”

“Okay.” She smiled at him but his attention was back on his phone, so she followed Ruby out of the library trying not to feel too disgruntled. Killian should have other friends, she told herelf firmly, male ones who shared his interests. That was normal, and he could use some normal in his life right now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Over the next few weeks, things at school settled back into a routine, albeit one that was markedly different than it had been. Neal had been officially arrested after David’s investigation, charged with burglary, theft, and theft of a medical record, and was facing up to five years in prison. His parents had put up their house as collateral to pay his bail, but weren’t allowing him to return to school.

“Not much point when he’ll just go straight back to the slammer after he’s sentenced,” said Ruby viciously. “So much for that football scholarship he was so cocky about.”

Emma tried to find some compassion for Neal and what was basically the wreck and ruin of his future, but couldn’t dredge up a single particle of it. He had committed several felonies for no other reason than to stick it to Killian for outsmarting him and for becoming her friend, and he’d committed them flagrantly and with no thought to the consequences. He’d probably thought there wouldn’t be any consequences. Killian was right: Neal deserved everything that was coming to him, if only for being so colossally, arrogantly stupid.

People still whispered about Killian as he walked through the halls but true to character he paid little attention. He did, however, gradually began to open up more and allow more of himself to show through his defences, willingly participating in classes and talking to people other than Emma and Ruby. By the time finals week arrived had actually made a few friends.

Killian reflected wryly that in a twisted sort of way Neal had done him a favour. With all his secrets now out on the open he was free to embrace the opportunity for a new life he’d found in Storybrooke. Not that there had been anything particularly wrong with the old life, at least since his father had finally left. He’d been a mean old drunk, Brennan Jones, and by the time he’d been forced to flee his creditors for good, stealing a boat from Bristol harbour and melting into the offshore underworld, his sons had been glad to see the back of him. Killian thought about what he himself had been like back then, before Milah, and even though it had only been about a year since he’d first become involved with her so much had changed both in his circumstances and in himself, he feared that hopeful, enthusiastic boy was lost forever. Who exactly had taken his place was the question Killian had asked himself daily for weeks now, and he still wasn’t sure how to answer it. He’d become so used to holding everything in, to keeping such a tight rein on his thoughts and feelings that letting them out, accepting that it was okay to express them had become almost unbelievably difficult. The only person he felt even remotely comfortable being fully himself with aside from Liam was Emma, whose support and friendship remained unwavering as he bumbled and struggled thorough the reclamation of his life, and he remained intensely grateful for it.

Only one thing about Emma troubled him-- that she no longer seemed to be interested in anything beyond his friendship. All the little hints and cues she had been giving him since they’d met were suddenly gone, and while he was relieved to be free of the added stress of constantly resisting something that part of him desperately wanted, he couldn’t help wondering if there was a darker motivation for this abrupt about-face. Perhaps, whispered an evil little voice in his head, Emma was actually more disgusted by his past than she let on and was simply too kind to tell him directly. Maybe the thought of him touching her turned her stomach now. He certainly couldn’t blame her if it did.

“What do you want from your relationship with Emma?” asked Dr Hopper one afternoon, after Killian had finally brought himself to mention the change in her behaviour. “Do you want it to be romantic?”

Killian frowned, struggling to sort through the complex tangle of his feelings about and for Emma. “I don’t want a romantic relationship with anyone,” he said finally. “I still feel too messed up for anything like that. But I— I’m still really attracted to her. I think about her all the time, about how we kissed at her party, and I want to kiss her again pretty much constantly, but then I remember Milah and how I thought I felt about her, and I just—”

“You don’t trust your judgement.”

“Yeah.”

“Killian, it’s important for you to remember that you have a much more equal relationship with Emma than you ever did with Milah.”

“Equal, with Emma?” Killian snorted. “You have met her, right?”

Dr Hopper smiled patiently. “I understand that you feel she’s beyond your reach, and that’s a separate issue, but what I mean by equal is that she’s your age and at your stage of life. With Milah you were constantly struggling to relate to her life and her experiences, and when you couldn’t you attempted to make up for that by offering her the affection and sexual attention she craved. You forced yourself to offer these things even though you didn’t genuinely feel them because you feared the consequences of not offering them. But with Emma there is no need to manufacture anything. She is placing no demands on you and therefore any attraction and affection you feel for her is genuine.”

“But what should I do about it?”

“Why should you have to do anything? You said you’re not ready for a romantic relationship, and that’s fine. Let yourself heal. The process is slow and frustrating, but believe me you are making progress. Let your feelings for Emma and your relationship with her develop at a pace that is comfortable for you. From what you’ve said it sounds like she will still be there when, if, you’re ready for more.”

“It’s more than likely she no longer wants more. And even if she did, what happens when she meets someone who isn’t so hopelessly fucked up? Then where does that leave me?”

“Why don’t you worry about that if —not when— it happens?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On the last day before winter break, Emma nervously approached Killian’s locker and handed him an invitation to her parents’ annual Christmas party addressed to him and Liam.

“It’s just a thing they do every year for their friends and our neighbours,” she began to ramble as he examined the card, certain he would refuse and wanting to delay that painful moment. “My mom loves to entertain, and my dad says it’s good for building a rapport between law enforcement and the community, and—”

“Swan,” interrupted Killian, giving her that soft, indulgent look that said he knew exactly what she was thinking. “I’m sure we’d love to attend. Thank you for inviting us.”

The butterflies soared in a grand jeté, and she felt like she was flying with them. “Great,” she said trying to keep her voice calm, “I guess I’ll see you then.”

Her delighted smile made his breath catch, and his answering grin set her heart galloping. Their eyes met and held, and as the end of semester chaos whirled around them they stood a breath apart, swathed in frustrated yearning and brittle tension, the only two people in the world.

Then the final bell rang, and they leapt apart, Emma smoothing her skirt with shaking hands while Killian ran his own trembling fingers through his hair.

“So, onion rings at Granny’s?” ventured Emma, wanting to kick herself for making him nervous again, after all her resolutions, hoping desperately he wouldn’t pull away.

Killian sighed in relief, tinged with a hint of disappointment. Granny’s was safe. “Sounds perfect, love,” he said.

#cs au ff #high school au #teenage captain swan #captain duckling #lieutenant duckling #another brick in the wall #profdanglaisstuff

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quartusbellum-blog · 7 years ago

Photo

SARA for the role of REGULUS BLACK using the faceclaim NICOLE MAINES.

I am very excited about your portrayal of this character! Not only have you given life to the plots hinted at in the skeleton, but you’ve threaded new layers of meaning into Regulus’ story. I can’t wait to see them explored on the dash!

ooc details

Name: Sara

Age: im a fandom grandparent

Pronouns: they/them

Activity Level: I’m around every day and enjoy making a mess of things in game

Other: No triggers though my character might end up triggering others. I’ll make sure to tag.

Acknowledgement: I acknowledge that the themes of this game may include triggering elements. I also acknowledge that my character may be harmed, coerced, or even killed (with player’s consent) during paras/events or may cause harm to or kill others during paras/events. Yep here4themess

჻ ჻ ჻ ჻

general ic details

Name: Regulus Arcturus Black

Age: 19 | January 23rd

Ships: Regulus is rather aromantic in manner so a romantic is unlikely. Even still, I’d be happy to try any ships, any nonromantic ships etc. Warning: please read the whole app prior to seeking a ship with Regulus given that any sort of romantic/nonromantic/sexual ship might contain triggering experiences.

TBH my dream ships are probably more found family/family oriented… polyamorous with an asexual asshole who is a little skew?

Gender/Pronouns: publicly Regulus is still he/him but there will be a blending and fucking up of pronouns as Regulus explores and comprehends her gender (likely ultimate ending but nonbinary is also possible). This is different then how i sometimes write trans characters because in this game one aspect of her narrative will be the concept of growing up and understanding she can be who she wants to be. Even if Regulus knew from a young age (which not all trans people do), Regulus would have innately rejected the idea because of the pride his mother has(d) in having the two heirs at a cost. This became even more pressing when Sirius left his role as heir and it landed to Regulus–suddenly Regulus’ choices shrank even more. Its only in death that she has started to comprehend that there are choices now.

So pronouns will be flying ALL THE WAYS but mostly reflecting how the character is presenting EXTERNALLY to others. FC will remain static but may not be used all the time due to the lack of stable presentation.

For this app He/Him were used exclusively as up until perhaps the past year Regulus presented exclusively as he/him.

Headcanon for transitioning Attisgalli Corrective Draught.

Face Claim: please provide two face claim options.

Nicole Maines

჻ ჻ ჻ ჻

bio questions

Please note, while this game is “canon” up until the start of the Wizarding War it does not stay canon and it’s quite divergent at the start of the game.

biography:

The Black Family is too old of a family line not to have gotten… muddled (never muddied) in the past. It shows on the family tree in little notations (a dark red swirl like an ink blot on their shoulder for vampire) or in burn-marks where a person used to be (for scum of the earth traitor). Sometimes, Regulus’ mother sniffed when explaining this, certain family members couldn’t do what needed to be done.

A little pruning never hurt anyone–not any more then a little cultivating did.

Regulus and Sirius Black might have been half brothers but that was simply the most prudent action their parents could take to make absolutely certain the bloodline continued. Sure, children that shared both parents blood would have been ideal but with Druella only providing girls and Orion not providing any… Walburga Black was always very good at problem solving. Perhaps the only problem she failed to solve was her eldest son Sirius–or maybe she almost fixed it with Regulus.

If Sirius Black was loud and brash and bright–Regulus was the opposite. He was a late talker and when he did start talking it was almost always a last mumbled as a last resort. It wasn’t that Regulus wasn’t intelligent but that he struggled to organize his thoughts and provide them to others–something that continued through childhood, through Hogwarts, and beyond. He preferred chess and finding patterns within potions, charms, and even Quidditch to social obligations.

Prone to being misunderstood when he did attempt to make friends (he wasn’t threatening that girl, he was warning her so she wouldn’t be hurt), Regulus over values any and all friends or family he has. As such, any disowning, death, or friendship breakup has been taken incredibly personally. Its no excuse, and Regulus knows that now more then ever, but the need for connection and purpose helped drive his passion for Voldemort. Regulus believed in what Voldemort was fighting, becoming a Death Eater would provide a structure that Regulus knew he would need outside of Hogwarts while learning how to manage the Black family vaults and investments, and there was a social aspect, too.

For all that Regulus was good at strategy and understanding how seemingly fragmented pieces of information fit together: he was too slow to understand what Voldemort’s real goals were and what they ultimately meant for his family (and the wizarding world, but his family, of course, was paramount). Regulus Black never woke up one day and started believing muggleborns were ‘okay’ or that his innate belief system was wrong. He woke up one day and realized that the few people he cared about were in danger in a way they did not, could not, understand.

The vampire blood was easy to get, although he hardly thought it would work. He had long since been in the habit of visiting Narcissa and feeding the prisoner James Potter. Adding a fail safe into James’ layers of memory charms was not easy but necessary. Most likely, even with the blood, even with over a month of planning, Regulus was certain he was going to die.

Which he did. It just didn’t stick.

It’s been almost a year since then and Regulus isn’t sure if it was the potion, the vampire blood, the way he died, or if he’s finally just turning into his mother’s child in ways he never wanted to–but Regulus Black can’t seem to get a grip on his emotions, or his tongue, the way he used to. In some ways, though, its a relief–like finally being able to peel off an ill-fitting skin for something new.

჻ ჻ ჻ ჻

my character is:

Please Provide the Following

A Belief that is Wrong

Please Describe a Belief your character has that is wrong. It can be something we, as players, know is wrong (ex. prejudice against werewolves ). Alternatively: How is your character lying to themselves (and how is is it shown externally).

Regulus has always had something about organization and if he thinks about it too much even he would have to acknowledge that it’s a lie. But Regulus generally doesn’t pay that much attention to the reality surrounding these habits, only the relief it brings him. His clothes are always pressed–even in his closet of a space with the Radical Alliance. The robes are cleaned, and charmed pressed, and hunt up in a very specific order. His bed is exactly one inch from the left wall. The trunk he keeps things in is under the bed and must not touch any of the posts or the wall. He keeps things perfectly separated inside the trunk. He counted the flur de lis on the carpet between his and Sirius’ bedrooms over and over and over again as a child. He can tell anyone how many panes of glass are in the windows at Hogwarts and even differentiate between wings of the castle. These habits (because, of course, that’s all they are, all they will ever be) didn’t start out so all encompassing but as Regulus grew up, as life became more complicated, choices too limited, finding ways to control it (even illogical ones) seemed to be the only answer.

If things are clean enough. If things are the right number. If he stops counting at the right moment, if he taps the right pattern : everything will be fine. There’s arithmancy in everything, he tells himself, because life has always been more bearable when he believes it to be true.

Job

Is Regulus Black Doing Anything? He isn’t sure, really. Certainly he doesn’t have a job–he’s never worked a traditional job a day in his life! He’s no longer a Death Eater. Can he continue to look after his family’s finances if he is, in a sense, dead?

Does he want to be alive? –Regulus wonders this sometimes, believing it not to be any sort of suicidal ideation but a simple, obvious question. Should he be alive? The answer is no.

Does he want to be–he doesn’t know.

As far as anyone knows (particularly Remus but also Marcus and Narcissa), Regulus Black has no job and is doing nothing but trying to pour his scrambled eggs of brain and impulse control back into some semblance of viability. Underneath that, Regulus Black is trying to pour his scrambled eggs of brain and impulse control back into some semblance of viability…and remember just what his next steps were supposed to be regarding the horcrux.

ooc questions

Writing Sample:

He’s at the stairs. Not the grand stars at the front of the house that fork and twist along the side of the foyer–but the back stairs. Servants stairs his mother would hiss if she saw them except none of their family have ever employed household staff.

House elves are bad enough, his mother says in his ear and Regulus jerks, expecting to feel her breath on his cheek but–nothing. Its nothing.

“I’ve food for the prisoner.” He says but its pointless because no one is listening. No one has been listening since Peter Pettigrew. Since Dumbledore. Since James. It is a mistake but they haven’t realized it yet.

He’s stood too long, frozen above the narrow staircase with a silver tray. Someone will see you–the thought hisses through his mind and Regulus knows, suddenly, with a clarity he’s been lacking: its not real. It’s not a part of this. A dream? The idea s fleeting and wilts under a brush of light as the curtains behind him are pulled open.

“Then go ahead, darling.” Narcissa says.

The memory jerks, skitters, speeds up.

“I’ve food for the prisoner.” He says. “I’ve food for–”

Regulus is down stairs and the food is gone, shoved to the side. The lip of the tray is pressed into his ankle but Regulus ignores it because–James.

“Listen to me,” Regulus is saying. It’s strange, like none of this is real because he can’t feel any of it. The words fall from his mouth because where is his tongue? His wand is tight in his left hand, the swirls carved into its handle cutting into his palm. He should smell blood, he thinks.

There’s nothing, though. The room is bleary with weak autumn light from a small window about ten feet above them. There’s a bed but James isn’t allowed to use it. He’s on the floor. Regulus is on the floor. No, he’s straddling James–James can’t move during this or else–or else.

James tenses under him and Regulus grabs a fist full of James’ fraying robes. “This is serious.” The robes are too tattered to bruise when Regulus’ jerks them. He can’t strangle James (and wouldn’t even if it would be a mercy)

“Why should I?” James, the fucker–it had been a month and he still had that smirk except there’s blood at the corner and this time (not the first time) Regulus can feel his stomach growl at the sight of it.

“It’s important.” Regulus has his wand pressed at James’ temple and his mouth brushes James’ cheek when he leans in to whisper. “You’ll thank me later.”

Regulus Black has never been good at mind magic.

When Regulus wakes up, he tastes salt water and bile.

Exploration:

Please share three things you’d like to explore. This could be a character changing sides, darker themes, or basic fiction tropes.

Family Lines: I think this game provides a particularly interesting set of circumstances regarding possible family lines. First there’s Narcissa and her condition–how did that happen? Possibly Regulus, trying to manage his life post cave and fucking up again ( or maybe it was a blessing?) I like to headcanon that maybe Alphard was a vampire and thats where the blood came from (open to other options). Speaking of, how has Walburga doing? And then there’s, of course, Sirius and all the brother’s baggage which is made even more complicated as (if this set up is accepted) Regulus sort of used Sirius’ best friend as a last will and testament–not that James remembers it yet. Last, … does Regulus even count as a live anymore and if not who has inherited ?

A Family Curse: The Black family has never exactly been known for its cool head and steady hands but Regulus, for all his somewhat muffled anxieties, has mostly stood out as awkward but not particularly memorable. In fact, it’s safe to say without his last name (and grades) Regulus probably wouldn’t have gotten much notice at all. That has largely changed now, although Regulus has trouble pin pointing why and how. There are a lot of factors, many of which no one else knows, and Regulus should care about that. He should be highly concerned–but those concerns evaporate before he can even generate a game plan to consider addressing it. Most seem to assume that its just Regulus taking after his mother. TLDR I’m interested in seeing what information he drops (likely not entirely clearly) without thinking it through and how the changes in demeanor and method impact both those who grew up with Regulus Black and those who didn’t. Don’t worry about wangst, I’m much more interested in throwing weird or intense tings at others then have Regulus mope.

Choices mixed in with all of that, Regulus has found himself well and truly on his own about making choices for the first time in his life. Sure, Remus might have ideas on what he should do, and Sirius, and Marcus, and Narcissa—but all of them have different goals, different expectations of what Regulus could do and in the end, Regulus doesn’t have to do anything. At the onset the only thing he does know is that he must do something about the horcrux…but how? When, where, and why? I want to see how different interactions with various characters might influence those choices and how Regulus handles managing his own reigns ow for better or for worse.

Gender: its so easy to boil gender and trans experience into one narrative but so often things are far…messier then that. Regulus is a character who hasn’t felt the ability to think overly hard (or pursue if he has thought of it) alternatives to gender even if the Wix Community at large is accepting (people turn into frogs, after all). This game provides a unique chance to explore gender through the lense of a character who is learning and failing and not overly confident (or overly feminine) but genuine in that (at least) if nothing else. Also, does being a vampire effect Attisgalli Corrective Draught?

Extras:

Anything else you’d like to provide?

#quartusbellumaccept #marauders roleplay #lsprg #hp skeleton #hprp

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pinkicingshopp · 4 years ago

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I Wise Woman Once Said Damn It I'm Getting A Maine Coon T-Shirt

There seems to be a I Wise Woman Once Said Damn It I'm Getting A Maine Coon T-Shirt quality control issue with the new diapers my husband ripped two diapers along the seam before I put this one on and in the morning this one had ripped open too. Hanes has partnered with adopt a soldier platoon and sent a fresh supply of t shirts socks and underwear to the wounded marines in afghanistan’s camp leatherneck it s hard to express how much we appreciate your incredible sacrifice and the sacrifice of all our country s brave men and women this day is for you. It’s a wonderful feeling feel the love in the room from the floor to the ceiling ️ home for christmas peaked at no 7 on the billboard 200 on this day in 1998 listen now

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8 1 ptr leveling exper a I Wise Woman Once Said Damn It I'm Getting A Maine Coon T-Shirt ce reduced fifth azerite armor ring added raid testing. So this is going to be a bit long but bear with me I had what I believe to be a pointless and incredibly frustrating experience with the assistant manager jamie at your auburn hills great lakes crossing location today I have been coming here for three years I frequent your orlando san marcos and new jersey locations as well at least once a year when we stop we usually spend 5 to 10 thousand dollars on your products the system is simple I go in park in a corner and bring bins to my corner sort them bag them move them to the front register and repeat today I brought a personal duffel bag as it holds about 8 to 12 of your bags worth of stuff I get told that i’m not allowed to use it because it’s policy not a big deal at all I say okay i’ll do that for the rest rather than rebag all of this i’ll just go up in line and pay for it and it can sit behind the counter seems pretty reasonable to me nope I got obstructed suggested that I might be stealing something and not allowed to pass stating if I don’t want to follow the system I can leave he then takes my entire duffel dumps it onto the floor and then rebags it into victoria secret bags then moves it to the front counter so it can be rang in I thought this was a little odd but hey he was doing all the work rebagging it so whatever i’m like dude i’m going to be spending about 8k today all I want to do is come in spend some money get out without any drama what’s the problem whoevers in charge should be thrilled with a sale like this we’re spending 8k keep in mind that I told him that I would do what he wanted and it wasnt’ a big deal and the response was to the effect of stop being lippy and just listen I told him what do you want from me I just agreed with you and said I would use your bags i’m not being lippy at all I know this because I said okay dude not a problem i’ll use your bags his response was maybe if you get to buy it i’m like what are you suggesting that an 8 000 order is something you guys don’t want he’s like yeah if you buy it i’m like dude we are spending 8k today why would I bag up a bunch of stuff and spend 2 3 hours picking our your fabulous product to not buy it anyway so I had 4 credit cards one card had 2 000 one had 3500 one had 2000 and one had 1000 because I am buying for multiple people I had 4 different cards all in my name I wanted one receipt for each card not a big deal to me right wrong again he cited some policy and said if the order is more than 750 items that they aren’t allowed to ring in under 750 items on any one receipt id like to point out that that amount is higher than your employees said they could take as a cash payment I asked him to please show me that I would understand better if I could just read it he was willing to do so he brought out the policy book and to my surprise what it actually said was words to the afffect of cash payments cannot be split up or over 750 items I forget the second half my immediate reply was so what’s the big deal im using credit not cash he snatched the policy book away from me at that point and said you know what you can just listen to me or I don’t have to let you buy anything it’s up to my discretion I then called your orlando outlet and your new jersey outlet and talked to the store managers and cited your policy I was given I asked them to confirm if that was accurate and both said if it was a policy it was news to them I then asked if they would let me buy my order using 4 cards and 4 receipts the woman at orlando said oh my gosh yes we do that every single day I asked if I went to her store if I would have any trouble with this in the future and was told no then she said you can always come down here if you’re in the area and i’ll be happy to take your order after that phone call I tried again here’s the video of that attempt I said listen I have 4 credit cards your register girl said you told her she can’t ring up an order under 750 items that’s 3500 if it’s 5 items not all of my cards have that much I have done multiple receipts every time I came here heck I can even supply them to show it he tells me that because I am order so many items that I can’t have less tan 750 items per receipt so I point around to everyone else and ask what about everyone else you aren’t forcing them to spend a minimum of 750 items what about the final charge i’ll have 750 items for two tickets but the leftover isn’t going to be 750 items you’re not going to let me buy them he shrugged his shoulders to say no at this point I haven’t yelled ive been a bit snarky and sarcastic because I know he’s just giving me a hard time two people ring in our order almost every time I am up there and we were there 3 times in the last 6 months spent a bunch each time so at 730 8pm or so we are done shopping assuming that two people could ring us up ended up being a fantasy he forced one employee only to ring us up later on he comes up when its now close to 9pm and says hey you mind if we ring you up on both registers I chuckle and say no I don’t but you do you don’t want to be breaking that 750 rule do you he glared at me and then sent the employee away and walked off after blinking a few times I laugh because after telling me over and over he couldn’t do it he just got caught trying to do what should have been done to begin with a short while later after 9 I find out that everyone is standing uip front except for the one girl and another associate because none of the rest of them are allowed to help her ring us up the only two people left in the store with about 700 more items to be rang in if that’s not enough since it was a holidy all of these employees are apparently being paid overtime to stand around and wait at a bit after 10 all but two girls leave and one girl is waiting to count cash while the other girl sits and keeps ringing stuff in we apologize profusely we expected two employees to ring us up like always and timed our visit to be out around 9 if this had happened instead of having one literally stand there and watch her for 1 hour and 47 minutes after close we would have all been out on time and no overtime or extra hours spent so finally at 10 47 pm our orders are done we thank the lovely girl lauren and jasmine who got stuck staying 2 hours past close because a manager made up some random policy and had to double down when I pointed out he really needed to follow that 750 rule when he was going to toss another girl on the register if this is policy fine it doesn’t seem to be no manager at your other outlets knew what he was talking about the orlando one insisted that the only restrictions are on cash payments and verified I was paying cash or credit it’s a pretty humiliating experience to get hassled trying to buy panties and bras by someone who’s on some type of power trip the only thing I said sideways to him was that I flat out didn’t believe his policy and that credit absolutely is not the same as cash I didnt call him any names scream at him or did anything to disrupt the store beyond what you see in the videos if this is not policy i’d like an apology from that manager in person or over the phone admitting he was mistaken I would hope that the next time I go there I am not hassled but if not I guess there’s always orlando or new jersey who seem to be quite friendly I also want to give recognition to jasmine and lauren lauren is the poor soul who got stuck ringing everything in alone because of the manager’s silly rule and not allowing anyone to help because it would be in violation of the 750 item rule jasmine was the cash counter who had to wait until we were out of the store to count cash even more interesting is that I had a former employee with me helping me buy and she said she never heard of this policy either but it doesn’t mean it wasn’t added since she left she was just as confused because the manager spent over 30 minutes trying to explain and defend this when that time certainly would have been more efficiently spent doing productive things instead of hassling someone who literally sits in a corner and speaks to no one while sorting through your products one bin at a time id love a call back about this or to find out what exactly is going on ive never been hassled like this before and it was a little frustrating and very trying to keep my cool joe rossetti alexandria gunn. Placed an order back in july and earned 30 in children’s place cash that couldn’t be spent until mid september ordered 60 in september so I could use the 3 coupons not only did you drop 2 items from my order saying they were no longer available you refused to reissue my 30 in coupons after you lost my package but I didn’t learn and I ordered from you again with a 30 off coupon I just received an email stating that yet another item in my new order is no longer available let’s see if the rest of my order will arrive p s I ordered from carter’s after I ordered from you and their order has already arrived get your act together children’s place See Other related products: I Wise Woman Once Said Damn It I'm Getting A Maine Coon T-Shirt

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taexual · 6 years ago

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HOLIC - 21 | jb x reader

pairing: Im Jaebum x Reader

genre: enemies to lovers au | roommate au

warnings: angst + strong language

words: 4k

disclaimer: i do not own the gif, please let me know if it belongs to you, so i can give proper credit

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You woke up the next morning, knowing very well that the apartment was empty without having to get out of bed to check. Everything just felt different when Jaebum wasn’t here with you; emptier, even, somehow. Even if the two of you haven’t gone to sleep fighting, you still felt lonely in the apartment without him but in today’s case, your confusing exchange last night certainly made everything feel worse.

Forcing yourself out of bed – because you craved water after all the drinking last night – you checked the time on your phone and were surprised to see that it was well after ten in the morning. Since it was Sunday today, you didn’t put it past Jaebum to go out jogging early in the morning, but he should have been back by now.

Not wanting to think that he was avoiding you again – maybe staying out with his friends was starting to become like second nature to him and he was this close to actually moving out of this apartment – you focused on preparing your breakfast instead. However, you didn’t have any plans today and you could only stay focused on corn flakes for so long before you got distracted by the most useless stuff – this time, it was a new notification on your phone.

It was just a tweet that one of your favorite artists had just posted, but your heart rate already picked up. You couldn’t lie to yourself; you were absolutely hoping it was going to be a text from Jaebum but, of course, it was something else. You should have known how unlikely it was for him to text you right now.

Ever since you went out to see Jiho and ended up at Mark’s bar, Jaebum had been acting weird. Starting with his random burst of anger when you mentioned hanging out with Mark, and ending with his seemingly pointless statement about how you and Mark were “friends” last night, you were more confused than ever.

Kiera’s words from last night replayed in your head – she thought that Jaebum might have been acting weird around you because he was uncomfortable with you knowing so much about him—and his friends—and perhaps she was right – but, even though Kiera’s observations made sense 95% of the time, you had a feeling that Jaebum fell into the remaining 5% category.

You couldn’t figure him out and you were living with him – and sometimes it seemed as though Jaebum couldn’t figure his feelings out himself – so there was virtually no chance of Kiera knowing better. Then again, perhaps you’d been blinded by your constant arguments and your—as much as you hated to admit it—budding feelings for him, so you couldn’t see the situation clearly. Not to mention, you’d already come up with so many theories of why he was the way he was, it was starting to become difficult to find the real him -- the Jaebum that you were perhaps yet to fully meet.

And while it always upset you to realize that even after seeing him every day since you moved in together, you still barely knew the real him, what was truly annoying about this situation was that your job was, essentially, to capture people’s emotions. To understand them. You were a photographer – well, you wanted to be one but, clearly, it was taking some time since you haven’t been able to find the time to photograph anything lately – and you always thought you were somewhat good at reading people’s faces. And you failed profoundly when it came to recognizing what Jaebum was feeling.

It was hurtful and unfair that you had to try to hard so figure Jaebum out – while your emotions always showed on your face as clear as day – but perhaps you—and the hidden masochist inside of you—enjoyed the continuous pain he caused you by being cryptic and refusing to talk to you. Maybe just like Jaebum, who – at least, according to Suji; although God knew how much you could have trusted her words – was attracted to people who could “put him in his place” or he was going to get bored, you were also attracted—and intrigued—by the mystery surrounding your roommate.

At the end of the day, it was clear that Jaebum never let people in and you basically forced your way into his life with a damn sledgehammer. Perhaps you’d really left him no choice but to open up to you and now he was slowly distancing himself from you because he wasn’t actually ready for you to enter his life like that.

The saddest thing was, you weren’t sure if he’d ever be ready for you and you absolutely weren’t sure if falling into the mystery that was Jaebum wasn’t going to kill you.

And there went your corn flakes. You could never focus on anything else; Jaebum always lingered in your mind.

Since you assumed Jaebum was with Jackson again – therefore, it was very likely that he was recording his music – you figured you could use this alone time to catch up on your own photography that you’ve neglected because you were too busy dealing with Suji. And Jiho. And, honestly, everyone.

Because you haven’t taken any new pictures recently – for shame; you couldn’t remember the last time you’ve gone this long without photographing anything – you were stuck digging out old ones, especially the ones you’ve chosen to ignore for the time being as you weren’t able to fix the coloring in a way that you would have liked.

Having nothing better to do, you arranged yourself – and your laptop – into a comfortable position on your bed – anticipating the inevitable back pain – and then turned Photoshop on. To ensure that, this time, the thoughts about your roommate did not interrupt your semi-productive mood, you put your headphones on and started a playlist of old favorites to distract yourself from anything that was going on in your life at the moment, and to take your mind back in time instead.

The music seemed to work like a spell and you found yourself humming along as you toyed with your pictures, slowly drifting away from reality and allowing your unconscious mind to do most of the editing for you – this used to be your favorite state when you were in university; just dissociating until real-life problems called for you again.

You never liked to listen to music on full volume because you never owned headphones that wouldn’t make loud songs sound like the screeching of a pregnant cat, but today you needed to tune out the sound of your thoughts, so you were listening to music louder than usually. And that is precisely why you didn’t hear the door of the apartment close and the door of your bedroom open.

Since you weren’t expecting Jaebum to come home while you were still awake – you knew of his tendency to avoid his problems, he’s shown it to you quite a few times before – you were absolutely horrified to see him standing by your bed, watching the screen of your laptop.

Squealing in surprise, you nearly tossed your laptop at him as you threw your headphones off.

“Jesus Christ, would you knock?!” you yelled, trying to calm yourself down while Jaebum snickered – what an unexpected sound – and sat down on your bed, nodding his head in the direction of your abandoned computer.

“Did you take those?” he asked, obviously meaning the pictures you’d been editing.

You were still recovering from the shock of seeing him home but now you were left wondering what had gotten into him – after days of cryptic responses to all of your questions, he was now striking up a proper conversation with you? That boy needed help.

“I did,” you told him, keeping a wary eye on him in case he burst out again. “Why?”

“They’re beautiful,” he said, repositioning your laptop so he could see better and then, even taking it as far as using your mouse to click on a specific picture – the one that showed the reflection of the city lights on the glass of a dark window. “I like this, where did you take it?”

“My old campus,” you said, leaning in closer to him to see the picture in question. “I used to take most of my pictures there before I ran out of spots to photograph and had to look elsewhere.”

“Hmm,” he hummed, clicking through other pictures – it didn’t upset you much even if he was doing this without your permission. “Oh, this one’s good. Really good. Could you send it to me? I’d love to have it on my phone.”

Surprised – no one’s asked you to send them a picture you’ve taken if it wasn’t a picture of them – you glanced at the screen of your laptop and were confused to see one of your much earlier pictures, taken almost immediately after you bought your newest camera that you’d been using for three years now. The picture, actually, wasn’t anything special: it was a shot of your shadow—the only distinguishable shadow in the dark picture—surrounded by various darker, rectangular shadows—the buildings behind you—and a small puddle of water—reflecting the street light above—in the spot where your heart was supposed to be.

“You like it?” you asked somewhat awkwardly. Not only had he chosen a picture you took when you weren’t as confident in your photographing abilities, but it was also a picture that literally had a part of you in it.

“Yes,” Jaebum nodded. “Does it have a title?”

You pulled away from him before continuing. You never felt confident about the titles you gave your pictures – they all seemed to make no sense when you said them out loud – and you were even more insecure now that you were in the presence of someone who essentially lived on words, being a songwriter and all.

“Alive,” you ended up saying. “That’s the title I gave it when I took it in about three years ago. It sounds stupid now – why would a lonely puddle in the place of a heart symbolize someone’s life – but—”

“I think it’s beautiful,” he stopped you, zooming in on the picture. “I love the idea behind it and I think the title fits the mood of the picture, too. Will you send it to me?”

Swallowing, you decided that now was the time to confront him about what’s been going on with him these past few days.

“I will,” you promised. “If you answer one question.”

Jaebum wasn’t expecting this but he merely shrugged. “Sure. What is it?”

“What’s been going on?” you asked and, after noticing that confusion started to slowly descend upon his features, proceeded to explain, “I-I mean you’ve been really cold to me out of the blue, and I know you’re generally not a warm person — and we’re not best friends or anything – but this was, well, unusual. And I know you know what I mean because you almost told me what was wrong last night but then… you shut me out again.”

You looked away from him in the middle of your explanation, despising the neediness in your voice. If he was going to remark about how you shouldn’t have been “waiting up for him” like he’s written in his note before, you swore you were going to hurl the first heavy thing you found at him. Because you’d looked away, however, you did not see Jaebum look away from you as well – masking the guilt that flashed across his face once he heard you speak out about the way he’s treated you.

“Yeah, uh…” he started to speak and then cleared his throat, thinking of what to say next. “This obviously isn’t something I want to talk about.”

“Obviously,” you agreed, resisting the urge to roll your eyes.

“Right,” Jaebum took another long pause before finally saying, “I actually wanted to apologize about all of that. Mark – I sort of talked to him on the phone today, he’s a lot more level-headed than I am – let me know how big of an asshole I’ve been to you, so, yeah, uh… I’m sorry.”

You appreciated the apology – and made a mental note to thank Mark because, obviously, he must have found a way to subtly approach Jaebum about the issues you’ve mentioned at the bar last night – but before you could say anything, Jaebum continued.

“I don’t want to constantly complain about the same things,” he started to say and then cleared up, “not that there’s anything wrong with that, I just prefer not being a nuisance to other people—”

“You’re not a—okay, maybe you’re a little bit of a nuisance,” you said, earning a small smile from him that almost made you believe that his explanation was going to make sense and the two of you were going to move past this and return to another calm period of your lives, however short-lived it would be. “But it’s not like I’m much better. I’m fine with listening to you complain if that means you’re actually talking to me.”

After a quiet moment – God, did your words sound too much like a compliment? Should you have said something else to lower his ego? – Jaebum’s smile completely disappeared and you knew he was back to business. His serious expression unsettled you, somehow, and it felt as though you knew what he was going to talk about before he even opened his mouth. There was really only one thing that nearly ruined his life, after all – what else would he complain about continuously?

“I went through this thing with Suji,” Jaebum started, “she’d always tag along whenever I went out with my friends. She was all over them and most of them liked her because—well, you know why. She had something about her that fooled you and pulled you in. She always insisted on coming to see my friends with me, and before long, I was starting to suffocate with her everywhere. I had even asked her to stay home so I could have a guys’ night out once, and she still showed up at the club.”

You wanted to know more about his relationship with her but, at the same time, you were struggling to understand how Jaebum’s coldness to you related to his ex-girlfriend. However, after remembering everything he’s asked you – “how long have you been hanging out with Mark without me?” – you were slowly starting to see what his point was.

“Hold on for a moment,” you stopped him. “Are you—do you think I’m doing this, too? Do you think I’m trying to—I don’t know—corrupt your friends somehow, too? Steal them from you, even?”

“I—no,” he said and then sighed. “I don’t know. I just know that I’ve already been in a position where my friends had to pick sides before and I don’t want to go through that again. And, you know, I’ve already experienced someone take over my life for me. I know we talked about you dealing with Suji already but that still happened. And I-I get that our situation is different now, we moved on from that, and I moved on from Suji, but sometimes the lines blur for me.”

“The lines blur,” you repeated, your pulse quickening. “So, essentially what you’re saying is that, sometimes, you think I’m just like Suji?”

“No,” Jaebum was quick to realize how big was the pile of shit that he’s just stepped – or, flung himself – into, really. He closed his eyes for a moment, regretting opening his mouth as if staying quiet and shutting you out – as you’ve put it – would have worked out better. A minute later, he continued, “I’m just saying that I—maybe I get a little insecure about this sometimes. I talked to Mark about you today and he was the one who told me I was being unfair to you by expecting you to do the same things Suji’s done, so I realize it was wrong of me to—”

“—to compare me to your so-called psycho ex-girlfriend?” you finished for him. “Yeah, I’d say that was wrong.”

Every word he said only seemed to make this worse. Jaebum had absolutely no clue how to communicate with anyone without ruining everything, but he still tried – although he was slowly starting to forget why he even bothered.

“I’m not comparing you to her,” he said. “But you have to understand where I’m coming from. You know—better than anyone—about the kind of shit I had to experience with her, so, forgive me for being cautious so history wouldn’t repeat itself.”

“History wouldn’t—what the fuck, Jaebum?” you got up from the bed, no longer feeling comfortable sitting so close to him while he looked for parallels between you and his ex. “You didn’t know me for very long, sure, but didn’t I ever show you that I’m actually, you know, a completely different person from Suji? We’re both girls – and that’s as far as our common features go.”

“You’re—”

“I know I met up with her to get her to leave you alone, and I get that I shouldn’t have done that because it’s not my business – I’m not expecting your gratitude for that – but, shit, I didn’t do it to take over your life! I did it because I was looking out for you in whatever messed up way I could manage,” you continued, noticing how he covered his face with his hands, only getting more frustrated. “I understand your insecurities but, for fuck’s sake, have I not shown enough of my support to you? Have I not hyped your music up even though I’ve never even heard it? Have I not put up with your seemingly endless stream of one-night-stands? Did I ever lie to you about where I was and went out to hang out with your friends behind your back? Did—”

“No!” he cut you off, showing the first signs of anger, no matter how hard he’d tried to restrain himself. “You never did any of those things but how am I supposed to know you’ll never do them in the future?”

Both of your faces contorted painfully as soon as he said this – yours, because you suddenly knew just how little he trusted you; and his, because this was the exact opposite of what he should have said to you.

“Do you treat all of your friends like this?” you asked, crossing your arms over your chest when he got up from your bed as well. “Do you expect this kind of behavior from everyone? Do you immediately assume every new person you meet is going to take everything you’ve worked so hard on from you?”

“No, I—”

“Are you still waiting for me to fuck up, then?” you were shouting but it was nothing new – the two of you could never have a calm conversation – and you were sure your neighbors had already gotten used to it. “Did you tell me you forgave me for meeting up with Suji, when you actually didn’t?”

“No!” he said. “I did forgive you. I thought I did. I don’t care a-about that. I care about you.”

“You care about how similar to her I am.”

Jaebum groaned. “I care about how similar to her everyone is! And I’m not fucking waiting for you to fuck up.”

“Well, then what is it?” you questioned, your voice loud and piercing. “Why is it that you don’t assume every person you meet will ruin your life, and yet, you think I might?”

“I don’t think you—fuck, you’re important to me,” Jaebum shot back, equally as agitated. He was obviously struggling with his words. “I wouldn’t care about anything that you do if you weren’t. I’m just trying to make sure—”

“—I don’t turn out to be a psychotic bitch?” you guessed, the conclusion you’ve reached making him groan because it was mostly true – he was always making sure he didn’t end up meeting another version of Suji – but it sounded ugly when you put it like that.

“N-no, I just want to be sure I know the real you,” he said. “You can’t blame me for not trusting people easily after all of this.”

“I’m not blaming you for that,” you countered. “But why the fuck did you expect to get to know me better by not talking to me? You’re not even giving me a chance to show you that you can trust me because you distance yourself from me every time you start to have doubts about me. We don’t have mutual friends, Jaebum, we’re still virtually strangers – so who the fuck is going to clear these doubts for you if you won’t let me do it?”

“I… I don’t—”

“It sounds to me like you just want to escape me and you’ll take any chance you get to do just that,” you said, your heart slamming right into the sharp edge of your ribcage until you nearly doubled over in pain. It was true, you weren’t just paranoid. Jaebum was indeed trying to get out of the cage your close presence had put him in. “Every time I do something wrong – even if I don’t realize it – you disappear on me as if I’ve cursed your ancestors by making a mistake. I’m not perfect. If anything, I’m the furthest thing from it, but you have to let people make mistakes and believe that they won’t ruin your life, Jaebum. You have to let people apologize for them, too. And if you don’t think you’ll have it in yourself to forgive them, then tell them that and let go of them. Tell me to leave if I fucked up so bad that you think I’m exactly like Suji—”

“Did I say you were exactly like her?” he was frantic now as the fight progressed into something that no longer involved just the past couple of days, but also covered the entirety of your relationship with each other. “Or did I ever say I wanted you to leave? Fuck, I’m spending almost every moment of my free time at home just so I could spend more time with you — and I don’t fucking do that. I go out, okay? I like to have fun, I like to drink, and I like to be out when it’s dark – whatever. I don’t do that as much anymore.”

“Oh, well, thank you so much for making these sacrifices for me.”

The sarcasm in your voice made him want to punch the closest wall.

“Those are not—I can’t—you’re not fucking hearing me,” he stumbled around different arguments. “I’m telling you about all the shit I do for you – the shit I’d never done for anyone else before – just to prove that I don’t think you’re like Suji in any way.”

“Well, then why the silence?” you countered. “Why did you not talk to me about what you were feeling?”

“I didn’t know how to put it in words so it’d make sense,” he said. “Clearly, I still don’t understand any of this myself. A part of me might never be able to fully open up to anyone and, fuck, I sure as hell don’t want my past relationship to influence my decisions about my future but it does, okay? I am going to be paranoid and I can’t fucking help it.”

“Do you think that’s fair to others? To me?” you asked, shaking your head. “You’re not even giving me a chance.”

“I’m not—chance after chance is exactly what I’m giving you!” Jaebum protested. “And that’s why I’m scared. That’s exactly why I’m fucking terrified – because, suddenly, I don’t care about anything that you’re doing. I’m fine with all of it. I forgive you for everything and I open up to you about everything without sitting down to think if that’s the right thing to do. And then, the next second, I’m hating myself because, fuck, why am I even doubting this? I have every right to tell you shit about myself. I have every right to forgive you because, technically, you didn’t do anything wrong. But, then, how could I not doubt this? I’ve already been through something similar, I don’t want to go through that again. I’ve already experienced a period of my life where I forgave everything. Where I opened up about everything.”

“Alright,” you said, your lips forming a straight line. You knew the words he said had a different meaning – he wasn’t trying to hurt you – and yet each sentence that left his lips seemed to dig painfully into your chest. “You are making sure I’m not Suji 2.0. That’s fine.”

“That’s not fine,” he voiced the obvious. “And I get that it sounds bad but it’s—fuck, I’m being really fucking open with you here – I literally don’t know how to deal with myself. If I get the feeling like I’m about to get burned, I-I pull away because I’ve been there before. I can’t keep on trying to calm myself down and ignore the bad feelings in my stomach because I know those bad feelings can turn into a bad reality. That’s how I fucking deal with my problems – I leave. I can’t cling onto something that will potentially rip my heart out and force me to swallow it raw.”

You hated how deep the argument had gotten. You had not prepared to pour your entire soul into this and Jaebum hadn’t either – that’s why he looked almost nauseous – but there was no going back now.

“And you think I could do that to you?” you asked.

He looked down. “I don’t know.”

“Alright,” you said, your voice calm all of a sudden. You wanted this conversation to end now. “I appreciate you telling me this.”

Immediately understanding that you were done, Jaebum tried to find one last way to magically mend the scars on both of your throats after you’ve yelled at each other. “Fuck, I’m—”

“Look, maybe we should be alone for a while,” you cut him off, not wanting to hear him say anything else because you could only shout so much before tears finally showed up. “I don’t want to deal with this and, obviously, neither one of us can think clearly right now. Maybe we can just ignore this conversation like you’ve been trying to do before I brought it up.”

His hands were on his face again as he tried one last time, “I’m sorry.”

You swallowed thickly – the lump in your throat letting you know that you were either about to suffocate or cry, and you didn’t know which one you’d have preferred.

“Okay,” you said, turning away from him in case tears appeared in your eyes before he left. “Thank you. I’m sorry, too.”

Jaebum wasn’t sure what to do. He wasn’t sure where the two of you were standing – he’s revealed so much of himself to you in the past ten minutes and he knew he’s never been this honest about his feelings with anyone before – and he knew now wasn’t the time to ask.

If he could turn back the time, he’d change the sequence of his words to you – first, he’d tell you how much you mattered to him and how much he loved being with you, and only then would he mention how hard it was for him to be around you. How afraid he was to open his heart up – how much he resisted it, even – and how easily he allowed his feelings to defeat him, in the end.

He was getting more and more scared by the second because what if he ended up getting himself into something he could not get out of? What if he’d start something he’d never be able to end again? Even if these fears sounded irrational – even more so after he saw how wildly you tried to get him to see that you hated being compared to Suji – he still couldn’t escape them. And he was afraid he never would.

Jaebum didn’t wish to take his words back. He’d said all that he’d been dying to say to you for the past few days. He just wished the two of you lived in a world where the past could have been left in the past and all the words spoken in the present – and all the confessions hiding underneath those anguished tones and desperate eyes – were all that remained between you and him.

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breakingmllc · 5 years ago

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Bear Oh Look It's Beer O'clock Vintage Retro

Hello customer service are you there I spent a Bear Oh Look It's Beer O'clock Vintage Retro lot of money on make up and beauty products and instead received diapers and baby wipes in the mail i’ve waited hours on the phone and i’ve sent multiple emails to you I sent a facebook message this morning and no response disappointing. Show thakoon nyc aw15 lead diane kendal for nars cosmetics look inspired by the northern lights thakoon wanted the girls to look beautiful keeping the ideal of lights and reflection. So this is going to be a bit long but bear with me I had what I believe to be a pointless and incredibly frustrating experience with the assistant manager jamie at your auburn hills great lakes crossing location today I have been coming here for three years I frequent your orlando san marcos and new jersey locations as well at least once a year when we stop we usually spend 5 to 10 thousand dollars on your products the system is simple I go in park in a corner and bring bins to my corner sort them bag them move them to the front register and repeat today I brought a personal duffel bag as it holds about 8 to 12 of your bags worth of stuff I get told that i’m not allowed to use it because it’s policy not a big deal at all I say okay i’ll do that for the rest rather than rebag all of this i’ll just go up in line and pay for it and it can sit behind the counter seems pretty reasonable to me nope I got obstructed suggested that I might be stealing something and not allowed to pass stating if I don’t want to follow the system I can leave he then takes my entire duffel dumps it onto the floor and then rebags it into victoria secret bags then moves it to the front counter so it can be rang in I thought this was a little odd but hey he was doing all the work rebagging it so whatever i’m like dude i’m going to be spending about 8k today all I want to do is come in spend some money get out without any drama what’s the problem whoevers in charge should be thrilled with a sale like this we’re spending 8k keep in mind that I told him that I would do what he wanted and it wasnt’ a big deal and the response was to the effect of stop being lippy and just listen I told him what do you want from me I just agreed with you and said I would use your bags i’m not being lippy at all I know this because I said okay dude not a problem i’ll use your bags his response was maybe if you get to buy it i’m like what are you suggesting that an 8 000 order is something you guys don’t want he’s like yeah if you buy it i’m like dude we are spending 8k today why would I bag up a bunch of stuff and spend 2 3 hours picking our your fabulous product to not buy it anyway so I had 4 credit cards one card had 2 000 one had 3500 one had 2000 and one had 1000 because I am buying for multiple people I had 4 different cards all in my name I wanted one receipt for each card not a big deal to me right wrong again he cited some policy and said if the order is more than 750 items that they aren’t allowed to ring in under 750 items on any one receipt id like to point out that that amount is higher than your employees said they could take as a cash payment I asked him to please show me that I would understand better if I could just read it he was willing to do so he brought out the policy book and to my surprise what it actually said was words to the afffect of cash payments cannot be split up or over 750 items I forget the second half my immediate reply was so what’s the big deal im using credit not cash he snatched the policy book away from me at that point and said you know what you can just listen to me or I don’t have to let you buy anything it’s up to my discretion I then called your orlando outlet and your new jersey outlet and talked to the store managers and cited your policy I was given I asked them to confirm if that was accurate and both said if it was a policy it was news to them I then asked if they would let me buy my order using 4 cards and 4 receipts the woman at orlando said oh my gosh yes we do that every single day I asked if I went to her store if I would have any trouble with this in the future and was told no then she said you can always come down here if you’re in the area and i’ll be happy to take your order after that phone call I tried again here’s the video of that attempt I said listen I have 4 credit cards your register girl said you told her she can’t ring up an order under 750 items that’s 3500 if it’s 5 items not all of my cards have that much I have done multiple receipts every time I came here heck I can even supply them to show it he tells me that because I am order so many items that I can’t have less tan 750 items per receipt so I point around to everyone else and ask what about everyone else you aren’t forcing them to spend a minimum of 750 items what about the final charge i’ll have 750 items for two tickets but the leftover isn’t going to be 750 items you’re not going to let me buy them he shrugged his shoulders to say no at this point I haven’t yelled ive been a bit snarky and sarcastic because I know he’s just giving me a hard time two people ring in our order almost every time I am up there and we were there 3 times in the last 6 months spent a bunch each time so at 730 8pm or so we are done shopping assuming that two people could ring us up ended up being a fantasy he forced one employee only to ring us up later on he comes up when its now close to 9pm and says hey you mind if we ring you up on both registers I chuckle and say no I don’t but you do you don’t want to be breaking that 750 rule do you he glared at me and then sent the employee away and walked off after blinking a few times I laugh because after telling me over and over he couldn’t do it he just got caught trying to do what should have been done to begin with a short while later after 9 I find out that everyone is standing uip front except for the one girl and another associate because none of the rest of them are allowed to help her ring us up the only two people left in the store with about 700 more items to be rang in if that’s not enough since it was a holidy all of these employees are apparently being paid overtime to stand around and wait at a bit after 10 all but two girls leave and one girl is waiting to count cash while the other girl sits and keeps ringing stuff in we apologize profusely we expected two employees to ring us up like always and timed our visit to be out around 9 if this had happened instead of having one literally stand there and watch her for 1 hour and 47 minutes after close we would have all been out on time and no overtime or extra hours spent so finally at 10 47 pm our orders are done we thank the lovely girl lauren and jasmine who got stuck staying 2 hours past close because a manager made up some random policy and had to double down when I pointed out he really needed to follow that 750 rule when he was going to toss another girl on the register if this is policy fine it doesn’t seem to be no manager at your other outlets knew what he was talking about the orlando one insisted that the only restrictions are on cash payments and verified I was paying cash or credit it’s a pretty humiliating experience to get hassled trying to buy panties and bras by someone who’s on some type of power trip the only thing I said sideways to him was that I flat out didn’t believe his policy and that credit absolutely is not the same as cash I didnt call him any names scream at him or did anything to disrupt the store beyond what you see in the videos if this is not policy i’d like an apology from that manager in person or over the phone admitting he was mistaken I would hope that the next time I go there I am not hassled but if not I guess there’s always orlando or new jersey who seem to be quite friendly I also want to give recognition to jasmine and lauren lauren is the poor soul who got stuck ringing everything in alone because of the manager’s silly rule and not allowing anyone to help because it would be in violation of the 750 item rule jasmine was the cash counter who had to wait until we were out of the store to count cash even more interesting is that I had a former employee with me helping me buy and she said she never heard of this policy either but it doesn’t mean it wasn’t added since she left she was just as confused because the manager spent over 30 minutes trying to explain and defend this when that time certainly would have been more efficiently spent doing productive things instead of hassling someone who literally sits in a corner and speaks to no one while sorting through your products one bin at a time id love a call back about this or to find out what exactly is going on ive never been hassled like this before and it was a little frustrating and very trying to keep my cool joe rossetti alexandria gunn

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livinlavidafandoms · 8 years ago

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ACOWAR and whole series chant and rant(spoilers ahead)

Well this is the first time i actually do this, some sort of review, but the last two months I’ve been reading the whole A Court of thorns and roses series and i have to say my feelings are very very mixed.So here I go

ACOTAR : I kinda enjoyed this one , it certainly got me into the whole Prynthian world and it’s aesthetics, the fact that Feyre is the Katniss of the first book bugged me a little , but not so much to distract me from the plot.What bugged me enough to distract me was the attitude her sisters had , especially Nesta, despite paying of well in the end of the series Nesta in the beginning was a pure prick,arrogant and completely pointless for me to be made that way.Of course you’ll say ‘’character development’’ and its the only thing ill keep of it but still it annoys me to the core that Feyre was responsible for everyone to be fed and taken care of.Afterwards , where Tamlin and Lucien got into the plot ,it gave me the vibe of Beauty and the Beast. A curse had to be broken for Tamlin and that curse, a part of it , included the true love and blah blah blah.Mesmerizing though was the description of the court, its festivities and the Way Tamlin treated of Feyre despite how the books try to change that.I myself do not so much like Tamlin but I can certainly give it to him that he was poorly treated.Then again at the end of the book the casual danger appears, Amarantha , a cruel figure to me , but still made Feyre’s trial really agonizing and wanting to see the outcome was the only reason i did not give up the book.Then again our opinion towards the prick called Rhysand changes ,which is somehow great , and everyone understands why during the next book , however, by the end of thebook with Amarantha being destroyed was very predictable. I would have chosen her staying alive and being allies with Hybern , something ill elaborate on later.

ACOMAF: Whoah, this book really got me awed.I would have dropped the series had i not read the goodreads comments urging me to read it.Anyways to pick first things first. We had reached a point where we all liked tamlin and now you have a tamlin who treats Feyre like a maiden quickly to be wed.I despised to whole plot with Ianthe and how she did everything.The only thing ill keep is the sex scenes with Tamlin to this and the previous book , which are enjoyable compared to the ones with Rhysand.But ill get to that. Then again I felt bored again but Rhysand popped and saved the day.The whole respect he gave her and the freedom shows such contrast with Tamlin that I myself not until then realised. J Maas has done an incredibly majestic work with the aesthetics , the night court , the descriptions ,i dont know what to mention first.The night court?the illyrians? the bond between Rhysand’s friends? their backrounds? Velarys? the mate revelation?THAT was something i really did not see coming.The whole book built up this ship brick by brick , and by the moment they reveal their love you finally say YES! even more unexpectable was the way Hybern and the cauldron made appearance , Feyre’s sisters being captives and then changed to Faery had me like : :O ! I did not expect that either.Generally this book was very verygood , with more character development , more scenery and a really good plot that makes you wonder by the end of it : what did i just read.

ACOWAR: Up to this point after finishing acomaf i had really high hopes for this one and my hopes in the end fell and crumbled quicker than the wall.First of all what made me flinch in the previous book and in this one is any sex scene of Feysand. In huge contrast to tamlin , which those scenes where much calmer and easily readable , The Feysand sex scenes were a huge and long read , pages devoted to how these to mated , full of unnecessary details ,that had me thinking : this is not Fifty Shades. There was a war going on and it really annoyed me how Rhysand kept making sex jokes and those two kept teasing each other.Apart from that , for me it was like i was reading through an entirely different Feyre. She was bragging a lot about being a high lady , already using her power Rhysand gave her , which is good , they make a great power couple , but yet, it makes me feel like that’s not the Feyre we’ve been reading about for two books now. What really awed me in a good way was the character development for Nesta and Lucien . Apart from that i really think the first part of the book in which Feyre played the spy under Tamlin’s nose , to me was just a fill up of pages.To keep going i found really important for the plot the interaction with the other courts , again the aesthetics they give off to me its the only reason this book series deserves to be on screen. Apart from that the whole world crumbling , Hybern having a massive army and finally tearing down the wall , and yet J Maas choses to devote pages and pages on 1) Feysand scenes 2)telling us how strong the mating bond is 3)just playing our feelings towards Tamlin ( i do understand him if he doesnt want to see Feyre again but not for Lucien.). Anyway, moving on to the war , in which many and many and many pages are devoted to it , the troops , the camp , it truly built up the moment against Hybern . I was pleasantly surprised to see the two Archeron girls defeating Hybern , and made a great deal their father being killed.They actually had a loss to mourn over.One thing that could have made the scenes much better for me would be if Amarantha had lived and just imagine Hybern’s madness mixed with her cruelty , it would make the war much much more dramatic and surely with more losses. Which is wha i really wanted to happen and did not ( I should mention here that I am a fan of losses and deaths because they strenghten the characters of the living ones and it makes it look realistic , that actually during a war there are losses and amongst them could be our favorite faces.) The war with Hybern did not actually leave a loss for us to be sad about , and what actually annoyed me is that, in comparison with the first book finale where Feyre was dying it kept is saying NOOOOO , it was real and her outcome,being a faerie was not expected (at least for me). Now we have Amren in the fear of loosing everything she remembers of, Azriel and Cassian shattered and Rhysand almost to die. And yet they all come back , everything is fine and happily every after.On the one hand I dont get it , it was war , there had to be losses , people to be remembered , people for whom a treaty between prynthians and humans should be honored for.But on the other hand its fiction , people, i put myself in too, read this to get away from reality , and J Maas gives us a perfect scenery in this series , and when you want to just relax and read , who would want to read about deaths?

To conclude in this long review, amongst these books I’d gladly read again the second one , of course I’ll want for J maas to tell us more about what happened to all these characters years after,I’ll give it a 3/5 , questioning very much the third book.This series truly deserves to be on screen mainly because I think with the right production the world will come to love it , and especially because the whole court aesthetics, the outfits , the cities , but also our extremely beautiful characters , are majestic pieces that definitely deserve to be made to a series (or films)

PS: If you have read till this point I thank you very very much for doing so , and Im open to suggestions for more reviews (it is a new thing I’ll try for this blog)

PS2: J Maas if you ever read this , please make a happy ending for Tamlin too.I think he might deserve it.

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captain-unlikelynutbouquet-blog · 7 years ago

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