I've been doing a lot of reflection as of late, especially after this past class.
This past class was about the Torah and Tanakh in general, and the way the rabbi talked about the commandments (specifically the ten commandments) has made me really reflect on how I interpret them, specifically the fifth commandment, or honoring your mother and father.
This is a commandment I have wrestled with for a long time - in fact, it brought me away from g-d at multiple times. I was severely abused when I was incredibly young by my mother, and I used to feel insulted at the implication that I were to honor her while she got to live a better life. It was hypocritical, in my eyes.
But this rabbi surmised that this particular commandment was because parenthood is an act of creation, something that is like the g-d from which we come from. My realization is this: I don't think we're necessarily meant to take even these commandments literally.
I this particular commandment is more of a call to honor creation - creation is a gift, and like any gift, many people simply will not like it and will discard it. The person who abused me created me, but she did not honor creation. She didn't honor me, but I can still honor it.
I have started to honor creation much more. I'm too young, too unstable, not mature enough to be a father (though I fantasize about it), but I create all the time. I create relationships, I create with my hands through crochet. I create memories, I create my world. And I can honor who I am and where I came from that made me who I am. I've been learning one of the mother tongues of my family (Italian, since part of my family originates there) and it was judaism that inspired me to do this.
I don't think g-d wants me to honor my abuser. I think He wants me to remember the Holy action of creation. When I am a father, that act of creation will be Holy, and indeed, I am already joyful about the thought.
I have seen many people struggle with this particular commandment, but I think this perspective helps me personally. I don't think I ever have to forgive my abusers (plural), and I don't think I am commanded to simply because they happened to be family. I am commanded to recognize the holy, to elevate the mundane. In doing so, I will remember g-d. Through creation, I honor g-d and everything he has done for us, for me, and for our collective people.
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In general, I'm noticing a lot of Faith-in-Buffy on this rewatch that I missed on previous watches. 'Prophecy Girl' has a lot of it (after she dies, but also her smile while she's fighting vamps at the start of the episode), and obviously Buffy in 'When She Was Bad' is full of Faith.
And now, in 'What's My Line pt. 2', it's astonishing how much Buffy is Faith to Kendra. The way she provokes her, tries to bring out the passion in her - it's so Faith, so much a mirror of Buffy and Faith's relationship, with Buffy in the Faith roll. Just, you know, less homoerotic.
... I mean, it's still pretty homoerotic. Just... less so.
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Heal My Wounds
Yes Please Mami (Part 14)
Rhea Ripley x Reader
Tw: physical and sexual abuse, toxic relationship, selfharm, eating disorder
Summary: You are in a toxic relationship with an abusive man but manage to run away. A tall, black haired woman picks you up from the streets just in time so your ex doesn't get you. But who is she and why does she seem so familiar to you? As you get to know each other you start to notice weird feelings you never had before whenever she's around.
"Ohh but don't complain if you can't walk anymore afterwards" she groans. "Wanna bet? I've been through a lot and I was always able to walk afterwards"
"Hey, don't joke about it, it's not funny. You don't want to mess with me" she let's out a little laugh and her voice is deeper than usual. Normally it would scare you but right now it's just sexy as hell.
"I don't think the bath you ran will be used today" she laughs and sets you back down. "I don't care, I want you now" you groan and kiss her.
"Oh shit I like this side of you" Rhea moans and drags you to the bedroom. She pushes you down onto the bed and straddles you.
"You sure you want this?" she asks. "Hell yeah" you say and pull her down for a kiss again. It's filled with so much passion it makes you wanna melt.
You scoot up a bit to rest your head on the pillows and Rhea continues to kiss down your jawline, moving to your neck and upper body.
"What's your safeword?" she mumbles in between kisses. "What's a safeword?" you ask, your back arching upwards towards Rhea's lips.
"A safeword is a word or any other sign that let's me know I crossed a line and need to stop immediately" she breathes out against your skin, making you shiver.
"o- kay then I'll go wi- ith fox" you say trying to hold back your moans. "alright, fox it is" Demi hums against your tummy.
"Fuck Rhea stop teasing me, please" you squirm under her touch. "You want me so bad?" she looks up at you and smirks.
"Ye- yes please" she gives you a crooked smile "then beg for Mami" she grins. "I hate to do that but okay.." you sigh.
"Please Mami, please fuck me I want you so bad Mami, please" You try your best to satisfy her, keeping eye contact the whole time until Rhea gives in.
"Spread those beautiful legs of yours baby" she groans. You do as she told you to and she gently kisses up your thigh at first.
"Rheaa" you groan "please stop teasi-" you're cut off by Rhea thrusting a finger in you and licking your clit at the same time.
"Oh dear lord" your body tenses up and you grip onto the bedsheets "fuck yes" you breathe out. "You like that you little whore?" she smirks. "Look at Mami"
You look at her and keep eye contact as she keeps thrusting in and out of you making you moan loudly.
"Fuck Rhea- you were right- this really is *gasp* the best sex I ever had" you try to say during your moans.
"Bet I can make it even better" Rhea says and adds another finger. She continues to lick your clit, her free hand gliding gently over your body.
She slides it up your leg, slowly trailing up your lower abdomen, resting it on your hip for a little while and gently squeezing it before moving on to one of your boobs.
During that she never slowed down her thrusts or stopped licking you. "God I- I think I'm gonna cum" you moan.
"Too bad, cause you won't cum unless I tell you to" she groans against your pussy. You feel the vibration it causes.
"Mami please, I don't think I can hold it any longer" you squirm. "hmm then cum for me little slut" she hums and you release all over her hand.
You're panting heavily. Rhea licks off her fingers and gently runs her tongue all the way up from your pussy to your jawline and kisses you.
"You really know how to make good surprises" she whispers. You smile, still breathing a little heavy. "Thank you Rhea"
"What for? Making you feel so good?" she smirks. "That too" you grin "No what I actually meant was, for giving me the time I needed, not pushing me anywhere you know?"
She chuckles "I know, you're welcome" she mutters and kisses you again. "I love you y/n, thank you for making my day" you both smile at each other.
"I love you too" you reply. You raise your arm a little to signal her you want to cuddle.
She lays down half next to, half on top of you, and rests her head on your chest. One of her legs between yours, clinging onto you.
You wrap your arm around her and hold her tight. "I love you" you mutter and kiss her on the head.
She just hums in response, making you chuckle silently. "poor baby's too tired to speak" you whisper and kiss her again.
She takes you free hand and you intertwine your fingers, slowly drifting off to sleep.
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I decided to not let you suffer any longer you needy little whores. Enjoy part 14 ;)
Taglist:@babybatlover @legit9thlunaticwarrior @thatonepansexual2000
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