#walk-thru zoo

[h0ney8ee]

im about to buy a zoo membership for next summer bc i went today much later in the afternoon on a school day and it was so nice. like it was almost entirely empty and we got to take our time looking at whatever we wanted for as long as we wanted and i feel like more animals were out too because less people. look at these birds that flew right up to me. leftie has TWO bracelets

[nonstandardrepertoire]

fuck it, i'm bored and don't want to work on my opera, here's a post that's been in my head for ages about my premise for Entirprise, but actually good

so like obviously the first season is just them building the ship. the writers knew it at the time, it was always obviously the right call, UPN just thought they could get seasons 15 to 21 of The Next Generation and it was bad. the first season is them building the ship, you get to know the characters, and you get to know the geopolitical situation, both on Earth and with the Earth/Vulcan relationship

and then you launch right into the thick of Andoria and Vulcan gearing up for a horrific interstellar war. you do not introduce a new random alien species we have never heard of every week, because we are in the heart of what will become Federation territory and seriously, what happened to all of those people Enterprise encountered? why have we never heard from any of them in chronologically subsequent Stars Trek? (the Doylist answer is obvious here, it's the Watsonian one that i'm interested in.) you also do Not introduce the Klingons (or not yet, anyway), because if their space empire is so old and also so close to Earth, why have they not . . . conquered Earth already. (this also spares you from having to address the brow ridges thing, but also like, you can just not address that. you can just ignore it. it is not a thing that you have to deal with literally ever oh my g-d TV makeup capabilities change in 20+ years, it's fine, we can move on)

anyway, we launch into a Tense interstellar moment in our neighborhood and Archer is like "hey uh. what if, instead of war, you tried . . . talking?", and this is where i need to step back and talk about my Secret Worldbuilding Headcanon for the Star Trek universe

ok ok ok ok ok so first of all, let us suppose there are two big patterns that play out in a general way on planets that develop sentient life: on some, there's really only a small habitable range, so the developing sentient species in question spends a long time as effectively a single community, at least until they render the technology necessary to make more of their planet habitable. on other planets, you get a whole bunch of habitable territory, and developing species spread out and develop a lot of different cultures. often, as on Earth, these different cultural groups come into conflict with each other. in some cases, this conflict leads to extinction, and in some cases it leads to one group that is militarily successful taking over the planet wholesale. when this culture then takes to the stars, they continue the pattern, and this is how you get the roots of the Klingon and Romulan empires

this neatly explains the predominance of planetary monocultures, but i think it can also help explain why there seem to be so many interplanetary conflicts that devolve into attempted or successful planet-scale genocides. (and like! we see a lot of these across the various shows of the franchise! the galaxy is full of death and destruction!) because i think a lot of those species that follow that first pattern effectively won't have any experience in dealing diplomatically with cultures that are truly different from them. sure, they may have had civil wars and other kinds of internal conflict, but they would still have been in conflict with beings that were fundamentally similar to theirs. so like, they have diplomacy, theoretically, but we would consider it very rudimentary and pro forma — Vulcan and Andoria try talking, sure, but like, they are Very bad at it, and that is what sets them on the path to war, and having not had conflicts on a planetary scale, they don't have a strong sense of Just How Bad things can get, and the temptation to escalate to the point of war crimes is . . . strong

but! Earth has just come thru WWIII/the Eugenics Wars and has, very unusually, galactically speaking, managed to do so with a good deal of cultural diversity intact. and we have, Finally, figured out how to negotiate a lasting, durable, global peace. so when a mostly human crew launches out into our interstellar neighborhood and finds two planets on the brink of what has the potential for being a nasty little war, said crew is like "fuck no, absolutely not, you may not understand how bad a war like this can really get, but we do, because we have just been thru yet another one in our long and bloody history, and we are not willing to stand by and let you stumble into the same horrors we just ended"

and that, not "being sort of logical but also sort of emotional" or "the ability to work thru trauma" is the contingent historical fact that makes Earth a key catalyst for the creation of the Federation. because we have strong, direct, recent experience with existential planetary war and also the specific honed ability to negotiate with people very different from ourselves to prevent it

so season 2 is all about talking Andoria and Vulcan down from blowing each other out of the sky. we're not at the Federation yet, but we are starting to lay the very low-level groundwork

then you can have a third season where you sort of do an entwined Terra Prime/Kir'Shara arc on Earth and Vulcan across the third season — on the Earth side, you can pick up on the political groundwork laid in the first season to explore reactions to (including backlash against) Earth becoming something of a diplomatic somebody in the stellar neighborhood while Vulcan is going "who are these 'humans' to start meddling in our affairs?" and etc etc etc i haven't pinned this out beat by beat but the Themes are there and i think they actually mesh really nicely together, especially if you give them a little more space to breathe (you could even bring in the Aenar in a more sustained way if you wanted to keep Andoria in the mix — "how do you organize a planetary political system when you have two polities that are not that intreested in merging?" is genuinely an interesting question to explore, i think, and could be a nice antidote to some of TNG's "one world government only" weirdness)

anyway if you want to do more seasons here probably you can, but the last season can still be actually building the Federation, leading up to the signing of the charter — give us the geopolitics of it! give us the delicate high-stakes negotiations! have somebody walk away from the table completely! idk, make compelling television!

and in all this, instead of having Archer be Generic Starfleet Good Boy #47 (into, uh, "guy who does torture a bunch"), you can lean into the idea that Vulcans and Andorians kind of look down on humans as incompetent newcomer rubes to the interstellar playing field: have Archer be folksy and charming, but clever, good at luring people into the positions he wants them in by letting them underestimate him and then outfoxing them, very "oh gosh, you seem to have wound up in an unwinnable diplomatic pickle, how convenient that we can get you out of it :)" or w/e. he can have a character that's very distinct from Kirk, Picard, Sisko, or Janeway without being the Vaguely Racist Guy Who Punches Diplomats

also make Hoshi and T'Pol gay you cowards ok bye

[plushie-lovey]

I wish I could take my plushies with me to cool places and take cute pictures of them there. Sadly I don't go out often, and on the very rare occasions when I go, its with friends who'd probably think I'm weird for toting around a plushie to [insert activity here]

[why-animals-do-the-thing]

California zoo accessibility data dump

I just recently got back from a short (and fully covid-cautious) zoo road trip in Oregon and California, and wanted to share my notes re: accessibility at the facilities I visited. I'll get this all integrated into the spreadsheet, too.

Wildlife Safari - Winston, Oregon

This is a large drive-thru safari park with a free walk-about area attached that contains some small exhibits. Guests stay inside their cars the entire drive-thru, although there's at least one place to stop and sit in a gazebo to rest and use the bathroom (porta-potty only). You can pull over to watch animals for longer, and go through multiple times if you missed anything. It's a long drive-thru and there isn't really a good way to truncate the experience if you've got some kind of emergency. The roads are not flat, but they're well maintained and not bumpy.

The walkabout area is very small and contains bathrooms, food options, and other guest services. The paths are mostly concrete and well tended, although you do have to cross the steam train tracks to get to lion/some of the lemur viewing. I believe the Australia walkabout area was also unpaved. There's lots of parking in a big, flat, paved lot.

Sacramento Zoo - Sacramento, CA

This is a very cute, small inner-city facility - a good option if you don't want to try to walk a huge zoo in one day. There's lots of shade from all the plants and a good amount of benches throughout, including picnic tables with shade canopies. The paths are almost entirely flat and paved, with the exception of a boardwalk ramp up to the giraffe feeding and okapi viewing platforms. The cafe has gluten-free and vegetarian listings (maybe vegan?) on their menu. No straws are provided for animal safety, but if you need one, they can give you a reusable curly-straw from the slushies (kinda long and awkward for a normal cup) as an accommodation. They've got both water fountains and water bottle filling stations. Being build in a larger city park and recreation complex, there isn't a dedicated parking lot just for the zoo: the closest is across the street, shared with another attraction, and is kinda small. I've never had issues finding parking when I've gone, but sometimes it does involve a bunch of walking to get to the zoo entrance - if you have mobility or stamina limitations, probably best to get dropped off at the entrance and wait (there are benches).

San Francisco Zoo - San Francisco, CA

The SF Zoo is huge. There's lots of green / garden / swamp space that doesn't have habitats in it, but it means exhibits can be pretty far away, so plan your route accordingly. (Going out to the grizzly bears is the longest loop). Depending on the time of day, there's not always a ton of shade for guests either. There's a decent amount of benches, and quite a few are in decent proximity to animal viewing. After a somewhat long but not steep hill right at the entrance, the paths are all paved and fairly flat. There's a hill going down into/up from the Australia area / kids playground, but it's the only one I really noticed. There's a long elevated boardwalk through the lemur habitats that connects to the top of the new Madagascar construction - if you can't do stairs, as of Spring 2024, that's the only way to get up there to look down on the mandrills or see the top of the fossa habitat. (It's still under construction, so there might be an elevator in the building in the future). Back by the grizzlies, there's an old indoor rainforest building - while there's buttons to automatically open the door going in, I didn't find any on the first inside door going out. It makes sense they don't want both doors to open at once since it's a bird airlock, but not having independent ones on each door meant the day I used an ECV I got stuck in there until a nice staff member noticed.

All three times I've ever been to SF most of the little food kiosks haven't been open, and the vending machines for drinks have been hit and miss - so bring your own, or stock up at the cafe if you need to have supplies with you - but there are water fountains and water bottle filling stations around the zoo. There are interpretive audio boxes through the zoo in English and Spanish, used with a key you get at the entrance(?), but I heard a lot of complaints in passing about some of them not working. There's lots of parking at the zoo in a flat paved lot, and there's a specific dropoff area on one side for rideshares/mobility needs.

Oakland Zoo - Oakland, CA

To be clear up front - Oakland was the hardest facility to visit on this whole trip, with regards to mobility. We went twice, and I used an ECV (electric scooter) one and walked the other. Neither option was easy and both were exhausting. Oakland is a super hilly facility - you basically have to drive up a major hill to get to the zoo. The bottom half of the lower zoo can only be reached by going down pretty steep paths. The hills are also not graded to be "flat", so if you're in a wheelchair or ECV, you're going to have to lean to compensate for the tilt and balance the chair... while controlling it going down a steep hill. It's exhausting and kinda scary. (I don't even let other people carry my camera because $$, but I had to ask for help so I could focus on driving the ECV on those hills). There's also a lot of areas of the pathways that are not in the best repair, or patterned with pressed-in images, and multiple places actually have brass bugs embedded in the pavement so that they stick out above the surface. Lots of tripping hazards and/or things to rattle your teeth out rolling over. A couple places in the upper zoo (the California wilds area) the paths switch from paved to sand and back again, for drainage, maybe? On the upside, there's a lot of benches everywhere, including directly across from prime viewing areas.

Getting up to the upper zoo requires using a gondola - there's no walking option. You can actually take wheelchairs and ECVs on these, but you have to be ready to advocate for yourself. Normally, they don't stop the carriages completely, and expect people to walk on while they're still moving slowly. You can ask them to slow them down for you (I did, because knee issues plus torque is bad), or stop it completely if you need the time/help. When I took an ECV on, they had me disembark and get in one carriage, and they loaded it into the subsequent ones. This is fine because I can walk and stand on concrete for a while without it, but I'm not sure how that practice would work for people who need their mobility aids the whole time. They were very nice about managing the stopping and the loading and didn't make it feel like an imposition, too. If they stop the carriages completely at any point, there will be a loud buzzer/alarm when the ride starts back up. If you're close, it's pretty loud and startling. As they leave the track at the bottom the gondolas tip and dip a little, which can be scary if you're not expecting it - I think it's just the transition of the car from the loading bay onto the track itself. The rest of the ride is very smooth. The track is pretty high up and gives a great view of the bay and the surrounding cities, but face uphill if you don't do well with heights. Once at the upper zoo, the path from bald eagles through jaguar is mostly a boardwalk, but it's not too bumpy.

Oakland's parking is hard if you're not there early in the day, IMO. The overflow parking gets pretty far from the entrance, and starts to go up the hill towards the upper zoo. If the lot looks busy, drop anyone with mobility/stamina issues off at the entrance before parking. Unlike many other zoos I've visited, Oakland's ECVS have added sunshades, which is really nice (and which I should have used).

Monterey Zoo - Salinas, CA

This is a fairly small facility with most habitats on one level, but some big cats and bears are up a pretty big hill. The walkways are paved and flat, and there's an ADA-graded boardwalk ramp that takes you to the top of the hill. The pipes used for the handrails on both the stairs and the ramp get very hot in the sun, however. There's a boardwalk up to the rhino overlook. They indicate that their bathrooms are accessible, but the ones in the main building didn't have bars for transferring - I didn't check the ones up on the hill. At one point in the day speakers along the path started playing really loud pop music (drowned out the birds) and it was very overwhelming. There's lots of handicapped parking spots across from the front entrance, but if you don't have a tag, the rest of the spots are up a bit of a hill and a small walk from the entrance. They do have a note, though, that they can help if you need accessible parking and don't see any, so you could probably call/have someone to go in and ask for an accommodation.

Sequoia Park Zoo - Eureka, CA

This is another nice small facility, very doable for a half-day trip. The paths are paved and flat, and there's benches available. There's a lot of shade, although it can depend on the time of day, and places to fill a water-bottle. The sky-walk through the redwoods is accessible, but might be a little difficult depending on mobility limitations - its' a very sturdy boardwalk through the canopy of the tall trees. (I had more thoughts on this from my last visit, I'll dig out those notes). If you can do even part of it, it's worth it, and there's places to turn around. Because it's in a residential area of the town there's not a huge dedicated parking lot, but lots of street parking and a decent lot directly across the street. I've never had difficulty finding parking, and you can drop people off at the entrance easily.

[mistycreativelilacs]

Can you please write a Bruce Wayne imagine where he catches her singing or something cute like that?

Welp… it only took me -checks watch- three years to respond to this, but uh… here’s a 5000 word drabble I guess.

Kitchen Off Limits

About a year into living at Wayne manor you enacted an (ever growing) list of rules. Originally the list only had three rules on it:

1. Sunday is family day. Baring any Gotham destroying/world ending catastrophes everyone is to be in the dinning room no later than 11am for brunch followed by a previously voted on family activity.

2. Family Activity planning occurs on the first Saturday of the month, activities for the whole month will be decided then.*

*Attendance is NOT mandatory, however those who do not participate do not get to complain when we spend 3 Sundays in a row at the zoo.**

**No liberating animals from the zoo.

3. Monday thru Saturday the kitchen belongs to Alfred. Sunday morning’s the kitchen belongs to Mom*.

*That means no one, not even Alfred can enter the kitchen until AFTER brunch**.

**Yes Tim that includes you. You can wait for your morning cup of coffee***.

***ABSOLUTELY NO coffee pots, mini fridges, microwaves, blenders, hot plates, or dry food storage in your bedrooms or you WILL be personally hunting down every rodent and bug that comes crawling into the manor****.

****You can NOT train an army of cats to hunt vermin as a trade off for a mini fridge.

Certain amendments had to be made to the list with each new addition to the household. The final amendment to rule three inspired the creation of its own rule.

243. If you bring a pet into the house, YOU must personally care for it at all times. This includes feeding, grooming, walking, training and cleaning up after them as well as insure they have a proper habitat to live in*.

*Your bedroom is only a proper habitat for regular domestic animals (ie. dogs, cats, fish, small reptiles, small birds, caged rodents such as rats, Guinea pigs or hamsters and snakes, within reason - no large pythons). Large animals whether native to our region or exotic must be housed in a properly built enclosure on the grounds.

Needles to say the Wayne children kept you on your toes. Which brings us to now.

You awoke at the crack of dawn this morning to prep for the day. In a not so shocking twist, Damien had lied, cheated and outright bribed several of his siblings in order to get a zoo trip in this month. The Waynes were such regulars at the zoo (and contributed so much in donations) that they’d named an entire section after the family. The Wayne Reptile House (filled to the brim with several of the reptiles you’d ‘rescued’ from Damien’s room upon Alfred’s discovery of Damien’s unsanctioned renovation of his closet). It was important to you that the children experienced even just a smidge of normalcy amongst all the vigilantism.

You’re staring into the pantry, debating whether to do pancakes or waffles, when an old favourite song comes on the speaker. This was your favourite part of Sunday’s. Once everyone realized how serious you were about the rules, Sunday morning had become your alone time. If the kids were fighting, they handled it amongst themselves. If someone had a question, they went to Bruce or Alfred for answers. Mom was not to be disturbed.

The word Mom still brings a small smile to your face. You’d never really pictured yourself as a mother but when you’d stumbled your way into a romance with THE Bruce Wayne, he’d already gained 2 of your ever growing hoard of children. You’d stumbled your way into motherhood much the way you stumbled into Bruce’s arms.

You begin to softly hum to the song as you decide to just make pancakes and waffles. With a family full of crime fighters more was always the safer option. No one wants a repeat of Tim and Richard’s destructive fight for the last cinnamon bun. You had to spend a fortune redoing the dinning room after, replacing antiques was not cheap, and your heart still hadn’t recovered from the sticker shock. Needless to say the boys were still working off their debt by assisting Alfred in the daily runnings of the manor. As you got lost in the gargantuan undertaking of cooking for the whole Wayne clan, your gentle hums morphed to soft whispers of lyrics.

Just as you were frying the last batch of pancakes the opening chords of your and Bruce’s song came through the speakers. It would be more accurate to state that you’d unilaterally declared it your and Bruce’s song. During your second year of dating you had slowly begun introducing him to the world of romcoms. One particularly chilly fall day that year saw Bruce catching a cold. You took advantage of that to force him into a binge of some of the best and cringiest of your favourites from the 2000’s. Two particular movies seemed to make the notoriously stoic Bruce Wayne emotional. The obvious one being ‘Two Weeks Notice’, but it was the Hugh Grant, Drew Barrymore semi-musical ‘Music & Lyrics’ that would produce the perfect song for your and Bruce’s life together.

As the sounds of Hugh Grant and Drew Barrymore came through the speaker you began to sing in earnest.

‘I've been living with a shadow overhead

I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed

I've been lonely for so long

Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on’

Your mind drifted to how you and Bruce met. Recently heartbroken and determined never to let another man hurt you, you’d sworn of men and decided to dedicate all your attention to advancing at work. Your first steps were taking the assignment no one else wanted to touch with a ten foot pole. Being Bruce Wayne’s personal assistant. Those who succeeded at such a gargantuan undertaken seemed to excel through the ranks at Wayne Enterprises, but those who fell short well, you’d heard his last personal assistant had moved back home to small town Kansas and given up the corporate ladder completely.

Your first week had been a cake walk, seeing as Bruce had been away on business meetings in Europe. It’d given you time to get settled in and a system in place. You were determined to be the best personal assistant he’d ever had.

Upon Bruce’s first day back in the office, you’d mustered up all the courage you had and waltz into his office. With barely a good morning you’d launched into a tirade of how things were going to be and that unlike his past assistants you were going to set boundaries. He’d blinked at you slowly, and you were convinced you were about to be fired. His mouth opened and the word okay seemed to unintentionally fall out. You both stood there a moment, seemingly shell shocked at the interaction, before you gathered your wits. With a pivot of your heels you rushed out your own okay before returning to your desk.

Unbeknownst to you Bruce himself had been going through a touch of heartbreak, having had a fall out with his former paramour Selina. His accounts of your first meeting paint you in a much fiercer, more beautiful light. But you’re sure he’s simply remembering the day with rose tinted glasses seeing as you had a poorly concealed coffee stain on your blouse and your hair had definitely begun its escape from the clip you’d rushed it into on the train that morning. Nevertheless he claims it was your fierce determination that stunned him into submission and not his utter exhaustion from sleep deprivation.

‘I’ve been hiding all my hopes and dreams away

Just in case I ever need ‘em again someday

I’ve been setting aside time

To clear a little space in the corners of my mind’

The weeks following your initial meeting were a full of meetings, calls and insuring your boss took proper care of himself. It took exactly three days for you to realize he’d forget to eat, four to realize he seemed to not be sleeping either.

You quietly placed a standing order with the sandwich place down a couple blocks from the building, and then methodically went through Bruce’s calendar and put a two hour meeting blackout everyday around 2pm. You’d also had the couch that sat on the wall just outside his office doors moved into his office proper. The next day you simply waltzed into his office at noon and dropped the sandwich on his desk before returning to your own desk. Two hours later you waltzed in dropping a pillow and blanket on the couch and closed the blinds without a word. As you turned to leave Bruce questioned what you were doing. You simply informed him that you’d place a permanent daily block on meetings between 2pm-4pm and that his office doors would be locked for that period of time as well.

When asked, Bruce will claim that as the day he fell in love with you.

You continued on that way for months, the world seeming to move in a blur around you. Your friends encouraged you to start dating again, but you just weren’t sure you could ever trust a man again. Besides, work was so exhausting most days that you were certain you’d simply pass out at the restaurant if you did go on a date. What a terrible first impression that would make.

It was a seemingly unremarkable Tuesday morning when the world came screaming into focus again.

‘All I wanna do is find a way back into love

I can’t make it through without a way back into love

Oh’

You’d been tutting about the office while Bruce attended a meeting with Lucius in the lower levels of Wayne Enterprises. You had just started printing off a report for Bruce’s next meeting when your printer ran out of paper. Normally this would be a none issue, except for reasons unknown to you, the night cleaner had developed a habit of putting the box of printer paper on top of the bookcase in the corner. A bookcase that stood nearly three heads taller than you. He’d been doing it for weeks despite your many conversations with him about it. You had tried bringing it up to Bruce, but he just blamed it on the language barrier and claimed it as a non-issue since he could just grab it for you.

It was just your luck that the printer would run out when Bruce was in the midst of a meeting and wouldn’t be back for at least another hour, probably two seeing as his meetings with Lucius always seemed to go over their allotted time slot. You’d been certain the office would have a step ladder hidden around somewhere, but after nearly twenty minutes of searching and being put on hold with maintenance, you’d given up. You could just wait till Bruce returned, but you had only printed half of the first of ten copies of a 40 page report that was required for his next meeting. You’d begun cursing everyone from the night cleaner for his obsession with moving the paper to the head of marketing and research’s assistants for not sending the reports yesterday when you’d requested them. Difficult problems required creative solutions, however the only thing you had that was light enough to drag over to the bookcase while giving you enough height to grab a ream of paper was your office chair. As the head of the companies employee safety committee you knew this was a terrible idea, as Bruce Wayne’s golden assistant the risk of letting your boss down for the first time ever outweighed the risk to your personal safety.

Even with the chair you needed to climb the bookshelf to actually reach the shelf the paper was on. Ream firmly in your grasp you moved to step back into the chair. As your foot touched the chair your hand slipped from the shelf and you felt yourself go backwards. You closed your eyes and braced for impact but it never came. Instead you felt arms wrap around your back and hip, securing you to a firm chest. You opened your eyes coming face to face with Bruce. Had his eyes always been that blue?

“What the hell were you doing.” He was angry, his blue eyes tightening with worry. A warmth flitted through you at the thought that he cared about your safety.

“Grabbing the printer paper.” You gasped out, bending to grab the ream that had fallen to the ground when you’d lost your grip.

“You could have injured yourself if I hadn’t shown up in time.” Bruce was still in your personal space and it was starting to overwhelm you. ‘Had he always been this… large?’ He seemed to tower over you.

“Yes, well I wouldn’t have needed to do all that if the cleaner would stop placing my printer paper up there.” You’d stepped back from Bruce, needing something to keep you from ogling your boss, you began fiddling with the printer.

“You could have waited for me.” He got in your space again, his voice softer now as he took the paper from your shaking hands.

“Do you understand how ridiculous it is to have to wait for the CEO of the company just to load a ream of paper into my printer?” You huffed out, turning back towards him now. The two stood there, chest to chest just staring at each other. You didn’t want to be the one to back down first, but you weren’t sure how much longer you could keep from blushing while staring into to his eyes.

‘What was with you today? You’d never had a problem going toe to toe with Bruce before. Now suddenly your acting like a horny school girl, daydreaming about climbing this man like-

“Fine.” Bruce stalked off to his office, an indiscernible glower on his face, leaving you to ponder what the hell had just happened. And why you seemingly out of nowhere had very inappropriate thoughts about your boss.

That night marked the first of many failed blind dates, agreed to only after having decided that it was your lack of a love life that had you daydreaming about your boss.

The next morning the box of paper was on the bottom shelf of the bookcase.

‘I’ve been watching but the stars refuse to shine

I’ve been searching but I just don’t see the signs

I know that it’s out there

There’s gotta be something for my soul somewhere’

Things between you and Bruce changed after that day. You’d never realized how comfortable you two had become with one another until you suddenly weren’t. You’d taken to communicating with him almost exclusively through emails and his calendar due to how awkward everything had become. He’d try to ask you about your life and you’d just clam up, not wanting to tell the object of your recurring lusty dreams about your string of failed dates. Failed because after less than two minutes you’d start comparing all of them to Bruce. The whole thing was getting so out of hand, you’d started seriously contemplating putting in for a transfer.

You’d been so lost in thought it took Bruce loudly clearing his throat for you to notice him standing in front of your desk.

“Yes, Mr. Wayne?” You’d resolved that complete professionalism was the only sure way to put everything back to normal. Or at least it will hopefully allow you to cling to some semblance of normal until you stop chickening out and put in for reassignment.

“I was wondering,” he seemed nervous, fidgeting with the snow globe I kept on the edge of my desk. “Do you have a date to the Christmas Gala?” Oh. He’s not? Is he? He couldn’t possibly-“I was just thinking if you didn’t have one, we could go together.” He was- “just as friends. We are friends aren’t we?” n’t.

“Yes, Mr. Wayne I suppose I’ve come to regard you as a” the word friend seemed to catch in your throat “friend over these last few months. But, to be quite honest with you, I wasn’t planning on attending the Christmas Gala.”

“You have too. In fact, I’m making it a mandatory requirement of your job that you have to be there. I’ll pick you up at 7pm.” He didn’t even give you time to respond before waltzing back into his office. It took all of 30 seconds for you to follow after him.

“You cannot force me to go to the gala Mr.Wayne.” You’d stopped in front of his desk, arms crossed over your chest.

“Why not?” He leaned back in his chair, smug smile glued to his face.

“Because I’m a human being with free will and, according to the Wayne Enterprises Employee Handbook, attempting to force me to attend would constitute harassment.” The smile slowly dropped from his face as he rose from his chair.

“If you truly don’t want to attend, I won’t push the matter.” He took slow, deliberate steps towards you, halting just far enough to be considered proper, but still close enough for you to catch the scent of his cologne. “However, it’d mean a lot to me if you did attend.” You’d been so distracted by his eyes and the seemingly sincere look on his face that you hadn’t even noticed he’d reached for your hand. You stood there utterly unmoored by the events of the past few minutes. You mentally shook your self out and opened your mouth to once again decline his invitation.

“Okay.” You were stunned with utter disbelief at the disconnect between your brain and your mouth. Bruce smirked.

“Perfect, like I said early I’ll pick you up around 7pm. If we’re going together, I really should match my tie to your dress. What colour is it going to be?” He’d started heading back to his desk.

“Mint.” You mumbled out. If you were going to be photographed on Bruce Waynes arm, even as just a friend, there was only one dress in your wardrobe that was even close to passable. Turns out you would get a second wear out of the bridesmaids dress from your sister’s wedding.

‘I’ve been looking for someone to shed some light

Not somebody just to get me through the night

I could use some direction

And I’m open to your suggestions’

The Christmas Gala was a disaster. The gala itself was wonderful, decorated to the nines, wonderful little hors d’oeuvres being passed around on trays that looked suspiciously like real silver. You however were a disaster. After entering the gala on Bruces arm, to the flash of what seemed like a million cameras, you’d been immediately pulled away to solve a crisis for the marketing assistants. The crisis turned out to be nothing more than a minor tear in her dress. One strategically placed safety pin later and you found yourself in the midst of the gala uncertain where Bruce had wandered off too.

“What’s a pretty girl like you doing standing alone?” Oliver Queen. You’d had several run ins with him whilst working for Bruce.

“Oliver, not that it’s any of your business but I’m looking for Bruce.” You didn’t even bother glancing at him, lest you encourage his flirtations. “You haven’t seen him recently, have you?”

“Does Brucie really have you working on Christmas? He truly has no shame. If you were working for me-“ You cut him off before he could descend into what was sure to be a thinly veiled innuendo.

“We’ve talked about this Oliver. I’m not interested in you, professionally or personally.” You levelled your iciest look at him.

“Sheesh, can’t even give a guy a shot in the spirit of Christmas?” You harden your glare. “Fine, fine. I can take a hint sometimes.” He raised his hands in surrender before placing them on your shoulders turning you in a full 180. “Your beloved Brucie is right there, and it seems he’s decided to use the spirit of the season to rekindle an old flame.” You were met with the sight of Bruce and Selina Kyle in an arch way locked in a kiss.

“Oh.” Logically you knew you had no right to be upset. Bruce had made it abundantly clear the two of you were just friends. But if that were true, why did this feel so much worse than any breakup you’d gone through in your near 25 years of life. “Excuse me, I need to- I should check- I…” You left Oliver standing there as you rushed from the ballroom.

‘All I wanna do is find a way back into love

I can’t make it through without a way back into love

And if I open my heart again

I guess I’m hoping you’ll be there for me in the end’

You wrote your two week notice on the train ride back to your apartment. You were sure you looked quite the sight, shivering in your evening dress, makeup running down your face from the tears you couldn’t hold back. It took an hour longer than normal to reach your corner of Gotham, it gave you time to compartmentalize. Due to the Holidays you’d only have to work out one week of your two weeks notice, but that was still one week of having to see the man who had unintentionally shattered your heart. The worst part is you couldn’t even be mad at him. He’d done nothing to lead you on or imply that you were anything more than friends. You’d simply allowed your imagination to get the better of you and now here you were crying because you’d broken your own heart. You were so lost in your own heartbreak you failed to notice the man standing outside your apartment building until you literally walked into him.

“I’m so sor-“ you began to tumble out an apology as you lifted your eyes to the face of the torso you’d just slammed into, only to be met with achingly familiar blue eyes. “Bruce?”

“You left.” He looked upset, almost as if he were the one heartbroken. “You didn’t even say goo- Have you been crying?” His hand lifts to your face, thumb trailing under your eye. You have to repress a shudder at the feeling of his warm hand on your cold cheek. “Was it Queen? Did he say something again? I’ll have him bared from the building.” You step out of Bruce’s embrace.

“No, it wasn’t Oliver Mr.Wayne.” Professionalism, detachment, that was the only way you were going to get through this final encounter with the man you’d come to love. “It was a personal matter and it’s been handled. But since you’re here I might as well do this face to face. I’m resigning from my position as your personal assistant effective immediately. I’ve already emailed HR and-“

“No.”

“No? This isn’t a yes or no, situation Mr. Wayne. I’m not asking your permission, I’m telling you. I quit.” You’re astonished at the level of strength in your own voice.

“No, you don’t. And while we’re at it you’ll stop with this Mr.Wayne nonsense and go back to calling me Bruce.” He’s agitated now, angry at you.

“Mr. Wayne once again it’s not up to you. I’ve already sent my notice to HR, and accepted a new position elsewhere.” A small lie, but a seemingly necessary one seeing how hard of a time Bruce seems to be having with grasping the concept of your departure from his life.

“Then I’ll buy this new company you work for.” He’s invaded your personal bubble once more.

“Mr. Wayne you can’t just buy a corporation to stop me from quitting.”

“Bruce, and yes I can. I’m a billionaire if you’ve forgotten.” You’re nearly chest to chest at this point. “If this personal matter is the reason you’re quitting, then let me help. I’m sure with your brains and my money we can figure out a solut-“

“I’m in love with you, you idiot.” You push at his chest, anger fuelling your every movement now. “I’m in love with you and I didn’t relish the thought of having to sit in that office day after day watching you moon over Seli-“ He’s kissing you. Bruce Wayne is kissing you. Your to stunned to do anything other than let him.

‘There are moments when I don’t know if it’s real

Or if anybody feels the way I feel

I need inspiration

Not just another negotiation’

When he’d finally pulled away, self satisfied look on his face, you began to berate him. It was his turn to be stunned into silence while you cursed him out in the middle of the street (unbeknownst to either of you, one of the teens from your apartment block filmed the whole thing. It went viral by morning and Wayne Enterprises PR team had to work overtime to spin it in the companies favour). It would take the better part of a week for him to convince you that what’d you seen was Selina’s last ditch attempt at winning him back. It’d taken him another two months of failed wooing attempts to finally get you to agree to be his girlfriend.

‘All I wanna do is find a way back into love

I can't make it through without a way back into love

And if I open my heart to you

I'm hoping you'll show me what to do

And if you help me to start again

You know that I'll be there for you in the end’

The song fades out and your left standing in the middle of your kitchen lost in thought when a gentle chuckle penetrates your subconscious. You whirl around to find Bruce leaned against the entryway, smile lighting up his face.

“How long have you been standing there?” You could feel a blush beginning to bloom across your cheeks.

“Does it matter?” He advances on you, wrapping his arms around your waist.

“Yes, I need to gauge how embarrassed I should be.” You sink into his embrace, wrapping your own arms around his neck. He bends down and plants a gentle kiss on your lips.

“What were you thinking so intently about?” He gently sweeps an errant strand of hair behind your ear. It was your turn to plant a distracting kiss on Bruce’s lips, the last thing you needed was to inflate his ego. “Ah, so you were thinking about me.” He smirks when you break for air.

“I was not.” Your blush deepens, as if thinking about your husband was the most scandalous thing in the world.

“Mom’s always thinking about you. It’s kinda gross actually.” Jason sat atop your counter eating a cinnamon bun. “What do you even see in the old man anyway? You’re young, attractive and funny. You could do a lot better than Bruce.”

“Off my counter.” You pulled out of Bruce’s embrace to admonish your son. “And put that down, those are for brunch.” You swat his hand away from the fruit tray. He hops off the counter planting a kiss to your check, as he grabs the fruit tray and starts carrying it to the table in the adjacent dinning room.

“It is brunch though mother.” You startle a bit at the sound of Damians voice coming from beside you, nearly 15 years in and you still got startled by the way they all seemed to move in utter silence popping up from seemingly nowhere. At 5’4” your youngest was nearly eye to eye with you, a few more years and he’d tower over you like his brothers.

“Did you all collectively wake up and decided today was the day to disregard all of mom’s rules?” You move to turn off the speaker, mourning your few hours of peace and beginning to mentally prep for the chaos of having all 7 of the Wayne children in one dinning room. “Tim you better be putting that coffee into a cup.” You had a sixth sense for Tim’s caffeine habit and, unbeknownst to him, had been taking steps to curb it. Your most recent ingenious plan was slowly mixing decaf into the regular coffee. Your current batch of grounds was 60% decaf and only 40% caffeinated.

“Of course mom. I wouldn’t dream of breaking your rules.”

“Bullshit.” You whisper under your breath. “Aren’t you all currently breaking rule number 3?” The boys had the decency to at least feigen sheepishness.

“But it is brunch.” Duke, Stephanie and Cas shuffle into the kitchen together.

“Technically the wording of the rule does state that we’re not supposed to enter the kitchen until after brunch, which is why I entered the dining room through the hallway.” Richard leaned his head through the entryway between the two rooms.

“We get it, your mom’s favourite little suck up.” Jason slaps the back of Richards head on his way back into the kitchen. He loads his arms with various platters from the counter before turning back to his siblings. “Well come on half-wits, if you’re gonna break mom’s rules might as well make ourselves useful.”

“Jason, don’t hit your brother.” Your admonishment is half hearted at best, knowing full well your second eldest was likely to simply pretend to listen, while waiting till you turned your back to strike his older brother once again. “And Richard don’t even think about retaliating while he’s holding those platters.” You lean against the back counter running a hand through your hair, releasing it from its haphazard bun. You watch the other kids with the eyes of a well seasoned mother, fear for your antique dish-ware seizing you. You really should just invest in plastic dish-ware at this point, or perhaps you can commission Lucius to develop a line of indestructible dish-ware. There has to be a market for that, right?

Bruce comes to stand beside you, placing a mug of tea in your hands. You lean your head against his shoulder, a content sigh leaving your lips.

“No regrets?” He asks, as the sound of a squabble erupt from the dinning room.

“Not a one.” You smile. No, you wouldn’t trade this for anything. CRASH Okay, maybe you’d trade out whichever child just broke- CRASH - TWO plates. “Boys what did I just say about fighting with my antiques in your hands!”

[kookygranger]

Fairytale of Hawkins: Part Two

Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

A cheesy hallmark Christmas fic inspired by @bettyfrommars's tow truck!Eddie and prompts #1 & #6 from Betty and @allthingsjoeq's Holiday Prompt Party

Summary: A petting zoo, Secret Santa and mistletoe never being around when you need it.

Warnings: reader doesn't have family, reader and Eddie are in their late 20s/early 30s, swearing

Word count: 5.3k

Author's note: Okay, it's 11:54pm on Christmas Eve where I am and this is far from perfect, but I wanted the people who enjoyed the first part to have this for Christmas so here it is. I hope you're all safe and you get moments of peace and joy these holidays.

Part One

You were handsome You were pretty, Queen of New York City When the band finished playing They howled out for more – Fairytale of New York, The Pogues/Kirsty MacColl

3 Days 'Til Christmas

“So uh, what’s goin’ on with you and Robin’s friend?”

Hawkins town centre is frosted with a light dusting of snow that fell in the early morning hours. Picture perfect, like a Hallmark Christmas card. The hum of festive cheer in the crowds doing last-minute gift shopping and partaking in the charming small-town seasonal activities is mostly drowned out by an argument between Dustin and Lucas, Max and the younger Sinclair sibling rolling their eyes in annoyance. They sit, impatiently waiting for the rest of the party to show up, on the edge of the fountain frozen over with the cold snap that swept through town at the beginning of the week.

Steve’s perched on the back of a bench a few feet away, ignoring the squabble as Eddie toes the ground in front of him.

“First of all, I know you know her name. And B, nothing is going on, she’s a great girl and a really good friend to Robin.” Steve shrugs, “We both told you you’d like her.”

Eddie squints, his leather jacket opening to reveal a dark red sweater as his pocketed hand gestures in question, “Why me specifically?”

Steve shrugs again, “Rob and I both thought you’d hit it off. It just feels…right. Don’t you think?”

“I mean yeah, yeah she’s beautiful. Cute as hell when she gets flustered. But she’s a city girl–used to more than this, right?” He looks around at the small-town square, filled with little kids dressed in matching sweaters and flustered mothers pushing prams with clenched smiles. “She’ll be gone well before the ice on the road thaws.”

“So? What’s wrong with having a little holiday fling?”

Eddie sucks his teeth, “I don’t think I can.”

Steve lets out a low whistle, “You’re that head-over-heels already?”

“No.” Eddie shakes his head, cheeks flushing pink from more than just the bite to the wind, then sighs. “Think if I have a fling I might just get there though. This is Robin’s fault she shouldn’t’ve talked her up so much!” Steve chuckles at his friend’s distress. “Doesn’t help that she looks like a damn angel when the snow’s kissing her eyelashes.”

Steve rubs his face, “Jesus Christ.”

***

You and Robin had vowed to hold off drinking for the rest of the holidays after your night at The Hideout, which was followed by a day spent on the couch, groaning about loud noises as Gremlins beamed across the TV in the darkened living room. When you’d finally managed to peel yourselves away from the nest you’d made out of blankets, large diet sodas and greasy fries from the drive-thru, you decided to cross off making Christmas cookies from Robin’s list of “holiday activities that could make the grinch’s heart grow.” She assured you weren’t the Grinch in this situation but it certainly felt, pointed.

The misshapen sugary treats weigh down your tote bag as you walk arm-in-arm with Robin towards the designated meeting spot.

“I keep making a fool of myself in front of Eddie.”

Robin smirks, “You’re doing fine.”

“I can just be so,” you hold out your hand in a vague gesture and grimace, “sometimes, you know?”

Robin laughs, “Oh, I know.”

“Thanks.”

She squeezes your arm that’s wrapped around hers and shakes her head, “Everybody loves you I promise. And if they don’t yet, they will.” You both round a corner, the fountain and a group of animated college kids coming into view. Steve waves from across the street, Eddie turning his head in your direction then away again quickly when you make eye contact.

“Right.”

***

“C’mon now everyone keep up.” Steve claps his gloved hands together, his cheeks pink and his brows furrowed in faux admonishment as he leads the group towards the petting zoo set up for the weekend in the parking lot of Bradley’s Big Buy supermarket. You can tell by the glisten in his eyes how much it means to him to have all of his found family in one place.

You laugh softly when he claps Dustin on the back and the younger boy tries to shrug off his embrace.

“He’s in his element this time of year.” Eddie falls into stride next to you, the both of you now bringing up the rear of the boisterous group.

You nod, a small smile permanently etched on your face from the company. “I can tell.” You walk the rest of the way in silence, watching the antics of the strange mix of personalities in front of you with a distant bemusement as you tried and failed to come up with something to say. Had you called him sexy at one point the other night or did you dream that?

The stench of hay and something less savoury wafts over you as you all enter the car park under a bright red banner with ‘Petting Zoo’ written in white cursive on it. You’re about to ask Eddie if they did this every year when a middle-aged woman stops you with a brochure held out in front of you.

“Have you found Jesus?” She’s standing by the entrance in a matching woollen navy-blue coat and skirt, heels on her stocking-clad feet and hair quaffed perfectly in a bob accentuated by the pearls on her ears and neck.

You don’t even think about your response before it slips out, “Oh, I’m so sorry, I didn’t realise he was missing.” You can see Eddie smirk out of the corner of your eye. It was just meant to be a light-hearted joke, but the woman clearly didn’t see the humour.

She purses her lips in a thin line and snatches the brochure back out of your reach. “I should’ve known you were one of his type.” You keep walking along, her voice changed back into a sweeter version as she asks the next person the same question behind you.

You turn to Eddie, his eyes downcast and shoulders higher than they were a second ago. “What type are you?”

He rubs the back of his neck underneath the black knitted scarf that matches his beanie. “Uh, devil worshipper according to this town.”

“Oh, I’m actually lapsed. Found all that sacrificing was getting in the way of my day job you know?”

The smile that catches at the corners of his mouth makes your tummy flip.

“I know whattya mean.” He nods, all dramatics with his feigned seriousness, “So much laundry with all those blood-stained clothes.”

“Right? Such a hassle.” You both laugh as you look at each other. “Do they actually think that?”

Eddie shrugs, “It was worse when I was in high school, but I still get the odd bit of holy water thrown in my direction.”

“Why?” You shake your head and frown, serious this time. “Just because you listen to Motorhead?”

“That and I was the leader of the Dungeons and Dragons club in high school. It’s a game for nerds really, but it kinda got swept up into the satanic panic that was going around at the time.”

“That’s so…dumb.”

He huffs a laugh through his nose, watching your feet walk in sync together. “Yeah, I guess it is.” His head snaps back up, “Wait, how do you know Motorhead?”

“Why wouldn’t I?” You bump his shoulder and scoff, “Did you just judge a book by her cover Eddie the devil worshipper?” He opens his mouth to speak but his reply is cut off by an animalistic snort that has your head turning in curiosity. You gasp as you spot the furry brown creatures leaning into patting hands over a wooden fence, “They actually do have reindeer here!”

Eddie grins as your face lights up. “Did you think they were lying?”

You shake your head, “I thought they’d just be regular deer. I’ve never seen–“ You grab Eddie’s leather-clad arm in your excitement and he looks down at your touch before you bound off towards Robin who’s laughing at your reaction.

El and Max have to coax you into actually patting one when you get closer, the antlers much more intimidating in person. They giggle as you squeal and pull back your hand when a cloud of condensation escapes from the deer’s nostrils as it huffs loudly.

You turn to laugh with them, distracted as the reindeer leans in closer, your body tensing when you feel its hot breath on the back of your neck before it snatches your scarf from around your shoulders. The girls yell as you whip around to see it trot off, barely processing what just happened when you feel a warm hand on your back, Eddie’s frame coming into view as he slips past you and jumps the fence. He’s able to grab the scarf out of the creature’s mouth and sneak back onto your side of the fence before anyone who works there even notices.

You’re speechless as he hands your scarf back to you, El and Max cheering along with Robin and Nancy who’d noticed the commotion.

The younger girls are giggling again when Max interrupts the silent look you and Eddie share while the scarf is held in between the both of you. “You’re a real knight in shining armour this week Munson.” He looks up at Max as she and El walk away, looking for their boyfriends to ask if they’d brave a reindeer pen for them.

“Thank you, Eddie.” You take the scarf from his hands, grimacing at the wet patch on the light fabric. “Don’t know if you can get reindeer drool out of cashmere though.”

He snorts, “Maybe you shouldn’t have worn something so expensive to a petting zoo, princess.”

You brush off the nickname, not entirely sure if it was meant in jest. “You know I’m a feminist, I’m gonna need you to stop coming to my rescue Eddie.”

He smirks, “I don’t think that’s feminism, I think that’s stubborn independence to the point of detriment.”

He was taunting. Flirting really, but Eddie forgets it takes time for people to figure out he’s not just being grumpy all the time. That he isn’t as mean as his initial wariness of people might suggest. For a second he forgets that you haven’t always been a part of this group – that you don’t know him like the others do.

The awestruck look that had graced your face drops. “Jeez okay, I didn’t realise we were reading each other.” His eyes go wide as you shrink into yourself. “You know, I realise you probably don’t like me very much and you might feel like I’m ruining your time with your friends at Christmas, but I am trying Eddie.”

He hates the way your eyes begin to water.

“Robins told me so much about all of you, I know how much you all mean to each other and I really didn’t want to intrude on that, but she insisted that it would be okay. She’s letting me spend the holidays with her family because I don’t have one, and I don’t want her to regret that.” You look down at your feet, “I’ll make sure to stay out of your way from now on.” 

Eddie clenches his eyes shut as you walk away to find Robin or anyone else who won’t mind you joining in.

“Nice work Munson.”

***

Once the group have had their share of reindeer petting and eaten the cookies you and Robin had brought along with some hot cocoa from a nearby stand, everyone gathers in the town square again for the annual Secret Santa. You’re huddled together with Robin, head leaning against hers as you steal each other’s warmth and the group gathers in a circle, Steve tossing pieces of paper with everyone’s name written on them into his beanie.

Eddie keeps stealing glances at you as Steve goes around the group, dramatically holding a gloved hand to each of the teens’ eyes and yelling, “No peeking!”

Eddie feels shit. He can’t believe he’s made you feel unwelcome. Well, he can. He knows he can be guarded when it comes to letting new people into his life, but you’re one of Robin’s best friends – spending Christmas with her because you don’t have anywhere else to go and he’s made you feel like he doesn’t want you here. Asshole.

When Steve gets round to you and Robin, he holds the hat out to her then moves on to Jonathan and Argyle next. You figure you’re too new to the group to partake in this tradition, which seems fair. Steve rounds out the wonky circle with Eddie, dropping the beanie with a “whoops” before fumbling on the ground with it, then holding it out to Eddie. You notice him squinting his eyes in suspicion, wondering what’s going on between them when Steve comes back to you.

“Lucky last,” he smiles that charming cherub grin of his and you reach into the beanie to pull the last piece of paper out.

Of course it would be.

Steve reminds everyone of the budget and secret part of Secret Santa with a pointed look at Mike, who frowns in offence before the group starts heading off in different directions.

Robin moves to stand in front of you. “Who’d ya get? Do you need help? I can bend the rules for you seeing as you don’t properly know everyone.”

“Yeah, I feel like I’m a bit disadvantaged.” You laugh nervously, “I uh, I got Eddie.”

“Oh great! He’s easy. Big nerd, you know what he likes.” She starts counting off on her fingers, “Music, DnD, Lord of the Rings and all that fantasy stuff.”

“Yeah, I guess.” You shrug.

She hooks her arm with yours again, “C’mon let’s go together, I got Nancy. I feel like you’ll be better at picking something for her than me.”

***

After an hour and a half, you’re about ready to give up. You helped pick out a faux-leather journal and fountain pen set for Nancy from Robin, but you haven’t been able to find anything remotely good for Eddie’s gift. Everything feels impersonal like something he could’ve just picked up himself and the last thing you want is for him to be disappointed that you got him for the gift exchange. Just another friend-only activity that your presence has ruined.

You’re currently browsing through a second-hand bookstore, hoping to find something you can curl up on the couch in your apartment with during the rest of the holidays, while Robin’s popped into the bath and body shop across the street to look for a gift for her aunt.

Your eyes scan the hardbacks in the fantasy section, fingers running lightly across the spines when they come to a stop on a light green book. You tilt the book from the shelf, admiring the mountains and dragon carved in navy blue adorning the border. This could be perfect. Carefully opening the worn cover, you find an inscription written in the yellowed pages that makes you smile. You close the book softly and head to the counter to ring it up. Maybe he wouldn’t be disappointed.

Dear Henry,

In celebration of our mutual liking – I hope Bilbo becomes a friend as well.

Happy Birthday,

Love, your Arwen

***

Christmas Eve

The butcher paper wrapped gift sat heavy in your palm as you’re greeted by Steve in his living room when you and Robin walk in. You hold up the present in question, keen to get rid of it before your clammy hands ruin the red satin bow decorating it, and Steve points you in the direction of the pile under the colourfully lit tree. You take a moment to admire the personal ornaments, the glint of a red 20-sided dice reminding you of the other inhabitant of this apartment.

The famous Harrington Christmas Eve party had been talked up by Robin for months. In her attempt to get you to Hawkins, she promised you a preview of the King Steve you’d heard her tease him so much about (which he vehemently denied was a thing), potently spiked punch (which you would not be partaking in) and impromptu games out on the street that would cause noise complaints from the neighbours.

And now that Steve and Eddie shared an apartment? Apparently, rowdiness was a prerequisite.

You’re more nervous than you should be as you settle in, taking solace in Jonathan and Will’s quiet company on the couch as you sip on a non-spiked mug of egg nog. It isn’t until half an hour later that Eddie even shows up, despite this being his apartment.

He walks into the living room, cheeks red from the cold, snow still sprinkled on his shoulders and in his hair. He’s followed closely by Dustin who’s rugged up in an assortment of knitwear that looks like it was definitely made by a doting family member, and grins when everyone greets him.

“Finally, you two.” Steve walks in from the kitchen with a bowl of freshly poured potato chips. “Everyone’s here, we’re getting ready for Secret Santa.”

Eddie just nods at him, offering you a tight-lipped smile when you catch his eye before he walks over to the tree to place something under it with his back turned to you.

While everyone gathers in the living room, he ducks out. Returning without all the extra layers, his crisp white t-shirt takes you by surprise and your eyes wander to the silver chain around his neck.

Pull it together, honestly.

“Okay, I’m first!” Robin walks across the room to the tree by the front window, only to be stopped by Steve’s arm.

“What? Why are you first?”

“Well, someone has to be dingus. Why not me?” 

“Uh, maybe we should let our guest be the first?” Everyone turns their head towards you and the attention makes you sink further into the couch.

“Oh, no Robin is always first.” You wink in her direction, then frown. “Wait, did that sound weird?” You look at Jonathan and Will who both chuckle, the older boy giving you a shrug.

After Robin tears through her present the decision is made to go anti-clockwise around the room. The closer it gets to Eddie who’s sitting on the couch opposite you, the more your palms begin to sweat. You don’t think your heart could take him being indifferent to his gift, and you hated that you cared so much about what he thought. What was this town doing to you?

When Steve hands Eddie his gift your back automatically straightens, perched perilously on the edge of your seat you grip the mug of egg nog in your hands. He takes his time with unwrapping, not diving straight in and tearing like you would’ve expected, even draping the ribbon around his neck once he’s untied it. When he gets to the gift the room is mostly silent, save for the Christmas carols playing from the stereo in the corner. You’d already clocked The Kinks, The Damned and Ramones – sure that the boy who held your last ditch gesture in his hands had picked the tunes.

Eddie’s face is stoic as his fingers run along the cover of the book. When Dustin and Mike, sat near him spot what it is they share exclamations of “Sick”, but you’re more interested in the metalhead’s opinion. You take in a deep breath as he opens the well-preserved cover and you watch his eyes read the inscriptions.

After much back and forth you’d decided to leave your own message next to the original one. Writing in pencil in case he wanted to erase it.

He rubs his freshly shaven jaw then his eyes find yours across the room. They’re soft. Pools of awe that match the tone of his quiet voice.

“Thank you.”

You offer him a small smile, “You’re welcome.”

“How did you know it was from her?” Dustin pipes up from his seat on the floor.

“Lucky guess.” His eyes hadn’t left yours until then, and you watch him scan the message again.

Dear Eddie,

I know you’re already well acquainted but I thought what better company on a long winter’s night than the second best party to go on adventures with (second only to your own of course).

Merry Christmas,

C.G.

xx

You feel his eyes on you as the rest of the gift-giving takes place around you. Wiping the sweat off your palms now that the moment was over, but the tension you’d felt hadn’t lifted from your chest – only tethered itself to the cause that was sitting across the room lightly brushing his thumb over your offering.

You’re the last in line to open your Secret Santa, but the attention of the room has been caught up in the gifts that have already been revealed. You’re admiring the new camera bag Jonathan is turning over in his hands when Steve taps you on the shoulder. He holds out a small parcel that fits in the palm of his hand and winks at you when you take it, before walking over to sit by Dustin.

You look down at the parcel wrapped in shiny red paper, tugging at the twine tied around it when you feel the weight of the couch shift beside you.

Eddie takes up more room than Jonathan who’s now sitting on the arm of the sofa across from you with Nancy’s arm draped over his leg. He’s manspreading a little, but the only reason you notice is because of the close proximity of his knee to yours.

“You got me,” he gestures to the gift in your hands, “I mean I got you. Well, I guess both are true.” He holds up his new copy of The Hobbit and smiles softly.

You look down at your lap again and begin to unwrap your present, Eddie’s leg bouncing next to yours. A glint catches your eye as a pair of dangly ruby earrings is revealed.

“They’re not real obviously,” Eddie scratches his jaw, “and Robin said you’d be happy with anything, like a snow globe or candy but I saw these in the drugstore and thought they’d look good on you.”

You smile, “Eddie they’re really pretty. Thank you so much.”

He blows out a puff of air, “You like them?”

“I love them, honestly. Oh, look we match!” You hold out the earrings next to the ring on his finger sporting a small ruby stone.

His cheeks are dusted in pink as he smiles, “Yeah, I guess we do.” You ask him to hold the earrings you had in before as you swap them. “You don’t have to put them on now.”

“I know, I want to.”

His tongue darts out to wet his bottom lip, mesmerised as he watches you put on his earrings. “What does C.G. mean by the way?” He opens the book in his lap again.

“City girl.” The frown on his face troubles you momentarily before he speaks again, doe eyes pining you down once more.

“Thank you. It’s really special. You’re really–“ He trails off, eyes searching yours as you wait for him to finish his sentence. But he doesn’t. Instead, he gets up so abruptly that you flinch. “I gotta uh, find something…I’ll be back.”

You turn to Will who had been not so subtly watching the whole exchange from the other side of the couch and gives you a sympathetic smile when you say, “I still don’t know where I stand with him.”

***

For the next twenty minutes, you only see glimpses of Eddie as he darts in and out of rooms. Stomping around like he’s on a mission, a crease etched deeply in his brow. While Nancy and El are admiring your earrings in the kitchen, you hear a squeak of shoes on the linoleum before you see a blur of brown hair disappear around the corner.

You excuse yourself, finding Eddie alone in the hallway, leaning up against the wall with his arms crossed and head tilted to the ceiling.

“Eddie, are you okay?” He shakes his head and huffs out a bitter laugh. “What’s wrong?”

“There’s always goddamn mistletoe at these things. Steve always gets drunk and tortures people with it, but then this year? Of course there’s none!”

You step closer, now standing in front of him but he doesn’t meet your eye. You’re confused. “Why do you need mistletoe?”

“So I have an excuse to kiss you.”

Oh.

OH.

Wait, what?

“Why don’t you just…kiss me?”

His head snaps down, eyes flickering back and forth between yours with a frown. “Can I?”

You bite your lip to stop the enormous smile threatening to creep onto your face. “Yes Eddie, you can kiss me.”

He pushes himself off the wall, crowding your space and reaching a hand out tentatively to touch your face, thumb gently stroking your skin like he had the book. He searches your eyes for any hesitation before he leans in slowly until your fluttering lashes tickle his cheek and he can’t take it anymore. The kiss is as soft as the snow falling in flurries outside, one elongated peck before you're both leaning in for another, and another. Turning tender as he reaches his other hand to pull you closer by the waist. You can taste peppermint on him, probably from one of the candy canes hanging on the tree, but it’s the warmth from his chest and the heady scent of his cologne and smoke that clings to his shirt that has you lost in him. So lost that when his thumb gently pulls down on the side of your mouth, you let him in with no hesitation, his tongue now spreading his warmth from the inside.

“Wow, that got R-rated really quick.” You jump and lean back, not moving far with Eddie’s grip still on your waist. You look down the hall and catch Robin nodding with a look of slight disgust on her face next to a smirking Steve standing there with his arms crossed.

Eddie bows his head and sighs, “Really? Think you can maybe take the commentary somewhere else Harrington?”

He holds up his hands in defence, a leafy twig with white berries hanging from his hand. “Hey, I was just coming to give you two a push, but it looks like the party’s already started.”

Eddie pinches the skin in between his brows, “For fuck sake.” You cover your mouth with your hand at the sight of the deep blush creeping into his cheeks, which deepens even further when you both hear Dustin yell from the other room.

“Did he kiss her yet?!”

Eddie groans and moves his hand to the small of your back to guide you out the door, flipping off the audience at the end of the hall before grabbing your coats off the hanger. He helps you into yours and leads you outside the apartment building by your hand.

For the first time since you arrived in Hawkins, you don’t notice the cold that greets you, focused entirely on Eddie’s warmth as he crowds you against the brick wall of the building. He holds one arm above you, almost enveloping you in his soft waves when he leans in.

That intense gaze has you shying away again, opting to play with the zipper of his jacket instead of looking back.

“You really liked your gift that much huh?”

“I really like you.” He tilts your chin up.

“I didn’t think–“

“I’m sorry if I made you feel unwelcome,” he frowns. “I have trouble letting people in.”

You shake your head and he moves his hand to stroke along your jaw. “It’s okay, this is a very special family I’ve walked into. I understand why you’d be wary of anyone disturbing that.”

“You fit right in. I promise.”

“Thank you, Eddie.”

He smirks, “Also, I’m just really, really bad at flirting when it comes to drop-dead gorgeous city girls.”

You grin, “I think you’re probably better at it than you think.”

He leans in, lips a breath away from yours, “Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

***

Christmas Day

The screen door shudders under your touch as you knock on the trailer, your gloved hand coming back to wrap around the translucent cake plate tucked into your chest. You hear muffled footsteps before the inside door swings open to reveal a beaming Eddie on the other side.

“Hi,” you smile.

You step back to let him open the screen door and he meets you with half a step out, grabbing the plate from you before placing a gentle kiss on your lips that has you desperate for more.

“Hi, sweet girl. C’mon in.”

You follow his warmth, “There’s only half left of the cheesecake. I’m sorry Robin and her family already ate most of it, then I kind of hid it when I realised I didn’t have anything to bring over – I think it tastes pretty good though. And I brought this wine, which is all they had left at the store and it only came in this gigantic bulk size, I think it might be half water–”

You feel Eddie’s smile as he presses his lips to yours again, “It’s okay sweetheart. You didn’t have to bring anything.” “I know, but I wanted to make a good first impression and we both know that I…don’t.”

He chuckles, “Trust me, I was blown away as soon as you stepped outta that car.”

You roll your eyes, snappy reply dying on your tongue when you hear a door open and an older man walks down the short hallway towards you. “Hi, Mr Munson.” Eddie squeezes your shoulder as you step forward with your hand held out and introduce yourself. “Thank you so much for having me, I hope I’m not intruding on your Christmas.”

“Nonsense,” he frowns at you, the resemblance uncanny, and brings you in for a tight hug. “Please call me Wayne, darlin’. Honestly, Ed’s been bouncing off the walls waiting for you to come so you might be able to do me a favour and get him to sit still.”

“We were just watching Gremlins.”

“Oh, I love that film! I didn’t get to appreciate it the other day because I was hungover–I mean…we were busy baking cookies.” You feel Eddie’s chuckle on the side of your face.

“She brought baked goods and wine, Wayne. All for lil’ old us.” He squeezes your shoulder again.

“It’s not any good.” You hold out the cheap bottle to Eddie’s uncle.

“Oh hell, anything you can uncork, uncap or unscrew, I’ll drink it.”

You laugh, shoulders relaxing under Eddie’s subtle massage.

***

You feel light.

Floaty and fuzzy with the laughter coming from beside you, your body sinking into the worn couch and Eddie’s gentle stroking of the back of your hand grounding you in the moment. The Munson’s, like almost everybody else in Hawkins had welcomed you into their home with open arms.

It was Christmas and you were curled up on the couch with a boy who meant something to you. Allowed to be a part of a family if only for a short period.

“So little miss, you headin’ home tomorrow?” You turn to Wayne, who’s sitting in his armchair, eating a piece of the cheesecake you plated up for him with Eddie’s help.

“I was planning on it, but you know the airport gets so busy during the holidays and Robin’s still gonna be here so…I think I might just stay till New Year, actually.”

Eddie’s head snaps from the TV set towards you. He grips your hand a little tighter to get your attention.

“Is that right?”

You turn to him, “Yeah. Are you–are you gonna be around?”

“No,” he shakes his head, frowning in that way that’s starting to make your heart flutter, “I gotta work. Lotta damsels in distress needin’ me to rescue them from the side of the road.” You feel the heat creep up your neck as Wayne rolls his eyes at his nephew.

“Wanna ride shotgun?”

~ THE END ~

Tagging: @eddieslooneymoonie, @micheledawn1975 – thank you for asking!

[lizpaige]

ronan dreams up some horses and adam’s more skittish around them then they are with him so ronan’s like 🙄 “time to face your fears parrish” and just forces him up onto one of them to ride. and its like embarrassing and silly cause he’s walking the horse around with adam on the saddle like they’re at a kids petting zoo or something, but adam ends up relaxing eventually and they go on rides together thru the summer.

[send-up-my-heart-to-you]

heres a change from my usual depressing posts: here are a few of my happy memories :)

when i was nine years old my grandma and my mom picked up me and my siblings from school. i was so happy bc its usually just our nannies who picked us up. we went straight to the mall together and played games, and then when my siblings got tired they went home but i stayed with my grandma and mom. we just walked around the mall shopping for clothes and i was happy bc i had my grandma and mom all to myself

when i was nine years old i moved schools. on a national holiday, i visited my old school to say hi to my old friends. the moment i stepped into the classroom i was swarmed with a flurry of hugs and tears. thats the last time i remember truly feeling like i had friends

when i was thirteen years old i hated how i looked. my mom would buy clothes for me and i’d hate them because they werent my style and werent really flattering. one day we went shopping and i bought myself this turtleneck and pair of jeans. i wore it and looked into the mirror and grinned so hard to myself because it was the first time i realized i was pretty

when i was twelve years old on new years eve (dec 30), i woke up to my cousins yelling at me to get up. i very groggily got up and got dressed. their mother took us to the zoo together and it was so fun. we were all happy. it was one of the last times we were all together and smiling

when i was eleven years old my mom took me to parents evening. my favorite teacher called me a gem and said my english grades are better than that of most native english speakers. i’ll never forget that. (me n her used to talk about percy jackson and shadowhunters together after i first picked them up)

when i was fifteen i was dressed up for a school event. when we walked outside i covered my face with my hijab. the girl next to me looked at me confused and i explained to her that i didnt want the guys to see me wearing makeup for religious reasons. she just nodded understandingly and said matter-of-factly “you dont need makeup to get stared at.” and when i laughed and said no one ever stares at me, she just looked at me very evenly and said “you wanna know something? i catch myself staring at you a lot. makeup or no makeup.”

around that time when i was fifteen, on a random tuesday at school i realized i actually have friends. i’m actually popular. i dont get bullied anymore. i’m not the “weird kid” sitting in the back of the classroom anymore.

when i was sixteen (this was back in april) me and my sister @txna-blxckthorn stopped by a fast food place at a gas station to grab dinner for our family. we were wearing pajamas under our hoodies. we were just talking about deep stuff while rain beat the windows and the smell of hot food wafted thru the air

[apoemaday]

The Lion for Real

by Allen Ginsberg

“Soyez muette pour moi, Idole contemplative…”

I came home and found a lion in my living room Rushed out on the fire escape screaming Lion! Lion! Two stenographers pulled their brunnette hair and banged the window shut I hurried home to Patterson and stayed two days

Called up old Reichian analyst who’d kicked me out of therapy for smoking marijuana ‘It’s happened’ I panted ‘There’s a Lion in my living room’ 'I’m afraid any discussion would have no value’ he hung up

I went to my old boyfriend we got drunk with his girlfriend I kissed him and announced I had a lion with a mad gleam in my eye We wound up fighting on the floor I bit his eyebrow he kicked me out I ended up masturbating in his jeep parked in the street moaning 'Lion.’

Found Joey my novelist friend and roared at him 'Lion!’ He looked at me interested and read me his spontaneous ignu high poetries I listened for lions all I heard was Elephant Tiglon Hippogriff Unicorn Ants But figured he really understood me when we made it in Ignaz Wisdom’s bathroom.

But next day he sent me a leaf from his Smoky Mountain retreat 'I love you little Bo-Bo with your delicate golden lions But there being no Self and No Bars therefore the Zoo of your dear Father hath no lion You said your mother was mad don’t expect me to produce the Monster for your Bridegroom.’

Confused dazed and exalted bethought me of real lion starved in his stink in Harlem Opened the door the room was filled with the bomb blast of his anger He roaring hungrily at the plaster walls but nobody could hear outside thru the window My eye caught the edge of the red neighbor apartment building standing in deafening stillness We gazed at each other his implacable yellow eye in the red halo of fur Waxed rhuemy on my own but he stopped roaring and bared a fang greeting. I turned my back and cooked broccoli for supper on an iron gas stove boilt water and took a hot bath in the old tup under the sink board.

He didn’t eat me, tho I regretted him starving in my presence. Next week he wasted away a sick rug full of bones wheaten hair falling out enraged and reddening eye as he lay aching huge hairy head on his paws by the egg-crate bookcase filled up with thin volumes of Plato, & Buddha.

Sat by his side every night averting my eyes from his hungry motheaten face stopped eating myself he got weaker and roared at night while I had nightmares Eaten by lion in bookstore on Cosmic Campus, a lion myself starved by Professor Kandisky, dying in a lion’s flophouse circus, I woke up mornings the lion still added dying on the floor–'Terrible Presence!’ I cried 'Eat me or die!’

It got up that afternoon–walked to the door with its paw on the south wall to steady its trembling body Let out a soul-rending creak from the bottomless roof of his mouth thundering from my floor to heaven heavier than a volcano at night in Mexico Pushed the door open and said in a gravelly voice “Not this time Baby--but I will be back again.”

Lion that eats my mind now for a decade knowing only your hunger Not the bliss of your satisfaction O roar of the universe how am I chosen In this life I have heard your promise I am ready to die I have served Your starved and ancient Presence O Lord I wait in my room at your Mercy.

[livepoultryfreshkilled]

i'm well aware this is divorced from the original purpose of zombies but as they exist in modern pop culture and general knowledge i'd like to talk about my personal, emotional experience with them. the idea that is. never met a zombie in real life that i know of

okay so i do not like the walking dead, zombieland, apocalyptic horror (just taste based, not my thing, more anxiety/despair inducing than scary) but flicks like night of the living dead, RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD (!!), general concepts of zombies always terrify and enthrall me. the things that have always terrified me abt zombies have been

the degredation of your own humanity and loss of control over ur body and

the kind of suffocating inevitability of the real monster being the virus, because you can kill a zombie but you cant really kill a virus.

this of course has been obviously effected by the current pandemic, which has shown me how inescapable the need for human spaces and contact is, and how many people can be capable of infecting you at once. like just hordes of other human beings. werewolves are wolves and vampires are vampires but zombies are (often) dead people without the capacity for reason. just the loss of yourself not thru death but thru zombification and the lack of humanity in the enemy. there is only so much you can do to keep from being sick, and i fear and dread societal collapse in media, i hate loss i hate it when people don't have their things and i hate when they can't be with each other. as a child i developed a mild agoraphobia until i reasoned that zombies can't climb stairs so any elevated location is safe because people are all over this planet. theyre everywhere! zoo wee mama!

when i say scared i mean my kind of primal childhood fear reactions, because i had a really very bad fear of zombies when i was a smalltime. in terms of now, my conscious view of them, yall know i love izombie and i love in the flesh too, when it comes to classic monsters i pick zombies over vampires and werewolves. this is because i

always feel the need to pay attention to whatever or whoever is getting the least attention. it makes me sad that nobody wants to be a zombie because what if zombies saw that wouldnt they be sad. they dont have any powers they're the underdog here and that's my archetype

generally develop fixations on or fetishes for the things that scare me the most. i feel like me and zombies have been through a lot, they're the monster i grew up thinking about because i was scared of them, and there's this belief i have that monsters won't hurt you if you're kind to them instead of afraid, so it's sort of a coping thing i suppose

i think decay rot and disease and grossness and corruption of the flesh and dead bodies are sick + awesome + cool. totally rules. i LOVE the idea of conscious zombies because to experience the degredation and destruction of your body, but not through pain (werewolves) and to experience your own death but not in the sense of living beyond death alone, stretching into immortality (vampires) but like, being a corpse watching those around you treat you like one but feeling and thinking everything a human does is crazy. eating brains is crazy, thats thoughts, you cant feed on someone you love like a vampire that is permanently destructive and repulsive and messy. awesome

and so ends my catechism (i am going to keep talking about this)

[a-moment-captured]

I survived my first camping trip with Coit! Went camping over night with our Cub Scouts at the NC Zoo! Anyone who knows anything about me knows that camping is not on my list of things to do. I mean @heavyhitterheaux was shocked I was going! I was shocked too!

Had a so much fun and we are going camping next weekend but that will be closer to home thankfully and hopefully not as windy and chilly! Being able to walk thru one of the largest zoos in North America without anyone there is a crazy experience! All the animals are out and relaxing after being yelled at all day.

The best part was Coit’s smile afterwards! That’s all that matters! I do so many things I’d never do unless Coit wanted to!

But….

@harlowsbby @heavyhitterheaux @labella420 @babiefries @neon-lights-and-glitter @nattinatalia

If I say I’m going camping, make sure I’ve grabbed a pillow! I was struggling last night on that air mattress! I grabbed Coit’s but not mine! 😩😩😩

[apsychicandapoet]

Boos & Brews Night (Wildlife Safari)

Saturday night Terry and I ventured to the annual Boos and Brews night at Wildlife Safari in Winston, Oregon. It turned out to be a pricey evening, but we did have fun as we always do when together. The Wildlife Safari staff typically decorate with lights around the village, and put up the appropriate decorations around the viewing pens of those animals inside the village and not on the drive thru. They had created a nice ambiance for the Halloween holiday arriving soon. 

As you walk in, there are smaller creatures in a pen set off in the back portion of the village. The animals in this area are especially for children to see, pet, and enjoy. The enclosure next to the petting zoo houses owls, snakes, tamarins, and different species of birds. Tonight everything along the path was lit in an array of rainbow colors, each covering the trunk of a tree or framing a skeleton in a tree or sitting on a bench. 

I petted a small donkey, a miniature horse and a goat or two, then we moved on toward the middle section to capture pictures of Halloween decor. Cobwebs, witches hats, candles, and black cats were hung from trees and pressed into the dark recesses of a tree trunk. The lights added an ambiance of the upcoming holiday. 

The dance floor under the dome on the opposite of the village was filled with lights, loud music, and people who appear to be having the most fun. As we walked closer, I could tell why they looked happier. There were four tables with different types of beer and wine for sale. A large dance floor was at the ready. Terry and I perused the beer tables. He chose his favorite and asked for one. 

We headed out in search of other events happening around the park. Turning on my flashlight app on my phone was a must! The path was dark which added to the eerie feeling. Off in the distance, you could hear the roars and growls of the lions in their fenced area. The sound of the snarling and roaring of the amazingly large kitties made your skin crawl. It was quite frightening to hear them so close, yet you knew they were behind fences. Or at least you hoped. 

Terry and I ventured off to the cougar enclosure, where we saw a group of folks watching something inside the pen. One of the employees had a large flashlight and was shining it into the setting. The beautiful cat came into view. It was tough snapping the right shot of the cougar, since it was so dark in this corner of the park, even with the light provided by the staff. Terry and I were making attempts at getting a good shot, but to no avail. Finally Terry yelled, "Walk toward the light," which threw me into a fit of laughter. 

Now kitties do what they want to do. This pertains to the larger cat family as well. Staff members said the cougar's name was Rogue. He got the name because of the area in which he was found. Roaming around the Rogue River area, he was brought to the safari to be cared for and protected. Rogue was throwing something up in the air, tossing it, turning it over and over in the grass, then placing it in his paws, rolling on his back and kicking it as he brought his hind feet up to meet his front paws. The staff member moved the flashlight over a bit and it dawned on me the "thing" he was throwing around was a rabbit.

We watched the cat play around with his rabbit for a while, making feeble attempts to snag that one picture or video that would allow us to place it on the blog. Terry finally achieved as good of a video as we could get, using what little light was available and his Samsung Galaxy 22 camera.  

All in all, I would say the trip to the Wildlife Safari Boos and Brews went pretty well. The music was great. The DJ was playing popular sounds such as, "Hit Me With Your Best Shot," and "Uptown Funk," and we can't forget the classic, "Thriller". The group of folks there at the time were smaller in number to keep it simple, fun, and less crowded. All in all, visitors were being quite friendly and pleasant to each other. Another good adventure, great memory, and my favorite way to spend time, another great time was had with Terry as company. 

[brookstonalmanac]

Holidays 5.17

Holidays

Bugloss Day (French Republic)

Children’s Day (Norway)

Constitution Day (Nauru)

Dia das Letras Galegas (Spain)

DIPG Awareness Day

Discovery Day (Cayman Islands)

Dogbert Day (Dilbert)

Dressed to the Nines Day

Falling Off a Log Night

Famine Memorial Day (Ireland)

Firefighters’ Day (Latvia)

Galacian Literature Day (Spain)

International Art of Giving Day

International Child Helpline Day

International Day Against Homophobia, Transphobia and Biphobia

International Internet Day

International Twm Sion Cati Day (UK)

King Arthur Day

Liberation Day (Democratic Republic of the Congo)

Merry-Go-Round Day [also 7.25]

Minecraft Day

National Book Day (Indonesia)

National Curves Day (Illinois)

National Cyber Safety Awareness Day

National Day Against Homophobia (Canada)

National Donkey Welfare Day (Kenya)

National Emo Day for Women

National Famine Memorial Day (Ireland)

National Graduation Day

National Graduation Tassel Day

National Idaho Day

National Linda Day

National Numeracy Day (UK)

National Pinkfix Day

National Real Estate Day

National VA2K Walk & Roll Day

National Work From Home Day (UK)

Navy Day (Argentina)

Pack Rat Day

Peasant Day (a.k.a. Agrarian Reform; Cuba)

Pink Shirt Day (New Zealand)

Railroad Day

Raja Day (Perlis, Malaysia)

Royal Ploughing Ceremony (Thailand)

Rubber Band Day

Slottsplassen (Norway)

Spinal Cord Injury Awareness Day (UK)

Supermodel Day

Tell An Umpire "I Love Your Outfit" Day

Uff Da Day (North Dakota)

Walk Safely to School Day (Australia)

Watch A Baby Fall Asleep Day

Wear Your Life Jacket to Work Day

World Horticulture Day

World Hypertension Day

World Information Society Day (UN)

World Necrotizing Enterocolitis Awareness Day

World Neurofibromatosis Awareness Day

World Orienteering Day

World Recycling Day

World Stationary Day

World Telecommunication Day (UN)

Food & Drink Celebrations

National Cherry Cobbler Day

National Mushroom Hunting Day

National Walnut Day

Pinot Grigio Day

Independence & Related Days

Constitution Day (Nauru)

Constitution Day (a.k.a. Seventeenth of May or Syttende Mai; Norway; 1814)

Kappan Empire (a.k.a. Holy Empire of the Kappa; Declared; 2022) [unrecognized]

Syttende Mai (Constitution Day; Norway; from Denmark, 1814)

3rd Friday in May

Arbour Day (Prince Edward Island, Canada) [3rd Friday]

Asakusa Sanja Matsuri begins (Geisha parade) [3rd Friday]

Ascension Friday (Belgium) [Friday closest to Ascension]

Bike-to-Work Day (US) [3rd Friday]

Endangered Species Day [3rd Friday]

Flashback Friday [Every Friday]

Fountain Pen Friday [3rd Friday]

Fry Day (Pastafarian; Fritism) [Every Friday]

International Virtual Assistants’ Day [3rd Friday]

NASCAR Day [3rd Friday]

National Bike to Work Day [3rd Friday]

National Defense Transportation Day [3rd Friday]

National Pizza Party Day [3rd Friday]

National Wear Blue Day [3rd Friday]

Native Nonprofit Day [3rd Friday]

O. Henry Pun Off Day [3rd Friday]

Teacher’s Day (Florida) [3rd Friday]

Wear Red for VEDS Day [3rd Friday]

World Meditation Day (UK) [3rd Friday]

Weekly Holidays beginning May 17 (2nd Full Week)

Mike, the Headless Chicken Weekend [3rd Friday & Saturday]

Festivals Beginning May 17, 2024

Aalborg Carnival (Aalborg, Denmark) [thru 5.25]

Anderson Valley Pinot Festival (Anderson Valley, California) [thru 5.19]

Arizona Restaurant Week: Spring (Statewide, Arizona) [thru 5.26]

Bath Festival (Bath, England) [thru 5.20]

Bayou Bon Vivant Cajun Music, Food & Art Celebration (Norfolk, Virginia) [thru 5.19]

Beaufort Music Festival (Beaufort, South Carolina) [thru 5.18]

Chocolate Fest (Long Grove, Illinois) [thru 5.19]

Crawfish Festival (Fountain Valley, California) [thru 5.19]

Fort Worth Zoo Annual Beastro (Fort Worth, Texas)

Georgia Mountain Fire & Smoke Cooking Festival (Hiawassee, Georgia) [thru 5.18]

Hangout Music Festival (Gulf Shores, Alabama) [thru 5.19]

Hermann Maifest (Hermann, Missouri) [thru 5.19]

Karneval der Kulturen (Berlin, Germany( [thru 5.20]

Magnolia Blossom Festival & World Championship Steak Cook-Off (Magnolia, Arkansas) [thru 5.18]

Manchester Jazz Festival (Manchester, United Kingdom) [thru 5.26]

Moers Festival (Moers, Germany) [thru 5.20]

Morel Mushroom Festival (Muscoda, Wisconsin) [thru 5.18]

Motor City Comic Con (Novi, Michigan) [thru 5.19]

New Jersey Seafood Festival (Belmar, New Jersey) [thru 5.19]

North Carolina Potato Festival (Elizabeth City, North Carolina) [thru 5.19]

OC Greek Food Festival (Anaheim, California) [thru 5.19]

Oregon Homebrew Festival (Corvallis, Oregon) [thru 5.18]

Palm Beach Ribs, Wings & Rock Festival (Palm Beach, Florida) [thru 5.19]

Picklefest (Atkins, Arkansas) [thru 5.18]

Preston Trout Days (Preston, Minnesota) [thru 5.19]

Rhubarb Festival (Intercourse, Pennsylvania) [thru 5.18]

Stockton Flavor Fest (Stockton, California) [thru 5.19]

Taste of Maplewood Street Festival (Maplewood, Missouri) [thru 5.18]

Temecula Valley Balloon & Wine Festival (Temecula, California) [thru 5.19]

Wave-Gotik-Treffen (Leipzig, Germany) [thru 5.20]

The WhiskyX (Brooklyn, New York)

World Expo of Beer (Frankenmuth, Michigan) [thru 5.18]

Feast Days

A.J. Casson (Artology)

Antonius (Positivist; Saint)

Bruno of Wurzburg (Christian; Saint)

Cathan (Christian; Saint)

Dave Sim (Artology)

Dea Dia (Goddess of the Cosmos; Ancient Rome)

Eugene (Muppetism)

Falling Off a Log Night (Shamanism)

Feast of ‘Azamat (Baha'i)

Gio Nicola Buhagiar (Artology)

Giulia Salzano (Christian; Saint)

Karl Burman (Artology)

Laval Homeboy Day (Church of the SubGenius; Saint)

Let Your Star Shine Day (Starza Pagan Book of Days)

Maden of Brittany (Christian; Saint)

Madron (a.k.a. Madern (Christian; Saint)

Maxime Emile Louis Maufra (Artology)

Mifune Matsuri (Boat Festival; Japan)

Neo-Pagan Fertility Ritual (Philippines; Everyday Wicca)

Ogham (Celtic Book of Days)

Paschal Baylon (Christian; Saint)

Restituta (Christian; Saint)

Silave (Christian; Saint)

Single Malt Whisky Day (Pastafarian)

Sjofn’s Blot (Pagan)

William Hobart Hare (Episcopal Church (USA))

Lucky & Unlucky Days

Prime Number Day: 137 [33 of 72]

Sensho (先勝 Japan) [Good luck in the morning, bad luck in the afternoon.]

Tycho Brahe Unlucky Day (Scandinavia) [23 of 37]

Unfortunate Day (Pagan) [25 of 57]

Un Giorno Nero (A Black Day; Italy) [Friday the 17th] (1 of 1 for 2024)

Premieres

About a Boy (Film; 2002)

All Men Are Mortal, by Simone de Beauvoir (Novel; 1946)

At Dawn We Spley, by Gordon W. Prange (Historical Novel; 1982)

Babel-17, by Samuel R. Delany (Novel; 1966)

Bad Blood, by Taylor Swift (Album; 2015)

Blurryface, by Twenty One Pilots (Album; 2015)

Bon Voyage! (Film; 1962)

Catch-22 (TV Mini-Series; 2019)

Cinderella Goes to a Party (Color Rhapsody Cartoon; 1942)

Comic Cuts, by Alfred Harmsworth (UK Comic; 1890) [1st regular comic published]

Don’t Look Back (Documentary Film; 1967)

Five Puppets (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1935)

Gentle On My Mind, recorded by Glen Campbell (Song; 1967)

Godspell (Off-Broadway Musical; 1971)

Grin and Share It, featuring Droopy (MGM Cartoon; 1957)

Groove Me, recorded by King Floyd (Song; 1970)

The Guns of Avalon, by Roger Zelazny (Novel; 1972) [chronicles of Amber #2]

History of Modern Art, by H. Harvard Arnason (Art History; 1968)

Hobo Bobo (WB MM Cartoon; 1947)

If (Animated Film; 2024)

The Importance of Being Earnest (Film; 2002)

In a Lonely Place (Film; 1950)

Information Please (Radio Quiz Show; 1938)

The Inimitable Jeeves, by P.G. Wodehouse (Novel; 1923)

John Wick: Chapter 3 — Parabellum (Film; 2019)

King Porter Stomp, recorded by Teddy Hill, featuring Dizzy Gillespie (Song; 1937)

La Planète des Singes (The Planet of the Apes), by Pierre Boulle (Novel; 1963)

Le Quiet Squad (The Inspector Cartoon; 1967)

The Love Boat (TV Series; 1976)

Mesmerize, by System of a Down (Album; 2005)

Mr. Big Stuff, recorded by Jean Knight (Song; 1970)

My Mortal Enemy, by Willa Cather (Novel; 1926)

The Omnivore’s Dilemma, by Michael Pollan (Book; 2006)

Pink of the Litter (Pink Panther Cartoon; 1967)

Puss in Boots (Ub Iwerks Cartoon; 1934)

Random Access Memories, by Daft Punk (Album; 2013)

A River Runs Through It, by Norman Maclean (Novella’ 1976)

The Rookie Bear (MGM Cartoon; 1941)

See You Yesterday (Film; 2019)

Shéhérazade, by Maurice Ravel (Song Cycle; 1904)

Shutter Bug (Woody Woodpecker Cartoon; 1963)

Stay (I Missed You), by Lisa Loeb (Song; 1994)

The Sultan’s Cat, featuring Farmer Al Falfa (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1931)

Swiss Ski Yodelers (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1940)

Thank God It’s Friday (Film; 1978)

The Tree of Life (Film; 2011)

Tommy, by The Who (Album; 1969)

Uthal, by Étienne-Nicolas Méhul (Opera; 1806)

Wacky-Bye Baby (Woody Woodpecker Cartoon; 1948)

What About Bob? (Film; 1991)

The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, by L. Frank Baum (Novel; 1900)

Today’s Name Days

Dietmar, Pascal, Walter (Austria)

Gizela, Heraklije, Paškal, Paško (Croatia)

Aneta (Czech Republic)

Bruno (Denmark)

Taido, Taidur, Taimar, Taimo, Taivo (Estonia)

Maila, Maili, Mailis, Maisa, Rebekka (Finland)

Pascal (France)

Antonella, Dietmar, Pascal (Germany)

Andronikos, Iounia, Junia, Solon (Greece)

Paszkál (Hungary)

Pasquale, Restituta (Italy)

Dailis, Herberts (Latvia)

Bazilė, Gailė, Paskalis, Virkantas (Lithuania)

Harald, Ragnhild (Norway)

Bruno, Herakliusz, Paschalis, Sławomir, Torpet, Weronika, Wiktor, Wiktoriusz (Poland)

Andronic (România)

Gizela (Slovakia)

Pascual (Spain)

Rebecka, Ruben (Sweden)

Pascal, Pascha, Pascual, Turner (USA)

Today is Also…

Day of Year: Day 138 of 2024; 228 days remaining in the year

ISO: Day 5 of week 20 of 2024

Celtic Tree Calendar: Huath (Hawthorn) [Day 6 of 28]

Chinese: Month 4 (Ji-Si), Day 10 (Xin-Si)

Chinese Year of the: Dragon 4722 (until January 29, 2025) [Wu-Chen]

Hebrew: 9 Iyar 5784

Islamic: 9 Dhu al-Qada 1445

J Cal: 18 Magenta; Foursday [18 of 30]

Julian: 4 May 2024

Moon: 72%: Waxing Gibbous

Positivist: 25 Caesar (5th Month) [Antonius]

Runic Half Month: Ing (Expansive Energy) [Day 8 of 15]

Season: Spring (Day 60 of 92)

Week: 2nd Full Week of May

Zodiac: Taurus (Day 28 of 31)

[micaluvssoccer]

What zoos do for people Claudia pina Chapter three

After I introduce my pets to the rest of the team, we get to know each other while the food is cooking.  My dog, Nanskia, puts her ball at claudia's feet asking to play with her and i notice claudia looking down at me asking for permission and i giggle and say yes but just to warn you once you start playing with her she will never stop playing with you. After getting to know others, Alexia says the food is ready and then the whole team runs into the kitchen to get their food and I wait to get mine. I sit between Alexia and Alba  and right across from Claudia and  mapi and Atinana, once I get my food. Claudia runs her foot up my leg and I start blushing hard. Both Alba and alexia nudges my side and tells me to eat so i eat my food. The team starts teasing me and gets to know me better while we are eating. 

I look down and I see both my pets at my feet and my sister's dog nala begging for food and attention. I start laughing and I nudge my sister and point under the table and she looks under the table, rolls her eyes and chuckles. Alexia gets up from the table to go put the animals out of the kitchen and I get to know everyone else. I look over at Claudia and she gives me a wink making me blush and Alba sees and she starts teasing me. Myself and Claudia start talking across the table and she asks me what kind of work do you do and I tell her that I'm a zookeeper and a veterinarian technician for the Barcelona zoo.

Then the team starts asking how I am liking my occupation and I say that I love it so much. one day you all should visit me at my job they smile and say definitely and we know Claudia will come visit you all the time. Alexia then brings up the idea of having team bonding at my work. After a while of talking we all decide to go watch tv and relax a little and as soon as I sit your dog and cat climb up on your lap. The team and alba and alexia all turn and look at you and they all start to laugh once they see both your dog and cat laying on top of you.

You turn and look at them and say  they do this all the time. I'm used to it. They all at the same time say they look so cute laying on you and you reply not when they're sitting on you and you're trying to eat. A couple of hours later you look at the time and say well i am heading out i have work tomorrow and you look at alexia and ask if she wants you to drop them off before you leave for work tomorrow morning.

I give both of my new sisters and alexia's teammates a hug and then i pick up my cat and my dog follows me out the door to go home and as soon as i walk thru the door i feed the animals and then i take the dog out one last time  and then i get ready for bed and i fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow.

I wake up early the next morning and do my morning routine and then i feed the animals then take the dog out for a walk and then i went back to get the cat and then i dropped the animals off at alexia's then i went back home to collect my things for work and as soon as i get to work i check in and then i go to the the mammals area to feed and clean exhibits.After i am done with the mammal exhibits i go and check in with the hospital ward. After working in the hospital ward I sign out for the day and I leave to go back home and as soon as I get home I shower and change and go over to Alexia's to get my pets.

I take my pets home and I decide to take the dog for a long walk and then I get home and  I see Alexia waiting at my door and she asks me if I would like to go to dinner with her and her teammates. I accepted the offer and I then went back inside  to relax before getting ready to head out to meet alexia and her teammates for dinner. I fed the animals then I put on a nice red dress and ankle boots then I left the house to go meet Alexia and she drove us to the restaurant. Alexia and I meet the rest of the team at the sushi restaurant and I sit next to claudia. Claudia and I talked throughout the night.

After the dinner Claudia and I exchanged phone numbers so we could keep in touch and on the next day off I invited Claudia over to hang out. When Claudia arrives I invite her in  and my pets greet her and I get us some drinks and snacks and I come back in from the kitchen to see her playing fetch with my dog and my cat laying down next to her. I pulled my phone out and started filming Claudia playing  fetch with my dog and my cat lying next to her and I sent it to Alexia and I said they're comfortable with her. I sit down next to Claudia and put the drinks and the snacks on the coffee table and I turned on the TV and asked her what she would like to watch and she said anything so we turned on a comedy movie and enjoyed each other's company with naniska on both of our laps.

then we decided let's take the dog out for a walk and enjoy each other's company before she has to head home to pack   for an away game. when Claudia left  for the night you fed the animals and then made yourself dinner and after dinner you jumped in the shower and then decided go to bed early. I woke up to my alarm going off and fed the animals for breakfast and took the dog out and when you got back from your walk  you dropped the animals off to either alexia or alba for the day. you head back home and get   Into your work uniform then you make yourself a quick breakfast and pack a lunch then you leave to go to work and while you're walking down the hall you send Claudia a text saying good morning.

Claudia send you a text back saying good morning and have a good day at work and you reply back thanks and have  a safe trip. while you are in the car driving to work you receive a text from Alexia saying that the team wants to do a team bonding at the zoo on our next day off so you reply back let me know what day that will be on. You get to  work and you punch in and you go to the hospital bay first to see everyone there and then you go to the mammal area to Feed the animals there and to clean their exhibits and various other tasks throughout the day and while you were heading out you Sent Claudia a text asking her how her day went and she responded back tiring and long  and then she sent you a text back asking you how your day went and I tell her the same thing and that I was heading back home to spend time with Alba and my babies.

[prettygirlgerard]

idk if ure fucking with just staying in manhattan but in queens theres the museum of the moving image (momi) and its free on thursdays and its dope ass shit

the bronx zoo is free on wednesdays, you just need to secure your time slot the monday before

uhhh. theres a cool japanese grocery store around st marks too.

if you walk back to union square from there iirc theres the strand bookstore and a significant barnes and noble. theres a whole foods u can lift from if you have a bag and sneak the stuff with you in the bathroom.

the museum of ice cream is discounted on your birth month and they give u tons of free ice cream while ure going thru it

Don’t want to like give out way too much personal info but I’m staying in Brooklyn! Some of these places I get to go with SVA as a field trip, I know museum of ice cream and the Bronx zoo were options. I spent a lot of time in union square today tbh I should’ve explored more! I’ll probably go back out later though. Thx for all this!!!

[whereintheworldismack]

So let me tell you what we saw yesterday. First we went to the Kaiser Wilhelm Memorial Church. Which is beautiful by day, but mom says it is amazing at night because of the stained glass tower. Then we past the zoo. I could see and smell some deer like animals as we entered Tiergarten. We walked thru a different part than last time. We went into the Dutch garden, the tulips were all gone, but the other flowers were very pretty. And when we sat down for a rest and a snack, we saw a fox. I had never seen one before, but it just looked like another dog to me. No one else seemed to get excited, even if their little kids were far away from them. Not sure what all the fuss is back home. At the other end of the park we visited the Reichstag government building. Mom said she will go inside and climb to the top to look down onto the floor of government when I am not with her. Next we saw a war memorial honoring the Gypsies killed by the Germans. Then on to the Brandenburg gate. It is pretty old and in the 60’s it was in between East and West Berlin. In a space that no one could access. Next to the Brandenburg is the American embassy (big, but not that impressive), but mom took me there because across from it, in the middle of the road, is a brick line. That is where the Berlin Wall once stood. Our next stop was the holocaust memorial, or the memorial to the murdered Jews of Europe, as it is officially called. It is unlike other memorials. As it is made up of monoliths of different heights. We could not walk thru because mom was with me. But she had walked through it before. I think there is a section underneath with more information about the holocaust. Our next stop was a series of story boards about the Berlin Wall. Finally we stopped at a Potsdamer plaz to look at some sections of the wall. Boy it was a lot of walking, but I learned so much about our new home.