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#which like. these girls were losers as well. they were just a group of losers rather than one lone loser like me
sarahreesbrennan · 2 days
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Also also: is there any way, or will there be any way, for readers without whichever special edition (?) it’s in to read “Letters to My Lady from the Abyss…”? Reading your Reddit AMA in a desire to know more about this wonderful book and the idea of a tiny bit extra has me 👀
Thank you for wishing to know more! FairyLoot special edition is the special edition with bonus content. I will explain more. FairyLoot is a wonderful UK-based group who make fancy special editions for their monthly boxes. People sign up for FairyLoot and get books picked for them. You can get Young Adult, Adult Fantasy, or Romantasy, or a combination thereof - Long Live Evil was the August Adult Fantasy pick - and you can buy other special editions from their website. So the FairyLoot folks are Tastemakers as well as makers of beautiful objects. (ISN’T IT BEAUTIFUL? Pictures stolen. Interior art by Bon Orthwick who got Marius’s hair PERFECT.)
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But you can’t buy the monthly boxes, unless they have extras! If they do have extra Evils to buy, I will put up a link.
There are many boxes now, but FairyLoot and Illumicrate are the two biggest and have made a lot more people embrace reading and see books as a special treat. Waterstones and Barnes & Noble have started making special editions of books because of them. A while back I knew none of this, because I was staying away from publishing, working with IP books (very different branch of publishing) and training for a different job. But then I did a catch-up call with my frien. She talked about FairyLoot. I did not understand her and thought maybe the deadlines had got on top of her and she believed fairies had looted her manuscript.
Holly: So these FairyLoot editions have (She holds up a copy of… I think… the Coldest Girl In Coldtown?) been amazing for UK sales.
Sarah: Sorry but why are these books so beautiful?
Holly: Because I just explained to you why, girl. Sarah: Can I have this.
Holly: No they’re limited!
So then I knew FairyLoot was a Giant Deal and they were offered Long Live Evil but I was sure they wouldn’t pick me.
My lovely editor Jenni: great news, the FairyLoot people picked you! Sarah: are you. are you quite sure.
Jenni: … yes? Could you write them some bonus content? Sarah: YES! A thing I can do for them? Oh yes! Here’s three things I can do. Tell them they can pick which one they would like!
I wrote a letter for them as well, to be bound in with the book. But the bonus content is an extra adventure or point of view you didn’t get to see in the main book. FairyLoot picks what they think their readers might like most.
I really like epistolary novels, where the action is told though letters, such as Jane Austen’s Lady Susan and Amal El Mohtar and Max Gladstone’s This Is How You Lose The Time War. So I thought it would be fun to do a story through letters!
Obviously I then had a moment of dark self-doubt.
Sarah: O my god why did they pick this nobody’s going to like him what shall I do! Holly: When I was writing Cardan’s letters you said ‘epistolary is so fun, you said, this is a piece of cake, you said, get in loser we’re writing romantically sinister letters, you said…’
Sarah: my Vision is a romantic The Screwtape Letters. Holly: … oh dear. Okay. Get in loser we’re writing romantically sinister letters.
And so with a lil help from my kind frien, I wrote Letters to My Lady From the Abyss, which is an epistolary short story with a POV we don’t get in book 1 and an adventure we don’t get to see. But I did write it, as you see, for FairyLoot so it belongs to them and it’s up to them. I think I might get it back in a year and then I’ll put it up on my website. I will let you know!
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I am so sorry for this very long explanation, I just wanted to let you know what was up.
Should you read it, I hope you enjoy. And I will write more bonus content, I promise!
Also speaking of FairyLoot, they’re doing a readalong of Long Live Evil right now if anyone might like to chat about the book. Here’s a link to people talking about chapters 1-7 - they will do a different chunk every day! I like that people are choosing favourite characters, so far the Cobra, Key and Emer have the votes!
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tinyarsonist · 8 months
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Volume: Up
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"I bet I can make you scream in Korean."
Summary: In which heart throb K-Pop Idol, Bangchan, just shows you how 'Christopher' he can really be.
MDNI 18+ Only
TW: idol!Chan, IdolTrainee!Y/N(fem!), drinking, piv, unprotected sex (wrap it up), smut in general, dirty talk, swearing, masturbation, dumification, nipple play (fem!), cum on stomach, PleasureDom!Chan, switch!reader (fem!), pull out, cum on stomach, let me know if I missed anything!
Italics are in Korean. Bold is in Spanish. Rest in English.
Volume Series: Part One | Part Two | ?
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You were still in awe.
You started your career as an idol fairly late in the game, making you older than most. But, when you entered the world of K-pop, you knew this was what you were meant to do. You were already creating music since you were young, and how hard could it be?
Very.
There were days as a trainee when you felt like giving up. You left your friends and family back home to pursue your dream, and after years, you still felt like you were right back at the same spot you started. Never moving. Stagnant.
That's when you discovered Stray Kids. Watching their debut to where they are now. It motivated you.
Then, one day, your company announces that they want you to lead a team. They presented you with suitable candidates for your girl group, but something in you felt like something wasn't right. "Sorry," you apologize to your board. "But, if I may be so bold as to recruit my own members?"
You wanted a family. Craved friendship beyond just another gig. And, well, let's say it worked out very well for you.
This brings you to the present day--standing in DIV studio, surrounded by its members, to do an interview. Your group was just starting out and already doing well. You've posted a couple of dance practices and some ballad covers you performed as a group, tracking some major views across all social media. DIV wanted to be the first to be a part of the soon-to-be international hype.
"You ready?" Eric smiled at you as the crew set up your microphone. You nodded happily. The rest of your group couldn't make it due to schedule. It felt weird not having the rest of your girls around you, but knew this wasn't an opportunity you just passed up.
Time passes, and so far, the interview is going great. It was amazing being around like-minded people. And, it was also nice being able to curse and not have to worry about your 'imagine' among them. They were free to be who they wanted. They wanted to break the mold; conformity was not in their dictionary. It took a while to let your company agree to the interview in the first place, but this was the direction you wanted to take the group. To be yourself and just produce music.
"Okay, so next up is the heart rate challenge." Eric smiled. You were divided into teams; you and Eric vs. Peniel and BM. The winner would be dubbed by the lowest combined heart rate.
"You're going down!" BM teased as Peniel hyped him up in the back. You grin brightly.
"Considering you boys are literally jumping around before the monitor is even placed, I think it's safe to say we'll win."
"Oh okay, that's how it's gonna be??" Peniel laughed. "Then let's make a bet; the loser buys everyone barbeque!"
Eric and you agreed in a heartbeat. You were already craving galbi and rice. Peniel essentially just bought the dinner you were going to buy tonight anyway.
As the heart monitors are placed, you try your best to stay calm. You were an anxious person in general, but when push comes to shove, you always had a way of relaxing yourself.
Peniel and BM went first. Eric and you teased them relentlessly during their time duration of 5 minutes. Peniel started blushing during his time up when you started throwing winks and kisses his way. Their combined score was 250.
"That's not far!" Peniel groaned as the video crew asked for a short break to recalibrate their equipment. "She's too cute, like how does someone not get flustered?"
"It's all fun and games in love and war," you winked at him. Everyone laughed except Peniel, who just took out his phone and pouted. His fingers typed furiously on his keyboard. Once it was time to get the cameras rolling again, Peniel had a knowing smirk on his face. You couldn't help but wonder what he was concocting. You just knew he was plotting his revenge against you.
Eric went first. Despite the constant harassment Peniel and BM gave him, you couldn't help but laugh at their jabs. "You're supposed to be on my team!" Eric roared at you at his last 10 seconds on the clock. Despite everything, his heart rate totaled to 120. All you had to do was ignore the comments for a minute. You got this. You sat down in the middle of the floor and crossed your legs, getting in an almost meditative position. The rest followed. Then the buzzer started.
"So," Peniel started as soon as the timer started going. "You learned Korean by yourself, right?"
You shot him a distrusting glance. "Yes..."
Peniel and BM nodded their heads slowly. "Interesting"/"Yes, yes, very interesting." Eric shot you a glance. He could feel it, too. Based on how the two acted Eric's turn was completely different, they were calm. Too calm. They were up to something.
"One might say," Peniel feigned thoughtfulness by stroking his chin. "You had an interest in learning Korean before you even had thought of becoming a trainee."
Crap. He saw the clip.
Before your group days, you would do little lives here and there. Just want to document your early days and interact with anyone who wants to chat. During that time, you mentioned the real reason you learned Korean was to easily watch interviews without the need for subtitles. Then you casually mentioned how much of a fan you were for a certain boy group. Your fans, which was very little back then, took those clips and circulated them online. Which was fine. It gained some traction that you were a STAY and helped grow your platform. It was a bit embarrassing, essentially admitting that you only learned the language to watch their episodes and lives to get full context. But, hey, it also helped you get to where you are today.
Getting bullied by two idols so they don't have to pay for your dinner.
"Yes, Peniel. I learned Korean so I can watch Stray Kids' interviews live." You roll your eyes but keep track of where your monitor is. 95bpm. Not bad. So long as you stayed below 130, that galbi was yours.
Peniel and BM continued to stroke their chins. "Interesting"/"Yes, yes, very... Stray Kids fan. Very cool"
Peniel held up a finger before leaving the room. You looked around at the crew, confused. Eric laughed and peered after him; "Where is he going?"
His question was answered as Peniel stepped back into the room with a shorter figure behind him. You moved around to peer behind Peniel, and when you locked eyes with the guest, your heart rate shot up. 110bpm.
Eric and BM rose to give a small bow when Chan said his hellos. You stayed still in your place. Embarrassment immediately washed over you. But you took a deep breath in and out, 3 minutes until you can freak out. 3 minutes, and you can process every single emotion you are feeling.
Chan gave you a little wave, his dimples showing as he smiled. Ugh, he might as well shoot you in the heart right now.
"You're not gonna stand up?" Peniel teased. You immediately shook your head. As much as you wanted to say hi, dinner was calling your name. Seeing Chan in the flesh was amazing. But Galbi beat everything at this moment. BM smiled brightly and motioned for Chan to take a seat next to you. How sweet.
2 minutes. 115bpm.
You bowed your head slightly to say hello, still a bit too stunned to speak. Chan gave a small head bow back. "Sorry about this," he chuckled. You told him it was okay, but still unable to make eye contact. Despite that, you knew he looked incredible. He always did.
Focus! You tried to snap yourself out of it and took deep breaths. In and out. In and out.
"So... you learned Korean to watch us live? That's sweet," Chan felt awkward all of a sudden. When Peniel texted him, this wasn't what he expected to be doing during the interview. "How many languages do you know?"
You close your eyes and focus back on the game. Here you were making casual conversation, while 3 other idols were jabbing at you, trying to get your heart rate back up. "Four; English, Korean, Japanese, and Spanish."
"Holy crap, how is it going down?!" Eric looked at the monitor and backed up at you. You kept your eyes closed, trying to maintain a steady rhythm. Everyone but Chan was losing their shit.
You could hear BM jump to his feet. The impending doom of a very large bill drove his heart rate up. "Chan, do something!" He exclaimed in Korean. Chan giggled next to you; "What? What do I do?"
"Hit on her!" Peniel got up as well. All attention is now on Chan. Eric stood up and pointed at the two competitors; "Hey! Hey! You leave her alone!"
You couldn't help but chuckle; "I was subscribed to his bubble. I was in the trenches with the rest of STAY. There's nothing he can say that I haven't heard."
Chan clicked his teeth with his tongue. His eyes narrowed. A challenge. He looked at you, with your eyes still closed, before casting his gaze over at Eric. "Anyway, we can mute our mics for a sec?"
Your eyes shot open.
1 minute. 120bpm.
BM ran over to mute your mic. As soon as he backed up, Chan leaned in close to your ear. His breath tickled your cheek, and you had to close your eyes again. 125 bpm. 30 seconds.
"I bet I can make you scream in Korean."
Chan wasn't expecting you to turn your head so quickly towards him. The way your face flushed. Your eyes wide. Everything about you was making his heart race. You locked eyes with him and felt like you couldn't breathe. This was it. That free galbi was gone.
The buzzer went off.
Everyone turned to the monitor.
129bpm.
You shot up from your seat and hugged Eric. Peniel and BM groaned at their loss. Chan laughed as he watched the two of you jumping around, singing about free barbeque.
He took a moment to sneak a look at you, his gaze traveling up and down. The way your hair bounced with you and how your outfit was snuggling your curves just right. He stood up as Eric said their sign-off. Once the cameras were shut off, the teasing started between the four. Peniel placed his arm around the younger idol and pulled him in a side hug. "It's okay," he reassured Chan. "It's not entirely your fault. A good majority of it. But, not fully."
Chan laughed and rolled his eyes. Everyone came up to thank him for coming over. That's when he locked eyes with you again, giving him a bright smile.
You gave the bow you weren't able to give before, formally introducing yourself. You all talked for a bit until you felt your hunger start to spike up; "Okay, so when are we getting dinner?"
The group settled for a time later tonight so everyone could get ready. BM invites Chan to tag along.
"No no," Chan shook his head, not wanting to impose. Peniel tickled his stomach as the rest of the group tried to get him to agree. You couldn't help but chime in. Part of you being selfish and wanting to spend more time with him and also wanting to get a jab in at Peniel and BM; "Come on, it'll be fun. And free!"
Chan looked at you. It was subtle, but his cheeks turned a bit red. "Y-yea, okay."
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Chan made his way back to his dorm. The rest of the members who share the space are away on their own schedules. It was rare for Chan to spend the night alone.
He groaned as he plopped on the couch. He was still a bit jet lagged from flying from NYC back home. Laying his head on the back of the couch, he tried to take a nap before having to get ready to head out for dinner with you and the rest of the group.
You.
His mind was restless, and for some reason, they kept fluttering back to you. No matter how much he tried to push them out, he couldn't stop thinking about your big doe eyes. The way your breath hitched as he leaned in. The perfume you were wearing.
Was it Channel? Gucci? Whatever it was, it was flowery like a spring day. He could still smell it on his clothes oh so slightly.
Biting his lower lip, he got up from his seat and headed to the shower. The warm water was welcoming as he tried to clear his head. Unfortunately, it seemed there was only one thing to rid him of these thoughts.
The amount of guilt he felt once he stroked his cock to the thought of you was soon discarded as his mind wandered even more.
What were you like? Did you relinquish control or demand it? Were your lips as soft as he can imagine? Your mouth--oh God. How would it feel to have it wrapped around him? Were you a moaner? A screamer? Could he scramble your brain so much that you scream for him in Korean? Would you come in multiple languages?
He sped up his pace even faster. Water cascaded down his back as he faced the tile bathroom wall. One hand on the structure to ground him as he lost himself at the thought of you. He leaned his head back as he felt himself building and building. The warm water was a comforting feeling on his scalp.
The way he would take you as soon as you entered the dorm. No words, just a clash of flesh as he stripped you of your clothes and bent you over the couch. He wouldn't waste any time and would just thrust into your--oh God. How would you feel around his dick? How tight--
He muffled a moan as he came on his hand. The shower washed away any evidence of his inappropriate thoughts of you. He panted heavily and stood under the water for a couple of moments, pleasure rippling through him soon to be replaced with an abundant amount of guilt for getting off to someone he barely knew.
Maybe that was the thrill of it. Maybe the thought of having someone who didn't know his ups and downs is what did it for him.
Chan didn't have time to dwell on the thought as the time to meet up was fast approaching. And he hated to admit, but the thought of seeing you made his now softening cock twitch.
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By the time Chan arrived at the restaurant, platters and drinks were spread across the shared table. BM and Peniel bought out a room so they could enjoy their meal without prying eyes. Chan could hear them hollering in the room before he even opened the door. His ears rang as they all loudly greeted him.
"Look who finally made it!" Peniel laughed as Chan took a seat across from them. Eric and BM were putting meat on the grill as they said their greetings. Chan couldn't help but scan the room, taking note that you weren't there. He tried to play it cool as he asked if you were running late.
"She texted us saying there was something she needed to finish up at home," BM answered him. Eric couldn't help but wiggle his eyebrows at Chan.
"Why? Scared she might not come?"
"No, no." Chan chuckled awkwardly while looking off to the side. "Was just wondering, is all."
The boys all made cooing noises. A flush of embarrassment washed over Chan at their teasing. Peniel smirked; "Wouldn't blame you, she's gorgeous!"
Chan poured himself a shot of soju, trying his best to drown out their teasing and take the stress away. The three men quit their teasing and talked about mundane things; schedules, new music coming out, and how big the bags under Chan's eyes were.
"I just flew back from New York!"
"Doesn't matter! Ever heard of eye cream!"
They were laughing at one another by the time you entered the room. Everyone stood up to greet you with a bow, and you bowed back. Gesturing for them to take their seats again. "Sounds like a party in here," you smiled as you took a seat next to Chan. He took note of how you wore your hair up in a messy bun, showing off your silver necklace. That flowery smell radiated off of you, and he had to lean a bit to the side so it didn't flood his senses in all the right ways.
"Is that soju or vodka?" You spot a filled shot glass from across the table. "Actually, it doesn't matter. Hand me it."
Chan watched you down the shot with a smile and motioned for Eric to pour you another one. "Hard day?"
The second shot went down a bit smoother and you gave him a grin. "You can say that."
He didn't need to know that the line he whispered in your ear had stressed you out to your core. It was possibly the hottest thing any man has ever said to you. It was all you could think about by the time you reached your dorm. His voice echoed in the back of your mind causing your body to feel hot.
He didn't need to know the real reason why you were late to dinner.
That you were squirming on your bed, rubbing yourself furiously between your legs. Trying to get all the tension out of your body before having to see him again.
And now you were sitting next to him. The man responsible for one of the best solo sessions in your life.
"I mean, I did have to spend half the day with these three." You gestured to the rest of the group who just booed at you. Eric rolled up a napkin and threw it your way, causing you to laugh.
As you and the group ate and drank, the room was beginning to get louder and louder. It wasn't long until everyone became tipsy.
You just finished cooking up your Galbi and offered it to the rest of the group who everyone, except Chan, declined. You used the tongs to bring it over to his plate before attempting to cut it. "Damn things," you huffed under your breath. The scissors were dull and worn out. Trying to cut through the meat was as effective as slicing a rib-eye with a spoon.
"Here," Chan grabbed the tongs and scissors from your hand. Despite the very brief time that his fingers brushed yours, you couldn't help but blush a bit as he gave you your half. You didn't have time to feel embarrassed as you caught Eric eyeing the two of you. He had his fingers interlaced and resting his head on them.
"You two look cute together~"
"Shut up," you mumble and grab some kimchi to add to your plate.
Chan sat quietly next to you. He plopped some food in his mouth, the best excuse he had to not comment. BM chuckled before pouring another round of drinks. "What did you say to her anyway? Peniel was screaming so loud I couldn't even hear it."
The two of you were sitting so close to one another, that you could feel Chan stiffen next to you. No doubt, wanting to avoid another round of ridicule from his colleagues.
"Awe, jealous he wasn't whispering in your ear instead?"
That snarky reply was all it took for the other two boys to holler and tease the living crap out of him. As the night progressed, soon talk of continuing the party commenced. Chan mentioned he had a free dorm tonight.
"You in?"  Eric asked you. You looked up from your plate of Galbi and rice. You were so distracted by your plate that you didn't realize they were all waiting for your answer. You hesitated. You obviously had this attraction to Chan since the interview. Hell since even before you became a trainee. The frustration of him being so near, mixed with alcohol, might just be the equation for something disastrous.
Chan bit his lower lip while sneaking a glance at you. He knew it was stupid to invite everyone over. To invite you over. He was already feeling the effects of drinking so much, trying to keep pace with everyone. What if he slipped up? Did something that made you hate him?
But then a wonderful thought popped into his mind: What if something amazing happened?
"It'll be fun," Chan gave you his shy grin. Your heart raced as you two locked eyes. How could you say no to that face?
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"You got this," you whispered to yourself as you stood in front of Chan's door. It wasn't every day you're invited to a celebrity's apartment. Especially one that you've imagined in bed with when you're stressed out after work. Everyone left in their own taxi after dinner, planning to meet up at Chan's. You stayed a bit behind to make some phone calls to your family overseas, promising that you would be there soon. "Totally normal get-together. Nothing to worry about."
After a couple of seconds, you gather enough courage to knock on the door. A moment or two the door swings open and Chan stands there. God, he looked great with his messy hair, black tee, and joggers. Giving him that ready-for-bed look--
"Wait, were you asleep?"
Chan's face turned red. He was in bed. But he definitely wasn't sleeping.
"They didn't text you? They got a call on the way over, their schedule moved up earlier in the morning so they headed back home."
Oh.
You pull out your phone and groan. "Batteries dead." You just had to make those calls? You knew your mom could talk your ear off.
"Sorry," you put the phone back in your pocket. Taking a step back, you start to head out. "Have a good night."
"Wait!" He couldn't just let you leave. It could be from all the alcohol, but watching you saunter away felt wrong. He wanted you near him. To stay. "It's late... You can charge your phone and call a cab here if you want."
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You didn't fight it. You know you should've. Chan was right, it was late. The responsible thing to do would be to go home. But that didn't stop you from sitting on his couch waiting for your phone to charge enough to call your ride. The two of you scrolled through YouTube on his TV, chatting about anything that came to mind as you both sipped on some mixed drinks Chan concocted when you first entered the apartment.
It was weird. Without the others, conversation flowed almost naturally between you two.
"You mean to tell me, you've never watched any of your own fan cams?!" You exclaimed. Chan shook his head and laughed shyly.
"No, it felt weird watching close-ups of myself if that makes sense?"
"You really should, they always look phenomenal!"
You grabbed the remote to scroll through the recommended videos to watch. Chan took the opportunity took look you over for the umpteenth time tonight. Here he was just in joggers and an oversized shirt while you sported a cute long-sleeved crop top and tight jeans. He had to grab the pillow next to him to cover up the bulge he was sporting.
You settled on a music video by RenMakesMusic.  The strum of the guitar had Chan bobbing his head along to the beat. The lyrics were a bit dark but meaningful. "This is good," Chan mused. "Turn it up a bit."
You gladly obliged with a smile, pressing the remote's volume button so his subwoofers would have to do some heavy lifting. Music filled the apartment as the two of you watched the video. You didn't realize it initially, but your shoulder pressed against his. You slowly shifted to your right, to create distance not trying to give him the wrong impression, but were surprised when he leaned back into you. It was comforting.
It was right.
"Everything okay?"
Chan's question broke through your mind wandering. You felt your cheeks heat up a bit. "Y-yea, um. Where's the bathroom?"
"Down the hall, to the right."
Chan watched as you made your way to the guest bathroom. He couldn't help but keep his eyes on your backside. Once you disappeared, he leaned further back into the couch and groaned.
What was he doing? Letting you in this late, checking you out when you weren't looking, trying to get any physical contact no matter how little it was. It was stress, it had to be. His schedule has been so hectic lately his body was trying to find relief since his mind was almost running amock. Chan was so lost in thought that he let YouTube play on in the background. Not paying much attention to what was playing.
When you exited the bathroom, you were greeted with bongos and macarenas bouncing through the dorm. Peaking around the corner you spotted Chan leaning against the couch. He had his head back against the rest, his eyes closed. But despite his worn-down posture, he was still tapping his foot to the beat. "Aw, come on--you call that dancing?"
Your voice brought back his focus. His side smile gave you butterflies and you couldn't help but wear your own when he quipped; "Like you know how to dance to this?"
"Alright, Christopher. Get up." You grabbed the remote next to him and turned up the stereo even more. Hopefully, anyone living above or below the apartment wouldn't be able to hear how the bass shook the walls.
His grin widened at the name change. Almost nobody called him that anymore. There was a fine line between 'Chan' and 'Christopher', one that you seemed to be willing to cross.
What else were you willing to do?
Your hand was extended to him as you stood above him from his seat. The gleam in your eye was bright, almost playful. There was this weird feeling in the pit of his stomach. Bubbly and light. How the light casts around your silhouette made him realize why he felt the way he did when his eyes locked on you.
You were a goddess.
"You just gonna sit there? Come on, get up."
He didn't know what you said, but by the way, you grabbed onto his hand and pulled him from his seat, he knew he was in no position to argue.
You were a tough dance instructor. You corrected almost every misstep in Spanish. He couldn't comprehend your scolding, but he'll be damned to admit that at this point, he was doing it on purpose. There was something incredibly hot about being reprimanded in an unknown language.
"Dear all that is mighty," you sighed. "You're too stiff, loosen up a bit. Here, why don't you take the lead instead."
That caused his brain to malfunction a bit. He stuttered like a middle school kid being asked to dance for the first time. Without waiting for a reply, you grab his hands in yours and guide them on your body.  His hold on your waist was firm, but not too tough. He didn't want to scare you away. Not when he was so close to you he could smell your shampoo. Especially, not when you wrapped your arms around his neck and those eyes of yours were peering into his soul as you two stepped to the fast beat.
"Feel how my hips are moving?"
Oh, you bet he does.
Pushing those thoughts away, Chan tried to mimic your movement. "That's better!" You praised it, and it took everything in him not to press his body flush against yours right at that moment. He hated to admit it, but as the next song played, something with a slower tempo, every step you took with him around the living room, he somehow magically ended up closer to you.
This is the part where both of you could blame the alcohol.
You both were too inebriated to notice the fact that your phone was fully charged, that your fingers started to play with the bottom of his hair, or the fact that your faces were so close together. Chan's forehead rested on yours as the playlist finally died down to a softer ballad. YouTube ironically telling you two to slow down. But neither showing signs of listening.
"We...are going down a path you might regret." Chan closed his eyes to help steady his breathing. How were you able to do this earlier today? He felt like his heart was going to combust on the spot.
"That I might regret?" You whispered. Being this close to him felt surreal. You were sure you were about to wake up in your bed feeling very frustrated. "You won't?"
The feel of the pressure of your body was draining all his excitement from his chest to his dick. Another form of pressure was beginning to press against his underwear. A flood of penance sprung as quickly as his blood flowed to his quickening erection. "We just barely met. We don't know each other."
You pull away slightly so you can look up at him.
"Then, get to know me."
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Chan knew this wasn't what you meant. But, it was too late to turn back now.
You were half-naked, a trail of clothes leading to his room.
For every question he asked, an article of your outfit was essentially ripped off you. Every question you answered, you returned the favor.
"Favorite food?" Whoops, there goes that necklace.
"Beef jerky with sticky rice." Goodbye, Chan's shirt!
He kissed you deeply and backed you up towards his bed. A brief pause as you fell into the soft cushions and he stared down at you. Your lips were puffy, chest rising and falling as you were trying to catch your breath. As much as he reveled in the thought of you being a goddess, there was something about bringing down a higher power that made him absolutely feral. Breaking you down bit by bit with every question. 
He climbed on the bed to hover over you, that stupid side smile making another appearance for the night. "That's not exactly a 'food', more of a meal."
"Sorry if I'm--ah. A bit distracted." You close your eyes as he attaches his lips right below your ear. Sucking on your soft skin, not hard enough to leave bruising, but a temporary mark just for his eyes. 
Biting your lower lip, you happily extended your neck a bit to give him more access. Mind all fuzzy and unable to think as he littered your neck with small kisses. Chan gripped your thigh and pulled it up a bit, lifting your hips just enough to hold you close to his pelvis,  kneading your thighs through your tights.
"Need you to focus." He nipped softly at your skin. "How else am I going to learn everything about you?
"Favorite position?" His fingers went under the hem of your tights and helped you shed the last outer part of your outfit. Once it was thrown somewhere across his room, you wrapped the leg he was holding up around his back and used what momentum you could gather to push his back on the bed. His hands instinctively grabbed onto your hips as you straddled him.
Your lips were soft and gentle as you leaned in for a kiss, the complete opposite of the intensity shared just moments before. "Don't care, so long as I'm full."
Chan wasted no time by stripping himself of his joggers and boxers on your behalf. Stifling a moan as best as he could once he felt your clothed core perfectly placed on his growing erection.  Guiding your hips to grind against him, he grinned as you threw your head back and sighed in content. Chan rocked his hips perfectly to the rhythm he set against you, providing the much-needed friction you craved.
You were starting to think he was tanking at dancing salsa on purpose.
"Anything off limits?" You couldn't even register that his hands snuck up to undo your bra clasp. He took a second to appreciate the view. Chan couldn’t stop himself from using his forearms to prop himself up to latch onto one of your nipples. Licking and sucking at anything he could grab. The mewls coming from your mouth sounded like a song he never wanted to end. Your hand caressed the back of his head, pressing him closer. 
“Just--mmm. Just don’t stop even if I say so.”
Leaving your breast with a wet ‘plop’, he stared up at you. You could see the usual gleam in his eyes disappear. They became dark, almost predatory. Chan lifted you off so he could be above you again. He traced your skin from the collarbone down to the hem of your underwear. You arched your back at his touch; “Luckily for you--I like begging.”
Your breath hitched. Surely, he could see the wet stain on your underwear by now.
“Any safe words then?”
Last question.
Chan finger slipped underneath the cloth and played with your folds. The way you squirmed underneath him made him want to ruin you more. The chuckle he let out when you tried to squeeze your thighs together made you feel warm all the way down to your core. Chan was quick to use his body to keep you nice and spread. All for him.
“L-lemon…”
“Sorry, couldn’t hear you.” Chan slipped the tip of his middle finger in you. “Could you speak up a bit?”
“Pendej--mmmphhh” You couldn’t finish your quip. Chan pushed in further until he was knuckle-deep. His lips hovered over yours as he slowly worked in and out of you. You kept arching and writhing as he continued his ministrations, mouth wide open as you let out silent moans.
“Ah, ah--I wanna hear you.” Once he added in a second finger, you couldn't contain yourself. Moans were spilling out of you like a pornstar. Even when he kissed you, there was nothing to stop the volume you were outputting. “Good job, baby.”
“Oh?” He chuckled as he felt your walls clamp down on him. “Did you like that?”
You couldn't speak as he kept pressing into you, wiggling his fingers against your walls. “C-chan…please…”
“Sorry, what was that?” He teased as he kissed around your collarbone.
“Chan…”
The bastard kept pretending not to hear you. As if he couldn't feel you practically leaking around his fingers and clenching around him like there was no tomorrow. 
You finally had enough.
Grabbing ahold of his face with one hand, you forced him to look at you. His cheeks smashed between your fingers. “Christopher, I swear to God--if you don't fuck me right now I'm taking over.”
Ah, so you did like to be in charge.
With a grin, he gladly ripped off your panties. He pulled away just a bit, taking in your appearance. Wanting to embed it into his brain for any future sessions he might have with himself later on.
He knew he should've grabbed a condom, but the alcohol was still flowing through him and he couldn’t stop himself as he slowly pushed into you. You tried finding words; how big he felt, how full he made you, but all that could come out were whimpers as he groaned and leaned in for another kiss to ease any pain you felt.
The two of you grind against one another. Chan never fully pulled out, keeping himself nice and snug in your warmth. Stretching you out, oh so sweetly.
Chan wasted no time in picking up his thrust as you tapped his shoulder, indicating that he was okay to move. You squeaked as he hooked your knees on his shoulders and leaned down to essentially bend you in half. He was hitting a spot you never felt before; not with previous boyfriends and definitely not with your own toys at home.
“So fucking tight…” Chan hissed as his pace sped up to the point he was jackhammering into you. His lips found their way back to your neck and kept mumbling about how you felt around him. So tight, so warm, just right. His teeth nipped your ear lobe, desperate to grab onto something but knowing he couldn’t mark you up too much. “Is this good, baby? Need it harder, faster?”
When you didn’t respond to him, he slowed down a bit and leaned back to stare down at you. His cock twitched when he realized what was happening.
You laid on the bed; eyes glazed over, mouth wide open, cheeks completely flushed. You knew he was asking you a question in Korean, but the words weren’t forming in your head like they usually do. “Aw,” Chan laughed. “Does it feel that good that you forgot Korean?”
Chan let up on the pressure so his hand can snake its way to your lips. You instantly latch on to his fingers and suck. Your tongue brushes around his tips, tasting the leftover residue of yourself from earlier. Your knees unhook from his shoulder and fall on either side of his waist. A whimper leaves you as he removes his fingers from your mouth and travels down to rub your clit. Still keeping his thrust with his brutal pace.
“Ahhh…wait…” You squirmed and your hand went to grab his wrist. Chan noticed how you didn’t pull his hand away despite your pleas. “Chan, p-please--too much.”
He kept using your body. Chan could feel you clamping down around his length. “Sorry,” he breathed out as he felt the pressure in his balls rising. “You’re just, hmmmph, too perfect.”
That’s what did it for you. The fact that he listened to what you mentioned earlier, and his talk. The crash of pleasure that overcame you was intense. Chan shuddered as he felt your wave around him. “Fuck, fuck fuck,” you came with a cry. Your arms wrapped around his neck, trying to ground yourself in any way that you could. You were loud. Nothing could stop the curses that flowed out of you as you held him close against you. Chan wasn’t far behind; “Oh, I-I’m gonna--”
He pulled out and stroked his cock rapidly around his head, painting your stomach with his warm cum. Of all the art museums he visited around the world--this was by far his favorite piece of work.
The room was filled with both of your heavy pants as he laid in your arms. Once he was able to catch his breath, Chan pulled away from your embrace placing the gentlest kiss on your lips. Humming as you kissed him back. He tried to get up, but you were quick to stop him.
“Don’t go…” You pouted. Part of you knew this would be a one-time thing, but another part never wanted this to end. Chan smiled down at you and gave your cheek a quick peck.
“I’m just grabbing a towel to clean you off.”
As he walked off to the bathroom you stared down at the mess on your abdomen. The remnants of the best sex of your life were starting to cake on your skin. It took everything in you to not scoop some up and taste him in your mouth. When Chan returned with a wet cloth, he cleaned you up before plopping onto the bed beside you.
Once you caught your breath, reality set in.
Here you were, all fucked out with a colleague in the same industry. Everything told you to leave. It wasn’t like the two of you were in a relationship. It was a rash decision based on a lot of alcohol and dancing. You started to get up, but Chan was quick to wrap his hand in yours.
“You…you don’t have to go…” Chan shifted to lay on his side and stared down to not meet your eyes. Acting all shy as if he didn’t fuck the lights out of you just moments before. Your heart melted at the sight.
Slinking back into bed, his arms wrapped around you and pulled you into his chest. His cheek pressed against the top of your forehead. You could feel his heartbeat against you and closed your eyes.
“You know,” you sighed. “This was something I definitely didn’t regret.”
“Me ‘neither.”
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As the morning rolled around you woke up to Chan still wrapped around you. His soft snores made you smile. There was something surreal about seeing him so at peace that made your heart flutter. Placing a small kiss on his cheek, Chan shifted slightly and groaned as he stretched a bit.
“Mornin’,” He grumbled but held a smile as soon as his eyes landed on you. Chan wasted no time in pulling you into a kiss. His hands sneaking towards your ass to knead your flesh. His excitement is present against your thigh.
"Somebody's eager," You giggle as he pressed closer to you. Chan smirked as he gently rubbed his morning wood against you.
"You can say that."
"Unfortunately--"
Chan grumbled and hid his face in the crook of your neck. "No, don't say that."
"I was just going to say, that I need some water first." It was true. After all the drinks last night, your head was pounding like never before.
"Okay," Chan smiled and got up from bed to put a pair of boxers on. "Stay put, I'll grab you something to eat too."
Minutes passed as you waited in bed. Surprise overtook you as you heard a pan sizzling and the welcoming smell of home-cooking started to flood the dorm. Dawning one of his shirts, you made your way to the kitchen. Chan's back was to you as he manned the stove. You could see how his back rippled with every movement he made.
You couldn't see it, but a smile crept on Chan's face as he felt you wrap your arms around his midriff. "I thought I told you to stay put?"
"I'm not one for taking orders." You laugh as you hook your chin on his shoulder to peer over him. "Besides," Chan stiffened a bit as he felt your lips hover over his ear. "There's something sexy about a man cooking."
"Oh?" He quickly turned off the stove and turned around to face you. Your arms wrap around his neck as he leaned down closer to your face. "And what about your water?"
It was a frenzy of passion as your lips locked with his yet again. Both of you eager to relive last night in the light of sobriety. "Water can wait," you whisper in between kisses.
Chan easily lifted you, placing you on an open counter. Your legs spread to allow him access to be closer to you. The both of you started to mold into one another as the intensity grows. "I should cook for you more often," He grins as he breaks away from the kiss to catch his breath. He lifted his shirt on you slightly so your cunt was exposed.
"Promise?" You teased as he lowered himself down slightly to bring his lips level to your core. Chan enjoyed the way your head leaned back slightly as you felt his hot breath against you.
"Promise."
The both of you were so entranced with what was about to happen, that you didn't hear the door opening. Only the shrilly scream that bounced around the dorm broke you two apart.
You instantly jumped down from the counter as Chan stood upright, finding protection from behind him. Chan tried using his body to shield your half-naked body from the view of a very frightened Felix.
Not that he really needed too.
The younger member held both hands over his eyes. Groceries bags around him, spilling its contents around the floor.
"Felix?" Chan stuttered as he grabbed a kitchen rag to cover up his erection. "W-what are you doing here?"
Chan gestured for you to run back to the room as Felix was still covering his eyes. You had no hesitation, wanting to escape from the embarrassment. AKA your own personal hell.
"I didn't want you eating alone... I was gonna make breakfast."
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Author's Note: Here it is! Please let me know what you think. I'm also open to requests, I really want to get back into writing and interacting more on here. If you'd like to be added to my taglist please interact with this post (linked). Bye~
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3K notes · View notes
un-lawliet · 10 months
Note
WHAT IF teen!Gojo and teen!reader are best friends teetering on the edge of lovers but they get into a petty little argument and start ignoring each other right???? so reader goes on a date with someone else to be petty and Gojo internally freaks out. So, him and his friends get in disguises as Gojo tries to sabotage the date without being noticed but instead he accidentally helps the other guy look great and impressive every time💀
Geto, shoko, and Nanami don’t help Satoru. They just watch and laugh😭 good fluffy ending though pls
THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST !!!!! i loved this idea so so much- i kinda tweaked the request slightly but i hope this is ok <3 i love you and thank you for your patience !
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“Normal”
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- in which you’re on a date with someone that isn’t Gojo.
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“Does this count as stalking?”
It absolutely did count as stalking.
Gojo, Shoko, Nanami and Geto were currently huddled in a dimly lit booth hunkering down as to not be seen by you…or your pompous looking date sat opposite you.
“It’s not stalking.” Gojo splutters, glaring at Geto through the top of his sunglasses, “It’s just..just-”
“You tracking Y/N down and making us watch her on a date.” Shoko muses, rolling a cigarette between her fingers, reaching for her lighter.
“Exactly!”
Nanami groans, his head falling backwards, hair falling over the curve of his eyebrows, hiding his face slightly.
Shaking his head, a small grin dances across Geto’s calm face, watching as Gojo pouts and glares at your table, eyes completely trained on your face.
“‘S’not even that good looking, she just has a thing for guys that flatter her.” He grumbles under his breath, flicking the fancy wall he leaned on.
“Think most girls enjoy feelin’ pretty Gojo.” Shoko replies, hand still feeling around in her pocket, “Oh fuck sakes, I’ve lost my lighter…Hey- Geto, you wouldn’t happen to have a spare one on ya?”
Geto nodded, tossing her a purple lighter from across the table, smiling gently as she thanked him.
“You shouldn’t smoke inside.” Nanami mutters, now staring down at the menu in-front of him, finger tracing along the prices in thought, seeming to pause on the brownie section.
“No one can see, we’re fine.” She sighs, taking a drag and blowing it towards Gojo, grinning as he dramatically clutches his chest, gasping for air.
“What’s the point of us even being here Gojo.” Nanami huffs, side eyeing the bakery stand parallel to their table.
“Because, I need to show her that this..this loser is nothing compared to me!”
“I don’t know Satoru.” Geto muses, taking a sip of his camomile, “Y/N seems pretty into him.”
“Suguru!” Gojo gasps in horror, betrayal dripping from his voice and on to the curve of his disgusted face.
Shoko wiggles her eyebrows teasingly, inhaling before continuing. “He has a point Gojo, I mean look, you ever see her smile like that?”
Gojo whips his head around to stare at you, and Shoko covers her mouth to hide a poorly restrained giggle, sharing a glance with Geto.
“I make her smile like that- She smiles like that with me!!” He whines, and Nanami rolls his eyes.
A waitress smashes a glass from behind the café’s counter, you jump slightly in your seat and turn to look over at the sound, you don’t notice the group of strange looking teenagers ducking down at your movement, concealing themselves poorly in their seats.
Your date laughs at you, you blush and turn back to him bashfully, excusing yourself for being so on edge.
Gojo glares.
“So what’s the plan then Gojo.” Nanami drawls, resting his face on his palm.
“Yes! The plan!” Gojo splutters, looking away from your pretty, pretty face to look at the three of them.
He hesitates and Shoko groans.
“You do have a plan don’t you?”
“Of course I do!..So, the plan..the plan um, well-”
“He has no plan.” Geto interrupts.
“Jesus Christ Gojo.”
“Does that mean I can leave?”
“Shut up!” Gojo exclaims, “I’m thinking give me a second would ya?”
“Nanami if your leaving I’m coming with you.”
“Wanna go now Shoko?”
“Guys!”
Gojo slumps forward in his chair, his face resting on the table as he whines.
Geto rests a hand on his back and chuckles, shaking his head at the two other sorcerers.
“It’s ok Satoru, we can all figure something out ‘kay?”
“Yea?” Gojo replies, his voice muffled by the table.
“Yea.”
Instantly, Gojo springs up, his eyes as wide as his smile.
“Ok let’s brainstorm.” Geto suggest, his voice like honey as he removes his hand from Gojo’s back and reaches back to his tea.
“What if we spill tea over him!” Gojo gasped, pointing towards the cup in Geto’s hand, a sharp look crossing his face.
“Stupid. Y/N would see us.” Shoko grumbles.
“No- See Shoko, the point of a brain storming session means we make suggestions and listen without judgement.” Gojo argues, crossing his arms.
“Yea but your idea was stupid.” Nanami concludes, watching as Shoko nods.
“You suggest something then Nanamin!”
“I’m suggesting nothing, this whole idea is foolish.”
“OoOoh “Foolish” is it?”
“I’m leaving.”
Nanami stands up reaching for his bag, scowling at Gojo.
“Hey, hey Nanami c’mon ignore him he’s just..” Geto pauses with a quick regard to Gojo, “He’s just Satoru.”
“An idiot.” Shoko chimes.
“Yes, an idiot.”
Nanami sighs as he sits down, placing his brown bag back at his feet reluctantly ignoring Gojo’s grin.
“…What if we trip up the waitress as she’s bringing them their food.” Shoko suggests, twirling a piece of hair around her finger.
“That could work!”
“No, Satoru, that just causes trouble to the waiting staff.”
“And?”
Geto rolls his eyes, “We don’t need to cause anyone any trouble just because you’re too afraid to just ask Y/N out.”
“I am not afraid!” Gojo moans, putting his face in his hands.
“Uh huh, that’s why you fell out with her when she told you about the date.” Shoko laughs, wiping off ash from her arm.
“What was I supposed to do?” Gojo queries, frowning.
“Talk to her?” Nanami deadpans, “Like a normal person.”
“Our Gojo isn’t normal though.” Shoko winks, nudging an unamused Nanami.
“Focus guys.” Geto says, clapping his hands twice to draw attention.
Your sweet laugh echoes through the cafe, and Gojo pouts, shoulders slumping.
You were supposed to be sitting opposite him laughing.
It was supposed to be his food with which you shared.
And yet one petty argument about some random guy you had met in returning from your last mission asking you out, had ruined everything.
The shared glances between you and Gojo, how you leaned on his shoulder when you slept in classes, the way he would always keep an eye on your cursed energy when joining you in battle.
All those little moments had dissolved in the bitter moments after you informed him of your date, a small smile dancing in your eyes.
“He said I was pretty Toru’” You had said, your eyes wide, and Gojo wanted to cover the love sick gleam glistening in your eyes with his hand.
“I always think your pretty.” He mumbled, watching you cock your head in confusion.
“What was that?” You questioned, leaning towards him slightly, trying to recall his quiet words.
“Nothin’.” His curt response didn’t phase you as you moved backwards, a charming skip in your step.
“Think he sounds stupid.” Gojo was never good at expressing his true feelings, and in that moment, Gojo’s sheer panic over you leaving him overpowered his aloofness.
“You think someone thinking I’m pretty is stupid?” Your shoulders fell, and you turn to him, a small lour crossing your face.
“What? No? That’s not what I-”
“It what’s you said though Toru’” You sighed, and Gojo cursed at himself for the glimmer of insecurity that appeared to vex you in that moment.
“It’s just- Well he’s just stupid.”
“So you are calling him stupid for telling me I’m pretty.”
“No! He’s stupid! Not his words!”
“That’s the same thing Gojo!”
“Is not!”
“Is too!”
And now Gojo’s watching as Geto summons one of his smallest and weakest curses to push your stupid dates chair over, sunglasses off and held in his fist.
“Oh so we’re actually going with this plan? I wasn’t imagining it?” Shoko muses, stealing a forkful of Nanami’s brownie.
“Nobody else had any better ideas.” Gojo silenced, waving a hand in her direction, practically clamouring on top of Geto to watch.
“Satoru watch it, I can’t see where my curse is going with you on me.” Geto scolds, brushing the white haired man off.
“I can’t believe this is happening.” Nanami’s disinterest oozes out from his voice, nudging his plate over to Shoko who smiles brightly at his offer.
Geto flexes his hand, ensuring that the curse went unnoticed by you, it ducked under a table and weaved between chair legs.
“Make sure Y/N doesn’t see it!” Gojo panics, his hand covering his mouth.
Geto pauses, and looks over his shoulder towards Gojo, eyebrow raised.
“…Sit down Satoru.”
And Gojo immediately drops, hands on his legs.
The curse bobbles over to under your dates chair, and Geto smiles, before releasing his hold.
.
.
.
The sound of your dates chair toppling over boomed through the cafe, and with a swift flick of his finger, the curse dissapears, and all four of the sorcerer’s immediately drop their heads.
“Oh my God? Are you ok?!” Your concerned voice follows, and you stand up instantly, rushing towards your date, who grins at you from the floor.
“Oops, must have slipped.” He smiles, accepting your hand in helping in up, wiping the memory of his fall off of his jeans. “At least I have a pretty lady to help me in my moment of weakness.”
You giggle, and push his shoulder, “Oh shush you tease.” Bending over to pick up his chair.
“Oh no don’t worry I got it.” Your date winks, helping you lift the chair.
“How??!?!” Gojo groans, watching you swoon, “What is happening?”
“Man.. She must really like him eh?” Shoko offers, sharing a cheeky smile with Geto.
“Maybe it’s hopeless.” Nanami chimes in, “Do you want to finish this?” He asks Shoko, gesturing to the half eaten brownie.
“Actually?”
“Yea go on, you seem to be enjoying it.”
“Maybe.” Geto cuts in, “Maybe we should just leave them be? Let it fizzle out naturally?”
“What if there is no naturally Suguru.” Gojo mopes, kicking the leg of the table.
“Gojo it’s obvious she likes you, and it’s obvious you’re both smitten.” Shoko says, her voice muffled and she finishes Nanami’s brownie.
“..You think?”
“Everyone thinks.” Nanami replies, “Haibara thought you two were dating when we first joined the school.”
“How is Haibara by the way?” Geto questioned, “Why didn’t he join us?”
“Not sure, he said something about needing more sleep before his first solo mission.”
“Isn’t that next week?” Shoko adds.
“He likes his sleep.”
“Come on guys! Focus!!” Gojo exclaims. “I’m in a dire situation here!!”
“A dire situation that could be solved with a conversation, Gojo.” Nanami rolls his eyes.
“Try the curse again Suguru.”
“Satoru it didn’t work once, it probably won’t work a second time.”
“Ugh.” Gojo slumps back, a sigh escaping his lips. “If you’re all so sure Y/N likes me, then why is she with that loser right now?”
“She probably got tired waiting for you to make a move Gojo.” Shoko replies.
“Yea the “will they, won’t they” becomes tiresome after a while.” Geto agrees, pushing his empty cup towards the middle of the table.
“Ah!” Shoko says pointing over at you.
“They’re leaving Gojo.” Nanami affirms, joining Shoko in pointing.
“What?!?” Gojo gapes, “No!”
Geto laughs, shoving Gojo to his feet, watching you leave the cafe. “Go get her Satoru.”
“But how?” Gojo moans.
“Just go!” They all exclaim, and Gojo pauses for a split second before he’s bounding towards the door.
By the time he’s outside, you’re waving goodbye to your date, promising to call him as he walks the other way.
You look happy he thinks, and suddenly feels very out of place.
Gojo’s begins to turn to go back into the cafe, admitting defeat, when he hears your voice behind him.
“Gojo?” You gasp, disbelief permeating from your voice. And Gojo freezes, turning around awkwardly to face you.
“Hi.” Gojo replied, scuffing his shoes against the ground as he approaches you, hands in his pockets attempting to appear cool.
You look at him, your mouth slightly agape as you fiddle with the sleeve of your jumper, processing his appearance.
“You followed me to my date?” You ask accusingly, glancing around.
“He didn’t offer to take you home?” Gojo chooses to ignore you, refusing to acknowledge the implication of your words.
“I told him I could go back by myself.”
“Some guy.”
“Satoru.” You pause, lifting a hand to stop him, “Why are you here?”
A car drives past the pair of you, it’s headlights cast shadows across his perfect face and your hold yourself back from staring.
He stalls, looking at you for a moment. “C’mere, I’ll walk you home.”
“Satoru.”
You’re tired of his deflections, for once you just want to talk.
You both stare at each-other, silence decorating the air between you.
And Gojo shakes his head, stepping backwards and looking away.
“You look good.” He mutters.
“Good?”
“Pretty alright? You look pretty, he was right.”
“My date?”
Gojo’s sunglasses fall down the bridge of his nose slightly as he leans down to look at you.
“Who else?” He muses.
You don’t understand, your heart fluttering pathetically in your chest as you prove further.
“Why are you telling me this now?” You ask, your voice light, scarce of hope.
“Because.” Gojo hesitates, hating how unsure he sounds in this moment. “Because you are.”
You step towards him, it’s a slow movement and Gojo watches you almost cautiously.
“It took me going on a date with someone else for you to finally say something?” You tease, your hands shaking despite the confidence in your words.
“Would have said something without him, y’know?”
“..Really?” Your eyes widen, a tiny grin crossing your face.
Gojo nods, and you take another step and hug him, burying your face in the warmth of his chest.
And Gojo’s smile almost hurts his cheeks as he wraps his arms around your figure, pulling you in closer.
“You’re an idiot.” You mumble, looking up at him.
“But you like me.” He replies, cockily grinning down at you, blue eyes sparkling.
“Yea, I do.” You whisper, clinging to him, moving your head backdown to face his chest, face burning with your confession.
A small kiss is placed on the top of your head and you hold back a giddy laugh, pulling away from his embrace completely.
“So…Does that mean you’ll let me take you out?” Gojo questions, taking your hand and pulling you gently along to walk with him.
“Hmm I don’t know..Are you asking?” Your head leans on his arm, grabbing his arm as you walk.
“I would take you somewhere much better than that shitty cafe.”
And you’re laughing, “You love that cafe Toru.”
And he laughs with you, a long arm circling around your shoulders, pulling you impossibly closer to him.
And Geto, Shoko and Nanami watch from the window of the cafe, shaking their heads.
“Idiots.” Shoko says.
“Completely.” Nanami agrees.
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Masterlist <3
Feel free to leave a request !
A/N : HELLLLLOOOO PEOPLE !! ABBY’S BACK !!! thank you for the request sweets this is literally one of my favourite concepts ever I cannot cope!!!! I love teenage Gojo so much :( BUT ALSO Shoko <333333 — i hope everyone is happy and healthy, i finished this at 2am and i have school tmrw pls kill me rn i hope a car hits me when i walk in, genuinley this no longer a joke.
LOVE YOU
3K notes · View notes
bpsmuts · 3 months
Text
Day in the Office - Jennie and Rose
Jennie x Rose x Male Reader
Words: 1.697
Summary: You were in the recording studio with your two best friends Jennie and Rose. Bored, Jennie suggests you three play a game of "Never have I ever".
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Jennie, Rose, Y/N
"Didn't you say, you wanted to be productive today Jen?" You ask your friend, who had just suggested to play Never have I ever.
Jennie sits over on the couch, with her feet up on the table "Well yeah, but were all have writer's block right now" she responds "And come on, we don't get to spend THAT much time together, plus we've already gotten good progress today" she pouts
"I wouldn't mind playing for a bit, as long as we continue with out actual work later" Rose chimes in from the desk. "You're not scared, are you Y/N?" the kiwi girl mocks you a little.
"What? No! I'm not scared, I just thought you two wanted to be productive, but fuck it, lets play then!" You challenge them as you get up from the chair next to rose and sit down next to Jennie "Who's starting?" You ask into the room
"I'll start" Jennie decides "Rosie, get over here" she orders Rose, who rolls over to the table. All of you put your hand up and Jennie begins the game.
"Never have I everrrr" Jennie thinks for a moment "Uhhh.. gotten a speeding ticket" You and Rose both put a finger down "You have never gotten a speeding ticket Jen?" Rose asks surprised "Of course she hasn't, she is being driven everywhere" You add, taking a shot at Jennie.
"I have driven before..." Jennie tries to defend herself "Okay, my turn" Rose continues "Never have I ever kissed a stranger" to which Jennie and yourself put down a finger "Okay, you two are teaming up on me" You exclaim
"How are we teaming up on you?" Jennie asks while laughing and looking over to Rose "You just are" You retort "Probably cause I wanted to work instead of goof around" I fake your anger "We are not goofing around, were taking a break. Just play your turn" Jennie responds
"Okay. Never have I ever sucked a dick" You grin as both girls put down a finger in shock "Okay, that's unfair" Rosie yells "What?! I'm just evening out the playing field here" you respond to her.
"Okay, next one counts double?" Jennie suggests to the group "Bring it Miss Kim" Rose replies "Never have I ever had sex" Jennie surprised the group as everyone puts down a finger "Now everyone is down to the last one" she smirks
"What happens to the loser?" Rose asks Jennie "Hmmm" she thinks for a bit "How about, the loser has to take their shirt off?" Jennie suggests into the room "Okay Jennie, I don't know if this is very professional" You try and veto the decision but get interrupted by Rose "Done!"
"Okay wait wait wait" You halt the game "This is totally unfair, since its Rose's turn now" You try your hardest to get the rule changed, with no luck "But Jennie could also lose Y/N" Rose remarks "I mean we can change it, if you want to chicken out Y/N" Jennie offers
"No No. Lets do it this way" You accept giving Rose the look to continue the game "Okay. Let me think here" Rose takes a thinker pose, as if she is solving a complex math problem "Okay, Never have I ever had sex with a woman" the kiwi girl grins widely, knowing you lost
You accept defeat and put down your last finger before realizing you were the only person to take one down "Now wait a minute, are you telling me both of you haven't done it with a girl?" You ask visibly confused "Not even with each other like once?" You add
"Ewww" both girls go in unison "Get your head out of the gutter Y/N" Jennie responds "Yeah we have barely even seen each other naked" Rose adds to Jennie's comment "He is probably just upset that he lost" Jennie chuckles to Rose
Still not believe them, you take your punishment as a man and take off your shirt, revealing a muscular physique with a six pack coming through quite visibly. As the room falls silent you see the two girls oogling at your upper body, with Jennie being able to catch herself quite fast.
"Its rude to stare Rosie" You mock Rose, who is still staring at your six pack "Let her be. Six Packs are her thing" Jennie tells you from the side "JENNIE" Rose retorts in embarrassment
"Do you want to touch it?" You offer Rose, who's embarrassment you find cute "Can I actually?" she replies, thinking you are messing with her "If its your thing" You chuckle. Rose gives you a look before getting off her chair and kneeling in front of you, carefully moving her fingers across your six pack
After a bit she looks up at you and quietly asks "C-Can I lick it?" with a big smile on her face "Umm.. I mean yeah, but you have to take your shirt off then too" You negotiate with the sweet kiwi girl
"I'll do you one better then" Rose giggles as she takes off her shirt, revealing her small breasts "Too small for a bra" She giggles as she shows off her chest "Oh wow Rosie, they look amazing" You respond before slowly moving a hand towards her chest, cupping a breast carefully
"Thanks" she responds before slowly licking over your six pack, moving further down towards your crotch. Right as she goes to unbuckle your belt Jennie interrupts the moment "Umm guys... Im still here"
Both you and Rose look over to Jennie, who is just sitting there. Your hand still cupping one of Rosie's breasts and her hand in the middle of unbuckling your belt, Jennie asks "Put a finger down, if you're about to have a threesome?"
Both you and Rose put up your hands before taking one finger down, chuckling. Jennie then moves closer to you and the two of you kiss, as Rose unbuckles your belt. You move your hips upward so Rose can pull down your pants. "Ooohh didn't know you were packing like this Y/N" Rose exclaims in awe as she sees your dick for the first time
"Save some for me Rosie" Jennie tells her as she also removes her shirt, showing off a white lacy bra. As Rose starts to slowly take in your length, your hand wanders from her breasts to Jennie's, cupping both of them as you two kiss.
You cant help but moan, as Rose continues to suck your dick. "Your mouth feels so good Rosie" you encourage the cute girl. Meanwhile Jennie takes off the rest of her clothes, not just revealing her boobs, but also that she wasn't wearing panties.
"What is it with you two and only wearing half a set of underwear" You chuckle. "Rosie doesn't need a bra and well.. I'm just a slut" Jennie answers, pressing her lips onto yours once again.
After a while Jennie breaks the kiss "Okay, my turn" she says to Rose, climbing down from the sofa as Rosie makes way between your legs. "Can I sit on your face Y/N?" Rose asks cutely before being interrupted by Jennie "I have a way better idea" she exclaims
"Y/N! Lay down on the sofa. Then Rosie can ride your face, while I ride you" Jennie suggests "And we can make out" Rose adds, while all three of you get in position.
As Rose climbs onto your face, burying it in her vagina, you can feel Jennie slowly slide down on your dick. You can feel the depth of Jennie's pussy as you grab Rose's ass to make sure the cute kiwi girl doesn't actually suffocate you.
Shortly after, the room is filled with smacking from the lips of Jennie and Rose, as they made out and the smacking of Jennie's pussy lips on your crotch as well as muffled moans from all three of you.
"Yes Y/N, just like that" Rose moans as she breaks her kiss with Jennie before going on to suck her nipples. "You feel so good inside me Y/N" Jennie compliments your dick.
"I'm close, can we switch Jen?" Rose asks in between heavy moans "Just one second baby" Jennie replies as she can feel herself reaching her climax. "JENNIEEE" Rose moans cutely, trying her best to hold her orgasm
Not shortly after that, you can feel Jennie's walls tighten as the Korean moans loudly, before getting off your dick, making space for Chaeyoung. Getting up from your face, you can finally take deep breaths again.
You see Jennie sitting on the floor next to you "That was amazing Y/N" she compliments as you Rose lowers herself onto your dick. You can feel the tight walls of Rose, as she starts to bounce up and down.
Jennie moves over to suck on Rose's nipples, earning even louder moans from her "Oh my god I'm gonna cum I'm gonna cum Y/N!" Rose moans loudly as she also reaches climax.
After she came, Rose also got off and kneeled on the floor next to Jennie. With both girls looking at you, you knew exactly what they wanted. You stood up and positioned yourself in front of them, starting to stroke your dick.
Jennie and Rose look up at you "Cum on us Y/N, Cum on our pretty faces" Jennie encourages you "Please give us all of your cum Y/N" Rose joins in.
You moan as you start to shoot rope after rope on their faces, trying to give both of them an equal amount of your hot cum. After you're done, you look down to two satisfied girls covered in your cum.
"Now for the best part" Rose says, before turning to Jennie and planting some kisses on her mouth. You sit down and watch the girls make out for a bit. "This was so much fun" You exclaim after gathering your breath.
"Definitely" Jennie replies, as she swipes your cum from her cheek into her mouth and swallows it. "Im gonna get us something to clean ourselves up with" Rose says, getting up and walking out of the room.
Author's Note: If you've made it this far, thank you <3
If you want to leave feedback, please either comment or DM me!
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boyfhee · 7 months
Text
이희승 、PRETTY GIRL
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featuring ⋆ bsf!heeseung, hints at friends with benefits
warnings ⋆ slightly suggestive, use of endearments, profanities, jealously on heeseung's side, toxic undertones? i'm not too sure on this one ( 0.9k )
notes ⋆ something has been so so wrong with me recently i can't come up with anything that doesn't involve making out
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“hee, how do i look?” 
heeseung is sprawled on your couch, scrolling through his phone when he looks up at you, raising an eyebrow. you’re waiting for his response and he’s taking his time— eyeing you up and down, the way that pretty dress hugs your body. you’ve even done your makeup, flaunting that lip tint you had bought recently, that makes your lips ten times more kissable. you never dressed like this for him.
he sighs, putting his phone aside, and sits up straight, not a single emotion on his face. “are you going to the library to study or on a date?”
“ah, did i over do it?” and you’re asking in the cutest and quietest voice, looking down at your outfit and oh how much he wants to tell you how gorgeous you look. 
but you aren’t all dolled up for him. it’s for your project partner— that asshole you have also been studying with for finals for over a week now. and it’s ridiculous how he— or anyone of those losers around you think they stand a chance, when you end up in his arms every night, at the end of all. 
“no,” yes, he wanted to say. “not at all,” so pretty for someone who’s not me.
he gets up from the couch and makes his way to you— you look prettier up close. heeseung is aware of it. he wants it to be his little secret, who even does your study guy or whatever thinks he is? heeseung takes your hands and pulls you closer, just looking at you, admiring you. maybe he should keep his pretty little best friend all to himself.
and you don’t even mind since you’re used to this. the closeness, subtle touches, holding hands, comfort, advice— it’s what best friends are for. “but you said i look like i’m going on a date.” 
he chuckles at your cute reaction, the pout, the slight frown. how cute. it’s adorable how you always take his words seriously, he’s the one person you can rely on, who you trust blindly. sometimes, heeseung feels bad for having feelings for you. would you even care if he confessed? or would you just cut him off? he’s your precious best friend after all, who you’ve known since you two were toddlers. 
“i meant to say that you look too pretty,” is he even allowed to feel this way?
you laugh softly at his words, a bit flustered at his words even though he has complimented you a thousand times. “well, i’ll get going then, ‘seung,”
truthfully, it’s also your fault. 
those smiles and giggles, your gaze that searches for him in a crowded room. you never forget to invite him to a group hangout, it’s one benefit of being friends with your friends. those nicknames you call him and only him. he’s the one you run to when you have problems. you live in his apartment more than your dorm— it’s your fault for making him feel all this. for making him like this.
you try to pull your hand back to leave, but instead he wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer, pressing himself against you. this is wrong, you know, he knows. too bad, it’s not the first time. worse, he doesn’t care. 
“hee—” you gasp in surprise, but your words end up coming out as a sigh once he presses his lips against your neck. he can feel your hands on his shoulders, trying to push him away and the swift motion in which they instinctively wrap around him. and you do realise it’s your fault. you always end up giving in anyway. it’s a bad, vicious habit— he pulls, you push, and then give in, and the way you react to things he does drives him insane.
sure, your project partner could wait for a while. he doesn’t deserve you anyway. 
“you’re so pretty, angel,” he whispers next to your ear, giving it a soft nibble before pulling back and looking at you with those enchanting eyes and a smile that sends your heart into a whirlwind. he calls you angel like it’s your name, and he whispers compliments ever so softly and sweetly. it’s what you had asked him for— to tell you how you look, and heeseung is good at doing that. he has got your back. “so gorgeous,”
it’s what best friends are for. 
the next thing your mind registers is his sweet lips on yours, the taste of cherries and vanilla from the shortcakes you two had earlier lingering on your tongue, and then your mind goes blank. you’re pulling him closer, he’s busy savouring your taste, taking in your every breath, every little sound you make as he kisses you so well.
heeseung bets that guy you’re so excited to spend time with can’t even make you feel half of what you’re feeling. you’re always going to end up coming back to him for more. after all, no one knows what you want better than heeseung.
the sound of your phone ringing snaps him out of his thoughts. he looks at your slightly red lips as you reach out for your phone, but heeseung beats you to it. he grabs your phone and grins when he sees the caller ID— it’s your study buddy— hands caressing your cheeks as he answers with a smirk. “sorry, my girl will be a bit late today. hope you don’t mind,”
he hangs up, phone somewhere around, and his lips are back on yours again.
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xqueen-of-disasterx · 7 months
Note
Hey there could I request G!P professor!nat x shy!quiet!reader where reader goes to the school dance alone and feels like a loser for not having the balls to talk or join in with other people but then nat decides to keep her company because she can’t stand seeing her favorite student all pathetic just standing there like a lost puppy and then they sneak off to do “other” stuff
Favourite
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Paring: fem!reader x prof!Nat
Warnings: SMUT, amab!Nat, top!Nat, bottom!reader, age gap (legal), taboo relationship, soft sex, p in v, brief oral, soft!Nat, virgin!reader, gentlewoman!Nat
!Disclaimer English is not my first language so please excuse any grammar or spelling errors. This story is completely fictional. I do not own these characters!
A/N: I’m not dead yet and more active noe
I had always thought in college things would change for girls like me, the quiet ones, with a few friends, who you would only talk to to copy their homework. However it stayed that way or at least for me. I had found my small group of friends but I was far from well socialised in my college. But I wasn’t complaining about it either after all it left more time to study.
Most of the lessons I attended were boring except for one: Russians literature with Professors Romanoff, a tall, athletic woman, with red hair and the greenest eyes you had ever seen. You didn’t mind her talking for hours about poems and novels and what we were supposed to think of them. However you couldn’t care less about the words leaving her mouth when you’re eyes were only fixated on her lips.
Eventually more of the semester passed and soon it was time for the annual ball. Because of your low social status you didn’t even try to find a date opting on going alone instead, it wouldn’t be that bad right?
Once there you where alone, the few friends which you had didn’t bother to attend so you stood alone at the side of the large room your eyes fixated on the ground. You should just go, you thought to yourself. “Good evening, Y/N” you heard the familiar husky voice next to you. You looked up only to be greeted by your smirking professor. She looked gorgeous having picked out a matching suit to her eyes.
“Hi, Ms. Romanoff” she leaned against the wall next to me her eyes darting over my smaller body. “Where’s your date?” “I don’t have one” I answered truthfully, her expression stayed the same it was hard to read her. “And you’re friends?” I sighed she knew the answer to that already. “They didn’t attend.” She chuckled licking her lips like a predator who just found it’s helpless prey. “Poor girl, all alone and needs her professor to keep her company”
I let out a small laugh which sounded incredibly fake. Her words made my cheeks heat and I didn’t even know why. “Could be worse” I looked up in her eyes again “You’re a very pleasant conversation partner” “Am I?” She chuckled “That means a lot to me, hearing my favorite student say something like that” “I’m your favorite?” you stammered out “Trust me bunny a girl like you” Her hand trailed to my hip “You hardly get something like that every ten years. I’m very happy to have you”
Her words made my heart flutter and my head turn. I was special, Romanoff’s girl. “Do you mean that?” My voice was still a bit shaky. “Of course I do. We should go somewhere more private” I nodded her hand intertwined with mine she pulled me with her through the masses into the parking lot. Once seated in her expensive looking her hand never left my thigh before she started the car she leaned over to me our lips inches apart I tried to lean forward but her hands pushed my shoulder back against the car seat.
“Don’t do this to make me happy” She paused her eyes looking sensire “It won’t affect your grade no matter how you decide.” “I want this”
I breathed out our lips immediately finding each other. The kiss was passionate and heated until Nat pulled away to fasten my seat belt.
“I’ll drive to my apartment” She put her own seatbelt on “Is that okay with you or do you want to go to your dorm” “I’d like to join your tonight” Natasha gave you a cheeky grin at the response her plan had worked out perfectly.
Arriving at her apartment she seated you on her leather couch. She paced around her living room having two wine glasses in hand. “Do you want a glass?” I laughed I was extremely nervous but in a good way “Oh, I don’t drink but I’ll have a water instead” She just nodded accepting my preferences.
“You’re the prettiest girl I’ve met” She laughed slipping away from her wine glass. “And I’m not just saying that because of the wine.” She added she was sat next to her hand on your thigh. She had long forgotten about her crumpled up suit jacket on the ground though she normally was so precise about keeping everything organized.
“You don’t look bad either” You laughed she pulled you on her lap forcing you to but your legs on either side her crotch on yours. “Let me kiss you” she mumbled against you wet lips. You lips were pressed together so where your bodies and you could feel a bulge poking you. “Fuck you make me so hard” she breathed out on your lips making you moan out in response.
We were caught in the dance of our tongues when I felt her standing up her arms under my ass supporting my weight. I giggle and tighten my grip around her. “Let me take you to the bedroom”
She laid me out on the bed being careful with every item removed and making sure I was comfortable. She kissed everything inch of my skin paying extra attention to my sweet spots and I never felt so loved before. “Have you done that before” She breathed put against my skin.
“Never” I answer truthfully and suddenly I felt a dang of jealousy in my chest. “Is that- a problem?” My professor moved up again before kissing me “Of course not” She looked me in the eyes with her green eyes. “Will you let me be your first” She was being incredibly cheesy but Iiked that. It made me feel safe. “Yes”
She took one of my nipples in her mouth twisting and turning the other with her trained fingertips. She made me putty in her hands with each lick or flick she brought a new sound from my tongue.
My back arched which only made her increase the speed of her movements. After she seemed it to be enough foreplay she kissed her way down to my pubic bone, pressing her nose against my skin to take in the smell of my sweet arrausel. “Can I bunny?” She smirked and kissed your clit I was already wet but Nat was dying for a taste. She flicked her tongue over my now exposed bud. The pleasure was incredible better than any other toy I ever had and you tried to not lose my mind as she teased you bundle of nerves.
She pulled away shortly after ripping away my release in front of my eyes. I looked at her confused as she was already freeing herself from her boxer. She didn’t have a size to be ashamed of and her bush was well groomed too, like you would’ve suspected. She pumped herself a few times groaning until she was fully hard a little droplet of cum on the redden tip.
“Wait I’ll put a condom on” She reached for the drawer but you stopped her “I’m on the pill” Her lips formed a smirk as she positioned herself between my legs. “It’s not gonna hurt sweetheart” She reassured you kissing my neck.
She pushed inside and I making me scratch down her toned back making her whimper. Fuck her whimpers where hot. She bottomed me out looking down at where our bodies were connected she smiled up at you and you smiled back and after I nodded to her she picked up pace.
She was slow at first making me want more you could tell she being careful with you. “Faster” I moaned out making you hips buckle into her trusts. She moaned like a pornstar panting above me as she increased her speed the bed creaking. She made my back arch and my eyes squeezed shut as I released my quiet prayers for her.
“You close?” She panted and I nod “Fuck, your so tight” I grabbed on her shoulders scratching down as I came all over her shortly after she filled me up too. She pulled out the cum leaking down my legs. She climbed up my body flipping us over so I lay on her chest.
“You’re my favourite” She whispered and kissed my sweaty forehead
:)
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fingertipsmp3 · 2 years
Text
Realising I maybe don’t actually like my supposed ‘best’ friend
#like i’m not saying i hate her or anything it’s just. i see a notification coming in from her whether it’s a text or a call#and i just get annoyed. half of the things she does piss me off#her complete lack of time management is infuriating to me; the fact that she’s a doormat for every single goddamn person in her life#the way she wants to be liked SO BADLY by complete random people and honest-to-god assholes… like i have that problem sometimes as well#but i’m significantly better at saying ‘no’ and also when it’s absolutely necessary ‘fuck off with your jesus pamphlets’#and also i don’t think i’ve ever really forgotten the way she cosied up to my bullies back in high school. there was this girl#who was threatening me and stealing from me and outright pushing me around & g was best friends with this girl’s sister who abetted her#and the whole group spread vile rumours about me and used to gossip about me loudly (to the point where i could hear them)#and g would gossip about me as well. and she’s apologised since then but she’s still friends or at least associated#with most of those people and i don’t think i’ve ever really forgiven her for selling me down the river for an ounce of social capital#which like. these girls were losers as well. they were just a group of losers rather than one lone loser like me#like congrats you got into the sad girls clique and bullied the nerd girl. for why though#and i still don’t get why they wouldn’t let me in or why they hated me so much. i would’ve fit right in. and yeah this was ten years ago#but i’m still mad. sue me#like she literally could’ve put in a good word for me but instead she contributed to the already hard time i was going through and i know#i Know i should forgive and forget. but i can’t shake the conviction that she would absolutely do something similar#and the fact that my friend group welcomed her with open arms and she’s still friends with some of them to this day. i don’t think she even#realises tbh. like hello… i gave you two lifelong friendships. i’m not saying you had to force your friends to like me in return#but like at least do the bare minimum of calling them off. those girls made me want to kill myself#and she also does this thing where if a guy likes me instead of her she takes it soooo personally and has to date him#and i’m just like. i’m attracted to men literally about once a year. i did not want to fuck andy the farmer#also he just offered to walk me home and i looked him up and down; laughed and said ‘you’re what i need to be protected from mate’#you were consoling him if anything. and will the fuckboy?? don’t make me laugh. he only hit on her because i started blatantly#playing candy crush when he tried to talk to me#tl;dr uhhhh when and how do i end a 16 year deeply codependent friendship. lol#personal#*complicating factors: i am the only person in her daughter’s life who is not an idiot. i love her daughter and want to be a good aunty#also she lives literally 0.2km away from me and the only other friends i have are an ex-colleague and my other best friend who lives in WA#and my old flatmate who i don’t really talk to anymore#i really need to like. artifically resurrect some friendships if i’m going to go through with this
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cap-winter-barnes · 2 months
Text
He’s A Loser (Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x Reader)
Y/N is Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw’s little sister and he’s finally introduced her to the rest of Dagger Squad. What neither of them anticipated was them both have an instant attraction, despite Bradley’s best efforts, the inevitable still happens.
Part Two
Warnings: swearing
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The Hard Deck is overflowing with men and women in uniform, which is why you stick out like a sore thumb. Bradley told you to keep it casual, but how could you keep it casual when you were the only one not dressed in khaki. You toy with the hem of your blouse as you search the packed out bar for your brother and his aviator friends.
“Hey, Y/N! Over here!” Bradley spotted you first, not that it was difficult with your attire. Laid back as usual, your brother lounges against the side of the snooker table, cue in hand and a big smile on his face. “Everyone, this is Y/N! Y/N this is Dagger!” There’s an exchange of ‘hellos’ and introductions as you greet Bradley with a hug. The only woman of the group, Phoenix, has been waiting for the day another female joins their social gatherings and welcomes you with open arms. Yet as you chat away, you can see your older sibling glaring daggers at the men of the group who have yet to find a distraction from your arrival.
“Well, well, well…” Bradley drops his head and sighs. “If it isn’t ‘Baby Bradshaw”. That voice automatically sends shivers down your spine, there’s only one man that could cause that reaction in Bradley Bradshaw. You’d been given the run down on the infamous ‘Hangman’, with your brother warning you about his cocky ego. But when you turn to meet him yourself, you don’t expect for him to be as handsome as he is. His uniform barely containing his toned arms. Meeting his eyes, you can’t help but smile as you soak in the green of his gaze.
“And you must be Hangman?” You reach out a hand to shake, and it appears you’re not what he was expecting either as he trails his eyes over you before taking your hand in his. Now you’re not one for cliches but you could swear you feel a shock of electricity through his touch. When you meet his eyes again, it seems he felt the same.
“Yes, ma’am. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.” Before you can respond, Bradley is shouldering his way between the two of you, his overprotective big brother personality shining through once again. “Rooster?”
“What did I tell you Bagman? Hmm?” Hangman raises his hands in surrender and backs away. “That’s what I thought.”
“Brad, what the fuck?” You can feel your anger simmering, you love your brother dearly but you’re a grown woman, you can stand up for and look after yourself.
“He’s a loser. Don’t even think about it.”
“I-“
“I said what I said, Y/N. Don’t.”
It doesn't take long for your brother to drink enough to get distracted by pretty girls on the other side of the bar. Jake takes the opportunity to sneak a conversation with you beside the jukebox, a whisky in his hand and a smile on his face.
"So Baby Bradshaw..."
"Are you really going to keep calling me that... Hangman?" He chuckles at your retort.
"Would you prefer, Baby Girl, instead?" You flush at his words as you take your lower lip between your front teeth. It's not often that you find yourself at a loss for words, yet here Jake Seresin stands making you tongue-tied. "I'm taking that as a yes."
"You are such a flirt, Seresin." His eyebrow lifts as you use his surname. "You talk to all the girls like this?" He's never met a woman quite like you and it's safe to say that he's falling deep already.
"No, ma'am. Only the beautiful young lady who just so happens to be the baby sister of my dear old pal, Rooster." Whisky glass discarded, Jake's now empty hand snakes around your waist, pulling you closer. "And no one could ever compare to a woman like her."
"Oh you are smooth." Your hands trail up his chest, nails scraping against the material of his uniform. The feel of his heart hammering in his chest thumps against your palms. You don't dare let him go, wanting to soak in his touch for as long as you possibly can. "So are you going to kiss me or not Hangman?"
"Yes, ma'am."
Part Two
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Okay, so I'm thinking of doing a Part 2 for this? I'd love to know what you guys think, so please let me know - I'm super excited to carry this one on but wanted to give you all a little taster first.
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stillmonsterz · 6 months
Text
brave it together
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pairing: jay x reader, jake x reader genre: smut, angst, slight humor summary: ever since you started your first year at sadame university three months ago, jay has been bothering you. you try to keep your head bowed down, but you're finding it harder and harder to keep to yourself. an approaching storm, a party, and your job at the university's library inadvertently lead to you being entangled in the clandestine world of the karma club. you're starting to discover that there's more to jay, and more to yourself, than you could have imagined. contains: unprotected sex, rape, noncon, drug usage, alcohol mention, manipulation, suicide, murder, death threats, infidelity, exhibitionism, physical violence, piss. word count: 24.6k
taglist: @moon7jay @ui11iane @belowbun
Sometimes you wished you could be someone else. You wished you could have been like the other girls at your university, the ones that crowd in groups, that go to the bathroom together to make sure that they’re all safe. Girls that talk about everything with each other, who share common interests and talk to each other about their own interests. Friends who would listen.
You wished that you could know what to say. You wished that you knew the right way to act, to speak, the right way to think to make people care. You wished you didn’t repel others.
You only wished for this sometimes. 
You’re stocking the shelves of the university’s library. It’s an easy campus job, one that pays decently. You’re here on a partial scholarship, so you tried to save money however you could. The library was one of the reasons why you applied here in the first place; it was well-stocked, had vaulted ceilings in the main room, and, to your delight, had physical copies of rare books. 
 All you wished for right now was for the day to end so you could go home, watch an awful 60s giallo with vibrant paint for blood and eye candy to ogle, and avoid an encounter from Jay. You weren’t in the mood today.
Isa, a girl two years above yours, pushed the metal cart replete with books and occasionally pointed out where they should go. She had been doing this since last year, so she had a far better idea of you about the layout of the library.
You crouched down to the carpeted floor, scouring the bottom-most shelf for the appropriate spot.  “Next to the copy of ‘Neuroscience for Dummies’,” Isa said idly, pointing with a well-manicured finger. Isa was red-headed and gorgeous, and had an impeccable sense of fashion; she was wearing a white cashmere sweater with a thick, plaid skirt, knee-high black socks, and leather shoes. On top of that, she was intelligent, friendly, and incredibly personable. You wondered why she wouldn’t go somewhere else and leave the library to losers such as yourself. 
“Thanks,” you muttered, placing the book in its proper place.
“You know,” Isa began. You lifted your head up to meet her eyes, which were sparkling with a mischievous glint. “You’d look pretty with some makeup.”
You blinked, uncertain of how to respond. “I’m not pretty right now?”
Isa waved her hands contritely and shook her head. “No, no, not at all. I mean, you are pretty, it’s just…you’d look even better with makeup.”
“Oh…” Grasping for another book, you avoided Isa’s gaze. Not only did you not believe her, but you wondered why she was telling you this. She was probably just messing with you. Even a saint would take one look at you and tell you to kill yourself. For whatever reason, people seemed to dislike you, as though you emitted a repelling odor. “Look better?”
“Yeah,” Isa said cheerfully. “If you look better, you’ll feel better, too.” 
“Maybe,” you said, shoving another book onto the shelf. 
“Seriously,” Isa continued, and you wished she would just drop it. “You could probably pull a Karma Club member if you tried.”
Now she was definitely just fucking with you. She of all people should know that guys like that would have very little interest in you; Isa was popular, and you had seen her and her friends hanging around some of the KC members. Whenever you saw her and Jay in the same place, you’d walk the other way. Thankfully, Jay tended to spare you the humiliation of being mocked in front of others. He preferred to do it when no one was looking. “I’d rather not,” you replied, feeling around for another book from the cart. Isa handed you one, and you shuffled away to shelve it.
“Aw, why not?”
“They’re…weird,” you said simply. 
“They’re not all bad,” Isa said, and you slowly turned your head to glance up at her. Isa’s face was sheepish, and she was toying with her bracelet. Jesus. She liked one of them? Having a crush on a Karma Club member was practically a form of hybristophilia. You wondered which one she liked. Probably Jake, the nice one. 
Isa started to speak again, but some male student came up to her. “The printer’s busted again,” he said with an eye roll. 
“Annoying,” Isa muttered. “I’ll be back. Try not to have too much fun without me.” You gave her a curt nod and she gave you a thumbs-up before scampering off to save the day. You watched her retreating figure, then looked down at your hands. 
You reached up to grab another book from the cart, but someone’s hand rested on yours. First, your eyes traced the shoes (balenciaga sneakers) then up to his jeans (Levi’s, black, distressed), his Joy Division t-shirt, and finally, reluctantly, they settled on his face. Penetrating dark eyes framed by thick eyebrows, one of which was adorned by a silver eyebrow piercing looked down at you. His lips were fixed into their habitual crooked smirk. The heady scent of Tom Ford wafted from his body. 
“Yeah, you could be really pretty,” Jay said, batting his eyelashes. He grabbed your hand and jerked you upright, your chest hitting the metal cart as you staggered to your feet. “You could be a model, honestly.”
As always, you just stared at Jay blankly. What else could you do? The idea of begging him to stop or making some quippy little remark just made you cringe at yourself. Jay dropped your arm and walked behind you, rubbing your shoulders with a strong grip. You managed to avoid flinching, something you considered a small victory.
“Don’t know why Isa lied to you,” Jay whispered into your ear. “If you put lipstick on a pig, it’s still a pig. If you put some makeup on a prude, it’s still a frigid little bitch, wouldn’t you say?”
Clenched teeth, pursed lips, fixed gaze. That was how you dealt with Jay. You stared at the books directly in front of you, rearranging them in your head by height. 
Jay made a low noise at the back of his throat. “You know,” he began, and his thumbs dug into your shoulder blades, “I’m getting really sick of this mute shit. I know you can talk, prude. Say it. Say that you’re a bitch.” 
The Secret History of the Moon Landing is the tallest, from your direct line of sight. You could put it with Mars and its Mysteries: The Red Planet Uncovered, and then Pluto as a Planet. 
Jay’s fingers clenched around your shoulders painfully. “I told you to talk. Come on.”
You and Jay were obscured by the tall bookshelf in front of you, so when Isa’s sleek oxfords came into view, Jay slid his arms around your neck in what could be mistaken for an embrace. “Hey, Isa,” Jay said amicably, his chin resting on your shoulder. You finally looked away from the shelf.
“Hi, Jay,” Isa said, stopping just beside the book cart. Her gaze flicked from you to Jay to Jay’s arms around you. “I didn’t know you two knew each other.”
“Nah, her and I go way back,” Jay said, and you didn’t have to look at him to know that he had a shit-eating grin plastered on his face. “Been taking care of her since she got to Sad.” The school’s name was Sadame University, but everyone just called it Sad U or just Sad. 
Isa’s eyes kept flashing between you and Jay, and the genuine smile she normally wore had been replaced by a far less sanguine expression. “Oh, wow,” she said softly, fiddling with her charm bracelet again. 
Jay nodded, his black hair tickling your chin. “Mhm. I was just inviting her to come to the KC party with me, but she doesn’t want to come.” He tilted your chin towards him, so that you were forced to look at him. “You should go out more,” he said lightly, but his eyes betrayed him. 
You didn’t say a word. 
His hand dropped back down to your shoulder. “Doesn’t go out and doesn’t talk. How do you put up with her?” Jay’s voice was jovial, almost like you were really friends. 
Isa laughed, almost too enthusiastically. “I know, right? These are the best years of our life, you know? Can’t waste ‘em inside all the time.” Does she seriously believe that shit? 
“Yeah, you should listen to your cute friend more often,” Jay said, shaking you once before clapping you on the back and letting go of you. He nodded at Isa, who was preening in front of Jay. “You should come to the party, Isa. The storm party on Friday, at Yeonjun’s. You know where his place is?”
“No, I don’t,” Isa said, tilting her head. Her glossy lips were pursed, and she admittedly looked really cute. If you didn’t know what kind of person Jay really was, you would think that they would make a good couple based on looks alone. Studious and playful Isa with pierced, crude Jay.  A bunny with a wolf. 
“I’ll take you,” Jay said, striding towards her. “You got my number?” 
“I have your Snap, I think.”
They exchanged numbers. You went back to stocking books. 
After a lengthy conversation that you had tuned out, you felt Jay ruffle your hair. “See you around, prude,” he whispered before walking away. His hands were shoved in his pockets. 
Isa stared after him before turning to you and biting her lip. “I didn’t know you knew Jay,” Isa said, her tone playfully accusatory. “You sly vixen.”
“You know him?”
Isa paused. “You could say that. He’s cute.”
“I didn’t know he was your type,” you said simply. “I thought you’d be into, uh, Jake.”
Isa snorted. “Nah, didn’t you hear?”
“No, what?”
Isa giggled before leaning in, as though she was telling a trade secret. “I heard that Jake is kind of a dick.”
– 
You had become disillusioned with the Karma Club mere hours into your first day at Sadame University. During an idle walk around the campus after your first class, you had ended up near a warehouse next to the facility where the sporting equipment was kept. There, you had seen a tanned, lean man standing in front of an equally tall person who was caged against the wall of the warehouse. You lingered in the parking lot facing the warehouse, hiding yourself behind one of the staff’s pick-up trucks. 
The tanned one, clad in all black, was goading the other one. A third person, an almost eerily-pale man wearing a brown blazer with a turtleneck and black slacks, was watching from a safe distance. 
“Go on,” the one in all black said. “Hit me. Unless you’re too pussy.”
Finally, the one pressed against the wall landed a feeble punch on his assailant’s cheek. The two other men looked at each other before bursting out into laughter. 
“At least pretend to be hurt, Jay,” the pale one had said, clapping his friend on the back. “You’re making him look bad.”
“You’re right,” Jay had said, clearing his throat. He pretended to be blown backwards, and his friend laughed even harder. Jay righted himself. You couldn’t see his face from this angle, but his body language seemed so tense, reminiscent of a dog with raised hackles. The guy who had thrown the punch at Jay looked confused and embarrassed, almost meek.
“Hey. You hit me first,” Jay had said. “Didn’t he, Sunghoon?”
“He did,” Sunghoon had said, nodding sagely. “He…I think he bruised you, Jay.”
“Bruised me,” Jay said, cracking his knuckles. “So this is a fight now.” With that, Jay had released an onslaught of punches onto the guy’s body. You were a fair distance away from the fight, if you could call it that, but you could still hear the thump of skin on skin. As Jay continued to wail on him, the guy slowly crumpled to his feet and shielded himself from the hits, covering his face with his arms. Sunghoon just watched, still laughing to himself. 
Jay had spit on the dirt. He had said something you couldn’t hear before digging his hands into his pockets. As he surveyed the school grounds, maybe for witnesses, his eyes landed directly on you. You stared back at him, your stomach dropping. You really hadn’t wanted to be involved in whatever hazing ritual this was. You hid yourself behind the truck again, to no avail. Jay stalked towards you, putting his hand up so that Sunghoon wouldn’t follow. 
You leaned against the trunk of the pick-up truck, and Jay stood in front of you. He assessed you for a nearly unbearably long time, taking in your appearance from your toes to your head. He crossed his arms and caught your gaze. An unexpected smile graced his lips, revealing a deep dimple on his cheek. He was unmistakably handsome. 
“Hey. No need to be scared. That was just something between friends,” Jay had said, his voice devoid of the haughtiness you’d heard earlier.  “We were just playing.”
You nodded, your hands clutching the straps of your backpack. Like you were a kid. 
Jay had frowned, scratching the back of his head. Then he stuck his hand out, regaining his smile. “I’m Jay, Jay Park. I’m a business major. Third year.”
You could see where his knuckles had split because of how hard he had hit that guy, and you were so captured by the sight that you didn’t shake his hand or talk. It wasn’t an uncommon occurrence. Sometimes you just forgot to talk. 
“Hey,” Jay said, and your eyes flickered back up to his face. HIs smile had completely disappeared, and you wondered if it had been very difficult for him to maintain a veneer of civility. “Don’t be rude. What’s your name?” 
You told him your name, withholding your major. 
“Never heard of you,” he had said with a sniff, withdrawing his hand. “Are you new?”
You nodded again. 
“Jesus.” Jay stepped closer to you, and somehow the frustration dripping from his voice and painted on his face was familiar. “Do you talk?”
“If I know someone,” you said.
Jay had laughed mirthlessly. “Aren’t you special? ‘I’m too good to talk to other people, I’m so mysterious, look at me!’ Anyone ever tell you that that shit isn’t cute?”
Plenty of times, you had thought. Instead of saying that, you just shrugged. 
“Fucking weirdo,” Jay had muttered. “Look, don’t say anything to anyone about this, okay? Or else I’ll…”
“Or else what?”
Jay scoffed and slammed one hand next to your head, his rings scraping the exterior truck. His face had craned towards your own, and his eyes flickered with a cold, sadistic gleam. “Or else…” Jay had leaned in towards your ear, whispering, “Or else I’ll do something really, really bad.”
With that, he hit the truck once more for good measure and strode away. His friend Sunghoon had followed behind him, casting a withering glance at you as he crossed the parking lot. 
You didn’t look back at the person Jay had beat up. You just walked to your next lecture hall, sat down, and tried to focus.
You hadn’t known it then, but that had been your first encounter with two of the members of the Karma Club. Through sheer social osmosis over the past three months, you had learnt about them - more than you had ever wanted to, really. The Karma Club was an exclusive society that had been founded at Sadame some time in the 60s. The idea was to round up the richest, most powerful students -or, alternatively, the students who wanted to have a “lot of fucking fun”- and give them carte blanche to do whatever they wanted.
 Students is a broad term for them. There’s never been a female member of Karma Club to date. The closest a woman could get to being punched is to date one of the members, although you don’t see why anyone would want that. They’re attractive, sure, but between the stories you’ve heard, the things you’ve seen, and what you’ve experienced, you’d rather toss yourself off of the roof than date a member of that stupid fucking club. 
There were seven members: Heeseung Lee, Sunghoon Park, Jake Sim, Sunoo Kim, Jungwon Yang, Nishimura Riki, and Jay Park. Generally, people either tried to avoid the members, or they did everything they could to get their attention. Apparently last year Sunoo had gotten pissed off at the Sad U cheerleading team and put laxatives in their pre-game protein shakes, but they all showed up to his birthday party the following month anyways. There was another rumour, that Heeseung had vandalized the interior of an upscale restaurant in the city because his girlfriend didn’t like the hors d’oeuvres. 
You figured that Jay Park fit squarely into the “richest and most powerful” student category, because you had never witnessed him have fun, at least in the traditional sense. When he smiled, it was generally because someone else was in pain. The only smile you’d seen him wear was that self-satisfied smirk.
At any rate, there it was. Your first introduction to the Karma Club, your first meeting with Jay, and the last time a man had voluntarily spoken to you at school. Go figure.
– 
After your unfortunate encounter with Jay in the library, you needed a pick-me-up, and fast. You made a beeline for the smoothie shop in the Stopkewich dorms. Your university had four colleges: Stopkewich, where the liberal arts majors tended to stay, Fawcett, where most of the dorm parties took place, Nakashima, the unofficial home of the STEM majors, and Stoker college, where the most affluent students lived. It was there that the Karma Club resided, in a tall, red brick building surrounded by oak trees marked by a large, multi-tiered fountain. 
Stopkewich was more conservative, a simple light brick college with a stone path leading into one of the entrances. Groups of people milled about under copses of trees or rested on the plush, well-maintained grass. It was a dreary day, but the weather was mild. As you walked through the door, you wished that you had chosen this college instead. You had decided to be practical and chose the college whose classes were closest to your own dorm, so you had chosen Fawcett. Without any knowledge of the intricate culture behind the colleges, you had ended up in the loudest one. Worse yet, you couldn’t switch out of it. 
Every college had their own restaurants. Stopkewich’s smoothie shop was situated right next to their vegan and gluten-free place, staffed by two enthusiastic, perky goths. To your delight, your favourite worker was there, refilling the bucket of biodegradable straws. 
“Hi, Lily,” you said, walking to the counter. A girl with pink hair, large eyes, and a wide smile turned to look at you.
“Hey,” she said brightly. “You want to try my newest concoction?”
“Sure, what is it?”
“It’s going to be passionfruit, mango, strawberry…”
You shrugged. “Sounds standard so far.”
“And maca root,” she added, holding up a tuberous plant with a wicked grin.
“Isn’t that…doesn’t that boost fertility?” you asked suspiciously.
Lily pulled out a bamboo cutting board and started chopping the root into tiny pieces. “No clue. I bought it because it sounded like macaroon. They never should have let my goofy ass buy the ingredients.”
“I see.”
Lily tossed the root into the blender and started heaping fruits inside of it. “Have you heard about that storm that’s coming?”
You sat down on one of the bright red stools while you waited. “No.”
“It’s supposed to be bad,” she said, turning on the blender. She raised her voice so she could be heard over the noise. “They’re saying we might lose power.”
“When?” you yelled.
“This Friday.” Lily turned off the blender and poured the smoothie into a glass jar. If you brought ten glass jars to the smoothie shop, they’d give you a free smoothie. You were gunning for a free smoothie by the end of the week. 
You paid for the drink with your campus card and took a sip. “Well?” she asked expectantly, leaning over the counter. 
“It’s good,” you said, staring down at the vibrantly-coloured smoothie. “Can’t even taste the fertility.”
“Another win for me,” she said, wiping down the counter. 
“Thanks, Lily.”
Lily shot a finger gun at you and winked. “That’s what I’m here for.”
You continued to drink your smoothie, swinging your feet as you sat on the colourful stool. Normally, you didn’t like to linger in public spaces, but Jay never came to Stopkewich. Lily was so calm and friendly, and she didn’t pressure you to talk, so you weren’t in a rush to leave.
“You know, you’re my favourite customer,” Lily said. 
You smiled softly. “Really?”
“Mhm. The other day, one of those stupid Kum Club members came here and asked for something that wasn’t on the menu. I said I don’t do remix smoothies, and he got so mad.”
You didn’t have trouble picturing which one that could be. 
“Those guys are freaks,” Lily said, wiping her hands on her apron. “I swear I remember hearing that they tried to straight up murder someone in the bathroom over something silly.”
“That sounds a little far-fetched.” Jay was a dick, but you couldn’t imagine him killing someone in cold blood.
Lily pointed at you. “You’ve only been here for a few months, so you don’t know. The Karma Club is far-fetched. That’s how they get away with it.”
It was always a bit bittersweet, leaving Stopkewich. Here, you almost blended in. There were quite a few moody girls who dressed in long skirts and baggy sweaters, who kept their heads low and wore bulky over-ear headphones. They milled about, smoking joints wrapped with rose petals and sage, sitting in corners drawing. 
The short trek to Fawcett gave way to girls wearing trendy, cute crop tops with curve-fitting jeans and guys wearing the ugliest fucking outfits imaginable. You wondered what the point of being cute was when all you had to show for it were idiots wearing Nike techs? 
Navigating the halls of your college was always a task. Somehow, there was always a throng of people cluttering the halls. Isa lived in this college too, and would wave every time she saw you. Thankfully, you didn’t see her today, so you could safely slip inside of your dorm room. 
You threw yourself onto your bed and sighed deeply, allowing yourself to decompress. Soon, you would do your homework, blasting music to drown out the noises of young adult debauchery. Then, like every other night when the weather was good, you would sneak over to the library, use the entrance to the roof located on the third floor, and sit on the roof and smoke. It was one of your few acts of rebellion, although you doubted that willingly poisoning yourself could be considered an act of rebellion against anything besides good health. 
For now, you rested. 
The next day was more of the same. Long, tiresome classes, stint at the library, brief reprieve with Lily, then to your dorm room. Strangely enough, Jay hadn’t spoken to you. Over the past three months, you had grown accustomed to at least a “prude bitch” being tossed at you, or even more.
He had been getting worse. Lately, just like yesterday, he’s been touching you. You don’t know how you feel about it, nor do you know why his behavior has been escalating. 
When you walked into Fawcett again and headed left to get to your dorm room, you saw Jay and Jake Sim hovering near a bulletin-board. You’d be lying if you didn’t find Jake a little cute, despite the unsavoury things you had heard about him. He had tousled, dark brown hair and a wide smile. He was wearing the navy blue Sad U sweatshirt with a baggy pair of grey sweatpants. Seeing Jay standing next to him with a scowl on his face ruined the picture, however. 
“He’s always fucking late,” you heard Jay mutter. You figured that he was talking about Anton, one of the only Karma Club affiliates you knew that didn’t live in Stoker. He was rich enough, popular enough, and snarky enough, but maybe being around the Karma Club that often would drive you insane. Jay had accosted you a few times while he was waiting for Anton, but he had never had Jake in tow. In fact, you rarely saw Jake and Jay hang out. 
This didn’t concern you. You were about to turn on your heels and head back outside when you heard Jay call your name mockingly. When you looked up, he was beckoning you with his fingers lazily. 
That little motion pissed you off, so you decided to leave, clutching your little glass jar. As soon as you opened the heavy wooden doors, you felt hands grab you back. Jay was sneering at you. “Mute and blind, huh?” His grip on your sweater tightened. “You’re like a less fuckable Helen Keller.”
“Jesus.” Jake had sidled over to Jay and was looking at him with annoyance. “Leave her alone, Jay. Hasn’t it gotten old by now?”
Jay let go of your sweater, but his eyes still smoldered. “Didn’t see you wearing a cape.”
Jake crossed his arms. “Huh?”
“Look,” Jay said, shoving his bejeweled hands into his pockets, “I just didn’t know you still liked to stick your dick in crazy. That’s cool. I actually have a few exes you could hit u-,”
“I don’t have to want to fuck a girl to know when you’re being shitty to her for no reason,” Jake said, and his eyes rested on your face. You hated how gentle his gaze was. You couldn’t trust it. 
Jay developed a sly little smirk. “So you don’t want to fuck her?”
“No way,” Jake said hastily.  His gaze snapped to your face and he laughed nervously, scratching the nape of his neck. “I mean, you know, not in like, a bad way, just that, like…”
You’d rather have Jay call you a frigid whore for ten hours than hear anymore of this. When you tried to push past Jay to go to your dorm room, he grabbed your shoulders so harshly that the glass jar in your hand went flying. It shattered on the floor in the middle of the hallway, and bright red splatters of smoothie splattered onto the walls like a crude Jackson Pollock painting. 
You heard laughter behind you, and you pulled yourself away from Jay. He let you go, surprisingly. Sinking to your knees, you used your bare hands to pluck the worst shards of glass from the linoleum. “Leave it,” a voice whispered, and when you turned you saw Jake shaking his head. “Someone else will clean it up. It wasn’t your fault.”
“Someone might step on the glass,” you said quietly, still crouched on the floor. 
“Oh, boo-hoo, someone might step on the glass,” Jay said derisively. 
“Fuck’s sake, shut up,” Jake muttered. He gently pulled the glass out of your hands and set it on the floor. “I’ll go get a janitor, okay?”
“What do you want?” you whispered.
Jake scrunched his nose in confusion. “What?”
You shook your head. “Never mind.” 
“Hey,” Jake said softly. Belatedly, you realized that he had crouched to your level. “Tomorrow, Jay said he’s gonna visit Isa at the library. Do you want me to come along, to be kind of a buffer? I know he’s a dick to you.”
“Do whatever you want.” 
Jake just chuckled. “You’re not the friendliest, are you?”
You shrugged.
“I probably deserve it,” Jake said with a smile so good-natured, you almost smiled too. Thankfully, you caught a hold of yourself and stood upright. This wasn’t the first time that Jake had extended a modicum of kindness towards you. Two weeks ago, when Jay had “accidentally” spilled his energy drink all over your sweater, Jake had fished money out of his pocket and tucked it into your hand before catching up to Jay. Since then, Jake had been hanging around Jay more than Sunghoon did. You figured that Sunghoon was busy, or maybe they didn’t like each other anymore. Who knew? Who cared?
Jay sniffed. “So what?” he said, looking you up and down. “You only pull the selective mutism shit with me? I’m really hurt.”
You fought the urge to roll your eyes and walked away with your head bent, so you didn’t have to see the people who were invariably staring at you. Normally, Jay didn’t bother you in front of other people, just in crowded hallways, when he caught you going in-between classes, or in the library. 
As you were doing your schoolwork, a question began to form in your head, making itself wide, unavoidable, and encompassing. Why didn’t Jay just meet Isa in her dorm tomorrow? Why go to the library when she’ll be busy? He couldn’t even harass you in front of her, or at least as overtly as he normally did, so what was the point? 
That was always the question with Jay: what was the point?
After your classes on Wednesday was your job at the library. As you walked over to the main desk to check your tasks for the day, you spotted Jake, Jay, and Isa all talking. So Jake had shown up anyways. They were huddled by the desk, as though they were all co-conspirators. You noticed that Isa was wearing a black pleated skirt with a baggy t-shirt, a stark difference from her usual, more preppy style. As you approached, Isa turned to you and smiled.
“Hey,” she said, waving you towards her. You walked over to the desk, where she made a space for you to stand. You awkwardly positioned yourself between Isa and Jake, trying to avoid Jay’s eyes. “Let’s see. Today, we’re on shelving duty, we have to catalogue the newest shipment of books-,” Isa nodded at a sizable stack of pristine books, “and we have to load them into the online filing system.”
You nodded your understanding and grabbed the book list from the top of the book pile. 
“Hey,” Jake said. He grinned at you, his shaggy hair getting in his eyes. He flicked it out with the casual, unselfconscious ease of a surfer who had spent all morning riding waves. 
“Hi,” you said quietly. Jay was being unusually quiet, his arm slung around Isa’s shoulders. He looked directly at her, ignoring you for once. How lovely.
“So, uh…” Jake scratched the nape of his neck again. “ Yesterday, I noticed you had that smoothie…looked pretty good.”
“It was,” you replied, and Jake laughed a little. 
“Where’d you get it from? There aren’t any smoothie places on campus.”
“There is,” you said, pointing west. “Stopkewich has one.”
“Oh, damn. I had no clue. I don’t really go to Stopkewich that much.”
“You should go sometime,” Jay piped up, his voice as arrogant and snarky as usual. “There’s plenty of girls with daddy issues who’d let you do all sorts of weird, depraved shit to them.”
“You would know,” Jake retorted, and you couldn’t help but smile. 
Isa gasped. “Oh, wow. Jake, she’s actually smiling.” When the grin dropped off of your face, Isa pouted. “Aw, no. Your smile was actually so pretty. Wasn’t it, Jay?”
Jay looked at you and pursed his lips. “Yours is prettier, Isa,” he said, staring directly at you. You felt something stir in you, some foreign emotion, but you weren’t entirely sure what it was.
Isa smacked Jay playfully on his chest. “Don’t pit us girls against each other,” she said, flicking her hair over her shoulder. “I’m a girl’s girl, you know.”
You turned away from them and started to go around the desk. “I’ll start loading these into the computer now,” you said quietly. 
Jake reached out and grabbed your wrist. “Hey, wait,” he said, lowering his voice. “Did you want an invite to the party on Friday? The one at Yeonjun’s?”
You stared at his hand. “Why would I want one?”
Jake hesitated before letting go of you, shoving his hand into his pocket.  “I dunno. So you can go and maybe have fun?”
“She doesn’t have fun,” Jay said. So much venom leaked into his voice that even Isa looked caught off guard. His eyes were still trained on you. “She just sits inside all the time, doing her homework, knitting scarves, listening to fucking Mazzy Star.”
“What’s wrong with Mazzy Star?” Isa asked.
“Whiny, plebeian indie shit,” Jay said disdainfully, picking up one of the books on the desk with his spare hand before setting it down.
Isa pouted again. “I like Mazzy Star.”
Jay didn’t even look at her. “Great.”
Jake turned back to look at you. “Just think about it, okay? I can give you a formal invite. I know you aren’t the party type. I’m not really, either. Haven’t been for a while.”
You hesitated before saying, “I’ll think about it.” You turned your back to them and set about cataloging the new books, hefting the pile in your arms. You didn’t have to look behind you to know that Jay’s gaze was burning a hole in your back.
Later that night, you received a text from Isa as you lounged in bed knitting. Normally, you two only corresponded to discuss your job, so this was a surprise. You set down your needle and yarn and unlocked your phone. 
“could u come to the library rq?” she had texted. It reeked. What could possibly be happening there that would require your presence. As you were putting your phone back down, you got another text. 
“it’s jay” followed by “he’s acting really weird rn…”
Right. Isa thought that you and Jay were somehow friends, and she was probably too shy to ask Jake for help. So her boyfriend finally reared his ugly head, and now she was calling on you for help. Clearly, she couldn’t be in that much trouble if she could text you.
You shrugged a jacket over your nightgown, tugged your shoes on, pocketed a Swiss Army knife, and headed outside. You had no intentions of hurting anyone, but it made you feel sort of cool.
It was raining heavily, a prelude to the oncoming storm. You ran across campus with your hood up and headed to the library. It was its own building, nearly as big as one of the dorm buildings, which is why stocking the shelves was a two-person job. You pulled your keys from your pocket, opened the doors, and stepped inside.
Your shoes squelched on the welcome mat, so you took them off along with your wet socks. Isa hadn’t said what part of the library she was in. It was a tall, distinguished three story building - one floor for non-fiction books, one floor for fiction, and one floor with a little student-run cafe and a sprawling arrangement of tables and computers. You didn’t text her, in case she had covertly sent the message. She might actually be in trouble, and then where would you be? 
Your Swiss Army knife burnt a hole into your pocket as you walked around the dark library. The rain drummed on the windows, making it difficult to hear anything. The only light came from the moonlight streaming through the skylight and the lamps affixed to every wall that turned on automatically after 8 pm. 
Soon, you heard a strange noise coming from one of the aisles. Straining over the pitter-patter echoing from outside, you followed the noise to the back of the library.
You shoved your hand into your pocket and approached cautiously, moving lightly so as not to alert Jay. When you approached the aisle from whence the noise originated, you only peeked your head. You were promptly greeted with the sight of Isa and Jay, but not in any way you could have imagined.
Isa was on her knees, her head in between Jay’s legs. His pants pooled around his ankles, and his long, thin fingers were threaded through her red hair. The silver rings adorning his hands caught the moonlight and reflected it, so it looked like glittering teardrops through her long locks. Jay lazily bobbed her head back and forth, controlling the pace. The moonlight created a chiaroscuro effect on them both, painting Jay in darkness. 
He stared straight at you with an unreadable expression. His teeth were gritted, and his lips were parted slightly.  He made Isa go agonizingly slow, and she made an awful choking sound at the back of her throat as she took him in her mouth. 
You knew you should walk away, but something about it was so absurd that it was hard to look away. You had come here, partially expecting a crude prank from Jay, partially expecting Isa to surprise you with a makeover, and partially expecting Isa to join Jay in tormenting you, but not this. 
Jay’s eyes were cold and sharp as he parted his lips, licked them, then said, “Fuck, that’s so good.” He jerked her head forward onto his length, tugging at her hair roughly, and she choked again. You winced at the violent sound.
Why wouldn’t he look away? It was like he expected something from you, and you didn’t want to know what it was.
You left without another word, rubbing your eyes as you stepped away from the garish scene. He didn’t move, and Isa didn’t hear you. You shoved your socks and shoes back on and ran back out of the library, back into the spray. 
As you sprinted through the cold chill, the water seeping into your skin, you wondered why you had even shown up. How uncharacteristic of you, to get involved in the affairs of others. Why didn’t you just tell Isa that you would help her the next day? Why had you come? 
And why had Isa, or Jay, known that you would come?
When you got into bed, you tried to sleep, but the image of Isa on her knees and Jay’s eyes boring into your own wouldn’t leave your head. You tossed and turned, and that same unfamiliar feeling began to eat at your viscera. Gastric acid spilling out of your stomach, scorching your skin. 
Heat licking you in your most sensitive area.
– 
When you came into the library the next afternoon, Isa looked at you and smiled as usual. “Hey,” she said brightly. “Didn’t get much sleep last night?” 
You shook your head and sat down beside her; on Thursdays, you went through the list of those with late fees and sent them emails through the computer on the library’s main desk. “You?”
Isa gave you a mischievous look. “Mm…you could say someone kept me up last night. But I don’t kiss and tell.”
So she really had no clue. Meaning that either Jay had texted you through her phone so you could witness her giving him a blowjob, or you had made the entire thing up. 
“Um, Isa,” you said awkwardly. “Is it true that on iPhones, if you text someone Congratulations, your screen lights up with confetti? I have an Android, so…”
Isa nodded. “Yeah, it’s so cool!”
“Can you send me a text? I wanna see it.”
She pulled out her phone and quickly tapped out a text. Her screen showed that she hadn’t sent a text message to you since last week. You chose to interpret this as proof of the events of last night being completely fabricated, the result of an overactive imagination, a lack of social interaction, and sexual frustration.
“So cute,” you said as the confetti popped up on the screen. You figured you should say something.
“Isn’t it?” Isa said, sending more words. “There’s one for birthdays, and New Year’s Eve…”
As she spoke, you saw Jake and Jay walking towards you. Jay’s lips were screwed into a self-satisfied smirk, and Jake trailed him. Jay’s neck was littered with red and purple bruises, so you figured that that was why Isa was wearing a white turtleneck today. 
Isa blushed as soon as she saw Jay, and she leaned across the counter to give him a kiss. Jay’s smirk faltered as she did so, and he glanced between you and Isa. 
“You didn’t say anything?” he blurted out.
Isa frowned. “Say what?”
Jay gaped at you.  “Crazy fucking freak,” he muttered, and Isa lurched back as though she had been the one insulted. 
“Don’t be so mean,” she chided, and you felt a sudden warmth in your heart towards Isa. 
“Quit taking your shit out on her,” Jake added.
Jay looked at Jake and Isa, his head whipping around. He laughed once before stalking out of the library, creating a path through all of the students who jumped out of the way to avoid him. 
“I’m worried about him,” Isa said worriedly. “He’s been acting so strangely…”
Jake sighed and rested his hands on the desk. “Don’t know. He’s going through some stuff with his parents, so he’s been acting weirdly. He’s like this at the dorm, too. Him and Riki got into it the other night and now Riki is sleeping at Fawcett with some friend of his. It’s such a mess.”
“Sounds like a mess,” Isa said, folding her hands together and resting her head on them. “Poor Jay. I wish he would just talk to me. He must be hurting a lot.”
Christ.
After your shift at the library, you decided to eat at the Fawcett restaurant. Why not? The weather was disgusting, and you needed something substantial, something warm. You ordered something, some rice dish, and you listlessly ate  alone at one of the heavy oaken tables in the dining hall. As you ate, someone you don’t recognize slid into the seat in front of you. He had a shaved eyebrow, calculating eyes, and short black hair with blond highlights. 
“You’re her, right?” He said your name the same snide way that Jay always says it. You nodded. “I’m Riki. Riki Nishimura,” he said, holding out his hand. Unlike Jay, his hand was free from any jewelry. You stared at it, unsure of what his game was. He was the only freshman in the Karma Club, meaning that his hazing must have been particularly brutal. Even though he was young, in the same year as you, he was a Karma Club member just like the rest. 
Riki pulled his hand away and smiled at you wryly. “Jay was right about you. You really are cold.”
Jay talked about you? You didn’t think you existed to anyone outside of your direct interactions with them. How odd.
“Look,” Riki continued, zipping his sweater up as he spoke, “I just wanted to warn you.”
“About?”
Riki glanced around furtively, then stared at you. He craned his head towards you, so you leaned in as well. “He’s gotten worse recently,” Riki said in a low voice. “So they tell me, anyways. I’m a new punch, so I never got to see him ‘normal’.” He made quotation marks in the air when he said normal. “They say he was bad, but never this bad, and he won’t talk to anyone. Not even Heeseung, and they’ve been friends since they were kids.” Riki had developed eyebags, his hair was messy, and he played with his fingers as he spoke. 
“Why are you telling me this?”
Riki sighed, looking away from you. “I figure I owe it to you, I don’t know. For whatever reason, Jay hates you. No one can even understand why he dislikes you so much, but…he just keeps talking about you, saying weird shit, so I really think he might do something just…stupid, and dumb, and I don’t want that on my conscience. If he does do something… bad.”
He already has, but judging by Riki’s expression, you figured that he meant something much worse. “What should I do?”
Riki shrugged. “Don’t know. Watch out, I guess?”
“Thanks,” you said, shoveling in another bite of food. 
Riki watched you eat for a few seconds before he spoke again. “Don’t swing first.”
“What?”
“No matter what you do,” Riki said, getting out of his seat with surprising grace, “don’t buy into his bullshit. You never do anyways, and I think that that’s why he hates you so much. Everyone else indulges his dumbass ‘I’m so hard’ act…even we do, but you don’t.”
You took in his words carefully. “Thanks,” you said again, but you meant it that time.
“No problem,” Riki said. “One last thing.”
You took another bite of food and looked into his eyes. 
“If you want to come to Yeonjun’s party this Friday,” Riki said, leaning in once more (did all the Karma Club members have such little regard for personal space?), “the password is ‘fate’ to get in. It’s like an unofficial KC party. I’ll be there, so will Jake.”
Fate. What an interesting concept. “Party during a storm?”
“No school,” Riki said simply. “And, you know, it’ll be cool. I’m just gonna head there earlier with Sunghoon, but Jake is planning some stupid way to get there.”
“I’ll bet.”
Riki snorted. “You really should come. Maybe things will get interesting.”
“I hope not.”
He leaned away from you and fixed his hair. “I don’t think you’ll get a choice.”
After you did your homework, you took a nap and dreamt about the scarf. 
When you had been naive enough to linger outside, when Jay hadn’t yet made harassing you a daily habit, you had liked to knit outside. It was still September, and the weather was mild. You sat on the bleachers after your shift at the library and brought your yarn out with you. 
As you knitted, you heard footsteps behind you, crunching on the grass. Now, you could recognize those sure, solid footsteps from a mile away, but at the time you hadn’t. Generally, people didn’t approach you, so it hadn’t registered that someone was coming towards you.
“What’s that you’ve got there?” Jay hadn’t waited for an answer, plucking the scarf out of your hands just as you had finished another row.  The skein of yarn tumbled to the grass and rolled at his feet. “Is it for someone?”
You didn’t reply, your lips pursed into a thin line. “Right,” Jay had said, examining the scarf, “no one wants you, that’s right. No one wants a buzzkill that sits around, doing fuckall. Have you tried actually living? Experiencing things? Anything except wasting fucking oxygen?”
You had looked all over for that specific colour, and now he was sullying your scarf with his filthy touch. 
In real life, he had used your scissors and cut the scarf free from the yarn and walked away, laughing. But in your dream, the yarn tumbled away from you both. Winding itself around the trees, yarn strewn along the branches, choking the leaves.
You woke up covered in sweat to the sound of knocking on your door. Your bedside clock said that it was 11:00 pm. Some fucking nap.
You opened your door just a crack, trying to see what lunatic it could be. Jay stood in the hallway, grimacing at you. His eyes were ringed with dark circles, and his skin was beginning to take on a sickly pallor. The stark overhead lighting did him no favours, only highlighting his worsening appearance. 
 He grabbed you by your sweater’s sleeve and pulled you out so quickly you barely registered it. “Come along,” he said, dragging you down the hallway. “We’re going to take a little trip, you and me.”
Fighting him was futile, so you allowed yourself to be pulled away. As usual, everyone in Facwett was hanging out in someone else’s dorm, so no one saw you and Jay. He pushed the door open with one hand, the other holding onto your arm. 
Jay plunged the two of you into the rain. The deluge chilled you to the bone, and the sky was clotted with menacing nimbostratus clouds. Despite the darkness, you knew where he was taking you. It was a path you had trodden many times, the way to the Sad U library.
“Why didn’t you do anything?” Jay asked, his voice carrying over the steady rainfall. “When you saw me and Isa?”
“Like what?”
“I don’t fucking know. You could have asked questions? You could have had an actual reaction? Why’d you just stare like a freak?”
“Why’d you do it?” That was the closest you had ever come to defying him in any way, and it even surprised you. 
“Don’t fucking worry about why I did it,” he replied. Lightning flashed, and for a brief moment you could see Jay clearly. His eyebrow piercing glinted, and his eyes were completely black. “What are you looking at?” Without waiting for an answer, he continued tugging you along the grass. 
Jay hauled you up the stone steps and into the library. You didn’t know how he had gotten the doors open without a set of spare keys, until you remembered that he could have easily filched them from Isa. Maybe she gave them to him. Once you were inside, he let go of you. The two of you left large, wet puddles everywhere you stepped.  “Upstairs,” he barked, pointing at the glass staircase. “We’re going to the roof.”
Treading lightly, for your shoes were wet, you walked up all three floors. The entrance to the roof was located in a small supply closet on the leftmost side of the area. You obediently walked towards the closet, flicking the light on to find the hatch. With shaking hands, you pulled down the hatch, which unfurled the ladder leading up to the roof. “Ladies first,” Jay said, so you hiked your skirt up with one hand and climbed with the other. 
Once you got onto the roof,  you lingered by the entrance, underneath the small awning. Jay crawled up, shut the door, and jerked you into the open. You hadn’t noticed the intensity of the rain, so shocked you had been by Jay’s intrusion, but it was terrible. It beat at your face with the intensity of hail, and from just a few seconds you were already soaked. If you had brought your phone outside, it would have been destroyed, 
Jay’s hands were on you again, pulling you close to him. His eyes were wild- even in the darkness, they flashed with a primal ferocity. “We’re going to play a game,” he said, his voice loud and raggedy. The rain drowned out noise, so he leaned even closer to your ear.
“What’s the game?”
“The game,” he said, and his fingers dug into your arms, “is very simple. You give me reasons why I shouldn’t push your prude ass off the roof, and I’ll decide if they’re good enough.”
You pulled away from him to assess his expression, to see if he was joking. Nothing on his grim face suggested humour. “You’ll go to jail,” you said. 
“Jail? I can’t go to jail,” Jay said, his breath unbearably hot on your ear. “None of us can. So come on, give it a shot.”
Lily’s words rang in your head: “They straight up tried to murder a girl in the bathroom.” The library was three stories off of the ground. If he threw you off the roof, it was unlikely that you would die from the impact. It was more probable that you would be grievously injured. Paralyzed, brain damage, a slow death from your wounds, a slow death either way. Jay was the only person stopping you from reaching an infinite unknown. He held your life in his hands. 
You felt your lip tremble before you spoke. “No.”
“What?”
“No,” you said, raising your voice for the first time in ages. “I won’t beg you for anything.”
Your life flashed before your eyes in a dismal montage. Your childhood, lonely and miserable, high school a near mirror image. A life marred by solitude, harshness, and alienation, with the promise of more of the same to come. 
Jay snapped you out of your reverie with another hard shake. “What are you, fucking suicidal? You’re really ruining any potential enjoyment I could be getting out of this, you know.”
The only friends you had ever had, a group of girls in middle school, had teased you and mocked you behind your back, then to your face. Thrift shop clothes, a shy demeanor, and an inability to read the room had marked you as other long ago. An other, someone unlovable, someone born wrong, a bird with a supernumerary wing. Even if you ducked your head down, didn’t provoke anyone, the scent clung to you.
“Try. Come on. Convince me. Try!” Jay yelled now, his voice carrying over the torrent. 
Getting picked last, asked out as a joke, your only “date” having been cutting worms apart with a kid back in the second grade. You were a complete virgin. Hell, you had never even had your first kiss.
“Do something!”
Your sleeves hung from how much water they had soaked up, and your hands were slippery. You cupped Jay’s cheeks, leaned in, and kissed him gently on the lips. It was just a peck, but in your books it counted. Your hands fell away from his face, lingering at your sides.
When you pulled away, Jay was staring at you with the same unreadable expression he had had yesterday night. “I’ve never had my first kiss,” you explained, “So…” Feeling embarrassed, you looked towards the edge of the roof. From here, you could see the four separate dorms and the main campus buildings, as well as the bustling city that housed Sad U. You hadn’t explored it much, and now you never would. Tumble to the bottom, hope for death on impact. 
Jay’s voice was incredulous. “So you kissed me?”
Still averting your gaze, you shrugged. “You didn’t give me a wealth of options.”
Silence hung between the two of you like a noose. The rain poured ceaselessly, completely penetrating your clothes.
“Look at me,” Jay whispered, but you were still gazing at the city below. Cars glittered on the streets, even this late at night. Where were they going? 
“I said look at me,” he said, and his hand grabbed your chin and jerked it towards his face. “And don’t look away.”
You stared into his dark eyes; you were so close now that you could smell his breath. It smelled like bourbon and cigarettes. 
“I hate you,” he said, his thumb and index finger still holding your chin in place. “It’s beyond hatred sometimes.”
“I know,” you said.
“I think you’re pathetic. I think you’re weak.”
“I know.”
“So stop making it hard for me,” Jay said, his breathing growing uneven and erratic. 
“Making what hard for you?”
“Oh, don’t fucking play dumb,” he snapped. “You’re always doing it. You’re doing it right now.”
“I don’t do anything,” you said.
“That’s your problem,” Jay said, “you never do anything. You’re always so fucking calm, and passive, and it pisses me off. You just can’t let anything get to you, right? Nothing ever matters to you. Nothing can ever hurt you, right?” He swallowed audibly.
Your eyes drifted to the entrance to the roof. Thankfully, Jay had closed it after he had followed you up. You would have hated it if water had gotten inside.
“I said, look at me,” Jay growled, so you did.
Then he jerked your chin upwards and kissed you harshly. His arms wrapped around you, holding you tightly against him, your chest flush against his own. Two wet bodies pressed together.
You didn’t know what to do, or how to kiss back. You tried to mimic his actions, but it was impossible to keep up with him. Jay kissed you like he was punishing you for daring to touch him. Jay’s tongue worked its way into your mouth and swirled around your own tongue, dragged itself along your teeth, shoved itself down your throat. His hands gripped you as if he thought you would tumble off of the roof on your own accord if he didn’t hold onto you. One clutched your upper back, the other hand wound its way to your waist.
Jay pulled away briefly, sucking in rapid breaths, before pressing his lips firmly against yours again. He forced you down to the ground, so that you both sank to the floor of the roof. Rain had slipped into your mouths as you had caught your breath. Saliva and rainwater dribbled out of your mouths, onto your chins. You were on your knees, being consumed by Jay. One of his hands pressed against the back of your head, holding you in place. 
Thunder crashed, but Jay was relentless. You wondered if he kissed everyone like this. You wondered if he kissed Isa like this. 
Once more, he broke the kiss, panting heavily. His arms slid away from your body, leaving you with a phantom weight. Jay shakily stood up, rainwater dripping off of him as though he were one of storm clouds hovering above you. “Congratulations,” he said, “I don’t feel like killing you today.”
He left you there, looking back at him, soaked in the torrential downpour. When you touched your lips, you found that they were already starting to swell.
On Friday, classes were canceled because of the weather. It was for the best. You stared at the ceiling listlessly, your hands folded over your stomach. You hadn’t remembered going to the communal showers, or getting dressed in a nightgown, but you had done it. Your throat was sore and you were sneezing on and off. 
The sound of an incoming text broke the silence, and you reached over to your nightstand to read it. It was Isa, asking you to come over to her dorm room. You weren’t in the mood, so you texted her that you were sick. It wasn’t a lie either; pressure was building behind your skull, and you just wanted to sleep. 
Unfortunately, no one at Sad U knew how to take a hint. Ten minutes later, you heard timid rapping at your door. You groaned, shuffled to your feet, and opened the door. 
Isa was standing outside, wearing a worn Judas Priest t-shirt with purple and pink bear pajama pants. Her face was free from makeup, and her fiery hair was tugged into a loose bun. “You look bad,” she said, then winced. “Sorry.”
“I’m sick.”
“I thought you were lying just to get rid of me,” she said sheepishly. “I’ll come back some other time.”
You shook your head and beckoned her inside. All of a sudden, you didn’t want to be alone right now.  You figured you might as well get this over with now, anyways. You sat down on your bed and patted the space next to you.
Isa sat down and looked around your room, trying to find something to compliment. “It’s very…cozy in here. It’s very you,” she said finally, turning to face you.
“Thank you,” you said, stretching out your neck. “What’s up?”
Isa sighed and tugged at the hem of Jay’s shirt. “It’s Jay,” she said finally. Of course. It was always Jay. “No one’s seen him since last night.”
“Maybe he’s on campus somewhere, like Ri-,”
“No, no one has seen him.” Isa screwed her face up in frustration. “He just disappeared.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah,” Isa said bitterly. “Oh. So, I was wondering…if you had, I dunno, seen him? I know that you guys…know each other, so I was wondering if maybe he had said something.”
“No,” you said immediately. “No, he didn’t.” What could you say? Yeah, your pseudo-boyfriend threatened to kill me, we made out on the rooftop, and then he disappeared?
“Oh, okay,” Isa said, her voice faltering. She sniffled, but before you could make a feeble attempt at comforting her, she smiled. “Gosh. It’s such an ugly day, and all my friends are over at Stoker right now with their boyfriends. I’d go over there, but the rain is so bad…”
It was clear that Isa wanted someone to hang around, so maybe you could help each other. Just once. “I saved some movies on my laptop before the storm, if you wanted to, you know…”
Isa wiped her eyes. “What? You want to watch a movie with me?”
What were you doing? “If you want.”
 “Yeah. Yeah, sure, what movies?”
“Uh, Oldboy and Lady Vengeance…”
Isa brightened and clapped her hands. “Oh, no way. I loved Lady Vengeance. I haven’t seen Oldboy, though.”
You smiled slowly. “I haven’t seen either of them. Which should we watch first?”
“Oldboy came out first, I think,” Isa said, taking her hair out of her bun and fluffing it out. “So we should watch that…then Lady Vengeance.”
Watching a movie with someone had seemed tedious to you, an unneeded distraction. Why would you want to hear someone else talk while you were trying to focus? But for some reason, Isa pointing at your small laptop screen, making idle comments, and at one point going on a snack run and coming back with a small bounty of treats was actually enjoyable. The storm wailed outside, pounding at your window.
At one point, halfway through Lady Vengeance, Isa put her head on your shoulder. Awkwardly, you patted her smooth hair and she nuzzled into you. 
So this was what it was like to have a friend. 
“Hey,” you said quietly, “are you going to the party at Yeonjun’s?”
Isa nodded, her cheek rubbing against your shoulder. “I think I might, yeah. Yeah, my friends have been trying to get invited, but it’s pretty hard. And apparently there’s like a list of invitees, so you can’t just…go. Jay was supposed to take me, but…” her voice trailed off.
“I got invited. Formally,” you said, “so maybe we could go together?”
Isa lifted her cheek off of your shoulder so she could look at you directly, a smile slowly spreading across her pretty face. “Really?” 
“Yeah, and…” you swallowed thickly. “You could maybe…help me get ready?”
The sheer ferocity of the squeal that Isa had emitted could have powered the school in case the bad weather wrecked the back-up generators. “I’ll call Jake so he can pick us up,” Isa said, pulling her phone out. “He’s staying behind, so we can meet him in a few hours…”
“He’ll drive us?”
Isa looked at you slyly. “Not quite.”
“It’s perfectly safe,” Jake reassured you. He was behind the wheel of a golf cart, his teeth gleaming in the dark. had parked outside of Fawcett, positioned under a large tree to evade the worst of the rain. 
“Won’t the rain wreck the cart?” you asked. At Isa’s behest, you were wearing a plastic poncho that covered you from head to toe, speaking through a small mouth flap. She had bought them in anticipation for the awful weather, and she would not have you wreck the makeup she had meticulously painted on your face. The dress you were wearing was one she had chosen from your closet. She had wanted to do raw hem the dress to make it look “grunge”, but Jake had pounded on your door, yelling for you guys to get out. So she had hurried you out, and you hadn’t even had the chance to grab your phone. Strange how eager she was to please him, even though they seemed to be on equal footing. 
Jake waved away your concerns. “It’ll make it to Yeonjun’s. Probably.” He could scarcely be heard amidst the thunder crashing in the distance. 
“How come you didn’t leave earlier? I heard the others went to Yeonjun’s a few hours earlier,” Isa said, adjusting her own poncho.
Jake hesitated, then whispered, “I thought Jay would come back. Wanted to be at Stoker in case he showed.”
Isa’s face crumpled for a few seconds, before she took a deep breath and steeled herself. “Come on,” she yelled, grabbing your hand and leading you into the golf cart. “Aw, man, my ass is wet.”
“That’s a hurricane party for you,” Jake said. With a whoop, he started the golf cart and sped away from Fawcett.
The main entrance to Sad U was closed off by a large, ostentatious black gate, but there were other ways to get off campus. Namely, there was a winding path that led from the warehouse into the woods surrounding the university that led outside. Jake maneuvered the golf cart through the powerful winds, hollering as he did so. 
“You drive like shit,” Isa screamed, clinging to you. 
“You try driving a golf cart through a hurricane,” Jake yelled, entering the forest. There was a brief reprieve from the winds, but branches, twigs, and pebbles still whipped around your head. You had to dodge constantly to avoid a barrage of debris. 
Somehow, Jake had wheeled the golf cart onto a side road. “Do you know where you’re going?” Isa asked warily.
“Yeah,” Jake said, “obviously. I’ve been to Yeonjun’s a bunch of times.”
“Are you sure?” The golf cart squeaked miserably as it rumbled down the concrete. 
“Yes, I’m sure! Get off my ass!”
“We’re in a golf cart in a Category 5 hurricane, someone needs to be on your ass.”
“This isn’t even a Category 2 hurricane. This is nothing. You know what we get in Australia? We get willy-willies. You wouldn’t know shit about that, would you?”
You started laughing. You couldn’t remember the last time you had done so, but it felt amazing. Clutching your stomach, you rested your head on Isa’s shoulder. Isa looked at you, then glanced at Jake, and they joined in too. A merry band of lunatics, cackling in the middle of a storm.
“We’re so fucked, Wednesday Addams is laughing,” Jake said, letting out a wheezing laugh. 
“It’s a good omen,” Isa suggested, “like a black cat walking under ladders.”
“13 mirrors in a funhouse breaking,” you said, unable to stop giggling. Maybe you were delirious. 
Jake snickered and continued driving. The storm hadn’t let up, but he managed to navigate the golf cart onto the sidewalk of a residential area - quite the upscale neighborhood at that. The houses looked more like dorm buildings with how large and decadent they were. 
“I thought it’d be a gated community,” Isa said, still holding onto you. 
“Yeonjun’s going through this weird Twitter socialist phase,” Jake said, “so he’s like, ‘gated communities are for the bourgeoise’, but he owns a shit ton of Rick.”
You glanced at Isa. “Rick?”
“Rick Owens,” she explained.
Just then, you heard a distinct gurgling noise coming from the back of the golf cart. “You guys hear that?” 
“I can’t hear anything in this weather,” Isa said, and as the words left her mouth the golf cart made a loud hissing noise. 
“Get out!” Jake yelled. “The battery is waterlogged!” Isa helped to pull you out of the cart, and the three of you watched the golf cart smoke before the rain snuffed any remaining heat. 
“Jake,” Isa began, her words punctuated by a thunder-clap, “why would you even take a golf cart to Yeonjun’s in the middle of a storm?”
Jake spread his arms angrily, but all he could offer was a meager, “The vibes?”
“The vibes,” she said, exasperated. “The vibes.” 
“How far is Yeonjun’s?” you asked, still wired from the strange euphoria you had felt earlier.
Jake shrugged, running his hands through his wet locks. “Like…five minutes away?”
“We should run,” you suggested. “What else can we do?” 
Jake opened his mouth, but with another loud thunderclap, he turned on his heel and started sprinting. Expletives spilled out of his mouth as quickly as he moved. Isa took your hand and you ran in a madcap sprint to Yeonjun’s house. It was almost surreal; every minute, there was a bright flash of lightning, and you could see everything in complete clarity. 
Your lower half was completely wet, you were holding hands with the “girlfriend” of the guy who had tormented you for months, and you were running towards a party with some of the most obnoxious people at your university, including his best friend. 
“Fate,” you murmured.
“What?” Isa yelled, pulling her poncho tightly around herself. 
“Fate,” you said, a little louder.
“Yeah, that’s the password,” Jake said, running a little ahead of you and Isa. “Who told you?”
“Riki.”
Isa let out a slight laugh. “You know Riki, too? You don’t tell me anything.”
You laughed, too. A few minutes later, you were in front of Yeonjun’s sprawling mansion. From what you could tell, it was around three stories. Lights shone from all of the windows besides the ones on the highest floor.  No cars in the driveway, but the ten car garage probably fit all of them neatly. The wind could batter this fortress all it wanted, but the brick and stucco building would probably hold up in a flood. You didn’t want to know how someone who had graduated university not two years prior had been able to afford such a nice place. He was an ex-Karma Club member- the president, in fact - so Lord knows what he was capable of. 
You could hear loud trap music with rapid 808s playing from inside, accompanied by frenzied screams. The yard, which was currently being pummeled by a torrent of water, was understandably empty as well. Jake walked up to the door and rapped three quick knocks using the brass knocker. Someone opened it, a young man with a cat-like smile. He looked at Jake, then at you and Isa.
“Password?” 
Jake groaned. “Jungwon, you little shit. Don’t be annoying.”
“That’s crazy,” Jungwon said, shoving his hands into the front pocket of his bright orange hoodie. “None of those words sounded like the password.”
Jake groaned again, leaned in, and whispered the password into Jungwon’s ear. 
“Enter,” Jungwon said, gesturing Jake inside with a flourish. Jake gave Jungwon the finger and walked inside, calling, “I’ll be in the living room” behind his shoulder. 
Isa walked up next. She gave Jungwon a little kiss on the cheek and said the password. She turned towards you and pointed at the right, presumably at the living room. Then she disappeared inside as well, already taking off her poncho. 
Jungwon looked at you expectantly, so you walked down the stone path, up the steps, and stood in the doorway. “Fate,” you said. 
Jungwon nodded at you, jutting his bottom lip out slightly. “Nice to finally meet you,” he said appreciatively. “We’ve heard so much about you.”
“Anything good?”
You both stared at each other blankly. “You’d better get inside,” Jungwon said, gesturing you in. “In, in. It’s raining cats and dogs and Jakes. Get it? Because he’s an animal.”
“Shut the fuck up,” you heard Jake call from up the stairs and Jungwon wandered over to him, still laughing. Your eyes adjusted to the sudden light.
The scene was something out of a music video. To your right was a winding, wooden staircase with ornate iron balusters. Clusters of people crowded on it, passing around a tired joint or just talking. To your left, you could see a small room that had been stripped of its furniture so people could have space to dance. Directly beside it was a small bar, replete with various bottles of alcohol along with a small cooler that rested on the counter. Riki was standing near the bar, and when he caught your eyes he stalked over to you.
Riki grinned at you as you peeled off your sopping wet poncho and jacket, resting them on a nearby coat hook. “You came,” he said quietly. 
“I did,” you said.
He walked back to the bar, and after a moment’s hesitation you followed him. “Do you drink?” he asked, pawing through the open cooler. 
“Not often,” you said, leaning against the counter, careful to avoid touching an odd puddle of liquid. 
“Didn’t think so,” Riki said. He pulled a blue Calypso lemonade out of the cooler and cracked it open, handing it to you. You received it reluctantly, swirling the liquid around. “Don’t worry, I didn’t spike it. That’s more of a Sunoo thing.”
You took a small, tentative sip. “Is it?
“Nothing serious,” Riki said, gulping his own Monster and wiping his mouth. “Just know that if you ever see a group of people mysteriously getting the shits at once, it’s Sunoo.”
“Is he here?”
“Yeah. Why do you think they have me watching the drinks? When he gets bored at a party he gets antsy.”
“Hm.” You continued drinking and surveyed the area. It was almost claustrophobic, seeing so many people dancing and writhing around. Thanks to Isa, you didn’t stand out, although you wondered if anyone would have even cared. 
Riki nudged your arm with his elbow lightly. “First party?” 
You nodded, clutching your small glass bottle like a lifeline. “A lot of people.”
Riki snorted. “Nah, wait till you see upstairs.”
“Upstairs?”
“Yeah,” Riki said, jerking his thumb towards the steps. “That’s where the living room is.”
You gaped at him, glancing at the large, open space beside you two. “That isn’t the living room?”
A laugh escaped Riki’s lips and he nudged you again. “This is so fun. Come on.” Riki abandoned his post at the bar and jostled you. You got to your feet and looked at him warily. As he pushed you up the stairs, helping you wind past the dazed partygoers sitting on the steps, he said, “You’re wet.”
“Jake drove us here in a golf cart.”
Riki laughed loudly, his voice echoing over the music coming from upstairs. “He was serious about that? What the fuck? We could have driven you guys in Yeonjun’s all-terrain truck.”
You got to the top of the steps and pulled at your wet dress. “He said he did it for the-,”
“Vibes,” Riki finished, swallowing the last of his Monster. He crushed the can and tossed it on the floor, where it clattered unceremoniously. “He’s an idiot sometimes.”
“So I’m learning,” you said. 
The red LED lights blaring from the expansive living room on the far left painted Riki’s face with a devilish glow. He put his arm around your shoulder and laughed again. “We should be friends. You’re funny.”
“You’d be my first one,” you said, walking towards the party with some apprehension.
“Your first? What about Jay?” Riki asked innocently. “I thought you guys were best friends.” You glared at him and he snickered. 
“Come on, let’s dance.”
“Wait,” you said, tugging on his sleeve. 
“What?”
You looked at the throng of people dancing freely. You could see Isa’s flowing mass of red hair in the middle of the room, and Jungwon’s bright orange hoodie led you to Jake doing some trendy little dance. You could see the other members of the Karma Club interspersed throughout the room - Sunghoon and Sunoo were in a corner, half-dancing and half gossiping. You didn’t see Heeseung, or anyone who matched his description. Everyone there, regardless of what they were doing, looked like they were having fun.  They were shouting the lyrics to a song you didn’t know. 
“I can’t dance,” you said finally.
Riki stared at you. “You think any of them can dance? Look at Jake.”
“Well, I-,”
Riki put both of his hands on your shoulders and looked you in the eyes. “You need to stop thinking.”
“Stop thinking?”
“Yes. Stop thinking. Just do what feels right.”
“I won’t know any songs.”
“Doesn’t matter. Every song has a beat, you just follow it.”
“But …”
“I’m about done with this conversation,” Riki said, and he pulled you inside of the living room. Someone with lanky hair was manning a turntable, holding up his red solo cup as he fiddled with dials. Bodies were pressed together, and the room smelled like sweat and weed and perfume.
Riki started to move to the beat, so you decided to follow him, still holding your Calypso. He looked at you and laughed. “Just like that,” he said. The two of you danced at the edge of the party together, and it was comforting realizing that no one was paying attention. You closed your eyes and tried to feel the beat; the music was so loud that the floors seemed to reverberate. 
You heard someone call your name, and when you opened your eyes you saw Isa running towards you. Her smile was lopsided and she was laughing a little too hard. “I’m about to start rolling,” she said giddily. “Took like 150 mg. Come dance!”
Isa suddenly possessed the strength of an ox, because she was able to yank you into the center of the room. 
Jake yelled your name and hit a dance move you didn’t recognize. You copied him, the same way you did Riki. “Aye,” Jake said approvingly, “Wednesday’s got moves.”
“I taught her everything she knows,” Riki said. He embraced Jake in a half-hug and Jake ruffled his hair.
“I’m gonna teach her how to twerk,” Isa said, tugging your arm. “Come here…” 
You tried to pry her hand off of you. “No, no, no…”
“Teach me, Isa,” Jake said playfully, and he dropped into a squat and rattled his bones. Isa made a retching noise and looked away. 
An unfamiliar voice gasped, and you whirled your head to see who it was.“Oh, God. Who got Jake popping his pussy?” It was a girl wearing a black beanie with a cross on it, a thin tank top, and baggy camo pants. 
Isa smiled. “Gigi!”
“Gigi” and Isa kissed each other on the cheeks. “Girl,” Gigi said, rolling her eyes, “someone gave my man an edible and said that it was only 10 mg. Tell me why he’s in the bathroom right now talking about ‘they’re after me’?”
Riki’s eyes lit up. “Heeseung is vulnerable?”
“Don’t scare him too bad,” Gigi said, but Riki was already speeding away. She sighed and bit the inside of her cheek. “That boy is evil, Isa.”
“You say that like every Karma Club member isn’t insane,” Isa said, pulling her hair out of her face and whipping it backwards.
Jake finally got up and frowned, standing beside Isa. You lingered on her other side; Gigi’s sudden appearance had made you feel a bit nervous. “I’m not that bad,” Jake said with a slight pout. 
“Please.” Gigi scoffed and adjusted her beanie. “That Mina shit was pretty bad.”
For the first time since you had known him, Jake’s face was completely serious. The air had become fraught with tension, and you realized that the three of them had completely stopped dancing. 
“Oops,” she said, holding her hand up to her lips. “Did I say something?”
Isa was chewing on her bottom lip, and Jake was staring at Gigi the same way that Jay looked at other people. Like he could kill them.
“Let’s not talk about that,” Jake mumbled, looking away from Gigi. He glanced at you, then back at the ground. 
Gigi followed his gaze to you, and she gave you a clinical, detached once-over. “Who’s this?”
“This is our Wednesday,” Isa said, rubbing your shoulder. She told Gigi your name, and a hint of recognition flickered on her face. 
“Oh, that’s you,” Gigi said, nodding slowly. “I’m Giselle. Heeseung’s brought you up.”
What was there even to talk about? “Oh.”
“Based on what Heeseung said, I didn’t think you’d show up to one of these,” Gigi said coolly. 
“Jake said he’d buy me smoothies for a week if I came,” you replied drily. 
“No, I didn’t,” Jake protested, but his wide, puppy-like smile returned. “Quit lying on me.”
“No, you definitely did,” Isa said, lightly pushing him. “I heard you say it. You said you’d get me a wrap from Stoker’s caf, too.”
“Fine, fine,” Jake said, holding his hands up. “Smoothies for a week for Wednesday and a wrap for her friend Ariel.”
The song switched, some rap song you didn’t know, but Giselle shrieked, clutching Isa. “Girl, this is my song,” she screamed. “Just got some top from a stripper bitch, she from Kankakee…”
Giselle and Isa started dancing, with Giselle gesturing at Isa passionately. You looked at Jake, who moved his arms in a ridiculous, exaggerated way. You smiled and followed his movements, to his amusement. 
“You been getting close to Riki?” he asked, tousling his hair. 
“I guess,” you replied, trying to mimic a dance you had seen in a music video. “I’ve only known him for two days, though.”
Jake nodded. “He seems like he likes you.”
“He’s nice.”
“Yeah, he’s a good kid,” Jake said, and you became aware of how close he had gotten to you. When had that happened?
“You say kid like Riki and I aren’t the same age.”
Jake stopped moving momentarily, and a shy smile spread across his face. You felt a blush creep over your cheeks, and you were thankful for the cover of darkness. “Well, you don’t seem like you’re the same age as Riki,” he said softly. “You seem a lot more…mature?”
“I don’t feel mature,” you admit and you wonder why you even said it. 
“You are,” Jake said, and you saw his hand reaching out towards you, towards your face. Before he could touch you, you felt someone push you. 
“Why aren’t you dancing?” Riki said, giggling. “You guys look like losers.” He patted your back and went over to Jake, shaking him. Jake playfully wrestled Riki, and as you looked on you swayed your hips ever-so-slightly. Now that you were a little more comfortable, you were starting to have fun.
“Okay, get it,” Gigi said. You turned and she was giving you a strange smile. Isa stretched her hand towards you, and without a moment of delay, you took it. 
Even though you didn’t know the words, even though you didn’t know anyone, you still danced.  Jake was on your right, Isa was on your left, and the six of you were in a group, letting loose. Isa let her head hang back and excitedly moved her body to the beat. Riki was a surprisingly good dancer, freestyling along with every song that came on. Jake wasn’t far behind him, either. Last week, you couldn’t have imagined yourself doing this, not with these people. 
“Let’s go,” Jake yelled before a beat drop, and Riki pushed your head down so you would headbang. You smacked his arm, a gesture you had witnessed girls do to guys. It felt good to do something normal like that, to express your familiarity with someone.
You didn’t know how long you had spent in the living room, but eventually you grew tired. You tapped Jake on the shoulder. “Where’s the bathroom?”
“Shit,” Jake said apologetically. “They’re probably all occupied right now. You really need to go?”
You shook your head. “Just need to rest for a little. I’m tired.”
“Sure,” he said. “You wanna go to a bedroom?”
Resting on a soft, plush bed and nuzzling into goose-down pillows sounded like a great plan to you. You nodded your assent. As you left, Isa got a hold of your jacket’s sleeve. “You okay?”
“Not used to this many people,” you explained, and you could have sworn you heard Giselle scoff. Whatever.  Isa nodded sympathetically and gave you a long hug. You tapped her back awkwardly before pulling away. “Have fun,” you said softly. 
“Don’t have to tell me twice,” Isa said, playfully hitting your arm before turning back around.
Jake winded his way out of the crowd with you in tow. He took you up another flight of spiral stairs, then down a hallway decorated with tasteful, if not somewhat generic, artwork. He knocked on a door at the end of the hall, and when he didn’t hear anything, he opened the door. Jake flicked the light on, surveying the room. It was a simple, spacious bedroom; the bed had a red and gold quilt, the floor was dark hardwood, and the curtains were drawn shut. “This place is so big,” Jake said admiringly. “If the apocalypse were to happen, I’d come here and just hide out.”
“You’d get looted,” you said, entering the bedroom. You took your shoes off at the door and walked over to the bed. Putting your calypso down on the nightstand, you laid down on top of the sheets. “Yeonjun won’t mind if I sleep in one of his beds?”
Jake scoffed and sat down on the edge of the bed, beside you. “Sleeping is probably the tamest thing people are going to do in his bedrooms,” Jake said, looking down at you. “You’re fine.”
“Oh.” With that, you crawled under the covers, which were deliciously soft. The pillows were cold and crisp, and you breathed out a contented sigh. 
“You must be tired,” Jake said. “First college party, right?”
“First party,” you replied, suddenly feeling embarrassment over your lackluster social life. 
Jake shook his head in disbelief. “You’re so chill, I don’t get why you weren’t popular in high school.”
“Ask Jay,” you deadpanned. “He could give you a few reasons.”
“Jay’s a fucking…” Jake seemed to catch himself, and he looked at the ceiling before staring back down at you. “I love him, but I don’t understand him. I don’t know why he treats you like that.” 
Why do you let him treat me like that? The words clogged in your throat. You were being unfair. Jake had been telling Jay to stop recently, had been trying to help you. It wasn’t like he could stop Jay, anyways. Jay always did what he wanted. 
You must have looked strange, because Jake bit his lip in worry. “Are you sure you’re all right?”
“I caught a little cold yesterday,” you said. Jake touched the back of his hand to your forehead, and you were surprised by how chilly his touch was. 
“How’d you manage that?” Jake said in a low murmur. He moved his hand to your neck, just under your chin. 
“Went outside.”
“And why did you go outside?”
You gave him a small smile. “The vibes.”
Jake chuckled. “You can be so funny,” he said. “You can be so…”
You never got to hear what else Jake thought you were, because he had leaned down and planted his plush lips onto yours, kissing you softly. A dulcet sweet kiss, as gentle as dandelion fluff. When he pulled away, his eyes lingered on your lips. “Sorry,” Jake said quietly, moving his hand from your neck. 
You didn’t say anything, and you felt as though you had reverted back to the you from Monday. 
“Sorry,” Jake said again, “I don’t know why I did that.” He hesitated, then whispered, “Do you want me to go?” 
You bobbed your head up and down, almost imperceptibly. Jake drew a sharp intake of breath, nodded, then stood up. “I hope you feel better,” he muttered before leaving the bedroom. 
You didn’t. You couldn’t even fall asleep. You laid there, listening to the sounds of the rain and the bass kicks coming from the living room. Your eyes were closed, but your mind was racing. 
Bringing your fingers to your lips, you traced the soft skin. Jake had kissed you like you were something fragile, something that needed special care. He was attractive, friendly, and treated you far better than any other man in your life ever had. 
So why were you thinking about Jay? 
It was only a seven minute drive to Yeonjun’s from Sad U, which would be a nearly two hour long walk. Even if the weather cleared up, it would be an arduous trek, and without your phone, you would probably get lost. 
There was no point in trying to rest, but you didn’t want to see Jake right now. You didn’t want to confront his feelings, your feelings, or your lack thereof. Maybe you should go downstairs, see if you could scrounge up some alcohol. Drink yourself into a stupor and black out. 
So you got out of bed, shoved your shoes on, and headed out the door. As you walked down the hallway, you bumped into Riki, who was carrying a bottle of something with two red solo cups. “Jake wants to drink all of a sudden,” he explained. “But he’s too much of a fair maiden to get it himself. Annoying. It’s a crime for me to even be touching this shit.”
“I want to leave,” you blurted out. 
Riki stared at you. “What happened?”
“Nothing. I don’t know.” 
Shifting the items in his hands, he sighed and pulled his phone out of his pocket. He checked the time, then looked at you gravely. “Weather’s supposed to clear up in 3 hours,” Riki said finally. “I can take someone’s car.”
“They wouldn’t mind?”
“If they minded, then they shouldn’t have put me on key duty,” Riki said, shaking his flannel’s pocket. You heard the sound of keys jangling together.
“You really are evil,” you said approvingly. 
“How do you think I got into the club?” Riki smiled, then sighed. “I’m gonna go take care of Jake. You gonna come dance again?”
“Don’t think so.” 
“All right,” Riki said. “Which room are you in?”
“Up the stairs…down the hall, the leftmost room.”
“I’ll meet you there in a few hours, then,” Riki said, and he prepared to leave.
“Wait.” When Riki turned to face you, crading the bottle of alcohol under his arms, you swallowed.
“Why are you so nice to me?”
Riki snorted. “Don’t say depressing, orphan ass shit like that. You piss Jay off, you don’t suck his dick, you don’t get into dumbass slapfights, and you’re funny. That’s all I need.”
“I thought Karma Club members would sort of…hate the same people.”
“Yeah, a lot of people make assumptions about us,” Riki said, irritation clear on his face. “They don’t know shit.” When you remain quiet, he heads over to the living room.
Three hours pass by, trickling like molasses. You go in and out of sleep, dreams intermingling with daydreams. You think about the scarf, about Jay, the smoothies Jake promised you, about your classes, about how five days could culminate into something like this. Lying in a stranger’s bed. You think about how, if Jay hadn’t fiercely kissed you on the rooftop, Jake would have been your first kiss. But if Jay hadn’t kissed you, would you have accepted Isa’s invitation to hang out? Would you have come to this party?
Riki knocked on your door. “It’s open,” you said, and he stepped inside.
“Jake’s acting stupid,” Riki said, gesturing for you to get up. “Fighting with Gigi because she brought up the Mina thing.” 
You shuffled over to his side, and together you descended the winding staircase. 
“I take it you don’t know what the Mina thing is?” Riki asked. 
You shook your head. 
“Jake would probably hate it if I told you,” Riki began, holding the door open for you, “so I’ll tell you.
You slipped through the door; the wind was weaker, and the rain came in a light shower instead of the downpour through which you had traversed. “What’s with you?”
Riki laughed, striding over to the massive garage. He pressed a button and it folded itself into the wall. “I like starting shit.”
“Fair.”
The two of you got into someone’s car, with heated leather seats and fuzzy dice in the mirror. “So, the Mina thing was pretty straightforward,” he began, pulling out of the driveway. “From what I understand, Jake hooked up with a girl when she was drunk. Really drunk. She said it was assault, he said that it was consensual.” 
You were surprised by the blase nature with which he relayed this information, but you figured being in the Karma Club took a lot of grit. 
“She tried to take him to court, but Jake…well, he’s rich. Really rich. She never got a rape kit, apparently didn’t know they existed, so she had no evidence. The only thing was…” Riki squinted at the road. “Fuck, I missed a turn…doesn’t matter. Anyways, the only thing was that her back was fucked up.”
“Fucked up?”
“Scratches, bruises and shit. Jake said that she liked it rough, and I never got to see it myself, but one of her old friends did. She didn’t believe that Jake raped her, but it looked ugly. Anyways, then she got known as the girl that cried rape. Everyone sort of just ran with it. Then she tried to kill herself.”
Riki said it so casually, you nearly didn’t register that he had said it. “Pardon me?”
“She tried to overdose on something, I don’t know what. It didn’t work, she got her stomach pumped. And then she left the school. It was the middle of last semester, so I have no clue how she completed her exams. Probably didn’t. No one knows where she is now. No one knew about the attempt, except for the KC members at the time.”
“How is that possible?”
“Well,” Riki said, turning onto Decelis Street, where Sadame University was located. “She had lost all of her friends, so it’s not like they would have cared. Sorry if that sounds like a dick thing to say, but it’s true. And the people who did find her, well…they weren’t going to tell anyone.”
“Why? Who found her?”
Riki was silent as he pulled up in front of the tall, imposing gate. “You can get in, right? There’s a few entrances that lead inside, or you could climb over.”
“Yeah,” you said, unbuckling your seatbelt. “I should be fine.”
“Good.”
“Thanks for driving me.”
“It was Jay,” he said quietly. “Jay found her. She was from Fawcett, and he found her in the girls’ bathroom.”
Staggering through the halls of Fawcett, which were eerily quiet (quite a few students had gone home for the weekend, anticipating the storm. The rest were probably in Stoker, enjoying the proximity to the KC without stirring their ire. 
It was too much to think about, too much to figure out. Jake had either committed a crime, or he was being unfairly framed. Either way, the girl had tried to kill herself, and Jay had found her. Why would he be in the Fawcett bathroom? None of it made sense, and you were so worn out, you could hardly bring yourself to think about it.
You jammed your key into the lock, but you realized that the door was already open. That’s right. Isa had rushed you outside, so you hadn’t had the chance to lock your door. When you cracked the door ajar, you saw someone lying on your bed, reading one of your books. 
Jay.
This was the longest Friday night of your life. 
The door made a creaking noise as you pushed it all the way open, and he turned to you and smiled. It was a Duchenne smile, devoid of any joy. His hair, which was normally styled, fell limply into his eyes.  He set the book down on your nightstand, got to his feet, and pulled you inside lightly. As he let you go, he closed the door and locked it with an unpropitious click. 
“Where were you?” Jay asked, leaning against the door. He crossed his arms over his loose black button-up and tilted his head.
“Yeonjun’s,” you said.  You still felt weak from the last 6 hours, so you rested your hand on your nightstand for support as you stood in front of him. 
“Oh, Yeonjun’s,” he said, raising his eyebrows. “How was it? Fun?”
The benign nature of his questioning only made you feel more perturbed. “It was okay,” you said. “Loud. Not as many people as I thought.”
“You know how it is,” Jay continued. “KC parties are always exclusive.” His voice didn’t have its usual arrogant, loud tone, the one that commanded attention. Now he spoke in a slow, borderline sensual drawl.
“Why didn’t you go?”
Jay shrugged and kicked himself off of the door, standing upright. He shoved his hands into his pockets. “You may not know this because you don’t have any friends, but hanging around the same people for so long gets boring. I got sick of it, all their bullshit. Besides, KC parties are all the same. You go there, you listen to the shittiest house music, you smoke cat piss because it’s Heeseung’s favourite, you grind on some sluts, you fuck one or two of them, you have to kick their drunk asses out, you go home, then you fight the urge to kill yourself, pen in your jugular.”
“Sounds like a great time.”
Jay laughed humourlessly. “I didn’t know you could make jokes. You’re just full of surprises. Going to parties - KC parties, no less! - wearing makeup…you fuck anyone?”
Your eyes widened. “What?”
“Did you fuck anyone? Seems like you were looking to get fucked tonight.” Jay took a small step towards you.
“No,” you said, thinking about the kiss. Both of them.
“Really?” Jay stepped even closer. “Not even Jake? He has a weird thing for you, you know. Probably thinks he can dick the mute out of you. I’m surprised he didn’t try anything. But then, he’s always been kind of a pussy, though.”
You stayed silent, backing up. He wasn’t wearing his usual cologne today, so his natural scent wafted into your nose. It was woodsy and a little spicy. 
“Back to the silent treatment? You’re killing me.”
Your hand brushed against the book he had been reading. “Why are you here, Jay?” 
“I missed you,” Jay said sarcastically. “I just had to come see you. Why, you didn’t want to see me? Are you scared of me now?”
You shook your head, stepping back again. Your calves hit the cool wrought iron frame of your bed, and you realize that there’s nowhere left to go. 
Jay advanced upon you, until he was hovering over you like a specter. “Of course you aren’t. Nothing I can do can frighten you, right?”
“No.”
Anger contorted his features into a vicious snarl, and he pushed you onto the bed. Yourlegs hit the edge of the bed, and you winced from the impact. Furious hands groped all over the front of your body, as if he were attempting to touch every part of you at once. Jay’s lips pressed onto yours, his teeth clashing against yours. This kiss lacked the desperation and  hopelessness of last time. Now, his kisses were vicious attacks, wet and hot. His hips rutted against your crotch, like he was trying to fuck you through the layers of clothing.
Jay pulled away, gasping. His lips were covered in his own slick saliva. “Why aren’t you fighting back? Why do you let me do whatever I want to you?”
He’s pinned your arms against your sides, so all you can do is look into his eyes. Your voice came out more strongly than you had intended. “You’ll do it if I fight back or not. You always do whatever you want. I’m not strong enough to stop you, so why bother?”
Jay growled with indignation. “You’re pathetic. You’re weak.” He kissed you again, as if trying to devour you. One of his rough hands slid up your dress, the other kneading your breasts through the thin fabric. 
You didn’t kiss him back. You didn’t squirm. You laid there, pressed into your bed. Jay forced his tongue into your mouth and let you choke on it. The hand had disappeared up your dress was now sliding your panties down, down your legs. Pushing your dress up to reveal your naked pussy, Jay broke the kiss, a string of saliva connecting your lips. He looked into your eyes. 
“You’re mine,” he said, unbuckling his belt. “You know that?” 
The words sent a flurry of goosebumps across your body. “What?”
“I said, you’re mine.” Jay held his belt in his hands and glanced at your wrists, then your face. He tossed the belt to the side and pushed your dress even further up your body, giving him access to your tummy. He spread his hand across it, rubbing it in a circular motion.
“You hate me.”
“I despise you.”
“Why would you want to have someone you hate? That doesn’t make any sense.”
“It doesn’t have to,” Jay said before spitting into his right hand. His other hand yanked his zipper down and took his cock out. It was almost scary to look at: long and angry with a reddened tip and a slight curve. He pushed your legs apart harshly. As if it were a chore, Jay stroked his cock a few times as he lined himself up with your pussy. 
With a grunt, he plunged himself inside of you, piercing through your thin membrane ruthlessly. You bit your lip to stop yourself from crying out, but it was painful. It was a searing heat that licked at your walls, down to your core. Jay didn’t bottom out, thankfully, but he was already lingering dangerously close to your cervix. He was already panting, his hands gripping your hips as he tried to catch himself. His silver cross necklace dangled in your face, so close you could twirl it around your finger. 
Just as soon as you were getting used to the strange feeling of having a cock jammed in your cunt, you heard Jay’s husky voice. “Fight back,” he whispered before pulling out and slamming back inside of you. Your eyes were trained on Jay’s, and he captured and held your gaze. He thrusted again, harshly, and the slick noise made you realize that you were wet. “You’re just letting me do this,” Jay continued, starting to develop a deep, irregular pace. Quarter notes of hard snaps of his hips, allegrisimo sixteenth-notes of incessant pounding. “Letting me take this pussy. Come on, struggle or I’ll think you want it.”
Jay continued slamming into you, leaving little half moons on your hips from his fingernails. His head dipped down to your neck, and he bit and sucked on a small spot near its base. A hickey. Jay licked a stripe up to the right of your neck and marked you there as well.
You felt wildly conflicted. You didn’t want this, you didn’t ask for this, and it felt odd. Yet at the same time, you felt so full. Every time he drove his cock into you, you felt like you would tear apart. Pain and pleasure coalesced into something you couldn’t comprehend.
Jay’s words devolved into grunting as he thrusted faster and faster. Somehow, the look on his face didn’t seem to display pleasure, or even schadenfreude. He stared at you through darkened eyes and his nose was scrunched.
“You’d let me do anything to you,” Jay said, almost accusingly. “Anything.” With another thrust, you feel something hot and fluid fill your womb, and soon the acrid smell of urine floats into your nostrils. 
Jay stares into your face, waiting for a reaction, searching your face for any weakness. When he finds none, he lets out a strangled groan of frustration and begins slamming into you wildly. He lifts your legs up, gripping them by your thighs, and takes your pussy with the aggression of an animal. “I made you a piss-whore, a dirty fucking piss whore. Aren’t you mad? Aren’t you angry? Are you a fucking robot?” He punctuated his insults with angry thrusts; you could hear the sticky amalgamation of piss and your own cum making squelching noises. You reach for the sheets beneath your hands and search for any purchase. 
Jay let out one final, irate grunt and spilled inside of you, shooting his cum all the way to your cervix. He dropped your legs back onto the bed and rested on top of you, your head between his arms. You had seen a lot of expressions on Jay’s face: anger, frustration, pride, sadistic glee, but this was something else. Something you couldn’t read. You made eye contact with him again, and he pulled out of you, staggering to his feet. He shoved his cock into his boxers and started to dress again. 
Jay opened your door, but before he did he cast one last lingering look at you as you laid on your bed. You looked a sight:forehead shining with sweat, two bright, stinging hickeys on your neck, and a pool of piss, cum, and blood oozing from your pussy onto your bed. Hurriedly, as if someone had ordered him to do so, Jay pulled out his wallet and tossed a flurry of bills on your nightstand. “Get something to eat,” he muttered before leaving, slamming your door.
Your fingers crawled down your stomach and dipped your fingers into your vaginal entrance, mimicking the stretch that Jay had given you.
As you rested there, staring at the ceiling, you decided to determine what had happened. The simple answer was that you had been raped. Could you enjoy rape? You didn’t feel like a victim. You didn’t feel like something horrible had happened to you. If you were being honest, this had been the most interesting thing that had occurred in your life. No one had ever felt so strongly about you in any capacity, and it thrilled you. Jay’s hatred invigorated you, made you feel warm.
It filled you.
You plunged your fingers into your vacant pussy and allowed yourself to moan. 
-
You woke up with a heavy body and a foggy mind. For some reason, you thought that you had woken up at Yeonjun’s party, surrounded by a pile of bodies. Instead, you woke up alone, wearing a clean nightgown. A nightgown? Hadn’t you been covered in bodily fluids last night, dressed in an outfit that Isa had picked for you? And your sheets, they were pristine. You smoothed them down as if trying to find remnants of the night before. Had you made all of that up? And if so, from where? It all sounded unreal. Riding a golf cart in the middle of a storm, partying with the Karma Club, and losing your virginity to Jay…
That’s right. You weren’t a virgin anymore. Your first kiss, your first fuck, they were both Jay’s. You glanced at your nightstand, and you the smattering of bills laying on top of your book. You picked one of the bills up, a one hundred dollar bill. You didn’t even think most stores accepted one hundred dollar bills these days. Christ. 
The next thing to do was to check your phone. A dismal sight greeted you: the time was 4:52, you had nine missed calls and 32 messages to parse through. First, the missed calls. Five from Isa, two from Jake, and one from an unknown phone number. You called that one first, and it picked up on the third ring. 
“You’re alive,” Riki said through the phone. “Jesus. Everyone thought you died.”
“Why?”
“What do you mean, why? You’ve been asleep for over 12 hours,” he said. “Your room door was locked. Isa’s been driving herself crazy, and Jay isn’t helping- oh, yeah, Jay is back.” 
Yeah, no shit. “That’s crazy.”
“It is crazy. Been a stupid ass night. Jay won’t tell us where he went. And Jake’s been tweaking since the party.”
“Jake?”
Riki heaved a sigh. “Yup. He’s been pacing around and he has the temper of a chihuahua right now. He’s in Won’s room right now losing his shit. Swear to God, it almost isn’t worth it being KC sometimes.”
“Stressful night,” you commented blithely.
“Isn’t it? I’m on my way to the Stoker caf right now. I’m gonna fuck up a samosa."
“Enjoy it.”
“Oh, I shall.”
You hung up on Riki and groaned. With a degree of annoyance, you flicked through your texts. 
The ones from Isa were about what you had expected. Concerned “where are you” messages that made up the bulk of the 32 texts. Clearly, she got antsy when she was on molly. It was nice to have someone care, though. You didn’t text her back yet, lest she try to come see you. If you saw anyone right now, you thought that you’d explode. 
The texts you were truly apprehensive about opening were the ones from an unknown number. The message started with “hey, it’s jake”, which boded poorly. You steeled yourself and clicked on the text. 
hey, it’s jake. wanted to let you know that i had a lot of fun partying with you last night :) we gotta get you to the club sometime soon. you me isa and riki so isa won’t be third-wheeling
i hope i didn’t make things weird last night. i didn’t mean to rush you or anything.  i tend to think with my heart first instead of my brain, which makes me do stupid shit
not that kissing you was stupid
it was actually really nice
but i know that there’s been this longstanding situation between you and jay, and you probably don’t have the best opinion of us. i can’t blame you for that. and i know i probably haven’t done a very good job of expressing it, but i’m starting to have genuine feelings for you. been that way for a while, but it’s only now that i’ve gotten the chance to show it
so i got carried away
maybe it’s too soon idk but there’s something about you that’s different. i wanna get closer to you, and even if you don’t wanna pursue anything, i’d like to remain your friend
Hastily, you texted him: Let’s talk in person, later.
Not five minutes had passed before Jake texted you: sure, whenever you want. are you okay?
You: Yeah, you?
Jake: been better. did you just get up?
You: Yeah.
Jake: you sleep like a rock
You: It’s been a long night.
You surveyed the damage Jay had done to you in your full-length mirror. Two red hickeys staining your neck, fingerprint-shaped bruises on your stomach, a bruise on your hips, and scars like crescent moons littering your arm near your elbow from his nails digging into you. You found it pretty. 
Shrugging your nightgown on, you glanced at the money that was still on the nightstand. You hadn’t actually eaten anything since you had snacked with Isa. When you left your room, a hoodie covering your nightgown, you checked to see if the Fawcett restaurant was open. It was, but to your dismay Isa was sitting with a group of her friends. She looked exhausted. You remembered that you hadn’t spoken to her or responded to her texts, and you just couldn’t bear to face her right now.
You took the back exit out of the Fawcett building. Hazily, you remembered that Riki had talked about getting a samosa. You called him, and he picked up, making loud chewing noises. 
“Hey.”
“I’m coming to get a samosa. Is the coast clear?”
“Do you mean, is Jay in the cafeteria?”
“...Yeah.”
“Nah.”
“On my way.”
You hung up the phone and, for the first time, walked towards the Stoker dorms. To get there, you had to pass the library, and you made a note to get on the roof and smoke there. It had been nearly a week since the last time you had been able to puff away on a cigarette while you brooded. 
Upon entering, its opulence in comparison to the more modest dormitories was apparent. Why did a college dorm need marble tiles, a chandelier in the dining hall, and a plus red carpet lining the hallway? Unlike the other dorms, which were two story buildings, Stoker had three stories. This was despite being the dorm with the least amount of residents. The foyer faced a staircase that split into two, ultimately leading to the same area. To your right were the glass doors that led to the restaurant. 
As you walked towards the dining area, you looked for Riki. He should have been easy to find, considering his uncommon hairstyle and large stature, but you didn’t see him. 
The dining area was, thankfully, fairly sparse. You shuffled towards the short line for their restaurant, which was a sleek, modern eatery that sold a wide variety of dishes. As you scoured the menu, you heard thudding footsteps behind you. You didn’t bother turning around. 
“Riki tricked me,” you muttered, fingering the bills you had shoved into your hoodie’s pocket. 
“It’s what he’s best at,” Jay said, his breath tickling your neck. “Getting something to eat?”
You would have thought that such close proximity to him would have made you anxious. Instead, smelling his cologne brought a sense of familiarity. Jay teased you, you were the victim. The nature of the universe. “Yeah.”
“With my money?”
“Yeah.”
Jay chuckled. “Well, look at this. I fucked you, you’re using my money…it’s like you’re my girlfriend.”
You turned to look at Jay. He retained his cocksure attitude, but something was different about him. “Don’t you already have a girlfriend?”
He frowned, crossing his arms. “Who?”
Was he an amnesiac? “Isa.”
“Isa?” he asked incredulously. 
“Yeah?”
“Isa,” Jay repeated with a scoff. “No. No, I’m not dating Isa.”
“Tell her that,” you replied.
“I should. Bitch stole my Jane’s Addiction t-shirt,” he muttered. 
“So take it back.” One of the people working beyond the counter politely told you to order, so you turned around and ordered a vegetable samosa, just like Riki. 
“I’ll have what she’s having,” Jay said, flashing his card and tapping it onto the reader.
Things were too amicable. You looked at the card reader, then at Jay, who was grinning at you wickedly. “What, no one’s ever bought you food before?”
“No.”
“Jesus fuck, you really are pathetic,” Jay said, his grin faltering. You walked over to the waiting area, next to the straws and condiments, and Jay followed you over. For a while, you fiddled with a packet of ketchup while Jay stood by, hands in his pockets. You had a million questions you wanted to ask him, but none of them felt suitable for a spot like this, out in the open. 
“Did you tell Riki?” you asked finally.
“Tell him what?” You stared at him pointedly. “What, that we fucked? No. Haven’t told anyone. Wasn’t planning on it.”
“Not even Isa?”
Jay sighed, resting his head on the wall. “No, I’m not going to tell Isa.”
You nodded, feeling a sudden chill. In hindsight, you should have worn a jacket, but you weren’t thinking straight at all. 
“You cold?”
“A little,” you said.
“It’s November, you should have worn a jacket,” Jay said, shaking his head. “Pathetic and dumb…”
When your samosas were ready, Jay got them from the counter. He handed yours to you without a word, so you accepted it quietly. You walked over to an empty table. Like everything else in Stoker, it was needlessly ostentatious. White tablecloths for a college dorm cafeteria? 
Jay sat next to you without prompting. You didn’t know why he was acting so chummy, but you decided to take advantage of it. You decided to ask him one more question. 
“Why’d you do it?” you asked quietly.
Jay waited until he had finished his bite of food before speaking. “Jesus, you’re talkative today,” he grumbled. “I almost miss when you were mute.” 
You sat there and ate your samosa, flicking the crumbs off of the tablecloth. 
“Because I wanted to,” Jay said. He opened his mouth to continue speaking, but a shadow hovered over both of you. When you turned to look at the source of the obstruction, you saw Jake, dressed in his Sad U sweatshirt. His hair was messy, as usual, and he looked exhausted. You chewed your samosa and stared at him.
“Hey,” Jake said, mustering a small smile. “Riki said you were over here.”
Of course he did. “Yeah, Fawcett’s caf is closed,” you said. 
Jake nodded, his hair bouncing. “Wanted to what, Jay?”
Jay looked at Jake inquisitively. “What?”
“You said ‘because you wanted to’,” Jake said, and he began pressing his knuckles against the table. “Wanted to what?”
“Oh, that,” Jay said jovially. “I was talking about last night. I fucked her until she bled and she liked it. Didn’t you, sweetie?”
“Shut the fuck up,” Jake said; his knuckles turned white and his voice was low.
“She was so wet,” Jay continued, putting his samosa on a paper towel. “And she purred like a kitten. The only problem was that she was tight as a bitch. I couldn’t even get my dick out of her.”
Jake slammed his hand on the table. “Fucking stop!”
Jay turned to you, his voice becoming polite. “See, Jakey here is having flashbacks. He hasn’t gotten laid in a long time. The last time he fucked a girl, was, well…”
Jay’s head snapped back as Jake landed a punch squarely on his cheek. You caught the smile burgeoning on Jay’s face before he stood up.
“Look at Jakey, trying to be a real man in front of a girl,” Jay said, dodging Jake’s wild punches. “You weren’t so brave last year.” 
Jake lunged for Jay’s throat and they tumbled to the ground. This was fun and all, but you didn’t really sign up for this. “Jake, stop,” you said, mainly because you felt like you had to.
“He’s always saying vile shit about you,” Jake said, holding Jay’s arms above his head. “This isn’t the first time he’s said gross, fucked up shit like that.”
Jay kneed Jake in the ribs with a gleeful smile, causing Jake to momentarily let go of Jay’s hands. The thought of getting in there and trying to pry them apart seemed funny, but it also repulsed you greatly. You got to your feet, took your samosa, and walked away from the dining hall. Whatever history Jay and Jake had, it went beyond you. You felt like you were a pawn in someone else’s game. 
When you got to the doors of the dining hall, Riki was posed in front of them, recording the fight with his phone. He smiled at you, shut his phone off, and pocketed it. “Pretty cool, right?”
“You tricked me,” you said, pointing at him with your samosa. 
Riki took a bite out of your meal. “I told you,” he said through a garbled mouthful, “I love starting shit.”
You couldn’t deny that he was an honest liar. You tucked yourself into a corner and watched Jay and Jak attempt to maul each other. 
You ate your samosa while Riki spoke. “You didn’t try to break up the fight?”
“Why bother?”
Riki craned his head towards your pastry again, so you held it up to him. “They say that indifference is the greatest form of contempt.”
“Thanks for the life lesson, Girl Meets World,” you deadpanned.
He snorted and wiped crumbs from his mouth. “I think I’m starting to understand why Jay is so obsessed with you.”
“Yeah? Why?”
Riki looked down at you and gave you an odd, almost solemn smile. “I think you’re the only person who cares less about life than him.”
You needed a smoke. Badly. Ideally, you’d like to be put into a 3-day medically induced coma, but a smoke would suffice for now. 
Unfortunately, life wouldn’t award you that kindness. As you sat in your room, debating on just opening the window and having a sneaky cigarette inside, you heard a knock on the door. A groan slipped from your lips before you opened it.
There stood a battered Jake. Split lip, one puffy, red cheek, and an eye that was swelling. “Jay looks worse,” Jake said with a small laugh. You knew that wasn’t true. “Can I come in?”
You nodded and gestured for him to sit down. He sat on the edge of the bed, resting his hands on his jeans as he gathered his thoughts. You locked the door and sat next to him. 
“I wanted to apologize,” Jake said, licking the fresh wound on his lip. “I acted…I wasn’t acting like myself. I was just so angry that he said those things about you, and it just…”
“It’s fine,” you said, looking down at your hands. 
“Thanks,” he said, sounding relieved. Then he frowned again as he glanced around your room. “Listen, uh…you heard Giselle talk about the Mina thing, right?”
“Yeah,” you said carefully. “I don’t know what it is, though.” 
“Wow. Riki kept his mouth shut for once? Impressive. Well…I figure, if we’re going to be friends, I should be honest with you. This is gonna be kind of heavy, so you know, we can save this for another time, or something…”
“I’ll be fine,” you said. “Go ahead.”
Jake cleared his throat and stared at the ceiling. “Well, last year I had a thing with this girl, Mina. She was…she was really shy. Cute. Artsy. She sort of reminds me of you, in some ways, but she wasn’t as mature as you are. Mina was kind of flighty, you know? She always did whatever she wanted.
“We had the same philosophy class, which is how we met. We sat next to each other, and we would talk during class. So we started hooking up, and you could say that we got pretty close. So, earlier this year, in April, I took her to this KC party. Mina wasn’t the biggest party girl, but she liked to take dabs and chill. The others didn’t mind me taking her, so she came with me.” Jake swallowed and glanced at you before returning his attention to the ceiling.
“We had both had a bit too much to drink, so I took her upstairs to my dorm room. And then…I suggested that we fool around a little. And, well, I got a little…I’m pretty rough. It’s not anything bad, it’s just how I like it. She liked it too. It was one of the reasons why we got along so well back then. So I was rough that night, but she liked it. She was definitely acting like she liked it. I don’t know what happened. The morning after, she was freaking out. She was pointing at all the bruises and calling me…she said that I…” Jake rubbed his chin harshly. “It was all bullshit. I don’t know why she didn’t just break up with me instead of trying to ruin my life like that. She spread that shit over the school, she tried…she tried to sue me. All because I wanted to have fun with my girlfriend.”
You waited for him to mention the suicide attempt, but he never did. Instead, Jake let the silence linger, and it was suffocating. 
“Thank you for telling me,” you said, and to drive your point home, you gently touched his arm. Jake looked down at your hand and smiled. 
“I thought you should know,” he said softly. “I wanted you to know.” Jake leaned back on his hands and sighed. “Feels so great to get that off my chest.”
You nodded, rubbing his arm gently, mentally reviewing all of the information you knew. 
“You know what I love about you?” Jake said. “You’re such a good listener. I feel like I can talk to you about anything.”
“I’m glad,” you said.
“Hey.” Jake grasped the hand on his arm and squeezed it tightly. “I meant it, you know. I do like you, but I’m willing to wait, or even just be your friend. It’s all up to you.”
Jesus. How did regular people deal with this? You looked at your conjoined hands as you tried to come up with something to say. “I’ve never even had a friend,” you said slowly, “so this will take a while.”
“I’ll wait,” Jake said earnestly, his eyes glittering. 
“I’ll need those free smoothies first.”
He laughed. “Yeah, of course. Of course, I’ll hook you up. Let’s head to Stopkewich on Monday, yeah? After the library?”
“Sounds like a plan.”
Jake reluctantly let go of your hand and stood up. “I’m gonna go to the health clinic,” he said, jerking his thumb at his eye. “Can’t have this ruining the masterpiece.”
“Be careful,” you said, walking him the short distance to the door. 
“Will do,” Jake said with a wide grin. “See you, Wednesday.” 
As soon as he left, you pulled out your phone and texted Riki.
You: I need Jay’s number.
Riki: why lol
You: It’ll be interesting. I might plant more seeds of strife between your two friends.
Riki: be careful w that
Riki: there’s a delicate balance to shit-stirring
Riki: u can’t do too much of KC will be ruined 
Riki: *or
Riki: like u can’t tell jay some shit that’ll make him hate jake 
Riki: they should hate each other but ntm yk?
You: You’re full of sage advice.
Riki: ikr 
Riki gave you Jay’s number, and you texted him: We need to talk.
Fifteen minutes later, he responded.
Jay: ask nicely.
You didn’t know why you bothered.
You: Never mind. 
Jay: you need to learn how to swallow your pride sometime, you know that?
Jay: thought you would have gotten humbled last night.
You: It wasn’t nearly that transformative an experience.
Jay: god, you’re a cunt. 
Jay: i hope you aren’t getting clingy on me 
Jay: hate it when girls do that
You: You don’t have to talk to me again after this.
Jay: now you’re being dramatic 
Jay: where did you want to meet? your room again? 
You: Rooftop of the library at 11.
Jay: you text like a hitman
Jay: see you then
You were on the rooftop at 10:50, finally enjoying your cigarette. You breathed in the smoke, enjoying the subtle burn, and sighed. The rooftop was damp, so you bunched your coat under your butt and sat on it. The air was chilly, but you didn’t mind. You were focused on getting answers.
Shortly after you had finished your first cigarette, Jay sat down next to you, under the awning of the rooftop. It was hard to see his face in the darkness, the only light source being the full, luminous moon. Judging from the little you could see, you could tell that Jay had gotten the upper hand in the fight. “I didn’t know you smoked,” Jay said. 
You stubbed your cigarette out on the roof and shrugged. 
“I could use a smoke,” Jay said. “What do you smoke?”
You pulled another cigarette out of the pack and placed it between your lips. “Marlboro Lights.”
“You smoke lights? You’re as pussy as your boyfriend,” he said, holding his hand out. “What are you staring at? Give me one.”
You handed him a cigarette and lit your own. Jay leaned towards you, cigarette hanging from his lips, so you lit his own as well. 
The both of you sat there, taking long, peaceful drags. You closed your eyes as you smoked, relishing in the quiet. Jay’s presence didn’t bother you, either.
“I take it you didn’t bring me here to smoke with you,” he said after a while. 
“No,” you said. “I want to know about Mina.”
Jay coughed before barking out a sarcastic laugh. “Mina?”
“Giselle mentioned her at the party last night,” you said, taking another drag. “Jake got weird when Giselle said her name…”
“Giselle has such a big mouth,” Jay said. “Don’t know why Heeseung keeps her around.” He took another hit from his cigarette and looked out at the skyline. “You wanna know what happened with Mina? I’ll tell you what happened with Mina.
“Jake doesn’t know how to pick a decent girl to fuck, that’s his problem. He’s obsessed with finding some girl with mental problems and rehabilitating her using the healing power of his 2 incher. So if you thought he liked you for your stunning personality, then I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news. He likes you because he thinks you’re weak. Mina was even worse, though. She thought she was special because she liked listening to indie music and smoking weed and having crystals and taking Seroquel. Jake loved that shit, though.
“So we had this party in Sunoo’s room. His room is on the top floor, so everyone kind of just spreads out anyways, out into the halls…you don’t care about any of this. Anyways, it was a small party and Jake brought Mina. They fucked in his room and the next day she was saying that Jake raped her.”
“Did he?”
Jay scoffed. “Who knows? The point is that he freaked out at her. Jakey is really conscious about his image. He likes being ‘the nice one’, so he’s always pretending like he’s not as fucked as the rest of us. So he lost his shit, started spreading rumours, dragging her name through the mud. It was pretty funny, but like I said, she was already fucked in the head. 
“So she called Jake one night, like a month after the party, and she’s hollering, saying all kinds of crazy shit. She said…” Jay took a long drag of his cigarette before stubbing it out. “That she was in the bathroom at her dorm, Fawcett. That she was going to take a shit ton of pills and kill herself and put him in her note, yada yada. I thought it was the usual borderline personality ‘please give me attention’ routine, so I was laughing about it, but Jake was tearing himself up. He was too pussy to go over there, so I had to do it.
“You ever seen someone overdose? Mina’s body was twitching and she was literally foaming at the mouth. I had to make sure that she didn’t knock her head against a sink and crack her skull open. I had to sit there and wait while Jake sat in his room with his thumbs stuck up his ass. She stopped breathing at one point, so I had to give her CPR. After that, she left the school.” 
You looked down at your hands. “What’d she overdose on?” 
Jay stared at you. “What, why does that matter? A girl almost died in front of me. Fuck, I was there when they had to give her naloxone. She probably overdosed on her stupid antipsychotics, who gives a shit?” He sighed and rubbed his eyes. 
“Were you scared?”
“Scared? No, I wasn’t scared. I was just…pissed. Pissed that Jake sent me to clean up after his problem.”
You let out a long trail of smoke, and the two of you fell silent again. The air felt thick now, heavy with tension. 
“You know, I didn’t even like it,” Jay said after a while. 
“Like what?” You stubbed out your own cigarette and pulled another one out of your pack. You didn’t normally smoke this much, but you felt as though you were making up for the nights you had missed. 
“Pass me another cig?” Jay opened your mouth, so you put the cigarette in and lit it for him. “I didn’t like fucking you.” He let out a long trail of smoke and leaned his head against the wall. “Physically, it felt good, but I didn’t get what I wanted from it.”
“What did you want?”
Jay chuckled. “What did I want? What I wanted…I wanted to feel something different, besides the way I feel every single day.”
You blew smoke out of the corner of your mouth. “And how do you feel?”
“Nothing. I don’t feel a damn thing.”
“Maybe,” you began drolly, “you should try having sex with someone you like.”
“Won’t happen,” he said. “I don’t like anyone.”
“So what about Is-,”
Jake groaned and pointed his cigarette at you. “Isa, Isa, Isa. You know what her problem is? She thinks she can change me. I don’t get it. She gets with me, and then she’s like, ‘Jay, hold my hand in public!’ ‘Jay, can you text me good morning?’ ‘Jay, can you take me to Nobu?’ I hate that. All those bullshit romantic gestures. They’re not me, and I don’t know why she thinks I would change for her. I can’t change, and I won’t change for anyone.”
You didn’t speak, so Jay continued talking. “I don’t think people can change, you know. I think whatever you show is who you are. When people ‘change’ because they get a little money, that’s just them expressing what they couldn’t before. It’s not that rich guys are all pedophiles. Every poor family has an uncle that likes touching kids. It’s already in you, and it’s just a matter of whether or not you have the means to express it.”
“I don’t think so,” you said quietly. 
“No? Please, enlighten me with your personal philosophy, Ms. ‘I’ll Let My Boyfriend Get beat Up Cause I’m So Aloof.’”
You sucked in a breath of smoke and blew it out slowly, watching the delicate tendrils evaporate into the night air. “I think if a person no longer believes a fundamental truth, then they change. If a child no longer thinks that they’re safe in their house, then they’ll change their behavior.”
“Yeah,” Jay said, “but they still have the capacity to do so. It’s still in their ability to change.”
“Well, change is a conscious decision. You’re saying that people can’t change, I think they can.”
“Quite an optimistic take from the gloomiest bitch in Sad.”
You shrugged. “I never said people always changed for the better.”
“I guess not.” Jay smoked his cigarette quietly for a minute before saying, “You think your boyfriend changed, or do you think he always had it in him to drive a woman to suicide?”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” you said. 
“Ooh,” Jay said mockingly, “what are you going to do if I call him your boyfriend?”
You held your cigarette up, grinning. “I’ll put this out on you.”
Only the faintest of Jay’s features were visible in the darkness, but you could see his lips contort into a slight smile. “I dare you.” He took his jacket off, tossing it to the side, and rolled up his thin long-sleeve. “Do it.”
“It’s too dark,” you said.
 In response, Jay took your hand and pressed it on a spot near his elbow. “Right here,” he whispered. “Right here.”
When had you ever denied Jay of a request? You took your dying cigarette from your mouth and ground it into his arm. At first, you did it slowly, but as he hissed, you twisted the cigarette in. If you listened closely, you could hear the flesh searing. A quiet moan escaped Jay’s lips, a sound that made you feel a familiar warmth. When the cigarette was all but ash, you flicked the remaining butt away. 
“My turn,” Jay whispered. Cigarette clamped between his lips, he reached out and zipped your jacket all the way down. You pulled it off yourself, placing it near his own. Jay gently pushed you onto the roof, so that you were staring up into the sky. With warm hands, he pulled your sweater up, exposing a strip of your bare, tender skin.  You lifted your head up so you could see his movements. One hand held your stomach, his thumb idly swiping at it. The other hand was lowering the cigarette onto your flesh. 
It stung and burnt. You felt no shame in letting out a yelp of pain, but Jay kept going. Good. You wanted him to burn you completely, to leave a scar. You felt that heat grow within you, spreading from your core to your heart to your neck. Jay dug the cigarette into your skin the same way you had done to him. He tossed the butt aside. Then he licked the wound, his cool tongue acting as a balm against the searing pain. Jay swirled his tongue around the circular scar, and you whimpered. 
“You like that?” Jay whispered, both hands running up and down the side of your body.
You hated to lie. “Yeah.”
“Then get to work.” He sat up, so that he was on his knees. You lifted yourself off of the ground as well. Your lips met his expectant mouth, and he tasted like ashes. Jay’s hands remained on your waist, stroking you lightly. It was the first real kiss you had ever initiated, and you weren’t entirely sure where to put your hands. Jay picked up on your apprehension and guided your hands down to his belt.
It was difficult, getting his belt off in the darkness, but you managed to figure it out. “Touch me,” Jay said. 
“How?” 
“Just…” Jay sighed. He placed one of his hands over yours and showed you how to rub him over his pants. “Like that. You don’t have to touch it directly right now.” With that, he resumed kissing you, leaving you to palm his crotch. It was fascinating, feeling his cock harden under your hand like that. You applied a little more pressure, and Jay groaned into your mouth. “Yeah, like that.”
You felt his fingers dance over your knees, along your thighs, and pause by your panties. “No one’s ever touched you here, right?” he asked, whispering against your ear. “Like this?”
“Just me,” you said quietly. 
“I didn’t think you fucked yourself,” Jay said quietly. “How often?”
“Depends…” As you talked, Jay had started to rub your engorged clit through your underwear. 
“Mm. What do you think about?”
“I don’t know,” you said. Your head felt like it was filled with cotton. 
“Keep rubbing me,” Jay whispered. “Don’t slack off, now. Tell me what you think about when you’re cumming your pretty little head off.”
“I read…erotica,” you admitted quietly.
Jay laughed, but it didn’t sound as cruel as it usually did. “Of course you do. You read those bodice-rippers where the innocent little maiden gets pounded by some asshole while she cries, ‘No, no!’, right?”
You bit your lip, and he stroked your clit faster. “Don’t get shy on me now,” Jay said, “we were really getting somewhere. So you fuck yourself to books like that? Do you imagine yourself as the innocent little maiden, is that it? Hoping someone will just push your legs apart and fuck you? Is that what the prude thinks about?”
You didn’t speak, so Jay removed his fingers. “Tell me,” he muttered. “Tell me and I’ll let you cum. Tell me the truth.”
Rationality had left you long ago. You used to look down upon people who would throw away their lives and relationships for quick pleasure, but now all you wanted was for Jay to drive you to the edge, make you cum. “If you’re really good,” Jay whispered, “I’ll fuck you slow this time. I’ll be real gentle.”
“I do,” you said, wincing at your own weakness. “I do imagine myself as her. I want someone to…”
Jay kissed your lips once, twice, three times. “Say it,” he said, two of his fingers stroking your clit at an excruciatingly close pace. 
“I want someone to fuck me,” you said finally. 
“Of course you do,” Jay said, still teasing you. “You liked it when I fucked you, right? You liked that I took what I wanted from you. Admit it.”
If Jay was right regarding his fatalistic theory about humanity’s inability to change, then you were fucked. You hated to believe that this simpering desperation had been inside of you the entire time. “I liked it,” you said, head bowed.”
Jay removed his fingers again, and you looked at him with wide, confused eyes. “You said you’d let me cum.”
“Yeah,” Jay said, lowering his jeans, “you’re going to cum on my dick, and you’ll like it. You loved it last time.”
You tugged your panties down, wincing at the wet, shlicking noise they made. “Just let me do everything,” he said. His voice was uncharacteristically soft. 
Once more, your back hit the cool cement of the rooftop. Jay pulled your panties off completely, tossed them aside, and parted your legs. “Close your eyes,” he whispered. 
His cock teased your entrance before he plunged himself inside. Jay fucked your pussy shallowly this time, allowing himself to enjoy it. “Fuck, fuck, that’s good.” It was so much better now that you were wet. Instead of a harsh intrusion, it was more like a pleasant, warm fullness. You ached for him to go deeper. 
“More,” you murmured, and you heard Jay laugh. 
“More? You don’t want me to be gentle? You don’t want me to treat you with kid gloves?” Jay pulled his dick out of you completely, and you shook your head. 
“No, no, I want more, I want it…please.”
“Please,” Jay said, like it was the first time he’d ever heard the word. “Please. You’re killing me.” 
Jay slammed his cock inside of you, hitting you at an angle that made you see stars.  He gathered your wrists in one hand and held them above your head; the other hand braced itself beside you. Every thrust made you gasp with pleasure.
“Jake would fucking…kill himself…if he saw this shit,” Jay grunted, rutting his hips against yours. He was rough, just like the first time. He could hardly talk, speaking through gritted teeth. “If he saw his little crush in a fucking, fucking mating press…fuck…” 
Your gasps had turned into moans as he thrusted inside of you. You wished you could cover your mouth, but Jay still had your wrists pressed against the concrete. You bit your lip instead, trembling as you felt Jay tease the hard muscle of your cervix. You had never managed to get a good look at his cock, but you figured it had to be big. From the way he made Isa choke, to the way he was close to bottoming out. 
Jay used his other hand to squeeze your face. “No, you don’t,” he heaved. “You’re gonna moan for me. Moan like…like a whore. Like a good fucking whore.” 
The second you opened your mouth, you let out another desperate cry. “You love this,” Jay said, under your sweater. He groped your tits painfully, squeezing them like they were inanimate objects. “You love being treated like this, don’t you?”
“I do,” you gasped out. “I like it, Jay.”
“You love it.” He let go of your wrists, grabbed your hips, and moved you up and down his cock himself. With your free hands, you braced yourself on the ground. You could barely take it, but you loved the feeling of being pushed to the edge. 
“Close,” you panted out.
“Fuck,” Jay said. “Come with me.”
“Where?”
Jay paused, ever so briefly, before laughing. It was the first time you had ever heard him genuinely laugh; he tossed his head back and let loose as he held your hips. “You goofy bitch,” he said, pulling out of you. “Nearly made me lose my orgasm.” You let out a nervous laugh, unsure of what to do next. 
He sank deeply inside of you again, but he couldn’t stop giggling. “Where,” Jay muttered. You couldn’t bear to have him tease you anymore, so you kissed him. He reciprocated, slipping his tongue into your mouth. Soon, Jay had built up the same speed, and his kisses moved to your neck. 
“Gonna cum,” he warned, “where do you want it?”
“Inside,” you said, reaching down to play with your clit. 
“Right answer,” Jay said. He drove his cock to the hilt, frantically chasing his orgasm. You weren’t far behind, chills dancing all over your body. “Fuck, fuck, yes, fuck, yes, yes, fuck!”
You came mere seconds after he did, your pussy gripping him tightly. Your back arched as you let out a series of moans. They echoed into the night sky; everyone in Stoker could probably hear you.  You shuddered as you felt yourself clench around his girth over and over again. His hot cum painted your walls, and when you opened your eyes you saw Jay jerking himself off inside you, draining his balls. 
Jay rolled away from you, gasping. “Jesus fuck. I haven’t had a nut like that in…months.”
You crawled over to your jacket and collapsed on top of it. Jay joined you soon after, lying down on his own coat. If you spoke, you felt like you would make everything real. You shivered, both from the lingering aftershocks and from the chill outside. You realized that you had spent the last 4 nights running around storms and hurricanes. It was a wonder you hadn’t come down with hypothermia. 
“Cold?” Jay asked. You nodded, and Jay put his arm around you loosely. He rubbed your arm noncommittally before simply resting his hand on your skin.  
You stared at the night sky; Sadame wasn’t in the country, but it was far enough from the major cities that you could see a decent amount of stars. 
“There’s the North Star,” Jay said, pointing. “And that’s the big Dipper.”
You shifted to look at him. “You like stargazing?”
“Used to,” he said, facing you. “When my parents would fight, I would leave the house….head to the park near my house and lie on a hill. I’d lie on the grass there and just stare at the stars for hours.”
“You never got scared?”
“Nah,” Jay said. “They were scarier than whatever was out there.”
“When my parents fought, I would just read books,” you said. “I got good at blocking them out.”
“Hm. Where are your cigs?”
“One second.” You rummaged through your jacket’s pocket and procured your cigarettes and lighter. Jay took a cigarette, put one in his mouth and one in yours. He took your lighter and gestured for you to lean in. Jay lit both of your cigarettes at once and tossed you the lighter. 
Jay took a long drag and blew the smoke into the air. “What kinds of books did you read?”
You didn't have to think. “Mm…I liked fantasy books. Sci-fi. Anything different from reality. I liked Animorphs, too, actually.”
Jay chuckled. “Really? Those books with the covers of the kids turning into antelopes and shit?”
“Yeah,” you said. “They were pretty good. I was so envious of them, especially Rachel. Imagine how cathartic it would be to be able to turn into an elephant and stomp around.”
“Was that a very common power fantasy for you?”
“It was.” You imitated the sound of an elephant, and Jay snorted.
“You’re doing it again,” he said quietly. 
The smile dropped off of your face. “Doing what?”
“Quit playing dumb,” Jay said. As if he had been shocked, Jay rose to his feet and hurriedly put his coat on. You couldn’t help the wave of disappointment that washed over you. So he was going to leave you alone again, even after that.
“It’s cold as hell out here,” he said in an irritated voice. “Put your coat on. Let’s go.”
“Where?”
“My room,” Jay said, jerking his head in the direction of Stoker. “I have a bottle of jack in there, if you aren’t tired.” He held his hand out, waving it impatiently. “Hurry up.”
Tomorrow, you would have to text Isa back. Tomorrow, you’d have to talk to Jake. Maybe you’d see Lily, get a smoothie. You’d go do your homework. 
Tomorrow, you’d have to reconcile with Mina’s story and how that would affect your burgeoning friendship with Jake. You'd have to figure out if Riki could be trusted in any capacity. You’d have to figure out what you were to Jay, and who Jay was to you. If you should be something to each other at all.
For today, you simply took Jay’s hand.
914 notes · View notes
jihyoruri · 7 months
Text
❚ ❚ ❚ ❚ ❚ ❚ ❚ ❚ 𓍢 UNEXPECTED kim minjeong x reader
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↳warnings: yn is a member of ive and is described as a loser a lot (like they keep coming for my girl)
for all the years that minjeong knew her ex girlfriend, she never knew the girl had a sister until after they broke up, which is insane when she thinks about it more and she still hasn’t met the girl till this day.
she remembers it like it was yesterday, on the first of december is when the hit girl group ive debuted, yes a lot of people raved about the two ex iz*one members debuting but what made more rave was the girl that looked almost identical to jimin and it wasn’t an exaggeration they had the same last name and some unreal similarities between the two girls that even had minjeong asking jimin as she seen the new idol but the only thing jimin responded with was a laugh.
it was later revealed that the girl was in fact jimin’s little sister which brought a lot of shock to the world including minjeong and a little bit of betrayal, it was weird that jimin never mentioned her little sister, even when they were dating but she never pushed on it not wanting things to become more awkward than it normally was with them lately.
it’s been almost three years and minjeong has had interactions with almost all of the ive members but she’s never had a single interaction with jimin’s sister who she learned name was yn, well not until today.
all four girls sat around each other in their own worlds with their faces in their phones, there’s comfortable silence in the room that jimin breaks.
“my sister is coming over to pick up something.” the leader says grabbing all of the girls attention, “she’ll probably stay for a couple minutes as well.” she says her eyes still on her phone while the other girls look at her like she told the most shocking news in the world.
“wait, we’re actually going to meet your precious little sister?” aeri asked, this was big news for the other girls, jimin never brought her sister around she never even talked about her, “are you being for real?”
“yeah… she should be here in like a minute.” jimin now looking up from her phone and looking at the rest of girls like they’ve grown two extra heads, “is that a problem?”
“no!” minjeong cuts in, “it’s just you never talk about her, you never even told me about her we were dating.” she says before wincing at her words both aeri and yizhuo cringing as well as awkward silence fills the word at the topic of the girls past relationship.
“well… who cares that’s the past.” jimin says looking off to the side, “just don’t jump on her guys, I know my sister and you guys are really intense sometimes.” she says and rolls her eyes at the offensive looks she gets from her members, “she’s quiet and shy and can be weird sometimes, she’s kind of a loser, like mega loser, so please give her some space when she comes in.”
loser? she doesn’t look like a loser from what ive seen minjeong says to herself, she was kind of nervous when jimin said yn was coming over but if yn really is how jimin is describing, then there’s no need.
the girls nod their heads at the leader and silence takes over the room again but not for long as a knock on the door interrupts the silence.
jimin jumps up from the couch she was on and walks over to the door opening it immediately, minjeong hears a soft voice and jimin’s laugh before the door closes.
jimin walks back to where the girls were sitting but this time with someone behind her, minjeong feels something happen in her stomach when she lays her eyes on the girl, she’s on the taller side and pretty lanky but her arms show a slight tone to them she watched as the girl she pushed up glasses up the bridge of her nose looking down at the ground not making any eye contact with girls.
“this is yn,” jimin says putting her hand on the taller girls shoulder pushing her slightly to showcase her to her members, “my baby sister.” she says teasingly patting yn who still looks at the floor.
“fix you posture and look up,” jimin says to yn who immediately straightens up and looks up at the rest of girl showcasing her heart stopping face, aeri whistles quietly earning a nudge from minjeong who can’t seem to take her eyes off the girls face as well.
“im gonna go find what you want, so just sit with them while you wait,” jimin says before sending the girls a warning look before heading to her room.
yn stands awkwardly, while aeri clears her throat, “you can sit between minjeong and I.” she says pushing minjeong over and patting the spot between them.
yn puts her hands in her jean pockets and slowly walks over to where minjeong and aeri are sitting and sits between them, she talks out her hands from her pants and plays with the rings on her fingers and looks down in her lap and minjeong can’t help but let her eyes travel down to the girls toned hands.
“so…yn.” aeri starts, “this is our first time meeting you isn’t that insane?.” the girl says trying to start a conversation but there wasn’t a single thought in her mind as well, just like minjeong her eyes are fixated on yn’s rings.
yn is silent for a second and minjeong shifted uncomfortably in her seat, feeling a strange mix of curiosity and nervousness as she stole glances at yn. despite jimin's description, there was an undeniable allure to yn's demeanor.
“uh, yeah.” yn responded, now getting bored of her rings, she focuses on a keychain of saturn on her pants playing with it, “jimin never talked about you guys much as well.”
“oh really?”yizhuo cuts in with a offended tone, “I’ll talk to her about that.” she says obviously just wanting to troll the leader she gets up, “you should come too aeri unnie,” she says grabbing the other girls attention that was still on the quiet girl.
“uh, sure…” she says getting up and leaving both yn and minjeong on the couch, “I’ll be back.” she says before walking off with yizhuo.
silence fills the room again and all minjeong can do is look at the girl who’s attention is still in her lap, losers shouldn’t be this attractive is the only thing she can say to herself, she’s happy that yn is so in her own world to not notice her staring.
at least that’s what she thought, minjeong quickly turned her head around when yn looked up and turned her head to make direct eye contact with her, she got that feeling in her stomach again, this is embarrassing.
yn stared at her for a second before turning her gaze back to the front and leaning her head back letting out a sigh, minjeong hears her mumbling to herself about how long jimin takes with things.
she awkwardly cleared her throat, “jimin unnie is always taking long right?” she says to the girl who just nods and brings an arm up to rest of the back of the couch.
“so um,” minjeong starts, “isn’t it weird how I was literally jimin’s girlfriend and still never knew about you.”
yn lifted her head back up and looked at minjeong, “jimin had a girlfriend?” she asks bluntly there’s silence before she quietly laughs at the look on minjeongs and it was the first time the other girl has seen her smile since she came in here, it was cute.
“I’m joking,” yn says now looking to side, her demeanor automatically going back to the way it was before, she scratches the back of her neck and angels it in a way that minjeong can see the tattoo that peaks out, “I knew about you, not much though.” “you like tattoos?” minjeong asks, causing the girl to look at her again, “sorry, I noticed the one on your neck.”
“uh, yeah.” yn responds looking down again, “I have more, I can strip and show you the rest.” she says causing minjeong’s face go red.
“sorry,” she laughs awkwardly, “that was a joke, a horrible joke to say to your sister ex.”
oh yeah, for a second minjeong forgot that yn was jimin’s sister, because of how hypnotized she was by the girl, “no, it was funny.” she says moving closer to yn who immediately noticed and tensed slightly.
minjeong felt more confidence, realizing that she was the one in control in this situation, “from the looks of you, somethings telling me you get a lot of girls and guys ”
“uh,” yn says glancing at minjeong before looking back down, “no, not really.”
now this shocked minjeong, why does nobody want the attractive losers? the quite ones are the best she’s never had one in her lifetime so far, but yn is making hard not to want one.
“so, you’ve never been in a relationship?” minjeong asks.
“nope.”
“unbelievable.” she says leaning closer to yn, who fidgets with anything she can at the girl’s closeness.
“I should give you my number.” the girl states which causes yn to just nod, “if that’s what you want, can I ask why? she responds.
minjeong holds her hand out and yn grabs her phone from her pocket and gave it to the girl who added her contact and gave it back, “making new friends is good, sometimes they can lead to more.”
yn awkwardly laughed at the last part and put her phone back in her pocket.
minjeong opens her mouth to say more but is cut off by the footsteps of her members.
“found it!” jimin says walking into the room and aeri and yizhuo trail behind her, it’s a old dsi animal crossings game. “why did you need this?”
yn gets up immediately and takes the game out of jimin’s hand, “I found my old dsi, and I want to play on it, for when yujin unnie yells at me for having my face in my other games for too long.” minjeong couldn’t help but frown realizing that this means that the girl is leaving now, she waves at yn along with the other girls.
“you’re such a dork,” jimin laughs while yn makes her way to the door, “you’re not gonna say bye to the girls?”
“oh yeah, bye.” she says before immediately leaving.
jimin closes the door and looks at the girls, “well, that’s my sister.”
your awfully attractive sister, minjeong says to herself, of course she would find herself being attracted to her exs sister, this was definitely unexpected.
she knew how messy a situation like this could be, but she couldn’t find it in herself to care.
831 notes · View notes
yerimbrit · 5 months
Text
10 hour flight : p. hanni
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synopsis: you bump into a girl more than once at the airport. you learn that she's on the same flight as you, and to top it off, sits right next to you on the plane.
# pairing ! trainee!hanni pham x art student!reader
# tags ! fem!reader, slowburn...?, strangers to lovers, fluff, hanni's debuting soon, reader did some... insane shit in her past, but tbh she's not all that insane herself i swear, she's just reckless, hanni's afraid of flying, reader is '04, reader is a loser unfortunately
# wordcount ! 16k
# warnings ! lots of mentions of injuries/scars
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today was probably one of the biggest days of your life.
you had just graduated from high school in australia in may about 2 months ago, getting into SNU's college of fine arts. you intended to pursue your passion in painting. ever since you were a baby, you've loved to have a hand in art — always scribbling colorful images on everything you could touch, from big pieces of scrap paper to the walls of the living room.
from a young age, you have won a significant amount of trophies and medals for your paintings entered in art competitions. your parents were highly supportive of your hobby, pouring months worth of paychecks into your art lessons and academy tuition fees.
although you were quite grateful, you thought they could be overbearing sometimes. that's why you chose to attend a school far away; to have a breath of fresh air, away from your overprotective mother and father. you could never relax and let loose like you wanted if they were worrying over every little move you made.
for example, the time your parents had left you alone in the house for the first time because they were going to a friend's wedding. they made an extensive list of things to do and not do, and of course, you used the 'not do' side as a checklist.
in your defense, you hadn't planned to have so many people over, just your friend group. but your friend chaeyoung knew a girl that knew another girl that knew a guy, and suddenly your house was hosting a massive party for the entire student-body. it was an honest mistake on your part, vowing to never host a party like that ever again, and sticking to stunts that you could do yourself for some healthy adrenaline.
obviously your parents weren't pleased when they returned, seeing the aftermath of the events taken place the day prior. you were given a big scolding, but you didn't let that stop you from attempting to wreak havoc the next time they were out.
now, family gatherings weren't your favorite. you couldn't get away with anything so long as someone older was watching you. they thought you were a demon. an artistic prodigy demon. they didn't understand how someone like you could be so good at something that was supposed to be so peaceful. you think you've matured enough though; it's been years since you've actually done something bad.
a few of your relatives stayed in seoul after your parents left for melbourne, including your idiot cousin hyein and her parents. it was decided that you were going to live with them, since you've already stayed there on previous visits.
speaking of hyein, it had been a while since you've seen her, last being christmas, which was a disaster. did you say it's been years since your last incident? well, you lied.
all the adults were out for something that you don't remember anything about, and you, being the troublemaker that you were, had convinced the younger girl to help you hang yourself from the ceiling right above the tree. your reasoning was that you'd "wanted to be the star for the night," and sweet little hyein agreed because why wouldn't she agree to her cool older cousin?
(you don't know where hyein got the harness and rope, or how hyein managed to wrap the rope around the beam on the ceiling that extended past the second floor, but the younger lee's eyes practically sparkled at the thought of accompanying you in one of your schemes, so you decided to ignore it.
hyein buckled the harness, tightening it as you squirmed against the restraints. she flashed a mischievous grin at you.
"ready?"
"i was born ready.")
both of you failed to realize that the rope you were using was extremely frayed at the ends and had definitely gone through years of wear-and-tear. it ended up snapping, and in the process, dropped you onto the christmas tree that had just been decorated that morning.
your relatives came home to you and hyein on the floor, wide-eyed, with wounds littering your face and arms from falling onto the tree.
needless to say, you and your little cousin were never allowed alone without supervision again.
on another note, you finally arrived at the airport!
your dad went around the car to open the trunk and started taking your luggage out. shortly after, you and your mom got out of the car and went to join your dad in getting your things.
"so, SNU huh? you're going too far, kid!" your dad chuckled, extending his hand for a handshake.
you gripped his hand firmly, feeling the roughness of his palm, and moving your hands up and down once.
you grinned. "i'll be back before you know it, dad."
you were about to let go until your dad brought you into a tight hug, leaving a kiss on top of your head.
"i know... it's just, we'll miss our star girl, you know?" he patted your back. "it'll be hard for this old man without his little girl around all the time."
you stared amusedly. "even though i always cause trouble when you're not looking?"
your dad let out a hearty laugh and ruffled your hair, much to your chagrin. you took this moment in, absorbing as much of it as you can so you could remember every detail. there were more wrinkles in his skin, and there were visible bags under his eyes. even though he's aged physically, you could tell in his laugh that he was still the same old dad that you've adored since you were little. (he was always the more spoiling parent between him and your mom.)
he stepped back, allowing your mother to rush in for a passionate embrace. you slowly felt your sweater getting damp as your mom sniffled into your shoulder.
"be sure to call when you land, okay? and eat on the flight, it's a long way there. also, the plane is cold so use that blanket i put in your backpack, and-"
you gave your mom a squeeze and briefly pulled away.
"i got it, mom. you told me all of this last night, remember? i even checked everything you said off before we left this morning so i wouldn't forget, so don't worry about me."
she managed a small smile and brought you back into the hug.
"let us know when you've arrived at hyein and her parent's house. and tell them we said hi and to take care of you."
you gleamed. "of course."
after making sure you had everything you needed, you gestured to your parents for a big group hug.
"i love you guys."
"ditto." your mom slapped your dad's shoulder, and you all laughed.
once you made it to the security checkpoint, you waved your parents one final goodbye, before the start of a long journey ahead.
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"excuse me," you mumbled, narrowly avoiding bumping into others in the bustling crowd of the airport. there was a lot of people going back home after vacation, or going back to school or work after visiting home.
heaving a sigh of relief after making through the crowd, you took a moment to look around the area, a plethora of shops and restaurants standing before you. in doing so, you failed to realize you were still in public with thousands of people walking around you, and bumping shoulders with a girl.
"ah!" "ow!"
you widened your eyes as you turned to look at the person you just walked into, swiftly picking her bag up from the ground and handing it to her.
"oh my god, i'm so sorry. i wasn't paying attention," you said, bowing out of habit. the girl giggled. 'oh my god. she has the cutest laugh ever,' you thought to yourself, before looking up to see her face. 'oh my god. she's the cutest girl i've ever seen.'
"it's okay. at least we didn't fall over, right? are you hurt?"
snapping out of your daze (you were staring, and she definitely noticed, you think), you shook your head.
"no, i- i'm okay. are you?"
"mhm, i'm fine! don't worry about me."
you tried to muster out any words relating to asking the girl out, but when you opened your mouth she was already waving to you and turning around.
you cursed to yourself, frowning. "damn it, y/n. you can do all sorts of stupid stuff but you still can't even talk to a girl?"
for as long as you could remember, you've always been unlucky with the girls you talked to. for example, the girl you met at a music festival, who you went on a few dates with. she stopped talking to you after hearing about all the risky things you've done. or the girl who you were paired up with in your advanced painting class, who you almost dated. she cut things off with you because you were too much of a "genius" in art. you still thought that was an asshole move, because what does that even mean?
shaking your head, you forced yourself to stop thinking about your love life in ruins and instead started strolling around the spacious corridors of the airport. you made a mental note to buy something for hyein upon seeing the variety of gift shops lined up next to each other.
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you sipped on your steaming cup of coffee, mindlessly scrolling on your phone to pass the time. your croissant laid half-eaten on the plate. the chatters of the people around you became white noise as you fell into the cycle of liking a post and scrolling down to the next one. if you zoned out enough, you could make out some of the conversations around you. you sighed.
'i miss mom and dad already...'
a bag being placed on the table interrupted your inner monologue before it could even start. startled, you looked up to see a girl. 'oh, a very pretty girl. wait, isn't this the girl from earlier?' you blink. 'shit! it's the girl from earlier!'
"excuse me, but could i take this seat?" she glanced around, then met your eyes. "there's, well. not exactly anywhere else to sit, ahaha..."
opening and closing your mouth, you wordlessly moved some of your things so she could set her cup down. she smiled at you, eyes crinkling up into slight crescents, and you think you've met the love of your life, judging by the way your heart thudded in your chest after seeing the human embodiment of an angel.
she took a sip of her drink. "thanks."
the atmosphere became suffocatingly awkward, and you nervously tried to redirect your gaze to anything but the pretty girl sitting in front of you. your attempts failed, unfortunately, because apparently trying not to look at someone is a lost cause, and your mind automatically filled with the brief memory of the stranger's laugh, smile, and face. giving up, you let your eyes find their way back to her face, surprised to see that she was already looking at you. you coughed.
"so," you started, "whEre-" 'what the hell. leave it up to me to have a voice crack while starting a conversation.' she giggled, and you bit your lip trying not to scream.
fiddling with the hem of your shirt, you cleared your throat and started again. "ahem. i um, meant to say... where, where are you headed to?"
she hummed, taking another sip of her drink. "korea. i'm... hoping to make music there. where are you going?"
you nodded. "music, huh... that sounds really cool," a look of realization dawned on your face, and your eyes widened. "wait, did you say korea?"
a questioning look appears on the girl's face, and she nodded. "yeah, korea. why?"
"i'm going to korea too! i got accepted to SNU's college of fine arts. i paint and stuff."
her mouth formed an "o" shape and she gave you an impressed look.
"that's impressive! it must've been stressful for you."
you grinned, taking a small bite of your almost-forgotten croissant. "it was. i almost lost hope, refreshing my email page over and over at night," you said, shaking your head. "by the way, what's your name?"
the girl looked startled, clearly not expecting the sudden question. the flash of surprise only lasted briefly, however, and she hastily cleared her throat to reply.
"hanni," she smiles, "hanni pham. what's yours?"
"y/n. lee y/n."
"well, y/n... it was really nice meeting you. maybe i'll see you in korea. you could design one of my album covers, haha."
you gulped, trying to ignore the burning heat rushing to your cheeks at the way your name rolled off her tongue. "oh! yeah. it was great talking with you, hanni. and if we do meet again... i'll do my best with the design."
she took her finished cup of whatever she ordered, and her bag, and waved to you with that angelic smile of hers as she walked away with her suitcase.
"nævis, calling-" as if right on cue, your phone's ringtone went off, the beat drop of aespa's next level playing at an extremely loud and embarrassing volume. you sheepishly mouthed sorry to the people around you, who were staring because of the noise, and picked up the call.
you cleared your throat, lowering your voice. "hello?"
the excited voice of hyein rang out into your ear, "unnie! y/n unnie!"
you winced and moved the phone speaker slightly further away from your ear.
"hi, hyein. what's up?"
you heard some shuffling around, and what seemed to be like your aunt's voice scolding hyein for yelling.
"hello y/n, sorry about hyein, she's really excited to have you here soon."
you subconsciously smiled at the thought of your little cousin counting down the days until your arrival. "don't worry about it, auntie. did you need something?"
there was some whining from hyein in the background, and your aunt sternly called her name, effectively shutting her up. "nothing, nothing. just wanted to check in with you. you're at the airport now, yes?"
you nodded, even though she couldn't see you. "yeah, i am. i got some coffee at a cafe and i'm about to head to the gate. by the way, did you guys want anything for the last time in a while? the chocolates at the gift shops are always good, i know you and uncle like them."
there's a thud, and you blinked at the silence that followed. you waited, checking your phone to see if the call was still connected, and raising an eyebrow when hyein's voice finally crackled out into the microphone.
"haah... haaaah... finally..."
"hyein?"
"i want a kangaroo keychain! the cute plush ones!" you once again pulled the phone speaker away from your ear when she yelled again.
'aren't those really expensive?' you thought, slightly grimacing at the thought of your soon-to-be empty wallet. 'oh well.'
you laughed as you pressed the phone to your ear to speak again. "okay, okay. anything else?"
"get two. i wanna match with you, unnie!" by now your wallet was really crying. 'the things i do for you, hyein.'
"alright... well, i have to get to the gate now. i'll see you later? say bye to auntie for me," you told hyein, finishing your pastry and cleaning up your table before getting up from your seat.
"okay! bye unnie!" and the call dropped. you sighed, shaking your head while smiling, and started making your way towards your gate.
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(you held the small keychains in your hand. they were the size of your palm, and you turned it around to check the price tag.
"holy shit, 15 dollars for this tiny thing?!"
"it's for hyein, she wants to match. it's for hyein, it's for hyein, it's for hyein...")
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"hanni?"
"y/n?"
well, that was sooner than you thought. as soon as you made it to the seating area, you spotted a familiar face: the pretty girl named hanni that you bumped into earlier. before, you couldn't start a conversation with her without stuttering and stammering, but the feeling of your lighter wallet must've left you more easygoing after mourning your diminished funds on the way to the gate. (you were at least glad you could make hyein happy.)
she gestured to the seat next to her, her bag occupying it moments prior. grateful, you thanked her, and moved to sit, setting your suitcase in front of you. just as you started to relax, hanni gently tapped your shoulder, nearly making you jump.
"fancy seeing you here?" she said, her grin accompanied by a lighthearted tone.
you breathed a sigh of relief. her lopsided smile sent waves of comfort through you, allowing you to ease into the moment.
"yeah, what are the chances? we're on the same flight," you remarked, a small grin settling on your face as well—hanni's smile was very contagious when you weren't distracted by her beauty, you noted.
hanni nodded, grin widening. "seems like the universe has its plans. maybe it's fate?" she quipped.
"haha, maybe."
a moment of silence passed, and you both burst into a fit of giggles.
you never believed in fate, despite your friends talking your ear off about it. whenever they asked for your input, you brushed it off as a silly superstition. comes with messing around doing stunts all the time, you supposed. after all, you were unpredictable, and so was the world. the thought of your future being predetermined made you shudder.
wanting to continue the conversation, you racked your brain for anything she told you earlier. what was it she was doing... ah, music!
you cleared your throat, bringing hanni out of a daze. she turned her attention to you, eyebrows raised.
"you're doing music, right?" she nodded, "yeah, i've already signed with a company and all."
"really? which company?"
she hummed thoughtfully, and pursed her lips. "sorry, i'm not allowed to tell."
"ah, that's okay," you said, scratching your neck. "do you play an instrument? or do you sing?"
"i do both, actually!" she said with a smile, her voice warming. "but i'm focusing on singing. what about you? you do art, right?"
you perked up at the mention of art. "yes, i do, i love painting," you said, eyes brightening.
"actually, there was this time where i tried to smash my head through the canvas for a project- hey, don't laugh, let me finish! i tried to make it so that the end product would be my face, with action lines outside the rip marks, but the canvas broke in half, and i ended up with a ton of scratches on my face..."
the two of you continued to chatter away, the conversation flowing effortlessly between you. your surroundings became a blur as you lost yourselves in the moment, unaware of anything happening outside of your bubble of conversation.
you suddenly remembered that you were waiting for a flight, and frowned. "hey, don't you think it's been a while since they've said anything? it's close to boarding ti-"
the calm voice of a flight attendant interrupted your question.
"attention all passengers going from melbourne to incheon: there's been some technical difficulties, and we are disappointed to inform you that your flight will be delayed. departure time will be pushed back by approximately one hour. thank you."
as murmurs spread through the gate and disappointed voices filled the air, you felt a sense of frustration wash over you. fishing your phone out of your pocket, you quickly sent a text to your aunt about the delay, your irritation evident in your furrowed brow.
hanni puffed out her cheeks in frustration. "ugh, unlucky."
you nodded in agreement, a sigh escaping your lips. "yeah, it's frustrating. now we're gonna be there even later in the night," you replied, your gaze shifting from your phone to meet hanni's disappointed eyes.
"i guess there's nothing we can do about it now."
"yeah, i guess so."
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hanni always thought she led an honest life, steering out of trouble and focusing on her passion for music. she made sure to feed the dogs, keep up with her studies, help her mom cook, and get along with her younger sister. she had a lot of friends, and she was in a dance cover group with some of them too. she played the ukulele, guitar, and piano, and she sang as well.
then she auditioned for hybe, and passed. her family was proud of her, and she left to korea for training shortly after. she missed home a lot. like waking up to milly and mia's excited barks for breakfast, or bickering with her sister in the car on the way home from shopping, or having family bonding time during dinner.
love was the last thing on her mind when she started training. sure, she's had some crushes here and there, but she's never pursued any of them. that was all there was to it; just a silly crush. when she became a trainee, any thoughts of crushes in hanni's mind were pushed aside for dancing and singing lessons, as well as korean classes.
but after your fateful encounter (or, well, encounters) at the airport, hanni thought she could forget about coming back to training for at least one day.
from the moment she saw you, hanni pham was dazzled. when you bumped into her, you immediately apologized, and even picked up her bag for her. when you finally looked at her, and she could see your face, hanni almost screamed. you were so, so, beautiful. and she had to make her leave before she actually screamed.
then hanni saw you again at a random airport cafe, and everything clicked. lady luck must've finally looked on her side this time, because there were clearly open tables all around you, but you still let her sit with you. with that, she let the conversation flow between the two of you.
by the end of your second encounter, hanni must've thought her luck ran out by now and left with an open offer, knowing you would never see her again after she left.
and then you finally reunited at the gate. well, if hanni thought her luck ran out at the cafe, then it had definitely run out now. there was absolutely no way she could get any luckier than being on the same flight as you.
was it bad she's started to develop a crush on you?
there was a thump next to her, and hanni felt an added weight fall on her shoulder. she turned to see if you dropped something, but it seemed that your head dropped on her shoulder, having fallen asleep. your head. on her shoulder. you fell asleep on her shoulder.
hanni's face was bright red at the realization. you fell asleep! on her shoulder! her body immediately tensed, instinctively trying to get you off, but gave up after you only shifted closer to her. and well, she didn't want to interrupt your sleep, since you seemed exhausted just moments ago.
she couldn't help but think your sleeping face was beautiful too.
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"attention all passengers going from melbourne to incheon: apologies for the wait. boarding will begin in 15 minutes. thank you."
the announcement jolted you awake, and you sleepily rubbed your eyes and lifted your head from where you were leaning it on, stretching your neck to hear a few satisfying cracks.
"did you sleep well? you just suddenly passed out; i was worried," a soft voice asked.
you tried to blink out more of the sleep out of your eyes and focus on the voice next to you, finally seeing hanni's concerned expression.
clearing your throat, which was hoarse from your nap, you offered her a sheepish smile. "yeah, i slept well. i was so anxious last night that i went to sleep really late, that's probably why. sorry about that."
hanni nodded. "no worries! going away from home is scary, i agree."
you tried to reach for your phone, only to look down and see hanni's jacket draped over you. 'huh?' you thought. 'wait, come to think of it, what was i sleeping on?'
you shot a glance over to hanni, who tilted her head. you squinted your eyes, trying to connect the dots. then, it hit you like a pile of bricks: you fell asleep on hanni's shoulder. your cheeks dusted pink in embarrassment, and you cringed at even the thought of it.
'god, that's embarrassing!' you thought, feeling a sense of mortification burning in your chest. 'she even used her jacket as a blanket for me, and she asked if i was okay when i woke up...'
"oh my god, i'm so sorry!" you blurted out, the words tumbling out of you in a rush. "i really didn't mean to fall asleep on you, i mean i didn't even realize i was falling asleep, but-"
hanni giggled, the pleasant sound resounding through your ears.
"it's okay, y/n. i don't mind."
'ah... it's almost like an angel got sent down from earth.'
despite you intruding on her personal space, hanni was still so kind and considerate to you, even though you only met each other a couple hours ago. a heavy blush overtook your face.
"here's your jacket back, at least," you offered, a mixture of gratitude and embarrassment showing in your tone.
she shook her head, waving her hands. "oh no, you can keep it on. you must be cold in only that sweater."
you opened your mouth to protest, but ended up just smiling.
was it too soon to say you liked her?
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the flight attendant walked up and down the aisle, checking for everyone's seatbelts. you and hanni sat comfortably towards the front of the plane, flashing friendly smiles at each other.
you and hanni sitting next to each other? what? wait, let's rewind. how did you find yourself sitting next to hanni, the girl of your dreams who you were talking to at the gate, and at the cafe, and outside of the security checkpoint?
well, the two of you were in the same boarding group. and taking a look at your tickets, you were actually seated right next to each other.
funny how fate plays out, huh.
it seemed like hanni was thinking the same thing, because she started giggling, nudging your shoulder.
"it's funny how fate plays out, huh?"
"absolutely," you replied with a grin, matching hanni's playful tone. "seems like fate has quite the sense of humor, doesn't it?"
hanni giggled again, her laughter echoing softly in the aisle.
"definitely," she agreed, a hint of amusement sparkling in her eyes. "who knew our paths would cross like this? and especially so many times in a day?"
as the flight attendants made their final rounds, you relaxed in your seat and turned to observe hanni, who was looking out the window. her gaze wandered, from the people on the ground crew to other planes preparing for takeoff. you noticed her shiver, and quickly took her jacket off from your shoulders and draped it over both of your laps.
surprised, she looked over to you with raised eyebrows, then smiling at you, mouthing a 'thanks'. she turned her attention back to the window.
you directed your gaze to your lap, leaning back in your seat. your seatbelt kept you from slouching back. you felt your phone vibrate in your pocket, and you unlocked it to see a text from hyein.
from: mom's favorite child (🐣) UNNIE!!!!!! 😚😚 what do u want for dinner moms asking also did u get the keychains 😈
you laughed to yourself, typing in your response. you purposely waited between each message sent, to tease her; hyein always hated when you did that.
to: mom's favorite child (🐣) hi hyein 🤓 i want kimchi jjigae!! also [attachment: 1 image] yes i did
you almost drooled at the thought of your aunt's kimchi-jjigae. the first time you had it, you were hooked. no matter how many times your mom tried to recreate her sister's cooking, it never hit the same as when you'd stay at hyein's house for the holidays and wake up to the smell of your favorite dish in the morning.
from: mom's favorite child (🐣) got it o7 (replied to [attachment: 1 image]) ↪ AHH THEYRE SO CUTE OMGOMG (replied to "hi hyein 🤓") ↪ who are you calling a nerd.
giggling to yourself, you decided to leave hyein on read, swiping out of her contact after reacting to her text confirming your request with a heart.
the jets of the plane fired up, starting to taxi down the runway, and you pocketed your phone and joined hanni in looking out the window.
"have you flown here before?" she asked, keeping her gaze outside.
you hummed, thinking back to your very eventful past visits to your aunt's place for vacation.
"yeah. i have family here, that's where i'm staying for college." you said. "i've gone over a bunch of times for the holidays."
the girl next to you stayed quiet, still staring outside. the plane started to tilt up, and you could see hanni bite her lip. as the aircraft gained elevation, going higher and higher, her eyes grew shut and her face scrunched up.
then her hand flew to yours, clasping yours with an almost crushing grip, eliciting a slight wince from you.
"hanni...?"
her eyes remained tightly shut as she stuttered out a response. "so-sorry! i'm a bit... afraid. of- of planes."
you felt the plane make a sharp tilt to the right, and the left, and hanni's grip only intensified.
"no matter how many times, i- i fly... it doesn't seem to get any better... i'm sorry," she mumbled. if you weren't craning your head to listen, you wouldn't have caught half of what she was saying, considering she was trying to focus on containing her fear.
her hold on you loosened, almost as if she was ashamed, but you only responded by firmly squeezing her hand back. if she's scared, then you should comfort her, right? it's only the right thing to do.
the action caused her to whip her head towards you, her gaze darting between your hand tightly grasping hers and your face. this went on for a few seconds, your concern for the girl growing as the moment stretched on. you watched her closely, noticing the furrow in her brow and the tension in her soft features.
when she finally stopped at your face, you offered her a comforting smile. she blinked a few times, widening her eyes, and reciprocating the gesture.
the plane started to stabilize in the air, letting hanni's anxiety simmer down while you rubbed soothing circles into her palm. it seemed to help, since her shoulders visibly relaxed as she took deep breaths, flashing a grateful smile to you. despite the plane now flying steadily, you never let go of her hand, continuing to offer a sense of solace in case the girl's anxiety spiked.
after around 10 minutes (you didn't really know, your watch was in your bag and you still hadn't let go of hanni's hand) a flight attendant started making her first round down the aisle for drinks and biscuits. as she reached your row, her cheeks raised up in a cooing smile, her gaze clearly lingering on you and hanni's now-intertwined hands.
"aren't you two just the cutest couple," she remarked, her smile widening.
hanni's cheeks flushed, and she quickly shook her head, stammering, "oh, no, i'm, we're not-"
before she could deny the attendant's assumptions, though, you swiftly interjected, flashing a grateful smile to the attendant. "thank you. we'll have a cup of water," you glanced at hanni, thinking for a moment, "and some hot tea."
the attendant gladly poured your refreshments, sending you a "hwaiting!" gesture before moving on to the next row.
"i'm so sorry," you turned to hanni, releasing her hand. a wave of disappointment hit you at the loss of hanni's warmth. she seemed to share the feeling, although you didn't notice.
"it's fine. it would've been embarrassing for all three of us, anyway."
"yeah..."
the two of you turned away from each other, blushes overtaking your features.
'the thought of dating her doesn't seem so bad.'
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it had been about an hour and a half since takeoff. you texted some of your friends, who checked in on you frequently, asking things like 'are you dead' or 'did the plane crash yet', to which you replied 'not yet sadly' or something similar. you were doodling random cats in your notes app in between texts.
to your left, hanni had pulled out a book, seeming invested in the pages filled with words of plot. she was almost at the end, you noticed—there were only a few pages left.
a few more minutes passed, and the girl closed the book with a content sigh. after tucking the book safely into her carry-on bag, she peeked around her, her eyes landing on you, scanning your features.
"hey, how'd you get this scar on your cheek?"
you felt a poke on your upper cheekbone, hanni's finger pressing lightly on the tender patch of skin. you brought your hand up to your face to touch the already fading scar, and tried to remember which incident it was from.
"i think it's from when i jumped out one of the school windows," you answered, turning to look at hanni.
"oh," she replied, then raised her eyebrow. "wait, what? you jumped out the window?"
you scratched your neck, feeling embarrassed. 'she's definitely gonna be scared away after i tell her,' you thought ruefully. glancing over to hanni, you quickly realized you weren't going to get away with not telling her the backstory of the scar.
you sighed. "it's not that interesting, i mean..."
the girl beside you watched with expectant eyes, eagerly awaiting your next words. you pondered, wondering if you should really tell her.
"i set off some firecrackers on the school roof, and they found out it was me not even five minutes later," you explained, "i sped down the stairs and hid in some cleaning closet. but they somehow knew i was in there, so i had to jump out the window and run home before they caught me."
a few beats of silence followed, your self consciousness catching up to you as the tip of your ears flushed bright red. when you sneaked a glance to your left, you saw hanni's mouth agape.
"wow," she blinked. "that's insane."
"i know."
you rubbed your elbow, fidgeting with the fabric of your sleeve. 'she's definitely weirded out. see, y/n, this is why girls never-'
"but you're okay, right?"
'huh?' you thought to yourself, then facing hanni. she had a worried smile on her face, head tilted to the side. your cheeks burned. you couldn't win against pretty girls.
"oh. yeah, i am. i just landed in a bush, and a branch scratched me."
she nodded, scanning your features. aside from the one on your cheek, there were a few other minor scars on your face, from similar events, although those were more hidden. there were a lot of them around your body too, from burn marks to scratches and cuts.
"what's this one from, then?" she pointed under your ear, where a small scar from a healed cut laid.
"this one? it's kind of recent. i was trying to make an outline of myself with throwing darts, but my friend had terrible aim. it grazed my neck."
hanni winced, cringing as she imagined how that felt for you. "yikes."
she thought for a moment, a memory resurfacing at the mention of darts.
"that reminds me, there was a time me and my friends were playing darts, but we all kept missing the board," she smiled, reminiscing on the past moment. "we hit everything in the house but the dartboard."
you smiled as well, finding humor in the similarities between you and hanni's experiences. well, except for the fact that your friend was supposed to miss you, the target.
"what did your parents say?" you asked, genuinely curious. your parents usually restricted your actions, like not letting you go out after school or supervising your purchases, but ultimately let you off the hook in the end. you thanked them for that mentally, albeit feeling a tad guilty for being spoiled.
she tapped her chin. "they just scolded us and told us not to do it again. and we had to clean up our mess—there were a bunch of darts on the ground, and things that fell because of the darts."
you laughed, finding her memory relatable. there were countless times you were made to clean up your messes, although you didn't exactly learn from your "mistakes." (you considered them "happy accidents," as bob ross said. alas, your peers, relatives, and teachers alike, disagreed.)
"how did your parents react to your injuries?" hanni questioned, her expression softening.
"well..."
you and hanni started getting to know each other better, warm and lively conversation filling the air. you learned that she was raised in melbourne, and that both of her parents were vietnamese. she had two dogs and a younger sister, and she played a variety of instruments.
you told her about some other incidents, to which she was amused by, and touched lightly on the awards you've received for your paintings.
topics shifted constantly, the two of you seeming not to run out of things to talk about. with debates on something as trivial as which juice flavor was better, more memories from your childhood came flooding back, the two of you sharing your experiences and bonding over them.
'this is nice,' you thought, a glimmer of hope rising. 'maybe, things will go well this time.'
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from: 🆕👖 (soon) meanjee 🐻 hanni are you on the plane? kitty kang 😾 did you bring the tim tams dani ☀ omg did you get tim tams for us 🥺🥺 you yes dw i also made a friend meanjee 🐻 who dont lie 🤣😂 you excuse me her names y/n shes an artist guys shes so cute 😭 we kept bumping into each other and guess what kitty kang 😾 you tripped over yourself? dani ☀ you asked her out!? you (replied to kitty kang 😾: you tripped...) ↪ do you want the tim tams or not kitty kang. (replied to dani ☀: you asked her...) ↪ NO we just met but i was TRYING to say that we bumped into each other accidentally like 3 times and we're on the same flight and sit next to each other dani ☀ it's destiny!! meanjee 🐻 i never thought i'd see the day hanni having luck in girls 💀 you WOW im js gna ignore that. remember my fear of flying? she held my hand the whole time bc she saw i was scared :(( shes js so AUGH :] i think she likes me too kitty kang 😾 she has more game than you im glad she could comfort you though dani ☀ AWW that's so cute you two are so cute i wanna meet her! you maybe if things go well with her hyeinie THE BEST MAKN😎E hiii whats going on (replied to you: excuse me her names...) ↪ wait did u say y/n?? you yeah why? hyeinie THE BEST MAKN😎E um actually its nothing i have to help mom with cooking bye unnies!! you ???
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hanni stared at your hand, which was holding out an earbud, in confusion. she tilted her head.
"ah, sorry. do you want to listen to something with me? you can choose the song," you smiled, showing your phone screen which displayed the spotify search menu. (you made sure that it stayed on the search bar and not showing one of your many embarrassing playlist names.)
her eyebrows raised, a flicker of curiosity in her eyes as she processed your words. you swallowed nervously, about to retract your hand until she took the earbud from your hold, her hands brushing against yours briefly.
"sure," she agreed, then reaching for the device from your other, outstretched palm. "do you like daniel caesar?"
your bangs fell over your face as you nodded eagerly, blocking your vision. you moved to tuck your hair behind your ear, though hanni beat you to it, her cold hands contrasting with your now-burning-red ears.
hanni cleared her throat with a quiet cough, breaking into a smile shortly after. the two of you listened to the melody of the song that was being played into your shared earbuds, hanni occasionally humming along.
"and i'd love to make you mine," she softly sang, her gentle voice filling your ears. she sounded like cotton candy, so sweet, like honey drizzled over warm toast on a sunny afternoon. each word that she sang sent you into bliss, arrows of cupid piercing your heart. 'maybe,' you thought, 'just maybe. i'll ask her out on a date by the end of this flight.'
the last few seconds of the song faded out and started playing whatever was recommended by your spotify (which was a wave to earth song) but you couldn't pay attention as you found yourself replaying hanni's singing in your head.
noticing your furrowed eyebrows and your dazed look, hanni nudged your shoulder. "sorry, was i too loud? i tend to sing along sometimes; it's always been a habit of mine."
you widened your eyes, shaking your head no. "no, you're fine! i think your singing is quite nice, actually. you have," you blushed, "a very pretty voice."
her cheeks lifted into a closed smile, sending a flutter through your chest. you took a few deep breaths, trying to calm your thumping heart. at least you didn't panic at everything she did, unlike the past 10? 20? times she did so much as smile.
"thank you," she giggled, leaning her head on yours. deep breaths were not going to help in your situation, since it seemed to get even worse for your heart every time. instead, you focused on the song playing in your ear, and the rise and fall of hanni's chest. it wasn't too long after the next song started when you started hearing small snores next to you.
'ah,' you thought. 'she must've been tired.'
moving her head to sit more comfortably on your shoulder, you brushed her bangs out of her face, unconsciously smiling at how peaceful she looked asleep. you adjusted the jacket that was laid over both of your laps to cover more of her legs instead of yours, slightly shivering as you instantly felt the cold from the cabin aircon replacing the warmth from hanni’s fleece jacket.
‘oh, well.’
you rested your head on top of hers, sarah kang’s once in a moon quietly playing into your shared earbuds, and you let yourself slowly drift off to join hanni in dreamland.
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"mmph..."
you groaned as you rubbed your eyes sleepily. your neck was stiff, your shoulder was sore, and you had 12 different cramps in your legs from your uncomfortable position in the airplane seat.
hanni shifted on your shoulder, and you panicked, thinking you might've woken her up from your stretching. thankfully, her soft snores continued after a few moments.
you sighed in relief. you would've felt insanely guilty if you ended up waking her.
stretching your shoulders back, (though still careful not to wake the sleeping girl leaning on you) you reached into your backpack under the seat in front of you, and pulled out your sketchbook.
the thing itself was around a year old. over that year, you'd nearly filled it to the brim with dozens of drawings, including ones you drew on buses, trains, at parks, in history class, on your bed, everywhere. similarly, you kept a sketchbook for each year prior to the one currently in your hand. it was almost time to retire this one; you only had about 3 pages left.
taking a small pen out from your wallet, you pressed the fine tip to the smooth beige paper, soon letting your arm move freely across the page, sketching things you could see around you—the overhead aircon, someone's paper cup of water from the recent beverage round sitting on their tray table, and...
you looked to hanni, then back to your sketchbook. you'd subconsciously started drawing hanni while looking around your surroundings (or, lack thereof). although it was quite difficult to get a decent look of her features as a whole, you managed to sketch out the way her bangs framed her face, the curve of her eyelashes, and her mouth slightly ajar.
the people around you must've thought you were crazy watching you try to lean forward to look at hanni, while also trying to keep your movements minimal as to not wake her. but that was okay. people back home already saw you as crazy when you did anything, especially after the wheelie incident, which you didn't want to think about.
after finishing the initial sketch, your hand appeared to have a mind of its own, because it moved to the next page over and started doodling more of hanni. you squinted your eyes, trying to remember what she looked like when she bumped into you, when she sat across from you at the cafe, and when she was sipping from the cup of tea you called for her a few hours ago.
the page was filled with hanni's face in the blink of an eye. you didn't know how it happened, but it would be really embarrassing if said girl woke up and saw this right now.
"mmm..."
...why didn't anything go your way?
you flipped back to the page full of doodles of the cabin before she could see anything, covering the page with your sleeve. you tensed your shoulders in nervousness, quietly clearing your throat.
"sleep well, hanni?"
hanni's lips upturned into a sleepy smile (you screamed a little mentally at her cuteness) and she nodded, giving you a thumbs up.
"thanks for letting me use you as a pillow," she said, rubbing your numb shoulder.
you laughed to yourself, mostly because you couldn't feel your shoulder as hanni touched it. "it's no problem. i wasn't going to let you have neck cramps from leaning on the wall."
she nodded again, stretching out her muscles and letting out a big yawn. her eyes shifted back towards you and down at your lap, where you placed your sketchbook.
"what's that?"
a bead of cold sweat rolled down your forehead, and you gulped. what if she was creeped out at your drawings of her? then, your mind wandered to the moments you shared just earlier, and you thought, 'there's no way hanni would act like that.'
you shyly uncovered the page, passing the book to the girl, watching intently as she pored over the details that you'd meticulously drawn. her mouth gaped in astonishment, in awe of your ability to capture the scene around you.
she turned her head towards you, eyes sparkling. "this is amazing, y/n!"
you bashfully scratched your neck, giving her a sheepish smile.
"it's nothing, really," you tried to say, but her attention was already on the next page.
"this is... me?"
crap.
"um, yeah. it is. there's not much to see from our seats, so i ended up drawing mostly you," you tried to defend, hoping she wouldn't take your actions badly. "you're also, very," you cleared your throat, blushing, "pretty. very... pretty, yeah."
she grinned, cheeks dusted pink, and trailed her hand down the page, tracing over the soft features—her features—that you'd effortlessly drawn as she slept.
"can i keep it?" she asked, looking into your eyes for approval.
shrinking back from the unexpected eye contact, you gulped and nodded. you were thinking about giving it to her anyway.
"yes. i'd love to give it to you, as something to remember me by, haha."
after you finished your sentence, you gently grabbed the sketchbook from hanni's already offering hands, and left your signature on it. the ripping sound of the book hummed as you removed the page from the confines of the spiral spine, handing it to your seatmate.
her grin grew wider as she accepted the paper. "thank you so much, seriously. this is so cool!"
"it's no problem," you laughed, tipping your invisible hat to her.
the flight intercom beeped.
"hello, this is your pilot speaking. we have arrived in incheon, local time is 10:42 pm. please make sure your seatbelt is secured and your seat trays and window blinds are up, and also unplug any devices you may have. enjoy your stay in korea and have a good night."
hanni, who just tucked your drawing into her bag, looked over to you with surprised eyes. "it's the end already? i swear we've just been here for like, 3 hours."
you were shocked too, your eyebrows raised. "i know, right? but i guess we did spend a lot of it sleeping."
"yeah, you're right," she giggled.
you took a deep breath, not knowing what to say. "it was, um... really nice getting to know you. i know it was weird seeing each other so much in a day by chance," you said, "and uh, if you'd like, we could, um, go out on a date sometime?"
a scarlet blush overtook your face, and you think the people behind and in front of you must've heard you say that because you heard a gasp or two from your surroundings.
hanni's face was terribly red as well, and it made you feel a little better knowing you weren't having one-sided feelings.
"o-okay. deal."
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the rest of the time spent after that was a blur to you, and it took you until you sat down on hyein's living room couch that you forgot to give hanni your number.
holy shit, y/n. you asked a girl out on a date. and after spending basically the whole day together, you forgot to exchange contact info with her? this was on a whole new level of sick and twisted, even for you.
"we're home!" a gruff voice called, followed by the sound of the heavy door closing, and the sound of excited footsteps followed, rushing in your direction.
a minute later, you got tackled by a very hyper hyein.
"unnie! unnie, you're here!"
her hold on you was incredibly tight. you don't think you could squeeze out even if you wanted to. nonetheless, you returned the embrace, patting her on the back and nuzzling your nose into her messy hair.
"hey, hyeinie. i missed you," you murmured, moving your hand up to card through her dark brown locks.
your younger cousin's eyes sparkled, and she broke out into a huge grin. you felt yourself being squeezed even tighter, before you coughed and wheezed out, "can't- breathe."
your uncle gently separated hyein from you, and you stood up so you could bow and give him a hug.
"welcome back, y/n!" he laughed, giving you a rough slap on the back which made you stumble a little.
your uncle was a warmhearted man, much like your father, even though they weren't blood-related. you didn't exactly know what he worked as, but he was always dressed to the nines whenever he went out, regardless of the occasion.
"i'm glad to be back. i'll be staying for a while, too," you added.
turning and smiling at hyein, you ruffled her hair, making her stand up and do it back to you. thankfully, you dodged in time. wait, did you shrink? or...
"hyein, you got taller again!" you exclaimed. last christmas, she was at about your height; a little above average, a solid 5'6. but looking at her now, she was probably around 5'7, almost as tall as her dad.
the younger girl blinked, staring wide-eyed at you. she slid her hand from the top of her head to the empty space above yours. being honest, the difference wasn't all that much, but your brow twitched at having to even slightly flicker your eyes up to make eye contact.
"did i?"
this was starting to irk you. you knew that hyein just realized this was something she could hold against you, and that was the last thing you wanted to happen.
defeatedly, you sighed.
"dinner is ready!" your aunt called from the kitchen. your eyes lit up as the scent of your favorite kimchi-jjigae wafted through the air. bless your aunt's soul.
you slowly turned to your cousin, a glint in your eye.
"last one there is a rotten egg."
and then, chaos.
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"y/n, you haven't been here in a while. now that you're here to stay, would you like to do anything in korea?"
you adjusted the bandaid on your knee, and hissed as hyein pressed on the bruise just below it. of course, you hurt yourself while trying to race the younger lee to the dining room.
snapping your eyes to your aunt, who was setting the pot of stew in the middle of the dining table, you tried to think of something you've never had a chance to do. but you've been to korea countless times before, and you'd always gotten to do something new. it'd been around a year since you last came, since your relatives came to you for christmas 7 months ago.
"i guess... just walking around like a local? going to a café, walking around the city. and..." you bit your lip, struggling to remember the name of the theme park that was so famous.
"oh!" you snapped your fingers, "lotte world!"
hyein's hand twitched. one glance at her, and you could see that she was practically buzzing with excitement. she looked as if she was about to bounce off the walls like a pinball. you pinched her arm, causing her to yelp.
"lotte world! that sounds fun," your uncle commented, "i wish i could join. work's been busy lately."
your aunt laughed, "me too! but y/n," she shot you a stern look, "don't go causing trouble for people. i don't want to see you on the news for the wrong reasons."
'that's very encouraging and totally non-threatening!' you shivered. still, her words only tempted you. knowing you, it wouldn't be long into the school year before you were a known figure on campus.
portions of the stew were distributed to everyone's bowl, and you licked your lips. you didn't have anything on the plane, since you'd slept through most of it and missed the in-flight meal.
"thank you for the food," you said, before bringing a spoonful of the stew to your lips.
with that single bite, you think you've ascended to heaven and above. you wolfed down the rest of the food, eating like you hadn't eaten in a week (which you felt like you didn't) and before you knew it, you'd finished your dinner. seeing this, hyein also tried to finish her food quickly, but was stopped by your aunt.
taking a few swigs of water, you looked to your aunt, who watched you in bewilderment. "auntie, that was so good. seriously, that was soooo good. can i have seconds?"
everyone at the table broke out into a fit of laughter.
"of course, y/n."
as dinner went on, and you caught up with hyein and her parents, everyone had finished their serving, and you, your third serving. you tried to help your aunt with the dishes, but she just shooed you away to you and hyein's shared room.
despite already having been in the bedroom to drop off your luggage, you let your cousin lead you to it. it was very spacious, having enough room to hold a sizable tv that you could watch netflix on from the bed, and enough room to walk around comfortably. hyein's desk was messy, as always. it was filled with school papers, colored pencils and highlighters, and a book you got her the last time you visited.
speaking of the bed, it had been replaced by a very charming bunk bed, complete with fluffy white comforters and a surprisingly stable ladder. you already claimed the bottom bunk as yours, your phone laying on the plush pillow.
"tada!" hyein presented to you, doing jazz hands towards the bed. "i know you've already seen it, but try laying in it! it's pretty comfy for a bunk bed."
following her suggestion, you went ahead and sat yourself on the bed, immediately sighing in content. moving your phone so you could lay down, you swung your legs over the bedframe so you could soak in the comforting feeling of the bed. the mattress was fairly soft, perfect for your strange sleeping positions. you flashed an upraised thumb to hyein, who grinned triumphantly.
she puffed up her cheeks. "see?"
"i do see, hyeinie," you said, reaching for your backpack, "before i forget..."
the younger lee gasped at the sight of the matching kangeroo plush keychains, even though she'd already seen them over text. one was purple, her favorite color, and the other, blue. attached to their hands were small magnets, which would allow them to connect together.
she squealed, holding the purple one to her chest. "they're so cute! i love it, thank you y/n-unnie."
you were, once again, brought into a soul-crushing hug. 'at least hyein is happy.'
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10 minutes later and you and hyein were now wrapped up in a fiery race of mario kart. you had successfully hooked up your switch to the tv just a bit ago, and of course you had to compete with her in your shared favorite game. it was a tradition for the two of you to play through at least two rounds of the grand prix mode, usually playing for the special cup for one of the rounds.
a hand covered your field of vision, and you batted it away, groaning at your little cousin. "stop, i was winning!"
she cheekily stuck out her tongue, swiftly overtaking you in the race. you cursed whoever picked the mushroom cup (you did) because the piranha plants in sweet sweet canyon were beating your ass, and your rank just kept dropping after hyein rudely interrupted your groove with her hand.
"ahhh..." you sighed as a bot passed you on the second lap. setting the cpu level at the maximum was a mistake. hastily, you collected the power up block, your eyes lighting up seeing the formidable blue shell on the dice roll. spotting the shortcut, you performed a sharp-angled drift that you were only able to do after years of perfecting the technique, and expertly boosted yourself to catch yourself up to 4th place.
it appeared that hyein was too focused on smoothly driving through the track, so she didn't notice your newly-acquired trump card. you smirked. 'she won't see it coming,' you mischievously thought.
it was now the third lap. you were saving the shell for right before the finish line, and you were currently in a solid 3rd place, with hyein in 1st and a bot in front of you.
the younger lee glanced at your side of the screen and widened her eyes. 'did she just now notice i had the blue shell?'
"unnie! you can't! i'm so close to winning!" she shouted. the finish line was nearly in sight. the bot slipped on a banana peel and your smile only widened as you watched the flailing animation while passing by. hyein tried kicking you to distract you, but it was no use. you had already thrown the power up that would help you win the race.
"checkmate," you smugly said as you patted hyein's back. the girl was watching the finish screen in despair, gripping her controller tightly in annoyance.
she slowly turned to you, a menacingly determined look on her face. "i'll win the next one. it's thwomp ruins, you suck at thwomp ruins."
damn it. she was right.
hyein ended up winning the next race, as she declared. you always had trouble avoiding the obstacles on the track, much to your dismay. with that win, she also won the cup, because she also won the first two races. you blamed it on the jetlag.
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(when you awoke, you felt a heavy weight on your chest. you blinked, barely making out the image of hyein laying on you, softly snoring. you checked your phone. 5:12 am. well, whatever. it was too early to think about anything. gently combing your fingers through her hair, you fell back asleep.)
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“y/n?”
the door to your shared bedroom creaked open, and you shoved the covers over your face. 
“y/n, it’s 11:30, wake up,” the voice called.
slowly, you peeked from under the comforter that was very much doing its job at keeping you comfortable, to see your aunt standing in the doorway with a ladle. reluctantly, you climbed out of bed.
"morning, auntie," you mumbled as you rubbed your eyes, making your way to the bedroom door.
she stepped aside to let you exit the room. "good morning, sleepyhead."
you spent a few minutes to brush your teeth and wash your face in the bathroom before coming out to the living room. the house was eerily quiet without the presence of your uncle and hyein.
...wait, where's hyein?
looking around suspiciously, you still found no trace of the younger girl in the house. she was gone when you woke up, too. where could she have gone? it was summer break, and hyein was barely entering high school.
coughing, you asked your aunt, "um, where's hyein gone?"
"oh, she's at the company. she has practice today, didn't she tell you?"
"what practice?"
"...dance practice? vocal lessons? she's debuting this month, remember?"
debut... dance... vocal... that rings a bell...
'wait, what the fuck? is hyein a kpop idol?'
your heart beat faster at the revelation. hyein? your cute little cousin who you swore had just graduated from elementary school two years ago? you knew she took dance lessons, and her other activities that came to a halt last year, but... debut? she was still a kid! and it sounded like this debut was serious, the real next step in her career.
your emotions were all jumbled up upon thinking more on the matter. why didn't she tell you?
"y/n? hey, how about you eat now," she placed a bowl in front of you, "and maybe later you can talk to hyein about it. don't worry until then."
"easier said than done," you replied, digging into the rice with your spoon. but she was right. you could talk to hyein later; you still had to unpack your bags.
breakfast tasted dry and bland, even though you were sure your aunt cooked it with perfection and love in mind. there were just too many thoughts in your mind.
putting your finished bowl in the sink and washing it, you shuffled back into you and hyein's room, intending to tidy up the space and also set your things down. this was where you'd be living for the next four or more years, after all.
this bedroom brought back memories. what used to be a guest room that five-year-old you would sleep in during the holidays, was now turned into your dear little cousin's haven of comfort. from the moment she was born, you've adored her—it was like having a little sibling, since you were an only child. the guest room was more lively, more full of energy with hyein there.
as she grew up, there were times where she, of course, kicked you out of the room, because it was 'too embarrassing' to have her older cousin sleep in the same room with her. although you always woke up in the middle of that night to see a hyein-shaped lump on top of you. it was endearing, really, to see, to know that the girl loved you as much as you did her.
you traced your finger along the edges of the old closet in the corner of the room. there was a barely noticeable dent on the side, from when you were playing a game of operation and accidentally threw the tweezers too hard in a fit of rage.
a piece of duct tape you'd painted white that was stuck onto it for a good week, because that was the best that a 14-year-old and a 9-year-old could think of. your mom and auntie still got mad, though.
you got to cleaning and unpacking, patiently waiting for time to pass so hyein could come home and you could talk.
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dinner came and went, and you were now sitting on the bed, waiting for your cousin who was washing up in the bathroom.
"hey unnie... why are you just sitting there?"
you wordlessly patted the space next to you, your silence being an indicator that what you wanted to talk about was serious.
"why didn't you tell me you were a trainee?"
"..."
"hyein?"
she stared at her lap, guilty. "i..." she choked out, "every time you came, i was just having so much fun. and i didn't know when to tell you because i thought you would make fun of me, or something. i don't know."
hyein sniffled, and looked at you with tears streaming down her cheeks. you sighed and wiped them away with your thumb. she continued.
"and this training, i know you think it's a lot for me and it is, but my members, they make it so much fun. and i'm so close to achieving my dreams, y/n-unnie! july 22nd. that's in 20 days, i'm gonna be a real idol. topping the charts, i just, urgh-"
you brought her into a hug, rubbing her back as she sobbed into your shoulder.
"...i support you. i'm not judging you, i was just worried about you," you planted a kiss on her forehead.
"you're my baby cousin, of course i wanna protect you from the nasty entertainment industry. but... if this is what you want to do, then i'll cheer you on from debut to retirement."
she sniffled. "that's in like, a gazillion years, you're gonna be dead by then."
"shush," you pulled her back into your embrace, "let's just go to sleep."
at 6 am, you woke up with hyein sleeping soundly on your chest, again. this time, you carefully slid out of bed, brushing your teeth in the bathroom, and then sauntering over to the kitchen where your aunt was already awake and cooking breakfast.
"up so early?"
you groaned. mornings were never for you, especially since you always stayed up to paint during your spurts of inspiration.
"i talked to hyein." a pause. your aunt took a minute to wash her hands, and turned around to face you.
"and?"
"i told her i support her. and we fell asleep talking about which member of bts was the best. and now my eyes are super swollen 'cause we had a crying session right before that."
in the background, you could faintly hear the sound of rushing water. hyein must be awake.
"morning..." the younger girl walked in, rubbing her eyes.
you smiled. "good morning, hyeinie."
"woah, you're awake... you're usually passed out at this time."
"are you disappointed?"
"settle down, kids. breakfast's ready."
you ate in silence, occasionally asking for a napkin, or asking how each other's sleep went, and hyein went in to go get dressed for the day.
the sound of the garage door opening resounded throughout the house; uncle must be back from running errands.
"that's me," your cousin said. you adjusted the cap on her head.
"you're sleeping on the bottom bunk tonight, just so you know. i don't want you falling off in the morning, while i'm 'passed out'."
she slipped on her shoes, grinning widely at you. then, she set off with a skip in her step. you shook your head at the sight, giggling.
a few hours later, around noon, your aunt came into your room holding a wrapped... lunch? it looked like the ones you would get from your own mother for field trips, a boxed lunch wrapped with a cloth with a cute design on it. you paused in the middle of your painting of the view from your window. it was time to take a break, anyway.
"what's this?" you took it from her. the cloth concealed the smell pretty well, so you couldn't tell what was in it.
your aunt crossed her arms. "hyein's lunch."
okay... that's weird. why would she come in and give you hyein's lunch? wasn't she supposed to- oh. "you want me to bring it to her, don't you."
she only nodded, leaving the room right after.
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hybe entertainment was a big building. like, a seriously big building. it was also weirdly pleasing to look at, but you thought that way with how the city looked in general with all those big buildings with their fully windowed walls.
hyein's manager was supposed to come get you at the lobby. it felt awkward waiting there, since it was so prim and proper compared to any other place you'd been to. you felt out of place. you were just a trainee's cousin, not some important figure in the industry. hell, you weren't even in the industry!
from: mom's favorite child (🐣) why'd mom tell me to send my manager down? are you here? to: mom's favorite child (🐣) yeah from: mom's favorite child (🐣) why???
you chose not to answer that. 'did she really forget her lunch?'
after around five minutes (and after receiving some curious looks from staff members) the manager led you to a dance(?) practice room, nodding and opening the door for you.
"unnie!" you were immediately crushed by the tall girl. you think the cramp in your spine was fixed by her intense embrace.
she gave you an excited look. "why're you here?"
you held up the box, dangling it in front of her eyes. "you forgot your lunch."
she took it from you with a straight face, but then changed the topic without saying anything else. what the...
"meet my members!" hyein stepped aside, revealing four girls who looked almost as confused as you were.
but they were all very pretty, you noted. especially that girl on the right, with the bangs. and those pretty eyes. and ah...
'oh my fucking god.'
"y/n!?"
"h-hanni!?"
you stood there in shock. out of all the places you could meet again, it was at your cousin's workplace? and, it turned out that they even worked together?
you were pulled into the practice room, and now you were sitting on a metal folding chair, in an icebreaker circle that took you back to middle school. it all happened in a blur, one second you were staring at hanni and the other you were forced into a chair by hyein. everyone else looked slightly uncomfortable as well.
"this is y/n, my older cousin!" she introduced you to the other girls. then, she pointed to them one by one.
"this is haerin-unnie." the cat-eyed girl nodded at you.
"minji-unnie." she waved, offering you a tight lipped smile.
"dani... danielle-unnie." she also waved, though with much more energy and a wider smile. cute.
"and this is hanni-unnie, but i suppose you two are acquainted already."
you ignored how hyein's posture became stiffer and how she suddenly started talking in a formal tone, like what she did when she was starting to plot something.
nonetheless, you bowed in your seat and waved. "i'm lee y/n... incoming first year at seoul national university. i'm looking to major in painting."
there was a brief period of silence, and you awkwardly traced the bruise you got two days ago through the hole in your jeans.
danielle(?) started clapping, the other members (including hyein) following suit.
"can we see some of your works?" she excitedly asked. you, once again, found it hard to resist a pretty girl.
"yeah, for sure!" fishing your phone out of your pocket, you pulled up the album titled 'finished paintings' and chose a landscape painting of the blue mountains which you did on a short vacation to newcastle in march. you used the pictures your dad took on his professional camera as reference, and it ended up being one of your best projects in your portfolio.
you tilted your phone horizontally so they could see the full piece, chest swelling with pride when their faces lit up with wonder.
"it's beautiful," minji commented, her eyes trailing from your phone screen to you. you blushed at the sudden eye contact.
danielle loudly gasped, shaking hanni back and forth. "oh my gosh, it's the blue mountains!"
another aussie?
"yeah, went there during a trip to newcastle," you replied in english. the girl's eyes seemed to light up even more, if that was possible. her smile became so blinding that you felt you had to shield your eyes.
"newcastle!" she pointed to herself, "that's where i'm from!"
"really? it's so pretty there, especially by the beaches," you said. "i wish i could go back and paint the views."
your stomach growled. right... you hadn't eaten since way earlier in the morning. you scratched your neck in embarrassment when haerin and hyein started giggling.
"have you girls had lunch yet?"
at seeing their heads shake 'no', you stood up and stretched your arms back. "wanna go eat something? it's my treat," you suggested. "i think i saw a tonkatsu restaurant on the way here."
the cat eyed girl, haerin, made a sound akin to the squeak of a cat (ironically) and tugged on minji's sleeve. she whispered in the girl's ear, and minji turned to look at danielle and hanni for approval.
"fine with us," she affirmed, sending you a gummy smile. "i'll tell our manager."
hyein poked your shoulder. "what about my lunch?"
"uh... we can watch something tonight and you can eat it then, i guess. i won't tell your mom?"
"deal!"
[hybe -> new area unlocked: tonkatsu restaurant]
the seating arrangement went as follows: haerin, hyein, and danielle on one side of the booth, and minji, you, and hanni on the other side. you mentally braced yourself for kicks from hyein, but your heart also sped up at being next to hanni again.
the group made their orders, you prepared to empty your wallet, and were now engaging in conversation with danielle and hanni. next to you, hyein, minji, and haerin were having a separate conversation—something about sparklers and filming.
"so, danielle," you started, folding a napkin into an unlimited amount of halves. she interrupted you before you could continue, smiling, "you can just call me dani! i find being called my full name a bit... you know."
you nodded in understanding. "dani, so you're australian too? must be nice to have a fellow aussie in your group," you nudged the girl sitting on your right. she nudged you back, but her hand made its way to yours under the table. you tried your best not to freak out.
"yep! speaking of which," danielle pointed between you and the 'fellow aussie'. "how do you two know each other? there was that whole thing when we first saw you and everything."
by now, the other three girls have tuned into your conversation. it seemed that they too, were curious.
the vietnamese was the first to explain. "we met at the airport, after i visited my family. we bumped into each other like, three times before finding out we also sat next to each other on the same flight."
minji raised an eyebrow, "wait, this is the y/n you were talking about?"
hanni looked to the side and tucked her hand behind her ear. she was talking about you?
you gave her hand a squeeze, causing her to look down at your now-intertwined fingers. when did that happen?
across the table, hyein eyed you suspiciously.
thankfully, the food came and you enjoyed your lunch, which sufficiently tamed your prior hunger that led up to this situation. you recounted more of you and hanni's first meeting, but the more you talked the more it felt like you were introducing yourself as her girlfriend.
"wow, is that why you left me on read?"
you snorted. "no, i just wanted to annoy you."
hyein kicked you under the table. you made a mental note to check your foot for another bruise later.
"to be honest," you said to the group after you finished your last bite, directing everyone's attention to yourself. "i didn't think i'd end up spending the afternoon with soon-to-be idols."
next to you, minji laughed. it tickled your brain, the way her deep voice was so sooth and calming.
"i don't think anyone here expected to spend the afternoon dining with our youngest's relative."
you laughed along with her, dabbing at your mouth with a napkin. "but i mean, we'll probably be seeing each other often. i'd love to get to know all of you."
the girls made noises of agreement, either nodding or approving verbally, and soon everyone was done eating. you paid the bill (rest in peace, wallet) and when you came back from the counter, hanni, danielle, and haerin are gone.
"they went to use the restroom," minji informed. you made an 'ahh' expression and gave an 'ok' gesture, and made to sit down to wait for the three. hyein stared at you and minji.
"i think you're really cool, y/n."
you almost did a spit-take with your glass of water. that caught you way off guard. what are you supposed to that?
"...and i was just wondering, could i get your number?"
you blinked. minji blinked. and out of the corner of your eye, you could see that hyein also blinked.
but... who would turn down an offer from a(nother) pretty girl? not you.
so obviously you punched in your digits onto the girl's phone, saving yourself as 'y/n 🎨' and by the time you were done, the rest of the group had returned to the table.
when you and the girls arrived at the company, minji left with a wink toward your direction, danielle and hyein hugged you goodbye, and haerin waved at you. only hanni was left, but both of you were reluctant to go.
"i hung the sketches up in my dorm room."
your eyes slightly widened. "really? i'm glad you like them. it's embarrassing, but you're sort of turning into my muse."
you coughed as to hide your scorching blush. hanni giggled, her cheeks also tinted red.
danielle called for her from the entrance, and you both looked to the building.
"i should go."
"yeah... oh, here." you handed her a torn piece of napkin paper with your number written on it. "my number, 'cause my dumb ass forgot to give it to you earlier."
she pocketed it and sent you an eye smile, before waving and turning around to catch up with her group members.
score!
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one week later and you and minji became quick friends. she was funny, very dry but very funny. and you were too shy to text hanni much despite your show of confidence when you gave her your number.
you also hung out with the oldest member a lot. just the other day, you went to the mall with her and got frozen yogurt, and since the day you met her you've been texting every night. though not as much as you did with minji, of course you hung out with the other girls too, like when you visited the company a second and third time. (coincidentally, it was because hyein had forgotten her lunch, again)
you actually just got back from visiting minji at the dorm. it was your first time there, and you mostly just stayed in her room after being given a tour. (you ignored the disappointment in your heart after finding out hanni had a schedule, and wasn't at home)
hyein already had some of her things moved to her dorm room, but she was allowed a few more days at home until she had to stay there long-term. but lately, you've been noticing her staring at you. it often happened when you were texting or hanging out with minji. you would just see the younger girl stand in the corner of the room, 'distracted' with her phone as soon as you turned to look at her.
you were resting on your bed when the door burst open. startled, you sat bolt upright and turned your attention to whoever rudely interrupted your peaceful hour of doom-scrolling.
"unnie, do you like minji-unnie?"
"what the fu-" you stopped yourself. auntie would scold you if you slipped up in front of her kid. "no! what!?"
"oh." she sat herself next to you on the bed. "but you talk to her all the time. it's like you don't even like hanni-unnie anymore!"
it took you a second to process the younger girl's words until you exploded into a blushing mess. "how- how did you know i like hanni?"
"it's way too obvious," she shrugged.
hyein left the room, leaving you confused, until she came back in with a rolling whiteboard. where did she even get that?
you watched as she wrote on the board with a pink marker. 'operation... confess... to...' wow. you didn't like where this was going. at all. why should you confess? shouldn't she be focused on debuting? you wouldn't want to be a distraction to her. and you're pretty sure she didn't like you like that.
hyein put a bullet point under the heading, the marker squeaking as the ink dried within a second.
you frowned. "i don't think i should confess, hyein. you can put the board away."
she looked disheartened for a moment, but shook it off and faced you. "i'm like, 95% sure she likes you back. she doesn't shut up about you when she's alone in her room. i don't think she knows that we can hear her talking to herself."
choosing to keep quiet, you laid back into bed and covered your face with a pillow. that was a matter to think about later, and it was hard to stop hyein once she'd started.
"let's see... hey, pay attention; this is for everyone's sake!" the pillow was snatched from your hands. you groaned and sat up. guess it wouldn't hurt to at least hear her out. "you should do something to catch her attention."
you scoffed. "like what?"
she finished drawing two stickfigures (you and hanni, presumably) holding hands with an obnoxious amount of hearts surrounding them, and rested her hand on her hip. "you could... mysteriously take her away after one of her schedules?"
"absolutely not! that's kidnapping."
she crossed the prompt off the list. "take her on a romantic tour around the city with a rented double decker bus?"
"i don't have money for that..."
"you don't have to pay for a driver, can't you drive?" hyein pouted.
you sighed. "what's the point of renting it for her then? also, hasn't she been here long enough to know the city? plus, i don't have a korean driver's license yet."
another prompt was crossed off the list, and you waited patiently as hyein thought of another idea.
"you know, the other day..." you blinked, and now she was in front of you. 'oh god.'
a wide grin spread on her face, and you paled. "i saw some window cleaners the other day. they looked like spiderman."
"hyein..."
"and like, that's so cool! you could do that. we could get a harness from that store down the street..."
"hyein, please."
"and a rope from there, too."
"but-"
"don't you want to catch her eye?"
it was tempting. it'd been so long (christmas) since you've done something fun (insane) and hyein knew just how to push your buttons.
...damn this kid.
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from: hany/n supporters mom's favorite child (🐣) added you, haerin, and mj to the group. mom's favorite child (🐣) heyy 😍 you what is this 🙁 mj ^ haerin ^ mom's favorite child (🐣) planning for hany/n to succeed also dani unnie isnt here bc she cant keep a secret mj oh finally mom's favorite child (🐣) updates will be here 😈
over the next few days, you'd been spending more time at the newjeans dorm, discussing the "plan" in depth with minji, haerin, and hyein. whenever danielle and, you smiled, hanni, dropped by, you always just changed the topic and let them join the circle, leaving the discussion to be finished in the groupchat or the next day.
but hanni's schedules had slowed down, and she was at home more often. on the other hand, it was haerin and hyein's turn to be busy, leading to you and minji hanging out on your own.
it was clear that you and the taller girl had grown way closer since your first encounter, to the point that you could joke around with her with no repercussions or shame. this year's sketchbook was a gift from minji, and the first few pages were drawings of her as a show of courtesy from you.
minji was slowly becoming your best friend since moving to korea long-term. back in australia, you didn't have a best friend, just some people that would tolerate and get along with you. but you could really connect with the stupidly tall girl that reminded you of a bear.
naturally, neither you nor minji didn't think that hanni would pay any mind to your blooming friendship.
according to minji three days later, you were wrong.
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"this is giving me deja vu," you grinned at hyein, who was currently fastening the straps of your climbing harness bought from the sports shop close to hyein's home.
she rolled her eyes, tapping your helmet. this time, there would (hopefully) be no injuries. or splinters... you hated splinters.
"i'm gonna go back to them, i'll let you know where we are so you can drop down with your," she gestured to the piece of cardstock which you decorated last night, "poster."
the ropes were checked for secureness for a seventh time, and you were assisted with being lowered down the side of the building before hyein descended the stairs and to the elevator which would take her to the second floor.
[||] hanni
"what's up with you and y/n?" hanni questioned minji. it's not like she was jealous, or anything. not of how minji got close to you faster than she did, and hanni was the one to spend a whole day with you, alone, with no interruptions before they even found out you were connected. not of how she could hear the two of you laughing away at night, sometimes even including hyein and haerin in your little hanging out sessions. not of how you flashed minji, not her, minji, your signature smile which made her heart go ten times faster, because she had gifted you with a new sketchbook to replace last year's.
okay, maybe she was jealous. just a little bit.
but it didn't help how you called her 'mj' so naturally, like you'd known her for years before. or how you always snuck off or changed the topic whenever hanni appeared, acting like you were talking about something else even though she knew you weren't.
"huh?" the taller girl stopped in front of the window at the end of one of the second floor corridors. hanni tutted, "it's like you're... you're dating! or something."
minji froze, mouth agape. that wasn't a good sign. but then she started laughing like a crazy woman, making hanni even more frustrated.
"we're not dating. i don't like anyone," she paused, a shit-eating grin slowly overtaking her face. hanni scowled. "what, were you jealous i'd steal away your c-r-u-s-h?"
she dodged hanni's punch to the shoulder, still laughing at the absurdity that was her friend's thoughts.
"but you guys are so close. and hang out all the time," hanni emphasized, making wild gestures in the air with her hands.
that would be a fair point. but to minji, letting her win would be the end of the world.
"that's because-"
"hey guys!" the sounds of three sets of footsteps became louder upon approaching the pair.
"hey, hyein. hey, haerin, danielle." minji greeted, turning to the window as if she were looking for something. haerin and hyein joined her from behind. 'what the fuck?'
"what are you guys doing?" danielle asked, trying to tiptoe to see over their shoulders. unfortunately, she couldn't get past the obstacles that were freakishly tall giants named lee hyein and kim minji.
sighing, she stepped back to face the vietnamese girl, with a pout. "oh yeah, what were you talking about? we watched you try to punch minji earlier."
"it wouldn't hurt to ask for a third opinion," she mused. "do you think there's something between y/n and minji?"
danielle's eyes nearly bulged out of her head. "y/n and minji?"
"i mean... they do spend a lot of time together. but i don't think... she—minji i mean—likes y/n like that. actually, it also seems like y/n's got a different vibe to her when she's with minji, but it's not a romantic feeling-y one, you know?"
drats.
"there she is!" hyein shouted, pointing at something that hanni couldn't see from where she was.
haerin quietly dragged her by the hand to join them in looking at the thing hyein was pointing at and- was that you!?
hanging from a rope that did not look like it supported your weight, there you were, in all your glory, outside of the window holding a sign that hanni had to squint to read.
"what the heck," she pressed her hands into the glass. "why is she outside of the window? also, is that rope even secure? and," she was nudged by minji.
"read the sign, bro."
she grumbled but squinted more to make out the words on the paper. there were flowers painted onto it, with two stickfigures holding hands, and the letters written in bold...
"han, let me take U on a d8 <3" with two comically large exclamation marks following after. han? as in, her? hanni? hanni pham who you met two weeks ago? on a date? a date!
hanni was about to shout her answer until she realized you literally couldn't hear her, because there was a window separating you two, and the rope snapped.
the rope snapped! you just fell down the side of the building! what the hell!
next thing she knew she was running out the lobby and on her way to the hospital while the ambulance carried hyein and your unconscious body.
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white walls. blinding lights. faint smell of disinfectant. it had been a while since the last time you landed in the hospital.
except you don't recall the absence of a cartoonish hygiene poster that was always visible immediately when you woke up. or the presence of another girl resting her head on the side of your bed topped with plain white sheets.
on the other side of the door, you could just barely hear two people conversing in korean.
that's right, you were in korea, not melbourne. and you'd fallen from the building after the rope holding you up had snapped.
you knew you were the definition of "fucked around and found out" but... holy shit, your body hurts like hell. looking down, you could see that your right leg was in a cast, and you were unable to move your upper body, feeling immense pain whenever you tried. to add on, there were many, many, bruises along your arms and from what you could see, your other, non-broken leg.
normally, your mother would barge in at this time, scolding you for doing something stupid again. but it wasn't "normally" today. a warm, wet sensation, a tear, rolled down your cheek. maybe it was the pain that finally triggered it, but it was the first time you cried since leaving your home for college.
"fuck," you murmured, lifting up your arm that wasn't occupied to wipe away the waterfall of tears that threatened to burst. in doing so, the girl holding onto your hand shifted. she scrunched her nose, wiping the sleep away from her eyes, and you could finally see her face. hanni. why was she here?
she stopped and stared at you for a moment before her eyes widened. "you're awake! you're- hold on, i'm- here's some water."
hanni helped you sit up, your upper body burning in pain, and you gulped the liquid down in seconds, gratefully handing the glass back to her.
"are you feeling okay?"
that was a good question. "i feel like shit."
she burst out in laughter, and you tried to as well, but ended up groaning in pain. damned body. you felt soothing rubs on your back from hanni, and you shot her an endearing smile. her actions made you feel all warm inside. like a cozy campfire on a cold, dark night.
"be careful," hanni chided, "you broke two of your ribs. and if you didn't know already, your leg too." that explained the extreme pain when you laughed.
you fell into a silence, getting lost in the girl's eyes before she coughed, blushing. "careful, can't have you falling before the first date."
breaking out into a dopey grin, you squeezed her hand. "i'm afraid i've already fallen."
"well then you better hurry up and get better so you can take me out on that date you promised, before you ended up here."
date? promised? the... the... what was it... you searched the depths of your sluggish mind, which was really hard considering you woke up five minutes ago.
sign. the... sign? oh, she saw it! the sign that you and hyein had stayed up making yesterday, to ask hanni out. it was a last minute thing, since you kept putting it off and forgot about it before last night.
a pair of lips pressed onto your cheek, but left as fast as they came. you snapped your head to hanni, touching the affected area with your palm.
without thinking, you surged forward and crashed your lips together, melting into a (not so) perfect kiss, but it sure felt perfect to you. hanni kissed back with even more fervor, hands tangled in your hair and leg moving in a slight crawl in an attempt to get closer to you without hurting you.
you pulled away, stupid smiles on both of your faces.
"you have no idea how long i've been wanting to do that," you said, sneaking in another peck on her lips.
"you have no idea how long i've been wanting to kiss you." she said, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear.
an idea popped up in your head after spotting your sketchbook on the table next to your hospital bed. you'd been wanting to paint her properly since the first time you drew her on the plane. "han, let me paint you. please? after i get discharged, whenever that is."
she blushed, blinking at you without saying a word. then, she pulled you into a short, but sweet kiss, and pulled away to plant a small kiss on top of your intertwined hands. you recalled minji saying something about hanni's strong distaste for kisses, but her behavior at the moment was contradicting minji's words.
"you'll have much more time to paint me, wherever, whenever you want."
you giggled, giving a squeeze to her hand. "does this mean i get sneak peeks of songs?"
"no."
"aw..."
"...maybe a little. just a little bit, because i like you so much."
you pumped your fist, whispering a "yes!" before she captured your lips in another passionate kiss.
"i like you a lot, too. more than painting. wait..."
"y/n!"
you, lee y/n, were a girl who could not get a girlfriend no matter what you tried. but on that fateful day, the day you met hanni, you only had the stars and fate to thank for letting you meet the love of your life.
10 hours, in the sky, let hanni pham wiggle her way into your life. and you had to say, it was a change for the better.
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a/n : i'm finally done... THIS was hell to write let me tell you omg it's been in my drafts since early january GOODBYEE but now i can focus on all my other stuff so....... chaewon next! LOL (and also lovergirl pt. 2 i didn't forget i swear) thank you so much for reading 10 hour flight, sorry it's so long it wasn't supposed to be 😭 ily guys
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dukee2 · 5 months
Text
student council president and the student council media officer!
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pairings : Kim Minji x gn! reader
genre : fluff!
a/n : this is my first fic, hope you like it!
parts: part 1
warnings : none (?)
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Being the member of the student council was atrocious, - especially as a loner who had little to no friends, probably 4-5 friends who were all - well the same as you, unlike you tho, you had a 90-98 score average, making you the smartest of the group.
You also had a crush on the student council president, Kim Minji. She always eyed you as you did your projects, making advertisements for the school, and others. Keeping a steadfast glare on you, your hands, shaked as they edited the poster you were gonna submit, clicking the mouse as you added decorations.
Next Day
As you walked through the hallways of the school, you reached to open your locker, but, a tap on your shoulder emerged, making you jump, as you moved your head to your back, you found her. Kim Minji, smiling at you with utmost sincerity, her soft eyes boring into yours, a warm feeling engulfed your body, your stomach having butterflies flutter inside them,
ahem.
“y/n? hello?” Minji spoke softly, she probably called your name 3-4 times, before you realized and answered, “yeah? w-whats wrong?” you stuttered out, heat rising to your cheeks as she was almost too close to you, “well, i just wanted to ask if you finished the poster yet.. its almost 4 days before the deadline.” your eyes widened, forgetting to press submit last night as you were pulling an all-nighter, god..
you responded with, “y-yeah, yeah, i just need to finish some stuff- and i’ll be done..! yeah..” You regretted stuttering, how could you stutter infront of a pretty and polite girl like her? god, you’re messing up your chances, you thought.
“Oh.. alright then.. good luck!” She responded with, enthuasism in her voice, she smiled cheekily as she returned to her group of friends, well - popular, group of friends.
As she walked away, you couldn’t help but think you had a crush on her, tho, the warm feeling engulfing you had turned cold by now, - the butterflies that once fluttered, flied out of your stomach.
how could a loser like you have a chance with her?
3rd Period
The bell ringed, waking your half lidded eyes as you gathered your materials, shoving them into your backpack as you walked out of the class. Walking towards your locker, you opened it, as a note fell down to the floor, picking it up, you opened it carefully, it wrote,
“hey, y/n, if you’re free, would you like to meet up at the park afterschool, i’ll be at the swings, waiting.
sincerely,
xxx xxxxx.”
weird.. the name was blacked out with black ink.. you shoved the note into your coats pockets, leaving it as a reminder if you forgot, which, you would never.
as school had already ended, you stormed through the halls to the exit door, as it was raining, you had to ask your friend for an umbrella, since, they always brought an extra one just incase.
“hey, could i borrow an umbrella?”
you softly spoke, a smile painted on your face.
“sure, make sure to return tomorrow, yeah?”
they responded, handing you the umbrella
“thanks, i promise i’ll return it safe.”
you said, taking the umbrella and opening it.
“have a good day, then.”
they replied, as they walked to their car, exiting school grounds
as you walked with umbrella in-hand, you went onto your bike, placing the umbrella in a modified-in pocket on your bike, perfect for rainy days and sunny days -
you now rode your bike to the park, tho it was hard to see due to harsh weather conditions - you managed to make it out alive without crashing.
you waited at the park’s benches for awhile, waiting for the rain to stop - and it did.
you now walked to the swings, finding her.
your body instantly froze in fear, your words turning into a stuttering mess.
“hey, what did you want to meet up for?”
she spoke, raising one of her eyebrows with a confused look.
“i was about to ask the same thing, didn’t you give me a letter?”
you responded, pulling out the crumpled piece of paper from your pocket.
“ah.. i guess we got played..”
she said, clearing her throat after the sentence.
“yeah.. um..”
you responded akwardly, eyes meeting the floor.
“well, while we’re still here, why don’t we continue? consider it as a friend date..”
she said, smile creeping up her face, her cheeks, visibly red.
“sure.. i mean, yeah, we can do that..”
you idly said, stuttering mid sentences.
“y/n.”
minji spoke, her tone monotone.
“huh?”
you said with a confused look, eyes meeting hers.
“i like you.”
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ᯓ★ signing off, exulansis. all rights reserved. please don’t plagiarize and translate.
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sonotpattismith · 10 days
Note
Inexperienced yuji and reader working their way up to taking each others v cards 🙏🙏🙏
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hold me and explore me.
(Yuji Itadori x Reader)
word count: 7.1k
warnings: college!au, smut, suggestive content, 18+
other request: okay so ive had this idea for so long- Yuji, Megumi, Yuta, Toge, maki, nobara and reader are all friends. truth or dare game that turns spicy (maybe a reader x yuji or reader x megumi au) and they confess their... spicy preferences and confess their feeling to eachother... ya idk if thats weird but thought id request it if youre open to it.
other request: virgin yuji x virgin reader - dating for a long time and slowly trying things out together.
a/n: I combined like 3 requests into one because they were similar, and I had a vision. Also, track and field Yuji simply had my heart I apologize 😌
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You just wanted to crawl in a hole and die. It was that feeling-- you know-- the one you get when you walk into a highschool cafeteria, or the break room in a brand new job, and everyone seems to be privy to something you have no clue about? They seem to laugh at inside jokes, whisper knowingly about topics it seemed like you were just too stupid to catch onto. And, sure, you could just ask what they were talking about, but that would mean subjecting yourself to the mortifying fate of exposing yourself as a complete and utter loser. That’s what that night felt like.
When you agreed to an innocent game of truth or dare with a few of your beloved friends, something deep within you sent off warning signals that these kinds of ‘innocent’ games usually end very badly for big, dumb virgins like yourself. You’re not sure what it was that set off the red flags to begin waving in your mind. Maybe it was the bottle (or three) of shochu they brought into the usual hangout. Maybe it was the fact that half of you were already half-way tipsy when the game was suggested. More than likely though, it was the fact that your way-too-hot and way-too-oblivious boyfriend was in company tonight as well.
So, as you sat back on your hands, with everyone’s eyes expectantly on you, even your crossed legs and chunky sweater couldn’t make you feel less exposed. Oh god, you thought you might throw up right there. Should you make up an answer? Which one would make you sound like you knew what you were talking about, without making it sound like you seriously knew what you were talking about? If your prolonged silence wasn’t awkward enough, your burning cheeks surely were doing you in, but, shit-- how else were you supposed to react to that question?
What kind of weird shit are you into in bed?
Maybe you should’ve just said dare and not been such a pussy. Sure, you probably wouldn’t have been subjected to chugging an obscene amount of alcohol despite your already tipsy state, but it's not like your friends would have subjected you to anything too horrible. Whatever it would have been couldn’t have been worse than exposing yourself as an inexperienced loser in front of your boyfriend.
Speaking of the devil, you felt the unmistakably warm hand of Yuji Itadori himself slide over your fidgeting hand in comfort. He could see it all over you that you were absolutely mortified-- a deer caught in headlights. While he absolutely, so desperately wanted to hear your answer to this question, his instinct to jump in and ease the tension for you outweighed any horn-dog desire flooding his mind.
“Why do ya’ wanna know, Kugisaki? Tryna get in my girl’s sheets?”
The drunken group giggled deliriously at his challenging question. All at once, they began talking over each other, hooting and hollering over god knows what. You couldn’t even bring yourself to try to listen as your chest seemed to cave in on itself with a sigh of relief. Hesitantly, you stole a glance to your right at Yuji, who’s warm eyes were already on you. They sparkled with that boyish glint that was so characteristic of him. Placing a hand behind you, he leaned in, lips brushing against your ear in a way that made a shiver run down your spine.
“I still wanna know, by the way.”
The light tone in his voice was enough to tell you that he was just teasing you, but his noticeably more intense gaze, the way it dragged up your frame when he pulled away-- it told you a larger part of him really, really wanted to know. You chuckled nervously, hoping he wouldn’t notice. He turned back to your group of friends with an amused smirk on his face. Thankfully, everyone seemed to have forgotten about the fact that you didn’t finish your turn. You hoped the same of your boyfriend as he walked you back to your dorm room that night.
“If you even attempt to get me up in the morning to go on a run with you, I’ll kick your ass into Mars.” You warned as you rubbed your fingers into your temples that were already buzzing with the beginnings of a migraine. Yuji pouted dramatically as you flopped back onto your bed. Leaning forward, he replaced your hands with his own to give you a light massage. You groaned softly at the feeling, allowing your eyes to shut peacefully.
“Feels nice, huh?”
You hummed in agreement and leaned into his delicate touch. Too entranced in the sensation of his hands on you, you didn’t notice the way he leaned down, his face just inches from you.
“Nice enough that you’ll answer your truth from earlier?”
Your eyes flew open, and you gasped at the sudden proximity. He flashed you a wolfish grin. The coolness of your pillow sheet served as a slight solace for your burning cheeks as you turned your head away from him in embarrassment. An unconvincing scoff fell from your lips.
“That was a stupid question.” You muttered, trying to stop the pounding in your chest as he moved to make himself comfortable beside you. It was a firm indicator that he was definitely not letting up any time soon. Softly grasping your jaw between his fingers, he moved you to face him again.
“Not stupid to me.” Yuji pressed, smiling at the way you blushed under his gaze. He ran a finger down the side of your heated cheek. “I wanna know what you like… what turns you on.”
The casual manner in which he spoke about such things only served to further convince you that he had way more experience than you did. What you didn’t know though, was the way his heart was pounding wildly in his chest, and how he waited with bated breath for your answer. Despite his charming confidence and boyish charisma, the only action Yuji Itadori had ever seen was from his own right hand. He knew your relationship would be progressing soon— god, how he wanted it to, but his nerves were eating him up inside at the thought of making a fool of himself in front of you. So, when Nobara presented that question, he thought the gods had smiled upon him, and this could give him a head start to figuring you out before he was a sputtering, moaning mess beside you.
“C’mon, babe,” he spurred you on with a nervous smile. “I’m your boyfriend… you can tell me.”
“I don’t even know how to answer that question, nor am I near drunk enough to be having this conversation right now.” You were shaking your head as if it would rid you of the butterflies taunting you with the way he was drinking you in with that longing gaze of his. “Go on, you’re too drunk to be allowed access to sleepover privileges tonight.”
“Hey!” His Oscar-worthy pout made another appearance as you tugged on his arms to urge him to get up. It was proven more difficult than you anticipated, what with the pounds of pure muscle that clung to every inch of him. Despite your struggle, he stumbled to his feet along with you. The giddy boy haphazardly fought against you as you pushed him toward the door. The tips of his fingers clung against the door frame as he leaned into you from just outside the door. “Think about it— yeah?”
His light eyes held a sincerity that made you melt, his nose brushing yours as he stared down at you. You felt breathless, watching the way the muscles in his shoulders flexed as he held himself up on the door. Suddenly, one of his hands was coming up to cup your chin.
“Promise?”
You could only nod dumbly at him, causing a wide, tipsy smile to break out on his face. Swinging forward, Yuji smacked a fat, sloppy kiss on your lips before balancing himself on his feet once again and shutting your door behind him.
Despite your insistence on not being woken up the next morning, you still found yourself strolling out to the track with your bag in tow that morning. You had never really been a morning person, or a running person in general. So, when you started dating Yuji, he'd look up at you with those big, sparkly brown eyes and beg you to accompany him in the mornings. After coming to a compromise that you would just sit and watch, his metaphorical tail practically began wagging. Truthfully, the boy didn’t even care if you were running or not. He just wanted you to watch so he could show off a little. That first morning you sat in the grass, watching him intently as he zoomed past you on his fourth lap without so much as breaking a sweat— the way your mouth hung open slightly, impressed eyes following him deftly around the track— it was better than any pre-workout he’d ever lay his hands on.
It had become a morning routine of yours now to sit out in the grass as the sun was rising to watch him run. You would always bring a book or your laptop with you to make it seem as though you were busy with something. Whatever distraction it was typically ended up abandoned on your lap in favor of the way the muscles in your boyfriend’s back would ripple with every purposeful step he took, and he knew it too. So, you tried to sleep in that morning to nurse the tiny hangover that plagued you, but your body was already up and ready to be entertained at the crack of dawn.
As you leaned back onto the grass, allowing the barely risen sun to soak through your skin, you thought about what Yuji had requested of you the night prior. It’s not that you didn’t want to explore those things with him, but you couldn’t help but feel like he may look at you differently should your lack of experience come up. You’d had boyfriends in the past, not many, but two or three. They were all high school fads, boys you only ever saw in class or once a week in a bowling alley or movie theater. All that came from those flings were disappointing make out sessions and uncomfortable boob grabbing that were always abruptly halted with a rushed ‘this isn’t gonna work out’ from your frazzled lips.
When you began college, finding a boyfriend wasn’t exactly a top priority for you, but you certainly felt a bit more confident in your ability to pick them out with your older age. So, when Yuji Itadori stumbled toward your table at the campus cafe, still in his muddied up track uniform and giggly friends pushing him forward, the corny pickup line that fell from his lips actually worked on you. Maybe it was the goofy confidence on his face that appeared as though he really was convinced that it would work. Maybe it was his two friends that stood a few feet behind him observing with mortified expressions that said I can’t believe he just said that. Whatever it was, it made your heart skip a beat when you laughed boisterously in his face and, rather than being offended like he probably should have been, he laughed nervously along with you. He scratched the back of his head awkwardly, just thinking about how he really didn’t intend that to be funny but whatever works, right?
It had been almost four months since that fated afternoon in the cafe, and the both of you couldn’t have been more happy that that dumbass line accidentally worked on you. But then again, it had been almost four months, and it had just never come up in conversation between you two. You were almost positive that Yuji was being sweet Yuji and didn’t want to rush you, but he could have sworn he was just too much of a dumbass to charm you into allowing him the privilege of sharing such intimacy with you yet.
Maybe it’d be better to just let it play out— let him take over and show you the ropes. Still, you couldn’t help the knawing anxiety in you that told you being a virgin at your grown age was definitely not attractive and would absolutely change things between you two. Groaning in frustration, you flopped back down onto the grass behind you.
“Sit up, you’ll get ants in your ears.”
Gasping in horror, you shot up with your hands pressed over your ears. Nobara snickered as she set her bag down to sit beside you. At the sight of the very woman who was to blame for this predicament you’ve been put in, you grumbled. Her glowing face scrunched up in question at your sudden attitude.
“I am never going to another one of your hangouts if I even smell a drop of alcohol in the vicinity.” You huffed, watching as Yuji circled around in front of you. Without stopping, a wide smile stretched across his cheeks upon seeing that you did come after all. Waving aggressively to you, he continued his run with a bit more of a pep in his step. He had an important audience now, after all. Smiling softly, you waved back at him.
“What a loser.” The red head feigned a gag, but there was an amusement in her eyes as she watched how eager her best friend was to impress you. Tearing her gaze from the idiot who was currently running at the speed of light in hopes his girlfriend was watching, she tilted her head at you. “And what did I do?”
“You got Yuji all horned up with that question about what I like in bed.”
“First of all, ew.” She blinked roughly as if trying to rid the image of her horny friend from her mind. “Second of all, what’s the issue? Is he seriously that bad at—”
“I’m a virgin, Kugisaki.”
She fell silent, blinking rapidly at the girl in front of her, who had grabbed at the redhead’s knees in exasperation. While you partly felt bad for putting Nobara in the awkward position of having to talk about her friend’s sex life in such a way, you couldn’t help it. Even when you were first introduced to her, you were silently thanking the gods that there was a girl you could talk to about these things, given you were a little bit of a loner yourself.
“You two haven’t…”
You shook your head desperately at her.
“And now he wants to know what I like in bed, and I don’t know. He’s gonna think I’m a loser, or I’m gonna be horribly disappointing in the sack, and he’s gonna—”
“Why don’t you just tell him all this?” Nobara suggested slowly, watching the way Itadori looked over at them with a fond smile as he passed them up once again. Now, she knew damn well Yuji Itadori was a total virgin with a capital V. She recalls him talking about finally having gotten a blowjob once, but that he was too drunk to remember it but it ‘totally still counted’. She wanted to help ease your nerves about your own inexperience, but she also felt it wasn’t her place to disclose such information to you.
“Because, he’s probably been with so many girls and knows so much more than me, and I just feel like a loser by comparison. I’m a loser, Kugisaki. A sad, virgin, loser.”
“This dude gets more pathetic the more I get to know him.” She seethed quietly with her pointer finger and thumb pressed against the bridge of her nose. “Listen, trust me, and be honest with him. Itadori seriously likes you, and if he finds out you’re holding out on him cause you’re scared he’ll think you’re a loser, he’s gonna be upset. Like sulking in the corner, growing mushrooms with his own fumes upset.”
“You think so?” You mumbled into your knee, toying with a blade of grass below you.
“Trust me, that idiot will be so excited to get you under him, he probably won’t even notice if you just rag-dolled it.”
The mental image made you laugh unabashedly, and Nobara smiled at your easing mood. She playfully elbowed your arm, leaning back on her hands as she regarded you in curiosity.
“And how has no one ever tried to get in your pants before? You got a chastity belt or something?”
Shaking your head, you looked down shyly. “I didn’t say they haven’t tried…”
“I knew it!” Nobara exclaimed as you shushed her desperately, watching from the corner of your eye as Yuji slowed his pace and began heading toward you two. “You were breaking hearts left and right before this loser came along, weren’t you?”
“Shut up!”
As you dragged yourself through your classes that day, you were mentally hyping yourself up to have that conversation with Yuji later. He typically stacked his classes in the mornings so his afternoons would be free for track meet and, of course, you. As you glanced down at the time in the corner of your laptop, your leg bounced anxiously. Would he really take it as well as Nobara made it seem?
Whenever you wanted more time to think, to stew, to just marinate in your own anxiety, time always seemed to move that much faster. Four o’clock rolled around faster than you had anticipated, and your feet seemed to falter with every step you took toward Yuji’s dorm. With a shaky breath, you unlocked the door with the small key he’d given you a few weeks ago. Upon hearing the sound of the shower still running, your tense shoulders eased up a bit. Dropping your bag down in his desk chair, you flopped back onto his bed. You had a plan, you had your words prepared, you were ready to make this as normal and not awkward as possible.
As Yuji stepped out of his small, steam filled bathroom though, only clothed in his sweat shorts that barely covered his mid thighs, wet, pink hair clinging to his forehead, your plan suddenly went to shit. He smiled excitedly upon seeing that you were already there, but his pearly whites were the last thing you were focused on right now. Jesus, they don’t make men’s shorts long anymore? His tanned, defined runner’s thighs were practically on full display for you to drink in greedily.
“Is my dick hanging out or something?”
You were snapped from your trance by his brash question, looking up to find him staring down at his lower half in question before glancing back up at you curiously. Shaking your head with flushed cheeks and a smile, you laughed at his blunt tone.
“No, just like those shorts on you is all.”
“Oh, you do?” Yuji looked back down at himself once again with a shy smile before coming to lean over your spot on the edge of his bed. Your breath hitched when his knee came up to sink into the small space between your legs as he climbed over you, grasping the side of your neck in his hand. “I’ll wear them more often then.”
Without allowing you time to respond, he pressed a chaste kiss to your lips. You sighed contentedly at the feeling of his warm body hovering over yours. Brining your hands up, you allowed your fingers to graze over the rippling muscles of his thigh, your fingernails unconsciously grazing along the skin. He hummed against you, bringing his other leg up to rest beside you, effectively caging you between him and the bed.
“Did you—mmph,” The boy could barely tear himself away from you long enough to get his question out. Your free hand came up to run through his wet hair. “Did you think about what I asked you?”
You suddenly remembered why you were here in the first place.
“About that—” But he was everywhere, his lips moving to sloppily cover your cheeks in soft kisses, grasping your waist in his free hand. It began to creep up your shirt, until you felt the tips of his fingers graze the hem of your bra. You gasped and reached out to grasp his wrist. “Yuji, I wanted to— hah— t-talk to you about something.”
“‘M listening, babe.”
Somehow, with the way he had his pink head buried in the crook of your neck, his teeth grazing and suckling the sensitive skin there, you highly doubted that. Still, he squeezed gently at your ribs in encouragement. His hand strained against your grip on his wrist as if aching to continue his exploration of your chest. You swallowed anxiously, the fingers that were woven in his drying hair tightened. Once that small moan escaped his lips, you couldn’t hold back anymore.
“Yuji, I’m a virgin.”
You felt his lips abruptly halt against you, and his hand stopped trying to fight against yours. Squeezing your eyes shut, you cringed at the crushing silence. Suddenly, you were just desperate to fill it and break the sudden tension.
“I should’ve told you earlier, but I was just kind of embarrassed, and I didn’t want you to think I was a loser or pathetic or something. I completely short-circuited when Nobara asked me about what I liked cause I just don’t—”
“Oh my god— thank god!”
Your rambling was cut short by his sudden, ecstatic proclamation. He sat up abruptly, pulling you into his lap as he moved to sit over the side of the bed. His hands came up to grip your cheeks in disbelief.
“I thought you were gonna expect me to be able to lay down some master pipe or something, oh my god— I can’t breathe.”
“Yuji!” Your bubbling laugh filled your chest, dispelling all previous anxiety quicker than you could have anticipated. For just a moment, you allowed his words to sink in in disbelief. “Are you saying—”
He cut you off with a small nod, his cheekbones flushing pink. With a timid smile, he ran his hands down your shoulders and arms to grasp your waist.
“Even if I wasn’t— I don’t care if the whole damn university has run through me— I could never think you were a loser. Not a bigger loser than me, anyway.”
As if the warmth in your chest couldn’t spread anymore, his sweet words only made that heat travel down south. Maybe it was his unwavering compassion, or maybe it was just that you could finally rest easy knowing you two were on even playing fields. Whatever it was, it had you crashing forward to meet his awaiting lips once again.
There was a newfound eagerness in your desperate kisses now. Something had shifted between you two, and it seemed as though a whole new area of one another was just unlocked. Your bodies were timid, unexplored— drawn toward the other. Though neither of you would likely admit it, it excited you both that each of you would be the first to experience one another in such a way.
“We can take it easy now, yeah?” He offered breathlessly between bruising kisses. The hands that were wrapped around his shoulders snaked down to explore the muscles that rippled underneath them. His back arched ever so slightly, mouth falling open in response to your soft caressing. “Take— ahh— our time.”
You hummed in agreement, but neither of you seemed too eager to ease up on your desperate pursuit. Yuji dipped his head down to press sloppy kisses over your collarbones. He almost ripped the neckline of your shirt in an attempt to gain more access.
“Exactly.” you whispered, already out of breath from the anticipation rising in you. Your head fell to the side to encourage his continued attack on your neck. Despite your agreement, you didn’t stop him when his hands sneaked under your top and threw it over your head.
“Oh, fuck.” Yuji groaned without an ounce of shame as he stared down at your bra-clad chest. He was eternally grateful that you had something on under there, because he was convinced he would have busted right in his shorts if he saw your bare tits with no preparation right now. Your cheeks burned under his intense gaze, and you instinctively moved to cross your arms over your chest. At once, his hands came up to cage your elbows at your sides, dipping down to press kisses to the plush pillows. A soft moan of surprise escaped you. Your boyfriend’s head perked up at the sound, and he looked at you with sparkling eyes. “You like that?”
Tongue tied, you could only nod wordlessly. Releasing his grip on one of your arms, his fingers set ablaze each inch of skin they traversed on their way up to cup your jaw affectionately.
“What else do you like, angel?”
It came out of you like word-vomit, all previous notions of apprehension and timidness lost on you under his fiery gaze. His brown eyes shone in a way that you swear you’d kill a man for should Yuji ask while batting those fluttery eyelashes at you.
“I like the way you hold me like that—” You babbled mindlessly, breasts arching into his chest. The boy thought his brain was going to fry right then and there, watching the way you were falling apart on his lap. “And I like the way your thighs look in those shorts—”
“Yeah?”
You would have kept going had it not been for his eager interruption, and you were partly grateful for it as you were positive you would have embarrassed yourself. Once again, you only nodded. He shifted under you, maneuvering you slowly to sit against his left thigh, a hand hesitantly coming up to press against your back. In an instant, you felt the taut muscles of his thighs flex beneath the thin fabric of your shorts. You gasped at the feeling, hands flying up to grasp his shoulders.
“Is- Is this okay?” Yuji questioned, uncertainty breaking through his voice that had suddenly lowered darkly with the lust that flooded him. Too flustered to even form a coherent answer, you leaned forward to kiss him once again. Moaning softly against you, the hand he had pressed against your back pulled you forward, encouraging you to grind against his tense muscle. A string of desperate whines slipped past your lips as he moved you against him.
Your boyfriend continued to push and pull at your waist until you found a rhythm of your own. Abandoning your supple skin, he reached down to palm himself through his shorts. The strain against the fabric was almost unbearable at this point, and your desperate little ruts against him were only spurring him on. Leaning back on his free hand, he watched you work yourself against him as he stroked his covered length.
You looked down at how his bicep flexed with each stroke. Reaching forward in a haze, you slipped your hand under his. A gasp choked its way up Yuji’s throat at the feeling of your comparably smaller hands clutching at him. You mimicked his movements with fervor, the heat in your core burning as you watched him throw his head back with a groan.
“Does that feel good?” You questioned hesitantly, breath picking up a bit as you felt the wet patch that began to form over the fabric of his shorts.
“Yes!” He gasped eagerly, grabbing your wrist to speed up your movements a bit. “Oh fuck.”
Your wide eyes stared at him in awe. His bare, muscled chest heaved before you. An inescapable urge had you leaning forward to bite into the firm flesh, a motion that had him jerking up into your hand. Noted.
“Babe, hold on. I’m—” he choked up when you began softly laying open mouthed kisses on the area you’d attacked with your canines. “Shit, I’m gonna cum, wait—”
He didn’t get to finish his sentence. You looked down at where your hand was languidly stroking up and down his twitching member, noticing with parted lips how his pink tip was now poking out from his waistband. It glistened as the sun shining through the window hit its dripping surface. Without much thought to it, your thumb reached up to swipe at the weeping slit.
“Fuck, oh my god—” This time, he cut himself off with his own strangled moan. His fingers pressed into your hips and wrist with a bruising pressure, as if you might disappear mid-high and leave him gasping and crying to be graced by your touch again. His chest and neck flushed red as you felt his release spill over your hands and coat his abs that flexed in tandem with his unconscious thrusts.
You suddenly wished you had left your phone in your pocket instead of your bag so you could snap a picture of the way he looked at the moment. His chest heaved as he came down from his high, and he looked back down at you in a panic, cheeks ablaze.
“Shit— I’m so sorry!” Yuji began babbling mindlessly, staring anxiously down at the mess he’d made of himself and your hand. Embarrassed wasn’t a strong enough term. “You didn’t even finish— fuck, this is—”
“Yuji, it’s okay—”
“No, I just came in my fucking shorts. I wanted to…” his words drifted, and he held your cheek with his clean hand. “I wanted to have sex with you.”
A warm smile settled over your lips. Leaning into his hand, you pressed a kiss to his palm. “We can take our time, remember?”
He huffed quietly, looking up apprehensively at you from his lashes. The boy’s blown out, brown eyes took in the sight of your flushed cheeks and disheveled hair, the way your breasts were rising and falling deeply against your chest. A mischievous smile fell over his once embarrassed face.
That’s how you found yourself on your back and on the edge of his creaking bed, legs swung over his shoulders and thighs pressed against his ears as he tried his hand— well his tongue— at a new skill. Your brows furrowed in concentration, trying to determine if it felt good or just kind of awkward. A small hum left you as you squirmed against him at the foreign sensation. Suddenly, his pink head was poking up from its spot between your legs to look up at you with those ‘Yuji-Special’ puppy dog eyes.
“I suck, don’t I?”
You quickly sat up on your elbows to meet his frantic gaze. His cheeks were burning red, chin covered in slick.
“No!” You insisted, but he wasn’t convinced, dropping his head against your stomach in agony. “Yuji, just… try again. I’ll tell you what feels good, okay?”
Rolling his shoulders back with determination, he went back in. He licked a long, hesitant stripe up your folds. As the tip of his tongue grazed your sensitive bud, you gasped quietly. Still, it was enough to have Yuji’s head perking up like a dog who just heard the rattle of his food bowl.
“Right there?” He questioned, his word mumbled with his tongue still pressed flat against you.
“Y-Yeah--”
Your instruction was cut off with another eager, rough swipe of his tongue against that golden spot he’d found. On instinct, your thighs clamped down against his head as a moan ripped through you. Against you, your boyfriend let out a moan of his own, responding to both the feeling of your warm, plush inner thighs pressing against his cheeks and the sound of your saccharine moan-- one that was solely his doing. It was a dopamine rush similar to that of which he felt on the field when you would watch him oh so encouragingly. It spread through his veins like a fire-- that burning desire for him to just impress his girl.
Like a man starved, Yuji’s tongue attacked your sensitive bundle of nerves with fervor, drool and slick dripping down his chin. You squealed at the sudden change of pace, the pressure of the foreign sensation weighing down on your chest as you writhed underneath him. It was too much- the direct, rough friction lapping so desperately against you that it was almost uncomfortable.
“Slow down!” You gasped out, your arms supporting you as you reeled away from his tongue’s attack. The muscle’s in his shoulders flexed as they wrapped around your thighs to keep you in place. He peered up at you with stars in his wonton eyes, wondering what the hell he could possibly be doing wrong now. “It’s too much, just-- like you’re kissing me, Yuji. S-Slow..” You could feel your cheeks burning at the sound of your own instructions, but the look in his eyes as the top half of his face stared determinedly up at you told you he was taking mental notes.
Humming firmly, his eyes slowly fluttered shut again, and he retracted his tongue from your core to replace it with sloppy, open-mouthed kisses. You sighed contentedly at the feeling, your hand drifting down to thread through his hair. It felt as though he finally understood, and Yuji knew he couldn’t just chase your high without pace, without care. His movements were slow and deliberate now, allowing himself to enjoy it as well instead of being so concerned with pushing you over the edge so quickly.
Your jaw fell slackly open as he slowly reintroduced his tongue into the rauchy kisses he was working against you. The curve of his smile could be felt from your fold as he sensed the trembling of your legs against him.
“Like that, Yuji--” You whined softly, grasping at the roots of his hair to pull his face closer to you. It felt like he was molding to your core, becoming one with you. A tear fell down the side of your face at the intense intimacy of it all, and you were glad he was too occupied to notice. Gently swiping his tongue up from the entrance of your weeping chasm to the hood of your clit as his lips wetly circled the area, you noted that he really was acting as though he was simply making out with a different part of you. “Oh my god!”
You couldn’t see it, too lost in your own pool of pleasure to pay it any mind, but his eyes rolled back at the sound of your breathless whines. When your hips slowly began rocking against his face, he thought he may as well have died right there on the floor of his dingy dorm room.
“Is it good?” He mumbled against you, never once stopping his ministrations on your clit. It was a dumb question-- the boy knew it was good-- what with the way your grip was practically yanking the hair out of his scalp, pushing his face further into you until he was sure he would pass out from lack of oxygen (not that he would mind going out that way). Still, Yuji was desperate to hear you say it, to tell him how good of a job he was doing at pleasuring his girlfriend.
“So good--” You gasped, feeling the tingling in your toes, reaching up your legs and into your core. Your rocking against his face was desperate now, chasing your impending high with a fervor that would have embarrassed you had you even felt remotely conscious enough to notice. Your eager boyfriend was drinking it all in though, fingers coming up to grip at your hips and aid your frenzied thrusts on his face. You were making an absolute mess of his face, but you didn’t care, and lord knows he didn’t either. “You’re so good, Yuji!”
A forlorn whine ripped from his throat at your praise, and the vibrations it sent through your bundled nerves caused the dam to snap within you. Sitting up in a desolate haze, the fingers that had graced the top of his head came down the back of it, gripping the nape of his neck to hold him against you as you cried out his name once again. The heels of your feet dug into his back as you trembled through your high. His soaked lips continued to hungrily lap you up until you were crying out in sensitivity, clamping your thighs closed to stop him.
You were heaving out breaths, hunching over as your nails began softly scraping at the nape of his neck. Yuji’s face slowly came up from its place between your thighs-- a place he noted it should have been all along. Still on his knees, he stared up at you in a drunken daze, the lower half of his face glistening with evidence of your release. His pink hair stood up and stuck out in all directions as he panted up at you.
“Did I do good?”
That mental image was seared into the back of your mind as you tried to go one about the rest of your week. Each time that image flashed in your mind of your big, muscly boyfriend on his knees for you, eyes just pleading to be praised, your thighs would press together almost on instinct. It was that much more difficult to concentrate on any of your classes. You couldn’t confirm if you two’s impromptu intimacy was the reason for the sudden change in Yuji’s behavior, but you had a feeling. While he’d always been a bit clingy, he was now all over you; wrapping an arm around your shoulders to pull you into his side each time you two met up with friends or on campus, dragging your chair closer to his by the foot wherever you went, stopping to plant a kiss on you each time he passed you on his runs. It was evident to everyone around you that something had changed between you two— what with the sudden clinginess and blushing looks from across the room.
As much as the both of you wanted, you didn’t have much of a chance to get eachother alone again though. Yuji’s track team had their annual relay race just around the corner, so he was caught up in practice and meets most of his free time. Still, it was the first big race that you would be attending of his, so you were excited despite the fact that it was taking up most of his time. It was a bit cool outside that morning, so you were bundled up in one of your boyfriend’s university sweatshirts as you made your way out to the crowded field. You could barely hear over the combined chatter of both your university and the competing school’s crowd. Looking around, slightly overwhelmed with the amount of hustle and bustle surrounding you, you nearly jumped out of your skin when hands bared down on your shoulders.
“Where were you! Yuta and Maki have been looking for you.” You relaxed upon hearing the familiar voice of your boyfriend over the crowd. Sighing in relief, you turned around to grasp onto his bicep as if the crowd might scoop you away. He was already beaming down at you, his sweat band pushing his hair away from his forehead. The tip of his nose and the tops of his cheekbones tinted pink with the cold air that nipped at his skin.
“Take me to them! I am so lost.” You pleaded as you dramatically batted your lashes up at him. An easy smile spread across his lips as he wrapped an arm around your neck to guide you through the crowd. “And shouldn’t you be getting ready with the team right now?”
“Had to make sure my girl had a good view first.” Yuji winked down at you upon seeing the bashful tint that spread on your cheeks. He turned you to face him as the two of you came up upon the stands, pointing up to where your friends were standing and waving you over. “Wait!”
You whipped your head back upon hearing him calling out to you from below.
“I don’t get a good luck kiss? No pep talk?”
“I didn’t wanna hold you up.” You laughed, leaning down to press a chaste kiss to his lips from his spot on the ground. He grasped onto your chin to deepen it for a moment before reluctantly letting you go. Slightly breathless, you continued, “Right, pep talk. What do you want if you place, hm? Human Earthworm marathon? Revolving sushi?”
“Just you.”
His sincere words and intense gaze made you falter, remembering the way he looked between your thighs just days ago. Fingers tightening around his shoulders, your eyes ran down his face wantonly.
“Just me, huh?”
“Mmhm,” Yuji hummed, brown eyes soaking in the sight of you in his sweater, standing in the bleachers to cheer him on. “Nothing’ll motivate me more.”
“Better get to steppin’ then, Itadori.”
Yuji was sprinting like a bat out of hell. As he gained on Megumi, you could see him holler at him with his palm outstretched for the baton. His fingers curled around the wooden rod, and he was off. You could swear you saw his teammate’s raven hair fly back from the dust being kicked up by the boy already light years ahead of him.
“Jesus, what crawled up his ass?” Maki remarked in astonishment. If you didn’t know any better, you’d say his feet weren’t even touching the ground. He moved so fluidly, so swiftly, as though he was simply floating across the track. The other runners, you noted, had stern expressions of determination on their faces as they paced themselves through their legs. Your boyfriend though, as you watched him drift across the field, was lit up with pure thrill. It had an ecstatic smile spreading across your own cheeks. Standing up from your seat, you cupped your hands around your mouth to cheer him on. You almost wished you could feel some sort of push and pull, some kind of apprehension about whether or not he would make it, but the truth was, Itadori had already left all the other anchors in the dust. So, really, it was more of a formality when he hopped across the finish line, and the coach ripped the tag off his uniform to declare his team’s time.
Both Yuta and Maki flew up from their seats to clap, but their cheers were drowned out by those of the hollering crowd surrounding you. Your friends’ arms came around you in glee, but your gaze was still focused on Yuji, who’s team was now having their own celebratory rituals. Over the heads and shoulders of his bustling team, his gaze still found yours in the crowd. He raised the wooden baton to point it toward you, and with a wolfish grin, sent a wink your way as if to say this one was for you.
Lord help you when that boy got his hands on you.
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rraaaannnn · 2 months
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How stupid
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In 2000s
You hit your hand on the player's recorder to play the song while you return to the chair and place your legs on the store table.
You mumble the song's melody while trying to win the gameboy
You start to feel that the weather is getting hot. You look at the bad fan. It stops working again, which makes you sigh and go outside the store for a little while, perhaps there is air or anything to reduce the heat of the weather.
And the sun shines in your face
You stand up and lean against the hot wall to see the usual group of girls sitting on top of the medium-height wall near your store
The girls who make your school all lose their minds, the hot girls who make girls and boys wish for a chance with them.
The girls are composed of Hanni, Danielle, Minji, Hyein, and Haerin
You look at that boy who comes from across the street to kiss his girlfriend, Haerin
"YN!" You look to the other side of the street to see your friend running to you. “What?” You shout as well. “There’s a party going to be held at Jason’s house.”
“Are we invited?” you ask while looking at your friend. “No…”
Of course, the school students will not invite you to their parties, so you and your friend are losers
It's not just that you're losers. You don't meet the students at school most of the time. You skip school.
And no one will invite you to his party because you were not cool kids like Haerin and her group
“Why don’t we try our luck and go to his house, maybe he will feel bad and let us in,” your friend says while you look at him with side eyes.
“We did it at the last party, and then that idiot made fun of us at school the next day,”yn pointed back, without looking, at Herren and her lover.
“So what should we do? I really want to go to the party.” Your friend frowns while you look at him helplessly.
“Julie is going to the party…” your friend says with a smile watching your jaw hit the floor. “Are you kidding me! I’m going!”
Julie is the hot, sweet girl that you have a crush on
You almost never leave any woman without crushing her, but Julie crushes her more than anyone else
More than Angelina, more than Sohyun, more than Haerin
Yes, you were crushing on Haerin, but she was dating, so you started busying yourself with crushing on other people
“How come we're not invited?” your friend asks
“When is the party?” you ask as you grab your friend’s shoulders tightly. “Uh-today at night.” You let go of his shoulder as you head to your store’s garage to pull him down. “Let’s go to my house. I have a plan!” is what you say as you pull your friend in.
To meet Haerin and her group, who approached your store to buy some tapes, looking in confusion, including cat eyes.
“Sorry ladies, we are closed.”
You run while dragging your friend, leaving the girls behind
You and your friend stand behind the back fence of Jason's house while the sound of music appears in the background
“This is FUCK-ing really suffocating me.” You remove the mask that looked like a thief’s mask. “Maybe the mask wasn’t needed.” Your friend says unsurely without removing his mask.
"Okay, let me repeat the plan to you so that you don't forget. You carry me on your shoulders, then I jump from the fence and help you climb on. Then we climb to the second floor window and enter his house. With us actually being in his house, he will think that one of his wealthy friends invited us, so he will be afraid of losing his friend and He invites us to the party."
You actually do what you plan until you enter through the window and your friend is waiting after you, but you enter and see an ugly sight.
Someone is making out with a girl, he is Haerin's boyfriend and the one he is with is not Haerin "YOU THE-what are you doing here!" Haerin's boyfriend shouts at you and what's worse is that you ripped off the mask and he definitely saw your face he will kill you
“I-don’t worry about me,” that’s what you say before running to the door of the room and opening it with the key that was on the handle and running to the stairs to reach the door and get out of it before Haerin’s boyfriend catches you.
It seems that Haerin's lover's screaming made everyone pay attention to you. You were looking at you, and this means that Jason sees you and will make things worse.
You run to the door with your friend behind you, but change your direction to stand in front of Haerin, who is sitting on the sofa. “Your boyfriend is cheating on you.”
"Eh?" This is what you hear from Haerin before you run again to the door and you and your friend exit while the idiot flies behind you.
“Yn…” your friend says in a frustrated voice while you look through your sunglasses suspiciously, “Can you stop? It’s been three weeks.”
“Three weeks, if you have three years, Haerin’s lover, I will not forget me, and he will plan to beat me up.” You stand in front of your store, which has been closed for three weeks, while you try to pull out the garage and enter quickly to pick up the gameboy that you forgot.
“So, are you going to keep hiding until we graduate? Please, no one in school is talking to me! You’re my only friend…”
"Look for another loser. The school is full of people like us."
“You are a special loser…” You laugh out loud at what your friend says, but what happened to your friend’s voice became softer, as if it were Haerin’s voice, which she rarely speaks out loud in class.
You turn around to see Haerin standing next to your friend
"Oh…Oh?…Oh!" Of course she came to pick a fight with you about what you said on BF
“Listen, believe it or not, I was drunk at the party, so I don’t think what I saw is true, that your boyfriend was cheating. What a noble thing I was when I told you before I ran away, hehheh.” You scratch your neck while laughing nervously and stupidly at the same time.
“Don't worry about it, I came here…to buy some tapes,” she says as she turns her gaze to the stacked tapes.
You look at the closed garage in the middle, isn't it obvious that the store is closed?
“Of course, choose what you want,” she says while approaching me politely, knowing that she will not quarrel with you
“Is there a Britney Spears?” she asks, making you look for her next to her, but this cat steals a glance at your face.
“Britney… Spears,” you hand her the tape and notice her charming eyes as she looks at you. “How much do I owe you?” she asks, tilting her head and looking at you.
“Nothing…” you say while being unconscious except for her eyes. “Really? But shouldn’t I pay you?” she says as she approaches you.
“How stupid to cheat on you,” you mumbled unconsciously, but Haerin hear you. “I mean, you can take it as a gift.”
“But I really want to pay you.” She doesn’t turn away from you, and you don’t turn away from her. “If you insist.” That’s the last thing you say.
Haerin grabs your shirt and leans closer to press a quick, light kiss on your lip
But left a big and strong feeling on a poor person like you
She takes the Britney Spears tape with her And your heart,And leans out of your store as you stand frozen in place, “YN! She kissed you!” He grabs your shoulders to shake you, making you melt. “Yes, yes, she did!” You and your friend start jumping in disbelief as you hear the group giggling. Girls behind your store
Haerin kissed you so you didn't mind if you were going to get beat you every day from now on by her boyfriend
I LOVEEEE 2000s FICS PLS More of it, writers
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hazelsmirrorball · 1 year
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Undercover Spider-Woman | Hazel Callahan
Spider-woman! Hazel Callahan x fem! Reader, loser! Hazel x Fem! Reader Summary:  PJ decides to do a Fight Club Halloween Party and Hazel has no choice but to wear her superhero costume.  Warnings: english isn’t my main language, not proof-read,fighting, spicy? a/n: first bottoms imagine! Hope you guys like it, I’ll probably do more parts and I might do more Hazel one shots! I really hope I’m not shadow banned! Thank you
part two
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October 31s, Halloween. A perfect excuse for teenagers to get drunk out of their minds while dressing up without being judged. Couples would go in matching costumes or go to haunted houses. Little kids would go trick or treating and the fight club, well they were making this halloween one to remember.  Usually people would hang out, go to parties but since this year October 31st came around a week day, those plans were out of the picture. Plus adding to the fact that none of them were that popular to be invited to a party , excluding Brittney, Isabel and Y/n. The fight club, specifically PJ, made it their mission to make this halloween one for the books.  
Hazel could hear the faint music playing from inside the gym as she paced back and forth debating if it even was a good idea to stumble in these conditions. She could risk everything she had been hiding so well since sophomore year for a party. Hazel took a deep breath taking her mask off and pushing it inside her bag as she felt her bangs covering her face.  She anxiously licked her lips feeling the metallic flavor overpowering her tongue as she hesitated to push open the big gym doors. Her glove covered hands hovered against the door as she thought if it was a good idea to go inside in the first place. 
What was PJ’s wonderful idea of making Halloween one for the books, you may ask? Fight Club with costumes. She made it her mission to sell the idea really well, but who wouldn’t like to have girls fighting in slutty costumes, heaven on earth,or  at least that’s what  PJ said. 
Hazel didn’t have anything against the party, she loved the idea of hanging out with her friends on halloween. She finally clicked with a group of friends good enough to celebrate a holiday together. Hazel was ecstatic, she had made it her mission to make the perfect Anakin Skywaker costume, which she had succeeded perfectly. She had slept the night before with her costume freshly dry cleaned next to her.  But her plans got destroyed when Green Goblin decided to show up and ruin her day by turning the city into his playground. Who would’ve known that Halloween was going to be a crime filled day. Hazel had managed to leave everything in perfect conditions  with ease leaving  just in time for the party. But just not in time for her to change out of her suit into her Anakin costume. 
So that’s how she found herself waiting outside of the gym doors in her spider woman suit. Her face was covered in bruises from the fight before and her hair was sweaty and messy due to it being stuck in her suit for a long time.  It wasn’t that she looked bad in her suit, it gave her power, made her unrecognizable. She wasn’t that nerdy little girl that people would stomp over. She was a badass that saved the world. She was a good superhero and she looked good doing her job. The red and blue suit would drive people crazy. She had even caught PJ and Josie gushing over her on a daily basis, but what if it slipped? 
The suit wasn’t one of those cheap costumes you could find in a store for under 30 dollars. It was a high tech suit that could kill someone in an instant and wearing that suit for a fight club meeting drove her insane. She worried on a daily basis that she could easily murder a girl with a blink of an eye, but now, with her suit on, it just made things even more difficult. Wall crawling,  superhuman strength, speed, reflexes, spider senses, spiderwebs and healing factors, all open for everyone to see. 
Hazel took one last breath while pushing the doors open. She let out a cough as smoke filled her nostrils, taking her by surprise. As she looked around, she noticed the usual bright lights of the gym were now red while smoke came from a smoke machine not far away from the door. Hazel chuckled, feeling the nerves quickly ease off, as she looked at her friends standing near a makeshift snack table. PJ did outdid herself. 
“Well look who decided to finally show up... Wait, is that the costume you made? Dude I actually thought you were going to do a crappy Anakin costume like last year. You have improved so much, this shit is so fucking cool, way better than the store one’s”   PJ said as she pushed down her sunglasses to take a better look. Hazel let out a nervous chuckle thinking of what words to say, but nothing came out. She looked at PJ taking in her costume, noticing the familiar men and black, lanyard hanging from her black suit pocket. 
“It makes you look super hot, Hazel! You even have an ass!” Sylvie exclaimed, taking off her scream mask while biting onto her fake knife. Hazel blushed, hiding her face behind her hands. If she had one more comment directed her way she was going to lose it. 
“No, but like PJ is right. This looks really good. How did you even make this look so good?  It looks like the real thing.” Josie added as she circled Hazel around taking in her costume. Hazel's eyes wandered as she shook her head, scoffing. 
“Please, how would you even know what it looks like, if you haven’t seen the real one.” Hazel said as she took a cup of punch gulping it down to ease her nerves. She wasn’t going to outlive this night.
“Because Y/n bought a Spider-Woman costume and it looks like shit compared to yours. No offense, Y/n. Your ass still looks good though.  ” PJ yelled, pointing at Y/n, who was standing a few feet away from her. 
Her body was adorned with a tight low quality version of the suit Hazel was wearing. But Hazel found herself staring in awe, not being able to move one bit. Hazel scanned every inch of Y/n Osborn's body taking a mental picture of her to remember in the future. 
Y/n Osborn had been Hazel’s crush ever since she understood what liking someone more than friends meant. She was Hazel’s everything, yet she wasn’t aware of that. They shared countless classes together but Hazel couldn’t even address her without turning into a nervous wreck. Fight Club had changed Hazel’s opportunities, when she had seen Y/n walk through those gym doors, she knew that at least a friendship would come out and she wasn’t completely wrong. Y/n did talk to Hazel, but Hazel didn’t talk back. She managed to mumble responses but that was about it. When it came to Y/n, Hazel felt like she was never bitten by a radioactive spider and that she was the same loser she had been all her life. 
But now seeing her in that outfit, wearing her iconic colors. Her hair moved softly because of the wind that came from the smoke machine. The red light outlining her body made Hazel go insane, she really was not surviving October 31st but if she didn’t she was going to leave with that image of Y/n engraved in the back of her head. 
“Shut up, PJ! It’s not my fault that this was the only thing that they were selling.I didn’t know that Hazel was going to show up in a better quality looking costume. I thought it looked good in the costume” Y/n muttered as she placed down a bag full of candy on the table. Brittany tapped her back for support as the rest of the girls looked back and forth between the two Spider-woman costumes. 
“You know what! Since we are all here, let’s get to business” Josie said as she walked towards the makeshift fighting mat that was in the middle of the gym. The girls followed close behind leaving Y/n and Hazel near the table. Y/n leaned down as searched for something in her bag which didn’t go unnoticed by Hazel. She took a deep breath quickly biting her lip before she could say something that could worsen the situation. As she looked for a notebook and a pen for notes, her eyes never left Y/n’s body. She took all the strength in her body to walk towards her and place her hand on Y/n’s lower back leaning with her. Hazel lips lightly grazed on her ear as she felt Y/n’s body tensed as she gripped harder on the thing she was searching for in her tote bag. 
“I think you look fucking hot in that costume.” Hazel responded by tapping her back and moving away towards the group of girls like nothing. Y/n gulped, taken aback by Hazel’s actions not used to this side of her. She cleared her throat jogging towards the girls sitting in between Josie and Sylvie, avoiding the hungry look Hazel was giving her. If Hazel knew that wearing the suit with Y/n was going to change the way she acted with her, she would’ve worn it to school years ago. 
“Well, let’s make this fun. Spider-Woman vs. Cheap Spider-girl” PJ exclaimed pushing Hazel out of her thoughts as she noticed Y/n groan and get up glaring at her. Hazel followed standing in front of her, but different from the other times she fought with her, she didn’t break eye contact with her sending her a cocky smile.
"Could you please drop it already, PJ? I get it, it's a shitty costume" Y/n muttered, as she sent a glare towards PJ, trying to avoid Hazel's haunting gaze. 
PJ shook her off, wiggling her eyebrows while pointing towards Hazel. Y/n quickly adverted her eyes towards her noticing how Hazel slipped her mask on up to her nose making it possible for her to see her pearly whites. Y/n raised an eyebrow, confused by the sudden change in Hazel’s actions, used to the girl being deadly afraid of looking her in the eye. The girl that was used to being a blushing mes with her stood tall smirking down at her. Before Y/n could even process what was going let alone swing a punch, she felt her body smash against the floor, her body being pinned down by Hazel. 
Hazel's thighs pinched her into place making it impossible for her to move. Hazel hands pushed Y/n's hands on top of her head as she leaned towards her. Hazel’s chain slowly moved up and down Y/n’s face as she struggled to get Hazel's body off hers, she had done it before, why was it so hard now? Seeing Hazel in this new angle made her nervous. Her once sweet eyes were full of something Y/n couldn’t describe, Hazel’s agitated breaths made her loose concentration as her masked eyes scanned her face with a proud grin on her face. She wanted to punch that cocky grin out of her face.
“Oh, see, the cheap costume is losing. Punch her already, Hazel! End her.” PJ exclaimed, clapping, making Hazel chuckle. The other girls yelled at Hazel encouraging her to finish the job. Maybe it was the sudden glory she felt, the suit, the hollers and Y/n being under her in her suit, made Hazel feel like one of her dreams was finally coming through. The things she kept hidden in her bedroom was finally happening. 
Y/n noticed how Hazel was far gone taking advantage off this already pissed out of her mind. Y/n wrapped her leg around Hazel’s waist taking her by surprise. She quickly took over turning them around making Hazel face the floor while Y/n straddled her. She leaned towards her, her lips grazing softly over her cheek. 
“I think I like this position better.” She said softly into Hazel's ear, making her warm inside. Hazel wasn’t going to lie and say that she didn’t like this position, but she felt powerful with the suit. She was going to be on top. Hazel with ease pushed Y/n off her straddling her once again, smiling at her. 
“I guess a little change doesn’t hurt once in a while.”  She responded by making Y/n roll her eyes. 
“Hey! Stop with the porno and hit each other already” Sylvie yelled making Hazel punch Y/n straight in the nose.
“Fuck!” Y/n yelled, holding onto her nose as blood started trailing out like a water stream. Hazel quickly got off her, her once confident persona slipping away. As  she slipped the mask off she could see how Y/n stood up coughing the blood out of her lips. 
“Shit, Hazel! We didn’t tell you to kill her” Josie exclaimed, helping Y/n up. She shakes her shrugging it off. 
“It’s okay! I’m usually the one that beats Hazel. I guess tonight was her comeback” Y/n said laughing softly as she stopped the blood flowing with a piece of Isabel shirt she had managed to rip off.  Hazel knew it wasn’t fine and that she could’ve killed Y/n if she hit her just a little bit harder.
 “I’ll take her to the bathroom. Help her clean up while you guys continue. Keep the party going” Hazel managed to get out as she took Y/n away from Josie’s grasp leading her to the bathroom. 
Y/n stayed quiet as she sat on the sink whilst Hazel nervously cleaned her probably broken nose. A smile adorned her lips when she noticed that Hazel wouldn’t dare to look at her, her Hazel was back. 
“Why are you smiling?” Hazel asked, dropping the tissues of the trash can watching the bloody mouth smiling towards her. 
“I was worried that my nervous little Hazel was gone, but I guess she’s back. Got worried for a second. ” She replied as she inspected Hazel. Hazel turned away blushing as she leaned against the door behind her, nearly falling back. 
“I’m really sorry about your nose. I didn’t mean to hit you that hard” Hazel replied quickly while gaining her balance. Y/n shook her off while getting down from the sink. 
“It’s no problem, finally you stopped being soft with me. I was starting to believe you didn’t want to hit my pretty little face” She replied sarcastically as she headed towards Hazel. Her hand pushed off the bangs from her face making her see Hazel’s features better. Y/n slowly moved closer to her but stopped dead in her tracks when both her and Hazel's phone vibrated. She quickly moved away looking at her phone while Hazel cleared her throat looking at hers, seeing the notification that Green Goblin was on the loose. 
“I really need to go! But please text me if you are feeling better! I really am sorry” She said quickly as she noticed Y/n also running towards the door. 
“Yeah, it’s no problem! I also have to go, my dad wants me to help him with work” Y/n said as she followed Hazel outside. Both of the girls looked at each other parting ways not knowing that in a few minutes they were going to face each other once again but this time to battle against death. 
part two
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fqiryspit · 2 years
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miserable.
summary: reader tries to go to a friendly get-together she was invited to, just to realize no one wants her there.
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the bright glare of the stop light blinded your vision as you finally stopped your car.
you have no one.
absolutely no friends
you grip your wheel tighter, knuckles popping at the sudden move and your eyes blurring.
you don't even know why you went. this friendly get-together was obviously interrupted by you. no one wanted you there.
you walked up to jean first, saying hi as he just kinda stood there
"hi uh-"
uh. he doesn't know your name. you feel embarrassment flood through you instantly before connie ran up and through tears of laughter started retelling a story.
connie didn't even look at you either. you sniffed awkwardly and backed up. you suppose you only talked to them on a couple of occasions, that's fine.
you felt the car stop at another light, fuck you forgot you were even driving. you now saw the pile of tears on your jeans and felt your aching throat, sobbing silently in your car like a loser.
you brushed that interaction off and went up to the people you did know, eren, mikasa, and armin of course.
you're only here because armin invited you. being his friend in this tutor group you both formed it was nice of him to invite you here, you were gonna have fun.
walking up to eren leaning against the wall casually you said hi and he just shot a quick smile before locking eyes with mikasa who walked right in front of you, stepping on your foot.
she felt your shoe immediately and spun around, you saw eren putting his hand in front of his mouth to hide his laughter and your entire body ran cold, embarrassed yet again.
"oh, I'm sorry!" mikasa said, two cups full of alcohol in her hand as she wore wide worried eyes at you. well...at least someone is talking to you
"no its-" then she spun back around and gave eren his drink, who now had a red face and a smile from laughing so hard.
you turned around, stepping away, careful with your steps, now worried to embarrass yourself further
you heard eren snicker behind you and mikasa hitting his shoulder
"shush eren! don't be so rude, I think that's connie friend..she was just trying to be nice"
they didn't even remember you. fuck you were gonna cry. you didn't have tears in your eyes yet but your throat ached so hard like you were gonna let a sob out.
there's armin, fucking finally. you walked over to him, he was pouring drinks in the kitchen and you started to feel a lot more comfortable
"hey armin"
he looked over at you for a second and looked right back to the drinks he was preparing
"oh, hey. didn't think you'd make it" he mumbled while mixing some off-brand soda with whisky and you just felt your knees buck
"well...you invited me. of course, I'd show up" you reminded him, hoping to jog his memory that he must have invited you for a reason, that maybe he wanted to be your friend
"mm." he hummed simply before grabbing the drinks and swerving past you like you were blocking his way in the wide hallway
you felt your eyes burn and just walked out the door. running to your car as tears pooled out of your eyes.
you're so embarrassed. you have no friends. zero. you joined clubs and thought you made one but he just pitied you. he couldn't even stand you that long and not to mention his friends hated you to
you're aren't some new girl trying to find which group she's good in either. you're graduating soon and you don't even have new numbers in your contacts, just family who brush you off on the rare chance they call.
you ached for someone just to talk to, just someone. anyone. you don't have to have anything in common with them, just a warm body to just air your problems out and them to respond with something more than an "mm."
you're so fucking miserable and as you park your car in this weird ass parking lot to go up into the apartment that's every shade of tan, you know you're just gonna be as alone as you always will be. because people can't fucking stand you.
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an: hope you guys have a good wednesday
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