#what tracks? id assume not all of them

[existencebringsonlypain]

someone draw hunter in a long flowy red dress for me

He deserves a flowy dress. Or at least a flowy skirt. Coming from a cis afab, nothing compares to the euphoria of finding a long skirt that's comfortable and you can spin around in. Paired with a blazer ofc.

[theflytecharm]

It only took a couple of years, but here are some more Sep Stats! Following on from the charater graphs in Magyk (find them in my post here) here are the deets for all of the characters that make an appearance in Flyte

Over the books 49 chapters (plus prologue and epilogue) a grand total of 148 characters make an appearance, a whole 54 than in Magyk.

1st Plot is a stacked bar graph showing the amount of chapters that the major charaters in Flyte appear/are mentioned in. The total chapters they appear in are shown in blue, with chapters that they are only mentioned in are shown in red. Jenna is in the most amount of chapters (47/51), closely followed by Septimus at 46 and Simon on 44.

2nd plot is another stacked bar graph of the same format, this time showing the more minor characters. All characters here appear/are mentioned less than 5 times.

I use appear to mean that the charater is physically in a scene, and mention to mean that the charater is spoken about (either by name or clearly identifiable info) but not actually there. Interestingly enough, Jenna has the highest total but Septimus actually appears in more chapters.

If you'd like a more visual representation of how the charaters appear through the book, here's my log of the top 25 charaters! Mentions are shown in amber, appearances in green.

rejoice in the chaos

[ghostlygraphist]

ai generated mushroom guides could get people killed

'i'm not going to link any of them here, for a variety of reasons, but please be aware of what is probably the deadliest AI scam i've ever heard of: plant and fungi foraging guide books. the authors are invented, their credentials are invented, and their species IDs will kill you"

"update: i keep getting annoyed that the QTs are like "if this is true, it's horrifying" ..but you're right, you don't know me from a hole in the ground and you SHOULD worry about the veracity of anything you find online."

thread source

so i went looking

the full description:

How to quickly become a confident mushroom forager without fear of misidentifying poisonous lookalikes!

Have you dreamt about becoming more self-sufficient and sourcing your own fresh, local ingredients?

Do you want to start sustainably foraging so you can become healthier and happier?

Have you thought about harvesting wild mushrooms but afraid you won’t be able to tell the edible and poisonous species apart?

Then this book is for you!

Save money and enjoy the delicacies that nature has to offer. Mushroom hunting is easier than you think, and less dangerous than everyone assumes.

Wild plant foraging is increasing in popularity with celebrity chefs and small cafes jumping on the bandwagon and using locally foraged produce in their food.

There are so many benefits of foraging to your health (physical and mental) and even the environment!

In Fearless Foraging in the Rocky Mountains, you’ll discover:

Over 40 species of mushroom you can harvest all year round

Complimentary access to the mobile-friendly Digital Field Guide that includes high-resolution photos and descriptions of all edible mushrooms and any toxic lookalikes so you don’t have to worry about misidentifying species

How to correctly create (and use) spore prints to help you figure out what’s what

An annual mushroom calendar so you can keep track of the mushrooms by season and make the most of each foraging season

Detailed descriptions of the anatomical properties of fungi - gain the essential knowledge you need to correctly identify species

Tips on sustainable foraging - and ways to increase the natural mushroom count for next time you visit!

And much more!

Foraging is a tradition upheld for centuries by indigenous people who used ancient, respectful principles to live off the land. Connect with that history by embracing the artful skills and knowledge to confidently collect food for your meals.

Even if you're still worried about toxic mushrooms, let this guide reassure you. Included are incredibly high-level descriptions and details to use so you don’t get it wrong. NOTE: To keep it economically prices, our paperback version is printed in black and white. Premium color is available in our hardcover version. Both will provide the quality necessary to identify wild mushrooms and plants and both come with access to the full color, high-resolution Digital Field Guide.

If you want to learn the skillful art of foraging mushrooms and enjoy nature's nutritious bounties then scroll up and click the “Add to Cart” button now.

end description

wild harvest publications... no named author? i n t e r e s t i n g

"To keep it economically prices" hmm *the design is very human meme*

this book that promises highly detailed descriptions doesn't even have color images unless you pay a premium

"Mushroom hunting is easier than you think, and less dangerous than everyone assumes." hmm. hmmmmm. yeah the government definitely put out those 'if you don't know what it is don't put it in your mouth' PSAs for no reason

tldr don't buy foraging guides off amazon if you can't locate a human author and verify their credentials yourself

[thesherrinfordfacility]

okay let's get them hard truths out in the open following episode 6, bearing in mind that i am in the UK and am therefore chronically sleep-deprived, and have watched the Feral Domestic™ maybe only like oh 7 times:

crowley is as much at fault as aziraphale. they are both as bad as each other. their own individual idiosyncrasies are literally the other's emotional downfall and if im honest im not entirely sure there's any way they can adequately move past it.

waxed on and on and on about it, but aziraphale's issue is not that he has any allegiance to heaven. he doesn't at all, and that is obvious in his initial reaction to the metatron, in that he essentially says that he knows his place and it is not Up Above. it is right there in the bookshop, and with crowley (even if he didn't consciously think it that explicitly at the time). he doesn't want any part of the heaven that it currently is, he has had enough and is tired of trying to be the angel that hides who he is and what he wants from his existence. that much is very much clear.

but the mantra throughout most of life is to be the change you want to see in the world. look at the major societal issues that are happening in the world today; people are rising up and fighting for what is right, and what they believe in, and wanting to make changes. now look at this opportunity that aziraphale has been given. regardless of the questionable motive of the metatron offering it to him; if you were in his position, could you say you'd find it easy to refuse that?

the issue here with aziraphale is that he (again, ill harp on about it until the cows come home) thinks that crowley - this demon that isn't a good demon because he is good and kind and gentle - would want to have his place in making that change happen; be by aziraphale's side whilst they create the world and heaven that is different from the largely shit one they've always known, hated, and feared. this is where the Pedestal comes in; like i said before, aziraphale has now been confronted with the fact that this demon, his best friend and love of his life, is acting in the way he's always acted but that aziraphale refuses to acknowledge... because to acknowledge crowley's shortcomings (which ill discuss in a sec) would be to question aziraphale's faith in him, and mean falling from the pedestal that has been aziraphale's status quo for the last few thousand years at minimum.

edit: this also needed adding because it touches on aziraphale's tendency to hold himself superior to crowley, which he also does in the Domestic scene.

crowley's issue is twofold. one, he cannot move on from the fall. second, that he is sometimes a manipulative and childish shit. the first is obvious, and his recent experiences with heaven have only compounded this (ie his conversation with gabriel/goob, where he lays into him about gabriel's part in the cruelty shown towards aziraphale to the point he almost makes goob kill/injure himself). crowley can also however be incredibly cruel borne out of his own pain. there were major hints in s2 that not only did crowley fall (no matter what the metatron says, im still not convinced he fell for only asking questions) but he fell from a great sodding height that in his mind should have made him untouchable. my thoughts on morality in heaven have already been discussed, but that must have had a huge impact on crowley; it is no wonder that it's a sore point and he feels bitter, resentful, and angry.

in the above context, id want nothing to do with heaven either. but crowley doesn't communicate and im guessing that his feelings about the fall are a No Go area in terms of what he's shared with aziraphale... so for crowley to assume that aziraphale turned down the metatron is grossly unfair - how was aziraphale necessarily meant to know how deep his trauma (if we're applying human mental health constructs) runs? he isn't to know that at all - so it does track that aziraphale would think that crowley would want to help him make a difference so they don't have to keep getting involved in the toxicity that is the heaven/hell politico-moral dichotomy.

what also upset me about the Domestic was the kiss. i loved it for what it was in isolation and it was a long time coming, and a huge movement in the dance they constantly have with each other, but it was in essence manipulative. i realise crowley was on his last emotional straw and yes, perhaps the love and devotion got too much for him to contain... but he literally just stood there and heard aziraphale tell him that he wanted crowley and he wanted them to be together. there were no qualms at all that aziraphale loves him as much as he loves aziraphale. so, what was the kiss meant to prove?

to my mind, it was manipulation; specific, a temptation. whilst very romantic and 'sweep him off his feet with the violins playing', it was also non-consensual and unwarranted on crowley's part - to the point of being derogatory and redundant (lets be clear: not a criticism on Neil for adding the kiss, im purely talking about crowley as a character and his Choices here). there was nothing to prove, nothing that that kiss could have possibly convinced aziraphale to do. so the only thing that leaves, imo, is that it was a temptation. crowley does not typically use temptation in this way, or at least that's the impression ive had throughout s1 and s2, so he chooses now is the time? to tempt aziraphale into staying with him? of course he does!

he's desperate, but also childish and immature and completely ignorant of what aziraphale is actually saying to him. aziraphale never denied him; aziraphale wanted him in this opportunity exactly by his side as he always has been. but that didn't fit with what crowley wanted, so he tried to make aziraphale bend to his will. aziraphale says the fatal words "i forgive you", but if he has (as i suspect he has) realised that crowley was trying to manipulate him... well, id probably say something as damning to crowley as 'i forgive you' too.

when aziraphale said 'nothing last forever', i realise crowley took that to mean him and the life that they built together, but it obviously wasn't that at all. aziraphale is saying that they have eternity ahead of them, that he wants to spend it with crowley, whatever has to end around them (ahem the world? apocalypse from s1, anyone?). aziraphale demonstrated consistently throughout s2 that he is trying to give crowley his own agency where heaven/hell are concerned (paraphrased but: "I want you to help me but if you don't want to, you are free to leave"). crowley however seemed that he was constantly one foot out the door in case things got Too Much (which, you know - valid) but aziraphale really did his best to make crowley not only not feel suffocated but also that crowley was wanted. and for anyone that is a tough balancing act.

the two of them have had 6000+ years of Not Really Communicating. this is the detritus that remains when they don't, and it was absolutely needed in this season. for them to break apart and break in and of themselves. s3 needs to be where they learn more about themselves than each other, and stop believing that the other is infallible, because such thinking - worship, blind faith - only ends badly.

[daftmooncretin]

rip to rian johnson but star wars sequels would be way better if ben solo was just kinda cowardly and han solo coded so he defected from the jedi and went to be a fun swashbuckling anarchist space cowboy instead

and finn and poe have to find him and try to convince him to come back to the rebellion but hes afraid who he is and what he could become

also instead of luke trying to kill his nephew for NO REASON (so insanely out of character it boils my blood) he just realises after ben dips thats hes not cut out for teaching. and is living on a mandalorian colony as rebellion liason/ambassador with chewie and sometimes lando i guess (din djarin is there) he aids the rebellion (because of course he would fuck that plotline) but he wont stay on the rebel base because he doesnt like all the chosen one clout and mandalorians are very chill and mind their own business

han and leia are still together and play active parts in the rebellion because fuck that plotline too although they do disagree about the ben situation (leia is annoyed and han is understanding) poe and ben childhood friends and for what.

in this au, rey is raised in the empire and is a sith lord but she has doubts and isnt as abjectly disgusting as kylo ren because of course not. (appears slightly too interested in the rebellion when poe is captured and maybe??? possibly lets finn and poe escape but thats up for debate.) rey gets more evil over course of movies before turning to light for plot drama and a satisfying zuko arc.

force awakens timeline

prophecy that a new jedi will rise and take down the dark side. rey and sith lord (dk who but fuck snoke im writing him out) assume it is the missing ben solo (its finn and rey tho fr) and are intent on finding him. movie opens on rey being evil probably and capturing poe. also finn as a character actully needs no real changes hes great. and then next scene space pirate ben solo doing his thing (but without identity revealed so we dont know who he is yet he may go by kylo because funny)

instead of luke poe has a lead on missing almost-jedi before he dipped ben solo and is searching for him on leias orders.(rebellion also believe the prophecy is about him. but nuh uh) torture scene and escape scene doesnt need to change but show reys nuances and how lost she is.

in the interest of narrative poe and finn still crash on tatooine but finn manages to pull poe out of the crash. (finn still gets the jacket at some point because i say so) poe is too injured to fly so they seek out help and and meet ben solo who saves them from pirates or something idk. (but neither know who the other is)

finn and poe convince ben solo to be their pilot still thinking hes a random smuggler named kylo. they get along very well, especially finn and ben. rey by this point is tracking their whereabouts

they end up on that lightsaber planet and ben gets the weird darth vader nightmare and freaks out, (hes afraid of being evil or something idk) poe is getting suspicious now also finn feels the force and takes up the lightsaber. rey comes and finn trys to hold her off. finn get hurt and drops lightsaber. ben is forced to take it up and his identity is revealed as rebel reeforcements led by han and leia arrive and they see him fighting. rey and ben have a weird charged moment (yes i guess i am still making reylo a thing but its reyben now and its woke so shh) and in a dramatic desperate effort he manages to knock her lightsaber away with the force. poe crawls into a plane at somepoint and blows up reys ship. the rebels destroy the stormtroopers but rey captures finn and escapes in a stolen ship.

ben has a oh-shit-i-said-id-never-use-the-force-again related existential crisis which makes him freak out and leaves. a distraught finn-less poe calls him a coward. poe picks up the discarded lightsaber and the jackettm and sadly packs them up. leia tells him about the starkiller and poe volunteers to go on the starkiller and save finn. han and leia have a sweet moment and han decides to go with poe on the suicide mission, chewie goes too.(chewie arrived at somepoint i guess)

mid hostage situation finn blocks reys force attempt and shes shook up. he sees something in her (finn is a beautiful sweetheart) and he trys to appeal to her. she force chokes him and books it out of there. but it is clear she fears him a little. he escapes with mind tricks and runs into han poe and chewie on the deck. finnpoe moment fr. poe gives him his jacket back in order to get the keep it it looks good on you line.

meanwhile ben is back on his ship(i guess its the falcon?) and he thinks about finn and his mom and luke or something.. a dream maybe?? idk something emotional and motivational for his arc. and he goes to a box under the floor in his ship and pulls out a green lightsaber. he turns the ship around.

on the ship poe finn han and chewie are planting the bombs and escaping when they get stopped by stormtroopers ordered by rey. poe is about to be shot by a big droid thing when it is cut in half by ben wow big reveal hes here oooo ah. rey is shot in the shoulder by chewie and angrily orders more stormtroopers. they cant take them all. han sacrifices himself by blowing up the bridge. he tells finn and poe to find luke in the mandolorian colony ben is distraught him and han have an emotional goodbye he tells him to tell leia he’s sorry and that he loves him and he proud of him then he makes chewy get ben out of there and he blows himself up. leia senses it v sad rip man but he had to die to intensify plot drama

rey chases them onto the ice planet and another weird charged moment. mind link established??? this time ben is too angry and grieving though so its not a good match and she wounds him real bad all over hes v scarred now. poe shoots at rey and throws lightsaber at finn. he gets ben onto the ship and finn and rey have the big force awakens show down. finn uses the force v powerful all that jazz the good guys get away. on the ship finn mentions how he felt a connection with rey to poe and claims he sees good in her

movie ends with meeting luke on mandolore. ben is very traumatised wont really speak to finn or poe and avoiding luke. finn returns lukes lightsaber and rey has doubts movie over. movies ends with ominous rey ben mind link

final notes (on first movie and overarching rewrite plans)

finn

finn is the protagonist of this movie so it would be much more character heavy on him them the original. more in depth on his stormtrooper trauma, how he always chooses the people he loves over the cause and his reluctance to join the rebellion. his friendship with poe and the han/leia parallel’s especially. relationships with han and ben important for his character exposition and he plays a key role in supporting both rey and bens character progression. possesses the strong sense of mercy and kindness at the heart of the star wars franchise.

rey

rey is raised in the first empire and does not know anything different. when she meets finn who was able to rebel and escape from the same system she is trapped in she becomes plagued by doubts and projects all of her hatred and resentment onto finn to compensate, but it is clear she fears him. to escape from her doubts she fixates on finding and capturing ben solo imagining him to be a frightening and terrible adversary. however when she meets him they see eachothers minds, and she sees how plagued by doubt and fear he is, how he runs from everything and he sees her too. they connect and develop a strange mutual fascination/understanding. this is put askew by finns appearance at the end of the movie in defence of ben. reys fear of finn increases when she sees the true extent of his power. she fears and hates equally finns strength of character and easy goodness and by extension hates ben for his alliance with finn. she blames finn for “taking” ben from her.

ben solo

kylo ren is a disgusting blight on the star wars names so ben solo is being completely reclaimed by me into a different character because i fucking hate that stupid pretentious eboy. instead ben solo is an incredibly han solo coded character with a heart of gold and deep love and loyalty to his friends and family. his main weakness as a character in this rewrite is his fear and lack of self belief. ben is terrified of being a jedi and of his own power. he fears his own nature and was so afraid he would become his grandfather that he ran from the jedi altogether. ben solo is a runner that wont face his problems, he runs from the jedi and from his parents to avoid failing or becoming something terrible. finn and ben recognise the need to run in eachother (although important distinction finn runs because he doesn’t want to fight for a cause. and ben runs because hes afraid he will be the reason the cause fails) and ultimately encourage eachother to break the cycle and stand their ground (well finn motivated ben in this movie, finns not fixed yet.) Bens arc in these movies is about learning to live with his own nature and fighting for what he believes in despite his fear. also dealing with mommy issues (ben is kind of jealous of poe and leias relationship the son she wanted or something blah blah blah etc) and being a malewife to his murder girlfriend. his job is kind of to support and fight with finn and later rey and help them save the world

finnpoe (will be a gay couple)

their friendship will be front and centre in these movies because they represent duty vs personal loyalty. poe puts the cause above all else and values his own life and personal relationships little. finn on the other hand is disillusioned with establishment cause of stormtrooper trauma and wants to protect himself and others from it. poe is the first person that finn truly bonds with and loves. he puts poe above everything, including being a jedi and the rebellion. this leads to a lot of fighting and discord between finn and poe as finn doesn’t understand how important the rebellion is to poe and poe doesnt get why finn is trying to protect him from it. ultimately though poe teaches finn faith and belief and finn teaches poe to accept love and value himself. (also many hanleia parallels) the two of them are the harbingers of a new age. poe as future leader of the new republic and finn as the jedi messiah or whatever. in terms of romance, im thinking slowburn. baity first movie, kiss at the end of the second and established relationship by the halfway mark of the third.

also when rey eventually joins the light in the beginning she refuses to talk to ben (cause of romantic drama i havent thought of yet but centres around some sort or betrayal in the second movie) or finn (because hes her narrative foil and slow burn best friend forever) so her first friend is poe and she kind of follows him around in her first few months before she eventually bonds with finn 4eva. her poe shadowing has lots of cute friend moments where they fly together and he tries to talk her down about finn and the ben drama but also more importantly it foreshadows her leadership ability and tactical mind as she gives him advice and aids him with the rebellion behind the scenes (also leads to leia taking rey under her wing probably because poe is her surrogate son and mirror) which will eventually lead to her and poe leading the republic together because in my mind rey is a jedi but actively a member of republic government because ben can’t do politics and finn won’t but shes great at it so she’d be a perfect jedi liason and vice president to poe. meanwhile finn and ben lead the jedi. finn as a knight travelling across the galaxy and ben as a teacher. (luke is happy in retirement rn on mandalore but leia is still probably an advisor in the republic because retirement is definitely not for her) and everyone is happy the end. force ghost han solo is clapping.

[dr-spencer-reids-queen]

Shrouded Mysteries

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Princess!Reader

Word Count: ~1.7k

Warnings: none

Summary: More of your mysterious past comes to light as the search for you is on. Your "uncle" is making sure that you don't get found out and sent back to your home country. If only you can tell Spencer the truth instead of lying to him.

Play Pretend Masterlist

Square Filled: slowed heartbeat for @mfbingo

Author’s Note: any and all comments are appreciated <3

x

Spencer practically bounces into work on Tuesday morning. You have not left his mind since taking you out on the impromptu lunch date. He’s honestly never met anyone like you before which is why he’s so enthralled with you. He thought it was a bit weird that you didn’t know how to eat a cheeseburger but who is he to judge? He doesn’t know how to do a lot of things and often gets judged for it.

Derek walks out of the break room sipping his much-needed coffee when he sees Spencer at his desk. JJ and Pen follow him out of the break room and chuckle at the smile on his face.

“Why are you all smiles this past week?”

“Nothing.”

“Spit it out, kid. Who is she?”

“Why do you assume it’s a she?”

“No one makes a man smile like you’ve been smiling more than a woman.”

“Is it that girl you went to see the other day at the coffee place?”

“Okay, now I gotta know about her,” Derek grins.

“It’s nothing. It’s new. I don’t even know what we are or where it’s going to be. I just had lunch with her that one time.”

“What’s her name?” Penelope asks, sitting down at Derek’s desk.

“I’m not telling you.”

“Spence, we’re not going to stalk this girl.”

“I am. What’s her name?”

Spencer knows he’s not going to win this with three of his coworkers ganging up on him.

“Y/N.”

“Let’s look her up, shall we?”

“No, don’t do that.”

It’s too late. Derek and JJ are huddled around Penelope as she types quickly. He sighs and walks around them to see what she pulls up. He’s curious since there is such mystery surrounding you. Penelope finds an Instagram profile that matches the name Spencer gave her.

“Is this her?”

“Yeah.”

At face value, you look like a normal American girl. Spencer detected an accent in your voice that you were trying to hide. Besides that and not knowing how to eat a cheeseburger, you seem perfectly normal. Your Instagram shows it, too. You have pictures of you on the beach, in the mountains, in parks with your dogs, and traveling with friends and families. Someone who has experienced life to the fullest.

“From what I can see, she has two brothers and one sister and she really likes surfing, playing piano, and hanging out with her family.”

“Check her Twitter,” JJ says.

“Okay, no, you’re done. Enough stalking her.”

Spencer gives them their moment to tease, and Penelope chuckles before exiting out of Instagram.

“It’s good to see you happy, kid.”

Spencer takes a seat at his desk to get to work but he can’t get you out of his mind. Don came to visit you while at work, and your manager gave you permission to take your break earlier. You and Don are sitting outside where there aren’t any customers because it’s getting hot. No many people are walking outside so Don thinks it’s perfect to have this conversation here.

“Here, I got you a new cellphone. Don’t worry, they can’t track it.” You open your mouth to speak but Don shakes his head. “Don’t ask.” He takes out a small ID and hands it to you. “Here is your new driver’s license. I also did you a favor by creating social media accounts for you with pictures that my friend helped make. Everyone in this day and age has some sort of digital footprint. It would be weird if you didn’t have it.”

“Thanks.”

Your heart starts to race a bit from how nervous you are and you can’t help but fiddle with your fingers underneath the table. You look at the people passing by across the street and immediately smile when you see the one person who you can’t get out of your head. Don sees the smile and turns to see Spencer walking over to the Coffee Shop. Your heartbeat immediately slows down because you feel safe with him. You’re not sure why since he’s a stranger to you but you feel like you can trust him.

“Hi, Spencer,” you grin.

“I’ll see you at home,” Don clears his throat.

He leaves just as Spencer gets to the table. He takes the seat Don was sitting in and watches him walk away.

“That’s my uncle.”

“Where are your parents?” Spencer asks and turns back around.

“Away. They’re out of town for work. They won’t be back for a while.”

“What do they do?”

You’re not prepared to be interrogated mostly because you never did your homework on this new life. You should have on the plane ride over here, but you were too busy researching the history of America to research yours.

“You know, work. It’s complicated. They do so much.”

Spencer chalks it up to you wanting to be private so he respects that and moves the conversation along. It’s weird since your Instagram shows you being your family and he thought that meant you were close with them.

“What are you doing here?” you ask.

“I wanted to see you.”

“Here I am,” you smile. “Oh, I got my new phone. Can I give you my number?”

“Yeah.” Spencer takes out his phone and hands it over to you. You input your name and number into his phone before handing it back to him. He immediately calls your phone so that you have his number. “Listen, I also wanted to ask you if you’re busy this weekend.”

“I shouldn’t be, why?”

“I’d like to take you out if that’s okay.”

“Like a date?” Spencer nods shyly, and you give him an encouraging smile. “I’d love to. Where are we going?”

“Now, if I told you, it wouldn’t be a surprise. Don’t worry, I think you’re going to love it.”

“I’m excited,” you grin.

“I have to get back to work but can I stop by at lunch and take you out again?”

“Yeah.”

Spencer grins and leaves the table right after. You watch him walk off with a happy sigh. This… this is everything you’ve wanted. The quiet peaceful life with someone to look forward to every day. It might be boring in some people’s eyes but it’s everything your old life can’t give to you. You think back to your parents and how worried they must be not knowing where their daughter is. You want to feel bad for what you did but if you feel bad then you’ll feel guilty and guilt leads to you going back there…

Yacleira. Home to your nightmares.

Your mother, Calliope, paces the throne room anxiously while your father, Elliot, sits on the throne overlooking the enormous room. Calliope is almost in tears because, for the past week, she and her husband haven’t been able to locate their only daughter and heir to the throne. They have searched Yacleira and every crack and crevice she has but you’re nowhere to be found. That means you must be in a different country but they’ve contacted Spain, Saudi Arabia, Norway, and England but none of them have seen or heard from you.

Elliot already had his time to explode in anger for letting his daughter get away but now he’s calm with silent rage. Not only is he very protective of you, his daughter, but also the future queen of Yacleira. Without you, they will have to find a new bloodline to take over the throne and that is not going to happen. Your family has been reigning for half a century and it’s not going to stop now.

“Calliope, darling, please quit pacing. You’re making them nervous.”

She looks over at the Harringtons of Vosharia. Felix, Cecelia, and their son Henry who was meant to be married to you had you not run off to play house in another country. This arranged marriage is a way of connecting the two countries to keep their alliances strong without issue. People in Vosharia are trying to overthrow people in Yacleira mostly for their land. They’re both small but very powerful countries and one will not give up their land for the other. This marriage is a way to unite the two together to become stronger. Henry has been quiet about the situation but his parents are ever so vocal about being made fools at the altar.

“Do you realize what will happen if word about this gets out? The outroar both of us will have to endure?” Felix asks angrily.

“We’ll find her,” Calliope says.

“You better because if you don’t, you can kiss that peace treaty goodbye. We will be at war,” Felix glares at Elliot.

“You have made your point, Felix. We do not need your judgment at a time like this,” Elliot glares back. “I suggest you go back to Vosharia and wait for our word. We will find our daughter and she will wed Henry. The deadline isn’t due for another six months.”

“Sweetheart, we should just go. You’ve made your point,” Cecelia says.

“Fine. We will come back in exactly one month hoping for progress.”

With that, the Harringtons leave the building, escorted by their own guards. Calliope is worried about the state of her country but she is worried about you more. Where could you be? What are you doing? Are you in danger? Did you leave because you had to or because you wanted to? The Richmonds don’t have enough time to rest because their head of security, Kylen, enters with your personal bodyguard who has been assigned to you since birth, Benjamin.

“Did you find her?” Elliot asks and stands up.

“No, sir. I figure if anyone can find her, it’s Ben.”

It’s true. Sebastián knows you better than you know yourself. If you were planning on leaving the country, he’d know about it or know where you’d go if you managed to sneak by him.

“You’re sure you don’t know what happened?” Calliope asks.

“No, Your Majesty. I was away when she escaped. She knew me just as much as I knew her. She knew when I’d be away from her.”

“Find her, Benjamin,” Elliot glares.

“I will do everything possible to bring her home to you.”

He knows you fled to the United States because he’s the one who put you on the goddamn plane. He just doesn’t know where. He made it clear to Don not to tell him where you were for this exact reason. He’d do anything to make you happy even if it means escaping from everything you’ve ever known.

x

Want to be tagged? Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[balteredsworld]

cha cha chase, gregory house

🥼🩺 | house finds out you're a dancer.

tags! house being house, fluff of sorts? house x reader def

。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°

"aww that's cute," house tilted his head in amusement, eyes twinkling with signature mischief. you were going to hate this. in fact, you were already dreading it. "we can all give foreman a lap dance."

you rolled your eyes, prepping your dearest ex-friend's arm for a transfusion. "did you have to say all that?"

"what? people should know you were a dancer, especially with a boss like that," she sweetly and very innocently shrugged, before looking at house with pride. "she's got killer mo—"

"—alright!" you jammed the needle roughly, shutting her up. "you'll fall asleep in right about... now."

she dozed off, but not before catching you with a triumphant frown about your lips. oh you were pissed, at least she didn't need to deal with it until after the treatment.

you would've cooled down by then. but you were also in trouble. why? because of that stupid grin house had on his stupid face.

"so you used to dance."

"and you used to walk."

"ouch. low blow!"

"i can blow even lower." the words left your mouth sooner than you could think.

"you definitely have the knees for it," house chuckled, practically looking up into heaven with an extremely exaggerated grateful look.

"shut up. don't ask."

his brows shot up, face contorting a theatrical face of an innocent. "how could you assume the worst in me!"

"my bad," you deadpanned. "i think it's just your track record with insanely inappropriate jokes."

you slipped swiftly out of the room, keen to get house off of your hair. but for a cripple, he was insanely fast. this man could do more than he let out, but that was only to make people like yourself, his victim-of-the-day fellow, miserable.

house was a smart man, but his aptitude was used for the worst. nothing was a viable escape, he was going to hold this over you until the day you die.

"i ask first," he snarked, making a gesture with his finger. "uhm, i have something inappropriate to say. can i say it?"

you glared at him over your shoulder. he was hot on your trail. if only you could get to the flight of stairs quicker.

he blinked all cutesy, innocently batting his lashes as you two turned the corner. "were you a stripper?"

you threw your head back, eyes rolling back to the point it felt like someone was gauging them out. house looked excited at the prospect. even if you weren't, close enough.

finally, you turn to him with an unimpressed purse about your lips and an angry furrow to your brows. house towered over you, all but amused at your well invited and justified anger. he thought it was cute.

"so?" he cocked a brow, still twinkling in mischief.

"answer's no," you half-calmly answered, titling your head, formulating a wicked idea.

you grabbed house's wrinkled collar, standing on your tip toes, snaking your hand on his shoulders.

"but i am a dancer," you whispered, mustering a sickeningly sweet voice. you trailed your fingers along his neck, letting your breath fan his ear as you crooned your head slightly, just as how you would with your dance partner.

some part of you had a daring inkling to knock his cane over, still unnerved over his shenanigans that last christmas he duped you into getting him a pricey gift.

fortunately for house, you weren't him.

but you maintained your hold on him, before letting out a hum at the same time you descended back to the soles of your foot. an innocent smile creeping on your lips, lashes batting the same way he'd done seconds ago.

"that's right, dancer..." house trailed, with a gaping mouth, still in a childish drawl.

"doctor, actually. the id says m.d., but thanks," you remarked nonchalantly, whipping away in a spin to dash into your escape. "you hired me remember?"

"because you had nice legs!" house shouted in a last ditch effort to win, seemingly paralyzed on the spot. "and even nicer knees!"

you had outrun him for now, although you knew it wasn't long before he revived into an ever meaner bloom. and you were right to dread it, because hours later, house was sitting with a triumphant smirk about his face. he somehow found a video of you dancing embarrassingly online, no doubt with the help of lucas, and forwarded it to any and all.

that only strengthened your resolve for revenge. house was fucked, but he welcomed your challenge.

who knows? maybe he could just get a lap dance out of it.

[dizscreams]

I have accidentally deleted the draft for this fic two times bro 😭 BUT ANYWAYS I LOVE THIS IDEA SM GRIFFIN

Guess Who — Amber Freeman ★

PAIRING: Amber Freeman x fem!reader

SUMMARY: Amber gives you a visit as Ghostface. It leads to stuff ;) and the next day she wonders if you’ll keep what happened a secret

WARNINGS: SUGGESTIVEEEE!! I got carried away with this. Ambers just so fine and I love this idea so muchhh ugh 🤭

You said goodbye to Tara as you left the hospital room. Ghostface was back and wasted no time in attacking Tara, one of your best friends. They fucked her up pretty bad and you were the first to visit her in the hospital. Tonight wasn’t really out of the ordinary but it felt off. You couldn’t explain it but you felt like you were being watched.

You walked out of the building and were immediately hit with the cool air. It was a chilly and quiet night. You hated Woodsboro at night because of how silent it was. The small town already felt haunted because of everything that has ever happened here but at night it was a different level of scary. You shivered as you began walking to your car.

You don’t know why but you had an unsettling feeling, you just had such a strong feeling that someone was following you. Maybe it was because of the attack. You told yourself you were just paranoid and got into the car. You looked in the mirror checking to see if any unwanted guests were in the back seat.

Once you were sure you were safe and in the clear you began driving home. You found yourself thinking about Tara, she was all you could think about in the last 24 hours. You didn’t understand how someone could do that, how someone could be capable of stabbing her that many times and breaking her leg, or what would motivate someone to do something so brutal. And you had no clue who did it either. Tara was extremely well liked at school, there wasn’t one person who hated her.

You pulled in your drive way and began walking to your front door until you stopped dead in your tracks when you heard a bush rustle behind you. You quipped around only to be met with nothing. Just the wind, you thought. Not wanting to be outside any longer you quickly unlocked the door and stepped inside. “Hellooo? Anyone home?” Your voice echoed through the house as you shut and locked the door behind you.

You walked towards the kitchen and saw a note on the fridge.

Out, will be back tomorrow. xoxo -mom

You sighed as you opened the fridge and grabbed a soda. You didn’t want to be alone right now but maybe watching a movie would help calm your nerves. You were already a jumpy person to begin with and living in Woodsboro didn’t help. You loved scary movies but you didn’t like being in a scary movie.

You popped open your soda can as your phone rang. You grabbed your phone out of your pocket, assuming it was your mom calling to check in or something. Your eyes widened slightly as you were met with the No Caller ID on your screen. Deciding to be smart you hung up muttering a “fuck that” and made your way to the couch.

You sat down and turned on the TV as you put your drink on the coffee table and began switching through different channels. You decided on one and began to relax. You were just going to have a chill night watching movies and probably finishing up homework.

However the night had different plans as your phone rang again making your stomach do a small flip. Groaning you grabbed your phone and hesitated before answering. “Hello?” You said as you cringed at how small your voice sounded. “Hello.” You were met with that deep and unsettling voice, the voice you’ve heard in the stab movies, the voice you knew was Ghostface. Or maybe it was a joke? Maybe it wasn’t them?

“Who is this?”

“Who do you think?”

You gulped before checking your screen again, the No Caller ID staring back at you. You tried your best to sound confident as you put the phone back to your ear, “I think you’re unoriginal.” The voice chuckled in response to you. “And I think you’re dumb. Don’t you watch scary movies? You’re not supposed to answer the phone.. especially when you’re home alone.”

You stood up from the couch so quick you stumbled. Were they here? Could they see you? Fuck, this couldn’t be happening. “What do you want?” “I want you. I want to play a game.” “What kind of game?” You couldn’t believe this was happening. Maybe you should call the cops or text somebody. “Hmm just some horror trivia. You answer correctly and you get to live, does that sound fair?”

“I’m not sure anything about this is fair.” You quipped back as you started texting the group chat, ‘Ghostface is calling me call the cops’ but the voice on the other line interrupted you. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you. If you hit send you’ll be dead before the text goes through, understand?”

Your eyes widened and started to well up with tears. With your shaky hands you click out of the text app. “What do you want?” You said with your voice breaking slightly. “I told you.. I just want to play a game. It’s real easy I promise, we can even do a practice round.”

“Horror you said?”

“That’s right.”

“Okay..” you were pacing your living room trying to look at every place this asshole could be.

“Good girl. Who was the killer in Nightmare on Elm Street?”

“Um it’s Freddy- Freddy Krueger!”

“Correct! See? You’re going to do great at this. Question 1-“ you shook your head, “What? No, I got that right it should count-“

“I told you that was a practice round now shut up. Question 1.. who is the final girl in Halloween?”

Fuckfuckfuck

“I cant- i cant think on the spot-“

“Aww come on you know this. I know you do, baby.”

Baby?

“Lauren? Laur- Laurie!! Laurie!”

“Last name?”

“Fuck I don’t know- I don’t know!”

“I’ll tell you what.. guess who I am and I’ll spare you.”

“What?”

“You heard me.”

“You’re sick” you said as a few tears fell from your eyes.

“Is that your final answer?”

You could practically hear the smirk on their face. “No! No it’s not, asshole. Um..” you started to think about your friend group first. “Liv?”

“Wrong.”

“Fuck um Mindy?”

“No.”

You throw your head back with a groan “Chad!”

“Nope. I’ll give you two more guesses..”

There weren’t many options left and you had a feeling you knew who it was.

“Fuck you.” you muttered

“One more guess, sweetheart.”

“What? That didn’t count and you know it!”

“My patience is wearing thinnn.” They said in a sing songy voice.

“Wes?”

They hung up and you heard a noise in your bedroom. With your legs trembling you slowly made your way to the kitchen to grab a knife but before you could make it someone ran up behind you. They turned you around and pinned you to the nearest wall. You tried to scream but they quickly put their hand over your mouth while the other was pinning your hands above your head.

“Shh baby I won’t hurt you I promise.”

The voice changer wasn’t on and you recognized the voice immediately. “Amber?” She laughed and took off the Ghostface mask. “Hi” she said with a sweet tone while she slowly moved her hand from your mouth. You must have looked stupid with your mouth practically hanging open.

“Wh- I don’t understand-“

“You don’t have to.”

You’ve had a crush on Amber since middle school and had met her through Tara. You and Amber had always been extremely close but you never thought the feelings were reciprocated and you never thought she’d do something like this. She wiped the tears that were currently falling from your face. “Don’t cry pretty thing, I don’t want to hurt you.”

She lifted up your sweatshirt and lightly trailed her knife up and down your bare skin. You slightly shivered at the contact of the cold weapon while she grinned sinisterly. “Why me? Why Tara? Why are you doing this?” Your voice was barely above a whisper and she answered back in the same tone, “I’ll tell you later but right now all I want is you. Can you be good for me? You don’t know how long I’ve wanted this.”

You didn’t want to admit how turned on you felt right now. It was wrong and you knew it but it was her and she actually wanted you. Maybe you could fix her or something or maybe you were just being selfish. You didn’t want to think about the guilt in the back of your mind and just tried to enjoy whatever would happen.

“I’ve wanted you too” you told her with your voice still soft and hushed. “I know. So will you let me? It can be our little secret.”

Our little secret.

You eagerly nodded and with that she kissed you roughly. You wasted no time in kissing her back and she put her knife back in her pocket so she could grab your neck to pull you closer. She dropped your hands and you put one hand on her waist while the other got tangled in her hair. The kiss was messy but it felt so good. In a twisted way it felt right, even given the circumstances.

She led you to the couch and lightly pushed you so that you were now laying down while she got on top of you. She smiled and pulled away from you so she could admire you below her. “You’re so pretty, you know that?” She went back down to peck you on the lips before she started kissing your jaw.

“Was supposed to kill Tara at the hospital but you just- you distracted me, baby. Jus’ had to follow you. I need you. You need me too don’t you?” She made eye contact with you and you let out a small ‘yes’. She laughed before going back to kissing your jaw and making her way to your neck. She started kissing and sucking while you let out small noises of approval.

God, it wasn’t right. If Tara ever found out she’d hate you but you just couldn’t help yourself. It was a secret, a secret you intended on keeping. “Can I take this off you?” She asked while tugging on the hem of your sweatshirt. “Yeah yes please” you nodded. She smirked and you raised up so she could take it off. She threw it across the room and kissed you again while feeling up and down your body.

Your grip on her waist tightened as she lightly kissed your neck again before going to your collarbones. You got squirmy and impatient and started murmuring ‘please please’.

“You gotta be patient okay? You’ll get what you want I promise” she told you while kissing down your chest and stomach. She made her way to the waistband of your pants and started playing with it.

“You didn’t mean to be so rude to me on the phone, right? You were just scared.. scared I’d kill ya? I couldn’t bring myself to do something like that, you’re too special.”

Your hand was still playing with her hair “I didn’t mean it I promise.”

“Good.” She grabbed your jaw forcing you impossibly closer to her. “And you can’t tell anyone about this, understand?” “I understand.” She smirked before tugging off your pants.

-

The next day you and your friends were at school hanging outside around the picnic tables. Chad and Liv walked towards you guys bickering about a find my fam request and you couldn’t help but giggle at them. Amber gagged and made fun of them for not having sex yet and your eyes widened. You glanced at her to see her eyes focused on you and you quickly turned away.

Last night flashed in your mind and you started playing with your hands. You felt guilty now knowing Amber was apart of the killings but you didn’t regret what you did. And that made you even more ashamed.

You snapped back to reality when Wes was rambling about how to protect yourself and Mindy started talking about who the killer could be.

“The way I see it, the killer is probably one of us” she said while gesturing to the group. Everyone looked at each other and you tried your best to avoid eye contact with Amber.

Amber noticed the bruises on Chad’s arm. “Hm Tara said she fought back hard, you’ve got bruises.”

“Yeah, from football practice!” Chad responded with a nervous chuckle.

“And where were you Amber?” Mindy asked with a raised eyebrow. She looked at you a moment before responding, “I was with y/n.” She said with a small smirk and looked back at Mindy.

“Huh, is this true?” Mindy asked and now everyone’s eyes were on you. “Yeah, yeah that’s right.” It wasn’t a lie! You were with her, you just didn’t mention how she was actually Ghostface.

And with that everyone moved on from the subject. Wes got a text that Tara was awake and everyone got up to go visit her at the hospital. Amber let everyone walk ahead before pulling you to the side. “Thank you for keeping our secret” she said with a chaste kiss to your head and a smile before walking away.

You were in love with a murderer

tags: @griffinskittles @tsukkismolerat

[bipanicoverthegravessiblings]

Can we have Andrew and Reader have a life after the events of the game (In the Bulletless Decay route)?

Reader would be an exchange student who would have gone to stay with the Graves family, but in the end she ended up being another 'victim' of the game's circumstances.

She would be a type of person who was indifferent to almost everything, cold-blooded, with somewhat sociopathic tendencies but with a kind heart.

Okay, let's do this, after Ashley's murder, Andrew and Reader finally got fake teeth and moved somewhere far away, but with all the recent traumas and along with the fear of being abandoned.

Andrew started to have possessive tendencies, a little clingy, toxic, manipulative towards our 'poor thing' Reader and that would result in them having children in the future, to keep her trapped in the coffin with him.

I assume you mean “Fake ID” but sure!

TW: Implied Trapped Pregnancy

Decay!Andrew x Reader

Ashley wasn’t the only person to die that night

With her went Andy and LeyLey

And the Andrew you had fallen in love with

It felt like looking at the zombie of a loved one with him. Glimpses would be there, you’d see it when he smiles- when he reads poetry- when he clings to you as he’s haunted by his actions

But other than that….it’s like he’s a husk of his former self

Given all that’s happened with you two, it was only smart to move far, FAR out into the country

Aside from the visits into town to get groceries, you both rarely interacted with anyone

It was for the best in your opinion

Neither of you were functioning enough for society after what you’d been through

Indifferent is how you always felt after you two killed Ashley

If Andrew was a zombie, you were a ghost; mindlessly wandering the mortal realm without a semblance of a soul or consciousness

Though you were still there

You disliked the one day of the month you came here. Though the only inhabitants of this town were rednecked bumpkins whose only concern with you and your husband was that you attend church, they still made you uneasy. You were just waiting for the rug pull, the one person in a crowd to call you both out for everything.

In your mindless state of inspecting an apple, debating if you should grab a bundle, you felt a tug at your side. You perked up, turning to look at who needed your attention, only for your eyes to go down at the child standing beside you.

A little girl. Eyes wide and a bit puffy from the tears that had formed in the corners. As you silently stared at her, she looked like she was about to cry again.

“I-I’m sorry Miss…” she voice was squeaky and pathetic, she ran her hand over her nose as she sniffled, “I thought you were my mama..”

You felt a pang in your heart, which was a rare occurrence for you. Against your better judgment, you set the apple down and took the little girl’s hand.

“I’ll help you find her…”

The kind hearted exchange student that arrived at the Graves Family all those years ago wasn’t fully dead…she still lingered

And that scared Andrew

He was so scared for you, so worried something from you two’s past will come back to hurt you

You couldn’t leave him, no. You just couldn’t.

He’ll protect you

He’ll make you stay with him

Andrew held on to you tight as you slept soundly, your back pressed against close his chest. He kept track of your breathing, it grounded him when he was alone with his thoughts like this. You were his anchor, the only think keeping him from floating away.

Which is why he had to do this.

Andrew drove people away, if not they were taken from him. He drove Julia away, Ashley took away Nina, and then you both decided Ashley needed to be taken away.

Though the dangers were gone, there was the chance of a vengeful demon creeping out of hiding for getting rid of his ‘favorite tar souled mortal’. The chance people would find out and separate you both. The chance you would leave him eventually.

He couldn’t have that, he couldn’t bear it.

He lowered his head to your bare shoulder, planting a gentle kiss to it. His hands ran over your stomach.

“I love you Y/N…”

[iisasarcasticlittleshite]

Honestly id love to see barb and dia react to dragon mc

"I see, so that's how this happened." Diavolo beamed joyously, even as Lucifer told the story with his usual enthusiasm. "What a remarkable transformation you've gone through, MC!"

"Indeed, quite the poised little creature." Barbatos' words carried an amused undertone at the dragon perched across Lucifer's shoulders, front legs folded in a manner one could only describe as refined.

It's not unlike the way MC will cross their legs when sitting in on these meetings as a human.

"I came to ask if you had any solutions in mind, not to watch you marvel in at this predicament." The first born scowled. Yes, MC paints rather the adorable figure as a dragon, but he wants his human back.

As if sensing his distress, the dragon on his shoulder let out a purr, gently moving their tail to wrap around his tie, a quiet reminder that it's still his human behind those eyes.

Diavolo's eyes tracked the movement, and his smile only grew. "I'll tell you what, we'll keep MC here for a day or two so you can hunt for a solution yourself, without concerning yourself with their safety with your brothers."

Lucifer sighed, a combination of MC's gentle touch and Diavolo's reassuring tone easing the tension in his shoulders. The dragon sank with them, and chirped happily.

"That's assuming they'd be any safer in a castle full of haunted objects and giant snakes."

"I assure you, MC will come to no harm here." Barbatos said sincerely. "If we cannot aid you in reversing the transformation, we can at least keep them safe for the time being."

Lucifer nodded to himself as MC slid from his shoulder to his lap, looking up at him questioningly. They have been impressively well behaved thus far, he doubts it would last. They have a gift for mischief, all the more reason to have them returned to normal as soon as possible.

"Very well, I entrust them to you, Lord Diavolo, Barbatos."

Lucifer curled a finger under their chin, bringing those big eyes up to his, rubbing their cheek with the pad of his thumb affectionately. "Behave, I'll pick you up tomorrow, understand?"

A playful chirp was the only response MC could give him, but it was enough before they leaped from his lap onto the table between he and Diavolo, careful not to disturb any of the dishes set out for breakfast with their wings.

Lucifer left then, on his way to RAD for the day, leaving Diavolo to marvel at the fully formed little dragon now blinking up at him curiously.

"Well, you seem to be quite comfortable. Would you like to sit on my shoulder? I noticed that's how you move around with the brothers."

He'd seen MC for the first time on Satan's shoulders, tail tucked loosely in his collar to keep them stable as the fourth born picked his way through the busy halls of RAD, and again now with Lucifer.

MC yipped and spread their wings, taking off smoothly, without disturbing a single dish, and landed firmly on his left shoulder, careful not to dig their claws in.

Diavolo let out a booming laugh. "Amazing! Learned to fly already!"

"MC has always been a quick study when motivated, Young Master." Barbatos added, watching fondly as Diavolo beamed with pride when MC settled across his shoulders, undisturbed even when they shook with laughter. "Do try not to get too distracted, young Master. You still have work to do."

Diavolo deflated almost immediately. "Yes, I know."

"Perhaps it would be best if MC accompanied me for the rest of the morning." He shot the dragon a look, and they immediately took off from Diavolo's shoulders, fearful of that look turning into a glare. Daring as they may be, even MC doesn't fuck around with Barbatos.

They took a sweeping ark about the gazebo, enjoying a slightly longer use of their wings. They'd barely flown further than across the main room in the House of Lamentation, and were looking forward to the space in the Demon Lord's Castle.

Barbatos allowed them to test their wings while they shadowed him through his regular duties. For a human turned dragon, MC is surprisingly graceful, skilfully avoiding any collateral damage.

"All of this flying around must have you hungry, MC. Shall we take the young Master his lunch? I'm sure he'd love it if you shared with him."

MC chirped, leaping from the kitchen cabinets to his shoulder, having been scolded for landing on the counter when the stove was on.

They rubbed their cheek affectionately against Barbatos, and that's when he noticed...

"Is that...dust?"

MC's eyes widened, eyes snapping to the particles forming the shape of their feet on Barbatos' immaculate shoulder.

Dread had the dragon arching their back and pouncing away, landing on the floor this time. Barbatos arched a brow "You aren't in trouble, but seeing as you've taken such a liking to flying, you might be of use to dust the heights if the castle..."

MC yapped with objection, they knew exactly how massive the demon lord's castle is, and they also know exactly how much of a perfectionist Barbatos is. If he gets them cleaning, he won't let them stop until all the places he can't reach are immaculate.

Their wings will drop off by the time he lets them stop.

"Now now, it wouldn't be that bad." Barbatos crooned wearing that terrifying smile of his. "We'll just get some brief dusting done before the Master's lunch."

MC shook their head, scooting backwards out of the kitchen, and quickly skittering to a run, claws squeaking over the marble floors.

They don't need to look back to know the butler has followed them, so they quickly leap from a staircase and take flight, winding in and out of narrow hallways until Barbatos' presence no longer looms at the back of their senses.

They ducked into the library, the door slightly cracked open, and find a gap between two heavy volumes at the very top shelf.

The books here smell old, older than the ones in Satan's room. Some have waves of magic rolling from them, others whisper of times long past.

MC's sensitive eyes and hearing pick up on all of these things, marvelling at the many wonders of the Devildom.

They listen for Barbatos' approaching footsteps, little heart hammering in their chest until the silence dragged on for just long enough that they dared creep out, balancing precariously on the edges of shelves to read the spines of several books.

Eventually, they settled on a book that seemed to call to them, and carefully nudged the heavy, leather bound book from its place, using their wings to soften its landing on the hardwood floor. Carefully, they propped up the book, nudged open the cover, and began to read.

Diavolo would find them there hours later, after he'd convinced Barbatos to let him stretch his legs and search for MC.

It was an adorable sight, the dragon's tail curled under the book to prop it up, turning the place very carefully so as not to damage the paper with their claws.

"Managed to escape, did you?"

MC startled, the book slid to the ground with a smack before they realised it was the prince, and not his butler armed with a dragon-sized feather duster.

Diavolo chuckled lightly, careful not to let his laugh ring out too much for fear of being caught. He was under instructions to send MC back to Barbatos, after all.

The prince slid to the floor beside them, back resting against the shelves as he stretched his long legs out in front of him. "What are you reading?"

MC churred in relief, stretching themselves onto their feet as their joints ached from lying on the floor all this time. They pushed the book toward the prince, who kept it open as he read the spine.

"A history of human magic? I can see why you would be interested." He smiled, opening his hand invitingly for MC to rub their head against him, careful not to poke him with their horns. "You're awfully affectionate in their form, aren't you?"

MC's responding look had the prince laughing again. "Well, the floor cannot have been comfortable, and I hear you gave Barbatos quite the run-around. Would you like to come into my office? I'm sure you'd be more comfortable there."

The dragon whined, eyes darting around as if Barbatos was about to pop out of any corner. Human MC already dislikes house chores, he can imagine their opinions on dusting all the nooks and crannies the castle has to offer, especially when they're barely the size of a housecat themselves.

"Don't worry," He set their book in his lap and opened one side of his coat, "I'll sneak you in, he'll be none the wiser."

MC highly doubted that, but...they were tired, and the invitation of snuggling up to Diavolo while he worked was far too tempting.

Diavolo's heart fluttered as the little dragon crawled into his coat, curling up against his breast, wings tucked close to their back.

"Comfortable?"

The responding purr sounded sleepy, and he thought that just this once, he'd be willing to oppose Barbatos if it meant this little creature could stay so comfortable.

By the time the prince sat down at his desk, MC was sound asleep, the warmth of them seeping through his shirt, along with soft purrs and sleepy churring.

The prince went about his work with a contented smile for the rest of the day.

Part 4

@darkflowerav (Tagged as requested :)

[ifwebefriends]

TRIGGER WARNING: misogyny and mentions of transphobia and bigotry in the video above

Comic dub of this ace attorney fan comic by @runby2 with permission from the artist

Huge thanks to runby2 for letting me dub their comic! Please go support them, he makes great stuff! This is one of my favorite Ace attorney fan comics. I know the sound quality on my voice is bad and I said the wrong word at one point but I did my best. I hope I did it justice (no pun intended).

[Video ID. A comic by tumblr user runby2 vocally dubbed by tumblr user Ifwebefriends. It is a fancomic based on the ace attorney games featuring Apollo Justice, Klavier Gavin, and Kristoph Gavin. Apollo looks determined at the floor with his arms crossed as he says “Klavier, I have to tell Kristoph that I am trans. I know you said if he hired me he already knows but,,, I want to be honest with my mentor!” Klavier, standing next to him and looking worried, waves his hands and says “nein,,,, nein forehead,,,” Apollo looks worriedly at Klavier and says “wait is he ,, transphobic??” Klavier responds “nein,, it’s just,, confusing-“ Apollo says back “then I want to tell him, klav! I made up my mind!” Klavier responds “I’ll,, come with you,,,” The scene changes. Apollo looks determined as he says “Mr. Gavin!!! I have… something to tell you!” Klavier, standing next to Apollo, looks dejected with his arms crossed as he says “ah here we go,” Kristoph is sitting behind his desk and looks concentrated and confident with two fingers to his temple as he says “ah, Justice. There is nothing you can tell me that I do not already know.” Apollo points confidently as he says “well, actually sir, how about THIS?” He then grabs his bicep and looks concerned as he says “I’m transgender” with a voice crack. All three of them are silent for a moment. Kristoph says “but, you ARE a man, yes?” Apollo looks worried as he says “well- yes! … technically -“ Kristoph interrupts “no.” Apollo questions “I- ‘no ‘?” Kristoph clarifies “you ARE a man, Apollo.” Apollo smiles and says “I- !! Oh! Thank you, sir!” Kristoph continues “thank god you’re not a woman. I despise women.” Apollo looks shocked and dumbfounded. Klavier silently puts his hand on Apollo’s shoulder while Apollo looks confused. Kristoph continues “that is why I too, became a man.” Apollo, curious and emboldened, exclaims “wow! Wait! Mr. Gavin, you were born ‘a girl’ too?” Kristoph responds “no. I was born a man. Keep up.” Apollo looks even more confused and Klavier looks away disappointed as Kristoph continues “I chose to become a woman to fully understand what it was like to become a woman. i choose my fate, justice. then when i fully understood what it meant to be a woman, i became a man again. that is why i am the best defense attorney, because i have conquered all gender and i fully understand what it means, to be both a misogynist and hate men. NEVER. assume you know more than me,, justice. i chose you for a reason.” Apollo replies “what abt nonbinary ppl,,” Kristoph looks smugly to the side before saying “‘nonbinary’… hahhah… Justice,,, do you SERIOUSLY think that I am a man, RIGHT NOW?” Kristoph turns to flash a smug smile with two fingers by his eyes as he says “i am more than a man and a woman. I identify as a man solely to fool the idiots who do not understand the spectrum of human existence. i chose YOU, justice, because you understand what it means to become more than what you were born as. I, right now, am a god among men. My gender has evolved past that of a simple male, or a simple female. I understand the binary and I use it to my advantage. I have both joined and fought against the bigots that run this government, yet they could not track me as I did so. I have handled what you understand as the gender binary and distorted it like a fine clay. That is what it means to be a lawyer. Do NOT forget that, Justice.” An endcard comes up that says “comic by @runby2 dub and sound editing by @ifwebefriends End ID]

[kuni-is-daddy]

Comfort!Wanderer x Female Reader

Tw: Hints of depression. If you don't know scaras backstory ur gonna get spoiled.

Ft: Teasing,f/ngering, Riding, Scara praises u, aftercare?,he calls you a good girl

Wordcount: 1.77k

CW: Minors do not interact past the cut! This is a NSFW post

ScaraMasterlist

Before you two go on another outing, 'Hat guy' reluctantly asked nahida for help on another one of his gifts to give you...

"Remember hat guy! if anything happens ring the safety bell, okay? And keep in touch while im at vanarana. I want to make sure you two have an awesome time!" The small archon tippy toed, while 'hatguy' leaned down as she tied the trinket to his feathered ornament. "Tsk- Buer, im far from a child. I dont need anyone to hold my hand like one." Nahida looked up at the puppet, "Really? you never mind ms Y/N holding your hand though." He diverted his gaze and mumbled to himself. "See? I knew you'd like it. Oh right! your gift!"

Hat guy fixed his posture, "Here! Make sure you give this to ms y/n." In her hand was a book of photos she put together for him with little stickers of slimes and aranara with smiley faces, handing it to hatguy as he took his time with each page and noticing the many 'new' pictures, some being ones he didn't give to the lessor lord. "Your a stalker now too? I guess reading minds isnt enough for you." Ignoring his comment buer took out another book. One titled 'Nahida's sumeru travel guide' with a cover drawing of a purple cat barely paying attention to the light green cat. "Do you have to insist on making everything look like a coloring book..." Nahida didnt reply, mearling looking away and humming a tune similar to the aranara while he began his walk to the park.

Whenever you two would hang out together it was in the library within the akedemiya or anywhere he chose. Sometimes as you held his hand walking through the peaceful park your mind would fill the silence in the worst ways possible as he stared at your now frowning expression. "I dont know Kuni, is the akedemiya even worth it anymore? Theirs people smarter than me there anyway." Kuni stopped in his tracks. "But isnt the whole point of the akedemiya just to major in a 'hobby' you like?." he raised an eyebrow. "Well..i guess..but..Theirs obviously people better than me at it." "Id disagree. Besides their Irrelevant. Shouldn't you just do it and have fun. Huh.. I thought thats what hobby's we're. Something for idle bodies to enjoy." You sighed at his response and sat on the bench. "Its not that simple kuni, I have to get a job and- my family what if i have to provide for them too. Ontop of that there really unfair. Why am i putting my heart into this just for it to be a flop." 'A flop?' At your wording he was brought back to his association with the kaedehara clan. Every now and then he'd overhear niwa talking with others over its upending struggles due to the rise of his mothers sword art. Spreading around inazuma like wildfire and Leaving the clan to struggle in its contribution to the arts. But only in a matter of time kuni was able to 'eat' and drink his favorite tea with them in celebration of their success. We're all the struggles just the divine tricks to see who is worthy? was a god playing tricks on you? 'It couldnt be like that..' Kuni put his gift on the bench, and held your hand while sitting with you

"Maybe im overthinking kuni..I-i just dont know.." It pained him to just look at you like this. Tired. Just so tired mentally and physically, tears dreaning down your eyes as you measly sat on the bench. You began to get up, Remembering your responsibilities. "Its fine kuni, you know- maybe I just need some rest! at home!" 'she said that before' He held your hand, uncomfortably tight. His mind always thought to the worst and he never wanted to loose you because of it. Often getting angry at himself for assuming you'd do such a thing..or likewise to what he did. But this time, He just couldnt let go. Was he scared? As much as you implied, you'd never do such things It always rang in the back of his mechanical ears. If only he was still a harbinger, He would've did everything in his power more then he could now to get you the stable income or whatever humans would need in any region or place in teyvat you wanted. Just say the word and he would've done it regardless of her 'excellency' but he couldnt now, all he could do was use this 'curse' which he called emotions to help understand you. "Kuni-...Please let me go....Im alright." you sniffled. He immediately noticed your change in tone. It was soothing just how you always talked to him yet he still felt wary.

With a few more tugs it felt as if his grip only tighter the more you tugged. In defeat, you brokenly sighed and sat back next to the puppet. A part of him was irked at your own confusion. But he never once regretted trying to comfort you through it when, and when you didnt ask. Even awaiting you at your home before you messaged him. It felt as if you sat in the park for hours within cold silence as your throat and chest burned trying making out words but every attempt was cut off by insecurity.

You always knew he loved you, but even your black and white reality began looking different colors. You shuttered while looked at him again, meeting eyes and Surprised that his hat was off. Resting on the bench's crook. "How about..I join the akademiya with you?" you let go of his soft hand, beginning to wipe your eyes until he pulled a green cloth with flowers printed on it out his pants pocket, Damping away your tears as you subtly smiled and sniffled. "I never knew you we're into cute things like this kuni." 'cute?' "Well. You can always rely on this..unique archon of yours to make her presence." you didnt ask any further. "Why do you want to join the akademiya?" "Isnt it obvious? to be with you. and for buer to stop annoying me." he mumbled the last part. "But you dont even have a major or-" "The archives of inazuma can use a rework. I find it ironic how beelz- the raiden shogun is portrayed as some. Beneveloent god, that pursuits eternity." He smirked, Writing a thesis might be one of the most indirect ways he could show up his mother but that had to wait.

You we're more important, and always have been since you entered his life. Kuni noticed his gift. "Oh yeah. Here." he handed you the bag. "Whats in it. More bitter tea for me to try?" he blushed at your answer. "Just open it." you smiled at him again and looked at the pictures in the book. Trying to hold back a laugh at the picture of nahida whacking him uptop his head for god knows what. He looked at the picture, intrigued on why you we're laughing. 'buer you had one fucking job-' then back at you again. "No need to thank me- i-" cutting him off, you kissed kuni on his cheek "I love it kuni." 'his skin is so soft~' you thought. "Then I guess I should thank you too." The puppet shifted closer to you moving the book back in the bag and out of your view behind him. "W-wait kuni- not here we're in a park!" he sucked his teeth and still moved closer to you, sinking his face into your neck as you leaned back "And? thats even better, every person here can know how important you are to me. Got a problem with that?." He began tugging at the buttons on your shirt "Or..Does my baby want to continue this at home? I'll let you choose this time."

----

You fumbled with the keys as you locked the door behind you. Kuni was already tugging onto you. Biting and leaving petals of kisses along your neck. "K-kuni~ slow down.." you moaned. "Shit..Love it when you say my name too. This beautiful body is all mine." you turned around to face him, being greeted by his kimono barely hanging onto his shoulders to cover his lean form behind his turtleneck. "Your staring again…Like what you see y/n? Its all for you." He picked you up, bringing you to your bedroom littered in papers, pens and books on your desk. "huh. Do all scholars have a messy room like this?" He chuckled. "S-shut up.."

Kuni laid you onto the bed, observing your body before trailing his hands down to your pants. Letting out a groan. "God. Your fucking beautiful. How dare you treat yourself like this." He slowly tugged your clothes off. Then rubbed his hands along your thighs, spreading your legs and revealing your wet slit. "You want it gentle baby?" you nodded. Sinking his head inbetween your legs, he began licking on your bud. "Kuni~" "Shh…Relax..for me pet." your thighs twitched at the name. "Oh? you like being called that too…ill- mmm~ remember that" he sunk his tongue inside of you, moaning into you incoherent praise. "f-fuck..you- mmm taste- s' good." you rubbed your hand through his hair. Pressing him farther onto you. Usually you didnt take the lead or have him bottomed out for you like this. But it was your special night, as many we're yours to come. Kuni didnt want to stop for celestia itself to make sure you felt loved just as you made him feel. "Wahnt me to stop baby- you- ah..i know you like it." "N-no kuni~ please dont stop." you said while pressing your thighs closer against his head. "Hah..How about my fingers, want that too?" Kuni licked at his fingers after pulling away from your wet hole with a gasp for air. "Yes master~" his cock twitched in his pants. He knew you wanted it slow but god the urge to take you right then and there. He inserted two of his fingers as your walls clenched, slowly shifting in rhythm of his fingers. "Arent you eager hmm? Already want me inside dont you? Thought you wanted me to be gentle." He smiled, Thrusting his digits faster inside you. "K-kuni!! please.. I- ah..hah.." "Yes baby? what does my good girl want." kuni leaned down to you, wanting to hear your delicious moans. "Inside..Please..want you inside~" "Hah..Theres my pet." The two of you switched positions. Kuni laying his lean body on your bed as you climbed ontop of him, slowly sinking him inside you.

"K-kuni..your so big," "And hah..your so warm..oh shit~." You began moving, bouncing up and down on kuni's length. "Oh god baby..L-look at you, bouncing on master so ah-well.." His praise filled your ears, making your body heat up. You two interlocked hands as you both chased your highs. The sound of skin slapping and your wet moans echo'd around the room. "Yes..Yes y/n- fuck yes. I L- ah.. Love you so fucking much, dont stop. dont stop." He squeezed onto your hand, eyes slightly glowing from his pre sloshing up and down inside you. "Kuni~ m' close..Im gonna- i-" "Thats it- just like that- cum for me~ let me hear those beautiful moans-" From his bittersweet praise you came onto his length, squeezing his hand 'tightly' as he soon came after you, Painting your walls with his warm seed. You collapsed onto his chest, Still inside him and coming down from your high. His chest wasn't rising up and down.. which creeped you out a little but you didnt mind.

The two of you laid in the bed. Mumbling every now and then about earlier as he stroked your hair. "I dont expect you to get well instantly y/n. Thats not how things work." "Yeah..Then i guess id be like some sort of puppet right?" you chuckled while trailing your hand along his chest. "Right.." kuni laid his head back. "What im saying is that you have to try at your own pace to get better. Regardless of everyone, its your life you have to live. And i..hate seeing you dwelling here when I know there's someee things your good at. If you get discouraged, I'll be there for you." "And if your not..?" he sighed at your reply. "That'll be rare. Then Call me and we'll go for another walk if you want. Im sure that childish archon has plenty ideas too."(He thought back to the bell). Some of his advice was stuff you've already heard. Even though it is easier said then done your heart warmed at his ideals. He even wanted to get in the akedemiya just for you, he was willing to do so much. Even if you felt better for a day or made the smallest progress Kuni would be proud.

Thank you for reading and I wish you the best :)

[hazshit-hotel-hater]

Insomnia and allergies are killing me (they aren’t anymore cause i wrote this part a week ago) so prepare for a bunch of Angel Dust facts that no one needs to know about and Vivziepop will probably end up ignoring!

Some of these are headcanons and some of these are canon facts so they will be colourcoded as such! Headcanons will be blue and canon facts will be red. Anything that relates to real spiders will be listed with a 🕷️! Some of these will also get a little doodle from me

Much like an average spider, Angel can feel and sense when storms are coming. These freak him out and will make him curl up on the ground.🕷️

Angel is sensitive to vibrations and especially sensitive to stronger ones like lightning and earthquakes. (Hell does not have earthquakes.) Stronger ones make him paranoid and nauseous from his organs moving around.🕷️

He definitely needs glasses to see far away but doesn’t bother since it hardly becomes an issue in daily life.🕷️

Jumping spiders change how they see btw! Less light = more detail, More detail = less light.

Vision Examples:

He can also see behind him but I don’t have that angle so this is the best you get

Sleeps curled up.🕷️

Also follows lasers! Not in the same way a cat would, but any interesting movement in his peripheral vision will cause him to turn toward it to see it better.🕷️

Can see ultraviolet light.🕷️

Dresses up Fat Nuggets on Halloween. And basically every other day. Seems to have a preference for the witch hat

Owns a skateboard??

Why do his eyes glow pink why can he do that on command

Can dialate his pupils at will I guess

Molts. Basically like shedding but if you also had to scrub a chunk of your skin off. Lasts 1-2 days.🕷️

Occasionally yells at his brother on the street

Currently still under the impression his sister is alive. She also probably found him after he overdosed.

Struggles to keep track of time

No idea what half the letters in LGBTQIA+ mean

Recently learned what a pride flag is

Angel has small retractable hooks/claws inside his palm that he can use to hold onto surfaces.🕷️

Angel hates people crying around or on him and will push them away or distance himself.

Examples:

Angel is very skittish around fire even though it cannot hurt him.

Hates the smell of citrus fruits.🕷️

Angel has two fangs (primary for injecting and liquifying food) on the roof of his mouth, much sharper papillae in the back of his throat and a second set of venomous fangs near the deeper in his throat that are to inject larger food and paralyze it but there is the rare occasion where the fangs stab his own throat and he collapses for a few hours after getting the fangs unstuck and he just lays there until it wears off and it kind of looks like he's dead cause there’s probably blood in his mouth but hes fine /hj🕷️

This is more of a food safety precaution. If he ate something live he would inject it with venom if it wasn’t dead yet, but he does not do this so these fangs are basically pointless and he might as well just get them removed at this point

Angel DOES have lungs! I know this seems like a very basic fact but some spiders have book lungs! Different from ours they don’t breathe the same way we do, just like how spiders don’t have blood like humans. This is me being a nerd, but we have seen that Angel has mentioned his lung capacity and he has the ability to cough as seen in Episode 5 (I think its 5 dont quote me on that) This means he cannot have book lungs since if he did he would not be able to cough, nor would he be able to sneeze or hiccup.🕷️

Angel is likely right handed in his top pair of hands, left handed or ambidextrous in his middle pair, and as for the bottom it seems like either ambidextrous or he just doesn’t like to use them for actions at all.

This is like half headcanon but also I pay way more attention to this shit than Viv does so Im basically right all the time

It doesn’t get super cold in hell Id assume, but on the rare occasion it gets colder or the AC in the hotel is on really high that is one of the few times Angel will use webbing and will wrap himself in it and crawl under a blanket and stay there. If it’s really cold or he plans on being in a cold area for maybe a week or month or so he might go into diapause to conserve energy, warmth, and food. (This can also happen when he has sudden sharp changes in diet and during daylight savings)🕷️

This will be updated again I can feel it in my bones. Hopefully this can satiate you all while I move house 🫶

[astral-cowboy]

Silly little lando norris smau (part 4)

Series Masterlist

Masterlist

In which streamer!reader does an interview and exposes some important news.

Is this an excuse to write a chuckle sandwich interview? Yes. Am i including Slimecicle in this despite his unfortunate departure? Yes. Is this the silliest thing I've ever written? Yes. Is it in script format because i can't be bothered to write an actual fanfic at the moment? Absolutely.

[transcript of the "Chuckle Sandwich" podcast]

JSchlatt: you know, I heard that you managed to turn Charlie into a cat? How…

Charlie: (laughing) how did you… do that?

Y/N: it wasn’t me; it was my boyfriend.

Ted: your boyfriend, hit formula one driver, Lando Norris?

Y/N: mhm.

JSchlatt: wow…

Charlie: you think you know a guy…

Ted: and you just kept Charlie in your house?

Y/N: mhm, fed him three times a day. I mean, surely you remember this, Charlie?

Charlie: (laughing) yeah, multiple toys, got to drive my own race car, truly living the life.

Ted: in Monaco?

Charlie: in Monaco.

JSchlatt: welcome to chuckle sandwich, we have (your user).

[intro]

Ted: we have this segment we do with all our guests. The premise is, we all make up a piece of the sandwich, Charlie is the meat, ted is the bread, and Schlatt is the mayo. The question is, Y/N, is what are you?

Y/N: what am I?

Ted: what are you?

Y/N: hm… id say… maybe the crisps on the side.

JSchlatt: the crisps?

Y/N: chips

JSchlatt: ah.

Charlie: so, Y/N…

Y/N: Charlie…

Charlie: It’s been a very interesting time for you.

Y/N: like, in general or, like, specifically now?

Ted: I’m assuming he means recently

JSchlatt: don’t assume what he means.

Ted: I’m just saying!

Y/N: (laughing) it has been interesting recently, to answer your question.

Ted: moved to Monaco.

Y/N: I did.

Charlie: turned me into a cat.

Y/N: (laughing) that was Lando.

JSchlatt: had a child?

Y/N: oh shit! I forgot about that!

Ted: how… how did that rumour start?

Y/N: I have no idea; I just woke up to that post on twitter and a message from a very urgent Charlie asking what kind of toys the baby likes.

JSchlatt: any other reactions?

Y/N: Lando got a message from his teammate, Oscar Piastri, who was very… angry that he didn’t tell him… oh yeah, there were also a lot of congrats messages from the others on the grid as well. Neither of us knew what was going on.

Ted: I bet, it’s a very..

Charlie: very personal situation

Y/N: definitely. I… I knew what I was getting into, not even when dating Lando but with choosing this career.

JSchlatt: hmm, oh yeah.

Ted: so when people came up with this rumour?

Y/N: it was odd. I wasn’t as pissed as people would think, but I wasn’t exactly happy.

Charlie: and, just to give those who don’t know about your life, can you tell us who your boyfriend is, what he does, how you met-

JSchlatt: what he’s like in bed, everything.

Y/N: (laughing) my boyfriend is Lando Norris, he’s one of two drivers on the McLaren team in Formula One, we met via a mutual friend, Max, who invited me to be in a Quadrant video.

Ted: I’m assuming a different Max to the red bull guy

Y/N: different max, yeah. We hung out more because my friend Will, WillNE, umm, is now a co-owner of Quadrant, so when that stuff was being sorted which took… a while, umm, me and Lando talked for a bit about random stuff.

Charlie: and you then fell in love, or?”

Y/N: we flirted but neither of us really… were serious. We had kind of a friends with benefits thing for a while, but it ended when I got serious with my ex, so our relationship was very… rocky.

JSchlatt: did you know that he was a Formula One driver?

Y/N: Will had to be the one to tell me, I honestly just thought he was a streamer.

Ted: really?

Y/N: I hadn’t watched F1 since I was about ten and even then, I only really paid attention to the drivers when they appeared on Top Gear.

Charlie: Top Gear?

Y/N: British car show,, they had this segment called ‘the star in a reasonably priced car’ where they’d interview a celebrity and then have them drive around a track in something that would be considered a common car like a kia or something. I remember seeing Hamilton get the top score for ages but I’m pretty sure Daniel had it when the show ended.

Ted: are you close with the other drivers?

Y/N: I mean, I’ve talked to Oscar and Carlos a bit because… you know, but I wouldn’t say I’m very… close to them. Lando has his friends, I have my friends, it just so happens that some of those overlap. Would I like to be closer to the other drivers? If I’m being entirely honest, I’m happy where I am now.

Ted: now, you moved to Monaco earlier this year, what was that like?

Y/N: stressful, I couldn’t say ‘I’m moving in with my boyfriend’ but I also couldn’t keep the entire move a secret because then people would be like ‘why aren’t you streaming with James anymore?’ and start stupid rumours like they always do.

JSchlatt: what you did there was make people think you moved to evade taxes.

Y/N: that… (laughing) that is exactly what happened.

JSchlatt: but you weren’t.

Y/N: but I wasn’t.

Ted: you’ve been in the… public eye since you were a child

Y/N: I mean, I’ve been making content since I was… eight? Nine? Around that age

Ted: what would you say is the most stressful part of content creation?

Y/N: (laughing) how many people have you asked that question?

Charlie: too many

JSchlatt: far too many

Y/N: well, umm… I think the most stressful thing, for me at least, is the work life balance. Like many youtubers, I primarily filmed in my bedroom, its where my pc was set up and everything. I used to stream every day; I was… I burnt myself out. I was doing all of that as a full-time student with a part time job. I have since graduated and I’m not exactly employed anymore so I have a lot of time now but even then, I try not to stream every day.

Ted: and I don’t know how much I’m allowed to talk about this, please let me know if this is a breach of any plans or anything, but your newest projects…

Y/N: oh! Um… yes? Yeah. I can talk about it.

Charlie: to what…

JSchlatt: to what extent?

Y/N: I mean, if you upload this on the same day, I can talk about all of it.

Ted: … we can do that

Y/N: great!

Charlie: so, for the people at home, what is the oh so secret project?

Y/N: songs. I’ve been getting into music I suppose.

JSchlatt: good songs?

Y/N: id like to think so. I’ve been working with James Marriott, he helped me with the producing and everything. This, umm, three song EP, I suppose, is a collaborative work. I came up with the basic meanings of all three songs and then we worked on the lyrics and the track together.

Ted: and the music video?

Y/N: (laughing) the music video was done by some guy I know, does silly videos on the barbie cinematic universe, and ate an entire edible nerd’s rope by himself.

Ted: sounds like a handsome man.

JSchlatt: Final question!

Charlie: (laughing) oh god!

JSchlatt: would you rather have unlimited bacon, but no more games, Or, games, unlimited games, and no games?

Y/N: oh.. um… can I phone a friend?

JSchlatt: Lando has already answered this question.

Y/N: ok… bacon makes me feel kind of ill… and if I didn’t have games I wouldn’t have a career.

JSchlatt: great!

[Transcript End]

[yourlocaldilemma]

Golden thoughts {part 3} (ln4)

______________________________________________

lando norris x fem!sprinter!reader word count: 2.5k

part 3/? Part one, Part two, part three, part four

warnings: horribly translated french, jealous Charles

You turn your favourite playlist on shuffle in the background as you dance around the kitchen. You’re in a good mood. The last month had been scattered with very successful track meets and good progress in training. 

Nights like these make you feel all the more content to not be looking for a relationship. Spinning around in nothing but an oversized shirt and panties, singing along to your favourite songs, cooking what you want, how you want. 

You’d been independent and stubborn since the day you took your first breath, and sprinting had never changed that. Your training schedule made it difficult for you to spend time with people not that you had many people to spend time with so growing up you were on your own most of the time. Lots of people found it odd and many overstepped their bounds to tell you you should have a better social life, but you took the advice with a grain of salt. Maybe you should feel lonely, but you never did.  

You’re in the middle of slicing lettuce and singing to Sabrina Carpenter when your phone vibrates. Reflexively you swipe left to clear it but pause and pull the notification back once you see who it’s from. 

Charles never messages you on race weekends. You’ll text him good luck out of courtesy, completely aware that 9 out of 10 times he won’t respond until the race is well over with and he’s either drank, partied or cried the results to rest. 

The Face ID lock spins before the message pops up. 

The music reduces to dull thumping of a baseline as the three simple words glow on your screen. 

“Hey, it’s Lando”

Even though he had left you his number that night in Australia, you hadn’t texted him or made any effort to connect with him. You had typed out a hundred different messages a hundred different times since then but couldn’t bring yourself to send them as you fought yourself mentally over why, why in gods name you even wanted to send them in the first place. 

You could see that Charles, or Lando, or whoever it was, was still active on the account.  If this was Charles idea of some late night joke you were going to let him have it. 

“Prove it.” 

Not even seconds after the message delivers your phone is vibrating, showing you your face as it prompts you to accept the video call.

Your hair is still in a high ponytail from earlier and your face makeup still looks half decent but you’re not wearing a bra, and the thin T-shirt you’ve donned does little to hide it.

You position the camera so nothing below your collarbone is visible and accept the call. Lando’s face fills the screen, looking pleased with himself like a 5 year old who just made a crayon masterpiece. You can distinguish the trademark red of a Ferrari T-shirt in the corner above him. 

“Hello Y/N.” He grins like your name is the most interesting thing in the world.

“Hello Lando.”

“You never texted me. Now I’ve got a crazy Monegasque breathing down my neck like I’m trying to kill you instead of just talk to you.”

The words slip out of his mouth like it’s the most obvious and common occurrence for him to want to “just talk” with you.

“your only way of contacting me was calling me on Charles’ phone?”

“He and Arthur alike wouldn’t give me your number, instagram, or WhatsApp, because apparently they don’t trust me. Or they just doesn’t trust me with you, because for a reason conveniently explained only in French, they’re acting like they have a claim over your life right now. 

He narrows his eyes and looks up at the shirt which you can now assume belong to Charles. You see his ring clad hand reach down into the frame and pinch Landos neck until the skins stripped of its colour and is left white long after he pulls his hand away.

Rubbing his neck, Lando shifts before meeting your eyes through the phone. “So this is me asking why you had a month and a half to text me, but didn’t. I thought we were best friends now.”

You can’t tell if he’s joking or not as he stares at you through the camera waiting for a response.

“Don’t you have a race to be preparing for?”

“Don’t even try that,” he hisses, “You know damn well that tomorrow is only free practice.”

“Lando I’m cooking dinner right now can I call you back later?” 

“Call me back later on my phone, or Charles’ phone, who is now going to try to push me off the track this weekend?”

“I guess you’ll find out, won’t you sweetie.” The pet name you use sarcastically with friends slips out of habit but Landos eyes glint like diamonds and his grin widens until it looks like it hurts. He nods repeatedly like scolded child.

Charles reaches forward again, this time to take his phone. 

 “Jesus garde-le dans ton pantalon Y/N” *Jesus keep it in your pants

“Bon Dieu, calme-toi Charles.” *Good god calm down Charles.

“Il m'a raconté ce qui s'est passé en Australie!” *He told me what happened in Australia!

You switch to English again for Lando’s (who’s looking quite confused) convenience. “The last time I checked, it’s not a criminal offence to have dinner with someone. You’re the one who’s made it clear I should try to make more friends.”

“I didn’t mean F1 drivers.”

“Why does it bother you so much? You’re reacting like an immature toddler Charles.” He stares blankly at you, his eyes darkening into a deep amber and his neck tensing. “I have to go. Have a great night,” you deadpan before hanging up. 

~~

You fire Charles a short but supportive text after FP2 before pulling up Landos number hesitantly. Whether or not Charles is acting like he has a stick up his ass, he’s still one of your closest friends and you’d always watch race weekends. 

Typing and deleting more texts then you count,  you decide that, “amazing job today” seems about sufficient. It was true, Lando had done an amazing job today, setting the second fastest time across both practices. 

Lando: Why hello there

Lando: would have set purple if I had my braid

Your mind runs to the interview you watched in Australia where he still had the small braid tucked into his curls. You had assumed for your own good it was an accident.

Sent: The braid huh?

Lando: I know you watched the race that weekend. I got pole, driver of the day and second place

Lando: which is basically first place because my little Maxy is in a fucking rocketship

Lando:  it was cause of my braid

You can’t help but admire his innocent take on the properties of luck. 

Sent: I’ve seen how hard you work. I don’t think it was the braid Lando

Lando: it was the braid. I haven’t gotten within the front 2 rows or on the podium since. Coincidence? 

You’re not completely sure how to respond to his theory. Telling him it’s because dragging his car onto the podium is like trying to climb Mount Everest in stilettos, probably isn’t the best idea before FP3 and qualifying tomorrow. 

Your phone vibrates again

Lando: You could come over right now and give me another one. Could use the luck tomorrow. 

You smile at the message, feeling intoxicated by the determination and childlike happiness that radiates off Lando thick as honey.

Sent: I’m not coming over to your house at midnight to braid your hair Lando

Lando: tomorrow? 🥺🥺🥺

Sent: yeah we’ll see. Goodnight.

Lando: goodnight!

You fall asleep with your lips curved up into a small smile and thoughts overflowing with images of a blue eyed boy. 

~

You’d be lying if you said FP3 went well. Charles and Carlos both went into the gravel and Landos best lap time was a full 3 seconds slower than he made in FP2.

Lando: I told you the braid was lucky

Lando: believe me now? 😛

Sent: You’ll be incredible in qualifying

Lando: location sent

Sent: what?

Lando: drivers parking lot. I’ll meet you there with a paddock pass. Then you can give me my braid

Sent: Charles will kill both of us, never mind all the press.

Lando: fuck

Lando: right

Lando: meet me here in 20 minutes then

His account then goes inactive, not giving you the chance to decline his offer. The address he sends you immediately recognize as a very expensive part of Monaco. Google maps shows it’s only a 5 minute drive but instead of trying to hail a cab in the thin streets you decide to run there. 

The amount of bodies on the sidewalks makes it almost impossible to keep a solid pace as you follow the directions on your phone. The masses of bodies swirling around all seem to be going in the direction of the racetrack and it’s suffocating as the tide of people almost pulls you with them. Once you break from the crowds, the street you’re on is completely void of any human life. 

 A ping sounds through your headphones. 

“You’ve arrived at your destination”

A large metal gate stands 100 metres down the road from you, well kept greenery and perfectly spherical bushes bordering the newly laid road. Behind the gate are multiple large flats and hints of the ocean glitter behind the white houses. 

You glance around, feeling severely out of place surrounded by luxuries you don’t dare imagine for yourself. You scroll through your instagram feed leaning against a tree, liking your friends posts when you come across an old post of McLarens. It’s a picture of Lando on the podium in Australia, his tongue out and eyes squinted into the sun. Champagne covers his body and his face is printed by his balaclava. You once again see the braid you absently left in his hair. They had captioned the picture

“New tradition?” 

For a fleeting moment you let yourself wonder if they’re talking about the braid or the podium before being yanked back to the present by car coming up the drive. You can only imagine it’s Lando as the car gets colder and you see it’s a McLaren. A gorgeous McLaren. You watch him reach across the car to open the passenger door. It slides upwards with a mechanical efficiency you can’t help but admire. You make eye contact with him through the windshield. He waves one of his hands toward the seat, motioning for you to get in. 

The door clicks shut beside you and Lando drives a short few meters before stopping to unlock the gates. 

“And you were impressed by my hotel room,” You mutter.

He laughs, eyes glittering. “Nice to see you too Y/N.” he pulls up to one of the flats. The exterior is almost completely white, excluding the huge oak door and black trimmed windows. 

“Remind me what I’m doing here?”

He smiles at you with a tilt of his head, “Braiding my hair of course. Though I don’t have very long I told my team I was going to grab a hoodie.”

You can’t help but laugh, a real laugh, until small tears are forming at the corners of your eyes. Lando is smiling a small smile, watching you like there’s nothing else in the world worth watching. His eyes run over your face until you feel a blush bloom on your cheeks. 

He clears his throat and unclips his seatbelt before shifting to lay his head across the low centre console, to the point where it’s almost on your lap. His curls brush your bare knees making lightning tingle on the surface of your skin. His hair is much softer than you remember it being and the curls untangle easily as you run your fingers through them before you begin to braid. Landos eyes close gently and a peaceful smile slips across his lips. 

As you twist the strands around each other, it feels like the thousandth day you’ve spent time with Lando, rather than the second. It doesn’t take long to finish the braid and as you loop the elastic around the end he opens his eyes to look up at you. 

“Is it weird that it feels nice when you’re braiding it?”

You smile down at him with question.

“No. You’ve never had someone play with your hair before?”

He shrugs as best he can with the awkward position he’s lying in, making no effort to sit up.

You’re barely breathing as you begin to play with his hair, terrified of overstepping, but Lando smiles contentedly and closes his eyes once more, nestling his head off the console more and further into your lap. The intamimte tension has millions of butterflies in your stomach and heat growing between your legs. When Lando lets out a soft involuntary whimper you draw the line and untangle your fingers from his curls.

“You should probably get back to the track.” You whisper. He groans, pulls himself back up into his seat, starts the car and pulls out of the driveway, one hand on the wheel and the other running over his new braid. 

“Promise when the good luck works you’ll give me another one next time?” He calls after you as you climb out of the car.

“Sure.” You roll your eyes. “Pinky promise.” You stick out your little finger and he reaches across the car to meet it. His huge hand dwarfs yours as he intertwines your fingers. 

He smiles at you, “It’ll work. Just you watch.” 

You just grin back at him as you watch the car accelerate, the lights eventually fading away. The whole run home You’re in your head, replaying the otherworldly events that were the last 10 minutes.

When you get back to the hotel there’s still 3 long hours until Qualifying. Surveying the mess of track clothes and suitcases scattered across the room, you make the executive decision to spend the time packing for your early flight tomorrow as the sun shines bright honey light through the windows. 

~~

Lando puts it on pole. 

By a whole fourth of a second. You watch the post-quali interviews with a haze of pleasant, but extreme surprise, and Landos head seems no less in the clouds than yours as he repeats the same approved script of answers to the different reporters.

Your phone vibrates less than 3 minutes after the drivers leave the media pen. 

Lando: I told you

Lando: want to come over?

You can’t believe your eyes. You’d never made such fast, whatever you two were, with anyone in your life.

You know Lando can see you’re still active, and his typing bubble keeps popping up and down like he’s deciding whether or not his offer was too much.

Lando: to re-do the braid of course

Sent: You’re ridiculous. 

Lando: thank you. I’ll pick you up in an hour.

[danikamariewrites]

can i please request a dark azriel x dark reader where she is a serial killer and he is one aswell. Reader is a huge fan of azriels work, so much so that she recreates his murders. It gets his attention bc he’s like

” huh? didn’t I already so this last week? ”

but it’s reader and she’ll do whatever it takes for him to notice her. Her stomach flips when she hears there is a new murder from her friends. She is so inlove with his style and grace. Her eyes sparkle and her heart beats fast when she witnesses his crimescenes. The style, the execution, the precision, the flaunt. She has to have him. She doesn’t care what it takes, he’ll love her no matter what. Neither one of them knows the identity of eachother, they just know eachother as fellow killers. Azriel knows someone is recreating his kills when he is asked to investigate another scene he already did. He comes up with a plan to catch whoever it is and to kill them before it raisea anymore questions. He finally catches reader after laying a trap, he takes of her mask and is shocked to see madjas righthand healer. No wonder he could never figure out who was murdering people. Reader covered up her tracks in a scientific way. She pulls his mask of too and they just stare at eachother.

”…”

”…”

"well this is new."

" out of all people, i'd never assume it was you."

" i’ll take that as a compliment azriel"

" you do that sweetheart. do you wanna team up instead? I was going to kill you actually, but i'm so happy it's you."

” god i’ve waited so long for this moment, the fact that it’s you makes it all so much better. And we’re together now. Idc what you say az, i’m not letting you go that easily, i don’t care if i have to lock you up. You belong to me now.”

” I could say the same for you, i’ve finally found someone to share my life with. Id you think i’m seriously letting you leave me then you’re insane. ”

😍 and they say romance is dead

The Killer

Azriel x reader

A/n: this is perfect anon I hope you like it 😊

Warnings: murder, death, slightly nsfw at the end

Azriel was sick of this copy-cat killer. He was going crazy over these murders. It didn’t seem like they were going to stop any time soon either.

He was going to catch the male responsible. These were Azriel’s murders, done in a precise and personal manner. And he’d be damned if this kept going on.

They always struck precisely a week after Azriel did. And Az knew exactly where this killer was going to strike tonight.

—

You crept through the shadows up to the warehouse side entrance. Pulling down your mask, making sure the ends of your long hair were concealed, you quietly pushed the metal door open.

On silent feet you made your way to the guard station. You were hoping that tonight was the night Azriel

You knew how he killed. What his MO is. You’ve studied the bodies he’s cut up and maimed with Madja. Being a healer gave you a steady hand making it easy to recreate the murders. Though you it was hard to capture his graceful slashes, you tried your best.You prayed that it was enough to get his attention.

You knew the details would drive him wild. That he couldn’t resist not knowing who was behind this. You were always at the crime scenes after the body was discovered. Azriel would be there too and you could feel the pride coming off him. You could see how pleased he was with his work.

When it came to your crime scenes however, you could feel his frustration and confusion. When you turned your back on the Shadow Singer and General you’d smirk to yourself. Knowing Azriel was one step closer to being yours.

Approaching the guard station you crouch and poke your head around the corner. To your shock and surprise the guard was already bound and gagged on a chair in the middle of the room. He was struggling against the tight binds. The male spotted you and stopped. Looking at you with wet pleading eyes.

Tilting your head you stand, cautiously walking over to him. “Curious. Who got to you already?” Stopping a few feet away you sense movement behind you. Looking over your shoulder you swear the shadows move.

Just as you had hoped, Azriel stepped out of the shadows. He’s just so dark and dreamy. His tall frame towered over you as he strode over to you, his large wings flaring slightly to intimidate you.

You didn’t cower from him. You stood tall facing him. Azriel gripped the back of your neck pulling you almost flush to his chest.

You didn’t say a word as he ripped your mask from your face to reveal your devilish smirk, a wicked glint in your eyes at the look of realization in Azriel’s eyes. “I’m-I…I didn’t know you had it in you sweetheart.” A smirk slowly spreading across his lips. “Hi Azzy.”

“We’re you doing this for my attention?” His voice was deep and dripping with male pride. “Took you long enough.” You pushed closer to Azriel so you were chest to chest. Your arms wrapping around his neck. The Shadowsinger complied, nuzzling his nose against yours.

“Before I knew it was you I was going to kill you and this male. But now I wanna see you in action.” Your smile widened and Azriel dropped his head to your neck, nipping and licking at your pulse point making your heart beat faster.

Azriel lifts his face to your pointed ear, his heavy breath tickling your skin. “What do you say we team up from now on, hmm?” You swear you died and went to heaven in that moment. “Yes, gods yes.” You pulled his face to yours for a kiss. You bite his lower lip with a small giggle.

“You’re mine sweetheart. I’m never gunna let you go. There’s no running from me, we’re going to have forever together.” You pulled him into for a real kiss this time. Heated and full of the pent up love you have for him. It was desperate. You grabbed at each other practically crawling into his skin.

Azriel pulled away, turning you so your back is against his chest, holding your jaw gently. You both stare at the guard who’s now panicking again. “Let’s take care of him. Then, I’m going to take you home and take my time with you sweetheart.”

You moaned, grinding your ass against his cock. “Yes Az. I’m yours forever and your mine. You’re never ever going to get rid of me.” Your nails dig in hard to his arms, attempting to leave the first of many marks on him.

Azriel lets go of you landing a smack on your ass. “Go ahead sweetheart, you can go first.”