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josephslittledeputy · 9 months

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G... Gale..;....???

#he really said 'ill show you what that tongue do'#BOY #im thoroughly enjoying his romance so far #him and astarion have honestly been a tie for me idk which one i like more #bg3 spoilers #bg3 #gale dekarios #still silent as a winter night on here but ill come back soon! been adjusting to loving life again & getting stuff done #i can finally make phone calls again without having min 10 anxiety attacks :3 like fr i havent made a phone call in years??? always made #my partner do it for me. but one month into lexapro and ive been able to make all the calls! its honestly so wonderful #anyway nobody asked i know i know but yeah

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dilsdoes · 2 months

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this is so dumb but im having a kind of hard time with my health right now and unironically the thing that might help a lot is a pair of fucking roller skates. and thats ridiculous.

#dils declares #i need to exercise more but literally every excersize that is affordable and accessible to me is actually bad for my fucked up stupid knees.#but rollerskating which i already know how to do and love and havent done in years. is low impact.#i could walk except i live on a hill and dont drive and walking up and down said hill is bad for my stupid fucked up knees.#and like thats better than jumping rope (what im trying) but i do not like doing it. either.#like i hate walking up hill and i dont like walking down hill and theres very little walking thats not that.

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carcarrot · 3 months

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this time last year i was probably sitting in the kitchen while my dad started making an early dinner of chicken bolognese trying not to get too nervous about the concert i'd be going to in a few hours

#the nyc concert was last year. LAST YEAR .#thats so insane like yeah that feels like a year ago but good god the insane amount of stuff that has happened since #but god i remember that day so well #it was cloudy and a little rainy in the morning which made me ough thinking it was a bad omen and wouldnt be as fun #and i remember going to library and printing out my silly letters (i should have just. not done that lol)#and on the DAY OF on the way back home from the library #i even bought a cropped black blazer specifically for my concert outfit. havent worn it since lmao #and my dad and i even watched a movie at lunch #a short movie but a movie nonetheless. lol and even then i was like oghh my gosh excitement and nervousness #and then the car service getting there i felt so fancy and as the drive started the clouds were magically dissipating #so that it was a nice clear evening when i got to the theatre #and then all the insanity of the show. god i cant believe it still after all this time. wowie #going to listen to a playlist of the show setlist im gonna get emotional now. guys........#one of my fave memories is how everyone started standing up as they went into so may we start so i was like ok are we all doing this #and stood up too and then stood for the entire rest of the concert. i think the first 3-5 rows were like that for the whole show #surreal and insane i was front row. those guys were REAL and CLOSE #i was also very excited to notice russells new shoes :) when i wasnt like awooga (how i was 99% of the time)#there was one so may we start jump that was well. yeah. front row baby #i think after latte i was like ok i cant film i gotta just vibe #religious experience doing the 'ah ah ah's during that. really interesting #ok im not gonna go through the whole show again but wowie one of my most insane nights. second only to hollywood bowl #wow what a fun year it was. just so many incredible moments #ok yay 💖 happy one year to all that. love those guys so much #spars #ok not actually done beaver o lindy was INSANE LIVE!!! AS WAS EVERYTHING ELSE. so fun ok now done for real

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penisbilt · 5 months

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the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now

#latimers parents not mine!!!! i am NOT moving back to florida LOL #really hope that the changes will be good for my mental health. this apartment is toxic to us #ive been on the verge of meltdowns Kind Of A Lot lately. imnot doing great #extremely dependent on substances. just to reach a baseline level of functioning. but even that isnt working as much anymore #the only things i do on my phone or tablet these days is like. 2 mobile games. and skirting past my dms to check latimers blog #its too overwhelming to even open discord these days yknow. everything on earth is too much for me right meow #i havent been drawing i havent been social online OR irl i havent been cooking or creating #i havent been keeping up with personal hygiene like at all im particularly ashamed about that one #i've been really bad about doing my T the past few months which is a HUGE shame because im SO fucking hyped to be on it #theres just. too many obstacles in getting it done half the time. and the other half of the time i just forget #anyway. anyway.#our lease ends in july so between now and then we're just gonna try our best to tolerate our living situation enough to get by #there's a light at the end of the tunnel. and its called 'i only have to be in charge of like 2 rooms at most. and not a household!'#we're gonna try to slowly comb through all our things between now and then so the process of moving wont suck as bad #cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now #maybe not for other people. but it is for me. and its okay to let myself come to terms with that #im just. so relieved. still very stressed! but theres at least light at the end of the tunnel and its only like 2 months away #ill be able to draw guilt-free again. ill be able to just EXIST guilt-free #i dont think ive felt guilt-free for just existing the way i do since like. turning 20 #i know my mom wouldve loved if i stayed home forever. and im sad i cant be there for her #but ever since i had a fight with my dad at 15 or 16 it just really felt like he didnt want me there more and more #maybe as the youngest he was resenting that i was preventing him from becoming an empty nester or something. i dont know #because all the other kids had been moved out and on their own at least once but i had never left home before #i dont know if he'd be heartbroken or not to hear that i feeling like he was resenting me. but thats the energy i was picking up for years #i dunno. i dont know #anyway. back to housing. for now im going to try to relax and store energy for the moving process #the huge pile of things by the kitchen? i dont have to worry about that becoming permanent because we're leaving in 2 months #the general discord of the state of our possessions? we have to go through everything to pack it all anyway. we can move in RIGHT this time #when we moved in here we didnt have a car or license so we were dependent on latimers 3-hr-drive-away parents to help us move #just /across town/. and we had a whole month between leases! but it still had to be done in a weekend

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watery-melon-baller · 2 months

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i am writing,,, awful fic,, eugh

#once again working on my lovely shitshow of a oneshot that ive been writing on and off for the past uh. year?#this thing is. a thing i guess #i dont know i have so many conflicted feelings about it. eughh #will i finish it? who knows!#will i post it? who knows!#i finished a scene. which is nice #i have 2.5 left and then the first half of it is done #i havent even started plotting the second half <3 #maybe ill post it before 2025 but thats being optimistic lmao #lilac post

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gornackeaterofworlds · 3 months

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Uhh gang 🫰 due to time constraints I'm only attacking people that attack me, so if u want something u know what to do. Maeva was drawn by YxCaro

#eva is my Marvel oc #caiji is tmnt #matt and maeva are from my own universe #and nora is from case file 13 #it was tough choosing which ocs to put on there #i have literally so many guys #at least 30 and thats just my universe alone. not fandom stuff #finally drawing my sona a little more too lol #gornack text tag #gornack art tag #artfight #artfight 2024 #i missed using multiply+every individual color when rendering my sona #i havent done that in almost a year #gore tw #injury tw #for eva #i havent posted that art have i. i love it too. hmm.#team stardust

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carmarriage · 4 months

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red vs blue restoration blew such huge chunks im actually mad. like completely enraged. and i wouldnt have it any other way. rest in peace you son of a bitch

#like under the conditions it was made. i can understand why it is the way it is.#but i would genuinely be hard pressed to imagine a way it couldve been worse.#they brought tex back. which is like the number one thing they should have never done under any circumstance. leave the poor woman ALONEEEE #wash had absolutely nothing to do except act like an idiot for no reason and Be Crazy. leave him alone too #carolina showed up just to immediately get her shit kicked in. she doesnt even say a single word to tex so what was the point #and i fucking love tucker so im biased but WHAT!!!!! HOW DO YOU DECIDE TO DO META TUCKER AND FUMBLE HIM THAT HARD!!!!#tucker doesnt get a single line reflecting on Literally Being Tortured for (from his perspective) TEN YEARS????#not a single genuine emotional moment for him???? just gets up and says ''oww that sucked. bow chicka bow wow haha am i right fellas''#the blues got shafted so fucking hard. they barely interact with each other. they get no resolution at all.#wash and tucker didnt even talk. i dont think they were ever even in the same frame. if you wanted me to kill myself you couldve just said #also i havent watched s15-17 since they released and i didnt bother with rvb0 but when did doc die. huh #carolina said something about ''what happened on chorus'' and HUH? did i just miss that completely. what the fuck #also where is donut. he wasnt even in this. im assuming something happened to him that i just dont remember during/after s18 but i miss him #sorry for being so mean lmfao i dont usually like complaining so much but man...........#they didnt even make grimmons canon. smh my head #anyway rvb ended after s13 ❤️ yayyy

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haemosexuality · 1 year

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do you want to learn all kinds of things and be a more well educated person? has it been a while since youve thought about killing yourself? school can change one of those things

#i love spiraling #the thought process goes something like this:#im definitely gonna fail this school year→which sucks ass bc i was already supposed to have finished school next year so being held back #again is. not great→why tho→bc im bad at school dont apply myself at all have done jack shit all year and am too scared to ask teachers for #help. bc i have social phobia→why havent i told this to my parents sooner tho and asked them for help? ik they would do anything they could #to help me and wouldnt make me feel bad at it theyve never been like that→well bc im ashamed and also didnt want to put that on them. they #have enough to worry about without their 18 yr old daughter acting like shes a middle schooler→ok well failing the kast year of school would #definitely still be putting that on them tho. theyre gonna have to worry and put plans they had for when u finished school on hold etc. so #ur stressing them out and being a problem anyways→well the best course of action would be to kms then sincs thats the only way i can truly #stop being a problem for my parents forever→oh fuck not this again cmon

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nabaath-areng · 11 months

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I was planning to build new desktop this fall, but seeing that the winter half year practically chains me to bed making me incapable of sitting up I took some of my savings to get a laptop so I can have it in bed for drawing, writing etc at least. And so I'll save back up the coming months and build it once spring arrives instead (hopefully component prices has gone down then too)

All that to say I can only eat my hands as I catch glimpses of dawntrail news after having been ffxiv-less since july last year. my abstinence is out the roof

#that being said i am admittedly a little bit nervous about returning now that its been so long #i played without break from 2014 til 2020 and then its been on an off between 2020 and 2022 #and then since then i havent had the means to play #like on one hand i dont dare looking too much into ffxiv happenings cause my abstinence grows worse #and on the other i worry that ill feel weird coming back #because returning from past breaks have felt weird #which admittedly might be because i dont allow myself to take my time and enjoy things but rather rush to catch up #but whenever i can play im just gonna take all effort possible to not rush and potentially even do things on my own #rather than feel stressed by not slowing down others #im glad for the increased single player options tbh #at the same time the break has done me good cause i feel like im further away from making those mistakes #and having a lot to catch up with before being up to date might be good for me #finding hobbies outside ffxiv has done me good too #my relationship to it wasnt the healthiest as it was my sole lifeline during horrific and traumatic years #but now ive been able to play tons of other games again and read books and draw more and write more than ever #and done more irl things again even finishing one type of education #so honestly? i think itll be fine #i dont have to feel bad over my relationship with the game evolving into a different form #i still love it immensely and its had a profound impact on my life as a whole #both in terms of friends and creativity and also significant other #anyway that got longer and rantier and more personal than i first intended #peace signs and sparkles

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orcelito · 11 months

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Ok though its actually kinda nice to see some of my earliest rps... 15 year old me just having fun 🥺🥺🥺

Might go digging more later. Don't rly feel like getting That into it tonight lol

#speculation nation #the funny thing is that back in 2013 u could still edit people's posts #which with rp i used that to delete old responses so that the posts wouldnt get too long #for the purposes of rp this worked WONDERFULLY so the threads wouldnt get too long on dashboards #but it's also kinda insane to remember that we could just... do that. change posts. fuckin wild Genuinely.#but ahhhh baby me's early writing... so nostalgic #i had 3 characters in this roleplay group. had a lot of fun for the time that i was there #since then tho i havent done any roleplay blogs on tumblr. only ever done one on one roleplays with a select few people #and dnd lol. which counts for the roleplaying aspect.#but for the Writing experience. rp was very definitely a huge thing for the development of my writing.#feeling a little bit emotional almost thinking about the many many words ive written in my life to get to my current skill #ten years ago i was 15 and just messing around with some characters i enjoyed #and now here i am with 663k words uploaded to ao3 and thousands of kudos across all my works #kinda makes me emotional. ive come a good ways since then.#and i have MORE PROGRESS TO GO 💪💪💪💪 i will keep at it. bc at the end of the day i just really love writing.

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wvrlock · 11 months

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ooc

#i keep thinking of my heckna campaign (it's always on my mind and has been for over two years yeah)#but ummmm yeah my players can never find a day to play #i love that campaign i love playing it with them but it's a bit exhausting being the only person trying #there's one of my players who joined recently and was a spectator until very recently who's responsible #but aside from that im the one chasing after them always #and im... well #im attached to them as players and do have fun witb them but truth be told I don't really consider them friends anymore #they did some questionable things to a mutual friend #and i told them i wanted to talk about it because it upset me but that wouldnt change our relationship #because they had done nothing to me personally #but we never got to talk. in fact we havent seen each other in person for almost a year #when they know im unemployed and frankly free on most days #they never text me first either and we only talk about rp-related stuff #which doesn't really hurt anymore? they aren't my friends but they're my players and im okay with thar #but now... yeah they're kinda elusive as players as well #i know if i go and tell them i want to drop our campaigns i will lose them for good. there is nothing between us anymore #that does sadden me a little because they aren't bad people and i have loved them so so much #but... yeah they didn't make any efforts as friends and now they don't do it as players either #i think i could be able to put together a new table to be honest #because i do want to run heckna. it is a campaign that means so so so much to me #and... well i can live without dragon heist i suppose? i was really invested in my player's dynamics #and relationships with npcs #and i was SO excited to see it develop... but i don't think that's gonna happen in... idk years?#im just... thinking.#i could be my 'game day' to. you know. actually play something #ooc #negativity cw

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volfoss · 11 months

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Watching 3 saw movies back to back did shit to my brain tonight

#twist rambles #we watched 3-5 :) which was super fun but AUGHHHHHH i am thinking about amanda again. i hope we all blow up #keep thinking about how my moot said John loved her like a bullet loves a gun bc well. he does and it makes me LOSE IT #very excited to get to 3d tbh. but I havent done a full watch through for years so im so :) idk. very fun genuinely

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arolesbianism · 1 year

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Bro what do you mean endori is only 4 events from the graduation event. Stop it stop it Now

#rat rambles #band posting #bro theyre on the yukiran event rn with crying ran its so jover #yall arent allowed to be catching up thats illegal #well ok saying theyre catching up is egagerating a bit but still thats so scary #I only noticed this because Ive been thinking abt yukiran again because I alas love them still and I found out thats the current event in en #bro once mygo is in en thats rly when its going to be jover #and you know if endori does succeed in catching up one day theyll be in shambles immediately afterwards #although who knows I havent been keeping up with endori so maybe its miraculously become a functional english server again #like idk endori has never been perfect but at least its almost always been more usable than ensekai lol #bro the song list ui alone is enough to make me wanna beg ensekai players to delete it #its ridiculously ugly and unprofessional and also I hate a lot of the english names for songs (~close to grey~ is the big one for me)#also just in general ensekai is incredibly ugly and unstable even by sekai standards and it has done nothing to earn my trust in any regard #like idk if you care at all abt the actual rhythm game part of it I see no reason to not get the japanese version #like I get wanting to have a convienent place to read all the stories translated (even if I do Not trust the translators)#but like even with bndori which I started and played on endori for well over a year I still ended up drifting to jpdori as my main #the massively expanded songlist and up to date events just seem impossible to give up to me if you know how to access them #like ofc I wont go yelling at ppl to play on jp servers (plus theyd make multilives Much more unbarable) idc that much lol #but still I think if you can its a good idea to make a jp account if only so you can play jp exclusive songs if you want #this applies to both sekai and bndori to be clear although Id forgive an endori player for wanting to savor the old ui while they can lol #sekais new ui is fine but bndori's is literally sooooo ugly such a massive downgrade #also while I dont hate the new art direction as much as some ppl I definitely think its worse than the old one by a lot #its so dusty now </3 #anyways I got off topic there time to stop talking

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isabelguerra · 2 years

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paranatural would be so good if the characters had intended symbolism and core beliefs and things behind them that drove a specific meaning. rather than being tools for shonen anime pseudomocking

#like all joming aside the comic is funny but thats it. its funny. its made to be funny. it has some wacky lines gets some good reactions #its funny. but i dont think its a good story anymore.#like let’s really think about this for a moment. what is paranatural about.#4 years ago i wouldnt said ‘kids fighting ghosts in their wacky hometown’ but theh havent done that in ages. theres no trace of that story #and there hasnt been since chapter 5 ended #digging further- thats just plot. what is it ABOUT? the power of friendship? the perseverance to protect the ones you love?#i used to love max for his down-to-earth straight man grounded perspective. max wasnt funny. max was reasonable and the contrast of that #reason against the nonsense of the town is what MADE him funny.#like the other day when i posted the comparison between ch4’s hallway specshot scene and the one from fridays page #max isnt being funny in the hallway. ‘why am i here’ is put against Haha Woww So Deel Max Lol to which he can reply no i mean study hall.#his reaction is rational. the sarcasm adds humor but its rather the world around him which is so newly strange that his normalcy is funny #and then versus the new page. max makes a Why Am I Here joke again. but this time the question is not asked by max the character who wants #to know why his father has dragged him to a kids entertainment zone. but rather is asked as the setup for an #Unexpected Quirky Classic Max One-Liner ‘no i meant on this earth why do i exist’#it just feels so much flatter. max isnt aloof and uncaring and sarcastic because he doesnt care about anything or anyone and is untouchable.#max is standoffish but genuinely nice and caring for the people he meets. his first instinct after landing on johnnys face #is to ask if hes alright. when PJ feels distraught at not being important in his own death maxes first instinct is to find a way to make him #feel better. to challenge that perspective and doubt the viewpoint his own poor self esteem gives him #when isabel comes out of her spirit trance and is too shocked to move max immediately rushes to her side to protect her against a spirit hes #terrified of. and then the next day brings what happened up to her and says hes sorry she went through that and hes got her back #he BREAKS HIS ARM TO PROTECT JOHNNY AGAINST HIJACK #hes a good protagonist because even though he has trouble connecting to others and being super friendly hes still NICE!!!! he still CARES!!!#i might take these tags and just make them a new post this turned into loving max hours #paranatural

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pendraegon · 2 years

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rattles the bars of my leopard enclosure HIIIIII HOW ARE U

if u were a clouded leopard i would cut u out of ur enclosure and then i'd get sent to jail hiii xin<3

#HIIII i went out to brunch today with a few friends to this cute bistro ^_^#had the eggs florentine and they were lovely!!! went on a walk through the gardens for like 2 hours which felt great #but also wait oh my god. something so scary happened which was that my roomie told me that she knows some #people in my year and major and they all know who i am but i have no idea who they are so im like. oh god. please i do not wish to be #memorable i havent even done anything cool yet here why do u know me 😭#how are u!!! kissie kissie kissie

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todayisafridaynight · 1 year

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Snap you are the king of sexy funny back when you did Yamtien just goes to show you have a talent for humor and cheesecake.

there's something about the title 'king of sexy funny' that's really tickling me thank you so much anon ill take that crown with honor

#snap chats #please 'king of sexy funny back' was my fathers name #the joke is that my dad would Nonstop play Sexy Back in the car every day he drove me to school. also hes funny.#which was every day while i was in elementary. and then he and my mom got into the Theyre Practically Divorced fight #and then Love The Way You Lie was added to the playlist theyre filipino they dont believe in divorce yk the works #not even a fight my dad just finally called her out.... anyways...#thats a dusty as hell crown i havent drawn yamtien in literal years #OH YEAH I DID DO SEXY HUMOR I GUESS I REMEMBER SOME OF MY COMICS BEING SUSPECT AS HELL #but of course... need the funny....#im a different man now. i havent done humor like that In Literal Years 2x #like truly the last time i did that WAS those comics #what even was the last sexy or sexy/funny thing i drew...... its just been family sitcoms in my brain for months now....#checking my folders hang on OH JO yeah.#ASIDE FROM THAT THO i really dont do anything. Saucy anymore #someone remind me to delete that actually ive been meaning to go on an art purge but i keep getting side tracked #not a MAJOR one just ones that keep bothering me #ik on the internet eveything is forever but id like to scroll through my own blog without getting flashbanged by stuff i dont like anymore #ive been meaning to delete some ao3 fics too but again... keep getting sidetracked...#THIS TAG RAMBLE IS SO DAMN LONG IM SO SORRY utterly off track.

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