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#we watched other movies too that year was so messy
sainns · 2 days
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DROP THE ALBUM!ㅤ⊹ㅤPSH SMAU
PROLOGUE the breakup and afterwards
note i lied this did not come out at 330 im impatient and uhh he kinda did u dirty i apologize but yn is maybe a little dramatic IDK
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“i think we should break up, yn,”
you blink, lifting your head up from where it was resting on his chest. your sudden movement knocks the laptop off of sunghoon’s lap, the movie you were watching continuing to play in the background as you stare at him.
“what? wait—are you serious?”
he sighs, running a hair through his messy hair, “yeah, i am,”
“that’s so random. we’re literally cuddling in your bed right now, sunghoon,”
you shouldn’t be getting angry with him, if he wants to break up then he’s allowed to—even if it hurts you more than anything. it just doesn’t make any sense as to why he wants to.
you can’t wrap your head around it, as far you know—or knew—you were perfectly fine. you’ve been together for three years, so obviously you’ve fought but it’s not like they were big fights. everything in your relationship was good. at least you thought it was, sunghoon didn’t apparently.
“i don’t know... i was just thinking, you know?”
you stare at him blankly because no, you didn’t know. you don’t get what’s going on at all.
you can see discomfort makes its way onto sunghoon’s face, his hand coming up to rub his neck awkwardly, “we should take a break,”
“a break or break up?” you ask, “they’re different things,”
you fully move away from him, pulling your legs from out of the covers, sitting as far away from him as you can. you stare at the floor as you wait for his response. he’s silent for too long and you can feel your heart sink to your stomach.
“break up, i guess. we can still be friends, though,” he reaches forward to grab your hand but you pull away, “i don’t want to lose you, yn,”
there’s a lot of things you want to say to say to him; that you can’t be friends, that he’s stupid for thinking that you would be fine with it. you want to tell him that you’re mad at him beyond belief for doing this out of nowhere. he could’ve at least broken up with you when you weren’t laying in his bed. 
you don’t say any of these things, though. instead you nod, giving him a forced smile, “okay. if that’s what you want,”
“i’m really—”
you interrupt him before he can give you that dreaded apology, “i’m gonna go, i probably shouldn’t stay the night like we planned,”
you crawl out of bed, your feet landing on his carpeted floor. your back is to him and you hope and pray that he can’t hear the sharp breath slip from your mouth, keeping yourself from bursting out sobbing. you blink quickly, forcing your tears away and move around his room to grab your things.
“you don’t have to leave, it’s late,”
“it’s fine, hoon,” it’s not fine, “night,”
“okay.. text me when you get home?”
“yeah, sure.”
sunghoon is an idiot.
he's an idiot that you’re still friends with.
it’s been five months since the breakup and you’re still friends. you don’t want to be friends, but your desire to keep him in your life overpowers that. giselle and winter have both been telling you to move on, to cut him out of your life.
every single one of your friends can see how awful this is for you, especially with sunghoon still acting like he’s your boyfriend. it’s like nothing has changed between you two if you ignore the fact that you aren’t officially together anymore.
he even goes as far as to tell you about girls that he finds attractive. does he not know not to tell you stuff like? he doesn’t. he doesn’t get how horrible and heartbreaking it is for you to hear. having to sit there and hear him call other girls pretty is worse than anything you’ve ever had to experience, you think.
so after urging from both giselle and winter, you ghost him on the sixth month after your breakup. you don’t go to any of your previously planned hangouts (you give him some half-assed excuse about being ‘too busy’ when really you were just staying home and eating ice cream), you stop responding to his messages and eventually he stops sending them.
and you write about it.
you’ve written songs about him before, as embarrassing as it is to admit, but it’s how you express your feelings. the only difference is that they were love songs; songs about you pining over the boy, how you felt during your relationship, all of the good things about him. you’ve never written anything bad, not even during your first big argument.
you admittedly feel better after you’ve written everything down, but you also feel.. guilty. it’s like you’re making it a bigger deal than it is. it’s not like he cheated on you or neglected you or whatever other awful thing other songwriters have written about. he just broke up with you and tried to stay friends.
you eventually get over that guilt, thankfully. you know that you’re allowed to be upset and it’s not like he’s ever going to hear it. you’re sure he’s forgotten all about you already. maybe he even has a new girlfriend.
you try not to throw up at that thought.
you end up making a demo, send it to your agency, and it gets produced. after a month of promotion and teasers, it releases on the ninth of april. exactly one year after your break up. it blows up, much to your surprise—you weren’t necessarily a big artist but you weren’t super small, having around 840k monthly listeners but you weren’t expecting to make the billboard hot 100.
honestly, you should’ve expected sunghoon to find out about the song, but you weren’t. and needless to say, you were absolutely horrified when he sent you a message for the first time in half a year.
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lunaekalenda · 3 months
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"Our first kiss was here." Satoru speaks while walking by your hand, stopping in front of one of the Jujutsu High entrances, decorated with big wood doors and high trees. You remember it, a specially hot day of summer, right before entering work, some years ago.
"I was so nervous, and the kiss was so messy..." Satoru frowns at your words, turning to face you. Your hand is still caged on his big one, and he takes the glasses away to look directly into your eyes.
"Messy? I remember it was really cute." He sits on a near bench, pulling you to sit on his lap. You feel your cheeks heating up as he starts to speak. "You were so cute that day... Well, you're always cute." Your laugh makes him smile, his hands running up and down your hips, his breath tickling your nape and his heart racing as much as yours. Spring is about to arrive, and the mountains are vivid green, decorated with explosions of pink and lavender. A sweet breeze takes away the hotness of the sun and plays with Satoru's white hair. He sighs.
"That day I wanted to say so many things to you, but still I was unable. I wanted to take your hands on this exact bench and just let everything escape. Lucky you today we have plenty of time, and I have way more things to say." His voice makes you turn towards him with curiosity, and he smiles, taking a hand to your cheek while the other keeps you balanced by your hips. "I wanted to tell you how much I liked you. How adorable is whenever you can't find a spot to leave your bicycle when you arrive, how cute you look when you apply chapstick quickly before entering work. I wanted to let you know that I could see you sleep for hours and that when you wake up, dressed in golden sun rays by my side, I feel the luckiest man alive. Because, from everyone in the world, you decided to share it with me. And you can't even imagine how big that is, love. You chose me. You always let me know the reason why you cry, and you let me calm you and assure you until I can see your smile again. You open yourself for me, you trust me and I keep that as a treasure. I'm able to hold you on your best days, but also on your worsts." Satoru kisses your shoulder before speaking again. "I could hear you speak about that novel you're reading for hours if that means you're gonna speak passionately about something you enjoy, and I will carry you to bed again and again, every single day you fall asleep watching a movie or playing a game on the couch. I will leave the blanket on your side when we sleep because I know you can't fall asleep if you're cold, and I will always keep an extra sugar cube on my pocket because you like your coffee sweet." your eyes feel teary, and he takes the first tear away with his thumb. The way he looks at you is so pure, so full of love and admiration, you can't take your eyes away from him. You take air. Your feelings feel way too big for your chest, and pressing your lips to his, you try to tell him everything you can't reach with words. How much you love him, how grateful you are, how lucky you feel to be able to spend your life with him. He kisses you back, hungrily, desperately, making you feel that he understood you and that he feels the same. He parts shortly, caressing your hips back, before standing up. "Let's go home, love. I still have a lot of things to say, a lot of things to show and a lot of things to do to you. "
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08luvmailz · 5 months
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꧔ SOFT MORNINGS — ! ❪Gojo Satoru❫ — 𓄹 ࣪ ִֶָ 
HOMEBODY BOYFRIEND AU! 𓂅 satoru became lazy because of you ❪you just baby him too much❫
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Satoru Gojo's life was simple to say the least.
He wakes up early in the morning then sleeps again after he did, only to be awaken again by his stupid alarm geto gifted him. He brushes his teeth, take a quick shower, leaves his comforter and bed messy. Eats half burnt toast and ready to go and teach young ungrateful brats.
He doesnt stay that much at home cause its boring, he always went out with his friends everyday.
To say this, his life cycle went on like that for the past...... 8-9 years give or take. its not that long, its just... time was too fast for his liking.
It all change because of you, could he blame himself liking the new principal's hot flamming cheetos of a secretary. You are so different, so refreshing to his eyes. You care about his ungrateful students, gives free coffee and cookies to the teachers once or twice a week and you cared about him.
It didn't take long for him to hit you up and knock you down.
He loved you so much and you do too, because of you everything change in his eyes. he start to care a little bit about his job just to see you walking down with that pencil skirt, eyeing you up and down. That would be a story for another time...
His morning routine changed too... from sleeping to waking up to sleeping again
Became.... awaking early just too see your sleeping face, admiring you, wiping that drool dripping from his naked chest. caressing your silky hair tangled because of idle moving, he was inlove.
Waking you up with kisses and feeling you giggle was a dream to him, how did he landed such an angel (be grateful to me gojo/hj)
Him teasing her daily from not getting up, her trying to carry his large ass figure to the bathroom. Only for her to give up and leave him teasingly, chasing each other then giving such loving wet kisses on each other's face. A dream...
Satoru became a lazy ass person. I mean he IS LAZY but became LAZIERZ to his girlfriend.
To the point you are the one whose brushing his teeth, straddling his waist and him supporting you from the counter. Looking lovingly to you while you brush his teeth gently, caressing your waist.
Being quite touchy but non-sexual shower schedule everyday, scrubbing his hair while him lathering soap to your body.
Everyday was movie night, watching the movies he recommended and his friends recommended. Watching you cook for the two of you, calculating bills and stacking folders of important documents at his apartment, Reading books together he doesnt read them he just watch you read them Having a mini concert every saturday at the shower, him trying to belt a high note COMPLETY FAILED.
Inviting his friends for dinner and bonding together, him meeting your parents when they visit the city.
In summary, we love a HOMEBODY BOYFRIEND !
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guccifrog · 4 months
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WRONG NUMBER P6
matt sturniolo x fem!reader
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thoughts on this one??😣
y/n pov
As I stood in front of the mirror, lost in my thoughts, I couldn't help but feel anxious. My heart was pounding, my palms sweaty. I watched my reflection carefully, trying to convince myself that I looked presentable enough. My hair was tied back in a messy bun, my makeup subtle but enough to accentuate my features. I glanced down at my outfit - a simple black tank top and a pair of sweatpants.
I was starting to rethink my whole life at this point I mean what if he's just an old fucker wanting to see my tattas You could never know :/
A text notification interrupted my thoughts and I looked down to see a message from him. My heart skipped a beat as I recognized his name flash across my screen.
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I sighed for what seemed like the millionth time this night, a bitch was nervous but again it was too late to pussy out so without another thought I took a deep breath before finally taping the button
as the ringtone played a wave of anxiety washed over me. My mind started racing, and my heart was pounding so loud I thought he would be able to hear it from the other side of the phone. I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down, but it was no use. I was a nervous wreck.
Finally, the call connected. "Hey" I managed to squeak out, my voice barely audible even to my ears. There was a brief pause on the other end of the line, and then I heard him let out a shaky breath. "Hey," he replied, his voice sounding equally as nervous as I felt.
Something about his tone was so calming, it was as if all the anxiety that had been building up inside me suddenly melted away.
I took another deep breath and mustered up the courage to speak. "can you turn your camera on ?," I asked softly, I was feeling a bit silly but also strangely reassured.
He hesitated for a moment, but then finally replied, "If I do it then you gotta do it too"
"yeah, alright, in… 3…2…1" I said, as I counted down. A split second later, The screen flashes to life, revealing my face on the other end of the video call.
"HOLY SHIT-"I was cut off by him as he started giggling.
i hate myself for yelling that but what the actual fuck I think I just nutted I did not expect this man to be this yummy looking, I quickly composed myself as I realize i was staring at him like a creep.
"damn you weren't joking when you said you look like a rat," he says with a smirk making me roll my eyes.
the audacity of this bitch "Shut up" i muttered under my breath, I take a moment to take him in properly now that I'm not in a state of shock. His hair is a mess of dark brown curls that fall over his forehead and his eyes are a piercing shade of blue that seems to stare right through me. His lips are full and pink, damn this man is a snack.
"but seriously your eyes are so pretty, i was not expecting that" he blurts out and my cheeks heat up immediately. I've never been good with compliments. "well, uhh, thanks?" I manage to say. He laughs again, and the sound is like music to my ears.
"So?" he asks, his voice soft.
"bitch don't "So" me you were literally moaning my name a few weeks ago"i reminded him with a small grin, I can't help but feel a bit flustered still. "but uh, yeah, wanna see Stinky's grave? " I ask.
the rest of the night was a blur, honestly. we talked about the most random things. we found out that we had so many things in common. our favorite foods, movies, and music. This may sound corny but it was like we had known each other for years, not just a few weeks.
taglist :
@nickenthusiast @chrisfavoritepepsi @sunsetsturniolos @littlebookworm803 @sturniozo @sturniolooooo @athahliahxoxo @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @ev3rgreenxtrees @nonamegirlxsturniolo @crybabycat1 @mooniethesimp31 @ducksturniolo @ifilwtmfc @pepsiimaxx @sleepysturnss @lustfulslxt @ilovemattsworld @hrt-attack @flowerxbunnie @leprechaunbirthdaygirl @secret-sturniolo @iluvmeeen
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g4yforethan · 8 months
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love language
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pairing: ethan landry x male!reader
summary: ethan and reader have fun on halloween night !
warnings: cursing, smut, top!ethan, bottom!reader
a/n: hii this is from a request so i tried my best ! also im so excited for halloween this year for some reason
it was halloween night and tara and anika had invited you to a halloween party and since you had no other plans going on that night, you figured why not? your boyfriend ethan landry was also going and you didn't want to feel left out or let him go by himself so you went with him. you got there and talked with tara and mindy and soon the three of you started taking shots together. after 2 shots, you started to feel a little sick and went over to ethan. “hey baby whats wrong?” you tell him how you feel and he walks you out. “hey how about we just go home instead?” “yeah if that’s okay with you ethan.” “of course baby let’s go.”
you two walk back to your apartment which helped you get rid of the annoying nausea you felt. once you came back, the two of you walked to your bed and sat down. “thanks for waking back with me.” “oh come on i wasn’t gonna leave you there was i?” you laughed and gave him a kiss on the lips. you realized it was just the two of you alone since you shared the apartment with chad as well. you looked at ethan who gave you the same look. you two kiss again and more and more. he picked you up and had you on his lap. you kiss his neck and he starts to take your shirt off.
“fuck you’re so beautiful.” he whispers in your ear which turns you on even more. you take his shirt off and start to leave hickies all over his neck and chest. he rolls his eyes back and grabs onto your hair. “ethan i want you inside of me.” his face turns red but he listens and lays you on your stomach. he licks yours hole for several minutes before teasing you with his tip. he goes in slowly grabbing you waist and massaging your back. “fuck ethan.” “you like that baby boy?” “yes baby.” each stroke he gave became more intense for you. he goes even faster as you start to arch your back. your roll your eyes back and moan in pleasure which turned ethan on even more. ethan turns you on your back and puts his dick back inside. he grabs your neck and kisses you while he goes faster and faster.
"i wanna ride your dick." you tell ethan as he positions himself on his back. you start to ride which sends an overload of pleasure into your body. you feel ethan's heavy breathing and sweat come onto you as you keep riding. he whimpers and moans in your ear. "fuck y/n i'm close." "cum inside of me baby." he moans as he fills your body with his cum. he kisses your neck as you cum not too long after. you kiss him and lay on his chest while he starts to play with your hair. "fuck y/n i guess those 2 shot really brought out something in you huh?" you laugh and playfully hit him. "whatever ethan. guess i was your treat with no tricks." ethan laughs and slightly cringes at your joke and gives you another kiss on your head.
a knock on the door interrupts you and ethan's pillow talk."hey ethan, y/n, i'm back! are you guys in here?" it was chad who had come back from the halloween party."uhh yeah we were just watching a movie together nothing much." chad seemed intrigued. "oo which movie? chucky? friday the 13th?""yeah one of those listen just give us 5 minutes." he was confused but obliged. you rush to put your clothes back on and leave the room. you run into chad who notices your messy hair. "did you just take a shower or is that sweat?" "uhh it's just sweat it's really hot in here." the temperature read 65 degrees. ethan comes out and asks chad if he could grab something from the lobby. chad leaves and a big sigh of relief rushes through you and ethan's body. the two of you kiss and laugh at the whole thing.
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whorekneecentral · 6 months
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Miss Me, Miss Me
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Ruben Dias x Stones!Fem!Reader
Warnings: fwb!ruben, jack and reader are besties, alcohol and the consumption of, kyle is always annoying her, teasing, a strip tease according to reader, finger sucking, oral (f!receiving), overstimulation, fingering, orgasm denial, the use of 'whore' in a sexual/degrading context, penetrative sex (P in V ), big brother john is not having it.
Word Count: 2,952
Author's Note: this one is written solely for my pookie, that's also why ruben is so early on in this series lmao - all of these things are shit she'd eat up so pooks and everyone else, please enjoy :)
merry smutmas series
--
Your brother holds his annual Christmas party and you’re forced to spend the afternoon with the one person you had been avoiding all season but tis’ the season you guess. 
Will they or won't they was the tagline for your relationship - if you could even call it that- with Ruben.
You had recently moved to Manchester to be closer to your older brother and your niece and nephew. You had gone to every home game you could and over the course of the season, you fell into a bit of a pattern with the Portuguese defender.
It was innocent enough at first, you two were friends who occasionally hooked up to relieve whatever stress you were having but over the years, it turned into more. Feelings got involved and it got messy so because of that, and for your brother's sake - despite him not knowing, you pulled away from Ruben.
It was never your intention to make things messy.
You hadn't seen Ruben face to face in weeks, if not months. You had still gone to games but you simply went for your brother and then left afterwards, not hanging around too long.
Ruben had a hold over you; you knew if you hung around him too long, you'd just end up in his bed again. That was the last thing you wanted.
Today was unavoidable though.
John was hosting his annual Christmas party at his place; old friends, a few of the boys from his time at Barnsley as well as his teammates and their families from Man City filled his house.
You were somehow, always on kid duty. You were in the room with a bunch of kids; Kevin's, John's, Phil's, Ederson's and a few others that you had no idea who they belonged to.
"Settle down," you tell them, trying to get them off the sugar rush to watch a movie. You tried to rock your nephew in one arm while you switched on the tv, the kids shouting 400 different movie titles all at once.
You huffed and your nephew began to cry just as you tried to ask which one they really wanted to watch but someone opened the door. Jack smiles at you, taking the remote from you when he sees how flustered you are.
He worked a miracle, getting them to quiet down enough for you to calm the baby and to be able to put on a movie for them. You sighed, sitting on the bean bag with the baby as the kids watched Finding Nemo.
Jack sits next to you, rubbing the baby's hand. "I heard the noise, figured I'd come check before they killed you," he whispered, making you chuckle.
"You're a lifesaver, Jack, really. You're good with them too, you and Sasha ever think of.."
"No," he laughed, shaking his head. "I mean, at least not yet."
You nod, smiling. "You'd be wonderful parents.. but you should go join the party, I'm okay in here."
"You're sure?" He gets up and you nod. "Go on, I'll come out in a bit." Jack smiles, nodding before he walks out and closes the door behind him.
It was about an hour later that Finding Nemo ended and the kids went looking for their parents. Those with kids ended up heading out, saying their goodnights before the party actually picks up.
You make your way into the kitchen to find Jack looking for something. "Missing something?" You asked, picking up a glass.
"Your brother said he had shot glasses somewhere?"
"Check the bottom cabinet, it should be in there. What are we drinking?" You asked, setting your empty glass back down.
"Whatever will get us drunk fast." He laughs and you smile, "you're just like me," you nudged his shoulder, reaching for the bottle of tequila on the counter.
Jack lines the empty shot glasses on the tray you found, letting you fill them up. The man picks one up before handing another one to you. "To.. the holidays!" He shrugs, tapping his glass to yours before you two down the shots, and two more rounds after that.
You send him on his way, the man dancing his way over to his girlfriend. You on the other hand, picked up the tray and made the rounds, offering shots to all of those who wanted them. Eventually, you find your way to the living room, the music playing in the background as some people danced and the others chatted.
"Pebbles!" Kyle shouts, his hand in the air to call you over. You roll your eyes, walking over to the group of men by the couch. "How many times have I told you not to call me that, walks?" You laughed.
Kyle puts an arm around your shoulder, giving it a squeeze. "You're pebbles cause Johnny is Stones and you're the little one!"
You laughed, shaking your head. "Very original, Kyle. Anyone want a shot?" You offered, holding the tray out.
John takes one, passing another one to Ruben who you've yet to look at. Kyle grabs one for himself and you go to walk away but your brother grabs your arm, bringing you back. John's arm is over your shoulder now, pulling you into his side.
"Have one with us! You're grown up now, aren't you?" He teased, nudging you to take a shot with them. You and John were only a few years apart; he was 29 and you were 24.
You nod, picking up a shot glass. "Cheers!" Kyle shouts over the music, the 4 of you tapping your glasses together before downing the contents.
Some of the tequila ended up on your fingers during the toast, your finger instinctively ended up between your lips and you don't miss the feeling of Ruben's eyes on you. Looking up, your eyes meet his and you move your hand.
"Can I go now?" You asked your brother, and he nodded before kissing your temple. "You're free to go. Go eat something before you feel sick though."
"Should take your own advice, Stones." You tell him and he tosses you a glare. "Whatever, pebbles."
Kyle and John laugh at the use of the nickname and you flip them both off, laughing as you walk away.
The night turned out to be good, you ended up hanging out with Jack and Sasha for a bit before Kyle pulled you to dance with him. He was telling John he knows how to waltz, he just needed a good partner. You were confused as to what made you qualify as a good partner but you went along with it.
At this point, everyone had left and whoever was left, was drunk as fuck and on the verge of passing out.
You slowly make your way upstairs, you have just put away the leftovers and locked the front door for the night. You walked into your room for the night, unzipping your dress as you bent over to pull some pjs out of your bag.
The knob turns and then the door unlocked, someone steps in. "Hello, what the fuck? I'm changing-" you freeze when you turn around to see who it is.
Ruben stood by the door. "It's just me."
"Okay and?" You look at him, confused as to why he's in your room. "Just because it's you, doesn't mean that gives you a right to be in here."
"It's nothing I haven't seen before, love." He smiles at you and you resist the urge to roll your eyes when he says that.
"Fuck off, will you?" You turn away from the man, your back to him as you went to get changed for bed.
Ruben doesn't take no for an answer; in life and on the pitch. He walks over to you, "don't be like that, y/n. You know I miss you," his hand rests on your hip, pulling you to him.
It was so easy for him - your mind is screaming no but your body's betraying you, giving into him before you could stop yourself.
"You don't miss me, Ruben. Shut up." You whispered, the man lowered his lips to your neck. A trail of kisses from the base of your neck up to your jaw, you're certain there's red marks all over your neck from his beard scratching on you.
Your hand instinctively reaches for his face, your palm's warm against his skin; there your body goes, betraying you again.
"I miss you, I do," he whispers against your skin, his hand sliding between the two of you, from your hip to your back. The fact that your dress was unzipped gave him free rein, his fingers running along your spine, finally resting on the curve of your spine.
"Rubes-" you breathe, feeling him suck on the sensitive spot on your neck. "We can't."
He nods, "we can."
"John could walk in."
The thought made Ruben chuckle. Yes, it'd be a mess, it would get both of you in a lot of trouble but the fact that you, at your grown age, were scared of your older brother catching you with his friend, was funny to him.
"John's passed out drunk on the couch, sweetheart. No one's coming, it's just me and you."
You turn to face the man, Ruben's chest to yours; the first few buttons of his shirt undone, the black fabric tight on his arms and the sleeve were rolled up to his elbows. Was he always such a slut or did he only recently become one?
He's already pulling the straps of your dress off your shoulders and you don't stop him, letting it fall to the floor and pool around your ankles.
Ruben's hands reach for your face, cupping your jaw. "C'mon baby, I miss you." He whispers into the quiet room, his lips ghosting over yours.
Hands wrapping around his wrists, "I miss you too." You admit, giving into him. You pull Ruben into you, kissing him.
It doesn't take long, the two of you stumbling back to the bed. Ruben ends up on top of you, your legs wrapped around him as he moves you to lay properly. He pulls away from your kiss and your wandering hands, earning him a pout.
"Why'd you stop?" You groaned, Ruben smiles at you whining as he stands, undoing the rest of the buttons on his shirt before taking it off.
You propped yourself up on your elbows, looking at the man. "Mhm, all for me?" You raised your eyebrows, making him laugh.
"Everything's for you, baby. It always is." He tells you, dropping to his knees in front of you.
The words and his actions made your head spin, you were constantly swooning over the man and today was no exception.
Ruben's lips were soft, the faintest of kisses trailed up from your calf to your thigh and he let your leg hang over his shoulder as he pulled you to the edge of the bed. You’ve propped yourself up on your elbows to look at him and Ruben drags his fingers up your thigh, moving to your clothed pussy. 
"Please," you mumble, looking down at the man. Ruben smiles, "not in the mood for teasing, sweetheart?"
"Fuck you Ruben," you groaned, dropping back into the mattress when he pulls the panties to the side, his eyes fixed on your pussy but his hand reaches up, pushing two fingers in your mouth. He didn’t have to tell you, your tongue laps over his fingers. 
“Taught you well,” he smiles, pulling his fingers away from your mouth. 
He gives you no warning, pushing his fingers into you. The sound leaving your mouth was like heaven on earth to him. 
His fingers curl upwards, your back arching at the feeling. 
“Rube, please.” Your hand reaches down to wrap on his wrist but he swats your hand away, managing to pull both to rest on your stomach and his free hand over your hands, pinning them to your stomach. 
Your eyes fixed on the man between your legs, looking at him in awe. Something about Ruben fascinated you; you could never put your finger on it but he was always an object of fascination, of desire. Everything about him made you want him, you couldn't explain the attraction.
It just made sense to you.
Your hips buck when you feel his tongue against your clit, your hand gripping on his hair. 
Ruben knew you like the back of his hand, even with the time apart. Something didn't change and the way your hips buck, it's your way of saying you want more, who was Ruben not to give into you?
His fingers curl upwards once again and he glances up to see your head tossed back into the mattress, eyes fluttering shut.
Between his fingers and his tongue, your orgasm was teetering on the edge; he knew that much. 
Ruben pulls his hands away, the sticky fingers on your thighs. A whimper leaves your lips at the loss of fullness. 
"What the fuck?" You groaned, an arm over your face. If you looked at Ruben right now, you might kill him.
The clink of his belt gets your attention - maybe you'd finally get what you wanted.
Ruben scoots you back, getting on the bed, on top of you. He leans down, his lips over yours and you reach up, a hand on the back of his neck to pull him down for a kiss; you can taste yourself on his lips. He lifts your leg, resting on your hip before he lines himself up with you.
The way the tip of his cock rubbed against you and the fact that you were already on the edge from before was enough to make you beg.
"Please, Ruben."
"Please what?" He looks down at you, smiling sweetly.
Your bottom lip pulled between your teeth. "Ruben," you whined, lifting your hips towards him. "Please, fuck- god just fuck me already."
Ruben smiles, "those words really shouldn't be in the same sentence, you know." He tells you, pushing into you. You moan, ignoring his words at the moment.
Your hand wraps around his bicep, your manicured nails digging into his skin. He didn't mind the pain, especially if it was your doing.
Your legs wrapped around his waist, Ruben's thrusts were slow and deep- you can feel him everywhere, his hands, his lips, his touch. Everything about Ruben was consuming; he knew that and he loved it.
In some sick way, he loved watching you fall in love with him all over again, seeing the effect he had on you.
Ruben pulls your legs back up to his hip. “Fuck,” you breathe, his thrusts faster and harder.
How you wished you could scream his name right now.
His hand drops between the two of you, rubbing your clit; matching the pace of his hips. Your head falls back into the pillows when he hits the spot he was looking for. His fingers that were previous on your clit now shoved into your mouth to muffle the sounds tumbling from your lips.
Ruben leans down, his lips next to your ear; “you have to be quiet, you don't want everyone to know what a whore you are, do you?”
You mumble something along an okay, your hips bucking, telling him you want more. He holds you, managing to flip you two over so that you're on top and his cock is still buried in you.
He lets you take over, setting the pace and using him for your own pleasure.
“Ruben, god-” you mumble, your hand tangled in his dark hair as you bounced up and down.
"Not quite," he whispers, pulling you down to kiss along your neck. Ruben's hand behind your neck to pull you down for a kiss. “Want you to cum for me.”
His arms wrap around you when you drop against him, your face buried against his shoulder, biting down to muffle the sounds. “Good girl,” he hums, rubbing your back. "Mhm I love you." He whispers into your shoulder.
You huff, "shut up, don't ruin this for me." Ruben laughs, "whatever you say, baby. I do."
"I'm so thirsty," you get off of him, yawning.
Ruben looks over at you, "you want another round?" You roll your eyes, "not what I meant, you freak."
You get up, pulling on his shirt and a pair of shorts. Ruben lays in bed, watching as you buttoned it up. "Don't look at me like that." You tell him and he laughs, "like what, love?"
"Like you want to fuck me."
"I just did," he smiles. You roll your eyes again, something you did often in his presence. "I'm going to get water," you tell him before heading down the stairs.
When your brother hears the creaking on the stairs, he sits up, rubbing his eyes before looking over in your direction. "Y/n?"
"Johnny?" You freeze, looking at him.
"Whose shirt is that?" He asks and you look down at the black button up. "Uh, mine."
John nods, dropping down onto the couch once again. You grab the bottle of water, walking back into the living room to toss the blanket over your brother. You lean down, kissing his head before turning to head back towards the stairs.
He reaches out from under the blanket, grabbing your hand to stop you. "You better get Ruben out of my house before I get up, or I'll kill him."
"I have no idea what you're talking about," you tell him and your brother lets go of your hand, a sly smile on his face. "Yeah, okay. Maybe you two should shut up next time, or don't do it in my house? Perhaps don't wear a shirt that reeks of his cologne."
"Shut up, go back to sleep," you push him back into the couch before walking away.
--
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sugawarassoulmate · 2 years
Text
we've been doin' all this late night talkin'
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you flounder in the living room for a second, taking a glance at how the storm doesn’t seem to be letting up at all. akaashi notices this, and the time. it’s past midnight and he’s certain the trains aren’t running anymore. he can’t let a young girl like you venture out into the night all by herself, but a drive back to your place in this weather isn’t ideal and he can’t leave his daughter alone.
“i should probably—”
“just spend the night,” akaashi interrupts. he knows you at this point, you’re much too nice to ask for a cab ride home and you’d probably rather trek through the rain than ever be a bother to anyone. “don’t argue with me on this one, i’m not letting you go out in this storm.” that’s all it takes to shut you up, nodding without another word. you’re such a good girl for always listening to him.
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paring: dilf!akaashi x babysitter!reader
words: 2.9k
cw: fem!reader, age gap (reader is in their 20s/Akaashi in his 40s), alcohol, dubious consent, slight manipulation, fingering, unprotected sex, breeding kink, pregnancy mention, minors dni
disclaimer: on this blog, we discuss and explore toxic relationships/situations/just because i write about these themes does not mean i condone/support these types of relationships nor do i do them in my own personal life.
these are fictional characters in fictional scenarios and nobody should be taking real-life advice or mirror the actions of the characters in these stories!
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He laughed after hearing the small noise you made when he opened the door, entering the dimmed living room. You were curled up on the couch, a movie playing quietly on the TV. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he says, shaking the rain from his umbrella as he removes his shoes.
As always, you were quick to apologize, a trait Akaashi always found charming. “Oh, not it’s fine. I probably shouldn’t have been watching scary movies so late at night,” you mumbled, sitting up to put the film on pause. “Kisa knocked out hours ago, by the way. I managed to convince her to remove the facepaint but she insisted on sleeping in her costume so you’ll have a witch in her bed tomorrow morning.”
Akaashi wasn’t surprised. Even at five years old, Kisa was incredibly stubborn, getting into debates (Akaashi didn’t like to call them arguments) with her father over every little thing—not wanting to eat her broccoli or refusing to wear the new sweater Akaashi bought. You, on the other hand, were the Kisa Whisperer, able to get her to compromise and not act so hot-headed.
It was a blessing when you answered his ad for a babysitter. With his job taking so much of his time, and the messy divorce with his soon-to-be-ex, having the extra help means the world to him.
It also doesn’t hurt that you were so pretty. A sweet, obedient college student with such good manners. It took Akaashi weeks to get you to stop calling him “sir,” despite how much he loved how the word came out of your soft lips. “Just call me Keiji, you don’t have to be so formal with me, sweetie.”
Akaashi places his briefcase on the dining table and sighs. “I apologize for coming home so late, I just couldn’t get out of the office, and then the storm caused traffic on the way back. I hope you girls didn’t get caught in it while trick-or-treating?”
“Oh, not at all. I was keeping a close eye on the clouds the entire time. We made it home just fine.” your voice soothes Akaashi’s nerves as he hears you getting up from the couch. “And I don’t mind. Kisa’s such a great kid, I love spending time with her. I took a bunch of photos too, I’ll send them tomorrow.”
You flounder in the living room for a second, taking a glance at how the storm doesn’t seem to be letting up at all. Akaashi notices this, and the time. It’s past midnight and he’s certain the trains aren’t running anymore. He can’t let a young girl like you venture out into the night all by herself, but a drive back to your place in this weather isn’t ideal and he can’t leave Kisa alone.
“I should probably—”
“Just spend the night,” Akaashi interrupts. He knows you at this point, you’re much too nice to ask for a cab ride home and you’d probably rather trek through the rain than ever be a bother to anyone. “Don’t argue with me on this one, I’m not letting you go out in this storm.”
That’s all it takes to shut you up, nodding without another word. You’re such a good girl for always listening to him. He reminds you that extra sheets and pillows are in the hall closet and he has some of his ex’s pajamas upstairs that you could borrow. He has no issue taking you home after he drops Kisa off at daycare. 
After he assured you that it wasn’t a problem, Akaashi could see that you were finally starting to calm down. He suggested finishing the movie you were watching before going to bed, he needed to unwind a little bit himself. Before settling on the couch, he grabs a bottle of wine from the kitchen and two glasses and places them on the coffee table. 
“I know you’re gonna want to fight me, but you’re off the clock, sweetie,” Akaashi says, putting an end to any protest you’re about to give him. “I’m not your boss right now.” He pours a glass for each of you and hands one over.
He may be old but he can tell when he’s got a woman flustered and it’s written all over your face. So cute. You hold out your glass. “Cheers?” Behave, Keiji, he thinks as both of you clink your glasses.
It turns out horror movies haven’t gotten much better in the past couple of years. Still relying on overdramatic acting and cheesy jump scares, but he figures it can’t be all that bad if it scares pretty girls like you into scooting a bit closer to him. “Did you finish your drink already, sweetheart?” You look over at your empty glass, slightly embarrassed for drinking it so quickly. “It’s okay. Here, have some more.”
You’re more receptive this time, eagerly holding your glass so he can pour more wine. He always took you for a lightweight but seeing it in person was a sight to behold. “Sorry about making you work on Halloween. I’m sure you would’ve rather gone to a party or something,” Akaashi says, taking a sip of his own drink.
“Ahhh, it’s okay,” you giggled, curling up underneath the blanket Akaashi had on the couch. “There’s always gonna be another party.”
“Oh, do you go often?” he asks, chuckling at your quirked eyebrows. “Hey, I was your age too.”
“I find that hard to believe,” you tease, taking another swig—Akaashi’s certain he’s gonna have to refill your cup once again. “I go sometimes…if class gets a bit crazy, it’s nice not to think about work.”
Akaashi’s eyes flick over to the television screen, the dumb sorority girl in the movie starts flirting with the nerd boy character. There’s another thing he remembers about these stupid movies, a cheesy sex scene. A cardinal sin, their days are definitely numbered. But he wonders if their inevitable death will scare you enough that you’ll move even closer. At this point, you’re practically in his lap although it doesn’t seem like you’re aware of it. Are you this oblivious around other people? 
“Do you have a boyfriend?” he asks without thinking, grabbing the wine bottle to refill your glass. He’s shocked and relieved when you shake your head no. “Come on, a pretty girl like you? I would think you’d have to fight these college boys off with a stick.”
Akaashi’s hand touches your thigh, gripping the soft skin. He feels the muscle twitch and a cute hum leave your lips but you don’t make a comment on it. “I don’t have time for boys,” you mumbled, eyes focused on the screen. You must be so tipsy at this point, poor thing, brain too foggy to notice the obvious jump scare that’s about to happen. It’s alright, though, the loud noise sends you leaning against him now.
“Aww, did you get scared, honey?” he coos, hand rubbing your back. Akaashi’s hand travels back to your thigh, running his fingers along the fabric of your jeans. “Are you really comfortable sleeping like that? Remember I have some extra clothes.”
“No, it’s okay. I’ll be fine…” But Akaashi isn’t having it, pulling you closer until you’re fully seated in his lap. You gasp in surprise, but don’t make an effort to push him away. On the contrary, you settle in his hold, sighing in relief.
Akaashi plays with the button at the front of your pants, easily spreading your legs so they dangle on the outside of his. “What did I say about fighting me, sweetie? I only want to help,” with deft hands, he undoes the clasp and pulls the zipper down. He’s so elated when you silently allow him to shimmy your bottoms off, leaving your panties exposed. “Doesn’t that feel so much better?”
He truly can’t help himself, thumb brushing against the front of your underwear. He slaps your thigh to placate you when you start squirming in his grasp. “I’m just helping, baby, it’s okay.”
“Noooo, sir, you can’t look at me down there,” the smell of wine is heavy on your breath as you slur your words. “It’s so embarrassing…” But Akaashi stopped listening when you called him “sir.” He thought he trained you not to call him that, but you can’t help it. So stupid with all that alcohol running through your veins. He’s feeling the effects of his few drinks—he would never be so forward like this but fortune favors the bold.
“Is that why there’s a wet spot right here?” Akaashi asks, touching between your legs once more, purposely reaching for the damp spot that’s slowly growing. He hears you whine again but quells it with a simple shush. “We have to be quiet remember? You’re gonna wake Kisa up.”
That makes you bite your lip, stifling any cries that would fall out. But it doesn’t do much to hinder Akaashi from touching you. His fingers playing at the hem of your panties. He could feel you trying to bring your legs together, but he keeps them spread. “Will you let me touch you, baby? I’ll make you feel so good,” he breathes.
Even in your embarrassment, you’re still a good girl and nod, boosting his ego. With the green light, Akaashi wastes no time plunging two of his fingers inside you. He’s quick to cover your mouth with his free hand, suppressing the cry before you can wake up the whole house. He even has to catch himself for a second, head lolling back at how wet you are. Fuck. 
The vice grip you have around his hand tells Akaashi that you’re going to feel so much sweeter when he has his cock in you. Perfect, he thinks. The thought of some inexperienced college boy on top of you, failing to make you cum, made him uneasy. A good girl like you needs a man. You’re still young and inexperienced—you need someone to show you real pleasure.
He’s more than happy to take up the mantle.
Akaashi’s other hand travels up your shirt, tugging at your bra until one of your breasts spills out. The flesh is so soft in his grasp, he has to let out another groan. He fucks you harder with his fingers, turning your head to swallow your cries with rough kisses. There’s a fire inside Akaashi that he didn’t know existed. It certainly wasn’t there during those last few months of his marriage or with those one-night stands he had to fill the void.
He needs you to cum, needs to feel your juices running down his arm. Akaashi pays attention to your clit, circling it with his thumb just enough to see your legs start shaking. “Does it feel good, angel?”
You cutely whine against his lips, “Yes…it feels so good, sir.” Akaashi has to compose himself when your hips start moving When you’re fucking yourself on his fingers, chasing your high any way you can. God, he’s really gonna fuck you up. “Ahh, sir—sir, I’m gonna!” You whine into your hand to cover up the sounds, creaming around Akaashi’s hand as your eyes rolled back in bliss. He lets your body rock through it, free hand playing with your buds. Rolling and tugging them between his fingers.
“Honey, you’re making a mess all over me,” but Akaashi’s the opposite of upset. He wants to lick all of it up until he’s drowning in your sweet nectar. He wants to bury his face in between your legs and make you cum over and over until your brain is mush. But he’s hard and leaking in his pants and while he knows he can hold out as long as he needs to, Akaashi needs to experience the feeling of your cunt around him.
While you’re still feeling the effects, Akaashi wraps his arms around you and hoists you up, carrying you bridal style. “You’re gonna feel so much more comfortable on my bed, baby,” he whispers, trekking up the steps, down the hallway, and far from Kisa’s room where she’s fast asleep. He sets you down on the plush king-sized mattress and smiles at how quickly you settle into the silk sheets. “Feels good, yeah? Wanted to have more room while I fuck you.” Akaashi breathes, unbuttoning his shirt before climbing into the bed and hovering over you.
You’re staring up at him with wide, doe eyes. So naive to what’s to come. “Oh, I’m gonna fuck you. Wanna see you cum from my cock, okay?”
Akaashi kisses you again, smothering your noises of affirmation. He pulls the rest of your clothes off, savoring the sight of your naked body, the swell of your breasts, and your glistening cunt between your legs. Next time, he thinks. Next time Akaashi will reward himself with fucking you with his tongue. His cock hits his abdomen when he finally frees it, kicking his pants and boxers down and stroking himself with anticipation. “It’s gonna go so deep in you, but I know you can take it. You’re such a good girl…”
The words only make you squirm more underneath him. Akaashi stops stalling and rubs his cock against your folds, cursing under his breath from how wet you are. It’s so easy for him to slip in, easily stretching you out until he’s buried at the hilt. He has you folded in a half, pushing at the back of your thighs to reach even deeper. 
Such a dumb, pretty girl you are, letting a man twice your age fuck you unprotected. You’re so lucky that it’s Akaashi doing this and not some other man who’d take advantage of you. He can take such good care of you—make you feel good, get your eyes to roll to the back of your head, you’ll never want to look at another man again.
“You’re so big,” you gasp, fingernails digging into Akaashi’s skin when he sets a slow pace. Akaashi pulls nearly all the way out before meeting his hips once again with yours. He can tell you’re getting addicted from the way your cunt spasms around him, clenching down to the point you’re practically choking him.
A pretty girl like you will definitely let him cum inside, fill up that young, fertile womb of yours. Oh, how adorable would you look with his seed spilling out of you? Or even better, plump and round with his baby? He’s always wanted a sibling for Kisa but his bitch wife wouldn’t allow it. But you wouldn’t fight him. Akaashi could be able to provide for you if you’d just let him.
“Fuck, you’re so perfect. Never felt a pussy this good in my life,” he mumbles, leaning down to kiss you, slightly changing the angle of his thrusts. The sounds of you crying out are intoxicating, he could drown in it. 
"You ever felt someone's cum inside you, baby?" Akaashi asks in between kisses, groaning at the sight of your breasts bouncing as he fucks you. 
"No, never..." you sigh, mouthing a small fuck as Akaashi keeps going. 
He kisses you harder and the pride that's been bubbling inside him burns white hot in the pit of his stomach. He might not be the first to claim your body, but he'll definitely be the first the breed you—and that feels so much better.
Akaashi brings a hand to your chin, forcing you to look at him. Your eyes were fucked out, mouth wet with spit. So beautiful. "It'll make you feel all warm," he says against your lips. "You'll feel so full and when it runs out of you—fuck. You'll love it so much, baby."
Wrapping your legs around Akaashi's waist, you pull him closer. "I want it! I want your cum, sir," you whined and Akaashi has you right where he wants. A dumb, cock drunk girl crying underneath him.
It's perfect. You're fucking perfect.
"God, I'm gonna fucking ruin you," he grunts, moving faster. Akaashi's thrusts get sloppy, losing his rhythm as he fucks you with purpose. "Gonna make you so full of me."
You're crying, fat tears running down your cheeks as you're overcome with pleasure and the feeling of your nails dragging down Akaashi's back tells him that you're cumming once again. 
It's so messy, your walls form a vice grip around his cock, and Akaashi, the experienced man that he is, can't help it. He cums with your name on his tongue, flooding your sinful cunt.
Both of you stay like that for a while. Akaashi's cock twitched inside you, making sure there isn't a single drop wasted. After a while, he wipes any stray tears that fall, kissing your warm cheeks with praises in between.
"You did so well, sweetie. You took all of me," he says, holding your shaking frame. He gives you a few seconds before peeling away and pulling his cock out, eyes locked on his seed flowing out of your cunt and making the mess he knew it would. "Look at that..." he whispers, completely mesmerized.
He knows he has to clean you up, but Akaashi lets himself enjoy the sight for right now. He'll keep the end of his bargain and drop you off at your place in the morning. But a part of him hopes you'll want to stay a little longer. You can be his cute live-in nanny, who takes care of his angel in the morning and gets fucked dumb at night. 
You’ll do it for him. You’re a good girl after all.
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©sugawarassoulmate 2022 all rights reserved - please do not repost/translate my work on other platforms!
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luvyeni · 20 days
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p. bsf!sohee x fem!reader | warnings: voyeurism (?), blowjob, allusions to sex | words: 0.8k ~ (854) 💂‍♂️ㆍ₊⊹
request: sohee smut pleaseeee 🫶🏻?
authors note. here you go lovey🩵
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
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living in the ages of various streaming services; you barely made it out to go the movies; opting to wait until it came on tv— avoiding spoilers on tiktok so you could peacefully watch it the comforts of your own home; you just really didn’t enjoy the inside movie theater— so imagine your surprise when your best friends basically kidnaped you to drag you to a random drive in movie theater.
“sohee are you serious?” you scoffed as you pulled into the almost empty theater, the other three cars probably containing couples who want to fuck or teens needing a place to get high— or both. “what?” he smiled. “i thought it would be fun.”
the teenager who probably wanted a job but didn’t want to do any work sat scrolling on his phone. “this place is like 100 years old, and i doubt that popcorn is any good.” you pointed. “don’t worry I got us covered.” he pointed to the back seat, a bag full of snacks and drinks. “just gotta tune the radio so we can hear the movie.” he said. “cheer up, it will be fun.”
you decided to give it a try and not be so pessimistic— grabbing a blanket to cover yourself, grabbing some chips and a beer. “you know, most people don’t come to these things.” sohee said; munching on some chips. “yeah.” you laugh. “as you can see these three cars here besides ours and that car has been rocking for the past 20 minutes and there’s smoke coming out that one.” you pointed it out. “and i think that one is abandoned.”
he look around pouting; he really wanted to try something new with you. “don’t be too upset, you know i don’t like these types of things, but this isn’t all that bad so i give you props.” you reached over, pinching his cheek. “good job.” he smiled, stuffing his face some more with his favorite trip.
a few more minutes past of watching the movie when you heard a loud moan. “oh my god.” you let out a snort. “told you.” you turned to your friend, who’s neck was now red. “aw is our little sohee getting excited hearing the couples have sex.” he scratched the back of his neck. “sh-shut up.” You laughed. “you are!” you exclaimed, he whined covering his face. “is that why you invited me out here to live out you voyeur fantasies, pervert.”
sohee felt himself chub up in his pants, your words along with the moaning was doing unimaginable things to him. “it is hot, isn’t it?” you said. “he seems to really be giving it to her.” you smirked, seeing his hand come up to cover his hard on. “y-yn.” you placed your hand on his knee. “please don’t.”
“you don’t want me to touch you?” you tilted your head teasingly. “the movie still has 30 minutes left, are you gonna sit there palming your cock to the couple fucking next to us or are you gonna let me suck you off?” he moved his hand, heavily breathing; he couldn’t believe his best friend was about to suck him off. “lift your hips up.”
he lifted his hips, letting you pull out his cock, his tip dark red, dripping with pre-cum. “shit, hearing them fuck made you this hard, you really are a little perv aren’t you?” he let out a loud whimper as your hand wrapping around his length. “its kind of pathetic.” You squeezed his cock. “oh fuck! please don’t do that.” he moaned out.
“why?” you pouted, leaning over;;kissing his tip. “you gonna cum just from me squeezing your cock.” you squeezed it again, gripped the arm of the chair. “really pathetic hee.”
you finally put the boy out his misery, putting his cock into your mouth. “fu-fuck.” he moaned. “yo-your mouth is.” he gasped, unable to speak barely as you bobbed your head, jerking off what you couldn’t speak. “oh fuck your so good.” his head was thrown back, his hand coming to your head softly, caressing it. “sh-shit.”
it was messy, the noises from your mouth as you gagged on his cock will fuel him with jerk off material for mouth. “fuck yn im gonna cum, please get of.” you pulled off of him, looking at him in the eyes, stroking his cock. “come on hee, look at me.” you purred, the boy forced himself to look at you. “good boy.”
“come on cum for me, want you to cum in my mouth.” you put your mouth on his tip, sucking as you stroked the rest of his cock. “shit im cumming.” His hand slapped against the window. “ngh fuck!” he shouted, his cum spurting from his cock, hitting your tongue. “shit.”
you let him finish, pull off of him, swallowing his sticky substance. “yo-you didn’t have to.” but you weren’t listening, taking off your shirt, climbing into his lap, feeling his cock twitch against your clothed cunt. “just pay me back.” you kissed him. “h-how.”
“theres still 20 minutes left, let’s see how many times your cock can make me cum.”
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©️LUVYENI
253 notes · View notes
cowgurrrl · 2 months
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Sleeping on the Blacktop
Pairing: Joel Miller x fem!reader
Author's note: guys we did it i wrote smut i actually like (ps this was edited but also not reread because I’ve been trying to write it for five hours so if you see any mistakes no you didn’t)
Summary: The Land of No Return [4.7k]
Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR MEDIA CONSUMPTION, platonic expressions of love, the mortifying ordeal of being known, sexting, we finally get to know about reader's secret tattoos, smut, Joel the Menace makes his long awaited return with that dirty fucking mouth, mutual masturbation, phone sex (??(sure)), protected sex (no Miller babies for them) p in v stuff, June being indulgent with describing Joel Miller, anxiety, I think that's it??
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Music floods the kitchen as you and Andie work on making the best "last supper but with women" possible. The lamps glow orange on the walls and create funny shadows when you dance together, pulling each other in and out to old jazzy tunes. You laugh when she throws a string of spaghetti at your fridge to test if it's ready a little too hard, and it splatters water everywhere. You, honestly, might be a little delirious. You're both in your pajamas, and you've been watching movies all day. You exchange what you remember from New Year's Eve and cringe at what the other fills in. You drink cheap wine from plastic cups and snack on chips as the food cooks. 
It feels like high school again, with all the girlish giggling and inside jokes you trade back and forth, except this time, instead of her going back to her house ten minutes up the road, she's going back to her apartment half the world away. No matter how long you get with her, it's never enough. Thousands of miles and different schedules will do that. Keeping long-distance friendships as an adult is just as hard, if not harder, than making new ones. 
When dinner is ready, you fix your plates and sit next to each other at your messy dining room table— the IKEA one she helped you build when Henry walked out with the first one— and eat. Paint stains the wood of the table, and half-finished works are scattered around the dining room, but you barely notice them as you talk. She tells you about the things waiting for her in Vienna: work, her cat, Oslo, and piano lessons. You don't have to pretend to be envious because you are. You have to go back to school and the Real World once you drop her off at the airport in the morning. You wish you could go with her. 
"Alright, c'mon. Spill it. What's going on with you and Joel?" She asks in between bites of garlic bread. You laugh and shake your head.
"There's nothing to tell."
"Bullshit. Tommy told me he saw you guys."
"Speaking of Tommy," you pivot. "What's going on there? You two seemed pretty chummy." You raise your eyebrows at her, and a big smile takes over her face. She takes another bite of food to buy herself some time, but there's no way you're letting her off the hook, especially after all her teasing about Joel.
"Nothing. We were just… talking." She finally says, and you give her a look. 
"Talking?"
"Yes. People talk. You should try it sometime."
"Was it talking like we are now or talking like Joel and I talked?" You hum, and she kicks her feet as she leans forward.
"So you and Joel did talk." 
"Well, we probably would've if somebody didn't come barging in."
"Goddammit, I told him to wait," she groans. "Sorry, girl."
"Yeah, me too," you say, and she laughs. You bump her knee and give her a look. "Alright, your turn. What's going on with Tommy?" 
"Nothing that could actually turn into anything." 
"Aw, c'mon. Don't count yourself out so early."
"It's not counting myself out. It's being realistic. I live in Vienna. He lives here. I'm not ready to come back to the States, and he seems content, so there's nothing that can happen," she shrugs. "It was a fling. A very nice fling, but a fling nevertheless." She seems a little too sad for it to have been just a fling. They exchanged numbers, and you've caught her texting him several times. She said she did kiss him on New Year's Eve (before she threw up), but they didn't go any further besides flirting the next morning. You watched them test each other at breakfast, and he seemed just as interested in her as she was in him. They'd be cute together. She sighs and pushes her pasta around in her bowl like a dejected character from a period piece.
"Tommy is very handsome." You comment, and she grabs your arm, animating all of a sudden. 
"Dude, I've been dying to talk about it. What the fuck are they putting in the water here? It's insane." 
"It's annoying, right?" 
"So annoying." She agrees. You laugh about it together and, finally, give her the details she's been waiting so patiently for. When you finish your story, her hands are over her mouth, and her eyes are wide. "Oh, my God. You have to get him back."
"I know, I know! He's driving me up a fucking wall." You say, taking a bite of food. It will get cold if you don't stop talking, but you also don't care. 
"You could surprise him with some lingerie or something." She suggests, and you groan. 
"God, I don't even remember the last time I bought lingerie."
"All the more reason to buy some." 
"I don't know. I feel like I could just show up naked, and he'd be happy with that."
"He sounds like a keeper then."
"Yeah, I don't know," you shrug. "I like him a lot. I just… don't know if it's sustainable."
"Why?" She asks. You almost want to gesture around your messy apartment and half-put together life as if it will answer her question.
"I mean, he's a good guy, and we're having fun, but for how long? His kid's gonna be in at least one of my classes until she graduates. Not to mention, he has another daughter who is in medical school. We both work full-time. And then there's the whole having to keep it a secret thing. It could get really old really fast." You sigh. 
"What if it doesn't?"
"What?"
"What if it doesn't get old? What if it ends up working out?" She asks. You take a deep breath. "You didn't even think about that possibility. Did you?"
"I just don't wanna get hurt."
"That's a very real possibility. Things could go wrong. He could break your heart. You could lose your job. Society as we know it could come crashing down, and you know what? The sun's still gonna come up the next day. The birds will still sing, and I will still be here," she says, putting her hand over yours. You purse your lips as you process her words. "You deserve nice things, kid. Don't count yourself out so early." She echoes your earlier sentiment, and you smile.
She's right. Of course, she's right. You don't let yourself think good things could happen because you're so focused on all the bad. She's known you for so long she can read your thoughts and know your habits before you can. What a horrifying and beautiful thing it is to be known inside and out like that. 
"Maybe you should've been a writer instead of a musician," you say, and she laughs. You squeeze her hand and sigh as you look at her. "I'm really gonna miss you."
"I'm really gonna miss you, too."
"I wish you could stay."
"I know," she says. "But you need an excuse to come to Vienna, and I need an excuse to come to Austin, and if I stay, we lose that."
"I guess that's true."
"Besides, if I stop making trans-Atlantic calls, I think my phone company would be concerned." She points out, making you laugh. You know she's telling you what she's told herself this whole time. She loves Vienna, but you know she gets homesick. You know she's trying really hard to convince herself to get back on that plane. You don't push her about staying again. You just indulge in her presence. 
"I love you." You say softly, and she smiles.
"I love you, too." She says. 
It means so much more than just "I love you." It means, "I love you, and I want us both to eat well." It means, "I love you, and I can't imagine doing this life without you." It means, "I love you, and I know you have to go." Never any buts. Always ands, because love like this knows no bounds. Not borders, not time zones, not lifestyles. 
You finish the dinner you made and clean the kitchen side by side before climbing into bed and staying up as late as possible to try and get Andie back on Vienna time. In the morning, you drag yourselves out of bed and sing in the car on the way to get coffee, and when the time comes for you to get her suitcase out of your backseat and watch her disappear behind glass doors, you hug her tight and tell her you love her again. She repeats the sentiment with another squeeze and deep breath that tells you how close to tears she is. Then, she turns around and doesn't look back to prove she's strong enough to leave. She doesn't need to prove anything to you. You always knew she was strong enough to do this.
The car ride back is emotional and lonely and tinged with the bass line of Ribs by Lorde, but your phone buzzes as you pull back into your apartment complex with tears staining your cheeks. 
Thanks for letting us meet Andie. She's a really sweet person. I'm sorry she has to leave today.
You don't remember telling him what day she was leaving, but she might've told Tommy, and Tommy told Joel. You smile and text him back. 
Thanks for taking care of us. She only had good things to say about you and Tommy. We'll have to all hang out again the next time she's home. 
And then.
Thanks for checking on me. I really appreciate it. 
Of course. I'm always a wreck when I have to drop Sarah off at the airport. I'm around if you wanna talk. Ellie's hanging out with some friends, and Tommy's on-site today.
You stare at the messages and debate your options. He basically just told you he's home alone and has nothing to do for the rest of the day. And yes, he is probably being sweet and really offering to talk if you're feeling lonely, but you also know how talking usually goes for you two. You smirk as you type out a message.
Just talk?
It seems like he can't type fast enough.
What else would you wanna do?
I think you made some promises you need to follow through on, Miller.
I guess I did. 
Come over and I can do just that.
Actually, I have some work to get done :( maybe next time?
You lock your phone and bound up to your apartment, conscious of the sudden lengthening of time between messages. It's fun to imagine him trying to come up with a response that respects your boundaries but also lets you know how needy he is. He may have started this little game, but you're gonna be the one to perfect it. Thus begins the days upon days of not sexting, but not not sexting. 
At first, it's just messages about how you miss him and wish he was around. He tries to find an excuse to come over, but you effectively cockblock him at every turn. Your response times get a little slower the more worked up he gets, so he has to figure it out on his own. You never would've thought Joel Miller, a man with gray in his beard and wrinkles lining his face, could be such a fast texter, but you figure there's nothing more desperate than a horny man. 
Messages quickly escalate to pictures. They start off innocent enough: a picture of the painting you're working on, but your bare legs give away the fact that you're not wearing pants, a picture of him stepping out of a hot shower, his bare chest slightly red and glistening from the water, a picture of you wearing the burnt orange shirt he sent you home in New Year's Day with no bra on underneath. Then, you get a little bolder. After a quick trip to the mall, you pose in front of the mirror in a short delicate white night down with pretty lace details on the top, the hem barely hitting the tops of your thighs and showing off the large tattoos hiding there. You look hot, and imagining Joel's reaction to you makes you flush and rub your thighs together to get some relief.
It's true that Joel would've been happy if you showed up to his house wearing (or not wearing) anything, but when the photo pings to his phone, he's never been more grateful for Victoria's Secret in his life. His breath hitches in his throat, and he quickly tucks his phone into his chest like someone is gonna come up behind him and see what he's looking at. He's barely glanced at the photo and he's already straining in his jeans. 
Goddamn, he texts back. You're so fucking pretty, baby.
You like it?
It's a dumb question, but you really don't care.
It's perfect.
What do you like about it?
Besides the fact that you're the one wearing it? I like that it makes you look like more of an angel than you already are, and I like that I can finally see those tattoos you've been hiding from me. 
Bingo, you think to yourself. He was able to catch glimpses of the large pieces hiding on your back and shoulders at the art gallery, and when he picked up on New Year's Eve, you caught him staring at them each time. You thought he was following the inky lines up your body, but you couldn't be sure. Now, he's giving himself away, and you're practically buzzing with excitement.
You turn around in the mirror and arch your back, perfectly showing off your ass and the intricate tattoo lining your spine, and snap a picture. It's one of the largest ones you have, and it's also the easiest to hide. Besides, you definitely didn't get it for your own enjoyment. You live for moments like this. You send him the picture and smile as you type.
Like this one?
Your phone rings not even two minutes after he reads the message. You giggle when he groans into the receiver instead of greeting you.
"You're gonna fuckin' kill me, baby." He says, his voice so deep you can practically feel it rumble against your ear.
"I told you I'd get you back." You say it like it's obvious, but he just hums. There's shuffling on his end, and all you can do is wait for him to say something else.
"What else have you been hidin' underneath all those little dresses, hm?" He asks. "Tattoos. The most fuckin' perfect tits I've ever seen. Anythin' else I should know bout? 'S your pussy as pretty as the rest of ya?" You didn't mean for him to hear you gasp, but he seemed pleased that he could pull such a sound from you without even being in the same room. Just like that, any doubt or reservation you had left flies out the window. You finally cave and slip your hand down your panties to glide your fingers through your folds. "Am I makin' you wet, sweetheart?"
"Fuck," you mumble. It's absurd how turned on you are by this whole thing. Your fingers slowly circle your clit, and your head gets so fuzzy you almost forget to respond to him. "Yes, Joel." 
"Are you playin' with yourself?" He asks, and you nod even though he can't see you. "Poor thing. I wish I could be there to help ya. I'd have you spread open for me so I can touch you however I want. Figure out what you like and what makes you cry for me." You put him on speaker and throw your phone down so you can focus on gliding through your wetness, your middle finger pushing into you slowly.
"What... what would you do?" You ask, breathless. 
"I'd start by usin' my fingers just to feel you out, and I bet you'd feel so fuckin' good. I'd play with your clit until you're beggin' me to put a finger inside you, and I'd slip two in slowly while kissin' your inner thighs and watchin' you squeeze my fingers," you moan as you listen to his raspy voice and fuck yourself to his words. You try to imagine what his fingers would feel like inside of you. How different compared to yours, how much better they'd feel. Goddammit. "Then, I'd use my mouth on you while my fingers move in and out. I'd lick you all over and feel you soakin' me when I suck on your clit." He says, and you return to rubbing said bundle of nerves, faster this time, as you become acutely aware of his labored breathing over the phone. 
Is he touching himself? The idea of him holding the phone with one hand and fisting his cock with the other sends a wave of heat down your spine, and you keen into your own hand. A shaky breath and muttered curse leave his lips, and then you know for sure what he's doing. Your head spins, and you'd be embarrassed by how close you are just from his voice if you weren't entirely focused on the pleasure clouding your brain. 
"Fuck, Joel-"
"I know, baby, I know," he coos sympathetically. Another lewd moan leaves you as you get closer and closer to the edge, stars threatening the corners of your vision. "Are you gonna come for me like this?" He asks, and you hum in the affirmative, not trusting yourself to form words. "Come on. Let me hear you. I wanna hear what you sound like when you fall apart." His voice is coming faster and breathier, a light growl at the end of his words. How are you to deny him that? 
The speed of your fingers on your clit increases, but it's his own broken whimpers that finally do it. Your back arches as the waves wash over you, and noises you didn't even know you could make escape your lips. You can vaguely hear a broken sigh accentuated by a particularly hot whine from Joel's end. Henry was never as vocal or talkative as Joel is. None of your past partners have been. In the aftershocks of your orgasm, you have a quick passing thought that he might ruin dating for you. You might never want to see anyone else who doesn't treat you like this. You might be fucked.
"Joel," you say when you have control over your thoughts again. He takes a deep breath and clears his throat.
"Yeah?"
"Get the fuck over here now."
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Joel's house is on the other side of Austin. With traffic, getting to your apartment can take anywhere from twenty to forty-five minutes, depending on how fast you're willing to go and how many red lights you can pass under. Joel gets there in fifteen. You're still in the flouncy dress you bought specifically to torture him, but by the time you open the door for him, you're much less interested in making his life any more miserable than you already have over the past week. 
He doesn't hesitate to charge into your apartment, grab your face, and kiss you like his life depends on it. His tongue sweeps over your bottom lip, and you open to him, clinging to him as his hands move from your face to the backs of your thighs to pick you up. You squeal in surprise and lock your legs around his waist to bring him closer and keep yourself from falling. Even though he obviously came over the phone at the same time you did, he's hard again and pressing against your bare pussy. He hisses when you grind against him, and his jaw clenches as he pulls away like he's in pain.
"Where's your bedroom?" He asks, wide eyes searching the hallway behind you.
"First door on the left." You say as you duck your head to kiss his neck. He sighs and indulges in the feeling of your tongue against his skin before he finally finds his feet and stumbles into your bedroom. You're halfway through marking him before he lays you down and immediately rucks his hands up your thighs, spreading them apart and making you whine. 
"You okay?" He asks, stopping all movement to scan over your face for any signs of discomfort. You nod and reach for the buttons of his jeans.
"Yes. Just need you." You say. 
"Are you sure?" 
"Joel, I just came from the sound of your voice. Yes, I'm fucking sure." You say, a little frenzied as you pull at the hem of his shirt. He laughs as he pulls it over his head and quickly unzips his jeans. 
"Feisty." 
"Can you blame me?" You ask, and he shakes his head. He tugs his jeans and his briefs down at the same time and unveils all of him to you in one go. He's beautiful. You knew he would be, but seeing the graying chest hairs and the pretty happy trail leading down to his hard cock in between his strong, tan thighs is an entirely different thing. You reach for him, desperate to feel the weight of him in your hands, but he stops you by slipping the tiny straps of your night gown down your arms. 
He carefully pulls the fabric down your body until it's pooled next to his clothes on the floor. His eyes fall to the black lines wrapping around your shoulders, and he draws his eyes to your collarbones and sternum, his breathing stuttering at the sight of you laid out under him. 
"So much prettier than I imagined." He murmurs as he ducks his head to kiss the valley between your breasts. You smile and run your hands through his curls as he mouths at your chest, leaving red marks in his wake and making you press him closer.
"How many times have you thought about this?" You ask. Has he always wanted you in the way you've wanted him? You're almost positive he has. There's no other way to explain the reverence with which he's looking at you. He's so wrapped up in you it's almost suffocating. Every time you glance at his face, he's staring at you with soft eyes and blown pupils. 
"Lost count." There it is. The confirmation. You grab at his ribs to bring him closer, pulling him over you to kiss him slow and deep. Despite the heat of him against you and the ache between your thighs, you both take the time to savor it. That is until his overthinking takes over. "I didn't bring a condom. Fuck, I was in a rush. I didn't think." He says quickly, like he's waiting for you to back out or push him away. You bring your thumb up to the worried wrinkle between his eyebrows and smooth it away, kissing his jaw.
"You think I would get you all worked up to not be prepared? C'mon, baby," you turn the nickname around on him, and he leans into your hand like a cat. "Top drawer." You say. He scrambles to your bedside table and grabs the first one he can find as you move onto all fours while he's distracted. You listen for the foil ripping and the subtle sound of the latex fitting over him. You can't stop the smirk from forming when he looks up and sees the sight in front of him.
"Fuckin' Hell," he mutters. Your back is arched perfectly, your hair gathered over your shoulder, and the tattoo you got done so many years ago is on display for him. "You are so goddamn perfect." He says as he presses his chest into your back and kisses your shoulder. He plants a few more kisses across your neck and back, making you wait longer than you already have, and just when you think you're going crazy, he slowly pushes into you and punches all the air from your lungs. 
He's big. Bigger than anyone you've been with before, and he seems to know that. He rolls his hips, and you moan, gripping at the sheets under you for stability as you adjust. His breathing is ragged behind you, and he groans when you involuntarily clench around him. "You okay?" He asks, his voice straining. His patience and self-control should be fucking studied. 
"Yeah, I'm okay." You assure him, and he nods. He starts to move slowly at first, but when you start whining and shaking under him, he snaps. You're both impatient. Months of following the rules and caring about what other people could think or say tumble out of your heads as he sets a rough pace. You've been dreaming about this and pushing it away since he walked into your classroom that day, and now that it's happening, you can't hide how desperate you are for him. You cry his name as he fucks into you deeply, no part of your bodies not touching, but it's still not close enough.
"You're so fuckin' good for me, baby. Jesus fuck," he moans into your ear, his uneven breaths echoing into your skull. "You feel so good." 
He sits back and brings you with him, changing the angle and forcing him deeper inside of you as his hand snakes around your waist and dips to play with your clit. You curse loudly and dig your nails into his forearm as bright pleasure courses through your veins. "'M gonna come if you keep doing that," you warn, your voice high and strained as he adds a little more pressure. 
"C'mon, honey, come on my cock for me. Please, I want it." It could be the slight whine in his voice or the fact that he's begging you for it, or the fact that the tight circles he's rubbing into your clit are making you see stars, but you come hard. You rely on him to hold you upright as he fucks you through your high, the slick between your thighs growing as his own orgasm washes over him, and he moans directly in your ear, an unexpected but not unpleasant gift. You think you could get off again just to the sounds he makes when he's coming. 
You stay like that for a second, wrapped up in each other and breathing hard with him still inside you, before he finally finds the courage to slip out of you with only a tiny pained moan. He carefully guides you onto your back, your bones jelly, and kisses your cheek before he pads off to the bathroom to throw away the used condom. 
It's quiet again in the apartment, but it's not lonely anymore. He makes himself at home in your space, asking if he can get water and snacks from your kitchen and walking around naked as the day he was born. "I wanna make sure you've got enough energy for round two." He says, making you laugh.
"Are you finally gonna make good on your promise to take your time with me?" 
"Fuck yeah." He says, coming back to kiss your lips one more time before walking to the kitchen. It's like if he goes a few minutes without tasting you, he can't function, or at least, that's what he makes it seem like. You're more than receptive to the attention and can only watch as he walks around. Your trust in your legs is not strong enough to get up just yet. 
In the domestic silence, it would be easy for your mind to run rampant with rogue thoughts and anxieties, but when Joel returns to the bedroom with snacks, bottles of water, and those stupidly sweet eyes, they get pushed to the back burner. He gets under the covers and pulls you into him, his warm body grounding you to this moment and not letting your thoughts stray. He presses kisses to your hair and your face every so often as you talk about everything and nothing. 
Somehow, it feels natural, like you've been doing this the whole time or like everything was leading up to this. Maybe it was. Still, you'll need to talk about this. You know you will.
Just... not yet.
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wonusdoll · 9 months
Text
FLOWERS • PJS
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Synopsis: Jisungs a hopeless romantic and gets jealous easily
Content: fluff! cavity inducing fluff so fluffy i wanna cry
pairing: Childhood Bestfriend!Jisung x reader
notes+ WHY DOES NOBODY WRITE FOR JISUNGGGG i had to take matters into my own hands so here you go :D this was originally gonna contain smut but i couldnt help myself with the fluff anyways, enjoy!!
You and Jisung weren't always friends. When your mom introduced her best friends second grader son, 4th grade you didn't mind. Until he started playing with your stuff, jumping on your bed, stealing your snacks, and blaming you on things he did and getting you in trouble.
Naturally, you started resenting him, dreading when he would come over, and chose to ignore him at school, finding it embarrassing whenever he would go over to you and your friends at the playground and ask to play with them. your friends found him cute, but you, you hated him.
Going into your middle school years, he slowly got more tolerable. He started understanding boundaries but still was the same annoying little kid.
In some point of time, Jisung turned from an annoying little kid who yelled and cried all the time to one of your closest friends. And then when he finally started high school, you guys started hanging out willingly, without his mom forcing him to go over.
Some days you would catch him in your living room watching tv with your dog, or accidentally walking in on him showering in your bathroom, or in your kitchen making ramen. Sometimes he would bring his friends over to your house. You honestly didn't mind that much as long as they never broke anything, or disturbed her in any way, which jisung made sure never happened.
"Jisung?? That you??" You yelled from the top of the stairs after hearing feet shuffling and the front door opening and closing. The two of you made plans to watch horror movies and have a sleepover to celebrate the new season of autumn.
"Nope!" Jisung yelled back, making you go downstairs with a grin. But you immediately furrowed your brows and bit your inner cheek, upon seeing 6 other people. you knew them, jisung would bring them around sometimes but you didn’t know them.
"Jisung, whats going on?"
He grinned annoyingly cutely back and held up some convenience store bags up and nodded towards his friends, "They wanted to hang out but my mom banned us from the house after last time.”
You scoff and look at him like he was crazy, "What- are you kidding me?" You say just above a whisper, flickering your eyes between him and the guys behind him, "I thought we were gonna hang out?? You didn't even ask if it was okay to bring them over? if you wanted to hang out with them instead you should've just told me."
With a smirk, jisung was much closer than you remember him being, he tucked a few stray strands of your hand back, "I'm sorry princess i should have asked, hm? If we're too much of a bother we'll quiet down okay?" He pulled away and looked into your eyes, pleading and begging for uou to say yes.
You mask your flustered state with a sigh and wiping your face with your hand as if annoyed.
"Fine, whatever, just— leave me alone im gonna go study" you warn making him grin and ruffle your hair, juxtaposing his previous act. He's called you princess numerous times before, even when you guys were kids but in that tone, that voice, and devilish smile, it felt different.
You wanted to tell him off for joking around with you like that, making you feel that way. It was something you always felt around him but maybe it was his perfectly messy hair, his oversized hoodie making him look so comfy, his soft plump lips, or his hand in your hair, or the name he called you, but the feeling became overwhelmingly strong, like when a candles been burning for hours and slowly the fire grows bigger and it fills the whole room with its pleasant fumes.
You hung around with them for a bit when you took a break from studying because you couldn't focus. but the reason you couldnt focus was sitting right across from you on the couch, sending lingering glances everybody noticed.
When he catches your gaze you turn away with a light blush but when you catch his, he doesnt shy away, keeping eye contact with you with a look in his eye that you couldnt read for the first time.
In the time you got to formally meet his best friends, you surprisingly got along with all of them. Huang Renjun was the one who stuck out the most out of the 7, other than Jisung who kept eyes on you the whole time.
You got to have a one on one conversation with Renjun about each others favorite music artists, which were quite similar, and art itself. You were already interested in art but with the knowledge and story telling Renjun excitedly provided made you want to learn more. So you guys planned a hang out the next day to an art museum Renjun was fond and familiar with. 
You posted the day out with him on your story with Art Deco - Lana Del Rey in the background.
Jisung always made sure to heart and reply to your story even if it was as simple as an ootd, but this time he didn't. You furrowed your brows and looked at the views and there he was, also active. You tried texting him regularly but you were left on delivered until 7 hours later but all you got was a
"sorry lol"
It hurt your feelings, you couldn't lie. So you texted him again not even 5 seconds later.
"too busy being active to answer? lmfao"
He leaves it on read for a few minutes before replying
"too busy hanging out with renjun? yk we all made plans tgt”
You scoff at his attitude
"whats your problem?? it was HIS choice to hang out with ME. not like you wanted to."
"chill out i just wanted them to meet you, didn't know you were gonna be all over them tho"
"fuck you."
You threw your phone at the end of the bed and hug your pillow against your chest as tears welled up in your eyes. You didn't know why you were so affected by his words, usually you wouldn't even press him so much about not answering, and would just leave him alone but seeing him be so uninterested left a mark on you.
A few nights later you were watching a scary movie in the darkness of your living room when you heard knocks on your front door. you paused the movie to make sure it wasn't from the tv, and when they come again, you look at the time.
"Who's here at 11:30 at night" You whisper to yourself and cautiously approach the door.
Thunder suddenly struck making you whimper and jump back, but you decide to just rip the bandaid off, after all horror movies aren't real right?
"Jisung?!" You exclaim, seeing him standing there out in the pouring rain with his head down ashamed.
"Hey.."
You quickly let him in, taking his soaked coat off and telling him to wait while you get a towel.
He was silent while you scolded him for being out in the rain so late without so much as an umbrella.
He finally brung his hands from behind his back, revealing your favorite flowers in an articulated assorted bouquet wrapped in paper.
"Sorry if they're kind of ruined.. I ran all the way here" He sniffles and scratched his nape awkwardly.
You bite your lip remembering your last interaction, "You wanna tell me why?"
"I'm sorry y/n im so sorry im such a fucking loser and a coward for getting mad at you  I never wanted to hurt you i just was so angry that you hung out with Renjun that i took it out on you without thinking and ive been trying to figure out how to apologize to you so i went to the flower shop like 10 times in the past 2 days because i wanted to get you flowers but you have 5 different favorite flowers so i got 5 different bouquets for you then realized that was too much so i just got one with 2 of your favorites but felt bad that i left out the other 3 so i got another one with all of them but they didn't look good so i spent the whole day learning how to make a bouquet to make it perfect for you then realized it was already night and thundering and you hate thunder so i ran all the way here and now they look horrible and ugly and-"
"JISUNG." You put a stop to his rant with a chuckle and put your hands on his pink dusted cheeks. He pants out and looks in your eyes to find any anger or disgust in them but you were smiling, "Hey its okay, i promise its okay," You take the flowers from his hands and bring them up to your face to smell them, "they're beautiful ji, seriously."
He takes another pan over your face to scan your expression to really make sure you weren't mad and one he realized that, he lets out the breath he was holding and chuckles, then laughs a bit harder.
You laugh along with him then card your fingers through his wet hair, "Did you really learn how to make a bouquet of flowers for me? And run all the way here in the rain?" You ask, softly now.
He smiles and takes your hand away to hold it instead, "Yeah.. you know i would swim across the whole ocean just to get these to you. Also whats wrong with learning a new skill, i always wanted to learn how to.. make assorted flowers.." He dryly chuckles at the end.
you could hear your heart thumping out of your chest when you feel the pressure of his eyes staring into your own, as if trying to answer a question he hasn't asked. so you ask your own.
"Jisung," You start making him nod, "Why were you so upset?" You ask, making you swallow thickly.
and suddenly you're hyper aware of everything going on, your breathing, your blinking, the rain and thunder, his facial expressions, his thumb caressing your hand.
Jisung doesnt answer for a second, trying to find the right words. His mouth was drying up, he opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out so he gulped.
He was now holding your hand with both of his hands, "I love you." he blurted, "I love you and Im selfish and only want you to myself, I just wanted to treasure you for my myself and not let other people see how amazing and perfect you are because i was scared you'd fall for them and forget about me so when i saw you were with renjun and saw how excited you were to talk to him and hang out with him i felt.. rejected? in a way? like he had something i didn't to make you feel that way. So i was sad and upset and jealous— god, i was so unbelievably jealous, and i know im not allowed to because we're only best friends and you're allowed to be friends and talk to anybody you want to but i just- i just didn't want you to notice anyone else, and leave me.."
He ended his rant with a sigh and closed his eyes shut, mentally preparing for you to laugh in his face and friend-zone him, but it never came.
When he opened his eyes you were just standing there, not saying anything, with a smile on your face.
You giggled as he looked at you with an expectant look.
“Okay.”
His brows furrowed and his hand started slipping from yours “That- thats it? Just okay? You couldn’t have let me down any better-“
“Okay, I wont leave you.”
His expression softened, watching as you laughed and hugged him tightly, burying your face in his chest, “Jisung park, I will never leave you and you can never leave me, if you do i’ll have to kill you.” You tried to threaten him but he just found you adorable, and picked you up in his arms.
You guys laughter filled the room, bouncing around the rooms, sounding almost louder than the rain and thunder.
Suddenly, your enemy turned into your bestfriend who turned into your lover. And you couldn’t have it any other way.
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thatonewatching · 10 months
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John Doe headcanons
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⬆️ That fella up there
(Canon: Bisexual, Fluid-Nonbinary, 20-40, 'Regular Guy' is his species, always messy hair, hair can move on its own, pupils expand when excited, tongue is a cute heart shape, too many teeth, his teeth aren't dirty, just naturally yellow, scars aren't because he's 'sad', doesn't know how to wear his jacket right, 112 pounds, 4 fingers on each hand, three toes on each foot, 5'8, tongue is very long, naturally black nails, shirt changes every time you look at him, has eyelids and chooses when he blinks, body has a clay-like texture, he doesn't have any organs but can for them if he or you chooses, and he has a hard time closing his, mouth fully.) All of that is canon, and I'm referencing the canon ref sheet from the actual creator of the game. You can find it on the John Doe Wiki. <3
He can't seem to get the hang of technology. No matter how many times you explain what to press and click and download, he didn't seem to be interested. Not until he found out that he could contact you through it, that is.
He immediately tried to understand it after finding out he could talk to you while you were away, instead of following you to work. That's not going to stop anytime soon, though. He just can't handle you being away!
Purrs, kind of. Like if he's happy or something, or just feels positive in general. Curls up when he sleeps, always in the fetal position when he sleeps, as weird and uncomfortable as it may seem.
He likes animals but won't get any because he feelsit'll take some attention off of him, and we can't have that, can we? No. Prefers animals like rats and snakes because they fascinate him. Doesn't understand their 'workings' as he says.
Doesn't need to blink. He doesn't have the need to wet his eyes, considering that they're for show. Sleeping, as well. Doesn't feel the need to sleep, but he learned how, in his own way. It's not sleeping, exactly. It's more of a state of tranquility and peace. The first time you fell asleep, he thought you died, never having seen a being sleep. He understands now, though, so it's all right.
His hair is very weird. Sometimes it's soft, fluffy, and sometimes stiff and matted. He sheds a lot. It doesn't matter what he's done or is doing, his hair gets everywhere. He's not allowed near the food when you're cooking, because you don't want hair for dinner. He says it adds flavor, seeing it as a way to be closer to one another.
Likes piercings. He enjoys the thought of having needles go through his skin to add element to his body, but not vice versa. Refuses to think about you getting hurt, even if you assure him it's fine. Will not allow anyone, including yourself, to hurt you.
Likes fire. It makes his clay-like skin hardened, rather than how doughy it usually feels. Unlike fire, he hates water. Makes him all gooey and slimy, and he doesn't like that. Wants to feel solid-it's better for hugs.
Speaking of hugs, he is practically attached at the hip. Always has some part of him on you and vice versa. Whether it be holding hands, a finger through your belt loop, or just a hand in your back pocket, he's content. If physical touch isn't your thing, then he'll tell you how much he adores you. You don't like words of affirmation? No problem! He'll do anything you need him to! Feel bad for him doing so much? Spend some time together! Whether it be watching a movie, cuddling, cooking (even though he sheds and doesn't know how to cook in the slightest), or even just being around each other, doing your own things. Need your space? Don't have to tell him twice! He'll get you some gifts. You said you wanted something three years ago? Done. Any physical item or thing he can provide to you will be provided. Long story short, he'll do whatever you want.
Wears a lot of different types of clothes. Skirts, pants, crop tops, shorts, whatever. One thing he doesn't love is jeans. He'll wear them, but he prefers sweats or skirts. Can't deal with the feeling of scratchy clothes. Will literally chew them up and throw them away. Speaking of clothes, he steals yours. Especially if they're dirty or need to be washed. Wears them until you take them for the wash. Gets sad when you take them.
His voice cracks occasionally, and he gets so upset about it. Will take a deep 'breath', or the closest thing he does to breathing, and says the sentence again. He doesn't like when it happens and stops talking until you force him if it happens a lot that day.
The first time that you told him you loved him, he wanted to cry, even though he can't and doesn't fully understand why people do it in the first place. "Why are you crying?" he asked, squinting. "Because you're suffocating me!" you wheezed. "Oh."
He uses his one-eyed form at home, knowing you understand it's easier and more comfortable. He really doesn't understand how to read all that well, so you taught him. He got the hang of it quickly and likes to leave you notes and texts. He constantly has tabs on you. Whether it be him coming into your job to walk around and talk to you, or him being in his hair ball form and in your shoulder or bag or something. Always around you. Always watching. Always comes back. (I'm so sorry.)
Calls you things like my love, dear, my dearest, sweetheart, gorgeous, beautiful, and things like that. Loves, loves, loves when you call him pretty boy/girl. Practically melts in your arms. They also love when you call them sweet things and mumble sweet nothings in her ear while you're together, especially when you're cuddling. Adores it when you run your fingers through her hair, and a soft purring emanates from him.
It may or may not wrap around your hand when you try to pull away....
That's all for now, guys! I'll be making more of these if I think of them. Requests and asks are open, so feel free to do that! (I'm so bored.) Stay safe, hydrated, and happy! Love you all! <3
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livlaughloveluke · 6 months
Text
𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧- 𝐣.𝐜
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𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: you get jealous of jacks cast mate, when in reality you have nothing to worry about
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: reader is kinda self conscious? a little angst turned to fluff :)
based off this request: Reader thinks jack likes one of his other coworkers (or him and r could be childhood friends) but he acc likes her idk from @wonderstruck4llthew4yhome
𝐚/𝐧: hope you enjoy!! jack is SUCH a loverboy
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jacks radiant laugh echoed from your computer screen, which made you pause the video and start sulking. 
you were currently watching an interview over his new romance movie, and god did it make you feel envious.
while his heavenly giggle usually made you grin from ear to ear, this time it made you frown, and you could feel tears forming in your eyes. 
you were upset because he was laughing at his cast mate, annie. annie played his love interest in the movie, and you could tell she liked him. and judging by the way he was looking at her in the video, you thought he liked her back.
she was gorgeous, and talented, and really funny too. everything you thought you weren’t. 
and the real gut punch is you have no right to be jealous. jack and you weren’t dating, but were only childhood friends. you told eachother everything, and spent countless of hours hanging out.
although, there was one thing you didn’t mention to him. you were helplessly in love with him. your crush developed when you were 13, and it never stopped growing. 
you felt like your heart had been stomped on and crumpled up after watching the interview.
it made you feel worse when you realized you were being to much of a “jealous girlfriend” to someone you weren’t even dating. 
tears couldn’t help but fall as you scrolled through the comments. 
user37638- jack and annie DEFINITELY have something going on 👀
jackslover- wait are him and the blond girl dating?!??
anniesfan4lifeeee- jack and annie would lowkey make such a cute couple omg?!?
you started to feel worse as you realized that maybe he was happy. maybe he did really like her, and you needed to support him. ruining fourteen years of friendship over some stupid feelings is crazy. right?
that was until you hear the front door to your apartment opening. oh shit. jack was supposed to come over at 12! why is he here so early?!? 
you checked the time, only to find out that you had spent the whole day sobbing in your, now very messy, bed. you didn’t have time to react before jack was entering your room.
he immediately noticed your tears and went up to you. you stood up out of bed, still wearing your pajamas. well the oversized shirt you had on was his, but whatever.
jack brought you in to a warm embrace, his arms wrapping tightly around your waist. after some time, he let go to face you.
he used his thumb to wipe off your tears, looking at you with a concerned expression. 
“y/n what happened? you know i hate seeing you like this. do i need to fight someone for you?” jack asks, trying lightening the mood a little.
you smiled, and he took that as his own personal victory.
“its nothing jack. anyways, how was filming in greece?” you say, trying your best to plaster on a happy face and skip over the topic. it didn’t work. god dammit jack, why are you so caring?!?
“it’s not nothing. y/n tell me, please.” jack looks at you with those adorable brown eyes and you know you have to tell him. even if you don’t want to, its best for jack to know.
“if i tell you this, you have to pinky promise this wont ruin anything.” you say, sticking your finger out. he locks pinkies with you, and you both kiss your thumb, signifying that the promise will be kept. jack then waits patiently for you to continue.
“i like you. more than a friendly way. I’ve felt this way since we were thirteen. if you dont like me back, that fine i guess! or if you like annie I totally understand and i think you would make a cute couple-“ 
jack cuts you off quickly after hearing the last sentence. 
“i dont want annie. i want you.” 
you look up at him shocked, your mouth slightly open. you notice him looking at your lips, and you get the hint. you close the gap, and place your plump lips on his. 
its was like your lips were puzzle pieces, because of how perfectly they fit together. all of your envy washed away at the heavenly sensation. 
you both pulled away from the passionate kiss, your lips coated in a mixture of you and jacks spit. you make eye contact with him, and smile. you could finally call him yours. 
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ateotd-izzy · 4 months
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it’s nice to have a friend - stiles stilinski x fem!reader
“you been stressed out lately, yeah, me too”
summary: you didn’t have many friends in middle school, not until you met a boy one afternoon. it was nice to have a friend. especially one that lasted as long as stiles did.
“something gave you the nerve to touch my hand”
notes: friends to lovers (obv), it’s just very sweet and fluffy, i just love him sm :3
“it’s nice to have a friend”
the first time you met stiles stilinski was on a cold winter afternoon back in the seventh grade.
snow in beacon hills wasn’t common at all, so you weren’t exactly prepared for the freezing weather.
and to top it all off, while you were in school, you had lost your gloves at some point during the day.
so now you were walking home with the fear that you were going to lose your hands to frostbite.
as you walked, you noticed the boy walking on the sidewalk next to you looking at you while you rubbed your hands together.
“you could borrow one of mine if you’d like.” he suddenly spoke and you turned to look at him.
“what?” 13-year-olds didn’t exactly always have the best manners.
he pulled one of his gloves off of his hand and held it out to you. “you don’t wanna get hypothermia. i did a science report on it, like, two years ago. it’s not cool.”
“who are you?” you asked as you took the glove and slipped it onto your hand.
“oh, right, i’m stiles.” he held out his bare hand to you.
“y/n.” you smiled, shaking his hand with your own non-gloved hand. “sheriff stilinski’s your dad, right?”
“yup.” stiles nodded with a smile. “are you doing anything this afternoon?”
“no… why?”
“wanna hang out?”
this strange and very sweet boy who you had just met was asking to hang out with you.
“what would we do?” you asked curiously as the two of you walked.
“i have a bunch of video games.”
you smiled. “yeah, sounds like fun.”
so stiles walked you to his house where the two of you hung out playing video games in his living room until his dad got home.
by then you had lost track of time and had to go home.
“see you tomorrow, y/n.” stiles smiled from the door as you walked down onto the sidewalk.
“see ya, stiles.”
the next day wasn’t as cold. the snow had all melted and it was warm enough to not have to wear too many layers.
at school, stiles sat at the desk next to yours first period and discreetly passed you a note when the teacher wasn’t looking.
you carefully unfolded it to see his messy handwriting across the lines on the paper.
wanna hang out with me and scott today?
it’s nice to have a friend
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five years later you sat beside stiles on the hood of his jeep.
he had parked on the cliff side so the two of you could watch the sunset.
the sky before you was a soft, light pink as the sun had begun sinking behind the horizon.
this night was one where the two of you were free of the troubles of werewolves, banshees, dread doctors and theo raeken, who had recently been sent to hell.
you’d had a crush on the boy sitting beside you, your best friend, for the last two years at least. around the time where all the werewolf troubles began back in your sophomore year.
and this night in particular, you didn’t have a curfew. your parents thought you were staying at stiles’ house for the night, which wasn’t exactly a lie.
most nights you would sneak out when it came to supernatural stuff, but this time it was just you and stiles hanging out.
“wanna play 20 questions?” you asked as the sky began to grow darker, but the pink and orange stayed.
“why? we practically know everything about each other.” stiles chuckled and you shrugged.
“we haven’t been able to just hang out like this lately.” you pointed out. “there’s always been something else.”
so stiles agreed to the game and the two of you played. most of the questions were silly, stuff about movies and games that you already knew the answers to.
but some of the questions were more real. about school and college, or scott’s lycanthropy.
then stiles told you, unprovoked, about how stressed out he had been lately. with theo, donovan, the dread doctors, scott, and the overwhelming fear that everyone was going to leave him behind.
“yeah, i get it. i absolutely get it.” you bumped his shoulder with your own. “but you don’t need to worry. you’ll always have me.”
stiles smiled as he looked at you beside him, while you looked back at the sunset.
he looked down at your hand, which was sitting on the hood of his jeep in between the two of you.
and slowly, despite his nerves jittering, he moved his hand from his leg and sat it beside yours, your fingers brushing against his.
stiles didn’t know that small touch sent what felt like a jolt of electricity through your body and butterflies into your stomach.
then, while looking forward, stiles moved his hand even closer and sat his on top of yours.
your lips fought back the smile that was growing on your face, and stiles saw it from his peripheral vision as he laced your fingers together.
he held your hand tightly in his and you put your head on his shoulder as the sun disappeared from sight.
“i like you, stiles.” you spoke softly and stiles didn’t answer. for a moment you thought you had messed something up, so you lifted your head off his shoulder.
then stiles said the same thing. “i like you, too.”
and then he kissed you.
it’s nice to have a friend
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“stiles, put me down!” you exclaimed, your arms wrapped around his neck tightly in fear that he would drop you.
he laughed but slowly helped you stand on the porch.
your hands trailed up his body until they were sitting on his shoulders before you kissed him.
his hands moved to hold your hips and yours drifted up to the sides of his face.
you pulled back and smiled.
“come on, mrs. stilinski, into the house we go.” stiles pulled the keys from his pocket and unlocked the front door.
you and stiles had gotten married just a month ago, not long after you had finished college and he started in the fbi.
as the two of you walked into your house, you took stiles’ hand in yours and intertwined your fingers.
you had moved out of beacon hills and now lived somewhere where it snowed a lot more frequently. that made you happy, because snow always reminded you of the day you first met stiles.
you watched the snow fall outside through the kitchen window while you started to make dinner.
“babe,” you called for stiles from the kitchen and he was before you in a flash.
“yeah?”
“you wanna watch a movie while we eat?” you asked and his face lit up the same way it would back when you were teenagers.
“star wars?” he asked, quirking his eyebrows and pressing his lips together, his own little pleading face.
“sure.” you chuckled and turned to grab something from the fridge.
stiles’ arms wrapped their way around your middle from behind and his chin sat on your shoulder. kissing your cheek, stiles smiled as he hugged you tightly.
“you want help with dinner?” he mumbled against your neck.
“yeah.” you lifted one of your hands back to brush through his hair. “you want to help?”
“of course.” he pressed a few slow kisses to your neck before slowly letting go of you and moving to the counter. “what are we making?”
it’s nice to have a friend
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tags: @brvceyamada
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elliesbelle · 1 year
Text
nobody compares to you
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chapter 4
pairing: ellie x reader
synopsis: you're in your junior year of college and at a party, you run into the girl who broke your heart: ellie williams. despite the time it took to reset your life, will you risk a broken heart again for her?
content warnings: modern college au, cursing, angst, dealer!ellie, also toxic!ellie kind of, mentions of marijuana, sexual speech and content, brief mention of straight girls experimenting with lesbianism, toxic family relationships, lesbian situationship, descriptions and mentions of death & grieving, depressive episodes, cheating if you squint but it's more betrayal than cheating really?, bad driving for like two seconds, description and mention of vomit, minors do not interact
word count: 7k
chapters: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen
series masterlist
my masterlist
i have a ko-fi if you like my work so much that you feel compelled to tip me ♡︎
the "nobody compares to you" spotify playlist
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Freshman Year, Early Spring
“Are you coming to Jess and Els’ later tonight?” Dina asked, snuggling your pink stuffed bear and laying upside down at the head of your bed with her legs outstretched to the ceiling. 
“Hmm?” You said, distracted. You were rummaging in your messy drawers, trying to find the other pair of a sock you were currently holding in your hand. 
“Ellie said she wants to do a post-midterm celebration with a movie night, which just means we’re gonna watch some lame old sci-fi movie that she and Jesse picked out.” 
“Maybe,” You said, tossing the sock into the other contents of the drawer, giving up. “Can’t stay too late, though. Raf is picking me up really early in the morning tomorrow.” 
“Ooh, can I finally meet The Hottie Cousin Rafael in person?” Dina said, dropping her legs and turning onto her belly to face you. 
You rolled your eyes and said, “You have Jesse, Dina.” 
She shrugged and said, “I bet Hottie Cousin Rafael wouldn’t make me watch lame movies all the time.” 
“Raf is far nerdier than Jesse is, I promise.” 
“If he’s as hot as he looks on FaceTime, his hotness will cancel out the nerdiness.” 
You scrunched up your nose in disgust at Dina’s thirsting after your de facto older brother. 
“I’m not the best judge, but Jesse’s not not hot.” 
Dina laughed. 
“I’m telling El you said that.” 
Your cheeks flushed as you said, “She’ll just say the same thing!” 
“All men are basically ugly in Ellie’s eyes. She’ll say, ‘Jesse’s the uglier version of a walker from The Walking Dead’ or some shit like that.” 
You giggled, knowing that was probably true. 
“Do you have to leave early for spring break?” Dina whined. 
You gave her a sad smile. 
“Sorry, D. You know how my mother is.” 
Dina groaned and, pointing to the plushie she was holding, said, “Barbie Bear, when will you come to life at night Toy Story-style and finally horrifically murder this awful lady?” 
“Dina!” You exclaimed, grabbing your pink bear from her. “Don’t you corrupt Barbie Bear! She is an innocent soul!” 
“Oh, she’s been corrupted already,” Dina said, snatching Barbie Bear back. “I’m sure she’s been a witness to the deplorable things you and Ellie have gotten up to in here.” 
“Dina!” You squealed once more, blushing furiously and hiding your face behind your hands. “She and I have not!” 
“Oh please,” Dina rolled her eyes. “Ellie comes back to her and Jesse’s place the morning after spending the night here with the same cocky ass look that Jesse has after we fuck.” 
“Oh my god—” 
Dina cackled and you giggled nervously. 
“So are you two officially together now or—?” 
“Who, me and Ellie?” You asked. 
“No, you and Jesse.” Dina said sarcastically, throwing Barbie Bear at you. 
You caught the bear at the last second, laughing as you climbed onto your bed with her and handed the plushie back to her. 
“Shut up!” You giggled. “But, umm. I’m not really sure what we are, if I’m being honest.” 
Dina groaned and said, “Ugh, you’re both useless!” 
“I’ve only had one real girlfriend before!” 
“So has Ellie!” 
“Then ask her instead!” 
“Oh, I have.” Dina said, raising her eyebrows. 
You perked up suddenly. 
“Wait, what did she say?” 
“Oh my god, can you two just have the talk already?!” Dina groaned, exasperated at her friends’ incompetence. 
You blushed harder than ever. 
“I just… I just don’t know if she feels the same way I do.” 
Dina rolled her eyes. 
“You’re the first person she texts every morning, and mind you, Ellie hates texting. She will spend an hour in that stupid Jeep of hers in the parking lot outside until you get home from class just to hang out with you. Three of her five hoodies are somewhere here in your room right now. Tara told me that you’ve sexiled her at least twice already.” 
“We have not!” 
“Honey, she literally spent two separate nights at mine and Astrid’s because you and Ellie were over here—” 
Dina made a circle with her right thumb and pointer finger and repeatedly inserted her left pointer in it. 
“OH MY GOD—” You screamed into a pillow. 
Dina was over the moon teasing you as you grabbed your blanket and hid underneath it. 
“I need to offer to do her laundry for two weeks or something,” You said, your voice muffled from beneath the covers. “I’m the worst roommate ever.” 
Dina chuckled, saying, “Don’t worry, she likes you and Ellie together. Just maybe shoot her a warning text before you two wanna scissor, or whatever you lesbians do.” 
“Oh please, like you and Ellie never did anything together.” You said, emerging from underneath your blanket. 
“Okay, first of all,” Dina said, putting up one finger. “Ellie and I kissed once at our sophomore homecoming dance, and that was just to make Jesse jealous.” 
You chuckled. 
Dina put up a second finger. 
“Two, it was like kissing a cousin, so that obviously resulted in zero sexual scenarios whatsoever from that point on. I have never once been compelled to call Ellie ‘daddy’ ever in my life.” 
You screamed into your pillow once more at this. 
Dina put both fingers down and put her middle finger up. 
“And three, I have had gay sex with women before, but they were both also bisexual and there was no scissoring involved!” 
You were laughing uncontrollably now with Dina attacking you with Barbie Bear. 
“Okay, okay!” You giggled, attempting to shield yourself. “Why are we talking about scissoring again?” 
“Because!” 
One hit from Barbie Bear. 
“You are avoiding!” 
Another hit from Barbie Bear. 
“My questions!” 
A third hit from Barbie Bear. 
“About you!” 
An additional hit from Barbie Bear. 
“And Ellie!” 
A final hit from Barbie Bear that landed on your face. 
You snatched your stuffed animal away from Dina before she could swing it once more, pulling it away from her reach. 
“Okay, no more abusing me with Barbie Bear!” You said.
She chuckled. 
“And…” You started, serious now. “I’ve never experienced this before. I’ve had one real girlfriend, which was a high school disaster.” 
You sighed. 
“I briefly saw that one girl Adriana at the beginning of the year before we both realized she was just a rebound to my ex. I’ve hooked up with a few other girls since, and I was even Rebecca’s first lesbian college experiment kiss before she realized she was just straight.” 
Dina was sitting straight up now, staring at you intently and listening attentively. You pulled Barbie Bear into your chest. 
“Ellie is… she feels different. Something in my heart just yearns for her. She makes me feel like I must have done something so great in a past life that her just being in my life is the reward. She makes me feel forgiven and understood and—” 
You paused your Ellie sermon when you made eye contact with Dina, who was looking at you with a soft expression. 
“Sorry!” You threw your hands up apologetically and proceeded to cover your face with them in embarrassment. “I sound like a 12-year-old experiencing their first real crush!” 
Dina chuckled and pulled your hands away from your face. 
“No, you don’t. You sound like someone who Ellie deserves to have in her life, someone who sees her fully and appreciates all the good and bad. She’s gone through her own fair share of romantic and sexual bullshit too, and knowing that she now has you?” 
Dina placed an affectionate hand on your cheek. 
“I know that I don’t have to worry anymore.” 
“Dina, you’re gonna make me cry right now.” 
Dina leaned back into your pillows, laughing. 
“You started it!” 
“You sounded like you were giving away a bride!” 
“Wow, not even officially together yet, but somehow you’re already getting married.” 
You groaned and flopped onto your back. 
“I love her, Dina.” 
“No shit, babe.” 
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After the talk you had with Dina, you both went over to Jesse and Ellie’s dorm room. Even though Jesse was a sophomore and Ellie a freshman, they were somehow able to convince the campus housing department to let them room together after both their roommates dropped out during the first month of classes. 
The “lame old sci-fi movie” that they’d picked out turned out to be Jurassic Park, which you’d already seen several times, courtesy of your nerdy older cousin Rafael. Dina was playfully criticizing every little bit of the movie to tease Jesse, who was taking her critiques to heart. As the couple were lovingly bickering with each other on the floor, you and Ellie sat on her bed underneath a blanket. 
You leaned against her shoulder while she was tracing patterns on the palm of your hand. Though she was concentrated on the movie, she would habitually give you a kiss on top of your head, sometimes following with her nose nuzzling your hair. She’d not said she loved you so far, but gestures like this felt like her way of saying it. You felt warm and content and the happiest you’ve ever been in your life. 
After Jesse convinced the rest of you to watch the movie’s sequel (as punishment to Dina for talking through the first), you’d made up your mind to change your spring break plans. 
You were still planning on returning home for the break, but since Ellie, Dina, and Jesse were spending the weekend on campus and not returning to their hometown until Monday, you resolved to at least spend more time with them. You knew that two weeks of spring break didn’t seem like a long time in the grand scheme of things. But the thought of being away from your friends whom you loved so deeply, but especially from Ellie, hurt far more than it did when you left home for college in the first place. 
And after your talk with Dina earlier that day, you’d also decided to be honest with Ellie about your feelings for her before you briefly went your separate ways. You knew that maybe it wasn’t the greatest timing to profess your love for the girl of your dreams right before zero physical contact for fourteen days. But Dina helped you further realize the affection you had for Ellie, and you knew you couldn’t go home without letting her know. You also figured that if all went wrong, you could always use the two weeks to save face before returning to campus. 
During the scene with Jeff Goldblum and Julianne Moore’s characters are hiding in a trailer from the T-Rex parents, you texted your cousin Rafael. 
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A minute or two passed before he responded. 
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You reply immediately. 
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Three text bubbles loaded for a second before two texts appeared. 
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You felt your cheeks burn. 
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You could almost feel your cousin chuckling through text.
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You breathed a sigh of relief and gratitude.
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You smiled, your heart full and thankful for your favourite cousin. 
Jesse whooped and Dina squealed as she pulled you into a tight hug when you told them you were leaving in two days instead of the next morning. Ellie didn’t say much in the moment, but you felt a glow of happiness radiating from her at the news. When your friends had settled down and continued the movie, Ellie pulled you closer to her and wrapped her arms around you. You leaned into her embrace as she silently decorated your neck with kisses, resolving to call your mother tomorrow morning to break the news. 
You never made that call.
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You awoke to your phone buzzing angrily underneath your pillow. Discombobulated, you didn’t fully perceive your surroundings. You’d fallen asleep on Ellie’s bed, still wrapped in her arms. Jesse and Dina had eventually migrated at some point in the night to Jesse’s bed and were sound asleep. You saw that Ellie had plugged your phone into her charger after you’d fallen asleep. Stroking her hair lightly as she slept, you looked at your phone to see it was your mother calling. 
Before accepting the call, you’d seen that you had 7 missed calls and 4 voicemails. You groaned. Was your mother really that upset? 
You didn’t seem that alarmed until you saw that only 6 of those calls and 3 of those voicemails were from your mother. One of each was from your uncle, Rafael’s father. 
Why is Uncle calling me? Did she guilt him into guilting me to come home?
Sighing, you finally accepted your mother’s call. 
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Ellie, Jesse, and Dina all awoke to you screaming. All three were at different levels of disorientation at first, but upon seeing your shrieking figure having fallen to the floor, they all rushed to your side. No one seemed sure what to do at first, other than trying to stand you up (to no avail) and ask what was wrong. It was Dina who snapped into sense first, noticing that you were still on a call with your mother. 
She picked up the phone, rushed through an introduction, and worryingly inquired what was happening. Ellie and Jesse watched as her mouth fell open and her eyes widened with shock. She listened to your mother for a minute or two before bringing the other two into the loop. 
Your cousin Rafael was killed in a hit-and-run that morning. Since he was no longer tasked to bring you home that day, he made impromptu plans with old college friends to meet up for an early morning coffee. He was crossing an intersection on the way to the café when a car decided to run a red light. He died on impact. 
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Your spring break was consumed completely by black clothing, floral wreaths of white lilies and roses, and an overstocked fridge of homemade food that your family barely touched. You saw no happy faces, only red eyes and quivering lips. You were torn out of the blissful bubble of your college life into a waking, familial nightmare. 
Rafael was your first cousin and not your brother. But it was as if at birth, he claimed you as his sister and the rest was history. 
Everyone who knew either of you was aware of the sibling bond you’d shared. He was the most important person to you for the first 18 years of your life. More than your parents, more than any other family member, more than any of your friends. Saying that he was your best friend was an understatement. 
The two weeks back home with your family were a black haze. You remained locked up in your room for the majority of the time, and when your presence was required, you spoke only when spoken to. You alternated between fits of sobbing and near-comatose states. 
Your only comfort was your uncle, Rafael’s father. You never knew your parents to give genuine love and affection, so you grew up seeing your uncle as a parental figure. Even as he raised Rafael alone as a single father, he often took you under his wing and provided you with a place of home away from your parents’ house. 
Your parents, especially your mother, were preoccupied with putting on the show of a broken family to sympathizers. It was your uncle who made sure you continued to eat and drink every day. He was the one to give you the gentle push to leave your room for the funeral, knowing that you’d one day regret not going. He even spoke to your friends on the phone when you’d stopped responding. By the end of your spring break, Dina had his personal phone number so she could call twice a day for daily updates, which she would promptly share with Jesse and Ellie. 
Unlike your mother, your uncle placed no blame on you for his son’s death. He knew that the one true person to blame was the careless driver in the car that hit him. But your mother was a different story. 
In those last few days before you needed to return to campus, your mother enlightened you with her true feelings. 
She had decided your “selfishness” in inconveniencing your family was what decided Rafael’s fate. If he had been on his way to pick you up from college, he never would have been crossing that intersection. According to her, you’d placed insignificant people you’d known for less than a year over your own family. 
If you were a weaker person, you’d have crumbled under her accusations. She was quite skilled in twisting the truth to her point of view, and she was skilled even more so in making people believe the worst of themselves. But Rafael and your uncle raised you better. You may not have been the most secure person growing up, but they made you feel loved. 
Despite your mother’s malice, you were grateful for her outburst. It snapped you back into reality. Your fury at your mother reminded you that Rafael would not have wanted you to give in to her guilt. 
You knew that his death was not your fault. Of course you were still grieving, but you loved Rafael so much that you would not allow your mother to force you back into a state of living death. Your uncle made sure of this when he drove you back to campus. 
The few hours drive to your dorm, you and your uncle had the most intense and intimate conversation you’d ever had with him. You bawled, you even smiled and laughed a few times, and you talked about the future. It pained you to watch him drive away, the last real living connection you had left to Rafael. 
You may not have been the depressive zombie you were at the news of Rafael’s death, but you no longer lived blissfully in your college bubble. Still, your friends remained sympathetic and loving as you dealt with your grief. 
Ellie remained just as caring and affectionate, at least at first. She made sure to spend all her free time with you to make sure you weren’t left alone to spiral into your depressive thoughts. She didn’t try anything sexual with you and made sure to respect your mourning boundaries. She even set an alarm every week to make sure you were on time for your video therapy sessions (your uncle set you up with a therapist to make sure you remained stable). 
To the outside observer, your grieving process was progressing naturally and healthily. You barely missed class, you still saw your friends on a regular basis, you weren’t bursting out in tears (or so most of your friends thought). No one else felt the need to worry about you more than they had to. 
Except for Dina. 
Having lost her parents at a young age, it was mostly her and her older sister taking care of each other. Part of why she grew to be so close to Jesse was because his parents were family friends who helped them out when their parents passed. 
Dina has dealt with great familial loss before and she saw the signs of someone barely keeping it together. 
That’s why before your freshman year ended, Dina invited you to stay with her and her sister for the summer. 
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Summer Before Sophomore Year: Jackson 
Calling your parents to let them know that you weren’t coming back home for most of the summer was a difficult conversation. Your mother threw a fit and your father chastised you for upsetting your mother. But with encouragement of your friends and your uncle (who promised you that he’d ship essentials from your parents’ house to Dina’s as soon as he could), you eagerly accompanied Dina, Jesse, and Ellie to their hometown of Jackson. 
After just a few days in the town, you understood why the trio have remained friends since childhood. The community in Jackson was small but very tight-knit. Everyone knew each other and it seemed unusual for people to leave. They treated each other like family, and you envied the comfy, homey feeling the town radiated. 
Dina’s sister Talia wasn’t around very often, consumed by her full-time job. You didn’t fully understand what she did for work, only that it had something to do with computers. The few times you were actually able to spend time with her, you enjoyed seeing the repertoire between her and her younger sister. Though ten years older than Dina, they treated each other like peers. You saw how Dina grew to be such an emotionally mature person. Talia accepted you with open arms, fulfilling the role of big sister the entire time you were there. 
On the third day of your stay, you finally met Joel. He was Ellie’s adoptive father who took in Ellie at a young age. Though they were not biologically related, you found yourself often chuckling over how similar the two were. 
Ellie’s foul-mouthed behaviour mirrored that of Joel’s, which was a welcome contrast to your parent’s curt and strict speech. He told stories of his past, many of which involved him getting into all sorts of trouble. Though he seemed to have grown out of it, you saw that impulsivity and temperament in Ellie today. 
He was a kind, old man, and you saw why Ellie admired him so. You also noticed just how much he loved Ellie as if he’d birthed her himself. You found yourself desiring the kind of parent Joel was. You had your uncle throughout your childhood, of course, but you still had to go home to the cruelty of your parents at the end of the day. 
Joel seemed to be aware that Ellie dealt back at your university. It was through him that Ellie actually knew her plug. This old pal of Joel’s, Eugene, was originally her (and Dina’s and Jesse’s) dealer back in high school. When they’d graduated and started attending university, Eugene introduced Ellie to an old contact who grew not far from campus once she started dealing. Joel would roll his eyes and scoff any time the topic of Ellie being a dealer came up, but he genuinely didn’t seem to mind as long as she was smart about it. 
On nights when Dina and Jesse were both busy, you found yourself spending the evening at Joel’s house. He was very keen on having you over for dinner often, complaining that Ellie was a very boring conversation partner. You bonded quickly over a number of things, such as your mutual love of coffee (to which Ellie rolled her eyes, claiming that a simple hot chocolate was far superior to that “burnt shit”) and being Ellie’s impulse control. 
About nearly a month into your stay, Dina was picking you up from another dinner at Joel’s and Ellie’s place to walk you back to her house. Both waved you goodbye at the front door (not before you gave Ellie a peck on the cheek) and watched as you and Dina linked arms and walked into the streetlight-lit darkness. 
Once you and Dina were out of their sight, Joel put his hand on Ellie’s shoulder. 
“Come on, kiddo. We need to talk.” 
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“I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about, old man,” Ellie exclaimed, throwing her hands up in the air and leaning into the living room couch. 
“Ellie.” 
“Joel.” Ellie said, mocking his serious tone. 
“That girl is so in love with you, and it’s plain to anyone who sees y’all together.” 
Ellie crossed her arms, saying nothing. 
“And it’s as clear as day that you’re head over heels for her too.” 
Ellie scoffed and said, “Don’t assume shit, old timer.” 
“I ain’t assuming anythin’. I know you, and so do Dina and Jesse.” 
“You’ve been talking to Dina and Jesse behind my back?” 
“Now, hold on there,” Joel said, taking a seat at the lounge chair next to the couch Ellie sat on. “They were just tellin’ me about what y’all get up to at that big university, and we just got to talkin’ about you. There weren’t no secret meetings or anythin’ conspirin’ like that.” 
“And what did those two have to say?” 
“That y’all have been basically joined to the hip since y’all met.” Joel said, leaning back. 
“That’s not true—” Ellie began angrily. 
“Look, kid, no need to be pitchin’ a hissy fit. I’m just relayin’ what those two have been observin’. But since y’all took her home, apparently you’ve been actin’ a tad different towards her.” 
“What does that mean?” 
Joel sighed. 
“Ellie, this girl was all you talked about nonstop that whole year you were up at that school. I already know the girl’s favourite colour and coffee order just from the phone calls we had.” 
“I did not talk about her that much.” 
“Yes, you did. There’s no point in denyin’ it.” 
Ellie glared. 
“Now, I wanna know why it seems like you’ve changed your tune on her.” 
“Really, ‘changed my tune?’ Man, you’re getting too old.” 
“Don’t go changin’ the subject. Now, I can see how you’re still clearly sweet on her, but there’s somethin’ a little off. Like you’re holdin’ back from her, or somethin’ like that.” 
“I’m just not a people person, Joel, and you know that.” 
“Doesn’t matter. Ellie,” He leaned forward, placing his elbows on his knees and looked directly at her. “Do you love her?” 
“Come on, man—” 
“Ellie.” 
Ellie met Joel’s eyes and saw that he was waiting for a truthful answer. She exhaled, took a beat, and responded. 
“I don’t love her.” 
Joel sighed sadly. 
“Thought I taught you better than that, kiddo.” 
She looked away, saying, “We’re not even dating.” 
“Does she know that?  
“She’s not stupid.”
“That’s not what I asked.” 
Ellie stood up, exasperated. 
“Why does any of this matter, Joel!” 
“Because that poor darlin’ just lost her own kin, so if you’re fixin’ to break her heart, you need to stop stringin’ her along.” 
“I’m not doing anything!” 
“I like this girl for you, Ellie. She’s got a kind soul that somehow blossomed past her upbringin’. She brings out the best in you, even if you try to hide it. She thinks the world of you, kid, bless her heart. Don’t do somethin’ you’ll regret.” 
“I haven’t done shit!” Ellie yelled, standing up from the couch. 
“Daggum it, stop actin’ childish and listen to what I’m sayin’ here, Ellie.” 
Ellie stormed out of the room without another word. 
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After the conversation she had with Joel, Ellie began acting distant towards you. It started with the little things: keeping her hands in her pockets while you walked around town to avoid holding your outstretched hand, no longer inviting you over to dinner at Joel’s unless Dina or Jesse planned on coming along, no more public displays of affection and very limited tenderness in private. 
Dina was right in her assumption that you were barely holding it together. The anxiety as a result of Ellie’s behaviour, on top of your grief over your cousin’s death, began unraveling you. 
Your late-night talks with Dina became less and less. You began sitting next to her or Jesse more often than you did Ellie. Dina would walk in on you completely spaced out and it took several minutes to get a verbal response out of you. 
Dina and Jesse were sure that if you came back with them to Jackson, being around the presence of those who loved you as opposed to people who resented you would ease your grieving process. They didn’t, however, predict that Ellie become a hurdle to your progress. And they certainly did not predict Ellie’s idiotic actions that followed. 
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“I thought we were having a movie night,” Jesse said, eyebrows furrowed. “I brought DVDs.” 
Ellie chuckled, saying, “You know there are these things called ‘streaming services’ now, Jess.” 
“Hypocrite. You and Joel have stacks of DVDs of every action and sci-fi movie ever made in your living room.” 
“What can I say, I’ve gotten with the times.” 
“Like hell you have.” 
You, Dina, and Jesse were all bunched up on the pull-out couch in Dina’s basement (where you were residing for the summer). Jesse was messing with the TV’s remote to find the right input while you and Dina were snuggled up underneath the same blanket. Your tired eyes watched as Ellie pulled her flannel on and rolled her sleeves up, revealing that fern tattoo you loved so much on her right forearm. 
“Who the fuck is more important than us, anyway?” Dina said, frowning. 
Ellie chuckled again, saying, “We hang out almost every day, D. You’ll survive the night.” 
“You’re not coming back after dinner?” 
“We’ll see, but don’t wait up.” 
Your eyes then fell down to your fingers, fiddling with a loose thread on the blanket. You haven’t spoken out loud once tonight since Ellie’d walked in. 
“You’re banned from our friend group now. You may reapply in 3-6 months.” Dina said, flipping Ellie off. 
“Literally one dinner, drama queen.” 
“Where are you even going?” 
“Rivers Café.” 
You didn’t notice how Jesse’s and Dina’s faces fell. 
“Gonna be late, so see you guys later.” Ellie said, walking up the stairs without a second glance. 
After a beat or two, Jesse spoke. 
“What the actual fuck.” 
“Jesse—“ Dina began. 
“I love her, but god damn it.” Jesse got up and started shuffling through the DVDs he brought. 
There was a palpable tension in the air for the rest of the night. An old martial arts movie was playing, but none of you were paying much attention. Nobody said anything, besides a comment every now and again from Dina noting how unrealistic some fighting move was. 
Ellie didn’t come back to Dina’s that night. 
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Two weeks before classes started, your things were packed to return to your parents’ house. You didn’t want to leave, but you needed to properly prepare for the start of your junior year. 
Dina was watchful and clingy before you left, constantly letting you know that the first thing she was going to do when you all returned to campus was hunt you down for a coffee date. Jesse would chuckle at this, saying that he’d probably see you when she dragged him along to it. 
Dina’s sister Talia said goodbye to you three days before your departure, needing to leave for a brief business trip the day before. She pulled you into a very tight hug, telling you that you were always welcome in their home and to feel free to tag along with Dina during any school breaks. 
You had a last dinner at Joel’s the night before you left. He made you and Ellie a simple pasta dish, which you learned was his late daughter Sarah’s favourite meal. He and you shared a sweet and intimate conversation where you both opened up about your shared familial losses. He told you about Sarah and you talked about Rafael. You understood why Joel was so protective over Ellie, having lost Sarah when she was only 12. You were happy that Ellie had someone like that in her life. 
Surprisingly, Ellie had offered to drive you home. You were starved for her attention, so you happily accepted. You offered for her to stay in your parents’ guest room for a night so she wouldn’t have to do so much driving in one day, but she said she didn’t mind. You felt disappointed, but you also didn’t want to subject her to your parents more than you had to. 
Dina and Jesse were the ones who waved you off (Joel sent his regards with Ellie when she came to Dina’s place to pick you up). You reassured them both that two weeks was not a very long time, though you were partly saying it out loud to convince yourself of it too. Your hand was the last thing they saw, waving from the passenger’s window of Ellie’s car. 
As you drove away from the gates of Jackson, there was not much noise except an Aminé song playing in the background and the occasional bird call heard outside from the rolled-down windows. 
There was a heaviness in your heart that weighed more and more the further from Jackson you were. Though you didn’t grow up there, the locals were so naturally welcoming. Being there felt like coming home every day. It was a safe and healthy place for you to process your grief. You wished summer went on forever. 
After a little while of silence between you and Ellie during which you lamented on your departure, you began to feel the awkwardness between you two. She hadn’t said anything and it didn’t seem like she had any intention to. You shrunk in your seat and began fidgeting and braced yourself to say something. 
“Um,” You started. “Thanks for offering to drive me back.” 
“No big deal,” Ellie replied. “Happy to do it.” 
You could feel your heart beating in your ears. 
“Why’d you decide to?” 
Ellie shrugged. “Just wanted to be a good friend.” 
You winced. 
“Is… is that what we are, El? Just friends?” You asked meekly. 
“I mean, yeah. Of course.” 
You felt your heart drop to your stomach. 
Is this how she really feels? Has this how she’s felt the whole year we’ve been doing all this? Have I just been reading into all this wrong? 
You attempted to suppress a bubbling anxiety attack, trying not to hyperventilate. Ellie seemed to be content with the silence and said nothing. 
Trying to distract yourself, you whipped out your phone to text Dina. 
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She replied almost immediately. 
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After a few seconds, another text from her popped up. 
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You chuckled silently, replying: 
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Ellie noticed the sudden sound, saying, “What are you laughing about?” 
“Just Jesse.” You said. 
“Ahh” was all she said in reply. 
You refused to look her way, feeling like seeing her disinterested face would make you feel worse than you already were. 
You texted Dina, saying: 
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Three text bubbles appeared before her texts popped up. 
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You gulped, even more anxious than before.
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You tried to ignore the nagging feeling that there was something else going on, something you weren’t privy to. You and Ellie were inseparable most of freshman year, even before you were explicitly doing things that regular friends didn’t do. 
What’s changed? 
Sometime during your internal struggle, you’d drifted off to sleep. You woke up groggy and disoriented, taking a moment to realize you were still in the passenger seat of Ellie’s Jeep. The sun was further west than before. You glanced at the clock on the dashboard. 
“How much further do we have?” You asked, voice raspy. 
“About an hour or so.” 
“Oh.” 
You’d been asleep for longer than you thought. Feeling guilty, you wiped some drool off your chin and yawned quietly. 
“I’m sorry for passing out on you.” 
“All good.” Ellie said. 
“Did I snore?” 
Ellie shrugged and you stopped yourself from letting out an incredibly audible and frustrated sigh. 
Five or ten minutes passed during which you were wrestling with yourself on making use of the rest of the time to confront Ellie. In the end, you decided that two weeks of this anxiety eating at you was not worth it. 
“Els?” 
She didn’t seem to hear you. 
You cleared your throat and said a little louder, “Ellie.” 
“What’s up?” She said, dryly. 
You took a deep breath. 
“What’s been going on?” You asked. 
“What do you mean?” 
You bit the inside of your lip. 
“I mean…” You began. “You haven’t been yourself lately.” 
“I don’t really know what you’re talking about.” 
“Ellie, come on. You’ve been… different.” 
She didn’t answer. 
“Jesse and Dina both agree with me.” 
Her eyebrows furrowed. 
“I don’t really appreciate people talking about me behind my back.” 
“We’re not!” You exclaimed. “We’ve just been wondering why you’re so distant lately.” 
“Just cause I’m not much of a talker doesn’t mean I’ve been distant.” 
You used to talk all the time with me. 
“That’s not what I’m saying, Ellie. You don’t seem to like hanging out with us, and you cancel on us half the time. You don’t tell us what you’ve been up to or where you’ve been.” 
You gulped. 
“Like that movie night at Dina’s place. You agreed to come over for a sleepover, and you came for five minutes then bailed on us and didn’t even tell us where you were going.” 
“Yes, I did!” 
“Not ‘til the very end! You didn’t even tell us who you were seeing!” 
“Why does that even matter?” 
“It’s not that, Ellie! It’s just that you’ve been elusive and secretive, and I don’t like it!” 
“Well, that’s not really my problem, is it?” 
Her words pierced your heart and it took everything you had to keep going and not break down. 
Is that what I’ve become now? Your problem, Ellie? 
“I guess not.” You said quietly. 
A few minutes of silence passed. You were fidgeting in your seat once more while Ellie seemed completely disinterested in further conversation. 
But you refused to go back with all this unresolved. 
“Who did you see?” You asked suddenly. 
“Excuse me?” 
“At that café. Who did you go see?” 
“Why do you care?” Ellie scoffed. 
“Why won’t you answer?” 
Ellie rolled her eyes. 
“It was just an old friend, okay? Jesus,” She said, irritated. “I have other friends besides Jesse and Dina.” 
“Who was it, Ellie?” 
“Her name is Cat! God, enough with the questions.” 
You froze for a moment until you finally murmured, “Cat, your ex-girlfriend?” 
“Yeah, I guess so.” 
“You guess?” 
“What the fuck do you want from me, dude?” Ellie cried, coming to a stop at a red light a little rougher than needed. 
You blinked. 
“What?” You asked quietly. 
“What?” Ellie repeated, angrily. 
“Why did you call me that? You never… You always—” 
You always call me “babe.” Or “baby.” I thought I was your baby. 
“Whatever,” You said, shaking your head. “I just don’t know why you’d see her. I thought you hadn’t kept in contact with her since high school.” 
“We reconnected over the summer,” Ellie huffed, slowly putting her foot down on the accelerator. “Didn’t realize that was a fucking crime.” 
Your mouth quivered as silent, betraying tears began to fall. 
“Am I a joke to you, Ellie?” You whispered. 
“What?” 
“Am I a FUCKING joke to you?” You shouted. 
Ellie froze, almost swerving. She’d never heard you raise your voice this way. 
“I thought… I thought I meant more to you. I thought that we had something. What the fuck did I do wrong? What did I do?” 
Your right hand was wiping tears away while your left was clutching your stomach tightly. You felt like you needed to hurl. 
“You don’t look at me anymore. You don’t touch me. Why did you start talking to her again? Why wouldn’t you talk to me? Was I not fucking enough?” 
There was a pause before Ellie spoke. 
“You’re not my girlfriend. I have no obligation to you.” 
You felt as if the world disappeared from underneath you and you were falling. You were no longer in the passenger seat of Ellie’s car. No, you were plunging into a dark abyss, the same one that your friends had saved you from falling into when Rafael died. But here you were anyway. And it was Ellie who pushed you in. 
Before you knew it, Ellie had pulled up to the curb of your house. The sound of her engine turning off snapped you back into reality briefly. As you unbuckled yourself, you realized that on top of a plain black tank, you were wearing an unbuttoned flannel shirt that Ellie’d lent you. You tore it off and threw it to the floor. 
Before Ellie could even move, you were out of the car and pulling your bags out of Ellie’s backseat. By the time Ellie unbuckled herself and got out of the driver seat, you had all your bags in hand and ready to trudge up your parents’ driveway. 
You felt you probably looked ridiculous: tears and snot running down your face while you struggled with several heavy bags. But you didn’t care. You needed a wall between you and Ellie immediately. 
“Look—” Ellie started, taking a few steps. 
You dropped your bags and started towards her. 
“Fuck you, Ellie Williams.” You spat. 
“Fuck you for lying to me. Fuck you for leading me on. Fuck you for letting me fall in love with you. Fuck you for breaking my heart.” 
Ellie stopped in her tracks. 
“You... you—” She began, but her voice caught. 
By the time she found her voice again, you had already picked your bags up and hauled them to the front porch, keys already in your hand to unlock the door. She almost called your name out and yelled for you to wait, but you had thrown your bags through the threshold so quickly and disappeared almost immediately after them. 
Ellie jumped at the sound of the front door slamming. 
The second you had closed the door behind you, you leaned into one of your mother’s decorative urns and vomited.
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author's notes:
is barbie bear based on an actual stuffed bear i own and is named barbie and is that a picture of her in the icon at the beginning of the fic? no
i was SO so nervous to post this omg, cause not only is this a long ass chapter, but i wanted to make sure to give proper explanation to present day events. i hope i did it justice! lmk what y'all think!!
writing a flashback chapter was so fun?? might do at least another one at some point
also i meant to mention this in a previous chapter, but reader's cousin rafael is actually based on an older cousin of mine (who has the same name but we all call him by a nickname) who actually has a similar-ish relationship with me as reader does with her cousin (he and i are only a year apart tho and reader & her rafael are several years apart), but dw my cousin is still alive sdklfjslsldkfj
btw pls notice that rivers cafe is an actual place in the games hehe (so was ruston coffee in the last chapter)
oh also if you have ever been sexiled before, i am so sorry and you will see heaven as reparations (i on the other hand will not as i have been a sexiler myself oops)
taglist: @lonelyfooryouonly, @elliesinterlude, @sawaagyapong, @peppesgirl, @iconsoft, @maybeidohaveadhd, @ellieswifee, @valiantllamapersonpony-blog, @nil-eena, @echostinn, @uraesthete, @softbunlvr, @cherriessxinthespring, @amitycat, @chrissyfishywissy, @yevheniiaaa
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Welcome to Burlesque
Summary: Y/N is a burlesque dancer who works at Taz’s club. She and his son Hook start developing feelings for each other as they navigate the complicated world of organized crime.
Warnings: mob au, guns, blood, injuries, fighting, cussing, violence, angst, fluff, Jack being a little traitor, club environment, burlesque club, creepy man not taking a hint, drinking
A/N: should I have been writing a speech for college today? Yes. Did I? No. I wrote this💀😂 this burlesque idea is a little thing I came up with while listening to the burlesque movie’s soundtrack😂 and I thought it would be something fun to combine with a mob au. There will be a part 2 to this, and I hope you all enjoy!!!!! 🤍And thank you as always to @99hook for helping me brainstorm and come up with different little ideas for this fic💛💛✨
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Working at Taz's burlesque club was a dream come true to Y/N.
Was it a little bit shady? Yes.
Was she aware of the business the Senerchia family was in? It wasn't very hard to figure out being in the club as often as she was.
But did she care? She probably should have a lot more than she did. But she couldn't bring herself to.
Taz was undoubtedly one of the kindest men she'd ever met; at least to her anyway.
Maybe not to everyone else, but being one of the club’s most popular dancers had its perks.
The two ended up spending a lot of time together, as she performed almost every night. And Taz preferred conducting his business at the burlesque club to anywhere else.
He knew it was safe, and there were back rooms disguised as extra dressing rooms he used when business had to get a little messy.
Y/N knew it wasn't the most conventional dream to have, but she had wanted to be a burlesque dancer for years.
When Taz bought the business from the previous owner, Y/N watched as many of her coworkers left when they realized who their new owner really was.
She knew she probably should have gone with them, but she just wasn't willing to give up on her job.
She loved the club so much; she couldn't imagine working anywhere else.
And it may have also had a tiny bit to do with Taz's handsome son.
Y/N and Hook both remembered the first night they met vividly, and they knew they wouldn't be forgetting anytime soon.
Hook was sitting in a private booth in the corner next to his dad at the burlesque club.
Taz had bought it a few months ago, but he hadn't bothered to come by until tonight.
His dad was dealing with a customer who had put his hands on one of the dancers here, and wanted his men there to help him 'take care' of the problem.
Say what you wanted about Taz, but he and his people did not take that lightly.
The man showed up every Friday night, so they watched the performance while waiting for him to show his face.
Hook was itching for him to show up, ready to beat the disrespect out of the man's body.
But his mind was pulled away from the soon-to-come beat down when a song he vaguely recognized started playing.
It was an older song, but he couldn't quite put his finger on the name.
But when the curtains reopen, Taz laughs when he sees his son's eyes widen and he inhales sharply.
"That's Y/N" Taz informs with a smirk. "She's the most popular dancer here"
"She.. she's gorgeous" Hook mumbles.
Taz laughs and claps Hook on the shoulder. "Don't go getting too distracted, we have business to take care of tonight"
Hook clears his throat and nods, but his eyes quickly trail back to the woman on the stage.
His eyes scanned up and down her body as she sensuously moved across the stage, and her melodic voice floated around the room.
He was so enthralled by her that he didn't even notice when his father's men started shifting around the room.
It wasn't until Taz nudged his side that he snapped out of the trance Y/N had lulled him into.
Later that night, Y/N was sitting at the bar with a drink in her hand.
Her eyes stayed on the stage, watching her friends perform with a smile across her red lips.
"I recognized the first song you sang"
She spins around in her seat, and smiles at the handsome man who had spoken to her. "Yeah? Did you like it?"
"Mhm" he nods, and slides into the empty seat next to her. "But I can't remember the name of it"
"A guy what takes his time. Originally sung by Mae West" Y/N informs.
"You a big fan of her?" Hook asks.
"Very much so" Y/N replies with a grin. "She's such an icon"
"I have to admit, I'm unsure of who she is" Hook says with a sheepish grin.
"She's only one of the most famous sex symbols ever" Y/N says with a giggle. "She even was the first to say the quote 'Why don't you come up sometime and see me?' Rather scandalous for 1933"
"Extremely" Hook concurs with a chuckle, before sticking his hand out. "I'm Hook, but you can call me Tyler"
Y/N was caught off guard by that. Of course she knew who Hook was, but she had heard how he didn't let many people call him Tyler. She even heard a few stories of him beating people up who disrespected him by calling him his real name.
But weirdly, it caused butterflies in her stomach. She placed her hand into his and sent him a sweet smile. "I'm Y/N"
"It's a pleasure to meet you amore" He lifts her hand to place a kiss on her knuckles, and that combined with the Italian nickname had a bright blush flushing Y/N's cheeks.
"So" Y/N clears her throat before her face changes to a serious expression. "Is the problem taken care of?"
"What are you talking about?" Hook plays dumb, and if she wasn't already in the know she probably would have fallen for his charming smile.
"You know what I'm talking about" Y/N stares directly into his eyes, annoyance creeping into her gaze. "He comes here every Friday, and all the girls are scared. Taz told me it would be taken care of tonight. Was it not?"
Hook stares at her for a second, unsure of what to say. He couldn't believe she knew. Furthermore, he couldn't believe his dad was the one to tell her. And even further, why did she seem so fine with it?
Taz, who had been behind the bar checking inventory and eavesdropping on the two, decides to walk over and help his seemingly frozen son. "Good evening miele"
Y/N smiles at Taz, and leans over the bar to kiss his cheek. "Hello Taz. I was just asking Hook if the problem was dealt with, but for some reason he seems to be unable to answer me"
Taz chuckles. "Don't worry about him, he's not used to talking to such a vision. He was dealt with earlier tonight, during your performance actually"
Y/N chuckles. "Good"
"It's getting late, and you spend enough time in this club as is. Tyler, why don't you take Y/N home?" Taz proposes.
"No, that's okay. I don't want to impose" Y/N immediately replies.
"I don't mind at all" Hook finally speaks up. "I'd love to give you a ride"
"Then it's settled. Because there's no way I'm letting you walk home this late" Taz says sternly.
Y/N just smiles. "How'd you know I was walking today?"
"It's my job to be observant Y/N. And I heard you complaining about your car not starting" Taz answers. "So until that's fixed, you are getting a ride from someone. It's not safe to walk around here"
"Alright, just give me a few minutes to get my stuff" Y/N gives in. She stands from her seat and smiles up at Hook.
"Thanks Hoo.. Tyler" she corrects herself, and gives his arm a light squeeze as she walks by him.
Taz smirks over at his son, who is looking down at the bar in an attempt to hide his red cheeks. "Tyler? You just met her and she's already allowed to call you Tyler?"
Hook doesn't answer, which causes Taz to laugh.
"You know, she's a good girl. I think you would be good together" Taz says. 
"Really?" Hook asks softly, looking up at his dad.
"Mhm" Taz hums. "But she's not like those other girls you go out with. You can't flash her a smile and she immediately agrees to go out with you. You're gonna have to put some work in. And it better be good, or I won't let you"
Hook chuckles. "You're not gonna let me?"
"No" Taz immediately answers firmly.
Then Y/N walks out with her bag. "I'm ready to go"
Taz walks out from behind the bar and gives her a hug. "Have a good night Y/N"
"You too Taz" she smiles as they pull away.
Hook walks over and takes her bag from her.
"Thanks" she says, and Hook just nods before placing his hand on the small of her back to guide her out of the building.
That next morning Y/N woke up to a surprise.
Y/N furrows her eyebrows, and stops making her coffee when she hears noise coming from her driveway.
She quickly grabs a jacket before walking outside to see what was going on.
But a smile spreads across her lips when she sees Hook in her driveway messing with her car. "Good morning handsome"
He looks up and flashes her a sheepish smile with red cheeks from her compliment. "Did I wake you?"
"No, I was already up" She answers. "What are you doing?"
"Fixing your car" he says with a proud grin. "I already figured out what's wrong with it. The battery's dead"
"Is that bad?" Y/N asks, not knowing much about cars.
Hook shakes his head. "It's an easy fix. I'm gonna jump-start it and it should be good as new"
"Well, thank you so much" Y/N smiles. "You didn't have to do all this, but I really appreciate it"
"It's not a problem" Hook brushes it off. "I'm glad to help"
"Come inside when you're done. I’ll make breakfast"
And she did. The two talked and laughed the entire time.
It started becoming a routine for them to have breakfast together.
At first, Hook left after breakfast. But then he started staying a little later. Then he started staying for lunch too. And by the time he stayed for lunch, he may as well have stayed long enough to drive her to the club for her shift, right?
Taz couldn't be more excited watching the two of them walk in together every night, including tonight.
As usual, they walked in right at 5:00, making the most of every minute.
"One of these days you're gonna get here at 5:01, and you're gonna be the one in trouble Tyler" Taz jokes, making the two laugh.
"Don't worry Taz, I'll make sure I'm always here on time. I can't let my favorite Senerchia down" she laughs, and walks over to pat his arm.
Hook pouts, but his lips turn up when she pecks his cheek as she passes him on the way to the dressing rooms.
"How's it going son?" Taz asks once Y/N’s out of sight.
"I think it's going good" Hook answers. "I can tell she's hesitant though"
Taz nods. "Just be patient. She's used to men playing her, just keep showing her you aren't like that"
Later that night Hook was sitting in a booth with his best friend, Jack Perry.
He was standing up and applauding as Y/N left the stage, but not before blowing a kiss towards him.
He pretends to catch it before sitting back down next to a snickering Jack. "What?"
"Nothing" Jack raises his hands in surrender. "I can just tell that you really like her"
"Yeah" Hook mumbles. "But I don't know if she likes me like that"
"You told me you spend time together everyday" Jack replies.
"We do" Hook shrugs. "But whenever I try to kiss her or hold her hand, she always pulls away"
"She's probably just nervous bro" Jack pats Hook's shoulder. "I mean, with her job, she's probably had to deal with a lot of scumbags"
Hook nods. "I know. My dad said the same thing"
But before either of them can say anything else Skye, one of the other dancers, walks over to the table. "Hey Hook. I'm sorry to bother you, but there’s this guy at the bar messing with Y/N. He won't leave her alone, and she said she could handle it, but he's not stopping"
Hook immediately stands up, and scans the bar.
He spots Y/N almost immediately, and the guy next to her who is way too close for his liking.
"Thanks" he says gruffly to Skye before taking off towards Y/N, Jack following close behind.
Hook walks over, and places himself in the space between them. "Hey amore"
He can see the relief on her face as he gently pushes her to stand behind him. "Hi Ty"
She holds onto his arm as Hook stares the guy down.
"Excuse me, we were talking" the guy rudely says, clearly not knowing who he was dealing with.
"It's best if you'd leave man" Jack says from his place next to Hook in an attempt to diffuse the situation.
Y/N knew that if looks could kill, that man would already be six feet under from the glare Hook was sending him. So she pulls on his arm, indicating she wants to leave. And he almost does, until the guy opens his mouth again.
"I just said we were talking" The guy repeats.
"You were talking" Hook snaps, pulling away from Y/N to step closer to him. "She wasn't"
"Oh yeah?" The guy stands up, making both Jack and Hook tense up, clearly ready for a fight.
"You got a fucking problem?" Hook demands.
"Ty, Ty let's just go" Y/N says, grabbing onto his arm again. "Please?"
"Yeah, just go" the guy taunts, and Y/N's eyes widen when he pushes Hook.
Chaos happens so quickly after that. Hook immediately pushes him back, and then his fist connects with the guy's jaw.
Jack joins in, and holds the guy still while Hook rains punches down on him.
"Tyler! Tyler stop!" Y/N yells as the bouncers run over and pull the three men apart.
Y/N latches onto Hook's arm as the bouncers drag the guy out.
"Are you two okay?!" She exclaims, quickly scanning them for injuries.
"I'm all good" Jack says. "I'm gonna head out, that was enough excitement for me for one night"
But as Hook wrapped his arms around Y/N to comfort her, he didn't realize what was going through Jack's head. Unbeknownst to Hook, he had just revealed to Jack his weak point.
Y/N headed to work later than normal a few days later. She wasn't supposed to work that day, but Skye was sick and Y/N offered to take her shift.
Hook had some business his father needed him to deal with, so he wasn't there to drive her.
Y/N was headed into the club when it happened.
All of a sudden she was grabbed from behind. She kicked and screamed as loud as she could as the men attempted to drag her into the trunk of their car.
She managed to scratch the hand of the one holding her mouth, causing him to let out a pained yell and loosen his grip.
And with her mouth free she screamed for help; she screamed for Hook.
Anthony, who was one of Hook's friends and Taz's men, heard a scream from his place at the door and ran outside.
Once the men saw Anthony running towards them with his gun out, they dropped Y/N and scrambled to get back in the car.
Y/N let out a yell when she fell onto the pavement and hit her head.
She was in a daze as she just laid there on the ground, watching as the car sped off and blood landed on the ground, dripping from her head.
Anthony kneeled next to her and pulled her into his arms. "Y/N? Hey, you're okay now. I got you"
She curled into his chest as he pulled his phone out and called Taz.
Less than ten seconds later every one of Taz's men in the club came running out with instructions to find the people who did this.
Then Taz himself ran over and kneeled next to them. "Hey hon"
"Hi Taz" she mumbles, sending him a weak smile in an attempt to assure him that she was okay.
He smiled back and brushed some hair out of her face. "You're gonna be just fine miele"
Anthony picks her up and carries her to Taz's car. He lays her down in the backseat before sliding in next to her.
Y/N was still a bit in and out as Anthony pressed a cloth against her bleeding head, but she heard Taz call Hook.
"Son, something's happened at the club"
"What do you mean? Are you and Y/N okay?" Hook asks urgently.
"Yes, we're all alright. But Y/N was hurt, son"
It was silent for a moment, but Y/N heard when Hook's breathing started getting heavier. "What happened?"
Y/N knew that tone. It was calm, too calm. She knew that he was furious, and it worried her that he would go out and try to find the people.
"I want you to come to the house before I tell you all the details"
"Why?!" Hook immediately snaps.
"Because I know you son" Taz replies firmly. "And the minute I give you any details you're going to go out and try to do something"
"Of course I am! Someone hurt Y/N! I am gonna hunt them dow-“
"I am not telling you a damn thing until you're at the house and that's final. Y/N will be there" Taz says with finality before hanging up the phone.
When Taz pulled into the driveway, Y/N was surprised. "You brought me to your house? I thought only the inside circle knows where you live"
But Taz just turns to smile at her. "That's right"
Y/N smiles after that, before sitting up with Anthony's help.
"Don't get ahead of yourself Y/N" Anthony says.
She just nods, and lets him pick her back up and carry her inside.
"Lay her down in the living room, I've got the doctor coming over" Taz tells Anthony, who nods and does as told.
Y/N thanks Anthony after he sits her on the couch, and he smiles and nods in return.
She looks around the room, and her eyes stop on a picture perched on the mantle. It was Hook and his dad when Hook was little. A smile grew on her lips as she stared at the photo.
"I love that picture too" Taz says as he walks into the room with a cup of water.
She thanks him for it as he sits down next to her.
"He hasn't been that carefree in a long time. I suppose that's my fault. Dragging him into this life" Taz sighs.
"No, I don't think it's your fault. He's told me how much he wants to be a part of it. I don't think you could have done anything to stop him" Y/N replies with a sympathetic smile.
Taz nods. "Thanks, hon"
It's then the door swings open and hurried footsteps echo through the house. "Y/N?!"
Y/N winces at his loud yell, and Taz stands up to meet Hook in the doorway. "Hey, her head is still hurting. No yelling, and be gentle with her"
Hook frantically nods before running over to her.
He kneeled in front of her and cupped her face between his warm hands.
Y/N leaned into his palm and closed her eyes. "I'm okay. Don't worry"
"You're not okay" Hook breathes out. "You don't have to lie"
"I'm okay now" she insists. "You're here now. I know nothing can happen to me"
Hook's lips turn upwards slightly, before he reaches up to pull her into a hug. "I was so worried"
"Don't be. I'm tough" Y/N replies.
Hook pulls away to press his forehead against hers. "Yes you are. My strong girl"
The two smile at each other, and sit like that for a moment. Hook was so thankful to be able to sit there and listen to her breathing while holding tightly onto her hands, reassuring him that she was okay.
Then Taz walks in with the doctor.
Hook sat next to her as the doctor cleaned up her cuts, and held her hand the entire time.
Meanwhile, out in the hallway, Taz was talking to his right-hand man; Tony Schiavone.
"I wanna find the people who did this" Taz says in a dangerous tone. "I want them found and brought to me; alive. Understood?"
"Yes" Schiavone nods. "Out of curiosity, what do you plan to do to them?"
Taz just smirks. "I think I'll let Tyler decide that"
Y/N woke up the next morning with a very sore body.
Every time she moved pain shot through her, and she had a terrible headache.
She slowly pulled herself into a sitting position, and took a second to brace herself before sliding off of the bed.
She looked to the bedside table for her phone, and smiles when she sees more than just the phone. There was medicine, a cup of water, a little bag of her favorite chips, and one of Hook's hoodies folded up.
She reached over and slipped on the hoodie, taking a moment to savor the smell of Hook's cologne that now swirled around her, before taking the medicine. Then she got out from under the extremely cozy blankets and left the bedroom.
She went to the bathroom and brushed her teeth and hair before venturing out into the hallways.
She felt a little awkward making her way around the Senerchia house- well, more like mansion. She was a guest and didn't know her way around very well, but she was really hungry.
She let out a quiet cheer when she found the kitchen, and walked over to the fridge and pantry to see what they had. Y/N pulled out the ingredients to make pancakes, bacon, and eggs. She knew Hook would probably freak out over her cooking after just being injured, but she wanted to do something nice for them.
For absolutely no reason, the Senerchia's had taken her in and accepted her as family. Taz had done so long before she ever even met Hook.
Many people would be angry that they had been attacked because of the Senerchia family, but Y/N wasn't. She knew the lifestyle they lived, and she made a choice to be in their lives anyway. She just wished Hook realized that too. Y/N knew Hook would beat himself up about it for months to come.
As everything was cooking, Y/N was trying to figure out how their coffee machine worked. But she was stumped.
"Something smells amazing" she turns around and smiles when Taz walks into the kitchen.
"Thank you. I hope you don't mind, I just wanted to do something nice for y'all" Y/N says.
"I appreciate it" Taz smiles back.
"I was trying to make you guys coffee too, but I can't figure out this machine" she laughs, making Taz laugh too.
"You've done more than enough this morning" Taz walks over to the pot and takes it from her hands. "Let me make the coffee at least"
"What a great team we make" Y/N grins, before heading back over to the stove.
"I assume you're feeling better this morning?" Taz asks.
"I don't feel great, but definitely better than last night" Y/N answers. "Got a splitting headache though"
"That'll clear up in a few days" Taz comforts.
Y/N nods. "Thank you for taking care of me last night"
"Hey, you're one of us now" Taz says. "You will be protected from here until forever"
Y/N couldn’t stop the bright smile that took over her face, until the next words that come from Taz. "Unless you decide you don't wanna be part of this life of course"
"What are you talking about?" Y/N immediately asks.
"I'm not gonna lie to you Y/N, most people don't make it long-term in this world. The danger, the not knowing if someone will make it back home, the threat of the cops, it's not an easy life to live. And I know Tyler hasn't asked you to officially be his girl yet, but I know he wants to. And when he does, I just want to make sure you know that you have options. This incident.. I can't guarantee it, or something worse, won't happen again. I wish I could but I can't. You know we're gonna do everything we can to make sure no one lays a pinky finger on you ever again, but.. if it all becomes too much for you, I need you to know that I can get you out. I can send you away, somewhere even Tyler won't know. You can get a fresh start away from all of this"
Y/N stares at Taz for a moment, letting his words settle, before she smiles softly. "Thank you so much Taz, but I won't be needing any of that. Ever. I'm here for the long haul as long as Tyler will have me"
Taz just smiles back, incredibly happy to have Y/N as a part of their family.
Now all he needed was for Hook to man up and confess his feelings to Y/N.
Taz knew he was scared; scared of the danger it would put Y/N in. But it seemed that the danger was already present. And seeing it first hand had shaken Hook. The original plan that night was for Hook to finally ask Y/N to be his girl. They told Y/N that Hook had something Taz needed him to do; when really he was out getting some gifts for her. He had dinner reservations at her favorite restaurant, and he was going to pick her up from the club early and take her out. But of course, the night did not end the way Hook had hoped.
Then Hook walks into the kitchen, and his eyes widen when he sees Y/N cooking. "Y/N! You don't need to be cooking, you need to be resting!"
Y/N just laughs as he puts his hands on her arms and guides her to sit down at the kitchen island. "I'm feeling okay Ty"
"No, you need to rest amore" Hook says, and leans down to kiss her on the forehead before taking her place at the stove.
Jack sighed from his seat at the burlesque club.
He watched as Y/N performed, the gears in his head turning rapidly.
His plan to kidnap her had failed, and he was actually kind of glad about it.
He had realized since that night a few things. And the biggest one was that Y/N is fiercely loyal to Hook and his family. Even after almost getting abducted she stuck by his side, perhaps closer than ever.
He realized if his plan had worked, she wouldn't have told him shit about Taz's operations.
Jack couldn't ask Hook; they were friends, but he'd realize what was up if Jack started poking around.
But anyone who was an enemy of the Senerchia may kidnap Hook's girl to try and get information to take them down.
But Y/N wouldn't crack, Jack was now sure of it.
So he decided on a new plan:
Psychological warfare.
He didn't need to take Y/N from Hook, he was gonna make her want to leave.
216 notes · View notes
gunwookies · 1 year
Text
cute things zb1 does in a relationship
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pairing: zb1 x gn! reader genre: fluff! suggestive at hao's, lil angsty at taerae's warnings: slightly cringey word count: 3.5k notes: I tried to write every character based on my interpretation of the members! also for yujin's I assumed the reader goes to school since he does too.
jiwoong:
he always makes sure that you are well fed!
jiwoong always asks you if you’ve eaten. just like he cares so much about his health, he cares so much about your health! when you’re stressed you often forget to eat so he’s the one that always makes sure your tummy is full! he lovesss to cook for you! when you come home from work tired, he knows that food is the way to your heart. so he always welcomes you home with a plate of rice or a bowl of soup ready to listen to you talk about your day. if you’re too tired he’ll even feed you because he finds you so cute.
you unlock your apartment door, trudging through. your nose is hit with the strong smell of garlic and chili oil. your eyes find their way towards the kitchen, where jiwoong’s back is facing you as he spoons some bibimbap into a porcelain bowl.
“you’re home?” jiwoong asks, his back still facing you as he finishes preparing the food. you smile to yourself as his voice gives you the comfort you’d been longing for all day. you drop your bags on the couch as you head towards the kitchen. you wrap your arms around jiwoong’s waist, snuggling your cheek into his back. you feel jiwoong slightly giggle and look up to see the cute crinkle of his eyes. “are you tired?” he asked, looking down at you over his shoulder.
 “mhm,” you affirmed. he turned around to face you, your arms still around his waist. his hands reached your face, fingers cupping your cheeks as he placed a small peck on your forehead. his fingers lightly caress your ears as he places his forehead against yours.
“how about you have some of this bibimbap i made you and then we can watch a movie and cuddle? yeah?” he whispers. you nodded enthusiastically before stealing a quick peck on his lips.
zhang hao:
constantly praises and compliments you
hao is your number one fan and he always wants you to remember that. he literally cannot go an hour without praising you. he’ll randomly stop you when you’re walking together down the street to just tell you how beautiful you look. as soon as you wake up next to him, hair all messy and face puffy, he doesn’t hesitate to tell you how attractive you are as he looks straight into your eyes. he loves seeing how shy you get at his words, but even more how you gain confidence when you are around him. he definitely feels pride from having such an amazing partner as you.
you wrapped a towel around your body as you stepped out of the shower. hao had booked a dinner reservation for the both of you as it was your three year anniversary. you were so excited as today was such a special day and you were ready to spend it with your boyfriend in such a romantic way. as you walked out of the bathroom, you saw hao leaning against the bedframe, scrolling on his phone. his gaze raised as he saw you from the corner of his eyes. a small smirk formed on his lips as his eyes were glued on your frame. he shoved his phone into his pocket as he walked towards you. you didn’t pay him any mind as you walked towards your closet, looking for something to wear. as you stood in front of your clothes, you felt hao’s arms snake around your waist. 
“you look so beautiful, right now,” he whispered, placing a small kiss on your neck. he continued to place kisses all across your neck and shoulders.
“come on, hao. i need to get dressed.”
“but you just look so gorgeous like this. i can’t believe i get to see this beauty with my own two eyes,” he whispers into your ear, before he places a kiss there. you turn around, hiding your blushing face into his neck. 
“we’re gonna be late.”
“ i think we should just stay home and do… other things,” he smiled innocently. and of course, you could only agree.
hanbin:
loves to spoil you
hanbin just loves to see you happy, especially when he’s the reason. and he’ll do anything to achieve that. he always notices the twinkle in your eyes when you see something you want. he doesn’t even think twice about buying it for you, because he just want to see you happy like that. you never even ask for anything but hanbin just always knows exactly what you want. even just going to the convenience store, he always brings something for you. even when you don’t ask for anything. more than anything, he loves giving you meaningful gifts. like how he once gifted you a weighted blanket because you complained that you weren’t sleeping well. 
you rushed down the stairs of your apartment, still in your pjs. hanbin had texted you that he was outside of your apartment. you were completely confused as you had just seen each other for breakfast this morning. but it was still an opportunity to see your favorite person, so you were delighted. as you walked outside in the windy cold, you noticed hanbin leaning against a tree. he broke into a sweet smile as his eyes met yours. you walked towards him and noticed his hands hidden behind his back. 
“hey, love,” he smiled as you reached him. you waddled in front of him, placing a peck on his lips. you noticed how his arms didn’t even reach to touch you as you kissed him. you looked down to see he was holding something in his hands. hanbin noticed your gaze and hesitantly stretched his arms towards you. flowers. he bought you a bouquet of flowers. you broke into a smile, noticing how they were your favorite flowers, camelia flowers. 
“what is this for?” you asked, as you grabbed the bouquet, placing it against your chest.
“i just saw them as i was walking home and i had to get them for you. pretty flowers for such a pretty person,” he said, smiling shyly, his ears growing red. you giggled, leaning into his embrace. 
“thank you, hanbinnie,” you muttered, kissing his cheek.
matthew:
he loves taking pictures of you
matthew just loves admiring your beauty. anytime he can, he just takes out his phone and snaps a picture of you. he especially loves doing it in secret. whenever he wakes up before you in the morning, he loves to sneak pictures of you sleeping because you just look so peaceful and beautiful. he even has a picture album named after you where he just has pictures of you. whenever you guys go on dates he always makes sure to take a picture of you, wether it be from across the table or in front of a beautiful scenery. whenever you’re not with him, he’ll go through the photo album and smile at the beauty. 
you walked hand-in-hand with your boyfriend over a bridge that overlooked the han river. 
“aw, come on! i was not that awkward,” matthew whined as he recalled the day he confessed to you.
“matthew, you were stuttering and you couldn’t even look me in the eyes,” you giggled, leaning your head on his shoulder. it was true, you had never seen matthew look so nervous until that day three years ago. 
“okay, i definitely was nervous. but, you can’t blame me. i liked you so much that i probably wouldn’t have been able to live with myself if you rejected me.” you giggled, pinching his cheek. you settled back into comfortable silence as your eyes wandered around your surroundings.
“the river looks so beautiful with all the lights reflecting on it like that,” you noticed, stopping to stare. 
“it really does look beautiful. here, go stand there. let me take a picture,” mathew says, taking out his phone. you walked over towards the edge of the bridge, standing awkwardly in front. you didn’t really know what to do so you just threw up a peace sign as you always did. “come on, y/n. you can do better than that,” matthew says. “you should look at my instagram for inspo,” he grinned behind the camera. you giggled, before throwing your hands back into the peace signs. what you didn’t know is that matthew was able to capture that beautiful smile of yours. “you look so cute!” he praised as he looked at the pictures he took. 
taerae:
takes care of you even when he’s mad at you
you’re taerae’s number one moodmaker. so when you fight, it really hurts him. because of that he tends to give you the silent treatment. if he tries to talk to you he knows he’ll break down into tears so he just waits for you to come up to him. but, you can be just as stubborn as him so this could mean whole days without talking. however, taerae feels responsible for taking care of you anyways, so he does so in small and quiet ways, like leaving you coffee in the morning when you wake up, throwing a blanket over you and turning the tv off when you fall asleep on the couch, or folding your laundry just the way you like it without asking, which usually cause you to give in and forgive him. 
you had locked yourself in your room for hours, silently crying in your bed as you replayed the scene over in your head. you had never fought so bad with taerae and it was all for nothing. it was stupid. you hated fighting with him. why’d he have to overwork himself so much? why couldn’t he just come home and rest with you? it wasn’t fair that his agency was taking your boyfriend away from you. but it was also his dream, and you couldn’t take that away from him. you just wanted to run into his arms and hug him and tell him everything was okay. but then the scenes of him yelling at you, eyebrows furrowed replayed in your head. you were too stubborn to forgive him so easily. suddenly, you heard a knock at the door. you jolted in your bed, standing up to head to the door. you hesitated before opening it, as you weren’t sure if you wanted to face taerae like this. however, you wiped your tears and opened the door. to your surprise, there was no one there. but you looked down and noticed a cup of tea on the floor.  as you picked it up, you noticed there was a note stuck to it. 
“i love you no matter what. i’m sorry - taerae”
ricky:
he loves to make you nervous
ricky is such a naturally flirty guy, but only with you. so, he just loves doing little things that he knows will make your heart flutter. you’re usually pretty shy when it comes to physical affection, so ricky loves to catch you off-guard. he loves to see the way your breath hitches and your eyes panic when he does something risky. he doesn’t care if you’re alone or surrounded by people. but secretly, it affects ricky just as much as it does to you. he would never want you to know how fast his heart beats or how his hands shake, when he does these kinds of things.
“hahah loser! i’ve beaten you three times now,” you say as you stick out your tongue at your boyfriend. ricky pouted as he threw the game controller onto the bed. 
“it’s just because you’re distracting me!” he whined, throwing himself back on the bed. you shook your head in disbelief.
“what do you mean? i’m just playing mario kart fair and square! i haven’t even talked to you!” you mirrored ricky’s pout, crossing you arms against your chest. 
“yeah, well you’re so cute i can’t focus,” he mutters. your breath hitched just the slightest.
“ricky… th-this is just your way of sidetracking me so i’ll lose. guess what? it won’t work!” ricky chuckled, sitting back up as he gripped the game controller.
“we’ll see about that? if i win this next round, you owe me ice cream,” he proposed. 
“deal. you won’t win though,” you affirmed. this time you were completely determined to beat ricky, this was ice cream on the line. as the game started, your eyes were focused on the screen. you were pleased to realize you were beating ricky! though he was only two places behind you, you were sure that you could beat him. that was until an overwhelming force pushed your back into the bed. less than a second later, a pair of lips attacked yours. they moved swiftly against yours, his tongue lightly licking your lips. you could feel your heart beating a thousand miles per hour. without realizing it, you became completely captivated and forgot all about the game. but, ricky didn’t. just as quickly as he kissed you, he parted from you, getting back into the game. and before you knew it, he had won.
“RICKY!” you whined, lightly punching his bicep. 
“you were totally into it,” he smirked. “and you owe me ice cream.”
gyuvin:
he’s literally attached to your hip
apart from being your boyfriend, gyuvin is your bestfriend. that’s why he wants to do absolutely everything with you. he also thinks you’re literally the cutest person on earth, so he tends to baby you. no matter what you’re doing, gyuvin either has an arm around you, his hand in yours, caressing your face, your hair. there is absolutely no scenario in which gyuvin isn’t touching you in some way. and you’ve become absolutely dependant on his touch, to the point where you’ve become just as needy for his touch. 
you were laying on the couch of your shared apartment, gyuvin’s head laying on your lap. your fingers played with his hair, gently ruffling it as your eyes stay stuck on the tv screen. suddenly, you felt a storm in your stomach. gyuvin turned his head to look at you, the corner of his lips pointing upwards. 
“are you hungry?” he asked, a cute downward smile on his lips. you nodded slowly, a shy smile on your lips. gyuvin then got up, sitting down next to you. 
“how about we go down to the convenience store and get some ramen and snacks?” he suggested, a mischievous smile on his lips. 
“you go. i don’t wanna get up,” you whined, leaning against his shoulder.
“come on! you know i can’t do anything without you. plus, you’ll have so much more fun with me than alone here with your tv,” he grinned, standing up in front of you.
“alright, kim kwaja. let’s go,” you sighed, giving him your hand to pull you up. 
you walked along the street, your arm locked in gyuvin’s. 
“i’m so cold,” you grumbled, snuggling into gyuvin’s chest. “i should’ve just stayed inside.” gyuvin giggled at how cute you looked, all grumpy and annoyed. he took your hands in his, warming them up with friction and placing a kiss on the back of your hands before putting them in his pocket. your cheeks heated up at the sweet act. 
“better?” his voice asked, lovingly.
“yeah,” you muttered, cheesing to yourself. 
“see. how can you live without me?” 
gunwook:
he gets jealous
gunwook’s biggest pride is you. so when he feels like that is being challenged, he tends to get a little irritated. however, he never makes it your problem because he understands that you’re such a charming person that it’s only natural for others to flirt with you. that doesn’t stop him from feeling a little jealous on the inside, though. he’s not usually a confrontational guy, gunwook is such a cutie, especially for you. but when he feels threatened, he tends to puff up his chest and pretend he’s all cool and mighty. you think its the cutest thing in the world. 
gunwook had taken you on a date to the amusement park. you’d been nagging gunwook for forever to go and he’d finally complied.  after going on all the rides you wanted to go to at least three times, you were both so tired. 
“how about we go get something to eat?” gunwook offered, squeezing your hand in his. you nodded enthusiastically. 
“how about we get some churros? ooh, and a milkshake?” you you asked, giving gunwook those puppy eyes that always worked on him. 
“yeah, yeah, alright. let’s go,” he said, melting completely. 
“ooh!” you gasped as you saw a couple wearing matching headbands. gunwook noticed the way your eyes lit up and immediately knew. 
“ok, you go get the food and i’ll go get us some cute headbands,” he said with a low chuckle. you giggled, thanking him with a kiss on the cheek before heading to get the food.  as you approached the food booth, you noticed a familiar face. your childhood friend, jungwon, was standing in line. as soon as he saw you, his eyes lit up.
“y/n!” he yelled, waving you over. “it’s been so long,” he said as he embraced you in a hug. as you got your food, you engaged in a long and enthusiastic conversation with him.
when gunwook arrived, wearing pink bunny ears and holding another pair in his hand, he didn’t like the view. he didn’t like the way jungwon was looking at you, or the way he kept touching your shoulder when he talked to you. he sped up walking to you and surprised you by wrapping his arm around your waist. 
“oh! hi, gunwook. this is jungwon,” you said, smiling. 
“hi. i’m her boyfriend, gunwook. nice to meet you,” he said with an unusually deep voice, placing the bunny ears on your head before shaking jungwon’s hand without cracking a smile.
“well, nice to meet you too! i'll get going y/n. it was nice to see you,” jungwon said, giving you a pat on the shoulder before walking away. you smiled at him, then turned towards gunwook. 
“you didn’t have to scare him off like that,” you scolded him.
“i just didn’t like the way he was looking at you,” he pouted, wrapping his arms around your waist and hiding his face in your neck. 
“you’re just the cutest, aren’t you?” you whisper.
yujin
he’s always blowing up your phone
yujin will literally relate anything he sees to you. because of that he’s always sending you pictures of things that remind him of you, or tiktoks, or memes that will make you laugh. he just sees you in every little thing and wants you to know. when you get home from school, you go straight to your phone to watch all the tiktoks yujin’s sent you and one by one respond to them. he’s also the type of boyfriend that would call you in the middle of a school day. he’d be obsessed with you.
you were able to sneak into the bathroom during math class, since you knew he wouldn’t notice you were gone. you quickly entered the bathroom stall in the far left, and rang your boyfriend. he immediately picked up.
“hi,” he said, all giggly. your cheeks warmed at the sound of his voice. 
“hey yujinnie,” you replied, warmly. “how’s your day been?” 
“i haven’t seen your face yet, so not that good,” he complained. you laughed lightly, but enough to make yujin smile. “it’s not fair that i don’t get to see you laugh with my own two eyes right now.”
“don’t be so whiny, yujin. here, i’ll turn on my camera,” you gave in. you turned on your camera, your smiling face being the first thing yujin saw. he gasped.
“what is this golden light that’s blinding my eyes? is it a goddess? an angel? oh wait it’s just y/n’s beauty” he announced dramatically. you chuckled, shaking your head.
“hey! now you turn on your camera!” you whined.
“alright, alright,” he complied. instantly, his face filled the screen. you gawked at how beautiful he look under the horrible bathroom lighting. his hair slightly fluffy, and a few strands falling over his eyes. he looked so cute it made you mad. 
“you’re alright,” you shrugged. 
“after i just compared you to a goddess? just ‘alright’?” he frowned jokingly.
“okay! i guess you’re pretty handsome,” you mutter. 
“i’ll take it!”
“sooo, do you wanna go to the movies after school? there’s this really good horror movie i wanna watch!” you suggested.
“sounds good, i’ll meet you there at three? maybe we can grab something to eat beforehand.”
“okay. i’ll see you later!” you said, sending him a kiss through the screen. he grabbed it in the air, holding it against his heart. 
“see you later, y/n.” you thought you saw a semblance of pink on his cheeks before the call ended.
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