#this scene made me unwell ok

[phoenixmetaphor]

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based on @thebrandywine ‘s [pull me under]

unglazed @ ao3 (requires login)

[angelsdean]

dean studies, figure 1: dean as the soldier

when you’re having a crisis of conscience but your father-god said you did good so you let all the doubts slip away because what are you if not desperate to please, desperate for praise, and starving for approval. 

[moonrisecoeur]

IM BACK CUZ IM MENTALLY UNWELL OK. and yes you’re the best sub Leon writer 😏🥱 and yes I liked it, SITTING ON HIS FACE? 😍🥱

I’m so sorry for blasting ur req box but YOURE AN ACTUALLY GOOD SUB LEON WRITER SO can you blame me? concept: idk why but re4 Leon is so free use coded and so imagine he is on a mission with a new assigned partner but she’s an asshole to him (“fuck off man, I can do it myself, “I don’t need your help”, “you’re too nice and gonna be taken advantage of 😐”, etc. You get the gist) and his goofy ass just tryna be nice and helpful, cuz this is leon we are talking about. But the fun part ⁉️ they have cameras installed in the hideout they are saying at for security purposes. But ofc, Leon always tries to check on reader to make sure she’s ok - even if she’s an asshole to him. AND YK WHAT READER DOES 😭 she’s way too horny and just goes at it, girl got a masturbation problem on god. Every night. One night - wrong time and place - Leon opens his laptop to see the cameras making sure she’s ok AND HELP HE SEES HER … yk. And he feels guilty like he shouldn’t watch but he does anyways. And this goes on for weeks. Until one night he’s sick and tired of her always being so mean and he accidentally lets it slip that he’s been watching her LOL AND SHES LIKE UHM BOY WHAT 🙄⁉️ and he tries to play it off like “I didnt mean to” but like, my brother in Christ… you’ve been watching every night for weeks 🤨 wdym you didn’t mean to? ANYWAYS LONG STORY SHORT SHE PUNISHES HIM AND HEAVYYYY ON THE FREE USE THING. Love you bae 😘

i made a couple minor changes just for convenience :) fem reader she/her pronouns!

also i didn’t write the smex scene IM SORRY but i have been working on this all day and i need to get to other asks but i promise i’ll write some more free use in the future because it’s so smexy

-

"look, i know you don't like me-"

"oh? really? tell me what you think you know, kennedy," you scowl at him, and though it spooks him just a little, he tries to seem unphased.

he frowns, not hurt by your words but definitely concerned that you'll make a bad partner, "you don't need to be this hostile. we're allies. we're supposed to have each other's backs."

"right..." your voice echos, and leon knows that if it came down to it, you wouldn't protect him, wouldn't save him, would barely help him. he's practically on his own for this mission, just has an extra body with him to shoot at the bad guys.

it hurts, to some degree, because even without knowing you well, and even with you being cold and rude to him, he knows he'd come to your rescue in a heartbeat. something about him feels fond of you, even though in your entire time knowing leon kennedy, you haven't said one nice thing to him.

he thinks that maybe he likes that you've never been nice to him. he doesn't really know what to do with that thought.

-

leon is proved wrong.

despite the harshness of your words, you come to his rescue, fighting off the villager who almost decapitated him with an axe like both of your lives depend on it (because they do).

he watches you fight nervously, but when you come out on top, aside from the gash wound you take to the hip, he feels his heart skip a beat.

"this is what happens when you hurt my partner," you groan, holding your side, trying to speak through the pain even though leon can see the blood seeping between your fingers.

you whisper something in your victim's ear, something leon can't quite make out, before you kill him. leon wonders what it was briefly. he decides it doesn’t matter.

you both breathe a sigh of relief, but it's short lived as you collapse to the ground. you saved him. you got hurt saving him.

"here, let me help you," he mutters, coming over to you, not even stopping to ask if you want his help because he knows you'll say no, "stop fighting me. you're hurt and i need to patch you up."

the pain is agonizing, but even through gritted teeth and tense breaths, you push through it. he has to commend you a little bit, you're tougher than you look.

but when you try to push his hand away, claiming "i'm fine, kennedy," he sees the struggle in your face, hears the hurt in your voice. his heart seems to stop. he's worried, "i can do it myself, you don't have to- fuck, dude, i don't need your help-."

"-just relax, okay? i got you..”

you don't have the strength to push him away, but you know you shouldn't anyway, so you just slouch back against the wall and try to breathe, "fine, just fuckin... hurry up."

"i'm just trying to take care of you. we're partners, right? i gotta look out for you," he smiles, trying to lighten the mood even slightly. he wishes that this would be the time the barriers come down, that those skyscraper walls that prevented him from coming any closer to you emotionally could come crashing down, if only for a moment.

"you don't have to do anything. you're choosing to put yourself in danger to help me," you groan as you lean back, looking up at the ceiling, "suprised that no one's tried to take advantage of your willingness to help before."

"someone did," he mutters annoyedly, focusing more on the wound then it being your wound, on your body. his eyebrows, almost naturally furrowed from years of stress, somehow make his face even more sad to gaze upon. it's not that he's unattractive, far from it, but he's... worn. tired. a piece of your heart, no matter how far you keep away from him, aches in sympathy.

-

leon carries you back to the safe room, a hideout you both are using to rest and recover in while you plot your next move. he lays his jacket on the ground to at least give you something comfortable to lie on. you don't look comfortable, but he can't do anything else to help you.

he looks through his things, trying to concoct something that will at least make you feel a little bit better. he finds a first aid spray, and his heart jumps out of his chest in excitement. he uses it to take care of your wound, and waits for you to wake up from your unconscious state.

he decides to go back out, hoping to maybe find some other things to help you both on your mission. he knows you'll berate him for leaving on his own, risking his own life needlessly. but god if he didn't imagine what it would be like if he found something you could really use, and watch your eyes light up. even if you didn't like him, you'd be happy. he wants to see you smile, to praise him for a job well done.

he cringes at how pathetic it sounds, but he sets off either way, leaving you wrapped in his jacket with a note from him saying what he's doing.

-

he doesn't do it intentionally. at least... not the first time. genuinely, he just wanted to check up on you, make sure you were alive and breathing and safe. and you definitely were.

he doesn't know why its so hypnotizing, why he can't put his goddamn phone away with the stupid security app on it. of course it's you, though. you're hypnotizing.

he watches every pixel, every distorted view of you touching yourself in the safe room, obviously unaware that he could... see this. he's glad there's no audio, or else he'd be unable to control himself, even in an abandoned building surrounded by zombies. maybe its the years that haven hardened him, burned the fear out of his soul and numbed him to the presence of those things, but he doesn't feel anything but uncontrollable desire right now.

have you been doing it the whole time? you both had spilt off from each other multiple times, and he would almost be upset at the idea that every time he was fighting for his life and barely, barely winning that fight each time, you were getting off a couple hundred feet from him in another room... if it wasn't so fucking hot to watch you masturbate.

he keeps watching until he notices that you're having an orgasm, body twitching and your chest heaving up and down as you take deep breathes. it's so fucking sexy, leon probably could have cum on the spot if he watched anymore.

-

you keep doing it. he keeps watching it. over the course of the mission (of course he had to be stuck on a long, secluded recon mission with you of all people) he's watched you too many times. he doesn't think he has enough fingers to count how many times, which either means he's been on this mission longer than he thought or you have a fucking addiction. he's almost kind of impressed at how efficient you are. takes you 10 minutes tops, and then you just get back up and keep on trucking? his sentimental, post-nut ass could never.

and, though you recovered from your wound, you haven't displayed any sense of gratitude for leon taking care of you when you passed out after getting hurt. not that he expects it, truthfully. you saved his life, he saved yours. you were even.

he just doesn't feel like he's broken any new ground. he feels like, if anything, you feel even further away, emotionally. he's about had it.

"hey, we need to talk," he says, ominously; he doesn't intend it to be so, "i understand you don't like me. it's fine. i don't even care anymore. but i am tired of you talking to me like i'm a pushover."

you look over at him, reloading your gun with a displeased look on your face. leon hates the inner urge he has to cave and apologize to you, as if his body would rather give up any sense of dignity he still has in favor of being slightly more tolerable to you.

"well? are you going to say something?"

you scoff, looking away, "didn't know you were so fucking sensitive, kennedy," and you turn around, ready to walk out, before he snaps, "this isn't a pleasure trip. sorry you're not having a good time."

"clearly you're having a good time with all the pleasure you're giving yourself while i'm trying not to die."

he stops. panicking. trying to think of how to spin the words he just said and make it not sound like he knew every tell you had when you were about to cum or exactly how you touch yourself in order to get yourself off quickly.

you stop as well. and you look back at him with this expression on your face that is completely unreadable.

maybe it wasn't the best move to reveal the only card he had left to play if it mean he would get this reaction out of you considering that, again, you so clearly do not like him.

... right?

"what... did you say, kennedy?" you ask, pure venom in your voice. it's not a question, you so clearly heard him correctly.

"i- i'm sorry, i didn't mean to say that-"

"have you been watching me?" you take a step closer, eyes boring into his soul so intensely he can't make eye contact. he has no way out of this situation. he feels out of breath, nervous, god why are you getting so close to him? "answer me, leon," not kennedy, leon, "have you been watching me masturbate?"

he looks up, trying to keep himself from making eye contact. he knows the second he looks into your eyes, he will be putty in your hands, free for you to mold into whatever you'd like. he knows you're not looking at him with distain like usual, it's something else.

something hungry.

"yeah," he breathes, barely getting the world out at all. you take a deep breath, as if you're debating what you're going to do.

"what you did was wrong, you see that, right?"

"yes, i know, but-"

you scoff, annoyed. god why in this moment, just inches away from you, you notice the moles on his neck, the angle of his jaw, the entrancing aura of his eyes. it's so damn distracting, and you have to pull yourself together, "but nothing. you watched me without my consent, you got off on it, didn't you?"

"god, you're making it sound so bad, i... i'm sorry, okay? how can i make it up to you?" he asks, trying so damn hard as always to please.

this is where you come to realize that maybe you didn't hate leon kennedy all this time. maybe you found yourself too comfortable, too at ease in his presence. maybe he was safe and sweet and gentle and it didn't sit right because nothing in a world with zombies and bioweapons and cults and parasites was gentle. but leon is.

you look down, considering your options, "i have an idea. you're free to refuse and we go back to before, and you get nothing from me. do you want to hear it?"

"sure?"

you take a breath, going for it, "i’ll be… blunt. if you couldn’t tell, i’m a bit.. insatiable. i need something to get myself off now that i’m getting bored of my own hands out here. you help me, and i’ll forgive you for watching me.”

his thoughts stop. he genuinely can’t put together a coherent thought, what did you mean? "are you.. are you fucking serious? you barely speak to me, every time you do speak to me you act like i'm the scum of the earth, you act like i'm not here when i saved your ass and carried you and patched you up, i-”

you cut him off with a kiss. it’s not gentle, it’s rough and messy and your fingers dig into the skin of his cheeks, leaving him red and breathless. he finally gets it. you don’t want him to help you, you want to use him.

he lets you push him down, pin his body to the wall as you kiss him breathless. he lets you dig your nails into his neck even if it hurts. he lets you touch and kiss him as rough or as gentle as you like. and you don’t like being gentle, clearly.

“use me,” he whispers between kisses, and when you pull away, eyeing him intently, as if urging him to explain himself, he does, “do whatever you want. just keep going until you’re satisfied. don’t… don’t hold back. whatever pleases you… i want that. i want to please you.”

“awh, you just want me to be happy with you, don’t you?” you coo at him, endeared by his selflessness. truly a good man in a bad world, “that’s all you’ve ever wanted, hm? for me to like you?”

his resolve cracks just a little bit more, “uhm, yeah…” he his voice is shaky, unsteady, and he just needs to give in.

“then you’re going to let me do this every single time in horny and need something to get myself off. i’m going to do whatever i want to you, and i’m not going to ask. you’re just going to let me. if you don’t, then we go right back to being enemies, and you really don’t want that, right?”

he stutters aimlessly, his knees going weak. he’d truly be done for if you weren’t hold him up with a strength he did not know you had.

and you just keep going, “i’m not going to ask or care if it’s a bad time. i want it to be inconvenient, uncomfortable, ill-timed. i want it to be permanently in your head that i can have you whenever i want you. that i can do whatever i want to you.”

“only i get to have you, got it?”

“g-got it,” he mutters weakly, feeling your hands on him, touching him in places he hasn’t been touched in a while. he didn’t realize how desperate he was.

“only i get to touch you, only i… get to fuck you.”

he nods helplessly.

“it’s too bad i didn’t bring a dildo in my bag when we set off for this mission, because i would so fuck you with it until you’re seeing stars and apologizing for going behind my back… but i suppose i’ll just have to satisfy myself with your cock…”

[shehungthemoon]

Just dumping my Ina Paha thoughts here. 🙃

First of all I did NOT know it was the 100th episode going into this, so i was very confused watching the montage at the end lol

I also had to click out and make sure I didn't click the wrong episode when the Pilot started playing at the beginning. When I heard Danny's voice on the phone instead of Hesse's I swear I got whiplash

It's filmed so well (bar where they reshot the pilot where Steve gets Danny on the phone instead of a dead dad, in which they literally forgot to put the same filter over the scene to make the stitching coherent) and I absolutely love the camera work they did with the white-room and the video projections. It felt very much a level above normal network television cinematography, especially the parts where Steve's going in and out of the hallucinations.

Steve finally FINALLY killing Wo-Fat was so cathartic, it should have happened ages ago but I'm willing to look past all the dumb ways he survived just to allow this incredible ending to his story.

Ina Paha gave me Kono doing... this. I owe Grace Park my whole life. Pls costuming department put her in hot pink again 💗

yes, it was a Steve episode. but Danny REALLY shone, first as the only resident Actual Detective figuring out what happened to Steve by the tire-tracks, rampaging through the compound steadily and efficiently and knocking people off without a pause, and then in Steve's mind shooting Hesse's kneecaps off?!?!?! That was CRAZY and probably not suppose to be as hot as it was and definitely made me want an ex-mobster AU immediately. Basically I have a competency kink and really like badass!danny shit 😊

Seeing Chin's long hair again made me swoon

My jaw dropped when I saw Jenna! I think it's really interesting that Steve still thinks of her so much, and I was surprised that she showed up in both the actual dreams and the montage. I definitely underestimated how much she impacted Steve's life, it seems, and I hate that we'll never hear him address that and we'll only know about it inadvertently like this.

(hand over the heart for how lori got like. one team shot. poor girlie.)

⭐I took the montage at the end as being flashbacks and memories that Steve was having as he left the compound. Looking at it through that lens certainly makes one unwell.

Obligatory squeal for Adam appearing just to save the day :))) look below to see the love of my life! :)))))) ⬇⬇⬇

Of course, the obligatory mcdanno bullet(s). It writes itself! The way Danny said Steve's name so small and broken when he found him. The way they look at each other on the ground, the pain their faces. I need an official apology statement from Scott and Alex for it. Can we talk about what flashes by during the montage at the end? (IMO it being Steve's memories.) So much Danny.

The first thing is Danny and Steve's first meeting. Jfc. The showrunners milk it SO MUCH and who's complaining

The big, rocking hug. The hands clasping underground. Gracie of course. And then Danny collapsing from the bioweapon, which to be honest I was NOT expecting to see at all--it felt like a genuinely strange choice to include in there and it really ONLY makes sense if you go along with all that being what Steve's remembering. Even then, I was surprised to see it, so basically this is Hawaii Five-Oh making mcdanno gayer than even I was wanting them to be. Steve still thinks about that? From so long ago? Even with so many other close calls in between then and now? Good fucking lord ok then loverboy that's WILD. Canon accepted ig this show is just pure whump.

Danny goes through all of this just days after losing his brother and killing Reyes. JFC can we please address that. I need a 30k introspection fic to let me into this man's mind rn.

The Wo Fat v.s. Steve fight at the end was INCREDIBLE. I would love to give the choreographer's hand a shake, it's some of the best work I've seen on television in a long time. It was impressive for a procedural like this. It was long and physical and you truly didn't know what the outcome was going to be; it everything that their built-up relationship deserved for a conclusion. It also happening with a Steve coming off of hours of torture and drugging was crazy (guess we finally know who would win a PVP if they were both at full strength!). That being said I was really impressed with Wo Fat's capabilities and physical prowess, I was not expecting it to be so even and close to the line. I actually jumped when Steve LIFTED him up into the lighting fixture. We do not talk about Steve's (Alex's???) raw upper-body strength enough.

Anyway. Electricity in the water play. The physicality hell that this gif below is ⬇. Fire extinguishers and loaded needles. Crazy martial arts. Chair and buckets (holy shit did y'all see the force with which Wo Fat SHOT that bucket?????) flying. All's fair. I loved it.

The shot going right through the forehead, clean. I don't know how to put into words why that's so monumental to me but it is.

The mystery bad lady was SO intriguing, I wish we got more from her... How does she know Wo Fat? Why was she entrusted with all that information on him and Steve and especially Doris? Absolutely where did she come from, what was her name? Why did I have a huge huge hot crush on her? All important questions. (Goes to show that h50 CAN give us some more genuine badass, not just there to date someone women characters, just explicitly choose not to. I'm holding out for Ellie to remain platonic so hard right now.)

Almost forgot Danny in that black Hawaiian shirt. Will be whimpering over that image forever. The whole episode I was trying to focus on the underlining betrayal mystery they were laying out but every time my brain started working too hard Scott with his stupid waist and those flower patterns just started flashing into my head

Again, are you seeing this:

I'm unwell and so so happy.

H50 you're a gem when you want to be.

[differenteagletragedy]

would you be ever so kind as to spare some OL2 headcanons or crumbs 🤲🤲

If you don’t wanna write for OL2 then OLBA is just as amazing!!!!!!

Hi! I will eventually write for OL2 I'm sure, but I haven't gotten through the demo yet! Right now I'm at the beginning of the first day of school -- I keep getting pulled back into the first one because it has such a chokehold on me lol.

But I was writing these for OLBA so I'll put them here! Thank you!!!

-- Do you like trashy reality shows? Good for you. Cove's not really into it, but he'll watch with you if you want him to. Derek can definitely have some fun with it. But Baxter turns into a monster.

MC answering their phone: Hey, what's up?

Baxter: DID YOU SEE, *this person* from *this show* got arrested.

MC: Aren't you supposed to be working?

Baxter: I saved the mug shot to my photos, I am sending it to you via text right now.

(Client in the background complaining)

Baxter: I do have to get off the phone now, but if you hear anything else call the office and tell them it's an emergency, they'll put you through to me.

-- If you go the Derek romance route, I think you make out once in high school. Because hormones, you've crushed on each other for years, and like it just happens. And then after he's very unwell, he keeps apologizing, and either your really shy and nervous about it or like "no it's ok, that was nice," but either way he's like "HAVE TO GO, TTYL." He doesn't talk to you for a little bit but then feels bad.

MC: Derek, I like you in a romantic way. I want you to be my boyfriend. I liked kissing you and I want to kiss you again.

Derek: Haha that was crazy, so how's school going?

-- Derek is good with cars. Big muscles make car go vroom.

Like there would have been a time when you got a flat tire and you either didn't know how to change it or blanked on what Cliff told you (Cliff taught you how to change a tire, no questions) and called him like "help" and he dropped everything and drove to wherever you were to change it for you.

-- He's also good with mechanical fixes, and just with his hands in general. Is your sink messed up? Call Derek. Some issue with your stove? Call Derek. Creaky door? You already know. (You have to do stuff for him too though, that's the rules).

-- Back to Cliff though, you know those videos of men like "I'm going to teach you some dad stuff" for people who grew up without dads? That's Cliff. Obviously your moms are amazing, but Daddy Cliff is going to step in too sometimes.

-- Cliff teaching MC how to tie a tie, just imagine.

-- Baxter goes home alone after Miranda's birthday party/the second party for him and finishes off that bottle of champagne because he knows that summer's almost over and he's going to do A Bad Thing and he hates himself.

-- Honestly it hurt my feelings so much at the end of Step 3 lol, like I was genuinely taken aback by his goodbye scene. Asking MC why they'd keep talking when he couldn't give them rides anymore like that's all they were interested in, the audacity.

-- Cove has the whole game, he's gonna be ok, we're talking about other people this time.

-- In adulthood, MC looks back at that time they learned their birth parents died when they were a baby, had a quick breakdown then went back home and did a musical performance for their family as one of the cringiest moments of their life (I'm not using second person this time because I don't want to sound judgey but LOL come on). They'll tell Derek about it later on when they're together and he'll be like "aww, that sounds sweet," and Baxter will be nice about it too, but he'll also have some comments to make.

Baxter: Darling, my plant at the office seems to be dying, could you perhaps do a song and dance number to ease my pain?

MC: Shut uuuuuup.

-- Last week gb patch made a post on Patreon with a new sketch for OLNF with wedding planner Baxter, so like the oldest Baxter we'll see in cannon, and he was wearing a cream turtleneck, a purple overcoat, and what looked to me to be a peach colored gingham suit. So by the time he gets to be like 40, his fashion sense is going to be off the rails. He's going to call you and be like "I just went shopping, I hope you like my new look," and come home like:

[candlecordyceps]

Ok I’m taking the time to Yap now WARNING FOR ANIME SPOILERS IF YOU HAVENT WATCHED IT!!!

This is just my raw emotional reactions, opinions, and just general interpretations of the last few scenes in the episode.

Starting off, I’m beginning with Shuro confronting Laois for what he did. Shuro seems to be a very high-standing fellow from what I’ve been given so far (as an anime only currently- I will start reading the manga once it finishes releasing I promise). He has guards that are close to him, and I assume he’s rich, and knowing that he will DEFINITELY care a lot more about black magic and laws, because they effect him more due to his (assumed) status. He’s understandably terrified of what this means for Falin. And he confronts Laois by asking him,

“Do you know what you’ve done?” He tells him all the hell that he can go through for it, what FALIN will go through for it, Marcille will go through- but Laois knows.

He’s well aware of the consequences and he was willing to do it anyways. For Falin. For his sister. Because she was willing to risk her life for him and for everyone, everyone followed suit, and the desperation to do so was so powerful they were willing to do what it took. And Laois ALSO knows, that despite what Shuro is doing right now,

He would’ve done the same. Shuro won’t kill him, because he knows he would’ve done anything too. Laois doesn’t GET people. He thought he could trust Shuro to be quiet. At this point it’s pretty obvious to me, especially in the episode with him being clingy and friendly with Shuro, calling him the one of the “only ones to call him a friend”, despite Shuro’s very obvious uncomfortable-disturbed-annoyed attitude toward Laois and general unwellness being unnoticed (until told specifically of it, to which Laois immediately got onto Shuro about his health). Yet, he knows Shuro would’ve done anything too.

Shuro stays his sword, Laois wishes for understanding, Kabru gets a drama boner (I find it funny how into it he is), and the scene changes. And FUCK man.

Laois loves Falin so much, and he knows how much Shuro cares. He cared enough to return. He told him everything because he needs the help, and he’s banking on the care for Falin to be enough to work with him to return her to safety. I’m SOOOO hoping he does help. That he breaks down and the sword falls from Laois’s neck. That even though it goes against a law so potent it could get everyone involved into extremely deep trouble, the bonds he’s made are enough. I don’t know Shuro well enough at all. Lord knows if he’ll even keep it to himself if they get out of the dungeon. But GOD am I not thrilled to figure out more. AND NOW, to the scene that made me scream from my seat multiple times,

Faliiiiiinnnnnnnnn GHHHHHOOOODDDD. When I tell you I GASPED. Watching the hands that we had witnessed painstakingly put together. The hands That two people took the care into fixing and making sure each was in the perfect place- scraping against the floor. Bloody around the sleeves, clawing forward- on a mission for someone she doesn’t actually know. Her mind is warped by the mission of the mage. Put back together just to bleed and be reshaped and melded to something scary and unknown and new-

AND ITS TERRIFYING. LOOK AT HER. JESUS CHRRRIIIIIIIST. Someone so loved and someone they all want to protect is RIGHT THERE, but she’s almost unrecognizable beyond her face, and mentally she’s so incredibly far away.

I can’t imagine the distress in everyone as they realize that they have to fight the exact person they’ve been fighting for. Because there’s no way she is peaceful and there is no way she’ll just “be Falin” without some extreme inbetweens. There’s no way that the mage doesn’t return if/when they succeed. I’m SOO excited to witness them figure it out and try to save her once more.

IF YOU MADE IT HERE THANKS FOR READING ME YAPPING!! This is mainly a little storage for me later when I wanna revisit and figure out what I thought before I knew what happened. Have a nice day/night readers!

[somanyfandomsblog]

ok episode 8 review

spoilers!!!! ‼️

the ares fight …. THE ARES FIGHT and callback to percy and luke’s training YEAH … cinema!

percy thinking sally was in the house when it was really just alecto 🥲 my baby just wants to see his mother

ANNABETH PUTTING HER NECKLACE ON PERCY I SCREAMED unwell I’m unwell

hate Zeus *eye twitch* (love lance reddick, rest in peace 😔)

Poseidon like low key beating the deadbeat allegations but also not answering the one questions his son has ever asked him and just throwing him off Olympus 😃 Poseidon you’re moving down on my shit list, but get it together !!!!!!!!!

everyone cheering for percy as he enters camp YEAH! put that respect on my son’s name!!!!!!!

the Percabeth hug … no one ever speak to me again actually !!!! the lingering while annabeth is filling him in…. biblically accurate Percabeth I fear !!!!

luke being a SNAKE at the cabin with percy and annabeth YOU SNAKE! you know it’s not clarisse 😤

the whole luke v percy …. SO MUCH BETTER THAN THE BOOK IMO! 🤭🫣 maybe just being able to like see the betrayal on Percy’s face (give Walker his Emmy rn pls) but also loved the sword fighting aspect AND how you can tell luke wants percy to come with him more than he wants to hurt him AND THEN ANNABETH BEING THERE AND SEEING AND HEARING IT AND THEN LUKES FACE AFTER yeah never talk to me again!!!!

THE GOODBYE SCENE BY THALIA I’m— no! Percy’s smile at Annabeth AND GROVER GETTING THE SEARCHERS LICENSE why is it a literal flower tho I’m dead

but the whole “no one’s ever thought to check the sea before” SEA OF MONSTERS YEAH season two when babe!!???

“let’s all agree no matter what to meet back here next year” ok so percy… funny story…. 👰‍♂️

SALLY but then them taking that away and it’s a Kronos dream… rude

but then actually sally 🥰🥹🥹🥹

percy calling Kronos grandpa has me DECEASED LMAOOOO

go to 7th grade percy yeah put Annabeth’s picture in your notebook yeah🥰

the bonus scene with Gabe turning to stone HAHAHAHA it honestly made so much more sense that he just grabbed it and opened Percy’s mail unprompted bc he’s a dick lmao.

whew. WHAT AN EPISODE … best one yet, dare I say????? I loved it! Ugh! I need a season 2-5 renewal NOWWWWW!!

[child-of-the-danube]

So this is truly it, huh? Just like that, no more Doom Patrol?

I don't think I can completely explain how I feel about the show as a whole and how much it means to me, but this final episode just left me empty for both good and bad reasons.

WARNING!!! SPOILERS INCOMING!! DO NOT READ FURTHER IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE EPISODE YET!

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The whole Immortus/Butts resolution felt like such a cop-out. Immortus just going "Nah, you know what, I'm fine. Here's your longevity. Oh, and I'm besties with the Butts now. Too-da-loo 🥰" after being presented as their biggest threat ever? Meh

It would have been more cathartic had they somehow defeated Immortus when she was occupied with the Butts and got the longevity thingy off her neck to then run home only to find Rita already dead with Laura frozen with shock/grief beside her. To have them think they managed one more victory but with their biggest loss yet. And for Rita and Laura, the moments before she died could have been used to have a proper conversation and resolution between them. I would have loved if the final scene between them (and with alive non-ghost Rita in general) would have been Laura bringing her the Immortus nail just for Rita to decline cause she's at peace with dying. Even a simple "You're forgiven" would have been enough. And what was the point of telling Laura she's part of the Doom Patrol now to go "Yeah, you should all go your own way now" five minutes after she kicked the bucket???

Vic's ending was expected. It was obvious from the start that he would make it. And I'm glad cause he deserves happiness and to build a future that HE feels is right for him finally.

I'm also delighted Jane (a.k.a just K now) got her happiness both within herself and with Casey. And she's the only one we saw on screen saying goodbye to at least one person properly. Her and Cliff's realtionship was one of my absolute favourite things about the show.

Seems I managed to guess Larry's ending almost exactly. It was so sweet and beautiful. He didn't just return to space with Keeg but Rama as well. Can't lie, I've shed some tears during that scene. And his moment with ghost Rita... 12/10 wouldn't change anything about it

Cliff's ending is my favourite and the one that got me bawling my eyes out. "It's ok. I made it home" Uhm, excuse me?????? How dare the writers break my heart like that???? I am unwell and will need 5-7 business days to recover from it. Poetic, beautiful, amazing, showstopping etc. I love Cliff so fucking much

Dorothy who? Guess she just fell off the Earth after Immortimas

Also, Shelley? Never heard of her. Try looking in the woods when it gets foggy maybe 🤷

I guessed Rita would definitely die too but her whole "Each of you will be better off on your own" turnaround just didn't sit right with me. She's the one that spent her life keeping this little, broken, miserable bunch of just the unluckies motherfuckers known to the world together and managed to create a family that loves and supports eachother to death and THIS is her conclusion?? That they should just disband? Nope, not buying it. I guess it's somehow a way of telling that now the one that held them together, the heart of the show if you will, is gone that it's all done but I feel like that's a an insult to the rest of them and to the strength of their bond. Yes, Rita's insistence brought them together at first, but they've grown and gotten close so much since then even without her interfering in their one-on-one relationships. It just doesn't feel right. I also knew we'd get a Malcolm reunion scene but am I the only one that doesn't really care about him? Tbh, we didn't get to know much about him beside the fact that he was Rita's lover that tragically died. I just can't care about a character I know nothing about. I guess have fun posthumously frolicking in a field, Rita and Malcolm 🤷

So Jane got Casey and her sanity, Larry got Keeg and Rama, Vic got his friends and students, Cliff got see his family, their future and die peacefully beside them, Rita got to reunite with the love of her life in eternity and Laura got to, uhm, *checks notes*, play with a flamethrower? Like, ok, I do dig that she got to destroy the place that ruined her whole life guns a-blazing but what exactly does she get to do later on? The ones who remained alive all got someone to share their new found joy with, a proper plan for the future, they're at peace. Laura didn't get to neither truly reconcile with Rita, nor the Sisterhood, and now the only people she felt close to either died or went their own way without a true goodbye. What, pray tell, does her future look like beside, once again, loneliness and grief???? I fucking hated her ending. Give us a Laura de Mille spin-off, you cowards. Make it right...

[zhongrin]

cw. fontaine archon quest act 3 & 4 spoilers, feral & downbad meirin

scenes from my 180+ screenshots that made me go feral aka i say the most unhinged shit upon seeing wriothesley

pt.1/2

so..... does he need a duchess maybe....... perhaps...... mayhaps....

but what if i want to. what if i want him to catch me doing unspeakable things and cuff me to discipline me what if i want him to p- /is hit and dragged away

BARKBARKBARKBARKBAKRBARKABRKBARK

will you show me your bedroom i can warm up your bed

im drooling

i'm interested in managing your household as your wife

listen. listen. listen. but what if. what if, right. what if. i spend my time..... in your room instead.

SCREAMS CRIES YELLS SQUEAKS SQUEALS SQUEES AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

he's so. oh gods. he's so buff im. ooh m god im unwell

can i. can i combine those 2 together. can i sit on h- /is hit and dragged away x2

then we can just not come back and say "the duke was hot, so i married him"

yeah but he can pin ME down and f- /is hit and dragged away x3

SIR ID LIKE TO ASK YOU TO [train passes] [crows squawks] [clock chimes] /is hit and dragged away x4

I HAVE. LOADS OF TEA. SIR. LET ME BREW YOU A TEA I AM BEGGING. I HAVE A TEAHOUSE YOU CAN DRINK EVERYTHING FOR FREE

OH IM AROUSED ALRIGHT-  /is hit and dragged away x5

YOUR GRACE IM BEGGING IM ON MY KNEES IM OPENING MY- /is hit and dragged away x6

eager is an understatement also it's ok she can have the finest tea but can i have your c-  /is hit and dragged away x7

i can make you a parent wrio winkwonk

SCREAMING YELLING CRYING WHY IS THIS MAN A MASH OF AL HAITHAM AND ZHONGLI WHY IS HE SO HOT SOMEONE HOLD ME

sPANK ME i mean what

i think i just c-  /is hit and dragged away x8

i'm sorry 'ah, miss clorinde. my door' and that lil freminet on the bottom right cRACKED ME UP

[gilmores-glorious-blog]

episode seven thoughts:

- ok last episode was good so now i’m scared again

- please start with a morning after scene (update: FUCK YEAHHH)

- the character growth but also rest in peace sexy leather outfit 😔👊

- is that stede’s ring 👀

- “bye bye” i love him

- the breakfast in bed i’ll cry 😭

- “it’s a piece of twine. i panicked.”

- “it’s my way of saying thank you” :’)

- oh my GOD IZZY

- “hi boys :D” “JESUS!” “fuck off.”

- this is just like every fanfiction but better

- “it’s not just the ship that has been well and truly docked ;)… congratulations” oh my FUCKING GOD. the way i SCREAMED.

- “…he’s jealous” oop—

- i’m sorry but even if they explicitly tell me that jim/olu/archie/zheng aren’t in a polycule i won’t believe it.

- the letters :’)

- STOP CALLING EACH OTHER “FRIEND” OH MY GOD

- ed looks so goddamn fond <3

- “people have your face tattooed on their body ?” “not just my face 👀”

- not the old-timey paparazzi 💀

- jackie is slaying so hard

- “the sweet and spicy, just like my wife ;D”

- “the swede got so hot” “it’s an adjustment for me as well!”

- “birds love drinking for free!” “…no that’s not what i mean 😐”

- “your man” :’)

- is this the first time we’ve seen ed and jackie interact?? i love them

- i know we saw the “blackbeard are you poor now” in the trailer but the fact that he said “are you a poor now” is killing me

- “fucks like a jackhammer 👀”

- “was it as devastating as it was arousing?” god i love the swede

- “family who fucked!”

- “we’re anchors for each other” BECAUSE YOU’RE IN LOVE

- “made your boyfriend blush” “hmm :)” the way that i love them 😭😭

- “we’re a partnership” yeah okay gayass

- i love the androgyny of all these random pirates

- OH my god he just set a man on fire. holy shit.

- okay stede this may be going too far

- the ear piercing :D

- ohhh no ed no it wasn’t a mistake

- “i’m leaving” ED DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE

- “you’re a coward” ohhhh shit oh fuck oh no

- noooo my boys 😭😭😩

- god i love frenchie and his money-making schemes

- wee john has every talent known to man

- “you like me for me” no ED likes you for you you DUMB BITCH

- izzy please dear god talk some sense into him

- “i think you’re good for him” :’)

- “when i told him i loved him” i’m unwell.

- ok ok everything’s fine it’s fine because in the trailers they’re together so it’s fine

- zheng and olu are very cute if i ignore that they’re not going the poly route

- all four of them interacting… PLEASE BE POLY DON’T LEAVE GOD EVERYONE STOP LEAVING EACH OTHER

- people stop leaving stede challenge

- “et tu olu” lmao

- “your serial killer boyfriend” oh shit “or did he already leave you again” OH SHIT

- nooo steak knife 😭😭 rest in peace (i shouldn’t laugh but also that was really funny)

- ohhh stede………..

- they just got unbanned from jackie’s and now they’re starting a bar fight,,,

- oh my godddd stede

- oh my GOD

- holy shit ricky you madman (/neg)

- oh my godddd poor zheng

- well fuck.

- it’s okay fang and roach being cute will fix everything

- but also why is everyone leaving!!

- guys did you know that i hate the found family splitting up trope because i really fucking hate the found family splitting up trope

- the way that ed says stede’s name in the preview for next week 😭

- guys if they kill izzy i’ll cry

- i am not fucking ready. how is there only one episode left. what the fuck.

[thefisherqueen]

Notes while watching Granada's Sherlock Holmes: The elegible bachelor. They made a full movie out of this short story, I'm curious to see how the material has been expended upon

The beginning of this story was tough to watch. Good of Granada to touch upon the subject of the treatment of mentally unwell people, though. May we one day react to people in obvious grief and distress with compassion and offering them what they need to recover, not by subduing/restraining them or locking them up, as today still happens too often

"You wild and beautiful thing" "Not half as wild and beautiful as you" oooh smooth dude. She really is very beautiful and looks stunning in that smart riding costume! New discovery about myself: I have much more of a weakness for women in smart victorian clothing than in the prettiest of dresses. New sexuality unlocked: victorian women while they're on the move + Jeremy Brett, but only for staring at (for an uncomfortable amount of time)

To expand upon my previous point: especially staring at Jeremy Brett sprawled on the sofa in just his nightdress, which is all open at the neck and chest. Sir what are you doing to me

Not too sure about Holmes' dream. Did they choose to depict this case as a post-Reichenbach one and is that why it's all about the waterfall? I'm always in favour when media shows trauma symptoms, and think it very realistic that Holmes would have reoccuring nightmares about waterfalls after that experience, but it's a bit overdone I think. Could have made more impact if it had been a little more subtle. Loved his charcoal drawings of the dream, though, and also the 'hyperventilating via pipe". Seems like a thing Holmes would do

The old gossiping aunts are hilarious

So much screaming and fighting, was that really necessary Grananda? Holmes walking around through dark alleys in a bad mental health state is very valid, but this feels a little like I'm watching Sweeny Todd... not the greatest of association for Sherlock Holmes

"Come and use your whore, my lord. You'll never have anyone who'll do what you want like me" ehm, madam? *uncomfortably close-up of her mouth* oooh, this bachelor's former sweetheart is actually trying to murder him for daring to marry another? Exciting

Mrs. Hudson waiting in the corridor for Holmes is adorable. "I don't really sleep these days" oh no I want to hug him so badly. Watson where are you? Your intimate friend needs you

This seems like a really draining episode for Jeremy Brett to play! I want to look up if he ever commented on it

Love that Mrs. Hudson contacts Watson to say that Holmes is not doing well. "You should have called me earlier" "I didn't dare disobey him" lots of hugs for mrs. Hudson too

The emotion in Jeremy Brett's voice and face as he explains the nightmare *cries with him* Also love that they added the anger and irritation and unhinged stuff about missing Moriarty from the book. Mental health problems are not all pretty tears

The scene out on the street in the rain is unhinged, I love it

Ok, halfway through the movie and the real investigations have began. I'm quite faceblind and having trouble keeping the different ladies involved apart, and the men as well, so this will be fun to try to keep up with

*deep, silky voice* "That any man should be worthy of such love..." are you trying in seduce her, Holmes? I don't think it's working. She just wants her bottle and her lord

I knew you could walk dramatically down a stairs, never have seen one walking dramatically up it before

"It could not happen today, we have the lunacy act, you can't just put people away" "It can if you are a handsome duke" This is an interesting piece of dialog. Not quite saying all that's wrong in mental health care, but this episode is already digging deeper than most media does, especially because it also depicts Holmes - the protaganist - as having mental health problems. That already paints a much more even and sympathetic picture. It's easy to imagine Holmes, if he lived in less privileged circumstances and showed less acceptable symptoms and wouldn't have people who cared about him close, ending up in an asylum. And Watson is a doctor - not necessarily safe for someone like Holmes. Where the critique falls down is the 'innocent woman locked up, is not mad', which doesn't adress the abuse of those who are locked up and are 'mad'

"I live only half a life. Nothing seems to break the gray circle I live in" I bet that Holmes can relate to that statement. And Jeremy Brett choose to show that by standing very close to her, even at one time shortly touching her hand, which Holmes never does with strangers. That was a beautiful acting choice

"I walk the streets at night. I'm looking for danger. Sometimes I'm asking the world to hurt me, so I can feel alive" It's a shame Holmes is immediately back in investigation mode after those moving lines. It's like Holmes' bad mental health episode is treated like a mere plot device, the nightmare containing actual clues. I generally like when dreams are used as foreshadowing, but I think it works better when it's more obscure, something like 'dream gives idea for solution' or 'dream sets mood for something happening later'. This is a bit too straightforward and, like the 'creeping man' episode, the occurance of straight up predictive/telepathic dreaming feels out of place. Wrong genre

*Holmes is distracted by laundry mid-conversation* hehe very ADHD of him

"I cannot expect you to understand how much I envy you. The delight it must be to face an opponent of some worth" Very appropriate thing to say to a depressed woman who lost her sister and got disfigured herself, Holmes

"Trust me" "Not an inch, my lord" Haha, probably sensable

Oh no, he killed another wife. Mistress. Whatever. Loved that Granada made him full evil

VERY brave of the american girl to confront her 'husband', but oh, so scared for her now *few minutes later* don't agonise him further silly girl! You're being very brave, but also very stupid! Come on, Holmes and Watson, hurry!

Nice shot Watson :)

Ah, there's the second wife, still alive! And she - oh. Interesting. Did not have 'became feral witch and took revenge on her husband in the prison he locked her up in by a trap she made herself' on my bingo card

The ending when she crawled out of her prison... that was very wholesome, actually. Love that she was allowed to become 'ugly' and still be a hero, that's rare for female characters. Hope she and her sister will live on happily together. They can at least share their trauma

And it ends with a performance... wait, so miss Miller did survive? Good! And Watson and Holmes are watching it with the sisters, I presume? Gosh I'm so bad at faces. Guess it must be

A wild and dark episode for sure, overall a very interesting watch. Just a shame about the prophetic dreaming, that was a bit out of place and unnecessary

[wikipedie]

Important Note: due to conversations with other fans and the fact that OP changed their mind after finishing the show, the original order has changed. Please see the replies for more details, as these lovely people have left pertinent arguments.

Okay, The Mentalist lovers, for the purpose of better understanding the characters, I wanna figure out their love languages. So far I've only tried to figure out for Jane and Lisbon. This post will be about them, but I will try to make separate posts for the rest of the characters as well.

Ok so the love languages are: Quality Time, Physical Touch, Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service and Gifts.

We can consider both how they like to receive love and how they like to offer it, as I think it can be different sometimes. Most people consider that what you like to offer is what you like to receive but I don't think it's true (for example, speaking for me, offering gifts is much higher on the hierarchy than receiving gifts)

For offering love, I have made the list considering which ones they resort to express love. For receiving, I have thought about which ones make them feel most loved.

Teresa Lisbon

Offer: Definitely Acts of Service. It's probably what she learnt as the oldest sister (and it's a common one for Oldest Sisters) after her mum died (and especially after her father died) and had to take care of everyone. It's apparent in her relationships with everyone. She is willing to help Jane multiple times barely knowing what he's thinking, she offers help and advice to others whenever she's asked and has the constant vibe of "I'll take care of you."

Receive: Maybe controversial take but...Physical Touch. I know she's not exactly a hugger, but I have had people in my life who seemed cold and distant and didn't offer a lot of Physical Touch...but it was precisely because Physical Touch was so important to them. It was their number one Love Language and you'd have never guessed at first but then it made sense. And I think it's the same for Lisbon. She always offers comfort physically when someone is unwell and she longs to be physically close to them when she's worried about them. (I am thinking about that scene with Grace when she got shot and Lisbon told her "Never worry me like this again", standing so close to her. I am also thinking about the scene where Hightower hugs her and I think Physical Touch could be Hightower's top love language as well.)

Observations: She definitely loves gifts as well, she reacts positively to receiving gifts from the team, as seen in the casino episode when Jane buys her jewelry (even if she returns it), as well as her birthday episode. And I would say that the last one is Words of Affirmations. (she doesn't seem to take compliments seriously, ever. Not when superiors do it, not when Jane does it, not when Walter Mashburn did it or when Grace read that article about her in season 2). And she doesn't like to bring attention to herself or her achievements. Honestly she looks like she had to train herself to react with "Thank you", when she receives lovely feedback or compliments. (maybe that could be a fic hmm). I am not sure about the other remaining two, I feel like they could go either way, but I'd put AoS before QT simply because she offers love like that. Also I think she's the type of person who would feel love fiercely even if she doesn't have a lot of Quality Time with that person.

As for offering love order, I don't have a lot to offer as argument, only that I have thought which ones seem to appear more frequently (and make sense for the characters). As such, Lisbon offers a lot of encouraging words and advice, and resorts to Physical Touch in special moments. We don't see her engaging in much quality time with others. While she offers gifts, it's not among her first ways of showing love and care (as opposed to Jane).

Finally - Personal opinion on the order of offering love: Acts of Service, Words of Affirmation, Physical Touch, Quality Time, Gifts

Finally - Personal opinion on the order of receiving love: Physical Touch, Gifts, Acts of Service, Quality Time, Words of Affirmation.

Patrick Jane

Offer: Edit: There is no doubt after finishing the show that his top offering love language is Gifts. It was hard to see previous to Season 6, as he does not do it very often, but there are signs even in S5 and earlier. (ex: the jewelry and watches in the casino episode, the strawberries he buys for the team as an apology...sometime in S1-2, the gifts he gets the team in the Dinosaurs episode in S5) And after those two years, there are indeed the gifts he buys for the new team to get in their good graces and the things he likes to offer Lisbon. He enjoys getting things for the people he loves and knowing he's right. (when he buys Lisbon the wedding ring and doesn't want her to come, because he'll know what to get and he'll enjoy surprising her). If he cannot offer gifts (or is not particularly close to people), he offers Words of Affirmation, which is why perhaps I was tricked at first into thinking that was his main love language. But I stand corrected.

Receive: This one is rather difficult. I am quite sure that Words of Affirmations is pretty high on the list (due to how shy but proud he gets when Lisbon compliments him on something, but then again it could be a praise kink as well lol); however, I am not sure if it is the top love language for him. But if Words of Affirmation weren't his top receiving love language, then my bet would be on Quality Time.

And I don't have a lot to offer to back up my argument except that he is a man that enjoys life (time) and enjoys having a good time. At least at the beginning of the show, he is the type of man that would postpone an investigation to sit on the beach and build sand castles, that would go to a casino with the purpose of learning about the investigation and who generally inserts himself as much as possible in order to be able to figure it out. He is making tea constantly for himself (not that it's much of an argument but the point is that he's making his life pleasant where he can). Up until season 5, he spends most of his time in the bullpen, on the couch, where he can be with everyone. He loves being in a space where everyone is just existing and doing their thing (him reading or napping while they're talking or working for example). And I think that him being more cooped up in the attic in season 5 is actually a good point for it. When his hunt and obsession for Red John are at their highest, he is at his lowest (particularly emotionally). So he is even more withdrawn, feels disconnected. And while all of the love languages are more muted in this season, I think the fact that he has less quality time both with the people in his life, and with life in general are the biggest red flag that something is amiss. (he doesn't even sit long enough to watch the film properly when he meets up with Stiles.) Additionally, I can think of other moments in previous seasons where he'd just wanted his people's company (sharing an ice cream with Lisbon, going to drinks with the team, etc.). Overall, he gives me the impression that you'd destroy the man emotionally if you just told him "I just want to spend time with you." (or if Lisbon told him that) - especially since he's probably a bit used to be considered annoying and unwanted.

Edit: Indeed, I will remain of my opinion that his top Receiving love language is Quality Time. The most important thing to Jane is to spend time with the people whom he loves - particularly Lisbon. Indeed that receiving gifts is much higher on the list than previously stated (he really appreciates them and he's always blown away when he receives something from Lisbon, but he does not expect them and it seems that he does not want to receive gifts on his birthday).

However, I like to back up my arguments, so I will present my reasoning backed up by some evidence. First we have the letter that he sent her while he was away: "I've been meaning to apologise for leaving you on the beach that night. You being absent is the one thing that made this new chapter strange and sad."

Secondly we have the love confession. As some people have pointed out already, what really bothered Jane was not that Lisbon was dating Pike ('What matters the most to me is that you're happy'), but that he would not get to see her every day anymore, that she would go away. And perhaps that she would go without knowing how he felt about her.

Thirdly, there's little things, such as changing the reservations for their weekend getaway, and preferring their wedding to be a very small affair, just a thing shared between them two. (even if he makes concessions for the family and close friends)

Observations: After finishing the show, I can say that Physical Touch is much lower on the scale of love languages for Jane. He doesn't really touch people a lot, except when he has a reason (including Lisbon. You can notice in the above statement, that he is telling her that he wants to spend time with her, but still holds his hands intertwined to himself. Nothing wrong with that, of course, but if Physical Touch was important to him, he would be more open - see Lisbon's posture.) I would say Acts of Service is the last one, still, because he still has a lot of trouble accepting help, and prefers to do things by himself.

Finally - Personal opinion on the order of offering love: Gifts, Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Acts of Service, Physical Touch.

Finally - Personal opinion on the order of receiving love: Quality Time, Gifts, Words of Affirmation, Physical Touch, Acts of Service.

[suffarustuffaru]

hi so im currently coping with my finals by making more playlists to listen to. please take my offerings. yes. its more subaru playlists. the other two i made simply wasnt enough to hold the weight of my brainrot 👍

yes so actually ive spent like the past few years having like private pridebaru and greedbaru playlists to myself so i decided to finally refine them and add them to spotify yep <3 notes under cut.

yeah so in general i tried to have a balance of songs about subaru being Unwell and Not Having A Good Time and songs about subaru being A Horrible Person for the ultimate listening experience👍also if youre not a japanese speaker i once again recommend looking at the lyrics for the japanese songs because theyre very good lyrics ok.

so about greedbaru playlist!!! this is based on the greed if ln by the way yes so the playlist is roughly in order of the events going on there.

"inevitabilis" to "guns for hire": subaru accepts the contract with echidna. also yes i used "a sadness runs through him" again it is like. the quintessential ifbaru song for some of the ifs yes. looked in the wrong place for redemption and all that.

"circles" to "leech boy": greed if's arc 4 happens and everyone is Miserable now <3 "our word" is subaru learning to Gaslight and Gatekeep from echidna. "hole-dwelling" by kikuo marks um. that one scene in the greed if ln where subaru kills dream echidna and then has a mental breakdown over that. yes. "evil angel" is subaru capturing meili. you can probably read the "angel" in the song being either echidna, subaru, or elsa.

"are you satisfied?" and "literary nonsense": arc 4 is over yay!!! surely everything will be fine......

"bitter choco decoration" (by syudou) to "no body, no crime": nvm nothing is fine. this is the arc where clind tries to destroy subaru but subaru. Retaliates. so to speak. "sunset lover" is just referencing subaru's save scumming... "this kingdom is mine" is subaru figuring out the culprit killing him is clind.

"your obedient servant" and "someone gets hurt (reprise)": ottosuba divorce. otto leaves subaru.

"everything stays" to the end of the playlist: subaru establishes the official greed if emilia camp by manipulating felt into leaving + reinhard into joining the faction yay!!! "anger" and "drywall" is in reference to subaru punching a wall remembering otto. and its also referencing greed if subaru having "good" days and "bad" days.

this playlist is a loop if you compare the last two songs with the first two songs.

pride playlist!!! its shorter but still a banger. in my honest and nonbiased opinion. also genuinely i listened to a lot of these while writing pride if fanfic like two years ago so thats also why theyre here HAH.

"once upon a dream" to "open up your eyes": subaru has his whole 88 first arc loops of hell where he keeps trying to brute force killing elsa 👍also i thought itd be horribly funny to put a spin on my mainbaru playlist by putting in "never ever getting rid of me" and "magia" in there alsdjfljsdf

"oh ana" and "hellfire": subaru "meets" reinhard.

"stalker's tango" to "partners in crime": subaru does more pride if things 👍joins the witch cult, makes plans, teams with elsa, etc etc.

"a story told" and "hey there delilah": subaru manipulates ferris. :(( you could probably also see the "delilah" as reinhard or emilia too.

also i use "theyre only human" again - in the greed if playlist its to reference echidna and subaru talking with each other in the dream world / through the crystal. and also because subaru is very Detached from everyone around him. thats also why its in the pride if playlist!! and "a story told" is in both playlists because. well subarus a little mansplain manipulate manwhore.

"death ballet 2nd" to the end of the playlist: yeah subaru burns down the whole country and wins at all his goals. everyone gets fucked :<<

[joshriku]

Hello! do you have any cherik fic recs?

i have . so many. (pukes and cries) this is gonna be long but to start off i'm gonna give you my ultimate faves of like. each iteration. so i can be insane. i won't make summaries bc im bad i will just tell you how insane i am.

general thing that none of these have a sad ending or triggering topics bc im. im . I Like Happiness

-curses that can't be lifted by sotano: see. this is about cherik early comics canon right. when they just met in haifa. AND OOOOOOO GH oGH oghghgOGOH I LOVE LEAVING COMMENTS. I LEAVE LONG COMMENTS. I AM VERY ILL IN THE BRAIN WHEN IT COMES TO LEAVING COMMENTS. BUT I LITERALLY STILL CANT FIGURE OUT WHAT TO SAY IN THIS BC I LOVE IT SO MUCH. LIKE ILL COME AROUND EVENTUALLY OF COURSE. BUT IVE READ IT LIKE 50 TIMES AND ITS SO GOOD ITS SO GOOD IT MAKES ME DERANGED i was reading it yesterday again. as i do. and i had to close the tab bc it made me so unwell. i'm so normal

-afterlife by anna: this fic is so good but for my mental health it's in shambles. You don't get it. i'll be pacing around my room thinking back of scenes in this and im like ALRIGHT. PAUSE TO THROW UP AND CRY. EVER SINCE IVE READ THIS I HAVEN'T BEEN THE SAME DO YOU UNDERSTAND. IT'S POST DAYS OF FUTURE PAST AND THAT MAKES ME SO ILLLLLLL I LOVE DOFP SO BAD AND I LOVE CHARLES IN IT AND im like oh man i need something to make me cry and puke and shit myself and cure my depression im gonna read that fic again. And i do it. and i am cured. after i cry myself out to this i am so normal again

-someplace that is green by mugsandpugs: oh my god. Also bad for my mental health like (pucnhign myself) YOU DONT UNDERSTAND. it's technically x-men evolution but if you know cherik you'll understand it either way so. just. wow. erik can fit so much trauma. I can fit so many emotions. i can be so mentally ill. IREAD IT SO MUCH LIEK THE SLOOOOOWWBWBURRNNNNNNNNN AHH AHH AHH (PUKES AND CRIES) AHH WANDA AND PIETRO. AH. DEAR GOD. U DONT GET IT !!!!!! THE WORLDBUILDIGN!! (curls up and cries)

ok yeah. i'll put under the cut all the other recs i have sorry for being unwell

you should read everything by ao3 user sotano btw. not to be demented or deranged. but they never miss. everything they ever write is so . Oh my god. U dont get it. im ill. i will buy them a house

-tabula rasa by o2doko: the telepathy exploration of this goes so fucking hard

-fair verona by ha_neul: i love gender so much you don't ungerstand trans fics are the world to me they really arre

-tesselation by nekosmuse: oh my god. i mean it's a popular fic so it's probably been read. BUT THE SLAY. GOD. THE WRITING. PUKES AND DIES

-travel advisory by penknife: SORRY FOR RECCING 2003 FICS BUT FLOGOGHGOGOGH THE 2003 PEOPLE GOT IT IN WAYS NOBODY ELSE DIDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!

-no capes by dedkake: this just hits all the spots of needing lighthearted comedy and keeping the magneto / professor x dynamic i so desperately crave. i love when authors play around with their identities while loosely sticking to canon hehe

-all these miles (just to get back home) by isthiswhatiam: you gotta read everything he posts tbh BUT this one is my personal fav i love post dark phoenix u_u

-in dreams begin responsibility by kass: im telling u the pre 2011 fics go so hard. and for what. My god. uim ill it's so good

-sweet by sadbigchungus: its so good. Do u know how fukcing hard it is to get krakoa cherik content. hard. but this hits all the sweet spots i love it so much it's so good

-a good night's sleep by insertsthmeaningful: Can i just say this author writes so much good fic and i am absolutely obsessed. as well as im obsessed w post assassination in xforce cherik like aoghogogjogghOGGH

-the way it travels in and keeps emitting light by populuxe: it's OGHGOGH i love reading this one. it's so hard to find fics that actually talk about disabilities and this one does it SO well and erik is SO perfect in this fic im sick!!

-a nice boy (the family matters edition) by pocky_slash: i don't wanna talk about how hard i cry when i reread this one i might have family issues of sorts.

-a winter's journey by red: i love old cheirk so mcuh it makes me want to eat my ownf oot

-the trouble with trilbies by obstrinatix: I LOVE. OLD MEN. CHERIK

-& other words by questors: this is so good like the worldbuilding genuinely floors and runs me over until im nothing but an useless dough

-necessary downtime by unforgotten: i . old cherik. Ogjjgjkrlgjlslkfd

-bug on a plate by lindstrom: ANOTHER ONE THAT ACTUALLY DESCRIBES DISABILITIES SUPER WELL AND DOESNT SHY AWAY FROM THEM ITS A HITTTT AND MIDDLE AGED CHERIK JUST HTIS DIFF SORRY

-the last love song and testament of charles f xavier by midrashic: u know what i said about liking afic so much u cant actually bring urself to properly word the comment so youre just waiting and waiting to properly say smth. Yea thats me w this fic too. why's it so fucking good. how am i meant to word my emotions. but hey if i got around to commenting on Afterlife i will to this

-one second and a million miles by madneto: nothing has ever put me through such a slowburn like this fic like it was so insane and crazy i felt like god was slapping me. PLUS. IRENE AND RAVEN ARE IN IT......SLAY!

-bloodbound by ikeracity: u know i didnt care about vampire fics until THIS ONE. WHERE I WAS LIKE. OH. OKAY. THEYRE GOOD ACTUALLY I SEE THE LIGHT IT MAKES SENSE NOW.

-the golden mean by somuchmorethanyouknow: IT'S SO GOOD OK. THE WAY I WISH THIS FIC WAS CANON JSUT BC IT WAS SO GOOD. THE GENOSHA BUILDING OF IT ALL. MY GODDDDDD! I LOVED IT. SO PAINFULLY GOOD. THE WRITING OF CHARLES AND EIRK IS SO EXCEPTIONAL BUT SO IS EVERYONE ELSE IN THE FIC TOO. AH

-make me stay by lynds: well. what can i say. who's to say no to a little telepathy play. sorry for liking bottom erik. as if it's my fault

-before you attempt me (fair warning) by kianspo: i read this one time i was really sad and i shouldnt have because i started crying about never being able to find a love like the one in this fic. anyway it's super good

-everything about it is a love song by pocky_slash: its bad for me. old cherik makes me go through itnso much. i cant believe ill never find love like this

-feels like you're mine by annejumps: Sorry for bottom erik enthusiast. AS IF ITS MY FAULTNTO HAVE SUCH GOOD TASTE

-because it's you that sets the test by equestrianstatue: [DERANGED NOISES] IM LIKEBSO CASUAL ABOUT THIS FIC IM NOT EVEN MENTALLH ILL.

-special studies in mutant topics by populuxe: my ao3 bookmark says "filed under fics i read while having a mental breakdown and saved my mental health" you can bet its so good and sexy and Oghgogngntnntnngng i will have to marry this authors writing style. SUBBING TO THIS AUTHOR ISNT ENOUGH I HAVE TO BUY THEM DINNER IDK

but also the sex thing: this fic ruined my ability to watch dofp. no matter how many times i watch it ill be quoting this fic along to it

thats it. for Now. i actually have more but some of them are just the real popular ones so im like. Yeah youve read it. BUT THE REST MIGHT BE FOR NEXT TIME. I GUESS. SORRY. THIS GOT OUT OF HAND

[ottiliere]

Ok so, 2 things

1. Oh? System Dirks are coming in here to show their appreciation? Because ours also DEVOURS this AU. It is genuinely so relatable and cathartic. When people don't think sharing vent art is good, I point at this AU and how it shows the ugly side of recovery so perfectly.

2. I was idly scrolling through the JTHM tag as I do frequently and got such intense whiplash seeing your recent post about asks in it. Like. Complete opposite side of our dash radar. What is this I hear about a JTHM ask?? I am fascinated already I font care if it's related to Dirk or not I just genuinely would love to hear your thoughts on it.

1) pulling all the dirks who follow me in for a hug through the walls of my plastic isolation bubble. it really makes me so happy to hear this. I can't give an extended answer to this point because I spent so much time talking about the next one but I hope you feel the mind waves of love I am bombarding you with.

2) The ask I got was in fact about Dirk, but as I'm drafting it it is...drifting...very much...into being about JTHM. "hear my thoughts on it" … this would be nothing shorter than a dissertation. I think about JTHM very often. I don't think it's possible for me to be concise about this in any sense of the word.

JTHM, to me, is one of the formative experiences that made me who I am. It is one of my favorite pieces of fiction ever made, that I have ever engaged with, and I know for a fact I will struggle to find something that is told in such a captivating way from an author with such an open soul. I discovered fanart of it by chance on DeviantArt, and, being naturally drawn towards edgier themes, searched everywhere on the internet until I found it uploaded onto some woman's livejournal account. I was obsessed with JTHM for a very, very long time. I reread it periodically, once or twice a year, and I have been doing this since I was 12. It has heavily influecned the way I go about making art and telling stories and engaging with everything I watch or read or what have you.

Everything about this comic blew my mind as a child, artistically absolutely, thematically especially. The narrative style that is glib with occasional moments of morose clarity that never lasts too long... we will never see anything like the suicide scene in anything else ever written again, of that I'm sure. It is unique in its existence. once you read that it unlocks something in your brain and you just can't go back. Multiplied by a million if you read it at a formative age you weren't really supposed to be reading it. Like homestuck.

Nny... he is the base of the character trope I always return to in fiction, usually unconsciously. I didn't realize that what I was doing to dirk mirrored nny until some friends pointed it out... it is a fascinating phenomenon. He is the first of his kind I have ever encountered in anything, ever. Blatantly unwell, the focus of a story that isn't necessarily slotting him into an antagonistic role. Like, he's the protagonist who I guess is also the antagonist but he's also a human. He's this guy with severe mental illness who is lead around like a puppet on strings first by the society that torments him for existing and then by the creature living in his walls that steals his memory and cognitive ability and manipulates him into doing his bidding. I had never seen that before? Usually I am not one for "made mentally ill by inorganic sources" trope, but the fact that it's stated in the comic that he was already seriously unwell before he became a flusher... it's just sad. He is not a good person, but his life is inherently tragic and the outcome of a society that does not care for him, or people like him, at all. forgive me for the comparison, but he is like the joker 2019. I mean this in a way that I love joker 2019. if you didn't like joker, well. sorry. but it's true.

This ties in, obviously, with the way that Jhonen goes about fiction: he does whatever he wants, to an extent. I have recently very closely befriended some individuals and while pondering how we were meshing so well on the creative side of htings, it eventually came to light that the singlemost defining moment in our lives was how we all read JTHM at a very young age. And it is insane, stepping back and looking at all of our narrative and art styles and seeing that the similarities we've all evolved independently stemmed from JTHM, in addition to our view of what it's like to be an artist. we are but jhonen's warriors in a world that is currently characterized by a very homogenized mixture of “art”. I mean, just look at the current box office trend. look at the “genre” that is marvel movies. not that I don’t enjoy marvel movies, I DO like them, my loki phase was strong and hard, but objectively... these things are what they are: mass-produced consumables. there is a reason people got excited when it was announced that Cronenberg was making a new film (which was awesome btw); art is dying. milquetoast narratives, stories afraid to push boundaries and be "weird", authors not trusting the audience to pick up on their intended message so instead of leaving it just a little ambiguous, they must instead spoonfeed it to every reader... There is some equation of what it means to make art and how it equates with your moral standing; my stance has always aligned with dear Jhonen's.

in a way my view of the world is the direct inverse of nny's; I truly believe in the best of people, I love humanity, I love the world and I am fundamentally incapable of being outwardly cruel towards others. my natural setting is to logically empathize, to put myself in the shoes of other people and look at their life the way they're living it. there is nothing more important to me than showing unconditional positive regard towards others. I have not always been this way. I used to foster great amounts of animosity in my heart for the things that have been done to me. I used to be an abjectly miserable person, I used to be violently suicidal every day for years and years and years etc. now though... I don't know how to describe it. something alights upon you after vast quantities of self-reflection, detached from the scrying eyes of swathes of people, of strangers, fandom most relevantly but I do also mean society as a whole. at this point in my life there is nothing more important to me than being a nice person, and helping others in what ways I can. if that's through posting raw depictions of mental illness, I will happily do so. I didn't realize that people didn't KNOW they can do this, and it is heartwarming that I can touch people in such a way even parasocially. I have worked on myself, I love people and I love when people are weird and their true creative selves because that is what the world needs in this day and age. art is dying. If you let bitterness into your heart it will consume you. it will cloud your judgment and prevent you from making a true connection to the medium, it will block you from making what you REALLY want to make. It will poison how you interact with other humans on a fundamental level, if you are constantly walking into interactions suspecting the worst intentions.

it almost seems like critical thinking is a dying skill...or, at least, it is when it comes to interacting with art and not relying on other people to tell you what to think. but even still I still do not hold ire towards those who seek me harm for what I make. I do not answer many of the asks I get on purpose, the death threats, etc... because these people are hurting in a multitude of ways, and they have not yet learned how to cope with their own pain. You could call being an optimist a character flaw, maybe it is. I don't know. That is, for better or worse, the epitome of what I am: an unrelenting pollyanna who believes in the best of people and the potential they have to heal. The one anon hate I got about the AU months ago that I actually deigned with an answer; they eventually came off anon and admitted they were just frustrated they didn't know how to properly use tumblr's UI to filter me off their dashboard and displaced their emotions onto me. They apologized. Such is life. We are all humans inhabiting this great big earth and I love to love people. contrary to what I depict in my art, I am a very happy person. I love my friends and I'm currently in a very good life situation with occasional downfalls and eventual upturns. Jhonen, I know, as stated in the second interview image, was often like this as well. nny was a speakerphone for little observations about life and pessimism; he was a character, a means to tell a story.

so ya I guess those are some of my thoughts about JTHM. not all of them though. here’s some nny

[sollucets]

ok so. so i made it out of midnight museum e3 alive but im gonna have to do something normal and calming for a while now because oh fuck me too many moths even like skipping scenes and cringing away from the screen. im unwell. many disorganized thoughts go here

so i Was right about dome frankly. i mean the hints were there (jib dialogue last episode + the long time no rent thing from e1) but for me it was that hes too stupid to be a full person (sorry baby i love u). like saying ‘is this normal’ about resurrection and lit. just going with whatever happens to him and running headlong into stupid situations. he literally Only just woke up. he has no brain head empty hes just doing the One thing hes been told hes good at and useful for. oh no baby :( they really keep putting him through it every episode LMAO.

got a Lot more worried khatha this episode plus a bunch more face touching. and sitting by his bedside. tor is So good with those shiny eyes of pain like … i dont know how he does that but its incredible. his face. his little tsundere look away / posture adjustment when dome woke up like you didnt literally die for this man recently. they are getting gayer each episode. again ive established i dont care about “bl status” it doesnt matter to me if they kiss but boy its just so…. they HAVE to know what theyre doing with this

i really like this show i Would Not have put myself through this for less agh. i still almost quit multiple times

that opening flashback scene with triphob’s grandfather was really good. by the way. i love immortals i love immortality. i love the moon (showing up just barely in blurry flashbacks)

bright did fucking Great this episode. im not too familiar with him, mostly from f4 thailand bits but he was so fucking creepy!!!!! tragic little murdery sadboy. what a mess. the whole house invasion scene was Sooooooooo. augh. freaky. everything he did was fucked up

i have some…. thoughts…. about the girl in this episode, rin, and her agency / lack thereof honestly. combined with the bride’s “men writing her story” thing….. its. hmmm. but i’m not sure i’m equipped to express that properly without rewatching and frankly i dont know if im capable of rewatching this episode

if i turn my lizard brain off also the vampire moths are a great horror concept and they were very aesthetically cool to someone who does not have. a lifelong fear of those fucking things

also yeah ‘cycle of death and rebirth’ confirms the reincarnation thing but i’m thinking that not only did khatha enounter past life dome / “that person” / “chan” but also like. present life pre-memories dome? and that’s why he was surprised when dome didnt remember him. it wouldnt make sense for him to be surprised a reincarnation didnt remember him. they definitely met pre-wipe

v fun to learn that june is immortal too??? but like. frankly im still so confused about her lmao. she was an immortal museum worker before this?? but she became the bride?? but they all forgot her past but she remembers being immortal and the artifacts? but she has bride magic now??? dont get me wrong i like her a lot shes great for wisdom and being the only one nice to dome but hoo boy

ok. theres all the bits in no particular order

so. yeah!!!! yeah i was so proud of myself for being mostly chill with the first two episodes of murder and body horror but uh i was NOT good with this. gods fuck why moths