#we kill the yaoi boy

[hk33b]

rangi (to kyoshi): the avatar can be reborn, but you can't kyoshi

jianzhu (to yun): you're everything kuruk was not, and I couldn't be prouder

fic inspo

[bishonenspit]

seeing the new omegaverse anime on my twitter feed has me thinking of this tweet nonstop

[the-one-that-weeps]

Every time someone in this godforsaken fandom says "I think we've talked about misogyny enough" I want to hit them with a hammer. No we haven't.

We haven't even talked about the deep "Ruikasa&Akitoya Vs. literally everyone else" imbalance enough but imagine all of the people that get pressured into writing specifically for male/male ships simply because otherwise they won't get any appreciation.

Yes it's a cowardly thing but when you see Ruikasa having over 4000 fics and Ichisaki having like 5 in total obviously you're going to be discouraged. Obviously you'll be biased into creating Ruikasa instead of other ships.

And as someone who depends on appreciation in particular to do any work at all obviously that's going to have a lasting consequence. Some people spend 4 hours crying in front of a screen just for 3 people to like their work and leave, it's understandable if they lose passion for creating at all, you guys killed them.

It's even in how we handle m/m ships. You go into a fic that's tagged Rui&Tsukasa(platonic), someone in the comments always goes "okay but when do they kiss". You go to an action-packed longfic, someone always ends up going "okay but when do they kiss".

Fuck you guys. Actually. This is a silly piano tiles game about Hatsune Miku, we should be one of the MOST CREATIVE fandoms in history and somehow people still get mad over two boys not kissing immediately after getting introduced. It's so fucking difficult being a content creator in this fandom because you always end up having to take the same route. They meet they tease they kiss. End of story. "Oh you're doing something "lame" instead? -1 kudo. Bring me my yaoi next🖕"

[absolutebl]

Meet You At the Blossom - Watch Along

Maybe a trash watch? We will find out.

But first what do we know about this show?

Well, I can't for the life of me remember the title. The article placement it too weird so it will henceforth be called Blossom okay?

Here's what I learned from @renafire

Duck daddy!!!!! I bring news! China didn't kill the gays! Meet You at the Blossom is an HEA! Golden retriever XiaoBao x ice prince Huaien (who gets the shit stabbed out of him an awful lot for being a ML). A side CP of dumb, pretty bodyguard x eccentric doctor. The background plot was basically a bunch of middle age men fighting about the ML's long dead mother. Needles! So many needles! (It was practically a sickfic tbh) Flapping sleeves! Flowing hair! Poison! Politics! A villain weirdly into kites! Prisoners in chains you can easily slip your hand through! Dimples! Loyal bodyguards becoming family! It's not the best thing ever, but it ends happily! There was even a line about "true love has nothing to do with gender" which I feel like is a big deal for something associated with China?

This convinced me to watch, so I thought I'd just post it verbatim to convince you, too.

So I'd refused to watch Blossom because I assumed the leads would die or at least be torn asunder at the end, and that there would be no kisses.

So this Watch Along is going to be me eating crow.

China pretty much always does censored BL (when they do it at all) since 2017 or so. You can watch something like My E-Sports Genius Brother for the style of "happy but censored BL" that I've grown to expect from China. (Although I wouldn't necessarily recommend it.)

They didn't used to do this! Time once was that China was this chaotic minefield of tasty mess meets terrible tropes (like kidnapping, stepbrothers, rape, whipping boy, and dub con). I had a weird love for it at the time because it was the Wild Wild World of BL beck then and I didn't know to expect better.

I come from 90s Yaoi. Remember?

Ah the bad old days. (You can read a history of CBL here. Not updated in ages.)

Where was I?

So, what I knew about Blossom was that it was a Wuxia BL and that it was made with Thailand, or for Thailand, or something to do with Thailand (there is Thai script on the promo material) and that it wasn't being distributed inside Mainland China. (I still worry about the actors but that's kinda a natural state for me and BL outside of Japan.)

Outside of China Blossom got wide distribution showing up everywhere iQIYI (China based), Viki (Japan based), Gaga (Taiwan based) WeTV (US Based) and YouTube (Thai Channel Artop Media is serving it).

It also looks like Heavenly is involved and they are Korea based. So like, everyone had their mitts on this thing. We live in crazy times.

Okay so, here are my 20 expectations:

Pony tails with a ribbon or two

Lots of questionable older tropes, especially dub-con & kidnapping (the herb that makes you horny maybe?)

Flowing filmy robes wafting everywhere

EXTREMELY PRETTY men, costumes, make up, setting... well, everything

No consent whatsoever

Pokey pokey, but not with the right kind of swords (a naked blade will be grabbed by a naked hand, sadly also not in the preferred way)

A bodyguard hotter than he has any right to be, wearing black

Floaty fighty fighty, including but not limited to: skid backwards through puffs of dust, a leap to land + one knee down + holding sword + head bowed, a twirly protect baby from baddies

A boat in a lotus pond

Poison, probably green, glittery if I'm lucky

Circular architecture

A big fuck off fan

Puppy-cat pairing

They wander through bamboo, sit down at the edge of a lake, probubly on a log

Wound tending, of course, because there will be lots of wounds

Someone pushed onto a platform bed (also kneeling in front of it)

A jail with straw in it

Older men with sparse beards detracting from the romance

Fruit or some other food being thrown

Some serious SLEEVE action.

Li Le as Zong Zheng Huai En

Probably the reserved unhinged one. Has sword, will prod.

He has a solid track record of shows under his belt. So to speak. One wonders how they persuaded him to do BL. He sure is pretty tho.

Wang Yun Kai as Jin Xiao Bao

The son of the wealthiest man in the Jiangnan region, probably the cheerful cute one.

He's an entirely green actor.

Most of the cast is from mainland China, with the exception of Achi Sukonlaphat Sribubpha, who is Thai (obvs) and under Artop Media.

Nancy Chen is directing

She is a Taiwanese director and screenwriter, who directed HIStory 4 and HIStory 5 (neither all that great) and was behind very queer friendly Pappy & Daddy.

I wouldn't call her a stellar director. I would say I've been reserving judgement, but if you pin me down I'd call her Taiwan's New.

Pitch

Xiao Bao (cute) falls in love with icy, white-robed stunner Huai En due to an unexpected meeting. Discovers she is actually a boy (and a baddie). Hijinx ensue.

Adapted from the novel Hua Kai You Shi Tui Mi Wu Sheng 花开有时, 颓靡无声 by Shui Qian Cheng 水千丞

Co-production with China and Taiwan. But the country of origin is listed as Thailand.

12 Episodes, 40 min each (or so) for a total fresh content run time of 8 hours.

Aired: Jul 11, 2024 - Aug 15, 2024 on iQiyi, Viki, WeTV, Gaga

Shall we get started?

I had a surfeit of options since Viki, Gaga, and iQIYI all had Blossom. I like Viki's interface best, want to support Gaga the most, but in this case, I opted for iQIYI because... screen shots. So it's all your fault.

EPISODE 1: Nicknames, pretty men, dimples, twirly, stabby, floof!

I don't like the intro music, it's too slow and tinkly, but classic for the genre I suppose. Still I'm fast forwarding through all the falling cherry blossoms.

All right. Now it's about time for... YES...

Emperor Infodump

Chancellor of Extraneous Explanations

As You Know Bo

Sorry sorry. The puns must flow.

The deets: layabout emperor = chaos & suffering. New emp = strong & popular but his baby bro wants to rule. New emp exiles bro to obscurity. New emp = good ruler. Order established through patriarchal dominance. Children laughing in the street. Got it.

I will not be remembering names, FYI.

We open on kid in trouble over a kite killed(?) by baddie.

Enter pretty spangled skippy puppy McDimples. I shall call him Dimples. Dimples = spoiled rich kid having trouble finding a wife - presumably because they all know he gay.

Enter hottie evil cut-glass cheekbones McPoutypants. Haven't decided what I shall call him. It'll come to me.

Extremely pretty men. CHECK.

Ooo, a big hat on horse back!

Of course, how could I not have had that trope on my checklist? My bad.

And a bunch of assassins slow-dropping out of trees like lazy fruit. I forgot that, too.

I gotta say, fairy prince or high elf is not a bad moniker for twirly-sword cheekbones supreme.

Floaty fighty fighty! CHECK

Oh, I thought they'd go in for crossdressing at the very least but I guess they went for Dimples is an idiot instead. Interesting choice. I see we also have the "baby is a clumsy bunny" trope all set to deploy. Carry on.

Grab the sword and skid through the dirt. CHECK!

And a fainting!

Pony tail with ribbons. CHECK

Dimples might be a bit too much of a prat and an idiot for me.

[Have begun watching at 1.25 speed. Don't fault me.]

I always find the orange/yellow eye makeup that Cdramas put on characters of questionable morality fascinating. Why those colors specifically? And why eye makeup specifically?

We arrive home. It fancy. Daddy doesn't want an unknown lady for his baby (silly daddy, ladies are for ladies, boys are for boys).

Everyone acknowledging that elf prince is, in fact, The Prettiest is very pleasing to me.

Meanwhile, there is some kind of list/stuff/thingy and Prince Shen wants it and is a bad guy, maybe? I can't remember names from the beginning so I have no idea what's going on with the plot but also, it is only going to get more convoluted. Plus the weekend is coming so I'll eventually be drinking and watching this. Plot is for people who don't like BL. And don't have six bottles of sake in their fridge.

Snicker.

Where was I?

Oh yes. Judiciously NOT following the plot.

Dimples and his 2 enablers seem to share about 1/3 of a braincell between them. But they're sincere about it.

Engage secret identity trope and the expected cross dressing.

Ooo Shen is The Prettiest's uncle? Damn it I'm trying to follow the plot again. Must not get sucked into plot. This is a Cdrama therein lies madness. Ah, Prettiest is the son of the emperor's exiled younger bro? Got it.

Twirly protect baby from baddies! CHECK

And that's episode 1 in the bag. In the sheath?

My thoughts so far:

This couldn't be more exactly what I expected if it tried. I mean it is trying. And it's succeeding in being a Wuxia BL. So. Yay! Performing to the packaging. I appreciate that in a show.

I'm looking forward to more.

(On the advice of one of my spies I've switched to watching on YT when I can, YT and Gaga are supposed to have the better subs than iQIYI and Viki. That said I found iQIYI's serviceable.)

EPISODE 2: Checking a bunch of stuff off my list in rapid succession

Poisoning?

No. Sex herb? CHECK

Discovery that she is in fact he?

Dominance Tussle? Dub con? Rape? Already? CHECK

Well that came fast (presumably so did he).

There’s a lot happening all at once at the beginning of just ep 2. 

It’s an ACCOUNT BOOK that’s causing all this fuss? Hilarious. 

Enter the anticipated hottie (bodyguard? spy?) in all black wearing a hedgehog. CHECK

(I didn’t expect the hedgehog, I have to admit.)

Oh is the single brain cell society is trying to grow additional brain cells? That's not gonna work.

Cheekbones is still the prettiest.

Oh HELLO stern grabby Daddy not-older brother of yummy. We likey.

Who do you belong to?

Why do you have The Biggest Sleeves?

Do I take that as a sign of gayness?

Please? 

Ooo looks like I’m right. 

Also this is very silly.

And "I never said she was a woman."

It’s just so funny.

OH NO!

Stern prince bro is leaving already?

I only had Grabby McDaddy for a very short length of time. I already miss him. 

Meanwhile, Dimples apparently has no compunction about being in love with a man, we blew through a bisexual identity crisis while I wasn't looking, and now we exist inside the gay=okay bubble? I did not expect The Bubble(tm) to show up in a Wuxia, but I guess this is a BL universe and we all just float around in it… 

Cheekbones is a bit of an asshole. Quite apart from the, ya know, bit of rapey rape thing.

I also did not have absolutely terrible VO dubbing on my bingo card. I forgot about that one in Cdramas.

EPISODE 3: Distracted by the pretty

Some kind of dark past for dimples and his little (not blood ) sister. 

Sniff test, the greatest trope of 2024 apparently. Nice to see the execution of a modern trope in a vintage style BL.

Aa ha! Kneeling next to a platform bed. CHECK

And more poisoning and drugs.

Wound tending. CHECK

Aweeeee Dimples is worried about Cheekbones! How cute.

Also, the ice queen appears to be melting.

Ooo. More sexitimes? Consensual this time. Okay. I guess Taiwan did get its nuts all over this show. (Honestly, that was a mistype but I'm keeping it in.)

The bit with all the bodyguards was great.

And my love for Mr. All-Black Clued-in Hottie persists.

We are now in the “does he like me back?” phase of the high school narrative. We are also in the "do I like him at all?" part of the narrative. Suddenly, this is an angsty YA. 

Ice queen has melted and is now turning into jelly. (Can you tell I’m very pleased with myself and this metaphor?) 

And now, Dimples is sick?

Boy, is this fast moving! I have to say, that is something I did not expect at all. Usually Cdramas are much slower than this.

I do love how shameless D imples is. It’s kind of delightful. He’s definitely in his bisexual awakening slut phase.

Cheekbones is also a doctor, apparently. Useful man. 

In other news: I would really like to add a full length crossover wafting robe into my wardrobe. I have no idea why I feel compelled by such a thing.

EPISODE 4: Gay sleeves AT last

Not a lot happened in this episode. Mostly flirting. More backstory and plot that doesn’t really matter. Presumably this intended to be character motivation?

We do not need him to be motivated we need him to be pretty. Understand the brief please.

Why no more floaty floaty sleeves?

Oooo, because sleeves in gay! CHECK

I did like the scene of the blood being cleaned up after the assassination attempt(?). It’s kind of nice to see that depicted for a change. I always worry about all that blood on that nice stone work.

Oh the handholding it was very cute.

Ice queen has melted and now turned entirely to jelly. Very very jelly.

Dimples is so stupid proud of his tall deadly wife. It's flipping adorable in a very goofy way.

I guess Cheekbones has come around and now Dimples has officially been claimed, multiple times and in multiple ways. He can't change his mind or anything now. Trouble is afoot...

asleeve?

ahead...

ahem.

I'll stop now.

EPISODE 5 - It is a Thing I guess?

OMG Cheekbones just loves his stilly bint of a bf. It’s absolutely absurd. The ultimate puppy/cat pairing.

I love it that he’s just casually walking around with a knife sticking out of his back and only cares that baby may have gotten a splinter in his finger.

Now we are in the vows portion of the early romance. I am assuming betrayal is coming soon? 

Grabby McDaddy! I missed you! Here to perform the part of Basil Exposition I see? No grabby for me? Sad. Unfortunately, if you aren’t flirting with a man I’m going to be fast forwarding. Although your sleeves are very nice.

Uh oh, Dimples is in trouble. 

Okay that was that. No screen caps, I lazy.

EPISODE 6 - DOOOMMMM

Oh lovely. More rape. I guess Dimples went looking for that response? Is that the implication? Does Dimples have a rape kink? What is with this show? 

No brothels for a baby I guess.

It’s not gay... it’s poison? 

It’s not bisexuality... it’s the slut herb? 

The single brain cell club is now the wailing fates. 

I guess cutting off a man’s hand out of jealousy is no biggie? Well this is a BL. Jealousy is the #1 excuse!

Fighty floaty blood spatter death! This time on wooden planks. Those are impossible to get clean. 

Meanwhile, there’s a lot of backstory and stuff I don’t care about, and probably can’t follow even if I did care about it.

I don’t like the Emperor at all. But then I don’t think I meant to. I am a little shocked that there aren’t more men with sparse beards distracting from the romance. But I guess this is a BL, they go for youth even in wuxia.

EPISODE 7 - You know what they say about a man with big sleeves?

Oh, Daddy McGrabby is back and he's a good guy! He’s also in love with Dimples. 

Oh no!

What is this sensation I feel being thrust upon me?

Is that…?

Is that second lead syndrome? 

I think it is.

Oh well, it was fated the moment I saw the length of his... sleeves in episode 2.

Meanwhile?

Dimples gets tortured by acupuncture. 

Poisonings are always so elegant and classy in Cdramas.

Blah blah captured rescued captured rescued again sort of. Cheekbones is now seriously imperiled. We swap one for the other in Grave Danger (TM).

Enter the Divine Doctor character! Who (Dr) I have been told reliably by previous witnesses is A Favorite. I do love this particular archetype (quirky healer wise beyond his years - sometimes actual immortal. ) I am prepared to be delighted.  

(source)

FYI I will keep this updated until Tumblr stops me. It has this bug where it won't let you edit after a while. At that point, this post may abruptly stop. You should use the first tags to find the updated version and the full watch along.

[ghostscrown]

Dead Boy Detectives characters are such icons fr. We got :

Ghost boy who thinks he's good at hiding his gayness but everyone in town spots him immediately, who's unintentionally rizzing up every single man he meets (EXCEPT his crush) because his charisma is so far in the negative it has the opposite effect, who ran away from literal hell because a spider demon made of dolls is after him, who genuinely thinks hysteria is a very real serious medical thing, and who becomes friends with the fujoshi who introduced him to yaoi

Ghost boy number two with eyeliner and severely repressed anger issues, who beats villains with a cricket bat despite owning a sword, who's completely CLUELESS about his best friend of 3 decades having a crush on him despite literally everyone else knowing the second they meet them, who's running away from the afterlife just because he doesn't want his friend to go to hell, who owns a magic hammerspace bag, and who's in a situationship with a medium

Local fujoshi whose hair became naturally bleached after she was infected by some psychedelic dandelion sprites she's now keeping as pets in a jar in her room, who avoids her problems by running away to another country and watching Scooby-Doo as she ignores her mom's letters, and who organizes dates for her landlord (gone wrong)

Medium girl who can read in your mind but whose memory was stolen by a demon named David who also happens to be her toxic ex, who's haunted by said toxic ex, who was apparently a total bully before she lost memory, who has a black women exclusive meeting happening somewhere in her subconscious, who's full last name is "Palace Surname-Von Hoverkraft" and who violently scares homophobes with the help of her two ghost friends, one of which she's in a situationship with

Blonde witch who bargained immortality to a goddess but forgot to mention she wanted eternal youth too, who kidnaps little girls at night to feed the giant snake she keeps in her basement, who has a personnal beef with some kids, who brutal pipe murders people, and whose ultimate goal is to become the goddess of one town

Goth lesbian butcher landlord constantly covered in blood, who's also a true crime fan, whose crush was actually a stalker and tried to kill her at the first date, and who accepts to rent rooms to suspicious kids talking to themselves and probably in a runaway no questions asked

Crow familiar of the witch, astrology fan who was made human in the sole purpose of seducing the gay ghost to trick him, but it didn't work and he was the one falling in love and being pathetically rejected instead

Catman who wears skirts and eats people, who curses the repressed gay ghost to either sleep with him or count every cat in town like he's a whimsy fantasy creature, in the sole purpose of exposing his gayness, but who becomes more and more of a pathetic wet cat as the ghost keeps rejecting him again and again

Dude who's not a dude but actually a cursed walrus, who was changed into a human and is now owning a magic shop and desperate to traumadump every single person in his field of view

Transdimensional being who uses the power of triggerring PTSD to chase troubled teens in a runaway and take them back to hell, got eaten by a fish and can fit her whole body in a mail package

[ironunderstands]

Rant about how yall perceive Dr. Ratio bc I’m tired

I really wish people would stop projecting their hatred of debate bros and egotistical college students onto Dr. Ratio. Like yeah, they suck we know we are tired but please he is not a frat boy trying to convince you that 12$ being minimum wage is a good thing actually. The funny thing is that most of Ratio’s haters would probably have him agree with them on a lot of topics, but the problem is people don’t use their brain, hear “ratio is racist” and run with it without ever questioning if it’s true or makes sense for his character. Y’all cannot handle a character being kind but not nice, and honestly I’m so happy ratio isn’t a woman in canon bc oh my lord the misogyny that would happen if he was.

And honestly, I can’t even blame them considering how OOC half of Ratios “fans” write him.

Like please the next time I get hit with stoic, emotionless, unempathetic, uncaring, self-centered, narcissistic asshole (and even racist slaveowner ew god kill it with fire) ratio FROM HIS “FANS” I’m done. Stop, please get your grubby hands off of him. I’d rather read 10 dead dove fics in a row than be subjected to the horrors that is fanon Ratio. Especially mfs who write him this way in Aventio, I despise how a genuinely loving ship dynamic got warped into “toxic yaoi” bc people can’t read and/or be normal about mlm ships ever. I’m genuinely begging for a new popular gay ship to exist so all the weirdos can go run to that one and I can enjoy Aventio in peace.

To everyone who writes him correctly, thank you I love you, begging for more wholesome Aventio and Ratio content in general pls it’s the closest to canon (if you care ab that) I beg

[victimsofyaoipoll]

Round 4

Gwen

She stands in the way of Merthur, by far the most popular ship in the fandom. I haven’t seen it as much in recent years, but back in the days of fanfiction.net she got slut shamed so badly for having been romantically interested in three of the male characters over the course of the show, which is just... normal straight woman behavior, meanwhile Merlin crushed on pretty much every woman who even looked at him in the early seasons of the show and got no hate for that whatsoever. I barely even read Merthur fics (not because it’s m/m, just because certain aspects of their relationship don’t appeal to me) but the “Gwen is a slut” attitude was so pervasive across the fandom, even fics that weren’t explicitly anti-Gwen would “jokingly” call her a slut. I even saw a few fics demonizing her for having an affair with Lancelot despite the fact that SHE WAS ENCHANTED when that happened, and surprise surprise, Lancelot (who was also under the influence of magic) got none of that hate, and neither did Arthur, who got enchanted to fall in love with multiple women over the course of the show.

Canonically Arthur Pendragon's love interest and an important and interesting character in the show who's completely shoved aside and ignored in favour of the medieval bbc yaoi ship. At best they put her and Morgana in Lesbian Timeout (ie make them get together and then reduce them to wingwomen at best because god forbid we focus on the medieval bbc yuri). Justice for Gwen right now!

She is prince Arthur's love interest (eventually wife). Arthur is MADLY in love with her. He tells his tyrannical father he would give up his crown to be with her (she's a servant in the series). He forgives her cheating on him with Lancelot (!), which in the show is caused by an evil enchantment, but the characters never find out about it. He chooses her time and time again. His love for Gwen is literally never put into question. Many fans insist to this day that there was no chemistry between Gwen and Arthur compared to Arthur and Merlin. Arthur isn’t even particularly nice to Merlin most of the time! The funny thing is that Merlin himself ships these two so hard and does everything he can to help them get together!! Gwen & Arthur are adorable and too many fans were drunk on the yaoi fumes to see it. ARTHUR WAS A SIMP FOR GWEN

Every Supernatural Woman

Supernatural is so mean to women and committed to queerbaiting but it still gives Sam and Dean lovers to kill. The writers kill and villainize them and the fans get the few that remain

wincest and destiel shippers cannot handle the idea of their blorbos having a Woman THREATENING their SHIPS god FORBID

It literally used to be a running joke that if a female character got introduced you knew she was going to die soon because fans would react so negatively to her "stealing" one of the boys away from the big ship, whether it be destiel or wincest

[monakisu]

I'm pretty sure Joker being like Sleeping Beauty in Royal was intentional. After all, third semester in general has a fairytale theme, with Sumire being Cinderella and Maruki being the Fairy Godmother that grants her (and everyone else's) wishes. But he's also Maleficent, because he puts Sleeping Beauty (Joker) to sleep. Hence Maruki viewing himself as the good guy but also being the bad guy. He gives Sleeping Beauty his Prince Charming (Akechi) in order to convince him to stay within the dream of the false reality, but fails to realize what Prince Charming's goal is in every telling of the story. To wake Sleeping Beauty. Hence, Akechi being the most against the fake reality and being the one to convince Joker not to stay in the reality. By failing to admit his role as the villain, Maruki brings about his own demise in the form of Akechi. It's so well done I can't imagine it being anything but intentional. I mean, Joker even walks with Akechi, "once upon a dream" if one considers the fake reality akin to a dream.

^^^ YEAH!!!!!! YOU GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🧨💥🧨💥🧨💥

i find the irony of goro and maruki’s varying self-awareness levels to be RESPLENDENT!! like here we have goro who has always desperately yearned to be the hero and yet he’s resigned himself to playing the role of villain, the big bad wolf killing mothers and fathers and plotting against the righteous thieves… but come third semester he’s the heroic prince charming saving sleeping beauty!!

(although i like my yaoi toxic, i have to admit how perfectly akira and goro click together as two halves of a whole; they intrigue and excite each other, fulfill their savior complexes and desire to be known intimately, bring the best and worst out of each other...) these two freaks are literally this:

anyways i like to daydream that in the euthanasia ending (i enjoy how horrifying and clinical that name is) even after the rest of the world has long forgotten akira, goro, who has always been stubbornly aware and driven by the truth (i mean, both his AOA's talk about the truth; the boy is FIXATED), will eventually make his way up sleeping beauty’s tower to wake up his love…

and then there’s the other part of the irony: maruki who thinks himself to be his new reality’s messiah but is actually the real Big Bad woa!! a classic evil queen, the evil stepmother, coraline’s other mother trying to trap her in her spiderweb… amazing!!! like u said, he’s simultaneously sumi’s fairy godmother and akira���s villainous fairy! everyday i thank the devs for adding third semester bcuz hoo boy did it elevate p5 to the high heavens!!

i’ve always been very fond of the sleeping beauty parallels in p5, but i’d never thought about it thoroughly enough to realize how instrumental goro’s prince charming role is in dismantling malecificent’s curse! thank u for opening my eyes!! i’m literally giddy from glee!!!

[unnoticed-poison]

𝚈𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚎! 𝙳𝚊𝚛𝚔! 𝙷𝚊𝚣𝚋𝚒𝚗 𝙷𝚘𝚝𝚎𝚕 𝚅𝚊𝚛𝚒𝚘𝚞𝚜 𝚇 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 °【 𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝟑 】°

【 𝕿𝖗𝖆𝖎𝖑𝖊𝖗 𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕 】

【 𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝟏 】

【 𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝟐 】

【 𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝟑 】

【 𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝟒 】 𝕻𝖆𝖗𝖙 1

【 𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝟒 】 𝕻𝖆𝖗𝖙 2

So I forgot I explained the situation in my other yandere fic but not this one so I'll do it now so everyone will know.

The reason some girls are genderbend is because I can't exactly write yaoi or yuri cause of my religion, the most I could do for them is turn them into males so they can be romantic yanderes, hope you guys understand.

Also because I like to write genderbend as well.

The treatment Valentino gives Angel Dust will be mentioned of course, and not all the girls will be genderbend, it depends on how the story will go.

So anyways enjoy the chapter ❣️

˖๑‧˚꒷꒦₊꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦˚‧๑˖𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 ˖๑‧˚꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦₊꒷꒦˚‧๑˖

Things were not going so well for Charles at the meeting.

"And then I went ahead and invited her to my place-"

This 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘳 won't stop babbling about useless stuff and avoiding the topic at hand.

"- I failed to seduce her since she's so oblivious, but I can always try again next time," Adam said nonchalantly, taking a bite out of the rib as he glanced at him. "So what did you do this weekend?"

"Sir." The exterminator standing behind Adam looked less than thrilled while listening to his boss's chattering as well. " There's only a few minutes left for the meeting."

"Really? Oh well, you can start talking then."

Fucking finally.

Charles stood up after clearing his throat, holding up his papers as he started explaining the situation at hand.

"So I'm sure you're well aware of the overpopulation issue we're currently facing, I would like to suggest-"

Adam interrupted him. "OH that's not a problem at all! we're taking care of that just fine, Lute!" He called out as Lute stepped closer to him. "How many demons did you kill this year?"

The exterminator's voice was blunt as he answered. "Got a good 275 sir."

"275!? Badass! Awesome job danger dick." They fist-bumped as he said this, making the demon frown.

They're proud of that..?

"You know those are my people, right..?"

Adam laughed. "Of course! And that's what makes it even better!"

Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, Charles continued. "As I was saying, all our problems will be solved if we rehab those sinners and cleanse all their souls so they can join you guys in heaven and the extermination won't be needed anymore!"

He explained as fast as he could while holding up each paper. " The redeeming process will take place in my hote-"

"That's enough."

Huh?

"But I haven't finished yet-"

"I've heard more than enough, if what you're suggesting is letting those miserable fuckers climb up the ladder then you can forget about it, that's the dumbest idea I've ever heard in my long, loooong life."

"Everyone makes mistakes! They can redeem themselves-"

"They had the chance to do that when they were 𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦, now that they've earned damnation, it's no one's fault but their own," Lute spoke in a scornful tone, his eyes narrowed in disgust. "And for your information, angels 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 make mistakes."

Charles narrowed his eyes at him in return. " You really think so."

The man smirked. "I 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 so."

Adam, visibly annoyed, slammed his hands on the table, making them both stop. "Alright that's enough!"

He rose to his feet and made his way over to Charles until they were standing face to face. " Look here pal, hell is forever and there's nothing, and I mean absolutely 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 you can do about it, so I suggest you give up now, and I'll pretend I never heard any of that bullshit."

A sneer of contempt crept over his face as he towered over the boy, he looked too much like his father, just looking at him made him 𝘴𝘪𝘤𝘬.

"You should consider yourself lucky that damned snake gave you a pardon from the extermination or else you and your hellborn kind would've been dead a long time ago."

Charles could feel his blood boil, his face flushed in rage as he scowled at him.

This damned bastard-

Before he had a chance to respond, the angel suddenly stepped back.

"And now that I've got your and the audience's attention, I would like to announce that we've made a determination!" With a triumphant smirk, Adam turned his head to stare directly at where the camera was.

...?

Confused, Charles turned his head to where Adam was looking.

....

Shit!

There was a camera?!!

How come he didn't notice it!

"-To move up the next extermination."

What?!

"Wait a second that's not-!"

"I can't wait a whole year to slaughter those little cunts, I know the day just finished, but we'll be back in six months!" Taking hold of both the drone and Charles's hand, he sent a menacing smile to the camera. " Enjoy those next few months dear sinners! Cause they might be your last."

Once he said that, he roughly threw them out of the room and returned to his seat while bursting into a fit of laughter.

"Wait!" The demon exclaimed, papers scattered around him as he tried to enter the room again. "Hold on a moment!"

"Now where is my favorite angel-" was the last thing he heard Adam say before the door slammed shut in his face.

......

Frustrated beyond words, his face scrunched up in anger as he slammed his fist into the door.

"Fuck!"

This was not how this was supposed to go!

He made things WORSE.

He then heard a voice come from the small drone.

"Looks like Lucifer's brat fucked things up for us all! What a shocker, I'm sure your father will be 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥."

....

He squeezed his eyes shut, letting out a deep sigh as he dropped his head, feeling defeated.

"Excuse me, are those yours?"

Huh?

Charles lifted his head and looked over his shoulder.

Despite the woman being out of uniform and wearing a simple dress, he was certain that she was one of the angels with the wings and halo.

Moreover, the giant hammer in her hand, still dripping with blood, served as a stark reminder of her rank.

Her other hand was holding the papers he drew at the hotel, with a basket hanging from her wrist.

Was that an egg?

Despite being a little disturbed by the sight, he couldn't help but be drawn by her looks.

She's pretty...

"Sir?"

Charles snapped out of it, a flush spread across his cheeks when he realized he'd been staring too long.

With a sheepish nod, he stood up and brushed off his clothes as he went over to you.

"Oh yeah they're mine!"

With a nod, you extended the papers. "Here you go then." You said, handing him the papers, some were stained with blood.

He looked at the stained papers for a moment before taking them off your hand. "Am.. thanks."

"No problem, have a nice day."

With that being said, you walked past him and towards the room he just got kicked out of.

His eyes followed your back for a moment, letting out a heavy sigh and turning around to leave when he suddenly paused in his tracks.

Wait..

𝘚𝘩𝘦'𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦

𝘐 𝘧𝘢𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘥𝘶𝘤𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘳

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦'𝘴 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘷𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘭?

Perhaps you're the one that arrogant prick was talking about?

𝘍𝘢𝘷𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦..𝘴𝘦𝘥𝘶𝘤𝘦...

Maybe it wasn't too late yet!

If he could convince you of his project then maybe...

Perhaps you could help change Adam's mind as well!

Or at the very least move the extermination back to once a year like usual.

"Miss! Please wait!"

Turning back, he quickly headed over to you.

Upon hearing that, you paused and turned back to him with a raised brow. "Do you need anything?"

"I'd like to speak with you about something urgent."

You silently glanced back at the door and then back at the blonde, you had arrived just in time to witness him get thrown out by your boss.

So you had a pretty good guess on why he wanted to discuss with you.

"I'm sorry but my boss's words are final, I have no say in them, so whatever you spoke with him about I can't do anything."

That was mostly a lie, but the blonde didn't need to know that.

"Please! I beg you, it will only take a minute."

Gazing at the sheer desperation on the man's face, you couldn't help but feel a pang of sympathy for him.

..........

.....

Damnit.

You finally let out a sigh. "Go ahead, I can't promise anything though."

?!

Charles's face lit up with happiness as he gave you a beaming smile.

"Thank you!"

Despite your visible disinterest, the man excitedly explained his entire project to you in detail.

There might be hope to clean up the mess he made after all.

˖๑‧˚꒷꒦₊꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦˚‧๑˖𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 ˖๑‧˚꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦₊꒷꒦˚‧๑˖

Hope you guys liked the chapter!

I really need to focus back on my Yandere Animation Studios fic, that thing only has the trailer chap posted 😭

Anyways until next time ❣️

[fob4ever]

everyone be quiet i’m cooking……..

pete said that the mmy video meant a lot, that it was his favourite fob mv next to the me&you mv.

pete ALSO said in the vh1 ybc commentary also said that the mmy mv “thematically fits the song”…. (the mv where pete and patrick fucking kill each other……….)

obviously from this he’s basically saying he associates the song with patrick- def not all of it, but enough to call attention to it in the vh1 commentary… and enough for him to say that the mmy mv “meant a lot” to him… and i think looking at the lyrics/video we can probably infer that he’s viewing the lyrics&vid through the lens of fob going into the hiatus- “the person you’d take a bullet for is behind the trigger” etc etc.

sidebar: both of them have talked about how pete called patrick after his blogpost in 2012 and how he didn’t answer immediately- how there were “a couple calls” according to patrick

that was all in 2013-14- now flash forward to 2015 and he’s introducing mmy with the “cornflower blue” poem:

i lost my cool / i lost my mind / call you up 3 / demand you have no fun without me / let me know you say you’d be no one without me / but it feels too dark / cornflower blue sometimes i miss missing you

insane behaviour. BUT THEN! instead of reciting what he wrote… pete instead says “i’d be no one without you” instead of the inverse. twisted. sick, even. not even MENTIONING the fact that pete saying that “he’d be nowhere” without patrick in a fobrock q&a in 2005…….

i don’t even have a point with this except to say: evil gay toxic platonic fall out boy yaoi. delectable

[palin-tropos]

“disco elysium fans ignore the themes for gay ships” I am adding the crunchiest themes with my gay ship thoughts I could write a dissertation on mazovian yaoi already. I could say so much about what the game does when it thematically ties “communism” and “love”. from the mazovian socio-economics thought: “[communism] hasn't really worked out yet, but neither has *love*—should we just stop building love, too?” 

I could say a lot about the extremely conflicted relationship that communism seems to have with raw human emotion, on the one hand it’s the foundation of everything. revolution is built on rousing up emotion, and the end goal is some kind of euphoria-utopia, phrases like “hope in work and joy in leisure” in the game remind you of that. the total fulfillment that is longed for and promised. the end of alienation is about emotion

but then there is a sort of terror that human emotion will cause reaction and undermine the cause and needs to be controlled, guided by a firm hand, manipulated, that it can’t just be let loose on the world. that it’s careless emotion that draws people away from the cause and towards the allure of other ideologies. intellectual rigor is needed to resist it all. critique, critique, critique

and love is one of the most terrifying and uncontrollable emotions, especially romantic love for another person. it’s such a deep form of interpersonal connection and yet it’s often destructive of a person’s true self in the name of an idealized image born of that intense emotion (and oh boy does disco elysium have things to say about that). it defies critique, it sings its own song, it blooms from within and overtakes all reason

lashing the themes of love and communism together, from the lurid tales of eight hour sex to the explicit and possible relationships between historical figures... war crimes committed not for the sake of power but in an achillean (in both ways) rampage, institutions and systems like décomptage being founded from a romantic partnership, characters whose passion for the cause is mingling with potential attraction and devotion to each other, the hanged man was killed by communism but love did him in—

it’s about emotion. in disco elysium, emotion is a kind of materialism

[regheart]

From one old men yaoi shipper to another… I notice that a lot of marauders and wolfstar works tend to portray Sirius as kinda mean towards Remus, where tenderness, kindness, and understanding normally come from James. It’s either that or Sirius being completely devoted and in ride or die love with Remus. Do you think Sirius could deliver tender moments and more sincere exchanges with Remus (romantic or platonic)? Or was their relationship not like that?

well, there are two moments in the book that come to mind in terms of portraying how sirius feels about remus

first, is when they meet again at the shrieking shack at the end of PoA. remus is the one whose feelings are easier to read, because so far we've known him pretty much for who he is, while sirius has yet to prove himself innocent

Then Lupin spoke in an odd voice, a voice that shook with some suppressed emotion.

“Where is he, Sirius?”

[...]

Lupin was lowering his wand, gazing fixedly at Black. The professor walked to Black’s side, seized his hand, pulled him to his feet so that Crookshanks fell to the floor, and embraced Black like a brother.

and, you see, the really cool thing about the ending of the book is that sirius was willing to show up, kill peter and probably run off again. harry is the most important person in his life, but at this moment he has no hopes of building any sort of relationship with him. remus is the one who calms him down and helps him see the bigger picture (before harry does the same to both of them), and obviously there's the narrative factor of needing to come clear about a lot of information and keeping the action as easy to understand as possible, but sirius stands on the back for the big part of remus' story

it is obvious, from the start, that they've had their differences, but they fall back swiftly into easy camaraderie as soon as they reunite and you can't do that if there was never any trust, love (however you want to see it) and companionship before

“Ready, Sirius?” said Lupin.

Black had already retrieved Snape’s wand from the bed. He approached Lupin and the struggling rat, and his wet eyes suddenly seemed to be burning in his face.

“Together?” he said quietly.

“I think so,” said Lupin, holding Scabbers tightly in one hand and his wand in the other. “On the count of three. One — two — THREE!”

we are lead to believe that james and sirius were equals — equally brilliant, equally confident, equally brave — while remus and peter were excluded from that. but looking at the way adult remus interacts with sirius, and how he's included in the joke after their owls, his participation on creating the marauders map and the general propensity to mischief, he was their friend and it's frustrating when people completely overlook that because his role in their friendship (and the main things that distinguish him from peter, his loyalty and the capacity to stand oh his own*) is no demerit to whatever the other two have and his magical skill and his intelligence is not erased because it manifests differently

everyone and their mother has this scene memorized but i'll post it again

the second thing is how sirius speaks of remus in OotP, which is more than one moment but i think it shows how he tends to act towards him as a friend

i. when they're talking about prefects

“No one would have made me a prefect, I spent too much time in detention with James. Lupin was the good boy, he got the badge.”

“I think Dumbledore might have hoped that I would be able to exercise some control over my best friends,” said Lupin. “I need scarcely say that I failed dismally.”

ii. sirius comforting harry about umbridge

“Yes, but the world isn’t split into good people and Death Eaters,” said Sirius with a wry smile. “I know she’s a nasty piece of work, though — you should hear Remus talk about her.”

iii. discussing SWM

“Of course he was a bit of an idiot!” said Sirius bracingly. “We were all idiots! Well — not Moony so much,” he said fairly, looking at Lupin, but Lupin shook his head.

“Did I ever tell you to lay off Snape?” he said. “Did I ever have the guts to tell you I thought you were out of order?”

“Yeah, well,” said Sirius, “you made us feel ashamed of ourselves sometimes.... That was something...”

in these three scenes we see sirius bringing up remus in conversation, even when isn't present, and including what he thinks is relevant and positive, half of the time with remus assuming his own failings after sirius cuts him some slack

now, it could be argued that the compliments in each case are condescending (as if saying remus was nice! and also uncool), but i think they show acknowledgement of something remus was probably proud of (being a prefect, at that time) and sense of fairness that he feels he should point out (being less of an idiot), and remus confesses to his share of guilt

the fact that they are living together, hanging out, discussing werewolf legislation from two years ago, suggests closeness and comfort in spending time together. i see both the joining forces to murder our traitorous friend and the casual relationship as a reflection and a continuation of the friendship they had during the first war. once they take down the obstacle of believing each other the spy, they trust each other completely and they share similar experiences and understandings of that time, more similar than any other pair in the order

i understand that people believe they don't understand each other (no one fully does, get it together), and i see this particularly in how sirius tends to soak into his own sorrow once he is there and not realize how others may feel similar to him (when harry says he wishes he could stay with sirius, even if it were in grimmauld place, and not with the dursleys, sirius replies that fighting dementors is exciting which is not at all what harry is complaining about), and remus is so used to suffocating his own wishes and complaints that he can also fail in providing comfort to others because he can endure making himself miserable

and that is reflected on the prank and how sirius speaks of it, and remus prioritizing dumbledore's orders over sirius' well being

but this specific issues are what make their mid-30s relationship compelling to me, not at the cost of their shared history and knowledge of each other's worst traits and mutual forgiveness and unspoken tenderness and aligned morals and politics and internal jokes and shared secrets and willingness to try again and make it work this time

*remus lives a miserable life, but he lives a life nonetheless, he has multiple jobs, he makes right decisions and wrong decisions, he is a valuable member of the order and a friend to multiple people, peter was a servent to other death eaters. do we really need to argue on this?

**not referring back to anything but while i do think james was more aware of other people's feelings and had a better response to them, i don't think he was particularly kind, in the broad sense of the word, not until they were older, and i don't think it was impossible for sirius to have emotional awareness and responsibility, just that his upbringing made it difficult for him to have acceptance and understanding as his default reaction to anything, so this is something he probably had to work on himself and be conscious of his own acts of kindness

[21angryfrogs]

Inscryption Act 2 Dashboard Simulator

🔍 gadgetinspector Follow

i think we should all start unionizing actually.

🚬 shrimps.is.cards Follow

yer just mad cause ya didnt git a raise this month n i did.

#as the boss'd say: L + ratio

15 notes

☁️ dyke-mage Follow

just found out that rebecha is 26??? she should be at the club...

🔧 trans.on.a.mission Follow

"the club" is a state of mind i'm in when clobbering whoever keeps breaking my bridge. woof.

#im serious #when i find you its on sight

1,905 notes

🦦 iceekaycee Follow

for those not caught up on the old man yaoi lore...

#that makes 3 this month... #what is wrong with them

21,039 notes

🗝 wizstim Follow

⚠️ PSA!!!! ⚠️ guys you really need to stop telling people to k/ll themselves!! you never know what people are going through, and it can be really bad for people's mental health!!! 🍯 gooart Follow

^^^ SOME OF YOU SHOULD READ THIS OVER A FEW TIMES!

☁️ dyke-mage Follow

kys beam. get them, boys.

🕯the.melter.official Follow

kill yourself.

🚬 shrimps.is.cards Follow

kill yerself.

🎣 fishfearme Follow

krill self. now.

7,192 notes

🕯the.melter.official Follow

currently living in a peaceful state of tumblr fame where i'm popular enough to have to add "official" to the end of my blog name but not popular enough to have an evil shadow clone of myself.

🌋 the.melted.official Follow

HELP ME SOMEONE PLEASE DEAR FUCKING GOD LET ME OUT OF HERE

🕯the.melter.official Follow

... haha... did anyone else hear that....?

2,071 notes

🕸 wellitsgolly-deactivated277457

🔍 gadgetinspector Follow

how did she say that

92,644 notes

🦦 iceekaycee Follow

🍯 gooart Follow

does anyone else find it kind of troubling how many people are voting and campaigning against THEIR OWN EMPLOYERS?? i mean sure, sometimes they can be cruel, but we still owe a lot to them!!

☁️ dyke-mage Follow

grimora sweep.

🕯the.melter.official Follow

grimora sweep.

🪄 magikificus Follow

grimora sweep.

🔍 gadgetinspector Follow

grimora sweeHey Who Was That?

🦦 iceekaycee Follow

SCRYBES FOUND THE POST, EVERYONE SCATTER

#I DIDNT EVEN REALIZE THEY WERE ON THIS SITE??? #WHOOPS

276,651 notes

💾 po.tothethird Follow

for april fools i'm deleting this entire game. sayonara you insubordinate shits.

1,263,333 notes

[ruumirmir]

𝘐𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘔𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘘𝘶𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘗𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘣𝘰𝘺

ੈ♡˳ Author's note - I simply have too many unfiltered thoughts about them Sorry not Sorry. This is entirely self-indulgent and completely male-reader centered. Don't worry ladies,, If you're imaginative enough!! You too can self-insert into this yaoi!!! If any of these don't make sense to new readers Don'tttt worry about it :) Probably didn't make sense to ME either but the vibe matched. @eluxcastar my trusty co-pilot for this ship,, do you have any memes to add perchance 🎤🎤 I'd love to compile everything here.

If you think Pantalone isn't a possessive prick you're WRONG. Lucky for him some people are into that.

Being gorgeous and evil go hand-in-hand one cannot exist without the other

*Sighs dreamily* Dont we all

Synopsis of my first two Pantalone x Male reader requests everybody:

Im sorry but it would be fucking hilarious for the plot. Loverboy being soooooooo normal about the rumours going around that Dottolone are Such Close Business Partners,,

but actually dottolone fucking hate each other. Group projects tend to do that to people. Its the biomechanical malpractice doctor vs business unethics banker. And dottore getting a massive kick out of this one fatuu agent hating his guts . Idk Just a Thought :0

What being microwaved does to a man. Dont worry guys Pantalone can manipulate and gaslight me into a killing machine anyday bc he's hot <3

Hoyoverse canonizing Pantalone's anger-issues is the best thing that happened to me. you can never trust an anime snake with a (^‿^) face

One does not simply work in close proximity with a hot guy and Not think about getting boned atleast once.

Somebody save childe

Makes zero sense in hindsight but the lore is coming. trust 🙏 Something so delicious about finding your way back to the person that changed you forever.

Hes just a pathetic little guy your honor. Let us all enjoy his extreme sad boy demeanor and sopping wet meowmeowism before we put him through the HorrorsTM.

Synopsis of literally the most recent Loverboy one-shot by riri:

Something something blatant favoritism.

Reminder that Loverboy joins the Fatui as a part of mandated service right after graduating school at the fresh age of 18 and kills a guy roughly 3 years later :D

Peak dynamic btw. He can be your angle or yuor devil. As long as he's behind over your shoulder 👍

"I learned my passion in the Good Old Fashioned School of Loverboys"

Thankyou homoverse they made Pantalone a certified Yapper. Him and Loverboy are just the "Talks a lot" vs "Listens" ship

No caption. This was just funni

Hey guys can anyone tell that I love a good corruption arc.

Despite his increasingly worsening state of ethics, don't forget that deep down hes still going to be a sopping wet meowmeow💕

Idk blame @/eluxcastar riri they put the devil's temptation thoughts into my brain

[oroontheheels]

Daddy’s gonna be real honest with you kittens.

I’m disappointed with current Venom Run. Let me be real CLEAR here. I don’t hate it. I don’t have beef with its creator. So for a long period of time I was telling everyone “it’s a mess, but it’s better that Donnie Cates”.

But I think comparing them is not correct and let me explain why.

So Donnie Cates. Our boy. Extra edgy, made some terrifically BAD retcons, hated symbrock, tried to make Eddie Brock as trad as possible (giving him human son and all). Plus he ignored the fact that Sleeper was a child of Venom and Eddie. “nOt BioLoGiCalLy” Eddie’s but he called Eddie “father” and they both deeply cared about each other. So Donnie Cates couldn’t allow this either.

But! Donnie Cates while fighting the yaoi made the story ironically even more gayer. It was a train wreck but at the end of the day at least it was fun to laugh at this “closeted shipper” as I like to call him.

And most importantly? At the end they were still “Venom family”. All 4 of them. In Donnie Cates comics.

Now Al Ewing and Ram V… It was… ok. I like Dylan, I like Venom, I like Sleeper. I didn’t like that they “killed” Eddie right at the start of the story and sent him running solo trough time traveling shenanigans. I liked him interacting with Doctor Doom. I liked Meridus being gay with Kang and with that one old man.

But what I lacked is interactions between Venom and Eddie. They almost didn’t interact.

But like, okay. Let Eddie do his thing, let Venom singlemom it out. Also did I mention Ewing and V made Dylan Venom’s son? That was NICE. That’s I liked. A LOT.

And immideatly got my hops up.

Which was a mistake.

So the problem is where Donnie was closeted shipper, I’m starting to believe that Ewing and V don’t actually see Venom and Eddie as a romantic partnership. Or even all that important partnership.

If you check Spider Man Venom War comics, Venom talks A LOT about how much “Saint Peter”(Parker) means to him. It’s very gay very romantic very deep. But at the next pages it also downgraded Eddie role in Venoms life?? Venom is like “so yeah Peter taught me to save lives so I saved Eddie from offfing himself”. And that’s almost it. No emphasis on their bond, on Eddie’s feelings, of their bond. Almost nothing, really.

And now it’s Venom War and Venom says “wow Peter and I are sooo perfect, also it feels nice punching Eddie in the face”.

So what. Venom hates Eddie now? After all those years of forgiveness?? And it wasn’t elaborated in the slightest??

I would hate it but I WOULD understand if they wanted to make Parker new host for Venom for a while. But they don’t?? Apparently Al Ewing planing to give Venom new host (all of the candidates SUCK for the role btw). And if I understood one of his interviews correctly he want to send all the characters their separate ways.

Here’s the statement

Which annoyed me. A LOT. Like i understand that cis hetero males bring all the money to Marvel. We little faggots don’t bring so much cash. So our feelings and wants are not important. But isn’t there big ass FANDOM for symbrock? People who advertise comics for free with their art and activities?? Are we not important whatsoever? And on top of that wasn’t EVERYONE celebrating when Eddie got Venom back (in 2016)?? Don’t we all love homoerotic weird ass bond these two have??

And what does it even mean “yeah it’s been a while since Eddie and Venom have been together”. It wasn’t. Donnie Cates first made Venom into amnesiac DOG, then sent him into exile and then kept him and Eddie from having meaningful interaction until the very end of his run. Everyone who loves symbrock were STARVING.

And Al Ewing and Ram V story separated Eddie into his own story line.

And now Al Ewing tilling us “yeah it’s been too long, it’s time to move on”.

It’s like giving starving person a cup of water and saying “well now you are fed, let’s go on a 20km hike”.

“My work here is done” Tuxedo Mask meme

So like… yeah.

If they’ll make Sleeper a traitor this will be so bad. This will drop from 6/10 to 0/10 immediately.

Not looking forward to Venom future.

And the WORST part? I feel like they are pulling out “this relationship is toxic so it’s cancelled” card on symbrock. They never do that on hetero ships, but they happily destroy gay ships with that argument.

It sucks.

I hope I’m wrong. But like Venom gets new host this December. There’s not much room left to give us decent amount of Symbrock IF writers even want that.

[candaru]

just gonna ramble about some Ultrakill/Portal crossover thoughts don't mind me

(considering The End of All Known Land canon for these thoughts, i.e. a world where Gabriel and V1 are the only ones to get out of Hell)

Chell hates robots with all her soul and would try to fucking annihilate V1 if she thought they posed even a sliver of a threat but V1 would be so fucking excited at the prospect of another human. like obviously if they were still in a situation where they needed blood, they'd kill her without a second thought, but now? they're just FASCINATED by the question of "how did a human SURVIVE" and they want to know everything

V1 inner monologue: oh boy a new sparring partner!!! wow they have a cool new kind of gun I've never seen before!! that would've been soooo helpful back in hell. I wonder if that's how they escaped? and they're quiet just like me! I wonder if their organic voicebox is broken? or do they just not have one? can humans not have one?

GLaDOS would fucking despise Gabriel because he's sooooo full of himself. She doesn't even need to hear him say anything robot-racist, She's already decided She hates him and wants him dead. an "angel?" yeah, right. sounds just like another human ripe for the picking. let's see how high-and-mighty you are when you're in my TESTING DOMAIN! DO MY PUZZLES, BOY!!!

Gabriel is like wow this robot is stuck up and has some serious issues but also I am uncomfortable with how much of myself I see reflected in her. hmmmm. yeah I'll try your puzzle, tell me more about your deep-seated hatred of organics and particularly this one that keeps ruining the facility you run and is the only one to ever beat you in a fight. mhm. yeah so quick question have you ever thought about trying to fuck—

(EXPLOSION AND GUNFIRE)

meanwhile if Chell ever met Gabriel on the surface it'd make for such a good tense encounter. bc she is hiding behind a tree in full fight-or-flight mode wondering "how did another human SURVIVE" and also second question "how did they get such sickass wings and where can I get a pair?"

and then Gabriel noticing her would ALSO send him into fight-or-flight mode but only for a moment because of the pure shock of, again, "HOW DID A HUMAN SURVIVE" before curiosity completely overtakes him and he tries to talk to her. trying to get her to talk and not attack or run is like trying to coax a wild injured animal out of a hiding spot. but he eventually manages to earn the barest, most minimal amount of trust by setting down all his weapons and leaving offerings of food in front of her.

...this gets harder when she sees Gabriel and V1 together and registers that they're allies. she's unsure if they're plotting against her or if V1 is manipulating Gabriel. eventually she leans towards the latter and thinks her fears are confirmed when she witnesses them drawing Gabriel's blood while he's sleeping.

she tries to communicate this to him by drawing crude pictures on the ground and is VERY FRUSTRATED when he's like "omg can you not talk? that's ok!! V1 also can't talk but we make it work, they're really incredibly kind and patient and—"

Chell, internally: I AM GOING TO KILL THAT FUCKING ROBOT AND SAVE YOU

I think it would be funny for V1 to try and go urban exploring in Aperture. GLaDOS is initially all excited because a new testing robot literally fell right into Her clutches but then V1 proceeds to be the most stubborn, impudent, tenacious piece of shit and they remind her WAY TOO MUCH OF CHELL so now She's trying to kill them but they have ACTUAL FUCKING GUNS and Aperture is being destroyed in the wake of their battle

meanwhile V1 has decided they don't like this robot but also She makes fun tests. so they do puzzles until they get bored and then they blast holes through the wall and try to kill Her

something something Ultrakill is just Portal for NBs (everyone knows Portal is for women) and I'm so fascinated by the similar dynamics of the toxic yuri/toxic yaoi robot-and-human pairs. and I think they would mostly hate each other and I love that for them.

(also something something GLaDOS is too far gone, too corrupted in Her immortality, and too deep in denial for any possible healthy ending with Chell—it's just not possible. so seeing Gabriel and V1 in a healthy and loving relationship would make Her SO FUCKING MAD for reasons She can't articulate)