#this show is v funny i like it and i like this australian guy

[cuppajj]

oh....

[fxrmuladaydreams]

i’m sorry i love you (ln4 + op81)

poly!landoscar x reader

summary: after being placed last in qualifying, oscar and his girlfriend comfort lando, but what happens when it’s revealed lando feels more deeply about the two of you than a friend should?

notes: !!CONTAINS SMUT MINORS DNI!! omg guys it’s my first ever poly!landoscar full length story

warnings: panic attack, threesome, p in v, oral (male receiving), sub!lando, dom!oscar, sub!reader

Lando practically throws his helmet into the arms of someone from his pit crew. He storms off, uncaring of any cameras that may be around to broadcast his tantrum.

He’d just finished qualifying, finished on pole position. He was going to start at the top of the grid, when the news had spread. The FIA had done checks on some of the cars, and his was against the rules. It was stupid, something that wasn’t in his control at all, yet he still had to find out in a public setting, just after he felt on top of the world.

Oscar’s car wasn’t pulled for the check, so he was still able to drive in his qualifying position tomorrow. He felt his frustration grow worse and worse the more he thought about it. This was just another chance for Oscar to show him up, to show everyone just how much better he was than Lando in his rookie year.

And yet, Lando couldn’t be mad at Oscar. He wanted nothing more than to hate the Aussie just a little, to feel some type of anger for him, but he couldn’t. Oscar was a good guy, he was nice, he was funny, he was great to be around when he finally opened up.

He was fine with this sudden fondness growing inside him for his teammate, he felt the same way about Carlos when they were teammates. Then he met you.

You were the adoring girlfriend to Oscar Piastri. Perfectly sweet, and equally beautiful. You had been nothing but nice to Lando. And there was his problem.

You and Oscar were perfect for each other. You brought him out of his shell, gave him more confidence. And he made sure to always keep a smile of your face. That was why he refused to do anything about the feelings that slowly grew in his chest for the both of you.

Lando knew that tomorrow would be hell for him. That he’d have to see Oscar do well, likely earning another podium finish, then see him scoop you up in his arms and show the whole world how much he loved you. All while Lando would have to attempt to climb back to the top of the grid just to get in the points.

He avoided anyone he could on the way back to the hotel, steering clear of reporters and McLaren workers. He drove his car back to the hotel, and strode through the lobby to the elevator with his hood pulled up over his head and dark sunglasses over his eyes.

He was able to shower, to try to scrape the shame from the day off himself before the knocking started. He figured he could just ignore it. Whoever was on the other side of the door would just assume no one was there and they’d leave. But whoever was on the other side of the door was persistent.

“Lando! We know you’re here!” The Australian accent called through the door.

Lando sighed, pulling himself up off his bed then dragged himself to the door to swing it open.

There you stood with Oscar next to you. Oscar was still in his McLaren team kit, and you were still in the same McLaren shirt you’d worn to the paddock. Neither of you had made it to your hotel room yet, too concerned with Lando’s disappearance.

“I’m not really in the mood guys-” He starts, but stops when you walk past him, entering his room.

“That was fucked. Telling you in front of all those cameras like that? What the hell?” You sit down on the bed.

Oscar gives Lando a sympathetic smile then follows you inside.

Lando was surprised by your colorful language and the anger you seemed to have for the FIA. He shrugs sitting down next to you.

“There’s nothing I can do about it.”

“Mate, if they had checked my car I’m sure we’d be in the same position.” Oscar says as he sits down at the desk across from the two of you.

“But they didn’t check your car. They checked mine. So now I’m P20, while you get to start on pole.” Lando snaps. He can feel you shrink at his sudden outburst. He sighs. “I’m sorry. I know it’s not your fault.”

His head falls to his hands as he takes a few deep breaths trying to regain his composure. He can feel your hand softly stroking up and down his back.

“You two don’t need to stay. You can go celebrate Oscar’s pole.” He says once he lifts his head back up.

His eyes are red, almost bloodshot, welling up with tears he’s refusing to let fall.

You wrap an arm through his and lace your hand with his. “We’re not leaving you alone right now Lan. We care too much about you.”

Lando groans. He stands up pulling himself away from you and takes a few steps away. He wants to put some distance between the three of you. He wants to make sure that he doesn’t let himself fall for the both of you even more than he already has.

“You can’t say shit like that.” His words are quiet.

“But it’s true.” You say standing up.

“Lando-” Oscar starts, standing up.

“Stop! Stop! You both need to stop!” Lando holds his hands out in front of him, backing away from the two of you. “I can’t-I can’t do this.” He whimpers leaning against the wall. He can feel the tear falling down his cheeks now. He quickly tries to wipe them away from his eyes.

He can feel his breathing start to pick up as his heart starts pounding in his chest. Everything is too much, too overwhelming. The qualifying results along with your insistence on comforting him has made him feel like he’s choking on nothing.

Oscar immediately clocks the panic coursing through his teammate. He slowly reaches out and pulls Lando back down to the bed. You stand up, giving him space as Oscar grabs a bottle of water from Lando’s fridge, uncapping it and handing it to him.

Lando slowly sips on the water, taking a few minutes to calm down. He closes the cap and places the bottle on the table next to the bed. When he finally looks back up at you and Oscar his eyes are filled with shame.

“I’m sorry…” He murmurs.

You sit down next to him again and wrap an arm over his shoulders. “You have nothing to apologize for Lan.” You tell him softly. “It’s okay.”

He shakes his head. “No, it’s not okay. I’m sorry I’m like this. I’m sorry you have to see me like this.”

“Mate, it’s fine, it’s okay.” Oscar says as he sits down on the other side of Lando.

Your arm slips from Lando’s shoulders as Oscar’s wraps around him, pulling his head to lean against his shoulder.

Lando finds comfort being sandwiched between the two of you. With Oscar’s arm around him and your hand now softly playing with his fingers he feels like he can finally breathe again.

“I’m sorry you guys have to help me with this, that I need you here with me…” Lando says, his voice slightly muffled in Oscar’s shoulder.

“What do you mean?” Oscar asks, looking down at him.

You hear Lando take a deep breath, lifting his head from Oscar’s shoulder, then looking back and forth between the two of you. He sits up and moves away from Oscar, pulling his hand away from yours as well.

“I’m sorry I feel the way I feel… I’m sorry I’m in love with you.” His last sentence comes out in a breath. He stands up from the bed again, trying to put some space between you. “Both of you. I’m really sorry. And I don’t want things to get awkward now, because you’re my teammate,” he gestures to Oscar “and you’re my teammate’s girlfriend,” then he gestures to you “so it’s impossible to avoid either of you after this.”

You sit on the bed silently, watching as Lando paces back and forth now, rambling about how nothing has to change, and he’ll be able to move on with time.

“We don’t want you to move on.” Oscar cuts him off.

Lando stops mid sentence. “What?” The sleeves on his hoodie fall past his hands as his fingers fidget. “What do you mean?”

“Lando,” you stand up, slowly walking towards him “we both have feelings for you too.”

“You do?”

Oscar nods. “It was weird at first, both of us admitting that we liked you to each other, but we felt like it was something we could work through. We didn’t want you to find out and get freaked about it.”

“Oh.” Lando still doesn’t look convinced as he shifts his weight on his feet.

You take a few slow steps until you’re standing in front of him, tilting his chin up so his eyes meet yours. “Can I kiss you Lando?”

He nods his head and breathes out an answer. “Yeah.”

You raise a hand to cup his face, tracing your thumb over his cheekbone. He leans into your touch, his eyes fluttering closed.

He’s almost surprised to feel your lips against his, like this was all some dream he’d made up in his head. You feel just the way he imagined, soft touches and slow intimate movements.

The hands that hold his waist do surprise him. He can tell they’re Oscar’s, the size alone makes it obvious, but he can feel them holding onto him firmly.

Oscar stands behind Lando, trailing kisses up and down the side of his neck.

Lando feels his heart pick up again, but this time for an entirely different reason. What once filled him with anxiety now sends a thrill through him. He’s excited to be with you, both of you.

He’s getting far too hot pressed between the two of you, pulling his lips away from yours to take a much needed breath.

“Should we move over to the bed? To get a little more comfortable?” Oscar asks as he softly sinks his teeth into Lando’s neck.

You pull Lando to the bed by his arm, and push him so he’s sitting down on the edge of it. Oscar sits down on his knees behind Lando, running a hand through his curls. You crawl onto Lando’s lap, straddling him as you tug at the bottom of his hoodie.

“Can I take this off?” You ask.

He’s quick to nod his head in response. You tug the hoodie up over his head and throw it to the side. His bare torso is revealed, the tanned skin on display. You reach out and run your hands down his chest, over the lines of his abs. He sighs, and leans his head back against Oscar’s shoulder.

“He’s so pretty Osc.” You say as you admire the boy under you.

“He is.” Oscar nods.

Lando blushes under your gaze, turning his head to look at Oscar. Oscar looks down at him with a smug smile on his face. He knew the affect he had on the British driver fairly early into their partnership, but finally getting to act on these pent up feelings was something new and exciting.

Oscar leans down to press a teasing kiss to corner of Lando’s mouth, smirking as Lando practically chases his lips as he pulls away.

“I think Y/n wants your attention.” Oscar nods to you.

When Lando turns back to look at you he can see that you’ve removed your McLaren shirt and bra and start to softly tug at the waistband of his sweatpants.

His hands reach out to hold your hips, pulling you closer to him as his lips attach themselves to your collarbone. His teeth leave little indents in your skin, red patches appear alongside other older marks left behind by Oscar.

You roll your hips against Lando’s as your head falls back from the pleasure. Lando whines against your chest, lifting his hips slightly to meet yours.

Oscar palms himself through his jeans as he watches you and Lando. It’s clear the two of you are starting to lose control, and he’s more than happy to take the reins.

“Is Lando making you feel good?” He asks you.

“Yes, so good.” You whimper.

“Then maybe you should make him feel good too.” He says.

You slide off of Lando’s lap, pulling his sweatpants down to his ankles. You tug your pants and underwear down and toss them to a corner of the room.

You knew that Lando was attractive, anyone with eyes would be able to see that, but you didn’t think that his cock could be just as pretty.

It’s not as long as Oscar’s, but it’s thicker, the girth alone makes a wave of arousal travel down your core. You wrap your hand around it, and softly stroke it up and down.

Lando lets out a soft groan, letting his eyes flutter closed. You climb back onto Lando’s lap, continuing to stroke him slowly as Oscar tilts Lando’s head back to him. He leans down and kisses the Brit, smirking into the kiss as Lando moans against his lips. Oscar’s hair hangs down as he kisses Lando, slightly blocking their eyes, brushing against Lando’s face.

You grind yourself against Lando’s thighs, desperate for more attention as you watch the two boys kiss.

“Can I ride you Lan?” You ask as your hand slows down against him.

Oscar pulls himself away from Lando and nods in your direction.

“Do you want her to ride you?”

“Please.” Lando whimpers.

His whines quickly turn into moans as you slowly sink yourself down on him.

He feels different than Oscar, his thick cock stretches you wider than Oscar’s has as you struggle to take all of him.

Lando struggles to hold himself back from thrusting up into you, wanting nothing more than to buried completely inside you. You’re warm and soft, and wrapped so tightly around him that he swears this is what heaven feels like.

You’re finally able to sit completely on Lando after a few minutes of rocking back and forth on him. You take a second to catch your breath before slowly grinding down further on him.

Lando can’t pull his eyes away from you until he hears the metal from Oscar’s belt clink around.

He turns to see Oscar watching him with a smirk. “She feels good, doesn’t she?”

Lando can only nod his head, his eyes squeeze shut when you start to slowly lift your hips up then sink back down onto him.

Oscar pulls his pants down, then tugs his boxers down as well. He wraps his hand around his cock, slowly pumping it. His other hand tangles itself in Lando’s hair and gives it a sharp tug backwards.

Lando huffs out a breath as he stares up at Oscar, his eyes now a bit glassy from the pleasure he feels from you. His eyes drop down to Oscar’s cock, his tongue darting out to wet his lips.

“Want a taste?” Oscar asks.

Lando leans towards him and licks a stripe up the underside of his cock, letting his tongue brush against the head and collect his precum.

Oscar sucks in a sharp breath as Lando’s tongue licks around the head. His grip in Lando’s curls gets tighter as he pushes his head closer to his cock.

Lando takes the tip into his mouth, softly sucking and swirling his tongue around it. Oscar can feel vibrations come from the occasional moan from Lando as you start to ride him faster.

The room is filled with a mix of sounds coming from the three of you. Your slick as you ride Lando, bouncing up and down on his cock, Lando gagging as he tries to take more of Oscar down his throat. And none of you are being particularly quiet. Your moans mixed with Lando’s muffled moans, and Oscar’s deep groans bounce off the walls. God help whoever had the room next door to Lando’s.

Oscar is the first to cum. How can he not when Lando looks up at him with big doe eyes as he hollows his cheeks around his cock. Lando can feel Oscar’s release shoot down his throat, the warm salty cum coming out in spurts as Oscar has his head thrown back, thrusting himself into Lando’s mouth.

You can’t help but clench around Lando at the sight. You’ve given Oscar head before, but you don’t know if it’s ever actually felt as good as what Lando had done.

Oscar’s chest heaves slightly as he pulls himself from Lando’s mouth. A string of saliva connects Lando’s lips to Oscar’s cock. Oscar gives him a lazy smile.

“Why don’t you help Y/n cum just like you helped me? Play with her.” He instructs Lando.

Lando doesn’t hesitate to move his hands to your body, playing with your tits, pinching your nipples. One of his hands finds it’s way down to where you two connect, and softly rubs at the little bundle of nerves.

You yelp and lift yourself higher on his cock before dropping down again. Your thighs feel like they’re on fire, the muscles getting sore from the constant movement. Lando presses his fingers against your clit again, now much more sure of himself than before.

Tears begin to form in your eyes as you struggle to keep your pace. Lando begins to thrust up into you to help keep the rhythm you’ve set. His arms flex as they hold himself up on the bed. Yours wrap around his neck as you bury your face in his shoulder.

“I’m gonna cum Lando.” You whimper as he presses harder against your clit.

He feels you clench around him one last time before you cum. You moan out both his and Oscar’s name as you cum, your eyes rolling to the back of your head.

Your release triggers Lando’s as he shoots his cum deep inside of you. He hold you down onto his cock as he continues to thrust up into you, pushing his cum as far as he can in you.

You slowly peel yourself off of Lando, whining at the empty feeling between your legs. You glance over at the two boys now laying down on the bed. Both are covered in a light sheen of sweat. Oscar has now pulled his shirt off as he lays back, softly stroking Lando’s hair.

You lay down on Lando’s other side, resting your head on his chest.

“That was… wow.” He says, his voice a little gruff. “Is it like that every time?”

“We don’t have threesomes Lan.” You softly giggle. “We only sleep with people we love.” You press a soft kiss to his flushed chest.

“So you better get used to it, because now you’re stuck with us.” Oscar tells him as he buries his face in Lando’s neck.

You and Oscar let sleep wash over you, wrapped up around the British driver, who just smiles to himself pulling the two of you closer to him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you that I loved you sooner.” He whispers into the darkness.

[faunandfloraas]

Aussie question time: when I find out an idol is American/Canadian, their image in my mind completely changes because now it’s like “Oh I know exactly who you are, I grew up with your type around me” there are subtleties that I’m going to understand that others might not. So with all that said, I’ve been curious about what that’s like (if you experience it) w the skz aussies (throw in a lily if you’re feeling it -v-) 🎤

this is wayyyyyy too long so I'm putting it under a read more- also disclaimer: i dont know these guys and these are just my opinions, dont take em too srs <3

Hmmmm... Well I guess I'll start with Felix- I've said it before a bunch but the whole "Felix is a tiny uwuw baby sweet summerchild who is just such a baby" etc. etc. has made me laugh from the get go- because Yep! he is incredibly sensitive and sweet natured and kind and he cries a lot- 100% that is true. Dont think I'm saying it's not. But like. He also grew up in western sydney, he grew up in a area that if you google it one of the first suggestions is "is it safe" but then at the same time he went to private catholic school im pretty sure. and i saw pics from back then that he'd posted back in the day of cool little felix with his gold watch and his fade and all his little homeboys looking rowdy on the train- I know that kid and while that kid can also be sweet and sensitive, he's not incapable and hes not a baby. Good recent example was when he went on that Jewel box show with the gay dudes and people were acting like he was *so uncomfortable* and sooooo out of his element and so this and so that- theres gay dudes all over sydney, there's gay dudes all over australian media- the idea felix couldnt handle that was simply laughable to me- but it kinda shows how many outside perceptions of him still very much fall into that vaguely infantalizing thing. Like when he was the one who was happy to go up to adam levine and dj snake in that skz talker while the other boys were much more shy? that didnt shock me at all. felix went to korea as a whole teenager laregly against his parent wishes- he's actually quite an outgoing and brave guy. Outgoing guys can still be sweeties, though- one doesn't negate the other.

One other aspect of Felix i think a lot of fans just gloss over but is easily noticeable by me is that he can kindaaaaaa be ... a lil bitchy? like he's never ever mean or cruel dont get me wrong- but he has a slight bitchy streak, he rolls his eyes AND he's actually much more sarcastic than people bring up? Again- he does it a lot with Chan and that doesnt shock me- they both are aussie boys, Chan will get it and I think Felix can very much be himself with Chan, he doesn't necessarily feel the need to put up an extra air of like... Sweetie boy-ness? bc when he calls chan a cunt on live chan just laughs and goes OI!! so yuh the main thing with felix is while i do think hes a little sweet guy, ive never from the get go had a hard time seeing him outside of that box, too. Also maybe that's a lil bit aussie humour slipping under the radar here or there 🤔

Chan to me from the get go too was pretty much like. Prototypical overachieving aussie Good Boy. Like, i had a drafted post i never posted bc it was too niche- but it was essentially about how he speaks about sports and the like, and it just said "We get it. You went to zone carnival" which was the sporting event that the kids who got gold or 1st place were sent to. If you went to zone, you were the Successful kid. I think these days most fans perceive him as... a bit of a goofy guy? but I have gone through the archives and i have seen the comments from people talking about how chans such a bad boy- thats shit is so funny to me bc you can show me every iteration of chan and I'd never, ever think he's a bad boy. Like he wishes he was a bad boy, he kinda cosplays a bad boy- even him referencing swearing bc of his australianess and shit over the years makes me giggle a little bc i feel like felix def 100% swears all the time but he doesnt like Smirk about it too much? he doesnt really bring it up? things like that stand out, it to me feels very like Oh yeah I'm this naughty Aussie boy who swears hehe and then all the australians are like ? Girl we all do huh lmao

Otherwise, I dont have as much to say about chan as i do about felix, funnily. Like idk people might perceive differently to me, but nothing too far off? I will say that given Chan's success and the fact he was seemingly a very well achieving kid too (maybe not debuting for such a long time is part of this) he is WAY more humble than I'd expect. Like not to besmirch Australian men but a lot of them can be really loud and cocky, especially the famous successful ones (any sport star) it's almost encouraged to be like that if you're a dude (but only to a certain degree, anything beyond a certain point and you'll be roasted lol) So I have to give credit where it's due and say that Chan *Seemingly does have a very good nature and I appreciate that about him! Its probably why I like him so much bc he actually very much doesn't give off those vibes- he doesn't seem like that overly macho cocky bloke I know very well. So that makes him good fun for me- he's very successful and he's confident and yet he doesn't activate any of my bitch instincts- thats impressive! I don't know him, so I'll never know for sure of course, i feel like i need to make that disclaimer but still I do believe he has a good heart, and he tries so hard! and I appreciate that.

Lily is weirdly like Chan. like she's hilariously like chan tbh- I wonder how they really get along sometimes bc I feel like they might look at each other and be like Hm... we the same............ ? Lmao I will say though, lily is a bit out of pocket and half of that I believe is her personality but half of it is just.... I think she's just australian 😭 like i cant lie you get me as a teenager to early 20 something and put me on a live and I can promise I would be saying as much ?? shit. Like, I do think Australians are a little loud and not necessarily always.... tactful (again Not everyone, but yk.) lily certainly fits that bill to a T. I appreciate that regardless of her idolhood she does still say things that maybe she shouldn't, she shrugs off a shoplifting confession, she says she'd murder someone if she had to, she bought and wore a shirt that fans quickly tracked down and found out all the proceeds were going to Palestine- she would have known what that suggested. she clearly had this goal of being an idol since she was a baby, like literal baby but she hasn't sacrificed her broader personality, even the parts that could potentially be off-putting to those idol fans that expect perfection and nothing else. I appreciate that in her! and I hope she never loses her little weird girl spark bc it does make her very dynamic! Her slightly gruff aussie girlness is very fun for me to see in the idolsphere bc it def feels out of place, but in a refreshing way...

so yeah. Idk if this was sensical, I was making dinner so I put my phone down a bunch and it's probably disjointed but thats my opinion... my thoughts, my ideas! Idk my take on them. Thanks for asking 🫡

[bigtittiecomitte]

Episode 7 predictions since it’s 2024

1. N and Uzi kiss scene

This one’s pretty simple, I really want to see them kiss, you want to see them kiss, everyone wants to see them kiss

2. Nori and Yeva flashback scene

I really do think that teaser that Glitch posted is a flashback with Nori and Yeva trying to find the cure too, it would make sense for them too especially with their connection to the Absolute Solver and the camp

The theories are nice but I don’t think that Nori and Yeva would just show up out of the blue randomly especially when they’re supposed to be dead, it made sort of sense with Doll but doesn’t make sense with those two cause why the hell did it take that long to come back, just seems like a flashback to me, also this would be good for some content on what not only were they like but also hopefully mention of Khan and Uzi from Nori’s mouth cause we still have no idea if Nori is even a good guy

3. Separation

It seems like from the trailer that N, Uzi and Tessa are going to be seperated. This would be good for some good sweet character development and how they handle things alone, Tessa might be looking at the dorms? Lockers? Idk what they are but of the patients especially Nori’s and hers might have something deeply puzzling Tessa because she full on slammed the door lol

4. Nuzi confession scene

Should’ve probably put this in first but I’m HOPING that N and Uzi confess their feelings, especially with the fact that they might die I’d be happy if they at least confessed before Episode 8 (the last episode) so we can see them being happy with each other before the angst

5. N shirtless

6. More Tessa scenes

I know girlie is really suspicious at the moment and I absolutely despise her for the whole kill Uzi thing but I actually really like Tessa she’s so quirky and so unaware of things it’s kinda funny

I love you Australian woman I still hate you for the kill Uzi thing tho

7. Fluff moments

As you know I hate angst, it makes me sad ☹️

8. Merch

I hope there’s more merch of characters that never got the chance to have some merch, as much as I love the N and Uzi merch there is not a lot of merch with the other characters like J, Tessa, Cyn, etc

Even V, I don’t want her to be in the episode but I think that she’s gotten at least 5 pieces of merch? Can’t really tell but I hope that J fans do get that plushie

I hope they make more keychains and stickers too, posters would be nice as well or even mats. Just some new pieces of merch instead of plushies, pins and Animatez (as much as I love them, I do hope that’s not all of it)

9. The absolute solver fucks off

I hate the absolute solver my girl could die because of it grrrraahhhhhh 😡🤬

That’s it, like share and subscribe for more content 😎

[hughiecampbelle]

Eek! I’ve never heard of this whole ship request thing before, but it sounds super cool and super fun :) could I have one with anyone in the boys except for, like, the evil ones? Like deep, Homelander, firecracker, etc etc? Hate them sm

I’m a trans guy and I’m bisexual :) I’m actually from the Deep South, but I have heritage in Canada and Mexico. I’m also autistic so I have some sensory problems with noises and textures, and I get really panicked about needles. I am, however, unreasonably obsessed with things. Like many shows and music. (Coincidentally at the time of writing this I physically cannot stop listening to Billy Joel- he’s currently my lifeline during sensory overloads and panic attacks) I’ve also learned enough French to vaguely understand things, hold the first few seconds of a conversation, and roughly translate a lot of texts. It’s not very impressive. I know some ASL, and I use it when I go nonverbal (due to my autism). I have this funny habit of randomly changing my voice and my accent- like if I get excited or stressed out I’ll start being German, French, British, Australian, Russian, Scottish, New York, Canadian, or anything in between. Music is kind of just- my life. It’s my everything.

sorry if this ends up similar to other ship asks you get- but it’s really cool, so thanks for considering it :)

Hi my love! I ship you with: Hughie!!! He loves when you find new interests. There's always something new that's catching your attention, something new that's comforting and cool. He adores that there's so much in the world that you can fall in love with. It helps that you've become infatuated with Billy Joel. You two could listen for hours. It brings a smile to both your faces. Hughie hums along, afraid to sing and mess it all up, but you love the sound of his voice. You're constantly making niche playlists for one another, sharing them when you can't sleep. Hughie wants you to know that he took the time to listen, giving you individual feedback about each song. You love how awkward he is. He's tall and gangly and hasn't yet learned how to exist as he is. You think it's cute that he's a little clumsy, coming to his rescue with band-aids or ice, that he fumbles over his words and is constantly trying to re-explain himself. There's something charming about it, something sweet that instantly gets your attention. Your relationship is easy-going. Despite all the drama with Vought and Homelander and Compound V, you and Hughie have a really stable, easy relationship. There are no mind games, there's no questioning or defensiveness. When you're having issues, you talk it out. He'd never want to hurt you and you'd never want to hurt him. He's been through a lot lately with his dad and that awful Tek Knight party. You make it known you're there for him when he's ready to talk. You're not overly affectionate, but you do hold hands a lot. Especially after something's happened, something bad or scary, you squeeze one anothers hands, making sure the other person knows you're there. Your first date is takeout and a movie. You were supposed to go to the movies, but after the day you've had, after what you've seen and been through, you both come to the mutual conclusion that it would be better just to stay in. You barely even watch the movie, instead you spend the night talking and laughing, unpacking what's happened recently. It's so ridiculous you can't help but laugh at it. Hughie promises, for your next date, if there is a next date, that he'll take you out. You don't mind what happens as long as there is a second date, and third, and fourth. Relationship Headcanon: Hughie learns sign language for you. Or at least, he's trying to. His hands are clumsy and he often gets the signs wrong, but he's doing his best. He's better at understanding it than actually doing it. He wants to be able to better communicate with you when you become non-verbal. He wants to be able to help you, too. He never wants to speak for you, but with your permission, he shares your thoughts and ideas with the group when you can't.

Hope you like it my love!!! Xoxoxo💜💜💜

[lakecoded]

8 shows to get to know me. tagged by @thehitchikerdude :)

supernatural 😔 (self explanatory) (gave me brainworms at 13 AND at 20)

please like me. i legitimately watch this like once a year and sob through the last 2 episodes every time.

black sails. show of all time. a story is true a story is untrue. wough 😵‍💫 have never been able to fully rewatch this show

the oa. watched this in april 2020 and SOBBED for 2 straight hours after finishing the second season because it was cancelled. its SO good and SO sexy (the house in s2 that eats people. my god....) and SO beautiful. forever mad it got cancelled because the cliffhanger makes me so crazy (i simply love when actors play themselves in things). jason isaacs

murdoch mysteries. well this show is not good (and is somehow still running) but i was Obsessed with it in middle/high school which has to count for something

dispatches from elsewhere. this show made me so crazy i genuinely believed the characters were going to walk out of my television screen and into real life. v funny and v heartfelt and also richard e grant is there to monologue at the camera

taskmaster. its fun! i love watching comedians fail to do tasks. shoutout to the guy on youtube who's uploading the new seasons :) also the new zealand and australian versions are v good

halt and catch fire. i watched this while i was quarantining in a hotel for 2 weeks and joe macmillan is the character of all time. keot yelling HE'S A PERSON at my laptop screen because he's real to me

tagging @taros @liapher @bettysweep @blacksails2014 + @werewolfcafe ❣️

[thoughts-of-the-unheard]

so im rewatching the secret circle for like the dozenth time bc im one poster short of obsessed and i downloaded the cw seed app a few years ago specifically to watch it and anyway the episode synopsis’ are so funny like “Deciding that “moody teenage witch” might not be a great look, Cassie soft passes on binding the Circle.” “Cassie and Faye try to discover what really happened to their parents and end up unleashing a demon. Whoops.” “The Witch Hunters are very on brand as they choose Halloween to kidnap the Circle.” “Jake’s crushing hard on Cassie. Now he has to figure out that sworn oath to hunt down all witches thing.” “More people want to kill Cassie, but her powers say otherwise. Faye meets a very hot guy way too into voodoo.” “Adam’s into Cassie, who’s bffs with Diana...who’s Adam’s ex...and Faye wants to steal all of their powers for herself.” “Jake and his v-neck are back, and he may finally have the answers Cassie needs.” “Cassie flirts with dark magic, Adam flirts with Cassie and Melissa flirts with “The Devil’s Spirit.”” “It’s a witches sleepover and only crushes, exes, and dark magic are invited.” “Can the Circle trust Cassie’s mysterious and unnecessarily hot father?” “Diana dates a mortal, but he’s like an Australian mortal. And Faye finds out Lee has a girlfriend. Boo.” “Family secrets and magic do not mix, and like way too many people in L.A. the Circle gets deep into crystals.” “Cassie struggles with her dark magic, but like who hasn’t? And sorry, what’s happening between Adam and Melissa?” “Grab your crystals and corsages, cause its Prom! Diana finds something out that leaves her s h o o k.” “Faye’s kidnapped so good luck to her kidnappers. Cassie, Dianna, and Blackwell team up to try and stop the Witch Hunters.” theyre so funny these arent all of them just the funniest ones but they are in order so yea i love this show and whoever wrote these

[arkus-rhapsode]

Rhapsode Reacts: RWBY Volume 3

Hey guys, Rhapsode here. So I’ve been on the record numerous times saying I haven’t watched the internet series RWBY. I haven’t. However, I have a rather close mutual @remnantoforario who tells me about most of the series and characters. Seriously, I basically have experienced the plot through osmosis. Now me and remnant work on a lot of fanfiction stuff and general discussions of video games and manga. And highly suggest anyone who wants a more in depth look at RWBY to please check him out. He’s great.

Now due to the fact he has basically told me the series up this point, its kinda been a bit frustrating when I forget something and ask him to reiterate. So I decided to knuckle down and watch some of the series.

I helped remnant get a non RWBY fan opinion, by basically live-blogging him in our PMs. And I thought I had some level of humorous reactions and Remnant had some witty observations to my reactions.

Anyway, if you didn’t catch it the first time, I must repeat, I’m not coming at this from the perspective of a fan. I have very little emotional or personal enjoyment going in the series up to this point. If I say something that offends you as a fan, I’m sorry in advance.

With that out of the way, let’s dive in:

Oh that’s a sweet scene of Ruby at her mother’s grave.

Why would you start Team RWBY’s preliminary fight in the middle of it?

the Vytal Festival feels like it should be reversed: you should start with 1, then go to 2, then for your finals, 4. Or just do a solid 4 v 4 all tournament

Remnantoforario: I dont know what the purpose of the tournament is, or why anyone would want to participate. There is no prize 

Me: Bragging rights I guess. But the whole point of the festival is to celebrate peace. Lets celebrate piece with a bunch of kids beating each other up .

Ruby has a line of "we did it?" like she was surprised. Was that a concern? 

Like I understand the festival has been built up since the second volume, but there's a reason most good tournament arcs ease you into the first round. Its to reaffirm character motivation and actually show you what a fight would look like 

  I do appreciate some of the “show don't tell” moments like the one girl using a heat crystal in her skate board to free her teammate

But usually even if the first round is jobbers, they're at least presented as a threat. I never really got that. The tide seemed more and Rwby's favor, but I can't tell if that was always the case because we started in the middle of the fight

the pacing just feels like you can't handle the story, so it wants to get to the fight scenes to keep your attention 

Emerald is actually really funny, holy shit 

“How can they be so happy?” And “It’s the heiress and the bimbo” 

Still Weiss and Yang, better savor this duo while I can 

Neo’s gothic Lolita is cute. Though I feel like their match should’ve gotten a focus 

Like I mean not an episode but if they started with the instant eliminations of 1v1, I could easily see this cool intro of Rwby has met Emerald, Mercury, and Cinder, but then is shocked at who this fourth member even is 

OK I feel like the scene with Rwby and JNPR should’ve happened before the first round.  Given Nora’s rant would actually tie to Ruby’s whole “we won?” Surprise

“Cinder: Even if you know how the story ends that doesn’t make it any less fun to watch.” I’d agree with you if you know the story wasn’t Rwby. And it’s not really that fun to watch a bunch of fighting with no weight.

OK team JNPR vs team BRNZ is actually a much better introduction to the tournament than Rwby vs Abrn

We actually see how the field is chosen and we actually get some genuine strategy and coordination. And before all this we actually get some motivation about how the characters feel going into this battle

Me: OK why are these not the protagonists and why was this not episode one?

Remnantoforario: questions for the writers 

I got admit I’m not very much of a fan of melee weapons that also turn into guns and just kind of makes the purpose of melee fighters and ranged fighters pointless 

Logically it makes sense that if you’re making a weapon you do want it to have multiple functionality but at the same time it kind of makes a lot of that fighting less fun 

I mean what do you want to see more a team complete each other or just one person who can just do everything with the right weapon?

  Ehh OK the team meeting joke is running a tad too long

Okay, that was what I was mentioning before... Just cut out Nora with missiles. I feels more like a give and take as well as more unique to have that moment with her slamming on the ground 

“Crow Bar.” Oh you go to the corner for that pun.

OK that joke with Weiss and telling Indigo to beat up Neptune was timed and delivered really bad 

Also port makes a point that Sun is from Vacuo. Wouldn’t it be interesting if the leader or any membr of Indigo actually did know Sun from Vacuo?

I say that because no member of team Indigo has said anything, and it would at least add something unique to this fight

OK I have to bring up the weird use of western cartoon comedy

Neptune running up the mountain it’s super speed is kind of funny but this is also a fight I’m supposed to take seriously 

Nora and Ruby kind of get away with it given their powers but Neptune just ran up a mountain like it was nothing

What is the tone here?

Sage went out like a bitch 

you know if you wanted to eliminate someone to make me feel for this team being in trouble why didn’t you just eliminate Neptune? 

OK scarlet’s scene actually really works 

That nut joke didn’t. Again, tone? 

Me: Why would you sacrifice the two characters we don’t know anything about just to do Neptunes stupid joke?

Remnant: COMEDY 

OK this fight was bad 

Me: I get the idea indigo was a bunch of jobbers so you decided to play the comedy angle. OK, well then tone down the serious rock music, turn down the cartoon physics

Remnant: For reference. That was a post Monty fight 

I agree with Qrow, that was a mess

okay introduction to Winter is pretty good. Shame we don't really get that "Novice victory" vibe from their fight. Maybe if it last for more than 8 minutes and didn't start from the middle... 

okay see, I don't mid Winter and Qrow having a fight in the middle of the square as it helps serve as an introduction to the characters and flexes their strength

though Im also starting to notice something else that bugs me in the fights, no banter or introspection or comments

its just fight moves 

like there's times that's god, DBZ did it tons of times when its just Goku making "Hiyah" noises but there was still a bit of time to get in a line that both broke up the action and highlighted how two characters felt or through thought was able to give us a peek into their head

watching rwby fights makes me think, "This be better as a video game" 

so... does no woman in this world wear a bra? 

 Ironwood: “If you were one of my men, I'd have you shot!”

Okay, that can't be legal

Ironwood is kinda becoming my favorite character 

He's a flawed human being, and the narrative shows that, but it also shows he has a point 

Okay, yeah I see what you mean, all this Fall stuff is happening in the background which is nice, but there's no real plot with the tournament 

Okay Mercury and Emerald vs Coco and Yatsuhashi is actually really good 

not much character, but its actually more intimidating seeing how strong these two are. Wish the music had a bit more ambiance 

Okay, that's an interesting plot point. Qrow explaining how beating one high profile criminal hasn't stopped crime. And the fact there is zero crime is concerning and relating it back to Ironwood

Wow, its almost when you just slow down and lt characters breath and talk to each other and have them be characters without shoving in a fight scene, its pretty good

Why is team Cardin fighting a non faunus team? Feels like a waste of characters 

disappointing that Ciel doesn't know Penny is a robot

mainly because the way its queued up with Ciel seemed like she was only spending time with Penny because ordered and her attention to the schedule makes it seem like she is a soldier just having to play dress up for the robot to make it comfortable 

Me: Wow Weiss's heels...  Never noticed them. I just thought they were boots

Remnant: Nope heels 

Also Neon and Flynt actually have a pretty good intro 

We know what Atlas is like seeing Winter and Ironwood, so Neon and Flynt make an interesting and immediate contrast

And it feels like there is something riding on our opponents side given Flynts history with the Schnee. Which makes him stand out from the other jobbers

And Neon's intentionally irritating personality actually is more character displayed by any other opponent character

I actually really like the OST in the fight too. This might be my favorite action scene 

Flynt actually has a really cool semblance too 

oh wow, some actual dread with Weiss getting eliminated 

Imma let you get away with that Hulk reference Port

I like how Yang beat Flynt, but if I was gonna beat Neon, I'd have Yang punch the ground and through her off balance 

Haha Ironwood doesn't have a heart, I get it, he's tin man 

least they didn't go with Ozpin saying Qrow doesn't have a brain 

Me: So... If Pyrrha is all these things, why aren't we following her team?

So abridged version of the four seasons story Four random chicks find a guy camped out in his house, be nice to him and he gives them super powers. If I were a kid being told that, I’d demand another story 

Pyrrha: like a semblance?

Oz: Like magic!

Me: Like a semblance

Qrow is right, this selection is stupid 

You’re keeping a woman in your basement in cryogenic suspension. Oz you and Rhea need to share notes 

Oh god... Adam. You can’t act

Adam seems already psychopathic Or maybe that’s just his acting

So this is the famous Yang punching Mercury... It works I guess

Actually getting a chance to see some Jaune and Pyrrha moments in v3 and it’s good 

Me: Velvet is British? Huh... never predicted that 

Remnant: Australian 

How can Ruby notice Emerald all the way across the arena? Actually wait she’s the only one not in a black uniform 

Why did they leave Mercury behind where anyone could find him? 

And Penny is dead and I do not care at this point

Cinder’s little speech is the first time I’m actually feeling like I’m getting a villain motivation out of her 

She talks about how Oz and the headmasters are just men capable of making mistakes But she’s someone who would embrace and all powerful godly being. Though that seems and odds with the presumed motive that she’s working with Salem to potentially kill the brother gods

Okay, Blake and Weiss have a pretty good scene when all hell was breaking loose 

Ruby versus the big ass bird was actually pretty cool and the scene of everyone’s lockers being what puts it down is really clever 

Oh really cool scene of Port and Oobleck. Hey the fall is turning out pretty decent

Ironwood killing the wolf was pretty good 

Roman is a breath of fresh air as a villain. And it’s namely his acting 

You know I feel like you could let the more tertiary characters fight the robots while Weiss and Blake fight WF 

OK I repeat this is just become a video game. Giant dragon that spawns mini monsters in a destroyed town 

The spectacle fighting actually really works when your opponents are mindless and faceless brutes

You have Adam in a school full of terrified people, why aren’t you showing his nuance by showing he won’t hurt Faunus staff and is giving them an out? 

Velvet’s scene be cool if it was powers she was mimicking. Looking at a lot of weapons really doesn’t do much for me.

That said, this could work if she ended up copying the mech and fighting against it

Okay I feel like Weiss finally being able to summon something should’ve been done with a lot more gravitas

And Sun proceeds to be the best male character 

Neo is fucking beast. Y’know what, let her be final boss

Now I just have this image of Neo flying through the air with a sign reading “I’m Mary Poppins, Y’all”

Wow, Roman went out like a bitch 

Like zero build up just dead. And his replacement is Adam... There is no justice 

Ironwood: someone has done the unthinkable and taken control of my machines!

Watts: What? Like it’s hard? 

Blake and Yang holding hands on the ground after Yang lost an arm. Yeah that’s pretty shippy 

Also, I feel like the animation really limits a lot of the characters expressions. Like the time Ruby spent dwelling on her sister being mutilated is well timed. But usually a lot of the emotional devastation comes down to the expression.

a lot of faces seem stiff in transition expressions. Or they have this doll like quality 

The most expressive person seems to be Emerald 

Pyrrha and Jaune’s kiss is actually really tender 

Me: Okay how the hell is Cinder’s dress still managing to cover her loins? 

Remnant: maiden magic.

And Pyrrha died 

Are you done with the whole line of do you believe in destiny was fine Personally I would’ve also accepted the Ted Kord response, Rot in Hell.

Ruby went super saiyan 

Tai being the first person Ruby sees is nice 

Yang’s bitterness works here. Though given how I wasn’t feeling too much of the sisterly bond between the two, it’s probably not as hard hitting as they wanted 

Salem’s introduction isn’t bad 

so after watching V3. my final opinion is meh 

Strikes me as they wanted to the fall, and the tournament was just a lot of window dressing. Because the stuff with the Fall is the best part, but everything else has felt dull and fillery.

Maybe I’ll do this for the next season of a series I binge. But till next time, take care.

[bts-speakyourself]

20 to One Incident 😬

⚠️Warning: If there is any wrong information in this blog please let me know! I don’t want to give any false information. I’m going to try to not make this blog to long.

If you’ve been on Twitter for the past two days and you’re an ARMY, you know better than anyone how other ARMYs have felt when it came to a segment covering BTS. An absolutely racist and disrespectful segment. To those who might not know here’s a summary of the situation:

Summary:

20 to One is an Australian TV show (on Channel 9) and basically they countdown the top 20 global crazes placing BTS as No. 18 and let me tell you, once the segment was released there were at least three hashtags that were trending on Twitter overnight.

#channel9apoligiz(s)e

#channel9apoligiz(s)etoBTS

#fireAlexWilliamson

Don’t worry, I promise the third hashtag will make sense as I go on. Rather than writing what happened in the segment, the following tweet has the full two minute segment that was covered about BTS. If I’m being honest.....I wasn’t even able to watch the whole thing AT ALL.

There are a few common words that ARMY has used to describe this segment which are:

Disgusting

Racist

Xenophobic

Disrespectful

Then amazingly enough when things were already on fire, more wood was added by Alex Williamson who didn’t post one, but many more tweets adding to the fire. The following was the first tweet that he has posted supporting the segment of 20 to One.

Honestly, the various replys that ARMY made were amazing! There is one tweet that actually caught my attention which was, “Us 14 y/o’s also sold out a 3.5 star wine that Jungkook drank. Don’t forget that.” This reminded me when Jungkook revealed what fabric softer he used and the next thing you know, it was sold out. 😂

The obvious thing ARMY asked for was an apology from those involved in the segment, and I believe a representative of Channel Nine as well for letting them air the segment, since many ARMYs did mention that it did not follow an regulations and was considered defamation. This was what we got:

“As a lighthearted entertainment program, it is our belief that last night’s episode of 20 to One, which highlighted the ‘Greatest Global Crazes’, did not breach any broadcast regulations, and was intended to humorously highlight the popularity of the group. We apologise to any who may have been offended by last night’s episode.”

As for Alex.....let’s just say he didn’t really apologize at all and still kept being quite disrespectful.

End of Summary

I hope the summary helped you guys of the current situation! Now this is my opinion on the situation currently.

I honestly agree with how racist it is and it’s disrespectful as well knowing how hard they worked throughout their career and the tough times they went through. Of course I would like to give my opinion on the whole segment but that’s going to take too long so I’ll give my opinion on four things, three from the segment and the fourth opinion will be about the apology.

‘only one member actually speaks English’

As we know, Namjoon is amazing at English and learned it by watching the American show Friends. But pointing that out that’s a way of belittling them. As ARMYs we know that they try to at least speak a bit of the language for the fans so they can communicate us which is honestly amazing. I’m sure if they wish it, they would want the ability to speak all languages to be able to speak out to us and to able to express more of themselves. But because of their actions we know that they love us hence the quote, “actions speak louder than words.”

Gangster names

This was a bit of a surprise when I first heard it. As I mentioned I didn’t see the full segment because I couldn’t bare to watch anymore. But then I saw this floating around, so I’m guessing they mentioned it towards the end of the segment. I did a bit of research about stage names because my arrogant self didn’t really question why any Kpop idol had a stage name. So this is what I dug up.

I’m still a bit iffy about the process of choosing a stage name but I read that they really don’t have a choice and that their stage name is chosen for them, but idols can later on change their stage name if they wanted to. But the question is why do they have stage name in first place? Apparently it’s so that they can attract more people because they believe that by having an “old” sounding name they wouldn’t attract many people. Some idols tho, have a special meaning behind their stage maybe even a special reason.

J-Hope

The reason why his stage name is J-Hope is because he hopes he can become people’s hope. Hence the introduction “I’m your hope, you’re my hope, I’m J-Hope.”

Suga

Suga on the other hand was a stage name that was given to him from BangPD I believe. The reason why Suga was chosen is because his smiles are sweet like sugar.

RM

Another example is RM. Now here’s the thing, RM changed his stage name. Currently the initials of his stage name means Real Me and I’m guess what that means is that he’s showing ARMYs the real him. Now what about Rap Monster? Well I’m just going on a whim here and guess that the reason for the previous stage name is because of his amazing ability of rapping. Honestly I’m not going to talk about the other stage names he had cause that’s going to take too long. 😂

V

Last but not least, V! If you’ve been an ARMY even before the debut of BTS then you know very well that V was th last member to be introduced to BTS. During the time they wanted to make V like the mystery member and kept him hidden in hopes to attract more people. He was given the choice between Lex, Six, and V. He chose V because the members thought it fits him well.

‘I’m going to say....hair products.’

As we already know, BTS was able to speak at the UN. Namjoon, gave a speech about self respect which was amazing and a huge accomplishment for their career. During the segment they did mention that they did indeed gave a speech at the UN so they did do a little research but what they said afterwards is flat out ridiculous. They said that the speech that they gave at the UN was most likely about hair products... I’m beyond speechless honestly.

Speech less because could you imagine how nervous they were? Could you imagine how much time they prepped and wrote and try to find out the right words to write such a great speech? It’s not like writing an essay for a school assignment, they’re writing for the public to hear and presenting to not just the leaders of the UN but to those who may be watching as well. It’s a big deal because they’ve been noticed and had made a great impact to us.

If you haven’t yet, I recommend watching the full UN speech!

I had to share but out of all the videos, Jimmy Fallon’s segment about the speech of the UN was amazing and cracked me up. 😂

Honestly the part where they made it so that a representative was hearing Fake Love when Trump was giving out his speech was amazing. 😂 Then came along a few minutes of roasting Trump was also funny.

Apology

So this will be my last opinion. What is my opinion about the apology that the representative of channel 9 gave and the tweet from 20 to One. Honestly... I’m not satisfied with it at all. I agree with ARMY that they need to publicly apologize for the racist and disrespectful segment. The way 20 to One apologized is not ok and it’s kinda like they’re not admitting to their fault. “Light hearted entertainment,” do you really think the whole two minute segment was “light hearted.”

No it’s not light hearted at all. They even made us look like crazy fans. But I don’t mind it because ARMY has accomplished a bunch of projects in honor of BTS. Projects like helping the environment, helping conserve the koalas (specifically in honor of RM). I mean, let’s not mention how litteraly there is a koala named Koya in a Australian zoo. ARMYs have donated to US organizations that assist disadvantaged kids around the world (specifically in honor of Suga). Then Mexican ARMY outdid themselves when they acted as a human barricade when BTS were arriving at the airport for K-Con Mexico!

Of course, there are many more projects that AMRYs have done in the past that we all need to be proud of. I’m also proud of the project as well that’s been done for the boys.

Last but not least Alex. He didn’t really give an apology at all and it’s really not worth mentioning it. If you want you can check it out through his Twitter.

Anyway, this is my opinion of the situation and what has happened so far. I’m going to end it here since this is already long blog.

I purple you guys! 💜 Let’s keep making BTS proud!

[district2001]

Bon Voyage Season 3 Episode 2 (BTS x 8th Member Imagine)

PAIRING: BTS x 8th Member (female)

GENRE: Minimal fluff, good old humour

WORDS: 2k (whoahh)

Summary: Join BTS as they begin the third season of 'Bon Voyage.' In Episode 2, the gang (gucci gang- ayyy) participate in some challenged to win some food.

A/N: please message me or reply to this about what adventures you want to see in BV 3 Xx ALSO ALSO Enjoy the reference to another kpop group (won’t give away any spoilers). But this is the perfect opportunity to ask yall to send me some (group which shall not be mentioned ) requests. ALSO WHO GUESSED THE SONG!

Part 1

As soon as Y/N stepped off the plane, she felt the bright sun hit her eyes. She was quite literally blinded. And she was wearing sunglasses.

Her right hand gripped tightly to the railing of the stairs, whilst her left hand was holding the handle of her suitcase.

"Let me take that for you, my lady" Y/N giggled, as Hoseok grabbed her suitcase from her. Always a true gentleman.

She stepped down the wobbly stairs, taking in her surrounding. To be honest, it was nothing special, just a bunch of boring buildings with a backdrop of blue sky. It didn't scream Australia. Then again, she knew that she was being too quick to judge. She walked across the tarmac, followed closely by her boys- all tired from the flight.

Soon they reached one of the private rooms, where they would find out more about their Australian journey. Whilst the crew were setting up the mic's, the Bangtan boy's and girl sat lazily on the single sofa in the room. Kookie was lying on Suga's shoulder, whilst V was sitting on Jimin's lap. Poor J-Hope hadn't even made it to the couch and was laying on the ground. At least it was carpeted

Once everything was set up, and J-Hope was still on the ground, a member of the producing team gave out a bunch off papers.

"We're not rejumbling words again" Namjoon scoffs in annoyance.

"No we're not going to torture you like that again" Relieved, Namjoon relaxes back on the couch.

"Instead, here are a bunch off quick mini games you will be playing to win over the food you will be eating when you spend the next day here in Sydney."

Everyone, including J-Hope, perks up. Food was their weakness.

"Each of you will choose a piece of paper, which has a mini game written on it. If you beat a member of staff, then you will get the food in a portion size of 9."

"Leader goes first," Y/N shouts, clearly wanting to eat, whilst not wanting to get yelled at first for loosing.

Namjoon walks towards the camera, and picks out the green piece of paper.

"Why you take my favourite colour," J-Hope exclaims.

"You should've gone first then" Namjoon sasses back.

He then opens the paper, and in black sharpie it reads 'Don't answer the question.' Classic.

"You will be playing for meat pies, an Australian Delicacy."

Y/N sighs. This game wasn't Namjoon hyungs strong point. She loved him to death. But she could kiss her chances of eating a pie filled with curry goodbye. Nevertheless, she screams out a "GO NAMJOON HYUNG" at the top off her lungs. She was his biggest supporter.

"What is a capital of Australia"

"The sun is very bright. I am going to melt"

"He wouldn't know the answer to that anyway."

Namjoon turned around a pretended to throw his cap at Jimin, the latter flitching, bracing himself for impact.

"What are you going to eat?"

"Y/N was snoring on the plane."

"HEYYYYYY"

"Where are you?"

"QANTAS is Australia's national airline."

"AHHHHHHH" J-Hope shouts, "HE ANSWERED THE QUESTION."

"No I didn't."

"The answer was Australia, and you mentioned their airline."

"I was just reading whatever was on the plane outside."

"Hobi Hyung, why are you arguing, don't you want food. Or are you trying to starve us to death."

The production team say the words we hear nearly every episode, "we will discuss." That was their way of saying 'you should loose, but you were close to winning. We feel bad and are going to give you the prize.'

Sure enough, they placed 2 four packs of meat pies in Namjoons hands.

"I'll go next." Jimin walks to the camera, picking out the piece of paper which read 'Paper, Scissors, Rock."

This time, the camera man versus him.

Round 1: Jimin-rock, Camera Man- paper

Round 2: Jimin-paper, Camera Man- Scissors.

"YOU SUCK HYUNG"

"Don't make me swear on camera!"

Round 3: Jimin-rock, Camera Man- paper

Y/N giggled, they weren't going to be getting- wait what was Jimin Hyung playing for.

"What food aren't we getting."

"Ahh, we should have told you. That was for Caromello Koala's."

"I'm sorry what."

"Koa- Aren't they animals."

"Why are they dipped in Caramel?"

"They looked so cuddly. Who would want to eat them."

Jungkook just stared at the crew with a blank expression on his face, trying to comprehend people eating those sweet creatures.

"They're chocolates" said a member of the crew, trying to hold back his laughter at the group thinking that the Australians would do such a thing. Then again, they'd be shocked to find out what the next person would be playing for.

"Who's next" Suga asked, in his usual monotone voice. He was the only one who had kept his composure through the whole Koala ordeal. Jin still looked concerned at the false though of Australian's eating caramel with Koala's whilst V was still using hand actions to describe how fluffy they were.

 "I'll go" Y/N exclaims, standing up to pick the blue sheet of paper. She opens it facing the camera. 'Guess the Song.' She hadn't played this game before, but she understood the gist.

"Pretty self explanatory, Y/n we will play you 2 seconds of a song. If you correctly guess it you get the food."

"And what found would that be" she asks whilst batting her eyelashes.

"It's a surprise."

"As long as it's not strawberry filled Kangaroo I'll be happy" Jin exclaims from the background. The staff chuckle amongst themselves.

Y/N furrows her eyebrows as she waits for one of their songs to play from the iPhone of one of the producers. She remembers decorating that iPhone case when they were in Hawaii filming season 2, and was happy to see that her case was still there. She has found a bunch of flower stickers, and stuck it around the plain aqua case, topping it off with an official BTS sticker. Truthfully, it looked as if a 4 year old had done it, but she was so happy that the staff member still had it. It really showed how they had all become a family.

A beat suddenly plays for 3 seconds, and as quickly as she heard it, it disappeared. It was familiar, but not familiar enough. She could barely even remember the words for the next line. So much for planning to sing the song till she got to the chorus.

"Can I listen to it again please," she asks, giving her signature pout.

Of course, they would let her listen again- and they did.

Yet once again, she couldn't make out the song. It wasn't a single. They hadn't performed it recently, she didn't even know if they had ever performed it.

"saramdeureun naege malhae geu jeongdoye gobineun jinaganeun sonagirago (사람들은 내게 말해 그 정도의 고비는 지나가는 소나기라고)."

She really had no clue. Y/N turned around, hoping her boys would give her a helping hand, but they looked as dumbfounded as her. Useless.

She analyzed the lyrics. They were dark. Something Suga would write? Agust D would perform? Was it a diss track? Had they wrote another one without her. She was meant to be on 'Cypher V.' They had promised her she could. And it wasn't an empty promise like they gave V Hyung.

She turned back to face the camera, before quickly apologizing to her boys.

"Uhhhh." Sigh. "Is it… To be honest I can't even remember the next few lines. Um…. To be honest, it didn't even sound like us. Like, I'm assuming Suga Hyung rapped it because it's fast, but it doesn't sound like him. It can't be him. And it's not the other two, meaning I'm the only member of the rap line left. And it sounds like a guy. UNLESS you played with the pitch so it wouldn’t be obvious. If that’s so we have to give you all more credit.

The boys chuckle behind her. Y/N always started to ramble when she was nervous, or in this case overthinking.

"JUST SAY SOMETHING" Jungkook yelled, tired of waiting for the maknae.

"Uhhh. Did we even sing this?"

The staff smile. "No you didn't. Stray Kids did."

 Before Y/N had time to beat herself up for not knowing the lyrics to one of her favorite groups (who would roast her for not knowing their song when the video dropped), J-Hope leaps off the sofa, knocking over Namjoon in the process. "RIGGED! HOW WAS SHE SUPPOSED TO GUESS THAT. HOW CAN WE GET FOOD. DO YOU WANT US TO SUFFER. DO YOU WANT US TO DIE HERE. BEFORE THE INSECTS KILL US."

 Y/N fell to the ground laughing at her hyungs over reaction.

The staff quickly try to defend their actions. "No no. We thought it'd be funny. You all should know what so-"

"Don't give me any excuses. I, dance leader, believe this is bullying. I want the food." He looks around, signaling for the rest of the members to help him. "We want the food. Please."

"Of course. Of course. We aren't that mean. You're still going to get kangaroo. It's currently thawing in your hotel."

 "I'm sorry what?"

"Kangaroo?"

"STRAWBERRY FILLED KANGAROO. I GUESSED IT!"

"Shut up Jin Hyung."

"You better be joking."

"Who eats Kangaroo."

"Don't they box people."

Yoongi was the only one who wasn't loosing his shit. As expected. Instead he was typing away on his phone, before responding to the rest of the group. "Apparently, people eat Kangaroos here. It's quite common."

"Only in Australia would they eat Kangaroo instead of Chicken."

 Soon the game was over, after all the members had their turn.

V had to eat a tablespoon of vegemite, and when he successfully did it on his fourth try, he was awarded with- you guessed it- more Vegemite.

Jungkook had to name three phrases in Australian slang. Luckily him reading the tourist guide on the plane had come handy. "G'Day Mate" "Shrimp on the barbie" and "servo" were said in a really bad strong broad Aussie accent. And due to his efforts, he was awarded with Lamingtons.

Suga had to successfully promote their new single, and make 2 people purchase the album. He refused to do so, meaning that the group missed the opportunity of getting some Australian chips.

Jin had to give a rendition of the Australian anthem, after listening to it for 5 minutes. He stood up proudly on the table, after asking permission from the airport staff, and belted it out- very incorrectly. But his gallant effort allowed him to get some sausage rolls.

Last up was J-Hope, who was already rolling his sleeves up in anticipation. He was presented with an oval shaped ball. If he kicked it, somewhat straight, they would give him salad. Nothing distinctly Australian about it, but they would need some veggies too\ wash down the sugary and meaty food.

He positioned himself. Not knowing how to hold it. Some Australian passerbyers laughed at his positioning. Therefore he changed the position, so it was perpendicular to his body. RM stood infront of him, attempting to catch it- that is, if it went to him.

Hobi kicked it. Straight into Namjoons face. Nevertheless they were eating veggies tonight.

The squad screamed in happiness, whilst Namjoon rolled over the floor in pain. They had won the majority of their food, were going to eat kangaroo and have a massive sugar rush. They were going to be fed well tonight.

"Time to eat! Let's go to the hotel" Jimin exclaimed, speaking to cover the sound of his stomach rumbling.

"How do you think you're getting there?" the staff asked, causing the 8 very tired members of one of the biggest groups in the world to sigh very loudly and roll their eyes.

 By the time they would get to their hotel, it would be closer to breakfast than dinner.

[wondroussimmer-blog]

GET TO KNOW ME-

Basically, no one actually tagged me in this, but I thought i’d give it a go anyway seeing as this is a new blog and you guys can get to now me a bit, so I tag anyone who sees this and also wants to have a go...

________________________________________________________________

1. What is your full name? I’m not putting my last name on here, but my first name is Maja (Miya) 2. What is your nickname? I don’t really have one 3. Birthday? January 1st 4. What is your favourite book series? I don’t really read book series’ 5. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? Not 100% sure, I don’t believe in the sort of ghosts you see in films, but I think I believe our loved ones stay with us in some way. As for aliens, idk, we can’t be the only life but idk.  6. Who is your favourite author? I find the fault in our stars quite overrated, but i’d say John Green because some of his others are my favourites! 7. What is your favourite radio station? BBC Radio 1 8. What is your favourite flavour of anything? this is such a weird question, how can you have a favourite flavour for everything? but if it’s sweet, definitely strawberry! 9. What word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful? Again, weird question, but i use so many words for this, my most used are probably lovely and amazing 10. What is your current favourite song? this changes alll the time, but right this minute it’s probably sunflower by post malone and swae lee 11. What is your favourite word? is this a thing? 12. What was the last song you listened to? vacation by hippo campus 13. What TV show would you recommend for everybody to watch? big mouth, orphan black, queer eye, dexter 14. What is your favourite movie to watch when you’re feeling down? the breakfast club or mean girls probably 15. Do you play video games? only the sims 16. What is your biggest fear? probably the death of people close to me, and in the future not being able to have children 17. What is your best quality, in your opinion? probably that i’m a friendly person  18. What is your worst quality, in your opinion? i’m v insecure 19. Do you like cats or dogs better? DOGS... always dogs! 20. What is your favourite season? autumn/winter 21. Are you in a relationship? yes 22. What is something you miss from your childhood? having way more friends and barely any responsibilities 23. Who is your best friend? my boyfriend 24. What is your eye colour? blue 25. What is your hair colour? brown 26. Who is someone you love? my boyfriend and family 27. Who is someone you trust? my boyfriend and closest family 28. Who is someone you think about often? okay wow, so much variety in these answers but the same as the previous two answers 29. Are you currently excited about/for something? christmas and my birthday 30. What is your biggest obsession? probably sims 31. What was your favourite TV show as a child? Probably Tracy beaker or that’s so raven  32. Who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone? my boyfriend 33. Are you superstitious? only slightly 34. Do you have any unusual phobias? cracking knuckles, moths (but only indoors), realistic looking mannequins and gas masks... so not much 35. Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? behind, every single time 36. What is your favourite hobby? playing sims, graphic designing, video editing 37. What was the last book you read? The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat by Oliver Sacks 38. What was the last movie you watched? Muppet’s Christmas Carol 39. What musical instruments do you play, if any? I play a bit of guitar and can play the mr bean theme song on piano if that counts 40. What is your favourite animal? dogs 41. What are your top 5 favourite Tumblr blogs that you follow? I definitely have more than 5  42. What superpower do you wish you had? be able to teleport and go invisible  43. When and where do you feel most at peace? probably at home with my boyfriend 44. What makes you smile? sorry if this is becoming a boring answer... but my boyfriend! also my dog :) 45. What sports do you play, if any? I don’t at the moment, but I have done tennis, dance (ballet, tap and modern), swimming, karate, speed skating and netball 46. What is your favourite drink? water... how boring ik 47. When was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody? Last month, I made my boyfriend a scrap book as one of my boyfriend’s presents for our anniversary and wrote some letters as part of it  48. Are you afraid of heights? not if it’s a secure height 49. What is your biggest pet peeve? I have wayyy too many and so many grammatical ones, I absolutely hate when people incorrectly use was and were, so if someone said ‘we was going’, I think it’s quite an essex thing but I hateeee it, I can’t stand bad grammar, but also slow walkers, people who walk through the door without looking behind them to hold the door open for people behind, other drivers not indicating, people that have to be louder than everyone else, people that chew with their mouths open... basically I have a lot and this list could go on and on and on 50. Have you ever been to a concert? I’ve seen all time low, the 1975, imagine dragons, sunset sons, ed sheeran and paramore in concert so far and i’m seeing panic! at the disco in march which i’m MEGA excited about!!! 51. Are you vegan/vegetarian? vegetarian 52. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? This would change all the time, it went from radio dj, to dancer, to teacher when I was really young, then architect when I was a teenager, and now it’s clinical psychologist which i’m slowly working towards 53. What fictional world would you like to live in? I’ve not got a clue 54. What is something you worry about? EVERYTHING! I get a lot of social anxiety, so basically whenever i’m out of the house i’m worrying about absolutely everything and it’s the worst and gets me super down, so yeah, love that 55. Are you scared of the dark? okay so I don’t like leaving the dark, i’m fine being in the dark but I hate when i’m home alone and have to turn the lights off in the living room, kitchen and hall to go to bed... if that makes sense 56. Do you like to sing? i’m someone that, at home, is constantly singing, and when it’s only my boyfriend around, if one of us says a sentence that can in some way relate to a song, i’ll immediately sing it, but I suck so I won’t ever sing in public 57. Have you ever skipped school? in school I faked being ill a few times to get off of school, but in uni i’ve skipped way too many lectures over the past 3 years 58. What is your favourite place on the planet? I absolutely adore Spain, but also Belgrade (i’m half Serbian) 59. Where would you like to live? If not my current home town, i’d love to one day live somewhere like Norway or Sweden 60. Do you have any pets? yep, i’ve got a french bulldog 61. Are you more of an early bird or a night owl? I wake up pretty early, but I hate to start the day early 62. Do you like sunrises or sunsets better? sunsets. 63. Do you know how to drive? Yep 64. Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? the sound of headphones but I normally use earbuds 65. Have you ever had braces? nope, thank god 66. What is your favourite genre of music? this really ranges from charts, to indie rock, to ‘former emo kid’, to early 2000s r&b, to musical theatre 67. Who is your hero? probably my boyfriend 68. Do you read comic books? no 69. What makes you the most angry? as we’ve already gathered, I have a lot of pet peeves, so a lot! 70. Do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book?a real book! 71. What is your favourite subject in school? I currently study psychology which has been my favourite subject since A levels, but during GCSEs I enjoyed maths  72. Do you have any siblings? 1 younger brother 73. What was the last thing you bought? some christmas presents for my boyfriend’s cousins 74. How tall are you? 5ft4 75. Can you cook? yes 76. What are three things that you love? spending time with people I love, travelling, collecting photos  77. What are three things that you hate? busy places, cheats, confrontation 78. Do you have more female friends or more male friends? I actually barely have any so this is kind of hard to answer 79. What is your sexual orientation? straight 80. Where do you currently live? England 81. Who was the last person you texted? my mum 82. When was the last time you cried? I’m not actually sure, which is funny because I cry all the time and super easily 83. Who is your favourite YouTuber? I have so many: in terms of sims: lilsimsie, urbansims, sophsims, simkim, plumbella, in terms of lifestyle: louise pentland, in terms of fashion and beauty: samantha maria, tati westbrook, busybee carys, patricia bright, antonio garza, and others: shane dawson, sarah baska, kendall rae, jaackmaate, and loads more! basically, if i’m not on tumblr, i’m on youtube, if i’m not on youtube i’m playing sims, and if i’m not on sims i’m on tumblr... 84. Do you like to take selfies? rarely 85. What is your favourite app? any social media  86. What is your relationship with your parent(s) like? fab 87. What is your favourite foreign accent? Australian and Scottish 88. What is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit? I have so many but I won’t bore you with another long list, so just a few: Sweden, South Africa, Iceland and Canada 89. What is your favourite number? 1 90. Can you juggle? no 91. Are you religious? I was baptised but don’t really consider myself religious 92. Do you find outer space or the deep ocean to be more interesting? both as interesting as the other 93. Do you consider yourself to be a daredevil? not really 94. Are you allergic to anything? no 95. Can you curl your tongue? yep, one of my weird ‘party tricks’ is I can actually curl it 180 degrees 96. Can you wiggle your ears? no 97. How often do you admit that you were wrong about something? not as often as I should 98. Do you prefer the forest or the beach? probably the forest 99. What is your favourite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you?my dad probably gives the best life advice but there’s too much to put here   100. Are you a good liar? It depends 101. What is your Hogwarts House? Hufflepuff 102. Do you talk to yourself? All the time 103. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? I N T R O V E R T, i’m so introverted to the point I hate it but seriously struggle to change it 104. Do you keep a journal/diary? no but I have in the past 105. Do you believe in second chances? it depends 106. If you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do? Hand it in 107. Do you believe that people are capable of change? It depends 108. Are you ticklish? VERY 109. Have you ever been on a plane? manyyyy times 110. Do you have any piercings? nope, I have but not anymore 111. What fictional character do you wish was real? no idea  112. Do you have any tattoos? nope 113. What is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far? I’m really not sure 114. Do you believe in karma? to an extent, but at the same time bad things seem to happen to good people, sooooo 115. Do you wear glasses or contacts? neither 116. Do you want children? yes 117. Who is the smartest person you know? my cousin 118. What is your most embarrassing memory? omg my whole life is filled with embarrassing memories that I seem to always remember at the most inconvenient times or when i’m about to go to sleep that just haunt me out of nowhere...fun 119. Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? yes 120. What colour are most of you clothes? black or white 121. Do you like adventures? yep 122. Have you ever been on TV? no 123. How old are you? 20 - nearly 21 124. What is your favourite quote? not really sure. 125. Do you prefer sweet or savoury foods? sweet

[anicegaykid]

who dis?

#firstpost seems more daunting than it needs to be. Got myself all creative blocked up so here is a little diddy to get to know me better.. 

Are you named after anyone?

I am actually named after Jessica Wakefield from Sweet Valley High

When was the last time you cried?

tbh, I tend to flip from emotionless to SUPER emotional like 0-60. Sometimes no response, sometimes (like this afternoon) I see a beautiful pond surrounded in nature, being natural and beautiful, water sparkling in the sunshine and the tears just roll.

Do you have kids? If no, how many do you want?

No kids atm, but a couple kiddos would be nice in the near future

If you were another person, would you be a friend of yourself?

..like.. what.. ? am I just like a duplicate of me? Like am I the same person I am now and would I be friends with someone JUST like me? Or am I someone else? Who am I? Like, I enjoy spending time on my own? 

Bottom line, I like me. 

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

100%

What’s the first thing you notice about people?

eyes, smile, lips, face bone structure

What is your eye color?

blue, sometimes they get a little grey

Scary movie or happy endings?

BOTH. 

Favorite smells?

Citrus, patchouli, cut grass, peaches and strawberries

Do you have any special talents?

Talents include: fantastic with horses, very good dog mom, I can cook frozen pizzas to perfection -- if I don’t get distracted, designing queer tees, i can roll a pretty decent j, solid problem solver, got some wit and can be funny. 

Where were you born?

Charlottetown, Prince Edward Island, Canada

What’s your zodiac sign? Do you believe in it?

Leo; I mean it IS surprisingly accurate like all the time. 

What are your hobbies?

I am kind of in between hobbies right now.. I dabble in some things. I go to the gym like more than average, but I would like to go more - said everyone ever. I’d like to hike more, camp more, build more things out of pallets, you know.. the usual

Do you have any siblings?

I have a 21 year old brother and a 14 year old sister.

What do you want to be when you grow up?

Life is pretty great tbh, I’d like to continue being happy with my little fam

Who was your first best friend?

My first best friend would have to be my cousin, Brittany. Like a sister.

How tall are you?

5′6″

What is the least favourite thing about yourself?

I wish I was a lot better at expressing how I feel. 

Things that still bother me - my wife and I had a discussion about proposals and who would ask who. We landed on me asking her, which I did and am SO happy about, but the reason behind it being that I am so poor at expressing emotions that she was afraid it would affect her confidence in my response. 

For a first TMI moment of the blog, I have so much anxiety in my ability to express myself that I can’t even manage to make any “noise” during sex. Doesn’t even matter that I am my most comfortable self with her, STILL struggle. A work in progress for me I guess. 

Funniest moment throughout School?

There was a time when we were at a beach party when I was 17, the RCMP showed up to break it up and snag any and all intoxicated minors they could. The tide had recently come in, but where we were was a little dip in the side of the cliff so the path back to the road was water-covered. So someone peeks around the cliff to see the two Mounties wading through the water. This party crew are country-folk and are 100% ready for this situation with a wooden ladder that leads up the side of the cliff into a field close to where all the vehicles are parked. As party-goers are running through the field to cars, someone shouts, “PIT PARTY” and everyone heads towards the local Pit. Along the way someone with a truck steals a round bale from a field and uses it to create the BIGGEST bonfire I’ve ever seen. 

How many countries have you visited?

like ~10

What was your favourite/worst subject in High School?

I struggled with math but funny enough my career path has led me to a life in the casino so I do math daily and enjoy it very much!

My favourite courses in High School were Conservation and Agricultural Science. 

What is your Favourite drink? Animal? Perfume?

Coke Zero Cherry

Horse

Karma by Lush

What would you (or have you) name your children?

I really like Posy, Daisy, Freddie and Loren

What Sports do you play/Have you played?

I used to Figure Skate, Horseback Ride, Ringette

Who are some of your favourite YouTubers?

I’ve always been a Grace Helbig, Mamrie Hart, Hannah Hart fan

I like Phil DeFranco for news, Pewds for some lulz, love me some Tyler Oakley, Whitney Simmons and Chloe Ting to work the booty, Vox for learning, FunForLouis has some BEAUTIFUL imagery and plays to the traveler side of me and I recently discovered Will Smith’s channel and cannot get enough!

How many Girlfriends/Boyfriends have you had?

I have had an unsettling amount of bfs for a lesbian, but 2 of them really stand out as being genuinely decent guys and I would still hang out with, platonically, to this day.

I have had a grand total of 4 gfs, I married the fourth bc I got LUCKY AS HECK!

Favourite memory from childhood?

The day I got my first puppy.

One time I was gifted a horse for Christmas bc my Dad felt so bad that I had to have my first pony put down earlier that year. 

I also was old enough to remember both my siblings being born!

How would you describe your fashion sense?

tom boy hyper femme 

What phone do you have? (iOS v Android?)

iPhone6s

Tell us one of your bad habits!

I bite my nails and chew my cuticles

3 things that upset you?

inequality

excessive force

did I say inequality?

3 things that make you happy?

Olivia

My animals

family

How is your relationship with parents?

My Mom is one of my best friends in this world! My Dad is an odd case, he struggles with my sexuality, I understand that it is because of where and when he grew up, he is never outwardly rude or mean to me, he’s a quiet country guy, he was at our wedding, he gave me away with my Mom, he’s kind to Olivia, he’s kind to me, he doesn’t understand but recognizes that it is real. I love my Dad, I really do. I’m proud of my Mom for educating him and ensuring that he is present and polite. I get frustrated from time to time and I have cried a lot of tears about it. Our relationship can be strange but at the same time hasn’t changed. He’s been a great Dad and he’ll be a fantastic Grampy. I have to check myself because there are people who are much worse off than me. I get jealous of Olivia sometimes because her Dad is so sweet to her and treats me like a daughter so easily, but my Dad has never been the soft spoken lovey type. We’ve hugged twice in my life. One of them was when I was leaving for England with a one way ticket and no foreseeable return plans and one was when he was jokingly blocking my path and I used it as a disarming mechanism to scoot through. 

What’s on your mind?

All I can think about today is the fact that I became an aunt at 5AM this morning and I’m going to see his later this afternoon. I SO excited!

What’s your talent?

troubleshooting queen.

naturally creative to my own surprise.

One word that describes you?

patient

What’s your favourite quotes?

No Pride for some of us without liberation for all of us . Marsha P Johnson

We way too fly to partake in all this hate, we out here vibin’ . Ariana Grande

Any pets?

4 dogs:

Finnley - Great PyreneesXAustralian Shepard

Effie - Border CollieX

Shiro - DacshundXMiniature Australian Shepard

Moose - Great PyreneesXFinnley

2 Cats:

Priya - long haired tabby, kinda sorta Ragdoll’esque

Punkin - short haired orange tabby with a poofy tail

2 Beta Fishies:

King Push & Todd

What is the farthest you’ve been from home?

I lived in England for 2 years & travelled Europe for a month

Are you an extrovert or introvert?

I think TECHNICALLY an introvert?  I can be v extroverted but I really need time to recharge. Recharging for me is being home with my comforts. My wifey, doggos, snacks and Netflix.

Are you left or right handed?

Right hander

Do you consider yourself a good cook?

Like.. sort of? I don’t cook much but when I do I always surprise myself with how well I do lol

Does your name have a special meaning?

It means my Mother was 18 when she had me and REALLY liked Sweet Valley High

If money were no object what would you get for your next birthday?

2 weeks away from home/work, road trip to Halifax for the fertility clinic, get started on a baby and then fly off to one of those tropical cabins on the water. 

If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?

I would love to have a few homes! A winter getaway BC. A condo in Halifax, NS and a cute little hobby farm here in PEI in some rolling hills somewhere in between Kensington and Charlottetown. 

What’s your favourite thing to have for breakfast?

I love chocolate chip waffles/pancakes, French style pastry breakfast, and when I’m feeling fab, some eggs benny on smoked salmon with a couple mimosas on the side. 

What’s your favourite gadget?

I just got a Fitbit so thats been pretty exciting, aside from that, my phone is on me at like all times. 

What’s your longest relationship so far?

My current one. We’re about to hit 4 years together, married for a little over a month. 

[fedine]

Answer all of them

Under a cut! This is a long one!!

1: Do they drink coffee?

I don’t think so; though I do think he enjoys the occasional Starbucks drink.

2: Are they left or right handed?

Right handed!

3: How do they do their hair? Facial hair? (If they have it)

His hair is super long! I’ve seen some pictures of him where he has it tied back, but not too many more recently. It looks messy but it is really really cute! I want to brush it or just run my fingers through it a lot. He also does grow some of his facial hair out! I like it a lot.

4: What’s their favorite animal?

Well, going off his fursona, I’m going to go with a wolf.

5: What is their relationship status?

Taken by me!

6: What is their favorite band/singer?

A weird thing about our relationship is that we don’t really talk about or share music too much, but we know we have similar music tastes! I also know he likes Death Grips.

7: Are they more a cat or dog person?

Dog person!

8: What does their laugh sound like?

Ohh, gosh! I love his laugh so much! He also has several of them, ranging from: “This is a horrible picture and I’m showing it to you now,” “This is a horrible picture and I’m NOT going to show it to you,” and my personal favorite is his really really loud laugh he does when some meme he sees gets really weird/bad or we keep adding onto it ourselves.

9: Do they know multiple languages? Which ones?

He used to take French, so he knows a little bit, but he isn’t fluent. 

10: How old are they? How old are you?

He is just a year younger than me. 13 months, to be exact!

11: One word that describes them.

I can’t possibly choose one word, but honestly my favorite one to describe him as is “warm” because I see it in his eyes in pictures he sends and when we video chat. He makes me feel like I’m at home with him, even if we’re so far apart.

12: Do they have any pets?

A German shepherd mix named Winston! I hear him a lot in the background of our calls.

13: What is their favorite TV show?

He really liked Bojack Horseman! He binged it around the time we got together. We also like watching shows together that we never finish… Though, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood was one we did finish, and we both loved it! He also really likes Dragonball Z, and Bleach!

14: What is their favorite movie?

Oh, that’s a hard one because he REALLY likes movies and film theory and stuff, but I’m pretty sure it’s a Marvel movie. He also told me one time that he likes Studio Ghibli movies a lot, but he talks about Marvel movies a lot more.

15: What car do they drive?

He does not drive.

16: What ethnicity and/or nationality are they? 

He’s Australian! 

17: Where did you meet them?

I met him online, after he joined my guild in World of Warcraft. I had been a member for a year already, and I believe I had just gotten back from an extended break from Horde side. He was very new to the game, and also very shy at first, but he joined up with us because he wanted to try role play, as well as raiding. He was at a large, server-wide event that I went to as well, but it took him a while to get into the Discord voice chat. He’s very shy! Once he got in though, we hit it off really well! Soon we had begun to spend nearly every waking moment together. Also, we haven’t stopped doing that. It’s been about a year since we started that. 

18: What was your first meeting like?

Would you believe me if I said it was almost an argument? I’d been healing a long time, and he loved to tank, so we each thought our own roles were the most important in a raid/dungeon environment. “A tank keeps the mobs off the healer, so they aren’t overwhelmed;” “A tank won’t last long without a healer.” Well, now we know that both of the roles are much weaker on their own, and they are only really at their peak when they have the other with them. Still, that has not stopped him from saving the raid in huge manners as he’s the last tank alive and the boss is at 1% HP. Of course, I’ve saved the raid too, just in much more subtle manners!

19:  What is their zodiac sign? Are your signs compatible?

I’m a Virgo and he’s a Libra. So, yes, I do believe that they are!

20: What month is their birthday?

October! That was already my favorite month of the year before I even met him!

21: What is your favorite outfit on them?

Whatever he’s most comfortable in! 

22: Are they good texters?

He’s very good! He’s a quick typer, and messages me “Good morning!” if I don’t get to it first every day! He types with the correct capitalization, too, which I find very cute for some reason, but that may be just because it’s him.

23: Your favorite feature about their appearance.

Oh, hmmm… I love the way he looks, and it’s hard to choose just one thing. His eyes, maybe? I did already go over that, as well as his hair… You know what, I’m going to keep talking about his eyes. They’re two beautiful shades of blue, and every time he sends me a picture of him I can see how much he loves me in them, and sometimes I have to make an effort to not be overwhelmed by it. In a good way!

24: Your favorite thing about their personality.

He’s a big sweetheart, and a huge goofball! He knows how to make me laugh and feel better whenever I’m not in a good mood.

25: Do they make you laugh?

Every single day! 

26: Do you make them laugh?

Yes, I do! We have very similar senses of humor. Sometimes it’s awful. I love it all the time, though!

27: Are they good huggers/ kissers?

Even though we’re long distance, yes. He is, and I know he is. 

28: What is your favorite “flaw” that they have?

He’s a degenerate. It’s really funny though. I love how chaotic he is.

29: Are they nice to strangers?

He is VERY shy, but yes, he is! He’s extremely sweet and kind.

30: What is the funniest thing they have ever said?

Honestly, he’s just the funniest person ever and makes me crack up every single day. Sometimes he just randomly says whatever comes to his mind. Today I really liked his joke about that redesign for the new Incredibles movie. Something about weed. We’ve been making a lot of weed jokes today.

31: Saddest?

Also from today: he didn’t know what a buffalo was. He thought they were different from bison. I was eating buffalo jerky from 5 years ago and he thought it was a brand of jerky. He also thought they were extinct.

32: Weirdest?

Literally any vore joke he has ever made. 

33: Cutest?

Gosh, just trying to pick one thing is so difficult... But when he tells me he loves me and how he can’t wait to see me? When he tells me about dreams he has with me in them? It makes my heart melt.

34: Ever dreamt about them? What happened in the dream?

Recently I posted about a dream I had about him and I just kissing each other. Nothing super exciting sounding, but gosh, I want to experience it so bad.

35: How tall are they? How tall are you?

I am... 5′4″... He is... 6′5″... 

36: Do they have a booty?

I do not know. He has only sent me selfies of just his face or completely front facing. I can only assume. Doesn’t matter though! 

37: What are their hobbies?

Video games. He really likes World of Warcraft (of course!), Fallout: New Vegas, Grand Theft Auto V, Elder Scrolls Online, Overwatch, Quake Champions, and Pokemon!

38: What are their talents?

He’s has amazing reflexes, honestly. He uses them for gaming, and because of it, he’s amazingly good at just about any game he plays. 

39: What would your dream date be with them?

A physical one, where we are next to each other.

40: Does anyone know about your crush/love?

I make it a point to make sure everyone knows.

41: What do you guys have in common?

Pretty much everything, really. From sense of humor, taste in music, and favorite video games for the most part. We also share the same sexual orientation, and we have yet to disagree on politics.

42: Do they go to the gym?

No, but he exercises just about every day! If he doesn’t do a whole bunch of jumping jacks his legs start to get sore.

43: Do they go by their given name?

Yes and no. Since we’re in a World of Warcraft guild, we both go by screen names, so no one there calls him his real name but me. Same thing with just about everything online, though. Other than that though, he does.

44: What is their favorite color?

He really loves orange! Orange and white is one of his favorite color schemes. It makes me think of orange creamsicles!

45: How far apart do you live from them?

About 572 miles-- roughly an eight and a half hour drive. 

46: What song reminds you of them?

Boats and Birds by Gregory and the Hawk

47: Do they listen to a lot of music?

I think so, but I think he listens to more random YouTube videos than anything.

48: What do they smell like?

He gave me his jacket for Valentine’s Day, and when I first got it I just held it up to my face and smelled it for a good while because it was the first time I got to experience what he smelled like. I can’t really describe his scent, because I’m not good with words in that way, but I just know that it’s my favorite scent in the whole world.

49: If they were in a book (protagonist or antagonist or supporting character, up to you) how would the writer describe them?

If it were up to me, I would describe him as accurately as possible. Still, I only really know his personality the best, so that’s what I would describe the most. I think he would be a protagonist, as well. He’s my protagonist, anyway.

50: How often do you see them?

We talk every day-- I’m talking to him right now! But as for actually seeing him, I look at every picture he has sent me of himself every night. There’s about... 22 of them that I have, including a video, but there’s one I missed of him in Australia in a “had to do it to em” pose. I’m still sad I lost that one. 

51: The last text/ message they sent you?

It was a Sorlag skin from Quake Champions. As for a text message from Discord, it was a “Call me!”

52: The last thing they said to you in person?

:(

53: What is the most embarrassing thing that’s happened to you in front of them?

I once said “Heal, boy!” to him while we were leveling in WoW together because his health was low and he wasn’t paying attention, but it came off as “Heel, boy!” like he was a dog... The more embarrassing bit though about it was that one or two of our friends were there as well.

54: Do they have any tattoos or piercings?

To my knowledge, no, but I seriously doubt it.

55: What color are their eyes?

Blue gray! 

56: What is their clothing style?

Comfortable: jeans and graphic T-shirts! That I plan to steal...

57: What is one thing that makes them really special?

Literally everything about him. He’s the most special person to me, and I love him for every single thing. 

58: Will you tell your crush your feelings?

Alright, gonna be honest, I'm a bi wlw, and I was content to never say a damn thing about any feeling I ever felt, so I’m thankful every day that he did, because I was very ready to take my feelings to the grave and pine after him forever.

59: How long did you know them before you started falling for them?

Probably like a day or something. It didn’t take long to start liking him-- even when we were alone in the server voice chats that day I felt comfortable around him.

60: Was there a defining moment when you knew you liked them?

Sort of! I don’t remember the exact details, but I do remember messaging one of my best friends about it immediately. I was pretty vague about it to her. Something like: “Yeah, I think I’m in love with someone in the voice chat...” And she knew immediately who. I guess I was obvious, though.

[thebigmick284]

Thoughts on OUAT ending.

Big messy post and quick thoughts ahead!

It’s long past time (5 years IMO) that it should have ended. I have never seen a show nose-dive in quality so much... yet I kept watching and will till the end. Maybe Adam and Eddy’s message of ‘hope’ got to me, haha...

I still remember watching the Australian premiere of the pilot back in early 2012. Curious but unsure. I was only a casual watcher in S1, it didn’t fully grab me. I don’t really have too many memories of S1 apart from being invested in the Rumple/Bae storyline. These two really sold the papa/son relationship. Nowadays I do think it’s overall the best season although the fandom overrates it to the extreme at times.

Come the announcement of Captain Hook in that S2 comic con promo and I became more intrigued as the story of Peter Pan has been with me for as long as I can remember. I slowly became more hooked (ha) during 2A and remember not actually being too impressed with Hook at first. I wanted Captain James Hook, what was this Killain Jones BS? This is was where I first started looking around at the Tumblr fandom and it was still a shit storm back then so I kept to myself.

I remember being excited we would finally see adult Bae.... and then disappointment as he went underutilised. I actually remember being happy Neal and Emma admitted their love because I thought the SQers would realize that SQ isn’t the story they are telling and stop their bullying. I was really enjoying myself with the show, it was really great escapism. It made me believe that there could be parallel fairy tale worlds out there, haha. Especially as I was going through a lot of personal things. Again, I tried to stay out of the fandom drama but was disappointed people I found only really wanted to talk about shipping.

 But my fanboying reached overdrive when this promo came out.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ihi_5gXAMOU

Holy crap that shadow! Wendy Darling! Neverland! I actually dared and interacted with the fandom after that. In combination with that fantastic goosebump inducing ending of S2 here, ‘Peter Pan Never Fails’-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uRbG42dmGCw

I was ecstatic. I started liking O’Donoghue’s Hook too at this point. He had all the elements of Barrie’s Hook with OUAT’s own twist and when I rewatched his scenes, I found I enjoyed him so much more.

My excitement for S3 was probably the most invested I was in the show. I even started a blog where I posted reviews and stuff- Storybrooke Clock Tower and I think I had 1000 followers. I even sent and received a message from Parker Croft who played Felix. I could NOT wait for S3 to start.

Season 3 was just pure joy for me. They delivered by large and beyond what I had hoped for with their promise of a darker Neverland arc. Robbie Kay, again, someone I was worried about, blew me away. I just remember my thoughts after that final scene of 3x01 and then that ELECTRIFYING sneak peak of 3x02 with Pan sizing up Emma. Holy shit! This kid was sooooo good as Peter Pan, his intensity, that child like charm, having a British accent, his cocky confidence. I was in Pan heaven!

I even love 3B and it reminded me of how much I used to love the 30′s Wizard of Oz movie. I still maintain this was a great arc, it had the best visuals of the series- look at the Oz sets, how good the flying monkeys looked, all the characters still felt like themselves and had things to do, the missing year instead of tired flashbacks and the CS movie at the end.  Lots of fantastic material 

Oh and how could I forget OUATIW which also aired at this time. Starting off a little shaky (I remember the fan complaints) it just went from strength to strength and was a hugely enjoyable spin-off. Again, It reminded me of how much I loved Jafar as a kid and all that Aladdin mythology.

S3 was just a fantastic time to be a Oncer. But after the CS movie I had a funny feeling. It felt like it should have ended right there. With that final montage, with Rumple and Belle’s vows echoing the character arcs of the whole cast...It really felt concluded.

Still I watched on, nervous with the Frozen arc because it felt more like a financial decision rather then creative. I remember coming home after the CS movie aired and wanting to spoil myself so I checked FB and saw ‘Frozen is coming to OUAT’ and I was like... really? really?

Around 4A I shut down my old OUAT blog and just used my Bigmick284 one. I started not being afraid of interacting with fandom and used to reblog a lot of confession posts. I was really active on the FB OUAT page too. I fought with a lot of BAs, lol, and was bullied off the site even...

 People I remember getting along with include.

@mrs-emma-swan-jones-  I mention this a lot but...Anyway... You had a different username but I remember chatting with you a lot during early 4A. I still remember watching and smiling to your fangirling CS reaction videos on Youtube and smiling at all your excitement. Holy crap was that was really 4 years ago...

@lessawildmoon- in my quest to find people who loved to discuss CS intelligently and without resulting to bullying I found you. I remember thinking, I wish she would follow me, lol. And then you did! I always love your level headed posts. And for defending me more than once (ha).

@i-will-move-on-in-life- I remember you because you were always positive and someway down the line we found we liked a lot of things and had a lot in common other than OUAT and here we are still chatting and potentially even planning things! 

@seethem-dancing​- I just remember loving your deep and intricate essays which I always enjoyed reading.

To others who I don’t think are here any more such as FIO who I interacted with a lot over the bullying and hypocritical to downright disgusting ways of the fandom.

I’ve probably forgotten people so I am sorry if IhHave.

Fighting BAs and dealing with FB invasions, I felt stronger because I had friends here. Even with things drove me mad and I got personally attacked... I also learnt and researched many important issues such as rape culture. I learnt a lot and changed a lot about my own beliefs.

Even though I think S1-S3 and OUATIW was best, 4A was probably the last time I think OUAT was really enjoyable and I still couldn’t wait to get home and watch. They did a great job with the Frozen cast, I loved all the Emma focus and it was fun. Something sorely missing with 4B onwards which became a chore to watch.

I think the best thing post S4 was the interactions and friends I made with people who still also had hope in the show. People such as

@myst-l-vie​- fellow Aussie and someone who is very passionate about people and her interests.

@stormynoon​- not sure if we talked OUAT I think that’s how we met (but we love\ TWD!)

@zumpie​- helped me enormously when I was bullied off the site and dealing with that.

@chrissascorner- helped me recover after I was bullied

@ deliriumdecadence- not just for OUAT chats but lots of great personal chats.

To you guys who are always around, friendly, and awesome to chat to-

@newyearsswifts​

@ultraericthered​

@awesomechocolatesauce​

@marvelouswhovianfairytales​

@zannereid27​

@fraddit​

@epona610​

@v-jolt

@rubbady-pubbady

@kereeachan

I’ve probably and likely forgot numerous others.

In the end you guys are what was most important during this time. I’ll never forget it!

And I’ll always treasure the first three seasons, OUATIW and bits and pieces from 4-6. It’s taught me a lot of what to do and most certainly not to do in creating a story.

Cheers!

-Mike

[daisy-chain-gardens]

Exchange Romance

A/N: Here it is! My first attempt at a Bughead fanfic. The formatting is a bit weird here because I wrote this on Google Docs. I haven’t written in a while and I edited this myself so sorry for any mistakes. I’m actually really proud of this and might possibly turn this into a multi fic if you guys like it so please let me know!

Summary: Betty Cooper is an exchange student from New Zealand who goes to America to live with the Lodge’s. She becomes fast friends with Veronica and her boyfriend Archie, but will how will she get along with their other friend Jughead?

Word Count: 6,101 (sorry guys, I got a bit carried away)

Part 2: https://daisy-chain-gardens.tumblr.com/post/162947052535/exchange-romance-part-2

25 hours flying and an hour long bus ride should be enough to tire anyone out but Betty Cooper was too excited to sleep. She was just minutes away from meeting her host family, the Lodges. Veronica, the daughter, had talked to Betty on social media a bit and she seemed really nice, and really rich. The photos on her Instagram showed Veronica wearing clothes worth more than Betty’s house and she was always tagging various models or socialites in her Facebook photos. Her life here was certainly going to be a big change from her life in New Zealand, and she couldn’t wait.

The bus pulled into the station and Betty recognised her instantly; a short Latina girl with immaculate hair and flawless makeup. Pearls, that Betty soon came to realise as her staple accessory, were strung around her neck, shining under the yellow light of the street lamps. A slightly older woman, who Betty realised was probably Mrs. Lodge, was standing next to her. Veronica ran up to Betty as she climbed out of the bus, pulling her into a tight hug.

“Hi B! I’m Ronnie. It’s so good to finally meet you in the flesh!” The older woman walked up behind her, sky high heels clicking on the uneven pavement.

“Miha! I’m Hermione. How was your flight?” Betty followed them to a long black car and filled them in on her trip.

“Oh my god, B your accent is to die for! All the boys at school are going to be crawling at your feet.”

“Um, thanks, I guess. When does school start?”

“Monday. Hopefully that’ll give you enough time to get settled and catch up on some sleep. Maybe Ronnie could even introduce you to her friends so you’ll know some other people before you start.” Hermione replied, her voice softer than her daughter’s but just as friendly.

The car trip back to the Lodge’s apartment only took about ten minutes but Ronnie took it upon herself to fill Betty in on all of the things which she deemed ‘essential’ to survive at her new school. Her boyfriend Archie and his best friend Jughead seemed to pop up a lot so she guessed that she would be seeing a lot of them over the next ten months. The excitement that Betty had felt on the bus was still there but now dominated by sleepiness. She managed to make it through dinner without closing her eyes for too long but she went out like a light as soon as her head hit the soft pillow.

——————–

The screeching of her alarm woke Betty up with a start much earlier than she would have liked. She got out of bed slowly and changed out of her pyjamas, not wanting to waste her first day in America lying in bed. She wandered into the dining room to find a full breakfast spread already on the table with a note from Hermione saying that she’d be back late this evening due to an event she had to attend. Ronnie hadn’t woken up yet so Betty helped herself to coffee and french toast before heading back to her room to finish unpacking. About half an hour later, the doors burst open and Ronnie strutted into the room. She looked like she’d been awake for hours, although Betty had a feeling that was due to the large mug of coffee she was holding with both hands. She was wearing makeup and a nice dress but no heels. For someone so small she definitely knew how to command attention.

“All right B, we have a big day ahead of us. First up, shopping, of course. Your wardrobe is adorable but I think we need to spice it up a bit. Don’t worry, it’s all on me. Daddy is very generous with my spending money and there is more than enough to go around.” Betty nodded in response, slightly overwhelmed by her energy but also happy that she had planned something for them to do. Ronnie didn’t mention her father very often but given the Lodge’s lifestyle, she assumed that he was very well paid and therefore very busy.

“Then, I asked the boys to meet us at Pop’s for lunch. Their milkshakes are to die for. I don’t know what we’ll get up to this afternoon but we’ll probably end up at Archie’s watching the boys play video games or something. Sound good?”

“Let me just finish this and then I’ll be good to go. Give me five?” Betty replied while continuing to fold the stack of clothes on her bed.

“Five minutes! Betty are you insane? It’s gonna take a lot longer than five minutes to get me ready to go out. I’ll come and get you in half an hour, maybe more if my hair is going to misbehave like it was yesterday.” Betty tried to suppress a laugh as Ronnie paraded out of the room. She didn’t quite understand why Ronnie would wear that just for lounging around the house. Betty used the extra time to sort out her desk and organise the few belongings that she’d bought with her. Although she had bought a sizeable stack of books, she couldn’t help but miss her extensive bookshelf at home. She made a mental note to ask Ronnie where the nearest library was as the two Lodge woman didn’t exactly seem the bookish type. How wrong she was. Ronnie still hadn’t emerged from her room 45 minutes later so Betty decided to explore the apartment a bit. The third room that she peeked into was huge with books covering every spare inch of the walls. She walked inside, awestruck, and started running her fingers along the shelves. She didn’t even hear the her host sister as she entered the room five minutes later.

“I thought I might find you in here.” Betty jumped at the sound of her voice, startled into dropping the book she was holding.

“Sorry Ronnie, I finished unpacking and you weren’t ready so I w-”

“It’s fine B. This is Daddy’s library. I must admit, I’m more a movie person than a book person and since Daddy is always away for business trips it doesn’t get used very often. Help yourself to whatever you want. And by the way, my close friends call me V.”

“Thanks V. You all ready to go?”

“Of course. I can’t wait to show you around. The shopping scene here definitely isn’t on the same level as New York or Milan but it’ll be enough for now.” She linked her arm with Betty’s, pulling her away from the books and into Riverdale.

——————–

Four hours later, the blonde collapsed into a red vinyl booth while the raven haired princess sat down elegantly across from her. Betty could have fallen asleep right then and there, and it wasn’t entirely due to the jet lag. Veronica may be small but she was a force to be reckoned with when she was armed with a credit card. Between the two of them they had bought more clothes than Betty had bought with her from New Zealand, proved by the numerous bags surrounding them in the booth.

“Archiekins just texted me saying that him and Jughead are on their way. They should be here in five. Do you want to order now or wait for them?” Ronnie asked her while fixing her makeup in  a small compact mirror she had whipped out of thin air.

As much as Betty wanted to order now, she couldn’t get her mother’s voice out of her head. Telling her to be polite and wait for everyone else before starting because no one likes a greedy girl. “We can wait, as long as they don’t take too long. Who knew shopping could be so tiring?”

“Oh my sweet innocent Betty, how else do you think I stay in shape for cheerleading? Heaven forbid having to go to the gym. Just the thought of it makes me gag. People seeing me sweaty? No thank you.” Betty’s laugh was covered by the twinkle of the bell over the door. “Archiekins!” Ronnie jumped out of the booth and wrapped her arms around Archie’s neck, kissing him deeply. “Hey Ronnie, long time no see.” She giggled as they sat down in the booth across from Betty.

A tall boy with dark hair, covered by a crown shaped beanie slid into to booth next to her. “No kiss for me Ronnie? I’m crushed.” He put a hand over his chest, feigning hurt although the twinkle in his eye revealed his amusement.

“Haha, very funny Jughead. Boys, I want you to meet Betty. She’s from New Zealand and she’s staying with me for the year so please try to behave. I’ve grown immune to your childish behaviour but I don’t want you to scare her off.” Ronnie shot Jughead a look full of ice and even Betty was a bit intimidated for a moment. Jughead gave Ronnie a innocent smile before turning to face the blonde sitting next to hi.

“G’day mate.” Jughead’s face held a huge grin as he put on a what he thought was a New Zealand accent, causing Betty to burst out laughing. “What?” His face fell slightly but he kept grinning at the sound of her laugh.

“It’s nothing it’s just that’s an Australian accent, and a god-awful one at that.” She answered, her eyes wet from laughter. Jughead’s face turned red and he ducked his head a bit, his grin shrinking from embarrassment. Luckily the waitress chose that moment to come and take their orders.

They sat in the diner for the next couple of hours, talking and laughing and eating. The boys spent a lot of time mocking Betty’s accent and she spent a lot of time laughing at how clueless they were about New Zealand. She felt like she had known these people all her life. The smile glued to her face showing how happy she was with her new friends.

——————–

Just as Ronnie had predicted, the group left Pop’s and ended up in Archie’s room after stopping of at Veronica’s apartment to drop off their shopping. The boys set up their video game and then started playing on Archie’s bed, leaving the girls to sit on Jughead’s bed on the other side of the small room. Fred came into the room at about 6pm to tell the boys that he was going to be out late and seemed surprised to see a pretty blonde girl sitting next to Veronica.

“Hi, I’m Fred, Archie’s old man.” he said, reaching out his hand towards Betty.

“Nice to meet you Mr. Andrews. I’m Betty, Veronica’s exchange student.” She shook his hand firmly, a friendly smile plastered on her face.

“Oh yeah, Hermione mentioned something about that. New Zealand right?”

“Yes Mr. Andrews. I just arrived yesterday.”

“Well welcome to Riverdale and please, call me Fred. Are you two staying for dinner? I was just going to leave the boys some money for pizza.” Betty looked back over at Ronnie questioningly, not really sure what was normal in situations like these.

Veronica piped up from her spot on the bed. “Sure we can Fred. Someone’s gotta keep these boys out of trouble when you’re not around.” She looked over at Archie and flashed him a playful smile. Betty’s eyes met with Jughead’s and a small smile crossed their faces.

Fred started to leave the room. “Knew I could count on you Veronica,” a grin on his face once his back was turned. He’d seen the look that Betty and Jughead had shared and recognised the look on his face as one he saw on his son’s face when he looked at his grilfriend. Jughead had a crush on the new girl.

——————–

Shortly after, the four of them were sat in the Andrew’s living room, waiting for the pizza to arrive and watching cartoons. Archie and Ronnie shared a large leather armchair and Betty and Jughead were sitting on a couch in the middle of the room.

“Why would you order a hawaiian pizza Jug? Everyone knows that pineapple doesn’t belong on a pizza.” Archie said from his chair. His thumb drawing small circles on Veronica’s hip as she curled into him. “But pineapple on pizza is the best thing. I honestly don’t understand how you don’t like it Arch.” Betty countered from her side of the couch.

“Thank you Betts. At least someone here has good taste.” He sent her another one of his small smiles and she felt butterflies in her stomach at the sound of her new nickname, sending her into panic mode. How could she have a crush on this boy already? She had only met him a couple of hours ago but they just seemed to click. Her panic was interrupted by her mother’s voice, always present in the back of her head. “This year is for academic purposes Elizabeth. You need to have something interesting on you CV for university applications ok? This means no boys. They will distract you and then that’ll waste this whole year for you, do you understand me?” Betty returned his smile before quickly looking down at he nails, picking at the chipped nail polish. The doorbell rang before they could continue their discussion. Jughead got up, grabbing the cash off the coffee table before disappearing down the hallway. He returned moments later with five pizza boxes stacked in his arms.

“Why do we have five pizzas if there’s only four of us?” Betty asked, opening the box containing the hawaiian pizza and helping herself to a slice. Ronnie untangled herself from Archie before reaching forward to grab a slice of the vegetarian pizza.

“Well, that’s one pizza each plus two for Jughead.” Ronnie answered matter of factly. Betty almost choked on her mouthful. One pizza each? If only her mother could see her now. After years of controlled diets and calorie counting this was certainly a change. Burgers for lunch and then pizza for dinner? It was a miracle that her new friends were all so in shape. Especially Jughead, considering Betty had picked up the vibe that he wasn’t exactly the sporty type.

“I’m a growing boy.” Jughead stated as if he could read her mind. He picked up one of the boxes and set it on his lap, causing the other three to burst into laughter as he started on his first slice. They kept talking and laughing until the pizza was finished. Betty only managed to eat three quarters of hers so Jughead happily finished off the remaining slices. They watched cartoons in comfortable silence until Betty felt herself drift off to sleep.

——————–

She woke up and felt someone stroking her hair. She sat up quickly, causing her to smack her forehead into Jughead’s chin.

“Ow. Oh my god I’m sorry.” Betty exclaimed, reaching up to run her fingers over the red spot on his face. “How long have I been asleep for?”

“A couple of hours, it’s about 11pm.” He replied, removing her hand from his face and holding it in his.

“Where did Ronnie and Archie go?” She asked while fixing her ponytail.

“Umm, they went upstairs a while a go so I thought it might be safer to stay downstairs with you. Plus you kind of fell asleep on my lap so…” He was thankful that the lights were off so she couldn’t see his cheeks redden. She was thinking the same thing. Not only because she’d fallen asleep on him but also because of his implication of what Ronnie and Archie were doing.

“I’m so sorry about that. Sadly one good night’s sleep isn’t enough to get over my jetlag.” He chuckled a little and stroked his thumb over her hand.

“Do you want me to walk you home? You probably don’t know you’re way around yet and you might have to wait a while for Ronnie.”

“Yeah that would be great thanks. I think I left my phone upstairs though.”

“No worries. I’ll tell Ronnie to take it with her when she leaves. Is Hermione home?”

“No she left a note this morning saying that she would be out late tonight. I don’t think that she’d mind though. I mean I only met her last night but she seems pretty understanding. Unlike my moth-” She broke off and looked up at Jughead who was looking back at her, waiting for her to go on. “Nevermind. We should probably go.” Her voice was soft and quiet as she looked down at her nails. Jughead took the hint and stood up. Leading her out the door. Her hand still grasped in his.

——————–

They walked home in a comfortable silence. Jughead occasionally pointing at things that they walked past to explain it or tell her about something stupid that Archie had done there when they were kids. His hand held hers the whole walk home and Betty was disappointed how quickly they arrived at a familiar door. She turned around to face him.

“Thanks for walking me home.” Her voice was soft and she looked up at him. It took her several seconds to look away and then she stood up on her toes to kiss his cheek. “Goodnight Juggie.” She quickly turned around and walked inside, closing the door softly behind her. He stood there, frozen in the summer breeze. He lifted his hand up to brush his cheek where her lips had been just seconds earlier. He turned and walked the whole way home with a smile on his lips, fingers brushing his cheek.

——————–

Veronica proved to be a lot more effective than an alarm clock since she managed to wake Betty up an hour after her alarm was supposed to go off.

“Good morning B! Ok, so, Jughead came back to Archie’s last night with a smile on his face. I have seriously never seem him smile like that. Ever. So spill. Don’t you dare forget a single detail because I will find out.” Betty yawned, slowly sitting up and stretching her arms over her head.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about V. I fell asleep on him while we were watching cartoons at Archie’s and when I woke up you had disappeared with Archie. Jughead offered to walk me home since I didn’t know how to get back here. That’s it. Nothing happened.” The blonde said sleepily. She didn’t need to look at Ronnie’s face to know that she would have a small pout on her lips.

“So you didn’t kiss him?” Disappointment evident in her tone.

“No V. We didn’t kiss. We did hold hands while we were walking but I don’t think he meant anything by it.” Betty tried to keep the disappointment out of her voice by getting out of bed and picking up one of their shopping bags from yesterday.

“You did WHAT? You held hands with Jughead? Oh my god B I think I’m gonna pass out from excitement. This is too much for this time of day. I need more coffee.” With that she was gone. How she managed to move so quickly in heels was beyond Betty. She chuckled and started to put away the clothes Veronica had bought her yesterday. Ronnie returned just as abruptly as she had left, this time accompanied by two large steaming mugs.

“I think you’re going to need some coffee to get through this conversation.” Ronnie said, offering Betty a mug. She accepted it with a grateful smile and took a slip before setting it on her desk and then sitting back onto her bed.

“B I don’t think you understand the gravity of the situation. Jughead is great but he’s not really a people person, let alone a girl person. Archie is basically his only friend and I think the only reason he puts up with me is for Archiekins. They’re basically brothers. There were rumors going around school last year that Jughead was gay but Archie helped stomp those out pretty quick. Jughead holding hands with a girl is like Archie losing a football game. It just doesn’t happen.” Betty blushed at Ronnie’s words and smiled down at her coffee as she felt the butterflies wake up in her stomach. Jughead liked her. Holy crap.

——————–

Monday came around a lot quicker than Betty expected. She had spent some more time with Archie and Jughead over the last couple of days. They’d hung out at Pop’s and then at Archie’s which led Betty to believe that this was some sort of routine they have. Nothing had progressed with her and Jughead which left her feeling a bit discouraged but then she remembered it had only been four days and she was there until the following June. Plenty of time to get closer to him. She was a nervous wreck on Monday morning. The nail polish on her fingers was completely destroyed and her bottom lip was turning red due to her teeth attacking it. Veronica went to school with her early to get their timetables from the office and give her time to sort out her locker. Archie and Jughead came and met them before class. Archie wearing a blue and yellow letterman jacket she hadn’t seen before and Jughead wearing his signature beanie which Betty had definitely seen before. She said hi to Jughead as Ronnie and Archie made out against Veronica’s locker.

“What do you have first Betts?” Jughead asked as his hand reached up and rubbed the back of his neck. He had to lean in a bit to be heard over the noise of the corridor and Betty picked up a scent which she had begun to identify with him. It was comforting to have something familiar in such an intimidating place.

“American History with Mr. Moreau.” She replied, her voice raised slightly.

“Oh cool. You can, um, sit with me if you want. I know Ronnie’s not in that class.” His eyes dropped from hers from a second but returned quickly. She could tell that he was nervous and the butterflies in her stomach obviously felt the same.

“Yeah that sounds great. You might have to help me because I know nothing about American history.” Betty sent him a small smile which made his eyes light up. He loved her smile. It was so warm and friendly. It was so Betty.

“Can you walk with me to class Juggie? I don’t know my way around yet and I think Ronnie’s busy.” He looked over at his best friend and laughed.

“I think that this is becoming a pattern Betts. Class is this way.” He’d grabbed her hand and pulled her gently through the crowds of students. It felt so natural, holding hands. Ronnie’s words came back to her and she smiled down at her feet.

——————–

The four of them had their after school routine down to a science. Archie would drive them to Pop’s after school for milkshakes. Ronnie and Archie would head back to school at about 5pm for cheerleading and football practice respectively while Jughead and Betty would walk back to the Andrew’s or the Lodge’s to do homework. Betty had asked Ronnie, during one of their gossip sessions, why Jughead lived with Archie and Fred. She had shrugged it off and said that something about Toledo before going uncharacteristically quiet. Betty decided not to push the subject and instead asked Ronnie about some new heels she’d seen on the doorstep that morning which perked her right up again.

——————–

Although they had a certain routine with Ronnie and Archie, Betty and Jughead also had their own little tradition; old movies and late night take out. They found out pretty quickly that they both shared an appreciation for old movies, especially Tarantino much to Jughead’s delight. It was a Thursday night and they were watching ‘Rear Window’ in the Lodge’s extravagant living. Their burgers were finished hours ago and they were curled up on the couch. Betty’s head in Jughead’s lap as his fingers ran through her hair.

“Juggie.” Betty said, turning slightly to face him. “What happened to your family?” Her voice was so quiet he could barely hear her. His fingers kept playing with her hair and he looked down at her, sending her that small smile that woke up the butterflies in her stomach. His eyes looked slightly sad and Betty suddenly felt guilty for prying, hearing her mother’s voice in the back of her head scolding her for being nosy. “I’m sorry, you don’t have to answer if it makes you feel uncom-”

“No, Betts, it’s ok. I had a feeling that you were going to ask at some point. I mean it’s not exactly normal to be rooming with your best friend in high school but since when has anything about me ever been normal?” He tried to hide the darkness of his statement behind a laugh but Betty could hear the sadness in his voice. She reached over to grab his other hand and squeezed it tightly.

“Um, so my Dad isn’t really in the best place. He, um, he has a drinking problem and one day, oh god. Betts, one day my Mum couldn’t take it anymore and she took Jellybean and left. I ,um, I haven’t seen them since. That was four years ago” He wasn’t looking at her anymore but Betty could still see the wet tears on his cheeks. Her eyes started to tear up as well. She sat up and stroked his cheek, one of his hands still stroking her hair. Betty leaned forward to place a kiss on Jughead’s cheek and then hugged him tightly. Jughead’s sobs were becoming audible as Betty shook against his chest. They stayed like that until the credits stopped playing and they’d run out of tears.

Betty let go first, untangling herself from Jughead’s arms but staying close. He caught her eye and then bought both hands up to cup her face.

“Jug?” Her eyes were wide and filled with wonder. He leaned forward quickly, almost as if he was trying to stop himself from getting psyched out. He pressed his lips against hers. Softly at first, as though he wasn’t sure of himself. He pulled away and waited for her to open her eyes, hoping he hadn’t just ruined everything. The smile that he’d fallen in love with crossed her lips slowly before her eyes opened to look into his.

And then she kissed him. Again and again. Whispering sweet nothings in his ear. At some point his beanie fell off his head and she ran his fingers through his hair while he did the same to her, her hair tie long gone. Eventually they pulled apart and fell back into each other’s arms, staring up at the black screen, their smiles bright enough to light up the dark room.

——————–

From then on, Jughead and Betty’s tradition changed. Not much, but enough. Their homework sessions were interrupted by stolen kisses, movie nights accompanied make out sessions and their takeout dinners always took a lot longer to finish. Somehow, their friends were still oblivious. Ronnie hadn’t pulled Betty aside to talk about how she looked at Jughead for a little bit longer than normal at Pop’s or how they always seemed to stand just that bit closer together. Neither of them were particularly surprised that Archie hadn’t noticed anything. Betty had only been in Riverdale for a handful of weeks and even she could tell that Archie wasn’t exactly the sharpest tool in the shed. It was a Friday afternoon and the four of them were sitting in their usual booth at Pop’s, sipping on various milkshakes. Ronnie and Archie stayed for a bit longer than usual because there was a game on that night. The red headed boy and the raven haired girl were trying to convince their friends on the other side of the booth to come and watch the game.

“Come on guys, it’ll be fun! And what else are you going to be doing tonight anyway? Watching boring old movies?” Veronica practically yelled at the pair before taking another sip of her chocolate milkshake. She had a certain glint in her eye which Betty had come to come to associate with determination. She looked over at Jughead and saw a similar gleam in his eyes.

“First of all Ronnie, we were planning on watching ‘Rebel Without A Cause’ tonight which isn’t a boring old movie, it’s a cinematic masterpiece.” He paused to let the point sink in but Ronnie just rolled her eye. “And second of all, why would we want to go and see a football game? You just watch some sweaty jocks run up and down the field and occasionally barrel into one another. No offense Arch.”

“None taken bro. What do you think Betty?” Archie took his attention away from Ronnie for the short time that it took to ask Betty the question.

“Well, I’ve never been to a football game before so-”

“WHAT? How have you never watched a game of football before? I know that New Zealand is a long way away but do you guys live under rocks? Honestly B. There’s no debate now. You have to come, even if it’s just to watch me cheer, ok?” Ronnie flashed Betty a sweet smile as she stuttered in agreement, still not used to her host sister’s ways of negotiation. Almost before she could blink, Betty and Jughead were sitting in the back of Archie’s car on the way back to Riverdale High.

——————–

Betty walked into the football stadium and was slightly overwhelmed. Even though it was relatively empty due to their early arrival, it seemed impossible for a school to need such a large stadium, especially just for football. Jughead watched her quietly, a chuckle falling from his lips as he watched her gape at her surroundings.

“Nothing quite like this where you’re from, huh Betts?” He quipped. He threw his arm around her, making the most of their friend’s absence.

“No not really. I mean, we have stadiums like this for regional rugby games but definitely not for any sort of school games.” Betty couldn’t stop looking at the expansive concrete jungle she was currently walking around. Jughead couldn’t stop looking at her.

“You really are something else Betts, you know that?” He said, pulling her closer and kissing the top of her hair. They found a seat in the middle of the stadium and sat in a comfortable silence. The seats around them slowly filled up as they watched the various athletes warm up. After about the first five minutes of the game, Jughead turned to look at Betty.

“Hey Betts.”

“Yeah Jug.”

“Do you even know how football works?”

“Not a clue.” Betty replied with a cute smile on her face. Jughead kissed the end of her nose and then proceeded to teach Betty all of the rules of the game. All those years being Archie’s best friend obviously payed off. She wasn’t really listening to what he was saying but watching him all the same. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about football and was actually cheering for his school by the end of the quarter. Betty was getting into it as well but mostly just copying Jughead since she still had no idea what was going on. She did cheer enthusiastically for Ronnie when she performed at half time though. Veronica had taken it upon herself to explain all of her routines and workouts to Betty when she first arrived. Even though she had no desire to actually be a cheerleader, she definitely had a new appreciation for them.

By the end of the third quarter, Betty thinks that she understands the basics of the sport and is starting to understand the need for such a large stadium. It’s addictive to watch and the atmosphere is unlike anything she’s ever experienced before. No wonder everyone comes along to watch the games.

Archie scored the winning touchdown just as the time ran out on the fourth quarter. Jughead went mental, along with the rest of the crowd, and kissed Betty square on the mouth. She forgot where they were and kissed him back, hard. Her arms wrapped around his neck as he lifted her up and spun her around. It was a bit hard in the confined space of the stands but it didn’t matter. They pulled away and smiled at each other, slightly out of breath before Jughead set her back down on the ground. Betty’s face changed suddenly. Eyes grew wide with panic as she looked around, searching frantically for Ronnie and Archie on the field. Archie was celebrating with his team and Ronnie was bouncing towards him with the other cheerleaders.

Betty stopped panicking and wrapped her arms around Jughead’s neck. Her fingers played with the dark hairs that had escaped his beanie. She kissed him soft and slow. A complete contrast to their last kiss but just as breathtaking. They broke apart slowly before walking down from the stands to congratulate their friends.

——————–

As soon as Archie’s car disappeared around the corner, Ronnie turned to Betty.

“Why didn’t you tell me about Jughead? How long have you guys been going out? How did this happen? Oh my god B, you have to tell me everything! I just have to get changed and then we’ll have some girl talk, ok? Be back soon.” Veronica disappeared and then reappeared half an hour later in silk pyjamas. She still had her pearls on. Betty smirked. Trust Veronica Lodge to look fabulous in pyjamas.

“Ok so spill. I want to know everything.” Ronnie said as she sat down on the edge of Betty’s bed.

“Well we kind of … had a moment a couple of weeks ago. We were watching a movie on the couch and I asked him about his family and it just sort of happened. He kissed me and then we’ve kind of been together since then, I guess.”

“Omg B, I’m so happy for you! What did I tell you about that accent? I can’t believe he told you about his family. I’m pretty sure Archie is the only one who knows what really happened. The only reason I know is because my dear, sweet, lovely Archiekins is the worst secret keeper ever. Jughead seems to really like you.”

“I really like him too. We haven’t really talked about it but it feels right, you know?”

“Yeah, I know. You guys are the cutest together!”

“Umm thanks, I guess V. By the way, how did you find out?”

“You two were sooooo obvious at the football game. And by the way, that kiss at the end of the game was totally hot.” Veronica teased before getting up and sashaying out of Betty’s bedroom. Betty flopped down onto her bed, her cheeks on fire. She quickly fell into a peaceful slumber, dreaming about grey beanies and flannels.

——————–

Fred had the boys helping him out on the construction site all weekend so Betty didn’t get to see Jughead until Monday at school. The two girls found Archie and Jughead leaning on their lockers waiting for them.

“Sorry for the delay boys but this hair doesn’t look like this by itself.” Archie smiled at his girlfriend whilst Jughead rolled his eyes. Betty leaned up and kissed him, leaving a surprised look on his face.

“What was that for?” He asked Betty before looking over at the other pair that made up their friend group. Archie’s faced was shocked but Ronnie just winked at the blonde girl.

“Oh, um, Ronnie saw us at the game so I just kind of assumed she would’ve told Arch already.” Betty trailed off, trying to hide her embarrassment by picking at her nail polish.

“Hey.” Jughead said softly. He grabbed her hands, forcing her to look up at him. He kissed her softly before pulling away and flashing her a butterfly-inducing smile. “I think it’s pretty safe to say he’s figured it out by now.” Betty smiles back at him. He wraps his arm around her shoulder and kisses her forehead. The duo walk together to their first class, leaving Ronnie to deal with an awestruck Archie.

“But, but, but I never even saw it coming!” Archie explained to Ronnie as she slowly dragged him in the opposite direction.

“I know my dear Archiekins. I know.” She replied, a smile crossing her face as she thinks back to Betty’s display of confidence. “But it kind of makes sense doesn’t it?”

[miss-m-calling]

Yuletide 2019 letter

Requests:

Jack Irish (TV) -- Simone Bendtsen, Jack Irish

The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (TV) -- Lenny Bruce, Miriam “Midge” Maisel, Susie Myerson

Starred Up (2013 movie) -- Oliver Baumer, Eric Love

Dear writer,

Hello and thank you for writing for me. I’m very excited to read whatever you come up with. I hope whatever I put down sparks your creativity, and feel free to reach out through the mods if you have any questions! My likes and DNWs are all the way on the bottom of the letter.

Without further ado…

Requests:

Jack Irish (TV)

Simone Bendtsen, Jack Irish

What is this canon: Australian TV show comprising three 90-minute episodes (with individual titles, like TV movies) in the first season, followed by two seasons of six hour-long episodes each. Guy Pearce plays the titular character, a hotshot Melbourne lawyer whose life goes down the drain when his wife is murdered, he quits his job, starts drinking and working as a debt collector. Despite not being a licensed PI, he keeps investigating suspicious disappearances, deaths, thefts, you name it, and getting into loads of trouble along the way. One of his sidekicks is Simone, played by Kate Atkinson, a fast-talking, snarky computer whiz and all-around odd duck, whose very existence on the show delights me endlessly. If you are in Oz, you can probably track this down easily, and if you’re in the US, the whole show streams on Acorn TV and the first two seasons are also available on DVD.

I enjoyed this show a lot: how often and unexpectedly funny it was, how absorbing the mysteries were even when I didn’t buy every plot twist, how the canon treated complicated adult relationships as complicated and adult, how everyone wound up in a better place by the end of every season than they’d been at the start but this didn’t always (or almost ever, really) mean a conventional HEA. I liked the intricate plots and all the Australian details of the setting, but I loved especially the character interactions and the ensemble cast, and these two reminded me of couples from old screwball comedies in how they played off each other.

Jack: dryly funny, always deadpan, tragic backstory but not overburdened with it, bit of a lone wolf but also with a lot of very different, good people in his life, sometimes his own worst enemy, not an alpha male at all and that’s just fine by him. And Simone, oh I loved Simone: smart, snarky, motor-mouthed, independent but also wanting to be taken care of a bit, somewhat socially awkward, hypercompetent, self-deprecating. I started shipping them right at the start (the “do you always talk this fast?” “do you always listen this slow?” exchange), loved how they keep needling and bantering easily, how during the time skip between seasons they become super close and rely on each other as both coworkers and friends. If you prefer to keep it platonic between them, I am also 100% on board for a really-close-friends version of their canon dynamic of mutual snarky respect! I have various, low degrees of tolerance for their canon relationships, so feel free to ignore or handwave those (in fact, please do ignore or handwave those!), and anyway: despite being clueless about pop culture, Jack knows Simone well enough to buy her a vintage Han Solo figurine in original packaging as a wedding present – and then promptly gets mistaken for her new husband!

Prompts:

-Casefic! Between Simone’s investigative skills and Jack’s willingness to get beaten up a lot and his sorta action skills, there’s no mystery they can’t solve. Possibly one or both go undercover in a dodgy company, or a dodgy government office, or at an ethnic wedding, or in another tight-knit subculture like the ones we see at the race track and the Prince of Prussia. Plus Simone in her ninja costume breaking into a medical research facility with a blasé Jack and a nonplussed Cam delighted me. Or how about an adventure which also includes Cam, Harry, Cynthia, Gus, Stanley and his Cherry Blossom…

-Jack brings Simone along (or Simone invites herself along) on a stakeout or a road-trip to run down money Harry’s owed. There’s banter. Lots of banter. And possibly falling asleep in the car.

-Simone gets to interact more with Cam and Harry, or with the old codgers at Jack’s local. Whether she and Jack are together or not, everyone can see it.

-Show me them growing close during the time between seasons: how they went from him calling her always “Miss Bendtsen” and teasing her about her dating profile handle to her wanting him at her wedding.

-Canon divergence: Jack goes to Manila to investigate the Holman-Dang Bank and brings Simone along, or calls/Skypes her for snarky consultations and finally asks her to fly out and help him. Danger, thrills, bringing down an international crime syndicate, and possibly sex ensue. Bonus points if they work together with Marek/Orton, he of the dry wit and the extensive local knowledge. Or Jack and Simone take part in some handwavy local ritual and wake up married.

-Takeout and movie night. Jack’s cluelessness about pop culture gets an airing, as do Simone’s definitive opinions on the merits of various movies and TV shows. There is banter, of course. All the banter. And probably some whiskey too.

-Instead of the council forcing Jack to move his horse out of his yard, he enlists Simone in helping him smuggle the horse (to a paddock on Melbourne’s outskirts, or another temporary shelter as ill-suited as Jack’s yard had been) in the middle of the night. If one or both of them end up riding the horse, all the better.

-Simone spends so much time and energy trying to be “normal” (get married, hold down an office job, be happy happy shiny happy), even as her true self keeps shining through, I would love to see her embrace herself for the square peg she is and just run with it, and with Jack trying to keep up, as he tends to do when she really goes off.

-Their first time. Especially if it’s a little awkward, and a little funny, and maybe they had a few drinks to psyche themselves up, and maybe they’re still figuring out whether they’re better as friends or they have real potential as a couple – and it ends up being enjoyable despite their hang-ups and insecurities. Then the morning after is its own special kind of awkward and defensive, but things still shake out alright.

The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (TV)

Lenny Bruce, Miriam “Midge” Maisel, Susie Myerson

What is this canon: Dramedy about Midge Maisel (played by Rachel Brosnahan), a young 1950s Jewish housewife from New York whose husband has delusions of talent as a standup comedian. When he abruptly leaves her for his secretary, Midge gets drunk and performs a hilarious off-the-cuff set at hubby’s favorite Greenwich Village dive, attracting the attention of Susie (Alex Borstein), the perpetually over-it club manager who offers to be Midge’s agent and help her build a career as a professional standup comedian. Also in the mix is Lenny Bruce (Luke Kirby), yes that Lenny Bruce, already an established comic and a sort of mentor (and bail buddy -- it makes sense in context) to Midge. Much fast-talking hilarity ensues, as does some family and relationship drama with Midge’s parents and husband, which IMO isn’t nearly as interesting as Midge building her career and interacting with Susie and Lenny. This is an Amazon Prime original show, so you can stream it there. Right now, it’s two seasons of 18 episodes in total; a third seasons drops in early December, and you absolutely do not need to watch that if you are writing me a fic for this canon! In fact, I would prefer it if you didn’t, as I may not have time to watch the new episodes before the Yuletide collection is revealed. Just use seasons 1 and 2, easy peasy.

I’m here for Midge’s adventures in the intoxicating, foul-mouthed, and often-frustrating world of comedy, so her dynamic with Susie and Lenny is where it’s at. Shippy or platonic, I just love the interactions between these three, and between every pair combination among them: Midge and Susie bantering and swearing and tits-upping even when they irritate each other, Midge and Lenny bringing the pathos as well as the humor, and Lenny and Susie both being hardened old pros with still a little glimmer of starry eyes. I am good with L/M/S or L&M&S or L/M & M/S – so, if you go the shippy route, either a V-shaped triad or hey, Susie (whom I absolutely read as gay) might find a way to be good with a full-on triangle… If you want to keep it platonic, True Companions all the way, always there for each other, even when they want to strangle each other. And as much as I like the comedy inherent in the characters, I also love that they’re all three, each in their own way, messed up people and dysfunctional to various degrees. So yeah, I just want Midge to hand the kids over to her parents, ditch Joel once and for all, marry (interpret that as literally or as loosely as you want) both Susie and Lenny, and for the three of them to ride off into the sunset to make comedy history.

Prompts:

-Does Susie manage them both? Does Midge open for Lenny on tour? Does he open for her??? Or they become equal stars on the comedy circuit?

-Maybe Lenny joins Shy Baldwin’s six-month tour, or they run into him while touring Europe or the US, and they all tool around, and yes I would love as much period detail and geography porn as you can throw at me. And while Lenny and Midge have seen the world, Susie hasn’t – her reaction to different foods, languages, customs, landscapes would be spectacular to witness. Especially if “different” is someplace as close to New York as Jersey or Connecticut, or someplace as far away and different as, say, Japan.

-If they do go to Europe, somehow or other they also tour the Soviet Bloc. Cue culture clashes, getting followed (or thinking they’re being followed) by the secret police, getting hammered on vodka and herring and pickles, and then when they get back to the States, the Feds grill them. It’s all dead serious, and Midge and Lenny refuse to take it as seriously as they should, while Susie is trying but the whole thing is really pissing her off…

-Lenny’s burned out, and Midge is just getting started. This dissonance may or may not find some sort of resolution. One thing’s for sure: Susie has limited patience for both Lenny’s depression and Midge’s need to make everything pretty.

-Instead of going to Joel for a no-way-is-that-closure fling after the Steve Allen Show taping, Midge goes to have a drink or seven with the two people who have, in their own ways, always been there for her and never let her down.

-Midge goes on TV again, this time as the star: longer set, prime time slot, dressing room, the works. She’s dying of nerves. Lenny and Susie coach her through it.

-Midge and Susie head out west to make it big and stay with Lenny once they’re in Los Angeles, and it’s marvelous (ha ha) and disastrous in equal measure.

-They all three get drunk, maybe with a hint of sadness if it’s the holidays (you can ignore my DNW about holidays, but please let that be just the background, not the lynchpin of the story) or someone’s birthday, and there’s a bar fight, running from the cops, eating greasy food at ass o’clock, and possibly kissing, not necessarily in that order.

-One or two or all three of them get arrested/have court appearances all over America and have to bail each other out, or find someone to bail them all out, or secure legal counsel – you get the drift. Or all three of them are trying to explain to a single lawyer what happened, talking over each other, the two pros not being able to resist landing zingers and Susie not being far behind, and the lawyer just getting more and more confused.

-They get in trouble some other way – offended patrons, surly management, shitty hotels, tour bus breaks down in the middle of Wyoming – and have to have each other’s backs because no one else will.

-Three-person road trip or tour, and only Susie knows how to drive. So Midge decides to learn, right then and there. And Lenny… Lenny may or may not be too lazy/hungover/lying about not knowing how. There’s supposed to be a rotation so everyone gets to stretch out on the back seat for equal lengths of time, but you know the system doesn’t work too well in practice. Also, they play games in the car to while away the time, and they do it their own way of course: I spy, cows on my side, yellow car, never have I ever, 20 questions, or riffing on whatever’s playing on the radio…

-They sit down to watch the moon landing (you can move it up a bit so it’s not happening a whole decade after S2) – by which I mean, Midge is all gung-ho about the moon landing, and Lenny and Susie are like whatever – and things don’t quite go to plan, but a good time is eventually had by all.

-It’s Yom Kippur again, and Midge wants to do the whole production: synagogue, breaking fast, the lot. Lenny and Susie would rather eat glass. Midge gets her way, of course. Does she decide to bring Susie and Lenny home to meet – or meet properly – her parents??? I bet Abe and Rose’s reactions would be something to see. (This too is an exception to my DNW about holiday settings – I just want stuff to get as crazy as it did the two times we saw Yom Kippur celebrated on the show, and for everything to still somehow turn out relatively OK.)

-Midge and Lenny have cheered each other up when the going got extra rough. I want for Susie to be especially down in the dumps – maybe her boozehound of a mother died, maybe some asshole told her she’s a shit manager and got her right in her insecurities – and Midge to rope Lenny into trying to cheer her up. And for Susie to fight them every step of the way but still be glad they care enough to try.

-Inspired by Susie’s brother looking just like her, by which I mean she and he and their sister look nothing alike, and by Lenny’s “she’s my mother” quip about Midge at the TV studio – Midge, Susie, and Lenny pretend to all be blood relatives, or mafiosi, or spies, or something else they’re not, while out in public, say in a restaurant. Just to be assholes and see how long they can keep it going before they break character or people figure them out, or call the cops, or something. There’s totally a bet on who corpses and breaks character first.

-Lenny and Midge do a (comeback) tour of the Borscht Belt, and all the Steiner Mountain Resort guests (especially the gossipy old hens from the beauty salon) and staff go to see them – and heckle.

-Stuff happens and they end up performing at some hole in the wall place where no one knows who they are (or no one believes it’s really those people they’ve seen on TV) – tough crowd, but a good workout for the two comics, and if Susie gets to threaten to rip off someone’s head, all the better.

-Lenny and Midge honing their routines – and maybe developing a double act – and Susie being all “oh my fucking god, what the fuck!!! … They’re actually good. I’m so proud.”

-Sharing a bed with two other people is an ongoing project: who sleeps (or refuses to sleep) in the middle? Who gets up during the night and why? Who starfishes across most of the bed? Who snores, and how does this get handled? If alcohol or pot have happened, how does that affect the sleeping arrangements? Also, Susie and Lenny witness and react to Midge’s beauty routine, ‘nuff said. Or, for various reasons one person after another ends up decamping to another room/bed/couch, but it doesn’t help them get much sleep or even stay there very long (this is inspired by my love of Shirley Jackson and her short story/humorous essay “The Night We All Had Grippe”). If you prefer to keep it platonic, most of this would work if they’re just sharing a double bedroom on tour (I leave the reason for why Lenny is bunking with the women up to you).

Canon-specific DNWs: S3 spoilers, explicit sex, and pairing any two as a / couple with the third as a & hanger-on. I’m here for equality in this three-way dynamic and the banter and the surprise!feels and the companionship. And of course all the comedy, situational or stand-up. Oh, and Lenny can still be his RL messed-up, drugged-up self – albeit the gentler version the show gives us – but it would be good if he didn’t kick the bucket a handful of years down the line.

Starred Up (2013 movie)

Oliver Baumer, Eric Love

What is this canon:

Gritty British prison drama about Eric (Jack O’Connell), a violent young offender who gets “starred up” (sent to an adult prison before he is legally an adult) and quickly gets into conflict with several other prisoners as well as guards and staff. He also gets roped into participating in a therapy group run by Oliver (Rupert Friend), a well-meaning if sometimes out-of-his-depth “posh boy” who sees Eric as something more than just an incorrigible thug. Not helping matters is the entire prison system, as well as the fact that Eric’s own father is doing a life sentence in the same prison and has very narrow views on how Eric should be behaving -- and talking about his feelings is not a part of it. The free-flowing conversations in the group therapy scenes are easily the film’s highlight, for me, as is the complicated dynamic between Eric and Oliver. So far as I can tell, this movie isn’t available to stream (well, not legally), but it is available on DVD.

More about this canon and these characters: Yes I do ship it, I do, I do!

Ahem. Don’t get me wrong, I liked what the movie did with the father-son relationship and its influence on both men’s character development – but I really wish they hadn’t got Oliver out of the action before the story’s climax (not like that!). The final denouement with Love father and Love son was great, as was the hint at the end that Eric learned something in anger-management group and has a support network that will help him a lot. But. I would have wanted to see more of the intriguing dynamic between Eric the intelligent, semi-feral, yet not-incorrigible, young thug and Oliver the educated, dedicated, kind yet aware of his own potential for violence (what was he on about with “I need to be here”?), slightly older counselor. They had me at Oliver’s “I want him” and Eric later telling his father that Oliver’s a better man than Love Sr. Also the not-flirting and the push-pull in the scene when Oliver picks up Eric from his cell - yowza!

Prompts:

-I would love to see Oliver return to holding his group in prison, so the two of them can interact more, either in the movie’s immediate aftermath or years down the line, as it’s implied that Eric will be serving a long sentence. Give me more scenes from anger management or the ribald, honest, free-flowing conversations in group, either with the other men present (I liked Hassan and Tyrone especially, among the group members) or a one-on-one session.

-An oblique or open-but-undramatic admission/declaration that they both know there’s something there, even if they don’t know what to do with it. Or, one or both of them knows exactly what to do with it, and the push-pull that would result from that.

-Dirty talk: used for arousal, as a defense mechanism, as a form of flirtation. Eric using slurs to assert dominance, and Oliver not letting him hide behind profanity, when he can use colorful language to express emotion and/or sexual interest. There could definitely be some verbal taunting/flirting about who wants/is eager to do what or is good at doing something. There may be some sniping comments about logistics and (lack of) condoms and barebacking and what men get up to in prison. There probably wouldn’t be deep discussions about sexual identity.

-An emergency in the prison requires a lock-down, so Oliver gets temporarily stuck in Eric’s cell or another room with only Eric for company. Things get porny and/or emotional.

-Eric is eventually released (you can handwave this so it happens soon after the movie or have it happen years later) and crashes with Oliver while he adjusts to the outside world. You guessed it: things get porny and/or emotional.

-How do they get to the point where both can cross that line from friends/whatever the hell they are and become, to lovers? (There’s Eric’s personal history and general discomfort with vulnerability, plus all the ways prison sex can be or make things complicated, and if it helps, I headcanon Oliver as either gay or bi and at least somewhat closeted, at work especially.) Who initiates and “directs traffic”? How does their always-contentious dynamic shift during and after sex? Is the sex an isolated (series of) occasion(s), or a progression/escalation over multiple encounters (how would I love especially an escalating series of encounters, let me count the ways)? Eric might seem like the logical initiator and/or dominant partner as well as using the possibility of sex to manipulate and exert control, but then Oliver might (or might not!) surprise him and is definitely the one more in touch with himself as well as aware of his custodial duty toward the men in the group.

-At some point in their intimate relationship (probably not right at the start, and probably not in prison, though if you can make it happen in prison, more power to you!), Oliver decides he’s going to take his sweet time and make Eric fall absolutely apart with pleasure, while using dirty talk to both arouse and empower Eric to own his desires – by that point, Eric is in a place where he can let that happen and enjoy it, even if he still talks tough.

-Role reversal: Oliver as the con (jittery, shut off, sticking out like a sore thumb in prison with all his fancy learning, yet no pushover) and Eric as the newbie counselor (kid from the wrong side of the tracks made good? Youthful hoodlum turned around his life, now trying to help others via tough love and lots of swearing and maybe a bit of manipulation when called for?)

 Likes:

I love pre-canon, canon, post-canon, canon-divergent, and missing-scene stories. I love character-driven and plot-driven stories equally, and I love fics which mix humor and angst/serious business when appropriate for the canon.

I love stories about characters at work and play, group dynamics, family dynamics (including constructed families), professional partnerships, friendships, alliances, rivalries, intimate couples (new lovers/first times as well as long-term/established couples), UST-ridden couples who are not just UST-ridden but connected in other ways too, etc.

I love irony, snark, humor as well as angst arising from the characters rather than the plot crowbaring it in, linear, non-linear, and 5+1 stories, hopeful endings, happy endings, bittersweet endings, worldbuilding, spiky characters who keep their jagged edges and spikiness in adversity as well as when their lives are going well, square-peg-in-round-hole characters, characters who are their own worst enemies as well as those who can get over themselves when the occasion calls for it, characters with conflicting values which may or may not be reconciled/resolved, characters who treat each other with respect and as equals even if they hate/annoy/can’t stand/love to dislike each other.

I especially love workplace stories (this can mean anything from an actual workplace/casefic/procedural setting to anything that revolves around the canon world in which the characters live) in which the characters are competent and dedicated to the job, and while they may not be exactly friends and they may well irritate one another, they still manage to rub along to get the job done and maybe even grow to care about one another (much to their surprise and sometimes reluctance/discomfort). Or, if they can’t get along, show me why not and what’s preventing them from finding common ground.

In terms of ship dynamics, I love (where it fits the characters) banter, competitiveness or antagonism shading into attraction (this tension need not be resolved), oh-god-why-did-it-have-to-be-you-what-did-I-do-to-deserve-this, bickering yet loving couples, characters who are serious about their romantic interests, characters who think they are much better at flirtation than they actually are, characters forced to work together only to prove much more compatible than they initially assumed, fics which mix an exploration of characters’ professional and everyday lives with shipping. A dynamic I cannot resist is shipping a couple who are incompatible in some important way (they are ideological enemies, cop and criminal, spies from opposite sides, one betrayed the other or they betrayed each other), and while they love and want each other they’re also not willing to change sides or surrender/compromise their identity for the other’s benefit, and how they might (or not) make their relationship work anyway.

I don’t have any very specific likes for smut, other than smut fitting the characters – show me how their canon dynamics spill over into the bedroom (or other place of congress). I also like sexual scenarios that subvert expectations a little and surprise the characters themselves (e.g., the person who’s usually quiet or more passive taking charge, the more aggressive person goes with it possibly snarking or commenting on it as long as they can). And I like sexual scenarios that contain an element of competition, antagonism, oh-god-this-is-a-bad-idea-but-we’re-going-for-it-hammer-and-tongs, not wanting to admit feelings or show vulnerability except oops it happens anyway, whether the characters acknowledge it or not, or just people getting way more into it or being more affected by it than they thought they would. When it fits the characters and their canon dynamic, you also can’t go wrong with we-both-wanted-this-for-forever-and-now-we-both-know-it-so-here-we-go-diving-in-headfirst. For het and/or slash, oral, vaginal, anal incl. pegging, manual (ifyouknowwhatImean) – it’s all good. You can go as veiled or as explicit as you like, but please avoid excessive medical jargon – I don’t find a lot of mention of “penis” or “clit” sexy.

 DNWs:

MPREG, A/B/O, knotting, D/s, kinks, incest, underage, genderswap/genderbent characters, xeno, non-/dub-con, torture and abuse (this and non-/dub-con can be mentioned if the story needs it, but please don’t dwell on it in loving detail or subject any of my requested characters to it), dwelling on bodily fluids (mentions of gore/blood and come are fine), toilet humor, character bashing, issuefic, gender/sexuality/race/ethnicity/religion/ability/identity headcanons, unrequested ships, soulmates and soul marks, major character death, serious illness or injury, pregnancy and children, holiday or wedding setting/theme, secondary characters shipping the main pair like it’s their job, reference to RL current events, 1st/2nd person POV, unrequested crossovers or fusions, AUs which have nothing to do with canon