#to about planes and he understands EXACTLY what I'm saying 3. I wouldn't even really consider us friends 4. I'M FUCKING AROACE

[feralnumberfive]

Straight people stop assuming a guy and a girl being friends and talking to each other are dating and flirting challenge ‼️⚠️ IMPOSSIBLE ⚠️‼️

[chouettecrivaine]

Love's the Only Medicine [Honkai: Star Rail]

Fandom: Honkai: Star Rail

Characters: Dr. Ratio

Notes: SO. First off, those of you waiting on Lyney fic, it is postponed for now because I'm stuck :( but for now I'm working on a Dr. Ratio fic and I'm having a little trouble so these are my headcanons for how a good/healthy relationship with him would actually work because I love to write fluff all the time <3

So, how does one go about romancing the Dr. Veritas Ratio?

∘∙⊱⋅•⋅Have independence. Dr. Ratio is a busy man, and while he'd of course value your relationship (why else would he be in a relationship in the first place?), he wouldn't fare well with someone who is the clingy type. A relationship that would work best for him is one where you share in each other's missions, victories, and defeats as best as you can without melding your lives into one singular identity. With the exception of certain instances where you worked with him prior to the relationship starting/getting serious (though even then, he might drop the idea of separating your work paths a little bit to ensure there is no space for rational, scientific endeavors to be tangled with personal emotions), Dr. Ratio is perfectly content to with a relationship where some aspects of your lives don't always cross. Of course he wants to spend time with you! He just appreciates his own ability to act independently and keep work and personal matters separate. (Plus I feel like he'd find independence kinda attractive anyway :P)

∘∙⊱⋅•⋅Keep him grounded. Dr. Ratio gets lost in his thoughts frequently. He understands that facts and calculations can only go so far in the real world (though they could go MUCH FURTHER in his opinion, hence his cosmic mission to eradicate foolishness) but he loves finding the rational, mathematical answer to things. It'll be up to you to navigate a little bit more expertly on this plane. If he's trying to piece together a solution to a planet's hunger crisis, well, maybe let him sort through his lofty thoughts then. But if he's simply ignoring the world and thinking for the sake of it, you'll be able to get away with poking him out of the stupor and getting him to actually communicate with the world around him.

∘∙⊱⋅•⋅Be the people person, but don't apologize for him. Veritas has a tendency to rub people the wrong way. He's rude, abrasive, and arrogant. When others say such things without realizing you're nearby, you AGREE with them. But these are all things he knows, too. In most cases, how the reception of information makes somebody feel doesn't particularly concern him. But sometimes, especially now that he's actively placing himself in the social situation of being in a relationship, talking with people in a constructive way is necessary. He's fine with defaulting to you in these instances if it makes you feel useful. However, it is simply a matter of leaving a task to the one who knows better. If you start apologizing for his silence or a prior brash attitude, though, then he gets a little prickly. He stands by his behavior! Don't make him out to be someone you should have to apologize for or ashamed of.

∘∙⊱⋅•⋅Have clear communication skills. Listen. Veritas is an eloquent speaker, and he says exactly what he means to. However...good communication is more than just saying words that mean exactly what you want them to. You have to present information in a way that others can receive, and that's where he falls flat. The onus will fall to you to exemplify that sort of skill. Now, you don't have to teach him step-by-step how to talk nicely, but being able to do so yourself and give him a gentle nudge when it really matters will go a long way in ensuring you're talking to each other and not at each other.

∘∙⊱⋅•⋅Argue with him. Like, not actually. Argue with him academically. Veritas has stated that he feels incorrect on a matter if people agree with him. So don't agree with him! Don't spark debate just for the sake of it, but you shouldn't be afraid to voice your opinion when it goes against his. Dissent is the forebear of accuracy, after all. He won't be gentle with his arguments, but he never means to condescending when you're sharing your scholarly ideas. (Plus, this will help you get accustomed to when he is actually trying to argue you in a less casual context)

∘∙⊱⋅•⋅His love language? Quality time. Wanted all across the galaxy to solve this crisis or that, Dr. Ratio is a busy, busy man. So when you come in at the top of his list of priorities, that's how you know he's in deep. If you receive a certain love language particularly well, he can adapt! But his default is both to give and receive quality time. Even just time together that isn't attentive and specifically for each other can mean a lot to him. If you're both busy with work, he can be placated by attending to your duties but staying in the same room as each other. Don't worry about distracting him, either - as of late, he finds himself distracted when you aren't around, and at ease when you are.

∘∙⊱⋅•⋅Have a hunger for knowledge. It can be intimidating to hear him denounce all fools of the universe when he doesn't give many specific answers as to what a fool is. Veritas doesn't care about a lack of knowledge; what he cares about is a lack of awareness and a lack of trying. He'd be a fool himself if he pretended as though everyone had the same access to the same level of education, or that there weren't people who gravitated towards certain skills. After all, he's widely regarded as a genius, but you don't exactly see him releasing academic journals on any musical studies, do you? (Now, could he write one? Probably. But that's not the point.) As tough of a teacher as he is, what he's after is undying tenacity; that you never falter in the face of obstacles, and that you never place your scholarship on a shelf so high it winds up collecting dust, unused. If you don't know something, that's fine - go figure it out! Don't just say 'I don't know' and leave the matter at that. Learning through experience is an incredibly strong way of gathering knowledge. Just...don't expect him to be any nicer about your lack of prior knowledge just because you are close to him or you are trying to remedy that. At the end of the day, you did fall in love with a guy who's just kind of an ass sometimes :/

∘∙⊱⋅•⋅Be honest. This is one that could go for anybody in any relationship, but it is a top priority for Dr. Ratio. He's based his entire life on searching and spreading absolute truth in every corner of the cosmos. Normally, this takes the form of objective, empirically provable fact. But he finds it frustrating if you won't be honest about your feelings or what you want, how is he to know what to do? You'll have him acting like a fool with your refusal to face your own truth! (This is, of course, a roundabout way of saying that he doesn't have it in him to be playing games. Be straightforward with him, please. It'll be much easier for the both of you that way.)

∘∙⊱⋅•⋅Don't be afraid to get a little poetic on him. Veritas is a scientific man. He understands artistic endeavors, of course, but that isn't how his brain is wired. He operates in verifiable conclusions and building hypotheses, not the more abstract patterns of intuition or leading by the heart. He can analyze and understand such things, but if you want him to be able to appreciate the aesthetic beauty of the world, you will probably have to lead by example. You won't change his way of thinking, but maybe if you see a rare bird one day, he'll appreciate the opportunity to see something so rare and beautiful instead of analyzing how far it has deviated from its normal breeding grounds.

∘∙⊱⋅•⋅Flirting is a game, but love isn't. Don't be so dull with him! Dr. Ratio would love an opportunity to subtly ash his wits about yours in a little flirtatious back-and-forth. Both in the early stages and a more established relationship, Dr. Ratio loves a good challenge and could spend all night just trying to out-flirt the other. Regardless of whether or not you're one to get flustered, he loves your reactions anyway. Sheepishness, frustration, no emotion whatsoever - whatever you feel,, he finds how you try to school your expressions into complete apathy amusing. He is hard to fluster himself, but if he continues the same line of teasing in the morning the next day, you can assume he's been thinking about you all night. However! Dr. Ratio often expects people, especially those precious few who he respects, to operate on his level. If he's truly buckling down for the long game, he'll make sure to make his feelings clear. Flirtation is always on the table, but "playing hard to get" or trying to "keep him guessing" as you near a truly established relationship is a turn off. Flirt for fun, not to manipulate his interest in you. Believe him, he would've left by now if he wanted to.

∘∙⊱⋅•⋅Look beyond his scientific approach to matters of the heart. In loving anybody, you'll have to learn how to read between certain lines. Even if you are a pure-blooded emotionally charged person, Veritas can only meet you halfway on the road to compromise. Take the time to study how he speaks and what he means- concise as he is, speaking so straightforwardly all the time often has an opposite affect on his words when he's trying to be romantic. Learn the ways he looks after you and tries to make your life easier without asking; notice how he spends a large portion of his available time with you, even if it means dragging you along to discussing things with people who he feels are completely beneath his IQ; realize that his tone may always be steadfast and dominating, but he never speaks out to shut you down or demean you the way he does to others. If you can translate all the little ways he uses to show you how much he values you, then you may just find yourself in a relationship far more enriching than you'd expect.

[beepboop358]

heey! so, i'm really not trying to invalidate Byler and I do think you're onto something with the evidence and they definitely could be endgame (and I don't think what I'm gonna ask would change that at all). But, can I ask you a question?

What do you think about Will asking Mike to not tell the others about his episode in the Upside Down and then Mike actually tells Lucas and Dustin?

I get that it was a serious moment, and maybe he just has to tell them, but metaphorically or something like that, Will trusted Mike with something important to him and Mike kinda looked past that? I mean he even ephasizes he remember Will told him not to tell. What do you think of that?

I hope you're doing okay! ♡ And I hope this doesn't sound negative, it really isn't my intention. I still think the Byler evience has a lot of potential.

hey anon! no worries at all! you are always welcome;come to sen me any questions :)

This might be a little longer than you wanted so I apologize 😂

First off it's not a huge secret Will is having episodes because Lucas and Dustin were there to witness his episode on Halloween (ep.2), so they know something is up. They just think it's all in Will's head, and they don't have any details of what is happening.

Later in this episode, Will tells Mike about the episodes he has been having. He tells Mike not to tell the others, because they wouldn't understand, and then they have the crazy together conversation.

Mike doesn't break Will's wishes for him not to tell the others, without permission from Will to do so.

In Episode 3, Dustin introduces Dart to the party, and Will recognizes Dart's noises from the upside down:

Dustin thinks he has discovered a new species, so they go to show Mr. Clarke. Will and Mike are in the hallway, while Max, Lucas and Dustin are in the classroom already. Will tells Mike that

conversation about Will's episodes being real & Dart, happens in ep.3. Before that scene however, Will comes up to Mike and says he needs to tell him something about Dart:

It's Will's choice to bring it up to Mike. He's initiating here, so it's not like the next scene is completely against Will's wishes or anything.

Will is too afraid to tell the group himself, but he knows it's important to tell them because if Dart is from the upside down then this is really bad, so naturally he goes to Mike to tell him first about knowing Dart is from the upside down, therefore giving Mike permission to bring it up to the group.

And finally we have the conversation with all 4 boys where Mike suggests to Lucas and Dustin that maybe the episodes Will are having, are actually real and he has somehow acquired true sight (the ability to see into the ethereal plane as described by Dustin) which would mean Dart is from the upside down.

Mike doesn't betray Will's wishes at all by bringing this up to the group because Lucas and Dustin already know about the episodes already, and Will gives him permission to tell the others about how he heard Dart in one of his episodes, and Mike doesn't go into detail about exactly what Will has experienced in his episodes, that stays between the two of them. And this is the scene where we get Mike & Will pictured in front of the rainbow apple logo, which was designed as a reference to Alan Turing (who Will does his hero project in season 4 on) for his contribution to computers, and who was also a gay man, who killed himself by eating an apple laced with cyanide because being gay was illegal in Britain at the time, all while Mike and Will's hands nearly touch on the table :)

Thanks for the ask! I accidentally deleted this the first time I wrote it so I'm sorry I couldn't get it out a little sooner. You don't sound negative don't worry :) I hope you're doing okay too and I hope you have a good weekend <3

I accidentally did the wrong scene, so here’s the original scene this anon meant (sorry again! 😬)

[racheloveyunho]

Till death do us part - 3

Y/N grew up in a wealthy family, she always was seen as a beautiful and smart kid and was most likely to take her father’s place as the CEO of one of the most important companies in South Korea. However, after the death of her mother, Y/N’s family slowly started to break apart. Her father was always working to forget his uncalled pain while his kids were left alone at home.

She was 17 years old when her life took a sudden turn when she met him in a dark alley. He was a bloody mess, bruises everywhere but behind blood and dirt, she could see his beautiful features and his addictive gaze. Maybe she should have walked away, maybe she shouldn’t have helped him, but the moment his gaze locked with hers, she was already his.

Choi San was his name.

Genre: Mafia AU, smut, angst, fluff, stranger to lovers

Words: 2479

TW series:  Y/N is described as an OC. Please be aware that this story will contain  a lot of triggering content such as smut, blood, death, murder, drug,  kidnapping, etc. Do not read if you are under a legal age!

TW chapter: reader got slapped, reader run away from home, abusive and manipulative father, swearing.

The beating of my heart quickened. For the past two years I had dreamed about him every night and now, I was finally able to see him again.

"San!" I shouted happily, finally looking back at the handsome boy. He smiled back at me but his expression became cold again as he stared at Jinyoung. My so-called husband let my wrist go and hardly swallowed his spit.

"Y-you! What are you doing here?"

----------------------

Chapter 3

"What? Do you know each other?" I looked up at San for an answer

"His father is a customer of mine. I worked for him a couple of times, right Mr Hwang?"

Jinyoung stepped back with fear written all over his face. He was afraid of San. I somehow understand his feeling, I knew too well how San could be intimidating.

"I wouldn't ever touch Y/N again if I were you." San said with the most cold voice I ever heard in my life "I get upset pretty easily and I can't think straight when anger come over me. I guess you can understand."

"Why are you protecting her, I don't understand!" My fiancé shouted with fear in his voice.

"Because she's mine."

I blushed madly at San's words. Hana squirmed like a fangirl and clapped her hands while making embarrassing noises. I wished she wasn't there at this moment, I was over embarrassed and she wasn't helping me AT ALL.

I hide my face behind my hands. I wasn't paying attention to the two men's conversation anymore until I felt San's grip lightly tightening around me.

I looked up, Jinyoung was gone without my noticing.

"Are you okay?" San whispered to my ear.

‘Does he have to look at me like that? He’s driving me crazy!’

"He left?" I asked.

San nodded before letting me go. Strangely enough, I felt a wave of sadness and disappointment from the loose of contact even though I couldn't say it out loud, San would probably think I'm crazy since I met him just twice.

Quickly, Hana went to my side, grabbing my arm and shaking it with all her strength.

"Are you THE San?" She asked San with her eyes sparkling.

The moment I saw San's smirk I wished I could have run away from here. I looked at Hana with wide eyes and whispered "Could you stop being obvious for God's sake!"

It was no help, Hana was too happy to finally meet the man I talked about every day and she wasn't paying attention to what I was saying "You are indeed handsome!" she exclaimed "Do you have a girlfriend?"

'Oh God.'

"I don't..." he paused "yet" San looked at me with his sharp eyes.

I turned back and hide my red face the best I could. I was not the kind of girl to turn shy easily but San had this effect on me, he made me feel weak in my knees and made my heart raced.

Meanwhile, Hana was the happiest in the world at this moment, she knew that I never was on a relationship before so she was surely excited to play cupid for the both of us.

After a quick chat, which boiled down to Hana asking questions about everything and nothing, San told us that he was going back to his work and had to leave. 

He walked away, but I followed him and with all the courage I could muster up, I grabbed his wrist to stop him. He looked back at me with a surprise expression.

"Can...Can you give me your phone number? It will be easier to see each other this way..." I looked straight at him, facing his usual strong gaze.

However, I wasn't as brave as I wanted to pretend and San wasn't dumb, my shaking hand grabbing his strong wrist was a clue enough for him to know how I really felt.

He smiled at me with a sincere and warm smile for the first time, his dimples in full display, before he gave me his hand. I looked at it, confused, and put my hand on his own.

"Not your hand, give me your phone. Don't you want my number anymore?" he laughed at my action and again, my face turned red.

"Yeah, sure!" I stuttered, giving him my phone. He quickly entered his number on it before giving it back to me.

"Let's talk more often then, Kim Y/N"

Hearing him saying my whole name was something special, a mysterious feeling grew inside of me but it wasn't an unpleasant one.

I waved my hand at him as he walked away, disappearing from my sight.

"I think I need holy water" Hana breathed out.

It was already 9 pm, the sun was giving way to the dark night where the moon reigned as a queen.

It had been a long day, a very long one.

I met Jinyoung, my unwanted fiancé, San helped me against him and Hana hadn't let me get home until I admitted that I had a crush on San.

It was weird to say it, I wasn't familiar with this new feeling. Was it love? Was it possible to feel love towards him already or was it just a physical attraction?

I threw my head on my pillow and yelled on it while shaking powerfully my legs on the bed.

Yes, San was handsome, but he wasn't just that. He had something that attracted me and I couldn't explain what. It was like he was the answer of all my doubts and all of my issues. He was strong and intimidating but at the same time soft and reassuring. The last time I’ve felt this safe in someone’s arms was in my mom’s.

Bip Bip.

I looked at the small screen, a small notification indicating me that I had a new message.

I jumped out of my bed and stood up, excited by just some few words.

San

"Did you get home safely?"

Me

Yes I did! I hope you got home without any issue too :)

No answer.

San didn't seem like the talkative type. I had to choose a topic to continue the conversation or else he wasn’t going to answer.

Me

So...How old are you exactly? Do you still live with your family?

To my surprise, San answered me right away and we both talked for a few hours, totally forgetting about sleep. He talked to me more than I initially thought he would and I was glad for it.

I found out that he lived with his father, mother and older sister in Seoul in a rather affluent neighborhood. He was the same age as me and told me he had always been home schooled so he had a lot of free time.

He was following his father's path and helped him with his work.

I didn't asked him about it but I could easily guess that his dad worked with politicians since he San and Jinyoung knew each other from his dad’s work.

After a three hours long talk, I finally fell asleep while writing a message to San.

San

Sleep tight Y/N.

I slowly opened my eyes when the warm morning light hit my face. It had been a long time since I last sleep that well. I stretched my body and directly texted San.

Me

Hello San! Sorry I fell asleep, I slept well, maybe thanks to all the things that happened yesterday lol!

I waited some minutes but he gave me no response. Was he still asleep?

I went downstairs and only found my father, eating alone. The table seemed bigger than usual without Jin there and I couldn’t help but think about my brother, I hadn't see him since the argument between him and my father and it was worrying me.

"Where is Jin?"

"I don't know where he is living now." My mouth opened at his statement. My unstable eyes were reading his face, trying to figure out and hoping that I heard things wrong.

"What do you mean? He lives here!" I shouted, my voice sounded less confident than usual.

My worry was growing at an incredible speed pace. I felt unwell for some reason and was afraid to understand the real meaning behind my father's word.

"Not anymore. He's an adult now, I no longer have any obligation to keep him home."

I couldn't believe what I was listening to. He kicked his own son out? How dared he?

I was about to shout out at him but his phone rang at the same moment. He took the call and started talking with an unknown correspondent.

His face quickly dropped and then glared at me with angry eyes. I gulped, unaware of the situation.

When he hung up, he angrily stood up and harshly slapped me on the face "What have you done!" he yelled.

My eyes were watering. He hurt me. It was the first time he laid a finger on me.

"Mr Hwang called me! His son, Jinyoung, met you yesterday and want now to end your engagement."

"It's for the best, I never wanted this anyways" I replied curtly.

He was about to slap me again but put down his arm and chuckled darkly "Fine, if you want to be a brat then I will treat you as one"

My father strongly grabbed my arm and dragged me to my bedroom, he was so angry and so harsh, he was, without any doubt, going to leave bruises on my body.

He threw me on the bed and took my phone with him.

"You won't be needing your phone anymore, I'm confiscating it. In the meantime, I want you to think about your behavior." he said "If you don't want to listen to me, then I will show you who is in charge here." he walked away "Ah, and just to say, this week you will took a plane and will go abroad to study." He informed me before locking the door and leaving me alone in my room.

"You can't do this! You can't force me to leave!!" I banged on the door fiercely. It was a nightmare, it couldn't be happening. I sat down, my back against the door and my head on my knees, silently crying. 

It was already late at night, I didn't do anything the whole day. The only thing I could do was crying.

I finally wiped my tears away and stood up, determined to leave this house. I took a small bag and filled it with some clothes, wallet and other essential stuffs. I waited until no more noise could be heard in the house and quietly leave the house through the windows.

It wasn't as hard as I thought it will be, I found myself a new talent that night.

I went to the bus station, it was too late so there was no bus anymore.

Shit

I walked to the nearest hotel and went to the reception.

"Excuse me, I broke my phone and I really need to call someone to pick me up to go home. Is it possible to use your phone?" I asked with puppy eyes.

The male receptionist fell right away for my charms and gave me his phone, glad to help a young girl in distress. I thanked him and called my brother.

I silently thanked my good memory and was glad I remembered all the numbers on my phone. "The person you have called is unavailable right now..." the voice announced.

“No way...” my shoulders fell from disappointment. I had no other choice but to let him a message on his phone.

"Hey Jin, it's me... Listen, I had some...problems with dad, he took my phone away so I don't have a lot of way to reach you. I heard that he kicked you out, I hope you did find a place to sleep, hope you're eating well, hope that..." I sniffed, not able to contain myself anymore. "I'm scared Jin, dad wants me to study abroad cause my fiancé brook our engagement. I picked some stuff and now I'm out of the house but I don't know where to go and..." my voice broke because of all the emotions I had inside of me. "I'll call Hana and see if I can sleep at her place or else I'll sleep in a hotel. I love you, I'll call you again tomorrow." I stopped the voicemail message.

This time I tried Hana's number, fortunately she was a phone addict so she would answer to my call. "Yes my love~?" I heard her sleepy voice "Hey Hana" I said, my voice still trembling "What happened? Are you okay?" Her voice suddenly turned serious.

I quickly summarized my situation to her. "Listen, sweetie. Tonight I can't come to you, you have still money right? Sleep in a hotel and tomorrow you will took the first bus and come to my house, okay?" I agreed and hung up before asking a room to the receptionist.

The hotel room was half smaller than mine but it was better than nothing. There was a phone on the side of the bed.

'Should I call San?' I wondered while looking at the phone. Without a second thought, I entered the number of San and waited.

"Hello?"

"San! You answered!" I shouted through the phone, happy to hear his voice "I...I'm sorry I..."

"Where are you?" he asked "What?" I answered, surprised.

"You are not fine, are you? You're voice isn't as clear as usual."

I waited a long moment, I couldn't control my tears as they were running down my cheeks.

"Where are you?" He insisted.

"Dongdaemun hotel, room 322"

"I'm coming. Don't move." his voice softened.

My wait didn't last 20 minutes until I heard a knock on the door. I jumped and opened the door as soon as I heard the sound.

Here it was, the silhouette I liked the most

"San..."

He hugged me tightly as if there was no tomorrow. I noticed how he was sweaty and out of breathe, probably from running to get to me faster.

I breathed in his unique scent, it was woody scent, something fresh but still manly. I felt safer with him, everything was easier when he was by my side. I didn't want to let him go and my feelings seemed mutual as he tightened his grip on my waist.

I was like a piece of metal attracted to a magnet.

We sat down on the bed and he let me cry my heart out, listening every word I had to say. I told him my story, my conflictual relationship with my father, how harsh he was with me and my brother since my mom passed away and my arranged wedding with this Hwang Jinyoung.

We talked for two good hours about my problems but also about the future we both wanted.

As time went on, I started to feel sleepy, my eyelids were heavy and my mind was cloudy. I slowly closed my eyes until I fell into a deep sleep into San's arms. He gently patted my head to help me fall asleep.

"Don't worry Y/N, I will protect you from now on."

San hummed a song before falling asleep by Y/N’s side.

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I hope you enjoy this story so far! In the next chapter, Y/N is going to make a choice for her future life so the story will truly start in the chapter 4.

Of course, I’m not encouraging anyone to run away from home, mostly if you are minor.

Thanks for reading! See you in the next chapter~

Tag list:

@hijirikaww @pinkchampagne2 @xduygu-arsx @joongiebug

[morimakesfanart]

Sindria's Prophet #16

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15]

[AO3]

~POV Sinbad~ Mori wasn't just a Prophet, she had immense knowledge of her own that was going to make Sindria untouchable. Sinbad was going to achieve his dream much sooner than he had ever imagined. Mori was special; intelligent, clever, capable, and she could read the waves of Fate. Was there any other woman as attractive? The unknown craving that had plagued him for the past week was placated. Delicious wine, beautiful women, delicious food -none of his normal pleasures had fulfilled whatever that feeling was, but for some reason this moment with the his Beautiful Prophet was. "And now you're *my* kind and generous King Sinbad, ... Right?" Mori's bashful confidence was always endearing, but hearing her call him 'my King' in person made something snap in him. They were in a corner and Mori is small; he could easily block view of her in case any of the magicians turned around. He wouldn't even have to lean that far to get a taste of her. "DO EITHER OF YOU Have an ounce of self awareness??” Ja'far popped the bubble that had formed around the two.

King Sinbad froze. Everyone in the room was watching them. Sinbad stood up straight. He shouldn't exactly continue his plans with an audience. He removed his hand from the window and crossed his arms. Yam was practically shaking the magician next to her. "I wasn't the only one to see it this time!” An older magician with a beard laughed and said something like 'to be young.' Another said something a long the lines of "So it's like that then." Ja'far was still grumbling about his King's behavior -he should know better by now, he promised he wouldn't, etc. but 1. Sinbad didn't do anything wrong, and 2. he said he knew what he was doing -he knew how to handle flirting with Mori; he never said anything about not flirting with her. "And you, Lady Prophet," Ja'far changed targets. 'Oh?' Sinbad didn't expect Mori to be reprimanded for his flirting -although, she did flirt back. Ja'far continued, "You said that you knew about Sin's habits so wouldn't fall for him or-" "AAAAAH" Yamuraiha yelled over the other General as she crossed the room as fast as she could, and clapped a hand over his mouth. She turned to the King and Prophet with wide eyes and a forced smile. "Your Majesty! Mori! Would you like to see the spell again with our new changes?!" She didn't let go of Ja'far. The group of magicians started supporting her suggestion with "Let us show you," "I'm sure we've got it this time," and reciting the changes to the formula. They were clearly trying to stop Ja'far from discouraging Mori. Sinbad had no idea why they suddenly decided to become his wingmen, but it was convenient for him since he planed to do more than flirt with her later. Mori walked up to the Generals, although she only addressed Yamuriaha. "Yes, please! Even if it's not perfect I'd like to see your progress!" She spoke with the same forced enthusiasm as Yam. Sinbad only got a glimpse before Mori's back was to him, but her face was definitely a brighter red than it had been a moment ago. She was getting better at flirting with him, but she couldn't hold her composure for long. The King laughed as the head magician practically body checked Ja'far out of her way and left him out of the group before they preformed the newly revised spell. This time it produced a mostly clear stone. It wasn't a high quality diamond, but they had done it. They would have to be careful with this though since it could lower the market value of whatever they make. As they figured out the specifics for every substance they needed, Sindria could become fully self sufficient -they would still deal in trade so as to not completely leave the rest of the world behind. It was amazing. His magicians were amazing for being able to figure this out in such a short time, and his Prophet was just as -if not even more- amazing for knowing all of this and being able to explain it to them. When the excitement around the magic spell died down they finally showed him the microscope. It was a prototype so they had to be gentle with it. Two pieces of glass with water squished between them were slid under and when Sinbad looked through the lenses he saw the strange small creatures that Mori had written about. Seeing them forced him to accept that what Mori wrote about 'germs' had to be true too -and those were even smaller than these things. Looking at those things squirming around and knowing they were everywhere made his skin crawl. The King stopped looking through the device. "They really are real." "Yup." Mori responded plainly. "And now that you all know and have proof. There's going to have to be a lot of changes. The way illnesses are handled is obvious, but there's going to have to be a lot more changes to how food and housing and things are handle to better maintain sanitary environments. I know a bunch of sanitation procedures so I can help there too." Ja'far was rubbing his temples. "This is going to be a logistical nightmare. Do you realize that we are going to have to fix all those things and get all Sindrians to understand without having it affect our production or

trade??" "It's not like we're doing this alone." Mori tried to comfort him. "We'll figure something out." The conversation moved to this new problem. His Beautiful Prophet really was something else. She had solutions to problems they didn't even know they had. Mori had a habit of using her hands whenever she talked -even more when she was excited. She was cute and deserved to know, but she was in the middle of helping his people so he would hold his tongue and just watch her. If Sinbad was honest, he had stopped listening to the conversation a while ago and was just looking for an opportunity to finally ask Mori -and Yam of course- if they would join him for dinner so he could get all of his Generals more aquatinted with her. Someone mentioned a specific scroll in one of the libraries. Before the whole group could drag Mori out of the room, King Sinbad raised a hand and got everyone's attention. "I know there's a lot to do, but I have some things to discuss with my Beautiful Prophet as well." Mori looked back at him. "What is it?” It seemed that nickname wasn't as affective as before -hopefully it was just the timing. "Is it something we can talk about here?” "I was thinking we could talk over dinner," Sinbad paused to see how she would respond to the implications. Mori's eyes widened and her shoulders tensed, and best of all that blush came back. "With all of my Generals, of course." Mori blushed harder realizing he was messing with her. Yam looked disappointed at first -his Generals cared way to much about him finding a wife- but then she looked content with being a part of the plan. "You might have met them, and know them from reading Fate but they still don't know you yet." He finished. Yam spoke first. "This is a great idea. Pisti was just telling me that she wanted to get to know Mori." Mori regained her composer. "I'd like to get to know everyone personally too, so I'm find with this." It was a roundabout way of saying 'yes.' Her blush was gone but she was still embarrassed. With that settled, Ja'far let Yam and Mori know when dinner would be ready. It was a little earlier than he normally ate but this would give them more time to mingle before they'd be completely out of sunlight. "Well then," the King turned to his Prophet, "since we have some time beforehand-" "OH no you don't!" Ja'far cut in. "You've already had a long enough break *and* you plan on ending early today? The least you can do is work your butt off until then." --- ~POV Mori~ The King was pushed out of the room by his right hand man. I had a mix of relief and longing watching him go. "You'll see his Majesty again soon." Yam had a sweet smile on her face, but I knew better than to trust it. All eyes were on me and they were no longer the eyes of academics; they were hungry for gossip. I was not ready to explain why shipping us was a bad idea. "So about that scroll you mentioned earlier..." I completely shifted conversation back to the eventual rebuilding effort and luckily one of them obliged me.

I was lead to one of the libraries and handed a few scrolls on the construction used in the country. I had read a little on ancient construction methods out of interest and some on modern methods since my uncle worked in the industry. I had a little bit of experience with construction when I worked at a community theater, but it wouldn't be anything the people here wouldn't know. That paired with these documents showing how magic was used in the process made what little I did know completely useless. 'Can't know everything I guess.' I turned my head up towards the ceiling. I wasn't sure how much time I had left and I decided to use it soaking up the ambience of the library. The smell of paper, the maze-esc layouts, the quiet feeling; it's like a gentle space separate from the rest of the world. The libraries of the Black Libra Tower also had huge windows to let in a ton of natural lighting. I was really going to enjoy working in this place. --- Yam and I ended up lost in conversation, so someone ended up being sent to bring us to the dinner. When we finally arrived and opened the doors to the dining hall my nose was filled with the smell of herbs and delicious food. This was my first meal that wasn't paired with bitter medicine. I might have been procrastinating subconsciously to avoid the medicine I was no longer taking. Everyone was already there chatting. The long table was covered with food, but I couldn't make out any of it from the door. King Sinbad was sitting at the head of the table at the other end of the room with a goblet in his hand. Yamuraiha started in ahead of me and called into the room. "I'm sorry we're so late! We were talking about magical proofs and," she rambled in her explanation. I heard a few comments of congrats for getting better and said "Thanks" reflexively more than consciously. As I got closer, I ignored the Generals at the table to look at the spread. There were a few different types of fish, meat of some kind, a bunch of vegetables, and bread. It brought tears to my eyes; It was so beautiful. The Imuchukk laughed at my obvious interest in the food. "What are you waiting for? There plenty for everyone." He was sitting closest to the door. I didn't look away from the food when I answered. "I'm small with a small stomach so I'm going to need to pace myself to be able to eat a little of everything. If I save the best for last like I normally do then I might not even get to eat it." That garnered laughs and comments. I ignored them; I was too busy weighing my options. As the guest of honor I was placed at the opposite end of the table from King Sinbad. Thank goodness, because I didn't think I could handle being super close to him all evening. Even with the direct line of sight, I had distance to protect me. Yam sat on the other side of Hina from me. Pisti was on my other side. Sharrkan was across from Yam. Spartos was between Yam and Ja'far. Drakon was across from Ja'far. And Masrur was between Drakon and Sharrkan.

I picked up my plate to get food. "Alright. I've decided to just grab my favorites. If I have room later then so be it!" I was used to being watched while I eat so their stares didn't bother me. I covered my plate in all of the types of fish and some vegetables. "I take it you like fish?" Sinbad asked while I was taking some of the fish that was on his end of the table. "It's my favorite!" I answered excitedly. I could tell as I placed the grilled fish on my plate that it was going to be heavenly. It was already flaking and letting the smell reach me faster. I couldn't wait to get back to my seat and took a bite of the fish. It melted in my mouth. I let out a squeak of approval as I grabbed another bite. After a moment Sinbad asked me another question. "What do you think of greasy foods?" It felt pointed. "I'll eat it if it's the only option, but I'm not a fan." The Generals made some comments that amounted to, "They have the same taste." I was too busy enjoying my food to think about what they were saying. Pisti asked me her own pointed question as I sat down. "Do you like alcohol?" They were comparing me to Sinbad. I suddenly remembered the Official Character Encyclopedia. According to it, Sinbad's favorite food was fish, his least favorite was greasy, and his favorite snacks were the types that paired well with alcohol. "I'm not a big drinker, but it's not like I dislike alcohol. I'm just allergic to sulfites." "Huh?" The group asked in unison. Time to explain one of my allergies again. "Sulfites are a very useful preservative so it was also added to a lot of foods back home including alcohol. All grape wines produce sulfites naturally. When I ingest about 2 shots of a drink that contains sulfites I will struggle to breathe for about an hour." As soon as the words were out of my mouth, the goblet of wine I didn't realize was in front of me was grabbed by Hinahoho. They all looked panicked at each other like they had just dodged a bullet. In an attempt to relieve the tension, Sinbad asked Yam to catch everyone up on the meeting from earlier. Yam started ranting about the progress we had made with the alchemy magic. While they focused on reclaiming the mood, I focused on the delicious food. I tried a root vegetable on my plate. It was a little earthy with a subtle sweetness. The seasoning added to the sweet, but also had a little spice similar to cracked pepper. It had been streamed so it wasn't crunchy. I was asked to repeated what I told Sin and Ja'far earlier about the tech of home, Their questions had me explain more about my world and many of the things I had done: volunteer work to get scholarships, marketing for some networking organizations and some other companies, an assistant and teacher in out of school programs for 6 years while also working at a theater to pay for my own education. I only mentioned some of the places I had traveled to. I didn't even get to the things I did as hobbies or in working toward my dream of being a full time writer&artist. "I'm surprised by how much you say you've done." Drakon commented. I had heard similar before when talking about my past. "Is it really that shocking? Considering my age, I think it makes sense for me to have done a bit." It's more shocking that I was doing all that while getting so sick from my chronic illnesses that I would be fully bedridden and need a machine to breathe at least once a year until I turned 15. But I had also ate up inspiration porn as a child as a motivation to not let my body hold me back if I could. "Aren't we around the same age?" Yam asked me in response. I laughed. "Do I look 23 to you?" I've been mistaken for much younger than I actually was for as long as I could remember. It 1st became a problem when I turned 18 and got told I was clearly 12 with a fake ID when trying to buy an M rate game (Devil May Cry btw). "You're not?” ”Nope.” I rested my elbows on the table, interlocked my fingers, and I placed my chin on top with a smile, "But I'm curious how old you all think I am now." At 25 I was mistaken for a 14

year old. At least, a few months back someone thought I was legal (they guessed 19). Most realized I had to be older the more they talked to me, but their impressions never fully dissipated. As frustrating as it was, I found amusement in times like this by turning my age into a guessing game. Sharkkan had the face of someone fearing they had hit on someone too young. "You are at least 20, right?” They all suddenly looked worried. "I'm definitely older than 20." I answered. Pisti laughed. She was also short with a baby face; she knew my struggle. "Maybe she's older than Ja'far!” Of course she would make the closest guess. "There's no way she's older than me." Ja'far scoffed. "I am older than 25 though.” I could have teased him but I held my tongue since he already seemed annoyed with me. "How old are you then?” Hina asked. "I'm 29.” I smiled at everyone's surprise. I might only have surface levels similarities to Sinbad, but when you're a simp for a fictional character does that really matter? "I was born on April 7th so I should only be 5 days younger than King Sinbad since he was born on the 2nd. However, I don't know if there's a time dilation between my world and this one. The day we met was Oct 3rd for me back home. It wasn't the same date here, was it?" Sinbad is 29, Ja'far is 25, and Masrur is 20 during the Balbadd arc; their 2nd set of ages are 30, 26, and 21 respectfully. Ja'far's birthday is Aug 30th and Masrur's is Dec 27. Those 2nd ages listed can't be for right after the 6 month time skip because no matter how you calculate it the shortest distance between those 3 birthdays is 8 months. I was really interested in how the current arbiter of this world was going to figure this out. "It was Oct 3rd here too." "Oh. Well, that's convenient," was what I said while my thoughts were cursing the arbiter. 'That lazy son of a bitch synced the worlds so they wouldn't have to deal with a time dilation. I can feel it. Hold on... I arrived on Oct 3rd; the coup was 4 days later on the 7th. 6 months later would mean Sinbad arrives back in Sindria on my birthday. Did some 'real me' somewhere plan a b-day present for myself in some self-indulgent fanfiction??' ((Yes. Yes, I did UwU & I plan on making Mori panic then too.)) King Sinbad had that smile on his face that told me he was ready to flirt. "I didn't realize we were so close in age." No colors got in my way when he talked. That was good. I was desensitized again, and wouldn't have to deal with unnecessary distractions. I couldn't tease Ja'far, but I could tease his Majesty. "I know, right? It's amazing what the difference of 5 days can do for one's complexion." Sinbad froze and his expression went blank. Something that was probably wine sprayed across the table as Sharkkan had a spit take before erupting into laughter with Hinahoho and Pisti. "Oh my" Yam murmured with a hand over her mouth. Drakon , Spartos, and Ja'far stared at me in disbelief. Sinbad still wasn't responding... Maybe teasing him about his age was a bad idea. So far, unless it was something important I flirted with Sinbad since that was the best way to get on his good side; hearing something like this from me must have hurt a bit extra. I had been so wrapped up in my thoughts that I forgot just how sensitive he was about his age. I ended up flailing my hands from nerves, and to get his attention. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that when I know how self conscious you are." He flinched. "I don't know if this will make you feel any better, but you won't look any older than you do now 5 years from now..." "I uh.. Is that so?" Sinbad asked as he started to regain himself. "It is. You'll be just as-” "If you're willing to talk about the future, does that mean you are finally ready to explain about those calamities you mentioned in Balbadd?" Ja'far cut in with a fierce look. He had been waiting for any mention of the future to bring this up. The King spoke with a gentle but stern tone. "I don't know if this is the time for that conversation. This is Mori's first meal with

everyone after all." "I'm fine. I made a promise and I intend to keep it. As long as everyone else is willing to talk seriously for a few mins, I don't see the problem." I had been avoiding this conversation for long enough. There were things I still planned to keep secret, but I couldn't avoid having this conversation forever. And besides, I could feel in the waves that Ja'far wasn't going to let this night end unless I explained some of it. ((I have the next 3 chapters written but it's going to take me a bit to draw all of illustrations & comics. Also, good luck to all the students reading this. I know classes are starting up again. Be safe out there.))

[sociallyawkwardfoxwriter]

Widofjord Fey Preview 3

Do I have any idea where this is really going? Absolutely not. Have a come up with a title for it? Yes, I have. Proud of myself for that. Yet again, this is not edited. Hope you enjoy!

"You have to be joking." He pulled his feet up on the couch and shifted closer to Fjord with his wine glass clutched close to his chest. "There's no way. That's utterly ridiculous."

"Are you suggesting I'm lying to you?"

"Ja, I am."

"Wow. I can't believe you would say that. I'm hurt. And here I was beginning to think we were friends."

"Friends?"

Fjord raised an eyebrow that he didn't know how to interpret, until a corner of his mouth tipped up in amusement. "Are we not allowed to be friends?"

"I don't see why not, but I don't have many. Most of them technically work for my mother, so I'm not sure you can count being forced to be around me as friendship. I don't know that I've ever really made a friend before."

"Ever?"

"Well..." He rubbed at his arms with a frown, then clenched his hands into tight fists before he could start scratching at them. "At the very least, it's been a while. Would you consider us friends now?"

"I don't see why we wouldn't be. You've been nothing but kind to me and you're certainly the best thing to happen to me today. Also, I don't think I've met anyone that knows as much as you do. That part is a little intimidating."

"There is plenty you know that I don't. You are simply out of your element. If we were on a ship, you would be much more equipped than I."

"Out of my element is putting it kindly."

Tentatively, he reached out a hand to place it comfortingly on Fjord's shoulder, earning him a small smile in response. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course."

"Does my appearance not terrify you? I must look so strange to you."

"I'm not exactly in the position to judge people on their looks."

"Why is that?"

"I've experienced plenty of people that are afraid or hate me just because I have orc blood. Nothing else matters to them."

"How strange." He tipped his head thoughtfully to the side as he objectively considered all of Fjord's features. "You're very handsome."

"That's, uh, kind of you to say."

"Do you not believe me?"

For a moment, Fjord hesitated to speak, then gave a dejected shrug of his shoulders. "I don't know. There's a lot going on right now. I'm having a hard time knowing what to believe. Not that I think you're lying or trying to lead me astray, I feel so out of my depth. Me being here doesn't even make sense. Why me? There's nothing special about me. If you hadn't showed up, I would've ended up dead anyway. What was the purpose? Why bother?"

"I don't pretend to understand the gods or fate or whatever you want to call it, but I've never found any use in questioning motives when there's nothing to go on. Maybe, you'll find there was a reason for it or it might have all been pure luck. Ultimately, it's up to you to decide what you do with the hand you've been dealt."

"I'm not sure if that was comforting or not."

"I was not trying to be comforting."

"Good to know. I guess I'll take the advice to heart and try not to have an existential crisis."

"An existential crisis is probably an appropriate response after the day you've had." The low chuckle that rumbled out of Fjord's chest released some of the tension from his shoulders. "But, figuring it all out can wait. You've dealt with enough today."

"What time even is it? It was night in the material plane."

"Time is a bit strange here. It doesn't work the same as it does on the material plane. That's part of the issue with sending you back. You could arrive on the same day you left or years in the future."

"I have to admit. There's a lot of beautiful things here-you're definitely the most beautiful person I've ever met-but this place gets more and more horrifying the more you tell me about it. I'm still kind of fascinated by it, which is probably stupid and will get me killed."

"It could. It has nearly gotten me killed on plenty of occasions."

"I can't say I'm surprised. You seem very curious. I imagine that means being too curious for your own good."

"My mother would agree with that assessment."

With a smile, Fjord moved closer and lifted a hand to tuck a strand of hair behind Caleb's pointed ear. "Would you put up with my curiosity for a moment more?"

"What do you want to know now?"

"How old are you?"

"How old do you think I am?"

"That is a dangerous question." His eyes narrowed as he tried to search for some clue as to what the correct answer might be. "I have no fucking idea. I've met plenty of elves and couldn't tell you how old any of them are. They could be thirty or three hundred. You look even more ageless than any elf I met. Plus, you said time is weird here, so this question was probably dumb."

"Not dumb. We do have some sense of time here. It's just different from what you are used to. I'm not sure what the equivalent would be on the material plane, but here I've been around for a little over a thousand years."

"A thousand years?"

"A bit on the younger side-"

"Younger side? You know, I'm in my thirties and people call me old."

"Your lifespan is much shorter than mine."

"That's downplaying it. My lifespan is a blink of an eye for you."

"That doesn't make it any less meaningful. In fact, I think yours is much more meaningful than mine."

"Why is that?"

"I've never been to the material plane, but I've gotten my hands on a few books. If they are anything to go by, you live your lives more fully and with more heart than we ever do. I'm over a thousand years old and you know what I've never had?"

"What?"

"A whirlwind romance. I've never experienced visiting a wondrous new place or adventuring out on my own or sailing. I've never been on a ship. You lived on one and I've never even seen one."

"Are those all things you want to do? Whirlwind romance, visit a wondrous new place, adventure on your own, go sailing."

He tried to keep his composure as his eyes looked down at his hands twisting together in his lap. "I don't know. I don't know if I'd like any of those things. Not that it matters, my life will be attending court and dealing with all the politics that come with it. Maybe, I'll get lucky and finally get an interesting offer from someone that will bring something new to my life. I tire of the revelry and deception. I sometimes wonder if this is some sort of punishment for something I did in another life."

"Hey." The soft press of fingers against the bottom of his chin urged his head up for a soft kiss that his body immediately tried to lean into to chase the warmth. "Now, you can check off being kissed by someone from the material plane from your list. It's not a whirlwind romance, but it's the best I can do."

"Is this why sailors in your stories are so dangerous? You're all handsome and kind and charming?"

"I'm none of those things, but I'm more than happy to lie and say yes."

His laughter nearly caused their lips to brush again in a phantom of the kiss they just shared. "All you're accomplishing by saying that is making me think I got lucky and stumbled upon one of the few."

"That is not what I meant at all."

"Too late to go back now. I've made up my mind on you. It'll take hard evidence to prove my opinion of you wrong."

"You're incredibly stubborn."

"I've heard that before."

"Color me surprised." Fjord's eye roll was interrupted by a loud yawn that he immediately looked sheepish about. "Sorry. I swear I'm not bored."

"It's been a long day."

"A bit."

"I think that means it's time for me to show you to your room for the evening."

"I can stay up longer."

He ignored Fjord's words, instead moving in the opposite direction of his room to the much more lavish guest room. "Hopefully, it's not too different from what you're used to."

"I'm sure it's going to be much better than what I'm used to."

"You'll have to tell me in the morning. I can make adjustments before tomorrow evening."

"You're going to let me stay another night?"

"Do you have someone else to stay with?"

"Funnily enough, I can't say that I do."

"Then I guess you're stuck with me, until you can find somewhere better."

"I think you mean that you're stuck with me."

"We'll see." Before Fjord could step through the curtain, he pushed onto the tips of his toes to steal a quick kiss. "Now, I've been kissed by someone from the material plane and kissed someone from the material plane. A night of many firsts for both of us. Good night, Fjord."

"Good night, Caleb. Thank you for everything."

"You're welcome. I'll be in my room if you need me."

[ladywinterwitch]

Run Away (Eight- What You Gotta Do)

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Avenger! Reader

Summary: You and Steve complete each other. Your love is that strong and devoted kind of love that pushes people to things like marriage, making a family. You couldn't imagine that a baby would be something you really wished, until the possibility wasn't your choice anymore.

Warnings:  A bit of angst, pregnancy talk, mentions of injuries, mentions of abandonement (mild), fluff, reader is still an emotional rollercoaster, cursing and swearing, smut, unprotected sex (too late for these two lmao), oral sex (f recieving), brief mentions of body insicurities, Bucky’s a puppy dog.

Words Count: 5289

A/n: Part eight! I can’t believe that I’ve actually come this far lmao. Plus, me posting stuff with less than 44827 years of distance with each other? A miracle. I always said that I would wrap it up at 10 chapters,but while writing this chapter I realized that I will need one or two extra chapters + the epilogue. We’ll see. For now I’m happy to be able to write lol. Series masterlist here, main masterlist here. Enjoy <3

ps: Chris’s look in that gif,,,chile 

                       (gif not mine)

In the following week you saw Steve once a day, just to assure that he was doing fine. He wasn' sleeping in your shared room for the moment, but in a spare bedroom. You knew that you were probably being harsh with him, but you were so mad. It wasn't the first time that he did something stupid to try and save others. Hell, just think about that damned plane crash that put him in the ice in the first place.

You understood the reasons why, and basically everyone tried to talk with you and kinda 'sugar coat it' but the issue wasn't that you didn't understand: the issue was that he couldn't afford to think only about himself. Was it selfish on your behalf to think that way? Maybe. But you couldn't help it. You told yourself that it would've been different if you were just married, or just lovers. His decisions would've still been his. But now it's different. In less than six months he would've become a father. And that comes with responsibility. Wasn't he the first to tell you how important it was for you to put aside your job, for months or maybe even forever, just for the wellbeing of the creature inside you? That kid is yours just as much as he's his.

You and Bucky went out for a shopping trip that afternon. You would've asked Wanda, but she and Vision went to Clint's farm for a few days to see him and his family. Steve still had to be inside the tower, since he wasn't fully healed yet. You knew that he was watching a football game with Sam now, while Tony and Bruce were working on a new project, and Thor went to Asgard for a while to go check that Loki and Odin weren't at each other's throats.

You didn't mind Bucky's company at all. And in any case it wasn't like you felt like going out with Steve, not just yet. The brunette drove you both to the mall where he parked and then you went inside.

-So, what absolutely exciting and girly shops I have to visit today?- he asked while you curled your hand around his bicep. You laughed, looking up at him while you walked.

-Well, this mama is getting bigger every day, so I really can't wear my old clothes. I wouldn't even fit in them, and I can't go on with you guys' hoodies and t-shirts. I mean, I'm still a woman. Who said I can't look good while pregnant?- you responded, dragging him to a maternity clothes shop. As soon as you entered like half of the women in the shop turned to look at Bucky. You glanced at him and saw that he blushed and was looking everywhere except them. You bit you lip to not smile while you started to look around at the clothes. You made sure to engage in conversations with him to try and take the attention away.

-Damn homie, I think you just made those women regret their partners.- you said lowly so only he could hear you, and being a super enhanced supersolier, he did hear you very clearly. He snapped his head towards you with a look of disbelief on his face. His expression was so funny that you couldn't help but laugh. He looked around quickly then got closer to you.

-Stop it! It's already embarassing without you pointing it out.- he whined with a low voice. You stopped laughing but you couldn't help but smile, pressing your lips together.

-It's just so funny to me, because I understand these women. Turns out that pregnancy doesn't only make you sick, but also terribly horny.- you rose an eyebrow and he face palmed himself. You laughed again.

-Too much information, doll.- he groaned. You chuckled, putting in his hands a bunch of clothes. He caught them with both arms and followed you like a puppy to the changing rooms.

-Thank you kind sir, now I'm gonna see if they fit then I promise we're out of here.- you joked, hanging the clothes into the changing room. You closed the tent and he let himself fall delicately on one of the couches. He looked around while he waited but it turned out to be a bad idea when he saw the women from the various isles and even the shop's staff looking at him. He awkwardly smiled and then looked back at the closed changing room, sinking in his seat and covering the side of his face with a hand nonchalantly. He heard a few muffled giggles but no ne bothered him.

-Y/n are you done?- he asked, more embarassed than anything. Suddenly she pulled back the tent and started to gather a few of the garments in her hand. Bucky's gaze got caught on her figure. It was essentially the first time that she wore something fitting and not exaggerately large, so her belly was fully on display, even more so since she was turned to the side. The man felt a mix of emotions all at once and didn't quite catch the first time she called him.

-Buck, did you hear me?- he snapped out of it and stood to his feet, blinking a few times.

-It looks great.- he commented. You had on a nice flowery minidress, the sleeves were short and puffy, the square neckline showed just enough cleavage to remain classy, the breast area was tight but just below the skirt was soft and fell perfectly on your figure, showing the belly. You looked at him with a smile, chuckling slightly.

-Yeah, it fits well doesn't it? I'm getting these,- he gave a three dresses, two shirts, two t-shirts, two pairs of jeans and a pencil skirt to him, while she had other stuff in her own hands. -And I'm leaving these.- she sighed.

-Would you do me a favor? I'm dropping these off, meanwhile could you go to the pay desk? I'll be there in a sec.- he nodded and you thanked him while you walked away to the isles. Bucky walked towards the counter and dropped the garments on the desk, giving a quick smile to the girl behind it. He pulled out from the back pocket of his jeans the wallet and then the credit card, which was obviously Tony's, and put it on the glass above the counter. He waited a few seconds until the clerk, which was a nice girl with black hair and amber like eyes, spoke to him.

-So, how far are you guys?- she asked. Bucky almost choked on air at that phrase.

-Oh we- - he was about to say, but you arrived at his side and saved the situation. You smiled kindly at the girl and gave a pat on Bucky's arm.

-I'll be exactly of five months in a week, and he's more like the uncle than the father.- she tileted her head towards the brunette. The clerk smirked.

-Is he now?- she said rethorically. Then added, -That would be 277$. You're paying with cash or card?- Bucky gave her the Visa and she thanked him, finishing the payment. Y/n glanced at him with a knowing look and a slight smirk. He rolled his eyes and shook his head a little, she furrowed her brows as if to ask 'Why?' and he just mouthed 'No', so she didn't push. For now.

-Thank you for your purchase, congratulations and we hope to see you soon.- the girl said with courtesy, her gaze lingering a bit on the man, whom didn't return the look. You could see the slight disppointment of the girl.

-Thank you, have a nice day.- you saluted her and then headed out with Bucky. An hour had already passed and you still had in mind to buy a few things, but first you needed a break.

-I desperately want a piece of cake. What do you think?- you elbowed him delicately to catch his attention. He turned his head and nodded, still carrying the two bags. You arrived at the mall's cafe and ordered. He picked an iced coffe and you a slice of cheesecake and some tea, knowing that coffe wasn't that good for pregnancy. You took a seat at one of the tables outside, even tho you were still technically inside the mall.

-So, wanna tell me why you didn't accept the clear as the sun advances that the pretty shop assistant did?- you brought the fork to your mouth. He huffed and shrugged.

-Because I am not interested. I don't think I'm in the right mindspace to date right now.- he responded. You exhaled, tilting your head slightly to the side.

-Buck, I know that it didn't end up that smoothly with Nat, but she's gone.- she realized how that sounded like and quickly corrected herself, -I mean, not gone. But...gone, you know?- you cringed at your own words and he snorted.

-Very smooth y/n.- he joked, earning a glare from you.

-Shut up, I'm trying to help here. What I meant that while I understand that things with Nat didn't end up in the best of ways, she went away to give both of you the space you need to get back on your feet.- you paused, drinking a sip of tea, then offring the last bite of cake to him. He shook his head, giving you a lopsided smile.

-Don't worry, it's all yours.- you pointed your finger at him, while chewing the cheesecake. He chuckled.

-Right answer. Anyways, what I'm trying to say here, Buck, is that you have to allow yourself to try again. Because you deserve it. What do you tell me about that person you said you were interested in? I've never seen you with anyone in the last three months.- he looked to the side for a moment casually.

-They're taken so, yeah.- he simply answered, shrugging while taking a sip of coffe. You got sad all of a sudden. You eyebrows knotted in a sad expression and he noticed, giving you a small smile.

-Hey, don't do that. It's okay. I'm not like heartbroken or shit. I'm happy for her.- he assured you, -She.. well she has a family. She deserves it, so I'm happy for her.- he nodded, smiling softly. You smiled at him too, still with a hint of sadness. He took a nother sip of coffe an then raised an eyebrow, looking at you.

-Why are you crying?- he asked confused. You furruwed your brows in confusion and wiped your fingers under your eyes, realizing that a few tears had escaped. At that point without a reason, you started to feel worse and embarassed and a mess, so you sterted to actually sob a little. Bucky got up and moved his chair next to yours, hugging you.

-Hey what's wrong? I promise I'm alright.- he laughed to try and lighten the situation. You hiccupped into his chest.

-I- I know..it's just.. I don't know, these stupid hormones are making me act hysterical.- you had sittle sobs coming out every now and then. He kissed your head while he stroked your back.

-It's okay, you're not hysterical.- he chuckled softly making you smile. You pulled away from him looking in his eyes.

-I'm a mess aren't I?- Bucky wiped a little smudge of mascara under her eye, and then smiled at her lovingly.

-You look just fine, darling.- she hugged him, whispering a 'thank you, I love you' in his ear.

-I love you too- he answered.

After that, they finished their drink and Y/n told Bucky that she wanted to order a few things for the baby so they did just that. They went in a baby-stuff shop and she choose and placed some orders for a crib, a baby seat for both the car and the kitchen and the changing table. You didn't wanted to buy them right away, so you told the shop to bring them at the tower when they wanted.

When you exited the shop, it was already six thirty pm, so you decided to head back at the tower.

In the car, you told Bucky about your idea to get a midwife to help you during your pregnancy and especially when it'll be time to deliver the baby.

-I don't know y/n... I mean I think that you don't need a midwife or some other stranger to take care of you and the baby. You have Steve. You have me, and Sam, Wanda and the rest of the team. Bruce has basically become a doctor of everything, I'm sure that helping to deliver a child isn't that hard.- he shrugged while keeping his eyes on the road.

-I can't and wouldn't expect you all to babaysit me for another four months, Bucky. You have missions, classes, a you know, your own lives.- he glared at you, probably wanting to intervene and contraddict you, but he remained quiet in the end.

-And, you really can't expect Bruce to handle this. He's a fucking physician for God's sake. He's absolutely amazing, but a delivery? No, that would be too much even for him. And I would be kinda embarassed, for crying out loud.- you added with a high pitched voice. You absentmindely started to cradle your belly. He thought about it for a few seconds.

-I don't know y/n, you know how I am with strangers. But in any case it's your and Steve's decision. Please, talk to him. He's been miserable this week without you. He wouldn't shut up about how he was sorry, and stupid and in love with you and that he misses your smile, your belly and I don't know, I stopped listening after a while.- he said exasperatedly. You suppressed a smile.

-Really? - you asked sheepishly. He turned his head to look at you for a second before smiling knowingly.

-You know it's true. Your fucking married, for God's sake.- he said, tired of you two being idiots. He could just imagine how it'll be when you'll become parents. You will be great at it, but also a mess at the same time.

-Hey, Whiny Soldier, how was shopping? - Sam shouted when he saw the two of you coming in the room with your hands full of bags. You didn't see him, but you just knew that he pursed his lips and shook his head.

-

You came back at the tower just in time for dinner. Vision and Wanda had aprons tied on their chests, while the others were just chilling in the common room. Steve was there too, beside Bruce.

-Shopping was productive, thank you very much.- you answered pointing for Bucky to put down the bags.

-Let me help you take these to your room.- he offered, but you gave him a look and he understood immediately, putting them down. You smiled and kissed his cheek.

-Thank you for being my human cart today.- his jaw dropped, pretending to be offended.

-Oooh- Sam howled and the others laughed. Steve smiled slightly, still mortified by your little 'cold shoulder week'  thing.

-You're lucky I can't tickle you to death right now.- he pointed his finger at you before walking to the fridge to pour himself a glass of water.

-Yeah, yeah, like you say big guy.- you teased him. You paused, shifting your gaze to Steve. He was wearing a blue hoodie and gray sweatpants, his dirty blonde hair were starting to get a bit long at the sides and a few strands fell on his forehead, while his jaw was covered with a slight scruff. His puppy dog eyes met yours and you couln't help but melt a little.

-Steve, are you well enough to help me with these?- you asked and even before you could finish he was on his feet. He almost tripped from how fast he tried to reach you.

-Yes I'm perfectly well I mean I'd love to help you. I mean obv- - you raised an eyebrow and he stopped, looking down. The whole team was watching in silence like it was a damn movie.

-I'm rambling, I'm sorry.- he said lowly. You sighed and places three of the four bags in his hands.

-C'mon. And you all, get a life.- you called them out while you two walked to the elevator. A few minutes later, after the short, silent, trip, you arrived to your room. He placed the bags on the bed and you did the same after closing the door behind you.

-Help me take off the price tags.- you invited him. He grabbed the bag, taking out the first garment. It was a white baby onesie, with Captain America's shield logo on it in white, blue, and red. His breath got caught in his throat and he suddenly let out a sob.

You snapped your head up in confusion, your features softening when you saw him. He sat on the bed, head down, onesie still in his hand. You put down the dress you had in your hands and went to sit next to him, since it would've been really uncomfortable for you to bend on your legs now. You hand went istinctively to rub his back.

-Can we talk?- he asks with broken voice. You tilt your head to the side to look at him with the shadow of a smile on your face.

-Only if you stop crying. Or else none of us will be able to talk at all.- he chuckles slightly making you smile lovingly. He wraps his big arms around you, nuzzling his face in your neck, your collarbones exposed due to the large shirt you were wearing. The wave of relief that washed over you in that moment was hard to describe.

-I missed you so much, baby. I couldn't stand the thought of you being mad at me. I'm sorry for being so impulsive.- he sniffed while he talked. You nodded, cupping his face gently. Steve melted into your touch.

-I know you are. And I'm sorry too. I know that I've been harsh with you these past days, it's just...- he waited patiently, -You're not responsable for only yourself anymore. I understand, please trust me, I understand what you wanted to do and also that you feel like it's your duty to do that. And it kinda is, but my point is- you shook your head realizing that you weren't really explaining yourself.

-What I mean is that you cannot put your life behind other's. Not for me, not even for the team. We're grown ass adults okay? Fow how much you can love us and we can love you, we are our own person. But this- you placed his hand on your belly, -This had been a choice. Your, mine. We both are responsable for this life. The same way I gave up my job, and the lessons. Now, I'm not asking you to stop going on missions, but I'd like you to be with me as much as possible. And that when you go, you'll be careful. Please, Steve.- you say softly, almost in the verge of tears. Again. You've cried more in five months than in your whole life probably.

-You're right. It was pretty hypocritical of me to get mad at you for the same reason in the first place.- he shook his head in disappointment. You rolled your eyes, adding -Work. I think we'll have to rearrange ourselves in this department.- you smiled and he laughed, agreeing.

-So, are we gonna get these off the bed and use the space in a better way or what?- your lips curled in a seductive smirk that quite shocked him. He recovered quickly, jumping on his feet and placing the bags on the ground in a split second. You threw you head back laughing at his eagerness, but you honestly couldn't blame him. Your hormones were a mess and your horniness at level 100, but you often were either sick, tired, hungry or he was. And not to mention the missions that separated you. So let's say that since you got pregnant the sex decreased noticeably, which was something that you wanted to fix. You phisically missed and needed him.

He returned to you and crashed his lips to yours, and soon enough you were a mess of tongues and lip bites and sucks that got interrupeted just briefly to get your clothes off. He didn't have anything under his hoodie, and you happily noticed that he was completely healed and that his weeks in the tower were due to the lack of new missions. You sincerely hoped it would last. After his hoodie, his pants and boxers were next. With you the situation was a bit more complex: first the light material shirt you had on had to be unbuttoned, then your tank top, the jeans' belt and the pants themselves. When you were left in just your underwear, a plain set of cotton white bra and panties, Steve stopped to look at your body.

He was in awe of you. He rose his hand and started a caress that began on your cheek, his thumb on your bottom lip, then descended to your now fuller breasts, to the curve of your waist to to your baby bump. At that point he bent down on his knees and kissed it softly.

-Hey little one, if you want to take a nap, now it would be a good time.- he whispered directly to the stretched skin. You let out a sound that was halfway between of a whine and a laugh.

-Steve, Jesus Christ.- you covered your face with your hands. You heard him laugh and stand on his feet again. He removed your hands gently, kissing you again with slow, agonizing passion that even let escape a ridiculous whine from your lips at the loss.

-Where were we?- he reached behind your back and unclasped the bra, sliding it off your shoulders and freeing your breasts.

-Mrs and Mr. Rogers I'm sorry to disturb, miss Maximoff would like me to inform you that dinner's ready.- you stopped hearing F.R.I.D.A.Y.'s voice. You groaned, annoyed at the interruption, but Steve suddenly started to push you on the bed and to lick and suck your boobs.

-Tell miss Maximoff that we have dinner here.- he responded biting softly your nipple, making you whimper.

-It will be done, mr Rogers.-

-Geez Steve, couldn't you be more specific?- you sassed with a deep breath, distracted by your husband's mouth. He snorted moving further down to remove your panties.

-You're already pregnant, couldn't be more obvious than that.- you started to laugh, but it soon became a loud moan when you felt his tongue licking a long stripe on your pussy. You closed your eyes and istinctively wanted to bring your hand in his hair, but you found an obstacle. A medium big, round and naked obstacle. You huffed and Steve stopped, tilting his head to the side, since now you couldn't even see him from between your legs.

-Are you okay?- he asked, worry in his voice. You sat on the bed, helping yourself with your hands. He returned beside you, waiting.

-It's just..ugh I'm so awkward and big and not confident if I have to be honest.- you say for the first time out loud. You wanted to cover yourself by curling your knees to you chest, but again, you swollen stomach didn't allow it. At that point you got even more frustrated.

-Damn it.- Steve places his fingers under your chin and made you look at him. His eyes were serious but not mad.

-Hey, none of that. Do you even realize the miracle your beautiful body is doing? You're creating a whole life in there, baby.- he smiled brightly looking in your eyes, -And by the way, you're still hot as fuck.- that made you laugh. He kept smiling while he made you lay down again on the sheets.

-This beautiful face..these cheeks are even sweeter now.- he peppered them with kisses making you giggle uncontrollably.

-Don't get me started on these ones...- his hands cupped your breasts while his mouth attacked your nipples and the soft skin. You moaned softly, your hand immediately in his short hair, your nails delicately scratching his scalp.

-But you know my most favorite thing?- he kept going, -This.- he was now between your legs, kneeled in front of your stomach. He caressed it and kissed it a few times. Then his gaze  locked in yours again. You almost felt hypnotized, both by his velvety voice and his touch.

-I love it because it's round and soft and most importantly because it's giving me a family. A baby. And you know who's giving me all of this? You are. So don't ever be insecure about this wonderful body, please.- you smiled at him softly. Soon enough the mood changed again when he spoke his next words.

-Now, are you gonna let me thank this stunning body like it deserves or not?- you felt the smirk in his voice, his blue eyes hungry. You mirrored his expression propping yourself up on your elbows.

-Would like to see it.- you answer. He huffs out a laugh and reprises what he started doing a few minutes prior. He took good care of you until you came on his tongue, and at that point you grabbed him to crash your lips together. You kept moving and bringing him with you, until he found himself laying down on his back and you straddling his hips. Steve's hands immediately went to your sides, trying to not move and let you do the work, even though all he wanted was to fuck you until you both could't anymore.

You kept you eyes on his while you stroked him a few times before slowly sinking on him. He squeezed both his eyes shut and your hips, huffing a long breath. That could've almost made you laugh if you weren't just as wrecked. Your hips started moving, back and forth, to the sides in painfully slow circular motions. At one point he grabbed your ass, sitting up and making you gasp.

-Doll I'm kinda struggling here- he breathed out kissing your neck while you kept moving. -I want to be delicate but damn.- he nipped at your sweet spot between your neck and shoulder. Your hips started going faster with the help of his hands guiding you and soon enough you were panting and kissing each other passionately and messily.

-Oh, Steve I'm almost there- you moan hugging his head to your chest. He moaned too, reaching in front of you with his hand to circle your clit.

-I'm right behind you baby.- he reassured you while in reality he was trying hard not to come in that exact moment. He craved you more than usual, not only beacause your body was actually so fucking hot to him but also because he hasn't touched you for almost two whole weeks.

Just a few seconds later you gripped his shoulders, hiding your face in his neck. His breath got caught in his troath at the way you clenched around him when you came. And as a cue, he followed you short after, coming inside you. You stayed like that, hugging and cuddling for some minutes, then he kissed you and moved you gently on his side, hissing slightly when you lost contact.

-Be right back.- he said going to the bathroom and returning with a wet wash cloth. He cleaned you up from both of your releases and then went back to throw the dirty fabric in the laundry basket. You looked at him with a lopsided smile, still hazy and quite tired from the recent activity. He mirrored your expression with messy hair, crawling in the bed to you and pulling you on his side after.

-I needed that.- you say. He sighed, -I definetly did too. How come we always end up having sex after we argue or talk?- he asked casually. You shrugged.

-I don't know, the important thing is that the talk comes first and then, the sex.- he agreed with a nod. You chewed on you lip a bit before speaking again.

-Honey- you called, he hummed.

-While you were away last week I started to think about how I will probably need more help in the future, you know. And the fact that you and the others are often away on missions. And I mean it's totally alright, that's work but... I felt so bad when Sam and Wanda were left behind last time. And just to 'babysit' me.- he looked down at you with a frown.

-They offered to stay behind because they wanted to. We're taking turns on missions all the time.- he responded. You barely noticed that he had started to caress your belly.

-That's not the point, you know it. The last mission was quite big. I know my work well enough to know that Fury would've sent all the team, if I weren't left behind. Also by now we both understood that this baby isn't a normal baby and that is why I'm so sick so often. Bruce can't be here all the time, and for how good and skilled he his, he's not an expert in the baby field.- he was listening to you intently, but he wasn't quite sure with where you wanted to go with this.

-What's the point?- he asked, moving a strand of your hair from your face with his fingers.

-The point is,  that I've read a lot in these months, and I think that we should hire a midwife. It would be someone that stays with me most of the day and helps me. An actual expert.-

-And how would you explain that our child has the blood of two super soldiers?- his hand motioned himself and you. You got up, towards the bathroom.

-Steve, we share the house with a god, a giant green monster, enhanced people, a witch, a kid that has the powers of a spider and an intelligent robot. I think it wouldn't be a great surprise.- you closed the door, peed and then refreshed yourself before going back to take some clean clothes. You saw that he was waiting for you to get out, probably wanting to shower.

-Okay then, I guess we can arrange that, if that will make you feel better.- he finally spoke. You kissed his cheek, already in your underwear.

-Thank you. You're showering?- he nods, the raises an eyebrow.

-Wanna join?- you laugh and shake your head.

-No, baby not now. I get tired quite easily and if the bed's already a bit difficult to work with, the shower must be a nightmare.- he pouted.

-You're right.-

-But- he stops the door before it closes, waiting for you to continue. -I want to fix your hair and your beard if you let me.- a lopsided smile opens on his face.

-Be my guest.-

-

After you sat him down on the edge of the bathtub, you shortened the longer strands on top with tiny scissors. After that you picked up the electric razor and groomed the sides, shortneing them but not removing them completely. You did the same with the beard, leaving a short, barely visible scruff. About twenty minutes later you were done. You put down the razor and took a step back to look at your work.

-Perfect.- you commented, brushing the hair that fell on his chest and shoulders. He stood up and looked at himself in the mirror, smiling.

-Is there anything you can't do?- he asked. You smirked, kissing him before starting to clean up.

-No, I'm a woman.-

*************

Tag list: @polarcrystall​    @a--1--1--3​    @silver-winter-wolf​   @jessyballet​

[guigz1-coldwar]

'Only hope' : New chapter for "Redemption in a Spirit in a Cold War" is out !

"Only hope"

Chapter Summary : Yirina is troubled to have to go back in Cuba and it's worst when Park can't come with her.....

To read it on AO3, click here !

Words : +3400

--------------------------------

Cuba.....the country that I never wanted to come back after all these times and by all the odds, the man who we are going to neutralize named Vargas has to be there in Havana. He could have been in South America, in Asia or even back in the USSR but why it has to be exactly Cuba ? It was certainly going to be bad for me to put my feets back on the Cuban soil but I have no choice but to go there with Garrett : Greta is keeping the prisoner we got from the Perseus hideout in control while Park need to rest for her arm.....it was just me & Garrett.

We both prepared our bags quickly and then, we were on our way to the Tempelhof Airport as our plane, according to Garrett was there for us. It was weird for me to say that Park wasn't there with us in the mission and it was like my first days when I woke up : feeling kind of lost, trying to find her back again and frankly, I was resisting the urge to go back to the safehouse and stay with here but I couldn't do that....there were no step back for me and I wouldn't do that to Garrett, leaving him alone like that.

The flight was going to last at least 13 hours for us to arrive in Havana and since we are leaving West-Berlin at 5 PM and thanks to the timezones, we will arrive at our destination only after midnight with just one stop at Lisbon like we did to go to the New Orleans almost 2 weeks ago. With Garrett, I talked a little during the first hours until we arrived at our first and only stop. As the plane was getting refueled, we were awaiting inside the plane.

"Yirina, can I....ask you something ?" Garrett called me out as I was looking outside through the porthole to see the maintenance crew, refuelling the plane.

"Yes." I said, looking back at him, he was just sit in front of me, I was almost scared by him.

"Why are you stressed to go to Cuba ?" He asked me and I was a little troubled to talk about it.

"I...I can't tell you, Garrett." I replied, almost losing my words in the process. "There's things I can't talk about." I added, redressing myself in my seat.

"Listen, I know but there's things that I know about you." He affirmed, making me look at him with narrowed. "Things that Park told me about."

"Really ?" I breathed

"I know what happened to you with the CIA." He said, sure of him as I was looking at him almost chilling from the inside. "She told me a lot about what she did....she's still feeling guilty about it, you know." I was speechless, looking pale to him as I realize that he was well aware of my real state since a long time.

"It is something I don't want to talk about, Garrett." I admitted, it's still hard for me to mention it and talking about it to someone other than Park....it's really hard. "Park, I'm not blaming her at all, it's just the CIA that I'm blaming for it."

"She talk very nicely about you, each day." He told me with an grin. "You got very lucky to find yourself with her." At this moment, the plane started to move again, meaning that we will have to face the longest part of the flight to get to Havana.

"Thanks...thank you." I put my arms on the armrest as the plane was taking off the airport, putting us up in the skies again.

"Since you came back, you made Park smile again for real." He confessed to me, making me grin a little from it. "You did really had an impact on her that even Greta wasn't able to have."

"About Greta, how is she seeing it ?" I asked as for now, Greta was getting aware that me & Park was an thing and she maybe talk with it to him.

"To say, she was a little disturbed but she's getting over it." He replied, looking away through his porthole. "I'm sure that she will fully understand your relation with Park." He looked back at me. "You know, when Park did her coming out to me, I was impressed by it."

"When did she do it ?" I questioned him.

"She did it in 1976 after an mission in Poland and of course, she wanted to keep it a secret because of the ban in the MI6." He answered, looking at me with an great look. "Only me, you & Greta knows about it."

"Well, some people in the CIA know too now." I whispered, rolling my eyes as he was making wide eyes. "Don't worry, there are good peoples....except the one who the CIA is trying to save."

"Shit, Adler knows about it ?" He spoke to himself before sniffing away as I nodded to him. "That guy is really an pain in the ass."

"I'm seconding that by a lot." I joked before I laughed about it before I breath again, wanting to change the subject. "Anyway, you didn't tell me about who was Vargas precisely."

"Oh yeah." He looked at the table that was between my seat and his seat where the file about Vargas was on, the Greenlight one stayed back at the safehouse in West-Berlin. He opened up the file to make me look at it as I didn't have time to check it. "Name's Sebastian Vargas."

"Former soldier of the Colombian National Army, I see." I said, looking at Vargas records.

"He left the army to join the M-19, considering that the government was corrupt and to fight the cartel." Garrett added those intels that was not in the records "He joined Perseus in 1982, serving as an saboteur before he put himself to work with Stone."

"Guess that the MI6 is looking for him ?" I presumed and he nodded.

"At the beginning of the year, he has taken 4 british tourists hostages in Colombia and before the MI6 could do an thing, he killed them." He clenched his fists, talking about that event I wasn't aware of. "Since, the M-19 itself rejected Vargas because they didn't want to have us on their backs and after that, he stayed in Cuba."

"And now, we are going to track him down..." I cut myself as I put the records file back on the table. "Do you know why he's still in Cuba ?"

"First is to hide from the MI6's sight." Garrett started, raising his left index finger. "Second is because he will tell us who's the person helping Perseus with soviet weapons." He raised his left thumb to me

"So, we try to take Vargas alive." I said and he nodded again.

"I'm sure that the MI6 will be pleased to have his head." He affirmed before looking outside. "We know exactly where he is in Havana and thanks to that, we'll be just in Havana for an day."

"Let's hope so." I admitted, crossing my arms to look outside too....I really want to just be in Cuba for one simple day.

"Now, it's better to have some sleep." Garrett suggested as he get comfy in his seat, closing his eyes to the outside as I wasn't sure to have a sleep in here.

I was trying to not get to sleep as I wasn't feeling so tired now but the events of today even small gave me in an second an envy to get myself some rest and maybe trying to have some peace for the moment. Garrett was very quick to sleep almost 2 minutes after he closed his eyes as me, I was trying to do the same as him and it took me 20 minutes to replicate the same thing from him : closing my eyes, looking at the outside...just needing some peace.....

I was working late at my desk in the CIA safehouse, trying to find something on the Operation Red Circus leaded by Vadim Rudnik, the intels that Belikov gave to us during our mission in the Lubyanka was helping me but since it was nearly 3 AM in the night, these intels wasn't helping too much. I didn't know why I didn't try to bang my head on my desk, looking at all these papers on my desk. I really wanted to do this but I was soo tired to do a thing but also because my nose was hurting me because of Adler's punch one hour ago

It was just me working in here, the other were all sleeping in their beds and my desk was the only light in the whole place to be on. Seriously, I was wondering why Adler wanted me to still work lately and why I had to agree to his stupid orders to stay awake, giving me the impression that I'm the one working with Park & Lazar in here and just Adler watching us like chess pieces he's moving.

Suddenly, I started to hear some footsteps coming from the dorm and I stopped myself to work, wanting to know who it was.

"Bell ?" It was Lazar himself, dressed back in his normal clothes...wearing his favorite 'Burger Town' shirt. "What are you doing here ?" He asked as he moved near my desk

"Working." I replied in a very low voice, sounding just tired as hell.

"You work at 3 AM ?" He raised an eyebrow, putting his hands on my desk. "Seriously, you're telling me you're working at 3 AM ?" I nodded to him slowly.

"Adler asked me to work and I don't know why but I agreed to it." I fully responded, getting some papers back in place with my hands. "Been working since 10 PM on it." I looked away to the coffee machine direction. "Coffee helped to stay up."

"You're putting your work before your health ?" He moved to get sit on Park's chair.

"No but....there's something that Adler has on me....like he's controlling me." I suggested, making Lazar raising an eyebrow "I have....some sort of things telling me that....Adler is dangerous with me."

"We all think of it but we can't tell it loudly, Bell !" He told me with an grin, tapping on my left shoulder "Anyway, you should really get some sleep." He proposed me.

"I don't know..." I put my eyes on the papers I just put back in place. "Why are you awake too ?" I asked him back.

"Oh, couldn't sleep and also because someone was maybe using the coffee machine." He scoffed, making me laugh a little after all these times, him doing it too. "Wanted to know who was the mysterious person who was maybe already preparing us breakfast."

"Guess you got your answer now." I said with a funny tone before looking at him who was looking, curious.

"How's things with Park ?" He questioned me, his left arm on the desk, the other on his legs

"Pretty good for the moment." I started, looking at her desk that was just next to mine. "She's happy with me and I'm happy with her....if we don't count Adler stupid mind." I pointed at my nose. "He punched me after I taunted him about his life, prick wanted me to stop my relation with Park."

"At least, you proved him that you can stand against him." He crossed him arms, leaning back on Park's seat. "I wish that sometimes, I can punch Adler in his teeth....just for once."

"Maybe you will have a chance someday." I claimed before he decided to go up from his seat.

"You're sure that you don't want to go to sleep ?" He asked and I shook my head.

"No, I will be fine." I replied before....suddenly, everything goes to black all around me, I wasn't passing out but everything around me except Lazar was disappearing and I stood up by shock, looking at my hands, trembling.

"Yirina ?" It was Lazar's voice and I looked at him, now wearing his combat suit....the same one from Cuba. "Yirina, promise me." He added, saying my real name.

"Laz' ?" It wasn't me as Bell anymore....something was very wrong in here, I wasn't in that memory anymore before I looked at Lazar with shock and stress in me.....

"Do it for me....take care of Park !"

I immediately woke up with an start inside the plane, sweating by a lot by the memory I just got back....focused on a talk I had with Lazar. I was so troubled, trembling because of it. Since we had to go to Cuba, it's maybe sure that I was going to freak out. When I woke up, Garrett was sleeping and it was 11:30 PM meaning that we will arrive in Havana in 30 minutes. I decided to go directly in the plane private bathroom to get some water on my face to calm myself down.

I looked myself in the mirror, thinking about Lazar....about what happened to Cuba, the disaster the CIA is calling an operation.....and also about me : How I'm still alive after what happened to me ? I looked at my head, at my scar, wondering about how Adler even if he's an monster wasn't able to see that he missed his shot against me on that cliff. Once I was finished after 10 minutes in the bathroom, I returned to my seat, awakening Garrett, alerting him of our soon-to-be arrival.

We arrived in Havana at exactly midnight in an MI6 clandestine runway near the city and soon that I got my feet on the ground that I was feeling weird in me....Cuba, here I was again ! I couldn't remember what happened 3 years ago when we first arrived in Cuba and honestly, I think it was better to think of something else instead of that. With Garrett, we took a car that was given to us and we were on our way to the temporary safehouse we will have : a small apartment in the Barrio Chino district of the city.

Honestly, even if I was no tired anymore and when we arrived in the apartment, I told directly Garrett that I needed more sleep before going to work and he understand, saying that we could only start work in the day. So, I immediatly go into the bed I first see and I was back to sleep again. I woke up later the next day, the May 6th at almost noon due to some Cuban traditional music from an radio in the apartment.

"How was the second round of sleeping ?" Garrett asked me as I stepped out from the bedroom, walking to the table where there were something to eat.

"Better than the first one." I replied, sitting down on a chair. This second round, like he said, wasn't so troubling for me and I didn't have anything that woke me up again. It was still strange to have sleep well in Cuba. "Anything new ?" I questioned him as he didn't go to sleep for the second time.

"I made some calls : we got to meet an 'concerned citizen' at the beginning of the night in a bar called 'Monserrate Bar'" He responded, looking outside the apartment at the streets as the table was just next to an window, I started eating something at the same time. "Since we know that Vargas is in an apartment located just at one street from the bar, it will be easy for us."

"So, it's just going to be us ?" He nodded to me

"The man that will help us will give some means to get to Vargas, don't worry. He's an long time friend of mine." He affirmed to me with an smile.

"You really had a lot of contacts like Park said." I scoffed, making him laugh

"Oh, I know a lot of people around the world." He said with an funny tone, looking at me with wide eyes. "Can say that I'm the friendly MI6 agent know by a lot."

"Helping us by an lot." I admitted before I looked at the satellite phone on the table. "Uhm...Park told me to call her, can I ?"

"Of course, just finish to eat and then, you can call her." He smiled at me, putting the phone just next to me.

I finished to eat my breakfast and then, once I was done, I took the phone and I decided to go back into my private room, sitting in the bed before I started to compose the number of Park's satellite phone slowly because I didn't want to make an mistake in it. I breathed as I composed the very last number before I put the phone near my right ear, awaiting for her to respond to me.

"Helen Park !" I heard her voice through the phone and it relieved me in the inside, pleased to hear her voice, she was very fast to respond.

"It's me." I told her in a low voice.

"Oh, Yiri !" She exclaimed, sounding happy too. "It's so good to hear your voice."

"Can say the same by an lot, Park." I said, looking throught the window of my room. "We arrived in Cuba hours ago but I fell asleep again, I'm sorry for the late."

"It's okay, you called me right ?" She affirmed to me, making me smile. "Which time is it in Havana ?"

"It's noon and it's very sunny." I replied, sounding good, changing from the rainy weather from Berlin time to time. "And you ?"

"Almost time to eat diner and in here...it's mixed between sunny and raining." She scoffed at the end, making me laugh. "So...uhm....how do you feel ?" She asked me, worried

"Well, it's strange to be back here." I responded, taking a sad tone in me. "I...I had an memory with Lazar and it's very troubling." I added, still sad.

"Can...can you explain it to me ?" She questioned me, hearing her getting redressed somewhere.

"It was during an night in the safehouse where he found me at my desk working late at 3 AM but then....something strange happened." I started, my voice almost cracking from telling it. "I was like in a black void with Lazar....talking to me with my real name and he asked me something."

"What did Lazar asked ?" She was sounding worried and curious.

"He asked me to take care of you." I replied in a low voice, moving to face the ceilling. "It's what he asked me to do and that's I want to do : taking care of you." I added, mixed between sadness and sure of my words. "Park, I want to stay with you, to be with you."

"I know, me too." She affirmed. "I'm so sorry that I wasn't able to come with you." Her voice was also cracking about it. "I know that you're in good hands with Garrett."

"Yes, I am." I breathed, looking at the closed door of my room. "Park, I will come back very soon to you."

"Yiri, you will, don't worry !" She admitted before I could hear her sniff. "I will never let you down, be sure of it."

"Thanks Park." I whispered, feeling a tear on my face that I cleaned with my free hand. "We will maybe come back for tomorrow....back to you."

"It's good to hear." She said with an better voice. "Everything will be fine, Yirina !"

"I know, I will do my best for you."

"Listen, I have to go eat and then have some rest for my arm and if you're fast enough, you can get back to me when I woke up next morning, you will be my surprise." She informed, meaning that it was the end of the call, I wanted to last more longer but work needs to be done and I prefer to let her rest.

"I will try my best, Park." I told her, redressing myself to get back on sitting on the bed's edge. "Love you 3000." I added.

"Love you 3000 too, Yiri. Come back quick." She exclaimed before the line went shut, leaving me just alone in my room.

I was so much happy to have hear her voice but sad because she wasn't there with me, probably in our bed in the safehouse at West-Berlin. Once the call was finished, I stayed on the bed, holding the phone in my hands, feeling some tears on my face while smiling with joice.....

I will take care of you for the rest of my life, Park !

[itsmoonphobic]

Moonbow at it yet again with a new Mcyt AU-But like what else am I supposed to do?I got so much positive feedback for my royalty AU that I decided to come up with a new AU! Plus I binged all the Ocean's movies and like the main one that inspired me was Ocean's 8,that movie slaps!If you haven't watched it yet you definitely should!!Anyway-Like I said my family and I just moved and I'm getting an extreme haircut today(lmao) so I'm pretty busy but don't worry the first chapter of "Royal Buisness" is going to be out in a few weeks/months!!Love u all and hope u like it <3💤💙

📷Target Spotted💻 (Mcyt Spy AU)

Sleepyboisinc(S.B.I) -> my absolute favorite bois ♡

-The sleepyboisinc originally started of as a joke.A few five year olds have the dream of becoming secret agents and start their own Buisness.

-No one really took it seriously back in the days when the three boys would draw and write down ideas for advanced technology devices and gadgets,I mean c'mon it's only natural for kids to grow up with dreams.The childish roleplaying on the playground eventually stopped but the dream stayed.Everyone simply thought that the trio would forget about their ideas in a few years and "grow up".

-Well they were wrong.Nobody could have predicted that the three of them continued with their "shenanigans" through all of their years in highschool-

-Techno,Phil and Wilbur stayed in touch while growing up. The three of them developed such a stron brotherly bond that at some point they left out everyone else and only shared their time with eachother.Their families informed them that they should be more open and extroverted but the three of them are stubborn.

-Time skip to College.Techno went on to study Psychology and English,Wilbur went to start a musical career and Phil- he just kinda disappeared?He didn't tell them where he went to college or what he was doing after school.

-So after two years of somewhat going their separate ways and two years of Phil missing without a single trace,both Techno and Wilbur decide to meet up and look for him. What the two didn't expect is that that night their childhood dream would become reality.

-Turns out that Phil,during those two years,secretly developed the S.B.I foundation.Techno and Wilbur couldn't believe that he managed to do all of this by himself and honestly?They were more than impressed and happy.It was their life long dream afterall and the fact that Phil made it all possible was absolutely overwhelming and appreciated.

-Phil explained everything.He told them that he didn't expect it to actually turn out this good and work functionality but it did!Phil also didn't accomplish it by himself but he hired a few poeple they could use on their side.At this point Techno and Wilbur were even more in love with their new jobs that they immediately dropped out of their previous occupations.

-He showed them around and the two of them were awestruck.Phil couldn't help but smile and laugh at their reactions since he only expected it to be this way.Phil didn't have to show them how things work becouse they created and designed all of this together,Phil was only the one who made it reality.

-Everything looked like from their drawings.The whole aesthetic of the building the S.B.I was located in was amazing.The outside looked like nothing special,and that's the way it's supposed to be.People weren't ment to get suspicious and curious.So making it look like a simple buisness was perfect.

-The only thing Techno and Wilbur weren't familiar with was the new staff so Phil gladly introduced them to eachother! Techno could already tell that there are a few poeple who he clearly won't get along with aswell as people he sees himself working with quite okay.As Phil watched them interacting he couldn't help the wide smile forming on his lips: The sleepy bois are finally reunited :)

Techno N.(Blade):

Techno is one of the best if not the best spy and the one with the biggest amount of action going on.His loyalty and dedication to his job are insane.Even back when they were kids Techno was always the one to stick up for Phil and Wilbur and make sure that the kids who bully them never show their faces again.

Techno is tough and clever.He thinks before he acts.His movements aren't exactly the most precise ones but they are definitely swift.Not to mention that there are times where instead of intimidating the target into getting out the information they need Techno turns to violence.He does apologize for it afterwards though so it's chill.

Techno is a professional at his finest.Getting caught?Never. Messing up?Not Techno.Tricks or traps?Don't work- During his training arc Techno learned the ways of a spy in and out. When Techno wants something to happen or go his way he only focuses on said thing and leaves it aside once he achieves what he wanted.

Techno prefers to work alone,he is extremely shy and introverted so it isn't easy working with people he's not comfortable around or familiar with.His social anxiety is not really a big help either- (Protect him) Another fun fact is that Techno's ADHD makes him struggle with his big focus ability.But everyone in the company knows it and they know that he can't do anything about it. •Accepting friends am I right? :)

Techno is the only employee that Phil let's in on the biggest news and insights first(Apart from Wilbur) and he is also the only one he trusts with the more dangerous weapons.Techno is really good with those!

Techno's missions are the ones that mostly need to be taken care of at night-His sleeping schedule is messed up so Phil gave him the night shift.Of course Phil has days where he strictly tells Techno to take them off so he can take care of his health and sleep.Techno refuses but knows that it makes Phil happy so he takes days off for him (I love their relationship <3)

Techno's job is his number one priority.Due to the fact that he used to study and specialize in psychology as well as in English and it's History Techno is very smart. His intelligence and usage of certain words tend to confuse other people and Techno would do it on purpose just to see the expression on their faces.

May I add that Techno is very calm and sarcastic.He also tends to be very polite and cold which makes poeple uncomfortable sometimes.His ego and confidence are both massive aswell which has it's ups and downs!

Techno is really good in cartography(Maps).During highschool Techno unintentionally desroyed everyone in Geography.He didn't like the subject he was only a natural at it.(If you couldn't figure it out already I obviously had to put in an SMP Earth reference)

Techno is one hell of a pilot.Poeple seriously question themselves how he is so good at flying planes or helicopters.Why complain though?A talent like that could come in handy any time when needed.

Phil W.(1ZA):

The boss and founder of the Sleepyboisinc(S.B.I)

Phil was the one who made all of their childhood dreams come true,and he's very proud of how far he himself and his friends have come!

Phil goes on missions on very rare occasions.His main job is to stay in his office and make sure that things run smoothly and the way they are supposed to.

He counts and is known as the information center and the backup for his agents.Him going on missions is very risky since he always has to be available during everything.His main priority is that all of his agents and friends come back safely and most importantly alive from their jobs.

Becouse Phil is mostly stuck in his office busy with paper work,he can read his agents like an open book. Phil's ability to instantly make someone feel welcomed and loved can either be seen as comforting or scary.One look at you and Phil knows exactly what topics to talk about.He can't but choose to use that ability to his advantage.

Phil is a very caring and kind person.He is the definition of wholesome!S.B.I is pretty lucky to have such a understanding and nice boss to work with.

Phil tends to keep his eyes on the troublemakers(I will get to them later 👀)and Techno especially.The first one is pretty self explanatory since the nickname says it all.Techno on the other hand is in Phil's sight not becouse he's a brainless idiot but of his health issues.

He is a very patient and empathetic person it isn't in his nature to be angry or mad at someone but when he is it gets scary.To have Phil actually mad it you,you would have to fuck up big time.Poeple who have experienced Phil being angry with them have nightmares till this day.He won't be violent and he won't insult you but he will hit you where it hurts the most,he will fo under the deepest parts of your skin. (Not physically but mentally)

Phil knows the right time to be serious and the right time to have fun and joke around with his friends.After a successful mission the crew would go out and celebrate their victory.Phil has to make sure that all of his idiot agents don't get too drunk so that no laws will be broken and no unnecessary information will be spread around.Gotta keep up a good rep am I right?

Everyone in the company sees Phil as a big father figure.I mean who wouldn't?The vibes he gives of remind everyone of an overprotective dad.Whenever somebody of his agents has a problem their first instinct is to go and talk to Phil about them.Phil will gladly listen and cheer them up when he needs to <3

Wilbur S.(Dirty Crime Boy):

Wilbur is the S.B.I's decoy and undercover specialist. His biggest flex is that becouse he is so handsome and charming,Phil decided to let him be the distraction. This guy could flirt with anyone and he would have them wrapped around his finger in no time.

There is just something so exciting and addictive to taking on different personalities and outfits.Wilbur can pull out any look or personality trait.His favorite one would have to be a musician,he doesn't have to act around too much since he's in his natural habitat. Wilbur sometimes has way too much fun with his job.

There are times where Wilbur is asked to perform somewhere so that Techno or whoever is on a mission with him is able to do what they need to do.He will get caught up in the moment and forget that he is on a mission so when Phil tells Wilbur's partner to drag him off stage and calm him down they immediately do so.

Apart from that,Wilbur is extremely good at what he does.You know those guys in movies who will drug other poeple's drinks and stuff to either rob them or drag them someplace else?Yeah that guy is Wilbur. His suave attitude and velvety voice makes everyone want to have a drink with him :)

Wilbur has the power of blackmailing on his side.This guy knows everything about everyone.You smoked weed with your ex on a highschool party?Wilbur knows it all.Some shit you did when you were home alone three weeks ago?Wilbur has all the details.He knows so much shit that people who work with him are genuinely scared to get close to him just couse they fear that he will know all their secrets.

Somehow Wilbur is able to get any information that is required for a certain mission.Your grandma's name?Blood type?Favorite type of cacti?Wilbur has it all memorized in his head.Phil may have all the needed information but Wil has the dirty secrets and past shit someone has gotten themselves into.

Wilbur's favorite person to work with has to be Techno.Not only becouse of their brotherly bond but becouse Wil knows that if he's stuck somewhere Techno is always around and will get him out.Wil simply enjoys Techno's company,he doesn't talk much so it gives Wilbur enough time and silence to talk about his day or something stupid that pissed him off.

Becouse Wilbur has to work undercover and make sure that he doesn't get recognized,he is fluent in multiple languages,his most requested ones are: German,French and Spanish!!(My personal headcanon I know Wilbur doesn't speak all three of them fluently)

Wilbur is the one who gets send onto missions that require to travel to a different country.Most of the time Wilbur happily agrees but on rare occasions where he feels as if something might go wrong or when he has a bad feeling about some place he will desperately try and get Phil to send someone else.

Tommy S.(Innit) ->Proud Inniter btw <3

Sixteen years old and already a spy?Tommy is living the dream of surely everybody in his highschool.Being light and quick on his feet Tommy's job is sneaking in and pickpocketing.Need a unique antique located in a safely secured safe?Tommy's got you.A wallet with a credit card or ID?Tommy already has it.Maybe it's a watch or a jewelry piece?It's Tommy's now.

Tommy's outgoing and energetic personality is a huge boost to the company.Whenever an agent backs down from a mission,Tommy will immediately call them out for being a coward.Tommy has the mouth of a sailor so him calling you a piss baby or bitch boy is completely normal to everybody working in S.B.I

They are pretty much used to it that Tommy has no filter when it comes to his opinion on something.He is brutally honest and isn't afraid to call you out for you bullshit.Tommy can be a little too open minded from time to time which gets him into dumb situations.

Tommy has the stupid ability to make everyone hate him the moment they meet him.Tommy tends to start fights or arguments against multiple people who are way stronger and taller than him.He doesn't think before he acts and just dives head in.

Almost 99.9% of the complaints Phil receives from other companies or his familiars are from Tommy.Even though Tommy promises Phil to stay out of trouble and keep his attitude to himself,he still manages to break those promises the moment someone insults his friends or makes fun of him.Phil seriously needs to teach him some proper manners-

"The business bay" is a small alliance that Tommy has formed in S.B.I,long story short it's all the younger agents (Tommy,Toby,Bitzel,Deo and Luke)in the company working together in a group.(Mostly just becouse all four of them go to the same School and Tommy needs people to steal homework from-)

Tommy seeks attention and admiration in any shape or form.Call him an "Alpha male" and you've got your name secured on "Keep them safe" list.The only other person Tommy admires,apart from himself is Techno. Literally the smallest "good job" or "well done" sends Tommy's ego over the edge.He will brag to everybody who is stupid enough to listen to him.He will constantly try and impress Techno in any way,which ends up in Tommy getting too ahead of himself and getting embarrassed for being so clumsy.

Wilbur and Tommy have a wierd relationship.One minute they are normally interacting with eachother and the other they are trying to kill eachother.Tommy complains about Wilbur all the time,about how annoying he is and that he thinks that he's best- Though when it comes to having eachother's backs that rivalry is put aside and they work together to save both of their asses.

Neither Techno or Wilbur will admit it but when Phil sends either of them to get Tommy's ass out of some shit he has gotten himself into the two of them are worried and get very protective over him.Sure Techno teases and ignores Tommy to no end and Wilbur annoys the living shit out of him but both of them make sure to take care of Tommy like their little bro.

AHHHHH IT'S FINISHED!!ANOTHER AU HAS BEEN WRITTEN QJSJWKKQ-Sorry guys I'm very excited about this AU,I have been working on it for a few days now and I had to write down all my headcanons and ideas!Don't worry my royal AU is still a work in progress so keep in mind that the first chapter will come out soon!I hope you guys enjoyed my Spy AU and ofcourse any kind of feedback is welcomed! Love u all <3 <3

[punkscowardschampions]

Carly & Ali

Carly: heard from drew? Carly: long shot Ali: Ha, good one Carls Ali: God no Ali: he's AWOL? Carly: yea Carly: gimme calebs number? Carly: longer shot Ali: 'Course but doubt they're chillin' Ali: and he might act like saying his name invokes him to pop up like a demon but you know Ali: Have you spoken to Meena? Surely he's keeping her in the loop Carly: shes not picking up Carly: to me Carly: same as my mum and dad Ali: That's not like her, she's probably just busy, keep trying Ali: As for your 'rents, where have they gone? And why do you need Drew so urgent? Gah, sorry, so many questions Ali: Just go with this one, are you okay? Carly: ive been trying ages Carly: shes not on spanish time idk why she cant answer Carly: idk wot to do Carly: how do i get it to stop ?? Ali: Spain's only an hour ahead of us anyway, not an excuse Ali: I'm 8 hours ahead and I've managed Ali: get what to stop babe Carly: the crying Carly: i cant think Carly: its all it does Ali: You've had the baby Ali: how long ago? did you go to the hospital? you need to if you haven't, like now Carly: what Carly: why would i go there Carly: its over with Ali: Because you both need to be checked over Ali: its really important Ali: have you birthed the placenta? Is it all out? If not you could die Ali: Never mind if there's anything wrong with the baby Ali: Call a cab and give me your deets, I'll transfer the money now Carly: that alien shit Carly: yea Carly: it screams healthy Ali: that is a good sign but there could be something you're missing, maybe that's why its screaming? better safe than sorry, they're not allowed to ask you about shit unrelated, so if you're high, sober up and then go, yeah? Ali: When did you last do a feed? Have you been able to? They'll show you how, it can be tricky Carly: id scream if i was born here Carly: gonna be stuck Carly: sober up? i need more Carly: shit hurts dont need to tell you Ali: They'll give you stuff at the Hospital Ali: why do you think anyone goes? Ali: and fo free baby gurl! please Carly: i cant Carly: gotta be hear for when my mum rings back Carly: & drew might come Ali: Give me your mums number and I'll tell her where you are Ali: then she can ring the hospital and they'll let you know Ali: I bet Drew has a key, no? Ali: Leave a note Carly: he left it when he went Carly: threw it at me Ali: Oh bab Ali: I'm sorry Ali: but you gotta focus on you Ali: and the baby now Ali: Not him, he knows where you are Ali: I can text him if you want, or try to call Ali: I swear nothing bad will come out of it Carly: but its his Carly: and i am Carly: he should be here Ali: But he isn't Ali: maybe he'll come back but you gotta keep going 'til he does, alright? Carly: i need to find him Ali: Not right now Ali: next step Ali: he's not lost, he doesn't want to be found Ali: i know that's harsh but its the truth Ali: he'll come back when he's ready, alright? Carly: what about me Carly: im not ready Carly: he doesnt care Carly: why should i Ali: he cares about himself Ali: AT LEAST do that Ali: if you can't the baby then the people at the hospital will help with that too Ali: you can't just leave it Ali: boy or girl? Carly: its a girl Carly: another one Carly: hes gonna be mad Ali: I don't think he's salty about not having a male heir babe Ali: If you really won't go...I'll do my best to tell you what I know and I'll send you links Ali: we'll do our best health check and then you've got to try to feed her, yeah? Is that okay? Carly: mad that shes here Carly: i said i wasnt having one Carly: you want me to read? cant hear myself think Ali: But you were Ali: and if you were doing it without protection then he was fully aware it was a possibility Ali: I'll voice memo you then Ali: it'll stop the crying Carly: he says its not his Carly: maybe not Carly: idk Carly: its got blood on it but could look like him when thats gone Ali: He said that to me when it definitely was so kind of his go to Ali: but even if it isn't, doesn't mean he has to be a dick to you about it Ali: Its not right regardless Ali: Especially not when you're alone Carly: how do i make it sleep Carly: im tired Carly: should i sing? Ali: That might help yeah Ali: Skin to skin to, that's comforting Ali: Lemme break down how you feed it, yeah? Hold on Carly: i cant pick it up what if i drop it fuck no Carly: gotta stay where it is Ali: You won't Ali: its your baby, its safer with you than it is on the floor Ali: get a towel, that'll keep it warm and put it to your chest Ali: [Sends 38 sec video] okay, if that's easier this vid shows you how but I'm here to talk you through Carly: all the towels are wet Carly: it can have my tshirt thats warm Ali: Good idea, see Ali: you know what you're doing Ali: you've got this Carly: its too small Carly: i have to put it back down Carly: ill hurt it Carly: fuming about me coming near it Ali: She's just hungry and confused Ali: Understandable, right? Dunno about you but I'd be pretty fucked off too if I'd just been pushed out my nice comfy home of the last 9 months Ali: You'll be her best friend in my time at all Carly: id put it back if i could Carly: whyd you wanna do this 3 times Ali: 'Cos I'm a bossy bitch and I want underlings to do my bidding and I get to tell 'em what to do Ali: speaking of, time for your masterclass Ali: get her and get comfy on the sofa or your bed or wherever is bed Ali: best Carly: k Carly: shes heavy wtf Ali: That's good! You did a good job cooking her then Ali: and if she's a lil chunk, this should be easier Carly: shes small but im sleepy Ali: you can both take a snooze when this is done, usually conks 'em right out Ali: is your tiddy out? Carly: knew you fancied me Ali: you know Ali: getting in there while your defenses are down Carly: im single Carly: you too Ali: Lets do it mama Ali: cutest fam ever? i think so Carly: shes not cute like yours Carly: weird coloured thing Ali: she's probably covered in the gunk and pink from screaming her head off Ali: no ones finest hour i bet she's beautiful Carly: ill get it to take a selfie Ali: yay! get it on the nip 'cos i gotta see my boo too 😍 Ali: line her nose up with your nip, kinda tickle her top lip with it, she should open her mouth wide Ali: then you can shove it in Carly: done that before Carly: weird Carly: [Sends pic of tiny baby Indie] Carly: does she look like him idk Ali: Definitely Ali: Looks a bit like Edie Carly: ill send him the pic Carly: probs should take a better one Carly: how do i look? Ali: Like you've just given birth Ali: so a goddess Ali: but a knackered one Carly: youve got a fetish Carly: cant trust that Ali: me??? Ali: didn't impregnate myself Ali: look at Caleb! Carly: and drew Carly: wont see him Ali: Clearly its his thing too Ali: but he's more about the before than after yeah Ali: he can't stay away forever Ali: he wouldn't leave Meena Carly: youre smart Carly: if i go there he cant avoid me Ali: Exactly Ali: Camp out Ali: Ana will help you with the baby shit if you like Carly: why Carly: she doesnt know me Ali: Because she's a good person Ali: plus she's a social worker, it what she do Ali: and she knows Drew better than most, she raised him Ali: worth a shot Carly: shes not his mum Carly: but she can take this kid Ali: yeah she's better than Ali: is that what you want? Ali: she'll discuss it with you, make sure you both get what's best Carly: im not talking to her Carly: she can take it or not Ali: No one will just take her with no questions asked Carls Ali: for your welfare and the kids Carly: im not answering a social workers questions Ali: They're not entitled to judge you Ali: She won't Ali: and as far as drugs are concerned, if you want to give the baby up then literally none of their business at all after that Ali: and if you did decide to keep her then they work with you Ali: they're not gonna just shop you, it ain't like that Carly: make me go to rehab is how its like Carly: fuck no Ali: They can't make you Ali: there's no point Ali: you can only get sober if that's what you want Carly: my mum and dad'll make me Carly: i know theyre gonna Ali: well, where the fuck are they now? Ali: if they're so concerned about you they'd be here Ali: actually supporting you Carly: theyll come when they find out about her Carly: i never told them Ali: Good, I hope they do Ali: but how did that happen Ali: how could I see and they didn't Ali: or Drew Carly: they dont come back Carly: drew did see thats why he left Ali: yeah but they must talk to you Ali: your mum has obviously been there how did she not clock something being up Ali: and not soon enough in Drew's case Carly: i call them if i need money Carly: they gotta think its why im calling now Ali: When do they call you? Carly: if i call and they didnt pick up Carly: unless theyre busy Ali: I see Ali: how's she doing? done feeding? Carly: sleeping Carly: how are yours? Ali: best feeling ever, right? Ali: much the same, its late here Ali: I'm pulling an all-nighter lowkey, finishing up some work Carly: i miss junie Carly: whatever your on for it gimme some Ali: i'd be creepy and snap him sleeping but no doubt the flash would wake his highness Ali: he misses you too, i'll get him to facetime Carly: aw Carly: go work bitch Carly: i shouldnt kept you this long Ali: don't be daft Ali: queen of multitasking Ali: and not just junie who misses you is it Ali: #massiveLESBIANcrush Carly: my tits are gonna go down Carly: snap me up now Ali: Trying, like Ali: make it facebook official Ali: that'll get the lads attention ey Ali: why else do it Carly: yea Carly: my parents too probs Carly: lapsed catholics Ali: be on the next plane over to get you back on the dick like Ali: i'll get on it #longdistancelesbians Ali: my ex gonna be so mad Carly: mine too Carly: wtf am i gonna do Carly: I dont want him to be an ex Ali: even though he's fucked you over like this? Carly: i fucked him over first Carly: i lied Ali: not really Ali: if anything, you lied to yourself Ali: but you didn't wanna hear it, couldn't Ali: and that makes sense Carly: cant block it out any more Carly: fuck Ali: it gets really real really fast Ali: doesn't it Ali: but you have got this Ali: i've got you, however i can, yeah? Carly: i dont want it to be Carly: i dont want it Carly: i cant do this Ali: okay, that's okay too Ali: but she isn't going to just go Ali: whether it was getting an abortion earlier or what you have to do now Ali: you have to do something Ali: there's no quick fix for it Ali: ana can get you in touch with the right people who will make it as easy as they can for you and her Ali: or my mum Carly: if i leave her she'll get found Carly: why does nobody ever call me back wtf Ali: Yeah but they'll still try to find you Ali: or Drew Ali: and his DNA will be on the system so Ali: and I reckon if they got to him, he'd sell you out Ali: when's the last time you slept? Carly: idk Carly: what day is it Ali: Tuesday Carly: sunday Carly: saturday Carly: idk Ali: fuck girl Ali: you shoulda been banking up on it before Carly: ha Carly: easy fix Carly: need my dealer Ali: not if your gonna be breastfeeding Ali: unless he gonna bring formula too Carly: i can go myself for that Carly: get a car Ali: you getting enough cash in, yeah? Carly: ha no Carly: no student loans for this bitch Ali: you'll have to look into getting help with that Ali: there's funds and shit, i'll find out the info Ali: that or tap Drew up for child maintenance Carly: yea cos hes declaring his earnings Carly: i wish hed talk to me Ali: exactly, bribe him like Ali: he's got a lot to lose Carly: hed never forgive me Carly: i cant Ali: but you can forgive him for all he does? Ali: got it bad honey Carly: yea Carly: its fucked Ali: is there anything he could do to make you stop loving him Carly: idk Carly: why Ali: cos you'd be happier if you didn't Ali: right Ali: like, he treats you like shit Carly: i wasnt happy before Carly: & he hasnt this whole time Carly: it got bad Carly: me too Ali: but you could be Ali: you don't have to give up hope of ever being Ali: and he did for the majority of the time though, that should outweigh the good Carly: with what Carly: this kid Carly: im not you Ali: no Ali: of being happy Ali: with just you Ali: or someone else who treats you better Carly: i dont have a job or friends here and i live in a caravan Carly: not gonna happen Ali: you can get both Ali: you're cool Carly: ha Carly: youre dreaming Carly: fucked the allnighter Ali: i'm not the only one Ali: and why not? Carly: drew says im a junkie Ali: what does he know Ali: and anyway, functioning junkie Ali: shits possible Carly: he knows me Carly: he loved me til i fucked it Ali: you haven't DONE anything Ali: a baby happened to you BOTH Ali: you're both reacting, right or wrong now, whatever Ali: and he probably still does but Ali: love ain't always enough Carly: why are you my friend? Ali: I said, you're cool Ali: funny, smart, nice, you already know i fancy you so no need to kiss arse any more, yeah? Ali: you're SO friendable, babe Carly: shoulda fallen for you Ali: yeah well, the tragedy of being straight and feelings not following logic Ali: sometimes, you gotta fuck feelings tho, do right by yourself Carly: i dont feel anything when he isnt here Carly: nothing happens Carly: cept today Ali: make stuff happen Ali: its only chaos darling Carly: youre not here either Carly: what am i gonna make happen on my own Carly: this shit Carly: idk Ali: what do you wanna make happen Ali: anything, however unlikely you think it is Carly: i want him to come back Carly: my parents too Carly: but none of them are Ali: can't control other people nah but you can do all YOU can to make it happen Ali: what would make him come back? who would he wanna be with? and you can try to talk to your 'rents and tell them what is up...longshot but maybe they don't realise how shitty they're being Carly: they're not Carly: theyre busy Carly: and im not a kid Ali: busy with what? Ali: living it up in spain? Ali: they kept you, you're their kid for life Ali: they don't get to peace at 16, 18 whatever the fuck Carly: they didnt vanish Carly: i know where they are Ali: yeah but they should be here rn Ali: you need them Ali: maybe if you ask, when they answer, they will come back Ali: i'm not slagging on 'em, its just facts Carly: i dont want to go live in spain Carly: fact is theyll try and force me Ali: well, they can't make ya, tell them why you wanna stay here Ali: they could still be supportive Ali: even if they're not physically with you every day like Carly: they wont let me stay for him Ali: okay...make something more parent friendly up then Ali: what they don't know won't hurt 'em Carly: youre so smart Ali: so i've been told Ali: with varying levels of sarcasm Carly: yea Carly: same Ali: You are though Ali: One of the many reasons we get along Carly: youre such a mum Carly: bigging me up like Ali: s'what i do best right Ali: shoulda been a cheerleader, fucking irish schools not letting me shine Carly: thats what schools do best Carly: be shit Ali: true dat Ali: even if my uni is pretty swish Ali: and full of nerds like me Carly: looks it Ali: still, miss the homeland like Carly: switch places Carly: shes crying again what does she want this time Carly: headfuck Ali: think its a bit too early for her to have shat, maybe wee but Ali: probably wanting her next feed Ali: you do it roughly every 2 hours for the first month Carly: ffs Carly: howd you get anything done with 3 of them Ali: ask myself the same question Ali: luckily they're not all on the tit 'cos form an orderly queue lads Carly: not getting my tit out again Ali: its that or formula run to get her to stop crying Carly: i cant put her in the car Carly: she'd fall out Ali: that solves that then honey Ali: get 'em out get 'em out get 'em out Carly: perv Ali: 🤷 Ali: single mum, gotta get my kicks where i can yo Carly: get fucked Carly: not offering Carly: one of the nerds would be up for it Ali: no need to tell me Ali: desperation station Ali: bless 'em Carly: do you go to class with your shoulders and knees out Ali: its boiling here, not even trying to be a shameless hussy Ali: can't be swooning erryday, got places to be, shitty bums to wipe Carly: yea Carly: cant steal that excuse myself Ali: sadly not Ali: can use breastfeeding though Ali: you're just out here feeding ya kid, looking hot as a by-product, fight me world Carly: don't Carly: how is this happening Carly: im looking at her and idk Ali: i can't believe you did it all by yourself Ali: you're a right tough nut Ali: but you don't have to keep doing it alone Carly: but i have to do something Carly: wtf Ali: yeah, keep both of yas alive until you figure out your next step Carly: make it sound simple Ali: 'course Ali: i'll allow you some melodrama but i can't claim hormones as hard Carly: u can Carly: and homesickness Ali: alright, lets have a good sob Carly: this kids done enough Carly: has you beat bitch Ali: rude Ali: already winning fresh out the womb Carly: what you naming it Carly: said you would Ali: you're serious? Carly: idc Ali: probs think on that a bit longer, whether you wanna name her or nah Ali: but my lists be ready don't fret Carly: k

[auskultu]

Yardbird Jimmy Page says, 'Open Your Mind'

Hit Parader magazine: WHEN YOU were a session man, were you playing bass or lead guitar?

Jim: Lead guitar.

HP: Was it difficult to switch to bass when you joined the Yardbirds?

Jim: It was at first because I tended to play it like a guitar. With the bass you just play a sort of root thing. I was just leaping around all over the place with great speed and I had to stop doing that. I managed to simplify it. But at first I was playing far too quickly.

HP: I read somewhere that you were going to play lead soon?

Jim: I already have because Jeff was taken ill. Chris took over bass.

HP: Who were some of the other people you have accompanied?

Jim: Them, the Kinks, Georgie Fame, I did some stuff for the Rolling Stones. Actually, we just did a lot of things for fun for Andrew Oldham. In fact, it really was good fun. But I've never been on any of their records. I was on the Who stuff. Petula Clark, P.J. Proby. Nearly everybody who didn't have their own backup group.

HP: How would you describe your style of guitar playing?

Jim: My style has always been very similar to Jeff Beck's. We knew each other for about 9 years. We've always liked the same music and we had the same tastes. As a result, it's been quite easy to fill in for him. When we get the two lead guitars going, it should be pretty good. Because it'll be like two identical people playing together.

HP: What's your opinion of the Paul Butterfield Blues Band?

Jim: I haven't seen them live. But their album is pretty good. As a harp player, Butterfield is really great. He's better than anybody in England. Lots of people speak of Mike Bloomfield, but there are a lot of guys in England who play that stuff.

HP: Beck is an excellent guitarist, but why isn't more of his solo work heard on records?

Jim: How far can you go? We've been told our latest album is too far advanced. There's too much electronic stuff on it. But I think it's all basic. We cut a single with Jeff. It's a Bolero thing. It's very exciting and strange. It's either going to be a monster or a bomb. It's an instrumental based on the classical Bolero piece. Beck's guitar-playing is exploited quite a bit there. But how much can you do that the public will accept? You either make a commercial record or a musicians' record. You've got to draw the line somewhere.

HP: Are there some good blues bands in England?

Jim: There's one called John Mayall's Blues Breakers. Mayall himself is terrible. And then Eric Clapton is good, but he's in the Mike Bloomfield bag, and that's that. And there are lots of good guitarists in minor bands.

HP: Would you say blues is still a big rage in England?

Jim: No, not really. It's still got a market; it's the same thing as in America.

HP: Are you basically a blues guitarist?

Jim: Before the Indian thing was exploited, everyone said I played like an Indian. Mainly because I was interested in the music so many years back. I had the albums and I sent to India for a sitar. I had one long before George Harrison. I tried to learn the actual classical music. It's very difficult. There are so many sides to it. I tried to adapt that to my guitar playing.

HP: Why have musicians latched on to these Indian sounds?

Jim: Because it's so esoteric. Everybody thinks they understand. They get a new sound and they say this is it. But really, they don't know what's going on, I'm sure. I've heard people in groups playing sitars and they don't know what's going on. They don't even tune them up right. Apparently, George Harrison has become deeply interested in it. He plays a sitar on their new album and he was getting along very well. People like Brian Jones just got it for the one record and I doubt if they'll ever use it again.

HP: There are a lot of Indians living in London, aren't there?

Jim: Yes, there are quite a few. Strangely enough, when you speak to them of Indian music, they don't seem to know anything about it. The only thing they know is the western music or the Indian film music, which is completely different from the classical. When you ask them about it, they recommend you to the Asian society or something. I met Ravi Shankar and that's how I got my information on how to tune up the sitar.

HP: Will you be writing material for the Yardbirds now?

Jim: With them, not for them. When one of us has an idea, we all chip in on it until it's finished. I wasn't on the last two, but 'Shapes of Things' and 'Over, Under, Sideways, Down' were all made up in the studio.

HP: What kind of equipment do you use?

Jim: When Chris is on rhythm guitar, we use any old amplifier because it isn't that important, but on bass we have a big set-up with 2 or 3 speakers.

On this tour, we've been given Jordan equipment. It's all transistorized equipment. We're sort of experimenting with it. It hasn't worked out properly on the lead guitars. But it's been sufficient on the bass. On bass, we've got 6 speakers to 8 speakers. In England I've been using a Showman Fender amplifier. And a Fender concert amp which is a smaller one with 4 ten-inch speakers. I link them up together so I get double the power. Through one you get the bass frequencies and through the other I use feedback and the treble frequencies. This is about the best set-up I've had so far. But Jordan is working on some new equipment which should prove to be great. I play a Gibson Les Paul guitar, Chris has an Epiphone bass and there's another Gibson floating around. Eventually, it will be all Gibson because we bought them and never bothered to change them. They're quite adequate.

HP: How did you finally end up with the equipment you've got now?

Jim: We just worked on it. I've been playing guitar for a few years now and I just work on this certain line. You do as best you can. The only problem being we blow up quite a few amps. We did one show and I had 4 amplifiers all linked up. It must have been about 400 watts all together. Those were Vox amps. They just can't take the volume. The speakers blow and then you don't get any sound at all. The Jordan ones didn't blow up, but they don't have enough volume. I've never broken a guitar, but I've been through nearly every make. I've never found a guitar which is exactly what I want. At the moment, I'm happy with this Gibson. I've also got a Fender Telecaster. I find every guitar's got a sound of its own and you can use them all and get something out of them. I haven't used the Telecaster on stage yet. Actually, all my guitars are in England because I came over playing bass. I switched to Jeff's guitar. His is very close to mine because they're both Les Paul models. Normally, we all travel by plane and the equipment goes by van. We have two road managers, one for the equipment and one for us.

HP: Have you found a big difference in British youth and American youth?

Jim: The Americans are a little more narrow-minded. The English, at the moment, are completely broad-minded. This wasn't the original concept of the English, was it? You can shock people in America very easily. If people are shocked, that's their bad luck. They should open their minds. In England, you could walk around in the nude and you wouldn't shock anyone. They'd think you should be put away, but they wouldn't beat the guts out of you. Also, the age of consent is 16. You can marry at 16. The attitude over there is completely free, just like the attitude toward clothes.

HP: Are you really that concerned about how you look?

Jim: I'm not really concerned with clothes. People put that on my shoulders. In actual fact, I'm pleased to see people walking around in outrageous things. They're throwing off the chains of a society that was. It's probably making England completely decadent, but so what. Billy Graham was just over there in England and if you walked around with him, you'd have seen it look all pretty decadent. I'd have to agree. He didn't make any impact at all. Actually, it's a forecast of the end of society. But I don't care because I'll be dead before it ends. If we've come this far in five years, it should really be something in another five. I'd like the new society to be a peaceful one but it won't be, because violence seems to be the answer to every problem. Every fringe society must be experiencing this. We walk around with long hair and someone shouts something, so you give them an answer back which is a little sharp and which they don't quite expect. Then they can't give you an answer, so they come to fists. What sort of mentality is that? I can't argue with a person like that.

It must be terrible for someone to have to fight in a war. I haven't had to think about wars. It's just something I haven't had to contend with, really, I hadn't realized what a big problem it is. I've just seen the horrors of it.

HP: Well, England doesn't have any big thing going now.

Jim: No, this is it. We have no conscription whatsoever. I'll never be drafted or anything.

HP: They won't send you over to Africa to beat up some people or anything?

Jim: Well, they don't do this. People wouldn't do this. If they had a mass conscription now, I dread thinking how many people would go. Because it would only be 40% of those who would have gone before they dropped conscription. People don't want to know about it anymore. They think, well, why should I waste two years of my life and probably lose my life in the process. They just don't want to know anymore.

They've got a regular army where you join and you jet paid every week for doing it. And you just do maneuvers and things.

HP: They have that here, too!

Jim: Yeah, sure, but yours is more of a reality because they get drafted over to Viet Nam. Basically, I must be a coward, but I just couldn't shoot someone. I guess it's different if they're looking at you with a gun and you're looking at them with a gun. You'd have to do it, though. I'd just be violently sick afterwards. I'd never forgive myself, anyway. I'm not the sort of person who's the violent type. I've never never had a fight in my life. I've never put my fists up to anybody. I've never needed to. Only, as I say, through the long hair problem people have said things. But it's never developed. Even if you say come on then, they still won't do anything. Basically, they've still got no guts. But even if they did, I'd run a mile. It's funny because you think, well, what are they going to do, and they don't do anything. So they just wasted the whole time laughing at you. Perhaps they just laugh to reassure their own masculinity.

HP: Why do you think there's such a big concern with clothes?

Jim: I don't know. It's a projection of one's character, I suppose.

HP: Is Carnaby Street a real madhouse?

Jim: It's so easy to send that Carnaby Street thing up. It really is. It's really a street with lots and lots of clothing shops. It's quite a revelation if you've never seen anything like it before, and I'm sure nobody over here has. There's nothing like that. It's just teen-age fashions, bizarre styles. You go there on a Saturday and the kids are there spending money. This is all part of the game, I suppose. Yeah, they spend a fortune on clothes. I don't know where some of the young ones get it from. You see them walking around and they must have spent twice what they've earned.

HP: Do they have things like charge accounts over there?

Jim: No. Not on Carnaby Street, anyway. They won't take checks or anything, not from the kids. Not unless they know you. But there is a big leaning towards clothes and fashions. It's an extension of their character. People have become more aware of the fact that, if they dress up and they look really elegant, I'm not saying Carnaby Street, but if they've got a very clean-cut suit on and still look pretty hip with it and not just sort of middle class, it has the affect on a girl.

HP: What's the biggest thing you dislike about America?

Jim: You see, the only thing that I've seen is violence, but I've only been doing concerts. I don't get out to walk around and meet people very often. If I was walking around the street, I probably wouldn't see any violence whatsoever. So, it's difficult. You see, I haven't seen much of America on this tour. But, when I had my holidays before in Hollywood, I enjoyed it. I thought it was great.

HP: You spent your holiday in Los Angeles?

Jim: Before I joined the group, I spent my holidays for the last couple of years in Hollywood.

HP: What are some of the things you enjoyed in Hollywood?

Jim: The weather. The weather's pretty bad in England. I met quite a few people and made some good friends. I liked the Sunset Strip; there's quite a bit happening there. I got to see groups I could never see in England.

HP: If you had a choice, where would you like to live?

Jim: Miles away from anybody. That's what I'm going to do when I get back. I'm buying a house. It's about a half a mile from anybody else. It's got a river, five bedrooms. That's for when the group slows down a bit. But we'll be working hard for the next year. There's so many things I'd like to do that I don't have the time for now. Things which are very important to me, like painting. But it's best to work now and make all the money I can.

HP: What kind of books do you like to read?

Jim: I used to study religion when I was in art school. But I stopped.

HP: Was that how you got interested in Indian music?

Jim: It may have been subconsciously. But I didn't just read about it and then go onto it. At the moment, I read sort of very strange things like I, Jan Cramer. Things which are a social comment. This Cramer is a beat painter in Holland. I like Henry Miller, too.