#we've had so much things centered around his ability with out ever really getting into the whys or hows or even whats

[karmicpunishment]

sometimes i forget that atsushi's healing ability isn't actually described as healing/regenerating injuries but as negating them

and then i stop and think about what that means and then oops its been two hours

[sardonic-the-writer]

𝐓𝐞𝐚𝐦 𝐅𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥 [+ 𝐆𝐚𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐥] 𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐎𝐮𝐭 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐇𝐚𝐝 𝐃𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐑𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐡 𝐎𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐖𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐈𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞

↳ includes: dean, sam, castiel, and gabriel

↳ warnings: none

↳ song: dance macabre—ghost

masterlist | commissions | carrd

𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐧

• When Dean first meets you in the middle of bumfuck nowhere on a hunt, he's not surprised that you know his name

• Afterall, he has brought on the apocalypse more than once, and the hunter community isn't exactly known for its ability for people to keep their mouths shut

• What does surprise him, though, is your knowledge on him as a person

• It's nothing creepy— the thought of someone knowing all about him in that way brings him back to where he first met Becky through Chuck, and the thought makes him shudder —but just enough to where it's obvious you've done some digging and people reading of your own

• "Brought back some pie with dinner; didn't know what you wanted so I got apple."

• "Careful handling this case, it's got some nasty demons. We don't want you diving head first into hell. Again."

• "No no, don't use that. It didn't work on that shape-shifter you ganked last year in Massachusetts, so it won't work on this one. Throw it out." You eventually say one night while looking in Baby's trunk for some ammo, and Dean finally turns to face you

• "How did you know that? How do you know any of these things?" He clears his throat, squinting. You shrug with a barely there smile

• "Who do you think cleans up your messes when you're done, Dean? And what can I say. Word gets around."

• It's a simple case of Dean's reputation preceding him. Although, as you discover, there's a lot more to the Winchester than just his precious car, a strange love for greasy food, and his ability to fight off a demon with his bare hands

• "You sure you aren't obsessed with me? Because its totally fine if you're obsessed. I mean, look at me." Dean asks you at one point while gesturing down at himself. He's leaning on his car door in what he probably thought was a sexy manner, watching as you lugged some equipment out to the vehicle. You manage to press your lips together just in time to hide your amused grin

• "Keep dreaming, man." You shake your head. "There's a difference between reading up on people, and stalking them."

• "So you admit it?" He grins misheviously, pushing himself off Baby. "That you've spent your spare time thinking about me?"

• "Sure. And those witnesses never mentioned you'd be this insufferable." You scoff light heartedly, even though thats exactly what some of them said, and leave it at that. But for the rest of the hunt Dean can't stop elbowing you in the ribs to make a playful remark; something that, strangely, you don't find yourself minding

𝐒𝐚𝐦

• Unlike his brother, Sam takes the information that you practically already knew him with a bit of embarrassment

• Sure, he had been (or was supposed to be) Lucifer's vessel, and sure he also had a habit of being at the center of everything world ending, but he never really conciders him anyone other than a hunter that just happens to get the worst cases

• So when you just offhandedly started dropping these facts about him, he's a little off put

• "How'd you know that?"

• "You're literally one of the most infamous hunters to ever exist, Sam. You tangle with angels. Most of us only ever get to meet a werewolf or two before a friend is organizing our funeral the week after."

• "Oh. Right"

• Gets a little curious after a while as to what you exactly know. It's not like he keeps a journal about his feelings that the public can read, and that this point he's just praying you haven't discovered Chuck's Supernatural series, so he'd probably ask you all of what you know and why you know it

• "So you're telling me you've done research on our hunting styles—" Sam asks you while leaning forward. You nod, so he continues. "—and all the people we've ever pissed off?"

• "Call it too much free time, which I certainly don't have enough of these days, but I knew if I ever ran into you two knuckle heads, and I knew it would happen eventually whether I wanted it to or not, then I would need to be prepared." You dragged a hand down your face and exhaled for a moment. "That meant making a checklist of every vamp, demon, or god you've ever had out for your head. And trust me, it's a lot."

• He's silent for a moment after you finish, but it doesn't take long for him to pipe up again

• "Can I see it?"

• Safe to say, after seeing the list, Sam started to rethink some of his past decisions

• "Seriously, how are we not dead yet??"

• "Buddy, I have no idea."

𝐂𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐥

• He does not understand why you seem to know so much about him. Not only as a person, but as an angel

• Castiel is used to the Winchester's asking questions. The first year of knowing them was filled with 'How Did You Do That''s and 'Can You Do This''s. He'd answer all of them, even if he found their questions to be on a kindergarten level most of the time, until eventually they had no more to ask

• You hadn't been like that. Castiel doesn't think he could ever recall you asking him things unless they were about hunts or special circumstances, like the time Sam lost his soul. Hell, you seemed to know more about him than some angels knew about themselves

• Grace knowledge, wing anatomy, biblical lore—you name it and Castiel's probably heard it come out of your mouth at some point

• He gets around to asking you about it one day, albeit very bluntly

• "You don't ask questions." Castiels voice sounds from behind you. You don't even bother to turn around; you heard his wings flutter the moment before he dropped in

• "What do you mean Cas?" You sucked some air between your teeth as you scribbled away at the papers before you. It was something Sam had asked you to follow up on, and you'd been at it for a hot minute now. Hopefully you could make this conversation quick so you could get back to it

• "About angels." A beat of silence. "About me."

• This time you do turn around in your seat to look at him. He's already studying you with that silent squint, and you resist the urge to mirror it

• "Why would I ask questions I already know the answers to?" You parry. The case papers lay on the table, forgotten by now. Your response gets you a rare, but endearing, Cas head tilt

• Upon further questioning, he finds out you'd spent a lot of your early hunting years doing nothing but reading up on anything remotely supernatural. Even calling them 'hunting years' was a stretch. You were more like a crazed researcher that never left the library than a hunter, even resorting to keep mountains upon mountains of notes on ancient lore stored away in the margins of dusty books

• "That's certainly explains why you weren't surprised when we met for the first time and I healed you." Cas's low voice drawled slowly after you gave him a moment to interject. "Or how you knew the symbol for sending us back to heaven before Dean or Sam ever did."

• "Like I said." You smiled to yourself, and Castiel got the feeling he was missing a part of the joke. "Lots of reading."

𝐆𝐚𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐥

• Do not bring up that you used to have an angel phase back in college. Under no circumstances should you reveal that. He will never let you live it down

• Especially if he finds out you used to study artwork and literature about him specifically

• It's all over the moment he finds your old school books. They're stuffed full of old crinkled pages with his name thrown in there. Of course, this was way back when the idea of angels being real was laughable to you and you still had dreams of graduating college, but that doesn't change to fact that the notes are there, and that Gabriel found them

• "Wait wait wait listen to this—" An old binder is clutched in the hands of a very amused and very heavenly being as he paces around your spot at a table. His eyes are skimming the pages as a speed quicker than light, and Gabriel's shit eating smile grows as he continues to read

• "The archangel Gabriel isn't depicted as much as his brothers Micheal or Lucifer in classic literature, but when he is, it is often as a symbol of great power and beauty—"

• "I'm going to kill you." You cut him off and groan with hot cheeks. Your hands had come up to cover your face a while ago in an attempt to keep what little dignity you had, but something told you it wasn't working

• "Glad to know you think I'm beautiful, sweet cheeks." Was all Gabriel said. You could hear the teasing lit in his voice. Sure enough, when you looked up to glare at him, he was already looking at you and wiggling his brows suggestively. It took you a total to three seconds to throw the closest thing at his head

• "Hey hey! Watch the beautiful goods!" He laughed while dodging a pencil. It his his chest anyway and bounced to the ground with a dull thud

• "Gabriel." Your tone was downright murderous

• "Okay, okay! I'll stop!"

• He does, in fact, not stop. Someone restrain him for the love of Chuck, for he is getting way too much enjoyment out of poking fun at you

• You're gonna have to avoid him for the next few weeks after that if you want to keep your embarassment levels to a minimum. No other way around it

• Let's just hope he never realizes you had to spend time in art class analyzing renaissance paintings of him in the nude. Now that would be the conversation to end all conversations

• "Heyyy, you never told me you had an art folder—"

• Oh shit.

[millilps]

fuck it, we ball clown

so. Susan. Susan Triad. it was all a set up to trap the Doctor. all the mentions of Susan (Foreman) were just to give context to the new viewers. but you know what's interesting here? family.

"wtf are you talking about are you high or something" no no bear with me I actually have a point it's not just pure clowning. well, it is, but I swear I'm trying my best here to make it make sense

it's a long post so buckle up clowns we're going all in with this one

so, I was saying, if you think about it a lot of episodes in this season are more or less centered around or connected to the idea of family in some way:

Space Babies: I mean. yeah. it doesn't really need an explanation. and also the whole thing of being abandoned just like Ruby

The Devil's Chord: we know Maestro is part of the Toymaker's family, and technically also the kid we see at the start? I think? are there theories about that kid? is he just a normal kid and then became somehow the harbinger of Maestro?

Boom: the concept of family literally saves everyone

73 Yards: well, Ruby's family is present in the episode, but also it's interesting how Ruby's fears play out in the episode which is directly interlocked with her birth mother abandoning her, it's kinda there but not as central or as explored as other episodes

Dot and Bubble: it's... a bit more subtle. it's there, kinda. we do have the whole thing of all the people in Finetime being part of rich families, and we also see Lindy's mom, so it's better than nothing

Rogue: I actually don't know. the family of Chuldurs? the marriage proposal? I have absolutely no idea but I also feel like it's there somewhere

The Legend of Ruby Sunday/Empire of Death: I probably don't have to say much as they are the episodes that actually dive in Ruby's story and the mystery around her birth, but yeah the family theme is obviously there

with the season following this theme, more or less, Susan was an obvious choice.

think about it: the Doctor has lost so many people he cared about that Sutekh pretty much could use every name ever. obviously they also had to explain regeneration to new viewers (hi, new viewers! hope you're enjoying the show!) so the list had to be shortened to only characters who are time lords or have the ability to regenerate, add a bit of "the Doctor regretting his past choices" and you get Susan. and this is tied directly with the theme of family, because she is the Doctor's family, technically the only gallifreyan family member we know about (Jenny, River, the Ponds and probably more that I'm forgetting/don't know about are also family, but in a different way) and also we have no informations whatsoever about her - sure, we have Big Finish, but it's kinda... not exactly canon, I guess? idk. nothing is canon and everything is canon at the same time in this show, you just have to live with it. still, she's one of the biggest mysteries of this show, because while other characters came back or were mentioned with information about them and/or their lives either in the expanded universe that is more strongly influenced by the show (yes I'm looking at Barbara and Ian's wedding in the 50th anniversary DMW that I can't find anywhere, idc what anyone says but that IS canon) or in the actual show at some point, she has never officially returned, and the Doctor has never officially gone back to meet her (sure, we have the story Fellow Traveller in the book Adventures in Lockdown, but it's probably not canon anymore at this point - although, it could be, if we clown enough). and with all the things about family in the season, obviously she had to be the key.

Ruby's family story is concluded: she found her birth mother, she also found her father, and now she has an amazing big loving family. but you know which one isn't? the Doctor's. we've met his adoptive mother, sure, but we know the Doctor had kids, we know Susan exists, and we know she's family to him.

she's out there somewhere. I know. she must be. she could've been mentioned in a lot of different episodes, a lot of different points, a lot of different stories, but she wasn't.

so why all these mentions all of a sudden? honestly I have absolutely no idea, I'm not RTD, I'm just a clown doing clown things, and the clown things on today's list is making theories about how Susan might come back

[booksandchainmail]

Pale 7.a

At first I thought this was going to be a Ulysse interlude, then I realized it's Kevin. Blech.

... I'd say it's interesting that the majority of interludes we've gotten have been from the points of view of antagonists, but I think that might just be a reflection of how few true allies the Kennet Trio has

Not much to say about this opening scene, just Kevin being exactly what I expected

By his gospel, the one we came to name Prometheus had peers, and it was not the one who tried to seize the original Fire, but many. All who tried, succeed or fail, were punished. I found my deity nine miles beneath the surface of the earth, thoroughly protected so none might disturb his eternal punishment. Had he succeeded, our campfires might not be wood we’ve set alight, but something else entirely.

oh that's sick as hell. I am now invested in Ulysse

Now he is my god and I am his sole worshiper, his champion.

"Sole worshiper of a god" is a great concept. (This is part of why I'm having such a good time with Pale Lights). I really like the blending of a normally-distant divine relationship with the closeness that comes from being the only one (and often the god taking a great deal of interest in and care of their worshiper's life). Also fun way to play around with faith and power dynamics, depending on how much ability the god retains and how seriously the worshiper takes the divinity aspect.

Other works that have this: Pale Lights, Thief's Covenant, The Thousand Eyes

 "Later, I met your god before you did. He burned me alive both times I ventured down there.  Others had claim over me.  In another lifetime, toward the end, we became friends.”

I also want to read this story

He shared an appreciation for things of value, and if Lawrence wasn’t keeping the company of fellow weirdos from the same families as these kids at this school, he would sometimes invite Kevin.

oh that is 100% manipulation

But over the years, little moments like that had stacked up.  And now… …Now he was a bit afraid of her.

I looked back at the girls' theories about Rae, and they ended up at personification of backlash? But that was just a guess

And it looks like Kevin isn't escaping the karma his eye generates... that could amplify whatever's up with Rae, once it finally explodes

Ted?  What was going on with Ted?  Was Alexander in communication with the man?

I'm not sure either: It could just be an effect of Ted being karmically blessed, and the librarian/school in general offering him what he needs

Clem was as stupid as I’ve ever seen her.  We’re not best friends anymore

oh good, that must be a relief for her

my online following is… it’s better than ever, frankly, but it’s taking more of my time to manage until all the fights and arguments die down.

I hope she's lying about that one

in the center of that table was a recreation of Sargent Hall, complete with mini-figures representing the occupants.

return of this thing! I guess Nicolette got it out from the fire ok

Ted — Kevin — Shellie — Rae Respective to their names were cards and numbers. 3, 7, 13, 19.

The dossier noted that Ted and Clem are around the same level of use, so it makes sense that he's number three. I wonder who is 1? Kevin being rated higher than Shellie seems like a reflection on how useful his eye is at dealing with mundane problems subtly (and how hard she is to control). Not sure what the ranking implies about Rae.

Noose in one corner, connecting to Ted, coin in the other, connecting to Shellie.

once again, same types of object as the awakening ritual. Coin is mostly fortune I think, woven object I'm less sure. Pact awakening ritual had it as dream and fate.

But he could read the notation.  ‘Noone will die at his girlfriend’s hand’.

get fucked!

“Nah, stark resemblance to an old crush,” he said. “Writing on the back says… Laila Throop. Was your old crush a Throop?”

no idea what's up with this, but it has to be important. Laila's been coming up a lot lately (Musette, and Fernanda's interlude). Her family specializes in curses: I could see them coming into contact with Kevin through that.

The works themselves are a trove of detail on people, especially those in the Maritime provinces and the major cities of Canada and the northeastern United States.

oh cool. So Alexander has compiled Ted's notes from other timelines. I wonder how long he's had them? Because this could explain a lot, if he's been able to draw on this knowledge for his plans all along. It would explain how he made those dossiers, for one.

... I wonder if there's anything on Kennet or the Carmine Beast in there. I don't think there'd be anything on the girls, since Ted's loop ended before they got involved, but things have been going on in the town for a while.

Courtesy of Raymond, the prompt is yet unfinished, but each pull from the coda of texts will help it improve.  For the time being it will do its best to list texts that may be relevant.

score one for the digital humanities

Alexander, I think, wanted us to find it because there may be traps here, not in the sense that a blade may jump out of nowhere, I don’t think, but the wrong information in the wrong person’s mind.

I can see Kevin setting off events by trying to preemptively defend himself from Rae, or this pushing him into demanding answers.

This was an arrangement of a court of judges in this region, who saw the danger and reached out to everyone in the area to ensure they had the power to set this into motion. 

oh! My first thought was the council the CB was on, but I looked at the dossiers again, and Ted's from Prince Edward Island, which is pretty far away, so probably not

I am a collector of people.  If you’ll take my help, I’ll point you to certain people.  But the moment you’re free, if it has anything to do with my help, I want your assistance after.

well fuck. I guess that explains why Ted works for Bristow now.

one student named Laila Throop was on the opposing side and had a really strong resemblance to someone from his past that he hated. “Her next.” He tapped her photograph

man Laila can just not catch a break... I wonder if this is what Musette saw?

[hexpea]

Ch. 14 - The Beginning of The End

The next day we were woken up by a terrifying rumbling and the sounds of screams in the street. I ran to the window to find civilians running for their lives. One of the owners of the place we stayed burst into the room, face pale as snow and pupils so small they looked non-existent.

"If you want to live, you need to get out of here," the man gasped and then quickly left to the next occupied room.

"What the fuck?" Zeke stood up, half-naked, putting his glasses on and squinting his eyes to the sunlight. He stomped over to the hallway to see if the man was still there. "Hey!" He shouted at him. "Could we have a little more context, please?"

"Titans!" The man screamed from a few doors down. "They're at the capital building!"

"Well then," Zeke looked over at me, "it looks like we've found Eren." He had a stupid smile on his face. I sighed and quickly began dressing.

I laced the ODM gear Levi had given me around my person. I didn't have much gas left, but I figured I could find some somewhere. Zeke dressed only into his cargo pants.

"Why aren't you wearing any more clothes?" I asked, packing the rest of our belongings in the suitcases we arrived with in the wagon.

"I like to be less restrained if I'm in a titan form," the keyword here was 'a' titan form. He was expecting to be a part of the founder today. It made me nervous because he'd be putting himself at more risk than ever before. It almost guaranteed his death. "You know that's pointless, unless you'd want to carry our things around while everything is happening. This whole area might be destroyed." I gave him a dirty look and stopped packing.

Once we made it out onto the sidewalk we looked up to find Marleyan blimps in the air, soldiers falling to earth using parachutes.

"Oh, that's really not good...and also surprising," Zeke adjusted his glasses on his face.

We turned our attention to the building at the capital. There we could easily see Eren's attack titan and Galliard sparring. Pieck must not be too far behind, if not with them. It made me worried for my friends. It could very well be the end of their lives should they not take Eren's side.

"Come, we need to get closer," Zeke grabbed my hand and began running down the sidewalk in the opposite direction of those fleeing.

I continued watching, breathlessly, in horror as Eren and Porco struggled. I wish I had some sort of power over the situation instead of feeling so helpless. I had my training from back in the warrior program, but it couldn't compare from A. consistent practice and B. the new training and skills of the scouts who knew how to deal with titans.  Eventually I saw Pieck's titan crawling up the side of the wall. It provided some relief knowing that she was still alive. She sat briefly on the edge of the wall before launching back off. She's running away...but why? Eren suddenly jumped off of the wall, calmly, after what I assumed was Pieck. Suddenly, a yellow ball of lightning formed in the sky from one of the parachutes.

"Reiner!" I gasped as we continued running.

"Shit," Zeke hissed through his teeth, "that's going to cause some problems."

After a few more minutes, a few more blocks, we were at the center of the action, hiding against a wall and watching the two of them fight.

"Please don't leave me here," I whimpered. Zeke seemed very distracted by the action and myself. He glanced between me and the fight in front of us.

Nearby houses were flattened as the two fifteen meter titans collided. Reiner was heavily armored, but Eren was fast and also had some hardening ability. If it weren't about the end of the world, the match-up would be breathtaking and entertaining.  It unfortunately looked very one-sided. Reiner was taking hit after hit until his jaw hung onto his face by only a thread. Reiner built up some strength and took a swing at Eren, launching him into the house next to us.

"We have to get you somewhere safe," Zeke looked at me. He then took me and began running toward the capital building.

We headed underground to where the scouts, and Falco, were. They were all still there, stunned and listening carefully to what was happening on the streets above them.

"If you stay here, you should be safe," Zeke said in a stern voice. "When all is said and done, I'll come and find you should I still be alive. If I don't..." he looked at the faces in the cells, "you," he motioned to the woman with the red scarf, "can you look after her?"

"Why would I do anything for you?" She asked, glaring at Zeke.

"Because Eren knows about her. Eren is going to look after her when I'm...gone. And if something happens to Eren, I'm sure he'd trust his best scout friends," Zeke looked at all of them.

"Get lost," The woman removed eye contact.

"I'll look after her," Levi piped up, getting up from his wheelchair and carefully walking to the cell bars.

"I thought you had a problem with me," I reminded him.

"Eh," he shrugged, "it's not important if you're helpless."

"Well, I wouldn't necessarily be-" I started.

"Thank you, Levi," Zeke looked sincerely toward his nemesis.

"You're welcome, Lotte," Levi looked at me as if I said the words. I rolled my eyes and brought my attention back to Zeke.

"You'd better come back," I said desperately. He nodded quickly and pressed his lips to my forehead.

"I love you," he whispered, resting his forehead against mine. I savored those words, replaying them over and over again in my head as if it were going to be the last time I'd hear them.

"I love you, too," I whimpered. We stood for a few remaining seconds before Zeke rushed back up the stairs. My eyes lingered on the stairwell as if he'd come running back down for me.

"He's not coming back," Levi said in his usual low and angry voice, "if he comes back I'll have his head."

"Not if I can help it," I snarled at him, and looked down at the braces on his legs then back up at his eyes.

"Hey!" One of the soldiers started pounding on a nearby cell door that lead to the outside. "What's going on out there? Let us out! Don't you let us die in here!" Some rumblings were getting closer and closer to the cells.

"Why don't you let us out?" Levi asked politely, face unchanged. I shook my head.

"It has to be a Marley attack, they're probably here to get you," another soldier looked over at Falco.

"Save an Eldian? The Marleyan army would never," Falco sadly shook his head.

"Don't you have family? This is your only chance to make it home. Once Zeke screams...it's all over. I'll never see my wife or kids again," the man reflected.

"Since I'm down here, it would likely be a last resort," I interrupted, "he wouldn't do that unless he seriously had to."

"Onyankopon!" A light-haired soldier ran up to the bars as another stranger walked down the stairs. "What's happening up there now?"

"The Marleyan army is attacking using airships. Their titans are here, too. Eren's fighting them all with Zeke right now!" He exclaimed, grabbing the keys from their peg. I wanted to tell him to stop, but something told me to stay out of it. "He can't last forever, you've all got to help or Marley will steal the founder!"

Once the gate was opened the soldier I recognized as Connie dragged Onyankopon into the cell by his shirt.

"You can't be serious! You think we'd listen to you after all you've done?!" His voice was blood-curdling and vicious. "You really think we'd take orders from a traitor?!"

"I'm sorry!" Onyankopon stuttered. "I had to do what Yelena said or they'd have killed me!"

"You really were acting like one of the nice guys while you were really plotting to take over Paradis with wine!" Connie wasn't taking it and no one was intervening. "I'm done being betrayed. By Reiner...Bertolt...Annie...Eren...I'm sick and tired of it, damnit! Why should we have to help Eren just so none of us could have kids!"

"Connie!" The blond that sat next to red scarf ripped Connie from Onyankopon. "Let's hear him out."

"I honestly didn't know about any of it...the wine, the euthanization plan...just like all the other volunteers," he explained, breathless and on his knees after being choked out.

"I feel like he's telling the truth," A young man who looked familiar from Marley chimed in, Niccolo. "Yelena told us to keep it a secret. They said to never tell the volunteers about the wine."

"Above all, I don't want to help with a euthanization plan. We wanted to help Paradis develop more so that it could help us destroy Marley. That's why I did this...abandoning everything I knew. It was all possible because we thought this island had a future. If euthanization were to be carried out, our work would've been for nothing!" Onyankopon plead. "Please believe me..."

"I do," the blond spoke up earnestly.

"Armin!" Connie looked betrayed...again.

"All of us exist because someone meant for us to exist, even the subjects of Ymir," Armin explained, bending down to help Onyankopon up. "The more people we have in the world, the more interesting. You've shown me that you're ideals are the opposite of Zeke's, that you're who we've always thought you've been."

"Armin," he grabbed his hand.

"I believe you, too," the light-haired soldier spoke up again, "but what do we do now?"

"We need to show the world the rumbling at least once," I spoke up suddenly. The room silenced and turned to me who stood in the corner alone. "Paradis needs to show the world its power at least once and then we need to figure out how to split the brothers up." I choked on my words. I hated thinking of how that could be done once they were joined.

"What do you think, Mikasa?" Armin looked at the woman in the red scarf. "Do you want to save Eren?"

"I do...but," she hesitated, "because I'm an Ackerman...is it even my own free will?"

"Huh?" Connie looked confused.

"I think that's a lie that Eren made up," Armin encouraged her.

"He asked if I get headaches sometimes. I do. What makes you think he'd lie?" Mikasa's voice was soft.

"What?" Armin seemed startled by her question. "Do you really think Eren really wants it to be that we can't have children?" The room stood in silence, thinking about the question.

"Well, I did think it was unlike him," the light-haired soldier spoke up, "but I didn't think it was impossible."

"Jean! It's Eren we're talking about here!" Armin plead.

"But then why wouldn't he just betray Yelena?" Connie argued.

"He doesn't have to! He's the one who decides what to do with the founder's power!" Armin's voice was shrill. "He just needs to activate the rumbling now while we're under attack to show off Paradis' power. If he can annihilate one of the world's greatest powers using the titans in Shinganshina's walls, no one will touch Paradis for another fifty years!"

"I've been saying he's a threat since we were in training," Jean said, crossing his arms, "he's going to drag us into Hell because he's a bastard. And I was jealous...of that bastard. It pisses me off to no end, but...I don't want him dying just yet."

"Yeah, if he died now I'd never have the chance to beat him up," Connie ground his teeth.

And so action began in the cells. Niccolo took some of those left in the cells to a safer place while the other soldiers were freed. I stayed behind in the empty room, contemplating what to do next.

"You coming?" Levi looked behind him as he hobbled his best up the stairs.

"I figured you all wouldn't want me to come, considering..." I blushed, rubbing my arm awkwardly.

"I gave Zeke a promise...technically you, so don't tell him I said that," Levi's stare was cold as always.

The two of us were way behind the others, but catching up, as I helped Levi up the stairs. We went to what must have been the main hall, hearing what the plan was and that there was limited fuel for the ODM gear.

"Hange!" Levi suddenly exclaimed, being embraced tightly by the soldier I saw on the airship.

"Oh, hey! It's you again! Bathroom girl!" Hange greeted me, always joyful. She didn't know how to quite react, unsure of who I was specifically to the plan.

"Hi," I said quietly, "I don't think this one is in any way to fight right now," I motioned to Levi, "I'm sure he'll try..."

"Till his dying breath!" Hange patted him on the back.

All of us from the jailcells, plus Hange, ran up to the top of the building where the action started after grabbing some gear. Yelena was perched on one of the walls, watching the fight. The soldiers also looked in awe at the action. My heart pounded in my chest when I saw Zeke in his beast form, fighting the Marleyan army.

"Zeke's taken down their ships, blocking the gate to Shinganshina," Yelena looked up with stars in their eyes. "It's almost time."

"We need to join the Yeagerists to help Eren save the world!" Armin reminded everyone in an encouraging tone. Yelena suddenly walked right up behind Armin, giving some type of stare of death.

"Please help Eren and Zeke," they whispered, their glare looming over his head, "I believe in you Armin." Without further hesitance, the group launched off the building with the ODM gear.

It really looked like some type of apocalypse. Nearly half of the town was on fire, buildings smashed to pieces, multiple monsters roaming the streets... I looked to the distance to see the cart titan's skeleton atop the wall near Zeke.

"Pieck..." I whimpered, tears filling my eyes as I glided through the air with the others.

I had hoped that Zeke didn't do it...hell, I knew Zeke didn't do it. He had some boundaries. I watched as the cannon atop the corpse started to turn in Zeke's direction, the Panzer unit still in operation. I nearly lost all of my breath as I watched the cannon fire at Zeke. Zeke was standing on top of the wall in his form but was now plummeting to Earth.

"Lotte," Levi looked back at me as we soared through the air, "leave it! Do not go to him. It's too dangerous!" I listened, firing my grappling wire once again to keep up with the others, nearly blinded by tears.

[daikenkki]

epiclafiteau: If Edward and Henry never left Tidmouth Sheds, BUT two engines HAD to leave, who would they be and why? Let me hear what you think! Who would be in their spots? Someone that's been there before, or someone that hasn't? My take btw: Edward and James. Edward at Wellsworth Sheds makes so much sense, and James should've been kicked out as the punishment. Yeah, Thomas/Percy at Ffarquhar would be neat but Toby's at Arlesdale End now. Henry doesn't need to stay at Vicarstown and Emily is just there.

JD41796: Honestly do what the series did and move Edward to Wellsworth because that actually makes sense, and throw Thomas and Percy back with Toby. Have the engines stay closest to their place of work, and have the sheds be what it used to be; whoever is working in that area, stays there.

epiclafiteau: Edward moving to Wellsworth to be closer to his branchline was a smart move, and it made sense. The issue is they're like "Henry's going to Vicarstown ok bye". I'm sure we were supposed to get an episode further explaining it but they haven't done so yet and the only thing to back it up is the fact that Henry is on the Mainland in 70% of the specials lol.

StreakSmeargle: I’d actually kick out three. Thomas, Percy, and Edward. Thomas and Percy can move to Ffarquhar (and honestly Nia can live there too). And Edward can move to Wellsworth like he already does. Fill up the missing Tidmouth slots with Rebecca and maybe the Scots?

epiclafiteau: Unless I'm missing something, I'm not actually sure where exactly Duck, Oliver, Donald and Douglas stay in the CGI Series. We see Ryan, Daisy, Judy & Jerome at Harwick but are there sheds somewhere else on the Little Western? It made sense for Duck to stay at Tidmouth in Duck and the Slip Coaches cause he was needed nearby, something they should do more often, but I don't think we've actually seen where he normally stays.

StreakSmeargle: There should be sheds at Arlesburgh if the RWS is any indication. Duck, Oliver, and Toad would realistically stay there. Donald and Douglas could also stay there but it might make sense to have them at Tidmouth as they’re not strictly tied to Little Western only. Gordon, James, Henry, Rebecca, and Emily can definitely stay at Tidmouth tho. Henry at Vicarstown was a neat concept but it went nowhere so I say move him back.

epiclafiteau: I can get past Edward moving because of etc reasons but the big 3 should definitely stick together. Edward leaving felt sort of natural because it had a whole episode to it and he suggested staying at Wellsworth permanently. Henry liked the idea, followed by deciding to transfer to Vicarstown, and nothing happened.

StreakSmeargle: If they ever do move Henry back to Tidmouth, they could do an episode where he starts reconsidering his decision on moving to Vicarstown but worries about what the others will think. That would allow him to move back and even potentially shedding light on why he moved in the first place.

Jacob34335638: Well, I think James could be kicked out as punishment for destroying the sheds in the first place, and Emily could possibly leave too since she works on the Misty Valley Branchline, and it would be convent for her to be closer to her work like Edward is at Wellsworth Sheds.

epiclafiteau: Yeah, literally. I never understood why they were like "Well James, you destroyed the sheds... Okay, Edward, go find somewhere else to stay".

Echo62445283: Because apparently they were like "Hey thats Edward's part of the shed guess he has to go, not like he can sleep in your spot James".

ComradeSpinel90: Tbh... Percy and Thomas. They have sheds at Tidmouth and Ffharquhar. And in Nia and Rebecca and it would be fine. Or better yet. Drop Nia and add in oh idk... Stanley, or someone underrated imo.

epiclafiteau: Now you're on the right track.

ComradeSpinel90: And it wouldn't be out there norm. There was many time where they were at Tidmouth and Ffharquhar.

ilovetrains3232: The obvious Thomas and Percy go back to Ffarqhuar, Edward going to Wellsworth like in the show because, and as much as some people hate to hear, it was a great idea. They just haven't executed it to it's fullest ability. James could be an interesting choice as a punishment for crashing into it in the first place. I feel like Gordon is the only one who should stay there no matter what. Emily was the reason the 7th she'd was added but that doesn't necessarily mean she HAS to stay there and Henry, should have probably stayed but could easily go somewhere else and it would work. Tidmouth AND Vicarstown both honestly don't make much since for Henry. Yes, Henry does go to the mainland sometimes but not as much as he works elsewhere. If anything, Henry should have moved to Wellsworth with Edward. Since he has to go to Brendam anyways to pick up the Flying Kipper, and Wellsworth is in the center of the island so it would make it easier for him to work anywhere. As opposed to be on either side.

legomastr_365: I love all of them too much to kick anyone out, but seeing the replies makes sense since that's literally what I do in my series.

epiclafiteau: Thomas and Percy is the most logical answer but I'm curious to know if anyone would consider Emily or James, or have other reasons for Thomas/Percy.

GraydonBruckle1: Definitely Emily, as for the other I'm not sure.. I guess Edward or Percy. Edward does make sense BUT he is one of the three original character the Rev W. Awdry wrote about.. Percy could go to Ffarquhar. That way he wont have to go far for the mail run or something like that.

ElliotKW: It would be Thomas and Percy and I'd move them back to Ffarquhar Sheds (even though the sheds are in the yards at Tidmouth Station). Series 2 kept the roots of Thomas, Percy and Toby living in the sheds for five episodes and I would love to see that happen again in the future.

SunilFan48: Thomas and Percy. Go to Ffarquhar sheds with Toby like they did for S2 and then never again. Leaves room for Nia and Rebecca and no Tidmouth Shed reconstruction.

ThomasTheorist: The only engines who really need to be at Tidmouth Sheds are Gordon, Henry and James. Everyone else can be shuffled around.

TheLargeBarge: At Tidmouth Sheds you'll have Henry, Gordon, James, Emily, Rebecca, Donald and Douglas. At Ffarquhar, Thomas, Percy, Toby and Mavis. Knapford Sheds; Nia, Paxton and Rosie. Wellsworth; Edward and Philip. Arlesburgh; Duck and Oliver and Harwick; Ryan and Daisy.

CTFEologist: Thomas and Percy; move them to Ffarquhar with Toby instead.

DanielAlsop2: Well I’d still go with Edward, but also Thomas and Percy to Ffarquhar or Tidmouth Station, since they both work on Thomas’ branch line and if they had the usual adventure encounters, they could meet the others at Knapford or Elsbridge, simple.

GTSHProductions: I’d actually kick Thomas and Percy to live at Farquhar. But to be honest, I liked it better when the engines just slept wherever whenever they wanted.

TFan512: This may be controversial, but I’d still let it be Edward and Henry. Wellsworth is on Edward’s branch line, and he could be a mentor to Philip like he was to Thomas in The Adventure Begins (too bad no episodes have so far done that). As for Henry, he goes up to Vicarstown a lot anyway when he travels to the Mainland, and with him taking The Flying Kipper at night, he hardly has any time to rest at Tidmouth. I don’t agree with James being moved out as punishment, as he showed remorse in An Engine of Many Colours and was forgiven.

NWTom25: I choose three, Edward, Henry and Emily. It make sense to remove Edward to his branch line shed, Henry at Vicarstown since he could run goods trains from there to the mainland and Emily could stay at Knapford sheds like she did in CAE! I honestly don't see the need to remove Thomas and Percy since it had been stated in a Mr. Perkins interval that Knapford was the starting point for Thomas' branch line. So it make sense in the current series to have Thomas and Percy at the sheds. Plus Toby could fill in the spot at the sheds that the engines I chose left and maybe fill in the space for any of the secondary characters (e.g - Duck, Donald, Douglas, Rosie etc.).

TidmouthStudios: Y know if Knapford sheds came back I would LITERALLY LOVE THAT SO MUCH. I think Emily earned her spot in the sheds though and calling all engines definitely made a good move by specifically confirming that Emily was an official part of the core cast.

crikey_fell: Kick out everyone but Henry, Gordon, James and Emily, move them to their RWS positions.

Fan12Thomas: Thomas and Percy they should be on Ffarquhar Sheds.

kirkronan25: I'd chuck Edward to Wellsworth and I kinda like the idea of James having a shed all of his own, but I'm not sure about that.

Diesel20212: Thomas and Percy. I just can’t see them staying in Tidmouth when they already have their own sheds on their branchline.

TruckFan1996: Emily and Henry. I hate Emily and Mattel has made Henry wimpy.

WyattLoughrie: Well Thomas and Percy would have to live at Ffarquhar sheds with Toby and probably have Donald and Douglas take their places in Tidmouth Sheds.

SciFiCosplay99: Maybe have Thomas and Percy move back to Ffarquhar, perhaps add Toby and/or Nia. The Scots then move in. Also, show a shed where the Great Western Engines and the Scots live at some point, please show?

YBoi95: Honestly probably still Henry and Edward. Edward is too smart to be involved in the hive mind mentality of the Steam Team and Henry is just kind of there and doing very little. Honestly the two just don't really contribute enough to be worthy of being main characters.

gwr_fan: Part of me wants Thomas and Percy at Ffarquhar with Toby, Mavis, etc

Mechai94829484: For me it’s Thomas and Percy instead of sleeping in Tidmouth sheds they sleep in the sheds at the ffarquhar station with Toby and Henrietta just like in the railway books.

CementLord: Thomas and Percy, send them off to Ffarquhar.

TidmouthStudios: I’m not mad that Edward left due to the fact that he simply wasn’t offering anything consistently new to the franchise for some time at that point. He’s been outshined by the other core cast members since S5 and him being removed from said cast was inevitable. I’m happy they just did it in a nice and pleasant way and didn’t just suddenly have him leave. He at least got an episode showcasing his goodbye. Going off where he was going to be stationed makes more sense and serves as a sorta mentor for Philip like bill and Ben before him.

FantasticMrS3: I'd go with Emily and James. Then they could be given their own branch line to share, and it would open up more storytelling possibilities for them, especially Emily; God knows more could be done with her as a character.

TomtheSTL: Thomas and Percy, they don’t belong on the mainline or you know, besides the big 3 and Emily, not having a strict cast at Tidmouth, have it change a bit, hell the Brenner era did it on occasion.

HTGE3Prod: Hmm, Edward and Thomas. Both have their respective branchlines to run. At this rate, I wouldn't be surprised if Salty, Bill and Ben are running Edward's line, and Mavis and Toby for Thomas' line.

Edwardandjamesp: Thomas, Percy and Edward. Thomas and Percy can go and sleep at Ffarquhar because that's where they work, and Edward could sleep at Wellsworth with Philip. And the ones to replace them would be Rebecca/Bear and the Scottish boys.

8Puffer: It would make more sense to put Thomas, Percy and Toby at Ffarquhar as it would help develop the three characters more and help build the relationship further.

ChaosDustSteam: I would actually pick three. Thomas, Percy, and Emily. Thomas and Percy would go to the Branchline Sheds, revealed in a new render for CGI. Emily would be moved either to Knapford Sheds or her own sheds, as I feel she is not a Main Line worthy engine.

BJG922: Hmm I would take out Thomas and Percy from Tidmouth and take them to Ffarquhar Sheds like how Edward went to Wellsworth, and keep Henry, Gordon, James and Emily at Tidmouth and allow Bear, Pip and Emma in Tidmouth.

ahmirallthings1: The answers obviously be Thomas and Percy. They lived in Ffarqhuar.

LNERA0X: If we wanted to apply this to all the engines really only Henry, Gordon, James, and Emily should be stationed at the main sheds. Decentralize the cast a bit.

JohnDarkblaze: Thomas, Percy, and Toby. My head canon is that they belong at Ffarquhar like they were before (also considering Arlesdale End hasn't been relevant for a while). As for Tidmoth Sheds itself, I'd leave Edward, James, Henry, and Gordon while adding Rosie, Stanley, and Molly.

TheThomasFan: Thomas and Percy, they’re supposed to be at Ffarquhar.

benbearce96: Toby and Emily because for Toby I just think he’s overrated as a character and Emily, well she can live at the shunting yards with Spencer Murdoch Arthur etc.

IvoryGreen456: Thomas and Percy. Because they were originally based at Ffarquhar they can easily go back.

SayCheeseBurgr: Emily and Edward, but Edward would still remain a main character, purely to line up with old continuity :p

sixteen_dnw: Edward to Wellsworth and Percy to Ffarquahar, they wouldn’t take Thomas away from Tidmouth.

EianHardy: I’d choose Thomas and Percy to go, as a way for them to be with Toby again in the branch line sheds.

TY_HAMMER_TIME: Its a tough one. I see a lot of thomas, percy, and Edward. But i think the "steam team" while still cool concept i think it hurt the series. Why not have a rotating cast of engines at Tidmouth Sheds per season. It would allow the writers to switch the engines in the shead and we wouldn't need to feel that Tidmouth Sheds = 100% steam team residences. Maybe then when Edward and Henry moved out it wouldn't have felt like such a blow or need explanation.

NWRGresley1942: Thomas and Percy because it would make sense that their work are closer to his branch line. Toby could also sleep at Ffarquhar with them. James because he destroyed the back of the sheds and Sir Topham would’ve strictly moved him out.

the_mega_derp: Move Thomas and Percy to Ffarquhar. It can have the same benefit as Edward moving to Wellsworth, since they’d be living on the line they work on. Whatever happened to them vibing in Ffarquhar sheds back in the day?

Jordan192692: I think Percy and Emily; To run the “new” Kirk Ronan branch-line. Thomas would miss both engines, but he would know it was for the best.

jaymeerkat520: It would be Thomas and Percy. Those characters have just become annoying now.

imnotveryfunny0: My take is Edward and Henry, yes, but don’t stick Nia there. Put her and her bland personality at Vicarstown. Put Rosie there with Rebecca, who knows the others but still has some well deserved fleshing out to be done.

HydesR01: Personally, I’d say Emily and Edward. Emily doesn’t really “click” with the originals, and I think Edward would be better suited at Wellsworth anyway. And in their spots, I’d say Rosie instead of Emily and Stanley in place of Edward.

Glover368: Emily and James, just send James back to his early RWS shed, and Emily can go back to Knapford.

RealMay_C: Emily and Henry, Emily is just a badly written character and Henry is just the stereotypical worrier and I'm really not a fan of that trope.

cgsmodelling: Let me say it loud enough so everyone can hear.... JUST ADD TWO MORE FUCKING BIRTHS. ITS NOT THAT DIFFICULT.

SquidTrain2020: Thomas and James can simply fuck off. But instead of Nia, replace James with Rosie and Thomas with Rebecca.

[gondorosi]

The Real, the Only, the Mega Villain

With all the current vitriol and mudslinging and strawmanning and rage floating around the fandom I got to thinking (again) about whose fault it really is. And I realised - we've been duped!! For the last three months we thought that the Night King was a colossal disappointment. We couldn't have been more wrong. His villainy knows no bounds!!

We've been told that the only thing needed for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing. That's true - and what NK counted on for his reign of terror beyond the Wall. Good men (and women) on the other side did nothing, thus contributing to the greatest army the living world has ever seen, an undead dragon and the fall of the Wall.

But that's not all!! See NK is also a savvy strategic genius who would fit right into today's business environment. He knows what got him to the Wall won't get him to Westeros 2.0 (aka DISASTER).

That my friends, is a true Mastermind. A visionary of no uncertain ability!! See, he figured out that he could get incredible results by a remarkable twist on the age-old wisdom.

You can also make evil win by ensuring the bad men do nothing!

See that's why he threw the game. It was all his master plan! Let's consider one by one, shall we?

He brought his entire strength against Winterfell but ensured that only a couple of secondary characters and some tertiary characters died. Grief unites people you see - if everyone surviving lost someone truly important to them then they would form an unbreakable bond which nasty, conniving wannabe queens couldn't manipulate.

He brought all his firepower against one measly crippled boy (or parasitic tree wizard, I honestly don't know at this point). Now that might seem an overconfident strategy to mere mortals but you see he knew what he was doing. If the majority of the army doesn't see them but only hordes of ice zombies, they won't even believe that the Walkers exist. And if they don't believe Walkers ever existed then they will continue to think that only the Iron Throne matters.

He lets himself be fake taken out by a scrappy little kid with a tiny blade. But before that he ensures that atleast Jon and Dany see that he's impervious to dragonfire. This will make them think later - that's it? That's all that took to take out the greatest threat to humanity? You need the only two people capable of leading others to think they're incapable of truly judging the magnitude of a threat.

He lets himself be taken out by someone who's never had anything to do with him in an inexplicable manner which has no explanation. This results in taking away Jon's entire reason for existence. This is ghosting in the worst possible way. For years you've haunted this guy's waking dreams. The poor boy made you his primary reason for existing. He's made sure that you're at the center of his every thought and action. And at the end you let yourself be taken out by a stranger, after spreading your arms and giving him hope that his moment with you has come. Only to leave him cornered and yelling at the last moment.

See his genius? With his life's purpose made meaningless in such an abrupt manner Jon is rudderless. Combined with the knowledge that his father was never his daddy, Jon will never trust his own decisions again. In fact he will be so overwhelmed at being so wrong about the severity of NK's threat that he's going to be incapable of thinking or speaking much after this.

And Dany? She won't know what to think of a threat which is impervious to dragonfire but not little girls with little knives. She will wonder if this threat was even worth it. She will start seeing conspiracies in everything and believe that people who have never seen her accomplish what she has will suddenly love her. She will start thinking that the Throne was all that mattered in the first place and she should never have swerved.

Since Varys, Tyrion and Sansa never saw the Walkers and only the zombies, they won't take much time to get back to their regularly scheduled programming of scheming. I mean the apocalyptic threat they thought would destroy everything turned out to be less destructive than Ramsay so why not get straight back into the game of thrones? Only this time with higher stakes?

And that's why the Night King is such a genius. By becoming an annoying non-entity when least expected he started the process of destroying Jon's ability to think for himself, Dany's ability to rise above her impulses and Sansa's capability of not being a self-serving (redacted).

Oh he's waiting somewhere in the Lands of Always Winter. He'll wait till the continent has crumbled through utter idiocy and mismanagement and greedy grabbing. And then he'll make his move.

[itsclydebitches]

Does genocide/death matter in dbz? What makes Frieza blowing up a planet different then Beerus? Our main cast our friends with the literal gods. We've seen that there is a afterlife and they're multiple ways to bring back the dead. I feel like the ethics of that universe get really complicated and it just doesn't get addressed. Which is fine since the show isn't about that, but something to think about.

The show might not address it but I DO. But no, for real, I’ve thought about this more than I probably should have, anon. Based on those (very broad-stroke) thoughts my general conclusion is that death originally did matter a whole lot, then it didn’t, now it does again in Super. So presenting a very rough timeline: 

During the Dragon Ball era people have notably grown up with death as a permanent thing. Like in real life, they fear it and avoid it and largely don’t know that it can be undone. The dragon balls change this, but at this point they’re a) incredibly difficult to locate, b) often hard to obtain even when located (i.e. at the bottom of an ocean), c) have more rules attached to them (you can only be resurrected so many times), and d) are constantly threatened via the death of Earth’s guardian. So death may not be permanent... but it sure as hell isn’t easy to reverse either. It’s a bit of a pipe dream. 

In the early DBZ era we have this trend continuing. That’s why Goku’s death at the hands of Raditz still has an impact. Same with Krillin’s death as everyone (characters included) are figuring out how the Nemekian balls fit into all this and what exactly they can accomplish with them. It’s important that Krillin died when he did--when death still felt semi-permanent and something of a significant loss--because otherwise we’d have no true motivation for Goku’s Super Saiyan transformation. 

Mid Cell arc into Buu is where I think we start seeing death as a no big deal kinda thing. By this point the dragon balls have far less restrictions attached to them, they can be picked up in just a few hours by our heroes, and the next generation (Trunks and Goten) have an indifferent, “Just use the dragon balls” mentality. Death takes on a slightly different meaning at this point in the story. Part of that includes changing our perspective about death from “They’re gone for forever” to “We just can’t contact them for a long, long time and that’s still pretty depressing”--i.e. Goku leaving for seven years and Gohan not getting to grow up with his father. He might know he’ll see him again someday, but that doesn’t lessen the emotional difficulty of being alone then and there. 

Another consideration at this point is whether someone WILL bring you back--i.e. Frieza fears his hell because barely anyone cares about him + his henchmen don’t stand much chance against our heroes, the ones hanging out around those dragon balls. The conflict of “The dragon balls are only useful if you can get ahold of them” has changed from “Wow these are really hard to find/access” to “Shit they’re now controlled by a small group of very powerful people.” We start to see the balls as a coveted resource. Just because they exist doesn’t mean you get to use them. 

More importantly though, I think during this era the how and when people die takes center stage, not necessarily that they did die. I think a good example of this is when Piccolo thinks Buu killed Gohan and the Supreme Kai is fearful that he’ll die at the hands of his blast. For each there’s a general sense of “This shouldn’t happen”--because dying is horrible and painful and if you care about this person you don’t want them to go through that--but also a sense of “If Gohan dies now we have one less person to fight Buu, so Buu might destroy the entire Earth before we can resurrect anyone, so we might not have a way of bringing ANYONE back EVER.” It’s a domino effect. The conflict now is who is dying, when they’re dying, and whether their death will impact the others’ ability to fix things at the end of the day. We see the same thing happening in Super when Frieza destroys the Earth in his last moments. Death is suddenly a threat again because the heroes’ solution to this problem was erased alongside life itself. No more dragon balls. The gods they know can’t magically make a whole planet and its life reappear. There’s nothing to do... except Whis’ temporal do over. And that has a 3min limitation/can only be used once every X amount of time. Meaning the next time Whis CAN do it far more than 3 mins will have passed, making the technique useless. If they don’t fix things now they never will. 

Which leads us to Super as a whole. Overall I think it’s done a very good job of re-establishing the stakes. First we’re shown through that Frieza moment that the level of power these characters hold now means that destruction can happen instantaneously... sometimes too quickly to do anything about it, even when you’d normally have ways of fixing stuff after the fact. Then we learn about the pretty much limitless super dragon balls, but they’re spread across two universes. Good luck getting those in a hurry. Most significantly though, we’re introduced to characters whose power exceeds everything else we know about death. Like Beerus’ hakai. Or Grand Zeno’s abilities. Maybe you can wish people back with the regular or super dragon balls... but that ultimately won’t matter if you’re erased entirely from your timeline and don’t even exist in an afterlife anymore. Or your entire universe is erased, along with any of those magical objects. 

These are the kinds of people that our heroes risk pissing off nowadays. Like the rest of the series, the stakes keep getting higher. If normal death doesn’t mean much anymore--we can wish you back, visit you in Other World, undo time, etc.--then you have to introduce pure erasure instead. A lack of existence across all worlds and timelines. That’s why the Tournament, to my mind anyway, still had weight. Everyone watching knew that the winner could use the super dragon balls to wish things back to normal... but whether the Grand Zenos would let them was the question. For all the characters know they might have used their little wish orbs and then the Omni Kings went, “Nope!” and erased everything again. Their power is just too substantial to combat if they’re insistent on making death permanent. 

(As a side note regarding Beerus and Frieza: Frieza is the exact sort of guy that Beerus is supposed to deal with... but then didn’t. Same with Buu. Beerus’ destruction exists to keep balance. Our DBZ villains’ destruction exists to cause selfish chaos. However, we’re shown time and time again that Beerus is sleeping instead of doing his job (resulting in death that should never have happened, like the supreme kais); he’s destroying worlds not because balance requires it, but because he didn’t like their food. He even threatens his entire universe by picking a fight with Goku. Beerus, bluntly put, isn’t good at his job, but ultimately I like that about him. It emphasizes how fallible and human ALL the gods are. They’re not perfect, etherial beings who appear unknowable to us and therefore exist as characters we can’t connect with... they’re all screwups in their own ways lol). 

[iamcinema]

IAC Reviews #19: Wishbone (2000)

Hey, is anyone still alive out there? I hope so.

Coming off of last year was a disaster, and well, we didn't enter 2021 on the highest of notes. I guess you could say I've been burned out and not having a ton of motivation to do a lot, even with how much I've been grinding on Letterboxd over the past few months. I think I'm ready to come back, and since there's a storm is brewing outside, let's make today a movie night...and boy, do I have a treat for you.

I think I've made it kind of apparent that I have a weakness for terrible, low-budget, trash fires. There's something oddly charming about them where they always find a way to lure me in, and given the scene on Letterboxd, there's a bunch of SOV masochists out there waiting to get their next fix. While digging around for material to cross off my lists on titles to find and add, I was reminded of a terrible, low-budget film that was shot in my hometown over 20 years ago. I'm full of fear for what's to come, and you should be too.

________________________________________

Wishbone is a 2000 horror film directed by Timothy Gaer and co-created by Michael Fasciana, centering on a woman named Laurie who receives an unusual artifact from her eccentric aunt she acquired from a pawn dealer that causes those around her to disappear when they make wishes on it. Hmm, seems simple enough. Let's what we're in for, and I'm absolutely not ready because the IMDb page says this shit is over two hours long, despite a version on Youtube having it just a bit over 90 minutes. Let us pray.

Wishbone in One Gif:

This acting is might be the death of me, but I'm not sure what's going to be the catalyst that causes me to fall down the stairs and break my neck: the sound quality, the weird editing, or the music...oh, god what the fuck is the music doing? So much noise, noise noise!

Okay, so let's dig into this before I take too long of a break and I don't come back to this. I've already had to pause the movie a few times to catch my breath or just rewind and go back because there's a good amount that I keep missing because, apparently, the star of the film is the score and not Laurie. This is so, so slow. I've seen a lot of long horror movies, but at least with those, it feels like things are happening. Even Blood Lake had filler that did something to some degree, and with that, it was consistently bad. This movie doesn't even know what it wants to do. So, as a disclaimer, there's a good chance I'm probably missing some key details that I didn't hear because it seems that characterization isn't important if the music insists on talking over everyone.

________________________________________

So, to date, this might be one of the worst horror movies (and movies in general) that I've ever seen and it might be one of the slowest things in the entire megaverse. This is over 90 minutes of, somehow, nothing and something happening simultaneously - if that makes any sense.

This takes its sweet ass time moving along and there's so little pay-off. The majority of the characters are either nameless or we aren't introduced to them in a way that matters enough for us to care about them. It's kind of like with Violent Shit and other low-budget slasher films where the majority of the characters serve no purpose but to be disposable. Next to the two main leads, Laurie and Joe, and maybe a few others, everyone is just forgettable and even then I couldn't honestly tell you anyone's name if it was explicitly brought up. IMDb isn't helpful either, and at this point it just makes me care even less. I'm not sure if my patience has been tested too much with this, but it's kind of sad that I'm more invested in seeing what the background characters are doing than Laurie and Joe - even though I can't really hear what the hell they're saying.

Yeah, I really can't move on without talking about the sound and the music. Why is it always the audio with these movies? This has an estimated budget of $100,000, or $154,779.43 today in August 2021. How do you have the ability to somehow not make this look like a potato for the most part, well for the day shots that is, but you don't have it in you to get a good mic and someone who knows how to mix and edit correctly? I would sort of understand if you spent the majority of the money on talent to cut corners, but this is just ridiculous. Did they use the cameras' built-in mics to catch the audio here?

I feel like I need to interrupt the movie constantly to tell them to speak up because if I turn up the volume, I'm just getting bombarded with this really weird soundtrack that doesn't fit. I shit you not, during one of the kill scenes, the music booming over it sounds like it was ripped from Kevin MacLeod's "lounge" library and then the reverse happens where ominous music is playing over a more touching scene - and that's not even a dig at Kevin as an artist. That's just how inappropriate and unfitting this editing is. The weird fucking thing about this specific kill scene is that it sounds like the audio is stacked, so there are two different instrumental tracks going on.

How do you fuck something as basic as tension up like that? The audio choices are so painfully inconsistent and it doesn't know what it wants to do. There are moments where you can hear the dialogue just fine, but then the music comes in out of nowhere to segway us into the next scene and it starts to muffle things out. If it isn't that, then the dialogue is just so soft that you'd think there was a pillow on the mic or we're hearing them from the opposite side of a sound-dampened room.

This is what I meant earlier when I said I apologize in advance if I miss anything crucial because I can't make out half of these conversations. So, I'm having to keep going back if I care enough or just having to pause and take breaks because there's only so much I can handle. This means that there's a good amount I'll blank on because I have to keep going back because I can't remember the majority of these no-named characters. Who the fuck are you people? Why am I supposed to care?

If I'm understanding the non-existent rules of the wishbone, you're connected to whoever dies in some way. So, why is any of this relevant to what's going on? If it's random, then it's another reason for me not to care just because some frat kids made a wish at some point. Again, who the hell are you and why am I supposed to lament over them? Why is there so much useless filler here? Did I mention that this is over 90 minutes long and there are *three* fucking party scenes? Party scenes are to Wishbone as ten-minute-long jetskiing and beer game scenes are to Blood Lake.

Oh, speaking of other shit that's annoying. Let's talk about general editing because the sound isn't the only thing that's a mess here.

I swear that almost every single scene in this ends with a fade-out/fade-in shot. Only one or two scenes come to mind where this doesn't happen, and the first time it did I thought my browser was freezing because it abruptly cut to black and then smash cuts to a party scene. I've never, ever seen a movie that abused this that much before and it's on par with something I would have seen made by a bunch of high school kids. So, when we have a moment where this doesn't happen and it plays out normally, it feels like a breath of fresh air. I'm sure this movie's run time could have been shaved down by at least a minute or two if this wasn't a problem, along with all the useless close-up shots that serve nothing to the plot.

It's such a waste of time. I'm so fucking tired. How was this movie's budget $100k? Did they spend most of it on renting the Scranton Police Department for a few shots or did it go towards their impromptu trip to Party City? I'm so tired and I don't care anymore.

Do you want to know what the real kicker is? With just barely twenty minutes left, the whole lore about the monkey's wishbone paw comes back and that's when Laurie and her friend Karen think something is weird. Isn't this whole realization trope that happens within the first or second act, not now with your Great Value brand version of the Dream Warriors?

Also, it's not specified how much time has gone by since the start, but it has to have been at least a week or two. It's incredibly weird how they paint the main characters and the unnamed background ones as such good friends that they don't think it's weird how almost all of them have disappeared - especially one girl who doesn't seem off-put that her boyfriend (or ex) disappeared after getting into an argument at one of the parties and none of his friends could reach him either at his own house.

The final showdown is an utter pain in the ass to get through because the conflict ends as abruptly as it starts and it's so unsatisfying. We get to see the face of our villain, I guess, and then more or less cut to our leads holding hands down the street set to the same looping lounge music we've been dealing with for over 90 damn minutes. Is everyone else who went with them dead? Did they live? Who cares! That's one thing the movie and I can agree on since we never see them again. We end on a shitty cliffhanger that's supposed to prepare us for a sequel, which thankfully never happened.

________________________________________

And that was Wishbone. Holy fucking shit, I've never been so thankful for a movie to be over in my life. It's 11:07 PM as of tinkering with some minor revisions and I've been in purgatory with this for over five hours, and yet, it feels like an entire lifetime has gone by.

I've raved about how bad Blood Lake was with its incredibly bad pacing, but this is next level awful and a testament to bad filmmaking if I've ever seen it. I expect a lot of the things I complained about from super amateur filmmakers who are shooting on an actual shoestring budget, not people who had that much money to fuck around with. How did they have that kind of a budget, and the most they can give us is bad audio, Windows Movie Maker levels of basic editing, three wrap parties, and a few crumbs of gore that we could see?

This was physically painful to see and I'm in much worse shape having endured it than I would have been if I sat through something liked Boardinghouse, and that has a two-and-a-half-hour-long version tied to it. This is just a marvel and I mean that in a so-bad-it's-bad way, not like how SOV enthusiasts who love this stuff pine over. If I had to give one thing going for it, one single granule of gold that I enjoyed from this, it's the limited shots we get of the area so I could make a game out of seeing what local spots I recognized. If playing I Spy is the only way for someone to endure your movie, then I don't know what else to say.

Wishbone is a hot mess where shit's happening, but also nothing is happening at the same time. I wouldn't wish this on anyone. In fact, I wish this movie never existed or would die in the ether and never return to our mortal realm ever again. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go have a smoke and hope I don't get run over by a hearse tomorrow.

RATING: 0.5/10

[thelovingschool]

The Fantastic Four to the Fourth Power, Part 1

I've recently finished Doris Kearns Goodwin's excellent book, Leadership in Turbulent Times, in which she details the ways in which four US presidents served as leaders through pivotal historical moments. I reaffirmed my admiration for Abraham Lincoln, as Goodwin discusses his push to make the Emancipation Proclamation a reality. I was invigorated by the way in which Teddy Roosevelt used the executive branch of government to benefit the citizens of the northeast USA during the Coal Miners' Strike of 1902. I gained new appreciation, wonder, and awe in the way that Franklin Delano Roosevelt led the country during his first 100 days in office in the middle of the Great Depression. I came to greatly respect the legislative leadership of Lyndon Johnson as he pushed the most dramatic and beneficial domestic agenda, his Great Society, including the landmark Civil Rights Act of 1965. Whatever else Johnson may have done or not done, particularly as it relates to foreign policy and the Vietnam War, his impact on the lives of the citizens in the USA cannot be discredited.

Reading about these four presidents as they grew up, faced challenges ranging from losing elections to losing family members to losing the ability to walk, and ultimately served in the highest office of the nation to great effect was a wonderful experience. I was struck by the common themes that ran through all four of the presidents' leadership challenges. Synthesizing the lessons learned from all presidents, it seems that a leader during turbulent times must:

Have a clear sense of purpose

Adapt along the way to achieving that purpose

Build a solidly functioning team

Pay attention to messaging and timing

Build in time for yourself

Having a clear sense of purpose -- In the summer of 2020, three amazing principals, Sanee Bell, Brian McCann, and Beth Houf gave a phenomenal webinar as part of the virtual National Principals Conference. Beth shared a story of her superintendent bringing the principals in her district together at the beginning of the pandemic and asking them all to spend some time thinking about their purpose, their "why" before sharing them as a group. (Beth's "why" was maintaining relationships with students.) Other leaders have focused on the importance of having a clear purpose, including and especially Baruti Kafele. As we've all learned, what was true before the pandemic only has become exaggerated during the pandemic, and so the need for a clearly defined sense of purpose is truly vital now. My "why" during the pandemic has been to ensure that the teachers with whom I'm lucky enough to work are supported with what they need to be as effective as possible given the challenges of the pandemic.

Be adaptive along the way -- As I've already written, I am a student of philosophy as well. One of my favorite professors, Father Joe Flanagan, was a huge Socrates' fan, and every college freshman can tell you that Socrates is famous for noting how little he knew. In order to achieve your purpose, it's important to accept that we don't have all of the answers, and we will need to continually learn and grow as we work toward our goals. I have personally learned a great deal from the work of Ron Heifetz as he discusses Adaptive Leadership. Without going into another book report (I want to save that for another post), in order to be an adaptive leader, one must understand that the leadership challenge you're facing is not simple to fix, and will require a great deal of learning. Back to that webinar at NPC20, Sanee discussed how even the simple question "how are you?" carries new meaning during the pandemic. If you're going to ask that question, you need to be prepared that you might not get a quick response back. It might even be the start of a very long conversation, and that is OK. We as leaders will need to spend time maintaining those relationships empathetically throughout the pandemic.

Similarly, I realized that while I work hard to build positive culture in my school, supporting teachers during this pandemic is something I simply didn't know how to do. I'm very fortunate to be taking a course through ASCD on supporting educator mental health. The lessons I'm learning have been immediately applicable with the team at our school. Adapting along the way means sometimes changing tactics based on new information, but if you aren't seeking out that new information you won't be able to get where you're going.

Build a solid team -- It goes without saying that none of us can do our jobs alone anymore. None of us ever really could before, either. In The Long Distance Leader, summarized here, authors Kevin Eikenberry and Wayne Turmel talk about the important of relying on your team and supporting your team throughout the times when you won't physically be together. The principal I currently work with centered his entry plan three years ago on creating and maintaining a strong divisional leadership team, and he has taught me so much over the course of our partnership. While pandemic economic circumstances have meant our partnership is to come to an end in a couple of months, I am headed to my own first principalship this August, and I feel extremely fortunate. When I asked the Head of School at my future school what he is proudest of (this is his first year there), he said that had he been able to create a leadership team from his 30 years of experience in international schools, he couldn't have created a better team than the one he inherited. That is exactly the kind of joyful, strengths-based, empowering, and collaborative leader I want to work with, and knowing that he shared that information in front of members of the leadership team shows that he is willing to give credit and appreciate his team.

I heard Ben Zander, the conductor of the Boston Philharmonic, share his insight about leading, that people come to the symphony to hear music, and yet he as conductor is the only member of the orchestra who doesn't make a sound. We as leaders are strengthened by the strengths of our team. We know from the extensive literature out there and our own experience how important it is to have trust on a team, and I'll simply relate something one of my own teammates once said at a previous school about our grade-level team of teachers: "We know each other, so we like each other, so we support each other as we work together."

Messaging Matters -- I can't say it any better than Will Parker does in his book, which my partner principal and I have been learning from all year. Similarly, I loved hearing Joe Sanfelippo at the NPC in Boston in 2019 talk about the importance of shaping the narrative about education, because unless we as school leaders shape the narrative, others are going to fill in the blanks with a negative story. For me, the best example of positive storytelling about school comes from Brian McCann. His article in the latest Principal Leadership magazine is one more example of the ways in which Brian models not just for his teachers, but for the larger professional learning community to which he belongs. In fact, utilizing Brian's idea of Positive Sign Thursday is one of the factors that enabled me to land my next job, so I'm extremely appreciative. The point in all of these examples is of course a lesson that Lincoln knew 160 years ago, that it is through story that we can best communicate our purpose. It's not always easy, finding the balance between too much communication and too little, between being optimistically realistic as opposed to toxically positive, but if we as leaders aren't attending to messaging, we'll lose our chance to build a positive culture.

As an example, we committed to maintaining contact with our families during this school year and having the chance to get feedback from them at least once a month. We did extensive work in August, had a check in virtual town hall during September, and had individual and small group conferences with teachers and students in October. Things were going well. But, as November came along and fatigue set in, we stopped being as intentional about meeting systematically with our parent body, and by the time January rolled around we started to receive emails that were letting us know that we weren't opening up a space for all voices in the community to be heard, and that was leading to speculation and unrest. We're still very fortunate to have a caring community that share ideas in respectful ways, and we have since re-instituted those intentional communication systems at a minimum monthly, and are therefore back to where we had been, but the lesson around the intentionality of messaging is well learned.

As the above example illustrates, timing matters as well. The presidents often had to be wise about when to act and when not to act, when to send messages and when to not send messages. I think of the West Wing episode when President Bartlet's team discusses sending out unpleasant news on Friday afternoons, or "the trash" because no one reads the news on Saturday mornings. Or I think of how fantastic it has been to be able to, just within the last couple of years, schedule emails to be sent at certain times. Of course there are times that I am working late into the evening, but I would feel terrible in the past when I would send out an email at 10 p.m. and get an immediate response from a teacher. There are studies out there that emails received at 6 a.m. are most likely to be read, and my guess is emails received at 10 p.m. are most likely to make you think your principal is a jerk!

Time and Space for Yourself -- Thinking about the presidents, Lincoln would go to the theater or read comedy aloud, Teddy Roosevelt would take strenuous walks, FDR collected stamps. Only Lyndon Johnson had no real outlet activity, and I wonder, if he had been better at taking care of himself throughout his presidency, might he have attended to foreign policy better. Few topics have gotten more press in the educational world lately than self-care for educators, and this is a focus area in the ASCD course I'm taking as well. I am also fortunate to be a part of a group of school leaders that gather for virtual instructional "rounds" periodically, organized by a former professor at Lehigh, Jon Drescher. Self-care came up at the most recent Rounds I attended, and to be honest I find this so difficult. "If we are always working from home, and we're always home, aren't we always working?" was the question I posed, and I have had real trouble answering this. Heifetz and Linsky talk about anchoring yourself by having a confidant to talk with and a sanctuary, be it a ritual, an activity, or a place to disconnect from the demands of the job.

This was especially challenging for me in 2020, as I know it was for many of us, as the hours spent on screens and away from my normal rituals of walking and playing the piano were disrupted by the sheer demands on the job. I've gained thirty pounds in the past year, and I physically don't feel like myself. More importantly, emotionally I have struggled at times. I have been exploring different ways to recover, and like Lincoln I find comedy is helpful. If I can get in a good laugh before bed I sleep better, whether that's watching old clips of Robin Williams doing standup or Netflixing Seinfeld's Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee. At this point I'll try anything and everything so that I can begin, now that the pandemic is hopefully turning a corner, to feel like myself again.

Part of feeling like myself again is the ability to create something, to produce, based on one of my favorite activities: reading! It's been a joyful experience reading the Goodwin book and the Heifetz/Linsky book, and trying to apply the lessons learned from both to my current role and point in my career. My next post will combine another of my great loves, Harry Potter. Stay tuned to find out which president fits in which house; Gryffindor, Slytherin, Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw! Thanks for reading.

[gigil-bot]

11.15.18 I finally have some time to jot my thoughts down.. I finally have a breather now that the election is over. And what an election this was.

But before I begin, I want to give a shoutout to xxx.You inspire me. I might not speak to you, and I might not like you. But I am inspired by you. By your passion, by your resilience, by your ability to make others feel special, by your ability to build community. By your ability to give yourself to your work and your art.

But what you also remind me is that there are shitty people out there.. who work really hard.. people who will use and walk over others.. manipulate them without empathy or remorse.. people who will make another's life a living hell and justify it.. people who can bring others behind their evil ideologies for one reason or another... and knowing these people exist gives me reason to not delay. To work harder. To push myself to my limits because that's where growth occurs, and not only that, it's because I know that if I am not working as hard as the opposition, my team will lose and many people will continue to suffer..

Now I know this is not a matter of us versus them because in the grand scheme of things, we are all one, we are all connected. But at the individual and community levels, people are affected. And in the grand scheme of things all of us are impacted by actions and inactions. Each of us is a node in a larger network. Each of us matters. And every decision one node makes affects the rest of us. I want to create a net positive with the life of my node to uplift all the nodes around me.. and evetually in the entire network.. I want to create a net positive outcome in the lives of whoever my actions can affect.. in whatever way I can as long as I remain ethical and values-driven.

Fidelity, justice, autonomy, beneficence, nonmaleficence, integrity -- this is my creed, the creed of all helping professionals.

For the past couple of months, I have been growing.. sometimes in the hot scorching sun, but growing nonetheless. And now, more than ever, do I feel prepared to make a difference. To apply my knowledge and values and put it into practice.. compassion, empathy and a willingness to do good. I have done so much and have learned so much in the past couple of months, I feel like a different person. I feel equipped with the tools, experience, and knowledge to do more and to be more..

And we've are seeing the results of my and others' collective action. We are growing in numbers- the people called to mobilize and improve the lives of the members of their communities and bring hope for the future..

We took back the house... and more and more, women are rising up and empowering one another to do the same. I am grateful to be a part of this movement, this culture shift, where women are no longer victims, no longer survivors, but fucking badass warriors who have seen shit and have been through some shit but still show up every single day to battle their demons and take care of business.

I love where I am. Now don't get me wrong, like I said, growth is not always easy.. I didn't want to wake up today. There was a period of time where I didn't want to continue because I had been through the fire.. been chewed out, so stressed out I felt my body on fire and electricity surged through my veins.. but we breathe and push through.. when everyone was telling me it's not worth it, I should quit, I should give up, I kept going, and I will keep going.. because I believe in what I am doing. I believe that what I am doing is making a difference. It already has.. In have gotten to see.. first-hand the spark, and now it's a slow burn until we see the culmination of our work come to life, but as we grow and empower more women, things can only get better. Gender parity 2020!

And finally, I have to end with my gratitude.. I know I am exactly where I was meant to be. I have so much to be grateful for. 3 years ago, 5 years ago, I was wishing for something like this and through a series of events, here I am. I am so supported and so loved by God, The Universe, Source, and I know NOTHING can take that away from me.

I wanted to make a difference.. in my journal about 2 or 3 years ago, I wrote, "I want to gain the knowledge, skills, and experience necessary to become an effective community leader, a positive role model, and to make a positive impact on my community and the world through my work in government, social services, an agency, etc. I want to enact positive, sustainable change for future gens."

And this was before my internship experience with an agency that serves children of abuse, this was before my work with the women's center, before my experiences with my women's leadership network, and before I even knew the org that I am working with now.. existed..

As Steve Jobs stated, "You can never connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking back." My dots weren't just dots. My dots were stars, and my life has been a constellation. My fate was written in the stars, and I am so grateful for my life.. and everything I had been through because I am here today. Doing the work that needs to be done to empower the people who are going to lead our future.

And finally finally, I could not been here without my fellowship funders and the people who believed in me and gave me a chance-- Rosalina, Millie, Sara, Dr. E, Dr. V, National-- Dr. Cuillado, Tsihai, Marta, Arianna, Dr. Stout and all the women and people who have been here for me since day 1: my grandma, Brandon, Nathan, my brother

And the people who supported me along the way: Auntie Helen and Uncle Bing, Heidi, my supervisor at ASI-- so many many people

Above all, is God, obv, but right below is my boyfriend who is unwavering in his loyalty, who shows me love and support through his actions, and inspires me to be myself and be okay with who I am.. he is slowly breaking me out of my shell.. the shell I created as an abused and neglected child. A child who went through the trauma of separation from their primary caregiver as a 1 year old.. and then again as a 3 year old.. S/O to my Child Abuse, Psych, and HUSR classes for teaching me about my traumas and helping me learn to heal from them. It was a huge light bulb moment to learn abiut why Inal the way Inam because of what happened to me in my formative years. I have attachment issues because baby me thought I was abandoned at 1.. and then baby me was taken away again at 3. The formative years create those templates for relationships.. then physically and emotionally abused and neglected.. Boy what a template. He's showing me that not everyone will scream or get angry at me at the drop of a hat.. that people can be kind and considerate of one another.. that collaboration happens everywhere and not just in a team or classroom setting.. it happens in a family.. in a household. I grew up in a completely different environment where I was in survival mode all the time.. every kid for themselves.. and I lived in so much fear and anxiety.. every. single. day. But I didn't know that's what I was experiencing.. living in this household with my boyfriend.. is a stark contrast to what I grew up in.. and I am learning what normal can be.. and it's nice. It's safe. And he feels like home.

[junker-town]

Here’s everything we've learned about Kyrie Irving since his Christmas 2016 game-winner

He’s woke and ready to lead the Celtics.

On Christmas Day 2016, nearly a year to the day, then-Cavaliers star Kyrie Irving drove to the rim, turned around and faded away over Klay Thompson to swish a mid-range shot that sunk the Warriors. That shot gave the basketball world some false hope that the Kevin Durant-Warriors weren’t going to take the Finals over the Cavs with ease. Obviously, that wasn’t the case, and a lot has changed since.

In 365 days, fans have learned more about Irving than maybe any other athlete in the world in that span. He revealed his jealousy over the attention LeBron James garnered when he made a trade request to Boston. He preached “wokeness” and round earth denial in several interviews. Most importantly, he has shown us his ability to lead a team on his own with the Celtics’ success. Irving has transformed from merely James’ counterpart to begin his own legacy.

This Christmas, we look at Irving — the person and the player — differently than last, now that he’s given us a glimpse inside his mind. We are all very much woke because of it.

Here’s everything Kyrie taught us in 2017:

He’s a flat-Earth truther

All the way back in February, Irving took center stage after he went on Richard Jefferson’s podcast to reveal his disbelief in the Earth’s roundness.

He was dead serious.

Kyrie Irving was trending on Twitter today because he believes the Earth is flat. I asked him about it. http://pic.twitter.com/ODe9aP9qmK

— Arash Markazi (@ArashMarkazi) February 18, 2017

Kyrie: I think people should do their own research, man. Then hopefully they’ll either back my belief or throw it in the water. I think what I think is interesting for people to find out.

Reporter: You’ve seen pictures of the planet though, right? Like it’s a circle.

Kyrie: I’ve seen a lot of things that my educational system had said was real, but turned out to be completely fake. So I don’t mind going against the grain in terms of my thoughts and what I believe in.

This started the conversation on the man behind the athlete we had watched put the ball in the hoop to win games for the last seven years. This is where the Kyrie renaissance truly began.

Some believe he was just making his flat Earth belief up for attention. A Cleveland.com reporter, Joe Vardon, mentioned how upset Irving used to be that other reporters flocked to LeBron instead of him for quotes on politics and racial and social issues.

Then Richard Jefferson also defended Irving, saying his statement was made more as an attempt to get people to think outside the box.

Irving walked back his flat-Earth beliefs a few months later, when he said in a CBS interview, “All I want to do is be able to have that open conversation. It was all an exploration tactic. It literally spun the world — your guys’ world — it spun it into a frenzy and proved exactly what I thought it would do in terms of how this works... Do your own research, don’t come and ask me. At the end of the day, you’re going to feel and believe the way you want to feel. But don’t knock my life over that.”

So was this all just a bunch of trolling by Kyrie?

A month after that interview, he went on UConn basketball coach Geno Auriemma’s podcast, and sort of went back to his old ways after it was pointed out that pictures of a round earth exist.

“I’m saying, Coach, that you don’t even know if they’re real or not,” Irving said. “I just wanted to have that conversation. That’s it. I wanted to actually know or ask other individuals, Bro — excuse me — Coach and Sue, do you really think that this actually happened? I don’t know. I don’t know, either. I just want to know.”

Who the heck knows what this never-ending saga was ever about.

Kyrie was a little jealous of LeBron’s stardom

There didn’t seem to be a good basketball reason for Kyrie — or anyone for that matter — wanting to leave one of, if not the greatest ever to play the game. LeBron James has won three championships, and as long as he’s alive, any team with him on it will be in the running again. With LeBron on the team, the game comes easier for everyone around him to stick to their specific role, while he cleans up the mess. Playing with LeBron James seems on the outside to be pretty freakin’ fun!

Irving wanted more, though. So after simmering tension hurt the Cavaliers’ season, Irving requested out of a team that had been to three straight Finals.

He didn’t want to live in The King’s shadow even after he hit the game-winning shot of the 2016 Finals. He didn’t want to hear it from LeBron anymore when he had zero assists in a game. He knew he could be so much more somewhere else.

Irving reportedly wanted to be the focal point of an offense and cement his own legacy.

That says a lot about how Irving thinks of himself as one of the NBA’s best players.

He’s already showing us why he made his decision in Boston.

Kyrie is very much woke

Kyrie gave us quotes on quotes that were wordy, confusing, and yet, often left us wanting more. He opened his mind and let the weirdness out like few others have.

There was the time he told us that if you’re very much woke, there are no such things as distractions:

oh if ur very much woke there is no such thing as distractions http://pic.twitter.com/VsQ6pWURTE

— jack (@jackhaveitall) September 18, 2017

The time he took 1,000 words to (politely) tell off Max Kellerman:

The homie Max Kellerman bout to have a nervous breakdown trying to get ONE answer out of Kyrie. Dude is dodging everything http://pic.twitter.com/IL3P97jPyA

— Roy Wood Jr- Ex Jedi (@roywoodjr) September 18, 2017

And then just a few more:

Max Kellerman is sick of yo sh*t #AnswerTheDamnQuestions http://pic.twitter.com/BkO3qtPSbF

— Roy Wood Jr- Ex Jedi (@roywoodjr) September 18, 2017

Then he told us his favorite artists from when he was a kid:

Last week, the Celtics shared their favorite music to listen to in high school... Rozier: Gucci Mane Jaylen: OutKast Baynes: Eminem Hayward: Eminem Morris: Boys II Men, Jay Z Horford: Maná Kyrie: RENT and Phantom of the Opera

— Boston.com Celtics News (@BDCCeltics) December 19, 2017

Irving told Bleacher Report about how he became awake after going vegan:

"It works," Irving tells B/R Mag. "I mean, I'm not eating a whole bunch of animals anymore. Once you become awake, you don't see that stuff anymore."

There’s a lot to even dissect just from his Instagram bio:

Kyrie Irving was entirely himself in 2017, and created a brand as the NBA’s quirky guy seven years into his career. He’s a full-package superstar now, leading a team of youngsters atop the Eastern Conference all while being the center of attention he couldn’t receive in Cleveland.

His numbers are nearly identical to what they were a season ago, averaging 25 points, five assists and three rebounds, but as an improved defensive guard, Boston is rolling with him at the helm. Maybe they’re just woke.

2017 was the year of Kyrie Irving.