NS!AU incorrect quotes
Star: *Laughs* Eclipse, you had a crush on me? That’s embarrassing—
Eclipse : We’re married.
Moon, Solar and Eclipse : *screaming*
Earth: *runs into the room* What's wrong, Solar?!
Moon: Wait, why are you asking Solar that when Eclipse and I are also here?
Earth: Because Solar wouldn't scream unless it's an emergency. You two scream whenever you have the chance.
Earth: So you’re dating Solar?
Ruin: What? No! I’m just buying them an accessory since they have terrible fashion sense.
Earth: That’s literally a wedding ring.
Earth: I assume you realize that this kind of idiocy will not be tolerated in this house.
Ruin: Is there any kind of idiocy you would be more comfortable with?
Ruin: Is this gaslighting? Am I being gaslit?
Puppet: If I were gaslighting you, you’d never know it.
Ruin: Is THAT gaslighting?
Puppet: Shut up.
Solar, very tired: Can I sleep in your bed?
Ruin: *half asleep* Solar , this is a queen-sized bed. That means it’s for *gestures vaguely to themself* the Queen.
Earth: I am the sand guardian, guardian of the sand.
Eclipse: Puppet quivers before them!
Earth: Fuck off!
Sun: Words ending in 'ie' just sound so adorable. Like cutie, sweetie, cookie-
Puppet: Eyy, homie!
Moon: But then there's cootie...
Earth: Die.
Lunar: how do you ask someone out?
Ruin: Well, first-
Solar: Don't ask them, they asked me out in a McDonalds parking lot.
Lunar: ...And you said yes?
Solar and Ruin: *Plays Slender: The Eight Pages*
*Jumpscare*
Ruin: *Jumps back* OH S*IT, IT'S A WHITE GUY!!!
Puppet: Earth doesn’t look very happy.
Solar: That's their happy. They're just a b*tch.
Lunar, to Puppet: If you see Pollux, give them this message *makes a neutral face*
Lunar: They'll know what it means.
*later*
Puppet: oh, and Lunar said to give you a message.
Puppet: *makes a neutral face*
Pollux: Oh no- The neutral face of displeasure.
Lunar : So don't panic but one of us is possessed by an owl....
Eclipse: ....
Solar: .....
Puppet: ......
Star: ..Who?
Lunar : That's the thing we don't-
*Everyone stares at Star*
Eclipse : Hey, can we stay in your house tonight?
Solar: Why?
Eclipse : Puppet fiddled with an ouija board and cursed ours.
Puppet: Earth doesn't know how to banish spirits, so they just throw salt at them and yell "DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A HOTEL TO YOU?!"
*The Squad using an Ouija board*
Puppet: Tell us… Is there a spirit in this house?
Spirit, through the board: YES.
Puppet: Great! Rent is due on the first of the month.
Eclipse: Oh, and movie night is on Friday if you want to hang out.
Earth: WAIT, WHAT—
Eclipse : What can therapy do for me that screaming in my car for 30 minutes can’t?
Earth: make you talk to people.
Pollux : Lunar, what does IDK, ILY, and TTYL mean?
Lunar: I don’t know, I love you, talk to you later.
Pollux : Alright, I love you too, I'll ask Castor.
Lunar: Wait- Pollux , no-
Pollux: I was voted “friendliest classmate” in high school.
Ruin: I was voted “most likely to become a clown”…
Lunar: You think that’s bad? HA! I was voted “most likely to get rabies”!
Castor: When I was your age-
Earth, mocking Castor: When I was your height.
Castor: . . .
Castor: Listen here you little s*it-
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