#v much jilted ex lovers

[macbethvsromeo]

in terms of wlw icons, y’all don’t b talking abt them enough for me ‼️‼️

[jungcity]

love, eternal. | v

genre: reincarnation!au, fallen angel!au

[supernatural!au-ish, angst, use of blunts and intoxicants, extra asshole jaehyun, smut, vulgar words]

pairing: jung jaehyun x reader

words: 7k

warnings: unprotected sex [use protection, always!!]

note: hello, loves! since ive been stucked inside our house, doing nothing, and all i could do is write— here’s another update! thank you for your kind words and comments the last update. i appreciate every single one of you. it makes me happy to think that you enjoy my writing style and the plot that i have in my silly mind. i hope you stay healthy and please please please wash your hands and sanitize!! i love you 💕

part iv | part vi

“God, if you’re out there,

if you’re listening,

he fucks like a seraphim,

and there’s no part of scripture

that ever prepared you for his hands.

Hands that map a communion

in the cradle of your hips.

Hands that kiss hymns up your sides.

He confesses how long he’s looked

for a place to worship and,

oh,

you put him on his knees.”

—excerpts from PROFANE by Ashe Vernon

Aurora.

Aurora.

Aurora.

With every chant of her name in your mind, you take a swig of the liquor with relish that would surely give you a hell-worth of hangover tomorrow. You couldn’t bring yourself to care now that you’re in a pit of a hole you don’t know how to climb off. Jaehyun was enraged by your constant chivvying, jilting your questions about Aurora like an ex-lover. While telling you aggressively that you have no business poking your nose where it doesn’t belong.

“Shut your mouth. I won’t hear questions anymore.”

Those were his words of command. After that, you kept your mouth shut the whole ride back to the hotel. And in the end, you didn’t tell them about your dreams either. If they’re reluctant to share something with you, you wouldn’t share the visions you have in your sleep with them too.

Asking Johnny about Aurora was like talking to the wind. He let your questions die unheard, excusing himself to greet the guests who needs his attention. Of course, what did you expect? All of the men who flocks around Jaehyun are his brethren, they won’t betray Jaehyun for you. They won’t answer your question without Jaehyun’s permission, that much you’re sure of because of your boss’ ubiquitous influence. Chaelin offered you no hope, dodging your question whenever she gets the chance. She offered you bits of information; about Aurora’s appearance— confirming that the Aurora you see is the Aurora of them— which you’re already familiar of because of your dreams. Besides that, Chaelin said nothing more.

It’s unusual, hearing her name in the real world. You’re not one to believe in superstitions, but there’s something about your dreams that made you want to tear off the meanings inside Jaehyun’s chest. It drives you mad, anxious, and even desperate. Yet your courage could only go far. One look from Jaehyun and all the questions bubbling in your mouth dissipates into nothingness.

Aurora being Jaehyun’s ex-lover already crossed your mind. His aloofness towards her name tells you something hadn’t gone well between them. But where is she now? Johnny knows her, so you assume that she’s close friends with Jaehyun’s friends. Why didn’t she show up in the party? Why does she only appear in your dreams?

You’re thirsty for answers and no one seems brave enough to quench your thirst. But maybe the liquor on your table could do the work.

Johnny’s party ended an hour ago. Here you are, satisfying yourself the way you did not allow to at his party. You left the hotel without giving Jaehyun a heads up of where you are. Why would you? He won’t give you answers to your questions, so you won’t give him the knowledge of your location. Not that it’s important to him anyways. He could go and do his office duties all by himself, if he dared work at one a.m. in the morning. But maybe he’s asleep, or doing his nightly ritual being that he’s a spawn of the devil come to life.

“You’re crazy, Y/N. Crazy and drunk,” You mumbled to yourself, sluggish words coming out your mouth.

“What’s a pretty lady doing here all alone while drinking herself to oblivion?”

You snapped your head to the owner of the voice. A man in his past thirty made his way on the bar stool beside you. He’s tall, hard muscles almost stretching the blue long-sleeves polo he’s wearing. You suddenly felt wary by his presence, so you moved an inch away from him.

“I won’t bite,”

The sentence came out sultry, with the man’s smirk matching it. You suddenly felt stupid to come out in a city you’re not familiar with in the dead of the night. Yet who could blame you? You wanted to lose your mind tonight, far away from the questions that tries to infiltrate every corner of your brain. However, the presence of the man beside you gave you an ominous feeling.

So you stood up, catching yourself when you slide on the same stool you sat on. The man is quick to wrap his warm hand on your arm, whispering on you to be careful.

“Thanks,” you muttered the one word laconically. Slapping a bill on the table, you dashed outside of the bar, your steps waddling as the wind greeted you outside, making you shiver.

“Shit, shit.” You curse as you clutch a handful of hair in your close palm, the liquor you pick hit hard than what you expected.

“Where are you staying?”

You ignore the same man at the bar who’s trying to catch on you. Although waddling, you tried to pick up your pace. The hotel is just five-minutes away. You have to get there untouched.

“Hey, it’s dangerous to walk these streets alone. Let me—”

He gripped your arm, hard enough to make sure you won’t budge.

“Hey!” You screamed at him, trying to pull your arm free, but the man didn’t stir. He only ran down his eyes on your body, like you’re a delectable meal he would soon devour.

“Let me go!”

The streets are dead, and the few bystanders glanced at you with concern in their faces. You inhaled a lot of air, ready to scream for help but the man only looked at the few passersby apologetically.

“I’m sorry, my girlfriend here had too much drink.”

Girlfriend? You wanted to crawl and spit on his face. How dare he call you his girlfriend when you do not have any idea of who he is? But his grip on your arm never slackened. If not, his fingers only dig deeper on your flesh.

“You will come with me without making noise or else—”

“Or else what?”

You’d recognize that voice even a mile away. Jaehyun. As much as you want to tell him to go and leave you on your own business, your nerves screams for him to help you. The slight twist of his mouth tells you that he feels your discomfort under the man’s presence. And you know he is not happy about it.

“Who are you?”

Jaehyun brushed off the man’s question by walking towards you, hands on his pocket, not a trace of emotion could be seen on his face. When he’s finally standing face to face with your captor, he swiftly pulled you towards him. Though the tight grip of the man left your flesh smarting, you felt instantly safe beside Jaehyun. But it was short-lived as the man pulled you taut towards him again. Why won’t he drop it and fuck off already?

“Fuck of—”

The man did not finish his vulgar words for Jaehyun landed a fist on his jaw right away. He stumbled on his feet, his lips kissing the pavement. Jaehyun did not waste anytime, he grabbed your hand and secured you behind him.

“I dare you to touch her again,” He said coolly when the man slowly pulled himself up. There was anger and embarrassment in his face. You thought he’d swing a punch towards Jaehyun as vengeance but he only looked at him with wary, then dashed away.

Behind Jaehyun, you feel smaller than you are. Because of your own imbecility, he landed himself on trouble again. You just wanted a harmless night of enjoying yourself, but seeing where your little endeavor ended elicited a wistful sigh past your lips.

Jaehyun stared down at you, his shadows overruling your height. You hate that he could make you feel worse and defeated than you already are.

“Stupid.”

One word. One word and all the thank yous that you wanted to tell him faded out in an instant like the gust of wind in the summer. It’s unfair, to feel this chagrined towards the man who apparently saved you from an imminent danger yet you couldn’t help yourself but to lash out on him.

“Stupid?” —you asked, and you wanted your lips to stop there, but it didn’t—“Yes! I know that! But I think it’s cruel to say that to my face when I literally was inches away from getting assaulted! At least show some comfort, Jaehyun!” The words were whiplash savage, hopefully to shake him off his callous self.

One step. That’s all it took for Jaehyun to close the gap between the both of you. You tried to stare him down, not letting him see that standing this close to him makes your knees turn jelly and your bones to become brittle inside you.

“Raise your voice towards me again, and I’m gonna give you a real reason to scream.” His face and his voice doesn’t give away any emotions, but it made you flustered anyway.

You hate it. You hate the way that he could get to you every time you think that you could best him and his emotions. You hate it when he talks to you slatternly yet your body couldn’t help but tingle in his every words. You hate it whenever he brushes you off like a fly, yet you couldn’t help but melt into his touch. You hate it when he swears, yet you couldn’t help but pull him closer whenever he kisses you like he’d never sate himself. And it drives you crazy.

He walks ahead of you now, not giving a fuck about your existence again. You tried to match his step, but you need to split your legs first to match his strides. And your intoxicated state made everything worse. Your eyes are drooping and you feel hot everywhere. Cursing the liquor for your state, you shambled your way towards the hotel’s entrance, oblivious of the step that resulted to your cheek kissing the earth.

“Ouch!”

“Truly stupid,”

You heard Jaehyun mumbled before helping you stand and scooping you swiftly in his arms in a bridal style. If your face isn’t ruddy enough because of the alcohol, you’d bet Jaehyun would think that his chivalrous side made you blush— which is true, but you’d thank the intoxicants for that.

When you reached your room, he carefully laid you on your feet, demanding for the keys. You carelessly fished for it inside your little bag, turning it upside down, resulting for all its content to spill on the floor. Jaehyun sighed, clearly on his edge, but he picked up all your things and place it back on your bag. The click of the door reverberated through the silent corridors, and you wobbled inside, palming the switch that’d turn on the lights, but to no avail.

The moonlight infiltrated your room, slightly illuminating your bed. You walked towards it, feeling Jaehyun’s presence behind you.

“Hey!” You laughed, the alcohol kicking in your system now. He raised a brow, but strides towards you nonetheless.

You grabbed his hand, pulling him with you to the mattress, “Thank you!”

You haven’t realized that he’s on top of you and your face are mere inches away from each other. Maybe it’s your blurred vision, or the little light provided by the moon— but did Jaehyun blush? You would see it easily if he did. The bright red would stand starkly against his pale face.

His face. You dared touch his face then, expecting him to slap your hand away and walk out of the room— but he didn’t. He let you hold his face, his eyes fluttering from the sensation, a ghost of a smile creeping up his lips. Then you ran your fingers on his red lips— so inviting, so captivating.

“Who did your lips?” You asked, “I need to know who your surgeon is!”

You leaned forward and bite his lip, which elicited a groan from him. Laughing, you tried to push him, but the hard muscles on his chest were taut.

“Do that again,” He whispers on your lips, the mint of his breath wafting your nose.

“Oh no, we’re gonna do something we’d prolly regret tomorrow,” You chuckled, and bit his lips once again.

This time, he didn’t let you push him away. He kissed you, with enough fervor that sent jolts on your body automatically. His lips were hungry against yours, as they always are whenever you kiss. There’s biting, clashing of teeth against teeth, and there was licking. You couldn’t hold yourself back, not when he kisses you like you’re a goddess. He parted your lips to suck your tongue and you let him. Every suck of his mouth leaves you breathless, but you want more. More than this.

You spread your hips then, allowing him access on your center. He gets the notice in an instant, then he started to grind on you. You gasped underneath him, feeling tingles on your lower abdomen. He continued to kiss you passionately, only to move on and started kissing your jaw, and on the sweet spot on your neck. You’ve got a fistful of his hair tangled on your hands now, but he doesn’t seem to feel the pain on his scalp as he continues to ravenously kiss you while still grinding on you.

You felt your own wetness against your panties, your center begging to be touched.

“Jaehyun,” You said, out of breath.

He suddenly stopped and looked at you, like he’s gotten out of a bubble, “As much as I want you naked right now, I won’t fuck you intoxicated chérie.”

You look at him askance, “You’ll leave me like this?” By your words, you felt your center pulsating, making you even more hotter than you already are.

“Y/N,” He said your name with careful tones, “I don’t want you to regret anything tomorrow,”

You shake your head. And you don’t even know why the hell do you insist. But in his eyes, even though you couldn’t see well because of the light, you know he wants this as much as you want to.

“Jaehyun… I know you want this.”

He sighs, frustrated, “Yes, chérie. I bloody want to fuck you senseless right now. I’ve been wanting to since that day I kissed you on your living room.” He’s holding both your cheeks now, his breath coming out ragged.

You couldn’t believe your ears. Jaehyun wants you. He bloody does. Him, admitting it made the fire inside you burn brighter.

You grabbed him, fuck tomorrow and fuck everything. “Fuck me senseless then,”

Jaehyun groans, he gave you a ravenous kiss before unclothing himself, the only thing covering him now is his boxers. And oh, isn’t he beautiful? The perfectly sculpted muscles of his chest down to his abdomen made your mouth go dry, and the V cascading down his glory tells you it would be a painful night. This isn’t your first time, but it is your first time seeing a huge penis such as his.

He wasted no time to undress you too, but he was gentle as a man who walks with a walking stick. Every reveal of skin made his breath hitch— desire flickering in his eyes, and amazement. But he didn’t say anything, just kiss your lips again.

His lips travels down your neck, where he sucked on the sweet spot that he made sure would leave a mark tomorrow. While he does, his hands travels around your body— feeling your soft mounds on his palm. Then he popped his mouth on your other nipple, sending your body into frenzy. It’s been so long since you’ve done this that you already forgot the feeling. He took turns sucking on your nipples while massaging the other. And you palmed him against his boxers as he does do. He shivered, mouth against your ear.

“Don’t do that, chérie. I don’t wanna come all over your hand.”

You blushed— hard. And he chuckles by your gob-smocked reaction. He continued his penetration on your breasts, stopping only when he felt your wetness on his knees himself.

“Naughty,” He whispered on your ear, tickling you. Slowly, agonizingly, he peeled of your panties off you and his boxers off him—his glory slapping on his stomach as he did so. His length made you gulp. You’ve never imagined him to be that huge. He couldn’t seem to notice your awe because he slowly pulled your legs towards him, feeling your wetness on his fingers. His touch sent you writhing on the bedsheets, wanting for more.

“Patience,” He licks his fingers then, making sure you’re eye to eye as he licks your liquid clean off his fingers.

He leaned towards you, the head of his penis poking your entrance. He whispered, so husky and so raspy that you melt. “Can you lift your hips for me, chérie?”

You exhaled, doing his command slowly. He held your hips, slowly guiding you towards him. Then you felt it. First, poking your entrance. Second, slowly pushing inside you. Third, his wholeness is on you. You gasped.

He groans, “So tight and so fucking wet for me.”

His words alone could send you to your climax. He picked up his pace but he’s still pushing in and out of you slowly, giving you time to adjust to his length. He realized that the tightness is unusual, and you felt it too. Your walls stretching open slowly, tearing the muscles that made you shut your eyes. It wasn’t as painful as the first time, but the pain is still there. Jaehyun steadily push himself in and out of you for a minute or two, before you told him to pick up his pace, which he oblige with a nod.

Now you couldn’t help but scream his name for he fucks you like there’s no tomorrow. His hands on both sides of your head, his every thrust digging you deeper on to the mattress. Your toes curl, and you lifted your hips, wanting to feel more of him.

Jaehyun grunts, his sweats dropping on your chest and on your face. His eyes are shut, feeling everything. You clenched around him, sending him to moan your name into the darkness.

“So… fucking… beautiful.” He curses while looking at you, both of your bodies bouncing against the mattress. You cling on to his shoulders then, your hands feeling something bumpy on his back— like two long gashes of scars— near his shoulder blades. What is it? You shake off the questions, there’s time for that.

Jaehyun continued thrusting on you until you felt a tingle in your lower abdomen, cascading down your clit, “Jae— Jaehyun, I’m near—”

By your words, he pulled out of you, a sudden emptiness you felt in your system. But it was short-lived as he guided you towards the window and whispers, “Bend over, chérie.”

You did as you were told, the gloaming greeting you as you bend over the window. Jaehyun inserted himself on you the second you oblige his command, eliciting a gasp from the both of you. The feeling of being fulfilled came back in an instant.

Then he’s grabbing your hair, your shoulders, your upper body; his one hand wrapped around your breast, twirling on your nipple as he fucks you behind.

The horizon is gleaming in red, the sun will shine soon. And the view is spectacular. Here you are, in London, being fucked mercilessly by a man named Jung Jaehyun. You felt your clit pulsate, your climax approaching.

“Jaehyun!” You screamed at the top of your lungs as you felt your climax tore through your body— your mind went blank from the pleasure. Your body trembled in his grasp. Suddenly, the galaxy seemed so near you could grab it.

Then you felt Jaehyun tensed behind you, a loud groan escaping his lips.

“Fuck!” He shuddered. And the whole room were instantly filled with your heavy breathings.

You could feel your knees wobbling, Jaehyun catching you before you fall on the floor. He laid you carefully on the bed before wiping off the liquid off your sexes, the tissues touching your clit made you shudder a bit, still high on your climax. He tucked you on the thick sheets after cleaning both of you, “Sleep well, chérie.” He mumbled against your hair.

Perhaps it was exhaustion and the intoxication that drove you easily to slumber. But before you drift in complete blackness, you felt Jaehyun kissing your shoulder— tucking you closer to his body.

—

An unexpected headache hit you the moment you opened your eyes, the sunlight glinting on the skies above, its gleam infiltrating your room straight to your vision, making you squint.

The sheets wrapped around your naked body and the scattered clothes on the floor reminded you of what happened last night. A smile creep in your lips as you remember the memories.

Jaehyun was nowhere to be found, but the space he took on the bed was still warm in your palms, a sign that he just got out of bed. You supposed he’s back on his own room, taking a shower since the schedule tells you that today is the day you’d come back home.

Wincing by the pain in your head, you wrapped the sheets tighter on your body then you stand up and trudge towards the window. The memory of the gloaming coating the whole sky earlier came back on your mind, with it the feeling of Jaehyun’s hands grasping your body like he never wanted to let go. His groans and his moans whispering like a phantom wind on your ear as you inhale the sweet air of London.

You were somber as you look at everything around you. From the pavement, to the trees, the flowers and the clear blue sky— a dream come true. I’ll be back, you whispered. There was something familiar tugging you in the atmosphere, yet you couldn’t explain what is it.

The door creaked open, revealing a freshly bathed Jaehyun. He doesn’t smile when you meet his eyes, and he didn’t need to show or tell you about last night to know that he remembers— his eyes could absolutely do the work. It amazes you how much emotions his eyes could conjure— it’s like a glass, mirroring his feelings even though he doesn’t express them with words. But the wrath underneath his irises remains no matter how much emotions his eyes could handle.

“Morning,” He softly mumbled, and you repeated the words to him. You notice that he’s holding something behind him.

“What are you carrying?”

By your words, his ears started to redden. You find it adorable— Jaehyun blushing. But you decided not to tease him about it, afraid that you’d ruin the mood. And you’re absolutely sure that he won’t take it kindly once you point it out. He shifted, conspicuously uncomfortable.

When he didn’t answer, you push him a little bit. “Is that for me?” you cooed. His ears are crimson red now. You bite your lips to stop yourself from giggling.

Here he is, your boss, the CEO of a prestigious company, Jung Jaehyun, red as a tomato in front of you. Never in a million years you’ve imagined this to happen. You walked towards him, clutching the sheets on your body. But what’s the point? He has seen everything already. Yet the way his eyes roamed up and down your wrapped body still made the hairs on your neck prickle. He’s looking at you like he doesn’t know what lay underneath the sheets.

“Wear this.” He pushed the gift on your chest that you struggled to catch it for your one hand is busy clutching the sheets to keep you covered.

“What’s this? It’s not something scandalous, right?” You asked, peeking on the insides of the gift.

Jaehyun sighed, “Just… wear it. We have someplace to go to,” Then he’s gone to his own room.

You frown, you thought you’re going home today. But it seems like Jaehyun has another business to go to. You quickly unwrapped the gift, a flowy dress with little flowers all over is the content of it, accompanied with a little note.

I hope you don’t regret anything, chérie. Because I don’t. – J

The note locked you in your place, mouth slightly gaping from the message. You knew it. You knew he doesn’t regret a single thing. Yet his assurance made everything better— even clear as the waters of the lake glinting in the sunlight. And you feel like floating on the same water like a driftwood, unaware of where shore you’d land on, yet enjoying the thrill of the waters still.

You rinse yourself, lathering your hair with shampoo. The places where Jaehyun touched you— worshipped you— last night tingles as you trace them, feeling his calloused yet careful hands against your skin. Was it a dream? Everything that’s happened?  If it was, you pray that you experience it again. And yet you remember that your dreams holds trapped mysteries like the smoke in a crystal ball, too obscured to be understood.

Aurora. Knowing nothing aside from the woman’s appearance left you incomplete— like she was a phantom limb missing in your body, and only knowing something other than her blue eyes would complete you. Who are you? You asked, debating whether to nag about it to Jaehyun again. But you have no wish to ruin the building bond you’re starting with him, you do not want to infuriate him, or yourself if ever he doesn’t answer again. Perhaps in the right time, you’d know everything. But not now. Not when you don’t have any clue of what’s to come the moment your questions are all answered.

You’re certain about one thing, though. And that’s whatever your role might be in this chain of a story, it’s not a flowery path that you’d enjoy. You feel something destructive lying ahead and on the end of this dream, but right now, you’d let yourself run and be a coward for a while.

—

Paris, France. Every woman’s dream. And now you couldn’t contain your self as you spin around the place.

Jaehyun didn’t give away any clue when you were inside his private plane that arrived earlier. Private plane, yes. The truthiness of it made you appalled, like a fish blobbing in the sea. You just knew that you’re already in Paris when you saw the tiny Eiffel Tower from above the clouds.

Everything seemed so serene and peaceful— and you supposed it’s because of the statue of St. Michael standing proudly on the grounds of Place Saint-Michel in 6th arrondissement.

You aren’t a pious lady, but your mother was. That’s why you know the rosary and the prayers of Ave Maria. You and your little sister, Yuqi, would kneel beside her every night before dinner to whisper the prayers alongside her. As a child, you’d always tripped on your words, eliciting a giggle from Yuqi and a glare from your mother. But even though she’d give you a sharp scolding afterwards, you’d never trade the memory for the world.

Jaehyun offered you his right hand, “Come.”

That was his first word after you departed the plane and on the way here. You haven’t yet asked him why did he choose this place to go to. He was so quiet on the way— the kind of silence that you’re so accustomed to— the silence that tells he doesn’t want to talk to anybody.

You take his hand, your palms easily covered by his large ones. Holding hands and walking with your lover in the grounds of Paris was one of your lifetime dreams— and now it’s happening. Your heart couldn’t stop from beating loudly in your chest. But is he your lover? You couldn’t claim him yet, and you don’t know if he’d like that idea. Perhaps you’re stupid, to revel in this feeling, but your heart feels utterly safe whenever you’re with him. Even though Jaehyun is as complicated as a twisted rope, there’s a tug that continues to pull you towards him. As much as you want to understand where it is coming from, there’s a voice in the back of your mind that tells you not to worry about anything. You feel like the ocean water, whenever it flows around the world, it’d still come home in the shores.

“Is that a statue of Archangel Michael?” You asked, wonderment visible on your face.

You’re not good in architecture, but the intricate design of the Renaissance style pediment awed you. It contains of a tablet, the year 1860 inscribed in Roman numerals on its surface. At the central niche, you’d see the statue of Archangel Michael winning a combat against the devil.

“Wow. That must be Lucifer,”

You pointed at the other statue underneath the Archangel. Jaehyun’s grip on you tightened, making you snap your head at him. His face carried no emotions, but his eyes— you couldn’t see them at your position beside him. But he’s looking straight at the statue, like he’s reminiscing an old memory.

“But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the sinner that needed it most?” Jaehyun said while still looking at the statue. “A quote I’ve read somewhere,” he added when he noticed that you were quiet beside him.

You grew up knowing the stories in the Bible, it has many mysteries, and it’s not perfect. But it molded your little five-year-old heart into the woman that you are now. Looking at Jaehyun, and hearing his quote reminded you of your mother again, and how she taught you not to judge those who has different beliefs than you. You wonder if Jaehyun is one of those people.

“Are you sympathizing with the devil right now?” You asked, careful not to sound insulting. Religion is the one thing you have no idea how to talk with to other people. Asking Jaehyun feels like you’re walking on a thin thread.

He didn’t answer for a minute or two, just continues to hold your hand in every minute that passes. When he does, it was brief and almost breathless, “Yes.”

You inhaled, “May I know why?”

You waited for his sharp reiteration, but none came. Instead, his voice was lacking of life. “Because no one did. No one does,” Then he was silent again.

“Didn’t he betray God?” You regretted the words the moment it slid past your lips. The voice of your mother scolding you for being nosy repeating in your mind. But again, Jaehyun’s voice was toneless. His eyes seems to look at a vestige of something that is long gone.

“Did he, really? Or did I just loved him too much?”

I? But before you could ask him about it, he dragged you away from the statue. Three steps away from it, he turned around and whispered.

“Farewell, brother.”

You almost didn’t hear it. But you were certain you heard him call the statue of the Archangel ‘brother’. You’re supposed to shrug it off and leave him be, but there was hopelessness and longing in his eyes that made you inquisitive.

“Did you just call the statue your brother?”

His mouth opened up and said something, but you didn’t hear the words because of the loud wailing of a child nearby.

—

“Did you just call the statue your brother?”

He doesn’t look at you when he answered, afraid that his eyes might give away his emotions. “Yes. Because he’s indeed my brother. Once.”

Jaehyun hated it. He hated the truth that no matter how many millennia he rots in Earth, the loneliness of not being with his brothers doesn’t disappear. If not, it only makes him more of a sinner. The wanting to fight and win wars with them eats him up like a disease, suffusing all his ability to be sane. Perhaps he was crazy, delusional, to even hang on the little hope that he feels in his heart. Of the hope that one day, he’d spread his wings and fly again into heaven. Yet every time he remembers Aurora, he’s reminded of the punishment on his shoulders.

It angers him still— to think that Aurora lived a life meant to cease— that she lived a life as a vessel to punish the Fallen; him. Albeit realizing the truth, he still loved her with all that he is. And where did that lead her? Into her own doom.

And as he looked at you now, he couldn’t help but feel guilty for what he’s doing. Is this love? He questions himself every night, much more so after that night you shared.  Yet an uncertain feeling that maybe you aren’t one of his punishment makes him want to hold you closer, tighter, longer. Could he risk it? Could he risk you? He couldn’t seem to bear the thought of you withering away from him— yet that is the only way to keep you safe, protected.

He’s thought about you all night, not even a blink of sleep visited him. He’s thought about how beautiful you’d looked in Johnny’s party with your tulle dress and intricate coiffure. And the dance you shared— there’s nothing in this world who could take that memory away from him. It reminds him of Aurora, and their dance that night in her father’s fête. It was familiar yet different at the same time. The thought of her made him froze, remembering how you asked about Aurora sparked a frisson of fear in him. Why are you so eager to know anything about her? There’s a sense of foreboding in your every question about Aurora that made Jaehyun uneasy.

He laid awake beside you, watching your face as you drift off to sleep, while sundries of thoughts occupies his mind. He wonders what kinds of dreams visits you whenever you close your eyes? Is it about him? The thought of you dreaming about him etched a smile on his lips. Yet he’s been cruel to you to even deserve that.

He knows that he must be crueler and put an end to this stupidity. He couldn’t hurt you, no. He’s done a lot of destruction to the people around him already and he couldn’t bear the idea of you hurting because of him. Whether you’re not a part of his punishment, he knows that letting himself fall for you would lead only to your own ruination. That’s why he made up his mind. What he feels for you, he’s determined not to let it eat him up— he’s determined to crush it if it means your safety.

He once had become selfish, and that remissness only resulted to his own heart being shattered and the death of his lover. It’s hard to move on, and it’s harder to forget. One hundred years, the memory still clings to him; Aurora’s skin and bones slowly wilting to the state of emaciation. All of it was his fault. It was his fault because he didn’t guard his heart enough.

It was waggish, Jaehyun thinks. He was a warrior of heaven— his heart unfailingly comes second to his mind. That’s what he’s learned as God’s soldier. Yet he couldn’t believe that the little thing full of veins and arteries inside his body would be his forever retribution.

He wanted to capture the moment every time he’s with you. Specially now, while you innocently eat an ice cream in your hand, strands of your hair loosing from your bun and billowing against the wind. But he knows keeping you there would only ruin you. Everything about him is truly twisted— from the way that he treated you with his actions and with his words. But the fire inside you never once wavered whenever you’re with him. Unlike him, you do not let yourself have grudges towards anyone. Everything for you is a river that flows freely. But Jaehyun, he is a tsunami of feelings, ready to destroy anyone and anything on his wake. There’s simply no way to extricate himself from his nature and damnation.

A strand of hair strayed on your face, he tucked it behind your ear as he watched you with adoration in his eyes. “Are you fond of angels?”

He blamed himself for your question. Perhaps he was overwhelmed by seeing the statue of Archangel Michael earlier, and perhaps you’ve seen it in his eyes. He knows the question isn’t meant to harm him but it overwrought him even so.

He nodded, “You could say that,”

He was fond of angels, of course. Because he’s one of them. Even though the rules of his damnation kept him tied to Earth, the wings in his back and the ichorous blood that runs in his veins still stand as an attestation of his angelic identity. No one could take that from him.

You smiled sheepishly at him, your eyes reflecting something he couldn’t quite understand. Your irises conjures a secret he wanted to know, yet it’s obvious that you would tell him soon. But there is no soon left for the both of you. After this day, he knows you’d come back and hate him again. He knows he no longer would see the stars in your eyes and the constellations in it. He knows he won’t kiss you and hear the prayers on your lips again. He won’t be allowed to thread his fingers against the finest silk that is your hair. The star between you two would die even before it is born. And he forces himself to think that that is for the best.

—

“That’s… wonderful, sis.” Yuqi commented as she entered your room with a bag of chips in hand.

You just came back from Paris yesterday, with a bag of memories that you’d treasure for the rest of your life. The last day was by far the best trip you’ve ever had. You explored half of Paris’ tourist attractions, dined in their famous restaurants, and slept with a five-star hotel with Jaehyun. Surprisingly, he allowed himself to sleep with the same room as you. But nothing happened. And no pillowtalks was shared. Jaehyun’s not that type of man, he made sure of that. Yet the silence that you shared together was still enough to make you happy. You stared with each other, smiling, your eyes talking, and him kissing your forehead before you fall asleep. It was enough, and it was perfect.

“Is it, though?” You raised your brow at your sister, popping a handful of chips in your mouth.

Knowing about Jaehyun’s fondness of angels, especially of fallen angels, you decided to give the painting you’re working on on his birthday. Even though it is not originally your idea, the familiar tug in your heart tells you that Jaehyun won’t mind. And you have to trust your intuition. It is better than nothing.

“Yes. Never really thought you to be a Renaissance girl,”

“That’s literally my style, Yuqi.” You told her and she shrugged. “You’re not really giving much attention to your big sis’ art life.” You jokingly frowned at her. Yuqi gathered the softest pillow and hit you with it.

“If you don’t remember, I am currently specializing in finance. That is like, what, poles away from your profession.”

“Whatever.”

She shifted on her seat, “You said that’s not a commission. What’s that for, then? Don’t tell me we’d just hang that piece in our walls. I mean, yes, we could. But I know you won’t let that painting sit in this apartment.”

“Why? What’s wrong with our apartment? And I still don’t know what to do with it. Maybe give it to someone else?” That is not a ‘maybe’. You’d really give it to someone, but you’re unready to discuss the idea of gifting Jaehyun with your art to your sister.

“Someone? Who is that someone?” She chivvied. You shrugged and laugh at her. There’s no way you’d tell her.

Yuqi stayed in your room for the whole day, eating and binging dramas while you work on your canvas. Finally, you could envision how it’d turn out. Thankfully, it’s turning out the same as the one in your dream.

Then Aurora’s face flashed in your mind. Wherever she is, would she condemn you for recreating her artwork? It suddenly felt wrong, to give this to Jaehyun. How twisted it is. That the same girl who constantly appears in your dreams is connected to the people you work with in real life. The sudden realization hit you like a tidal wive. It is real. And it feels wrong to remind Jaehyun of Aurora somehow through her painting.

You tugged on your hair, blowing out a frustrated sigh because of your lack of common sense. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Yet letting the almost-finished canvas to rot in the corner of your room is worse than finishing it. Maybe you’d come up with another gift to give Jaehyun.

But why am I thinking about this too much? Why am I so invested in pleasing Jaehyun when he haven’t even texted nor called me for two days?

You shrugged and kept all your art materials. Demanding for a simple hi nor hello from Jaehyun is what you call absurdity. The bed is specially inviting tonight and dwelling on your ridiculous thoughts won’t help you get the paycheck tomorrow and pay the bills. Even though you fear for the dreams to visit you again, you have a work that would need your productivity tomorrow so you decided to sleep.

Your name— it’s being uttered by different voices; there is the voice of a child, of a woman, and that of an old person. What is happening?

“Please, wake up.” They say.

Then you heard the sobs, echoing through the whole house. The house is huge, it’s like a labyrinth of corridors. Gathering your white dress, you spin around, trying to locate the voices. The whole house seemed to gyrate in every step that you take, muffling the cries and the pleas.

You flit to nowhere, but the voices are getting louder every time you open the wrong door. It’s like an endless hallway and the cries are getting disconcerting, begging for you to find it. A huge oak door greeted you at the end of the hallway, and with your heart thundering against your chest, you pushed it open.

The room is familiar— it’s the same room where you found the canvas. A kneeling family around a queen-sized bed welcomed you as you fully entered the room. Their hands are clasped with rosaries, obviously praying.

“Hello?”

They don’t seem to hear you. You walked closer towards the bed. A frail body resting on it, her bones are jutting out and her skin looked ashen. Her chests, the way it rises and falls gave you a preposterous goosebumps.

“Y/N!”

You covered your mouth. It was Aurora. The hair. But why are they calling her with your name?

“Y/N, don’t die!” The little girl screamed, river of tears flowing on her cheeks.

The sight made your heart sunk. They are all crying, begging, praying. Yet no one seems to hear them.

“I’m sorry, Aurora.”

You whirled your head to see Jaehyun standing on the corner. He looked so hopelessly defeated. Red rimmed his eyes, with fresh tears coming out of it. He’s crying, and he’s the only one who doesn’t call Aurora by your name.

What is going on? Is this why he doesn’t want to talk about her? Because she’s dead?

But when did she die?

—

“I… had a dream.”

Yuqi continued eating, but she told you to go on by nodding.

The dreams, they are not as friendly as you think they would be. They keep on coming, getting more and more peculiar every time they visit you in your sleep, to the point that searching and reading articles about it on Google couldn’t help you anymore. They are bottling up inside your chest, and you have a jarring feeling that any time soon, they would burst.

“About… about a girl. I always dream about her. In different places… and I think she’s not from our year. Her clothes, the way she carries herself— she reminds me of a princess. Or… a lady.” You haven’t thought that opening it up to your sister would be this hard. Your words are twisting and trampling on their own.

“Have you searched about it yet?”

“Yes. Search engines couldn’t even help me in this one.”

“Maybe a fortune teller could help.”

Fortune teller? Where on earth could you find one in this modern society? You sighed, promising yourself not to tell anybody about it again. Yuqi seemed disinterested about the whole notion, and you wished you could be like her too.

—

Mind wandering off to different places, you trekked inside Jung’s Fiscals. The voices and the cries of Aurora’s family echoing in your mind elicited a grimace from you. They felt so in pain. And you know that kind of pain— the kind of pain when you lost someone dear to you.

“Y/N!”

“Morning, Soo.”

“What’s wrong? That type of face wasn’t what I was expecting from a London girl!” She teased.

You tried to smile and laugh with her, telling her stories about your trip all the way to the elevator. But before you got inside, she turned you to face her. “Mr. Jung has already arrived… with a girl.”

A girl? You blinked, wondering who she might be. But then you remembered that Chaelin is a girl and she’s friends with Jaehyun. Soojin probably doesn’t know her and you have no time to ask her about the girl’s appearance. So you shrugged off the unsettling feeling in your system and gave Soojin a quick peck on the cheek before stepping in the elevator.

Once inside, you fished your phone in your pocket. A text from Jaehyun was displayed on the screen.

[Bring two cups of coffee once you arrived.]

You frowned at the message. That’s it? No good morning or take care?

After cleaning off your desk and checking for anything amiss, you walked towards the kitchen to make Jaehyun and his guest cups of coffee. Him, arriving before you was unusual. What could possibly be the reason? You shrugged and did his command, setting the hot coffees on the tray.

You balanced the tray in your arms, careful not to spill the coffee. The door clicked, you pushed it open by swaying your hips.

You breathed, “Good—”

And all of your efforts to be careful were washed down by a cold bucket of reality as you stare at the scene in front of you.

The girl from Jaehyun’s penthouse. She’s pressed against the wall, legs wrapped around Jaehyun’s waist. She’s almost naked, with Jaehyun kissing her like there’s no tomorrow. He grasps her waist and her breast, earning a moan from her.

Your arms wobbled. And the next thing you heard was the shattering of the coffee mugs against the floor, together with your heart.

[secretadventuresociety]

Episode 27 Recap

What’s up SASholes?! I’m Bren; resident SAStorian and note-taker extraordinaire. Welcome to Episode 27: Under New Management.

The Xarus Problem

We last left off with Kess staring down her jilted ‘lover’ (I mean, if you can call an arranged husband a lover), Xarus, who had just revealed he now owns her childhood home. Well, I say home. I guess childhood MANSION is technically more correct. Anyway, as this red-headed scum delights in Kess’ confusion, a flock of guards file in behind him all dressed in black; anticipating an attack. True to form, Pearce leans over to Kess and asks if he should shoot him, and she waves him away, blowing the whole thing off as a joke. Turns out that ole Xarus lost his humor in a tragic Born-Without-A-Soul accident, so he stares back flatly and invites the group to dinner; suggesting the trio clean up beforehand.

Kess loudly announces that her mother (Norse), Zev, Kü, and Pearce are going to… help… brush her hair? And Xarus just accepts it?? So the definitely-not-suspect group file up to Kess’ bedroom, led by Norse. The party takes in their spotless lavish surroundings in a mixture of disgust and disbelief-- and then they find their destination. The room might as well be adorned with a neon sign reading ‘Messy Kessy’. The colors inside are dark and earthy, with flora and drawings of fauna littering the walls, lit by a majestic bay window. In an awkward silence, Kü compares the living space to the shit-covered walls of his cavern home, then switches gears to ask if all fathers come with so much tension.

Norse gently explains that Xarus isn’t Kess’ father, but was her husband-to-be, who recently took over the house and the super-secret ‘family business’. Surprise-- Kess’ family is a band of merry Robin Hoods who keep Mardosta eating with silver spoons. Despite being there the whole time— Norse doesn’t quite understand how the boring, ginger-haired square of a man grew the balls to overthrow their reign of thievery; but she momentarily morphs into fantasy Vin Diesel (not actually, I know it’s a little weird ‘cause technically she’s a changeling and very much COULD do that) and tells Kess they can handle it As A Family.

An Iris by Any Other Name

After assuring The Nobodies aren’t going to kill Xarus in his sleep, Mama Shadowmore pulls Kess aside and leads her to the family greenhouse. It smells overwhelmingly like smoke, and as they enter, Kess sees hundreds of her black and white flowers. You know the ones. Norse then tells her how they tried to cover Kess’ absence, the way she would go into the greenhouse to just sit somewhere that smelled like her daughter (OUCH, dude), and all about the first night she saw one of the Irises appear. From that night on, Norse and Kess’ father Arthur would sit and wait for a flower to bloom; knowing somehow it was connected to their daughter’s safety. Now, if you thought your teeth were rotting out from the sweetness already-- that’s when Kess hugs her mom for the first time in years, and sometime during the embrace, Norse drops her high elf facade and embraces her daughter in all her changeling glory before Kess grows a flower just for her. Touching stuff. You crying yet? No? Just me?

Dry those eyes, though, because now we’re on to some shenanigans. As Kess and her mom are off repairing their relationship, Pearce and Kü attempt to make themselves at home. After grabbing a drink with Zev, the pair stake out a guest bedroom with an adjoining bathroom. Pearce ushers Kü inside and offers to guard the door as he showers, which the kobold has CERTAINLY done before. Tons of times. In his underground home. Despite this setback, Kü figures out the tub quickly, but the challenge becomes when he needs to drain the water. He finds a bucket, remembers that the toilet gets rid of its own fluid, and scoops up the grimy bathwater like a scaly Mickey Mouse. But that’s not all. Getting to the bottom of the tub, he notices a chain floating in the dregs and hauls out a crowbar to liberate it.

Pearce, hearing a sudden thump and fearing a sneak attack, manhandles his way into the bathroom and finds a wet Kü who laments about the ‘necklace’ at the bottom of the tub. The gunslinger quickly realizes it’s a chain for the drain (heh, a rhyme) and shoves Kü out. He then takes a pile of Zev’s clothes he found and dresses, appalled at the deep-v tunic and skin tight leather pants he is now sporting. Being his only choice, he chastely covers his bare chest and spikes his hair, coming out of the bathroom to help Kü shine his helmet. Yes, that helmet. Pearce is making Mother’s skull GLEAM. Kess, after realizing she could just change her form in lieu of ACTUALLY bathing, brings Kü a long silk tunic to replace his dress and steals a white button-up from her dad for Pearce. Now they’re Awkward Dinner Party ready!

Evil Exes, Amirite?

In case you’ve forgotten, Kess has a Brady-Bunch-worthy family. She runs into her dad, and later all three of her brothers: Zev, his twin Voss, and Rook. However, these aren’t all of the introductions the party is subjected to. As they enter the dining room in what I can only imagine is Oh My God They’re So Hot Slow Motion (with Kess donning her owl, Tibbins, for intimidation), they lay eyes on an unfamiliar and unimpressed elven woman who Xarus introduces as Sienna-- his current fiance. Well, he sure did move on fast. Between Sienna’s eye rolls, Kü’s harried feasting, and EVERYONE’S overwhelming discomfort, Xarus describes how he grew suspicious when Kess disappeared. After a little digging, he found out about the family’s arrangement with the city’s mayor, Vendreth; how he caught her criminal parents and promised them protection if they used their forces to help his failing city thrive.

Kess doesn’t see any issue, but Xarus laments that the townspeople have no idea who is running the show. It’s a clear threat, as Kess realizes the denizens would run them out of Mardosta if they knew the truth. Happy with himself and his mind games, Xarus invites his elven mistress to retire to their chambers with him…. if you know what I mean. She emotionlessly agrees, and the two leave the family alone. The Nobodies excitedly chatter about their exploits; no adventure going untold. Kü even introduces his mother, Marrow, and spends a moment praising Norse for being a good mother too. Pearce changes the subject to their treasure map, showing it briefly to Voss. He has no idea what the X’s could mean, but implores them to keep him updated. Norse then asks how long the party is staying-- enticing them with an upcoming festival that is SURE to have stickmeat. Kess proposes they stay for a while, saying they could make use of the family library and also figure out what the X closest to Mardosta hides.

Pearce not-so-subtly asks about the family’s trading habits, mostly trying to gauge if they have any dealings with his absent father. Turns out this ain’t an arms race, it’s a goddamn scene, and with routes halted in Larsham and Evercrest, the business has slowed down to a trickle. Kess breaks the business talk with a proposal for her companions and her siblings to go out on the town, and so they all prepare for a night in Mardosta. Pearce grabs his gun, Kess raids Rook’s training room for daggers (noticing a hefty potion collection), and everyone bundles up for the biting weather as they walk to the docks.

The Return of Nice Ghost

Kü spots a stationary boat in the water, with a rumpled dragonborn climbing out of it. Sus. As they get closer, they notice that it’s not a boat at all, but a disguised opening to a meeting spot called ‘The Underfrost’. Kess leads them down the cavernous tunnel lined with torches until they reach the bottom. Once there, they feast their eyes on merchants, a bar, and an imposing fighting pit-- all teeming with figures of all races. Kü jumps on the chance to, as he so eloquently describes it, ‘fuck shit up’; racing off with Voss and Zev in tow to sign up to battle. Kess instructs Pearce to place bets for the both of them as she grabs drinks… which turns out to be a monumentally bad idea. Pearce throws down 500 gold on Kü for himself but-- without express instructions from the druid-- dumps out her bag and wagers all of her 1,275 pieces of gold.

It turns out Kü is the next challenger to face… get this… Dickius Muscular. Is it his fantasy God-given name or a stage moniker? The world may never know. In any case, fervent hands push him toward the pit-- one attempting to remove his helmet. In retribution, Kü bites the tip of the offending person’s pinkie off, keeping his adornment as he summons a flood of shadows from it to cover him in armor. Thus the fight begins, and the massive goliath Dick...ius attacks our boy Kücifer with a mace in a blinding rage. Kü retaliates with his Bonemerang-- and when that does less damage that he expected, he summons Nice Ghost to keep him company. The spectral being chases after the goliath relentlessly; booping him any time he can come close. Dickius flees from the spectre, pursuing Kü-- who wreaths himself in shadow and disappears. Out of the darkness comes two fireballs, liberated from the kobold’s dwindling necklace.

Amazingly, this blast does not take his opponent out-- so Kü chugs a health potion as his vision suddenly goes green. He smells smoke and hears Mother in his head, asking to take a turn. He can do nothing but stare at Dickius as the shadows leave Kü to snake around the goliath and squeeze. Though deeply in pain, Dickius breaks free and heaves one last attack at Kü-- rendering him unconscious and sending Nice Ghost back into oblivion. With that, Kess rushes in to heal her friend, momentarily pissed at Pearce for losing all her money. Back on his feet, Kü shakily requests to be taken to bed, and the gunslinger scoops him up like a child and carries him; only to be repaid with a flow of vomit down his back as the kobold recovers slowly from his trauma. Still, Pearce keeps his composure and reassures Kü that he fought well, but begs him to try to sleep.

The Scream Heard ‘Round the Mansion

The group groggily returns to the family home and branches off to their respective rooms. Pearce gently lays Kü down and tucks him into bed before searching for a piece of paper and a writing utensil to pen a short note. He slips 200 gold into it and scrawls ‘I’m sorry’ onto the page. He slips out of the guest room to try and find Kess’ door-- and the one he picks, unbeknownst to him, is her parents’. However, our boy tried his best, so he returns to Kü; watching him as he sleeps. This dad-like worry Pearce has got going on makes me SOFT, y’all. I need MORE.

Kess, however, forgoes sleep for a time and instead grabs a bottle of wine from the kitchen. She takes it to the greenhouse and attempts to grow her second flower of the day-- which she has never done before. It takes a little more effort, but it does sprout, and she pleadingly asks to speak with the friend she grows them for. She waits, but no answer comes. Kess finishes the wine and stumbles up to her room, leaving the window open for good measure. She and Kü are sleeping soundly while Pearce fitfully wakes up from his perch on the sleeper sofa every so often to watch Kü’s chest rise and fall (PASS ME THE TISSUES). During one of his half-awake moments, Pearce watches the candle in the room extinguish and simultaneously hears a scream coming from downstairs.

Leaving the passed out kobold, Pearce takes off, only to be intercepted by Kess, who we all know has the passive perception of a dog waiting for you to drop that pepperoni on your pizza, Karen. She pulls him into the stairwell and they end up at the opening of Xarus’ chambers-- Sienna standing speechless in the doorway. When she ends up being less than helpful, the duo slip into the room, immediately laying eyes on the lifeless body of Kess’ failed groom. I wish I could say I was at all upset about this revelation, but I would be lying to you, dear readers. However, we now have a murder mystery on our hands! WHODUNNIT?!

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TL;DR

Our heroes attended a dinner party more uncomfortable than all of my family reunions put together. Talk about second-hand anxiety!

Kü is the Underfrost Fighting Pit Champion in my heart and I hope he gets a rematch against… *checks notes* the Goliath’s dick.

RIP, Xarus— ex-fiancé and stick in the mud. See you in hell.

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Kess’ed Be and catch the next session over at twitch.tv/lochness on July 21st at 7:30CST/8:30EST! AND if you’d like to watch THIS episode, you can find it at the link below: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyi5JkW-SNY