#to the point where I've always been curious why there was never an effort for modding in the album versions of the ost

[toskarin]

on the note of mixing, it's really strange just how compressed FFXIV's soundtrack always is. I know some of it's down to clearing out air for pings to come through, some of it's down to filesize, but also it was startling the first time I heard the soundtrack CD mix of Equilibrium and realised how crushed the ingame version actually was

[meanbossart]

in the least confrontational way possible…what’s up with you shipping durge and orin? is it just another aspect of u liking fucked up dark dynamics in media? personally its not for me at all, but i’m curious why you like them together and how her dynamic is with ur durge

[CONTENT WARNING for mentions of inter generational incest and grooming below, nothing explicit.] Hm. You know, it's a little unfortunate that we have reduced every depiction of characters having a relationship that is at all romantic or sexual in nature (not even, really, I've only ever drawn them hugging LOL) as "shipping". I don't "like" them together in the way I like DU drow and Astarion together, for example, and they never really were together. I made up a story that I find interesting, because I find Orin interesting and wanted to explore her themes more, and liked the idea that hers and Durge's relationship wasn't always "bad".

I really enjoy writing for DU drow, I put a lot of effort into making his story feel fleshed out and suited for the in-game universe. It's a little disheartening that some people may harp on this without considering that there is a wider context beyond it just tickling me, somehow. These are two characters who've never even had sex, in which one of them (Orin) isn't even interested in romance or "mating", and the other one has no concept of healthy relationships, familial or otherwise and just desperately grasps at the one thing he feels a kinship to: to the eventual disintegration of the one relationship he had that approached anything to mutual understanding and relatability.

Theirs isn't a love story, it's a story about isolation and grooming that led to total dependency. If you've been told your whole life that everyone and everything is fated to die at your hand, that your kind is meant to be contained within a genetical crockpot, that debauchery is normalcy and everyone else is the enemy, it is no huge stretch that you would dump all expectations of companionship onto your one, supposed equal - friend, sister, mate, should-be-lover. And then, if you're a bad person on top of that, you won't take no for an answer.

Add to that that your grandfather (Sarevok) is apparently in total agreement and a practicant of the idea of inbreeding for weird purity purposes and you have yourself an environment where an obsession like such can be born - one that Orin wants nothing to do with, because unlike DU drow, she doesn't become distracted by matters of the heart - and hence we have conflict, and we have reason for resentment to brew over time. At some point in the past, they had a "good" (within the bhaalist concept) relationship, and there was nothing sexual or romantic about it. DU drow crushed that. And then he got a worm in his brain for it.

Is that shipping? 🤷 idk

If you go onto my blog's archive and look up the "orin the red" tag you can find more asks where I discuss them and their relationship.

[alicepao13]

Here we go again, Hudson and Rex S01E01!

God, I love 1080p.

Oh, Diesel. He's so young in this episode.

Okay, what is going on back there, the show has only just started lol

I forgot this show's only colors for S1 were blue and... blue. And some yellow.

Charlie in his suits. I could say I've missed it, but it gets old fast. You get more options with casual clothes.

Charlie verbally sparring with Mankiewicz is so good. I don't know why they didn't find more opportunities to get him back on the show, he's a good villain.

The part where Mankiewicz says Evelyn's name, I always thought that was intentional, judging by the way he looks up, like if he's waiting to see whether Charlie will pick up on it, which he does. He's probably judging his foe's intelligence.

Is it just me, or was John Reardon's voice even deeper in S1 (I remember I'd thought that before, it's not just this episode)? Or if not deeper, different somehow.

Rex displaying his intelligence as he "infiltrates" the bad guys' hideout. Also, I'm kinda curious about his screentime in this episode. If I'm right, it's significantly lower than other episodes.

I now remember than Kevin Hanchard had said he filmed all his scenes of S1 at the same time or something like that. I will be looking for hairstyle discrepancies lol

Ah, the old house. And Charlie looking at Rex's empty dog bed. And the first hints of whump as he's shot with a tranquilizer dart. I appreciated that.

Doesn't everyone get their forensics expert with them when looking for a missing kid?

Calm down, guys, it's the first episode.

Not much skill in the henchmen who had kidnapped Evelyn.

Hilariously, Sarah doesn't enter her lab once in the first episode.

I also do notice a not so subtle effort from direction/editing of making sure that Sarah gets in and out of the boat without Charlie's help, I guess they're making sure that Charlie is not doing any of chivalric things a man could do for his female coworker? He does later say that the perp should point the gun at him but it's after he's questioned from the woman herself and after Rex's timely takedown, Sarah is the one point the gun at the woman, while Charlie does the arrest.

Charlie hugging Rex after being separated from him for a whole day.

And Charlie shooting the guy, which apparently no one remembers lol

Jesse getting shot! More whump! I don't think anyone believed for a moment that he would die, though. Also, can someone shoot Charlie? I've been asking for years.

"He's not a dog, he's my partner". Ah, the corniness. I'll allow it.

The ending scene. I can clearly tell that John Reardon has some snack for Diesel in his hand after we've been shown the trick.

I honestly never thought that episode was a good pilot, not because of the quality of the episode itself, I consider it above average for S1. But you give the audience the wrong idea about how this show is going to be. Personally, upon my first watch, I was given the impression that Rex would be alone doing his own thing quite often. Also, it doesn't give the audience almost anything in terms of Charlie and Rex's partnership. And they promoted this show with lines like "good detectives, great partners", etc., focused on the partnership, which is the whole point of the show from its origins anyway.

[cornbake]

Headcanons of Grog, Pike, Scanlan, Percy, Vex, Keyleth, and Vax being surprised by their quiet friend because they didn't notice them at all! Said friend is just that quiet, not because they're being mischievous.

I've never done headcannons so I hope I did this right lmao ALSO I'M NOT DEAD. I sure feel like it lmao. Had a very long string of bad luck, as I'll put it, but thankfully it's gotten a little better. GROG - Grog is big and loud, two of his main characteristics. You where the exact opposite, small and quiet. - Despite being his opposite, Grog loved you dearly. In fact, he almost preferred it. If you were just like him you would only be his competition, which wouldn't work because he didn't want to hurt you. - Yet a problem tends to arise when he's a little to loud to hear his lingering shadow. - Most of the time it would take several tries before you could even get his attention. - "Oh! When did you get here?" - He would be a little shocked to hear you have been with him the whole time but would be glad to know you where here with him to cheer him on at his drinking games. PIKE

- Pike enjoys your company, it's so different from most of the others that it's nice to have some time with someone that's not nearly screaming every five minutes. - You both would sit to pray to your deities, many long nights together in silence. - At least that's how the nights usually went. Pike was a lot louder when it came to the day and the rest of Vox. - You can't blame her, her best friend is Grog after all. - So when someone as light footed as you happened to stick around the two cheerfully out spoken fighters it usually resulted in a screaming match, or a shriek if it was just Pike. - "Oh man! You sure got me good that time!!" - She found it more as a game, laughing it off with you. - You tend to make it your goal to keep spooking her as she tries to catch you before you can. SCANLAN - Much like his barbarian buddy he was loud and boy was he proud. - He loved to be in the spot light and loved all the attention from it. - You didn't mind that the spotlight was one him, at least it wasn't on you. - Anytime you did aproach him after a performance of his. He would have eyes and word on the others. Which might be why he didn't see you. - "Gah! Wha- How did you-? (Y/N)! You gotta stop sneaking up to me like that!" - You would just laugh and hand him a drink as he tries to stay grumpy at you, failing horribly. PERCY

- You preferred to stay in the shadows. Not for the same reasons as Vax but it was something that often made Percy feel unsettled. - He would try and cox you out into the light, as an attempt to show you it wasn't all that bad. Despite his efforts, he still found you stalking him and the party in the darker areas. - Even though he knew you were there he would always get a little spooked by your watchful gaze. It was never angry or sorrowful, but more curious and cautious. - He hoped you wouldn't use that to your advantage one day. Or at least not in the way the other would. - He can't tell you how many time he has nearly jumped out of his skin when he sees you. - "I'm going to have to get you a bell..." - "But then that would ruin the point of stealth." - "A bell for around the keep, or my hair will turn whiter than it is now." VEX - She was a hunter, a tracker, no one can out best her eyes. Well, maybe save her brother.... Okay, not even him. - She could see anyone or thing coming from a mile. From dragons to imps, nothing can get the jump on her. - Okay, MOSTLY nothing can get the jump on her. YOU on the other hand just seem to be able to sneak around her senses. - Getting an unexpected light tap on her shoulder was a shock to her, so much so she was ready for a fight. - Thankfully your friendly face was enough for her to lower her bow and take a moment. - "How on this green dirt did you get there?" - "Hmm? Oh! I just walked!" - "That's not- nevermind, what did you need darling?" - So maybe she can't track everything. But you are always a welcomed exception. KEYLETH - Keyleth herself was rather quiet, have moments of quiet to be with nature. - You often admired her Disney Princess like presence finding yourself watching her as she take her times of rest. - It was your moment of rest as much as it was hers, lasting as long as it took for her to spot you. - "AH! Oh! Hello! Oh my god, you scared me!" - "Oh- sorry Keyleth, just getting you to say dinner is made, wouldn't want Grog to take everything again now would we?" - Laughing she stood to make her way to the kitchen, telling you she'd save you a plate as you go to get the others. VAX - Vax, the one that kisses the shadows. HE is the one that sneaks up on people. Making them frighten for their lifes. - He dances with the night and dresses with the dark. - The rouge of Vox. The stealthy assassin. The one you see one second too late. - But that tends to not matter if he cant see what sneaks up on HIM. - He is honestly jealous that you got blessed with such a light foot. Might have to ask you for your secrets later. - Much like his sister he is ready to attack the unknown presences before he places an armed hand to his heart. - "My god feather, you've got to tell me next time you decide to follow me!" - He liked to call you feather after the first few times you happened to spook him. In his words, "You are as light as a feather, and just as pretty as one too."

[trillscienceofficer]

I've watched DS9 many times but I'm curious about how Kira sees Winn Adami in your opinion.

well I think Kira's opinion of Winn evolves a bit over the years, and to trace it more precisely I'd have to rewatch the Winn episodes but in general: I think Kira sees Winn as someone that would have points to make if only she didn't want to be in the limelight all the time.

I'm fairly sure Kira sees Winn's protagonism as a sort of betrayal of the spirit of what a Vedek (and then Kai) is supposed to be, an office of service to the Bajoran believers first and foremost. That's I think why Kira likes Bareil a lot more and supported his candidacy to Kai even though he seemed to be quite a bit more liberal than Kira is about theological matters. Bareil is just as humble and hard-working as Kira is, and it's a quality she respects in other people.

Then of course Kira's opinion of Winn gets worse and worse: she manages to steal the Kai's election by exploiting a secret that Bareil was keeping, she's ultimately responsible for Bareil's death and then Winn's terrible stint as Prime Minister. I didn't think anyone could come back from that series of events but it speaks to both the writing, which makes Winn if not sympathetic at least not so outwardly antagonistic after the events of "Rapture", and Kira's character that ultimately she still listens to Winn when she confesses in S7 that she's never actually heard the voice of the Prophets. I'm sure that must've been a 'that explains a lot' moment for Kira, but it's also another situation where the deep rift between how these two characters approach their roles comes out—when Kira tells her to step down (for her the only logical choice! you can't be Kai if you don't have the most basic mandate from the Prophets), Winn simply can't imagine not being at the centre of the efforts to keep Bajor safe, thereby also confirming the idea Kira's always had of her.

tl;dr I think they ultimately want the same thing (Bajor's independence and safety for the Bajoran population) but Kira is an effective leader for the same reason Winn isn't; Kira doesn't think of herself as that 'important' in what she knows is a collective and concerted effort (even back during the Resistance) while Winn always wants to be the protagonist, the one that signs treaties and delivers freedom to her people. And this difference creates a deep dislike between two women who would have otherwise understood each other a little more, I think.

[8bitsupervillain]

Higurashi When They Cry Hou Ch. 7 Minagoroshi pt. 6

I'm trying to remember if there's any character who is actually relevant to the overarching plot I haven't at some point accused of being an antagonistic force or working for whatever the big bad actually is. Keiichi, I don't think I've accused, because unless they're playing the long game he's too much of a boob to be an evil chessmaster. And Satoko, maybe? I'm pretty sure at some point I've pointed the finger at all of them.

The reason I say this is because looking at the text as written it's very clear to me that Hanyuu knows more about the circumstances around Rika's death than she's letting on. She knows the culprit, if nothing else. The why of it is something I can only speculate on. Perhaps in a different timeline Hanyuu let Rika know exactly who was behind her demise in 1983 and she attempted to take that person out but failed? You'd think though that at some point during the hundred years worth of reliving these events over and over again Rika would've tried relying on Irie, Takano, and Tomitake at a few times. I know that Hanyuu specifically says Rika tried once, but you would assume that if for no other reason than to test the variability of events she would've tried using them before.

Well I guess that would explain that away. It just strikes me as odd that despite living these hundred plus years she was only willing to try it once, and then never again. Especially since later on in the chapter she mentions that she feels a growing desperation to alter her fate in any way, shape or form. I guess it's really just because of the news that she is running out of Hanyuu's power to rewind time that she's trying out new methods?

Now, I don't want any confirmation either way, but it seems to me this is pretty deliberately setting up the idea that Takano is somehow behind Rika's death in June of 1983. It stops just a little short of outright accusing her directly, I would assume primarily because of the fact that how could she really be behind Rika's deaths since she always turns up dead before Rika? Takano has, in all the earlier chapters, wound up dead alongside Tomitake either on the night of Watanagashi or the very next day. Unless this is some elaborate red herring, the visual novel sure seems to be going to some effort to paint Takano as the culprit behind Rika's death.

See this makes me really curious what exactly Hanyuu is. Is she actually just the reincarnation of Oyashiro? Which, that would certainly do a real number on the theory put forth in Tsumihoroboshi. Or is she just some extraplanar entity, similar to the witches in Uminkeo? It's been mentioned a couple of times that Hanyuu has been alive for longer than she's known Rika so what exactly is she? I am totally willing to accept the idea that Hanyuu is Oyashiro, there's a moment coming up very shortly where she reacts rather negatively towards the theories Takano has about Oyashiro, the sacrifices and all of that. But it's just what exactly she is in the cosmology of the setting that stokes my curiosity. Another thing that I'm curious about is her usage of the word we. "All we want is a happy life for Rika." She's always just used the word I to describe herself, never we. So I can't help but wonder if there's some other entity like her keeping tabs on Rika.

Also, at risk of repeating myself I'm very certain that Hanyuu knows more about Rika's deaths. Certainly she's shown that she knows the how and the when it happens, but I think she also definitely knows who is behind it. I have the theory that she's just keeping the information to herself about who kills Rika away from her, most likely in a misguided attempt to keep her sane and alive as long as possible. Perhaps she knows that if she tells Rika "oh yeah, Jimmy's your killer." that Rika will just go and try to solve this time loop problem with violence. Or maybe I'm putting too much stock into this character and what she knows. But I get the impression when they reveal who's behind it all (probably by the end of this chapter), she'll just be standing there pretending to be shocked that it was actually whoever. Takano perhaps.

[pebblestar]

Raphael x reader

| Rottmnt ver |

• You hang around Raphael very often- Standing to one side of the giant turtle and most of the time you follow him around the lair and often watch him train.

• Ngl he probably doesn't notice at first. He probably just assumes that your curious of what he's doing.

• But when raph actually notices that you stick to his side (especially when he's not doing anything too important) He starts to get a bit confused.

• Then he becomes a bit worried that something might've happened.

• Are his brothers making you uncomfortable? Did you need something from him?

• but no... you seemed to just stand near him or rather sit someplace not too far away from him.

• While originally he'd thought his brothers had did something to make you uncomfortable, he realized that wasn't the case- Shell you'd hang around his brothers a good amount but maybe not as much as you hung around the turtle in red.

• It gets the point where a joke is made by Donnie; about how your like a baby chic who just so happened to imprint on the giant turtle because he was the closest.

• It was amusing to say the least but curiosity wins Raphael over and he decides to finally ask you

• "Why do you do that...?"

• "Huh?" You glance up from the book your reading, Noticing how he's looking at you with curiously.

• "Well your always followin me around... Are my brothers making you uncomfortable?"

• At that, you nervously look away from him before closing the book.

• "This is going to sound stupid, But... Your comforting to be around. You just.... radiate older brother vibes and since my brother and I don't get along uh well..."

• You trail off as you fidget with your hands.

"Sorry. That must be so weird to hear-"

• He's definitely tearing up at that

• You think of him as an older brother?!? Someone whose presence is incredibly comforting to be around???

• He feels so happy to hear you say that- And also relieved that his own brothers weren't bothering you either.

• Needless to say, He's quick to tell you that he doesn't mind you hanging around him at all.

• Also he's 100% supportive of what you do (not to say he wasn't before, but definitely ups the ante)

• Passing that test that you've been dreading?

• Or maybe you've finished working on a project you've been passionate about?

• Whatever it is Raphael will definitely let you know just how proud he is of you, Going as far to ruffle your hair with a grin or bringing you a celebratory snack.

• At one point you'd definitely start crying when he goes on to gush over the project you've been on for literal years- Since so many others have told you to quit or have shown disinterest, it honestly made you happy that someone was showing you that all the effort you've poured into this project hadn't been for nothing.

• You can bet he'll immediately comfort you, And while hesitant at first to hug you bc he's a big spikey turtle and your but a small human- The fear dissipates when you make the move to wrap your arms around raph in a tight hug.

• all in all, he's a good older brother figure who'll have your back no matter what ���

(( whew,,, ok I've never written for Rottmnt yet! so sorry if it's ooc- but I definitely want to try my hand writing more rottmnt going in the near future :]

[azrielgreen]

Hi! <3 I finally took some time this winter break to read Prism and it was absolutely incredible. I really appreciate the obvious amounts of time and effort that must've gone into creating such an intricate and heavy story. I think there's sometimes a tendency to portray victims of almost anything as blank slates and perfect, empty vessels of whatever trauma they've experienced. This never sits right with me so I really apreciate your dedication to creating such well rounded and devastatingly real characters.

It has been so so fascinating to spend some time in Steve's head and get to know some of his darker and more intense desires. They're kinda like snakes too sometimes, for Steve, I think. There's something almost equally serpentine to the things he wants and the things that make him feel good and safe. I just wanted to thank you both for taking things so deep and far with his character. Getting through those darkest days with him and ending up on the other side of it was a catharsis I've rarely experienced with fiction. All my love <3

I have a question, though! It's something I've been thinking about since reading that specific chapter and I can't get it out of my head. It seems that Eddie was very deliberate in getting Steve's fingerprints all over the drugs he later planted in Billy's car. I still can't quite figure out why this was so important to him. Hopper even mentions later that they're not persuing any drug related charges because he wants to keep Steve out of it. Wouldn't it have been much easier to get Billy out of the way if the cops could've pinned all the drug charges on him alone? I think Eddie must've known that Hopper would jump in to save Steve like that. Was he trying to clean his own hands from the drug related stuff as well? Was he worried that he would be implicated otherwise? I may have missed this explanation since there were some small parts I've skimmed for mental health reasons, but I was still very curious about this.

Looking forward to the new chapter!

I hope you have a lovely weekend <333

Oh, what an amazing and wonderful thing to share, thank you SO much!! We are so happy that people are resonating with parts of the story and I really do believe in and will always fight for the importance of catharsis through a controlled narrative frame.

To answer you Q, yes! This was very deliberate and Eddie's motives here are somewhat sneaky beyond "involving Steve", so at surface level, Steve's fingerprints being on the drugs means that firstly, Hopper would feel insanely protective of Steve (something Eddie anticipated way in advance, he knows more about Hopper than we realise at this point) and he would interfere to ensure Steve was kept out of it, and that Billy's whole thing was expedited under the table.

Secondly, it keeps Eddie's drug business untouched by official law. People would have asked where all that cocaine came from and Billy would have LOVED telling them, but to protect Steve, Eddie knew he would probably keep his mouth shut and go along.

Thirdly, and this I can only allude to vaguely, but Eddie doesn't really want Billy's case "air tight". He also wanted Hopper to bend the rules if not outright break them because a bent cop (albeit a good hearted one) is potentially useful to him down the road.

The thing here is that Eddie didn't really want Billy out of the way, he could have dispatched of him a long time ago much easier. It had to be Steve's choice (so Eddie thinks of it) and Steve's involvement and Steve's path. Eddie thinks of that whole encounter as having minimal interference from him, he's that delulu. It's also worth noting that Eddie, in somewhat terrifying fashion, has actual feelings for Billy, in a way a shark might have feelings for a human it sees swimming above on a surfboard. As we see in the previous chapter, he likes to set things up and have them ready (the order to kill Billy) but ultimately he can be quite mercurial. Eddie is not done with Billy and he's good at leaving doors half open, little opportunities to return to later if he so desires because he knows himself and anticipates his own desires way, way in advance.

I hope this was helpful! Prism is LONG and complex and if a small thing is mentioned and seems strange, it's usually done on purpose and will later be important so well done for noticing!

All my love, Az.

💜💜💜

[hollyhomburg]

how come you always write the mc as like .. bone skinny ? it’s a little unrealistic and i’m curious why there’s never any variety

i don't always write the m/c as bone skinny! in fact in many many cases i'm careful not to mention the m/c's body much at all beyond what she's wearing. ofal and call me yours are ones that i specifically made an effort not to characterize the m/c at all. In part because ✨fantasy✨ for ofal and because the call me yours m/c is obviously canonically blind. I think i even wrote a chubby m/c x tae fic at one point in time right? Sweet like honey break like glass? or something like that? i think the only fics in which it actually talks about the m/c being tiny are in the fics where it makes sense for the m/c's characterization- ie if she's a hybrid or a shifter of some sort.

however, part of my motivations in writing bily is to talk about my own experience with my eating disorder. She definitely toes the line between an y/n and an m/c in many many scenarios.

part of the reason why i think you might feel like i always write the m/c as being skinny is because i do really like to write size kink into many many of my fics, but i've been clear in a lot of them that tiny doesn't always mean skinny! especially when i think of like- DCIIH m/c- jiminie is definitely sized up in that fanfic. if you have to size up bts in your mind while you read my fanfics i encourage you to do that! and i often do that when i'm writing them! in my mind jimin is at least 6"1'

it's a fan fiction for a reason.

[avidaraku]

Hi!!!! ʕ •̀ o •́ ʔ

welcome to my pinned post I honestly still dont know what to do with my blog like ever but still :) nice stuff. This blog contains whatever the fuck I reblog, including fandom and 18+ stuff - I do not tag my porn reblogs so if you're following me for fandom things, this is an all in one blog bc i do what i want <3 you are warned! leave if you dislike my beloved freak blog

|･ω･)

just be nice and kind babygirls, that's all i ask of <3 human decency lets go!!!! (ღ˘⌣˘ღ)

my ao3 account is https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daimashiko :) I like writing porn, my brain is constantly on khr mode :) I also never have any consistent name for my accounts, so thats also why my names are different. Hi to any discord friends who know me from well, discord <3 im sure u guys are familiar with my socials in this case

TAGS. ─=≡Σ((( つ＞＜)つ ／(＞×＜)＼

#my art (very self explanatory I am not a creative person with names?? sorryyyyy - i also considered making my art tag into artvidaraku but like. thats too much effort jklsjgkldKJDF:SJ:JKL:JK:LDG ;;)

#khr (that is my main fandom ofc <333 - overlaps with my art but also other people's khr stuff so haha... its a mess but oh well)

#poll (i like answering them! or just reblogging polls i wanted to volunteer in but its too late </3)

#lotta tags (i tend to comment a lot in tags but these are the ones where i usually write like. a lot of commentary to the point im like ohhhh i should tag this right? curious if anyone's ever went through them but also i've never talked abt these things so. oopsssss <3 - lot of it is kinda sad / depressing but usually i am pretty reflective. kinda?)

#animals (self explanatory. i love me some fucking creatures. respect nature babygirls i adore them fellas <3)

#tumblr classic (i love getting to see the classics / things i'd personally consider a classic on my feed)

#fandom (this one's pretty commonly used! yadda yadda, talks abt fanfic and stuff / sometimes i get disappointed with fandom but that's not new lol)

#fashion (i don't use this as much as I should be?? but if you want to check out what i think is fun / a vibe <3)

#avidarecs (****i literally just made this on impulse so there's not much rn but i want to share more of my recs for things in general! fandom / songs / whatever other thing comes to mind?***// will probably be rarely used? but you never know~)

there might be more tags I haven't included but from the top of my head this is it?? Might add more, i have no clue. But anyways back to my other interests and what I'm into!

media i like: khr (its number one bc i am unable to pry reborn's hands on my stupid silly little soul so i cannot escape even if i wanted to), slay the princess + scarlet hollow (games made by the same studio. i love the art and vibes sooo much and also the fanart is sooo beautiful), Jenna Marbles (i've been obsessed w her stuff recently and I hope she's having a good time w her dogs and Julien :), kpop (honestly its only just loona bc im tired and feel old as fuck despite only being in my 20s so i am not gonna get into another thing lol), and sanrio!!! i love my melody she's a cutie patootie <3

-probably more stuff I like but this post would be a lot longer

I'm certain its obvious but I am a proshipper (also i am always in rarepair hell girl HELP. but also i will chain myself to that random mix of characters without prompting. ah....), if you don't like proshippers, leave my page and block me <3

But anyways my fav tropes (i definitely have more i just cant think of them but in general im chill with lots of stuff!)

incest (i am so fr when i say somehow i always revolve around incest ships they're just soooo good. my brain is absolutely destroyed in favor of tasty fucking food. shout out to incest shippers you guys rock luv yall :3)

age gap / size difference (these tropes are lovers and they're already fucking each other within one yard of each other. good fucking food yk?)

any toxic/problematic food (necro + lolisho rights!!!) in general. i am just. yeahhhhhhhhhhh MMMM LOAD THAT SHIT UP. i also have very little memory but still whatever

genderbend - i know it's a dwindling trope in popularity but there is nothing better than mindlessly turning a guy chara into a girl like wow..... so hot.... <3 this has also been a long time trope i've adored and i'll probably never stop using it bc its just that good for me <3 mmm. girls. cute.

monsterfucker stuff is great! (does this include animal hybrids? im going to include it with that soooo)

i think this is enough, but also before you go explore whatever maze my blog is in bc i cant be bothered enough by my blog, i will also reblog things in tandem to politics / real world things (I support Palestine <3). Am American. Am Mess. But I hope the world is kinder even just a little bit more. This world is cruel, but I hope we can continue to offer each other support and love, even when times are harrowing as always.

(っ ᵔ◡ᵔ)っ have a hug/kiss!!!! (i like gifs hehe)

[st-just]

I have a bit of a question here with a probably long answer but you reblogged a post a while ago about ttrpg culture that linked another post and I was really curious why it is people say you cant or shouldnt hack 5e into a sci-fi campaign. I did it just fine with little effort outside of the usual task of building out a world (or several in this case) for it. Granted its essentially spelljammer meets shadowrun but thats still sci-fi enough to have been told time and again by people online that it cannot work

Like I get starfinder exists but im really comfortable in 5e and overall I find starfinder, like pathfinder, relies on a lot of modifiers for rolls, where 5e's math is simpler overall since there are less floating modifiers to calculate, and most importantly my players didnt want to learn a new system since a few of them have trouble committing all the rules to memory and JUST picked up 5e for our other campaign.

Overall people always act like it could never work and theres never any reason to try, even in situations like this i should have just slapped my players with my starfinder book instead of just changing up how a some of the spells work, and the campaign was great, so why is it that people are so insistent on not even trying to do it?

re

So I've never actually played/looked at Starfinder, but to the extent it's 'Pathfinder IN SPAAAACE' it's, like, possibly the single worst possible suggestion to give someone when you're trying to explain the benefits of a non-D&D system, so not sure what the people who say that stuff are really talking about. (Even saying pathfinder/starfinder isn't D&D seems like useless pedantry to me. It's all just Edition 3.75 but with a third party publisher)

But to actually answer the point - there's no problem at all hacking D&D 5e to run Sci Fi instead of Fantasy - the difference is basically set dressing and aesthetics and renaming all the magic stuff. But the sci fi it's good at is still very distinctly D&D sci fi - a zero-to-hero adventure series where the challenges and obstacles the heroes face are primarily expressed in terms of physical harm and danger, and which are primarily defeated through small-scale violence between the protagonists and their opponents.

Like, if you're willing to squint about character classes and whatever, D&D can do something like Mass Effect fine. It would really, really struggle to do Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. (Or I mean, you could do Duet or By Pale Moonlight as D&D sessions, but they would be roughly 90% freeform roleplay with a few die rolls thrown in here and there to keep up appearances. At which point why did you spend an hour doing all the math for character creation in the first place?)

Honestly I think a decent chunk of the rhetoric around this is kind of cartoonishly vitriolic and pretty unbecoming, but it is kind of painful to try and hack at the thing to tell stories it's not at all suited for (if you're not looking for power fantasy pulpy heroic tactical violence, don't use the game that spends 90% of its word count on that!).

(The other thing is that D&D very much relies on the players as acting as independent agents - if you're character isn't someone who solves problems by personally charging into danger, and whose primary problem solving toolkit can be expressed in terms of tactical violence, they just don't really work as a D&D character.)

...sorry, it's pretty late and I'm rambling. Hopefully I understood what you were getting at?

[feral-radfem]

Hi, I'm the anon before who asked about written erotica. Thank you for answering my ask. It was a long response and I'm sure it took a little bit of time, so I'm grateful for that.

As I said I'm new to radical feminism so I haven't had the chance yet to delve too deeply into anti-pornography, just mainly about how women in porn are treated and how it skews men's view of women. So that was why I wanted to ask about erotica. I always saw it as a creative outlet, esp. for women writers since so much of written erotica is... well, you know. But that it rots your brain like any other pornography does make sense actually.

I was quite young when I first got on the internet and I think I may have also been influenced by what you said. And how it kind of fucks with your sexuality. That erotica can also be an addiction never occurred to me, but again, it makes sense.

I've got a lot to think about! I hope you have a nice day.

Thank you for reaching back out. I like knowing that the people I write the responses to do get to see them at some point. Sometimes it feels like answering anons is just screaming into the void, so this was nice.

There is no shame in trying to learn or being new to the subject you're trying to learn. It's good to ask questions. I can definitely see how you came to the conclusion that written erotica is a creative release for women, though. In an era where choice feminism is the dominant strain of feminism all women's choices were framed as a feminist choice. However, things women choose to do, even if they do individually benefit them, cannot be considered feminist if it is detrimental to other women and girls. It's just individualism and women can be just as self-centered as men when they want to be. That's a human condition, unfortunately.

You are not alone in having been young and entering internet spaces that made no effort of regulating this material around the children they knew were there. A lot of them actively encouraged young girls to read it because 5-10 years ago began the revival of the free love movement. Porn, and erotica for women, were equated with masturbation and sexual healthy development. Falsely equated but they were in mainstream media regardless.

It was seen as puritan to try to shame children from engaging in pornography because they hit puberty of course they want to be sexually curious. That was a mass grooming of children being done during the early 2010s on the internet. Now, we have a whole generation of young girls who were pressured or shamed by being told that they were vanilla and to engage with media that continued this pressuring and shaming into their adulthood that they should treat their expressions of sexuality as a performance for others.

Much like Dworkin suggested, we have entered a period in which girls are being convinced that porn is good for them and it's being encouraged by women who have already internalized this message as children. It's our job as radical feminist to make it very clear that pornography of any type has nothing to do with the natural sexual curiosity that comes with puberty nor does it need to be involved in any of your sexuality as you grow older. It never becomes healthy, it is always detrimental, in all its iterations.

Hope you have a great day. Thanks for the follow-up message. :)

[diabolikpersonals]

i'm curious, how do you feel about shu and yuma's chaos lineage? with them being brothers and all, and the way shu gets his memories when he remembers edgar dying... i always see you talk about LE and never CL so i am wondering...

while I own CL, I actually haven't played that much of it ;-; in particular I haven't played yuma's route yet. I do my best to play routes without relying on someone else's translations first, and while that's possible for me, it's still challenging and requires research and a bunch of time with my nose in a dictionary. so I played shu's CL route and liked it, but it took a lot of mental effort and I and was like, "I need to take a break...! I'll pick this up again later!" and. um. well

(and the reason why I talk about LE so much is bc it's my favorite and I've played yuma and shu's routes like 3 times each lmao)

but my personal failings aside, I can tell you what I thought about the shuuma (and shuumayui) content in shu's CL route!!! bc I've done a lot of thinking about it! >:D

my shuuma mantra has always been that they love each other, whether you interpret that love as romantic or familial or as a friendship. you can't deny that they love each other in some way—it is canon, it has been canon. in that sense, CL is a big victory for me!! even if I tend to interpret their love as romantic and this is a "they've been brainwashed to think that they're family" plot, it's still very plain to see that they still love each other. and now I get all this fun domestic content that I never would've gotten otherwise heheh...something as simple as yuma lecturing shu to eat his vegetables fills me with joy ;-;

and there's this idea that I really fixated on when I think about their shared history together. shu and yuma have never been equal, right? rich and poor, comfortable and struggling, vampire and human. and this divide was always present in their relationship: shu is constantly tortured by the idea that he and yuma/edgar are different, and therefore they can never be together or it will end in disaster. while yuma in his childhood loved shu while knowing his high status, for the rest of his life yuma has been bitter towards aristocrats and will often point to shu's inactions and go "that's why aristocrats are so annoying." they can resolve things well and get along, but this inequality between them never really goes away.

but chaos lineage!!! it does this crazy thing!!! where it introduces shu and yuma as BROTHERS, of the same scarlet family, on totally equal footing!!! according to memories, they've been family all their lives! the implications of it drive me insane! I know the illusion of it doesn't last all that long, but for a brief moment in their lives, they were able to forget all about that gap between them that shu thinks is so insurmountable and just be together. the illusion has to go away and we have to remember reality (otherwise shu wouldn't even remember what yuma means to him!!) but when I think about how long shu has been agonizing over this, I think it's nice that he didn't have to worry about it for a while.

then later in the route when shu starts to remember, I love that his memories about yuma are so important. because it's an otome game, I always expect the guy's relationship to yui to be The Most Important Thing, but with shu it often seems like yui and yuma are equally important to him and I really like it. (basically shuumayui canon is what I'm saying) and we got some of those Classic shuuma lines where shu says stuff like "I always lose things that are precious to me..." in reference to edgar. it's so good. I wanted to cry lol

AND [slams hands down] I REALLY LIKED THE SUGAR CUBE SCENE.....I mean obviously, right? yuma trying to cheer shu up, giving him his favorite snack "that he really wanted to eat alone but he'll share them especially with shu......." AND....THE BEST PART OF THE WHOLE ROUTE.......when Yuma said that he knows Shu can do it if he tries, and that he knows that Shu cares deeply about them. And Shu says "...you've always been like this, no matter what happens, you never change."

plus, a happy shuuma cg! this has never happened before!!!!!

I've already talked for so long but I could write a whole essay about this scene alone :'D somehow, yuma said exactly the right thing. if you've played their LE routes then I think you especially understand how important it is for yuma to tell shu, "I know you care and I know you're trying." shu gets a reputation early on in the games for being detached and uncaring. so it's really meaningful that yuma has this level of understanding toward him at this point in the story. he gives off the impression that he doesn't care but he cares so so much, and yuma and yui know that better than anyone. </3

I Must stop here bc this is where my notes (yes I took fucking notes. can u see why I got burnt out quickly lmao) end. but I'll definitely pick up CL again, refresh myself on this route and play yuma's, and then report back with whatever angsty revelations and silly jokes about it that I think of 👍

[isntthatwrite]

if i was anything, i'd be everything - 12th house

astrology tangent: from my perspective, houses tend to be the thing that separates the astrology enthusiasts from the Vaguely Curious But Not That Into It. houses kind of ask that you really learn the material and apply it, think a little deeper, etc etc. my perspective. anyway, the 12th house in astrology is probably the first of the houses i began to seek more information on. discovering i have a luminary (my moon) in the 12th house was a trip.

we follow the houses through a life cycle- born in the 1st house, going all the way around until the 12th, the end of the cycle. 12th is where we review everything before we die, but we are not yet ready to let go. it's like how in older age, you remember bits and pieces - less of the details and more of the feelings. the feelings will never die. to me, 12th house has always felt like i've had the feelings and am looking back reflectively, but i have no recollection of the experience itself. like i'm reviewing a life i haven't even experienced myself. here, i attempt to elaborate.

----

pulling a line from carrie bradshaw after hearing Big was engaged - after the relationship ends, where does the love go? except my focus is neither of those bozos. it's the concept of this intangible- what happens to feeling once it's time to leave? what happens to this part of you that does not die after it's been born? what happens when you're born into a house of memories?

on a cellular level, i can never forget any of it. the conscious memories always lied dormant, which i speculate is why it was so easy to begin to feel them again when given the prompt. it takes time to make peace with reality. some of us never belonged in linear time to begin with. some of us have a physical response to what has never happened to us on this plane of existence, and it makes us look insane to the external eye. i could never put it to words and i thought for all this time it would be useless to try -- maybe it still is -- maybe i don't mind it being useless. in the grand scheme of it, no one can tell me what matters to me like i can. nobody writes the thesis statement for the essay that makes no sense and elicits criticism for its incoherence and complete rejection of mandatory structure. nobody remembers the writer who is too old to live and too young to die.

i am enrolled in film 1101 and watching a homemade psychedelic mind trip of a final project by a freshman who is exploring fantastical concepts he doesn't believe in and immediately fails class critique. i am trapped at the intersection of the dreamers and the realists and i remind them they are more alike than they are opposite. at the end of it all, we become the same thing over and over recursively until we no longer can be differentiated. i love you in the sense that our molecular structure was once interwoven and i never forgot, i just needed to see again. i love you in the sense that i would never deny that we forever change each other every time we meet, and we always arrive at exactly the time we need, each and every time. we are there exactly as long as we need to be and not a second more - but there we always were and always will be. i speak like this about everyone, past present and future, because they all coexist. much like everyone i've ever loved, time also can no longer be differentiated. the smell in the air reminds me of yesterday, 5 years ago, a day soon to come, the rest of my life and i know these things all to be true with no evidence to provide until it can be demonstrated in the linear scope. by that point, no one will care, but it was never going to matter to anyone but myself. i can only bear witness to myself in here, i cannot see anyone else despite my best efforts

state change is the only thing most people will recognize. i've left, i've started again, i've done something markedly new and different and i have stopped the old. nobody saw what i did before the change. nobody saw what brought me there, how hard it was to be in the state of inbetween, incapable of witness and intangible to everyone including myself. it hurts to be here because i do not know where anything is going, how i'll know when it arrives, anything more than i will just have to hope.

i have faith in what i cannot yet see. i look delusional for it. i know the joy i will experience because it lives within me and i have felt it throughout time. einstein's "spooky action at a distance" or quantum entanglement is an attempt to describe and quantify this phenomenon that many of us viscerally know and feel (whether we admit it or not)- the pieces of us that live within each other and activate as the years go on and influence each other without ever having solid evidence as to why. i never had to even know you to have been influenced. we share the same state and have no idea until perhaps one day in this life, we meet. over and over, the universe creates parallels, pieces of each other will live together / separate / in some bizarre in between state of together yet separate / forever influenced though intentionally separate. in minor ways, we are always preparing for what will be coming. meeting people changes our lives forever.

being born honors an entire previous lineage. i love who i never knew but always will be. there i once was, there we once were, there we always will be - i can never be without you. i reject the notion that i can never know the women who came before me who didn't live at the same time as i did, i'm more them that i can ever cognitively realize. i feel pain when visiting places i never even knew you suffered in. i speak what was hidden without a clue as to why i'm saying it. you cannot put me in the box that hurt her. i won't fit. i am the opportunity to try again and i do not have the option to go back in. i am crying out in pain because she wished she could, i wake up confused as to why i'm crying -- i'm crying for us all, so she can finally be free and at peace -- she deserved it long ago

i think there is this universally believed concept that anyone can give anyone advice on how they can receive closure and move on.

(https://www.tumblr.com/mitskiarthistory/612950940503441408/illustration-for-goodnight-moon-clement-hurd)

[heart-of-copper-dog-training]

It's the small things sometimes...

Had a wonderful session with two clients (married couple) and their intradog household problems. It is a complicated case, to say the least, and we've been mostly doing management while working on tiny things to help bring the household into peace.

Today, I went over to give a "dog body language 101" slideshow I made specifically for them (and now will be able to share with others since it took me WAY longer than anticipated to do) and it went astoundingly well.

When I took them on, I could see some of the issues with the dogs was simply a lack of understanding the body language the dogs would give. One dog would give a submissive grin and be called the aggressor when the second dog only barked at her in response, forcing the first dog to feel the need to escalate.

There are a lot of moving pieces in this case and it would take so long to go over it, but we had some great small victories today.

What started as a slideshow to discuss the different signals dogs can give turned into an amazing discussion about THEIR dogs and the signals they are now recognizing on them. I could see the metaphorical lightbulb over their heads as they recognized things they'd misunderstood in the past.

They asked questions and were able to point out specific things they'd seen, looked at the provided pictures with keen eyes and were able to identify different contexts of different signals.

It was just a really great session and I wish I'd done it sooner with them. They even identified when one of their dogs was reacting out of trigger stacks (uncontrolled by them, a series of thunderstorms caused additional stress that put her on a short fuse) and we talked about strategies for times like this when things are out of our control.

I've been working with them for almost three months now and the progress has been slow. It has to be, with what all is going on. But we are seeing the progress.

I am seeing their understanding grow. Their faith in the program and their determination to do what is necessary to help BOTH of their dogs.

They have seen looser bodies at home more often than before. Both dogs have begun to relax more at home. One dog who was terrified of the crate has now started to curious stick her nose in and willingly enter it as long as she chooses and the door remains open. They are seeing of the dog's reactivity to strangers go from full barking and backing up to a simple look and disengage.

I know it was a hard sell. They weren't sure there were solutions. They were worried their dogs were "broken" and would never be "fixed", but only managed. And while we are not at a point where we can say whether or not management will ever truly go away, we are seeing some of the smaller issues resolve as we wait to work on the harder ones. We've even (working with their vet) identified a previously unknown medical issue and are waiting for the "all's clear" from the vet to continue work with that dog. A medical issue that was most certainly causing discomfort and a low level of stress at all times.

When we do behavior work, we need to appreciate our small victories. And sessions like this one remind me why I love to do this. It's not about the dramatic results seen on many tiktoks and youtube videos that get all the engagement. Behavior work is slow. It's boring. It's not dramatic because we don't want to encourage our dogs to practice these behaviors.

But it works. Given enough time and effort, the results will come. And seeing that, and more importantly, my CLIENTS seeing that, is one of those things I will always cherish.

They feel confident and reassured. They are not bad dog guardians, their dogs are not broken. They are doing something right and they feel good about it.

Like I said before, I don't train dogs, I train people. And when I see the people finally clicking with it, there is almost nothing in the world more satisfying because it tells me I am doing something right. I am helping them in their time of need, and because of that, I will be able to make a difference in their and their dogs' quality of life.

As always, be kind to yourself, to others, and to your dogs. It's free to be kind.

[vernalseason]

Here's why I'm so goddamn feral about The Bear.

I ran an ice cream store for about five years. No, it wasn’t fine dining, it wasn’t even a restaurant, but it was still food service. We were in a vacation town, and our place was the only ice cream store in the area, and the ice cream was GOOD. Customers used to ask me all the time if I got sick of eating it and I’d say no, and I meant it. It was reasonably fancy as ice cream goes, with some pretty out-there flavors, but mostly it was just GOOD. Super flavorful, dense but not chewy the way that some ice creams get where it feels like it’s stretching unnaturally when you pull your spoon away…

Point is, it was an ice cream shop in a tourist town, and in the summer we got killed during service every single night. Nonstop lines from 7 til 12 or 1 in the morning, no breaks. We got after-dinner crowds, after-show crowds, hordes of camp kids a busload at a time, and it might not have been fine dining but we worked HARD. We had 8, 9, 10 people on peak days all scooping, cleaning, making milkshakes (which is The Worst, in case you were curious), restocking by running down rickety definitely-not-to-code stairs to our tiny walk-in and hauling ice cream up 4 boxes at a time—because goddamn it, time was valuable and running up and down the stairs sucked and no one was going to go down multiple times when you could just grab 4 at a time and grit your teeth and shove them onto the counter upstairs feeling like you’d just benched your own body weight.

At the start of the summer, Memorial Day weekend, we were at our absolute peak. Following a truly herculean hiring effort aided by the promise of unlimited free ice cream, we had a crew of 20-odd overcaffeinated teenagers and twentysomethings who were working a truly awe-inspiring pace to kill the line. My favorite moments were, variously:

Being so busy I had to run two registers simultaneously, waiting for Square to process a transaction on one (chip card readers were murderously slow in the early days) while taking cash on the other;

Absolutely shattering every store record on a Saturday night with a skeleton crew and getting approval to order 12AM pizza on the company card, and taking a long, long hour to eat before we finally had to get around to scrubbing the calcified ice cream off the floors;

Gearing up to call for a restock on spoons, napkins, and other such necessities only to find that my assistant manager was behind me with a milk crate of those very things;

And so on.

There was about a month and a half of beautiful, well-staffed, smooth-running time before things frayed at the edges. Suddenly the factory couldn't get enough ingredients, since the company was chronically broke (turns out wholesale ice cream is a bad idea, folks; retail is where it's at), or the store walk-in broke down and we had to resort to chest freezers for storage for a month, or, most commonly, we started losing staff. I was always after the owner of the company to hire more year-round full-time staff, but there was always something more urgent for him to spend money on, like rent. So inevitably our staff would start leaving for college, and we'd be left with about half to a third of the staff we really needed to run. Which is when things started getting bad.

There are only so many doubles you can work before you start losing your grip on reality. I recall one day in August when I was somehow, improbably, the only person available to fill an entire day of shifts, and worked from 9AM pre-open to 11PM at night. The only thing that I remember is that the tips were phenomenal. But by Labor Day weekend we were down to our last seasonal staff and the entire core crew had worked at least two doubles that week and we limped into the off season with about two remaining brain cells between us.

Anyway. This post was supposed to be about The Bear.

I've never seen a show—or at least, never seen a FICTIONAL show—that so deeply understands what it means to be in food service. I watched the first episode in absolute awe of how they captured the intensity—just GOING until you get a moment to yourself in the bathroom, in the walk-in, in the office. And when you slow down, you think about how tired you are. How burnt out. How much all you really want is just to sit, maybe eat a slice of pizza, and stare into space for an hour. But then you go back out, and you get back to work.

I've also never seen a show that so accurately captures what it looks like and feels like to be a manager. Carmy losing his temper, giving in to that righteous anger in 'Review'—how DARE you not cover your station, how DARE you leave me with this mess that you created—I've been there. I'm not proud of it. I didn't punch a ticket printer, or scream in anyone's face, but I lost my cool, and that sticks with me. You don't get to take it back. You apologize (even if you were right), you patch things up, but no one ever really forgets.

But the show also does justice to one of the great joys of the service industry: getting to see people improve. One of my favorite subplots is Tina going from sabotaging Sydney to respecting her, trusting her, defending her. But mostly, it's my favorite because we see her get BETTER. She goes from just holding down her station to being a pro, from throwing things together to being careful, and thoughtful, and focused. And that moment when Tina says 'thank you, chef', and means it, really MEANS it, that's the kind of thing that gets me all teary. Because it's so much more than just 'thank you', but you'd have spend a hell of a lot longer to get it all out.

I guess if I was going to trace my rabid and, so far undiminished love of the show to a single thing, it would be the fact that it makes me feel seen. I haven't done that much reading on the people who made the show, but enough of them clearly lived this life or got close enough to it that they understand what it does to people, and what it requires of them. I loved working in food service, and sometimes I even miss it. I loved getting to make people's days, to give kids their first-ever ice cream, to feel like people were leaving in a better mood than they came in. And I met my partners through this life, all three of them, which is as exactly as wild and improbable as it sounds. But every time I look back on it fondly, I make myself remember that it was miserable too. The late nights, the early mornings, the days off cut short by delivering emergency stock or jumping in to cover a shift or just ending back up at the shop out of habit. The crushed toes and ragged wrist tendons and hoarse throats, the constant phone calls or checking sales to try and anticipate if we needed more staff. The sensation that after service, the rest of the world was dim in comparison.

I sank so much time and energy into that life, and I think the last thing I love about The Bear, the other thing that makes me tear up a little bit, is that for them it turns out alright in the end. They work through the problems, they make things run smooth, and they get the chance to build the place they dreamed about. That was always what I wanted, what I was working toward—the chance to make things better. And even in fiction, it makes me happy to see that come true.