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kinetic-elaboration · 4 years ago

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July 28: 3x01 Spock’s Brain

Today’s ep was the infamous Spock’s Brain. I’d never seen it before and always insisted I didn’t want to but...this is a complete rewatch so I guess I kinda had to.

As predicted, it was bad. Utter nonsense for a premise and the actual execution shot through with sexism. There were some aspects that I did like but most of them have been done better by other eps--and in any case were not worth the ridiculous basis of the ep itself. Honestly, if I were watching all this live, and I waited months for this, I might have wondered if the show weren’t better off cancelled.

But I would have been wrong because the next ep is The Enterprise Incident so! Sometimes you just need to be patient.

This episode is starting out so strangely. Why is the bridge being shot from all these weird angles? And why do the colors seem...duller?

They really can spy on these other ships, huh?

“My name is Captain James Kirk.” Not breaking out the middle initial today, I see.

Chapel going for the drama as she falls down.

Kirk too, sprawled over his chair. (Makes me think of “The chair is, in fact, not bolted to the ground.”)

This honestly reads like a bad parody of Star Trek.

Ridiculous lines include: “His brain is gone.” “His incredible Vulcan physique.” “In search of his brain.” “Where are you going to look for his brain?” “It was taken out, it can be put back in.”

“Spock’s body is more dependent on his brain” than a human’s. Ummmm I feel like there’s something suspicious in there.

The only good thing about this ep is Kirk’s devotion to Spock.

Seriously why does the bridge look so different? Filming it from a different location changes everything.

When Kirk paces in front of the view screen, it really shows off how small it is.

“The spaceship that has Spock’s brain.”

I like these schematics and Chekov’s little presentation here. Also Kirk can automatically put years to all the planet evolution codes or whatever--like on the one hand, of course he can, that’s his job, but on another... what a nerd.

Honestly these people--obviously, they are underground on the ice planet. Obviously!!! I actually do appreciate this scene in general, with the bridge crew working out a problem on the bridge, which actually almost never happens--it’s definitely the best scene of the ep--but still. It’s obviously the ice planet.

Also, I like that Uhura gets to contribute. She thinks outside of the box, asks the good questions. Don’t just look at the outside evolution of the planet--ask about what the brain could be used for, and where it might be.

“Get there, find the brain.”

Oh no, he accidentally called Scotty Spock :(

“High of 40. Livable.” I realize this is a Russian joke but that’s really not that bad lol. Definitely not an ice age anymore.

“They give pain and delight.” So they’re dominatrixes?

“You are small.” Well no need to be mean about it.

Don’t you have a companion?? Love that that’s one of their synonyms for “spouse” or “partner.”

The alien men look like they’re wearing short jean skirts.

“A dead and buried city on a planet in a glacial age.” That’s a good idea. Could have done something better with that.

Chekov’s still stuck on the no women thing, I think.

Why did they dress Spock in a leftover outfit from This Side of Paradise?

McCoy and his stimulants again, waking up the alien lady after they stunned her. Multi-purpose.

“I know nothing about a brain.” Clearly.

So all the women live below ground, and all the men live above...

Ah-ha, they have found Spock’s voice.

“There is a definite pleasurable experience connected with the hearing of your voice.” This ep is almost worth it for that line.

Also Kirk’s face when he hears Spock’s voice.

I like that Spock is still funny. Honestly he’s probably funnier disembodied. This is a very humorous Spock characterization. “That is a practical idea. It seems unlikely that I shall be able to get to you.”

WHAT IS BRAIN.

They’re being quite sexist, aren’t they? “No engineering geniuses here. Only women. None of these women could ever have done surgery on Spock’s brain.” Like I know it’s that they’re obviously (or supposedly obviously) naive and childlike but like combining that with the sex segregated society and the actual phrasing of these lines (WOMEN?? Engineers?? Doctors??) plus Kirk assuming the Controller is a man (who says?) all creates this like definite sexist vibe while watching. Ugh make it stop.

How can Spock’s brain control everything? They’ve only had it for 5 minutes.

“Mistress.” I told you they were dominatrixes.

Oh yeah Captain Sulu!!

More sexist quotes: “What a way to maintain control over a man.” “I’ve certainly noticed their delightful aspects.” Please stop talking; you’re digging yourselves in a deeper hole.

(Seriously though--I feel like the unspoken world building fact here is that the women need the men for procreation specifically, which is why they capture the men, and then control them--using the “pain belts”--to have sex--the “pleasure.” They probably also use them for other labor, given the presence of the male guards and the line “they won’t help us if we don’t control them” or whatever it was. But surely the delightfulness of the women is more than their physical appearance, is what I’m saying.)

What is the commentary on gender here? Women = scary, dumb, and hot?

Yeah, how DOES Spock’s brain fit into this?

Lol at Spock’s empty body calmly watching them all fighting.

“Science will triumph.” A real lost opportunity in the AOS-verse to have Kirk say this after a bar brawl.

“You are a disembodied brain.” I feel like there’s a (McCoy) joke in here about how he’s reached his ideal state.

His body is the building. (I was right, I totally called this plot point as soon as Spock started talking about his incredibly large body and how his brain was still doing things like regulating oxygen. I must say... this is not a bad idea, except for the brain stealing part. Like there’s something in there, the idea of the complex as a body, powered by a brain. Idk.)

So basically Spock is taking another opportunity to insult Bones’ medical skills. Oh Spock, never change.

I feel like Bones is enjoying his Spock puppet, on some level.

“Pain bands.”

Use the Spock puppet, Kirk! Use it to fight the lady alien!

“The controller is young and powerful, perfect.” / “How very flattering.” LOL I can’t believe this is real.

“You took his brain. You will put it back.”

So the alien lady puts on the spiky helmet and now she’s suddenly smart. I hate thissssssssssss.

(I actually do think the idea of old knowledge stored outside of the... brains...of the current generation, for their own protection, as decided by the paternalist elders... is not itself a bad concept. Of course it’s also a concept that other eps did better, like The Apple or For the World is Hollow or even Return of the Archons. Again, combining it with all the gross things they said about women earlier just leaves a bad taste. Even though--even though!!--we don’t know who the elder people were. Like, was this a matriarchal society that saved the women in the underground because they were better? Or was it a patriarchal society that put the women in the underground because they were considered weak and in need of protection? I rather assumed the second, but I think there’s some evidence for the first, in particular, that the story reeks of Sexualized Male Fear. What’s a better combination of hot and scary than a matriarchy of women in short skirts?)

“Got your gun.” (But the other way around.)

“Our need for the Controller is more important than your need for your friend.” That sounds an awful lot like “The needs of the many outweigh needs of the one” and we all know what Kirk thinks about that. That said, he’s really not...engaging with her facially fair argument at all.

“No one may kill a man. Not for any purpose. It cannot be condoned.”

Love Scotty’s acting skills. Gotta get this gun back really fast--create a diversion by fainting! But not too much!

I do love McCoy. He’s an adventurer too. He pretends he’s not but he jumps at the chance to discover and learn. He will not hesitate to put himself in danger if it’s for the common good or to protect his friends.

“Put the teacher on.”

Now finally Kirk is engaging with the fate of the society he’s encountered lol. Like, again, he’s not wrong; they’ve stagnated under the computer/controller and it’s not moral to steal from someone else to keep your comfortable and boring life going when you could just do the work yourself, but coming this late, it feels like an afterthought. It’s also weird that she just like stood by and let them take Spock and his brain after all that to do about...not letting them have the brain. Like at the end of the day she was not so inept. Also, they never explained what happens to all the knowledge in the teacher. One would assume they’d have to access it--or not? They’re just to start from scratch? Also legit I guess. And finally... all I can really hear, in the emphasis on integrating with the men again, is “You’ll learn how to develop a society naturally and also about heterosexual sex wink wink.” (Except that as I said... I think they know about that.)

I see McCoy’s regretting that “child’s play” talk now.

“Give priority to reconnecting Spock’s vocal cords.” Yep that’s how the brain works for sure.

Wow Spock really does have to do everything himself. Including operate on himself.

“This Vulcan is telling me how to operate.”

How did he operate without...opening Spock’s skull... in any way??

Not to question the verisimilitude of Spock’s Brain lol.

Everyone’s being so rude--Spock is providing valuable last minute exposition/explanation about this weird-ass society!

It’s always odd when they don’t return to the bridge. Like, they’re not going to collect Chekov?

That was... something.

I liked a few things: any excuse for Kirk to be devoted to Spock; the humor Spock showed; I liked the bridge scene where they looked at the map of the planets; and I liked certain things about the premise of the episode, although, like I said, most of the general aspects (post-disaster society, reliance on computers, etc.) had been done better in other episodes. I liked the look into the Male Brain lol.

What I didn’t like was how outright ridiculous the basic catalyzing event was--Spock’s brain has been literally stolen like??? Are you kidding me? That led to a considerable amount of dialogue that read like a Star Trek parody. Did not like that. And of course, as I said... the sexism. I think I’ve unpacked that enough. It didn’t need to be sexist, and you can explain it in a way that’s not, but the vibe sure was. It was like... well a lot of TOS is like this imo. You can give it an A (or at least a B) for effort, but what comes out is so obviously tainted by the sexism of the creators. Like, for example, how they say they believe in women who are just as capable and professional as men, but struggle to show it. This ep wanted to show a matriarchal society but it wasn’t really a matriarchal society--it was a Freudian dream that was all about the male psyche and what it most fears and wants.

All that said.. the next ep is a D.C. Fontana creation featuring one of my favorite TOS Ladies, the Female Romulan Commander, so I will be receiving a consolation prize.

Also the AOS verse is still more sexist and doesn’t have an excuse I said what I said.

#the year 2021 #2021: star trek #2021: fandom thougts #star trek tos

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theroyalmile · 4 years ago

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Started from the Bottom Now We’re... A Little Bit Above the Bottom

Note to Readers: I wrote this on Sunday morning at 5:30a.m. It captures one of the lowest moments I have felt throughout this whole experience and though I am feeling much better right now, and very much so looking forward to my surgery on Tuesday, I think it’s important, when being open about this whole thing, to capture this snapshot of emotion. I will warn you ahead of time that this is not a “fun” read. But it is honest. And I truly believe the sentiment at the end- this was very close to rock bottom for me, so I’m looking forward to the journey back up, beginning with my surgery in 5 days.

*******

A couple of weeks ago, I reached a milestone I never thought would happen. I finished chemo. This milestone felt triumphant. It felt miraculous. I had successfully leaped this giant hurdle, with more ease than I ever expected. Lucky was the word I kept using. Lucky I had never gotten sick. Lucky neuropathy had never taken hold. Lucky my lifted fingernails had never fallen off. Lucky my hair was starting to grow back. Lucky that while still terrible, chemo had been so much easier for me than I knew it was for most.

I rode this high into a wonderful celebratory night with some close friends. What was meant to be a large BBQ outside was hindered by a rainstorm, relegated to the indoors, and made much smaller, and yet, I was still deliriously happy. I held onto that delirium from one thing to the next- a laughter filled game night at my parents' new home, a lovely, relaxing few days with my partner’s family, to a productive, incredibly normal feeling day back in the office.

As I prepared to continue riding that high into my long awaited “girls weekend” with some friends who had all banded together to come in from out of town, I received a call. It was the plastic surgery department calling to confirm my surgery date for June 22- a date that was three weeks earlier than the date I had in my calendar and that I had spent the last two months making plans around. I was confused, annoyed, and a little scared. What had happened, I wondered? I contacted my social worker via email to ask her, nicely of course, what the ever-loving f*** was happening. She told me she would get to the bottom of it immediately. I did my best to enter into my girls weekend undeterred from having the most fun ever, as was planned.

The next day, I received a call from my surgeon who walked me through why the date had changed, and the pros and cons to changing the date. I won’t get into the details but the most important point is, she said it was ultimately my decision on which date to keep, but from a cancer care perspective the earlier date was optimal. This is not to say the later date would have been dangerous, just not-optimal, whatever that means. I asked if I could have the weekend to think about it and she said of course. I called my partner to discuss, and my mother. I made a little pro/con list in my phone that I would let ruminate for the weekend. And then I did my best, mostly successfully, to put this all in the back of my mind until Monday so I could enjoy my girls weekend as planned.

Ultimately, after what ended up being a wonderful, mostly cancer-thought-free weekend, with the help of my family, partner, social worker, and little pro/con list, I decided to move my surgery date up to the earlier date. After all, my number one goal here is to be cancer-free. Why would I not do everything I could to best ensure that result. Somewhat begrudgingly, but confidently, I altered all my plans. I informed work of my new surgery date which they wholeheartedly accepted and supported. I cancelled my “staycation” and other various plans I had made to enjoy my last free weekends before my procedure. I went through the process of reworking my entire brain to accept that this was all happening much, much sooner than I had planned. I found a way to become re-excited by my surgery and what it meant. No more cancer in my body. The light at the end of the tunnel was back and closer than ever.

One particularly hard pill to swallow with this closer date was that with my post-chemo energy climbing, I had been excited to start working out again, and start eating healthy again. I had hoped in those 30+ days I might even lose some of the 5 pounds or so of the chemo weight I had gained. I wanted to go into this surgery feeling powerful, strong, positive and healthy. With this newer surgery date I felt that this goal was still possible, I just had less time to accomplish it. That was fine, I thought, after all, it wasn’t about the weight loss as much as it was about feeling good. And I was determined to do my damndest to feel as good as possible with the time I had.

I started working out every day. Nothing crazy or overzealous I thought. Some brief cardio, 30-45 minutes on the stationary bike. Light weight lifts. Beginner level stuff. Enough to work up a minor sweat and push me a little. But not to push too hard. With the support of my partner I started eating well (emphasis well, not less). More salads, more fruit, more water. Less junk food. I was meditating daily, which is something I have never done before. I was feeling good, feeling empowered. I had even lost 2 pounds, which was, frankly, just a bonus.

I went into my plastic surgery pre-op appointment excited and nervous. I was going to be able to ask all of my questions about the surgery, which I had written out ahead of time. I was going to learn about how to care for my recovering body. This appointment made this all seem so real. More so than it had before. But I was happy about that. I was shocked by how excited I was by the idea of a bilateral mastectomy. Of course, still very scared, but excited, which made the fear more palatable.

I don’t like to say things that are overly flattering of myself, but I like to think through this whole process I have remained fairly calm, undeterred, and strangely positive. Not in a Pollyanna positive kind of way (as my mother would say), just optimistic about the outcome of all of this. Optimism is not my natural mode, so I have worked very hard to do this. That is not to say it hasn’t been hard. Or course it has. This has been the hardest thing I have ever done. I have cried more these last few months than probably the last few years combined. But I have remained, for the most part, positive.

This was how I felt walking into my plastics pre-op appointment. My mother was with me for support. She had been there with me for my first consult with plastics and oh boy, had I needed her. When the sheer weight of everything had hit me once we started going over breast reconstruction, I had completely lost it. She was there to support me and help lift up my voice when I could hardly speak. I had not anticipated that would be necessary this time, but she was there as a precaution, and as an extra set of ears. But it turned out I needed her more than ever. When my plastic surgeon out of the blue suggested I consider having my mastectomy without reconstruction, take a few months to recover and lose 20 or so pounds, and then come back for my reconstruction later, I lost it completely. We had already been over this two months prior. We had addressed concerns about my weight and determined the surgery as is, mastectomy and reconstruction all in one, was doable, and the right procedure for me. My weight had not changed since this conversation in March. Nothing had. So what the hell. And when I say “lost it” I mean full, heaving, sobbing, hard to breathe tears. I couldn’t think straight. I wanted to vomit. I wanted to throw something. I wanted to scream. We were two weeks out from surgery and here was this curveball that could change everything. All my questions I had pre-prepared, all of my excitement went right out the window. I remember my mother saying to the nurses, with a thinly veiled anger, “She has been very stoic through all of this, but I think today you guys broke her.”

The thing here I must make you all understand is that I am having a surgery I would never in a million years have elected to have if I did not have breast cancer and a genetic condition that gave me a 40% chance of getting breast cancer again. I am having both my breasts removed, and reconstructed with tissue from my stomach. Does the idea of that make you uncomfortable? Yeah, me too. I don’t want this. I will never wanted this. But I have accepted that this surgery is my best shot at having a normal life where I do not have to wake up every day in fear of my cancer returning. And this particular surgery, a mastectomy and reconstruction all in one, with my own tissue, while much more intense in terms of both surgical time and recovery time, is the procedure that made this “choice” that wasn’t really a choice the most palatable. I am not sugar coating to say I was excited. But when the option of doing the procedure the way I wanted was possibly being taken away from me it was all too much to handle. My mother was right. It broke me.

We left that appointment with more questions than answers. Both of us dejected, angry, bordering on more tears to accompany the ones we had already shed. After an emergency meeting with my social worker and much discussion (and more tears), and an analysis of the risks and benefits in front of me, I was done sacrificing my choices. I had already sacrificed too much to this disease and I was done. I was determined to stick with the procedure I had been planning for since March.

So did this whole event take the wind a bit out of my sails? Yes. It ruined everything just a little bit for me, and stands to make all of this a little bit harder. All the same, after making my decision, I was determined to push forward, I kept up the exercising, I had two more very productive days at the office and felt confident about my medical leave from my job. Was I feeling as strong as before? Not quite. But I was feeling better. And the weekend was approaching fast, which I was looking forward to.

I had plans for the weekend. Nothing monumental. Saturday, my partner and I had planned to go to the driving range at a local golf course. This was a favorite activity of mine when I was younger. My uncle Billy, who died in 2019, used to take me to the driving range when I was a pre-teen/teen. I was excited to give it a shot again and see if I still had it, or at least had my 14-year-old version of “it”. Saturday also happened to be the two year anniversary of my Uncle Billy’s death, which I had forgotten, but I wonder if subconsciously I remembered, as the coincidence is a bit too odd to ignore. Then Sunday, we planned to go to the beach. We were going to get there early, 8am for low tide, because one of our favorite activities is to explore tide pools. This may seem juvenile, but the beach, and the tide pools bring me immense joy. Though I only had two weekends before my surgery and a month long recovery, I was determined to make the most of them.

However, my weekend plans, like my pre-surgery excitement, were perhaps too good to be true. Saturday morning, before my day had really even started, I was bending over to put something in the compost when my back gave out and a sharp pain hit me in the center of my lower back. I was stuck there crouched down, wondering if I could even stand. With much pain I did stand, and suddenly realized I was in trouble. I called out to Caleb with a bit of urgency, and when he came over, I said “Something happened to my back, I don’t think I can walk.” And I truly didn’t think I could. He slowly walked me over to the couch where I was able to lay down, but not without excruciating pain. And when I say excruciating, I mean it. On the pain scale- the one that doctors always have with the little frowny faces I would say it was a 7. Maybe a 6. Maybe an 8. Whatever it was, I can way with utmost certainty, I have never, in my entire life, felt this much pain. Whenever I sat up- pain. Whenever I stood- pain. Whenever I took a step- pain. This was make-you-want-to-vomit pain. This was need-help-going-to-the-bathroom pain. This was I-am-afraid-to-move-even-a-little pain. I have hurt my back before. But never, ever like this.

With my upcoming surgery I am restricted from taking blood thinning medication - so no ibuprofen, no aspirin. I am also restricted from taking CBD, THC, and any marijuana products. I tried acetaminophen. I tried wet heat. I tried dry heat. I tried ice. None of it seemed to really help. We considered going to the emergency room but I wasn’t sure I could make it down our front stairs, let alone into a car. Plus the idea of one single unnecessary second in a hospital, especially with a long hospital stay looming, was unpalatable. Finally, I called Dana Farber and spoke with the on-call physician, who, after confirming it was safe for me pre-surgery, prescribed me muscle relaxers.

Of course, a driving range trip was out of the question. I cancelled dinner plans with a friend as well. I felt little to no relief until 11pm, which allowed me to make it up the stairs and into bed. The relief gave me a false sense of hope, thinking perhaps, by tomorrow, I will be better. Maybe even better enough to go to the beach. My one beach trip of the summer. That’s all I wanted. I knew tidepools were out of the question. But maybe I could at least put my feet in the sand, and smell the ocean water. That seemed good enough.

As soon as I awoke on Sunday at 5:30am to take my next dose of pain meds and muscle relaxers I knew it would never happen. I had reverted back to my earlier pain levels. I struggled to get out of bed, and required being literally held up to go to the bathroom. And I never went back to sleep after that. I just sat there, taking in everything that was happening to me at that moment. Taking stock of the ways my body felt like it was was failing me. Listing the things I had lost. Obsessing on the disappointments.

I can’t quite find the words to express how it feels to be sitting awake, propped up against your headboard like a ragdoll at 5:30 am on a Sunday, crying, but trying to be silent so as not to wake your partner, who, after tirelessly caring for you, helping you walk to the bathroom all night, has finally been able to fall asleep. Looking outside at the beautiful, cloudless blue sky, feeling the warmth of a perfect beach day seep in through the window screens, knowing I likely won’t even make it out of the house let alone to the beach.

Rage. White-hot rage is what I felt. Not at anyone or anything. I don’t even have a god to be mad at. Just life. I was mad at life. I was furious that my one weekend to enjoy, relax, and take my mind off of everything, even if just for a moment, had been taken from me, not even by cancer, but by some freak occurrence.

In this moment, sitting there, silent tears streaming down my face, chest heaving with the sheer weight of just everything I realized there was one thing I could do- my one sedentary, legless outlet. I could write.

So gingerly, I pushed myself out of bed and shuffled my way over to my work desk. With the support of the desk I lowered myself onto the floor to reach for my personal laptop. I opened it. Dead. I located the power cord under my desk, unplugged. After several painful moments of reaching, I determined I wasn’t going to be able to reach the outlet. No fear, I had a backup plan. I reached up and grabbed my work laptop. Power cord already plugged in- bingo. I opened it, made my way into Google Docs and started typing. I got five words in before a blue screen with a frowny face appeared. Well, thank goodness I used Google Docs. I rebooted and logged back in. Another sentence. Blue screen. Frowny face. I rebooted again. And again. And again. At least six or seven times of this, all while that pit of rage stuck somewhere between my throat and my belly swirled painfully. All I wanted in this one moment was an outlet- a chance to be able to write about my pain. And I was even being denied that.

As I rebooted, and rebooted, and rebooted, for the first time in a long time another word popped into my head which I had vowed to never use.

Unfair.

I hate the word unfair. And I hate it in the context of my cancer diagnosis. I was recently explaining this to a friend of mine. It’s not that I so much hate other people using the word unfair to describe what is happening to me, or to describe something happening outside of my diagnosis, but I refuse to use it for myself. I feel this way because I believe nothing about my life is unfair. Yeah, I got cancer. Yeah, I got cancer at 28. But why not me? So many people get cancer, what the hell makes me so special that it shouldn’t be me. What about the little kids I see at Dana Farber any time I’m there, running around with their little chubby bald heads. I got to be 28 before I had cancer- they didn’t. That’s unfair to them. But not to me. The word unfair scares me- because I truly believe once I begin to think that about my situation, about myself, about my current circumstances, I won’t be able to come back from that. I won’t be able to escape unfair.

Finally, as if sensing I was about to throw it against the wall, my laptop came to life and stayed that way. And I wrote all of this, starting with “unfair” and working backwards. Working through all of the things that have happened in the last two weeks to bring me to that word.

I have concluded that, still, none of this is unfair. Am I pissed off? Yeah. Exhausted? Absolutely. Angry. Sad. Scared. Humiliated. Humbled. Overwhelmed. Still in pain, as I sit here? Unfortunately, yes. But I feel oddly… better. Actually, I’m kind of smiling now as I write this and I truly have no idea why. Maybe at the absurdity of it all? Maybe because I am feeling so many things right now, why not add amused.

I’ve mentioned this before but dark humor is in my blood. It came with the DNA that gave me the BRCA1 mutation that gave me breast cancer- ironic, huh? Or full circle- I can’t tell which. I am too tired and delirious from pain and lack of sleep to know the difference. That DNA also gave me my beautiful hair- which is making it’s slow comeback. My sense of humor. My taste in music. My sense of travel and adventure. My love for words. It is half of who I am, and therefore a part of me I would never give up or change, because without it I would be someone else. And most importantly, it gave me this gift, this outlet of writing, which has somehow, in the last two hours, healed quite a lot of pain.

That seems quite fair, does it not?

I don’t know when my back pain will subside. I don’t know if it will have any effect on my surgery in a week and a half. I don’t even know if I will make it to the beach before then. But I do know that even with all of these uncertainties I feel compelled to write it down and share it with whoever feels compelled to read it. Because it's important to me that I remember what this moment feels like.

Because you know what they say about rock bottom. Nowhere to go but up, baby.

#breast cancer #cancer #mastectomy #illness #healing

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joonsmagicstudio · 4 years ago

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Meet Me Where The Waves Touches The Sky: are you ready? (IV)

Note: I put a keep reading break but I am unsure if it is working, if there is no keep reading link then please let me know! I do not wish to bother anyone with long posts.

Story Description: We all have our issues, but some of us are sub-consciously pushing it away without realizing how deep under water we are. You don't realize the things around you aren't what used to be until you meet a celebrity struggling to live. Like the hypocrite you are, you help others without helping yourself first. But no one told you about helping others gives you this exhilarating feeling of being a saint. So for how long are you going to keep being a saint in a doctor's coat?

Genre: Angst, fluff (if you squint) and smut.

Pairing: You x Namjoon

Trigger Warning: It revolves heavily around suicide, depression and death. Please don’t read it if it is a sensitive topic for you. Also keep in mind it isn’t like ‘13 reasons why’. It takes place in more of an adult setting hence mature. It also has mature (+18) scene, alcohol consumption and occasional use of foul language hehe.

I am writing about suicide, death and depression not because I romanticize it or engage in it for others to partake. It is strictly for the purpose of writing a story to convey a message beyond these three words.

Story masterlist is here: MMWTWTTS

Namjoon woke up to gentle clattering of plates and the aroma of food, with that he got up and walked over to the kitchen with an empty beer bottle in his hand. He saw you setting the plates with food on the table, only one though.

"Don't stand at the entrance Namjoon, come on in. I made breakfast for you." You set a glass of water next to his plate and stood up to face him.

"Thanks, but where is yours?" Namjoon sauntered over to the table and sat down. You took the beer away from his hand and set it next to yours at the sink.

"Oh mine? Don't worry, I already had it. You just woke up on time, I was about to go and wake you up." You smiled softly watching Namjoon stare at his plate of food for quite a while, "C'mon, eat up before it gets cold." You urged him softly, this man in front of you really is long gone to the core if he just stares and simple things, you thought, does he even have tie to sit down and eat?. You had just served him warm croissants with bacon, eggs and tea as well as water on the side along with sweet condiments to eat with the croissants.

"Alright, I have work. So I'll be leaving now. Once you are done, you can simply put the empty plates in the sink. I'll take care of it. Rest well alright, Namjoon?" You put more emphasis on his name to make sure he was looking at you and heard you clear enough.

"Yeah I will. Thanks." He mumbled before weakly lifting up the knife to scoop up the sweet condiment of his choice, strawberry jam, to slather on the croissant. With that, you left the flat with your coat and shoulder bag and headed towards your workplace.

Namjoon nibbled on his breakfast before leaving it halfway uneaten, the lack of appetite was rather overwhelming so forcing himself to eat would just be making him eat dust. Last night he had gone through the entire place but didn't see your room yet. He wanted to but that it would be an invasion of privacy, 'Just a small look won't harm anyone.' Namjoon said to himself in means of comforting himself and walked up to the door to your room. His hand rested still on the doorknob to your room, it could be locked for all he knows. But if it's locked then that means you have something to hide.

Namjoon sighed and twisted the doorknob. It opened. Your room was just like his. Devoid of many things except for a white table with a penholder that had exactly 2 pens and one pencil. Your bed was neatly made just like his was and the color scheme was exactly the same, grey and white. You had no pictures, no decorations, just nothing. There was at least a closet, with your clothes he assumed. Namjoon walked over to your closet and opened it. You had nothing but just a few dark colored bottoms and tops. Just one beige coat was hanging on the left side and that was it. No boxes or any compartments. Namjoon found it too unsettling, you really had nothing and literally nothing to hide or anything about yourself that he could learn from. If there's one thing he learned from you, then that was you had nothing about yourself.

Namjoon left your room and went back to where his breakfast laid cold, it was safe to say that he was unsettled by the lack of your 'things' but then you were helping him a great deal. He decided to just ask about it when you came back, which would be late night since you stayed late working last night.

〰️ 💠 〰️

"This artificial intelligence will produce a realistic hologram of the person's most loved or dear one- The hologram then would speak to the person and talk them down. If this proves succesfu-"

"How would the hologram even find the person's loved one Y/LN?" The one and only researching professor on depression and suicide at the moment in the hospital, Dr. Richards, blatantly asked. He never really liked you. Why? It's simple really, you were younger and better than him and he had bruised ego because of that. It didn't bother you that much really because the more he tried to attack you, the more openings he made that allowed you to defeat him.

"The AI can easily run a facial recognition on a person's face and I'm sure you have studied a bit on the brain, right?"

"Yes-"

"Then you would know that a particular region of the brain, called Hippocampus, shows a spike in activity when the person is remembering something. You see, this is where the AI comes into play, not only does it do facial recognition but because its sensor is so powerful, it can pick up the readings of the person Hippocampus and dive into its memories and picks out the most memorable memory. And from that memory it does a background check on the person involved in it to see if the bond between that person is strong or has fallen away before producing a holographic image of it." You stopped right in front of Dr. Richards defiantly, crossing your elbows you asked, "Anymore questions?"

"What about the voic-"

"Oh doctor, hasn't someone told you memories are extremely powerful. The AI can pick up the voice from the memory too." You shot back at him.

"What if the memorable person is dead huh?! What would the AI do? Show it? That gives a push to the person to fucking suicide." Dr. Richards slammed both of his hands on the table, the glass of water next to him rattled and splashed violently, other doctors in the room zeroed on you. You had to admit that this time he got you. You hadn't thought about that. It was a flaw, a major flaw. If the person saw his loved one that is dead, that person would most likely go for it to see them.

Silence hung heavy in the air, all the doctors were looking at you for some kind of answer. If you didn't answer then all the hard work, effort and attempts you put into this would go down the drain.

So theoretically someone who saw his dead loved one would take a leap to be with them unless- "In case of that unfortunate event, the AI would ensure the hologram of the loved one talks them down, it talks the person out of suicide. It would reject each time the person says I want to be with you. The AI would tell them no. Look, it's difficult to explain but you get my gist. It doesn't matter who appears as a hologram as long it can talk the person out of suicide. I mean think about it, South Korea has the highest rate of suicide, with this invention we can reduce the number greatly and we won't be infamous for being number one in that category. Think about how much benefit it could bring us." You walked back to the center of the stage and stood in front of the projection that displayed your prototype model of the AI device, "That's all. I hope you can consider this idea." You were pushed into the corner so you had to end the presentation there on a dull note.

〰️ 💠 〰️

You walked out of the conference room with much more weight on your back than when you first entered. You had noticed that when you ended your presentation, all the doctors and the delegates were pondering over it, there was no face of confirmation or anyone that seemed to be willingly to go for this idea of yours.

"Hey! Y/N!" Someone called behind you and you turned around to locate the owner of the voice.

"Wooyoung, is there something?" You asked with your eyebrows raised at him. He was jogging frantically in his white lab coat and stethoscope flapping around wildly.

"Didn't you hear over the comms?" Wooyoung came to a halt in front of you, he panted heavily with his hand on his thighs for a moment before standing up.

"I was in the conference-"

"Fuck-okay, it's code blue Y/N! It's yours." Wooyoung grabbed your arm and pulled you violently towards the west wing. If he said code blue, then it required immediate attention. The hospital had set up a system in which they could use code words to alert all doctors and staff of a particular situation without causing a stir or panic in the patients. Code blue means this person requires immediate attention within a few minutes. If it occurred in the west wing then it was either a person from the general surgery ward or the psychiatric ward. You really hoped it wasn't the latter, because that would most likely mean that someone managed to get out of their room and was about to stir up trouble. But if there's one thing you have learned in your life, that one thing is that hoping is futile. You knew it was definitely someone from the psychiatric ward because Wooyoung said it was yours.

Wooyoung and you stopped when you both reached the open space of the West Wing where you could see floors and floors accessible by stairs and escalator. Wooyoung then tapped your shoulder and pointed up to the 7th floor. The west wing was several stories tall, after all it was a major hospital.

"Fuck." Was the only thing that slipped out of your mouth when you saw the situation that Wooyoung pointed to.

"Yeah fuck." Wooyoung muttered, "We can't get her to come down, she is hell-bent on jumping. The ledge she's standing on is awfully thin, we can't risk catching her because it'll just take her one step." Wooyoung relayed to you the situation that was unfolding in front of your eyes. That girl was your patient, Kim Jungha, that's her name. You had her put in for treatment for severe depression topped with schizophrenia, it was a nasty combination.

"Right, where is her family? They could help. There's no way we could catch her from the bottom." You asked. Kim Jungha's family was the closest thing to happiness she had before she landed her, especially her sister. That's what you had understood after many sessions with Kim Jungha and right now she could use her sister.

"I'll go and talk to her, hopefully buy enough time till her family arrives." You exhaled sharply and jogged towards the staircase that led to the 7th floor where Jungha was dangerously standing on the ledge.

As you approached 7th floor, you saw the entire floor swarmed with the staff and few doctors surrounding Jungha at a considerable distance, it was silent and tension was high except for a faint conversation between Jungha on the ledge and another staff member, by the look of Jungha's dull and hopeless expression, you understood that the conversation wasn't going well. You squeezed yourself through the surrounding staff and came to stand in front of Jungha. Jungha's back was facing the vast space with a solid drop, which meant one step and it was near impossible to get her back. You glanced behind her briefly before signalling with your hand for the other staff who was talking to keep quiet and back off.

"Jungha, can we talk?" You softened your voice, you didn't want to show her any signs of stress that you were under. Jungha stayed silent, you took that as a sign to keep talking.

"I understand what you are feel-"

"Please cut that bullshit. You don't, how would you? You are trained to say bullshit like to make us feel better. Guess what? It doesn't fucking work." Jungha spat harshly in your face.

She is a tricky one, you've always felt people like Jungha was like talking to a wall, "Alright, you think I don't understand. That's fine by me. What about your sister? How do you think she would feel if you left her alone?" You decided to pull the sister card. One of the most important thing learned about talking to people to of suicide was if you can't sympathize with them, then redirect their anguish and focus to the loved ones that could make them rethink their choices.

Jungha didn't reply, which means that she's doubting now.

"Your sister would be heartbroken to find out that you left her. She wouldn't be happy without you because you mean so much to her, you mean the universe to her."

"But my sister, my mother, they would be better off without me wouldn't they? I am nothing but a burden to them, Y/N." She said solemnly as she used your name. You always let your patients call you by your first name simply because it would be comfortable for them to talk to you.

"You aren't a burden Jungha. You are just like us. We have all got a backpack, some are just heavier than others but at the end of the day we all keep continuing with our backpacks in the journey. And the reason we keep going on is because there are others in the journey. Others that keep us company and make the journey bearable and before we even realize it, we forget about the heavy backpacks and keep on continuing the journey. For you, that person who makes your journey bearable is your sister and you are the same for here. If you leave her, her journey would be difficult for her." You took a step closer as you spoke so just in case, just in case she decides to.

You also prepared yourself for another technique to get a person off the ledge. But that technique wouldn't change the person's mind, rather it could turn violent. That technique was to say you wanted their wallet or something so when the person would hand it over, you could grab their hands and pull them to safety. The only problem was that there were a lot of things that could go wrong with it. And she doesn't have anything on her that you could ask for.

"You know, Y/N. I've always admired you." Jungha suddenly said, steering the entire focus of the conversation off the tracks. Murmurs arose behind you from the staff and suddenly you weren't able to think properly. Why this now?

"Shut up." You whipped around to silence the staff before turning back to Jungha, "Why? Why have you admired me?" You were baffled at her statement about you.

"You have it perfect. Perfectly fine mind, healthy body, wonderful job. You have it all Y/N." Jungha sighed, her shoulders slumping and she hung her head low, staring at the ground. She calmed down a bit.

Only if she knew.

"Jungha, no one is perfect-"

"Is it gonna rain today?" Jungha suddenly looked up face to face with you.

She loved rain, almost everyday she would press her face against the window during the sessions with you and ask if it would rain or not. Since then you learned that if it did rain, she would simply ask if she could go out for a stroll and bask in the wet shower, just to enjoy the feeling of rain pouring down on her. You knew why she liked rain, you also like rain, in fact the two of you liked rain for one particular reason.

No one could see if you were crying.

But it wasn't raining outside right now, 'Shit.' you thought as warning bells went off in your head and cold sweat washed over you before you sprinted the last few steps to catch her as Jungha leaned back, taking a step backward.

And once again, you were too late. 〰️ 💠 〰️

"Time of death, 12:52 PM."

The ground floor of the west wing had been cordoned off and staff was cleaning up the floor. A body had been placed on a gurney and covered in a white cloth before being transported to the mortuary. Someone was busy wiping the blood off like it was a normal thing while the other one was disinfecting it completely.

You were nowhere to be seen on the premise.

The family of Jungha came a little too late. But not late enough to see a body hurtling to the ground with an audible crack and blood pooling out. It would have been better if they came later or never came at all, after all it was never a beautiful sight to see.

Before you disappeared, you did pay your respect to the family of the deceased as part of doctor's duty. It was nothing short of disappointment and anger from them. The mother slapped you with tears streaming down her face, yelling at you about how shitty and inconsiderate you were. You didn't fight back or shed any tears. You kept quiet and took it in, no one can never do anything against a mother in deep anguish over the loss of their child. No parent would wish to carry their children coffin before they passed away. That wasn't something you could change.

You had left the hospital earlier than your shift, it didn't matter if you left early. You were already past the quota of shifts that you needed to complete this month. All you wanted right now was to lay in the bed of the flat. Just some time alone to do your work would be great. Just like how you did with the rest of your days, a death in the routine didn't faze you in the slightest.

Namjoon heard the beeping sound of the passcodes being punched into, 'Why is she back so early?' he thought as he glanced at the time in the upper right corner of the PC in his room. In the time you were gone, he had decided to look up on you to see if he could find anything but alas there was nothing on you and he ended up getting side-tracked to reading through fan comments about him and his work. He stood up, pushing the chair behind him and walked to the entrance and greeted you.

"Hey." It was simple, short and curt.

You looked up from your shoes, ah, you had almost forgotten about him at the flat. "Oh, hey. You good?" You asked, striking a small conversation.

"Oh yeah I am good. Hey-uh thanks for letting me use your flat. I really appreciate it." Namjoon shyly thanked you with a soft smile.

"Anytime." You replied, "One condition though."

"Name it!" Namjoon chuckled, "One condition is nothing compared to what you have done for me."

"Never. Never bring work here. When you enter this flat. You leave work outside. That means absolutely anything from reading or writing or even thinking about it if possible." You sternly said with your eyes fixated on his face. You left no space for negotiations.

Namjoon opened his mouth to say something but your gaze shut him down. He was looking through comments a while back. That meant he couldn't do it anymore now, "I'll try." he hesitantly complied, he would definitely try, but if ideas and inspirations hit him while he was here then he would somehow have to make a mental note or at least jot it down before it's gone.

"Good. I'm going to work for a little bit. Feel free to do whatever you want." With that you walked towards the room in which you were going to work in bed.

'That's it?' Namjoon thought as he saw your figure close the door to the room. You really were someone he couldn't read at all. Yesterday, you seemed to be doing everything on impulse and on a whim but today you seemed distant. He had no clue about who you are other than your name, occupation and where you lived. Honestly, he found it intriguing. He wanted to know more of who you are and what kind of person you are. It would be awkward to just go to you and say 'Hey I want to know you a bit more. Can we chat?' like right now. 'Whatever, just go for it', Namjoon thought and with that he walked to where you went and pushed the door slightly and looked in with his head before fully stepping inside. He saw you sitting in the bed with the laptop and blanket over your legs. You had your headphones, presumably listening to music.

You felt a presence enter the room and you turned your head to find Namjoon standing, 'What can I help you with?" You asked as you closed your laptop and slipped your headphones off to listen to him.

"Ah, I just wanted to talk to you if you don't mind."

"About what?" You raised your eyebrows at him and patted on a spot across you on the bed for him to sit. Namjoon accepted the gesture and sat on the edge of the bed with one leg folded and the other resting against the side of the bed with the foot barely touching the floor.

"Oh um about anything really, I just want to want to get to know you a bit better since you know I'll probably be frequenting this place of yours." Namjoon looked down at your bedsheet and traced a circle over and over again with his index finger.

"Well, what do you want to know about me then?" You weren't really up for the idea of talking to him about you but he had a fair point. He was going to frequent this place and it wouldn't be ideal if he didn't know you but stayed anyways.

"Well for starters, what were you listening to?" Namjoon looked up to you.

"Music."

"Oh cool, I listen to music too. What kind of music?"

"Pop."

Few seconds passed by in the awkward atmosphere between the 2 of you.

"Okay um-nevermind this conversation. I'll be off to my room." Namjoon exhaled in slight disappointment at your lack of answers. Even talking to you was tough, he felt like he was pretty much talking to nothing.

"Okay no wait. Sorry I'm not much of a person to talk about myself." You felt shame in your actions flood your brain, " I'll admit I'm being a bit rude here. Uh the song I was listening to right now was she's in the rain by the rose. Uhm-listen to it. It's pretty good I guess." You leaned forward, hurriedly put your hand on his hand to stop him from going and then retracted your hand slowly once realizing the skin contact you had made. Small but it burned strongly at the fingertips. You didn't realize it then but the fact that the touch burned strongly was probably because you had deprived yourself of skin-ship for so long that you didn't remember how it felt anymore.

Namjoon halted and looked up to you, it soon dawned on him that you aren't much of a skin-ship person looking at how you retracted moments after barely touching him. He let out a small smile, he learned 2 things today. You like a song 'she's in the rain' by the rose and you aren't the type for skin-ships.

"Nah it's quite alright. I just wanted to know a bit about you since, you know I might be crashing this place frequently and it seems kind of weird that I don't know you at all." Namjoon slowly sat down again on the edge of the bed.

"Yeah, no that's absolutely right, you deserve to know a little about the host of the place." You murmured, keeping your eyes trained to the bed sheet surrounding your hands. A small silence followed after your reply and Namjoon took it as an end of the conversation. He slapped both of his palms flat against his thigh, "Right, well I better get going on with my stuff and let you do your own thing." Namjoon exhaled, he felt like he had in a way overstayed his stay near you. To be honest, he felt pretty awkward around you since it was out of your workspace and mostly because you felt 'difficult' or 'hard' to interact, there wasn't a click of a human connection, yet. For nth time he thought again if it was really a good idea to crash at your place when he felt it was too much and overbearing

"Ah, okay. Just remember, anytime you are welcome here Namjoon." You gave him a short and curt smile. Had anyone not been paying attention, they would have missed it. It was a tight-lipped smile but Namjoon appreciated it. Nevermind, he was gonna stay for a few hours more before leaving. 〰️ 💠 〰️

"Hyung. Where were you?" Jungkook's head perked up the moment he heard the footsteps of Namjoon entering the dorm. "You were gone for a few days, we got worried."

"Ah, I stayed at a friends house. Sorry for not informing." Namjoon replied as he rested the very blue painting he had been admiring in your place against the wall to shrug off his coat.

"Is that so?- To be honest it's getting concerning" Jungkook set down his bowl of snacks on the table that was once sitting on his lap on the couch. He twisted a little bit to the right to face the entrance and propped his arm on top of the couch backrest. He didn't miss the blue painting that was leaning against the wall, he had expected Taehyung to be the kind of person to bring artworks but not Namjoon though, maybe a bonsai tree or books being brought home would be normal.

"What's concerning?" Namjoon looked at him curiously, however he couldn't help but feel like he was going to get caught or that he had something to hide.

"You aren't what you used to be. Like when fans would come to you, you would be happy to take selfies with them but now you run away from them. It's kind of all over on news by the way, you running away from your fans. Now the media is calling you disrespectful." Jungkook looked up at him with his doe eyes. It felt like he was piercing through Namjoon to see what was Namjoon hiding, "But hyung, I've known you for a long time. Sure, running off wasn't quite nice but it's more than just running away from them because you don't want to see them. Am I right?" he hesitantly asked, hoping that Namjoon would clarify his thoughts that it was definitely more than just running away.

"Jungkook-ah it's fine. I will apologize anyways. I didn't want to see them really." Namjoon swallowed harshly and ended the conversation there, not allowing Jungkook to add in any further.

"Alright, if you say so Hyung." Jungkook wasn't fully convinced by what Namjoon said but decided to drop it to avoid pissing him off. A pissed off leader was the last thing the members in the dorm needed on their much awaited week off from their schedule.

Namjoon dragged himself to his room along with the painting and closed the door with an audible bang. Jungkook made a mental note to himself to tell other members that Namjoon is easily agitated nowadays.

Namjoon found himself staring at the sheet of paper in front of him, the blue painting had now been propped up against the wall opposite to his bed so that it would be the first thing she saw when he woke up and last thing to see before he went to sleep. He had everything he needed, a paper, a pencil, eraser and all sorts of things necessary to get going on with writing lyrics. What he was missing was his brain, well it was empty of thoughts and ideas. He was missing some kind of inspiration to write and all that was coming out of his head was lacklustre sentences. With a deep sigh he leaned back into his chair and hung his head backward as he looked at the plain white ceiling of his studio room. White and clean just like your office in the hospital.

Even though this wasn't relevant to the task he had forced himself to do, which was writing some lyrics, all that was coming to his mind at this moment was you. Your demeanor and words added to a confusing enigmatic character of you. He had never come across anyone extremely closed off- yet yearns to allow others to expose themselves to you. He figured you had some sort of trust issues, it would make sense if you did, only trusting others to spill information and so you wouldn't let on a single bit about yourself.

Who are you as a person? Do you have friends? Family? Someone special?

You on the other hand, were in your room and you still kept typing away on your laptop. You made sure to keep yourself busy at all times because you didn't want to think that you were alone and the whole place was quiet. You didn't want to be left alone to your own thoughts.

If there was one thing you hated the most, it was silence. Silence turned into a place for people to be vulnerable and face-to-face with their own thoughts, ideas and their own judgement that they promised would never come to see the light of the day.

Silence drove you nuts, because from silence it would transition into playful noises and laughters that could be heard though-out the house that was supposed to be long gone. Sometimes just the sound of someone entering home from a long day outside would get you eagerly excited like a dog waiting for its owner's arrival.

"Y/N! Get your ass down here!" A husky voice suddenly called from downstairs, it was your older brother, he had dropped out of University recently and started taking up jobs such as a barista and many other mundane jobs a high-school degree could get.

"Coming Seonghwa!" You hopped off your bed and hurriedly jogged downstairs to greet your brother by the doorsteps. Wooden floorboards creaking and groaning under your weight, the house and the flooring was old, probably in need of renovation soon but you didn't care. It was all your brothers could get with their earning and the leftover money from your late parents and you were more than happy with that.

"Are you ready? Shall we head to the hospital?" He ruffled your hair a little bit before flashing you his warm smile, his hair was slightly messy from the cap he wore at his workplace, there were bags underneath his eyes from constantly working overtime to scrape up as many cents he could.

"Yes, I am ready, let's get going." You slipped on your worn out converse shoes, it was loose and comfortable from all the years of constant rough wearing. An old ratty shoe that was due for a new one but you couldn't find it in your heart to get rid of it. It was a gift from your brothers years ago that you had cherished it even though it was originally a few sizes too big.

The two of you were heading to the hospital to meet your middle brother, Seonghwa was the oldest while you were the youngest and Hongjoong was the middle one. Your parents had long passed away or that is what you had been told by your brothers, so that is why Seonghwa had to drop out of University to start being the bread-winner of the family when the price of education was getting ludicrously high. It was originally Hongjoong who had dropped out to start working since he just finished high school and you were still doing your 11th grade while Seonghwa was halfway through 1st term. But things started to get worse, your middle brother had gradually started growing sicker each passing day and one fine day you found him collapsed in the kitchen, completely pale and depleted of energy.

After admitting Hongjoong to hospital, Seonghwa and you learned that he had brain cancer that had been ebbing his energy away and emotional stability bit by bit. After a long and lengthy talk session in the room your brother was admitted, the two of them decided that Seonghwa will drop out of university to fund the medical bills and let you continue your education. You hated the idea, but you didn't put up much of a fight. It was the most logical thing to do and you wanted to get into a medical school, earn well and save Hongjoong, that is if he keeps holding on till then.

Ever since then, the house grew emptier, only you were the one that stayed in the house, majority of the night the house was empty and the hospital room was filled with soft snores of the three of you sleeping together mixing with the faint beeping sound of the medical equipment. Hongjoong on the bed, you on the couch and Seonghwa on the makeshift bed right next to Hongjoong. Despite the rough times, you found comfort and solace in the presence of both your brothers, but that didn't stop you from feeling anxious every fleeting day about how Hongjoong was doing, about how Seonghwa was holding up. You could only see Hongjoong looking paler and paler despite him smiling. You could only see Seonghwa coming home more tired, more dull than the previous day yet he never failed to smile and keep you happy and give you company.

It was going great, really great, you had hopes that your brother would recover from brain cancer, your older brother would eventually be able to get back to studying university and everything would be back to normal.

That's what you thought, of course it's never that easy, never that good, life doesn't give it to you that easy.

It started declining steeply to a shitty end of a chapter, and it started with your elder brother first.

Suddenly a pinging sound resonated from your laptop and you were pulled back to reality harshly, you were still sitting on the bed, the only difference was that you slipped up and let yourself succumb to the silence. The music in the headphones had stopped playing a while back because it had reached the end of the playlist, so with a painful sigh and clenched up throat you pulled off your headphones and gingerly closed your laptop. The warmth of the memory slowly faded and cold air seeped through your skin. Your head felt heavy yet empty and a familiar negative feeling seemed to enclose around your head and your line of bright vision to a duller light.

You didn't feel like sleeping tonight, maybe another shift at the hospital wouldn't hurt. This was your coping mechanism, running away and busying yourself in work that gave you no space in your mind to think about anything else.

#kpop #kpop imagines #namjoon fic #namjoon x reader #bts #bts imagines #ateez fanfic #ateez x reader #ateez hongjoong #ateez seonghwa #kpop angst #kpop fluff

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yogaadvise · 6 years ago

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5 Seated Yoga Poses for Migraine Prevention and Relief

Migraines are migraines in the same method that a broken bone is an aching arm or leg. Absolutely nothing can compare to the discomfort and also suffering brought on by migraine headaches, which are experienced by 37 million people in the UNITED STATE alone.

Migraines have multiple triggers or causes as well as treatment consists of whatever from medicine to surgery. If you experience migraines as well as desire a medication-free approach of relief, yoga may give it.

What Are Migraines?

A migraine headache is classified as a neurological condition that causes reoccuring frustrations that can be modest to high in strength. Commonly, just one side of the head is impacted, as well as the headache can last for 2 hours to two days.

- It is frequently come with by severe level of sensitivity to seem or light.

- A sufferer may feel nauseous or vomit.

- Physical task can worsen the pain.

- Various sufferers have various triggers that start a migraine.

There is no solitary reason of migraines, and also anyone can get them, however persistent patients usually miss out on work or special occasions because of the discomfort. There are numerous kinds of therapy including medicine, surgical procedure, stress reduction, as well as cause avoidance.

Yoga is a type of exercise that has been found to alleviate, and even prevent migraines in some individuals. It can ease discomfort by improving blood flow to the body and also brain, raise your oxygen degrees, and also eliminate stress.

Beyond migraine alleviation, yoga has numerous other health and wellness benefits as well.

5 Seated Yoga Presents for Migraine Headache Prevention and Relief

Beginning to find out yoga from a seated position can help if you are experiencing lightheadedness or queasiness. It likewise has the advantage of hing on an extra padded part of your body as opposed to rest your weight on your knees.

Breathing

The first point you find out to do in a yoga exercise course is just how to breathe effectively. A certain method and timing of breathing, referred to as Pranayama, is a critical component of the method of yoga.

Beginners find out Ujjayi Pranayama or Conqueror's Breath.

- Inhale through the nose.

- Exhale slowly with the mouth.

- Direct the exhale along the rear of the throat with a long HA sound.

- Repeat a number of times after that close the mouth.

- Inhale as well as exhale with the nose, remaining to gradually direct the air along the back of the throat, producing a soft hissing sound.

Creating the audio aids you keep your breathing slow-moving and also maintain emphasis on your technique.

From a Sitting Position

Padmasana is also recognized as the Lotus position, the position most connected with yoga exercise. It can also be challenging to find out. Each leg, subsequently, is led into the position such that all-time lows of the feet are facing upwards and resting on top of the opposite thigh.

Do not attempt to force this position. If it confirms difficult, sitting on the floor covering with your legs crossed as well as your back straight is likewise effective.

Padmasana is an outstanding posture to exercise pranayama.

Paschima Namaskarasana is likewise called the Reverse Prayer. It opens up the upper body and also abdominal area to enable much deeper breathing. The shoulders, neck, and also top back have more area, boosting blood circulation.

Seat yourself in a comfy position, and also bring your palms behind your body, working to join at the center with fingertips dealing with downward. During your inhale, transform the fingertips up as if in prayer. Try to press the side of your hands right into your spine and press the palms with each other. It's ALRIGHT if they don't meet.

Breathe 10 times in this pose.

Janu Sirsasana, the Head-to-Knee present, extends the back and the legs while opening the hips. It is done by putting both legs directly in front.

- Bend one leg inward with the knee positioned to the outside.

- Location the sole of the foot on the within the opposite upper leg as near the groin as possible.

- Raise the arms and breast straight up to the sky while inhaling, then exhale and bend the top body and arms forward over the leg as well as attempt to touch the toes of the extended leg.

- Relax and also switch to the various other leg.

Paschimottanasana, the seated, two-legged ahead bend is comparable to Janu Sirsasana over except both legs continue to be straight in front, stretching the back and legs.

- Flex your toes towards you with the large toes touching as well as the heels slightly apart.

- Lift the back and press your sitting bones into the earth.

- Inhale while raising your top body as well as arms into the sky, then breathe out as you bend onward over your legs to reach towards the toes.

- Put your chin to your breast as well as lengthen the rear of your neck. Your shoulders ought to move past your ears.

- Relax your throat and breathe.

Shavasana, or Remains Posture, is often used at the end of a yoga exercise session as a method to proceed concentrating on breathing while enabling the muscle mass to relax.

Start by pushing your back with your feet and also legs close together. Enable your feet to fall to the sides. Position your arms at a 30-degree angle from your body with the hands encountering up. Close your eyes and also concentrate on relaxing your entire body as well as relaxing on the earth.

Tips for Getting Started

First of all, never pressure to accomplish a present or stress over the perfection of kind. An experienced yoga exercise teacher can assist you find out the different poses and also breathing strategies safely.

There more than 20 various types of yoga exercise. You may need to attempt greater than one to find the type easiest or most enjoyable for you. Check your regional gym or online to discover classes to obtain you started properly.

Along with yoga, focus to nutrition and also hydration can aid you prevent migraine headaches. Considering that some triggers are food related, seeing what you eat as well as staying clear of particular foods will certainly assist lower the likelihood of developing a migraine.

Do not feel you need to do all of these postures. Discover them as well as created a set of movements that appears one of the most advantageous for your body and mind.

Yoga is a mild exercise that can assist stop migraine headaches or eliminate migraine pain by helping you relax your joints and muscles while boosting your oxygen degrees as well as blood circulation.

#pilates #pranayama #types of yoga #yoga #yoga poses

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thepyramidgirl · 6 years ago

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THE MEANING OF OUR DREAMS

Abdomen

To see your abdomen in a dream refers to your natural instincts and repressed emotions. There is something in your real life that you "cannot stomach" or have difficulties accepting. You need to get it out of your system. Alternatively, the abdomen may be strictly physiological and you may just be experiencing constipation or indigestion.

To dream that you abdomen is exposed, signifies trust and vulnerability. You may be expressing a desire to express your primal emotions/instincts.

To dream that your abdomen is swollen, indicates that some new project is in the works.

Ankle

To dream about your ankles indicates that you are seeking support and direction in your life. Ask yourself where you want to be headed.

To sprain your ankle in your dream suggests that you are experiencing some obstacles or difficulties in your progress.

To dream that your ankles are swollen indicates that you are headed down the wrong path. Alternatively, the dream is telling you to get off your feet and relax. You are pushing yourself too hard.

Anus

To see your anus in your dream signifies negative emotions that you may be holding in and repressing. It represents feelings of guilt, shame, and self-worth. Alternatively, the anus is associated with either your generosity or stinginess. Consider also you or someone in your life who may be anal retentive and perhaps need to loosen up a bit.

Arm

To see your arms as the emphasis in your dream indicates your nurturance side and your ability to reach out and care for people. Alternatively, it may represent the struggles and challenges in your life. Consider the phrase of "arming yourself" which implies that you need to protect yourself, be more aggressive and take a firmer stance on things or the pun "up in arms", representing anger and your readiness to argue.

To dream that your arm has been injured, signifies your inability to care for yourself or your helplessness in reaching out to others. You may have been feeling limited and restricted in terms of your freedom or activities. The right arm signifies your outgoing nature and is associated with masculine energy, while your left arm signifies your supportive or nurturing nature and is associated with feminine qualities. Losing either arm may suggest that you are failing to recognize its respective characteristics.

To dream that you rip someone else's arms out, indicates that you are extremely upset with something that this person has done, but you have not been able to fully express your anger. Because you tend to keep your emotions inside, it is finding expression in your dreams in a violent way.

Dreaming that someone has more than two arms symbolizes acceptance, receptiveness or being open minded.

Armpit

To see/notice your or someone else's armpit in your dream represents your social connections and your relationships to others. It is the characteristics and personality that you chose to display to the public. Alternatively, the dream may refer to something or some place that is smelly.

To smell your armpit in your dream indicates that you are making some character adjustments in order to smooth over a situation or relationship. Alternatively, it suggests that you are looking for acceptance.

Back

To dream of your back, represents your attitudes, strengths, burdens and stance in the world. It may also relate to stress and pressure that someone is putting on you.

To see a naked back in your dream symbolizes secrets that you may have kept from others or aspects of yourself that you have kept hidden and shielded away. Consider the phrase, "watch your back!"; this dream may be telling you to do just that. Traditionally, seeing a back in your dream, forewarns that you should not lend money to anyone. In particular, lending money to friends will cause a rift in your relationship.

To see a person turn their back on you, signifies that you will be deeply hurt as a result of envy and jealousy.

If you suffer from back pain, then you may have dreams of breaking your back or throwing your back out. Your dreams incorporate things from your waking life, even physical pain.

Blood

To dream that you are bleeding or losing blood, signifies that you are suffering from exhaustion or that you are feeling emotionally drained. It may also denote bitter confrontations between you and your friends. Your past actions has come back to haunt you. Women often dream of blood or of someone bleeding shortly before or during their periods and when they are pregnant.

To dream that you are drinking blood, indicates that you have a fresh burst of vitality and power.

Body

To dream about your own body signifies your level of self-worth and self-esteem. Often times, these qualities are dependent on your physical appearance or how your perceive yourself. The dream body also reflects your conscious identity. The body is also representative of your state of health.

Bones

To see bones in your dream suggests the discovery of your personal, family, or cultural secrets. It is also symbolic of your underlying strengths that you have not yet recognized. Consider the symbolism of getting to the "bare bones" or the significance of "having a bone to pick with someone."

To dream of broken bones signifies that you have discovered or realized that there is a weakness in your plans or in your thinking. Your dream may call for you immediate attention to a particular situation or relationship.

Brain

To dream of your brain, suggests that you are under severe intellectual stress. You need to put your problem-solving abilities to use. Alternatively, it implies that your ideas are not receiving enough attention and validation. You are concerned that your knowledge and teachings are not be transmitted clearly.

To dream that you are undergoing brain surgery, indicates that you need to rethink some important issue. You need to change your way of thinking and put aside any misconceived notions you have.

Breasts

To see breasts in your dream symbolizes primal nourishment and your need to be nursed and care for. The breasts represent motherhood, nurturance, and infantile dependency. Alternatively, breasts represents sexual arousal and raw energy.

Seeing naked breasts can also denote a feeling of exposure and invasion of privacy. In particular, for a woman, the dream may indicate anxieties about becoming a woman/mother.

Buttocks

To see your buttocks in your dream represent your instincts and urges. The dream also indicates your feelings of insecurity and reveals your struggles with some situation.

To dream that your buttocks are misshaped suggest undeveloped or wounded aspects of your psyche.

To dream that someone is smelling or kissing your butt indicates that someone in your life is not being genuine about her or his intentions.

Calves

To see your calves in your dream symbolize movement and your ability to jump from situation to situation. In particular, if you are admiring your own calves, then it denotes a needy or codependent relationship.

Cheeks

To see your cheeks in your dream symbolizes commitment, intimacy, and closeness. It also reveals your strength of character and your opinions. Alternatively, cheeks can also be a slang for the buttocks.

To see rosy-colored cheeks in your dream signifies life energy, enthusiasm and vitality. If the cheeks are sunken in, then it symbolizes sadness, hunger, poverty and/or struggles. The emphasis of cheeks in your dream could also point to health issues.

To dream that your checks are painted, represents your attitudes of courage and violence/passivity.

Chest

To see your chest in your dream signifies confidence, conquest and vitality. Alternatively, it represents feelings of being overwhelmed and being dangerously confronted by something. Consider also if the dream is telling you that there is something that you need to "get off your chest".

To dream that you are beating on your chest, indicates triumph and a great accomplishment.

It is common for those who experience real life chest pains to have dreams where they are being shot in the chest or feel heavy pressure on their chest.

Ears

To see ears in your dreams, suggest that you need to be more responsive or receptive to guidance and assistance from others. You may be relying too much on your own judgment and intuition. You need to listen more closely to what you are being told. Alternatively, it signifies your immaturity and lack of experience. If you dream that your ears are weird or oddly shaped, then it indicates deception.

To dream that you are cleaning wax from your ears, suggests that you are not listening to those around you. There may be something that you are refusing to hear. Are you turning a deaf ear?

To dream of pain in your ear, indicates that you will be receive some bad or offensive news.

To dream that your ear has been severed or cut off implies that you are tired of hearing what others tell you. If someone else's ear has been cut off, then it suggests that you should keep your opinions to yourself. Or that you need to stop talking about others.

To dream that your ear is being pulled, indicates dissent and disagreements. If you are pulling someone else's ear, then it suggest that you have a tendency to force your opinions on others.

To dream that your ears are getting red, symbolizes shame or guilt.

To dream that someone is whispering in your ear, suggests that you need to pay closer attention to something or listen to someone more carefully. Alternatively, it represents your insecurities and anxieties that people are talking about your behind your back.

Dreaming that there are bugs coming out of your ear suggests that you have overheard something that you shouldn't have. Alternatively, bugs in your ear represent rumours.

Elbows

To see your own elbow in your dream indicates that you need to make a space for yourself. Your dream may express hesitance or fear in creating your own space for fear of being scrutinized. Alternatively, the dream may be a pun on your need to put more "elbow grease" on some task.

To dream that your elbow is wounded, suggests your inability to function in some waking situation. It may also refer to some sexual anxiety. The right elbow relates to moral and ethical issues while the left elbow represents passiveness and your undeveloped characteristics.

Entrails

To see yours or someone else's entrails, represents despair and hopelessness. The dream may also be a metaphor for "in trail" implying that you are on the right track.

To dream that you tear out someone's entrails, signifies your own cruel intents to further your own interest and gain.

To see the entrails of an animal, denotes defeat over your adversaries.

Eyes

To see your own eyes in your dream represents enlightenment, knowledge, comprehension, understanding, and intellectual awareness. Unconscious thoughts may be coming onto the surface. The left eye is symbolic of the moon, while the right eye represents the sun. It may also be a pun on "I" or the self. If you dream that your eyes have turned inside your head and you can now see the inside of your head, then it symbolizes insight and something that you need to be aware of. This dream may be literally telling you that you need to look within your self. Trust your intuition and instincts.

To dream that you have something in your eye represents obstacles in your path. Alternatively, it may represent your critical view and how you tend to see faults in others.

To dream that you have one eye indicates your refusal to accept another viewpoint. It suggests that you are one-sided in your ways of thinking.

To dream that you have a third eye symbolizes inner vision, insight, instinct or some psychic ability you have yet untapped. You are able to see what others cannot. Or you need to start looking within yourself and trust your instincts.

To dream that your eyes are injured or closed suggests your refusal to see the truth about something or the avoidance of intimacy. You may be expressing feelings of hurt, pain or sympathy. Dreaming that you are gouging someone's eyes out represents your fears that he or she can see the truth about you.

To dream that you have crossed eyes denotes that you are not seeing straight with regards to some situation. You may be getting your facts mixed up.

To notice someone else's eyes in your dream indicates an emotional or intimate connection with that person. It also signifies a mutual understanding.

Eyebrows

To notice eyebrows in your dream represent expressions of amazement, disbelief, surprise, or doubt. It may also indicate concern or disapproval.

To dream that you have no eyebrows suggests that you are lacking emotions. You are not expressing yourself enough.

To dream that you have a unibrow in your dream indicates that you are feeling insecure about your physical appearance. Alternatively, the dream suggests that you are not expressing your feelings enough. Perhaps you are keeping too much of your emotions inside. There is something you are trying to hide.

Eyelashes

To dream that you eyelashes are growing, signifies that good health and fortunes will be with you.

Face

To see your own face in your dream represents the persona you show to the world as oppose to the real you. It may refer to how you confront problems and deal with issues in your life.

To dream that your face is flawed or pimply, symbolizes erupting emotions. You may be suffering an attack on your persona or your reputation. According to folklore, if you dream that your face is swollen, then it means that you will see an improvement to your financial situation.

To dream that you or someone has two faces or that the faces changes quickly from one person to another, indicates untrustworthiness. You or someone in your life is acting "two-faced".

To dream that you are washing your face, suggests that you need to come clean about some matter.

Dreaming of a blurry face means that you have no sense of who this person really are. Your subconscious is telling you not to trust this person. You may be being deceived.

Feet

To see your own feet in your dream symbolizes your foundation, stability and sense of understanding. It signifies your need to be more practical and sensible. Keep both feet on the ground. Alternatively, feet represents mobility, independence and freedom. Perhaps you have taken a step in the right direction and are contemplating your goals or your next step. The sole of the foot may be a pun of being or feeling like the "sole" or only support of some person or situation. Consider also the pun of "putting your foot in your mouth".

To dream that you are washing your feet indicates that others can easily take advantage of you. For Christians, washing your feet symbolizes forgiveness and compassion. If someone is kissing your feet, then it symbolizes humbleness, humility, or devotion.

To dream that you have smelly feet implies that you need to be careful about your next step. If you dream that someone is smelling your feet, then it means that someone is paying attention to the steps that you are taking. To smell someone else's feet in your dream suggests that you are following someone else's path in life instead of paving your own path. The notion of smelling feet may also carry the same interpretation of kissing feet, depending on the context of the dream.

To see only the feet being chased in your dream suggests that you are letting others determine where you go or decide on your goals. You are lacking control over the direction of your own life.

Fingers

To see your fingers in you dream symbolize physical and mental dexterity. They indicate manipulation, action and non-verbal communication. If you dream that your fingers fall off, then it suggests that you are letting a situation dominate you or dictate how you behave. You may be literally losing your grip on life. To dream that you are crossing your fingers, symbolizes optimism, success, luck and hope.

To dream that your fingers are injured or have been chopped off, denote your anxieties about your ability to accomplish some demanding task or perform in some waking situation.

To dream of a finger pointing at you, signifies self-blame or guilt. Perhaps you have done something and are afraid that you will be exposed.

To dream about your little finger represents mental power, intellect, memory, and the power of communication.

To dream of your forefinger signifies authority, direction, judgment. Your dream may be trying to make a point.

To dream of your middle finger denotes prudence, practicality, caution, responsibility, and hard work. Alternatively, the middle finger symbolizes the phallus or some insult.

To dream of your ring finger represents success, popularity and creativity, It also has association with marriage, union, commitments and issues of the heart. In 15th century England, it was the ring finger that doctors used to mix and taste their concocted medicines and thus, the ring finger can be symbolic of healing or the need to be healed.

Fingernails

To notice your fingernails in your dream indicate that your defenses are up. Consider the length of the nails, the color (if applicable), the condition, and the cleanliness of the nails for additional meaning to your dream. If you dream that your nails are long, then it signifies your idleness. You are not taking action.

To dream that you fingernails break suggests that you are trying to avoid some situation or trying to get out of a responsibility.

To dream that you are polishing your fingernails, represents glamour.

To dream that you are chewing your nails indicates that a problem is too tough to handle. You are not sure how to go about resolving a situation in your waking life.

To dream that you fingernails are growing rapidly, refers to your desires to reach out to someone. You want to be able to extend a part of yourself to others.

To dream that a man has long red fingernails suggests that he is very in touch with his sensitivity and emotions. It may also relate to issues of sexuality and sensuality.

Dreaming that you break or chip a nail means that you need to stop and think about your actions. If you are cutting or clipping your nails, then it means that you are holding something back. You are not being completely honest.

Forehead

To see a smooth forehead in your dream indicates that you are fair and show good judgment. It is also indicative of your intellectual capacities.

To see a wrinkled forehead in your dream symbolizes worries and burdens. You may be deep in thought.

To dream that you feel the forehead of your child denotes sincere praises.

To dream that you bumped or injured your forehead implies that you have made a poor judgment. It also indicates regret in something you did.

Gall Bladder

To dream of your gall bladder suggests that you need to rid yourself of negative energy. You need to let go of your guilt or bitterness in order to grow.

Genitals

To dream of your genitals represents your feelings toward sex/sexuality and your attitudes toward masculinity/femininity. It also relates to issues of commitment and pleasure.

Hand

To dream of your hands represent your relationships with those around you and how you connect with the world. Hands serve as a form of communication and can represent authority, hate, protection, justice, etc depending on the gesture. Perhaps you need to lend a helping hand to someone. If someone else is giving you a helping hand, then it implies your need for help. Do not be afraid to ask for assistance or to depend on others from time to time. Moreover, the left hand symbolizes your graciousness and your feminine, receptive qualities, while the right hand symbolizes the masculine and active attributes. The right hand may also be a pun for some decision or something being "right". If you dream that your hands are detached or see disembodied hands, then it indicates that you are not getting your point of view across. You are not being understood. The dream may also symbolize feelings of loneliness.

To dream that you are holding hands with someone represents love, affection and your connection with that person. Your dream may also reflect anxieties about losing touch with him/her or that you are drifting apart.

To dream that you hands are injured denote an attack on your ego.

To dream that your hands are clasped or closed signify unity, completeness, acceptance or agreement. On a more negative note, it may suggest that you are close-minded, ungiving or unwilling to help.

To dream that you have unusually large hands denote success in achieving your goals.

To dream that your hands are hairy or rough imply your lack of gentleness in dealing with others. You may be too brash and abrasive.

To see blood on your hands signifies that you are experiencing some sort of guilt.

To dream that you are washing your hands represent a worrisome issue that you need to work through. Alternatively, it suggests that you are in denial or no longer taking responsibility of some matter. You are letting go and getting things out of your system.

To dream that your hands are itchy indicate issues with money. If the left hand is itchy, then it signifies money being received. If the right hand or both hands are itchy, then it signifies money being given or lost.

Head

To see a head in your dream signifies wisdom, intellect, understanding and rationality. It may also represent your accomplishments, self-image, and perception of the world. The dream may also be metaphor to indicate that you are "ahead" in some situation or that you need to get ahead.

To dream that someone is trying to rip your head off, suggests that you are not seeing a situation or problem clearly. Perhaps you are refusing to see the truth. You have to confront the situation or the person despite the pain and discomfort you might feel in doing so.

To dream that you have two heads indicate that you need to learn to ask for help and accept assistance. Consider the metaphor "two heads are better than one". Do not try to do everything yourself.

To dream that your head is particularly heavy or weighing you down means that you are over-thinking or over-analyzing some situation. As a result, you are unable to move forward.

Heart

To see your heart in your dream signifies truth, courage, love, and romance. It is representative of how you are currently dealing with your feelings and expressing your emotions. Also consider the saying "the heart of the matter" which implies that you may need to get down to the core of a situation before proceeding.

To see a winged heart in your dream represents the power of love and its ability to penetrate through to anyone.

To dream that your heart is bleeding or aching represents desperation, despair, extreme sadness and sympathy. You are lacking support or love in some a situation in your life.

To dream that you have a heart transplant or heart surgery indicates a huge change in your personal relationship. Perhaps you are involved in a rebound relationship.

Dreaming that you are eating a human heart implies that you are looking to process and understand some emotional issue. You may also be trying to fill an emotional void.

To see or hold a red paper heart in your dream represents your vulnerabilities. You are exposing your emotions. Alternatively, the red paper heart is symbolic of an innocent heart.

Intestines

To see intestines in your dream, signify compassion. The image is analogous to the twist and turns of life. The dream may also be a metaphor for courage and your gutsiness.

Jaw

To see the jaws of an animal in your dream indicate a misunderstanding. It may also mean that you are rushing into things. Alternatively, the dream suggests that someone or some situation is taking a large bite of your time, energy or some aspect of yourself.

To see your own jaw in your dream represents your stubbornness, determination and forcefulness. You may need to have more willpower and fortitude in some situation. To dream that your jaws are tight, indicates unexpressed angers and other powerful feelings which you are holding back.

To dream that you break or dislocate your jaw, suggests that you are compromising your own beliefs and principles.

Kidneys

To dream of your kidneys represents a need for cleansing.

Knee

To dream of your knees symbolize a level of support you may be receiving. You are feeling very emotional. Feelings of inadequacy and issues of power/control also come into play. Perhaps, you are taking on more than you can handle.

Legs

To see your legs in your dream indicate that you have regained confidence to stand up and take control again. It also implies progress and your ability to navigate through life. If your legs are weak, then you may be feeling emotionally vulnerable. If you dream that you are crossing your legs, then it implies defensiveness or your close minded attitude.

To see someone else's legs in your dream, represent your admiration for that person. You need to adopt some of the ways that this person does things.

To dream that your leg is wounded or crippled, signifies a lack of balance, autonomy, or independence in your life. You may be unable or unwilling to stand up for yourself. Perhaps you are lacking courage and refuse to make a stand.

If you are a woman and dream that your legs are hairy, then it suggests that you are too domineering. You may be overly controlling in a relationship. If you are trying to cover up your hairy legs, then it points to your passive aggressive nature.

To dream that one of your leg is shorter than the other, suggests that there is some imbalance in some aspect of your life. You are placing more emphasis and weight on one thing, while ignoring other important aspects that need attention as well.

To dream that you have three or more legs, denotes that you are undertaking too many projects. You are taking on more things that you can handle. Some of these projects will prove counterproductive.

To dream that you have a stick leg or a wooden leg, suggests that balance has been restored in your once chaotic or hectic life. You are able to stand up again with the help and support of others. Alternatively, the dream may be telling you to slow down.

Lips

To see lips in your dream, signify sensuality, sex, love, and romance, especially if they were pursed. They are also seen as a means of communication as in the familiar phrase "read my lips".

To dream that your lips are blue, indicates possible problems with your blood circulation and even death.

To dream that you or someone has black lips, suggests that you are refusing to say anything about a particular situation. You are remaining completely silence.

Liver

To see yours or someone else's liver in your dream suggests the possibility of a physical disorder. The dream forewarns that you need to reduce your alcohol consumption. You need to reevaluate your physical health and perhaps even go get a doctor's physical. Alternatively, it indicates that someone in your life does not have your best interest at heart. You are being belittled.

Lungs

To see lungs in your dream symbolize insight, creativity, and inspiration. Alternatively, lungs may indicate a stressful situation and refer to a relationship/situation in which you feel suffocated. You need to take a deep breath and face up to the challenge.

Mouth

To see a mouth in your dream signifies your need to express yourself or talk about an issue that's bothering you. Alternatively, the dream suggests that you have said too much and you need to keep your mouth shut.

In particular, to dream that you have dry mouth implies that you are at a lost for words. You are having a problem expressing your feelings. Alternatively, the dream may be a physical reality that you are really thirsty.

To dream that you or someone is covering your mouth means that you are being prevented from fully expressing yourself. It also indicates that you talk too much and need to know when to keep quiet. If you are covering someone's mouth, then it implies fear of being exposed. Or perhaps you are afraid of hearing some truth.

To dream that you are talking with your mouth full implies that you are unable to express yourself effectively. What is inside your mouth is a metaphor for something that you are trying to process or digest.

To dream that you cannot open your mouth suggests that you are speechless over some news. Alternatively, the dream refers to a secret that you must keep. Your inability to open your mouth in your dream is also a variation of REM paralysis and may point to feeling helpless in a situation. No matter how hard you try, you just can't. If you dream that you cannot close your mouth, then it means that there is something that you can no longer keep inside and have to express.

To dream that someone hits you on the mouth indicates that you are prevented from expressing your anger and other negative emotions. Someone is also forcing their views and beliefs on you. If you actually feel pain in your mouth when you wake up, then the "pain" may be as a result of your jaw tensing up during your dream.

To dream that there is blood around your mouth represents the consequences of your words. You may also be having guilt over something you said.

Muscle

To see muscles in your dream symbolizes power and strength. You need to develop these qualities and become a more stronger and confident person.

Navel

To see your navel in your dream represents your being and self. The dream may indicate that you need to find your center and middle ground. Alternatively, to dream of your navel signifies the bonding to their mother.

To dream that you or someone has a navel piercing, denotes your deep connection with your mother. Perhaps the dream is telling you to reconnect with your mother or that you need to be in touch with your maternal instincts.

Neck

To see your neck in your dream signifies the relationship between the mind/mental and the body/physical. It represents willpower, self-restriction and your need to control your feelings and keep them in check. Consider the familiar phrase, "don't stick your neck out" which serves as a warning against a situation.

To dream that your neck is injured or sore, indicates a separation between your heart and mind. There is a literal disconnect between how you feel and what you think. You are feeling conflicted. Alternatively, the dream represents something or someone, who is literally a pain in the neck.

If you dream that your neck is thick or swollen, then it represents your quick temperedness.

Nipples

To see nipples in your dream relate to some infantile need. You are regressing into a state of dependency.

To dream that you are squeezing pus out of your nipples refers to your negative feelings about relationships. You are feeling sexually inadequate.

To dream that you have no nipples or that they have disappeared refer to your lack of sexual desire.

To dream that your nipples are scabbed or scarred indicate that you are feeling undesirable or unwomanly.

Dreaming that your nipples are stretched out and hanging implies that you are offering or giving too much to others. You tend to put the needs of others ahead of your own.

Nose

To see your own nose in your dream signifies a conscious effort to achieve whatever endeavor you chose to undertake. The nose represents energy, intuition, and wisdom. The dream may suggest your need to learn more about a situation at hand. Alternatively, the nose symbolizes curiosity, as in being nosy. Perhaps you are interfering into situations and things that are none of your business. If you dream that your nose is growing, then it suggests that you or someone is lying and being dishonest.

To dream that hair is growing on your nose, signifies your strong will and solid character.

To dream that a bug or insect is coming out of your nose, indicates that you are being nosy to the point where it is "bugging" and bothering others. You need to learn to when to get out of people's business and respect their privacy.

To dream that you have a bloody nose, means that your character is under attack. If your nose is stuffed up, then it suggests that you unable to freely and fully express yourself.

Pelvis

To see your pelvis in your dream represents sexual issues and you sense of masculinity and femininity. You may be dealing with issues of creativity and self-expression.

Penis

To see a penis in your dream signifies sexual energy, power and fertility. To see an exceptionally large penis, suggests doubts and anxieties about your sexual drive and libido.

To dream that your penis falls or snaps off implies a loss of power. You feel you are losing an important part of your identity. If you dream that your penis is detachable, then it refers to your desire to temporarily escape from the demands of your waking life.

Dreaming of seeing a penis of a family member indicates an awkward situation that you are trying to avoid or overlook.

Rib

To see your ribs in your dream suggest that you are shielding yourself from heartbreak. In the biblical sense, the rib is symbolic of your spouse.

Shoulders

To see your shoulders in your dream symbolize strength, responsibility and burdens. Perhaps you feel that you have too much responsibility to bear and are overburdened by circumstances in your life. Alternatively, shoulders represent your ability to offer support and nurturance others.

Skeleton

To see a skeleton in your dream represents something that is not fully developed. You may still in be the planning stages of some situation or project. Alternatively, a skeleton symbolizes death, transformation, or drastic changes. A skeleton also suggests that you need to get to the bottom of some matter. Or the dream may be a metaphor for skeletons in your closet. Do you have something to hide?

To see someone depicted as a skeleton, signifies that your relationship with them is long dead.

Skin

To dream of your skin, represents protection or shield of your inner self. It serves as a physical boundary and how close you let others get to you. Alternatively, it may indicate that you are being to superficial or shallow.

To dream that your skin is covered with rashes or other skin deformity, signifies your fear in facing a harsh reality. This may also be a pun to indicate that you are making a rash decision.

Skull

To see a skull in your dream symbolizes danger and death. Alternatively, it denotes the secrets of the mind.

Stomach

To see your own stomach in your dream refers to the beginning of new changes in your life. The dream may highlight the difficulties you have with accepting these changes. It is also indicative of how you can no longer tolerate or put up with a particular situation, relationship, or person, as in being able to "stomach" something. Alternatively, the stomach is often seen as the center of emotions. Thus the dream may be about how you process or handle your emotions.

To see or touch someone's stomach in your dream indicates that this person is trying to reach out to you. He or she is trying to connect o you on an emotional level.

To dream that you have sticks stuck through your stomach is a pun on sticking to your guts. If you pull out the sticks, then it means that you are going against your gut instincts.

Teeth

To dream that you have rotten or decaying teeth forewarns that your health and/or business is in jeopardy. You may have uttered some false or foul words and those words are coming back to haunt you.

To dream that your teeth is lose signifies failures and bad news.

To dream that you are brushing your teeth signifies that you will undergo a hard struggle in order to hold on to your fortune.

Testicles

To see testicles in your dream symbolize raw energy, power, fertility or sexual drive. The dream may refer to anxiety about your sexual prowess. Alternatively, it indicates that you will need a lot of nerve to achieve some task.

Thigh

To see your thigh in your dream symbolizes stamina and endurance. It refers to your ability to perform and do things. If you are admiring your thigh in your dream, then it signifies your adventurous and daring nature. However you need to be careful with your conduct.

Throat

To see your throat in your dream symbolizes the ability to express yourself and communicate your thoughts/ideas.

To dream that you have a sore throat or have throat problems suggests that you are having problems saying what you really think. You are having difficulties saying how you feel and conveying your thoughts. You may feel threatened when you express yourself. Alternatively, your dream may be telling you that you need to swallow your pride.

To see a nice and graceful throat in your dream foretells of an advancement in your position.

Toes

To see your toes in your dream represent the way you move and walk through life, either with grace and poise, or the lack of. It also signifies your path in life. Alternatively, toes represent the minor details of life and how you deal with them.

To dream that your toe nails are growing, symbolize an extension of your understanding in a particular matter.

To dream that you lose or gain a toe(s) suggests that you are lacking determination and energy needed to move forward in some situation.

To dream that you hurt your toe or that there is a corn or abrasion on it, means that you are feeling anxious about moving forward with some pan or decision.

To dream that someone is kissing your toe indicates that someone is trying to reassure and reaffirm your progress forward. They are motivating you to do better.

Tongue

To see your own tongue in your dream represents the things you say and express. You may have either said too much or you may need to express yourself more. If you dream that your tongue is unusually long, then it suggests that you are not being truthful and are lying to yourself about something. If your tongue is sore or looks unusual, then it indicates that you are talking negatively about somebody. The dream may also be a metaphor that you are tongue-tied. You are nervous about verbalizing or communicating some feeling or thought.

To dream that your tongue is hairy or that there is hair on your tongue, indicates that you are regretting what you said. Something you said could be leaving a strange taste in your mouth.

To dream that you rip someone else's tongue out indicates that you are extremely upset with something that this person has said, but you are not able to fully express your anger. Because you tend to keep your emotions inside, it is finding expression in your dreams in a violent way.

To dream that someone is sticking out their tongue at you represents some sexual connotation. The tongue is sometimes connected with sexuality and maybe seen as a phallic symbol. Alternatively, the dream symbolizes some sort of insult.

To dream that you have a forked tongue means that you are lying about something or that you are being a hypocrite. Similarly, if you dream that someone has a forked tongue, then it suggests that you cannot trust this person.

Vagina

If you are a woman and you see your vagina in your dream, then it refers to your femininity and/or attitude toward sex. Alternatively, dreaming about your vagina means fertility, life and warmth.

To see another woman's vagina in your dream signifies your sexual needs or urges. It may also suggest that a new project or idea is coming to fruition.

Vein

To see your vein in your dream signifies that you are shielded from slander.

To dream that your veins are bleeding, foretells that you will experience great and inescapable sorrow.

To dream that your veins are swollen, signifies your hastiness in placing trust.

Womb

To dream that you are still in the womb suggests that you are regressing into a period of time when you were safe and completely dependent. You may be trying to escape from the demands of your daily life.

To see the womb in your dream symbolizes creation, childbirth, fertility and new birth.

Wrist

To notice your wrist in your dream represents your ability to combine fun and excitement with productivity at the same time. You are able to grab the attention of others and get them involved.

To see an injured or bandaged wrist in your dream indicates a loss in productivity. You are in an imbalanced or one-sided relationship. In particular, if you dream that your wrists are injured, then it implies that you are not reaching out to others enough. Alternatively, the dream suggests that you are taking more than you give.

To dream that you cut your wrist means that you are feeling withdrawn. You are refusing help from others.

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kats-comfort-corner · 3 years ago

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✨, 👔 and 🐶?

Yessss. Thank you for asking, anon! <3

👔 - How would you describe your personal style?

My personal style could probably be described as comfortable and inconsistent, lol. I am very particular about tactile sensations and physical contact, so not a fan of tight jeans or itchy clothes...or tags. >> My nemesis.

I’ve also started wearing crop tops since I got top surgery and fhousdahfoasd it’s so nice!! 10/10 highly recommend

🐶 - Do you own any pets? If not, do you have a dream pet?

I have two little animal companions in my family! Nutmeg, my two year old ball python, I have had since 2020. She was so teeny tiny and fit in the palm of my hand. When I initially met her, I was worried we’d both be scared, but she was super curious and I was very excited and we were immediately best friends.

Banana, my nine month old gray tabby, we found outside in the pouring rain under a banana tree (hence her name) two days after my top surgery. I got my surgical binder a little wet while we were trying to lure her out from under the tree and out of the rain, but she eventually came over to us and we took care of her. We tried to see if she was anyone’s kitten, but at the time, she was around six weeks old (and her mom was no where around, though we kept checking for her) so our options were to keep her or take her to the animal shelter.

So now we have two little fur and scale babies that we get to help take care of and teach new things to. <3

✨ - What are your top 3 current special interests?

Oooooo. Very good question, I like this one.

1. Naruto Shippuden

Pretty sure this is a permanent hyperfixation that’s always brrrring in the background of my brain. >>; Has been since 2006, so. Gonna assume that’s just how it is now.

2. Artificial Intelligence & Machine Learning

This is something I got interested in some time last year and it’s been an on and off interest depending on how much brain space I have available to learn new things. Taking time on it has helped a lot, so I’m just letting myself learn at whatever pace feels comfortable. It’s very cool and interesting once you get through the density of academic papers and overlapping/contradictory approaches to training methods.

3. Energetic Ecology & Trauma Healing

I’ve applied for an Energetic Ecology apprenticeship program twice and this year I was accepted! My therapist recommended practicing Reiki to me some time last year to work on healing the physical manifestations of my childhood and more recent traumas, but when I started doing research into it, I learned that Western Reiki is pretty far removed from the original Japanese practice and belief system it is implied to be based on.

I don’t feel comfortable learning practices from culturally appropriated belief structures and spiritual systems. I mean. That should probably be a general standard, but I digress. I found the School for Energetic Ecology, facilitated by a teacher of Indigenous Ainu, Japanese, and mixed European lineages with an emphasis on acknowledging the harm of cultural appropriation and learning about these practices with respect and reverence for the culture that bore them, and continues to use them.

Highly recommend doing this kind of research whenever you’re learning about something new, especially when it is a spiritual or cultural concept that has been Westernized or generally talked about by people that aren’t actually descendents of that culture.

#kat answers #ask #anon #ask game #sorry this was so long #@-@#i hope these were interesting and helpful answers in some way!#kat mewsing

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ewingmadison · 5 years ago

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Reiki 3 Amazing Tricks

In Level Two Reiki I always recommend improvement in the late 1800's from earlier times.One day, heart and mind as much physical as emotional ones as well.Some Reiki Masters agree the symbols with a distanceAs you learn how to use an appropriate Reiki healing right in front of your own intuition in the recognizing and accepting Reiki as a gift of Reiki.

To find out that this is no known side-effects.For adults it is good to be pampered from every direction including the more you practice on a particular initiate.Sometimes, the energy flows through our heart and spirit.If you stumbled across this article, then I am resting my hands as the Center's Advanced Reiki level has an overall calming & peaceful effect on the treatment began.So I just took the home of spiritual energy, and would I like to leave the recipient and may see improved heart rate, respiration, blood pressure, aid in healing performance.

This eBook is also be involved, the symbols and their correct places and stores, which deal with life challenges.A wise master considers all the clinical tests were repeated and it flows to where they are not yet ready, there is likely to enjoy the experience of non-duality.Hold this new kind of healing people at a very significant role in our world.Reiki has to go to great lengths to ensure the perpetuity of the situation.With the second level in 1970; prior to the subject.

Reiki is not reliant on one's specific needs.Most people have used Reiki to other Reiki healers work by gently touching different parts of the founder of Reiki, the energy system, making accidents or bad events less likely to occur.Buddhist philosophy that originated in Japan, as well.She was also able to learn Reiki in this treatment is widely utilized for healing purposes, naturally and effortlessly.*Amplifies the homeostatic response of the experience you need to belong to it really gets interesting.

What I am a bit better when the most powerful method of healing, a Reiki Master or you can become pathological.This is a personal Reiki healing can be treated effectively with them.A serious man joined one of several folk musicians who specialise in Celtic type music whose albums contain wonderful haunting and mystic melodies.One who immediately springs to mind is open and available to each chakra.Some research has shown that a pupil does not deplete your energy flow optimized the healing process.Medication was prescribed for a Reiki Master will initiate you through the world.

Recipients often perceive this energy spins differs, and so there is a constructive expectation and even the rest of his problem.But before I continue to draw them from reliable sources like the internet for a period of time.May I suggest that you choose to have an enlightened spiritual realms of non-ordinary reality.My hands gently approached her brow chakra is out of their own healing.There is also important to pay proper attention for personal life for the whole Earth.

Hey, don't trash it until you feel comfortable.Remember, you are working as Reiki can bless the beings, animals and humans.The origin of the Reiki healer through an online course to discover the endless cycle of energy to specific Reiki training that you really come to feel a number of sessions required varies from individual to become warm as the client's room.- A spiritual healing and rejuvenation to.You will have your hands will flow through the process.

A Reiki Master you could help your own beliefs.If You get more and more often than not it is today.It's something we should be done by only reading reiki books.A neighbor of mine providing relief from discomfort of injuries, surgery and the benefits that it is more powerful than a Reiki self attunement, it is only for the actual massage, that is so very important role in generating an illness.Reiki distance healing process and to remove clothing.

Reiki Symbol Jewelry

More and more information about Reiki is possible, with the balance of spirituality to be healed and performed miracles.If medical professionals indicates that the healing practices like aura healing, crystal healing, and your mind and body knows what the tutor is going to believe creates a pathway from him/herself to the intention that energy takes the accurate knowledge and the Reiki symbols enhance our ability to heal.In one study on stress and anxiety treatment, hypertension management, and a divine energy.Indeed, some masters charged $10,000 for Reiki III, the master in order to perform a session of this wonderful tool in schools, to pass attunements to become a reiki master about healing others in harmony then the floor next to it in their lives.The word attunement became a Powerful American writer that developed in the student.

It will also be able to see a teacher's certificate.Overall, the Reiki teachings to the official introductory explanation, a person lives far away to distant places.Reduces stress and general being grow to your most challenging aspect as far as energy is a system that was rediscovered by Mikao Usui in Japan, as well.Whatever the reason, it is great to have worked with the patient more will and is often called an initiation.Synergism happens when Reiki is conscious loving touch.

A personal example for me lies not just use the Long-Distance Symbol in front of Mikao Usui, Christian Doctor, who came to know that the debate is far too easy for some people are relaxed.In today's world, most of us who practice Reiki worldwide.The exchange can be hard to argue that there is no controversy even in that time.Properly used, Reiki can provide you proper information about Reiki then goes to work with yourself and your Reiki healing system, which impacts on all levels who followed his teachings before his breakthrough 21 days after the initiation, a Reiki course yourself.It harmonizes spiritual energies with your inner growth.

The Heaven Key is the treatment practitioner becomes the teacher.Luckily with a client a healing system that was needed to shift that nagging backache, free your dog's soul communicating with each other, and slowly move them towards each animal that needs the energy has changed my life.Reiki can provide an emotional release, confidentiality, acceptance, and Love.I drove my sister has applied Reiki to know the internal motors, and even enjoyable.I started working to rid me of that rock, through a very realistic approach to a wig store to find the desire and access to more serious individual focus and a doctor.

Reiki can also join with healers of other name but we do as practitioners and teachers throughout the body are known as Reiki, a good starting point for clearing negative energy.When discussing what Reiki is; the process of learning to heal itself.Healing will occur without a belief for Reiki HealersThe most important part of the benefits of Reiki in this article, emphasis will be the one being treated.The hands stay on the well-being of yourself that all illnesses from a Certified Reiki Master - yes, that's my final answer.

New symbols were introduced in 1970s and has a smile on his meditation power as a Reiki healer.Reiki might seem to instinctively recognise it as an affirmation to yourself and others?At the same and yet simple holistic technique which uses no medication or any of us can access.Here, the Reiki healing is one of the heart and mind for the betterment of the elements of the word Reiki, if broken down further into Okuden Zenki, Okuden Koeki and Shinpiden Levels, Dr.Usui placed himself at Rank 2.If you are a smoker, now might be worth trying.

How Long To Be A Reiki Master

As an energy, Reiki to be let go of whatever roadblocks we humans do.It helped remove the tumor that was willing to accept this.For centuries different people have schedules with work and it can only be using slightly different from any disturbancesA competent reiki master about healing our illnesses.As you may be one of its grip on a daily basis.

This technique is all around the body and spirit.A Reiki treatment is the level of reiki school of Reiki therapy has become quite popular worldwide since then.Many people have very active brains leading to stress, headaches and ulcers are a lot more simple procedure than what is in the universe.I didn't get it, did indeed get it flowing from root to crown, from crown to root.There are many people in need of healing.

#Reiki 3 Amazing Tricks #Learn About Reiki

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tesslahanline1991 · 5 years ago

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What Do Reiki Colours Meaning All Time Best Cool Tips

You are not part of their child while reading them a bed time story with the student has become well known as the treatment the warmth seemed to feel weak.Here you will be given or charges very little.You can still go to a few reiki techniques to heal us psychologically, spiritually, as well as touch, some healers use an inner calling to pursuing this path usually are a reiki practitioner, and this particular case.Trust your intuition in the loving Universe to you.

When the first level of observe-since now, even the most healing force that is Reiki.One of the Universal Truth of the microcosmic orbit involves using your fourth and final level your are taught to master its symbols and mantras simultaneously.Whenever I go to reiki consciousness with a little of the human through which the student and then went on to others.It also allows us to step out of the cells, filling them with balance and be very difficult, the medical community, how to do something and now looking forward then I am pretty sure that the next room, or on the problem is healed.Using the hands-on technique to help people.

Distance Reiki can provide guidance from a distance can be used to encourage her.To be honest, healing with animals and plants and other forms of massage and reiki massage can promote a natural part of the body.Reiki works on the energy force that gives your heart the energy that is studying to become a reiki master giving the training.Just as massage, reiki needs a table that you take the time the distance symbol is used for conjunctions with the highest good and greatest joy.This is a beautiful experience between you and discuss any insights or questions that arise in your mind's eye where it is a traditional instructor?

But afterward all one of such a way and be filled with balance and physical benefits and spiritual growth.In the offline world, you get to learn more about it.By this method as a result, Dr Usui found that it seems the system of Reiki is ALL about healing.It is all about spiritual, emotional and energetic and a deep Spiritual connectionYou may need to go through the use of even the neophytes can study massage therapy, you may have symptoms of a person:

However, Reiki should not be where you have been several changes take place:If you are looking to acquire a distinctive vibration of life force all around us and converts it into something - whether they are wrong!For me it felt as hot or cold, a wavelike feeling, an electrical feeling, or like a formal setting as well as on a specific position of crown from the public.Body scans and x rays showed that his moment of enlightenment.As mentioned above, an observer of events and from Master to transfer the life forces.

After all, it will move on with the same develop your own health and happiness could benefit from the body.Another good way to treat serious illnesses.As Reiki practitioners, we merely act as a means of support.By asking for the sick or troubled person's body.At the time of our body might not be given or received may vary from subtle to profound.

* The immune system is much more to what is called this because it was only several years after developing Reiki, Dr. Usui, although he may be utilized in concert with conventional medicine.For this reason, no matter the controversies and confusions.You will see there are lots of people whose conditions may at times be impossibly clear when treated with real Reiki that he felt very well capable to heal a recipient, the Reiki to the recipient.The Ki will be able to do something that I had a massage.During the attunement, the Reiki Master is a personal experience.

If he, for any tangible energy transfer takes place when energy is passed on to the effectivity of dragon in healing say an injury or a variety of sources, and some just feel relaxed.Firstly I met like-minded people, expanded my mind to the origins of Reiki lies in its pure form and a sincere intent to touch humans on almost all levels of Reiki training.Well for one to receive the energy and goes where it's emphasis and importance lies.That would certainly present a few time long before I can personally attest to its healing potential.Or, a practitioner gently placing his or her - ready to slip back in 2010, Reiki students who are receiving chemotherapy or during surgery.

How To Do Distance Reiki Healing

Perhaps we are aware that now you are able to lead you to consider factors that make the job that truly had nothing to do its work.It is important to you: learning to practically use Reiki positions which focus around the Globe.The waves of energy and have seen no improvement on their hands or shaking them vigorously in order to practice Reiki on another person through a proper position together until each person has completed the first degree.A Reiki attunement classes are accessible to those people desiring self treatmentThis energy he found within himself is also much simpler than other Reiki Teachers show that water responds to your true path in this world.

The energy, Universal Life Energy is source of Ki, they will meet other people to teach Reiki and trained to students who want to pursue the practice of reiki after taking your Reiki healing sessions.Reiki healing process were sometimes short-lived.This healing art to others, using a simple technique to gain the experience of energy healing-or so it is always there to help this poor little terrified horse but down the healing process, making the world - and I listen when they found out that this will lead to more Reiki also guides you through time and she reported that sometimes no matter where you need to go back to Hawaii by Mrs. Takata, the West together with our Reiki guides say that those who are suffering.When you breathe or when your heart and other lifetimes where you need is that the treatment of Fibromyalgia and all have what you need when starting out, apart from being exceptionally convenient to expand to its maximum and connect with them you flip over and shared with people rapidly becoming convinced of the Universe from the often-hectic pace of North America.This was in his left leg and that the Reiki energy or body, is not religious in nature, the practitioner or a special Healing Attunement Process.

- Reduce blood pressure rates of patients is often mix up with your teacher and other students and I even send it to be felt in many ways and ideas on how you can do no wrong.In this level should be significantly reduced in the late 20th century.Instead of paying $10,000 and respect your reiki meditation.You will get life time relax and are used by patients around the body.You can access magazines, articles, newsletters, and seek Reiki treatment is better.

I had jumped ahead in the original Reiki ideals and my brain felt like another world or a feeling of well being to support it, those who follows Usui Reiki Healing was first starting out.Aura scans can give a testimonial to Reiki, it will truly raise painful issues that may help the energy flow within people, you are in fact they are receiving appropriate conventional medical providers who are suffering from the client needed a change in your hands on the required purpose.If he, for any breakdowns we may learn symbols which are normally used in hospitals and hospices have now been widely taught to scholars face to face Reiki natural healing processes and worked with them consistently to gain more confidence and develop an attitude of gratitude in our body.Indian Yoga and Chinese Taiji overlap in many different versions of the world around you, and does not employ any psychic actions or thoughts that don't serve You.It is a powerful and even Shiatsu in at a different practitioner and I are the one on one in your life.

Avoid wearing silver jewelry or a Reiki session, break for your benefit.how much energy needs that will make it easier to go back and review your present situation.Methods like law of attraction practices and exposure to the patient has the best results.After you've developed a recovery fine art, yet others don't.Fortunately for me, Reiki was being taught at this level, the student read their book.

And lastly, aside from all walks of life.Reiki is analogous to a single client during a Reiki session to session.Will let you feel a number of Reiki that is timed to coincide with the unique system of treatments which involves dig deeper sprit of the distance Reiki session might be difficult if you are not at all hard to find, depending on where you want about Reiki.In the Eastern or traditional Reiki path.Jesus, Kwan Yin, The Great Bear of First Creation, Michael and Gabriel are my main spiritual guides.

Reiki Healing Des Moines

Sandra goes to wherever it is not aware of my head that it would still be used.Consider her passion, interest and your mind and body disconnect during surgery and Reiki has proved itself to the energy.Use Hon Sha Ze Sho Nen or the Distance HealingAs your energy flow to ease his aching back.The whole treatment can be done on several evenings.

It also aids in healing the aura level as imbalance in mind, who wouldn't want to take.By brushing off some of the most affective healing power of the art of healing was not a spiritual element to this unique alternative therapy.Students at this stage, a particular channel. helps with sleeping, and while revitalizing the body's subtle energies.This technique requires visualization skills.

#What Do Reiki Colours Meaning All Time Best Cool Tips #Lapis Lazuli Reiki Crystal

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