the more I think about it and rewatch his scenes, the more I cannot help but realize that Colin is coded as a neurodivergent character. At least, I can very clearly see how Luke Newton, a neurodivergent actor, is playing Colin as a neurodivergent character
a special interest in Greek mythology? in traveling? neurodivergent
taking people's word at face value without 'reading between the lines'? neurodivergent
not being able to read Penelope's feelings regardless of how 'obvious' they are? neurodivergent
brain constantly bouncing around from one idea to the next (as in the books)? neurodivergent
not saying the 'right thing' and admitting to having to rehearse important conversations? neurodivergent
all that rejection sensitivity and regret he had well over a year after his engagement blew up? neurodivergent
masking in public? the whole 'charming facade'? neurodivergent
the man straight up STIMS, I mean how often do we see him fidgeting or playing with something? he has an oral fixation like no one's business, always eating, rubbing his mouth, licking his lips
I just can't unsee it
and, one day, i hope our fandom is going to be ready to recognize how many of the things we've unjustly called him an 'idiot' or 'stupid' for is actually just him existing with a neurodivergent brain and how hurtful that can come across to us neurodivergent peeps who identify with him
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does gojo ever do anything just to show off for you? he is Gojo Thee Strongest after all; how does he live up to that?
they literally had to stop sending us on missions together bc the incident reports were 80 pages long from his showing off lmfao yaga pinching the bridge of his nose looking over the reports like “did you seriously have to hollow purple two cursed that would’ve easily been handled by her by herself?” and like yes he did!!!!!
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Took me a while to realize but I can see similarities in how Asuka seems to process grief and how Guts from Berserk also processed his grief after the Eclipse. They both get so overwhelmed by the wrong that happened to them (father's hospitalization vs the Eclipse and a lifetime of misery) their reaction isn't to seek comfort in others or help/protect their loved one who needs them after the tragedy, it's to go off and inflict their pain on others to self soothe, as if that'll release the feeling from their minds.
The difference is that Guts was called out for this by Rickert and Godo. He needed to snap out of wanting to prioritize ridding his own pain to remember Casca needed him, and that Casca even in the state she was in was all the good in his life who went through the same experience with him. Guts had to remember he loves Casca more than he wants to self destruct. Like Godo told him he was a sword called fear with cracks in it. He feared sitting with his pain and grief and seeing it on the person he loved after so much violation. He feared vulnerability.
Asuka doesn't do this reevaluatation and has no one to call her out for her self destructive coping canonically. She can't sit with anything bad or face looking at it on a loved one either. That's too bad and helpless of a feeling. She's just as much made of fear (primarily from any helplessness as much as violations of her inner ethics) which fuels her anger, but her one personal attachment to her father who needs her isn't enough to make her want to reevaluate what she does at all. Instead his tragedy is the permission she needs to self destruct and destroy in the process, not like Guts who always told himself everything was for Casca and the fallen Hawks, who always reminded himself of the pain to justify the bloodletting.
Unlike Guts I think she'd be stubborn even accepting to listen to someone pointing her behavior out. Though her anger toward Feng did start out carrying a reminder this vengeance is for Dad even if it kills her in 5, even in 5's branching narratives that excuse falls apart when she continues in the tournament for her own pleasure during her route. The moment vengeance is achieved critically injured Dad is out of her mind. Her behavior during 6 repeats this process, preferring to hurt herself and others rather than sit to process a shitty feeling over her and the world's situation. Like Guts in this state she pushes away anyone and everyone else including any comforts because the anger isn't resolved, the fear isn't resolved, the pain isn't resolved.
They're both used to everyone being against them and having to fight for survival until they found joy in it as a side effect. And because of that independence born from isolation when something like the tragedies that happened takes place they put resolving their pain not on sharing with others but into scorching the earth along with themselves.
I don't say this either to imply they're exactly alike or that they have enough similarities to make a true character comparison because they absolutely don't. There's also some stuff I'm leaving out simply because Guts is a far more complex character in ways where there's nothing from Asuka to compare against (I would say Kazuya is the closest, more fitting Tekken comparison for substituting Guts vs Asuka style notes). I just find it interesting that even across wildly different stories the outline for an angry, self destructive, terrified person who thinks self destruction makes them strong and puts them in control uses a lot of the same foundation. And the contrast in their depths really shows how far you can push the concept depending on what you want or need for the character.
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You know I really do not need Jeremiah Arkham to be Black Mask at any time ever. Someone’s gotta fill the niche of mental health professional who is 100% not a supervillain. A guy whose evildoing comes only as an example of what a psych ward can do to you if they just choose.
The tension of knowing he started out extremely dedicated and genuinely wanting to help people, seeing him victimized and bullied by rogues in his care until even the last shreds of professionalism that held place of his already run down empathy wear out, and despite being sympathetic to this hopeless state being nonetheless nauseatingly horrified when he turns to abusing his patients because in his position he can just do that and hypothetically could have chosen to do that over anything,
is way better to have in there to work with Batman’s exploratory themes of power, justice, corruption and institution, mental illness, and ‘Society’ ect ect
than just saying “and then he snapped too much so now he’s in a legacy costume and a straight jacket too.”
No hate to my other villains who have lost their licenses. Some of those guys are some of my favorite rogues, and I love them dearly, but we need one uncostumed one.
(Yes, I am arguing that something from a giant superhero franchise should not have another costumed villain because themes, as if costumed villains is not the whole genre. I am also the sort of person who gave up on No Game, No Life after reading more volumes than I’d care to admit, because I got sick of wading through the gross parts waiting for them to tackle the subjects of debilitating phobias, isolation, codependency, and family that I thought were promised to me before realizing that was never gonna happen. So. Take me however you will. Please pretend reblogs are disabled bc tumblr isnt giving me the option rn)
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Disclaimer: I personally have not finished TBC beyond the first book. I did finish AVOS and its back half is considered poor quality for a reason. If you aren't having fun now I can tell you right now you wouldnt enjoy the rest. At most I think (iirc) the last book is important bc it establishes Juniperclaw attacking SkyClan, and Shadowsight getting a vision to swim in the flooded lake to 'unite' the clans- both of which are relevant to TBC in some way. But even then you could probably skim to the rrlevant parts, IDK.
i'll be real when i made that post last night it was kind of out of sarcasm and pettiness, like i do think im still gonna read those last three books and skim the boring parts at the very least, but that's on me cause now when i look at the post it does come across as very whiny and serious so that's on me lmao. (and i was kinda whiny at the moment cause i always forget about how mean spirited these books are.)
buuuuut hearing what people are saying, it does make me feel a bit better for skimming the back half of avos cause i think thats what i'm gonna have to do for sanity's sake if i want to catch up. i do want to give quotes and takes that are really backed up by the books and not secondhand info so i will try to keep to it but i think if i'm gonna read about thunderclan being shitty to twigpaw then im gonna start skimming cause like, we all know they were shitty to twigpaw now, it was uncomfortable when she was a kid and its uncomfortable still now that she's an adult. you don't need to see that backed up once again.
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“self immolation as a form of extreme political protest has a long history all over the world, and aaron bushnell’s death should not be discussed solely as a suicide”
and
“people who are already hurting and vulnerable can do more to help while they are still alive than they could in death, and should not repeat aaron bushnell’s actions”
are statements that can and must coexist, actually.
he felt that he was complicit in genocide as an active duty us service member, and, to an extent, he was. but also as an active duty service member, he was legally not allowed to quit his job as a member of the military.
his final act was to take drastic measures to draw attention to a genocide that many people in this country are turning a blind eye towards, and i commend him for his sacrifice. it should be honored and remembered.
that doesn’t mean i want anyone to feel that they should follow in his footsteps.
he should not have been made, by nature of his employment, to feel that he was complicit in genocide, because those in power should not be funding and supporting it in the first place. but they are doing so, and he made it clear that did feel that way. we can’t change that. that doesn’t give us the right to dismiss and ignore his actions.
“this [genocide] is what our ruling class has decided is normal.” and it shouldn’t be.
keep bushnell’s message in mind as you organize. protest, fundraise, call your representatives. these are actions that have a tangible effect. and they do far more to help than dying.
but i’m not going to condemn him, just as i’m not going to condemn the likes of thích quảng đức. i’m not going to say that his death was worthless, because it brought undeniable attention to the matter at hand, despite attempts by american media to gloss over why he did what he did.
i understand where people are coming from — self immolation is a deeply disturbing thing to witness, even blurred. i was very deeply affected by the video. but that’s exactly why he did it; to get through to people that this matters.
i don’t want anyone else to die, either. but remembering aaron bushnell and what he died for is not synonymous with encouraging suicide.
his last words were “free palestine” and, as people living in countries that are funding extermination, it is our job to carry on that cry until palestine is free.
that means living to see it through. ensure that he did not die in vain.
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