Abstained.
Okay.
I’ve been reading way too much angst, and I’ve been listening to breakup songs for only God knows how long.
CW: Angst, Use of Scara’s real name, Sumeru archon quest spoilers, i want someone to die so one of you has to go.
Heavily inspired by Kung ‘Di Rin Lang Ikaw ‘nd Sa Ngalan Ng Pag-ibig and some of the bold sentences are rough translations of the lyrics, since I don’t know the accurate translations.
If you aren’t the reason to love, would I stop my heart from getting hurt?
Kunikuzushi was beyond saving, he was impossible to love. His own creator abandoned him, his only friends left him, and being faced with his own immortality, he knows that you’ll leave him too.
You believe that through your flaws of mortality, you would do you best to stay by his side for eternity.
But as he drifts of into the company of another, a scholar by the name of Haypasia, you question if he is worth the trouble of loving.
“Scaramouche, it’s been only 2 days after your most recent visit to Haypasia, would it be possible to ask of you one thing?”
He merely scoffs, dismissing the idea of resting, if it meant showing affection to his most devoted follower.
It is a true wonder you haven’t left him yet, despite how inconsiderate he is towards your personal feelings.
If it isn’t you, then it won’t be at all, I won’t hope for us anymore.
The Doctor offered you revenge, wealth, and power, all you had to do was to betray Kunikuzushi.
But you couldn’t bring yourself to put him in a much more dire situation, thus you decline.
Yet do you truly feel this way about him?
“You never truly cared for me, Haypasia has been showing her dedication and devotion to me ever since she made contact with her new-found God.”
Scaramouche seethes, venom spilling from his mouth
“If I were you, I’d do exactly as Haypasia, in hopes to win over my lover again.”
I’m shivering and I can’t move, my heart can’t force myself to love you anymore.
It proves true that the snow-lain land of Snezhnaya is not suit to your tastes,
but if it means staying as far away as humanly possible from Scaramouche, you’d go through whatever length to ensure his happiness.
To that of Haypasia, and not you.
If the frostbite and cold doesn’t take you, then may the fake god abrew in Sumeru take your life.
You once believed that you would take any step toward a brighter future for you and Kunikuzushi, but it seems near impossible to achieve that, if he is in the glory of another.
Do you truly love him now?
If it won’t be us in the end, I’ll stop myself from loving someone else.
“I vow to stay by your side for eternity, let the damned wake, and let the souls who mourn, do so with agony. I will shield you from the world and all it’s cruelty.”
—yet you, who makes such sacrilegious promises, only to succumb to sheer cold, and a slight pang of jealousy toward his “first” follower.
If you couldn’t love another, you might as well die with the vows you’ve made to each other.
That way, when he succeeds in entering godhood, he won’t remember you anymore.
But if I don’t remember who we were, who’ll cry in the morn for us?
Before setting foot into Sumeru, you haven’t even heard of Irminsul.
Much less known that Irminsul contains the memories of everyone, which holds little to no regard from Scaramouche, until he caught wind of what recently happened after his downfall.
“[First], pronounced dead. I believe you have no use for them anyway, since Haypasia is your one and only follower, am I correct?”
Il Dottore, 2nd of the Harbingers, announcing your death to the former Harbinger has his mouth agape and speechless.
He believes that it is all his fault, his status, his arrogance, and his vile nature that caused your death.
Shortly after his defeat, he was assigned to carry out a task for Lesser Lord Kusanali and the Traveler.
Enter Irminsul and attempt to find more information on the Descenders of Teyvat.
In his subconscious, his new-found information on the erasure of existence from the Traveler has his full attention.
Perhaps, if he never met you, if he never tainted his self-image, you could live happily together with him in his next life.
With the knowledge of Irminsul, he begins infiltrating its memories in hopes to have his soul reborn into your arms again.
I’m letting go, since I can’t move anymore.
But would I stop your heart to yearn for another?
He succeeded in erasing The Balladeer’s existence of this world, but it was in vain.
You couldn’t hang on to the tiny bit of life you have anymore, and withered away from his grasp.
In all the years of his life, he has never experienced such grief in his life.
His mind though hazy, tries to cling on to what little memory he has of you in the back of his mind.
Kunikuzushi was impressed to say the least,
you really did love him, even if he wouldn’t love you anymore.
At the cost of the recognition as a God, the price would be his only source of hope and warmth.
“Until our end of time,
until our hearts feel nothing anymore,
even if forever ends,
I’ll wait for you, in the name of love.”
ngl i still dont understand how to post on tumblr and the last post i have is march ‘22
ang sarap siguro ng feeling na mahal na mahal ka nya tapos gagawin nya ang lahat para sayo, dwow👍
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