#vs not wanting a scene given that and i literally do not know where I'm going w this i just want to post it lol sooooo posT

[ereh-emanresu-tresni]

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[deelavis]

I'm sure that some has talked about this before, but I have always been confused about Mello's reasoning for kidnapping Takada. I finished a read through of the Death Note manga recently and I FINALLY feel like I understand why. I'm going to break this down into 2 sections: Why he did it, and Did he intend to die?

Why he did it:

While I think it's meant to be kept somewhat vague for narrative purposes, the thing that I never understood fully was the wording in the scene:

Why specifically "his" name? Of course this line always made my little Meronia heart flutter, but before my manga read through I never quite understood it. If Near's plan to catch Kira went wrong, all of the SPK would die, not just Near. So why the emphasis on him? Especially if we are looking at a completely surface level reading of DN where Mello purely hates Near? But then I found this moment a few chapters earlier:

To summarize what is happening before and after these pages (Chapter 90), Near tells Light that there are 4 members of the SPK and that he is in Japan. He says they might meet soon. This is all coded language to challenge Light to an in person meeting. At this point Near admits that he doesn't have a concrete plan in place for confronting Light. But he knows they must meet Kira face to face and prove his identity by having a name written in the Death Note. This is prior to the SPK starting their investigation into Mikami. The part that stuck out to me was " When we meet Kira, the first person he'll write down is me, so..." To me this means that prior to finding Mikami and adding fake pages to the death note, Near planned to sacrifice himself to catch Kira if they didn't have any other options. This DIRECTLY correlates to Mello's line (read right to left):

Mello kidnapped Takada because he knew that if he didn't there was a good chance Near would die. This is literally the only reason that the text give us. Which leads me to our next part.

Did he intend to die?

While I've seen a lot of different takes on this, many of which I find very interesting, I now believe that yes, Mello kidnapped Takada with the intention to be killed by the death note. Here is my reasoning.

Mello knows better than anyone else investigating Kira how the death note works. Like L wanted to before his death, Mello used his time in the mafia to experiment with the rules of both the death note AND the shinigami eyes.

In the manga, Mello has one of the mafia members Kal Snydar (a.k.a. Jack Neylon) make a deal for the shinigami's eyes. Rod and Mello use Snydar's eyes to kill others for an extended period of time. This would give Mello at least a basic understanding of how they work; what face coverings inhibit the eyes, etc... And then after his encounter with Soichiro Yagami he becomes aware that there is always a chance that anyone associated with Kira could have the eyes. He also knows that Kira knows his name but not his face after the explosion. Meaning that he would know that the ONLY thing stopping Kira from killing him would be his face. Given that Mello never uses the death note himself but had other's use it for him, I believe that he also would theorize that Kira would do the same (such as X-Kira/Mikami, Misa, and Takada). Because of all of this he would be especially careful around anyone he knows has connections to Kira, such as Takada the spokesperson of Kira.

Moving on to the kidnapping. Mello wears a motorcycle helmet that appears to be tinted, but is clear enough to fully discern his face through. We know from previous instances that a dark tinted visor will block the shinigami's eyes from seeing your name, which most motorcycle helmets already have. Here is a comparison of a helmet used to block the face vs what Mello wore:

Mello specially chose one with a clear enough visor to see through. You could argue that he did this to show Halle who he was, allowing him to take Takada. However if this was his intention there were many other ways to make his identity clear to Halle without revealing his face. There is also the line on this page that intrigues me. "She's connected to Kira... Unless I do this..." The sentence structure implies that there is a direct consequence Mello envisions. Unless you do this...then what? Given everything else I have outlined above to me the implication is "Unless I do this then Near will die." You could argue that he’s thinking something like “Unless I do this then Near will win!” However, Mello has always been outspoken in his desire to be the one to catch Kira. If that’s what he was thinking wouldn’t it just say that? Whatever his reason is is something he can’t bring himself to say even in the privacy of his own brain.

If you were to argue that Mello didn't realize that his helmet was clear enough to see his face, this is then made moot when he takes it off in front of Takada. There was no reason for him to do this, in fact, there were a multitude of reasons not to. Even if Takada didn't have death note pages on her, Mello knows that if she escapes, Kira could easily ask her to write his name in the death note because she knows his face. You may then think "but why does Mello take precautions to not get followed and killed by Takada's men? He takes away and ships off anything that could be bugged and tracked including her clothing." This just further proves that he is trying to be killed specifically by the death note. The kidnapping is planned to a T, but he doesn't take the simplest precaution of concealing his face from one of Kira's biggest supporters.

So what was Mello’s plan? We know that Mello is someone who plans for a lot of different contingencies. We see this when he plants bombs through out his safe house in the event that he’s backed into a corner. Because of this I believe he had a few different plans. But no matter what his goal with kidnapping Takada is to force contact with Kira. In fact, Near thinks that Mello’s goal is to use Takada as bait.

What his exact plan was up in the air for me. He may have intended to be killed by her, thinking that she had access to a death note when kidnapped which would explain why he didn’t check her over before giving her the blanket to cover herself. He states that his intention of taking her clothes is to removing any tracers so her bodyguards didn’t find them. They make a deal that he will give her the blanket before taking off her underwear, where she’s hiding her pages of the death note.

Even if Mello didn’t know that you can used pages torn out of the death note, there are a few time in the series when a person hides a full death note under their clothes (Near being my favorite example). So it’s not out of the question that she could have had one tucked into the back of her underwear.

His plan also could have been to release her in some way so that she could get back to Kira and use the death note. Mello knows Kira has his name, now with Takada having seen his face Kira would have her write Mello’s name for him. Or it could have been that he intended to use her to draw Kira out and get killed by the death note in the process.

Going back to our first example from the manga, Near says "The fact that we replaced the pages in the notebook and the notebook happened to be a fake… I find it hard to believe that Mello thought that far ahead." I do agree with Near here. I don't think that Mello had figured out that the notebook was fake. But I do think that Mello could see that Near's plan had holes in it, and any mistake would result in Near getting killed. His solution was to be the name that was written in the book instead. You can argue in a lot of different ways why it was important to Mello that Near lives. Such as, Mello knew that with Near dead he didn't have any hope of catching Kira by himself with all of this resources and allies depleted. Or my favorite reason, despite his protests Mello deeply cares for Near and was willing to die if it meant Near would survive.

Please let me know any of your thoughts!

[areus-in-a-little-cave]

I wanna comment on something I'm seeing that is deeply annoying me again. I am glad to see several posts similar to this, though.

Firstly, please stop acting like this is an "us vs them" situation but making the "them" be people on your own side who aren't responding to things perfectly. The problem is the people defending Wilbur, attacking Shelby, and spreading hate.

Do not take your anger and upset out on other people, because people are going to feel and respond differently but most people are supporting Shelby. It can be hard to see but people are usually trying their best and not trying to hurt others with what they're saying. You can both support Shelby and want Wilbur gone without agreeing on every opinion. Stop harassing people for responding differently to you. If their opinion is harmful, maybe try explaining why instead of harassing.

Secondly, please stop acting like every CC is this deeply evil, deeply toxic, abusive, horrible person because they haven't made a public statement about Shelby's abuse.

[Image ID: A screenshot of Shelby's alt twitter account's liked tweets. The tweet shown is by imiziee, one of Shelby's mods, and is a quote tweet. It reads "pls dont be like this. its been 2 hours since he posted it. people take different times to process that theyve been manipulated and friends with an abuser, calm down. instead of hating on people why dont you show support for shelby?? #ShubbleSupportSquad". The tweet it is quoting reads "the silence from his closest is so damning. fuck philza, tommy, jack, niki, tubbo, charlie, lovejoy, quackity" before it cuts off.]

This is from Shelby's likes, it's written by her mod. Shelby herself then likely agrees that this is a reasonable standpoint.

CCs should be supporting Shelby, of course. They should regardless of how close they are to this. However, we know that Wilbur manipulated people, close friends according to replies we've seen. We don't know what the behind the scenes is right now. Imagine if it was you and your closest friends, who you have known for years, and literal millions were watching you. It might take a few days to come to a conclusion, to say something, and I'd personally rather a CC come in a little late than rush an empty response.

I'm not expecting everyone to be perfect in their response, but a response is a response. Again, we don't know what is happening behind the scenes. I understand that public support of Shelby from other CCs is very important, but private support can be very helpful for them. This isn't about the fandom.

There's a difference between supporting Shelby and deplatforming Wilbur. They're connected, obviously, but given that Shelby is another CC, there's more ways to support her compared to previous cases of mistreatment allegations against a CC where it's someone without a platform coming forward.

Stop supporting whoever you want, and do whatever makes you comfortable. But stop attacking people and demanding they stop watching CCs because "all men are horrible monsters" and "all CCs will disappoint you" and "you support abuse if you watch any CC who could possibly support an abuser or abuse". Which ignores the fact that anyone could be an abuser, and abuse isn't a CC issue, this isn't an MCYT issue, it's a society issue. Yes, some groups, especially white men in positions of power, are in positions where they can abuse people easier. But literally anyone could be an abuser. That's part of what Shelby talked about.

I doubt that it's healthy to assume everyone wants to hurt you, to harm others, to abuse and manipulate, and that you can never watch or enjoy someone because they might be bad or support harmful people. Obviously, it's understandable to think that obsessing over a CC is bad because it is. You shouldn't put people on a pedestal and say "they could never do that!". But I'm seeing blogs who have been devoted to a CC and/or their character(s) for 3+ years talking about why you can never find comfort in a CC, and should distrust all of them completely. Like dude. It's fine to like a CC who may not be related to this at all.

We know according to Lexie that some CCs knew about abuse she faced and didn't do anything, in fact they kept hanging out with these people. It's fine to be wary, to stop supporting people who it could be. Because I'm sure there are people behind the scenes who knew something.

But again, the random tumblr blogger who wants to grant a CC a chance to get their thoughts together instead of making a shitty statement is not your enemy! Guilt tripping and harassing people into never thinking about any CC who could be related is not an effective way to support Shelby, and it does not make this seem like something that is about abuse. It makes this seem like online discourse.

This is not drama. Stop treating it like drama where you need to throw around buzzwords. You cannot "win" supporting someone. The only "right" opinion is supporting victims of abuse. People can feel different ways about CCs who did or did not respond. Stop saying people are horrible because they didn't loudly, actively denounce a CC who hasn't responded in one day to possibly finding out for the first time that one of their closest friends is an abuser. That's not supporting Shelby.

[milgram-tournament]

MILGRAM Best Song Tournament, Round 1, Match 8 TRIAGE vs. I LOVE YOU

Propaganda for both options under the cut!

Propaganda for TRIAGE:

1. THE VOCALS!!!! TRIAGE REALLY GAVE A CHANCE TO LET SHIDOU'S VA SHINE BECAUSE HOLY SHIT!!! THAT FINAL CHORUS??? SO GOOD!!

2. SPEAKING OF THE FINAL CHORUS, THAT SLOWED DOWN PART???? STUNNING

3. THE LYRICS OH MY GOD I'M CRYING!!! "If the voices crying out in pain, can be saved by me Allow it to be my charge and mission"??? "I want to be INNOCENT, I want to live"??? PURE GOLD!!

3.25. OH AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE "extract that fang" LINE. IT'S SO GOOD!!!!

3.5. THE WAY THE LYRICS PERFECTLY REPRESENT HIS INTERNAL CONFLICT AND HIS ARC??? SO GOOD!!!

4. THE MV??? CATCH ME CRYING

To conclude: Triage is in my top 3 Milgram songs, I love it so much!! It turned Shidou from a character I didn't care about to one of my favorites!!!!!

---

-The scene with Shidou and his family… yeah don’t talk to me I’m so emo about it.

-The arc Shidou goes through during the song?? It starts with “why did you vote me innocent I don’t deserve it” to “I’m going to do my best with what you’ve given me.” Is really cool and I don’t think it’s talked about enough!!

-The final “I want to live!” Enough said. Shidou’s voice in general just fits this song really well.

-It gives a really good motive for Shidou, and helps you feel sorry for him. (Easiest inno vote of my life!)

Propaganda for I LOVE YOU:

mappi’s spitting bars 🔥🔥🔥🗣️🗣️🗣️

ok but i, as the iloveyoucountdown person before it released, waited 89 days for ily and SHE DID NOT DISAPPOINT‼️‼️‼️🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥 go vote ily now bc its peak music

---

the acoustic section where it just feels so raw and emotional it's crazy also we love to see mappi/miho okasaki rapping again and good lord mahiru delivered hadauwd, like you think about it a lot? like "Ishokujuu plus ai Miss you Raishuu aemasuka no Cadence Yurusarenai ikigai mou iki mo dekinai" it's also so catchy just "Dai- dai- dai- datte suki suki! Dai- dai- dai- datte daisuki."

it's such a quick song but it delivers and it DELIVERS WELL there's so much in the instrumental you can also miss, like sirens and such! again guitar section it's crazy!! i didn't even touch on the visuals, like the visuals are absolutely amazing and really touch on the toxic cycle of mahiru's relationship for example, the carousel turning into a forest! and also they were still able to implement some of tihtbilwy in the beginning of the song! we got to see mahiru's boyfriend as well!! additionally, RATS AND CAKE. HOLY SHIT we all know the absolute shock that appeared on everyone's faces the second that cake turned into a rat (to be honest, I was absolutely sick with shock for the rest of the day) It's really amazing as a song and MV, plus it did help give some more information on Mahiru!

---

miho okasaki's vocals are so powerful. it sounds like mahiru is screaming because of not being forgiven and because of what happened to her boyfriend and because "she can't just do it right".

THE LYRICS ARE SO. "clothes food shelter + love and miss you"?? "my lethal weapon is how to be in love with you"?? "kiss goodbye to this feeling cuz it's too heavy"?? again, the "why can't i just do it right" line?? SO GOOD.

MAHIRU RAPPING. THIS SONG STARTS WITH HER RAPPING. LITERAL CHILLS

i've heard the i love you chorus once and now it's in my head forever. i wake up, i sing the i love you chorus. i go to sleep, i sing the i love you chorus.

the lyrics are so sad when you start thinking about them more. "saying i love you but doing what i did, i know i have no right, crossed and covered in sin"?? please, don't you want to give mappi a hug. please she deserves it. she needs it

the "DIE-suki" pun.

the mv is so. i can talk about it for hours. it literally starts with showing us what happened to her bf. i've watched it live, i knew about this part and i still was shocked. mahiru's boyfriend is dead. mahiru is also rapping. also, the lyrics. this scene is terrifying to me and i mean it in the best way possible.

the cake symbolism. mahiru refusing to accept her reality and the true nature of her relationship with her bf and still seeing everything around her as cute and soft and pink. her feeling guilty and not knowing how to express love properly and still choosing to continue to love in this way. i don't know, something about it is so.. it's so sad and so realistic and so heartbreaking

i love how we can say so much about her relationship with her boyfriend based on mv and the lyrics. this is more of a theory and i probably shouldn't talk about it but i like the fact that mappi and her bf's relationship wasn't just abusive or one-sided love or anything like that. it's like they loved each other, they just.. didn't know how to show it or express it in a healthy way (or maybe mahiru's bf did know, but he was okay with going through all of this for her). like this scene when they're both riding the carousel and looking happy at first and even when both of them look like a mess, mahiru's face expression is still pretty much the same while her boyfriend looks much more tired, but he's still smiling. something about that part breaks me.

the instrumental is so fun and chaotic and creepy please listen to it. all milgram instrumentals are great but ily instrumental is definitely one of my fav ones.

[andrea-lyn]

I know so many people have shared their own sentiment about the watcher situation and I'm basically jumping into an overfilled pool, but I literally can't stop thinking about this one from the business side of things, so pls have some ramblings. behind a cut bc boy did this get long

All of this is just armchair observations as someone who's been in marketing, optimization, and had my fair share of budget-strapped projects over the years, and who is currently working on strategies to drive growth via marketing:

If it's purely about money - before any of this, they should have exhausted their existing options. Maybe hire a dedicated marketing person to develop a growth and content strategy around Patreon to drive value. Beyond that, use that marketing person to drive awareness campaigns to get people to Patreon with a goal to 5x your Patron count, because there was definitely untapped potential there

If it's about content - every artist has their right to make what they want, but when you start asking people to pay for it, now you have to do your research. Do a survey with a substantive response rate to understand if people even want the shows that you want to produce. Again, you have a right as an artist to produce what you want, but asking your fanbase to pay for things that they don't want is a lot. This is when you need sponsorship help (or seed money and tbh, I'm not ruling out that they don't have some of that behind the scenes). I saw a comment that summed it up really well that when Buzzfeed was paying for Worth It, there was a small thrill of seeing them spend a company's money, but now it's the subscribers money. At that point, if you actually want to be marketable and successful, you need a pulse on what people are willing to pay for vs want for free. If you're spending all your money on high production values for shows that maybe 10% of your audience want, it's wasted resources

I won't speak to the staffing levels because there's likely a lot of nuance there, but I will say that there are probably workflow and resource improvements that could've been done to at least make the staff levels more efficient. This comes down to someone in a process role, which might have been done! Obviously I don't have a peek under the hood and I know they've discussed restructuring before, but this is a matter of scale and goes back to the second point -- there's a lot of 'if we build it, they will come' mentality here, but again, if you're not building what they want ... no, they won't, especially when Dropout and Netflix and Disney+ and other subscribers are building right beside you.

If they were dead-set on this, then should have hired a marketing/PR person to plan this launch for them. Dropout, anecdotally, is an example I go back to. I still remember seeing the stings at the end of videos about it and I remember going 'hey, I'm not going to pay for that' for years. But they were deliberate in their strategy of posting content, they didn't immediately shove behind the paywall, and they built up a catalogue with content that it did then make sense to pay (and a reasonable rate for the value!). The abrupt launch without a content plan to communicate value was an odd choice. I also think that survey I mentioned before should have delved into willingness to pay so they could actually understand where the ceiling kicks in and where no matter how much people want to pay that might not match up with what they're willing to. You'd get your average price there and then you could realistically do a workback schedule to understand the content you can produce, which could have then be used to create a content pipeline

Honestly, I think it all comes down to them wanting to pursue their dreams and more power to them. I love that they have a mission statement to make television quality videos -- but here's the thing, you have an existing audience and given the reaction, it's becoming clear that your mission statement and your audience's core wants of your product don't align, which means that something has to get sacrificed ...and unfortunately, in this case, I think it's the goodwill of a large portion of the audience that gets the knife because I really don't think this one's getting walked back

Like I said earlier, I do have some suspicions that maybe there's seed money or financial backing in this from investors (they solicited this in the past), but they've lacked a clear strategy around growth and marketing to buffer their finances in the past and it doesn't fill me with a lot of optimism that things will change because they're behind a paywall. For those who intend to subscribe, I think it's great and I think that it proves that yes, there is going to be an audience for them -- it's just always a question of numbers and whether that audience is their target to break even. I had suspicions their big announcement was this and I was honestly planning to subscribe too until I saw the price point and the lack of future scheduling news. Unfortunately, given the amount of subscriptions I already have, it didn't make sense, but if it were cheaper and there was a more robust content plan, I probably would be there too.

[amethystina]

The Devil Judge Meta: Introducing Kang Yo Han and Kim Ga On

Hello. I'm sick with a fever and you all know what that means — another needlessly long and detailed meta about The Devil Judge. Because sometimes I like to be predictable.

Last time we looked at The Bus Scene and this time we'll be focusing on Kang Yo Han and Kim Ga On's character introductions and what we find out about these two characters during them. And, to some degree, how they mirror and differ from each other. Spoilers: it's glorious.

Disclaimer: This is by no means a complete meta. I know next to nothing about filmmaking and all that goes into it, so this focuses mostly on the characters and what an amateur like me can observe during the respective scenes. But I might miss or skip over certain details, especially things related to cinematography and such. I'm a librarian, not a director, and I just want to yell about characters I love and how absolutely SPECTACULAR this drama is at presentation and storytelling. So sue me.

Second Disclaimer: I was, once again, left unsupervised with Photoshop while having a fever. So I, once again, take no responsibility for the resulting screenshots.

Third Disclaimer: This meta will not be entirely chronological but instead focus on one aspect of their introduction at a time, so there will be some jumps back and forth. But, hopefully, it will still be easy to follow.

And so, without further ado, you will find more under the cut!

Now. The first thing the drama wants to establish is that Kang Yo Han and Kim Ga On are very different characters in terms of personality, experience, status etc. And how do they do this, you ask? By putting them in similar situations during their introductions but having several key differences that highlight their respective characterisation. This allows the viewer to more easily compare them and draw the desired conclusion — it might even happen subconsciously for some. Because, yes, their introductions are mirrored in so, so many ways and it's very effective once you put them side by side and actually study them more closely.

The devil's in the details, so to speak — pun ENTIRELY intended.

So! The first time we see them, they're on a mode of transportation, currently travelling through a tunnel. In Yo Han's case, it's a tunnel for cars:

In Ga On's case, we don't get a clear shot of the tunnel itself until later, but one can quickly deduce that he's in one given the details during the first second he's on screen:

Most people recognise this as a subway train and that the lighting must mean that they're either underground or inside a tunnel.

Now, here's where the fun begins since while they're both in dark tunnels, there are already some noticeable and important differences. Yo Han is in an expensive car — a vehicle he drives himself — and not only is he alone inside it, but practically alone on the road as well, with only the distant headlights of an oncoming car in sight. There are no cars (that we can see during this first shot) heading in the same direction as Yo Han.

Ga On, on the other hand? He is, as mentioned, on a subway car, driven by someone else, surrounded by other commuters. People who, in other words, might not be heading to the exact same destination as him, but at least in the same direction. They're all on the same train together.

So, even here, within literal seconds, while they're still both in this dark tunnel — unrevealed to the world, if you will — we are told several important things about these two characters:

Their current level of power over their own destiny (driving themselves vs. a mere passenger)

Their existence in society (solitary vs. one of the people)

Their social economic status (fancy car vs. subway train)

And, finally, the direction their moving (against the tide vs. the same as everyone else)

Beautiful, isn't it?

And this stark contrast continues once they emerge from their respective tunnels as well, with Yo Han driving out into the night:

And Ga On arriving to a burst of morning sunlight:

The consistent theme of Yo Han as darkness and Ga On as light will never not make me go feral, okay? I LIVE for that shit. And I'm still struggling against the impulse to write a meta about it because it would be insanely long and probably devolve into incoherent babbling at some point.

BUT I DIGRESS.

Once leaving the tunnel, they both find themselves on a bridge, crossing a wide expanse of… well, pitch-black darkness in Yo Han's case and water in Ga On's. Crossing a bridge is often meant to symbolise a transition or the start of something new. So, clearly, both Yo Han and Ga On are embarking on a new journey and we, the viewers, are invited to follow along during it. They begin these journeys roughly at the same time and, not so surprisingly, we soon find out that their paths are destined to cross. So while their journeys may have started separately, they'll eventually end up entwining and continuing forward together.

(… because we needed to make this drama sound even more like a star-crossed lovers romance, I guess?)

But where are they going then, you ask?

Well, that's another beauty of this introduction since you, as the viewer, aren't quite sure where Yo Han is heading, are you? Everything is just darkness. He could be going anywhere. We can assume he's heading to the fancy party we see in between the shots of Yo Han, sure, but we can't be certain. He's still very mysterious because, at this point, he's inside a car and we haven't seen how he's dressed or even his full face. His purpose is unknown — as is his final destination.

And that, as we all know, will actually remain more or less hidden from us until the very last episode. So I guess it's good that they establish his unpredictability from the very start? xD

Anyhow. They keep us in suspense for quite some time where Yo Han is concerned, having us watch him drive across Seoul. But one consistent thing is that he remains mostly alone on the road, even if we sometimes see other cars in the background. And, quite often, he's seen driving across or against the other cars, paving his own way, if you will.

(This is, of course, also because it's easier for the viewer to follow a single car as opposed to one in crowded traffic. So there are definitely productional reasons as well, but I do love the extra spice it adds to the reading of Yo Han's character)

We have no idea where Yo Han is headed and he could make a turn at any time, changing the direction of the car if he so chooses.

This is quite different from Ga On since all the context clues surrounding him — his clothes, the practical backpack, the number of other commuters on the train, the dusky morning sunlight — quickly leads to the assumption that he's heading to work. We might not know where he works yet, but there are still a lot fewer questions and uncertainties about his destination. Ga On's journey is, at least at first glance, predictable and mundane, especially compared to Yo Han's.

Ga On is on a train he's not driving, moving on a track with only one way to go. It's so predictable it's almost boring, the outcome set before it even began. If Ga On wants to change his path, his only option is to get off the train — that's how little control and influence he has. He's not without control — there is a choice involved, in getting on the subway in the first place — but it's a far cry from Yo Han who's in complete control, driving himself to wherever he's heading.

(And yes, do take a moment to ponder the beautiful new layer this adds to Yo Han telling Ga On to drive them to the fundraising gala. Made even more intriguing by that stunt Yo Han pulled by suddenly yanking on the wheel, testing Ga On's control over the car. And the significance of Ga On getting inside the car with Yo Han when he's telling Professor Min that he's eloping with his sugar daddy switching sides. Go on. Ponder it. I'll wait.)

Now, moving on to their faces.

Here we have two very different approaches. With Yo Han, we see glimpses of his face throughout his car ride, like this right here:

We can only barely make out his features with the majority of his face being in shadow. And this theme continues, showing us one piece here, another there, but never his fully lit face. Some parts are always hidden, outside of view, or in shadow. We get fractures of the man rather than the complete picture.

And then, of course, they hit us with this one:

Which (if you can tear your gaze away from, well, The Gaze) you'll find is about four cityscapes, twisted, mirrored, or layered on top of/next to each other. Which is, of course, very cool and pretty, but also an indication of Yo Han's character and the topsy-turvy ride we're about to go on with this man. Especially when you add the fact that we haven't even seen his entire face ONCE so far.

Translation: This bitch be complicated, fam.

Basically, Yo Han has layers upon layers and even if we're shown several parts of the whole and can assume we know what we'll find at the end, it might be a mistake to think we know him.

(I also like this shot because I can't help but wonder if this is what the inside of Yo Han's mind looks like. I mean, how he might look at a situation from different angles, layered on top of each other, flipped and tipped to its side or even upside down. Idk. It's an interesting thought.)

This build-up of not showing Yo Han's face continues for a long time, not just during the car ride but also after he arrives at the venue, where he's seen walking the halls. Again, just like while he was driving, he's often walking alone, past other people — even on the other side of a pane of glass at one point — to once again highlight his solitary and contrary path in life.

All of this makes it almost anti-climactic that the first time we see Yo Han's at least adequately lit face — when it's not being split up by shadows or camera angles — is this:

It's not even a particularly clear shot and he's surrounded by other people to the point where he's still sort of obscured. It's almost a little disorienting after all that build-up, especially since we see him relaxed and smiling, comfortably walking through a crowd of shouting people. It's in no way as flashy as that build-up made us believe. Why all that secrecy if this is how he's finally introduced? Wasn't it supposed to be special?

(Or maybe he's still hiding? Maybe this isn't his real face, either? The plot thickens!)

Ga On, in contrast, has an incredibly short build-up. We see him open the train door, walk a couple of steps, grab a handrail, and BAM.

No cheeky glimpses, fancy shots, or prolonged tension. Just: "Here he is — your boy."

(Thank you — we will treasure him)

Which, when put next to Yo Han's long and layered reveal, is pretty telling. Here's someone straightforward, to-the-point, and, most likely, honest. He doesn't need a long, complex introduction because what you see is what you get. There's something almost comforting in that clarity and it helps make Ga On feel more approachable and relatable, especially in comparison to Yo Han.

(May I also point out the hilarity of this being the first time we see Ga On's face and he's already looking at Yo Han? Better start early, I guess?)

And, obviously, instead of the darkness, artificial lights, and camera flashes of Yo Han's intro, Ga On gets this:

He is soft and warm like mash potato.

That's not to say that Ga On is without depth or layers, however. If we continue on the concept that light is very important in this drama (which we know it is) there are a couple of seconds here during Ga On's intro that are VERY intriguing. Because he, much like Yo Han, does get a moment of foreshadowing as well — of conflicts and reveals to come.

I present: The Three Stages of Kim Ga On

Shown in the order they appear in the drama, mere seconds apart. And, depending on how you choose to view the ending of the drama, could perhaps be said to show the progression of his character.

Anyway. Feel free to interpret this as a cheeky little wink, hinting at Ga On's hidden darkness. If you're into that kind of thing — which I clearly am. Because they didn't have to make the entire subway car go almost completely dark there for a second, but they did. And I, for one, am delighted.

(Yes, I'm having the time of my life, thank you for asking)

Now, perhaps you're tempted to argue that there wasn't much of that infamous mirroring here, with their situations being similar but with important differences in the key details. But that's only because I've been holding out on these two screenshots, showing both Yo Han and Ga On the seconds before their faces are revealed:

Just look at that. Look at the similarities and marvellous, wonderful differences that help establish who these two characters are — and how they contrast each other.

Yo Han arrives in a fancy suit to a red carpet event, people cheering, cameras flashing, and priceless art just on the edge of the shot. It's colourful, it's expensive, and it's important. There are even ropes separating him from the onlookers, signifying that his arrival is expected — he's the main event. The whole shot reeks of money, power, and prestige.

Meanwhile, Ga On is wearing a thick coat and backpack on a drab, dimly lit subway train, with graffiti on the walls, sleepy commuters lounging in their seats, and no one paying attention to him. Ga On is right there, amongst the rest of the people, and it's in no way important. He is in no way significant. He's just a normal guy — one more commuter on the train, heading to work.

Just these two shots alone tell you so much about these characters and what to expect from them. It is, quite frankly, masterful character establishment, especially when you put them one after the other like this.

Because, dear LORD, from a framing perspective? Both having objects on each side, framing them in, and people occupying roughly the same space? (though they're lower on Ga On's and higher on Yo Han's which, of course *chef's kiss*) And how the lines of the red carpet line up with the lights from Ga On's subway, turning them almost into literal mirrors of each other? Except instead of showing a reflection, it shows the rich vs. the poor — the high society vs. the low.

K, take the wheel, I'm going to need a moment.

(*pterodactyl screech*)

MOVING ON.

Even if Ga On's coat looks nice and all, they still make sure to establish that, yes, he's from a poor background. Partly through his mode of transportation but also this shot (which is one of my favourites):

Very often, the use of stairs, escalators, and elevators symbolise a character's status and their climb upwards or fall from grace. In Ga On's case, we see him riding the escalator on this journey he's embarked on, essentially showing us how he's moving up in the world — that he's heading somewhere new, to a place he's not originally from. To a level of influence and power he's not had before. This new job is Important. Which is only further strengthened later during the day, when he has to descend a cracked, dimly lit staircase in a bad neighbourhood on his way home, taking him back to the level where he originally came from.

Yo Han, meanwhile, stays the same almost the entire time, both while driving and walking through the venue. His journey is unchanged in terms of status, fame, and riches. The only exception is a brief moment of him walking up a staircase but it's short enough to have less of an impact than Ga On's ascent.

There's also the added layer of Ga On not walking up these steps and instead being taken there on an escalator — once again showing us that he's not really picking his destination on his own. He's just following along.

And, finally, of course: the lighting. The gorgeous lighting.

Ga On, as always, symbolises light though here I'd argue it has the additional meaning of rich vs. poor and, considering the advertisement slapped on the wall, influence vs. powerlessness. He's emerging from the dark into the light, the edge almost sharp enough to touch.

Just like stairs and elevators can symbolise status, to draw a line — literal or otherwise — and have a character interact with it says a lot about their personality, actions, and coming journey. An abundance of storytelling can be hidden in these lines, to show differences in status, influence, and opinions. It's also a very good way to build tension and create conflict.

And, in Ga On's case, he's crossing it. This is a step on his journey — one of the bridges he's crossing on the way to the new beginning he's facing. With this, Ga On is heading out into a world on a completely different level than he initially grew up in.

And he looks so hopeful, too! Gazing upward, into the light.

(This screenshot wasn't entirely necessary to prove my point, I just think he's cute)

And this brings us to the last area I want to focus on, which is their position/standing with the people and within society. Since this, too, is made very clear to the viewer during their introductions. Partly through the social-economic differences we've already touched on, but also how they interact with other people.

We see both of these men pass by the signs of unrest in their country and, quite quickly, their respective standings are established. Yo Han, for example, is seen driving through the chaotic, burning streets of Seoul:

But, clearly, he's not really touched by it. First of all, he's got the protection of the car to shield him from the literal blaze and, second, the car itself shows just how far removed he is from this. The contrast between the fancy car and the burning streets is wonderful (or, well, horrible, actually, but you know what I mean). Also, since he's inside the car, we don't get to see his reaction to any of this. Is he horrified? Outraged? Sad? Neutral? We have no idea.

There's even this shot to further hammer home just how distant Yo Han is from the struggle of the everyday people:

Not only are they separated by a wall which, as you can see, creates another line. But, unlike Ga On, neither Yo Han nor the people are crossing it. They're staying on their separate sides for now, within sight of each other but not touching or challenging the status quo.

And, once again, Yo Han's car shows the opulent world he comes from, while the people protesting are walking. You can also see that Yo Han is heading in the completely opposite direction from everyone else. And, of course, you have the added bonus of the people walking into the light — symbolising hope and righteousness — and Yo Han is driving, well, we can't quite see where, but it looks like it's going to be dark.

Absolute goddamn poetry.

And what about Ga On, you ask? Unsurprisingly, his reaction — and relationship — to the protesting people is completely different.

Not only is he walking — just like they were — but he's right there, next to them. He's one of them. He even acknowledges the protest by looking at the man's sign. And, unlike Yo Han, we get to see his reaction which, while subtle, shows quite a lot of discomfort. He keeps walking without pausing, sure, but it's clear that he's uncomfortable. He almost looks ashamed, even, since he tilts his head down as he walks past the protesting people.

That hopeful, bright-eyed optimism is suddenly nowhere to be seen and, very quickly, establishes one of Ga On's main conflicts, i.e. his desire to help the people but lack of power to do so since he is one of the people. He's not rich and famous like Yo Han.

Which is only further proved when Ga On passes yet another line — this one even guarded by men with guns, showing just how few are allowed the privilege:

This line is even clearer than the one when he emerged from the subway and the way he crosses it, without hesitation, says a lot about his bravery and boldness. But we can also see that it takes him past the protests, away from the people, and into the safe, guarded world of the rich and powerful. It doesn't mean he has to stay there, but its shows, once again, that he's going somewhere new, crossing boundaries and expectations.

And, just to emphasise this a little bit more, in case we didn't catch on yet, this happens:

He immediately gets stopped and asked to prove why he should be allowed in this space. Implying that he doesn't belong. But we quickly find out that, despite his origins, this is actually where he's supposed to be — he's just new. He's reached the destination of his journey (for now).

It's also important to note that we don't get to follow Yo Han on his route to work even if they both crossed that bridge at the start. Because while they're both embarking on something new, Yo Han's journey was taking him to the venue where he's named the new chief judge of the Live Court Show, but going in to work at the Supreme Court? Clearly nothing new to Yo Han. He's already there when Ga On arrives, even, showing that Yo Han, unlike Ga On, is comfortably where he belongs. Yo Han has existed in this world for quite some time already.

Ga On's arrival at the Supreme Court also shows just how much of a nobody he is. His face isn't recognised, so he's clearly not famous. Meanwhile, Yo Han showed up at his destination to applause and a red carpet and, before long, got this framing:

He is, quite literally, above the regular people, signifying not only how rich he is, but his status and importance. So while both Yo Han and all the organisers of the Live Court Show keep insisting that it's for the people, this shot here tells you everything you need to know. Because Yo Han is still untouchable to these people, in his fancy suit, broadcast on a huge TV screen. He's not one of them, even if he claims to represent them. His peers — i.e. the only people in the same room as him, who aren't seeing him through a TV broadcast — are other rich people or reporters. Telling, much?

I also love the added detail of how bright the screen is, like a beacon of hope in the dark, but it's artificial light, created by man, so how true is it? This is very different from Ga On who is often bathed in natural sunlight, making his light and the hope he offers seem much more sincere.

Anyhow! Let's also take a (quick) detour to discuss colours because they, too, play a role. While both of them start in more or less the same colour scheme (dark, muted blues, greens, greys, and black) they quickly head in different directions once they emerge from their respective tunnels.

Yo Han gets bright sparks of colours — some of them even fluorescent — though, most notably, glowing oranges and angry reds. There is a lot of colour in Yo Han's introduction, making it very rich, warm, and luxurious, especially once he arrives at the venue. But it's all so bright it almost feels fake. And, perhaps more importantly, you have all the fires and chaos. While both introductions show protests and unrest, Yo Han's portray a much more violent and angry side of it — a much more frightening one. And, perhaps, a bit of foreshadowing as to what kind of person Yo Han is.

Ga On, on the other hand, stays in that more neutral colour space aside from some bright glimpses of warm, natural sunlight. It's calm and unassuming, if also a bit grey and mundane, showing his low status. But it's also less artificial, which makes him feel more like an honest, ordinary person. The red pops up here, too, though, on the protest signs, connecting back to the chaos and anger we saw in Yo Han's colouring. So while we can see that they both exist in the same world that blends together at times, they are kept separate through their colouring during their introduction.

In conclusion: It's often said that how you introduce a character is vital since whatever a viewer sees first will, most likely, colour their understanding of the character for the duration of the story. It can of course evolve as more information is gathered but, in the long run, that first introduction is incredibly important.

And it's clear from what we've seen here that a lot of thought has been put into these introductions. Not only are they meant to tell us who these characters are with all the context clues and details, but also how they mirror each other. And, by extension, their relationship to each other. One on its own would still say much about that character, but it's only when you view them together that you can get the full depth and meaning behind them. Only when you contrast Yo Han's mysterious and flashy intro to Ga On's muted, more natural entrance can you fully grasp the scope of these characters — and how they're meant to be played against and complement each other.

Made even clearer by how both of their introductions involve an initial journey — a new beginning — but it's only once both of them have completed it (Ga On's taking place the morning after Yo Han's) that their introductions are finished and the rest of the story begins. There's a certain kind of beauty in how these scenes show two different journeys — when they took place, how they took place, who embarked on them — but they still reached the same destination in the end. Yo Han and Ga On's journeys both take them to the Supreme Court and, more specifically, the Live Court Show. That is where their paths are destined to cross.

And that, right there, is the core of their story and this entire goddamn drama. And also the one thing I want you all to take with you as you leave this meta.

The introduction of Kang Yo Han and Kim Ga On is ultimately done with one overarching goal in mind.

To bring them together and allow for their shared journey to begin.

*Mic drop*

[russenoire]

here, i'm gonna spill some more ink over studio bones' decisions adapting ???% in mob psycho 100's confession arc... in a lighter color, perhaps.

some manga readers are upset at the lack of separation between '???%' and 'mob' in the anime vs the clear separation in the manga. that separation doesn't exist in the original japanese.

mob's 声優 (seiyuu) setsuo itō's voice acting in this scene from MP100's first season is by turns startling and visceral (tbh, most of the VA work in this scene is amazing, but i'm only referring to mob here).

given the above, i expected a voice come up from the depths of hell for ???% in the confession arc, but bones and itō-san did not indulge my whims here. what they gave us instead...

...actually reflects the source material.

while there is an audible distinction between ???%'s nonchalant contempt and mob's considerably-more-animated (thanks to all that emotional growth we've seen over the course of the story!) upset, they sound like the same person in the anime... because they are. i thought this a tidy way to convey that fact, and this subtle distinction is not that different in feel from what we see on the page in the original language.

inside the teenager's mind, shigeo (???%) and mob quarrel in the same font. tails on their speech bubbles eventually disappear as they continue to argue with each other. i found this pointed lack of separation a little confusing on first read, but eventually became used to it.

(for a breakdown of this full conversation in the manga, check out @exilepurify's awesome translation post.)

shigeo chafes at the thought of considering others' needs. he scorns mob for bending himself into a shape he thinks will suit tsubomi, mocks mob's desire to blend into the background and somehow escape notice. his own wish for tsubomi to accept him in all his explosive vainglory doesn't take her wishes into account, either.

and yet. his desires are subordinate to mob's.

he wants what mob wants -- only without that whole pesky 'consideration for other people' thing -- and he wants to keep mob alive. their full conversation reveals just how much shigeo actually loves mob.

for all practical purposes, any distinctions between shigeo and mob -- private vs public, subconscious vs conscious -- only exist in the boy's head. even then, they have been unfairly imposed... by mob himself.

the teenager laying waste to seasoning city? the teenager his friends and family love? one and the same.

his loved ones and allies address him with the names by which they know him; they assume he's the same person, just experiencing an involuntary loss of control and in need of some help. it's important to emphasize that. drastically different voices for shigeo and mob would have drawn a hard line between them where there is none.

studio bones removed and/or internalized ???%'s lines, apparently robbing him of speech. but ???% is talking to himself, and no one else can hear him.

in the manga, shigeo seizes control of the boy's speech centers and speaks out loud as ???%, in a scratchy, rough font meant to evoke a harsh voice. (it's the same font used for ???%'s last brief, conscious takeover when mob discovers the crispy fried corpses of his family in their merrily crackling home! you can hear itō-san's delightful interpretation of it in episode 9 from the second season.)

he says:

｢僕の好きにやらせてもらう。」 boku no s'ki ni yarasete morau. 'i'll be free to do whatever i want.' or more literally: 'i will take [from you] the allowance to do as i please.' his use of 貰う here emphasizes that he is forcing mob's hand.

this line and the shift in viewpoint serve to highlight the exact moment where shigeo gains the advantage in his argument with mob.

mob and shigeo squabble for external control for a while; ONE shows this by letting them both speak aloud in this same rough voice. both sides of the fight between the two (at least after 'i'll be free to do whatever i want') can actually be heard from the outside. we only get a few small panels of this as it's happening, but it's unnerving.

shigeo, who is winning this battle, not only gets far more lines as seen from without, but his harsh rasp even colors mob's external speech. this is mob's only line the mangaka lets us see in that font, and it's heartbreaking:

｢だって… もしこれが本当の僕の姿だっていうなら…」 datte... mosh' kore ga hontou no boku no sugata datte iu nara... 'because... if this [???%] is what i really am, as you say...

the line continues within:

｢本当の僕になんて誰も近寄らない。誰も…　誰も助けてくれない。そんなの嫌いだ。」 hontou no boku ni nante daremo ch'kayoranai. daremo... daremo tas'kete kurenai. sonna no kirai da. 'no one will come anywhere near the real me. no one... no one will be there for me. i won't have that.'

the full takeover, which happens a bit later, is marked by:

shigeo's dissolution of and absorption of mob's consciousness into himself;

reigen's ｢すまない｣ (sumanai, 'i'm sorry') for not knowing the nature of what his deshi was struggling to contain;

???%'s last glance back at the man before pressing on towards his goal... as reigen begs him to wait, running after him.

thereafter, we see ???% from without. we get two short glimpses of shigeo's internal perspective before dimple's reappearance, then rejoin him inside for his last explosion with mob.

the anime depicts the moment of full takeover thusly:

shigeo's dissolution of and absorption of mob's consciousness into himself;

a ｢すまない｣ from reigen, who senses something has gone even more wrong with the boy and renews his pursuit... begging him to wait;

shigeo's turning his back on reigen and walking on. we see him spurning his mentor from the inside, his face hardening against a stark black backdrop.

the outward shift happens on-screen too. while it eventually returns to an internal view just as the manga does, it largely stays there, owing to a serious expansion of the scene where shigeo indulges his thirst for revenge on reigen.

except for an audible sigh when teru remarks on how normal his friend's losing control of himself actually makes him, anime shigeo speaks to no one.

???% is alone when he speaks in the manga; reigen is nowhere within earshot and shigeo is only addressing mob. in other words, he's talking to himself. shigeo never utters a word to anyone else in either manga or anime, as if he owes no one an explanation for the choice to sack his hometown or injure his friends.

as bone-chilling and unsettling as ???% speaking out loud is on the page, as much as it enhances the reading experience... in my opinion, it adds nothing new to our understanding of this situation on the screen. viewers can see for themselves that:

an internal takeover has occurred in this boy's mind,

???% is sentient and human and ever so divinely enraged at having been chained up for so long;

???% is finally free.

so why should studio bones belabor this point by having him shout, in the middle of a tornado, to no one in particular? if a boy speaks in a tornado, and there is no one around to hear it, does he make a sound... ?

i also don't know that this would translate well to film. in real life, talking to oneself like that usually carries connotations of psychosis, and resolving it as is done here would honestly be an insult to real-life sufferers. i love it to pieces in the manga but understand why this was cut.

the only things removing ???%'s outward speech loses for me are:

one last opportunity for itō-san to flex that audible jump-scare STOMACH-TWISTING SNARL (oh, i will miss it so);

a slightly-less-vague sense of how shigeo might make his wishes known to tsubomi, were he to present himself to her like this... he wants her approval so badly, and is terrified of not getting it. would he be able to speak to her at all? in the manga the question becomes what would he even say to her?

[ashesandhackles]

Prisoner of Azkaban reread notes (Part 1)

Chapter 1, 2,3, 4

Wendelin the Weird really mocks the idea of wizards facing persecution from Muggles, and the anecdote shows how they have more power.

@starlingflight had an hc that the Weasley family went to meet Bill because of the events of last year and because Ginny really looks up to him. In PS, they went to visit Charlie in Romania during holidays, and in CoS, they went to meet Bill. This is the second time they are going to Bill in a very short time. Peak eldest sibling/ third parent moment.

I love the detail in Ron's letter about Molly not letting Ginny into the last tomb, which had all sorts of mutant skeletons. This takes on a layer given what happened to Ginny in Chamber of Secrets.

Uncle Vernon complains about Sirius' hair and then shoots a look at Harry's own. I love the connection the narrative makes between Harry and Sirius from the very beginning - the hair, when Uncle Vernon looks to Harry after he makes a comment about people "deserving punishment"

Ah Marge. The way she treats Harry is special kind of vile. There is a special kind of nastiness to her giving Harry dog biscuits as a present, and then later on in the same chapter alluding to Harry as weak, runty pup that she had someone drown (and then implying Lily has bad blood - "if there is something wrong with the bitch, then there is something wrong with the pup"). Also, although Harry is written as "default white" - this is one of the times I felt such a strong undercurrent of racism here.

And Harry, after first two books of his management of Dursleys, finally rejects them and runs away. ("I had enough" - both Harry and Sirius say at some point with their families)

Interesting that in CoS, Harry is quick to believe Ron and Hermione have forgotten all about him when he didnt get their letters (major abandonment issues acting up, exacerbated by circumstances ofc), but by POA, he is confident that even if he is an outlaw in wizarding world, Ron and Hermione would want to help him. Ron and Hermione slowly help healing Harry <3

Right when Harry is considering his life as an outcast, he is being watched by Sirius, who appears right after Harry has rejected Dursleys as caregivers of any kind, and is the wizarding world outcast. (Also, Sirius has swum the north sea and escaped prison, and he wants to "catch a glimpse")

Sirius laughing at the scene of the crime is such a stark image. We see him do this at the end of the book, when Peter accuses him. ("Black started to laugh, a horrible, mirthless laugh that filled the whole room"). When Peter accuses him of breaking out of Azkaban using dark Powers, Black "started to laugh, a horrible mirthless laugh that filled the whole room." I love this absolutely contrarian impulse in him, that he is laughing at the sheer gall of Peter to accuse him after everything. It also feels like a habit from his home life - designed to piss people off when they accuse him of something, most likely unjust. And it is the same response that happens in his breakdown over James's death on the street - it is the mirthless laughter that begins because of audacity of Peter, and it goes into breakdown over James's death.

Harry returns every day to look at the Firebolt. Jock boy.

Sirius = the Grim. XD interesting how he is associated with a death omen. @artemisia-black has a meta about this.

Ron and Mr Weasley share the same stress response: ears turning red.

Mr and Mrs Weasley recreate the same dynamic as Molly as Sirius in OOTP. Molly does not want Harry to know, Arthur wants Harry to know to be on his guard. This is telling of Rowling's fixed ideas on intrinsic traits of a gender - the man wants to give Harry more agency to be in charge, while the woman is cautious (I'm not making this up, there is literally an interview with Melissa Anelli where she said this about Molly vs Sirius scene: that she wants to contrast "cautious feminine principle" with Sirius' "take charge" masculine principle")

This book feels so melancholy to me. There is a suspense aspect built up with Harry spotting the dog, seeing that it is a death omen, and Sirius saying "he is at hogwarts". On first read, these are scary things. But when you know what you know, this is just dripping with sadness.

Chapter 5,6,7

Ginny tries to join the trio and Ron tells her to "go away". @hinnyfied pointed out how Ginny followed both Ron here and when the train is dark. I really like glimpses of sibling relationships like this!

Remus is here - he is asleep. (interesting that they take note that only students use Hogwarts Express and it is unusual for an adult to be there).

Remus does wandless magic, and conjures flames in his palm. I really really love this detail. The "right to carry a wand" is heavily contested among "creatures" as Griphook resentfully mentions in DH - and it feels like something he has trained himself to be good at. @thecat-isblogging-blog also believes it is something for post transformation - when he may not have his wand and would be vulnerable.

"Ginny looked nearly as bad as Harry felt, and gave a small sob." and Hermione goes and puts an arm around her. Again the Chamber comes up. ("Didnt any of you fall of your seats?" "No, Ginny was shaking like mad though.")

Since this is a book where Harry starts to root his masculinity in James, the shame he feels for collapsing on train is a nice touch. ("I am not delicate!" Harry said crossly). Special thanks to @artemisia-black for her metas for this insight - I would not have looked at this with lens of masculinity if not for your metas!

Interesting detail that both Dean and Lavendar also have no idea what The Grim is. Rest of the class knows - so it is embedded in wizarding culture. This is also a hint to Lavendar's blood status i think? I never picked up on this before.

Dean Thomas appreciation, when Slytherins shout at Hagrid after the Buckbeak incident, Dean says, "It was malfoy's fault!"

"giving Harry a look of loathing reserved just for him" - something about this sentence really cracks me up. lmao.

Snape threatening Trevor really hits at Neville's worst insecurities. Trevor is a gift from his family after Neville proves that he is magical (and not a Squib, as they were fearing). So Trevor is a representation of that for Neville. So Neville's fear - is not being good enough, something Snape (and also his grandmother in a very different way, hits - as McGonagall says, "it's time for her to be proud of the grandson she does have, instead of the one she wishes she had" in HBP). Neville grows very subtly throughout the series.

I love how Lyall and Hope's meeting via Boggarts (as per pottermore) adds another layer to why Remus takes it on in his first class.

Remus is polite to Snape, but he slips in the same scene - when he is asking Neville about what his grandmother wears (so Neville can overlay it on Snape), he prompts, "and a handbag?" when Neville can't seem to remember. Remus is a very subtle character, and his slip ups about his feelings are also super subtle like this. There is no reason for him to prompt Neville on this - but there is a part of him is enjoying this. (It's that part of him on the map that goes: "keep your abnormally large nose out of other people's business")

Chapter 8,9, 10,11

I love how immediately attuned Remus is with Harry, and how Harry actually does say what is bothering him after initially saying no. It is the lack of judgement from Remus, and his ability to let silence be. (Sirius does this with Harry too later on, and so does Ginny)

I love that Harry thought Lups will deny what he had observed, but he not only validates it but offers Harry an honest explanation of why he didnt let Harry fight the Boggart. It is a respect for Harry's agency and intelligence that makes Harry immediately take to him. ("I am impressed, this suggests that what you fear most of all is - fear. Very wise, Harry")

Snape, "unsmiling and watchful" that Harry and Lups are spending time together, and he has told Dumbledore that he is untrustworthy and is helping Sirius.S nape's "eyes were flickering towards Lupin more often than usual" even after brewing the Potion - Snape is super hypervigilant with Lups - there is genuine fear here. Given his teenage brush off, I can see why.

Snape being Dumbledore's angry child: trying to hint to Dumbledore that Lups may be the inside help, and Dumbledore shutting him down, and Snape concedes to it because they are in front of Percy.

Percy looked slightly abashed when Dumbledore mentions that no Dementor would cross the threshold of the castle while he is Headmaster. I wonder what Percy's views are on use of Dementors? He is very assimilationist. The next book, he is on Crouch's side for Winky debacle, so it is likely he thinks Dementors should have a look in the castle.

"his robes were hanging more loosely around him" - interesting detail to show the aftermath of transformation on Lups. It is extremely taxing on his body.

Lups both cant help himself from being concerned that Harry is sad about the match and cant help feeling guilty, that Whomping Willow, made for his use, is what smashed Harry's broomstick.

Harry is so comfortable opening a topic with Lups that he finds deeply shameful: that he fell because of the Dementors, that he hears Lily's death when they get close. It is interesting that Jily death hangs so strongly over POA, and both Remus and later, Sirius act as a stand in for James in this book.

"Lupin made a sudden motion with his arm as though he made to grip Harry's shoulder, but thought better of it." - the summary of Remus and Harry's relationship in the entire series, and Harry breaks through this wall in Deathly Hallows.

"White and shaking he was" "Give Harry to me, I am his godfather" "Black argued, but in the end he gave in" - so demonstrative of the fact that his first priority is always Harry

Sirius was absolutely doing a performance of boredom for Fudge. It is his way of fighting, even in prison - his way of saying, "you havent broken me." Because we do see how Sirius really feels around Dementors at the end of the book - hands over his head, and moaning, "No Please"

"Quite the double act" - McGonagall not mentioning Remus in the group while we get gossipy details like Remus mentioning that McGonagall told him about Harry and Trelawney. It feels like such a gossipy thing to say to a former student, and indicates fondness. So I'd like to think she is also careful and wary with regard to bringing Remus up in front of Ministry authorities, esp potentially sensitive things like Sirius and him used to be best friends.

Harry looking into his parents wedding photo, with laughing Sirius :pleading_face:There is so much longing written into these scenes, and sadness. I have said before that Harry's series wide arc is to coming terms with his parents' death.

ooh interesting stuff from Hermione. Hagrid talks about how Dementors werent keen to let him go, and Hermione says, "but you were innocent!" and hagrid snorts, "Think that matters to them?" interesting stuff for Hermione and her belief and disillusionment in institutions arc.

Dumbledore offering crackers to Snape. Love how Snape indulges Dumbledore even as he hates it lollll.

Chapter 12, 13, 14

I know the fight is about the Firebolt, but I always felt the true reason Harry is angry with Hermione is that she went behind his back. And Ron is siding with Harry. (Although it is funny that it is Crookshanks that technically placed order for the broom)

Also, interesting note about Voldemort - he refers to Lily as "silly girl" and in the most disparaging way possible, when in reality it is her sacrificial magic that stopped him. This is in contrast to how he talks about James - "Face me like a man, straight backed and proud, like your father died". It is taunt, but a compliment infused in the taunt. (We will notice this in his fixation with his father, and rather passive interest in his mother as well - and the interest in his mother is because of her lineage - "I, in whose veins runs the blood of Salazar Slytherin himself, from my mother's side?")

Hermione disappearing into her workload, and Ron, despite being angry with her, interested in what she is up to. He even asked Ernie if she missed any Muggle Studies classes, lol.

How interesting that Lups mentions that the Dementor's Kiss is the fate that awaits Sirius Black, completely unprompted by Harry. It is clearly something that bothers him. ("Do you think anyone deserves that?"). Since he read it in the Prophet in the morning, it is clearly a news that he was still processing.

"Do you really think so? Do you think anyone deserves that?" - it is obviously one way for him to process the news, but it is also a way for Lups to open space for Harry to talk about what he is thinking and feeling.

Snape reminding McGonagall that Gryffindor will be out of running for 8th year in a row if they lose the match, lol. Snape and McGonagall's background Quidditch rivalry is hilarious. This happened in CoS too ("We should get Potter off the Quidditch team until he is ready to be truthful" "The cat wasn't hit over the head with a broomstick")

Harry suggesting they make up with Hermione, and Ron tells him where she is. I get the feeling that Ron was waiting to make up with Hermione after the initial anger. He engages with her, tries to figure out her schedule and it seems to me that the only thing really stopping him is Harry's feelings and he was waiting for Harry's go ahead.

"Ok side with Ron, I knew you would" - the beginning of the series, where the boys choose each other, and Hermione knows it. This changes when Ron becomes aware of his romantic feelings for Hermione, and that forces him to step back from his buffer role, and Harry and Hermione dynamic goes through transitional storm as a result.

Hermione came to watch the match. The juxtaposition of the Fred and George juggling bottles and the festivities, and Hermione reading Home Life and Social habits of British Muggles (which she doesn't have to) really adds to the loneliness of the picture.

I don't know if this was mentioned, but Lupin keeps asking Harry that maybe it's time to stop during the Patronus chapter. I do think it's because he is seeing the physical toll it's costing him, but I'd like to think it could also be because Harry has become an earpiece to James' last moments, and Lupin is caught off-guard. His grief is rising back up and it writes "Ready?" said Lupin, who looked as though he was doing this against his better judgement.(via @thecat-isblogging-blog)

We can see Lupin losing a bit of his careful control when Harry asks him about Sirius. Not only has Lupin just gone through the circle of grief again in a space of a few minutes, but now Sirius being bought up is asking for his anger. When Harry assumes Lupins knew Sirius as well, Lupin responds very quick and 'out of character': "What gives you that idea?" he said sharply. (Also via Cat)

Sirius breaks into the dormitory with a knife. He gifts Harry a knife for Christmas later on. (@artemisia-black brought this to my attention, but he seems to have a thing for knives. )

Love how immediately Neville connects Harry to being his protector, he steps behind Harry when he sees Snape.

Obviously Snape enjoys catching harry in trouble, but his dialogue here about worrying about Harry's safety (also his life mission) is also him. ("Let other people worry about his safety!").

"Mr Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business" - this insult is essentially displaying Remus' anxiety over Snape "sneaking around, trying to get them expelled". And Sirius' insult, is on his intelligence ("Mr Padfoot would like to register his astonishment that an idiot like that ever became professor"). Insulting people's intelligence is go to insult for both Sirius and Snape. James' insult goes for his appearance ("ugly git") which is appearance based, and most likely to do with his jealous streak regarding Snape and Lily. And Peter follows James' lead in the ugly insult and "advises him to wash his hair, the slimeball."

I will never get over the detail of Lups clapping his hand and looking around cheerfully when Ron comes in XD covered this scene between Lups and Snape in more detail here

Remus made Sirius and James "feel ashamed of themselves sometimes". I'd imagine it would be similar to how he handled this - cover up for them as he did for Harry, and lets them hear it in private. Although some of the harshness of what Remus said here is because he agrees with Snape, and recognises his own guilt in this situation, so he is angrier.

There is something about the fact that Hermione comes to them when she gets the letter that Buckbeak is being executed that is really, really vulnerable of her? She can wait until Hagrid tells them himself, but she needs them in this highly charged emotional moment.

I love how immediate the trio's priorities shift - both Harry and hermione discuss the unfairness of the situation, and when Hermione says she has no hope, Ron says there is. "You won't have to do all the work alone this time Hermione. I'll help." Ron's offer of solidarity really gets to Hermione and she apologises to him. And that's pretty much all he needed to hear from her ("I am really sorry about scabbers") and he quickly moves to assure her- "he was a bit old. You never know, mum and dad might get me an owl now." (ron's issue with hermione is similar to his issue with Harry in DH - "you are dismissing my feelings and devaluing my needs. What is important to me is not important to you, and therefore I am angry.")

Lucius is still a background antagonist in this novel, even though he doesn't make an appearance. And like Chamber of Secrets, Hagrid is once again in trouble because of his vulnerable status in the wizarding society.

The exam chapters are so endearingly weird - the teapot into tortoise and how they are all worrying about how some of their tortoise still has spout, or breathe steam. And harry overdoing his cheering charms that meant ron had to be taken to a private classroom for over an hour cos he was doubling up with hysterical laughter.

[artist-issues]

Hello! It's been a while since I was last on your ask inbox. I hope you are doing very well. This is perhaps going to be more of a rant than a regular ask, but I need to say this. I know people are very understandably quite over the topic of TLM 1989 vs TLM 2023 and most would probably prefer to sweep it under a rug. I really can't blame them for letting it go, but given that it's been almost a year since it came out, we could look at it in "retrospect" (I don't think that's quite the right word hehe) and I have to say, the way a lot of its stans continue to talk about this movie like it surpassed the original and even have this slightly disrespectful tone towards it is already very irritating, but one of the things that definitely irritated and even straight-up angered me the most about its reaction was the way they, as a collective, threw OG Eric under the bus in order to prop up the LA version. They literally said that the LA version had deeper feelings and cared far more about Ariel than his original counterpart and the "solid proof" they use to prove this was the Kiss The Girl where in the animated he refused to kiss her whereas in the LA version he was very willing to kiss her and the other scene was where he let Ariel slip down to the ground in the animated whereas in the LA he held her all "protective". They used this as proof that the original was practically a "careless douchebag" compared to the LA one who is the true "romantic and sensitive guy" and that really, really pissed me off, and I know I shouldn't let things like that upset me so much, but it goes to show that none of them ever paid any amount of attention to the original movie. They were practically dragging the original Eric all across the internet for that to prop up the LA version, not taking into account the context of absolutely anything at all. Literally almost nobody viewed him as a douchebag for that and the moment this movie comes along, all of a sudden, he doesn't really care for her and is trash??? They clearly forgot about the "I lost her once. I'm not gonna lose her again" scene, which was excluded in the LA version because he DID give up on looking for her after his mom told him to forget about her because "They can't be together". So much for being such an amazingly caring and romantic guy 🙄 I know you also see through the insane nonsense that is that argument, specially as someone who analyzes classic Disney movies so thoroughly and sees things about them that the average viewer can't see. This seems kind of like a rant, but I saw something related to that and I got so mad. People (outside of the TLM fandom) have always dismissed him as "bland", but this movie seems to have provoked a level of hatred to be thrown at him because they don't find some of his reactions to be "good" and "romantic" enough, but all it shows is how little they actually appreciate and understand the original material. Forgive me for my somewhat long and heavy rant, but I wanted to get it off my chest, and I believe you will understand why this made me so mad even a year later. I'd really like to see your thoughts and feeling on this topic. I certainly let mine be known! 🤣

No, I agree! I have a very dear friend who is also fond of analyzing movies and she, too, loves the Live Action Eric more than the original. And I think people are falling prey to one really subliminal, psychological thing here—we're adults now. And Live Action Eric is handsome, and feels more adult, because he's live-action. So there's this aspect of it that we really weren't feeling or paying attention to on the same level in the animated version: it's basically just his sex appeal. I hate saying it. I hate saying it like that.

But I have to because when you realize that what you're saying is correct—there is NO sense in which Eric in the LA is more caring than the real Eric—then you have to go, "okay, if it's not that, then what is it?"

It's that he has scruff. And a British accent. And a wet-fabric low-cut white shirt on. And then suddenly a movie that was about simple, innocent, young love that you could read about in a fairy tale starts to feel a little more angsty, a little more about passion, a little more like The Vampire Diaries, etc.

I'm not saying they're just preferring the LA Eric carnally. (Sorry.) I'm saying, I think there's a difference between the maturity levels of the romance. Live Action wants you thinking about Eric in terms of adult longing. Animated wants you thinking about Eric in terms of childhood dreams. The problem isn't even that one is more noble than the other (although. yeah.) The problem is that the original movie used the relationship to symbolize an important theme, while the Live Action tries to make the relationship the theme, itself...and then like you said, it backs off on that, because the movie "can't be about a girl giving up her life for a boy," so all that's left is "wanting to date hot seaswept Eric vicariously through Ariel."

When you put something that was animated into Live-Action, it carries this stigma that the Live action will be more relatable and "deep" than the animated version, specifically for adults. So then it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy; the adults just choose to respond to material (like a romance between a prince and a mermaid) that is no deeper than the original as if it is deeper, simply because they went in there believing more in the depth.

That's about as plain as I can make that, I think.

You already covered why Eric is definitely caring in the original perfectly, so I won't go into that. But I do think that what people are missing is how good Disney used to be at making sure a character did what he was supposed to do for the story. Animated Eric's whole thing was that he wasn't going to give up on his Fated Dream Girl. He didn't know it was Ariel, but he wasn't willing to give up on her and jump in this girl he found on the beach's arms until he was sure his dream was all wrong. I think people miss that. I think people see his actions as "he wasn't that into Ariel" instead of "he's a good guy who's 1) nervous about kissing a girl and 2) still thinking about Another Girl he believes rescued him from drowning."

And that's punctuated, like you said, at the end when he realizes his Dream Girl was Ariel all along. And then of course he's sacrificing himself to go after her. He was always willing to. He just didn't know what he didn't know. Remember, Eric isn't Boy Ariel. But he does have this in common with her: he really has faith in something other people don't understand. For him, it's an ideal of true love. For Ariel, it's an ideal of a good world outside the one she lives in. But for both it boils down to love. So you're just seeing Eric act accordingly, until he knows that all along Ariel has been the fulfillment of his ideal.

Anyway. You're super kind, but I don't think I'm able to see things other people can't or even won't in Disney movies. I really think everyone sees them, but not everyone feels the need to verbalize them 😅 I also think what the Live Actions do is basically large-scale gaslighting. By "fixing" things that were not mistakes, and changing major aspects of the story while standing on the shoulders of nostalgia and the original's success, the Live Actions make a meta-commentary on the old movies. So people who loved the original Ariel are like, "oh yeah, good point, that always bothered me," when, no it didn't. Not enough to ruin the story.

Anywho. I missed your asks!

[thegeminisage]

star trek update time. once again, i've fallen behind, thanks again to hades. sunday* we watched "equilibrium" and "second skin" and last night* we watched "the abandoned" and "civil defense."

im typing this at fuck o clock monday night its scheduled to go up without me tmrw morning

equilibrium:

hi, sorry, the cold opening of them having dinner here......i could have watched a whole episode of this alone. odo learning to cook. kira thinking he's cute (HI???). bashir being precious about beets. sisko best cook ever. it was so good and i was a little wary when jadzia ruined it with a trill mood swing or whatever i was like damn this episode won't make me like dax any better unfortunately

actually though the episode was fine. the hallucinations were decently scary and i liked getting to know jadzia a little better ie about her hatred of doctors

it was also nice that 1. bashir stopped being a freak about her and 2. her hair is less big now. her falling asleep in his quarters (and her wanting the bottom bunk bc of curzon falling out of a tree) was so cute actually. i want to like her!!! i'm trying hard.

i also really liked the mystery in this episode, but if we're talking times a trill has been traumatized by going into a bad host, what about that one guy who stole her in like season 2 or whenever...?

i wish dax had gotten to apologize to kira also :( women should be kissing not fighting

i do LOVE when sisko calls jadzia old man. i think it's so fun. the gender of it all. i also really liked his little line about how he still misses curzon sometimes but would also be devastated if anything happened to jadzia. dax both is and isn't curzon, both is and isn't jadzia...where that divide is and what makes up dax vs what makes up jadzia is really fascinating to me, i wish we explored it more

scene in the pool at the end i was so afraid she was gonna get naked. thank god.

second skin:

hhhhholy fuck

so, i loved this episode right up until the very last second. firstly, every kira episode is great. she's fantastic and so well-written and such a talented actress, i'm obsessed with her. secondly, we flirted with an amnesia plot for a hot second which was so fun. thirdly, what the FUCK

i love also, hi, that kira unpacked so much of her thoughts about the missing week of her life in odo's office. he's literally her sounding board. is this thing on? they love each other

the sheer raw fucked up factor of kira waking up AS A CARDASSIAN. she looked like she wanted to tear off her own skin and who can blame her. i hardly recognized her

GARAK IS HERE. i really love whatever he's going going on with sisko. "this is extortion" "yes it is" and also "that's the first totally honest thing you've ever said to me" every single conversation they have is like. garak flirts for fun and for sport with everyone in this show (INCLUDING KIRA???) and sisko is constantly meeting him in the middle . also, him putting the fear of god into that ship that tried to board them <3

the mystery of this episode was so intriguing. i was on the edge of my seat waiting for the gang (INCLUDING ODO!!!) to rescue kira. i wanted to figure out the Truth, bc obviously she's not a fucking cardassian. but i do feel they dropped the ball a little at the end

firstly, it seems too convenient that kira happens to look SO much like the real illiana that her OWN FATHER could not tell them apart. yeah, yeah, ten years, but are we serious rn?

SECONDLY, i don't think kira getting teary when given this keepsake (which was already weird) and declaring this cardassian dissident to be a "good man" is very IC. she's only come to that kind of understanding with one cardassian before (guy who pretended to do war crimes), and given the traumatic nature of this whole ordeal, i would have expected her to have mixed feelings/have trouble expressing this aloud, even if she did believe it. so we ended on kind of a weak note there, overall though incredible experience

the abandoned:

first, when i said "give odo a baby" i did not mean it like this.

second, dad sisko. my best friend sisko. sisko holding a baby, sisko missing his own baby, sisko sisko sisko my beloved

uhhh sisko not doing good with his own son because...drummroll please...jake is still dating the dabo girl

i genuinely thought this was a throwaway line but we have a whole fucking PLOT in here

i don't understand sisko at the end of this ep being like "yeah they can keep dating." ik this show is 30 years old but JAKE IS SIXTEEN. THE DABO GIRL IS 20. she seems nice and definitely she shouldn't be judged for being a dabo girl and if this character were like 18 i'd be like, okay, that's two years, she's only technically an adult, but TWENTY? at this age, 4 years is a HUGE gap

also, her tits were pushed so far out i wasn't even sure if they were real or not...HE IS SIXTEEN. like yes he knows what tits are but she is an ADULT??? eugh.

ANYWAY, odo's quarters!!! i like that he finally has a real room and doesn't just live in a bucket at work like presumably the cardassians made him do. kira bringing him a housewarming gift and wanting a peek at what he had going on in there was genuinely so sweet i wanted to kerm. i'm glad we got that since they argued later BUT win for me bc we also ended the episode on them

rip odo's trauma :( lab specimen ptsd meets founders identity crisis for a total fucjing breakdown. he did pretty good considering

civil defense:

10/10 EPISODES THIS ONE WAS AMAZING

lots of really fun sisko moments in this. i love when he gets to save the day and i love when he hangs out with jake. jakes was extremely brave and helpful too he saved their asses a bunch of times. today he got to be one of the grown-ups

GARAK IS HERE! i love how he showed up to help and then everything became immediately worse. every time you'd think "it cannot possibly get worse than this" it does

odo and quark essentially being locked in an elevator together. odo calling him devious (honorific). quark calling odo a guy with integrity (derogatory). i still don't Love quark but he's extremely funny and his scenes with odo are always a riot

STAR OF THIS SHOW GUL DUKAT. he showed up to laugh at their predicament and generally be unhelpful which was pretty funny but also i was a little mad at him and then he threatened kira which made me REALLY mad at him (she was so solid though she didn't budge and inch hell yes girl) and then he. got trapped on the space station also which was FUCKING hilarious. like i had been just mad enough to enjoy seeing him suffer under the reverse uno and find it IMMENSELY satisfying. you thought GARAK was a cringefail loser at getting this space station to work? he has nothing on gul dukat, who managed to not only make it EVEN WORSE but lock himself out of every system on the station. incredible work

absolutely though the best part of this episode BY FAR was when gul dukat was flirting with kira and nobody realized it but garak and he called him out on it 1. humiliating him in front of his crush 2. roasting him (bc anyone could see kira would have better taste) 3. reminding him that he's married 4. propping up kira herself bc garak supports women's rights and bajorans rights and also their wrongs. garak diss track when.

anyway, this episode hit the perfect balance between tense and funny, every single character had something fun to do or say, fucking excellent television

TONIGHT: um. um the first tng movie. um. the one with. the one where. please don't make me say it

[palettehao]

It's so crazy to me that throughout season 4 they made it a point to not have Mike ask El if she's okay ever in any bad situation she goes through.

Look at the roller rink scene and following, he instead makes snarky comments instead of comforting her and then when he does you know the whole "from Mike" scene happens and he starts invalidating her feelings, when they reunite he doesn't ask if she's okay it's Will who does, during the monologue we don't know if he asked afterwards but probably not given the current theme

And I just think it's really interesting that they decided to show his constant lack of comforting El (not even just in this season) compared to how he always comforts Will

Mike is super performative in his relationship with El especially when it comes to materialistic gifts or showing that "oh my God we're dating we're gonna go kiss now" but despite how much effort he puts into that performance he never puts in any effort to actually show emotional vulnerability in their relationship nor put the care in actually being a good boyfriend to El.

Throughout every season we see Mike asking Will if he is okay even if Will has done nothing saying otherwise and he makes sure Will is okay by asking multiple times or checking up on him and such, he doesn't do that with El (he might have done it a few times in S3 I think but still not as much as with Will, wherra lot of his worry lies) he genuinely wants to make sure Will is okay at all times and make sure they're okay, like how he will fight to make sure him and Will are on good terms, how he makes sure he always gets will back in a supernatural occurrence or in one that he unfortunately made on his own.

He's adamant in finding Will yet not finding El (S1 vs S2), he goes crawling back to Will when they fight but not with El, he can confide with his best friend but he doesn't confide in his girlfriend (even when it's about their relationship problems??), He owns up to his mistakes and the things he has done with Will but literally with nobody else and etc so much more that I just won't get into

The gist is he works so much harder in his relationship with Will then he does with his own girlfriend or with any of his other friends

He fights for Will, he confides in Will, he comforts Will, he's emotionally vulnerable with Will, he admits his faults when it comes to Will, and he's just genuinely the best version of himself when he is with Will

I'm rambling and have no idea where I was going with this now, but yeah it's interesting and some of my many random thoughts

[nonpracticinghumanbeing]

Why I'd Prefer Izzy's Revenge: An Essay

A recent exchange with @bookshelfdreams about Stede's Revenge vs. Izzy's Revenge got me thinking A LOT. About how people were surprised I'd prefer Izzy as my boss over Stede. And thinking back to my professional life, yes, I absolutely would.

Stede's Revenge is disorganized to a degree that would make it impossible for me to function there. I literally left my job - which paid quite well and had nice benefits and colleagues I liked - over being told to "find myself something to do" one time too many. It both gave me anxiety AND made me lose my respect for my superiors for not being able to organize my work properly. Now I have a job where each morning my boss tells me exactly what he wants me to do on any given day and I've never been more productive or less anxious about a job.

AND I'm the same with my personal life as well. (It involves a discussion of kink, so the rest is under the cut).

I play around with online Doms a lot. I usually do scenes with anyone who contacts me unless they insist on crossing my hard limits. It's a huge part of the thrill to be treated as "public property" by any stranger who contacts me.

But. The only Doms I bond with and form longer relationships with (which sometimes stop being just about kink and evolve into us just chatting about random stuff) are those who insist on punishing my every infraction, no matter how minor. I know very well that I'm easily distracted and don't have the best attention span, so if I forget something I was ordered to do, I need to be punished. That's how I learn to do better, that's how I grow. And that's how I know they care. If a Dom lets my mistake slip, it makes me feel like they don't care enough to even be bothered to come up with a punishment. If someone does care enough to point out my mistakes and correct them, I usually feel so damn elated that I don't even really need aftercare at the end.

So yeah. There totally are people who would prefer Izzy's Revenge. There's structure there. And order. And punishment can really make one better. (Sure, Izzy overdid his punishments a lot, but he's such a hardcore masochist himself I'm not surprised he forgot not everyone can take as much as he can.) Izzy's Revenge would make me feel safe, Stede's Revenge would make me feel anxious every single day.

[the-paper-monkey]

Hello, how are you?? Hope you're having a great weekend!! I was reading the traveling cabinet and it left me wondering, if Draco actually wanted to end things, would that Tom kill him? He knows way too much to not be a liability. Or would he not let him go at all? I'm curious as to what he would do, if they hadn't achieved a compromise and if Draco was actually willing to leave him (I don't believe he ever would be, tbh) Anyway, you're a great writer, thanks for sharing your works!!

I swear I answered something similar to this, but I cannot for the life of me find my reply. I assume it's buried in an AO3 comment section somewhere because it's not in my ask tag.

When Tom considers killing Draco in The Travelling Cabinet, they're not yet in a relationship. Tom still thinks of him as an annoying roommate but a useful hot water bottle who cooks and pays half the rent. Even then, he's still somewhat uneasy about it, though he doesn't have the self-awareness to recognise why. Tom from Bluebeard onward wouldn't ever even consider killing Draco unless it was Draco's life vs his own, in which case his own always comes first.

'Would Tom let him/her leave?' is always the awkward question in any superficially healthy portrayal of a relationship with him. Given his track record, I would say... no. He would see it as a betrayal and his empathy is not developed enough to be capable of or willing to see it from Draco's perspective. He understands, in theory, that Draco is a sentient being who continues to exist when Tom isn't in the room, but he doesn't instinctively comprehend that on a deeper level.

Their relationship is quite fluffy in that series but if you read between the lines, you can see Tom's disinterest in Draco's feelings from the closing scenes of TTC. Whether Draco has any interest in him is not even factored in; he simply decides that he wants Draco, and that's that. Luckily, Draco has been quietly pining away for a while, but to Tom, that's irrelevant. What he wants, he'll take. Doesn't mean Draco is having a bad time... unless he did want to leave. But I don't think they'd ever find themselves in a situation where Draco would try to leave, regardless of what Tom does. I mean, he literally found out his boyfriend was Voldemort and in all his spiralling never once considered leaving him.

[snickerdoodlles]

things i would change in lita if i were in charge:

put Rain in a dorm room instead of living at home

a large part of why Phayu/Rain doesn't work for me is because we don't get to see Rain develop on his own...ever, really. he's in college, but he's living at home, living off his parents' money, still updating his mom on his where abouts like he's in high school. he goes from being closely entwined with/dependent on them to being highly dependent on Phayu. Phayu/Rain didn't come off as "Rain's making stupid and risky decisions but that's part of growing up," which i would've enjoyed, it comes off as ".....no, seriously Rain, can you make this decision?"

moving Rain into a dorm would've given him some much needed independence. even if though he would've still been reliant on his parents financially, there's still the growth that comes from being away from your parents' daily influence, managing your own space, managing your own personal well-being, etc. that would've been Rain's starting point for independent growth. vs canon, where Rain's start in independent growth was an intensely sexual relationship with a highly independent guy (nooot really anything i'm comfortable with myself). Rain can enjoy being coddled/spoiled/etc (which i like! good for him!), but the writers never gave him a chance to figure out who he was on his own, so the relationship as is doesn't land for me :/

more Phayu interacting with the garage family

i really like the glimpses of Phayu's character that we get. he has a lot of contradictions that look like so much fun to explore, but his characterization often gets shuffled to the side in favor of kink. the most interesting Phayu scenes are always the ones where it's not just him and Rain which......really sucks. the Prapai/Sky sex scenes reveal a lot about them as individual characters as well as how they interact with each other. Phayu/Rain sex scenes kinda touch on how they act together, but the main thing they do is tell me more than i want to know about the writers' personal kinks. hell, most of what Rain learns about Phayu as a person is discovered through other people--which is really annoying! i want to be learning more about this guy through his interactions with Rain, not primarily the gossip other people tell Rain. that doesn't happen until like, ep6-7, which is the literal end of their personal arc and mostly spent away from each other. sighs.

more Saifah

quality character, highly underutilized. i love his eyerolls, but the writers never really did much with him to bring him past that point :( i can extrapolate a lot, but canon developed Sig in the second half of the show more than they did Saifah for all of it. Saifah is Phayu's literal twin brother and business partner, and some random architect student got more of a character than him. this is not a complaint on Sig, i fucking adore that guy, but it's a bizarre writing choice.

more kidnapping aftermath

seriously. what the fuck. TWO kidnapping scenarios, the entire reason why i watched this show, and you guys couldn't cut out any of the 1905t59488993e repeated scenes to give me more than 2 minutes of kidnapping aftermath? who the fuck even cares about trucks driving on roads

things i would not change in lita if i were in charge:

Chai showing up to rescue Phayu and Rain wearing a zebra print shirt. sensational. 10/10, no notes

[simpjaes]

were there any ideas for frenzy that u didnt end up putting in the story? like abt the plot or jake?

Oh yeah there were tons of ideas that didn't make the cut for the fic:

The first issue I had with deciding what route I wanted to take was deciding if reader truly finds out Jake stalks/stalked her vs. her never finding out.

It is quite obvious that I went in a route that somewhat includes the two, but there were entire story lines in my head for both ends of how the fic could have gone. I won't get into that though and stick with what the fic already is currently, and the ideas that were cut from it:

for starters,

there were times where I was going to have Jake steal items from your apartment if he wasn't staying with you. I did have to speed up the fic though, so there was a point in time where he would be back and forth with reader until her ex eventually showed up at her job and he ended up staying with her consistently rather than going home.

I'm talking, panty stealing to the max, placing cameras in her apartment, tracking her phone.

there were other instances as well that involved the ex being more threatening than he already was before Jake found himself beating his ass lmao. I had an entire scene written that involved Jake meeting the ex, duping him into believing Jake was a security guard, then leading him somewhere alone before it fades to black in a major ass kicking scene. That was removed obv.

There was another scene where reader actually went to Jake's apartment and asked about his camera, also noted that her apartment was literally right across from his own. she was going to be a little more cautious around him, which made him angry and go into super-perfect-boyfriend mode.

uhhh, me and @drunkhazed discussed the idea of the fic ending in death as well. The main focus was for Jake to, quite literally, kill her ex boyfriend in a fit of rage. I did ultimately choose to not go that route due to the fact that Jake likely would have been messy as hell with it, and he definitely woulda been thrown into prison lol

smut instances that were cut:

there were supposed to be several more smut scenes than what the fic ended up with at the end. I'm talking full on masochist Jake, and full on sadist reader. It was meant to be an incredibly emotional scene that involved her realizing that Jake really was an outlet, and that she enjoyed doing it about as much as he did. This involves instances of choking, slapping, scratching, gagging, breath play, and likely a scene where Jake faints himself.

Another instance where Jake was supposed to go back home and watch back the cameras I wanted him to put into her apartment, and ultimately find the reader touching herself. given, he woulda loved seeing that but hated it at the same time when she cries at the end and/or doesn't moan out for him. this would have led to the instance where reader mentions being wet in the fic (you may remember), and him being entirely ecstatic over the fact that it's because of him. He was supposed very nearly or accidentally ask why she doesn't get wet as she touches herself. But ofc she's so in awe of him that it blows right past her, and doesn't even ask why he knows she touches herself at all etc.

man, there's a ton more but this ask is already long enough :|

[sullina]

"I wanna write a book, but all I have is this one really cool scene!"

Then build on top of the scene!

Ask questions!

What leads up to the scene? What needs to be established and what needs to have happened for the scene to happen?

If it's a confrontation of some kind, then there are two (or more) parties who are in conflict.

This doesn't have to be "good guys vs bad guys fight", it can also be "a truth is revealed that was unknown to one of the parties beforehand, which makes them hostile to the other party" Example: Character As goal is to save character B, because character B is hostage to character C, who is a shared enemy of A and new character D. A and D have come together to discuss plans on how to defeat C, but as the discussion keeps going, it becomes apparent that D wants to use B, the hostage, as a sacrifice to defeat C. Since As goal is to SAVE B, they cannot agree to that plan, thus making A and D enemies and leading to a confrontation.

Also useful to ask when you only have one scene in mind and nothing else is: what rules govern your world?

These can be social rules, like idk, if you're considered a criminal, but not dangerous enough for the ruling power to arrest you, you still won't be allowed into any reputable establishments like shops or gatherings in a non-public space (think like some noble inviting "everyone" into his home for a party or something, but because you're a criminal, the guards won't let you in, regardless of whether you're dangerous or not)

If your world involves magic, then how does magic work? Is it a tangible thing that can be handled in the form of like magic stones, or is it an abstract thing, the existence of which is only known due to the effects that can be observed? Like, there's no way to give "magic" itself a form like a magic gemstone, but if someone casts "fireball", the fireball that was summoned through magic can be observed. If magic can be given form/contained in something, that could make way for common people with no magic training to use magic tools, like a fantasy stand-in for electricity (like how just about everyone can use a stove, but you need specialists to make and fix one).

Is magic a natural thing in your world? Are humans the only ones who can use it, or can it also be used by animals? If it CAN be used by animals, that means it can be absorbed by living beings, including plants and also humans and any other fantasy races you might have.

The next question: is magic an everyday thing? And how much magic does the average person use? Is magic literally everywhere, or are there only a few places that have enough magic concentrated to have a significant effect on whatever is there? Is it known why only these places have a high magic concentration? If high magic places are rare, magic itself might be rare as well, leading to anything magic being rare and thus sold at expensive prices, so only the rich might have anything magic.

There's tons i could write about magic specifically, because I already have and really like the concept of magic, but I'm getting off track here.

The point is: if you have a scene, build onto it, or beneath it? Like, who are your characters? Why are they having this scene? What exactly are they doing and why? How does the scene start and end? What is accomplished afterwards because of this scene?

If you answer to every single question is "I don't know", that's fine, but if you wanna write something with this scene in mind, you need to start finding the answers to these questions. They don't need to be precise, you just need to get the gist of what is happening.

"Who are your characters?" Are they, within the context of the story, considered good? Bad? Are they on the same side or are they clashing? What is their relationship to one another?

Remember, YOU are the writer. You're in the drivers seat.

it's your decision where the story goes. That's the fun of writing after all^^