#messy thoughts

[atomicrebelfire]

Buck is an unreliable narrator — and the writing does him no favors

Honestly, Buck has been such an unreliable narrator for his own story. We’re supposed to believe he’s this mature, grown man in his 30s dealing with complex feelings, but his actions scream otherwise. He avoids accountability, dodges confrontation, and leaves Tommy (and fans) guessing what’s really going on inside his head.

Buck won’t even call or text Tommy to clear things up after they break up — or after their messy hookup. Instead, he lets things fester and runs around asking everyone else for advice. How is this his story if he can’t even own it?

The writers are basically telling us Buck has no agency, no standing — that he needs Maddie, Chim, Hen, Josh, even Bobby’s permission to decide what kind of relationship he wants and how to manage it. He’s not a teenager. Did they forget this guy is eight seasons in, whose whole arc has supposedly been about growth and maturity?

The problem isn’t just that Tommy was “wrong” or “insecure.”

It’s that Buck was:

Passive

Vague

Emotionally evasive

And somehow, we’re asked to:

➡️ Blame the guest character for not reading Buck’s mind?

Yes — Buck should have checked in with Tommy. Especially after:

He initiated the hookup with clear emotional tension

He twisted the meaning of it, turning it into something casual without clarity

He was offended by Tommy’s insecurity instead of showing empathy

Even if Tommy ended things, Buck misled him by:

Hooking up without intention

Reacting with anger instead of reassurance

And yet the writing acts like:

“Poor Buck... just sniffle it out, put up a new shelf, and boom! You’re healed.”

That’s not character growth. That’s narrative evasion.

The bigger problem — the vulnerability imbalance

Tommy constantly shows vulnerability with Buck. He tells him he was jealous of the 118’s bond. He shares how his father and Gerard wasn’t supportive, and how hard it was not being out while working under someone like that. He openly admits his fears about getting hurt.

Buck? We rarely see him meet Tommy halfway. Even when he says he was afraid of losing Bobby (S7E10)— someone he considers like a father — he never really lets Tommy in.

In the breakup, Tommy was misguided but emotionally honest. That fear came from somewhere real. And before the hookup? Tommy says he wanted to reach out, and Buck replies with, “No way.” and nothing.

The next morning, Tommy tries again — asks what Buck’s plans are, brings up his insecurity around Eddie. And Buck? Lashes out.

Tommy leaves. Buck doesn’t follow. He doesn’t text. He goes to Maddie for advice. And when she tells him to learn to live alone, he just sniffs and does nothing.

This isn’t just inconsistent writing — it erases the emotional labor Tommy does and paints Buck as a passive, emotionally blank slate who never has to do anything to grow.

So we’re still expected to root for Buck as the main character?

Why is Buck allowed to be emotionally evasive while Tommy has to carry all the guilt?

Why does Buck’s story hinge on what others say — instead of him taking actual emotional risks?

If this is supposed to be growth, it feels like a step backward.

And the kicker? This isn’t even the first time Buck has acted like a passenger in a relationship. It’s the same story, just a new season. New Buck 8.0, same passive patterns, no visible growth.

You can’t keep calling it development when every emotional beat gets outsourced to side characters while the lead avoids doing the work.

Using abandonment issues as a crutch? That has limits.

You can’t keep handing Buck “abandonment issues” every time he refuses to exercise his autonomy — doing nothing is still a choice. That excuse loses power when it becomes a get-out-of-growth-free card every season.

And honestly? This wasn’t a relationship. It was a checkbox.

Not a real, messy, evolving romance. Not will-they-won’t-they. Not right person, wrong time. Not even a miscommunication arc. — one is a main character while other is guest at best.

This was one person refusing to use their agency — then playing the victim when things fell apart. I’m sorry, I have no kind words.

I wanted to do a full data-backed analysis of this relationship. I really did.

But then I saw season finale. Got mad. And thought, “You know what? Let me lash out now and be more rational later.”

I’ll try to be the adult in the next post. I swear. 😤 I still want to do a more rational, unbiased analysis of this relationship later — pinky promise. 🤦‍♀️🫶🙏 I love these boys, but man… the writers really fumbled this one. they suck!

[codenamesazanka]

tbh, 'saving' the villains in bnha feels a lot more like exorcism. (but worse.) There's a nearly-inhuman evil that's threatening to destroy everything; it turns out that this evil arose from some great human tragedy that occurred in the past; 'saving' is solely saving the heart, the spirit, the soul - by reminding the villain of things like family, love, friendship, giving them a moment of clarity; then the villain dies for good and leaves the world in peace, because it's too late to address or repair the tragedy, too late to ever make them part of the world again; and the living are left with a bittersweet sense of 'gee, that sure was sad' and 'if only the tragedy didn't occur/things were different', but there's nothing to do except 'I won't forget them'.

And like those are fine - in a story about lingering spirits and exorcism. I'm thinking like Kurosagi Corpse Delivery Service, Dandadan, the new Gegege no Kitaro movie. The dangerous and destructive spirits in those stories often have been terribly wronged by social injustice that they rise from the dead full of rage and seeking indiscriminate vengeance. No duh these spirits have to be stopped, and they are, by the main characters. They're sometimes stopped by a fight, yeah, but also by appeasing the wounded soul by treating them as human again - particularly when these main characters aren't actually exorcists, nor are people who have anything to do with the grudge, just people who stumbled upon this cursed scenario but feel the need to help out of human compassion.

The thing is - when the spirits disappear into air, it's fine because they were dead all along. There's nothing else to do except move on. I don't think it's fine at all for the Villains of HeroAca to kill themselves or die - basically saying there's no place for them in the world anymore (because the heroes aren't willing to create one) so they need to also move on to the next.

It's fine for the heroic characters of exorcism stories just simply say 'I won't forget' and just feel sad about the tragedy they just discovered. Simply being there as witness. They aren't official/legal guardians of society, not like the Pro-Heroes of HeroAcaLand. They have no obligation or duty they signed up for. Meanwhile, pro-Heroes do. they should be addressing societal injustice head-on, looking for the causes of tragedies that create villains and preventing them; should've been doing that all along, or at the very least realize that during the final act (and not afterwards - and barely at that.) failing to do so means they failed in the final battle, and so didn't actually win, and especially not be called "greatest heroes."

"Supernatural Evil is created from much more mundane but just as soul-crushing evil, and it is a profound tragedy, and we gotta deal with this concentrated accumulation of hatred, pain, resentment, usually by righting a wrong/destroying the source of mundane evil/giving the spirit peace." Great! but because bnha is not a ghost exorcism story and the protags are explicitly heroes who are supposed to save people (and also have a degree of control over whether tragedy occurs in the society they preside over), it's not even a good and satisfying ghost exorcism story

[watchinglikeafangirl]

Top Form is one of the best-produced BLs I've seen until now. It's the first thing I noticed, a really expensive production. It looks hella good.

And their chemistry...I am living for their scenes mirroring their relationship status.

I wasn't sure about Jin at first but what truly amazes me is how he is introduced. We see his face very clearly in the beginning but he's just a bland character, he is the protagonist without a personality. Then we get multiple acting scenes and his eyes are mostly hidden by his hair. When I truly saw him, already half the episode has passed. I feel like I've only seen him for real when he and Akin have their first proper conversation. Not by the time Akin helps him to cry but when Jin walks up to him to thank him. He wears an entirely different expression, it's truly him, his eyes are glowing, he shows a very charming smile. It's the first time I saw him, it's the first time Akin really sees him.

In general, a masterpiece when it comes to storytelling and pacing. The scenes that are supposed to touch my heart truly mesmerize me, the scenes that are supposed to cause stress are scaring me and some scenes are so long but develop so naturally time seems to be flying. When Akin helps Jin to cry...I knew this was gonna be great. And then they act out Akin's character's death which is such a powerful scene. I haven't felt that connected to any characters. It seems to be flowing naturally and these two aren't who they seemed to be. They are so much better and so much worse, they feel very real.

Their kissing scene in episode 4 honestly made me cry just because so many things were left unsaid while these two seemed to scream at each other through their eyes. Episode 4 is great, the whole 21 days-theory paired with a following distance, some overthinking and a desperate attempt to confess. Because Jin fell first but Akin fell harder. They are so desperatly longing and so respectfully worshipping each other.

Great casting. Great editing. Great storytelling.

[purgaytorysupremacy]

oh nuts. a life experience has given me a new layer of perspective on Cas's homosexual declaration of love to Dean.

recently I had occasion to tell a person I had feelings for them knowing full well they didn't feel even a twinge of the same thing for me. while the whole thing was a decidedly unpleasant experience, I kept laughing at myself internally bc I didn't want to say "the happiness is just in saying it" like fucking Castiel over here. (we don't need to talk about it, it's fine.) (I am happier having said it and it's kind of bullshit, but I digress.)

because the thing is, the happiness isn't in just saying it, right? the happiness is in the having. I made a whole TikTok "proving" that the Empty didn't come for Cas when he confessed his love, but rather when he realized Dean loved him back. even for Cas, the happiness was in the having, not in the saying, however brief it was.

and I've always been one of those people who rolled their eyes at the whole concept. why would the happiness be in just being, in just saying it, if it's right there in front of you to have. and then it hit me like a tonne of bricks (as I was washing my kitchen counters).

Cas really didn't think he could have Dean.

at all. in any capacity. he really, truly, and honestly felt to the depths of himself that Dean did not have any twinge of similar feelings, that this really was a Hail Mary shot-in-the-dark. and I think me, personally, really didn't understand that about Cas. that his belief in his love being unrequited was that unshakable.

something else I've been pondering is how audiences have so much more empathy for fictional characters who share traits that IRL they find objectionable and unappealing. but the thing is about fictional characters is that we follow them around in their most private, vulnerable moments. we see Dean mourning Cas when he dies, literally killing himself because he can't live without him, but it's so easy to forget that we're the omniscient ones here.

Cas never knew.

Dean's whole thing was pushing him away, keeping him at arm's length, making it seem like whatever heroic thing he does for Cas he'd do for anyone. he downplays how important it is for Dean to share the Deancave with him, to show him his favourite movies, share his favourite songs. he acts like the things Cas does for him don't mean that much to hide how much they do mean. he uses "we" whenever he even gets in the vicinity of expressing a feeling. "We were worried." "We're glad you're back." "We needed a win." "You're our brother." The audience knew the difference. We saw how he'd clench his jaw or swallow hard or make a face that said "God, I'm being such an idiot". Because we saw him in those little moments. We got to see the cracks in the mask.

but Cas never knew.

the self-hating angel of Thursday was never going to think it was all a way for Dean to protect himself. obviously, that's the delicious tragedy of it all, but what I think I realized at the end of all that is Cas confessing his love to a Dean who didn't love him back wouldn't have worked. Because the happiness really is in the having. If happiness was just in saying it, then The Empty would have come before Cas even finished getting the words out of his mouth.

so Cas's plan wouldn't have worked if Dean didn't love him back.

this is just me yapping on about my own nonsense, but I do think it's really interesting. there's contentment in "just saying it". there's freedom and relief and an unburdening. I think one can argue that it makes being happy in the being easier. there is certainly some joy in telling a person you think that highly of them. but true happiness?

nah.

true happiness is always going to only be in the having. Cas didn't understand the difference until he experienced it, and by then, it was too late.

[transparentcheesecake2]

Been thinking about the takeover answer regarding Sonic and Silver

With Sonic saying they having a little brother and older brother situation. It does surprise me a bit and I don't really think they show those vibes when they interact. They're more like equals. Buddies buddies. Good friends. I like to think Sonic just sees Silver as a younger brother rather than the fact its their dynamic, cause I bet Silver doesn't even see Sonic as his older brother figure.

Maybe Sonic see's Silver as a little brother because Silver is Younger? And acts younger? Since Silver is 14 and Sonic is 16. It could be also because Sonic has grown to be Tail's influence so acting like the big brother is just instincts to him.

Does Sonic see's everyone who is younger than him a little brother? Does he see's jet as the annoying little brother? That would be funny. Sonic takeovers aren't canon anyway and they are clearly written to be as jokes so I shouldn't take it too seriously but I just really like to think stuff.

[cookiiemancer]

Aw, he finally snapped out of red-eye mode! Why was he so...Off to begin with? And what part of the game helped pull him out of that state?

He was just reactivated recently after spending a good few years in a warehouse watching but being not able to move until his battery wore off. He's also a theater bot but never got to perform, so imagine his surprise when he sees 2 bots that are awfully similar to him. Of course he doesn't know that he was a prototype and he wasn't supposed to do anything.

He basically sees Sun and Moon as competition and is afraid if he does something wrong it'll get him deactivated again. When Gregory steps in and gives Eclipse some old video games, he feels like he can relax for the first time, also discovered his first and new hobby. Gregory is a kid, of course a kid wouldn't do anything bad to him.

He's not talking to either Sun or Moon yet. That's another comic still in the making, i got to let it cook for a bit.

[boolger]

Something something what if gn!Reader got revenge, mdni 18+, cw: mention of past kidnapping and non-con, violence, drugging and murder. Death of main characters. This is far from my best writing but here it is. Also no idk how poison works don’t come for me

You had escaped four years ago.

They had tried finding you, using a ridiculous amount of resources but every time they found a clue or a sign, you were long gone. It was Kate who knocked some sense into their heads, demanding their attention back in the game or stop working - so they abandoned the dream of you, spending their few vacations to look instead.

Nothing.

You had been perfect for them. A scared little thing, crying and whimpering, so naive and stupid, not understanding how dangerous the world was, how they were helping you. Together they molded you into a perfect being, the many days spent in the dark of their basement making you pliant, the many punishments making your tears dry up and learning to be tougher. They made you a new human being, happily sucking them off, spreading your legs when told, making them food and living up to their fantasy of a perfect little partner at home, doing the dishes and laundry, ready for them when they came home.

Four years had passed faster than they would like, they had even considered finding someone new, to take your place. To fill up that dark, loving hole in their hearts.

That was until they were eating at a small restaurant in France, a pitstop after a long but successful city, before they would return to the UK. Their waiter had taken their order and they sat in a private room, happily using money to pay for privacy to talk about what they wanted and enjoy themselves.

Except, the waiter who entered the room with their food elegantly balanced on their arms, wasn’t the one who had taken their orders —

It was you.

You had a polite smile that you probably used on all customers, greeting them as you entered, but stopping the moment the door closed after you - eyes wide, plates beginning to shake.

“My my,” Price rumbled, as you saw all of their eyes darkening, “what are the odds?”

It was like you were back in the basement, begging for food, for light, for human interaction.

“Serve us our food, pet,” Ghost said, barely blinking, looking like he was ready to pounce, “why don’t ya’ join us, yea?”

As if you had never escaped them, you immediately obeyed, even though you were shaking with fear, which they had trained out of you back then. You sat next to Price, who immediately pulled you closer, hand roaming over your side and hips.

“Fancy coming home soon?” Gaz asked and you knew it wasn’t really an option to say no, not with how Soap also stared at you hungrily, cutting his steak and eating a big bite without even looking away.

“Y-yes,” you whispered, desperately looking around on the table, “don’t uhm, don’t you need more beer?”

The men laughed - Price’s hand tightened on your thigh.

“No, pet,” he replied, “I think we’re gonna take this meal sober. Do you help in the kitchen here?”

You nodded nervously, hand shaking as you pointed to one of the small bowl of sauce that they all had, “I always make the sau-sauce, sir.”

“Remembering your manners, huh?” Price teased, “why don’t me and the boys taste then, see if it’s good?”

Something something I don’t understand poison, but it was shortly after that you stumbled away from Price, who grabbed out after you, falling down over the chair you had just sat on, foam evolving from his moan as he let out a painful sound just like the others.

Ripping your small gun from your boot felt as if it took forever, especially with Ghost charging towards you, a loud monster-like groan escaping him as he almost jumped over the table, only stopping when you delivered 2 bullets into his head. He fell right in front of you, dead - the others weren’t completely dead and you walked to them with shaking breaths, ignoring their looks as you shot them between their eyebrows, one after one. As soon as John Price laid dead together with Kyle Garrick, Johnny MacTavish and Simon Riley, you moved.

Out the window, down the path behind the restaurant, knowing the route you had rehearsed so many times by now.

Disappearing into the night, monsters bleeding out on a cheap carpet in a restaurant that was blown into full panic.

[rossiiella]

Yes, I See Myself. Every Day.

Why does family think it's normal to criticise your body? Like it's something helpful. Like I haven't already notices. I've thought about changing everything — my nose, my chest, my height, even my skin tone. Anything that might make me feel just a little bit more okay. A little more... enough. But what I don't get is why they keep saying it, like I don't own a mirror. Like I don't wake up and see myself every single day. They act like it's a new discovery — something they've just noticed and feel entitled to point out. Over and over and over again. It doesn't help. It just makes me want to disappear into someone else. Someone they'd finally stop trying to fix.

[insert-non-taken-name-here]

I love Kaveh and Alhaitham's relationship, if u don't see them as romatic that fine, I just love when people talk about the nuance of their relationship. Though I also just love discussions about the Intricacy of characters in general, lol.

This person was way better at talking about them than me, I didn't talk much about how they are mirrors cuz this person does it so much better, lol

They do no hate each other they just have history together that feels tough to get over, both go out of their way to make sure the other is happy or at least more comfortable. They just don't talk about it, like after the even when Kaveh treated their friends, Alhaitham KNEW he would bring home the leftovers and just started heading home immediately after we told him that Kaveh treated everyone, while Kaveh actually ordered more food to bring home just for him.

Or the fact that Alhaitham wears his soundproof headphones to sleep when Kaveh works at night, instead of I don't know asking him to stop? (though that is a bit more debatable whether or not he has and it just persists or if he never brought it up before, I just wanted to add it lol)

I also say someone point out the other day that the only times we have seen Alhaitham at home is when Kaveh is also home.

Or even just the fact that Kaveh calls it a home in the first place, because he has stated that there is a difference between a house and a home.

"Home," huh...I've designed many houses for others, but a house isn't really the same thing as a home. A house can simply be a pile of wood on a plot of land, but a home cannot exist without inhabitants — the presence of people is what turns a house into a home."

They both appreciate each other and what they do for each other. If not Alhaitham would not have let Kaveh into his house if he did not care for him. Or you could just look at their body language and speech patterns. You can really see it with Alhaitham. His body language is much more open around kaveh, and is much more expressive too. He also teases Kaveh, which he doesn't really do for others. Like with the thanks he typically just accepted it and moves on, with Kaveh he started talking about how it should be given thrice and just teases him about it. This was after he was researching into Sachin which lead him to more info about Kavehs dad (I wonder why he had a interest, possibly kaveh).

Kaveh even says in his voice line about Alhaitham that "Alhaitham helped me out a fair amount recently. If we were still as close as we were during our student days, then I'd be thanking him every chance I got. Now, though... I can't seem get a word of appreciation out of my mouth. Even if I could, I wouldn't want to give him the satisfaction. I guess you could say our relationship is something of a mixed bag these days? Honestly, with everything that's happened, it almost feels like the universe has been playing pranks on us... It's hard to make sense of it all... too much to process for one lifetime. I will say that it's not every day that you get to know someone like him — I just wish he could rein in some of the worst excesses of his personality. Okay, yeah, that's never gonna happen."

They were much more open with each other before the fight when they were students. They didn't really see each other in person much until they moved in together later on. That is not to say that they did not stay in contact, they still debated in many books throughout the library through annotations.

I really should stop now, I just really love talking about characters and their nuances....oops....sorry I got distracted like halfway through this and just started going on tangents lol ... Im not even sure most of this makes sense lol

[ebi-noodle-doodles]

Had a 💡 moment.

Currently traveling and I badly want a fighting game with vocaloid/megpoid/utauloid characters in my head. I’m eager to learn game dev/ coding for this specific idea. I’m madly in love with

I designed Catsune/Nyatsune Miku with hair paws/claws. I also just came up with

Nyatsune Miku- Hair paws/claws. Her basic attacks are ofc her hair punch, spam and you get a hair stand oraoraoraoraora! Her hair grab and 👋 slap. Popipo vegetable juice riding it and running across the screen, leek helicopter (levanpolka). World is mine, love is war, brs and other that i could think of as song finishers

Luka Megurine - Ofc, tentacle hair. Octopus Luka. Her attacks are giant baseball throw of tako luka with a giant tuna, giant tuna smash, fresh catch, & hair grab. Some ideas for her finishing songs are JBF, Night fever, World dance hall, enbizaka, Magnet

Meiko- fox, cus it just seem fitting and she ate. Basic attacks are her sake, swinging her microphone stand, maybe a drunken fist style? Top of my head for a song finisher is conchita, will do more research since I forgor the others

Kaito- Wolf? cus Im basic. His attacks are ice cream/popsicle related! Freezes the enemy. Slaps them with giant popsicle & basic attack with his long scarf. Id like to add stuff like if he wins against a gakupo enemy madness of duke plays lol bunch of song finishers in my head cant remember titles-

Rin and Len- still not sure if otter or fennec. But Lens design would focus on his banana hair, he takes it out like my nendoroid and he throws it like a boomerang, he spamms and regrows his banana hair and ofc rin on her ribbon, ofc theres a theme here and its gonna be a huge ribbon, thinking if she uses each as shureken to mirror len’s banana boomerang throw! Also thinking if she could fly like Tails with it- 🚁 Too tired to list the songs but ofc ill include the daughter of evil series on everyone

Gumi- Rabbit. I love love love LOVE gumi and I remember her being 🥕 so a rabbit/bunny seems fitting! Giant carrot ofc, carrot attacks, her harvesting and pulling out the carrot only to bonk the enemy with it. Some songs that have two voice banks singing it would appear in their song finishers like Matryoshka!

Gakupo- Tiger? Lion? Still not sure but one of the finisher songs is def gonna be Madness of Duke- where if you finish of the enemy *you win* signs appear and him and the “ladies” are all lined up in the bg? Cant explain it properly but ye. Dancing samurai, go google it are on top of my head

This idea is heavily inspired by Super Gem fighter 😭 I love that game so much I want something similar except in the consecutive acts where like you change “outfits/designs” in Super Gem fighter (SGF) in this game you do it also with Song references changing outfits/designs/ base on that songs mv and each phase of the attack is a different song reference where if you finish of an enemy in that phase of the attack you finish them of with the song and stay on that costume/outfit/design and have like a finishing move or moment i.e Len vs Rin Daughter of evil and Servant of evil, Rin(Player1) finishes off Len(enemy/player2) and winning the game, Rin crying after-

Ofc theres secret characters. Top of my head rn is BRS. Not sure if Teto should be a secret character. Maybe her old design and then her new one is included since you know her being official! Additional characters/content would be Kaii Yuki, Vflower, SeeU, Iroha, Lily, IA and more. Theres so much still on my head and I want to make it happen 😭😭😭😭

Just blabbering my thoughts if anyones gonna even read hahah! Its really cold from where i am rn 🦭 This sparks inspo when I get home

Also this is a pixel base! Gotta love them classics

[sybersepticeye]

Had a weird dream, it was set like everyone was going back to the who killed markiplier building and i was with Wilford a lot but he was wearing his colonels outfit and at some point he disappeared then was seen arguing with himself about deaths , then he made up some game with a dragon

I think the entity was there and was trying to create more chaos but I remember seeing a body being thrown to the ground by something and then detective abe getting up off the ground then walking out the building

Also another part Wilford got into an argument with himself again but more literally. He saw the colonel and pointed a gun at him and then they had knives and the room was a bit dark but they threatened each other

It was a messy confusing dream but the dragon looked cool idk why it was there though

[ribbonsandruin]

i don’t think people really get how much it messed me up.

on one side, i had someone send me an email calling me a cancer in their life, a gaslighter, saying i deserved to go to hell. and on the other, i had a whole group of people i trusted just... turn on me.

i wasn’t perfect and i know that. i got angry. i broke down. but i didn’t lie. i didn’t manipulate anyone. i was defending someone i cared about, and somehow that made me the worst person alive.

no one asked what actually happened. no one wanted the full story. they just made up their minds, blamed me, and moved on like none of it meant anything.

i know i didn’t handle everything the best. i didn’t explain myself. i just left.

yeah, i know that probably looked bad. it made people uncomfortable. it made it easier to make me the problem.

but i wasn’t trying to get attention. i wasn’t trying to make anyone feel guilty. i was overwhelmed and didn’t know how to say anything without falling apart.

and instead of checking in, i got torn apart. picked apart for how i looked, who i was, all the things i already hated about myself. and everyone else just stood there and let it happen.

and now i’m the one stuck with all of it.

[buildingunderstanding]

Don't mind me, I just need to ramble for a minute.

I was just watching this video about who the concept of monotheism isn't actually in the Bible like I was taught, and I've seen several break downs about how the concept of the trinity isn't really an accurate idea.

Now, I was taught which verses to use as evidence for the trinity, and there was often a stress on being able to prove my beliefs, didn't matter what it was if I believed something about the Bible then I needed to be able to prove it with the Bible. I was also taught that the concept of the trinity was beyond human understanding and it was a concept that just needed to be accepted by faith. That while it could be proven through specific verses, it wasn't a concept that our human minds could fully understand and just needed to be accepted by faith.

This has made the shift to Norse Paganism specifically...almost comical? For example, I remember watching another video, that was discussing Loki and how examining different texts and different kennings for Loki, it's reasonable to draw the conclusion that Loki is actually Lođurr in the Voluspa.

Is this idea absolutely proven? No. Do I choose to believe it anyway? Yeah.

Because I was taught that I don't have to fully understand something to believe it.

The way I was taught faith and a lot of things about religion and whatnot from the church wasn't great. But it did teach me something things that have helped me adjust to this new way of faith.

I was taught that personal experiences with the Christian God and Jesus were evidences of their existence. By that logic, personal experiences with other deities are also evidence for their existence. Yeah, there are still things that I trip over now and again, like being taught that Satan is always looking for opportunities to deceive people, but if I can accept praying that I'd get home safely and seeing a rainbow as a sign from God that my prayer would be answered, then I can accept my interactions with Loki as real too.

The church messed me up in a lot of ways, but teaching me that sometimes you just have to accept things by faith wasn't one of them.

[ylvaisawolf]

Messy thoughts on Fred (and Tubbo?)

This is really disjointed. This was just me typing everything that popped into my head down.

I have opinions on Fred (and everything around him atm)

Like everyone saying he is evil. Fred himself knows he did wrong things 

He knows he isn't a saint he just has a single person hae loves and cares about [Tubbo]

Fred told Tubbo he did wrong things and yes he did not specify what (From what I recall) but he told Tubbo and he said he didn't care (Tubbo said he would be a villain if Fred is sooo…)

Is it very cruel to tell someone you wish they would get tortured again? Yes! Hell yeah it is. 

Quackity has his reasons for hating the Feds no shit but he threatened Tubbo which is why Fred said that.

(Also I am biased towards Tubbo. I am Foolish/Jaiden in spirit aka I side with the characters I like more over my irl morals)

Like I do think he cares because he has to for the other workers but they are not friends, they are his underlings or bodyguards so you have to be nice there (Or you would hope. Even if manipulative)

Like I would be an idiot to not acknowledge him taking notes on Aypeirre’s torture or again his very cruel comment to Quackity

Fred acts different ways with different people. Like he is definitely more nice with Tubbo for example when he said he was a bad penpal for not responding much and “I genuinely felt like a stalker and that it wasn't morally correct what i was doing…”  (Day 195) of which Tubbo responded in his letter back with “ I don't think you should worry about the morality of trying to find them as kidnapping itself is very immoral.” 

Which is true but still.

Fred also said on the day of the movie date he has done bad stuff to Tubbo. (“You don’t understand, I’ve done bad stuff.” … or something similar as I am not watching the vods.)

So to me I am wondering where some people have been?

Fred is deny deny till he cant then bites back when out of options 

He is seemingly questioning himself and the Feds but atm he is following them along still

Back to Tubbo for a sec I have to mention that he said something along the lines of It seems everyone but the morning crew likes him so it wouldn't be hard for him to be a villain.

I keep bring that up whoops but like Tubbo is really protective of Fred warning him to stay away from Aypierre and that he will gladly listen to anything that worries Fred

Tubbo and Fred really love and trust one another.

ALSO!

Fred wrote on October 8th “I must admit… I don't know what my morals are or trust for the Federation is..” 

Man knows he is messed up <3 

(Also Tubbo just told him it is ok to question your morals)

Fred not trusting the Feds doesn't mean he doesnt follow what they want like torture btw. I am not ignoring that dont worry 

He still is doing his job. He acts like he doesn't like it but he is still doing it.

Also Fred at one point told Philza he loves snitching. Yes, kinda sassy but he did say that. (I think October 4th or 5th)

If it isn't obvious I Adore Fred even if he turns out evil. I find him to be a very interesting character.

Also I am not touching him leading Tubbo, Roier, & Slimecicle to the Maze. I have no idea what the deal is there.

Yeah this post is a mess but I don't normally post my own thoughts or do essays (this isn't even an essay). If I wanted to put more effort in I could but me typing my thoughts down and semi looking for direct quotes is all this post is getting haha.

I don't care if Fred gets better or worse as long as he is a fun and interesting character the whole time .

[mylifeintheselines]

A Messy Poem: Just Like My Feelings

Every time I look at you, My chest tightens — My heart pounds so loud, It feels like it might burst, Like it’s about to explode.

Every time our eyes meet, I just want to keep That moment forever — Locked in eternity.

When we talk, I forget how to act. How do I keep up the conversation When I’m so afraid of rejection?

Your dirty blond hair, Those soft brown eyes — A combination almost angelic, Not like anyone else alike. You give off an aesthetic, Golden retriever vibe.

But it’s not just your looks — It’s also your smile, When you share one with me, I wish this were what I could see For the rest of my days, Forever and always.

You are so soft spoken, Not at all broken, With your soothing voice — Not like any other boy.

And no, not only that — But also the fact: You have a little sister, And you’re such a good listener.

You’re just… so kind. Truly one of a kind.

thank you for reading this mess. he’s probably never gonna read it. no, that won’t stop me from writing poetry about him at 2am like it’s my full-time job. delusional and hopeless romantic? absolutely. anyway, thanks again.

[ariesintheshire]

i don’t want much. just to be pinned, praised, and ruined like I was made for it.