#this my first time drawing dis dude and it had to be in the most unserious way possible

[xbimbogutzzx]

@salandersan and @xbonecandyx gave me ideas,,,,

Law belongs to gatobob

[denwritesandcries]

Like a Movie Scene – V.P

Pairing: van palmer x fem!reader

Summary: Van Palmer should come with a warning sign. She invades your life with her crooked smiles and stupid jokes and draws you into her orbit without even asking for permission, as if it were something destined to happen. Which, you assume, it probably is.

Word count: 7,1k.

Content: No crash!AU, cursing, mentions of homophobia (it’s the 90’s), friends to lovers, slow burn, fluff, a little angst, shitty families, LOTS of movie references, the yjs being normal teenagers.

Note: Van is a flirty little shit but also a complete loser and we love her for that.

English is not my first language.

Van Palmer should come with a warning sign or at least a 'no returns' marked on the tag of her football jerseys.

You don't think it would have done any good, though. Van draws you into her orbit from the first moment you met, like a bright and warm sun; allowing you to exist steadily in her life even though, technically, she has invaded yours.

You suppose then, that you wouldn't have it any other way.

It's likely you guys would never have really spoken to each other if it weren't for a mix-up between your practice schedules and a stupid argument between your coaches.

You see, the track team – which you were part of – always had practice right after the football team, because Wiskayok High School barely had the structure to keep both a girls and boys football team running properly, let alone a decent space for the few other sports the small-town school offered. Your practices took place on the same days of the week and one after the other, always at the same time. It was the implicit rule: from 4:30 pm the field is yours.

Coach Martínez didn't seem to care, however, because there he was arguing with your coach. Since apparently football practice had run late and the girls just needed to train for an hour and a half.

Your coach wasn't having any of it – your time was already too short without these changes –, and now both men were in the middle of the field screaming in each other's faces while poor coach Scott tried to calm them down.

“Dude.” you recognize Natalie Scatorccio’s tired and rasp voice beside you: “They could just cancel and let us go.”

You and apparently most people there, if the expressions of annoyance and crossed arms were any indication, couldn't agree more.

"Right?" You said. “Look at them, you think they’re gonna fight?”

Nat let out an amused snort, “They’re going to eat Coach Ben alive, that’s what they’re gonna do.”

You would have said something else if it weren't for a third voice coming from right behind you:

“They're gonna kiss, look how close their faces are.” It was Van Palmer, the goalie, with red hair swinging in a ponytail and a smirk on her lips. She shook her head in mock disappointment and crossed her arms, pointing with her chin at the scene, “In front of us, kids? What a lack of professionalism.”

You choke on a laugh and her gaze snaps to you, her smile widening with something like satisfaction in her eyes. The attention made you nervous. You weren't used to interacting with Yellowjackets members other than Nat, who was easy to talk to and was your lab partner as well as sharing cigarettes at parties, meaning that talking to Van Palmer was a completely new territory.

You joke back insecurely: “At least you have real coaches. Ours is the art teacher.”

That made her let out an incredulous laugh and you'd be lying if you said you didn't feel pleased about it. Like almost the entire school, you also had a crush on the Yellowjackets.

Your laughter died down just as Coach Scott ran across the field to the two mixed teams with the most genuine expression of exhaustion you've ever seen. “We decided to share the space," he says. And that's all. Your first interaction with Van: a conversation that lasted less than three minutes mocking your teachers. You would never expect it to evolve into anything beyond that.

It's strange trying to do your usual routine of running through the poorly painted banners around the pitch – which looked like it had never seen better days – with a game taking place just a few meters away from you and your teammates. The fear of getting hit in the face by a ball was embarrassing.

Yet, as you wait for the relay, your gaze tracks the girls in action. You don't know the names of most of them, but recognize Taissa and Shauna fighting over the ball at one end of the field, the confrontation seems a little too intense, which makes you a bit nervous and your eyes go straight to the nearest goal, coincidentally, is the one Van is defending.

You notice how beautiful she looks with her expression completely concentrated and hands resting on the knees, waiting to act. Shauna overtakes Taissa and kicks hard the ball towards the goal; Van grabs it as soon as she crosses the white line on the lawn.

A giggle escapes you as Shauna turns around in frustration and the ball bounces back into the field and Van and Tai share a wry smile. The goalie turns her attention away from the game for a moment to look around and you swear she's looking for something – or someone.

Your teacher calls signaling your turn and you leave your thoughts while you line up with some other teammates.

You can do your relay routine for exactly fifteen minutes before something goes wrong.

You run on autopilot, so used to it that it's practically a second nature, letting your gaze return to scanning the field with interest when one of the players tries to score again and Van throws herself against the ground to catch the ball with a stronger and clearly exaggerated movement compared to last time. You thought this would be a one-time thing, seeing as the way Jackie and Nat rolled their eyes at her from where they were off to the side blocking other girls, but it kept happening the entire time you spent running until it was time for your break.

You choke on the water you drink when you realize that Van is the one staring at you this time, hands resting on her thighs, face sweaty and red, as if she doesn't have a game to focus on.

Shit, you think. How are you going to keep your head in training now? You wonder what you would have done to get a Yellowjacket's attention so suddenly as you return to your line.

You resume your run at a pretty good pace despite the sudden nervousness, feeling a little more confident when you hear a loud “Come on guys, no one has beaten L/N’s time yet!” coming from your teacher.

And then you're approaching the curve flush with the football field, the curve that gives you the perfect view of the goal.

Van is there, of course, just throwing the ball downfield again. Van, who rests her hands on her hips and catches her breath when Coach Scott blows the whistle and tells that her team won the game. Van, who turns around just in time and sees you approaching. Van, who removes a strand of red hair from her face that has escaped the ponytail and gives you a malicious toothy smile. Van, who winks at you. Van, who makes you fall. Literally.

It's all so out of nowhere, so suddenly that your heart misses a beat and you miss a step, tripping over your own feet as if your legs forgot how to work properly, falling in the middle of the curve and getting in the way of your colleagues further back in the lanes next to your side

Shit. Holyshit. Fuck. You just fell in front of the entire football team.

One of your friends bends down next to you to help and asks what happened, you blame the laces of your sneakers that untied when you fell because any reason is less embarrassing than what actually happened.

Your knee is bleeding and one of your arms is scraped, so the coach decides to have pity and leave you on the bench until it's time to leave. You make your way there with your ears burning and your head down.

If Van had any kind of interest in you, it definitely disappeared after that.

You remain alone on the bench, avoiding looking anywhere for a long time until Misty Quigley appears at your side with things to bandage your wound and you happily let her fill the silence with whatever she wants to say for the next few minutes.

Your night is spent tossing and turning in bed over the shame you've experienced and the next day as you walk through the hallways, the possibility of the goalie talking to you again doesn't even cross your mind as the first classes go by like a blur.

And then you're at your lunch table waiting for Nat to show up to talk like she usually does when she doesn't disappear around school, but after a few minutes a head of red hair takes over your vision instead of the usual dyed blonde.

“What’s up?” Van is sitting next to you, with the same crooked smile and her cheek propped up in a fist.

“Uh, nothing much really.” You have no idea what is going on; she is sitting with you, smiling at you and talking to you. Why is she doing this? You can feel a few other people's eyes on you through the interaction.

She introduces herself, even though you already know who she is, holding out a hand for you to shake – they’re rough, you notice, with calluses adorning the fingers –, probably just so you can introduce yourself too. “I’m Van,” she says. And that’s it.

She’s been Van since the beginning. Not Vanessa Palmer or the Yellowjackets goalkeeper, just Van. She says it so matter-of-factly that it would simply sound wrong to call her anything else.

You engage in a conversation about anything and everything after you introduce yourself – just your nickname too. You assume Nat already told her your name at some point yesterday – speaking as if you already knew each other, and somehow it doesn't feel weird.

Your eyes end up focusing on a black-haired girl crying at a table on the other side of the cafeteria with another girl a little smaller than her. You don't know either of them, but you know that they are both on the main team too.

“Hey,” you point with your chin: “What’s up with her?”

Van finds the source of your attention and raises her eyebrows, “Oh, you mean Mari?”

You answer with a simple nod of your head and that's enough for Van to invade your personal space with a devilish expression and a mischievous smile.

“She had a bad break up.” Van says and you tilt your head at her.

“But was it that bad?” You arch an eyebrow, “People don’t cry in such full places over nothing.”

Van moves a little closer to you and lowers her voice conspiratorially, as if she’s telling you a very important secret: “She were dumped," and then a dramatic pause, “For the guy’s half-sister.”

"What?" Your jaw drops completely and Van nods her head.

“Lottie told me, she knows about these things.” Ahe rests her face in her hand again, “She said she caught them kissing at her last party, Mari must have known.”

“‘The fuck?” The shocked look you give her only seems to amuse her.

“Oh, she's crying right now but boy, she was mad as hell in our math class today.” Van blows an exaggerated raspberry, “I bet she'll end up coming up with an absurd plan to get revenge and burn down his house just like in She Devil if the story spread.”

It will definitely spread, you thought.

An unexpected giggle escaped your chest – you might have felt a little bad for talking shit about a girl you didn't even know later, but not now – and your gaze found Van's face again.

“Yeah.” You start, “Except she was replaced by the guy’s own sister– half-sister, whatever, instead of a famous writer.”

Her face lights up completely as she speaks, bright green eyes like those of an excited puppy.

“You like that movie?” She asks.

“I love that movie,” you correct, “It’s iconic and Meryl Streep looks good.”

"She does.”

This seems to completely cement Van's interest in you, because she continues to sit with you at lunch for the rest of the week. When Nat finally shows up, she arches an eyebrow, but doesn't question it.

You and Van get closer in a surprisingly short period of time, but the way she seems to settle into your life is gradual and your silly little crush on the goalie seems to get stronger without even realizing it. Waiting for your lunches in the cafeteria, conversations in the hallways, glances exchanged during physics class – since you sat too far away to really talk – and the exchange of silly words about movies you like.

You have the habit of going out for a run every weekend in the morning – it's not easy to keep the best time in the routines, after all – and one day you decide to change your route by pure coincidence to a longer one that ends up near one of the trailer parks in the city; the fact that Nat mentioned one day that she’s neighbors with a certain teammate has nothing to do with it.

It surprises you that Van is awake at 8 am on a Saturday, but you find her – by pure coincidence, nothing more than that – outside a sad trailer watering an even sadder small garden. When she sees you, your hair is a mess and breathing is a little out of step, and you give her an awkward wave as you catch your breath. It's the first time you've seen each other outside of school.

“You’re stalking me now, weirdo?” Her crooked smile tells you that there's no real bite behind it.

"No," You place your hands on your hips, kicking some loose pebbles on the floor with your sneakers. Yes, you liar, “I always run around here, how come we’ve never seen each other before?”

Fuck it, you think. If Van can just show up for you because she wants to, then you can do the same.

She seems happy to abandon her garden chores when you ask her to go for a walk and she agrees to make you company once there’s no running involved; a walk, because no one deserves to be running around like Rocky Balboa at this time of the morning.

You walk together side by side through the neighborhood with your shoulders brushing against each other as if you've done this many times before, Van whistling a random tune carelessly.

Talking to her when the initial nervousness passes is one of the easiest things you've ever done and you find yourself enjoying and listening to everything Van tells you. This potential friendship – maybe more. Maybe, just maybe – it's the most fun thing that's happened in your year so far.

Your walks together also become a habit after that. You just come back the next day and Van is there with a smile on her face, so you keep coming back and she keeps smiling.

You also start walking home after school. Neither of you have a car, so why not?

You crave her company and she craves yours, you stay for Van's training and she stays for yours – no one else on the teams has the energy to complain about exaggerated movements or stumbles on tracks – and then when you're ready, you head off to your ways together and it makes your heart warm every time.

Everything about Van just makes you want to know her even more; the way she gestures with her arms and declares with the utmost disgust how she keeps distance from any musical that isn’t animated – “But you only watched Cats!” “And that was enough!” –, they way she tells you about how she and Taissa are watching Sabrina the Teenage Witch every Friday, or how she makes fun of any weird thing Misty said during practice that week.

You listen and absorb everything with an stupid drunk smile on your face, letting her entwine your arms and chatter to her heart's content.

Keep talking, you want to say. I love your voice, seeing you happy makes me happy. Keep talking, keep talking, keep talking.

You invite her to your house for the first time under the pretext of studying, after she throws herself on the chair next to you with a tearful expression during physics class.

“I’m gonna fail,” she whines, banging her head dramatically against the open notebook on the table, “The teacher hates me.”

You start teasingly: “Maybe he would hate you a little less if you actually paid attention in his class.”

"I do!" Van protests. “It’s personal, he must think I’m strange or somethin’ and lower my grades for it.” She crosses her arms with a pout and a roll of eyes.

“Of course." You agree with an exaggerated nod, “And you, yourself, are strange and unusual.”

“Yes!” She exclaims, ignoring the looks she attracts, “But that’s not the point, don’t quote Beetlejuice to me now, woman, this is serious.”

“Oh, wow, okay then.” You shrug.

Van looks at you before resting her head on the table again. She seems so hopeless that you give in.

“Hey, c’mon,” you say, letting your hand rest on her hair and stroke it gently: “You can come to my house today. I’ll help you study for the next test.”

Van's shoulders tense suddenly and her head snaps up so fast it makes you jump back.

"Really?" Her eyes are wide, face as red as her hair: “I wouldn’t want to bother you.”

That's strange. Van is usually the one who makes you nervous, not the other way around.

“You won’t bother me at all,” you reply without giving it much thought, “There won’t be anyone at home anyway.”

And then there's silence, Van's face turns impossibly redder and after a second of confusion, you understand.

You just invited Van to your house. Alone. There is an innuendo there. Several possibilities that neither of you will mention, but that you both know are there.

Your face starts to heat up, so you clear your throat and stutter a confused “Are you coming then?”, because you can't let her realize what you just thought about.

Van responds with a squeaky “Okay, sure." and hurries back to her usual seat when class finally begins.

When you adjust yourself in the chair and think about finally releasing the breath you didn't realize you were holding, your gaze finds Lottie Matthews staring at you three seats away with her eyebrows raised. Shit.

Lottie says nothing, just wrinkles her nose contemplatively and faces forward, but she knows. She always knows. You feel your hands sweat and shake with nervousness at the prospect of becoming the new school gossip like Mari last month. The queer who fell too hard for a Yellowjacket only to get it wrong and ruin everything.

You shake your head. No, Lottie wouldn't do that. You weren't exactly friends, but she’s not mean, there was no reason for her to mess with you, your thoughts were just talking too loud. Plus, it's not like she actually saw anything. You didn't do anything forbidden. Friends go to each other's houses all the time. Your crush is not obvious.

That's stupid, you think, it doesn't matter. But you don't really believe it. Yes, it matters, at least in this little town at the end of the world.

You just hope you don't end up crying in the cafeteria too.

There is no training that day, so as soon as classes are over, you leave school together and make your way home. For the first time, the silence is awkward and makes you feel bad for making the invitation the wrong way. Maybe Van just doesn't swing that way and you made her uncomfortable somehow. It's a possibility; you're not exactly in the closet to the rest of the school.

Still, the way her hand brushes against yours gives you hope that this isn't the case.

When Van enters your house, the first thing she does is look around.

“Wow,” she begins. “Its really…”

“Small?” You complete, feeling somewhat conscious. Your house wasn't a trailer, but it wasn't anything compared to the houses of Van's cool friends. Definitely nothing like Lottie or Jackie.

“Empty.” She corrects.

Huh. It's true, your house was praticly always empty, not only because your parents spent as much time as they could out of it, pretending they didn't have a kid to still take care of, but also because of the lack of furniture and personality. It didn't seem like a cozy place to a family live. As a whole, it could be really lonely most of the time. Van seems to have noticed this with a single glance.

You choose to ignore the comment, suddenly thinking that this might end up becoming too intimate. In a vulnerable way.

When Van enters your bedroom for the first time, she gives the place the same curious look as the rest of the house, but her jaw quickly drops.

“You got a TV in your room?” She sounds completely shocked.

“Yeah.” You snort in amusement, “My uncle runs an appliance store, he fixed one that no one picked up last summer, so now it’s mine.”

Van still looks very impressed as her eyes roam the rest of the room. Your bedroom was, perhaps, the only place in the house where someone actually seemed to live. Posters and photos adorned the colorful walls and it seemed like every little thing in the room was directly a part of you, from an old stuffed animal on one of the shelves to the small pile of messy clothes on the chair next to the study table because you weren't planning on receiving no one to remember to put it away.

The tension from before seems to be dissipating and you can see from the expression on her face the exact moment Van notices your small VHS collection up ahead.

“Okay. That's it. We're only hanging out here from now.”

And that awkward moment passes completely.

In a matter of minutes you both are comfortable in your bed with books and notebooks spread around, after convincing Van to start studying with the promise that she could choose whatever movie she wanted for you to watch when you were finished.

Van seems to dedicate herself twice as much, eager to fulfill the agreement and the hours pass quickly as she understands the concepts you explain about the subject and then all you have to do is say that it's time for a break for her to jump out of bed with a smile from ear to ear and choose a movie.

She puffs out her chest holding the tape in her hands and proudly declares that you're watching Jurassic Park and you don't even think to question it when you return the smile and takes on the task of making popcorn.

Van ends up leaning against you throughout the movie, reciting all the lines from memory along with the characters close to your ear – she knows all of them – and your heart remains racing with blood rushing in your ears until she leaves.

The two of you keep hanging out at your house again and again, just like she said it would be. Sometimes you study or watch something together, but most of the time Van simply keeps you company while you do your chores around the house, following you around like a puppy while you cook or do the laundry. Your home has never been so fulled or welcoming.

You go home after classes and practice – occasionally with Nat in tow – and stay together until it's late and dark, every now and then you say that she could just sleep over as a joke, but she never accepts it. You gulps the pang of sadness and rejection each time it happens.

And you guys talk a lot. You've never been so delighted to hear someone blab about anything.

Van spends days talking about how excited she is for summer while helping you chop the things for dinner. She and Natalie always get jobs together and she’s dying to buy a car – “You’re the runner here, lady, not me.” –, an old dark green pickup truck. She shows you the leaflet with a smile so proud that you don't have the courage to admit that you thought the thing was horrible; she tells you about how she wears the clothes of her older brother who apparently left town as soon as he finished school while helping you fold the freshly washed clothes, some of her own included.

It's so domestic that you wonder why this didn't happen sooner, depriving either of you of a routine together like this for so long seemed mean.

One night you’re sleeping soundly when you are startled awake by a loud knock on your window and you turn to find a face pressed against the glass. You almost have a heart attack.

“Jesus fucking Christ, Van!”

She's standing there with a pout and big eyes, pointing at the lock and you consider leaving her outside for the fright she got you. One look at the alarm clock on the table next to the bed tells you that it's already past 2:00 am.

“What are you doing here?” You ask, your voice rasp and tired from sleep, letting her come in, but only because you don't want her to get a cold outside.

Van sneaks into the room, suddenly shy, playing with the hem of the oversized t-shirt she's wearing and avoiding your eyes. She gives you an awkward smile.

“I was just wondering if we could have that sleepover today?”

She looks upset. Something happend. Something that upset her enough that she decided to run to your home in the middle of the night.

“Van,” your expression softened, worry flooding your voice, “Are you okay?”

“Yep.” She clicked her tongue, still not looking at you in the eye.

Okay, you won't get anything out of it then. Van likes to talk, but not when it comes to problems like this. Problems at home.

The thing is that you and Van have a lot in common, like your dubious sense of humor and your love for movies, but are opposites in many others; the main one: where your house is always empty, hers is always full. Full of people who take away the smile that you always try hard to keep on her face.

“Okay." You sigh, taking her hand and making your way to the messed bed, “Let’s get some sleep then.”

“Oh.” She looks even more embarrassed, her sweaty hand in yours, “I can take the couch or the floor. I didn’t mean to wake you, I’m sorry.”

You let out an outraged huff. “You run to my house, climb in through my window, ask me to have a sleepover and now you want to sleep on the floor?”

She drags her feet on the floor, “...Yeah?”

You choose to ignore her answer, practically dragging her over to the bed and making her lie down. When she does, Van moves to the other side of the mattress, clearly trying her best not to disturb you, but in a fit of courage and exhaustion, you wrap an arm around her and press her against your chest. She lets out a squeak of surprise at the action.

“Go to sleep, Van.” You mumble against the back of her neck, burying your face in her thick hair.

Her body is still tense against yours, but Van allows one hand to rest on the arm you keep around her waist.

You lose count of how long you spend lying awake in silence cohabiting in each other's space, but when you wake up in the morning, Van is still asleep, her hand never leaving your arm.

You guys don't talk about it and you never find out what really happened to make her feel so bad that day, but Van shows up more often to stay the night. She never tells you when she's coming and you get scared every time when you hear the knocking on the window – you swear she does it on purpose, that little smartass.

You realize that you really love her, not just as a silly high school crush, in the middle of a hot May. When Van makes you stand in the line at the cinema ticket office for two and a half hours and miss the day of school to get tickets to watch Jurassic Park - The Lost World. Because if you saw the first one together then you should see the second one too, obviously.

You're sure you wouldn't put yourself through this for anyone else – but don't let Natalie know that.

The whole situation feels a lot like a date and you try to ignore the anxiety that washes over you as you rummage through your closet for an outfit that you think is good enough for the night. The way Van's jaw drops when she looks at you when she meets you at the front door makes the effort completely worth it.

She spends the entire movie almost bouncing in her seat with excitement and swearing at the parts that don't make sense. Because apparently the movie is also really bad, even though she's so happy watching it, and you manage to be bold enough to hide your face on her shoulder during the “scary” parts and leave your head resting there until the end.

You're not proud at all to say you spent seven bucks on a squeezy dinosaur for her on the way back, but it's your senior year, damn it, let the girl have fun with her silly toy before college.

You go back home – ‘home’ you think now, not ‘your house’. Your home. Your home with Van. – with her ranting about special effects and scenes you don't remember because you spent more time looking at her than the screen and you end up on the balcony before you know it.

“That was so good.” Van is just inches away from you, looking at you with bright eyes full of happiness; your hands are sweaty, so you put them in your pockets so she doesn't notice.

“Yeah, it really was.” You return with a playful smile, “Even though you convinced me to spend hours under the sun for it.”

“Hey!” She protests, moving impossibly closer, “What would the experience be worth without a little effort, huh?”

“Sure.” You giggle.

She's so pretty, you think. Hair down and a black jacket draped over her shoulders, looking at you as if she actually saw you. Knows you. I want to kiss her.

“You had fun today?” Van asks, unable to avoid the small tone of doubt that escapes her voice.

I want you to kiss me, you think.

“Yes,” you answer instead, “Yes, I did.”

One night Van simply comes in through your window and you don't even react anymore, leaning into her body under the covers.

“You gotta stop coming in through my window,” you grumble.

“Then stop leaving it open,” she huffs, “Someone might break in, you know that?”

You can feel her smile against your neck and you're about to fall asleep again when you hear her voice whispering:

“You’re gonna go to my games, now that we actually have a chance to go to the nationals, right?”

“Of course,” you mumble with a comforting pat of her hand on your stomach, “I’ll be the first one in the stands cheering you on. You’ll be embarrassed of me.”

Van buries her face in your shoulder, “Good.”

You get sick the exact same week that her last game until the nationals happens, lamenting the stupid flu that left you feverish and stuck at home for days.

You can't go to school and Van can't come to see you because Coach Martinez has increased the training routine as the team advances in the championship. You assume it must be really tiring because Van doesn't show up at night either. It's embarrassing the way you can't sleep properly without her.

The worst of all: you lose Van's game.

You resign yourself to spending the afternoon on the couch brooding in remorse until you hear a knock on the door.

Coming across Van's sad face with her clearly trying not to cry was not what you expected when you opened the door, knowing for sure that you would only be greeted later – probably after a victory party – with excited screams and bright little dog eyes asking for help to pack her bags.

"We lost." She says, eyes glued on the carpet.

“Oh." You say stupidly, “Oh, dear.”

Your voice seems to turn a switch inside her, because Van lifts her head to you with her lips trembling and the next moment you two are on the couch with her practically sprawled on your lap and crying. Crying hard. You've never seen her like this before.

You hear something about Jackie hitting the post at the last moment as she sobs, but what seems to make her really upset are the balls she couldn't save during the game. Like it would’ve make difference.

Comforting was never really your strong suit, you can't say you're really upset that the Yellowjackets lost, the idea of having Van so far away from you even for a few days didn't please you at all. A bad feeling in your chest told you that something could go wrong.

“Well,” you run your fingers up and down her back, “You know one good thing about this? We can go to Homecoming now.”

Her breathing hitches, but if Van notices how you say 'we' instead of 'you' she doesn't say anything.

She's on your lap, nose close to yours, eyes swollen with tears but with the same look from that night at the movies, the one that makes your hands sweat and leaves your heart weak.

Unlike the movies, however, she kisses you. Like, she actually moves forward and kisses you.

Her lips are wet and soft against yours and you tilt your head to pursue them only for her to pull away with a panicked expression.

"I'm sorry!" Van exclaims, scooting toward the door as if her skin had burned: “I’m sorry! I– I shouldn’t– I’ll see you at school.”

And then she leaves. You don't even have time to react, she runs out the door and gets into that horrible pickup truck – which she had parked in the driveway for the first time less than two weeks ago, wanting to take you for a ride to celebrate the purchase – and you're left standing in the doorway like an idiot after the car disappears from your vision, as if you were waiting for her to come back – you were.

You don't see her at school for the rest of the week. She doesn't show up in class or practice and she certainly doesn't show up at your house, Van is avoiding you and it's so obvious that you feel like crying the entire time you're there, trying to catch a glimpse of her through the halls.

Fuck. You knew this would happen, that you would screw up and make the person you care about the most hate you.

You huff in frustration, letting your head fall against the table feeling someone's gaze on you, someone who isn't Van.

Lottie Matthews isn't skipping physics class, she has no reason to be, so you shouldn't have freaked out as much as you did when you looked up and saw her towering over you next to your desk.

“Shit–” You gasp, jumping back in your seat and almost hitting her chin.

Lottie tilts her head, completely unfazed, with a look of false innocence and curiosity on her face. The look of someone in search of an information.

The vision of Mari crying at the beginning of the year comes back to your mind and a shiver with a line of sweat runs down your spine. Oh no.

“Did you guys break up?” She asks and it's the last thing you expected.

“What?”

Lottie sits next to you, smoothing her skirt over her legs, completely at ease.

“Look, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” she starts with an anxious air, “But please do 'cause I really want to know.”

"Know what?" God, your head is already hurting from this conversation.

Lottie seems to realize that your confusion is genuine, because she stops and frowns at you.

“Didn’t you and Van break up? I thought you were together.”

What the fuck?

"...No? We’re not?”

“Are you asking me?” Lottie arches an eyebrow, also confused.

"No." You clear your throat and roll your tense shoulders, “We’re not.”

“Oh,” she doesn’t seem to know what to say after that, strangely disappointed – just like you.

The period passes with the two of you in an awkward, resigned silence and as you're leaving, Lottie follows you down the halls, attracting glances as you pass by, which was the last thing you wanted at the moment.

“What now?” You sigh.

“I think you should talk to her and sort things out.” Lottie says, “She seems so sad lately, without her usual sparkle.”

You could understand where Lottie was coming from, seeing Van upset was truly heartbreaking, but you couldn't help the bitter pang in your chest. She ran away after the kiss, not you. The kiss she gave you.

“She’s hiding from me." You admit begrudgingly, “Where else could I talk to her, anyway?”

“In the Homecoming, of course!” Lottie nods at you sagely, as if couldn't be more obvious.

“Of course.” You agree, because, the hell, why not?

The Homecoming is on the weekend, the same weekend the team was supposed to be away for the nationals, which must be why the girls are there, to try and lift their spirits.

You recognize Jackie talking excited to Taissa about something near the tables at the back of the gym, next to a grumpy Shauna with a glass of punch in a hand and the other placed on her waist – in a definitely more then friendly way –, but no sign of of Van in sight.

You end up outside with Natalie, smoking against a wall, as always happen at every party you're at together. She's telling you about how she saw Jeff and Randy with a bottle of liquor before coming in and that they would probably baptize the punch, you both talked about ratting them out to one of the teachers in charge after sneaking a few cups and you probably would’ve done that if Lottie hadn't joined you – coming from who knows where – to ask for a cigarette too.

Nat joked about how it probably wasn't like the expensive brands she seemed to prefer at her parties, but she handed one over without a hitch and the three of you sat there, looking up at the dark and starry sky for a moment.

“You haven’t seen her yet?” Lottie breaks the silence, casually breathing in the smoke.

Nat looks at you sideways and all you do is shrug, not wanting to admit the defeat.

“You should try it near the stands.” She declares.

“What are you, a psychic or something?” You scoff, but go anyway because like Van said, Lottie knows about these things.

She is there. Of course she is. Sitting in the stands staring out at the empty field, wearing a light blue suit with a white shirt and a matching shiny tie that you have no idea where she could have gotten, because there's no way her mom would have let her buy it.

Van notices you approaching by the sound of your footsteps on the ground, her head turning to watch you and for a moment you're afraid she'll run away again.

She doesn't, so you approach, trying your best not to run towards her.

“I gotta quit smoking soon,” you say, stepping on the cigarette your hand was holding and making an overly dramatic effort to sit next to her with heavy breaths, “Or I’ll end up being kicked of track ‘till year is finished.”

Van snorts, “Right, Ponyboy Curtis.”

For a moment it's like anything hasn’t changed between you both, you bet that if you tried with conviction you could almost pretend that nothing had happened. Almost.

“You ran away from me." You say.

“I did.” Van lowers her head, quietly. Embarrassed. You’re not sure of what exacly.

"Why?" You ask, because that's the question that's been running through your mind for days.

“I–” Van looks away from you, “I thought you wouldn't want that.”

“And I thought you knew how much I wanted it." You say and Van lifts her head to stare at you with wide, hopefully eyes, “What do you want, Van?”

Her jaw drops and she looks like she was expecting everything but that, her hands twitch on her thighs, as if she wants to reach you.

“You look so beautiful right now." She sighs softly before steadying her voice, “You look so beautiful that I want to kiss you again.”

"Do it."

And she does, hard and desperate, crushing her nose against yours, as if she's hungry and can't get enough; you wrap your arms around her, hands touching her with the same need.

The lack of air is too much, so Van pulls away from you to immediately start distributing quick kisses down your neck, as if it could all disappear in a second, becoming confident when you tilt your head to grant her more access and only stopping after the hiss that you let go because she bites.

“So…” she laughs nervously, “What now?”

"Now?" You’re out of breath, “Well, can we go back inside and help Nat steal liquour to screw with Jeff and Randy or…”

"Or?" Van arches an eyebrow in amusement.

“We can go home and I can show you how much I missed you.” You shrug, casually tightening your hands on her waist.

“Hm,” she pretends to think about it, “I guess I like the first option better.”

Van laughs at the sound of your offended squeal and avoids the slap you try to give her shoulder.

“Careful, baby,” she intertwines your hand with hers, “I’m gonna start to think that you love me.”

“Oh, you better know that.”

You pull her by her stupid shiny tie and kiss her when she laughs again and let Van guide you to that hideous truck staggering laughing through the crowd of students.

Yeah, you think. I wouldn't have it any other way.

[rataccatak]

Analysis of how KaySD draws Sergey Razumovsky

Or: trying to justify a thirstpost about the world's most terrible man

Sergey's gone through a number of artists through the years, and I gotta say, KaySD's rendition has captured my heart. In fact, it was a screenshot of Kay's Sergey that first got me into Major Grom. While Phob's is the official art style that we associate with the comics, Kay's style, I believe, better serves Sergey's character in the current PD run.

Genre-wise, PD returns to being a big-action, ensemble comic, which--compared to The Game's tight conflict and human drama focus--deliberately implements Kay's more traditionally comic-book style to this effect. The first arc (nine volumes in total) of PD are all Kay; though the current issues are being outsourced to a number of different artists now, Kay's style--with its roots in distinctly American superhero comics, such as DC--was what they wanted to prime audience's expectations with. After Time of the Raven, there was a big push for Bubble to adhere their stories to big names like Marvel, and with that came the desire to usher in things like a multiverse, space and supernatural elements, and franchise crossovers. Plague Doctor was one of their latest installments of that new "culture," and they had to match their aesthetics appropriately.

Okay, but that brings me back to the brainrot part of this post, which is HOT DAMN KAY'S SERGEY LOOKS SICK???

The whole idea of Plague Doctor is that, for like seven years or something, Sergey has been declared dead or missing or otherwise MIA. Nobody, both in-universe and irl, knows where he is or what the fuck he's up to. You crack open issue 1, encounter a guy in sunglasses and a hat who is painfully obviously Sergey, but you get to the last page and

(I will say this is probably the most unflattering frame of him. His chin makes him look like such a chad derogatory)

BAM. HOMEBOY IS ROCKING A NEW HAIRCUT, HE'S WEARING ANOTHER STUPID PURPLE SUIT, HE'S RIPPED, AND HE HAS BLUE EYES.

This isn't the soft, sort of angelically beautiful Sergey we're used to seeing from Phobs. It's radically different, an entirely different character almost, which was the intent.

His new look is more practical, both tactically and socially. His hair is cut, so people won't recognize him as easily. It won't get in his face or get grabbed during fights, and combined with his more muscled build, this is a Sergey who's taking things more seriously this time around. Gone is the flamboyant cape and swishing fiery locks; the plague doctor campaign is no longer a passion, but a duty. And he's ready to enter the thunderdome and get his hands dirty and god damn it, he will die trying.

Kay does take care to preserve the core elements of Phob's Sergey, while making a hard left into traditional masc territory. He's still unrealistically attractive, in that distinctly soft and youthful way. He's more noticeably fit but still maintains a slim, smooth appearance.

But on top of that, he adds this charm and charisma to him that is distinctly boyish (as in, young and mischievous, a pretty face that's up to no good). It makes his persona as a young, leftist radical more believable; he looks like a student revolutionaire, angry and passionate about all issues topical and trending.

He does look more obviously aged. Guy is now in his mid(?) thirties, and the past five years probably amounted to like three lifetimes of stress, so it certainly makes sense. Compared to how Kay drew The Game Sergey, his face is more defined with sharper lines, muscularity, and wrinkles. The short hair also ages him somewhat, making him look less angelic and more like... a regular dude.

And of course, there's the overnight peach fuzz.

The more mature, aged look helps him actually look like a person who's lived a life as loaded and fucked up as Sergey's. He's a guy whose parents died, grew up in foster care, became a CEO that rocketed to stardom in five years, committed the most elaborate fucked up terrorist campaign ever, and then immediately fell from fame to the deepest coldest cell in St Petersburg (and this is all just the OG Major Grom run). He's not Phob's Sergey (or Rag, whoever it was in The Game)--a blameless childish pretty boy who's detached from his crimes. Kay does a good job in making Sergey have this subtle undertone of... unsettled, unhinged, what have you. I don't know how much of this is hindsight bias, but he looks like a guy with a fucked up secret. You wouldn't think twice if you were seeing him in a grocery store or something but I can imagine later recognizing his mugshot on the news and thinking wow now that i think about it, he really does look like a serial killer.

And let's talk about his fashion. For all the features of Sergey's flamboyant costumes in Phob's renditions, Kay dresses him quite casually, and it works, ironically, to make him look deceptively plain in the way all extremely rich people dress (think of the $10k white t-shirts and sunglasses get-up all rich men wear). He dresses like his current social stature: a new-money sod who has gotten used to his wealth enough that he doesn't have to show off with his clothes anymore. Of course, this could also be turned on its head and instead, be an indication of Sergey's original, cheap clothes that he habited from his childhood. Certainly, the ironic rightwing graphic tees Kay puts him in edge towards that point of view, only now they're colored by Sergey's sense of political humor. I doubt a "god guns government" shirt is selling for $500 at some luxury tailor shop.

This is what I love about Kay's Sergey. In making him look more human, we get to orient him more organically into our own world. He looks like a thirty year old loser who studied CS in college and now commits cyber terrorism and doesn't know how to cook. He looks like a young adult leftist who is terminally online and has 500+ open tabs on Marxist theory. He looks like a guy who became too rich too young, who was the world's angle and then its devil in the span of like two years, and is now disillusioned with it all, who wears $5 graphic tees and stays up all night looking behind his back and tries desperately to find something that actually matters.

Once Sergey looks more believable, he becomes more understandable. And the more we understand him, the more the story has the potential to make him intrigue and surprise and reach us in multiple, unexpected ways.

[cirrus-grey]

Didn't know about that Corruption theory before (and didn't wanna reblog the post for spoilers) but now I'm curious, what other theories did people have while the show was still airing? I joined the fandom around 160 so anything before that is a mystery to me.

Referencing this post (beware, it has spoilers for The Magnus Protocol).

Oh goodness, so so many. Only a few that I remembered off the top of my head, but I spent some time today trawling the depths of my "magnus archives speculation/analysis" tag and found a couple more fun ones.

Most of the ones I did remember are either still popular headcanons (Web!Martin), or actually turned out to be canon (Jonah!Elias). The Gertrude one always stuck in my head because it's very silly on the surface but also draws attention to the fact of like - how was her skin still in good enough condition to wear after being buried for months? (And Lietner's too, for that matter). Was Nikola just wearing really tattered rotten shreds???

Anyway. Some that I remembered, which all relate to Martin for some reason:

Backup Archivist: Heading into the Unknowing, Elias had Martin reading statements specifically to train him to be a stand in Archivist in case Jon died. Also included sub-theories that he could end up able to compel people on his own, share the role with Jon, or take over entirely if the show pulled a bait-and-switch and Martin was the real protagonist all along.

Who's the Father?: Every single possible theory about who Martin's dad was and what implications that could have on the show, from Leitner to Elias to Peter Lukes to that one dude Peter banished to the Lonely in his statement in 159.

Schwartzwald Cousins: Albrecht von Closen says he and Clara/Carla had trouble having kids in his first statement, but in a later episode says they have two boys. Part 1 of the theory was that the kids were actually avatars who'd emerged from the mausoleum after Albrecht disturbed it, and been adopted by the childless couple. Part 2 was - well - it's canon that Gerry is descended from one of these kids. The theory was, what if Martin was descended from the other? Gerry seems to have some Eye powers linked to his heritage and upbringing, so it was speculated that Martin might turn out to have some as well and be important to either Elias's plans, or to thwarting him (this tied into the Backup Archivist theory nicely). A sub-theory was that they were significantly closer cousins, Martin's mum's maiden name had been Keay, and Martin K. Blackwood was Martin Keay Blackwood all along.

And the ones that I found in the tag (credit in brackets):

Martin’s mum was a runaway Lukas (@/centaurianthropology, here)

The lighter was linked to the Desolation (@agnesmontague) + an addition by me that I'm so proud of in hindsight - "I think the web design pretty much confirms that it’s linked to the Web, but if it’s the Desolation as well, might it be linked to the other occasions we’ve seen those two powers interact? Namely, the ever mysterious Hill Top Road?" (Here)

Another of my posts that I'm delighted to reread (here) reminded me of the many, many, "what's up with the tapes?" theories. I remember "the tapes are sent by the Web", "the tapes are sent by Elias", "the tapes are manifestated unconsciously by Jon" (my personal favorite, sadly disproven), and I think there were also some "the tapes are Gertrude's ghost" posts???

Elias was the Eye the same way Michael was the Spiral - Gertrude sacrificed him to stop the Watcher's Crown (@/statementbegins, here)

Also reading through these is reminding me that there was a stretch where we were calling the Vast and Lonely the "Void" and "Isolation", which I love.

This is just a select few posts from 2018, so there's a lot more under the tag if you're interested in looking! Link below, copy and paste into a web (lol) browser because the archive (lmao) page doesn't work on the app.

https://cirrus-grey.tumblr.com/archive/tagged/magnus%20archives%20speculation%2Fanalysis

If anyone else remembers other old theories please feel free to drop them in the notes! I know there were so many more that I don't have saved.

[lowkeyrobin]

hii! :D what about a tmr fic with frypan? like a nice fluffy platonic one where reader and him are just besties. could be like a headcanon or a fic idk my boy frypan does not get enough love anything would be fine

oh my god yes of course!! ; and you're so right he does NOT get enough love within this fandom & I rlly wish we saw more of him in death cure :( that was his best era and I'll stand by that ; but yes of course, thanks for requesting, hope you enjoy!!!

FRYPAN ; besties core

summary ; what it's like being best friends w fry

warnings ; language, most of this being death cure stuff cause idk

word count ; 417

masterlist

yall r tied to the HIP

you're literally that duo

forget newt and thomas or brenda and jorge, you and fry are the moment

you're literally the only person to call him siggy (his actual wckd name) and that's a rare occurrence

you have a handshake too

it's corny but it's cute

he shows you food recipes a lot

he also taught you how to drive cause he was a natural at it

you guys cackled for a second because of irony + adrenaline after he flipped it on the way to the last city

newt was stumbling everywhere and thomas was worried you all died for a sec 💀 and you're both hysterical before you begin to dig around the turned over vehicle looking for the rifle that fry brought

you two are left in the background while the others do their main character shit

like playing checkers, tic tac toe, and rock paper scissors while waiting for brenda to steal the bus and rescue the other kids wckd had in their possession

you were on the bridge while fry was working the control panel

you were the one kind of directing him for 100% accuracy + the first to get down to brenda and the kids to lead them back to lawrence's lair

meanwhile you were joking with each other the whole way there about how he didn't work fast enough and how he hit so many buildings with the bus and how you were shit at communicating

in the safe haven, you spend most of your time together

you fish, he cooks

and a lot of the time you help him cook

you get drunk off of gallys secret recipe from the Glade for the first time in a long time and run around on the beach together

gally joins you for a bit just to look over you so you didn't end up drowning

fry would be fine, but you? eh... maybe

lots of wrestling on the beach and drawing in the sand together

and regaining memories together 💔

you guys always share what you remember right when it happens, whether it be in your sleep or if you zoned out or were hallucinating it

"dude, my real name is pre-wicked/name!"

"honestly, y/n fits you better"

"im not gonna be saying that when you remember yours, siggy"

"man..."

lots of coping in general together, and making new phrases to create like modern genz slang

"that fit ate up, brenda!"

"thank you!"

"bro had that crank rizz 💀"

"y/n, someone just died"

[banmitbandit]

Shoutout to a few of my bloodswap Solluxes :) Infodumps about them in the Keep Reading if I formatted Tumblr Correctly. I just couldn't stop myself from writing a bunch about all of them Q~Q

I always wanna draw more of Sollux so more bloodswaps is obviously the way to go about it :)

Burgundy!Sollux - telosAutotelic

Sollux dies pre-SGRUB, and can't bring up the energy to care about anything anymore, let alone his whole red and blue schtick. Shortly after the game begins, he's "gifted" a new robot body by Equius in return for having done some extensive troubleshooting for him in the past. He's horrified to find his new metal husk has all the features wrong- the horns are wrong, the teeth are wrong, fuck, even the stupid red and blue are wrong, and he hates it so much - he had no idea he could even feel hate anymore - he only uses it when it's more efficient to be a robot than a ghost. He quite literally doesn't have the time to fuck around these days. Equius is miffed his psychological warfare to get Sollux pitch with him fails so spectacularly.

Mutant!Sollux - tacticsAllogeneics

Sollux tells everyone he has red blood, but no one believes him because that's totally not a thing. This is all according to keikaku (Keikaku means plan). Despite this, everyone seems to think he's a pretty cool dude, and so when SGRUB comes around, everyone kind of just looks to him to lead. His only experience with leading is strategy games and a few FLARP sessions. He's absolutely miserable. He ends up learning just how fucked up his friends are in the thinkpans, and it falls on him to have to try and haul their asses into being useful. It causes some ire with his friends who come to the conclusion he sees them as chess pieces rather than people, but really he just wants to get through this game without people kicking the metaphorical bucket. He's forced to play the healer in video games.

Purple!Sollux - tamedAnimus

Sollux is the descendant of one of the most notorious purplebloods of all time, who had the art of subjuggulating down to a science, and he wants nothing to do with his legacy or the church, only maintaining a few rituals out of routine habit. He's found a good couple of heretics who are pretty chill, and as loathe as he is to admit it, he wants to see them thrive. He makes a conscious effort to keep his violent highblooded tendencies in check for them, though his mood swings are both frequent and intense. One problem, a rather big one, is that he can quite literally feel the emotions of those around him, hyper-empathetic to the point where strong emotions from his peers during the game give him migraines. When things start kicking off and people start dying, Sollux acts on the fear, panic, and rage that's flooding him like adrenaline and attacks two of his friends, losing his eye in the process. When everything cools down, guilt eats him into hypervigilance, leaving him paranoid and self-destructive.

Violet!Sollux - trenchantAnglerfish

Sollux has spent his entire life deep underwater, where few seadwellers dare to live. The Continental Catfish keeps itself well fed but Nepeta has difficulty finding the thing most days, so Sollux's small army of fishbots keep an eye on it for her, tracking its movements. Because he's never gone above water, he's something of a NEET, and Nepeta is glad she can push him onto some of her friends when the game starts because he really needs to get out more. He's not the worst, all things considered; he's somewhat petty and spiteful when wronged, but this is mostly a result of his on-again, off-again relationship with Karkat, who happens to think he's a huge tool with an even bigger ego (and his best friend). The first thing he alchemizes is a pair of dark-tinted glasses for his extreme light sensitivity.

[ninjagirlstar5]

I'M BACK TO DOING MORE SPRITE EDITS, YAHOOO. But this time, it's a swap talent AU, and we're starting off pretty normal with Shinji Kasai as the Ultimate Boxer! (This has been sitting in my drafts for a while cause I had other hobbies to attend to.)

Honestly, when I approached this design for Shinji and this talent, I decided simplicity would be best. Shinji's OG design was pretty simple in of itself as LINUJ mentioned in his concept art that he had tried to simplify his firefighter uniform on purpose so that it'd be easier to draw. And honestly, Shinji is a pretty simple dude and boxers wear simple outfits when training or in the ring so simplicity is best for him. So I gave him a tank top, shorts with a design based off of his original uniform, training shoes, socks, a boxing champion belt like Hajime's, and some hand protection...things. I don't know what they're called, I just saw a reference and based it off of that. Of course, I kept the daisy/flower necklace as it's an important part of his character, although the origin for it is different than his OG counterpart. I also had him grow out his hair in a half up half down hairstyle and...wow. Shinji sure looks good with longer hair, huh. Really proud on how that turned out. I also stuck pretty close to his original color palette, although his tank top is a much lighter shade of gray than his original black shirt. And with that, he's done.

Next up is Yoruko and I decided to add a little bit of fun to these posts by adding my thoughts on how these different talents would affect certain elements of their backgrounds and how they became these Ultimates in the first place.

So, in Shinji's original background, he became a firefighter on a sort of apprenticeship by helping out his local fire department and what inspired him to become one was when he ran into a burning building to save a child when he lacked training and was thanked by them when he went to visit them in the hospital. In this scenario as a boxer, I think Shinji would have started boxing as a hobby and would occasionally take on matches for fun and to challenge himself but wasn't that passionate about it at first. Like it was kind of a side gig that he partook in every now and then but hadn't planned to make it a long-standing career at the time. It wasn't until a(n older) child, most likely sickly to tie in the hospital bit, came up to him and gave him the daisy necklace after a match, saying how much they admired his strength and enthusiasm in the ring, wishing they can be like him one day. That moment inspired him so much that he decided to become serious in boxing, hoping to become a kind and passionate role-model for those who want to partake in boxing one day. Or at the very least, inspire people to have enthusiasm for a sport they like. As for his burn scar on his back, well...who's to say that there couldn't have been a stage accident that turned into a fire? Shinji, upon seeing the escalating fire and ever the kind soul, jumps in to help evacuate the people despite lacking any sort of training in this case. But of course, while helping a survivor, he got hit and stuck under some burning rubble, and it was his mentor/uncle that came to his rescue and got him out. But when he woke up in the hospital, he found out that his uncle died while saving him. So he both gets to keep his scar AND his survivor's guilt. Hooraaaay. (sarcasm)

My man really do be going through it even when he's Not a firefighter, huh?

[generositygullet]

A letter to Akira Toriyama

Dear Akira Toriyama,

I first interacted with dragonball when I was in 6th grade or so, when I started playing dragon ball fusions for the 3ds since the trailer looked cool. Kind of a weird start right? But I was getting really into anime at the time, and wanted to check out one of the most popular ones. I had NO idea who the characters were, and had NO clue what the story was about. But for some reason against all the odds, as soon as I saw the title screen boot up with that soaring music I was hooked. The game was super fun, no doubt about it. But what REALLY kept me going when playing it, was the world of dragon ball itself.

Again I had no clue who any of these people were. But seeing these characters interact with each other, seeing these different setpieces made, seeing all of these powers and personalities, it was unlike anything I’d ever experienced before. It channeled the raw kid desire in me to see two buff dudes duking it out, and god I adored every bit of it.

I didn't dig any deeper than that initially, and like all my other hyperfixations it died down. But again in 7th grade I started playing fighterz, and I was hooked again. But this time I dug deeper in preparation for the release of the new GT dlc, and so the first dragon ball media I actually watched? Was GT. Which is hilarious in hindsight, but I still adored every second of it.

In 8th grade things were not going so well for me, I was losing friends due to being an asshole, and I had to change myself to be worthy of the people around me. I was pretty depressed, and everything seemed sad and hopeless (I know it's pretty dramatic for a literal like 13 year old but bear with me lmao). It's around that time when I decided to watch Dragon Ball Super. And again, I was hooked. I binged it so fast, all 130 something episodes. I could talk big about the characters and everything, but honestly it was just so plain cool. It made me feel excited and happy, it made me feel like everything was ok. And those positive feelings made that much of a difference in me.

From that point on I always was interested in Dragon Ball. my first and only hyperfixation to never really go away. I read the OG dragonball, and started REALLY noticing your artistic talent. From the way you drew Goku moving across the battlefield and the poses he struck. To the illustrations of the action and the punches thrown. It was all so dynamic and energetic. When I was reading it I was always engaged, excited to see the next panel. I wanted to channel the same energy in my own art somehow, to encapsulate the same excitement you instilled in me with your drawings.

I FINALLY got around to watching and reading Z a little later. And of course I loved it. I knew all the basic plot beats, and had a 3 in one Goku vs Vegeta volume collection that I would reread constantly. But seeing them play it is so different. I also started to admire your character design more and more. Trying to draw them in my free time, and getting a bit sad when I couldn't capture the same magic you could.

All of this, of course, was older material though. This was all before my time, I was never there to experience it when it initially happened. Not for super, not for the OG DB, and not for Z. I adored it all, but I always knew what was going to happen.

I remember the reaction on my face when the news of DBS Superhero dropped. I was so so SO excited. More than you could ever imagine. Something new, something I could see with my own eyes, and something about Piccolo and Gohan??? It was amazing. And seeing it in theaters a few years later? God I was on the edge of my seat the entire film. I even started reading the DBS manga, I think it's amazing so far.

When I heard that you were gone yesterday night, I was crushed.

I’m a junior now. And after a long time of thinking about it, being anxious, afraid, and scared of the future. I think I want to be an artist or filmmaker. I want to bring the same energy you did to the world. I'm still trying to figure out my artstyle, and how I want to draw. I’m not great at it, but no matter what, I want to keep going. Because I want to bring a character to life, like you brought Son Goku to life and so many others as well. I want to inspire so many others like you inspired me. With your messages, you brought me happiness. You told me that simplicity was ok with Son Goku. You told me that we need to fight for what we love with Son Gohan. You told me that we should aim to be better than our predecessors with Piccolo Junior. You told me that we shouldn't let our pride consume us with Vegeta. You’ve shown me and the entire world so so much. And I hope you were proud of it. I’m

I said the world of Dragon Ball earlier, but really, it was your world Akira Toriyama. And your world changed mine forever in the best way. Thank you, for letting me dream again.

[rubykgrant]

rvb for the hyperfix ask!

📃 what is the plot of your hyperfixation? and is it a movie, game, show, etc? 📌 how did you find your hyperfixation? ✨ what draws you towards your hyperfixation? what is interesting about it? 🎥 do you have any favorite scenes from your hyperfixation? 💕tell us about one of your favorite characters and why you like them!

First of all, thank you for indulging me in this, I very much appreciate the chance to info-dump with my nonsense, you are a wonderful person~

So... RVB. More than 2 decades ago, some guys figured out how they could play Halo, sort of use one character as the "camera", make the other characters bop their helmets up and down, then dub their voices into it and make that a show. There is the vague background-plot of the actual Halo lore happening, but the ACTUAL plot of RVB? The first few seasons are just 2 groups of guys, standing around, talking, arguing, and trying to kill each other. Red Team has been told to kill the Blues, and Blue Team has been told to kill the Reds. Why? Because. One guy dies, but comes back as a "ghost". This will become a pattern. There is a theme through the series about how some people are unable to let go of grief, and it eventually destroys them, the message of learning how to see enemies as real people, learning to accept flaws in yourself and others so they can become strengths. Over and over again, there are multiple groups of soldiers who have been told "you are the good guys, they are the bad guys, you need to kill them", and sometimes the most difficult thing is to finally accept the truth and try to live with yourself. There are highly advanced and unique AI, once all part of one system together, forced into being singular Fragments, tortured into forgetting what they were, but unable to stop missing what they don't have. Despite being data and treated like tools, they develop their own "humanity"... for better, and for worse. Through it all, the same group of Red and Blue goobers keep talking and arguing. They win against highly trained special agents with incredibly advanced equipment, vicious mercenaries with back-up from a corrupt military group, and a reality-breaking "god". These clowns even got their own circus music (the Warthog Polka)

Waaaaay back in the day, when I was like... 15? A friend of mine had a brother, who had a friend, who let him borrow some DVDs of Red VS Blue, and I watched it at the friend's house. I had never played Halo (still haven't), but I got a chuckle out of it. I occasionally watched it when another friend would pull it up on their computer, and for a while, that was it... in 2021, I randomly thought to myself "Oh yeah... Red VS Blue was a thing". I hadn't thought about it for a decade. So I decided to watch it up to the point I remembered, somewhere in season 5. Some of the jokes... did not age well, but it was a nice little stroll down memory lane. Then I realized they made MORE after that. This show, at that time, had 18 seasons. So I kept watching, and now it has FILLED UP MY BRAIN

There is this fun aspect of very casual, conversational dialogue in the middle of absolutely bonkers situations. The characters will be doing the most extreme, dangerous sci-fi nonsense, and they still just bicker and chit-chat like regular dudes. It will also randomly sneak up, and hit you with EMOTIONS. There are incredibly sweet and sad moments, and others that have no business being so IMPACTFUL and MEANINGFUL, but they are. The characters are all so stupid, yet full of potential and depth, everybody is just perfect fuel for imagination

I have a few favorite scenes! In the episode "Long Time No See", the characters Epsilon and Carolina are shown working together, gathering information on a shady organization. In the middle of this, they are threatened by a group of security soldiers, and we get see how Epsilon, as an AI with the memories of the other Fragments, can assist Carolina; time slows down as the AI work at bullet-speed, with Epsilon running calculations, making a plan for how Carolina can fight back and escape. The memories of the Fragments can interact with Epsilon, and give suggestions or feedback based on their skills. It is just so AWESOME to see how far the characters have come, the teamwork they share... and it is also a little bitter-sweet, because seeing the Fragments like this is how it could have (should have) been with Alpha. It also shows Carolina, who was once determined not to get close to anybody again (after losing so many people she cared about), has really bonded with Epsilon, and it helps her realize she misses the rest of the clowns. Another favorite scene has some background context; the intro to the series, the very first scene of the very first episode, is Grif and Simmons having a conversation- "Do you ever wonder why we're here?" "It's one of life's great mysteries". As the show goes on, that becomes a reoccurring conversation, sometimes as a joke, sometimes as something more relevant. In season 15, the main characters meet another group of Blues and Reds, who all resemble them in some way, but are also kind of "mirror opposites". The characters have the same armor color, but different voice actors... except for Simmons. His look-alike is Gene, and they have the same VA (Simmons insists they don't sound similar at ALL, Gene is totally annoying). When it is revealed this group is EVIL, there is a moment when we see one soldier in maroon armor pull a knife and attempt to stab another soldier in maroon armor. This is Simmons and Gene, but which is which? Grif arrives, and has that same problem. Both Gene/Simmons insist "I'm the real Simmons, shoot him"... so Grif asks- "Why are we here?". One maroon soldier says they're here to stop the bad guys. The other one says "We don't know why we're here. It's still one of life's great mysteries". HECK YEAH, THAT'S YOUR SIMMONS. There are like a thousand other moments I like that are pure comedy, but those are the big emotional moments

I've rambled about Grif and Simmons a stupid amount, I've also gone on long tangents for Church and Tex, so I'll talk about one of my other favorites, Tucker! In the beginning, he doesn't take any of this seriously (but who does). He's there to be an annoying, shameless flirt, and does so with ease. The thing is, even when he's acting obnoxious and immature, there are moments when you can tell he's actually capable of a LOT. He's smart, when he lets himself think without getting distracted, he's a strong fighter when he's not showing off, and he's genuinely got a good heart (when he's not complaining). As the show goes on, he becomes more important... whether he likes it or not. What do you do when all your big-talk about being the coolest dude ever turns out to be TRUE, but that also means you're responsible for keeping people alive? Tucker also easily fits into any combination of characters, whoever he is with, they get a fun dynamic going (even Sarge, the Red who claims to hate the Blues with an endless burning passion, will do some back-up beat-boxing for Tucker when he sings a taunting song at mutual enemies). He'll tease the others and be a little jerk, but is also incredibly protective of the people he cares about. Tucker once got attacked by a space alien that left a parasite baby in him, and years later, he carries around pictures of Junior in his wallet so he can show off how much he loves his son. Tucker is incredibly clever, and has a lot of emotional depth... he just wishes he didn't have to worry so much, all he wants is to stand around and talk to his best friend. Through all the bravado, the insecurities, and the bow-chicka-wow-wow jokes, Tucker is just very interesting AND entertaining~ (also, thanks to one off-hand comment another character made about his "metro-sexual good looks", all the fans kind of just agreed that under the helmet, Tucker is the prettiest)

Thanks for asking! (and sorry for rambling so much haha)

[waterfalls-bunny]

HI HI HI sry i disappeared sleep and school eatin my life smh ANYGAY

who's your favorite south park character, what's your favorite hc for them, and what's your favorite canon thing of theirs >:3

also hope ur exams go/went great :D

YIPPEE YOU REPLIED ye i have some things to say (｀▽´)

My favorite south park character is Kenny!! (he appears in 99% of my drawings send help) tho other favs are Butters, Wendy, and Kyle in that order :D As for why Kenny is my favorite tbh sometimes i wonder the same thing ( •̀ - • ) LMAO jk but is kinda dumb why he's my fav ig. For this we have to go back to 9yo me who knew nothing about internet but somehow ended up watching a gameplay of SOT and i gotta be super honest my first crush was princess Kenny srs

🚶🚶🚶 not Kenny, PRINCESS Kenny. And that was my first glance to south park ever, I never had interest in the series until like 2 years ago when I decided to screw the bad opinions and give the series a shot best decision ever honestly, so ye I always liked Kenny www but besides that well I can come up here and analyze the little blond in many aspects!! about how he's one of the nicest guys in town, how of a good brother model role he is to Karen, how all he really cares about are his friends and some boobs (silly lol), about his poverty and how I can relate to some point to that too and all of his character lore about his immortality, how it affects him and the many things I as a fan can think based of that!! I also have a Kenny plushie I happen to bring whenever I go to a trip so even my parents who know nothing about south park know Kenny and are fond of the little guy <3 so yeah he's my fav

Now about hc? ｢( • ﾍ •) I have one stupid hc but is so stupid LMAO so in another post I said I like Luka Megurine from vocaloid and one day i was playing SOT and had a vision:

Hc Kenny is a Luka simp HAHAHAS

Is so stupid bc it fits him so well 😭😭😭bc for even more context Luka fans are kinda known to be... pervert and unhinged (generalizing not everyone is like that ofc just look at me a repulsed ace guy 「(°ヘ°) but yeah. It has no explanation besides combining my 2 favorites things LMAO and this is a level 4 hc so I'm gonna add another hc more sp related which should be mmhmm wow I can't really think in any right now besides the obvious ones

kenny is the most knowledgeable about drinks, drugs and stuff bc he tried em all (and died some times) bc he knows he will always come back

this also applies to piercings and tattoos, smth along the lines of "death hurt more than getting a piercing"

he will still treat Karen like a baby even when she's all grown up

he's in charge of the groceries at home

he secretly loves being babied by his friends and goes along bc he rarely gets that treatment (watch covid especial for reference about how cartman, stan and kyle treat him like their son sometimes)

for example tho is too basic lmao. I have another hc about Kenny being peruvian because I AM PERUVIAN AND I WILL PERUVIANIZE SOUTH PARK AHAHA /lh also bc after watching the peruvian episodes I gen thought Kenny has more of a peruvian vibe than Craig if I'm 100% honest, like I get the Craig peruvian hc and is cool and all but all he did in those 2 episodes was complaining to the main 4 to the point even Kenny (a very chill dude) was mad at him LMAO and by the plot is that he ended up involved, like if Craig went along to them to pretend to be a mexican band (he denied it at the end of the second episode) then he would've be part of a mexican prophecy somehow too so the argument of "craig is peruvian because he was in the profecy!!" is kinda random to me lol. But I love the fanarts and hc!!! This is just a silly thought bc like no way dude we literally have Kenny dancing to peruvian music and I'm telling from my expertise in being peruvian for 19 years that you need to vibe with the music to be one of us trust, like that yelled at me PERUVIAN pluuus being peruvian to the other hispanic countries is smth very mocked on, poverty hella exists here and I dunno I feel Kenny fits being a peruvian guy? Or well having a tiny bit of peruvian dna im fine with that too *baila que linda flor del grupo nectar*

Last question!! My favorite thing about Kenny canonically is definitely how of a good sibling he is, I also like Kyle for this reason but I think is different with Kenny due to how easy it was for him to give up on his family and not care but he does! I wish we get more interactions between the McCormicks smh stares at Kevin

And well that was it :D I hope ya like it also I actually did well in my exams!!! I'm surviving law 💥💥💥

[starwalker03]

The worst thing Bruce could do is have a Batman gambit and reveal he knows who the new Deathstroke is and didn’t tell anyone but Clark. How would Dick react to that?

So I had a good idea of what batman gambit meant but I googled it to be sure and wow. That's an actual recognised thing. Huh. Honestly that's almost funny.

Anyway. That'd be fucking hilarious. Oh my god can you imagine. Like. First of all we gotta think of the situation. Why does he have to do this? The most sense is he's atte lying to psych Deathstroke out and manipulate him into giving himself away. I have an idea where this'd likely happen in canon but all I can imagine, without spoiling, is that Bruce says it to Artemis when the league finally talks to her. And she ferries this back to Dick like 'oh my god dude. Dude. DUDE. HE KNOWS WHO YOU ARE'

Which. Oh boy that would not go well.

Part of me wants to believe Dick knows Brice well enough to see through it and recognise it as a batman gambit, because it's very much a cliche batman move. But. This would cause such an emotional reaction I don't think Dick would be able to see it. And even if he could there's be a very angry voice in his head screaming 'HE KNOWS HE KNOWS HE KNOWS AND HES DONE NOTHING'

Oh boy. Honestly the only way it ends is by Dick confronting him. He has so much emotional turmoil over all of this and hearing that Bruce actually has known who he is. Possibly all along. Dick now gets to analyse every small thing in hopes of figuring out when Bruce found out. Perhaps Slade told him? Or Bruce saw his face on security camera footage? Or an endless assortment of guesses. Dick has barely come face to face with Bruce over the decade because Slade kept them apart so everything he's analysing isn't even something he was part of firsthand, it's all from a third person perspective of how Bruce has behaved in the past ten years.

So yeah. It ends with a confrontation. It ends with Dick jumping him on a patrol and hanging him off a very tall building. Or it ends with Dick killing every active mobster currently on Brice's radar to draw his attention and empty his schedule so he can yell at Bruce on top of a building.

It ends with Dick screaming at him because WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU KNOW. HOW LONG HAVE YOU KNOWN?

And Bruce realises that he's made a very big mistake because he has no idea who Deathstroke is and this is not the reaction he was expecting. He just has to bluff. But everything he says in hopes of de-escalating the situation is not working.

How long have you known? Since Slade Wilson died. (seems a recent enough time, and also would have been a lot of chaotic things happening that something could slip without Deathstroke noticing he'd given himself away) [he's known since I was free. Since Slade was gone. He didn't come for me. He didn't try to stop me from taking up the mantle. He found out and he left me]

Why didn't you track me down? Why have you never tried to speak to me? We didn't have bulletproof evidence of Wilson's passing till you attacked Red Arrow. I've seen your files as Renegade, by then I assumed you'd made your decision to follow your masters footsteps. (this makes sense. This is something anyone may think in my situation) [master? My master?? he thinks- he doesn't- he didn't want me back. He didn't care to find me. He thinks I want this]

You're a fucking piece of work Bruce you know that. Everything he ever told me about you is true. I suppose it's up to you to decide if that's true. Don't blame me for what he's done, or what you keep deciding to do. (why is he taking this so personally? Why would he call me by name? Why would Slade make a point to put dirt on my name?) [He doesn't care. He doesn't care. He doesn't care. He doesn't UNDERSTAND]

Fucking hell Bruce. How do you even live with yourself. I may be the mercenary but you're just as bad as any of them. God how do put that mask on and call yourself a hero while you drag more innocent kids into the line of fire to save you. I have never put my children in danger. You've killed two of them now haven't you? And you didn't even try to save either of them. I've heard about Jason, I know what he did when he came back. God knows how you managed to manipulate him into working with you again, he was better off dead than fighting alongside you! You have no idea what you're talking about! I HAVE NO IDEA? ME? CAN YOU EVEN FUCKING HEAR YOURSELF?! who the hell do you think you are?! I THOUGHT YOU KNEW BRUCE, HAVE YOU ALREADY FORGOTTEN EVERYTHING I-

And he stops. And he takes a breath. And he stumbles backwards as he really looks at Bruce for the first time since the start of this conversation. And he realises.

It's a batman gambit. He's bluffing.

He's bluffing.

He doesn't know.

And he just starts laughing. Quietly chuckling until he's leaned over his knees and holding his gut because he has to laugh or he'll break into even more hysterics because BRUCE DOESN'T KNOW.

What the hell are you laughing about? You don't know. You don't. You're bluffing. This is all a bluff, you don't know who I am. Oh my god how did I fucking fall for that? Jesus Bruce you're a real piece of work.

What gave it away?

And Dick would stop. And look at him. And just shake his head with one final laugh. And he'd take off his mask.

Bruce doesn't recognise him for a moment. There's a few seconds of silence as it dawns on him. And Dick watches as it does, hurt by the fact it takes so long, and waits for Bruce to react.

Bruce has no words but he has to make sure. He has to know. He has to hear him say it-

Dick?

Rethinking anything you've just said?

I- I didn't-

You're right. You didn't. You did not. You had no idea, you just hoped it would go your way. And I guess it did, now you do know. Congratulations. Hope you're happy now.

And then he'd leave Batman gaping.

[bestkiboo]

#DestructionTSAMSAU TIME!!

So this is basically TSAMS but In a different dimension, and it's almost more like the future, but with differences

Nexus is defeated, Dark Sun is hiding somewhere

Ruin is also no where to be found

Monty and Earth are married already, and they got a daughter, Ema for short, full is Emantie.

Basically my OC is there too, People all over the worlds OC's are there, fat oc, celestial OC, that's why I can draw anyone's oc there in the comics!

Kiboo created Tonsix being built like an animatronic, but simply gave Nano machine to him and star power without him knowing.

And It's called Destruction TAMS AU because, Destruction.. BIG DESTRUCTION..already happened before Tonsix was born. Tonsix purpose was

to.. protect the celestials, that's why we gave him nano machine and star power. But Kiboo didn't tell him he was made out of nano machine, and the

star power because she wants him to develop in his life first before training and all that. The world ALMOST destroyed, Trying to fight the Dragon in

the recent episodes. Goliath tried to kill the dragon, failed, then LUNAR ALMOST DIED, In this dimension, Lunar, with the help of the astrals, they

defeated the dragon, that's why Dark Sun is hiding somewhere now. But even they had victory, A LOT OF DESTRUCTION HAPPENED DURING THE

PROCESS, A lot of plants died, because the Wither storm dragon died, all the Wither shards lost their power, so. Sun- got weaker, because he felt all

of it. Took him a while to recover. Well, let's say, Lunar did almost die during dragon battle with the astrals, And dude was badly injured on the leg.

Meanwhile Sun, uh.. Dealt with the most trauma still.

(Eclipse and Puppet's dimension)

Eclipse and Puppet tho- isn't much thing change there, well say Evelyn there is dead, Sun and Moon didn't seperate still, Eclipse became better

friends with Moon

Monty and Earth are married for, let's say about 2 years, and she really wanted a child,

So Moon and Solar as usual, built Emantie for them with their likings

Dark Sun is long gone, not dead but like, has different plans for different worlds

The creator, hasn't been heard of for years after the battle, maybe still plotting, who knows.

[the-lark-ascending69]

Any headcanons for the "Vickie instead of Eddie" AU?

Thank you sm for asking im so excited abt this au

In one hand I feel like I'm just genderswapping Eddie, or replacing him with an OC, because we know so little about Vickie that I'd be mostly making things up, so in order to avoid that I want to take a moment to properly analyze what we have on Vickie so far:

She's in band.

She volunteers to make food for the homeless

She feels selfish for complaining about her boyfriend with everything going on

She rambles when nervous, apparently, just like Robin.

She likes Fast Times and left her boyfriend over it, because he said it had no plot (possibly indicates a deeper understanding of movies)

It's little but I think it'll do. What I want to focus on is her kindness and selflessness, which already sets her apart from Eddie. Not that I think Eddie is particularly selfish, but "kind" isn't the first word to come to mind when you want to describe him.

However, in order for the AU to work, we need to translate some Eddie Traits, or Eddie Situations, onto Vickie, those being:

A reason for her to be accused of Chrissy's murder.

A reason for her not to go to the police.

A reason for the town to fear her.

Living in the trailing park, near Max's trailer.

Some loose connection to the Hawkins Crew to explain why they even care to dig deeper into the case.

The obvious connection to draw there would be Robin's crush - she notices when Vickie doesn't show up at school the next day, she talks to Steve about it, Steve dismisses it as her skipping school, etc. One interesting thing to work with is Robin's tendency to both project on other people and idealize them, which is very present in her book and podcast. She thinks she can just "observe" people and make a perfect image of them in her head, often based on her own biases, despite reality being different. She did this when she was 15, so idk of she'd still do it at 18, but I do think she idealizes Vickie a little, even in the show - she calls her the girl of her dreams without knowing her, for fuck's sake.

So now she's making up explanations as to why Vickie couldn't possibly have killed Chrissy when Max shows up and tells them she saw her running away from the crime scene. Everyone is confused as to why Robin keeps defending her despite not knowing a thing about her. She later asks Steve if she was too obvious ("Maybe a little obvious," he says "but they probably still think we're secretly dating or whatever, so you're good for now").

Now, a reason for Vickie to be accused of Chrissy's murder... I have a few ideas:

A) They were friends, and she was with her when she died (only explanation as to why she wouldn't tell the police is that she killed her).

B) She was a drug dealer, much like Eddie, and Chrissy went to her (most interesting scenario in my opinion. The juxtaposition of "cute petite girl" and "drug dealer" is very sweet to me, and it would really defy Robin's expectations).

C) She was a rumored queer, and the persecution has a strong homophobic edge to it. They only think she killed her because she's a lesbian (which is pretty much the same as a man in their eyes), and she didn't go to the police because she knew they'd think she did it.

I like B and C, I'm going with those.

So, Robin insists this couldn't possibly be, and Dustin is like "dude, she ran from the police. From the police, man" ("to be fair, I think Nancy did that like a fifty times", Steve says), and Max will say something like "actually, there is something", [insert peculiar observation + plausible alternate expalantion as to what that might mean and how it could make Vickie innocent]. More focused on figuring out whether or not this is Upside Down related or not, the Hawkins crew begin looking for Vickie, find her at Reefer Rick's etc. She doesn't react violently like Eddie did - she's small and meek and curled into a corner, crying softly. Robin finds her, and talks to her. Things unravel from there.

Idk how different the story would be. Vickie wouldn't die, for starters, because part of the point in doing this is creating a complex love interest for Robin. Another thing to take into account would be Vickie not being confirmed queer until the very end. Keep Robin on her toes. She has no idea whether or not they're just ugly rumors, and honestly she just feels worse throwing herself at her with the entire town calling her a murderous dyke, stalking poor teenage girls.

Her personality is entirely different from Eddie's too. While Eddie is loud, selfish, cowardly and likes to be an asshole to kids, Vickie is kind and sweet and treats kids very well. She becomes friends with Max and Lucas and always checks on them. Being in band, she's been to all of Lucas' games, so she's seen his progress, she knows he's great. And being neighbors with Max means she's knocked on her door with a cacerole in her hands whenever Max's mom wasn't there for the night - she figured Max might be hungry. They don't know how to feel about the drugs thing, but they like her.

I think it would be nice to make her... not as similar to Robin in personality. I wouldn't make her as talkative or rambly, rather, I'd make her introspective and introverted. Soft-spoken. Also, with a lot of trauma. Something something mom also sold drugs, got arrested, now she keeps doing this to survive because she has no other way to make money + she probably has debts, etc. Give her a more melancholic edge. I think that would be quite fitting.

She and Robin develop a friendship through the season, getting together somewhere in S5.

[alexilulu]

GAMES I PLAYED OF THE YEAR 2023, #2

(Previously: #1)

Razzies Award Runner-Up For Most Baffling Game Of 2023: Star Wars Jedi: Survivor (Respawn Entertainment)

(I know, I thought the colon was after Star Wars, too)

I didn’t know where Respawn would go after Fallen Order. I mean, obviously, they had to make more of it, they made a pretty damn competent video game. Fallen Order has a certain panache for combat, the feeling of being one dude against an army never being more clear than the fourth time I get domed by a Stormtrooper with a rocket launcher because I was too busy parrying the melee guy he’s gonna murder in the backblast to remember to force push it away in time. Playing on Jedi Master actually made me feel the same way that Dark Souls did, a feat so rare in the space now that we’ve expanded the universe of Soulslike beyond all comprehension that it was actually delightful to eat shit to some of those bosses.

Mostly.

But the ending of that game gave me so much joy that I couldn’t really fathom a second entry, at first. Sure, the expansion of the post-Order 66 era of Star Wars is continuing under the new leadership, but it’s a fairly small era (17 years, just about, thanks to the whole “Luke and Leia born after Order 66” thing). How much room do they have to play here, really? And what could really be told now, beyond the continued adventures of Cal Kestis and BD-1? 

Well…

They came up with something. It was an idea they had, all right. But maybe it should have stayed on the drawing board. 

Okay, if we’re gonna talk about this, I have to get this off my chest first. I’m a Star Wars dweeb.My favorite Star Wars movie is the Last Jedi, because of how it muddies the waters and says ‘hey, the Jedi were an anachronism in their own time, and the world has moved on’ and ‘the lines of war are not so clean in the modern era’ and ‘fuck, that shot of the hyperdrive crash was so sick’. My favorite Star Wars game is Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords (Obsidian Entertainment)! I’m not like other girls! 

And I have strong opinions about the Post-Revenge timeline, or more specifically, how many Jedi survive Order 66. For me, this comes down to a thing I find really interesting in media, and how the world works: How people find direction when they aren’t given any way to go. 

Post-Revenge, the Empire is ascendant, having just won the fake war and successfully crushed every element of dissent in the galaxy under a swift military expansion that has given the evil man in power, George Bush Jr With A Skin Condition, unlimited power to rule the galaxy with an iron fist. The world is different now than under the Republic, and everywhere you turn, the Empire looms. What do you do to meaningfully oppose something you disagree with that is omnipresent and powerful beyond reckoning, besides oppose it and die trying to do anything at all?

Ultimately,There’s a lot of hay to be made here, but we’ll keep it simple so this doesn’t go crazy. The Jedi who survive Order 66 issue is pretty cut and dry, if you’re a movie purist: Yoda says that Luke will become the last Jedi in the galaxy when he dies in RotJ. It’s pretty simple! No more Jedi! Last of his kind, etc etc etc. But it’s been 30 years since that movie aired, and we’re a few hundred pieces of Star Wars media away from where it started, Legends canon or no. Some of them are even primary canon now, like Ahsoka Tahno, the erstwhile apprentice of Anakin Skywalker.

But how many Jedi are alive just in Fallen Order? And how many more make it to Jedi Survivor?

We have Cal Kestis, our ginger protagonist, a padawan who survived Order 66 with his Master’s lightsaber and hid for a decade to grow up, get found out and run around the galaxy fucking up. There’s Cere, the new master he finds along the way. There’s Trilla, the fallen apprentice of Cere, now Second Sister. There’s Ninth Sister, the big hulking one who you fight all of twice and survives the game. There’s a one-note fallen Master on Dathomir, who turns up out of nowhere and gets chumped. And there’s Merrin, the Dathomiri Nightsister who practices Magick (the k is important) using the Force, so she counts. And Vader comes in for a splashy send-off to the game in a brutally scary no-win fight and escape sequence in which you are carefully reminded why that guy is the scariest motherfucker in the galaxy. That makes 7. 

A bit more than the Last Jedi, eh?

Ultimately, this is a victim of the fact that they’re making a video game. You can fight stormtroopers with cortosis shock batons all day, but if you’re playing a Jedi game, you want to cross sabers with another Jedi/Sith. It’s just the order of the day. It makes sense! The Jedi fights in Fallen Order are good! I dismissed the one-note Master but he actually had a good fight in a Dathomiri temple that felt good to go back to every time i got fucking dumpstered.

It makes things more fun to have a Jedi thrown into this time of lawlessness and oppression, where the strong are taking the chance to crush the weak with the Empire’s tacit blessing; raiders on the Outer Rim are bleeding the territories dry, often at the Empire’s behest. Throwing the tattered Jedi remnants into that world makes sense instinctively with the world they’ve made, and with the influences Star Wars draws on.

The average person knows by now that Star Wars is drawing equally from Westerns that influenced George Lucas, but also the samurai movies coming out of Japan that influenced those Westerns. A world of fallen morals and people barely surviving gets so much more textured when the Last Good Samurai enters the equation. Putting someone with an unflinching moral code in a bad position and telling them not to blink is fun storytelling! Watching them contort themselves into knots to survive it is so fun! We love that shit! Hell, I love that shit, as much as I’m complaining about it!

So, in Jedi Survivor, we have Cal, Cere returns, Ninth Sister finally dies, Merrin returns with gusto (great expanded role for her here, though it baffles me that she’s straight), the High Republic fallen Jedi Dagan Gera (more on him later, but he dies), Eno Cordova (was dead in the last game, but turns out he wasn’t, but then he dies again, so okay), and Bode Akuna, the final deuteragonist-to-antagonist of the game. And Darth Vader again, in a what feels like obligatory role where he fights Cere to a draw. So…7, again. But…

The Hidden Path debuts here (OKAY, LOOK, the Hidden Path debuts in Obi-Wan Kenobi, the Disney+ show. But I fucking hope you didn’t watch that. I did. And I regret every minute of it I spent watching it), an underground railroad for Jedi. It’s basically not referred to beyond that Cere and Eno are running a cell of it and that there are other cells, but it DOES mean that there are enough other Jedi who survived that they are actively forming whisper networks to get Jedi out of bad places and into the dilapidated ruins they were meant to be living in (it’s their native environment). 

So we have 7 + (1±X, where X is the number of other Jedi in the galaxy, minus already-named characters) Jedi in Jedi Survivor. So basically, Palpatine is a fucking rube who didn’t even get his perfect felling blow right, I guess? So…not great, but fine. It’s…acceptable. The number even goes down significantly more in this one, because 5 of those original 7 in Fallen survive, but only 4 survive in Jedi Survivor! It’s a miracle, we killed 1 net Jedi! Maybe I shouldn’t be so hard on Palpatine, they’re clearly a fucking pain to make die for real.

Anyway. This is all besides how I feel about the actual plot of Jedi Survivor. 

Yeah.

The plot…is kind of stupid. Cal Kestis is working with Saw Gerrera, the Partisans (faction of the Resistance, not yet the Rebellion, natch) figure who went on to use a weird tentacle monster to brainfuck Riz Ahmed in Rogue One and then died when they fired the first Death Star test shot at him. He’s stealing info, and his op goes bad and all his boys get murdered besides newfound buddy Bode Akuna, a jetpacking charming rogue with two pistols and a lot of chest. Cal goes and gets into some hijinks with his old buddy who used to fly his ship until everyone parted under mysterious circumstances a few years ago (after the end of Fallen Order, when they swore to find as many potential Jedi as they could together). 

This is where the High Republic intrudes. Ancient ruins on the planet they’re on point towards a long-forgotten Jedi presence on this planet, with hints leading to another planet hidden in a nearby nebula that is considered unnavigable and a death trap. They learn that that planet was an abandoned Jedi temple in the High Republic, where Dagan Gera fought for a Jedi temple on a fount of Force power to be built until it was mysteriously raided by an unknown force that somehow also got to the lost planet. Cal wakes up Dagan Gera, who literally turns evil in front of you and runs off to complete his centuries-old evil plot to…go back to that planet and just live there?

A lot of this story is about the toll being A Survivor takes on you. Cal watches a bunch of really good buddies he totally knows a lot about die in the tutorial level on Coruscant, and he’s still got all his old hangups about surviving his master, being a Jedi in a galaxy ruled by the Sith, yadda yadda. He’s lost his drive to fight the Empire, having summarily abandoned working for Saw Gerrera in the interest of just taking a break, and into his lap falls the ultimate leave forever button in the form of this lost planet. He sees it and he can’t help but think “hey, I did my part, I sacrificed a lot for the cause, and I’m done”. 

Bode Akuna agrees on this! He’s a tough guy and he’s got a tough daughter and a dead wife and he just doesn’t want to deal with any of this anymore. He wants to bring his daughter home and create a life with her away from all this Empire shit. It gets where it wants to pretty quick here: This planet Cal found is the ultimate chance to just say No to everything and give it all up. Just live a clean, simple life away from it all, forever.

It’s an interesting thing, sort of. Fallen Order is a game so concerned with survival, that Jedi Survivor basically has to be about finding any meaning at all in a galaxy ruled by evil. It feels like it’s actually got something to say here…but it doesn’t, really. 

The turning point of the game is roughly ¾ of the way through, when Dagan Gera is defeated and you claim the mcguffin that will help you fly to Treasure Planet. But before that happens, you meet Cere and Eno and learn about the Hidden Path, the selflessness of the non-Jedi who are fighting to help them survive. And Cal, he’s a Jedi through and through, for better or worse. So he says to Bode, hey, we’re going to turn this planet into a safe haven for the Hidden Path, and we’ll bring everyone we can here to create a stronghold against the Empire.

This is when Bode (every time I think about his name, i think about (INSERT PHOTO OF BODE.JPG HERE) reveals that he is a former deep cover infiltrator Jedi who was undercover when Order 66 started, who avoided every bit of the Empire that chased him with stealth and subterfuge, until an Imperial Security Bureau he worked with outed him and he became their pet Jedi to do evil missions with. So he’s compromised every moral he has to survive, and will do anything to take his daughter back from the ISB and flee this hellish galaxy with her, so that she can be raised safe.

He’s the Jedi Survivor, not you (I literally said out loud to myself OH, HE’S THE JEDI SURVIVOR as he had his big heel turn speech).

This is when Bode kills Eno Cordova, takes the mcguffin, and flies there with his daughter after you have a big temper tantrum about it and unlock the power of the dark side for yourself a little bit. So you go hunt him down after some double mcguffin reacharound bullshit to get there, and you tell his daughter some nice platitudes and Merrin takes her out of the room so you can put him down like a dog.

The end of the game is him burning on a pyre while you, Merrin and his daughter watch. 

Ultimately, it was a game that at least had some kind of a semblance of a full story ready from beginning to end. It had plenty of things to do (the collectible quotient was WAY higher this time, to its detriment) and the newly added stances, a crossguard lightsaber that is straight up just Kylo Ren and a blaster-and-saber stance that i spent 100% of the game playing once acquired, were great fun to play around with.

I just don’t think it was very good, is all. I don’t know what in god’s name the third Star Wars will be, but I know it will be fought with lightsabers and blasters. 

(sorry. Sorry. I’m trying to delete it)

[adanaac]

Could I ask about your OC's? Specifically Ophicucus and Tsuru, I love how majestic Ophi is drawn and Tsuru fascinates me both with the concept and also how lovely you have illustrated him.

I hope you are well, and thank you again for helping me with my questions o7.

Sincerely HMAD.

oh good i get to talk about my son!!

my blorbo my beloved my babygirl he means everything to me

i made him in 2017 so hes sort of grown up with me (or i've grown up and realised things about him that i couldn't have when i was younger. i have so many complicated feelings abt this that i made a short comic about it last year)

to preface this im not a great writer dont expect good writing from me lol all i have is my personal experience and stealing tropes from stories i like

(got a lot to say so its all going under the cut. also a lot of death mention)

So. who is this dude

Tsuru (not his real name in-story, i havent come up with one im happy with), 18 years old, a ghost

he has a little sister, Ori, 15, who was meant to be my sona but then i just drew him more and like drawing him more anyway

first 2 drawings i ever did of him. he was based off natori natsume yuujinchou at this point, i dont remember why or if i even liked natori that much, but i remember distinctly hes based off him

u may have noticed he sort of looks older in my older art. this is because first of all art style drift lol but also as ive gotten older ive figured out that 18 isnt actually that old.

theres also a black haired version of him (two actually) its basically something like this ⬇️

important to know that everything about this dude is a convoluted metaphor

i lovingly summarize white tsuru as "people pleaser" and black tsuru as "nihilist prick" in my head and those are the things consistent throughout all the AU versions of him

(important differences only to me) alive tsuru doesnt act like black tsuru at all thats just his warped self perception (he also doesnt act exactly like white tsuru either)

also alive tsuru has black eyes and the shortest hair, black tsuru has blue eyes and slightly longer hair (also white tsuru is slightly taller than both of them)

if they all existed at the same time they would hate each other on sight but fortunately (unfortunately?) he is just 1 dude with issues

the general vibe is white tsuru is the "yippee floaty trickster" brand of ghost and black tsuru is the sort of ghost in horror media that stands just outside your field of view in the darkness dripping with blood

for the longest time only white haired tsuru was a "character", "black haired tsuru" existed just as his corpse at most, a footnote

but over the past 2 years ive figured that hes actually really fun to draw and play with, and in a different way than white tsuru

(wait fuck isnt this just abe trio. i do always almost accidentally draw tsuru when im trying to draw haruaki.... fuck.....)

(ive had tsuru for long enough that i just keep tacking details from my fav characters onto him.....)

halls smp

so ive been on this minecraft roleplay server called halls smp with other artists for the past 2 years, theres a new season of it every few months with a different theme each time to keep things fresh and ive just been making AU versions of tsuru for it so ive had a lot of opportunity to think about him

season 1 - halloween - jiangshi tsuru

this one is almost entirely unchanged from his base characterization because i didnt want to rp too much and also didnt know there would be future seasons at this point (also basically after the first day i gave up on being called "tsuru" bc its too hard to pronounce and everyone called me canada anyway)

same basic story, guy dies and theres now a white haired version of him (actually this is the same for all the AUs). in fact im pretty sure the black haired version of this one is exactly base alivetsuru. basically what ive been interested in exploring is different kinds of death, the events leading up to it, and what kind of person he becomes afterwards (but also in equal amounts im interested in making fun designs and playing minecraft and fucking around)

(this feels like the start of the beginners guide...)

i associate him with doves and at the time, tarot card 18: the moon, but in retrospect i now think he's card 0: the fool.

season 2 - winter - ishmael

guy who died at sea and eaten by a interdimensional whale and got isekaied. loosely conceptually based off moby dick, although i havent actually read it LOL but i did spend a week reading up on drowning and hypothermia

strangely, his death didnt create a white haired version of him, perhaps because he didnt have anything in life to give up his identity and replace it with. (and also remember the hair color doesnt actually mean dead/alive)

im only calling him ishmael now in retrospect, at the time he was just tsuru/canada

while designing him i had the biggest crisis bc i didnt want him to look to much like this old old oc i had (pic 1) but then i sucked it up and went with it anyway

i never got around to drawing it but his fingers are black from frostbite thats why he wears gloves all the time.

hes one of my favorite iterations of tsuru he looks so mad or upset all the time it makes me want to tease him, and also i think the grey skin and eyebags are very cute

i associate him with whales and tarot card 18: the moon

season 3 - golden grove - fox tsuru

honestly i think this is my favorite design of him i kinda popped off. i think im just a lot more comfortable working with warm colors. and also i associate white tsuru with foxes anyway (black tsuru is totally a catboy btw) (why is he not associated with cranes if his name is tsuru you ask?? bc cranes are hard to draw next question. he did start out based off cranes tbf, thats where the white hair and the tallness comes from)

dead fox possessing his dead human friend's body (although thats only the most literal interpretation of events; in all these iterations there's only ever been 1 person) the white tsurus are mostly interested in "moving on", whatever that means to each of them

btw my banner on this blog is him

hes sort of a set with s2 tsuru to me, mostly bc theyre the ideals that "white tsuru" and "black tsuru" hold taken to the extremes, and also theyre on opposite ends of the "hates people hates talking" and "loves to talk and mess with people" scale

anyway. hes tarot card 10: wheel of fortune to me

season 4 - wild west - mirage

the desert dragon, mirage. this is the season i started giving them actual names that arent "tsuru" and putting actual thought into the story lol previously it was just vibes-based character design. i have a short thing written about him thats meant to be the script for a comic, but i never got around to drawing it.

a sandworm-esque dragon that got tired of being a dragon and took up a passing witch's offer to give him a human form. this is all a metaphor i think. he has longer hair bc i wanted to spice things up a little

(also i consider this a form of death bc he left behind a giant sandworm/dragon skeleton somewhere in the desert)

the mirage-dragon thing comes from the shen 蜃 (which is used in the chinese word for mirage, 海市蜃楼 haishi shenlou, literally translating to "ocean city and shen's castle"). it's a clam-like dragon that produces foam that creates mirages over the ocean.

if u read "even if you slit my mouth", this is what the "shinkiro" or "shin" in recent chapters is. (i had one of those "smug because i already know all about the mythological creature a story is referencing" moments, which i also had with the four gods in yohaji bc i used to translate a game that mentioned them too)

isnt it romantic in a way? that the two places mirages are most known for happening are the ocean and the desert.

i dont have too much art of him because around this time i was uhhh (checks calendar) got back into yohaji and got consumed by it for a couple months lol (can u even blame me. it was july to september that was when like chapter 91 came out lol)

an earlier version of his design that i didnt end up using but i still really like this art

hes tarot card 9: the hermit to me

season 5 - fairytales/medieval - ophiuchus

NO FUCKING WAY YOURE NEVER GOING TO BELIEVE THIS for this one i actually ironed out what kind of people the black haired and white haired versions of him are. and also specifically this one isnt black tsuru but alive tsuru

i have a short poem thing about him, to summarize its like so many other fairytales about grateful animals granting their saviors something, but it doesnt end well for anyone

hes based off ophiuchus and asclepius of course, but also a lot of other snake stories in general, like the lindwurm and baishezhuan

to reiterate, for none of these stories do i consider there to ever actually have been 2 separate people, its always just 1 fucked up guy

i also sort of consider him to be a set with mirage, for both being serpents, and also for being "black tsuru whose personality is like white tsuru" and "white tsuru whose personality is like black tsuru", thereby codifying for myself that to him, someone who's stuck in his own head a lot, what matters most to him is his ideals, what all his actions are in pursuit of

he's tarot card 12: the hanged man to me

bonus: dnd character - alba

i also have a version of him i play for dnd, named alba to match with my party who all have color themed names. a halfling ranger who's very small and very loud. except he has amnesia and cant remember anything from before he was 12 (hes around 18 now according to him), including that he's actually a changeling who just transformed into a halfling to seem older than he is to work at a bar and nearly died in a bar fight.

(if you spend as much time fretting over semantics as me, you may note that changelings are medium sized and cannot transform into halflings which are small sized, for which my explanation is that he's been in halfling form since he was a kid, and after the amnesia he thought he actually was a halfling. this is also why his hair is white btw bc changelings have white hair. pre-amnesia in his "actual" halfling transformation he had black hair. i care too much about semantics but hey isnt dnd the semantics game anyway?)

anyway congrats alba for being the only version of tsuru that hasn't outright "died"!! if only because dnd has actual rules and i can't pull my usual death-ghost nonsense as easily!!!

hes very ship of theseus to me, all versions of him are. what makes up a person? what defines them? is it their face, their appearance, their name? their personality, their memories, their ideals? if you slowly replace each of those, one at a time, with a copy thats very similar to the original, at what point are you a different person?

as thanks for reading all of this i'll reveal what some of the metaphors are, the core of who tsuru, as a character, is to me. maybe this is fairly obvious, but all the death and personality weirdness stuff is a convoluted metaphor for depression and autism, as well as the experience of reading the things you've written years ago, seeing old photos and others talking about who you were years ago and finding that person wholly unfamiliar, that you understand the thought process of that person no more than you would a stranger's, as a result of having taken apart your identity and replaced it piece by piece with things from people you like more than yourself.

im always scared of scrutinizing tsuru too hard because he's just a weird reflection of myself, and i think i'll only be able to write a version of him thats more of a "whole person" once i figure that out for myself. the only way you see your own reflection is through a mirror after all, a flattened 2D surface.

haha this got kinda weird and depressing and personal at the end (mostly bc ive been writing this in the middle of the night, its now 4am)

after seeing my soul laid bare like this, if theres one takeaway, i think its pretty obvious why i'm so enamored by the parts of yohaji that i talk about often (huh wasnt this a post about my oc why did it become about yohaji)

oh yeah i just realised u probably also wanted to hear more about my yohaji version of tsuru specifically. honestly theres not really more to it i just like drawing him in situations. like of course the same themes apply but i just like drawing this dude thats 90% the reason hes my sona. like heres a pokemon au of him i drew recently bc i wanted to draw them as kids and also as pokemon gijinkas

anyway thats all. not really bc i could go on and on about him but this is way too long and also way too personal at this point. i think about him a disproportionate amount, i only have 2 other ocs i remotely care about and the extent of my thoughts for those guys is "i think hes fun 👍"

this has probably also been like, the 3rd most comprehensive description of tsuru that ive made, 1st being the thoughts in my head and 2nd being the past 5 years worth of DMs with my friend who i talk about tsuru with

(why was this sort of structured like the beginners guide. if youve seen the beginners guide tell me if im right or delusional. if u havent, go watch a playthrough of it, have an existential crisis, and then afterwards tell me)

[bagheerita]

twenty questions for fic writers

tagged by @tiltingheartand thanks!! ❤

how many works do you have on ao3? 93

what's your total ao3 word count? 1,670,696 (I've finished re-posting (almost) all of my old stuff from FFN and AFF)

what fandoms do you write for? At the moment: Stargate Atlantis Before that: MCU/Avengers I have dipped my toes in all over, but by number of fics the next two most prominent past fandoms are: Inuyasha & Mercedes Lackey’s Valdemar

top five fics by kudos: 1. Nemo (SGA) 2. Nyteridalatry (SGA) 3. One and One and One is Three (MCU) 4. Regina Donum (SGA) 5. Your Prison is Walking Through This World All Alone (MCU)

do you respond to comments? Yes, always (unless the person is reading through and commenting on multiple chapters in a fic. Then I usually only reply to the ones where I feel like I have something to say instead of all of them). The depth of my reply depends on my mental energy that day.

what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Technically Beast of Venery probably wins this (SGA fic where Sheppard has, to put it lightly, a very bad day)

what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Can I go with Harbored (the actual ending of the series that began with Beast of Venery)? In general, I love happy endings, so I write a lot of them. But maybe Harbored feels like a brighter dawn because of the previous darkness.

do you get hate on fics? No, not really. Thankfully! I get weird comment sometimes, like “why is everyone gay?” (which comment ignored the mostly-straight-reading bisexual relationship in that story), and “it’s so lame that you didn’t finish this story” (the story is clearly tagged and noted as abandoned, and I explained that the series it was part of only existed at all because of the comments and interest I’d gotten on the first installment, so when the comments dried up so did the series)

do you write smut? Yes, with varying levels of skill and interest

craziest crossover: Um, of the things that are posted… Conversations Beyond the Edge of the Galaxy, where Shigure Souma, Angel (the vampire), and Rogue (from X-Men) meet at a bar and talk.

have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I know of

have you ever had a fic translated? No, because that would be too awesome

have you ever co-written a fic before? No, though technically Eos and I are credited as coauthors on Aubade (SGA), because she did the art and I did the writing. (Her cover art is really just fantastically beautiful!)

all time favourite ship? Dude* I vibe with/other dude I vibe with/possibly a third dude I vibe with + story that writes them just right + I was exactly in the mood for this situation today = best ship (*dude is gender neutral)

what's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? So many…. But there's this one AU I have that I want to finish, it's a multiverse John/Todd/Rodney. Chunks of it are mostly written, but there are these OCs that I was planning to kill off and as I developed the one character I made her black and a lesbian so now I'm like "well crap I can't bury my gays, I want her to be happy with her girlfriend, even though her girlfriend also dying was a huge plot point!" So it's back to the drawing board while I decide if I can get away with inserting a time loop where I kill another character but he's not actually dead (because it's the time-traveled version of him that dies, right? But I can't decide how to make this not a paradox).

what are your writing strengths? I’m good at editing. I love writing absolute shit and then tearing it apart and fixing it. And I think I’m good at blocking? Scenes that don't describe the setting very well confuse me, so I work to make that clear when I'm writing.

what are your writing weaknesses? Describing characters. Since it's a fic I tend to assume that everyone know what everyone looks like, which doesn't fly as well with OCs... 😅

thoughts on dialogue in another language? If it’s dialogue that the reader is supposed to understand it should be written in the same language as the fic. (Or notated in a way that the reader can access a translation. There are cool skins for this on AO3.) If it’s in another language, I had better not need to know what it says, because I do not have time to look it up.

first fandom you wrote in? OT Star Wars

favourite fic you've written? I really don’t think I could pick just one. Mostly I have favorite moments, rather than favorite fics. But some contenders might be: With Autumn Closing In (MCU, frostiron) Ivory Fanged (Kiesha’ra series, Danica/Zane) Oh, Talk Not to Me of a Name Great in Story (SGA, john/todd) Semper ad Meliora (SGA, Rodney & Todd) A Dram of Sweet is Worth a Pound of Sorrow (SGA, Michael/OC)

(I'm not going to link any stories bc it's late, and my AO3 is linked at the top of my tumblr if you're interested)

NPT: @adriankyte-writes @judgeverse @aintgonnatakethis @darklysnarky @anonmadsci @lord-aldhelm @annwayne @anomalousrobot @only-in-december