#when i do this vastly depends on how happy i am/when i find work in something history related

[strawberrywindow]

i'm not changing my major again, i need to stick with SOMETHING 💀, but i've been really feeling the pull towards mortuary science again. i couldn't stick with medical because its too much about business and not enough about providing care and i'm worried i'd wind up feeling the same way in the funeral industry and get burned out again 😪

BUT it is still something that will always fascinate me. i don't know. i'd still very much like to go to school for it and am heavily considering doing it one day, def not anytime soon tho. like who cares. i knew a guy that told me once that getting degrees in a bunch of different things isn't useful for getting good at one thing but uhhhhh i guess i don't really give a fuck about that. i just want to be happy. and getting a degree in mortuary science even if i never get fully licensed as a mortician is definitely something that would make me happy 😂

[sitp-recs]

20 Harry-centric fics to read this month

What better way to celebrate Harry’s birthday than revisiting (or discovering) Harry-centric fics? If you feel like taking a deep dive into his character, here are my suggestions: short and long stories exploring his emotional arc, inner struggles, past trauma, sexual liberation and of course, his feelings about himself and about Draco. I couldn’t resist including some Draco POV fics because I love learning about Harry through his eyes. Pick your comfort food and enjoy Harry’s HBD week!

Still Life, orphaned (M, 3k)

Hourglass Heart by @bixgirl1 (E, 5k)

It only happened once — depending on how Harry counted.

Snug by @moonflower-rose (E, 6k)

Potter can't keep his hands off himself. Draco can't look away.

Life goes not backward by @shealwaysreads (T, 9k)

Harry still isn’t used to gifts, but this one is different. A story of coming home, finding safe ground, and the wild courage of putting down roots.

fine i'll hold my breath / til i forget it's complicated by teatrolley (NR, 11k)

Harry and Draco become friends with benefits, and Harry thinks it's more complicated than it actually is.

Let's Go Outside by cryptonym (E, 24k)

Harry's done with the sofa, the hall and the kitchen table, baby.

Famous by @fw00shy (E, 24k)

It's a couple of years after the war, and Harry's bored of models now, the same way he's bored of Ron's constant nagging, bored of his Weasley monogram knitwear, bored of the same fucking grin that greets him when he hands his fire-truck red Bugatti over to the valet every night. He wants to find—well, he isn't sure what he wants. Anything but models.

Expecto Patronum by @writcraft (E, 35k)

As Draco Malfoy negotiates his feelings for the wizarding world's brightest star, he becomes increasingly attached to Harry and unravels the secrets he keeps hidden from the rest of the world.

Unseen by @jackvbriefs (T, 47k)

Harry Potter finally has the chance to leave England and its expectations for The Chosen One behind for good. All he has to do is survive one Auror training conference overseas with Draco Sodding Malfoy.

Here's The Pencil, Make It Work by ignatiustrout (M, 49k)

Harry thinks "Why is Malfoy working in a coffee shop in muggle London?" is a much simpler question than, "Are you going to accept that auror offer and, if you don't, what will you do?"

Meet Me at Midnight by @the-starryknight (T, 57k)

Harry was beginning to wonder if he’d ever make anything again when Malfoy stormed through the door of Harry’s furniture shop. Now Harry’s got an impossible Ministry commission to finish, and even less energy than ever to deal with his elusive muse.

Modern Love by @tackytigerfic (E, 61k)

Harry Potter, of all people, knows that life isn’t always fair. And no one gets to be happy all of the time. But surely there’s something more—something better—than a rubbish Ministry job, and a lonely old house, and that feeling that everyone out there is doing a better job of living than Harry is.

Harry Potter and the elusive day off by pleasebekidding (E, 71k)

Auror Potter needs a fucking break. He is wiped. He is exhausted. He probably didn't intend to put himself into a magical coma but these things happen. And who cares, really? He is comfortable in a house where he has hidden away all the shit he can't deal with.

I Am Not Who I Became by mab_di (E, 93k)

Draco left England after the trials and has travelled the world meeting wizards and Muggles from different cultures and with vastly different relationships to magic, each other, and the natural world. Now he's a fisherman in Finland on commercial vessels. Harry has been struggling since the war and has become a recluse while trying to write his autobiography.

Little Deaths and How to Avoid Them by nerakrose and dustmouth (T, 96k)

Malfoy is way too interested in coroner reports for somebody who's definitely not looking for ways to die, Harry wants to be friends with him, and Ginny wants to break up with Harry.

Who we are in the shadows by @quicksilvermaid (E, 99k)

What happens when you’re forced to become the very thing you despise? Ex-Auror Harry Potter, tossed out of the Ministry for something he had no control over, has been looking for a way back to his former life.

By the Grace by lettered (T, 140k)

Harry is an Auror instructor. Malfoy wants to be an Auror.

where all the veins meet by eight_of_wands (E, 146k)

It's the summer of 1998. The battle is over, and Voldemort is dead, but Harry still has more questions than answers. Who is he without a piece of Voldemort's soul in his head? What is he supposed to do now?

Away Childish Things by lettered (T, 153k)

Harry gets de-aged. Malfoy has to help him.

Can't Sit Still by wilteddaisy (E, 193k)

Five years after the war, Harry finds himself drawn to Draco Malfoy by memories that aren't his own. Or, in which Harry hates his Auror partner, Draco flips houses, Pansy sleeps around, Hermione is a magical creatures’ justice warrior, Blaise is getting married, and Ron is just along for the ride.

[noxsylvania]

I'm Opening Commissions Once Again!!!!!

Hey y'all! I'm likely gonna be running into work issues real soon and need to get some extra money. If you've been following me a while you've probably heard me talk about not planning on ever doing commissions again, but desperate times and all that.

ADDITIONAL SECRET SALE [aka I forgot to write it on there...]: If you show me proof of a donation of $20 or more to the PCRF, I'll knock 25% off of ANY commission.

More Details Below the Cut!!!

What I will and won't draw:

I will draw, mechs, furries, Sonic characters, complicated armor and clothing. However these may be subject to change in price for extra detail.

I will draw gore, blood, and mildly suggestive art (including partial nudity). However on account of gore, I will not allow self harm injuries or heatshot wounds.

I will not draw NSFW, porn, or fetish art. Sorry! Maybe someday!

I will not draw anything I find might be offensive and I reserve the ability to decline a commission request for ANY reason. Feel free to ask anything if you are unsure.

Payment

I accept payment through Paypal and Venmo, payment must be in USD. After I complete the initial sketch for your commission I will ask for a down payment of $5USD, this payment comes out of the final price! Tips are greatly appreciated as well, but please make a note of it so I know there wasn't a mistake on your end!

Additional Characters:

For lined drawings each additional character is the base price minus %30. For render style 1, each additional character is the base price minus 15%. Additional characters in render style 2 are however the same as the base price, digital paintings take a long time.

About Sales

I have two ongoing sales currently available, Sonic art and Final Fantasy VII art. All sales apply to the full price of the piece, so if you have extra detail or background charges, the sale will apply to the full price PLUS these charges. And of course, if you'd rather I draw a character that you or a friend created, so long as they are designed to be from either Sonic or FFVII, they are included in these two sales. For proof of donation to the PCRF I only need to see your email confirmation showing the amount you donated, feel free to redact your name if you want. All three current sales can stack to a maximum of 35% off! All sales however have a minimum of $5USD, you have to pay me at least SOMETHING..

All sales end on April 1st! If I start working on your commission before that date, the sale will apply to your total even if I finish it AFTER April 1st.

About Backgrounds

I am absolutely happy to do backgrounds, for a price! The price of backgrounds is highly dependent on what you want so I can’t really put estimates here. Please know this can vastly extend the time I would require to finish the piece which may affect refunds. By default, all of my drawings will be transparent PNGs with a solid color BG variant. If you would like a gradient background, those are completely free! Just ask!

Timeline and Refunds

Art takes time, for me as a disabled artist, it's a bit more time than many other artists I know. Commissions are first come first serve, so please know that I can only get to you when I finish anyone else on the waitlist before you. If I do not finish your piece in 30 business days, I will refund your down payment, regardless of how far in I am.

If you have any other questions just ask! Thanks so much!

[myrmica]

do you have any tips for getting better at drawing anatomy? your poses are always so fluid and realistic

first of all THANK YOU!!! that makes me happy to hear!

under the cut because i got long winded... i hope something in here is useful! some of it may stray from the point, and i have no idea what stuff you already know.

in my experience a lot of it is about paying attention to form/volume. at one point or another i realized i vastly prefer art that emphasizes this, as opposed to flatter more stylized anatomy, as far as things i want to emulate in my own work go (flat styles can be cool when other people do it; this is a huge thing with art i think, developing a sense of discernment when it comes to the art you Want To Make versus the art you like but wouldn't want to mimic...)

so i add contour lines to everything i draw as i sketch because it helps me figure out where the object is in space, in relation to the viewer. doing this immediately establishes where the subject is in relation to the "camera" because lines curving one way mean you're looking up at something, and vice versa. if you've ever seen the coil method of foreshortening before, it's the same principle.

while construction lines won't always be there in a finished piece, you can communicate form in the curves of your lines. the round end of a sleeve is a countour line, so are fabric folds (although they have their own volume too), etc.

the feeling of looking up at someone, or their arm moving towards you, or their back turned away from you, that's where a lot of tension and dynamism comes from--some of the "fluidity."

another thing is to focus on weight, and how things interact when they touch... if you grip someone's arm, how does the skin fold/warp under pressure? can you actually draw it doing that, instead of leaving the arm being grabbed unaffected? stuff like that. a huge inspiration for this (and i think it shows in some of the artistic choices i've been making lately) is margot maison's work. like, check out this panel from bora the brain:

or this one of mine, where i just grabbed my own arm like that to see how it felt and what the skin did...

these are both examples of smaller details but the same principle applies any time you're drawing two people touching, or even a bent leg where the thigh and calf meet. i'm more interested in how skin/fat moves around than i am in getting the nitty gritty details of muscle groups and bones right. knowing the muscles and bones certainly HELPS; my personal favorite bones are the radius and ulna in the forearm, and keeping the way they move in mind Is useful because it reminds you that the arm isn't a uniform tube shape, it's a flat rectangle type thing, and it'll look wider or narrower depending on the angle... etc. see pronation/supination gif below:

they get recomended all the time but the morpho books are my favorite reference for doing actual intentional anatomy practice & in redrawing stuff from them a ton of tricks for constructing bodies have stuck in my head. like, here i was focusing on how they simplify the shoulder/armpit in relation to the ribcage:

(you can download most of 'em for free off of libgen btw.)

you can also get something kinda special drawing bodies from life. if you don't have other people to draw, your own hands/legs work too, and it's good for foreshortening and perspective because you're always seeing them in relation to your own viewpoint:

granted both this and the morpho studies are things i find fun to do. on the off chance that you're someone who finds studies tedious or boring, rather than pushing through it you might want to paint a character you like onto the pose you're practicing or something like that to keep yourself invested?

i also use references gratuitously. usually many pictures at once, where i'm combining them to get the pose i want. either just referencing different photos as i draw different things or literally editing them together depending on what it is. over time, i've gotten better at coming up with dynamic and interesting poses without a ref, because using them has built up my understanding of the body (it's actually way easier IMO to draw a dynamic pose without a ref than it is to draw a dude just standing there without one ?!)

there's sort of a push and pull for me between accuracy/realism ("can the arm Actually bend that way???") and exageration/stylistic liscense ("if it doesn't, does it look cooler like that?") where it helps to KNOW if you're drawing something that isn't technically "anatomically correct."

there's also a lot to be said for tracing over photos for practice!

thank you for the question, i love to talk about these things ^_^

[disruptivevoib]

You probably get this a lot, but I love your art style and would like to draw like that (obviously with my own flare and style and not an exact replica because idk how I would even do that), so I was wondering if you have any tips ?

(Obviously you don't have to answer ! I totally get it if you don't wanna ^^')

I never mind giving out advice when/where I can! Drawing takes a lot of time, and its even more time to get a style down (or several! Because I think you wind up finding that many artists have multiple styles or ways they can draw! But there are often still consistencies throughout!)

My biggest suggestion is experimentation. Referencing how other people draw certain things AND also referencing real life. I always suggest using poses, random photos or even your own hand to draw from or use as jumping off points before distorting or changing around anatomy to stylize it.

Messing with brushes too on whatever program you use is always a big suggestion too! I personally love rougher or less "smooth" or vector-looking brushes for things, as well as adoring bigger thicker lines that vary in that thickness depending!

Most of the time esp in the case of line-art I variate line thickness by erasing parts or going back over them or just generally fucking with pen-pressure. Smaller thinner lines put less emphasis on something, where thicker ones make it more evident. Its why thicker outlines all around then the inner lines or details being smaller or thinner works so well!! Bolder the line, the more somebody will see it!

Also experimenting with color and what colors you like to use. I adore a mix of colors but always like at least one to be more neon or to pop more so it stands out and highlights a point in the piece or design!

Other good tips are:

sketching a lot and as much as you are able, but also not to pressure yourself into drawing when you have no motivation or no ideas.

warm-up sketching and drawing before getting into drawing a bigger piece or returning to coloring!

Just in general experimenting more! Again, looking at what your favorite artists do and ALSO how the human form or any form you wish to study functions in reality too. I VERY often will make huges files of art from artists I like or will save photos to look back at or turn opacity up on to sort of vaguely outline. Not to trace and use for my art, but to see or break down how an artist I admire used shapes or gained the fluidity in the art they have.

I am still learning a lot, constantly. And I'm not 100% always the proudest of my work, or I will compare it to someone else with a vastly different niche or style. But, ultimately, I've got to know that art is always a process of growing and changing as much as all things in life!

A very big personal tip is patience. Art takes time, and rushing a piece because you are excited or might put pressure on yourself to finish it- maybe you're sick of it etc, it isn't healthy and it will not produce good work. Draw, color, and paint at your own pace, and allow that pace to be as slow or as fast as it feels.

o7 Hopefully all of that is helpful! I'm always happy to answer more questions!

[waterdeep-weavemoss]

Regarding your work "You Know Better" - I have so many questions! First, why is Tav unhappy with Halsin?

Why does she bounce without so much as a fare-thee-well? Rude.

Why did she and Gale break up?

Why does Gale (presumably) know better?

Could Gale creeping in Tav's subconscious mind be that inciting event? Is Gale the reason she's uncomfy in her choice to be with Halsin? Both historically and currently? Like, is she missing him? Or is he actively messing with her head, making her want to leave?

Where's the rest of this body horror angle you started out so well with?

I do love that piece, but I am impatient and want to see it grow to it's full potential. If I'm being pushy or rude, feel free to tell me to shove off. ❤️

Hey so I just wanted to add your DM to this for the detail:

First, I like how clean and neat your writing is. You convey a lot with not a lot of words. I'm a little bit jealous of that skill. Second, you're right, you don't go heavy on the smut description. You use what little you do include well, though. With regard to writing intimacy, I do think you could go a little further than you did here. Often, it's pointless fucking, but in this case, I think you've got some opportunity to use it to advance the plot and give more details on Tav's relationship with Gale. You can also use it to build Gale's character more. For example, when Tav asks Gale if he thinks he's in control, that's an opportunity for him to show her that he is 100% calling all the shots, and she only has the illusion of control. Depending on where their story is headed, there's even an opportunity to build on that body horror angle, first with Gale taunting her about getting her pregnant even though she's her reluctant to have a child with Halsin, and then, again, depending on the plot, actually getting her pregnant, maybe even against her will. Conversely, if Gale is going to be making her worse, he could bring her around to the idea of having his child - a whole "surrendering her body for his heir" kind of a thing. If you'll pardon the pun, it's fertile ground for some great drama and conflict. In any case, I understand the reluctance to write about it when you don't feel qualified. The best advice I've ever seen when trying to improve any kind of writing is to read other people's work and pull what you like from what they did. I still can't claim to be super comfortable with writing smut, but I do find that the more I do it, the easier it is. I hope at least some of that was helpful. I do hope you have more planned for this one and can't wait to see it!

***

Thank you for the feedback. I'll go through the questions in order.

She's unhappy because she's not interested in being a parent but he has really thrown himself into it. I honestly thought I'd been clear in that but I will take that forward as needing to add more detail in future.

She feels trapped, and doesn't feel like she can't talk it through with him. They have vastly different goals and she feels he doesn't understand her.

Another one that was obvious in my head but didn't translate to the page, they broke up because she was swept up in Halsin's desire for her.

The title is a reference to It Will Come Back by Hozier: 'you know better babe, you know better babe' is the opening of the song.

She both misses Gale and he's messing with her.

The body horror angle was the idea of pregnancy. She's so scared of it/being a parent that she flees a stable life with Halsin.

I hope that helped a bit? I didn't concieve of it as a multi part story, but if you'd like more of it I'd be happy to go from where it left off. The idea of Gale manipulating her intrigues me especially, given she is childfree and wants to remain so.

I have to say this is more detailed/better criticism than I received even in my masters degree, so thank you for that!

[snailmail444]

hi snail :)

i’m trying my hand at writing fics (for the first time :U), i was wondering if you could give some tips on how to characterize the bachelors. i’m writing a sebby fic and i’m scared of making him nothing like his actual personality.

🫶🏽 thanks 🫶🏽

That is so exciting I’m literally so happy for you! I hope you like it because it can be so much fun to have writing as a creative outlet to enjoy it’s one of my favorite things.

I still am working on characterization all the time because I think I have the same worries and a lot of people do that their characters will feel generic or in-authentic. A few tips that help me are:

-I try to create a core to a character, and then expand out from there.

-So say for example Sebastian. When I think of him I see his core as a nerdy, anxious, loner, who feels and thinks deeply, is smart, and introverted.

-Keeping those traits in mind I can ask myself in certain situations how would he react? Like he’s probably hate a crowded party, want to leave, or might even lash out because he’s overstimulated. Or if he’s meeting someone for the first time he might be shy, quiet, or push them away depending on how prickly you want him to be. On the flip-side if he’s with one or two people who he knows and they’re watching a movie he likes, he’d probably call out some fun facts or scenes he likes.

-But those are just my opinions and may not align with everybody’s ideas of him. The most important part is staying true to yourself and the aspects of him you find important. Your core might look very similar or completely different to my core, and that’s okay! I’ve seen tons of different takes on the same characters and I find myself agreeing with a lot of them, even if they’re vastly different.

-As long as you’re enjoying yourself and staying consistent with your characters baser motivations then you’re going to be presenting a character that feels real and authentic, and as far as the specific bachelors/bachelorettes I think the game gives you the barest bones and building on them you’ll naturally find that they feel like the character you portray them as.

-Don’t forget backstory elements. You don’t need to know everything, but a few key things will change how a character interacts with the world. For example, if the character was raised in a household with a lot of unhealthy arguing, they might have conflict anxiety or when they argue they might have those same habits. This could be for anything! If there’s a big life-changing event in their past, it’s likely influencing them now.

Sorry I dropped my phone and hit post before it was done hopefully you’re seeing this after I edited it. Good luck on your writing journey! And most importantly HAVE FUN! Because that’s what it’s all about at the end of the day 💕💕💕

[slithergaunt]

More of that stuff

Some of ya'll might remember I used to have a comic I did, Serpent Song

This shit was my LIFE for several years. A passion project I hoped would lead to other opportunities, but ultimately it was just something I wanted to do. I wanted to make a book and have it be finished and real. And it ended up actually happening! I proved to myself I could finish something and end up with a finished book. (In fact, one could still buy it, if one so wished) 

 It was hard hard work, but I ended up really happy with it. So I had every intention of continuing it.

Until, a couple pages into chapter 3, when I was hit with The Burnout. That dreaded thing we artists always fear, which can maim and cripple your brain like nobody's business. I tried to ignore/power through it for quite a while, but I was kidding myself. It was here.

That was 2019. To be fair, I also was neck-deep in the horrible sludge of Retail to make ends meet. I had less energy to go around, and comics (as you might've heard from other folks) requires a LOT of energy and attention span.

At the end of the day, it was enormous amounts of energy being poured into something that wasn't really keeping me afloat. I was hit hard. I'd never experienced burnout before, so it was a very new sensation, being unable to create jack shit.

Only in recent months have I finally started to get back into it. My living situation is vastly improved, and so far commissions have been enough to pay bills. Not only that, I'm ENJOYING commissions again. Things are better-ish. My brain is feeling competent again.

Personal work, artsy abstract work, different mediums etc.. have all helped me enjoy stuff again. HOWEVER, a lot of the stuff I've done, while fun and relaxing, hasn't given me that sense of accomplishment that Serpent Song did.

Lots of folks draw monsters and stuff all day long, and I love it too, but Serpent Song was the first time I'd ever felt "Holy shit, I'm the ONLY person who could've made this.." Lots of folks can get that feeling from different sources, but this was the first for me.

Lately I've been longing for that feeling more and more. The feeling of doing something that feels like a truly unique accomplishment. As terrified as I am of burnout now, I need to find a way to get that back. One way or another.

Plus, I really want to give people more of this story. I was so touched by how many people loved the book, even enough to make fanart of it! I wanna give back to the patre0n supporters and everyone who helped keep it going. There's so much more I want to do.

So in summation, I am currently in the process of making new Serpent Song chapters. I'll be experimenting with a few methods to hopefully make the process easier, which does mean there may be some visual changes in how the comic looks. I refuse to over-simplify the art and draw something that doesn't feel like my style, but depending on what methods work for me, line-art and shading may look slightly different that previous chapters. That said, I think I'm finally ready to pick up where I left off.

Let’s do crazy shit again. <3

[dragonmuse]

I love all the frontfacing stuff and I think it's things I would be pretty good with, like helping customers, organizing events, cooperating with other organizations and desinging pretty displays. But I wonder if I'm getting a totally wrong idea of what it means to be a librarian in a public library. So, only if you don't mind talking about work in your time off, what are things you do that the customers don't see? What should someone know about it before going down this career path?

Gooood morning! I'd be happy to talk about it. Some caveats are that every library is different and I've worked mainly worked at one for most of my career, but I do talk to other librarians a great deal through various online groups. My experience is mainly suburban, rural and urban libraries sometimes have vastly different setups. Also I work in the adult section, but I do have a good relationship with the children's librarians (highly recommend this, they are almost to a one, very kind and interesting people and also are great at re-using things for crafts etc. You will get great ideas from them.)

I am going to talk about front-facing for a bit just because I actually think it's the thing people overlook the most when thinking about going into libraries. The most amazing thing about public libraries is that it's one of the few places anyone can walk into and not be asked to buy anything. It's a great feeling to work somewhere like that and you will help a lot of people! Most days I walk out with a good warm feeling, have talk to lots of interesting and thoughtful people!

What follows is not to dissuade you, it's just the part that a library school professor probably won't discuss.

You will also be dealing with things that you are not equipped to help with or find overwhelming. Even at a relatively quiet library, I have been screamed out for any number of perceived wrongs, tried to help someone who is in the middle of a severe mental health episode, and dealt with complaints from other patrons about odors or mannerisms that the other person simply can't help.

I've had people looking at pornography on a public screen just to provoke a reaction. Sometimes people will try to flirt with you or try to make you uncomfortable in that manner.

I worked in retail before libraries and it can be very similar in this way, except in retail the interactions have natural limits. In libraries, sometimes someone difficult to work with will be there all day every day just skirting the line of what's acceptable.

This is a very small minority of the interactions that I've had, but they stick with you. You will sometimes feel very helpless when you see someone suffering. You will sometimes be scared at the level of anger someone can bring to a banal interaction.

The back end of library work that people might not see? There's politics! You might have a board that you answer to or a town council and people are concerned about how their taxes are being spent. Sometimes they don't value the library very much at all and you will spend time fighting for scraps of budget.

On a day to day basis, your job will really depend on how many other librarians work with you. The smaller the staff, the more hats you wear. At a very large library, your sole job might be to work the desk and maybe do some collection development. The smaller it gets, you might be running book clubs and programs, doing IT, social media, dealing with database vendors, maybe cataloging. If you're small enough (my first job I was the only employee!), you might be doing the shelving and circulation duties too. You might do desk schedules, manage people, or sometimes fix things if there's no one else around to do it.

You will likely not get paid very much. A library degree is the third worst paid master's degree in the US (other two are teaching and social work). Before you seriously consider library school, please look at the job listings in your area. It's not unusual for the director of a small library to be making the same salary as a starting teacher in the same area. You will almost definitely have to work at least one or two nights a week and probably weekends here and there. Libraries are open for the public's convenience which means weekends and after work.

Circulation of physical items has dropped year over year for the last twenty years. The job is less about books every day. It's about being a community center, an internet cafe, and a safe (hopefully) place to stay during the day.

I know that's really broad, so let me know if you want me to zoom in on anything specific.

[kallistcs]

SHIPPING INFO // ANSWER THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR MUSE(S) SO PEOPLE KNOW HOW SHIPPING WORKS ON YOUR BLOG.

WHAT IS YOUR OTP FOR YOUR CHARACTER(S)?

Zeus/Ganymede, Helen/Paris, Menelaus/Paris (also the OT3 and YES, I know that's not "ONE true pairing" but when it comes to Paris they all weigh even ok!! I can't choose!) Heracles/Adonis

HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?

Eeeh, it's (almost) whatever; I'm just not very interested in putting focus on the age gap and what it might mean for the couple, if there is one. Given basically any ship that isn't god/god in Greek myth has inbuilt "age gap", it's a kind of worthless metric for RPing characters from it. For human/human ships... 20-25 years of a gap, thereabouts.

HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY ARE CONSIDERED NSFW?

"I'll know it when I see it"? Idk it's a bit of a floating line for me, but at the very least when hands end up on genitals/genitals end up coming into play in some way. If the narrative/speech is steamy enough, too, I might consider it NSFW at that point, but nothing hard and fast aside from the above.

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?

Prrrobably? For some characters, I have my preferred ship(s) and that's it, sorry dfbhdj For others, I can be more flexible, but it highly depends. I'm more than willing to just jump off from a meme or whatever without talking about it beforehand if we share the ship it's about, though, to see if the chemistry works! Talking a little would undoubtedly be helpful for anything more developed, though. Crossover ships aren't usually my thing, so that depends on the characters involved. Both in terms of "is this a character I am interested in shipping out of canon" and if they're working together chemistry-wise and us as RPers.

WHO ARE OTHER CHARACTERS YOU SHIP YOUR CHARACTER WITH?

For Adonis, Apollo, mainly. Others might happen with development, but he's just not really a ship-priority at all. For Paris... you got a (Greek myth usually) male character, whether friend or enemy, we can see about it. He's definitely my bicycle here, even if we're just talking the equivalent of a one night stand lol. THAT SAID; Ares/Paris would be interesting! Achilles isn't here for shipping, really, but as I note elsewhere, Antilochus post-Patroclus death would be interesting. Penthesilea... give her a girl and she'll be very happy. :) I'm open here, really!

DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?

Depends; as long as it's one of the ships I'm already interested in, just toss them at me and we can test it out. Otherwise, it's a good idea to talk about it /waves hand at the above question. Helen/Paris, as I note elsewhere in my info, definitely talk to me about it first, so we're both on the same page about it. This is a ship we can have vastly different ideas about, after all.

ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?

If we mean "shipping" as in "romantic shipping"; not at all. I love family/platonic relationships (Adonis and Paris are definitely majorly here for that).

ARE YOU MULTISHIP?

Yep. Both in terms of "having multiple different ships going in their own 'verses with one of my characters" and "the same ships with different people with one character". (Though, I have to say, Tumblr's setup with how we all see everything we do makes the latter a little awkward to me. :/ I know it's hard not to compare ourselves to others etc sometimes, so while I'm still open for the latter, if you'd want to RP more privately on Discord or elsewhere to cut down on that sort of thing, I'm more than open to that.)

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?

I can't choose, you can't make me choose!! Zeus/Ganymede and Helen/Menelaus/Paris :V

FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?

As mentioned, if it's a ship I already have, find a shippy meme or just send a short starter or something and we can test the waters. Otherwise, probably easiest to talk a little about it first.

stolen from: @singofus :) tagging... I mean if you wanna do it?? DO IT

[foilfreak]

Beauty and Her Beast: Chapter 2

Warning: This fic is rated NSFW and contains graphic depictions of things some people may find disturbing or alarming, including, but not limited to: violence, gore, unhealthy family relationships, Oedipus complexes, gratuitous amount of pornographic literature, ableist language, physical, mental, and emotional abuse, etc. If you are someone who does not enjoy fiction with these elements in them, then I suggest you refrain from reading this, because this fic will have all that, and probably a lot more. So, this is your first and final warning to turn around and go somewhere else if stuff like this just isn't your vibe, because from this point forward, your emotional wellbeing is in your own hands, and I will not be accepting blame if you disregarded my warnings and ended up reading something you didn't like. Idk why I feel compelled to write one of these despite this being Resident Evil fanfic, but I figured I'd cover my ass just in case.

(Link to ao3 version in comments below)

Chapter 2:

The journey to Mother Miranda’s personal laboratory was much shorter and more enjoyable than the original walk to the meeting site, in Salvatore’s humble opinion.

Mother Miranda was mostly quiet, distant, and preoccupied throughout the duration of the walk, even more so than normal. That being said however, while this sort of behavior would usually spell disaster for whichever one of the 4 lords was forced to be in her presence during these sorts of moods, in this situation, Mother Miranda did not appear tense or agitated or hostile like she usually would be. Just lost in thought. As though she were only quiet because she was too busy thinking about something else to speak. She didn’t even seem to mind his various attempts at starting conversation, which surprised, but endlessly delighted, the mutant man.

‘Mother must be in a very good mood today. She hasn’t hit me or told me to shut up the whole time we’ve been together. Maybe she’s made another breakthrough with the cadou? I’d certainly be very happy if I were in her shoes’ Salvatore excitedly thought to himself as the woman in question stepped forward to unlock and open the large steel door of her personal laboratory, allowing Salvatore to step into the facility before closing and locking it again behind her.

“Moreau, do you recall the set of mutation experiments I began at the beginning of last year?” The raven mother asked, turning around and beginning to quickly make her way down the long, dark corridor.

“Y-you mean… the o-ones with the new c-cadou strain th-that I… that I d-developed… f-for you?” Salvatore stutters, breath labored and body struggling to keep up with the taller woman’s vastly larger steps.

“Correct” Mother Miranda says, turning a corner. “As impressed as I was with the final results of this particular strain, I’m afraid it still isn’t good enough. None of the subjects I implanted with cadou last year turned out to be favorable candidates.”

Salvatore stops in his tracks, a look of horror and agony on his face as news that he’d failed mother once again practically tears him apart from the inside out. “O-oh Mother… I-im so s-s-sorry to h-hear that… b-but don’t w-worry… I’ll-I’ll try h-harder next t-time… I w-won’t fail y-you again Mother, so p-please… please j-just give me a-another chance to get it r-right… i b-beg of y-you…”

Mother Miranda stops and turns toward the mutated lord, staring at him in silence as he drops to his knees and grovels at her feet, begging desperately for his failures to be forgiven.

“Off your knees, Moreau, this behavior is unbecoming of a Lord such as yourself. Besides, I never said that you were the one to blame for the lack of successful results, nor am I necessarily displeased by the fact that these experiments yielded failed vessels.”

Salvatore allows his gaze to rise to his mother’s face, where, true to her words, the parts of Miranda’s face that Salvatore could make out from behind her mask did not appear marred with the familiar expressions of anger and disappointment that the 4 lords were usually met with after another round of failed vessels.

“Y-you’re… you’re not upset with m-me?” The deformed man asks, his voice laced with shock and disbelief.

“No, my child, I’m not upset with you. While these experiments may have ended in failure, they did provide me with useful information that may prove to be pertinent to our mission in the near future. In fact, as I said earlier, the reason why I’ve brought you here is because I want to give you a gift, as a reward for all your incredible work. Did you expect me to be upset with you simply because this round proved unsuccessful as well? Do you really think so poorly of your loving mother, who works tirelessly to ensure her children are happy and rewarded for all their faith and trust in me?” Mother Miranda sniveled pitifully, turning her gaze away in mock dejection as Salvatore, horrified that he’d insulted and hurt her somehow, scrambles to his feet, gently taking both of Miranda’s hands into his own and holding the supple skin to his bloated and deformed face, desperately hoping this would comfort her.

“No no no no, o-of course n-not, Mother… I-I’d never expect s-something like th-that from y-you… and-and I k-know better… b-better than a-anyone… just h-how h-hard you w-work… not j-just on y-your experiments… but f-for all o-of us… too… you l-l-love us… you… love ME… I-I’ll always love y-you, Mother… always” Salvatore blurts, stumbling over his words as he tries desperately to comfort Mother Miranda, an effort he’s seemingly rewarded for, when Miranda takes one of her hands away and brings it back to the top of Salvatore’s head, once again gently brushing her hand against it.

Salvatore’s knees nearly give out from under him as the heavenly sensation washes throughout his body like a raging typhoon, leaving him feeling tired and weak yet hungry and wanting for more, though whatever that “more” was, Salvatore was quick to beat it back down deep within himself, knowing this was neither the time nor the place for him to be entertaining such… primal desires about someone like Mother Miranda, no matter how little he intends to act on them.

“Thank you, Moreau. You always know exactly what to say to make Mother feel better. You’re such a good boy” Mother Miranda says, making sure to put extra emphasis onto the last two words as she reaches forward and pulls Salvatore closer to her.

“G-g-g-gggg… good… boy… me?” Salvatore chokes, tears beginning to fill his eyes as Mother Miranda’s arms come to wrap around him, pushing the deformed man’s face to lean against the soft, feathery material of her bosom.

“Yes, Moreau. You’ve always been very special to me. From the day I met you, you’ve been such a good, well-behaved boy that I never have to worry about” Miranda begins, her face blank and expressionless as she passionlessly strokes Salvatore’s face. “No matter how simple the task, those 3 are always making mistakes of some kind and forcing me to come and clean up their messes after them, especially that snake Heisenberg. But you? No, never you, Moreau, not my special, perfect little boy who always tries his best to make Mother happy. Do you enjoy making Mother happy, Moreau?”

“Y-y-yES! Of-of c-course I do” Salvatore moans, his voice slightly muffled by Miranda’s chest as he violently nods his head in affirmation, tears freely falling from his eyes as his head swims deliriously from the endless wave of kind words and gentle touches.

“Good! I always knew you did. And for that, I'm going to reward you with something very special. Something to… keep you busy... while I’m away for a little while” The raven mother coos again.

Salvatore stops for a moment when the meaning of Miranda’s words finally registers in his brain. “While… w-while you’re… away? You’re l-leaving us?” Salvatore asks, his voice growing increasingly distressed with each word.

“Only for a short time, hopefully,” Mother Miranda answers, “but yes, at the end of this month, I will be leaving the village in order to attend to some very important business I have. I’m not sure how my journey will fare, however I'm optimistic that it will be the key necessary to finally getting my Ev- uh… pardon me; the key to finally achieving our goal of creating a perfect vessel. Doesn’t that sound nice, Moreau?”

“It-it does” the deformed man says quietly, still put off by the mention of Mother leaving, but not wanting to put a damper on his mother’s incredibly rare good mood. “But… where is i-it… th-that you’ll be g-going… an-and for h-how long?”

“Just down the mountain to pay someone a visit, however I have no idea when I'll be back. That will depend on how successful my mission goes, I suppose.”

Silence falls over the two as Salvatore, still upset by the news that Mother Miranda would be leaving, continues to take in the comfort and warmth of his Mother’s arms for just a moment longer, selfishly wishing that Mother held him more often. Eventually however, Mother Miranda does pull back from the superficial embrace, gesturing for Salvatore to follow her once more, which the deformed man begins to do without question.

“Of the 4 of you, you’re the last one to come and pick your gift,” Miranda says, unaware of the visible slump that Salvatore’s shoulders take on upon hearing this. “However, despite there only being one option left, it would appear as though your siblings have decided to spare you their usual games of trickery this time around. If anything, I think you might be the one to have ended up with the best deal after everything is said and done.”

Salvatore looks up at Mother Miranda with an expression of mild confusion, wondering what on earth she could mean by that. His musings are quickly interrupted however, when the two enter a large room filled with various pods.

“Of the 22 test subjects we started with last year, only 13 were genetically compatible with the cadou parasite, and even then, only 4 ended up surviving the full mutation phase. Despite their impressively stable conditions, they still aren’t suitable vessels for my purposes, however I felt as though it would be such a waste to just do away with them. So, with that in mind, I’ve decided that my gift to you all, before I must leave you for a time, is to give one test subject to each of you.”

“G-give? You’re… y-you’re giving us t-test subjects?” Salvatore repeats dumbly, not certain he understood where this was going.

“Correct” Mother Miranda affirms. “This is easily the most successful batch of mutations we’ve seen to date, and given the amount of time and effort I poured into making sure these last 4 survived until now, I’d at least like to see some use gotten out of them before they die or suddenly lose control of their mutations and go rogue.”

“Like… l-like what?” The hooded man asks nervously.

Miranda merely shrugs her shoulders, uncaring. “Anything you like. Housekeeper. Playmate. Labrat. Partner in Crime. Whatever it is you desire of your gift, you may have without question. And in the event they refuse you… well, you’ll at least have a fun little toy to chase after for a little while.”

“I... see...” Salvatore says quietly, growing less and less excited about this whole “gift” thing, now that he knows that his gift is just another person.

Another person to scream and wail at how unbelievably hideous and disgusting of a monster he looks, no doubt.

Without another word, Miranda heads over to the large control table located in the middle of the room, pressing a few buttons before 4 of the many identical pods begin moving toward them. Steam pours out the tops and bottoms of the metal pods as the large capsules slowly finish lowering themselves from their hung pedestals, displaying them directly in front of Miranda and Salvatore.  The man in question stands anxiously in front of the still sealed door, nervously fidgeting with his fingers as he waits for Mother to show him his gift, a myriad of thoughts and fears and worries flying throughout the mutant man’s mind.

“The first 3 have already been chosen by your siblings, but the one on the far right is all yours” Miranda says, pushing another button that causes the singular pod in question to click open, its door slowly beginning to rise upward toward the ceiling.

Salvatore nods in understanding as he tries to avoid watching the door of the pod open, instead hyper focusing on what Miranda is saying as the tension in the room becomes so thick it feels as if it could be cut with a dull knife.

After what felt like an eternity and a half of waiting, the pod door finally finished opening, and in that exact moment, as the disfigured man’s gaze finally fell upon the sight of his gift for the first time, his eyes went wide in shock, his mouth dropped open in disbelief, and his hands fell limply to his side in complete and utter bewilderment at the sight that stood before him.

“That… th-that’s… for me?” Salvatore manages to croak out, his throat suddenly dry as a desert and the air from his lungs having left him the second before.

Raising his hand up toward the creature wired into the pod, the hooded man finds himself unable to look away, feeling almost mesmerized as his mind struggles to figure out whether all this is really happening, or if he’d finally succumbed to the insanity of his condition and dreamt all this up as a sick and twisted way of coping with his soul crushing loneliness. Either one was just as likely at this point.

“I’m sure you’ll still be quite pitiful on the day I have to leave, but at least this way you’ll have something to keep yourself occupied with until I return, yes?” Mother Miranda says smugly, clearly pleased by his reaction. “So, what do you think, Moreau? Do you like the gift I’ve gotten for you?”

It wasn't until after several moments of silence that Salvatore finally responded. After stuttering and slurring unintelligibly over several sentences worth of responses, 2 words, and 2 words alone, finally managed to tumble from the mutant man’s lips, his eyes shining as he finally reached forward enough to slowly and carefully intertwine his fingers with the small and delicate hand of the beautiful young woman that slept peacefully inside the pod.

“She’s perfect!”

[ace-memelord]

how do you get cute outfits on teso like the ones your characters have ?? i just started playing today! :D

Well first of all, welcome to ESO! Hope you’re enjoying it so far :)

Fashion scrolls is a pretty big category but there are 2 main ways to categorize it- costumes & motifs. Small guide under the cut and apologies for the ramble 💦

Costumes are appearance only and override whatever armor you’re wearing; you’ll find them in your collections tab. There are costumes in the crown store, some you can get as quest rewards/achievements, and others may be available for limited time during events or in crown crates. If you want to see all available costumes I recommend looking through ESO fashion!

Next up is Motifs, and they require a little more work but the payoff is so good. As a new player, I can’t recommend getting into crafting enough, it’s going to help you so much down the road; not just for gameplay, but expanding your fashion too! Like costumes, crafting motifs are available in crown store (but are quite expensive), can be rewarded for doing daily quests, digging for antiquities, etc. Motifs are far more customizable than costumes, and there are A TON you can learn. You can check here or here for available motifs and which DLC is required to farm them! Just remember that being able to use motifs depends on your crafting levels!

Like I mentioned, your ability to farm certain motifs and/or costumes depend on which content you have available to you. If you have ESO+ no sweat, you have all bases covered. But if you do not, it can be a little harder and you may have to farm gold instead to buy motif chapters at Guild Traders. Don’t worry though, it’s not as difficult as it sounds :) There are a ton of good communities available to new players that can help!

Lastly, if there’s a specific outfit or costume you see me post, anyone is welcome to ask what it is! I have a lot of toons with vastly different styles, and hardly ever stick to a single motif- it’s fun to mix and match. I am also a Grand Master Crafter on PC NA, and love to help anyone who needs crafting assistance. 

I hope this helps a little! Feel free to send any more questions my way, I’m happy to assist when I can 👈🏻👈🏻😎

IMPORTANT: realized while reading through I forgot to mention- if you have more than one character make sure you designate which of them will be your main crafter to learn motifs. This is very important later on if you are trying to do Master Writs or even just get style achievements. Motifs you learn will be available on all characters but will only go into the lore library of the char. you used it on.

[sitp-recs]

i saw your recent draco!pinning and oblivious!harry rec and wondered if you knew any either-pinning/other-oblivious rec with a lot of angst. buckets upon buckets of angst. thank you so much!!!!

Hello there! Oof this was hands down one of the hardest lists I’ve ever made. Angst can be so so subjective and I second guessed my picks for a long time, until I said “fuck it” and decided to include all stories that speak the most to me. I’ve read lots of angst over the years but these are the ones that come to mind when someone says “buckets of angst”.

I’m naming this list “angst with a (in 98% of the cases) happy ending” 😂 all of these hurt damn good and have lots of pining. I tried to include different flavors of angst too, so that everyone can find something for their tastes. And I left a few suggestions at the end - of fics that didn’t quite work for me but might be someone else’s jam. Hopefully I did a decent job. Enjoy!

Closure is a state of mind by @quicksilvermaid (2020, E, 12k) - bittersweet ending

After Harry's husband Charlie is killed, his Mind Healer recommends a Polyjuice therapy company, so Harry can see 'Charlie' again and find closure over his death.

Kissed by @potteresque-ire (2015, M, 12k)

Draco Malfoy was attacked by a rogue Dementor on the night of his Azkaban release. He self-exiled to Muggle London and opened a late-night chocolate shop called Kissed.

Voices From The Fog by @noeeon (2010, E, 13k)

After years of running away, Harry crosses paths with an all-too familiar face and follows him to Amsterdam.

And I Know the Spark by @firethesound (2014, E, 15k)

All Draco cares about is keeping Potter alive, and he’ll do whatever it takes to make sure that happens.

I'll never be your chosen one by @andithiel (2019, E, 15k)

Draco doesn't know what exactly he’s doing with Potter, he doesn't know how their unspoken agreement even started, and doesn't know where it will end. The only thing he knows is: he's not in love.

you've got the antidote for me by Kandakicksass (2018, M, 20k)

When Harry Potter unintentionally severs their soulbond before it can fully form, Draco Malfoy resigns himself to a slow death and decides not to burden Harry with a soulmate he's made it very clear he doesn't want.

In His Nature by create_serenity (2015, M, 20k)

Harry agreed to have sex with Draco once a month in order to keep him alive, what he didn’t agree to was Draco popping up all over the place and disrupting his life in more ways than one.

Tuxedo Angel by tryslora (2013, E, 25k)

Harry and Neville are looking for the infamous Dragon Lily, a Dark witch active throughout Europe and Asia. Instead, they find the Tuxedo Angel, a beautiful witch performing in Rome.

Exposure by GallaPlacidia (2020, M, 27k)

When Seamus uncovers Draco Malfoy's camboy profile, he, Harry and Ron decide to anonymously book a private show so as to humiliate him later.

Stain of Silence by brummell (2013, E, 28k)

After the war, Draco serves out his sentence in Harry Potter's house.

(The Piece) I was Missing All Along by lauren3210 (2014, E, 30k)

Draco and Harry have been flatmates and best friends for years, and Draco thinks life is just perfect that way.

Make Me a Headline (I Want to Be That Bold) by @dictacontrion (2015, E, 31k)

Draco never expected to see Harry doing that again. Especially with someone else, in a grainy photograph that's landed on his desk one Monday morning.

The Bucket List by GallaPlacidia (2020, NR, 32k)

Draco will die in six months if he can't get Harry Potter to fall in love with him. Since that's not going to happen, he might as well spend his last days working through his Bucket List.

On One's Knees by pir8fancier (2008, E, 33k)

The war is over and to the victors go the spoils.

All Roads by @korlaena, Saulaie (2019, M, 36k)

Draco hates his job at the Prophet. He hates it even more when he’s assigned to write an article on Harry Potter, who left the country three years ago after their falling out.

He Who Must Not Be Normal by @letteredlettered (2013, E, 41k)

Potter has fame and fortune and posh clothes and all he wants is a simple life. Draco has a flat and a cat and a steady job and all he wants is a complicated life.

As Souls From Bodies Steal by @femmequixotic (2012, E, 41k)

Hope may be found in the oddest of places, even in the bleakness of winter.

In The Red by @bixgirl1 (2018, E, 45k)

When Harry goes looking for a vampire at a Creature club, the second-to-last thing Harry expects is to find Malfoy working there.

Blood and Fire by @lqtraintracks (2017, E, 45k)

Harry has spent the last twelve years in Romania, not returning to England as often as he knows he should. It's complicated.

Of Fates Entwined: A Story of Love Lost and Found by taradiane (2014, E, 51k)

Harry Potter vanished without a trace from his home on a warm summer morning in June 2004.

The Boy Who Only Lived Twice by lettered (2012, E, 54k)

Harry Potter is an Unspeakable. Draco Malfoy is the wizard who shagged him.

You open always (petal by petal) by birdsofshore (2017, E, 65k)

Harry’s not the kind of person who pays for sex. He really isn’t. Until he is.

We Are Young (I'll Carry You Home Tonight) by @femmequixotic (2012, E, 68k)

Harry and Draco have been falling into bed on and off again since the last election five years ago, much to the amusement--and financial gain--of their circle of friends.

Super Rich Kids by trishjames (2020, E, 81k)

Draco Malfoy has become disillusioned by the glitz and glamour of the scandalous lives of the Post-Second Wizarding War Pureblood Elite.

Merlin Works in Mysterious Ways by lordhellebore (2013, E, 82k) - tw: major permanent disability, this one is sad af

When Harry is forced to form a Blood Bond with Draco Malfoy under threat of death, he thinks his future will consist of a cold home and sexual frustration.

Balance, Imperfect by bixgirl1 (2017, E, 91k)

When Harry sustains an injury in the line of work, he no longer knows how to navigate the life he loved, and finds help and solace from the most unexpected source.

I Am Not Who I Became by mab_di (2019, E, 93k)

Draco left England after the trials and has travelled the world meeting wizards and Muggles from different cultures and with vastly different relationships to magic, each other, and the natural world.

Far From The Tree by aideomai (2020, E, 112k)

The arrival of Harry Potter’s children—snapped back in time, the children themselves guessed, twenty or so years—was the most interesting thing to happen at Hogwarts for years.

Grounds for Divorce by @tepre (2019, E, 122k)

Malfoy finds a coin. Harry finds a letter.

Bonus 1: short fics!

Hourglass Heart @bixgirl1 (2019, E, 5k)

It only happened once — depending on how Harry counted.

Packing the Flat by marguerite_26 (2012, E, 6k)

Months after their explosive break-up, Draco insists Harry return to their flat to remove his belongings.

hear me (with your whole body) by @teacup-tai (2020, E, 9k) - bittersweet ending

He would give it a go. See what it was like. He could always say no, right?

Bonus 2: other fics that suit your requirements. Mind the tags!

Unhook the Stars by jad (2012, E, 70k)

Seventy-thousand words of pornographic discourse between two boys-turned-men that still haven't learned how to communicate like normal people – with words.

A Big Black Sky by AlexMeg (2019, M, 90k)

Draco leans his head closer, biting the quiver out of his lips before he breathes a laden and shuddering exhale, and he whispers, "You are my star in a big black sky."

Another Mask Behind You by lettered (2014, E, 116k)

Draco is a high-end prostitute who hides his identity. Harry unknowingly hires him.

[gumnut-logic]

Callisto (Voyage - Bit 3)

Prologue Incident - Bit 1 | Bit 2 Fallout - Bit 1 | Bit 2 | Bit 3 Voyage - Bit 1 | Bit 2 | Bit 3

This has settled down to a once a week post at the moment. I am still writing, but I’ve been writing the Prologue because I realised that I hadn’t written enough backstory to support the main story. So expect 4000-odd words of Jeff landing on Mars in the near future.

In the meantime, here is a little terrible twos being good bros.

As always, many, many thanks to @tsarinatorment​ @scribbles97​ and @janetm74​ for all their patient help. I’ve been a pain lately, so they have suffered greatly for my fic :D

I hope you enjoy this last bit of Part Two.

-o-o-o-

Gordon sat back and watched his father and Virgil leave the cockpit. John followed a moment later.

Gordon wasn’t hungry, not by a long shot. His stomach was still protesting the jump and he was quite happy staying where he was.

He wasn’t surprised that Scott, after reassuring himself that Alan was okay monitoring the course correction, disappeared after John. Gordon did not want to be in the room when that encounter happened. Not that he didn’t have his own beef with the astronaut over this. He couldn’t believe John would support their father going into space. John, of all people knew the health ramifications.

Speaking of which…

He unbuckled and pushed off his chair in the direction of his father’s chair. Formerly, his chair. He was of two minds regarding that fact, but considering he didn’t think Dad should even be in space, where he sat was of the least importance.

He hooked his foot around the base of the seat and pulled himself in beside his little brother.

Gordon’s eyes danced over the flight controls. “How’s it going?”

Alan glanced at him. “Computer is performing perfectly. We’ll stop to drop the buoy in about twenty-five minutes.” A raised eyebrow. “How’s the tummy?” And yes, there was a small smirk accompanying that.

“It’s fine.” As if to penalise him for lying to his little brother, his gut twisted.

Gordon let out a groan.

The smirk turned to a worried frown. “You sure you’re okay.”

He grunted at his brother. “I’ll live.” And he remembered that there were four more jumps there and likely five more on the way back. “Maybe.”

“Get Virg to drug you up. You’ll enjoy it more.”

‘Enjoy’ was rarely in the same sentence as ‘space’ in Gordon’s book. “Might do that.” Puking in zero-g was just messy and not to mention gross. “How come you aren’t feeling it?”

Alan shrugged. “Been playing with g-forces since I was a kid? This isn’t much different.”

Gordon grunted at him again.

They sat there together for a moment or two. There was something about hanging with his little brother that was different from hanging with his older brothers. More relaxed maybe, or just…different.

“Not often my ‘bird carries yours. This has to be only the second time.”

Gordon blinked. “Yeah? I think so. Not too many oceans in space.”

“Tell that to the Jupiter system.”

Space oceans were a thing. After the mad dash that was their trip to Europa, Gordon had made a point of reading up on all the extra-terrestrial oceans he could find.

Earth, of course, was the only body in the solar system with surface liquid water. There were buckets of ice on many of the other planets and moons, but none of that interested the aquanaut. He preferred his water well above zero degrees celsius.

Europa had been fascinating and he was still basking in the accolades from the scientific paper that he, Alan and his heroes, the Pendergasts, had jointly written. Readings from Four’s scanners had recorded everything and Earth’s scientific compliment were still going nuts years later. Tracy Industries had helped fund a proper scientific expedition to the moon.

Hmm, come to think of it, they should probably drop in and say hi on the way back. Would be interesting to catch up with Gwen and her team in person instead of over holovid.

Would be hilarious to knock on their door as a surprise. Hi, we were just in the area…

He grinned.

“What are you up to?” Alan was eyeing him suspiciously.

Gordon snorted. “Just thinking we should drop in on the Europa Extra-terrestrial Marine Expedition on the way back. I owe Gwen a jump-scare.”

His brother tilted his head, obviously calculating the possibility. “Could do. You should speak to Scott.”

That dragged him back to reality. “I guess it depends on Dad.”

Blue eyes darted in his direction. “Dad will be okay. You know that, don’t you?”

Gordon found he didn’t have the energy to get angry. “How can you know that?”

“I don’t.” Alan went quiet a moment. “But then how do you think I manage each time you go out on a mission?”

The aquanaut stared at him. “What?”

“Well, your health has never been and never will be one hundred percent, yet you still dart down to the bottom of the ocean, jump off high places and do things just like the rest of us. Do you think I don’t think of losing you all the time?”

Gordon froze a moment digesting that his little brother still worried about that… “That’s different.”

“Is it?”

“Dad…okay, I get your point. But I’m also worried about Scott.”

“What?” Alan stared at him.

“Can’t you see what this is doing to him?”

“Er, what?”

No, Alan hadn’t seen. “I have never seen Scott so terrified.”

“I repeat – what?”

“When Dad told us he was going. Scott just…” He swallowed. “Dad is hurting Scott and I, for one, am not going to stand for it. Virg isn’t either.”

Alan was staring at him. “You said Dad was cold and didn’t care. Abrupt, yes, that’s Dad, but I can’t believe he doesn’t care.” The astronaut shook his head.

“If he cared, he wouldn’t have come.”

“Gords-“

“Alan, trust me on this.”

His little brother stared at him again. “I trust you, Gordon, you know that. It’s a given. But I also trust Dad. He knows what he’s doing.”

Gordon pressed his lips together. “He doesn’t know everything and I really wish you guys would stop worshipping him as a god.”

“He’s not a god! He’s just…Dad.”

“Yeah, and that’s the problem.”

There was silence after that. Gordon not willing to berate Alan any further. It wasn’t Alan’s fault. He didn’t have the history with Dad Gordon did. He hadn’t had to fight to swim. Hadn’t seen Virgil struggle with his choices.

Hadn’t seen Scott give his everything to his father only to have it…ignored.

But no, that was history. Long ago. Before the Oort Cloud. Gordon had his issues regarding his father. He loved him, but he was a difficult man under all that passion. Being the son of a hero wasn’t everything it could be.

Scott worshipped the ground his father walked on. Gordon, not so much.

To see his father hurt Scott like that…Gordon’s blood just boiled.

“Is Scott okay?” Alan’s voice was smaller than usual.

“That’s just it, Allie. I don’t think so. You know how he gets. Like before the Oort Cloud. I, for one, don’t want him going there again.” ‘There’ being more a mental place than a physical.

Alan’s head dropped. “No.”

A voice rumbled behind them and both jumped. Michael was talking into comms, to Scott, something about the aft sensor array.

Crap. It was a sign of his distraction that he had forgotten the Mechanic was there. He glanced over, but the tattooed man showed no sign of even knowing they existed.

Gordon sighed.

A hand landed on his knee. “It’s going to be okay.” Blue eyes sought his. “It will be, Gords.”

He let out a breath, suddenly wishing he had Alan’s faith.

If anything happened to Dad…

“It. Is. Going. To. Be. Okay.” The hand on his leg squeezed tight.

But Gordon didn’t answer.

-o-o-o-

The drop of the communication buoy saw all of them back in the cockpit. John was the mastermind behind this little exercise and Virgil was, as usual, very proud of his space brother.

The design was ingenious, of course. John had taken a portion of the T-drive technology and applied it to communications. The same Tunnels created by the engine could be used to push what would otherwise be a simple comms signal through to the next buoy at a vastly accelerated rate. His brother had been working with Brains to realise this technology. Back in Earth orbit, a satellite connected the new network to the planetary network. On the way out, they would connect the Jupiter system. On the way back, they would connect Mars. Time delay communications would be a thing of the past.

Possibly as a tension reliever, John’s first signal went straight to Lady Penelope.

Gordon’s demeanour shifted immediately. His excited babbling did much to lighten the atmosphere in the cabin. The uninformed wouldn’t have been blamed for thinking he hadn’t spoken to her for years. Virgil knew for a fact the two of them had had a conversation shortly before they left.

The concept of ‘young love’ made him feel old.

And indicated just how tired he really was.

But sleep was something he couldn’t see happening very soon. Sure, he could try to take a nap en route. Hell, he had to. But his head was full of worry that likely wouldn’t let him rest.

Scott let Gordon babble for a full minute before cutting him off with the mission. Perhaps the commander saw how much the atmosphere needed to be lifted from the black depths they had fallen into.

Virgil hated it when his family argued. It didn’t happen often...okay, maybe they did quarrel every now and again - it came with the territory of working together. But nothing deep like this. Nothing that cut into the core of their very foundation. The surety that held them together.

Virgil sighed.

“Ready for jump.” Scott’s voice was all command and it forced Virgil to focus.

Pre-jump checklist as his brother called out to each of them.

“Airframe?”

“Craft secure. We are go.”

Blue eyes flickered to Michael. “Propulsion.”

“T-drive ready.”

“Helm.”

Alan’s back was tensed, his hand on the lever that would propel them further away from Earth. “Ready.”

The familiar countdown, such a part of their lives. Scott’s voice carried security...and Virgil’s faith.

Alan’s arm moved.

And the Excel jumped.

-o-o-o-

Next

[teledild0nix]

Fic Writer Questions! (you can find me here on AO3 if you're interested!)

tagged by dear @theburialofstrawberries mwah!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

112 yowza!

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

750,421 kinda tempted to go delete one word so it can be 750420 which is a far more Pleasing number

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

12ish but some of them overlap: BBCS/Sherlock Holmes/ACD (these are all different bc my bbcs fics are not the same as my own modern fem Sherlock Holmes adaptation are not the same as my ACD Holmes fic; Good Omens; Harry Potter/The Werewolf Draco Malfoy Cinematic Universe; Captive Prince; The Hobbit; Fleabag (it was a crossover with BBCS but Fleabag is the perspective character so it still counts as a separate fandom imo); Doctor Who; The Office; Parks and Rec; Broad City (one a piece for those last 5 but I AM going to write a Parks and Rec polycule fic for @gaykagome)

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

They're all Good Omens fics from the 2019 Summer of Good Omens! Susceptible to Summer, Fragments Shored Against My Ruin, Something So Magic, Enter Serpent, and Anything We Like

All of those have over 2k except the last one, but average engagement for me is like 400 kudos or so

5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I try! It depends on what's going on with me. Sometimes I just don't have the energy, and I figure people would rather I spend my brain power on writing new fics than on writing replies to comments. Wish I had a fave button tho so I could let people know I read and reread comments, because I do!

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Oh I wrote this ficlet series called A Chemical Defect about John and Sherlock's relationship in s3 of BBCS, and it's WILDLY unpopular. People don't read my fic to cry sad tears I guess! John and Sherlock are having an affair in the story, and it ends with the implication that their relationship is unsustainable and that Mary knows about it anyway. I intended to come back to it after s4 and write a more optimistic ending but LOL! Didn't have the heart.

7) What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

I know this answer is kinda up my own ass, but like. I think stories that feel true to life sort of feel like they end on a beginning if you know what I mean? You don't really consider a chapter of your life closed until you look back on it from the next? SO that said, I think I'd have to say that it's my big BBCS serial The Only One in the World. I spent 2 years writing it, and it ends with John retiring from medicine to solve crimes and write books full time.

Could also be my WDMCU (werewolf Draco Malfoy cinematic universe) series Moonrise, which starts with Draco isolated in his abusive mother's house, trying to cope with lycanthropy essentially alone and ends with him in love and surrounded by found family in a cozy cottage in Hogsmeade, having gotten some lycanthrope rights legislation passed after working at it for years and talking to Harry about whether they want to have kids. Oh man I feel warm and fuzzy just thinking about it

8) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I have written one crossover. It's BBCS/Fleabag, because me and @loudest-subtext-in-tv were laughing about how John seems like one of the horrible guys Fleabag sleeps with basically out of self loathing, so I wrote this fic to make Nattie laugh, and you should read it bc it's so good and so underrated.

9) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not really, but people don't seem to know that authors can read bookmark tags unless you private the bookmark, and someone once put in the bookmark tag on one of my fics 'writing was meh but it was okay.' Okay so why bookmark it then??

10) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Fuck yes! I'm not sure what 'what kind?' means? People fucking? Sloppy, silly, and awkward, with lots of laughing. I also really like writing afterglow scenes which are even sillier and gigglier and often involve one character cooking for another. Food as love language is a very distinct pattern of mine tbh

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of, but occasionally I'll write a post on here where I make some elaborate head canon, and I'll see people in the tags talking about how they want to write fic of it, and it makes me breathe fire out of my nose like a dragon like PLEASE DON'T. The WDMCU came out of a ficlet post I made on here like a year before I actually wrote the 60k series so like!!! Please don't do that!

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! To Russian and I believe Chinese. Not my entire oeuvre but a handful of BBCS and Good Omens fics

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I wrote a fic inspired by an RP I did with my gf right around when we met (actually now that I think about it, it's two fics), and I waaaaaaanna do a WDMCU collab with my beloved Sally @clytemenestras at some point if he has time bc he inspired me to even write werewolf draco with his original lesbian werewolf story

14) What’s your all time favorite ship?

favorites are hard for me? I always think I'm currently doing my best writing lol so I'll say drarry

15) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I don't post fics unless theyre finished, so I don't have any WIP up on AO3, but I did intend to continue with my fem Sherlock Holmes series, Your Many Tendencies. I just haven't been in a Holmes mood for a long time. Maybe I'll come back to it idk. This particular series is honestly very unpopular? People will just straight up say they don't read femslash, and it hurts a lot. This series feels really personal too, bc it's about a Black autistic nonbinary lesbian, so it does hurt my feelings that no one seems to care, yknow? I mean the people who read it are extremely kind and thoughtful in their engagement with it, but it has vastly less engagement than my m/m fic, and that's painful. It gets literally 1/10 the attention my fics usually get.

16) What are your writing strengths?

Almost all of my writing is romance, but I tend to write concurrently about recovery and found family, and I think I'm very good at doing that in a way that connects with my audience. I once had someone ask if they could use my words in their wedding vows, and I've had people tell me they started doing things with their spouse that my characters do with their partners in order to express love. I think about that all the time. My Impact. It makes me feel like I have a real duty to my audience yknow?

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

This question is hard for me like I've been writing so long and so much that I'm literally always happy with my final draft! It's always exactly to my taste, yknow? I suppose I could say that my fics tend not to be terribly plotty but so WHAT? That's beside the fuckn point for me. Plot who? I don't know Her. Also honestly like. Stories feel more True to me when they aren't ruthlessly devoted to plot bc like life isn't like that yknow?

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

If you're not fluent in that language, get a beta who is!!!!! That said, I have written scraps of very simple dialogue in French using mostly Google Translate (sometimes I check w Sally bc he speaks French but I am usually too impatient), and I am perfectly well aware that I take my life in my hands each time!!! Also don't do that bullshit thing where it's in italics? That shit is weird and exoticizing. Just write it in quotation marks like normal dialogue.

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

BBCS babey back in 2012. Ended a 5 year dry spell for me after I got my writing degree.

20) What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Hmmmm I think it's probably gonna be the fic I'm working on now that I haven't posted yet, but I know it's called Names for a House, and here's a tiny bit of it

Thanks again Shreya for asking me to do this bc I really love talking about myself. I tag @the-moon-loves-the-sea, @clytemenestras, @tomiano, @gaykagome and @totallysilvergirl

No pressure <3

[ssaalexblake]

You know, I remember before s12 aired I was talking about how I liked how they’d managed to say something with the casting of Jodie as the doctor Without forgetting the doctor’s socialisation. As in, 13’s anger has been Very feminine in that it deals with repression and hiding it behind 8 layers of denial and not letting people See she’s not a perfect happy go lucky joy machine who just helps people all the time. It made sense plot wise because of what 12’s last wishes were, he didn’t want the bad. He hoped for a future of laughter and kindness, not the kind of things the doctor has ended up with.

The doctors dedication to their own last wishes has unknowingly pushed 13 into somewhat typical feminine reactions in s11, she is being passive aggressive (this doesn’t actually stop, to be fair, she’s definitely being this in her calmer moments in s12), she’s only letting those around her see her positive attributes, hiding her questionable past by avoiding questions. She cornering bad guys alone so only They see her darker side. She’s using them as a pressure valve to vent her anger and disdain openly, because she knows she can’t do so to the fam without violating her own vow to herself.

So while 13’s ways of displaying anger aren’t stemming from being present in a society that socialises women that way, she has effectively ended up in the same place without her behaviour stemming from said same socialisation. Because this regeneration just Suddenly appearing like they’ve been perceived as a woman and socialised as such when they’ve been taken and treated as a man for thousands of years would not have worked.

And I personally quite enjoy this, might as well Say something with the casting, right? And I said this waaaay back when, and I got push back (rudely, but W/e) because why would I enjoy something that’s not a power fantasy of her acting in an entirely socialised male way, and that this whole thing was remarkably lacking in self awareness but like... I actually am thinking as time goes on that it is Very self aware and is serving as a bit of a lesson on toxic femininity.

I... have no idea if this is an arc that was self aware from the get go, but 12′s last wishes could have vastly different connotations depending on whom you say them to. From seeing two seasons of 13′s behaviour in an effort to fulfil them, i think it’s pretty evident that hearing them sent her down a pathway of very unhealthy emotional expressions that i clocked when watching Very early in the eleventh series as a very feminine type of anger repression. 

And in s11, she’s sailing on that. She Kind of slips up in the first new year’s special with the dalek, but other than that life is Good for her. She’s managing to find effective therapeutic venting villains to release the pressure of having to be perfect all the time and it’s not even having too much of a negative mental effect on her. 

Of course, this only holds for as long as life is going well for her, literally the first thing that happens in s12 is the Worst thing that ever could for her. The Master shows up, drudging up trauma related to Bill, relating to hoping against all hope they could be friends again but ending up dying in the dirt alone. He destroys Gallifrey, commits genocide, which would have been traumatizing enough but it would have drudged up all the trauma from when they thought They’d destroyed it and ruined the win they got when they’d actually saved it. The fam whom she loves are now Also in mortal danger and want answers. This all just goes to prove that 13 Only pulled that off in s11 because it was to a level that she could handle it. Once her stress and trauma and anger and hurt reaches a certain level, she can no longer function in the way she wished to and the true toxicity of that behaviour becomes apparent. 

And through all of this, while the 13 hasn’t arrived at these behaviour patterns through female socialisation, she is Presenting in the same way so it functions as a criticism of toxic femininity. 

In Orphan 55 she latches onto Kane Before she knows she’s done anything bad and treats her like dirt to vent the anger, the fam had Already noted she’s in a foul mood and it’s kind of evident she did Not want to take it out on them and used Kane to do it. Then the Skithra happens and she is Brutal and she is so in front of the fam. Fugitive of the Judoon happens and her instinct to hide all of her trauma and not talk and just be Happy is shown from the opening scenes to be causing division amongst the fam and her, she is moody and short and angry At them because she can no longer contain it. By the end of the episode she actually even verbally slams Ryan. That is how far gone she is with all of this. 

fotj is also when the fam Kind of manage to get through to her and show support, she actually is shown to be in a slightly better place in the next two episodes, so we also see that when she functions honestly and Doesn’t lean into toxic femininity her life Improves. 

Of course, then villa diodati happens and it all once again goes to utter Hell and she totally Blows. He screaming at the fam was a total and utter breakdown and it was a Snap. It was a Snap like the other doctors have had, it was like ten at his worst except instead of it being a boatload of ugly toxic masculinity she is portraying this through a lens of toxic Femininity. And people are still on my posts on a weekly basis wondering when 13 will Finally Snap. 

13′s anger Isn’t like the other doctors’ in presentation because her unhealthy coping mechanisms are displaying a totally different side of toxicity in society. 13′s repression and her absolute Need to only display positive traits led her down a road in s12 where she was unable to find help, unable to say there was anything wrong, unable to display negativity in a healthy way, unable to keep the sheer supernova of emotions she was feeling down anymore and it exploded, and it was ugly. She blamed the fam for not knowing things she was deliberately hiding from them. She did Nasty things. Her inability to think straight and her disinclination to Deal with her own trauma and just repress it ultimately led her to give up the cyberium to the lone cyberman which led to Countless trillions, probably, of humans to die in the worst way possible (that’s the doctors Own opinion on that btw, she Knowingly did something that caused this) because her crutches are ignoring the bad and using the fam and earth itself as a second home in place of the old one, for her, the possibility of losing them or the earth is so traumatic and disturbing that she knowingly causes a horror. 

13′s poor mental health, the poor mental health stemming from toxicly feminine ways of dealing with anger and trauma and depression led, directly, to the terrors in the last 3 episodes in s12. It is not healthy! 13 may not have been led to acting in these ways by female socialization, But giving us a justified and logical reason to be acting in the same way women are Expected to act in society to ours (and, everybody’s) detriment Is a commentary on how toxic that type of feminine anger actually Is. 

So no, i don’t think they went ‘power fantasy’ as a route with jodie’s casting as the doctor, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t self aware, instead they chose to say something that wouldn’t have been as poignant a story had they cast a man to play 13, because chronologically and visually... A man told her to do this. It is more complicated, yes, but this Definitely says something.  

13 is a cautionary tale against the toxicity in the anger women are socialised into... A wild one, but since when was the doctor ever subtle.