#was also very surprised to learn that there is seemingly no fanfic about this post???

[elenirlachlagos]

SangCheng Fanfic Rec List

This list is definitely not exhaustive, I'm sure there's some I've forgotten because I neglected to put them in my bookmarks. I just dug around in there and tried to make it a little diverse and covering different authors.

I'm trying to word this post in a way that it doesn't get flagged, so please also mind the tags on the fics.

Sorted by word count, starting with the short ones.

the strangest, dampest embrace by Anbessette

Rating: teen and up

tags: crack treated seriously, shapeshifting, squid!NHS, friends to lovers, interspecies romance, Cloud Recesses study arc

POV: WWX

word count: 3.020

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: canon divergence

summary: Squid Yao Nie Huaisang is learning to shift into human form. Jiang Cheng is having the weirdest 'oh no my friend got hot' crisis in teenage history.

personal opinion on the fic: This sounds ridiculous, I know. And it kind of is. And it's also... kinda cute? This one fic is rather short, but it's the start of a series. Other fics of this series are rated explicit and with NHS being a squid, you can decuce what that means...

dark water by Morgan (duckwhatduck)

Rating: explicit

notable tags: drinking, loneliness, lots of feelings but no talking about them, hopeful ending

POV: JC

word count: 7.055

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: in universe

summary: Sect Leader Jiang invites the freshly appointed Sect Leader Nie into his chambers to have a drink, and it leads to more.

personal opinion on the fic: This is basically pwp, but filled with emotions. JC discovers, in a way, his sub nature, but he's also an emotional mess, and while NHS keeps it together more, he's also not 100% confident and in control - and this is actually one of the aspects I like about this, it feels much more authentic like this.

He's no bully, he's my friend by JaimeBlue

Rating: General audiences

notable tags: homelessness, dog!Jiang Cheng, unspecified city, , podfic available

POV: NHS

word count: 8.976

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: urban fantasy/modern cultivators AU

summary: Nie Huaisang has been living on the streets for almost two years since his brother's death, just trying to get by despite the 'things' he sees that scare him, though nobody else can see them - it's been that way since he was a boy. Then one day he chases some kids away from harassing an injured pit bull, and he finds in the dog a friend and partner in surviving life on the streets. But there is more to his dog than meets the eye, and maybe the companion he'd saved might just save him in return.

personal opinion on the fic: This fic is different. First of all, there's not much romance in it, just a hint of SangCheng at the end. Not surprising since Jiang Cheng spends most of this fic as a dog. So it's NHS-centric, too. It's very heartwrenching, but also sweet and hopeful (and I'm not even a dog-person).

the cold read by offlight

Rating: teen and up

notable tags: fake/pretend relationship, drunk making out, set in USA

POV: JC

word count: 12.022

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: college/university AU

summary: JC is annoyed by WWX constantly going on about his relationships, while he never had one. NHS comes up with the seemingly brilliant idea to start fake dating; for not entirely unselfish reasons.

personal opinion on the fic: It's a cute, fluffy fake relationship fic. Maybe things go a little too smooth overall, but sometimes you're just in the mood for that. However I do think the anger directed at JC towards the end is a little unfair; he genuinly didn't realize. There's a hot little drunk make-out scene in the middle, that doesn't go too far (so the teen rating is still correct, in my opinion).

the light of autumn by crooows

Rating: general

tags: canon compliant, hurt/comfort, talking, drinking, angst with a happy ending

POV: JC, NHS

word count: 13.845

chapter count: 5

status: completed

AU or in universe: in universe, post-canon

summary: Nie Huaisang arrives a week early for the conference which will be held in Yunmeng to discuss the position of chief cultivator.

personal opinion on the fic: This is a short one, so you can't expect a long built up and maybe the big "oh!" realization comes a little too fast. But the story shows both of them broken in ways that make them understand each other, and they're so sweet and cute together. Haha, that poor Jiang disciple.

Lights, Camera, Kiss by MissMagus

Rating: explicit

notable tags: 5+1 Things, dom/sub, brief Nie Huaisang/Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji, bottom Nie Huaisang, service top Jiang Cheng, top drop, (plus a few other tags for the "movie" they're filming)

POV: NHS

word count: 15.377

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: adult entertainment industry AU

summary: When Nie Huaisang gets paired with straight Jiang Cheng for a five-part series, he’s sure it will be an utter disaster. Until the cameras start rolling and their chemistry alights like wildfire.

personal opinion on the fic: Alright, this is pretty much pwp; most of it is set during filming. Also this is of course most probably not in any way representative of the real industry. My favourite things about this is how the whip was incorporated (not done enough, imo) and the top drop JC experiences, something I've never read before.

Just Let Me Stay Here by Your Side, That Would Be Enough by xcourtney_chaoticx

Rating: teen and up

notable tags: friends to lovers, arranged marriage, canonical character death, post-traumatic stress disorder - PTSD, non-sexual intimacy, Jiujiu content, OCs

POV: NHS

word count: 15.822

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: canon divergence

summary: In the wake of the Sunshot Campaign and the sworn brotherhood of Nie Mingjue, Lan Xichen, and Jin Guangyao, it is decided that Nie Huaisang should be married into the Yunmeng Jiang. He is married to Jiang Cheng.

personal opinion on the fic: Sweet, fluffy slow-burn arranged marriage - sometimes you just need something like this. (Ok, maybe not always only fluffy, some of the dark things of canon still happen and there's the PTSD tag...)

Neutral Territory by Pyrria

Rating: mature

notable tags: movie violence, everyone lives/nobody dies, no Golden Core transfer, gangsters, bar/pub setting, drinking

POV: NHS

word count: 19.185

chapter count: 2

status: completed

AU or in universe: cyberpunk AU

summary: A series of conversations between Nie Huaisang, the overlooked, underestimated, playboy younger brother of the former leader of the Qinghe gang and Jiang Wanyin, a lowtek bar owner who knows more than he should and is connected to some very dangerous people. Is Jiang Wanyin someone Nie Huaisang can trust as he tries to unravel the attempt on his brother's life? Or is he one of the many moving pieces acting against Qinghe? If he's already fallen, does it even matter?

personal opinion on the fic: I really like the idea of the loss of a Golden Core being changed into not having cybernetic implants. I love the description of the AR technological world contrasted with the "old-fashioned" real worldness of JCs bar - it makes me wish I could actually see this (as film, animation, whatever). Plus it's always nice to have some uncle/nephew interaction and Nie Zonghui included. Yay for family. The mature rating is for the violence that the whole gang theme includes; I'm really bad with gore and violence and such but it hardly bothers me, so I'm sure most others will be fine.

a loving kind of boy by artsy_alice

Rating: teen and up

notable tags: tooth-rotting fluff, coming out, Jiang Cheng and puppies, 5+1 Things, childhood friends getting together, asexual Jiang Cheng, minor WangXian

POV: mixed, it's a bit chaotic (but it works out)

word count: 19.740

chapter count: 7

status: completed

AU or in universe: modern cultivators AU

summary: Or, 5 Times Nie Huaisang Comforts Jiang Cheng Through the Power of Cuddles, Heart-to-Hearts and Cute Animals, and the 1 Time it was the Other Way Around

personal opinion on the fic: I love the world-building in this. It's basically a collection of scenes from their lives, so there's not much development or plot or anything, and the SangCheng just kinda happens, so don't expect big romantiv events. Make sure to check out the author's social media accounts, though, because there's lots of cute art from this AU.

bright sunlight filtered by givemebaretrees

Rating: explicit

notable tags: arranged marriage, hopeful ending

POV: JC

word count: 20.175

chapter count: 1

status: completed

AU or in universe: canon/in universe

summary: Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang are arranged to marry each other by Jiang Fengmian and Madame Yu, which seems to make everyone happy—up until Wei Wuxian's life is changed by the Sunshot Campaign. Jiang Cheng is left to pick up the pieces of every broken promise his brother left behind, and some of his own, too.

personal opinion on the fic: I really like how the story weaves itself between the events we all know; it mentions them but doesn't do any unnecessary retelling. JC and NHS slowly dance around each other, getting closer, and then again further away. I kind of wished the NSFW part was a little expanded, then again it also fits like this.

Four Days in Lanling by halotolerant

Rating: explicit

notable tags: first time, mastermind!Nie Huaisang, grief/mourning, drunkenness, podfic available

POV: JC

word count: 21.020

chapter count: 6

status: completed

AU or in universe: in universe, partly post-canon

summary: During his first Cultivaton Conference as clan leader, NHS does some scheming that doesn't directly pay for his masterplan, and after the events at Guanyin temple, JC begs him to help his nephew again. And maybe also something else that happened between them can be rekindled, too.

personal opinion on the fic: The fic treads a fine line in making JC the oblivious and inexperienced and passive one; this could go very wrong - but it doesn't. He does have his expertise and he's growing into his role. They both have their obvious traumas and weaknesses, too. I do love how clever NHS is in this, it's a joy to watch how he manipulates and no ones notices.

Heart opening flow by gekidasa

Rating: teen and up

notable tags: yoga, college/university, background WangXian, awkward boners, jealous!JC, established NieLan

POV: JC

word count: 27.002

chapter count: 10

status: completed

AU or in universe: modern AU

summary: Jiang Cheng agrees to do a class at Cloud Recesses Yoga as a favor to Wei Wuxian. He was only planning to go once, but then Nie Huaisang walks into the class, and Jiang Cheng is immediately smitten. Unbeknownst to Jiang Cheng, the feeling is entirely mutual.

personal opinion on the fic: This is one of those fics where clearly the author pours in much knowledge about their interest. There's reference pics for yoga poses and all (it's pretty advanced yoga, though, so don't try this at home). NHS tries his hardest with flirting, but he is up against JCs insecurities. They dance around each other for a bit, but it's so sweet. It's seperated very conveniently into short chapters.

A Sweet and Vicious Cycle by Kendershire

Rating: explicit

notable tags: sugar baby/sugar daddy, emotional manipulation, pretend relationship, scheming Nie Huaisang, protective Jiang Cheng, panic attacks, terrible Jiang parents, demisexual!Jiang Cheng

POV: NHS

word count: 37.192

chapter count: 12

status: in progress

AU or in universe: modern AU

summary: After his life was upended and his brother incarcerated, NHS has to make a living with a generally disdained job - and uses it for his carefully planned revenge scheme. He intends to use his childhood friend for his means, too; but it doesn't quite go as planned.

personal opinion on the fic: The JC in this fic is what all those rude young CEOs in Asian dramas should be and never are. He's so noble that it'd be easy to condemn NHS for what he is doing, if it wasn't obvious that NHS is not unaffected. I so love the idea of the Crisis Blanket! Everyone should have one. This fic is not completed and has slow updates, but it's not abandoned.

perfect pretenders by skyestiel

Rating: teen and up

notable tags: WangXian, Gusu Trio shenanigans, practice kissing, making out, getting together, friends to lovers, mutual pining

POV: NHS, WWX, JC, LWJ alternating

word count: 60.549

chapter count: 15

status: completed

AU or in universe: in universe, canon-divergence

summary: During a drunken get-together, wei Wuxian has the glorious idea of a kissing competition between him, JC and NHS. Later, and still drunk, JC has the equally glorious idea that him and NHS could outdo WWx with the help of - each other.

personal opinion on the fic: Yay, Gusu times trio/quartet content! Happy innocent youth. I love all their interactions, I can very well picture them like this. It's so cute, but also sensual - I think chapter 5 has to be one of my favourite SangCheng content.

Shorelines in the Moonlight by Emrysian

Rating: teen and up (but there is an outsourced NSFW scene that has an explicit rating)

tags: hurt/comfort, suicidal ideation, Junior Quartet, qi deviation/unrest, loneliness, anxiety, slow burn, angst with a happy ending, family feels, JL/LSZ, healing, relapse

POV: alternating (JC, LWJ, JL, LSZ...)

word count: 62.854

chapter count: 27

status: completed

AU or in universe: in universe, post-canon

summary: A year after the events at Guanyin Temple, everyone seems to be moving on with their lives and learning how to live as they are. That is, until Sect Leader Nie's health is brought into question at a Discussion Conference, and soon everyone realizes that there are some things that have yet to be addressed. Grief takes many forms. What happens to those who are left behind?

personal opinion on the fic: Completely self-indulgent, but I love how everyone starts worrying about NHS. He even gets those infamous hugs from JC - since CQL this is something I'm jealous of. I love how the juniors crush on NHS, it's so cute and also hilarious. The time everyone spends together in Qinghe at the festival and in Lotus Pier, is so sweet to read with its family feels and budding love... Not everything goes smooth, though, there's a little more realistic approach to healing.

Come Go With Me by roseclaw

Rating: explicit

notable tags: set in USA, therapy, moving away from family, surfing, chronic pain, mentions of a being in a car accident and witnessing death (chapter 13), yunmeng sib feels, accidental kitten acquisition, small town vibes, lots of food preparing, house renovation, lots of ogling, making friends

POV: JC

word count: 102.289

chapter count: 15

status: completed

AU or in universe: modern AU

summary: Six years after he was in a car accident that killed his parents and left him with hardware in his knee and chronic pain, former competitive surfer Jiang Cheng quits city life, takes his parents’ inheritance, and buys a dilapidated inn on the ocean to fix up.

personal opinion on the fic: Everyone is mentioned in this fic, seriously, everyone, including Zonghui; there's kittens and even Wang Yizhou's thigh tattoo gets a mention, too. Personally I think that JC (often very relatable) and NHS (who stays mysterious throughout) feel a little OOC, though it may only be the vastly different setting. I do love the setting. I don't know a thing about the area in which this is set nor the surfing community, but it has a certain atmosphere I really like coming back to. (Somebody do a mood board?) The relationship between the siblings is really well done. When I first read this, my mother had a knee surgery, so a lot in this sounds familiar, especially how a lot of things that are normal to others are out of the question, and how overdoing it on good days can easily lead to bad days.

we both know better (maybe we don't) by captain_apostrophe

Rating: explicit

notable tags: fake/pretend relationship, demisexual!Jiang Cheng, slow burn, rich families, nobody is dead, background WangXian, occasional smut (often XueSang), Jiujiu content, robbery, sexuality exploration, angst and hurt/comfort, terrible Jiang parents, family dynamics, childhood trauma, non-sexual intimacy, divorce, skip codes for explicit content

POV: NHS, JC alternating

word count: 281.873

chapter count: 56

status: on hiatus

AU or in universe: modern AU

summary: NHS was hired to paint a mural on WWXs pizzeria wall but then WWX has another job for him: be the fake date for his very attractive brother to get people off his back about marriage and kids. The problem is that WWX didn't inform JC of his plan - and it goes how you might expect it to; or even worse. But since the worst damage seems to already been done, JC decides "why not" and the deal is on until WWXs wedding.

personal opinion on the fic: The "JC is a martial arts instructor" content you didn't know you needed. NHS is so thirsting over JC in this, and he's taking us all on that trip with him. The growing casual intimacy between them is so lovely to read (I'm a little jealous, really). I was a little worried about the addition of an OC to the family, but it works. The big "oh!" moment is so cheesy, so tropey - and so, so good. There are a couple of flaws. Sometimes it tries too desperately to be woke, like there's some secret plan to squeeze in a whole modern sex ed curriculum, to the point that it feels like in school books when the authors try to put some kind of story around a math problem (in this case the other way around) but it ends up being awkward. The demisexuality of JC is really well done; some other parts not that much, in my opinion. The more obvious problem is of course the current status. I'm not surprised, it had this vibe the last couple of chapters... But if you don't mind the uncertain future, do read. Or you could always stop after chapter 42.

[mashkaroom]

Ok, lmao, I was taken by @raven-harlot​‘s idea to translate popular tumblr posts into Yiddish, and of course my favorite ever tumblr post is “you cannot kill me in a way that matters”, so here is my translation and translator’s notes. I ask that you lmk if you see any errors/have any comments and I would love, love, love to see other people’s translations!

איך, האַלטנדיק אַ פּיסטויל צו אַ שוואָם: דערצייל מיר דער שם, דו פֿונגוס-טינוף 1

שוואָם: פֿילסטו 2 דער פֿאַרברענונג פֿון דייַן האַרץ? 3 פילסטו אין זיך דאָס געראַנגל? די מורא אין מיר איז  מחוץ אַלץ וואָס קען מאַכן דייַנע נשנה. דו קענסט מיך נישט באַטייַטיקלעך דערהרגענען.

איך, אָנשטעלנדיק דאָס צינגל, מייַן פּנים גיסנדיק מיט טרערן: איך האָב דיך נישט קיין מורא, צו אַל די שוואַרצע-יאָר! 4

אָ.פּ, וואָס מיינט עס, האָ?? 5

צעפֿוילונג עקסיסטירט ווי אַן איבערבלייַבנדיק געשטאַלט פֿון לעבן. 6

ס'איז אַ שוידערדיק ענטפער, אַ גוטן טאָג דיר.

1. I translated “you fungal piece of shit” as “du fungus-tinef”. The Comprehensive Yiddish-English Dictionary (CEYD), aka verterbukh.org, gives “tinef” as  “ filth, dirt; excrement; shoddy goods, junk; vulg. good-for-nothing, lowlife”. I also kept the “you” that the original uses for emphasis -- I’m not 100% sure that Yiddish regularly uses this same construction, though I suspect that it certainly exists in English-influenced dialects even if not in others.

2. I chose to have both the mushroom and the narrator be on informal you with each other. This can imply several things: one, they exist in a context where formality is not important to either of them. In a violent situation like this, people are unlikely to use formal you. However, the mushroom might have chosen to use formal you to indicate a sort of distance from the narrator and from this situation, implying potentially that the mushroom is much more important to the narrator than vice versa. Another option is that the mushroom and the narrator have an existing relationship at a sufficient degree of closeness as to have made the switch in the past from formal to informal you. I find this compelling. A third benefit to using informal you is that that’s the register you address G-d in. In using informal you, the possibility that either of them can be G-d is not precluded. If the mushroom is G-d, then this is a scene of a heretic making a last plea -- before he kills his G-d, he wants to know it. If the narrator is G-d, then this is a vulnerable G-d, perhaps an amnesiac one, making a plea to someone -- a believer, a being even more ancient and powerful? -- and the mushroom answers: can you feel your heart burning? (that is god) can you feel the struggle within? (that is god) the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters (you are so powerful that you have created me, and now I, too, can create. even if you kill me, that spark of creation will remain. i am yours.) or maybe (and even that is not enough. you may be god, but I am something more. even a god, even death, cannot take away my essence). Perhaps they are both G-d. The burning heart, the struggle within, the fear more powerful -- they are all elements of G-d. Only together can they discover the true name of G-d. I also like the idea that they are dealing with each other, here, as individuals. A mushroom is only one visible part of a mycelial net, and if the mushroom has already surfaced it has likely spread its spores. The narrator addresses  the mushroom as though it were an individual, as though it were possible for it to be an individual, and the mushroom replies that there is no “me” -- of course you cannot kill a mushroom in a way that matters. You, on the other hand -- what lives on of you? What the narrator is so scared of in the next line is that even if the mushroom cannot die in a way that matters, he can.

3 I also considered ?פילסטו אַז דייַן האַרץ ברענט? & פילסטו ווי ברענט דייַן האַרץ? as options here. I chose the one I did because option 2 (filstu az dayn harts brent) seems to learn towards the question “are you aware that your heart is burning?” while option 3 (filstu vi brent dayn harts) leans towards “can you the particular way in which your heart is burning". I decided not to take a stance either way as to whether the mushroom is bringing the burning to the narrator's attention for the first time or pointing out a new shade to the burning and do the closest literal translation.

4. Something that English has which Yiddish lacks (at least that I don't know a good equivalent to) is the versatility of the word "fuck". The Comprehensive English-Yiddish Dictionary (CEYD) suggests appending 'tsu al di shvartse yor' to phrases where you'd use fucking/wtf/other fuck phrases, so that's what I did here.

5. Chose not to mess with the O.P. acronym esp as origineler poster is a perfectly acceptable translation. You may also remember that the original is "Hey, OP? What the FUCK does this mean?" I chose not to use 'tsu al di shvartse yor' here again because while in the previous sentence the "fucking" is intensifying "not scared", here the 'fuck' is rather intensifying the state of asking a question rather than any individual component, so I instead added the question intensifier "ha?" and an extra exclamation point to make up for lack of capitalization.

6. This line's a bit too literal and I'm not sure if it sounds like a gross calque. I couldn't find a direct equivalent for "extant", so I used "iberblaybndik", left over. The world "geshtalt" literally means form, image, etc. In Russian we also say "to close a geshtalt" to mean "get closure". Geshtalt in Russian has the sense of a whole unified picture rather than the sum of its parts. So I also like that in a more slavic context, the last line could be read as pointing to the idea that decay is what is left to complete the wholeness of life (and without it life is incomplete).

[nataliaphantomhivesblog]

In the end of it all, Monaca Towa was still a child.

To start this off, this isn't my usual Black Butler posts but ive been meaning to talk about Danganronpa for a hot minute, so please bear with me! Second, this is solely my opinion and before anyone wants to attack me please read thoroughly first. Thank you:)

(Spoiler warning for Danganronpa: Ultra Despair Girls and Danganronpa 3)

Also, before we dive in I'm going to list some trigger warnings:

Physcological abuse

Physical abuse

Manipulation

P*dophillia

Suicide attempt

Violence (?)

Childhood trauma

Please take care and read at your own risk<3

Hello there Danganronpa fandom! Today I will be talking about Monaca Towa (as stated in the title) and how people often minimize her trauma and sometimes forget the fact that shes still a child who got heavily manipulated by Junko too.

Monaca is seemingly very amiable and caring, because of her charming personality, all of the Warriors of Hope love her and try their best to keep her happy and go along with what she wants. However, it's slowly revealed that she is actually manipulative and cunning behind her friendly facade.

Monoca is a character that is cruel, manipulative, and extremly unhinged. Many of her actions cannot be excused or justified, but you can understand where she's coming from.

Monaca's Backstory:

She was born an unwanted child by both her father and her mother. Monaca's mother was supposed to take care of her but instead abandoned the child soon after her birth. Because of all her actions, Monaca saw her mother as a completely selfish and pathetic person. Monaca's father thought of giving her to an orphanage but instead took her into his family.

However, Monaca was always unwanted and everyone else felt uncomfortable around her. Every time Monaca smiled or joked, the others looked at her coldly, as if she didn't deserve to laugh. Every time she spoke, the others turned silent. His older-half brother thought of her as an alien, not part of the family.

She was also physically abused to the point that she pretended to be seriously wounded for them to stop as a result.

Monaca also attended Hope's Peak Elementary School and was part of the "trouble-makers class" along with Nagisa, Masaru, Jataro, and Kotoko.

Along with her fellow abused classmates, she planned a group suicide; however, Monaca never had any plans to commit suicide in the first place and was planning to let the others die as a prank.

The group suicide was stopped by Junko, who took the kids in and manipulated them by treating them with kindness and love.

Monaca then helped Junko mass produce Monokumas for the Tragedy by using her position as a representative of the Towa Group.

She lied to her father and the other adults in order to produce the Monokumas, telling them that she wanted to create futuristic robots that could be domestic helpers and emergency aid workers.

Due to her separation from the family and her genius, her family decided to give her leg room to do what she wanted as long as she brought in profits to the company, and didn't delve too deeply into her plans.

Things to keep in mind about Monoca's backstory:

She was emotionally and physically abused from a very young age.

She started to pretend to be paraplegic because she was finally treated with some kindness and she could have more control over people.

She convinced Nagisa, Jataro, Kotoko and Masaru to commit suicide.

Out of all the Warriros of Hope, Junko took the most intrest in Monoca due to her position, meaning that she was the one who got used and manipulated the most.

How Monoca's mindset works:

The moment she got physically abused to the point that she had to fake her injuries to make her family feel bad was the moment she learned that through sympathy from others comes power. Due to her families neglection and abuse, she started to quickly pick up on things in which benefited her yet hurt others.

She started to use manipulative tactics on her family to gain control over them. She then started implicating these tactics with the Warriors of Hope.

When Junko got into the picture, everything changed for the worst. Junko was the only person in Monaca's life who showed her affection. Even though deep down Monaca knew Junko only cared for her as a means to use her robotics genius for the Tragedy, Monaca didn't care, and happily helped out Junko with her plans if it meant being loved and appreciated in return. At the heart of it, despite all her horrific acts, that's a very child-like thing to do, right? So when Junko dies, Monaca's entire reason for living basically disappears.

AI Junko via Kurokuma may have planted the idea of a successor in her head, but in Monaca's mind it's a way to get her big sis back, and very specifically chooses to mold Komaru into becoming Junko's successor. That's for a big reason, Monaca doesn't want to become Junko, I'd say she actually just wanted her big sister back who would love and appreciate her again, and hence tried to make someone else take on that role initially. Once again, that's the mindset of a child.

Monaca's relationship with the Warriors of Hope:

The Warriors of Hope are a group of children who are extremely resentful and hateful of adults, regardless of whether or not they were involved in their rough paths. 

We all know that the Warriros of Hope are extememly tramutized kids. Masaru had alcoholic parents who physically abused him, Jataro was physcologically abused to the point he bealived he was so ugly that if anyone saw his "repulsive" face they would die, Kotoko was r*ped multiple times by disgusting p*dophilic men (not to mention, Monaca's brother was attracted to her), and last but not least we have Nagisa who had pressuring parents who wanted to raise him as the child prodigy and expirimented on him constantly.

Monaca used the Warriros of Hope's trauma against them, manipulating them to the point were they had to do her bidding completly.

As much as I hate to say it, Monaca truly saw them as pawns. Although there are some instances where she openly declares her care for the Warriors of Hope, it's likely she does that as a form of emotional manipulation.

If anything, she probably did see them as equal in the beginning but then when she started to gain control over her own family, she started to do the same with the Warriors of Hope as a way to protect herself from getting hurt, then again this is my baseless assumption.

Her dynamic with Nagito:

Monaca was amused by Nagito's strange behavior and contradicting beliefs and appeared to be somewhat annoyed with him at the times. However, the two appeared to at least seemingly respect each other in some way, as they treated each other somewhat formally as allies.

Her dynamic with Nagito is one of the most intresting ones. Obviously I think that her being rasied by Nagito was potentially a dangerous thing, considering Nagito's goal was for Monaca to become Enoshima's successor. Monaca seemed to agree with this goal, but Nagito's constant rambling about hope and despair made Monaca bored and feel embarrassed about the whole thing.

She claims he made her an adult in a way, as she grew up in the mental sense and became more cynical and apathetic, not really caring about anything.

In the end, Monaca found Nagito creepy and annoying, but she also appeared to get closer to him during their time together, while originally calling him just "Mister Servant" in UDG, she later refers to him as "Big Bro" in Danganronpa 3. I do think their dynamic was sort of soft and I would've loved to have seen more of it. Honestly the concept of Nagito being a soft brother to Monaca warms my heart, and the wasted potential will forever anger me.

(If any Danganronpa fanfic writer or any writer in general is reading this post: if u could be so kind and do a PLATONIC Nagito and Monaca prompt and tag me in it, I would love you forever!!)

My opinion on Monaca:

I think that Monaca was a very well-written character who deserved more than what she got in the end of Danganronpa 3. She was abused, mistreated and belittled by her family. If anything, I see her as a completely misguided little girl. If she actually had a positive authoritative influence in her life, she wouldn't have turned astray.

A lot of people disregard Monaca's trauma and forget that at the end of the day, Monaca was a child who the moment she was born, the people who were supposed to love her were unwelcoming.

Don't get me wrong though, there is no way in hell I will ever justify or condone the things Monaca has done. If anything, I just think that she alongside the rest of the Warriors of Hope should've been properly taken care of.

Also, if you dislike/hate Monaca thats 100% valid! She did a lot of inexcusable things and its alright to hate on her. I personally love her character but I know she is not everyones cup of tea.

If you read all the way, I'm actually surprised! Thank you and I hope you enjoyed<333

[halliescomut]

I have a Fic request for KimChay

So like many of us on this platform I got pulled (mostly willingly) into the just absolute wonder that is KinnPorsche The Series, and we can talk later about the full effects of that in a different post, because this one has a point I SWEAR!

In addition to watching the series I have been reading multiple fanfics, and while I love all of the couples, I'm really digging KimChay right now, because to be honest Jeff is just the textbook description of attractive, and Barcode as Porchay is just Sunshine in human form and I mean, how could I resist???

So I have a fic request? suggestion? inspiration? IDK, but what I really want is a fic (long, short, multi-chapter, one-shot, IDC) where Kim teaches/trains Chay in self defense, and it turns spicy maybe?. Now I have a lot of ideas for this, that I'll outline in a minute, but I'm asking for this solely because I HAVE NO IDEA how to write it myself. I don't have enough knowledge or experience with martial arts of any description to do this well, and so I simply can't, but if this creates a little plot bunny for you please for the love of Kinn's half-open shirt follow that bunny wherever they take you. For me? Please?

Now onto ideas:

For one-shot or short, there's really not much more context beyond Chay sunshines Kim into teaching him basic self-defense, and so he finally does and we get a scene of the training and it's either adorable/hilarious or v serious but suddenly very hot...or both. For the humor aspect the vibe that I'm seeing is a bit like Julien trying to teach Jenna Jiu Jitsu (part 1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vkvTpmQ7M48 and part 2: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=In7FBG6rPw0 ). Like, there's some seriousness attempted, but also Chay makes Kim laugh too much, so it just devolves into absolute insanity. For serious, I mean...reference any Kinn Porsche fight scene and adjust for personality and skill level. Bonus points for a bonus scene of Tankhun watching it on the CCTV with his bodyguards (Pete included) like it's one of his dramas.

For longer form, this could be accurate to current show canon (haven't finished the novel yet so I don't all of the context there) or AU-ish, that can be up to you.

-Chay goes to Pete, or if we're going AU, Big or Chan and asks them to train him, and they eventually give in because we've all seen Porchay's face. I think that Porsche would say no to Chay learning self-defense (or fighting) because he's always going to be there to protect him historical canon evidence be damned, and really Kim would be on that same wagon so. But you could also go with Chay doesn't even try asking Kim or Porsche first, he just assumes they would say no.

-He either keeps it a secret or not, base this around how much you would want to see him progress I guess, because I think it would alter the context for when Kim takes over. For example if we go for, it's not a secret so Kim essentially shows up for the first lesson and can't stand seeing another man's hands on Chay regardless of the context and takes over. If he keeps it a secret, I do think it could be fun for him to become fairly proficient, and actually hold his own a little bit against Kim, especially since we know Kim would hold back a little.

-Also, I think if Pete or Chan were Chay's first teacher, they would teach him a trick that might help him get Kim by surprise, at least once.

-Extra credit: Any and all Tankhun reactions to the general goings on, because of course. High levels of banter, both sarcastic and sweet. Porsche finding out about his training by accident and being mad for really no reason, but just because Porsche is an over-protective doofus who would seemingly rather throw himself into danger before seeing Porchay or Kinn break a sweat. Any and all humorous inclusions of Vegas just snarking on everyone. Maybe Macau joins the class too, so that Chay has a sparring buddy?

Also, there's no specified rating I'd be looking for, but I do think if it's in your comfort zone some close combat training could turn pretty sensual pretty quickly as the entire KinnPorsche series has shown.

I generally read most fics on AO3, so if you have an account there and you post there, just let me know. You could post it here if that's more your style. I also do occasionally read on FF.net and Wattpad. But seriously, if this post inspired you and you write something PLEASE let me know!!! I want to read this fic so bad. I'm now going to proceed to tag the everloving heck out of this post in the hopes that it finds ANYONE who may want to write it.

[princip1914]

A few thoughts on writing longfic

I’ve had this post brewing for a while and I figured since today is a Friday I might as well let it out into the wild. 

First off, this is not writing advice. I don’t feel qualified to give writing advice. This is a few observations I’ve made over the course of trying to write something that feels, well, long. Fandom is full of excellent authors writing long chaptered fic, but I don’t see a lot of people talking about how they go about producing such fics. I remember feeling like long fic was really out of reach for me when I started writing again in the summer of 2019 after not writing for years and years and I wanted to talk a bit about how that changed for me. Of course, this post comes with all the caveats that there is no need to ever write long fic if you’re not feeling it. Some of my favorite authors write mostly or only oneshots! But, if you are interested, here’s my lengthy, self indulgent, and entirely personal take on ~the longfic process~ below the cut. 

First, to get this out of the way: long fic is anything that feels long or complicated to you, the author. “I’m working on my long fic” can mean that you’re branching out from microfiction to write something that’s 2k long, or it can mean you’ve got a multi-part 800k epic. There’s no objective measure of if something is “long fic,” Your own personal definitions can also change as you grow in confidence or change your focus as a writer (a little over a year ago when I finished Doubt Thou the Stars are Fire topping out at 31k, that felt very very long to me. Now it feels….still long, but not very very long.) 

Here are a few specific things that helped me write something long. I don’t know if they will be interesting for anyone else, but at the very least writing these down has been a fun way for me to reflect on my own process. 

Practice exercises. Ok, this is going to sound exceedingly obvious, but writing one shots prepares you for writing chaptered fic. Here’s what I mean more specifically: if you know you want to write (as a totally hypothetical example) a chaptered fic set in America in the summer that relies heavily on a nature metaphors, is written out of chronological order, and features a melancholy tone--it helps to write a few one shots like that before you embark on the Big Fic. Just like artists tend to do sketches before starting a big piece, it’s very helpful to write something small that gives you a feel for the ~vibe~ of what you’re trying to do in the long fic. It’s helpful for all the usual reasons--you get to know a specific version of the characters which helps plan out a character driven plot for the long fic--but it’s also helpful because you will learn if the tone and mood of the fic has enough staying power to capture your interest for the long haul. For instance, I have a few unfinished chaptered fics that have a humorous tone. I wish I had done more short humorous fics before starting them, because I would have realized that I don’t currently have the mental stamina to hold up a humorous tone for the length of a chaptered fic (hopefully that will change and I will finish Last Days some time this century!). 

Plan it out ahead of time. I used google sheets for The False and the Fair. I do not think God intended google sheets to be used for fiction, but that was not going to stop me. On a more serious note, I think the best tool for planning fiction is the one you’re the most comfortable with--the notes app in your phone, handwriting, word, google drive, sheets, chalk board, summoning circle, the blood of your enemies, etc. The reason I chose to use sheets is that I knew from the very beginning that I wanted certain things to happen at specific places in the story--for instance, I wanted the first kiss to happen at the end of the first third of the story and I wanted the “reveal” about the mine accident to happen at the end of the second third of the story. But, I didn’t know what was supposed to go in between those elements. A traditional outline for a story at this point in development might have looked like: 

Meet cute

Kiss

Reveal 

Ending 

But, what my brain needed was to preserve the blank spaces in between these story elements, and specifically to preserve the right amount of blank space between these story elements so that it didn’t end up, for instance, that the first kiss was halfway through rather than a third of the way through. In this way, I found google sheets an invaluable tool for pacing in the early parts of the planning process. I simply made 30 rows assuming 30 chapters, and started plugging in the elements I knew I wanted in the locations I wanted them. Then I filled in the blank spaces by asking myself “how do we get from X plot element to Y plot element in Z amount of chapters.” I’m not a mountain climber, but I’ve often thought about the first things that go into the spreadsheet in terms of mountain climbing terminology.  In climbing, a crux move, which can be anywhere along the route, is the most difficult move of the route: if you can’t do it, you can’t do the route. I think of the first things that go into the planning spreadsheet as the crux moves of the story, the most important pieces around which everything else turns. It was not an accident that those were also all the first scenes of the fic that I wrote; if I couldn’t do those scenes, I couldn’t do the story the way I planned it so I wanted to know early on if I needed to make changes.

Make changes if you have to: even though it helps to have things planned in advance, don’t resist the story if it tries to change on you while you’re writing it. Usually the feeling that you have to make changes stems from having a plot that is not entirely character driven. As you write the story, the characters reveal themselves and sometimes the plot has to change to change with the characters’ motivations. Here’s an area where fanfic writers have a leg up on everyone else: if you write fic, you already know the characters really well. That means, (in my experience anyway) it’s less likely that you’ll have a surprise character development which leads to a rethinking of the whole plot. Less likely, but not completely unlikely, unfortunately.

Lie to yourself: The False and the Fair was supposed to be 90k words. I thought that sounded reasonable, a little less than 3x the longest fic I had ever written. Now it's 161k and will probably top out a little over 170k. Ooops. But I never would have set out to write something that long. I wouldn’t have thought I could do it, even though anyone more experienced looking at my plans for the fic probably would have laughed at the idea I could cover all those plot points in 90k. Ignorance is bliss. Protect your ignorance.

Scrivener: Long fic for me means “fic that is long enough you can’t hold all the parts of it in your head at once.” That’s where Scrivener comes in (or another app if you’d rather, but I really like Scrivener for the ability to see the project either linearly or as condensed notecards). You can put together an organizational scaffold in Scrivener that allows you to move back and forth between the forest and the trees. So, for instance, you might be going for a jog and come up with the perfect line of dialogue for chapter 27 when you’re only up to chapter 5 in terms of writing progress. With Scrivener, you can go home, and put that dialogue in the “bucket”/index card/whatever for chapter 27 without compromising your ability to see chapter 5 clearly or muddying up your google doc. You can then use the fact that you’ve started writing bits and pieces of the later chapters in conjunction with the tool of lying to yourself that, actually, you’ve written a lot more of the fic than you realize and that when you get to chapter 27 it won’t be as hard as chapter 5 because you’ve put in the groundwork already. In my experience, this lie turns out to be true about 50% of the time, which is better than 0% of the time.

Digestible mini arcs: The False and the Fair was originally broken up into thirds. I thought it would be 90k and 30k was the longest I had written, so thirds seemed to make sense. Also, 3 is a nice, time honored storytelling number. I think it’s good to give yourself seemingly achievable milestones along the way to completion. These milestones (for me anyway) lined up well with the “crux moments” I’ve described. If you’re someone who likes to write out of order, writing your way to an already written milestone can feel like sailing to an island where you get to rest for a bit from the stormy seas before setting out for the next island in the archipelago.

“It's all part of the process”: I’m categorically incapable of describing things without resorting to running metaphors, and so I apologize in advance, but I am now going to do the insufferable thing of comparing writing a long fic to running a marathon. Here’s the thing with a marathon. You are not going to feel good every step of the way. We all know this. It’s a marathon, it’s supposed to hurt a little bit, especially at the end. In the same way you literally cannot write something novel length or even novella or long short story length without, at least at some point, feeling bad about yourself and your writing. But you also can’t run a marathon if the whole thing is agony, and for most people, it’s not--your meat sack shuffling along the course is subjected to the slings and arrows of all sorts of weird body chemistry that only happens when you push it to its limits. So, you’ll be in agony and then the endorphins will kick in for a while and you’ll be thinking “this isn’t nearly as bad as everyone said,” and then you’ll drink some water at a rest stop and feel like a God for half a mile before you crash and you’re in agony again until that one perfect song comes up on the playlist...and you get the idea. Writing something long, for me at least, is a bit like that. There are massive ups and downs. The key for me is to just understand it’s all part of the process, a necessary step on the way to the finish line. If the fic is 10 chapters long, at some point you have to write chapter 5. Just like you have to write chapter 5, at some point you also have to go through a bit of despair before reaching the end. It is unfortunately non-optional. In fact, despairing is something you can check off your list each time you’ve done it. Cut dialogue tags, check. Feel awful about my writing for thirty minutes, check. Write ending section, check. Often I feel that the stress and shame and fear that come with bad emotions while writing are worse than the bad emotions themselves. It really helps me to remember these emotions are all part of the process and nothing to worry about. If I didn’t have them, then I would worry! 

I certainly have plenty more to say about writing, but this ramble has gone on long enough. If you’re interested in any of this stuff, please feel free to send me an ask. 

I would also love to know more about everyone else’s writing processes, so feel free to pop into my ask box to talk about your own approach too! I am very interested in this stuff! 

[mytwinklelights]

A Reunion - Part 1 | Peter Parker x Stark! GN Reader

A/N: Remember over a month ago when I wrote this preview and didn’t post again? Oops sorry, I had to take a little break from tumblr because I was reading way too much fanfic. But now I’m back, just to post, still no reading for a while! Umm but yeah, here’s the first part! I can’t guarantee when part 2 will be posted but it’ll definitely be within the next 2 weeks! I hope you like it, please let message me with any feedback because I need validation to stay motivated lol

Summary: Y/N is an Avenger, the youngest Avenger. Then, Peter Parker comes along and they’re happy to finally have someone their age to hang out with, even if it was the boy they spent their senior year of high school crushing over.

Content Warnings: I don’t think there are any - let me know if I missed any though!

Genres: Friends to lovers, Stark! Reader, Frequent cameos from Avengers and them being cute, Slow burn, Fluff, Angst

Word Count: 2019

                                                             ----

“Alright gang.” Tony begins, standing in front of all the Avengers at the end of a large oval table in the conference room.

“I’m sure you’ve seen these ‘viral videos’ of this Spider-Boy kid swinging around the city and being a friendly neighbourhood vigilante. Well, Happy and I have managed to track him down and he’s agreed to join the team”

“Viral videos of superheroes?” Steve exclaims, looking at Tony whilst tilting his head and looking genuinely exhausted. “I’m still catching up on these keyboard cats and kids biting fingers”.

I giggle. Having Steve around was just the same as having an uncle you saw once the year who lived of the grid. He was extremely sweet, but utterly clueless to anything other than his job. But I mean, that job does include fighting evil aliens.

“Anyway…” Tony continues as the other Avengers chuckles die down after Steve’s outcry “he arrived not too long ago. Happy is next door giving him all the T&Qs and they should be done now. Let me just check and I’ll introduce you all.” Tony then leaves the room, and the other Avengers start to talk among themselves.

I pull out my phone and type ‘NYC spider boy’ into YouTube clicking on the second search result with 20 million views. I have seen this video before as my friend Michael sent it to me around a week ago.

“Do you think there are many other super kids wandering around the city?” Sam asks, whilst looking at the video of my shoulder. Currently the hero is stopping a city bus from off-roading into some confused tourists by building up a wall with his web.

“I doubt it, I mean I guess he’s the only one going viral” I answer, moving the angle of my phone so the others who have gathered around me can see “but it would be cool to be able to meet some people my age who do what I do, no offence guys”

They all laugh. Being the youngest Avenger and hanging out with 30+ year olds all the time can be kind of isolating, but it’s like having a super close family. A family who also happen to be in life and death situations regularly together. But that’s a great bonding experience I would say.

“Guys, this is Peter, the Spider-Boy” Tony draws our attention away from my phone to the door where he has just entered.

“Spider-Man” Peter mutters as a lame attempt to correct him.

“Peter?” I question and the boy stood in front of me was not who I expected. I didn’t expect the masked vigilante swinging through New York to be someone that I knew.

“Y/N?” He responds, looking even more confused than I am “What are you doing here?”

-

“So Tony Stark is your dad?” Peter asks.

After seeing a guy from your school who you shared a chemistry class with last year, walking into a super-secret meeting for superheroes where he will be now joining your team. It is understandable that Peter and I were now talking this out to figure out how this state could be so small.

“Yep” I answer. We were sat next to each other on bar stools at the kitchen island. Wanda made some of her famous fruit smoothies for us and we were both stirring them around with our straws whilst conversing alone in the main living space.

“But your last name isn’t Stark, or Potts?” He continues, genuinely really confused about this whole situation.

“Yeah, well you can’t have the daughter of a billionaire and superhero couple walking around New York City alone, going to a normal school, having normal hobbies. It’s like asking for me to be taken hostage. So, I don’t have either of their last names and the general public doesn’t know I exist. It’s for my safety” I continue, reciting this memorised answer I’ve had to say to multiple people once they find out my existence.

Peter nodded as if he was understanding everything, he probably was, but I guess this wasn’t the conversation he planned to have today.

“And you’re the great Spider-Man” I continued, wanting the change the subject from me to him. “How did that happen? Wait… were you Spider-Man when you sat behind me in Chem last year?”

He began to explain to me the story, it happened to him on our school trip to OSCORP we took last year for our Chem class that happened just before the end of the semester. Something about a radioactive spider. It was strange, kind of the weirdest superhero transformation story I’ve heard. And I’ve heard quite a few.

My story was nowhere near as interesting. I guess having superhero parents who were always around weird alien technology and contaminated substances led to some weird epigenetic alterations of their reproductive cells and then when they had me, I could turn invisible.

They didn’t know at first, I was seemingly a normal baby. Then at my 2nd birthday party when they surprised me with a freaky clown, I was so scared that my body just decided to turn invisible. They weren’t expecting it, the clown definitely wasn’t expecting it and they had to cover up with a very convincing lie.

From then, whenever I was embarrassed, scared or essentially in a situation where I wanted to disappear. I did. Literally. It wasn’t entirely effective though as even though my body tuned invisible, the clothes I was wearing didn’t. I spent the majority of my preteen years of being a walking hoodie and jeans with no head or hands protruding from the gaps. For my 13th birthday Bruce and I got to work on a suit which responds to the activity of my skin cells, when I was invisible, my suit was invisible. It made it a lot more effective for me to actually be invisible when I turned but it also meant my dad let me start training to become an Avenger.

Training was fun, I worked with Nat a lot in our gym in order to become an efficient fighter. ‘Just because people couldn’t see me, doesn’t mean I shouldn’t know how to serve a mean right hook’ she always said. I also spent a lot of time with Wanda, trying to manage my powers. Now I am able to actually turn invisible and visible again on demand. And it only takes extreme embarrassment now to turn me invisible against my will, which is great because mum and dad finally let me, after my years of begging, attend Midtown High and stop being home school. This is where I met Peter last year and now I’m at Columbia studying genetics and engineering. A double major, I know but when you’re around the top geniuses in the world everyday, there is no such thing as too much learning.

“So, I guess we’re the only Midtown Alumni to have these crazy powers huh?” Peter finishes. After a long ramble about his becoming a superhero story. I guess he wanted to ease the tension after I couldn’t really think of what to say after “that’s super cool”. It wasn’t like I wasn’t interested, I really was, but when I wanted to have another person my age to hang out with, I didn’t expect it to be the boy I spent my senior year of high school obsessing over. I had turned shy, like really shy, like my normal levels of shy times 50. I couldn’t think of what to say.

“Sorry, if that story was too long and boring, I’ve only gotten to tell it to one person before, my best friend Ned so I was kind of excited to be able to tell it again.”

“No, it wasn’t boring, it was genuinely really cool!” I say a little too loudly and enthusiastically. I cringe at my tone of voice and speak normally again as I continue “It’s just I didn’t really expect the new Avengers recruit to be you, you know, like someone I know. It’s just kind of weird, but nice? I don’t know, now I’m rambling”

Peter chuckles.

“Umm, so are you going to be staying with us whilst you train or are you going back to Queens?” I ask, hoping this new question will miraculously erase Peter’s memory of what I last said.

“A bit of both, my Aunt is back in queens and I don’t want to leave her completely alone, but this upstate facility is a little too far for an everyday commute. I’m here just for today but once I start training on Monday, I think I might stay for the whole week.”

“Well, I can give you the tour! Since you’ll be staying with us soon, I guess you’ll want to know where everything is!” I say whilst jumping of my bar stool and putting my half full smoothie cup in the fridge. I noticed peter has just finished his, so I grab the glass and put it in the dishwasher for him. He thanks me as I do so.

“So this is the kitchen, where we make our food, different from the kitchen where the chefs make our food for occasions, charity events blah blah blah. And also, this seating area here is kind of the main seating area where we’ll sit throughout the day. Lots of sofas because there are lots of us and this is Bucky’s armchair. Don’t ever sit in Bucky’s armchair.” I say, stopping behind the chair and resting my hand on the headrest.

“Bucky, scary guy with the metal arm right?” Peter questions whilst following me at a slight distance around the room as I show him around. I nod. “Yeah, don’t worry, I won’t be sitting in his chair” he laughs.

I continue to show him the rest of the complex, the gym, the labs and finish up on the floor with all our rooms.

“I’m not sure which one of these rooms will be yours because we have a couple spare ones, but they all have the same layout. Look I’ll show you mine” I walk into my room, then hold the door open for Peter so he can follow me in.

“Uh, so this is my room. Obviously, yours won’t be decorated like mine but It’ll be the same size and have an en-suite attached with a full shower and tub and stuff. You know, the basics” I say, whilst sitting on the edge of my bed.

“I like your room, it’s cosy” he adds whilst looking around and then heading for the bookshelf as soon as he spots it.

“Ah thanks, I mean it’s cool, bigger than when we were in the tower in the city so I can’t complain” I say whilst also looking around. What is it about someone else being in your room that makes you see it with fresh eyes and make you super self-conscious that there is going to be a rogue piece of underwear on the floor? Even though I know I tidied my room this morning.

“Holy crap, Vision you scared the life out of me” I say on an exhale whilst holding my hand to my chest after the large gasp I just made as he enters the room, through the wall.

“Sorry, but your door is open” He continues, “Mr. Stark has told me that your car is here to take you back home Mr. Parker. If you would just follow me, I can lead you there” Vision continues, as if him just floating through my bedroom wall and speaking to the boy from my chemistry class now turned superhero was a normal thing to happen on a Thursday evening.

“Oh… thanks Vision” Peter says with some hesitancy, you can see that this is a weird circumstance for him too. “Well, I’ll see you on Monday then” he says smiling at me and walking towards the door. Which vision doesn’t use to exit.

“Yeah, see you then” I smile as he closes the door and I’m left in my room listening to him shuffling down the corridor.

Part 2

[zeppelin-and-unicorns]

Fanfic recommendations part four: Missing scenes/Hidden moments

Stories with missing moments from our favorite couple. They are all canon compliant of sorts.

Bad Ass by AdriDee

How Jackie and Hyde are such badasses...especially when it comes about each other. 2 missing scenes between episodes Trampled Under Foot and You Shook Me also, some missing scenes beforeduringafter episode Christmas from season 6.

Complete.

18k words, 7 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Daydreams: Missing Scenes by Bunny1

Missing scenes from some episodes. They’re all very well-written and in character.

There is a post-season 8 chapter, a fix-it, and it’s real cute.

13k words, 25 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Devil’s in the Details by scorpiosun

A series of missing moments - one for every episode of season 5. Because we deserved to see more of Jackie and Hyde behind the scenes.

This story is a WIP.

22k words, 7 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Also Available on AO3

Dolled Up Zen by Weasley’s Revenge

Summer is hot. That's part of the reason she loves it. And the wicked things he can do to her skin with an ice cube. That's definitely an added bonus.

3k words, 3 chapters.

Rated M. Very M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

It Must Be Love by That-Maria-Girl

What happened after the Valentine’s dance.

4k words, 2 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Summer Lovin’ by scorpiosun

Donna and Kelso run to California, leaving behind 4 of their friends...two of which form a bond no one saw coming. Not even themselves. But that doesn't stop them from making the most of it. The story of how Hyde and Jackie got together over the summer between seasons 4 and 5.

79k words, 13 chapters

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Also Available on AO3

Summer The Price is Right by holograma309

The story we didn't get to see: how Jackie and Hyde began dating that summer everyone was in California. Takes place between seasons 4 and 5. Doesn't ignore their earlier storyline. Just trying to fill in the blanks for my favorite couple.

13k words, 8 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

The Love I Need by myboygeorge

Everyone knows when Jackie and Hyde first hooked up. But when did they become lovers? Set as an extension of Season 5's 'Over the Hills and Far Away'.

3k words, 3 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

The Renewal by yabookreader96

Kelso and Donna are away in California. Eric spends his days sleeping in a stupor of self-loathing and depression. Fez meets a new foe, named Fenton. This leaves Steven Hyde and Jackie Burkhart together all summer in the Forman basement. One of many things Jackie and Hyde fans have never gotten is a story for what led up to that fateful kiss on that seemingly normal day. Well...

This story is complete.

71k words, 18 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

One-shots:

Absolutely Better than Pot by galnkay

Steven Hyde has never been one to use the dreaded 'L' word, but he might have to to win her back. Sleeping with nurses and losing your girl can really bring you to your lowest point.

Angsty, but very well written.

1k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

body language by j. alfred prufrock

Of course, it helped that Hyde didn’t pull his hand away and sort of let it rest there with hers.

Jackie and Hyde in the POV of a random person from school.

999 words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Coming Back Around by EnchantedWorlds

"But right now, Jackie really wanted to tell him. Not, that he ever said it back. Apart from that one time in Donna's bedroom, that Jackie would rather not think about, except to remind herself that Steven did love her." [Jackie, Hyde and words that are exchanged once Fez leaves them alone in the basement in 'Down the Road Apiece.']

1k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Country Music by LucyLenn96

After Hyde's disastrous initial meeting with his biological father, Jackie spends some time trying to cheer him up. In the process, she learns something she never knew about him, and he is reminded of just how deep Jackie's affection for him is.

2k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Fireworks and Shooting Stars by Raven33

Takes place right after “I Can’t Quit You, Baby”. Jackie deals with life being complicated. Fluffy as hell.

2k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Five Scenes from Season Five (and one that’s mine) by TeaTimeAllOverTown

Five moments from Jackie and Hyde's relationship in season 5 that we didn't get to see - and one with a new twist on the season's ending.

I know, not 100% canon compliant but... It’s cute and fluffy and everyone should read this.

10k words.

Rated G.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Four Love Confessions Jackie Never Heard by j. alfred prufrock

Or, four times Steven Hyde almost told Jackie Burkhart that he loved her and the one time he did.

2k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Heal This Hurt by kaitiebee89

A flashback of the night Hyde found out Jackie's mother still wasn't home.

5k words.

Rated T. 

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Jekyll and Hyde by Mistiec

The students at Point Place High knew senior year meant changes. They just weren't prepared for how many there actually would be.

6k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Never Gonna be Alone by letmefallasleep

Hyde's thoughts as Jackie lays asleep in his arms after her dad gets arrested, and her mother abandons her. Why does the pygmy sized brunette mean so much to him? Implied past abuse and neglect.

1k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Of Friendship anf Familiarity by zpplnchick

Jackie's hanging out in the basement with the gang and looks around with a sense of contentment. Set shortly after 6x08. Short and fluffy oneshot.

2k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, background Eric/Donna

Picking Battles by nannygirl

In "The Acid Queen" Kitty advises Jackie about 'picking battles' and both Kitty and Jackie end up sending Red and Hyde out to buy some magazines. When Red and Hyde end up meeting at the drugstore, Red has some of his own relationship advice to pass on to Hyde.

3k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Red/Kitty

Picking Petals by scorpiosun

Set during the course of season 6. After Jackie and Hyde get back together, things go relatively smooth for them. And they're happy - mostly. But Jackie can't stop thinking about whether or not Steven really meant it when he said he loved her. And if he did, will he ever say it again? These glimpses into their relationship show her moments of clarity, doubt, and finally, closure.

5k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Also Available on AO3

Plan G From Point Place by c00kiefic

Jackie has urges… Takes place during “I’m Free”.

6k words.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Seven Scenes from Season Seven by TeaTimeAllOverTown

Seven missing scenes from Season Seven. Part 4 of my missing scenes series.

8k words.

Rated G.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Six Scenes from Season Six by TeaTimeAllOverTown

Six Jackie and Hyde scenes from season 6 - filling in their gaps. Canon compliant. A continuation of my missing scenes series.

6k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Six Scenes from Summer by TeaTimeAllOverTown

A collection of Jackie and Hyde scenes from season 4.5 - the ones we never got to see.

9k words.

Rated G.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Summer Fling by mrs.salvatore39

What happened before 'what really happened'. Set during the summer after Kelso and Donna leave for California. Prior 5x02

4k words.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Surprise by SerenitySparrow

Set during the episode when Jackie bakes Hyde some cookies and tries to cheer him up after they learn about Kelso and Angie.

2k words.

Rated M, very M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

The Speech by yabookreader96

When Jackie's friends all blow off her graduation party, she decides that maybe they're not her real friends after all. So when a week passes with no sign of Jackie, they all begin to wonder if they've lost her for good this time. Can amends be made?

1k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

That Whole Sleeping Over Thing by KendraA

Jackie wasn’t letting Hyde pretend to fall asleep before she snuck over." Post-'The Acid Queen' fluff.

4k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Also Available on AO3

Wish You Were Here by zpplnchick

How Hyde may have found out about Jackie's parents abandoning her, and moments following. Set during Season 5, sometime after 5x16.

4k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Without a Friend by EnchantedWorlds

"It's good. Just because it's Jackie. It wouldn't be good, if it wasn't her. It's so fucking good. So of course, it only stands to reason, that he completely fucking torpedoes it." Jackie makes a habit of visiting Hyde at the hotel, when he's at work. Until she doesn't.

2k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

I believe this is all. Feel free to reply to this post if you think I left out a good story!

I’ll repeat this at the end of every single post (seriously, I literally copy and paste this every single time): Speaking as someone who writes, it would be really cool if you guys decide to leave a review (or a comment, if the story is on AO3) in the stories you read, especially the unfinished ones. It really motivates the authors, and receiving a compliment is always a mood lifter. I’ve seen some authors updating stories after years because of nice reviews, so… yeah, this is just an idea.

The next category is probably one of the biggest ones so far: Alternative Universe (canon divergence). Will post it soon!

[alyxia91]

A little distance

I have never in my life attempted to write a fanfic, let alone post it. This is just a little feeler to see if this is something I can actually do. I guess a teaser? This is not proof read and Bakugo is (I think) a bit out of character. I apologize in advance if this is terrible. Also I’m bored at work.

In all the days that you’d known him, Bakugo had been an overly proud, egotistical hothead. You’d attempted to keep his head from flying too far above the clouds, but the consistent praise over how amazing his quirk was had blasted him above them too fast for you to react. You’d never admit it, but while his pride annoyed the ever living hell out of you, you were also proud that he had such a strong quirk - it kept those hero dreams of his very much a possibility.

When your own quirk had presented itself, you learned quickly that it likely wouldn’t be well received...your own mother being horrified to learn that you had a “void” quirk - allowing you to absorb negative feelings and change them into tangible objects of your choosing. It was an incredibly powerful quirk, and one that was difficult to control when it first manifested. You’d been taken out of classes until you learned to control it better, being able to pick and choose the negative emotions now rather than all of them coming to you at once. The drawback to this quirk, was that you retained the emotions rather tan expelling them when you created something. Your councilor had likened it to a “dark empathy”, the ability to feel others emotions, but unable to rid yourself of them.

Because of this, you pulled yourself away from Bakugo, the overwhelming anger that radiated off of him being too much for you to handle as a small child, and the fear of losing yourself in the emotion too strong. When the two of you had gotten accepted into the Hero Program at UA, you worried that you might be overwhelmed again - which you were, but not by Bakugo. Everyone in that class seemed to have trauma in their past, something that made them want to be a hero - something to fight for. While you couldn’t help but be inspired by your classmates, and proud to call them your friends, you also felt yourself becoming increasingly more mentally withdrawn as time passed, keeping yourself at arms length to keep your sanity, and keeping your quirk firmly hidden.

It wasn’t until your encounter with the Hero Killer, Stain, that everything became too much. The aura around him immediately smashing through every mental barrier you had, and the all consuming - and ever growing - rage swallowing you whole. You had been completely paralyzed without even doing anything, Stain not needing to use his quirk on you. As soon as you were close enough, his essence clung to you, scrambling your mind and numbing your senses. He felt it, his anger being pulled away - it had been the first time in years he’d felt some semblance of peace, his mind clear and thoughts almost rational. But he had a job to do, and he’d be damned if a child stopped him.

You remembered nothing leading to the end of the fight, but the moment you saw Ida, Midoriya and Todoroki get hurt, everything suddenly came into hyper-focus.  Pulling on ever dark thought you had, you felt the emotions pool into your fingertips, purple and black smoke falling from them as you thought only of the intense anger and fear you felt. Around you, a twisting storm of deep purple fog settled on the ground, skeletal hands and bodies being created and pulling themselves upward from seemingly nowhere. As many as you needed, you told yourself, to protect my friends. Standing behind you, an army of (really rather creepy) purple and black skeletal spirits stood, focus locked on Stain. A ripple of fear shot through his heart to the ends of every limb;  ‘What the hell...what is this?!’ His body screamed at him to run, to get the hell away. Each spirit seemed to carry with them the weight of his past, all the anger, hurt, fear and disappointment that had haunted him his entire life. Quite literally, it felt as though he was facing his demons.

“I will give you one chance” you said, voice eerily calm “ you let my friends go, to stop killing heroes. This isn’t the way to get what you want”

“What do you know about what I want” Stain raged, voice tight with either fear or anger, you couldn’t tell

“I know everything. I’ve felt everything. Your anger, your hatred. You want heroes to be what they used to be - good people with the ability to help. Right?” You’re met with silence, but you notice his muscles tensing, the grip on his swords firming. Instead of answering, he lunged at you, no longer aiming to simply paralyze you. This lunge was to kill.

Throwing your arms forward, your spirits flew past you, swarming him midair and stopping his attack. Black and purple clouded his vision, only the broken faces of the skulls surrounding him keeping him from falling. Screams invaded his ears, visions of his past flying passed him too fast to really grasp. Suddenly the wind was knocked out of him, your face mere inches from his own. When did you get here? When had he landed on the ground? Why were you looking at him like that? Why can’t he freaking MOVE. What the hell was happening. You stood in front of him, ignoring the screams and faces swirling around you two, your hair whipping around you, the feeling the only thing keeping you grounded. You watched as his eyes flew in every direction, desperately trying to find something to look at other than you. Reaching out, you placed your hands on either side of his head, pulling his face and eyes to look directly into yours. You saw the broken pieces of his life hidden behind years of building disappointment and anger in his. In yours, he saw the same thing reflected, but behind that still was undeniable hope. He couldn’t think, he could barely breathe. Suddenly, the cloud surrounding the two of you dissipated, and you threw yourself backwards. Suddenly pain shot through him, a punch landing on the left side of his face, and a strong kick landing directly at his ribcage on his right side; then nothing.

As soon as you got away, you fell to your knees. You’d never used your quirk in that way before; you didn’t even know it was possible. But God, you had been so angry...so scared. You felt your nose bleeding, your body not yet strong enough to handle a release that sudden or powerful. Todoroki was next to you in an instant, asking if you were okay. You couldn’t hear him, only make out the words leaving his lips. Shaking your head, you felt yourself draw in a shaky breath before collapsing.

A dull white ceiling came into view, soft beeping pulling you out of your comfortable nothingness. Blinking, you tried to bring the world into focus, brain still foggy from sleep. Pulling yourself up, you peered around the room. TO your surprise, Bakugo was sleeping in a chair to your left, head resting against the window. To your right, you saw Ida, Midoriya and Todoroki, all sitting up in their hospital beds. “You’re awake” Ida smiled, relief washing over his face “you scared us there” “How long was I out?” “Two days. It took a lot out of you, what you did” Todoroki answered, heterochromatic eyes looking you over “it was amazing to see” he added quietly. “I’ve known you for years, I never knew you could do that” Midoriya mumbled, the smallest hint of sadness in his eyes. “It wasn’t something I tried to hide Deku, I didn’t know my quirk could do that either...”  “What a time to learn something like that. I’m shocked. You seemed like you knew exactly what you were doing” Ida remarked, wonder dancing across his face “I assure you, I didn’t. I honestly don’t remember thinking at any point...it was all insticntual” Ida opened his mouth to respond, but a loud crack stopped him. Turning to your left, you saw Bakugo awake, glaring daggers at you. ‘Well, I’m in trouble’ you thought, eyes widening slightly at the anger, but also the fear rolling off of him. “Do you have ANY idea what could have happened to you?! You went head-to-head with the freaking HERO KILLER and used something you didn’t even know you HAD? Are you STUPID?!” he roared, face turning red and he glared at you “Why does it matter Bakugo? I’m fine, everyone else is fine, right?” “It matters because you could have DIED you idiot!” “You weren’t even there! How do you even know what happened?” “Deku told Kirishima, he told me. I came here.” Simple. “And you came here for me? Why?” he paused. “Can I talk to her alone” The other three nodded, Ida and Todoroki helping Midoriya out.

“Why did you stop talking to me” he asked the moment the door closed “What?” “We were always together. Partners in crime. Then you left, you came back, and avoided me. Why” “Bakugo...” “No. I deserve to know why. You were my best friend. Why” “Bak -” “Why” “I can’t -” “Why” “It’s not that sim-” “Make it simple” “I don’t -” “WHY” he exploded, sparks flying out of the palms of his hands. He trembled, the anger rolling off of him changing to such strong sadness you couldn’t help but feel guilty. “I couldn’t do it” you whispered “What?” “Do you know what why quirk does” you asked, eye raising to meet his. “Not exactly, but I know is affects emotions. I was able to pick up that much at least” “It feed off them. Negative ones specifically. I absorb them, take them as my own, and can manipulate them into tangible things -- I don’t know what limits there are in that though” you paused, waiting for a sign he was following. A simple nod was all you got. “When I do make something from them, the emotions don’t leave me. They stay, and I have to figure out how to deal with them. I was pulled because I couldn’t control WHEN I absorbed those emotions, so any negative emotion that was felt around me, I immediately took in...” You watched as a flicker of realization flashed in his eyes, His body slumped down into the chair, eyes never leaving yours. “You were always so angry... I didn’t know how to deal with it. I couldn’t. Not at that age -” “Why didn’t you tell me” “I didn’t know how to. How do you tell a child to stop being angry? You can’t. You can barely control your anger now Baku” “I could learn to if it meant -” he started to whisper, stopping himself before he revealed too much “If it meant...what?” you pried “Nothing” “No no, I answered your question, you answer mine” “Not a chance. I deserved to know” “And I don’t?” “No. Not after that stunt you pulled” “Bakugo” “Piss off. I’m not telling you shit” “Baku” “No” “Please” “No” he resigned himself, crossing his arms and straightening up in his chair. Signing, you smiled softly. “Stubborn as ever. I’m glad you’re still you” “Well who the hell else would I be?” “People change as they get stronger, you know that. I’m glad that you haven’t changed too much” “Not like you would know...” he mumbled to himself, but you caught it “...it wasn’t easy, you know. Distancing myself from you. My instinct has always been to run to you when anything happens. It was hard to fight that...” “You shouldn’t have. I would have learned how to deal with the anger. I would have helped you” “At that age?” “You were my best friend. I would have tried” “...I’m sorry” “Yeah yeah, sort your shit out you dumbass. And stop running from me. You’re stuck with me now, I’m not letting you do something stupid like that again. You’re gonna learn to control that shit” “How, exactly?” “Dunno, but we’re gonna figure it out” “We?” “Yes ‘we’ you idiot. Like I said, you’re stuck with me. I’m not getting another call that you’ve landed yourself in the hospital. I’m not doing this shit again....it’s too much” he whispered the last part, so soft it barely made it to your ears. "I’ll let you rest, let me know when you’re out of here” Standing up, Bakugo stretched his back, arms raising above his head to extend towards the ceiling. Sighing as he brought them down, he walked towards the door, not sparing you a glance. Half way to the door he paused, turning around suddenly and marching up to you. Bending down, he placed a soft kiss on your forehead, a blush painting its way across his cheeks. “Don’t scare me like that again. I don’t know what I would do if you died” he whispered, standing upright to march out of the room. He didn’t bother to wait for your reaction, too embarrassed to turn back.

If he had, he would have seen the matching blush painted across your face, a beautiful and soft smile gracing your lips. “I care about you too...” you said to yourself. Maybe distancing yourself from him had not been the right call...

[elai-okonma]

Ch.1 With A Broken Heart

Word count: 2,125 Fem!MC

Here’s the first chapter of my very first Obey Me! fanfic!! I really hope you all enjoy it! I posted the link to my AO3, but I wanted to share it here, too! ^.^

WARNINGS: Violence, Death, Betrayal, Angst, Heartbreak, etc.    SUMMARY: [Belphie kills MC and her soul goes up to the Celestial Realm, a few months later she pays the brothers a visit.]

 ...my mind is starting to go blank... Belphegor is on top of you with his hands squeezing your neck hard, body sore from all the abuse it was going through.

  "You humans really are foolish, idiotic, weak creatures, aren't you?"

Your writhing underneath him only fuels his fire as he picks you up by your neck and slams you into the attic door, causing you to tumble down the stairs. Once you reach the bottom, Belphegor picks you up by your hair and drags you to the main area of the house. Just then, the brothers walk in and what they see shakes them to their core. A bloody and bruised human, in a daze as your head bobbles around in Belphegor's grasp, your neck of no use to you anymore.

  "MC!" You hear Mammon scream,  his eyes wide at the sight of you.

  Before Lucifer and the others could do anything, Belphegor's hand shoots up to your neck and with one final squeeze he crushes your windpipe with a sickening crunch. Everything goes black as you let out a gargling sound, before Belphie lets his grip of your hair go. You rag doll to the ground, neck crumpled like a paper cup.

  "NO!! MC!!"...

_____________________________________________________

"MC?""MC can you hear me??"

Your eyes fly open, heart threatening to burst out of your chest as you gasp for air.

"Hey there, it's ok, you're ok." 

Such a beautiful voice, you think to yourself. You look around, afraid to move your head. Everything is so bright. It takes a moment to adjust your eyes, but when they finally focus you glance to your right and notice what looks like an Angel sitting besides you. Your eyes go wide as he comes into your view.

  "Hello, MC."

It was an Angel! His halo a soft white, and his wings bigger than you'd expected, fully outspread to embrace you. So soft.

"What's going on??" You question with a shaky voice.

"My dear, you have passed. You're in the Celestial Realm." He says with a small smile. 

"I don't understand?? Why did I come here?? 

"Why because your soul is pure, of course! All pure souls come up here."  The Angel says, pleased by his answer. 

[Memories from right before your death come flooding back to you.] 

"Belphie! He-! HE BETRAYED ME! HE KILLED ME!!!!" You scream, tears coming to your eyes. 

"He is a Demon after all. It is in their nature." The Angel states matter of factly.

  You shake your head at this, "No, but- I trusted him.. I just wanted to help him. He was so sad being stuck in the attic.." Your tears come full force now. The Angel takes you in his arms and you cry out. 

"Lucifer, Mammon, Asmo, Levi, Satan, Beel.. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for leaving you. I-.. I should have listened. I wasn't ready to die!  There was so much more I wanted to experience with all of you!" You cry. 

"So pure...this is why you're here." The Angel whispers into your hair.

  After a few minutes you stop crying and look up at the Angel full on for the first time. He was breathtaking, to say the least. He had on similar clothing to Simeon, and had green eyes--the kind of green that reminded you of a jade bracelet. His skin was like porcelain, and he had long black hair that went down to his hips. All you could do was stare in awe. I mean, the Demon brothers were stunningly handsome, and drop dead sexy but this Angel was, how should you put it...heavenly?? [Pun intended] 

"Is there a way I can go back??" You blurt out. Embarrassed and confused by your own words. I mean, you were literally in Heaven and you were asking to back to the Devildom?? 

The Angel chuckles at this. Of course you'd want to go back, even after everything that happened. You loved the Demon brothers, it was no secret even up here in the Celestial Realm. 

"It is possible. But not for some time. You have to realize that you have passed, which means that your physical body is no more. You are an Angel now..." The Angel trails off. 

"An Angel?? But-"

The Angel interjects "...You need to understand that it's no easy thing, being an Angel. Humans don't usually get this opportunity, but this is what Father wanted, so this is what's to happen... With that being said, if you still wish to go back to the Devildom then sacrifices will have to be made." 

You stare at him, taking in his words. Then your eyes go wide with excitement and fear. He said Father, as in God?? God said himself that you were to be an Angel?! Your mind is still trying to process this information when the Angel speaks up again. 

"I'm Elai, by the way. I realize that I hadn't yet introduced myself. I apologize. Now, if you don't have anymore questions then we should be on our way. We have a lot to cover." 

With that, he takes your hand and you both teleport to a room that looked like one of those suites you'd get at the Palms in Vegas.  Everything was white and gold marble. 

"This will be your room, MC. Feel free to get comfortable, there's a change of clothes in the closet. When you're done, come downstairs and I shall meet you."

"Thank you, Elai. I'll be down shortly." You thank him and he takes his leave. You close the door and breathe in deeply. After locating where your closet is you open in and step inside--It's a walk-in!--All on the hangars are Celestial robes, along with other types of clothing and accessories, on the bottom shelves were shoes. The clothing is gorgeous but ugh why is everything white??

  "I know I shouldn't expect anything other than white here but, really??" You say out loud to yourself. 

You reach out to touch one of the robes and, just as if it can feel your distaste to the color, it changes to black. Your eyes almost pop out of your skull.

  "OH FUCK YES, NOW THIS IS WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT!"

You go through the rest of the closet--touching shoes, hats, scarves, gloves and everything else that could be turned black. With a satisfied smile you start piecing together your outfit: a black, full length turtleneck dress with the shoulders cut out--similar to Simeon's. It's also cut out in a crisscross pattern down the middle of your torso to expose your chest, cleavage, and stomach. It has slits up the sides that stop at your hips, and you pair the dress with some thigh high stilettos and some gold jewelry. You brush your hair out and head for the door. 

Downstairs, Elai is patiently waiting your arrival. As soon as he sees you he's laughing. He's not at all surprised by your outfit--he's heard enough about you from others to know your a little child of darkness--You come clacking up to him and he takes you outside. 

"First we'll establish your wings. It'll take you a little while to get used to having them. You'll also need to learn how to use them. They're used for more than just flying, you know." Elai's wings come out to demonstrate. "See, your wings are gonna be your best friend. They can be used for flying, feathers as weightless as air-" He flaps his wings once and he floats off the ground. "-or..they can be used to protect you." In an instant his wings wrap around him, the feathers hardening something akin to metal, as he comes back down to the ground with a weighted clanking sound. 

Your mouth is wide open, you never knew Angel wings could do THAT.

"Shall we start with bringing your wings out?? The easiest way to do that would be to simply imagine them coming out of your back, from in between your shoulder blades. Shall we try??" 

You swallow, then look at him with determined eyes. Nodding, you look down to the ground. You close your eyes and imagine a set of wings coming out of your back just how Elai explained. Just then, your back haunches over and your shoulder blades protrude out. You feel this immense pain like a burning and pinching sensation and it makes you let out a shrill scream. You drop to your hands and knees and then after a moment you hear a flapping sound--your wings are out! They come around to the front when you reach out to touch them, and it's the softest thing you've ever felt in your life. You stand back up and look over to Elai. 

"On your first try?! I'm impressed, MC!" The Angel beams. "Oh and by the way, the pain of you felt is only for the first time you bring them out, you'll feel it again when they retreat. And then afterwards it won't hurt. You'll be able to summon them with no issue!" 

You give him a small smile, after all the pain you endured before your death, this was minor in comparison. (It did still hurt though). 

"I want to fly!" You shout in excitement, eyes lighting up.

 Elai smiles and shakes his head. So eager. His wings flap a few times and then he's off the ground. 

"C'mon then." He says.

You give your wings a couple of small test flaps, getting the feel for them. Then, with a couple of big flaps you feel yourself lift off of the ground. The feeling makes you so giddy you actually let out a shriek. With a few more hard pushes of your wings you get higher and higher.

'It feels like I'm deep sea diving, except without the water pressure. The way, when you're under the water, you just float still. Time seemingly stopped. Suspended and weightless. That's what it feels like flying, and the sensation is so overwhelming--' Your thoughts interrupted when Elai asks:

"How about a race, MC??" 

"You're on!" Feeling your competitive nature coming out. 

With that, Elai is gone. All that's left is the wind trail from his wings. You laugh and follow the trail, observing the pressure change in the air from where he's been. When you catch up to him, you stick out your tongue in a teasing manner, then speed past him. He's surprised but not totally caught off guard. ______________________________________________________________

~~Later on that night, after you've finished your shower, you head down to get some dinner. When you walk into the kitchen, for a split second you thought you saw Beel. Your heart sunk when you realize that it was just a ghost of a memory you were having. Beel was always in the kitchen, always in the fridge or cabinets looking for something to eat. You wondered how he was doing. How all of the brothers were doing. Did they know you were up here in the Celestial Realm?? You feel tears welling in your eyes when Elai walks in. 

"Oh, MC! What's wrong??" 

You wipe your eyes and clear your throat. "I was just thinking about Beelzebub, and the others...Do they know I'm here??" 

"They do not. They have no knowledge of your spirit coming here. They think that when Belphegor killed you, he killed your soul as well." 

Even more tears start welling up in your eyes. You just couldn't understand why Belphie did what he did. Of course he hated humans but you loved him. Even if it was for a short while, you loved him and all of the brothers. More than you loved yourself. 

"I loved them, you know?? I loved them and in the end I was the one who payed the price for it. And still, even after all that happened, I still want nothing more than to see them. ...Including Belphie..." 

The Angel looks at you with a soft expression. "Well, I did tell you that it was possible to go back. You're an Angel now, after all. Patience. In time you'll be able to see them. I promise." 

You hug him, then head back to your room hungry, too depressed to eat. ________________________________________________________

~~In your room, as you're laying in bed crying, you summon your wings out to cocoon you. You imagine them being Lucifer's wings, and the thought calms you down a bit. 

"I'll be seeing you guys real soon...Please be ok..." And with that, you slip into a restless sleep, filled with night terrors. In the morning, you'll find that you have been summoned by none other than God himself.

[wromwood]

📓?

"Hey, here's a fun new game. Put "📓" or some other version of a book emoji into my inbox and I'll explain the plot of a fanfiction that I haven't written but daydream about."

Ohhh boy, you're in for it now.

You see, right now, I've mainly got original fiction ideas floating around my skull. But there is actually one fanfic idea that's currently making its rounds in there. A fanfic idea that I know I won't write because I don't think anybody here knows the book series it's based off of-- the Samuel Johnson trilogy-- and because I'm too busy with other things.

This fanfic idea was created because I found the last two installments of this series-- the third book of its trilogy and a relatively recent short story-- to be a bit unsatisfying. (The third book definitely has issues. The sort of issues where I need to say "OK, look, perhaps you should know something before you pick up the third book..." to people who want to read the trilogy. Hit me up if you want to read this series for yourself so you can be warned)

And so, without context and what are probably major spoilers, I will briefly cover what would happen in this fanfic. (Spoiler warning for the Samuel Johnson trilogy by John Connolly)

It would pick up on something established in the post-trilogy short story that wasn't really elaborated on- the fact that Samuel (the protagonist) and his friend/love interest Maria tried doing a magic act together. Maria asks Samuel why he got the sudden interest in magic in the first place, as it WASN'T ESTABLISHED IN THE MAIN TRILOGY. Samuel would answer that he took it up because in a strange way, it makes him feel closer to Nurd, his absent demon friend. Despite Hell's attempted invasion of Earth (and of Samuel's own transportation to Hell) technically happening via the manipulation of science, Samuel can't help but view the events of his book trilogy as a strange sort of magic. In his own way, he wants to explore the connections between magic and science, and how one can be more like the other. Learning the tricks of stage magic, while definitely far from the actual topic at hand, is a fun way for him to think about it while also impressing others. (Despite his own skills being very unimpressive.)

Maria finds this sweet and wishes Samuel well before she leaves. She's totally unaware that once she's gone, Samuel takes out a book that is covered in runes and teeming with energy. Samuel tells himself that he's only trying to educate himself, that it isn't necessarily DEMONIC, that he's not trying to mess with things he doesn't understand. At least, not without a good reason....

Meanwhile, Samuel's friend Nurd is continuing his sightseeing trip across the multiverse with his fellow demonic traveling companions. He's surprised to see what looks like evidence of human life in universes where there should be none at all. At first, he thinks he's being paranoid and "homesick" about Earth. After all, anything could look like a human footprint. Or human clothing. Or the remains of a human settlement? Something strange is happening in the multiverse, and unfortunately for Nurd, he's stumbled upon quite the mystery....

Finally, in our C story, we see the return of the traveling acting troupe of little people whose group name is sort of up in the air, for the most part, considering how it was unfortunately and accidentally changed to Dan's SODS in book 3. This section is devoted to the actors realizing that they've driven their manager Dan into a deep depression, seemingly sucking out all of his previous optimism and kindheartedness. The four of them promise to find a way to revitalize their manager, as SOMEONE in the group needs to be the moral compass and ray of sunshine, and it certainly won't be any of them. As they try to not resort to their casual lives of crime and mischief, they encounter a self insert character of me who is purely there to say "Trans rights", because goddamn, I need someone to say "Trans rights" after something that happens in book 3.

And that's about all that's been "planned" out. Obviously, I don't think anyone is interested in seeing this completed, and I have no plans to do so because of my other projects. Still, the first two books of the original trilogy mean a lot to me, and I care about a bunch of these characters. It'll be a while before this fanfic idea stops floating around my head.

Hopefully you don't regret sending this ask!

[gaulemtypefemale-dm-l-016]

3d, 5d and 5n? :)

3d. Rank the endings (for one game of your choice or the true endings of the 3 games)

In terms of all games, I think I would rank 999 ending > VLR ending > ZTD ending.

However, each one of them gave me a different experience so I really enjoy them as a whole package. For example, when I finished VLR, I felt I needed more. The experience had been so intense that I wanted to play ZTD right away. On the other hand, ZTD's true ending made me feel very introspective, even if the writting felt lacking sometimes.

I ranked 999's ending higher because I feel like 999, in general, felt more concise and it had my favourite cast. I loved the epilogue and how the game could simply end there and not even have a sequel. It felt like a complete game by itself. Of course I was a bit desperate with the situation between Akane and Junpei, and how they ended up in separate ways, but it felt fitting.

As for VLR I really enjoyed the plot twist. I felt the true ending was a bit too long, like a never ending ride, but, despite the confusion, I enjoyed the general explanation of it. I also enjoyed the sad tone of the story, and I absolutely loved some of the reflections from the another time (even if not considered as canon).

However, the game asked for more.

And there's where ZTD enters. I had some problems getting used to the cinematics of the game and the characters, and, at the time I played, some things felt weird, like how suddenly it seemed so simple to just shift. As for the ending, I really like how it was put as a moral dilemma, a ZERO TIME DILEMMA, in fact, the situation of shifting (not sure if to think that the shifting until then had been made too easy, or it was purposedly used so that only later they had to face the fact that they doomed their other selves). The ending made me think a lot about how, despite them being alive at the end, despite this seemingly good turn of events, it still felt all like a gamble, as the begining of the game. In the end we didnt' even know the identity of the terrorist, and they still doomed their first ending iteration, for their last iteration (which has the trauma from playing the decision game).

Delta's character is generally a source of memes due to his quotes, but his words still left some marks. His whole plan was convoluted. It's almost like the second nonary game, but here the multiple timelines had to happen in order for this future to come true, and for him and Phi to exist.

I also love the ending theme and it plays very well, complementing this interminable dilemma mood the characters live through. I also love how, in the end, we can interpret Delta as a character portraying the player: "One of Delta's motivations for creating the Decision Game: he can't shift himself, but can read the minds of those who experienced other timelines, and was interested in learning about them. Given that Delta is technically the Player Character, this is probably a meta-narrative commentary on player curiosity" (taken from ZTD TV tropes).

So in the end this was all to say that, despite liking 999's ending better for how solid it seemed to me, the other games' endings also deserve a lot of credit for their worth.

(I didn't know the ranking was for the endings of all games or one in specific so I went with this, but I may try to rank for a specific game later).

5d. Do you consider Another Time to be canon? If so, do you have any theories on ?'s identity

I think at the time I finished ZTD I found that Another Time was not considered canon. Nevertheless I really liked its contents so I like to pick elements from it and incorporate in canon. One of my favourite part of it is Tenmyouji’s thoughts on this plan of jumping to the past and change it. The bikers’ story is one of my favourites there and I felt it was a message about how, despite losing Akane, he found Quark along his journey in this doomed timeline, and how, even if their plan works, this timeline still exists. There is also a possibility that the transporter was hinted with Alice and Clover’s conversation, but not sure if that was the alternative or not.

About ?’s identity, I think my favourite take is the player. Because the player is an irregular identity in the game. To get the Another Time, the player has to achieve certain goals, such as collecting the golden files. The player can play with timelines as much as they want since they can jump through the flowchart freely and they even command Sigma’s action through the game (which can explain the way sometimes he was surprised with his vote during the Nonary Game). And I believe it refers to the player coming from the true ending of ZTD, but this is merely speculation...

Since Delta could be meta commentary about the player, I also liked to think he could be involved in this, but since he can’t shift , it’s much improbable. However I like how there is a link with how the end of ZTD is Carlos pointing the gun at him, which represents a situation of danger that could trigger a shift.

Other than this, I think I haven’t thought much about it. I may have read some theories some time ago, but I don’t remember them now...

5n. Do you have any fanart/fanfic/fangame recommendations?

Fanart is probably what I consume the most. I really love @/keycrash’s works, @/kisschasey’s portraits of Snake, @/caelytrix, the way @/aestheticcannibal portrays Kyle and Dio, @/i0n4 and much more artists. I always try to reblog the amazing works I find from the fandom and sorry for not listing more, nor any work in specific.

Twitter is also a very good media to find a lot of good ZE fanarts. Not all of them are tagged, but generally searching the ZeroEscape tag allows you to find very cool works, along with other tweets and memes.

Now, on fanfiction I can’t really give much recommendations because I haven’t read many. I mainly read some from Zecret Santa event. I remember enjoying the one I got about Tenmyouji and Quark because I really love their wholesome relationship. Link here

There’s also one I once started to read but didn’t finish due to lack of time, but which was VLR’s story told from Phi’s POV and I found the idea extremely interesting although I still haven’t read it. It’s pretty long too. Link here

Now for an idea which concept I feel it’s funny and interesting: I once found one that was a Nonary game in the IKEA. I actually haven’t read it but at the time I thought it was a really funny idea. Link here

I’ve only read the first recommendation, but thought I should leave the other two, as they seem interesting and funny.

Sorry for the long post and the delay in replying. I also apologize for any mistake I made. I’m a bit tired but I really wanted to finish this post.

And thank you for the asks. I really enjoyed the question about Another Time and, although I’m pretty bad at ranking things, I like discussing and going through the games’ content again.

[feather-dancer]

Trollhunters Fanfic Recommendations - Part 3

Somehow there is now a third one of these because I read far far too much fanfic and have no regrets about it. It’s with great pleasure I can also announce I’ve been digging around for Trans Jim fics and found some gems while I was at it that have been included below.

You can find Part 1 of my fanfic recommendations here!

And Part 2 here!

Plus one shameless plug for my own current fics.

General Trollhunters

(And you're my Arcadia.) - All you need to know is it’s Jilaire post Season 3 and one line in particular made me burst out laughing.

Bitter[sweet] - Sometimes the thing you need most is just a really good friend when your body plain sucks. Contains Trans Jim and is delightful.

the red book - Far beyond the humble days of Season 3 and after living beyond his human family and friends, Jim has started to forget who he was and that he was ever just a human kid.

The Halls of Arcadia High - When Strickler disappeared in Season 1, his absence was felt in many ways even in the form of a humble piano left un-played.

Not - Not!Enrique isn’t his name yet it’s what they call him anyway. An albatross reminding him of what was taken before he even had a chance to start.

On the Radio  - The final telling of the Janus Order.

Gay stories for Tales of Arcadia - Yeah I’m pretty sure you can guess where this is going, LGBTQ+ rep!

Through the Fires - There was a before time, one where Gunmar still roamed free and Deya had yet to be chosen let alone felled. These are the words of the humble witnesses of that war, from the changelings to the trolls who would oppose them.

Trollhunters: A Series of Disjointed Drabbles - This is so cute and fluffy I might just spontaneously combust.

Insomnolence - It is after the final battle and Jim has a lot of thoughts.

another tragedy - Anxiety is a bastard, it gives a lot of bad thoughts but sometimes there is a little bit of truth buried beneath it all and it whispers all about how you can keeping doing the wrong things for the right reasons. Season 2.

i will always hold you close (but i will learn to let you go) - Sometimes the hardest thing you can do is learning when to let go. Sometimes however, even when you want to they hold back even tighter. Season 2.

your eyes look like coming home - Toby has been the witness from the start of just how close Jim has been to death multiple times over and how Jim he is about the whole thing. It scares him how this time might be it, again and again. Season 2.

The Collected Tellings of Shigir and Other Changeling Folktales - I don’t actually know which category to put this under so I’m going the to heck with it route instead. Does exactly what it says on the tin for your Changeling lore needs, some of which will be off-hand mentioned or outright appear during the fantastic Terpsichore - The Comedy of the Danse Macabre - ACT I.

Please note: The main fic is Stricklake if that’s not your cup of tea, the folktales however can be enjoyed regardless.

~~~

Stricklake

all that dazzling dawn has put asunder - The sequel to in my sleep i dreamed of waking, this is filled with delightful fluff, internal panicking and the joys of trying to explain how you’re a not and how that does not change the fact Strickler is still a was. Being a changeling in these strange after times are difficult even before the other baggage involved but at least you're still here to start.

Two Pisces in Alto Mare - When in Rome as part of a study trip abroad, you meet the most curious people sometimes and  by fluke or nature you may even do so more than once.

Filling The Gaps - Possibly a bit of an unusual mention but! These are little pieces of Fallout that were going on while our eyes were following elsewhere and boy it can hurt.

Rehearsals and DvD Bonus Features - Another from the home of Terpsichore - The Comedy of the Danse Macabre - ACT I which is being listed here because it does have Stricklake in it. Some things don’t make the cut with writing fanfic, either because the plot wandered off, it doesn’t fit right or it’s some backstory you haven’t quite figured out where it can be naturally brought up yet and in this case they’ve found themselves a home. Be warned, one particular chapter is explicit and has been marked as such in warnings in the chapter summary.

~~~

Alternate Universes

(Un)Becoming - Not technically an AU in the conventional sense but I’m putting it under here anyway. It’s Unbecoming, as ever the road to hell is paved with good intentions but as Jim threw in the towel the storm that’s coming will not be stopped. However, what if others caught glimpses of a world that still had a human Trollhunter to defend it?

Steve the Kind - Steve became the Trollhunter but how the adventure unfolds differently than when Jim was at the helm might just surprise you. Very slow burn Steve and Jim that in a rather refreshing change doesn’t throw Claire under the bus for it to happen. Praise be.

31 Days in the Darklands - Strickmar that somehow kinda works?? It helps with Gunmar having the space to breathe outside of getting Morgana out and be more of his own character. Storywise, in order to rescue Jim from the Darklands Strickler broke a deal that would cost his own freedom and now has to somehow maintain a treaty between three very different factions all the while keeping his own neck intact. The intense distrust in changelings continues on to boot but hey, nobody said politics was easy.

Building Bridges - So Gunmar is distinctly of the more Eldritch variety with dream powers, the ability to easily see through lies for the true emotions and thoughts, Bular has the Insight as well to a lesser extent and everyone has somehow managed to hop onto Stricklander’s bandwagon of we must protect Jim Lake Jr. at all costs. Now the race is on as both sides try to sway the young Trollhunter to their way of thinking and the Trollmarket has no idea how dangerously badly they’re doing so far.

Lost Souls - A fic written in variable snapshots. Jim was kidnapped and changed by Merlin far earlier to be his Champion to ensure he did the “right thing” while Barbara in desperation to find her son falls into the hands of Morgana thus mother and son become enemies without even realising it.

Faithfully - Barbara died overseas and yet somehow Jim still managed to make his way back to Arcadia to become the next Trollhunter. This road is far harder for it as a seemingly homeless orphan though on the flipside he keeps on acquiring dads. Contains Trans Jim, timeline variable snapshots and I love it very much.

The Burning - There was a fire, it killed Barbara and Jim was thought dead as well. Nobody could have guessed the feral half changeling that is running around like a cryptid is the very much alive Jim.

Finding Daylight - Jim is a very low ranking changeling, terrified of Bular and his home amounts to little more than a spot in the woods. Things started to go pear shaped for him when he accidentally stumbled over Blinky and only more so when the amulet picks him after Kanjigar is felled. Tis not a kind world for a changeling child out there and he has nobody really to help watch his back until he stumbles on a potential maybe.

~~~

The bonus shoutout for an excellent MSA fic   

A Sleep Like Death - Who wouldn’t want to go visit a tower you’ve inherited apparently and has haunted as all hell all over it? Not Vivi that’s for sure. Poor Arthur is just along for the ride and then things start to get really weird when they find it’s still occupied and thinks Arthur is his jailor.

[anangelicday-mrwolf]

Wolfsbane : Noblesse Fanfic (post-ending)

(previous chapter)

Chapter 48 – Much More Dangerous Than They Had Envisioned

“Welcome.”

The doctor greeted Tao and M-21 as soon as their shoes tapped past KSA’s front door.

The two men were donned in their signature black suit, the uniform of school guards and RK.

Yet unlike before, their shoulders were heavy with frigid atmosphere oh-so-visible-and-tangible.

The doctor felt nothing, although the situation was more than enough to make him feel disappointed that they are being icy to him.

He knew he was in no position to throw such emotional tantrum.

As for Tao and M-21, they could see.

They could see from the doctor’s superficially well-mannered attitude that he was very inclined to greet them with Taesik as well but could not.

It is late night, with most personnel of KSA back at home. However, words will surely spread once even a single soul spots how both KSA’s director and doctor are groveling at someone at the door, and it would be only a matter of time until every soul figures out that something is going on in their nest.

As much as they are ninety-nine-point-nine-nine-percent sure what the circumstances are all about, they did not want the lesser people to find out before the remaining 0.01% is completely mapped.

Also, in consideration of the weight of the circumstances, it was only natural for them to remain cautious until the very last moment.

“Would you like to go there now...?”

Usually he would have been referring to the director’s office. But this time he meant otherwise, and they did not need to exchange words to know that.

The purpose of Tao and M-21’s visit lay in Yuhyung’s lab.

Tao insisted they search the place before its owner returns to Korea, which gave them only a night to carry out the task.

For that reason the doctor did not wait for their response, although he did ask for it.

Which is why the waiting time inside the ascending elevator could not possibly be more awkward and stifling.

Which was only natural for the doctor to try to let in some air to the murky atmosphere expected only at the runway towards the battlefield.

“Uh... By the way, is there something up with Mr. Takio?”

M-21 started upon the name of his teammate, and Tao followed suit by rolling his eyes in a curious fashion.

Takio was tending to his duty outside during the time they were unveiling most of Yuhyung’s secret at company of Lunark.

When they decided they should head to KSA, he did not hesitate to volunteer as well.

To their concern and puzzlement, he was nowhere to be seen, but they could not afford to wait for him.

At last they made it to Yuhyung’s lab, enclosed by a new alloy door that replaced the one that Yeonsu stomped on.

The doctor unlocked the room with his employee key card, and Tao and M-21 held their breath as they directed their scrutinizing gaze into the dark lab.

Overall, it was basically a replica of the scenes the two men had familiarized themselves with during their times at Union.

But of course, there was a difference in size and magnificence, probably because of difference in resources.

Soon enough their hands got busy as they committed themselves in heated search through desks, drawers, and bookshelves for what they could spy with their eyes.

Which did not surrender anything, to nobody’s surprise.

“Yes, this happens to be an official research content we are running at the moment.”

They wasted their time asking for doctor’s confirmation with the documents, graphs, and printed screenshots they could pick up, to ultimately return them to their original places.

Naturally their eyes were drawn to the computer in slumber.

“Do you think he left something if anything in there? Based on the series of testaments, he may be a hopeless clown in daily life, but even you admit that he is no ordinary person when it comes to research.”

“He must have. Computer-friendly’s that practically treat computers as equal to their flesh and bones – yes, the sort like me – tend to leave in one way or another the most important data inside their computers. Partially because our pride depends on how well we build the firewalls and vaccine programs against potential thefts or leaks.”

Tao quoted with a voice close to desperation than confidence.

After he pushed the button to awaken the computer, they came to think that perhaps Yuhyung added a feature that automatically detonates his computer when it is turned on during his absence.

Which is why for the 3 seconds of waiting their heads whirred with thousands of scenarios, of which none was brought into reality, to their mild astonishment.

Notwithstanding, the very first screen that welcomed them froze them in their shoes.

“Password...?”

They could not understand how they could forget.

Even outside the industry of espionage or secret intelligence, in modern world personal information is held as valuable as a common gold mine, and it is only customary for people to lock their computers with personal passwords.

The fact that they were staring at none other than Yuhyung’s computer fanned their anxiety.

“...I think I’ve seen the similar kit at Union. No, this isn’t a repertoire exclusive to the Union. You know, the data are all blown up if anything other than the set password is input.”

M-21 diverted his enlightenment-seeking eyes towards Tao.

“I can dissect this thing if I want to. But in the meantime, he might receive an automated notification on the infiltration attempt on his ser...”

“Excuse me. One moment.”

The doctor finally broke his silence to step in.

Without even glancing at Tao, who was shoved to the side before he knew it, the doctor typed in three letters strange to Tao’s and M-21’s eyes.

The monitor blinked to give way to the screen plastered with a variety of icons, to Tao’s delight.

“How did you know what the password is?”

“...I chose the name of the colleague who used to be closest to Yuhyung. He was sacrificed during massive city destruction, the inception of Yuhyung’s dark ambition.”

The atmosphere sunk into the dark faster than light, and Tao warmed up the joints of his fingers and in less than a breath opened the file Yuhyung had most frequently rummaged.

“What in the...?!”

Tao moaned, skimming and comprehension over as anticipated from an expert, and the doctor and M-21 madly wiped the monitor with their eyes, to not long after unhinge their jaws in mimicry of Tao’s expression.

“...Why don’t we talk to the director now? I don’t think this is something we can handle by ourselves.”

“...Very well. This way.”

The three humans trotted across the hallway, their movements so swift and forceful that anybody could have seen that nothing could stop them.

They soon came face-to-face with Taesik, his facial profile petrified to maximum due to the fact that they entered before the sound of their knocks was completely gone.

“So, what did you find?”

Prior to their visit, he was already notified of the contents they deduced with Lunark.

And of course, his mind fried by utmost fluster, he appealed how much he did not want to believe them.

Which did not last long, given that they were from the RK and Lunark herself.

Nevertheless, it was obvious he could not throw away the last glimmer of hope, made so very pronounced by his fingers clutching the edge of his desk like a falcon, gaze precariously ghosting over their faces, and body crooked forward like a hunchback.

Feeling slightly guilty at how he must totally annihilate his meaningless hopes, Tao unzipped his lips for the testimony.

“Please listen carefully, sir. I am terribly sorry to say this, but... It looks like Mr. Jang has been in secret alliance with the Union.”

At then Tao and M-21 got to learn how a rapid cancer patient diagnosed with less than a day to survive would appear, seemingly every shadow and shade in the universe transported onto his face, his lips abruptly stupefied and unable to demand if they can swear.

The doctor, who had also seen through the change with his boss, added with a voice barely free from a quake.

“It’s true, sir. It’s more than a presumption. We just found from his computer contents available only once one comes in contact with the Union.”

“I-is that true? Just what did you find...?”

“We already heard from Ms. Lunark what Mr. Jang had gone through during destruction of Seoul. And this ideology he has come to harbor ever since.”

Taesik gave a tense nod, reminded of Yuhyung’s idea of mandatory body modification for all incoming agents, which never fail to give chills to every piece of his spine whenever his memories are refreshed.

“And Mr. Jang had not aborted his idea. He’s been proceeding with a secret study, based on his major and his specialty in KSA, with help from the data from Union.”

“S-so... What is this data from the Union...?”

“Simply put, it’s... It’s rapid body modification. Or should I say, rapid pseudo-body modification?”

“What do you mean...?”

“As you’d know, the amount of resources required for body modification is beyond any human imagination. Especially time. Even perfectly modified humans would often take time to stay under observations or experiments or sign up for multiple modifications. Personally, I’d say time is the most essential resource in body modification.”

Taesik kept attendance to Tao’s words, his countenance full of inquiries.

“Which is why Union in the past studied a way to shorten the amount of time needed for body modification. It happened before I found myself at the Union. And before the M-series project, of which M-21 was part. The Union wanted to find a way to induce rapid physical changes that will temporarily yield power somewhat reminiscent of those from modified humans prepared from lab tables and tanks.”

“Is it safe to assume it’s a mechanism related to how DA-5 used to enhance physical qualities with pills?”

“Precisely. In fact, D that DA-5 used to ingest is what Aris refined from this project after it was canceled. I figured it out while hacking Union’s past data for fun. The purpose of this project was to provide weapon for humans whose bodies are clean from modifications to exercise superhuman power, no matter how small.”

“Listening to you, there’s no doubt it’s a useful technique. But is there a reason why this project was canceled?”

“As Union agents formed this unofficial caste system among them that separated the modified from the unmodified, voices against blessing ordinary humans with powers of modified humans became dominant. Not to mention how causing physical changes begotten solely through body modification on unmodified humans as well was extremely unstable and full of side effects. So it was only logical for the researchers to shred and burn their papers and charts. No one before Aris managed to see the light in this study.”

“...I see. That reminds me of this gas that Mr. Jang had once been developing.”

Tao, M-21, and the doctor flinched as soon as Taesik nodded and quoted.

“...Actually, we have something to tell you regarding that weapon.”

“We found traces that prove he had been handling the file on that weapon until the moment he left for Lukedonia. And we found traces of edit and copy from the files on research on implanting artificial bodies with artificial intelligence.”

Taesik’s face turned pale, other faces just as pallid.

A Union study that sought a way to imbue unmodified humans with powers on par with those of the least qualified modified humans.

A study on a weapon that will work only on designated targets, from none other than a person who advocated obligatory body modification for prospective KSA agents.

The data on the former was discovered inside the computer that belongs to a person who pursued the latter.

To top it off, Yuhyung’s research files on artificial intelligence was edited and copied, when they all remember that Rael and werewolves had violent contact with Union weapons against heads of clans.

So there was no more reason for them to stick to suspicions.

“If only I had examined his USB... It turned out that the reason why QuadraNet failed to come to life lay in Mr. Jang’s USB, which was revealed to be the secret USB once used by the Union. There was network hacking program hidden inside, and I’m sure he planted the program himself as he was working at Lukedonia and the werewolf realm. A secret USB can bypass most of vaccine programs utilized nowadays because it’s too outdated. Though it’s partly because I trusted him too much and deemed usual check-up useless.”

“It’s not your fault, sir. We should have been more careful with...”

Nothing will change even if they exchange apologies and forgiveness; the best they can do right now is to prevent something that might happen very soon.

With conclusion drawn in gloomy acceptance, Taesik bobbed his head.

“Can you get him now?”

“We should. We must.”

“We’ll be counting on you two.”

Just like that, Tao and M-21 turned on their heels, to catch the man who turned out to be much more dangerous than they had envisioned.

*****

As KSA was staging a moment as fatal and vicious as the moment a bomb is about to fall onto ice, Yuhyung finally made it.

Once again riding Rael’s back in a comical way, his face however was not at all comical.

His shaking hand was grasping his personal device that was playing the footage sent from his lab, equipped with cameras that had been working just a minute ago.

(next chapter)

The rapid pseudo-body modification is my creation, of course. But I’d say it wouldn’t be strange to find out Union actually had such technology, given that DA-5 could enhance their physical capabilities by ingesting the D. Actually, I had forgotten about the DA-5 when I began composing this chapter, and I remembered what DA-5 could do in the middle of my composition lol. Anyways, now the RK know, and Yuhyung knows as well. All that’s left is for them to capture and pummel the cause of all this, but as you’d know, it won’t be easy. Yes, I’m saying the RK and their allies would have a really hard time following this chapter. Sorry, my beloved characters. :’(  I hope you’d stay tuned for more!

[your-villainous-neighbour]

how did you know you have adhd??

Oof okay here we goes

(Long post, strap in)

So, during 10th grade, with the pressure of board exams looming over me like a goddamn cloud of despair with Absolutely No silver lining, I was struggling big (BIG) time because everyone was telling me to start studying right from day 1. And I just. Physically couldn't.

But naturally, my style was to leave Everything till the absolute last minute and then engage in panic-driven hyperfocus for 8-12 hours straight. A method which had ceased to work as effectively that year, as compared to the last 9. With the sudden increase in the amount of stuff I had to study, hyperfocusing for even 14 hours no longer worked (haha. surprise surprise).

Meanwhile, every adult around me was Heavily attacking me for "not doing enough" and screeching about how I'm "goinG TO REGRET IT WHY AREN'T YOU WORKING HARDER WHATS WRONG WITH YOU JUST DO 2 HOURS A DAY OH MY GOD IT ISN'T THAT HARD WHY WON'T YOU JUST TRY-"

I was trying. Real hard. It's just that nobody could see it.

And also, obviously, my "trying real hard" stopped 5 minutes into sitting at my desk, because filling in the margins on my books with ink was infinitely more interesting than, say, Nationalism In Europe™

So. Cue the whole "I Am Lazy And Therefore Undeserving Of Rights So Now I Will Blame Myself Because My Unproductivity Is A Conscious Choice. Time To Have Constant Breakdowns" routine.

And then, once, in the middle of one of those breakdowns, I was scrolling through Tumblr's depression tag (I was emo and desperate for answers don't clown on me) and came across this recurring thing called "executive dysfunction". Proceeded to look for posts specifically about that, with the hope that I'll learn something that'll explain why I can write chapters worth of marvel fanfic in one 6 hour sitting, but can't do biology for shit.

Interesting, I thought. Quite relatable, I thought. Holy shit that's literally me, I thought.

Then I was supremely disappointed that executive dysfunction was a symptom of something else, not a diagnosable mental disorder in itself.

I'd very nearly lost all hope and accepted that there's absolutely nothing wrong with me (not that ADHD is "wrong", but you get the drift) and that I'm just. Extremely lazy and self destructive and very into daydreaming for seemingly no reason. other than I'm Like This.

Buuut then I put a little more effort into looking up what executive dysfunction is, exactly, and what it could be a symptom of. Google said "depression" and I said yes yes I know I'm big sad but that's noT IT I CAN TELL THERE'S MORE TO IT-

Eventually I discovered ADHD could be one of the causes. At first I was in denial because "hey I haven't shown any symptoms whatsoever so far??? In all 15 years of life???" (a lie) "I don't have ADHD, nope, nah, not possible. This is just me trying to find excuses to avoid blaming myself. If I had ADHD I would've known by now, despite there being very little awareness of ADHD around me. I am lazy and trying to avoid taking responsibility for it. This is a completely understandable line of thought."

I know. I'm cringing too.

But curiosity killed the cat, or in this case, got the very ADHD teen a prescription for ADHD meds. I began absently scrolling through the ADHD tag on Tumblr, For Fun™ and slowly realising that I relate to every. Goddamn. Post. Under the tag.

Now this DEFINITELY had my interest.

Started doing research, reading papers from psychiatrists, taking "do I have ADHD?" quizzes from websites run by psychiatric institutions, watching people with ADHD talk about their experiences (shout-out to How To ADHD on yt, you saved my life babe), taking EVEN more quizzes, getting scores of 90% or higher on ALL of them, and laughing in private at ADHD memes which I felt I didn't "deserve", to relate to, but did nonetheless (lol wonder why) This went on for a few weeks. Or a few days idk I don't understand time.

And finally, one day, it just. Clicked.

Oh wow.

I've got ADHD, haven't I?

....

Fast forward a few more weeks and I went to this really sweet psychiatrist (who I still go to), and she listened to me talk for 2 whole sessions before going good GOD this child is the very PICTURE of ADHD let's get her some meds STAT

And here we are today :)

[stars-my-darling]

there’s a storm coming tonight

Quick disclaimer: I haven’t written fanficiton in a while (like seven years and so) but there are so many wonderful fanfic writers in this fandom that it really inspired me and I wanted to get back into it. So here I go. 

***

Amy could not put into words how glad she was that it was the weekend.

That was surprising because she hadn’t been at work at all that Friday. She hadn’t spent the day chasing down criminals, filing reports or tapping away relentlessly on a computer. Instead she had spent her day off looking after her kids. They were four and two now and she could scarcely believe it. 

Prior to having children she had never really understood that old saying of “No matter how big they get they’ll always be your baby”. But now that she was a mother herself, she really knew what it meant. She could clearly see that her kids were not as small as they had once been and they had learned more about the world around them, yet when she looked at them she couldn’t help but proudly think “That’s my baby”. Even though her oldest, Elena, became very indignant when someone referred to her as a baby. “I’m not a baby!” she would retort, stomping her foot on the ground, “I’m a big girl!”

Right now, Amy had that big girl and little brother, Atlas, in the bathtub and was currently scrubbing her head. The two had been their usual energetic selves all day and while Amy had greatly enjoyed playing endless games of chase and jigsaw puzzles with them and had even agreed to get the finger paints out (something she was usually reluctant to do due the inevitable mess it made) she was well and truly worn out. From Monday to Thursday she had worked a particularly grueling case and that in combination with looking after her two little (but very lively) angels all day had really taken it out of her. 

Normally, she would have brought them to the park in the late afternoon and allowed them to run around until they eventually tired themselves out, brought them home, made them dinner and then it would have been a case of pajamas and then bed. Unfortunately, the weather had not been on her side that day. After a lunch of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches (with the crusts cut off), Amy had been just about to coax the kids into putting on their coats and shoes and hopefully pry them away from the TV and seemingly endless reruns of Dora The Explorer. 

Before she got the chance to do that though the heavens had opened and it had been pouring down ever since. It was that kind of thunderous rain that seem to hammer down incessantly on the ground and was accompanied by the type of wind that could turn umbrella’s inside out. A disastrous coupling to say the least. So with the park firmly out of the question she instead opted for getting her kids to tire themselves out by playing in the bathtub. She had added chamomile oil to the water as well as rubber duckies and an assortment of other bath toys to keep them entertained. She was also washing their hair with a fancy (and not to mention expensive) lavender-scented shampoo which she was hoping would help make them sleepy.

“OK, tilt your head back, sweetie” she said as she filled a jug of warm water. Her daughter angled her head back and Amy emptied the contents of the container over her scalp. She repeated the motion until she was convinced that she had gotten all the suds out of her hair. Her little brother meanwhile, whose head she had already thoroughly washed and rinsed, was entertaining himself by splashing as much water as humanly possible and playing with the soap bubbles. Amy herself was completely drenched as was the case by the end of many a bath time. But she almost didn’t mind that much when she could watch her little boy squeal in delight when he decided to cause a mini tidal wave in the water or his look of deep curiosity when he tried to grip the foamy bubbles in his tiny hands.

“Ok” Amy remarked putting down the jug and looking at two freshly washed kids “Time to get out”. 

“No” Elena whined, shaking her head, knees drawn up to her chest. Amy sighed. This was always the hardest part of bath time. Despite how much convincing it took to get them into the bath, it took almost twice as much convincing to get them out of it. “Yes, Elena” Amy said, leaning over and lifting her son out and setting him down on the towel she had previously laid down. She started drying him off. “Time to get out. Mommy’s tired and needs her sleep” she looked at Elena, pleadingly “and Mommy can’t go to sleep until your asleep.” Elena thought for a moment, sighed and then got out. “Thank you, honey” she smiled, wrapping her in a white fluffy towel and earning a giggle from her before returning her attention to Atlas. 

Once she had both her kids dried off she realized she fallen behind on laundry so she restored to getting new pajamas out of the dryer. That was arguably better as the dryer had just finished it’s cycle so they were still warm and toasty. As she zipped Atlas up in his little white onesie she couldn’t help but feel a quick pang of sadness. This was the same little onesie Elena had worn back when she was two. Now she was way too big for it and in a few months maybe Atlas would be too. They were growing up too fast. Amy quickly pushed that thought away. She was being silly. Babies grew up, it was what happened. 

Suddenly she was drawn out of her thoughts when she felt a tug at the on the leg of her sweatpants. “Mama, can we have lavender toys tonight?” Elena asked, her expression hopeful. Lavender toys were what they referred to their heatable plushies as. They were soft toys that you could warm up in the microwave and smelt like lavender. The first one they had ever received was at Elena’s baby shower, a pink little owl given to them by Charles. Once she was old enough to use it she often requested it on cold winter nights. Atlas liked her little owl so much he soon wanted one of his own which resulted in her and Jake investing in a little brown teddy bear edition for him.

“Sure we can, honey” Amy replied, hauling her now pajama-fied son onto her hip. “But first” she said, holding out her hand to her daughter, “We gotta dry your hair”. Elena took her hand as Amy lead both her kids into her and Jake’s room. Sitting behind her dressing table, she placed her son in lap, grabbed a comb and started to get to work on de-tangling the soft brown curls that both her kids had inherited from their father. This was always Atlas’s least favourite part of the post-bath process and as per usual he fussed and wriggled all the way through, constantly trying to slide off her lap in an attempt to escape.

Eventually, Amy caved in and gave him a pacifier to calm him down and couldn’t help chide herself as she did it. Now that he was officially two they had been weaning him off the pacifier, giving it to him less and less. If they did, it was to only be in the evenings to help soothe him before bedtime and even then it was only to be used as a last resort. But right now Amy was too tired to try and reason with a fussy two year old so she let him have it. Either way it was keeping him quiet while she blow dried his hair which was Amy’s favourite part of the post-bath process, mainly for how adorably pouffy her son’s hair was afterwards. She playfully and gently ran her hand through it, watching it stand on end, before planting a kiss on the top of his head.  She then turned her attention to Elena.

Elena was the opposite of her brother when it came to this. She was good at staying still throughout the process. Both the brushing and drying didn’t bother her. If anything she always seemed to enjoy always the process.

Once Amy had the lavender toys out of the microwave and had handed them over to her eager kids, it was time for bedtime stories. 

Back when Amy had only one child, she use to sit on the edge of Elena’s bed and read to her. When her second arrived it became the custom for Jake to read to one of them and for her to read to the other. Each night, they switched places. However on nights like this, where she was solo parenting while Jake was on a stakeout with Charles, it was the custom for both kids to climb into her bed with her and she’d read a mutual favourite story to the two of them. 

Right now thought, judging by the way Atlas was pulling at the shoulder of her sleep shirt, she knew their was something else that required her attention first. “Elena, honey, can you be a big girl and pick out the bedtime story for tonight? One that both you and Atlas would like?” Amy asked, balancing Atlas on her hip as she pulled back the covers of the bed with her free hand. Elena immediately perked up and gave Amy the thumbs up, “OK, Mama” and then scurried off to the little private library space Amy had in her apartment which now had a kids section. Amy couldn’t help her smile as she watched her go. There was something undeniable adorable about a little kid in footie pajamas, especially when they were pink with kitties on them like Elena’s were.

She climbed onto the bed and pulled the covers up around her and got ready to nurse. As she sat up in bed and brought her baby to her breast she couldn’t help but feel a tinge of sadness. Atlas was two now, it was getting to the point where he was too old to nurse. He ate normally throughout the day and ate normal food and it was only about once every few days he asked for milk. It seemed like he was getting bigger by the day. He was talking more and becoming more verbal. Pretty soon he would be officially out of babyhood and undeniably a fully-fledged toddler. She knew soon, like within the next month of so, that she would have to wean him off her milk completely. 

Elena came creeping in just as she was finishing up, clutching a copy of Where The Wild Things Are, her little face beaming. Amy made some room and patted the place beside her “Come here, baby” she said as Elena hurried over. Amy laid Atlas down beside her as Elena settled down on her other side. She opened the book to the first page. She knew she wasn’t as good as Jake when it came to doing the voices, but her kids didn’t seem to mind. As she watched them take turns to turn the page, she couldn’t help notice the difference between them. 

While they both had similar appearances having both inherited Jake brown curls and their parents mutual brown eyes, their personalities were different. While Atlas was pretty much his father’s mini-me, with the same goofy grin and his keen ability to always make his mother laugh, Elena seemed to be a blend of both her parents. She, like her mother, liked being in control and in charge but also hadn’t seemed to inherit her mother’s love of tidiness and order. Atlas on the other hand was more shy and reserved, which more reminded Amy of herself. Elena was more confident and sure of herself which in some ways kind of reminded her Jake. 

One of the things she seriously loved about being a mother was the seeing her kids grow into their own little individuals. While there was some things that she could definitely tell they had inherited from her or Jake, she could also see things that were uniquely individual to just her kids. She was reminded, not for the first time that night, how big they were getting. That had been weighting on Amy’s mind recently.

She and Jake had talked about having a third. Nothing was completely decided yet and they were still determining all the finer details, but they were leaning towards maybe trying for one. Part of her felt like she just wasn’t done having kids yet and Jake had admitted part of him felt the same way.

By the time she got to the last page both her kids were dozing off on either side of her. Maybe it was the fact that that warm, toasty sensation seemed to be lingering on their pajamas or that she could definitely still smell that concoction of lavender and chamomile from the bath in the air or her general exhaustion but either way she definitely felt like joining them. She was glad she had gotten them to brush their teeth before their bath so she didn’t have to move them.

“Hey, do you wanna sleep in Mommy and Daddy’s bed tonight?” she whispered to Elena. “Uh-huh” Elena murmured, her eyes already closed, nodding. She turned to Atlas “What about you, honey, you wanna sleep here tonight?” Atlas cuddled in close to her. “Here” he muttered. Amy smiled and decided to take that as a yes.

Seeing as they were all in agreement, she leaned over and switched off the lamp on the bedside table. She pulled the blankets up around them, the quilt was heavier then her usual one due to the colder, wetter weather outside and it added to the current cosy-ness in the room. She gently wrapped one arm around each kid. She immediately felt them snuggle in closer to her, responding to her familiar touch. 

Amy had overall not enjoyed the sensation of being pregnant but she had always acknowledged that one of the few perks of it was that was arguably the closest you could physically feel to another human being. It was hard not to when you were growing one inside you. But Amy would argue that the closest you could feel to that feeling again was cuddling your kids under a blanket. When she looked at them now all soft hair and little hands and chubby cheeks, she felt something grow warm in her chest. Delicately, she leaned over and gave each of them a quick kiss on each of their foreheads. “You two are the most precious things in the world to me” she whispered into the darkness. 

Then, with that she felt the exhaustion of minding two little kids all day and working a long, tough week envelope her and she began to feel herself drift off into sleep. 

***

Amy woke later in the night of her own accord. When she slowly opened her eyes she was greeted by the sight of her husband who had seemingly gotten home and crept into bed without waking any of them. That was impressive. 

Atlas had rolled over in his sleep and was now currently facing Jake whose arm was now draped over him, holding him close. Amy now had one arm free and the other wrapped around her daughter. Gently, Amy stretched over and gently ran a hand through Jake’s messy curls and across his jaw. She always knew it but in that moment, she was struck by how much she truly loved him. 

She then resumed her previous position and readied herself to fall asleep. Somewhere, between and consciousness and unconsciousness, as the rain hammered down outside, she realized how lucky she was. There had been times where she had feared that this would never happen. Times when she couldn’t face seeing another negative pregnancy test. Yet, here she was with two kids, a loving husband and the possibility of someday having a third one.

But right now, she wasn’t thinking about that. Right now, she was happy to just fall asleep surrounded by her little family, perfectly content with the people she loved, listening to the rain pouring down outside.

[notthatiwilleverwriteit]

Hellooo! What's your opinion on He tian and Jian Yi friendship from the start till now? And Mo and Zhang friendship from start till now? Also, I loveee your 'the cycle of the sunflower' fanfic!♥️

Good evening, anon-san, sorry it took me this long to answer You had interesting and quite broad questions but first things first: I’m happy to hear you enjoyed my fic so much, and thank you very much for letting me know! I was actually entertaining some tentative ideas for a sequel today while procrastinating. But you know, not that I will ever write it.

“What's your opinion on He tian and Jian Yi friendship from the start till now?”

Tl;dr: I was pretty annoyed by He Tian at first when he was trying to get close to Jian Yi but these days I quite like their friendship. I especially enjoy those little heart-to-hearts they have sometimes.

You gave me quite a long timeline, and I had to go all the way back to chapter 60 when HT was apparently featured for the first time:

That panel doesn’t give us a lot to go on, and I’m sure most of us didn’t even pay that much mind to the random black-haired guy. I know I didn’t. But in retrospect, it could be interesting to wonder if OX’s intention was to make a fleshed-out character out of that random black-haired kid at that point already.

After his first appearance, it takes about 40 chapters before we see HT again (ch. 102):

This time their interaction seems different, like it has more meaning and HT is not just a random passer-by teasing him a bit. JY is upset and conflicted after giving ZZX the confession letter entrusted to him by Xiao Hui. He doesn’t tell HT what’s wrong but he’s obviously down, and HT seems to attempt to lighten the mood, perhaps even comfort him a bit. It’s hard to say how serious he’s being. What’s interesting is that he’s again patting JY’s head, but this time it doesn’t have the same teasing vibe.

After that chapter HT started to pop up more often and increasingly annoy me. Before long, I was fully in the “okay, buddy, you need to go be somewhere else” mood. Whenever he spotted JY’s mop of blond hair in the crowd he annoyingly stuck to him and draped his arm around his shoulders like they were the bestests friends.

What annoyed me the most, though, was that it was hard to say why he was acting so buddy buddy. One thing that struck me about their friendship from the beginning was that it seemed rather one-sided. It was HT who seemed to initiate hanging out and being turned down time after time. I didn’t know much of anything about HT, so at first, it all came across as him being romantically interested in JY. And I couldn’t have hated anything else more. I was fully invested in Zhanyi and worried the already slow pace was going to be hindered by some cliched love triangle. The only thing I was happy about was that JY didn’t have any interest whatsoever in HT.

For quite a long time, I didn’t really question or go back to the idea of HT being interested in JY in a romantic sense. I just thought his interest shifted to MGS. Now, after learning about HT’s past, goals and priorities, those early chapters tell a different story to me. 

Rather than being in love with JY, I think HT sought him out for two reasons.

First of all, we all know this kid is so lonely it hurts to watch but making genuine friends isn’t a simple matter in his situation. I already talked about this in one of my earlier posts, but the bottom line is, HT isn’t like his classmates. He was born and raised in a vastly different world but can’t tell anyone about it.

It’s almost like he’s living a double life. In front of his classmates and fangirls, he appears easy-going, cool, and carefree, but in the shadows, he looks much more intimidating and colder. Both of those sides are a part of him, but no one knows about his dark, shadow side. Not only that, but HT himself wants to get rid of his other side and deny it. If anyone learned about it, he’d risk putting them in harm’s way but at the same time, he craves the “normal”; acting his age. If he was being careful, maybe he could try and have friends even if he couldn’t show them all of himself.

However, I think HT also had another objective to get close to JY. I think he knows more about JY’s family than JY himself and was low key keeping an eye on him. I’m sure the surname “Jian” means something to him if She Li can recognize it as well (ch. 117):

It’s unclear to us how much he knows about He Cheng’s business with Mr. Jian, but I’m sure he’s guessed by now that dirty underworld wants something to do with one of his friends. He seemed to be in the know enough to rush over when HC was trying to get JY for the first time (ch. 166) and later warned his brother to not “get any ideas” (ch. 229). He’s probably pieced together that they’re trying to get to JY but since there’s nothing much he can do to stop that he’s just going to have to follow him. It’s still better than to let him get pulled into the lion’s nest alone. If that means he has to go all the way to the doorsteps of his own family, then so be it.

What I probably love the most about HT and JY’s friendship are those little heart-to-hearts they started having. The borderline philosophical nature of them reveals interesting new sides to HT’s character especially. I think JY was the first one who formed a deeper connection with HT and is still the only one who ponders those kinds of life-sized questions with him.

Chapter 133 is my favorite chapter about the deeper side of their friendship. Earlier JY had asked HT what people are living for, and HT’s half-serious answer was “probably so that they can do the things they want~”. He hadn’t meant it to actually stick with JY, not to mention prepared for JY to get back to the topic and ask something seemingly simple but rather personal from him later on (ch. 133):

Not only do I think that no one had seriously asked HT that before but that question also invited HT to open up. Though, all JY got out of him was:

Even in all its vagueness, it was the first time HT had implied being from a different world to someone who’s not a part of it, at least not knowingly. And that’s a quite sad line if you think about it. The things HT wanted to do in life were no doubt vastly different from JY and most kids of his age. He didn’t want to grow up to a man who would hurt others for a living. He wanted to belong in the world of JY and ZZX. He wanted to protect his friends. He wanted to do good and rid himself of his past that way. He wanted his brother to want to be like him, too. He wanted the puppy and wake up one morning to a normal family and life and it’s all been just a long nightmare. 

All of that remains unspoken and is replaced by silence, instead. HT just pats JY’s head while they stand in the rain and tells him to go to ZZX already; he hadn’t skipped just to sit around with HT, after all. JY wants to go but is also a bit worried about leaving HT like that. When he asks, “what about you?”, HT goes back to teasing him. Before leaving, though, JY gives him a little side-smile that warms my heart. That smile somehow has an understanding undertone to it, and he’s cursing HT almost affectionally.

They had a moment, and no one can convince me otherwise. It was as if JY got a feeling that maybe there was more to HT than what appeared.

And that’s how I see them now; JY was probably the first and closest thing HT could call a friend and it’s become more than just looking after him for HT. JY’s genuine, curious, and obliviously frank nature brings out certain kind of depth and platonic, big brother kind of affection in HT. It also seems JY was the first person to be cool with HT’s “dark” side and not think any less of him.

“And Mo and Zhang friendship from start till now?”

Tl;dr: They’re a bit odd together but I really like their little bonding moments. They’re weirdly similar but in different ways. Mo Guan Shan definitely needs and deserves a level-headed and no-bullshit friend like Zhan Zheng Xi.

This friendship certainly had a rough start (ch. 126):

There’s one thing I’ve always wondered about that fight: Was ZZX actually getting the upper hand? I’m hesitant to say ZZX is a better fighter than MGS, but he still seemed stronger. Did MGS also notice he was about to lose (in front of his posse, no less) and picked up the rock which was somewhat of a dirty move? Did ZZX get strength and courage from the need to protect JY? You know, when you think about something that matters to you and get a mental/physical boost to your drive that takes even you by surprise a little? He didn’t have a delinquent reputation like MGS had but if he lost this fight JY could be in trouble and he had vowed to protect him since they were little kids.

Well, either way, I was surprised how easily ZZX let the thing go when he and MGS came face to face again. He suggested an act of revenge but was actually the only one who wasn’t serious about twisting MGS’s balls in the end. Not only that but he seemed to even think MGS wasn’t that evil (ch. 150):

If I had been ZZX, I’m not sure I would’ve wanted to have anything to do with MGS after that. It’s still a bit unclear to me why ZZX suddenly thought like that, but maybe that’s just how his mind works. He doesn’t dwell or hold grudges, perhaps he finds that even a little childish.

He certainly started to consider MGS his friend and wanted to genuinely help him when the whole She Li situation unraveled and was frustrated when it looked like they couldn’t do anything (ch. 184):

Overall, compared to HT and JY, ZZX was a different kind of friend for MGS. HT would raise hell and go up against anyone who dared to mess with him. JY didn’t lack enthusiasm and oblivious courage to stand up for him and loudly demand justice. To both of them, MGS reacted with varying degrees of annoyance.

ZZX, on the other hand, was silent, calm and mature. He doesn’t talk bad about people behind their backs and when he’s done with something, he’s done with it. He’s in touch with himself and grounded. But it seems MGS wasn’t used to having people like that around. The way ZZX wasn’t bothered by being alone with him made him uncomfortable (ch. 248):

MGS is always half-expecting people to negatively react to him somehow; avoid making eye contact, look down on him, and whisper behind his back. When ZZX just stands there in silence and faces him head-on it bothers MGS. He feels awkward because he never apologized for the fight and bashing ZZX in the head. Pulling stuff like that in the heat of the moment could have had serious. long-lasting consequences. He seems to be ready for ZZX to bring it up and hold it over his head, and he’d have the right to do so, too. But it doesn’t look like ZZX is expecting an apology, either. As far as he goes, the matter is over and done with.

Interestingly MGS and ZZX are quite similar deep down but in a different way as weird as that might sound. They’re both very responsible; MGS has had to work and take care of the house from a very young age to support his mother. ZZX is very close with his little sister, he’s always taken care of her and learned the responsibility that way. They both have tsundere characteristics; Others being touchy-feely with them might earn them curses and a couple of punches, but they’re good at taking care of others. ZZX can be quick to lose his temper with JY but also quite tender and reassuring and surprisingly comfortable showing affection. MGS takes a certain kind of pride in cooking for his friends and can’t quite hide his concern for HT if he’s bleeding or having a nightmare. His help is always very practical.

What I love the most about ZZX and MGS’s friendship is that they kind of join forces being the only responsible voices of reason of the bunch. As a huge fan of my precious MGS, watching them bond over cooking warms my heart so much (ch. 289):

I’m so happy MGS has gained such a strong and loyal friend as ZZX. I’m really interested in seeing more of them together.

Thank you for your interesting question, anon-san, and sorry for such a late reply again.