#which liek yeah you already told me to do that man. like yeah.

[babsaros]

i will kill manager i will smasha his head with a rocks

[lpsluvblr]

Well well well, I'm glad to hear my man now permanently took place in your mind as well. Believe me, now that he's there he won't get out, uh oh. And so, more:

- I kinda told this to you already, but most of the time when trying to tell a joke/pun he's unable to actually finish because he starts laughing at it before it can even leave his mouth. And this is kinda related so I will add it here that he also wheezes a lot when laughing especially laughing hard

- he doesn't have a dog but if he ever had one he would want it to be one of the big dogs, like a golden retriever or maybe even something bigger. Basically, bigger than him when standing on its hind legs, one that technically looks intimidating because of its size but with him is a gentle,

- ok, so since you said you're alright with more murdery stuff, a headcanon that if in some au or timeline or whatever he was a murderer (like a full-blown serial murderer who kills mostly for fun, not for self-defense or anything justified) his like trademark thing would be severing off all limbs of his victims. This only really works in anthro au or rather just whenever he has a tail, and so he'd be like "You know, when my tail detaches from my body it always grows back, I wonder if your limbs will do the same." So yeah, he severs off all limbs of his victims, especially tails if they have one (it's sort of deviation he has). I also think that the way he would lure his victims would be liek this - in some remote location when he sees someone he'd act like he's suddenly really hurt so they come to him and don't think at all that he could be dangerous right here and now. That's all I have for now, but maybe some other time I will send more about this au timeline whatever it is

- if some animal happened to stray into his yard or anything like that he'd be completely alright with it and try to befriend whatever animal it is and maybe feed it etc if he can. He doesn't super insist on it but if he can, then cool! Sometimes some of those animals come back to his yard to get food and stuff, and as their trusts grows they sometimes even walk into his house. And so it is not uncommon to see for example a fox just walking around his house - "Um, Vinnie, there's a fox in your house downstairs, I think it came inside because you left the yard door opened." "Oh, that's all good, it's probably Rudy." "...Rudy?"

- ok, so, Captain Cuddles and Vinnie. Hear me out, they're not like super good friends or anything, but they have a sort of language connection. The first time Vinnie met Captain Cuddles and found out he was french as heard him talk in French he had that nice feeling. Vinnie doesn't understand French and Captain Cuddless doesn't understand Italian, but the two languages are similar enough that when one speaks their native language the other really enjoys hearing it, even if he doesn't understand anything. But still, there's something familiar in it and nice

- I honestly don't remember if I said it somewhere before?? but oh well, I don't think so. His mother, my version of his mother at least, looks nothing like him. He's short, she's really tall especially for a female, her complexion is a bit darker (like, still white, but nowhere near his pale complexion), she doesn't have any freckles at all while he has them basically everywhere, her hair is black and curly while his is straight and ginger and more, which does make him happy, he doesn't want to look like her. However, there is one thing that they share and it's the worst possible one in his opinion - eyes. They're the same shape, color, heck, he swears even their eyelashes' lenght is the same. It's not enough to make him dislike his eyes or anything but enough for him to sometimes flinch when he unplanned catches the sight of his eyes in the mirror

- it happens very rarely but every now and then he has an existential crisis when he really wonders "What the fuck am I actually doing with my life?". It especially happens when he sees his reflection in the mirror and takes a longer, good look at himself. In those moments it dawns on him that he's an actual human being who will have to live actual future and that all in all it depends on him

- right after crying he doesn't feel relieved or like the burden got a bit off of his shoulders, his first emotion after crying is feeling just empty. There's nothing there, nothing behind those eyes, just hollow. The need to cry disappears, sure, but at first everything else disappears with it too

Ok, next time I will probably send more but those are just a few I wanted to send before going to bed :3 hooonk mimimi

Omg this is such a nice thing to wake up to more?!? I meant what did I do to deserve this? Ok ok let’s go!

- lol yes and I can’t see it so clearly and like I said I swear pepper has a big influence on why his humor is broken I feel like she would send him jokes in texts and all his roommates would hear is fits of giggles and snorts from his room go to ask him what’s so funny and he wouldn’t be able to get it out and also Also he’d pick the worst times to try to tell the joke like someone would be super busy and he would come up like “wanna hear a joke?” And they’d say “sure, real quick though I’m kinda busy” and he just takes forever to tell it and they’d just 😐 at him the whole time.

- ok this! He’d also probably let the dog get away with more then it’s supposed to and buy the dog all the cool collars and accessories and teach it so many tricks so he could show off how cool his dog is plus Vinnie loves a good cuddle buddy I love that for him!!

- This is one oh buddy this is the one I’ve been waiting for ok sooo he’s so psycho I love it just how easily he can do it just because in the show he showed everyone how easily he can just put things out of his mind so he would just love normal day to day like nothing ever happened and you have told me before how messed up his life is so this makes sense he’d just do it. I do have questions though: does he still have friends and all that? Are there certain people that are spared or can it just be anybody at any point in time? Don’t get me wrong. I’m super invested in the Vinnie murder series and any more head cannons you have about it. I would love to read. I just don’t know how to express into words how much I see what you’re going for and how much it makes sense. Especially with your Vinnie and Sunil murder Sims that’s why I feel like what started at all. Because him murdering loan is amazing but like a Bonnie and Clyde situation, just roped me in. I just 🤩pls do more if you have them ever!

- this one I know Russell would have an absolute fit over and Vinnie wouldn’t understand why. he’s like the Snow White of his time and no one understands. “But penny ling does it” “they come in all the time it’s fine” “I haven’t gotten bit yet” “Rudy’s cool bro just chill”

- awe he found a bro that understands I mean may not understand him completely but it’s so sweet someone who gets him outside his friend circle I’m glad to see him getting comfort every once in a while. Bonus: *Vinnie walks by pepper and C.C talking to each other* “Pepper I like this one you can keep him” * then he just walks away* pepper: 🤨 C.C: 😊

- if anyone meets her they’d probably think Vinnie was joking when he said that was his mom and he’d have to reluctantly say with a sigh “ look at the eyes” id image he’d wear sunglasses a lot more often to make it easier for himself and he just tells everyone it’s for cool factor If love to dig more into their past! I know you’ve told me a lot does he still talk to her as an adult I’d love to think no or rarely which good for him why be reminded of the woman who mentally tortured him he has his eyes enough to do that! Oh poor Buddy!!

- ok honestly I see this one happening because of his parents like you said his mom always wanting him to be perfect and he doesn’t see himself that way and like he’s not good enough but also being completely normal because I feel like everybody gets to that point where they’re like I’m real! what am I doing? And it doesn’t last too long, but it’s long enough to make itself a core memory that he’d think about from time to time, and then it would happen again a long time later like déjà vu and it makes him feel so sad and wonder why he’s here. It’s the eyes darn it like a trigger! That’s why I love having Sunil be his decider so to speak the one who gets them to where they need to be so he wouldn’t have to worry about it so much but when he’s doing it on his own, he’s completely lost.



- This omg is it because he hurts so much that crying does nothing for him anymore? is this why he rarely cries in front of people or for himself? this poor baby needs some happiness in his life! Gah that one got me he’s just not happy anymore! Which is maybe why he started murdering that would make so much sense nothing to live for no ability to cry. I wonder if it would make him feel better in a way or it’s like an addiction. Gosh here I am back on murder. Lol

- Yes I now have a one way ticket one your Vinnie express and I don’t plan on getting off anytime soon. It’s just such a fun time. I love these so much and anytime you want t send more go right ahead. I’m gonna work on doing the same for you because honestly, you deserve it 🫶 I appreciate them all! 



[axemetaphor]

im definitely not ripping off my friend by making a list of au ideas i have no siree //gonna slap this under a readmore cause i. well i say a lot. all of the time. i tried so hard to format this Good but tumblr fucked me up i am so sorry

so first-off i know i already have one WIP AU (Auckland) on ao3 so i wont talk about That one cause like. spoilers. i actualyl have it like 80% created so its likely gonna truly get finished for once and i dont wanna ruin shit

the other one ive posted about is something me and ben (catgirlrepublic) have worked on together its not at all close to done or anything but it's. a fun little crossover. Between jdate and my fuckinuhm. Original characters story “Untitled Villains Project”. the sketches of the comic version ive started is actually my pinned post 👉👈 its like the first chunk of the story, i think half of part 1? yea.

Tldr john fucking Somehow is able t oget into contact with a certain curious scientist from another reality who’d just love to study the Soy Sauce, most certainly not for her own nefarious purposes

John and Dave meet up with the scientist, her name is Boss, and her lab assistant, Toxic, and after a bit of a preliminary Vibe Check where john determines her trustworthy (which Dave doesnt agree with,) the two agree to be taken to the world UVP is set in. from there they stay in Boss’s lab (big old fucking abandoned military lab). John and Toxic are fast friends due to mutual love-of-chaos. John n Dave get to fuckin, camp out on an air mattress.

The day after they arrive, the two get split up, not exactly intentionally; big plot points of UVP are liek. Fueled by Boss sending Toxic to go fetch her “research materials,” which are usually important artifacts

Fuckin side note i guess i have to explain my dumb bullshit: Boss’s, uh, field of expertise so to speak is actually fckin, basically the scientific study of magic and superpowers n shit like that. This shit’s all real in that world. Toxic’s got fuckin superpowers, so do 4 other main characters, whatever. It’s got a bit to do with spirituality, iss Boss’s hypothesis. So she has Toxic fetch important artifacts that might have “energies” to them. The thing is actually way more fuckin complictated than that, this is just Boss’s initial hypothesis.

Motherfucking anyways. So Boss gives Toxic a job to do, and John get excited about how Cool that sounds, and ends up going with Toxic, leaving Boss and Dave alone. Neither is thrilled about this. But Dave and Boss get to have a bit of conversation (while Toxic and John are off bonding and having a good time) and come to a… mutual grudging understanding of some kind. They still dont like each other though lmao

Theres gonna be deeper shit going on but we havent sorted it out yet/tbh havent like Written For It in a while but i still like thinking about it a lot lol

Also pretty sure our endgame is john and dave steal toxic and bring them back with em lmao boss is kind of not nice and toxic would most certainly be better off in Undisclosed. Actually theyd fucking love it. Theyd become a local cryptid im sure. Undisclosed’s mothman is a teleporting spike baby.

I have. Another crossover AU that i might. Post something about for halloween? Maybe? If i have it finished?

Crosses over into, you guessed it, another one of my original-character projects. God, am i vain or something?

I promise this is just because i think blue and dave should get to team up to beat up some monsters

Quick briefing on my fuckinuh. Original character story, this one doesnt have a name (yet? Idk lol my work never actually goes anywhere sso who gives a shit). It centers around two grim reapers, Red (26, bi woman) and Blue (22, aroace agender asshole). In this reality or whatever, grim reapers function kind of like low-level office workers. They get told who’s going to die + when by some middle-management types, and upper management only involve themselves when punishment needs to be doled out. These Higher-Ups can be seen as analogous to Korrok; they’re decidedly not human, never were, and fucking terrifyingly powerful. Additionally, grim reapers are sort of .. designed to be “background noise” people. In reality theyre supernatural beings and, uh, look Real Fuckin Weird (the whole deal has a neon aesthetic im terrible at drawing uwu) but most humans just perceive them like extras in a movie. A body’s there but the camera’s not focused on it.

To the narrative: the shit starts when Red n Blue get relocated to Undisclosed. Relocation is something that just happens every now and then to reapers; they usually work in teams, but they get split up into different cities to avoid any strong bonds forming (a counter-union strategy from the Higher-Ups).

Red, Blue, John and Dave end up running into each other for the first time in a McDonalds where John n Dave are getting some 4am “hey, we just survived another horrific monster fight” celebration burgers. John and Dave are the only two people who can see how… strange Red and Blue are. Nobody else notices.

John unintentionally pisses Blue off, leading to Blue whacking him upside the head with a dildo bat. They all four get kicked out of McDonald’s. Dave and Red both are less than thrilled

Blue and John end up resolving their differences, somehow. Red and Dave briefly bond over their dumbass best friends being, well, dumbasses. They all part ways amicably.

somehow-or-other (idk yet) they end up running into each other a few more times, and eventually john invites them over to his place, and the four (plus Amy now!) get to know each other a little better

while there, Blue gets a text about some guy who's gonna die and John offers to drive them to where that's gonna go down. they take him up on the offer and get to have a bit of one-on-one conversation

after that ordeal though Blue has had Enough of people and bails, leaving John to head home alone

theres a sort of mirror-development going on with the five of em. Red, John, and Amy would all like everyone to get along, though theyre a bit tentative about it (John moreso than the other two, actually, jsut cause. well Red n Blue could still be Sauce Monsters). Dave and Blue on the other hand do Not like people enough for this shit, and Dave's not unconvinced theyre Sauce Monsters. he will not trust them until proven he should

the story's kinda nebulous but i got an idea for some Shit going down that involves both Sauce Monsters and also the Higher-Ups to have some fuckin absolute chaos go down.

Oops! All Trans

Everybody is transgender. Everyone

Ive actually workshopped this one both with ben (catgirlrepublic) and ghost (ghost-wannabe) lmao its a fun lil concept ive had from the get-go cause i mean. What’s an internet tran gonna do other than hit all their favourite media with the Everyone’s Trans beam

Dave transitioned post-high school and faked his death for it. People go missing in Undisclosed all the damned time, after all. He moved to the next city over, transitioned fully, then came back as a completely new man. Yes i know this doesnt exactly fit with the “everyone knows David from high school” thing alright, hush.

Anytime anyone brings up John’s old best friend (pre-transition Dave) John throws an entire fit like an overdramatic grieving widow. Full-on sobbing “why would you bring her up?! I miss her so much—” to the point that people just stop bringing up because Jesus Christ That Sure Is Uncomfortable KJHGFDS.

This is a scheme he and Dave came up with prior to Dave leaving, though Dave hadnt exactly anticipated John putting on this much of a performance about it— but it’s stopped Dave from ever having tto hear his deadname again, so hey.

Amy transitioned sometime in middle school/early high school. Her family was super supportive and loved her a ton and most people just know her as Amy. she was super shy her whole life really so. Yeah. people just dont think to bring it up lmao also i Feel Like big jim would absolutely wallop anyone who gave her trouble of any kind

John’s nonbinary (genderfluid specifically) and not exactly Interested in transitioning ? like hes fine with how he is. mostly.

he came out to Dave in high school but hes not out to anyone else exactly. Maybe his bandmates. Probably any other trans person in Undisclosed knows, too, cause theyre safe to tell lmao. Johns mostly a “he/him out of convenience” kinda nb who’s cool with any pronouns but does prefer they/them most. Dave and Amy use they/them when the trio are alone

Also this is a totally self-indulgent caveat that i think would be great, Dave’s actually agender but because he's transmasc and transitioned when he thought there were really only two options, and being Boy at least felt less weird than being Girl, he just kind of assumed he was a dude. It’s only through a lot of (like fucking years and years hes probably in his 30s/40s when he puts 2 and 2 together on this one) talks about gender with John that he realizes he actually feels like No Gender. Masc aesthetic with none gender.

I Just Think It’d Be Neat Is All Okay

Also Amy came out to Dave about being trans early on in them seeing each other and his response was to get very nervous before blurting out “me too” and then just being too embarrassed to talk about it for the rest of the day. Hes got a lot of hangups on talking about it actually it takes years for him to get comfortable in that

by contrast when Amy comes out to John about it his response is to yell “EYYY ME TOO” and give her a big ol hug lmao

I think itd be neatt if Amy ran a like. Transfem help/advice blog on tumblr. Kind of helped-with by John who can give her transfem nb insight for certain asks. I also just think that would be neat.

Cowboy AU - i put this one last cause its got drawings to it actually. Theyll be at the bottom

Basically just. Hey you ever watched a western. I think they look neat

This is another one me n ben have come up with lol

The soy sauce and all that shit still exist, im not sure where korrok fits in yet but ill figure it out

Theres no real like solid narrative yet ? but heres the barebones of everybody’s arcs.

John

Johns an absolute troublemaker, Of Course. Hes wanted in several towns for absolutely stupid shit. Hes a loner who shows up, causes chaos, gets drunk, does some drugs, runs away if people get too mad at him

He definitely had the same kind of deal with the soy sauce as in canon— he was at some kind of party, somebody offered it, he took it cause why the fuck wouldnt he, now he can see monsters and shit

Hes kind of a mooch also. Like. dont let him stay in your barn man he’ll never fucking leave and drink all your booze.

He runs into Dave when they happen to just, cross paths in the same town. the bullshit John stirs up ends up involving Dave in a way that makes it seem like it's his fault too, and they both get run out of town

after that he just tags along after Dave. hes decided this guy's Cool he wants to stick around. Dave is pissed at first, but not enough to shoot him or anything, and eventually, John grows on him

Dave

Dave also is a loner but unlike John hes simply so fucking awkward and bad with people. He doesnt feel like he belongs anywhere so he just travels

He’s the stereotypical Lone Ranger tbh. He wanders from town to town, solving their problems, though hed deny its out of any moral obligation (it kinda is, a little bit, tbh. He does like feeling useful). He shows up, fixes things, leaves. He's kind of a legend but most people think he's hiding something dark. other people jsut know him as that guy who farted real loud in the middle of the saloon and promptly skipped town out of sheer embarrassment. you know how it goes with Dave

He ends up involved with the Soy Sauce when a snake (not Actually a snake,) bites him. The snake’s more like the wig-monsters, really. Anyway, it injects him with the soy sauce, he fucking trips balls in the middle of the desert, he can see monsters now

He runs into John and shit goes tits-up, as said, but they become traveling buddies after that. he'd never say so, but he's glad for the company, actually. it's nice. hes not used to companionship but he feels a strange kind of easiness hanging out with John....

not sure how the Monster Dave concept will like fit in to this reality but like. trust me i want it in here. I'll Figure It Out.

Amy

Amy’s been living in a town John and Dave end up passing through and she is very curious about these two new Handsome Strangers who claim to fight monsters and just kinda. Persistently tags along til they let her join for real

Her family’s all dead, unfortunately, just like in canon, and she’s been living alone for a few years before meeting John n Dave. she had nothing left in that town to stay for, she'd been fantasizing about escaping on wild adventures for a long time and this felt a little like a dream come true. (Dave still gives her a spiel about how Difficult it is, but really, her fantasies were pretty grounded-in-reality already. i jsut think thats how she is, yknow?)

Shes the first person to react to the whole “we see monsters” shit with a kind of “oh, okay. neat” kind of response lmao

John and Dave fix whatever the fuck is up with her town (maybe that’s where the Korrok shit can fit, who knows) and Amy ends up being integral to that. After, she insists they take her with them because “they need her now” and Dave just cant really say no. John too is very much "the more the merrier!" and hes actually glad to have another person along he loves people lmao

At the start she has long hair but after she joins them she chops it short with a knife for convenience

also she still is an amputee. justt. idk. it was a wagon/stagecoach accident rather than a car accident lmao. just to clarify since i hadnt mentioned it, i wouldnt rob her of her ghost hand or yknow. all of the significance to her character that Missing A Hand has. although also now im going to have to research what was used as painkillers way-back-when, but im betting shes still got, like, her pain pills, they probably had those, maybe i wouldnt have to try too hard there. old timey medicine could be WACK though,

Shitload

Yeah hes in tthis shit mostly cause i liked designing his cowboy self lmao

Hes a kid (like 16, 17, technically i think in those days that was more Young Man than Kid but whatever. Hes Young i mean.) who got possessed by the Worms out in the desert and, by his family’s perception, just went missing!

Hes also a wanderer, but he ended up at the same town john and dave met in, at that same time, and starts following them after, already aware of who/what they are.

He keeps his face covered 24/7. actually he covers a Majority of his self for reasons. kinda want him to be a slightly more horrifying Worm Entity rather than human idk,

I kinda dont have much for this boy yet sorry Shitload

images !

with some editing notes for me cause im doing a very specific aesthetic with this lmao. i might change some lil details/colours though ...... idk

im also kinda 🤔 about shitload's colour palette. i want things assoicated w the sauce to be black'n'red predominantly but i think his palette might mirror dave's too closely. also im working on a korrok design i jsut am too busy to draw it now

[edzasks]

The shirt Courtney is wearing is different yo the personalized one Sarah is wearing. I don’t know about a necklace but he has spent a lot of money on doing stuff with her. I’m just saying Zac has put a lot of trust in her very quickly it seems. He only knew her since November but she was staying at his in December already but then at Sundance he was liek be careful who you trust. Like he’s trusted her so soon and so much with everything that’s why it comes to me like dating but idk

Okay, this is going to be my last-forever commentary on this subject and I’m being serious, I’m going to stop answering questions about her until she pops up again cause it’s pointless and I’m tired of it. Whether he’s dating her or not, honestly who cares. Though here’s my actual opinion on it and I’m going to cut the bullshit and not hide like last time because I was afraid of getting hate so I zipped it. A blog wrote out why they don’t think so, I’ll just copy and paste most of what they said on here. Buckle up, cause this shit is long.

I do not think they’re dating for a variety of reasons, the main one being Alexandra Daddario. When Sarah was with him and he came out of surgery, who was he thinking of? Alexandra. His speech was slurring as well, so he obviously had to take medication even asking where Alexandra’s whereabouts and missing her while showing a framed photo of them. You’d think if he was dating Sarah, why would he ever have another girl on his mind when his ‘girlfriend’ is right by his side, and if he’s so “madly in love with her” which every anon says…  Fresh out of surgery, again why is he thinking about Alex and misses her asking where’s her @ if he has his GF?

I also do not find it a coincidence that Sarah is has massive blue eyes and tall, who does that remind you of? …… C’mon.

For the other reasons I do not think they’re dating is just basic timing, age, and or whatever. His love-life is none of my business. If you want my honesty, I feel like the BIGGEST bitch talking about it too. I hate talking about it. I need to stop answering anon’s about it.

Anyway, I do not ever think he’s going to hop into a relationship when he just said all that, (”be careful who you trust.”) It sounds like his last relationship really fucked him up. Poor guy has been through hell it seems, it makes no sense for him to trust a girl asap and be like, “we’re madly in love!”

Secondly how does that even work? The guy is filming in May in New Orleans (maybe somewhere else), is Sarah going to keep flying out every 2 weeks just to see her ‘bf’? Especially when he’s working? Let’s talk common sense here, why would she move to LA with him when she’s a Denmark swimmer? Swimmers have team, she’s an Olympic athlete, is she going to throwaway her entire career, JUST to date Zac? How does that work? Their whole relationship would be long-distance barely seeing one another, I don’t think Zac is the long-distance type, hate to say it. Look at how he was with Sami and Vanessa, he’s always with his gf’s.

He was never alone with Sarah either. Always with friends, always in a group. Reminds me of Pete and Ariana. Ariana never alone with Pete like kids. Her sister also does the same thing as her, she was aboard in SA I was told for the same amount of time Sarah was for her swimming career too, so just cause she was in LA, means nothing.

I just can’t understand why a man and a woman cannot be friends. If he’s dating her, then let it come naturally, not stalking her page every minute of the day. It’s not fair to him, her, or whatever. They did the same shit with Alex and it turns out Alex friendzoned the shit out of Z. 

Anyway, the idea of Dylan liking her stuff doesn’t mean anything either. Dylan follows Alex and likes all of Alex’s photos.

So yeah that being said, I don’t really gaf if I’m wrong or right, whether the fuck people say on Twitter, at this point I’m actually tired as fuck hearing about Sarah because I feel like the biggest bitch going on about his dating life and that’s the truth. If I’m wrong, I’m wrong. Y’all gotta stop holding an internet gun to my head though, fuck, who even cares? The guy is going to be an Oscar nominee soon, why is a chick nobody knows anything about the priority? COME ON?

[chatpeach]

Apartment AU Chapter 7: You Could Call It Luck

Hello! I don’t remember my usual format for posting fics on here so please bear with me. Anyways this is that chapter I had sitting in my drafts forever and couldn’t bring myself to finish it or post it because a. motivation is broken and b. I’m a full time student and it be like that. It’s not 100% my favorite writing but please enjoy! 

Read it on AO3: Here!

Adrien was pretty much entirely convinced he was going to get fired, no matter whose son he was. The morning had played out terribly; he was stumbling over the other model, posing unnaturally, and despite his best efforts, his smile looked more like a grimace. The director of the shoot was furious, to say the least. Despite how many times he told Adrien to take a break and clear his head, Adrien continued to make mistakes he hadn’t made since he was a teen.

He couldn’t stop thinking about Marinette.

He couldn’t figure out why he was so hung up on what had happened the night before. Sure, maybe it seemed like she could potentially be using him to get to his father, her being a designer and all, but there were people who had done much worse. Men and women alike who had tried to get close to him to advance their modeling careers, and people who had tried to sabotage him. He had even had anonymous death-threats sent to him and his father.

Thinking back, he was pretty sure none of them had bothered him as much as this.

At his break for lunch, he took the opportunity to text Chloé back after she had sent him an incomprehensible drunk text that night. It wasn’t unusual, and often times he would reply to them during the day when his hangover had subsided.

1:43AM Chloé: drieen this guy i wnet home with was terible just liek terribleeee god how lame

1:43AM Chloé: thtat the last time i go home with a MAN

1:44AM Chloé: its onyl ladies from here on out babeye!!!!!!!

12:10PM Adrien: uh Chlo, i have no idea what any of these mean

12:10PM Adrien: “babeye” ?

12:12PM: Chloé: i don’t know what you mean, those are TOTALLY readable

12:12PM Chloé: the guy i went home with last night was a huge bore and i’m swearing off men forever, duh

12:13PM Adrien: ooooh okay yeah that tracks

12:13PM Chloé: anyways how is work? i’m suffocating over here, i have like 400 meetings in the next 2 hours

12:14PM Adrien: uh it’s not great honestly, i’m totally out of my mind here

12:14PM Chloé: did you drink too much last night? adrikins i told you to stay away from tequila

12:16PM Adrien: no, i just have something on my mind

12:16PM Adrien: or, i guess, someone on my mind

Adrien watched the small bubbled that indicated she was writing continuously disappear and reappear on the screen as Chloé typed out and deleted her messages at a rapid rate.

12:18PM Chloé: WHAT? WHO? TELL ME WHO THEY ARE

12:18PM Chloé: ADRIEN AGRESTE YOU TELL ME RIGHT NOW

12:18PM Chloé: is it someone i know?

12:19PM Adrien: she’s just someone in my building, and it’s not like that

12:19PM Adrien: i’m pretty sure i made a huge mistake last night and freaked out at her without giving her a chance to explain

12:19PM Adrien: and now i’m pretty sure she’s pissed at me

12:20PM Adrien: pls help :(

12:20PM Chloé: omg

12:20PM Chloé: i like wouldn’t even stress about it, just like say you’re sorry and flirt with her or something

12:21PM Chloé: you know, like really turn on the charm

12:22PM Chloé: like idk buy her something with diamonds in it or something, poor girls love diamonds, like you can even have some of the ones i’m giving away (they’re so last year but she probably wouldn’t be able to tell)

12:23PM Chloé: omg hold that thought i’ve got to go, they need me in this meeting! let’s meet up later for dinner! ciao sweetie xoxoxo

Adrien stared at his phone for a while before signing and slipping it into his bag. Chloé had the best intentions (usually), but she wasn’t great with advice. You know who would give really great advice in this situation, he asked himself. Marinette. He shuffled back to the studio and prepared for another four hours of botched photo shoots. His hatred of the work he did only increased with the number of mistakes he made, and he almost wished they would fire him.

What seemed like an eternity passed, and finally Adrien was able to leave work. He met up with Chloé at their usual place, a high-end club that, thankfully, also had a quiet bar area where the two could chat. Chloé was already sitting at their usual table when he arrived, tapping away at her phone and sipping a gin and tonic.

“Hey Chlo, who ya textin?” He gave her a quick peck before sliding onto the stool across from her.

“I was completely serious when I said I was swearing off men, Adrien. I’m texting this cute girl I met at one of my events a little while ago.” She shot him a smug look and continued texting. “I’m never even looking at another man ever again,” she huffed. “Except you, of course, but we all know you’re off limits.” She said in off limits a breathy voice, raising her eyebrows. “It would be gross to even think about it.”

Adrien chuckled. “You’re right, that would be gross. Even though you were so in love with me when we were 14,” He snickered.

Chloé practically shrieked. “Ugh! I told you never to talk about that again! How embarrassing,” She shook her head. “I was just convinced I liked you because I didn’t know any better. Now I know that I’m way out of your league.”

Adrien laughed again. “Alright, alright, you make a fair point. You’re totally out of my league,” he said, humoring her. The playful tone of his voice was not convincing, but Chloé chose to drop the subject altogether.

“So, who is this mysterious person you’re having trouble with? What could you have done to piss her off so badly?” Chloé put down her phone on the table for the first time since he had arrived and looked at him intently.

“Ah well... you know how everyone is always trying to get close to me so they can meet my dad or get some kind of modeling gig, whatever it is really. Well... I kind of accused her of trying to do the same thing, which now that I think about it, I really doubt she was. She’s a designer, and I saw a flyer for my dad’s competition on her desk, so I sort of freaked out?” Adrien shrugged, looking embarrassed.  “I had also been drinking, which didn’t help. I mean, when I told her who I was she seemed genuinely surprised that it was me, but seeing the flyer made me immediately assume she had the worst intentions for being my friend. You know what I mean?” He was sure Chloé knew exactly what he meant. She was staring at him with a look that was practically dripping with sympathy.

“I know it’s hard sometimes to let people in because we’re afraid they want to use our status, but if she didn’t even know who you were before, maybe it was a misunderstanding? I don’t know anything about the girl and frankly I don’t like the idea of you hanging out with a designer,” Chloé made a face. “But I think if it’s really bothering you, you should ask her what her side of the story is first, and then you can talk it out.”

Adrien stared at Chloé. “Chlo that’s actually... Really solid advice, thank you.”

She gave him a smug look and shrugged her shoulders. “What can I say, I’ve matured a lot since we were kids. It’s you that needs to grow up now,” she pointed at him with a mocking tone, but the look on her face was one of brutal honesty.

Adrien knew this was true, of course. Chloé had, apart from her party habits, matured far more than he had since they were teens. He had always considered himself a pretty level-headed kid, and only realized later that there was so much more bubbling beneath the surface of his feeble good-boy model persona than he knew. He was angry, and he was bitter, and he was going to have to change that.

——————

It was a little past midnight when Adrien finally made his way back to the apartment building. He was glad that, instead of dancing and drinking at the club like they usually did, he and Chloé had stayed up late at her house, marathoning movies. It was just as they had done as kids, except instead of the rare soda their parents would allow them, they sipped on wine.

The landlord was long asleep when he walked through the lobby. He climbed the stairs to the apartment building quietly, careful not to disturb his neighbors. Most nights he would stumble up the stairs in a stupor after partying without worrying about how loud he was being, but tonight any of the wine he had had at Chloé’s was well out of his system. He felt strangely nervous tonight, being back in the building. It wasn’t because Marinette lived there, although he was nervous to see her again. It was an anxiety he couldn’t quite put his finger on—something just didn’t feel right, and he couldn’t tell if it was his sobriety that was the cause of his discomfort, or something amiss in the building.

He was so deep in thought as he walked up the stairs that he almost passed the second floor without noticing that the door to apartment 204 was slightly ajar.

Marinette’s apartment.

That’s strange, he thought, slowly making his way closer to her door. This… isn’t right. She’s not the type of person that would leave her apartment door wide open.

He felt the hair on the back of his neck raise as he heard shuffling coming from beyond the door. A knot formed in his stomach as he carefully pushed the door open as quietly as he could. It was completely dark inside, and the muffled shuffling continued, now accompanied by voices coming from somewhere further back in the small apartment.

A sharp scream pierced through the darkness.

Adrien rushed in.

—————

Marinette had come home earlier after some light errands. She had forgotten, in her giddiness earlier that day, to pick up some supplies for one of her latest projects. It was one of her best pieces, really—a soft, delicate dress made of some of the most difficult material she had ever worked with. She was hand-stitching the beading into the top of it, through shear, light fabric, and had the bottom flow out and behind the legs, nearly resembling the tail of a jellyfish.

It was almost ten now, and she planned to pull an all-nighter to finish the dress so she could show it to the design team she was working with the next day. Humming softly, she made her way up the stairs to the second floor, thankful to finally be back at the apartment. She balanced her bag of materials in one hand as she fumbled with her keys. When she went to unlock the door, however, she noticed something odd. There were strange scratches around the keyhole, ones she didn’t think were there before. She inspected them for a moment, wondering if she had accidentally scratched the door, or if Adrien trying to get into her apartment that night did the damage. Putting the thought aside, she opened the door and stepped into her dark apartment, leaving it ajar behind her.

“Tikki! I’m home! Here, pretty kitty!” She said loudly into her apartment as she flicked on the light to the entryway and placed her purse in the closet. She passed the bathroom door and clicked on the light in the living room. Panic rose in her chest.

There was only silence.

The fact that Tikki didn’t come when she came through the door signaled to Marinette that something was very wrong. She always came to her, mewling enthusiastically at the return of her dear owner. She needed to leave, she needed to go find help. There was someone in her apartment.

Slowly, Marinette backed up, careful not to make any sounds. Her eyes darted around her small apartment: bedroom light is off, kitchen light is off, no one is in the living room.

The bathroom.

Marinette whipped around just in time to see the face of her assailant as he knocked her unconscious.

…

Marinette woke up in the dark. She was still in her own apartment, on her own bed, with all of the lights turned out. At first she thought she had dreamed being knocked unconscious, but as she awoke she realized that her mouth was taped shut and her hands were tied behind her back. She laid still for a moment, assessing the situation. She had been knocked unconscious, and now she was being held captive in her own apartment. Panic gripped her and she thrashed about in the bedding, crying and struggling to break free. She looked around frantically in dark for anything that could cut her free. If only I really did keep a knife under my pillow, she thought absently.

She heard a sound in the darkness that made her freeze.

“Shhh, Marinette. Struggling won’t help you, sweetheart,” the voice cut through the dark and sent chills through her spine. A figure cloaked in shadows stood in the corner of her bedroom. “I’ve been watching you for some time now, and I know no-one will come to help you at this hour,” The figure cooed.

Marinette tried to speak, but though the tape came strangled noises instead.

“The baker’s daughter, so sweet and innocent. It was love at first sight. The first time I stepped through those doors I knew instantly that you had to be mine.” The figure came closer, stepping into a small patch of moonlight that came through her bedroom window. “But you never even saw me, not even when I was standing directly in front of you.”

Marinette caught a look at the figure’s face in the moonlight. He was vaguely familiar as a regular at the bakery, but she had never had more than a couple casual conversations with him about the pastries or the weather. He was right—she had never noticed him. He was unassuming, and out of the hundreds of people that had passed through her parents’ bakery while she worked there, she hardly even remembered him.

She would now.

He stooped next to her, clicking on the light at her beside. The sudden brightness made Marinette flinch. He grabbed her by the shoulders and, against her struggling and crying, sat her upright on the bed.

Caressing her face with the back of his hand, his bland face cracked open wide with an eerie smile.

“You are so beautiful up close,” he cooed. “When you stopped coming in as often, I grew tired of waiting for you. I didn’t know how to live without seeing your face every day. You broke my heart.”

He stood up. “I know you’ll come to love me too, Marinette. I’ll do anything for you, anything you would like. I’ll take care of you as soon as you agree to come with me.” He gave her a sympathetic look. “Those bindings aren’t very comfortable, are they? It hurts me to see you like this.” He thought for a moment.

“If you promise not to scream, I’ll take the tape off you mouth? Let’s have a talk.” As he said this, he pulled a knife out from behind his back and held it firmly in his hand.

Marinette had been scared before, but at the sight of the knife she recoiled, shaking violently. Tears streamed down her face as a million thoughts raced through her mind. She thought about Ayla and Nino and how she needed to design the clothes for their wedding. She thought about the projects she hadn’t done yet. She thought about all of her friends, scattered about Paris now, years after school had finished. She thought about her parents, just down the street, asleep in their beds.

Among all of these thoughts came a quiet plea for help. Please, she thought. Please, anyone. Please save me. She thought of him.

In an inexplicable instant, she knew that he would come. There was no denying the feeling in her gut that he was nearby, that he was going to come by her apartment, maybe to apologize, or maybe just to pass by on his way to his own apartment. Whatever the reason, she knew; you could call it fate,

You could call it luck.

She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. He’ll trust me if I seem calm, he’ll trust me if I comply. She nodded, and the tape came off.

Adrien, please.

She screamed.

It all happened so fast. Her bedroom door slammed open, revealing a disheveled Adrien, green eyes sharp with anger.

He lunged at the intruder, grabbing his wrist and pushing him against the wall. The man struggled out of his grasp and leapt forward at Marinette, who was sitting stunned on the bed. Adrien quickly grabbed the man from behind, and Marinette could have sworn his eyes were glowing a piercing green. Spinning him around and slamming him into the bureau across from her bed, glass bottles were sent crashing to the floor. He snarled into the mans face like a wild animal.

“Don’t you dare,” He panted, his voice strained and rough with anger. “Touch her.”

The man panicked, slashing out wildly in front of him, but Adrien was too quick. A sharp pain shot through his arm as he felt the knife graze him, but the adrenaline in his system won out, and he moved with trained speed.

Grabbing the arm he had just tried to strike him with, Adrien pulled it behind the man’s back and, and sweeping him off his feet, he slammed him face down on the ground. Grabbing the closest blunt object he could find, Adrien hit him across the back of the head, hard enough to knock him out but not hard enough to to any serious damage. He scrambled around the room, searching for something to tie him up with, eyes settling on a phone charger thrown carelessly on Marinette’s bureau. After making sure he was tied up securely, Adrien’s full attention was on Marinette.

He rushed over to her, panic and concern written across his face. Using the knife, he freed Marinette’s hands and helped her remove the tape from her mouth. “Are you hurt?” He asked, looked her over several times.

At first she seemed paralyzed, sitting stiff and dazed, blue eyes wide and wet. She looked at him, searching his face for a moment. He saved my life, she thought numbly. She realized that he was shaking.

All at once feeling returned to her, and she crumpled into him, sobs wracking her body.

“I w-was so stupid!” She sobbed. “My door!” Was all she could say.

“Shh shh, it’s okay now Marinette.” He wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her hair. “I’m sorry I didn’t get here earlier.”

Marinette looked up at him, tears still dripping down her face. “You shouldn’t be apologizing, stupid alley cat. You came at just the right time.” She tried to smile, but it quickly turned into a grimace. “I thought I was going to die. I really…” She trailed off. “Thank you, Adrien.”

It was his turn to cry. Tears welled up in his eyes as he looked down at her, and he pulled her in close once again. His voice cracked as he spoke.

“I was so worried about you, the minute I saw your door open I knew something was wrong,” he said, his voice muffled by her hair. “I’m so sorry about getting angry at you, about the thing with the flyer. I didn’t even give you a chance to explain yourself, and I said all of those things…” Adrien hugged her tighter.

“I know you didn’t mean it Adrien, I know,” She said, reaching up and stroking the hair out of his face. “We can talk about this, but first, we should really call the police.” She gave a half-hearted chuckle, still shaking with fear.

[solarianradiance]

Jellyatinous Rose

Calliope: Welcome lovelies, to oUr little get together for an adventure throUgh the Use of a Role-Playing Game system called DUngeons & Dragons! Tonight we have a new player joining in oUr dUngeon delving, oUr lovely friend, Roxy.

Roxy: hey erebody, its ur gurl roxy!

Dave: hey rox

Rose: Welcome to the game Roxy, nice to see you came tonight~

Kanaya: Pleasure To Have You Dear Roxy!

Jade: nice to see you again!

John: glad you could make it tonight!

Roxy: tnx 4 the warm welcum gaiz, makes me feel good bout this venture here

Roxy: so, when do we start playin?

Calliope: Shortlym bUtt first, we shall introdUce oUr varioUs party members for the road ahead, so that we may give oUr newest addition a chance to Understand her new chUms? Jade, why dont we start with yoU?

Jade: ok!

Jade: im a level 5 chaotic good gnoll ranger called groche’a, and i was ousted from my tribe for not wanting to plunder tombs for bones because i was scared of waking the dead and having them get revenge on us... which they did! im the only survivor!

Roxy: wats a goll? Roxy: *gnoll

Jade: a gnoll is a dog person

Jade: like this!

Roxy: oh so ur a hyna furry basically then?

Jade: well no, im more like a malamute husky, i actually based my character off of bec and what jake told me about my scratched other self

Roxy: yeah, ur gilf self was pretty smokin for an old lady, so i can c y u chose her

Jade: ...what?

Calliope: Lets keep this train of introdUctions going, Dave YoU’re Up love!

Dave: im dave, and im a barbarian. im a level 4 chaotic good guy i guess, gettin my rage on with my magic shit talking sword and doin all kinds of awesome shit!

Roxy: u men like connan the barbarian?

Dave: no, not liek conan Dave: *like Dave: fuck

Roxy: wats ur backstory?

Dave: im a kickass barbarian, i showed up one day and started kicking ass, what more backstory do you need?

Roxy: that sunds lame

Dave: youre lame

Calliope: Moving on, John, how aboUt we introdUce yoUr character?

John: im Salamon of the Hearthlands, a level 4 neutral good halfling jester!

Roxy: wats a halflin?

John: they’re pretty much just hobbits but a bit more... “earthly” i think would be a good word to describe them? they’re sort more vice than virtue and do things like eat a lot of food, take whats not theirs and breed like rabbits.

Roxy: le gasp, ur a bunny boy! that sounds adorable!

John: heh, no, im not a bunny, but i guess i am bunny-like in that sense

Jade: you know, that would actually be a good fursona for you

John: eh, nah, its not really my thing, besides im more like a tiger

Jade: hahahaha! no you’re not!

John: in fact i think would be more like tigra from thundercats

Jade: i said no. you’re fucking. not.

John: uuuuh!!!

Roxy: calli!

Calliope: Yes Roxy, what is it?

Roxy: can u make jon into a bunny boy?

Calliope: I... can, bUt I need a good reason like a magical invocation or something like that, I cannot simply do as I wish with the players whenever I wish.

Calliope: Besides, the game has not started. Rose, why dont yoU go next?

Rose: 𝐼 𝒶𝓂 𝒶 𝒩𝑒𝓊𝓉𝓇𝒶𝓁 𝐸𝓋𝒾𝓁 𝒟𝓇𝑜𝓌 𝒩𝑒𝒸𝓇𝑜𝓂𝒶𝓃𝒸𝑒𝓇, 𝒞𝓎𝒶𝒾𝓃𝑒 𝑜𝒻 𝐻𝑜𝓊𝓈𝑒 𝒢𝓊𝓁’𝒢𝒶𝓃. 𝑀𝓎 𝑀𝑜𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇, 𝓌𝒽𝑜 𝒹𝑒𝓈𝒾𝓇𝑒𝒹 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓂𝑒 𝓉𝑜 𝒷𝑒𝒸𝑜𝓂𝑒 𝒶 𝒫𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓈𝓉𝑒𝓈𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝐿𝑜𝓁𝓉𝒽, 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓈, 𝐼 𝓈𝓁𝒶𝓎𝑒𝒹 𝒽𝑒𝓇 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓊𝓈𝑒𝒹 𝓂𝓎 𝒩𝑒𝒸𝓇𝑜𝓂𝒶𝓃𝒸𝓎 𝓉𝑜 𝓇𝑒𝓈𝓊𝓇𝓇𝑒𝒸𝓉 𝒽𝑒𝓇 𝒶𝓈 𝓂𝓎 𝓅𝓊𝓅𝓅𝑒𝓉, 𝒷𝓊𝓉 𝒶𝓁𝒶𝓈, 𝓂𝓎 𝓅𝓁𝑜𝓉 𝓉𝑜 𝓉𝒶𝓀𝑒 𝒸𝑜𝓃𝓉𝓇𝑜𝓁 𝑜𝒻 𝓂𝓎 𝐻𝑜𝓊𝓈𝑒 𝓌𝒶𝓈 𝒻𝑜𝓊𝓃𝒹 𝑜𝓊𝓉 𝒶𝓈 𝐼 𝓂𝒶𝒹𝑒 𝒶 𝓂𝒾𝓈𝓉𝒶𝓀𝑒 𝒾𝓃 𝒸𝒶𝓈𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓂𝓎 𝓈𝓅𝑒𝓁𝓁 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓀𝑒𝑒𝓅𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒽𝑒𝓇 𝒻𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝓇𝑜𝓉𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓉𝑜𝑜 𝓆𝓊𝒾𝒸𝓀𝓁𝓎, 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝐼 𝒽𝒶𝓋𝑒 𝓈𝑒𝓃𝓈𝑒 𝒷𝑒𝑒𝓃 𝒾𝓃 𝑒𝓍𝒾𝓁𝑒 𝒻𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝓂𝓎 𝒽𝑜𝓂𝑒 𝑜𝒻 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒟𝒶𝓇𝓀 𝐸𝓁𝒻 𝒞𝒾𝓉𝓎, 𝑀𝑒𝓃𝓏𝑜𝒷𝑒𝓇𝓇𝒶𝓃𝓏𝒶𝓃, 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓃𝑜𝓌 𝓅𝓁𝑜𝓉 𝓂𝓎 𝒾𝓃𝑒𝓋𝒾𝓉𝒶𝒷𝓁𝑒 𝓇𝑒𝓉𝓊𝓇𝓃 𝓉𝑜 𝓇𝑒𝒸𝓁𝒶𝒾𝓂 𝓂𝓎 𝒷𝒾𝓇𝓉𝒽𝓇𝒾𝑔𝒽𝓉 𝒶𝓈 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓈𝓊𝓅𝓇𝑒𝓂𝑒 𝓇𝓊𝓁𝑒𝓇 𝑜𝒻 𝓂𝓎 𝐻𝑜𝓊𝓈𝑒, 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓅𝑜𝓈𝓈𝒾𝒷𝓁𝓎 𝒶𝓁𝓁 𝑜𝒻 𝒟𝓇𝑜𝓌𝒹𝑜𝓂~ 

Roxy: ur kinda given me the willies theres rosie

Rose: Hah! Thank you! I try to accentuate the nature of the Dark Elves as much as possible~ I am a Level 5 Necromancer by the way, just so we are clear.

Calliope: That was a nice sUrprise, always good to see dear ole Rose to give Us a performance and bring a little life throUgh characterization. Now, for oUr last member, Kanaya!

Kanaya: Salutations, I Am Mildred Of Baldurs Gate! A Neutral Good Human Cleric Of Lathander. I Am Level Three And I Am Looking Forward To Keeping You Out Of Trouble, As I Am The Primary Healer Of The Group. Though I Can Take A Swing With My Shredder Axe If I Wish, I Can Be More Than Helpful In Most Situations! 

Roxy: i dunno boit that but i think ill be hpy 2 have u round when the magical shit hits the fan! Roxy: *about

Calliope: Well, now that we have oUr standing party’s introdUctions oUt of the way, how aboUt we have Roxy introdUce Us to oUr newest member?!

Roxy: what bout u calli, whats ur character?

Calliope: I am the DUngeon Master, I recant the tale to the party based on the actions and decisions they make. Technically, I am all of the characters that are not part of the party! BUt I do have a rather sUltry lass that i have been meaning to play for a while. When my tenUre as DUngeon Master is Up, I shall pass the responsibility of rUnning the game onto others and break her oUt!

Roxy: rly? what is she? tell me!

Calliope: She isn’t finalized, but shes a YUan-Ti Magician, specifically an assistant. Haven’t qUite figUred oUt if shes a fUll-blood or a half-blood.

Roxy: a yankee?

Calliope: A YUan-Ti is more or less a snake person, mUch like myself I sUppose. I’ll admit shes a bit of a self-insert, bUt I made her for immersion for flarping. John helped me in crafting her!

Roxy: oh... he did now, did he?

John: yeah! it was actually pretty fun! learning about the lore of the snake people was kinda neat!

Calliope: Indeed! And in retUrn, helped John create another character to pair alongside with her! He is also a Magician, and she acts as his assistant!

Roxy: assistant huh? does that mean you can make his magic wand

Roxy: disappear?!~♥

John: whoa! roxy!

Calliope: Making a Magicians Magic Wand disappear is childs play.

John: uh calli, thats not what she mea-

Calliope: BUt making his wand spit magical glowing seed, now thats the magic~

Calliope: Mwah!~♥

Dave: whoa-ho, damn!

Rose: Ooo, how racey~

Kanaya: I Must Admit, That Got Quite Raunchy Awfully Quickly!

Jade: you can do that?!

John: ok! moving on! time for your introduction rox, before this turns into a smut campaign.

Roxy: how do u know that it wont turn into 1 when i do get my intro on? ;)

John: rox!

Roxy: relax! im jus teasin y Roxy: *u

Roxy: ok, my character is xerox gundalf the pink! shes a level 1 chotic good gun wizard!

John: gun wizard?! that actually sounds cool!

Jade: that actually sound cool, maybe ill roll one next campaign!

Dave: gotta admit, that does sound pretty bitchin rp as

Rose: Um, Roxy, as creative as that is, “Gun Wizard” isnt a valid class within the ruleset of DnD.

Roxy: wat? naaah, its fine! got xeroxs character shit filled out and everything! even drew her!

Roxy: c? kickass sex witch! put a spell on u make u her enchanted slav! put a magic bullet in ur butt and set her enemies on fire! abraka-sexbang!!

Rose: But we already have a Wizardess! Why don’t you be another class, a legal one such as a Rogue or a Thief?

Roxy: those dont sound legal 2 me sister, sides im a rogue in real life! i dont wanna play a rogue i wanna b a badass gun wizard! calli help me out here

Calliope: Mmmmm, well, while technically “GUn Wizards” are not what they are called, “GUn Mages” are in fact an actUal class! So I sUppose thats no significant issUe

Roxy: gasp YAYS!

Rose: Wait, “Gun Mage” is an actual class?

Calliope: Why yes, it is! QUite the interesting one too, might even roll a character to play as one myself at some point!

Rose: Well, anyways, as I said, we already have a Wizardess, which is myself. So how about you roll Up a Rogue? John can moonlight as one, but he isnt able to specialize as one. Here, lemme just get you started and roll you a character right now!

Roxy: uh, no, imma play a wizard!

Rose: We’ll make her Neutral Good, for maximum opportunity while still being approachable. Some good Dexterity for all of that lockpicking you’ll be doing.

Roxy: rose, water u doin?

Rose: Dump all the skill points into stealth, traps, and lockpicking!

Roxy: ross! Roxy:*rose

John: you know i could just spec into those skills myself, i was planning on doing it anyways!

Rose: We can make her pink, with some blue trimmings~

Roxy: stahp!

*Roxy latches onto Rose’s pen hand, preventing her from drawing further. The two devolve into a bit of a struggle*

Rose: Stop... getting... in the... way, Roxy!

Jade: you do know you can multi-class in this game, right? as in you both can have both.

Roxy: well i don.. wann play... fuckin rogue, i wan be... a wizard of bullets!

Rose: We need a Rogue to-*is bitten*-FUCK! ROXY!

Kanaya: What Is Happening?

*Roxy and Rose devolve to a mother/daughter/sister squabble between petty bitches who both want the same thing, but are unwilling to share, complete with hair pulling, bites, scratches, clothes ripping and an assortment of name calling.*

*Its a good ole fashioned cat fight yy’all!*

Jade: shouldnt someone stop this? like kanaya, isnt this your thing?

Kanaya: ...I... Want To, But I Think I Am Enjoying The Sight Of This Conflict? Should I Do So Anyways?

Dave: with them? nah man itll sort itself out eventually. just let em get tuckered out.

John: ... roll for initiative?

Calliope: Haa! Hahahaha!

[stan-and-the-newbie]

A kpop newbie’s reaction to LOONA

you know i had to do it to ‘em

Alexa: bold

Alex: italic

okay so today you're reacting to Loona!

o, noice

they just debuted like two days ago and everyone is crying

damn. ok but do any of them speak english <<

y es

n  u  t

i believe i already told you, they built this Loonaverse, and released a girl each month

yeh, you told me a few things

right. all of them have an animal and a color. the first five girls have an additional location, then the next three girls have a superpower, and the last four girls have a fruit

...alexa. t-twelve

yeah

<-<

>->

alright fam hit me up

okay, the first girl that was released, back in 2016, is heejin

damn she looks like a disney princess

she does;;

this is aN INSULT

isnT IT

someone arrest her, she's not allowed to be so cute. it is illegal.

how old is she and what does she do

uhh she's 21and she's a singer

she iS BORN IN 2000

... ALEXA WE'RE MOVING TO KOREA PACK YOUR SHIT

ill give you her music video now

alright

the location is hard to guess, so just try to guess her color and animal

hmm

*ViViD*

i'm not watching this u freak, you know about my arachnophobia

y tho. there are no spiders

THERE IS ONE IN THE THUMBNAIL, BIG AND RED

there are no spiders, so play the song, its good. no girl has the spider as her animal u coward

the song's aight. i'd listen to it in a cafe. her animal is obviously a bunny and her color is either red or white. asian girls with thick thighs are too powerful alexa. someone needs to do something about them. it's a health hazard.

omf. her color is actually hot pink;; but u got her animal right lol

o damn. well pink is the mix between red and white isn't it >>

ooOOO

pFFF

she's part of the first subunit, 1/3

ah, so she's a colonel

omG. i mean, y'know, subunits are some of the members that form like a band of their own and put out music

with 12 bloody members, i can imagine

loona has three. anyway, a few things about heejin

hit me

she’s a whole cutie

o gee i couldn't notice

sdfdsdf she likes dad jokes and randomly breaks into silly and awkward dances but she doesn't care. she's also afraid of pigeons 

the guards would have to restrain me from pinching her cheeks if i was ever in the same room with her. and to be fair those things are chaotic evil. one literally flew into my face once.

omf

they also carry diseases similarly to rats. except they fly. so yeah, i can see why one would be afraid.

she also named a rabbit from the set "heekki". hee from her name, and kki from the korean word for rabbit, tokki. and proceeded to ask if she could adopt it.

that's adorable go away i am stone cold

is there anything else u want to know about her. her location is paris, and the first ever video of her beside her mv was her repeating random french phrases she knew in the airport

pfffF.

the next member is hyunjin

they’re all so pretty i cry

they are :(

they are like porcelain dolls, but without the creepiness of a doll, just the beauty and cuteness

i KNOW. so, how old is she

hmm 20 and she's a rapper

she is ALSO born in 2000 ;D and she's a singer

i-

here's her music video

after mark's video on that cat game, the thumbnail horrifies me

o-oh

alight so her animal is a kitteh. so she's the neko of the group, noice... is this a thriller film, geez.

ghjkjhghjk its just a kitten smh

an e v i l kitten

cats cant be evil. her song is very kdrama-ish

her color is... i honestly have no idea

her color appears in the first third of the video

green? blue?

she wears it

lemon

yeh, yellow. and yes her animal is cat lol. what about the song? it’s a drastic change from the last one

ok that last part horrified me. idk it's a weird mix between depression and a drug trip

so, about this baby. her location is tokyo, and she is the savage one

o-oh

shes the one that kept a blank face on a rollercoaster while the others were screaming. also, she really likes bread and croissants

and she's not a rapper smh. well, she does have a pretty voice.

she does~ and shes really sporty, practiced a lot of sports before becoming an idol

alright, off to my wife. this is haseul.

and no photo makes her justice

i-

UGH queen

that jawline fam

i’m sorry i just. literally have never seen such a beautiful woman

alright by now i'm about 70% convinced that these people are created in underground governmental labs

m e. aight, how old is she

fucc it, she's uhh 18

she's actually born in 1997 dfgfdsdfgh

OF COURSE. sigh. that's just my luck

but i understand u

they all look between 15 and 20 anyway does it really matter- i- she's more pretty than she is cute. respecc.

this is her music video

her color is bleagh. i mean bleuugh. blue

omf

she's a parappa the rapper. but she's also a singer. idk her voice sounds like she can rap. was that plane just there and they used it or did they buy a gigantic plane prop for the video

(i really hoped alex would say this because this video exists)

i-

she’S TRYING. her color is green but her location is iceland so liek,,, i guess the writers clashed ideas

blasphemy. they should have went for turquoise

her animal is a dove. she’s also the leader of the group, and the mom friend #1. she can speak english but she has a cute accent which i Love

awh

aaaand she’s a seal enthusiast

o. that's something

they went to iceland so she was like "omg a seal!!! hi !! that was a seal!!"

pffa whole cutie

she is :( she’s also really funny

anyway, the next one makes me feel worthless. this is yeojin

another flawless creation of the secret korean labs

her age?

that tissue-printing chamber in that korean lab from avengers 2? not fiction - they use it to create idols. uhh 19

:D she is 15!!!1

...

and turns 16 in november !!

Goodbye. Tty later, i gotta pack my stuff

dfgfdGHJH here is her song. its very cute because, well, shes a child

L O L I C O N    A L E R T. those three dudes are terrifying. is that the joker wearing a frog head

mmmmaybeh

this is weird lmfao. aaand there's the foot fetish

you’RE HORRIBLE

why is the frog dude going all roaring reeo on her only to give her a fucking present

well, its a song about how she doesn’t want the relationship to move too fast, so she doesn’t want to kiss the dude just yet

that ending was just... idk man. this one broke me. her color is red, and her animal is a frog because that's the only animal in the foreground here idfk

her color is orange, close enough. the other members call her "bean" because shes the youngest and rlly smol and chubby.

awh ;;

and everyone treats her like a baby lmao

well, what did u expect. hmm i think i like the first one the best so far

o, alright

so, these past four girls and the fifth one form the subunit 1/3. the fifth one was introduced through the subunit's first song, but i'll give u their second song cuz its Better

*check out “Sonatine it’s superior*

basically, these girls have a very dreamy concept with a lot of piano and strings. the fifth girl is the pink haired one, and baby yeojin isn’t here cuz her grades were dropping lmao

i-

shhhh just listen to the song

this song gives me the sad

u gotta appreciate the animu songs

i do, i was literally gonna say that this one somewhat reminds me of miia's second song

same !!

her color is W H I T E like my teeth. p u r e  w h i t e

she haS HER OWN mv

o

the fifth member is vivi

shes chinese and the oldest

from communism to idolization. noice

i-

so she's wot, 21? 22?

yeh, shes turning 22 this year

noice

here’s her song

a break from the animu songs. ps: they dont come back

sad. kinda stalkerish fam

ikr. shes a hooman here. but in the subunit mvs she’s an android

what

idk fam they go all out and no one knows whats happening

i am gonna get bashed for this but when she smiles her cheeks look kinda weird she kinda looks like a chipmunk? but not in a bad way

ghjkHJ she does;; shes cute though

yeah

her color is her haircolor lawl. pastel rose

o, nice

and her animal is deer

so she's basically bambi gotcha

she speaks english, and shes the reaction memes queen. and shes also very smol

awh ;;

alright, we're done with 1/3. is heejin still your favourite?

yepp

cuz we're entering girl crush land

o h

the sixth member is kim lip

LISTEN YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO DO THIS

she’s cute tho

of course she is. they're all cute perfect goddesses. i'm noticing a pATTERN HERE

hey, shes mostly a tsundere

well, ngl, she looks like one

sdfgfds

she chose charmander tho 10/10

here’s her amazing mv. her animal appears for 1 second here so lmao good luck. her color is very obvious

white, at long last

the other one

FUCK

SDFGFDSD

red?

yes

that building is aesthetic would hang out there with my weird friends 10/10. the song is odd, but it's nice

i think the song really suits her voice

it does! that's why it works

her animal is an owl

n o i c e

also in one of her vlogs all she does is talk about food. she also keeps the members company while theyre shooting their mvs!! and shes also a reaction meme queen. she sings, but her main strength is dancing

yeah, i can tell

oh right !! she is in the odd eye circle subunit, and these girls have super powers. imma tell you now, the odd eye circle members are in different planes. like, theyre in different dimensions, not the flying planes lol

umm alright..?

anyway, her super power is speed. aaaand i think thats it with kim lip

the next one is a fan favourite. jinsoul

oof. idk man the blond is weird

oh, is it. i dunno, i feel like it suits her.

hammers in that "created in an underground lab to be flawless" vibe. idk, maybe a darker shade? like a golden blonde?

most people choose her song as their favourite

singing in the rain? is tom holland gonna come in and dance to "umbrella"?

oh my god

if not i'll be disappointed. the song reminds me of minecraft intros lmao. especially that synth part

geT OUT LMAO

the dancing is lewd af tho. so 8/10

well, so was eclipse. girl crush land

is she a necromancer? because those hips kill me and bring me back to life

i knOW. she can sing, rap and dance. triple threat. okay you cant possibly be wrong about her color and animal

uhh blue and fish. idk wot fish but a fish

y e s. its a blue betta fish. she said, and i quote "the blue betta fish is one that needs to be kept alone, because it eats the other fish in her tank. so i'm going to take over the group like that"

i- IS THE ENTIRE SECOND SUBUNIT SASSY

SDFGHGFDSSDFGH shes very oblivious and confused also idk if i should show you this but its hella funny and falls into the dumb blonde stereotype. she acts cute in a live stream and then she just

*that beautiful face plant video*

and at the enD KIM LIP IS LIKE "yes. whats next?" and looks through the comments

i-is she ok

yeah, she just stays there like ten seconds and then lifts her head while laughing. her superpower is teleportation btw. anyway, shes just very oblivious and awkward

nice man

the next member is choerry

oof, she qt. her color is purple.

yes. she doesnt like cherries btw

of course. why doesn't she like them? they're gud ;; maybe they remind her of all the bad puns she must have had to endure

i- most likely tbh. she prefers her actual name too sdfgfdsasdf. but choerry is a play on her name. cho yerim.

ah, i see

here's her song that takes a very weird turn and supports further the girl crush concept lawl

i expect lewd dancing. wot’s her animal?

a bat

e d g y. they made her eat a cherry. the monsters

i know, the madmen

o, here comes the lewd dancing. oof, that was short, but it was cool. back to... this??

it happens more than once. hmm, its a really nice song tbh

yeah, it was pretty nice

shes the bright, positive one

and managed to feed a squirrel out of her hand, so shes a princess confirmed

o damn how tall is she. she looks pretty tall in this pic

oh my god all of them are so small i literally cannot cope

;-; pure babies

hmm i think this is old information but the tallest is 165 sdfsGHJKJHJ

o damn

it says here shes 160. p u r e. her super power is plane travelling, like, shes the only one who can meet both kim lip and jinsoul. thats why i told you about the dimension thing

..alright..? this seems pretty redundant, idk. the whole superpower thing and the different planes thing is just odd. what purpose do they serve

well, its basically a whole universe, i guess it ties to the whole story

there's a story? uhh

yeah, but we won't get into that too much. here's odd eye circle's debut song

oh, this song is... something. i could live without the weird distorted voice. fucc yes more lewd dancing. well, that was trippy.

anyway, the third subunit is called yyxy, and it has "fall from eden" as their concept

o

the first member from this subunit is yves, pronounced as eve but it gotta be fancy y'know

oo, noice. please for the love of god tell me her color is white

no one's color is white

well, it’s not a color ;D

ug h. anyway, here’s her song.

hecc yes more lewd dancing

omf

the song is.. odd. GET OUTTA HERE HER COLOR IS TOTALLY WHITE. EVERYTHING HERE I WHITE. SHE WEARS ALL WHITE.

:( her apple is burgundy

what. is that- is that her color

yeah

...i quit.

fgfdghjkghjGHJ

well, that was something

her name is eve, so people speculate the song and mv are about her living a normal life after falling from eden y'know. anyway, shes the mom friend #2

o, interesting pFF

she was very awkward at the beginning, when she first was introduced

awh ;;

and her animal is a swan

AND HER COLOR ISN'T WHITE GET OUTTA HERE

fgfdsdfg shes also pretty savage now that she isnt as shy, but she takes care of the members, since shes one of the older membersGHJKJHGHJK

wholesome

shes very cute i like her uwu

the next one is an actual animu waifu. her name is chuu

i-

and she is the full of cuteness member

yeah i can teLL. the second image scraped my stone heart

yes, she softens everyone. here’s her mv, and the other girl is yves. and chuu is more or less in love with her. lesbian icon

alexa ur doing the thing, but reverse

SHES LITERALLY STALKING YVES AND GIVING HER AN APPLE AND THE SONG IS ABOUT ROMANTIC LOVE get outta here

ALL OF THESE BANDS ARE BASICALLY FAMILIES YALL SHIPPING THEM IS INCEST

ASDFGFDSDFGHJ but yves just shot a heart at her

it's a music video smh

hey, im not saying shes gay for yves in real life, just in, like, the universe theyre building

ah, i see. the choreography is gud. and the whole music video is nice. and the song is nice too. alright, what's her color

peach

do these people only know red and blue variations. THERE ARE OTHER COLORS OUT THERE

her animal is penguin, hence her posing with a penguin plushie in that photo

awh ;;

and her fruit is strawberry. she also sang a kids show ost before she became an idol :( and the other members make her act cute sometimes in front of the camera because everyone loves her. take dis

:'c

when she does the winking thing she stops and asks "why am i doing this..." and the others are just "because its cutE"

s-STONE COLD I AM S T O N E C O L D

anyway, yes, we all love chuu

we have two members left, keep your head in the game

i'm in it to win it

the second to last member is go won

speaking of winning, apparently she already did

she is a real life doll- oh my god alex

yet another qt what is new. cute dolls. cute talented dolls e v e r y w h e r e

i remember her song just because of the way she sings "baby" there

o

*check out “One&Only” yall*

ah, i see. some nice cinematography here. she has an interesting voice

shes mostly a rapper

yeah, i can picture that. that was a pretty nice song

her color is eden green :3

n o i c e

her animal is butterfly and her fruit is pineapple

but does she like it on pizza tho >> that is the question

she's kinda cold, but shes pretty oblivious, the staff messed with her saying that "adam" is her stage name (adam translates to "small" in korean) and she actually believed them and she didnt get the joke either affdsdfg

;-; god bless

shes pretty savage tho, we have three so far

oof

she is olivia hye

and she does not appreciate olive jokes

she's pretty 0^0

she is~

wot's her personality

shes very blunt and she seems like someone that might succeed at being a famous blogger

o damn

she always speaks her mind. i haven’t really seen her play around, but that doesn’t mean i don’t find her funny sdfgfsdfg

pff the mom friend

hmm, she doesnt really take care of the others, shes the second youngest

o rlly

but she does boast about how shes the only one without a fear of heights jasdfjks

pfff alright, hmu with her song

her song is my favourite

*”Egoist” ftw*

s m o o t h. yeah, this is a nice song

ikr !!

aaand more lewd dancing the world is kind to me today

they never give it up

wot's her color and animal

her color is gray, her animal is wolf and her fruit is plum

o damn

here’s their song~

this is hype af. this song is nice too but it has odd parts

i feel like the quality of their music increased with time. the first songs are also nice but you can tell these ones are better put together

well, it makes sense

it has been two years yes asdfdsdfg

o o f

here's a predebut song. the first ever with all of them, but not their debut the intro and the chorus are the best parts ngl

that's a lot of idols fam

eh, 12 isnt that rare. BRRRRRRRRRAH

where the esketit at. that was a pretty good predebut song, all things considered. they fit a bit of everything in there

yep, here’s their debut song

this one's trippy. ah, that's why it's called "hi high" they're saying hi to me, and i'm high after watching it. UOUOUOUAAAHH

I ONLY LISTEN TO MUSIC WITH MEANINGFUL LYRICS

HLBJLNKBJLNKBKLN

do you remember any of them as your favourite or did everything already vanish

i like chuu and the last one but i think the first is still my fave

oo alright, i see. any last thoughts?

well-managed for a 12 idol group, nice choreographies (& lots of lewd dancing >>), plenty of good songs, gud stuff overall, 10/10. 11/10 for the UOUOUOUOOAAAHHH

noicE

alexa here!! oof, this took so long to put together;; also if haseul sees this please marry me goddess ily

i hope you enjoy this post, even though its a little messy!! pop a little message in our ask box too, it’ll make our day~ i hope everyone has a nice day or evening!!

[skymoonandstardust]

Peter Parker Falling in Love With You. . .

So you both go to Midtown– and you’re the same age (in this story anyway)

You’ve seen each other around school and across the room cause you have most of the same classes, but you don’t really KNOW each other and you’re not friends. it’s just “Oh yeah, it’s that F/N girl from calculus” and “Right, that’s that Parker kid who’s in my lit class.” BUT THAT’S IT, NOTHING ELSE.

 Until the day Peter realizes he needs tutoring.

Peter Parker is a genius– but he’s better when it comes to science and math then literature, or history And with him spending so much time on this “stark internship” ;)) the boy’s got almost NO time to study for that stuff and it shows.

He needs help and that’s where you come in.

You’re the opposite when it comes to school subjects. You can ace history no problem and love literature to pieces–  but you suck at science and math makes you want to  tear all your hair out, go on a hulk rampage and have a good cry after.

math is your hell… and your grades for it are not just in the toilet, their floating somewhere in the sewer by now.

So, Peter remembers your literature inclined genius and the next day when class is over he walks up to  you (after a pep talk from Ned)

and the Angel boy is just the cutest looking thing ever

“H-hi I’m Parker Peter– I mean Peter Parker! and I was wondering, since you’re great at Literature if we could maybe set up a time and you could tutor me?" 

You have  to keep from smiling at this adorable, cute shy boy!!

In the end the two of you set up to meet after school the next day– and come to an agreement.  You help Peter with lit and history and he helps you with science and math.  

He goes home (after doing some superheroing of course) and tells May about you, your upcoming tutoring session and the rest of his day over dinner.

May 10000% teases him a bit about it and asks questions (the embarrassing kind obviously) AND HE TURNS INTO A BLUSHING SHY AWKWARD MESS BUT STAYS ALL DEFENSIVE AND INSISITING LIKE  "No May, it’s not like that– It’s just a tutoring session. I don’t even know her that well.” “Ok, Peter suuuuuuure.” ;)) followed by a little more teasing and a few more questions before she drops it.

He breathes a sigh if relief.

The Dork obviously starts cleaning his room that night to prep for your tutoring session.

Everything he said to May is true,  but you’re still a girl who’s coming over and the two of you will probably study in his room– and it’s a mess right now and he doesn’t want you to see it like that. That  would be humiliating and embarrassing– plus Aunt May’s been asking him to clean if for a week now so… 

Peter doesn’t finish it all that night but he gets most of it done and rushes to finish the rest of the job the next morning before he’s got to catch the train to school.

He does. Just in time.

The room’s still too nerdy and dorky for his liking and Peter kinda cringes at himself and what you might think or say– At least he got those plastic lightsabres out of sight and took down those lord of the rings posters… but his star wars posters are still on the wall right next to the USS enterprise model on his book case with a couple of star trek figures scattered around it and that leggo deathstar is sitting right there on top of his desk where you can’t miss it.

 but there's no time and he can’t do anything about that now so he grabs his backpack, says bye to May and runs out the door.

  The poor angel boy is a bursting with nerves the entire day and can’t stop thinking about the tutoring session…cause he doesn’t want to scare you off. Peter doesn’t get many opportunities to make new friends and he doesn’t  want this one to be a disaster.

Tries to avoid looking at you the  whole day.

When the  bell rings he’s kind of internally screaming.  

You walk up to him and Peter’s already sweating and a nervous shy wreck…

It takes you asking him two times before he finally answers your question about how the two of you are getting to his place. Peter finally stutters out that you’ve got to take the train and you walk with him to the station.

the walk is AWKWARD– AND THE TRAIN RIDE IS WORSE. I mean, you try to bring up something to talk about and  the conversation lasts for two minutes at the most before awkward silence,  Peter's ever present friend his back.

By the time you get on the train the two of you have kind of stopped trying and just sit there in silence while he listens to music and you look out the window.

The stop finally comes and Peter gets off with you a step behind.

On the few block walk you try talking again, asking him about school and that conversation ends up going better. He starts relaxing, answers without stuttering and even asks you a few questions that keeps the discussion going till you’re walking up to his apartment door.

You come in and May walks up from the living room.

You’re expecting her to greet peter first or say something to him… what you don’t expect is for her to smile and say “You must be Y/N– it’s nice to meet you, I’m May, Peter’s aunt”

You’re slightly startled but you manage to respond and end up saying something like “That’s me, It's nice to meet you too." 

"Thank you. We’ll I’ll let you to get to your tutoring session– and i’ll bring in some snacks for you just in case.”

before you can even answer Peter's ushering you along and saying “Thanks aunt May, we’ll see you later.” and before you can blink you’re in his room.

Ok– a little bit of teasing may have taken place… or a lot— before you cut if off and told him that you liked all that nerdy/dorky stuff too and said that his room was actually cool.

Peter died a bit at that.

After that the two of your start talking about all things star wars, star treck and geeky/nerdy.

Before you know it almost an hours gone by and no studying whatsoever has been done… Not that either of you are complaining. especially not peter–he’s over the moon CAUSE YOU ACTUALLY LIEK THE SAME THINGS AS HIM AND DON"T THINK HIS ROOM HIS WIERD– AND YOU’RE SO NICE AND FUNNY AND LAUGH AT HIS STUPID JOKES. you’re real friend material and he’s already planning on when/how to introduce you to Ned.

 As much as you both want to keep talking  you’ve gotta get to tutoring so you crack open the books and at least try to concentrate and get some work done (but you both throw in as many nerdy, jokes puns and references as possible— and it ends up making it more fun.)

 After working on literature for an hour then switching over to math and working for another hour…you’re tired, it’s getting late and you need to go so you thank them both, tell Peter you’ll see him tomorrow and leave to head home.

Peter is all kinds of happy and doesn’t waste a minute before calling and letting Ned know how well it went. As soon as peter gave him all the details ned gave his full approval and a stamp of permission to let you join the group (which is  really just the two of them) 

That night Peter goes to sleep looking forward to tomorrow, and planning on asking you to sit with him and Ned at lunch.

--he does, without stammering once and when you say yes his heart kind of goes !! and Peter wants to become the ecstatic, happy puppy that he is but plays it cool cause he doesn't want to embarrass you or freak you out.

You walk with them to the cafeteria

Go through the line together and sits down at their usual table 

Michelle's already sitting there and you get no reaction from her. she just looks up at you over her book goes "I'm Michelle" then goes back to reading.

She says and does nothing else for the rest of lunch, and completely ignores all of you.

Meanwhile-- Ned brought up the topic of star wars and so you're all a seat or two away talking excitedly like you're old friends-- even though you're not.

Ned brings up movie night smoothly (cause Peter is hardly ever smooth) "Hey, speaking of star wars-- Peter and I were gonna have a star wars movie night tomorrow after school and if you wanted to, you could come"

You say yes obviously.

Flash forward to the next night with Ned and Peter setting up the movie night and peter panicking a bit (Ned calms  him down)

You show up and all three of you sit on the couch with blankets, eat the pizza may ordered, snack on popcorn and talk, laugh and joke. (there may or may not have been a debate about which movie was the best that almost ended in a lightsabre duel between you and Peter)

You all had so much fun that you coming over for movie night becomes a regular thing.

You and peter tutoring each other becomes a regular thing too.

Every day after class you go over to the parker apartment and you help him with whatever in lit or history is stumping him and Peter helps you try to understand science concepts and math formulas (when it's not movie night that is)

Half the time you guys just end up talking or forgetting about tutoring and goof off (watching movies, showing each other music, meme's or YouTube videos-- he's shown you a lot of them about Spider-Man, that new superhero ;)) )  

Sometimes- most of the time actually Peter's late

You have no idea why

But he is, so you end up hanging out with May and the two of you  become friends.  Really-- she adores you like a daughter.

And when Peter comes home from being Spider-Man to find you and May talking and laughing together at the kitchen table or the couch  his heart goes :) every time

Cause his aunt and his best friend are friends and that's awesome

But then one day Peter come home and like usual you and May are at the table and  you're smiling and just as he walks up you burst out laughing and his heart goes !!!!!!!!

He kind of panics, cause his heart shouldn't be going like that around one of his two his best friends and it's not like he hasn't heard you laugh before (it's the most beautiful sound in case you were wondering) and why is he reacting like this now??

Peter just sneaks back  into his room to think it over long an hard-- which he does, for three hours and finally he has to face facts: sometime during all the tutoring sessions, the movie nights and hanging out together he fell for you hard.   

Thinking back he sees it was happening for a long time in little signs and ways. . .but he didn't even notice till now cause he just refused to and pushed it down so much.

But he's in love---- the angel boy is a goner and he's in deep.

Now he just needs to work up the nerve the tell you. . .

The forevers: @a-sea-of-fandoms  @casownsmyass @imaginethatsupernatural @scarlettsoldier @thatbasicnerd4life @docharleythegeekqueen

Marvel girls: @a-girl-who-loves-disney @l4life  @kenziecole-green @padfootsiriusorionblackthethird

Spiderman: @lets-imagine-fanfics @cutie1365 @l4life @tomxhotland​ @petah-parkah-and-potahtas

[artgirllullaby]

Issues

Hi guys :D

Ok, so the next one is already done and this oen was missing just a few stuff that took a while. I still feel like it’s unecessarely long, but I decided to post liek this anwyays. And also forgive for some typos and mistakes, I’m not using my computer to post this... I tried to clean the most I could but there always one of two words escaping.

Anyways, this was @jantomweek Day 3 prompt: First Kiss

I had a completely different story in my mind first but... this one got a lot better even if the ending feels a bit rushed lol

I hope you enjoy! :)

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5 | Day 6 | Day 7 

Janna looked at the pink rose frowning. She could feel Star going on hype somewhere behind her looking at the rose directed to her with a shine in her eyes, Jackie was probably around also thinking it was rather cute. Starfan was probably sharing the happiness of Star of watching their ship come true…

As if.

She drew a very controlled breath, “What are you doing?”

“Didn’t you hear?” he said a bit annoyed, “I want to date you.”

Janna sighed her hand massaging the side of her forehead gently, “Tom, cut it off, this isn’t funny.”

“I’m not joking!” he said annoyed.

“Tom we hate each other.” Janna stated, “We can’t stand or agree in anything. In fact I punched you this morning just because I saw your face, remember?”

He did, but thankfully he could recover fast from injuries. “I know, but… I know it’s crazy and sounds insane, but… I don’t know I just want this, ok?! I don’t know why, I don’t have an explanation to give, I just really want to try this!”

Janna crossed her arms unbelieving, “What’s the plan? You’re planning something, some joke on me, aren’t you?”

“I am not!”

“Then explain this to me!” she points to the pink rose, “Because we had been fighting and battling each other non stop for three years and now you just come and say you want to date? Are you sure you didn’t trip and hit your head on the road? And what’s up to the pink rose? Shouldn’t be red?”

“I don’t have an explanation!” Tom exasperated, “All I know is that all that ‘imagine your future’ thing made me wonder and I realize that a future in which you aren’t there it’s plain, boring and I just don’t want that, so I’m trying my best shot here in calling you to go out with me…” Tom then looked at the rose extending for her again blushing slightly and whispering, “And the rose… Well, your favorite is pink so I thought you would like it. I stole from Marco’s garden, don’t tell him.”

“Pink is not my favorite color.”

“Whatever you say” Tom shrugged “So? I’ll meet you at the fair?”

The dark haired girl looked at the rose, then at him and sighed. Part of her was curious about the outcomes of this even if deep inside she felt like she was doing something wrong. He was Star’s ex, even if they were friends now and he even hang out with Marco, it would be weird- it should be weird.

And still Janna reached out for her pink rose and agreed.

“Eh, fine” She shrugged, “But you’re paying and if I find out this is a joke I’ll put a curse on you worse than Nasaya.”

The demon nodded unamused, “Eh I can deal with that it’s only fair.”

“One more thing,” she said as he was about to walk away, “my favorite color is not pink.” Tom smiled teasingly and went on his way, replying without looking back.

“Whatever you say.”

.

.

.

Janna had to admit she was impressed.

Tom was very cool once he got over being annoying all the time, he had some temper problems to solve, but he had confessed to Janna he was taking some potions to help with that (something about two demons of different kinds not mixing the genetics well or something?) so in that night things were fine.

In fact, things were going really well.

When they were both able to set down their anger on each other, it was rather… joyful. They got to talk and find common interests, they liked Love Sentence, he liked Karate movies, but rather zombie ones. She was a fan of old poetry, he… well, he knew the old poet she liked but it was close enough. As they went on talking things began to move smoothly between them, besides Janna had to admit that being on a multiverse fair was fun and interesting.

Janna was eating a piece of cotton candy (or something that looked a lot like it) and sharing with Tom when she suddenly realized they were holding hands. Not just holding hands, they were standing right next to each other in a way she was using his arm as support without realizing. Just… Very couple like.

She didn’t know if she liked or not.

Tom was still talking about the dimension section they were in, talking how was to go there the first time in royal duties and how his mother couldn’t go because it was dangerous on them (well, if she was a cotton living next to a flame demon who cries lava, she would be worried too), so he got a giant cotton candy for his mother as souvenir and all… The filipino realized she didn’t mind enjoying time with him at all, he was indeed trying to be a nice guy for her and she was doing just fine too. She didn’t mind.

Janna found herself tempted to intertwine their fingers.

Maybe she was freaking out too much. There were a lot of people, he probably just hold her hand so she wouldn’t get lost, and there wasn’t much space to walk so that’s why he didn’t say about her standing close, and he… He was the one who invited her on a date. He said he couldn’t imagine a more boring future than to be without her so, that meant something right? Wait, why she cared in first place? She shouldn’t care at all…

Well, she cared. She cared a lot. She wanted this. She wanted him to have meant every word and every part and everything… Since when she had been like that?

Janna frowned at herself. She had been crushing on this guy all along and didn’t know? What the… Well, it explained a lot actually. On why she reacted to violent around him and felt like pranking and teasing him around… It was her way to show affection most of times, she just didn’t know how to be “sweet” and “delicate”. She always know she was the kind of love who would bite… She just didn’t expect the bite back.

Or that it would be Tom of all people.

She was almost convinced herself, the idea of them being together as a couple getting wrapped around her head while she was moving her hands slowly to intertwine their fingers. She felt as if she did something simple as that it would mean everything would change. Like by intertwining their fingers meant to commitment to this - whatever it would be called - it meant a step to never go back… She was overthinking? Maybe. Possibly… Mostly like it. Yep. She was overthinking but who could blame her? Why it had to be him of all people?

Her fingers had already opened from his hands as she tried to move to intertwine with his when he suddenly stopped and so did she. She looked up to him wondering if he realized and would put an end on it, it he planned something or… Why he was staring at somewhere else?

Janna tried to follow his gaze through the crowd trying to find what was that caught his attention so much he forgot he was around her. On the other side of stalls corridors, there was a sweet desserts stand (a very much likely the one they got the cotton candy thing) and in front that the only thing that could have been on his attention was a blond hair… Right beside a red hoodie and dark hair.

She felt the pain in her chest. He was watching those two, now that she think about they had been on the same quarter for a while. The moment the couple turned to each other to talk it was impossible to not recognize their faces or the hearts in her cheek, or miss how Tom flinched in the moment when Marco leaned and kissed her mark making Star giggle.

That was the moment Janna came to realize. They had been hating each other for months why would that suddenly change? It didn’t. Tom didn’t invite her to the fair, he invited the first girl who accepted and had some experience with multidimensional stuff and wouldn’t be overwhelmed. If she had refused he probably would had invited someone else. But he made it all be so fun and romantic and… She was stupid enough to believe in all that.

Janna pulled Tom away and throwing the cotton candy on the floor angrily before stepping on it repeatedly. The action causing a yelp from Tom and some surprised gasps from people around.

“Hey! What was that for?!” Janna ignored him, so he tried to hold her and stop her from keep smashing the candy, “Hey! Janna!” But instead of listening she pushed him again and stormed out the scene, he called after her running right after. It was troubling since Janna was smaller and was getting through the creatures faster than him. It didn’t take much to lose track of her.

.

Tom went around the fair, he asked the stalls they had been if they had seen her, he asked a few people around, but no one knew where she could be. He was beginning to get worried at this point, those fairs were open to anyone participate, which meant that even monsters who despised humans (or those who eat them) would be around.

“Hey, is everything ok?”

Tom turned around to Star and Marco standing behind him. Star was holding Marco’s hand intertwining their fingers as the other held his arm closer to her, they both looked worried at Tom.

“Oh hey guys… It’s just Janna, she run away and I can’t find her anywhere. I’m starting to get worried, have you seen her?”

Marco looked at Star and she shrugged, “I haven’t seen her around from the moment we got here.”

“Me neither, sorry man.” Marco replied shrugging too.

He sighed tiredly, messing his hair “That’s ok, I’ll try to find her.”

“Did something happen for her to run?” Star asked, “You didn’t get mad, did you?”

“What?! No! I told you guys I’m taking care of that!”

“What was it then?”

“I have no idea, I saw you guys in the other stall and thought on getting to say hi and maybe hangout all together and then- oh…”

Star looked at him quizzically, but Marco seemed to understand the same as him “Well, better find her to explain yourself then.”

“Yeah, see you guys around!”

Tom ran around the stalls for a while until he decided it was no use, he took a breath and then closed two of his eyes leaving just the third one open. There were a lot of creatures around, but only one was a witch descendant. Tom was able to identify the trace of her essence on the stalls corridors and followed them until he was out the fair, the traces led to a hill and going on a tree to one branch where… Where she was sitting on currently.

The demon wouldn’t admit out loud, but it was always mesmerizing to look at Janna with the magic sensible eye, sometimes he did without her noticing. It was an flow of energy and magic unique and beautiful, it was in constant change and movement since it was a magic that still getting used to her body after she got her witch powers. It was one of the reasons he was drawn to her.

He opened his eyes and blinked twice to adjust to his normal vision. Janna was looking right at him with unamused face from the tree, her face with clear determination to not move from there.

“So you can see with the third eye.”

He shrugged, “It isn’t a big deal.”

“I guess.”

She stayed silent and he sighed, “Can you come down?”

“For what?

“I want to talk.”

“We have nothing to talk about.” She drifted her eyes watching the fair from afar again.

Tom took a breath trying to be patient “We just were talking for the most part of the night!”

“That was before I realized you were joking with me.” She replied indifferent.

“I am not joking! Can you just get down?!”

Janna rolled her eyes, but she jumped down the grass and crossed her arms in front of him “Done. So?”

“Look, whatever conclusion you got, it’s wrong.”

Janna gave an exaggerated smile to show her annoyance, “Oh, good to know! So this was indeed all a joke, right?”

“Of course not! Do you think I would spent so much energy and time on you and tonight for a joke?!”

The brunette gave a mocked laugh, “Oh, I’m sorry I’m not worth all that!”

The demon face-palmed at her answer, “That’s not what I meant! Stop twisting my words!”

“I’m not twisting nothing!” She raised her voice, “The only options for you to have called me on a date is either a joke on me or-” Janna nibbled her lower lip and shook her head- “I’m just going with the less-hurting option.”

Tom raised his eyebrows and now he was the one raising his voice, “Stop assuming stuff and hear me out-”

“For what?!” She replied in a loud tone “So you can just hang me around waiting for your first chance with Star-”

“No one is talking about Star!” He screamed frustrated.

“Oh really?!” She yelled back, “Then why you’re getting so angry and messed up by mentioning her name?!”

“I’m angry that you take me so lowy! I’m not that kind of guy!”

“Really cause your angry issues already showed up otherwise back then!”

Tom passed his hand on his hair trying to keep his control “I can’t erase my past, ok?! Yeah I did wrong and as result of those stuff I lost Star, but this had nothing to do with us!”

“There you go! You are trying to win her back by using me to show you got no more issues!”

“I never said that! She’s gone, she moved on and so did I! Why the hell you think you’re here for?!”

“Because you’re trying to fix things with the first one to raise their hand to you! It could have been anyone!”

“But it’s not anyone, it’s you in here!” Tom massaged his temples, “Freaking God, I didn’t think you were so jealous-”

There was an offended gasp from her, “Me?! Jealous?! Are you for real?!”

“Oh I’m sorry,” Tom replied inserting sarcasm into his words, “I saw my friend and her boyfriend across a festival and thought of saying hi and it was enough to make you go nuts!”

“Oh says the one who tried to fry the same guy who’s with her only because of a dance once!”

“Once! And that’s past, I wasn’t over her yet-”

“You also cursed him!”

“I was young and immature! I’m over that, freaking hell!”

“Oh you’re screaming at me doesn’t look like!”

“You started it!”

“Real mature reply!”

“Janna, just shut up so I-”

“So what?!” She screamed even louder than before.

“I’ll make you!” Tom pulled some strands of his own hair in annoyance.

“Oh, make me!”

“I am serious!” his eyes already shining in the dark, but Janna didn’t back down.

“So am I! But we both know you-”

Janna stopped talking because before she even finished her sentence, Tom’s mouth was over hers stopping any possible syllable to leave her lips. She had three seconds of shock in which she didn’t quite reacted, another five in which she just closed her eyes and started kissing back, and only then she got into herself and stepped back.

“Wait- What the hell you think you’re doing!?”

“Shutting you up.”

He didn’t wait her reply as he held her face firmly and leaned on her again, his lips going just as angry and wild as before. Janna tried to push him away again but she was unable to (ok, she would be honest, she didn’t really wanted to, he wasn’t forcing her into it - She could have got free from him if she really wanted so.) So instead she focused her energy and the heat from the fight to kiss him back.

Neither of them really knew how exactly happened, someone had moved (neither knew who was the first to do so or if they both did at the same time), she tripped, but he held her close stopping her from falling or getting her lips apart from him for longer than a moment, her body was just attached to his like they were magnets, then after the tree was giving support to her back and she used his leg to get more support (Thanks Lord, her legs were starting to feel like jelly) and her hands were in his hair while his rested on her hip and the other was closed in a fist as his arm was giving support to his own body. It was a weird - and yet - comfortable position for them.

Tom only stepped away when air was missing in his lungs and he could feel he was missing her breath too.

“I bring you here…” He said catching up his breath, “Because I really… Wanted to start something new… It was never-”

“Tom.” Janna interrupted him in a serious tone.

The demon looked at her a bit nervous, but didn’t let it show by any means, “Yeah?”

“Shut up.”

And just like that she yanked his collar, kissing him just as passionate as before.

[clubpenguinheadcanons]

Decided to play Club Penguin: Elite Penguin Force

Okay, so this was a while ago that i played through it, but i wrote this down and never submitted it. Since, idk, didn’t think to. And, well...ah, felt like sharing it. Not really headcanons, just me reacting with this silly stuff that goes on. 

So apparently Jet and Rookie are already EPF agents when you are in the game.

For some reason, the character you play isn’t a PSA agent? Or are they??? They make it seem that you don’t know about the PSA and the likes, but at the same time, you know that Rookie is a PSA agent?? So umm, did Rookie’s info get leaked or something?

Herbert isn’t in the cave when you go down to save Rookie (the door isn’t there). The game was released in November 2008, which was long after Mission 6: Questions for a Crab (January 2008). So I guess Herbert really did dip the moment you found his Secret Hideout.   

Also holy fuck, the EPF was released around the same time Herbert was discovered. 

Well, Rookie sucks at survival as well. 

As well that Rookie and Jet were a part of the EPF for that long, I wonder what made them go to that status so quick? 

With mission 4 with finding G, I think Agent would be concerned, cause a friend is missing .3. Surprised they weren’t like in this “WHOO’S GARRY?!”

Never mind, you need to ask who Gary is before you can even proceed with finding him. 

I am now headcanoning that this is some android, okay I kid. But still.  

“Maybe he took a day off?” Hehe, yeah, and he would just up and leave the Director hanging. Good call Agent!

Found G dead in the Mines.

Okay, he ain’t dead, justs with a bump on the head and in pain while trapped under a mine cart.

Gotta use the convenient hot geyser to fill the convenient resilient balloons to free him.

“Hey, the mine cart is heading up to the stalagmites! “Don’t you mean stalactites?”  You nerds, trying to remember the right words instead of making sure the cart doesn’t land on either of you. 

I swear, I was half worried it would fall on Gary, or on the player character. 

That would be hilarious though, "You saved me!” *cart falls on him* “...” (ok not really, but my humor is fucked up). 

Or like so close to them that they just fall into the pit. 

WHO’S DAT IN THE SHADOWS?!

Found G, his memory is fuzzy, but hey he’s alive!

Okay skipping past finishing the Puffle Training. 

Also, PH is adorable, sleeping in a bubble that her puffles captured her in. 

I am glad that they redesigned her. 

Helping G with the Snow Trekker! 

Rookie questioning the Cafe Shop Owner. Cute!

“Man G, you’re gonna test run this?” “PFFTT ME?! Nah, you will Agent!” 

Okay, not exact words, but like I’m just thinking of Agent just being like “...fuck...I knew this would happen...” 

Agent gets wrapped into test driving things they don’t want to test drive. 

“ME?!” “You seem excited Agent” G mistakes their fear voice for excitement, or is sarcastic. 

Test drove it, seems that this Agent just loves the Snow Trekker. 

No really, this Agent cannot BELIEVE that THE Snow Trekker is REAL

Got the Robot Locator

G REMEMBERS EVERYTHING NOW GUYS HE REMEMBERS EVERYTHING

So apparently he made robots to test drive his more dangerous prototypes. 

I’m putting this down as Agent told G to be more careful with who he lets to test drive.

Then they became sentient 

JESUS THE ROBO-LOCATOR IS HUGE

ITS SUPPOSE TO BE ON YOUR BACK

HOW THE HELL DID AGENT PICK IT UP LIKE A POCKET THING

G confirmed for shit cart surfing skills

GOTTA FIND ALL THE CLUES

Help Rookie with welding the ticket booth together

Wait, doesn’t he have the Elite Puffles as well?

Help Jet with fishing

Damnit, Jet you lazy, not wanting to fish. 

Okay, all of these agents are lazy and Agent here is on intern status to do all the things they don’t want to do. Clearance, smearance. 

“Robot art school” Don’t be mean Jet. That’s how a world war starts. Oh wait, the robot would have to be rejected from...okay moving on.

Damn it G you and your sentient robots. 

Got the thing to deactivate them! 

*Goes into Gift Shop* *Robot is trying to steal vault door* “Threat level, low, continue to steal vault door* “YOU SON OF A-”

Welp, got the wheelie bot out of the way. As well that it was being stripped of it’s parts.

Got the other two bots now!

Yet they were sending an activation signal? HMMMM

Aww, a play, for me?

Lol Art is done by the yellow puffle.

Wait. Something happened! Time to “Save the Day Once Again!”

THE DIRECTOR CALLED

ISLAND WIDE EMERGENCY

TIEM TO GO TO CPI

Wait..that’s 9 years too earlier. 

Also G isn’t here...so like???

No monitors online and the puffles are gone!

Yup, G got taken. 

TO HQQQQ

OMG PH IS SO UPSET 

WE’LL GET THE PUFFLES DARLING

ALSO HOLY FUCK BIG HOLE IN THE LAB

“I’ll take the Snow Trekker!”

Okay yeah this Agent loves the snow trekker

“Never remember this hole bieng so robot shaped before” NO SHIT AGENT

“Wait a minute! This must be a hideout...” I feel like Agent would know that from like...being trapped in Herbert’s befoer. 

“for a *GASP* GIANT ROBOT” HOLY FUCKING SHIT I HC THIS AGENT HAS SPONGEBOB’S VOICE FUCK

GARY IS IN THE HEAD 

I guess he is teh “brains” of this operation

Okay sorry not sorry 

The robots built this giant robot based on Gary’s sketches. Damn...they good. 

“Hey you, whatever you are! Put G down!” PSSHHHHHH

“Don’t worry G, I’ll save you!” Okay, like now I just head canon Agent says that any time shit does down and G is gone. 

WHAT THE FUCK HOW DID IT GET INTO TOWN

DA FAQ AGENT 

“It’s a relief to see you, Agent! The Ultimate Proto-Bot is ruining everything!” I feel like the first part was sarcastic. 

So the robot can sneeze

JESUS FUCK G ARE YOU OKAY THE ROBOT LITERALLY FELL OVER

Okay it didn’t fall over, just lost balance

AYY BLAST GOT FREE

TO THE DOCKS

KNOCKED IT

ON NO IT WENT INTO THE WATER

OMG IT IS SPIN DRYING 

Rookie is using the rubber ducky. Bless your heart

Omg poor puffle got sick xD 

Got Flit, and now that robo is flying

HEY LET’S HIT THE ROBOT WITH AN ANVIL

Knocked it down

Bouncer is free!

Time to jet pack fly to them!

HIT IT’S BOILER

NOW IT CAN’T FLYY

Thank god it landed into the snow

IMagine it missing teh mountain

liek jesus...good bye G.

WOO Got Chirp!

Chirp broke that glass like a pro!

Pop is free and G’s glass prison is broken!

Fuck no more jetpack. 

G was able to freed by making a bubble. 

Well that’s a sad robot

Deactivated finally!

Woohoo! I won! 

Welp, that’s the main story!

[kote-the-inn-keeper]

Kote seeing dedan and hespa at the waystone but they pretend not to know each other. But they have like 6 kids.

//i WOULD CRY HOLY FUCK YES!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOLD ON LETS JUST//

There was a loud bustling outside, making Kote and Bast pause their conversation for a small moment. The two looked puzzled; it wasn’t time for the noon rush yet. Everyone was still out and about in the fields, or working on the farms. Were they taking an early day perhaps?

Kote pushed himself up from the table and went to see what was going on, before the inn door flew open, children screeching and running in like banshees from hell. Two parents walked in after the little gremlins, who were currently tracking dirt and grass all over the inn.

Bast was gone. He literally left as fast as humanly possible without drawing attention to himself.

Kote turned to ask for help, but saw he was gone, and sighed. Listening to the adults bicker, he walked to go greet them in the least, dodging children along the wall. “Hello! Welcome to the Waystone Inn. Passing through, I assume?”

The woman looked to him, pausing, and just watching him.

Kote jumped from the intensity of her stare, smiling sheepishly and looking to the burly man. “A-Are these your children?”

“Yeah.” He said, rather bluntly. Not really... offering much else in return.

“O-Oh, uh... they are... lovely. Um, can I help you two?” Kote asked, growing more anxious with his Inn being trashed by children and two rather large people just staring at him.

“You look familiar.” The woman said, crossing her arms softly, stepping in and around the innkeeper. “Must be the red hair.”

Watching her saunter off to grab a kid, it didn’t take him long to click onto who she was. It was hard to have a walk like her’s and not be a seasoned fighter. Hespa... God, he meet her as a kid! He was only a teen around that time; she was still alive? Not to say she wasn’t smart; but she was brutish in manners and, well, the job she had was shit. Low living rates.

“Didn’t we know a red head?” The man asked, closing the door and moving past Kote. “Ale for me. Food for the kids.” He said, looking down to Kote as he walked passed.

“Sure. A ton.” Hespa replied, trying to corral some of the six screeching kids into one area and table. “At least three.”

The man grunted a bit, trying to help her in moving the kids around and getting them to stop being terrors to the place.

Kote quickly slipped back into the kitchen, grasping his chest and leaning against the wall, silently screaming. How the /hell/ did she get all the way out to where he was?! Why was she even there!? Kids?! What if she recognized him?! What would he do!!?

“Reshi?” Bast whispered, peeking in from the door that lead out back. “Are they gone?”

Kote turned swiftly, color drained from his face and heart racing. “Hm? No. No.” he shoo his head swiftly, hair jostling into a bit of a mess. “No, there are a lot of them and -- oh man. Get in here and help me cook!” He marched over, managing to grab the fae before he slipped away.

“But Reshi!!”

“You’re supposed to be helping me, Bast. I can’t go out there.” 

“What do you mean you can’t? You own the place.”

“I can’t go out there again. Not right now.”

Bast tilted his head, “Scared?”

“SURE.” Kote said shortly, already cutting up meat and rushing around the kitchen. “Whatever will get you to help me out for five minutes and not let me die.”

Bast put his hands on his hips, “Well aren’t you being the over dramatic on here today.”

“BAST.”

“Reeeeeshiiiii~?”

Kote paused and glared at him, “Help me. Please. I can’t go out there because I know one of them. Maybe both. But I can’t go out there right now.”

Bast looked puzzled, then pressed his lips into a fine line. “So disappearing from already greeting them is going to solve it?”

“...Damn it.”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought. I mean, I’ll help you out, but, you can’t hide out back here. Just, maybe, don’t talk to them. That should work.” Bast explained, starting to help his friend out with the cooking.

Kote sighed, “Maybe. Go get them drinks, please? I’ll get this done... gotta start for the rush anyway.”

Bast nodded and went off to get Hespe and her husband and kids drinks, coming back maybe ten minutes later, looking frazzled. “...Reshi...”

“Yes, Bast?”

“I hate kids.”

“I know, Bast.” He continued to cook and make sandwiches and stew, pulling out one of his pies and getting it read as well. he dished everything out onto plates as fast as possible, taking a few, and giving Bast the others to carry out. “Sorry for the wait... We weren’t expecting people just yet.” He said as he set plates down in front of people.

“That’s fine--” Hespa began.

“Took long enough.” 

“Dedan!” Hespa hissed, reaching over a kid and punching him in the arm. “Behave!”

‘Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.’ Kote thought, keeping a smile on his face and dying on the inside. “I hope you enjoy. If you need anything, ask me or my helping hand.”

“And your name is?” Dedan asked, chewing his food already.

“Kote.” Kote replied without hesitation. hesitation made people seem odd. It gave people away.

Hespa said something softly to herself, but it was drowned int he sound of clacking silverware against plates and children shouting and laughing. She ate though, giving Kote a long hard stare still, glancing to Dedan on occasion.

Kote fidgeted softly, before nodding and smiling again. With that, he turned away and hid back in the kitchen with Bast.

“I think she knows...” Bast muttered.

“You think!” Kote hissed, putting his hands to his head. “Oh no, no, no. This is bad. Bast you don’t understand how bad this is.”

“I think I know.”

“Do you? Really? You seem pretty calm for knowing how bad this is.” Kote snipped.

Bast held up his hands, “Look, freaking out isn’t going to help. If we keep calm, they won’t push. I-- huh?” He paused and peeked out form the kitchen, listening in on a conversation.

Kote paused, but slowly peeked out as well, trying to hear what was going on.

The kids were laughing and talking, some of them making a strange noise and making a weird hand gesture to one another. Kote couldn’t hear, but he felt liek he knew what was up.

“Why are they saying... chek?” Bast whispered.

Kote groaned and hid his face in his hands, sliding back into the kitchen slowly. “That’s really Dedan and Hespa... Long story short, an Adem Mercenary beat Dedan’s ass, made fun of him by calling him a dog, and did that to him. guess Hespa never let that one go and their kids picked it up.”

Bast was quiet, before nodding slowly. “R....ight...” He replied, unsure. “well, they should be done soon. So, we won’t have to worry much longer.

Much longer was two hours, and a lunch rush from locals later. This forced Kote to go out and stand about, interact, and clean up due to the swell of people in the usually quiet inn. This forced him to be around Hespa and Dedan; one of which kept watching him as he interacted with regulars. Eventually, they were they last ones once more and getting ready to leave.

“Thanks for the meal! Already, outside again!” Dedan roared playfully over the kids, chasing all of them out the door like chickens.

Hespa hung behind, paying for everything. “Sorry about that... Trying to go see family and what not. Lots of kids to feed and feet to keep busy.”

Kote nodded, taking the money from her softly. “May your travels be safe.”

“Mhm...” She replied, not leaving right away.

“D...Do you need something else, ma’am?” Kote asked, blinking quickly. “Food for the travel? Water?”

“No, no.” She said, before giving a knowing smile. “I’m sure you don’t need anymore trouble from us. This should really be the last time you deal with the two of us.” With that, she turned and left the inn, closing the door behind her.

Bast paused his sweeping. “I told you she knew...”

“I know, Bast!”

[byjove-cannibalcove]

@tirlaeyn

I liked her fine more or less up until the moment she and will kissed

NOT because of Shippy reasons, but because i was very much on Will’s side of the narrative at that point, wanted him to be happy, and didnt like the way she treated him then.

More or less ‘i cant kiss you because your crazy’ which is just... a rude way to put it, you know? You could say ‘im at a bad point’ or ‘im busy right now’ or ‘im just not looking for anything permanent right now and I wouldnt want to treat you flippantly’, liek there are a LOT of things you can say for the emotional guy you care about other than essentially telling him hes too crazy to love.

And even if she had, if shed LEFT it at that, then fine, but then she keeps coming to visit him like ‘im going to string you along for a bit until i decide whether or not i want you’ which is... also shitty

She believed Will killed freddie RIGHT AWAY like she was just WAITING for him to slip up which is... i mean... WE know he’s crazy, and will WAS putting on a show, but considering that she was /wrong/ about whether Will would kill Freddie Lounds, it kind of makes her an asshole.

Then the flimsy excuse of ‘having bone marrow poison me’ or something is ‘well NOW im harcore’ but like.. there is hardcore, and there is ‘before Hannibal i was PERFECT and always had to moral high ground, NOW im goign to work with MR PIGMAN of ALL psychopaths because im out for revenge’

I also strongly suspect she wanted in on the verger fortune, which is why she married Margot and had the kid. Even Hannibal told Margot ‘gtf away from your brother, run away, kill him, anything, you cant live like this, thats not a life’ and Alana’s like ‘oh sure, ill hitch my cart to this incredibly wealthy horse right away, i see nothing wrong here. Hannibal and Will, both actual psychopaths, didnt want to work with the clearly-evil Mr Verger, but Ill do it voluntarily’

then she TAKES HANNIBALS TOILET?

Im sorry, you run an insane asylumn, if another bad guy contacted one of your patients then YOU fucked up, your security fucked up. Thats you. 

And Hannibal, a man you dated for months and have known for years, who ISNT EVEN THE ONE THAT THREW YOU OUT THE WINDOW, you take away his toilet? He’s already been captured, he’s been in lock up for years, now youre just being cruel.

So yeah.

I dont like Alana/Margot, because i am pretty much 100% sure Alana is using Margot for her money and might well be emotionally abusive in their home life. I do not trust her.

[reidmemymo]

Not A Date (Part 2)

Perdóname but this is lowkey long, hope ju liek et :) Part 3 is written and ready, out of fear that it’d be too long already I made the smut happen in part 4 so buckle up, stay tuned, take off your shoes and stay a while fam

—

Upon arrival to y/n’s apartment, she didn’t know what to do as her mind swarmed over the thought of her going out with Spencer tonight. She naturally did what she always did when she couldn’t think straight, she cleaned.

Mid-dish washing she had gotten a call from Spencer and they agreed on a time to meet and where to meet. Under pressure on the two hours she had to get ready, she cleaned some more, took a quick shower, struggled to pick an outfit then headed out once it was time. Now as she exited the cab that stopped in front of the theater, she hoped her outfit wasn’t too casual nor too fancy. Against her own wishes after all, this was not a date.

Her worries subsided as she heard the cab drive off behind her, her eyes landed on Spencer standing by the entrance. Of course, charmingly leaned on the wall and looking down while he read one of his books.

“Spence!” She called and the boy wonder’s head snapped up from the pages of a handwriting profiling book. His face lit up at the sight of her and hers did as well when she noticed the scarf around his neck since she too wore an orange scarf for the occasion.

“Hey, y/n, haven’t seen you in a while,” he joked with a soft chuckle as she wrapped her arms around his neck lovingly, making him cautiously snake his around her waist. He smile dropped once he felt her lips touch his cheek and his brows instinctively shot up as she pulled back.

“Looks like we’ve got about twenty minutes to kill until the movie starts! You got the tickets?” He nodded and retrieved the strip of tickets and handed her hers after tearing it off of his.

“Thank you, sir. Nice scarf, by the way.” He smiled at her comment.

“You look great, you pulled it off better than I could. Did you… want to go in now or-”

“How about we take a walk? Walk and talk then run back when it’s time, yeah?” He looked down at her face, the smile she wore and the excitement in her voice compelled him to say yes. Yet he knew in his mind that they’d be stuck with front row seats when they got back, his mind also raised in alert and even more nervousness flooded him at the thought of walking with her to talk. Spencer was never prominent in the area of conversation, so what in the world would they talk about?? But how could he say no…

“Yeah, let’s walk, y/n.” He said with a charming smile that made hers grow bigger, and so they laughed while they turned away from the theater to walk down the moonlit pavement. After three minutes of comfortable silence as they walked and shared a few small comments about their surroundings, y/n asked him the question she wondered about since they were at work.

“Hey, how come you weren’t going to come after Penelope flaked? You didn’t consider going alone?” She asked him, then she noticed his mouth do its quirk again and she knew this would be a sensitive subject. He sighed and prepared for a more sad turn in conversation.

“I did, of course, I love Halloween. I’d love to do that but I do everything alone. It’s particularly difficult to enjoy the film when I’m sitting there alone with no one to turn to if I want to comment about the movie or share a snack with or laugh with like everyone else in there. It’s typical for people to go to the movies in a pair or with a group but I’d just… be there.” He confessed while his his eyes remained parallel to the sidewalk, glued to the alternating steps of his Oxford shoes. Her face softened and she swore her heart broke a little.

“Well… what about when the whole team goes out? You aren’t alone then, are you?” She inquired gently, watching his gaze stubbornly lock to the ground instead of looking back.

“Y/n, have you taken a look at me lately? Yes, the team goes out in a group and we have some fun but more often than I’d like, the locations we go to are clubs or bars. For a person like me, that is not my scene. Especially not when Morgan and Penelope team up in hopes of either getting me drunk or getting me to talk to some girl I know nothing about.” He argued, his brows coming together in the frustration that built up with every word. She felt sorry for him, yet she shrugged the feeling off knowing that isn’t what he needed. What he needs is encouragement, a confidence builder.

“Yeah, they’re both trouble, I’m sorry. Do you ever offer the others to hang out?”

“Yes well, I try to. They either pass or take a rain check and I never hear about it again.” He spoke as his voice diminished almost to a whisper.

“You know it’s not because they don’t love you or don’t like you as a person, right?” He stayed quiet, but the profiler in her could see through his micro expressions that told her that’s exactly what he thinks.

“You’re interests just don’t correlate with theirs. I’m almost sure if you offered to do something they are more likely to enjoy or know about, they’d agree to it. I know how they treat you, I’ve seen it all in my four months on this team. Trust me when I say that they love you and they think you’re amazing. Just your type of amazing isn’t something people see everyday, it scares them.” She felt relieved a bit when he looked back, listening to her words. A small smile turning his lips.

“Emily once told me you offered her to go see Solaris, Reid, which is five hours of sitting. Of course since it’s in your interest, you are willing to sit through it. For anyone else, they see it as five hours of sitting and being lost. Don’t ever think that they don’t like you because they won’t hang out with you.” He nodded slowly, intently noting what she said which he found to make a lot of sense.

“Thanks, y/n… for saying that.” He said to her. She smiled weakly.

“Tell you what, if there’s something you want to do, ask me. I might or might not decline depending on what it is or for other reasons. If it’s something you seriously want to go to, I’ll come with you.” She told him sweetly, smiling back at him. He couldn’t stop from flashing a smile too.

“Are you sure?”

“Of course! Why wouldn’t anyone want to hang out with an intelligent, multitalented, handsome man like you?” He paused once he heard the ‘handsome’ comment, yet his mind quickly answered her question.

“Cause I’m weird.”

“Okay, how?” She asked with skepticism.

“I can’t engage in normal or deep conversations, I lack knowledge of social cues and norms, Im awkward, and I spew facts as if my life depends on it. I ramble as well; therefore, I am weird.” He spoke rapidly, eager to prove his point that she didn’t seem to grasp for some reason.

“Reid, no. That’s just who you are and there’s nothing wrong with it. Plus if anyone here is weird, it’s me.”

“Not true.”

“Is to, ask my mom or my best friend or my brother. They will all tell you the same thing; I’m a know-it-all.”

“You? A know-it-all?” He asked, cocking a brow with a small smile.

“The worst! And I know, I don’t compare to fantastic Dr. Reid but it annoys the crap out of my family. Plus weirdly enough, I like memorizing lists. You know I’ve memorized the whole list of neurological disorders?” Spencer’s mouth hung open, his brows raised.

“Y/n, that’s a list from A to W with one to multiple disorders within each letter… and you don’t have an eidetic memory either.”

“A to Z actually, as of last year, but yes. No eidetic memory. Isn’t that weird?”

“No it isn’t, that’s amazing.” He complimented, their eyes locking on each other. She looked back at his hazel eyes she loved so much and made a decision on how to build some of his confidence.

“Reid, I’m going to tell you something that I don’t want to tell you and I’m upset about it but I feel like you’d need to hear it.” She watched him turn confused and cautiously they came to a stop.

“Okay…” She heard him trail off as she sucked in a deep breath and released it.

“I’ve had a big crush building up for you since my first day.” Silence followed her words, Spencer’s brows wiggled as they rose then came together. A crush? No way, he thought. Yet thought it over some more, it made sense. They’re both profilers. Of course they both sensed at times that they had a bond different from the others. Spencer recalled the way she would look at him when he’d be revealing a fact to the team on a case, it made a lot of sense. Also she would always be subtly defensive of him whenever others shut him down from sharing statistics or when they would pick on him. In the mornings she would routinely yet genuinely ask him about his day or his morning or his weekend. Could this be true?

"So you asked me out while you supposedly have a uh… c-crush on me? You made this a date… that’s against Hotch’s demands.”

“No, no, not a date. Just a very anticipated outing with a coworker of mine.”

“Who you happen to like?” He asked, a smirk forming on his face.

“Correction, who I happen to like a whole lot. And listen, if I can manage to become attracted to you even with your so called ‘weird’ qualities, what does that tell you?” She asked him and he thought hard until he met her eyes again.

“It tells me you’re very weird.” He answered, the both of them breaking into joyous laughter. After a moment they recovered, left smiling at one another. Until Spencer looked down at his watch.

“We should head back now, y/n.” He said in a low voice, not wanting their walk to end. She nodded with a grin.

“Let’s go, pretty boy.” Spencer laughed and made not one hesitant move as she linked an arm with his. Her body close to his as they made their silent pursuit back to the theater.

[shapeshifting-arch-mage]

Dance Club RP Aftermath

...We've been sitting here long enough. We should head out, too. We get down from our chair and slowly plod our way out the door.

We leave the dance club, our legs still tired from having danced for so long. We could try to get on our broom and fly back to the Pocket Dorms, but that might be a bad idea since both of us are so worn out. How would we be able to navigate our way in the air when we both have so little energy? It would probably be safer to walk back to the harbor and take a boat back.

We make our way to Main Street.

Temmie and I are slowly making our way down Main Street, heading back to the harbor. We'd like to go faster, but our legs just don't have the energy to. Man, oh man are we pooped...

Temmie and I keep walking...

...Slowly...

Come on, just a little farther, we’re almost to the harbor...

We stop walking for a moment.

“hooman... im tired...”

“i kno, i am too, but its not much farthr. just a little more and wel be there.”

“i dun wanna keep goin...”

“i kno, Tem, i kno...”

“im so tirrrrred...”

“we can stop for a sec if you want.”

“ok, human...” We stop walking and take a few deep breaths. We’re almost there. Almost. Just a little farther. Just a little. We can do this...

[Johan] As Johan walks along he gets distracted by someone in the distance. He doesn’t see the tem again but he does see some random person past them, probably in the direction of wherever they’re going. As if he suddenly gained tunnel vision, Johan begins to run over, right past the tem and human combo, and slows down again only when he’s close to the other. From behind he silently summons a pair of parasites. Wonder how this will turn out...

[Rave Witch Temmie] "wh-wha??"

We see Johan run by. When did he get here? We don't really want to see him again. We just want to go home. We wearily continue on our way to the harbor...

...Who's that? And why's Johan standing behind them?

"...wat u doin dis time...??"

[Johan] Johan doesn’t heat the tem. He doesn’t seem to hear anything. He softly tosses the parasites onto the monster’s shoulders causing them to try and knock one of them off. Before they could get to the other, it jumps to their face causing them to let out a muffled squeal, trying to grasp to get it off. Before they could yank the parasite off their mouth/nostril area, Johan pulls them back, holding the parasite closer, at the same time as his hand starts to glow. Not even a second passes by before he seems to blast a sudden burst of energy into them and immediately retracting the same amount, and it seems to overwhelm the other, knocking them out. After that horrifying few seconds, Johan softly sets them down, checking for a pulse and breathing and everything, before holding his hand against them, a soft light flowing from the monster to his hand. You gotta do what you gotta do, right?

[Rave Witch Temmie] "EEP!" We shriek. What in the world did he just do...?! Those awful little things... they weren't just taking sneaky little bites this time, Johan outright attacked that dude with them! What in the...?! What...??

"h-h-hooman...?!?1"

"y-y-yea...??"

"h-h-h-hes scarin meeeee!!1" We shudder very hard, which probably isn't a good thing considering how little energy we have left. We ought to be using what strength we have left to make the last leg of the trip back to the harbor. We're very close now, just a liiiiittle bit farther to go, but instead, we stand in place, shuddering and staring in horror at Johan and the downed monster.

[Johan] Johan continues taking magic for a bit before suddenly the monster starts snoring. At first it seems to just creep Johan out, but then suddenly one of them becomes really loud out of nowhere, causing Johan to jump back with a really weird yelp. “yeEAKANA!” he stares for a bit before trying to cover their mouth to no avail. They’re still making those sounds! He looks around in a panic before just moving them to the side of the street, hoping nothing bad happens as a result. By this point he decided that he should stop with this one and backs away, looking around to see if anyone else is around, finally seeing the tem, causing him to jump. “YACH!” he yelps. After a second he smiles nervously. “Wh-what did you-... I-I can explain! S-sorta... maybe? Not really... it’s not what you think!” He starts to panic, his face turning colors as he moves his hands and stuff trying to find the words he needs. How do you explain that it’s fine because you are a literal parasite leeching off of everyone around you?

[Rave Witch Temmie] "wawawawawat did yu just do??? who was dat?? whyd yu put yur bitey thingy on em?? why yu keep makin' bitey wormy thingys?? yur scarin me!1! and yur scarin my hooman!1! human doesnt liek dem!1!"

[Johan] Johan stammers for a bit before finally he starts whining when he speaks. “L-Look I was hungryyy! If I went any longer without a proper amount of energy I would probably die! I think. I never found out- but I don’t want to! I don’t wanna die, ya know? A-and look! They’re fine!” he holds up their arm which they immediately pull away and scratch themselves with. “see? No wounds! Not death! Completely fine! Just a bit tired, see?” He looks genuinely scared at this point. No more judgement. He doesn’t want any more judgement. Not here at least. Not alone like this.

[Rave Witch Temmie] Hungry...?

...That's right, he said he was hungry back at the dance club, and then we told him to go get food at Grillby's, but he said he "didn't need that kind" of food.

Was this what he wanted, when he said he was hungry? Is that why those Fresh parasite-lookalikes have been following us around all day? Were they trying to do to us what they just did to that poor guy? We've been running into the little nuisances all day today, and the day before. We already know that the blue one at the harbor was Johan's, but he was also at Grillby's when we found the yellow one that tried to give us fries (and bit Baku), and the ones that were harassing us at the dance club had to have come from him, too, since he was there with us for a while. ...This is why they've been following us all this time. Johan's been sending them after us to suck up our energy, just like leeches!

Temmie, sensing my discomfort, says "awawawa...!! no more wormys!1! no more biteys!!1 i dun wana get eaten!!!1 WAAAAAAAAA!1!!" We turn around and attempt to run, but we trip over because oh yeah, we're way too tired to run. Oopsie.

[Johan] Johan doesn’t hear their thought process, all he sees is their fear, which of course cause him to become more afraid. He starts to tear up, about to say something before he’s interrupted. He watches them run but jolts when they trip, running over. “are you ok?? I’m so sorry! I didn’t mea-“ he stops himself and steps back, panicking and unsure what to do. They must not want to see him again... but they might need help. What if they’re hurt? He’d probably know actually. But what if it’s a really bad bruise? What if they’re knocked out? He’s lost and confused, and doesn’t know what to do. The other two parasites he forgot to retract just watch with concern. One of them even looks offended. They’re not bad! They’re just hungry! A purple one approaches when Johan doesn’t.

[Rave Witch Temmie] "ungh..." We try to push ourself up, but don't have the energy to get ourselves off of our belly. "c-c'mon... j-just a litl... push... nnngh...!” We grunt, our voice strained. Ugh, this was the worst time to fall over. We need to get back up. We need to leave. We need to...

We flop back down, panting.

[Johan] Johan continues to panic, not sure what to do about the fallen fear endused tem. The parasite however goes to find the tem’s face, staring as if asking for permission for whatever it’s going to do. It wants to help, even if they want to kill it. Johan of course doesn’t seem to notice as he has started pacing, tears falling down his face as he continues talking to himself, panic and fear filling his mind. The second parasite just starts backing away from the situation altogether and goes back to the snoring monster to take a bit of power again. Not too much of course.

[Rave Witch Temmie] "pant... pant... pant... h-huh?? n-n-noooo!1!1 dont eat meeee!1!!1 nooooo!1!!!" We sweep our paw in front of us, trying to swat the purple parasite. "dont eat meeeee!!1"

[Johan] The parasite jumps to avoid the swatting and continues to avoid it if they continue. It looks at the tem sadly whenever the swatting stops. Maybe it can’t get too close then. It opens a small mouth and seems to blow out, a bit of a mist like light flowing out before being trapped in a ball. The purple peep practically drains itself of all of its energy into this ball, flopping over in exhaustion when it’s done. But it’s not done yet. It slowly gets back up and makes an attempt to push the light into the tem so they can get some energy back. If it succeeds in giving them energy, it speaks, a bit broken and tired sounding. “Fo-... give... him?” of course it would immediately faint from exhaustion, but if it couldn’t get the energy to them immediately it would continue straining itself until either it did or it died. Johan doesn’t notice as he’s now lost in his muttering, though he does stop for a moment when the magic is completely out of the peep.

[Rave Witch Temmie] "awawawaa... wh-wha...??"

We stop swatting, and gasp at the sight of the glowing ball of light the parasite has just created. "wat is... dat...??" We shudder and attempt to back up as the parasite pushes the ball of light at us, but we only manage to back up our head a little before the ball of light touches us.

We squeeze our eyes shut in anticipation, expecting to have our energy drained like the other monster... But instead, the opposite happens, and we feel a little bit more energized. "wh... wha?? h-how-"

And then, we hear something that neither one of us would have ever expected to hear. The parasite... TALKED to us?!?!

[Johan] Well, all that’s left now is a small deflated remains of a purple parasite thingy. Johan seems to finally realize what happened and stands, slowly and hesitantly approaching. The other parasite stops what it’s doing and goes to run over, almost sensing its partner dying. Of course it would also approach the tem and stop by the purple husk, prodding at it with its face sadly, trying to see if the other would wake up. If you think about them as living beings, it gets really sad. But really they’re just summons that have emotions and not quite developed lives yet. They only care about the well-being of the whole and one dying is only saddening for the moment. Johan takes it harder though. He actually seems to be taking it well as he’s completely silent.

[Rave Witch Temmie] We watch in bewilderment as the other parasite slithers over to check on the one that just gave us its energy. Is... Is it actually showing concern for its fellow parasite? Is it worried about it? But how...?? This is unbelievable. Fresh parasites don't act like this. There's no way a Fresh parasite would behave in such an altruistic manner as this one has. They're much too selfish for that. While being concerned about their brethren isn't entirely out of the question, I certainly wouldn't expect a Fresh parasite to put itself in harm's way in order to ensure the safety of another. To them, their own safety comes first, above all else. On the other hand, the purple parasite has just given up its own energy in order to help us. That is, without a doubt, the most un-Fresh-parasite-like behavior it could have possibly displayed. It has just done the complete polar opposite of what Fresh parasites do. There is absolutely no way a Fresh parasite would ever be willing to do something so incredibly selfless, for someone they barely know. This creature has gone completely against what being a Fresh parasite is all about. Unless...

...It's not a Fresh parasite.

Realization flashes across our face. These creatures that have been stalking us all day...

...they are NOT Fresh parasites.

[Johan] The second parasite looks up to the tem before looking behind them for Johan. It then picks up the purple one and skips away to find Johan, who is just frozen in shock and fear. He slowly goes to pick up the parasites, muttering to himself again. “It’s ok, it’s ok, I’ve got more it’s fine it’s ok, they’re not-... they’re not al-... they come back- it’s fine it’s ok-“ he starts shaking a bit, failing to calm himself down. He decides to take the parasites back for now but he finds himself falling to the ground, continuing the mutterings and the crying. Yeah ok he’s not taking it well.

[Rave Witch Temmie] They can't be Fresh parasites- they just can't be! They may be colorful and slug-shaped like Fresh parasites, but they aren't acting like Fresh parasites right now at all! Looking out for each other, giving us energy, talking to us without a host- heck, they haven't even been trying to take over anyone's bodies, just suck energy from them, like fleas, ticks, leeches, or other such external parasites would do. But Freshes are internal parasites. They need to stay inside their host to stay safe. The only reason they'd ever come out is to transfer to a new host, but again, these parasites only seem interested in leeching energy from others, not taking control of them.

Another odd thing is that Johan said that he was hungry, and yet it's the parasites that are doing all the energy-sucking... are they able to transfer their energy back to him somehow? Is there a mature parasite inside of Johan that's sending the lesser ones out to gather energy for it? This is all so unusual... Although Temmie doesn't know what Fresh parasites are (or really any parasites, for that matter), she does sense my confusion, and feels confused, herself, as a result. We finally manage to push ourselves up to a kneeling position, and turn to face Johan. "...yu ok??"

[Johan] Johan has curled up on the ground, hugging himself and trying to stop his crying and fear. When the tem speaks he looks up, quivering as he can’t resist the tears falling from his face. The parasites are gone, no one else is around. He is alone and afraid, and it shows clearly. “P-Please... don’t kill me!” he curls up more, the tape holding his glasses up starting to peel off causing his eyes to be visible. They’re closed at the moment, but they might be able to be seen later.

[Rave Witch Temmie] Kill...? Kill him?? What in the world is he... just a few moments ago, Temmie and I were thinking that we were the ones in danger! "wawawa...??? w-wat u talkin about?" We ask anxiously. His panicking is making us feel panicky, too.

[Johan] “W-well-...” he looks away, scooting back. “anyone else would, r-right? What do I have to know you wouldn’t also, for knowing I’m a parasite?” he shifts to push his glasses back up, but still trying to seem small. In a way it works, seeing as how he’s just a kid. Who knows what age, but still less than 20 or so.

[Rave Witch Temmie] "w-w-w-wa?? wat yu mean? wats a parry site??"

[Johan] Johan slowly uncurls when he hears them speak. “W-Well. A parasite is defined by a creature that takes from others without doing anything in return. Basically, a one sided deal. I-I try not to kill anyone, b-but I still need to take energy to survive. Apparently regular food doesn’t seem to work. It probably doesn’t process right in larger amounts. I don’t know really.” He shrugs nervously. At least he’s not curled up anymore. His glasses fall again for a second to reveal what look to be a broken up heart shape and the other a weird star. It’s hard to tell since he pushes them back up the moment he notices his glasses fell.

[Rave Witch Temmie] "are... are yu... yu gonna be ok??"

[Johan] Johan nods, looking up again trying to smile. “Maybe. I think I got enough for now, and no one’s hurt, right? They’ll get up in a few hours I think. Maybe less. The first one didn’t have much to spare though...” He stands up, holding his glasses to his face. “Yea, I’ll be fine...”

[Rave Witch Temmie] We look to the downed monster. "...yu sure hes gonna be ok??" We walk over and rub their head. "hey!1 yu ok??"

[Johan] Well if it’s the one they actually saw him take from then they don’t respond, being fast asleep. Snoring continues as what is probably some sort of frog monster with bull horns is just completely knocked out. “I-I think so. I make sure I don’t take too much. You’re ok after all, right?” Maybe he shouldn’t have mentioned that night actually.

[Rave Witch Temmie] "yea, im feelin a litl bettr... cuz yur purpl thing made me feel bettr..." I suppose there's not much else we can do at this point. The other monster isn't waking up, and, although we can walk again, we don't have the energy to try to move the other out of the street. They are at least still breathing, though, so as long as no one steps on them while they're out cold, I suppose we won't need to worry about them. Heck, maybe the next person to find them laying out here could help them. But as for us, it's time to go home and get some well-deserved rest. We look back at Johan one last time and say...

"...thanks."

[Johan] Johan watches, a bit concerned but mostly calmed down. At the last part he smiles softly, genuinely glad they don’t seem so afraid of him anymore. “You’re welcome.” He’s not sure for what, it just made sense to make sure they stayed alive for a later date, but what does he know? He’s a literal parasite with the only intent of survival. What would he know about what others think?

[Rave Witch Temmie] And with that, we turn and walk the rest of the way to the harbor.

At last, at long last we have made it back to the harbor. It's finally time for us to go back to our nice, safe, cozy room in the Pocket Dorms and get some sleep. We board a boat, sit back, and relax as it takes us back to the Pocket Dorms.

[shapeshifting-arch-mage]

9/23/2018, Part 1

We are now running through the forest, huffing and puffing, trying to catch up to Baku.

"Temmie... why are we-"

"i gota get to Baku! i gota get to Baku!"

"But wh-"

"i gota tell him wy i havent ben goin to hapy fun raevtime!1!"

Against my wishes, we continue to run toward the oasis.

[Baku] After leaving the haunted house Baku found himself wandering toward the oasis, he had heard about this place in the past and wanted to check it out himself. It was much warmer here and quiet. "Well that was an adventure."

[Sirius] Sirius would soon pop out of the ground, attempting to shake off the frost on his petals. “Yeah...” He would start thinking about what just happened, and spaced out due to it, deep thoughts. Why didn’t he get fear? He has seen far worse though, mostly monsters beating each other, yet he felt no fear from that either, and only recently he figured out he could dislike or like something... was that technically fear? Over the fact he disliked so much of his home and the haunted house? Right, Baku mentioned not being able to feel much either, should he open up? Hell if he knew, something told him that he shouldn’t, but he didn’t honestly care either way, maybe he should... but not right now he’s in hecking space-

[Baku] Baku chuckled. "Yer a serious space case ya know, what's on yer mind anyway?"

[Rave Witch Temmie] pant... pant... pant... We just make it to the oasis before our legs give out and we collapse. We lay face-down on the ground, panting hard.

[Sirius] Upon hearing Baku’s voice, he fell out of space and looked at them, deciding to tell them the truth, as he felt that would be something he would do. “Oh... uh... I happen to not feel much either... I mostly think on why I don’t feel anything.. other than likes and dislikes...” He wasn’t sure if the other would believe him, but it was possible, all the other Floweys he met could feel some things, but him? No he wasn’t like them...

[Rave Witch Temmie] pant... pant... pant... We weakly lift our head and pick up our hat, which fell off when we landed on the ground.

[Baku] Baku chuckled. "Yer different than most o' yer kind aren't ya?" At that Baku sat down next to the flower and grinned. "Fer my kind not having emotions is normal, we're born wit out 'em."

[Rave Witch Temmie] "...huh??" Temmie is curious. We prop ourself up on our belly and listen in on the conversation.

[Sirius] “Yeah... I’m pretty different... I heard the others don’t feel love and compassion...” He would blink, looking at Baku again. “So you’re pretending too?” Now he has found a lead, maybe his condition has something to do with this skeleton... and their kind... although he didn’t know what Baku meant by... their kind... was there another type of skeleton? He thinks, trying to prevent himself from spacing out, but doing that was difficult for him, he had nothing else to focus on after all.

[Baku] Baku laughed. "Yes, in a sense. I mean we can learn emotions by watchin' others or learnin' about 'em as we go through life. Then again most o' us aren't liked much so few o' us live long."

[Rave Witch Temmie] "b-but i liek u!1!"

"Temmie!" I think, "Don't interrupt! They're having a private conversa-"

"i liek yu a lot!1!! ur my fav dj!!1!"

[Sirius] Sirius was about to say something, but then he heard Temmie speak up, he would look over, possibly staring into their soul on accident, then he spoke up. “Lucky... I have watched others too, and I still feel nothing.” He would just continue the conversation as normal, because he couldn’t care less about Temmie being there. More like he didn’t mind, it was only one other person... not like a lot of people were listening in.

[Baku] Baku looked over when he heard the familiar voice of Temmie and chuckled. "Appreciate dat chica, but others don't share yer opinion." With that said he turned his attention back to the flower. "I ain't lucky, I still don't fully understand emotions myself but in all honesty I don't really wanna, they seem like more o' a hassle than an asset if ya ask me."

[Rave Witch Temmie] Others don't share her opinion? The heck's he talking about? At least, that's what Temmie's thinking. I know exactly what he means by that, but all Temmie can do is cry out in confusion, "w-w-w-waaaaa???"

We try to stand up, but just end up falling back on our belly again. "oof!"

We pant a few more times, and then say, "wh-wh-who dont like u?? wy som1 dont like u?? ur da best dj!1!" Wait, I can answer that question for her. In our minds, I replay the memory of my first meeting with Baku...

"...oh ya, her..." She still doesn't understand what there is not to like about Baku, though. "but wy peeps dun like u??"

[Sirius] “Feeling nothing isn’t the best way to go... that’s how I feel anyway, you can’t make friends all that well, and the people you should care about the most... they end up leaving you at some point, or constantly worry over you until you end up pretending that you care, it’s... so empty.  I dislike it.” Sirius would look at the water, sighing. “It’s like... hell? I guess...? It’s... hard to explain...”

[Baku] "I disagree, I've seen what havin' emotions can do ta a person an' I hate it." At that his aura seemed to darken a little. "Emotions only hurt ya in the long run so they're funking pointless, at least without 'em I can live freely doin' my own thing, never havin' ta hurt because someone else decided I wasn't worth their time."

[Rave Witch Temmie] We finally manage to pick ourselves up from the ground. We start to waddle closer to Baku...

"Baku, wat u talkin about? wat u mean u dont liek feelins??"

"Temmie, please, don't..."

"i liek feelins! dey feel gud! u make me feel gud! u da best! an-" I finally manage to take control of our mouth for a second and get my own words in.

"nnnnNNNO!1! hes NOT da best!1!! hes NOT nice!!1"

"...awawawa?? hooman?!? i tot u likd him to!!1"

[Sirius] “...there’s a contradiction in that second sentence. When you cant feel emotions, there is no happiness, there’s nothing, I know that first hand, having been there as an Asriel, watching my family, they looked so happy, and I was never happy with them. It... makes you not want to live, I don’t even know why I’m still here. Because it’s pointless. I tried so hard to feel something, anything, and all I have found is that I can like, dislike, and want something. That’s it.” The more Sirius talked, the more dead he sounded, his eyes were empty voids, he was surely showing a point. “Even if feeling something can hurt others, it’s worse feeling absolutely nothing. Because you can’t care about the people you want to care about, you can’t ever be happy.” God this got dark fast.

[Rave Witch Temmie] "i didnt say i didnt like him! i sed hes not nice!"

"but he gav me pretty glow necklas!1!"

"yea, but just cuz hes nice to you doesnt mean hes nice to every1!"

"wy not?"

"cuz hes bad at it!"

"wat yu mean?"

"hes just nice to you cuz you... you..."

...How do I put this without hurting her feelings? I want to tell her that, the reason Baku was nice to her was because she's such a kiss-up, but that wouldn't be a nice thing to say... and the last thing I want to do is sound like a jerk to Temmie. I'm not a jerk, rather, the one we're talking about is the jerk...

[Baku] Baku chuckled darkly. "That is where our opinions differ my man. I live freely an' do what I want, there's no void in my life, just fun." At that he grinned and looked to the sky. "I get ta party an' have a blast without a care in the world."

[Rave Witch Temmie] I decide to just drop the issue. Hearing Baku mention partying reminds Temmie of why she wanted to follow him here in the first place. We walk over to Baku's side. "hey Baku, uhhhh..."

[Sirius] “Well... you can feel joy... it seems. So you only want to feel joy? Happiness? That’s different compared to nothing...” Sirius wouldn’t press more on the issue after this, in fact, he didn’t want to for once. Ooooh another lead! Back into space he goes.

[Baku] "Eh maybe, don't really know don't really care, I like things as they are." At that Baku laid down on the ground, watching the sky. "I live my life as a DJ an' I'm fine wit dat."

[Rave Witch Temmie] "Temmie, I think he's busy-" 

"hey Baku, uhhh... im sorry i couldnt go to ur raves, cuz ive been livin wit hooman, and she doesnt kno were ur raves are, so we couldnt go..."

We press our paws together anxiously. "ive been wantin to go but i couldnt cuz of hooman... im sorry..."

[Sirius] Sirius would stay silent, now he listens in, he didn’t know what else to say on this matter, other than an “ok” or “mhm” god conversation is hard.

[Baku] Baku grinned at the Temmie. "Hey no worries chica, ya don't have ta show up at every single one, just try to make it ta the ones ya can."

[Rave Witch Temmie] "i-i wannaaaaa..." We frown. "but human is- mmmmf!" There I go slapping our paw over our mouth again. But this time, Temmie manages to remove it and continue speaking.

"i wana take human to ur rave!1! i told her shes gota go somtime!1 its da best rave evr!11 but shes scar-mmf!" And back over our mouth the paw goes...

...but only for a second. "hooman, wy yu keep doin dat?"

[Baku] Baku smirked. "I know exactly why she's doin' it, she doesn't want me ta find out who she is even though I already know exactly who she is, ain't dat right Cookie."

[Rave Witch Temmie] Upon hearing that last word...

...

...We freeze.

All we- or I- can do, is s t a r e, wide-eyed, mouth agape, like we've just seen a ghost. But, if I'm being honest, seeing a ghost wouldn't have been nearly as scary as what I just heard Baku say right now.

H o w d i d h e f i n d o u t ? ?

[Baku] Baku laughed. "Did ya really think I wouldn't notice, actions speak louder than words ya know. The constant stopping of Temmie every time it was even remotely possible she could give ya away was a red flag sweetheart, I'm no fool."

[Rave Witch Temmie] "h-h-hooman...???" Temmie thinks, my fear rubbing off onto her, "h-how does Baku no about... cookys??"

"THAT'S WHAT I'D LIKE TO- wait, cookies??"

"ya, cooky poshin!1! remembr?? were gona make cooky poshin!1!"

...The cookie potion. That's right... I had completely forgotten about that. Temmie must have mistakenly thought that Baku was referring to the magic cookie potion we still haven't made, and not to... well, me...

...Which gives me an idea. In a last-ditch effort to save face, we ask,

"...w-w-w-what cookies?? i dont got any cookies..."

[Baku] Baku grinned. "Really you're gonna try an' pull dat shiz wit me, what part o' I'm no fool do ya not get hm? I know it's you sweetheart stop tryin' ta hide."

[Rave Witch Temmie] "i dont got no cookys1!1"

At this point, this is kind of both of us saying this. I never actually told Temmie that I call myself Cookie, since I never felt the need to (and also to prevent her from spilling the beans to Baku about it). So, she still doesn't realize that Baku is talking about me, and not the magic potion we've been wanting to make. I, meanwhile, am just denying that I'm Cookie. Because I never told Baku that I call myself that. And yet he still found out.

[Baku] "Eh whatever suit yourself sweetheart, but trust me yer not very good at hidin'." At that Baku stood up and stretched. He then turned to the flower who was sitting there spacing out once more. "Well anyway I'm gonna go walk around, follow if ya want my petaled bro but otherwise I'm ditchin' this place." At that he turned to leave the oasis.

[Rave Witch Temmie] Normally, Temmie would have wasted no time following Baku wherever he was headed, but right now, we are in too much shock to do anything but stand there, like a deer in the headlights.

"hooman... howd Baku no about cookys??"

"He wasn't talking about cookies, Temmie. He was talking about me."

"waaa?? but ur not a cooky!1! ur a hooman!1!"

"Yes, I am. But... I like to call myself... Cookie..."

[Sirius] Sirius would have followed Baku, only because he wanted to leave as well, this was odd, not like he knew how this skeleton was... it was more like he was interested in how he worked, how he was able to be happy despite being born without them, that interested him the most, how was that possible?

[Rave Witch Temmie] "Soft Cookie. I call myself Soft Cookie. It's not my real name; it's actually the name of one of my shape-shifted forms... but I like the name. It has a nice ring to it. But how in the world... how did Baku find that out?!? I never told him... I made certain not to ever tell him. So how he found out... it makes absolutely no sense that he found out! Unless..."

"...ya?"

"...Someone else told him..."

Continuing to stand out here in the forest isn't going to do us any good, though. We should probably head back to the resort. We begin to make our way out of the forest.

...Slowly.

We walk through the forest, and back to the resort; our looming sense of dread never leaving us.