Hello yes I would like to know more about your Fullmetal Alchemist AU because that was amazing. The Ashari doing alkahestry, *chef's kiss*. Delilah as Envy, genius move. Saundor as Lust, perfect casting is perfect.
Vex with the title of Sewing Life Alchemist, much better person than the original holder of the title. And that Truth took part of her heart, oh that's good.
!! Thank you so much! I love this AU but it has so many moving parts it's hard even for me to juggle them sometimes pfft.
God there's so much to talk about uhhhh:
It's a super complicated AU in part because I'm including Campaign 1 PCs as the older cast (Vex, Vax, Percy, Pike and Grog are all in the military, Keyleth gets a bit of Scar and Mei's roles, Tary is Somewhere) and the Campaign 2 PCs as the younger (Beau and Caleb fill the role of the Elrics, Jester is probably Winry-ish with some Mei elements, Veth is a chimera, idk what Fjord is up to, Yasha is likely Ishvalan, Essek gets to be Ling <3, idk what I'm gonna do to Molly and Kingsley. Probably terrible things. He might be Hoenheim/Father/idk. Maybe he'd fit better as Ling then Greed but I Like Essek Best Ok). Which is complex enough on its own (I can get conflict between the kids and their military babysitters with Beau and Percy butting heads), but what makes it extra dicey is the homunculi. I want to try and ensure that the main villains have a good balance between CR1 ones and CR2's, but whereas many of VM's antagonists are connected (Vecna/Sylas/Delilah/kiiinda Ripley, all the Conclave), the M9's are very disperse - and with all these enemies it's hard to unite them under one goal. Do I include the Conclave? What about the Iron Shepherds? Lucien's group? Avantika? So for the oneshot I just said fuck it and narrowed in on the most Perc'ahlia relevant information (and had Keyleth there instead of Jester, to stick to the C1 cast).
I've shuffled around a lot of the alchemical signatures of several characters due to what fits and what doesn't - for instance, though Vex neatly fills a lot of Roy's role, she is never associated with fire. Caleb, however, is, so the Ed-equivalent gets to be the Flame Alchemist. As a Ranger, Vex is very difficult to make fit into the State Alchemist system, so I made her role more research-focused (while still keeping with the terrible guilt and shame that Roy has that I think fits Vex nicely as well). As the Sewing Life Alchemist, she can be a more successful Shou Tucker: I figure she stumbled on Trinket (an early state-made chimera), tried to learn how to fix him, and so ended up roped into that research division to keep her from blabbing. A lot of her research focused on healing and accelerating growth, and she has a knack for using every ounce of power offered by Equivalent Exchange; as a result it was easy enough to slot her in with the team creating viable human-animal chimeras - the people who originally fucked up Trinket. By that point, it's too late to get out. So she has a lot of Guilt <3 Elaina died either to plague (like Trisha Elric) or got burnt in one of those staged conflicts to get souls/blood for the nation-wide array. Vax gets to snipe up bits of Hughes, Havoc and Nina's roles in the story: I'm unsure of if he's been used to keep Vex in line before, but he certainly gets fucked up by Lust. I'm unsure if the military then steal him away and turn him into a chimera, or if Vex is forced to do that to her own brother to keep him alive. I really want to include some thematic nod to 'take me instead you raven bitch', though, so. Help?
Nixing the up-and-coming Colonel being the Flame Alchemist also impacts Percy's role: I knew I wanted him to be tattooed with secrets like Riza (if you cant tell from Get your hands dirty, I love the concept), but without Flame Alchemy, what could be worth hiding? After some fanangling, I decided that the de Rolos have a decent lineage of military service, especially as State Alchemists, and though Percy never showed the knack for the magic aspect he grasps the theory very well (and instead tinkered with guns). So, as the spare, he offered to get the family's research tattooed on his back. Least he could do - until the estate was swarmed and everyone was killed by some fuckers and Percy was tortured for the code to the notes on his back. Envy (Dewiwah) and Dr.Ripley were behind most of it, with Delilah taking on the faces of people Percy knew both to get her foot in the castle and to torment him. He joined the military in an attempt to protect himself, only to slowly start figuring out that they were the ones who ordered the hit, at which point he stages a lab accident and has Vex heal his back juuust enough to maintain functionality but otherwise ensuring it scars. I'm suspecting the secret was either that his family stumbled on the nation-wide array or something that put Father's plan in huge hot water. Cass is probably a hostage-ward of the Briarwoods and might not know Delilah is responsible for anything given her changing face :D
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The eagerly awaited part 2 of the DILF!Steve concert saga is here!! Part 1, in case you missed it.
"You're not going."
"Come on! I haven't thrown up in an hour!"
"The drive to the venue is an hour and a half."
"Steve-"
"And if you throw up in my car-"
"Oh my God-"
"I'll kill you."
Steve doesn't need to see Dustin's eye roll in order to feel the full force of it through the phone.
"I'll just kill you. You'll have a headstone within the week that says Here Lies Dustin Henderson: Rightfully Murdered for Puking in Steve Harrington's Car," he continues as he packs Capri-Suns into the cooler for the car ride.
He doesn't remember ever being that thirsty as a kid, but if Anna wants strawberry kiwi, Anna gets strawberry kiwi. It helps that it's Steve's favorite flavor, too.
"I'd need a big ass headstone to fit all of that," Dustin snaps.
"Your big-ass ego would demand no less, shithead," Steve shoots back.
"Swear jar, Daddy!" Anna calls from her room, across the house because while she doesn't listen to Steve when he's right in front of her, she can hear him break the swear jar rule from halfway across the world.
He zips up the cooler, fishes a quarter out of his pocket, and throws it into the half-full soup can next to the stove.
(A quarter doesn't mean much, but Anna doesn't know that. The day Steve teaches that kid about inflation is the day his pockets become permanently empty.)
"Did she just swear jar you?" Dustin asks from over the phone.
"You baited me into it."
"I did no such thing."
Steve rolls his eyes. "You're not coming, though, are you?"
Dustin sighs, and, for all his teasing, Steve does genuinely feel bad. "I still feel like if I breathe wrong, I'll hurl, so, no. I don't think I'll manage the car ride, nevermind the actual show."
"Sorry dude."
"Don't be. Some dickhead will live stream the whole thing on Instagram, anyway. I'll live vicariously through them."
Steve snorts and picks up the cooler. He got Anna dressed beforehand, so it's just a matter of getting her to stop playing with whatever toy she dug up - Play-Doh has been the fixation of the week - in her room so they can go.
"Besides," Dustin continues, and Steve hates where this is going. "Anna loved the show, and you've got a reason-"
"Nope," Steve says, knocking on Anna's door. "Don't finish that sentence."
"All I'm saying-"
"I know what you're gong to say, which means you know my answer. I don't date."
Anna opens her door. From the little Steve can see inside, there are at least three containers of Play-Doh open and strewn across the floor. He thinks her Barbies are involved in it somehow.
"Time to go," Steve says, and he thinks, Please don't let there be Play-Doh in the Barbie hair.
"Five more minutes," Anna tries.
"Nope. Clean up and roll out."
"Hi, Anna," Dustin says through the phone.
"Uncle Dusty!" Anna shrieks, and she starts jumping up and down. "Are you comin', too?"
Dustin sighs, and Steve can't tell if it's at the nickname or if he's still cursing the universe. "No, but you and your dad have a great time, okay?"
"Can you, can you tell Daddy I should get five more minutes?"
Steve raises his eyebrows at her. Anna, to her credit, ignores him wonderfully.
"If you clean up," Dustin says, because he's actually Steve's favorite person right now, "you get to do more headbanging at the concert."
Anna gasps like Steve didn't already tell her that earlier today, and she gets to work on putting her toys away. Steve helps, of course, and he finds that there is, in fact, Play-Doh in two of her Barbies' hair.
Fun. They're going to turn into Buzzcut Barbies when Anna goes to sleep because he can already tell that they are the furthest thing from salvageable.
But that doesn't matter right now. What matters is getting Anna in the car, deploying the first two of many strawberry kiwi Capri Suns from the cooler, and making the drive to the venue, which Steve does with minimal road rage and accompanied by the Disney radio station.
Success by all metrics, really.
Dinner might as well be now, so Steve shells out a truly disgusting amount of money for overpriced chicken nuggets and fries at the venue. Anna will only eat half her portion but say she's hungry later, but that's what the snacks and water Steve smuggled in via his jacket are for.
They get to their seats, dinner finished up, just as the lights go down for the first opener. Steve looks to his left, half-expecting Eddie and his friends to be there before remembering that they won't be.
He tries not to feel too disappointed. He fails miserably.
The seat next to him, however, isn't empty. There's a note taped to the back of it, one addressed to Steve and Miss Anna, so Steve feels alright taking and opening it.
At the top, there's a messily scrawled phone number. Underneath, it says:
Here's my number. Probably a bad idea to call with all the noise. Texting works, though you should do that after the show. I'll be a little busy until then.
-Eddie
Steve puts the note in his pocket, puts Anna's ear defenders on, puts his own earplugs in, and looks at the stage, where-
Hang on.
He squints at the stage, where four guys have started playing a song that, frankly, sounds too much like literally all the music Steve listened to yesterday for him to care about all that much. The drummer is pretty small, with wild, curly hair. The bassist looks familiar. The lead singer, who is very talented but not to Steve's personal taste, also looks familiar. And the guitarist-
No way. No way in hell.
It's a total coincidence. Lots of guys have long, curly hair and heavy jewelry and big eyes and are wearing formal wear, for some reason, and catch Steve's eye, and-
"Thank you for such a great welcome!" the guitarist says, and his smile totally isn't doing anything to Steve, thanks very much.
Anna stops moving, where she's standing next to Steve, and climbs up into his lap to get a better look at the stage. She looks out, then back at Steve, then out, then back at Steve, making a face as confused as Steve feels.
Some days, he thinks he ended up with a clone, not a kid.
"I'll get off the mic in a second. I only do the talking because Jeff," the guitarist points at the lead singer, who ducks his head, "is really shy."
Jeff. That name is definitely relevant, but Steve is a permanent resident of denial.
"We fought about what song we were going to include next in our set list, so much so that we didn't decide until yesterday and had to consult a tiebreaker."
Okay, maybe Steve is a less permanent resident of denial than he thought.
"So, thank you to Miss Anna, who did great at headbanging for her first time-"
Anna whips around so fast, her forehead nearly collides with Steve's jaw.
"And to Steve, who's a big fan of American Psycho."
At the song name, the crowd loses their minds, and if Anna wasn't sitting right in front of him, Steve would join them.
Because what the fuck is happening right now?
His question isn't answered. In fact, about five more questions pop up in its stead when, during the bridge of the song, Jeff puts on a clear rain jacket and picks up a prop axe.
Please, God, don't let this traumatize my kid, Steve thinks.
Anna, thankfully, doesn't get scared. When Jeff brings the axe down, again and again, Steve's weirdo daughter fucking smiles. And giggles. It's kind of cute, actually.
When the song ends, she turns back to Steve.
"That's Eddie onstage," Steve says, and saying it, somehow, makes it real.
"I thought so!" Anna says, and she turns back to watch the show. Steve puts an arm around her waist so she doesn't fall off his lap when she bangs her head to the music.
The rest of the songs, in Steve's opinion, are better than the opening song. They're more melodic, which Steve can definitely get behind, and each of them has a gimmick onstage, all based off of various horror movies. It's ridiculous, but also really, really cool.
And Eddie, onstage, because it is the same guy who flirted with him and was so sweet to Anna yesterday, is really, really hot.
Steve has never had a thing for guitarists before. He's never had a thing for musicians before. Hell, until a year ago, he didn't realize he had a thing for men.
Eddie is. Uh. Yeah. Really doing it for him.
Steve doesn't know whether it's his enthusiasm, or the way he moves, or seeing his hair tied up, or the fucking dress pants and suspenders, or just his hands, but he does know he has to get himself in check because this is an all ages show and he's here with his daughter.
He already knows he can't add these songs to his grading playlist, not when they're accompanied by visuals of Eddie playing his guitar.
Sweet Jesus.
"Alright, that's our set!" Eddie says. "Thanks, y'all, for sticking around for us, and let's give it up for the next act!"
The crowd, including Anna and Steve, cheer as they exit and the lights go up.
Steve fishes his phone out of his pocket, fully intending to add Eddie's number to his contacts, and is greeted by not one, not two, but sixteen missed calls from Dustin Henderson.
Naturally, Steve calls him back. "Who died?"
"What the fuck?" Dustin yells, and Steve just puts the phone on speaker to save the rest of his hearing. "Did Eddie fucking Munson just personally thank you from the stage?"
"Swear jar, Uncle Dusty!" Anna says.
"Sorry," Dustin says. "But Steve. Answers. Now."
"How do you even-"
"Instagram live. Is Eddie the guy you were telling me about yesterday?"
Steve takes his phone off speaker. Prior experience tells him that this conversation has a less than zero chance of staying PG, nevermind PG-13.
"Yeah," Steve says. "He is."
"The one who flirted with you, and you forgot to ask for his number."
"Well, I have it now."
"What?" Dustin shrieks, and Steve is incredibly thankful that he didn't take his earplugs out.
"He left me his number on the seat."
"Text him."
"I was going to, until I saw that you called me sixteen times."
"Jesus Christ, Eddie Munson was flirting with you."
Steve rolls his eyes and hands a pack of gummy bears to Anna when she taps his arm. "He could have just been nice. I don't even know if he's into guys."
"Have you looked at him?"
"Wow, Dustybuns, I didn't know you were homophobic."
"I think it's the complete opposite of homophobic to try to get you laid."
"Hanging up!" Steve shouts because a part of him will never see Dustin as any older than thirteen, and no thirteen year old should ever say that.
"Text-"
Steve hangs up the call. "Can I have a gummy bear?"
"No," Anna says, mouth full, in her seat, legs swinging.
"I bought them."
She shrugs. "You gave them to me. Mine now."
Steve stares. She stares right back.
He sighs and opens a new pack of gummy bears.
With his mouth full of sweet Haribo corpses, Steve takes out the note and adds Eddie to his contacts. Before he can overthink it, he sends him a message:
I guess I don't have to ask you what you do for a living. Just so we're even on that front, I'm a teacher, and Anna's full time job is preschool.
He tucks his phone back into his pocket and focuses on making this a good experience for Anna, who somehow wormed her way into a conversation with the intimidating-looking couple sitting next to her.
Because it's totally not like a literal rockstar is going to text him back. Right?
Part 3!!
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