#this was basically one of my only options. all the others were cheaper but much shittier locations

[southislandwren]

I love my fucking apartment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[bogleech]

REVIEWING THIS WHOLE BAG OF RUBBER BUGS:

I mentioned recently that bags of cheap rubber bugs are harder to come by in real stores, but that there are a few options for them online. I just received this set from Aliexpress that’s currently only $4 with free shipping, you might even find the same set cheaper since there’s multiple listings for it, but I can verify this source is using an accurate photo and I am now going to REVIEW THEM:

SPIDER: obligatory, all-purpose spider, ambiguous species, noodly legs, minimal paint application, 3/5

COCKROACH: nice silky black coloration on the back, tan on the underside, rather haphazard leg pose, I like it but in terms of objective quality it’s unfortunately a 2/5 compared to other fake roaches and even to other bugs in this set.

DRAGONFLIES: so this set is definitely pieced together from what were once multiple different rubber bug sets, but I can also confirm that you always get the same selection I’m reviewing, which includes several redundancies. You get both a large and small dragonfly with entirely different sculpts, the smaller one more accurately sculpted but not as dynamically painted! Both I’d give a 3/5, adequate dragonflies

ORTHOPTERA: you get a cricket AND two different styles of grasshopper! The big, detailed black and red cricket is crudely painted but very unique, 3.5/5. The small grasshopper is cute and inoffensive, barely painted, 3/5. The large grasshopper is a 4/5 for me because while I’ve seen plenty like it, it has a really nice gradient from lime green to a darker grassier green that I just find very pleasant.

BEES: two very differently sculpted bees, and they both use a sparkly metallic gold with black stripes. Both deserve a 4/5.

ANTS: collectively I’m gonna say these are a 3.5/5, on their own very plain but I like that together you have a dull yellow-tan ant with comical googly eyes and a bigger, more ominous shiny black ant with spooky red eyes. I like that the black ant is also tied with a couple others as the largest bug in the set. It’s actually only slightly larger than the real life Giant Amazonian ant, Dinoponera, which is also entirely black.

MANTIDS: excellent choice for another double bug, I like the simple cheapness of the little one with its awkwardly sculpted forelegs but to fair it’s a 2/5 compared to the 4/5 of the larger, red-eyed mantis which has more of that “sparkly” paint style!

SCORPIONS: the only other arachnids in the set, and it’s amazing they included two different scorpions but only one spider. Trust me when I say that’s the most radical maverick decision a rubber bug set has ever made in the history of mankind. The small red scorpion is alright, a 3 I guess. The larger one has only six legs which is not accurate (the claws of a scorpion are modified mouthparts, not legs!) but I can’t look at its little black eyes and not want to cry so 5/5 actually.

CICADA: not terribly common in these! Charming, chunky brown cicada, though the thorax piece is so transparent you can always see the hole it plugs into. At one time, this sculpt may have been part of a higher quality set that actually painted over this design flaw. 4/5 regardless.

FLY: there’s a pattern here in which almost every flying insect in the set has a gold-brown base, which I’m not a big fan of. Sadly I’m overall neutral on this fly, normally my favorite of all the basic insects, perhaps because it looks just as much like some sort of wasp. It’s definitely a fly due to having only one pair of wings, and plenty of flies look exactly like this, but I’d just be a bigger fan if it was a chunkier, larger-eyed blowfly or horsefly. 2.5/5

UNKNOWN: there are actually several insects this could possibly represent including a few Lepidoptera and Hymenoptera, but the one insect it most closely resembles is an adult caddisfly. I like it, but it’s difficult to fairly judge it with no certain identification so 3/5 has to do.

HAWKMOTH: stellar choice! I’ve seen only one cheap-grade plastic hawkmoth in my whole life, actually! Several hawkmoths are even clear-winged, though those usually still have dark markings around the wing edges. Would’ve been more accurate to some real species if they just cast the wings in a solid color, but that’s a trivial criticism. 5/5

WASP: the wasp is SO good. The paint on this one is skewed funny but that’s fine, the green of the abdomen pops really well and I love the grouchy red eyes. 5/5

CATERPILLAR: larvae are so rarely included in these, and when they are, they’re often an incredibly plain segmented tube that doesn’t look like anything in particular, or a recolor of a generic caterpillar I’ve seen several times before. This caterpillar sculpt is actually new to me and nicely shaped, with a tapering body and accurate limbs. It is however a rather stiff hunk of plastic, not as rubbery as the others, and honestly this is the one you would want rubberiest! Still a 5/5 for its inclusion at all.

BEETLE: beetles are the most abundant, diverse insect group and the most common rubber bug toy after spiders, so it’s another bold move that they include only one in this whole set and it isn’t even one of the more recognizable, more famous beetles. On its own merits as just a rubber beetle it’s a 3/5, but its metallic blue stands out so nicely in this set, and the sculpt appears to be some sort of blister beetle, a rare choice and a very cool (but dangerous! Don’t touch them!!!) insect group so 5/5

MOSQUITO: mosquitoes are another of my favorite animal groups, and as one of the world’s most abundant, most recognized, most controversial insects you’d think they’d be a standard bug toy already, but this is only the third plastic mosquito design I’ve ever seen in my entire long life! It’s brown, unpainted, dinky and bent funny. 10/5

[saturn-sends-hugs]

ok, this has been burning a hole in my notes app and i’m just gonna send it out there:

Why (i think) the Finale was Like That:

to preface, if you liked the finale, good for you!! that’s totally valid and i’m not trying to bash that. but i know a lot of people were left wanting more, and i’m one of them. anyway, to my point:

as silly as it sounds, this show is not written for us.

we’re fans. the producers already know we’re gonna watch the show. they don’t need to convince us to give them our attention, they already have it. why waste time digging into random side characters in the larger Star Wars saga when the average person doesn’t even know who that is?

their real job is to convince outsiders to watch. to get hooked. to see an element they like, probably from the main movies, and tune in, even for one episode. if they can get them hooked with fennec or ventress or hell even rex, that’s a win for them.

the plot lines wrap up in such an unsatisfying way because honestly? they cant waste time focusing more on these characters than they have to. the people writing and designing the show might love them and want to include more meaningful resolutions, but that takes too long and costs too much money. you know what’s cheaper and will satisfy the average viewer? kill the mystery clones, cut off the “trauma hand”, and wrap it all up in a nice little “look, she’s joining the rebellion, guys!” moment because the more bland and broad the ending, the more people will understand it.

i mean, remember the Fives mention? Echo didn’t react, he didn’t even stutter, he literally moved the conversation along like they were talking about where to go for dinner like HELLO. we already know they cannot be bothered to show real important emotional scenes because that would take too much spotlight away from the whole star wars politics plot or whatever were supposed to care about. (honestly, who is watching bad batch for the og trilogy implications? woah tarkin and a couple other empire dudes are talking about project stardust definitely gimme more of that and not any meaningful connection between these characters i love)

it’s scummy, it sucks, it especially kills me that the story is basically lost to corporate greed but let’s be honest, this is Disney’s Star Wars. i could literally just leave it there. meaningful moments will always be sacrificed for shock value and character cameos because the random guy seeing an ad is only gonna watch the show if he thinks “oh cool, tarkin, i didn’t know he was in that show, maybe i should see what that’s about.”

and yes, i know, there absolutely is a ton of love and care poured into this show. i appreciate the effort that went into it. i’m just sad they didn’t have full creative freedom under Disney to give us the story we wanted.

but you know who won’t sacrifice story for money? you know who’s guaranteed to have the fans’ interests in mind? you know who does have full creative freedom and is equally pissed about bad show moments and want to do them better? FANFIC AUTHORS. Fan artists, theorists, even roleplay accounts and every other type of dedicated fandom blog is here for that shit and will reshape things however they want a million different ways because that’s the point. the show simply cannot give us what we want, but we can make it ourselves.

your support, your creativity, and your determination to give these characters what they deserve is how we can solve the problem.

i didn’t really mean to turn all “we’re all in this together” here lol but yknow what i really do mean that. i think supporting the community around you is the best option we have for truly enjoying all of this show’s potential.

tagging a few people cause i value your input!! and let’s be honest i’m probably leaving a few things out that you might be able to expand on: @the-bi-space-ace @inkstainedhandswithrings @phantom-of-the-501st

[gwydionmisha]

‘80′s Goths (aka Trad Goths)

A thing I wrote about '80's Goth style in response to a comment from an obviously younger person commenting on the '80's make up video from the previous aggregate.

Early Goth basically grew out of Punk with a lot of metal and some new wave thrown in.  Goth had no sub-genres yet because those didn't develop until some point in the '90's.  It was all just Goth.  You can see the cross pollination in the music of the period.  Sisters of Mercy is as quintessentially as '80's Goth as it gets, and you can hear how heavy their sound is compared to the also very Goth Smiths at the other end of the sound spectrum.  Goths of my era listened to an eclectic mix of stuff.  It was totally reasonable to be a Goth and also like Metallica (Metal), and classic Punk and poppier new wave influenced things like Depeche Mode.

Glam hadn't really been a thing since we were kids.  Bowie wasn't Glam himself by the time Goth was happening, remember, though some of us DID look back stylistically to his Ziggy Stardust Era which you can see in the corsets and make up choices, but you can also see a lot of new wave in hair and make up mixed in with the original punk and some metal influence.  Clothing was often where punk and metal really mixed.  

My first Mohawk was black, but my second in early '89 was a dark purple.  Goths were allowed to have whatever hair.  Not everyone could afford hair dye in the era before the brighter cheaper colours came in.  Again, it's a matter of what you could afford and what you had access to.  I saved up to get mine done professionally, but we were in the era of bleach and Koolaid options as well as people repurposing DIY hair products.  If you had dark hair, you could get bright orange with Sun In for example.  Yes, black was most common and you actually could buy black Clairol or the like, which made it the most popular option, but most popular doesn't mean only option.

You can't really separate the 80's Goth Look from the '80's Goth Music because the two things were so intertwined and so much what early Goth was as a culture.

Something it is super hard to make people who didn't start dressing this way until after commodification really grasp is just how DIY early Goth was.  You couldn't just go to a store and buy Goth clothes and jewelry at first.  By the end of the decade you could buy an ankh necklace because of things like sandman, but most of the jewelry was handmade by the people wearing it or other Goths, selling it, often on blankets while they made more, or it was vintage stuff that had be repurposed, bought from second hand stores or raided from older relatives.  Building a goth wardrobe was exhausting and time consuming and often involved patience.

Finding clothes was an endless round of scavenger hunting and DIY and repurposing.  Most of us were very poor and again, nothing was made for us except a few things other impoverished Goths made at the end of the decade.  Basically, think etsy only without the internet, so consignment stores and craft fairs and little pop up carts next to those people selling their jewelry on blankets and really that's more an early '90's thing.

We would scouer second hand shops.  Luckily places like Good Will were not as picked over then.  We looked through old boxes of elder relative's clothes.  We learned to do it yourself dye things that were a good cut but the wrong color.  We used to make things or repurpose things or patch things together out of multiple pieces and maybe some netting.  We learned to add trims and frills if we were into that.  We bodged things together with safety pins like the punks we grew out of.  We made do.

Yes really, some people had things with glittery fabrics some times or beading or lace or sequins.  It depended entirely on your taste and what you could find or knew how to make.  Some of the nuance is lost in the photos because this was an era of Polaroids and film photography and some stuff aged better than others.

There was no uniform.  No one true style.  No mass production.  Everything was individual.  I can not describe '80's goth in terms of strict criteria because that criteria didn't exist.  It should NOT exist now.  We knew Goth when we saw or heard it.  That was enough.

I think this is why so many of us Elder Goths go ballistic when someone starts trying to police or gate keep Goth.  (Except for literal NAZIs who can fuck right off.  We don't want them, whatever they are calling themselves that decade.  It's the same thing as the Punk community self-policeing over that).  Anything else? It's like Gender: you are Goth if you say you are Goth.  Work out your own version of what that means.  

So yes, purple hair in the late '80's is historically accurate.  Yes, you could have things like a glittery or sequined or beaded shirt or sweater or dress for those who wore dresses or skirts.  (Some Goth clothing was gendered; some was super androgynous.  A lot of '80's and '90's goths were some brand of queer, gender-nonconforming, trans, and or what we'd now call non-binary, but back then we mostly called ourselves androgynous.  Some cis men wore skirts because they liked how they looked or found them comfortable.  A lot of them switched to kilts later on, but not always.  In the late '80's-early '90's Goth culture was full of people playing with gender expression for a host of reasons).  

There was a mainstream trend for fancy tights and pantyhose with designs or glitter or different colours in them.  Goths could actually find black pantyhose and tights and fishnets at a reasonable price in mainstream stores.  Some of the panty hose had cute little patterns on them, usually at the ankles or up the back, but also all over sometimes.  some were glittery or extra shiny.  It was fine!  It was the same with lace and fishnet and long satin elbow gloves mostly thanks to Madonna.  This is why you see old trad goths wearing these types of accessories.  You could afford them!  You didn't have to hand make them!  The bead and cross and rosary thing was because you could buy those cheap at stores because mainstream people also wore them.   Thanks to people like Cyndi Lauper and Madonna creating a mainstream market for accessories we could use too.

Our subculture hasn't been properly captured in media it's easy to access.  Most of Goths in movie or TV in the '80's and early '90's were stereotypes made or chosen by people who weren't goth either to demonize us as part of a moral panic or as a punchline or a freak show.  The fair representation is in the photographs taken of goths by goths at the time and in the memories of Elder Goths like me.

Trust me, the Karolina Żebrowska makeover looks just fine to me, within the range of what people were wearing then.  She could have walked into a club or a house party and fit right the fuck in.  Looking at her made me a little nostalgic for the scent of clove cigarettes even though I'm allergic.  She did just fine.

[rohirric-hunter]

so i just came across your post about not taking heist movies seriously since getting a job as a security guard, and the timestamp isnt loading so i have no idea how long ago it was and im sure you've been asked this before so sorry in advance but. im curious. why would bribing a security guard definitely not work?

That post was a very long time ago lol. It's interesting to look back on now that I don't work as a security guard anymore. I miss the job very much, but unfortunately all the companies in my area were bought out by Allied Universal, which is a bad company that treats its employees badly and offers poor security services to boot, so it's not a job that's available to me anymore.

The thing about being a security guard is it's literally the easiest job in the world. The entire job is: show up, wear a uniform, be awake. Occasionally open a door. (One or more of these items may be optional, depending on the specific job.) And for introverts and young professionals who get into it out of retail, it's heaven because you don't generally have to talk to people unless you have specific tangible business with them. And you get yelled at a lot less than in retail. And when you do get yelled at the correct response is not to immediately roll over like in retail but to stand your ground and calmly make them understand that they're not helping their case (which is AMAZING for your mental health). It's also something you can basically stay in forever. Many of the people I worked with were older, in their 60s or later, not because they couldn't afford to retire but because they didn't want to give up the structure of having a job. It has few to no physical requirements and the few requirements it does have, like patrolling, are offset by hours of downtime in most shifts.

It pays well, too. I made a comfortable living wage with plenty of money for spending and saving starting, and that was on the lower end of the pay scale; it only goes up from there. In my area basically the only jobs that pay more are things like garbage collector and bartender -- both of whom have a very high barrier of entry and are MUCH harder.

Basically, it's the best job in the world. Not for everyone, but for people who gravitate towards it and tend to stay. If you don't think it's the best job in the world then you think it's the worst job in the world and you'll either leave or get fired before too long.

And if you accept a bribe? For any reason? You're out. You're blacklisted. You'll never work security again. Ever. So somebody offers you $20k. That's a lot of money. That's a pretty hefty amount. But it'll run out eventually. And when it does, how are you gonna get more money? Retail? As if. Bartending? Only if you spent a hefty chunk of that $20k on school. 100k? Not gonna last forever. 500k? Maybe if I had a head for investing but at this point people are gonna start asking where the money came from and presumably you wanted to spend it on something other than moving away and changing your name.

I just. Can't comprehend an amount of money that would make me or anyone with sense give up the ability to have that kind of job. It would have to be enough to live comfortably for the rest of your life without working, at a very high standard of living. Plus enough to cover legal fees, because accepting the bribe would definitely get you sued and quite possibly arrested. Somewhere in the multiple millions I would assume. And if you have that much money to spend on bribing a security guard then there are probably cheaper ways to do whatever you're after.

(Maybe if you were lucky you could find a security guard in like crippling medical debt or something but to be quite honest I wouldn't accept a bribe from a stranger who knew that about me either so you would legitimately just have to get lucky. And once again, if you have that much money you presumably have better things to be doing than bribing security guards.)

[khaleesiofalicante]

D I need help

Ok so basically I have this friend we've been friends since we were 4 n we're really close n I love her to death and she's really been struggling lately with college, family n finance and I've been trying my best to support her n be there for her but there's not much I can do other than like offer my support n listen. She's been really really anxious and depressed like to the point where it's affecting her physically making her sick (she got sick a lot before too but now it's more frequent and long) , miss a lot of classes cuz of which she got really low scores this semester which only caused her to feel worse. She has a lotta pressure from her family to focus on her studies n do well so she can earn cuz they're struggling financially n her dad's an alcoholic her mom's supportive tho but still the pressures on cuz they can barely pay for college she's being sponsored by her uncle which she's grateful for but it just adds to the pressure

Anyways she told me today that she wants to quit college to work on her mental health but tbh Idk if that's gonna work out cuz staying at home with her dad the way he is n their financial issues is only going to make things worse and it's her first year of college if she drops out rn it may not be a good decision that being said ik at the end of the day it's her decision n her life but I have no idea what to say to her

Hey there,

First off, you're doing an amazing job being there for your friend. It's clear how much you care about her.

It sounds like your friend is shouldering quite a bit right now. It's heartbreaking to hear that her struggles are taking a toll on her physically and mentally too. That's a sign things are really weighing on her.

If that's the case, then taking a break is not entirely a bad idea.

Perhaps instead of telling her not to do it, you could help her think a little about what she wants to do instead?

Would finding some employment in the meantime help? Does she want to go away and stay with a friend/relative for a while? Does she want to pursue online courses which are cheaper and more convenient? Which of these options are feasible and desirable to her?

Personally speaking, I've been in the situation you're friend is in. And no matter how much you want her to continue, sometimes it's just not possible. I'm honestly proud of her for saying she wants a break. That takes strength.

Both my sisters stopped their degrees halfway through for more or less the same reasons, and guess what, one of them went back and completed it later, and the other eventually ended up with a job that she loved and excelled in.

I know it seems scary to drop out of college/school and worry about how that might impact one's future. But right now, her health is the most important thing. Her present is the problem, not her future. Besides, like I said, there are so many options right now. So, let her choose something a little less difficult.

At the end of the day, you're right. It's her call. All you can do is keep being the amazing friend you are—supportive, understanding, and there to listen. Let her know you've got her back no matter what.

Sending love and courage to you and your friend ❤️

[babsaros]

gc2b vs underworks binder

ok gonna do a review of the binder i just got from Underworks, comparing it to the binder i got from gc2b in 2021. bear with me, as I don’t normally do this sort of posting. I did my best to get passable pictures without a proper set-up, but at least I cleaned my room, okay? Post gets long, esp with pictures, so popping it under a read more!

For the most part, I think the fit of my gc2b binder is pretty good! I get pretty good compression from it, and it’s almost the perfect length. However, for a racerback, it isn’t very narrow in the back, and covers the bottom of my shoulder blades which does feel kinda weird sometimes. My biggest issue is that the arms are too high and ride up, pinching my skin pretty bad. I have to adjust it pretty frequently, and trying to pull it down underneath other layers of clothing is difficult and awkward, esp trying to do so stealthily. I started poking around looking for alternate options after hearing GC2Bs quality had fallen in past years and were generally not recommended anymore. I plan on ordering from Shapeshifters, but I ordered this Underworks binder in the meantime because the price was much cheaper. There were no reviews for the binder I ordered at the time, but I was fine taking the risk for the price. Now, after trying it on, it seems prudent that I do review mine! Putting the specific info and links to each binder here as well: GC2B binder: Size Medium, Racerback collection Underworks binder: Size Small, “Firm Compression Racerback Chest Binder and Minimizer” First, I’ll show my chest uncompressed, just wearing a medium tomboyx cotton bra:

for the record: I have a pretty small chest! I haven’t bought a bra in years, but I was a b-cup last I checked. I also know I have a smaller body in general than a lot of people, so there’s the grain of salt when considering fit, though I do think that makes it easier to judge the compression factor.  Here’s the GC2B binder (I roll up the bottom about an inch so it sits flatter):

You can see the racerback is actually pretty wide, and how tight it is around my underarms. (pretend you don’t notice the deodorant stains though ok thx)

AND here’s the “firm compression” binder from Underworks:

Wearing it pulled down all the way, the neckline and arms are so low that I feel I get basically no compression, despite it still being a struggle to pull on. The racerback is actually narrow enough to free my shoulder blades though.

If I pull it up higher, I get slightly more compression, though still only maybe as much as just wearing a sports bra, but now with a bunch of loose fabric at the top.  The pictures shown on the Underworks page definitely make it seem like it'll compress a lot more, so all-in-all a little disappointing, but again i was fine taking the risk because the price was a lot cheaper than other options. The "Extreme MagiCotton Sports and Binding Bra" has a ton more reviews, where people call it a binder and say it's great, so maybe despite the name that one has more compression than the "Firm Compression Binder"? I'll also admit that I really prefer the racerback style and that was a big factor in which one I chose to order. Underworks obviously has a lot of other options, and I'm curious about the differences in material between them all. Looking at the labels sewn in, both binders are nylon/spandex, but my gc2b binder has an additional front panel made from cotton/polyester that feels more like canvas and doesn't stretch at all. It's hard to judge from pictures, but I'm not sure any of the binder options of Underworks have a second front panel like that? I should also say that I did email GC2B a couple months ago asking about their opinion of the fit issues I had, and was told that sizing up to a large might be an option. I'm not sure I'll try that or order from them again, though. I'm also not sure sizing down the Underworks binder to an XS is a good option either, because the size S is already tight enough to pull on, it just doesn't seem to have full compression capability. Anyway! I'm hoping to order from Shapeshifters once I feel confident enough to invest the money, so I'll still poke around in the meantime. I've heard complaints about binders falling apart, but aside from some threads fraying on the bottom hem, my GC2B binder is holding up pretty well, especially considering I'm too lazy to follow the hand-wash instructions and just throw it in the washer and dryer. I'll at least say that the Underworks binder is lightweight and has way more freedom of movement, so it's at least a good lazy day option maybe, though I'd probably just end up skipping it and wearing something baggy anyway. Well. hope this helps anyone else looking into ordering one, since i know i reblogged a post recommending Underworks a little while ago and that's what made me order one at all. thx for reading if u made it this far, and good luck to anyone else searching for the perfect binder!

[pureheroine2013]

hiiii I am hopefully going to ireland next month!! I would love recommendations for what to see and do :)

HELLO I love this ask thank you… I will tell you all my favourite spots in Dublin:

First of all: Dublin has SO much public seating space all around but especially along the river, so keep that in mind

St. Stephen’s Green is a large park on walking distance from the river, lots of benches and you’re allowed to sit in the grass so nice for hanging out and reading your book etc

Panem is the name of a cafe/bakery alongside the river where they serve lovely breakfasts and brunch options, they have pancakes and a full Irish breakfast

You can listen to traditional Irish music played by local enthusiasts in the pub called the Cobblestone, its very very cute and welcoming, not very touristy and a pint of Guinness is only €5,80 which is way cheaper than you would get in temple bar area!

I didn’t go there myself but I’ve heard that there are deer you can pet in Phoenix Park

The Guinness Storehouse is only really worth it if you go with friends/people to hang out with, it’s interesting but it’s basically one big Guinness advertisement so don’t expect toooo much of it. The ‘gravity bar’ has an amazing view of the city though so that’s worth doing it for if it fits your budget

The national gallery of Ireland is free to visit and has the most wonderful MASSIVE collection of art! I recommend it 100000% if you like art, take some time for it as well since it’s bigger than you might expect

If you’re planning on using public transit I recommend getting a leap visitor card, you can get one for either 1, 3 or 7 days I believe and after purchase you can use some trains, most busses and trams without extra charge

If you like doing hikes or seeing nature, take the train to Howth (also possible w the leap visitor card!). It’s a fishing town on the coast and there are 3 different hikes you can do along the coast; I personally did the shortest one and it was very doable and the views were SO incredibly beautiful I wholeheartedly recommend it! And even if you don’t want to do a hike, Howth is still a very beautiful town and worth a visit :^)

I found the tour of the book of Kells and the old library of Trinity very impressive, but keep in mind that most of the library is currently empty due to preservation. I didn’t know before I went and I was kind of disappointed, though it was still very cool to see. I also very much recommend walking around the Trinity college campus as its soooooo beautiful

There are a bunch of free, tip based walking tours so I would Google those if you’re interested in learning about the history

Central brew coffee is a very nice cafe with a lot of breakfast/lunch options, I went there very often<3

There’s a Brooklyn-style pizza place slash pub along the river called r.i.o.t., it’s a bit alternative with DELICIOUS food, super nice people working there and live music so I had an amazing evening there

Books upstairs is the name of my favourite bookstore in the WORLD, it’s so adorable and they have an amazing selection of books + very very very cute tote bags :^) they also have a café above the bookstore which is a very cute place to enjoy some coffee and cake and read your little books

Sorry this is like an essay but I hope this helps you a bit!!!!! Let me know if you went to any of these places and what you thought of them :^) if you have any other questions feel free to send another ask or dm me!!! xxxx

[nameless-brand]

Aren't hostile takeovers illegal?

A hostile takeover in of itself is perfectly legal. The tactics employed to make it succeed on the other hand...

The basic definition of a hostile takeover is that an outside party has taken over a target company without the consent or approval of the target company's board of directors. The natural opposite of a hostile takeover is a friendly takeover where the board of directors approves the acquisition.

There's three main ways to perform a hostile takeover - with some variances depending on a company's by-laws and provisions.

The first is a tender offer where you offer to buy shareholder stock at a premium (more than it's worth) until you become the majority shareholder (>51% of the shares) and can approve of the takeover directly or just oust the board of directors yourself and install your own ( the second option, while cleaner, is more difficult than you'd think for reasons I'll explain later).

The second is a proxy vote where you collude with other shareholders that have voting rights to gain a sorta pseudo-majority stakeholder status to directly approve of a merger or vote to oust members of the board of directors that oppose a merger and install members that will approve it.

The third is to just buy shares of the publicly-traded company in the open market. This is often cheaper than a tender offer since you won't be buying at premium. But at the same time, the SEC requires an acquiring company to report if they own 10% of a target company's shares, so you usually lose the element of surprise if you did things normally.

I more or less made my move during a time where the Jerome Management Company was in that awkward period between becoming a small-scale company and a large-scale company. Essentially, the board of directors opened up their company to public trade which diluted out their personal voting power (as a significant number of shares are added to the share pool) at the benefit of getting an enormous amount of public investment from the public buying those shares.

I employed the third option for hostile takeover through the usage of companies not quite affiliated with the Nameless company. Frank's Sec-Corp which provides security to my places is one example. I also indirectly invested in a hotel chain through preferential transport and supplying of goods in another. These companies were willing to help me so long as I repaid them back naturally. Others were just shell companies, which I ended up not really needing in the first place. Always kept to buying shares within the 9% with all these shell companies. I had around 42% when I made my tender offer, the first option - and offered to buy shares at 25% more.

Naturally, the shell company and allied companies' shares were "bought" by me. And many other shareholders took my offer, mostly because they didn't trust the board of directors and management overall. I mean, who demolishes an orphanage and tries to build in a mall in the proverbial Crime Alley out of all places? My charge could probably tell that would fail badly.

And there were other questionable management decisions including raising rents so high in the apartments they did own that no one wants to stay in them - Jerome Apartments have an exceptionally poor retention rate for poor management, over pricing, and a whole slew of maintenance issues.

Anyway when I struck with the tender offer, I managed to get over 65% of the shares, which is good. And with help from my legal and accounting teams, we started making sure the company by-laws couldn't be modified during my takeover.

---

There are certain ways to make a hostile takeover much harder to do. They either involve decreasing the value of the company itself or increasing the cost to acquire the company.

Crown jewel defense, where a company sells its most prized asset to a friendly company only to rebuy it when the threat of a hostile takeover ends, is one way to dissuade a hostile takeover. According to my research, during the hostile takeover of the back-then Wayne Industries over a decade ago, the company threatened to sell WayneTech to stall out a hostile takeover.

Poison-pill strategy is a defense where through a provision if a shareholder gains a certain percentage of stock, the company will issue shares at a discounted price or even for free to any shareholder except the one who triggered the provision. This was actually the threat Twitter made when Elon Musk announced he had 9% of Twitter's stock.

The advantage of a poison-pill strategy is as follows: if I own 51 shares and the total shares in the company are 100, I am majority shareholder. However, if you poison-pilled out 100 more shares to other shareholders, I no longer have majority shareholder status because it's now 51/200. But the poison part comes in because by increasing the number of shares, you've effectively reduced your stock's worth - and in my example, that would be by half - which also counts as decreasing the company's market value in the short term. That would've been Twitter's strategy had Musk hit 15% of shares owned, had they not agreed in the end to a buyout. In this case, the Jerome Management Company did not have such a provision in place though, probably because they didn't expect to be targeted like this - but no mistake, had I given them time to realize what I'm doing, this definitely would've been employed.

Currently, I'm dealing with their golden parachute defense, where if key management is dismissed after a merger, they are entitled to a very large benefits package into order of tens of millions dollars (increasing the cost of the unwanted merger). I'm dealing with this by borrowing the heavy stick of the law; none of these people are clean as you'd expect from people willing to overprice rent or demolish orphanages for the sake of profits. Many of these people are utilizing the property management company as a means to write off personal/home expenses as business tax deductions - ones that aren't legal to do such as a personal chef, flights to their vacation home, etc. So I intend to get them to resign on their own, because the alternative is that I get the IRS after them with hard evidence in my possession - since no one in their thick as thieves group expected my hostile takeover. Ha.

I probably should watch my back for the next couple of weeks - like I said, they aren't clean. Luckily for me, everyone still thinks I'm somewhere in NJ at the Retirement Mansion instead of the Inn.

[lets-try-cooking-this]

Keep it (Kinda) Simple Garlic Pasta

Everyone knows the staple "college foods".

Basically anything and everything simple: pastas, ramen (or ramyeon depending on what brand you get), pizzas, ready-made meals, sandwiches, the works. If it can't be thrown in a microwave or easily made then its a no-go.

Jennifer Bui, College Food Pyramid

Well, unfortunately for me and those probably like me, that's not so simple. Due to some health problems, the foods I get have to either have to be insanely specific or have to be relatively fresh. So I can't rely so heavily on the keep it simple meals that so many college kids eat. So nothing that can just be tossed into the oven or put into a drawer that can last for a few months (with maybe the exception of pasta).

Last year, when I was diagnosed with IBS, I knew that my options were going to be more limited and more expensive. If I wanted to use butter in recipes, I was better off getting the avocado butter than the cheaper kind. Pasta (which I have yet to find a gluten-free alternative for that I actually like) had to be treated as something to make more on the weekend so I can deal with it at my dorm. Ice cream in general was a no go.

To put it simply, it sucked.

So I started trying making my own recipes using ones I already knew. If I wanted to make pasta with a type of meat sauce, it wasn't going to be simple; I was going to add garlic, onion, a bunch of spices, mushroom and spinach (for the fiber). Instead of using normal lettuce for sandwiches, I just used spinach. Burgers were to be kept more vegetarian if I could help it. Potatoes were made with avocado butter and a bunch of spices. You get the idea.

During this time, I was also teaching my roommate how to cook. I was showing her the basics, what spices go together and how to make sure she didn't accidently poison herself.

One day, she asked me what she could make out of pasta. I blinked at her as if she had grown a couple of extra heads and said, "Uhh... literally anything? You can toss it in sauce, butter, a sort of pesto, it doesn't matter."

Well she told me she didn't want any of that. We ate pasta with sauce a lot, we don't necessarily have pesto just lying around and butter was too boring.

I told her it didn't have to be so simple, the easiest thing to incorporate with other things would be the butter. So I told her to saute some onion and garlic in the pan with butter while cooking the pasta and then toss it all together with spices.

Needless to say she slow blinked at me and I had to walk her through how to make it.

Eventually, it was done cooking and she had the garlic butter pasta for the first time and... she really enjoyed it. She really liked the garlic and it wasn't boring like she was expecting it to be.

This recipe is essentially how I taught her to make it, only with more vegetables to give it some variety.

Recipe:

Ingredients

1 box of spaghetti

butter (I use avocado butter as an alternative, olive oil butter is also good)

3-5 cloves of garlic, minced (I added 6 but that's just because I love it)

1 small yellow onion, thinly sliced

1 grated carrot (you can also use match sticks)

4 oz of white mushrooms

1 small bag of frozen broccoli

1 tablespoon of olive oil

salt

pepper

garlic powder

onion powder

basil

crushed red pepper

*NOTE: I did not include measurements to the seasoning nor did I do it to the butter because I feel its to ones preference how much they add in this dish. I added the seasoning pretty liberally but that's purely because I prefer to be slightly more heavy handed in seasoning because that's how I like it. You do not need to do this. Add however much of one thing or another as you like. My only precaution is to not completely coat everything in seasoning, since that will overwhelm the dish. Roughly 1 teaspoon of each seasoning with each new vegetable added may be more than enough for some of you.

Directions

Boil your water for your pasta and add a tablespoon of olive oil in the water to prevent the pasta from sticking and salt to the water before adding the pasta. Cook that per package instructions.

While waiting for the water to boil, prep your vegetables.

In a saute pan on medium heat, add butter then slowly add your vegetables, starting with your onion and garlic. Add a dash of salt, pepper, garlic powder, onion powder and basil to your pan and toss together.

*important note: if you feel you need to add more butter to this dish, feel free to do it. I added butter with the addition of every new vegetable added to the saute pan. I used roughly 6-7 spoonfuls of butter in this, but that's because I added roughly a spoonful for every addition to the pan and wanted to make sure it was buttery and delicious.

4.After 1 minute, add your carrot and mushroom to your saute pan and add another dash of the spices mentioned above.

5.Add your broccoli to your pan, adding one more dash of garlic powder and onion powder.

6. When the pasta is finished cooking, drain the pasta and slowly start adding it to the pan, making sure to coat the pasta with the butter and vegetables each time.

7. Add 1 1/2 teaspoons of basil and red pepper flake. Serve immediately.

That's it! This dish is incredibly simple to make and tastes delicious. This can be served with chicken, beef, or just by itself for something simple and flavorful to eat. Plus, because this recipe could realistically feed four people, its perfect to save in the fridge for the few days and eat more later. And try adding your own favorite vegetables into it to see what combinations you like and let me know your favorites too!



[fayedouglas]

The Necromancer

No one really prepares you for funeral planning. After my dad passed, suddenly I had to think about flower arrangements and catering and the wake and the funeral, and I wasn't even sure I could afford any of it. I was just out of college in a dead-end data entry position, punching in numbers at a time of night the sun didn’t dare touch, eating white rice with half frozen peas in, and doing nothing with my degree. I was not in a position to deal with his passing, monetarily or emotionally.

My mom died years ago and my grandmother dealt with the whole affair, keeping me and my dad’s “grubby hands” away from her perfect girl. She’s not around anymore. Thank god. But, with her gone, I was running out of options for the funeral.

Now, I’ve always listened to my dad when he told me to “stay the fuck away from that creepy voodoo shit.” He always said that black magicians were a bunch of frauds after a quick dime, but necromancy just seemed cheaper. The guy didn’t even want that much money; he was certainly asking less than any funeral home was. Even if he was really a hack, the chance to see dad again, alive and breathing, well, it wasn’t really a choice.

The necromancer told me that the sacrifice of my father’s favorite things was necessary to keep his soul tied to the mortal plane. Artifacts is the word he actually chose. As though fancy words made basically pawning my dad’s stuff any better. I protested at first, who wouldn’t? I was beginning to think my dad was right, and I told him that as I turned to leave.

“Did you know,” he began, soft words cutting through the tense air in the room, “that the souls of the happily deceased have a very limited time before they move on forever?” A grin stretched across his face, “And I have it on good authority that your father was quite the happy soul.”

I don’t clearly remember the rest of the conversation. His words bounced around my head. This was my last chance. My only chance. I never really had any other choice. I vaguely recall shaking his hand, it was clammy and feverish. Guiding me out the door, he said it was what my dad would have wanted.

I didn’t cry after my dad died. And, as long as the necromancer’s spell held, I would never need to. I nearly broke that oath when the necromancer brought dad home for the first time. He was, understandably, confused and more than a little angry with me. Even pinned under his pointed gaze as he lectured me, I couldn’t stop myself from laughing. It’d been so long since I’d seen my dad like this. I didn’t think I’d ever miss being yelled at, but there’s a lot we don’t anticipate missing. After all, sometimes I still miss my mother.

The sacrifices start slowly, according to the necromancer. It still seems like a lot. Once a week I give one of my dad’s things to the necromancer. Just my dad’s favorite shirt, or one of his paintings. Anything that he had attachment to.

Dad loved painting. It was practically all he lived for, so I have a few to spare. My mother always thought he was wasting his life away, and bemoaned marrying a starving artist. I vehemently disagree. His paintings have this ecstatic, vibrant energy to them, a piece of his own heart stitched into the very canvas. Not literally, of course. That was more of mom’s thing. He never sold any of his paintings. I’d ask him why, and he’d always laugh, say people just didn’t appreciate real art, and change the subject. I know he never tried to sell any paintings though. I don’t think he could bear to part with them. He was kind of a crummy artist, from the whole money standpoint, anyway. Then again, so am I, I’m not even using my bloody degree.

As I hand the necromancer an oil painting from my dad’s twenties, a night sky with bright, stark stars, my dad’s skin, sunken in from barely staved off rot, fills in. His sickly pallor vanishes under warm flushed skin, blood pumping through his veins for another week. A light returns to his eyes, one I hadn’t even noticed was gone.

One sacrifice a week wasn’t enough anymore. Dad kept on spacing out mid sentence, his skin losing all of its color, muscles stiffening in place. He would stay like that until I could find something to sacrifice. I’m running out of paintings. I gave up his library, everything from trashy romance to textbooks. Dad’s degree, now an empty space on the wall. Family photos, gone. Almost everything that my dad had ever touched had been given to the necromancer. With him home, we painted together a lot. I missed painting with my dad, after he passed. Well, it doesn’t matter anymore. I gave away the paint a few days ago.

We’re in the car, sitting in traffic, talking about the weather or something equally mundane when dad cuts off mid sentence. He paws at his throat, a death rattle on his lips, looking at me with panicked eyes. His skin, which had been sickly and sunken the past few days, turns ashy. I pull over, frantic despite having gone through this routine countless times.

“It’s okay dad, we’ll go back to the house and get you fixed up.”

Panicking even harder at my words, Dad forces out a whimpered “no, please,” as he shakes his head. Then he's frozen. He looks almost like a mummy like this. Skin hanging loosely from his frame, eyes bulging, and an expression of fear I’ve never seen my father’s face twisted into. Looking now, it's hard to believe that this thing was ever my dad.

When I get to the necromancer’s door, hand posed to knock, I find myself unable to move. Like my dad had so many times before, I freeze stiff as a board standing on the stoop. The image of my father’s terrified face is burned into my mind. I can’t do this to him anymore. That mummy, that empty husk sitting in my car is not my father. He hadn’t been for a long time. Maybe the person I brought back never was him. Then, I blink, lower my arm, and walk back to my car. On my way home, I cried. What if I ruined whatever was left of him?

I thought I had given away all of the paintings in the house, but I found one last painting hidden under my dad’s bed. It was a self portrait. He hated painting himself, but we had so many paintings of the rest of the family in the house that I had demanded he paint himself. I didn’t think that he actually listened to me.

Part of me wants to rush to the necromancer again, to have a precious few moments with my dad again, but I know that isn’t what he wants. This whole thing was never what he wanted. The tighter I hold him, the more he slips through my fingers.

[frankhightower]

Reminders don’t work

On Sunday, June 4, I will post my last reminder for this commission opening. Quite simply, I’ve run out of ideas for how to organize my “products” logically, and don’t want to just repost the same thing twice because it would feel like spamming. This doesn’t mean I’ll stop taking commissions (I do need the money after all for basic things like groceries) I just won’t be advertising it in this way.

I only sold 1 commission with these reminders and it was when I posted the first one. It is clear that, while the reminders do indeed get the offer in front of more people’s eyes, they don’t get more sales. I saw something similar with the original YCH that spurred the price sheet: after the first week or so, reminders just didn’t do anything.

Was it the algorithm?

Believe it or not, The Algorithm/s has/have been very good with the reminders, averaging 30 views on FA, 519 on DA, and 213 on Twitter (all of them doubling that number for two days… and they were different two days on each platform!) while the original full price sheet got three times as much! I got a total of 20 likes across all platforms and 10 retweets/reblogs (Tumblr doesn’t count views but it does count that!) The numbers are probably similar for platforms that don’t track views.

Did I do it wrong?

With total views in the order of 14,000 (which is astronomical for me!) and likes being one or two thousandths of that (they are normally one or two hundredths), the obvious answer is people literally didn’t like the price sheet. However, the finished Special Passenger YCH exceeded that “normal”, so it’s obviously not the station motif that’s a problem. People just don’t hit “like” on a price sheet as often (yes, I went and looked at other peoples’).

Were the prices too high? This was indirectly tested by the Pokémon offer, which not only is half priced, but half priced with respect to my old prices – in effect, prices are a third of what I’m asking for regular commissions now. Two people asked for Pokémon but it was clear from the beginning it wasn’t going to materialize before the end of the month, when I needed the money.

Did I post at the wrong time? I specifically tried every possible time of day, every possible day of the week, for when to upload the reminders. If there was someone that only logged in, say, Tuesdays at lunch, I got him covered.

Was the price sheet too complicated? That is part of what the reminders tested. Even when reduced to just one or two options, there appeared to be no interest (in buying, that is. Remember they did get likes and retweets and one even got a comment just praising it!)

Was I selling the wrong thing? The only thing the price sheet rules out, really, is headshots, but the purpose of a headshot is to get cheaper art, which I did provide avenues for. I’ve already shown I’m willing to do most “furry specialties”, and I think anyone who has been following me knows it already.

So what did go wrong?

Quite simply, it’s a bad time of year to open commissions. I basically opened on the day of final exams; people simply haven’t been online as much since then. The fact that there’s been not one, not two, but three large conventions since then, doesn’t help: a lot of my would-be customers are also convention-goers, and they will have, of course, spent all their money at the convention!

I also opened right after Mother’s Day (another occasion to spend all your money) and late in the month (people who collect paychecks only at the end of the month will have spent their last one and be waiting on the next one)      

I may also simply not have the followers: while I have 350 on twitter and 211 on FA, 62 on DA, and 21 on tumblr, there is considerable overlap (which, let’s be honest, I encourage). There is probably only 400 followers total among all (haven’t actually counted, but the last time I did, years ago, that was the degree of overlap there was). Marketing theory says that means I can expect an average 4 sales a month. The size drive made 7 sales in one month. If there was only 1 sale in May, the average is maintained.

So what do we do now?

I have often mentioned how I need to do ref sheets for my characters (and failed), and part of the reason is to learn to make refsheets, period.

I’m going to reactivate my “dead” socials (Instagram, Facebook, YouTube) in hopes of reaching people only on those platforms.

I’m going to post the remaining Pokémon. You may have noticed some of the Pokémon sketches in the reminders could not be found anywhere else on Tumblr, that’s because I’d been waiting to make sure they appeared in order.

I need to do more YCHs. I’ve been thinking about this a long time. I have an idea for a pride month YCH I hope to show you soon

I think I need to be clearer about my situation. I’ll be posting more about it from now on.

[nixonnixon36]

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[humeperry]

Fucking my ex's friends and my perfectly planned exploded life

I was in a 7 year relationship with a girl I thought I would spend the rest of my life with. It was my first serious relationship, and I thought I loved this girl more than anyone. More than my mom, more than my grandma, more than anyone. We had lived together the past 3 years, we had 3 cats, an apartment, we talked about getting married, having kids, etc. The rest of my life was planned.

Covid hits and at first, it was a breath of fresh air. At the time, my girlfriend's schedule and mine were completely opposite and the only times we really got to see each other were at night when we went to bed. So, when the world shutdown, we finally got to spend more time with each other. Turns out? Too much time.

We got sick of each other after the first year of Covid. I guess love had blinded me to our personality differences, and I thought that things could work out. My parents had been together since high school, and from first-hand experience I knew that their relationship wasn't perfect, but I figured, like them, we could work things out too. I was willing, she wasn't. I'm more of a homebody type. She was more of a going out type. Don't get me wrong, I like going out, but every night of every weekend? No thanks.

She started hanging with a new group of friends. Friends I will gladly call whores. These girls were complete sorority sluts. From first-hand accounts, I witnessed some seriously slutty behavior. One of her friends was a straight groupie, made out with every DJ or band member at every club they went to. Her "best-friend" literally Dear-John'd her boyfriend, aka she cheated on him while he was deployed overseas. A large majority of her friends had cheated, and her "best friends" had all recently became single due to their slutty behavior. But I digress, just know, this new group of friends were total and complete whores. This is important for later.

When she started hanging out with these friends, I was almost never allowed to go out with them. This should have raised red flags, but I had no reason not to trust her. We had been together for so long, she had never cheated, she loves me, I kept telling myself. It's just a girl's night she'd say. Then she started dressing slutty to go out with these friends while I wasn't allowed to go. Hmmm? I raised the question, how come you don't dress like that when we go out? I do, I do, she'd say, but she didn't. Anyways, this is just me rambling...

A few months later, we got evicted on some bullshit. Corporate was renovating the apartments and your lease is only a month-to-month so we can kick you out with proper notice type bullshit. Basically, our apartment was just trying to raise our rent. They offered us a new apartment in the same complex, but it would be more expensive. The girlfriend and I went out to dinner and discussed what our options were. I asked her if we should sign this new lease or try and find somewhere else cheaper on short notice. We were kind of in a corner, they gave us like a month notice. She agreed we should just sign the lease, so that was that.

Later at dinner, after a few margaritas, my dad texted me. I checked my phone and quickly shot a text back. The girl across the table goes, "Who you texting? Your new girlfriend?"

I said, "What? No, it's my dad."

And she drunkenly replied, "Well, I'll figure out either way, I read your texts every night when you go to sleep anyway."

???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

HUH?

This sent me for a fucking loop. She knew my passcode, I knew hers. I never went through her phone, I didn't really have a reason to. And I didn't care if she went through my phone, I had nothing to hide. But the fact that she said it so matter-of-factly and the fact that she felt the need to go through my phone made me feel gross. She planted the seed in my mind that maybe I needed to look at her phone.

So, later that night, we get home, she passes out drunk. As usual. I look down at her phone and debate whether to go through it or not.

Fuck it. I type in her passcode and go to her messages. I start reading her group chats with her slutty friends and her messages she sent individually to these slutty friends. The first individual thread I come across, her friend asks:

"did u tell hume yet?"

"no not yet. im just gonna get a storage unit and slowly move stuff out and then tell him once its all out."

What the fuck? I scroll up further and keep reading. All her messages were about how unhappy she is and how she wants to move out and not live with me anymore or even be with me. I'm heartbroken. I'm enraged. I lay down next to her and try to go to sleep. I wake up at her alarm and just glare at her. She goes, "What's wrong?"

I said, "When were you going to tell me?"

This fucking bitch chuckled and goes "So you read my messages. We'll talk when I get home from work."

This enraged me even more. She left for work, I had class later that day. I spent the day texting her the worst shit I could think of. "You're a fucking lying snake, you betrayed me, you're a liar, you won't be shit in the real world." Yeah, I know it's fucked up. I'm just being honest here. I was hurt. Destroyed. I had the rest of my life planned out and to see my perfectly planned little life explode in front of me in one little text thread sent me over the fucking edge. I go to class, and I'm there until 10:00 at night. I get home and she's gone, all her shit is gone, everything except the furniture I bought and the cats.

We talk and she says that she loves me still but my mental health issues are just too much for her and that I don't put enough effort into the relationship. She basically said my depression killed our relationship. I know I wasn't a good boyfriend, but she wasn't perfect either despite how she tried to paint everything. Whatever.

The thing is, I wouldn't have been as hurt if she just came out and told me that's what she wanted. That she wanted to break up and move out. The fact that she lied to my face while secretly plotting behind my back to leave just absolutely destroyed me in every single way.

She moves out and leaves me in the apartment we shared that we have to vacate by the end of the month. I go into an even deeper darker depression, I skip school, miss assignments and papers, my professors are emailing me telling me I'm going to fail because I've missed so much. I start drinking and doing a lot of cocaine and weed and pills just trying to forget about the last 7 years of my life. At this point, I've sworn off females. I just wanted to be alone.

The day comes where I have to move out, maybe 3 weeks since she left, and she doesn't show up to help. So, I move out everything on my own. Painstakingly. In the process, I find her old phone. She had gotten a new phone right before we broke up and left her old one here. Huh, I thought. That seed had grown a lot since it was planted so I turned her old phone on and started looking through stuff. I know, fucked up, but I couldn't help it.

In her notes, "Hookup List." A list of people she had fucked since we broke up with a rating out of 10 and everything. Then, her snapchats, she had nudes saved in her memories that were new, she had sent a message to her friend 2 minutes ago that her friend hadn't opened. I looked at the message and it said "lol im in his bed right now." I lost it again. I Gronk-spiked her phone about twenty-times into the faux hardwood and then stomped it another twenty times until it was unrecognizable. I texted her and called her a lying fucking whore and blocked her. I finished moving out, but I was in demon mode.

Immediately, I installed Tinder. She wants to be a whore? I'll go fuck all these girls. I don't give a fuck. I start swiping, I keep swiping. I get some matches. The first few girls I matched with I ended up having sex with. As soon as I would nut, I'd just get pissed off immediately about how I'm supposed to be nutting on my ex, not this whore I just met on Tinder. So, I'd block them and leave. Yes, I know, fucked up. I'm not perfect, I don't pretend to be. I'm just being honest here. This was and still is the darkest period of my life so please withhold judgement.

Then one day on Tinder, I see a picture that has my ex in the photo with a few other girls. What the fuck? I look through the profile and realize it's a girl in my ex's friend group. I swipe right as a joke thinking she would never match with me. But lo and behold, I check Tinder that night and she matched with me.

I'm in Discord with some friends and I'm relaying the news to them. I tell them this girl matched with me and laugh. I jokingly say, "Should I say, 'wanna see why ex was with me for 7 years?'" to my friends and they say YES!

YOLO. I sent it. She sends back an "lol" and "sure." We exchange snapchat information and one thing leads to another. She eventually comes over that weekend and we hangout for a bit. We go out to eat then come back to my apartment. We smoke a joint then fuck. She goes home, I tell her I had a nice time. Surprisingly, I didn't think of my ex during the sex. It was nice.

Until my ex found out. I hadn't talked to my ex since I found her old phone and sent her that nasty message. Soon, I was getting calls from "Unknown." I answer one.

"Hello?"

"HOW COULD YOU? YOU FUCKED T****?"

Click. I hung up.

Another call comes through, same "Unknown." I answer it and immediately start in on my tirade, cutting her off.

"I wanted nothing to do with any women until I saw you immediately started fucking multiple guys as soon as we broke up. And yeah, I did fuck her."

I hung up instantly. I received an email from my ex, since I had her blocked on everything else, saying how hurt she was that I would put effort into taking her friend out and fucking her friend but I didn't put effort into our old relationship.

HUH???? Her idea of effort is taking her to wineries and vineyards and going on pinterest and instagram worthy dates. We went on plenty of those, but when she wanted me to plan something and I'd take us to a gun range, or a MLB or NBA game, it didn't count as effort.

I later found out that she stopped hanging out with her slutty friends after that and doesn't go out at all now.

Honestly? Looking back, I feel really bad about the whole thing. I could've done more in our relationship for sure, but I wasn't the only one at fault. She could have done a lot more. Mostly, I feel bad about fucking her friend. I fucked a girl completely to spite another girl and that's not a good enough reason to have sex with someone in my opinion. I did have a nice time, but my intentions were wrong.

I've since stopped using cocaine and drinking, it was just a little binge. I've also stopped having casual sex with strangers and my ex's friends. I'm trying to get my life back on track and writing shit down like this helps me process things.

The good thing about my perfect little planned life being exploded is now I feel free. I can do whatever the fuck I want. I want.

[gibsonkatz8]

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[rayshippouuchiha]

I read “[Naruto] made budgeting and math his bitch” and all I want to say, to ask, is to consider the possibility that he’s the one in charge of Team 7’s budget? Please and thank you for your time.

It takes Naruto a bit to notice it. Takes a while for all the pieces to line up just right for him to see it.

His team, as talented as they all are, are absolute shit with money.

They're up north, huddled together on the roadside just inside of Tomi, the capital city of the midsized island that makes up Gold Country, when the truth comes out.

Their mission had been long and draining and they're all looking forward to a ship back to the mainland and a stop at an Inn for a night before they start the trek back to Konoha.

The only problem with that plan is the fact that everyone is flat broke.

Everyone, that is, except for Naruto. Which the other three would know if they'd bothered to ask him instead of assuming he was just as broke as they are.

Because Naruto's wallet is basically still as fat as ever despite the length of time they've been gone and the fact that he's done his definition of splurging at the shops in Tomi. He'd put the few hours where they'd split up before meeting again to start looking for a ship back to very very good use.

Supplies were always cheaper for him outside of Konoha proper where the shopkeepers don't know him and he's actually allowed to haggle. Plus their contractor, an ancient silk merchant named Kaede, had taken enough of a liking to Naruto to put in a good word for him at the local shops.

A courtesy that she, apparently, hadn't offered to the rest of the team or maybe just one they hadn't bothered to take her up on. Naruto isn't sure which it is exactly.

But if it's the second option then Naruto's not sure what to think. He'd never turn a discount or chance to haggle down, no matter how small it is. He knows better.

"Well," Kakashi-sensei says brightly. "Looks like we'll be running to the mainland and camping until we're back home. Let that be a lesson to all of us to bring more money next time."

Sakura looks like she's on the verge of either tears or a tantrum and Sasuke looks as blank as always except for the slightly displeased curl of his mouth.

Naruto finds himself a mix of both of their reactions because what?

Bring more money? That was Kakashi-sensei's solution? Just bring more? Like what Naruto knows was in each of their wallets before they left Konoha wasn't a good six months of Naruto's regular budget?

And they've got relatively little to show for the fact that they spent it all?

How??

It's in that moment that the truth hits Naruto directly in the face.

He's the only poor person on this Team. He's the only one of them who has ever had to actually worry about money.

Sakura has parents who actually love and house her, all her mission earnings are pure profit. Kakashi-sensei is probably the shinobi version of rich with his rank and all the high-level missions he's taken. And Sasuke is absolutely the shinobi version of rich with the wealth of an entire Clan at his disposal.

When they run out of money they just ... go get more.

Naruto, with his crumbling apartment and trap-wire thin budget, lives an entirely different kind of life.

They can probably just walk right into the Konoha bank he's sure they all use, the same one Naruto's never been allowed into, and just withdraw more money.

Not Naruto. All of his money, whatever he's scrimped and saved for, has always either been on his person or hidden away in a hollowed space beneath his bed.

For a long moment, Naruto debates with himself. Considers not saying anything and just following along with Kakashi's plan.

But, well, he does have the money and they are his Team.

So ...

"I got this," Naruto huffs out as he holds up his still bulging wallet. "But we're doing it my way and you'd all better pay me back if I spend anything."

He doesn't bother to listen to their protests or whatever they might say or do. Instead he turns on his heel and stalks off towards the docks, intent on finding them a ride to the mainland that doesn't make him want to gouge his eyes out at the price.

Half an hour later finds them settled on the deck of a small fishing vessel, warm pork buns in hand, and Naruto not missing a single yen.

The hoard of shadow clones he has practically crawling over the ship ended up being payment enough for the weathered-looking woman who'd given them passage.

He ignores the way the others stare at him and focuses on eating his lunch, mind already ticking over what Inns he remembers them passing and what he could do to get them a night's stay for the lowest cost possible.

With him in the lead, they manage to make it all the way back to Fire Country without having to pay for much of anything at all. Naruto had bartered everything from his shadow clones to Kakashi-sensei kissing the back of some woman's hand to his own help modeling a kimono while waitressing in his female form at a restaurant in Blouder City for food and lodging.

He'd actually like that last job the most since Tsubame-san had not only let him keep the kimono but he'd made a small fortune in tips as well.

It's not until they stop at the Black River Inn, the last waypoint before they reach Konoha proper, that Naruto finally steps back. Much to the puzzlement of the rest of the team, he lets Kakashi-sensei step up and rent them a room instead.

Tatsuyomi, the man who runs the inn, is the brother-in-law of the woman who runs the Tree Bud in Konoha.

He knows Naruto on sight.

It's not until they're settled into their shared room that night, the others eating a hot meal from the kitchen and Naruto eating the last of meat buns the cook Akira had slipped him before Naruto left the restaurant in Boulder, that someone finally asks.

"How'd you get so good with money, Naruto?" Sakura is the one to break the ice. "Figured you'd blow it all on ramen or something by now."

"He didn't actually pay for much," Sasuke points out quietly. "And nothing full price. He traded and haggled for everything instead."

"Still," Sakura presses. "He's the only one of us who isn't broke and he managed to get us a stay in every Inn we came across on the way home. Kind of weird."

Naruto stops, stares down that the cold meat bun in his hand, eyes squinted almost closed and shoulders tight.

He forces himself to breathe, to let the tension flow off and away.

He takes a bite of his bun.

Chews.

"I've never had parents," Naruto finds himself saying.

Around him the room goes absolutely silent.

"Don't have a Clan or a guardian or anything either," Naruto's shoulders shift restlessly, nails biting into the soft flesh of the bun in his hand. "Been living off the orphan's stipend since I was four. The pay from that is ... there's never been a lot to go around. There's always bills and supplies so I had to learn to make what I had really count. Being hungry for a long time sucks you know? Never want to do that again, not after the first few times. Not unless I have to."

"Y-You get mission pay now though right?" Sakura says, voice low and eyes wide.

"Don't get the stipend anymore though, that stopped when I got my headband," Naruto shrugs again, uncomfortable in his skin for a reason he can't properly name. "And mission pay gets split so ..."

The quiet is thick around them. Sasuke is practically glaring at his bowl and Kakashi-sensei's knuckles are white around the edges of his book.

"But yeah," Naruto finally says as he pushes himself up onto his feet, half eaten bun in hand, and turns to hop up onto the windowsill, "I learned money stuff real young. Probably the only school thing I was ever really good at."

A flex of muscle has him out the window and sitting on the edge of the roof, feet dangling and conversation officially over.

The rest of the night and the journey back to Konoha proper is quiet.

The next time they go on an extended mission outside of the village it's Naruto who's in charge of any and everything even remotely money-related as soon as they pass the border.

And if their mission pay starts getting split three ways instead of four, well, Kakashi-sensei doesn't say anything so Naruto doesn't either.